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tammyhybrid21 · 3 months

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Pebbles a Reflection

Now, this isn’t in the main tags for... personal reasons. So if you’ve somehow come across it be prepared because this is not going to be a light post. It’s both analysis and self-reflection using Pebbles as a “mirror” for real world issues.

Warnings should be obvious but just in case. This post will cover a lot of heavy topics. It will be covering suicidality, depression, disability/chronic illness, abandonment trauma, religious trauma, my thoughts on the deeper meaning of ascension and how it’s presented in Rain World and beyond, what it means to wish for nothingness.

So yeah, to start off with Hi, I’m Hybrid, or Tammy... I’m not in a great place, but I am slowly getting better... And I’m sure I’ve mentioned in another post somewhere... if I found Rain World back when it initially came out, back in 2017 I probably would have related the most to Moon. I still definitely do. I to am an older sibling who is brought low by circumstances, with a younger brother who is... a disaster. But-- but--

It is not 2017. It is 2024, or rather it was 2023 when I finally come around to properly playing and exploring Rain World lore. And I love Moon, she’s still definitely someone I can look at and see myself in reflection, we share flaws, we share burdens and yet-- More than that, I look at Moon and see my own older sister. Someone who was grown when I was just new to the world... It’s 2024 and I am Five Pebbles.

Or well...

I look at him and I get it. So, this will be me talking about it. In the best way I can handle my emotions as a semi well-adjusted Autistic Human Being. Full disclosure, if anyone else relates to my points throughout, you’re doing great. Keep it up, believe in yourself and your ability to thrive. Live on spite alone.

SO, let’s get to it then.

Sibling Dynamics

Let’s get the immediate thing out of the way first.

The Siblings. Whether it is explicitly canon or not they are very much coded to be read as such. Moon calls herself Big Sis Moon, whether that’s honorary or not... it is, what we have.

Moon and Pebbles share a lot. Resources, citizens, a literal connection via the bridge that became the Precipice. They probably share a portion of design template as well... we can’t know entirely. But it’s very much all canon things. The room in Rubicon as well is shared between them.

Whether people like it or not, they’re... basically treated and written like siblings. Siblings with a lifetime age gap. Or... several lifetimes really. Which... explains a lot of why Moon didn’t act to stop Pebbles. It’s not just a matter of her been too soft to, it’s also as much a matter of it been hard to see past that state where Pebbles is baby brother. Hard to remember someone is grown and beyond that when you still remember them when they were so new that they could be held in your arms. As if they were nothing. Also probably a reason she lets go of the anger so much, because again, she’s got a whole other perspective on it. Aside just memory loss.

All this is baked into the tragedy of the story.

...

All this is before you factor in the hand-me-downs aspects as well. Hand-me-down robes, hand-me-down citizens, hand-me-down problems. Pebbles is treated in canon much as the unloved surprise child. Very much in Moon’s shadow as the younger less capable sibling... at least it seems like that’s how it was with the ancients. And for all he says it was something that never bothered him, his actions really, really do speak louder. Can’t blame him for trying to escape the shadow he was cast in... something that was so unfair to them both.

Also I do think that he was LITERALLY cast in Moon’s shadow. It’s hinted but not stated that his structure is to the West of Moon’s... Sunrise in the East. My evidence for this is his own words... and the layout of the map. “Go out West past the Farm Arrays and down...” Also his dialogue to Rivulet if you take his Rarefaction cell first before meeting him. “Take it far to the East to her”

...

I really want to go on a deep dive, but truthfully-- I don’t need to at this point in time. I can save the most of it for later. But these siblings really had things stacked against them in every case truly. It was an unfair situation from the start.

Which back to circle around, I have a very specific reading, some of it because of my own headcanons, some from projection, but a lot from reading between the lines of why that drive for independence is there... As well the “I just want someone to say I did a good job” vibes. And what is this reading... well, I get the sense that at least some of Pebbles actions are driven by a wish to not be a burden.

It circles around, and I will likely come back to this later. But for now, yeah. These siblings are complicated.

Longing For Meaning in...

Death.

Oh boy, this is going to be a mess. So here’s the thing. I have... a lot of complicated thoughts and feelings in general on The Great Problem... how it’s presented and how the characters interact with it and the world. And yes, I’m viewing it through a probably entirely wrong lens because culture, BUT-- Let’s think about the presentation... Inside and out of the game. What continues, what fails. What changed, because here’s the immediate thing.

I’m a fully a believer in the wake up in a new cycle and continuing literally interpretation of the game’s cycle. I’d love to talk at length but all you folks need to know is yes, I believe the respawn in the game is actually canon in Rain World’s lore...

Sooo that established, what do I think is ascension. Well... death of soul, cessation of being.. at least how it’s presented in Rain World. So why did I start this section off by saying Longing For Meaning In Death... Well--

I’ll be honest. I grew up with the understanding that was death. Death is literally the end, no thoughts, no worries, nothing but the memories that others have left of you. And while for some folks the idea of nonexistence must be terrifying, one of my personal struggles for a long time was how that thought was such a comfort, something appealing... Something that in Rain World the ancients seemed to strive for, viewing it as an escape. That’s how ascension apparently is in Rain World, you cease to be... you become just cosmic dust in the void.

And oh, how Pebbles longs...

...

Which an argument can be made for all the iterators longing. Find the solution, find the answer to ascension for all. That answer is The Saint. But there’s something more with how Pebbles longs. Seeking and searching, and his attempts to bypass that taboo. And oh boy I have a lot of thoughts on that. A lot, lot of thoughts.

But not sure if I can put all those into words easily. Mostly because then I would be kind of telling on myself a lot. It’s the kind of information best kept between me and my psychologist... but at the same time...

The way death verses ascension is presented in Rain World. To ascend is to leave the world behind, become greater than yourself... become something more, often used in mythology and fiction alike to meaning going up, to answer the call to become some form of higher being. Become a God... a Spirit, or ascend to the throne. Etc.

Yet in Rain World it means to leave behind the world and to become part of the great everything. Death of soul, no reincarnation, no more respawns...

...

And oh, the longing for meaning in that. To become nothing, everything... part of the cosmic dust of the universe. To not have the pressure of existing anymore beyond the memories that others hold of you. What Sliver of Straw achieved. What the Saint grants.

A longing for meaning, longing for freedom.

Also this is REALLY not helped by the global religion in Rain World. While it’s presented as a good thing, again it’s presented as ascending beyond the cycle and into cosmic dust. “From nothing we are born and to nothing we will return”... the way I was taught about death. We are nothing but motes of dust in the eyes of the universe and a memory to God.

Death Seeking is the rule...

Hah, like finding everything as persecution...

Seven Red Suns

Hah...

Wonder if this actually surprises anyone. I have, STRONG feelings about Suns after all. And boy do they end up looped into here. And I think right after the longing for meaning part is important... because... they’re one of the big influences. Pebbles mentions it himself even, they helped him open up and explore new avenues. For the better but also much, much for the worse.

Suns is in... such an odd position in my head. Because I have made no secret I dislike them.

So maybe I should explain why.

I had a Suns in my life. Not AS bad, nowhere near as tone dumb, but I did... I had someone who pulls some of that same, patronizing stuff. The whole backhanded compliments, the play for pity and circling back as if they’re such an awful mindless bad friend. Which oh I’m sure people won’t think that’s how Suns is, but they did employ a pity trap card-- they did backhand things... they’re... not a good friend.

And, they’re the one who kind of led/introduced Pebbles to things. They’re all the biggest dumbass.

Even if you’re generous and call them well meaning. Suns is... one of the big dominoes to fall. Spearmaster as well.

Pebbles went to them as a cry for help. Again, with that longing for meaning, longing for something of substance. The Bug Maze conversation as the first time. And... what did Suns give him.

The bugs in a maze analogy and the statement that they have two options alone. “Do nothing, or work like you’re supposed to”... no alternatives like hobbies or ANYTHING. Thanks Suns, what great advice. I also take great issue with how Suns talks to others in general, and admittedly some of it is probably my own trauma from experiences but still.

Suns is just, absolutely no help to anyone.

They’re bad at people and then worse, they speak and present themself as if they’re so smart... as well downplaying things. Which maybe you won’t read it as that but I really can.

Suns is one of the factors that just, made Pebbles state worse. That anger and frustration that’s brewing, that pain burning under the surface. Suns might have been “helpful” and supportive but they just didn’t understand really, their issues is a certain kind of blindness in pride.

And of course, then they made everything... so, so much worse.

Twice even.

Thanks Suns...

Longing for Freedom

And oh, oh isn’t this the key and the core root of everything. Oh I have so many thoughts about this. I spoke a little bit about the longing for meaning in death, but a bigger one is the longing for Freedom. Oh it’s the thing that Pebbles even says to Survivor, to Monk, about that claustrophobic feeling of been trapped within yourself.

Trapped in the Cycle.

Trapped...

None of the iterators were made, none of them were born free. All of them were caged. Caged in structures, bodies so much bigger and greater than we could comprehend. A hivemind, a single mind... On the string, off the string, arguments that don’t matter because of what they’re all seeking. Tied to the cycles and yet unable to truly experience them, or so they were told. And oh, oh does Pebbles canonically suffer from this.

Even before the rot. This longing is inbuilt. To be free to be something more than what they were made and designed for. They never had any choices, and for Pebbles this longing for freedom gave him that fierce wish to be independent outside of Moon’s shadow especially... he wanted to be more, and this loops back around to my earlier wondering, that vibe I got from him where he viewed himself possibly as a bit of burden.

Moon so does worry about him, she prioritizes him...

Very much to her detriment. And oh if that’s not the heart of this tragedy. But oh isn’t that also so relatable. For both of the siblings this is something I feel keenly. That sense of longing of wishing, the choking sense that you are not free... dancing to someone else’s tune, to someone else’s whims. Going in circles and unable to do anything more...

Something that for Pebbles probably got worse and worse as the timeline stretched. He has such justified anger, hurt-- desperation. It’s all tied back to this, he wants to stand up on his own and be something...

...

Then comes the rot... and oh, chronic pain, chronic illness and the shackles that come with that. To realise you’re losing what freedoms you had before.

It’s not about a lack of care. Pebbles longing for ascension was not selfish entirely. It’s in his very dialogue, he wanted to be another example, prove that Sliver of Straw’s results weren’t a fluke. Weren’t by chance, and yet everything is stacked against him... he doesn’t get that freedom he’s longing for. Doesn’t get the chance to have control, to not be a burden...

Instead he brings his sister down and gives himself the worst illness an iterator could get.

Rotten Regrets

I am a chronic ill baby. I have always been in pain.

From babyhood to adulthood, no answers. Nowadays it’s chalked up as Fibromyalgia, as FND, as insert whatever catch all disorder here. Still not really answers... and for iterators that’s the rot as well. What causes it seems to be experiments but at the same time it’s treated in story as cancer and cancer is... well--

I saw something once where it was stated everyone technically has cancer. It’s just benign in most, needs something to trigger it into been dangerous and it makes me wonder...

But ultimately that doesn’t matter.

For Rain World, for Five Pebbles the rot is the culmination of a number of things. But I think a key one is kind of masked. It’s the factor of how Pebbles didn’t want Moon to be involved... And I don’t think this is a nefarious thing... just as I don’t think Pebbles truly fully understood the damage he was doing when he took the water, not until later and then he tried so hard to hold onto his anger over his guilt because if he let himself feel it...

But, this...

Did you know it’s always the hardest to tell the people closest to you that you long for death? Always the hardest to talk to the people who you KNOW would be worried, would be shocked, horrified try and convince you to not... the ones who so deeply care about you it hurts something deep deep down...

...the people who you feel like you’re a burden to.

That is why Pebbles didn’t want Moon to be involved. Suns meanwhile, I think it’s telling in how he reached out, and then the information Suns sent. They were in the same groups... Pebbles was comfortable, Suns had similar views and really was not helping, but oh Moon... Moon would have been so hurt, so worried, and how could he possibly tell her that? No, never, he can’t--

And then anger is easier, anger in the face of his own mistake.

I ask this, who was he most angry at. Moon for causing the rot, or himself ultimately?

...

And here’s a core of these feelings.

When you want to die, to be nothing. It’s not a matter of lack of care, not a matter of anger and wanting to hurt those around you... it’s a desperate plea, a cry out into the darkness of the world for some control, something tangible, sense of freedom. Which with the Rot looming as a threat, everything that followed. God, I have so many opinions and no words to explain them. But it’s so much deeper than just what we see on the surface.

...

All the iterators want to be free. Those who theorise death is the answer are just as desperate, just as seeking it. It’s just that burning unfairness, it’s what Pebbles had motivating him. To find the answer, to find meaning, freedom for them all. He even tells as much to The Artificer, his laments, another distraction, and he’ll try again, he has to get those results, now because if he doesn’t... what’s it worth with empty words to Moon? To the others in the local group? And he’s now on a time limit.

This, didn’t help. And boy, I can relate. Not in that I have cancer, but chronic illness is... energy draining. I have chronic aches and pains. I struggle and boy do I know how much worse that plays. Which loops back around to Pebbles unstated but very present vibes of feeling like a burden. The unwanted mess of a younger sibling.

...the unfavourite.

The rot been the culmination of all his failures and oh boy... I just finished Rivulet’s story and boy did it make me remember where I was going with some of these thoughts. Boy did it make me feel things because seeing how everything unfolds, how everything dominoes.

Pebbles choice of a non-verbal apology. A sorry without using that empty word.

“I’ve made my choice”

And in the end, that choice is still so in line with everything else. He’s the sibling that’s unwanted, cut himself off and has that belief that he’s the disliked one. Between the two of them Moon’s the more important one... and he’s sick anyway. Can’t fight it, ran out of options, but at least he can choose to face it on his own terms... that’s what Rivulet’s story comes down to. What his choice in the campaign comes to as meaning.

“I cannot run from my mistakes forever; Please Understand”

Is it any wonder he longed to be nothing but a memory? And you know what really sucks about it... the core background behind that is at least as nothing nobody has to be burdened by worrying about him anymore right? Moon won’t have to carry her worry, her protection of him anymore...

There is no suffering in the void, no thoughts in death, the dead worry for nothing for they have no thoughts, no needs... they are nothing but memories that the living carry.

Hah, the greatest irony... often what keeps someone from committing is that mess of burden.

Is it more of one leaving people caring for you or... the burden of how they will have to handle everything that comes with the loss of someone so dearly cared for?

#THybrid Personal #THybrid Art #THybrid Iterates #Not going to dare to put this in main tags #Sorry not for folks #You have to just discover it somehow #Also you can tell where I wandered off and then come back days later #Because I had cooled off on it #Relatability in characters is complicated

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fireemblems24 · 3 years

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Dimitri's Supports

I have waited FOREVER for this. Let's go. And I decided to put my patience to the test, saving Dedue for last.

Since it's Dimitri and I love him, and like Dedue who I also love, he's the only one unlocking all his A-Supports, I'm going to blog all my reactions to them like I did with Dedue. Part of me wishes I thought of this for the other characters, but honestly it would've taken forever lol. Plus Dimitri and Dedue get special treatment because I said so.

Raphael

Starting off with something light hearted, I hope. I do wonder if I'm going to regret not saving this one for the inevitably heavy-handed stuff coming later.

I'm seriously betting this is a support you're supposed to get in part 1 lol. Dimitri sounds young (or maybe I'm just haven't heard non-growl part 2 Dimitri enough yet?)

Dimitri's training made Raphael think he was dying lol. Dimitri's strength is really meme tier.

I need fanart of Dimitri and Chrom co-miserating their mishandled strength breaking something. And Lucina.

Lamo, Raphael has never felt a cramp before. Lucky bastard.

Raphael is a sweetie, going to apologize to his muscles. I really wish they gave him something else to talk about other than muscles and food. Not everyone needs Dimitri tier development, but I think I'd like Raphael a lot more if he just got a smidge more depth.

Got to say, it's a bit jarring to go from "moments away from a suicide charge in the rain" to "lol, Raphael, it's muscle pain." As glad as I am that I got this support, I do think some should've been locked to part 1.

And this isn't just for Dimitri's development. I also saw Marianne and Raphael's B before this support and she reverted back to her part 1 self too.

Catherine

Maybe it's just me, but he does sound a bit older.

OMG - Dimitri's back. 😭😭😭

Sorry, it didn't really hit in that first one since that seemed like a part 1 support.

Oh, cool! I was wondering if anyone would bring up Catherine returning to Faerghus. My bets is she's too loyal to Rhea. (I guessed right)

Catherine be simpin. That's ok, I get it.

So it's not because Catherine dislikes Dimitri, or that she's absolutely needed to rule House Charon, so I think Dimitri just likes her. She's cool though. I get it.

Lamo, she told him he'd better get his sleep like he's a kid.

Curious how the A+ support will play out.

Mercedes

Team Mom's support!

Oh, no, this one's taking a serious turn isn't it? But their initial supports were so light and cute.

Mercedes just told Dimitri that he's kind to a fault. Somehow I know he's going to deny that.

Annnnnd I'm right 😭😭😭He's still calling himself a killer and disgusting monster 😭😭😭

OK - so THIS seems perfectly in tone with his recent character development. But it's so sad hearing him still talk about himself that way.

Mercedes is such a therapist. I can't. She's too pure. But savage. I saw that Lorenz support.

"I am scared . . . so scared that I will forget their faces." 😭😭😭😭😭😭 Dimitri why????

Mercedes telling Dimitri to live in the present. Her supports are always so good. I legit think she's easily a top 10 favorite in this game.

Wow, Dimitri saying if someone told him that 5 years ago, he'd be different. DID NO ONE EVER GIVE HIM ANY HELP AT ALL???

I love how she's talking to him as a classmate, and equal, and not talking up to him. He's always wanted that.

Dimitri's never given his own dreams any thought 😭😭😭He really was just 100% living for other people most of the time. 😭😭😭

Awww MERCEDES, I can't. She says she just wants to keep being his friend. This is so damn sweet. And heavy. But still sweet.

It just hits super hard knowing how badly Dimitri just wanted friends in part 1. And looking back, Mercedes and Sylvain were really the only two who were pretty casual with him.

Aww, yeah, Mercedes not putting up with the bullshit, Dimitri. Telling him to quit the self-deprecation! God, I love her.

Oh, God, they both said the old FE code for "we're married" i.e. I want to "stay by your side."

Ok, @garlandgerard, I totally get why you ship this. Mercedes loves to nurture people, and Dimitri's emotionally needy, so they match pretty well. She also didn't put up with the constant self-put-downs, but stayed gentle about it. And they talked like equals too, like friends, which is what Dimitri always wanted. It's all very sweet.

Annette

Yeah, see, this one starts off with "your highness," but Mercedes it was just Dimitri. No hate for Annette. She's my girl.

These two always give me sibling vibes.

Haha, Annette "I thought I already knew you, but I'm not sure I really do." Hmmmm wonder what Dimitri did that made her think that maybe there's parts of him she didn't know. No. idea.

Hey, Annette, no one blames you for not knowing what to say to Dimitri when they reunited lol.

Annette too pure too, wanting to cheer Dimitri up with his favorite food.

Her not knowing what he likes to eat is 100% that moment when you realize you don't know someone's favorite color.

HOW can Dimitri have no strong feelings about food. I'm having pizza right now. Let me tell you, I have strong feelings about some food.

I love how easily Dimitri deflected from talking about himself lol.

Awwww, Annette wants to live with her family again. I'll make that happen, Annette. Don't worry.

Haha, they're conspiring together behind Gilbert's back.

They still have an A+ support, which is weird, because that seemed pretty well ended? Like I see why Catherine's needed more, but not this one. Still, not going to say no. I like their dynamic.

Ingrid

OCF they're training. God I love all the Faerghus childhood group though.

Oh, fuck, here comes Glenn again. My heart's not ready for this with Rodrigue dead. Poor Felix.

Ingrid being Dimitri's knight 😊😊😊 as it should be.

Haha, Dimitri asks her for an interpretation. Just make her your knight.

Glad he hasn't started saying "I'm not worthy!" Because right now it's about Ingrid's feelings.

Wow, there, Ingrid. "However you please, Your Highness." That . . . that sounds like an invitation. To "staying by your side."

Dimitri laughed. 😊😊😊

Oh, God, this is so cute. His pause asking her to support and defend him as his knight. 😊😊😊 OMG. I'm not sure that's all she had in mind though, good Sir, have you LOOKED in the mirror?

Seriously though, Ingrid's just surrounded by studs, isn't she?

Oh, God, I'm right. She didn't just mean knight. But Dimitri's too dense in that area to notice. She crushing hard. Girl, I get you.

She blushing, saying "for the Kingdom," naw, she just like him. Me too, Ingrid. Me too.

Dimitri always makes people promise not to die on him. It's so sad considering . . .

Flayn

With Flayn it's always a toss up. Sometimes things are super light hearted, and other times it's way heavy.

On a random note, does no one wonder why Flayn hasn't aged a day in 5 years?

Flayn having nightmares. Not allowed. I bet it's fucking Jeritza's fault. I'm glad you get to rip him a new one so many times in this game.

Why is Flayn apologizing?? She's never done a thing wrong in her life.

Right, Flayn's other support with Dimitri was pretty heavy. And it started so funny with him stomaching her food.

Oh, good grief, what's he apologizing for? Ok - so Dimitri did do some things wrong. But not to Flayn.

He lied. Let me guess. Her food actually sucks.

Aw, got it. He went right to the meal. Is he really going to come out and say, well it actually sucked 😂

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

WHAT ABOUT ALL THOSE MEALS???? AND THE TEA an embarrassing amount of tea.

Wait. He can't taste ANYTHING??? Like. How? Did he hide that????

Ok - I need to look at his team and dining dialogue.

OMG. He really never says a word about how anything tastes? He always just talks about smells????

OMG. How did I NOT NOTICE. I've taken Dimitri to dinner a million times. And tea timed him too many times to admit too.

AND I NEVER NOTICED HE NEVER ONCE SAID HOW ANYTHING TASTED. HOW.

OMG that support with Annette hits different now 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

OMG and Dedue's support with Flayn hits different now. Since he wanted to badly to find food Dimitri loves 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Does Dedue know? Is that why he's so dedicated to cooking??

Can I headcannon that?

OMG, I feel so awful about that jab about pizza. Dimitri CAN'T TASTE pizza or anything 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Please someone tell me there isn't any more "this awful thing also happened to Dimitri and he's failed to tell you" like learning he almost fucking died at Duscur. And now this. Dimitri needs to learn how to fucking complain.

The writers are so fucking mean to Dimitri. OMG. OMG, how am I supposed to take him to dinner and tea now, knowing this?

Why does everything hit so differently now? And so many Blue Lions supports are about food - but Dimitri can't relate

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

This game needs to stop bullying Dimitri.

But like, God, can you imagine? Not tasting anything? I'd starve. I'd actually starve. I never really get hungry. I really would starve.

On the flip side, he's good for Flayn then, since someone can eat her cooking I guess.

"I was just saying what I thought you would want to hear . . ." Dimitri - a summary.

Naw, that's a kind lie. That kind of lie doesn't really hurt anyone.

Oh - dear God. Flayn. Stop. No sampling pungent food.

Oh, she blushing. Dimitri got her blushing

Please tell me in their paired ending Dimitri gets his taste back.

Oh, there's an A+, does he taste something. Please tell me he tastes something.

This support though. It wasn't really one on my radar but

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Gilbert

Oh, man, this one right after Flayn's. God, I'm going to need the Alois one after this. Gilbert and Dimitri are two of the most somber characters in the franchise.

And I haven't forgotten that heartbreaking B support.

Haha Lambert sucked at lying too. Dimitri too pure. Weirdly, despite everything, it's still pretty true.

Oh, shit, oh shit, we're back to Dimitri's demand that Gilbert kill him. I'm betting you usually get that in part 2.

God, imagine seeing Dimitri recover only to see him beg for death again 😭😭😭😭😭😭

I need alcohol.

I need the Alois support.

OMG, shit, Dimitri. No. Don't. Stop.

Like, I know Gilbert won't really kill him, but damn. This support is heavy.

No, Dimitri, no Gilbert is not cruel for not killing you. God.

Oh, not sure about this. I get what Gilbert's going at here, but telling Dimitri that he's not allowed to die because he's got a duty is . . . I think Rodrigue's and Mercedes' live for what you want/the present is a LOT healthier.

At the same time, this is a pretty effective way to make sure Dimitri won't go and try this again, because he really takes duty seriously.

Dimitri doesn't wish to die? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Oh, thank God.

"Many times I have felt that I cannot afford to die . . . But this was the first time I truly feared the prospect." 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

"Is it really right for me to live?" Oh, dear God. I'm so soft for Dimitri. I can't.

Gilbert answered that one right. 100%.

Damn, these supports.

Alois

OK. I need this one. I really need this one.

I really hope Alois' inspiration is bad puns. I need bad puns right now.

Pretty sure this is a part 1 support though. I love how Alois, not Dimitri, is leading this. And that the person the Kingdom NEEDS is running around and getting attacked by monsters lol

Ok, bad puns. Bring them.

There we go. Thank you, thank you, Alois.

OMG no one's laughing 😂😂😂

Dimitri's laughing 😭😭😭😭😭😭

That's it. This is always getting saved for part 2. I need to hear part 2 Dimitri laugh.

I'm also so glad someone finds Alois funny. Dimitri and Petra need to start a club.

OMG I love the two other confused soldiers. I needed this 😂😂😂

Marianne

These two were so sweet in their C and B supports.

I swear I'm going to end up shipping Dimitri with everyone. Except maybe Annette, no hate, they just seem so much like brother and sister to me.

And Felix x Annette 100%

Survivor's Guilt - the pairing. Both wondering why they survived 😭😭😭

"There are so many others who are much more deserving of life . . ." - who said it? Marianne or Dimitri?

These two just understand how each other feels so well. It hits so different compared to Marianne's other romantic possible supports where they just try to make her smile.

Instead these two take comfort in finding someone who understands how they feel so well and feel relieved they can share that with someone.

Haha - "I must go on living. I cannot give in to death so readily." This coming right after his support with Gilbert. Good job, Gilbert.

They've both had it so rough 😭😭😭😭😭😭

"There is no need to force yourself to smile as your soul bleeds." Dimitri always gives such good advice that he never follows.

Aww, now at least it's getting cute instead of just heavy. Marianne laughed too 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Yesss, Girl, preach. I got a little sick of her other supports all being "cheer up!" Like I know it's all in good faith, but I'm so glad this chain exists. It just hits different.

Dimitri doesn't think he's strong enough to live his life. 😭😭😭 this game. I swear.

ohhhh - ohhh, Dimitri blushing now. And all she needed to say was they've been brought closer together. Congrats Marianne!

OHHHH tables have been turned. Now someone's making Dimitri promise he needs to live!

"I don't know what I'd do with myself if we lost you . . ."

"I promise to the goddess of Fodlan that I will never give you cause for despair."

OMG these two are being so sweet, I can't. 😭😭😭😊😊😊

Felix

Oh, boy, here we go. This should be . . . interesting.

Oh, we're starting off good I see. Felix telling Dimitri he needs to answer quickly or get cut in half 😔Felix. No.

Dimitri sounds so somber 😭

Dimitri admitting both are him - the vengeful "boar" and the friendly good person. And this is why I love him.

Dimitri feels the need to shoulder all the regret the dead feel, please don't. They wouldn't want that 😭😭😭😭😭

"The dead won't acknowledge your loyalty, they don't care." - Felix not wrong there.

I partly agree with the idea Dimitri is "serving his own ego" by claiming he's acting for the dead. I think it's a bit more complicated than that, but I think that's part of it.

Felix saying some good stuff here about the dead being dead and the living being living.

"If you keep stringing gravestones around your neck, you'll snap." - Felix, I don't know if you noticed but . . . uh . . . he sort of did.

Felix telling Dimitri to become a grave keeper is a bit funny. Not going to lie.

"I'm not immune to emotion you know." - just tsunderes things

Aw, Felix is upset his father died 😭😭 after all that shit-talking about Rodrigue 😭😭

Wish Felix didn't cut Dimitri off when he said "more than anyone you-" (care about other people, unless he joins CF and just kills everyone)

Oh, God, Felix is such a tsundere. "I couldn't stand the pathetic look on your face. That's all." Sure, Felix.

Kinda wish these two had an A+ though. Seems like there's more to do than the A+ with Annette and Flayn.

Really curious to see what their paired ending is like after that. Seems they're still learning to learn about each other. Well, Felix is. Dimitri didn't seem too upset lol.

Dedue

Ok guys. Here we go. I can't believe I managed to wait for this for last. Everyone hyped this one, so let's hope.

Really? We open with Dimitri having scars on his back? 😭

From 9 years ago? So scars from Duscur then?

Images of shirtless Dimitri now. though Not bad images.

He got scars protecting Dedue?

"It makes me think that is was worthwhile that someone like me survived." 😭😭😭 he's talking about protecting Dedue? 😭😭😭

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

"But I saved someone - saved you. That and that alone has been my crutch." 😭😭😭😭😭

I always knew these two were co-dependent.

Dimitri really out here saying that saving Dedue helped him "justify" surviving. 😭😭😭😊😊😊

OMG THAT'S THEIR STORY

OMG, poor Dedue. And Dimitri 😭😭😭did he literally "take a bullet" to save Dedue 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 and still has scars? No wonder Dedue's so loyal. Some kid he didn't know did that. That's one hell of an introduction.

And picturing little Dedue just resigned and angry and waiting to die and just 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Oh, Dedue, you've repaid that debt ten-fold I'm sure.

Ahaha, Dimitri's doing the "you'd better accept your worth!" discussion this time lol.

Dear God these two. Now Dimitri's bringing up that Dedue busted him out of the jail.

I swear, these two have more of a plot off screen than some routes do on screen.

And now picturing Dimitri resigned and just ready to die. And then Dedue busts in. 😭😭😭

"That was nothing more than my duty as your vassal." Stop that Dedue. Dimitri doesn't want you to be his vassal. He wants more.

Holy shit.

"You are irreplaceable. Cherished." 😭😭😭😊😊😊😭😭😭😊😊😊😭😭😭😊😊😊😭😭😭😊😊😊

Not to be that person - but I tell all my "friends" that.

Yes, Dedue, stop saying insisting you're just a "vassal" - that's a worse joke than Alois' puns from earlier.

"Please . . . do not look at me that way." What way, like you're about to make Dimitri cry, or like . . .

"You promised me you would build a Kingdom that is proud to boast of Duscur blood." - shit, man, these two. I just . . .

OMG so much emotion from Dedue. The only time I ever heard that before was in VW when he learned Dimitri died. But let's not remember that right now 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Oh shit. He called him "Dimitri." 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

And it made him blush.

OMG.

Guys, these two.

Aww, Dimitri looks so surprised. 😊😊😊😊😊😊

Oh, these two are so soft for each other. I can't. I just can't.

"To be your friend . . . is what I have always wanted." You're going to get it.

Man, I feel almost guilty S-Supporting Dimitri. He needs to pair up with Dedue pronto.

Dimitri sounds chocked up. OMG.

"So please call upon me when you walk alone at night." Ok. Dedue. Ok. Yes. Guys. This is all very straight.

I'm not saying it's - you know - cannon, but there's some big feels here.

Oh, Dimitri, stop it. You like Dedue's overprotectiveness. Don't lie.

Man, you guys were so right. Dimitri really just came out and said Dedue was "cherished" and "irreplaceable." Like, I'm not making this stuff up. And Dedue blushing hardcore just saying Dimitri's name.

They're both just so soft. I can't. I literally cannot. This support was gold. It was worth all they hype.

And learning more about how they meant. Dimitri really taking a bullet for Dedue there. I just . . .

I just want all the happiness for both of them. They're really something special towards each other. Like I legitimately think this is one of the most two-way loyal relationships in the whole franchise, and definitely the tightest bond in this game.

Like in past games you had Seth for Ephraim and Erikia and Soren for Ike and it's not like Ike, Ephraim and Erikia and etc don't care, but it wasn't the same level, you know? But this is such a two way street.

And I'm so weak for bodyguard with a crush. Like Seth/Eirika? Yes. Geoffrey/Elincia? 100%. Riza/Roy (Fullmetal Alchemist) there again. I'm sure there's more, but those are my top ones. Even Merlin/Arthur sort of counts even if Arthur doesn't know Merlin's his bodyguard lol.

I need to read fanfic for these two. I really don't want to spoil anything, but I'm dying. They're both just so sweet, and I just really love their dynamic. I really want to do a write up on it once I get to the end of the game.

#fire emblem #fire emblem three houses #dimitri alexandre blaiddyd #dimitri fire emblem #fe3h #fe16

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kittyprincessofcats · 3 years

Text

She-Ra S5 E09 - An Ill Wind

In which the Best Friend Squad’s back on Etheria and I’m back to writing up my thoughts about it. (The real question is whether I’ll manage to finish these posts before season 5’s one-year-anniversary.) I probably really don’t need to say this anymore, but there might be spoilers for the rest of the season in this post.

- I think it’s funny how Catra can’t stand teleporting, but what’s even more important is how visibly concerned for her Adora is each time. Have you seen how she touches Catra’s shoulders and looks at her with such a worried expression? D’awww.

- “Wow, you don’t trust the princesses? I am shocked.” No Glimmer, Catra’s 100% right. This has nothing to do with trusting the princesses; you really don’t know who’s chipped and which places are occupied by clones. Perfuma literally told you the rebellion was compromised.

- “Catra’s right.” THANK YOU, ADORA! (Also, I love Catra’s satisfied little smirk in the background when Adora says this.)

- I just paused the episode when they arrive in Erelandia and counted the Horde flags you can see hanging all over the town: 14, plus one giant Horde sign in the sky and a spire not too far away. Prime, are you compensating for something? (Also, Adora has an arm on Catra’s back again. Cute.)

- Is it a little disappointing that all the rebellions against Horde Prime on other planets got reduced to one brief exposition scene where a clone mentions they’re happening and a few quick images? Yeah. But I also get why the show just didn’t have the time for more and wanted to focus on Etheria.

- Speaking of, are those the magicats we see in the second image? Interesting… I’m not sure how I feel about the idea of Catra potentially being an alien as well. But then again, the show never clearly answers it one way or another, and there’s no reason magicats couldn’t have existed on multiple planets.

- Also, am I understanding this right: The Star Siblings started the intergalactic rebellion after meeting the Best Friend Squad? And now there are already rebels on several planets? Nice job, Star Siblings!

- “My heart aches for these misguided children.” I’m not sure if I’ve ever properly addressed the heavily religious symbolism around Horde Prime and his cult, but… that right there is *such* a Christian-extremist-coded line, holy hell…

- So Prime says he wants to use the Heart of Etheria “to bring peace to all the universe” and at this point I’m not entirely sure what his exact goal is. Does he just want to destroy all the planets with the Heart? Because I’ll be honest, I tend to find “I just want to destroy everything” a bit boring as a motivation in villains. What’s the point of him ruling the universe if there’s no one left to rule over? I mean, I know Prime had his whole “If there’s no one left, there are no wars, etc.” speech in an earlier episode, but that’s also just so dumb.

- Where did the Best Friend Squad even get those cloaks? Either way, Catra looks adorable with the outline of her ears showing under the hood. 🥺

- “I hope you, too, are full only of love for Horde Prime… and have no crippling doubt eating at your soul.” / “Brothers, there is nothing to see here!” Like I said in an earlier post, all of Wrong Hordak’s lines are absolute winners. Also, I love how the other clones just keep falling for his very obvious bluffs.

- Wrong Hordak learning to wink so quickly makes me jealous because I can’t wink. (No, I really can’t; I’ve tried. Whenever I try to only close one eye, I always end up closing both. If anyone has good advice on learning to wink, let me know.)

- I love the character designs of the mushroom people.

- Catra wasn’t wrong about the locals selling them out and not telling them anything useful. The others should listen to her more.

- Bow posing as the “average traveler passing though” is especially funny because I’m pretty sure there are no “travelers passing through” in times of Horde Prime.

Catra: “A town that hates princesses? Should I buy property here?”

Everyone else: *glares*

Catra: “Is what I would have said before I joined you. Go, team.”

😂😂😂 Catra��s quiet little “Go, team” in the end is what gets me most about this moment 😂. She’s adorable and trying her best, okay?

- I love how Wrong Hordak just calls everyone “brother” regardless of gender. Also, Adora’s little “Did you just wink at me?” / “That’s not how winking works!” moments are hilarious and adorable.

- “You’re wearing hooded cloaks, it’s highly suspicious.” Okay, mushroom lady’s not wrong, though. And I love how someone finally points this out, since hooded cloaks are so often used as “undercover” disguises in shows like this.

- That said, both she and mushroom guy earlier did try to sell the Best Friend Squad out super quickly. Like, I get that the locals are scared, but still… They could have tried to stay safe without running towards the clones to tell them everything right away.

- I’m just noticing that Erelandia has mushrooms everywhere. Obviously the people are mushrooms, but there are also mushrooms growing outside in the streets everywhere, and the shop they’re in is selling mushrooms and clothes with mushrooms on them as well.

- Both Bow and Glimmer blowing their covers almost immediately and Adora just quietly shaking her head at both of them in the background is amazing.

- Love Catra (and Melog) just casually stealing a mushroom from a mushroom lady.

- So Catra’s just chilling in a tree and eating stolen mushrooms and Entrapta wants to analyze samples that’ll be ready in 4-6 weeks – neither of them’s really helping right now. But then again, Catra wanted to leave in the first place because she thought the locals would sell them out (and she was right about that), so she probably thinks it’s not worth the effort.

- Also, you know who this scene with Entrapta and Catra is missing? Scorpia. If there is one problem I have with season 5, it’s that we didn’t get any Super Pal Trio reunion / moments with all of them on the same side now. (Or just in general, that we didn’t get to see Scorpia and Catra properly talking things out.)

- “That’s the windy one, right?” Okay, am I the only one who finds this line weird? Spinnerella literally has Adora, Bow and Glimmer trapped in a tornado as Entrapta says this. Obviously she’s “the windy one”? Entrapta can literally see that??

- “Lord Prime has given me peace.” Oh, I’m just realizing that’s just what Catra said when she was chipped. That’s got to be awful for Adora to hear again.

- Glimmer grabbing Bow and Adora’s hands and teleporting them out of the tornado was badass.

Adora: “How are we supposed to fight our own friends?”

Catra: “It never stopped you before.”

OMG. I love that Catra still considers their time as enemies as “being friends”.

- I really love Netossa’s entrance. What makes it really cool to me is that at that point the Best Friend Squad didn’t even know if there were any unchipped princesses left, so Netossa jumping in there with a casual “Welcome back, guys” was just an amazing moment.

- Also, I don’t know if I’ve said this before, but I really like that this season finally made Spinnerella and Netossa more important characters. (And I wonder how much network censorship of LGBT+ storylines had to do with them not being that important earlier on.)

- Hordak getting flashbacks of Entrapta again (while Prime looks at his older body’s memories) is just 🥺. I like how Prime talks about Etheria while Hordak slowly remembers more and more about his own life on Etheria.

- “So, the only person I’m fighting here is… my own wife.” I love the on-screen confirmation that they’re married! But also, Netossa wanting to attack Catra and Wrong Hordak at first was pretty funny.

- Catra and Glimmer’s respective expressions when they hear about Scorpia and Micah being chipped are a gut punch. Also, Netossa talking about how she has to get Spinnerella back is making me tear up.

- “Where are the rebels?” “Right beside you!” 😂😂😂 Amazing, just amazing.

- Love to see Catra taking out those bots. She’s so badass ❤️.

- “Be careful.” “Always am.” I wonder at what point Netossa started to realize what’s going on between Catra and Adora.

- Love Netossa whistling at She-Ra’s new look. Your wife’s right there, darling. But then again, who wouldn’t whistle at She-Ra’s new look?

- Honestly, why did anyone ever say Spinnerella and/or Netossa were weak? Their fight here really shows how powerful both of them are when they don’t hold back.

- “Stop holding back. She won’t.” Looking past how hard this must be for Netossa, this line really sums up why so many characters in shows like this seemingly become more powerful when they turn evil (or less powerful when they turn good): Because the bad guys have no reason to hold back.

- Adora firing a rainbow beam from her sword was amazing. I wish we’d gotten to see a bit more of She-Ra’s new powers this season.

- “Please. I love you. Come back to me.” I’m crying 😢. That’s a nice first taste of all the “I love you”s to come in the finale. And I love that it works (even if just for a bit). The whole “power of love helps you break free from mind control” thing might be a cliché, but it’s a cliché I love, so…yay, awesome!

- But also, and I’ll probably talk about this more when I get to the next episode (that I had a few problems with), I like how Netossa doesn’t only rely on the power of love, but still realizes she has to first fight Spinnerella without holding back to get her into a position where they can even have this talk.

- Yay, mushroom town is saved!

- Catra reassuring Netossa that Spinnerella will be okay was so sweet. She’s really trying to be nice and I think she’s doing great 🥺. (Also, Adora looks at her so proudly.)

- I just noticed that when She-Ra replaces the Horde symbol in the sky with her sword symbol, all the Horde flags around town are already gone, too. Did Catra, Glimmer and the others just like… take all of those flags down in between fighting the bots? Or did Wrong Hordak maybe walk around taking off the flags while the others were fighting?

- That said, the rainbow sword in the sky looks amazing.

- “I think Horde Prime is going to know She-Ra’s back.” “Good.” Love Adora’s determined expression here.

- Geez Horde Prime, no need to punch the screen. The screen didn’t do anything to you.

- Okay, so Horde Prime finally decides to go to Etheria himself, and when he announces that, Hordak looks at the crystal in his hand – it’s all coming together.

- “This is where the rebellion is hiding out?” “Yup. Why, have you been here?” The looks on Glimmer and Catra’s faces here are amazing. People have of course already written all kinds of amazing metas analyzing their expressions, but the short version is that Glimmer seems to remember their fight fondly, while Catra seems embarrassed.

- Perfuma trapping them all in vines and demanding to see their necks is not only hilarious, but also shows that the rebellion has learned from their past mistakes. 👍

- All of their reunions (Bow and Perfuma, Glimmer and Frosta, Adora and Swift Wind, Entrapta and Emily) were super sweet – I like big reunion scenes 🥺. Wrong Hordak meeting Emily was adorable. Perfuma clinging to Bow and crying about how she doesn’t want to be in charge anymore had me laughing so hard 😂.

- Okay so, I know Frosta’s punch breaks the mood a moment later, but I really think Adora wanting to officially introduce Catra to everyone after seeing her standing there alone while everyone else was having big reunions was super sweet. The way her face falls when she sees Catra standing there sadly, the way she asks her to come here so gently… it’s just so sweet. 🥺

- Also, unpopular opinion, but am I the only one who didn’t really find Frosta punching Catra funny? (And the same goes for Scorpia electrocuting her in the next episode, by the way.) I know these moments are meant to be cathartic “drag the former villain because some people are still mad at them” moments, but Catra’s whole story is largely about being a victim of physical abuse. Wasn’t there some way for the story to make fun of her without having other characters physically assault her? I like how Catra’s redemption was handled overall, but moments like those kind of rub me the wrong way. (Netossa trapping her in a net was fine though, because that didn’t actually harm her.)

- That said, Adora’s “Catra’s with us now. Okay? Hmm.” was hilarious. I love how she just gives the briefest explanation and then turns away from Frosta with a smile and little “hmm”, just completely expecting Frosta to be fine with this now.

- That ending shot of all of them together is epic.

So, what changed this episode is that Erelandia was freed, the space group has reunited with the remaining princesses, and Horde Prime is heading for Etheria. Good episode!

[Previous episode] [Next episode]

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leradny · 3 years

Text

ROLE SWAP AU!!!

din djarin is a jedi. anakin skywalker is a mandalorian. literally all problems solved.

anakin:

-given up by shmi to a mandalorian for a better life. they remain in regular contact, and when shmi is abducted by raiders ani's adoptive parent goes with him in time to save her life and avoid the tusken massacre.

- anger issues? mandalorian sparring sessions provide a healthy, socially acceptable outlet. actual warfare has a STRICT no killing children or civilians code.

- marriage? fine. perhaps they'd raise a collective eyebrow at anakin "deadliest warrior" skywalker marrying the senator of NABOO of all places. do they even HAVE warriors there? (they do respect padme after learning how she saved her planet but they tease her about her wardrobe, SURELY she's got a suit of armor somewhere)

-scared your wife will die in childbirth? if he still doesnt believe that medical technology advanced enough to replace limbs wont save padme, there's no need to put padme through the physically taxing process of pregnancy at all! there's plenty of foundlings who need parental figures! luke and leia would be happy surprises surrounded by about 7 adopted siblings. (Anakin, leave some for the rest of us)

- want to be a leader? well, young warrior, you may TRY to defeat the current ruler in combat. but no one's really worried because an older, more experienced mandalorian would just tease anakin and watch him lose his temper before trouncing him.

-anakin's force abilities (if he even has them in this au) fade away, but anakin with a jet pack is just as terrifying.

din:

- rescued by jedi instead of mandalorians. he's still a little too old, but as he has no family left and he is force sensitive, they wait a few weeks and he adjusts fine.

- actually favors minimal violence as a fighting style which is perfect for jedi. see: pilot ep where giant sea creature bites his ship and he just gives it a poke with his taser rifle until it lets go. doesn't round back with his ship's guns to kill it or anything.

- not to mention giving multiple warnings to his bounty, and when the warnings are up, he *freezes him in carbonite* rather than the vastly cheaper alternative of shooting him. yes, dead bounties get less credits, but a blaster is cheaper and doesnt take up nearly as much space as that portable carbonite system.

- despite his prejudice against droids, talks IG11 down from self destructing like 3 times because they're supposed to be working together.

-highly dedicated to the creed and only breaks it 2-3 times because he or someone else would have died.

-patient. only loses his temper ONCE (when he thinks greef karga was responsible for killing everyone in his covert) and STILL doesnt use violence. see also: his old crew, all of whom are absolutely terrible people, and nobody would have missed them dying but he still leaves them alive.

-while secure in his skills, din defers very easily to authority and has no ambition for power whatsoever. creepy senator palpatine trying to encourage din 'i refuse to be the main character of my own show' djarin that he needs more recognition? um, he's perfectly happy teaching padawans how to lift rocks, especially little grogu.

- even among the jedi, din would be underestimated because he is soft spoken, polite, and very minimal in his use of the force. he has one of the lowest death counts of any jedi to the point where people forget he has a lightsaber sometimes. but he's cut off a lot of limbs without even raising his voice. no one has ever seen din truly angry. and no one with an ounce of intelligence wants to see him angry.

-but because din accidentally becoming leader of something is funny: yoda retires without telling anyone. din comes in first thing in the morning to find yoda gone and finds a hologram that says "gone to dagobah i have. retired now. forgot to mention it i did, hrmm hrm!" while din is frowning at the inconvenience, yoda goes on, "first person who opens this message, grandmaster will they become."

- grogu drops his training saber when he senses din in distress. ("grogu, master din is busy right now, please focus.")

-din quietly puts the hologram back where someone else will find it. buuuuuuut the message goes on, "and master din djarin this is. check security feed you must." din tries to put it up to a vote but everyone votes for him anyway because will of the force, and isnt the jedi with the lowest body count best suited to leading the order anyway? grogu hears mental screaming from din and starts wailing for him. the trainer decides to call naptime a little early.

#the mandalorian #star wars #anakin skywalker #din djarin #spoilers

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irishseeeker · 3 years

Link

the story of us

summary: Five times Kate Sheffield and Anthony Bridgeton were just friends and one time they were more.

find chapter 1 here or here

------

chapter 2: I love you, ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?

Anthony Bridgerton’s summer gets significantly better the minute Kate Sheffield steps off the train.

He’d been abroad for the first two weeks of the summer with friends from university, Kate had only come for a few days before she went away with Mary and her sister, and he returned to England to wait out the rest of the summer with his family. He couldn’t stay away for too long, the guilt of leaving his mother and siblings alone would nag at him until he couldn’t focus on anything else. They needed him.

When they hugged on the platform, the familiar, comforting scent of lilies and soap filled his nostrils and he felt this calm feeling seep deep into his bones.

He’d missed her.

When they broke apart, he took her suitcase and he raised an eyebrow at the bouquet of red roses tied up with brown paper and a ribbon.

“Aw, did you get me flowers?” He teased, and she stuck her tongue out at him. He snorted loudly.

“They’re for your mum, dipshit.”

He pulled up her suitcase’s handle, beginning to wheel it and walk with her off the platform. “Charming. What did you get me?”

“Oh, this.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out her middle finger, smirking as she waved it at him.

They walked out of the train station and towards his car. It was a quiet station, right in the middle of the countryside. The main station was in the middle of town, which was a twenty minute drive.

He pressed a button on his car keys and the boot automatically opened. He was driving their Range Rover, one of their bigger cars for the country. They always spent the summer at their country home Aubrey Hall in Kent, leaving London for most of the summer.

The countryside used to be his favourite place.

Now, it just reminded him of his father. Every room and the long hallways were plagued with memories. Memories that would only grow older. His father wouldn’t. His father would never be a part of another memory.

“Jesus, did you pack your entire wardrobe in here?” He huffed as he bent down, putting his weight onto his knees as he hauled her suitcase into the boot.

She scoffed. "You brought at least six suitcases to university.”

They climbed into the car, Anthony clicked in his seatbelt. He turned to glance at Kate, who was tying her hair back in a plait. The golden sun shone through the window, lighting up Kate’s face and dotting it with subtle sparkles.

It suddenly became quite hard to breathe.

“Anthony?”

Her timid voice snapped him out of his daze, turning to her. “Yeah?”

Kate was frowning at him, her nose wrinkling like it always did. “You’re staring. Is there something on my face?”

“I wasn’t staring,” He mumbled, turning on the car and avoiding her eyes. “We better get back. Mum will kill me if we’re late for lunch.”

“I hope your mum hasn’t gone to too much trouble,” Kate murmured, fiddling with her hands with a nervous expression on her face. He knew that look, he had seen it a lot over the past two years. She was biting her bottom lip, which was an unwelcome distraction while he was driving. “It’s so nice of her to let me stay.”

He had been with Kate for five minutes and his mind was already drifting there.

It started a few weeks ago.

He had a dream.

It had started out relatively normal. He was laying on his bed, naked, wrapped in a white sheet. He wasn’t alone.

A woman was with him. A naked woman, her long legs covered by the white sheet. He couldn’t tell who she was at first, laying flat on her stomach tucked against his side.

He notices the dark curls first.

Anthony wraps a thick strand around his hand, watching it slowly twirl around his fingers and wrist. He can see the sharp edge of her jawline, the flutter of her long eyelashes and the fullness of her rose tinted lips.

All of her features form a face.

Kate.

Her face is carved into his memory. He can’t stop thinking about the sprinkle of dark freckles across her nose, the slight pink tint to her cheeks and the delicate leanness of her fingers as they stroked his cheek.

It’s like he never truly saw her before and now she’s all he can see.

The dream always ended the same way. Kate slowly moves on top of him, her hands on either side of his face as her body pressed against his, chest against chest. She leans down slowly, their lips inches apart-

He always wakes up the same way-panting and sweating.

At first, he thought it didn’t mean anything. Kate may be the first woman he had a platonic relationship with that he wasn’t related to and having a sexual dream about her didn’t mean anything.

It couldn’t mean anything.

But-

He kept having the same dream.

The woman was always Kate.

It was ruining his life.

It’s not like he had never noticed Kate. He wasn’t blind. She had always been beautiful. Anthony had just never thought of her that way. He had never allowed himself too.

Kate was his best friend. Kate had sat down in the same tutorial as him and quickly began to argue with him and he had been stuck ever since.

He wouldn’t lose her because of his behavior. His track record with women had been treacherous and Anthony knew it was mostly his fault.

Something had died inside of him when his father did and he had accepted that. It wasn’t fair to expect others to as well. He was emotionally unavailable and he wasn’t ready for a relationship. Siena had proven that.

That painful disaster wasn't something he planned to repeat.

He couldn’t fix himself. There was a part of him that would always be broken.

Anthony realized he hadn’t responded to Kate, so he asked her about her trip. He knew most of the details, they had facetimed nearly every day since they had been apart.

Kate had suddenly appeared in his life and she had remained there ever since. It still frightened him, how in two years she had become so vital. Kate had become his anchor. He never intended for her to happen but it was out of his control. Kate had fit into his life in a way no one else had since his father had.

She was the first person in a long time Anthony felt understood him. There had only been one other person who ever could and he had died.

Kate had lost her dad too. It wasn’t a taboo topic between them. They could speak openly about who they had lost and they understood each other.

He didn’t have to be anything for her. He didn’t have to be her emotional support person like he had to for his mother. He didn’t have to be a surrogate father like he did for his siblings. He didn’t have any pressurizing responsibilities like he did in every other part of his life and he didn’t have to put on a false façade that he was fine and everything was fine.

Anthony would do anything for Kate, he just didn’t have to. It was a comforting thought that lifted the heavy weight off his shoulders just a little.

He had survived two years without crossing that line with Kate.

His subconscious had decided to take it upon itself and do it for him. It was as if a switch inside of his brain had flicked and it was all he could think about. Thinking of Kate in that way.

Lately, Kate was all he could think about.

He was convinced his subconscious was playing tricks on him-if something was meant to happen between them, it would have.

It didn’t matter, in the end.

Kate would never see him in that way. Kate had always been hard to read but he had become accustomed to seeing through the cracks in her built up walls and he was certain she would never feel anything for him but friendship.

He could live with that.

He just couldn’t live without her.

“Here we are,” He said, nodding his head towards the house as they pulled up at the two black iron gates guarding the property. He pushed on the break, reaching out the window to type in the key code to open the gates. “Aubrey Hall.”

“Wow,” Kate said, leaning forward towards the dashboard as they drove up the long pebbled driveway towards the house. “It’s beautiful. It’s finally time to meet the Bridgertons.”

Anthony let out a low chuckle, nodding his head. He didn’t doubt for a second Kate knew every little detail he had told her about all of his siblings, he did talk about them a lot. She had met Benedict and Colin a few times when they visited Oxford and had seen Benedict quite a bit once he became a student himself but she had never met his younger siblings or his mother.

He had never brought anyone to Aubrey Hall before.

His mother, of course, appeared at the front door as soon as the car came to a stop. He didn’t doubt she had been waiting at the window, peeking behind their curtains for them to arrive. Violet Bridgerton had been asking a lot of questions about Kate since Anthony had asked if she could come to stay.

His mother didn’t ask questions without insinuations behind them.

Benedict and Colin had found it particularly amusing, taking every opportunity to take the piss out of Anthony. They gleefully egged on their mother’s eagerness of meeting Anthony’s potential girlfriend despite Anthony reminding his family daily Kate was his friend.

Apparently, he talked about Kate a lot. He obviously disagreed, which made Ben and Colin tease him further. What fun things do you have planned for you and Kate when she comes, Anthony? A romantic picnic in the gardens? What would Kate say about that, Anthony? Aw, didn’t you and Kate do that Anthony? Anthony, are you feeling okay? You haven’t talked about Kate in five minutes. The girls had even joined in. Even Frannie, his sworn ally, had teased him a little.

Traitor.

He was adamant he did not talk about Kate that much.

It was a perfectly normal amount.

They got out of the car and Violet walked towards them, ignoring Anthony as she pulled Kate into a hug. “Kate, it’s so wonderful to finally meet you. Please, come in! Anthony, get her bags darling.”

“Miss Bridgerton, it is so nice to meet you. Thank you so much for having me,” Kate said, handing her the bouquet of tulips and a gift bag. “It’s not much, but I hope you like them.”

“Kate, we have heard so much about you.” Violet Bridgerton smiled at her and gasped at the gifts, ignoring Anthony’s glare at her jibe and Benedict’s snort from the doorway. “Oh! You shouldn’t have. Thank you so much. These are gorgeous, I’ll have to get a vase-girls, stop that right now! Excuse me, dear.”

Daphne and Eloise were on their third argument of the day, right on schedule. They quickly shut up and ran away from their scowling mother who was charging towards them.

They all watched Violet in amusement before turning back to each other, and Benedict grinned at Kate and wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

“Katharine.”

“Benedict.” Kate chimed back at him, reaching up to squeeze his cheek. “You’re so grown up.”

Benedict turned to smirk at Anthony, his eyes sparking with amusement. “Anthony has been counting down the days until you arrive. Marking them off that little corgi calendar you gave him, bless his little heart-”

Kate gasped, turning to Anthony delighted. It made something inside of his chest flutter a little. “You’re using the calendar?”

Anthony shrugged, trying to appear unbothered. “It’s practical. The girls liked the pictures.”

“Ben, I hope you’re not taking the piss out of our brother without me.”

Lord give him strength.

Colin, his 18 year old brother who was about to set off travelling on his gap year in a few weeks, strolled into the room. His brown hair was sticking up in all directions and he probably just woke up.

Benedict, smug as ever, turned to smirk at his younger brother. “I was only warming up.”

“Hey, Kate.” Colin grinned easily at her, crossing his arms as he joined them. “Don’t lie, Anthony. The girls liked looking at it for a few minutes. I drew a penis on it one time and you got all moody-”

Anthony narrowed his eyes at his brothers.“I will murder you, you know that right?”

Kate glanced between the three brothers, looking highly amused. “This is going to be fun.”

Deciding he had had enough of his brothers for the afternoon and validly cautious of what else was going to come out of their mouths, he gestured towards the staircases. He nudged Kate along. “As delightful as this little catchup is, I’m going to show Kate her room.”

“Can we get you guys anything? A snack? A condom?” Colin called after them, Benedict and his snickering filling the hallway. Kate snorted from beside him, jogging up the steps.

Anthony threw the first thing he could grab, which happened to be one of Hyacinth’s tiny pink uggs. It narrowly avoided his great aunt’s blue clay pot on the hall table as it hit Colin smack on the head.

“I’d ask for one but then you’d actually have to be having some to need them, right Col?” Anthony winked at his brother who was rubbing his head, glaring at Anthony from across the hall. “Hang in there, mate.”

“I have plenty of sex, thank you very-”

“Colin Bridgerton!”

His mother had walked into the hallway just as her third youngest opened his mouth and landed himself right in it. Her jaw dropped open and Anthony took the opportunity, laughing at his squirming brother, to nudge Kate upstairs just as his mother started giving out to Colin.

“They’re idiots,” Anthony said, rolling his eyes as they walked along the first floor’s maroon carpet towards her bedroom. His eyes anxiously flicked towards Kate, hoping they could ignore the awkward mention of condoms.

He was going to kill Colin later.

“Funny idiots,” Kate agreed, smiling at him as her eyes moved around the hallway and the painting and pictures on the walls. All of the siblings were on the first floor, except for Gregory and Hyacinth who were on the second floor with their mother.

“I’ll give you a tour later, let's just drop off your stuff first.” He opened the door to the guest room, that would someday be Gregory’s room-it was right opposite his bedroom. “Here we are. I’m just across the hall.”

“This place is incredible. It’s so beautiful,” Kate said, turning to him with a teasing smile. She dramatically bowed, her long dark hair flipping over her head and back as she stood up. “Lord Bridgerton.”

“Fuck right off,” Anthony said, collapsing on the bed and Kate joined him. The familiar memorizing scent of lilies and soap filled his nostrils. Kate had looked up their families on an ancestry website last year and had found out Anthony was from a long line of nobility and had called him Lord Bridgerton for a solid month.

God, he had missed her.

He turned to her, flexing his biceps as he stretched his stiff arms over his head. “Are you happy to be home?”

She nodded, her chest moving up and down slowly as she relaxed on the bed. “I loved being away, but it’s so nice to be back and to be home. Did you get my postcards?”

The last person he had gotten a postcard from had been his grandmother when he was younger until Kate. She’d sent him a few from around Europe, from Rome to Paris, and he kept them all in the drawer beside his bed. He’d started eagerly checking the postbox everytime post had come once she had started sending them. “I did. They were great. They’re in my room. Otherwise, Gregory or Hyacinth would find them and colour them in. I loved the Amsterdam one.”

“I thought you would. Oh! I got you presents,” Kate said gleefully, pulling neatly wrapped bundles out of her bag as she sat up on the bed and crossed her legs. “They’re not much, but I thought you might like them.”

“You didn’t need to get me anything,” Anthony said, completely stunned as he took the presents Kate eagerly handed him. She looked so excited and it made his stomach flutter uncomfortably.

It wasn’t butterflies. Anthony didn’t get butterflies. It was probably a digestion issue or something.

He unwrapped the first present, grinning at the perfectly neat wrapping. It was so Kate. Each corner was perfectly taped and folded properly. He unwrapped a small shot glass wrapped in bubble wrap.

“A shot glass, of course.”

He let out a low chuckle, “I wouldn’t expect anything less, Sheffield. Thank you, this is brilliant.”

The next present was a big box of foreign sweets and crisps, ones that reminded him of being on holiday. There was a mixture of haribos, chewy sweets from Spain and exotic crisp flavors that you could never get in England.

His mouth watered. He had an extreme sweet tooth and Kate was always pestering him to eat some fruit or vegetables. He’d smugly remind her he’d never had a cavity. “This is amazing. I’ll be hiding these from everyone or they’ll be gone in an hour.”

He unwrapped the next package which was an assortment of jams, of different colours and varieties.

She grinned as she pointed out the different flavors. “I thought you’d like them for when we go back to university. I know how much you love jam, I wouldn’t want you to starve. I got them in Normandy, at a farmer’s market. The pear one is unbelievable.”

Anthony had never been gifted in the kitchen. They’d been lucky to grow up with nannies and cooks, and both his parents had been talented in the kitchen-something that was not passed onto Anthony. Besides meals in the catering hall at university, Anthony had solely survived on toast with butter or jam before Kate took pity on him and started feeding him.

“This is the last and my favourite one.”

The package felt soft and he carefully unwrapped it, curiously pulling the little bag out of the paper. It was a brown leather case with a fine detail of stitching around the edge.

“It’s made out of Italian leather,” Kate explained, gesturing to the case. “It’s a case for your pocket watch, so you don’t break it. It can clip onto anything, so you’ll always have it.”

“Thank you,” He mumbled, looking oddly dazed. He reached into his pocket, slowly pulling out the silver chained pocket watch his father had passed onto him. It didn’t really make sense, having a pocket watch when watches and iPhones existed. It was old fashioned.

The watch had been passed through the Bridgertons for years and his father had loved it. He’d let Anthony play with it when he was younger until he had been given it on his eight birthday. It was one of the last things Anthony had of Edmund Bridgerton before he died.

He opened his mouth to say something, failing to find any words that could explain how grateful he was. The pocket watch slid into the case perfectly. “Kate. This is..this is amazing. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Kate said, smiling softly at him and lightly squeezing his arm. He was staring right into her soft brown eyes, full of warmth and kindness. She knew how much it meant to him and she had thought about him and got him this.

He wasn’t used to people thinking about him like that.

He felt something stirring inside of him, a tight feeling in his chest about to burst as he looked at her. She was looking right at him and he swore he saw her eyes flicker between his eyes and lips. “Kate-”

They both jumped startled as their eye contact broke, the moment fading, when there was a loud knock on the door, followed by a voice. “Anthony? Kate? Lunch is ready.”

They stood up slowly, Anthony sliding the protected pocket watch into his pocket and clipping it to the inside of his pocket’s material and headed to the door.

Benedict had been the one sent to fetch them, Colin was nowhere in sight. “Colin is trying to convince Mum to let him eat lunch. His comment didn’t go down well earlier and he’s apparently corrupting our younger siblings.”

Anthony let out a deep chuckle, turning to Kate with a smirk. “If you want to punish Colin, take away his food. He inhales anything in sight.”

Once they sat down for lunch, Kate was an immediate big hit with the Bridgertons. Hyacinth threw a fit until she was allowed to eat lunch on Anthony’s lap, quite suspicious about his new friend. Kate quickly got into her good graces when she put two carrot sticks in her mouth to look like a walrus, making walrus noises until Hyacinth laughed so hard she spat out some of her juice.

Daphne chats away to Kate about her plans to study architecture in Cambridge after her final year in school, which Anthony had spent the last few weeks helping her prepare for her applications and for her interviews. Daph announced she was pleased there was finally another female in the house to combat the massive levels of testosterone, as Eloise apparently didn’t count (who gives her the finger which their mother quickly scolds her for) and Frannie is always disappearing.

Anthony knows he shouldn’t have favourites. He loves all of his siblings, he really does-but Francesca is his favourite.

His brothers are his best friends, Daph is the person he shares a lot of the same hobbies with-riding, swimming and Eloise is the person he debates and watches documentaries with. At six and three, Gregory and Hyacinth are still babies. It’s different with them, they don’t remember their father. Anthony desperately tried to be that for them. He had to take care of them after their father died and Hyacinth was born a month after and their mother didn’t leave bed for weeks. Anthony is definitely their favourite sibling and it does wonders for his ego.

Francesca, however, is Anthony.

They both aren’t the loud ones-they leave that to Colin and Eloise. They’re not the artistic ones either-Daphne and Benedict were the ones who had art shows and were stars in their school plays.

Anthony is pretty sure Francesca is the only other sibling who will join the family business in the future. He can’t say for sure because Gregory and Hyacinth are so young, but he doesn’t doubt if for a second for Francesca. They read the newspaper most mornings together, they send each other articles and book recommendations when she’s at home and he’s at university. They’re both fiercely competitive and play on any sports team they can.

Frannie is very serious for a twelve year old with an incredible emotional intelligence, something Anthony was always told he was like, except for the emotional intelligence part-he’s been told he’s rather lacking in that area-and he knows she worries about him. Their father’s death had given him a responsibility that he didn’t want her to have. Francesca didn’t agree. She had been nine when he passed. Yet, she had always been at this side-helping with the babies, insisting he ate if he had forgotten and talking to Colin when he acted out in grief and fought against Anthony helping him.

They had all helped each other in their grief but Francesca was the one who saved Anthony from drowning.

They understood each other and Anthony wouldn’t have survived that first year after Edmund’s death without her. Their mother had been recovering from a traumatic birth and was still grieving, he had cancelled his gap year plans to take care of the family before university and was trying to stop them from falling apart.

Whenever she needed time alone, she disappeared in the house, usually to her bedroom, the library or the treehouse. Anthony had always retreated when he needed some time to breathe. Her spots had become Anthony’s spots, whether it was in Kent or in London, and they would sit in silence doing whatever.

Frannie turns to him one morning at breakfast, handing him the finance part of the paper and taking a sip of her orange juice. “I like her.”

“Kate?” The topic of their conversation was cooking pancakes with Eloise and Daphne, the three of them laughing about something. She catches his eye, grinning at him before turning to listen to what Eloise was saying.

“So do you,” Francesca said, as if it was a casual thing to say. “I think you should, you know. It would be nice, to be happy.”

Anthony actually stutters. “I-I am happy.”

Francesca sighs, shaking her head. “Of course you are. You have been since Kate arrived. I wonder why?”

Everyone else joins the table, cutting off their conversation as they hand out the pancakes. Anthony stares at Frannie in bewilderment before turning back to his food. If his internal battle and feelings were that obvious, he needed to work on being more subtle.

That summer is the best Anthony has ever had.

One warm August afternoon, Anthony takes Kate away from the house so he can get her to himself for a bit. He decides to take her horse riding to the nearby stables where they used to take lessons and go riding.

Anthony hadn’t ridden since the summer of his father’s death. They had spent every summer in Kent before their father died and before that, they had lived there until Anthony was five before permanently moving to London. Their father had always loved riding and had taken them out for rides and lessons, but their mother was never that fussed. Anthony had been shocked when his mother announced she wanted to go back to Aubrey Hall this summer, having been so insistent on staying in London for three years straight. He didn’t think she would ever be able to go back, but she seemed to be coping well so far or he just hadn’t seen her break down.

His siblings could just go to the stables if they wanted to go for a ride, but none of them were that fussed except for Daphne. She had always loved riding and she had competed in competitions for years before quitting to focus on school. It wasn’t the same after their father died, he had always been at every single one of her competitions. It had usually been the two of them and their father going out for rides together during the summer.

Anthony and Daphne had gone for daily rides since their arrival in Kent, deciding to continue the tradition they had always loved. Convincing Kate to, on the other hand, was not looking likely.

Kate was biting her bottom lip, looking at the horse in front of her. “I don’t know.”

“You’ll be fine.”

She was still hesitant. “Is there like a pony or something? Something smaller?”

“This is the smallest mare they have. She’s very calm. Eloise rode her last week and she’s never been fond of riding.”

“I don’t trust it,” Kate whispered, stepping closer to Anthony as if she was afraid the horse could hear her.

Anthony let out an amused, slightly frustrated huff. He was trying to be patient, but it was wearing thin. “It’s a horse, Kate.”

Kate turned to glare at him, narrowing her eyes. “Not all of us came out of the womb and onto a saddle, Anthony. Horses are large and intelligent creatures. What if it doesn’t want me to ride it and throws me off?

“Do you trust me?”

Kate sighed, rolling her eyes. “Yes,” She said, begrudgingly.

He extended his hand to her. “I promise you’re not going to fall off. I’m going to walk you around before we go for a ride. She’s a good horse, she won’t throw you off. Just get up and shut up.”

“Wow. You’re so kind. With an attitude like that, it’s a mystery to why you’re single.”

He mimicked her, and she mimicked him back, and they stood there mocking each other for a few minutes until she shoved him into the muck.

He wouldn’t talk to her for ten minutes, covered in dirt, and she nearly wet herself she was laughing so hard, and he eventually joined in.

He eventually helped her onto the horse, a gentle brown mare called Iris. Kate clutched at his hand as he helped her up and the electricity sent jolts down his spine. He walked her around for a bit before leading her for a ride across the fields, which Kate seemed to love.

They trotted for most of it and Kate made him take a picture with her with the blooming fields in the background to send to Mary and Edwina.

He definitely doesn’t send it to himself later and keep it on his phone.

It was one of the best afternoons of his life.

Things tended to be amazing whenever Kate was around.

It was becoming quite the problem, especially whenever she smiled or laughed, causing him to get this uncomfortable, warm feeling in his chest.

Kate even gets up with him in the mornings with the babies when he gave his Mum a break, watching cartoons with Greg and Hyacinth who wake up at illegal hours most mornings.

The rest of his siblings slowly join them, everyone tired and weary as they sit on the couch. The early morning silence slowly begins to fade with the chatter in the room.

“I love this.”

“Mm?” He hums, turning his attention away from the cartoon to look at Kate.

“How noisy it is here. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family so much. It could just get quiet at times, you know? I’ve always wanted a big family.”

“Oh,” says Kate softly, looking down at a sleeping Hyacinth against his chest. “She’s adorable.”

“Yeah,” said Anthony, smiling down at his sister. “Until she’s screaming her lungs out after you turn off Peppa Pig after four hours of watching it.”

Kate chuckled softly, “She's quite the character. She looks like you, you know.”

“You think?” said Anthony, his voice softer.

She nodded, smiling warmly at him. “You’re doing an amazing job, you know that right?”

It wasn’t anything like his father would be doing if he was still here. Anthony had made his peace with the fact he could never be the man his father was. However, hearing it from Kate made it feel like he was doing something right.

“Alright, Greg,” Anthony was kneeling down to his little brother’s height, holding him steady. “I’m going to take these stabilizers off, and you’re going to pedal towards Kate. Just like we practiced on Eloise’s old bike.”

Gregory blinked up at him, eyes wide and terrified. “What if I fall?”

“You get back up,” said Anthony, brushing his thumb over his cheek slowly. “Besides, I’m going to be right beside you. I’d never let you fall.”

After a few tries, a few near falls and some tears, Gregory successfully cycles around the front garden all by himself.

He swung Gregory around, grinning at her laughter as the rest of the Bridgertons clapped.

Kate was smiling at him, and the sun made her face glow, and he knew in that moment he would do anything just to see her smile like that at him for the rest of his life.

They sat around the fire on the patio later that evening, roasting marshmallows on metal rods.

“I’m sorry if this is boring,” said Anthony, biting his lip as he glanced around at his family. “I know it’s not the most exciting summer.”

“Are you kidding?” said Kate, grinning at him as she shifted Hyacinth on her lap. She had refused to sit anywhere else, and Kate didn’t seem to mind at all. Anthony was eternally grateful, as he didn’t have it in him to deal with a Hyacinth Bridgerton tantrum that evening. “This is amazing. Thank you for inviting me.”

She’s smiling at him again and it’s getting very hard to ignore the hammering inside of his chest.

“She fits in well, don’t you think?” Violet Bridgerton says to Anthony in the kitchen, one evening after dinner when they’re both cleaning up. “As if she belongs here.”

“Mum,” Anthony says sternly, in a tone usually reserved for a parent scolding a child, but he knew exactly what she was insinuating. His mother’s favourite hobby was meddling in his love life. “Don’t go there.”

He wouldn’t let himself go there.

He had been internally debating it with himself for a while now, but he always came to the same conclusion. His reputation wasn’t stellar. His relationships never worked out.

He wouldn’t risk losing Kate.

It almost felt normal, her teasing him over a girl-as if the last few years hadn’t happened. As if his father’s death and Anthony’s role in the family hadn’t drastically changed everything. As if his relationship with his mother wasn't broken.

“Where, dearest?” Violet said, smirking at her son before walking back into the dining room.

Anthony sighed, leaning against the counter. He pushed the thoughts spiraling in his head and his recurring dream to the back of his head.

The women in his life were going to kill him.

They get the train to London on a Saturday for their friend Rob’s 21st birthday, and they stay for the night. They spend the day wandering around London, grabbing lunch at Camden market before getting ready at his house.

Kate’s dress is black and clings to her curves in a way that forces Anthony to remember to breathe.

Rob’s parents are divorced and his dad spends a lot of his time abroad, so the party is in his dad’s empty townhouse in Kensington. The party is in full swing by the time they arrive and they’re both drunk and laughing within an hour. They haven’t seen their university friends in a few weeks and when Anna sees them, she screams and jumps into their arms.

They eventually get separated, Anthony plays beer pong with some of Rob’s school friends and Rob, Luke and Ethan from uni. His head is buzzing, he feels slightly dizzy but the party is packed, he’s having a good time and he keeps on drinking.

When he eventually spots Kate, she’s leaning against the wall of the kitchen talking to a tall guy. Anthony doesn’t recognize him and the feeling in his chest isn’t warm or fuzzy.

He can’t help himself. “Who is Kate talking to?”

Rob turns his head around, looking in the direction Anthony nodded. “Oh, that’s David. We’ve played football together a few times in uni. He’s decent.”

Anthony takes a long swig of his beer.

Kate eventually finds him outside with the rest of their friends, Anna beside her as they join the group. It had taken everything in him to not interrupt her conversation with David, or whatever the fuck his name was. Kate was far too good for him. He had distracted himself with a blonde girl called Ella instead, who had left the party over an hour ago.

It didn’t work.

“Hey,” said Kate, yawning softly as she climbed onto his lap, pulling his blanket over herself. Anthony tries to look unaffected, but his heart is hammering inside of his chest. She's all he can smell-lilies and soap. The scent is overwhelming. They were all sitting in camper chairs around a firepit, and they stayed there until 5am before Rob told people they could stay over in any bedroom that they wanted.

He carries a drunk Kate to bed, finding an empty bedroom and laying her carefully on the bed.

He takes off her heels, wipes her makeup carefully off with the wipes she had brought in her bag and he leaves a glass of water beside her bed. “G’night.”

“Where are you going?” Kate asked, frowning slightly as lifted her head off the pillow. She looked so adorable, her eyes half closed as she looked at him.

“I’m going to sleep on the sofa.”

“I’m pretty sure someone is having sex on the sofa. Just sleep here.” Kate mumbled, yanking at his shirt to get him onto the bed.

Anthony hesitated, biting his lip. This was definitely crossing a boundary. The rest of the rooms were taken, the couch was currently in use and he didn’t fancy sleeping on the floor. He also knew he wouldn’t sleep at all, knowing Kate was right beside him.

He convinces himself he’s staying to make sure she’s alright, in case she needs to get sick or needs something. Kate is already asleep by the time he climbs into bed, determined to stick to his side. He’s practically falling over the edge of the bed when he falls asleep.

They wake up in each other’s arms the next morning.

“Do you ever think about the future?” Anthony asks Kate one evening, after a long day of eating food in the living room and having a Friends marathon.

Kate’s lying on her back, attempting to throw popcorn in the air and catch it with her mouth. “My only plans are becoming a solicitor and getting a corgi.”

Anthony snorted. “I don’t get your obsession with those dogs.”

“Insult corgis and see how it works out for you.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Is that a threat, Sheffield?”

“No, it’s a warning.”

They’re sitting on opposite ends of the long sofa. She kicks his foot, and he grabs her foot and pulls her towards him. He knows exactly what he’s going to do, and so does she-he ignores her protests.

“Anthony, I swear to god-”

He grabs her easily, leaning over her as he tickles her sides. She’s incredibly ticklish at the age of twenty one-and there’s a loud cough.

Anthony springs off Kate like a cat touching water.

“I just came to see if you guys wanted pizza,” Eloise says slowly, a mixture of amusement and shock plastered on her face. “We’re ordering some for dinner.”

“Pineapple, please.” Kate squeaks, avoiding Eloise’s gaze and instead focusing on the screen.

“Pepperoni,” Anthony says, trying to keep his facial expression impassive as he held his sister’s gaze. Eloise leaves after that, an amused hum leaving her lips before she wandered off.

They stay on opposite sides of the couch for the rest of the night.

They go for a swim in the lake the evening before Kate goes home. The sky looks like cotton candy, the sun setting in the distance and the warm air makes the cold lake bearable.

“Why do we have to swim in the lake when there’s a perfectly good pool?” Kate asked, glancing back at the house and back at the lake. “There’s nothing in it, is there?”

“Adventure, Katherine.” He took off his t-shirt, stepping into the lake before feeling his feet sink lower and eventually lose their grounding. “There isn’t anything. Come on.”

Kate hesitantly follows him in at a snail pace, which forces Anthony to stare at the water instead of her yellow bikini.

“What was that?” She squeaked, splashing the water as she jumped up in the air, feeling something brush against her feet. She grabbed him, launching herself into his arms.

“Don’t be such a baby,” He teased, trying desperately to ignore the fact she fit perfectly into his arms.

Kate always fit.

His hands were wrapped around her waist, pulling her against him. This was breaking every boundary and rule he had put in place, but he just couldn’t find it in himself to care.

He could feel her soft skin under his fingertips, drawing patterns against her skin.

He felt her body relax, but she didn’t let go of him. She looked at him, pouting slightly. “I’m not a baby.”

“Kate?”

“Mm?”

Their faces are very close.

He lets out a shaky breath. “I’m glad you came here.”

She blinks at him, nodding her head slowly as a small smile erupts on her lips. “Me too.”

He’s going to kiss her. He’s going to kiss her. There’s no way he can’t kiss her. He has to kiss her. He’s going to ki-

There was a scream, and both of their heads flicked towards the two children running towards them, Colin and Benedict behind them.

They quickly broke apart, Anthony swimming towards the edge of the lake in case Gregory or Hyacinth rushed in. He nodded at his brothers apologetic stares, who clearly hadn’t meant for their younger siblings to disturb Anthony and Kate.

He doesn’t kiss her.

“Thanks for having me.”

“Thanks for coming.”

They’re both standing on the train platform, Kate’s train pulled into the station a minute ago. She’s going back to Somerset for two weeks before university starts, and then they’ll be together again.

He tries not to look as disappointed as he feels.

“I’ll see you in two weeks?”

“Not if I see you first,” She said, grinning at him as she slowly pulled him into a hug. She can never reach his neck, so she wraps her arms around his waist instead and leans her head against his chest.

Anthony holds her tightly. Anthony had needed her here this summer. It had been their first time at Aubrey Hall since their father died. Kate had made it easier. She’d made it fun.

As her train pulls out of the station and a waving Kate through the window disappears, he can’t help the pang of regret he feels as he watches her go.

He can’t help but think of everything he should have said, but didn’t.

He has a bitter taste in his mouth for the rest of the day.

“I think everyone’s going to the pub in an hour. Do you want to go?”

They’re finally back for their final year of university, and they’re busier than ever. Before they know it, the leaves have fallen off the trees and the cool November weather has taken over Oxford. The workload, readings and assignments are piling up and they had spent the evening reviewing each other’s thesis proposals and giving feedback to each other.

Kate looks up from her laptop, typing for a few seconds before shaking her head. “I can’t. I have a meeting.”

Anthony looks up from his laptop, raising an eyebrow. “A meeting?”

Kate takes a deep breath, staring at Anthony with a “If I tell you this, you have to promise you won’t make fun of me.”

That catches Anthony’s full attention, “I promise.”

“It’s our last year here,” Kate begins, closing her laptop and standing up. “I want to make the most of it, get more involved. So, I’ve joined the botanist society.”

Anthony blinks. “The what?”

“It’s a science society, about gardening and plants. I always use to garden with dad. It’s actually really fun and interesting. We just drink and chat and they organize trips to museums and botanical gardens. There’s a trip to the Netherlands later just before Christmas, I’m going to go.”

His face softened. He knew what it was like, avoiding things if they reminded you of someone you lost or clinging to them for dear life. He could take the piss out of her, but he doesn’t. “I think it’s great. I didn’t know we had a botanist society.”

“David told me about it, actually.”

“David?” Anthony asks as if he doesn’t know, but he knew exactly who David was. He can hear his hammering pulse in his ears.

“I met him at Rob’s party. He’s in his final year of biology. He’s nice.” Anthony doesn't know what to say, so he doesn't say anything. He just feels sick. Was David going to be there?

“That reminds me,” Anthony says, swiftly changing the subject before he said something stupid. “I got us tickets to the law ball. We should go together.”

Kate blinks at him through her reflection in the mirror. “Together?”

Anthony shrugs, blushing slightly at his impulsivity. “Everyone else is bringing dates. Anna and Luke are going as friends. We’re both single. Unless you’re bringing someone else?”

Kate shakes her head quickly and Anthony has to stop himself sighing in relief. “No, no. That’s a great idea. I’d love to.”

It was getting extremely difficult to fight his feelings.

Kate looked beautiful.

He can’t stop the words coming out of his mouth and tries to hold in his grin when Kate blushes and rolls her eyes at him.

It’s the night of the Law Ball and their entire friend group is having pre-drinks in the common room before they headed to the college where the ball was being held.

Kate’s wearing a long lavender dress, with a V-neck cut and straps that hang loosely on her shoulders. Her hair is long and wavy down her back and he has to count slowly in his head to stop himself from staring at her.

Anthony didn’t like taking pictures but if they involved wrapping his hand around her waist, pulling her close to him-he’d never complain again taking them for the rest of his life.

Anna insists on getting multiple shots of them together, which takes a few minutes. Anthony swore he saw her wink at him at one point or he was just drunker than he thought.

The ball is brilliant, their entire friend group sits at the same table and he doesn’t remember the last time he laughed so much. They’re all drunk and sloppy, confessing their love for each other and how much they’ll miss each other when they graduate. Anthony spins Kate around the dancefloor and her arms are around his neck, and he wants to stay in that moment forever.

That voice rings in his head.

Kiss her, kiss her, kiss her.

He doesn't kiss her.

“I’ll see you when you get back.”

It was around 4am when they all walked back to their rooms, after a quick stop at McDonalds for some food. Kate had a flight in about five hours and Anthony left their friends to walk her to their room.

Kate’s smile is playful as she hands him back his suit jacket . “Not if I see you first.”

Kate flies to the Netherlands with the botanist society the next morning and Anthony goes home to London. He desperately needed a distraction and his family were the perfect fit. He brought Gregory to football, Hyacinth to swimming and spent the night with all of them while their mother went out with some of her friends.

He couldn’t focus on any of his readings for his lectures.

He couldn't stop thinking about her.

Nothing could distract him from his thoughts. The more he thought about her, the more he realized what an idiot he’d been.

He should have kissed her. He should have kissed at the ball, he should have kissed her in Kent, there were a thousand different times he should have kissed her.

It suddenly clicked. He couldn’t deny it anymore. The final piece of the puzzle.

He was in love with Kate Sheffield.

After the long weekend, he arrived in Oxford after Kate did. He had spent the day having a Sunday roast with his family before driving back to university.

His hands were shaking as he heard of his phone buzz, seeing Kate’s name appearing on his screen.

Kate: i’m back! Where are you?

Anthony: Just parked. Where are you? I’ll come to you

Kate: i’m at the pub! come!

He was going to tell her.

He had to tell her how he felt.

They could make it work.

They had wasted nearly three years not being together.

He didn’t bother going back to his room as he sprinted to their local pub, which was only a five minute walk from their accommodation.

It wasn’t just him. He was sure of it. Right? They had a moment over the summer at Aubrey Hall. There had been so many moments over the years. Kate had always been there for him. They had nearly kissed, they would have kissed if he hadn’t been interrupted. His younger siblings had asked if Kate was coming to visit soon while he went home over the weekend. His family loved her.

He lo-

“Anthony!”

His head flicked around the pub, focusing on the voice that called his name. It belonged to Anna, who was sitting at a table with Rob and Luke. He rushed towards them.

“Hey. Have you seen Kate?”

“She’s busy,” said Anna, the frown on her face evident as she nodded her head towards the bar. Anthony raised a curious eyebrow at her expression before turning around to follow her nod.

Kate was standing with her arms around David, who leans down and kisses her.

He felt something inside of him break.

Kate’s face lights up when she spots him and Anthony manages a smile, ignoring the pain in his chest.

“Anthony!” Kate said, walking towards him with a grin as she wrapped her arms around him to pull him in for a hug. “This is David.”

“I really like him. Please be nice,” Kate whispered in his ear, smiling up at him before taking a step back.

Kate looked so happy.

David grins at Anthony, placing two pints on the table before extending his hand. “Hey mate, nice to meet you.”

He had to remind himself, having Kate was better than not having her at all.

He couldn’t be a dick. He couldn’t push her away.

He swallows the vile taste in his mouth, mustering a smile as he shook his hand. “Hi. Nice to meet you. So, how was the trip?”

He sits there and he listens as they talk about their trip. David is a biologist.

It becomes clear quite quickly David is everything Anthony isn’t.

Anthony hated flowers. Flowers and plants usually meant bees.

“I’ll be right back,” Anthony said, standing up and grabbing his coat as he walked out of the pub. He walks around the side, where there’s no smokers or people chatting. He leans his head against the brick wall and tries to breathe.

He reaches for his phone, sending a text Benedict. He needed his brother. He needs someone. He couldn’t have Kate. His chest was so tight, he was finding is hard to breathe.

“I was wondering where you got off to.”

Anthony’s head snapped up as he saw Kate standing a few inches from him, looking at him curiously. He tries to control his breathing. She looks concerned, walking towards him. “Is everything okay?”

Anthony nodded, trying to relax and he stood up straighter. “Long day with the family. I’m just exhausted.”

He didn’t want to ask, but he did. He had to. “So, how did you two happen?”

The soft smile that breaks out on her face nearly destroys him, but he tries to smile back. “We met at the party, but I didn’t think anything would actually happen. We’ve seen each other at events and meetings for the past few weeks. He’s nice, you know? We have a lot in common. He told me he liked me during the trip and asked me to go to dinner. He bought me flowers. It was sweet.”

Kate had once told Anthony that she was the only person to ever buy her flowers. He had sent them to her every birthday and Christmas since then.

Now he wasn’t.

That was another thing David had taken from him.

“Do you like him?” Kate asked, taking a sip of her glass of water. She looks hesitant as she asks the question and Anthony knows he has to be careful. He doesn’t want to hurt her, none of this is her fault.

He had been wrong about everything.

No. “I suppose. I don’t really know him.”

“Anthony.”

“He seems nice.”

“Why do I bother asking?” Kate teased, taking a sip of her drink. “You don’t like anyone.”

Anthony didn’t miss a beat. “I like you.”

Anthony wanted to bitterly laugh at the irony of it all, but he stopped himself. This wasn’t about him.

Kate rolled her eyes. “I like you too. Seriously, though. It’s important to me that you like him.”

He pretends to look at the group of people ahead of them, just to avoid looking at her. “I want you to be happy. If he makes you happy, that’s all that matters.”

Even if it makes him feel like this.

Kate hesitates, before giving him an affirming nod. “I am.”

He swallows hard. “Good.”

She leans her head against his shoulder, and they stand there in silence. It’s not uncomfortable, it’s just silence.

“We’ll always be friends, right?” Kate breaks it eventually, shaking her head. “God, I sound so childish. I just mean-we’re graduating soon. I know we’re both moving to London. I just-I don’t want us to drift apart.”

Anthony swallows his feelings and shakes his head, smiling playfully at her. “Do you think you can get rid of me, Sheffield?”

“Never, Bridgerton,” She said, laughing at him. It was ridiculous how her smile and laugh made him feel so light and free. He didn’t have the right to feel like that with her. Not like this. “You’re stuck with me.”

“Let's go back inside.”

He can’t sit in there for the next hour and watch them. The thought alone makes him nauseous. “I’m going to head back. I’m shattered and I have some reading to do for the seminar tomorrow.”

Kate looks slightly disappointed, but she musters a smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” They walked to the font of the pub and he smiled as she walked in, turning around to shoot him a smile over her shoulder as she walked in.

He watched her through the window, joining the table where their friends sat. He watched David’s arm wrap around her shoulders and Kate’s head fall back as she laughed at something he whispered into her ear.

She looked happy.

It isn’t because of him.

That’s a particularly hard pill to swallow.

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ninjakasuga · 3 years

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Sonally Celebration Week, Year 3, Day 2: Mystery

Day two has come for the celebration of one of the best furry OTP’s ever~. @gojira007 ‘s celebration blog @boundforfreedomsonsal of Sonic and Sally continues and here’s my second entry. Enjoy all~

Sonsally Week, Year Three!!

Day 02: Mystery

Foreword: This episode is still set in the Archie-Verse depicted in my fics of last year and day one’s story. This one is set some years after the fall of Eggman, when peaceful times finally settled on Mobius for the first time in ages. Of course, peace doesn’t always equate to ‘easy’, especially when babysitting two spirited scamps.

“Sonia, Manic- WHERE THE FREAKING BLEEP ARE YOU?!!” Shouted an irate, and clearly frustrated blue hedgehog as his right eye twitched something horribly. Standing in the town-square of the rebuilt Knothole Village, his gaze shifting back and forth from the trees, and the various huts of the quiet village. While mostly destroyed during one of Dr. Eggman’s devastating attacks; the entire village was rebuilt as it was during the war era of fighting the original Robotnik. With a few Eggman era buildings kept, and one or two new additions. Knothole was mainly a tribute to the village that sheltered the survivors of the fall of the original Mobotropolis, and became home of the resistance that would become the Freedom Fighters. Mostly a standing all-may-come museum to pay homage to the place that started as a Royal Retreat/shelter, but became so much more. A few of the huts were still livable, home away from home for certain members of the Freedom Fighters who occasionally would return to Knothole with their families to celebrate and remember those days.

Today, it was host to a game of hide and seek, giving the two instigators of the game a plethora of hiding places. One that was driving the elder brother of Sonia and Manic Hedgehog, one Sonic the Hedgehog, former hero of Mobius, crazy!

After tapping his foot rapidly for a scant few seconds, Sonic cupped his hands together again and shouted as loudly as he could manage. “MANIC! SONIA! FOR BLEEPING FRACK’S SAKE YOU BETTER GET YOUR BUTTS OUT WHERE I CAN SEE EM’! AIN’T FUNNY NO MORE!” It really wasn’t, Sonic nor his lovely wife, had agreed to hide and seek, but his two younger siblings opted to begin a game without anyone’s consent.

A voice soon called to him, followed by familiar footsteps. “Is there a reason you’re using frack and bleep? Is that a new sibling code of some sort Sonic?”

Speaking of lovely wife’s, there she was. Turning to face his wife, Sonic shrugged with a sheepish expression. “It was censor myself or risk using words I don’t think Mom nor Dad would care for two nine-year-olds to repeat.”

“That is probably for the best.” Agreed Sally, with a tired sigh as a hand went to her rounded stomach. She wasn’t far enough along in her own pregnancy; her movements were not hampered; but the extra weight of the two passengers in her belly was sapping her energy. “Whew, I’ve just been walking but I feel ready to kick back.”

Concerned, Sonic walked over and touched her shoulder. “All the more reason I’m not too happy they started this ‘game’ when I made it clear you can’t be as play-happy as usual because you’re pregnant.”

Shaking her head, Sally reached over to place her hand over his, giving an assuring squeeze as she managed a smile. “They’re just kids, it’s alright Sonic. They probably just want to get some last playtime with us before I’m truly an invalid.”

Sonic had to admit she had a point but his ire was not fully dissolved. “Maybe, but this is still too much. Even Mom n’ Dad told em’ to not get carried away.”

Smirking, Sally lifted an eyebrow as she glanced at her husband. “Sonic, they’re ‘your’ siblings. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. There seems to be an innate sass-o-meter in your family. Pushing buttons seems to be something of a religious doctrine.”

Opening his mouth to counter, Sonic slowly shut it, frowning deeply. “... Fair nuff, but I still say you’ve rubbed off on them if we’re going for sass influence.”

“ME?!” Sputtered Sally, an incredulous frown, forming over her face. Beautiful blue, eyes narrowing almost dangerously. “How pray tell, do I count as a bad influence toward Manic or Sonia?”

Smirking widely as he got her goat, Sonic yanked the chain more, counting off with his fingers. “Well again, you’re the Queen of Sass and not just the Kingdom. When you gotta be right, you will argue til’ the cows come home. Plus you’re good at being playful when you want something, Manny’s baby-of-the-family routine is killer thanks to watching you. N’ Sonia’s all about emulating her Sis-in-law’s fancy mannerisms, and silver tongue. Just the other day she was in trouble and convinced Mom to let her off the hook light with a buncha big words she got from you.”

Almost mirroring Sonic, Sally opened her mouth, then closed it as she thought better of it. “...Touche’, but that doesn’t excuse the bad habits you’ve given them love-of-my-life.”

Laughing, Sonic gave her a big, if careful hug. Letting her have that one as, one it was true, and two, he knew jerking her around too much with hormones a-flame was a bad idea. “Of course, of course, but they also picked up on my coolness factor.”

“Truly…” Replied Sally in a dull, drawl that spoke volumes of how little she believed that. “I just hope our own bundles give us something of a break compared to these two. I can see why your parents are all-too-eager for us to babysit when we can.”

“Knowing us, they’ll drive us insane cuz they’ll be just like us in ways, but we’ll love em’ anyway.” Sonic mused, placing a hand to her belly and leaning in to kiss her gently. Sighing in a content manner, Sally melted into the kiss and hug, feeling a bit of the weight of impending motherhood ease off her shoulders to a degree.

Almost as if on cue, a duo of childish voices are heard uttering, “Eeeew gross!”

Instantly, both Sally and Sonic broke the kiss, angled their heads upward, and pointed as they both cried out in triumphant unison. “AH-HA! THERE YOU TWO SCAMPS ARE!”

“Aw crude!” Muttered Manic, as he and his sister clung to one of the large tree branches, quite a ways up that was connected to one of the tree house type huts.

“Well we gave them the ghost for a good twenty-minutes I’d say we won.” Stated Sonia in a rather faux-haughty manner. The more purple-blue of the two, whipped back her-pink hair? Wait, Sonia was blonde! Plus some of her fur looked more magenta-purple now?

In fact, why was Manic’s fur and quills more of a green-ish tinge than the light-blue they should be? Not to mention that punk-esque quill style... Eyes narrowing, Sonic let go of Sally, zipped into the hollowed out large tree with a hut built around the base. With the same speed, he charged up the ladder within the hollowed out tree, allowing him to come out at the point where the tree-house hut was, and lean out where the landing gave way to a natural, thick tree branch.

“Oh no, you two did not!”

Putting on the best coy, innocent face he could, Manic twiddled his fingers together in a playful manner. “What’re you talking about Big-Bro?”

“Seriously Sonic, you need to use clear, concise words.” Snickered Sonia.

“You both dyed your hair and fur!” Sonic pointed between each sibling. “Mom’s gonna have kittens!” Growled their elder brother as his mind swam with images of a none-too-pleased Bernadette Hedgehog glaring at her son and daughter-in-law.

Arms crossed, Sally tapped her foot, in a manner not unlike her husband. “You two sneaks lost us to go and do the dye-jobs yourself didn’t you?”

“Maaaaaaaaaaaaaybe.” Both twins chorused.

Sighing Sally frowned more. “Manic, Sonia, you do realize your Mother and Father are going to tan the crap out of your hides. They both told you, neither of you could have such radical dye jobs until you were fifteen, thirteen at the earliest if you both proved responsible enough! Plus, Manic, sweetie, why are you intent on making yourself look like Scourge?!”

“Hey!” Manic cried indignantly, a pout forming on his lips. “I just like the color, it’s not my fault Sonic’s scrub of a doppelganger had the same color-job! It screams ‘me’! Plus I don’t have sharp teeth or those evil eyes like he does, plus my quills are cooler lookin!”

“I’ll give you that li’ bro, on the being cooler looking thing, but dam-er dang it!” Sonic grabbed his own head-quills, mussing them up some in frustration. “Urgh Mom n’ Dad ain’t gonna let us watch you two ever again if you pull crap like this again!”

“He’s right.” Sighed Sally, rather dramatically. “We’ll be seen as so irresponsible they will forbid us from ever seeing you again!” She put a hand to her heart, and the other against her head. Truly, piling on the dramatic flair. “They may even question if we’re fit to be parents ourselves and have our babies taken from us.”

While Sonia rolled her eyes, Manic’s went wide as panic took over his earlier nonchalant attitude. “R-really?! We don’t want that!”

“Manny, bro she’s trying to guilt us!”

“Well it’s working! I didn’t wanna get them in that deep of trouble!”

“Manic she’s the QUEEN!! Mom and Dad can’t do jack to her!” His (slighty) older twin argued, seeing her partner-in-crime was about to fold.

“Wanna bet?” Sonic crossed his arms, smirking fully as he saw the sliver of doubt in the two’s eyes. “Mom can be scary when she wants and Dad, Dad is aaaaaaaaaall about the ‘subtle, quiet big stick’ kind of approach.”

Now even Sonia was doubting if they’d gone too far, especially as it pertained to how much trouble this might land her and Manic. Maybe she underestimated her ability to talk her way out of trouble. “M-Maaaybe we got a little carried away?”

“You sure did you two scamps, now if you come with me down the tree, we might ‘might’ convince Mom and Dad to let you both stay the night, and we can wash out the dyes and treat your fur so they never notice.”

Nodding as they both climbed fast, but still safely across the branch to Sonic. The two younger hedgehogs cling onto his legs. “We give, we give!!”

“Smart choice!” Laughed Sally from the ground, smiling at the won tag-team victory of talking the kids into doing their bidding. “If you two behave onward, there might be my special ice cream sundaes after supper.”

“Really?!”

Maybe handling kids wouldn’t be so hard after all? Sally thought before speaking aloud to them. “Cross my heart!”

“N’ you know Sal’s promises are good as gold.” Quipped Sonic as he guided the two once they stood up towards the ladder down to ground level. “Also, expect to help do some chores as further punishment for this stunt.”

“What?! Oh come on big brother-!”

“Nope, nada, don’t even try to talk me down Sonia!” Sonic cut her off as he coaxed first Manic, then Sonia to climb down the ladder. “Sal’s gotta take it easy and I need help doing this and that.”

“But you guys got a staff at the castle to do stuff!” Pipped Manic, his voice echoing through the hollow tree.

“It keeps us honest to do our own chores.” Quipped Sonic, watching them both get halfway before he started down the ladder himself. “Plus if you want us to keep quiet about the dye-thing-.”

“Oh fine!” Both younger hedgehogs huffed, giving up arguing.

“Being a big brother has its perks.” Chuckled Sonic to himself as he made his way down. Maybe in a few years, Sally and he could return the favor and foist their own kids on Manic and Sonia to babysit. Oh the payback will be sweet!

#boundforfreedom #Sonic the Hedgehog #Sally Acorn #Sonally #Sonsal #Archie-Sonic #Manic Hedgehog #Sonia Hedgehog

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deplatform · 3 years

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A very long word vomit about The Traveler’s age because some people still insist that they’re minor or have “minor body” and I’ve had enough

Note: I’m referring to the English voicelines because I don’t have enough understanding of the original Chinese dub. Also, I’m gonna refer The Twins with they/them since either one can be Traveler or Abyss Twin.

It’s pretty much already established from the Archon Quest (Act 1: Chapter IV) that the twins are at least 500+ years so I’m not gonna delve deep into it. Here’s some things people bring out every time The Traveler’s age brought up

Characters’ voicelines about The Traveler being underage

The Traveler’s origin isn’t known to just anyone. Of course there are people who are aware of The Traveler’s origin such as Fischl & Xinyan (from their voicelines) and the Archons. But most people only know The Traveler as “traveler from afar” which is what Amber introduced them as to Kaeya in the prologue.

And even before meeting Kaeya, Paimon only introduced The Traveler to Amber in an ambiguous manner (that they’re lost their sibling in a long journey) and not mentioning anything about another world.

The Traveler also praised Albedo when they first met after he correctly concluded that they’re from another world.

If everyone know that Traveler is not from Teyvat, the above exchange wouldn’t make sense. So it’s safe to assume most people (and NPCs) are just assuming Traveler’s age and not letting them drink, which brings us to the next point.

People won’t let The Traveler drink

Honestly I don’t remember any NPC that forbade The Traveler to drink but I saw some people mentioning Charles? I don’t remember when that happened but in the idle dialogue, he gives The Traveler liquor recommendations

Also since Venti’s and Kaeya’s voicelines are most frequently brought up in this argument I’m gonna bring that up too:

Kaeya, as mentioned before, is assumed to not know about The Traveler’s true origin. Also, in Windblume Festival he offered The Traveler wine (should this indicate that he now knows about The Traveler’s being an alien??? save that for another lore discussion).

Venti’s voiceline is from the middle of the prologue, where he showed no sign of knowing The Traveler’s origin, or at least hide it because Jean and Diluc were also there. Later though, in Zhongli’s voiceline (which took place after the prologue and Liyue arc), Venti apparently gave some alcohol to The Traveler and tricked them into getting drunk.

It’s worth mentioning The Traveler acts annoyed whenever people refuse serving them drinks on multiple occasion yet never tried to correct them. I’ve seen people mentioning that China have laws about this and The Traveler drinking in game would count as “alcohol promotion” which put Mhy at risk of getting banned or having to change the game’s rating (which isn’t good if you want as many players as you can). I can’t verify this because I don’t understand ch law and I’m not spending my time learning about game censorship law in china.

They’re still minor mentally/still have the mind of a minor because they slept in those 500 years

The Twins are immortal beings and can’t age physically. We can see the Abyss Twin (who didn’t sleep for 500 years) still looks the same as before the Unknown God took them away. And how do you know that they’ve only lived for, say, 15 years before sleeping? The Traveler is shown to be mature and capable of making difficult decision like an adult.

Also it’s funny that people mostly bring out the number 15 or 14 from speculating about Mondstat’s drinking age being 16 yo (like Germany irl), even though it’s pretty much confirmed that the drinking age in Mondstat is 18 yo (pictured: Diluc’s 18th birthday bash from the manga)

and finally for the most popular argument:

It doesn’t matter they’re 500 years old, they still have a minor body

1. What the fuck is a minor body 2. Mhy only uses 5 body models and those models are supposed to represent people in a variety of ages. The body models are not indicative of their ages. Not everyone with that model are the same age and not everyone with different models have different ages.

Regarding to characters’ age, I think Fischl is the only one we vaguely know about their age from her vision lore, she’s at least 16 or older (she received her vision at 14 and we know no one has received electro vision in the last 2 years). Noelle explicitly tells us she’s not old enough to drink, while Hu Tao is described to already passed her teenage years. Keqing is one of Liyue Qinxing, you know, people with the highest influence over Liyue’s whole economy and is unlikely to be a teenager. And they ALL have the same model.

3. People who looks younger than they are actually are exist in real life lmao (from being short like me or have baby face)

Also worth mentioning the “we’re only getting dating event with minor characters so The Traveler is minor-coded” argument:

None of those character have confirmed age, let me remind you that body models are not indicative of the character’s age

It’s a hangout event, not “dating event”

You people will lose your mind when future hangout events come lmao (like with Diona or other other characters that doesn’t have young girl/young boy body models)

“I hope Mhy would release official age to make this clear”

I don’t think they’ll do that because The Traveler is a self-insert character. Stating a clear age would make some people relate even less to The Traveler’s character. Even if Mhy eventually gives The Traveler official age, it’d be super old like 1000+ or something (there’s actually a popular theory about the twins actually being 1000+ years old. It’s connected to Honkai Impact’s universe but idk enough about HI3 to talk about it)

And honestly, The Traveler’s age doesn’t matter. Like I said, it’s a self-insert. Which means, people can interpret it as freely as they want. It’s not important to the story progression afterall. Mhy gave us a room for different interpretation by keeping it ambiguous. As long as you don’t attack random people on the internet for thinking differently, you’re good.

Thanks for listening to my Ted Talk.

TL;DR: It doesn’t matter if u think the traveler minor or not, just don’t harass people who think differently. Read the bold parts for details

#just twitter being twitter #if you see a bad with 'dead dove dont eat' written on it just dont eat it!!!!!!!!!!#dont yell at the bag's owner for having a dead dove!!!#tbh its just me going off about pixel lore u can ignore it #with bad grammar #genshin impact

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wellimaginethat · 4 years

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Overprotective

Pairing: Adam Ruzek x (female) Halstead!Reader, Will Halstead x sister!Reader, Jay Halstead x sister!Reader!

Word Count: 3003

Author’s Note: Okay I freaking love this request and this was super fun to write, hope it’s close to what you were looking for dear requester! I know you said if I wanted I could add in a loopy reader, and I did to an extent but I didn’t want to go too overboard with it because every time I’ve been given pain medicine I’ve never been that loopy from it, and I wasn’t entirely sure how to write it without it just being completely bizarre, hope you don’t mind!

Trigger Warning(s): Car accident, minor injury, overprotective older brothers, overprotective boyfriend, pain meds, talk of starting a family (i.e. talk of planned pregnancy, and even though it doesn’t go into detail and no one is actually pregnant, I know it’s a trigger for some people with tokophobia so I want to put it out there just in case because I don’t want to cause anyone any discomfort)

Disclaimer: I don’t owe nor am I affiliated with any of the Chicago shows, I just like to play with the characters

Summary: Y/N Halstead is the youngest Halstead sibling and her older brother’s have always been overprotective, even well into her adult years. She never minded it, but it was definitely the main reason she didn’t tell Jay that she was dating his coworker, Adam. However, when she gets in a car accident and ends up at Med, her relationship with Adam comes to light.

Y/N = Your Name

Being the youngest sibling was one thing, being the only girl was another. It caused you to be a bit of a tomboy growing up, always wanting to tag along with your brothers. You adored your older brothers and they adored you. Both of them were insanely overprotective of you as a child, and that didn’t stop even when you reached adulthood. It also caused you to be one of the most protected little girls in Chicago.

Will was always making sure you kept up on your physical health, going to the doctor when you weren’t feeling good and getting regular checkups.

Jay was always making sure that you were safe, whether it came to where you were living, where you were working, or who you were dating, he was always making sure that it was ‘safe enough’ for you.

This is part of the reason you didn’t tell Jay that you were dating his coworker, Adam. Partly because Jay didn’t think any guy was good enough for you, and partly because you knew of Adam’s track record with women. You just didn’t think Jay would be too thrilled, so you kept it quiet.

You confided in Will, which was an odd thing because usually you told both of your brothers everything and never kept something from one that you told the other.

Will told you to talk to Jay, that he would understand and that Jay only ever wanted what was best for you and for you to be happy. Which you knew was true, but regardless you were extremely worried. So that is what had you keeping your six month long relationship with a certain someone on the down low.

Until you were in an accident. It wasn’t your fault. The lady ran a red light and t-boned you.

You were taken to the hospital in an ambulance, you were insisting you were fine as you were wheeled into the ED. You’ll never forget the look on your older brother’s face when he saw you being wheeled in.

“Y/N?” Will asked worriedly as he rushed over to your side. “What happened?”

“An old lady ran a stop sign and t-boned my car.” You told him before looking at Sylvie. “Is she okay?”

Sylvie smiled at you and nodded. “She’s in the ambo behind you but she seems to be doing just fine, you got the worst of it.”

“Okay good.” You nodded some before looking at your brother. “I’m fine. My head hurts but I’m fine.”

Will shook his head some, he wanted to help you but couldn’t because of the code of conduct, so he stepped back and allowed Dr. Marcel to step in to treat you.

They gave you a shot of some kind of pain medication, you weren’t sure if it was morphine or what but it was good shit and made you feel like you were floating.

You were staring off into space when Will walked in. “Hey, you doing okay?”

“I am doing just peachy keen, dear brother.” You told him with a goofy grin on your face.

Will chuckled and shook his head at you. “Glad to hear it.” He paused and looked at you for a moment.

Your face fell as you looked at him. “You called Jay, didn’t you?”

“I had to.” Will told you. “You know he’d want to know and if I didn’t call him he’d get mad at me and I’m not having that.”

You huffed some and crossed your arms, staring at him. “This is gonna cause problems, William.”

Will laughed at you and shook his head. “It’ll be fine.”

“You know he’s gonna overreact.”

“I assured him that you were okay.” Will told you.

~~~~~

After receiving Will’s call concerning you, Jay was noticeably upset.

“Voight I gotta go, my sister was in a car accident. Will says she’s okay but I need to make sure.” Jay told him, the worry very evident on his face.

Voight just nodded, they weren’t busy with a case so he was fine with Jay going to check on his sister.

“Wait, Y/N was in an accident?” Adam asked, his ears having perked up when Jay mentioned you. “Is she okay?”

Jay gave him a bit of a confused look, not understanding why Adam was so worried about you. “Will says she is but I have to make sure.” He told him as he headed out.

Adam jumped out of his seat, turning to Voight. “I gotta go too.” He told him. “She’s my girlfriend.” He explained when Voight gave him a strange look, turning on his heel and following Jay out. “Halstead, wait! I’m going with you!” He called.

Voight shook his head. “That’s gonna cause problems.” He muttered as he turned to head into his office.

Jay stopped to look at Adam. “Why?” He asked him, not having heard Adam call you his girlfriend.

Adam stopped five feet away from him and rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “Well, we’ve kinda been seeing each other.”

“What?” Jay asked, anger rising. “You’ve been screwing around with my little sister?” He stepped toward him.

Trudy jumped in between him and Adam. “Woah there.”

“It’s not like that!” Adam insisted quickly, holding his hands up in surrender. “It’s really not like that man.”

Jay glared at him, still angry, a fire in his eyes. “Oh? Then what is it like? Are you not sleeping with her?”

“Well, I am.” Adam started, taking a quick step back when Jay stepped forward.

“Hey!” Voight shouted at them.

“We’re not just sleeping together, I love her.” Adam told him honestly. “I really love her.”

Jay huffed and looked from Trudy to Voight before turning and storming out.

“Ruzek.” Voight called after him as he started to follow Jay out.

“I’ll fix it.” Adam told him, not stopping. “Hey man, wait.”

Jay spun to face him. “I wouldn’t come out here, no one’s here to save your ass.”

Adam shook his head. “Listen to me.” He insisted. “Please. I love her. Okay? I love her, completely and I’m not gonna hurt her.”

“You better not.” Jay told him threateningly.

“I’m not gonna.” Adam told him, not backing down. “She’s the one, man.”

Jay stopped and his expression changed some, having been taken off guard. “What?”

“She’s the one.” Adam ran a hand over his face. “I can’t lose her. If something were to happen to her, I don’t think I could live with myself.” He told him honestly. “She’s the one.”

Jay’s expression softened and he nodded slowly. “You love her that much, huh?”

Adam nodded. “I really do.”

Jay sighed and looked away for a moment. “Come on, let’s get to the hospital and make sure she’s okay.” He beckoned Adam to follow him to his truck.

Adam got in the passenger seat.

Jay got in the driver's seat and started the car, pulling out onto the street and heading towards Gaffney. “So how long have you two been together anyway?”

“Almost seven months now.” Adam told him.

Jay nodded as he drove. “She didn’t tell me.”

“She was worried about how you’d react.” Adam explained. “Given my track record and all.”

Jay huffed out a laugh and shook his head. “Of course.” He rolled his eyes some. “So you really think she’s the one?”

Adam nodded. “I know she is. I can’t picture my life without her, and I’m gonna do everything in my power to keep her in it.”

~~~~~

When they got to the hospital, Jay heard you arguing with Will from outside the room. You were upset that Will bothered him, and Will was telling you about how he would want to know.

Jay walked in and wiggled your foot. “Hey brat.” He greeted you with a smile. “Heard you were in a bit of an accident.”

“I’m fine.” You insisted but smiled at him, then your eyes saw Adam waiting inside the door, you cleared your throat. “Officer Ruzek, what’re you doing here?”

“He knows, Y/N.” Adam told you.

You looked at Jay. “You know?” You waited until Jay nodded in confirmation before continuing. “And you didn’t overreact?”

“He did, but Trudy broke it up.” Adam told you. “And then I assured him that I wasn’t gonna hurt you.”

You smiled at him. “Aw, how sweet.”

“She’s a little loopy.” Will told them both. “They gave her some pain meds.”

Adam smiled as he walked over to your side. “So you doing okay?”

You nodded to him. “Uh-huh, I don’t even feel any pain anymore.”

“Good.” Adam said softly, taking your hand in his and kissing the back of it.

“You didn’t have to come all the way here to check on me, I know you were working.” You told him.

“We weren’t busy, plus what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t make sure you were okay?” Adam asked you, still holding your hand.

“You’re such a good boyfriend.” You told him, smiling droopily up at him from the bed.

Jay made a grossed out face and looked over at Will, who was smiling. Both were glad that you seemed happy, even if they were worried about who you were happy with.

“She’ll be here overnight for observation, she had a pretty nasty gash on the side of her head.” Will told Jay, but Adam caught it too.

You began to zone out and Adam nudged your upper arm lightly. “You tired, babe?”

“A little, I think it’s cause of the pain meds they gave me. They’re starting to wear off some, but I’m just so tired.” You told him, yawning after the words were out of your mouth, almost like your body wanted to prove your point for you.

“You should get some sleep.” Adam said softly.

“You should get back to work.” You told him, then looked at Jay. “Both of you should, before Voight gets pissed off.”

“He’ll be fine as long as we don’t kill each other.” Jay grinned at you.

“More like as long as your brother doesn’t kill me.” Adam chuckled a bit.

“Don’t you dare!” You pointed at Jay.

Jay chuckled. “I won’t, I actually believe that he loves you.”

You smiled some, your cheeks turning red. “Yeah, he’s such a good boyfriend. He really is.”

Adam smiled softly down at you, leaning down to kiss the top of your head, making sure not to kiss you near your injury. “Get some rest, I’ll be back as soon as I can be.” He assured you softly.

You smiled tiredly up at him and nodded. “Okie dokie.”

~~~~~

Two months after the accident and you were all healed up, you and Adam were still together and getting more and more serious about each other.

Adam was out getting beers with the team, he followed Jay to the bar when he was getting a beer. “I just want you to be aware that I’m going to ask your sister to marry me tomorrow night.” He told him calmly.

“Oh okay.” Jay stopped and had to do a double take. “Wait, what?”

Adam nodded. “Yeah, I’m gonna ask her. And if she says yes, then this time is gonna be different.”

Jay stared at him for a moment. “You’re actually going to ask her?”

Adam nodded again, taking a swig of his beer. “I told you two months ago that I can’t picture my life without her.”

“I remember.” Jay told him, nodding. “She’s gonna say yes.”

“I sure hope so.” Adam admitted, chuckling a bit. “I’m actually nervous.”

Jay looked at him. “Why? You’ve been engaged before.”

“Yeah, but like I said, this time is different.” Adam told him. “And what if she says no? I mean, I know she’s outta my league and that she deserves better.”

“Then be better.” Jay told him. “It’s that simple man. Be the man you think she deserves.”

Adam looked at him. “I don’t think I’ll ever be the man she deserves, but I’m gonna try.”

“Good.” Jay told him, nodding. “Because I’ve never seen her so happy before.”

Adam smiled. “Really?”

Jay nodded again. “Yeah, she loves you and you make her happy, it’s nice to see.”

Adam nodded some and took another swig of his beer before setting it down. “Screw it.” He said, causing Jay to look at him again. “I’m gonna do it tonight.” He headed out of the bar.

“Where’s he going?” Kevin asked, looking at Jay.

Jay shrugged. “Not sure.” He lied, knowing it wasn’t his place to tell anyone what Adam was up to.

It was a bit before ten when Adam showed up at your door, knocking insistently.

You pulled the door open and looked at him, confused. “Adam? Is everything okay? I thought you were getting drinks with the team?”

He nodded to you, stepping inside and shutting the door behind him. “I was, but I needed to see you.”

You raised a brow. “Why?” You asked slowly, a bit worried.

“Well I was gonna do this tomorrow night at dinner, but I couldn’t wait any longer.” Adam told you, pulling something from the pocket of his jacket and briefly looking at it before dropping to one knee.

You gasp. “Adam, what’re you doing?” You asked quietly, staring at him with wide eyes.

“Y/N Halstead, will you do me the honor of marrying me?” Adam asked you softly, looking up at you.

You couldn’t contain your smile as you nodded. “Yes.” You breathed out. “Yes!”

He stood up, pulling you into a hug and lifting you off the ground, spinning you. The minute your feet were back on the ground he was kissing you. He pulled back and took the ring out of the box, tossing the box aside, and took your hand in his, slipping it on your finger.

You couldn’t stop smiling, tears welling in your eyes.

Adam smiled wide at you and pulled you in for another passionate kiss before pulling back. “Come on.” He said softly. “I wanna tell the world how lucky I am.”

You raised a brow.

“The team’s still at the bar and Will’s there too.” Adam told you. “I think we need to celebrate.”

You smiled and nodded some. “Okay, give me a minute to change, I am not wearing this out.” You motioned to your pajamas.

Adam chuckled and nodded. “Okay, I’ll wait.”

You hurried off to your room and quickly changed before heading out and putting your shoes on, you grabbed your coat and followed Adam out.

You walked into the bar, hand in hand, still smiling.

You immediately spotted your brothers and the two of you walked over.

“Well she said yes.” Adam told them.

Jay smiled. “I knew she would.”

“Wait, you knew?” You asked him.

“What am I missing?” Will asked, feeling left out and confused.

“Adam asked me to marry him.” You told Will, smiling wide. “And I said yes.” You turned your attention back to Jay. “So you knew?”

“He gave me a warning.” Jay told you with a slight shrug, taking a swig of his beer and beckoning Herrmann over. “I’d like to buy these two lovebirds a celebratory drink please.”

Adam ordered a beer.

“Just a sprite for me please.” You told him. “I’m designated driver tonight.”

“One drink won’t hurt.” Jay told you, trying to get you to order a drink.

You shook your head to your brother before turning to Herrmann. “Just a Sprite, please.”

Jay narrowed his eyes at you, watching you. “Is there something you two aren’t telling us?” He asked you skeptically.

Adam caught on to what he was saying and looked at you. “Babe?”

Will looked at you as well.

You laughed and shook your head. “I’m not pregnant guys, I just don’t feel like drinking, okay?”

Jay and Will both nodded and left it at that, but Adam almost seemed disappointed in your answer.

After chatting with your brothers for a bit, you pulled him to the side for a little privacy. “Hey, you seemed disappointed when I said I wasn’t pregnant.” You said softly, looking at him, you two had talked about kids very briefly and you knew he wasn’t ready to have kids yet. “I thought you wanted to wait.”

Adam shrugged some. “I don’t know, I thought I did but I got a little excited at the idea of you being pregnant.” He admitted quietly, not meeting your eyes.

You smiled softly. “Really?”

He nodded to you, finally looking at you. “I know I want a family with you, Y/N. I thought I wasn’t ready but I am, whenever you are.”

You smiled and kissed his cheek. “We’ll talk more about this when we get back to my place.”

“That’s another thing we need to talk about. We’re engaged now so I think we should live together.” Adam told you.

You paused before nodding. “Okay.”

“And my place is bigger, in case, you know, we do decide to start trying soon.” Adam added.

You smirked some. “I think you just don’t want to be the one moving.”

Adam smiled a bit. “I really like my place.”

You laughed softly and nodded. “Don’t worry, I’ll move in with you.” You assured him softly, you really had no problem with moving into his place instead of yours, he was right when he said it was bigger, and it was closer to where he worked and actually to where you worked too, so it only made sense.

He wrapped his arm around your shoulders and led you back towards your brothers, who had been joined by Hailey and Kevin. Adam smiled at them. “So guess who’s getting married.”

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” Kevin teased him, chuckling but putting his hand out to shake Adam’s hand. “Congrats, man.”

Adam shook his hand, still smiling. “Thank you.”

Hailey hugged you. “Congratulations.” She told you with a smile.

“Thanks.” You had never felt happier than you did in that moment.

#adam ruzek x reader #adam ruzek imagine #adam ruzek imagines #chicago pd imagine #chicago pd imagines

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sargeantwoof · 3 years

Text

Well, I Got This Suit of Armor and A Sword I Need to Swing

Hotch has begun to express how much he cares about his team, like, physically.

They are... confused. ((and mildly delighted))

***

The first time it happens, no one realizes it until after Hotch leaves the bullpen, rushing off to pick Jack up from Jessica.

Spencer turns to Morgan, words spilling from his mouth until he pauses, his hand raised halfway to his hair. Emily, JJ, and Rossi immediately look up, all familiar with the way a sudden silence from Spencer normally signifies a break in the case.

Instead, he gently cards his hand through his ruffled curls and goes, "I think Hotch kissed me on the way out the door."

The next time it happens, it's to Garcia.

She's been busy, filtering through search after search with a massive pool of suspects. She knows she's close, knows it the same way she knows how to code, how to knit, how to pull something from nothing.

She standing in the tiny kitchenette, only the dim lights from Hotch's office and the BAU's briefing office lighting the way when she hears someone come down the steps. She turns, hoping it's Morgan, wanting some reassurance. Instead, it's Hotch, his face drawn and wane, as he heads for the coffee pot next to her.

"Garcia," he greets quietly, his eyes on his drink as he pours hours old coffee into his mug.

Garcia offers a weak smile. "Sir," she says. The two stand in the quiet for a moment, Hotch's eyes on his drink, and Garcia's eyes on him. She shifts eventually, as Spencer and Emily pass by in the office window, casting deeper shadows across the room. "Sir- I just- I want you to know that I'm trying, sir, it's just - these parameters and the pool," she says, gesturing, her bracelets clinking softly on her wrist. "I want to find them, and I know- I know! I'm close," she finishes before turning back to her tea, her eyes lowered.

Hotch reaches out, gently touching her shoulder. "Garcia," he says softly. "Penelope," he amends. "I know," he says. "We wouldn't be able to find nearly as many killers and abductors if it wasn't for your work." He shifts closer to her. "I've never doubted your ability to find out what we need."

"Oh God," Garcia says, her stomach knotting. "I feel like you've just sent me up to fail."

Hotch chuckles softly, the sound so out of place that Garcia freezes. "No," Hotch says, dropping his arm to press an absentminded kiss to the top of her head. "Now, I believe in you so, please, find me our guy." He turns and heads up the stairs, his gait steady and even, completely unchanged.

Garcia blinks after him, pushing her glasses up her face before pressing her fingertips to her cheeks. "Oh my god," she whispers, alone in the room. "Hotch just kissed me too."

***

When Garcia hands out the folder and begins reading the case to the group, JJ pauses. She sees it a split second before Garcia says it, the words he's killing siblings of those who had committed suicides, ringing around her head for a long moment before she tears her eyes away and looks up.

Everyone in the room is either very studiously not looking at her or staring straight at her. Only Hotch looks up in the pause and turns to JJ. "Take a minute before we go," he says, not unkindly but firmly. "This is going to be difficult for all of us, and I need everyone's head in the game."

JJ nods, her mind spinning. She's silent the rest of the meeting, only getting up when she registers the others rising as well. She turns from the room, heading out on autopilot. It's only when she realizes that she's in a dark and quiet place that she allows herself to take in the case.

The victim's faces stick in her mind - the original victims - the suicides - as her brain catches on them over and over again until their faces have become Roslyn, layered over each other in an almost horrific amalgamation of projection. Her mind sticks on the dates as well, so close to her anniversary, days away from when JJ would go to the graveyard and visit her older sister, bringing her Queen Anne's Lace, because even though Ros had been allergic they were her favorite.

She takes in a deep breath, closing her eyes and giving herself a minute to center her mind. She is calm, she is cool, she is collected. She breathes out, blinking her eyes open and taking in the room she had instinctively retreated to. Her old office comes into focus, stacks of miscellaneous folders and cardboard boxes surrounding her.

Behind her, someone knocks softly on the doorframe.

"Come in," she says, her voice quiet.

Hotch enters, his stride familiar. "You okay?" He asks in a murmur. JJ nods, still facing away from him. He shifts his weight, his clothes rustling with the movement. He reaches out for her, just as she turns, his hand heavy on her shoulder until he raises his other hand and places it on her other shoulder. She pauses, a flicker of something in his gaze that makes her hesitate before Hotch tugs her in closer to him. "We'll get him," he promises, his hands sliding up to her face before he tilts her head forward and pulls her into him even tighter.

JJ burrows into his circle of arms, tension sliding from her frame as her brain registers the tiny space of safety Hotch is offering. He brushes a kiss across her cheek before letting go, all traces of openness wiped from his face. "Come on," he says. "Wheel's up in twenty."

***

"Hotch," Morgan says, his voice low and warning. "I don't want to have to do this."

"Then don't," Hotch says quietly, his gaze on the folders in front of him as the plane banks sharply.

Morgan sighs, reaching out to halt his tablet from sliding across the table in front of them. The plane is dark around them, Spencer passed out on the couch across from them, Emily and JJ asleep next to each other, their heads tilted together. At the front of the plane, Rossi sits, staring out the window. Morgan sighs again and turns to face Hotch more squarely, angling himself so he can see the man sitting next to him better.

"It just doesn't feel right," he says.

"Well," Hotch says, lifting his gaze to meet Morgan's. "If it doesn't feel right, then don't do it."

"But -"

"But what?" Hotch interrupts, arching a brow. "The first thing we're taught on this team is to follow our instincts." He stares at Morgan, setting the file down. "So what are they telling you?"

"They're telling me it's a stupid idea to try - to try to even explain myself," Morgan says, almost snapping. "I don't want to have to fight it out every time I see my family."

"Okay," Hotch says evenly. "What does feel right then?"

Morgan shrugs, a helpless look on his face. "I don't know," he admits. "I'm just confused."

Hotch quirks a gentle smile at him. "I understand," he says. "It's hard to get even when you're in the thick of it."

Morgan nods rapidly. "And - I just -" he heaves a sigh. "You guys are my family." He blinks, leaning back his seat, staring at the ceiling. "I don't know what to do."

For a long moment, the two of them are silent until Hotch sighs. "I know you'll figure it out," he says softly. "You always do." Morgan closes his eyes, his feelings swirling in his chest. So lightly, he almost thinks he imagines it, he feels Hotch press a kiss to his cheek before turning back to his paperwork. "I believe in you," Hotch murmurs. "Just do what's best for you."

***

Emily blinks at Hotch as she stands in the doorway of his office. "Hi," she says. "Can we talk?"

Hotch looks up at her over his paperwork before gesturing for her to sit down. "Yeah," he says. "What's up?"

"Uh, I just-" She turns and shuts the door, the latch clicking behind her. "Does-" She cuts herself off, sighing and sliding down into the seat. Hotch furrows his brows at her before rising and coming around his desk, sinking into the chair next to her. She sighs again, a short burst of harsh air. "Do you talk to your father?" She asks abruptly, a strange look on her face.

"Well," Hotch says after a beat. "He's dead, so no."

"Oh," Emily says, her voice dropping. 'I'm so sorry, Hotch, I had no idea."

Hotch offers her a small smile. "It's not something I mention much," he admits, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. The room is silent for a beat before he narrows his eyes at her. "Why?"

"Oh, uh," Emily begins before sighing for the third time. "I just - I wanted to talk to you about something but I don't quite know where or how to begin."

"And you thought you'd start by asking about my father?" Hotch asks, arching an eyebrow.

Emily shrugs, quirking half her mouth up in a half-smile. "Wasn't a very smart move for a profiler, was it?" She says. "But no, I uh, I wanted to know if you would've made the same call as me tonight."

Hotch dips his head, running over the case in his mind, laying out all the facts - she had been cornered, at a clear disadvantage, with a gun held on her, and had made the judgment call to signal for a sniper to take the unsub out, rather than talking him down. He inclines his head in a quick nod.

"Yes," he says, cocking a brow at her. "Yes, I would've."

Emily sighs, tension sliding from her frame. "There just- there was something about his face," she says softly. "I thought I was going to die, for real, and I thought I panicked." She blinks at him, rising to her feet. "I - thank you."

"No," Hotch says, standing with her. He steps close, and pulls her into a hug, pressing a kiss to her hair above her ear. "You aren't dying on my watch." He tightens his grip on her before relaxing and pulling away, his face as fond and open as it got in the office. "You made the right call," he says, letting her go but keeping eye contact with her. "The correct call."

Emily grins at him, relief making her expression fierce. "Good," she says, striding to the doorway. "I'd hate to leave you all in the lurch," she says, wiggling her fingers at him. "Come out and get drinks with us."

"Okay," Hotch says after a beat, shutting the folder closed on his desk with a snap. "Lead the way then."

***

With Rossi, it's not a surprise to anyone.

They're drunk at his house, properly drunk, too many glasses of Emilys' infamous punch in, when Rossi decides that he needs to cook them a meal. He sits them down around his counter, pulling out pots and pans, their low chatter a welcome noise in the background.

He points a wooden spoon in Spencer's direction menacingly, at his low question of what the hell are all these for, before shaking his head. "It's like none of you have ever seen a real chef in the kitchen."

"Well," Spencer says, blinking slowly at him. "I drink coffee and eat stuff, so -" He blinks again, turning to Emily. "I eat those donuts."

She pats him on the shoulder. "And you do it so, so, well," she says, grinning at him when he hums in her direction, his attention back on watching Rossi.

Morgan chuckles from beside him, reaching out and nudging Garcia from where she's slumped over the counter. "C'mon babygirl, don't you want to watch the man work his magic?"

"Magic?" Spencer says, spinning to look at Morgan and getting up to find his bag. "Do you want to see magic?"

"Aw, hell," Morgan says, following Spencer from the kitchen. "That's not what I meant Pretty Boy!"

JJ leans further into Emily, her face open and fond. "We should do this more often," she says, rubbing her cheek against Emily's shoulder. "I've missed this kind of de-stressing."

Emily smiles down at her, tugging her even closer before looking over JJ's shoulder at Hotch. "You okay over there?" She asks, her grin blooming even brighter when Hotch turns to look at her with vaguely unfocused eyes.

"Yeah," Hotch says, pulling his gaze away to go back to watching Rossi at the stove. "I'm trying to see the chef."

Rossi laughs loudly from in front of the stove, striding around the counter and planting a loud smacking kiss on Hotch's lips. "And now you have," he says patting Hotch on the shoulder and heading back to the stove. "The food will be ready in twenty," he says, ignoring the looks from JJ and Emily who are alternating between staring at him and at Hotch.

Hotch blinks at him for a moment before smiling and letting himself slide deeper into his seat, taking a long sip from his cup of punch.

"Oh-" Garcia says, her face propped up in her hands as she flutters her eyes at the group in the kitchen. "I fucking love you guys." From the room over, Spencer and Morgan burst into laughter, the sounds of a deck of cards exploding accompanying them. Garcia sighs deeply, lines of contentment etched into her face. "No," she says earnestly, as the others around her begin laughing too, as a deep swell of contentment rises within the home. "Seriously. Love you all forever."

#criminal minds #cm #can be read as poly!bau #aaron hotchner #spencer reid #derek morgan #emily prentiss #david rossi #jennifer jareau #jj #fanfic #they are all FRIENDS #and I LOVE them #ao3fic

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redhoodssweetheart · 4 years

Text

Benched

Genre: Angst and Fluff

Relationship: Dick Grayson x Gender Neutral!Reader

Requested: Yes (REQUESTS ARE CLOSED)

Word Count: 1.4K

Warnings: Swearing, blood (gun shot and knife wound), angst

Description: You get injured while on a mission and don’t tell anyone. It isn’t until you’re shot that Dick realizes the extent of your injuries.

You and Dick were currently with the Titans working missions. They were having problems with Slade Wilson and Kori had called for backup. The two of you were more than happy to help out an old friend with her problem. Damian hadn’t been exactly thrilled when the two of you showed up. He saw you both as older siblings encroaching on his territory, plus he didn’t want the two of embarrassing him in front of his crush.

Right now you were engaged in a fight with some of Slade’s henchmen. You had gotten a tip that a deal was about to go down and the team had headed out to stop whatever Slade was preparing to do. The Titans were spread thin, but handling the situation well all things considered.

You were fighting against a masked guard when another came up behind you and stabbed you in the side. You cried out in pain, but whirled and kicked the man away from you. Pulling the knife from your side, you gritted your teeth, “Ow.” Looking up you saw the other guard coming at you with his sword raised ready to strike.

Dick appeared and kicked the guards feet out from underneath him. You quickly hid the knife stained with your blood as Dick turned to look at you, “You good?”

You nodded, “I’m fine, go help the others. I can handle things here.”

Dick seemed light he wanted to stay because he didn’t believe you, but the sounds of the fighting drew his attention back to the others. You continued to fight, blood trickling from the wound in your side. There was another guard coming at you, but instead of knives or a sword he merely held up a gun and pointed it at you.

You heard someone shout your code name and heard the gun fire. Time moved slowly for a moment, what took only a matter of seconds seemed to take ten minutes. You felt the bully tear through your shoulder leaving behind a burning pain. You crumpled to the floor crying out as you landed on your now injured shoulder.

Someone was dragging you away, possibly Dick, leaving a trail of blood as he did. You could barely hear him cursing when he noticed your first injury. “Starfire!” He shouted. “We need medical attention ASAP.”

You couldn’t hear Starfire’s response over the ringing in your ears, there was too much going on and your mind was having trouble processing it. You thought you heard Dick talking to you, begging you to stay awake for him, but the darkness had its hands on you and was tugging you toward unconsciousness. You passed out before the others could get you out of the building.

Dick paced beside your bed, you were still unconscious, but the doctor believed that you would make it through. He said that you were a fighter and that if they had waited any longer there would be no more you gracing the earth. That had scared Dick more than anything. What had you been thinking about lying to him like that?

How had he not seen that you had been injured before being shot? Didn’t you know that that put you in more danger than it was worth?

Kori entered the room with a tray of food and water, “You should eat.”

He looked at her and she could see the redness around his eyes, the scared look in them. He had almost lost you and he was more than likely beating himself up because of it. “How could Y/N have been so stupid? If they were injured then they should have told me!”

Kori set the tray down and went over to wrap her arms around Dick, “Y/N knew how important this mission was. They probably didn’t want to distract you from it especially when we were already out numbered. They knew the risks and they were willing to keep fighting despite those.”

He sighed knowing that Kori was right, you knew the risks and you wouldn’t have wanted to risk the team having any sort of distraction like being injured. “I’m still mad.”

“And that’s fine, but don’t go too hard on Y/N when they wake up,” Kori pulled away and offered a sympathetic smile before leaving the two of you alone.

Dick resumed his spot on the chair beside your bed and spoke, “You better wake up soon, Y/L/N. What am I going to do without you? Who’s gonna help me torture Damian about his crush on Raven? Who’s gonna make all those stuffy galas that Bruce throws better?” He let out a chuckle, “Remember that time when we were teens when you had Tim hack into the sound system and played Cotton Eyed Joe on repeat? That was a good one even if Tim and I were grounded for a month, and we couldn’t see you either.” He brushed a finger against your arm, his smile fading. “I also hope you know that I am so benching you for this.”

“Wouldn’t expect anything less,” you groaned as your eyes slowly opened and a small smile graced your lips. “How much trouble am I in?”

Dick closed his eyes and let out a slow breath in relief. When he looked back at you he couldn’t help but kiss the palm of your hand. “So much trouble, but right now I’m just happy you’re awake and talking.”

“You know you would have done the same thing, Dick. And if memory serves me correct you have,” you pointed out. “So you can’t get too mad at me.”

“I can be as mad as I want,” he pouted, making you grin at him which in turn made him grin at you. It had always been like this between the two of you. You two would do anything for one another and you understood why he was mad because you had been when he risked his life like you had as well.

“I am sorry for worrying you,” you told him, your face becoming serious. “It’s just that we were outnumbered and I didn’t want to draw anyone away from their fights all because I had been stabbed. I probably would have been fine if that bastard hadn’t shot me.”

There was a moment of silence as the two of you relieved that moment, Dick didn’t think he would ever get the image out of his head. “It’s in the past now, but I’m serious. You’re benched until you’re healed and maybe a little after that because I’m not going to have you risking your life again.”

“All right, all right you’ve made your point tough guy,” you sat up and winced some as your two injuries were disturbed. “How’s everyone else? Did anyone else get hurt?”

“Just a few bruises, nothing permanent. They’re all dying to see you,” he confessed. “Even Damian.”

“I knew the demon spawn liked me,” you said.

“I heard that!” Damian shouted through the door. Both you and Dick looked over as the door was pushed open to reveal the rest of the Titans standing out there looking guilty.

“Kori?” Dick groaned. “Even you?”

She gave the two of you a sheepish look, “I was going to stop them, but… well we were curious to see what was being said.”

They piled into your room leaving balloons and flowers for you. You took them all graciously and thanked them for their gifts. Damian sat on the side of the bed and looked a bit awkward as he tried to come up with what he wanted to say and how he wanted to say it. “I’m… I’m glad you’re not dead Y/L/N. We would have lost a valuable member to the team if you had perished in the fight.”

You grinned widely at Damian and pulled him into your arms while he tried desperately to get out of your grasp, “I knew you loved me!”

“Let me go!” He managed to squirm away from you and straightened his clothes. “You're on thin ice, Y/L/N.”

You snorted, “Love you too, Damian.”

Raven slung her arm around his shoulders and you and Dick swore his cheeks were growing the slightest bit red, “Come on, let’s go get something to eat now that you know they’re okay.”

The rest of the Titans finished their well wishes and left you alone. “I should go too, you still need your rest,” Dick said as he stood to leave.

You grabbed his hand, “Please stay.”

He hesitated not sure if he should because he didn’t want to cause you any discomfort, but giving in he crawled into bed beside you. You got comfortable, resting your head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around you protectively. “Love you,” he murmured.

You smiled and murmured, “Love you,” back.

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jayfrost-designs · 3 years

Photo

This is also from December of last year.

I've had a new idea in my head for Darkstripe for a while now, and after getting all those other ref sheets that I needed to do done, I decided to run with it. You may have noticed a change in the name of his father in his bio. Don't worry about that just yet. I'll get to it after talking about the design.

The reverse side of his design can be seen here.

On his wiki page, Darkstripe is described as a large, lean, sleek, and thin-furred tom. I misread the "thin-furred" part of his description as "thick-furred" when I started designing this, so he ended up with a rather thick pelt. Oops. My explanation/excuse for this is that the thin-furred description comes from his appearance as a Dark Forest cat, so as a living cat he had sleek, thick fur, but after dying he started going all patchy and ragged and his fur started to get pretty thin in places. So that's my half-baked excuse for that. I went pretty free-hand with this design, but he's mostly based on Turkish Vans, and is meant to be decent-sized and muscular, with a thick mediumish pelt. He has a smaller version of his mother's ear tufts and a decent amount of scars, since he was always pretty aggresive.

For his pattern, Darkstripe is described as a dark gray tabby tom with black stripes and yellow eyes. I completely changed his design from his old one and went for a smoke tabby look for him this time around. His black stripes don't stand out as much as on his old design since the rest of the pelt is darker now, but they're still there, and he's overall a very dark-looking cat, so Dark- fits him well as a prefix. I played around with his design a lot before I was happy with it, but I'm really happy with the end result. ^^ I came up with a fresh shade of yellow for his eyes as well. ^^

Now for the fun part. Since Tawnyspots is no longer listed as his father on the official family tree, I decided to come up with a new headcanon for who his father is. I considered a few cats from ThunderClan at first, but none of them seemed to fit. But then I had a really interesting idea for his father - and for the reason he's a smoke tabby. I'll explain everything below - starting with Willowpelt's story. Apologies in advance for the length. ^^

~-~-~

As a young cat, Willowpelt gets lonely sometimes. Her sister is busy training to be a medicine cat, and Redtail throws himself into his warrior duties so much that he doesn’t spend as much time with her as either of them would like. She doesn’t begrudge either of them their ambitions - she knows Redtail wants to be the best warrior he possibly can (and later has his eye on the deputyship), and Spottedleaf will make an amazing medicine cat. But she doesn’t share their ambitions. She’s always been a much more relaxed cat, content to do her duties as a warrior, but not pushing beyond that, preferring to spend her time racing through the forest on the wild excitement of the hunt, and spend lazy days sunning in the grass, rather than busying herself with constant patrols and duties.

So while her siblings are busy with their work, Willowpelt seeks out companionship elsewhere. She’d always been curious about twolegplace, hearing stories about how their last leader had left to live there, and decided to check it out one day. She doesn’t find Pinestar - but she does find some friendly kittypets who welcome the visit of a real wild Clan cat. She continued to visit occasionally over the moons, whenever she’s feeling particularly lonely. She’s never swayed by the thought of becoming a kittypet herself - she loves her Clan, and her freedom, too much - but she’s happy to visit her kittypet friends whenever she can.

She grows particularly close with a sleek, handsome smoke tom called Sparky. A few moons later, she finds herself expecting the tom’s kits. The two aren’t in love, and Sparky rejects Willowpelt’s offer to join ThunderClan and help raise the kits, but it’s all very amicable and the two remain on close terms. Willowpelt is perfectly happy to raise her kits alone. She later gives birth to a single tom, Darkkit, who looks remarkably like his father. The Clan gossips a little about who the father could possibly be (Willowpelt covers her tracks visiting Twolegplace better than Featherstorm had), but overall they’re just happy to have another kit after the nursery has been empty so long, since White-eye’s last litter.

Willowpelt plans to tell Darkkit about his parentage when he’s old enough, but the young tom grows bitter after moons of some of the stricter cats whispering about his unknown parentage, and the loneliness of being the only kit in the nursery. Willowpelt always assures him that there’s nothing wrong with him and is a fiercely loving mother, but her laidback attitude about borders and rules bothers him - other warriors take these things seriously, so shouldn’t she? A kernel of doubt begins to weed its way onto Darkkit’s mind - what if Willowpelt won’t tell anyone who his father is because his father doesn’t want him? What if it was because he isn’t good enough to be this mystery tom's son? Willowpelt longs to comfort her son that his father does care and does want to be part of his life, but she’s not sure he’s old enough to understand the truth about his father, so she waits.

With all this doubt and bitterness swirling inside him, it’s no surprise that upon becoming an apprentice, Darkpaw immediately attaches himself to the first cat who seems ready to take him seriously and see some potential in him - his new mentor Tigerclaw. To Darkpaw, Tigerclaw is everything a warrior should be. He has the strength of TigerClan, the courage of LionClan, and is the wisest, most loyal warrior in the entire Clan in the young tom’s eyes. He can’t believe his luck in snagging such a skilled and brave warrior as his mentor, and quickly learns to worship the ground Tigerclaw walks on. A secret part of his heart wonders whether Tigerclaw is his father. They both have dark tabby pelts and fur that grows darker at the points, and while Darkpaw isn’t nearly as tall and long-furred as the older tom, he’s still broader and taller than his mother, and could have inherited that from Tigerclaw. He works tirelessly to mold himself after Tigerclaw’s image and takes all of his training to heart - including his views on loyalty and cats from outside of the Clan.

Willowpelt had intended to tell Darkpaw about his father a moon or so into his training, but the longer he trained with Tigerclaw, the more disdainful he grew of cats outside of the warrior code, especially kittypets. She worries about how much the tom has changed, but he doesn’t seem willing to listen to her anymore, so there’s little she can do to curb Tigerclaw’s influence on her son. She resolved to continue hiding the truth of his father, as Darkpaw is probably happier not knowing the truth, and resolves to keep an eye on her son. It’s not all bad, she assures herself. Tigerclaw has taken the fatherless tom under his wing just as Thistleclaw had done for him, and he seems genuinely proud of his young apprentice - in his own stoic way - and is molding him into a strong warrior. As long as Darkpaw is happy, that’s what matters - right?

Though Darkpaw, then later Darkstripe definitely grows more scornful of others and more conceited over the moons, Willowpelt tries to stay optimistic. He’s a bit of a jerk, yes, but otherwise he seems like a perfectly loyal and happy warrior. But that illusion starts to chip away little by little after Tigerclaw’s exile as Darkstripe continues to show an unhealthy attachment to such a traitor, and then comes crashing down completely the day that Darkstripe tries to poison his own half sister. Unbeknownst to the rest of the Clan, Willowpelt sneaks out after Darkstripe as he’s departing the territory for his exile.

Rage and heartbreak bubble under her pelt in equal measures as she faces her eldest son. Something inside of her is wailing at the loss of the son that she’d loved, and her failure to protect him from becoming this, but the rest of her feels an icy calm. She faces Darkstripe, coldly informing him that if he’s fool enough to follow Tigerstar on his rampage against “impure” cats, then he’d better hand himself over as well for being impure. He’s the very thing that he’s always hated, the thing that he has been relentless in mocking Firestar for being - he’s half kittypet. Darkstripe flies into a rage, shrieking that it isn’t true, it can’t be true, that Willowpelt never loved him and is just lying to make him doubt himself. He tries to attack his mother, but she dances out of range, still glaring at him with icy calm while her heart continues to wail its pain inside of her. She tells him that she loved him with all of her heart, and that if he’d let go of his bitterness and his unhealthy devotion to an admitted traitor long enough he would’ve seen that, but that now it’s too late. She’ll always love him, but she will never forgive him for what he’s done to her daughter. She leaves him there on the border between ThunderClan and TigerClan. He hesitates, but only for a moment. Then he slips into TigerClan territory.

Unfortunately, Darkstripe’s reception at the TigerClan camp is chillier than expected. It was true that Tigerstar had once felt genuine pride and companionship for Darkstripe as his apprentice and as a fellow warrior. He’d always known that Darkstripe was a bit of a suck-up, but he was still strong and a powerful warrior in his own right, and Tigerstar had been proud of the efforts of his first run as a mentor. However, his opinion of Darkstripe had lessened after the tom refused to follow him into exile, and had dropped even more sharply after one of his Twolegplace allies had told him about a smoke kittypet who’d mentioned being friends with forest cats. Tigerstar had taken the chance to spy on the kittypet from a tree one day, only to be shocked at the sight of a cat nearly identical to Darkstripe.

After that, Tigerstar had put together the pieces and realized that Darkstripe was the son of a kittypet. He tells Darkstripe as much when he arrives in TigerClan, glaring down at the groveling tom with a sneer. That kittypet blood has tainted him with weakness, he claimed, weakness that had kept him from following Tigerstar into exile, that had made him fail again and again at Tigerstar’s commands as his spy, and that had made him fail at the simple task of killing one insignificant little kit. Darkstripe quivers before the tom, protesting that it couldn’t be true, though with Tigerstar’s account of the smoke kittypet, he’s starting to realize that it must be. He wails that he’d never known, that Willowpelt had hidden it from him, that she is the true traitor. He didn’t care who his father was, he whimpers - his loyalty was to Tigerstar, it had always been to Tigerstar, and it always would be.

Tigerstar watched the sniveling display with disdain. The tom was undoubtedly tainted by the weakness of his blood, but he’d always shown devotion to Tigerstar. Perhaps he could be given one last chance - but only one. He tells the tom that if he is ever to be anything but the sniveling son of a kittypet, he must prove himself willing to eradicate any disloyalty in the new Clan and pledge himself entirely loyal. He considers ordering the tom to hunt down his kittypet father and slay him, or to sneak into ThunderClan territory and kill his treacherous mother. But there are more pressing concerns facing his Clan right now, and he can’t have one of his warriors off on some lengthy mission to get one well-guarded cat alone when TigerClan is on the verge of conquering the other Clans. Such tests of his loyalty can come later. For now, perhaps a simpler task will do. He still needs someone to take care of those halfClan prisoners after all...

Of course, Darkstripe fails in that task too, and Tigerstar’s rage at yet another failure from his half-kittypet lackey is fearsome to behold. It is only the need for every fighting warrior available for the battle to come that keeps Tigerstar from punishing Darkstripe more severely. A worse fate may have awaited Darkstripe after the battle’s end, had Tigerstar not fallen under Scourge’s claws. And yet, Darkstripe continues his nearly obsessive devotion to the cat he still thinks of as his true father, even if he isn’t a father by blood, and he ends up dying in his quest to avenge the murderous tom. And yet, even a death in service to Tigerstar isn’t enough to truly raise him in the tom’s eyes, and he spends his seasons in the Dark Forest being overshadowed by a Tigerstar’s true sons, until the end of the Dark Battle leaves him to wander alone in the darkness forever.

~-~-~

Anyway, that’s my mini-essay on Darkstripe’s father and life story. XD Overall, I'm really happy with how his design turned out, and I had a lot of fun coming up with his parents' story and his story in regards to thinking of Tigerstar as his father. I also like how silhouette-wise, he looks a fair bit like Graystripe, but their patterns make them decently distinct from each other.

#Warriors #Warrior Cats #Erin Hunter #WC #Darkstripe #Darkpaw #Darkkit #ThunderClan #Rogue #ShadowClan #RiverClan #TigerClan #The Prophecies Begin #The Dark Forest #Dark Forest #Place of No Stars #Kittypet

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