#their personalities just mesh ok they mesh

[kittysauce]

I forgot tomention this in the last post but i am the drdt rarepair MASTER u guys

#OK LETS GET DOWN THE LIST. #charturo #veronarei #davewhit #nicomin #OK LET ME EXPLAIN. #charturo . Both rlly mean and also the homoerotic argument scene they had cmon #veronarei . BATSHIT WOMEN !!!!!! they r both just cray cray okay #davewhit that one comic thats it #nicomin ok i DONT have a proper explanation for this one its just :]]]] ya !!!!! #SORRY OK IM SORRY i know half of them havent interacted but just!!!! #their personalities just mesh ok they mesh #davewhit veronarei and nicomin are all courtesy to my friends hi guys #ik violets here hi vi #I like acevi a LOT but ijts not a rarepair so im not talkinf ab it 🤨🤨🤨

[aeriedwelling]

apotheosis is so hard to watch but im tryin

#aerie chatter #girl it's. they keep talking over each other #and the party keeps beating each other up #and character personalities don't mesh well?? #and like. they spend half a session just talking about things they've BEEN talking about for like THREE SESSIONS #and peter and rumi go on tangents forever and thanatos doesn't do anything for like entire sessions at a time #the rock gifting thing is cute. and peter/rumi strangers to friends to lovers is cute. #but aaaaugh. this is. raaaar im trying. head in hands i am trying so hard. #it's giving the fated and that was PAINFUL to sit through. i keep zoning out. #raaaaarrrrr. ok. we're goin we're doin this. babababababab

[lockandkeyhyena]

well. first day back at school was a fucking disaster

#i made a kid run crying out of the room because i said i didnt like them #ALL I SAID was that im not making a moral judgement on them. i dont think theyre a bad person. i just dont like them personally and i dont #think me mesh well together #i EMPHASISED that part #keep in mind this is after they randomly started extoling the virtues of cryptocurrencyto me #and how theyve made alot of money off it #and how it can be healthy for the enviroment because of solsr panels or whatever #and before that the class was doing a task wrong and i TOLD them they were doing itwrong and i POINTED OUT the evidence of that #and they were like. No. We’re doing it right. really shortly to me #so once the crypto thing started i was like. ok i cant take this anymore #and i just told them that and they burst out fucking crying??????? idk what i did wrong?????? #i SAID i wasnt passing a moral judgement but idk if they believed me??? why would ilie about that????? #also why do they care what i think???? its just easier to get everyones emotions to the forefront right? #i. idk what i did. #also the class only has 3 other people so yay. going to have to deal with that #yeen rambles

[oscill4te]

Manifesting that this group hang out thing goes okay todayy

#im so nervous abt it i feel like theres so much liability for it to fall apart lol #and the inner control freak in me is pacing around and another part of me wants to freeze and do nothing #good that i woke up early at least #its hard cuz everyone seems to want to do different things and theres a chance ppl may opt out and. aaaa. #someone wants to go to the mall. me and 1 person wanted to do an escape room. another wants to go to this grunge clothing shop in the city #some want to drink. some dont. some want to drink at a bar some want to drink at our place to save money #u see what i meannnn. aaaagh #i just hope everyone vibes and is okay with whereever this planless hang out takes us #im personally ok with anything as long as everyone is happy and not super bored (an issue that arises w one particular person) #its only an issue cuz whenever they get bored they make their partner feel bad for wanting ti stay. its liek. why did u even come then if #ur just gonna be bored and mopey? idk #ig im just anxious beans idk. group settings stress me out cuz im always worried what if ppl dont mesh well? #its gonna be 7 ppl aaaa

[moonkssd]

[RULES] [ABOUT] [HEADCANONS]

#self promo #private meaning mutuals only #selective as in sometimes headcanons and such just don't mesh and that's ok #you are still a cool person rp just doesn't work out easily

[newlyy]

im closer to my family than i am to any friends just by virtue of shared history and living together. when im doing really badly, i only go to my family, when i need help i go to my family first, my anxiety is lowest around my family, etc etc. family is significant for me, which makes me afraid of getting older and losing it. idk who i’d be without my core four-person family and our home base. im about to cry just thinking about it, i NEED them, I am them, they are me

#one time i straight up bawled listening to cest la mort by the civil wars and thinking about my family #the line 'you can sink to the bottom of the sea but don't go without me' #ive had issues with my dad for my whole life #our personalities just dont mesh together #but he got cancer and i told my friend who knows that i have a rocky relationship with him and she was like 'and how do you feel about that? #girl bad. hes my dad. theres no other way to feel. #theres no like well when i was thirteen i hated him so rip #i feel bad. #oh my god! did any of you ever watch the dr. blake mysteries? #there was one episode where a woman murdered her step father after finding out that he had murdered her father #and i think the cop interrogating her said something like 'that he killed your father doesn't make it ok to kill him' and she was like #'yeah well i miss my dad' in the saddest most childlike voice #girl i know exactly what you mean

[freebooter4ever]

This is 1000% random but came to mind regarding the duck movie. I sometimies watch movies without sound if I think they might ~suck~ like that... so just a tip if you want to see it but not sort of experience it :D hahahha

heh, well. ive already seen it fully so the damage has been done. i bought it even, thinking i would want to rewatch it, but i really REALLY dont think i will. ever. i have watched a LOT of bad movies for my stupid infatuations over the years so honestly im used to it.

#Im not gonna pretend like it doesnt hurt a little seeing the kind of movie joe is ok with attaching his name to #I was vaguely aware he was conservative but i will admit i didnt really have it shoved in my face until this #It reminds me of one of my closest friends here who just...we meshed in a that natural immediate connection way #And one day we were sitting in the getty villa just chatting and i was talking about the amazing documentary the Janes on h * b *o #And he just casually threw out there that he was pro life and anti abortion and he kind of wished he could force a woman #To carry his child against her wishes #He insinuated that when he was younger he got someone pregnant on accident and she refused to have the baby and got an abortion #And he felt it was a violation of his rights not to be able to force her to have a baby #And let me tell you i was like a slap in the face #Like that is...it is so discounting a womans right to her own body #It was chilling to hear a guy who i vibed with so well talk about a woman as if she's just a body and nothing else #I personally have been lucky or ugly enough that its never been an issue i have no idea how i feel about it #I mean my grandma WAS catholic and that seeps down no matter how lapsed i am #So i dont think i would have an abortion? But like i said i really genuinely like kids and in an ideal world would want that #But god im in my thirties now and still not financially stable enough to support a child i have no idea what i would have done #Had i gotten pregnant on accident #I spent most of my twenties recovering from an abusive relationship and not letting men touch me so it was never a question #Im just saying its a womans body its her life pregnancy is simple for some but for others its a life altering experience #It should be her right to choose :( and i wish men respected women enough considered them human enough to recognize that #If the shoe were on the other foot what man would let a woman decide that he must be pregant for 9 months #ALSO for fucks sake women shouldnt have to be practically celibate like i was just to prevent any accident from happening #Also also it is so fucked up that the same people who are pro life are also the bob types - skeptical of adoption #Like this is how you get unwanted kids in the world and take it from me that kids childhood is really really weird #Like knowing from a young age that you are what ruined your mothers life????? Fucking weird man i dont think i will ever process it #Especially being a woman now and recognizing that yeah i kinda did ruin my mothers life but it was neither of our fault #It was the pressure of society and people Trying To Do What They Are Supposed To #Meanwhile my dad was the I Could Never Love Other Peoples Kids and I Hate All Children That Arent My Own type #So yeah i guess i have a lot of negative feelings about this movie after all #Anyway it might have completely killed the joe infatuation LOL probably for the best #Dont even get me started on the blink or you miss it homophobia with bonus weird almost racism in the therapy scenes

[toastsnaffler]

really horribly anxious this morning and can't seem to shake it off :-(

#struggling not to dissociate. just don't really know what I'm going to do with all this i think thats where its coming from #+ exacerbated by so much recent disappointment. its hard not to direct that towards myself even when im not really at fault #not to mention disappointment in other people. which is really just more self disappointment for having expectations in the first place #which are unfeasible/not communicated. i just feel so unreal and unreachable. kind of just incompatible with the world i think #and i dont remember how to weave myself back into it again.im not sure ive ever really known how. immiscibility innit #its ok. going to try and start meditating daily again. and negotiate better boundaries for myself. it might help to journal it out #not on here i mean in a physical journal. i can't hold this exclusively in my head or I'll want to start harming again ik its a trigger #its all okay tho sorry this sounds more dramatic than it actually is. my flatmates gone out so at least i can cry while doing chores #she was dressed up nice and came to say goodbye when she left which she doesnt normally do so i dont think she'll be back for a while #hope she has a good time whatever shes up to. probably shouldve asked in hindsight but im too anxious to be able to talk today #and selfishly it would make me feel worse trying not to compare myself to how much more meshed with reality she is she makes it look easy #she only wanted me to do her suncream but i started trembling rly badly after. just cant physically be around other people right now #well at least i didnt cry in front of her so thats something. okay. ive made a list of tasks so im going to pick them off one at a time #i shouldnt have to think too much about them. and hopefully by the time im done ill feel much calmer #and then maybe i can play a game or smth. but if not i wont be hard on myself ill just go lie down and listen to music instead #man it is a shame about this festival though but it is what it is. therell be other days. i guess im not really a weekend person hey #ah itll all pass its all good. im always okay again eventually however temporarily. i dont need anything other than that #.diaries

[be-good-to-bugs]

never again would i like to work on Halloween

#the bin #halloween is for spending alone or for getting absolutely wrecked and being qround a bunch of people #NOT for spending at work doing work being at work stamding at work walking around all day at work doing work at work #but hey. at least it was a very slow tuesday bc everyone was busy with halloween. so ill only have 1 tuesday left #looking forward to starting my new job. i actually kinda really enjoy customer service. i love interacting with people for short time #ofc people can be mean and bad but i can deal with that just fine. i get so much out of short nice interactions and those are discouraged #where i work now. i try to be nice and have friendly interactions as much as i can because its nice but overall my experience is just around #people but not interacting with them otehr than to ask them to please move. when i do interact with people im so nice and helpful and i like #doing it but its kinda bleh. idk. i know im prob gonna hate this job a lot of the time too but id like something different. #and honestly i think itll be good for me. my social anxiety and ability to interact with people is so much better than it was before #and like. it happened so shortly after starting this job. i had to do things so i did and now i know its ok. i have a better understanding #of how people behave and react to how i am and all that stuff. and i think itd be nice to be in an environment where i can be kinda jokey #im a silly person but i think ive cracked maybe 2 jokes total while working at this place for almost 6 months #i make like 12 jokes a day at least when i interact with other people. when i talk or tjink about stuff i just make jokes constantly #but i.dont feel like i can do that at this job. the people are nice but its just a different environment and my type of humor and #personality doesnt mesh well if im joking. i work well there but its kinda bleh for me #but my managers were very nice about my giving my 2 weeks so. and perfect timing because tomorrow im training someone #new to start the same job as me to help out. woulve been doing it anyway and theyd be tehre to fill in when im out suck but instead i #think theyll just replace me so it works out. and i like teaching peope how to do my job :> #me rambling abt my life. nobody cares to read this lol. its not matter. these posts are boring but it feels nice to post stuff like it #makes me feel less isolated even of nobody sees it. different from thping it into a private notes app #idk. i need to talk to people more

[stuckinapril]

the devil’s whispers:

you can do it tomorrow (if you don’t do it now you’ll never do it ever)

you have a lot of time left (life is actually pretty short and we don’t have that much time)

you can skip this one little thing today (you are functioning solely due to the fact that you have a routine)

i must respond to this one thing that is bothering me immediately (you don’t have to do anything, it’s all in ur head)

I must check my phone (u don’t have to do anything, it’s all in ur head)

panicking is productive (panicking never makes a situation better, but in fact exacerbates it)

I must listen to music while doing the most minute task (u don’t have to do anything, it’s all in ur head. and I like music as much as the next person but moments of sheer silence are crucial)

I must befriend everyone (some people just don’t mesh together and that is ok)

I can skip working out for the day (working out does so much for ur physical AND mental health)

If misfortune happens to me it’s because I am uniquely unlucky (misfortune has nothing to do with preordained circumstances and everything to do with random odds)

If I am mistreated it’s because I am a horrible person and I deserve it (most times people are projecting their issues onto u and it has nothing to do with u)

if I make a mistake I am uniquely horrible (we are all human and we all make mistakes. the important thing is to hold ourselves accountable and learn from them)

I must have this one thing I really want now (u don’t have to do anything, it’s all in ur head. also whatever u want will still be here tomorrow so this sense of urgency is false)

I am uniquely hated/disliked/ostracized (most people are busy w their own lives and don’t have the time to be hating on u. and if they really are then their life is pretty empty and their opinion should not be held in high regard to begin with)

#14 because I’m an April 14 baby <3 and the nearer my bday gets the more I reflect on everything I learned in the past year

[timeslugarts]

Ok! I've never written anything nsfw, so this is a test run WIP.

It's not finished, tbh it's barely nsfw, but I just want you to let me know if I should keep going or if I'm doing well.

Vox x Reader at a club

This is gonna be my face sitting fic lmao

Valentino's personal club was exactly how you'd expect it to be, dark, sweaty, and mysteriously damp.

Music pounded through speakers that you could feel in your heart as throngs of bodies meshed together on the dance floor.

This wasn't your first time here, but unlike the last time you were here with a goal in mind.

Your "goal" was sitting at a table by himself, unsurprising since most of the regular patrons were probably too scared to approach Vox, since he was one of the more powerful overlords and anyone who did try to sit next to him he'd probably kill on the spot.

His eyes were lidded as he scanned the crowd before him, searching for something, or maybe just enjoying the view. He swirled a glass of amber liquid between his fingers and took a long drink. That's when he spotted you, high heels, tight black dress that left little to the imagination. His antennas perked up at the sight.

You were heading straight for him. He quickly finished his drink as continued to watch your quickly approaching form.

No introductions were had as your fingers wrapped around his tie and dragged him to the nearest private room of the club. Vox didn't mind, he eagerly followed you like a lost puppy.

The two of you had been having these meetings in secret for weeks now. They were good for relieving the Vox's tension, always having to deal with Val and Velvette, or the stress of Hell and that damned radio demon. Here with you he was just another stranger in a bar, just another nobody.

As soon as the door closed he picked you up and threw you on the soft bed. The silken sheets gave way for your supple curves that his hands were itching to explore.

You looked up at him through your lashes, an eyebrow arched. A silent question asking him what he wanted.

"You look so pretty like this doll, I'm just enjoying the view." He leaned over you grabbing your chin in his claws, his legs on either side of your thighs. Vox lifted your face to meet his own, his electric blue tongue sneaking out to push its way into your mouth. You gasped at the feeling, the static from his screen causing all the hairs on your body to stand up. It was like sucking on a battery.

"You're so sweet." He growls as his tongue leaves your mouth and trails its way across your cheek and down your throat. Small shocks could be felt the whole way down.

#vox x oc #hazbin vox #vox x reader #vox #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader

[akanesheep]

What pet would they give MC:

Lucifer:

Lucifer wouldn’t just gift them a pet, but that pet requires the ability of homing and caring. He would gift them an aviary. Attached to this aviary would be a large enclosed area with a pair of peacocks. He selected them personally, ensuring that not only were they physically beautiful, but also that their personalities meshed well together. After all, he wants to ensure that this gift, as all other gifts he gives you, are as perfect as possible.

Mammon:

Mammon would pick a pair of his young crows and assign them to you. As they are his familiars, he can keep a watch on you no matter where you are. Crows are also resourceful and able to work out how to live no matter where they are… they do like to stay in the aviary a lot, but most often they stay in the tree within your room.

Levi:

Levi know without being told that a snake is a bad idea, look what happened with Henry 1.0… so he will get you a goldfish also. And if you want, he would get you an aquarium set up for your room.

‘What? You want Lily to be in the same tank as Henry??’

Cue happy Levi noises.

Many an evening are spent watching the two goldfish swim happily together as you hold hands and cuddle.

Satan:

Come on… do I even need to say it?

You open the box to find an adorably fluffy silver furred kitten inside with a green collar. A small heart tag hangs from her neck.

‘Diana’ you read and then giggle softly. ‘You remembered?’

You had told him about your favorite show to watch as a child, which had started as a manga. He read them all with you when he managed to get a full set for your birthday.

‘Of course I did… when the owner of the cat cafe told me he had a surprise litter he offered me first choice. When I saw her I knew.’

I mean, it could have been a unicorn, technically, but unicorns are for war. (Guy Kay fans ftw) Satan wants no part of you near a battlefield, so he hasn’t even allowed you to see his own unicorn.

Asmodeus, Beel, & Belphie:

Ok, you guys don’t hate me… but these three just aren’t animal people. Like they don’t hate animals at all… but they’re the least able to truly care for animals.

For Asmo, his priorities just aren’t there. And that’s ok. He knows his limits and is responsible enough to stay in them. He’s ok with other people’s pets as long as they stay off of him. He puts a lot into every aspect of his appearance and doesn’t want to give that up. (No hate at all for him. He know what he does and doesn’t want, and not everyone wants a pet). If you asked him for a pet, he would get you one, but he has no self-interest.

Also, his ‘animal’ is a scorpion, which horrifies him, he wouldn’t give one as a pet.

For Beel, he loves animals, especially dogs… but also has a tendency to eat animals if he goes on a rampage…he would never want to put you in a situation where he would accidentally hurt your pet.

His ‘animal’ being a fly isn’t really the kind of pet anyone wants…

For Belphie: I mean, while he’d love to get you a cow to rampage through the HoL gardens and piss Lucifer off, the truth is, he just isn’t willing/able to put that kind of effort into a pet. Instead, he’ll get you a cow plushie.

Diavolo:

Our sweet demon would get you a phoenix. He finds them absolutely fascinating, and you remind him of one, the way you always rise through any troubles in your wake.

(Dragons are not pets, but they will befriend you)

Barbatos:

He has enough on his plate without adding another pet. He’ll just assign you a Little D to take care of whatever you need while he is away.

Simeon & Luke:

This angel would gift you a pair of white doves.

They don’t get along with Mammon’s crows, so don’t let them in the aviary at the same time! Luckily they tend to avoid each other. That said, these doves are super sweet, just like the angels who gave them to you

Solomon:

No. Keep this man away from the pets. His penchant for experimenting on others is already problematic at best. Lucifer banned him from the aviary after he turned one of the peacocks into an owl and turned a crow into a mouse… it got really crazy for a few minutes.

This man is the pet, good luck us.

Hope you liked it, I wanted to keep this one light hearted.

I’m thinking of doing some more song vids, let me know what you think?

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me headcanons #obey me mammon #obey me! #obey me satan #obey me leviathan #obey me mc #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #obey me luke

[jupiter-letters]

Dating J'onn J'onnz would include:

Fem!Reader or GN!Reader TW: None

A/N: For the sake of my sanity and J’onn’s happiness, Martians are alive and well and these headcanons are based more on the young justice show. The reader is already a member of the justice league in this but maybe I’ll do some civilian headcanons later.

You both started out as pretty good friends but you never thought he’d like you romantically due to cultural differences. For him what you looked like didn’t really matter, your personalities meshed so well he wanted you around all the time. 

Despite having an open and honest friendship you kind of tried to bury your feelings from J’onn when you guys would talk telepathically. He did pick up on this though and it bothered him for a while but he didn’t want to pry. 

There’s this lingering tension though, you both like each other but one doesn’t want to overstep and the other is afraid of rejection. Other people can pick up on it too but nobody wants to say anything. There’s this romantic undertone with how you guys talk to each other but again nobody says anything. The other members of the league watching you guys interact is basically like this:

J’onn: “Would you like some refreshments after your journey to the watchtower? I’ve prepared some coffee for you.”  You: Ah, no thank you I appreciate it! Are you ok? I heard your last fight in Metropolis was tough, I was worried about you.  J’onn: And I you, your battle with Grodd caused me some distress but it was well fought. I’m happy you are unharmed.”

Wonder woman, Superman and Shazam standing in the corner like ???🧍‍♀️🧍‍♂️🧍???

Things really get shaken up when M’gann makes her debut, she picks up on it as soon as you enter the room thinking you wouldn’t mind(due to your friendship of course). She ends up reaching into that crevice you thought you’d hidden. J’onn is unaware of this for like a second before she just comes out and says it. “Uncle J’onn have you guys started dating yet??” After she says that he’s looking at her like 👁️👄👁️. 

You fall out of your chair and M’gann realizes she messed up. Lucky for her she made a swift exit out of the room. You try not to make eye contact but J’onn is looking directly at you. 

At this point you both couldn’t put it off anymore and talked it out. You tell him your insecurities and he does the same. His fears about the attraction not being mutual due to the whole alien thing. Fortunately for you guys none of that matters since you’re so sickeningly in love. Now we get to the nitty gritty! The dating!

J’onn does everything in his power to learn Earth customs, especially your own culture, the language, the food. He wants to learn about it all to be closer to you. If english isn’t your native language he does a little brain download of it and speaks it with you. He’ll even prepare your favorite dish despite many, many failed attempts. When you make the same effort to learn about Martian culture it really warms his heart. It’s a rocky road but you get the hang of it, his family loves having you over. They’ll shapeshift into you when you come over and give you one big hug. 

You have to awkwardly explain why you’re seeing a new guy every week before J’onn chooses a form he likes. He doesn’t understand why it’d be a problem but he stops for you. It doesn’t matter though since he takes it off when you get home or when you’re among friends. He loves to shapeshifter for you to make you laugh, turning into celebrities or mascots to prank you. You wake up in the morning and open the bathroom door to see Chiitan taking a shower. He’ll even do stupid stuff like long furbys or the fresno nightcrawler. 

Fighting together is a breeze, nobody is crazy enough to go after you in the field. And psychic attacks forget it, you can’t beat a martian when it comes to telepathy. People often underestimate how strong J’onn actually is but they do enter the process of fucking around and finding out. He never doubts your ability to protect yourself either but if the need arises and you get overwhelmed he will step in. 

You understand J’onn’s feelings more than most, despite constantly being linked to each other’s mind. Like Bruce his body language is subtle, there are certain ways his lips twitch or how he rubs his fingers together. You both have a great understanding of each other’s emotions, it’s so wonderful, he never keeps things from you and is very blunt with his opinions. He feels like it’s insulting to you to use flowery language instead of being honest. 

He doesn’t mind PDA, however much you’re comfortable with he’ll do. However he won’t be hanging off of you in public, he will stay within arms reach. He always wants you to know he’s nearby and you’re safe. His love language largely revolves around words of affirmation. J’onn is a great person to vent to since he is a great listener and he’s lived a long life so he’s got some words of wisdom. You need advice? He’s your man and if you don’t he’s a good listener.

You can literally feel how much he loves you, he’ll even show you how he sees you. All colorful and bright like the sun. He’d literally walk through fire for you, his loyalty is unmatched.🗣️🗣️ You always tell him he doesn’t need to but he’ll do it anyway. After the most difficult day of missions and handling Martian and Earth politics, a moment in your arms rejuvenates him. For someone who isn’t super touchy the other thing he loves to do is hold your head in his hands and press your foreheads together. No words are exchanged, you just quietly enjoy each other’s presence. 

Thanks for reading! Lemme know what you think. Please like or reblog if you like my stuff.

#~⋆｡°tales from the dreaming #dcau x reader #dc comics headcanons #dc animated imagine #dc comics x reader #dcamu x reader #j'onn j'onzz x reader #j'onn j'onzz #dating headcanons #reader insert

[yuurei20]

Toboso Yana on writing dialogue for Twisted Wonderland:

The dialogue in lessons, on the home screen, and when the cards are leveled was created jointly by myself and a scenario writer from my own studio, D-6th.

We had a setting sheet with detailed settings for each character that had information on their background, family structure, personality, talents, etc., as well as a motivation chart for each class, which we used as our basis for the creation of the game.

However, this was our first time writing lines for a game...we were completely in the dark during production, unable to imagine the atmosphere that would be influenced by the dialogue.

Of course f4samurai explained all of their work to us, but when we tried to test the game we found that many parts were completely different from what we had been imagining.

The dialogue and scenes did not mesh, a number of lines had to be rerecorded...overall, many of the characters ended up acting annoyed, so every time I used an item for training I was repeatedly told, 'What? Don't bother me. Shut up.' I thought, 'Wow, ok, this is annoying' (laughs).

Right up until the release of the game everything was just so hectic."

#twstyana #Toboso Yana #twisted wonderland

[bestworstcase]

So, regarding your Tai post,

https://www.tumblr.com/bestworstcase/748954216598470656/the-perennial-tai-discourse-is-really-interesting?source=share

I had some thoughts: I technically cover it in a separate post

https://www.tumblr.com/tumblingxelian/749060919422861312/really-solid-addition-here-much-like-with-qrows

But I'm unsure if the links will work so here is a slightly edited & expanded version:

Now, the idea that Ruby & Yang had very different childhoods is not an idea I strictly disagree with. But, I also think it is a bit inaccurate to treat it as outlined in your post.

What I mean is that while Yang is definitely more overt in the fact she feels Tai and the other adults failed them and defaults to centering family moments on Ruby. (For instance she frames the Zwei package as something to cheer Ruby up, its not for her & Ruby's the one really excited, Yang's just kind of there about it)

Despite that, Ruby herself doesn't have a simple relationship with Tai, or in fact she just might but that's not a good thing.

See, Ruby does not think about Tai very often, he's largely an afterthought in her letters for one. But more to the point he is not someone Ruby goes to for advice or guidance or even comfort.

Post Beacon, she mostly gets an update from him and is not bothered to see him go. She is OK being a bit more vulnerable around Qrow.

But the person she actually seeks out and seems utterly shocked at not receiving comfort from is Yang. It was also Yang who she questions for what to do next and Yang whom she confided her plans in before leaving.

Again she is shocked when Yang cannot supply these things to her.

Tai is her dad, but its a superficial relationship, he's nice, he can be fun, she does love him. She does not however, seem to perceive him as a reliable or responsible adult from whom she seeks protection or guidance.

The person she always defaulted to for that was Yang until she could no longer fill the role post V3 which likely fed into her issues with showing vulnerability in V9.

I tend to think she might have been more open to it in V5 given the breakdown tears & hug, but then Yang demonstrated she was still very much not all right & Ruby had no clue what to do. So she just sort of locked into her head that Yang needed 'her' protection now, not the other way around.

I would also just straight up note that even Ruby said it was Yang who raised her. Like, that wasn't even subtle, she knows who the parent was in that house and it wasn't Tai or Qrow. I don't think she'd say that if their childhoods were 'so' different that Tai was a functional parent to her but not Yang.

She definitely has a less... frosty relationship with the two grown men who she grew up around, Largely because they project the saintly Summer onto her and the Wretched Raven onto Yang.

Again, let's not forget Qrow's entirely willing to accept Yang brutalized a kid for shits and giggles or is "crazy". Or that Tai outright sees a lot of Raven in Yang, despite most of the traits he described not meshing with Yang's demonstrated or self described persona.

But even with that more positive relationship being projected onto and still raised by a sister two years your senior isn't exactly ideal. Both sisters had a shitty childhood, both were deeply neglected and failed and suffered because of that fact.

all true! but the nature of parentification is that the children experience the neglect in very different ways; the elder child is forced into an adult role, parenting the younger child, who is harmed in more invisible ways because they do have a caretaker—their sibling. anecdotally nearly every account of a childhood i’ve read by an adult who was raised as a child by older siblings has either alluded to or outright described 1. a much better childhood than their caretaking sibling(s) got, 2. because their sibling(s) shielded them from the worst neglect or abuse.

with that in mind and taking into consideration things like the different reactions to the package from tai (this will cheer ruby up vs ooh, something from home!) and yang staying behind at beacon when tai takes ruby to visit the memorial stone, and now these clear differences in how the girls feel about the boba shop (yang: unsure, downplaying the surprise, maybe it’s dumb / ruby: boba!!!) which probably reflect their emotional experience of the outings with dad (yang: fun, happy that ruby is so excited, not that special otherwise / ruby: magical)…

well, let’s put it this way:

yang did not have a real caretaker starting from age five, when she became the de facto main parent to her three-year-old sister with at best sporadic breaks when qrow wasn’t too blackout drunk / tai was having a good day.

ruby had a primary caretaker who struggled but was always there (yang) and a dad who had to work a lot but made time to do special things like the boba trips so that he could spend quality time with his family (tai). plus an uncle she sometimes needed to help her sister deal with.

yang being parentified has the effect of insulating ruby from the severity of tai’s neglect; in a functional single-income household where one parent stays home and the other works to support the family and both parents are adults who chose this dynamic and enjoy their respective roles, the working parent is not bad or neglectful simply because they aren’t around during the day to take care of the kids, and they can foster close, loving relationships with their children by making the most of the time they have at home. the childhood ruby had was a dysfunctional imitation of that dynamic.

and then factoring in the summer-vs-raven projection, when tai was around he focused on bonding time with ruby moreso than yang.

the net result is that the harm to ruby is much more invisible (yang by virtue of being a child herself could not provide ruby with healthy parent-child boundaries or the emotional stability children need from their parents to feel secure and develop good emotional regulation; tai’s favoritism of ruby being intertwined with idealizing of summer fucked ruby’s sense of self really badly; in the first few volumes ruby feels hurt and bewildered every time yang acts like her sister instead of her parent).

ruby sees clearly and states in volume nine that yang raised her; i don’t think she would have been able to articulate that so plainly in volume one, and this is something she’s come to realize after leaving home / living independently. in v1 it’s “yang used to read to me when we were little” and i’d bet that’s how ruby would phrase everything yang did—as discrete habits, not the combined pattern of “yang raised me.”

whereas yang like. the first thing she does at beacon is try to step away from ruby: encouraging her to meet new people then ditching her to catch up with friends, not wanting to partner up with her for initiation… much as yang loves her sister and enthusiastically supports her, it’s also pretty obvious that yang saw beacon as an opportunity to focus on herself for once. which says to me that she’d already grasped that their home life was messed up and that she needed to break those patterns once she left.

#profoundly different childhoods not much in the sense of good/bad but covert/overt harm. #which is p typical for any kind of favoritism dynamic #the favored child will have a happier childhood that masks the insidious ways the dysfunction Fucks Them Up

[rotationalsymmetry]

Imagine being Orion in A Deadly Education.

People are mostly not that interesting to you. They don't like you so much as they like what you can do. Maybe at some point you tried to really connect with someone, and it didn't go that well, so you didn't keep trying. Fighting mals though? You're good at that. It makes sense to you, unlike most of the things people do. It's rewarding -- intrinsically rewarding -- and people seem to be happy that you're doing it? Because they don't like doing it but it benefits them. So, basically no downside.

And you go off to school and it's full of mals, and people think you're great because you fight the mals, and you ignore them as best you can when you're not fighting mals for them. (You're polite, your mother always wanted you to be polite and you don't want people to be mad at you. But you don't do anything beyond being polite.) And people seem to think you're doing a good thing. So. It's ok. It's good enough. The world makes sense, more or less. This is what you're for.

And one day you see a soul eater go under another student's door, and you destroy it like you always do. Except this person is mad at you. Which makes no sense. No one's ever been mad at you before, not for fighting mals. So apparently you did something wrong even though you only did what you always do which has always been right before. But you guess you should probably make it up to her? So when she says she needs to go to the shop at dinner you offer to go with her, why not?

Except somehow she's mad at you again. So you have to make it up to her even more now, you guess?

(You don't like it when people are mad at you, but you know what to do when people are mad at you. You Make It Up To Them, usually by doing whatever they tell you to or fighting a mal or both, and then they stop being mad at you. You prefer to understand why they are mad at you, but most of the time it makes no sense, and you know what to do when it makes no sense to you why someone is mad at you.)

So you guard her door while she fixes it. Which takes her a weirdly long time. You've just taken down several mimics, you're bursting with mana, you'd give her some if she asked. Mana has never been a scarce resource for you; on some level it hasn't really occurred to you that it could be a scarce resource for anyone else. People aren't that interesting to you, you don't think about them much, except when someone tells you to, like your mother making you do flash cards of other kids' names. But she doesn't ask, and she doesn't cheat either, she does things the long and hard way, which makes a third thing all coming from the same person that doesn't mesh with your pre-existing worldview. She's fascinating.

And then she pulls on your mana like it's nothing and she's even more fascinating. How did she do that? Is she a malificer? (Is that why she keeps being so mean to you, when nobody is ever mean to you?) What's going on?

And you've never voluntarily fought alongside anyone else before, but she's good to fight with. She's annoying, but she does also point out things you missed or didn't know.

And she stands up for you, in a way that nobody has ever stood up for you before. She's not nice. She's the opposite of nice. But it's starting to dawn on you that being nice is not the same as something else that seems like it should go with being nice. And if El is not nice to you but is that other thing, maybe some other people who are nice to you are...not that other thing to you?

It's a lot to think about.

Anyways. You like her. You're not very interested in people. But you are interested in El.

And then you have the best day of your life, when you've gotten to take on more mals and scarier mals than you've ever taken on before, and you did it and you were good at it, and you kind of didn't want to leave but you were supposed to leave because that was how the Mission worked, and then you were about to die because you missed the bell and the cleansing fires had started and there was nowhere to go, but at least you were going to die next to El.

But she didn't think she was going to die, and she cast a wall of mortal flame (who does that?) and it worked as a firebreak and you didn't die and no one had ever saved you before. That wasn't how the world worked. Who was this person who kept breaking the rules of how the world worked like they didn't even apply to her?

(And then you look around and she isn't there and you kissed her earlier when you thought you were both going to die, and she, uh, didn't react well and oh no, what if you've ruined everything what if you like her but she doesn't like you like that what if she won't want to be around you any more? What if the one interesting person in the entire world doesn't think you are interesting?) (it'd be ok, right? It was ok before.) (it wouldn't be ok. So maybe it wasn't ok before either.)

#a deadly education #the scholomance #Orion lake #a deadly education spoilers #the scholomance spoilers #they are two dorks who are utterly incapable of normal human interactions and I love them #the mortal flame was not the first time el saved Orion's ass #it was maybe the third #freezing the grogler and making sure he didn't go down to the graduation hall alone #at least #oh I just realized at the start of the book el said it would be ok if Orion #saved her life a ludicrously high number of times like 13 #and at the end Orion says his count is 13 #so I guess el got what she wanted there in a weird way?