#tbh a lot came up in my personal life but I'm slowly coming back to it!

[genkais-arcade]

hi! do you accept gif requests?

Unfortunately not! I make gifs by the episode, making between 50-100 per ep on average (the upper end is close to 120, esp in the dark tournament arc).

I have gone through episode 55 and took a pause for most of the year to let my queue exhaust itself.

I am returning to episode 1 to remake some earlier episodes with subtitles in my gifs! So, I won't be doing any of the later episodes of the show for quite a while :)

#ive made thousands of yyh gifs #and thousands of gifs for my other blogs #i needed a break this year #tbh a lot came up in my personal life but I'm slowly coming back to it! #thanks to my past self for making enough gifs to post once a day for most of the year #seriously i havent made a new gif since like february #my blog has been pure queue posts

[bbybearcubbs]

New Neighbor - Nice To Meet You

〖Warning/s〗⪼ Lots of focus on Han's beauty (BEWARE - he's gorgeous), that's all tbh.

〖Genre〗⥤ Fluff ☑ Angst ☐ Suggestive ☐

〖Stray Kids〗⥤ Neighbor!Jisung x Reader

〖Status〗⥤ Ongoing {Word Count: 2K }

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Description: You recently moved into a new neighborhood. A wonderful house with rent so cheap it was too good to be true. You were really questioning whether life was playing with you because meeting Han Jisung also seemed to good to be true.

Network/s: @kflixnet

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Your new house was a two bedroom home with a living room, a kitchen and a bathroom. Granted it was a two story house with another home right above you. A simple example would be saying it was just 1 one story house placed on top of another.

You knew you'd have upstairs neighbors, which was completely fine with you. You just had to hope they would be respectful enough to acknowledge you lived downstairs and not to be too noisy. And it would seem your luck hadn't run out.

Your first month of living there and you didn't hear a peep from them. You had taken a small container of chocolate chip cookies upstairs to introduce yourself but they didn't seem to be home.

You tried again the next day but they weren't there either. Assuming they were just very busy and always out, you stopped going and eventually forgot about introducing yourself.

It'd been almost two months since you've been living there. By now you had completely remodeled the second room into a small studio for your streams and you'd actually forgotten you were supposed to have neighbors. They just never seemed to be home. Until today that is.

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I was in my backyard removing my dried laundry from the clothes line. My headphones were blasting Tomorrow by Together's most recent song "Do It Like That" which was a collaboration between them and The Jonas Brothers.

I was humming the song, completely ignoring the rest of the world around me. Once I was finished I picked up my basket of clothes, the song coming to an end. The familiar sound of the automated low power warning rang through my ears and I groaned looking up at the sky. Why did it need to charge now? I stood there for a moment taking in the beautiful view above me.

I slowly turned, wanting to get a full 360 view of the sky. It was beautiful today. Halfway around my eyes landed on the balcony above my backdoor. The one belonging to my upstairs neighbors. I stared for a moment, blinking away the initial shock of what I was seeing. There was someone up there. A man leaned against the balcony railings. He was very pretty, kinda beautiful actually and he was looking at me and waving.

I take off my headphones, dropping them around my neck. The man immediately spoke. "Can you hear me now?" He asked with a chuckle. His voice was soft but also deep. His voice is really nice.

"Oh I'm sorry! Were you calling me?" I asked, walking closer to the balcony. "Yes I was, only for a little while though" the man replied. I set my basket down at my feet and looked back up at him.

"You're my new neighbor right?" He asked, looking down at me. His curly brown hair falling over his eyes. Who's messy curls ever look that good? "I wouldn't say I'm new" I say sarcastically. "There's a slight chance I've been living here for almost two months" I add, sticking my thumbs in my jeans pockets. The man laughed, pushing his curls back with his hands. That was attractive. Why was that attractive? "Right, right" he says.

"So were you deliberately ignoring me when I came to your door or?...." I ask rocking back and forth on my heels. "What? No no- I wasn't at home" he exclaimed standing up straight. "I was on vacation the last 3 months'' he says and I let out a silent 'O' "So you weren't just super quiet" I said and the man laughed again. "I've been told I'm not the quietest person ever" he begins. "But I'm not horrible to live with'' he finishes with a smile. His eyes are smiling too, pretty...

I closed the door behind me when I got inside. My bedroom leads to the laundry room and the laundry room leads to my back yard. I open the door to my room and place the basket of clothes at the foot of my bed. I quickly plug my headphones in and place them on my desk.

I returned his smile without even realizing it. "I'll be the judge of that neighbor" I say, bending down and picking up my basket. "It's Han" I heard as I straightened up again. I look up and tilt my head slightly. "I'm Han Jisung," he smiles. "Y/n" I say smiling. "Nice to meet you Han Jisung" I grin before walking inside.

Just then the doorbell rings. I wasn't expecting anyone so I had who was at my door but I went to answer it anyway. "Coming!" I yell and open the door. "O-oh Hi" I was a little surprised to see Jisung standing at my door. "Howdy" he grins and I had to grip the doorknob tighter to stop from fainting. His smile is so much prettier up close.

"Can I come in?" He asks after an unnecessarily long moment of silence passes. "Yes- yeah come in" I stammer stepping to the side. Why am I so embarrassing? Jisung comes in and it's then I realize how much taller he is than me. I close the door and then turn towards Jisung.

"Woah…I love what you did with the place" he says turning to face me, staring down at me after doing a 360 scan of my home. "Thanks" I say, nervously scratching my neck, unsure what to do. "Can I?..." He asks and I follow his arm that's gesturing towards my couch. "Oh sure! Go ahead" I say. "Thanks!" Jisung says before dropping himself onto my couch.

"Woah…" he mumbles, sinking into the cushions. "Your couch is so soft" he says, sighing softly. "Yeah I know, this set is a gift from my granny" I say with a chuckle. Cute. "Your grandma has great taste" he says, turning his head to look at me with a laugh. I cover my mouth, laughing as well. He wasn't wrong.

Just then a bark was heard from my bedroom and my dog came running into the living room. He ran and jumped into Han's lap and started licking his face. "DINO!" I yelled, stumbling forward and scooping the dog off Jisung's lap. "I'm so sorry! He's usually friendly but never this friendly with strangers" I apologize to Jisung who only laughed in response.

"It's okay really, I love dogs!" He says and holds his arms out towards Dino. Dino had been whining and wiggling in my arms the whole time trying to get back to Jisung. Reluctantly, I placed Dino into Jisung's arms. Dino immediately started showering Jisung in puppy kisses, pawing at his chest gently, his tail wagging swiftly back and forth.

"Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy? Is it you Dino? Yes it's you!" He cooed at Dino, petting him and ruffling his soft blond fur. Jisung would laugh whenever Dino barked in response. I couldn't help but laugh at the two's cute interaction. Dino never acted this way meeting strangers, he's friendly but usually still on guard sometimes.

"Do you have any other pets?" Jisung asks softly petting a now calm Dino. "I do actually, give me a second" I say leaving the living room and go to the door to the right of my bedroom. I open it and step into my studio. "Kit! Kit come here girl" I call out and shortly after my cat Kit, crawls out from under my desk.

She walks over to me allowing me to scoop her up into my arms. I go back to the living room and sit on my three seater couch opposite to Jisung who was still sat on my two seater with Dino now laying down at his feet. "This is Kit" I introduced him to her. "Kit this is Jisung, our upstairs neighbor" I say gently turning her towards Jisung.

Kit hates strangers, she doesn't even go to any of my family members unless I'm near. "Can I hold her?" Jisung asks and I shake my head. "Sorry, she really doesn't like strangers, people in general actually" I say not wanting to risk her hurting Jisung. "Oh alright, I understand. Hopefully she'll let me hold her one day?" Jisung asks looking at Kit who only curls up in my lap and turns her back to him.

Jisung and I share a small laugh before looking at eachother. Jisung is the first one to break eye contact by turning his head around and pointing towards my studio room. "Is it okay if I go look at that room? It looks different from how my old neighbors had it, if you don't mind" he asks. "Yeah no problem" I say. I guess he's just really curious.

I gently place Kit onto the couch and stand up, Jisung stands as well and follows me to the door. I go in and allow Jisung to step in as well. "This is my studio room!" I grin, happy to show off my stuff. Jisung's eyes and mouth widen. "Woah, this looks so cool, what do you do?" He asks, looking at my set up with curiosity and excitement.

"I'm a streamer!" I say striking a pose proudly. "Seriously?! That's so cool! One of my friends is a streamer too!" He says and I can't hide my excitement. "Really? What's his name?" I asked eagerly, hoping I would recognize his friend's name. "He goes by the handle CB97" Jisung says and I gasp. Wait. The CB97?

"Did you just say CB97?" I ask in disbelief. "Yeah, but he lets everyone call him Chris" Jisung says and I cover my mouth to hide my widening smile. "You're friends with THE CB97?! I love his streams and music so much!" I exclaim excitedly. "You know him?" Jisung asks seemingly intrigued. "Of course I do! He's literally one of my idols!" I explain proudly.

"Look I even have one of his character plushies!" I say going to the shelf to my left and taking the Wolfchan Plushie Chris recently released in his merch store. Without realizing it I begin to ramble about Chris and my love for his streams. In the middle of my rant I locked eyes with Jisung who stood just starring at me with a smile. "Oh my gosh- I'm so sorry! I started rambling- I'm so so sorry-" I apologized.

"No it's okay, you seem excited to talk about it so I don't mind listening" he says and I feel my heart stop for a second. Did he just say he doesn't mind my rambling? What the actual heck? "O-oh…T-thanks" I say avoiding eye contact with him. "It's cute seeing how excited you got over my buddy's music" he adds and I choke on air. Cute? Did he just call me cute?

Just then Jisung's phone started ringing. He looks at the screen before looking back at me. "Can I take this?" He asks and I nod. Still too shocked by what he said before to properly process anything else. "Thanks!" He says and steps out of my studio. After a little while Kit comes into my room and rubs herself on my feet. "Kit he called me cute" I say softly, smiling down at her.

Kit meows, rubbing her cheeks onto my legs more. I squat down and pet her, smiling to myself without realizing. She's so cute. "Hey Y/n" Jisung calls coming back to my studio door. I look up at him, still on the ground petting Kit. "I'm sorry but I gotta go meet a few friends somewhere" he says and I nod. I pick up Kit and stand up, looking at Jisung.

"Well take care, tell them your new neighbor says hi" I chuckled. Jisung smiled, chuckling lightly. A few seconds of silence pass with Jisung looking as if he wanted to say something. I was about to say something when he spoke "Can I…Have your number?" He asks sheepishly. I swallowed the squeal in my throat and nodded. "Sure" I say taking his phone that he had stretched out for me to take.

I punched in my number and gave it back. "You can choose the contact name" I say and Jisung looks as if he's pondering over what name to give me before his face lights up and he quickly types in a name. Curiosity got the best of me and I leaned forward to see what name he'd given me. But before I could see Han pulled his phone away and locked it.

I looked at him confused and a little shocked. He smiled cheekily before speaking, "Nope! It's a secret" He smirks and I stood there still stunned with Kit in my arms. Just then Dino came into the room, standing beside Jisung. "Oh come on" I whine playfully and Han laughs making me laugh too.

"I gotta get going" Jisung says once his laughter calmed down. "Alright" I say smiling and walk him to the door. "It was nice meeting you Y/n" He says as he leaves. "Same to you Jisung" I replied and closing the door behind him. Before it closes completely Han turned around and winked at me with a grin before turning back towards his car.

Once the door was closed I turn around and lean against it holding my heated face. Did he just wink at me? What the heck Han....I shook my head, trying to get the image out my mind. I finally decided to head back to finish sorting through my laundry.

I couldn't stop smiling and chuckled softly to myself while in my room. Dino hopped onto my sat beside the pile of clothes I'd folded. "I mean he is pretty cute" I giggle petting Dino and he barks happily. I giggle at the action before finishing folding my clothes, smiling softly.

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New Neighbor Masterlist°

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Taglist: @jinhyun @afelia-123 @myboyfriendjake @wonillaa

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#♡cubbs♡ #kflixnet #k labels #✩Wips✩ #wip #stray kids #skz #stray kids han jisung #stray kids han #stray kids jisung #skz han jisung #skz han #skz jisung #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #han jisung #han x reader #jisung x reader

[kim-seung-mo]

Guest

Bang Chan x fem!Reader

“are you coming to my wedding?” “of course.”

♩one-shot, angst, ex-boyfriend chan, reader is getting married, just chan regretting and being sad

♩♩word count: 1k

♩♩♩A/N: tbh idk why anyone would anyone break up with chan... but anyways, hope you guys enjoy~ wip list here

this fic was heavily inspired by this song, please give it a listen!!!

[Unread message from: Y/N 10:03 PM]

Y/N: Chan, I'm getting married.

The fourth winter after your breakup, Chan received the first text message from you since then. It was just a short sentence, but it left him with a mixture of emotions. He wrote and deleted his reply, wrote it again and again, but nothing satisfied him. Chan hadn't been an indecisive person, even with your breakup four years ago, it was a clean break. He never involved himself with your life again during the four years. But why, four years later, did your simple words of "I'm getting married" make him so torn, so conflicted, so hesitant, so distressed?

Bang Chan: Congratulations.

Y/N: Will you come to my wedding?

In the end, after deleting and rewriting, he decided to send that one single word.

He felt a lot relieved after sending his reply, but at the same time, he felt a sense of emptiness and loneliness. It was as if something that he had been holding on to for four years had suddenly become devoid of any meaning.

Only he knew what that thing was.

It was a secret that he had buried in his heart for four years.

After a bitter chuckle, Chan replied.

Bang Chan: Yes, I will be there.

…… But why was his heart still aching? Why was his hand trembling?

Of course he'd be there, why not? You had invited him. If he refuses, wouldn't he be telling you "I still love you, I can't watch you marry someone else"? He couldn't not go, he had to prove to you that he had long forgotten you. He had to convince himself, he had to deceive himself… That he had stopped loving you a long time ago.

That's right, he stopped loving you a long time ago.

Why, for four years, did he not fall in love with anyone else?

Your partner certainly picked the right day. Your wedding was set in early spring, when life was reviving. The day was clear, the warm yet gentle sunlight shone through the stained glass, spilling over the entire church and onto you and him.

Your wedding dress, your veil, everything about you shone golden in the sunlight. Even the dust surrounding you danced in the sunlight like golden butterflies. You took the man's hand and slowly walked towards the priest, who looked at you and your partner with a smile and asked, "Groom, do you take this bride to be your lawfully wedded wife? For richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, in joy or in sorrow, to be unfailingly faithful to her for all eternity?"

Without a moment's hesitation, he looked at you with the same tender eyes Chan once did and said, "I do."

When he came back to his senses, you had finished your marriage vows as well.

Chan was sitting offstage, silently gazing at you.

He could not fool himself into thinking he was not imagining things. Seeing your beautiful features, his mind drifted back to that day four years ago. He couldn't help but start to wonder if it would have ended differently, if he had made a different choice… If he had held on for just a little longer ……

Could it be him who was to stand before you on stage and exchange marriage vows?

"I do." You gazed at the man in front of you with fondness and murmured softly.

The priest smiled and nodded, "Next, I ask the bride and groom to exchange rings."

As the crowd watched, the groom placed a dazzling diamond ring on your ring finger. And with a happy smile on your face, you gently put on the other ring for the groom.

It all went so smoothly, so naturally, as if it was meant to be.

Chan knew he should be wishing you well. Your partner seemed to love you very much. He could tell just from your expression alone how happy you were.

Compared to the night you broke up with him four years ago, the expression on your face right now was what suited you better.

He should wish you well, from the bottom of his heart.

But he couldn't.

In the moment when the priest announced that you were married, the reality came to shatter all his illusions.

How did forever become once? How did four years of waiting come to nothing? Why didn't you try to hold onto him?

Could it be that you simply never loved him in the first place?

Or did you merely move on and meet someone better than him?

You forgot about him and were able to talk to him calmly.

He has long since lost his place in your heart.

The person who was waiting in the same spot, the person who waited foolishly, the person who didn't have the courage to fight for you, the person who was still deceiving himself in the end, the person who didn't love you with all his heart, the person who made you hurt and sad again and again, the person who still loves you even now, the person who only realized at your wedding that it was too late ……

It was him.

[Unread message from: Bang Chan 5:20 PM]

There was nothing left between you.

This was your wedding, and he was just a guest.

Chan: He's so lucky to have met you

Chan: I hope he loves you more than I did

[A message was withdrawn]

Chan: Thank you, for allowing me to be your guest

#stray kids #skz #skz imagines #stray kids imagines #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #skz reactions #stray kids reactions #skz headcanons #stray kids headcanons #skz scenarios #stray kids scenarios #skz angst #stray kids angst #bang chan imagines #bang chan angst #bang chan x reader

[hechiima]

What I love about Miles' outburst on Adrian, is that Phoenix afterwards points out that it's not like him at all, like it's not his usual rudeness at court. And Miles using the exact same phrasing with her, abt choosing death, which is also uhh, points out to their similarities

Thank you for answering!

I also wanted to ask you what you think about Phoenix's life before the events of the game? I mean even before Dahlia, how lonely he should've been to always care abt and then chase after this one guy who stood up for him in 4th grade? Where his first motivation (to save Miles) coming from, I think this question is a bit unexplored in the fandom, besides the idea that Phoenix is just that altruistic and kind person. I mean he is kind, but there's gotta be roots in his childhood maybe

Oooh good point; I hadn't thought about that! Lmao Miles "I faked my death and came back After Winning Mental Health Because I Attended A Single Therapy Session" just saying the most unhinged things sir please. Also, you're right that it does feel a lot more personal than most of his other outbursts b/c of the language mirroring his own note...ough man is not okay during that whole trial huh...

Haha I think Phoenix's life before the games was completely unremarkable? I'm p sure the creators at some point said something to that effect and tbh I think it's the best interpretation for him. Because it would make more sense if he had some sort of trauma/big event but nope he's just Like That. Man is just Deranged and it's so funny honestly love that for him.

Also I love the idea of him being A Normal Guy through childhood - law school. He had a decent social circle and keeps moderately in touch with his friends after graduation through text/group chats. His law school/college group chats aren't really active but the people in it will text each other once every few months or whenever something big happens to someone. It's low-key and normal and all his friends are like yeah Phoenix. He's just a Nice Guy.

Then ofc one day he's all over the news for fucking CX'ing a bird in court and publicly exposing one of the top prosecutors in the district. All his friends are stunned. They start following his legal career and they're all slowly coming to the same conclusion that Phoenix was Actually That Crazy the entire time. And the worst part about all of this is, looking back, they're also realizing that there were definitely hints. For example, in law school he was a p mediocre student except when he Aggressively Wasn't and would just seemingly wander off and book a class. Or in college there was that time he got REALLY into that girl and then disappeared for a weekish and never mentioned her again. (His college friends thought it was a rocky break up. They are now realizing it was b/c he was on trial for murder what the fuck Phoenix.) Or in high school he got weirdly into Legally Blonde but everyone just thought he was being a theater kid and was excited that the musical had come out. But Phoenix always seemed like such a normal guy that none of his friends thought that deeply about it and now they are and well fuck.

So they DM him in their group chats and his response is completely normal too. Phoenix sees nothing weird about what he's been doing oh and how are the children Susie? He's perfectly friendly, just like they remember, and seems to think nothing of how off the rails his legal career's gone. That's when everyone finally acknowledges he is really the craziest person they know (and maybe make a separate GC to discuss What The Fuck Is Phoenix Doing Now).

Hope that made sense! I do like thinking about how "normal" Phoenix was for years - it makes the unhinged shit he does later so much funnier and I think really fits with his character? And thanks for all the asks (also sorry it takes me so long to get to these; I've just been kinda busy)!! Lmao love any opportunity to talk about how Unwell Phoenix actually is. <3

#tom talks #anon #ace attorney #phoenix wright #miles edgeworth #adrian andrews #just imagining phoenix from the POV of a law school classmate is so funny to me #like imagine the most normal friend you have #and then years later you find out he's been doing what phoenix has been doing #how would you respond #it'd be so funny i'd go insane personally

[patchesproblem]

I was rambling about this earlier on twitter but it's easier to type and explain myself on here so!!! This is about my AU, so if you're confused that's why lmao.

Rambling mainly about Tesla and Karl tbh.

So with Karl and Welt making their appearance I got to thinking about all of the characters relationships with each other, and I've come to an amazing realization.

So I was thinking.. How would Tesla and Karl get along?

NOW one of the things I want to note before this is that Karl would probably care about her either way. He's just the caring dad figure who never knows what's happening and I love him for it. However, I feel like over time he slowly gains her trust to the point he's basically become Tesla's father figure that she never had.

Like in game Tesla has trust issues, for good reasons. AND just like in game she will relentlessly bully and harass any man in her sights just for the funsies. In conclusion she does not trust any man within a billion mile radius of her. So it would take awhile for her to actually trust Karl enough to actually open up.

I feel Karl was probably extremely concerned about her, and just over time slowly gained her trust enough to where she'd at least kinda talk to him. How he exactly gained her trust, honestly not sure. I feel like she could just tell that he wasn't malicious by the way he acted, and probably what she heard about him from Einstein. I'd say she trusted things Welt said, but honestly she doesn't lmao. Just like siblings they're at each others throats every other day and they refuse to trust a word the other says. (They care about each other. They just also want to kill the other sometimes. Yanno, just sibling things.)

As for their relationship, I feel like he's probably one of the only people she actually trusts. Basically she only completely trusts him and Einstein, to put it plainly lmao. He treats her and Einstein like his own and he'd probably drop anything if they need help or anything.

I think he was probably the first, if only, person she ever fully opened up to about what's happened in her life. Not even in a "lol I have issues" way, but legitimately was actually honest about everything without just brushing it off.

A little idea that I thought of earlier is that Karl was probably the first person Tesla talked too when she finally came to terms with the fact she'd grown to like Ein just because she trusted him enough to not completely ridicule her or shame her. Tbh he probably helped her get through it because I feel like Plancks relentless teasing, although isn't inherently malicious, probably affected her way more than she meant to. Bonus points if Karl never even brought it up to her or said anything about it unless she was talking about it to him, and even at that he never teased or really shamed her.

His first reaction was probably just confusion tbh. Like why is this child upset because they like their friend. Then the realization hit him and he's just like "Oh. You know that explains a lot actually."

Mans probably just pretended it never happened and doesn't even act like he knows anything. Complete opposite of Planck essentially LMAO-

Also just had an idea that he occasionally gets dragged along by Tes and Ein to help them with some experiment. It has back fired a few times, yet he still goes to help them just because. Probably comes to visit them when they go to lab 42 tbh.

None of this probably sounds coherent but also I'm just throwing thoughts into the void so it's okay. End of rant, I'll be back later probably.

#tesla #karl gustav #honkai impact 3rd #au #literally they've just been living rent free in my head #along with Ein and Karls interactions #I love them so much #I am not okay for the record #patches rambles #nikolas posts

[hotdogdynamitezzz]

I am sorry for this late feedback but something more important came up in personal life.

I truly agree with what you said that I will be going through a lot of personal transformations because I am. Everything that I used to believe in before, is slowly shattering down and it feels too sudden? I do want the good things for myself but the pace at which all these are happening, makes me distressed. I have started to keep less expectations from people/friends in general and this protects me from getting hurt. Also, yeah, i am charging ahead towards my goals in life , they are far now but i feel like i will be getting close to them soon. I am not the person that I used to be before and sometimes it shocks me but eventually i know that it will help me in the long run. I haven't been through a breakup, so i guess it means changing old patterns and coming out of them. Even though, i wanted something " lovey dovey" in my solar chart but i guess that's not important in my life right now.

Thank you so much for the reading, it was really helpful and insightful ✨

Hello! Omg don't apologize for the late feedback, I appreciate you even coming here to give me such personal thoughts and details. It was so honest I was really touched by what you've said. Touched as in I feel like crying with you cuz Ik how scary it is to have so many things breaking apart quickly and you don't feel ready :( and I wish I could give you a hug rn omg. It is super distressing and it sucks feeling like you have to change in order to be happy so you can protect yourself. That part really hit deep tbh, but I want you to know you don't have to stay guarded to protect your heart even though it feels like the only option rn. Staying true to yourself and keeping your peace protects your heart enough. I know you feel so shattered from everything you've gone through and it seems like you're going through a tower moment rn and seeking emotional shelter if that makes sense? Just something to keep your heart safe because you can't take anymore after everything you've gone through at once. It is overwhelming when this happens, it does feel as if you're breaking apart and no one can help. But those you've trusted and have stayed by your side during this you can always trust. Ik it can even be hard and draining to just talk to others when you go through these events and it seems neverending :( but it will come to an end and you will be able to keep your heart safe and your peace.

I'm not at all surprised you were hoping for a more lovey dovey year because honestly whenever I see a lot of change and turmoil present in charts I also hope they have a year filled with more love. Because that's when you really need it the most. So I'm hoping love does come your way this year and I'm wrong 🥺.

I think you will discover a lot of goals and be put on the path of what you're meant to do this year and that's beautiful. I'm happy that at least one good thing can be seen coming out of this year, it gives you strength and hope when you can see yourself getting close to them and that's sooo important for this development and painful growing stage in your life.

I'm seriously sending you so much love and hugs rn🫂🫂

This has been the most special feedback ever. This is totally unrelated but I had a really emotional dream last night and it was probably close to when this ask was sent because I woke up and fell back asleep around 5am my time and when I checked my tumblr this ask wasn't sent yet but when I woke up it was. The reason I bring this up is because I can't remember the dream exactly but it had to do with myself and this strange random man I've never seen before that turned on me and I felt really broken. He made me feel very threatened in a way? Like I couldn't turn to anyone for help. It had some fantasy elements to it as well but I can't really remember. It was a weird dream where he felt like the one for me but then all of a sudden turned on me and vanished. And for some reason in this dream others hated me too? I remember one part rn where I fell off a cliff and sunk into the water feeling unseen and suffocated? Basically I woke up wanting to cry because I felt so alone in this dream.

I just wanted to share that with you because I felt an emotional connection through this ask. I hope I'm not coming off as opportunistic or manipulative because I know some people say those things to take advantage of others. But genuinely that dream really struck me and it was such a similar feeling to your ask so I had to tell you about it.

I'm rooting for you and sending so much love and hugs🫂🫂💖💖💖💖💖 I'm really grateful for this special feedback, I wouldn't even call it feedback because it sounds so business-like and this feels way more meaningful. Sending you the best of luck to fight through this year and hopefully love will come your way.

(I'm also decorating this ask with the vibe I get from you and sending you beautiful angel numbers in the aesthetic that I feel for your current situation 💕 I'm seriously going to look back at this ask and think about it a lot. It's just a really meaningful ask for me)

#asks #ask game #astro asks #ask blog

[birdantlers]

18 and 19 for the ask game por favor please

(I forgot to copy them but basically these asked your opinions on GT and super)

18. I have seen two episodes of GT, however I do know the general synopsis/arc plots.

My first exposure to gt was a bit tarnished because even though it made little sense to do so, Nick aired it like the WEEK after Kai ended. So GT came immediately after cell saga, which was so inconsistent and confusing to kid-me that I just didn't watch it after the premiere lol.

I get that Kai Final Chapters didn't exist at the time, but tbh I would have rather they just not aired GT at all. Because rather than just having the end of Kai hit me with the full force of a finale, I just thought the story was continuing seamlessly at the time. Also that meant I got gradually more bitter as they slowly stopped airing Kai in favor of GT haha.

First impressions aside though, GT does have some ideas that I like, and I do want to watch it in full someday. I also tuned in to watch the episode where Piccolo dies (bc I happened to catch the bumper for it woo) and I really like that scene. So much so that I still have a fully scripted pmv about it.

GT has a lot of irritating drawbacks like pacing, lack of conviction for a lot of stuff that happens, and very limited spotlight on the wider cast (why is Goku the mc again for fucksake please pass the torch already) but it does interest me.

Also trunks can rock a butch fit and thems facts ok. Gender envy

19. I have not seen Super. I've seen some of the movies, and I tried to read the manga recently, but reading dragonball is not as investing to me as watching it. I think it's a combination of my woeful attention span and just personal preference. That being said, I do know generally what happens. Just less so than GT

I'm gonna be honest, the visuals are the biggest biggest turnoff for me. It just doesn't look like dragon ball—or sound like it, for that matter. I know very well about the complications with production and the abuse the animators suffered, but that doesn't change the fact that when I see characters' busted faces and godawful proportions and bad color palette,, I just can't get invested. It literally takes me out of the moment. I'm glad that it gets better later on, but man it gives me like. DB uncanny valley lmao.

Also I must be honest, I'm just not super invested in what the story puts forward. I'm beyond tired of Goku and Vegeta-centric stuff even without having seen Super, and some story choices are made that make me roll my eyes. Gohan's characterization in particular, as well as the whole Mai debacle.

I do like the slightly more laid back slice-of-life tone, and seeing how close the characters have clearly grown over the years is really sweet. But when there's Frieza and alternate universes and gods and crushing power crawl and whatever else, I just.. don't care, man. I know it's a shonen, but I need more emotion in my stories than what I've come to understand DBS has.

OGDB's tone and scale is vastly different, so this isn't as much of an issue with that, but long about the middle of Buu saga, I really began to understand how vital it was to have a character like Gohan as a lens for the plot. Whether intentional or not, he brought a lot of emotion and very needed.. sort of somberness to DBZ. Imo, he was the emotional core of it. He wasn't the only one, but it's very clear that DBZ's objective was to show his maturation.

Even if Toriyama wanting to end DB at cell saga is a rumor, I still think Cell saga makes for the better ending because it's a completion of Gohan's arc that really hammers home the passage of time into a new age. Then Buu saga implies that it's going to keep going in that direction, only to backpedal and make it about Goku and Vegeta again.

Even though Vegeta's arc was wrapped up in Buu saga, that's kind of where my investment in his character ends. He's not a bad character, but from what I understand his arc in super is pretty derivative and almost a repetition. I'm sure Vegeta fans love it, but the simple fact is I'm not a Vegeta fan. Or at least, my enjoyment of the show isnt dependent on him. Or Goku—though I honestly think Goku has been underutilized if you can believe it. Specifically in terms of an emotional arc.

I really wish he and other characters would be given struggles, doubts, fears, conflict, etc that DON'T solely stem from fighting or an opponent or their strength or what-have-you. I really want more depth and introspection in DB (and it's there! I promise you it's there and you don't even have to break the show's vibe to portray it), but I'm not expecting anything much.

DB is stagnating Hard to me, which was part of why DBSSH was such a breath of fresh air..... Even though it still fumbled the ball with it's emotional throughlines but that's an Entirely different tangent too long for Tumblr tbh. It gave the more neglected characters a chance to breathe and have their own story, and it at least presented some ideas for some various character-driven emotional arcs,,, kind of. Maybe it was an accident bc idk it sure feels like it at times. But it at the very least gave me hope.

Dragon ball has to shake things up and get some fresh eyes on the ball if it's ever going to be as resonant as Z or ogdb imo. I desperately wish it would start taking itself more seriously and introduce more cerebral and challenging ideas, but afaik that's not what's been going on. So I have yet to get around to catching up on Super.

#ask #my writing #dbz #dbs #dragon ball super #skit yells

[miku-life-tips]

yk what, fuck it, all of them, 1-50

 Do you have freckles?  Yes, several, I've had only two for as long as I can remember, the rest have slowly come in over time

 Do you drink tea or coffee? How do you take it?  Hate both, coffee smells disgusting, sweet tea turned me off tea

What was the last song you listened to?  Currently listen to Creek, Thunder by The Reverent Marigold

Do you sleep on your back, stomach or side? Yes, no, yes. I get ill if I sleep on my stomach, it's odd

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?  Several currently, but the main one is from 10 years ago! Almost 11 now! She is a pink poodle named Bubbles

Do you prefer drawing or writing?  Writing, I'm not the best at drawing, but I have years of writing experiences so I think I'm pretty decent :D

What’s your ideal number of blankets to sleep with? Depends, either 2 or 3, 2 if it's hot, 3 if it's not. (Younger me would say just the comforter)

What’s your favorite band/artist? Whatever Spotify shows me rn!

When is your birthday? You will know when it is because I will 100% post like Its my Birthday :D But October 19th lol

How tall are you? 5'1, am short

What color are your eyes? Blue, at least that's what my ID says :D

Who are five (or more) people you want to hug right now? No one! Already hugged my mom today :D

Fears? Several! Spiders, deep water, irl social interaction, needles for example

What’s your favorite color? Purple, blue, black, red, any really tbh

What’s your favorite season? Ah. I don't know. Spring or Winter

Want any tattoos? What of? I'm good without! lol

Want any piercings? Where? Not really already got the standard ears ones (though. one is closed now. The other got reopened by a bee)

Who is the last person you texted? My friend!

Do you have a best friend? How long have you been friends? I have 2! One since Elementary School (3rd grade to be exact), the other since Middle School (7th I think)

What/who do you miss? I've been missing a lot of things recently. I don't really know exactly what yet though

How was your day today? It was Ok, work is work lol 

How much sleep did you get last night? None! I work night shift lol

Answered Already!

When was the last time you cried? Why? When the video about Technoblade came out.

What’s your favorite decade?  I like the 2000s, like 2010 and stuff

What are some seemingly childish things you like?  Stuffed animals, dressing up, toys

What’s your favorite book? Or just one you’ve read a few times? The Treasure Box by Penelope J. Stokes!

How are you, really? Tired...

Does it take you a long time to make decisions?  Sometimes! It depends :D

Answered Already!

What are you looking forward to in the distant future? I'd rather not think about it!

If you could go anywhere right now, where would you go?  Anywhere? I'm not sure tbh

Do you sleep with your door open or closed? Have to lol, the animals

What’s your favorite flower? I love Lilies of the Valley!

Do you currently have a squish? I don't know what that means!

Do you like your middle name? Yeah :D 

Do you prefer dogs or cats? I like cats a bit more

Do you have any phobias? Aren't fears and phobias the same?

Do you stay up late? I work night shift!

Do you like the beach? Do you prefer it sunny or cloudy? Ugh no, hate sand 

What’s your favorite cartoon? I like Gravity Falls, Hilda, and Centaur World :D

Tag 5 of your favorite blogs I don't want to bother anyone >.<

Do you have siblings? How many? Yes, 2. I am the youngest 

Who was the last person you said “I love you” to? Probably my mom! I say it a lot

Is there anyone you would die for? Ah, probably not >.< Dont like the idea of dying tbh 

What do you need when you’re sad?  A hug, reassurance

Have you memorized your phone number? Nope!

Who’s someone you can trust with your life? My friend! She knows who she is!

What does your last text say?  I love him (It was about Genshin Character Thoma)

Wild Card. Any question, ask away.  I already answered 49, what more is there lol

#long post

[72000]

idk how to even look at my "profile" anymore

I lied when i said i would post more art here. I didnt really, and i havent, really. I still do prints, I still do music. I sometimes do videos. I post on instagram to the two people who love me and see them in person first. https://www.instagram.com/d722220

instead i will throw 200 words you.

I have decided to listen thru all of Prince's discography. I've fallen in love with every single one so far (For You, Prince, Dirty Mind, Controversy, 1999, Purple Rain, Around the World in a Day) EXCEPT for Parade. still revisiting but its not grabbing like the others did. I did not like Dirty Mind at first. I also didnt care for Around the World in a Day, but both i have come full circle on. Particularly ATWIAD. I am now in love with them and Do Me, Baby is a perfect song. It's funny to think (and read) that people weren't crazy at ATWIAD when it came out and last 3 songs are an incredible run (Pop Life, The Ladder, Temptation). It is also over started how Purple Rain is a 10/10 perfect album but let me be the 249,406 person to tell you that it's a perfect album. I was moved to tears on the first listen. Very few albums have done that (Kate Bush Hounds of Love being an example duh). Decided to take on this task on a whim and I'm so in love.

I had also decided to revisit and continue listening through Alan Vega's discography. Once again, 10 years ago when i first heard Just a Million Dreams i HATED IT. a lot. its so vastly different from anything Suicide related, and though you could say the same for the first few Vega solo albums, something about JAMD irked me. I even liked Saturn Drive more. I revisited it last week and only days later drove to the record shop to buy it, I NEEDED IT. it's really fucked up he could start as protopunk protoindustrial w Suicide then do rockabilly (S/T - collision Drive) dance pop and dance rock, then go totally avant garde(?) once you hit Deuce Avenue. it's still dance oriented but not in the same way Saturn Drive and JAMD are.

I cannot lie I love dance music. I also picked up Sheila E. " The Glamourous Life" and Nik Kershaw "Human Racing". I love dance music. The last haul was Toni Braxton first album (s/t ?) and The Time s/t.

Other than that I've slowly been working my way through Dean Blunt discography. (pattern?) I made it through Jill Scott Herring OST and Narcissist II but once I hit The Redeemer something in me knew I liked it but I couldnt articulate why. Still kinda can't tbh. after the 3rd listen it finally clicked and I "got it". The only thing I didn't care for up to this point is the last song Gass on Babyfather. I've only made it up to Walhalla. I'd always seen BLACK METAL be a topic of discussion any time his name is brought up but The Redeemer is the one I come back to the most. time will tell.

The funny thing is i live alone and have been for almost a year now and normally I would come home and throw 1000 words at my then roommate about what I'd been listening to and what I thought. Now that I can't do that maybe I'll bring it here. maybe I won't. maybe I'll delete this out of some sort of weird humility and temporary attempt at pretending to be elusive ?

I keep track of full albums I listen to on a monthly basis a la Topsters so maybe I'll start posting them here. Nobody will see this and I feel like posting them to twitter is a little to revealing. I've been kinda showing my ass lately.

how many words was that ?

9/25/23

#prince #sheila e #the time #dean blunt #alan vega

[watchyourdigits]

oh no

I'm having a really hard time writing the next chapter of my Mac/Eve fic. like... ouchh. I am frustrated beyond belief at this point.

Somehow I've managed to lose all of the Evelyn momentum and have completely lost my characterization of her. Like, she's already slipping through my fingers and I'm literally on chapter five (5). This is incredibly fucking tragic and unlike anything I've ever experienced with Frankie and Danse.

Like, with the other fic I'm working on, Frankie is very multi-faceted, but he's also openly so. Evelyn is multi-faceted, but a lot more tormented at her core so she'd very *tight* and generally hard to read.

(TW: mentions of abuse ahead)

Not to mention, she's explored entirely through MacCready's observance of her. Frankie just kind of gets to exist as himself, unrestricted for the most part. I've long since opened up any "hidden" parts of him, thought they weren't central to his personality per se. Like, he is who he says he is and nothing less. Frankie was only hiding where he came from. Whereas Evelyn is hiding HERSELF as a whole (though not really tbh because she doesn't know who she even is).

She's breaking down far too quickly and I'm forgetting how to write her as the closed book, "rage and fury are my only emotions" character she's intended to be at this point. She's hard to love and very hesitant to reciprocate in kind, but MacCready is absolutely entranced with her. He finds beauty in the way she moves and how she holds herself in the world. She's brutal, but effortlessly so. She's learned how to preserve herself in the face of her many traumas. He's supposed to peel back her layers, getting under her skin in ways she doesn't anticipate, and slowly discover who SHE is even if she doesn't realize it herself yet.

It's a mutual journey, one they have together, because Mac just being so unashamedly himself rubs off on her. She realizes the possibility of just letting oneself experience and enjoy things for the sake of it. She's basically discovering the world (and herself) through him and his occasionally childlike affinities. All the while, he bears witness to her pain through the way she razes everything around her to the ground in a desperate ploy to feel like she has SOME semblance of control.

It's meant to be tragic and painful, because this is a story based on healing and creating oneself from scratch basically (specifically after suffering long-term abuse). And it's also deeply personal to my own life and current relationship vs my past ones. Like, I'm still working on coming out of my shell and finding who I am. And this is the better half of a decade AFTER my own abuse. This fic has been very therapeutic to work on, but from the perspective of characterization I'm losing Eve and it's killing me.

I think the only way to proceed is to retain the basic Sole Survivor backstory, but remove Shaun from the equation entirely as it's putting too much pressure to move the story along. The character development is meant to take place over a longer period of time, with Stuff happening that drives it home, yet I feel it's moving way too fast due to the plot in and of itself.

Of course I want the Institute to be a central Bad Guy, but this needs to all unfold over the course of about two years. Like, preparations for war and all that don't happen overnight. For example, the Brotherhood rebuilding Prime as a relatively new faction in the Commonwealth with little to no outside help is something that, in real time, would take years. I think a group like the RR or Minutemen who don't have some major War Machine to rebuild could prepare in less time than that, but still.

It's already been a few months time in my fic and I'm like ???? this isn't working for me. I always feel the plot breathing down my neck and it's really ruining this fic in particular 🫡🫡

#regg rambles #regg writes #sorry this is a long ass post but im beyond DONE writing this fic at this point #fic: raise hell

[zealoussy]

2023 Midyear Freakout Book Tag

It is time to look back to all of the books I've read for the past 6 months (!!!). I just want to do this for myself but anyone who wants to join, consider yourself tagged!

Best book you've read so far in 2023. This is a difficult one because I have never been not indecisive all my life. But. I think I will settle with No Longer Human by Osamu Dazai. I love how Dazai slowly working through Oba Yozo's mental deterioration. Obviously he's not likeable, but you'll be able to empathize with him from following the turbulence that is his mind. This book is the best way to show people the "ugly" side of mental illness. People need to realize that mental illness isn't only about the most instragammable things you can do, but it is also being the worst version of yourself. Other than that, how the narrative makes its way to connect to the title is cleverly done. It feels so seamless.

Best sequel you've read so far in 2023. I'm not a series reader, tbh. So I will go with The Sandman Vol. 5: A Game of You by Neil Gaiman. Although not my favorite of the series, I did enjoy reading that. In this volume, we meet Barbie! Turns out she's a princess some lifetime ago?? It's really interesting and surprisingly poignant.

Favourite re-read. Easy question, it's White Nights by Fyodor Dostoevsky. How is it still heartbreaking, even though I know what comes next in the story? That's Dostoevsky's specialty, I think. Making stories that's so painful no matter how much you reread it, it still gives you pain.

Genre you've been loving/reading the most. I've been having a lot of fun reading graphic novels this year so far! Reading graphic novels is the most magical form of experiencing work of literature. For fantasy especially, it feels like I forget I ever existed on Earth when reading them. Most of them are fast-paced and medium-paced so I'd recommend anyone to pick any title up if you want to read when waiting something, or not in the mood to digest books slowly.

New release you haven't read yet, but want to. Monstrilio by Gerardo Sámano Córdova. It just came out last month so I still have a lot of time to read it. The summary sounds intriguing and I've seen a few of my book-ish friends wanting to read it too. Hopefully I can read that before the year ends!

Most anticipated release for the second half of the year. I don't have one, honestly. I'm not the type of person that follows news release that much, so yeah that's my answer.

Biggest disappointment. The Stranger - Albert Camus. I was so excited for this book. I have been saving that title since last year. Thank god I didn't buy the physical copy. Like, I get the book. But its' SO boring. I don't enjoy it.

Biggest surprise. Everyone in this Room Will Someday Be Dead by Emily Austin. Oh, this is an interesting one. Because I started this book last year impulsively, but then it was kinda rotting in my piles of CRs. But one day I decided, you know what, let's finished this book. And I was surprised that I like it. I even teared up a little at the end. I never thought it will be a profound book that shines light to what religious trauma can do to a person. The story is told in ironic and darkly humorous way, which is very funny if you're mentally ill. Yet it's also crushing, how the main character describe her despair. Such a marvelous read.

Favorite new author (debut/new to you). Oliver Jeffers. He's an author, illustrator for picture book fiction. Last year I read The Heart and The Bottle, which absolutely broke me to pieces, and this week I read What We'll Build and it makes me want to cry a river. So I'll definitely check out his other books.

Newest Favorite Character. Oh, God. I have two answer to this but I think I'll pick Jean-Baptiste Grenouille from Das Parfum for this one. Reason? Because he's a sopping wet little meow meow.

Book that made you cry. Uhh I don't know how it happened, but it's The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger got me sobbing???? The last part of the book, yeah. Just. I don't know. I'm just so fond of Holden Caulfield, I want to give him a hug, the best hug, making him soup if he's sick, staying all night if he want to talk, like I want to protect him at all cost.

Books that made you happy. My Beijing: Four Stories of Everyday Wonders by Nie Jun. It's free time travel to my childhood and free therapy. I need that child-like wonders and excitement dose if I want to survive this year.

Most beautiful book you've bought so far this year. Most of my reads are digital, but I'll mention Mamo by Sas Milledge as one of the most beautiful book I've read this year so far. The art style is so breathtaking. It added the whimsical story line even more alive.

What books do you need to read by the end of the year? So much books, so little time. I'll be happy with myself if I can manage to read any of Toni Morrison's books. I've been wanting to read her books but I'm just kinda intimidated lol.

#book tag #midyear freakout book tag #adablabbooks #bookblr

[p-antomime]

i will, my love.

— minors don't interact.

— wc: 4K.

content + warnings: 18+, including: soft dom!suna, pet names, fingering, oral (female), unprotected sex, worship, really soft sex tbh, virginity loss

pairings: boyfriend!suna rintarō x virgin!fem!reader

— haikyuu masterlist.

Your thoughts were eating you up inside. But not quickly, in a way that hardly hurt your soul, but, yes, too slowly, because of this, naturally your body started to work that much harder to get to the end of the day exhausted so that there was no opening for you to think about it.

Y/N was not entirely sure that her boyfriend realized this, but considering how observant he is, it was naturally possible that he was just waiting for a good opportunity to bring up the subject and find out what was making "his princess" so uncomfortable.

In reality, your fear was that Suna thought that the problem was something involving you, or worse, that you were about to break up with him after a long 1 year and four months of dating, but the problem was more specific and, for you, secretly more embarrassing, especially when your friends told you that "you are too old to be a virgin". Every time the group of friends of the two of you got into the subject of "sex life", you walked away and made up a bad excuse to leave the place, sometimes taking Suna along or sometimes leaving him behind; and the few times when there was no way out and the two of you were put up against the wall, Suna would reply that "you're both waiting for the right time" and you could see the look of disappointment not in him, but in his friends.

Suna was extremely patient with you, and although you actually thought it was the least he could do for you as the person he loves, your mind persisted in whispering in your ear that he would get tired of waiting. It wasn't as if Y/N was a holy prude, far from it, but every time he tried to comfort you with his arms around your body while his lips were pressed against yours in a deep and intense kiss and his hips thrust against yours in an attempt to demonstrate that his body needed yours, you felt too eager and refused to move forward with that brief signal; and all these times you could hear Suna in the bathroom using his own hand to masturbate because the walls were so thin in the apartment shared between you and your classmate.

Did you feel guilty for not fucking him during all this time of dating? No... until last week when a girl approached him while you and his friends were leaving for the movies and asked if she could have his number. It wasn't as if Suna had paid any attention to the girl, but you felt as if there were thousands of young girls your age or older ready to give him anything he wanted in a matter of minutes, especially to let you slip between their legs without a care in the world.

And today was the day when Y/N had the day off to do whatever he and his roommate wanted, so it turned out that it didn't take long for Suna Rintarou to be lazily lying on the couch in the living room of the apartment shared between his girlfriend and another girl from her college course while you were looking for a movie for both of you to watch. You could feel his watchful, calm gaze glued to your back, but your body didn't want to turn around to face him.

— What is it? — You asked, still looking at the TV remote control.

— You seem strange these days. — He said, in the same eerily calm tone he always used, he was trying to get you against the wall by using the same old words so as not to make you feel afraid.

— Do I? — It was obvious that you were going to try to talk him out of it, and it wasn't long before you heard a rustle behind you that indicated that Suna was now sitting on the couch instead of lying down, and his hands came down on your shoulders, massaging them lightly; only at that particular moment did you realize how tense they were.

— Do you want to talk about it, or do I need to tear it out of you? I can tickle you until you talk... or kiss you until you suffocate, you choose. — A light laugh escaped his lips and yours fingers briefly unlearned how to flick the TV remote control.

— I've just... been thinking a lot these days, but it's no big deal. — You shrugged your shoulders trying to look nonchalant, but Suna put his hand on your chin and made you face him.

— Really? So, you wouldn't mind repeating that by looking me in the eye, would you? — He raised his eyebrows suggestively, and you frowned.

— You don't believe me?

— Not after watching you act so strange all week, not after yesterday you didn't even want to participate in the video game night at the twins' house. — He leaned his face on her shoulder and frowned. — Tell me what's wrong, and I'll fix it for you. — You bit your lip nervously and chose to look away from the television again. — Has anyone annoyed you this week? Is someone at the college treating you badly? Was it something I did?

Y/N knew that there was a high chance that Suna would throw several questions at her to get to the root of what was being the nuisance as soon as he felt she was comfortable around him, but she didn't expect it to be this soon and that he wouldn't give her time to come up with the slightest plausible excuse.

And after Suna's voice died down, an uneasy, tense silence settled over the room, and you ended up turning around so that you could look at him.

— Does the fact that I didn't want to have sex with you during these months of dating bother you? — It was his turn to feel embarrassed and choke on his own saliva.

— What? — He coughed a few times, feeling as if he had heard you wrong.

— You heard me. — You leaned your arms on his legs and looked at him intently as his calm and serene countenance returned.

— Is this the problem? Lack of sex? I thought you didn't want me to go through with this yet. — His hands brushed against her cheeks and caressed them with his fingertips. — Did you change your mind?

— Answer my question and I'll answer yours.

— It doesn't bother me, really. I will wait for years to have sex with you, if you decide to keep me waiting that long. — Suna answered calmly, and slowly the tension inside you dissolved. — I thought you didn't care so much about this, if you hadn't we would have talked more about it, if you had wanted to.

— I was just... insecure, because you never complain about it, and I feel that your friends look at you like you are with me out of pity every time the topic of "sex" comes up. — Y/N replied returning to focusing on the TV remote. — And... — Her teeth bit the inside of her cheek before her lips whispered more to you than to Suna: —, maybe I changed my mind.

— What, babe? I couldn't hear you properly. — Suna put his arms around your waist and pulled you up, and you felt your cheeks begin to heat up.

— I didn't say anything.

— Repeat what you said before. — His tone dropped an octave and a shiver ran down your back slowly.

— I said I might have changed my mind. — You swallowed hard, staring him straight in the eye for a few seconds before feeling intimidated and staring at the back of the sofa behind him.

— Hmm, really? — Suna rested one hand on your chin while the other rested against your waist to pull you up to sit on his thighs, after which he kissed your lips lightly. — Do you truly want this or are you doing this just because you think it's what I want? — He asked, running his thumb over your lower lip.

— I do. — You answered, shifting into a more comfortable position on his lap and looking down from his eyes to his mouth. — Give me the best of yourself that you can.—  Your hands rested on his shoulders, and the thought of having him freely explore your body made butterflies rise in the pit of your stomach.

— I will, my love. — Suna replied with a slight smile before he really kissed you hard and slowly reached inside your gray tank top with his fingers.

His touch was soft, tender, with fingertips rubbing against the skin of your back slowly, as if massaging it, and then moving down the front of your torso to gently reach your breasts. He was really trying to make you as comfortable as possible, as relaxed as possible, and you couldn't help yourself but have your heart melting under the influence of Suna Rintarou.

When the two of you had to break the kiss because of the missing air, it wasn't long before Suna's lips left wet kisses down your neck and his fingers massaged and squeezed your breasts lovingly before he began to play with your nipples and you gasped because your boyfriend's touch seemed to amplify your own pleasure. It wasn't as if you had never masturbated, quite the opposite in fact, but it was different when another person was touching you.

— Are you sure? — He asked, pulling his lips away from the warm skin of your neck and looking down at you with his hands still around your tits.

— Yes, I'm absolutely sure. — You answered inevitably, forcing your hips against his for more friction. — Please, love. — Your hands reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it up to expose his upper body.

— Great, babe. — Suna kissed your collarbones and rose from the sofa, pulling you along with him, making you clutch his shoulders in despair at the sudden action. — It would suck if your first time with me was on the living room couch, wouldn't it? — You felt your cheeks heat up and lean your head on his shoulder, nodding positively. — You're my princess, so it's only fair that I treat you like one in the bedroom. — And so he carried you to your room, and when he got there, he locked the door and let you lie on the bed looking at your body intently.

As soon as his hands brushed against your tank top and moved it out of the way, Suna was licking and sucking one of your breasts carefully while his other hand squeezed your other nipple, moans escaping from deep in your throat filled the place obscenely and your head fell back against the pillows as your legs opened to better accommodate your boyfriend's body between them.

— Fuck, you are so beautiful. — Suna whispered, sliding his lips down your abdomen and sending a shiver down your back that made you tangle your fingers in his brown hair and try to force your hips up to signal to him where exactly you needed him. — Don't be impatient, I need to take my time with you, it's your first time. — He kissed lightly on the top point of her pelvis and her body shivered.

In the next few seconds, Suna was undoing your thin pajama shorts and leaving you in only your panties while his fingers ghosted down your knees and thighs slowly. The anticipation and expectation were eating you up inside and it was inevitable that high-pitched moans would come from your lips, your body was literally burning for him and your vision seemed about to go blurry at any moment. And he hadn't even done anything sexual with you yet.

— It's so easy to get you horny it's almost cute. — Suna murmured more to himself than to you as he kissed your covered pussy and made you squirm.

Over the fabric of your panties, he gave you a gentle lick along the entire area of your intimacy before actually moving it out of the way and slowly pushing your folds apart. It was almost as if you had been longing for years to belong to him, and Suna couldn't help himself before grunting and teasing your clit with the tip of his tongue. The wave of pleasure that washed over your body was intense enough to make you arch your back painfully and pull his hair tightly as loud moans came from your lips.

— So sweet, I've been thinking about your pussy for so long. — Suna said before he gave a few more licks against your intimacy and entered your interior with just one finger slowly, but he stopped in the middle of the process when he heard a low grunt of pain coming from you, probably because his finger was longer than yours and reached places that had not been widened before. — Tell me if it hurts too much, I can go slower on you, my love. — He kissed your inner left thigh lightly and slowly continued to put his finger in, only to let you get used to it.

— Can you move... please? — You asked breathlessly, propping yourself up on your elbows.

— Sure. — Suna answered with a loving look before he began to move his finger slowly inside you and feeling his own arousal increase as he saw your face contort with pleasure before your head fell back again.

As he increased the speed of that single finger and analyzed your expressions of pleasure and your thrusts of trying to force your hips up for more friction, Suna slowly introduced a second digit into you and massaged your clit with the thumb of that same hand. His lips left biting and sucking on your thighs with no intention of actually marking them, only to make you lose yourself further in pure lust. Minutes later, when your moans already indicated that your insides had gotten used to the widening of two fingers, a third one was introduced and slowly your boyfriend began to really build up a rhythm that made your mind forget absolutely everything. There was only: Suna Rintarou and his ambition to make you feel good.

— Damn, you're so beautiful, I could pleasure you for hours and never get tired of looking at your beautiful face. You're my pretty girl, aren't you? — You couldn't formulate a coherent sentence, not when his fingers were curving in that overpowering way inside you. — Always so good for me, so sweet for me. — Suna took your clit between his lips gently before he began to use his fingers to make scissor-like movements to widen your insides as much as possible.

— Fuck, babe... — You gasped, feeling the same pressure in your lower abdomen that was present every time you were about to cum using your own fingers. — It's s-so good, please... I... — Your train of thought short-circuited as your boyfriend's licks on your clit became more consistent and responsive, your hips thrusting upward frantically.

— Yes, my love, I know, cum for me. I know you want to. — He responded by increasing the speed of the fingers inside you.

A few more thrusts widening your insides were enough to have you collapsing against your boyfriend's body, breath panting, eyes rolling and hands desperately trying to grab hold of any piece of his skin you could get your hands on. You were finished, to say the least. The feeling of having someone making you cum, especially with fingers much longer than yours own, was overwhelmingly different than having you touch yourself. Suna had never pleasured you in that direct way before, so he needed to assess your expressions and body language to know what made you most comfortable, but it only took seconds before he adjusted the right pressure and rhythm to have you completely melting.

— You're such a good girl to me, I love you. — Your boyfriend slowly withdrew his fingers from inside you and moved from between your legs to plant kisses on the surface of your belly while complimenting you in the best possible ways, even though your mind was too busy recovering from the recent orgasm to actually pay attention to what Suna was saying. — Do you think you can handle cumming one more time for me, or do you want me to stop? — He asked, holding her face between his hands after leaving several light kisses all over her cheeks and lips.

— I-I can, yes, don't stop. I want more.

— What a good princess. — Suna whispered against yours lips opening a loving smile and it was almost as if it was possible to see hearts drawing in his pupils.

After that, the rest of his clothes were spread out on the floor around the bed and maybe, just maybe, an apprehension settled inside you as your eyes traveled down your boyfriend's athletic and now naked body and found the length of his cock. He was definitely above average and this made you unconsciously drag your body away a little, which did not go unnoticed by Suna, who put his hands on your lower back and squeezed it lightly as if to reassure you.

— Do you trust me? — He asked, leaning over your body and pulling you close again, your response was a slight positive nod. — If I said it wouldn't hurt, I'd be lying, but if you need me to stop, let me know. Don't be afraid to let me know everything you're feeling, okay, my love?

You responded with a minimal "Yes, Suna" to him and rested your hands on his shoulders, inevitably digging your nails into them as you felt him spread your legs to wrap them around his waist and place the tip of his cock against your entrance. He rubbed his cock between your folds a few times before holding you firmly and slowly invading your interior. You could feel every inch, every vein, but for the first few seconds the pain overpowered the pleasure and small tears rolled down your cheeks. You felt extremely breathless, as if your body was going to break, so Suna leaned over your body to wipe away yours tears with kisses and leaned his forehead against yours without being able to hold back a low grunt from the pleasure of having you squeeze him hard and the pain of feeling your nails raking the skin of his shoulders.

— My beautiful girl, relax, trust me. — He whispered, sliding his mouth down your neck and massaging your back gently. — You can relax for me, can't you? You can be a good girl for me, can't you? — His eyes were staring into yours seriously.

— Y-Yes, Suna, I can... just... — Your breath caught in throat as you felt him slowly continue to fill your insides until he could make you swallow him down. — Give me a few minutes, I'll be your good girl.

— Of course you will. — Suna stood completely still inside you, kissed your collarbones and licked your breasts lightly, never stoping to massage your lower back to give you the comfort he knew you needed.

Leaning your head against the pillows, you concentrated on making the feeling of discomfort and pain gradually disappear. Slowly your body began to move back and forth until you became accustomed to the presence of Suna's cock stretching you completely. Yours senses began to want more of that pleasurable impact, and soon the same spasms as before began to run through your back again.

— S-Suna? — You called him slyly and in a slurred voice. — C-Can you move, please?

— Sure, babe, anything for you. — He pulled you into a deep, loveable kiss before holding your face between his hands and beginning to move inside you, he was trying to analyze your expressions before he began to build up a proper pace.

Suna found that his girlfriend liked it too much when he arched his hips and came hard inside her, but came out slowly, in contrasting movements, so he did this several times just to see you squirming and begging for more of him. It was music to his ears. Your boyfriend's hands lodged around your waist and assisted you in moving back and forth on his dick as his knees rested against the mattress of the bed. At no time did he stop worshipping you and calling you affectionate nicknames through whispers in yours ears that would hardly be heard outside the room because of the sound of the bed banging against the wall and the moans coming out of your mouth.

The pleasure was overwhelming all of your ability to think rationally and yours lips were too busy alternating between giving lewd kisses against Suna's and taking light bites all over his neck. You could literally feel every bit of his skin against yours and it was driving you madder than you could or wanted to admit. The words of love he whispered to you were the complete opposite of his deep, strong thrusts inside you. But, as the minutes passed and your own boyfriend couldn't contain the erratic movements of his cock inside you, he switched positions leaving you on top of him. For the first few seconds your body almost came to a complete standstill with the new depth attained by his entire length and you couldn't help having curses come out of your mouth.

— I-It's so good... — Your body moved up and down against his cock slowly, wanting to prolong that feeling of having him stretching you. Watching you intently, Suna thrusts hard while holding your hips and moaned in unison with you because of the delicious sensation.

— Damn, you're so tight, you take me so well. — He pulled your torso to lean against his and let you partially lie on his body before he began thrusting himself deep inside you, hitting all the right spots inside you.

Everything about him seemed to push you to climax faster than you thought possible. Face flushed slightly, chest rising and falling rapidly, eyes half-closed, shoulders tense and mouth ajar to try to draw in more air. He looked more handsome than usual and completely given to you. That was definitely the man of your life; that's what was resonating in your mind as the tip of Suna's cock began to rub against your cervix and make you lose your head completely, finally reaching your second orgasm that had already left your senses bewildered, considering it was only your first time.

Suna still had so much to show you, he'd be lying if he said he wasn't excited by the idea of helping you figure out what you liked and didn't like about sex, but by now you were exhausted, so he ended up giving you just a few more thrusts against your walls that squeezed him deliciously before he pulled out and ended up cumming all over his own abdomen and soiling your thighs with some of his cum as well. You staggered to the side and he quickly helped you lie down on the bed as comfortably as possible, for a few seconds neither of you said anything, your boyfriend wanted you to first get your breath completely back.

— Did I hurt you? — He leaned on your shoulders and looked at you intently. — It was... — You interrupted him with a quick little kiss and smiled fondly.

— It was wonderful, I swear. It was better than I thought it would be, in fact, I thought it would hurt more. — It was hard to see Suna's cheeks flush, and this moment will go down in your memory as one of the few times your boyfriend was embarrassed. — I love you, you're perfect for me.

And after the two of you spent long seconds lying in bed exchanging kisses and caresses, Suna induced you to go take a shower with him to clean yourself and then "you both could do whatever you wanted for the rest of the day", because, he said during the shower:, aftercare was important, especially for "his princess”.

#suna #suna rintarō #suna smut #haikyuu smut #hq #hq suna #i4nanami #hq smut #haikyuu suna #suna rintarou #suna x reader #suna x y/n #suna x you #suna rintarou smut #suna rintaro #suna rintaro x reader

[chosonore]

cynosure

cynosure [noun. one that serves to direct or guide; a center of attraction or attention]

pairing: sukuna/f!reader

summary: in which sukuna re-discovers being human one aspect at a time, through many lifetimes, at the price of losing you over and over.

wordcount: 8.7k

content/warnings: reincarnation au, slow burn but also not really because there's only hints of romance? language, it's not canon at all, just pretend sukuna was never sealed away, lowercase is intended

a/n: this is more self-indulgent tbh sukuna is probably uncharacteristically soft? sometimes i'm reminded of the fact that he used to be human and while we don't exactly know how he became a curse just yet, i kinda felt sad about it lol i'm too sympathetic with everything, it's gonna kill me one day fhuierhfa a lot of these moments are based on my own experiences, where i had to remind myself that even the small things in life are really good and important, especially during the pandemic. that being said, i hope you enjoy and stay safe everyone :) (and please don’t judge me too hard on this lol i haven’t written in like what. six years?)

001.

“oh,” you stared at the tall, pink-haired man in front of you. “i didn’t think anyone would be here around this time…” he stared back at you, not replying nor making any move to scoot over so that you could sit on your bench. it was only then that you noticed the black markings framing his face and adorning his wrists. you were a little dumbfounded - your mother had always said that you had a poor survival instinct. though you supposed that his pink hair eased your nerves a little; surely someone with pink hair couldn’t be as evil. but you couldn’t recall ever seeing someone like this around the proximity of your village. maybe he was a vagrant. 

“i don’t mean to be rude but… that’s my bench and i would appreciate if you could maybe… scooch over?” you asked gingerly, not wanting to upset the stranger. you approached him slowly, grasping your basket tightly. if he got a little rowdy, maybe you could just wack him with the basket, right? although it probably won’t hurt but it surely would stun him long enough for you to run.

“i don’t see why i should move just because it’s your bench,” the stranger answered gruffly, crossing his arms. were you naive or just stupid? “do you not know who you’re talking to, woman?” 

you cocked your head to the side, not sure what he meant. maybe he was one of those famous poets or musicians that your parents liked to talk about. you weren’t entirely sure. even though he sounded annoyed, the look in his eyes didn’t quite match the hostility - he looked rather bored, unamused even, but not hostile. maybe you could humour him a little. “am- am i supposed to know you? i’ve never been outside of the village so i don’t know much. only what the merchants tell me. i apologize if i’ve offended you,” you explained hastily, then pointing at your basket. “i just came here to enjoy the sunrise. um, today is my birthday, so i treated myself to some dessert!”

“if- if you scooch over a litte, i could share some with you…” you tried to bargain with him. now you were truly starting to sound desperate but this was your favourite spot and it was the first time in a while that you had a free day to relax. out of all days, just why did he have to be here now? you’d be damned if you let your day get ruined by this unfriendly stranger. 

“are you trying to bribe me?” the stranger narrowed his eyes at you and you thought this was it. he was going to kill you and bury your body in the forest and your parents would come look for you, only to find your empty basket and then start a huge search party to find you and- the pink haired man moved to the side, refusing to look you in the eyes. “sit.”

you let out a squeak in glee, quickly taking a seat beside him. he watched in silence as you unwrap your desserts, glancing at the objects in question. even though you’d offered to share with him, he didn’t actually expect you to give him some of your food. sukuna was surprised when you handed him a… round squishy thing? 

“what is that? how is that going to satiate me?” he asked, almost offended, which made you giggle. you didn’t reply, instead thrusting the mochi towards him until he begrudgingly took it, closely inspecting it in suspicion. 

“that’s a daifuku mochi. it’s made out of rice flour and filled with red bean paste. but come to think of it… do you even like sweets? i’m sorry if you don’t particularly enjoy it,” you explained and grabbed one as well. you were about to bite into your mochi when you saw the stranger opening his mouth, ready to devour the entire mochi in one go. in horror, you quickly grabbed his wrist to stop him, only to have him suddenly pin you down and tower over you.

“i’m sorry, i’m sorry!” you hastily said, now suddenly aware of the dark, threatening aura that he was emitting. maybe he was a killer after all. “i just didn’t want you to eat it in one go! they’re kind of difficult to eat in one go… plus you’re supposed to savour and enjoy it, take your time eating it!” 

sukuna stared at the girl in disbelief, you’d grabbed him out of nowhere just to stop him from eating too fast? not only were you not aware of who he was, you apparently did not know how to be cautious around strangers. it irked him that you were acting like he was a harmless human being. so much so that he briefly contemplated killing you. “who are you to tell me how to eat?” he growled at you, not softening his grip. he saw the panic and fear in your eyes but for some reason, he couldn’t quite put a finger on it, it didn’t fill him with joy as it usually did.

“i’m just telling you how we usually eat mochi!” you harrumphed, now annoyed that he was acting like you just committed murder. “you didn’t know what these were, so i was just trying to explain! food is supposed to be enjoyed, not ravished all at once. you have to appreciate your food because there might be days where you won’t have any. and besides, enjoying and properly tasting your meal is the least you can do to show gratitude to the person who cooked it for you.” sukuna let up and sat back on his previous spot, seemingly accepting your answer. you sat up, adjusting your yukata and pouted at him. what a rude stranger! you at least expected an apology from him but seeing that he was already taking a bite from his mochi, you guessed you should just let it go. it wasn’t worth getting angry over anyways, not on this day.

“why are you looking at me like that, little girl?” sukuna questioned, taking another bite from his mochi. he did actually enjoy it and it took every bone in his body not to hastily eat more and to savour it like you’d told him to. maybe this wasn’t so bad after all, it made him think about his meals a little more. not eating for the sake of eating, but for enjoyment, he mused. sort of like living for enjoyment, not for the sake of living. 

“you never told me your name,” the girl replied innocently. sukuna sighed. so you really weren’t aware of who he was. “my name is y/n! now it’s only fair if you tell me, especially because i shared my food with you. please?”

before sukuna could reply, he sensed someone quickly approaching. they were hiding somewhere in the forest; it likely was a jujutsu sorcerer, trying to exorcise him. he could deal with them later, but not here, not with you around. the girl looked at him in disappointment when he abruptly stood up, turning towards the forest behind them. unfortunately, he had the inkling that you wouldn’t let it go until he answered: “my name is sukuna, king of curses.” your eyes widened in recognition but you didn’t immediately react or scramble away from him, most likely frozen in fear. 

“now go. someone is coming and you do not want to be in the crossfire.”

002.

as a seamstress, you’ve encountered all kinds of customers. ranging from rude and bratty to eternally grateful, you’ve seen it all. your supervisor had always told you to remain calm and polite, to just adhere to their wishes to not cause any ruckus. after all, people of status often assumed that they were untouchable and could treat others poorly. it wasn’t worth the hassle to start a fight with them, you could lose your job after all. there was moments you’d have to stand up for yourself but this wasn’t it. fortunately, your employer paid you well, enough for you to provide for your family. the customers were high-profile after all.

you looked at the clock on the wall, your next customer was supposed to come soon. it was a nobleman that apparently travelled here from far away, having heard that the store offered beautiful, one of a kind fabrics. you just hope that he wasn’t rude and that you could leave in time. you’d been working overtime for weeks now, taking every appointment and customer that you could get. your mother’s birthday was approaching and you’d been saving up to buy some of the soft and silky fabrics to sew her a new yukata. your mother had always sacrificed her own comfort to buy the best items she could afford for your siblings and you and now that you were older, you could finally treat her to something nice as well. your employer was even willing to give you a small discount and you gratefully took up on her offer.

the chime of the doorbell made you look up, the good feeling in your stomach slowly fading when you saw who entered. you were familiar with the customer after all; he was well known in the area, being a rather volatile and sometimes scary aristocrat who had the reputation to be particularly difficult and having outrageous demands. you hastily stood up, brushing the wrinkles out of your clothing and walking over to greet him. you bowed politely, taking the outerwear that he took off and placing it on a nearby armchair. “sir, i’ll bring you a few samples shortly. do you have any colour or pattern preferences?” you asked him, placing a pot of tea and a cup on the small side table for him to enjoy. you made note of his wishes and disappeared in the storage room to pick up the samples. the customer had made himself at home, eyeing you scrutinizingly. he made you queasy, looking so incredibly unfriendly and you could tell that you were not going home early tonight.

you showed each of the fabrics to him, explaining what materials they were made of and what occasions they were good for but with each explanation, he just looks more and more uninterested. not to mention the snarky remarks he made, seemingly not happy of the choices you presented him. you were running out of options and you didn’t know what else to do to please him when suddenly you heard someone enter the shop. both the customer and you looked over confused - you weren’t expecting any more customers today, it was already late after all. a tall, pink-haired man entered the shop, scowling at your customer. you jumped slightly; he looked scary and you were terrified, not sure what to do in this situation. not only were the black markings on his face and body terrifying, there was also a threatening aura surrounding him, dark and slowly spreading out, all your instincts were screaming at you to run. should you politely ask him to leave? he looked like he wouldn’t take it too well. before you could ask him whether he was looking for something, the stranger spoke up: “you know who i am, leave.”

your eyes widened, slowly inching back towards the back of the store. you were not aware of who this man was but by the looks of your pale-faced customer, he surely did. “this is outrageous!” he exclaimed indignantly, jumping out of his seat. “you can’t just burst in here and demand that i leave! i have an appointment! are you aware of how long the waiting list is? this is the finest shop in the entire prefecture and i would rather die than to give up my spot for a scoundrel like you.” the stranger raised his eyebrows at the shorter man, clicking his tongue in annoyance. you slowly reached out to grab your pair of scissors. they probably weren’t of much use but it made you feel more safe, knowing you could at least somehow defend yourself.

“oh? you would rather die? i’m sure that can be arranged,” the stranger threatened and it was with horror that you watched his fingernails, sharp and pointy, grow in size. he wasn’t human, you’d just encountered a monster. he would kill you and it wouldn’t take him much effort to do so, you were sure he could just stab you with those fingernails. your customer squeaked and left the store in panic, slamming the door in the process, while you quickly hid behind the counter. you hoped he would leave you alone, you didn’t want to get involved. this wasn’t your problem, you were innocent and it was an unfortunate coincidence for you to be here. 

“stop hiding,” the stranger commanded, slowly approaching the counter. you peeked from below the counter, holding your breath. what else could he possibly want from you? demons surely didn’t need money. oh god, was he going to kidnap you?

he swiftly rounded the corner and knelt down to take a closer look at you - you couldn’t react fast enough, he’d already grabbed your chin and made you look at him, turning your head from side to side as he examined you. his fingernails were slightly digging into your skin, making your face scrunch up in discomfort. “so it is you,” he exclaimed in a low voice, then abruptly standing back up. you were confused - what did he mean by that? at least he didn’t kill you, at least not yet. but what else could he possibly want from you? “i need a new kimono. that scumbag just left anyways, make one for me instead.”

a kimono? a simple kimono? you couldn’t believe what you just heard. this demon just came in here, threw a fit but all he wanted was a simple kimono? you couldn’t help but scoff at the situation though it probably was difficult to enter a store without people fleeing or refusing to serve him. while he did look human, the markings on his face made it difficult not to feel threatened. but why did he know you? you had never seen this man in your life before. not in passing, not on drawings, nowhere. no matter how hard you wracked your brain, you just couldn’t recall. “d- do you have any- any colour preference?” you questioned him, watching how he took a seat and grabbed himself the cup of tea. 

“white,” he answered curtly, taking a sip from the tea. “i’ll leave everything else up to you.”

you felt uncomfortable but there was nothing else you could do than follow his orders. you grabbed a few plain white fabric samples and slowly inched over to him, holding them out with your trembling hands. “what?” he deadpanned. you huffed in frustration. 

“sir, you should… you should choose the fabric. it’s your kimono after all, you might not like the feeling of the fabric or it might not be a good fit for your everyday life,” you explained.

“i don’t care, just choose whatever. i’m above the comfort you stupid mortals choose.”

“that’s stupid,” the words left your mouth quicker than you could stop yourself and you slapped your hands over your mouth. the stranger looked at you as equally shocked. “i mean- i mean there’s nothing wrong with indulging in comfortable clothes!” you explained quickly, pressing the samples into his hands. “see you wouldn’t like scratchy clothes, right? or fabric that quickly makes you sweat or feel too warm! i always talk to my customers about what kinds of fabrics they would prefer… i believe life is too short to wear ill-fitting clothes or ones that don’t feel comfortable! good clothing should make you feel like… like a warm hug.”

the stranger didn’t look like he understood what you meant, making you scoff again. some people really didn’t care about what they wore and how they looked like and it just bothered you. good quality fabrics and well tailored clothing could make you feel confident and safe, even in the worst situations. how could you possibly relax if your clothing was maybe scratchy or ill-fitting? “i’ll prove it to you!” you exclaimed and left the room to gather your supplies, then coming back to instruct him where and how to stand so you could take his measurements. now that he was towering over you, you were suddenly very aware of how tall and broad he was. you felt like a dwarf next to him. up close, you noticed more details about him. he was attractive, you couldn’t deny that - the long wispy eyelashes, the watchful ruby eyes and his soft-looking pink hair. if he picked up on your staring, he didn’t comment on it.

once you were done taking notes and choosing fabrics, you gave him a slip of paper, noting down time and date for him to come back to pick the kimono up. “as for payment-” you started but the stranger dropped a huge bag of coins on the counter. you gasped, pushing the bag back into his arms. “sir, that’s too much! i’ll calculate the exact price for you but-” 

“take it,” he insisted and pushed it back towards you. “i have enough. you need the money right? see it as a generous tip.” your face flushed, you didn’t even know what to say and instead only profusely thanked him. it was so much money, the tip was enough to cover your family’s expenses for a year.

when sukuna picked up his kimono weeks later, he still didn’t understand what a hassle you made about the choice of fabrics and why you were so diligent in taking the measurements. he was fine with everything as long as he had something to wear in the first place. he didn’t care, he wasn’t a measly human that whined about the mildest inconvenience. in the private of his abode, he tried the kimono on, abruptly halting his movements as soon as the fabric touched his skin. so the girl was right, the fabric did feel incredibly good on his skin. it was very smooth and silky, a little cool on his skin. very lightweight but not flimsy. the kimono wasn’t too short and fit his tall statue well, you really did a good job he supposed. he glanced at himself in the mirror. it did look good on him, even the matching colours and patterns were chosen well. you really were a good seamstress, no wonder everyone was flocking to the store.

now that sukuna wore the kimono, he suddenly didn’t want to take it off. it was comfortable and soft, reminding him of you.

003.

your favourite spot was one below a tree, on top of a hill where you could see everything. the small city below, the horizon, the stars in the sky. you often came here when you felt like your life came crashing down your shoulders. it didn’t feel like your own anymore, not with your future already laid out for you without you being able to control it. complaining had always felt redundant and ungrateful to you - you had everything you needed, a loving family, food on the table and your family was wealthy enough to not have to worry about money. but in return, they expected everything from you, their eldest daughter. sometimes, the pressure was too much for you but they expected you to do as they say. everything was well until they announced that you were to get married and they’d found a suitor for you. you couldn’t even protest, the decision had already been made behind your back and you couldn’t refuse. you sniffled quietly, wrapping the blanket tighter around you. you didn’t know this man; he might be a complete asshole and not treat you well at all.

the wind was biting at your skin, cold and unrelenting, and yet you felt safe here, away from all your worries. the starry sky made you feel like your worries were miniscule, reminding you that there was so much more out there for you to discover. you’d always liked the sight of stars, they always made you happy. on lucky days, you’d even get to see a few shooting stars. you’d close your eyes and clasp your hands, hopeful that whatever wish you made would come true. the crunch of leaves and twigs made you look up in alarm, scared that your parents had found out you left the estate and now found your secret hiding spot. you couldn’t quite make out the figure in the darkness, only being able to tell that a tall person was approaching you.

you were wary, inching towards the tree behind you to hide but froze when a voice rang out: “i know you’re there. i was looking for you all over the city, little one.” a man clad in a kimono was coming closer, stopping right in front of you and looking at you in disdain. your eyes lit up as you recognized him; you’d met sukuna a couple of times in the city before, mostly when you went to pick up some books to read. he’d been there one time when you were choosing your books and scoffed at your choice. you’d ask him about it, wondering why he thought that your choice was a bad one. he went on and on about how historically inaccurate the book was and that the information about curses was wrong and how an author like that should be ashamed to even publish it. you appreciated the dialogue, you liked having someone to discuss with you. your parents didn’t like that you read fantasy books and books that talked about supernatural events and beings, dubbing them as nonsense and that you should focus on your studies instead.

after your third meeting, sukuna had finally opened up and told you his name. your meetings became more frequent then but you’d never met anywhere other than the bookstore. you were surprised that he even found you here; you decided not to question him though, sukuna always seemed to know where you were, always sensing where you were headed. truthfully, you looked forward to spending time with him. he was attentive and always listened to you, barely ever talking. oddly enough, it made you feel like finally, someone was paying attention to your thoughts and needs. lately, a heavy feeling in your chest was always accompanying you when you met up with him. it was a dull ache, some kind of yearning that you couldn’t quite put a finger on. it didn’t help that you felt like you’d met him before, but you really couldn’t recall where you had met him before. “what are you doing here?” you questioned him, scooting to the side to offer him some space on the picnic blanket.

unceremoniously, he sat down and glanced over to you. he didn’t reply, simply shrugging. “why didn’t you bring a coat?” you asked another question instead, frowning at his choice of clothing. aside from his kimono, he wasn’t wearing anything else. “you’ll catch a cold!” you scolded him, swatting his arm before tugging on his sleeve and signalling him to move closer to you so you could wrap the blanket around his shoulders. you struggled a little to reach him, almost stumbling - sukuna’s arm immediately shot out to hold you so you wouldn’t fall. your cheeks flushed red and you were thankful that it was dark. you cleared your throat and sat back down, snuggling into the blanket and his side. 

“by the way, i read that book you disliked the other day,” you told him, rambling about the contents of the book and what you thought of it, all while sukuna simply listened to you. he only spoke up when he challenged your way of thinking or to agree, otherwise staying silent and just watching you.

suddenly you grasped his hand in excitement, pointing at the sky. “oh, oh! look!!” sukuna’s gaze followed the direction you pointed to, spotting some shooting stars flitting across the sky. “you have to wish for something!” you squeezed his hand and nudged him, then squeezing your eyes shut to prepare yourself to wish. 

“what would i even wish for?” sukuna frowned and pinched your cheek. “what do you wish for?”

“you’re not supposed to share wishes! if you do, they won’t come true,” you argued back and stuck your tongue out at him. sometimes, he really was too skeptical, never indulging in harmless fun. it might be childish to believe in these things but sometimes that little spark of hope was all you need to wait for better things. you sighed when the shooting stars disappeared and let go of his hand, screaming internally. did you really grab his hand like that? you sure hoped you didn’t unsettle him. 

“i don’t think i told you, but my parents have found a suitor for me,” you confided in him quietly, staring at the grass near your feet. “i’m supposed to marry him next year but… i don’t want to, i don’t know this person and i just want to live my life with no one controlling it.”

“i see. there’s still time to get to know him, isn’t there?” you knew sukuna was trying to console you but it wasn’t exactly working. your words frustrated you a little; subconsciously, you’d hoped that he shared the same opinion and maybe, just maybe, help you do something reckless. 

“i don’t want to get to know him,” you huffed and crossed your arms (sukuna thought you looked like a petulant child). “i… i already like someone.”

“you do?” sukuna looked at you surprised and that was the first time that he’d shown any other emotion than indifference. you nodded shyly, hoping that maybe he’d get the hint. you weren’t confident just yet to confess to him but maybe he’d get it from your description alone? 

“i recently met him and i really like that he makes me feel like, you know, important and always pays attention to me. he doesn’t talk a lot but i think that that’s okay, we still have a silent mutual understanding, i guess. and i also think he looks really handsome! although i-”

sukuna had enough of your rambling, he felt annoyed that you were telling him about your stupid crush. whatever boy you had a crush on, they would never amount to the likes of him. why would you look at someone else when he was right there? right here, with you. sukuna reached over and grabbed your cheeks to make you look at him before pressing his lips on yours. you froze for a short moment before returning the kiss, holding onto his kimono when he wrapped his arm around your waist and pulled you closer. why would you pay attention to someone else when he could be with you? for the first time in his existence as a curse, he briefly felt human again. maybe shooting stars were the key to wishes coming true after all; in this moment he wouldn’t mind being human again, being alone with her with only the stars as your witnesses.

004.

gradually you were really starting to dislike your night shifts. usually, you’d ask to cover them because it was quiet, there were no nosy customers and the only people that ever came in so late were sleep deprived students that pulled all nighters to write papers or study. well it used to be that way until a group of, presumably, freshmen started coming more and more frequently - they wouldn’t have been so annoying if it wasn’t for them talking and laughing obnoxiously loud. they would stay until late in the night and kept ordering drinks. the audacity to have oddly specific orders, to watch you like a hawk while you were preparing their drinks, it made your blood boil. to top it all off, one of the guys kept flirting with you, even when you’d already made it obvious that you were not interested at all. no matter how uninterested and abrasive you acted, the guy would not leave you alone and his friends would try to act as wingmen. clueless and horrible wingmen.

you were glad that you were never alone during your night shifts, depending on the weekday you’d work in a team of two or threes. whenever they could, they’d cover for you and you were thankful but also felt bad, which usually resulted in you taking over anyways. you placed the basket on the counter, grabbing a towel to dry the cups you’d just washed. the chime of the doorbell made you look up, your heartbeat speeding up at the sight of sukuna coming in. like the group of freshmen, sukuna had recently started to visit the café more and more. he usually only came late at night and he probably was your favourite regular. scratch that, he was your favourite, no one was as calm as him and he never caused trouble. yeah, maybe those night shifts weren’t all that bad, you thought to yourself. you looked forward to him visiting every time you had a night shift.

“hi sukuna,” you greeted him softly and gave him a smile, placing the cup on a shelf. “the usual?” he took a seat near the bar, placing his wallet on the counter and taking off his coat. sukuna was peculiar, not particularly in a bad way. you always thought that he was a little mysterious. he always wore the same kimono - who wears kimonos everyday in this day and age anyways - the same white kimono but maybe he just owned mulitple of them. you could never tell what he was thinking and he had never shown any emotions other than brief moments of bliss when he was having his usual order. his order had always and would probably always be a simple black coffee and some daifuku mochi. it was a weird combo, you mused, but somehow fit him. it was a sharp contrast, just like his tattoos and the soft pink hair. you finished up the order, pushing the cup of coffee and the plated mochi towards him - you’d sneaked another one in just for him, knowing how much he seemed to like them. sukuna looked up at you, ready to protest but you just brushed it off, telling him that it was okay.

out of the corner of your eye you saw your not so secret admirer approaching with an empty cup and you instantly knew you were bound to be annoyed again. you sighed, returning to the cash register to take his order. “so, when am i finally going to get to take you out?” the guy asked, leaning on the counter to get closer to you. you gritted your teeth, ignoring his question and instead took the empty cup, placing it in the kitchen sink behind you. 

“oh come on, don’t ignore me, baby,” he whined, not letting up until you answered. you were annoyed, so so annoyed. your co-workers were currently organizing the inventory so you were all by yourself - usually that would be fine but you’d had enough. this week has already been awful and you just wanted to be left alone. you glanced around, spotting sukuna on the side. suddenly a lightbulb went on in your head and you faced your admirer confidently. 

“i’m sorry but please stop flirting with me and trying to ask me out,” you started and pointed to sukuna who was innocently taking a bite from his mochi. “i already have a boyfriend and i don’t think he appreciates you cornering me like this. you being this persistent is really annoying, girls don’t like that.”

upon hearing his name, sukuna looked up and as if on cue, he glared at your admirer. “yeah, i suggest you fuck off. get a hint, you creep, she’s mine,” he snarled, making a move towards the other guy who was already scrambling to get away and profusely apologizing. mine, mine, mine. his words kept repeating in your head, your heart squeezing painfully. was he interested in you? would he ever come to see you more than just a barista? you sighed in both relief and affliction, trudging over to sukuna. 

“i’m sorry i dragged you into this,” you apologized embarrassed, shoulders drooping and you stared at the floor just so he wouldn’t see your reddened cheeks. “he’s been pestering me so much and i kind of thought that that was the only way to get him to back off.”

“i don’t mind,” sukuna replied curtly, resuming his seat. he didn’t say anything else and you slightly panicked, you wanted to keep talking to him, stay in his company for a little longer. 

“ah uhm sukuna, i want to thank you! if… if you don’t mind, i would like to treat you to another drink?” you suggested, your face now beet red. this was the most straightforward you had ever been with a guy, usually too shy to make a move. in distance you could hear the chime of the doorbell and the doors slamming, indicating that the group had left. you were alone. sukuna didn’t reply at first and you were sure you’d fucked up and got ready to backtrack and laugh it off when he nodded. 

“go ahead, little one,” he nodded towards the counter. “you choose the drink.”

you didn’t know why sukuna kept calling you little one but for some reason, you didn’t mind. it did however make your heart ache in what you could only describe as melancholy. you weren’t sure why. while you started brewing some green tea for the two of you, the sound of thunder rumbled in the distance. the pitter patter of raindrops against the glass front was the only sound audible in the entire café. sukuna hadn’t uttered another word, not even making a sound of acknowledgement when you handed him the cup of tea and sat next to him. 

“you didn’t bring an umbrella,” you noted, looking out of the window. it was raining heavily, with no signs of it stopping anytime soon. “i guess you’ll have to stay here for a little longer, otherwise you’ll get sick. i hope you aren’t sick of me though.”

sukuna took a sip of his tea. “i don’t mind your company,” he replied, looking at you. you couldn’t tell what he was thinking but you sincerely hoped he wasn’t joking. hearing that gave you a little hope. 

“i like moments like this,” you confessed to him, clutching the warm cup with your sweater paws. “having a warm cup of tea and watching the rain from the comfort of your home. or in this case, a café. the sound of rain is really calming, isn’t it? makes you forget about all your worries for a while, it’s just you and your cup of tea.”

again, sukuna didn’t reply for a while. you thought you’d bored him to death with your monologue until he spoke up: “i don’t see how it’s any different from having a cup at any time of the day.” your cup was placed back on the counter. you frowned, not sure how to explain it to him. in moments like these, sukuna seemed to be something of an old being that has seen everything, feelings now dull and locked away. 

“well, see it like this. making yourself a cup of tea or coffee everyday is a normal thing to do, right? it happens almost automatically because it’s just part of your daily routine, you like how it tastes, it makes you feel more awake or helps you sleep. but… but you never really take your time to enjoy it, right?”

sukuna was contemplating, you almost giggled at the little frown on his face. but you were glad that he was willing to listen to you and discuss it with you, instead of dismissing the topic entirely. “but what does that have to do with rain?” he finally asked. 

you pointed outside. “you wouldn’t really go out in this weather, right? not if you have any emergencies or urgent matters to attend to. and same goes for everyone else; it kind of… kind of forces you to stay inside, to fully enjoy your warm beverage. the sound of rain is pretty calming, it’s some kind of whitenoise that might block out intrusive thoughts, at least it does that for me. so it’s only you, the sound of rain and your cup of tea. for a few minutes, you can just relax and have a moment for yourself.”

sukuna still didn’t quite understand how humans worked. it’s been hundreds of years since he’s ceased to be human, he’s forgotten what is what like being human. what human emotions entailed. but he agreed, it has been a while since he’s felt at ease and peaceful even. it was a moment of bliss, a moment that caused a flare-up of old, buried feelings inside of him.

004.1

you still hadn’t mustered up the courage to actually ask sukuna out after you dragged him into that fake dating-situation. he did still come late at night, being the most loyal customer of the café at this point. it was almost… almost as if he’d seeked out your company. though he did tell you that he didn’t mind your company; your ego deflated a little. sukuna still wore his kimono but paired it with a thick winter coat - it was winter after all and the weather had been very extreme. the ground was covered in inches of snow and you hadn’t seen the sun in weeks. sukuna insisted on walking you home when your shift ended. you weren’t sure why because he’d never offered to do so before. you were thankful though since it was still snowing and the streets were completely empty; even though the snow looked beautiful, it was still a little eerie to walk home in this weather. especially since a lot of busses weren’t running anymore due blocked roads.

“sukuna, aren’t you cold?” you asked as you switched off the lights and fumbled with your keys. finally finding the right one, you closed up, shoving the keys back in your back and fishing out your gloves. “you don’t even wear gloves!” you gasped when you saw his bare hands, handing him one of yours. sukuna looked at you as if you were crazy.

he wasn’t cold but he couldn’t tell you that, couldn’t let you know that he was a curse. but handing him one of you gloves? you were too nice, always thinking of others first and never being selfish. sighing, he put on the glove that was uncomfortably small but he’d endure it for your sake.

“it’s been a while since we’ve had this much snow,” you mused and took a few steps around, giggling at the sound of crunching snow beneath your feet. sukuna simply followed you, looking comical with the bright yellow and tiny glove on his hand. you smiled at him, admiring how etheral he looked underneath the streetlights with the snowflakes flurrying around him and some getting stuck in his hair. your heart suddenly ached, a far away memory emerging. it was blurry and unclear, a cold night similar as this underneath the stars and a face staring at you. you couldn’t tell who it was nor were you sure whether it was just a case of déjà vu.

“you know, this kind of calls for a snowball fight,” you grinned at sukuna mischievously and grabbed some snow, beginning to form it into a ball. he raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms, looking at you defiantly. 

“i’m not going to indulge in childish business like th-” he didn’t get to finish his sentence as you hurled the snowball at him and giggled like a maniac as it hit his shoulder. you quickly hid behind a bush as you quickly tried to form another, enjoying the dumbfounded look on sukuna’s face. clearly, he didn’t expect you to follow through with your plan and was caught by surprise. “oh you’re on,” he growled after a moment and grabbed himself some snow as well. you quickly threw another snowball at him, this time only being able to hit his leg. eyes widening at the sight of sukuna raising his arm to throw his snowball at you, you let out a squeak and dove behind a tree - the snowball still hit you square on your back, making you yelp at the cold feeling.

for minutes you could only hear the crunches of snow, loud laughter and snowballs hitting objects. you sat on a bench, exhausted from running and ducking away and your belly was starting to hurt from all the laughter. sukuna caught up to you, juggling a snowball in his hands. “you gonna give up?” he asked, a smirk gracing his lips. clearly he was winning, being able to aim a lot better than you. you missed him most of the time but had fun regardless. 

“never!” you replied, holding out your arms to defend yourself from the incoming snowball. it never came and instead sukuna was inching closer with an evil look in his eyes. oh no. what was he up to? you yelped when you realized that he was aiming for your neck, jumping up to get away from him. sukuna was quick to react and grabbed your arm, pulling you back into his chest and holding you close, smushing the snow against your neck. “ew sukuna, stop!” you laughed and squirmed in his arms until he threw the snowball away, rubbing your back gently. 

“that was really cold, you know,” you pouted, burying your face in his chest. 

he wrapped his arms around you, sighing quietly. “i know, i know, sorry.”

you swore that you felt his lips on the crown of your head.

005.

you were, undoubtedly, lost. your phone was about to die and you were stranded in the middle of the city, not sure where to go. to be fair, it was very, very easy to get lost here and it was your first time visiting. your grandparents lived here and while you’ve visited before, you couldn’t quite remember anything anymore. you were a child back then. and the city had drastically changed too, making it difficult for you to navigate yourself around. though your poor sense of direction was probably at fault as well. you sighed, trying to call your grandparents again. no one was picking up. you turned your phone off to save some of the battery, maybe you could call them later.

luckily, you’d brought your cameras so you could at least keep yourself busy until someone freed you from this misery. you walked towards the nearby shrine; there didn’t seem to be any people here, it was very quiet aside from the sound of cicadas. you took a few photos before continuing your journey, soon finding yourself standing on top of the hill. the view from here was breathtaking, even more so because the sun was starting to set, painting the sky in a beautiful yellow and orange hue. you fumbled with your camera again, trying to take a photo when someone suddenly moved into your shot. you paused and looked at the person in front of you who was staring at you as well. considering they were wearing a kimono, you assumed that they must work here. did you make a mistake? maybe you weren’t supposed to take photos and this person came to tell you off.

“i’m sorry!” you said quickly, quickly shoving your camera in your bag. “am i allowed to take photos here?” 

the stranger frowned at you, clearing his voice before replying: “how am i supposed to know? i don’t work here.” 

you groaned, rubbing your face in embarrassment. of course you’d say something wrong, you always did. and now you probably annoyed him too - he looked really annoyed. but since he wasn’t working here and there was no one else around, you guessed you could take photos after all. there was no one to tell you off anyways. however, the stranger was still standing there, looking at you in what seemed like interest. you felt awkward just continuing your endeavors without acknowledging him, so you asked: “do you live here? i’m just visiting, so i’m not very familiar with the city.”

“you could say that,” the stranger simply replied. when he didn’t say anything else, you decided that it probably was okay if you just continued taking photos without acknowledging him. though it did make you queasy, knowing that he was just watching you. didn’t he have anything else to do? a few minutes passed. he sighed and walked over, pointing at your camera. “what are you doing?” you were surprised at how straightforward he was, not expecting to engage in a conversation with you. maybe people in this city were just extra talkative and you’d have to get used to it. your grandparents never told you about this though. 

“ah i’m visiting my grandparents here and i thought i’d document my stay here. so i can look at these photos whenever i want and just have the memories on photo,” you explained and rummaged in your bag to show him the polaroids you took earlier. “i particularly like polaroids because you can’t edit or change them… whatever moment you capture, it’s true to what you saw. there’s no need to make photos beautiful when they hold a special place in your heart and are tied to a specific memory.”

the stranger nodded, pointing to your polaroid camera. “and you take them with this device?” his choice of words startled you a little, he didn’t seem to be familiar with this type of camera which you found odd. everyone knew what these were nowadays, almost everyone owned them. but you didn’t want to judge him or make him feel stupid though, patiently explaining to him how the cameras worked and where he could purchase them. he seemed to be really interested, closely inspecting the camera, turning it around and fumbling with the buttons. only after you finished rambling, you realize how much time had passed - it was almost dark now and your grandparents were probably worried sick. your phone was turned off the entire time and you forgot to call them. 

“excuse me, i really need to call my grandparents!” you looked at him apologetically, leaving him with your photos and camera. normally, you would be very wary; normally, you wouldn’t even show anyone your photos, rather keeping them to yourself because they were your precious memories. but something about him resonated with you, he seemed familiar and yet he didn’t.

you found a spot a few meters away from him calling your grandparents and profusely apologizing to them for not calling sooner. you promised them to wait at a popular and well known spot nearby so they could come to pick you up since it was already getting late, then hung up. to your relief, the stranger was still standing there, watching you intently. “thank you,” you smiled as he handed you your belongings. “my grandparents are picking me up soon, thank you for keeping me company. won’t you be going home soon?” 

suddenly his face expression turned rather… sad? somewhat melancholic and you feared you’d said something wrong until he shook his head. “i have to go somewhere later. let me walk you for a bit, it is dark after all.” you looked at him a little dumbfounded, not expecting him to suggest something like that.

“oh you don’t have to! i’ll totally be fine, i-” “i want to. let’s go,” he interrupted you, already beginning to move. you hastily followed him, clutching your bag in your hands. the entire walk was rather silent, none of you saying a word. it wasn’t a tense and uncomfortable silence though - you very much enjoyed his presence. it made you feel safe too, even though you’d told him earlier that you didn’t mind walking by yourself, it was comforting to know that he was by your side. you were in an unfamiliar city after all. hell you even got lost, so who were you kidding. you wondered who the stranger was, what his story was, what his personality was like. this was a one time meeting though, so you didn’t really have any hope of meeting him again. that was very unlikely.

“okay this is the spot. my grandparents are going to pick me up here, so it’s okay if you go,” you pointed at a café and gave him a reassuring smile. he didn’t look impressed. “o-oh wait, i need to thank you somehow.” you held a finger up to signal him to wait for a bit and fished out a polaroid you’d taken earlier. it was a simple shot, only the temple, bits of the trees and the sunset in the background. but you thought it was appropriate, the two of you had shared this moment after all. 

“here, this is for you. it’s not a lot but i guess… it’s a really nice photo and maybe the start of your collection, if you decide to get a polaroid camera?” he took the photo from you, inspecting it before nodding and thanking you. he looked like he was about to say something else but was interrupted by some bright car lights and the sound of honks.

“ah, i have to go! it was nice meeting you,” you bid farewell to him and waved, running towards the car. sukuna watched your figure retreat, arms dropping to his sides.

006.

it was so cold, so incredibly cold. you really hated disliked these long winters, the sky was constantly dull and grey, the days were short and you hadn’t seen the sun in weeks. it made you feel sluggish and unmotivated, you were just hoping that spring was coming earlier this year. you yearned for sunshine and warmth, to be able to go outside without freezing and just spend more time outside. regardless, you held onto your daily walks because they gave you some peace of mind in your hectic life. you were approaching the last year of your studies and the amount of exams, assignments and your looming thesis were just suffocating you. but soon, soon you were done and could finally take a breather, until then, the only moments of relaxation you’d have were your walks.

despite the cold, there were a lot of people near the park; children who were engaging in snowball fights, elderly who were walking their dogs and some joggers too. your eyes were wandering around, watching all the busy people around. too absorbed in your task, you didn’t notice the man in front of you until you bumped into him. you quickly removed your earbuds and apologized to him, about to continue walking when he suddenly grabbed your arm, holding you back. you were confused, did you maybe accidently hurt him when you bumped into him? you looked him up and down to make sure that he was okay; there really wasn’t anything wrong. he let go of your arm. “is something wrong?” you asked concerned and turned to him. 

“y/n?” 

you froze at the mention of your name. how did he know you?

“who are you? i’ve never met you before.”

in all your past lifetimes, you’d taught him how to be human again, how there was value and joy in even the littlest of things. with each iteration of your existence, sukuna thinks that he’s learned to love you more than the last. when he sees how at ease you are spending time with him, a curse that is feared by everyone, he contemplates confessing to you. but something holds him back, it’s the fear; the fear that you won’t return his feelings. he’s seen you be with someone else, see you fall in love countless of times. he yearns for it to be him, hoping that you do choose him, love him. for thousands of years, he’s spent his time finding you - your reincarnations don’t recognize him and it pains him to get to know you anew each time but nothing pains him as much as his existence. he wants to hold you, be yours, grow old with you.

for the first time in thousands of years, sukuna wishes to be human again.

ps.: i am so sorry if i hurt your heart there omg

#jujutsu kaisen #sukuna #ryoumen sukuna #sukuna x reader #ryoumen sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #ryoumen sukuna x you #sukuna imagines #ryoumen sukuna imagines #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jujutsu kaisen fluff #fic: cynosure #writing

[batlingsstuff]

|| DREAM SMP HEADCANONS ||

✧─── ･ ｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

hello! this is my first time doing headcanons, and i just want to clarify some things:

sadly, i won't be doing requests because i'm busy af with school and i dont want to dissapoint anyone, but you can drop some suggestions and i would think about it! it would be really nice :)

also i won't be writing romantic headcanons for minors or those who are uncomfortable with it, but i can do platonic headcanons for them! ^^

i won't be doing nsfw headcanons either, because i'm uncomfy with sexualizing real people and just writing nsfw in general :)

also, please tell me if someone is uncomfortable with fanfics and/or headcanons and i will erase that part as fast as possible, thanks for passing by! - batling

✦ means platonic

✦ characters : ranboo, tubbo, tommy, philza, techno and jschlatt

♥ means romantic

♥ characters: quackity, wilbur, nihachu, dream, george, sapnap, eret, karl, fundy and bbh

keywords:

(y/n) : your name

(n/n) : nickname

(p/p) : pizza place

✧─── ･ ｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

“As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.” – John Green

┌────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┐

SLEEPOVERS

---

GENDER NEUTRAL

└────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┘

♥ Quackity

oh boy

i just have two words for this one: pure chaos

he will punch you with a pillow if you try to sleep

and you will be MAD at this

grabbing a pillow and hitting him RIGHT IN THE FACE with all your strenght

he'll probably fake cry about it, saying that you hurt him

after a while of pillow fighting, you guys got tired and plopped into the bed, snuggling into eachother and just enyoing the comfortable silence before drifting to sleep

♥ Wilbur

you two will probably blast hamilton and scream the lyrics till the neighbours wake up and you get angry knocks at your door

and you will laugh at that, lowering the speaker's volume and telling him to lower his voice aswell to avoid your neighbours calling the police

then you'll eat snacks and talk about anything that pops into your mind, laughing at the most silly jokes

he will sing sweet songs to you, making you fall asleep to his calming voice

summary: fluff

♥ Nihachu

you and her will bake pastries at a very late hour

she REALLY enjoys baking with you bc she thinks it's a great way to spend time with you

all this girl wants is to spend her time by your side, doing particularlly anything like streaming, baking, playing games and going outside for a walk and/or shopping

once you finished baking, she will kiss your cheek multiple times. that's her way to tell you that you did a great job :)

you'll spend the rest of the night cuddling, eating your pastries and watching some random movie, commenting about how bad it is and laughing

♥ Dream

bruh

this bitch will speedrun the sleepover

is it possible to speedrun a sleepover? maybe

you'll spend the rest of the night probably playing uncharted 3: drake's deception in his old ps3

after a while, you guys got bored from uncharted and went to his pc to play amnesia: the dark descent

there are 2 options:

you will be scared as fuck and will avoid looking at the screen when you think something bad will happen or when some body will come out from a drawer

or you will be totally chill with it, laughing hard when clay pisses his pants for real when he encounters the gatherer

you named the gatherer 'bob' :)

♥ George

he'll take you to the rooftop

and pushes you so you fall to your death

i mean

he gets blankets and pillows so you can stargaze together

he'll teach you the constelations while pointing them, excited about every single one of them

"look (y/n), that's the ursa major!"

he'll have hot chocolate prepared too, so you don't get cold while stargazing

you try your best to not fall asleep on the rooftop

but eventually fail

when he notices you're asleep, he stops talking about the constellations and carries you to your bedroom, giving you a goodnight kiss and leaving you in your bed so you can have a peaceful rest

♥ Sapnap

hey mamas

i don't know what sapnap will do in a sleepover so i will just improvise B)

you will watch anime together

not any kind of anime, like that romance-comedy bullcrap

no fuck that

you will watch the classy angsty anime like madoka magica

WATCH IT IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY

you will fucking cry because of literally anything that happens to the characters

"(y/n) why are you crying it's just a show"

'IT'S NOT ANY SHOW SAPNAP IT'S FUCKING MADOKA MAGICA OF COURSE I'M GOING TO CRY'

the last chapter made you fucking cry harder

AUTHOR HERE I WAS CRYING SO MUCH WHEN IT ENDED

yeah you will basically watch anime with him, cry about it and he will comfort you and bring you a glass of water so you don't have a terrible headache after it

I KNOW THIS HEADCANON SUCKED I'M SO SORRY

♥ Eret

KINGG <3

you two will plan a picnic in your yard

yes your yard

he'll bring a ton of snacks and you'll buy a few drinks

you two spend the rest of the picnic talking about your future and enjoying the snacks

then, he'll make you stand up and will teach you how to dance tango

and of course you will mess everything up

and you even stomped on his feet accidentally, making him wimper

but he brushed off the pain and laughed at your concerned face

after calming down his laughter, he gave you a passionate kiss and hugged you tightly

i love eret ok

♥ Karl Jacobs

this man.

this man is the definition of sweet

you'll spend the night cuddling and making cute pet names for eachother

he will definetely give you a great back massage if you're stressed

then he'll start writing love letters full of things he adore of you

and you'll do the same for him

after that, you will share your letters and just snuggle and smile at the sweet things you guys wrote for eachother

he will deffo shower you with kisses when he finishes reading your letter, telling you that you're the nicest person on earth

and that he loves you so so much

♥ Fundy

i'm a huge fundy simp ok

he will bring his piano to your house and you guys will compose a melody together

he will let you sit on his lap while you play the piano/keyboard with him

fundy will basically teach you how to play basic piano songs

you asked him if you guys could play megalovania together

he said no :(

but still you got to play nice songs together without messing up

and when you got the hang of it, he snuggled his face in your neck and kissed you there genly

and when you got tired, he started playing very calming songs and you fell asleep in his lap, snuggling into his chest

he gently carried to your room and will sleep beside you putting a fair distance so you can have a comfortable sleep!

♥ BadBoyHalo

bbh supremacy

he will get rat ready so you can snuggle with her too :)

you guys will mainly play with rat and talk about life in general

he will call you tons of cute pet names

ofc he will call you muffin it's bbh who we're talking about

he will talk about how bad he wants to spend the rest of his life with you

after a while, he will take you to his kitchen and start making muffins together

he will guide you on how to bake 'em though

you guys had a great time making muffins and cuddling with him and rat :)

══════ ∘◦❀◦∘ ══════

✦ Ranboo

tall mf gives the best piggy back rides

when he gets to your house there is a 100% chance he will bump his head on the door frame

and there is a 100% chance you will make fun of him because of that

"(y/n) please stop laughing my head hurts :("

you'll give him some ice to put on his head while you two play minecraft on your ps4

you will bring snacks too and ask him if his head is better

"yeah, thank you (n/n)"

he will pull you in a hug so you can be comfy together while you play good ol' minecraft

because ranboo surely doesn't play anything besides fucking minecraft

stfu that video of him playing spooky's jump scare mansion doesn't exist

✦ Tubbo

SWEET BE BOYY <3

he will gift you a bee plushie

expect a lot of (FRIENDLY) hugs from him

like fundy, you guys will play piano together

you guys are most likely to prank call some random numbers AND your friends

and you accidentally called some random pizza place

"hello! this is (p/p), may i take your order?"

you were nervous and didn't know what to say

UNTIL YOU CAME UP WITH A GREAT IDEA

"hello? are you there?"

'hi yes, i would like to order 7 extra large pepperoni pizzas to (tommy's adress).'

"oh- okay! uhm- they will arrive in a few hours. are you okay with that?"

'yes ma'am, thank you.'

when you ended the call, you couldn't help but burst out laughing, knowing that tommy will be so mad at you guys-

✦ Tommy

like quackity, PURE. CHAOS.

you guys will obviously stream your sleepover

doing a q&a stream :)

tubbo and wilbur will probably crash your stream and start spamming things like 'MEETUP??' and 'DIDN'T GET AN INVITE'

you guys laughed and added them to the call

"WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU GUYS INVITE ME?" wilbur shouted

'i'm sorry willlll'

you kept playing minecraft with wilbur, tubbo and quackity too since he crashed your stream like an hour later

after the stream, you got up and plopped on the mattress that was on the floor

"tired?"

'yeah'

"okay, good night big (initial)"

✦ Philza

POG

YEAHHH SLEEPOVER WITH THE MINECRAFT GOD

AND KRISTIN'S THERE TOO :)))

and oh god you ADORE kristin

i'm pretty sure she's a total sweetheart

it would be like having a sleepover with your parents

only that it's less boring

you guys will watch a movie together, you will be in one side of the couch eating snacks while phil and kristin are in the other cuddling

you'll eventually bug them about it

after the movie, you fell asleep early and philza noticed, talking to kristin about it too

and wrapped a blanket around you so that you get a good rest :)

✦ Technoblade

mr. blood god teaches you the arts of the CRAFT.

yeah i mean it's techno what else does he play besides minecraft

he will play bedwars w/ u, teaching you how to pvp

"bro you kinda suck tbh"

'stfu techno'

he will comment about how bad you are, but tries to help you get better anyways

and when you do a very poggers gamer move, he praises you

and when he praises you you're all :)))

after awhile, he gets tired from watching you play minecraft and suggest watching anime

fucking weeb

i mean

uh

other thing you guys do together in a sleepover is playing and commenting about pokemon

if you don't like pokemon get tf out of here /J

i was joking please don't leave i respect your tastes

✦ Jschlatt

ooooh boy

get ready for a session of wii training

that's all you guys will do

play wii sports and some other shit like wii music

he will laugh his ass of if you fall while playing wii fit

but he will eventually help you bc outside his funny and shouty persona, he's a really chill guy and a really nice person!

seriously like have you ever seen a theweeklyslap video?

well expect hearing amazing pep talks from him

bc this man is a legend and knows his way to words and is very good at comforting people :)

sometimes you'll rant to him about anything that's happening in your life, and he will listen to you and give you really helpful advice

and you appreciate him so much for that

✧─── ･ ｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

TYSM FOR READING GUYS, i appreciate it if you made it this far :)

i hope you guys really enjoyed these headcanons, it's my first time doing them and aa i'm a bit nervous about posting this but i'll be fine ig

also i'm sorry if there's a grammatical error, english is not my native language and i'm still learning it :) have a nice day/night, drink water and don't fuck up your sleeping schedule!!

#mcyt x reader #ranboo x reader #wilbur soot x reader #dream x reader #nihachu x reader #sapnap x reader #quackity x reader #georgenotfound x reader #karl jacobs x reader #tubbo mcyt #tommyinnit #philza x reader #technoblade x reader #schlatt x reader #fundy x reader #badboyhalo x reader #fluff #eret x reader #fanfiction #mcyt imagine #dream smp #dream smp x reader #comfort headcanons #sleepover headcanon

[divinefireangel]

Hey there!!! Can you please write a smut on SF9 finding out their partner reading smuts 🥺🌝 (I want to see how dirty they can go🌝) And if you don't want to write for all of them then maybe you can just do it for any member you're comfortable to write on. Literally, ANY MEMBER WOULD WORK. I really want to read something like this haha🤭

Also, I genuinely love your writings! I'm new to Tumblr but I'm literally binge reading your posts. Gosh you're talented as fuck😫💗✨

Lots of love, and thank youuuu💕

OMG YES YES YES YES

TMI: Not gonna lie, I was thinking about this when my mom came into my room to talk to me, and my recent story was literally right there just open and I was panicking. Although she doesn't know anything 💀. She's cute like that, my mom.

You are so sweet anon 🥺🥺. Go on make me cry with your lovely words 😭. I will try my best to write more and sorry this took so long 💞💖 LOVE YOU 💓

S/O reads Smuts 🤭

Disclaimer: This is just a work of fiction. If this piece of fan fiction is offensive to any celebrity, fandom or culture please let me know so I can take it down. Also note that this is my version of a character or celeb, which will vary from person to person.

Copyright: Please note that this is my work and if you want to publish this on any other platform, take my permission before doing so. Taking an author's work and posting it somewhere else without any intimation is just disrespectful. I readily welcome suggestions and criticisms. That being said, Happy reading! 🤍

Warnings: 18+ ages and all readers (nothing specified with respect to gender, appearance, etc of reader). Rough sex (YB). Thigh riding (IS). Dick riding (JY). Marking. Biting. Humping. Dining table sex (DW). Low key strength kink? Idk (RW). Biting using teeth (ZH). Exhibitionism. Terrace sex (TY). Slight voyeurism. Oral - reader receiving (HY). Somehow I end up writing the filthiest things for Hwi. Cockwarming to sex (CH). It's really difficult to think of 9 different things for 9 different people😤. Also some may be unprotected sex, don't do it unless you want kids. Lmk if I need to add more!

Word Count: HAH jokes 😂

All members under the cut!

Youngbin

Doesn't understand at first 💀

But he isn't scared to ask so he'll just ask you

The panic on your face makes him panic

Apologizes 🥺

Then you explain that it's no big deal and that it's just a story

But he saw his name 💀💀💀

So he's curious and so he does research aka Googles it

Has a mixed reaction, doesn't know what to think

On one hand, he's flattered...?

Like, oh sweet, you are reading a story about him probably railing you to death

On the other hand, why are you reading it?

Did he not satisfy you enough? Should he do more? He wants to

So he will pick a random one, read it and be like, Okay. This is how it's gonna play tonight

So determined 🥺

Picks you up for your date and stuff

Timeskip to the bedroom by a steamed dumpling Dawon

So touchy and observant

Tries his best to remember what was in the story

Forgets but that's okay tho cause now he knows what you want

More Dom than usual

More vocal than usual

His grip on your skin leaves so many bruises and literal fingerprint shaped marks

Bites your neck a lot

Doesn't hold back one bit

Secretly satisfies his wishes too

Teases you for being so ready

Teases you for every reaction

Pulls your hair

Overstimulates you

Until you're tired and can't take it anymore

He could go for a round more

So he does

It's also like, he's lowkey angry at himself cause you were reading smut which made him think, maybe you thought he was too vanilla

But after you've both cooled down you ask him what happened and why he was so rough, not that you had a problem

Expresses his concerns and you tell him that you read those only cause you wanted to know what the fandom thinks of him and the way they think he likes to have sex

Blushy babyyyy

So cute 🥺

Inseong

Bro

Do I even need to 😂

He's probably written a few 💀

He seems like he's into roleplay 👀

So when he does find a tab open on your phone about literal PORN, in words

He doesn't think much of it tbh

But is curious

He'll tease you like you are both high schoolers

Holds you phone up high so you can't reach it

Satisfied when you whine and pout

Tucks your phone in his back pocket and grabs your face

" I think it's hot "

Peck's your lips and slaps your butt leaving you wide eyed

You need a minute to process what just happened lol

Running after him you pull him down on the couch, sitting on hids lap

Bite you lip and grab his face pls

Now he's wide eyed 😂

Kiss his neck and talk to him sexily

" Do you really like that I read smut? "

You look so innocent he would cum right there

Poor man is dumbfolded

So much that he doesn't even realize you were grinding down on his thigh the whole while

Grabbing your hips he nudges your hips to continue their movement

Loves having you so close

Especially after discovering your secret

Suck him off after and he'll do any and everything for you 😉

Jaeyoon

Oo this one is fun

He won't confront you immediately

He'll just think about it a lot

" How are they so cute when they read such things for fun? "

Stares at you from across the room

Smirks at your cute smiles

Timeskip this time by Baek Huru

Surprises you by kissing your neck

Humps your butt

Pecks you neck

Rolls your nipples in his fingers

Moans in your ear, deeply and hoarsely

Pulls away dragging you to the bed

Sits near the headboard

Beckons you to come closer and naked 👀

Forces your dick in you, slowly tho, don't worry

Doesn't give you a lot of time to react

But, all this seems familiar

Then you realize that he's trying to recreate the imagine you were reading before

The whole idea made you hot

Istg you've never finished so soon

He tells you that you don't need to read those stories when you have the real deal right there

Sanghyuk

Smug bastard

He's happy that you're thinking and reading about him even when he isn't with you

He will actually read the warnings and is mildly surprised lol

Wow you really into all that?

He has no shame so he will ask you directly

You stop doing what you're doing and just slowly turn towards him

He's scared lmao

Then explains himself and says sorry

Tbh, you're more shocked that he isn't angry

Blinking you slowly make him sit on the dining table chair

Pacing you start to think of and explanation now

Is there any explanation for reading smut? Idk 😂

Honestly, he asked you so that you could actually do what the warnings said in real life

Gets up, takes your hand pulling you close and lifts you, making you sit on the dining table

Removes his shirt before kissing you intensely

Tells you that he wants to fuck you on the table like in the smut

Nodding you let him take over

Makes you cum twice easily

It's more romantic than rough

Passionate, very passionate

Kisses you a lot

Hands on you all over you

Pulls you closer and closer by your thighs

Lays you down and fucks you till your back is no where on the table

Sweet reassuring smooches when you're done

Tells you to talk to him about such ideas rather than just reading them

Seokwoo

He is shocked™

Listen okay

He's tall

He's scared that he'll hurt you if he does what he wants without thinking

Reads multiple smuts 💀

Only the ones you've liked so far tho

Fuckin uses your account so yeah obviously

Now he'll be ready to talk to you about it

So shy omg

Stutters words out cause he's so flustered

You need to read his mind, literally

Once, somehow you are finally clear about what he was talking about

You'd just laugh at his cuteness

Boy is confused ??

Pushing him down on the bed you climb on top of him

Yes climb

Needy but still shy and shocked

Wastes no time in getting naked

Allows you to do whatever you want to him

No, really

Let's you take charge that is only until you tease him

Flips you and thrusts into you so hard the bed is shaking and you feel like it might break

Strong grips on your thighs and hips and belly and arms

Definitely sore for a few many days 💀

Juho

I'm not sure tbh

Either he won't care at all like

" Oh yeah this is just their thing "

Or he'd be so into it like hed wonder why you were reading it, was it for ideas?

He already has those so you don't need them from someone else

He won't ask you about it tho

But you will bring up an idea that was in one of them

And he's down

Or up, whichever you want

Asks you what you want more times than usual

But it doesn't make sense cause you're literally going crazy with the way his cock feels inside you and he asks you what you want?

Starts moving before you answer

Asks you again and again till all you can say out loud is " More "

He's fine with that answer

Hands above your head

Teeth scraping your the front of your throat drawing so many sounds from you

He's driving his dick in you so fast that you're moving away from him

Praises you with his deep ass voice

Gives you his Vampire stare™

That's all you need to cum undone

Keeps it a secret, won't ask you unless you bring up your little extracurricular activity 😌

Yoo Taeyang

SHY BABYYYYY

So pink when he realizes what you're reading lol

But he's so mesmerised that he goes on reading it 😂

You catch him looking at your phone, no big deal

But he's looking at it as though he saw a ghost

He's turned on but at the same time he's appalled

Do people see him like that? Do you want him to be that?

He's gonna need a lot of time to process the information

When you reassure him that he doesn't need to change anything at all, he's more calm then

But on a fine ass blue moon, his fine ass is gonna decide that he's gonna try something new

So there you are, on the terrace talking to someone on the phone. After ending the call he'll come and hug you from behind

It's all aww so cute till you feel his dick press into your butt

Forces your head back to rest on hius shoulder slowly but hotly

Unbuttons your jeans and pulls them down in one swift motion and his hands are all over you

Somehow the idea of having sex in the open night sky is so exciting

Stops just before you reach your high so that he can fuck you

You're leaning on the terrace wall

Face pressed slightly on it as your butt sticks out for him

Giving him permission to do anything to you

The orgasm hits you so fast but it's so fulfilling 🤤

And your pants are being pulled up even faster 💀

Maybe you should leave smut laying around

Youngkyun

You've found the saucuest lil smut about your boyfriend

He's sitting at the table, on his laptop composing and writing songs while you are here on the bed, blanket over your legs

Now see, you aren't really one to get off of smut but this particular one was so realistic

The description

The reaction

The dialogues

Reading it made you body move on instinct

Lower lip getting stck in your teeth

Hand travelling down to your privates

Your hips thrusting forward into your hand and fingers

Your breathy moans, that you tried your best to stick to, were louyd enough for him to hear

At first he thought you were doing a breathing practice or something

That is until he recognized the pattern

Lifting his blank phone up, he moved it to look at you through it

Boy is so shocked

It's like his own private porn show

Placing it back on the table gently, he moves the blanket slowly, getting under it

Licking his lips, he tucks his tongue out, licking the area that your fingers just slid over

Gasping at the sudden feeling you drop your phone and move your blanket off

You inevitably moan at the sinful sight below you

Your lovely boyfriend, looking up at you through his lashes, tongue coated with his saliva and your leaking juices

Holding your wrist, he nudges you to continue what you were doing, with his tongue never leaving you

Gripping your thighs, he bites your inner thigh as you work yourself closer to your high

After you cum, he'll lick off all your juices

Then he'll be all sweet asking you what you were reading

Round 2? 😉

Chanhee

He'll find it funny 💀

Why do people write these things

Why do people read these things

What is the use?

He is partly curious lol

When you tell him it stimulates the necessary regions, boy is shook

Then he's like nah

So you make him read one

He can't even make it halfway through lol

The foreplay itself made him hard enough to want you and to want to be in you

Grabs the phone and sits next to you

" I'm hard "

You look at him like boy what

Then he tell you that he now understood why people read them and that he's happy that people read them too help themselves

And you're like okay and what's the point

Pulls you on his lap

Whines at the feeling of to your butt on his arousal

Makes you stand now lol

Pulls his pants to his thighs and even yours

Places himself in you so that now when you sit on his lap again, not only is your back to his chest

Also his dick is in you

Somehow finishes the rest of the fic and just thrusts up into you

Cause you feel so heavently around him

Goes on and on and on till you're bouncing on his lap

Cums in you and just stays there till you finish your work

Still has mixed feeling now tho

Cause if reads them he wants you to be there near him and he wants to read more cause these fics are very addicting

#sf9 #sf9 smut #sf9 reactions #sf9 scenarios #sf9 imagines #sf9 x reader #sf9 x reader smut #youngbin #inseong #jaeyoon #dawon #rowoon #zuho #yoo taeyang #hwiyoung #chani #youngbin smut #inseong smut #jaeyoon smut #dawon smut #rowoon smut #zuho smut #yoo taeyang smut #hwiyoung smut #chani smut

[booasaur]

Just saw your gif set about Audrey and Till. When season 2 started and Audrey changed to a completely new character I thought the writers just didn't know what to do with her, same with Wilfords sudden obsession with her when until then he was all like "Melanie, Melanie, Snowpiercer" but now I actually think the Audrey thing makes sense. She had the opportunity to develop and grow without her abuser and then was trust upon him again and started regressing into the person she knew he would love, and she has been chasing that from that moment on. But then they got back to the train all those things happened and I think she saw Wilford like that and the hero worship, obsession and "love" that she thought she felt disappeared, I think Audrey can only be interested in a cunning and dangerous Wilford because that was how he groomed her, now tho he has nothing and once again they are being kept apart so I think she is having a easier time going back to who she was

I'm just still really confused, because she doesn't seem--well, I mean, I suppose that's maybe realistic, too, that someone who doesn't seem or even isn't outwardly horrible could still love and be with a terrible person...? But then the way she acted when he was all shaken after waking up again, that was pretty brutal. And the thing is, unlike in real life where people can be pretty isolated from the effects of their family's horrible actions, she could see it all very up close.

But tbh, I think you have the reason for the switch in your post, but it's not necessarily, or only, about Audrey's character so much as that they needed someone to fill in that role once Melanie was out. Or maybe even more than that, the show needed for Wilford to have someone on his side, someone interesting that we cared about, not just poor Kevin, as everyone else slowly moved over to Layton's side. Audrey certainly offered that, and indeed, could offer a more interesting angle about surviving through all this, especially when she realizes even Wilford is now allying with Alex and presumably Layton.

I'm actually not opposed to this ship at all, two first season characters who are legit interesting and have actual roles in the show that aren't guest star love interest, I mean, that's actually pretty great on paper. And they've taken the time to actually give them interactions and screentime together this season soooo. As long as this isn't something because the writers ran out of what to do with one or both and the next step is to kill off one or both for angst, I could be pretty into them.

ETA on April 3, 2022: 

Actually, I’ve really rethought what I wrote here, based on rewatching s2, which, my bad, I must have just blanked out a ton of. When I’d watched live, I’d still been very annoyed at Jinju’s disappearance, a double whammy of homophobia and racism in wiping out a significant queer Asian character without any mention from Bess and Melanie, and skimmed a lot and what I did watch, I didn’t fully take in or absorb, I guess?

Because I seem to have skipped or plain forgotten major chunks of the story that were quite relevant to Audrey’s characterization. The more I rewatched, the more started to come back but none of that had been in mind when I was watching the end of s2 or s3.

She was groomed, as you said, anon, and I think a lot of what came after was to try to justify that, to make it worth it. She was actually scared of going back to him at first and warned the rest about him. They sent her back, to be their spy, and she even seemed to try to resist falling back into his thrall, like, he’d made her cut her freaking wrists. And we know how hard it is to resist him, look at poor Alex too, who’s only a little younger than Audrey was he got her hooks into her, since at 18 she was already with him.

And when Wilford was weaker in s3 after waking up from the suspension drug, for a bit, what really got to me during Audrey’s rant was her saying “science is nothing without power, you told me that”. She’s really just trying to justify her past actions AND what happened to her, that it was all necessary. Because if it wasn’t, then not only are all her horrible choices and decisions pointless but so was everything that happened to her.

So yeah, while she has done a lot of bad things and encouraged and ignored more, and turned in s2, as you said, into a seemingly almost completely different person, indulging in alcohol and orgies and turning a blind eye to Wilford’s cruelty, with the previous context, I’m much more willing to forgive her as a victim of abuse who fell back into destructive patterns when her abuser returned.

#the way I've been trying to answer this for days lol #replies #femslash related stuff #sent on 20220309 #Anonymous #snowpiercer #brakenight #I know this is airing like right now but I've been on a project call for the last three hours #and it hasn't finished yet it's just quiet right now #miss audrey