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thefandomchaos · 6 months

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Got bored, wrote a argumentative essay on why I believe Sam has body dysmorphia for fun so here it is:

For a character who defeated god, you may not think he could suffer from something as common as body dysmorphia. Sam Winchester from the tv series “Supernatural” (2005-2020) is a complex character, but is this throwaway line from pilot episode that brings this theory to life. “Sammy is a chubby twelve year old. It’s Sam, okay.” (s01ep01). A Iconic line, but knowing how this character grew up, it makes it hard to believe Sam would ever get to the point of being considered ��Chubby’ unless he considered himself as such. In this essay, I will show why I believe Sam Winchester suffers from body dysmorphia with facts from the show.

Firstly, we have the fact that growing up, Sam (and Dean) had very little money. Growing up, his entire childhood and part of his adulthood was living in motels. With a absent father who would leave Sam and his brother for days or weeks with little money for food, they had to do with what they could. We know that Dean as a young age stole food and did things for money to buy said food. We also know that Dean went hungry time from time or ate very little so that Sam could eat decently. (We see in a episode a man asking Dean if his every gone hungry, like haven’t eaten in days hungry and Dean answer that he has.) We see in the Supernatural episode “Bad Boys” (s09ep07) in a flashback that Dean got arrested and sent to a boys home for getting caught stealing bread. The person in charge of the boys home, Sonny, asked him if the bread was for him but Dean never answers, knowing Dean character’s its safe to assume the bread was for Sam. Due to the fact that they barley had enough money and often went hungry, I don’t think Sam would have ever gotten the chance to get ‘Chubby’ unless he believed he was.

Secondly, we have the fact that their father, John Winchester, trained Sam and Dean from a young age. In a world of supernatural beings and a man driven by revenge, John constantly trained Sam and Dean throughout their childhood, and not just any training, military training with the bonus of fighting monsters. The moment Sam found out about the supernatural, his training began, which is depressing when you realize he was only eight, as is not like John would care considering Dean already knew how to shoot a gun around that age and he gave Sam a gun when he was nine. (“Yeah? When I told Dad I was scared of the thing in my closet, he gave me a .45.” …. “I was nine years old! He was supposed to say, don't be afraid of the dark.” (s01ep01) ) So with constant training, fighting for your life and going on hunts, is safe to say that Sam and Dean were constantly in shape. Which again, further cements my theory.

Lastly, and the most obvious fact, we see Sam at twelve years old. In that same episode “Bad Boys” (s09ep07) that I mentioned earlier, we see a young Sam Winchester briefly in the last flashback of that episode. We know that in the flashback’s of the episodes, Dean is sixteen years old, and considering the fact that his four years older than Sam, it would mean Sam is in fact, twelve years old. And in the scene, his in fact, a very small and skinny kid, and the oversized shirt his wearing doesn’t do any favors. So going back to Sam’s line in the pilot, things aren’t adding up, unless we considered, that this is just Sam suffering from body dysmorphia.

Now of course, you can argue that I’m over thinking this, that is a line from the first episode and they din’t even know if the show would do good and it was only going to last five seasons before it continued with a different writer. And yes, is okay to assume that, maybe Sam is just saying things to get Dean to stop calling him ‘Sammy’. But again, Why say that? They never had enough food to eat, they were constantly trained and doing things that would keep them in shape, and this is not even mentioned that throughout the entirety of the show, Sam is constantly eating healthy and keeping in shape by exercising and going on runs in the morning. And more obvious, Dean wouldn’t have believed him since he pretty much raised Sam and would know well enough Sam wasn’t chubby. And with the certainty that Sam had said the line, as if stating a fact, it’s same to assume that Sam personally believed that as so.

In conclusion, I believe Sam Winchester suffered from body dysmorphia. We see constant evidence in the show that there was never a way from Sam to end up ‘chubby’ as he claimed he was at twelve years old. And again, considering we actually see him at said age, it’s easy to assume that Sam just believed he actually was. Then again, this is all my own personal believe and theories, and every is entitled to their own opinion. In the end, this is just a show and nothing is real.

#supernatural #spn #supernatural pilot #supernatural 1x1 #supernatural 9x7 #dean winchester #sam winchester #sam winchester has body dysmorphia #body dysmorphia #john winchester #john winchester is a shitty father

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haley-harrison · 23 hours

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My man Eric was really gonna have him do an "I've been expecting you, Mr Bond" 😂😂😂

#spn pilot og script #the first draft #supernatural pilot #spn first draft screenplay #supernatural #spn pilot #supernatural origins #supernatural original script #eric kripke #DEAN HARRISON MY BELOVED #Dean Harrison #hbo supernatural #hbonatural

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dykeydean · 3 months

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my body's made of crushed little stars + sam winchester

#mitskinatural #im having so much fun #sam winchester #my body's made of crushed little stars #supernatural pilot #supernatural #spn #ezra posts #my edits

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girl-bateman · 8 months

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Supernatural 1:1 Pilot

#spn #supernatural #spn season 1 #aesthetic #cinemetography #sam winchester #dean winchester #supernatural pilot

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pinoruno · 8 months

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YOU CAN NEVER GO HOME - in honor of the pilot's 18 year anniversary (😵‍💫)

#eighteen years................#anyway i wrote this slapdash this morning in the margins of the Real work i was supposed to be doing. dont love it might redo it later #supernatural #1x01 #1x01 pilot #supernatural pilot #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #destiel #deancas #spn poetry #john winchester #<- part of the reason i do not love this is that it is more John than i intended so. yeah like i said might go back and wrench him out of i

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trials-era-sam · 1 year

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For Stevana Week, Day 3: Sam and feeling like a freak

I am OBSESSED with the Galahad speech in s8 okay

@theincesters

#stevanaweek #sam winchester #supernatural pilot #4x21 when the levee breaks #4x22 lucifer rising #1x05 bloody mary #2x21 all hell breaks loose part 1 #i make gifs sometimes

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witchy-writing · 2 years

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1.1 Pilot

Dean x Sam x gn! Winchester reader

Summary: Ever want to be included in the show, as a Winchester? Wait no more. Follow y/a, Sam and Dean through 15 seasons of saving people, hunting things the family business.

A/n - I am going to attempt to do all 15 seasons, please be patient with me. This took two days to write. Eeeek, I hope it’s ok!

warnings: Follows the first episode of the first season. Death. Fire.

word count - 3119

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“Night Sammy, Night y/n” a young Dean states from his mother’s arm. Mary gently lowers her older son, allowing him to kiss his younger sibling’s goodnight. Mary smiles, her eyes lighting up with the love she holds for her three children, looking over her shoulder she spots her husband, John, and smiles. John flips of the light, whispering to his youngest children “If you two sleep through the night, you can have Dean’s room”, Mary chuckles overhearing her husband before tucking Dean into bed and placing a kiss on his temple, “Good night love” she softly whispers, a smile on her face.

A few hours later, Mary awakes with a start. The twins screaming coming through the baby monitor kept next to her on the bedside table next to her and John’s wedding photo. Mary sits up, sleep still embracing her, touching the mattress next to her she can’t find her husband, smiling when she realises her husband is looking after the youngest children. She pads her way down the corridor rubbing sleep out her eyes, pushing the twin’s door open. She smiles as she spots John’s figure over Sam’s crib. “John?” She questions “Are they hungry?”. There’s no response, apart from a quick and sudden shhh. Mary rolls her eyes at her husbands antics, taking a step back and turning around heading back to her warm bed. Reaching the bedroom, she soon realises that there is a light, a slight glimmer coming from downstairs. She’s cautious. Bare feet shuffling down the stairs, before turning the corner, a movie is playing out on the Tv lighting up the sitting room; and sat in front of the tv asleep, slumped over in his chair is John.

Fear! It’s all she can feel as Mary blurts out “Oh my god” before bolting up the stairs back up to the twin’s room. She bursts the door open, the door bouncing on its hinges swinging roughly, urgently flicking the switch, the brightness blinding her slightly before her eyes adjust. Whatever is in the room scares her, the colour drains out of Mary’s face. She starts panicking, hyperventilating.

“…Get away from them…” She all but whispers, before letting out a blood curdling scream which wakes up the rest of the house. John shoots up with a start, running to Sam and y/n’s room. “Mary?” he questions, his wife no longer in sight. The babies are crying, bawling struggling to calm down, but they’re ok, and he lets out a sigh of relief. Gently stroking y/n cheek, he checks them over before checking over Sam. They settle a little, and John smiles, turning to search for Mary. But something catches him. Somethings not right. John turns back into the room, a drop of blood now staining the bottom sheet of the crib the two siblings share.

Drip.

Another drop of blood, quickly followed by another. John realises that the droplets are falling from above, he angles his neck upwards, shear terror shivering its way down his spine. Mary. She’s splayed out, her eyes wide and staring, almost glass like.

“No… oh my god no…” He croaked. He stands frozen, as a sizzling noise overwhelms his senses, the smell of smoke as small black lines spiderweb across the ceiling. The lines connect, spelling out three words. Coming for you. Before suddenly igniting, engulfing the walls and Mary.

The fire alarms blare, beeping fast, high pitch. Y/n and Sam start to fuss again, the noise hurting their ears.

“Mummy? Daddy” a scared voice questions from the hallway, John snaps out of it, grabbing Sam and y/n, swinging the door open, he looks at Dean.

“No Dean, don’t look, okay? We gotta go.” He assured his young son, leading Dean down the stairs and out the front door, holding onto his youngest offspring. It’s not long until the fire fighters arrive. The family are sat on the hood of a car, Dean tucked up into his father’s side, he holds y/n tentatively, John holds Sam in one arm, slowly rocking his young son, while wrapping his arm around Dean. The house burns into the night, reds, yellows, and oranges fill the night sky. Dean turns and hides his face in his fathers’ side, John’s eyes harden, his jaw clenched. No more apple pie life.

---

23 years later.

Sam had moved to Stanford, you’d gone to visit him once or twice, though the distance between Kansas and California made it more difficult. Though you made sure to at least text your twin brother once a week. He had a girlfriend now, you had only met her once, but she was sweet.

About a week ago, Dean turned up at your front door. “Dad’s missing” he yelled as he strolled right through the front door. “Thanks for knocking” you reply, eyes rolling back at your older brothers’ antics. “Dad’s missing” he repeats.

“So what? Dad disappears all the time. We have our own cases to be working on Dean.” You say, walking into the kitchen, setting about moving a couple of dirty dishes into the sink. “y/n!” Dean shouts, “Would I be here if I wasn’t worried?” He had a point, Dean and you were close, closer since Sammy had left for the apple pie life. The two of you staying as hunters, helping John out on a few cases here and there, but mainly soloing it. “Let’s go find dad” you respond, staring into the green eyes of your older brother. ‘Where are you dad?’

Baby’s engine purrs, before Dean turns the key, the headlights switching off. Its peaceful, yet eery. You and Dean climb out the car and gather a few things before walking towards the apartment building. “It’s that one” you whisper, pointing out the window of the apartment your twin lives in, Dean looks at you, “Are you sure?” He murmurs. “Positive” you nod your head back at him.

“Well here goes nothing” Dean says, wrapping a small piece of cloth around his knuckles, before punching the window. It doesn’t take much for the window to shatter. “Thought it would take more effort that that” Dean mentions, turning to look over his shoulder at you, before slowly climbing through to avoid the smashed glass, you slink in, following closely behind. The apartment is dark, but it doesn’t take long for Dean to find the kitchen. “Want a beer while we wait?” He questions, his face illuminated by the small fridge light. Before you get the opportunity to answer, the door swings open, Sam armed ready to attack, you and Dean dodging just in time.

“Easy tiger. Just looking for a beer” Dean jokes with his younger brother.

“Dean?” Sam questions, eyes widening. The both of them ignoring your presence.

“Heya Sammy” Dean smirks, “How are things? Enjoying law school?”

“You scared the crap out of me!” Sam barked, before suddenly spotting your figure. “y/n? You… I though better of you” he sighs dejectedly.

“Sam, we’ve gotta talk” you butt into the conversation, pointing at yourself and then the two boys.

Out of nowhere, a soft tired voice enters the conversation. “Sam?” Jessica asks, eyes adjusting to the two other figures in her kitchen. She’s dressed in a smurf t-shirt, and short shorts. You smile, she’s just as you remember. Dean smiles mischievously, “I love the smurfs”, you stare at your older brother, before sharply elbowing him in the ribs, he hisses taking in a deep breath.

“Jess, hey sorry to wake you” Sam mutters, turning around to look at his girlfriend. “This is… well this is y/n, but you already knew that” you smile and wave at her, the recognition flashes across her face, out of the corner of your eyes you can feel Dean staring at you. Sam continues “Ummm, and this is… well this is Dean”

“Your brother Dean?” Jess questions, a confused look on her face.

“Sammy” you interject “We’ve gotta talk”

“Well, whatever you two need to say, you can say in front of her.” You frown, last thing you had known, Sam had never told Jess anything about your lives, about the creatures that go bump in the dark.

“Dad hasn’t been home in a week” Dean explained, his face hardening with a seriousness.

“So, he’s working overtime on a Miller Time shift. He’ll stumble back sooner or later.” Sam answers quickly, his brain not fully processing the extent of Dean’s sentence.

“No Sam.” You added, “Dad’s on a hunting trip, and he hasn’t been home in a week.” Your twins eyes widen, the mutual understanding between the three siblings that this conversation has to be silent.

“Jess. Excuse us. I need to talk to these two outside” Sam mutters to his girlfriend, before turning around and walking to the door with Dean, Jess stands there, confused. You look at her and smile slightly, mouthing a quick ‘sorry’ before running of to catch up with the rest of your family.

You walk in silence, towards baby, Dean lifting the boot. “He left his journal?” Sam’s eyebrows scrunch up in concern, “Tell me everything.”

It takes awhile to explain what has happened, but soon Sam is caught up. The two of them getting into an argument not long after. “Shut up!” You shout, “Now is not the time.” The boys whip their heads round, staring at you. “They have a point” Dean says, nodding in your direction.

“Look. Dad will be okay. He’ll be home in a few days. You’ll see.” Sam sighs accepting that the argument has been lost.

“He’s in real trouble if he’s not dead already. I can feel it, and I know you can too.” Dean responses, Sam deflates, you can see the worry in your twins’ eyes. You know deep down he cares.

“So, the only question is: you coming with us or not?” You prod, Sam’s eyes fill with flickering emotions, before he finally gives in. “Fine, as long as I’m back by Monday. I have an interview for law school.”

After packing, and saying goodbye to Jess, the three of you head to baby, Sam throwing his duffle in the boot, before climbing into the passenger seat. “Oi! I sit there” You protested, “y/n” Sam growls “It’s 3am, you come into my apartment, convince me to leave my girlfriend for a few days. I don’t see your name on it; therefore, I’m sitting here!” He argued before climbing in and slamming the door, Dean getting behind the drivers’ seat not long after. “Hey! Get in!” Dean shouts, head hanging out of the window, rolling your eyes at the two boys, you huffily clamber into the back of the car.

You’d been in the car for a couple hours, baby’s engine producing a gentle purring, though it’s drowned out by the sound of Deans music blasting over the speakers. “What was he hunting?” Sam asks. “Not sure” You respond, passing a sign that reads ‘Welcome to Sanger, California, U.S.A. America’s Christmas Tree City.’ For such a happy sign, there was an ungodly number of missing posters stapled to the bottom of it, of course Dad chose a place like this you thought.

You zone back in, Sam explaining that there have been no reports of Dad at any hotels or bars. Leaning forward, in between the two front seats you pipe in “I think if we wanna find Dad, we gotta find out what the hell’s happening around here.”

Eventually, you find dad’s room, its covered in pins and string connecting newspaper articles and missing photos. Dean sniffs a burger, before pulling a disgusted face “Dad’s not been here in a few days” he looks over his shoulder, you and Sam are staring at a particular newspaper article. “Dean” you call out tentatively, reaching out and pulling the newspaper off the wall, the small pin ripping the paper where it had been attached. Dean walks over to get a better look at what you’ve been looking at. “He found the same news article” Sam confirms, “What are we dealing with then?” Dean questions, he’s getting agitated, you can tell from the way he’s moving around the room. “He answered that as well” Sam responds, pointing at a sticky note in the jumble of papers and string. “A woman in white” You whisper in recognition.

“All right, so if we’re dealing with a woman in white, Dead would have found the corpse and destroyed it” Dean questions, looking at you and Sam.

“Well, she could have other weaknesses” you suggest. The boys look at you and nod in agreement.

“Think we need to question the husband” Sam admits “That’s what dad would do.”

“If he’s still alive” Deans butts in. “Anyway, I’m starving! Want anything from down the street?” Sam and you just shake your heads no. “Oh well, your loss” Dean mutters turning around, and walking out the front door.

“We need to find the husbands address” you say to Sam, leaning over his shoulder and peering at his phone in his hand, you see that it’s on the voicemail screen, Jess’ name visible. “She’ll be ok, Sammy” His head turns slowly to look at you, brown eyes wide and innocent. He blinks slowly, snapping out of whatever thoughts were going through his head. “I’ll find the addre..” He starts answering your earlier statement, when suddenly your phone starts ringing, Deans name flashing across the screen.

“Dean?”

“Dude, five-oh, take-off” He responds quickly, words spilling out of his mouth like vomit.

“What about you?” you probe. “Uh, they kinda spotted me. Go find Dad.” The line goes dead, eyes wide you turn to Sam, who has already started opening the bathroom window. “Come on y/n!” He snapped, you hurry over quickly, rolling out into the bushes behind the motel just as the front door is broken in.

Once you had escaped, you and Sam had decided to follow up on the only lead you have, Constance’s husband. The both of you trudge up to the rickety house, a chain link covering the grimy glass window. Sam knocks on the door, an old man opens it, a puzzled look crossing his face.

“Have you seen this man?” You hold up the photo of your father, recognitions flickers through the old man’s tired eyes. “Yeah, he was here three or four days, ago. Said he was a reporter” He’s hesitant, you can tell that he’s already suspicious. Sam decides to take control of the conversation, it doesn’t last long but you get all the information you need. Thanking the man, you turn around, walking back over to where baby was abandoned.

“So, Dad was here” you state, looking at your taller twin brother.

“And he” Sam moves his head back, directing your attention to the old man watching the two of you out the window “committed adultery.” He pauses, sighing before continuing “We’re definitely dealing with a woman in white. Though our main problem now is figuring out how to get Dean back”.

“Leave that to me” you pull out your phone, dialling 911. “H-hi” you fake stutter, pretending to be in distress. “There’s gunfire, I’m on Whiteford road.”

“There that should work” you smile, shutting your phone and stuffing it into your pocket, Sam is staring eyes wide.

“What?!” you glare at him.

“H-how?”

“You learn these things when your brother leaves, and Dad expects you to fill his place”

---

At Constance’s house

“Well, that was a job well done” you smile, walking backwards, your brothers walking behind you.

“Saved your lives” Dean chortled, throwing open Baby’s door, and climbing in.

---

You’d been on the road for about half an hour, Sam was looking up the message Dad had left Dean. Highway to hell playing over the speakers. It was peaceful. It felt nice, you had missed being the trio, you had missed your twin brother, but you knew he would be leaving soon. Dejectedly you let out a sign, breath steaming up the window.

“It’s called Blackwater Ridge, Colorado” Sam jabs his finger at the map, pointing out the area that was in the middle of nowhere.

“Sounds. Charming” You mutter, rolling your eyes. The boys ignore your sarcastic comment, Dean looks over at Sam, “How far?”

“Six hundred miles” Sam replies, you sink down further into the seat, the soft leather moulding around your body.

“Dean” Sam uttered.

“You’re not going?” Dean gruffly responds, turning Baby around, heading back to Stanford.

---

You swap seats, sitting back in the passenger seat, Sam leaning through the window. “Keep me updated, yeah?” He smiles sadly, stepping back away from the car, and Baby’s engine roars to life. You watch him through the wing mirror, he’s stood in the same place, watching as you and Dean disappear. A single tear dribbles down your face. Dean glances over at you, reaching out he places his hand on top of yours. Dean has always said ‘no chick flick moments’, but he’s always had a soft spot for you. He comforted you as a baby, after your first break up, when Dad hurt you, when Sam left. Sam might be your twin, but Deans always had a soft spot for you.

A chill goes down your spine.

“Dean?” you look at him, your eyes wide, silently asking all you needed to ask.

“You felt that too?” He stares at you, the same scared yet puzzled look across his face. Suddenly he throws Baby around, travelling back to Sam’s apartment. “Somethings not right”.

As you pull up to Sam’s building, the windows are glowing, orange and red. Flames starting to lick around the top of the windows. Nightmares from when you were little flashing through your eyes, you can remember when Dad had told you what had happened that night, and now it was happening all over again. Silent tears had started to pour down your face.

“Sam!!!” You wail, opening the car door, darting towards the building as fast as your legs allowed you, Dean already ahead of you, feet ponding kicking up dust and sand from the gravel. “Sam!” you continue bawling. Dean slams his way into the bedroom, yellow and oranges tongues of fire reaching down almost lapping at your skin. Dean grabs Sam, pushing him out of the room, his wails of anguish as Jess burns ripples through your body.

“Jess! NO! Jess!” Sam weeps, as Dean continues pushing him out of the burning building. Your heartaches, maybe its because you’re seeing your brother hurt, maybe it’s a twin thing, but you swear that you feel Sam’s hurt, the pangs of guilt that ricochet through his body affecting you too.

It doesn’t take long for the fire truck to arrive, you hug your brothers close to you, glad that they are ok. Dean separates from the hug, staring at the burnt building, before walking behind Baby, opening the boot. You hear the familiar click of the shotgun being loaded. Sam starts walking over to Dean, you trail behind. Sam’s face is dark, covered in desperate anger. Sam looks over at you then at Dean, you hear him exhale, as he tosses the shotgun in the boot “we’ve got work to do” he hisses before slamming the boot shut.

---

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faultyfoundations · 10 months

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Easy, tiger.

#scenes that live rent free in my mind #spn #supernatural #dean winchester #sam winchester #supernatural pilot

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wherethesunsails · 11 months

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just objectively speaking like. the Winchester's relationship with demons over the years is so funny to me

#leo watches spn #supernatural pilot #spn 1x01

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arsonistsam · 2 years

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original poem: In Which the House Is the Problem x Supernatural “Pilot”

Image id: Cream colored background with the Title Text “In Which the House Is the Problem” underneath it, text reads

“The house is the problem and it wants to eat you.

Maybe because it is hungry, truly ravenous, and the only thing that can fill the hole is you.

Maybe it is concave and starving and you are the first unsuspecting human to cross its gaping, dark threshold.

But maybe the house is empty and it is lonely, because its people moved away or died.

Maybe the house is cold and that coldness has bored a great big hole in the plaster. Maybe the only way to fill that hole is consuming whatever it can get a hold of so it’s bursting full.

Maybe it eats you so you can never leave it and it will never be empty again.

Maybe the house wants you to make it a home, anew.

Maybe it wants to gnash at you with its shutter-teeth and spill your blood on the floor so that it soaks into the wood and no amount of scrubbing will take it away.

Maybe the fire in the furnace that is your soul will warm the house up.

Maybe the only way for the house to be, is to destroy.”

Underneath that image there is an image of the Winchester house from Supernatural’s pilot episode

#haunted houses #supernatural #supernatural pilot #original poetry #my writing #the house is the problem #yo #!!!#i don’t know how to tag this #spn #Lawrence Kansas #spncreatorsdaily #you can never escape #you can never go home

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kissmyassbxtt · 10 months

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about to start my 4th rewatch! very excited🥰

Pilot - 1.01

#supernatural #spn #dean winchester #sam winchester #pilot #supernatural pilot #cw supernatural #kiss my assbutt #jensen ackles #jared padalecki

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spn-rewrites · 2 years

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01x01 (PART 1)

Season One Episode One: Pilot

A/N: hey guys, I re-edited the pilot and am going to work my way down and because they weren’t originally posted on this account, I’m gonna re-post them here - all tags will stay in tack.

Summary: Dean and Y/N go find Sam

Word Count: 3.1k

Part 2 Part 3

It’s been a few years since you and Dean let Sam run off and go to college. He wanted out of this life and there wasn’t really much you could have done to stop him, so you and Dean went off on your own. You took up Sam’s position, doing research and finding jobs. Sometimes you followed leads from John, but it really was just the two of you.

For ten years you had been hunting things with these boys. It wasn’t your first choice of a life, much like it wasn’t Sam’s. But you learned to embrace it because like Dean, you owed your life to John Winchester.

The flames were behind you, englulfing the only home you had ever known, and you were sitting on the side of the road with your knees pulled up to your chest praying to a God you no longer believed in. That’s when an older, scruffy haired man kneeled down in front of you and put his hand on your knee. “I’m John Winchester, a friend of your mom’s. We’re gonna take care of you, okay?”

You weren’t sure how you knew you could trust him but something in his eyes told you that you could. You had seen photos of him and your mom around the house - it was a vague memory but it was there.

The boys behind him didn’t look familiar but John introduced them to you as his

sons and the older one immediately took you under his wing and the younger one made you a bowl of cereal when you got back to the hotel that they were staying at and a few months after your fifteen birthday, you were learning about the lore of demons.

That’s how you found yourself sitting in the passenger seat of the Impala that Dean loved so much, on your way to Standford to go get Sam from college. He made a noble choice, leaving the hunting life. One that maybe you could have made if leaving Dean behind didn’t feel like ripping out one of your own ribs.

However, John was on a hunt and hadn’t come back yet. Being gone a few days at a time without hearing a peep wasn’t unusual, but it had been weeks at this point and Dean was getting worried, so you guys packed up to go collect Sam in hopes he’d help you find him. You had tried to silently protest involving the younger brother, knowing he didn’t want to, but Dean wasn’t one to argue with.

“What is it with you? You don’t want help?” Dean accused, glancing at you from the road.

“That’s not it, I just-”

“You just what, Y/N?” He interrupted you. Your eyebrows raised and you took a breath, ready to fight back. Sometimes Dean just knows exactly where to push your buttons.

“Sam doesn’t want this, Dean. What part of that don’t you understand? He’s happy, he’s got a girlfriend,” you blurted out, your words stopping in your throat as soon as you said it. That was not something that Sam wanted you to tell Dean, but it was too late now and Dean just stared at you. “Her name is Jess,” you sighed out.

“Jess? Seriously? He didn’t think to tell me this?” The Impala started driving faster, picking up speed down the road.

“Can you slow down?” You braced yourself out of habit, used to Dean driving reckless as hell but when he got mad, the reckless seemed more dangerous.

“I’m just pissed, okay?” Dean snapped. You held your hands up in defense and Dean pulled back, taking a deep breath and letting his foot off the peddle. You drove the rest of the way in silence.

You stood outside of the apartment complex that Sam lived in and tried to investigate a way to get inside. “We could use the fire escape,” you suggested. Dean looked down at you with a grin growing on his face, “what?” You deadpanned, still kind of irritated by your last conversation but Dean was smiling now so maybe it was over.

“I like the way you think, kiddo.” Dean patted your back and he started scaling the fire escape, you followed him until you reached a window. The hallways were dark and damp and you wondered how Sam even lived in a place like this before you remembered that this was an upgrade compared to the hotels the boys grew up in.

Dean shushed you as he slowly opened the door to the apartment, and you followed him inside. There was a rustle coming from the other side of the room, a door cracking and then you saw a shadow emerge, most likely Sam.

Sam caught Dean off guard, trying to get him from behind but Dean was not that easy to take down and the two brothers began fighting, Sam blocking Dean’s punches and Dean trying to tackle him to the ground. Eventually, the bigger of the two pinned the smaller. “Whoa, easy, tiger,” Dean grinned.

“Dean?” Sam exclaimed, looking up at his brother and then seeing you. “Y/N? You scared the crap out of me!” Sam was breathing heavier now as you stood next to the two boys, looking down at them with a smile on your face.

“That’s 'cause you’re out of practice,” you said smugly, although you didn’t do any of the fighting and had no reason to be except to push Sam’s buttons. Sam grunted and flipped Dean over, now pinning the older brother.

“Guess not,” Dean sighed. “Get off of me,” he groaned and pushed Sam off of himself and almost into you, but you put your hands out to stop Sam from falling and as soon as he felt your touch he turned around, a smile plastered to his face.

“Hey, pretty girl,” he wrapped his arms around you tight, your heart fluttering at his nickname for you as you hugged him back.

“Sam?” You let go of him as a figure came out of the shadows, Jess you assumed. Sam had told you a lot about her the past year or so, as you guys were in constant contact unlike Sam and Dean, however, you had never met the girl. She was a lot prettier than you imagined, a blonde bombshell.

“Hey, Jess,” Sam said, his face almost seemed disappointed that he had to introduce you and Dean to her finally. Part of you wondered if he wanted to keep his family at an arms length for the rest of his life. “This is my brother Dean and my friend, Y/N,” he introduced.

Dean clearly noticed how pretty Jess was, his eyes falling on her face and then her chest. “I love the smurfs,” he smiled, referring to her pajama shirt but also only noticing because of her boobs. “I gotta tell you, you are completely out of my brother’s league.” Dean flirted, Jessica’s face unamused.

“Well, let me just put something on,” Jess said, turning to walk away, clearly uncomfortable with the entire situation.

“No, no. I wouldn’t dream of it,” Dean protested. You snorted from behind Sam and Dean turned around to glare at you. You smiled back and Dean turned his attention back to his brother. “However, I do have to steal your boyfriend here to talk about some private family business, but nice meeting you.” His last words had a flirty tone to them and you smacked Dean in the arm when he finished.

“What is your problem?” You whispered to him but he just smiled and raised his eyebrows because he knew that you already knew exactly what his problem was.

“No,” Sam said, his tone was suddenly more serious. “Whatever you want to say, you can say it in front of her.” Sam moved to stand next to Jess, wrapping his arm around her waist. That was a bold move for the younger Winchester and you sucked in a deep breath.

“Okay, um, Dad hasn’t been home in a few days,” Dean said with no hesitation.

“So, he’s working overtime on a ‘Miller Time’ shift, he’ll stumble back in sooner or later.”

“John’s on a hunting trip, Sam.” You said, putting emphasis on the word ‘hunting’ causing Sam’s face to drop and dismissing Jessica from the conversation. You waved goodbye to her as she went back into the other room.

Sam thought it’d be better to talk outside, so you followed them down the stairs, your little feet having a hard time catching up with theirs and being a whole flight of stairs behind them, you only caught a small amount of their conversation - Dean begging Sam to help us find John. “Dad’s missing. I need you to help us find him.”

“You remember the Poltergeist in Amherst or the Devil’s Gate in Clifton? He’s always missing and he’s always fine,” Sam said, their voices getting louder as they stopped at a landing and waited for you to catch up. You were out of breath when you reached them, “and you said I was the one out of shape?” Sam joked as you put your hands on your knees to help catch your breath. You fake laughed as Dean kept going.

“Not for this long, now are you going to come with me or not?”

Sam started following Dean and you hesitantly chased after. “I’m not,” Sam’s words made you stop, although you knew that that would be his answer.

“Why?” You asked. Sam turned around to look at you, his features suddenly softened.

“I swore I was done hunting, for good.” Sam sighed and you almost took a step towards him, but you stopped yourself.

“Come on, it wasn’t easy, but it wasn’t that bad.” Dean said, but you knew that that was a weak attempt to make Sam change his mind about coming with us. Dean turned and walked away, but you only followed after Sam did.

“Yeah? When I told Dad I was scared of the monster under my bed, he gave me a .45,” Sam said as we started to exit the building.

“Well what was he supposed to do?” Dean said. You chuckled and looked at him, cocking your head to the side wondering what it was that Dean thought John was supposed to do. Sometimes, you thought Dean was just so delusional that he thought all of this was normal.

“Seriously Dean?” You asked, knowing full well that Dean would do and say anything to defend his father’s name, even to Sam.

“I was nine years old,” Sam said, his voice going quieter and you bit your lower lip. You felt sad for him for a moment, never really understanding how traumatized Sam was with his growing up. For you, it started later. You knew it wasn’t normal and you knew how life was supposed to be for a kid but Sam never got that and his yearning for it was clear. “He was supposed to say, ‘don’t be afraid of the dark’”

“Don’t be afraid of the dark? You should be afraid of the dark!” Dean’s voice got louder, “you know what’s out there. Look at Y/N for Christ sake, she didn’t get a .45 and look what happened to her.” Dean mumbled and pushed open the gate and went outside. You were taken aback by Dean’s words, gasping a little. He had a tendancy of saying things he didn’t mean but he didn’t bring up your past very often.

“What the hell is your problem?” Sam tried to defend you but you grabbed his arm, making him stop. Dean threw open the front door of the building, the traffic from outside coming in for a brief morning until the door closed behind him. “What? That’s not okay!” He snapped back at you, but sighing and letting out a breath when you looked at each other.

You nodded, “I know, but just let it go.” It took a second, but Sam finally agreed. You motioned for the front door and with a deep breath, Sam pushed it open and you followed him outside. With the cold air hitting your faces, Sam continued to fight back with Dean like nothing happened.

“Dad’s obsession with killing the thing that killed mom, the way we grew up, killing everything we can find because we can’t find it,” Sam argued.

“We save a lot of people, Sam.” Sam just scoffed at his brother’s reply.

“You think mom would have wanted this for us? You think Penelope would have wanted this for Y/N?” Sam made Dean stop dead in his tracks and he turned around to face his brother, anger in his eyes. “The weapon training and melting silver into bullets?”

“So you’re just going to live some normal, apple-pie life?” Dean snapped.

“No, not normal. Safe.” Sam spat as you three got to the car, your mind still reeling. You put your hand on the door handle as they argued. You wished you could just disappear, any mention of your mother makes you wanna die. You weren’t sure you ever fully got over her death and accepted the fact that this was your new life now, hunting ghosts and demons and any other creepy crawling that lurked at night.

“Dad is in real trouble right now, if he’s not dead already. I can feel it,” Dean pleaded. His whole demeanor changed, sometimes at an astonishing rate.

You pushed yourself away from the car, forgetting about the pounding in your head and put your hand on Dean’s shoulder. “He’s not dead, Dean.” Dean just looked at you, sadness in his eyes and you felt bad for him. Maybe that was the reason you could never actually stay mad at him, because no matter what he said to you, you knew he never meant it.

“We can’t do this alone,” Dean said. “We don’t want to,” his voice softened when he said this and you looked up at Sam, a small smile playing on your lips.

Dean popped the trunk to the Impala and started looking for John’s files while Sam and you leaned against either side of the trunk, looking in. You remembered the basics of John’s hunt so you started talking, not waiting for Dean anymore. “He started to look at this two-lane blacktop just outside of Jericho, California.”

“About a month ago, this guy,” Dean found the file and handed Sam a picture of the guy who went missing, “they found his car but he’d vanished.”

Sam looked at the photo and speculated, “well, maybe he was kidnapped.”

You rolled your eyes and grabbed the next photo from the file in Dean’s hands, “here’s another one in April, and then December ‘04, ‘03, ‘98, ‘92… 10 of them over the past 20 years.” Dean handed Sam all the articles and photos belonging to the cases you just listed off. You both looked at him smuggly, knowing that you debunked his speculations.

“All men, too. All the same 5-mile stretch of road, it started happening more and more so Dad went to go dig around,” Dean said.

“That was three weeks ago, we haven’t heard from him since,” your voice softened as Sam looked up at you. You held eye contact until Dean spoke.

“And then, we get this voicemail.” Dean pulled out his phone and played the voicemail that John left you last night, the whole reason that you booked it to go get Sam.

“Dean, something is starting to happen..I think it’s serious

I need to try to figure out what’s going on. Be very careful,

Protect Y/N. We are all in danger.”

You watched Sam the whole time as he listened to it, his facial structure not really changing. “You know there’s EVP on that,” Sam said, nodding to the recording.

“Not bad, Sammy. Kind of like riding a bike isn’t it?” Dean smiled between his brother and you but then continued to explain to Sam how you slowed down the tape to find out what that EVP was saying. When Dean played it back, all it said was “I can never go home.”

Sam whispered it back to him while Dean slammed the trunk and then leaned against it. You walked over to stand in front of him, your arms crossed, “we really need your help, Sam.” You begged.

“In almost two years, we never bothered you or asked you for a thing,” Dean tried to guilt trip Sam which you did not agree with but it was hard to stop Dean from doing what he wanted. Sam sighed, finally agreeing to go.

“I’ll help you find him, but I have to get back first thing Monday morning.” Sam warned but you didn’t wait for him to finish speaking. You ran to him, wrapping your arms around his shoulder and he couldn’t help but chuckle and hold you up by your waist. You were excited that Sam was coming back, if only for one hunt. Although you and Dean had become the best of friends over the years, Sammy always held a special place in your heart. He was kind and sweet and quiet, just like you used to be before your mother died. He reminded you of your youth.

“What’s on Monday?” You asked as you pulled yourself away from Sam and he started walking back into the apartments to collect his stuff.

“I have an interview,” Sam said, looking at Dean.

“A job interview? Skip it,” Dean shrugged his shoulders but after Sam said ‘interview’ you remembered exactly what he meant. Sam had told you just a few days ago that he had gotten an interview for the Stanford Law School and that was on Monday.

“No, it’s a law school interview,” you whispered, looking at Dean. Dean’s eyebrows furrowed and he looked at you.

“It’s my whole future on a plate,” Sam explained, Dean giving him the same confused look he gave you. “We got a deal or not?” Sam asked, Dean eventually nodded and Sam left to go get his things while the two of you stayed in the Impala and waited.

“You knew about all of this and didn’t tell me?” Dean asked, his voice sounded a mix of anger and disappointment but you didn’t know what to make of it.

“Sam asked me not to and all this stuff is important to him, Dean.” You explained yourself, throwing your hands towards the apartment building where Sam was building a life.

“We were important to him at one point, too, Y/N.” You sighed, knowing Dean was right but you still defended Sam.

“Drop it, okay? You know now and that’s all that matters.” You knew that wasn’t going to fly especially when Dean scoffed and looked out his window instead of at you.

Tags: @ kaelyn-lobrutto24

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