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justagalwhowrites · 14 hours

Text

...Can Be Found

You and Joel have an unexpected night alone in Jackson. A canon Lavender one-shot set between chapters 47 and 48.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader from Lavender

Length: 3k

Warnings: Smut :). All the fluff in all the world. Eric Clapton. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ only.

A/N: Thank you all so much for loving these characters and hanging out for the Lavenderversary celebration. I hope you love seeing what Joel and Doc were up to today in Jackson ❤️

April 30, 2024

“Please?” Ellie said, her eyes bright and wide and eager. “All the other kids are going and Maria said they’re making some special snacks and shit and they’re putting on some movie I’ve never fucking heard of and I really want to see it, please?”

You glanced at Joel, who looked quickly back at you.

Neither of you had been anticipating this. You hadn’t been in Jackson all that long, Ellie had only been going to school for a few weeks. You hadn’t really spent much time apart, not really. Even Joel, who was regularly leaving Jackson to go on patrol, had never been outside the house overnight. There was a comfort in coming home to each other at the end of the day, the three of you squeezing onto the couch in your living room to watch a movie or clustering on the ground where you could lean against each other while playing a board game. You functioned as a unit now, each of you far more comfortable and secure with the others close.

Ellie wanting to go to the town lock in hadn’t even been on your radar.

But it was a good sign, you thought. She was becoming more and more like her old self every day. She enjoyed school, had made a few friends, was starting to think about what she wanted to do to contribute to Jackson as she got older. It was good to see her here, being happy and having a life. Her wanting to spend time away was good. It just didn’t feel good.

“I promise I won’t even say fuck,” Ellie said, still pleading. “And I’ll leave my knife at home.”

“You should always leave your knife at home,” Joel said, voice stern. “No reason to be carryin’ it around here, anyway…”

“Yeah, OK,” Ellie rolled her eyes and you had to fight the urge to laugh.

You and Joel looked at each other again for a moment. You could tell he was feeling the same unease you were, the same desire to keep Ellie where you could see her at all times because that’s the only way you could be sure that she was safe and whole.

But you couldn’t do that forever.

You sighed and looked back at her.

“Yes, you can go,” you said.

“Yes!” She darted around you to run up the stairs but you stopped her quickly.

“But you have to come back here before going anywhere else tomorrow morning,” you said. “And you have to be on your best behavior, OK gremlin? I know how you can be, no picking fights…”

“I’ll be good, I promise!” She said, frozen with one foot on the stairs.

“Then go get your stuff,” you said, Ellie taking off before you even really had a chance to finish talking, forcing her to yell up the stairs after her. “Make sure you grab your pillow and sleeping bag!”

Joel came and stood beside you at the banister, his hand finding the small of your back, slipping below your shirt to brush his fingers over you there.

“Think we’re gonna be empty nesters for the night,” he said, voice low.

“Think you’re right,” you smiled a little. “Whatever will we do?”

“Oh, I think we can figure somethin’ out.”

Ellie left not long after, running down the front walk to catch some of her friends from school as they headed toward the mess hall turned lock-in site for the night.

“Here,” Joel said, standing next to you on the porch as the two of you watched her laugh with her friends. “Why don’t you get comfortable, I’ll be back in a few.”

You narrowed your eyes at him.

“What are you up to?”

“Just trust me,” he laughed and nudged you to the porch swing. “And be patient.”

You smiled and shook your head a little but settled into the side of the swing that you’d come to think of as yours, pushing lightly off the ground with your toe, breathing in the cool, clean spring air, the scent of rain drifting in from the dark clouds on the horizon.

There was a distant rumble of thunder as the screen door creaked open and Joel came outside, two mugs held tight in one large hand, the neck of his guitar in the other.

“I think we’re getting a spring storm,” you said as he leaned the guitar against the house and handed you a mug before taking a seat next to you. You lifted the mug and breathed deep, your eyebrows shooting up. “Is that…”

“Coffee,” he smiled a little. “With a little lavender syrup that, I’m ashamed to admit, I needed a lot of help to make.”

You looked at him, feeling like you might be about to cry you were so touched.

“You made me lavender syrup?”

He shrugged.

“Figured it’d been long enough since you’d had your favorite coffee,” he said. “Heard through the grapevine that some traders who come through sometimes have coffee. Figured I’d have it ready for when I could get my hands on some.”

“Have I told you lately that I love you?” You asked. “Because I do.”

“You’ve said,” he smiled. “Still like hearin’ it, though.”

You took a sip of the coffee and savored it and thought, for a moment, about the first time you’d met Joel. So long ago now at that coffee shop in Austin, when you were just 20 years old and hoping to find a job you liked that would make you not need to take out more loans to survive the summer. You should have known when you first sat across from him, sipping your lavender latte and talking about his daughter, that your life would never be the same.

Joel put his arm over the back of the swing and you settled into his side, your head on his shoulder, grateful for his warmth as temperature dropped and the rain moved in.

“Think you’ll let me play you somethin’?” He asked.

“I believe it is well established that I am the president and founder of the Rockstar Joel Miller fan club,” you teased. “You can always play me something.”

“Good,” he said, taking his arm back and reaching behind him to pick up the guitar and resting it on his lap. “Because I’ve been working on something for you. Been a long time since I’ve played for anyone so be patient with me.”

“The peanut gallery will be quiet,” you smiled, tucking yourself into the corner of the swing and putting your stocking feet against Joel’s warm thigh as the rain grew heavier. You held your mug tightly in your fingers, the heat and coffee running low.

He started playing, quiet and slow and you recognized it immediately, your breath catching in your throat.

“It's late in the evening,” Joel sang in his soft baritone. “She's wondering what clothes to wear…”

You just listened in silent awe as he played you Wonderful Tonight, the song you’d claimed as yours, for the first time in 20 years. When he finished, he left the guitar in his lap for a moment before glancing over at you, an oddly vulnerable look in his eyes when he did.

“Didn’t say the peanut gallery needed to be that quiet,” he said, his voice thick.

“Joel,” you whispered, setting your coffee on the small side table before damn near throwing yourself at him. He set the guitar down quickly, barely fast enough to catch you as you threw your arms around his neck. He laughed, sinking back into the swing with you in his arms.

“You like it then?” He asked.

You pulled back enough to look at him properly, tears pricking your eyes.

“I loved it,” you said softly. “That was… I can’t believe you learned that!”

“Well,” he shrugged. “Already learned it, once upon a time. More just remembering something I always knew. I was just coming home to it is all.”

You kissed him and he kissed you back before you settled in against his side again, the two of you swaying as the rain fell and the thunder rolled.

“Know what storms remind me of now?” He asked quietly after a while, his fingers trailing up and down your arm.

“Hm?”

“The night I got you back.”

You looked up at him from your place against his chest and found him watching you, his brown eyes soft and deep.

“Me too,” you whispered.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to get back to you,” he said, his fingers still tracing the same familiar path along your skin. “I’ve got a lot of regrets in my life but that’s one of my biggest. I wasted so much time with you. Sometimes all I think about is all that time we missed out on because I was too wrapped up in my own shit…”

“We found each other again,” you reached up and trailed your fingers through his shaggy curls. “That’s all that matters. We can’t change anything that happened to us then, we can only make sure we don’t lose each other again now.”

“Not losing you again, baby,” Joel said, cupping your cheek and kissing you deeply. “Promise I’m not.”

You looked in his eyes, something warm and needy settling low in your stomach as you did.

“Let’s go inside,” he said, his tone matching the already building heat inside you.

You just nodded and let him lead the way.

***

Joel had been waiting for a night like this one.

Maybe not one where Ellie was away quite so long. Her being gone overnight made him uneasy, even if it was just to the town lock-in down the street.

But it did mean he got time alone with you, something he’d been craving more and more lately.

It seemed like all he wanted to do, now that the three of you were safely settled in Jackson, was find a way to make up for lost time.

He wasn’t sure he really could. He’d lost you for too long, done too much he regretted to ever really atone for it all. But he wanted to try. He desperately wanted to do something - anything - that would make himself worthy of you.

Wonderful Tonight had been the first thing he tried to play when he’d gotten the guitar in Jackson. You’d been at the clinic, Ellie at school and he’d fumbled his way through it in the living room, his fingers hurting the entire time. It took time to rebuild the callus, to relearn the song. But it had been so worth it to see the look on your face when he’d played it for you on the porch that night.

The two of you came in as the storm seemed to be reaching its peak, the rain pouring in a steady drumbeat on the roof, the thunder rattling the panes of glass in their frames as he led you to bed.

He undressed you slowly, reverently, taking his time with you the way he’d imagined doing every time he imagined fucking you in those years in the QZ. He cast aside your shirt and his hands skimmed the outline of you, your skin so impossibly soft under his touch. He wondered - not for the first time - how something as soft as you could exist at all, let alone in this world. How something as soft as you could possibly be meant for him, want him. But you did and he lived to give you what you wanted, that’s all that mattered.

You tugged at his shirt and he helped you remove it before he unhooked your bra and cast it aside, too, drinking in the sight of your bared skin before him.

“Christ, baby,” he breathed, pulling you against his naked chest. You pressed your soft, warm skin against him, your arms wrapping around his neck and he guided you to the bed, laying you below him in the middle of it. When he pulled away from you, you whined, your eyes following his every movement. He smiled a little. “Ain’t gonna get far with these still on, I’m comin’ right back.”

He unbuttoned your jeans and hooked his fingers around the waistband of those and your panties, pulling both down your legs at once, leaving you completely bare before him.

“Joel,” you whimpered, your hands finding your breasts by what seemed like their own accord, desperate to hold onto something. You worked them gently as you watched him unbutton his own jeans, biting your lower lip as you did.

“Fuck, you keep right on doin’ that,” he damn near growled as he shucked his own jeans and underwear before crawling up the bed toward you and settling in the cradle of your hips. “So pretty when you’re making yourself feel good…”

He licked his fingertips and slid his hand down your body to the apex of your thighs, finding your swollen bud and pressing against it. Your back arched and you whined again as he started working your clit in slow, firm circles.

“Even prettier when you let me do it, though,” he said, his unoccupied hand going to the crown of your head, toying with your hair before he kissed you deeply.

Your hands left your breasts then, finding his back and pulling him sharply toward yourself, as though you couldn’t get enough of him. You rocked your hips up against him and he smiled against your lips, his cock swollen and painfully hard.

“Joel,” you panted when he pulled back. “I need you, please, I need you, I need you…”

“Need me where?” He asked, breathless himself.

He knew where.

He just wanted to hear you say it.

“Inside,” your eyes were wide, pupils blown. “Inside me, please, I need you inside me.”

His hand left your slick slit and he stroked his cock once with your wetness, the heat of you so close to him.

“Then let me give you what you want,” he said, lining himself up with your entrance and pressing inside you with a deep groan of satisfaction.

He sank into you, feeling your walls parting for his intrusion, how your body shifted and molded to him, your pussy holding him perfectly.

Every time he did this, every time he first entered you, he had the same two thoughts: this was where he belonged, this was so much more than he deserved.

He’d had a hard time reconciling those things. Since he’d met you, he couldn’t shake the idea that he needed to be alongside you - inside you - but he knew that you’d been meant for something more than him. When you were both young, you’d been so full of potential, all brilliant light that it seemed selfish to focus it all on himself. Now, you were the warmest comfort, the most beautiful part of a ruined world. With all he’d done, all the ways he’d failed, he could not deserve you.

He’d let that keep you apart for a long time, the clash of those feelings pulling at him. But now, he knew how they fit, how he fit with you. He had to try to be worthy of you, that was the key. He could not stop, could not wavier. He had to always try. He had to hold you, protect you, bring you the CDs you adored and paint the walls the colors you loved and find ways to make the things that brought you joy because someone like you needed someone who would try for them. In this world there was no sure thing, but he could try. For you, he would try for the rest of his life.

He moved in you slowly at first, savoring the way your skin felt against his, the way your fingers twisted in his hair. But you were both too desperate and needy to take it slow for long, his pace increasing with the steady motion of your hips and the aching clutch of your fingers as you grew tighter and tighter around him.

“You’re so close to coming for me,” he all but growled, voice heavy with need. You whined and nodded against him. “Don’t have anyone here to wake up, want to hear you baby. Don’t hold back for me, let me hear you, want to hear you when I come inside you.”

You whimpered again, louder this time, your fingers scrambling for purchase on his skin, the wet snap of his hips into yours obscene and only bringing him closer to the peak.

He felt you tighten, your whole body clinging to him for a moment - not even breathing - before you called his name and gasped as your core fluttered around him.

Joel stayed buried deep inside you where he belonged, grinding his hips down against you as you came, your pulsing pulling his own orgasm from him as he emptied himself into you with a moan.

After, you tucked yourself against his side, both of your bodies sticky with sweat and your shared spend and neither of you caring.

“Didn’t even need a door this time,” you teased lightly.

Joel laughed once.

“Still appreciate them though,” he teased back.

The two of you were quiet for a moment and he held you close, thinking not of all the years he’d lost with you but all the ones he had ahead. He kissed the crown of your head and you snuggled closer as he smiled against your hair.

“I love you, Joel,” you said softly, your fingers splaying wide over his chest. “I’m so glad we found each other.”

“Me too, baby,” he whispered, holding you closer. “Me too.”

#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #lavender #joel miller x oc #smut fic #lavenderversary

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violetrainbow412-blog · 17 hours

Text

Portrait [K. B.]

Kaz Brekker x fem!reader

word count: 7.7k

masterlist

summary: «when you photograph a person in color, you photograph their clothes, when you photograph a person in black and white, you photograph their soul»

taglist: @rustyyyyspoonz @be-lla-vie @milkshake0 @ladespedidas

Anyone who knew Kaz Brekker well enough could say that he slept with one eye open, metaphorically speaking, so it was no surprise when he was able to notice the extra presence in the room even when he was supposed to have sunk into unconsciousness.

His body still hurt as a result of the altercation he had suffered with an aggressive drunk who was at the Crow Club the night before, but it didn't stop him from sitting up suddenly in search of the knife he kept in the nightstand drawer.

"Calm down," said the stranger's voice, at the same time that the light of a lamp illuminated the panorama. "It's just me."

"What are you doing here?" he was quick to say, looking at you in disbelief.

You didn't have to be in Kerch, but in Ravka, and much less did you have any reason to be in his room.

He noticed that you were wearing one of those second army keftas in scarlet, the one corresponding to your order, and you were looking at him calmly from the other side of the room.

There was a kind smile on your features as you approached him and sat next to him on the mattress, as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

“Saints, what did you do to yourself?” one of your hands reached up to try to touch his face, where it was hurt, and he immediately moved away.

"What are you doing here?"

“Poor thing, does it hurt?” you continued, ignoring his questions.

Kaz wasn't quick enough to escape from your other hand, reaching out to grab his cheek so you could better examine the wounds he had. He felt his breath hitch in his throat as you scooted a little further in his direction, well outside the safe limits for him to be the one you were talking to.

He didn't know what scared him more, the fact that you were touching him or the fact that he didn't dislike it at all.

You said something he didn't understand and then, with your free hand, you began to clean the bruises he felt on his face. It was difficult to describe what he felt every time you used small science to fix him, but it was something similar to feeling a tingling advance through every vein under his skin.

Your movements were attentive and loving, as if you were used to doing them all the time. And you were used to it, but not to doing it with him.

"Why are you here?" he repeated, for the third time.

He could feel your breath close to his face and the hand that was on his cheek had a soft warmth. When you looked at him, he saw that your eyes reflected the dancing flame in the lamp and he asked himself why he had never paid enough attention to them, who at that moment were admiring him tenderly.

“Are you hurt anywhere else?”

Under other circumstances Kaz had already become exasperated by your refusal to respond and would have pushed you away from him in the first place. But he seemed out of himself, as if he weren’t the one acting and much less able to carry out a coherent action.

"On the side. But it's nothing"

"Foolishness. Let me help you"

The black-haired man felt hypnotized, to the point where he didn't even resist when one of your hands slipped under his black silk shirt. He shifted slightly at the calculated movements your fingers made, feeling his skin until you found the point of attention and attended to it. Little by little he felt the burning decrease and he let himself be carried away by the pleasant chill that he experienced every time you cured one of his ailments. He closed his eyes for a moment to surrender to the sensation and suddenly that was replaced by a tide that began to suffocate him.

He was drowning again, among rotting corpses and slimy skins.

"Enough…"

“Shh…” you said at the same time, unwilling to let go and planting your palm firmly “It's okay, Kaz. Everything's fine"

"Let me go"

“No, no, darling. Everything is fine, it's me who touches you…” he could have sworn that your voice was a spell, because he felt incapable of disobeying “Just open your eyes and look at me.”

You were too close to him when he opened his eyes and sure enough, all traces of anxiety disappeared. Your hand traced the same path to the outside of his shirt and then kindly placed itself on his pajama pants. It was a gentle touch.

"What are you doing here?" he insisted. He knew he needed the answer to that question to become aware of something that everything around him was screaming at him, but he still didn't know what it was.

“I came back to take care of you, of course. And because I have missed you so much” you explained simply, using that voice that was making him dizzy.

"But you…"

“I think you should lie down now,” you interrupted him. Kaz was racking his brain for what was wrong with the situation, although he found it difficult to concentrate on anything because of your hand caressing his leg.

"Wait"

“I was wrong to sneak in here so late at night, but I needed to know you were okay,” you continued. “That drunk gave you a lot of trouble, didn't he?”

Something clicked on him. You had not been present at the time, so you couldn't know about the altercation.

“Are you real?” he finally asked.

That was the right question. He shouldn't have been wondering what you were doing like that, but rather whether you were really there.

There was no response, as had already happened, and you just smiled kindly at him.

“I'll help you; I know sometimes you can't sleep.”

Kaz was going to ask something else, but suddenly your hand was placed on his chest and he began to feel his entire body relax. His pace slowed, his eyelids began to feel heavy, and any attempt at logical thought was lost in the void. It was just you, dressed in scarlet and looking at him sweetly from your position on the bed.

“Y/N…”

"Relax, I have deprived you of enough rest" you exclaimed. He couldn't complain because you were taking care of knocking him out to the point where his body was already lying down and you were just a blur. “We'll talk tomorrow, okay?”

He was struggling to stay conscious, to try to understand why he wasn't in a crisis because of how you were touching him, and to understand how you had gotten from Ravka to this point, but your Grisha powers were getting in the way.

Just like that, he was still awake enough when you leaned closer in his direction and, against all odds, brought your face close enough to cover him with a kiss on the lips. Everything in him stirred at the tender and deep touch that you were offering him, with his body unable to resist not only your intervention but also the feeling of peace and security that was overwhelming him.

You continued kissing him for so long that he began to gasp for air and when he wanted to break away to breathe, you continued. And you continued, and continued, until the pleasant warmth that was in him turned into a bonfire that began to burn his lungs.

A bonfire, then water... water that was suddenly drowning him.

A second later Brekker stood up suddenly, again, in a cold sweat and breathing heavily. All the panic exploded at that moment and then he realized what he hadn’t been able to decipher in your presence: it had all been a dream.

He confirmed his theory by getting up from the mattress, his bad leg throbbing with pain, and looked at himself in the smudged mirror he had somewhere. His face still had the same bruises that you had apparently taken care of healing.

He looked in all directions looking for a trace of you, but found nothing. There weren’t even signs that the lamp had been lit. He had been hallucinating everything, there were no further explanations.

“Kaz?” Someone called him and the fear that it was you paralyzed him. “Boss? I'm Jesper. A shipment arrived…”

“I'll be right over,” he half shouted, his voice raspier than normal. The day had barely started and he was already in a bad mood.

Jesper didn't say anything, but the man heard his footsteps receding down the hallway and then he walked to the tub and the water with which he washed himself every day. When he had nightmares, washing his hands was useful to cleanse himself of the guilt that overwhelmed him, but now... his hands would definitely not be enough. It would have been necessary to cleanse his entire mind to the core to get rid of the images.

Why had he dreamed of you? He hadn't heard from you in months. After the group had helped destroy the shadow, King Nikolai and those close to him suggested that, if you wanted it, you would have a place in the eccentric group of Grisha who would help rebuild the second army. Kaz was present when they made you the offer and although you responded that you needed time to think about it, the expressions on your face revealed to him the position you were leaning towards.

He didn't blame you for the decision you made, but he didn't express pleasure either. He knew perfectly well your life story and how, after the death of your entire squad on a spy mission, you had ended up in Kerch. No one from Ravka bothered to look for you and you never bothered to return, since you had discovered that the person who sold the secrets of your entrustment to the Fjerdans had been one of your own Grisha companions. If you couldn't trust them, then who? Furthermore, General Kirigan had made sure to earn your contempt after the inappropriate behavior he had begun to engage in towards you. The fear that something would happen to you under his command was greater than the thought of what would happen if they accused you of being a deserter. In Ketterdam no one knew you, so you could start from scratch as someone different.

Kaz had taken you under his wing after by chance you had been in the same place as them when a fight between gangs had developed and in which Inej (a new arrival to the Dregs) had been mortally wounded; you had helped her when you saw her bleeding in an alley and both she and her two other friends were totally grateful. The rest was history.

Having dreamed of you didn’t represent a problem for him, after all it would only be his subconscious reminding him of your existence, however, what was a problem had been the development of it. Kaz was surprised to think that it had been his own mind that had caused him to construct a fantasy in which you behaved so gently and affectionately, to the point of kissing him on the lips. It hadn't been you, of course, but... him? As the boy washed his hands, seeking some comfort, he wondered if he subconsciously wanted you to do something like that. It couldn't be possible.

You had to admit that he cared about you, like the rest of your friends, although he had never thought of you in any way beyond that of a work colleague. You were a valuable member of the team, he wouldn't have to be imagining that you were sneaking in to look for him in the middle of the night to shower him with attention and kisses. It was just ridiculous.

Still somewhat confused, he tried to push all those thoughts out of his mind and then changed out of his pajamas to go to wherever the shipment that Jesper had mentioned was. He thought that the day's activities would probably help him get rid of that strange bittersweet feeling that your fictitious visit had left him.

“Hey, Kaz, have you heard from Y/N?”

The question Jesper asked while he was signing the receipt for several cases of whiskey threw him off and he swore his friend was asking just to spite him. But he couldn't know about the shameful dream, of course. Neither he nor anyone.

"Nothing. The last letter was sent a week after we returned and since then there has been nothing”

“Oh,” he sighed. He seemed almost disappointed. “What about Inej?”

“I learned that their ship was heading to the Wandering Isle and that thanks to her suggestions the crew is freeing slaves.”

“I miss both,” the boy murmured, quite thoughtful.

Kaz looked at him with that usual annoyed expression and Jesper took it as a scolding for how cheesy he was being. However, Kaz actually felt upset because his friend was reminding him that he was in the same situation.

I've missed you so much, you said in your dream. He began to reflect on whether it had been an internal desire to hear those words that reflected the fact that he was the one who missed you.

“Take those boxes inside and put them in place. If I notice that even one bottle is missing, there will be problems,” he warned him. Normally it wasn't Jesper who was in charge of those tasks, but at that moment what the boss wanted was to get rid of him and his inappropriate comments.

“Where are you going?”

“To some matters” was all the response he offered, before limping off in another direction.

It wasn't entirely true that he would be busy during the day, but he decided it would be better to get away from there to clear his thoughts. Without Inej in the city it was more difficult to obtain any secrets and now the collection of information depended on the girls who had left the menagerie to go work with him, so it didn't hurt to walk around the Barrel from time to time to see what I could find out.

The walk served to keep him busy and sufficiently distracted, at least until midday, when he returned to the Slat to eat something. There he received the news that someone was selling a property near the now renovated Crow Club and then he spent part of the afternoon analyzing how convenient it would be to acquire the property to expand his business.

Every night he liked to go to the club to check that everything was going well and solve any situation that required his attention, like the aggressive drunk had been the night before. Furthermore, he had to make sure that none of his crows got into trouble and above all that Jesper didn't lose more money than he could in gambling. Although of course, he already had Wylan to keep an eye on him.

He regularly spent the entire day in his office, working on other things, and only went out to the games area and the bar if necessary. But something that night, that strange feeling he had since he woke up, made him leave the room where he worked. He began to walk around the bar, from where he could see all the people enjoying the bets and drinks, while he looked for his friends. Normally Nina stayed at the Slat, but Jesper and Wylan manned the door or the bar. That night it was the zemeni's turn to watch and Kaz rolled his eyes when he noticed that he was talking animatedly to a girl, or who he assumed was one; Jesper's body covered the person and he could only see a piece of a scarlet dress.

“Shall I get you something, boss?” the bartender asked the black-haired man, who turned his head to deny.

When Kaz returned his face to the front he felt like he was choking on his own saliva at the pair of people walking happily in his direction.

“Kaz! Look who came to visit us!”

Jesper held your hand and was impatiently pulling you through the sea of people, wanting you to meet your friend as soon as possible. But, contrary to the happiness that could be expected with a reunion, Kaz was pale and looked completely worried.

“Y/N?” he murmured, fearing that you were once again just a figment of his imagination.

“Just this morning I was talking about how much I missed you, wasn't that right, Kaz?” laughed Jesper “And now you’re here!”

"Hello"

"What are you doing here?"

Although he tried not to sound hostile, he didn't quite succeed.

“Saints, what did you do to yourself?” you laughed, taking a moment to look at the aforementioned's wounds. Noticing the parallel with his dream, he felt dizzy and before he could get closer, he had already walked away. “Kaz?”

"It's no big deal. It was just a fight”

“I hope not with him”

“If it had been with me, his face probably wouldn't look like that and my face wouldn't look like that” Jesper pointed out and you laughed, because it was true.

“Do you want me to take care of it?” you suggested kindly. It wasn't a bother at all, nor would it be the first time.

“At another time. We don't want you to draw attention to yourself” the boy took a pointed look around the room in search of strange eyes that were peering into your conversation, but he found nothing. Everyone was minding their own business. “Enough with those clothes.”

"You don’t like?"

“It's not that I don't like it,” he clarified. “It's just that it's hard to take my eyes off you.”

Kaz didn't flirt, but if he did, that phrase would have been the closest thing to trying. He meant that wearing those clothes you looked so pretty that the idea of the men in the club seeing you made him sick, much less did he need them to know that you were a grisha because they would seek to take advantage of you. But saying it out loud would have been inappropriate, so he kept it to himself.

“It's too red, right?” you laughed, without any clue of the intention behind the phrase “A gift from Her Majesty the Queen, by the way. She put one of her tailors at my disposal.”

“Oh là là, girl. Are you sure you want to see us now that you only rub shoulders with fine people?”

“Of course I want to see you, fool. You are like family”

Brekker watched in silence as you leaned your entire body against Jesper, letting him put his arm around you to close the distance to nothing. The dress you wore had a high collar and buttons along the chest, along with sleeves three-quarters of the way up your arms. He immediately thought of the uniforms of the second army (the old ones, since Alina had eliminated the colors that divided Grisha's orders) and again he felt a tingling down his spine when he remembered his dream.

We'll talk tomorrow, okay? you had said. Was that dream a premonition? Or could it be that you had really visited him in the middle of the darkness?

"When you came?"

"Newly. I rented a carriage because Anika told me you were here, when I stopped by the Slat to leave my things.”

“Do you intend to stay?”

"A couple of days. I know I didn’t even ask if I could stay with you, but I figured… well, I can stay, right?”

“Of course you can,” the gunman interrupted, sounding excited.

Kaz continued with a serious expression.

“As long as there are rooms available,” he simply said.

There were and he knew it, so you responded, smiling widely in gratitude. Before either of them could say anything else, Jesper stepped forward:

“Let's go so you can say hello to Wylan, he's taking care of some tables over there.”

With a movement the boy took your hand and turned you towards his direction, away from the black-haired man. Despite the direction you followed with your body, your eyes searched Kaz's gaze in the hope of finding something more than what he had said verbally, although you didn't find it. Your free hand reached out to temporarily wave goodbye to the young man, to which he only responded by bowing his head slightly.

Kaz caught a glimpse of the entire exchange; Wylan threw himself into your arms as soon as he saw you and you welcomed him with joy, even planting a kiss on his cheek that made him laugh. Suddenly, as he watched, he found himself feeling jealous of his friends.

He wasn't like Jesper who could take you by the hand everywhere, nor like Wylan who seemed to love being in your arms. And he knew that Nina, as soon as she knew you were back, wouldn't hesitate to express her affection in the same way. For a second, he reflected that the touch of your skin was a longing that he kept in his heart, well hidden behind all that tide of despair and disgust at human contact.

He also wondered if he wasn't dreaming again, afraid that your return was just another twisted fantasy his mind had fabricated. But it wasn't like that, he could feel everything around him and the smells of the place invaded his nostrils; even his leg burned slightly as a permanent reminder that he was alive.

Kaz took one last glance in your direction, still hypnotized by the bloody tone on your clothes, and considered that it would be best to return to his office to continue with the pending work. A few minutes later you went back to look for him to try to drink something but, unfortunately, you realized that he was no longer there.

Thanks to Jesper and his insistence that you drink everything new in the repertoire of the renewed Crow Club, you arrived much later than expected at the Slat. The Dregs never seemed to sleep, and you knew it was probably because Kaz wanted a twenty-four-hour guard, so when you staggered in one of the new guys greeted you curtly and let you pass.

You and Anika had always gotten along well, so when you arrived hours ago she had placed you in the largest room the place had, next to where Inej had once been and down the hall from Kaz's office and bedroom.

You had to admit that your friend's reaction to your arrival had left you somewhat worried, because although it was to be expected that the black-haired man wouldn’t show great joy, you felt that something about your visit had made him uncomfortable. You had probably taken too many liberties in assuming, without consulting him, that you were still welcomed and thought you had to talk to him about it.

When you went to your room you noticed that his light was still on and since the alcohol didn't let you think too well, you convinced yourself that it would be a good idea to visit him despite the schedule. Before going to your task you made sure to search through your suitcase for a couple of things that you had brought from Ravka especially for Kaz and while you did so you tried to shake off the guilt that invaded you when you saw that almost all of your belongings were back in Ketterdam. You hoped that by talking to him he would be able to understand, otherwise you didn't know what you would do from now on.

You snuck down the hallway with bare feet and one of your hands busy, until you arrived in front of the half-open door.

"Busy?" you asked, peering around the frame as you tapped the moth-eaten wood a couple of times.

Kaz was sitting at his desk and only raised his head from the papers scattered across it because he recognized your voice as the one calling him. He seemed exhausted, as if thinking was consuming his entire life.

“A bit. Did you just arrive?”

“Yes,” you laughed, cringing with some shame. Kaz looked you up and down and noticed that your dress, previously so neat and pretty, looked slightly disheveled, although it didn't lose its beauty. Your hair was also less combed than at the beginning “Can I come in?”

The man responded by nodding his head and followed your steps in silence, until you dropped into the chair in front of his desk; he noticed that you were carrying a prominent package in your hands. Your gaze held his for a few seconds, reminding him that you were one of the few people who weren’t afraid to face his discerning eyes and he observed the shine in your orbs accompanied by your blushing cheeks, clear evidence of your drunkenness.

"What do you need?"

“I wanted to know how you are,” you murmured sincerely “In case you wanted me to help with... you know”

It was clear that you were referring to the state of his face. As a healer, part of your job was to detect people's ailments, and boy did Kaz have several. Only what was visible revealed that he had probably been unable to sleep for days, let alone eat. His mental state had never been the most appropriate, but in that space your gift, nor your help, had no place.

“You worry too much sometimes.”

"It looks bad. And it probably hurts.” You slurred a couple of words, but it was still understandable enough. “Let me help you.”

Kaz visibly tensed at your choice of words, immediately remembering the woman from his dreams who had said the same thing, and wishing he could erase those memories. He didn't even realize he hadn't responded until you caught his attention.

"Alright"

With some extra effort to not trip over your own feet, you moved to the other side of the table and squatted down from a safe distance; then, in that position and without touching him directly, you began the appropriate hand movements for healing. The fear of invasion of his personal space immediately dissipated and, just like in his dream, he felt better as he experienced that familiar tingling in his body when you tended to his wounds.

Once you finished, you remained calm for a moment and he felt nervous at the emotions that he couldn't decipher in your eyes. The intoxication visibly relaxed your features so that all the time you were smiling sweetly at him.

"Better?"

“Mhm,” he responded with a hum, fearing that if he opened his mouth his secrets would begin to spill out.

Of course he felt better, as always when you used your skills on him, not only physically but also mentally. It had been so long since he had seen you in his office that he thought he would eventually forget about the feeling, so having you back there felt strangely reassuring.

“I have something I want to show you.”

Wanting not to make your friend uncomfortable, you stood up from your seat, holding on to the desk to avoid falling, and willing to stay as long as Kaz could stand, you returned to your place in front of the desk. Once you took back the package that you had left on the chair, you began to unwrap it to take out one of the objects it contained. He carefully observed the maneuver, realizing that it was a black cardboard box with silver details and even a small bow on the edge, which you left right in front of him.

"What is this?"

"A gift. I brought it from Ravka.”

Kaz's look expressed some confusion at the unexpected gift and he took special care as he opened the box with one of his gloved hands, like someone who fears finding misfortune inside.

“Chocolates?”

“I know you like them,” you replied, shrugging your shoulders “You know, something sweet to counteract the bitterness you have in your character.”

“Looks like visiting your hometown made you funnier, huh?”

“Try one” you suggested excitedly and even though he wanted to do it, the boy didn't have the heart to refuse.

He chose a piece of dark chocolate and when he put it in his mouth, he took the time to savor the treat. Although he wasn’t nostalgic, he was overcome by the distant memory of the hot chocolate that Jordie had once bought him. He hadn't tried that flavor in a long time, and the slight expressions of satisfaction on his face revealed that you had chosen a good gift. He would make sure not to abuse it, but it would be difficult now that he had remembered the delight it represented.

"And? How does it taste?”

“Delicious” he concluded. Sounded sincere and that made you smile.

The night had already embraced Ketterdam and you could see some stars through Kaz's open window, through which a gentle wind blew through the curtains. The landscapes of Ravka had conquered you the moment you set foot there, but you had to admit that you had greatly missed the salty, dirty air of the island that welcomed you when all seemed lost. Even the Slat looked better, although that was perhaps due to the excellent income that the new and renovated Crow Club had.

But more than a physical space, the affection you felt for the place was due to the people who lived there. When you arrived, it was painful not to find comfort in the arms of your friend Inej and you wondered if any of your friends had missed your presence in that way; the effusive hugs combined with the clear joy of the group let you know that this was the case. Kaz was the only one who remained reluctant to any intense display of feelings, although not for the reasons you thought.

"What were you doing?"

“Some accounts,” he sighed bitterly. “This week wasn't the best.”

Anything related to money, for better or worse, was an easy topic of conversation for the black-haired man. He liked to talk about profits, the best bets, investments for the future, and possible traps to gain an advantage. So, knowing that it was a subject he liked, you let him talk.

Through this he gave in and became more and more talkative to answer the questions you asked him, no longer only related to the Crow club. You were able to tell him about the little palace, about the coronation that had taken place a few months ago, about your support for the reconstitution of the Grisha units and about all the policies that the king and queen consort intended to apply.

Kaz listened with surprising attention and when you least expected it, the two of you were already chatting as if the time you were apart had never existed. You liked seeing him this relaxed, it was something that often happened when you guys got together for drinks. You suspected that while you were stuffing alcohol down your throat in public, he had been doing it in private.

“And are you happy there?” he asked suddenly “In Ravka”

You weren’t expecting a question of that type and deep in the lines you wanted to think that you had heard some suspicion in his voice about the possible answer.

"I think so"

“More than here?” he insisted. It was a difficult question, so you took a moment to think about it.

“I think not happier, but… I live better. There are no robberies, no fights between gangs, I have three meals a day every day” you began, smiling slightly at him “But deep down I don't feel happier. I feel like it's all very right, very... fake might be the word? As if a mistake were fatal around so many apparently good people. And it will sound silly, but I think I miss the bad life of the Barrel a little”

“You miss the danger”

“Oh no, we have that in Ravka too. But it doesn't give me the same adrenaline. You know, running away in fear because Jesper had done something stupid, Inej bringing bad news, you resorting to plan Z after the other 25 failed… Do you think I'm crazy?”

“Not at all,” he murmured. “It makes sense that without us your life would be boring.”

A skeptical expression settled on your face.

“Did you just joke or did I hear wrong? Did my absence make you funnier?”

“I've always been funny. And it wasn't a joke, it's a fact."

And with that, your laughter appeared, because it was much easier to make people laugh when you were drunk. The sound filled Kaz's chest with a warmth worthy of shame, especially for him, and tried to ignore the rushes of his heart, hoping you would do the same. You had long ago claimed that you never listened to his heartbeat unless it was necessary, although right now he didn't know if that promise still stood.

He even feared that somehow after your visit to the palace you had obtained powers beyond his understanding and were able to read in his thoughts those dreams he had had before your arrival. The rational part of him knew it was impossible, but the mere idea embarrassed him.

"I guess you're right. “Life becomes monotonous when you no longer have the presence of your manic boss.”

Those words would have earned at least a warning punch from his new cane. But he could forgive your insolence if it meant keeping you in a good mood and, above all, keeping him company.

The movement of your body when you laughed made you aware that you still had an object resting on your legs, which had taken a backseat to the fluidity of the talk. Kaz saw your expression light up when you remembered that you had that mysterious package and then you placed it on the table, carefully unfolding the white piece of cloth that wrapped it.

"What is that?"

“The most wonderful thing you will ever see” Kaz knew about your tendency to exaggerate things, so he tried not to expect too much. “It's the prototype of some Fabrikators in the little palace, it was used on the coronation day. I took it borrowed"

“You stole it”

“I took it borrowed” you repeated seriously, although from your friend's amused face you knew that he didn't believe you “Because I wanted you to see it”

It looked like a strange device, with a lens similar to that of a telescope, but placed in the center of a rectangle and below it a long, linear opening. At the top there was some kind of button. Everything was in black and looked like nothing the boy had ever seen.

“And what is it supposed to do?” He asked, scanning it with his eyes for any clue.

“I could explain it to you, but I'm going to show you. Okay, I take this like this” you began to explain, putting the artifact between you and Kaz. The lens was pointed in his direction “And it's going to sound strange, but I need you to smile.”

“I'm not going to smile”

“It is strictly necessary! Otherwise it won't work."

You were a terrible liar, Kaz had always been aware of that, so he just watched you seriously from his chair.

“Can you at least remove that expression?” you insisted, smiling at your friend in hopes that there was some mimicry on his part. “Please?”

“If you're going to show me, just do it”

“Sweet, always so sweet” you complained out loud and resigned to the fact that that grimace was the only one he would show you, you pointed in his direction to press the button.

A flash of light coming from who knows where threw Kaz off and a few seconds later he watched half a square of paper emerge from the opening in the device. You still had an excited smile on your face as you grabbed the edge of the product with your fingertips.

The boy was too proud to admit that he was curious when you gently shook the sheet, so he just kept watching your movements from his spot for a few minutes. He wasn't prepared for you to drag the chair you were sitting in to the other side of the desk, leaving you a short distance away from him.

"Ready? Ta-dah!”

You happily extended the paper to him and saw his expression of genuine amazement when he could see himself on it. It wasn't even like a drawing, but rather an exceptionally detailed portrait in black and white. Seeing his astonishment you continued:

“Imagine how this would work if you focused it on criminal activities. Heists, if you want to spy on someone, to keep a graphic record of the people who are after your head, whatever you want!” you started, excited “Do you see how much detail it can capture in a second? It can even be used to spy from afar and once you get back here count how many people were talking, who they were, if you want proof of someone making deals…”

Your words were interrupted by an unexpected sound. You highly doubted that you had ever heard Kaz laugh, beyond those ironic sighs he was used to, which is why the laughter froze you completely. You only needed to turn to look at him to reveal your expression; a combination of amazement and fear.

“You will always be a crow, won't you?”

You, too, could detect a mix of emotions in his words, from clear amusement to pride in knowing he was right. It was a forceful declaration: that no matter how many palaces you toured, no matter how many alliances you made, no matter how patriotic those Ravkans wanted to become, you would always belong to the life of the Barrel and, therefore, to the peculiar family that lived in the Slat.

“Please never laugh in my presence again. It's the scariest thing I've ever heard in my life."

The second sigh of amusement was less enthusiastic but more enjoyable for you, even if it was a brief sound that you would try to preserve in your memories. If it wasn’t common to hear him laugh, it was much less common to be the cause of it.

“I must admit that I am quite impressed. You are right to think that it would be very useful for illicit activities.”

“Keep it”

“Didn't you say you borrowed it?”

“You know I was lying”

“And what will your Grisha friends think of this?”

“They'll manage just fine, don't worry. We will put it to better use”

With that, the two of you exchanged a small, but meaningful, knowing look. Kaz still had his portrait in his hands and you replaced it with the device, taking care not to invade too much of his personal space as you knew he hated so much.

“But I will keep this.”

"And what exactly do you want it for?"

“This way I can take you with me wherever I go” your words were sincere and behind them, a clear affection “I like it, you even look… not angry”

“The light disconcerted me”

“I still don’t understand how that works, but we can ask Jesper to fix it,” you suggested gently, trying to make him feel less embarrassed. The truth was that he looked very handsome and his eyes shone the color of the ocean. A beautiful ocean, far from Kerch “Do you want one?”

"One what?"

"A picture. One of mine, of course. That way we would be even”

“I'm not the sentimental type.”

“I know,” you sighed with resignation, “But I am. That's why I'll keep you here."

Kaz watched you put the paper in the pocket inside your coat, on the side of your heart, and he didn't think of anything prudent to respond to that. You would have heard the erratic beating of his heart if you had not been so busy with the rumble of yours.

"I…"

“Kaz also came because I want to talk about something important,” you interrupted him, because you probably wouldn’t have the courage to do it later “Can I?” you asked and he nodded.

Being so close, the smell of liquor that you emanated and that which he emanated combined slightly, during a few torturous seconds of silence. Suddenly the cheerful atmosphere had died down and although Kaz was not an impatient person, the alcohol had slightly clouded his senses.

"What is it?"

“My time here… is not intended to be just a visit”

Were you going to leave him? Was it a farewell then? Maybe that was why you had insisted on taking a portrait of him, one that you would look at from time to time and it would become a distorted blur of a distant time. A ghost.

“And what else would it be?”

There was silence for a moment.

“A permanent stay. If there is still room for me”

During the previous months he had convinced himself to accept that two of his best friends had left to pursue the idea of a better life, away from the hustle and bustle of the barrel, and to some extent he had come to digest the fact. But now the possibility of having you back with him was there and honestly, the most selfish part of him was happy that the little palace hadn't been enough for you.

“Is this a free choice or is there some particular reason that forces you to return here? It's not that it bothers me, but I just… I have to be aware to take my precautions”

“I come clean and of my own free will,” you said, raising both hands. “The King and the queen didn’t take it in the best way, but they did not refuse either.”

“And what is the reason for this sudden change of mind?”

“It wasn't sudden, months passed”

“But you were very convinced that you wanted to stay there.”

Kaz's principles and character made it impossible for him to admit that he had been hurt by your decision to remain in Ravka, but he was, and the subtle venom in the phrase made you aware of this.

“I liked the idea of becoming someone useful. All that fantasy of improving the country, a decent life for the Grisha, fulfilling a purpose, and blah, blah, blah. I think I got a little carried away by the fact that there was a living Saint in the palace and thought... that things would be different. A part of me wanted to feel that this was my place in the world because all my life I dreamed of training hard and reaching the second army, wearing those colored keftas, serving the nation” your voice became sarcastic and you put some quotes in the air “It was most disappointing to feel so out of place being there”

“And you want to go back to street fighting then?”

"Oh no. Now that you are the owner of practically half a Barrel, I highly doubt that anyone will want to mess with me. And the whiskey you serve at the club is a delight worth staying for” again you observed the closest thing to amusement in his features and that made you smile “So what do you say? Do you think the services of a healer are still useful to you?”

“As you just illustrated, fights are less common now. But I'll find something to keep you busy."

“Let's face it, I just healed you. Fights will probably be less common for me, but not for you” you laughed “And at some point you will be grateful for having me here”

Kaz would appreciate having you with him even if you were just hanging out at the Slat or the club. Your absence had only managed to show him how much he could miss you.

“I have to maintain my reputation”

“Yes, but it would be a shame if a bad blow ruined that pretty face”

The boy was aware that his face was already full of scars, spots, and wrinkles from frowning so much, that's why his expression hardened upon hearing your words. He didn't hate your compliments, but it wasn't like he believed them either.

"Go away. You're drunk and I need to work."

Despite the tone of voice, there was a certain affection hidden in those words and you decided to focus on that. You stood up to put the chair back in place and an urge to hug Kaz came over you. However, you knew you had to refrain if you didn't want to end up thrown to the other side of the room.

“Thank you for letting me stay. I'll try not to make too much of a fuss”

That was also a lie, he knew perfectly well the chaos you caused in the company of Jesper and that it would only be a matter of time before it appeared. Still, he nodded to indicate that he was giving you a vote of confidence. You headed towards the door.

“I'm glad you're back,” he said, as you were about to leave. You were afraid you were imagining it, so you turned to look at him.

Both of you wanted to say that you had missed each other, but the intention was lost in the volatility of the air around you.

“Rest, Kaz. If you need anything, look for me, okay?”

The fact that you were now in the same building, a few rooms away, provided the boy with indescribable tranquility.

And when he saw you leave he kept thinking that maybe one day, with enough effort, that strange dream he had could become a reality. For now, it only remained to say that knowing that your return home had been to stay, made his heart feel full again.

#kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #the crows #six of crows #jesper fahey #inej gafha #wylan van eck #nina zenik #mathias helvar #shadow and bone #shadow and bone netflix #kaz brekker x you #kaz brekker fanfic #kaz brekker imagine

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luce-speaks · 2 days

Text

kliff and the friends

last minute submission for day two of @fe-aspec-week 2024!! this one is a little thrown together because i had an idea at the last minute but! here goes!!

—

Kliff has never been particularly fond of other people.

He used to think he just got unlucky, stuck in a tiny village where no one understood the concept of personal space. He dreamed of the day he’d escape them, get out, go anywhere but here, and meet people who were actually decent.

Then he started going to school in the next town over, and with each new person he met, that dream died in front of him. Each and every one of them—over-familiar like Gray, clumsy like Tobin, naive like Alm, or disgustingly romantic like Faye. He hated it. He came back to Ram Village with a disappointed letter from his teacher and a new will to tolerate these idiots so he could safely ignore the rest. He might not fit in, but at least they know him well enough to leave him alone while he’s reading.

—

The war comes on suddenly, like a storm rolling in overnight, and things change. Kliff learns what fire spells can do to a human being, and Gray stops joking about hitting Tobin with his sword, and Faye picks up a lance for the first time, insisting she’ll do whatever it takes to protect her friends. Tolerable acquaintances become battle-allies, people you can trust to have your back. People who could die beside you, any day. There’s no room out here for petty bickering, but sometimes it also feels like there’s no room to get attached. When the war is over, Kliff thinks, they’ll go their separate ways. He probably won’t even miss them.

—

Tobin flags him down at camp one day. “Hey, Kliff!”

He rolls his eyes. “Tobin. I thought you knew not to interrupt me while I’m studying.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know. But I have questions about magic! That counts as study time, right?”

Now Kliff is intrigued, though he refuses to give Tobin the satisfaction. “Since when do you care about magic? I thought it was too complicated for you.”

Tobin settles beside him, keeping a safe distance, but not bothering to ask whether he minds the company. “Well, I don’t really get it. But I want to learn. You know—for the war.”

He sighs. “I don’t know what Alm or Gray did this time, but you’re better with a bow than you’re ever going to be with magic. Focus on getting better at that.”

“Healing magic,” Tobin corrects. “I want to learn healing.”

“What? Why?”

“C’mon, seriously? I’m worried about you guys! I want us to go back to Ram when this is all over—all of us, together. Even if we’re not all planning to stay.”

“…All right, then. I can try to teach you.” Kliff grins. “Though I wouldn’t count on your ability to learn it.”

—

Faye catches him off guard in the middle of an overcrowded mess hall. She’s saying something, but he can’t understand her over the din of too many hungry soldiers. Eventually, she gives up and beckons to the door.

Kliff follows her, plate in hand, out to the cool night air. “What was that for?”

She shrugs. “You looked like you wanted to go outside.”

“I—” He pauses. Mess hall never used to bother him more than any other time around camp, but now that they’ve been getting more recruits, it has been getting louder and louder. He’s never liked loud noises, either. “I guess I did.”

Faye walks a little farther away from the tent, towards the woods. He follows her, and they settle together at the forest’s edge—still in earshot of the camp, but safely away from the clamor of the mess hall.

“I miss Ram,” Faye says quietly, after they’ve been eating for a bit. “Seeing this many people in one place reminds me how far we are from home.”

Kliff snorts. “It just reminds me of school. They always crammed too many people into the common areas for lunch.”

“So you didn’t like leaving then, either?”

“I liked going to school,” he answers. “I didn’t like the people there.”

“What kind of people do you like?”

He thinks on this. “The quiet kind.”

Faye smiles and nods. They eat the rest of their meal in silence.

—

Gray looks out for him during fights.

At first he’s convinced Gray is just showing off, jumping in dramatically and kicking down a mage in mid-chant before they can fire another spell at Kliff. But then it happens a second time, and a third time, and Kliff is more than certain that it’s intentional.

“You don’t have to do that, you know,” Kliff says, the next time Gray takes a blow for him.

“Do what?” Gray asks. “Look super cool while I’m saving the day?”

Kliff regrets that Gray is too focused on the battle to see him roll his eyes. “Protect me. I can look out for myself.”

“Oh, that? I’m just practicing for next time one of the girls needs saving.” Gray pauses to skewer another incoming mage. “Gotta keep my skills sharp and all that!”

“Gray, I’m serious. Can you stop joking around?” Kliff fires off another spell, stopping an approaching cavalier in their tracks. Now there are no more distractions—Gray will have to talk to him.

Gray turns to face him. “Look, I know you can take it, okay? But that’s not your job. If you’re up in the front lines taking hits, you won’t have the energy to cast your spells. So you do your job, and I’ll do mine, yeah?”

He sighs. “Fine.”

“Great! Now how about a ‘thank you’ for saving your ass?”

“In your dreams.”

—

Alm brings him a book from town.

“Here,” he says, unloading it off a pile of rations and weapons. “They had this on sale at one of the booths. I thought you might get some use out of it.”

Kliff inspects it. It’s a neatly-bound red tome, with gold embossing on the front. It looks well-used, but it’s holding together nevertheless. He flips it open, skimming the table of contents, and frowns.

“I hate to break it to you, but this is a book on magical theory. It’s not going to teach me anything I don’t already know about battle casting.”

Alm looks a little offended. “I know,” he says. “I just figured you would like it. You liked learning about magic at school, didn’t you?”

“I did, but—” He frowns again, turning the book over anxiously in his hands. “We’re in the middle of a war. Did you spend army funds on this?”

“Don’t worry, I spent my own money on it. No funds wasted.”

“But—” Kliff stammers. “Why? What’s the point? What do you get out of this?”

Alm sighs. “It’s just a gift. We may be at war, but we’re still people. I want you guys to be happy—at least, when we’re not having to kill people.”

“Oh,” Kliff says. “Uh. Thanks.”

Alm smiles, bright as ever. “Any time.”

—

The war continues, and Kliff keeps dreaming about the places he’ll go once he’s free to travel as he pleases. He’s not sure what kind of people he’ll meet out there, but—he thinks—if they’re anything like the ones he met in Ram Village, he hasn’t got anything to worry about. Other people may be unpleasant—clumsy, naive, romantic, and over-familiar—but they’re still worth knowing, every once in a while.

#luce writes #fe aspec week #day 2: friendship #this is a messsss but i don't care bc i still got it done on time!#fire emblem echoes #kliff #fe kliff #alm #faye #gray #tobin

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inkykeiji · 2 years

Note

clari: dabi dabi dabi dabi dabi ayat-

dabi: 🤨🔥

clari: dabi dabi dabi….

LMAO LITERALLYYYYYYY god anon no joke i was quite literally sitting down to start editing the ayato + thoma piece and went ‘lemme just check tumblr real quick while this opens up’ and BAM he literally slapped me in the face twice

#HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CONCENTRATE NOWWWWWWWWW #okay so i might switch back to the touya-nii piece i was working on lmao #because now i’m so !!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHH I LOVE HIM #BUT I LOVE AYATO AND THOMA AND TARTAGLIA TOO I FEEL OVERWHELMED 。ﾟ(ﾟﾉД｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡#okay like obviously it would take someone truly extraordinary to replace dabi in my heart and i hope he knows that #because everyone else around me sure does LMAO #look he has me speaking as if he has a consciousness HAHAHAHA #anyway it’s been two years and he’s still tied with anakin as my favourite fictional character ever <3 #so it’s safe to say he’s never going anywhere #i hope ur having a great night anon!!!!!#stay safe and don’t forget to drink enough water okay???#i’ll take a sip of mine as soon as it thaws a lil #inky.bb #clari gets mail

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straightouttawaterdeep · 1 month

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Yes Gale is baby, thank you

Omg of course. I think this is my first ask, bless you. I could not agree more!

All I think of all day every day is Gale having the best day of his life being babied so hard that it’s cringe

#A fire books his favorite meal and a safe warm lap for him to sit on while someone rubs his belly.#please he doesn’t need to walk anywhere either his knees hurt #the whole tower is covered in globe of invulnerability forever spells so he never gets hurt #you know if you are playing as gale and talk to this stuffed taxidermized bear he will say:#‘’hey there fella I think I’ll call you Jackamo’’#it’s totally real he’s such a goofy cute guy my god I could go on and on #thank YOU anon lol I’m a little scared to speak on here so this was fun #ask #text

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perilegs · 4 months

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ok but has a man ever told you you have a dainty rook piercing area? i don't think so 😌

#you can't go around calling parts of me dainty even if it's in the most casual professional sense i'll blush #well dainty is the best translation for the word he used (siro) bc dainty doesnt really feel the same as siro even tho they mean the same t #hing #anyways i got my rook piercing today! it went well and besides being hot the piercer was so nice and professional and i really liked #the piercing shop and will get all my future piercings done there as well #it was a very nice safe feeling enironment. safe as in. i wasnt stressed about myself bc the piercer had a pride sticker on a bottle #also like all piercers explain what theyre doing as theyre doing the stuff but he was doing it extra well #also jfc i can never again get a rook piercing bc the experience of laying down facing an extremely attractive man #while he leans over you to penetrate your skin is. well. you can guess how i felt about it #also my bestie got some lobe piercings and they look very cute on her!#and she got some kind of a discount thing for bringing a new person to the shop #leevi talks #im sorry to everyone who has ever worked anywhere where they had to lean over me i cant help getting a mild crush #though i used to work as an amusement park ride operator so ive been on the both sides of this and idc i was just doing my job #and its normal to get a little crush on someone even if theyre just doing their job as long as you dont say anything about it

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corvidcall · 2 years

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i think everyone should take time to think about their religious background and how it impacts their morals, manners, and their idea of what a religion even IS

But also when i do that for myself i think the results are really funny

#anime life #i went to Catholic school but got switched to public school when they raised tuition #my family is Catholic but my dad would leave mass after communion to beat traffic #and we stopped going when they asked him for money too many times #(my mom never took us to church bc my dad told her she wasn't allowed to since she divorced him)#(normal behavior)#but also i grew up in an extremely Jewish neighborhood in an already really Jewish metro area #we lived next to a synagogue. my childhood best friend was the son of the rabbi #also my stepmom is a secular Jew #so its like. YES i am Catholic but im not good at it #when i say I'm Catholic people assume my family must be really conservative #(my mom's a socialist and my dad+stepmom are die hard democrats)#really the main thing that being raised Catholic left me with is that im a shame-based organism #I think pleasure is good and hedonism is good and there's nothing immoral about it but also IM not allowed to do it #why? I don't know. that's not my business #also i remember when Bernie was running i saw some women on twitter say that he yells too much and its scary #which was funny to me because every time i hear him im like 'oh yeah this sounds like every adult i knew as a kid'#'that right there is a friend. feels safe'#anyway i miss living in a really jewish area. i can't get good corned beef ANYWHERE out west #there's no point to this post really #i just think it's funny what a huge presence Judaism has had in my life when im literally Catholic #and also how very bad my family is at being Catholic

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bucketsofmonsters · 5 months

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A Diplomatic Error

cw: enemies to lovers, kidnapping, being tied up, manhandling, size difference, non-human genitalia, oral sex, vaginal sex, unprotected sex

male orc x fem reader

Word count: 9k

You were headed to another counsel meeting. You never really stopped attending them, despite the fact that they never listened to a word you had to say.

Your father said it was good for morale. You didn’t understand how watching someone sit around and not help was good for anyone’s morale, but you knew better than to question him.

The halls of the palace were quieter than you were used to. Almost everyone had been called to the front lines, even your closest guards had gone. You weren’t used to walking alone, nor were you accustomed to the typically lively castle looking like a ghost town.

So now you walked through the castle halls, more alone than you’d ever been before, no one there to wait on you, to protect you, to watch over you. Something in you said it should have felt freeing.

It didn’t. It just felt lonely.

As you walked, moving slowly as you wallowed in self-indulgent pity between war meetings, a pair of hands reached out of nowhere, one snaking around your waist to pull you back into the shadows while the other clamped firmly over your mouth.

When the guards had been sent away, you’d been assured that you’d be safe. It wouldn’t exactly be easy for a hulking orc to sneak in undetected. At least that's what you'd been told. With a massive hand that dwarfed your face locked over your mouth, suddenly the idea didn’t seem so ridiculous.

You thrashed under the figure's unwavering grip to no avail. He easily held you in place, barely needing to put any effort in to stop your desperate bid for an escape.

You weren’t one for swooning but suddenly a faintness came over you. You reached up to grab at the only stable thing in reach, hands wrapping around the figure’s arm, trying to keep yourself upright.

Your knees began to buckle and only then, mind slowed by whatever he’d dosed you with, did you begin to suspect foul play. Maybe something on his skin that humans were weak to, maybe something in the air. Was he holding a cloth? You didn’t think so. But then again, he seemed so far away not, even pressed up against you as he was.

You blinked your heavy eyes and when you opened them, you were thrown over a large shoulder. You watched the road behind you as the creature holding you strode along, still blind to what was ahead. His hand was wrapped around your waist, keeping you firmly in place, jostling you only slightly with each step.

It took you a second to gather your bearings enough to start struggling. Once you did, you started pounding on his back. It was a futile gesture but you were nothing if not persistent. At the very least, he knew you were awake now.

His shoulder shook under you as he chuckled. “Good morning, princess,” he said, his gravelly voice carrying across the road.

“Put me down, you brute!” you shouted, trying your best to kick your feet under heavy skirts. If you'd known you'd be getting kidnapped today, you'd have worn something lighter.

He paused and for a moment you thought maybe he'd listen to you. But you knew better than that, knew you'd have no say in any of this.

“As you wish.”

Your feet were planted on the ground, although he still had a heavy arm on your shoulder, holding you in place. A silent promise: you weren't going anywhere.

You whipped around, eager to see what was in front of you instead of the increasingly distant road you'd been traveling on.

You got your first look at the front of your captor, no longer flung over his shoulder.

Despite it being part of the little information you already knew about him, the first thing you noticed was that he was massive. He towered over you, with a broad frame to match. Tusks stuck out of his mouth as he sneered down at you, marring an almost handsome face.

You’d never actually seen an orc in person and despite years of being at war with them, it struck you suddenly that they were real. They were real and in front of you, no longer threatening figures discussed in crowded rooms you weren’t supposed to speak in but instead a real man in front of you with his hand on your arm. It radiated warmth, applying a firm pressure that told you if he wanted to he could crush you underhand.

In front of you, next to your very real captor, was a camp. The sort of camp you imagined soldiers slept in. You had no idea which side of the border you were on, disputed or otherwise. You hoped you were still in your own kingdom, but you had no way to know. It all looked the same from here.

Amidst the massive canvas tents milled a dozen or so orcs. At your sudden appearance, they’d stopped what they were doing, all peering at their new guest.

As they all stared at you, you panicked. Your feet started moving before your brain did. You managed to slip out from under your captor's grasp just in time to feel his hand dart forward, pushing you into the mud before you had a chance to get anywhere.

As you lay in the dirt, you heard something that sounded like orders being barked in a foreign tongue.

And then you were being hauled to your feet. You didn’t have the presence of mind to be upset at the manhandling as you looked down at your body, the front of you almost completely covered in mud.

You didn’t even have time to protest that before he cut you off. “Come on, m’lady. We have much to discuss.”

You crossed your arms, about to demand more respect from him before you were being lifted again and all you could manage was a surprised little squeak.

You watched helplessly as you were hauled into a nearby tent, all of the towering soldiers staring at you as you went.

You were deposited less than graciously on the floor of the tent, left to flounder and find your bearing on your own as your captor moved to look at you.

The tents were incredibly spacious, at least for someone of your size, the roof towering above you.

He leaned down in front of you, tone condescending as he spoke. “Here’s what's going to happen. You’re a bargaining chip for us. We’ll get you home as soon as your father allows it, princess.” He said your title like an insult, spat it at you in a way that made you flinch.

“And in the meantime?” you asked, trying your best not to look afraid. You'd make your way out of this with your pride intact. Well, as much of your pride as you could still manage to salvage as you stood there, covered in mud.

You could barely see the deep red of your dress under the grime. You didn’t even know how much of it was from your fall and how much you’d picked up on the road.

“In the meantime,” he said, “you will sit around until we need you.”

“Perfect.” You stood, futilely attempting to brush off your skirts as you did and taking a step towards the entrance of the tent. “Well, I should go find a place to rest until I am needed.” It was a long shot but you at least had to try.

Your captor followed you as you backed slowly out of the tent. “I don’t think you understand what’s going on here.”

“What’s the harm in it? Where do you think I’m going to go?” you shouted, gesturing around you at the thick woods. “If I had a death wish, there are far better ways to satisfy it than getting lost in the forest. Attempting to kill you, perhaps.”

He nodded. “It would be more honorable, to die in combat against me.”

You groaned. “Yeah, sure, that’s what I meant. It’d be so honorable of me. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go find somewhere to rest, maybe even clean myself.”

You managed to make it about two steps before his arm wrapped around your waist, lifting you as if you were a ragdoll.

“You’re not going anywhere.”

The words were hissed into your ear as he walked. You thrashed in his grip but it didn’t matter, he hauled you along just as easily.

You were thrown into a new tent next to a massive wooden pole, staked into the ground in the center.

He leaned down next to you, grabbing your arm, easily resisting your attempt to pull it away from him. As he easily held your wrists in one hand, the other reached back to pull out a length of rope. His hands were surprisingly nimble, threading rope around your wrists and securing you to the pole at the center of the tent with little difficulty.

When he let his hands get a little too close to your face, you bit them as hard as you could, locking your jaw down on him. There wasn’t any strategy behind it, you couldn’t escape or go anywhere, but the way he hissed and yanked his arm back filled you with a little bit of self-satisfaction. That had to be worth something.

He didn’t stick around long after. It seemed you had managed to piss him off at some stage in the kidnapping process. You couldn’t imagine when.

Your first night in the orc camp was spent restlessly, pulling futilely at your bindings as you sat there on the floor. You tried not to wallow in your misery. This wouldn’t be forever. Your father would get you out of here, one way or another. Until then, you could put on a brave face.

As the sun began to rise, the orcs’ curiosity in you seemed to reawaken.

Occasionally a soldier would peek in the entrance of the tent, never for more than a few seconds, or you would see them silhouetted against the canvas, hovering nearby. When you got particularly frustrated you’d shout at them, the snorts of laughter your yelling drew from them only making you angrier.

But anger was good. At least anger felt productive.

You’d become accustomed enough to the curiosity of the soldiers that at first, when your captor returned, you didn’t notice it was him. It was only when he strode towards you and began to undo your bindings that you realized who he was.

The second your bindings were undone, you made a break for it. You didn’t make it far. Your captor held you by your ankle, dangling you upside down, your various muddied skirt layers falling to cover your face as you struggled.

“This will be easier for you if you behave,” he said, and you could hear a layer of irritation in his voice.

You would've spat in his face if there weren't layers of fabric hanging in front of you.

His attempts to right you were thwarted by your thrashing until you figured out what he was trying to do and attempted to still yourself as much as you could, if only to get your feet on the ground again.

“We’re moving,” he said as you steadied yourself when returned back to solid ground. “I can carry you or you can walk.”

You opted to walk, both to preserve your dignity and to attempt to plan an escape.

The soldiers were shockingly efficient, completely packing up the camp faster than you’d imagined possible.

And then you were on the move.

You had to move swiftly to keep up with them, none of the soldiers willing to slow for you.

Your captor stayed diligently by your side, occasionally shooting you looks that seemed intended to tell you you had no chance of escape. You ignored him.

After about an hour of moving quietly, out of breath from all the walking, he was the one to break the silence.

“You’re slow.”

“Your legs are longer than mine. Besides, it's hard to walk when you’re covered in filth” you said, struggling under stiff, heavy skirts.

“And who is to blame for that?”

You gave him a pointed look. “In fact, I think you’ll find that you are.”

“You shouldn’t have run,” he said with a grunt.

“You shouldn’t have pushed me!”

He rolled his eyes and then you were being hauled off the ground again. You yelped in protest but were quietly a little grateful as he sat you on his shoulder. If you had to keep moving at their pace all day, dressed as you were, you might’ve passed out.

It wasn’t your fault you couldn’t keep up with a well-trained group of soliders. If anything, they should be impressed you managed to keep pace as long as you did.

Your hand rested on his other shoulder as he moved, trying to keep yourself steady, but realistically, you knew he wouldn’t let you fall, his arm holding you easily in place. You were just glad you were being allowed to sit this time instead of being thrown around like a sack of potatoes.

You spent the rest of the day like that, sitting on his shoulder as they traveled. As the sun began to set and the others began to set up camp, you expected to be set down.

It seemed you were wrong.

Instead of placing you on the ground or even tying you up again, he began to pace off in the opposite direction of the rest of the camp.

Nerves began to take over you. He may have said nothing would happen to you, but you did not relish in the thought of being alone with him, let alone him intentionally dragging you away from the rest of his compatriots.

You began to squirm again and his arm tightened, holding you in place. “Settle,” he said, his voice low and calm.

You did not listen.

Eventually, he did set you down, although you did not think your thrashing encouraged him to do so.

As he did, you noticed the sound of a swift-moving river just behind you.

He nudged you towards the river. “Clean. You’re too slow.”

“What?”

“You wanted to be clean,” he said, nudging you again. "You should clean”

“It’s a river.”

He looked at you like he was worried you’d hit your head. “It is.”

“And you expect me to wash in there? It’s full of dirt!”

He chuckled and you considered biting him again. “You’ll survive, princess.”

You groaned but decided that anything was better than the mud you were caked in. It was running water, at the very least. You weren’t certain why, but it did feel a little cleaner that way.

You considered bathing fully clothed but you’d heard too many stories of women drowning, weighed down by layers of dresses.

You began to pull at your dress, stripping off some of the upper layers, glaring at your captor as you did. It was too much to ask to be left alone, you knew that much, but it was still humiliating to get undressed in front of him like this.

You only took off as many layers as you needed to ensure you wouldn’t drown. You were almost fully covered but still, you felt exposed.

At the very least, he seemed largely disinterested in what you were doing, only sparing you the occasional glance.

You covered your chest as you moved towards the water. He looked down at you as you did, head cocked to the side. “What are you doing?”

“The skirts are heavy, I can’t wear them in the water or I could drown.”

He scoffed. “Little weakling. That’s not what I asked though, why do you hide? You’re covered.”

“I’m being forced to strip to my underwear, of course I’m covering myself.”

He stared back, clearly still confused, and you realized as you looked at him that the idea of being properly dressed was probably not the same for him. He was covered, but largely in leathers and furs, with far more skin exposed than you would ever have, even now in your underskirts.

“Listen,” you said, trying not to be too antagonistic, as it seemed he was truly trying to understand. “It’s different for us. Especially for me, I’m supposed to be covered perfectly at all times. Maybe you should give me new clothes.”

“Why would I do that?” he asked dismissively.

Any patience you’d been trying to put on for him snapped. “Sorry, I forgot you’re a heartless brute, I don’t know why I asked.”

And with that, you stormed off into freezing cold water.

The mud caking your skin began to wash off as soon as you touched the water and you let out a sigh of relief. The river looked to be snow runoff from a nearby mountain, it certainly felt cold enough for it, but for now all you wanted was to be clean.

You looked down as you scrubbed at your skin and your skirts and as you did, you realized the whites of your underthings had become translucent in the freezing water.

You turned and caught him staring, both looking away as soon as your eyes met. You turned your back to him immediately, feeling tears pricking at your eyes, trying to cover it up with the water that was rushing over you. It felt like you had nothing left, like this was the ultimate humiliation.

When you turned back to look at him once more, he was gone, not making so much as a sound as he left.

You weren’t foolish enough to think he’d truly left you alone, but you appreciated having at least the pretense of privacy. It was shockingly… kind?

No. You pushed the thought out of your mind as quickly as it occurred to you. You would not start thinking like that, not about the man who had kidnapped you.

You finished bathing quickly, the chill starting to set into your bones.

As you waded out of the river, he was still missing. It was evident where he’d been, massive orcs weren’t exactly built for stealth, but still he was nowhere to be found.

In his stead, you found a pile of clothes lying on the bank of the river. As you lifted them, the first thing you noticed was while they were far too big for you, they were too big by human standards. It was an old shirt, well worn, and a pair of pants you’d have to find some way to tie to keep up properly. They were slightly torn and upon closer inspection, you found speckles of a dark rusty substance splattered across the shirt.

Someone’s blood. From who’s side, you’d never know.

You tried not to dwell on what had happened to the owner of these clothes to leave them in the orc’s possession. They were yours now.

They were far more practical than your fine skirts had been, even if they didn’t quite fit properly.

As you pulled them on, you hesitated, holding your skirts. You didn’t need them any longer, but it felt like a waste to just leave them here.

But you had no time for sentimentality right now. You cast them aside, opting to forgo your shoes, despite the lack of new ones. Your shoes from the palace were not exactly built for forests and rough terrain. They’d only slow you down.

As you finished dressing, situating yourself in the unfamiliar clothes as best you could, you looked around nervously. You could find no sign of your captor amidst the unfamiliar foliage, but you had more than enough reason to doubt yourself. You felt lost amidst the thick trees surrounding you, it was hard to tell where you stood. You didn’t know what to look for or how to orient yourself, trapped in a foreign landscape.

You did what you could, checking for any onlookers, peeking through the trees, and once you’d made your decision, taking off.

You had no idea where you were, or where you were running to, but anywhere was better than here. There were surely search parties looking for you and even if you were on the other side of the border, orc civilians or soldiers who were unfamiliar with your status were a better bet than your current captors.

As your bare feet pounded down on a floor of sticks and rocks, you tried to ignore how cut up they were getting.

You were faster this way. That was what counted.

You focused on moving as fast as you could, the determination drowning out the pain until suddenly, the sharp rocks and twigs were underfoot no longer. Your brain took a second to catch up, feet still moving down to try and push off of a ground that was being pulled further and further away.

“Predictable little thing,” said a familiar voice beside you. “What happened to attempting to best me in combat? I didn’t take you for a coward, princess.”

A frustrated scream escaped you, cutting through the peaceful quiet of the forest.

Despite your protests, he continued to haul you back towards the camp, tying you up as soon as you reached your tent, a practiced routine for the two of you by now.

You had the night to sleep off your anger before morning came and you were on the move again.

Your captor did not wait before lifting you onto his shoulder and this time, you did not fight him. It was preferable to running to keep up with them, especially on newly damaged feet.

It felt strange to sit there, without struggling or screaming, just moving in silence. So instead, you spoke.

“Do you have a name?”

“Drakar,” he said. His voice was low but with your position atop his shoulder, it was easy to hear him, even over the bustle of moving soldiers.

“Thank you for the clothes,” you tried again, wanting to start up any sort of conversation to break the silence.

He didn’t even grace you with words this time, giving you a simple acknowledging grunt in return.

His answers remained brief, with no apparent interest in engaging in conversation. Eventually, you stopped trying.

When you came to a stop and the soldiers began to set up camp around you, you waited for your chance.

The second Drakar turned his back to you, you were off.

Another orc caught you in a heartbeat, hoisting you off the ground until Drakar could come fetch you.

He dragged you off with a huff, scowling at you as he set you down. “Why do you continue to fight and run? I’ve told you of our plans to trade you, you’ll fare better with us than on your own in the wilds.”

“I have no desire to be a bargaining chip against my own people. Besides, I’m no fool. I know good things don’t often happen to soldier’s prisoners.”

He scoffed. “Your soldiers, maybe. We have honor, unlike them. And you call us the monsters.”

“Monsters? Maybe. Uncivilized at the very least.”

“I assure you, your soldiers in my country are living in no more luxury than we are here.”

So you were still in your country, not yet over the border. If you could just get away, your chances were good. “Well, then they’re uncivilized dogs just like you,” you spat.

He never seemed to find your outbursts anything other than vaguely annoying or passively amusing. Right now, he seemed inclined towards amusement, despite your latest escape attempt. It was for the best, that tended to work out better for you. It was irritating nonetheless. “Perhaps.”

Your enlightening conversation was cut short as a horn sounded, a familiar announcing horn. The sound of one of your people. Drakar’s head perked up and before you understood what was happening, your legs were being bound together, untethered but severely limiting your movement. You might be able to move like this, but you couldn’t get far.

He did not feel the need to explain this to you or threaten you with hunting you down, trusting you to come to your own conclusions as he strode off in the direction of the horn.

You might not be able to run, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t do anything. The least you could do was try to gather information, so you could be useful when you were saved.

If you were saved.

You managed to scoot your way towards the back of the tent Drakar had retreated to, out of sight of any of the soldiers, just close enough that you could peek under the thick fabric of the walls.

Drakar’s back was to you. You could barely see the messenger from your spot on the floor, his body blocking your vision. You could just see the tip of a feather, presumably stuck in a hat, bobbing as the messenger spoke.

As you got close enough to listen in, you caught Drakar mid-sentence. “- does your king think about our terms for his precious daughter?”

You held your breath, trying not to get your hopes up. This was a war. They couldn’t just be giving in to the first demands given. This could be a long, arduous process. You understood that, would never blame him for it. The country came first.

“The king rejects your terms.” You tried not to let it get to you. You knew this would probably happen, could understand exactly where your father was coming from. The messenger continued on, unaware of your quiet heartbreak. “Furthermore, he would like to close negotiations on this matter.”

You could not hold in the gasp that came at his words. You saw Drakar stiffen and knew he’d heard you, knew he’d figured out exactly what you’d been doing. A moment passed and he untensed his shoulders and continued on. You silently thanked him. You were in no state to face anyone right now.

“What do you mean close negotiations?” he asked, and you choked back tears.

You cursed yourself for putting yourself in such a tight spot. You didn’t think you could manage a quiet escape, at least not without being noticed, not in your current state, so instead you sat, a captive audience to a discussion of why your family had given up on you.

The messenger cleared his throat. “We do not negotiate with beasts.”

“So he chooses instead to abandon his daughter with them?”

The messenger disregarded his words entirely, his voice squeaking as he cried out, “You creatures will pay for the loss of his daughter.”

“She is not lost yet. He is choosing that fate for her, not I,” he hissed out.

“I have said all I was bidden to say. Do you have a message for the king?”

“Tell him if I see him or any of his scrawny little messengers again, I’ll rip them in two.”

With a little yelp, the messenger retreated. Drakar stood for a moment, the sound of his heavy breathing filling the tent.

After a moment, the canvas of the tent was lifted and your hiding place was revealed. You sat, crumpled, on the ground, bile rising in your throat.

That was it. There was no one coming.

He hauled you to your feet, undoing your bindings.

“What did you ask for me?” you asked as he undid the ropes, keeping you propped up on him as he worked.

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It does!” you snapped. You needed to know what was so much more important than you, what you’d been given up for. “You will tell me. I’ve earned that much.”

“A full retreat. It never would have been taken, it was just supposed to be a start to the negotiations.”

“Hmm.” It was a ridiculous ask, obviously so. But to dismiss you completely? To not even try?

Drakar pulled you out of your thoughts with a question. “Would you even want to go back now? If I let you go?”

Your brows furrowed. “You can’t let me go. It would show weakness, show you’ll roll over if your terms aren’t met.”

“I know, it was just a question. So what do I do with you now?”

You shrugged. “You could kill me.”

“No. We won’t be doing that. I should have killed him, though. The audacity of them sending a little snot-nosed fool to tell me negotiations were over. I should’ve gutted him.”

“Why didn’t you?”

He spared you a look that said more than you were sure he wanted it to, rage and concern both written across his face. “I had other things on my mind.”

He tried to speak to you again but you’d begun to shut down. It was all too much, you could do no more.

It didn’t seem too unreasonable a reaction. Your life had just ended, severed by your father without even a real rescue attempt.

But even if you’d shut down, the world had not.

And so it continued. Drakar seemed to have decided you were still useful somehow because every day you were hauled along with his troops, and every day you were given your own little tent.

He didn’t keep you tied up anymore. It wasn’t because you’d become docile, you’d attempted many escapes and he’d found you and brought you back every time. You weren’t entirely sure why you were no longer being tied up. Maybe it was because you weren’t valuable anymore.

You didn’t fully understand why you hadn’t been killed yet. What more could you do for them?

As days passed, the grief lessened to more practical thoughts, thoughts about your future. What was there for you now? Why were you still here? What else could they want from you?

You wanted answers.

You stood and stormed off. Several of the soldiers around you went to grab you until they realized that you were not headed out, but instead towards Drakar’s tent, letting you continue on your warpath.

You started to shout as soon as you entered the tent and he whipped around to face you. “You should kill me. Why won’t you kill me? What do you want from me? Whatever it is, I won’t give it. I have nothing to give. I don’t understand what’s wrong with you.”

He watched your outburst with a level of amusement on his face that made you want to attack him. “Are you done?”

You ran at him, trying to claw at him, bite him, anything. He restrained you easily, pinning you against him, but still, it fed something in you, trying to do something.

You felt him chuckle behind you and if you weren’t pinned down, you would have attacked him again.

“See,” he asked, and you felt the rumble of his voice through his chest. “You’ll be fine. You’re a fighter.”

“I will not fight for you,” you spat.

“I don’t expect you to. But you will fight for you. Nothing is over.”

He released you from his grip and before you could decide what to do with your newfound freedom, someone came crashing into the tent, armor shining a bright silver. He stood, ready to attack, sword in hand, but the second he saw you he froze. “You’re dead,” he choked out, words muffled through the metal of the armor.

You didn’t have a chance to respond before Drakar had thrown him halfway across the camp, orc soldiers rushing over to finish him off. He didn't stand a chance.

You stared at the spot he had just been in, processing his words, before slowly turning to Drakar.

“What was that?”

“An attacker. A foolish little man.”

You shook your head. “No not… why did he think I was dead?’

“Princess, the whole world thinks you’re dead.”

You head snapped up to look at him. “Why?”

“Because I told them.”

You reeled back. “Why would you do that? I didn’t ask you to say that.”

“Your people didn’t seem to care.”

“Oh, thank you so much then. As long as they didn’t care, then it’s fine. You speak of honor and then do this. Why? To torture me? Make sure I have nowhere to go and ensure that I know I am not loved?”

You’d had enough of this conversation, turning heel and storming off without another word, set on putting as much distance as possible between you and them.

You vaguely heard orders being barked to follow you, but that didn't stop you from running.

It didn’t change anything. No matter how far you ran, you had nowhere to go.

Drakar didn’t follow you himself, instead sending someone else to do his dirty work. A few orcs stood behind you, easily able to keep track of you and match your pace.

You weren’t even given a full hour of feigned freedom before one of them had picked you up and started pulling you back towards camp. You fought them the whole way.

You were set down in front of him, the whole process embarrassing. You straightened your ill-fitted pants as you desperately tried to regain any ounce of dignity.

Despite your appearance, he didn’t seem amused. “You shouldn’t run.”

“So you saw fit to have me kidnapped? Again?”

“I had to tell them you were dead,” he said, pushing past your outburst.

You scoffed. “You didn’t have to do anything.”

“I have orders to kill you. The negotiations failed, my people wanted you dead. It was the only way out of this for you.”

Oh. There was no reprieve for you on either side. You’d known your father had signed your death warrant with his refusal to negotiate but now the orders had been given.

“Then why am I still here?” you asked, your voice smaller than you would’ve liked.

“It is not just. I will not kill you.”

“So what now?”

“No one knows what you look like,” he said, his voice soft and low. “It doesn’t have to be over.”

It didn’t matter. Both sides had condemned you. You had your life, but nowhere you could live it. “I have nowhere to go,” you said, sounding braver than you felt.

“You’ll find somewhere. Until then, there’s always room for you in my camp. I displaced you, the burden of this wrong falls to me.”

You rolled your eyes. “And none of your men will send word that you’ve kept me here?”

“As long as they get to keep staring at you, I can’t imagine they’d mind.”

Your nose wrinkled at his words. “These are your honorable men? Letting me stay for the right to keep ogling me?”

“It’s not so odd. They’re fascinated by you, such a strange little thing.”

You supposed you were strange and foreign to them, as they were to you. But surely you weren’t the first, not with the combat they must’ve seen. “You’ve seen humans before.”

“Some of them haven’t. At least, not living ones that aren’t trying to kill us.”

“Who said I’m not trying to kill you.”

He snorted. “Well, you’re doing a piss poor job of it.”

“And if I stay? I won’t fight my own people, even if I was trained in combat. You’ll just carry around dead weight?”

“You’re hardly dead weight. I don’t even notice you up on my shoulder half the time.”

“You know that’d not what I mean.”

“I do. There are towns over the border where you could stay.”

You looked up, curiosity gleaming in your eyes. “They’ll take me? A random human?”

He nodded solemnly. “They will, if you wish to depart. If not… I am the reason your people forsook you. I do not regret it, I did what needed to be done, but I regret what has come to pass to you because of it. You’ve faced this better than I ever thought a human would. They’re cowards to have cast you out, I will not follow in their steps. It may not be what you’re used to, I am no prince and we are no humans, but you’re welcome to stay at my home. You will never be a princess again, that was taken from you. I took that from you. It is only fair to give what I can in return. It is not much, but it is what I have.”

You smiled, swallowing down the lump in your throat and willing away the misty feeling in your eyes. “Thank you. I’d love to stay, if you’ll have me.”

It was no great concession from you, you weren’t exactly drowning in options, but it felt like choosing it all the same. It was no less of a choice than your last home had been, born into it and forbidden to ever really leave.

This was being offered to you. You were being given the opportunity to say no. To run.

As much as Drakar had angered and frustrated you in the past week or so, you weren’t sure you’d ever been given this much respect. Real respect, not the fake respect of being placed in war rooms and told to be silent.

You gave him a final nod and a smile, adding a curtsy that you pulled yourself out of halfway through when you thought better of it, tripping over your feet a little as you did.

His eyes crinkled as he smiled at you and you wondered how you’d never noticed it before.

You went to bed that night feeling lighter, freer than you were used to.

As you left your tent the next morning, you almost tripped over a deer carcass left in your doorway.

You backed away slowly, rushing over to Drakar’s tent.

He was barely dressed for the day, the sun having only half risen past the horizon, and gave you a smile and a nod as he saw you rush into his tent. “Good morning, princess.”

You barely let him finish his sentence before you blurted out, “Someone left a dead animal outside my tent.”

He froze, his shoulders tensing.

You watched, waiting for a response and getting none, before adding, “Should I be concerned? It felt like a threat. Maybe they don’t like that you lied for me, that you're protecting me. Maybe they don’t like me like you think they do.”

“It’s not a threat,” he said with a swift shake of his head.

“How could you know?”

He explained it through barred teeth. “It’s an orchish courting gift. You’ve caught someone’s interest.”

Your breath caught in your chest. “Oh.”

“Oh indeed.” None of the tension had left him and he made no attempt to hide his irritation. “It’s odd, an orc taking an interest in such a frail little thing.”

You rolled your eyes. He was clearly upset that one of his soldiers had become distracted with you, maybe even disgusted at the prospect of one of them taking interest in a human of all things. Clearly your bonding the day before hadn’t taken you that far.

“I don’t know, I’ve heard I can be quite charming.”

He ignored your statement completely, shifting closer to you as he spoke. “You should stay close to me until I can find out who left it and tell them off.” He was being strangely protective almost, the disgust you’d assumed would be there instead entirely absent.

“Why would you tell off my suitor? Surely I should do that myself. Besides, why do you even ca-”

Oh.

The reality of why someone courting you would make him protective set in and you looked up at him with wide eyes

You couldn’t help the shit-eating grin that plastered itself across your face. “Well, maybe I’ll accept it. I’ve got no future now, it couldn’t hurt to have a big, strong orc husband.”

He stood a little straighter as he understood the implication. “You seek protection?”

“Hm, I do, thank goodness I’ve finally found a suitable option, I was really starting to worry.”

Frustration flashed through his eyes as he realized what you were doing. “Fine, we should go find this suitor so we can tell him how graciously you’re accepting this courtship. I, for one, will be glad to be rid of you. Now you’ll be someone else’s problem.”

“We should. Unless there’s something you’d like to say?”

His nostrils flared as he glared down at you. “Nothing.”

“Are you sure? Nothing on your mind? Nothing like, I don’t know, having feelings for the, what is it you keep calling me? The weakling you kidnapped?”

He avoided meeting your eyes as he spoke. “Your force of will is admirable. The odds were against you but still you fought.”

You fought the urge to coo at him, at how flustered he looked and how it seemed like he was forcing out every word. You had no doubt he would rather have left you an animal carcass. You preferred it this way.

“I’m going to need you to be more direct than that.” Your voice was patient and kind and you could tell it was making things a hundred times worse for him.

“I had intentions to look into human courting, to find something familiar for you amidst so many new things you’ve been forced into. But given the situation, I suppose I can just tell you.”

“Tell me what?” you asked. You were going to make him say it, you didn’t care how long it took.

“About my intention to court you.”

You giggled at his pained face and he relaxed a little, looking down at you with fondness in his eyes. You wondered when that had begun. You wished you’d been paying attention enough to notice.

“What now?” he asked. “How do your human courtships go? I will do what I must.”

You thought about it, amusement flickering through you at the thought of Drakar trying to uphold the proper etiquette required while courting a princess. But the courting process was long and strained and if you were being honest, you preferred the brutal honesty you’d been given here at camp. “Frankly, I��ve had just about enough of how humans do it. What about you? We can skip the dead animal bit, but what comes next?”

He looked you up and down, some gears turning in his head that you were not privy to.

“I will have to be gentle,” he said, before hauling you over his shoulder and bringing you over to his bed of furs on the floor.

Your eyes widened as the implication set in. You’d been far from the perfect princess, having your fair share of trysts with guards and servants over the years, but this was a different beast.

And then he kissed you and you stopped thinking altogether.

It was desperate and urgent, his lips figuring out how to move against your smaller ones and you reached up, pulling his face closer as he set you below him on his makeshift bed.

He ground down on you, clothed hips moving to meet yours. Your disparate sizes meant to do so while kissing you he was contorted at a strange angle but he certainly wasn’t complaining.

He stopped kissing you, rushing to pull off his off pants, and his cock slapped against your stomach, thick and hard and hot and you wanted him inside you now.

But when it fell against you, it hit just above your belly button and you thought that perhaps your eyes were a bit bigger than your stomach.

He seemed to realize the impracticality of it at the same time you did, a hearty laugh escaping him. “Don't worry, princess, I'll get you nice and stretched out.”

You chuckled nervously. “I don’t know if stretching will be enough.”

He slid down, hitching your shirt up and pressing a gentle kiss on your stomach. “I won’t hurt you. If you’re not ready, that’s fine. There are other things we can do.”

He shifted both of you with ease, pulling you to sit on his chest as he laid back on his bed. You looked down at him, brows furrowed. “What about your traditional orc courtship.”

That pulled another laugh from him. “What part of this do you think has been traditional? The closest we got to traditional was when you bit me.”

You flushed red, recontextualizing the memory and wondering how many of the things you’d been doing to anger him had also been part of traditional orc courtship.

While you were busy blushing, he’d set to work on your pants, wrestling them off of you as he easily manhandled you. You barely helped, halfheartedly kicking them off. You remembered how much you hated being picked up by him when this had begun and how much that had changed. You were loathe to admit it but every time he lifted and moved you so easily, something stirred inside you.

As soon as he got your pants off you were pulled roughly forward, his hands wrapping around your thighs as he pulled you onto his mouth.

He ate you out with just as much urgency as he kissed you with, wasting no time before sliding his tongue through your folds.

His grip was unforgiving, pulling you down so all of your weight was on him.

His tusks dug into your inner thighs and he seemed to pull you impossibly closer as his tongue thrusted up inside of you.

Even his tongue was almost too thick, you walls stretching to accommodate it. You hands grasped at his hair, needing something to hold onto.

His mouth locked over your clit, sucking hard before moving back to thrust inside of you again, hands rising to play with your sensitive bud of nerves as he did.

As you began to fall apart above him, writhing against the onslaught of sensation, he only doubled his efforts.

You arched your back, your thighs clamping down on either side of his head, hips shifting with the waves of your orgasm that suddenly overcame you. He was content to let you ride it out, grip loosening to let you have your control as you moans filled the tent.

You came down slowly and it took a few moments to realize you were still sitting on his face.

You moved to sit beside him on the furs as soon as you did, your face warming.

You shifted your head to rest against him, staring down at his cock as you did. It was impossibly hard and practically pulsing with need, and you made a decision you hoped you wouldn’t regret.

“You know, it can’t hurt to try.”

He sat up immediately, eagerness evident in his face. “You’ll stop me if it’s too much.” It wasn’t a question but a statement.

You gave him a knowing look. “Of course I will.”

He shifted you, lifting you over him and you were happy to give over control. You trusted him.

It felt even bigger pressed up against your entrance than it had on your stomach and you took a deep breath. You waited but as nothing happened, you realized that Drakar was waiting for your signal.

No nodded and he began to lower you, incredibly slowly. As it pushed inside, you knew the girth was more than anything you’d taken before, but it was manageable. The stretch bordered on painful but it was slow and careful enough that you had time to adjust.

And then, as it went further and further, it became too much,

You winced long before he’d bottomed out, about half of it inside you. It was bordering on too painful and you pressed your hands against his chest, shaking your head. “No more,” you said quietly, already weak from your last orgasm.

He didn’t seem to mind, holding you steady as he pressed you close to him, muttering quiet praises to you.

You slowly adjusted, not ready to take more but more than happy with what was already inside of you.

You shifted your hips a little, pushing it against a perfect spot inside of you, letting out a quiet moan as you did.

He put a stop to it fairly quickly, holding you still. “I think I’ll just keep you there. You’re perfect, taking me so well.”

You writhed, trying to get the stimulation you were becoming desperate for but he held you steady easily.

So you tried a new tactic. “Want more,” you said, voice soft and sweet. If that didn’t work you’d try yelling at him, see how that fared.

“Careful, I promised I wouldn’t hurt you. You damn humans, so fragile.”

“I’m not fragile, you’re just too big.”

“Excuses, excuses.” Despite his words, he began to slowly move, shifting out of you before pushing in again, careful to not push past the point where you’d stopped him.

He moved you up and down like it was nothing, careful even as he began to speed up, hips shifting a little to meet you, chasing after your warm cunt as he pulled you back up.

His breathing grew shaky as he did and despite feeling overwhelmed with sensation, you fought to keep your eyes open, to watch him come undone.

As his grunts became more and more unruly, your walls clenched around him at the sight.

He immediately pulled you up, leaving just the head of his cock inside of you as he filled you with thick ropes of come.

His breathing was ragged and his grip on you tightened slightly, pulling you even closer to him.

He looked down at you, eyes softer than you’d ever seen them, before pulling you off of him and settling back with you resting on his chest.

You made an absolute mess of him as he did, with no chance of keeping the frankly absurd amount of come inside of you.

He didn’t seem to care at all.

“We’re making a mess,” you said, despite suspecting the objection would fall on uncaring ears.

“You said you wanted an orcish courting, the mess is traditional.”

You weren’t sure if you were cut out for a traditional orc courting, already squirming as your thighs were coated in his spend.

But his chest was warm and his breathing steady and you couldn’t help but settle into the comfort of it.

“I'm gonna fit all of it someday,” you said, meaning it fully.

He laughed. “Brave little thing, aren’t you? Dreaming big.”

You snorted.

“What happens now?” you asked as you snuggled further into him.

“You reject that fool's advances.”

You hummed happily. “I will. I guess I’m lucky I caught your eye, don’t know if I would've survived this if I hadn’t”

“I meant what I said. I wouldn’t have let them kill you. It wouldn't be right. And you would’ve managed even without me. You wouldn't be the first human to sneak away to our side.”

That surprised you. “I wouldn't?”

He chucked, hands running through your hair. “You wouldn't. We're a more accepting group, I've found. Although you are a weak little species, we don’t have much use for you. You’re lucky you're pretty or I don't know if we'd put up with you.”

You scrunched up your nose. “You didn’t decide to court me because you thought I was pretty though.”

“No,” he said, like you both already knew the answer. “I decided to court you because no matter how many times we stopped you, you never stopped trying to run, to fight.”

You sat up with a sudden urgency. “If I said I wanted to go home, to my father, would you let me?”

You watched the panic flash across his face and some selfish part of you hoped it was panic over losing you and not panic over the consequences that could come if you showed up alive after his order to kill you.

He sat with it for a while and you let him, in no rush to pull an answer from him.

Finally, he seemed to find whatever he'd been searching for. “I would.”

“Good,” you said, a smug feeling welling up in your chest, right beside the warmth that had begun to fill you at his answer. “Then I'll stay.”

He tried and failed to hide his smile. “Good. Does that mean you’re done running from me?”

You grinned, knowing full well it didn’t. What would be the fun in that? “We’ll see.”

“I’m sure,” he said as he shifted the two of you, wrapping you up in furs to protect your modesty before picking you up once more, with one arm under your knees and the other below your back, keeping you close to his chest. “Now, let’s get you cleaned up, princess.”

#orc x reader #orc #terato #monster bf #monster x human #monster boyfriend #monster x reader #orc boyfriend #orc romance #Bridal carries are also called princess carries and I think it’s so cute that that’s how he picks her up at the end #This wasn’t even the prompt that won the orc poll lol #This is not a democracy apparently

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churipu · 5 months

Text

jjk men & their sleepyhead gf !

featuring. gojo satoru, sukuna ryomen, nanami kento x fem! reader

warnings. none, just them being all soft and whipped for you

note. first of all, anon i am so sorry, i accidentally posted your request on the queue list and fml, i'm so embarrassed but idek how to edit the queue list so out of desperation i deleted it— but i ofc screenshotted this before i deleted the og post, so i am so sorry :(( i hope you enjoy this, and i hope you get to find out i didn't delete your ask and it's here in a form of a screenshot :((

GOJO SATORU. i feel like he doesn't mind most of the time— he does mind it if you fall asleep when you're supposed to be paying attention to him >:(

but whenever you fall asleep, his camera's always on standby, snapping pictures of you from every angle. whether you look good or bad (you never look bad btw), from up above, from below, from the left, from the right, with 0.5, i can go on.

and when you wake up, you find your phone blowing up with notifications from shoko, geto, and him, especially with the notification "@gojosatoru tagged you in a post" and it's just a slideshow post of you sleeping, a few close up shots, and your face with different instagram filters.

you don't even bother at this point since he's not going to stop, and not gonna lie, you did find it a bit funny. and the comments from shoko and geto made you laugh, so... good luck trying to sleep around him, you'll wake up to a whole album of you sleeping on his account.

"satoru, what the fuck is this filter?" it was a filter that made your face a little distorted, and gojo'd just sitting there innocently, blinking his white lashes up at you.

"you look adorable, princess."

"i don't want to sleep around you anymore."

"no, please sleep— how am i supposed to continue my daily updates of you sleeping?"

mind you, he has 200 posts on instagram and 150 of them are just you sleeping + with the cheesiest captions like "my baby is sleeping, pls tell her to wake up bcs i miss her 🥺🥺🥺"

and shoko is all up in his comments like "wake her up yourself, dumbass she's literally in your house."

SUKUNA RYOMEN. the first time you fell asleep around him was when he went out to get a glass of water, but he didn't think of it as anything and thought you were just tired.

but no— you fall asleep anywhere, whenever and most of the time. he gets pretty frustrated when you both spend time, and in a bit, your head leans onto his shoulders and sukuna checks on you, and you were out like a light.

"y/n?" soft snores.

he clicks his tongue in annoyance but doesn't push you away or get angry, although he finds you cute. sometimes snaps a few pictures to keep, but you don't know about that.

and at times, you wake up all tucked in your bed—your favorite plushie beside you, and sukuna nowhere in sight.

you open your phone and there's a few text messages from him.

[ you fell asleep, so i left ] he didn't leave, he said that to make you feel bad and for not giving him enough attention— he stayed in the same seated position for a few hours before prepping you onto your bed, tucking you in and not forgetting to place a smooch on your forehead.

[ call me when you wake up ]

[ love you ] awww.

he's so in love with you.

NANAMI KENTO. he's such a gentle soul, he won't mind if you fall asleep or is asleep whenever he comes over. in fact, he enjoys it when you fall asleep.

he read somewhere that if someone feels tired or sleepy around a person, it's because they feel safe. so nanami just concludes that his girlfriend feels safe around him, safe enough for her to get sleepy and fall asleep on him.

"kento," you murmur half-asleep, stretching your arms.

"hm?" he hums out, opening his arms for you to fall into — which you did, and he craddled you in his arms, placing his cheek onto your head.

"night night." it wasn't even night time, you just had to say it before you go to sleep, and nanami finds you so cute he couldn't help but to squeeze you a little.

"night night," he replies back, kissing your forehead.

nanami just sits there and continues craddling you in his arms, and if he needs to go, he would put you on your bed (on his bed when it's his house), and writes you a short message why he needed to go and when he will be back.

#jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #fluff #jjk fluff #sukuna ryomen #gojo fluff #gojo satoru #sukuna x reader #female reader #nanami kento #nanami x reader

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sanguineterrain · 7 months

Note

how about Jason with the prompt "text me when you get home"? the one time they forget/fall asleep before sending the text and Jay loses hid mind. rushes over expecting them to be dead but they passed out on the couch as soon as they got home

really superbly SCRUMPTIOUS prompt Aud. I love protective jaybird 🥰‼️ thanks for sending something in 🫶

jason todd x gn!reader. worried protective snuggly jason. no warnings really, ya boy is just paranoid and madly in love with you 💓

request something! I rb all fics to @sanguinelibrary

****

As soon as you get out of your last class of the day, your phone rings.

You answer it, wedging the phone between your ear and shoulder as you fish in your bag for a couple of bills. You're already walking to the train station.

"Hi, snookie bear," you say into the phone, slightly delirious with hunger and sleep deprivation.

Jason snorts on the other end. "That's a new one. Hey, baby. Y'heading home?"

"Indeed I am."

"Need a ride?"

You wait and listen. Eventually, you hear the sounds of hitting and grunting in the background. You roll your eyes—only Jason would be in the middle of a fight and then ask if you need a ride home.

"No, I'm okay. It's not dark yet. Plus you sound busy."

"I'm never too busy for you," he says immediately. "And it's gonna get dark in an hour. Are you sure—"

"Yes, Jay," you say gently. "I'm sure. Don't worry about me. I'm going straight home."

You're already at the station. There's a good amount of people, students and workers alike. The university is in a relatively okay part of town, especially during the day. You're not worried. It's not like you traipse through Crime Alley on your downtime.

"Okay." Jason takes a deep breath. "Just—just be careful. Text me when you get home."

You note the hint of worry in his tone. Maybe this week has been particularly saturated with crime. Jason tends to get a little overbearing about your safety when he's had a tough week. You know he had go down to Blüdhaven and help his brother—with what specifically, you don't know.

Most of the time, you're sure you don't want to know.

"I always do," you say. The train pulls up to the station. "Ooh, train's here! I'll talk to you later. I'm thinking of ordering takeout. Too tired to cook."

"Okay, sweetheart. Be safe. Love you. Lock your door."

You roll your eyes fondly. "Yes, Jay. Love you too. Bye."

You hang up as you step onto the train. You pull your headphones out of your bag and shut your brain off during the ride. By the time you get off the train, you've lost hope that you'll be doing any work tonight. You're absolutely wiped out after three back-to-back classes.

It's still light when you get home. You lock the door after you get in, the habit ingrained into you, and dump your bag onto the couch.

Takeout is a no-go. You're hungry now and about thirty seconds away from passing out on the couch.

You change into your home clothes, eat a granola bar, and call it a day. You'll eat more later.

You turn off your phone to bar any annoying notifications and fall into bed, eyes closing immediately.

****

The sound of your deadbolt being teared off its chain wakes you up. You flinch and jump awake, trying to blink through sleep. Your mouth is dry from how hard you slept, and your eyesight is slightly blurry from the sudden flood of moisture.

Your bedroom door swings open, and suddenly you're pulled into warm, heavily muscled arms. You hug back on instinct; you'd know the feel of your boyfriend anywhere.

"Jay, h—"

"You didn't text," he says, voice shaking. "You said you would. I was—I thought you were—"

You tense, guilt knocking into you.

"Shit. Jason, I'm so sorry. I meant to, I was just so tired..."

Jason pulls back to look at you, hands still on your shoulders. His expression is stern.

"I'm gonna pick you up from now on. When are your late days?"

"Jay, no, GCU is across town. You can't possibly pick me up three days a week. That's too much! What about patrol?"

"Somebody else is out at this time," he says stonily. "Crime Alley can wait an hour while I get you home."

His eyes blaze green, a side effect of the Pit. You can tell he's putting every effort into keeping a lid on the worry and fear and anger over your silence.

"Jason." You cup his face. "Honey, I'm safe. I'm sorry I didn't text you. I'm sorry I worried you. But your adrenaline is spiked right now, Jay. Everything feels magnified. I don't need to be picked up. I was perfectly safe coming home. Okay?"

He shakes his head, holding your wrists. "Anything could've happened. I was so—fuck, baby, I was so scared. I-I checked the station footage and the traffic cams, and I didn't see you after you cut through the park, and I thought—I was sure you'd—"

Jason pulls your arms around his neck and buries his face into your shoulder. He supports you by the backs of your thighs, tugging you into his lap. Then he clings tight.

"Oh, Jay," you murmur, petting his curls. "I'm alright. This end of Gotham isn't so bad. And I know you'd have found me even if something had happened. But nothing did."

"Can't lose you," he chokes out.

"You won't lose me, honey," you say. "You keep me safe."

He trembles in your embrace. You kiss the shell of his ear and continue to pet his hair.

"Let me pick you up tomorrow, at least," he pleads. "We'll get dumplings at that place you like. You barely ate anything when you came home."

"Okay, Jay," you say, because you know he needs that reassurance. He won't relax without it. "That sounds good."

You keep stroking his hair. "Y'wanna order in now?"

"In a minute."

Jason lays you both down on the bed. He throws a leg over yours and pulls you into his chest. It's now that you see just how much tension is locked in his shoulders. He's exhausted.

"Jus' wanna hold you for a bit," he says, lips resting on your shoulder.

He's drowsy, the adrenaline finally ebbing. You close your eyes and snuggle into his arms.

"You can hold me for as long as you want," you say, threading your fingers with his. "I'm not going anywhere."

#jason todd x reader #jason todd x you #jason todd x y/n #jason todd fanfiction #red hood x reader #red hood x you #red hood fanfiction #batman fanfiction #dc fanfiction #inbox #blurb

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suncoved · 8 months

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STOP IT RAFE, YOU'RE BEING MEAN! — RAFE CAMERON

pairing; bestfriend!rafe cameron x fem!reader

summary; rafe has a strict rule that if you ever leave anywhere, you tell him. and when you break that rule, he goes ballistic (bsf!rafe cameron x reader)

warnings ; angst! verbal fighting, angry!rafe, kinda mean rafe, theyre both annoyingly oblivious.. warning this did not turn out how i planned it to be but im also not mad at it, idkkkk

to say you were bored was an understatement.

it was a regular rowdy saturday night in the outerbanks, this nights party being at a random kooks house on the figure eight whose name you couldn't quite remember

you were nursing a forgotten red solo cup of punch in your hand, crowd-watching to pass the time.

it wasn't normal that rafe actually succeeded in convincing you to come to these things. because as much as you liked chatting with spoiled self-absorbed kooks over disgustingly sweet punch, you'd rather stay cuddled up in your fluffy pyjamas and watch sappy romcoms on rafe's couch.

but nevertheless, here you were. dreading every decision you had ever made up to that point as you watched rafe from across the room. a blonde kook girl climbing over him and straddling his hips, sitting on his lap as he smirked.

you knew you really had no right being mad at him because you weren’t dating.

but from the start of your more than 10 year friendship, rafe made it clear that you were and always will be his.

so why didn’t that rule go both ways?

with all the thoughts bouncing around in your head, you failed to hear a certain blonde pouges voice echo around you.

you snapped out of your state, consciousness returning to your mind as a hand was waved repeatedly in your face.

“hey! you there princess?” a smile adorned the boys face, a ratty snapback placed backwards on his blonde hair.

“yeah, jj. right here” you joked, smiling brightly back at him as you brought your cup up to your lips.

“thought we lost you there for a bit princess? what’d you doing standing here all alone?” jj asked, surprised to see your constant kook king shadow nowhere to be seen.

“just people watching, the usual. where’s kie?” you quickly changed the subject, wanting anything to get your mind off of rafe.

“around here somewhere i hope. gonna’ try to round everyone up to we can get outta here. early morning for us cut goers tomorrow, fish to catch and things to steal” you giggled at his joke, earning an even wider grin on his face.

you always liked jj. you thought he was funny, and he was the most loyal person to his friends that you knew. and despite his manic tendencies, you trusted him.

“have a nice night j. drive safe!” you said, watching him wink at you before he disappeared into the crowd.

with jj gone, you were left to your own thoughts agian, which was never a good thing.

you glanced over again at rafe sitting comfortably on the couch on the deck. the light from inside illuminating his face as he leaned over to the table, picking up a small bag of white powder and handing it to a random touran.

you bit your lip as you noticed the same blonde from before clinging to his side, rafe seeming unbothered but making no move to push her off.

god, you couldn’t even imagine how rafe would react if he saw you speaking to jj earlier. so why is it that he can literally let a girl dry hump him in the middle of a party and you shouldn’t care?

you didn’t know why you cared though, because rafe is you best friend, nothing more.

right?

you didn’t have time to think about that right now though, you just needed to get the fuck out of this party right now or you were gonna explode.

an idea clicked in your brain and jj dragged a drunk john b towards the entrance of the house, kiara and pope following quickly behind.

you decided that this was now or never, placing your red solo cup onto a random table as you walked towards them.

“hey jj!” you called out, his head immediately snapping towards you. “you think you could give me a ride home?”

it was nearly 30 minutes later that rafe noticed you were no longer in your spot in corner of the house. business was coming to a halt as he sold his last few grams of cocaine, a heavy wad of cash safely resting in his back pocket.

his eyes scanned the crowd for your face, but you were no where to be seen.

and rafe was starting to freak the fuck out.

he knew you wouldn’t go upstairs to any bedrooms, or go out for an impulse swim in the pool. and he knew most of all that you wouldn’t just leave without telling him, and the notification box in his voice remained empty from your contact.

he ran his hand roughly through his hair, pulling aggressively at the roots and cussing to himself frustrated.

his eyes widened as he saw your friend in the crowd, interrupting what ever useless conversation she was having, because until he knew you were safe, nothing was more important.

he asked rudely where you were, watching as her face morphed into shock that rafe was talking to her. because well, if it’s not plotting on the pouges or selling drugs, rafe doesn’t interact with anyone but you or his friends.

“i-i im not sure. i saw her leave like a bit less than half an hour ago. i thought she told you, she always does”

rafe clenched his jaw, hundreds and thousands of thoughts running through his head. “was she alone?”

“n-no. she was with that jj guy and his friends” your friend murmured, nervous she was ratting you out to the scariest guy in the whole of kildare.

it was safe to say that rafe was fucking pissed.

it took him less than a few seconds to put his keys into the ignition of his jeep and drive illegally fast to your house. you liked to piss him off often when you were in a mood, but never with your safety.

rafe never fucked with your safety, ever.

he murmured venomous cusses to himself and he walked towards your house, the pebbles from your mothers perfect drive way crunching under his feet as he speed to your door.

he made a beeline to the entrance of your home, the white arches welcoming and the doorway dimly lit by the porch lights.

he planted his feet straight on the 'welcome home' door mat, lifting his balled fist up to the door and sending booming knocks to the wood panel.

his knuckles were white as he clenched his fists so hard together there was sure to be crimson-red crescent indents from his fingernails. he was fuming.

the click of the lock releasing from the door snapped him out of his thoughts, the door handle turning and the lobby of the inside of your house quickly coming into view.

he locked eyes with your figure immediately, a pink fluffy towel in your hand as you dried your hair. you were only wearing a pair of long socks and rafes shirt which reached more than halfway down your thighs, your face bare of makeup.

you jumped as you saw the look on his face, an anger prevalent in his stare that you had never seen directed at you. fuck. you were in some deep shit.

you parted your lips to speak, but nothing seemed to come out. for the first time in your life, you were scared of rafe. not that he was going to harm you physically, no, never that.

but you knew how much he cared about you and your safety. you just wished he cared that much about your feelings. you wanted him to see that.

"rafe" you said, your voice coming out as a whisper as you watch the lines on his forehead crease together as thousands of thoughts ran through his head.

"what the fuck were you thinking?" he spat as he pushed you as softly as he could into the house so he could close the door, worried the cold of the night was going to make you shiver.

you didn't have time to answer before he started again, running a hand roughly through his hair as he huffed. "you just left? you fucking left a party at night without even texting me, and you let that fucking pouge drive you home!"

you rolled your eyes at the last statement, this was all about jj? "so that's all you care about? me going home with a boy i've known since third grade who just so happens to live on the cut? you don't give a shit about me, you just care about this stupid kook pouge rivalry!"

"don't say what you know isn't true ma. you know i care about you more than i care about myself." he stated, nearly all the anger in him draining out as he saw your eyes begin to fill with tears. he couldn't handle seeing you cry.

"how do i know you care about me rafe? because you don't seem to show it." you sighed pushing yourself as far away from him as you could, your back pushing up against the wall.

"don't fucking say to me y/n. i've loved you from the moment i met you." you finally stopped looking at the floor, lifting your chin so you made eye contact with him.

"stop it rafe, you're being mean" you whispered, mostly to yourself more than rafe. you couldn't listen to him say how much he loved and cared about you for one more second. not when you still had the picture of him being essentially dry-humped in the middle of a party by a girl you didn't even know.

"ma i love you. you know that. you're my world, my favourite girl. why are you fighting this?" rafe said, trying to hold you wrist in his hand before you quickly pulled it away.

"bec-because you can't just say all this then turn around and have make outs with other girls right in front of me. it-its not fair." you spoke, the tears finally making their way down your cheeks in steady streams.

rafe physically flinched at your statement, his palms getting sweaty and his heart rate increasing into rapid beats. was he actually going to admit his love for you right now, like this?

"what are you saying y/n?" he asked, his voice cracking as his face fell. his mind racing with how many outcomes could come out of this conversation.

"that i love you, you idiot!"

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron drabble #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron fluff #rafe cameron angst

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screampied · 2 months

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“. . do you . . know what happens after death, sweetheart?”

the words that slipped out of nanami’s lips struck you right in the very depths of your heart.

it stung—a sharp prod that made the very crevices of your mouth twitch. his hands, his once warm and loving hands started to grow abnormally cold. frigid to where you even started to adapt to his chilled temperature.

“no why….” you started, feeling your throat tighten. “why are you asking me that, kento?” you sniffle, tightly interlocking your fingers with his.

he stares at you with a warm smile spreading across his lips.

regardless of his current position, peacefully resting his back against the ground—his inevitable fate had finally caught up to him.

nanami’s breathing patterns changed significantly. everything was so loud, all he could make out through his peripherals was splotches of blur and your pretty worried face. “. . because,” he continues, and his speech was so slow. you could tell he was trying to get every word out, every syllable, every vowel. just for you and only you. “i’m about to find out, my love . .”

your irises focused on him. nothing else, no one else—just him.

you’ve never seen him like this. so pale, so weak, so . . . scared.

his pure emotion, it showed in his eyes. his perfect brown eyes that you never failed to get lost in. for the first time in what was probably forever, nanami felt…scared. he tried his best to conceal it in front of you though. but even his best wasn’t enough, because you probably knew him better than you knew yourself.

“don’t say things like that, kento,” you mutter, already feeling that annoying plump knot rise up in your throat. your breath was shaky, tremble after tremble. “you’re fine. you can get up. we can get up.”

he knew when you said we, you implied that you’d both be walking away together — hand in hand, like in those stupid cheesy movies you’d watch with him every sunday after he gets off work. but alas, reality was quite harsh to face. an even more incredible tough pill to swallow. nanami knew he wasn’t going anywhere.

it was irksome, you had to squeeze your eyes shut to prevent a single tear to roll down your cheek.

nanami’s eyelids were hanging on by a thread, just barely open. he was trying—trying so hard to hang on, a small pout curls against his lips before he huffs out a single breath.

“ah . . forgive me, you’re right,” he says, his thumb swiftly stroking the front of your hand. a single tear escapes past your lower damp eyelid. even his voice sounded different. a voice you grew to love, so sweet and protective. it now sounded incredibly tired. you could hear a slight wheeze between breaths of his. “hey, don’t cry. don’t do that, look at me.”

his voice was so soft, you sniffled—despising the irritating tears that started to run down both sides of your temples. if it was anything nanami couldn’t stand, it was that he couldn’t stand to see the love of his life shed such sweet pitiful tears for him.

you looked at him, watching his eyelids struggle to stay open for you. everything ached, his body didn’t even feel like his own anymore. it was an indescribable feeling from when he got struck, laying against the slick cold floor of the shibuya train station.

“. . d-don’t leave me,” was all you managed to say, your lips was trembling, your heart pounded and you didn’t wanna say goodbye just yet. “kento, i need you.”

“hm? what are you mumblin’ about, sweetheart? ‘m right here.” his voice, it sounded happier.

you furrowed your eyebrows, now finding yourself buried into nanami’s bare chest, damp chin pressing against his pecs and all.

you were here safe and sound, snuggled up all against him, as you should be. it took you a long while to calm down, he’s staring at you with a soft loving gaze—a brief look of concern before you mumble out a, “..kento? are you okay?”

“why wouldn’t i be, baby?” nanami hums, a soft thumb stroking your back. with a relaxed breath, he leans in to plant a gentle kiss near the very tip of your forehead. his touch was forevermore soothing, a touch you never wanted to forget.

you let off a jittery sigh of relief, finally coming to the conclusion that it was another one of your horrid nightmares. you had nothing to worry about.

he was fine.

you were fine,

everything was fine.

. . is what you kept telling yourself.

nanami never told you those words, he didn’t kiss the tip of your forehead or stroke your back lovingly whilst staring into your eyes. the only true unbearable truth was that nanami was gone.

he was gone, and his last words weren’t even “i love you,” or “i’m sorry.” on his fatal dying breaths, nanami’s last words to you while squeezing your hand, sliding a ring into your palm, he rasps out a breathy, “will . . you marry me?”

but before you could tell him yes, he was already gone.

#★vegasbaby.#nanami x reader #nanami kento x reader #nanami x you #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jjk angst #jujutsu kaisen angst #jjk fic #jjk drabbles

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quin-ns · 1 year

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Sleeping Bag (Joel Miller x Reader)

Word count: 1.7K

Summary: you can’t get comfortable in your sleeping bag, so joel invites you into his

Tags: age gap (mostly implied), anxiety, fluff, protective/caring!joel, comfort, cuddling, sharing a sleeping bag (instead of the one bed trope lol), kissing (forehead and lips), it’s just cute short and fun

A/N: simple and quick, inspired by ep 4 when joel and ellie were in sleeping bags in the woods, but no explicit spoilers. I’ve been wanting to write for joel since episode one and finally got an idea. pretty sure more will be coming soon…

Cross-posted to ao3 • tlou masterlist • writing masterlist

After sleeping in a bed in the QZ’s for years, suddenly trying to get comfortable in a sleeping bag on the ground was proving difficult for you.

What a spoiled thought to have, right? Well, it wasn’t just that. You were out in the open woods. There could be infected anywhere. They could come for you any second. How could you close your eyes and rest peacefully knowing you were no longer behind the barrier walls?

Ellie was already asleep, you could hear her light snores. Your back was facing him, but you assumed Joel was asleep as well given his stillness. You rolled from your side to your back and sighed.

You had to sleep. You should’ve been tired. You and Joel had taken turns driving, although since you didn’t have much driving experience Joel became concerned when you began to struggle with the gear shift and mixed up the pedals (it only happened once but he couldn’t let it go). Joel had grown exhausted and didn’t want to stress you out by making you drive without him as backup/support, so you all stopped for the night. He was thoughtful like that; even if he was a bit grouchy sometimes.

You turned from your back to your other side, eyes landing on Joel. He was facing you, eyes closed, breathing steadily. The older man actually seemed to be at peace. He only looked like that when he was asleep. The moment he woke up, you knew he’d have that slight pout and furrow of his brows that you’d become accustomed to.

If Joel caught you staring, you wondered what he’d say. You could never pinpoint the way he viewed you. Friend? Daughter? Burden? You’d be way more okay with the previous two as long as it wasn’t the third. Although if you were being honest with yourself, you hoped it was none of the above.

Despite his age and his tough nature, you had a thing for Joel. Like, a thing. Feelings, attraction, affection—whatever you wanted to call it. Definitely a crush. Love? Maybe. It was a little bit confusing, but nothing in this life was simple.

Joel had taken you under his wing a while back and looked after you. He was incredibly protective and even if he wasn’t the best with expressing himself, Joel cared for you. He made you feel safe. He was there for you when you had no one else.

You rolled to your other side. Then back. Simply put, tossing and turning. The thought that you were being loud don’t even cross your mind until—

“What are you doing?” Joel’s voice caught your attention.

You let out a sigh, feeling bad that you’d woken the man up. You turned back to face him. “I can’t sleep,” you confessed.

“I can tell,” he murmured. “Do you plan on rolling around all night?”

You frowned to yourself. “I'm sorry.”

Joel exhaled softly and even in the dark, you could see the sympathy in those deep brown eyes of his. You hadn’t realized that subconsciously, you’d moved closer to him.

“It’s okay.” He had a soft spot for you, even though he’d probably deny it.

“I’ll try and be… still, I guess.” You knew you weren’t going to be able to sleep. “Just go back to sleep, I’ll be fine.” That was a lie.

“No,” he decided after a moment. You furrowed your brows. “You need sleep too.”

“I can’t get comfortable,” you replied. You let a few seconds pass before adding, “…and I’m too anxious.”

“I’m not gonna let anything happen to you,” Joel promised like if there was one thing he was sure about, it was that.

It meant a lot, it really did. But you huffed out a humorless laugh and went to a worse case scenario. “You’re all the way over there. If an infected wanted to get me, it could. Before you could stop it.”

Joel was quiet for a few beats. You hadn’t meant to insult him, but it was true. It didn’t matter how safe you felt with him there. They were faster than him. Faster than anyone.

“So then come over here,” Joel offered, voice still thick with sleep. It sounded incredibly enticing.

The image of you crawling into his sleeping bag crossed your mind faster than you could stop it. You had to do a double take. “Like… scoot over there?” you tried to clarify inconspicuously.

“If you’re against sharing with me.”

So, he had meant what you’d hoped for. Your heart skipped a little beat and you swallowed.

“I’m not.”

All Joel did was hum. You unzipped your sleeping bag and left the warmth. Joel was ready and waiting when you moved over to him, enveloping you into the safety of his sleeping bag and heavy arms. You wiggled around a little bit until you got comfortable. For the first time since you’d left the QZ, it didn’t take long.

“Thank you,” you mumbled softly, trying to keep your breathing calm. Being so close to Joel was causing you to become less focused on sleep and more focused on the way his breath sounded so close to your ear.

“Mmhhmm,” he hummed from deep in his throat with closed lips. You thought it was going to be left at that, but then you heard his gruff voice. “I know it’s been hard on you.” You opened your mouth to deny it, but he continued. “Even if you’re too stubborn to admit it beyond makin’ snarky comments.”

You took in a breath. He got you on that one, and you both knew it. “Since when do you know me this well?”

“Since always,” Joel pointed out. “You’re easy to read.”

“For you maybe.”

“Yeah, for me,” he agreed, sounding pleased with himself. Joel was silent for a long moment, listening to the soft rustle of your body as you gazed around your surroundings. The grass, the trees, the darkness… “I’m sorry for being so selfish.”

The sudden apology confused you. “What?”

“You’ve never been outside of the QZ before, and for good reason,” Joel started. “It’s a scary world out here and I shouldn’t have subjected you to it. I shouldn’t have brought you along.”

His voice was full of guilt that seemed to come out of nowhere, but given all he had to say you suspected he’d been carrying it since you left.

“I wanted to come with you,” you assured him. You never second guessed that decision despite everything that had happened so far. “Where is this coming from?”

“You’re scared and it’s my fault.” You could hear the deep frown in his voice.

“You’re the reason I feel safe right now,” you said without a second thought. It was true. You wanted him to know that. There was something you wanted to know too, now, and you couldn’t help but ask. “Do you not want me here?”

“I do,” Joel confessed. “That’s why I’m selfish.” There was a pause but you didn’t dare speak. “I didn’t want to be away from you.”

A wave of realization crashed over you.

You wiggled around, turning until you were facing him. You offered him a soft, delicate smile that you hoped he could see despite the dark.

“It almost sounds like you care about me. A lot,” you couldn’t help but tease.

“You know I care about you,” Joel stated, like it was the most obvious thing. Maybe he’d tried to cover it up in the past, but someone would have to be blind to not see that you meant something to Joel.

“I care about you too,” you admitted with much more ease. He knew, though.

Joel, in an uncharacteristically soft gesture, pressed a kiss to your forehead. You could hardly believe it. But it felt nice. You liked the affection. And coming from someone like Joel who never let their guard down, it was significant enough to leave you speechless.

“It’s gonna be daylight soon,” he muttered. “You should try and get some sleep.”

“Yeah, okay,” you agreed with a slight nod. “Just… one more thing.” It took everything you had to be brave enough to say that, and to do what you were going to do next.

There was basically no space between the two of you, but you managed to bring your hand up to Joel’s face and cup his jaw. You leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips.

Joel didn’t hesitate to kiss you back. He took charge, but it wasn’t surprising. He had a dominating presence and was rough around the edges, you didn’t think he’d be delicate with you.

Not that you minded.

His lips moved against yours, almost in a frenzy. Like he was scared you’d slip away from him. It was so needy, so passionate. You wished you would’ve done this much, much sooner

Joel found the willpower to break away from the kiss before you. You would’ve happily lost consciousness in order to kiss him for just a few more moments. But then you’d worry him, and you hated to see Joel worry.

But you didn’t see worry when you looked into his eyes. You saw a hint of wonder. You were both staring into a new beginning as you gazed upon one another. He was panting a little, both of your soft breaths intertwining.

“You need sleep,” he reminded you.

Of course he still couldn’t drop the protector role. He wasn’t wrong about that, either. You smiled to yourself, the feel of his lips still ghosting yours despite the distance. You twisted in the sleeping bag without a word, knowing that you’d never be able to sleep facing Joel. You’d probably be too busy staring at him…

So yeah, you laid with your back to his chest and closed your eyes. His arms held you tight against his firm body. Not only providing warmth, but security as well.

“Goodnight,” Joel mumbled to you, already dozing back off. You could hear the soft smile in his voice despite the tiredness. It seemed easier for him to sleep wherever, although you liked to think you were bringing him some kind of comfort as well. With the way he held you against him it wouldn’t be an unrealistic thought.

“Goodnight, Joel,” you replied softly, finally able to relax your breathing. The feel of Joel’s body pressed against you, his strong arms around you—it felt like a dream. Safe and sound, away from the dangers that lie not far off. And soon enough, you were finally able to close your eyes and fall into a peaceful sleep.

#quin-ns writing #joel miller x reader #joel miller #the last of us #pedro pascal #the last of us fanfiction #joel miller x you #joel x reader #the last of us spoilers #joel miller x y/n #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #ellie williams

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