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etherealising · 11 months

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chapter one | a berzatto family christmas

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pairing(s): carmen berzatto x fem!reader : platonic!michael berzatto x fem!reader : platonic!richie jerimovich x fem!reader

summary: you reunite with carmy years later at the berzatto family christmas party.

warnings: language (cursing), blasphemy, angst (maybe?), spoilers kinda (if you haven't seen season 2 don't read), the berzatto family, not dialogue heavy, very subtle hints to mikey being suicidal, probably ooc!characters, idk what else but if you find something let me know please! not beta’d and minimal editing so sorry for any mistakes. i also wrote this overstimulated on caffeine so if it doesn’t make sense or it’s repetitive then we know why : )

semantics: no use of Y/N: reader goes by the nickname Baby it has a backstory and its literally so simple, if this bothers you idk what to tell you, sorry : (

wc: 4.7k

You were standing on the sidewalk, nerves filling your body as you hyped yourself up to take the few steps left to the porch and ring the doorbell. You shouldn’t have been so nervous, you knew that but your mind was spinning with the myriad of scenarios both good and bad; that could play out once you stepped foot past the threshold. In all honesty, it wasn’t so much that you were nervous to enter the house itself, it was the fact that you’d be face to face with your childhood best friend for the first time in you didn’t even know how long. Maybe childhood best friend was a stretch you had only been introduced into each other's lives due to circumstance, and because of that forced proximity, you both took comfort in having someone stable around.

The two of you weren’t friends because you had chosen each other, or because you had met in kindergarten and shared toys in the sandbox because the other kids were stingy. No, you met because as a single mom, your mother needed all the shifts she could get even if that meant working the graveyard shift at the hospital, and only seeing you a handful of hours throughout the day because most times she was too dead on her feet to be conscious for more than a few hours. And when she could no longer pay the babysitter her next best option was the eccentric woman across the street who had children close in age with you.

Enter Donna Berzatto, a woman who came to feel like a second mom to you. It's not that she replaced your mom, no one could ever replace her, but she was the only real mother figure you knew for a time in your life. Who took you in as her own when your mother needed a new babysitter, and not just you but integrated your mom into the family as well, when she was spared the time off from nursing. Donna Berzatto who never sent you home empty-handed, and always made enough food for you and your mom to last throughout the week, just so your mother wouldn’t have to worry about fitting grocery shopping into her already hectic schedule. Donna Berzatto who, even when you were old enough to no longer need a babysitter, would send Carmy across the street to fetch you for family dinner, or even just invite you over because she thought you needed company.

Now that you were thinking about it, it seemed like you were more friends with his mom than you ever were with Carmen Berzatto. But then that would be a lie wouldn’t it?

You and Carmen Berzatto were friends due to circumstance, maybe even best friends. You weren’t just friends at his house, but you were school friends, you were everywhere friends. He really was your only true friend, of course, you had school friends, but that’s just what they were. You saw them Monday through Friday for a mandatory education, never an hour before school started or a minute after the final bell. Which didn’t necessarily bother you, but sometimes you longed for a weekend invitation to hang out, not that it ever came. And it wasn’t like you were shunned or unpopular in school, you were just average, you didn’t see a point in making friends with people you weren’t actually interested in befriending.

That’s what made Carmy so different, yes maybe you were only introduced due to circumstances but that didn’t stop the two of you from latching onto each other for dear life. Your mom always wondered how you two even established the friendship you did, with both of you being shy and never feeling the need to go out of your way to make friends. Include the fact that you had been neighbors practically your whole lives and never once taken an interest in each other aside from shy waves and curious childlike staring when either of you would be outside.

Your relationship with Carmen progressed as any childlike relationship would, you befriended each other, had your incessant petty arguments and fights, nothing ever serious enough to actually cause damage just childish antics. And it continued to progress through middle school and high school, the two of you were each other’s person, you just understood each other, the two of you let the other understand you, and wanted to be understood by each other.

You could also recall what you explain as a minute change in your friendship. As Senior year approached and you and Carmy continued to grow into yourselves, you developed a slight crush on the boy you had grown up with. It obviously wasn’t as small as you thought it was if you were standing in front of his childhood home giving yourself a pep talk just to ring the damn doorbell though was it?

The unsolicited card and wrapped present weighed heavy in your tote bag, as your breath was made visible by the chilly Chicago weather.

It was Christmas and for all intents and purposes you had been planning on mailing the present to Carmen’s New York address, but after visiting The Beef on your way back into town Mikey and Richie had let it slip that indeed the infamous Berzatto sibling would be gracing everyone with his presence this holiday season.

It was moments like these you wished you had picked up on the Berzatto family’s horrible smoking habit, thankfully your mom had taught you just how vital having functioning lungs was.

Your head shot up as the sound of loud rambunctious voices drew your attention to the front door opening and closing revealing a face you were all too familiar with and actually relieved to see. The oldest Berzatto brother stood on the porch, hands on his hips as he gave you a goofy smile. You could feel your lips stretching into a smile of your own, the infectious aura that Michael Berzatto exuded doing wonders to calm your racing mind.

“I know you didn’t come all this way just to stand outside staring at my family home like a fucking weirdo Baby.” Mikey’s smile grew in size as he teased you.

You rolled your eyes at the childhood nickname you wish hadn’t stuck as Mikey opened his arms to wrap you in one of his signature hugs. The two of you stood on the porch embracing each other for what felt like hours, you needed this hug as much as he needed it, you knew it and Mikey did too. That was the thing about you and Mikey although not blood-related it was as if your souls knew each other in a past life. Of the Berzatto siblings, Mikey was the last sibling you developed a relationship with. Growing up he was always just Carmy’s older brother but as you grew up surrounded by him, he became your surrogate older brother as well. And when Carmy dashed off to pursue his culinary dreams in New York, you and Mikey grew even closer.

You stepped back from the embrace, your eyes finding Mikey’s as he looked at you with a knowing glint in his eyes. “You not standing out here cause of a certain Chef in that house are ya?” Mikey asked, smirking down at you.

You chuckled “The only reason I come around anymore is for Mama Donna.” You joked doing a poor job to convince Mikey.

He nodded, tossing his head back with a laugh, “You were always a shit liar Baby. Carmy’s an idiot, don't let him ruin your Christmas.”

You let out a sigh head resting against Mikey’s chest as you tried to let his words soothe you even more, “He’s not ruining it, you just know things have been kind of stilted between us, and I don’t know this whole situation just feels awkward.”

You raised your head to look at Mikey again, “It’s awkward right? Am I making things awkward? I don’t wanna ruin Christmas Mikey, I know how your mom is and I know how Carmy is, I don’t wanna ambush him.”

The worry in your voice was evident as Mikey stood there listening to your ranting. His hand reached out as he used his thumb to massage away the frown between your eyebrows. “Calm down Baby, you know Ma is expecting you, and she wouldn’t take it well if you missed Christmas. She looks forward to seeing you every year, you give her a piece of Carmy when he can’t be fucking asked to come home and visit.” His hand moved down to cup the side of your neck rubbing soothing circles where his thumb rested, “Do it for Ma okay? Let Carmy be fucking wonder boy Carmy a’ight.”

You laughed nodding your head as best as you could with Mikey’s hand holding it, he smiled giving you one last hug before dropping his hand to grab your wrist and tug you into the house. You stopped him by placing a hand on his arm that was connected to yours.

“Hold on Mikey, I got you something.” You moved to start rummaging through your tote bag stalling because you were too nervous for his reaction to the present.

“Awe you didn’t have to get me nothing.” You turned back to him with the present in your hands as he held his own hands over his heart mockingly. You knew Mikey didn’t do well when it came to sentimental things and the best you would get out of him was a joke as opposed to anything else.

You laughed holding the rectangular wrapped present out to him, “I wanted to Mikey, don’t think of this as a gift, think of it uhh…as a show of appreciation yeah?” You nodded feeling your face heat up as you dropped your head so he couldn’t see how unsure you were about the gift.

He smiled, finding your shyness endearing before tearing into the neatly wrapped paper and revealing a frame, his hands engulfing it from end to end. He smiled looking at it before you saw confusion etch across his face, “This is great Baby, yeah but uh what the fuck am I looking at?”

You shove his shoulder before laughing at him and grabbing the frame out of his hands but holding it in front of your chest so he could still see its contents, “It's a trademark certification you dumbass, can’t you fucking read Mikey.” You joked to try and underestimate how big of a gift this was.

Mikey’s brows furrowed before he snatched the frame out of your hands to get a better look at the certificate sitting behind the glass, eyes snapping back up to your face with a look you couldn’t read. You shuffled your feet feeling like you overstepped a boundary you didn’t even know was between you and Mikey, “Don’t worry though I-I, put it in your name, it’s not like I trademarked it for myself or anything. I just know how much this means to you and I, I know shit has been tough lately and I’m sorry if you feel like I stepped on your toes but…Mikey, you deserve good things too okay?” You hadn’t meant to go on a rant, but you could feel the apprehension leaving you as you became passionate in every word you spoke.

“You deserve to be fucking happy Mikey, and I, I want you to know I fucking believe in you and I’m always in your corner. If it's-” You were cut off by Mikey clearing his throat, causing your eyes to snap back up to his, all the emotions he didn’t know how to translate into words swirling in his brown eyes, a small smile resting on his lips.

“Mikey-,” Before you could get another word out you were once again trapped in his comforting embrace, this hug conveying something completely different from the earlier one you shared. Mikey’s head tucked into your neck as you felt his uneasy breathing through your hands clutched around him. Mikey wasn’t the type to get emotional in front of other people, and feeling a tear of his smear against your cheek as he raised his head from your neck and settled his bearded cheek against yours, you weren’t sure if you had done the right thing by giving him the gift or not.

The two of you stood in silence as you allowed Mikey his moment, not wanting to make him feel insecure about you being present while he was being emotional. When he finally pulled away you could see the leftover sheen in his eyes. He tucked the framed certificate under his arm as both his hands reached up to grab your face in both of his hands, eyes finding yours, a whispered “thank you, baby,” leaving his lips as he placed a kiss on your forehead before he grabbed the frame again and wrapped you in another hug.

His head rested atop yours as your face rested against his chest, ear pressed against his beating heart. You lied, you thought the last hug was different, but no it was this hug that was different, while the second hug you shared in the span of 20 minutes was a hug of love and gratitude. This hug felt heavier, like there were things Mikey wanted to tell you but couldn’t, things he only felt he could convey through a hug, things you weren’t sure if you wanted to question or not.

It had been almost 20 minutes since Michael had escaped the house to do whatever the fuck it was he was doing outside. Carmy didn’t know and in all honesty he didn’t actually give a shit either, too busy helping Donna out in the kitchen to try to give any thoughts to whatever had grabbed Mikey’s attention.

He was focused in the corner of the kitchen making Tiff Sprite to help alleviate her nausea symptoms. Anyone else would have done their best to block out the rambunctious noises going on throughout the house, not Carmy though, the chaos fueled him, it grounded him. If the house was quiet it would have been too much for him, to be alone with his own thoughts ping-ponging around in his head, waiting for a chance to drown him. So if he had to listen to his mom list a plethora of things he needed to make sure happened for Christmas dinner to go off without a hitch while he was making Sprite from scratch, he welcomed it.

He finished his concoction just in time for Richie to walk through the kitchen, the older man trying to figure out how the fuck it was even possible to make Sprite from scratch. Gratefully taking the glass Carmy had offered to him, marveling at the carbonated drink in his hand.

Carmy nodded in his direction, “Yo Cousin, where the fuck is Mikey. He just fucking disappeared.” Carmy’s head swiveled around the kitchen double checking whether his brother was there or not, coming up empty in his search. Richie glanced up before settling his eyes back on the drink in his hand still doing the mental math to wrap his head around what the fuck Carmy just made.

Richie jutted his head in the direction of the front door, “Outside talking to Baby.” His eyes finally focused on Carmy’s in time to see the frown grace the younger man’s face, his eyebrows pinching together in agitation, annoyed that his brother was on a phone call rather than inside. Though that’s what Carmy told himself subconsciously he knew he was just annoyed at the fact that Mikey was even talking to you at all. Carmy didn’t think he was possessive but as you and Mikey grew closer through the years, he couldn’t help but feel miffed about the ever growing friendship between the two of you. You and your friendship with Carmy was the first thing in his life that he felt like was actually his and his alone.

It’s funny really for Carmy to think he has any sort of claim over you, or like the two of you were even really friends anymore. When he left Chicago to pursue his culinary dreams, he left you behind to, essentially ghosting the one real friend he did have. It’s not like he meant to, you two just went your separate ways after graduation, and he wasn’t even sure if there even was an “Us” when it came to the two of you anymore. If that was the case the only person he had to blame was himself, it was no fault of yours that your friendship had hit a plateau, Carmy hadn’t responded to a text of yours in years, and the fact that you still texted him to this day caused a slight pain in his chest as he stood in the middle of his mother’s kitchen, frown still etched into his features.

“He’s outside on the phone with Baby?” Carmy questioned the ache in his chest doing nothing to alleviate his irritation. It was Richie’s turn to frown reciprocating the same confused look Camry wore.

“What - No dickhead, he’s talking to Baby, like she’s right in fucking front of him and shit.” Richie swatted the side of Carmy’s head like a child. “Your moms invites her to every holiday, Cousin, and she comes every time.” Richie knew the last bit wasn’t necessary but felt Carmy rightfully deserved it, all anyone wanted from the youngest Berzatto was a visit.

“Dudes been out there for fucking ever though, those to idiots just standing outside like a bunch of fucking jackoffs.” Richie left the kitchen not waiting for Carmy to follow him before heading to the front door. He stopped moving the curtain on one of the side windows to spot two of the people he considered family. He let out a low whistle nudging Carmy’s shoulder who had finally joined his side nodding his head to the window.

“Get a load of these fucking losers hugging on the porch like they’re in some fucking Hallmark movie or some shit.” Richie laughed pointing at you and Mikey through the window. Carmy leaned closer to get a peak at what Richie was going on about.

Carmy hated to admit it, but Richie was right, the too of you looked like the happy couple who just saved a small town’s Christmas or whatever the fuck Hallmark movies were about. Mikey had finally separated himself from you long enough for Carmy to take in your features. He’d be lying if he said the years apart made him forget what you looked like. You were still the same girl he left in Chicago all those years ago except the wand of maturity had touched you, and in his opinion he thought you looked more beautiful than you had in high school.

Carmy was never one to pay too much attention to a woman’s features, and not because he didn’t care, it's just that he didn’t think it mattered. But as he drank in your form he learned in that exact moment why a woman might want people to notice the small things. Like the haircut you were sporting that Carmy felt shaped your face well, not that he knew shit about stuff like that, but he could appreciate art when he saw it. The outfit you picked out doing wonders to compliment your tall form and accentuate your legs. Carmy could look at you all day, scratch that he wanted to look at you all day.

He was torn from his reverie as Richie narrated the scene happening in front of them, “Aw look at these fuckers lookin all in love an shit.” He joked watching as Mikey slung his arm around you and led you towards the door, what looked to be a frame held in his other hand. The two of you walked side by side, your arm wrapped around his torso, hugging him into your side, Mikey’s head leaning slightly down to whisper something in your ear a small smile gracing your face as Mikey pressed his lips onto your temple lingering there for what Carmen swore was forever.

The tightness in his chest intensified tenfold as the realization of just how close you and Mikey had become sank into him. He didn’t know how to feel, his brain not even allowing any emotions to process, saving himself from any conclusions he might come to from a split second interaction.

Carmy left, he chose his path, he knew this, and he had no regrets he would pursue his dream every time the opportunity was presented. He just wished that, maybe if he held onto you as tightly as you still held onto him, it would’ve been him greeting you on the sidewalk on Christmas Day, being the sole object of your attention holding you close to his longing body. He knew overall the decisions he made regarding you were wrong, while he ignored your daily text and calls enough times for you to just resort to monthly check ins asking him about his endeavors and congratulations as you heard about his achievements in the culinary industry, he knew deep down that Mikey answered every text and call you sent his way, made it his mission to connect with you anytime you were back in Chicago.

Carmy couldn’t admit it to himself but deep down he knew his family saw spending time with you as a way to stay connected to him. You were the closest thing any of them still had to Carmy, and even though he had essentially cut you off from his life, his family loved you too much to allow Carmy’s shortcomings to affect their relationship with you.

He was broken from the recesses of his mind as Richie threw the door open stepping over the threshold raising his hands in the air to welcome you and Mikey into the house. The glass of Sprite still clutched in his left hand, a broad smile spread across his face as you left Mikey’s hold to greet Richie eyes not having spotted Carmy who was hidden behind Richie’s small frame.

Carmy’s first up close look at you in years were your hands wrapped around Richie’s torso as he pulled you into a hug, rocking the two of you back and forth, Richie let you go quickly turning his body back into the house “A’ight fuckers you can all stop pretending you care so much about Carmy and his little rat in the chef hat bullshit. We got the real deal here now, Baby's gracing us with her journalist presence.”

Carmy’s brows furrowed at Richie’s dig only slightly offended about being compared to a fictional character named after pasta, too caught up in allowing the sound of your laugh to grace his ears for the first time in what felt like forever. Mikey had finally caught up to you standing behind you with a hand placed on your shoulder, Carmy watched as his brother’s hand glided up and down your arm before giving your bicep a slight squeeze and nodding his head in Carmy’s direction.

If Carmy was being honest it was becoming increasingly difficult to quiet his mind that was eagerly trying to piece everything together. From yours and Mikey's prolonged moment on the porch, to the kiss he placed on your temple, add in Richie’s jokes and the almost constant physical contact between you and Mikey and Carmy was sure he figured shit out.

You looked to where Mikey motioned his head finally noticing Carmy’s figure standing there while Richie ran off towards the stairs after his impromptu introduction. Looking at Carmy was like being in a Time Machine, nothing had drastically changed, he looked more exhausted than what you remembered. But overall he was the same Carmy you parted ways with all those years ago.

A small smile graced your lips as you took him in, he was still your Carmy appearance wise, and right now for you that was all that mattered. You lifted your hand in a small wave gaining his attention, your smile growing wider as your eyes locked with his.

The clearing of a throat broke you from your thoughts, Mikey’s hand giving your shoulder a squeeze as he walked you two into the house before shutting the door behind him. As he finished he stood in front of you so that Carmy was partially covered from view by each brother in your line of vision though your focus was taken up by the eldest. He gave you a reassuring smile before gently knocking his fist against your chin and presumably turning to leave you and Carmy alone.

As Mikey walked past Carmy he gave him his signature grin and a wink before patting his shoulder as left to check on Donna in the kitchen and mingle with the other guests.

Carmy’s face was still set in the same frown it had been in when he first asked Richie where Mikey ran off to. You took a deep breath to settle your nerves before taking a step to close the gap between you, your hand reached out to gently squeeze Carmy’s arm though stopping in midair as you watched him subtly flinch. Your smile faltered, your hand finding its rightful place at your side. You looked up to see the apology in Carmy’s eyes, you did your best to brush the moment off, maybe you came on too strong, maybe it wasn’t fair that you were still pushing for a friendship when Carmy had given you all the reasons to stop trying, maybe the Carmy in front of you was a different Carmy to the one you used to know. Maybe the life where it was you and Carmy had finally taken its last breath and you were just too clingy and desperate to realize.

You cleared your throat trying to alleviate the lump forming from the thoughts that were racing through your brain. The small placating smile on your face there to stop you from having a full breakdown in the Berzatto’s foyer. “Its good to see you Carmen, I hope New York is treating you well.” You lips wrapped around the generic greeting forcing yourself not to say anything you might regret.

Carmy nodded his head rapidly accepting your lackluster words, his lips parting and closing all in the same breath. The man obviously had nothing to say to you, and maybe you just had to accept that. You stayed a moment longer cursing yourself for doing so as the air between you two filled with palpable tension.

“Baby, is that you? My goodness you look fucking gorgeous.” Half of Donna’s body had popped out of the kitchen finally gaining a spare moment to greet you. Her words mumbled through the cigarette between her lips, a ladle held in her right hand while the left was occupied by tongs. Her apron covered in all sorts of sauces and whatever the hell else your brain couldn’t even begin to discern.

You laughed half in amusement and half in relief, you weren’t sure how much longer you could stand there as Carmy burned holes in your body. You waved at Donna quickly, beginning to head towards her to join her in the kitchen. It wasn’t your first choice as an escape from Carmen but you’d rather try and help Donna finish preparing Christmas dinner than be around Carmy for another minute.

Donna waved the tongs in Carmy’s direction, “Jesus fucking Christ Carmen, take the girls bag and coat. Don’t just fuckin stand there.” She huffed eyes glaring the longer Carmen stayed glued to the spot. You handed him your tote as soon as his arm shot out and began hastily shimmying out of your jacket. You gave him a soft smile before laying the jacket on his awaiting arm.

You began to leave the foyer as Donna motioned for you to follow her, mentally preparing yourself for what you were about to walk into. A sudden thought occurred causing you to gently grip Carmy’s bicep as you were walking past him, “I uh, I actually bought you a Christmas present. So um, find me later yeah?” You smiled tilting your head slightly in questioning.

Carmen Berzatto graced you with a small smile, nodding back in agreement as you sent him one final nod and turned to enter the kitchen. The first positive emotion he granted you since you walked back into his life 30 minutes ago.

next chapter ↣

a/n: this is my first fic that i’m publishing and i genuinely have no clue what the fuck any of this is, : ) but nonetheless hope you all enjoy! or don’t i’m just a stranger on the internet. constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated though. please like, comment, reblog if this behemoth tickles your fancy!

also i write for fun/hobby and i'm such an inconsistent bitch so don't get your hopes too high, but this will potentially be a series idk yet though lol.

#carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto x you #the bear fic #michael berzatto #richie jerimovich #carmen berzatto #carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto angst #platonic!michael berzatto #all i ever knew only you ₊‧°𐐪♡𐑂°‧₊#[aiekoy] 1

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ms-demeanor · 8 months

Note

i really liked OJST in the mid-2010s but i didn’t stop reading cause of the cuck comic - wasn’t there also a comic erika moen wrote about (functionally) harassing lesbians with her now-husband?

In the mid 2010s closet-keys criticized one of Erika Moen's early diary comics and described Erika Moen as "Reassuring a cishet partner that it’s totally okay to use hate speech towards wlw at Pride" and condoning the harassment and fetishization of lesbians because of a 2007 comic that she had made as part of a webcomic she had written about gender and her interactions with her queerness.

The hate speech in question is the partner asking "are you sure you want to hold my hand with all these dykes around?" while they are pretty clearly at a Dyke Day event during pride, and the reassurance that 'it's totally okay to use hate speech toward wlw' is Erika responding "sweetie, I'm proud to be with you."

The comic is still up with a disclaimer that it was written at a different time, and I know that's probably not going to fly with a lot of people but if you were a bi woman in the early to mid 2000s it was pretty common to use statements like "lol yeah i'm into women my boyfriend is fine with it as long as I take pictures" to diffuse the biphobia from straight people AND to say shit like "I'm not a party bi, I actually love pussy, thanks" to diffuse the biphobia from queer people. (if you were a bi guy in the early to mid 2000s i'm sorry and I'm sorry now because we got LUG but that mostly went away and you *still* have to deal with the "gay in waiting" bullshit).

That comic ends with Erika and her partner looking at a woman and saying "I'd totally do her" while the woman thinks "pigs" and if you think that means that they literally sat on the street and vocally commented about lesbians passing by them or that they condone harassing lesbians (in, I cannot stress this enough, a diary comic written by someone in their early twenties who is realizing they are occasionally interested in some men some of the time after identifying as a lesbian their whole life), then I'm gonna go ahead and recommend signing up for some variety or other of literary analysis class. Do we think that Erika is seriously implying that she is going to make her boyfriend gay if she fucks him in this comic from a year later?

If this comic bothers you and you see it as a straight-passing couple giving the go-ahead to harass lesbians, you do you, I'm not saying you have to read the comic or enjoy Erika Moen.

I am saying it's a bit of a stretch, though, and certainly the least charitable explanation possible, and that we should probably give people some space to say awkward things about their sexuality and to make missteps when discussing it in their early twenties and not call them lesbophobic fifteen years after the fact for a college comic.

Moen also gets called transphobic because she has described trans men as adorable/cute in a way that could be read as patronizing in one comic and because she made a comic about wearing a packer for fun and for sexual gratification with her cis male partner as a cis woman.

Appropriately, all of these things feel very "late twenty teens tumblr callout post."

If it bugs you, you don't have to read the comics but I've talked about Moen before and I've gotten the anons in my inbox calling me lesbophobic for recommending her comic when in 2007 she made a comic about catcalling lesbians and condoning street harassment.

Which is frustrating because Erika Moen writes a comic about sex toys that has incredible body and gender diversity and is interested in making sure that people of all sexualities are having safe, enjoyable sex and talking openly about it. This is Rebecca Sugar condones war crimes level discourse over a creator who makes a genuinely good comic and gets dismissed as cringe by people who hate open discussions of sex and gets dismissed as a bigot (in ways that I think are incredibly unfair given the vast majority of her work) among people who *claim* to love open discussions of sex but who *actually* love witch hunts.

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cowboybeepboop · 1 year

Text

Through the window

“Fuck you”

“Baby thats what youre gonna do”

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x fem!reader

Genre: smut

Word count: 2214

Summary: Late night self pleasure turns into more than self pleasure.

Warnings: p in v, mainly porn with some plot, disgusting words for clit cause it got a little awkward at 1 am, use of vibrator, age gap (like three years), major daddy issues, kinda some Voyeurism, roughness from Bradley but with sweetness, praise kink, hair pulling, getting caught.

A/N: Literally just me writing this while sobbing to Shawn Mendes songs, also I wrote most of it while sitting out in front of my school 💪😩💪 I’m a fucking vibe. I don't know if there's like a big fandom on here anymore considering Top Gun Mav has been out for a while now but yk who cares. Also lowkey have been binging Harry Potter and the last of us so maybe I’ll write some of that later. Not proof read like ever

Bradley has been your built-in best friend, being Mavericks daughter means that you spent the majority of your childhood eating dinners with Carole, having Carole brush your hair and tuck you into bed. Carole Bradshaw became your adoptive mom, she taught you to cook, bake, sew, she helped you with your homework and made sure you knew your worth.

Mav was hardly ever around, he put his heart and soul into being a better person so that Goose wouldn’t be disappointed in him, this being said he forgot about the responsibility of actually taking care of his child. But you never blamed him for it, maybe it’s because when he was there with you all he ever wanted to do was cuddle on the couch watching your favorite films. Sometimes he would come home and lay his head on your lap and you would brush and braid his hair.

So, because of your sometimes absentee father, Bradley filled in. He was there with Mav for every milestone, kindergarten graduation, elementary school choir concerts, he even took time from his busy schedule to come to your highschool graduation.

Which makes your sexual attraction to him all the more disgusting, he basically was your stand in father, even though he was only 3 years older than you. But when Maverick finally realized he had a responsibility to spend more time with you, Brad stopped being like a father figure and more like an older friend who you had the hots for.

Bradley hasn’t been home for months-or longer, you totally haven’t been counting, and it totally hasn’t been exactly 8 months 3 weeks and 5 days. He isn’t planning on coming back any time soon, at least if he is he hasn’t told you, which is why you’re stuck pouting with your face between your hands as a few people purchase drinks from the bar.

You work at Penny’s bar, The Hard Deck, which is lowkey awkward considering your dad used to date her. But nonetheless she treats you like her own daughter. The only thing you dislike about working with her is the fact that she scolds you when you flirt while working, it's understandable but makes you want to roll your eyes.

Maverick walks in with a small smile on his face, sitting down at the bar in front of you, “How’s your day Y/N?”.

“It’s pretty good Mav, Penny might want to talk to you though,” winking at him you walk away, heading in the direction of the dart board.

“Hey boys, need a refill?” you smile sweetly, tapping your heel against the wooden floor softly.

“Thank you, baby girl,” Hangman smirks as he hands you the empty bottles, “you know which tab to add it to right?” he nods toward Coyote.

You give a small nod and head back to the bar to grab two more beer bottles, you add the total to Coyote’s tab. He lost in darts, even after covering Jake’s eyes, one more night and you don’t think you’ll be able to withstand his charm any longer.

“Y/N it’s time for you to clock out, if you want to beat the rush and get to your date on time,” your eyes light up.

“Thank you Pen!” you smile gathering your things before clocking out. “See you tomorrow evening.” Penny nods at you, smiling at you softly as you rush out of the door.

__________

Hours have passed along with another failed attempt at online dating. Both things have led to you lying in your bed holding your breath as you imagine what it'd be like if Bradley came home and surprised you.

It started off innocent, him holding your waist close to him, the heat radiating from his chest as you sucked in a deep breath. Basking in his mahogany, sandalwood and vanilla musky scent, it made your knees weak, your eyes roll into the back of your head.

Your body felt hot, like you were boiling from the insides out. Squeezing your legs tightly together to keep your panties from soaking your bedsheets.

While biting your lip you carefully open the shoebox hidden underneath your bed, grabbing your bright pink bullet vibrator. If your dad came home, you’d know, so locking the door wasn’t a big priority.

Sucking in a deep breath you relax against your plush mattress. Licking your lips you spread your legs being gentle while unbuttoning your shirt, being slow with each button to build up the tension.

Once you finally peel off your blouse, you throw it to the side of the room before leisurely unzipping your skirt. You’re starting to become impatient, every part of your body is aching to be touched by Bradley’s calloused hands.

“For fucks sake,” a soft whine escapes your parted lips, squeezing your eyes shut you begin roaming your hands all over your body. You squeeze the soft part of your body, moaning Bradley’s name as you do so.

Spreading your legs, you pull down your panties, running a finger through your soaked lips. Once you find the bundle of nerves you start rubbing soft and steady circles into it, this causes your hips to jerk a little while your eyes roll back.

You wrap a hand around your neck putting a comfortable amount of pressure on it, soft moans spill from your lips as you push your hips up begging for more friction. You press the smooth button, listening to the faint hum, you press down two more times. The soft hum from before has become more intense and slightly louder.

Let’s be honest, masturbation is nothing compared to sex. Especially the sex you’ve been dreaming and lusting over since age 16.

A soft smile forms on your lips as you press the rough tip against the hood of your clit, your muscles all tense up while your breathing stops for just a second. It sounded like a rock or something else small had hit your window, after waiting for a few seconds you decide it's probably nothing and press the vibrator against your nub.

You bite down on your lip harshly, squeezing your neck roughly. Sadly, you have a shitty toy because desperate times call for desperate measures so there isn’t much more it can give. Removing the hand from your neck, pushing two fingers into your pulsating hole.

Unbeknownst to yourself, there was now a visitor in your room, one who snuck in from your open window. Hiding in the dark corner next to your window, a hand clasped against his mouth as he absorbed the sight of you desperate and needy begging for more.

“Bradley harder!” you moan loudly, as you pick up the pace of your fingers,your back arching. Cum spills from your pussy, you sink back into the mattress, sighing discontentedly.

“Oh, Sweetheart.” the familiar voice rings through the now silent room. You instantly throw your hands over your chest and squeeze your legs together tightly. “If you needed some help you could have just asked for it.” Bradley walks out into the middle of your room, staring down at you with darkened eyes.

“B-bradley, when did you get in here?” you try to play it cool but sweat is forming on your forehead as you rapidly cover up with a blanket, eyes shifting to the window.

“Do you mean, how much did I see? Or rather how much I heard?” He raises his eyebrows with a smirk, you nod as your cheeks turn a deep red. “Not much, just you pleading for me to be rougher, is that really how you like it princess?”.

“Bradley! Shut up,” you cover your face with your hands while trying to figure out the best thing for you to do now. “Look, I didn’t know you were stopping by. I’m sorry that you, uhm, that you saw what you saw.” Your voice cracks while you barely take a breath, his shoes clack against the floor as he makes his way to you.

The dip in the bed being the sign that he’s next to you. “Y/N, I really don’t care.” He pries your hands off your face. “I know you didn’t know I was coming into town, because it was a surprise.” He sucks in a deep breath, “I just didn’t know I was the one who would be surprised.”

The room fills with silence, just your accelerated breathing and the ticking of your alarm clock. “Hey Brad… Can you please leave?” you push your face into your knees.

Bradley licks his lips, “I think I have a better idea,” he runs a finger down your spine while pressing kisses into your shoulder. Your body relaxes into him as you sigh quietly, he pulls your face from your legs “Look at me, my pretty girl,” you slowly open your eyes while avoiding making eye contact,

“Darlin’ I want you to look in my eyes,” biting your lower lip you look up at him innocently, his hands move to cup your cheeks and pull you into his face. “Fuck, you’re so hot,” he grips your neck and leans into kiss you.

You move onto his lap while tangling your fingers in his hair, he groans into your mouth before pulling back. Bradley pulls away from your lips and moves to kiss your neck, using his body to push your back against your bed. You gasp as he explores your body with his mouth, calloused fingers pinching your nipples.

Arching into him you moan loudly as he pushes a finger into your throbbing pussy. “You like that?” his voice low and seductive, using his thumb he presses your nub softly. Bradley presses kisses all over your stomach, groaning at the sight of you so needy under him, pre cum leaks from his tip as he grinds against the bed.

“I need you right now, please,” you grab Bradley by his face and pull him up. Kissing his lips passionately while grinding down on his fingers.

“Oh what a needy little slut you are, huh?” He pushes two more fingers into you, “is this what you needed? Or is this a little more up your alley.” He smirks while wrapping a hand around your throat, applying ample pressure.

“Fuck you,” you groan, lips parting as your chest heaves, gasps pouring from your mouth.

“Baby, that's what you’re gonna do,” he taunts, Bradshaw has had enough. He finally lays down and pulls you onto his stomach, his hands massage your thighs as he lifts your hips up.

“Bradley wait,” your hands rest on his chest, “ condom, left middle drawer”. He leans over grabbing the small golden wrapper, ripping it open with his teeth, fumbling with the latex as he squeezes it over his tip.

“Thanks for reminding me princess,” he tucks your hair behind your ear, “now ride me babe,”.

Lining your hole up with his tip you begin to lower yourself down on him, moans leave your parted lips. He furrows his eyebrows, hands moving up to cup your breasts, you sink down on his length, wincing at the uncomfortable stretch.

“Fuck, good girl,” bradley groans, his shakey breathing fills your senses. You lift your hips slowly bouncing on his dick, he grabs your ass squeezing roughly. Your hands explore his abs as you use his body to steady your own.

Your eyes squeeze tight, body tightening up around him. Twirling your fingers into your hair you grasp the strands pulling at his roots.

Bradley flips the pair of you over, his eyes dark and dominant as he hovers over you, his hips thrust into yours at a steady pace. He lowers his head to suck on your erect nipple, one hand wraps around your neck squeezing just enough to slow your breathing.

Your arms wrap around his neck as you pull him to you, kissing his lips passionately, your nails dig into his back. Bradley presses his middle finger into your clit, rubbing rough circles into it, while trying to hold back moans you bury your face in his nape.

His thrusts become sloppy, bradleys hand tightens around your neck causing you to arch into him, he leans down sucking dark hickeys into your neck. “Darling, I’m so close,” the sound of skin slapping fills the room as you nod in response.

“Me too Bradley,” you whine quietly. Bradley uses his middle and pointer finger to rub sloppy circles into your sensitive nub, causing your body to jerk forward and your eyes to flutter shut, soft moans fill his ears.

He runs his hand through your hair pulling your head back. Bradley throws his head back in pleasure, you begin to tighten up around him drawing out a long groan. “Rooster,” you chant his name, “more, please I need more,”, he complies with your desires and angles your bodies so he hits even deeper.

Hugging your body close to his, he thrusts a couple more times before you cum around him, Bradley slows down as he cums. His body jerks softly, “Thats the best welcome home present ive ever gotten love,” he whispers into your ear.

Your bedroom door opens, revealing Maverick, “Get your clothes on and meet me in the living room,” his stern voice shakes you to the core.

Well shit

#top gun #top gun fandom #top gun x reader #top gun maverick #top gun smut #top gun rooster #rooster x reader #rooster x you #bradley bradshaw fic #bradley bradshaw x female reader #top gun imagine #top gun maverick smut #top gun fic #miles teller #miles teller imagine #miles teller x reader #phoenix top gun #bob top gun #fanboy top gun

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clanwarrior-tumbly · 1 year

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i don't much know tmc so i hope this makes sense, but 65 for adam and jonah and friendly alternate reader? maybe it goes the way you laid out in your original post, where the events of volume 2 make them distrust reader briefly and the fic is set in the aftermath?

Good idea! Also this is slightly different from how I wrote those hcs, but the general idea is still there!

65) "I didn't mean it...please forgive me."

.......

While waiting for your human friends to finish their investigation inside the house, you remained in the van that you all arrived in, trying your best to remain patient.

You would have much rather accompanied them, knowing of the dangers present....however the fragile trust you've formed with the two was close to shattering.

Preacher arrived without any warning on the second night, and you caught her whispering things to Adam while he was trying to get some sleep. Jonah was wide awake and had the misfortune of seeing her face-to-face before he hid somewhere, allowing you to confront her.

Although you succeeded in driving her off by pretending that they were your victims to claim, he wildly misinterpreted your actions and believed you summoned her here to kill them both. He didn't believe your ruse for a second, as he freaked out on you and demanded you to get out.

In fear of triggering a panic attack in the already frightened boy, you just quietly left, but stayed inside the van to ensure that no other Alternates could interfere with the radio signal or hijack it.

Yet as the minutes dragged on, you grew more and more worried about their well being.

Preacher easily believed your lie--considering Alternates were master manipulators--so she won't be coming back anytime soon...but you didn't like the thought of leaving those two all by themselves.

Sometime later you saw the front door open, and you teleported out of the van, finding Jonah standing there. He appeared unharmed, much to your relief.

However that's when you noticed only he emerged from the house..Adam was nowhere in sight.

"Jonah, are you alright? Where's Adam?"

"Th-The basement door opened..and he wanted to check it out. I-I told him not to, but he wouldn't listen!" He panicked, before he suddenly fell silent as his expression turned to a hateful scowl--aimed at you. "I bet you opened it, didn't you? Or was it your freaky lady friend?"

"That was neither my doing nor hers. And she's not my "lady friend"." You huffed, wishing he'd stop accusing you. "Why did you leave him all alone in there? It's too dangerous."

"He doesn't know the first thing about "danger". You don't think I've been trying to tell him these ghost hunts are gonna get us killed one day?! It's like he doesn't even hear me! We both know his mom is dead and he's looking for something that's not actually there..but god forbid I ever tell him that. I'm just sick of him getting pissed off at me for wanting to fucking live."

"I understand your frustration, but..leaving him behind is not the solution here." You tried to reason with him. "To my knowledge that's not how friends should treat each other, even if they-"

"I'm not sure if I even see him as my "friend" anymore." He scoffed, hugging himself as the air grew chillier. "He literally screamed at me to leave, [y/n]. So that's what I'm doing. I don't give a shit about him or the fame or the money anymore. I'm done. I'm going back home. Alone."

Hoping to put this conversation to rest, Jonah stormed past you and hopped into the driver's seat, trying to start the engine...but it wasn't turning on at all.

He tried hotwiring it as well--to no avail.

"Shit, [y/n]..are you doing this?" He glanced at you, annoyed. "Are you screwing with the transmission?"

"........."

"C'mon, I'm not in the mood for-"

"We cannot leave him behind, child." You insisted. As much as you hated to anger your friend, this was the only way he'll listen. "Is this truly how you wish to end things between you two?"

"I'm not a child, I'm a grown ass man. And I've made my choice, and he made his."

"It doesn't have to be that way. I can still help you both-"

"If you're so insistent on "helping" me, you'll let me start this goddamn car and stay out of my life!!" Jonah slammed his hands on the steering wheel, but unfortunately for him, you weren't about to give into his childish tantrum.

"The only way I can help you is by NOT letting you leave." You shook your head, trying to stay calm and logical. "There is no running away anymore, Jonah. If the others realize you are all by yourself...they will come for you, including him."

"...wait, how do you know he'll show up?" He blinked.

"Because...I've known him since our creation. I'm aware of his patterns. Your government calls him Intruder, children call him Stanley....we call him Six. His connection with technology knows no boundaries, including radios and GPS, so it's imperative that I'm here to stop him from- "

"Oh, so you've been bffs with that child kidnapper since the dawn of time...and you're telling me he could've been fucking eavesdropping on all our conversations regarding BPS?!!"

"I.." For a moment you tensed up, realizing you may have said too much. "No, Jonah. That's not what-"

"Damn, I wish I knew all of that before we decided to trust you." Tears welled up in his eyes again, threatening to spill over. "Adam never should've let you come along. I told him he was making a huge mistake letting you out of that TV..and guess who was right?!!"

Your nonexistent heart sunk slightly at his words.

"Jonah, please calm down. You're not thinking-"

You tried setting a comforting hand on his shoulder, but he violently smacked it away before your claws could even graze his jacket.

"DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!! You're all the same....you're a bunch of heartless, lying, demonic bastards who destroyed our lives and made our loved ones kill themselves!!" He choked out. "You've taken everything from us...a-and if it weren't for you....THEN MAYBE ADAM WOULD STILL BE ALIVE RIGHT NOW!!"

You physically flinched at his screaming, having never seen a human look so enraged...yet sorrowful at the same time. The emotions emanating from him were quite powerful, and when he stopped to take several deep breaths, you needed a moment to absorb them all.

But seeing as you didn't immediately leave, Jonah felt his resolve completely crumble as he gritted his teeth together, trying to stop his sobs from escaping..only for them to come out as small hiccups and gasps.

"J-Just stop pretending to care, alright? Go and...a-and leave me be." Tears streaked down his face as he clutched the steering wheel with trembling hands, laying his head on it as he tried muffling his sobs.

He felt like he just gave himself M.A.D with how badly he felt like dying right now.

Although you were initially stunned by his emotions going from one extreme to the other so quickly, you snapped out your shock and frowned slightly at his distraught state.

'He's so young...and has gone through far too much...'

You gently reached over to set your hand on his back, feeling his entire body trembling beneath your fingertips. Surprisingly enough, he didn't shove your comfort away this time as he was too busy scrubbing away his tears.

You understood that he didn't actually mean those hurtful things. He just needed to lash out after all the stress of these past few nights, and you so happened to be the closest person--whose species is the very cause of his anxieties.

"[Y/n]..I-I..I know you're not like the others. It's just...I'm so lost and I'm so fucking scared to lose one more friend...!" His voice cracked. "I-I don't wanna lose him.."

"I know, my little fish.." You soothed. "I know your heart and mind are deeply troubled. I know you're very afraid...but rest assure, I will not let anything bad happen to either of you. Whatever you think of my kind is fine, but please understand that I would never pretend to care for your safety. It is...my purpose to protect you both from their evil ways."

"..a-according to who?"

"Me. Not my "Savior" or anybody else." Taking your hand off his back, you stepped away as he finally looked up at you. His eyes were wet and tinted red from crying so hard, but through blurred vision he could see you offering your hand. "Come, let us seek out Adam. I sense he is still alive."

With a small nod, Jonah grasped your hand so you could help him out of the van, though as soon as you let him go....he hugged you unexpectedly.

You blinked, looking down at him in confusion. "Jonah? Is everything okay?"

"Y-Yeah, I...I'm just sorry about what I said to you." He sniffled quietly, his forehead pressed to your chest. "I didn't mean it..please forgive me. You know how I tend to say stupid shit when I'm scared and-"

"You needn't justify yourself, my friend. I absolve you." You smiled as you patted his head. "I have gotten worse insults in my lifetime, so they don't affect me as much."

"Good to know. Also...why did you call me "little fish"? I don't hate it or anything, but I was wondering."

"Ah, because you remind me of some...old friends, we'll say. Were you ever told the story of Jonah and the Whale?"

"...uh-"

"What ever happened to "I won't be here to confirm that"?"

The moment was cut short as Jonah suddenly let you go, looking back to see Adam emerge from the house completely unharmed. He had the camcorder and other equipment in his arms, and an annoyed expression on his face.

As he approached the van, he stopped short upon seeing the other male, blinking in bewilderment. "Were you crying?"

"..n-no, it's the allergies. I told you it's that damn cat's fault.." After making a point to wipe his eyes, Jonah shoved his hands into his pockets. "So um...what did you find in that basement?"

"Just an old TV. And you're right about that cat..it was actually an Alternate. But I got some other good footage, so I'm ready to bail."

"What about staying-?"

"We'll tell the lady we stayed all three nights." Adam shrugged. "It's not like she'll know."

"Oh, so now you listen?"

"....look, this shit's getting heavy. So if you don't mind-"

"I'll help." You spoke up, disliking this growing tension in the air as you took the heavier equipment away from Adam and loaded up the van with it.

But still, you refused to allow it to start, and Jonah knew exactly why.

He couldn't just act like he didn't have that huge fight with his friend only a short time ago, so they both talked for a few minutes, apologizing to one another and hugging it out.

When they heard the engine crank on, they immediately rushed towards the van...only to see you sitting behind the wheel, much to their confusion.

They didn't know Alternates could drive.

"You kids had a rough few nights. I'll take us wherever you desire to go." You offered.

"Jeez, since when did we have our own chaperone?" Adam rolled his eyes, but opted to climb into the back while Jonah called shotgun. "I guess we owe you an apology too, right?"

"Well..Jonah and I talked it out already, but I forgive you both."

"Yeah...I still feel like shit, though."

"Dude," the brunette huffed. "What did you say to them?"

Jonah opened his mouth to speak, but thought better of it as he didn't wanna bring up the harsh words he said out of frustration and anxiety. Instead he just shook his head. "I-It doesn't matter. Let's just get outta here and go for some pizza."

"I would very much like that." You agreed, backing out of the driveway and heading down the main road.

"And....as thanks for putting up with our bullshit, we'll let you pick the toppings this time."

"What?!" Adam's jaw dropped, but your smile only grew, and he had no choice but to relent.

It was certainly something to think about on the way to the pizza shop you all knew and loved.

#leave it to alternate y/n to break the canon /ref #clanask #anonymous #mandela catalogue x reader #the mandela catalogue x reader #tmc x reader #alternate reader #alternate y/n #adam murray #jonah marshall #platonic #hurt/comfort #angst/horror prompt

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monstersinthecosmos · 8 months

Note

🔥 + kink in VC

(also thinking like in comparison to Anne's other books like CoSB and realizing VC is so fucking mild and antis have no business being in Anne Rice fandom)

Dsjgkalsdg comrade why are you asking me this you know I’m about to launch into a TED Talk.

So like, if we compare Anne’s Sleeping Beauty books to VC, I feel like the kink is meta in two completely different ways, like opposite ends of the spectrum. In SB, the BDSM is meta in the sense that it’s built into the universe. They are not books ABOUT BDSM, they are books about fantasy and the kinks just get to exist. It’s an immersive fantasy that takes all the ways people play IRL and makes it canon. And a lot of people who dislike them (based on like bad GoodReads reviews LOL) ONLY see them as rape books and don’t really understand the way it’s giving BDSM a space to breathe.

What vanilla folks don’t understand is that IRL BDSM is also fiction a lot of the time. Even tame shit like spanking and talking dirty—do these people actually want their partners to hit them in their day-to-day lives? Do they want to be catcalled and lewded outside of the scene? Probably not! And even going to more in depth scenes like, do you actually think you’re someone’s kitty? Do you actually want an assailant to tie you up? Do you actually want to be trafficked?

No! You dont’! You want to play pretend with your partner, with whom you’ve consented.

And I think this attitude in the bad reviews is also the attitude that fanfic writers get from conservatives/radfems/swerfs/fancops in fandom, that somehow writing noncon fic or darkfic in general is somehow making these atrocious things literal, when in fact THEIR EXISTENCE WITHIN A WORK OF FICTION AUTOMATICALLY MAKES THEM NOT LITERAL. And people need to understand that the consent for stories like this is not about the fictional people involved who do not exist and therefore cannot consent, but between the reader and the author when you open the book.

Anyway I bring that up because these books tell me a lot about Anne’s sensibility for kink. SHE GETS IT MAN. She wasn’t shy about it. So I think it speaks very broadly to the way power dynamics and monsterfuckery are expressed within VC, as well, even though these are two very opposite ends of the spectrum with her writing, I think that same confidence and kink positivity still exists. There's also a foreward to the copy of SB that I read, I think she added in 2012, and it was SO insightful about her process and her intention writing the kink & porn the way she did and I just think she really fucking understood what she was doing. And it's so telling to me because like, she mentions she used the pen name when she first wrote them because her father was alive and she was embarrassed, and one of the first scenes in SB is Beauty being stripped naked and paraded around IN FRONT OF HER FATHER LOL. So like WITHOUT GOING OFF ON A SIDE TANGENT something else vanilla folks don't understand is that so often kink is about the thing being transgressive and gross and uncomfortable; IT'S HOT BECAUSE IT'S UNCOMFORTABLE. It's not something that anyone literally wants, it's just hot because it's WRONG. And I think often about how this is like, the sex equivalent of trying not to laugh at an off-color joke, and how it's not that the joke is funny but that it's so off-putting that you laugh at the absurdity of it.

I feel like the kink in VC is meta in an opposite way, in the way it’s so symbolic and understated. Also because the vampires are asexual it gives a whole layer of like non-sexual BDSM dynamics are it’s SO GOOD.

So I think coming from an author was not squeamish about writing immersive BDSM, a lot of those themes are in VC and I wonder if they come from the same place, even if it’s subliminal on her part. Like the power dynamics, consent around biting, THE CONSTANT MONSTERFUCKING & FLIRTING WITH DEATH AKA “THE SWOON”. And even later in TVA with the introduction of the whipping scene and all Armand’s comments about getting tied up and having his fuckin, pit hair tugged on or whatever.

And it has some of those like sort of dubcon romance tropes that I think we can’t discard; being TAKEN! Being OVERPOWERED! It ties into vampire fiction in general with like, vampires historically being a symbol of sexuality, going back to like Dracula comin in ur window and everything.

But VC never makes it “about” kink, it’s just like SB, just baked into the themes. And like a lot of the more obvious BDSM themes in VC are also not consensual, they’re just built into the universe. Like Armand stalking/abusing Daniel, like Marius whipping Armand without negotiating first, like Akasha’s femdom murder bender. And even how often biting gets used as a symbol for sex, and how often noncon biting gets called rape! And the characters know it! And they do it anyway! (Also I cannot neglect to mention obvious tropes like Marius/Armand just being a teacher/student trope. IT'S A PORN TROPE! Or what about Gabrielle as Mommy!Dom? PORN TROPE! Quinn/Goblin twincest? PORN TROPE! The exhibitionism/public humiliation on the TDV stage hello???? That's like an Upper Floor party come on LOL. [this type of dynamic is also SO SO prevalent in SB.])

I’m not really sure what my conclusion here is because like, I just think this is all here in the books and it’s really excellent fodder to talk about kink and character dynamics. Power dynamics is so huge in BDSM and it’s so so huge in VC, not just like, vampires being old and powerful and having that as a status symbol over one another, but even emotionally speaking like. TELL ME THAT ARMAND & LESTAT AREN’T ABSOLTUELY SOAKED IN HUMILIATION AND BEGGING. Taking inventory of VC ships like there’s ALWAYS a dominant and a submissive, it’s so rare that people are just equals with each other, and it’s always part of the appeal!

There’s this psychologist Esther Perel, I think she’s brilliant and she’s very kink positive and has a bunch of podcasts and stuff. I read her book Mating in Captivity and she brought up this whole thing about kink and power dynamics and how like, it’s not always clear who’s in charge, and you can’t judge relationships based on who’s older, who makes more money, who’s larger, etc, because power dynamics are so much more complicated than that. She uses the example that if you’ve ever been in public with a screaming toddler, which of you is really the dominant? I think about this constantly!

And like speaking about real life kink being so deeply about CONSENT means so much to me with this conversation about VC, too, because like even looking at a relationship like Marius & Human!Armand or Armand and Human!Daniel, it doesn’t matter that one is a powerful vampire if they also feel so tenderly towards their fragile little human. TVA was very explicit about this when they have that conversation about which one of them is the other’s slave. So in BDSM even though we look at the dom as being the one in control, the consent is the thing in control and ultimately the SUB is in control by permitting all of it!

So I just feel very strongly about all of this, it’s all over VC, and even when it’s less obvious (relationships like Loustat, like Lestat/Armand, even Louis/Claudia) there are so many of these power elements to examine. Even if it’s not written TO BE KINKY they’re still there and I think it’s all connected, because I’m kink positive and I love unpacking this stuff.

AND ALSO LIKE ON THE ASEXUAL FRONT, I love it so much because like as a kinky ace, and knowing as many kinky aces as I know, there’s SO MUCH KINK out there that is NOT SEXUAL so I think it just translates so nicely to VC vampires being asexual, like it all makes so much fucking sense to me and it’s so fun and I adore it so much!!!

THIS WAS PURE STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS IM GONNA POST IT BEFORE I GET WORRIED THAT IM NOT COHESIVE, ENJOY!!!

#asexual vc #KINK META #deep ass thoughts about vampires

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ambelle · 9 months

Text

I’ve talked vaguely about white liberals treatment of BW both in real life and in fandom spaces but I feel I should expand on that.

A while back a BW wrote an article about how BM are the white people of the black community. White people were offended and baffled and BM protested. The thing is it's very much true. BM, along with BW are oppressed under a system stacked against us (along with many other demographics), but because BW are women we are also oppressed by BM.

White liberals have the privilege to not have grown up in the hood like I did. So they can claim a world without cops wouldn't turn into open season on BW at the hands of BM. They can say gangs, drive-bys, and drug dealers aren't dangerous and BM shouldn't be prevented from doing it. But when I was little I couldn't use the playgrounds because drug dealers used them as a place to deal and recruit little boys. I couldn't go to the local skating rink because gangs would go there to fight and shoot it up. I had to play in the street with my friends because the MEN in the community were ruining spaces meant for children. Erasing safety in general actually. Not the white president, the men in the community. I can say systematic racism and the BM who did a random drive-by on my house and raped little girls were both oppressing me. Both are true.

But it's not true to the white liberals who have a complete blind spot when it comes to BW because they don't acknowledge we are women. They see us as strong unwavering aggressive machines. We make good allies but they don't need to help us because we are invincible duh. It's the "bw saved the day" shit after every election followed by them going right back to ignoring us the next day.

It's them ignoring all the crazy stats about violence against BW to whitesplain to us how abolishing the police is a great idea. The men harming us will simply stop if they know we don't even have someone we may call for help. Let's abolish the police because they harm BM and BM never do anything they should be arrested for including my rapist. He was simply a victim of white supremacy and I should have hugged him after like the strong mammy I was born to be. No need to talk about black femicide.

Basically, white liberals care about BM (because it's trendy not because they give a shit see ANTIFA), BW care about BM, BM care about BM, and no one gives a shit about BW. That's the reality

But white libs in fandoms are racist in a different way. They like to adopt the struggles of demographics that are oppressed in real life and apply it to white characters. It's why characters like Silco and Jinx are so appealing to them.

(both trying to kill Zaunites here BTW)

Make no mistake If Silco were black fans would be holding them accountable same with Jinx. But they are white and they are (were) oppressed. That's literally a white liberal dream. They get to ignore the fact that Silco and Jinx are rich and they got rich by oppressing poor people and forcing children into child labor.

(that Zaunite teen boy died not that anyone cares. )

They get to weaponize classism to excuse the violence and murder they commit against other poor people. Who cares how many orphans he creates or how many poor children he tries to murder.

Mind you not only was Silco rich off the backs of poor people and the labor of kids, he used the enforcers to help him not only oppress his own people but also frame Ekko (ironically a BM) and the Firelights for crimes he and Jinx were committing.

Jinx who killed multiple Zaunites on purpose and tried to kill Ekko later on. Jinx who is rich and has no motive for the violence she commits. Jinx who is working for the man she KNOWS killed her father figure and tried to kill her siblings. Jinx who never once takes responsibility for any of the choices she makes. But she's white. It's why the fandom supports her hetero ship with Ekko (who they headcanon as being her emotional crutch). They only care about heteronormativity when there is a black woman they want to erase. No other straight pairing gets called "disgusting", "forced", "shoehorned", "a betrayal", or "immoral". Mel is forceful and aggressive. She's a seductress who manipulates Jayce into her bed and into doing her evil deeds.

(He's clearly not into her at all)

He should be kissing Vik's ass and worshipping the ground he walks on. Speaking of Viktor ...him using tech for his own gains, secretly merging his DNA with the core, getting addicted to shimmer, killing a fellow Zaunite and converting up her death + stealing her notes is something no one will discuss.

Because he's white , was once poor, and is "gay-coded". He's thus entitled to murdering a brown woman and entitled to Jayce's body. They weaponize LGBTQ+ rep in order to justify their racism much like the left does in real life.

Mel who shows no ill will towards Viktor is accused of being ableist and classist because she gave him a look when he was arguing with her. Mel who explains why she wants defensive weapons and has several scenes reiterating her motive is accused of wanting war and genocide.

Mel who has exchanged flirty looks with Jayce every episode before she kisses him is accused of raping him. Mel who isn't at all a part of the Vander/Silco/Jinx shenanigans in ep 1 is blamed for the death of Jinx's family because she "controls the council" (even though they often vote against her and Heimerdinger gets a pass despite being there when the cities were founded). Because she's black and rich. Thus they can weaponize poverty in order to villainize BW.

They shout over the people who are actually oppressed. Over the people who know what it's like to have drug dealers and gangs make your life hell while the government does the same on a less personal scale.

This is what white liberals do. It's not new. I won't even get into the weird ass envy/hatred/lust thing they have for bw. The dehumanizing and hypersexualizing shit they do is a whole other essay.

#long post #mel medarda #white liberals #fandom racism #fandom misogynoir #arcane

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natsaffection · 1 year

Note

Hellooo, how are u? Hope you’re okay ;)

You said we could send request so… i was thinkin if you could write one(before chapter 4, when they were still following the contract, in one of the date nights) where reader is making like a nice christmas dinner(a little late, sorry) and nat comes home and they have a nice time please ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

If you want, you could also have nat showing reader a new toy at the end🫣

Thank you so much, i love sugar mommy nat

Pairing: Sugar Mommy!Natasha (37) x Sugar Baby!Reader (21)

First of many! Thank you so much for requesting. I got a little carried away at the end. Hope you Like it!

The others will come in the next few days. Get ready for something sweet..

(っ◔︣◡◔᷅)っ <3

MINOR DNI!! (18+!)

Summary: Your and Natasha's first Christmas, where the presents lead to more.

warnings: self made food, stress on work, sex toy use, begging, Mommy kink, Overstimulation

Word count: 2754

You wanted to be with Natasha over the holidays to celebrate a pleasant holiday with her. However, you quickly found out that she was absolutely not a fan of Christmas.

You woke up early in the morning to an empty bed and found only a note saying that Natasha would be back in the evening. She tried to stay away from Christmas by all means, because as she pointed out, 'she is bad at family things'. Still, you wanted to give her a little joy.

You knew from your recent visits to Natasha's company that everything was pretty cheerful. Even though she was the boss, she had a lot of work and was almost always stressed.

Because she then let it out on you.. may be well noted.

So you wanted to do something good for her this time. It is after all a special day. So you set out and look around her apartment. She must have something here that she would like...Maybe some hobby or something.

However, you found nothing..You go dejectedly to the kitchen where, Sarah is already waiting for you.

"Good morning, Ms. L/n! Any request for breakfast?" You sit down and just mumble, "No, thanks..." Sarah continued to look at you, smiling broadly, "Okay. Let me know if you need help with anything." You see her want to leave until you thought of something,

"Wait! There's actually something..." What could be more romantic than a dinner?

"Yes please?" You stand up and walk over to her, "Can you tell me what Natasha always orders from you? By that, I mean, is there any dish that she likes..."

You saw her start to think... "Well, what would make her happy would definitely be homemade sandwiches! But I don't think that's what you want, is it?"

Sarah knew what you were up to. "Exactly...I want it to be something...nice. Not stuff you can do in three minutes." You were uncomfortable and looked down at the floor. Sarah, on the other hand, just had to smile. "Of course. Just follow me."

Your eyes lit up, again and you followed her into the kitchen. She told you and showed you everything you needed, and since Sarah was so amazed at your Idea, she wrote down the recipe herself, so you wouldn't have to struggle around in the cookbook for hours. You were more than grateful and went straight to work. You had a time frame for when Natasha would be back, but you didn't know how hard this was going to be.

And it was definitely hard. Fuck, you almost set the kitchen on fire. But! It was definitely worth it. It smelled fantastic and still looked perfect at the same time. When you got your hands perfectly dirty, you had also thought about how you could top your gift. And then you thought of the most perfect one. You.

So you went back over to your dressing room and put on another revealing lingerie pair. You admire yourself in the mirror and wow. Natasha will definitely like it.

You had thrown another hoodie and jogging pants over you, so it wouldn't be immediately obvious....

So you were ready and just had to wait for the guest.

Which also arrived a little later.

And Natasha was actually stressed again. Despite the holidays, the company was literally on fire.

She threw the keys into her bowl and stopped in surprise when the smell of her favorite dish hit her. Her thoughts came up like: Where does Sarah get off making it just like that? She knows exactly what Natasha holds over the day.

So she storms into the kitchen and stopped a little later when she saw you behind her counters.

"Y/n? What's this?"

You make your way over to her, "I know you don't like Christmas much, but I still have a few things for you..."

You were now standing in front of her, and she was staring at the kitchen and back at you, "You made this?"

"Yes..I hope you like it..."

"Do I like it?"

Oh, shit..You were too fast..She doesn't like it. She's going to-"

"I love it." You look at her with wide eyes, "Really?" She smirks at you, lifts you up and sits you on the counter, causing several empty pots to fall,

"I didn't know you could cook, Kotenok..."

You look to the side ashamedly, Well...I can't, but I had some help at first."

"That's why it smells burnt in here?" You had to laugh. "Well..I had to find my way around your kitchen first.."

Natasha had to admit that she more than liked that. You just took time out of your day to make her something to eat? For several hours?

"I hope it will taste good..."

"It will. Simply because it's already yours." She kissed you and together you prepared the table. You insisted that you serve her the food, and she accepted with a grin and amusement. You served it and you started to eat. You were genuinely surprised by your own skills, as it really didn't taste bad.

"Maybe I should hire you full time as my new cook." She said it so seriously that you was shocked for a moment, "That was a joke Y/n.." You sigh out,

"Th-that I knew! How was work today?" Natasha shook her head and poured herself a glass of wine, "I don't know what people think to call in sick for the days. They really think I'm completely stupid." You could hear her demeanor getting more serious, "You're not. Okay?" She gulped down the wine and smiled again,

"I know. Thanks though..I still don't get it. They know all the stuff that's attached to my business, and they just leave it like that? I mean, we got it done today, but what if we didn't? There could have been so much money down the drain!" You knew where this was going,

"So back to interviewing," you laugh, poking Natasha. "And how. Full of idiots..."

You both finished eating, and it was actually pretty good..

"Please let Sarah cook again next time." HUH?! Your heart shatters into pieces, "Ow..Was it that bad?" You whimper and Natasha was sorry,

"No, no..Not so bad for a first time.." She only made it worse. She saw your frustration,

"Y/nnn..." But you ignored her, "Then you won't get your second present." Natasha sat back again in surprise, "Y/n, I told you, you don't have to get me anything. I have you and that's enough." Heh, if you only knew.

"Trust me..you'll like this one..." She continued to look at you, sighed as well and stands up,

"Okay, but mine first." She leaves without another word, and you had to drop your "angry" attitude. Natasha has a present for you?!

She came back with two bags. She sat back down and put one of the bags on the table and the other on the floor next to her legs.

"Here." You took it hesitantly. "That wouldn't have-" She held up a finger, "Don't say that. Now open it."

You looked inside and saw another small box with a bow around it. You took it out and opened it.

You could have thrown it away out of reflex, because you loved it so much. "H-How?!" In it were concert tickets of your favorite band, which were sold out after a few minutes.

"Well, as a Bussine's Woman, I'll give you a tip. Never leave tabs open on a laptop. I saw it and knew a few people for the event."

That was a lie. She found the site, yes. But she didn't know anyone. She looked on the Internet for people who had the tickets and offered them four time the price they paid.

You stood up, and the chair almost fell over. You threw your arms around her and she reflexively pulled you onto her lap. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Natasha almost drowned in your kisses until she finally made you stop. "Anytime for you Y/n. So..ready for your second?" That's right, there was something. She bent down and picked up the other box. You took it again and opened it without much hesitation.

And now you were a red tomato.

A new vibrator for Natasha's collection. "I saw it and immediately thought of you."

Natasha studied your reaction. You made it easy for her, though, when you stood up,

"Then it's my turn. Unpack me." She turns to you, "Unwrap you?" She had to chuckle.

You raised your arms and Natasha stood up and walked over to you, "What did my girl come up with, hm?" She took off the sweater, and you climb Simultaneity out of your pants until you were just standing there in the lingerie pair.

"Fuck, Detka..You didn't have to do that..."

You lean back. "For you always."

She looked you up and down and was on top of you in seconds. You jump up so she could just grab you and take you upstairs.

You had a bit of a hard time getting to the top as you didn't leave each other alone for a second on the way.

Finally arrived, she puts you down,

"Kneel down and get your ass in the air."

This is what you've been waiting for all day. Finally.

Natasha could notice your desperation as you've never been on the floor so fast, "What a slut, look at the mess you're already making. Do you actually know how much this laminate costs?" You knew better than to talk, so you shake your head. "How could you anyway..Now then."

You notice Natasha bending down to the level of your ass, as she plays with your new pink toy on your cheeks. She wanted to see you begging, "P-please..." came out almost like a whisper. "Who told you could talk to me anytime?" You answer with a whimper, bending your head even lower.

Natasha didn't make it easy for you as she moved the tip of the vibrator over your hole, "Tell me what you want, princess" Your eyes widened, "Please put it in mommy, please."

"Where? You aren't exactly short on choices here..." She was cruel.."In my pussy, please..." There was silence until you cried out a little as she finally pushed it inside you. You could feel it sticking halfway in you. After that, you hear Natasha get up and sit on the edge of the bed in front of you. "Look at me."

You did slowly, afraid of doing something wrong. To your surprise, you saw Natasha naked and could come right in front of her on the floor. "Do you like the view?" You nod like crazy, "Good." And then.. Natasha spreads her legs in front of you, "Get to work, little one." You forgot about your toy long ago when you saw Natasha's, shiny pussy in front of you. She was fantastic. You don't wait for long and almost fall into her. She lets out a breath as your mouth touched her lips, and you started licking her.

You were so focused on doing everything right that a shock wave came over you as Natasha turns the vibrator to the medium setting. You groaned and had to gasp for air, "What are you doing? Did I tell you could stop?" She reaches out and slides you into her pussy again, leaning down to you at the same time, "You be careful, because if that beautiful thing falls out of you before I come, there will be consequences, understand?" You were about to reply, but were interrupted when Natasha set another level higher. You quickly get back to work, knowing how fast it always goes with you. "Look at this girl right here..like a starving dog, yeah.. Right there!"

Those words gave you a purposeful work-out, however, Natasha was merciless as she pressed suddenly her foot against your own pussy. She wants to win. "Ngh, wait, I-It's gonna-" She kept pressing, and you tried to keep it inside you. But when you tried to close your thighs, the vibrations only got stronger. "Please, no!" And it went out.

You only heard the plump thud on the floor and Natasha's sigh. "I told you..looks like it fell." You just whimpered. Despite the short time, you were so damn sensitive now. "Get on the bed Y/n.." You got up like a flash and in short order you were sitting on it, but not for long.

Natasha came over you like a gazelle and kissed you. You were so distracted by her that you didn't catch her laying you down and holding your arms up, "I took so long to put out this gift for you, and you just drop it like that?" She saw you were about to say something, "You have permission,”

"I'm sorry! But I couldn't help it.." You will say that often enough tonight... she thought to herself. "It's okay..I guess I'll have to help." You suddenly hear the vibrator again, "Keep your arms up there, or I won't hesitate to tie you up, do you understand?"

"Y-Yes mommy..." And she set off. You literally jumped as Natasha placed the toy directly on your clit, "Let's see how long you can hold out this time."

You squirmed in all directions, sure you were going to have muscle hangover in your arms the next day, so tightly you pressed them into the mattress to keep from swinging in the air, "Is my little girl having a hard time with that?" You nod like crazy, "Not hard enough.." And she raises, "Ah! Please! To-"

And up another step. Now you couldn't take it anymore and were about to thrust your hands against the vibrator until Natasha grabbed them on the way and put them back. This time, though, she held them tight.

"What was that about, huh?"

"I can't!!! Too much!" You cried. "Then you should have tried harder earlier..I gave you the chance, Y/n." You felt the knot. "I-I'm coming..." She continued to hold on, "Go ahead, but I'm not going to stop. Not until the whole battery is empty."

Your first orgasm was enough for you, and you were able to breath as Natasha took it off. Not for long though, as she was now pushing it into you. "F-FUCK!" Natasha looked at you, "What was that?" Her grip on your hands tightened, "Did you just curse?" You just sniffed, "I can't help it! Please..."

She didn't give you an answer, just gestures as she turned it on again. It was a weird feeling to not only have it inside you, but at the same time to have it vibrating against your walls. "Please-Mommy-. too..Too much.. " you whimpered, "That's not my name Y/n.." In the room, only your moans and the muffled sounds of the vibrator could be heard. You couldn't help yourself and came completely over her.

"Come again." And you did.

"Again." And you did.

"C-come..n ---" You tried to counter it somehow, but Natasha kept you in her hold, "Hold still."

"PLEASE!!!"

"Are you coming again? Go ahead." You shake your head and were forced to let go. But she didn't stop, "You know the safe word, and you can use it anytime. I won't be mad if you do it, I promise." And she pushed it out and back in. "Look how your pussy is enjoying it.. My pussy, you are doing great. Give me another one.."

"No..." You breath out. "Oh yes you will, color?" You were going to stop.. Were you? You don't know, you feel too good right now to think straight, "G-Gre-en-" Again, you start breathing heavily as she

increases her speed,

"Please, please..." You shake your head and Natasha had to smile, "I'm here Y/n..comon." She was absorbed in the sounds you were making. Your screams were already bordering on animals, so fucked out you were and now you had to prepare for it for the sixth time.

"It's getting harder to get in..Come now or I'll do this to you all night,"

"MOMMYY!!!" Natasha followed your movements and kept you in place as you slowly came down from the trip.

"There she is. Perfect Y/n..I didn't thought you would last this long..." You wanted to confirm, but your mouth was so dry and light at the same time.. You were briefly sure you had no more at all. But Natasha made it wet again as she pulled you into a kiss.

"Merry Christmas baby."

TAG LIST: @natashaswife4125 @trans-wolf-boi @natssluttt @swaqcenix @peggycarter3 @snowdrop1026 @natlover69 @mocswift @mrscromanoff @fxckmiup @ripofflizzie @liidiaaag @scarlettromanof84 @its-just-geek @kksalexa @sayah13 @teenybean @karmasgxrl @xxsekhmet @s1ut4nat @cl-e @unlady-like-12-25-36 @florojas @natashaxwife @paaandiculations @thatkinkylesgirl1 @mymommawanda @inluvwithfictionalwomen @marvelwomen-simp @thesimpvlv @theofficialbugs @mmmmokdok @alianovnasposts @ashleeolsen @natsxwife

#natasha #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff #natasha romanov x reader #natasha smut #nat x reader #natasha romanov smut #dom!natasha x reader #natasha romonova

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girasollake · 2 years

Text

something else | billy hargrove

pairing: billy hargove x sinclair!fem!reader

requested by: anonymous

"hi, can you maybe write something with billy hargrove and the reader being lucas older sister? and billy already knows the reader because he has to pick up max sometimes from lucas place and kind of already developed a crush on the reader without really interacting a lot? thank you!"

type: fluff ig?

warnings: tbh i don't see any

a/n: i literally wrote 5 things and it's hard for me to write more stuff i hate this, this one is pretty short, i'm still working on the rest of the requests i have so they are coming!

word count: like 800?

___________________________

Her skin, her hair, her clothes, everything was so fascinating about her, at least to Billy Hargrove. He caught his eyes tracing her body and face features whenever he was picking up his little sister from the Sinclair’s house. He had never had the courage to actually talk to her though. It was definitely unusual for him, all the girls always loved him and he was used to being wanted by each and every one. This girl however, she never paid any attention to him, something about her was so captivating that Billy was a bit scared to talk to her, he only admired her from afar. One day he was waiting for his sister in the car and he saw her outside hanging out the laundry. Out of the corner of her eye she saw him staring. Placing the basket on the grass she quickly walked into the house.

“Max! Your brother is here!” She yelled while leaning on the wall next to the stairs.

“Tell him I’ll be down in 10 minutes!” She heard the redhead from upstairs.

(Y/n) sighed and went outside through the main entrance. Billy was outside his car smoking, his back was turned to her. She came up to him and poked his upper back with her finger twice. The boy flinched and turned around quickly, eyes wide. She was even more beautiful up close.

“You good? You look like you saw a ghost Hargrove.” He didn’t respond, eyes staring into hers. “Um, well, your sister wanted me to tell you she’ll be down in 10 minutes. You can come in if you want to drink something and wait.”

“I’d love that.” He smirked.

She turned around, Billy following her.

“What’s your name?” He asked.

“Really? I thought you knew.” She snickered and shook her head. “It’s (Y/n).”

“Beautiful name for a beautiful girl.”

She didn’t respond, she didn’t even look at him as she entered her home.

“What do you wanna drink? I have water, orange juice and um.. some soda, but it’s Erica’s so I wouldn’t choose that unless you want to lose your hands or something else.”

“Water’s fine.” He said while sitting on a chair in the dining room.

“Here you go.” She placed the glass in front of him and took a seat across from Billy.

“Thank you, gorgeous.”

“Do you say these sweet words to every girl you meet so that they’ll go to bed with you quicker?” She asked while cocking her head to the side.

Billy choked on the water he was drinking and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Excuse me?”

“You’re just really natural with it so I was just wondering.”

“Was that a compliment?” He asked while raising his eyebrow.

“I dunno, was it?” She smirked and got up. “I’m gonna go finish hanging out the laundry. Take more water if you want to.”

She walked up to the door and started turning the knob.

“Wait, (Y/n)! Do you need help?”

“Billy Hargrove offering some help? I must be dreaming but sure, if you want to.” She chuckled.

She gave him some clothes to hang up and a few minutes later Max and Lucas showed op outside.

“Is that…?” Lucas asked slightly frightened.

“Billy?” Max’s jaw hit the floor.

Her brother? He was helping someone? He was helping Lucas’s sister? That was something she wouldn’t be able to shut up about fot the next few months. He had never helped their mom at home, he had never offered anyone any type of assistance. He must’ve developed a crush on Lucas’s sister if he was acting like that, this would explain this unusual behaviour of his.

“Having fun Billy?” She shouted to her brother.

His smile faded away slightly and he turned his head to look at (Y/n).

“I have to go, thanks for the water.” He smirked and started walking away.

“Thanks for the help.” She smiled.

Billy turned around to face her one more time. Now or never.

“Do you have time this Friday at 8 pm? I know a place you’d like.” He winked.

“I’ll think about it, see you tomorrow.” She smirked not looking at him, her hands fumbling with the rest of the laundry.

“Tomorrow?”

“Yeah, when you’ll pick up Max. Maybe you could help me with some other chores, gorgeous.”

He laughed quietly and nodded his head. Turning around he went towards the car, Max was already inside.

“What was that?” She asked him and giggled when he sat on the driver’s seat, his smile visible.

“Shut up.” He mumbled and turned on the engine.

Tomorrow.

taglist: @stvrdustalexx @ccosmic-illusion @onecrazydirectioner @luvwanda @justice4lils @heizenka @miss-bloodbath @screambih @ilovedilfs32 @squidwardsluverxx @alainabooks143 @evahpmcu @laracrof7s @lyntic @stilesks @greengarsstuff

#billy hargove imagine #imagine #x reader #billy hargrove #stranger things #billy hargrove fluff #billy hargrove x reader #black!reader #black!fem!reader #billy hargrove x you

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foxes-that-run · 7 months

Text

Snow on the beach

Taylor said SOTB is about falling in love in a "cataclysmic, faded moment" at the same time and asking if it is really happening. SOTB is rare love song on Midnights that references an ex and 1989. it’s I Wish you would set later with Harry.

Lyric video

The lyric video recreates the 1989 Rolling Stone shoot, which she previously did in part of the End Game music video that also references Harry. In End Game this refers to "I don't wanna hurt you (I just wanna be) / Drinkin' on a beach with (you all over me)".

All for you like Janet

An 80's icon (a la 1989), Janet was going through a divorce from a low-profile/secret marriage when she wrote All for You. All for you is about sexual liberation of being newly single. Taylor and Joe's long low-profile relationship was ending when SOTB was released, we hadn’t seen Joe much for a year, they walked in NY on release day and never again. The split was announced 5 months later.

Literal Snow on a beach

On 29 December 2011 Taylor posted a photo on a beach with light snow behind her. The shadows on her hair show the sun was either setting or rising inland. It's most likely in the afternoon on a western coast. It snows on the beach in NJ, but that would be very early in the morning and hadn't snowed that year. It did snow on the beach in Liverpool that year, 50 minutes from Harry Styles family house where he was that day. Taylor hadn't been seen for 2 weeks before this photo. See more in 2011 timeline.

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A post shared by The Old Taylor Swift (@theoldtaylorswiftinsta)

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Lyrics

[Verse 1: Taylor Swift] One night, a few moons ago I saw flecks of what could've been lights But it might just have been you Passing by unbeknownst to me Life is emotionally abusive And time can't stop me quite like you did And my flight was awful, thanks for asking I'm unglued, thanks to you

The opening verse we have lights passing her unbeknownst to her, reminding us of him driving past her house in wish you would at night, and Style/HYGTG when he picked her up at night. She’s wishing for him.

‘Life is emotionally abusive and time can’t stop me quite like you did’ “you did”, we’re talking about an ex driving by. Time is no match for her feelings for the muse, it’s been years and she’s still dreaming of him. 'Life is emotionally abusive' because she’s not moved on despite her efforts to have a new life.

Finally, the flight tells us she and the muse are apart, UK/US or with tours, but she doesn't mind she is unglued at the thought of being with her 'cataclysmic' muse (...her calamitous love. ;))

[Chorus: Taylor Swift, Taylor Swift & Lana Del Rey] And it's like snow at the beach Weird, but fuckin' beautiful Flying in a dream Stars by the pocketful You wanting me Tonight feels impossible But it's comin' down No sound, it's all around Like snow on the beach x3

'Weird, but beautiful and dreamlike' depict the joyous feeling of your desire being reciprocated. She's longed for this person so much she's unglued at the idea that it could actually happen after all the time that passed in verse 1.

'No sound' is also similar to 'you can hear it in the silence' from 'You are in love' which is a beautiful moment. In 'You are in love' she sang that you could tell it was love without words, as here. However, we know the absence of those words haunts them, here's hoping for a good post-beach-fireworks chat.

Harry’s leaked Trouble also refers to snow in an unexpected, beachy place “It never snows in Hollywood / But when we sang it showed us that it could”

[Verse 2: Taylor Swift, Taylor Swift & Lana Del Rey] This scene feels like what I once saw on a screen I searched "aurora borealis green" I've never seen someone lit from within Blurring out my periphery My smile is like I won a contest And to hide that would be so dishonest And it's fine to fake it 'til you make it 'Til you do, 'til it's true

I searched "aurora borealis green" and lit from within and blurring out her periphery are references to Harry's green eyes and the magnetic presence she has sung about in other songs.

In the later released 1989 Vault track Suburban Legends his phone caught her peripheral vision. In Snow on the Beach she's so blissful to be back together she's putting past insecurities aside.

She goes on to resolve to let herself be in this blissful moment, get out of her own way and let her feelings be known. She ends with faking it till you make it. I read that as her seeing and setting aside her insecurities until she is confident and feels secure.

I (I) can't (can't) speak afraid to jinx it I (I) don't (don't) even dare to wish it But your eyes are flying saucers from another planet Now I'm all for you like Janet Can this be a real thing? Can it?

Taylor cannot believe that this person she has desired for so long feels the same, she can't dare to dream about it. Finally, she is all for him like Janet - aka feeling sexually liberated after getting out of a long secret/low profile relationship.

#haylor #midnights #taylor swift #snow on the beach #1989 taylor's version #surburban legends #Instagram

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lil-melody-moon · 3 months

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Hello Mel! I hope you’re doing well 🥰 I’ve seen that you reblogged the album ask thingy. I’m not sure if I have to give you the name of the album and a number or just the album and you answer all of the questions. So, If it’s not too much to ask, can you answer all of the 10 questions about Quadrophenia? I know how much you love that album and I’d like to know your thoughts on that one❤️ Also, you know how much I love to see your posts talking about the music you love hehe. Love ya <3

Hello, I've been doing so so but thank you for asking <3

The thing for it is to give a name for the album and some numbers, but what you ask for is perfect! I was hoping for someone to asking about "Quadrophenia", thank you that it was you! So without further ado.

1. Favourite and least favourite track?

Oh Gosh this will be difficult.

"5:15" is my favorite track of the whole album because of a few things. First being the fact that this was the first song I heard from this album. Funny story, mom wrote down a Depeche Mode song called "Little 15" and she wrote that it is a The Who song so I typed it in and "5:15" came up so we've listened. Mom didn't like it very much, but I fucking vibed - you can imagine my sheer surprise when I've found the album where this song was. Also, The Who's compilation CD I have has three tracks from "Quadrophenia" and "5:15" is one of them. Those three are never played quietly on dad's stereo system, never.

Now to the least favorite I actually don't know if I have one like that. I literally love every track on this album, but maybe I'll go with "I Am The Sea" because it's only an ambient of waves - which is very nice as an opening, considering how the story on album opens with "The Real Me", but ya know. Almost no music.

2. Side A or B? (for later releases: first half or second half; for doubles: A, B, C or D?)

This is a double so I have to choose between C and D - A and B are good too, but the rest of the tracks after "5:15" my beloved <3

And I think I'll go with C so that would include: "5:15", "Sea and Sand", "Drowned" and "Bell Boy". There's just something in those tracks that makes me get lost in music each time I hear them. I'm always missing the point where "Sea and Sand" ends and "Drowned" starts. Either it's so smoothly going from one to the other or I'm just so lost between notes. Plus there's "Bell Boy" come on, how could I not pick this side? XD

3. Thoughts on the cover art/packaging?

Just look at this beauty! Washed from colors, depressing with only Jimmy on the cover while the rest of the band is seen in the side mirrors. The cover speaks for itself. The first time I saw it I just felt I was up to listen to something good and damn, I wasn't wrong. I love the cover so much that I would be glad to have it as a poster in my room. I'm not joking, I even saw a similar big flag to buy and if I had money and space in my room for it, I would buy it - this album is my religion <3

4. Are any of the tracks important/meaningful to you? Why?

Oh God, the whole album is important, but if I have to narrow it to a few songs... I will talk about very personal stuff here.

"Cut My Hair" Now this is like an opening track to the beginning of the story, to see how Jimmy feels emotionally, but the tone and the entire setting of how his life looked, now that is what brought my attention right from the beginning. The guy just doesn't fit in, feels like an outcast and this verse right there:

Why do I have to be different to them? Just to earn the respect of a dance hall friend Have the same old row again and again Why do I have to move with a crowd Of kids that hardly notice I'm around? I work myself to death just to fit in

It reminds me of my days when i tried to fit in the society I live in. Now, I literally don't care how other see me, but I can see that with my clothing, interests, way of thinking I just don't fit in and I probably never will. But I gave up on "moving with a crowd" long time ago. And from here, my dear friend, things started rolling.

"I'm One"

This one is a simple matter, first verse bringing this in:

Every year is the same And I feel it again I'm a loser - no chance to win Leaves start falling Come down is calling Loneliness starts sinking in

Describing the loneliness Jimmy feels is very personal. I might not show it, but I'm a really lonely person, not being able to find the second half, searching for some understanding on that matter. I have the luck to have my mom who understands me because she was going through the same, but ya know. It ain't the same as having a boyfriend. Plus I just love how the last three lines of lyrics in this verse creates that autumn vibe <3

"Drowned"

Just because of the general tone and a call for freedom. The only ones truly free in this world are birds, we as humans are not. This chorus:

Let me flow into the ocean Let me get back to the sea Let me be stormy, let me be calm Let the tide in and set me free

Speaks exactly about it. Just to be free as the ocean's waves, it just sounds so nice <3

"Love Reign O'er Me"

I see this song as a call/prayer for love, for some understanding and affection. On top of that, it's also the emotional conclusion of the whole story, chaotic one, but so good to listen to every time. I think the most beautiful verse in this song is this one:

Only love can bring the rain That makes you yearn to the sky Only love can bring the rain That falls like tears from on high

I had the luck to discover this album and get first stage obsessed with it after watching a documentary talking about Keith Moon's death. I had the luck to fall in love with this song at that time and this verse which I quote here is exactly how I felt back then about it. Doesn't mean I feel differently about this song now, oh no, actually this song is the most meaningful to me from the few I've mentioned. I will sound insane now, but lonely heart searches for replacements and mine found such a one in this lunatic. Yep, I'm in love with Keith Moon. Can't help it, just like I can't help it but connect this song somehow to this weird situation.

5. When did you first hear the album?

UMN... September last year, I'm sure of it. Second The Who album I've listened to, wait a bit. ...23rd of September actually (month after Keith's birthday, can my discovering of The Who and him somehow become even more weird?). I had this album wrote down to listen to later after discovering "5:15" by accident as I've described above. I remember this day clearly.

I was fresh after lunch, excited actually just by seeing the cover. Listened to it once and then it went on repeat. I had to listen to it three times to have enough for one day. And it played for the entire week without breaks. This was just the beginning of my obsession with it tho XD

6. Have your thoughts on the album changed since you first heard it?

Yep they did. From first: "This is great" to the now "Favorite album of the 70s" I had like three stages with this one.

First stage obsession was the first week that it played each day.

Then came the second stage at the beginning of this year, just after I've watched the movie.

To then come to the third stage when I'm playing this album whenever I feel bad or songs from it are stuck in my head. A religion, you should understand XD

7. Are you a fan of other works by the artist/in the genre?

Of course! I will not rank The Who's albums here, but every single one of them has something good in it. Every single one is somehow different. I don't know how did they pull this off, but they did and OH am I so glad for that!

Also, I can kind of call myself a fan of Pete Townshend, especially if it comes to lyrics, I fucking adore how he writes and honestly I can't wait to have free time to get to his solo albums <3

8. A lyric you like from the album

I actually talked about this one in The Who ask, but here, a fragment from "Bell Boy":

Some nights I still sleep on the beach Remember when stars were in reach Then I wander in early to work Spend my day licking boots for my perks

Love Keith's soft voice in this one, I adore it. There are no words that could describe what I feel when I hear him there.

9. How did you discover the album?

Like I've said, through my mom's mistake, but it was a day after I've listened to "Who's Next" that I went to see other songs by The Who and "5:15" started playing randomly. I recognized it immediately and I wrote down the name of the album, just to give it a listen a few days later.

10. Do you own/would you like to own a physical copy of the album?

I don't own a physical copy of it, but I want it, I really want it at home. It's as important to me as getting "Help!" and "Abbey Road" by The Beatles and those two were a must at home. Same with "Waiting for the Sun" by The Doors. All three mentioned are at home already, "Quadrophenia" has to be here as well.

But I will say this. I will feel sorry for my neighbors once I get it. I can't play the three tracks quietly, let alone the entire album XD

#thanks for asking!#this was a lot of fun!#ask corner

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