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potatotrash0 · 3 years

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Hey idk if youve done this alreadh but im curious about your body headcanons for the sdr2 cast!! An anon sent some in for characters previously (the one where they said things like angie has vitiligo and stuff-i love them and they really stuck with me haha) and i wanna know your headcanons!! :D

Hmhmm this one I might be listing off the spot lmao. I feel like my hcs are mostly just. Common hcs but hey I never said I wasn’t basic skdjksjdks

cw for. Everyone. Yeah kdjfksjdks

Hajime…..I like to think he’s slightly buff? Maybe that’s not the right word. Toned? Idk, I hc that he jumps around hobbies a lot because he wants to find something he’s good at, so that includes sports. I like the idea that a few stick with him, like swimming and basketball. I imagine he also has light scrapes and scars on his legs from falling, both with skateboarding and general Clumsy Shit.

Also this one switches a lot but with Trans Hajime, I can see him with top surgery scars.

Oh ah, I like freckled Hajime!! It’s cute. This one goes with the sports hc, but I like the idea that he’s kinda tanned. Entirely unrelated but I also like the idea that he has calluses from playing guitar.

Chiakiii!! She’s soft bc I said so. Specifically her thighs, arms and stomach + some stretch marks. And moles all over. Projecting big time onto a cute fictional girl, call that self care <333 /j

uhh other than that, I imagine she has bags under her eyes from staying up late gaming. Also tan Chiaki my love. Shh I know she probably doesn’t go outside for days on end. In my defense I tan easily and I imagine she does too. Again with the projection. Shhhh

Oh oh!!!! I forgot to mention but!!!! Chiaki gets a ton of moles. I saw the boob mole and went !!!!!! fellow mole haver!!!!!! and went nuts. This is the one weird niche entirely irrelevant thing that can get me to like a character, just. Being able to point at them and jump up and down with joy over them also having moles. Idk why it’s just therapeutic <33

Nagito’s bony. Skinny mf. Could probably cut cheese with his elbows. Maybe grate it on his collarbones. Cuddling with him would be a fight to see if you can find a position that doesn’t end with something poking you in the gut. I mean this affectionately, he’s bony as shit but he’s my bony fucker <3

Pale asf, sunburns if he’s in the sun for more than two minutes. His eye bags could hold the entirety of his life’s trauma. Sharpest features ever. Sometimes I hc that he looks greasy, and other times I hc that he looks ethereally pretty in a ghostly way. Either way he always looks like he’s had the soul sucked out of him by a Dementor.

You can probably definitely see the veins in his hands. They’re. Very There. Also I’ve brought this up before but he definitely has big ass hands. L a r g e hands, all the better to head pat you with. This was originally so much more pining but I decided no I’ve exposed myself enough on this blog skfjksjdkd

Oh last minute thing, I think he’d be tall as fuck. Specifically 6’0 or taller. Also he probably (definitely) has at least a few scars from his childhood, particularly that plane crash. And I like to think he has glasses when he’s older. I’m so sorry that his section is so long I have so many thoughts about him ;;;;;

Okay uhh Imposter? Mmm. Idk actually. I do think they’d have callused fingers but soft hands. Probably from having to adapt to using a ton of different talents for their Imposter Agenda. Also stretch marks probably, all over their body.

Teruteru uhhhhh. God. Can you tell I don’t think about some characters ;;;;; Idk I don’t have much that differs from canon. I like him. Oh but he probably has cook hands? Chef hands, whatever you wanna call them. Probably faint scars from cuts and burns from when he was still learning how to cook from his mama.

Mahiru……hmm well freckles obviously dkjfksjd. I think she’s tanned as well since I feel like she likes sunlit shots. Idk I don’t have much. I like to think she’s got a stockier body type though.

Also not necessarily her body but I like her with an undercut!

Peko’s buff <3 it’s canon <333 /j

N ee way yeah. Buff Peko my love. Also she probably has a few scars from handling her sword when she was younger and less experienced. I also feel like she would have contacts she wears when she trains bc fuck exercising with glasses

I don’t really have anything for Hiyoko until she gets her growth spurt. Afterwards, I imagine she’s tall and kinda thin? Mainly bc of fast metabolism probably, though when she’s older maybe she’d be a little less spindly.

I don’t know if her hair would be bleached or not, but if it were, I like the idea of her letting her actual hair color grow in. If not, I think Ibuki might help her try a few sections of dyed hair? Idk I just like the thought

Ibuki is a fellow bony bitch. I mean this lovingly. She’s skin and bone. Skeleton rocker lady

Probably tan, I imagine she spends a lot of time in the sun. She strikes me as a summer person. Oh, I also saw some art of Black Ibuki with vitiligo and loved that!! Also calluses from shredding guitar, obviously

Hmmm I like the idea that she rollerskates? So possibly some bruises or scars on her arms or legs from falling on concrete when she was still learning. Oh oh I imagine she has a ton of piercings!!! On her ears, nose, lips, brows, tongue, belly button…….maybe she has a split tongue too idk. Also she totally gets a ton of tattoos when she’s outta Hope’s Peak, prove me wrong.

Mikan uhhh. I like tall Mikan. She deserves the height. 5’8 to 6’0 Mikan good 👍

Hmm she probably has scars all over, particularly on her arms and legs. Uh. Idk I imagine she’s curvy probably. What do I say for her I don’t have anything skjdksjdks

I’m not even gonna lie I don’t have a damn thing for Nekomaru. Or. Wait nevermind here’s a concept: buff Nekomaru but like. If you’ve seen those wrestlers who have fat on them that hides some fucking crazy strength? Yeah that’s him. Also hairy asf.

Gundham……tall vampire vibes. I’d say he’s a stick but also I feel like he’s the slim type of muscular. Idk how to describe it. Shigaraki type muscle? Male gymnast. No nevermind those guys have visible muscle. Shigaraki type it is

Hmmm I think this is canon but probably a few scratches from his pets. His arms and legs mainly but I’m sure the Devas have scratched up his neck at some point or another. Just a little though. Also piercing fiend Gundham my beloved. I also like him having a couple tattoos when he’s older. Ibuki probably helped him heheh

I’m torn between Fuyuhiko being skinny as shit and Fuyuhiko being tiny and buff. I like both………hhh

His hair is probably bleached. Peko probably helps him re-dye it when his roots start growing in. I also like him having glasses

Uhhh tooth gap Fuyu’s cute. I used to have a super small one before I got my braces, I imagine it’s the same for him. Him, Ibuki, and Gundham are probably Tattoo Buds.

Kazuichi…..I want so bad to say he’s a weakling just to make fun of him but he’s a mechanic that probably works with heavy machine parts a lot and he probably has some sick biceps. But he probably also smells like hair dye, oil, metal, and Monster Energy. Win lose situation I guess.

I like to think he has a couple piercings? Not as many as Ibuki, but maybe he’s got like. Second or third place in the class. Also he totally filed his teeth to be sharp like that

Akane!! Buff lady, could probably deadlift me or something. She’s definitely got some scars from running around, especially when she was first learning parkour. Ummm oh, I like to think she has a chipped tooth or smth like that from falling roughly as a kid.

Soniaa <33 in my heart she will always be tall and have at least some muscle. Novoselic is a war country if I remember correctly, she’s definitely got some military training in her.

Idk why but her with heterochromia just popped into my head. That pretty greenish blue gray that she has + maybe brown or hazel? I think that’d be cool. And hip dips.

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yarrowleef · 3 years

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Read Darkness Within all in one sitting last night and then passed out so here are my scattered thoughts i wrote down as i read, (afterthoughts in parenthesis)

Darkness Within Spoilers, obv

UGH GOD THE SECOND HAND EMBARRESMENT FROM SQUIRREL FAKE FLIRTING WITH ASHFUR IT HURTS

Just remembered Sandynose died and got a small boost of happiness (will Hawkwing and Plumwillow ever be allowed to talk again now? I mean probly not b/c they aren’t protags and non-protags don’t rly have friends but I can hope. Sorry, Hawkwhing and Plumwillow’s short-lived friendship in Hawkwings Journey was one of the last times I felt something)

Ghost fleas lol

Mothwing: i’m rude now. (but more importantly, Fuck Tigerheartstar for forcing his son to be around the cat that hurt him so badly, like he HAS to know how upset everyone is regarding Shadowsight and his accidentally helping the imposter, and he’s making him be the sole one to tend to him??? There is NO REASON Puddleshine couldn’t have done it. You think Puddleshine is going to try and murder someone?? )

Oh no don't make this a traveling book, and a ROOTBRISTLE traveling book this is going to be insufferable

BACON AND EGGS

Lightleap Is Good (Hey didn’t Shadowsight have another sister? lets be real we all knew Pouncekit was going to end up as the forgettable 3rd one)

Bristlefrost’s crush continues to feel unnatural to me. It’s like she’s grasping at straws romanticizing the most generic things.....wow....I love how ur just so...bare minimum competent....being polite to the loner we came all this way to ask for help like any somewhat reasonable person would....How admirable...I love the way you just *clenches fist* exhibit some basic traits of loyalty and skill that literally every warrior has (I s2g I’m this close to head canon-ing Bristle as a clueless aromantic who doesn't understand what romance is actually suppose to feel like so she just looks at feelings of low-bar admiration and assumes “oh I guess this is that “romantic attraction” everyone’s always talking about? guess I must be in love???” because both her crushes have felt out of nowhere and like. Idk fake/forced sounding like she’s just telling me that that she’s In Love Now while I continue to not actually feel it at all from her end. I know it’s just that I hate the way Erin’s write female characters in love but this head-canon makes me laugh)

Got scared because I thought they were going to villainize Spotfur for not wanting kits for a minute, but also excited at the concept of maybe exploring a female character that doesn’t want to be a mother, but it turns out she was just pulling a Sparkpelt and actually DID want the kits all along and was only hesitant because she’s sad. Shrug oh well. (the only female character in warriors that was distinctly upset about pregnancy and motherhood was Lizardstripe and as we all know she was eeeeeevil and abusive and “overly ambitious” because why else would you not come around to being happy about motherhood?? YES I’M STILL SALTY ABOUT YELLOWFANG’S SECRET, BAD BOOK) Whatever it’s fine so long as Spot doesn’t lose her rebel leader spirit forever and default to “soft mom” personality for the rest of her life, I gotta have hope because I actually like Bristle and Spot’s current relationship. Also I am actually very grateful they never made Bristle resentful at Spot for getting with her crush, as lots of middle grade/YA media has a very bad habit of demonizing female romantic “competition” and its super gross, so I rly do like that Bristlefrost is so protective and caring towards her instead. )

This series is trying to tell me that Rootspring is actually Big but I refuse to accept that. he has dumb scrawny bitch energy and we all know it

Sunrise: “Thunderclan may be better with a new leader” lol go off (i mean........they right tho...It’s unfortunate that the tension in this whole plot is a bit dampened by the fact that i DO in fact want bramble to die v badly. I don’t even have special hatred for him, I’m just bored of him.)

Yes Lionblaze beat the shit out of Ashfur

*HOLY SHIT THAT’S FUCKED!!!! (I wrote this in reference to the ghost summoning scene, this was all I could manage at the time, that scene was WILD and I am VIBING WITH THE HORROR OF IT ALL)

* Brashfur: Oh yeah? Could Ashfur fake THIS? *stands up with slightly better posture* Shadowsight: oh damn you got me there...... (asdfhhfhhgh im sorry that was really funny, how did that prove anything?? ONLY A ~REAL~ WARRIOR COULD STAND UP STRAIGHT WE ALL KNOW ASHFUR IS INCAPABLE OF GOOD POSTURE!)

End of the book: *LAUGHING NERVOUSLY* WHAT THE FUCK??? (I thought he was just gonna kill Squirrelflight right there holy shit can you imagine the RIOTS that would ensue in the wake of all this Squirrel/Bramble discourse I was so scared for a second.

But it’s fine, she just....went to super hell instead......Warriors has come so far lmao WHAT IS HAPPENING

Final Notes:

*On Mothwing, I don’t think her behavior struck me as “CHARACTER BUTCHERING” as much as it did for other people? I mean.....Warriors fans will say that literally any time a character does ANYTHING less then perfectly nice I think her actions just seemed that much harsher because we are reading from Shadowsight’s POV, and Shadowsight is taking everything 10x more personally right now (understandably so, but Mothwing isn’t inside his head) she wasn’t trying to hurt him. Also... like... Shadowsight DID get his name too early. It’s not Mothwing’s job to put his feelings above everything else, she’s not even his mentor, Puddleshine on the other hand, as his main mentor, I don’t understand what his deal is ignoring Shadowsight, that’s not how you help an apprentice but I suppose I chalk many of his mistakes up to also not being the most experienced medicine cat (he barely even had his own mentor.) Maybe he’s distant because he feels guilty and actually blames himself for not guiding Shadowsight better?? the two of them haven’t communicated about it yet so idk

any way I give Mothwing a pass to be a little short tempered right now as a cat who has had her abilities periodically questioned all her life no matter how hard she works or how much experience she has, just because she doesn’t vibe with the spiritual cult side of the clans, I can understand why she’s a bit defensive of being questioned and frustrated watching so much hurt happen Yet Again due to reliance on StarClan visions over common sense, and I for one still stan her for slandering StarClan and refusing to accept Mistystar’s bullshit banishing like everyone else. Sometimes a character is at the end of their rope and can’t manage to be 100% nice 24/7 and that’s maybe not inherently bad writing? idk just my hot take. At a certain point we all gotta reckon with the fact that our perception of most popular supporting characters in heavily colored by fanon and we can’t always get mad at the authors for not adhering to it

*The sisters magic shit is my fav worldbuilding warriors has had in AGES, I love the way it’s described and it actually feels like it adds something to this world. I love this horror imagery with the ghosts, very excited for that.

*still won’t be thrilled if Ashfur is working alone, because his motive doesn’t make sense right now. I mean the trying to get Squilf thing, sure, whatever, but the “I will make everyone pay for what they did to me”???? cause like?? Who??? they didn’t do anything to him?? Ashfur’s grievance was very specifically JUST Squilf. He has no other cause for revenge, he had no other beef or complaints about the clans to my knowledge? The cat that killed him is dead, and she’s like, the only other one that I could see as having “wronged” him?? I guess he also didn’t like Firestar much according to Graystripe’s Vow (and on account of how willing he was to kill him w/ Hawkfrost) but Firestar is ALSO dead. I don’t understand his angle. Will have to see last 2 books to judge i suppose.

*All in all I am interested to see where this is going!! but also the pacing as I feared is becoming a major issue. It’s better then ending the main conflict on book 3 like Vision of Shadows did, but omg. Hardly anything happened in all these pages. I realized I was over half way through and nothing about the situation had actually CHANGED or advanced at all in all that time. Similar to the past 2 books which I believe could have been combined, this plot felt like it should have been the first half of a book. Discussing whether or not to kill the imposter isn’t much of a standalone plot, it’s just the set up to a plot. Finding the sisters didn’t need to be a whole long thing, the debates about the Imposters fate didn’t need to be repeated 10 times, all those chapters illustrating that “Shadowsight is sad” were also drawn out, repetitive, and interchangeable, we probably only needed 2 or so chapters showing his struggles to get the necessary information across. It felt like a lot of padding, it was really slow and I did a lot of skimming. I am still very interested in the overarching plot and mystery behind the ghosts so that kept me reading but man this “will they won’t they kill him” plot did not justify it’s own whole book. Alas this is a persisting issue that will never be resolved while they continue to force 6 books into 1 series that doesn’t need 6 books. I’m sure the writers are doing the best they can with these unfortunate constraints but still, it’s a wonder this slow padding isn’t more of a detriment to their younger readers that the books are supposed to be marketed to.

#warrior cats #the broken code #darkness within #the darkness within #darkness within spoilers #wc tbc #tbc #is that enough tags #yarrow speaks #wc criticism #long post #the broken code spoilers #warrior cats spoilers

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selfcareparker · 3 years

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yesss the letter format 💝💓💘💖💞💕💖💞💓 (lovely anon)

my dearest aria (a hamilton reference lmao),

i’m home alone (bc i wanted the house alone to get my head together after my brothers were mean to me 🙃) and i’m so hype LMAO but i’m watching chloe x halle’s tiny desk concert and honestly just vibing. (this is so random) besides zendaya like they are my badass black women role models. my one accomplishment would be to learn to body roll like them LMAO

oh nevermind i can’t have anything nice, my dad just came home 🙃 WHAT A WAY TO START OFF THIS ASK WTFFF

i’m liking tfatws, the second episode was veryyy intense imo but WANDAVISION IS SO GOOD😭 i knew it was going to be my favorite from the really old trailer but it’s really good and i promise it’s not just sitcoms, girl especially cuz you’ll have all the episodes already out- we were having to wait every week😭 BUT ITS SO GOOD I PROMISE HDJSHDJSH lmao reading this i was like “i- the episodes aren’t an hour long” but i feel that, it’s hard for me to watch tfatws bc they are an hour long and i’m like 😐 but wandavision episodes are less than 30mins bc I KID YOU NOT they have the damn 10 MINUTE CREDITS DHDJSJ no i don’t think we’ve talked about this b4 lol but it all depends on the series for me. i binged love island uk in less than a week bc i was so invested and LITERALLY LOVE IT but uh those episodes are like an hour and a half, but say i was binging tfatws (it’s so hard to type that ohmigosh) i honestly would not be able to do it bc of the intensity (you may be like what intensity but if you’ve seen episode 2 by the time you’re reading this.......... isaiah and the scene afterwards is all i have to say, esp me being black it was so tough :/)

girl you’re fine, as long as you’ve experienced it once hahaha i think the reason why it’s so important to my family (this letter feels so personal and extreme HSJSJA IM SORRY) is bc my grandmother loved it and in my family i guess it’s just important to us lol like my mom and dad love it too and we have the literal VHS tapes LMAO, but it only came up recently cuz my youngest brother was watching lion guard HAHA and he wanted to see the originals :) and fun fact (unless you already know) but there’s a lion king part 2 and 1 1/2 and i have all three ON VHS HAHAHA but i love lion king 1 duh (the og) but part two’s music and love story..... is so good. anyway. 🦁

I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING DURING THE WHOLE MOVIE THEATER ENCOUNTER THING HAHAHA AND WHEN SHE WAS SAYING AWKWARD I WAS LIKE WTF THE NOISE LMAOOOO i don’t think there’s a better way to describe that whole situation than ZKDHDJSHAJAJSHDJSNAHA. yeah. yeaaaa at the cinemas (i like the word cinema more than movies 🥰) here they have chips (fries), some have ice cream, nachos, drinks, hot dogs, the cinema we were at had pretzels and like BURGERS I WAS LIKE HUH OKAY and ya know obviously popcorn but i don’t know why the theaters (or cinemas) here do that, it started a long time ago though like yearsssss

PLEASE i have the longest movie watchlist and uhh haven’t seen any of them JDJSKA (istg i use HSJSSKSH as a period - like . ) i’m still hype for cherry but very hesitant (idk if i can handle it) but i’m thinking about watching it in the next couple of weeks? i know it’ll take me forever bc i’m gonna have to keep pausing and shit but idk. i’ve asked around for very specific trigger warnings and time stamps so i REALLY know what’s coming (even if it spoiled the film a bit for me) but i do really wanna see it (i think? writing this now i’m not so sure lol) so whooooooo really knows lol, but chaos walking YES i was really excited about it :))) and about my friend uhh dude you don’t sound mean at all i was literally thinking the same thing but worse HAAKL idk what she was there for???? she bought my ticket tho so 💁🏾‍♀️ whatever

“SIMS ahh, BUNK BEDS ahh” had me cracking up lmao and you know my sims status JAJAHHAJ but i’m gonna become like you, saving every 5 minutes 😭 but that’s exactly what happened to me, i really didn’t know whether to shut it off or not but after 2 hours i was heartbroken lol i’m literally making a list of things i need to redo that wasn’t saved lmao

CAN I JUST SAY UR A MASTERMIND THOUGH??? UR SIMS GAME SOUNDS SO *chefs kiss* IM CRINE university is PAINFULLY long and LITERALLY I FEEEL THAT like you can’t do anything else without failing, i had my sim go to a party once for like a few hours and i felt so dumb afterwards like urgh he should’ve been studying LMAOO just cracking down on work honestly. UR NEIGHBOR!AU IN THE SIMS PLEASEEE i am very much in love with it, yes. (pouring rain has just suddenly begun where i am rn wow ok) i love that you put them on the same lot, that was really really smart and i love that ur living out your sexuality in the sims😭 i was abt to say “now you can say you’ve got experience bc of the sims” but ANYWAY IGNORE ME fhdhs THE ALIEN BABY DHSJSK i hope it’s not a dealbreaker for enisa. that’d be tragic. IM BACK IN UPPERCASE THO BC YES MAKING OUT IN THE SIMS IS SO HOT TO ME??? I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE STFU OH MY GOSH- all the stuff, whispering sweet nothings, and the making out, and JUST ALL OF IT!!! AM I TOUCH STARVED????? there was this time i made my sim just continue to woohoo bc it was turning me on big time. ANYWAY

half way through that i had to go to my grandmothers house (not the one that likes lion king, but uh hmm idk if you remember but i was talking abt my shit family so yeah that grandmother lol) so now i’m finishing this 🥴 and instead of chloe x halle i’m watching a tom interview lmao & if this takes me longer than 30 minutes.... imma cry

I REALLY WANNA ASK- IS IT BC UR GERMAN LIKE YOU CAN JUST WRITE OUT THAT LONG ASS WORD???? i mean i can’t write out supercalafrag- anyway, but that word is a bit nonsense, UR WORD IS A REAL WORD DUDE HDJSHS i love how ur like “maybe i mixed up these words” YEA OK.

lol i had to google what are waveformers lol (lol makes a comeback) and they look like curlers that you would sleep in (here we would call them curlers or uhm i forgot uhhhhhhh rollers i think) but ur fine when am i ever making sense?? i think the best part about these is the chaos yet we understand what the other means 😌

H20 H20 H20 OH MY GOODNESS SHE BROUGHT UP H20 OK MY LIFE WAS H20🥲 I HAVE THEIR LOCKET NECKLACE AND (short storytime) when i was younger i thought they were american despite their accents (idk i was dumb) but then i figured they weren’t when lewis went to go study in america HAHAH ALSO FAVORITE COUPLE CLEO AND LEWIS UGH WATCH ME REWATCH THE SHOW NOW THANKS (also i hated elizabeth so much) but anyway back on topic, when lewis went to go study in the US i looked up where the show took place and all that good stuff and i found out they were australian HAHAH and that started my obsession with accents LMAO the uk :’)) (i’m proofreading AND AUSTRALIA IS NOT A PART OF THE UK LMAOO IM SOO DHSJSSHS) also it is now one of my many goals (besides the body roll HAHAH) to go to mako island (that’s what it’s called right??)

about music, i googled stormzy and i might listen to a song of his.. LOL I WANNA GIVE IT A TRY IMMA DO IT FOR YOU NFDVSFSG lmaoo the german rapper had me cackling (autocorrect once again being helpful and said raper and i’m like nOO) i mean we all have that one person. can’t lie, won’t lie. my one (IM SORRY BUT AUTOCORRECT HAD “MY ONE TRUE ACCOMPLISHMENT” SITTING AND READY HDJSJA I DONT EVEN TYPE THAT wHAT) person out of my white soft boy with brown hair and brown eyes type would beeeee pete davidson. love me some petey. i was gonna say rex orange county as well lmao but i don’t really loveeee him i’m just in love with his music... and wanna be friends with him..... so 👉🏾👈🏾 (i never do that fdshsh)

oh my goodness, i love tattoos too- GASP what are you thinking of getting 🥺 i want tattoos too but i’m too indecisive to figure out what to have & where. especially in my family... idk they aren’t frowned upon but my mom’s not applauding the thought lol, if i got one it would have to be meaningful but i am absolutely in love with (for example) ariana grande’s finger tattoos !! they’re so cute and simple :’) i don’t even know if i can get tattoos? my skin is... interesting. not in a bad way!! just like.... idk how to explain it??? keyloids run in the family & i got a piercing once and it got infected soo :/ the doctor also confirmed that if i wanted tattoos they couldn’t be in color so LMAO

ONCE AGAIN THIS WHOLE THING FEELS SO TMI DHSHSSJ IM LIKE OHMIGOSH SHUT UP SHE DOESNT CARE JESJSKS

in regards to you not sleeping, i wanted to mention that dumb bird, what was the reason it was up so early aT 4AM???? SIR WHO YOU CALLING TO??? also it’s 11:30pm and idk why i’m tired???

yeah i was never SUPER into justin so i don’t know exactly what albums you’re talking about lol, i do know yummy though.. but everyone did hahaha also i listen to so much pop 🙈 i mean maybe... idk what would count as pop and what wouldn’t. that new person feeling though.. i get that. it’s like who is this new person..? i kinda feel like that with taylor swift (i was never THAT into her either though so it’s like oh wait i didn’t know you from the beginning instead of hello old friend but you’re different lol)

about the concerts, thanks 🥰🥰 that’s so sweet what you did for your mom too, it’s nice seeing them so happy like 🥲 awh AND GLEE IS AND WAS MY LIFE FOR A V V LONG TIME, i’ve been meaning to rewatch it for the longest time lmaooo but i’m just so lazy and it’s such a commitment... i’ll have to get emotionally involved again and idk if i want that rn. but i have a friend on instagram and she runs a glee fan account and it’s such a big part of her life i really don’t think i could ever be THAT obsessed with something. like another one of my friends loves tom holland so much that she changed her mom’s name in her phone to what tom’s mom’s name is in his phone (that was confusing lol) and obviously i’m not judging them AT ALL, it just couldn’t be me lol

CONCERTS LOOK LIKE SO MUCH FUN 😩😩 LIKE THE EXPERIENCE AND THE FEELINGGG URGHSJS i wanna see a few people live like ari and chloe x halle and- hmm.... idk who else FJDSJ rex orange county i guess huh anyway, the experience just sounds so amazing and the atmosphere is just ✨✨✨ yeah

aria do it do it do it do it do it- watch hamilton!! but with subtitles bc you won’t catch half of the things they’re saying without them LMAO (me and my family watched it and they all didn’t like it bc they didn’t know what was happening lol) BUT DONT WATCH IT AT 4AM LMAO ITS LITERALLY 3 HOURS LONG

yes!! superior peter fics 🥺🥺🥺🥺 and it just shows how much of an incredible writer AND PERSON you are through your fics that you can turn a blurb into 2k....... like what.

LMAO the annoying thing, sometimes i feel like i’m bothering people (like right now HAHAH) but i think it’s my antisocial side being like yeaa no one wants to talk to you like you wanna talk to them :’) idk it’s strange!! sometimes i get really ✨insecure✨ and overthink everything LOL like is this too long, im talking too much, i’m swearing too much, oh lord i’m a pain, all that good shit lmao so that’s fun:))

ALSO YOUR BLOG IS SO FUN TO ME HAHAK LIKE ITS JUST YOUR OWN AND I LOVE THAT!!! like you talk about everything and anything on here lol,, and i say that bc what you said lmao how if i was someone else i would want to fuck me so bad😭 i honestly don’t understand how i don’t have people lining up though..... but if no one’s gonna tell you... then you tell yourself, period (and sometimes telling yourself is fucking yourself HSHAJKS OK NEXT)

ohmigosh the realization you had that you graduated last year and are going to uni this year🤧 but the fact that you had a teacher who LEFT THE GROUP CHAT bc she was mad at y’all i- 😭 but yeah about your maths (i always wondered why you guys call it maths and the US calls it math. like i know so many people out of the states, not just in the uk that say maths) teacher- i saw this post that said online school is looking a lot like dora the explorer😭😭 “you have any questions?” 🦗 “okay bye then” lmao and please i love when tests have nothing to do with what you studied like ??? thanks? sometimes i get scared that my teacher will somehow find out that i googled everything? or like my answer is too close to the answer sheet or something. i get sooo nervous lol but i’m already past that point of not being able to do anything myself DHJS i mean i’m still learning like i said!! read the question, read the answer. boom. now i know the answer to the question and i learned!

THANKS 🙈🥰🤧 idk how else to explain my feelings LMAO i feel it’s cool that you find my dance lessons and voice lessons cool so thanks :’)

oh god not headache season 😭😭 allergies are the worst like it’s not even funny. is headache season just when the seasons are changing or is it like... all throughout the summer? cuz i love the summer lmaoo i love the winter too but i just love wearing as little clothes as possible LMAO

GIRL IF THAT BIRD DONT STOP CHIRPING- i am 100% convinced that it is the same bird trying to give you headaches and no sleep and it needs to stfu 😤 and pLEASE ur theme is adorable and pretty and cute but also it just feels like you? idk if i’m explaining this right or if it’s bc i’ve been talking to you for a bit but it’s cute but not innocent in a way that i’m surprised that you write smut and- yeah, that didn’t make sense!! but ur new theme is gonna look pretty too and as long as you like it, it’ll be amazing🥰

yessssss the fact that megan is gonna be ur pfp YES JUST YES

edit: ok i just need to 🥺😭 sometimes u make me wanna cry cuz i feel like you’re just a kind person. i truly mean this, the fact that you celebrate yours & others stretch marks makes me so 🥺🥺🥺 i honestly don’t know anyone who has said they want need more stretch marks and it’s just all very lovely to me :’)) OKAY IMMA STOP BEING SAPPY

#yes my fake tags are back #by popular demand #aka me #and look i have actual tags this time! #i’m seriously craving water ice rn....... huh #but it’s past midnight and i fr fr want a snack #aw man #i wrote that last paragraph while doing my tags yes #and i hope you become responsible for that anon’s orgasm #assuming they had one #and i saw your response to the tom thing and yeaa when they only look like that for something and it’s like aw bae be yourself #i’m gonna shut up now and find a snack but goodnight!! morning?? IDK #IF THESE TAGS END UP AS ACTUAL TAGS I AM SO SORRY HAHAHA #alright proofreading done and i’m gonna go eat cereal

okay i‘m on my way to a driving lesson rn and afterwards i have a zoom uni thing, and then another uni thing lmao. but hopefully i can reply to this in between because i‘ve been dying to talk to you since i got this ask dldjds💘💘💘 (i really like this heart. i had a 💖 phase for a while and now it‘s 💘 (seems like a very romantic heart but.... it is what it is idk dkddj)

^okay that was literally all i wrote before my lesson lmfao. just had the worst driving lesson ever dbdvsnylkxsksj i think i‘ve gotten too used to being good at driving and now i‘ve gotten too cocky with it 🥴 anyway i‘ve had such a stressful day and overall week but tbh i‘m already feeling better bc i can (indirectly) talk to you <333

omg i went to chloe or halle (i don‘t remember who out of the two)‘s instagram the other day and found out that they are not twins alejeleksjsksj but yes oh my god their voices are literally angelic and i can‘t wait to see Halle as Ariel (Arielle??)🥰 and omg it‘s literally 2021 and we‘ve only had......... one(?) black Disney Princess like it‘s about fucking time (I might be forgetting someone, I‘m not too familiar with the new Disney films, but as far as I remember there‘s only Tiana right? (who is literally a frog for 3/4 of the film 😭😭) so yes i‘m here for it too😌😌😌 (obviously she‘s not a cartoon like tiana ekdlek but she‘s a disney princess you know what i mean ddkjdh)

pfkejdj i‘m already overwhelmed with my parents i can‘t imagine having siblings too 😭😭 (sometimes i wish i had siblings but then other times (like after reading what you wrote dksjj) i‘m glad that i‘m an only child lmao like your brothers being mean to you and i remember when you cried and he was just like 👁👄👁 ok. like i’m totally okay being an only child sksjsj———and he doesn‘t listen to music 🤧🤧🤧 (although i guess that‘s good for you because at least he can‘t annoy you by listening to loud music that you hate dmdn)

okay okay i might watch wandavision then??? I‘ll definitely let you know!!! and yes omg i‘m loving tfatws (that really is so fucking hard to type omg) but same i totally get what you mean, i‘m not used to watching action series at all and every episode so far has been like a little movie so i‘m glad that i didn‘t wait until it was all out cause there’s no way i could binge watch that lol) and yes last episode was really intense. i‘m glad that marvel are talking about racism because (from what i‘ve seen) they haven‘t been the best in that department, and i‘m really curious to see what they‘ll do in the next episodes (curious isn‘t the right word but excited isn‘t the right wort either, like i‘m excited but in a neutral way ? i‘ll shut up dslsksj i hate that german has so many words that you cant translate because theres a really good german word that describes how i’m feeling but i cant think of a good translation ugh)

okay i absolutely need to watch lion king (and part 2 and 1/ 1/2 dksksj) AND hamilton, i might even do it soon 👀

BURGERS AT THE CINEMA? EBEEISNDBEKSK i‘ll come to the US just to go and watch a movie lmaooo, i think all the popcorn sizes and drinks are bigger as well, i‘ll come and watch chaos walking with you 😌😌 does next week work?

and yeah i‘ve seen posts with specific time stamps and trigger warning for cherry too so if you haven’t looked on tumblr yet i’ve def seen some! (but ive also seen some on twitter and yeah- i mean idk youve probably looked on tumblr but yeah- then there’s also imdb which doesn’t have time stamps i believe but quite specific warnings, mostly without spoilers!)

Tbh i don‘t think i would have even considered watching cherry if tom wasn‘t in it... (i’m personally fine with most of the triggering topics/things like for some reason i’m just stoic when i’m watching the most tragic films ever dldldldlbut the plot just... idk if it‘s for me you know? just entertainment wise?).... and even with tom in it i‘m unsure skeldls, i‘d totally get if you decide not to watch it but let me know if you do i‘d want to hear your thoughts! <3

SKSLSJJ my sims both finally graduated!! i think i played sometime last week, and i literally got the achievement/notification that i‘d been playing with this household for 24hours.... and that was BEFORE they graduated dldjdldkdksjjs

oh no my tumblr broke and three paragraphs of me talking about sims were deleted 😭😭😭

WAIT NO I TOOK SCREENSHOTSSKSK because i couldn’t press save so i knew they might be gone okay okay okay i‘m a genius

*move out

oh no idk if the quality is too bad to read... idk how good your eyes are dkdkdjjd (also sometimes it will be really bad quality for some but not for others so i hope that the you can see the pics in a normal/good quality)

Okay let me continue

OMG THE ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL STUFF IS THE BEST PART ABOUT THE SIMS DIDLDKJIkdkj i kind of miss how in the sims 3 they would be making out basically lying on top of each other if they were on a bed— but in sims 4 when they‘re sitting next to each other and everything that‘s definitely hot too 😌😭 or with hot tubs dkdkdk how one sim climbs on the other sim‘s lap before they woohoo (i used to make them skinny dip in the hot tub and then make out and woohoo so they’re like naked on top of each other even if you can‘t see anything- en e waysss)

Dkdkdkdj so @ Rindfleischet.. blah bla. so it‘s basically just loads of individual words put together/connected and that‘s a really big part of german. so yesterday i had an online Einführungsveranstaltung for uni (like it was a zoom meeting where they just talked about general stuff about the uni and i was really anxious before, idk why, but it turned out absolutely fine so) and that words consists of the two words Einführung (introduction) and Veranstaltung (event) which are also two individual words but you can make a new word (Einführungsveranstaltung, so in english that‘s basically “introduction event“ lmao) by combining those two words. there are obviously some rules like you can‘t just combine random words in a random order but you can basically make infinite words (technically). for example (i feel like i‘m teaching a class just skip this if you don’t care 🙃🙃🙃djdjdkdlns)

for example i could say Einführungsveranstaltungsteilnehmer (which is not underlined with red by tumblr because it is a grammatically correct compound word (i think that‘s what they‘re called?)) which is the words introduction + event + participant, so that word just means “participant of an introductory event“ but instead it‘s one word? i hope that makes sense? dkdkkdksks i mean it makes sense in german but idk if it makes sense to you cause idk if i‘m explaining it very well lmao,

(I just deleted a really really long paragraph that i wrote about gender in the german language and grammar, you‘re welcome slsksksj)

my capacity to think has now been used up for the week 🥴🥴🥴 i absolutely do not blame you if you just skipped over that part or can‘t be bothered to (re)read my awful explanation edkflsksjdjdj (again, i had double the amount of words but i just deleted it dkdkdlslsl but what‘s left lf my german lesson is probably confusing enough already😭i‘m sorry🥴)

so to answer your question LEJDKSKJ: it‘s really common to have long words in german, words that are just word+ word+ word + word made into one long word. obv rindfleischetikettierung..... is a very extreme example and it‘s normally just 2-4 words made into one! So yup i think that comes mostly from german and talking german and growing up here and going to school here and everything dmdfnsksx

i think the best part about these is the chaos yet we understand what the other means 😌— YES. YES. Yes. I love that about us 😌😌🥰🥰/ I love us. Yes.

okay but your friend changing her mom‘s name into tom‘s mum‘s name (was that right? Dkdkdjh)—— so Justin Bieber once posted something where you could see that his Dad‘s number was saved as „Daddy Cakes“ (which, thinking back, sounds very weird ekejjej) and till this day I have my Dad’s contact name as Tata (which is serbian for Dad lmao), “Tata🍰“ in my phone because of it 😭😭😭😭🙃🙃🙃 it‘s not because of justin anymore like i‘ve just gotten used to it by now but at first i did it because of justin lol........ but nowadays i don‘t think i‘m THAT type of fan of anyone- like you know how people have fandom names (Justin‘s fans are the Beliebers, One Direction fans are Directioners (writing that hurt my soul💔💔💔)) and I wouldn‘t consider myself a fan of anyone like that. like even with tom i wouldn‘t call myself........ does tom even have a name for his fans??? Well if he does, I wouldn‘t call myself that. Like i used to be such a hardcore stan for any celebrity that i liked and now it‘s just... okay, i like em. (She says on her blog where she writes fan fiction about Tom Holland — WJDJEJDKELSKSKKSNSNDXB🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃)

Omg rex orange county!!!!!! I don‘t know that many songs like I‘ve only listened to the album pony, but i love it 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

thanks again for what you said about my fics/writing I‘m🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Pete Davidson Pete Davidson Pete Davidson I‘m-🥰🥰🥰🥰 and I can‘t explain why. But as blissfulparker said the other day (i don‘t want to tag her and make her read through all of this lolll) “I like my men when they look like they are on the brink of death 😍“ (or something along the lines of that) eskkejs okay pete isn‘t that bad, he looks quite good on some days but other days you‘re like... is this man alive? Like i don‘t want to be mean I love Pete so much The King of Staten Island is literally my favourite film ever (although it‘s not my #1 because of how he looks, but i mean he does look good) VUT ALSO

(Okay i was gonna look for a terrible picture of him but he really doesn‘t look as bad as people say??? like. i think he‘s hot. can‘t necessarily explain why. so that‘s that on that.)

i‘m not going chronologically right now (i just keep scrolling up to your ask and replying to whatever i see first sksksksh) so i might miss a thing or two that you said

Okay Stormzy, you really really don‘t have to dkdkdjd like i think you said you don‘t really listen to rap, and uk rap is a whole nother thing from us rap because of the accent i feel like??? (That sentence did not make sense) BUT if you‘re looking for a few songs that aren‘t like RAP rap, then I‘d recommend One Second (feat HER), Superheroes, Own it (which you might know?), ummm maybe the song Lessons?, he has a ton of Lion King references by the way dkdjdj for example in Rachael‘s Little Brother but that‘s like more RAP again if you know what I mean?😭 and it‘s also like 5 Minutes long and tbh i only started liking that song a year after that album came out lmao but Rachael‘s Little Brother is possibly my fav Stormzy song, then there is Shut Up which you absolutely need to listen to just for fun dldjdjd like it‘s just pure fun and also a little funny lmao, especially if you‘re not British (i imagine so at least) cause he‘s like shuTTTT up idk dldkdjdldkjdhdhfjfbfldlsksksks

Vossi Bop is one of his classics, and then maybeee - ok so there‘s Blinded By Your Grace Pt. 2 lmaoobdjsj it‘s very (Christian/) religious but i like it a lot even though i‘m not really Christian (at least not practicing or anything) so idk about your views on religion but i do like the song a lot just by like the sound lmao

Okay so again you absolutely DO NOT have to listen to any, especially not for me dlskdj but I really do recommend the songs Superheroes, One Second and Rachael‘s Little Brother (and all the other ones i mentioned but if you don‘t listen to a lot of his songs you should at least give these three a try <3333) also let me know some of your songs? 🥺 like i dont care who they‘re by but i‘d love to listen to some that you like and Recommend 🥰🥰🥰

Okay so skdjdjdjddhhddhdhjsk... I used to watch all of my series in German (like H2O) bc obviously they were on german tv so they were german- and i knew that most of these actors i saw on tv were american and i was always SO fascinated that they all learned german for this show??? Like I actually thought they were the people‘s real voices and that these English and American actors were learning german so they could re-record the whole ass show and do everything in german dkdkdldjdjjd... i swear I thought that until I was like 14 omg. And then the first time that I watched H2O in the original version i was sooo confused about their accents because to me all actors who spoke english were American?? I mean MOST of those shows are American so I wasn‘t completely off but yeah i was definitely caught off guard when I heard all of their Australian accents for the first time 💀💀😭😭😭

@ math vs maths, math actually makes more sense in my opinion. like you have the word mathematics, then the abbreviation would obviously be math... why would English people randomly add the s from the end??? Or maybe it makes more sense after all because it‘s like plural??? Now I‘m unsure dkdkdkdj but i do say maths because that‘s how i was taught to say it and i hear the word maths more than math but yeah dldkdjs i think math might even make more sense (okay i just tried saying math and maths is easier to pronounce but again tjat might just be me, oh god i‘ll stop talking about that disgusting thing (mathematics).)

not the crickets and dora LMAOOOSNSNSMDNBS yeah that teacher was... a lot. a lot a lot a lot didjjd but she kinda liked me so she always gave me good grades/marks but the people she didn‘t like..... ooft. OOF.

Fksksjsj idek about headache season like i just know that i get headaches from the sun and i‘m allergic to only one.. type of...pollen??? (I don’t understand the science of that whole pollen thing and idek if it’s called pollen in english i just know sex pollen from fan fics😔)and yeah we have this weird wind that makes a lot of people get headaches yeahd dkdkdj. i loved the i just love wearing as little clothes as possible LMAO lllioool i love that i really do. i always struggle so much in the summer cause i never have anything to wear. i feel like i buy so many new summer clothes every year but when i end up looking for an outfit i don‘t ever find anything 😭 (so i just go naked— lmao jk jk) but i‘m generally not the biggest fan of summer so-

OMG THIS FUCKING BIRD ISTG, okay the first time i heard it i went to sleep at like 5 am, so the next day i was like let me go to bed earlier so the bird doesn‘t keep me up, so i went to bed at 4 am (🥲) and THE BIRD JUST STARTED FUCKING CHIRPING SO LOUDLY, so the next day i went to bed at 3 am AND IT FUCKING STARTED AT 3 AM and it‘s still there 😁 every. night.

and since you said you‘ve gotten used to my theme and everything (idk where this transition came from😭) so tomorrow (2nd april) we have our... wait what‘s an anniversary but for a month.? I think month is like mensus in latin OK NO THATS DEF WRONG DKDKDJ wait

So Tomorrow is our... mensiversary💘💘💘💘💘💘 or at least from the first time you sent an ask. i couldn‘t find it on my tumblr anymore because tumblr is a bit of a bitch but i remember the first thing you ever sent (in an ask) was something lovely about my writing and i always take screenshots of stuff like that, and i found it in my gallery. and i took that screenshot of your ask on the 2nd of march so i‘m assuming that‘s when you sent it 🥰🥰 i feel like i‘ve known you for a week not a month like how is it a month already????? (i mean this in a good way lmao but i really can’t believe that its been a month wtf)

omg no you make me want to cry because i just love you so much 😭😭🥺 but about the stretch mark thing it‘s just.. it‘s not even me trying to empower other women (or anyone else who has stretch marks) to shake off these dumb insecurities that the patriarchy and capitalism have instilled in us— ok no it‘s definitely that too lmao. But i mean I‘ve always loved stretch marks, i‘ve just always loved loved loved them so much so it makes me genuinely sad that people don‘t like them. so yeah. i dont really know how to explain it lol, like i‘m not (only) hoping that people realise that hating your stretch marks is giving the men and the patriarchy what they want per se- (that made no sense) it‘s just because i love stretch marks and think they‘re beautiful and also sexy. idk dldkdjls and omg the fact that you called me kind 🥺🥺🥺 like i don‘t really have a goal in life or anything, but if i had to choose a ‘goal‘ in life it would just be to be kind. (i‘ll end this here otherwise i‘m gonna talk about being kind for 30 more lines—)

And please. Do not ever feel like you‘re annoying me or sending too much. never ever ever. I get so happy when i see that you‘ve sent me an ask. No matter if it‘s a long one like this or just a short one where you‘re saying something about a post that i reblogged or something. I love hearing from/about you and talking to you 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

P.S: i‘m so sorry for the tags you‘re about to read they make even less sense than this post, also i reached the tag limit dkdkdj but i said some butterfly tattoos look tacky... and the next thing i said was since we‘re already speaking about Ariana- I DID NOT MEAN THAT SHE WAS TACKY dldkdjsj, i meant since you already mentioned some of her tattoos lmao

#lovely anon #<3 #ALSO I LOVE YOUR TAGS SM DKDJDKDL #i definitely (accidentally) didn‘t say something about every single thing you said #but this is so long already and i don‘t want to force you to read even more of my shite dldkdjsj #(i dont day shite i say shit but sometimes shite sound funnier)#*say #omg its too mate to speak english what i meant was i‘m sire i forgot to adress some of the things you said but i tried my best iwjwskb #omg adress (address? lmao) sounds so negative i mean i‘m sure i forgot to reply to some things- also *late not mate loool #omg ignore my whole german lesson i cant believe i actually wrote all of that wtf #but it took me like 20 minutes so i don‘t want to delete it 😭#and omg i hope you got to re do everything that your sims game didnt save and that it all worked out the same #😭#I NEARLY DELETED THIS ASK WITJ MY ANSWER OH MYFUCKING GOD MY FUCKING HEART #also i realised i didnt say anything at all about uni but i dont have any news like that Einführungsveranstaltung (😭) I went to was literall #just about schedules and credits and boring stuff mostly lmao #oh and tattoos!!!! it sucks that you might not be able to get the ones that you want/get any :((((( but hopefully you can at least get some #that arent in colour? 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼#so my parents aren‘t that supportive either like they most definitely wouldnt pay for it (even though they pay for a lot of my stuff lmao)#but i think in the end they know that i‘m old enough and they can‘t stop me and they‘d accept it one day so they‘re definitely not THAT bad #maybe your parents will change their mind over time? :(#or maybe youll just get one one day and ig theyll have to get used to it lol #so i want a butterfly (thats the only thing that i‘m sure about) and there are a lot of butterfly tattoos that look really tacky #but speaking of her i actually really like ariana‘s butterfly! but idk if i want that much shading- i have a whole album with like 35 photos #of just butterfly tattoos lol- i‘ll stop here tho. ldkdkd #omg im rereading this all and it‘s so messy good luck dkdkkddl #my tags got messed up and idk how to fix it #wait did i reach the tag limit and you cant even see half of these? 😭😭😭#i‘m so confused about these tags why are they not in the correct order? 😭😭😭 ily snd i‘m so sorry for dropping this post on you none of it #none of it makes sense.

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mccnyoongi · 5 years

Text

buttercup ⇢ pt one

⇢ pairing: yoongi x fem!reader

⇢ genre: smut + slight angst

⇢ au: college!au, fwb!au, stoner!yoongi, assholeish!yoongi, fuckboyish!yoongi fwb to lovers trope

⇢ word count: 6k+

⇢ warnings: smut, honestly mostly porn, unprotected sex, recreational use of drugs & alcohol, dirty talk, praise, degradation, ridiculously excessive use of pet names, fingering, dom!Yoongi, unprotected sex, slight dumbification (whoops), hair pulling, creampie??, oral (f receiving), pussy slaping, reader has a thing for Yoongi’s hands because who doesn’t, reader and yoongi are both sarcastic and oblivious, this part is basically pwp.

⇢ synopsis: Min Yoongi wears leather jackets, fucks you like he hates you, spends most of his days on the wrong side of a blunt, and calls you the sweetest names when no one else is around. And you definitely aren’t falling in love with him.

⇢ author’s note: so yes, buttercup is being cut up into two parts thanks to a lot of my life getting uprooted this week!!! ill spare you the details but everything is really chaotic rn so im sorry this isnt exactly what i promised :( thank u for all the insane amont of love ive gotten so far. this is a pretty um... filthy piece of writing skfjsd and it’s definitely not perfect and id love to get better with everything i put out on here but i hope u guys enoy ily xx

If there was a magic lantern hidden somewhere on the campus of this university, you’d find it and your first wish would be to make it so that no one found out about this whole illicit affair you’ve been having with Min Yoongi. The secrecy was fun, sexy like you guys had a whole Mr. and Mrs. Smith thing going on. Or something. Your second wish would be to make his dick vibrate.

But then he just had to go and go down on you in a bathroom during a party at the Beta Tau Rho house, not even a month into the fall semester, knowing you wouldn’t be able to be quiet or subtle at all. And he was so smug about it too, the fucker.

You can still feel the embarrassment buzzing under the surface of your cheeks from when you walked out that bathroom door and a dozen frat boys and mutual friends of yours and Yoongi’s were out there, waiting for the two of you to emerge and giving you a round of applause when you did. Yoongi had just laughed and rolled his eyes before leading you to the kitchen to get the pair of you some drinks. He’s always been particularly good at brushing that shit off of his shoulder. You aren’t, but you’re pretty good at pretending.

Maybe you should have ended it all that night. Of course, you didn’t. You figured, hey, you’re young and in school so fuck making good decisions. Of course, the fact that no other guy has ever been able to dick you down nearly as well as Min Yoongi can is probably a huge contributing factor.

Sure he might be grumpy, and sarcastic, and he tries way too hard to look cool and nonchalant, but he’s also the first guy to ever make you squirt. And you’re pretty sure that the way he waxes poetic about your pussy would make even Shakespeare swoon. So maybe the pros outweigh the cons, but only just.

“I can’t believe you’ve been getting Yoongi dick for almost three full months and haven’t divulged every single detail and vein to me, you cold, uncaring bitch-” Jimin’s voice is far too loud for the student-run coffee shop the two of you regulared every Sunday; a tradition that Jimin always insisted upon. He loves his traditions almost as much as he loves destroying any personal boundaries between the two of you.

“Keep going Park, see if I ever buy your coffee again.”

“Don’t change the subject,” You can’t say you’re surprised that Jimin is reacting like this. Self-proclaimed ‘disaster bisexual,’ Jimin was one of the very first friends you made back when you were a shy, barely functioning freshman.

He actually introduced you to all his frat brothers, and a large number of the people you now call your friends. Including Yoongi, whose dick seems to be a reoccurring topic between you and… most people you know. Even if they weren’t at that dumb party, Jungkook made sure that every living being that stepped onto campus was aware of the newly found out fuckbuddies.

“We don’t keep anything from each other, Y/N,” He’s whining over his coffee now, full lips perched in that pretty pout that he regularly uses to his advantage. “I even told you about that time I puked on Namjoon’s dick in our second year!”

“Mmm, and I wish you hadn’t told me, Minnie-” The visual still haunts you, but Jimin has never had any predilections when it came to oversharing, especially not with people who have the misfortune of being his best friends. “‘Sides, I didn’t figure it was important, the whole Yoongi thing-”

“His dick, you mean.”

“Because it’s not like we’re getting married,” You carefully ignore him, a useful habit you’ve picked up three years into being his friend. “Just sex, remember?”

“So fucking what? You told me how you sucked Jeon’s cock in a movie theatre less than twelve hours after it happened-” You take a large gulp of your own iced coffee to busy yourself when the shameful memory is brought up. Not shameful because of the promiscuity of the act, no you’re an adult, thank you very much, but rather because of the boy you performed them on. Jeon Jungkook is now more of an annoying younger brother to you than anything. Not to mention he’s got a giant mouth that couldn’t keep a secret even if it killed him.

“Jesus you could’ve picked any other example-” You groan out as Jimin smirked, receiving the exact reaction from you he wanted. You think you’d have learned by now. “I’m sorry, okay? You big baby.”

“Hey, you’re on thin ice,” He points an accusatory finger at you and you have to fight the urge to smack it out of your face. “Now you have to make it up to me.”

You sigh- Jimin can really be exhausting when you’re only half a medium coffee in. “And how do you expect me to do that, Park.”

“Dick details, fucking obviously,” He says it like you’re a moron for even asking. And maybe you are. “Well details in general, I guess. You know, the basics; length, girth, does he make you call him daddy, is he good- I mean he must be un-fucking-real if you’ve been bouncing on it for three goddamn months, you whore.”

“I’m not giving you measurements, Jimin, I’ve yet to take a tape measure to it- and stop assuming everyone has a daddy kink just ‘cause you do.”

“Okay, vanilla bitch. You’re lucky I already know he’s got a monster cock from that time he streaked at that post-mid-term party next year.”

“Then why’d you even ask?”

“To see if you’d tell me the truth. It was a test and you failed.”

“I may be a college student but you’re gonna have to threaten me with a little more than a failing grade to spook me,” You roll your eyes playfully- there’s no real threat in his words, there never is.

“You’re right, I’m sure you’d much rather be punished by Yoongi, huh?”

..............................................................................

Watching Yoongi roll a joint, his long, slender and experienced fingers moving quickly and deftly, has always had this near hypnotizing-like effect on you. His apartment smells like weed, the scent never surprising and would almost be overwhelming if you weren’t so used to it by now. The sight alone is almost enough to make you wet. But you’re stronger than that- except for when you’re not.

Sexy hands aside, but unfortunately not on you, you’re thankful for his cannabis-related expertise because a) you can’t roll one yourself to save your life and b) despite normally reserving your consumption habits for parties, you feel like you deserve a fat one after the week you’ve had. What with, you know, the stress of having every student on campus knowing about yours and Yoongi’s torrid affair, thanks to fucking Jeon Jungkook. Brat. Plus incessant goading from both Jimin and your roommate, Irene- equally angry as Jimin about your worst kept secret- has only made you sink further into your insecure and paranoid thoughts.

The weed would help, you’d told yourself when your phone pinged with that much anticipated what’re u up 2? late night text from the raven-haired devil himself. Yep, it was the weed, the comforting blanket of getting high. And had nothing to do with the boy that was offering them. Not even his fat cock or magnetic pull he seemed to have on you.

“Alright, dove,” He says from his spot on his worn-out single-dorm couch- the names don’t tend to surprise you the way they used to. You kinda figured that the affection-starved Yoongi had just you know… gotten comfortable with the girl he had been fucking for the last couple of months. No big deal. Sure they made your heart swell and your panties dampen, but then it could be looked at as a positive.

He looks up at you from his spot on the couch, where he’s uncomfortably hunched over the table as he works and notices how you’re looking rather spaced out- not entirely rare for you. He’s used to the hundred-mile stare you tend to adopt when deep in thought, though it’s considerably less common for a sober you.

“Dove?” Nothing. “Y/N?” It’s the use of your actual name from his lips that finally grabs your attention. You finally turn your head to look at him, the glaze of deep thought finally leaving your eyes. An eyebrow quirks to let him know you’ve heard him, but his gaze remains piercing and unwavering on yours. “You need to stop worrying so much, dove.”

“That’s what the weed is for, Yoongs.”

“The weed? You’re just here so I can smoke you out then, huh? No ulterior motives, hm?” His tone is as dry and sarcastic as ever, qualities he had quickly become known for around campus. He shurgs “Fine. Just here to sesh. C’mere then.”

You scoot closer to his side of the couch, not even thinking twice before listening to him. His tongue is tantalizing as he licks the rolling paper, even if he doesn’t mean it to be. He’s almost always tantalizing to you.

“Don’t be grumpy. You invited me over,” Your words are softer than you meant, but your proximity to him makes you feel stilted. He was right, you really needed a smoke, more on edge than ever.

“Well, technically,” He starts, unlit, perfectly rolled joint now perched between his lips. He grabs at your legs before continued so that you were resting sideways on the black couch, legs strewn over legs, thighs touching thighs. “I invited the best pussy on campus over.” You crinkle your nose at his bluntness.

“Yoongi-” You scold indignantly and pinch at a well-toned bicep. “Don’t be an asshole, you asshole.” He grins despite the insult like he’d expected it. Or he’s revelling in it.

“You know I’m just fucking around, angel,” His arm tucks around your waist comfortably, pulling you even closer. “Tryna chill you out. I can tell when you’re all strung out. I know how you,” He pokes you in the middle of the forehead, still grinning, as you pout from being called strung out. “Tick.”

He really does, doesn't he? The thought is mildly terrifying, and you think that Yoongi might be too smart or his own good sometimes. When he’s not smoking himself into another dimension, that is.

He leans back into his seat, uncurling from around you to finally light up. A few sparks later and the room is fogging up with overly pungent smoke- the cheap smell makes you think that he probably bought it off of Hobi, too lazy to go any further off-campus than his own block of apartments to one of the nice but relatively affordable dispensaries. You crinkle your nose at the scent, grateful he’s too distracted to notice since he’d probably just tease you for liking the fancy shit more. At least you trust Hobi, and he lives only two buildings down from Yoongi. Truly an age of convenience.

A few passes, tokes, whatevers later, and you’re feeling substantially... floaty. You’ve completely relaxed, choosing to lie down rather than put the effort into sitting up, though your legs are still thrown across your equally high counterpart’s. What’s left of the roach is left to burn in one of many strategically placed ashtrays around the apartment, this one being on the living room table.

Yoongi has barely moved in the past while, head resting lazily on the back of the couch, black hair messy and his neck- which is somehow handsome to you- stretched out, and hands resting against your bare knees. You’ve barely paid him any mind, the silence nothing but comforting and easy.

Which is why you can’t help but jolt just a little in surprise when those hands, the hypnotizing ones you’re so obsessed with suddenly start creeping up your legs, halfway up your thighs, carefully kneading the supple flesh he finds there. He chuckles at your reaction, finally picking his up his head to watch you through heavy-lidded eyes. “Bet you’re extra sensitive right now, huh petal?” He doesn’t have to bet because he knows it’s true, knows how needy you get when you’ve smoked. And he loves it- it’s why he never makes you pay for any of the times he smokes you out.

“Fuck off,” You whine at his light-hearted teasing, but Yoongi just giggles- he fucking giggles- in response, hands still travelling the expanse of your thighs.

“Be nice,” His words are still jovial, but there’s a gruffness behind them that sends a shiver down your spine, despite the relative stuffiness of his living room.

“I am nice, you’re just a dick,” You pout- childish, but you can’t quite come up with anything more clever at the moment. The jab may be weaker than your usual quips, but Yoongi seems to have decided it’s enough to warrant a punishment of sorts, as he sends a quick slap onto your thigh. It’s certainly not the harshest hit you’ve received from him, it’s more playful than anything, but it’s enough to make you whine, not even noticing when your own hands jump down to grab at him and your now sore flesh.

His eyes take on a new sort of darkness, beyond the dilated pupils from the high he’s in the middle of as he grabs at your wrists, any assault you had planned halting in its tracks. His large hands that you’ve drooled over- figuratively and literally- many a time are big enough that he only needs one of them to hold both of yours steady. He uses his grip on you to yank you back up to a sitting position, where your noses almost touch and you can feel his breath fan across your lips.

“I told you, I know how you tick,” He lets his tongue swipe out to wet his lips, the act distracts you and makes you mimic it with your own tongue and lips. The smirk he gives you is all at once wicked and panty dampening. “Which means I know you like it when I’m mean. I know you like when I treat you like this, like my little slut,” The word makes you draw in a breath as your face reddens in humiliation and tension. “And- and I know you’re probably soaking through your panties right now, all over my couch. Making a fucking mess.”

It infuriates you to no end how right he is as your breaths come out shaky and uneven as you feel your pussy flutter around nothing beneath your shorts and panties.

“Aren’t you?” His tone doesn’t leave room for playfulness anymore, and you’re nodding dumbly before you can give it a second thought. “Good girl.”

He doesn’t give you any time to bask in the praise before he’s leaning in to capture your lips in a searing and sloppy kiss. He’s domineering even in the way he kisses you, teeth biting and tongue sweeping into your own mouth as he revels in the small sounds that escape you. His hands leave your wrists, freeing them so you can grip onto raven locks with a newly freed hand as his own wrap around your waist.

Every sense is filled with him, and it is all at once comforting and exhilarating.

He tugs and roughly manhandles you so that you’re properly astride his denim-covered thighs, your lips never untangling in the process. When your lips finally do come apart, it’s with a lewd sound and a gasp from your mouth. He’s still smirking.

“Gonna fuck you so good petal,” Yoongi has always been so blunt and unforgiving, whether in bed or out and it had been one of the things that first attracted you to him, besides his obvious good looks.

Before the two of you had even gotten together, when you were friends who didn’t fuck on the regular, you had even mustered up the courage to touch yourself to the thought of him speaking to you like this- your own fingers circling your clit and delving into yourself without abandon. You had only been able to imagine up a fraction of his sexual prowess.

Like the time only a few weeks ago you admitted to him in a foggy haze, high than you think you’d ever been. how you’d brought yourself to climax with images and soundbites of him flitting through your head. He’d immediately made you put on a show for him- recreating those nights, but this time with him sitting feet away from you and ignoring your pleas for him to touch you.

Right now, however, the only things keeping you grounded in reality is the feeling of the muscles in his thighs flexing beneath you, though nowhere near where you truly ache to be touched, and one of his hands brutishly tangled in your hair, pulling harshly so he can have easy access to your neck. Plush lips start soft, kissing and licking at the skin there, before his teeth join in, biting and sucking like he loves the taste of you (because he does).

“Y-yoongi-” You’re trying to keep the whimpers at bay, like maybe if you stop yourself from seeming so turned on so fast it’ll get him to fuck you faster. “C’mon, just fuck me already.”

“So demanding for such a needy bitch,” He has you squirming on his lap and you don’t know why you thought you had any power over him left. “Have you forgotten your place? Can’t think of anything else but getting fucked, huh?”

You nod in agreement, but find out he must want a verbal response when you’re met with a sharp spank to your ass that has you squealing and bucking into his lap. “Yeah, yeah Yoongi ‘m sorry, just need it.”

“I know, baby, I know, you can’t even help it when you get all messy like this, I know,” You can’t decide whether his words are sweet or patronizing when he coos at you like that, but either way he’s got you another pair of panties.

“Need you to fix it, Yoongs,” All pride is out the window when he’s got you like this, and you love pleading with him to give you what you want almost as much as likes making you beg.

“I will,” He gives you one more harsh bite to the junction of your neck and your shoulder that you know will blossom into a bruise just in time for your 10 AM class tomorrow and you hiss at the mingling of pain and pleasure. “Now fucking get up,” He pats lightly at your thigh twice at the order.

You’re in no position to disobey, and you know from experience that not listening to him will end up with a sore ass and no release in sight. You stand up on shaky, doe-like legs and he grins at the sight of you. He stands up with you, his lean form and strong stance making him look taller than he really is. Then his long fingers are pulling at what little clothing you have, stripping you of both your tank top and your shorts and your bra isn’t far behind. Soon you’re clad only in your panties while he’s still fully clothed in black form-fitting jeans and a plain white t-shirt. Thankfully he leaves his cliche, but devastatingly sexy leather jacket at the door.

He doesn’t make any move to undress at all and you hope to god he will eventually- you love seeing his honey-coloured skin covered in a thin layer of sweat as he fucks you into oblivion. But for now, he stays fully clothed and he roughly pulls you by your upper arm until he can bend you over the arm of the couch, panty-covered ass high and perfectly on display for him.

“God, you’re fucking dripping,” He taunts, fingers running over your pussy through the thin cotton, making you whine into the rough cushion your face is resting on. “All this from almost nothing, huh? You’re such a fucking slut for me, shit.” He sounds genuinely amazed by you and when you uncomfortably crane your neck back to get a good look at him you let out a proper moan. He must have stripped his shirt off when you weren’t facing him, because his chest is bare for you to gaze at, or you would gaze at it if you weren’t distracted by the hand that isn’t on you, which is lazily working over his cock, rock hard and aching through his jeans.

He smirks when he notices what’s grabbed your attention, knowing you’re only moments away from quite literally drooling on his pillows. “Is this what you want? Hm?”

“Ye-yeah your cock, Yoongi, need your cock,” Your face burns red and blood burns hot as the crude words leave your mouth.

“And you’ll fucking get it, dove,” The cute name contrasts the second harsh spank he lands on your ass and you moan at the delicious sting.

You think that he must be about to tear your panties off and sink into you, but that would be too predictable and Yoongi loves to keep you on your toes. Instead, he disappears from your line of sight, a dull thump coming from the hardwood as he drops to his knees, feline gaze now level with your cunt.

“Yoongi-” You’re whining again, and you even have to hold yourself back from stomping your foot childishly because, god, you just need him to do something.

And then he finally does- he licks a thick stripe, right from your clit to your entrance, still over your panties, and you gasp in surprise. He does it again, twice, three, four times until your hips are bucking and you’re whining because you need more, you need him to actually touch you and not be a giant fucking tease for once in his life.

“Be fucking patient,” He hisses out, but at least he’s finally rolling your underwear down your legs to toss them somewhere across the room. “Or I swear to god, I’ll hold you down just like this so you can’t even squirm while I get myself off all over your messy cunt,” His hand is running up and down your bare pussy as he speaks, spreading the wetness around, to your clit and your thighs and your ass and then back again. “And then I’ll send you home without touching you or cleaning you up, so you’ll have to take the subway home covered in my come and fucking trembling. So be fucking good.” At the last word, he lands a mean slap against your gushing cunt and you let out an embarrassing squeak.

“Shit-fuck- Yoongi, please, just-” You stutter through your words, needing to get them out, though you don’t know why. “I’ll be good, okay? ‘M your good girl, I am, promise, I’ll be good.”

He doesn’t respond, at least not verbally. But you have to assume he’s happy with your desperate response when he finally delves into your pussy like a man starved, tongue licking into you, the muscle sending spasms up and down your legs. You have to muffle your moans by biting into a pillow, not needing another altercation with his neighbours, but you want nothing more than to yell his name as loud as you can until your voice goes hoarse when he shakes his head from side to side, tongue still buried inside of you and one of his hands now roughly circling your clit.

It’s too much, but it’s not nearly enough. It’s when he switches positions between his hand and mouth that you think you might explode; his mouth latches onto your clit, tongue circling and playing with it and two fingers fucking into you, preparing you for the impressive girth of his own cock.

Your teeth let go of the strong grip it has so you can warn him of your impending orgasm. “Yoongi- gonna come-” You manage to choke out between barely quieted moans.

You know that he wouldn’t be able to respond if he was still suckling on your clit, but you still whine and wiggle your hips as he pulls away, earning you yet another spank to your rear, where you can only assume a nice handprint is forming. “Yeah? Want you to come all over my face, like a good messy whore- gotta come for me before I can fuck you like you need.”

When his mouth finds your swollen clit again, you can’t help it as your orgasm barrels through you almost violently, every muscle tensing and fingers grasping at whatever they can find, neighbour’s delicate sensibilities forgotten as you moan out Yoongi’s name. He licks you through it, fingers no longer pistoning into you. When the last of the tremors have faded he finally pulls away, using his clean hand to wipe your mess off of his chin, though it hardly cleans him.

“Good fucking girl,” The roughness with which he was grinding his still covered bulge into your now sopping wet center would be impossible to ignore even if your head weren’t a million miles away. But for now, everything is Yoongi, every single scent is filled with him and you think that that might be making your head even fuzzier than the drugs coursing through your system, but you’re too far gone to be sure. Or to even care.

Because all you can think about is his mouth-watering hands kneading at the slightly pinkened skin of your ass, his mouth-watering cock rutting against you and his mouth-watering, well, mouth pressing wet kisses and occasional bites up and down your spine. “Yoongi,” You meant to speak with at least a little more conviction, but his name comes out as little more than a mumble.

“Hm,” He hums against your skin and even those slight vibrations reverberate straight to your heart, which starts beating faster at the thought of what’s to come. “What, is my babygirl still needy?”

The use of the word my in front of the affectionate name makes your heart jump, but you don’t even have time to scold yourself for thinking with your post-orgasmic pussy before he continues talking with that sinful mouth of him. “Such a greedy, desperate girl, won’t be happy ‘til you’re stuffed full of my fat cock,” His words have you whining and grinding back against him, where you don’t have to look to know you’re leaving a stain on his favourite jeans. If you’re unlucky- or lucky depending on your mood- he’ll make you clean it up with your tongue as further delicious torture.

But smoking makes Yoongi needy too, no matter how much he teases you for the effect it has on you, and he can’t wait much longer, not with his cock so hard he was a razor blades’ edge from losing his mind. He needs to be inside you as much as you need him.

Which is why you don’t doubt him for a second when he’s murmuring things about how he’s ‘gonna fuck you so good, gonna fuck you stupid,’ and you can only respond with even quieter whispers of ‘I knows’ and ‘pleases’ as he strips himself oh the rest of his clothes, hissing from oversensitivity as his cock makes contact with the air. It’s wonderfully overwhelming and he’s not even fucking you yet.

You can’t even explain how grateful you are when Yoongi turns you around because you love just seeing his cock. You’ve never been one to describe guys’ dicks as pretty before- except that TA you managed to fuck before Jimin sunk his claws into him, Kim Seokjin, because, well, you’re not blind. But Yoongi’s dick is gorgeous. It’s not the biggest thing you’ve ever seen, and it doesn’t have to be, not when it’s girthy enough to make you salivate with a curve that points to the heavens. Gorgeous.

He’s pulling you on top of him so he can sit back down and you’re back to straddling him, and you don’t complain because you know he’s tired both from the pot and crouching on his haunches for access to your center not two minutes ago. Plus he loves when you ride him, breasts bouncing in his face, wetness making a mess out of his lap and full access of your entire body for both his hands and lips.

“Need you to bounce on my fat cock before I fucking explode, baby,” And you’d have to be some sort of a madwoman to deny him.

“Need it too, Yoongs,” You don’t know why you feel the need to remind how desperate you are for him, surely he can feel it, your swollen pussy resting only centimetres above his throbbing length. “Can’t think of anything else.”

“I know,” He’s rubbing the angry red tip against your sopping folds, tinges of overstimulation making you jolt. Or you would jolt if his hands weren’t heavy on your waist, keeping you steady so you couldn’t a) get away from his cock or b) properly sink down onto it. “So pathetic and perfect for me like this, all cock drunk and fucked out and I haven’t even fucked you yet, huh?”

You nod frantically, and you can’t even find the energy to be embarrassed when a hand comes up to pet your hair with a condescending ‘awe’ as he pouts at you. You bat his hand away with a whine and furrowed eyebrows, but all that gets you is his hand tangled in your hair, yanking sharply in retaliation. “Careful, slut, or you won’t be coming for the next week-”

“Please, Yoongi-” You don’t let him finish, knowing from experience to always take his threats seriously. “I’m sorry, I’m fucking sorry, okay just please-”

You cut yourself off with a high pitched, tea kettle-like squeak as he uses his hands on you as leverage to have you sink down onto his cock in one fell swoop. “Shit, god, you’re always so fucking tight around me, fuck me.”

I am, is what you wish you were coherent enough to snark back with, but you’re sure no one would blame you if they could feel what you feel right now. And what you’re feeling right now is how well Yoongi feels inside of you, like no cock you’ve ever had. Every ridge and vein on his cock fills you up to the fucking brim, no room left for a pinky or a thought that has to do with anything other than Yoongi, Yoongi, Yoongi.

And then he starts with those devilish moments of his hip, fucking into you shallowly and slowly to start and it’s all Yoongi’s dick.

“Fucking bounce on it, dove. Fuck yourself on my cock, show me how much you need it,” He speaks through gritted teeth, each word a struggle as he tries not to fuck into you without thought. And it’s with the satisfaction you get knowing he’s just as desperate for you as you are for him that you find the strength to do as he says.

With quivering thighs, you push up and off of his cock, the two of you sharing a harmonious groan at the feeling, foreheads pressed against each other, skin sweaty. And this all just in the calm before the storm.

It’s not long before the both of you are moving frantically, mere seconds, really. It’s intense and all-encompassing, as you grind and roll your hips, cock deeper than you knew to be possible, and his bucking his own hips into you roughly, no doubt as deeply in some sort of euphoria as you are. His hands are everywhere and so are his lips. He sucks marks into your tits and gropes your ass, controlling your movements to the best of his abilities.

All of that, plus your clit grinding against his pelvic bone every other second and your head just might be in another universe.

Yoongi’s words are swirling around in your head, though you’re not properly taking any of it in- his velvety voice goes on about how wet you are, how tight you are, how you’re a good girl and it’s all another instrument in your downfall. You’ve never been much for heights but being with Yoongi feels like something akin to what you assume bungee jumping is like, and you’re just about at that point where your cord runs out of length and your heart drops to the bottom of your stomach.

“Tell me you’re fucking close, baby, c’mon,” This is as close to pleading as you can ever get Yoongi but you’re still swimming in pride. He brings a hand off of your ass to cup your cheek, brushing away your now mussed hair and a single stray tear and you drink in the look in his eyes, dark red-rimmed and needing. “Gonna fill you up with my come, just like I know you like, my perfect little cumslut, fuck, just need you to come first, yeah? All over my fucking cock.”

And with a particularly hard grasp at your ass, bringing you to grind your clit against him again, you’re gone. It’s considerably less intense than the previous one, as many second orgasms are, but your head is still spinning and you think you might have drooled a little, but you don’t mind and you know Yoongi doesn’t. Your attempts to stifle your moans are unsuccessful as the name of the man attached to your favourite cock falls from your lips like a mantra.

And where your orgasm is, Yoongi is rarely far behind- he loves seeing you fall apart around him, because of him and you always clench so fucking hard around him in the peak of your pleasure how could he fucking not. He’s grunting, moaning, damn near growling as he spurts his own release as deep into you as he possibly can, coating every inch of your delectable pussy, vague mumbles of how he’s filling you up, just like you’re meant to be that you can just barely hear.

Shakey breaths hit each of your faces as you come down, now still and worn out. Your chests move up and down and you don’t know when you’ve buried your face into the crook of his neck, but the warmth and smell are more comforting than any hit you’ve ever taken off of one of his blunts.

“Shit, buttercup,” He chuckles, the vibrations rumbling through his chest and where you’ve tucked yourself He runs a hand through his sweaty black locks, the other hand locked around your waist. “I don’t know how we’re gonna move without making this couch fucking disgusting.” Mood killer.

“Don’t give a shit.”

“Yeah, but I do. Especially if Joon or Hobi someone finds it and makes a big fucking deal out of it, like no other guy in his twenties has some come stained furniture.”

You pull back from the spot you wish he’d just let you fall asleep in so he can see your pout. He can’t find the sight of you… adorable? Your hair matted, bruises, courtesy of yours truly littering your tits and chest, a thin sheen of sweat making your skin glow and bottom lip jutted out exactly enough to be overexaggerated and so fucking adorable.

At that moment he’s glad that about three weeks ago the two of you had started to break the unspoken no sleeping over after sex rule because he just wants to clean you up and feel you curl yourself around him like you like to.

You don’t know what time it is, just that it’s late and that it doesn't matter, because this was certainly time well spent. You wonder how much sleep you’ve given up in lieu of Yoongi’s pretty dick. Of course, it does matter... because you have a 9 am class tomorrow morning that you can’t miss, but that’s for future you to worry about. For now, it’s time to try to get up without defiling this Ikea couch (you failed miserably and giggled about it while Yoongi groaned in mock pain), burn out just one more joint, steal some clothes for bed and some snacks from his fridge, and pass the fuck out on his bed, which you think is way better than yours, but that has nothing to do with the boy in it or his comforting warmth and smell.

..............................................................................

Past you is a dumb bitch. Also maybe current you. Point being, you hate you, because you’re sore and stiff and ten minutes late to your dumb 9 am class and it’s all Yoongi’s fucking fault. You texted him this much, calling him a ‘little bitch boy’ for not even waking you up to make you a cup of coffee with his fancy instant coffee machine before you left. He hasn’t responded yet because holy fuck does that guy sleep like a rock. A really cute, cuddly, sex-god rock.

But, as usual, Jimin came in clutch, handing you off a coffee as your paths crossed on campus, each of you heading to your respective classes. He gave you a one-armed-too-tight hug and a comment on how you have that very glamourous ‘I got fucked by Min Fucking Yoongi last night and you didn’t so I’m better than you look.’ You tried to take it as a compliment as you thanked him for the coffee. He gave you a cute kiss to your forehead that reminded you you could never even be annoyed at him for too long.

And now you’re in class. Headache from not getting enough sleep getting worse by the second while you tried not to think about what judgements people must be passing on you, with your sunglasses inside and hickeys you didn’t have time to cover up.

When your phone pings you assume it’s Jimin, with something slutty or sarcastic or both. But it’s not. It’s Yoongi- well, it’s what you have Yoongi’s number saved under, aka the drooling emoji three times over… You’re surprised he’s awake, you’re pretty sure he doesn’t have shit to do until the afternoon.

You have a fleeting thought that it could be a dick pic- yeah it’s a little early for that kind of dumb fuckboy behaviour, and you’d previously thought that too, but Kim Taehyung proved you wrong last year.

Yoongi isn’t a dick pic kind of guy anyway. No, he’s the guy that sends pictures of his hand around your throat that one night you let him take artsy photos of you two fucking on his film camera. The kind of guy that sends you audios of him jerking off and moaning your name that you listen to through your earphones in between classes because he knew you wouldn’t be able to help yourself. He’s the guy that drives you crazy because you can never quite predict what he’s gonna do next.

[9:23 am] From 🤤🤤🤤: you could have woken me you know dummy

[9:24 am] From 🤤🤤🤤: subways are gross in the morning

[9:25 am] From 🤤🤤🤤: i could have u know, driven u…

[9:26 am] From 🤤🤤🤤: cant really say no to u buttercup.

You don’t know why you’re heart’s beating so fast so you reprimand yourself for thinking with your pussy. Min motherfucking Yoongi is gonna be the death of you.

#bts smut #btswritingcafe #yoongi smut #yoongi x reader #bts x reader #buttercup #bts fic #yoongi fic #bts fanfiction #bts oneshot #bts writing #def not my best work but u know JKFDHKJFHS

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foolishlovebugbaby · 4 years

Text

ten-thousand miles gone

prologue

summary: they say time heals all wounds, but the one left by han jisung on your heart is one that you still treat tenderly. alternatively; han jisung reappears into your life like a whirlwind, knocking you off of your feet, after leaving you without a goodbye.

genre: angst

warnings: nothing triggering or rated

word count: 6k

note: in my head, the mind map of the way this particular fic ended went in so many directions, but this was very draining to write so i settled on the one that wouldn’t leave you hanging.

been travelling these wide roads for so long my heart’s been far from you ten-thousand miles gone

In your younger years, life had always seemed to move gradually. Time seemed to be muffled by all the firsts and seconds that came and went like waves, distracting everyone from the reality of growing pains. But college certainly ripped off that bandaid, a cushion no longer supporting your fall into the harsh realities of life.

Second semester of sophomore year had just ended, so now every college student across the country was making a beeline for the airports and bus stations, with tickets home clasped tightly between hands that were potentially developing carpal tunnel syndrome. Luckily for you, home was two train rides and a taxicab away. But like all your independent adventures of navigating life unhinged, no journey would be complete without twenty-something voicemails from your mother telling you to padlock your luggage and some vague, superstitious advice she read on Facebook.

[To ma: yes, i didnt forget to pack your scarf and no, im not going to drink ginger and ginseng to ward off bad train spirits.]

[From ma: thank you. suit yourself , you will be bad spirit magnet !]

You chuckle and shove your phone into your pocket, hailing a cab with one hand while the other slings an abnormally large duffle bag over your shoulder. “North-Hill train station please.” You say to the cab driver and shove your luggage into the seat next to you.

You let out a tired sigh and slump into the pleather seats. Butterflies swarmed your stomach- you always seemed to get them whenever you went back home. Back to the place of some of your greatest and worst memories. Somehow, through the years, the fear of seeing him again in that godforsaken town died down, because the thought of ever being able to see him again at all proved itself to be almost impossible.

Even a fool knows this, you’re the best thing I’ve got…

You almost choke on your spit when that song comes on the radio. Of course that song had to come on so conveniently in the middle of your trip down melancholy lane. You have half a mind to reach over and turn the radio off, but decide against it when you see the cute old man bobbing his head to it.

So instead your mind traces its steps back a few moments until all you’re reminded of is him.

In your head you remember all these great experiences- graduation day, senior prom, camp nights during wintertime and summer carnivals down at the boardwalk. But then your mind tortures you and conjures up these images of what it would’ve been like to have experienced it all with him next to you and suddenly the memories become less fond. It’s treacherous, really, being your own worst enemy. But you learnt the hard way that time slows down for no one.

When you get to the train station, you move in a daze. The muscle memory of validating your ticket and walking to the platform does all the work for you. And usually that would be a good thing, except now it only allowed you to stay in your head a lot more. It’s funny, really, how everytime you see posters and billboards of his group around you don’t flinch. Not anymore at least. Because you don’t know him anymore, and he’s probably forgotten about you.

Sometimes, you’re convinced he was just a character that your very active imagination conjured up to fill gaps in your life with meaning. But every time you open a picture of the pair of you way back when, you’re met with the reality that he was real. Even if it was just for a short amount of time, he was visible to you. Tangible. And meant galaxies to you.

[From mama han: cant wait 2 see u back again ! have dinner with us soon xoxo]

You smile fondly down at your phone once you’re situated in your seat, typing out a reply to the woman you consider a second mom.

You thanked the universe for still keeping her in your life. Sure, her son would probably be known to you as the biggest jackass to exist for eternity, but she would remain sweet and tender in your heart for longer than that.

[To mama han: can’t wait to see you too:)]

You don’t confirm your spot at their dinner table, because frankly speaking, the last time you stepped foot in their house was the summer before university when you went to drop off a box of jisung’s things that you found in your room- sweatshirts, t-shirt’s, notes and other miscellaneous items that demanded you remember every miniscule moment spent with him. And since then you’ve found every excuse not to go near that place. You knew it probably hurt the woman whenever you conjured up some arbitrary excuse to not dig in to her incredible cooking, but the finger is to be pointed at Han Jisung and Han Jisung only. Screw him.

She sometimes tries to address the elephant in the room whenever you do get to talk during her visits at your childhood home. Like It would be great to have you both visit at the same time or Would you like me to call him? I’m sure he’s not busy right now. Yeah, subtle as a gun, but you love her still.

You’re not one to believe in luck, and if you did you’d actually quite fancy yourself as the most unluckiest person of them all, but you thank the heavens that he’s never been back home the same time as you have. Either that, or you’re just way too good at being further than a 10-mile radius from him. Like last semester break, when you got word from one of your childhood friends that he would be in town so you decided to cancel all your plans of going back home under the guise of going on a group excursion somewhere up north. Obviously, all you did was stay in your dorm and binge watch Gossip Girl for three weeks, but you concluded that anything would be better than having to confront your demons- or demon. Singular.

What would you even say if you saw him? Realistically, not that much. Ideally, you’d destroy him with words. All that pent up anger for him leaving you behind and all the unresolved feelings left to concentrate in an urn you buried deep in yourself exploding like Pandora's box right before him. 5 years passed, and yet you still found it difficult to imagine what a conversation would be like with him again.

Honestly, you’d tell him to stay a while longer, just so that he’d remain vivid in your memories once he decided to leave again.

When the taxi cab pulled up in front of your childhood home, you were half asleep and in desperate need of a solid meal. “Thanks, keep the change,” you say groggily as you pass the money to the driver.

You take a deep breath once you’re out of the car, your duffle bag slung around your frame. It’s been a very long time since you were last here. The months seemed to pile up without you noticing, and now that you think about it, it had been a good whole year that passed. You don’t know where the time went, but you were definitely here now.

You trudge up to the door, ringing the bell once. “Hey ma,” You say as she squeals and pulls you in for a hug. “I’m glad you’re back in one piece, especially since you ignored my advice.” She says pointedly and ushers you in. “Yeah, well, I guess the train spirits didn’t feel like victimising me today.” She looks at you with her mouth hung open and slaps your arm.

“Don’t say that!” She’s about to scold you more when your dad enters the living room in his pajama pants. “My daughter finally decides to show her face around here! Send in the doves!” You always knew that you got your flare for drama from your dad.

“How are you doing sweetie, we missed you.” He gives you a big bear hug and you sigh. “I know, it’s been too long.”

“There is not enough time in this world to mope around! Now, darling, it’s very late so your father and I are off to bed. There’s some leftovers for you in the toaster oven in case you get hungry,” They both smother you in a hug and you almost suffocate. “We’d love to hear all about your university in the morning. Sleep tight honey.”

And so you’re left to your own devices. Again. Sighing, you reluctantly head up the stairs and make your way into your old room. A smile finds its place on your lips.

The room is oddly clean- you figured your mother must have emotionally cleaned in here (more than once) during your time away from home. But the walls are still the same ugly navy blue, and your star-print curtains remained planted in front of your windows with planet decorations all over the ceiling to match. Funny. He helped you decorate. Said it made your room feel like the universe was just the two of you.

You didn’t know that what he really meant was that you were his safe place.

You spend a good thirty-minutes unpacking, tinkering around your old room and texting your friends about your trip home. It feels like an eternity passed when you finally decide to listen to your growling stomach and go get something to eat. But you’re picky and nothing in your kitchen seems to entice you enough to devour it, so you swipe your house keys off the kitchen countertop and head to your door. 7-Eleven it is. You’re dressed in a pair of leggings and a pink sweater with fluffy slides to match, but you could care less.

As you walk out of your driveway and head down your street, you pass by his house. The lights are off (of course, since it’s an ungodly 1AM) and it practically looked like a dollhouse.

You turn your gaze away.

The walk to the local 7-Eleven is only 5 Hozier tracks away, so you reach there in no time. Your tummy growls when you enter, and you immediately head to the instant section. Hmm, ramen, tteokbokki or pasta, choices choices choices…

You’re too busy pondering to notice the figure clad in sweats and a baseball cap standing frozen at the end of the aisle, gaping like a fish your way. He practically isn’t breathing, but your presence had knocked the wind right out of his chest.

“Y-Y/n?” He manages to breathe out, and you look around, confused. Did someone just say my name?

Your eyes slowly turn to his figure, and you can barely see who it is from afar. Tan skin can be seen from the collar under his hoodie, and dirty-blonde hair peeks out at the ends of his baseball cap. You feel like you’re seeing things, because you know that baseball cap. You bought it.

Slowly, your eyes trail over his face, and you feel the air leave your lungs.

Jisung still remembers the last time he saw you. Well, the last time he saw you before he didn’t say goodbye.

It was a Thursday afternoon, History class had just ended. On the way out, he caught a glimpse of you. He hadn’t seen much of you the entire week, but that was because he was actively trying to avoid you. But there you were, at your locker putting away your books with that puppy-dog expression you always wore whenever you were tired and in need of a good nap. He stood for a few moments, taking you in. Even if your hair was messily up in a bun with a hoodie two sizes too big drowning your frame, he still thought you looked like an absolute dream. He wanted to go up to you and ask you how was calculus? And when you pout and say boring, he would suggest you come over for some hot chocolate and a movie. And you would say yes, with a sleepy, lopsided smile, and his body would feel all warm and fuzzy at the sight of you.

But he doesn’t do any of that. Instead, he leaves his heart by the lockers, and with one last look, he walks away. His jacket does nothing to warm the cold that creeps its way up.

Had he known he wouldn’t get to see you one last time after that, he would’ve watched you for a few seconds longer. Had he known that you would fall sick and stay home from school the day before his flight, he would have told you to take better care of yourself. And had he known that the last time he’d see you would be when you’re drained and tired and down, he would have gone up to you to make you smile, one last time.

He never stopped recreating pictures of you in his head, fearing the outlines of you would fade.

Except now, as you stand a mere six feet away, he feels as though you stepped out of his mind and into his world once again. He can see you. You’re there.

None of the pictures of you that he drew up in his head would ever compare to the way you looked right then. Beautiful, just as he remembered you.

Your name feels like a foreign language when it leaves his lips.

The air is so thick between the pair of you that it makes everything around him slow down. He sees your eyes move from confusion, to shock, to utter fear and bewilderment, and then to pain. It feels as though a knife impaled his heart when he sees your eyes quiver.

He always loved your eyes. Dark brown, like freshly turned over earth, warmed by the sun. They look at him with sorrow now.

Your arms drop to your sides and your lips quake, “J-Jisung?” God, he forgot what it was like to hear his name in your voice. He hates that it’s said with so much heartache.

You run out without thinking twice.

“Stop, slow down! W-wait!” You hear his voice call out for you, but you continue to run- where? You don’t know. You just wanted to get away. Your feet take you far down the sidewalk, lamp-posts your only source of light at this time of night.

But you’re not fast enough, and for the first time in a long time, you feel his grip on your arm.

“Let go of me,” You say, your voice already breaking. He breaks with it.

“Y/N listen-” He pants out.

“No, let go of me!” You snatch your arm away from his grip. God, you’re furious. And hurt. And every other emotion there is to feel when you see the person who left you with nothing.

Your raised voice startles the two of you, and you both stand there for a moment, breathless. From running, from shock.

He doesn’t say anything and just gapes at you, “Well?” You provoke pointedly. “What? Cat got your tongue?”

“No ‘Hey y/n! How’ve you been? Long time no see since, you know, I abandoned you’.” You say harshly and the knife in his heart twists.

“I know you’re hurt-” You cut him off.

“Hurt? Hurt? Hurt doesn’t even come close to what I feel, Jisung.” All the words you want to spew get caught in the back of your throat and you fight yourself to keep it together because you don’t want him to see you cry. You don’t want him to catch you vulnerable and raw, because you don’t know if you can trust him with that part of you again.

“Can we please just- can we please just talk?” He begs, and you scoff. “Please?” His eyes plead with you, and you frustratedly run a hand through your hair.

“So talk.” You cross your arms over your chest and look at anywhere but him. He doesn’t say anything, and each time he tries to, all he does is end up biting his tongue. Where does he even begin?

“I’m sorry,” He croaks out, even though it’s the worst thing to say.

“Great. All is forgiven.” You’re ruthless, but that’s only because he didn’t show any mercy when he left.

He searches your eyes, not knowing what he could say to make things right. Or if that was even a possibility anymore. You both stand in silence for a while, and slowly your resolve breaks away.

“Why?” You say, your voice coarse and exhausted. “Why’d you do it? I tortured myself for months- no, years asking myself what I did wrong that caused you to leave me like that. What- was it something I said? Something I did? Please- tell me, I’m begging you,” You’re full-on sobbing now, tears flowing down your face like waves. They twinkle in the warm streetlights and he feels the ground beneath him crumble. The wound he left on your heart was ripped open again, and you couldn’t help but bleed in front of him. “P-please, Jisung. It’s been killing me for so long.”

Tears leave his eyes, “It wasn’t your fault,” He says softly.

“Then what was it? Because for all this time I broke myself down, questioning why you left like that. For so long I thought you were mad at me- I thought you became tired of me, bored of having me around. Do you know what that’s like? Tearing yourself apart to find answers you know you can’t answer by yourself?” “Shit, I thought you didn’t need me anymore. Which sucked, because I needed you.” You whisper through ragged breaths and he takes careful steps closer to you.

“Of course I still needed you- I haven’t stopped needing you, y/n.” His voice is as broken as yours.

“Then why?” Your voice is barely above a whisper and you struggle so hard to not fall to the ground.

“Do you know what it felt like to wake up one morning, clueless and thinking everything was fine, and then finding out that it was, in fact, not? Do you know what it was like to find out the person you cared for the most up and left you alone and with no explanation- not even a single goodbye? To be desperate to hear his voice again, and wonder to yourself why it was so easy for him to cut you off like that?” He stood right in front of you, so close that he could touch you.

“I searched for you. I still looked for you in the hallways at school, hoping it was just one of your stupid pranks. I waited in my room for you to climb up to my window again and whisk me away to the park for one of our late-night walks. I called your phone for days, just in case you’d finally get annoyed and pick up. You never did. You never did,” You didn’t notice that your face was in his hands and that he tried so desperately to wipe your tears away, his own streaming down his face.

He sucked in a breath, “I left like that because I knew that I wouldn’t be able to get on that plane with you watching. That I would drop everything, all my stupid dreams, to stay in this stupid town for god knows how long with you. Leaving you was the most painful part,”

“That day I found out I passed the audition- do you remember? You were so happy for me, more happy than I was. The only thing on my mind was the fact that I had to leave everything behind to chase after this dream- to chase after a dream that came true because of you. I wasn’t sure anymore. But you were so sure of me, so ready to see me attain everything we talked about, that the thought of all of that being in vain because of my cowardice ate me up inside. I thought that maybe if I could keep you at a distance- make you mad at me for ignoring you, have you hate me- that it would make it a little easier to let you go of me,” Your lips quiver.

“It wasn’t easy-”

“I know, I know that.” He rests his forehead against yours and squeezes his eyes shut as he hears your soft sobs. “It was so that I wouldn’t have a memory of leaving you behind in an airport. I wasn’t ready to have that image in my mind haunt me. I’ve regretted it everyday. You have to believe me when I say that.”

“Then why didn’t you call back? Or even send a message?” Your eyes search his for answers as you pull your forehead away from his to get a clearer look.

“I thought you hated me. That you didn’t want anything to do with me anymore.”

“Bullshit. You thought wrong.” Angrily, you push at his chest with closed fists and shut eyes, “You thought wrong,” You push him away until you’re no longer in his grip. “Let me go,” You whimper when he tries to reach for you again. “That doesn’t justify why you left me like that. I felt like I meant nothing to you for so long. You threw me away like I didn’t mean anything- made me feel like I was insignificant.”

“You meant everything to me!” He shouts out, shocking you into silence. “Don’t you see it?” When you only stare at him in confusion, he sucks in a breath.

“The mere thought of leaving you was enough for me to think twice. Sitting with you in French class and giggling because we didn’t understand a word, spending so many nights with you in your ridiculous dinosaur onesie, getting to walk around aimlessly until 4am in this godforsaken town as if time wasn’t fleeting- I-,” He runs a hand over his face, frustratedly wiping his tears away. “I wasn’t ready for it to be over. I didn’t want to miss graduation, the day we looked forward to since grade school. I didn’t want to facetime you on prom night while you look so goddamn beautiful, knowing that someone else would be getting to slow dance with you. Knowing that I wouldn’t be there, that I would be missing out- that I would be missing you every goddamn day made me realise I wouldn’t be able to last without you.”

“Selfishly ripping you apart from me felt like the only option. And it was so cruel, I know that. I’m the selfish asshole,” He takes exactly five steps to stand in front of you, and places a hand tenderly on your cheek.

“I was selfish because I knew I couldn’t have you. I was in love with you, y/n. So fucking in love and you didn’t even know. And after all this time, I still am.” He says that last sentence in a whisper, and before you know it, his lips are on yours.

His mouth is so warm against yours, so tender, and yet they set your skin on fire.

You pull away and take two steps back.

“Y-you don’t get to kiss m-me like that, not again,” You say breathless. You’re reminded of sophomore year, and the kiss in his living room that made you feel weightless and lightheaded.

“Y/n-”

“I think we’ve talked enough for tonight,” Your heart hammers in your chest and the blood rushes to your face so fast that you swear you’re shivering. His eyes are illuminated by the streetlamps and you see them break right before you, defeated. Yours are no different.

You walk away, choking back sobs.

He doesn’t try to stop you.

It’s 4PM when you decide to get out of bed.

Your eyes are practically closed shut from your lack of sleep and you don’t bother to brush your hair, or undrape the blanket around your shoulders when you head downstairs. Your parents are sitting in the living room, oblivious and unassuming, but when they see you they almost go into cardiac arrest.

“What’s wrong?” Your mother asks tentatively, extremely unsure as to why her daughter looked so abnormally disheveled. “Did you know he was going to be back in town?” You croak out, and she sighs.

“So you saw him.” She states, and your dad pretends to read the newspaper.

“Why didn’t you tell me ma, you know what happened-”

“Exactly; everyone knows what happened, and everyone knows how ruined you’ve both been because of it. But nothing’s going to change if you keep sweeping it under the rug. Honey, I know you’re hurting,” She rests a hand on your cheek and you close your eyes at the feeling. “But this is your chance to get closure.”

“What if I don’t want it anymore?”

“Oh that’s a load of cow dung. Look at you; you’re a mess.” Gee, thanks mom.

She bites her lip and pauses for a second, “What if I told you that during your first year in college, the very first semester you were away, he came back? It was the autumn before things took off for him, and he showed up in town looking for you everywhere, not knowing you had left. I felt so bad, but you’re my daughter, and my first instinct was to protect you because I knew that for the first time in a long time, you were enjoying yourself. So I didn’t give him your new number, said your phone was broken, and he was absolutely heartbroken. I regret it slightly, but maybe this time you both can stop being constantly out of step.”

Your mouth hung agape and your head spun. He looked for me?

“Don’t leave things like this, you need each other.” She gives you a squeeze, and you sigh.

She was right. Years passed with so many things left unsaid, so much time gone. And as much as you hated to admit it, you were never going to get that time back. It would kill you knowing that you didn’t take the chance to fix things. You were already broken down to your bones, what’s left to chip away?

You uncoil yourself from your blanket and fling it onto the couch, groaning when you realise you’re going to have to face him again. The events that had elapsed last night were still hard to wrap your mind around, and you found yourself wondering if it ever did happen. You could already feel your heart pound at the thought of it. His words float in your mind ceaselessly; so much so that when you step out of your house, you almost miss the slumped figure on your sidewalk.

He gets up at the sound of your door closing.

His hair was messy, pointing every which way, and the same clothes from earlier were now wrinkled and crimped. His eyes devastated you. They looked worn down and exhausted, much like yours did.

“Walk with me?” He breathes out, and you nod.

Seeing him in daylight is different. As you two walk, you become increasingly aware of exactly how much he’s grown. He used to be only a few centimeters taller than you, but now you only reach his chin. Barely. But his skin is the same golden tan and his cheeks remained full. You’re close enough that you can smell his scent- a scent you didn’t know you missed until now. But in retrospect, you just missed him.

You both reach the small park in the middle of your neighborhood, and you find yourselves under the big oak tree that he had deemed our spot all those years ago. You look up into his eyes, and for a moment you remember what it’s like to feel home again.

“Do you remember the first time we found this place? You were always so terrible at hide and seek.”

You find yourself smiling at the memory. He hid from you, behind this very tree, for so long that it had felt like you spent hours searching for him. When you finally did find him, you were angry and upset with him with red cheeks to match.

“That’s only because you were always so good at hiding from me,” There’s ambiguity that you didn’t intend in that statement, which brings you both back to silence.

After a while, you gather the courage to speak again. “So about that kiss-” He winces and scratches the back of his neck.

“I’m sorry for catching you off-guard like that last night-”

“I’m talking about the one on your birthday, sophomore year.” His lips squeeze into a tight line and his round eyes stare at you dumbfoundedly.

“I-I always thought you never remembered that. You never brought it up, so I thought that it was just a mistake.” You fiddle with your fingers and gnaw at your bottom lip, feeling the heat creep to the back of your neck.

“Y/n, it was never a mistake. I wanted to kiss you- and I did- because I was sick of being confused about my feelings for you.” You look back up at him, “I didn’t bring it up because I was too scared of scaring you away with it all.”

“Well you should’ve, so that I wouldn’t be so confused either.” His expression changes, and you didn’t think it was possible, but it becomes even more defeated than it was a few moments ago. He rubs his face with his face with his hands, leaning against the tree.

He’s about to speak again, but your lips reach his before he gets the chance.

His soft cheeks rest in your hands as you taste him, soaking in the feeling of his warm lips against yours. This time, for the first time, the kiss lasts longer than a few seconds.

The sensation sends shivers up your arms and down your spine. When he kisses you back, he kisses you with so much fervour that you’re worried you’ll pass out at the feeling. But his arms grip you tightly around your waist to keep you there, with him, firmly in place. Your mind is fuzzy and your heart beats erratically in your chest when he squeezes your waist. Craving him like this is new to you, and yet you can’t help but yearn for more.

Where words failed you before, you make up for it in slow dances across his lips.

“It was worth it, right?” Your question comes as a surprise to him.

Earlier, when the sun had begun to set, the two of you decided that public parks were not exactly the most ideal place to have a heart-to-heart. So you walked back to his place, hands shoved in to the depths of your pockets, but your shoulders brushing against his with every step.

The two of you laid face to face on his bed, pillow-width apart.

“Leaving, yes. Hurting you, not at all.” He answers quietly, his hand drawing circles on the small of your back.

Under his bedroom lights, you take his breath away. His eyes trace over your features, over every dip and bump of the outlines of your face and he hopes that this vision of you never leaves him. He takes in every mole and freckle on your face like it’s the first time he’s seen them, when the reality is that he always used to map out constellations on your cheeks while you slept. He’s afraid that if he blinks, you’ll vanish again, so he tries to keep his gaze steady on yours, unwavering and certain. The way he looks at you sends the butterflies in your stomach into a frenzy.

“I miss you,” You say, your voice meek and he feels his heart break all over again. “I miss you too.” You both speak in present-tense because even though he could touch you, see you, he knew it would take an indefinite amount of time for the pain of losing so many moments to heal.

He pulls you into him, savouring the feeling of your embrace. Holding you makes him feel at home, and god knows he’s been away for so long. You nestle into the crook of his neck, and his hands rest under your sweater and on supple skin, willing your pain to go away.

There are an infinite amount of things he wants to tell you, but he figures “I love you.” would suffice for now.

Life never slowed down. As much as it felt like it had when you spent your days with him again, the days piled up one by one. And soon enough, time caught up.

Soon enough, you would need to book your train ticket back to the city, because your three-week long semester break would draw to a close. He would have to book a plane ticket back to glitz and glamour, and the pair of you would wind up in the same dilemma that you were in five years ago.

Only this time, he never leaves your side during your fleeting time together. This time, he tries to make up for all the lost moments within the span of three weeks. He doesn’t let go of any chance to be with you- to hold you, to touch you, to kiss you. He imprints the feeling of his skin on yours so that you never forget. So that he never forgets. Your eyes are cosmic in the moments that you share intimately, and he soaks up every inch of you so that he never forgets what it feels like to share the same breath.

He listens to all your stories and all your bizarre adventures with a fond smile, because you tell them with such wonder that it makes him feel like he was there. Your voice is the only one he wants in his head.

When he drops you off at the station, he doesn’t say goodbye. But not like last time; he doesn’t say goodbye because instead he says I’ll see you soon and Get there safely. When he watches the train pull away from the platform, he prays he sees it soon again because it carries his heart with him.

He likes to imagine that you send him voice notes of your day and how frustrated you are with you OChem professor. That you send him pictures of yourself, and all the cute little cats you come across during your walks to class. That you send him long letters in the mail like the hopeless romantic that you are. In return, he would introduce you to his members- he knows you’d get along with Hyunjin the best, because you both would like to bitch about him while he’s still in the room. He likes the idea of facetiming you whenever you have the time, and getting to say he misses you, even if it’s only through a screen. He likes to imagine that in every lyric he writes, an essence of you treads in his words, because you’re his only muse. And he envisions the day when he’s finally back in the town where time slows, up in your room where the rest of the world crumbles away and your slates are clean once again.

But for now he watches as the train becomes nothing but a speck in the distance, waiting for it all to play out.

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themoonisbeautiful · 4 years

Text

Go-Between

Someone sent me this reading about your sun and moon. I tried it and it is so true? I’m gonna try to himay and react to each sentence just for deeper analysis to myself.

Deep inside you likely feel a lot of doubt no matter how convincing and self-assured you may seem to people.

This was the first sentence, and all I could say was what the fuck. Just the first sentence and it felt like it read my whole self and life. Because this is fucking true. I do have a lot of self-doubt. I just pretend and act sure and confident, but yo. Deep inside I’m this coward doubtful person that no one must have known. Maybe this is one of those “mysterious” side of me as a scorpio, and only those whom I’ve opened up to must know how doubtful of a person I am.

It is next to impossible for you to set goals and define your purpose in life.

Again, this is true. I was only in the second sentence and I can’t agree no more. It’s very accurate especially now that I’m in my 20s and people expect me to have a plan in life. People around me do have plan -- whether older, same age, or younger. I always think about it but it’s so hard to plan and set goals? What more to define my purpose in life. Thinking about it further, my doubtful self, described in the first sentence, might be a factor as to why setting goals and defining my purpose is extra hard than anyone.

You have too much trust in those around you and this can be a weakness if you always want to hear everyone's views. The people close to you like all natives of Moon in Libra, regardless of whether they are friends or family, powerfully influence you.

Oh god. Another fucking true shit. I don’t know if it was because I doubt myself so much that I have more trust in other people, or it’s the other way around. Either way, this is still true. I always want to hear everyone’s side, opinion, their thoughts, because I trust other people more than myself. Hence, it is true that in way those people around me, those I listen to and trust, have so much influence in me because I tend to follow what they say more than myself.

The way others see you is how you tend to evaluate yourself, instead of by the way you really are. Acting according to your own true wants is important for you to learn. Do not worry too much about what other people might think of your behavior.

Oh my god. I can’t say anything but fucking shit yes. This may be synonymous to “I tend to compare myself to others and find validation from others.” I know, this is a really bad habit (and I promise I try not to do this but I really can’t help it) but I always compare myself to others that it makes me doubt myself more. I compare other’s prodcutivty and success and mine. Again, I don’t know who’s affecting who, if is it because I’m naturally doubtuful or was that exatly why I was doubtful. But the following sentences, made me feel assured that I should stop it. I’m always worrying and anxious about what people think of me, and I should stop it. I should just do what I want and be what I want.

Others are drawn to your leisurely and elegant personality and attracted to your charming nature.

In relation to that previous sentence, this sentence feels like telling me that I shouldn’t really worry about what people think of me because being my true self, being whoever I am is my charm? But is it? I’ve heard people tell me something like this. But really? Again, my doubtful self is showing (or is this I’m just afraid to validate or I’m afraid to be called suepr full of myself by admitting). Hopefully I can humbly accept this.

Your combination balances a peaceable and graceful Libra with a hard driving and forceful Scorpio. You know naturally when to use tact and diplomacy and when it is smart to be assertive. Your power to manage others works to your reward in life, even though you are not as assertive as your other Scorpios.

The first sentence made me felt, wow. That was a beautiful sentence. At the same time I somewhat understand it as there’s a battle (yes battle not balance fjslfjsd) of peace and force inside me. The following sentence, I’m not too sure or I haven’t noticed it myelf. Maybe I do know how when it is to be assertive? Do I? I’m not sure because I’ve never really considered myself as assertive. Just forcing myself to be one when it really, really needs to be, maybe yes. Also, managing others? Maybe, but I feel like I still have to learn a lot on this. But the last one, must be the answer why think this way. I’m not as assertive as other Scorpios. That’s true.

Maintain your freedom and concentrate on doing what you believe is best for you.

I think this is similar to one of those sentences previously. I feel like this sentence is telling me, again or maybe emphasizing, to trust myself more. Believe in myself. It would be best for me.

You are a dreamer and a romantic.

This one, maybe a few years back I would super agree. But not, reality hit me hard and I’ve become pessimistic (I’m not sure if this is the right term or another word similar to this). I’m not actually sure if I could still consider mysef as a dreamer when I can’t dream anymore. I don’t even know now how to set goals in my life. But okay. I just searched what dreamer meant and what I found was: “spend a lot of time thinking about and planning for things that they would like to happen but which are improbable or impractical.” On a second thought, I might be really a dreamer. I do spend time thinking about things but those aren’t gonna happen. Maybe I’ve come to realize as I aged that they’re improbable that it has been hard setting goals and defining my purpose. Always stuck in impracticality and when I try to set realistic goals, it’s just too hard.

For the romantic, at first, before I look for the exact definition, I can’t really see myself as one because first, I’ve never been in that romantic position. I can’t imagine how, and I’ve lost hope in finding love (i know im only 20 but wtf. I think I’ll still be really single even at the age of 30... or forever). But as I read the definition, “who often takes an idealized or old fashioned view towards love or who acts in a manner traditionally thought of as courting or wooing a significant other. An example of a romantic is a person who watches a lot of old love stories on TV,” I think it applies to me. When it comes to love I think I’m still old fashioned, an old soul or something that courting or wooing would be really nice? Unlike some people nowadays, if ever, and just if ever I’m not necessarily gonna be single forever, I’d still like to fall in love slowly, yet surely ? Wait it’s really hard to explain at this point since I’ve never experienced and only seen them through my friends’ love life or in k-dramas.

You like to delve deeply into things and you are never happy with surface impressions.

I’m not sure in which perspective should I look at this sentence but, between delving deeply into things vs surface impressions, of course I’d choose delving deeply. I think it’s more honest? It’s more trustful? More feeling of at ease to know what exactly behind things? Bottom line, I also agree on this.

You have a strong belief in people and the knowledge that they have.

I don’t know why this sentence keeps on being rephrased or does the person who made this really want to emphasize on this? Haha. But like what I said. this is true. I do believe in people and the knowledge that they have. It’s actually interesting how people think and what they know? How different are their knowledge from mine? Although most of the time, I feel more doubtful and dumber, but I do see how much potentials and capabilities they have, that’s why I believe in them. It’s just sad that most of the time, people don’t see it themselves. It’s sadder that I don’t see it on myself too.

You are too frequently only concerned with instant gratification even though you have the intelligence, charm, and magnetism to achieve a great deal in life.

Although I usually convinced myself that I’m not like this, but as I contemplate on myself, I am somewhat like this. I want to see results fast as fast as possible. and if I don’t I tend to consider it automatically as a failure, thus doubting myself, thus giving up easily. But maybe, as the following clause states, I should really stop this doubting and stop giving up easily. If I don’t get those “immediate rewards” or results quickly, I should stop thinking that I’m not worthy or I can’t do it because I can still. I just need to be more patient, and more persevering I guess?

Guard against taking less than you are able of accomplishing or becoming complacent.

Okay I think this relates to the sentence above. I’ve been doubting myself so much, and thinking that I’m not worthy or that I can’t do anything much that I’ve been scared to doing more of what I’m capable too. I’ve always underappreciated myself, and always and always think that everything I do is always not good. Hence, in order to avoid this, I always choose not to take risk and go to the safe zone.

Just as a counter-argument, but how can I know if I can’t do it? What if it really is out of my capacity? But I wouldn’t know if I wouldn’t try it right? But what I tried it and I really can’t and others are affected by my performance? So does that mean I should give up easily, again?

Your abilities are well suited to politics, law, and social work.

For this sentence, I want to laugh. I’ve never dreamed of being involved in politics or law, and I don’t think I would ever dream of it. I may eat my words in the future but I really can’t see myself in that field. Maybe once when I tried thinking if I could be the president. I told my parents I would tell all the people to plant trees. Back then, I didn’t know how hard it is and it’s not easy as just commanding people to plant trees. Maybe another time when I was watching legal dramas? I thought it was cool to be a lawyer or judge, defending the weak and such. Also another time whenever I think maybe it would be nice if I could by the first lawyer or something my family (immediate fam). But me to the person who made this: are you really sure??? How?? Which ability? Which aspect? You jsut told me I’m so doubtful. How are my abilities suited for politics and law? Just thinking about learning politics and law makes me doubt and stress myself. It’s too hard. Too complicated. Especially here in my country? Oh god. Maybe social work would do. But I think I’d choose that as a part-time work.

The creativity of the Scorpio enhances Libra Moon and gives you good taste and strong creative interests. You can be disconcerted if a color scheme does not match because you are very sensitive to visual stimulation.

This is actually cool. I’m not sure if this is true to myself though because I consider myself more of a trying hard artistic person, if I look at being creative in this perspective. Again, I consulted the best friend google and it says, “ having or showing an ability to make new things or think of new ideas. : using the ability to make or think of new things : involving the process by which new ideas, stories, etc., are created. “ Maybe I am really? More than people telling myself that I am creative, maybe I really am? I’m in the middle. I’m not sure exactly. It feels like I am creative but at the same time I’m not fully creative. I don’t know it’s still confusing. or am I again underappreciating myself.

For some Scorpio-Librans, zealotry is the result of the quest for truth. Your imagination is very strong and you need to guard against being fooled by charlatans who offer the secrets to the universe.

This part gave me a hard time understanding. I can’t comprehend exactly what it is telling me, such that what’s the connection of imagination with being fooled? I can’t understand this yet, maybe I need to think this over and over, and deeper. But with that phrase “guard against being fooled by charlatans who offer the secrets to the universe,” okay I might agree on that. People say I’m gullible (yes this is me validating my personality from others), and I’ve realized that too and I should be careful of this gullible-ness.

You will hurry whenever you sense injustice or unethical conduct is compromised, because you believe in fair play.

Is this why earlier it stated that my abilities are suited for politics or law? Lol. But in a way I have to agree on this 1/2. When I see that something is not right, or as the phrase states it, when I “sense injustice or unethical conduct is compromised,” not that I will act again, but it will really bother me. Maybe if I’m less doubtful or I’m good at speaking I would “hurry” and act on it, but it will bother me first. I will think about it first, if am I being in the justice side or not. Sometimes, I would also consult others first.

You need to be careful about your tendency to preach and moralize because of your code of ethics.

With this, I have to somewhat disagree. Like what I said earlier I do get bothered so much if I sense injustice or something unethical. But I wouldn’t act on it right away. I wouldn’t really preach or moralize most of the time, maybe if I really have to? Or if someone started debating or talking about that to me? and nowadays I’m also leaning towards doing something like Socratic method, rather than “preaching” and “moralizing,” I think. To some extent it might still be “preaching” and “moralizing” but strictly speaking, I’m not sure if I tend to be like that. To add, my friend also told me she doesn’t see me that way (yes, validating from others again).

Delight and leisure loving are found in the signs of your combination. Basically you are a libertine no matter how high-minded and idealistic you try to be.

This one. It’s so..... huh? I don’t know. Sure, I can see how I love delight and leisure. Super love especially alone times. But the libertine. high-minded. idealistic. Those words look simple but what definition exactly? how exactly? but maybe, and from what I can understand, it means that no matter how I try to pretend to be perfectionist? or having high standards? in reality I’m not? because at the end of it all, if I’m faced with something that delights me or seems to be a leisure, I’d be satisfied with it? Am I making sense? Am I even making the right interpretation? I need to think about this further.

The barriers to your fulfillment are laziness and self-indulgence.

And so the whole paragraph ended with a warning. It true but a little bit ironic. I think it’s true that laziness might be really a barirer to my fullfillment--but I’d rather call it easily discouraged. Sometimes, I think I’m lazy because I’m really lazy. Other times, I think I’m lazy because I’m discouraged and don’t want to do it. And speaking of not doing it, like self-indulgence, if I won’t do it, I won’t do it (unless needed or I’m forced to but I think that would just bring bad results). When I want to do it, then I will do it. And yes, I said it’s a bit ironic because going back to the very top, the first paragraph seemed to be telling me to do what I want and not be afraid of what people think of me, yet here it’s as if telling that at the same time be careful. Or maybe I need to find the right balance? This last sentence, is a warning, but a very hard-thing-to-do warning.

08.03.20

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ask-dancer-jimin-blog · 7 years

Text

Regrets (I have none) TAEGI

This is my gift to @ask-camboy-taetae because we both love Taegi and she was kind of my muse for inspiration yeet. Love you kat and hope you liked it!!! Name: Regrets (I have none) Pairing: Taegi (YoongixTaehyung), side jikook cause im jikook trash Rated: M for slight smut (not explicit though) Summary: Yoongi had many regrets, but meeting Taehyung wasn't one of them. Not when he disappeared from his life and much less when he once again got to see him, in a very akward way but all the more special (Tattoo artist! Yoongi x Teacher!Taehyung) Min Yoongi regretted many things in his life. Regretted dropping out of college. Regretted not haven properly spoken to his mother before taking his leave when his father kicked him out because he wanted to be a rapper. Regretted even getting a tattoo with a red rose on his shoulder because of one night he was feeling extra poetic and thought red was a passionate color. He had an extensive list of regrets because he, although a reserved person, tended to make many mistakes or at least it seemed that way. But if there was one thing he didn't, something that as meaningless at it seems that he keeps close to his heart, regret was meeting Kim Taehyung. It might seem stupid to reminiscence the memory of the boy he went to middle school with. It might have even seem meaningless to even think way back to meeting someone from your childhood. He was just a kid back then but Kim Taehyung seemed to have struck a chord within him, left a mark in him because no matter how many years had passed he could never forget him. That boy with red glasses, bright honey eyes, chubby cheeks, and braces who was the first person in his entire life who wanted to be his friend. The boy who was bullied, pushed around, and teased for his appearance and strange habits yet still remained with a bright boxy smile on his face. The one who taught Yoongi what it meant to socialize to feel wanted and appreciated. The same boy who after their freshman year of high school banished without a trace or even a good bye. He had stepped into his life and just when Yoongi had gotten far too attached for his own liking, that boy had gone and Yoongi had experienced for the first time what he later realized was heartbreak. Even then Yoongi did not regret. He's closing the shop late again. He had a last minute client who begged that he tattoo him. Yoongi was weak to pleading, and he got rather easily annoyed when they whined and begged endlessly, and had reluctantly accepted with a sigh as he looked at the design and set up the equipment. He'd heard a snicker somewhere behind him as he began his work from his coworker and his best friend, Namjoon, who had only chuckled with a shake of his head as he cleaned up the rest of the unused equipment. The man was always kind and waited for him to finish up even if a good two to three hours had passed. He had just placed the lock with the chains around the metal gate on the door when he turned to the purple haired male next to him who took a long drag of his cigarette, a gentle smile at his face. He went to offer Yoongi a stick as the male slipped it between his fingers and nodded gratefully, taking his black lighter to light the stick taking soft and light drags. There was a comfortable silence as both leaned against the wall, sighing once in a while. "Its okay if you leave me behind, Joon. We do live upstairs and I’m sure you get bored waiting", Yoongi had broken the silence suddenly as he eyed the male from the corner of his eye. "It's cool, hyung. It doesn't hurt to stay with you. I wouldn't be doing much if I left any earlier", the male shrugged nonchalantly throwing his cigarette on the floor and stepping on it. "but I was gonna ask sooner. We should go out tonight. Jungkook called up saying that Jimin insisted we go out for drinks. Hell he even begged that I convince you. You know how Jungkook is when Jimin's involved. He'd do anything to please him and the shorty insisted we all go." "Jungkook, is stupid and in love, but so is Jimin. Neither can go a minute without being next to each other, but anyways, I guess I'll go. It's been a while", Yoongi mumbles. "Who knows you might get laid. Heard Jimin's bringing one of his cute coworkers along", Namjoon mentioned suggestively. It sounded far too suspicious and Namjoon better not have intended to set him up with someone because his obvious answer would have been to decline any hook ups. The last time he let someone try to hook him up, Jungkook had ended bringing him a hooker and he was not pleased. "Namjoon", the tone was warning, but the purple haired male rose his hands defensively, a nervous chuckle spilling from his lips. "Hyung, I swear It's not an excuse to hook you up with someone. I bothered to mention because it's the first time I've ever heard of any of Jimin's friends", he mentioned as a matter of factly and now that the black haired male thought about it, Namjoon had a point, but he chose not to ponder on the idea. Not like he'd get acquainted with said friend anyways. He took one last drag of his own cigarette before throwing it to the side and motioned for them to head upstairs. He hoped tonight he'd be relieved of his pent up stress ~~xXXx~~ Whoever thought that letting Namjoon feed Yoongi alcohol before going out, was an idiot. Who pre-games before going out for drinks. For DRINKS?!. But the younger male had always had a bad habit of drinking before going out and this time Yoongi didn't protest when the younger insisted they take a few shots. And well that turned into a competition and few minutes later you have two drunk males stumbling their way to the door. It was a surprise that they didn't kill themselves while dragging themselves down the stairs, an especially impressive feat for Namjoon. The male hadn't bothered to mention that they'd have to meet up at this club nearby and that they'd have to walk themselves there. It did help alleviate the heaviness of the alcohol in their system as they were allowed inside the club by the burly bouncer at the entrance. They guided themselves inside as the loud music hit their ears. From the corner of his eye, he managed to spot Jungkook and Jimin devouring each other shamelessly against the bar counter while a male beside them looked extremely awkward. It was to dark to see faces, but anyone could recognize Jimin's ass in leather pants. "Oi, you idiots. You're making him uncomfortable with you grossness", Yoongi scolded them as both males retracted from each other at the speed of light. Jimin looked like he wanted to correct Yoongi's word choice and sentence structure, but a simple glare was enough to keep him focused on being ashamed for his behavior when his friend was present. Stupid teachers and their incessant need to correct others or maybe that was just a thing for Jimin. "Sorry, hyung", Jungkook had murmured but the male didn't seem apologetic at all as a smirk was splayed on his lips. Yoongi was really tempted to slap it off his face, but unfortunately, he had a soft spot for the younger gross love birds. He finally turned to the male next to them and without really saying much, he'd ordered two drinks and was pulling the male to another of the bar's in the club. "Drink up. I'm sure those two scarred you", he motioned stil not looking at the male as he gulped down his drink and slid the other drink towards the male. He had shivered slightly from the strong bitter taste after downing it like water thinking he'd ordered something a little too strong. He finally looked up at his companion and felt his breathe hitch in his throat. The man was beautiful, no, gorgeous. Beautiful eyes decorated with full fluttering lashes some longer at the bottom. Nice tan skin and soft looking brown hair and his clothes were a tight black dress shirt and black leather pants. The male looked quite adorable as he looked terrified of the drink in his hand, so contradicting to the sex appeal he oozed just from what he wore. "Uh, t-thanks for helping m-me. I just...I'm not good with my liquor. I’m already buzzed", he murmured embarrassed by this fact as he took the glass and swished it a bit, licking his lips nervously. Yoongi chuckled as he leaned on the counter with one propped up elbow. "I mean, who cares. You gotta live a little, and what's the point of going out clubbing if you’re not gonna take a few risks”, Yoongi chuckled, his voice slightly slurring as he spoke. The younger male looked at him for a few seconds as a sad smile spread on his lips. “Don't you ever worry about regretting it later?” he asked and Yooni had to pause to compose his thoughts given that the alcohol was working in making him unable to properly think. He licked his lips and shrugged simply. “There’s a lot of things I regret, but you can't live with those regrets your whole life or even the day after because they don't let you move on; they hold you back. It’s better to know you lived and learned”, he explained surprised by his wholesome response despite, almost reaching a point of no return. The laughter and bright smile he was rewarded with was all the more rewarding and made him proud of his response as he found himself captivated by the male next to him. He gulped when he observed the way the male had brushed aside any further hesitance and downed his drink as well. Yoongi couldn’t help but let his gaze wander down to his neck where his adam’s apple bobbed as he drank, couldn't help watching the slight liquid that had spilled slightly over his lip until it trickled in a line down his throat. This man who looked staight out of a magazine, and desire pooled in his lower stomach. The slight innocence from this man was endearing and Yoongi wanted to drink that innocence himself. The brown haired male shook his head violently, sputtering slightly, a goofy smile on his lips. “Oh god! How did you m-make it seem s-so easy…that was strong!” He cooed and Yoongi wondered if the man was such a lightweight to the point that the drink had finished its job and was enough to fully inebriate the handsome man. For the next half hour, Yoongi was content to listening to the young man talk animatedly, amused at how easily alcohol had made the man lower down his guard completely. He liked to stare at his face as his eyes would widen when he talked about something's particularly exciting and how endearing his smile got when it was wide and boxy. He looked so familiar, a sense of deja vu consuming him. He made Yoongi nostalgic and he didn't even understand why. This stranger he knew nothing about was making him feel attached already. Why? He felt a finger poke his forehead as he felt himself flinch. Sweet giggles made him blink as he looked at the male in front of him. “You have this cute pout when you suddenly think”, the brown haired man chuckled, but the black haired male didn't miss that aroused way he’d said it. Didn't miss the fogged lust now in his eyes. Didn't miss when the male was oh so close to him, grasping onto his shirt like a lifeline. And surely didn't miss when Yoongi himself took the initiative himself to crash his lips desperately on the other’s. Their hands were fumbling to find their home on each other. The younger chose to tangle his hands in black locks and the elder’s hands took refuge tightly around the male’s waist, pulling him flush against him. Tongues met, teeth clashed every now and then, slightly clumsy from their drunken state, yet they had never felt more aware; more awake and living than in that moment. The younger had suddenly thrusted his hips a bit, his hardness brushing against Yoongi’s own, a groan escaping them both simultaneously. When they finally separated, Yoongi having released the other after his teeth had dragged on the male’s bottom lip, he took in the other male’s appearance again. He looked so utterly wrecked and just from making out. He was already sweating, lips bitten red and panting harshly, his face having a glowing flush to it. “Let’s get out of here. I live a few streets down”, he’d muttered in the male’s ear, passing a hand swiftly down from the male’s waist to slightly squeeze his ass. A mewl escaped the younger as he nodded vigorously grasping onto the elder’s wrist as he guided them out. “J-Jimin…he doesn't k-know”, the male began to say as they walked down the dimly lit dark streets. Yoongi brushed the comments aside muttering that he’d text him as he sent a quick message to Jimin and one to Namjoon, just in case. No longer had they managed to stumble up the stairs and into the apartment when their hands were on each other. No awkwardness involved as clothes were shed as they fidgeted into Yoongi’s room, avoiding from triping. No hesitation as their hands boldly touched and caressed. Yoongi worshiped the male beneath him marking his beautifully tan skin, its taste addicting, like a drug. The beautiful moans that had spilled from the younger’s lips were like music, music that yoongi wanted to hear more and more off, like a song on replay. Could get used to seeing the male like this and the utter realization that he was already whipped for this man, who he still knew nothing of, had him feeling strange. It was only at the peak of passion that Yoongi realized he didn't have a name from this beautiful man. As he held this gorgeous male who clung to him as though he’d go insane from the pleasure Yoongi was giving him. The elder kissed up his neck, whispering praises before he asked him. “Your name…I need your name”, he’d muttered, not withdrawing the speed of his thrusts. The other male panted and keened, but mumbled incoherently. Yoongi coerced him with gentle kisses, but his thrusts weren't making coherent thoughts possible for the male. “T-Taehyung…K-Kim Taehyung”, he cried clutching tighter around Yoongi, and suddenly Yoongi felt sober. It had to be coincidence right? He slowed down slightly, a whine escaping Taehyung’s lips. He opened his eyes questioningly and saw the intense gaze from the male above him. Yoongi had recognized it then. The smile and those eyes. How had he not seen it before? He had found a renewed energy as he thrusted at a ruthless pace once more, feeling his forgotten emotions from his past rising up again and fluttering in his chest warmly. To know he had his first love in his arms, and pouring all his passion into him. Having him unravel beautiful under his touch and him alone, filled him with pride. At the moment he didn't care for explanations. Could give lees fucks about why he had left in the moment because all that mattered was that he was her now and under him and amazing and so gorgeous. The answers would come later. His kisses had become more fervent and persistent, wanted to mark him more and more. Taehyung keened and begged, nails digging at his back, overwhelmed by everything he was feeling. A feeling he’d never experienced before and the male above him didn't need to know that. “Taetae”, Yoongi had dared to mumble in the male’s ear, a nickname he’d given this same person long ago. He felt Taehyung tighten around him even more as he looked at him eyes wide and shock. A slight feeling of recognition flashing to his eyes, as he panted. “who…ahhh fuck….who are you?” he’d moan, trying to keep himself thinking. “its me…Yoongi…Min Yoongi…your hyung”, he simply responded and Taehyung’s eyes suddenly teared up as he launched his arms around him, sobs escaping his lips. “H-Hyung! Yoongi hyung!”, he began to scream as though in a mantra as though Yoongi would suddenly vanish in thin air if he didn't. It was followed by apologies and so much longing. “Hyung…I’m close. Yoongi hyung…please”, he’d cried and Yoongi was too, but instead of saying anything, he’d simply kissed him passionately, all the loneliness and longing pouring into that one kissed as though it would be the last time. And they were both gone, coming together and tears were spilled, unspoken emotions lingering in the air, and there was no going back ~~xXXx~~ Days had passed since that day, Yoongi had woken up and Taehyung was gone. Not a trace left behind as though a repetition in history. “You look miserable, hyung”, Namjoon had said one particular afternoon while they were working in the shop. Yoongi had drowned himself in customers to tire himself out, making tattoo after tattoo to distract himself. All the while, his thoughts had gone to Taehyung who’d disappeared so suddenly and chose the most awkward of ways to come back to his life. Yoongi had realized that night, that he’d never stopped loving Taehyung. Because it was love, not just a crush like he’d previously thought. He shrugged and made a slight noise in response as Namjoon sighed. “Hyung, is it Jimin’s friend?” he had suddenly asked casually. Yoongi whipped his head at that and Namjoon knew he’d hit right on mark. Yoongi noticed his knowing look and frowned looking away, as he stood up straight from his crouching position to dispose of the black latex gloves he’s been wearing. “Yeah, it was”, he quietly admitted, hearing a slight hum. It was quiet then or at least it seemed like to them even when customers were still piling in. Yoongi walked behind the counter to retrieve a new set of gloves before Namjoon’s voice spoke up. “Go”, he’d said simply making the black haired male looking at him in confusion. “Go to him, hyung. I don't know what happened, but it obviously seems like you guys must of known each other before. So go before you end up regretting it”, he smiled, a warm and encouraging smile. Yoongi licked his lips nervously. “What aboutbthe customers?” he asked almost seeming to find an excuse to avoid this; to try and convince himself he shouldn't. “Hyung”, Namjoon dead panned. “Go. to. him. I’ll worry about the customers and you need to go and find your happiness!” No longer the words had left and Yoongi sprinted out the shop. He hated exercise more than he hated waking up, but there he was running as fast as he could while dialing Jimin.. “Hey hy-” “Where is he?” he interrupted the younger. “who? Hyung you okay?” Jimin muttered at the other end in concern. “Yes I’m fucking fantastic. And I meant Taehyung. Where is Taetae?” he breathed out quickly and almost out of breath. He really was gonna call out a cab or something, but time was money or well whatever it was for him. So he ran faster, pushing agaisnt crowds of people muttering quick apologies. “Oh, Tae’s with his kiddos! He should be teaching in his classroom. 103 A!” Jimin chirped not bothering to question why his hyung needed to see his best friend. Yoongi hung up, reminding himself to apologize to Jimin later as he saw the gates of the elementary school come to view. He felt gross and sweaty as he ran inside, relief invading him as he felt the cool air lf the AC hit him. He walked to the front desk, the secretary giving him a confused look as he struggled to breathe. “I…need to…see…Kim Taehyung”, he almost demanded as the nice desk lady only nodded with an almost knowing smile. Did all women have some sort of psychic intuition or some shit? He took the visitors pass and stuck the sticker on his chest crookedly, more preoccupied with finding the room and feeling stupid to see it's the first door straight ahead. He feels his heart begin to race as he approaches the door carefully, thankful for the small window showing the inside. And just as his eyes fell on the man he was looking for he felt his breath hitch. If he thought Taehyung was beautiful before, he seemed so gorgeous and ethereal when he was just himself. He wore a silk champagne long sleeve, slightly old fashioned, but elegant and classy on his frame, tucked into black pants a pair or cute red glasses perched on his strong nose, wide boxy smile on display as he animatedly talked to his children. Those glasses were the heaviest reminder of their childhood. He could fully see him clear as day and felt a warmth blooming in his chest seeing him soew laughter and giggles from his lips as his kids asked question after question and Yoongi was in love. There was a moment when Taehyung’s expression became neutral as though he felt watched and his eyes wandered to the door before his eyes widened immensely. He looked both ashamed and bashful and quickly averted his gaze, his mannerisms turning nervous and hesitant for the rest of the period. The kids ran out, yelling excited goodbyes of “Mr. Kim” as they ran down the halls, another teacher scolding them for running seconds after. Yoongi stepped inside the classroom as Taehying eyed him wearily, a prominent blush spread prettily across his tan cheeks. “H-Hyung…” he muttered. He looked about ready to cry. “You left that morning. Days ago. I wondered why”, Yoongi said simply as he looked around at the many drawing hanging from a string. Taehyung bit his lip, and the black haired male had caught the sight briefly trying to keep himself from biting that lips himself. The male before him was just adorable. “I just…I didn't think…I didn't think I deserved to be there”, he said suddenly, genuine words and worries. “I hurt you and left without saying anything. I was forced to leave because back then…i had feelings for you”, he confessed, looking away from Yoongi like he’d said something disgusting and felt ashamed. Yoongi’s eyes widened unable to control himself and more as he grabbed him by the shoulders and turned him before pushing him against the whiteboard. He felt his heart constrict painfully seeing those pretty eyes full of tears. “Where you that scared that you left?” Yoongi had asked and Taehyung shook his head slowly in disagreement. “No, I was going to confess…b-but my parents f-found out and t-they said that my feelings were a sin, thats it was unholy. They thought keeping me away and taking me someplace else would change that or ‘cure’ me, but…I…I could never forget you” he managed to say both confident and in shame. “And you don't have to…I’m here…And same as you I’ve always loved you. I need…no, i want you to be with me. Even then, I had feelings for you too”, Yoongi muttered burying his face in taehyung's neck, wanting to stick as close as possible. Taehyung sniffled his hands grasping tightly onto the elder’s shoulders desperately. “Hyung, I don't deserve to be loved by you…I…I”, he began to ramble hopelessly and no longer had Yoongi grasped his face and pressed his lips on the younger’s. A kiss yet again showing that Yoongi had forgiven him and loved him even more than he did before. Taehyung kissed back just as hard, hands pawing at his shoulders till he reached his hair. “Hyung…” “Whatever happened, happened. Remember what I said? That you shouldn't let regrets hold you back?” he muttered softly onto the male’s lips, receiving a soft nod. “Well you shouldn't blame yourself. I still love you. I still want you. More than ever”, “Really? Even after what I did?” “That wasn't your fault…Now say it. Say you’ll be mine, Taetae, and I’ll be yours”, he whispered like a prayer, hopefully, as he interlaced their fingers together. Taehyung’s teary face and wide smile was enough answer as he nodded vigorously. “Yes hyung. I’m all yours and you're mine”, he muttered before he leaned forward to catch Yoongi’s lips sweetly. Yoongi had never felt happier and even when Jimin had come in screaming in delight and to tease him, he couldn't bother to be angry or embarrassed. Not when the man he loved was at his side now and had laughed so beautifully, clutching onto him and hiding his face in his neck, bashful. He was finally and truly complete. It almost seemed ironic how opposite they were. Taehyung the cute, innocent and adorable teacher while Yoongi was that tough looking tattoo artist, an unlikely pair. But they were so content, Yoongi spending his breaks from work to take Taehyung some coffee and, when he was feeling rather sappy and gross, some flowers. It was rewarding to see the huge blush that swept his cheeks when he took the bouquet in his arms a bright and bashful smile ever present. Not that Yoongi was any different when Taehyung would come bouncing into his shop with a huge grin on his days off to bring some lunch for the elder. The way his expression soften as he approached with a bag in his hand and sweetly kiss him. Yoongi felt his face heat up in embarrassment and his stomach fill with butterflies everytime. His customers would coo over them and it was then that younger had realized his actions and become extremely flustered, cutely so. “I love you, hyung! See you later!” The younger would yelled waving dramatically after he went to leave as Yoongi smiled and returned the wave. Oh man, he was so whipped. Truly meeting Taehyung was something he would never regret. ((I hope it wasn't too bad rip ;;)

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becausegayisokay · 7 years

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1 through 85? Please?

1. Are looks important in a relationship? - I personally care way more about a person's character than their looks, but who doesn't like to have a girlfriend/boyfriend who's hot as fuck.2. Are relationships ever worth it? - Yes! Even if they don't work out, you never lose, you just learn. 3. Are you a virgin? - Nope. 4. Are you in a relationship? - Still not answering that question, because if I was, I wouldn't want anyone to try and ruin it. 5. Are you in love? - With food, yes. 6. Are you single this year? - That's basically the same as number 4, so same answer for that. 7. Can you commit to one person? - Right now? Maybe, in general? yes. 8. Describe your crush? - She's just the most beautiful human being I've ever laid my eyes on, so caring and sweet. 9. Describe your perfect mate? - I'd call my mates the perfect mates. They're always there for me but if I tell them I don't want to talk about it then they just let me be for a bit. They get drunk with me and accept when I don't feel like drinking. They're just amazing. 10. Do you believe in love at first sight? - I'm not sure to be honest, because I've never experienced it. 11. Do you ever want to get married? - I'd love to but it's not necessary, so it's basically up to my future girlfriend. 12. Do you forgive betrayal? - I do, even if I shouldn't. 13. Do you get jealous easily? - I do get jealous but not too easily. 14. Do you have a crush on anyone? - I already described my crush in number 8. so, yes. 15. Do you have any piercings? - Nope16. Do you have any tattoos? - No, not yet. 17. Do you like kissing in public? - I prefer kissing in private but I don't mind it. 18. Oh well just noticed 18 is missing. 19. and 19 is missing as well. 20. Do you shower everyday? - Pretty much, yes. 21. Do you think someone has feelings for you? - Idk, you tell me. 22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? - I also don't know, if you are, please tell me! 23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat? - I've never ever cheated on anyone and I never will. So, yes. 24. Do you think you'll be married in 5 years? - I doubt it, but who knows. 25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year? - Yes. 26. Has anyone told you they don't want to ever lose you? - Yes. 27. Has anyone ever wrote a song or poem for you? - Not that I know. 28. Have you ever been cheated on? - Yes. 29. Have you ever cheated on someone? - No and I never would. 30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body? - No but I'd still like to make my belly slimmer. 31. Have you ever cried over a girl/guy? - Yes. 32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love? - Yeah, it's not nice.33. Have you ever had sex wit a man? - Nope #goldstarlesbian34. Have you ever had sex with a woman? - Yes. 35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you? - Yes but only someone 2 years older than me. 36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends? - Yes. 37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? - Not that I know. 38. Have you ever liked someone you didn't expect to? - Do you ever expect to like someone? 39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn't have? - Yes, unfortunately. 40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone? - No, I suck at writing. 41. Have you hd sex so far this year? - Yes. 42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander? Depends.. 43. How long was your longest relationship? - about 8 months. 44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had? Boyfriends 2, girlfriends 3.45. How many people did you kiss im 2011? - 2011?! I can't really remember but either 0 or 1. 46. How many times did you have sex last year? - Quite a few times. 47. How old are you? 22 and a quarter. 48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? - I'd be sad but would wish them good luck and be happy for them. 49. If you have a girlfriend/boyfriend, what is your favourite thing about him/her? I always had loads of favourite things about my boyfriends/girlfriends. 50. If your first true love would knock on your door with apology and presents, would you accept? - My first true love and I are friends, nothing more, nothing less. No apology needed but I wouldn't take her back. 51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for? - I would only do absolutely everything for myself. I'd do a shit load for others but never everything. 52. Is there anyone you've given up on? why? - if you mean relationship wise, yes, my ex but that was ages ago. If you mean in general, no I don't think so. 53. Is there someone mad because you're dating/talking to the person you are? - Not that I know of, no one ever has been mad at me for me liking someone I think. 54. Is there someone you'll never forget? - Yes. 55. Share a relationship story? - Once upon a time I had a long distance relationship with my ex and I was at work for 13 hours one day and didn't go to hers afterwards (2 1/2 hour train ride), because I was tired af, then she was absolutely mad at me, went out and cheated on me, telling me it was all my own fault. The end. 56. State 8 facts about youe body? - (1) overweight (2) blue-grey eyes(3) small(4) dark blonde hair(5) big butt(6) big boobs(7) long hair(8) eyebrows not on fleek57. Things you want to say to an ex? - Thank you for everything. 58. What are five ways to win your heart? - (1) Just treat me right(2) Smile at me when I make you happy(3) Joke around (4) Don't lie to me(5) Just be yourself59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!) - Will post one in a minute. 60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners? - 2 years. 61. What is the first thing you notice in someone? - Their smile. 62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you? - Just treat me right and don't cheat on me, also be yourself. 63. What is your definition of having sex? - Just making someone cum I guess. 64. What is your definition of cheating? - I don't know if cuddling counts as cheating? I guess it depends on who you cuddle with but kisses, sexting and sex for sure.65. What is your favourite foreplay routine? - Don't have a favourite routine, I just let things happen. 66. What is your favourite role play? - I've never done roleplays. 67. What is your idea of the perfect date? - It's not about what or where it is, it is about the person you're with. 68. What is your sexual orientation? Girls only. 69. What turns you off? - When they just start talking about disgusting stuff. 70. What turns you on? - Neck kissing, making out, boob/ass grabbing. 71. What was your kinkiest wet dream? - I seriously can't remember. 72. What words do you like to hear during sex? - "Don't stop, I'm gonna cum". 73. What's something sweet you'd like someone to do for you? - I don't know, don't really have anything on my mind. 74. What's the most superficial characteristics you look for? - As English is only my second language I don't know what you want to know from me, if someone tells me I'll answer that later. 75. What's the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for you? - In a relationship, surprising me for my birthday. In general, my friends and family made a surprise welcome back party for me when I came back from living in England for one year. 76. What's the sweetest thing you've ever done for someone? - I don't know what people think are cute but I also surprise visited my ex for her birthday. 77. What's your opinion on age differences in relationships? - If the younger person is at least 16 thwy should be old enough to know themselves what's good for them. 78. What's your dirtiest secret? - I'm not too dirty tbh. 79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why? - Quite a whilw ago, because my girlfriend at the time went on holiday with her ex as they are friends. 80. When was the last time you told someone you love them? - Just told my mum. 81. Who are five people you find attractive? -(1) Justin Bieber #fangirling (2) Angelina Jolie(3) Emma Watson (4) Phoebe Tonkin(5) Cara Delevingne82. Who's the last person you hugged? - My best friend. 83. Who was your first kiss with? - My very first kiss was with my best friend in kindergarten, my first real kiss was with my ex boyfriend. 84. Why did your last relationship fail? - Because she cheated on me. 85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet? - Yes.

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tanzani-coil · 7 years

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gHANITH PLEASEEEE

yOU’RE THE BEST AAHHH OK

who hogs the duvettanith. you’ll find her in the morning with it wrapped around her, however when she wakes up she’ll always rearrange it so its draping over ghastly too and he’ll wake up for a few seconds to see it and he’ll smile and cuddle her and fall back to sleep again with them both under the covers

who texts/rings to check how their day is goingghASTLY. WITHOUT A DOUBT. i feel as though his average day is a bit less action packed than taniths, so he always has the time to check up on her - and if he doesnt have the time, he MAKES the time (you’ll find tipstaff grumbling about it somewhere)who’s the most creative when it comes to giftsi feel as though ghastly isn’t really into presents much, i mean being 400+ years old i can imagine coming up with presents got a bit old after the first century. and tanith i think on her jobs and journeys comes across like, not ‘gifts’ as such but little knick knacks and thingymabobs that she’ll know ghastly would just LOVE who gets up first in the morningghastly I think has settled into an (unhealthy) routine of going to bed at silly o’clock in the morning after really getting into something he was sewing, but then waking up quite early to start another working day. tanith usually stays up with him, sitting in the back room of his shop with him, both listening to ghastly’s blues playlist while he works, and then both of them going up to bed together at the same time. you wont see her out of bed any time before 9am, though (ghastly always makes her tea in the morning, regardless of whether shes likely to fall back to sleep again and never drink it)who suggests new things in bedyou’d think tanith, being the younger, more experienced one would be bringing new things into the bedroom but my god ghastlys has way more kinks than given credit for and taniths not complaining eitherwho cries at moviesman………… i feel like generally tanith does and as much as she’ll try to hide it ghastly always knowswho gives unprompted massagesTANITH. she’ll come in to the back room of the shop from the kitchen, cup of tea in hand for ghastly, she’ll look at what he’s working on and smile, see that he’s clearly been hunched over it for hours and massage his shoulder muscles. completely unasked for, but ghastly appreciates it all the same. she’ll always peck him on the cheek before leaving toowho fusses over the other when they’re sickghASTLY IS SO OVER TANITH’S HERO COMPLEX. HE DOESNT CARE HOW LONG AND FIERCELY SHE DEFENDS THAT SHE ISNT SICK. HE’LL STILL WRAP HER UP IN BLANKETS AND GIVE HER TEA WITH HONEY IN IT AND MEDICINE AND “STOP BLOODY MOTHERING ME” DOES ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO STOP IT. who gets jealous easiestaight, so like…. i’m gonna struggle to word this but bear with me. (also im really sorry) so like, in mortal coil when erskine is flirting with tanith we clearly see that ghastly got kinda down about it, but i dont think its jealousy?? its more of, whenever someone whos just that much better looking and that much better at everything than ghastly is comes along, ghastly sort of sinks into an instantly hopeless, acceptance and almost numb state and he just sort of gives up at whatever hes talking about, whatever hes doing. because thats just what hes been conditioned to do. 400+ years of constant rejection ALL THE TIME?? hes just learnt that the second someone better comes along, whatever chance he had is gone. the conversation he was having with someone is instantly cut short, and ghastly just doesnt exist anymore. completely invisible. every. time. so i think that rather than getting jealous about it he’s learnt to give up, and i think that it took tanith years to uncondition that response out of him because she’ll never, ever cut him off for someone else, and she’s sure as hell not going anywhere, so?? and everyone can see the transformation too. aight sorry i went on a tangent there but my point is, ghastly doesnt get jealous. tANITH. HOWEVER. MY GOD. when tanith gets jealous she doesnt just get jealous she gets jEALOUS. it takes tanith every ounce of will power not to get snappy defensive and the so, so unnecessary staring-downs. valkyrie never lets it slide and always finds it really, really funny (especially because its so bloody obvious that the jealousy is completely irrational because this is ghastly we’re on about)who has the most embarrassing taste in musicghastly has quite a solid, sensible mature playlist for when hes working or relaxing but tanith is like………….. look its tanith ok who collects something unusualtanith collects thingymabobs from where ever she’s at, but… she sort of leaves them all around the house. the conversations at this point aren’t even questionable anymore. “ghastly don’t suppose you’ve seen my demon-baby tooth anywhere?” “top shelf on the right, next to your brain muncher book.” “aight thanks.”who takes the longest to get readytanith, being brought up as a hidden blade, can be fully awake and ready to kill someone within 0.5 seconds of waking up. she can pull a tank top on, slip on trousers and boots and ready to go within two minutes. ghastly? god no getting ready is no joke he didnt make his own clothes only to look like an uninformed peasant with them on, no. he doesnt joke around when getting ready plzwho is the most tidy and organisedghastly. every bit of thread and fabric is organised by type and then category and then colour and then and then. he’s often found himself glancing up from whatever hes looking at to find tanith gazing at the walls of his shop, almost lost in the fabric - not that he’ll ever tell tanith thatwho gets most excited about the holidaystanith doesnt get batshit crazy but she’s gotten ghastly into celebrating christmas at least a tiny bit, even if it means just taking him out to a bar and taking shots its still fun y’know? better she figures than staying in and working.who is the big spoon/little spoonghastly is absolutely the big spoon, always wrapping his strong arms around tanith, keeping her warm. he tends to tuck his head into the crook of her neck, too. tanith doesnt even try to hide how much she loves itwho gets most competitive when playing games and/or sportstanith which i feel is p obvious we all know how she is when fighting. she has a secret love for board games and WILL NOT. LET. ANYONE. LEAVE WITHOUT FINISHING MONOPOLY. GODDAMN YOU’RE NOT HERE TO BE WEAK AND LEAVE HALF WAY THROUGH OK SHE’S HERE TO RIDE OUT THAT GAME TILL THE VERY ENDwho starts the most arguments….. um. oh man, ok. so like??? look tanith doesnt like authority and ghastly is stubborn as hell and arguments like… idk how to word it, i guess tanith can let an edge creep into her voice when she brings up the fact he is/was an elder and ghastly notices it every time and things get a bit tense and uncomfortable for a while but they let it go every time. i saw a post on here about how ghanith hardly argue and i 100% agree w that tbhwho suggests that they buy a petit was all valkyries fault. bringing back that gigantic german shepherd from america got tanith talking and now she wants a pet because shes fallen in love with this dog and she wants a pet but?? dogs are a lot of work and ghastly and tanith just dont have the lifestyle to take care of one, both of them being busy and flexible in when and how they work. thats when tanith sorta realises that a CAT, HOWEVER, (bECAUSE I’VE SEEN THAT POST SOMEONE DID ABOUT GHASTLY HAVING CATS AND!!!!!!!!!!! 10000% AGREE) would still be a pet of their own but independent enough to be ok with being on their own for periods of time and the cat will find its way into ghastlys work room and surprise him by either rubbing itself against his legs or actually jumping up onto his work space and then climb onto his hunched shoulders while he works. he grumbles about it and complains that theres cat hair everywhere but he wouldnt change it for the world. whenever tanith walks in the cat always greets her and she loves it.what couple traditions they havesteak is Their Thing™. ‘nuff said.what tv shows they watch togetherghastly kept going on about this tv show which tackles everything hes passionate about and it pin points exactly what goes on in work spaces which is pretty much fucking around 90% of the time and he has all of its seasons recorded on his tv recorder which he still hasnt gotten round to watching it all and finally tanith is curious enough to see what this amazing show really is like and she ended up falling in love with brooklyn nine nine really, really fast. and rosa diaz. big crush on rosa diaz from tanith.what other couple they hang out withvaldug naturallyhow they spend time together as a couplesee what I adore about their relationship is that it was p much built on the two of them just being so, so ridiculously comfortable in each others company and talking to each other for hours on end and just sort of being there for each other, and i think that (besides from hardcore sexy times obviously) they love to spend time doing their own things with /each other/. tanith’s found herself getting passionate about ghastlys work because she loves being with him while he does so, with him talking to her about his mother and the war and anything and everything.who made the first movetANITH W THE STEAK im gonna cry brbwho brings flowers homeghastly is a romantic shit but he’s never really had room for flowers amongst all of his delicate fabrics at home, but tanith will always find some from somewhere, even if they are just pretty weeds she picked from the field down the road, and take them home to put into a jug of water to sit on the kitchen window sill. who is the best cookghastly. tHE most domestic to ever domestic. he can cook and he can cook good. tanith can settle for pot noodles but shes thankful for his cooking nonetheless

TL;DR: i really, really need to get out more

#LONG POST IS LONG #ghanith #ghastly bespoke #tanith low #ask #sp

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larryaura · 7 years

Text

TAG GAME

SO MANY QUESTIONS OKAY........ if y’all ever wanted to know really useless shit about me, there u go. THANKS @semiautomaticlarry for tagging me because I love you and you’re the cutest you dumbass!!!!

rules: once you have been tagged you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. at the end, choose 25 people to tag!

LAST… [1] drink: water??? [2] phone call: my grandma, she’s so precious [3] text message: @fifthscarf13‘s youngest cousin cuz he had an issue with a girl..... love that boy

[4] song you listened to: I Feel It Coming by The Weeknd cuz I REALLY LOVE TO DANCE OKAY

[5] time you cried: yesterday while watching Arrival, that movie fucked up my head wtf

HAVE YOU EVER… [6] dated someone twice: I HAVEN’T EVEN DATED SOMEONE ONCE, AND YOU’RE ASKING ME TWICE??????? [7] been cheated on: thankfully no but just bc i never dated anyone lmao [8] kissed someone and regretted it: I regret kissing my puppy now she’s always kissing me thinking I belong to her goddamnit..... (i’ve never kissed anyone OKAY) (and yes i do belong to my puppy) [9] lost someone special: well yes people change [10] been depressed: honestly I don’t know if I’ve been depressed but I’ve felt really bad during a certain period of my life [11] gotten drunk and thrown up: closest to drunk that i’ve been was feeling everything really light and being really happy, so no

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS: [12] grey [13] black [14] white (yeah okay I know I’m lame I like red too)

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… [15] made new friends: THANK GOD YEAH [16] fallen out of love: ha bitch you thought I’m dead inside [17] laughed until you cried: YES [18] found out someone was talking about you: hum yeah and not always in the best way [19] met someone who changed you: not really [20] found out who your true friends are: yep [21] kissed someone on your facebook list: I swear these kissing questions are making me feel really bad

GENERAL… [22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them or most of them [23] do you have any pets: YES FINALLY!! I have 2 dogs and a cat, and they are literally my life okay??? IM SO GLAD THERE’S A QUESTION ABOUT THIS [24] do you want to change your name: eh haven’t thought much about it so no [25] what did you do for your last birthday: is it weird that I don’t remember??? oh yes it was a school day so nothing I guess [26] what time did you wake up: 10 ish [27] what were you doing at midnight last night: watching Arrival/thinking about the movie in bed [28] name something you cannot wait for: being free [29] when was the last time you saw your mother: she was here some minutes ago and got pissed at me because I’m always using the same pairs of socks... so nice right [30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: I’m thankful about my life but I would really to make my parents less strict/overprotective [31] what are you listening to right now: the sound of this hella old computer [32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: no but I would love to meet you tom [33] something that is getting on your nerves: school and popular people cuz I’m basic [34] most visited website: instagram [35] elementary: years of pure cringe and horror [36] high school: eh still cringe and horror [37] college: I DON’T KNOW OH GOD *curls in a ball and cries* [38] hair colour: brown [39] long or short hair: loooooong [40] do you have a crush on someone: nope I told you I’m dead inside [41] what do you like about yourself? I HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT THIS IS DEPRESSING HUM I like my eyes [42] piercings: none [43]blood type: i don’t fucking know and YES IT’S MY MUMS FAULT SHE NEGLECTS ME [44] nickname: i don’t have one but my dad used to call me lion bc of my crazy hair

[45] relationship status: single and dead :)

[46] zodiac sign: Aries [47] pronouns: She/her [48] fav tv show: bones and criminal minds are bomb, and I like the simpsons too [49] tattoos: none [50] right or left handed: Right

FIRST… [51] surgery: none wow [52] piercing: none [53] best friend: a girl in my class that switched me for another girl :( [54] sport: ballet I think or swimming [55] vacation: i have no idea [56] pair of trainers: I THINK I HAD ADIDAS I WAS SUCH A BASIC BABY

RIGHT NOW… [57] eating: nothing [58] drinking: nothing [59] i’m about to: do something really unexpected cuz I’m cool [60] listening to: my depressive thoughts :) [62] want: my puppy next to me, food, a boyfriend, a party? and a mojito cuz damn those are good [63] get married: HA *cries* [64] career: I don’t know I just wanna be happy tbh

WHICH IS BETTER…

[65] hugs or kisses: that’s just sad *sigh* hugs [66] lips or eyes: eyes [67] shorter or taller: taller [68] older or younger: older omg [69] romantic or spontaneous: spontaneous who the hell wants sappy romantic shit even wtf [70] nice arms or nice stomach: damnit idk stomach i guess [71] sensitive or loud: depends, but sensitive [72] hook up or relationship: I really don’t fucking know but right now I want a relationship [73] troublemaker or hesitant: troublemakers bc I’m the hesitant one

HAVE YOU EVER… [74] kissed a stranger? this is getting annoying IVE NEVER KISSED ANYONE [75] drank hard liquor? I think so [76] lost glasses/contact lenses? I don’t have them [77] turned someone down: probably more than I know of [78] sex on first date? take a wild guess [79] broken someone’s heart? not on purpose but I don’t regret it cuz then he was an ass to me [80] had your own heart broken? I TRIED NOT TO BUT IT JUST KINDA HAPPENED WTF [81] been arrested? nah [82] cried when someone died? I cry when people die even if I don’t know them [83] fallen for a friend: no

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself? not really? [85] miracles? depends [86] love at first sight? nah, I don’t even have love at second or third sight lmao [87] santa claus? what is there to believe in santa claus, isn’t he obviously real [88] kiss on the first date? hum there’s probably someone out there who has experienced this right [89] angels? yeah

OTHER… [90] current best friend’s name: @fifthscarf13 and @semiautomaticlarry bc y’all are cool enough to have a tumblr okay i love you [91] eye colour: green/hazel [92] favourite movie: go watch “equals” IT’S BEAUTIFUL

I made it out alive after 92 questions and a lot of them with kissing I DON’T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT. Anyways, I’m tagging @fifthscarf13 bc you’re the only person that I have left wow I’m such a good friend and tumblr says @larryscunt is one of my biggest fans so hi I love your blog I’m tagging you???? and hell no I’m not tagging 25 people poor them

#mine #about me

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ideocosmonaut · 6 years

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surveyzzz

When was the last time you went in the car past midnight? Gosh it had to have been sometime early this year driving home from an after party So, you have brown eyes? Nope What was the last thing you ate? Chocolate pretzels Can you say you’re happy? No but I manage

What’s bothering you right now? Mostly anxiety and loneliness

Who was the last person to text you? A friend What are you drinking right now? Nothing What all did you do today? I got groceries and went to a little thing called Weekend of the Witches. And I worked on some art. Why did you last laugh really hard? I dont remember How is your hair? Freshly cut Could things possibly get any better? I hope so How are you feeling at the moment? A bit tired Do you have feelings for someone? Yes What was for dinner tonight? Chips and onion dip lol Would you be able to name everyone you kissed? Yeah that’s easy Are you in a good mood? Im okay Where is the last person you kissed? Im not sure What color shirt are you wearing? N/a Do you think you could ever make it as a rap singer? Nope How important are looks to you? Important if I’m actively looking for someone. It’s what causes me to interact. But if I get to know someone first, say through work or friends, and then fall for them, then it doesnt matter what they look like. Did you have a fling this summer but it didn’t really go anywhere? Nope Do you get jealous? A bit Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? I kissed my mom on the forehead when she died, if that counts. What is something you currently want? Love and warmth. Security. Affection. What was the last thing you bought? Groceries What was the weather like today? Rainy Do you like sushi? Love it Is your hair longer than your shoulders? No Ever kissed anyone with a nipple piercing? No What about a lip piercing? No Nose piercing? No Do you like your hair? It’s alright Have you ever kissed someone who had a boyfriend/girlfriend? No Did you like kissing the last person you kissed or the one before that more? I dunno man Ever made out in a pool? No The shirt you’re wearing, does anyone else have it? N/a What was the last movie you watched? Scott Pilgrim vs The World

What do you usually get on a sub? Whatever comes on a cuban, I’m not sure. Some kind of meat, cheese, pickles, mayo and mustard.

Do your lips taste like anything right now? Maybe onions...

Are you an annoyed big sibling or annoying little sibling? (Or neither…) A distant big sibling

Do you have a pair of those ‘nerd’ glasses? Yes

Have you ever watched the Glee Project? No

When does school start for you? Never

Who is always there for you? My friends usually

What ticks you off? Bullying and blaming without evidence

Where is the last place you were other then where you are right now? A place called Southern Trash

Why do you act the way you do? Cuz they dont think it be like it is, but it do

How do you feel about the last person you kissed? Well I love my mom

When are you the happiest? While traveling and experiencing cities and countries for the first time

Who do you get along with the best? My friends

What color is your remote control for the main TV you watch? Black

Where is your heart currently at? My left side

Why do you usually laugh — something funny happened or someone got hurt? Something funny happened wtf

How are you feeling today? Meh

When is your birthday? Sept 17

What do you spend most of your money on: Food, clothes, etc. ? Aside from bills, food

Is there anything around your neck right now? Nope

Do you ever feel like you’re alone in this world? Kind of in a way

Don’t you just adore Simple Plan? No

Lol, Lawl, Rotfl, Lmao, or Lmfao? (Which you use most) Lol

Do you ever watch info-mercials for fun? Sometimes

Where do you usually shop at? Publix

When do/did you turn 21? 2006

Are friendship bracelets cool? (Even if they’re not for a friendship) Maybe. Nostalgia is big

Have you/Do you know anyone that grows weed? Yeah

Do you really care about namebrands? Unfortunately. I have to avoid a lot of big names in favor of other specific names because of my size

Describe your favorite pair of jeans to me please. Tapered

Do you think it means more if someone takes the time to type: I love you; rather then ILY? Sure

To wash in the shower, do you use a loofa? No

What brand is your shampoo? I forget. It’s some tea tree shit

Have you ever ridden on a horse? Yes

How many questions make a survey too long? Like 1000

Do you know what ‘savvy’ means? Kind of

Ever get a craving for a salad? I do. Sometimes

Who’s your favorite celebrity? Bill Murray probably

Which is better: Facebook, Twitter, tumblr, Myspace or Skype? They’re all terrible wastes of time imo. But I enjoy making my friends laugh with memes on FB

Does it bug you when people do things to try and bug you?

Yes

Do you like going to Borders?

What?

Is your local Borders shutting down? Mine is. Huh?

Little dogs: Cute or annoying? Depends

Is there a dream catcher in your room? No

Do storms scare or fascinate you? I like them

Are you polite? Usually, unless someone isnt

Ever been so tired a part of your body hurt? Yes

Did you ever pretend you were someone else as a favor for a friend? Not as a favor... Do you think men prefer curvy women or skinny women? I think they like a lot of different things Do you own a water gun? Somewhere What item most embarrasses you to purchase? Junk food

Do you know any actual dances or do you just move to the music? I just move baby

Do you eat pork and beans? I have What is the last thing you referred to as legit? Who knows Do you give cards to people for holidays or events? No I dont understand why thats a thing

Do you have anything hanging from the ceiling of your room? Nope Name the coolest thing about one of your grandparents. My dad’s dad lost a finger in the Navy. My mom’s dad was in Knights of Columbus and left me his sword. Which do you prefer, doctor or dentist? I’ve met nicer dentists, oddly Are any walls of your room blank? Yes What color are your favorite shoes? Black If someone was willing to tell the person you like that you liked them, would you let them? I already have Do you know the zodiac signs of your friends? Not since they added the new one Do you drink any hot beverages? What? Tea sometimes Name two things you put whipped cream on? Frappes and Strawberry shortcake Who is the last person who saw you with bare feet? My friends Do you ever eat peanut butter straight from the jar? If its mine Do you know how to ride a bike? Do you own one? Yes and no What was the last pill you took for? Pain Any friends you only know online? Kind of Do you ever talk to your next door neighbor? Nope

Did anything shock you today? Like all the shelves in Publix. Zapped me a bunch of times. Are you wearing a hoodie right now? No Do you prefer your clothes loose or close fitting? I like loose but it doesnt look good on me Are your favorite pants jeans? Pants are the devil Favorite thing you’ve ever painted? I dont really paint. Id like to Are there any songs that remind you of your mother? Yes If you had a sister, would you prefer her older or younger? Why? I do What is something you wanted to say today, but didn’t? Nothing I guess

What’s the last thing you panicked about? Im not sure. I think nicotine used to raise my blood pressure sky high and cause me to have a panic attack so I had to quit smoking. What do you have planned out as a career? Nothing. I only plan to die so far Are you planning any special outings with family or friends? Kind of

Which word(s) do you generally use to describe someone attractive? (e.g. “fit”, “sexy” etc.) Gorgeous

What was the last alcoholic drink you tried for the first time? Did you like it? Sam Adams Oktoberfest. It’s alright Who is that last person who harassed and annoyed you? Some internet pleb Who is the last person who made you feel hurt? Some friends... What was the last thing you were worried about? Dying alone probably. It’s always there What time of day feels the most magical to you? 3 am What is the last physical ailment you took medication for? Headache Do you get motion sickness? I used to Who is the cutest baby you know? Dante. RIP Have you ever thrown a rock at a window? Probably Has anyone ever thrown a rock at your window? Maybe Does your hair react well to dye, or does it damage it? I dunno What kind of pet do you wish you had? A living plushie that doesnt need to eat or pee. And also doesnt feel the need to murder... When was the last time you had an argument with one of your parents? Years ago Do you still live at home or with a guardian of some sort? If so, when do you plan on moving out, if ever? If you have moved out, how did your relationship to your parents change after that? No, I saw them a lot less but I still love them

When was the last time you were diagnosed with something? Are you concerned about anything regarding your physical or mental health at the moment? Years ago. Yeah but I’m an idiot and a hypochondriac What’s the longest you’ve gone without talking to other people? How did this affect you? Couple days. Happens sometimes on weekends What is one blanket judgment you tend to make about people (like, you judge all people who live at home, all people who drink, etc)? Does this judgment come from a particular personal experience? I try not to judge anyone really. I do playfully but not realistically. Everyone has their reasons, whether they be right or wrong and usually people just judge them instead of trying to learn about why they are that way and maybe help them. Like prisoners. People are people. Most are misunderstood or ignorant. What is something seemingly small and inconsequential that will cause you to avoid a person? If I do something to upset them

How do you react to other people yelling or slamming doors? Is this something you ever do too? It happened a lot in my childhood. I’d rather just not get angry but it happens. One second of anger usually costs me a weeks worth of apologies. It’s a tad expensive. Who in your life do you get along with best? How about the least? How often do you have to interact with these people? My best friend. My boss. Usually a lot Have you ever lost your cool at work or somewhere else important? What happened as a result? Yeah. Got reprimanded. Shock and awe. Was a long, long time ago.

When was the last time you did something you knew was wrong? What about the last time you did something right just because it was right? Morally? Or just like running a red light? I do little things all the time. I’m not perfect. Morally, umm hmm... I’m not sure. Probably not since I was a teenager. I hold doors for people all the time. I donate sometimes. I tend to stay in the middle mostly. Zen. Ying and yang.

When you do good things, do you do them because you want some sort of reward or recognition or do you do them just for the sake of being good? I just enjoy being nice. I do all the little things I can think of. When you fill out social media bios and such, how do you typically describe yourself? Is describing yourself something you have a difficult time doing? Yeah actually. I usually just end up deflecting with dumb comedic phrases What is one unusual belief you have? Has anyone ever made fun of you for your beliefs? I dont have any unusual beliefs. Ive always said I’d take up scientology for the perks though lol Have you taken anyone’s virginity? No Who has the power to break you? Feels like everyone but I know its just me How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? A few What’s one thing about you people wouldn’t expect? Idk. I’m kind of a robosexual Have you ever been in therapy? Are you now? Do you think you always will be, or do you think there will come a time when you don’t need it anymore? No but I should be What is the most dangerous thing you do on a regular basis? Probably eat junk food. I used to self-harm but it wasnt really dangerous. I suppose my thoughts can be considered dangerous then Have you ever been in a hospital and not felt safe? No

Is anyone in your family blind? No What’s your favorite gaming system? PC

Is your more photogenic side your left or right? Idk they’re both kinda fug Do you believe in evolution? Yes What job do you think people should be paid the most for? Any job that puts you directly into harms way, followed by jobs that involve removing people from harms way. Have you ever seen a tornado in real life? From a distance What was your favorite stuffed animal as a kid? What was it named? A T-Rex my dad got me from a business trip. He didnt have a name Were you ever held back a year in school? Did you ever skip a grade? Nope Have you ever been given a hickey? Have you given one? No Who was the last person to kiss your cheek? My aunt I guess Where’s the farthest you’ve been from home? Maine

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mommamouf · 6 years

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Sista

Im At work doin my work shit and decided id greet customers today. One particular customer walked in, I gave her a very happy and welcoming greeting and she kind of brushed me off. I didn't trip off of it just went back to doin what I was doin. So the same customer later on ask me about this sale. So I'm like I'm not sure let me go ask. She stops me and is like "do you know me?" I smiled and politely said no but in my head I'm like FUCK this some chic from high school or a party and idk wtf I did. So she goes "I'm so nd so and so nd so's sister" tool me Hellas cuz I'm in party brain memory and then it hit me. MY SISTER'S SISTER! MY sister. My actual real life older sister.

So the thing is i always wanted more siblings. I didn't really like being the oldest, my younger sister might be part demon. So when I was younger my mom would tell me all the time "I got an older brother and sisters out there somewhere" and the thought of it really use to excite me. Never actually planned on meeting them one day and now these mf just KEEP poppin up.

Anyways she went for a handshake and I hugged her instead (I was excited) we talked for two seconds. She said how she sees me all the time but never knew what to say. They all did actually. They'd see and know me cuz I think they looked it up one day or sum shit. Point is tgey would know but never say hi. I'm glad they all finally did/do.

So nearing the end of our convo she goes "You didn't miss out on anything" with this very sincere look. And it took me a min to understand what she meant. She was talking about HIM. She's the oldest so she saw and actually experienced my our father. I on the other hand have only seen a picture of the man. And she kinda kept saying it. I guess trying to comfort that kid in me but the thing is I'm not longing for him and i guess I always knew there was nothing i missed out on. Yeah as a kid I had my days where it's was like damn I really wish he was around but that was mainly for my mom. I felt like life would be a whole lot easier if he was around to help her and if be less of a burden. My sister's dad wasnt around but he was still "involved" as much as he could be. But I didn't miss him or want him around. He NEVER once made the effort to see me and I got over that at a young age. Like you do wanna meet me or even see me cool, now I know you dont give af so aint no point of me feeling those extra ads emotions. He was sloppy and gross enough to have a whole family, cheat and get two women pregnant at the same time. Again, one of my sisters is only 5 DAYS older than me. So again that speaks for your character. And to find out he walked out on his kids while they were young and never came back. At that point my mind was set. I was waaaaaaay better off without him and I might even have gotten lucky by not knowing him at all. It's just that the way she said it makes it seem like some bad shit went down. She even said his brothers are good ppl but him and the rest of his family are not. Now my curiosity has peaked and I just want to know more. Like what is this other side like. Anyways I thought it was cool but a part of me also feels like they(my siblings) aren't as interested in developing a relationship with me as I am with them. Then again that could be my paranoia.

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foulfurywombat-blog · 6 years

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Does anyone know any cheap car insurance so i can put my 19 year old on my insurance.?

"Does anyone know any cheap car insurance so i can put my 19 year old on my insurance.?

I have a 19 Year old who is really eager to drive. so ive decided to put him on my insurance but who im with at the minute i would need to get a mortgage to pay for it. Does anyone known any cheap insurance company's?? hes only got a provisional licences and hes had it for 2 and a half years.

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://financeandcreditsolution.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr