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#putting my journalism degree to very good use
httpstes · 1 year
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Observations of the Mercury placements
This is kind of like a pt.2 to the mini observations of the moon signs that I posted to my second account. I would’ve posted this there but I honestly don’t think i’ll make anymore astrology posts on that account. I’ll link it for those who want to see :) Mini observations of the moon signs. I might add more onto this as time goes on :D
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Mercury in 5H may be very interested in art, history, literature ect.
Mercury in 5H also know how to have a good time, like literally, they make conversations so fun and easy, esp for people who struggle to continue conversations.
Mercurial dominants are for some reason similar to uranus doms imo. However Uranus is more about change and revolution meanwhile mercury is more intellect and personal power.
Mercurial dominants are really easy to spot, they’re very eccentric yet sophisticated. They look all over the place but put together at the same time. They’re really unique individuals.
Mercury in Cancer relies on past experiences/knowledge to help them in tough situations.
I noticed they may find it hard to improvise on the spot. And though Cancer mercurians do have strong intuition, it’s hard for these individuals to decipher whether it’s intuition or if they’re overthinking it.
Mercury in 4H may write/create deep and emotional pieces that can resonate with a lot of people and their childhoods.
Mercury in Cancer at an Aries degree might come off as petty or vengeful. I know many cancer mercuries that have an Aries degree on it, and god these people like drama 😭
Mercury in Aquarius could be into alternative/grunge music.
Not to be stereotypical or anything, but taurus mercuries/mercury in the 2H do have very beautiful voices. Even if they don’t believe it themselves, their voices are so soothing to hear, they sound poised and elegant lol.
Scorpio mercuries analyse EVERYTHING. Every small thing, they will dissect and uncover istg. They’re also good at getting to the root of a problem in any dynamic/situation. This is due to their good analysis skills as well as emotional intelligence.
Mercury in 10H, similar to 1H, look like smart individuals. Except unlike the first house, mercurial qualities aren’t apart of their personality (unless ofc they have a virgo/gemini rising, major mercurial influence) Mercury in 10H individuals look smart and put together when out in public but people who are close to them know they are actually really scatter brained🙏
Mercury in Capricorn have dry humour, and i love it. They are very sarcastic individuals and I love them for it.
Mercury in 11H individuals are social butterflies even if they don’t think so themselves. They always manage to get on peoples good sides without even doing anything.
Mercury in 11H can manifest easily through communication, writing and visualisation.
Yeah. Libra mercuries are very balanced people. Mentally at least. They really do want the best for everyone and want a fair playing field for all. These individuals could be heavily involved in protests for equal rights, and they enjoy bringing attention to things that need to be talked more about in society.
Libra mercuries are also really funny people, ESP IF THEY HAVE AQUARIUS PLACEMENTS!!
Mercury in 12H could come off as very shy people. Of course this is dependant on the sign mercury is in and the aspects made to it, however I noticed most Mercury in 12H at first really come off as quiet.
Mercury in 12H also may be very detached mentally. They could be more attached and grounded in their imagination. These are the types of people who have dreams that really drain them in their waking life. It’s like their dreams have a huge mental impact on them. Ik many ppl with this placement who use a dream journal as well.
imo the most emotionally/intellectually mature mercury placements are scorpio/cancer/aquarius/taurus mercuries, 8H/3H/10H Mercuries and Moon-Mercury, Jupiter Mercury aspects
Leo and Gemini mercuries are so cool istg. I love how vibrant you guys are when you talk. Leo is very entertaining to listen to (this highkey applies to sagittarius mercury as well) and they’re just so funny to watch LMAO. Many Gemini mercuries I have met are actually really jittery and like move a lot when they talk, lots of them barely hold eye contact with me either it’s so cute. Some of them actually may struggle with speaking out loud in front of people but they are extremely talented writers.
Interest in writing/Talented at writing = Venus/Moon/Mercury/Jupiter in 3H as well as Sun/Venus/Moon/Jupiter conj Mercury.
I also feel like Saturn in 3H may enjoy writing but they may have struggled a lot with english or communication as a kid but grew to like it as they aged.
this is a very random assumption I just made, but maybe saturn in 3H have really well structured writing ? I feel like they would be really good at essay writing and exam prep, because they won’t go off topic or anything, they can keep things short and concise while also describing things in detail.
Meanwhile Venus in 3H may have a very soft and delicate writing style. The words they use are unique and really paint a picture inside the readers mind.
Mars 3H might be good at persuasive writing/speeches. Could be good at making eye catching advertisements, good catch phrases, y’all should get into marketing or sumn.
Fixed mercuries are the types to stand up strongly for what they believe in and i admire this wholeheartedly.
3H Moon may have lots of writing pieces that are perceived as very emotional and deep.
Uranus in 3H may be interested in and good at all types of writing. They get bored of sticking to one topic so they may struggle writing essays.
Pluto 3H may have very dark ideas that they can easily put onto the page. Traumas they have experienced, or any issues that they have in their lives can be written in a beautiful manner by these individuals.
Ok im done with my 3H/writing tangent 😭
Maybe this is just me, but i notice you attract a lot of individuals with mercury placements that are extremely similar to yours. For example, many of my friends have Cancer mercuries, I am a cancer mercury myself. I have a 3H mercury and I attract a lot of people who have mercuries in air houses, no matter the sign. (Air houses = 3H/Gemini, 7H/Libra, 11H/Aquarius)
Mercury-Neptune I feel is similar to 12H Mercury, these individuals could have very vivid imaginations, ones that they easily can get lost in.
I feel as though many people misinterpret mercury in 12H/Neptune-mercury’s words.
Capricorn Mercuries have a really monotone sounding voice ? Think text-speech voice on tiktok but more human like ?? 😭 I MEAN THIS IN A GOOD WAY. Because they have a very ‘matter of fact’ type of voice it makes me want to listen to them and take whatever they’re saying seriously. I’m on the floor for you guys atp, if I have to, I will lower my standards for you
Mercury in 4H may have been seen as the smart child in the family.
Mercury in 4H may also write really deep literature/lyrics that resonates with many individuals childhoods.
Mercury in Sagittarius, are blunt in the best way possible. Mercury in Sag are really good at explaining things and giving advice as well. (This is esp true if their mercury is in an earth house, ie. 2H/6H/10H)
Many Mercury in Sag individuals are also powerful speakers, this is because many people with this placement in my generation have their Mercury conj Pluto.
Mercury in Taurus take a while to learn things, this does not mean they are slow in the head, actually quite opposite. They’re very strategic and work at their own pace, and even though to others it seems like they’re taking their sweet time, they are building up a lot behind the scenes and turn out to be ones that are the best in their profession. Definition of work smart not hard. Plus they do all of this in such a aesthetically pleasing way 😭
Mercury in 8H can make very beautiful and meaningful art. Whether it be music, paintings, literature, makeup and fashion, they always know how to reach deep within themselves and pour out the most authentic work.
As a 3H Mercury and Gemini Venus, I LOVEE Sag mercuries/9H Mercury placements/Mercury-Jupiter. I always learn something new from these individuals and they’re like my other half. My bestfriend has this placement and even though we’re quite different, we’re very mentally compatible for each other. She takes in information, analyses it, then spews it out for me to learn and understand. This is the best way I can describe it🙏
Gemini-Sag Mercurial placements (Any sag/gemini placements tbh) = teacher/student dynamic, in the least weird way possible LMAOO.
Pisces mercury individuals are very, very imaginative people. Esp when placed in the 11/5H. Pisces mercury in 11H makes these individuals big dreamers who daydream about the things they constantly want. Pisces mercury in 5H daydream about new and different things that they think are fun and may struggle to commit to one single idea/creative outlet.
Mercury in Aries are so authentically themselves. They don’t talk/say things to please other people, they say it because they want to. They always rely on their mind in the end, very independent individuals.
Mercury in 7H could be very relationship oriented and constantly are wanting to please others
Fixed mercuries are stubborn in terms of their beliefs and mindset. I’ve noticed these individuals find it hard to to analyse situations from another perspective as their opinion on the matter is what matters most. Out of all fixed signs though scorpio and Aquarius seem to be more open minded.
Cardinal Mercuries are the ones to speak up in class and actually raise their hands when everyone else is too afraid to.
Mutable mercuries, understandably are the individuals with the most easy going mindset. They find it easy to accept others beliefs even if those beliefs are highly criticised. Though, this does have its downside as mutable mercuries may change their opinions often and struggle to form strong opinions on different things in life.
Virgo mercuries may be very organised when speaking. They could overthink before even saying anything, so they go over everything and make sure that what they’re going to say is well structured and makes sense.
People who have Mercury in the 1st house look smart. Like i’m telling you every single person I’ve met who has this placement, look extremely punctual and intelligent.
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mymanyfandomramblings · 5 months
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Mabel's perspective in Sock Opera is equally, if not more sympathetic than Dipper's: An Essay
Most people generally wouldn't consider Mabel to have a terribly sympathetic plotline in Sock Opera, even those of us who don't necessarily feel that she's horribly selfish. I think that's because, from a narrative perspective, her plotline is (as it so often is) shafted in favour of Dipper's, and from a viewer's perspective, Dipper's makes more sense. We, as viewers want to know who the author is. We, as viewers, know that Gabe is inevitably going to turn out to be some variety of impossible, and we know that the Author of the Journals is a major mystery. However, from Mabel's perspective, none of this is true, because she doesn't have the luxury of knowing she is in a TV show. Even if you take out Gabe, her perspective still makes perfect sense.
At the beginning of summer, Dipper found this journal, and Mabel has generally been pretty happy to go along with his adventures as the journal has led them, but it's clear she doesn't have the same degree of fascination with it. Maybe she may have been a little intrigued by who the Author is, she's probably a bit curious, but not to the same extent. By the time of Sock Opera, she's probably reasonably ready for the Journal fixation to be over, considering that they nearly all got killed by a shapeshifter trying to find the author. She knows that trying to investigate the author is dangerous--Stan warned them away from the supernatural, they've all nearly died multiple times, but Dipper cannot be stopped. And now Dipper has decided to spend hours and hours and hours, forgoing sleep, sitting in front of a screen, typing in passwords. The fact that Mabel tries to drag him away from it is a good thing--anyone with a relative who spends excessive amounts of time in front of a computer can tell you that. Generally, having someone close to you become deeply fixated to the point of obsession with anything can be challenging, however in Mabel's case, Dipper has become obsessed to the point of prioritising getting into the laptop above anything, and this isn't just a regular hyperfixation: this is a hyperfixation that has nearly gotten them both (plus their loved ones) nearly killed multiple times in the last few weeks. It's absolutely the responsible, good thing for Mabel to do to not enable that behaviour.
And then if you add the puppet show back into the equation, then yes, it is kind of ridiculous of Mabel to put on a whole show of that kind of magnitude just for a boy (regardless of whether the boy deserves it), however, as viewers we must accept that this is, in fact, thoroughly within character for Mabel, who is kind of ridiculous. Any kind of production of that size is a huge commitment, especially if you've given yourself a week to work, and I'm not remotely bothered by the fact that Mabel has to get everyone involved on this. And to Mabel's credit, she does try to help Dipper as soon as he appears to her in puppet form, she just isn't immediately willing to stop the show. Back in high school, my drama class did a play that I mostly wrote, mostly managed and also had a small acting role in (yes, I was an overachiever in drama), and let me tell you, it would have taken a lot to have gotten me to call off the show halfway through, much less publicly sabotage it. A demon threatening the lives of one of my siblings? Probably yes. That probably would have done it. And Mabel does allow the thing that she poured blood, sweat and tears into to go literally up in flames in front of everyone, once she realises that's what she has to do (and personally, I don't think that there's anything wrong with not immediately being willing to drop everything for this. It's not like Dipper doesn't dig in his heels about doing what's best until the very last possible second). I don't know why people insist it's not 'technically a sacrifice', because while, yes, obviously Dipper's life was more important, and she 100% made the right choice, it's not easy to wreck something you worked hard on in front of people.
All this is to say that although it's easy to become irritated at Mabel during this episode because she's hindering Dipper's ability to figure out who the author is, it's also very easy not to realise that she has a thoroughly reasonable perspective, simply because the narrative puts greater emphasis and attention of Dipper's perspective.
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bomberqueen17 · 2 months
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*vibrating slightly in place*
So ok. When I was in kindergarten, my classroom was arranged so that four desks were linked together, so we were in little groups. I used to regularly vibrate my desk and the three it was attached to, with three other children in them, across several feet of floor space, until the linked desks ran into the teacher's desk, which was larger and did not move with the force of my vibrations. I was a good student, but hard to control, and markedly uneven in my ability to like. Do anything. "Well," my mom said once, upon beholding my entire spectrum of a report card, "we'd just hate to be bored."
When I graduated with my bachelor's degree, seventeen years later, my mom said "I never thought you could do it," and when I, shocked, said "what?" she said "well what with your ADHD and all," and I said "my what?" and she said "well, i never wanted to shake your confidence, and I thought once they put a label on you it'd be over, but you super have like, turbo ADHD. Why, what do you think your deal is?" She said it nicely and not in those words at all, but it was the first time I'd ever really realized that I wasn't just mildly eccentric, I did seem to actually have something wrong with me.
I've been trying to get a diagnosis ever since. I've never been able to. I had no health insurance at all for a huge chunk of my twenties, which put a damper on things. One doctor told me "you'd know if you had that" and when I was like "I... do" she was like "no i mean. you'd already be being treated." Which shows a wild and totally unwarranted optimism in our medical system, but she was a resident. The doctor overseeing her care of me suggested I try taking fish oil capsules. To "rebuild my brain tissue".
I did. It didn't help. I still buy them but mostly I use them now to get my cat to take pills.
Eventually in my 30s my doctors started sort of believing me maybe, or at least realizing they couldn't really brush me off (I have gotten... less easily-cowed as I've aged) but they were all like "oh, I can't evaluate that. You'll have to research and find a place that can do a neuropsych eval for you. Insurance doesn't cover those. So good luck. Have some antidepressants in the meantime."
I slid into my 40s, still undiagnosed. I read as many self-help books on the topic as I could find, did all the checklists I found. They all said "girl you super have like turbo ADHD." I tried meditation. I tried divination. I tried bullet journaling, which was hilarious. I tried yoga.
I actually damaged myself doing yoga and am banned from yoga, but at least I'm in physical therapy now. (Word to the wise: if you have really really flexible hip joints, don't fucking do yoga. "Usually I don't have to tell people not to get into that position," said my bemused physical therapist. "Oh," I said, blissfully bepretzeled. "It feels super good." "Mm," she said, "you've torn your labrum. Stop doing that." Now I do really, really boring stretches that don't feel nearly as good, but I also can walk without limping, so. Like. We take the good with the bad I guess.)
Anyway. My PCP in January was like "wait you didn't follow my super vague directions to go see 'the guys downstairs' and see if they can squeeze you into their eleven-month waiting period to get an evaluation that i cannot mention without saying it's several thousand dollars and your insurance surely won't cover it? you must not want this diagnosis very badly!" (At no point has anyone ever given me a phone number for 'the guys downstairs'. I still don't know what she meant by any of those directions. This PCP and I technically speak the same language but I've never understood a single thing she has told me and I don't think she understands a word I say in return, everything I tell her seems to be such a shock to her. You blame antidepressants for your weight gain? I've never heard of that. Ma'am please look up what the incredibly common side effects of antidepressants are.)
I called around but noplace both took my insurance and was accepting new patients. Finally I gave up. Then my Dude went on our insurance company's website and took over the search. He found that there's some kind of concierge service thing, which the insurance company normally charges $450/mo for but our plan includes it, because it's pretty well-hidden on the website and most people aren't ever going to find it anyway. So he said, you know what, I am going to instigate a query on this.
They took two weeks but eventually came back with a list of 13 places, most of them not remotely local. Ten of them were red X's, disqualified for varying reasons-- one because the phone number didn't work, another because it's a seven-hour drive away and doesn't do telehealth. One was in New Jersey. None of them were the local places I had already called.
Two of them were valid, but the insurance wouldn't cover the evaluation for various reasons.
One of them was fully covered, the insurance company said. So I went there.
Their website said "no you're not we can't see you". But Dude was like, call them on the phone. Surely, surely, the concierge service couldn't have lied??? Bet, I said, and called them and left a message, and said to him, if they call me back I will eat a hat.
But they did. They called me back. "Our insurance checker widget is down," they said. "But we do take your insurance! We can see you. We just don't know how much it will cost."
Ominous.
But. They could see me later in the week, via a telehealth appointment.
So I signed up.
The appointment was this morning. I turned up. Their insurance checker thingy still wasn't working so they couldn't be sure how much the appointment would cost me. I at this point don't care, and gave them my HSA credit card, and said do what you will.
I waited 45 minutes and then texted the number they'd texted me from with the confirmation, and a moment later the guy showed up. "Whoops," he said, "that system isn't working quite right either!"
He talked to me for like. Three minutes, and was like "yeah that sounds. Pretty textbook. I'm going to prescribe you stimulants." He then proceeded to take a very basic medical history, and I recognized all the questions because I have researched stimulant medication for ADHD so much. And he was like "We're going to start with Adderall, check at your pharmacy in like an hour." And then he gave me extremely useful and detailed instructions on how to take it, when to take it, what side effects to worry about, what to expect, what to note down in case it might mean a problem, and how to be safe about it. (He asked me three times if I'd ever been suicidal, and it had also been in the online pre-screening. I am aware that can be a rare but very serious side effect of stimulants!)
And then I went to Rite-Aid and I now have 16 pills in my possession, and i am going to wait until tomorrow morning to start taking them, and I am already scheduled for my follow-up in 15 days.
I have absolutely no idea how much any of that is going to cost, but for the record the pills were eleven dollars.
So. I don't know why the last decade of my life has been spent being told that a comprehensive and unattainably expensive neuropsychological evaluation was my only option. Maybe this place is a disreputable pill mill or whatever. But. I am going to get to try to medicate this disorder that has warped my entire life to this point, and I am going to try to see if I can't have some more control over my life, and if it doesn't work then at least I will know, instead of on my deathbed being like "i wonder if i'd ever tried amphetamines maybe I'd have been able to finish a project ever in my life, guess we'll never know".
Which was what I was starting to genuinely think was going to happen.
Literally though why can't a primary care doctor just refer you to a psychiatrist who can then decide whether you need an assessment or whether your condition is likely to respond well to a basic diagnosis?? I get needing the whole nine yards if you're not sure what's wrong with this kid and you don't want to give them the wrong thing-- like I know misdiagnosing a bipolar sufferer with depression can give you really bad outcomes, for example-- but-- I don't know? I don't know.
I just want to be able to start and finish projects. What I'd really love is to be able to make to-do lists meaningfully, as that is an ability I did used to have and now absolutely don't. I legit cannot make a to-do list in any meaningful or useful way.
So we'll see. I'm going to keep a journal and the real test of whether the pills work is to see whether I can actually keep the journal.
But I need to find some kind of edible hat, at some point, just to keep my word.
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superlinguo · 2 months
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Research Data Management. Or, How I made multiple backups and still almost lost my honours thesis.
This is a story I used to tell while teaching fieldworkers and other researchers about how to manage their data. It’s a moderately improbable story, but it happened to me and others have benefited from my misadventures. I haven't had reason to tell it much lately, and I thought it might be useful to put into writing. This is a story from before cloud storage was common - back when you could, and often would, run out of online email storage space. Content note: this story includes some unpleasant things that happened to me, including multiple stories of theft (cf. moderately improbable). Also, because it's stressful for most of the story, I want to reassure you that it does have a happy conclusion. It explains a lot of my enthusiasm for good research data management. In Australia, 'honours' is an optional fourth year for a three year degree. It's a chance to do some more advanced coursework and try your hand at research, with a small thesis project. Of course, it doesn't feel small when it's the first time you've done a project that takes a whole year and is five times bigger than anything you’ve ever written. I've written briefly about my honours story (here, and here in a longer post about my late honours supervisor Barb Kelly) . While I did finish my project, it all ended a bit weirdly when my supervisor Barb got ill and left during the analysis/writing crunch. The year after finishing honours I got an office job. I hoped to maybe do something more with my honours work, but I wasn't sure what, and figured I would wait until Barb was better. During that year, my sharehouse flat was broken into and the thief walked out with the laptop I'd used to do my honours project. The computer had all my university files on it, including my data and the Word version of my thesis. I lost interview video files, transcriptions, drafts, notes and everything except the PDF version I had uploaded to the University's online portal. Uploading was optional at the time, if I didn't do that I probably would have just been left with a single printed copy. I also lost all my jewellery and my brother’s base guitar, but I was most sad about the data (sorry bro). Thankfully, I made a backup of my data and files on a USB drive that I kept in my handbag. This was back when a 4GB thumb drive was an investment. That Friday, feeling sorry for myself after losing so many things I couldn't replace, I decided to go dancing to cheer myself up. While out with a group of friends, my bag was stolen. It was the first time I had a nice handbag, and I still miss it. Thankfully, I knew to make more than one back up. I had an older USB that I'd tucked down the back of the books on my shelf (a vintage 256MB drive my dad kindly got for me in undergrad after a very bad week when I lost an essay to a corrupted floppy disk). When I went to retrieve the files, the drive was (also) corrupted. This happens with hard drives sometimes. My three different copies in three different locations were now lost to me.
Thankfully, my computer had a CD/DVD burner. This was a very cool feature in the mid-tens, and I used to make a lot of mixed CDs for my friends. During my honours project I had burned backed up files on some discs and left them at my parents house. It was this third backup, kept off site, which became the only copy of my project. I very quickly made more copies. When Barb was back at work, and I rejoined her as a PhD student, it meant we could return to the data and all my notes. The thesis went through a complete rewrite and many years later was published as a journal article (Gawne & Kelly 2014). It would have probably never happened if I didn’t have those project files. I continued with the same cautious approach to my research data ever since, including sending home SD cards while on field trips, making use of online storage, and archiving data with institutional repositories while a project is ongoing.
I’m glad that I made enough copies that I learnt a good lesson from a terrible series of events. Hopefully this will prompt you, too, to think about how many copies you have, where they’re located, and what would happen if you lost access to your online storage.
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snakegorl212006 · 1 year
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Pomefiore Journal Entries
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-------------Rook hunt---------------------------------
-We’ve met truly in sam’s shop
-his stocking tendencies are certainly….concerning
-literally he doesn't need to be waiting outside my window 
-this makes me question how long he has been doing this
-the necklace barely tracks him which explains why nothing much happened when i was around
-didn’t even vibrate once 
-unless he’s 1 inch close to touching me
-other then he’s kinda weird, he is really gentleman like
-definitely can be very helpful when it comes to finding things or tracking down grim when he stole something of mine again
-he has this whole things around the pursuing of beauty which it’s cool 
-sometimes there’s a minor language barrier as he likes to switch to french every now and then 
-he likes to compliment people in french often
-based on experience with the others, asking about how he died might be a sensitive subject 
-rook and the others were popular in the 20’s and there deaths were compleat mysteries
-still haven’t yet to ask him
-----------Vil schoenheit-----------------------------
-I thought he’ll be meaner 
-not saying he’s not on the sassy side of things but he’s nice at the same time
-kinda like a nagging mom
-he likes to see if I’m doing well health wise
-if he see me not looking my best when i come in i automatically dragged by vil, epel(my savor) helping me escape the queen's wrath, or rooks huntting me down by vil’s orders 
-”just dress and look nicely, have good manners and posture and you should avoid his wrath”-epel
-well he gives me a reason to use those fancy outfits that i would wear only once 
-but that doesn't stop him for the need to dress me up in his old clothing
-”someone has to put them in good use”-vil 
-possessive and controlling in a understatement for this guy 
-he never likes when i bring people around and more vocal about it then the people in heartslabyul 
-always holds some sort of jealousy with other people of the living
-he has this aura which acts like a narcotic 
-apparently he can activate this toxic air at will 
-i did ask him why he knocked me out before but it turned into a scolding session on my sleep schedule and my overall health 
-Don’t mechonded his rival 
-AT
-ALL
-Neige leblanche is a actor and model who only risen to fame recently and “stole”(vil’s words not mine) the title of “the most beautiful person in the world”
-Rook likes Neige a lot and it pisses Vil a lot to a certain degree  
-he likes to talk about his past accomplishments and sometimes even the true reason why he performed in such ways or why he made that song
-definitely more meaningful than a documentary
-”they only have one part of the main story” he said 
-he sometimes call me sweet potato when he needs something or feeling affectionate
-definitely have to be cautious around
-he’s just as addicting as the poison drugs he makes  
-sweet and dotting as he is, he definitely has some red flags 
-----Epel Felmier------------------------------
-don’t call him cute. Period. Not even as a complement(he wanted me to write this down) -away from vil’s gaze he has a cute cool country accent -he often asked me to help him to tend to the gardens and his apple tree -love to talk about his family and his life before meeting Vil -He can’t stand Vil and 100% blames him for his death -i managed to piece together that some poison was involved by vil himself -i didn't ask any more then that -i understand his rightful anger tho -he teaches me how to handle vil’s poisonous aura by offering me a bottle of apple juice which had herbs that combat the smell -Vil taught him how to make it and instructed him to give me some -when he’s not busy doing whatever task vil needs him to do, he likes to explore the other properties along with me when i do my rounds -other times he likes to watch and play sports -one winter he taught me how to use a sled using whatever animal was around to help us.(it was fun)
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ruhua-langblr · 5 months
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Holiday Gifts for Language Learners~
Here are some ideas for language learning enthusiasts this holiday season!
(Some specific examples will be focused on Chinese/Korean as the target language. None of the links are affiliate links. amazon is linked to out of convenience, but there are usually other places that these things can be purchased at!)
Books!
There's a lot of textbooks out there that approach language learning from different perspectives. Textbooks can often be expensive, so checking out used book stores is a great idea! I really enjoy Modern Mandarin Chinese Grammar and this used copy in very good condition is so much cheaper than the original price! Also, TTMIK's latest books are currently on sale!
While on the subject of books, there are so many options for reading in foreign language! For lower level learners, graded readers are a great choice as you can find books at your current level that can grow with you! For example Tales and Traditions has four volumes of short stories and myths in Chinese, with each volume increasing in difficulty. Abridged Classics like this series from Sinolingua Press or this Journey to the West series.
For advanced learners, buying novels in your target language is also a great choice! Soo and Carrots has collected Korean novels recommended by members of BTS.
2. iTalki!
I've been using iTalki for the past couple months and I've really enjoyed it! It's great to learn from a native speaker now that I'm out of a classroom environment, but still actively pursuing a higher degree of Chinese as well as starting Korean. They have a lot of deals on packages and prices vary between teachers, so it's easy to find something in your budget! I do have a code for $5 (AC6AGf0) for new users.
3. Notetaking!
For traditional notetaking, I think these translucent sticky notes are great for taking notes that aren't a hassle to erase, while still showing the text that you're commenting on! I also love to put relevant stickers on my notebooks. Lots of fun options like 我不知道,加油 salamander, 자고 싶어, many Korean words of encouragement,and the Ted Cruz meme 这个人吃了我的儿子。
Digital notetakers might enjoy this goodnotes journal! It's highly customizable to whatever language you might be learning. I have two versions of it in my goodnotes, and each uses different pages for Korean and Chinese. Goodnotes itself is also a great gift if you want to upgrade from free or a yearly subscription to total ownership!
4. Language Learning Apps/Sites!
I try to work within the free world as much as possible, but there are some things worth paying for! Reading apps for Chinese like Du Chinese, or my favorite, Readibu are super helpful! Readibu is free, but the paid option has a lot of great features!
Also for those missing TTMIK after they added a paywall to a lot of content, a membership to their courses would be great!
5. Movies and TV!
Besides the benefit of immersion, learning a language is also about learning another culture. Right now the Criterion Collection is 50% off at B&N until December 4th!
For TV, getting a subscription to a site like Viki or iQiYi is a great gift as they have new shows from many asian countries!
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schraubd · 1 year
Text
The Intolerance of Being Unhappy When Extremists Succeed
There's an emergent line I'm seeing from the nationalist-conservative right, complaining about how, as their practical power increases, they and their ideas are no longer looked upon with the same degree of affability as when they were fringe activists chirping at the margins. Adam Mortara put it as follows after he and Jonathan Mitchell, architect of Texas' SB8 and some of the most radical anti-abortion pushes in the country, received an (allegedly) chilly reception by a liberal former mentor.*
“It was hurtful . . . and eye-opening,” Mortara said. “You’re fine when you’re just a yappy little dog that can’t bite. But, if you grow up to be a big dog that can actually do stuff, then you’re probably going to be put down.”
Justice Alito said something similar in his whine-terview in the Wall Street Journal last week -- he alleged that he's really no different than Antonin Scalia, but Scalia was tolerated by liberal elites because he was mostly in dissent. Now that Justice Alito commands a majority, things hit different.
"When you're in dissent," Justice Alito observes, "well, his ideas were amusing and interesting. He spoke at a lot of law schools and he was honored at law schools, but he wasn't a threat, because those views were not prevailing on issues that really hit home."
This line is presented as some sort of gotcha to the liberals. "Oh, you tolerated us when our ideas were basically just fascinating thought experiments, but now that we're winning it's dangerous." To which I say: yes! That's how it works! 
The whole point of liberal free speech commitments is that there is a sizeable gap between "views one is willing to consider and debate" and "views which it would be good, or even acceptable, to prevail in political life." We don't limit our consideration only to those positions which we're willing to endorse on-the-merits; which means that there is no conflict between engaging in such consideration in the abstract and being appalled when certain views actually start winning the day in "real" politics. The "gotcha" completely misunderstands the point of what liberal tolerance in the context of an abstract intellectual discussion is supposed to signify, or commit to.
For example, it is entirely plausible that one might assign, in a political theory class, works by Lenin, and consider/debate them in the classroom context. That's perfectly appropriate. But if the Leninists actually start seizing political power and instituting the purges, that would be bad! And if they said, "Oh, it was fine to debate our ideas in the classroom, but now that we're actually in charge and establishing gulags you have a problem with it," well, yeah, I do! Clearly! And I can think the same thing of compulsory pregnancy and forced childbirth. As a professor, it is important to debate these questions. But the actual political reality of it is catastrophic, and it's fine to say so.
It is not a failure of liberal tolerance to be unhappy when illiberal authoritarianism is on the march. A willingness to debate and consider these views as abstract intellectual exercises does not make said unhappiness hypocrisy. This isn't that complicated.
* Full disclosure: the mentor in question was David Strauss, who was my mentor in law school as well. I also got to know Mitchell when I was a law student, and can attest that he is a personally very pleasant person to interact with in addition to possessing a formidable intellect. Any one who knows Professor Strauss is well aware of his commitment to nurturing and supporting law students from a range of different ideological backgrounds, and so I have no doubt he is genuine in feeling hurt that Mitchell has used his prodigious legal talents in service of dangerous, even lawless, public initiatives.
via The Debate Link https://ift.tt/OWq6ye8
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thislovintime · 10 months
Photo
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Photos by Henry Diltz, Richard E. Aaron, © LIFE/Shutterstock, and Nurit Wilde. (Photos 4 & 5 are from the “Heart and Soul” video shoot.)
For Father’s Day. Thoughts go out to Peter’s kids.
“I was never inherently afraid of my situation. When I found myself in a boardinghouse with my daughter in a room for twenty-five dollars a month, sleeping on a mat on the floor, I was not discouraged. I had already made my connection with my source.” - Peter Tork, When The Music Mattered (1984)
“[Hallie and Ivan] go to an alternative school locally. We [Peter and Barbara Iannoli] decided on it because it’s a place where if the kids wanted to do something they can insist on it. My kids have whale watching classes where they rent a boat and go and watch whales. I have never seen it, but they tell me it is a transcendental experience.” - Peter Tork, Evening Standard, July 26, 1983
Rosie O’Donnell: “You think you’re a good dad or do you…?” Peter: “No, actually, I’m not a very good, no, not as a good as I want to be. But then, I don’t know any dad who is, so...” Rosie: “That’s true, that’s true. I’m sure you do very well.” - VH1, late 1988
“Tork’s children don’t think of his celebrity one way or another, he said, although they wish their father had a more private life. ‘They take the bitter with the sweet,’ he said adding that he’s just Dad ‘in large measures.’ His 26-year-old daughter is pursuing a teaching degree. His 20-year-old son is a drummer in a reggae band
. ‘I am so impressed with him that way,’ Tork said, pride evident. ‘I wish he’d put his back to it more; he’d get more out of it, but you can’t tell someone something like that. They learn from what you do, not what you say.’” - Intelligencer Journal, July 19, 1996
Peter Tork: “David [Crosby] let me stay there for most of a year. It was sort of by way of interest on the loan I gave him to buy his boat, and I stayed there with my, with my then-girlfriend, and our daughter was born in that house.” Q: “In the house?” PT: “In the house, yeah, live, at-home birth —” Q: “On purpose or you just…?” PT: “That’s right, at-home birth, yeah, that was what we wanted.” Q: “(to Peter) [The second radio host is] expecting a baby. His wife.” PT: “Yeah? Cool! Oh, man. Oh, yeah? Excited, aren’t you? His eyes just brightened up, it’s great.” - GOLD 104.5, 1999
Q: “You have good relationships with your kids?” 
Peter Tork: “Yes, I do.” Q: “Oh, cool.” PT: “Very good. [...] [O]f my two daughters, the adult daughter says that she has a better relationship with me than any of her friends have with their fathers. It’s a good thing for us, and I hope that the others aren’t catastrophic. Because otherwise, it means (laughs), otherwise it’s small praise. But, you know, yeah, we’re doing fine, it’s wonderful.” - WDBB, February 2006
“[After his first cancer surgery, says Peter] ‘I couldn’t chew anything for a month. I was drinking my dinner — lots of milkshakes.’ It also took time for Peter to fully get back the power of speech. ‘For months, I was speaking with a lisp,’ he says. ‘It was a matter of me learning how to get my tongue under control again. I did my vocal exercises and the doctors decided I didn’t need speech therapy. It was a tough time but my daughter, Hallie, was a real support to me.’” - Daily Mail, August 16, 2011
From about the 8:36 min. mark, Peter speaks about Hallie and Ivan (who was in the audience) in this portion of The Monkees on People Are Talking in 1989; also featuring a tour anecdote about Ivan from Davy.
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aita-blorbos · 6 months
Note
AITA for making my close friends forget everything they had experienced over the past 100 years?
(ooc: this is major spoilers for this media also. Just a warning)
Me (??? f) and 6 other people including a pair of twins, two older men, and two guys around my age, were forced on a century-long journey to try and stop a world / universe-destroying force. We traveled across worlds, trying to collect something called 'the light of creation' that enhanced this force to an incredibly deadly degree and live in these worlds for a year before the world would either be consumed if we were to fail to collect this light or would hopefully survive this force as we were to move onto the next world. The reason we were able to do this so many times was because every time we'd escape from a world, our bodies would be reset back to where the journey originally began. So dying wasn't an issue as long as one person escaped from our ship. After some time we learned more and more about this force and were able to come up with a plan to give us much more time than a year to stop this force, a plan I disagreed with. However, when originally I brought up my own idea, it was overruled and shut down. So, we ended up breaking up the light into artifacts, powerful weapons that we scattered in a world very similar to our own which would give us many years and, what we hoped, would throw the force off our trail for good. Though these artifacts in this new world started wars where thousands of people had died and it didn't take long for me, and I'm sure the rest of my crew, to realize what we had done was wrong. Though there wasn't much for us to do, so I decided to take matters in my own hands. Now what had happened, I didn't mean for it to be as severe as it was nor go on for as long as it did. On our travels, we collected this strange creature that when fed media, songs, writing, etc. it could make everyone in the entire universe forget it / remember it in an instant and when drinking the water that it lives in you'll remember everything that you had one forgotten. So I did just this. As the journal keeper of our travels, I had every single thing that we went through written down, every journey, every word, I wrote it all down and fed it to this creature. However, some of the stuff that a few of my members had forgotten was regrettable. One of them was so involved with this mission of ours, that the only thing left to him was his name. Another, one of the twins, his sister went missing not long before I had put this plan into action and so I had to make him forget her completely. I couldn't have him go looking for her and get into trouble with the artifacts. I put the remaining people in places where they would be safe, and happy, and they were for a decade of time and during that time I tried to collect these artifacts myself, and one of them, my own, was easy to obtain but when I tried to get the others... well it didn't end well. I lost 30 years of my life to a torture game. I realized I couldn't do this alone. I set up a workforce, of people to come together to help me. See this creature had a kid, so if I fed the information again to the creature's kid but left out the parts about the artifacts then I could allow people to know about them without knowing about the century-long journey. This meant I could also get the people who remained of the 6 I could have access to besides the one I kept beside me, one of the twins, a human about my own age, and one of the older members of our crew. They helped me collect all the relics, becoming wonderful young men and creating bonds but recently shit went down. The force arrived and I put my plan into action and tried to put up the barrier but the rest of my crew all found the baby of the creature and now remembers everything. Reasonably, they're all angry, but I did it to protect them. I didn't want them to get hurt, and what we were doing to this world was wrong. AITA?
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fiveisnumber1 · 1 year
Text
Timeless - Five Hargreeves X Reader
Main story parts:
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34
A/N: Here is the next chapter! I'd like to thank everyone for their patience, it takes me a while to put these out but I hope that the extra care I put into the writing justifies the time period between uploads. I also just wanted to say that I am really proud of this chapter solely for the fact that I was able to utilize my journalism degree for about 400 words of content. You'll see it when it happens. The rest of the chapter is good too though, but I'm very proud of that one portion. Hope y'all enjoy it, thanks!
Warnings: Very long chapter, mentions of car crash, mentions of blood
__________________
Part 35 - The Roadtrip
In the halls of the fifth-floor corridor, you passed room after room as you tried to make your way toward your own. You remembered how this place used to be bustling. How it was filled to the brim with all different types of characters, each of which had a story that would never be told. Even if the walls of this place could talk you knew they wouldn't say anything because they've seen way too many things. What was once a hallway flooded with voices from behind closed doors was now just a green hallway haunted by its past and replaced with the sound of the buzzing lights above. This place had fallen far from its former glory if it even had any of that, to begin with. If it wasn't for your boyfriend and the rest of the Hargreeves being here you may have started to consider going back to the academy. At least you were used to its antiqueness, minus the upgrades the Sparrows had made.
It didn't matter, you were already here. As you had done many times before you glanced about the hall before walking through the door. Turning on your heel, your hand went up to the lock ready to open the door, but as you were about to switch it you realized there was no one on the other side to open it for. Muscle memory from repeated times of opening the door for Charlie had taken over. Your hand hovered over the lock for a second as you stared at it. There was part of you that wanted to open the door, the part of you that kept holding out hope for a familiar face from your past. And yet, there was the part that knew nothing was waiting for you on the other side. Letting out a small sigh you dropped your hands as you tried to avoid the inevitable disappointment that would come from opening the door.
Rolling your shoulders backward you let the issue drop as you continued to try and stay positive in this new time. You were back in 2019! Sure things were different, again...but you were in the future where you belonged! You had a place to stay! It wasn't really your home, but at least it was still your own. And you had all the Hargreeves, well...minus your Ben...but six out of seven was better than none! You could make this work. No. You would make this work. You always made things work. It was okay. You were...okay.
Finally turning from the door you began to wander around looking at your room. Unsurprisingly, nothing had changed. The same shitty green wallpaper and outdated furniture were still there. The musty smell of outdated wood and old carpet still lingered in the air. The stash of you and Charlie's now-expired snacks and old knick-knacks still filled the desk drawers. Nothing about this place had changed. Except you. The only surprising thing was that there wasn't almost 60 years' worth of dust covering the place. At least they had kept the room clean while you were gone.
Placing your bag on the ground, you plopped onto the bed before reaching into your bag and grabbing the package you had received from Charlie. You looked over the box to see if there was any indication of what was inside to warrant him writing open privately on the outside but there was none to be found. Shrugging your shoulders you pulled out one of your knives and gently cut the tape sealing the box. Opening up the flaps you pulled out a leather-bound book and held it in your hands. You weren't exactly sure what it was all about yet but he still decided to send you something. But while appreciated the gesture, you wondered why he wouldn't feel the need to give it to you in person and decided to ship it to the hotel instead. It's not like you wouldn't go and track him down once you settled back in. You didn't dwell on it though, it wasn't that big of a deal. You were just happy that you actually came to the hotel and were able to receive it. Opening the book, you saw as an envelope slid out and fell to the floor. Placing the book down you reached for the envelope, pulling it back up towards you as you read the words on the front,
My dearest daughter
The words caught your eye as you immediately knew who the letter was from. Quickly turning the envelope around you opened the seal and pulled out the paper within it. Gently, you opened up the old paper so as not to damage it as you read over the words on the page.
Hi sweetie,
Charlie has come to visit me in the hospital, as my old age is starting to truly take hold. Don't worry I'm not in any pain, I'm actually doing quite well besides the prolonged fatigue. Charlie and I had a long talk about you, reminiscing on the good times we shared with you. He says he knows you're still out there and I truly believe him when he says that which is why I am writing this.
The realization of what this letter was instantly hit you like a ton of bricks. You could feel a weight fall onto your shoulders as your hands began to shake. Tears pricked at your eyes threatening to fall and part of you wanted to stop reading now, to put the letter away and pretend that it wasn't real. That the message you knew would come after this didn't exist and you could live in ignorant bliss. But it wasn't right. She wrote this letter for you. She wrote the letter in the hope you would one day read it and to put it away wouldn't be what she wanted, so you cautiously continued to read.
I don't know where you are or if this letter will ever get to you, but as I near my final days I know I would regret it if I didn't even try to get you one last message. Ever since you left, I have never stopped thinking about you. Those few years that you were in my life were the best of my life. You brought so much joy and light to my world and although I was not your mother at birth you were and forever will be my daughter. After your disappearance, I never stopped looking for you and I never gave up hope that you were alive. I still believe that you are out there somewhere and if you are I just hope that you are safe and most importantly happy. All I could ever ask for is for you to be those two things, safe and happy, because what else could a mother want for her child than that? It's difficult knowing I won't be able to see your face before I eventually pass, but I'll look at the photos I have of us from our time together and imagine you are with me. I have always kept you close to my heart and I will always know I have you with me there.
I miss you immensely and I'll love you eternally. And in the classic words of Vera Lynn I know that:
We'll meet again, Don't know where, don't know when, But I know we'll meet again some sunny day. Keep smiling through, Just like you always do, 'Til the blue skies drive the dark clouds far away.
With all my heart and soul, love,
Your mother, Grace
You shut your eyes tightly, holding back the tears that so badly wanted to fall from your eyes. You knew this would happen. You had to have known that by the time you returned she would be gone. It was stupid to think she might still be here. You weren't stupid. No, no. You were smart. You definitely anticipated this. You were fine. It was just a bump in the road to starting over. Just like the other times, you had to put the past behind you and keep moving forward. As long as you moved forward you would be okay. Folding the letter back up you placed it in the envelope once more putting it off to the side. Turning back to the book Charlie had sent, you picked it up and opened the front cover. There on the inside of the cover was the familiar handwriting of Charles Anderson, your friend. Trying your best to perk up you read what he had written,
(Y/N),
Since you're going to be gone a while I thought I would take a page out of your book (no pun intended) and write entries in a journal of my own about the things I'm going to do, or well by the time you read this, the things I've done, over the years. I hope that I can fill this thing up with stories and memories that can make you proud! I bet it'll be interesting to be on the receiving end of the journal process this time around. Can't wait to give this to you, I really hope you'll like it.
~ Charlie
A small smile came back to your face as you read the note over again. You could hear his voice and his enthusiasm coming through the words on the page. For a moment it was like he was there with you, sitting in his favorite chair, munching on chips from the snack stash as he explained his plans. But as you looked below that note you saw one more. Your head tilted slightly to the side curious as the handwriting for this one was different. It was less consistent in style and much shakier. You had to squint a bit this time to make out the words but you began to read,
(Y/N),
I can only hope that you were able to find this. I sent this book to the Hotel Obsidian because I did not trust sending it to the academy. I don't want to make this addition, especially with the letter that's included in this package from Grace, but it has to be done. I tried to hold out til you came back. I wanted to be here to give this to you, but time has caught up to me and I'm no longer as young as I once was. My time is coming, but I want you still to have this journal as a reminder of our friendship because just like with everyone else you've brought into your life, our bond spans time and space. I don't think there is any other person in this world who can form connections with so many people like that, than you. I know that things will be difficult when you come back, but I also know your strength and resilience. You have overcome so much and I know you can do it again but remember you do not need to face the world on your own. I cannot tell you how to feel with this knowledge, but I hope this note and the rest of the journal can bring you joy at the full life I have lived rather than the fact that my story is coming to an end. You changed my life and I hope you can see that through my words and experiences. Thank you for being my friend, you're still the best one I could've asked for.
~ Charlie
Your heart sank. Sank to the far depths of your being as you finished Charlie's follow-up note and felt the reality of the situation settled in. The only two people who mattered to you in the 60s were gone.
Grace and Charlie were dead.
Slowly, you closed the book back up before placing it off to the side with the letter from Grace. The tears you had done so well to hold back started to run down your face but you didn't cry out. Instead, you laid back on your bed, staring at the ceiling as the quiet tears continued to fall. It felt like a piece of you was ripped out, and yet, it was a familiar feeling, one you knew well. You had felt it with every reset. Every friend, every guardian, every loved one you lost there was that sinking feeling that came with it. It was like demons clawing at your ankles trying to drag you down into a dark abyss. You couldn't let them though, you couldn't go into the abyss. But at the same time, you couldn't do anything else. And so you just laid there with your silent sorrow as you tried to figure out what to do now.
Similarly, Five also was laying in his bed trying to figure out what to do with himself. After he finished getting off the thought of how you looked in your outfit, he stared at the frame of the bunk above him. It took him a few tries to fully work through his feelings but now he just laid with the thoughts of how hard things had become. While he would never want to be stranded in the apocalypse again, he could admit dealing with these kinds of things was a lot easier when there was no one around. His siblings weren't there to bother him and the only version he had of you was the one he created in his head to grow up with him, rather than the real, tangible, physical version he had now. Whenever he needed to fix himself, he was able to with no other thought necessary, but now in a world surrounded by people, and with nothing else to focus on but you, the rampaging hormones that existed in this young adult body of his were going to keep his mind racing. What would you think if you knew this is what he left to do? Would you be okay with it or would you find him disgusting for thinking of you in such a way? He didn't want to do anything that you might perceive as wrong but at the same time, he couldn't help the way you made him feel. If only there was an instruction manual on how to go about these things because it's not like he could ask his brothers for advice. Luther was a monkey space virgin, Klaus was already mocking him, and Diego would treat him like target practice if he even insinuated these types of feelings for you. Using one of his arms to cover his eyes, Five let out a frustrated sigh guessing this was just one of those learn-by-doing types of things. Five didn't know how much time had passed, but soon enough he could hear voices from outside the bedroom door. Not wanting to deal with what was most likely his brothers, Five rolled to face the wall and pretended to be asleep. He could hear the door open and close and the sounds of footsteps walking through the room. As the footsteps approached he could hear one person stop and then Luther's voice comment,
"Aw man Klaus, there's a lot of napkins in the trash can."
Intrigued, Klaus walked over to where Luther was standing. It was a little ridiculous that Luther still believed that he had made Five cry, but it was funnier to not tell him otherwise. Looking at the filled can on the ground, a smirk came to Klaus' face as he looked over towards Five on the bed. He couldn't tell if Five was actually asleep or not but either way he playfully remarked,
"Oh yeah, he really worked those feelings out, huh?"
Five rolled his eyes annoyed at Klaus' immaturity and if he wasn't pretending to be asleep he would've told Klaus to shut up and leave him alone. He could only hope that the two of them would go to bed soon.
"I still can't believe you for what you did. He's our brother." Luther scolded
"It was funny," Klaus replied with a bit of a laugh
The sound of the door opening and closing occurred once more and Diego's voice could be heard calling across the room,
"What was funny?"
"Klaus made Five cry because he got the color of (Y/N)'s shirt wrong," Luther explained
Five's face contorted into confusion as he continued to lie facing the wall. He knew for a fact that he had not been crying because he got the color of your shirt wrong. In fact, the feelings he had dealt with were on the far opposite side of the emotional spectrum. But lying and saying he cried over the color of your shirt was definitely a lot easier explanation than the truth. Sometimes the stupidity of his brothers could come in handy. Continuing to eavesdrop on the conversation Five could hear Diego ask confused,
"The bastard knows how to cry?"
"Asshole." Five said quietly under his breath
"In a sense..." Klaus commented
"Can't you two be nice?" Luther ridiculed "He's just a little guy in love with his girlfriend."
"Yeah well as her older brother that's a problem to me," Diego remarked annoyed
Of course, it was. Everything he did with you was a problem to Diego. At least Luther seemed to be on his side, albeit a little confused about things, but still supportive.
"If that's what you consider a problem then you have bigger issues on the horizon," Klaus mumbled
"What?" Diego asked
"Nothing." Klaus brushed away before patting Luther on the back and reassuring "Anyway, listen big guy, I'm sure he's doing much better now that he's gotten all of that feeling out of his system."
"You think so?" Luther questioned
"Of course!" Klaus replied cheerily as he walked over to the mini bar and picked up a bottle "Now would anyone like a good nightcap before bed?"
"Put the bottle down Klaus, we need to rest up so we can kick those stupid Sparrow's asses and get our lives back."
"Ugh fine, whatever." Klaus said taking a swig of the bottle before stripping off most of his clothes and climbing into the top bunk "But if you wake me up early from my beauty sleep tomorrow morning I'm going to be real upset."
Diego rolled his eyes as he changed into just a tank top and his boxers and settled in on the couch. Crossing his arms over his chest he closed his eyes and prepared to sleep but then from behind him Luther could be heard asking,
"Hey, do you guys think we can trade some ghost stories before bed like they do in those camp movies?"
"No." Klaus and Diego simultaneously replied
"Ok..." Luther said quietly followed by the loud squeaking of him rolling over in his cot
Pulling out a knife, Diego threw it at the light switch across the room causing it to flip off and making the room go dark. And with that, everything fell silent except for the sounds of Diego beginning to snore. Five rolled onto his back trying not to make the frame of the bunks squeak and looked at bottom of the bunk above him. Silently he stayed there not moving, but then a nauseating smell crept through the room as Luther let out a barrage of sleep farts. Gagging from the scent, Five decided to take up your offer to stay with you as there was no way he was going to deal with this for the whole night. Carefully, Five got up from his bed and quietly made his way across the room before blinking out the door and heading to your room on the fifth floor.
You didn't know how much time had passed as you laid on your bed but you knew you couldn't lay there forever. You could already feel the way your body had begun to settle into the mattress and you refused to be consumed by it all. Taking a deep breath, you exhaled, before forcing yourself to sit up. Your face was still wet from your tears but you couldn't let these things get you down. Neither Grace nor Charlie wanted that, they said so in their messages to you. They wanted you to be happy and so you had to try.
Wiping your eyes you decided to get out of your day clothes and put on the pajama tank top and shorts that Sloane had lent you. Sitting back down on the bed you looked at the journal that Charlie gifted you, and decided you would do what he would've wanted and read it. Grabbing the book, you placed it in your lap, opened it, and began to read. One by one, you flipped through the entries, combing over the details of Charlie's life after you had gone. His enthusiasm jumped off the page as he mentioned his father being dead and his ability to focus on his art. You could hear the words in his voice as you read, almost like he was there with you pacing back and forth in your room as he talked, the way he had done so many times before. And for a moment a small smile came to your face as you imagined him happily putting down these words on the page so he could share them with you one day. As you continued to read, the years went on throughout the pages, and you started to feel as if you were there with him during the events he recounted. You were there for the opening of his art business, you sat in a booth across the diner watching his first date unfold, and you stood by his side on his wedding day watching him get married to the woman he loved. He was happy and for that, you were happy too.
But then something changed on the entry for October 9th, 1989. The writing was messy as if it had been written in a panicked rush and the first line of the letter did nothing to ease your concern.
(Y/N),
Something is wrong. Something is very, very wrong-
Your heart raced slightly, you could hear the pounding in your ears but as you were about to read on a knock came from the door. Snapping your head up, you looked over towards the door quietly, staring at it to see if you were hearing things or not.
You weren't hearing things though, as on the other side of your door was your boyfriend trying to figure out how to present himself. As he awkwardly stood in the empty hallway he tried a few poses deciding on how he wanted to stand for when you opened the door.
"Maybe I should cross my arms? No. Um...I could...lean against the door frame? Yeah, yeah. I'll lean. That's normal. That'll look good for her." Five spoke to himself
Five fixed his hair and flattened out his robe as best as he could before putting his arm up and leaning against the outer edge of the doorframe. Knocking once more, he quietly waited for you to show up while he stayed frozen in his pose.
Hearing another knock you closed the book, placing it on the nightstand next to you before getting up and walking over to the door. Opening the door you found Five standing there on the other side.
"Oh hi," You greeted, feeling relieved that it was just him
"Hey," Five responded leaning more into the door
A playful smirk came to your face as you took note of his intense lean. Not only was it funny that he was trying to play the cool guy, but it reminded you a bit of how he was when you two were younger. He was always so hyper-focused on trying to impress you since he was never sure how things worked outside the academy, and just like now, it was quite adorable to see him try.
"Impressive lean." You commented
"You like it?" Five replied, the excitement evident in his eyes
"Very much so," You said amused "Now, are you gonna come in or did you come here just to lean?"
With a smile on his face, Five stepped inside the room and took a look around. The room was smaller than the one he and his brothers had gotten, but it was much nicer than theirs. Your furniture was well-kept, matching, and didn't seem like a collection of random items thrown into a room. You had a large window with a great view of the city, which was quite the step up from the back alley window that Klaus pissed out of. And you had a king-sized bed that looked way more comfortable than the shitty bunk bed he had.
"Nice place, much better than mine." Five remarked
"I'm not surprised, most of the rooms in this place are awful," You replied
"Yeah. Even the shitty motels I had to stay in during my commission days were better than having to share with my brothers." Five complained
You could see the annoyance on his face and honestly, you couldn't blame him for being annoyed. The Hotel Obsidian was as outdated as old hotels that only had the bare minimum of upkeep came. The hotel was already outdated when you and Charlie would stay here, but it was even more so now, and you could only imagine the step down from the room Five got was to yours. Hell, the only reason your room probably stayed so nice was that you were somewhat important to Reginald whether you liked it or not. Which you did not, but you weren't going to let the niceness of your room go to waste.
"You know, if you hate your room that much you could just stay here. With me." You suggested
"You wouldn't mind me staying in your room?" Five questioned
Walking over towards him you took his hand in your own and held it. A smile on your face as you softly answered,
"Honestly, I'd prefer it if you stayed in our room."
A smile crept onto Five's face as he heard what you had said. Our room. The words repeated over and over in his mind, not because he needed to process them, but because he liked the thought. Hearing those words felt like a milestone to him. It was a confirmation that you two were taking a step in the right direction, a step towards building a life together. Sure, he didn't expect your first place to be a hotel room but so long as he was with you he would take whatever was available. Five held your hand a little tighter as he replied gently,
"Okay, I'll stay."
Lifting your hand towards his lips, he placed a kiss on the back of yit. You smiled wider at the action as his love meant everything to you. Just having him around made your world that little bit brighter. As he looked back up at you, the two of you locked eyes and stood together quietly, holding each other's hand. But then, a thought popped into your mind and you couldn't help but ask,
"Oh! Did you manage to check on your thing? Whatever it was?"
Five's eyes shot wide for a moment as he remembered the vague and rushed way in which he had dismissed your earlier offer to come here. What was he supposed to do? How should he answer this question? He couldn't just outright admit that he had gone to jack off because you looked hot. Could he? No. He shouldn't. You two weren't there in terms of that discussion yet. Were you? No. Well maybe...you seemed pretty into the moment back in the bathroom on the farm. That was one instance though. That's not enough to warrant bringing it up. No, definitely not.
"Five?" You called trying to get a response from your boyfriend
"Oh." Five said snapping from his thoughts before stating "Yeah. I did."
That was a good enough response. He did check on the thing he needed to check on. As long as you didn't press any further he would be fine.
"What was it?" You asked
Shit.
He needed to say something. Anything.
"Pajamas." Five responded without even thinking
"Pajamas?" You questioned confused
"Yeah. Pajamas." Five lied giving fake elaboration to his response "I was looking to see if the hotel supplied some since all my clothes are in the wash and I couldn't find any."
You nodded your head at his explanation. it was understandable that he wanted something else to wear given how much hell that academy uniform had been through. And on top of that why would he want to keep wearing the clothes of the place that ruined his life? It sucked that there were no pajamas available and all his clothes were in the wash. Wait. If all of his clothes were in the wash...
"Have you been wearing nothing under your robe this whole time?" You blurted out
"No, no! I have boxers on!" Five panicked "I just wanted more clothing."
The room went quiet as the two of you stood there silently once more. But unlike the peaceful quiet of only a few moments ago, this silence was quite loud. Both of you looked away from the other as you each internally cursed yourself for being so stupid. This wasn't an issue earlier today, but perhaps it was because earlier was still a stolen moment between the chaos of the commission and returning home while this was just a regular moment in which nothing else was going on. Something neither of you had really gotten at this point and was now causing you to face the totality of your emotional range. Either way, at this point, Five was starting to believe telling you the truth and taking whatever heat he might've got from it would've been easier, while you were trying to keep your mind from wandering to its more explicit places given the knowledge you had now. Trying to remedy the situation you quickly turned away from Five and stated,
"I might have something you can wear."
Crouching by the open duffle bag on your floor, you dug through the clothes that Charlie had shoved into the bag. As expected most of the stuff was your typical day clothes but you knew you had a few things that would work for Five. As you shuffled through all your stuff a bit more you found one thing for Five to wear.
"Here take these gray sweatpants," You said throwing them behind you for Five to catch
Catching the sweatpants, Five immediately slipped them on under his robe. While they may have been oversized on you, they fit him relatively well. Knowing that the next thing you would give him was probably going to be a shirt Five undid the belt on his robe before slipping the robe off and hanging it over a nearby chair.
It only took you a few seconds more to find a shirt that he could wear to bed. Pulling it out of the bag you stood up, and as you began to turn around you spoke,
"Also, I have thi-"
Your sentence immediately dropped off as you saw your boyfriend shirtless in the gray sweatpants you gave him. The only other item on his person was his locket draped around his neck. Your body stood frozen but every other part of you began working overtime. Your heart started to race, butterflies fluttered rapidly around your stomach, and your brain began to fill with more thoughts of the uncensored kind. You knew you were attracted to your boyfriend, he was always very handsome, but seeing him like this out of that stupid uniform? Fuck he was hot. You weren't even sure where to look, but the devious little voice in the back of your head was wondering if the hype around sweatpants season was real or not.
"(Y/N)?" Five called concerned about why you had frozen
Five looked over you searching for answers as to why you froze but as he did so he started putting the pieces together. He saw the flush on your cheeks, the way you were biting your bottom lip, how your eyes would look him over briefly before looking away, and the not-so-subtle glance you took at the sweatpants he was wearing. His concern quickly faded away as a smirk rose to his face. Maybe your mind and his mind were in more similar places than he thought. He still didn't know how to approach the topic but it was reassuring that you might feel the same way he does.
"Hey, babe?" He called
Your eyes blinked a few times as you finally focused and recomposed yourself. With your brain functioning once more you averted your gaze as you managed to buffer out a response, stuttering,
"I- um- sorry. I just lost my train of thought for a second..."
It was interesting seeing you so flustered. Typically, you had been the one to initiate previous bouts of flirting but Five was starting to like being on the other side of it. Taking a step to stand right in front of you, he used his hand to tilt your face back and up toward his. His eyes locked on yours as his thumb brushed gently across your bottom lip.
"What was on your mind?" He asked in a low, steady voice
A chill ran up your spine as you stood there wordlessly. This man was going to be the death of you. You didn't know how to respond. Could you even respond? What could you say? These things were so much easier when it was in the heat of the moment or there was some external pressure on the two of you. And in those cases, you had been the one to take the initiative, but right now was just A moment and you were not the one running the show. It was times like these that you now wished you didn't tune out Addison and Kenny when they were going into detail about the intricacies of their relationships and hookups. You could feel your face heat up more as you responded vaguely,
"Just...sleep..."
You then pushed the shirt you were holding into his chest as you quickly added,
"Put this on. It's time for bed."
"Anything for you babe." Five replied
Five took the shirt from you and watched as you quickly went over to the bed, getting under the covers and burying your face in a pillow most likely to hide the tomato-red blush on your face. Putting the shirt on he decided he had teased you enough for one night although he was more than happy to keep this interaction in mind for future reference. Turning off the light in the room, Five went over and climbed into bed next to you. His arms gently wrapped around your waist and pulled you close to him as he pressed a soft kiss to the back of your shoulder.
Feeling less flustered and wanting to cuddle rather than just spoon, you rolled over to face him. Wrapping your arms back around his waist, you nuzzled your face into his chest, but as you did so you could feel your forehead press against the locket underneath his shirt. You knew how much he loved the locket you gave him all those years ago but it was still nice that he wore it this long.
"I'm glad you still wear this." You said softly
"Of course, it's my most prized possession. I rarely ever take it off." Five stated
"When do you take it off?" You asked curiously
"Mainly to clean it. I tried my best to keep the ash and dirt of the apocalypse from building up on it. I wanted it to stay as nice as it could." Five answered "That's why I always keep it under my shirt. To protect it better."
Five thought about all those years and the way that he would always set aside time to polish off the locket as best as he could. How he used the nicest fibers he could find to make sure it was still able to shine even in the conditions he endured. It was one of the only things he had left of you for a while and keeping it clean sometimes felt like the only good thing he could do for you at the time. The upkeep of it meant quite a lot to him.
"I remember the first time I was able to truly get it cleaned. The commission had finally given me a hit in modern times and after settling in I went right to a nearby jeweler. I spent all my money for that job on getting it professionally cleaned." Five reminisced
"You still had money to eat though right?" You questioned
"No. As I said, I spent all of it. But I had starved plenty of times in the apocalypse and nothing compared to the feeling of seeing your gift get restored to its former glory." Five replied
Your heart hurt hearing that he had gone hungry not just once but multiple times in the apocalypse. He never deserved what he went through, but you weren't going to bring up these thoughts now. You could tell from his tone he wasn't hurting as he recalled this memory. He was happy.
"I remember being hesitant to take it off and hand it over even though I knew it was the person's job to clean it. I took the photo of you out and held it in my hand, inside my pocket because I was so worried about losing you." Five mused "And the poor guy, I practically threatened him to let me watch the process because I was so concerned about something going wrong and the locket being ruined forever."
Five tilted his head to look at you and you looked up matching his gaze. The light of the moon, still in the sky, trickled in through curtains and shone in your eyes. This was all he had ever hoped for and you were everything he ever wanted.
"It was fine though because watching all that dirt and grime come off the locket was almost like wiping those 45 years away. It gave me hope I'd see you again." Five stated happily "And look at me now. I've got you by my side and I'm the luckiest man in the world for it."
You smiled at his words. You loved him so much and he loved you beyond compare. No person, no place, no time, could ever keep you and your love for each other apart. You were two halves of a whole and there was not one without the other. Five gently placed his lips on yours giving you a light kiss before pulling back and softly stating,
"I love you."
"I love you too." You replied
You could hear as Five hummed happily to himself and wondered what it was in response to.
"What?" You questioned happily
"It's just nice to be able to say that without a sense of urgency behind it." Five answered
"Yeah. It is." You replied
The room went quiet, and you could feel yourself growing tired as you lay wrapped up in each other's arms. You traced tiny hearts into his back with your finger but as your eyelids began to droop one more question came to mind.
"Hey, lover?" You quietly called
"That's a new one," Five joked before responding "Yes lover?"
"Promise we'll build a good life together?" You asked
"Of course my love. Whatever it takes, we'll get there." Five responded sweetly
"Okay." You said sleepily "Good."
And with that confirmation, you let your eyes fully shut and fell asleep to the sound of Five's beating heart. Although you had fallen asleep, Five laid awake a little longer thanking whatever force was out there that he finally got this moment. He finally had his peace and the slice of life he always hoped he could have. Placing a gentle kiss on the top of your head, Five softly said,
"Tomorrow is a new day ma chérie,"
But although he addressed the sentiment to you, that sentiment was really a reassurance to himself. He was going to give you the best life, he promised he would. Reminding himself of the good he now had and the future he was now gifted, Five whispered into the dark night once more,
"Tomorrow is a new day."
And so Five laid there silently, thinking of all the way he was going to spend his life with you until tiredness had finally caught up to him and he too fell asleep.
The night came and went bringing forth the new day. As sunlight trickled in through the curtains and the sound of the city in full swing began to ring through the walls, you slowly opened your eyes. Though they were barely open you could see all you needed to, which was the face of your love sleeping peacefully. His dark hair messily fell in front of his face as he slept and for once looked so at ease, so genuinely calm compared to all the times he had been stressed out over his 18 consecutive days of apocalyptic chaos. Carefully, you reached out a hand and brushed the hair away trying not to disturb his slumber. Your efforts were not successful though as even the gentlest touch startled him awake. You could only imagine that he was a very light sleeper given his circumstances. You knew that was probably the case because you were the same. Trying to get him to fall back asleep you, stroked his hair as you quietly apologized,
"Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you."
"What time is it?" Five asked groggily
Looking over his shoulder at the clock on the nightstand you could see that it read 9:27 am.
"Just about 9:30," You replied
As he heard your response Five's body began to kick into gear. 9:30? It was already so late in the day. He had stuff to do. There were tasks at hand. If you both didn't get going now then who knows what could happen.
"Shit, we have to get up. We have to get going." Five stated as he sat up in bed
"Where?" You questioned also sitting up before adding "The world is saved and you're retired."
"What?" He asked looking at you
"You're retired...?" You reiterated, baffled by his behavior
Five looked down at his lap, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"I'm retired?" Five questioned to himself
And then he thought about those words. I'm retired. They played over in his mind on repeat as he looked towards the window. He could see the sight of other buildings through the blinds and the sunlight that shone into the room you two shared. He could hear the sound of the cars passing in the city below and the sound of voices echoing down the corridor outside. And then he looked at the clock which now read 9:30 am exactly. He pinched himself for a moment trying to make sure this wasn't just a dream that he would wake up in the apocalypse from, but as he felt the sting of his skin being held too tight he realized this was real. There was a world outside, things were okay, you were here, everyone was alive.
He. Was. Retired.
"I'm retired." He stated to himself, slight disbelief in his voice
But the more he thought about it, the more the disbelief washed away and was replaced by joy. He was retired. There was nothing that he needed to do. There were no requirements of him anymore. He could do whatever he wanted. He finally had to chance to just live his life. A chance to live his life with you. Excitement flooded his system and a smile formed on his face as he turned towards you and exclaimed,
"I'M RETIRED!"
You smiled back at him but before you could get a word out Five had taken your face in his hands pressing his lips against yours. He had the world at his fingertips and he was not about to let go. Soft and slow your lips moved in sync with each other only ever parting briefly before immediately connecting once more. Intense love radiated off of you both as you melted into the kiss and let emotion take over. But even so, there was too much space, too much distance between you two. You had both lived lives filled with distance from the other but that wasn't the case anymore. Five's hand dropped from your face before gripping your waist tightly as he tried to pull you closer to him. Closing the distance between your two bodies you straddled yourself over his lap, wrapping one arm around his neck and placing your other hand on his chest.
Surprised by your action, Five pulled back from the kiss and look towards you as golden sunlight shone over you, giving you an angelic glow. Your body was barely a few inches away and yet this was the closest to heaven he had ever been. Five Hargreeves was not really a believer in a higher power but if there was ever anything he was going to worship like his life depended on it, it would be you. You were his holy place, his new religion and all he wanted at that moment was to show you the depth of his devotion. He was entranced by all that you were, unable to do anything but look on in awe.
But with the way he pulled back, and his shocked and quiet demeanor, you began to worry that you may have crossed a line. Not wanting to do anything that would make him uncomfortable, you slowly began to move yourself away as you diverted your eyes and apologized,
"I'm sorry I assumed this is what you wanted."
Before you could get off his lap though, he had already pulled you back. There was no space between you two as your body pressed against his.
"It is." He replied
Your eyes locked back onto his. His once bright green eyes were now clouded with desire. There were words you wanted to say, confident remarks you wanted to make about how you felt, but the way he was looking at you put you in a trance. You had no words, only the growing passion you felt for him. Your heart raced in your chest as you brought your face towards his once more, pressing your forehead against his. A sea of lust now reflected in your eyes and it seemed like the whole world had disappeared from around you. And then you heard him whisper those three words,
"I want you."
The world stood still for a moment as you gazed into each other's eyes and saw all you ever wanted in them. It was as if time itself slowed down for the two of you to take each other in, but just like that, the world resumed and everything began to speed up. You acted solely on adrenaline and instinct. Your lips crashed into each other, desperate and hungry, and your bodies ran on auto-pilot as you tried to satisfy the passion you both craved. After years of longing for the other, starving for intimacy, you were finally able to get your fill. And you were going to treasure every pleasure you both received. Every kiss, every touch, every experience was now yours to share and yours to keep.
Your arms wrapped around his neck and your fingers tangled into his hair gently tugging on it. You could hear the way he groaned as he kissed you and you took the opportunity to slip your tongue into his mouth. He froze for a second taken back by your boldness but immediately jumped back into things and reciprocated the gesture. The two of you continued to melt into one as you slowly leaned back onto the bed, your boyfriend pinning you between himself and the mattress. Breaking the kiss, Five brought his lips to your jaw as he slowly trailed down it. His breath on your skin sent a chill up your spine as you tilted your head to the side, wordlessly begging for his lips on your neck. Taking the cue, he moved to work on your neck, slowly leaving kiss after kiss as he made his way down to the crook of it. The marks Lila had left healed overnight now leaving him with a completely open canvas to work with. Gently he nipped and sucked at the sensitive skin making you his own personal art piece.
Your skin was hot and the clothes that covered you both were doing nothing to help that. As your lust continued to grow, the fabric between your two bodies now started to feel restricting, like a prison keeping you two apart. You were dying to get closer and reached toward the hem of each other's shirts beginning to grab at the fabric. But as both of you were ready to risk it all, the sound of knocking could be heard from the door. Both of you looked towards it for a moment before looking back at each other.
"Did you hear that?" You questioned
"Yeah, but it probably just came from a nearby room." Five replied
The two of you stayed silent waiting to see if there was any more noise coming from the direction of the door, but with no other sounds to be heard, you turned back to the manner at hand. With a playful smirk coming to your face you asked,
"Where were we?"
Five leaned back down, ready to kiss you again and show you the depth of devotion, but before your lips could connect a knock came from the door once more. With that sound you both knew someone was at the door, specifically your door, looking for you. You really didn't want to go answer but if they stayed after you didn't respond the first time, they probably weren't intent on leaving.
"I'll get it." You stated, letting out an annoyed huff
Five rolled off you to the side, letting you get up from the bed and head to the door. Laying on his back, he looked at the ceiling wondering if there was a god out there, what did he do to make them hate him?
Getting to the door you tried to put on a good face for whoever may be on the other side. Taking a breath you opened the door with a smile and saw who was standing on the other side.
"Hey (Y/N)!" Klaus greeted
"Hello, Klaus." You greeted back trying to hide your annoyance
"Motherfucker." Five said angrily under his breath "Again?!"
Hearing Klaus' name fall from your mouth sent a wave of frustration through Five's system. Klaus "Number Four" Hargreeves, the man with the worst timing ever. He just had to show up now, didn't he? After all that you and Five had done to save this family and yet once again you couldn't get a moment alone to yourselves.
As quiet as Five was trying to be with his irritation, the sounds of his complaining could be recognized even at the lowest of decibels. Realizing that Five was in the room, Klaus finally took a good look at you, rather than just seeing you in the doorway. He saw the way you were attempting to hide your contempt, obviously displeased at him being there. Your hair was a mess, your clothing just slightly disheveled, and there was an unmistakable mark of a hickey forming on your neck.
"Sorry, did I interrupt something?" He asked, attempting to lean into the room
Moving to the side, you blocked him from peering in any further and seeing Five on the bed. While you had shared a room with Five before, you didn't need news traveling back to Diego. Especially not from Klaus. Diego was always so back and forth on whether he was okay with Five existing in your presence or not that you didn't need the extra drama. Trying to move away from the topic you denied saying,
"Nope. Nothing at all."
Klaus knew that you were obviously trying to hide what was going on and for a moment, he felt a little bad. He never intended to interrupt you two, especially given how much he knew you two needed this. But at the same time, this was the most entertainment he had gotten in a while and he was going to milk the hell out of it. Keeping his composure, he leaned back away from the door and decided to fake ignorance.
"Oh great! So Diego and I are having breakfast at 10 in the lobby and I came to let you know. In case you want to join." Klaus mentioned before adding "Unless you're busy of course."
"Nope. Breakfast sounds great." You lied
Unconsciously, you bit at your bottom lip hoping that Klaus would leave soon. Noticing your persistence in keeping Five hidden he decided to press on that fact. Trying to hide the smirk that was forming on his face, Klaus asked,
"Great! But hey, have you seen Five? I woke up this morning and he was missing from his bed. I thought maybe you would know where he is."
Your eyes darted quickly over to your boyfriend who was continuing to scowl and shoot daggers in Klaus' direction even though you knew he wasn't visible from where Five laid. You looked back over to Klaus who stood there quietly waiting for an answer.
"Nope." You dismissed "Haven't seen him since dinner yesterday."
"Oh, alright." Klaus replied, "Well then, I'm gonna head to the lobby."
"Alright." You replied beginning to shut the door
You started to watch as Klaus walked away, but before you could fully get the door closed he paused and called out,
"Oh and (Y/N)?"
"Yes?" You questioned impatiently
"You might want to cover that before Diego sees." Klaus comments tapping the crook of his own neck "I don't think the hotel would appreciate a pay-per-view boxing match in the lobby."
Your face went pale as your hand shot up to cover your neck. You could see the smirk fully on Klaus' face as he turned away and began to walk off.
"See you two at breakfast!" He shouted
He had known the whole time. Shit. Closing the door, you walked over to the mirror in the room and lowered your hand looking at the purple mark on your neck. From behind you, you could see Five get up from the bed and walk over to you complaining,
"I can't fucking believe Klaus showed up again."
"I can't believe you marked me." You commented
"Sorry." Five apologized
He was not sorry though. He just wasn't happy that you two got caught by Klaus. Again. He didn't need his brother getting any ideas to rub it in that he knew.
"I never said it was a bad thing..." You replied, "I just need to figure out what to do about it so Diego doesn't see."
"Well, I could leave four more and you can claim they're from Lila choking you yesterday." Five suggested
"You realize fresh bruises look different from old ones, right?" You mentioned, turning around to look at him.
"Perhaps," He explained, "But as we both know Diego is very stupid."
"I think you just want to leave more," You teased
"No..." Five poorly deflected
"Liar." You said giving him a playful shove before walking over towards your bag "I'll fix it but we might as well get ready to go to breakfast with them. I'm worried about Klaus blabbing if we don't get there on time."
"Yeah, you're probably right." He relented
Grabbing some clothes and care products from the bag that Sloane had given you, you passed Five and walked over to the door. Holding the items you got in one hand you grabbed the door handle with the other as you said,
"Alright, well I'm going to go get ready in the bathroom then and you can get ready here."
"I don't have any clothes to change into." Five replied gesturing at the pajamas you loaned him before lamenting "I mean I guess I could go grab the academy uniform..."
You paused for a moment. Neither you nor he wanted him back in that dumb academy uniform. Thinking for a second about where you could get him something else to wear you recalled that there was a lost and found room on the bottom floor in the back of the hotel, next to the ballroom.
"Well, if you don't mind walking around the hotel in those pajamas I know a place we can get you some clothes when I get back." You suggested
Five had no problem walking around in his robe yesterday so going around in some pajamas wasn't an issue for him.
"Sure,"
"Okay, I'll be right back." You replied
And with that, you walked out the door and down the hall towards the bathroom leaving Five alone in the room. Sitting back on the edge of the bed he was still annoyed with Klaus for getting in the way of spending quality time with you. He didn't know whether it was intentional or not but he couldn't change it now. Well. Technically he could, but he could only go back a few minutes and at this point, it wouldn't be enough time to change the course of Klaus showing up. Klaus was gonna have to propose some kind of grand gesture if he was ever going to make it up to him.
As he looked around the room waiting for you to come back he saw a book he had never seen before on the nightstand. It was leather bound but there was no title on the front or the side. It looked old. Perhaps it was one that you got in the 60s and brought with you. Curious as to what the book was about, Five picked it up causing an envelope to fall from the nightstand and drop to the ground. Picking up the letter he felt compelled to open it but once he did so his heart sank as he realized what was written. Grace from the 60s had passed away. Putting the letter back in the envelope he placed it back on the nightstand. He could only imagine how upset you might've been to read it and he started to regret not coming with you to your room when offered. Trying to think of a way to cheer you up, he picked up the book once more. Maybe the subject matter in it was something he knew about and you two could talk about it to take your mind off things. But as he opened the book though he was let down once again as he read the inscription. Charlie was dead too.
"Ah shit." Five said to himself "I actually liked that guy."
You hadn't mentioned either of these things to him so far and he wasn't going to force it out of you either, but he knew that he had to do something to make things better for you. Sometimes you wore your heart on your sleeve and other times it seemed like you would just rather forget. And from the way Charlie's inscription went, it seemed pretty evident that the latter was the option you were going with. Even if you didn't want to discuss it now he still wanted to help you feel safe in this timeline. He wanted to make you happy. He wanted to build a good life with you just like he promised. Closing the book and placing it back down on the nightstand, started to think of ways to help make you happy. But just as he had correctly placed the book back, you had arrived back to the room now ready for the day ahead. You had on a pretty white knee-length sundress, a smile on your face, and you had somehow managed to hide the mark on your neck.
"You ready to get some new clothes?" You questioned
"Yeah. But how did you fix it?" He asked tapping his neck
"Just some concealer, but I'm sure it'll heal soon." You answered, "My friends always joked I had a regenerative factor to me."
Huh. Five had never thought about that before. It was odd to think he never picked up on it but it did seem like most of you all had a regenerative ability. Just yesterday he had a giant gash on his forehead but hours later it was completely gone. It wasn't fully necessary information, but he would keep it in mind.
"So clothes?" You asked
"Clothes." Five replied
Standing up from the bed, Five took your hand in his, and together you walked out the door and made your way down to the bottom floor of the hotel. Exiting the elevator together you guided him toward where you last remembered the lost and found to be. Fortunately enough, just like everything else in the hotel, nothing had changed and the lost and found was exactly where you recalled it to be. Opening the door, you pulled Five along inside as you looked about the place. The room was filled with clothes and accessories on racks and bins organized by size, item, and gender. Boys and men on the left side of the room, girls and women on the right, and unisex clothing against the back wall. It was like a thrift store of decades worth of clothing, but free.
"Here it is! The lost and found room." You announced
"Jeez, this place could practically be its own department store." Five commented
"Yeah, it's always open but rarely anyone actually comes back this way and most people here aren't going to make a fuss and draw attention to themselves anyways, so it just kind of builds up." You explained, "But the staff still seems to maintain it pretty well though which means that there's plenty of options for you to choose from."
"How did you even know this was here?" Five asked
"Charlie and I stumbled upon it one day as we were walking around and so we used to take from here a lot." You answered, "And if they're following protocol, all the clothes should be already washed so you can just put whatever you like on right away."
"Good to know." Five replied
Staying in place, he looked around at all the clothes. It was a bit overwhelming as he had never really had too much of a choice in what he could wear. Back in the academy, it was his uniform, in the apocalypse, it was what clothes he could find, and for the commission, it was the suit that was given to him. But now he stared at a sea of options and didn't really know what he wanted.
Seeing your boyfriend stand in the room unmoving you tried to encourage him saying,
"Go on. You can pick whatever you want!"
"I just- I don't really know what I want." He replied, "I've never had a choice before."
"Well, since you're retired I would recommend finding clothing that's comfortable, weather appropriate for early April, and calls to you when you see it." You suggested
Five nodded his head, still slightly overwhelmed by his amount of choices but feeling more focused now that he had some criteria to work with. Slowly, he moved from his spot and walked over to the left side of the room searching for clothing that fit the requirements. Comfortable, weather appropriate, and interesting.
As you watched your boyfriend begin to peruse the items about the room, you noticed a calendar on the wall near the entrance. Checking it you saw it was accurate to the year but had not been changed to the correct month yet. Flipping it to April you were still in slight disbelief that you had made it past the 2019 apocalypse. It was April 3rd, and things seemed to be okay. You smiled as you realized how interesting it was that technically just four days ago on March 29th you and Five had started dating. And the anniversary of your friendaversary from years ago was coming up on April 7th. As you thought about those two dates, gears started turning in your mind. Flipping back to March you counted the days between the 29th and April 3rd and then counted the days between the 3rd and the 7th. After your counting, you confirmed your suspicions, today April 3rd was smack dab in between both of those anniversaries. Coming to this revelation, you knew that you had to do something special about it. Five was finally retired and getting to start over, why not make him happy and celebrate this new start?
As Five continued to search for clothes you tried to think of something to surprise him with and then the perfect idea hit you. Down the hall behind an unmarked door was the valuables room. It was like the lost and found but for anything that, like the name implied, had value. There had to be something there that you could give to him. Heading back to the door you called out,
"Love, I'm gonna step out for a second."
Five's head snapped towards you as he stopped looking through the shirt rack and asked,
"Do you want me to come with you?"
"No, I'll be okay." You answered, "I'll be right back."
Five gave you a quizzical look but you had only caught a glimpse of it before heading down the hallway to where the room was. When you got to the door, you didn't even attempt to see if it was unlocked and instead opted to just walk through it. Like the lost and found, the room was just as you remembered when you first stumbled upon it. The walls were lined with display cases that were filled with expensive jewelry, watches, assorted weapons, art, and antiques. You looked about the room for something that would make a good gift when one item caught your eye. It wasn't something you would gift to Five, but it stopped you in your tracks. Approaching the assorted weapons cabinet you saw a sleek metal bow with a quiver full of arrows displayed on one of the shelves. You stared at it, unmoving, but before your thoughts could spiral you had snapped your gaze away and began at other items. On a lower shelf in the case, you saw a bunch of blades laid out. Diego had always gifted you a new one every time you accomplished something big or had a reason to celebrate so you knew one of these could make a good gift. You didn't want to get Five something large or inconvenient or could be misconstrued as a tool for violence as you knew that he was done with killing. He needed something useful and small unlike the swords and daggers on display. But there, in the back corner of one cabinet, you spotted something that could work. Reaching your hand through the glass you pulled out a switchblade. It was compact, it was practical, it was perfect. Pleased with your choice you turned around looking for a box to put it in when another item on a different display caught your attention.
"Holy shit, that's a Rolex." You said aloud
In the middle of a sea of other very nice watches sat a beautiful Rolex. You felt bad for the guy who lost the item and had it left here but you were sure happy for yourself because you knew just the man who deserved that watch. Reaching through the glass you pulled the watch from the display case, and as you held an item in each hand you knew that you had found the perfect gifts to give your boyfriend. Satisfied by your brief adventure, you made the gifts items invisible, walked through the door once more, and headed back to the lost and found where you found your boyfriend putting on a flannel shirt over a new set of clothes. It was odd to see him in such casual clothing but he pulled it off really well.
"Well don't you look handsome." You complimented
"You think so?" He asked looking down at his outfit
He wasn't really sure if what he had picked out was good because he never had to make that decision before, but if you thought that he looked good then perhaps he was on the right track.
"Yeah, I really like it. You look normal." You answered before quickly adding "I mean that in a good way."
Five smiled. He knew what you were meaning to say.
"I like looking normal too." He responded and then asked, "Where did you go?"
"I went to go get something for you," You stated
"For me?" He questioned
"Mhmm." You replied, "Now close your eyes and put your hands out."
Five looked at you curiously, but nevertheless, he obliged. Closing his eyes he put his hands up and out as he waited for something to happen. Gently, he could feel a few things being placed in his hands. Both were relatively light but one felt colder than the other like it was made out of metal. He continued to keep his eyes closed until you said,
"Okay, you can open them."
Opening his eyes he saw in his hands a closed switchblade and a...Rolex? He stared in disbelief at the items extremely appreciative of the gifts but confused as to why.
"What are these for?" He inquired, his eyes trained on the items
"For you!" You exclaimed, "For your retirement and our anniversaries."
Five's head shot up from the gifts and looked at you with wide eyes.
"Anniversaries?" He repeated, trying to hide the panic in his voice
You nodded your head yes at him which sent his mind racing every which way. What did he forget? And how did he forget more than one? He never forgot anything about you. At least he didn't think so, but this situation was proving otherwise. Nothing was coming to mind so what important things happened on April 3rd? Oh no, was he a bad boyfriend for forgetting? He just wanted to make you happy today because of what happened to Charlie and Grace and he was already failing. Shit.
"Yeah, today is exactly in between March 29th when we got together, and April 7th which was the day you put together our friendaversary." You explained
"Oh." He replied
Five's panic subsided as he realized what you had meant by anniversaries. Yes, those two anniversaries did exist. They were two of the four most important days in his mind, including also your shared birthday and the day you met. As he thought about it though, April 7th made sense but you two had gotten together on March 29th, 2019 which was barely a few days ago.
"But we haven't been together a year?" Five stated confused
"I mean our timelines have been pretty messed up since our teens and I experienced like four March 29ths during the 60s, and we've both had plenty of April 7ths so that's gotta count for something right?" You responded
"You know what, you're right." Five agreed "Why get into technicalities when the other option is to celebrate?"
With each new thing, today was starting to be more and more promising for a bright future with you. He had a room with you, he finally got some real rest, he was retired, he was getting new clothes that he liked and on top of it all, he now had even more to celebrate with you. Placing the items in his pockets, he looked at you again and asked,
"Where did you manage to find a Rolex and switchblade on such short notice though?"
"Definitely not from the unmarked valuables room down the hall that doesn't exist." You answered sarcastically
"I see. Well since it doesn't exist, I won't keep it in mind." Five said mimicking your tone before sincerely stating "Thank you, darling,"
Five could see the pride in your eyes and the joy in your smile from knowing that he liked the gifts you gave him. You were amazing. God he loved you. And even when he thought he couldn't love you more, you always gave him a new reason to. He still didn't know why out of the billions of people in the world you still chose to be with him but he wouldn't have it any other way. But if he was going to show that, he needed to get ahead on this new anniversary curve. You came out of nowhere with such nice things and he had nothing to present back. He didn't exactly know what to do yet, but he would figure it out.
"You're welcome, love." You replied taking his hand "Now since you've figured out your attire we should probably get a move on. The fastest way to get to the lobby is to use the elevator on the other side of the ballroom,"
"Lead the way."
Hand in hand, the two of you walked out of the lost and found and down one of the many hallways of the hotel passing by rooms like the kitchen, the laundromat, and storage before finally making your way to a closed set of double doors. Letting go of Five's hand you opened one of the doors and stepped in, holding the door open for him to step in as well. As he stepped in beside you, you let the door close and took a few steps forward gesturing at the room, saying,
"Here it is, the ballroom."
Quietly, the two of you began to walk across the room towards the elevator both taking in the sights. The last time you were here, it was for one of Reginald's work events in which you and Charlie just hung out in the corner avoiding the other people your age, because honestly, they sucked. Dust covered the tables and it seemed like you and Five were the first people in here in a while. Not really needing to catch up much on the room you began to walk ahead of Five.
He however was taking in the room more than you were. The walls were white and large windows let tons of natural light. There was a small patio outside and inside round tables filled most of the space on the floor. Halfway through the room though there was a stage and a wooden dance floor.
"Y'know, it's not terrible looking like the rest of this place." Five commented
"Well, it used to get used for a lot of events. Mostly weddings," You explained "but I don't think it's seen an event in years though."
"I can tell. The dance floor looks pretty neglected." Five replied, stopping in the middle of the floor "Although perhaps we could change that?"
You stopped walking as you looked back over your shoulder at Five. There on the dance floor, he stood with his eyes trained on you. The corners of his mouth upturned as he extended his right hand out.
"Dance with me." He said softly
The smile that formed on your face mimicked that of your boyfriend as you turned around and began to approach him. Five watched as you made your way to him, and it gave him a sense of deja vu. You in a white dress, absolutely beaming at him, reminded him of his hallucination from yesterday. And being explicitly told this room was used for prior weddings just rang the thought in his head once more. As you reached out your left hand, Five took it in his own, his thumb running over the top of your knuckles lingering just slightly on your ring finger. There was nothing there, he knew that already, but one day. Pulling you closer to him, his left hand rested on your waist as his right hand continued to hold yours, as your free hand gently rested on his shoulder. There was no music, but you didn't need it as the two of you slowly danced along the floor. Five looked into your eyes, seeing his whole future ahead of him and thinking of the day that he could make you his wife. You'd dance just like this, his family looking on happily as you started a new chapter of your forever together. He knew that day wasn't anytime soon, there was a lot to do between now and then but as always the thought would stay in the back of his mind. As the two of you continued to sway, Five leaned his head down pressing his forehead against yours as he whispered,
"Je n'ai jamais été aussi heureux que je le suis avec toi, ma chérie."
"Et vous êtes tout ce dont j'ai besoin, mon chèri." You softly replied
Gently, you tilted your head up letting your lips fall on his. Softly you pressed a kiss to his lips, it was nothing grand compared to some of the ones you shared early but it was calm and it was sweet. It was like a pretty bow that tied up a perfect moment in time, turning it into a gift that you could cherish. As you parted from the kiss and your dancing began to halt, you couldn't help but think about how lucky you were to have him. Carefully, you let go of your embrace but continued to hold hands as Five suggested,
"Let's go get something to eat."
Together you walked to the elevator in the corner of the room and stepped inside leaving the empty ballroom behind. Hitting the button to the first floor, the elevator rode up and opened to the main lobby. The two of you walked out of the elevator but as you began to walk towards the bar where breakfast was you saw a man with a cart full of clothing labeled lost and found. And you passed by the cart Five saw two items that stood out to him, that he just had to get.
"Is that stuff going to the lost and found?" He asked
The worker stopped the cart and nodded his head yes, gesturing to the writing on the side of it.
"I think some of my stuff might be in there." He stated
You gave your boyfriend a confused side eye as you watched the exchange. What stuff? You just got him new clothes from the lost and found. Five did not see your glance though and instead picked out a hat and vest from the box, immediately putting them on before walking away from the cart and over to you. As he approached, you saw the two new additions to his outfit, both of which absolutely screamed retired fisherman. Although you liked the prior look without them a bit more, you found the additions to be adorable as he looked the part for retirement.
"Aww, cute. You look like you're going on a fishing trip." You commented
Five took note of your new reaction. Your reaction to him without the hat and vest was definitely different than the one to it. He went from handsome to cute, and while that was still positive, he wasn't really going for cute. But at the same time, he did like the hat and vest, and you didn't seem to hate it either, so he wasn't going to make a fuss over it. Especially with today being so special. Taking your hand once more, the two of you made your way to the lobby and over toward the bar where Five ordered two mimosas for you to enjoy.
"One for me," Five said picking up one of the glasses before handing the other to you "And one for the most amazing woman in the world."
Taking the glass from him, you placed a kiss on his cheek and said,
"Thank you, love. Also, Klaus and Diego are over there. We should join them."
With a nod of his head the two of you made your way from the bar over to the table but as you approached some kid got in the way commenting,
"Christ, what a dump."
You gave a sideways glance at the kid who sat alone at a booth across the bar. His comment was correct but where the hell did he come from? Ignoring him you walked with Five up to the table where Klaus and Diego sat but as you approached you heard Klaus ask,
"That little delinquent is your son?"
"Allegedly my son." Diego replied
"That's so funny!" Klaus laughed
You and Five looked at each other as you each took a seat wondering if you had heard them right. Did they just imply the kid you passed was Diego's son? That made no sense. Trying to figure out what was going on Five questioned,
"Wait, who's the mother?"
"Lila." Diego replied flatly
"Excuse me?" You asked shocked
No, no. This couldn't be right. He couldn't be stupid enough to have gotten her pregnant, right? He and Eudora were the ones who gave you "the talk" so he knew what could happen if you weren't safe about things. And with Lila? Five mentioned them getting together like...once. Sure, it only takes one time but it just wasn't processing that this could be real. Hell, he didn't even look like either of them. Sure genetics was weird, and there was a chance he'd come out looking like milk but the probability was low. It didn't make sense.
"Whoa, Lila's here?" Five asked concerned
"Was." Diego responded, "She dropped him off in my lap last night then bolted."
"I don't much care for that one," Klaus remarked
"Don't." Diego replied, raising a scolding finger toward him
Five thought about the situation at hand if, that kid over there was truly Diego and Lila's child then no matter how annoying it was, she was part of their group now.
"Technically, she's family." Five commented
Your head whipped towards Five, your face a mix of shock and anger at his comment. The hell did he mean "family"? She tried to kill everyone less than a day ago.
"I'm sorry. What?" You snapped
"She was trying to murder us, like, yesterday." Klaus ranted
"Like I said, family." Five replied, annoyance laced in his voice
"Number Five Hargreeves, she tried to kill me. You saw the bruises on my neck." You scolded appalled at him calling her family
"Oh, we all saw them." Klaus chimed in, giving Five a grin
Five elected to ignore Klaus' teasing as your anger was coming off you in flames. Literally. You were beginning to flicker as your gaze buried its way into the deepest parts of his soul. And you had used his full name, number and all, which meant that he had truly fucked up. He didn't want you to be mad, especially not given your new start. He needed to remedy this faux pas before it could get worse.
"I didn't mean it sincerely. I should've had more sarcasm in my tone." Five stated trying to fix the situation before asking "Diego, is she coming back?"
You relaxed a little more seeing as Five had meant his comments sarcastically, not that he truly viewed her as family and was actively asking when she would return, probably so she could pick up the kid and leave.
"Well, she goddamn better be because we got more important things to be dealing with right now!" Diego shouted, catching the boy's attention
"Calm down. Shh." Klaus tried to calm
But even if you began to ease up on Five, you were still mad at Diego though. And with each passing second, it continued to boil and grow within you until you finally, in a steady but indignant laced tone, asked,
"So that little white boy is your and Lila's kid?"
"Like I keep saying, allegedly." Diego answered
"I can't fucking believe you." You replied disgustedly
"What do you mean?" Diego questioned confused
"What do I mean?" You asked rhetorically before ranting the answer "I get a three-hour comprehensive lecture on reproduction and contraceptives and shit from you and Eudora and was quizzed on it all because I was allegedly 'watching the shirtless Spiderman scene one too many times' when I was 14. But you can just go and raw dog it?"
"First of all, you kept rewinding and replaying it for 20 minutes." Diego stated firmly
"And?" You asked forcefully
"And you were 6 inches from the TV screen and drooling." Diego retorted
"He was hot, he was shirtless, he was covered in blood and god damn it, I wouldn't have swerved his ass like Gwen Stacy did." You responded angrily counting each point you made on your finger "What did you want? Me not to be attracted?"
"YES!" Diego shouted
"Uh oh, daddy-daughter fight." Klaus said loud enough for only Five to hear him
Five heard what he had said but didn't acknowledge it though as he processed the information that was going back and forth. You didn't write about this in your journal. He never heard anything about your love for Spiderman. Why were you so into him? His powers weren't even that cool. Five could jump through space and time while he was just a bug guy. He wasn't even a real superhero. Five had been though, he was an actual superhero. And anyway you had called him hot before, he was shirtless last night, and he had been covered in blood plenty of times. Sure those were all separately, but what did Spiderman have that he didn't have now? He was way better than Spiderman.
"Oh my god, it doesn't matter that much, Diego." You replied, rolling your eyes
"It does! Just like how you know that term matters!" Diego exclaimed
"What term?" You asked, your eyebrows furrowing in confusion
"Y'know..." Diego mentioned his sentence trailing off
"What? Raw dogging?" You asked nonchalantly
"Yeah! How do you know what that even is?" Diego questioned firmly, glaring at Five
Five looked back and forth between you and Diego confused as to what you were arguing about now. What the hell was raw dogging and why was Diego looking angrily at him about it? Five had a strong suspicion of what it meant given all the context clues but he didn't want to assume either so he said nothing. This whole situation was confusing and he still hadn't gotten over the Spiderman bit yet.
"Stop that. It's not because of him." You said back, smacking his arm
"Yet..." Klaus said under his breath
"You sent me to public high school." You shouted "It's just a box filled with awkward and frustrated teenagers so, of course, I'm going to learn about some terms while attending the local hormonal fuckhouse."
"Damn it. I knew I should've sent you to private school." Diego yelled back
"I would've rather died than go back to private school!" You jabbed
"I bet you wish you got to go to public school with her." Klaus commented, nudging Five with his elbow
Five looked from Klaus who had a playful smile on his face over towards you and Diego who luckily had not heard the comment he made. Pushing Klaus' elbow away Five retorted,
"Shut up Klaus."
"Also Viktoria was big into fanfiction and sent me some of the most explicit things I have ever read..." You offhandedly mentioned before returning to your main thought "But that's not the point. The point is you're a fucking hypocrite."
"Fine! I'm a hypocrite!" Diego yelled throwing his hands up in the air "But there's nothing we can do about it now."
"Um, we could go to a local lab and get a paternity test because there's no way the walking stack of computer paper is your child." You suggested passive-aggressively
Diego shut his mouth not knowing what to say. Yes, technically in this situation he was a hypocrite but he didn't appreciate the attitude you were taking with him, even if he did raise you to question authority. It wasn't a great situation but it was the one he was in and you both were just going to have to deal with it, unfortunately.
As you continued to look at Diego with revile displeasure, Five found the entrance he needed in the conversation to try and turn the mood around. For you at least. Diego's problem was more permanent. Gently, he ran his hand up and down your back as he slid your mimosa toward you and asked,
"Would you like to try the drink? I had some of mine and it's really good."
Breaking your death glare, you looked towards your boyfriend who had a sincere smile on his face but you could see the worry in his eyes. IF that child was Diego's kid, then that problem was something that he had to deal with. You were not going to ruin your boyfriend's first day of retirement over the fact that Diego was dumber than you thought. Picking up the glass you took a sip from the colorful straw and admittedly he was right. It was very good. Placing the glass back down you gave him a small smile as you said,
"It's delicious."
"Good. I'm glad." He replied
He knew you weren't 100 percent there yet after your verbal altercation but hopefully, he could get the day back on track to being something good for the both of you. As he smiled at you back and the table settled down, you all could hear a voice call out,
"Hey, where's Luther?"
"Who cares? Probably out for..." Diego began to say but trailed off as his eyes landed on Vanya "...a run."
The four of you sitting at the table saw as Vanya approached sporting a new short haircut. It was surprising to see for sure, but it looked good.
"Mmm! Love the haircut." Klaus complimented
"Me too!" You chimed in
Vanya smiled for a moment but then you quickly saw a demeanor change.
"So I, uh, talked to Marcus last night."
Everyone at the table but you looked on in shock.
"Wait, what? You talked with the enemy? By yourself?" Diego interrogated
You scowled at the word enemy. The Sparrows weren't the enemy. Sure some were a bit of a pompous asshole, but most of them were just traumatized superheroes. The Umbrellas would've acted the same way if they had actually ended up as a crime-fighting "success", but instead, they went their own ways and were now just traumatized people who just so happened to have superpowers. Either way, his black-and-white attitude towards the Sparrows was ignorant at best and callous at worst.
"They're not the enemy Diego. They're your enemy." You corrected
"What do you mean? Did you talk with the enemy too?!" Diego exclaimed
"Talked? I got a tour of the house. I had dinner with them. They even asked me to stay." You explained "They like me."
"You're in cahoots with the enemy?" Diego questioned
"I guess, but at least I'm not sleeping with them." You remarked
"I can't believe you two." Diego complained
"Hey, somebody had to do something." Vanya stated trying to get the conversation back on track
"And who elected you, Vanya?" Diego criticized
"It's, uh, Viktor," Viktor responded quietly
"Who's Viktor?" Diego asked confused
Viktor looked around at the group sitting around the table as you all waited for an answer. This was it, he had to let himself out of the box he was in. Just like he had done for Sissy. It would be doing her and himself a disservice not to do so, but stepping out into the open and hoping those around you accepted you as you are was still a daunting task. And he didn't know which way it would go until it happened.
You saw as Viktor paused, his words mulling over in your head, but quickly you realized what he had meant. And before you could even realize what you were saying you proudly stated,
"He is."
Viktor locked eyes with you and smiled at the fact that you acknowledged him as himself. You saw him for who he was before even any of his siblings had done. You were genuinely happy and supportive of him. That was no surprise though, you had always made him feel seen and supported and your support gave him that final push to be open.
"Yeah, I am. It's who I've always been." Viktor added before asking "Is that an issue for anyone?"
The table was quiet for a moment as Viktor waited for his brothers to respond to the announcement but after a brief moment Diego quietly said,
"Nah, I'm good with it."
"Yeah, me too. Cool." Klaus added
"It's wonderful." You reassured
"Truly happy for you, Viktor." Five stated, "But last time I checked, you don't speak for this family."
Your head quickly turned to Five as you gave him a look and not so subtly smacked his arm over his comment. Viktor had just come out to you all, this was not the time to be critical about undiscussed plans and actions. It wasn't surprising Viktor went off on his own to do his own plan, that's what all of the Hargreeves siblings did all the time. Also, what did he mean that he didn't speak for this family? Nobody spoke for the family because they wouldn't be able to decide on a speaker even if they tried. Turning back to Viktor, you changed your demeanor as you said in a more friendly tone,
"What he means is that we're confused about why you would do that without telling anyone first."
"Listen, it's fine, okay? Marcus totally gets it. He doesn't want a war any more than we do." Viktor said as he took a seat between you and Diego
"What are you talking about? He tried to homicide us!" Diego emphasized
"So did Lila, and you had a kid with her." Klaus teased
"That's not the point!" Diego exclaimed
"It's a valid one though." You mentioned rolling your eyes
"We made a deal. He's gonna give back Five's briefcase, then we're gonna get out of the timeline." Viktor explained, "We're gonna meet later today for the, uh, the handover."
"Oh, thank God!" Klaus cheered
Five shook his head and laughed to himself. This plan was ridiculous. There was absolutely no way they were leaving this timeline. The moon was in the sky, there were no impending nukes, and things were business as usual. And this whole briefcase plan, even if Viktor did manage to get it back, none of his siblings knew how to operate it and there was no way Five was going to show them how.
"That's a rookie move. Dude is playing you." Diego criticized, his voice low
"Oh, really?" Viktor complained
"Yeah, but maybe we can use this. And we turn it back on them, and then we wipe them the hell out." Diego suggested
"Diego, stop, please. And you're not gonna, like, do anything today." Viktor replied visibly frustrated
"Except bond with your spawn." Klaus teased once more placing a hand on Diego's shoulder
"Alleged spawn." Diego retorted
Pulling the straw out of your drink you brought the glass to your lips as you started to chug down the juice and alcohol mixture. Your mind reminisced on the times when you were an only child. It was so easy. So quiet. This is what you got for bringing yourself into a big family of trauma-ridden siblings. Consistent arguments with strong differing opinions. Typically, you could handle it but today you just wanted to relax and so the vapid commentary from all sides of the table was draining.
"I will get the briefcase, and then we will all go back and fix the timeline," Viktor stated firmly
"Hey, we're not going anywhere! This is a perfectly acceptable timeline." Five remarked
"Yeah, why don't you tell that to Allison, who's upstairs grieving her daughter, who doesn't even exist here!" Viktor retorted angrily
"Not to mention, we've been replaced by a bunch of blobs and cubes and BIRDS AND SHIT!" Diego shouted
Finishing your drink you cleared out every last drop before placing the glass on the table upside down signifying it was done. With the incessant bickering still going on around you, you leaned back in your seat as you closed your eyes, and pinched the bridge of your nose in frustration.
"I need a fucking vacation..." You groaned
While the others continued to debate, Five had noticed the way you pulled back. Your drink, now gone in its entirety and your body language screamed annoyance. But hearing your comment about needing a vacation was all he needed to know that this conversation was over. Today was supposed to be a day to celebrate and he, also tired of his siblings' protests, was going to put an end to it.
"News flash, geniuses! It's not about us! Take a look around. If you hadn't noticed, there's no doomsday. There's no apocalypse. The sun is shining. Birds are doing whatever the hell birds do. That's all that matters." Five chastised before concluding "We're done messing with time, I'm officially retired, and I will now be focusing all of my energy on the love of my life."
Hearing his words you opened your eyes and pulled yourself back into the moment. You could hear the sincerity in his tone as he told his siblings that there would be no more messing with time and that you were his main concern. Viktor and Diego looked at him in shock. He couldn't be serious right? Five Hargreeves, the time traveler and former assassin, didn't care about traveling to the right time or eliminating the threat of the Sparrows in this one?
Standing up, Five extended a hand to you as he stated softly,
"Come on darling let's go get breakfast."
A small smile came to your face as you placed your hand in his, getting down from your chair. He was trying to make things better, he was always trying to make things better, and you couldn't help but love him for it. Intertwining your fingers with his you stepped away from the chaos that was sitting at the table and walked towards the buffet to finally get something to eat. The rest of the crew watched from the table as you and Five waited in the buffet line to grab a plate. His arms now wrapped around your waist from behind, your back pressed against his chest as he happily peppered your cheek with small kisses causing you to smile wider.
"What has gotten into him? I don't think I've seen him this happy since...ever." Viktor commented
"It's the lovebug." Klaus mused "He's a whole new man. A lovey, sappy, romance-y type of man."
"Lovebug?" Viktor questioned
"Yes! Gentleman, we're looking at what Five would've become if he had never run away." Klaus exclaimed, his arms out gesturing to you and Five
The group turned their attention towards you and Five once more, with Klaus looking on happily, Viktor confused, and Diego disgruntled. As Five held you, you turned your head back and said something to him causing him to laugh. Finally grabbing plates, you stepped out of his arms handing one back to him. And as you walked to pick out your food, Five stood there looking at you with the utmost adoration. Diego shook his head disapprovingly as he complained,
"Gross. I want him to be a full-on prick again. At least then he wasn't all over my sister."
"Oh yeah, he's all over her now." Klaus commented
Diego's head snapped toward Klaus, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion as his mind started racing a million miles per hour.
"The hell you mean Klaus?" Diego interrogated
"Nothing, nothing." Klaus said waving him off "But you have to admit it's kind of sweet to see them so happy and in love."
"I guess." Viktor replied shrugging
"No." Diego stated firmly
Klaus frowned at the two of them. Sure Five wasn't doing anything to help Viktor with time travel and you and Diego were in a bit of a rough patch, due to Diego's actions, but that didn't mean they couldn't be supportive of you two. Their negativity wasn't something Klaus needed either. Especially if he was going to go find his birth mother. He needed someone with an open mind who would be willing to stick around and not have any other obligations. And he knew the perfect person to ask.
"Keep your negative energy to yourself then, I'm gonna go grab some food too," Klaus said as he got up from his seat
As you began to walk around the bar to grab food, you could feel a sharp chill run up your spine. Looking over your shoulder you saw a wall of energy come rushing towards you. The lights in the hotel flickered off as you stumbled to the side, dropping your plate and causing it to shatter on the ground. You leaned against the bar top using it to hold you up as your legs wobbled beneath you and bit at your bottom lip holding back the cry of pain in your throat. You watched as the energy wall rushed past back behind you before the feeling completely disappeared seconds later. As the lights came back on you stood on your own again catching your breath. That was the second time in less than 24 hours that something like that had happened. You weren't quite sure what it was but you hoped that you were still just recovering. As you looked at your broken plate on the floor, you could hear Five ask,
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. I bumped into the bar top when the lights went out and accidentally dropped my plate." You said
You were lying of course. But a couple of odd disturbances that only you could feel weren't enough for you to get him worried. He was finally retired. He was relaxed and happy. You didn't want to suggest something was going on and get him all concerned when maybe it was nothing.
"I'm gonna go tell someone about this and get a new plate." You explained as you began to walk away "I'll be right back."
"Oh okay," Five replied as he watched you leave
Heading over towards the food on the bar top Five lifted one of the buffet lids and began to scoop out some breakfast potatoes onto his plate. Before he could even get a second scoop though Klaus had approached him from behind and suggested,
"Hey. What do you say we get outta here, huh? Take a little road trip."
Five paused as he held the serving spoon in one hand and his plate in the other. Looking over at Klaus confused, Five inquired,
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about a sojourn to the countryside. You and me, the wind in our hair. Thelma and Louise on the open road." Klaus pitched
"You know they die in the end, right?" Five remarked as he served himself some fruit salad
"Holding hands, living our best life, my little cherub!" Klaus exclaimed before leaning in close and whispering aggressively "Listen to me. I nearly died from Luther's sleep farts last night because not all of us get the pleasure of leaving to have a midnight rendezvous with our lover."
"I thought you were asleep." Five replied as he began to walk away
"Between the noxious gas and you shaking the frame of the bunks to go parley with your ladylove it was difficult to be asleep at that time" Klaus reiterated "Point is, we need to get out of here, get some fresh air!"
Stopping in place, Five turned around to face his brother. He had no clue where this was coming from but he couldn't lie, it did sound kind of interesting. But the skeptic in him felt that there had to be some motive. Everyone had motives for doing things and he wasn't going to have his time wasted. Curious, Five asked,
"Okay, I'll bite. Why me, Klaus?"
"Because you said... you said you're retired, and that's what retired people do. And don't you deserve some fun?" Klaus reminded
Klaus was right, he did deserve some fun, and getting out of the crowded city and this rundown hotel would be nice. But it would be even better if you came along. You deserved a trip like this just as much as he did, maybe even more. You had done so much to help him save the world, twice, and put up with all of his siblings' bullshit on top of it. It would be nice to just get away with you. As Five mulled over his feelings about this idea, he noticed that the tank behind the bar that used to contain lobsters was now empty.
"There's no lobsters." Five stated confused
"Excuse me?" Klaus asked turning to look at the tank
"There were three lobsters in that tank a minute ago." Five replied
"Yeah, well, you know, maybe Chet blended 'em into a morning smoothie." Klaus commented mockingly
Five smirked at Klaus' dumb comment. He was worrying for no reason. Today was a good day and the more he thought about it, going off with what was arguably his most entertaining sibling didn't really seem all too bad. Looking up at Klaus, Five smiled as he remarked,
"You're an idiot, but I'm in."
Whoo!" Klaus cheered
"On one condition." Five added
Klaus looked at Five nervously. What kind of condition did he need to make to go on this trip? Why were there conditions at all? He just needed someone to come with him.
"Which is?" Klaus questioned
"(Y/N) has to come." Five stated
"Come for what?" You asked approaching the two
It took everything in Klaus' soul not to reply to your question with "Five", but he knew the minute that comment left his mouth, no matter how funny it might be, it would dissuade either of you from joining. And he needed people to go with him on this trip.
"Klaus wants to go on a road trip, but I told him I'd only go if you were with me." Five explained, "And we are celebrating a few anniversaries of ours, so we could consider this a celebratory trip."
"Oh, that sounds fun!" You replied excitedly
"Yeah, yeah. It'll be great! You can think of me as your personal chauffeur for your little honeymoon, you lovebirds." Klaus encouraged
You could feel a slight blush rise to your face as Klaus said the word honeymoon. Everyone knew that honeymoon was typically associated with weddings and while you weren't married to Five the thought of being so one day did give you butterflies. Taking your boyfriend's hand in yours, you said to Klaus,
"Sounds great."
"Yay!" Klaus exclaimed, " Well while you two go finish your breakfast, I'll go get one of the hotel cars, and then we'll head out and get a few road sodas for the journey and be on our way."
You and Five then watched as Klaus turned and walked away with a pep in his step. Grabbing yourself a new plate you served yourself some food from the buffet as you and Five went back to the table to sit down. Diego and Viktor had disappeared leaving just the two of you alone. Happily, you ate your breakfasts holding hands and discussing your day ahead. After the two of you had finished you went back to the room to grab some of the cash that Sloane had given you just in case you wanted to buy something and when you both came back down Klaus was waiting in the lobby ready to go. As a group, the three of you headed out of the hotel and hopped in the car with Klaus sitting in the front driving and you and Five sitting together in the back. Making your way down the city streets you pulled up to a gas station around the corner from the academy. Getting out of the car, you began to walk into the mini-mart with the other two when you remembered that you had a polaroid camera back at the academy. If you were going on a trip then you should take pictures to remember it and what better camera to do so than the fun old polaroid?
"Hey, darling?" You called
"Yeah?" Five replied stopping in his tracks
"I'm gonna go stop at the academy real quick, since y'know...I'm allowed to, and pick up a camera so we can take pictures of our trip okay?" You explained, "If you and Klaus finish before me just pull up outside and I'll meet you there."
"Uh sure. Okay." Five answered
He was slightly confused as this had come out of nowhere but having pictures to remember the trip didn't sound like a bad idea. And if what he remembered you saying at dinner last night and breakfast today was true, and the Sparrows did like you, then you would have no problem.
"Be back soon!" You said
Placing a quick kiss on Five's cheek, you immediately flashed away to the academy. Landing inside the foyer you saw the mess from yesterday was completely gone, and could only imagine that it was Grace who had spent the whole night cleaning it up. Part of you felt bad about it, doing all that work alone, but you had to remember that this wasn't your Grace and this wasn't your home. This was a home once, but not anymore. Stepping further into the room you could hear a familiar voice ask,
"You're back already?"
Turning on your heel, you saw Ben standing in the doorway to the parlor. The look on his face showed genuine surprise, but the delivery of his question was less than pleasant. Especially with the superior tone he took with everyone.
"Nice to see you too, Benjamin." You remarked
"It's Ben." He corrected
"Not to me." You replied flatly
The look of surprise on Ben's face turned into a scowl at your comment. You were insufferable. Why would you even show up here? Why did he have to be the first one to talk to you? He didn't even like you. At all. You were a smartass and were always running that pretty little mouth of yours. And once again with you around, he didn't know how to react. You put him off his game. He needed to get you out of his head. Changing the subject Ben interrogated,
"Do you have Marcus?"
Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion at his question. Why in the world would you have Marcus? There was no reason for him to be with you. You couldn't even guess where the guy happened to be.
"No? What do I look like, my Hargreeves keeper?" You answered, "I haven't seen Marcus since dinner last night."
Ben was now the confused one. You didn't have Marcus? Did you even know that they had taken Luther? Why did you decide to show up? What was your motive? He couldn't let these questions go unanswered. Walking over to you, he stood over you, glaring down as he further pressed,
"Then why are you here?"
"Because it's my fucking house and I can be." You spat before adding "Now unless you have any more stupid questions, I'm going to go find what I came here for."
Turning on your heel you began to walk away from him and towards the stairs. Every time you had to interact with Sparrow Ben it pissed you off more and more. He was nothing like the Ben you knew. The one who was there when no one else was, the one who listened to you, who cared for you. The Ben who liked you. You couldn't even find a glimpse of that Ben in this one. He was just an egotistical prick who didn't care for anyone except himself.
Ben's frustration grew as you walked away from him. How dare you leave him hanging?
"Hey, hey! They're not stupid questions!" Ben retorted stepping in front of you "What are you going to find?"
"A camera." You responded flatly
But Ben didn't move after you had finally answered his stupid line of questioning. You had dealt with enough bullshit from Diego and now you had to face Ben. You just wanted to have a nice day with your boyfriend and you weren't going to take this anymore. Grabbing his face with your hand, you pulled it down so that he was at eye level with you. Your nails dug slightly into the skin of his cheeks and he could see the fire in your eyes as you threatened in a low voice,
"Now get out of my way pretty boy or I'll make you."
Ben did not move though as he was frozen. His pulse picked up its pace just as it had done when you threatened him yesterday. He thought he could get the upper hand in this interaction if he just asserted himself. He could get back on his game but once again he was thrown for a loop by you. You were a challenge in a way he had never experienced and he didn't know what he was doing wrong. Why were you winning over him? What made you different than others he faced before?
With his lack of movement, you let out a huff and shoved his face off to the side causing him to stumble away. Rolling your eyes, you walked up the stairs and away from Worse Ben. As you faded out of sight though, a crow swooped down from the high ceiling of the foyer and onto the shoulder of Fei who had just stepped out from the downstairs hall.
"What was that all about?" Fei asked
"She called me pretty," Ben replied as he touched his face where you had just held it
"It was a threat." Fei reminded before asking "Why do you even care?"
"I don't." Ben stated firmly "I just need to figure out how she keeps beating me at my own game."
"Is it denial or are you dense?" Fei questioned
"What are you talking about?" Ben asked enraged while his eyebrows furrowed
A smirk came to Fei's face as she said aloud,
"Oh! Both."
Before Ben could say anything back though, Fei had already walked away quietly laughing to herself, leaving him all alone with his thoughts. Upstairs, however, you walked down the hall toward your old bedroom in search of the old polaroid camera that you had bought in the 60s. It was vintage and you thought that taking pictures with it would give them a cute nostalgic vibe. Which is why you were so determined to find it. As you approached your door though, you saw Sloane from down the hall.
"Hi, Sloane!" You greeted
Sloane's head shot towards where your voice called, her eyes wide with shock as she nervously exclaimed,
"Oh! (Y/N)! You're here! Right now!"
"I can't stay, I'm just here to get something." You replied
"Oh."
It was a lot faster than she had expected it to happen but if you had brought back Marcus then it was only fair to return Luther to you. She did think she would've gotten longer with him, but the conditions Ben set were the ones she was going to follow.
"Well, I guess I'll go get Luther then..." Sloane sighed
"Is Luther here..?" You asked confused
"Yeah, we took him because you kidnapped our Number One?" Sloane replied, now also confused
You both paused as you tried to figure out what was going on. But then slowly it started to make sense. Sloane realized you came for something that was not Luther. And you realized that the Sparrows had taken Luther because Marcus was missing. That's why Ben had asked if you had him. Trying to get Sloane to understand the situation you placed your hands on her shoulder and looked her dead in the eye.
"Sloane, I need you to listen to me carefully. The Umbrellas can barely work to put together a sandwich let alone pull off a kidnapping." You explained
Sloane looked at you blankly as all she could manage to reply was,
"Oh."
"We don't have Marcus." You emphasized
Sloane could tell you were serious in your statement. But if you didn't have Marcus then where was he? And now that you knew Luther was here, there's no way he could stay even if you didn't have Marcus.
"Well still since you know, it's not right to keep him..." Sloane lamented
You could see the way her face dropped as her gaze looked off to the side. The excitement she typically seemed to exude from the one day you had known her was practically gone. And of course, you knew why. She liked Luther and wanted to spend time around him. It was at this moment you knew you could do two things. One, you could take Luther back because having them kidnap him was wrong, effectively ruining your plans and disappointing Sloane. Or two, you could leave him, pretend you didn't know about this to keep your plans on schedule, and give Sloane and Luther a chance to interact since they liked each other. The choice was obvious.
"You can keep him."
"What?" Sloane asked in disbelief
"I came here for a camera so I can take pictures on a trip with my boyfriend." You stated before adding "I do not know of anything else going on in this house."
"You mean it?" She questioned
"Befriend him, flirt with him, hell you can fuck him for all I care." You answered, "Just don't kill him."
You could see the light in her eyes grow as a smile returned to her face. Sloane felt genuine joy at your action. No one had ever done anything for her like this before, even though she was always doing things for other people. There had to be some motive behind it right?
"Why are you doing this?" She asked
"Because you deserve a chance to get to know him and I think he wants to get to know you too." You responded sincerely
Sloane's smile widened as she realized you were doing this because it would make her happy. Your only motive was being a good friend. Sloane had never really had one of those before. It was a nice feeling. As the excitement built within her Sloane couldn't help but throw her arms around you.
"Thank you!" Sloane exclaimed, "You're the best!"
"Don't let him know I was here." You requested
Sloane pulled back from the hug, bringing a hand up to her lips and making the zipper motion across them.
"My lips are sealed." She replied
"Now there was a polaroid camera around this house, do you know where it is? I was about to check my old room for it." You asked
"I'm assuming you're talking about the old 60s camera?"
"Yeah."
"Oh yeah...Ben and I got into a fight over it and it broke..." Sloane explained before in a more upbeat tone added "But we got a newer one! I hid it in a tampon box in the bathroom closet because I knew he would never check there."
"Smart." You replied "Thanks, Sloane."
Smiling at her, you turned around and headed towards the bathroom to go find the camera. As you walked away Sloane said,
"There's a fresh pack of film in the box too!"
Although you didn't look back you gave her a thumbs-up as you entered the bathroom. Opening the bathroom closet you looked through the few boxes of tampons for the camera and film, finding it hidden in a box in the back. Taking the camera and film pack out of the box you stepped out of the bathroom and began to walk back to the main staircase. As you passed by Sloane's room, you have her a wave.
"Have fun with your boyfriend!" She shouted
"Good luck getting one!" You shouted back
You could hear the sound of her laughing which faded as you walked away. Making your way down the foyer stairs you headed towards the door when Ben stepped out from leaning against a wall and said,
"Hey."
"Aw, you waited here for me? How sweet." You mocked
"Where are you going?" He questioned
"Out." You said raising the camera "I got what I came for."
"You're not staying?" He asked
"Why? Were you hoping I would?" You remarked
"No." He replied flatly
"Well, then I'm leaving." You stated
Why the hell would he be so concerned about you staying if he didn't want you around? He was so weird. But that was none of your concern, you had better plans than to try and break down the psyche of Benjamin Hargreeves. Walking away you grabbed the door handle ready to leave when Ben called,
"(Y/N),"
You looked back over your shoulder towards him. What did he need now?
"Yeah?" You asked
He paused. He didn't have anything to actually say.
"Nothing." He replied
You gave him a confused look. What was wrong with him? Rolling your eyes you opened the door and walked out to find the car there, Klaus sitting behind the wheel and Five leaning against the car outside. Seeing him standing there, your eyes lit up and you smiled widely as you exclaimed,
"I got it!"
"Great, let's get going then." Five replied
Stepping away from the car, Five opened the back door, and as you approached he took your hand to help you get in. Before sliding into the backseat though, you leaned over and placed a quick kiss on his cheek, complimenting,
"What a gentleman."
Five smiled as he helped you get in before closing the car door and walking around to the other side. As he was about to open his door, he saw Ben standing in the doorway of the academy scowling at him. He had no clue what might've caused that reaction but it didn't matter. Opening his door he slid in next to you, and with the door closed, you, he, and Klaus were finally on your way.
Getting on the highway you saw the city buildings fade into suburbs which then turned into forests and farmland. As Klaus drove, you stretched your legs out in the backseat and snuggled up against Five. With his arms wrapped around you, you both looked at a Pennsylvania map circling the tourist attractions along the highway. Five rested his head on top of yours and you could hear him humming along with the songs on the radio. He was happy and every once in a while when he knew Klaus was busy with the road he'd share a kiss with you just to remind you both of the happiness you had now. As the trees and fields passed, Five looked at you before looking at the world outside the window and said,
"Y'know this actually isn't so terrible."
"See? Told you." Klaus encouraged
"Come to think of it, my whole life I've been under the gun. Missions for Dad, working for the Commission, trying to survive the apocalypse. I was always looking around every corner, just waiting for the other shoe to drop." Five elaborated "It's nice to just breathe."
Tilting your head up to look at him, you place a gentle hand on Five's cheek as you said,
"I'm happy for you darling,"
"I'm happy for us," He replied looking back at you
Turning his head slightly, he placed a kiss on the palm of your hand that had been cupping his face. A wide smile appeared on your own as he did so. Oh, how he loved that smile. He could see it a million times and he'd never get used to how bright it was.
"Good for you, man. Retirement is suiting you." Klaus commented, "And of course, your lovely lady seems happy too."
"I'd hope so. She deserves all the happiness in the world." Five responded cheerfully
"Oh stop." You joked, gently pushing his face with your hand
"Never. I saved the world so I could give every bit of it to you." He stated
Klaus looked in the rearview mirror and could see the way you two were looking at each other. Smiles plastered on your faces and devotion radiating off of you two as you cuddled in the backseat. You were such a happy couple. It was sweet. But you were also an easy-to-embarrass couple and Klaus knew it was going to be a long drive to get to his birth mom. Which is exactly why he had planned to create some entertainment for himself along the way. Keeping a smile on his face Klaus said,
"I'm so happy for you two. I really am, and I just want to say something."
"Yeah?" Five questioned
"I'm so sorry for interrupting your celebrations. Twice." Klaus stated
Hearing his words caused an immediate reaction from you, as you sat up from laying against Five and turned your attention to Klaus. Shock covered your face as you tried to speak but only managed to get out,
"Oh. Klaus."
Five did not want to discuss this with Klaus. It wasn't something he wanted to discuss with any of his siblings but Klaus had a way of weaseling his way into things. Trying to halt the conversation before it occurred Five interjected,
"We don't need to get into this."
"No, no, no. Listen, I get it. When I first started running those bases I didn't want to be interrupted either. Well, up until I realized I had an exhibitionist kink, but that's not the point," Klaus explained "Point is, I'm sorry."
"It's. fine. Klaus." Five stated, emphasizing each word, hoping Klaus would take the hint
"Yeah, there's no need to discuss it." You added
Klaus tried to contain his smirk as he had barely begun and it was already entertaining. You two now both sat perfectly upright with space in between you two. Your cheeks began to tint red as you fiddled with the locket on your necklace and Five averted his gaze from both you and Klaus.
"I totally get it." Klaus asserted
"I don't think you do." Five replied
"You two are new to this. You're young, you're attractive, you're...filled with decades of repression. And those hormones are just churning up a storm and you want to let the rain fall but you don't have the words to say that." Klaus rambled
"Klaus please stop." You requested timidly
"But it's fine babes, I don't judge, I just want you two to live your best lives." Klaus continued "Which is why I got you a little gift when we stopped at that gas station."
"What gift?" Five asked
Five had seen Klaus at the counter before him, but he assumed he was trying to buy cigarettes or something. You and Five both watched as reached into his shirt pocket, pulling something out before tossing it back in Five's direction. The item landed in Five's lap but when he picked it up and saw what it was, He was disappointed but not surprised.
"Klaus..." Five replied blankly "This is a box of condoms."
"It sure is! Got it so you two can be safe!" Klaus exclaimed
The embarrassed tension was practically palpable at this point, but it didn't dissuade Klaus. Honestly, this wasn't just for entertainment, he was helping you two. You both were so reserved when it came to any PDA that wasn't puppy love. You wouldn't even kiss unless you thought he was focused on the road. Come to think of it, he had never seen you two actually kiss on the lips until in the backseat today. Everything was just on the cheek or the hand. For such bold, outspoken people, it seemed like the only time you two managed to actually be intimate was in the heat of the moment when you thought you were alone. It was times like these that the inexperience really shined through and Klaus knew you two just needed that push to be more open about your wants and needs.
"Use 'em in a night, a week, a year, I don't care, but just keep them handy because we already have enough super-powered accidents in this family, we don't need anymore." Klaus elaborated
"Okay, Klaus. We get it." You stated, your voice almost sing-songy from nervousness
"And especially after this whole fiasco with what's his name?... Stan, I think. I don't know what's wrong with him-" Klaus babbled
"His parents are Diego and Lila. I think that answers the question." Five remarked
"-but for having two parents with powers he seems to have none." Klaus mentioned, "But still, we don't need a child that can manipulate time, space, matter, existence itself really, running around. So if you're gonna do it wrap it up."
"Thanks, Klaus..." Five sighed as he resigned to putting the box in his pocket
It was times like these that Five wished his brother had a mute button. He just wanted to have a nice road trip but Klaus just had to be his overly open, free-loving self and make things awkward. Perhaps, in Klaus' mind, he was genuinely trying to make up for his interruptions but it wasn't actually helpful.
"No problem! And hey if you want to get it on in the backseat that's fine. There's a blanket in the trunk, you just gotta let me know to turn the music up and tilt the rearview mirror away." Klaus declared
And with that comment, you had enough. You knew that this was just the way Klaus was but your skin felt like it was on fire and your eyes began to strain from looking away from anyone's gaze. Trying to get past this quickly, you managed to glance over at Five as you whisper-yelled at him,
"Change the subject. For the love of god, change the subject."
It took Five a few seconds to switch from thinking about what Klaus had said to what you were saying, but once it had been processed he immediately jumped on the task. Bringing out the map again, Five opened it and mentioned,
"Oh! Uh... All right! Hey so, we've circled all the roadside attractions along the way."
"You circled the World's Largest Ball of Twine right?" You chimed in, forcing the conversation in the new direction
"Sure did!" Five exclaimed
Klaus' amused smirk went away as he realized this was not good. He hadn't broken the news yet that this wasn't really just a road trip to the countryside. Trying to set the record straight Klaus interjected,
"I'm not sure we're gonna have time..."
"We also have the Brownsville Big Nickel." Five suggested, "Oh, Ricky's Bakery has award-winning pies."
"I read that they have this thing called the Pie Flight where they give you a perfect one-bite portion of each pie." You mentioned, "We have to try that."
"If you just let me explain..." Klaus attempted to speak once more
"Or there's this Cow Henge." Five stated, pointing at the spot circled on the map
"I went to Cow Henge when my field trip bus broke down. The gift shop is so cool. Everything is cow and dairy-themed. Not to mention that it is HUGE." You recalled, "We lost three kids in the place and it took about 45 minutes to find them all."
"Thank god we brought all that cash for souvenirs," Five remarked
"I know right!" You cheered
Klaus couldn't take this anymore. This road trip was for him to find his mom not to just lounge about looking at tourist traps along the highway. Needing to get his point across Klaus looked in the rearview mirror at the two of you as he firmly said,
"Hey, guys can you just shut up for two seconds, okay? Just two seconds? All right?"
You and Five both looked up from the map you were peering over and met Klaus's eyes in the mirror. Was he okay?
"Okay, I'm all ears." Five replied
"What is it, Klaus?" You asked
"So, actually, we are going to Pennsylvania...to find my birth mother. Yay!" Klaus exclaimed
The excitement you and Five had felt about the stops you had planned washed away as you realized Klaus had tricked you into coming on this trip. Your face fell into shock and disbelief as Five's expression morphed into one of anger.
"Excuse me?" You questioned
"What!" Five shouted
"I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry." Klaus apologized meekly "I just needed somebody to come with me for emotional support."
"Oh, emotional support, like a Schnauzer?" Five snapped back
"I knew you wouldn't come if I told you, so what was I supposed to do?" Klaus defended
This was fucking ridiculous. Five trusted Klaus. He trusted that Klaus just wanted to go out and get away from everything for a bit. He trusted that this trip would be nice and a good way to spend time with his brother and you. He trusted that Klaus had no other motives for doing this because his siblings ALWAYS had their motives for doing things. Five felt like an idiot. When had any of his siblings done anything outside of their own interests? It was always about them and this time was no exception, but unfortunately, you had been drawn into this bullshit too. All he wanted was to relax with you and he couldn't even do that. Five's blood boiled at the betrayal and his emotions ran high as he raged,
"You're goddamn right I wouldn't have come, Klaus. You know why? Because I am supposed to be retired! I am supposed to be celebrating that retirement AND anniversaries with my girlfriend!"
You frowned realizing that the trip wasn't how you expected it to be. Instead of a nice time for you two to enjoy the world around you, it was just about Klaus doing something for himself and lying to bring you two along. So much for all that fluff he was spouting about it being a mini honeymoon and all.
"Klaus," You whined disappointed "We came to take our mind off of things, not look for a woman you've never met before."
"Yeah, I know..." Klaus trailed off
"This was supposed to be a carefree road trip!" Five ridiculed
"Well, it still can be, babes." Klaus reassured
Slouching back in your seat, the car continued on its path forward. And as it did you saw the upcoming sign for the World's Largest Ball of Twine ahead, bold orange letters underneath it reading NEXT LEFT.
"Aw man, we're gonna miss the Ball of Twine." You sighed
Hearing what you had said, Five looked out the window catching the sight of the sign before it passed. You were not missing the Ball of Twine. It was the first thing he circled, it was the best stop and you were both excited about it. Blinking into the front seat next to Klaus, Five grabbed onto the steering wheel as he exclaimed,
"Klaus, turn! Ball of Twine! Turn!"
Klaus gripped the wheel trying to regain control from Five who was acting like a madman over a glorified ball of yarn.
"What? Five! Five!" Klaus called out
"It is one of the best ones! Come on!" Five shouted
Quickly you put on a seatbelt in the backseat, which up until now you had disregarded because you wanted to cuddle, and held onto one of the car handles above as the vehicle swung back and forth between Klaus and Five's tug of war on the wheel.
"Five, we're gonna die!" Klaus exclaimed
The car swerved back and forth on the road and although it was concerning you weren't really worried about you or Five dying in an accident. You could let the wreckage pass through you or make yourself dense enough that you wouldn't get hurt and Five could blink away. It really was just Klaus dying that you worried about because his powers didn't protect him from death. You wanted to say something but didn't know what and so you kept your mouth shut.
"I don't care!" Five screamed
As the intersection to make the left came up, Five pulled harshly on the wheel jerking it to the left and causing the car to almost collide with another. With Klaus pulling the wheel back you managed to avoid a head-on collision and were now on the road toward the Ball of Twine.
"Let go!" Klaus begged
"You know what? No twine, no birth mother!" Five yelled
"Alright, alright. If you let go, we'll go!" Klaus stated
Hearing his brother relent to seeing the twine ball, Five let go of the wheel letting Klaus regain full control.
"Oh thank god." Klaus sighed relieved
"Ball of Twine it is." Five said as he patted Klaus on the shoulder
Klaus looked at Five nervously before seeing a flash of blue and Five reappearing in the back seat next to you. You gave Five a nervous grin as you began to relax after that fiasco, and after a few minutes, you finally arrived at your destination. Stepping out of the car, you and Five walked down a dirt path toward the giant ball. The ball stood tall, sitting at the edge of a grassy plain that stretched for miles. A nice spring breeze blew past you rustling the grass as the sound of birds chirping in the distance filled the air. This was peaceful. Standing at the base you and Five looked up at the ball as it towered over you.
"I wonder if it's actually all twine or if it's just empty on the inside." You mused
Five's head tilted to the side slightly as he mulled over your statement. What an interesting mind you had. He never thought about the fact that it might just be a tourist trap. Well, whether they were lying or not it was still a tourist trap, but it would be a really big ruse for something people made no money on. Now you had him wondering if it was empty inside too.
"I...I don't know." Five replied continuing to think about it
You weren't just going to stand and ponder about an answer though when you knew for a fact you could find out right then and there.
"I will." You stated cheerfully "One second."
Five looked at you confused before watching you step forward and into the ball of twine itself. That's right. You could do that. You could go through things. Five stood there as he waited for you to come back and after a moment you walked out of the ball and announced,
"It's all twine."
Well, there was that question answered. You truly were looking at the World's Largest Ball of Twine.
"Glad they're not lying." Five remarked
"I cut us a piece from the heart of the ball." You said holding up a strand of twine
"Oh, why?" Five questioned
"Because our hearts are inter-TWINEd!" You exclaimed before adding "It took me a good 20 seconds to come up with that pun so I hope you appreciate it."
Five rolled his eyes. The pun was dumb, but it was still a sweet sentiment, and you seemed to be proud of yourself so he would let it slide. Anyway, he'd take a cheesy joke from you over most other things.
"Sure," Five chuckled "I appreciate it."
"Oh, we should take a picture!" You suggested excitedly "Hold onto the twine since I don't have pockets. I'll go get the camera."
Placing the twine into Five's hand you scurried off back to the car to get the camera you had brought. As you made your way towards the car though, Klaus had finally started approaching the ball. Looking around at the emptiness around him, he swayed side to side impatiently. He wanted to find his birth mother. They couldn't just stand here looking at this middle-of-nowhere attraction for too long. There was a task at hand! Trying to speed up the process Klaus commented,
"Y'know, I don't know why, but I thought it'd be a lot bigger."
"Seems pretty big to me." Five replied before asking "Here's the real question. How do you know your birth mother is in Pennsylvania?"
"Well, because I was on the ass end of a two-week bender, and I can't tell you the exact date because we were boofing Xanax and the whole business, but Amy Winehouse was at the top of the charts. So that puts us somewhere, where? In the mid to late aughts?" Klaus reminisced as he walked to stand beside his brother "I helped myself into Dad's office, looking for the key to his safe 'cause he had Pogo lock up all the stealables. But instead, I found a treasure trove of our family history told in expired check stubs."
Although he had been under the influence of many things, Klaus still remembered that day vividly. The emotion of finding out who his mother could've been stuck with him for a very long time.
"I was too messed up to, uh, do anything about it, too scared to look her up. But always in the back of my mind, I wondered why she sold me off for three grand. I mean, come on, she couldn't have held out for five? Six?" Klaus added
Although this plan seemed somewhat absurd, Five could understand where Klaus was coming from. He too had wondered many times who his mother was and why she sold him away. What his life would've been like if he was never adopted and who he would've become instead. He assumed that all of his siblings had wondered the same thing at some point. Even the more disillusioned ones at the time like Luther and Diego. Curious, Five asked,
"You see anything about my mother?"
"No. Sorry." Klaus apologized
"Why now?" Five questioned
"Well, duh. Dad disowns us. Grace isn't Grace. Ben's... gone." Klaus explained, "Now just felt like a good time as any to find out who I could've been if I didn't grow up in this stupid family."
Family. Family. Family. That word was thrown around so much that Five wasn't even sure if he truly knew the definition of it at this point. The people whom he had surrounded himself with he called his family, but were they one?
"Can you really call what we had a family?" Five asked
"No. It's more like a-" Klaus started
"-Institute for Snarky Delinquents." Five remarked
Klaus and Five both looked up at the ball of twine as they began to laugh at Five's remark. The Hargreeves siblings to this day were still snarky delinquents, and yet they couldn't even get that right.
"And not a good one at that." Five added sarcastically
"But what is family? What is it?" Klaus questioned, "It's like some kind of...giant ball of twine that can never be untangled."
"A giant ball of obligation I've been pushing uphill my entire life." Five stated
"And the older you get, the bigger it gets. And the more you try and untangle it..." Klaus mentioned
"You watch it roll down the hill..." Five continued
"And what's the point?" The two brothers said simultaneously
"Hey, I'm glad you came along. You're a good brother." Klaus thanked
Five paused, his eyes blinking in confusion, as he looked at his brother. He didn't know how to respond. None of his siblings had ever expressed much of anything positive toward him since his return. It was always complaints or criticisms, so this was different.
Klaus wasn't sure how Five would take the compliment from him so before he could truly respond, Klaus broke the silence and quickly suggested,
"Alright, alright. You say nice things about me now."
Trying his best, Five came up with the first thing he could think of to say and stated,
"Let's find your stupid mother."
"Love you too, tiny dancer!" Klaus exclaimed as he turned around beginning to head back toward the car
"Uh-uh, no running off yet Klaus." You said as you put one hand on his chest stopping him "You wanna see your birth mother, you gotta play photographer for us."
"But-" Klaus began to say
"Photos or I trap you inside the twine." You threatened
Klaus looked at you shocked for a moment before taking the camera from your hand and replying,
"Yes ma'am."
Smiling at Klaus, you quickly made your way over to Five and grabbed his hand pulling him a bit closer to the ball of twine. As you excitedly led him, you looked back at him for a moment with a wide smile on your face. Every time Five saw you smile the world just seemed a little bit brighter. And as the corners of his lips tilted upward, a look of love filled his eyes. When you two were together you were in a world of your own and anyone with eyes could see that. Klaus included. Which is why he quickly snapped a candid of the sweet moment before it could go away. Even if this trip was to find his mom, you and Five still deserved to have something to look back on fondly. And as you two were finally close enough to the ball, you stood side by side and looked at Klaus.
"Alright, c'mon get close. Act like you love each other." Klaus remarked playfully "I want this photo to look like it belongs in a David's Bridal catalog."
You laughed at Klaus' comment but he was right. You shouldn't just be standing side by side you should be close. Turning to face Five, you wrapped your arms around his neck as he wrapped his around your waist. Pulling his face down toward you, the tip of your nose touched his as you looked into his eyes and smiled. Five smiled back as he held you and a moment later the sound of the camera processing the polaroid could be heard. Still holding on to each other you looked at Klaus for confirmation of the picture and could see as he placed the photo into his shirt pocket.
"One more!" Klaus proclaimed "You can't be that close and not kiss."
Five turned his head to look back at you again to see if you wanted to do so, but his eyes had barely locked on yours when you pulled him down into a kiss. It caught him off guard but he wasn't against it in the slightest. The two of you melted into it, happily enjoying the closeness of each other's presence only to be interrupted when Klaus teased,
"Alright, that's enough. I got the photo."
Pulling apart the two of you laughed to yourself as you saw Klaus standing there waiting for you to be done. You could see the amusement on his face at the two of you, but you knew it was time to go. Klaus had done what you asked and it was time to get back on the road.
"Head to the car. We'll meet you there." Five replied
You watched as Klaus rushed off to the car while you and Five lingered behind. Letting each other go, you took each other's hands, and as you walked slowly toward the car you mentioned,
"He's right, y'know. You are a good brother."
"You heard that?" Five questioned
"I did and don't worry the rest will come around too. Just give it time." You reassured, "Now let's go find Klaus' mom so we can get back to an actual trip."
You knew him so well. Always saying exactly what he needed to hear when he needed to hear it. It was just another reason to love you. Making it to the car, you both climbed into the back seat and snuggled up again as Klaus pulled away from the ball of twine and back onto the road. Reaching into his shirt pocket, he pulled out the photos he took and handed them back for you and Five to look at.
"Here ya go," Klaus said, his eyes still on the road
Taking the polaroids, you shuffled through them, happily showing Five each one. They were cute, and although this trip wasn't going fully according to plan it would be okay. Five took the photos from you placing them into one of the many pockets on his vest to keep them safe as Klaus returned to the highway and made his way toward Lancaster. The drive continued for about an hour but it didn't feel like much time had passed as you leaned against Five listening to him quietly sing along to the songs on the radio, just loud enough for only you to hear. Finally, the car turned down a gravel road, passing an open pasture filled with cows before making its way to the opening of a small village. As you stepped out of the car and looked around, Five stated surprised,
"Son of a bitch! Klaus is Amish."
"This explains everything!" Klaus exclaimed
"How does this explain anything?" Five questioned
"Because look! Look at this place! This is everything my childhood was missing." Klaus explained gesturing at the surroundings
"It is...?" You asked unsurely
You truly tried not to be judgmental about the people you cared about but you were pretty sure that this isn't what Klaus needed. Maybe the rigid structure of life would help, but it didn't work out the first time so who knew if it would've helped him here. And if you recalled correctly, the Amish were very religious and who knows how he would've been treated. Maybe it could've gone well but it was more likely he'd be viewed as a devil's child and ostracized for communing with the dead.
You thought about your own childhood. Your parents had made you hide your powers outside the house in fear of something bad happening if anyone found out. They were a bit right about that in retrospect, but at the time it shut you off from people. You didn't have friends and didn't really speak to anyone unless you had to because you didn't want to slip up and mention your abilities. Your quietness and avoidance othered you to your peers and you too became ostracized. Even if it was never intentional. It made you wonder, would any environment have been good for those of you with powers? Because compared to the Hargreeves you had what could constitute a "good life" and yet you were still alone. If you were powerless would things be better?
As you contemplated the complexities of your lives, Five recalled that there was a chance Klaus' doppelgänger could be here. And if that was the case things could go wrong very quickly.
"Hey, Klaus?" He called rushing after him "Wait up a minute."
Klaus paused allowing Five to catch up. Grabbing onto Klaus' wrist Five felt for his pulse to see if it had risen. Looking over him Five searched for any signs of paradox psychosis as he asked,
"Doppelgänger check. You feel anything strange? Uh, itching, sweats, gas, anything like that?"
"No. No, I feel great. Apart from the old rash on the tackle, but what can you do?" Klaus responded
From behind Klaus, you grimaced at his comment and you could see as Five's face mimicked the same expression. But before either of you could comment, Klaus moved past Five and began to walk towards the town. Stepping to be by your side, Five encouraged,
"All right, good luck."
"What? Wait, you're not coming?" Klaus asked turning to look at Five
"This one you gotta do alone." Five replied
"Alone? Yeah, okay." Klaus said nervously "Yeah, I can do that, sure."
Hesitantly, Klaus turned around and began to walk into the Amish town to try and find his mother.
"We'll be parked by the cow pasture." Five called out
You could see as Klaus nodded but he didn't look back. You stood there for a bit and watched him until he was far enough that you knew he wouldn't chicken out and turn around. With that confirmation, you both turned back towards the car, climbed in, and drove back down the dirt path to park next to the cow pasture. The road to get back there wasn't too far but the gravel did make it that you drove slower. As Five continued to drive the car forward he had his left hand on the wheel and the other resting on his leg. Looking out your peripheral at his hand, there was a thought in your mind that you had wanted to do for a while. Reaching your left hand over you grabbed the wrist of the hand resting on his leg, lifting it up and bringing it over toward you. As you did so Five opened his hand and began to ask,
"Do you want to hol-"
But before he could finish his statement you had placed his open hand down on your thigh. Five hadn't anticipated this being the outcome of you grabbing at his hand but he wasn't against it. He didn't say anything and instead responded by holding on a little tighter and gently brushing his thumb back and forth. He still tried to keep his eyes on the road but from his peripheral, he could see your pleased little smile. Five loved these tiny moments with you. They made him feel...normal. And that was something he had not felt in a very long time.
No words were exchanged, but the hype you had heard about being a passenger princess was very real and you hoped there would be more opportunities like this in the future. As you arrived at the spot by the pasture you saw dozens of cows scattered about an open field, either lounging in the grass or grazing on it. Quietly, you and Five got out of the car and looked around. This place was quaint and calm, completely unaffected by the hustle and bustle of the life you both knew.
As you heard the sounds of the cows mooing in the pasture and birds chirping from up in the trees, you walked to the front of the car, cooled down the metal of the hood, and sat atop it. The light country breeze swept past you making your hair gently float in the wind and the rays of the sun warmed your skin as you took in what nature had to offer you. You could hear the radio playing from behind you in the car, and then there was a recognizable clicking sound that came from off to the side of you. Looking in the direction of the sound you saw Five standing there with the camera in his hand, a new photo obviously coming out of it. A smirk came to your face as you questioned amused,
"What're you doing?"
"Making memories." He replied before taking another photo
"Well don't waste all the film on me," You remarked "Take a picture of the cows."
Lowering the camera for a moment Five walked toward the car and stood in front of you. He couldn't help taking photos of you. For most of his life, he only had one and throughout those years he would've done anything to have more. He even had dug through the scraps of the academy searching to see if he could find any other photos of you amidst the rubble and ash.
He never did.
But that wasn't a story for now. Today was a good day and he was going to make sure that you both could remember it far into the future.
"No." He stated lifting up the camera again "I don't quite care to remember the cows."
"Stop!" You playfully shrieked as you brought a hand up to hide your face
You didn't do a good job of it though. Your hand may have covered your eyes in the photo but it did nothing to cover your smile. Although he wasn't in the frame, Five was smiling on the other side of the camera and as the polaroid popped out of the camera, Five relented,
"Fine, that's the last one."
"Good." You laughed as your lowered your hand
"For now." He added
Five walked off to the side of the car and placed the camera, his vest, and hat in the backseat. Grabbing a pair of yellow sunglasses he had found, he walked back to the front of the car and sat next to you on the hood.
"I like the glasses." You complimented
"Thanks," Five replied
Looking off into the distance you stared at the open fields of grass and wheat and quietly hummed to yourself.
"What are you thinking about?" Five asked curiously
"You think Klaus is gonna run into his doppel?" You questioned looking at him
"I hope not, but he seemed to be safe when I checked." Five answered
"I wonder where our doppelgängers are." You mused
"Shouldn't you be in the city?" Five inquired
"Have you seen me experience psychosis?" You mentioned
Come to think of it, he hadn't. If your doppelgänger was in the city you definitely would've already hit the homicidal rage phase. But if you weren't in your house in the city, where were you? It's not like you were adopted like him and brought here. You were born here.
"No." He replied flatly before asking "Where would you be then?"
"I don't know, but we moved somewhere." You responded
"How do you know?" Five followed up
"My bedroom was completely empty rather than frozen in time. That means wherever my parents went they took me too."
"Why would you move?"
You didn't have many explanations for why you weren't around but you did have one idea that made sense.
"Maybe a curious 12-year-old decided to cross the street to the house she wasn't supposed to go to, got scared by something, and had it reinforced that her parents were right and that place was dangerous prompting them to move her out of fear." you explained, "That's my guess."
Five sat quietly as he thought about your answer. If things had gone wrong that day you met him, if he had done something that might've scared you, he probably would've never seen you again. The fact that you weren't scared, that you stayed, that he changed your mind at least somewhat about the academy was the whole reason you were here by his side. Curious, Five inquired,
"Hey...when we met, why did you stay?"
You remembered that day you met. It all happened so fast but every detail was clear as day. The sandwich you attempted to steal, the way you were pushed over the bench, how you knocked into him when you tried to run away, but most importantly you remembered how he reached out to you to help you stand back up. How that one gesture made you feel safe to be around him and changed the course of your life.
"When I fell to the ground after knocking into you, you reached your hand out to me to help me up." You explained softly "If you were dangerous, why would you help me?"
Five smiled as he took your hand in his, just as he did that first day. It made him feel luckier to know that what he did that day made you want to stay around him.
As you looked into your boyfriend's eyes you reminisced more about your first meeting and recalled another reason why you stayed.
"Oh!" You exclaimed before adding "Also you were very strange in our first interaction and I needed to know more."
With your second statement, Five felt slightly less sentimental knowing that you partially stuck around because you thought he was weird. But you did end up loving him in the end so he couldn't complain too much.
"Oh thanks, darling." Five replied sarcastically
"No problem! But hey, if my doppel isn't here though..." You suggested, "Then maybe they're with yours."
"Given how many people are on the planet and how we could be anywhere, the likelihood of that is pretty low." He commented factually
"Yeah well so is the likelihood of fighting two apocalypses and we did that." You retorted "Is it crazy to assume we could be together here too?"
No. It wasn't crazy to assume so. Honestly the likelihood of your doppelgängers being together, although low was still as probably higher than the fact that you fought two apocalypses.
"No, you're right." Five relented "So what do you think happened with them?"
"Well, I'm thinking that my family moved to your town. We started going to school together and discovered we both had powers. We bonded over that and became friends" You explained excitedly "and then obviously you fell in love with me."
"Obviously," Five remarked
"And of course, I fell in love with you too. We start dating, zoom through college, and get doctorates becoming premier scholars in academia furthering the reach of science, and inspiring future generations." You continued
"So we're professors?" He clarified
"Yes. And we're super successful. Highly renowned!" You exclaimed "And then we get married and have a dog and also a kid. Or two."
Five had been amused by your whole tale of the life your doppelgängers were living, but when you mentioned them being married with kids he paused. Did you want to get married to him? If you wanted that for them, then that meant you wanted it for you and him too, right? Your doppels were just different versions of you so that had to mean you wanted the same. At least he hoped so. Five had been dancing around the topic but if he ever wanted an answer he needed to ask. Five looked away for a moment preparing himself to ask, but when he looked back he saw that your face had gone pale and there was fear in your eyes as you stared off into the distance.
"(Y/N)?" He called confused
But as you watched a wall of energy quickly approach all you could say was a quiet,
"oh no..."
And just like that, it hit again. Immediately you curled over yourself as you let out a yelp of pain. You bit at your bottom lip hard preventing any further screams from escaping but the energy running through you felt like someone slowly twisting a knife into your sides. It hurt like a bitch. You dug your nails into your sides through the fabric trying to feel something other than the seething pain but it was minimally successful at best.
Five looked over you concerned. One minute you were fine and the next you hunched over trying to prevent yourself from crying out. Five looked around for something, anything that might be causing your pain to such an extreme degree but there was nothing there. He had to help you though. He couldn't let you suffer like this.
"Baby what's wrong?" He questioned frantically, the panic evident in his voice "What's going on?"
You didn't reply though as you couldn't hear him over the sound of your heartbeat in your head. It pounded like a drum as pulses of energy flooded through you, growing once more. The wall of energy pounded through you again causing you to wretch and let out the cry that you were holding back, but soon after the pain stopped and the energy faded away. Slowly, you sat back up straight catching your breath.
"What happened? Are you okay?" Five questioned as he looked you over
"I felt an energy wave. I'm not sure what's causing it, but it's happened before." You answered between breaths "I'm fine now though."
"What? This has happened before?" Five inquired, obviously distressed
"This is the third energy wave I've felt. The first was last night, the second was this morning at breakfast." You stated
"Why didn't you tell me?" He pressed
"I thought I was overreacting." You responded sincerely "I didn't want you to worry."
"Well, now I'm worried!" He exclaimed
You looked away slightly ashamed that you hadn't informed him sooner, but you were telling the truth. You thought it was an overreaction and didn't want to worry him. As you looked off to the side though, your eyes grew wide as you saw a concerning sight.
"Babe, I think we have bigger problems than me right now." You said flatly
"There's nothing more important than you." Five stated firmly
Leaning back so he could see what you saw too, you raised your hand to point toward what was once a field full of cows now completely empty.
"Where are the cows then?" You questioned
Five's panic over you turned into a larger concern as he saw the field of cows now devoid of them. Shit.
"Can't we get one fucking day off?" Five complained
"Guess not." You replied annoyed "Grab a marker, we've got some numbers to crunch."
Going to the backseat of the car, Five grabbed the markers you had used to circle attractions. on the map. Attractions that you knew you would no longer be going to. Why couldn't the universe just give you one day to be happy together? Why was it always stolen moments and brief breaks? neither of you knew, but you couldn't dwell on it. Each taking a marker, you rolled up the windows of the car and began writing out equations to try and figure out what was going on.
As you two were working through and discussing the numbers though Klaus began to emerge through the trees, running toward the car like his life depended on it. Which it slightly did.
"I think you should carry this four over." You suggested
"But that would mess up the margin of error we found." Five replied
"Five! (Y/N)! Start the car!" Klaus shouted from across the field
Neither of you heard him though as you continued saying,
"Yeah but that's only because you used this equation to calculate it. I don't think it's the right one."
"It's the only one that makes sense." Five remarked
"But you're not factoring in energy, that opens the door for other formulas." You stated
"START! THE! CAR!" Klaus yelled one more
Finally hearing him call, you both looked towards the field as you watched Klaus run through it toward the car while being chased by a mob of angry Amish men.
"Oh shit." You blurted
"What the hell did he do?" Five questioned annoyed
"Oh shit, shit, shit! Start the car! Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry!" Klaus exclaimed as he approached
Opening the passenger door, Five let you into the car before heading over to the other side and getting in the driver's seat.
"Why can't you just get along with people?" Five complained
"I tried. Really, I did!" Klaus retorted
Klaus made his way to get into the backseat but before he could do so an Amish woman came running toward him shouting,
"Wait, wait, wait!
"Hold on a second!" Klaus said to you two as he ran over to her
You watched as the woman talked to him frantically. You couldn't hear what she was saying but you did see as she shoved some kind of book into his hands. At that same time, you could see the mob of angry men getting closer and closer. If Klaus didn't get in the car soon you'd have to do a lot of vehicular manslaughters to get out of this one.
"Klaus get in the car!" Five shouted, "It's now or never!"
As Five started the car, you saw the woman turn Klaus around and he made his way to the backseat. Quickly hopping in the back, Five sped off before the mob of men got to the car, leaving them all behind in the dust. As Five continued speeding down the dirt road checking the rearview mirror to see if you were being followed, Klaus leaned forward from the back with his new book open in hand.
"This whole timeline's chock-full of riddles." Klaus announced "Get this. My mom died here before I was even born!"
Immediately hearing those words Five slammed on the break causing the car to jolt to a stop. Aggressively he gripped the steering wheel as he glared back at Klaus, his eyes wide and filled with frustrated anger as he exclaimed,
"What did you just say?"
"I said mom died before I was even born," Klaus repeated
You and Five looked at Klaus before looking at each other. While Five had practical experience with time, you had theoretical knowledge, but both of you knew what that statement meant.
"Grandfather paradox." You synchronously stated
"Grandfather what?" Klaus asked
"But how?" Five questioned frustrated
There was no time for questions though as from the rearview mirror you could see what looked like a horse and buggy trailing up the road.
"No time!" You blurted frantically "You drive, I'll read. Klaus give me that book."
As Five hit the gas once more, Klaus handed over the book he had gotten to you. You flipped through the pages one by one reading through the scrapbooked newspaper clippings and public access medical. The pages were filled with content about dozen of women who had died under mysterious circumstances. You consumed the information trying to extrapolate all the important data you could but when you turned the page again you froze. There at the top of the page were images of two people who you knew very well.
"Mom? Dad?" You whispered
But as your eyes trailed down the newspaper clipping the words that you read sent a chill through your very soul.
Medical Mystery Causes Fatal Car Crash, 2 Dead
October 1st, 1989
Earlier today two individuals died in a car crash on Irvington Avenue in South Orange near Seaton Hall University caused by an unknown medical condition. The two individuals have been identified as (M/N), 19 and (F/N), 20.
When emergency services arrived on the scene both individuals were pronounced dead.
According to the preliminary coroner's report (M/LN) suffered a possible aneurysm at approximately 11:47 AM causing her to lose control of her vehicle and swerve into oncoming traffic. While the report currently states an aneurysm as cause of death, the coroner has stated that they are still looking into the cause.
"This death is unfortunate but also highly unusual. While we have currently ruled it as an aneurysm we are still looking into what may have happened. We have never seen a case such as this before, especially in what seems like a completely healthy individual," said Leon Dawson, Coroner for Essex County
While (M/LN)'s cause of death is still up in the air, (F/LN) died from injuries sustained from the crash according to the coroner's report.
(M/LN) and (F/LN) were both involved in their local college community. (M/LN) was described by professors as highly intelligent and one of the brightest students in her courses. She was also an active member of the college dance team and teammates said she was incredibly helpful, a beacon of positivity, and highly ambitious. She was an Architecture and Art, Design, and Interactive Multimedia double major who hoped to become an architect and interior designer post-graduation.
(F/LN) was described by his friends as kind, charismatic, and genuine. Fiercely protective of those he loved, he always knew how to make those around him happy and was consistently there to give insightful advice. He was known for his love of music, his leadership abilities, and his philanthropy work. He was an Engineering major who dreamed of starting his own structural engineering firm after graduation. He was also the president of the Phi Kappa Theta Honorary Service Fraternity at the college.
We will continue to report more as this story develops.
You read the words over and over again as you looked at the pictures of your young parents. They were happy and full of life in their individual photos. This couldn't be right! Your parents didn't get in an accident the day you were born, they ALMOST got in one. They didn't die. No. The newspaper was wrong! It had to be wrong!
"No. No. That's not how the story goes!" You yelled, "That's not how it happened!"
Five could hear the hurt in your voice as you yelled. Knowing that he had put a sizable distance between the car and the Amish village he pulled off to the side of the road so that he could focus on you.
"Baby what's wrong?" He questioned
"The newspaper!" You yelled shoving the book away from you and into his hands
As Five looked down at the open page in the book his heart sank. He recognized those faces, they were younger than he last recalled but he knew them well. Those were your parents. Five quickly scanned the article and with every word the sinking feeling within him got worse and worse. They were both dead.
"That's not how it happened!" you shouted "My parents told me how they met! My mom swerved into oncoming traffic and almost hit my dad's car. But she didn't and they both pulled over. My dad was going to scold her but instead helped her give birth to me."
Although you refused to acknowledge them, streams of tears rolled down your face. Your throat felt like it was closing on you as you tried and failed to choke back your cries. Your brain felt like it was in overdrive as it swam with thoughts. Your heart raced. Maybe if you denied it still, it would change. It wouldn't be real. It couldn't be real.
"Th-that's how they got together. My parents came together because of m-me." You stuttered "They didn't die. They couldn't have. They- they couldn't..."
You looked at Five for some type of reassurance. Some glimmer that your mind was playing tricks on you and it was wrong. But all he could do was give you a sad look and quietly apologize,
"Love, I'm sorry..."
Before he could continue though you broke down into loud sobs. They were...dead. They were dead just like everyone else was dead. Eudora. Old Ben. Grace. Charlie. And now your parents. The list kept growing.
Five leaned across the center console and pulled you into his arms. Grabbing the fabric of his flannel tightly, you buried your face into his chest, collecting tears on his shirt and doing nothing to muffle the sound of your cries. With one hand Five, gently stroked your hair as he held you with the other, and Klaus ran a hand up and down your back.
Five and Klaus looked at each other. Neither of them had known their moms and their dad was an asshole. Grace was alright but in reality, they never truly knew the love of a parent. But it must be a powerful thing because they felt like hell hearing you cry.
"I'm gonna figure this out for you." Five tried to comfort "I'm going to try and fix it."
You pulled back from Five and looked into his eyes. Your sobs had lessened into weeps and the tears rolled a bit quieter but the pain and hurt were still there. You wanted to escape the feeling in the car and be alone but you knew you couldn't. If you couldn't be alone perhaps you could tune out the world for a bit of time.
"Can I have the newspaper piece..." You asked quietly
"I don't think that's a good-" Five began to reply
"I just want to look at them..." You whispered
He didn't want to give it to you in fear that it would hurt you more, but he could understand the desire to look at them. Those two photos were all you had of them and he knew that feeling well from his own experience. Letting out a sigh, Five relented,
"Okay."
Pulling the clipping out of the book he handed it over to you as you gently took it in your hands and stared down at it in silence. Nobody said anything more, and after one last glance at you, Five began to drive back to the hotel.
By the time you arrived, it was already night, and in more ways than one, light had turned to dark. Quickly, Five and Klaus got ready to head inside but you were still in a haze. A few hours had passed since you first read the article in your hands and yet you hadn't noticed it go by. It was like the world around you was speeding by but you were frozen in time. Stuck in a trance-like state you didn't recall the world around you until Five asked,
"You coming darling?"
"Oh uh yeah." You responded coming back to reality "I'll meet you there."
Five didn't want to leave you, but if he was going to fix things for you then he needed to get started right away. Gently taking your hand Five lifted it towards his lips and placed a kiss on top of it. It wasn't much, but he hoped it could help a bit. Opening the car door, Five said,
"I'll see you soon,"
And with that, he stepped out of the car, grabbed Klaus' book, and went inside with him. Seeing his siblings over by the bar he rushed over to them and tried to gather their attention.
"Okay, gather round, people." Five announced before asking "Where is-- Where's every-- Where's Luther?"
"Haven't seen him," Allison responded
"Who knows?" Diego commented
"Anybody know where--" Five began to ask before realizing it was useless "Okay, you know what? We got bigger problems to worry about right now."
"Like what?" Allison scoffed, taking a sip of her drink
Five shot Allison an annoyed look. This was serious. Opening up the book Klaus received, Five plopped it down on the bar.
"This." Five said as he flipped through the pages of the book
"Who are they?" Viktor asked
"These are our mothers." Five stated
Flipping through once more, the page landed on another one of the women causing Klaus to lean in and point as he said,
"That one's mine."
"They're all dead." Five elaborated "They all died on the exact same day, October 1st, 1989."
"That's our birthday." Viktor stated
"Not anymore, it isn't." Five retorted "They all died before we were born."
Diego looked down at the book and the pages filled with clipped newspapers. Five was so stupid. They had to be born to exist so how could their mothers have died before they were born?
"That's dumb." Diego pointed out "If we weren't born, how can we exist?"
Five crossed his arms over his chest as he stared Diego down. How was he related to to this guy?How could he be so stupid so confidently? Annoyance coursed through his system as he grew more tired of answering what should be obvious with just a little bit of forethought.
"Exactly." Five replied flatly
"What are you saying?" Viktor questioned
"I'm saying, when we jumped here, we created a time paradox. All right? Not just any paradox. This is the grandfather paradox." Five explained carefully
"What the hell is a grandfather paradox?" Klaus asked confused
Five took a deep breath knowing he was going to have to explain it to them as if they were babies. Why couldn't they all be like you and just....know. The situation was what it was though and so he began to lay out the pieces to them. As Five explained what a grandfather paradox is to his clueless siblings, you finally stumbled into the hotel. Seeing the rest of the group over at the bar, you slowly made your way over. Your expression was still blank and you had a 40-yard-stare. Getting to the bar you didn't approach the group though, instead you stood a few feet over and reached over the bar grabbing the first bottle you could see before taking a giant swig of it. It burned as it went down, but you didn't even flinch.
As Klaus and Five looked at you sadly, Diego and Viktor looked on with concern. This was not the (Y/N) who was happily spending time with her boyfriend. This wasn't even the combative one who fought with Diego this morning. This (Y/N) was empty. Significantly empty. Hitting Five's arm to force his attention, Diego interrogated,
"What did you do to her?"
"Nothing." Five firmly stated "I know it's hard to get through your thick skull, but unlike you, my girlfriend and I don't try to hurt each other."
"What's wrong with her then?" Allison questioned, the judgement in her tone clear as day
Five glared at Allison. He knew that she was hurting and maybe she was acting this way because she was drunk, but that gave her no right to be so rude and apathetic. Especially towards you. She wasn't the only one in pain here and honestly knowing four people you love died seemed a lot more valid of a reason to be hurt than one person who just didn't exist. It was sad, yes, but Claire wasn't dead. She just wasn't around.
The rest of the group looked to Five for an explanation into your behavior and after a moment he leaned in, dropped his voice low and sadly explained,
"She's found out four people she loved have died in less than 24 hours. Grace from the 60s, Charlie, and now both of her parents."
"I thought only our mothers are dead?" Viktor asked
"Her mom was driving a car, and whoever killed her caused her to swerve which crashed into her dad's." Five quietly explained "Her birth was how they met in the original timeline. This time it killed them."
"Yeah, well we've all lost people." Allison remarked
Frustration built up within Five at her petty comments and before he could think of the words he was saying, he spat,
"She's lost a lot more than you have, so maybe go easy on the judgement Allison."
Five could see Allison's shocked expression at his words and although he was about to say something more considerate to make up for it, he stopped when he saw your head snap to look behind you.
"(Y/N)?" He called
Once more you could see a wall of energy coming your way. You quickly put down the glass bottle, firmly leaned against the bar and tried to steady your breathing hoping you could fight what you knew was coming. Your effort meant nothing though as the wall smacked into you. You could feel a sharp tearing pain cut across the top of your left hand causing you to let out a scream. Instinctively, your right hand grabbed at your left making you let go of the bar and sending you falling to the ground.
Immediately, Five blink away from his siblings catching you before you could hit the floor. Carefully, he helped you kneel on the ground and held on to you since he was powerless to do anything else. Tiny cries of agony spilled from your mouth between each shallow breath you took causing the rest of the Hargreeves to come over to see what was wrong. But all you could do at the moment was wait it out. And luckily a moment later, it stopped. You leaned against your boyfriend letting you body collapsed as it let all its tension go.  You couldn't keep doing this. Either the waves were getting stronger or the source was getting close. Or worse, both. You continued to hold your hand against your body until you felt someone grab it.
"(Y/N) you're bleeding." Diego said frantically "Klaus check behind the bar for a first aid kit."
Straightening up you finally looked down at your hands. There was an open gash atop the left one where you had felt the searing pain and your right hand that had held it was covered in fresh blood. This was a bad sign. A very bad sign.
You could see as Klaus rushed over to Diego with a tiny red box in his hands. Grabbing the first aid kit from him Diego immediately went to work cleaning up your hands and addressing the gash. It wasn't large enough to need stitches but it would have to stay wrapped up. And as he wrapped the gauze bandaging around your hand, you looked to Five and quietly said,
"That's the fourth one."
"Fourth one of what?" Diego questioned
He was worried about you. Apparently four people you know have died and now you were screaming and bleeding out of nowhere.
"Energy waves."  You responded weakly
"First we don't exist, now there's energy waves. What the hell is going on?" Diego demanded
"Let's get her to a better place before diving into things." Five said concerned
"There's a lounge upstairs with some couches and chairs." Viktor suggested "We can keep talking there."
"Good idea," Five replied as he helped you up "C'mon, love."
Standing up again, your knees felt a little shaky but you were able to manage. You looked over at the bar where the newspaper clipping about your parents was still residing next to the bottle of alcohol you had grabbed.
"Five, can you get the newspaper piece," You requested "I don't want to get blood on it and ruin it."
"Of course darling." He replied
Five was about to pass you off to Diego to help you stand when a voice loudly shouted,
"Dad! I finished counting on the doorknobs on the third floor!"
You watched as in walked Diego's alleged kid, Stan. You scowled at the sight of him. He wasn't Diego's kid. Anyone with half a brain could see that, but unfortunately Diego did not have half a brain. You were annoyed by his presence but still reached out to grab on to Diego so Five could go pick up the article about your parents. It was all you had left of them. But before you could grab on, he had walked out of your reach and over to where Stan stood. You scowl dropped as your face morphed into an expression of hurt. You watched as Diego said something to Stan but you couldn't tell what as the sounds of the world became muffled.
Five's expression of concern though morphed into a scowl as he watched Diego walk away from you. Diego "She's my little princess and I'd do anything for her because I'm her older brother and you're bad for her" Hargreeves just walked away from you. And solely just to argue with the dumb kid into leaving him alone. He could see the pain in your eyes and the hurt on your face at what he'd done. Five held onto you tighter and although he wanted to say something, about how Diego was being a shit parent, you were already going through enough and he didn't want to rub salt in the wound. Five looked back to see Klaus grabbing the book of newspaper clippings from the edge of the bar.
"Klaus grab that paper on your way back." Five requested
Klaus nodded his head and as he passed by, he picked up the article about your parents and handed it over to Five.
"I got the paper, let's head upstairs." Five suggested, as he placed the article into one of his vest pockets
You looked away from Diego and Stan and back toward Five. You weren't quite sure what he had said but you nodded your head yes. Whatever it was, it was probably logical. And just like that Five had flashed you two to the lounge upstairs. Sitting you down in one of the soft chairs, you watched as Five had walked over to a nearby coffee machine and began brewing you and him both a cup. As the coffee finished, he poured two cup and walked back over to you handing you one. You gave him a polite smile and took a sip but didn't say much else. The coffee did help you to regain some energy though and you began to at least physically feel better. Slowly, the rest of the group filed in and as Klaus placed the book on one of the pool tables, the rest of the Hargreeves went to stand around it. Stan however had picked up a pool stick and was attempting what looked like to be a shitty form of karate.
"I'm so confused." Diego stated
"Shocking." Allison mocked
"Well, someone killed our mothers, so we shouldn't exist. But clearly, we do exist, and the universe can't handle it, which is a problem." Viktor reiterated
"Big problem." Five repeated as he took a sip from his cup
Five had no leads on what to do. Just the information he had now and it really wasn't much to go off of. Plus, whatever was going on was harming you physically on top of all the emotional damage you were dealing with. It was a bad situation all around and he felt like shit not knowing how to immediately fix it.
"Yah!" Stan yelled as attempted the crane kick from The Karate Kid movie
"Stanley!" Diego yelled pointing a knife in his direction "Now is not the time to be doing karate, okay?"
"Mom said I need to practice." Stan yelled back
"Yeah, well, she's not wrong. You're very bad." Diego criticized
"Well, I saved your pathetic ass!" Stan remarked
Rolling your eyes you slurped down more of your coffee. The sound of them bickering was infuriating. Diego was stupid and Stan was such a whiny fucking kid which made for an awful pair. Why did Diego even want to be around this kid though? He had no redeeming qualities. At least when you were his age you actually had good traits about you. You still had good traits, hell they were probably even better now. Things would be so much better if Stan just disappeared.
"Okay, hold on. Five, so we caused a paradox. What does that mean?" Allison questioned
"It's hard to say." Five explained "It's all been theoretical until now, but things have started to disappear."
"What things?" Viktor questioned
"Right now? Uh, lobsters." Five answered
"And a shit ton of cows!" Klaus exclaimed sitting up from the floor
"But I have a feeling this is just the beginning." Five mentioned
"A feeling? Aren't you retired?" Allison jabbed
"I want nothing more." Five stated sincerely
It was true. He wanted to be retired. He didn't want a third apocalypse. He didn't want to keep fighting. But how could he not get involved when it was hurting the people around him.
His answer wasn't good enough for Allison though. Once again, the world was ending and the common denominator always happened to be Five. Tired of his apocalyptic bullshit Allison scolded,
"You know, you can't drag us through hell because you have an itch only an apocalypse can scratch and then expect us to deal with the fallout."
Your head snapped towards Allison as anger built within you. What fucking world was she living in where she and the others dealt with the fallout? The only people who dealt with anything were you and Five. You two were the only ones who cared to try and save the world and preserve this family and there was no thanks for it. Especially toward Five. He stated a billion times that he doesn't like apocalypses and had even apologized for them being in apocalyptic situations even though for the most part it was out of his control. And not that you wanted to redirect anger, but for the past two times Viktor was the cause. Allison was being unreasonable and honestly a bitch. And for the first time since you had gotten back you gave actual input on the situation.
"Deal with the fallout? We couldn't even get you to deal with the problem the first two times." You snapped "Getting you guys to work together is like trying to pull teeth out of coked up horse. Blindfolded."
Everyone's heads turned to look at you. Your temper was a known fact to them all but such an outburst seemed uncharacteristic. Typically your complaints were specific and targeted, but this time you had directed it at all of them. All of them had heard some terrible things in their lives but there was something different and painful about you scolding them all. But your criticism did nothing to break Allison's resolve as she retorted,
"He's not the boss."
Jumping from your seat you reappeared in front of Five, putting yourself between him and Allison. You stared her down. No one was going to speak to your boyfriend like that.
"Well if you want to take the lead so bad then present your theorem." You snidely remarked "Which is of course backed up by 45 years of apocalypse and time travel experience. Right?"
Flames flickered in your eyes as you held your glare and tiny bolts of electricity jumped off you threatening to shock Allison if she got any closer. She hated it, but he was in no mood to fight you, and conceded.
"That's what I thought." You commented smugly
"Listen, I'm telling you something terrible is coming." Five explained
"Then let's go attack the Sparrows, get the briefcase, and go home." Allison suggested aggressively
"This is our home, Allison." Five replied "Accept it."
Allison looked past you, silently staring Five down but before any other words could be said the sound of clattering came from across the room as Stan knocked down a rack of pool sticks from doing his shit karate.
"Ugh..." You groaned rolling your eyes
This kid was a piece of work and you hated that he was around. All he did was hold the group back and distract Diego from the important things.
"That's it! I'm telling your mom." Diego yelled
"Wait, where's Lila?" Five questioned
"Shower. I told her she could stay with us." Stan remarked
"Wait. When did Lila get back?" Viktor asked
Five hated the idea of it, but if something was going wrong time he needed to talk to someone else who had extensive knowledge of it. Lila obviously wasn't as good as him, but his siblings were of no help, so it was one of the only options he had left. And the sooner he got this over with, the better. Placing his coffee cup down, Five turned away from the group and began to head toward the stairs.
"Five, where are you going?" Diego asked
"To go talk to somebody who only has half her head up her ass." Five commented heading towards the stairs
"Don't leave, Five. Don't leave." Klaus whined
"No, Klaus. I'm leaving." Five stated
First, Stan showed up and now Lila was back? She tried to kill you all yesterday and then dropped off some kid that's she trying to pass of as her and Diego's son. He really wanted to go to her? Why?! It was a bad idea. No, it was an irresponsible idea. Honestly, one of the dumbest ideas your boyfriend had ever produced and he was willing to fight himself over you. Rushing over to him you grabbed his wrist causing him to turn back.
"Baby, no. We can figure it out without her." You pleaded
He saw the disappointment in your eyes. You didn't like this and neither did he but whatever this was it was dangerous. Not only for existence itself but for you. He failed you once, he wasn't going to do it again.
"The sooner I figure this out, the sooner you'll stop getting hurt." He explained softly "I need you to trust me."
"But-" You tried to say
"Please." Five begged
You stared at him. He had no intention of changing his mind so all you could do was let him go. Releasing his wrist, you let out a huff as you relented,
"Fine."
"Thank you."
Your face had fallen as you looked off to the side away from him. Five let out a sigh. He wished it wasn't this way. Placing a light kiss to your cheek, he walked off to find Lila. You didn't turn to watch him leave, you knew it would hurt more if you did and so you stayed in place.
"I mean, he has a good track record with this stuff. I feel like we should listen to him." Viktor implored
"Sure. Hey, quick question. Do none of you heartless bastards care about our murdered moms?" Klaus inquired
"Klaus, the only one that we knew plugged into a wall." Allison remarked
"Oh yeah? Well, this is my real mother. And she's called Rachel." Klaus explained "And I have her eyes. See? Come on! We need to find out who did this! This is the thing! This is the main thing!"
You shut your eyes tightly. Why couldn't your life just be normal? Why couldn't you go back to the days where your biggest issues were you masochist chem teacher and the dumb shit your friends would get into. You were tired of fighting. Tired of the day in and day out of saving the world. You were never meant to be a hero. You were supposed to be you. And with all this talk of dead parents it just rubbed salt in the wound. Emotional salt that reminded you your life was not normal and would never be so. Your hands clenched into fists and as you heard the bickering of the Hargreeves behind you, you couldn't take it anymore. You felt frustrated. You felt alone. You felt desperate.
Desperate...
That word hit you just as the wall of energy had done earlier. You remembered the gift that Dot had given you. She told you to use it when you felt desperate. You never expected to use it this soon, but you needed to know what it was and what it could do for you. You took a look at the Umbrellas behind you, but none of them were focused on you. Not like you expected them to, but since they didn't care, neither did you. Walking down the stairs you made you way to the elevator and up to the fifth floor. As the elevator doors opened your curiosity and need to know what was in the pouch grew more. You could feel as you picked up your pace and when you made it to your door, you didn't even take the time to open it. Instead you just walked through and made a b-line to your duffle bag.
Grabbing the pouch from your duffle bag you quickly opened it up pulling out the note that was inside. As you read it over your eyes went wide at the possibility of what it meant for you. It meant that you didn't have to feel desperate. It meant you weren't going to be alone. In this pouch was a second chance to bring back part of the life you lost due to jumping through time. You were going to do this. You had no choice because in your mind you knew this would make things better for you. But if you were going to do this, you knew it couldn't be done here. But you knew exactly where to go to start the process.
But there were some things that you needed to get and bring with you. Emptying your duffle bag you quickly shoved your clothes into dresser drawers and placed all your memorabilia and trinkets carefully on the desk. Grabbing your knives you placed them on your person before putting and a jacket and throwing the pouch your pocket. You looked around the room seeing if you needed anything else but there was nothing else to take except the duffle bag. Grabbing the empty bag, you rushed out of the room and down the hall to the elevator. Taking it all the way to the bottom floor you ran down the hall grabbing things you would need from rooms and filling your bag. And when all your supplies were acquired, you zipped up the bag, threw it on your back and knew it was time to go.
You didn't bother taking an elevator up to the lobby and instead went to the ballroom and exited out the back door. Making a sharp left turn out the door you walked down the food service delivery alley until you had made it to the street outside. You looked around for some type of transportation, anything to get you there faster than on foot. There were plenty of cars on the street but you didn't want to spend the time trying to hot wire them. And although you knew the busses were still running, none of them would take you where you needed to go. You started to panic as you thought about how much longer it would take you if you solely had to walk, but them by some miracle you watched as a guy across the street chained up his bike before heading into his apartment building. And once he shut that door, you rushed across the street and phased the bike through its chain setting it free.
With transportation now in hand you hopped on it and began to ride away into the night. You knew where you needed to go. You had been there so many times before that you knew the way by heart. As you peddled like your life depended on it you could feel that place call to you, pulling you in like siren's song. Your mind was focused, you had no other thoughts except the plan you had in mind. And that plan carried you where you needed to go. After about 15 minutes the skyscrapers and city blocks turned into residential streets lined with houses.
You were close.
You looked at the street signs, making sure to turn done the right road and once you did you counted the numbers on the houses going by. Slowly the grew closer and closer to the one you were looking for. And then you saw it. You hit the breaks, coming to a full stop in front of one house.
You had made it.
Getting off the bike you threw it into the grass of the front lawn as you walked up to the front steps. You actions were slower now. More deliberate. The house was dark and there was no car you could see in the driveway. Most would probably assumed the place was empty at first glance. But very faintly you could see a light on through a window on the side of the house. As you approached the door you placed your duffle bag on the porch hiding it underneath the porch bench and carefully pulled the pouch from your pocket. You looked within it, taking the exact item you needed before closing it up and placing it in your duffle bag so it wouldn't rattle around in your pocket.  And when you were done you took a deep breath and readied yourself.
You had one shot.
Turning invisible you phased yourself through the door. You stepped into the dark house, taking light steps and you went along to where you needed to go. You turned left down a hallway and walked to the end where you saw a closed door, light illuminating from behind it. With one more breath you sneaked down the hall and phased into the room seeing exactly the sight you hoped you would. An individual faced away from the door sitting at a desk. You slowly came up behind them and looked at the needle in your hand.
This was it.
In one swift motion you stabbed it into their neck dispensing the liquid within it into their system. Pulling the needle out, you watched as they placed their hand over their neck let out a grunt of pain. You watched as their body tenses up for a moment but then they froze. You could see as their shoulders dropped and they turned to look behind them. You were still invisible, but you were positive they knew you were there. Dropping your invisibility to locked eyes with them and you could see as their eyes went wide. they opened their mouth, hesitating for a moment, but then quietly called,
"(Y/N)?"
And as you stared back all you could reply was,
"Hi, Dean."
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canirove · 2 years
Text
Meu Amor | Chapter 1
Summary: "I don't have time for boys, Taylor. Especially not football players. I want to make the most of this opportunity. Who knows the doors it can open for me."
"The ones of Rúben Dias' house are already open" she says with a smirk.
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━   
When an unexpected promotion at your job as a journalist for Sky Sports, may end up not only changing your professional life, but also your personal one.
Author's note: I got the inspiration for this story while watching a basketball game and seeing a Spanish journalist who is married to one of the players. She has to work during many of his games, sometimes even having to interview him, and both of them always are super profesional.
The idea of writing it with Rúben is all thanks to my friend Ana (hi 👋🏻), who has been obssesed with him since the end of last season, and sending me photos and videos daily. You can thank her for it 😅
Thank you very much for reading, and I hope you like it! 💜
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“Ok, guys. I’ve got good news and bad news. Where should I start?”
“Bad news always first.”
“John had a fall last night while training, injured his knee pretty badly, and will be out for the rest of the year.”
“Oh my God, is he alright?”
“He is in a lot pain, but he is having surgery today. He told me not to worry, that he will be fine. But as much as it sucks, his bad news lead us to the good ones. One of you will be covering for him, and the lucky one is… Taylor!”
“Me? But what about Manu? Shouldn’t he be the one covering for John since he is his assistant?” Taylor asks.
“I was going to tell you once he came back from his holidays, but nevermind. He has accepted an offer to join the Champions League team. It’s less work, and that way he can help at home.”
“So that means that Taylor and I are the new John and Manu?” I ask.
“Exactly. Congratulations girls! Your first game will be the Manchester derby. Hope you enjoy it!”
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━    
“Relax, girl. We’ll be ok and totally nail this, trust me” Taylor says, putting a hand on my leg and trying to make it stop moving.
“Oh, I’m not nervous. Well, maybe a bit. What I am the most, is excited” I reply. We are finally doing pitch side work, and I can’t wait.
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━    
I finished my journalism degree two years ago. While most people knew the field they wanted to work in, I wasn’t sure, I liked too many things. But one day, after seeing a female journalist covering a football game, I said to myself: maybe I can do that too. I sent a curriculum to Sky Sports, and God knows why and how, they called me back.
I expected to spend most part of my time doing things for others, from getting coffees to ordering files. Just as you see on movies. But to my surprise, they had me join the Premier League team as an assistant.
During my first year, I helped transcribing the notes others took during games, turning them into articles for the website. They were articles about the smaller teams, those only their fans care about, but I was writing and my name was there.
One day, one of the guys I worked with had to cover for someone from the Big 6 team, aka, the most important clubs in the country, the ones everyone watched on tv. It was a Manchester United – Liverpool, and we weren’t watching it from home. We were at the stadium, sharing our spot with journalists from all around the country, seeing it all first hand. And I fell in love with it. This was what I wanted to do. To actually live the games and share that with those at home.
For some reason, Taylor read the article I wrote that day, asked around… And the following week I was working as her assistant and becoming part of the Big 6 team. I wasn’t writing anymore, but just being by her side during meetings and helping wherever I was needed, was enough. An all this was finally paying off, making me go back to Manchester and to the actual pitch side.
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━    
“I’m going to the bathroom before we start. Can you make sure everything is ready and that no one ruins our spot?” Taylor says.
“Sure, don’t worry.”
We are at the Etihad, Manchester City’s stadium, the game starting in 20 minutes. The players are already warming up, and Taylor should be doing her live in just a bit. After that, we’ll stay close to the benches, taking notes during the game, reporting back during the halftime, and doing the interviews once the game is over.
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━    
“Taylor, where are you?” I mutter, checking my watch for the 10th time since she left. If she doesn’t come back soon, she’ll miss the live.
As I turn back to look at the pitch and make sure that everything is alright, I see a guy just in the middle of our set. Great.
“Excuse me, sir” I say, walking towards him. “This is a tv set, you can’t be here.”
Nothing, he doesn’t move. He is typing on his phone, the world around him gone. I let out a sigh and try to talk to him again, this time closer. He is way taller than I expected, and his back is huge. Like two times mine. No, maybe three.
“Sir. Sir, this is a tv set, you must move” I say, raising my voice. But nothing. “Sir, please” I say again, touching his arm. Even though he is wearing a jacket, I can feel his bicep. And just as his back, it is huge.
“Oh, hi” he says, starting to turn to look at me.
“Hi, sorry” I say, my hand staying on his arm for longer than it should have. “This is a tv set and we should be having a live any minute now. You must move somewhere else.”
“Yes, yes, I’m very sorry” he replies, his eyes fixed on me.
“Ok, thank you” I say, clearing my throat. Why is he looking at me like that? Is there something on my face?
“Mr. Dias, hello!” Taylor says behind me. Finally! “Such a pity that you aren’t able to play today.”
“Yeah, I know. But please, I already told you. Call me Rúben” he says. Do these two know each other?
“Yes, my bad. Sorry. Could we get you for a halftime interview? Are you watching the game from the VIP area or here next to the bench?” Taylor asks him.
“Yes, of course. And I was going to watch it from upstairs, but I’ve changed my mind” he says, looking at me.
“Oh, great. Then if they give us green light, we’ll see you later.”
“Looking forward to it” he smiles.
“Who was that?” I ask Taylor as I watch him leave. Though before he completely disappears among the crowd, I see him turning around to look back at me, giving me another intense look from head to toe, one that makes me blush a bit. Or a lot.
“Rúben Dias.”
“That’s him?”
“Of course that’s him! You are the most thorough person I know, you check every single detail, and you didn’t recognize him? Him? Last season’s best player?”
“You know Manchester City isn’t my cup of tea” I shrug.
“And Chelsea isn’t mine and I still know all their players faces. Anyway, you should start to pay more attention to him. You’ve definitely caught his” Taylor winks.
“Me? What? No!”
“He only had eyes for you! And he looked at you on purpose when he said that he had changed his mind about from where he was going to watch the game.”
“That was just a coincidence.”
“That was not a coincidence and you know it.”
“That… Ugh, Taylor, we are here to work, not to flirt with players. And we have a live in…” I say, checking my watch “2 minutes! C’mon, we need to get ready!
“Fine, fine” she says, rolling her eyes.
━━━━━━❃━━━━━━    
“He fancies you.”
“Taylor, please don’t start again. My head hurts” I say, closing my eyes and trying to find a comfortable position on my seat. We still have an hour left until the train makes it to London, and a nap would do me wonders.
“But it is the truth! He is super serious with his job, something he has in common with you. And he always gives his 100% and puts all his focus on it, even if he isn’t playing. But today? Today he couldn’t stop looking to the side, to where you were. And during the game, I also caught him looking at you a few times.”
“He was just probably looking at the pitch, at his teammates.” Though I must say I also looked at him a few times, and he wasn’t paying attention to the game. He was looking at us. At me.
“Seriously, girl. One of the hottest guys on the Premier League only had eyes for you today. You should be ecstatic!”
“I don’t have time for boys, Taylor. Especially not football players. I want to make the most of this opportunity. Who knows the doors it can open for me.”
“The ones of Rúben Dias’ house are already open” smirks.
“I’m serious, Taylor. You’ve been working for longer than a decade. I haven’t. I need this to work out.”
“I know. And I’m sorry. I promise I won’t play matchmaker anymore and will focus on our job. Unless he sends me a dm asking me for your number or something. That’s the only exception.”
“Fine” I say, giving up. “You need to tell me how you two met, tho.”
“We’ll leave that story for another day. Now try to rest, I’ll wake you up when we make it back to London.”
And as I close my eyes and try to sleep, my mind chooses to relive everything that has happened today. Especially the moments that involve him. Rúben Dias.
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chained-to-the-mirror · 11 months
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I looked through my notes and apparently last time I sat down to write my thoughts was in February. I had been struggling with my body image and had a nasty nightmare. I’ve not had very nasty nightmares now, but the body image thing is ever present.
I recently bought swimwear for the first time since my early teens. (Let it be noted that I’ll be 43 in a month.) It was inspired by a friend who is coming to visit and wants to go swimming. I was so nervous to even try on a swimsuit… but I did it. I now have two swimsuits/swimwear. I wonder how it will be to actually go out in public wearing them - not easy, probably, but hopefully it will be at least somewhat enjoyable in the end.
Also a new thing is that I’ve been wearing shorts now. It’s almost 30 degrees here and suddenly I’ve noticed I don’t care what others think. I even wore an almost sleeveless top! Who am I?! I think this is due to age, and running out of fucks to give. I mean, does anyone really care what I’m wearing? I don’t think so. I just want to be as comfortable as possible. 
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I’m putting my outfit from yesterday here - I would never have been able to wear this a year ago, no matter how hot it got. I’m surprised at myself. Also shocked at how comfortable I was eventually! There was no panicking, no distress. I see all the flaws, but it just matters less and less. I undoubtedly sound like a broken record, but I’m just so surprised.
I don’t think I would be at this point without my dear friends. They keep me sane, truly - and they never seem to get tired of shooting down my negative self talk, which matters more than anyone would guess. I love them all very much.
Another thing that’s helping is plants. I’ve become a full time plant parent, and it feels good to see things growing under my care. I’ve never been able to really do this successfully until now. I’m currently sitting on my balcony, surrounded by my green babies, and I feel calm. It’s no small thing, to feel calm! The plants also help me practice being patient. My huge tomato is testing me - there are so many flowers, but no fruit. Not even beginnings, apart from one that’s smaller than the tip of my pinky. I’m told it takes time, but I just worry. I am doing my best though, and that will have to be enough.
I don’t know where I’m going with all this, except nowhere. I suppose this is my blog, and I can go nowhere as much as I wish. I was going to write something the other day, but when the time came, I found I had no words anymore. Much like now! But I was thinking a lot about my active ED years for some reason. I used to be one of the moderators on a pro ana forum - one of the nice ones, one that helped me keep myself together for a long time. I was close to several people on there - I wonder where they are now? I kept in touch with a couple even after I was discharged from my first hospital stay, but these days I have lost contact with them. I hope they have found their own ways out. We were all sick, and brought together by being alone in our respective sicknesses. 
I kept a journal on the forum - it was full of misery and wallowing, so I’m sort of glad I have no access to it anymore. In fact, I don’t even know what became of the forum after I left. I’ve tried to find it again, but nothing comes up on google at least. It was always a very private, invitation only forum. Everyone supported everyone, in both sickness and recovery (whichever way any of us went at the time). I think I’m - ironically - alive because of those girls. (I say girls, because it was all girls. I think there may have been one boy at one point, but he was not very active.)
It’s such a weird experience, and I can’t really explain it to anyone who hasn’t been a part of a place like that. I tried to explain it to the nurses and the doctors at the hospital, but I don’t think they got it. They saw it as harmful, and probably fairly. In fact, the whole thing made me realize how futile group therapy would be for eating disorders. It can go wrong in so many ways! I’ve only had personal therapy so I can’t be sure of course, but it just feels suspicious. At least for me. I think that you have to be mostly in recovery to really be able to get any help from a group. I think that I might be able to, now - now that I’m mostly recovered. But of course it’s not something that’s available for me anymore. The EDs are not even in my diagnoses - not the main ones anyway. You’d have to dig pretty deep.
I guess this is what I wanted to get out. I’m not proud of my involvement in a thing like the pro ana movement, but I can’t fully bring myself to be sorry either. These things happen for a reason, and the reason was to keep me alive. I’m grateful for that.
It’s time to stop writing. My plants around me are telling me to wrap up the day, and they are right. I only need a shower and then I can fully relax. Thank you to anyone who read this, it’s a mess!
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(tl;dr - if you've ever read something I wrote and enjoyed it even a little? I love you.)
I turned 33 today, and I'm thinking about dreams.
When I was in first grade, our teacher gave us an assignment to write a story and we would use cereal boxes to make a little book out of it. And something clicked in my little six-year-old brain - you mean you can just make books?? Anyone can just write down a story? I was already devouring every book I could get my hands on, and from the moment I realized I could be an active part of the storytelling I adored so much, I wrote and wrote and wrote and wrote.
I wrote in my free time. I wrote in my school journals. I discovered fanfiction, and I wrote and wrote and wrote and wrote. And I dreamed. I crafted new characters and wove new worlds and dreamed about being a published author. It wasn't my only dream - I cycled through teacher barrel racer book editor psychologist programmer historian one by one - but it was my most constant and most persistent dream. I had doubts about every desire but that one. As long as I could write, I would be okay.
My entire life has been one survival situation after another. There were external monsters and internal monsters and every birthday came as a surprise. One by one, every dream I had fell by the wayside. Whether it was about a career that didn't involve a cash register or about living somewhere I could make feel like home or about who I wanted to be inside, they all got smaller and smaller until they dropped away entirely. I was so. fucking. tired. But I wrote. And as long as I could write, I would be okay.
And then somewhere, that stopped too.
I tried. Sometimes I sat up and sifted through the ashes of my dreams for the words I loved so much. Sometimes I even managed to get one down, and then another, and wondered if that was the glow of an ember I saw. I picked it up and tried to breathe life into it and it crumbled away again in my hands. And again, and again.
In the fall of 2021, I dropped out of college for the third time, one final course short of my degree. Another dream dead, and I was almost surprised that it wasn't a surprise this time. I got a job that lasted all of two weeks. I lost my cat, my best friend of 15 years I'd raised since the day she was born. My wife and I depleted our savings again on bills and groceries; a decade of living apart and still nothing to show for it. I was so. fucking. tired.
I didn't write. Hadn't written for a long time. What was the point?
But I still read, even if infrequently, because a love for stories is woven into my soul as strongly as my grandmother's eyes and my mother's cheekbones are woven into my DNA. And I still wrote stories in my head, little flickers of ideas that glowed even as I feared touching them lest they crumble again.
And then one night, one of those stories glowed a little stronger than the others, and I thought...why not? It was late, and I didn't want to get out my laptop, and it wasn't a Yu Yu Hakusho fic so I couldn't ask for feedback in the only discord I spent any real time in, and I thought...why not?
So in 2022 I took the words from my head and put them on Tumblr, and went to sleep. I didn't expect any response, really, maybe a couple of likes from the few, new, MCYT mutuals I had at the time if I was lucky. It didn't matter, because it was just another stubborn ember that I picked up just long enough to move it aside so I could sleep, and surely it would be dead by morning.
It got those couple of likes. And then a couple more. And then some more. And it got reblogs. It got tags.
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(tag credits, in order: mochiwrites / sleepygaming / totallynotpuri / boatemmyboatem / actuallymothman / girltimeswithscar / mags-the-bug / crazypercheron)
It was 700 barely-spellchecked words I posted on a whim, and people liked it. Authors whose works I read and thought "I wish I could write that well" liked it. I personally didn't think it was very good, but it was good enough, and I had more ideas, so...I wrote. And wrote, and wrote, and wrote.
Somewhere in the last 15 months, I found my dream again.
Somewhere in the last 15 months, I started believing your words.
I can still see all the cracks and flaws and rough edges in everything I write. But I can see the good things in it now, too. Because, well, if you didn't like it at least a little bit, you'd have just scrolled on past, right? And I can improve what needs improving. I can write fanfiction to hone my craft and find a community, and maybe even pick up original writing again. I can write. And if I can write? I'll be okay.
Everyone who's left a comment, a tag, even just a like or a kudos - you've helped breathe life into that little ember I thought was long dead. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. I love you. <3
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taylor-swiftfacts · 2 years
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Taylor Swift Facts turns 10!
(Photo: the oldest header I could find on the Wayback machine, from early 2013)
My fellow Swifties,
Today is the 10-year anniversary of the date I posted the very first SwiftFact. I wanted to say thank you to everyone who has been by my side for this amazing journey. This blog has never been just a blog for me - it's been a source of connection, of fun, of support, of appreciation for Taylor and her music.
I began TSF when I was 13, using my home computer. My family had gone through some financial difficulties and, at the time, I didn't even have internet access. I would bring my little USB to the library, save my facts on a Word document, and save the corresponding pictures. I'd go home and make my little posts. I really had no concept of graphic design at the time, so my older posts are honestly quite ugly, but hey. I just wanted to share the information!
I think this blog actually helped me figure out I wanted to be a journalist. I often tell people that I got my degree in journalism because I love learning about things and sharing them with others. That's what I've done here for a decade! Getting the right quotes, deciding which information is most important, even using the inverted pyramid of journalism. I honed a lot of those skills here.
Not to mention, the community that has been here for me. I won't belabor you with my life story, but I used to be quite open about my family struggles on here, and the outpouring of support was always so touching. Some of you even donated money when my family was in need, which is so beautiful and something we all still talk about from time to time. And when my mom passed away, I wasn't posting as frequently, but you all showed me so much love and support anyways. Even though I wasn't giving you much, you gave me everything.
I exchanged Christmas cards for a couple years with tons of you, which made me feel infinitely less lonely. I stopped due to some mental health struggles, but I still have all of your cards, and I see that as a highlight of not only this blog, but of my life. There has been so much real human connection fostered with this little fan blog I created on a whim. I am so grateful.
The craziest thing that has come out of this blog - barring Taylor's follow and even a couple of likes - is the fact that VividSeats gave me tickets to the 1989 tour in 2015. That is one of the top 10 experiences of my life, and I believe it always will be. I can't even express how much that means to me. And maybe I still put the review I wrote for their site on my resume. ;)
All of this is to say, this blog has been an integral part of my growing and changing. Some of my past personal posts on here make me cringe. Some of the facts I would not publish today as the fandom culture has shifted significantly. I learned and grew with this blog. Despite some of the controversy - I feel some people have never liked my blog - the love has kept me going. I am so grateful for every ounce of support anyone here has ever given me.
I apologize for posting sporadically the last few years. Life happens, and I have significantly different priorities than I did in 2012 - I assume we all do - but the reason I've kept posting at all is because I enjoy it. You make it enjoyable. That being said, I'll try my best to get some posts out just in celebration of Midnights and the whirlwind of Taylor content we've gotten the last few years. Even though social media moves so quickly these days, and the format of my blog isn't quite conducive to that anymore, I hope we can all enjoy it. Like the good old days. :)
Even writing all of this, I feel like I can't even begin to express how special this journey has been. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, to everyone who has ever supported me in any way.
Grace
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voxasks · 27 days
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🫐 -Hey there, why not get in on this, haha. Let's go, show me what ya got TV man- Jokes aside, I am a young woman in her 20s going to university for a psychology degree. I am very ambitous & goal oriented, even if it is sometimes very intense. To the point of hyperfixation bordering on obsession. I was going for journalism originally, but I changed majors because I didn't like how much I would have to lick the butts & shoes of yellow journalists who aren't worth my respect or time. I wanted to be part of the information side of things & keep people informed on the happenings around them. But all they do from my perspective is waste hours churning out fiction for views. If I wanted to do that, I would have pursued acting as a career, which is a hobby of mine. I like community theater a lot. It is a fun escape from everything. Something just so satisfying about putting on a show, where the moment I step out on that stage & feel those lights & eyes on me, I am no longer concerned with my problems. The mask is on & won't be off until later~! Music is my other passion. I love writing my own music and lyrics. I play the violin, piano, & guitar. I am taking singing lessons for fun too. My few friends describe me as the one they look to for honest opinions, even if it might not be something they want to hear. I am also weirdly regarded as a ball of energy. I am not a recluse, I just have intense trust issues. It is probably due to the pathetic jokes of relationships I have had, among other potential trauma inducing experiences. I love going out, just only with people I would trust my life with or myself. I am still quite introverted, but I do like the atmosphere of people having a great time & me having a good time, even if it is dancing on my own. If I feel like it, I will just make the decision to disappear for a weekend & hop back around come Monday like I didn't just drop off the planet to who knows where & do who knows what. I am used to the not so great side of life. Walking to school, seeing a dead body on the side of the road, later on seeing those infamous white lines, hahaha. What a day that was, or the time I had to hit the deck from a drive-by. You get used to that rough life than wham in a place that is weirdly sanitized and "safe." It feels like whiplash. I cope with my experiences with humor. Rather laugh than cry, you know. Psych became my interest after taking a random elective in it, & I was hooked on being able to make connections about the world & people around me. Giving me a sense of understanding some of the why's I have asked for years. I'm still learning more, too. I have some ideas that are not exactly conventional & push a few boundaries with other fields of science & ethics. Regardless, I hope to use the knowledge I am gaining to help others help themselves. I think that is a key component in life, to be able to help yourself, even if it means getting/seeking help in order to get to a place where you can do that for yourself. If that makes any sense. With all this said, enjoy your hellish morning, abysmal afternoon, explicit evening, or sinful night. Whichever it may be for you, I like to cover the bases~!
“it  feels  like  you  took  psychology  to  make  sense  of  the  things  that  has  happened  in  your  life  subconsciously.  at  least,  that’s  what  people  do  from  experience  anyway.  it  sort  of  feels  like  you  have  adhd  as  well  due  to  your  spontaneity,  being  described  as  a  ‘ball  of  energy’  and  having  many  interests,  but  hey,  i’m  far  from  being  some  lab  coat  shrink  who’s  qualified  enough  to  sit  behind  a  desk  to  rot  with  everyone  else’s  trauma.  you  want  to  stay  true  to  yourself  no  matter  what,  thus  opting  out  of  journalism  to  avoid  kissing  other  people’s  asses,  i  can  respect  that.  you  sound  ambiverted,  someone  who  struggles  to  find  the  comfortable  balance  sometimes  but  everyone  does  too.  and  hey,  a  dead  body.  must  be  a  big  deal  back  in  the  living  world,  huh?  how’ve  you  been?”
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based off of the 200 follower event.
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bugznews · 1 month
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Dear Journal, Saturday, March 23, 2024
I did something out of the ordinary today. I showered, got dressed, and left the house. Most of the time when I shower, I just climb back into my pajamas.
You see my mom and I have a small family that we know very well. Since they have moved away from Montana, I send them a package now and then. We were just getting some last-minute things for that package. We will send it out on Monday.
I must admit that I miss this family so much. We used to do so much together every holiday. I would give anything just to spend a week with them if I could. But we just simply don’t have enough money for a road trip.
We do text all the time and that does help me with the hole in my heart. I can’t wait until the kids send me pictures of them and their new stuff. That always brightens my day.
I hope you all have someone like that in your life. It is just so important. With this friend, I feel like I can do anything and say anything. I can be myself.
Normally, I just put headphones on and ignore the world. You get the picture. Or I just hang out with my cat who knows exactly how to make me laugh.
I feel that this blog has changed me as I have gotten serious about it over time. At first, it didn’t feel like it was going anywhere. But then it lit a spark in me that continues to build. Now I have found my passion for writing once again.
I will be honest with you I haven’t had a love of writing since I got out of college. I got so burned out with all the writing assignments that I had to do. For me to find that love again is so important. I don’t want to do a job that I don’t have a passion for. I was starting to think that I had gotten the wrong degree when I was in school. Just turns out I had some writer’s block going. I just needed a lot of rest.
But after a while, I did realize that I missed writing. I started by writing in my private journal. At first that did satisfy the urge I had to write. A few months went by, and I wanted more. Truthfully if I could be chasing fire trucks I would be. But that wasn’t my point. What I was saying was that journaling wasn’t enough. It took me a long time to decide what I was going to write on my blog. But talking about mental health and my journey with it has made each day better for me. I never thought that was going to be possible.
Once again, I am taking Sunday off because I go to church. This normally does wear me out. To the point that a nap is required afterward.
I know that some of you are reading this, but you haven’t hit the follow button because you fear being judged. I am here to tell you it does not matter if you suffer from mental illness this is a judgment-free zone. There will be no bullying on my blog. Those that participate in that will be blocked. So, feel free to hit the follow button. Truthfully it would help me in my ambition to know that you are there.
I would also like to tell you that you are worth far more than you know. It is time to take back your power.
I am also starting to use Grammarly starting with this post. Please be understanding with me while I figure things out. I do think that this will make me a better writer after everything I can do. I am adding AI because I have no employees to help me with the grammar and editing side of things.
This is because I have no money to pay for one. But so far this seems to be going well. I hope you all had a wonderful Saturday. Have a great day.
Do something fun for a change. Why not change it up? I am going to post this and then go play video games. It is almost the end of the day, and I am just plain tired.
My mom worked for 7 straight days. Talk about having the whole house to myself. Plus, I was living off door dash. Now I would rather just have some normal food. I would like a great big salad if that is possible. Oh, I guess I am talking your ear off. I didn’t mean to do that at all. Have a good night.
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