#okay here it is. im sick of editing it so. have at.

[istherewifiinhell]

Tumblr users wifi's Chicken Pot Pie Recipe

Sort of anyway. due to my cooking method the following probably bridges the distance between old timey recipes where the author tells you to take a good amount of almonds and your just supposed to know what that means. and a very online much too conversational approach to instructions. fantastic

Frankly just picking a recipe and doing some freestyling on it is my method. And so my ingredients list is a general idea and if you want the explainers they are after that. and if you for some reason want my directions, which I do not recommend if you need real guidance and not just tips, those are last.

The suggested amounts may make you too much filling for an average pie crust. I do not consider this a problem.

Ingredients Filling

Chicken (or your choice) 1 Pound Onion 1 large. Sliced or diced. (adjust for how much you like onion and how long you like to cook em. caramelized will shrink) Carrot. 1 cup. Freestyle cut. I mince but maybe you cut circles Mushroom. 1 or more cups, again were adjusting for cook time shrinkage. I just cut them last and go until the pile looks right in proportion to other ingredients Potato. I'd love to give u a list of fancy potatoes, but its yukon gold all day every day here. i use one to two depending on size. Garlic. 3 cloves… Heavy scare quotes. I don't want to tell you 6 so then you do 12 okay. just. whatever you want. Ginger, while we're at it, if you like. shout out to garlic ginger paste havers Flour. just to coat the meat and veg, or you could thicken the sauce with cornstarch or other thickener. oh. oil or butter. whatever. pan grease of choice

Spice zone: (no measurements? yeah i know. see digression)

Chicken stock. You have bullion powder or cubes or a jar probably. good. me too. just add to your level of preferred salt and chicken-y goodness. or beefy or porky or veggy. Salt and pepper. you know this one. paprika. dont even. whatever you have. smoked is delicious, ive never had the hungarian stuff okay. oregano cumin turmeric. or saffron if ur rich, or bootleged ur own crocuses. leave out if you hate yellow (ur risk of staining something is probably high) chili powder (reference which paprika you used) ground coriander seed cinnamon or all-spice literally whatever you want. you want a curry pie. make that. you want piripiri pie. go for it. five spice. shichimi togarashi. whatever.

Crust

Enough for top and bottom of your pie. you can find many recipes. in general it will be something like 1 cup solid fat (butter lard shortening or margarine) 2-3 cups flour (pastry, all purpose, whole wheat. whatever. if your doing gluten free look into that) sugar and salt if you want. dried herbs if you really want cold water. a few spoonfuls you can fuck around with leavening even but ehhh

Ingredients Digression: search your heart, and your fridge

Chicken: Thigh would be my preference of course but someone has to eat all the white meat and sometimes that person is you. or maybe you have a rotisserie chicken from the grocery store. or maybe your gonna use beef or pork. thats fine. im not your boss. use meat substitute for all i care. The package we got on sale is some .950 kilos, and that clearly too much. so lets say .425 kg. Or just around 1 pound if you prefer.

Veg: Yeah I love mushrooms and I'm gonna put them in everything. Brown or white cap is common, portabello would be extra. Oyster mushroom would be delicious. Shiitake I don't like, and if you ever meet someone who would use enoki in this, have em call me I'd love to hear how that went. You dont like any of these, then don't add em. Leek, celery, peas, and corn all seem like fine choices to me. Any veg you like if it can handle the bake time. I don't ever recommend baking peppers but live ur bliss. As for measurements. I'm not actually using a cup. I just make piles on my cutting board and when i run out of room use regular eating bowls.

Spice zone: If you would like pot pie with just a bit more kick, stick to the paprika chili and cumin. If you wanna go full bananas, you could do a teaspoon of every spice you like. probably not the salt if your stock has salt tho. Keep in mind your own preferences. I don't measure. good luck. really think using spices as what they're for, which is coating and seasoning the food. it should colour the meal but if you can no longer see it you've probably gone to far. Taste and tweak as much as you like.

Pie crust and tin: use your favourite pie crust recipe. or not. or store bought is in fact fine. you just need enough for whatever tin your gonna use. A round tin is traditional and recommended. 18-25cm/7-10 in diameter range. A 4-7 cm/1-3 in deep. depending on size and shape of you hands, bigger than your hand splayed and no deeper than your finger... probably.

Directions: For the Desperate and Bored

Pie crust: Cut up solid fat. Work in flour (and other ingredients) till its all crumbley. looks like sand, breadcrumb etc. Should be a bit dry. Add cold water to bind it in a dough. Add this gradually, u do not want it sloppy style okay? You can do this with your hands, a food processor. Probably not a blender thought who knows. Maybe you put it in a couple layers of freezer bags and stomp on it. All good.

Make it to a ball, or lump shape, and put it in the fridge to firm up. Unless that would impede you ability to work the dough too much.

Rolling it out, or not? Here's the thing. You can just take the warm dough and pat it into you pie tin like graham cracker crust for cheese cakes. Just really compact it and get it up the sides of your tin. Don't say I never gave you anything.

The top crust would be more challenging to not roll out, but you could probably do the same with a greased or lined plate, leave both to chill in freezer. When time to fill, flop it on top of the filled pie, and let it warm up again to seal the pie edges.

If you roll it out. Flour your work surface. Pat the dough flat a bit, roll it out, turn the dough as you go to keep it even. Use you pie tin to check the size. Bottom crust needs to be bigger by how deep the pan is all around.

(See filling directions)

You could blind bake the bottom if you want. Stab the bottom crust with a fork a bunch to prevent bubbles. Either way. Filling goes into bottom crust. Pie lid on top of filling. Press or crimp the edges to seal it.

This is where the size of pan and amount of filling comes up. Make it as tall as you feel comfortable with/physics allow. Any left over filling can be eaten. If you did it right you, personally, will find it delicious. Also pies can take a long time and you might need the snack. Vent the lid (stab the crust. patterns welcome. left over dough can be used as decoration or as smaller pies for a fractal and recursive baking process)

Cooking Directions: Keep in mind the level of doneness you want for each veg, add to the pan in that order. Frozen peas and corn or whatever are going last if you want them in any way intact. If you want to reduce dishes use a real big pan or pot with a lot of bottom surface area My order: OIL UP THAT PAN. i want my veg saute'd not steamed okay? onions first. cook till a little less than you like. garlic and ginger (or any other seasoning paste if your using). you want aromatic not crispy. seriously if it looking ever a little too toasty take of the burner and add the next things and stir a bunch. burnt onions and garlic will ruin your whole meal carrots and mushrooms meat. if you dont want to transfer things out of the pan just push it to the side, watch out to not burn the bottom of that either, ur just moving the two different piles of stuff. you can season the meat before you cook it if you want but im not sure it matters. get to cooking the outside of the meat.. it will fully cook in the simmering sauce (If using Pre-Cooked meat add later) potato. again. cooking in the sauce sprinkle the flour on now and coat everything (i almost always forget this step so if you do thats fine. where just gonna thicken the sauce later) time to go to the spice zone. Add your liquids. Stock, or water with bouillon. some dairy product if you want. if you forgot the flour mix a little with the liquid and make a paste. and add more liquid and stir. add to pan I mean you could also do it by making a roux or bechemal. but its all really the same thing. You can simmer the sauce if you want more cooking time for your filling. (I would add pre-cooked meat and frozen peas or corn here, Stir!) Check for taste and tweak seasoning. It can be a little stronger than you like cause its going it mostly plain pastry.

BAKE IT. We're looking for good crust quality here. also additional cook time if any ingredients need more time to finish. depending on oven and pie size could be 20 mins to like. hour plus. i dunno

let rest before serving or whatever.

#some shit #okay here it is. im sick of editing it so. have at. #baking. chaos style. #okay to rb

[andragoras-in-vanity]

crisp rat aside im really looking forward to the mario movie, it looks so cute but you all need to know that im mostly just here for bowser

#okay and charlie day i think hell be a great luigi because....hes just kinda like that ngl #also i think hes adorable and luigi is baby #but i also really hope they dont try to make peach all rah rah girl power bullshit #sis gets kidnapped evrry other week she cant fight for SHIT put that lady back in a dress #shes supposed to be wise and royal don't blow this for us by making her just another generic girl #i used to really love her because she was kinda danger prone daphne and imagine the golden banter between a refined princess and bowser??? #anyway im really sick of the overcompensation with female characters now adays #just because she cant fight doesnt mean her character is pointless or weak #but anyway im still just here for bowser anyway jack black take it away #i also so hope this is a joke and they dont actually let the crisp rat version see the light of day #YouTube gave me an edit with charles martinet and GOD hes just the only mario!!!! like mario is kinda dumb thats the appeal of him!!!! #hes a plumber who has no clue whats going on but goes with it cause hes a sweetheart!!!! i like to imagine he blushes too hard to speak #when he meets peach the first time!!!! also luigi gets pegged thats why hes with daisy but that's a whole other thing #ANYWAY. #im going to enjoy it as long as i dont have to listen to the fascist the entire time #but yeah bowser got me ready

[slvtforfiction]

Could you pls write a Johnnie guilbert x f! Reader where reader is a famous song writer and she’s up late at night like around 2:00-3:00 am working on a new song and Johnnie is sick and tired of her staying up all night and not taking care of herself so one night he gets up and hauls her ass to bed and when reader try’s to protest he tells her to stfu and plops right on top of her so she can’t go nowhere.

☆ Ahhhhh yes omg thank you anon x

☆ Sorry it’s short ☹️

☆ Johnnie Guilbert X Reader

☆ Fluff

☆ If you are going to request: please check at the pinned post if requests are open,otherwise I will delete your requests which I have already been doing

☆ Creds to @cafekitsune for dividers :)

Masterlist | Pinned Post

“Pumpkin,come to bed.” Johnnie whispered as I shook my head, “I can’t,I have to finish these lyrics.” I whispered as I barely looked away from my computer screen.

“When will you come to bed? It’s already midnight.” He told me and I nodded my head, “I know,I’ll be in bed by one,I promise,but I really have to finish this.” I told him with a sigh.

“If you’re not in bed by one,I’m turning off your pc.” He told me jokingly and I giggled, “Sure.” I said lightheartedly with a smile.

I continued to write as Johnnie walked off to bed,I had to finish these lyrics because the deadline was in three days,I was already behind and if I didn’t get this posted to them I would be worse off.

The amount of emails I was getting about the deadline was finally getting to me,the pressure put on me was keeping me up at night.

Ironically enough it was a song about the love between two people.I’ve always loved Johnnie,since the moment I saw him,so the second I got the chance at a love song I took it.

I hummed a tune to myself,listening to the beat of a song and editing the lyrics to fit the best I could. I knew I would end up scrapping and editing a few lines but I didn’t mind,as long as I got a base for my writing.

“You’re my my my lover~” I sung softly to myself as I checked if the lyrics matched the beat.

It was the most ironic situation I’ve been placed in,Johnnie was always looking out for me,taking mental health days off with me and always making sure I got enough sleep,he was the perfect example for a boyfriend.

I hummed softly to myself as I mind mapped some feelings for the song,the best I got up to was :

•love

•kindness

•looking out for people

•Caring

This was before I realised I was writing a song about Johnnie essentially. I was listing everything Johnnie had done for me,past and present. Johnnie was the perfect model for any love song.

I sit there tapping my pen against my paper,slowly running out of ideas before I edit a few more words.

“This is our place.” I hum to myself and quickly edit the line before I forget to,I smile as I realise i have my own house with the person I love. The realisation pulling a smile into my face.

“Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?” I whisper as I read out the lyrics,humming the tune to myself. This had become a love song about Johnnie and no one would know,I laugh to myself at the actualisation.

And before I knew it the click of the clock on my laptop changed the time to 1am, “Hey sweetheart,I need you to come to bed please,this isn’t good for you.” Johnnie whispered standing in the doorframe.

“Five more minutes,” I say as I look up at him, “Please!” I whisper to him as I see the disapproval sat on his face. “Okay,but after that im gonna have to drag you to bed.” He laughs but I know he would probably do that.

I mean ; not literally but Johnnie would drag me kicking and screaming if that’s what he had to do to get me to snuggle up to him in bed and sleep.

I edit a few lyrics and words before resting my head on the desk for a brief moment. A brief moment then turns into Johnnie tapping my arm, “Love wake up,you can’t sleep here,come to bed.” He whispers lovingly.

“No I have to finish this.” I say quietly looking up at him, “No,you’re coming to bed come on.” He says as he picks me up by the waist,holding me up to his waist without a reaction.

“Okay.” I whisper quietly.Tiredly I rest my head on his shoulder as we walk into our shared room,i strip myself of my clothes and put on my Pyjamas before huddling up in bed next to Johnnie.

“I love you.” I whispered as I kiss his cheek, “I love you too,princess.” He whispers before I drift of back into sleep.

#spotify #smut #song #romance #cute #fluff #colby brock smut #sam and colby #sam and colby fluff #colby brock #jake and johnnie #johnnie guilbert fluff #johnnie guilbert smut #johnnie guilbert #johnnie guilbert x reader

[shock]

i went back to work last Monday for the first time after my surgery and then collapsed at work Thursday and since then have been unable to move or do even the most basic of things for myself and got told sunday by my immediate supervisor who I spent most of my time with that she has COVID which explains literally all of my symptoms 🫠 and I'm out of paid sick leave so im trying to go back and forth between my surgeons and admin while exhausted figuring out what to do. i haven't felt in a position to ask something like this in a long time but idk what else to do right now if anyone has something to spare to help me get through this week i would really be grateful here's my paypal

EDIT: I AM OKAY NOW THANK YOU THANK YOU

[ughgoaway]

we went to winter wonderland // day 2

content warnings; swearing maybe? I think that's it??

a/n; day 2!!! I have only been to Winter Wonderland like once, so if this is inaccurate... oops! but I did have a good time despite it being a bit shit, which is how I felt writing this fic too lol. also I did use a quote in here I saw online, but I can not for the life of me find who wrote it, as soon as I do, I will edit this and credit them!!! <3

word count; 2k

(this fic takes place pre-relationship)

12 days masterlist

✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿

“Alexa! Play Daddy's song!!” Matty hears his daughter shouting at the Alexa from the kitchen. He smirks to himself once he understands what she means.

Matty was careful what songs he showed Annie, knowing she was at the age of endless questions, and he didn't exactly feel like explaining the intricacies of some of his songs. 

But last week, Matty had to run into a meeting and left Annie in the studio with Ross and George. As they sat there and planned the setlist, any time Annie heard the title of a song she didn't know, she would pipe up and say, “What does that one sound like?” and either George or Ross would play a small bit of the song. When Me and You Together song was brought up, they thought it was about as harmless as 75 songs can get, so they played the whole song for her.

They watched her eyes light up as the song played, and by the end, she was dancing around the room with them both and singing along, but once it stopped, she asked for it again. And again. And again. Now it was a week later, and Matty was sick of the sound of his own voice, which is not something he thought was possible.

As Matty strolls into the front room to see Annie looking grumpy at the Alexa for not understanding her request, he scoops her up and sits on the sofa with her on his lap. She shrieks as he picks her up and crosses her arms over her chest once she's sat down. 

“Annie, sweetheart, im so glad you like my song, but im not sure we need to listen to it again,” Matty says gently, trying not to upset his daughter. Annie huffs in his lap and immediately pouts, and it almost breaks him. But he manages to stay strong. 

“Why don't we do something else instead, hmm? You could show me some of your new toys? We can even play Barbies if you like?” Matty says, trying to bargain with Annie. He wasn't very good at the whole discipline side of parenting. But how could he be when Annie gives him those puppy dog eyes and a shaky bottom lip?

But before either of those comes out, her face lights up with an idea, and Matty knows that doesn't bode well. “Okay, we can stop listening to my most favourite song if we can go to Winter Wonderland like it says!!” Annie says, stressing most favourite in an attempt to guilt trip her dad, and it works.

They had gone to Winter Wonderland last year, and Annie had the time of her life. Some of the kiddy rides made Matty feel his age though, and after a 3rd go on the teacups, he had to sit stationary for a good 15 minutes. Despite that, that day was one of Matty's favourite days with Annie, seeing her face brighten at the rides and all the people, watching her sit on Santa's lap and ask him for a new dog, “my doggy mayhem needs a friend!!” but nothing compared to their trip on the Ferris wheel. 

Watching the skyline of London reflect in her eyes was a sight Matty would never forget, her giddiness as she tried to spot their house (she insisted she found it, and who is Matty to disagree?) and the different colours of light slide over her ecstatic face. The purple and pink lights shining in her wide eyes as she stared at the people below giggling was the highlight of his Christmas. 

Annie sat on his lap as they went down on the wheel, and before they even reached the bottom, she was fast asleep in his arms. Watching her eyes flutter on the train home made Matty's heart swell in a new way. He didn't think he could love something this much.

So when she asked, Matty couldn't help but nod his head and get attacked with hugs and squeals.

////////////////////

The sun had gone down about 20 minutes ago, and Annie was determined it was now time to go on the Ferris wheel, “I need to see all the pretty lights, Daddy!” she says, dragging Matty over to the queue.

Matty laughed and followed behind her. A giant stuffed bear obstructed his view slightly, but he blindly trusted Annie's directions. After a long day of rides and fairground games, Matty wouldn't mind a gentle spin around the Ferris wheel.

Little did he know you were thinking the exact same thing, only a few people ahead of him in the queue. 

You hadn't planned to go to Winter Wonderland that day, not even thinking about it before you were in central London. But on the tube, you saw a poster and suddenly felt drawn to it. The hustle and bustle of people and the decorations were sure to make you feel a bit less shit. 

You couldn't go to Christmas at home this year, not being able to travel due to severe weather warnings, so you went up to your mum's house a few weeks before for an early Christmas dinner. It sounded like a good idea at the time, but how wrong you were.

The whole family was invited, and you were inundated with questions about a significant other, “Oh do you have a boyfriend yet love?”

And then, having to cope with the sad eyes and the pity after you say no, “Oh don't worry, sweetheart. It'll happen for you eventually.” 

They all said the same thing, pity followed by an attempted set-up, “Actually… if you're still single, there's a lovely young man I work with that would be perfect for you!” 

And thus the spiel began, describing a man who you're sure is nice enough but definitely wasn't perfect for you. Even if he was, you couldn't date right now anyway. You were well and truly stuck on Matty.

You can't think of anyone else. Your head is full of him. Your heart is full of him. You think of him when you wake up, what he's doing right now. Whether he's making breakfast for Annie, or maybe if he's at the studio already. Throughout the day, small things remind you of him. The guitar that sits in the corner of your room, an abandoned attempt at a hobby, now sat as nothing but a reminder of the man you were violently in love with. You turned on the radio each day to distract yourself, but now something as basic as music has you yearning for him. One day, as you were getting ready to go out, one of his songs came on, and you froze on the spot. You didn't end up going out that day. You stayed home and ached over a man who you could never have. 

The worst time was at night. You lay in bed staring at the ceiling, the ticking of the clock teasing you. Reminding you that each minute you don't sleep translates to an hour of grumpiness tomorrow morning. But you couldn't help it. Your mind was swimming in him. You thought of lying in bed together, chatting, and giggling. And falling asleep in his arms. You'd be able to listen to his heartbeat rather than the tick tok of that fucking clock.

So you lie, you say to your aunts, “Oh I don't need romance! Im perfectly happy.” But you say you don't need love like a woman on a diet says she doesn't want dessert, you long for it but you don't think you deserve it. 

To try and distract yourself, you dragged yourself out of bed and into central London. The poster convinced you, and soon enough, you were standing in front of Hyde Park with a ticket booked. 

For a solo adult, you had a pretty fun day, going around to all the stalls and buying unnecessary treats for you and your loved ones. You ate some overpriced food and went on a few rides. But you were waiting until the sun had set for your favourite activity, the Ferris wheel. 

You get loaded onto a carriage, and you hear the ride operator ushering more people on saying, “There's only one in here so you two can join her, okay?” You keep focused on the view outside, not too worried about who you're going to be spending the trip around with.

That was until the door shut, and you heard a breathy voice say, “Hi.” 

Why do you recognise that voice? Oh- OH. you turn, and you're met with the same pair of eyes that run through your mind all night, the same eyes that seem to follow you wherever you go.

A few hard blinks later, you assure yourself you're not dreaming, that is Matty Healy standing in front of you with a bear almost the same size as his daughter.

Speaking of his daughter, you catch her in your arms moments later, Annie had thrown herself in to hug you; clearly over the moon with your presence.

“Well hi guys!” You say, somehow managing to keep your voice even, “So nice to see you both” Your eyes flick from Annie's up to Matty, who simply nods, dumbfounded. 

You make a slightly awkward conversation with the two of them, both you and Matty reeling from the surprise encounter. But Annie wasn't phased, easily recounting her whole day to you and laughing when she detailed how ill Matty got on the teacups. 

“In my defence,” Matty says, already smiling at your poorly suppressed giggles, “they spin really fast, okay! Im getting too old for teacups,” he says with a flick of his hand.

Just as you say, “No!” Annie says, “Yes! Too olddddd” dragging out the last letter. All of you burst out laughing, Matty gives Annie a pinch and calls her cheeky.

Once you reached the top, you, Matty, and Annie all quieted down and stared out at the view, all immersed in the London skyline sparkling back at you. Annie stood below you with her face pressed into the window as you and Matty had a quiet conversation. 

“I always wait until it's dark to come up here, I love the lights too much to come up during the day” you whisper to Matty.

You don't turn your head to face him until the silence is too much, and you almost jump when you see him already looking at you. 

But all Matty wanted to do was look at you. The way the lights glittered in your eyes, your smile as they flicked over the view. The way you squinted and leaned in closer, trying to figure out what landmark you were looking at. He especially loved the way your hand was subconsciously stroking Annie's back the whole time. 

He felt like a real fucking family. And god, it hurt. 

Nevertheless, he couldn't stop staring at you, willing to endure any pain if it meant he could continue living in this delusion he had created. 

Any beautiful view was lost on the two of you now, just staring at each other with dopey smiles on your faces. Tracing each feature with your eyes, desperate to memorise this. To live it over and over again. 

Annie tugged at her dad's leg, and that finally pulled his attention back. You were nearly at the bottom of the wheel, and Annie's eyes were heavy with sleep. She rubbed at her face with closed fists and then stuck her arms up. Matty immediately scooped her up and held her close, letting her eyes shut and resting her head on his shoulder. She was falling asleep in a matter of seconds.

Neither of you spoke on the small remainder of the journey, not wanting to wake her up. But as he walked off trying to balance both Annie and the bear, Matty gave you a small smile and a wave. You did the same and walked in the opposite direction.

That night, it wasn't just you staring at your ceiling. Matty was up until 3 am watching the moonlight dance and fantasising about the life he had for 10 minutes. A life with you.

#christmas75 #matty healy #matty healy fanfiction #matty healy fic #matty healy fluff #matty healy x you #matty healy x reader #the 1975 fic #teacher au! #i am unsure about this fic but thats not a new development #m&yts remains one of their best songs

[ventishipwindows]

Emotional Support Wisps

Tags: Established relationship (Venti x gn!reader), sick reader, wind wisps comforting u bc venti isn't there for like half of it, mild emetophobia warning (just a mention), NOT beta read, or edited at all tbh, im bad at tagging sorry

Author's Notes: uh yea this has been sitting in my drafts for a couple days, it's self-indulgent bullshit bc i had a massive headache the other day but. idk someone can enjoy this maybe??

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Venti had known something was wrong first. He'd seen it in your eyes, that little glimmer of pain behind them you'd refused to acknowledge. He'd offered to stay home to keep any eye on you if you weren't feeling good, concerned you might be coming down with something. 

You had waved it off, told him you were fine. Said it was just a little headache, nothing too big to worry about.

You were regretting that now. That tiny inkling of a headache had evolved into an agonizing migraine. You'd pulled the curtains to your window closed, put a blanket over your eyes to keep the light out, and laid down in bed waiting for it to pass. 

Time seemed to crawl on, that splitting pain in your head seeming to do nothing more than continue, and it only worsened when your stomach started to churn with nausea. It was almost enough to push you to try and use the wind to get Venti's attention, but you knew he was probably still performing right now, and decided not to bother him.

However, even though you didn't call out to him directly, he had a sense something was off. He always could tell when something was wrong with you, his beloved Windblume, and he knew it was worse than you'd let on. Not that he could just leave mid-performance - not without you chewing him out and saying it wasn't that serious - but he could send a few... little friends to try and help in his place. He was sure they'd be convinced quite easily if he offered them a few apples afterwards. 

And so, even with your eyes covered by that blanket, you could feel a few tiny bodies snuggling up to you. You recognized the little inquisitive chirps instantly - wind wisps. They must have snuck in through the open window. You'd seen them with Venti before, but never gotten  quite close enough to touch one before.

Their bodies were soft, almost velvety to the touch, and their little wings fluttered gently as they chirped again. One of them seemed to be right beside your head, using its feathered wings to blow a breeze at you. It seemed to hit the exact spot where the pain was the worst, and the breeze was just cool enough to give you a bit of relief. 

One of them curled up on your chest, and another pressed its little face against your cheek as if to reassure you. You didn't need words for you to understand what the wisps were telling you - that you'd be okay, that this would pass and they'd be here for you.

You reached out very carefully to touch the one pressed against your cheek, gently stroking its little head. It made a cheerful little tinkling noise that reminded you of a wind-chime, softly brushing the feathers of its wings against your palm. 

The wisps were right. Eventually the pain in your head seemed to ease, and that awful twisting nausea in your stomach seemed to dissipate as well. Just enough that you felt like you could fall asleep, and hope that when you woke up, you'd feel better. 

The wisps didn't seem to mind that idea, and as if they read your mind seemed to press closer to you in encouragement. They seemed to be telling you to sleep, that you needed to rest to feel better. They even started to make quiet noises, like tiny little purrs, to soothe you more.

Eventually, with the wisps' soft bodies pressed up against you, you couldn't help but close your eyes fully and let yourself drift off to sleep. The wisps were there, a comforting presence that made you feel safe, and even loved, somehow. You wondered briefly if Venti would be home by the time you woke up from your nap. 

.o.O.o.

You're woken up by a soft kiss on the forehead. Just a gentle brush of lips against your skin, barely enough to wake you from your sleep and get you to open your eyes.

When you do open your own eyes, a familiar pair of green ones is looking down at you. Venti is back, sitting on the bed beside you and looking down at both you and the wisps sleeping beside you with a gentle smile.

"Are you feeling any better, Windblume?" He asks, quietly, as if he's worried being too loud will make the headache return.

You don't want to sit up just yet - the wisps look so peaceful, and it feels wrong to wake them. But you look up at him, and you realize that you do feel much better now. Like the migraine from before was nothing more than a bad dream - and maybe you'd assume it was, if not for the tiny little bodies curled up beside you. 

"Did you send the wisps to check on me?" You ask him, your voice a little quieter than usual, too - probably because you just woke up. 

A hint of a blush colors his cheeks, and he laughs quietly before responding with, "Well, I couldn't leave you all alone when you were in pain, could I?"

You can't help but smile at that, carefully sitting up to try and disturb the wisps as little as possible before planting a kiss on his cheek. "They did a very good job at making me feel better."

His blush darkened at the kiss on his cheek, although he met your smile with one of his own. "I was hoping they could, at least until I got home." And with that, he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into a hug - and dislodging the wisps, who chirped in protest before snuggling back up to you two and promptly resuming their naps.

You couldn't help but relax into the hug, too, resting your head on Venti's chest as he began to gently stroke your hair, twirling a few strands around his slender fingers.

"You can rest a little longer, Windblume. I'll be here to watch over you." 

#genshin impact #genshin venti #venti x reader #wind wisps #writing #my writing :>

[winterwallacehenderson]

SEVENTEEN members as songs from ttpd (from the first drop)

s.coups- i can do it with a broken heart

starting off slightly sad but he’s a real tough kid and he can definitely handle anything.

i think I saw an edit of him somewhere to this and cried

i’m seriously so proud of him always

taylor did write this for all the eldest daughters/ siblings

just super coups coded

jeonghan- fortnight ft. post malone

“your wife waters flowers i want to kill her” peak jeonghan vibes. he would commit a crime for funsies <3

also “i love you, it’s ruining my life” because man did he def ruin my life

tell me one jeonghan fan who’s mentally stable, we’re all a little crazy (myself included)

insanity and everything packed in one fr

joshua- fresh out the slammer

HE IS THE PRETTIEST BABY EVER OKAY

i too would go to jail for him

i’d also never lose my baby again

honestly him and jeonghan are both interchangeable, they’re both pretty and insane

OH! and i’d also disappear for a glimpse of his smile like fr fr my joshy :((((

jun- the tortured poets department

who’s gonna know him and love him if not me??

we’re also modern idiots and slightly crazy

OH! also the bridge is so junnie coded like honestly anything he does makes me feel like my heart will explode so

junnie is everything in this song minus the tats and drugs he's my precious boy <3

hoshi- but daddy i love him

the way i’d actually scream this song for him

also the vibes are so hoshi like im 90% sure he’d vibe with this song so hard

especially when she says "im having his baby no im not" he's ijboling right then and there

idk man it’s just so hoshi and i would definitely fight my dad for him

wonwoo- loml

he is actually so loml coded

like soft, played in a piano kind vibes

especially nana tour wonu

just very soft

he’s the love of my life and loss of my life as well because there’s actually no man that’s ever gonna be like him, ruined men for me

woozi- down bad

are we like actually surprised tho? that's my fav song and he is my fav boy

this man is literally so down bad coded

i’ve been singing and thinking of him like fuck it if I can’t have him, but i will definitely die not like tis gonna make a difference

IM LIKE SO IN LOVE WITH HIM OH MY GOD

also crying at the gym = lee jihoon (in reference to that one t-shirt he wore during caratland 2023)

minghao- so long, london

not the lyrical but mostly the vibes

this song is kinda calming to me in a way and it feels so hao like

also it reminds me hai cheng in a way maybe because of all the ship metaphors

i also feel like he’s appreciated the sadness in this song

he has that certain same whimsy as this song

mingyu- guilty as sin?

GUILTY AS SIN IS HIS SONG OKAY?!?!?

I WILL CHOOSE HIM AND ME RELIGIOUSLY ANYDAY

physically feeling sick how that bridge is literally so mingyu coded like holy fuck like gonna crucify me anyways? the way you hold me is actually what's holy??? its literally him

truly the best way to die is loving him

okay i’ll stop here before I die, he is just so <3

dokyeom- who’s afraid of little old me?

simply because he is such a nice person and such a lovely soul i worry people might take him for granted

the industry does not give him enough credit for him vocals like they should be scared of him he can eat up any vocalist in seconds

like they should be afraid of him that he's so goofy and silly

also the musical vibes here truly a kyeomie song

seungkwan- the alchemy

ALL THOSE SPORTS REFERENCE ARE FOR HIM!!!

my babiest boy ever

“where’s the trophy? he just comes running over to me” I CANNOT PUT ENOUGH EMPHASIS HOW SEUNGKWAN THIS IS

my heart will truly always be reserved for him

also he did make the strongest comeback fr

vernon- florida!!!

honestly, vernon’s favourite song here would be florida like fr

it’s just so vernon

he’d like eat up the featured and the beat right when she screams florida!!!!

13/10 would plan a trip to florida and brag how he's been to two places wtny and florida

the vibes are just so vernon fr idk what else to say

dino- clara bow

future of kpop, need I say more?

he’s like all the past legends but more better?

kinda like how she talks about it in the song, with the next being slightly better than the previous and yk what they've been through and stuff

and how dino is also called the future of kpop because he's so amazing

“the future’s bright, dazzling” so real like that’s literally about the future of kpop

anyways that's my take <33 I might do a part 2 with the second drop songs (no promises!!)

you can also find this thread on my twt here.

#seventeen #seventeen imagines #wintersrants #ttpd #taylor swift #svt as songs #svt #svt scoups #svt jeonghan #svt Joshua #svt jun #svt hoshi #svt wonwoo #svt woozi #svt minghao #svt the 8 #svt mingyu #svt dk #svt dokyeom #svt seungkwan #svt vernon #svt dino #svt imagines #seventeen fluff #kpop #scoups #jeonghan #joshua #jun #hoshi

[blackheart-6]

noelle holiday age progression chart

without height lines

explanations of designs:

hi yall

so, i actually finished this drawing like a week ago lol. but i didnt want to post a bunch of drawing in a row, and then i got sick, so i havent been able to post it till now!

its my imaginings of what noelle looked like as she grew up, and a potential adult noelle design! ill explain my thought processes about these designs below, if anyones interested 😁

i also plan on doing one of these with dess, but this one was pretty difficult, so it might be awhile before that (unless yalls are interested in seeing it?)

first off, im not 100% sure ill keep using all these designs. some of them im not that happy with (im no good at designing outfits 😔) but i just went with them so i could finish the drawing. so if anyone has any alternative outfit ideas for any of her ages, id be interested in seeing/hearing it!

secondly, something that may stick out to yall for all the designs is how tall she gets. its the same height i normally draw her with, but given how i usually draw her by herself you cant really tell how tall she is! i have 3 main reasons for why i headcanon her as this tall: deer are pretty tall irl, so having her be tall makes sense in my head; i just like the look of her being super tall, it makes me happy lol; and third, i personally also headcanon the holiday family as boss monsters (i think ive explained this headcanon before on here, so i wont explain again, unless someone is interested ^^). so yeah, she ends up being 7 feet tall as an adult, the second tallest in her family!

also, i gave all her children forms stripes in some way, as a reference to when monster kid in undertale says they can tell frisk is a kid because of their stripes!

now onto my explainations for individual drawings!

theres nothing really to say about her baby design. the only thing i did that might be new is give her faun spots! they are most plentiful on her baby form, but they persist until shes in her teens, i would say (on here you cant see them after age 7, but thats just because i imagine they are mostly on her back). and i gave her a cute lil onsie that says a-deer-able! if you guys cant read it ^^

this outfit i made for her toddler design is actually an outfit ive used in the past! i wonder if yall know what drawing it was? its pretty much the same as it was there, i just added a stripe to the shirt. i felt like overalls are so reminiscent of childhood, i had to give at least one of her designs them! i also added a little mistletoe to the front pocket, to make it more christmas-esque. and i gave her some bandaids, just cause.

7 years old is one of the designs i really struggled on, and im still not happy with it. i dunno if ive said this yet, but i headcanon noelle to be trans, so at 7 is when i decided she started realizing it. so here i gave her long sleeves and pants, to show how shes more hidden now because shes unhappy with herself, if that makes any sense? i was also trying to make her look a bit like a nerd, with the button up and khakis, just because its funny. but yeah, ill probably end up changing this design at some point :P

11 years old was one of the easiest to do, considering how ive had her design for this age for awhile lol. one thing i did change was going from 2 red/white stripes to one, but ive done that before, so it wasnt something entirely new. i also gave her a smile and closed eyes, cause shes happy being a girl 🥰. other that that, its the same, so yeah, thats it for this part

okay, this next design is a fairly different looking one than all the rest, but i have my reasons! at this point in noelles live, dess has gone missing, so i wanted to show her being sad and stuff. i also gave her shoes and long sleeves because she probably goes out looking for dess when she can, hoping to find a lead 😭. but outside of in-story stuff, this outfit is based off of an old one i drew, but its fairly edited, so i wouldnt be surprised if no one recognizes it even if they have seen my old stuff. she has straight hair here, to show how unhappy she is (idk what it is about straight hair it just feels sad) and because i wanted to give her different hair varieties on this progression chart. i gave her antlers 2 prongs each at this point, because the way i see deer monsters, their antlers show their growth/aging, so youll see them getting bigger and having more prongs as the chart continues.

this outfit for 15 is another one i dont like. i tried to make it similar to her current outfit, but still pretty different. im not even sure what precisely i dont like about this outfit, it just doesnt feel that good. for this one i gave her leg warmers because i used to (and sometimes still do) draw her normal outfit with them. i gave her the curly hair she has as a callback to when i used to draw her hair like that! but yeah, ill probably end up redoing this one too

for 17, i just gave her the normal outfit, so it was easy ^^. in game i think shes 16, but close to turning 17, so i just went with 17 here to fit the +2 age pattern thing i had going on. i also gave her an extra horn prong than i normally give her, just to show age once again

finally, her adult design! i dont like this one either lol. i spent so long trying to think of what outfit to give her, but i couldnt come up with something i liked >.< so i just gave her something simple. i feel like once noelle graduates high school and probably goes to college she branches out more and tries things her mother never let her do, which is why i gave her an outfit like that, that has a crop top and a shorter skirt. also, yalls might recognize the hair style i gave her, i drew a potential adult noelle before and i gave her the same hair ^^

i think thats all for the post! i probably have more thoughts that im just not thinking of, but its fine for now. i hope yall enjoyed the drawing, and if you have any question or comments or whatever, go ahead and say them!! if youve made it this far, have a cookie, you must be hungry after reading so much ^^ 🍪

#art #my art #digital art #deltarune #noelle holiday #deltarune noelle #age chart #age progression chart #progression chart #finally did this #(i mentioned doing it awhile ago) #im kinda mixed on my feelings about this #but if yalls wanna know about that i talk all out it! #this took forever lol #also #trans #transgender #trans noelle #gotta love transbian noelle ^^

[vampsturns]

𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐭 (𝐩𝐭 :𝟏)⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

╔═══════☆♡☆═══════╗

𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 : ̗̀➛ you see matt at a party he continues to stare at you in your dress as you are with your friends out trying to finally get out after your nasty break up when he came trying to flirt with you and knowing what was going to happen you try shutting him down...

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬! : ̗̀➛ flirting, talking abt sexual content, talking about alcohol (matt!angry of rejection reader!shutting down) ending a little smut no real sex, no use of y/n (name will be vivian☺️) MATTS ABLE TO DRINK IN THIS STORY

𝐩𝐞𝐲𝐭𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐬! : ̗̀➛ this is my first story so i'll try my best n yes there will be a part 2 cause i'm mean☺️ (THE PART 2 WILL HAVE SMUT CAUSE IM VERY NICE) but don't judge cause i thought of this so randomly🙉 i watched an edit n though of this☺️ (here is the edit) go on with the story....

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i walk into the party getting a full whiff of alcohol and smoke making me cough "cmon girl" i heard my friend say gripping into my hand pulling me with her "where are we going?" i asked through waving my hand trying to move the smoke to see better as she pulls me to the table of alcohol

"girl you need to loosen up! have some of this" she said to me pouring some type of alcohol into a cup passing it to me after and pouring herself some "what the hell is this?" i said swirling the cup looking at the drink "probably some vodka cmon try it!"

i swallow my saliva hard a bit scared but ready as i grip on my red solo cup "shot it!" she half yelled at me as i get sick of her hurrying and just downed it making my throat some what burn "yes girl!" she said making the end of yes come out longer as she chugged her vodka

she cheers as music blasts and body's all around the room dance some on the couch dry humping eachother making me gag a bit as i know most of the people around me are drunk "get me another shot i do not need to remember this tomorrow" i said earning a giggle from her as she pours us another shot i look around most people making out walking into rooms for privacy most drinking and dancing

"vivian? hey!" i hear my friend nina day before waving her hand in my face "girl you totally just zoned out" she says hee hand out giving me my cup i fully down the shot a slight burning sensation in my throat as i go to the table to find a soda or something "hey girl i'm gonna go dance meet me over there" she says before running off

i find a can of sprite opening it "thank god" i say under my breath turning around to look for nina through the crowd i sip on my sprite walking around looking for her, not long until i find her dancing crazy i walk over giggling as she slurs her words "you won't guess what happened"

she says as i nod my head towards her telling her to contine "some guys just bought me shots and we just danced!" she giggled as i rolled my eyes "he was really hott" she said before stumbling getting back up and dancing like nothing had happened she was right when she said she was a weird drunk

"come dance!" she yelled as the speakers blasted in our ears as we both danced "this party's an okay fun right?" i ask her as she just nods before take a hint started blasting on the speakers causing her to gasp "holy shit this is my favorite song!" she says she she starts to twirl as i slightly dance to the beat

in the corner of my eye i can see a man staring at me as he walks over to me slowly i ignore him and continue to dance with nina "hey" he said to me as the first words of the song "𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐚𝐦 𝐢 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐬 𝐢 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞" start to play i rolled my eyes as that's quite my situation but this guys was a bit hot his hair was fluffed out he was in a brown and beige shirt with brown cargo pants his hands in his pockets i look to my side to see nina is gone as i look back at him

"hi" i say awkwardly fidgeting with my fingers as i look behind the boy to see nina kissing some random guys making me roll my eyes and go back to looking the guy "sorry but have we met?" he says as he grabs my hand a bit "heh.. i don't think so" i say knowing where this is going... sex.

"let me introduce myself.... i'm matthew but call me matt hm?" he said getting close to me i felt as my dress was getting tighter my legs a bit shaky and my hands sweaty as his hand make their way through my arms "vivian but some people call me vivi.." i said stuttering in between words his hands land on my hips making mini circles around the area "im sorry but im not really looking for this right now.." i say trying to back up as he pulls me back in.

"cmon sweetheart a little play won't hurt" his hands start moving towards my thighs my face so close i smell the alcohol in his breath "i'm serious i don't want sex" i say pushing him away i look at his eyes go from my pushed up tits in my dress to my eyes "get a fucking mint fuckface" i say showing up the middle finger on my right hand moving to the kitchen

i scoff as i walk to the counter seeing a couple beers stacked and some packed in the boxes i grab a beer and quickly open it up looking at the beer as my fingers fidget with the coldness of the bottle "corona" it said in bold letters i look over at the party as i take a sip of my beer seeing matt as he says dancing with another girl which made me roll my eyes

"fucking bitch" i huff under my breath as i see him lock eyes with me

i hear people quickly walk in the kitchen which make my head quickly move to see a bunch of guys in girls most drunk getting beers and shots i couldn't hear their conversations but one stood out to me a guy blackish brown hair in jeans and white shirt opening a beer quickly before sipping it.

we both ended up locking eyes as he started to walk to stand next to me i could tell matt was still watching me from the corner of my eye which weirded me out as the guy next to me started small talk "hey how you liking the party?" he asked me which made me tilt my head towards him "it's okay i'm not really that into party's my friend forced me here" i say chuckling

"you look great by the way.. my names brandon yours?" he said making me blush a bit "vivian" i said looking at him as he leaned a bit towards me "what about you how are you liking the party?" i asked "pretty good" he said before moving in front of me "by any chance you got a boyfriend?" shit.

"no we broke up a few weeks ago-" i barley got my words out before his beer was on the counter and his arms were wrapped around my hips which startled me i felt a warm sensation on my neck which made me shiver was this guy drunk or something?! he was hot and all but why am i letting him do this after i rejected that one guy

his hands were roaming my body most of his friends had left only one or two stayed which made us all alone my hands went to his hair but what about the one guy what was his name... matt!

holy fuck were my only thoughts when the guy that was on me a few seconds ago got punched "matt?!" i yelled as i look at brandon wiping away the blood on his lip "what the fuck is up with you dude?" he yelled towards matt who had grabbed me tightly and kept me by his side "man fuck this" brandon yelled as he walked off grabbing his beer on his way

"what the-" i say as i look towards matt cut off as matt had just slapped my cheek my eyes widened as i looked at him "what is your problem i'm not even your girlfriend?" i yell as he grabs my hips and moves me towards the fridge "how was he huh?" he growled his grip getting tighter "i wasn't gonna have sex with him i said i don't want sex!" i yell trying to push him off of me

matt started to kiss on my neck harder than brandon had making me gasp i don't know but this had felt much better than brandon which confused me "you only want me for sex u fucker" as much as i wanted to have sex with someone i wasn't gonna give my pride for a one night stand i tried my best trying to get out of his grip as i just let it happen

i felt his lips move up my neck as his hands moved down my hips.. this was kinda hot to me but i don't understand how i barley like this guy but if i was gonna have a one night stand it's him.

"fuck" i slightly whimpered squeezing my thighs as matt's actions were getting me wetter than i imagined "you like this huh?" he said in between kisses before letting his hands go from my thighs to my panties which were drenched "all this just cause i gave you a couple kisses" he said as i moaned under his touch

i couldn't believe i was about to let this man have sex with me but her i am a moaning mess under him and i had no shame

"please" i moaned as he rubbed my inner thigh "please what" he teased smirking as he looked into my eyes "please just fuck me" i say letting my head land on the fridge door "come on" he said gripping my hand pulling me from my horny trance and speed running through the crowd to upstairs "where are we going" i say before i was thrown into a room "don't worry about it" he said before closing the door quickly and locking it

i was really about to have sex with this man...

𝐩𝐞𝐲𝐭𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐬! : ̗̀➛ i kinda hate this but if you do want a part 2 just let me know cause i got some ideas but here's my first story☺️

#Spotify #chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo smut #sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x reader #sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo x you

[rileyclaw]

Hii! First off i just want to I'm such a big fan of your art and animatics! Your art is just so expressive and unique its addicting to look at 💞💞

I was wondering if you could go over how your process or tutorial in making an animatic? Whenever I try to start to make one, I get jumbled up and end up ditching it lol

I'm sorry if you get this question a lot 😭

So sorry it took me so long to answer this- I was in a Busy time (diseaseridden with covid and being punched by finals) when I got the ask and wanted to answer it with some stuff Im using for my next TOH animatic!!

I'll say one thing first: I get jumbled up and ditch so many animatics. For every one animatic I release, there are three to five more I have that have NEVER seen the light of day (yet). And that's okay!! It's fun just to make them for me, and I hope it is for you too!! Animatics are scary because if you're working on it alone, it can be really hard to be your own cheerleader to keep up the mojo to keep going. So that makes it really special when there is that project that makes it to the finish line- cuz you can look at it and go "holy crap I made this. holy crap i MADE that look how SICK that is dude!! all that work and look at the turnout!!"

The following stuffh is just my personal process and is by no means representative of a professional animation pipeline, but this works for me as a Lonely Artist! It all begins with the idea - whether it's a song, or just a story you wanna tell. In the case of the one I'm gonna demo here with , I wanted to animate Hunter's first day as Del's apprentice!

The first thing I did was write a script. Not fancy or AO3-quality, but enough that I understand the pacing and the visuals of each shot. I usually just put this in a doc or put it in a script format, if I feel fancy.

Then, I take that script and find music that I think would fit for it- and remix it (if needed) to fit the pacing/mood/etc! This is what this new animatic looked like before I began ANY artwork- this is a me thing because I'm super inspired by audio as opposed to visuals first. But you might be different- this is just how I like working personally!

Then begins the research! I find references for characters, background layouts, and create a style guide for the animatic that tells me how thick lines will be for characters, backgrounds, if there'll be tons of value or no. I make a turnaround for each character so I can refer to them because Im gonna be drawing them over and over a LOT and want to be consistent! Luckily TOH has no shortage of references, so I based my work off them.

THEN, I can begin drawing. I'm a little,,, (a lot) ADHD and may not always do this process, but if you're new to animatics or daunted by the task at hand, make beat boards of the entire project.

This is just a page of rough thumbnails that get your visual idea down - look how rough and quick these are!! I try not to spend over a minute on each beat board if I dont have to, unless it's a particularly complex shot.

When it gets to the stage where you're ready to begin the actual scenes, I personally tend to do backgrounds first because I like to set characters into backgrounds - and for every animatic, I have the Awkward Blue Sketch Stage which is basically my beat boards timed out as an animatic.

I used Storyboard Pro for this (Toonboom, not free ): icky), but the process can be replicated across most art platforms in whichever way you feel most comfy with! This is so I can time the drawings before I devote time cleaning them up-- which can make for some Pretty Funny looking little guys but theyre important!! trust!!

Once a big sequence of shots is cleaned up (I usually do 40-60 second chunks at a time), I export the .mov and send it to my editing program (which in this case is still Premiere Pro) - and then repeat this process again and again until.. it's done??

Here's like a TL;DR list of basically everything I said summed up:

• Make a loose script or bulletin of the idea! Do your research!

• Depending on what kind of animatic you're making, time it to music!

• Make a beat board of very loose gestures for your shots, and time them - then move on to refinement & cleanup!

• Combine all shots, refine music cues and timings, add any last needed VFX, and export!

There's no secret recipe or anything, it's just learning a pipeline that best suits you, whether it is for something professional or something you want to make for fun because you just love to make!!

#riley talks #long post #SORRY ITS LONG but i couldnt just put a bulletin list like “this is the ONLY method that works” bc thats not true!!! #everyone works diferently especially artists #and this is just my specific method of working #im very fortunate to have programs that make animatic-making a little easier #so i hope whoever wishes to make one in the future finds something that works well for them!! i have a blast making storyboards/animatics!! #text post #ask #tutorial #idk how to tag this lol

[scoops404]

Writing a Scoops Fic

With Scoops. Featuring: Scoops.

This will get long, so it's under the cut. And it will contain spoilers for the fic, which kinda seem obvious, but alas.

Lol okay, when an initial idea hits me, I usually send it out into the universe to see if it's a good idea (sometimes in private DMs and sometimes I'll tweet it). This idea struck me yesterday when I was watching my niece and nephew and my dad off-handedly mentioned the show "I didn't know I was pregnant" (i'm staying with my parents while my apartment is being renovated and I'm slowly dying)

Here's the idea:

I tweeted this idea out to my private twitter at 5:22pm yesterday and then all my friends slowly exploded. The more I think about it, the more i think Mario anon might have done something similar (they've covered pretty much all the mpreg tropes but are usually sfw and established relationship). So, to make this idea my own, it'll be nsfw (hi, hello, it's me. And that's like the super fun part about writing this idea) and not established relationship - friends with benefits immediately makes this situation even more complicated. I'm in.

There's no time or energy to write last night so I stewed on the idea and when I got to work this morning I made myself focus on my novel writing (that should be the priority but im currently stuck). And wrote some then. But for on my lunch break, I thought, why not? Let's see what comes out. I talked with my friends at work for like thirty minutes and then wrote 828 words. I'm going to share all of those words with you at the end. This is very vulnerable for me because I'm purposefully not going to clean them up or edit, just show you what I've raw dogged. ((to be fair, though, i think the opening line is like banging))

Then, on my drive home, I thought about it more and more and most of the plot materialized in my head. As of now, I can picture two scenes really clearly, and that's enough to build a long fic or even a long one shot out of. (I also did this with There's Hope Out the Window)

The first scene is the one you're about to read. The second scene is George waking up in the hospital with Dream next to him, calmly explaining he had to have emergency surgery, and their baby is too little and might not make it. Lots of Drama. The idea of one of those fireplace blowy things that looks like an accordion came to me and George feeling like someone used one of those and blew love into him until he was sick with it -- that's how much he immediately loves his baby. It's a boy. He has to stay in NICU for weeks and the drama will unfold from there.

#writing a fic with scoops

[cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut]

Big thanks to @thisbuildinghasfeelings @three-drink-amy @sznofthesticks @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad @paperstorm @heartstringsduet @lemonlyman-dotcom @whatsintheboxmh @carlos-in-glasses @jesuisici33 @bonheur-cafe @herefortarlos @fitzherbertssmolder @theghostofashton for the tags. As I work my way slowly through the edit of First Time After, here’s a small snippet that’s been ever so slightly altered!

Nothing makes sense anymore. It’s like opening his phone and having forgotten, overnight, how to read. It’s like peering out of the windows of his home and suddenly having no idea how to get to work from here, how to navigate the kind of daylight in which people might see him, interact with him. He doesn’t even think he could handle ordering coffee right now. His mother drank raspberry tea in his and Carlos’s favourite coffeeshop, and asked them if they thought the barista, middle aged and greying with grace, was handsome. TK had scoffed, but Carlos had smiled, quietly delighted, and glanced over his shoulder to appraise the man in response. It felt light, like it mattered, like it didn’t. He remembers the booth in which they sat together, wonders if he’ll ever be able to sit there again. He curls the fingers of his dominant hand too tightly around the other. Two knuckles on his right hand crack from the force of it, and he catches the way Carlos frowns, ducks his head in search of TK’s gaze. TK glances up quickly, and then looks back down at his fingers.

He edges slowly into the outermost dip of a spiral while he sits here, waiting to be pulled deeper, waiting to drown even after having called out for help. Carlos takes smaller bites than he ever has before, as though his own stomach were as sick as TK’s, protesting in simple empathy. And he watches him. He watches over TK at their dining table as though it were his purpose in life, a thing to which he is devoted with a singularity that narrows the spotlight of his entire world, and leaves TK staggered in the warm glow of its focus.

“Are you okay?” Carlos asks. They’ve talked about this question. Carlos started out blushing badly when he asked it. It’s not unlike his earlier inquiry of what’s wrong. The answer seems distressingly plain, as though any attempt at response were simply redundant. He’d clamoured the first time he’d asked it, swooned through apologies. He’d reached out to stroke TK’s cheek, and his fingers had trembled against his skin. TK had taken his hand, kissed the delicate pads of his fingers, and they’d talked about it. When Carlos asks if he’s okay, he’s not talking about the long run, doesn’t mean to ask if TK is okay in general. They both know the answer to that. They can taste it on the fractured air. When he asks, he’s referring only to the specific moment in which he utters the words. He’s asking if things are worse than usual right now, if this particular instant seems harder than all the others. He’s asking if TK can still breathe.

No pressure tags below! 💛

@carlos-tk @catanisspicy @chicgeekgirl89 @birdclowns @detective-giggles @goodways @lightningboltreader @louis-ii-reyes-strand @liminalmemories21 @ladytessa74 @redshirt2 @tailoredshirt @welcometololaland @alrightbuckaroo @orchidscript @reasonandfaithinharmony @mooshkat @inflarescent @thebumblecee @sanjuwrites @wtfuckevenknows @wandering-night19 @tarlosmalec

#tarlos #tk strand #carlos reyes #911 lone star #tarlos fic #wip wednesday

[vee-beeee]

(Part one) Robo Road Trip

HIIII

This is PART ONE BABY (edit I FINISHED COOKING right here)

Okay the last dbh post was KINDAA giving depression so heres a FLUFFY fluffy one thats been bouncing around my brain for a couple days, part one as im going to make a continuation that shows what camping is like with the boys.

Premise: Road Trip to the West coast with Conner, Nines and Sixty

Imagine those roads with trees surrounding them, thats the vibe

Also first time writing for SIXTY whoooo hope im not trash, he acts like a smug dramatic guy so idk

Conner, Nines and Sixty x reader

I believeee this is around 3k lol i went ham

Warnings: maybe a bad word because sixty, fluff with a capitol F, part one

I also recommended listening to ANY Lord Huron song while reading this, that is basically the road trip music

(Hey sidenote, I know some of the ecosystem is TRASHED in dbh but lets pretend thats not happening LOL)

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You were so happy to get out of the city.

And into the car for a 35 hour drive.

You really wanted to show your boys the mountain you would always camp at when you were on the West Coast. They all hadn't been outside of Detroit, being made to do one job IN Detroit, but now they were all deviant.

And you wanted to show them a taste of the outside world.

It took a while for you all to get packed, the droids really wanted to try experimenting with their wardrobes on this trip. They sought to explore their inner human as much as possible.

You all needed the appropriate gear, so you guys went on a little shopping spree to find a tent and basic camping stuff. Hank had actually tagged along to coach you guys on what to get, having gone camping a couple times himself. (he mostly talked with you and Conner while sending glares to Sixty and Nines)

You ended up getting a pretty fancy tent that was big enough for all of you, and some essential equipment for cooking and cleaning. You also snuck in some board and card games, even though you knew they would beat you. But you could probably win ONE time...

Right??

After buying the gear, you guys got planning. You could only stay camping for 5 days, as the station didn't necessarily enjoy losing 4 cops. Especially 3 of the 4 being advanced detective androids. But it had worked out, (the boys having saved an astronomical amount of sick days) and you planned on going sometime in the fall. You decided on a week and you remember hurriedly running to your calendar and circling the date and also drawing a bunch of small doodles around it. The boys had all watched you fondly, getting excited themselves.

It all lead up to this moment, where Conner sitting next to you in the driver seat and was setting the location in his new GPS, Nines and Sixty where packing the car, and you were making a road trip playlist. (Hey that's very important!)

"Hey Conner?" He hummed in response and didn't look at you, too busy trying to figure out a new gadget he got for his car.

"Do you like Lord Huron?" You were trying to decide what the perfect music to play was and realized that Lord Huron existed. You weren't really sure how androids experienced music so you thought of asking. He huffed out a sigh directed at the troublesome device and turned to look at your phone, where you also had your eyes glued.

"I don't really listen to music as such, but Hank has introduced me to heavy metal. Is it like that?" You giggled remembering Hanks music taste

"No its more gentle, relaxing. It reminds me of walking in the woods." Out of the corner of your eye Conner looked away, LED blinking amber and blue. He looked back at you with a soft smile and this time you met his gaze.

"That sounds delightful, my dear. Perfect for this occasion" You flushed at the nickname, and he chuckled seeing your reaction. He leaned in and kissed your cheek before exiting the car, hearing Sixty's call that they were almost done. You sat in the vehicle, skin heating, and raising a hand to graze the place he kissed you. You loved when he did that. A steady knock at the window startled you and you whipped around to see a familiar face (sixty) smirking at you, seeing that you were flushed. You stuck your tongue out at him and he reciprocated, sticking his tongue back at you.

"If you two would stop behaving like children, we would be done much sooner." A booming voice cut through your contest with sixty, and you watched him roll his eyes and face an annoyed Nines. You got out of the car to go help the RK900 with what he was carrying. He was still grumpy so you smiled softly at him and mouthed an apology. He relaxed slightly, but still shot a glare at sixty, who chuckled and went back into the apartment and get more bags. You then took the time to appreciate Conner's awesome Bat Mobile car. It had a huge trunk that managed to fit all of your stuff, tent included. It was truly a miracle machine.

You walked over to the car and gave the suitcase to Conner who situated it nicely in a perfect space. You were also lucky to have android boyfriends who were amazing at managing tight spaces and fitting things into them.

After a couple of minutes, Sixty emerged with the last of the bags. He informed you all that he locked the house up and engaged the security systems. The final step. You were really going.

You all piled into the car, both Nines and Sixty insisting you take the front seat. You accepted, but promised to swap with them when you got to the next stop. Most rest stops would be for you, needing to get food or use a restroom. The droids didn't need anything but told you they needed to get up and stretch their legs once in a while ( but you think that was just their excuse so they could follow you around and make sure you were safe at suspicious gas stations.)

After a while of driving through the city, Conner was getting on the highway when you announced that you would be playing a Lord Huron song and see how everyone liked it. You turned on "Meet Me in the Woods" and leaned back to look out the window.

"I took a little journey to the unknown,

And I've come back changed I can feel it in my bones

I messed with the forces our eyes cant see

Now the darkness got a hold on me

Oh, the darkness got a hold on me"

You had closed your eyes and started to quietly sing along, and realized you should see what the others thought about it. You turned your head slightly to Conner staring out at the road ahead, his LED blinking yellow and blue. He had a soft, lingering smile on his face and his posture was relaxed.

Sixty had his eyes closed, leaning his head all the way back on the seat and seemed to be absorbing the music.

Nines was also leaning back, arms crossed. He was staring out the window with his LED a soft, stable amber. He turned slightly to just catch the end of your gaze and his lips twitched in a cute, endearing way. It was a Nines smile. You smiled back at him and turned around to look out the front windshield. It was raining slightly, and you were just leaving the city and into the unknown. It was perfect.

After the song had finished, you tore your eyes away from the road

"Did you all like it?" you hopefully gazed at each individual and noticed they all looked at peace. Conner spoke first

"Do you have more music of that energy? I think I enjoyed it."

"I agree. More please"

"Indeed"

You looked around to see everyone nodding their heads and you beamed. And so, your playlist made it past the android enjoyment test. You settled in as it started the next song, feeling content. You could totally do 35 hours.

(4 hours in)

Update: why would you do this to yourself. 35 hours? Were you crazy? You loved road trips as much as the next guy, but you were dying. You guys were currently stuck in traffic, and the boys had gotten involved in a pretty intense "dad stuck in traffic" fight.

"Nines, going on I90 would have taken us to the heart of Chicago, do you want more traffic?"

"No it wouldn't if we took the round about. Whose the more advanced android here Conner."

"Woah, low blow"

"Be quiet Sixty"

This started as Nines getting mad at Conner for taking them down a road that had high traffic at that hour, and Conner defending himself. Sixty had no argument, he just liked being included.

"I took 294 because I knew it would keep us out of the worst of the traffic. No matter what, traffic is inevitable."

"It could have been avoidable had you followed my instructions"

You were sitting in the passenger seat, eyes squeezed shut listening to them argue. It was infuriating.

So you did something.

"Guys I'm going to jump out of the car and sprint down the street like a crazy person if you don't stop arguing. I'm dead serious" You snapped and stared them down. Or a least you tried, because your face betrayed you and you broke out into a smile giggle.

Conner looked guilty at first, but saw your grin and started chuckling, envisioning you running down the street like a madman. Nines bristled, still annoyed. Even if your giggle made his lips quirk. You made eye contact with Sixty and he was smirking at you, taking out his coin to mess around with.

You eventually sighed, a couple minutes having passed. You turned around to address Nines.

"Traffic was inevitable" then you turned to Conner "No arguing". You took Conner's hand in yours and held it. Another smile broke out onto his face and he turned to look out on the road. You felt a hand graze your neck and you twisted around to see Nines reaching out. He moved forward to peck your temple and then quietly apologized to Conner.

Mission Successful.

But that was mission one. Mission two was figuring out how to go to use the bathroom. Because you were currently stuck in traffic. That wasn't great. After a couple minutes of fidgeting your legs, Conner took his hand away from holding yours and looked toward you. His gaze was steady, as his LED blinked and you knew in the back of your head that he was scanning you.

"Do you have to use the lavatory?" You gasped and shoved his shoulder, watching him bite back a laugh, and then started sinking in to your seat.

"Conner! That's so embarrassing."

"Did maybe someone tell you to go before we left? Oh wait, that sounds like something I would say" Sixty spoke up from the back of the car. You turned around to gape at him, and he just sat there looking smug. You could hear Conner and Nines subdued chuckling behind the music that was playing.

You ended up holding out, absolutely refusing to go in the woods by the road, insisting that someone would see you. Conner pulled over at a gas station and you all but flew out of the car and bolted through the store until skidding to a stop right outside the bathroom.

When you got out, Sixty was buying your favorite snack and you saw Conner and Nines fueling up the car out the window. They were seriously so thoughtful.

After Sixty was done paying, you came up behind him and hugged his middle. He laughed and held your hands still on his middle, and spun you. You squeaked and he laughed harder. He stopped and unwrapped you to kiss your head and hand you your prized snack. You pecked his lips and left, both of you saying good day to the amused employee working there.

(17 hours in)

It started getting really late so you guys stayed at a motel for the night. You guys all relaxed on a fluffy bed, all party's included were happy to stretch their legs. You and Nines had been switching front seat and back seat, and Sixty had repeatedly old you he was fine where he was. Nines had revealed to you later that Sixty just wanted to sit next to you.

You got up from the bed first, eager to get ready and sleep. When you came out 30 minutes later, Conner was laying still under the blankets, staring at the celling. Nines was also under, and had rolled over to face the window. And Sixty had apparently, at some point while you were in the bathroom, been knocked off the bed. He was currently face down on the floor. You giggled and nudged his side. He rolled over, clutching his heart.

"They, (fake coughing) their so mean. They shoved me off the bed" you shook your head and leaned down on your knees to kiss his cheek. He accepted and rolled back over on his face. Conner then spoke up from the bed

"I wouldn't kiss his face, this floor is filthy." You stood up and laughed, making your way to the bed and crawling over him to slip between him and Nines. Nines stiffened until he got comfortable, and Conner wrapped his arms around you to spoon you.

"Just say your jealous she kissed me Conny" came a voice from the floor. Conner scoffed and replied with another rhetorical comment hidden in a nice tone. Nines joined in just when you started slipping into sleep, and the last thing you heard before you left to dream world was Conner whispering goodnight into your ear.

In the morning you woke up covered in androids. Very snugly droids. You all then got packed up and set off. During the drive, You found out Sixty had crawled into bed after you and shoved Nines off when he was in rest mode. Nines woke up very alarmed, and decided to continue his rest in one the the chairs in the room the motel provided. You had felt so bad afterwards, but he insisted it was fine.

You guys were driving through North Dakota today, and you were currently knitting. The boys were discussing a case that was giving them a hard time. You would have joined in but you believed in not talking about work on your precious vacation time. You were sitting in the back seat now, Sixty at your side, and it was very domestic. You felt a hand wrap itself around your knee and you smiled, continuing your stitch.

(30 hours in)

You were totally knocked out. The boys wanted to continue driving to beat traffic, and were currently talking through their android Verizon service (using their minds) as to not wake you up.

But you still accidently woke up with a start when Sixty had rolled his shoulder, unintentionally dropping your head off him. You had apparently drifted off resting your face on his soft puffy jacket.

To which he did NOT mind.

You squeaked awake, being surprisingly shoved off your pillow. Sixty immediately said a quiet apology, but it was too late. 2 angry droids turned there seats around to glare down the accused RK800.

"We told you to stay still" they said that almost in synch

"I was reaching for a blanket! I didn't know a small movement would wake her!"

You sleepily giggled at their little argument and passed out against him once again.

When you woke up for real, you were informed that you guys were almost three hours away. You breathed a sigh of relief, but still begged to pull over so you could get some air. You were in a beautiful parts of the woods and you desperately needed a stretch after sleeping on Sixty. No offence, but snuggling with androids is like snuggling with a very sturdy pillow. Your happy for it, but its not very squishy.

Nines had chuckled at how desperate you looked and obliged. You popped out and basically ran halfway down the road and back. You were huffing when you came back to the car. Conner rolled his window down, eyebrow raised. You wheezed

"Sorry, needed to run" He nodded in understanding, and actually got out himself to stretch his android joints and put on his cute little beanie. Sixty got out and straightened his tie, and Nines choose to stay in the car and work on coordinates. Sixty walked around the car to join you and Conner, and looped his arms around your waist. You yelped as he picked you up slightly to sling you back in forth.

"How are you enjoying the road trip?" He punctuated each word with a swing of your body. You were laughing when you responded "Good, but I'm excited to get there" Conner had been watching you fondly when he stated

"Nines says its 3 more hours, but we might get delayed depending on traffic." you nodded and Sixty set you down. You then went up to go hug Conner, making sure he wasn't missing any affection.

After more standing and stretching, you got in the front seat with Nines next to you, setting the car to auto drive. Conner and Sixty were sitting in the back, playing one of the card games you brought and starting to get very competitive with each other. You beamed and turned back to look at Nines. His eyes weren't on the road, however. He was staring at you with an expression of absolute love. You both sat and stared at each other until he leaned over and grabbed the back of your head, threaded his fingers into your hair, and kissed your temple. You shivered as his fingers rubbed your scalp and he grinned against your temple.

(5 minutes away from campsite)

You were bouncing off the walls excited. It had been years since you visited this spot, having been to far away after moving to Detroit. The boys had been enjoying the scenery outside the city, but now the were enthralled. The woods were huge, and the air was fresh. Moss hung from the arms of the trees and you could see your mountain peeking over the top of the forest. You guys were waiting in line at the entrance of the campsite to check in, and you were gushing about how pretty your spot was. It was nestled in the corner of the campsite, leading into a trail into your own personal forest. Complete with a little stream.

The androids were amused watching you talk about the park, but they were almost as excited as you. When you were sleeping, all they talked about was this new experience, and how happy they were to share it with you. It was interesting seeing all the new environments and experiencing what its like outside of the city. Detroit was so advanced, and they had never really been deep in the woods.

After patiently waiting, you finally got all checked in and remembered to buy some firewood.

Then, you were off.

Starting your very first camping trip with your wonderful android boyfriends

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PART ONE YALL

Hope its okay, had to really crack at this one to fit all my ideas in. Its also hard to write the dynamic between 4 people LOL

Hope I managed to capture their personalities okay

Part 2 is all about them camping so stay tuned

It might take a bit so hang on and let me cook 🔥

Sorry for plot holes or if this has been done beforee

#dbh connor #dbh connor x reader #dbh rk800 #detroit become human #dbh nines #dbh rk900 #dbh rk900 x reader #dbh sixty #dbh sixty x reader #road trip

[thecapricunt1616]

Blue Lotus - SxC One-Shot

♡ O/S Inspo: Blue Lotus - In Vedic Hindu tradition, the lotus represents enlightenment as well as purity. It is the symbol of the consciousness rising out of the mud of Maya and attaining its original nature or self-realization. 

♡ Summary: Carmen accidentally almost checks out of life permanently due to a migraine fucking up his vision, and Sugar flips & sends him off to a trauma rehabilitation center, Syd is realizing she finds it extremely hard to stay away from him.

♡ W/C: 7,616

♡ Posted Date: 04/06/2024

♡ A/N: This is my first SydCarmy fic aaa!!! I have a hard time writing in 3rd unless its not my characters, so writing in 3rd for them was okay! This OS is all thanks to the LOML - the person who FULLY turned me into a #SydCarmy4Lifer - @gingergofastboatsmojito - This fic was HEAVILY - heavily, inspired by hers - Tucson, It can be found right ❀ here ❀ - My only request is you go read hers if you are going to read this one!! Her SydCarmy fics are the best, and the only ones I really read, give her a follow because her SydCarmy theories are also out of this world. Also, YES GINGER - Stardust is .... a horse - ol' girl TOLD THEM she'd always be watching!! If you'd like to meet Madame in her human form, mosey on over here - this fic also heavily inspired me to write for SydCarmy hahaha. If y'all want more of Blue Lotus let me know! I have ideas for a PT 2 if it would fancy anyone :)

♡ Warnings for BTC: Accidental OD , Vomit, Sad Syd, but fluffy kinda!! Only lightly edited (we die like men), OC Carmy (IM SORRY) we all know he's down bad for her so maybe this can be considered IC Carm, because were just in his head more then watching him? But that's all basically.

➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡

Carmen was sick as a dog. Well - physically- the mental demons never stopped nagging at his overall happiness level, but it had been a long time since he’d felt this horrible, physically speaking, at least. 

His muscles were aching, to the point any brush on his skin left a dull pain in its wake. His throat was swollen and sore, he had a terrible fever- his head felt like it was so full of pressure that it would explode. 

He’d never experienced a headache like this before. His vision was actually spotty, there were little blotches in his vision, that were... glowing? He wasn’t quite sure, it was beyond the realm of anything he’d ever felt or seen before. 

That was what must have caused him to grab his black bottle of oxydose he’d gotten after a root canal he had a few months back- rather then his liquid Zyrtec cold and flu liquid medicine. 

The pain in his head was so bad, he didn’t even question why the usual cherry flavor had been replaced with bubblegum, as he swallows straight from the bottle, before putting the cap back on and going back to the couch, collapsing in the nest of pillows and blankets. 

It was only about 10 minutes, and Carmy was feeling fine- no…Carmen was feeling… amazing. 

His limbs all felt very heavy, but he felt warm, and comfortable. As comfortable as he’d ever felt. He actually found himself thinking ‘have I ever felt this good?!’ And before he knew it, he was laughing to himself about how he should double dose cold medicine more often, because he felt as if he was on cloud fucking nine. 

He laid back on the couch, closing his eyes, and wasn’t sure just how long he laid there that way. It could have been minutes, hours, days for all he knew. The only thing he was thinking of, was her. He began wondering what she was doing right now, if she was adorably leaned over the counter, writing in her little notebook- her braids cascaded over her face like a beautiful beaded curtain. 

If the blood in his arms hadn’t been replaced with cement, he’d have grabbed his phone and called her, and poured out his entire heart to her. Because nothing else in the world right now mattered. Carmen had no other thoughts, the past didn’t exist, nor did the future. The only thing that existed in this world at this very moment, was Sydney. 

‘Psssst’ 

Carmen opens his heavy lids, just barely, his vision was blurry and almost doubled. “Mmm?” He hums, not even sure if he heard someone- or why he would hear someone. He lived alone, and didn’t hear anyone come in. 

‘Yo. Dipshit.’ Carmen knew that voice anywhere. 

“What?” Carmy looked around, and knew something was very amiss, when his brother was standing there in his living room, looking at him. He had this ethereal glow to him. 

“What the fuck” Carmen said, sitting back on the couch, rubbing his eyes.  

‘You’re nodding out right now. Here’s what y’gonna do.’ 

Carmen couldn’t do anything but nod his head obediently, was Mikey really here? He couldn’t be- he was hallucinating. 

“Monkey are you here?” Carmen asks softly, rubbing his eyes again to see if he would disappear. He didn’t. 

‘I’m as here as you’ll be if Y’don’t listen. Crawl to the fucking bathroom and throw up. She’s gonna be here f’you, don’t fight her’ 

Before Carmy could look back at him and question what he meant - he was gone. 

Carmen suddenly felt…much too hot. He tried getting up, but narrowly missed bashing his skull on the coffee table trying to get to the bathroom, so he decided to take his wise older brother's advice and crawl there instead. 

He didn’t finish the journey, though. He actually collapsed in the bathroom a few feet in front of the toilet, luckily on his stomach. 

He was catching all sorts of luck today, because Syd had insisted she go and check on Carmy, as he was supposed to be at work today but hadn’t said a word- and that was nothing like him. 

She got the extra key from Nat, and told her she would go check because ‘Pregnant women have by nature weaker immune systems’ and would blame herself if she ‘let Carmen get her sick’, so she convinced Sugar to let her go by herself. 

When Sydney had opened the door, the first thing that greeted her was loads of empty Gatorade bottles on the coffee table near the couch, and a random French cooking show playing on the tv. 

“Carm?” She calls, but when she saw one of his feet sticking out from the bathroom, she dropped her bag and ran, gasping when she saw him splayed out there in a puddle of vomit, looking sickly pale, with dark blue lips and fingertips. 

“WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO YOURSELF!” She shrieked, getting him on his side as fast as she could and quickly pushing the emergency button on her phone, putting the call on speaker and setting it to the bathroom counter. 

“Carmen? CARMEN! Wake up!” She slapped his arm, shaking him violently. “Carmen! Oh- oh god.” She said nervously. 

‘911 do you need fire, medical, or police?’ The woman at the other end says. 

“Medical! Medical my friend- oh god Carmen” she shakes his shoulders. 

“Okay what’s your emergency?” The operator asks 

“Uhh- I- he’s- so he’s thrown up, he’s passed out, his pulse is weak- he- his lips- t-they’re blue. oh Carmy” she touches his cold clammy forehead. “He- he’s- he’s cold oh my god why is he COLD can you fucking send someone Jesus Christ!” Sydney snaps angrily. 

“Okay- it sounds like he is having an opioid crisis ma’am, do you have narcan available?” The operator asked her and Syds heart drops. 

“No- what? No! He- he wouldn’t- his brother- he…get here!” She said frantically and quickly told her the address of Carmen’s apartment complex.

“Yes, yes you’re calling on an Iphone, ma’am - we have your exact coordinates. Just in case - do not try to make him throw up more, make sure his airway is clear- what is your name?” The woman asked her. 

“Sydney- my name is fucking Sydney - but it doesn’t matter! He matters! My god! His name is Carmen- C-Carmen fucking Berzatto! Put that in your notes lady! He- he’s 31- where the fuck is the ambulance?!” She uses all of her strength to get him leaned up against the counter. 

His vomit was getting everywhere, but she didn’t care. She couldn’t find a way to care, the only thing that mattered to her was that each breath Carmy was taking looked more and more difficult. 

“They are en route! Remain calm, how long have you known this friend?” The Operator tried to distract Sydney, since there was only so much you could do for an OD patient if there was no narcan. 

“He- he’s my…my partner we run a restaurant together. This doesn’t matter! Save him. Please! I can’t loose him!” She said, shaking his shoulders. 

“Carmen! You fucking asshole! What did you do!!!” She shouts at him. “You would never do this! What did you do!!!” She couldn’t stop the tears from flowing, it didn’t matter though- Carmen wasn’t awake to see it. 

No, Carmen was far, far away. Somewhere floating between life and death, he felt like he was being embraced in the warmest most comforting hug he’d ever felt, he’d never been more comfortable in his life. 

But Syd, was in hell. Her own personal version of it. It felt like a lifetime before 2 paramedics came barreling into the bathroom, one of them holds Carmys head steady and the other sprays a full dosage of narcan in his nose. 

Sydney stood in the corner near the shower, shaking hands cupping her face absolutely terrified. 

Carmen was up now, nearly the second the paramedic hit the plunger release. He sits up with a gasp, eyes wide like a caged animal. 

“What the fuck.” He mumbles, looking at both of them before meeting eyes with Syd. 

“Syd?” He blinks a few times. 

She lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding “you asshole” she grumbles, wiping her teary eyes. 

“You’re home, you’re safe, you overdosed. Do you take opioids often?” The paramedic asked, putting a blood pressure cuff around Carmen’s arm. 

“What? No- what the fuck don’t touch me!” Carmen snaps, ripping off the cuff and whipping it across the bathroom “stop- stop! Stop touching me- get away” he shouted angrily “I’m fine” he hissed. 

“CARMEN!” Sydney barks, she’d never used that tone with him- so it was fair to say it very quickly got his attention. 

“You will let them do their job, dick. I just- I- I find you in a puddle of your own vomit on the bathroom floor- I couldn’t wake you up! So now? you’re gonna listen to them.” She said angrily, grabbing the blood pressure cuff from next to her leg where it fell and handing it back to the paramedic.

“Give him your arm.” She snipped. 

Carmen sits back against the bathroom wall like a dog being scolded, wordlessly offering his arm to the paramedic and keeping his gaze fixed on his lap. 

“192 over 96” the paramedic told the other. 

“Christ kid” the paramedic said, “gave you a fuckin dose of narcan and y’wired like y’re on coke” they helped him up and on the gurney. 

“Hes- he’s gonna be okay?” Sydney asked anxiously, watching as they buckled him in by his hips and legs. 

“He's gonna be fine in a day or so.” One of them responded. Carmen just looked away, the shame and embarrassment already looming over his mind like a huge storm cloud. 

“I’m gonna…I’ll- I’ll clean up, and meet you at the hospital, ok? And I’ll have sugar meet you” she told Carmen and went over, giving him a hug. 

He couldn’t understand. It made him slightly angry how sweet she was being to him. He was putting her out, he was fully fucking up her whole day- but all she was worried about was him. 

“Syd..I’m fine. Thanks. But I’m fine. Don't- just…ugh no- please- I’ll do it. Just go- go home. take the day” He said, gently patting her back. 

He wanted to throw his arms around her and never let go, he wanted to kiss her- he wanted to hold her and tell her he would never leave her again. He wanted to tell her he loved her. 

But he didn’t. He wouldn’t, and he wasn’t sure if he ever would, or could for that matter, since he didn’t even realize yet that was what the feeling in his heart really meant. 

“Thank god. Thank god you’re fine, Carm. What would I do without the biggest pain in my ass?” She teased. 

Even though Carmen was hurting all over in a way he didn’t realize was possible, his lungs were aching, as was his entire body, and he felt as if the pressure behind his eyes were going to make them pop out - he smiled. It was slight, of course. But it was there. 

“Couldn’t get rid’a’me if y’tried, Syd.” he told her. 

The ride to the hospital was Carmen’s nightmare. They insisted on the stupid flashing lights and sirens, since his blood pressure was ‘dangerously high’ so he was at risk for a heart attack, and then rolling him out on a stretcher in front of all his neighbors was nothing short of a god damn dumpster fire. 

He was never home, but like hell he’d ever intentionally show his face during the day again. 

The hospital was even worse, he got plugged in to all these monitors and had an oxygen mask, got poked and prodded with needles, and was told he was being put on a 24 hour psych hold per hospital policy after an overdose- just in case he’d been trying to end his own life. 

Sugar got there shortly after the nurses had finally let him be, when he heard her loudly telling them “CARMEN! BERZATTO! Like bear! B-e-r-z-a-t-t-o!!! Where IS HE !” He ripped off the oxygen mask, knowing if she saw him that way he’d never live it down. 

Even though it really was helping ease the ache in his lungs and the pain in his head, he was willing to deal with it for his very pregnant sister not to worry. 

Her heels click as she storms down the hall to his room, ripping the curtain back. 

“Oh- Bear” she said, bursting into tears and rushing up to him, hugging him tightly. “Oh my god, bear. Never do that! What did you do? No- no- you aren’t in trouble, you aren’t in trouble, Carmen. I love you. You just worried me! You made Sydney cry Carmy! What the fuck- what happened?” She cupped his cheeks, observing his exhausted face. 

“Oh you’re sick- you’re so sick- Carmy” she felt his forehead and cheeks with the back of her hand like she did when they were kids. “It was an accident, right, right Bear? You wouldn’t do this?” She said, more pleading him than asking.  

“No. No. No sug, no- I- I’d never. I just fucked up! I’m fine. I’m fine. C’mere” he hugs her close, kissing her head gently. “Stress isn’t good for the baby bear” he joked, hoping it would get her to lighten up. 

“Carmy stop” she pushed away, looking at him seriously. “No. No. This isn’t okay- nothing - nothing about this is okay, bear! You almost died! Syd said- “ she shook her head. “Carmy. I- we can’t do this. We can’t. You’re right.” She sniffled, sitting back in the chair next to his hospital bed and wiping her tears. 

“What- what do you mean?” He sat up a bit. 

“I- if you….i can’t watch you like this anymore, Carmy. I can’t- I can’t see you wither away. Fucking emotionally anymore. It’s killing me. It’s hurting-“ she took a shaking breath. 

“It’s hurting your niece. Carmen. I can’t do it anymore. here.” She dug around her purse, pulling out a brochure. 

“Go- go. Get out of fucking Chicago, Carm. This place- I-i heard of it” she sniffled “its stupid-“ she laughed a bit, shaking her head. “So stupid, fuckin this..this Astrologer. She said in her podcast that this is the best place to go based on the location? I dunno…it’s a therapy place” she said. 

Carmen looked at the Brochure, his brows raising. 

‘Blue Lotus Trauma Therapy Rehabilitation Center’ the front contained photos of absolutely breathtaking pine trees, mountains, as well as red cabins. 

‘Blue Lotus is tucked safely away on Big Bear Lake in Big Bear, CA. Come and experience an inpatient by day, outpatient by night 30 day program, along with 15 days of sole inpatient TF-CBT therapy, focused on your direct needs as a patient. We specialize here at Big Bear in Equestrian Therapy, and Cattle Therapy. Enjoy hiking on hundreds of miles of breathtaking trails, and get to know the stunning haven that is Big Bear, California.’ 

“Horses.” Carmen looks at her, unwavered. 

“Yes! They say they like- get us or something? You’ll be back before I give birth. Go. Carmen. Go. Or- or I can’t work there, anymore it-“ she shakes her head, looking down at her swollen belly as hot thick tears stream down her cheeks. “It’s like watching Michael…again. In a different way” she said quietly, wiping her face and looking up at him once again. “Please.” She whispered. 

He shook his head, setting the stupid brochure down on the bedside table and laying back in the bed, grabbing the oxygen since his head was beginning to pound again and putting it back over his face, averting her worried gaze. 

“I don’t have the energy to call these people” he muttered, closing his eyes and resting his head back, hoping that would be the end of the conversation. 

“I- I already got you a bed. I called them…on the way over- I begged them. And they are willing to take you, Carmy. Please. I’ll pick your cabin and everything - you- you stay in a cabin after the 15 days and then for 30 you go back and forth. It sounds so nice, bear. I know they’re gonna take such good care of you think about it- please- will you go?” she got up, pulling him into a hug. 

“Thank you” she whispered after a few moments when he didn’t decline her. 

Carmen didn’t reply. If Sugar really thought that stupid place would make him ‘change’ (if that was even possible) and if she really felt as if it was affecting her child that was growing inside of her- he would give it a try. Even though he felt as if it would be just another money pit in the name of ‘mental health’ that didn’t do a thing. 

“There’s dead man walkin’!” Richie said, Syd following in behind him. 

“Stop! Don’t call him that Richie it was scary!” Syd shoves his shoulder. 

Carmen grabbed the brochure, quickly tucking it under the blanket. 

“Fuck you, cousin” Carmy said, his voice all nasally and low from his flu or whatever the fuck he’d picked up, that had led him to giving himself a cocktail of meds that almost sent him to Michael prematurely by total mistake. 

“Carmen is leaving. As soon as he’s released. So- get your time in he won’t be home for a month or two” Sugar said and sat down, not budging on the issue. 

Carm just rolled his eyes, laying his head back and wanting to melt into a puddle on the floor, but at the same time, he also wanted to pull Syd into the stupidly small hospital bed, and hold her to him, never letting her go. 

“You are?” Syd asked, coming to his bedside and meeting his gaze. 

He just stared at her. Wordlessly, he pulled out the crumpled brochure and offered it to her. She took it, looking at it. Richie comes over as well, peeking over Syd’s shoulder to read. 

“Equestrian therapy? Gonna go play with some horsies Carm?” He teased, his smugness being wiped off his face when Syd stomps on his foot with most of her weight, causing him to whine in pain. 

“Woops! Maybe you should learn some personal fucking space asshole” she shoved back in to him so he would take a few steps back. 

“Ow!” He said dramatically, plopping next to Sugar who was also glaring at him with equal fire. 

“Okay- okay- sorry fuckin hell. The kid is fine” he said and Carmen motions to him. 

“See! See! Jagoff is right sometimes” he said to Syd and she shook her head. 

“This…is good. This is really good. I’m for this.” She said, looking at Sugar before handing the brochure back to him. “I’m… gonna miss you, but…you need to get the fuck out. Like really, out, Carm.” She told him. 

He sighed deeply, resting his head back and closing his eyes once more. 

Whatever will make Syd happy, he would do, no matter the amount of discomfort it brought him. 

“Fine.” He mumbled.  

“Really?” Sugar asked him and he looked over at her, brows slightly furrowed. 

“Want me to fuckin fight you about it?” He snipped, already annoyed with how easy he was giving in- but he was too exhausted to fight, and Syds lavender perfume was so comforting, and so familiar. He just wanted everyone except Syd to leave, and to be able to hold her. 

That wasn’t going to happen though, probably ever was what he’d told himself. No, that would be too good, the universe would be much too kind to Carmy as to let him have the ultimate pleasure and enjoyment that would come from being with her in that way. 

“No…no. I’m sorry. Thank you, Bear. I know this is gonna be good”  Sugar said quietly. 

The doctor came in, saving Carmen from the uncomfortable conversation. “Hello again, Mr.Berzatto. I have your results here- is this okay company? If not I can have them step out for a moment” she’d said. 

Carmen had already completely forgotten her name, her name to him was simple - not Claire. Which was the only good thing to happen to him today. 

“As long as I’m not dying cause these two will pitch a fit. You can go ahead” he said, sitting up slightly in the bed. 

“No, no. you are very healthy, well- for the most part. Does your family have a history of high blood pressure?” She asked, sitting in the rolling chair next to the bed and holding her tablet in her lap. 

“Dad. Dad did, bear.” Sugar said. 

“Oh! Lovely- and did dad also have chronic treatment resistant depression?” The doctor turns to her. 

“I- I don’t know but…I know he was depressed for sure.” Sugar replied honestly. 

“And I know per your file you’re a smoker, heavy or moderate?” The doctor asked 

“Heavy” Syd buts in and Carmen didn’t even have the energy to fight either of the women. 

“So heavy is a pack plus a day does that sound average?” The doctor asked Carmy and he nods a bit. 

“Sometimes…sometimes two. Depending on uh…how shit is” he cleared his throat. 

“Yeah, so we’re gonna need to reduce as much as we possibly can. And we’re also going to speak about treatment options. Have you ever done mental therapy?” She asked Carmen. 

“He’s getting help. Don’t worry” Sugar said, “he’s going to do a therapy program. Blue lotus? Heard of it?” She asked. 

The doctor nods with a slight smile. “That would be wonderful for you, by the looks of your chart.” She got up. 

“Visiting hours are over at 10 pm, he will need to remain here until at least 1 pm tomorrow afternoon- then he’s yours.” She headed towards the door, shutting the privacy curtain behind her before closing the door. 

Richie chuckled “hack job name” he muttered, rubbing his face tiredly. 

“What was her name?” Sugar looked over at him. 

“Doctor Ginseng?” He said, “isn’t that a- a fuckin-“ 

“A root. A very expensive, luxurious root. It can be put into tea, or soup…the native people of China believe it has properties that make your body better deal with stress” Syd said absentmindedly, staring at the clock while nervously twirling the end of one of her braids. 

“She got it” Carm said and the corners of his lips tugged into a smile, just a bit. He absolutely adored the way if Syd wasn’t beating him to the punch when someone asked a random food question- that she was teaching him something. 

Even after years in the kitchen, the hundreds of hours watching cooking shows, Sydney still managed to teach him. He was utterly amazed by her every single day. 

“That’s a good idea. I- I think we have some. Back at the restaurant. All the stuff here will be shit- I’m gonna make you tea. And soup.” she got up, grabbing her bag. “Don’t fucking die when I’m gone, Kay? Guess you need that reminder now” she told him. 

He rolled his eyes slightly “Y’don’t have t’fuckin make me tea Syd. I’m fine.” He said, but something deep inside him yearned for Syd to take care of him. He craved it. 

“I’m making the tea, and you’re drinking the tea. Be back soon” she said before heading out.

Sydney had stuffed Carm full of pastina chicken soup and warm ginseng tea with lemon, ginger root, and plenty of local honey. As well as sourdough bread that Marcus had made fresh that morning. 

They sat and talked, just the two of them for hours until visiting hours were over. The nurse had to actually warn them both that she’d told them 4 times already it was past visiting hours and she ‘wasn’t afraid to have people removed’ before Sydney finally hugged Carmy goodbye and left. 

They both took his leaving for 45 days extremely serious. They’d joked together about just how quickly and casually Sugar had whipped out the information, all put together so neatly - it was quite obvious she’d been waiting for an opportunity to ship Carmen off here. 

They laughed a bit, and shared stories, and of course Carm answered any and every question Syd had about running the restaurant on her own while he was going to be away. 

Syd had even pulled a chair up to the bed at one point, resting her legs across the mattress after taking her shoes off, and her legs were draped across his own. He didn’t dare say anything, though. He was relishing in the feeling of closeness with her, even if it was as close as they’d ever be.  

Syd had actually made him so excited that the nurse had come in when she first came back and Carmy realized they’d be alone, to realize he was perfectly fine- his heart had just settled at a new pace since she was around. 

He was feeling worlds better by the time he’d gotten to the airport on Sunday morning. He’d spent the rest of Saturday evening at Sugars after he’d been discharged from the hospital, and had one last close family meal with Syd, Richie, Nat, and Pete, well, Pete was a must - he couldn’t uninvite the man from his own house, unfortunately. 

Carmen would be in a hotel in Big Bear, California by nightfall, and by the following morning he’d be starting his 15 day inpatient stint at ‘Blue Lotus Trauma Therapy Rehabilitation Center’ tucked away on a farm, in a dip of Big Bear Lake. How fitting. 

The parking lot of the airport was full of tears, not from Carmy- of course, but a very tearful Sugar, who’d conveniently spent the rest of his hospital stay packing him 2 weeks of clothes to cycle through, explaining phones were allowed- but they gave the toiletries, since it was a mental health center after all. 

She kept hugging him, kissing his cheeks- as if she was sending him to war and not a fucking treatment center. “Is there…somethin’ I’m missing- am I never coming back er somethin are you selling me to some weird chef collector?” Carmen teased, getting at least a small giggle from her. 

“God no. I just… this will work Carmy. It has to work. You’ll get better, okay? It’ll all be fine.” She wiped her face. He nodded a bit. 

“It’ll work.” He said, he wasn’t sure if he believed it- but if it got her to stop feeling so sad, he would agree. 

“I love you, be safe ok?” She said for the millionth time “and remember look at your phone I sent you-“ 

“The flight number, Nat. I love you. Thank you again” he kissed her cheek, grabbing his suitcase and opening his texts, clicking his flight number she sent him. 

“Gate D11! Thank you Nat. Gotta go now- unless…” he teased. 

She smiled a bit, finally. “Get out of Chicago.” She pat his arm gently and got back in the car to a waiting Pete. 

The flight was okay, it felt much longer than he was expecting, but his anxiety told him a lot of things- he couldn’t trust minute things such as time and how he understands it anymore. The first thing he noticed upon landing was the stunning green, and the crisp air. 

The air felt…cleaner, then Chicago. It was chilly- since fall was quickly approaching. Carmen was suddenly grateful Nat had him put on a hoodie before leaving this afternoon. He had the entire evening to explore, and not be himself. 

He already was feeling some kind of new. He wasn’t here to work, definitely not to play, but he could enjoy himself, because he didn’t have to be him. At least not for the night. He opened the Uber app on his phone, booking a trip to the hotel to check in.  

When he’d gotten to the hotel and showered, dressing in some vintage Levi’s and a white long sleeve in trade for his short sleeve, along with his favorite plaid jacket. He had to get somewhere to see how people live here, how to be apart here, so he didn’t stick out like a sore thumb at this rehab place. 

He’d grabbed his backpack, slinging it over his shoulders and opened Apple Maps on his phone, looking for a park to go sit at and just be. He found a park close by, simply called ‘BearHill Park’ and following the walking directions. 

He’d missed his ventures to various parks in New York, but especially in Copenhagen. Copenhagen had the most beautiful sunsets Carmen had ever seen before. He missed it sometimes, not the work, but the life. It felt worlds more simple then his life now, where every relationship, every aspect of his job- was dripping with difficulty to manage it all. 

When he got to the park, he’d found an oak tree that looked well over 200 years old, getting situated under it and resting against the trunk, taking out a cigarette and lighting it.  

He watched a couple and a baby walking by, carefully though as he’d learned quickly as a child most people don’t take kindly to being looked at for more then a few moments at a time. But Carmen didn’t watch people in an odd way, of course. He was just wanting to observe, see how he should be. And in a place so new, so out of his ordinary all by himself, it was gonna take a lot of observing to get himself readjusted. 

He watched as the father pushed the carriage along, the mother holding his hand happily. They were far away so he couldn’t hear what they were speaking about, but it must be funny because their heads were tilted back in laughter multiple points throughout the conversation as they continued on. 

He continued on his cigarette, his eyes now finding a younger couple. He sat up a bit, leaning further against the tree to get a better look. From behind, the woman reminded him a lot of Syd, of course it wasn’t- but it was also the way her boyfriend or- husband- Carmen wasn’t emotionally advanced enough to look for a ring, he’d never needed to before.

It was how his arms were covered in tattoos, and his hair was a muss of dirty blonde curls like his. It was how the woman was beautifully tall, with stunning long black braids, and a floral scarf tied around the top of her head. She was much more…boisterous then Syd, but none the less. They looked like them in another world.  

So not only, has this other man, found his Syd, the universe was determined to rub Carmen’s nose in it, or that’s how he took it, anyhow. 

He scoffed a bit, rolling his eyes and looking the other way. Of course. He thought. Everyone can be happy but me. I’m headed to adult crazy camp! And those two are just, fuckin happy and in love. 

The girl laughed loudly, causing Carmen to look back over. “CAMREN!” She squeaked as he tickled her. “Cam! Stop- I-I can’t breathe!! You asshole” she punched his shoulder playfully. 

“Do you give up?! Say it!!!” The man countered, continuing the assault on her sides. 

“No- NO! This- this is cheating!” She said, interrupted by her own laughs. 

“Cheating?! No, I'm getting what’s rightfully mine Scarlett!” He pinned her arms above her head. 

Carmen now looked away. He couldn’t help but think of Syd while watching them, and think of everything he was too pussy to pull off. He wished he could take Syd somewhere like this, but who would run the restaurant, and why would she say yes. 

He’d finished his cigarette by the time the couple had left and he took out his sketchbook and the pen that lived inside of it. He looked at the recipe on his phone Syd had sent ‘Farro Mafaldine with browned Black Truffle Butter and Chanterelles mushrooms’ 

He had tried it for her, and he actually told her he wanted another bite to be sure he was ‘getting everything’ when really- it was just so fantastic he couldn’t stop at one single bite. 

“Syd that is…wow. Really, really fuckin fire. If it weren’t for the mushroom, we’d need that on the permanent menu. Have you tried others?” He’d asked. 

Syd just smiled and nodded, a lot of times she was around Carmen- she thanked god for her darker complexion, considering he made her feel overly hot, all the time. Nearly every time he spoke to her, and she wasn’t sure why. It wasn’t always this way. But ever since they opened the restaurant together- things had changed between them. Not for better, not for worse, the energy just… shifted. 

Carmen got lost in thought of Syd, and before he could realize what he was doing- he was drawing her. He rested his elbow on his knee, crouched over as he added details to each intricate little braid. It was one of Carmen’s favorite things about Sydney. 

No matter how she wore her hair, she looked absolutely beautiful. The braids, he did have to admit, were his favorite. Maybe it was because it was how her hair was when they met, but they interested him. He wanted to sit and watch her doing them. She told him a while back, she did them herself. 

Apparently, her mother wasn’t able to teach her- but she had cousins that could. She says it was usually much more expensive to have it done then just do it yourself, that part made sense to him. He was really impressed the first time he told her, she laughed a bit at that.  

‘Most of us do our own hair, I mean- unless you got it like that. But otherwise, just like the white girls we have to do it on our own’ Carmen blushed, feeling silly for not realizing. 

‘Yeah- yeah I..I get that but. I dunno…I’ve seen Sug do her hair…it seems easier” he rubbed the back of his neck nervously. 

‘Oh, well yeah, that’s why I only do mine every 6 weeks!’ She’d said, wiping down the counter. 

‘Really? Well that’s cool. I thought you like…I dunno.’ He chuckled a bit. 

‘That I went home, took out 200 plus braids, and then put them all back in before I come in every day?’ She teased. 

Now Carmen’s cheeks were bright red. ‘Okay- listen I’m not a girl. I wouldn’t know’ 

Carmen caught himself smiling at the memory. He looked up at the setting sky, and his heart fluttered a bit at the beauty of it. He’d realized he’d sat there now for probably 5 hours, his back was aching, but he didn’t care. 

He didn’t care because this was the most at peace he’d felt since moving back to the states. And he was alone. He snapped a photo of the gorgeous sunset with his phone, hitting the send button and hovering over Syds name for a moment, before deciding to click it. 

She did tell him to text her when she got settled in after all. 

In CA - this place lives up to the name. Never seen so many bear statues in my life. 

He sends the text, with the photo attached, not even realizing the photo had been a live capture, and you could fully see the drawing of Syd for half a second if you held the photo down. 

He put his phone back in his pocket, continuing on his drawing. Back in Chicago, Syd was very glad that she was working today- because the only thing on her mind otherwise was one single person. 

“Okay guys! I need some hands here- we got 3 dishes for table 13 let’s move! Keep up the pace!” She called out. She had already been here 12 hours, and wasn’t planning on being out for another 6. 

It was just how Sydney operated - she couldn’t sit and worry about Carmen. It would just unearth emotions she didn’t want to go searching for, and once they came up she was worried it would ruin absolutely everything she’d worked so hard to maintain. 

And back across the country, 2,000 miles away, Carmen was contently packing his backpack, getting up, and heading to a small diner he’d seen. He enjoyed a quiet burger to himself, in the corner booth, looking out the window at the water. 

The place truly was beautiful, and very hidden away. There were barely any cars here, it was fully the opposite of anywhere he’d stayed long term, and he was beginning to feel as if he needed that, he wouldn’t admit that to sugar, though. 

He’d gone back to his hotel, taken a shower, gotten in his pajamas, and was laid in bed, watching some random cooking show on the food network since the TV unfortunately didn’t have YouTube like his did. 

When Sydney had seen the photo, she almost didn’t realize it was live at first. She was also at home, finally in bed- but she was 2 hours ahead of Carmen- so instead of it being 11 pm- it was 1 am. She’d scrubbed the restaurant floor until she was sure someone could eat off it, and made sure every station was in perfect condition before returning home.  

She laid in bed with sore hands, a sore back, and sore knees, and sore- well, everything. When she finally had checked her phone and seen it. She smiled a bit at the comment about the bear statues, clicking the photo open to see more. 

It was a breathtaking sunset for sure. She went to close the photo, her thumb lingering because she saw a speck of white in the corner- and the photo started moving. For just a short moment she sees…. Herself? On the page of Carmen’s sketchbook.

She could feel her heart thumping in her throat. Why would he be drawing her? Unless- no! Keep the emotions buried! He is sick. He is so depressed- treatment resistant depression the doctor had said his chart showed. 

She swallowed thickly, not sure what to say back. Should she just ignore it? Should she mention it boldly? Should she just…forget about it and convince herself it didn’t happen? 

She typed and retyped the message multiple times, smiling to herself a bit as she jokingly typed out ‘pretty sunset, even prettier drawing.’ Before deleting it and retyping before hitting send;

fire sunset. so I take it big bear is treating the bear well so far?

Carmen looked at the message right away, smiling to himself a bit. She’d never called him bear before, something about it made his heart begin to race. 

According to Nat, bear+big bear = depression gone, I’ll let you know in a few days if that's the truth.

He wasn’t sure about the whole equestrian therapy thing still, but he did know that being here seemed to allow him to breathe a little easier- and he was already here, so he would try.

The first 5 days in the inpatient program were…quite the adjustment. That was because it was what he learned was the most intensive part of the treatment, and meant to break down your walls by setting you in a hard routine so you had no choice but to think about your shit. 

This included a wake-up time of 6 am, the lights in his inpatient room literally turned on, then at 7:30 was breakfast, then- at 8 am they had 1 hour of either equestrian class, which you learned how to begin caring for the horses, or an hour of tending to the cows - Carmen chose the Horses because he was not going to shovel cow shit. 

Then, you had a therapy class of your choice from 9-11:30, he chose art therapy. It didn’t feel like therapy to him, they got to draw, or paint. Carmen just sat by the window, drawing different recipes - or, more often than not, drawing Syd from memory. 

12:00 was lunch, 12:30-2:00 you had mandatory either equestrian therapy, or cattle therapy. Carmen was more drawn towards the cattle on hard days, and the horses on easier ones. This was because the hour of 3-4 was mandatory group therapy. That usually emotionally drained him until at least art therapy the following day, since to progress and complete the program- you need ‘participation points’ in your 15 day inpatient stay, before you’re trusted to be on your almost fully on your own for a whole 30 days. 

The horses were usually nervous around new people, so it was a challange to get them to trust him. While the cows, people in the group joked- were ‘giant grass puppies’ the therapy consisted of literally just laying with the lazy cows and cuddling them, and feeding them snacks, which they very much enjoyed, and Carmen found to be very soothing once he learned to douse himself in bug spray before heading in the pen so the flys would be out of his way.

Then, dinner was at 5, and afterwards you had the evening to yourself in your room, or you could walk the trails until they closed at sunset. In your room you could watch tv, read, and the residents were also allowed to have their cellphones.  

It was quite exhausting the first 5 days, but the second 5 he was getting into a groove at Blue Lotus. He was beginning to enjoy the hard manual work that came with working with the animals, and the time it took to build their trust. There was one particular horse Carmen had become fond of, a white horse named Stardust. Perfect name for her. 

When he looked in her eyes she felt more human then most people he met in real life. She was different then the other horses. He’d been told that she rarely took to men, and that he was the only male she’d never need startled by. He always took extra time brushing her mane, and they both seemed to appreciate eachothers silence. 

Carmen heard other people in stalls next to him, they would talk to the horses- dump their issues they were too afraid to tell their therapists out on them. He wondered if the horses ever got annoyed, he probably would if he was a horse. He smiled a bit at the thought, and it was almost as if Stardust could tell what he was thinking, because she turned her head and looked at him before snorting almost in agreement and sticking her head back out of the stall. 

Getting into outpatient life at lotus though, was as easy as falling into bed for Carmen. His inpatient stay, he made sure to take the time in the evenings to learn his favorite quiet trails, the ones less taken usually, so when he graduated to outpatient - he could take stardust for rides on his own.

 It took them about 3 days to get to know each other in that regard, it was mostly Carmen’s fault though he realized, because when he’d get nervous he’d pull on her reigns in such a way that she thought he meant for her to go faster - when it was the opposite. But, Stardust was so, so patient with Carmen. 

He made sure to sneak her extra apples with a small drizzle of honey in return, so she knew her patience with him always came with great reward. 

Carmen had been gone for about a month now, he and Syd would text intermittently, sugar was sure to call once a week and they’d talk for about an hour. But it was mostly quiet from Carmen’s end, he had told them it was because he was usually out, all day long unless he was at therapy. 

It was day 19 of the outpatient part of the program, so he had just 11 days left. He had just finished his morning art therapy, and was in the stables tending to stardust, feeding her slices of pumpkin they’d had in the snack bucket for the horses today. “Come onnn- the tongue, really star” he wipes his wet hand on his jeans and she nudged his shoulder with his nose, asking for more. 

“You are greedy! I’m always the first one in here y’gotta leave some for the rest of these guys!” He grabbed another piece of pumpkin, feeding it to her. 

“And this is our horse stable, he spends a lot of time out here” Carmen heard one of the employees likely giving someone a tour, only half listening. 

Stardust snorts at him, nudging his chest and he rubs her neck gently. “What is it? Y’done? Pumpkin not good enough for ya? No honey apples until after our ride or Y’don’t listen missy” he pats her head gently. 

“I didn’t take you for a horse guy but I guess drop anyone off in the middle of nowhere and you’d be surprised. 34 days and you went full fuckin’ cowboy on me- are those boots, Carm? ” An all too familiar voice said from the large open sliding door of the stable He looked at stardust for a moment, he must be dreaming, or ODing again. Maybe he died, and had been dead the entire time. Because there was no way he could believe Sydney Adamu was standing behind him, 2000 miles away from their shared city, in Big Bear, California.

➵ 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 ♡♡♡ ⋙

#carmen berzatto #the bear fx #carmy berzatto #the bear fic #the bear hulu #carmen berzatto fanfiction #the bear #carmy berzatto fanfiction #the bear fanfiction #carmen berzatto fluff #carmen x sydney #sydcarmy for life #syd x carmen #sydcarmy #carmy x sydney #sydxcarmy fanfiction #sydcarmy fanfiction #sydcarmy fanfic #sydcarmy fic #sydney adamu #sydney x carmy #sydney adamu fanfic #sydney adamu fanfiction #borders & banners by saradika #syd x carmy

[onestepbackwards]

a lot of the self!aware volo content around here usually revolves around the player either forgiving volo/keeping him in check so that he doesnt screw shit up more than he already had, but i wanna experiment with the idea of what were to happen if the player scorned volo for what he did, and getting angry to the point volo wishes that he faced the wrath of that phony "god" arceus and not *you.*

volo has a very concerning obsession with getting closer to what he views as a "god", right? so, when he finds out about you, that obsession triples in size, if not quadruples. to think that a deity, more powerful than arceus or ANY of the legendaries or the mythicals combined was simply walking around under his nose in the form of rei/akari, it drives him to bits and pieces. yet, every time he encounters the chosen of arceus in question, he can only feel the air in his lungs escape the atmosphere around him becoming thick as a ditto. he looks into the skies of hisui above only to be greeted with a face. *your* face. volo was always one to find or point out the obvious, yet he didnt want to point out the fact that you were angry at him. rageful, even. what goul does he possess that makes him just walk up to you after what he did?

obviously, he knows its because of that itty bitty little betrayal against akari/rei. its his purpose to be the villain, could you really fault him for that? ... okay, you probably can. but if there is one thing, and ONE thing that volo knows at this point, its the length of the hole he buried himself in. arceus, for all he cared, could simply send volo to a place, somewhere far far away from jubilife where he wouldn't need to see anyone for the sake of not causing more uproars. he can live with that, im sure of that. but you can do so much more. you can edit the world as you please, get rid and change every aspect that you want without the consequences of any life lost, and that scared volo to his core. he could battle akari/rei for all the time in the world, but not even his strongest pokemon can have hopes to even come to the power you possess.

a mortal ai facing the wrath of the unknown and the inevitable. its almost funny how terrifying that sounds.

ajfsdfjsjdf Man knows he fucked up. Fucked around and found out. He's gonna be spending so much time beating himself up about it. And the fear. The fear you must hate him. The fear of the unknown. It leaves him so sick to his stomach. Should he do anything? He fears trying to backtrack to please you would make you angry, but in the end, was it his fault? You created this world, no? Or rule over it? And he was created for your entertainment? It still leaves him feeling conflicted and ill. Your anger on top of it? He sometimes wonders if he should get out of bed

#zed.talks #ask #anon #love reading lil blurbs like this #pla #self aware au #self aware pokemon #self aware volo #volo #long post

[goldenempyrean]

sick reader and scarlett with “Okay Ms I’m-not-sick, tell me why you sneezed five times in the span of an hour.” and “I don’t get colds.” where reader is super sneezy but in denial as they try to shoot some movie scenes

By Your Side

〚 Notes - Okay I know Im posted less then usual, that'll probably be the case until my exams are over! Anyway, enjoy :) (also, have I even bothered to edit this? No of course not, so excuse the errors) 〛

〚 Summary - You're obviously getting sick, wether you want to admit it or not. And its obvious your girlfriend wasnt about to let you work for long once she found out. 〛

〚 Wordcount - 10023 〛

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As the cameras rolled, the set was buzzing with energy. The crew was rushing around, trying to make sure everything was perfect for the next scene. The other actors were getting into character, preparing themselves for the performance. Then there was you, playing the lead role in the newest hit rom-com that was predicted to break box-office records, and were you excited for the day ahead? Nope. You definitely were not – not with those aching sinuses and the constant need to sneeze looming at the back of your nose. 

Atleast you had Scarlett with you though. Your girlfriend had been hired as one of the leading producers for the film so the two of you were able to spend a lot of your time together. As you readied yourself for your scene, she took her place, giving you an eager thumbs up before ‘action’ was called.  

You tried your best to ignore the tickle in your nose and the pressure building in your head as you delivered your lines with enthusiasm. But then, in the middle of your monologue, you felt a sneeze coming on. You tried to suppress it, but it was no use – your body took over, and you sneezed loudly, causing the other actors to pause their lines and the crew to stare at you in surprise. 

“Bless you!” You heard her voice call out, causing you to look over in her direction offering a small scrunch of your nose as you mouthed a ‘thank you’ 

You tried your best to focus on your lines and immerse yourself in your character, but your body had other ideas. You’d only managed to get some take done before your nose grew annoyed once more. You could feel the tickle in your nose growing stronger with every passing moment, and you knew it was only a matter of time before the inevitable sneeze came. 

Sure enough, a few minutes into the next scene, you let out a loud, explosive sneeze that echoed throughout the set. You froze instantly, looking around to see if anyone had noticed. Scarlett shot you a concerned look from behind the camera, but you ignored it, determined to push through. But your sneezing didn't stop there. You sneezed again, and again, and again, each time feeling more and more drained. Finally, after what felt like hours but was probably only a few minutes, the scene was over, and you collapsed onto a nearby chair, coughing into your elbow whilst trying to ignore the worried looks of your colleagues. 

Suddenly there was a hand rubbing against your back. “You ok, my sweetheart?” You felt Scarlett’s warm hand against your back as she rubbed it affectionately, “Something bothering that nose of yours?” 

You tried to give her a reassuring smile, but it came out more like a grimace as you cleared your throat - though it did little to hide your obviously raspy voice, “It’s nothing, I don’t know why that keeps happening.”  

 “You getting sick maybe? There has been something going round.” Scarlett worried, that worry only increasing when you turned away to cough into your elbow, exhaustion plain on your face. 

 "I don't get colds," you replied defensively, trying to mask the stuffiness in your voice. 

Scarlett raised an eyebrow. " Well, you're definitely sneezing a lot for someone who doesn't get colds. Why don't you take a break and rest for a bit? I can handle things here." 

"No, it’s fine. I really don't get colds," you repeated stubbornly, trying to shrug off her touch when she brought her palm up to your forehead, "It's probably just allergies or something." 

Scarlett gave you a skeptical look, but she didn't push it further. Instead, she went to talk to the director, explaining that you were feeling unwell and needed to take a break. Luckily your director was a kind soul and was more than understanding. Infact, he ended up telling Scarlett to just take you back the trailer – it was better than you accidently infecting anyone else with the cold you totally didn’t have. 

As soon as she was given the go ahead, Scarlett quickly ushered you to a quiet corner of the studio, where she sat you down away from the looming eyes of you colleagues and brought over a glass of water along with some tissues. "You're not fooling anyone, you know," she said gently as she sat beside you, handing you the tissues. "You're clearly sick, and I know you don’t get sick often, I know but you are right now, so you need to starting taking care of yourself more baby. This isn’t good for you sweetie.” 

You went to respond, ready to brush off her concerns but instead your nose spoke for you, “iishiew! Hih’tshoo!” 

"Bless you. Look, I know you're trying to tough it out, but I'm worried about you. You need to rest," Scarlett said as her palm touched against your forehead once more, her thumb brushing against your eyebrows this time as she used her hand to shield your eyes from the harsh lights, "You're really burning up." 

You groaned, feeling defeated. Scarlett was right - you were feeling worse than you wanted to admit. Maybe it was time to stop being so stubborn and take a break. "Okay, maybe you're right. You leaned further into her touch, feeling the coolness of her hand against your clammy forehead. "Okay, fine," you said, your voice a little hoarse now, "Maybe I do need to take a break." 

Scarlett smiled, looking relieved. "Good. Let's get you back to the trailer and make you some soup or something. Whatever we do we’ll get you tucked up in bed and have you feeling better in no time I promise sweetheart." 

As Scarlett led you away, you couldn't help but feel grateful for her support and concern. Even though you were stubbornly trying to ignore your illness, she was there to remind you that it was okay to take a break and take care of yourself. Maybe you weren't as invincible as you thought, but with Scarlett by your side, you knew you could get through anything. 

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