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#oh and i didnt get an estimate for all the work they have to do bc the guy in charge of my case is new and probs forgot

arttuff · 2 years

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Okay, so I've wanted to get top surgery for years, but I have no idea how to get it started? Do you just like, call up your doctor and be like "hey can you cut off my tits thx?" How did you get started? (And how much did it cost...) Hope this isn't too personal, thanks.

this is gonna be real informal cuz im just some dude im not a professional

here’s a super basic overview of how I went about it :) let me know if you have any questions anon! I’ll be happy to take a stab at answering

disclaimer is i live in australia so this is probably very specific to australia but if it helps, medicare (our public healthcare) didnt cover much except a couple hundred off the anaesthetist’s fee (but i wont include that in my estimate ily americans)

also this is just how i did it im sure everyone goes about it differently

but my first step was hrt (you dont need to go on hrt for top surgery but if you do it's recommended 6 months on testosterone before you get the surgery so you can get pecs goin beforehand and have more natural looking results. my pecs were juicy as hell by the time i got top surgery, so much so that my mum was surprised lol truly living up to my artstyle)

to do that i had to get a letter from my psychiatrist (this was covered by medicare) saying that i have a documented history of gender dysphoria and am mentally sane enough to seek treatment for it (this is just because of my medical history im pretty sure that not everyone has to do that plus you can look into informed consent)

with that letter of gender confirmation in your hot little hand you can then google around to find who it is you want to be doing your top surgery! i am so insanely lucky that i live in the biggest city in my country, meaning i had some good options. i settled on an award winning plastic/cosmetic surgeon that specialises in gender reassignment-- i love his results, and im so glad i went with him everything looks better than i expected it's so worth it!!!!

anyway once you choose a doctor you ring up and ask for a consultation-- this is not bulk billed but medicare can rebate a bit i think

thanks to covid all of the openings for consultations were full so i rang back once a week for 6 months (oh my god that's obsessive as fuck now that i put it together) until they had an opening

at the consultation you pretty much talk to your doc to let them know what you want, your identity, etc. im a nonbinary butch lesbian and i wanted some pecs but no nipple reconstruction (no nips no worries mate xx) and he made sure i was certain that's what i wanted and that i know the risks associated

the doc gives you an estimation and you decide whether you want to go through the public system (i think this is australia specific) and get put on a waiting list for 3+ years depending on demand, or do it privately (medicare, which everyone has, plust any private healthcare-- i have none)

i decided to go private because i do not think i could handle that wait, and ended up just being able to make it through with overtime at work heehee :) but good lord my wallet is starving

the cost is split up 3 ways between the doctor’s fees, the anaesthetist’s fees, and the hospital fees. there’s more expenses if you stay overnight at the hospital, so it’s better if you have someone to take you home and look after you

so all up i saved money in 2 places: the surgery itself was shorter because there was no nipple reconstruction, and i didn’t stay overnight so i didn’t have to pay that massive amount

all up my cost of surgery was around $11 000 aud (which is around usd $7 600) and the estimate he gave me was $14 000 aud ($9 600 usd)

that’s a vague and rambly overview! let me know if there’s anything you’re confused about anon! or if there’s any questions you have about top surgery recovery etc :) remember i can only give my perspective from how it’s done in australia I’m sure it’s way different elsewhere in the world

#not art #sorry for the massive spam anon i hope this answers your top surgery questions #anonymous #ask #ask to tag my friends

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37q · 1 year

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so yall know i gotta lor sis righ. well. fuck dude. those obligations from earlier. part rant part support seeking skip to the very end for that second part

context. 17 y/o not in school, homeless, lowkey estranged from her parents. father is unemployed and lying abt it, abusive and his ego is constantly reacting to his material precaritys impact on his manhood, sits at my old shop all day doing nothing. mom, actually employed, covering for dad, also used to work at my old shop before being fired for stealing a stack of cash, getting worse w her precarity and also sits at the shop a lot a lot. no idea where her lor bro sleeps. no idea how old he is too, could be 12 in an 8 year olds body for all i kno

so i pick her up at 1030, we go to the mall and check the ubreakifix type place and they dont work on iphone 8s. bet. we have a spare XR she bought off her big bro. missing sim tray, got a free replacement from the shop. go to the apple store, the XR is permalocked unless factory reset from the icloud acct tethered to the device (truly dystopian imo), schedule genius bar appt for tmrw at 11. take her back to her friends house, the one i hired a month before i left so she could have a comrade and a place to stay nearish work that isnt her moms (although they were kicked out of their motel right when i hired steven i think. so, unhappy coincidence?).

sis works then so i drop her off at work at 9 and take her phone w me. go home come back to the mall. genius at the bar says its busted, whatever. not like i been sayin that. its missing like the bottom 1/5 of the backing like straight up exposed circuitry and she leans it on its bottom edge on whatever flat surface she can find at her perpetually wet food service job. refurbished options more expensive than the cheap 'new' products, not saying much tho. deliver busted phone and info to her -- her mom and dad are there ofc -- go home. later pick her up that night (last night) and drive her to her gfs in the heights. oh also dropping steven and their mutual friend off at stevens on the way. whatever its like literally en route its actually kinda perfect every time.

apparently im picking her up this morning. Okay. oh yeah shes locked out of her paycard account. she locks the card when shes at 0 in case she gets an auto withdrawal thatll overdraft her. she got paid today so she was gonna unlock it but how did she access her acct previously? thumbprint. no password memory whatsoever. pretty fair, id say? she texted me asking for the last 4 of her SSN this morning. nobody picked up her call to the bank(?) until she called them in the car with me. the form required to change login credentials when u dont have account access required those digits and a form of photo id. no ability to access it from her ADP because the pw changed at some point but it still took her print.

reminder. shes homeless and out of school. she has a birth certificate but thats where my certainty of her documentation ends. ive run into this before where i wanted to start a real bank acct for her but they require legally viable photo id and even non driver state ids require 1. proof of permanent residence (X) and 2. proof of enrollment in school for minors (X) at the MVA.

so anyways weve kinda hit a wall with the limitations her unsupportive parents / guardians have provided! its taking up a large portion of my emotional, mental, physical, and temporal space in life right now so i wanted to make a post about it. my little bandaid desire is to at least set her up with a new phone which i estimate would be $200 minimum for actual 'verified third party vendors of used phones' but ugh i didnt budget for this.

oh the support seeking! if you know me and wanna ease the load on my sisters shoulders a but, id be grateful for some help raising funds for a new phone! ill include some $ links. if were unacquainted but youre reading this anyway and have a spare $5 wed love the support! thanks for reading :)

cashapp: $rmwperfect | venmo: @rmwperfect | paypal: @37q

#fuck it ill edit links in since its not letting me paste anything

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kithtaehyung · 2 years

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Was gonna do this in order of how offended I am but it’s really hard to choose…so this is just in order of how I saw them 😐

1) Him tracing ily on her skin 😭 why did my brain immediately think of him doing this before he has built up the courage to say it out loud, like he can’t say it out loud yet but he’s bursting at the seams so he just- ✋🏽😭

2) I was expecting the 3tan yoongi violence but this cannot be tolerated 😐😐😐😐😐 #1 post I’m mad about as of rn. This Tae is illegal 😭😭😭😭 (spoiler alert: it gets worse 😭)

3) Lmao no but Ryensuela for the Nicholasname 😂☠️ (I am still partial to when I see people call you Ryen Kith Taehyung in all caps, it makes me giggle every time). Didn’t have a particular post to tag for this, just know I thoroughly enjoyed seeing people try to lengthen your name 😂 nicknames are my fave.

4) Sad I missed this ask game but the ones asked were so good 😂😭 (wish there were more sneaky 3tan bro and jk ones but it was still a good mix 👀)

5) I’m sorry wut is this 😐 this is going pretty high on the list. You teasing a Netflix and chill 3tan drabble and bros identity? 🤨

6) I- 😐😐😐😐 your audacity has reached a peak once again 😭 PEAK I SAY agahsdklggl

7) 😳😳😳 this should be illegal. How dare you throw this out into the world.

8) Nope 🙅🏽‍♀️ Absolutely not. Nopenopenopenope. Nope 😐. If I refuse to acknowledge it did this really happen??? 🫢🫢🫢 I-

9) AND I DIDNT THINK IT COULD GET WORSE THEN IT DID 😭😭😭 RYEN! Explain yourself 😐😭 *aggressively shakes tree* agshdkdlgg

10) 👁👄👁 GET BACK HERE 😭 you and your damn tags IM AT MY WITS END ISTG

11) Not the Wendy’s 😂☠️☠️☠️ I’m sorry…but this is just SO funny to me. After the horny hours too. The timing is UNREAL 😈 not so much fun when you’re not the one being the menace is it (Also having the live in those screenshots is taking me out, his face in them is perfect 😂😂😂☠️)

12) IM SORRY WHAT!!!?????? I missed a whole ass huge spoiler 😳😳😳 (I’ve said it a million times but I’ll say it again, your tags I- asgdjjfkg YOU WANNA FIGHT OR??? What do you mean is it!??? You literally said “highly requested FULL basketball scene coming up” DONT PLAY COY NOW 😭)

13) Okay yeah…I…I have…a lot of…feelings…about this 🙂🙂🙂. This is fine. Everything is…fine 🙂 (AGAIN THE TAGS WE’RE GONNA THROW HANDS)

14) 😐☹️☹️☹️ this was uncalled for, unprovoked and just RUDE

15) ☠️ I’m not even sure I have anything more to say than just 😩😩😩😩

16) Ryen…😐 This…this takes #1…the teaser!!??! Agshhsjfkflg 😐 don’t talk to me….DONT EVEN LOOK AT ME 😭🥴 (wait help I just saw the estimated help date nooooo, you can’t do this to me I’m ✨unprepared✨. THIS IS WHAT YOU MEANT WHEN YOU SAID SOMETHING I HAVENT GOTTEN TO YET. Never been more thankful for a delay in release dates, if I came back to a full ass YOONJIN fic dropped I would have yeeted my phone off a balcony)

17) 😐😐😐😐 uncalled for and unprovoked pt 2 ☹️

18) Last peak of audacity reached…the way you tagged this 🍊🍊🍊…SEE…this is how I knew. Just knew it smh 😐. When I saw you were conveniently releasing 3tan9 visuals on jk’s bday 😒

And on that last note…guys…I’ve been saying this but 3tan jk is gonna be at the release party duh!!!! For how long and what interactions we get 👀 only Ryen knows but IM READY 😈

And this has been ‘what you missed in practically 2 weeks on this godforsaken blog’…hope this puts things in perspective 😐. It was a rollercoaster of emotions let me tell you, 10/10 do not recommend going through it in a short time span…it’s…✨a lot✨ 🥴😂 and you’ve created monsters. We’re all menaces™ 😂

Let’s hope tumblr doesn’t randomly eat this ask bc I lowkey don’t wanna hyperlink everything again 😂🤧

OH MY GOD MIKAYLA LMFAOOOO okay… yeah…. We… don’t have any excuses for what the fck you missed🥴

I was gonna respond to all of these when I realized that it’s much more hilarious to just make a scholarly blanket statement and say “If you’re gonna skip, just know you have a lot of make up work to come back to.”💀💀💀

But seriously, we missed you so much! Definitely would’ve been more screaming involved (and faster justice for Friends!!!) All the tags screaming I am CACKLINGGGG HAHAHAH you know to read the tags!! Always read the tags!! Yoonjin piece is still in the works but I’ve realized that I wanna make it perfect so🤪 Stay fcking tuned.

The theory you have is super interesting so we’ll see what happens in the next parts👀👀

#ryensuela here!!#mikayla!#asks:3tan #asks:hitrecord #*ryenfictalk #mailbox💌

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ask-neith · 11 months

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4, 10, and 29 from the Marvel OC ask list?

4- What type of powers and/or skills do you have? How did you get them?

Well firstly there is stuff I learned the normal way(as opposed to being Senseied). Beyond things so normal and obvious I take it for granted and am blind to, I am a a mean cooker, three-and-half lingual, swim especially well(even though I feel I am less buoyant than normal), have more than decent shooting accuracy, and can juggle for a couple minutes without dropping stuff.

Then there are powers I got through a spider. I am stronger and more durable(ish), more agile and have better reflexes, I can somehow stick to surfaces(which includes glass so ???), and I, mmm, feel danger or potential danger(but no reasons for it) like some additional color of the world(except all-round). I think that covers it all, for now? Oh right, I can shoot webs, although it better goes through a technical device we made.

10- Describe what your world looks like. Is it colorful? Black and white?

Oh it is so colorful it sometimes hurts. Colored hair and violate-my-eyes(good) clothes are so much more common that a decade ago, as are flowery lawns and colored houses. Umm, I am not sure what else to describe? Unless you want me to go all "the grass is green, the sky is white with streaks of yellow and pink during the dawn, ..." and so on.

29- Name a few of your current villains– who’s making up your rogues gallery?

I will name them all(even those I didnt meet yet but confirmed to be local), but will limit myself to shorter descriptions, if I may.

Raiju is a lightning guy that can shoot lightnings, teleport through them and discorporate into them(which seems to get him out of my webs? Not fair). He might be my best(or worst) villain because I simply have no idea how to approach him so far, even if he sticks to non-lethal zaps that nonetheless leave me a twitching mess.

Shocker is a thief that can uhh resonate stuff apart with his gauntlets. And do powered punches/jumps(so I suspect kicks also). That one might just be my easiest one, unless he has some more cards up his sleeve.

Vulture is an energy vampire that can fly(and has apparently decorative wings which he only seems to flap to show he can) and supercharge himself. I am going to be fair, I dont think I`ll encounter him any time soon, he is a sneaky and fast one, and even this info comes from purely accidental meets.

Sepia, a consummate shapeshifter that is also incredibly fast moving human-eater. Looks like sort-of human except with tentacles and stripe colored(sometimes polka dot colored).

Tombstone is a leader of elusive but everpresent organised crime, who is whole lot stronger and more sturdy, and can at will turn his current body to stone(which quickly decays into dust, so no collectible statues or using them to track him) while "respawning" somewhere around but not too close.

Tinkerer supplies advanced tech to criminals, both solo luck-seekers and Tombstones mooks. Traps and baits dont work, hecker uses long-range portals. Still, he is only in it for money, so there should be a sensible approach to him.

Green Goblin. Again(?) I dont know what his deal is, but he is body-boosted, can induce enormous fear, anomalously jump and glide(gravity suppression?), and conjure explosive projectiles.

Mysterio seems to be a hypnotist and can make tangible(if still frail) illusions that fall apart into mist that was estimated as "dangerous", no further explanation. Mostly acts through proxies, but did show up personally occasionally, no rhythm to that.

Punisher is a normal(question mark?) but incredibly trained person that would find their place in Aretes if not for their bloody vendetta against - apparently - whoever they deem werent punished by law enough? Its a problem to be a shady, big-fine-paying entity without them coming after you. No powers demonstrated, but arsenal shown hints at influential backer. Might actually be several people, even another organisation.

Lastly, Ill Will who seems to be in it for pure giggles and sense of superiority. A mage with specialisation in curses so vicious affected have to call around-top-tier counter-mages(which arent that available, as you can guess). Still, quick to exhaust, so provided with too many targets she tends to go for escape route. I think there was a talk of providing heroes with counter-amulets, but even now thats a work of long time.

Plus "bad" Dragonhearts, plus discovered Hydra mooks, plus remains of Osenseis organisation. We arent overwhelmed, no, but... Still not a cakewalk, even with all the support.

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awellboiledicicle · 2 years

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The unfortunate thing about the twins and Echo meeting for the first time is that it's going to be kinda hilarious.

She hops on this island, starved for human interaction but convinced the smoke she saw from their fire was just lightning or something. Being deep in the island harvesting routine by now-- but not so much as to not note that the coconuts are all gone, or that there are footprints-- she just gets to work. Kinda talking herself out of other people.

The twins meanwhile have been living in a cave for like three days, through a storm, and are still having Oh Right i/he was Missing For Years feelings. And it's an awkward time because their estimates on how long are different, because time is weird. And now they're on an island and they dont recognize any of the pokemon, and their pokeballs wont open and the berries all loom weird. AND someone obviously used to live there, and doesnt now. Just three days of trying to explore, figure shit out, and awkward conversations.... when suddenly they hear someone chopping wood. And a tree falling.

Well, Ingo knows that's what it is. Emmet is sensitive enough to noise that he just reads it as "loud in a bad way". He agrees with his brother after a second, but it's not something he recognizes instantly.

So they bank the fire--- they JUST got some fronds and bark dry enough to light-- and go check it out.

They round a rock and theres this random woman hauling a whole fucking tree down the beach toward a raft. And adding the tree to a pile of them.

Two things happen at once: Echo yelling in surprise, and the twins just being so happy to see someone dressed vaguely modern that they yell a greeting.

Then a beat of silence as Echo tries to figure out how to people again and the twins try to figure out if she understood their Galarian (continental). And then Emmet taps his customer service charisma and just.

"Hello! I am Emmet, this is Ingo! We are verry lost!"

They come further onto the beach while Echo ponders if putting down the axe will help or hurt the situation. Ingo takes the lead at her appraising look.

"Apologies for any surprise. Can you understand us? We're not sure where we are."

A smile now, because she remembered that smiling at people meant friendly. Usually. She didnt drop the axe, though she did relax her shoulders. A nod.

"I speak English, yeah." She didnt quite understand the puzzled look the twins shot one another, but that never stopped her before. "I don't have a heading handy, but if you gave me a few to finish up planking I could get one."

A small squeak.

"Ah jeez, were you guys going to take the palms? We can split it- I just needed enough for the cook fire." She gestured to the pile of trees and then to her raft while looking deeply concerned. The twins wondered why this was the concern and not the fact she'd found two random people stranded on an island. She perked up after a second though. "Oh! But if you need a heading, you're going someplace right? Anywhere dry?"

"Erm. No, we don't need the trees. Or a heading. We arrived at this stop rather unexpectedly, and are not sure how to proceed." Ingo took her puzzled expression as a need of explanation. "What is the name of this place, and would you know how we could depart toward a more favorable station?"

"We're stranded. Please help." Emmet clarified helpfully, and Ingo nodded. "We do not sail."

"What." Now she looked fully confused, and honestly a little concerned. “Did you.. wreck? Where’s your captain, if you don’t sail?”

The twins exchanged another look. Ingo tried again.

“No we-- We don’t know. We were going somewhere else, and...” The corner of his mouth twitched as he tried to figure out how to word it. “We have no captain, nor do we know why you expect us to have one. I assure you that we are entirely as confused as you are about our current predicament. Complicated would be understating matters, but that’s--”

“God has shit aim.” Emmet piped up, earning a somehow deeper frown from his brother. He didn’t seem to care that much. “And we need help. Do you have water? I would like water.”

True, their fluid intake had been expressly fruit based on the island. And also true, Arceus appeared to have shit aim, but he didn’t need to SAY it. That said, this woman with an axe seemed much more relaxed at Emmet’s request. For her part, Echo was now running with the assumption that these Emmet and Ingo guys were just exceptionally dehydrated. A reassuring smile.

“I can do water. You two wait here, okay?” She trotted down the beach a bit, before turning back with a hop. “Oh! And i’m Echo! Nice to meet you!”

And off she went again, before returning with honestly the most patchwork plastic bottles of water the twins had ever seen. They’d personally pulled trash out of a river that looked better. Echo did not appear to be bothered by this, gesturing with her own bottle in a sort of cheers motion.

She did appear bothered with how fast Emmet undid the lid and knocked back a swig... followed by promptly gagging on it and losing most of it down his front. Ingo patted his back through the following coughing fit, his own bottle dropped unceremoniously onto the sand.

“Just go slow, ay? No use making yourself sick--”

“It just tastes so bad--” More coughing. “Why?”

If Ingo hadn’t then watched her look puzzled and sniff at her own bottle, then take his and do the same, he’d have assumed something sinister. If anything he was more dismayed by the fact she proceeded to take a thoughtful swig out of both their bottles before shrugging and putting them back in the sand. The mild glare Emmet shot her was met with an equally mild look of embarrassment.

“Tastes about as good as i can get right now. The palms over the distiller might be going off, sorry.” She rocked back and forth on her heels, watching Emmet recover with a slight frown. “But it should be good to drink, certainly better than the salt. If you’ve been out here a while without fresh water, i don’t know how picky we can be getting you refreshed.”

“We’re not ungrateful.” Ingo insisted, retrieving his bottle once Emmet had managed to retain himself. She nodded in response, which he felt was a good indicator she wasn’t offended. “It’s been a very long week.”

Another look of sympathy, which reminded him of the stares he got when Lady Irida had first taken him into the clan. Well meaning, if a bit baffled by his whole deal. This, at least, he knew how to handle. By drinking the water.

The taste wasn’t... great, but it wasn’t much worse than the well water in Jubalife or the melted snow in the icelands. The bulk of the taste, he assumed, was the plastic bottle. Like the pump pipes they’d seen earlier, it was melted together here and there with other pieces of plastic, and wrapped in a much thicker hunk of the stuff that was also melted on. There was also just a hint of saltiness that kept it from being entirely ignorable, but he wasn’t sure if that was the container or the water itself. Given this person seemed to be their only real way off the island, he assumed he’d get used to it. Emmet managed to take another drink--though his bottle was now only half full, less the spill when he dropped it and Echo’s test sip--and kept it down with willpower. He wondered, briefly, if this was better or worse than tap water in southern Unova.

“Why don’t you two come with me? I could use a few more hands, and you could use not being marooned.” She seemed to take their mirrored raised eyebrow as an argument, rather than them pondering if it was that easy. “You don’t have to, of course-- but you said yourself you’ve no captain or raft.”

“That would be extremely kind.” Ingo nodded and Emmet shortly after. “Though I will warn you--we know nothing of sailing. And we were telling the truth about not knowing where we are. We were supposed to be heading to Nimbasa, in Unova. Are you familiar with that place?”

The look of worry flashed across Echo’s face again, though for all the twins knew it could have been thought.

“No, but we can take a look at the charts once i’m done with the island.” She seemed to be appraising their actual appearances now, and hummed. “Though the way you’re dressed, i might just not have met someone from there.”

The hungry look that flashed through her eye reminded Ingo a bit too much of Volo for a moment, before it was replaced with something more like when the professor had first asked him about the Hisuian sneasel. It was then waved off, before she gestured to the raft peacefully bobbing up and down where it wasn’t touching the sand.

“We can talk more once you two get out of the sun for a bit. Go take a seat in the cabin, i’ll meet you in there once i’m done.”

And thus the twins sat in the doorway of her little shack on a raft, drinking terrible but potable water, and wondering what the fuck was happening.

And i’m deeply amused.

#seafaring au

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crossovereddie · 3 years

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Actually, here is an alternative thing for you to occupy your time with, and a question I have been meaning to ask you for a while. I have finished 911 finally! So I'm ready for the new season. And I wonder, realistically, what do you think the roadmap would be for a buddie endgame?

I absolutely see how their story has been framed and filmed in a lot of parallels to how a romantic storyline would be set out. But there has been no outright mention of either of them being bi - although the conversation about Maddy setting Buck up with whassisface was very casual and could very easily have been an example of canonically bi Buck - and they are both at the end of season 4 in 'relationships' with women.

So, in your estimation, what's the timeline? What's the transition? How do they go about this and how long does it take? I wanna know your thoughts 👀

okay yes i have lots of thoughts on this and it's actually one of my fave questions i get asked. I've always watched a lot of tv shows so I'm just estimating on what I've seen before and what I would personally do. IMO this love story is a slow burn. We only have four seasons so far and only three of those seasons have Eddie in them. This unsurprisingly got long so ill put it under the cut.

So I'll go by seasons bc to me its important to look at everything that has happened so far by seasons and by love interests and not as a whole. Its the best way i can form a timeline that I think would make the most sense and why

S1: So we don't get any hints at Buck being anything other than straight and I think this is because he was supposed to be. They hadn't planned for Eddie yet and they definitely hadn't planned for the chemistry Oliver and Ryan were gonna have. S1 Buck was this reckless kid who didn't take anything serious. He was definitely super immature. Then he meets Abby and he starts to get serious about his job and his love life. I'm not gonna say "Abby changed him" because she didnt. He saw the person he was and the person he was becoming and decided on that change himself.

S2: Eddie!!!! So we get introduced to this army medic turned firefighter in the least heterosexual way. Then Buck is angry because Eddie is hot and really good at his job. they work together and Eddie compliments Buck and now they're smiley bffs. Seriously wtf was all that? Anyway this is all sus bc from what ive seen before in other shows when a main love interest leaves and a new main character replaces them, that means something. JLH replaced Connie Britton as far as big name actress but i really believe Eddie replaced Abby as far as importance in Buck's life. Do i think they brought him in with the intentions of turning him into a LI? No but they sure fueled the narrative from the get go. I think they saw fans reactions and started testing the waters.

Moving on to LIs in this season. We find out Eddie has a kid and the mother is not in the picture (eddie made sure buck knew that right away). Then later on we find out he's technically still married. shannon comes back and we get Eddie finally getting to confront this head on. He tries to get his family back together for the sake of his son. Its big for Eddie's character bc all he does and all he's ever done is for his son. Then Shannon asks for a divorce then she dies bringing this arc to an abrupt end and leaving eddie heartbroken.

meanwhile Buck is still waiting for Abby. Then he finally accepts that shes not coming back and decides to move on. He goes right back to being "Buck 1.0" with Taylor and feels bad about himself because that really isnt him anymore. He wants a real relationship. So then Ali calls and asks him on an actual date and he agrees. This is his first try at a relationship after a heartbreak. in tv these don't usually work out but are used to develop the main character's growth. We don't really see much of her but she breaks up with him so.

S3: This is Eddie finally dealing with his feelings/guilt season. This is also the season I think we really see how important Buck is to the Diaz boys. S2 had cute buckley-diaz family moments but those could still be interpreted as a best friend and his best friend's kid. This season though... after the tsunamic episode was when i really started to fully believe buddie was going canon. This season is solidifying their bond not only as Buck and Eddie but as Buck Eddie and Christpher. As I'm writing this I realized neither of them really has a love interest in this season do they? Ana is introduced but then is clearly presented as definitely NOT the right choice for eddie and especially for Chris. Then they counter that with Buck helping Eddie build a skateboard for Chris that he can use as opposed to Ana's ablest remarks about how he can't do it so just move on to something else. Then we get Buck's reaction in Eddie Begins. Buck has seen his team his friends his family get hurt on the job before but he has never reacted the way he did when it was Eddie in danger. Again solidifying just how much these two mean to each other. Don't even get me started on this season being when Eddie changes his will offscreen. Anyway we get Abby back and Buck finally gets the closure from that relationship that he needs to move forward into a serious relationship.

Now S4: jfc s4....IMO this is the only logical season to get the ball rolling on Buddie and they sure did that with 4x14 despite everything else. So i never thought they would be the first serious relationship for each other after the heart break theyve both experienced. It wouldn't be fair to their character developments. Buck tries dating Veronica and that clearly doesnt work but we know hes now open to dating again. We get Buck Begins where we see why Buck is the dare devil he is. The only way he got his parents attention as a kid was to put himself in danger. They bring back taylor and how to they ultimately get together after she friendzones him? She thinks hes in danger and suddenly wants him. As much as i hate it this is really gonna be a relationship where Buck finally stands up for himself and sees his own worth and realizes he deserves more. He deserves someone who sees him and loves him for who he is. He deserves to be chosen, something Abby Ali his parents dont do and what i think taylor wont end up doing. I feel like shes gonna choose her career over him. Maybe not in a "I'm breaking up with you" way but maybe she takes a new job and want to do LD (hes tried that twice and it didnt work for him. hes not gonna want that) or she could ask him to go with her but he wont. His family is in LA. His job is in LA. Eddie and Chris are in LA and he won't leave them. Then we have Eddie finally deciding to move on and try dating again so they bring back ana. To me it's not gonna work out so I'm not bothered at all lmao. It's interesting that they'd choose her though. Someone we already know Eddie doesn't trust with his son. There's also more buckley-diaz family scenes of them being coparents. The hildy episode, Chris running to Buck when hes mad at eddie, Buck being the one to tell Chris Eddie got hurt, then Buck staying with Chris and taking on the guardian role without him even knowing just how much that role really does belong to him. He didn't do it out of obligation. He didn't do it because he was asked to. He did it because he thought it would be best for Chris. Finally to 4x14. This is by far the biggest "Oh shit this is it. This is the beginning of buddie". We find out Eddie changed his will a year ago and has just been sitting on this info. I think Eddie knew back then what it meant but he wasn't in the right mindset to accept what it means so he kept it to himself. I think he finally started allowing himself to go there during treasure hunt. The man was jealous yall. Carla coming back and her comment about doing whats best for him and not chris is his oh shit moment. I think he wouldve broken up with Ana a few days after that if he had the time lol. He gets caught up in the mother/son sl then this poor mf gets shot by a sniper. The way that whole scene was filmed btw was not in a bff way. That was a lover watching his beloved almost die in front of him. Buck again puts himself down and Eddie decides this is the moment. He needs Buck to see how important he is. He wants buck to know how loved he is. So he sits there talking himself up to it and finally lets Buck know just how big of a part he is in Eddie's family. Buck's previous scene is him saying he wants someone who wants him back then here is Eddie saying he needs him...Chris needs him. wtf.

So with S5: I think Eddie knows and Buck has a feeling but he's not sure so what i would do is spend s5 with Eddie basically showing Buck his feelings but not exactly getting in the way of Buck's new relationship because Buck has to be the one to make that choice. Id also have chris feeling the different shift with buck having a gf like he did with Eddie. This newfound info wasnt just dropped on us for a "Aww so sweet" moment. This will business is gonna be a part of a bigger storyline. I'm hoping its with Eddie's family during maybe 5b.

So what I think would be the best timeline for canon buddie is 5a eddie already having either broken up with ana or is gonna break up with her, Buck choosing himself and ending things with Taylor by midseason finale, them bringing in Eddie's family in 5b and maybe then being when Eddie confesses his feelings for Buck. Then 6a we could get them walking on egg shells around each other not really knowing what to do bc this is all so new for both of them. This could bring just the right amount of comedy and angst especially them awkward and flustered around each other at work. A big blowup can happen between them for added angst (maybe an arguement before one of them or both of them is put in danger) then a midseason finale kiss. Then trying to find the balance between their personal relationship and their work relationship during 6b.

I don't know how long Fox shows last but procedurals can last a long time. I'm not sure thats gonna be the case for 911 especially with all the main cast staying that long so i think this would give us at least a whole season (S7) of canon buddie.

As far as then being presented as straight, there's been more seeds planted about buck being bi. A few i can remember off the top of my head: all of 2x1 lmao, maddie's comment about bucks boy crush on eddie, buck hinting at thinking eddie is cute when he thinks maddie is talking about him, the christmas elf, the comments on the instagram livestream, idk if youve watched it or not but TK's comment to Buck in the crossover episode, and like you mentioned Maddie's casual comment about setting him up with Josh. All we really know about Eddie's love life is he married Shannon when they were young and is trying with Ana so it could turn into a whole storyline for him.

I'm so sorry this is so long and took forever but i I hope i actually answered your question and didnt just get lost in rambles lmao.

#oh god that took me way too long lol #eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie #911onfox #is this meta?#wtf even is that #buddie meta #??#idk

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astralaffairs · 4 years

Text

freedom of the press 05.2 | thomas jefferson

title: freedom of the press 05.2, or the point of no return

pairing: thomas jefferson x reader

words: literally 20k. remember when my estimate for both parts of 05 was 20k total?? hahahah

warnings: shitty weather, sexual tension finally comes to a head, mild embarrassment, death mentions, trashing on politicians, implied sex 👀

desc: the 2020 republican presidential frontrunner is an obnoxious, morally bankrupt people-pleaser, but what happens when you become the person he’s most eager to please?

tags: @stargazelaurens @ivory-haired-queens @exoticxchicken8 @assbuttstyles777 @superbarriobrothers @distinguishedpotsticker @fukaaaaaaaa @hereforthepsyche-assessment @ivetoldamillionlies @fangirl570 @thealaddinkid @lasciviouspeach @snazzydoesthings @shy-and-awkward-daveed @rachelhermionerose @soft-weeb-s @gryffinclxw @anamrnk @daveeddiggsit @ayayayayana @marinovakovich @cryinghazelnutt @thefandomgirl03 @a-hopeless-fan @cloudywlw @tinywhim @lolidunnoaboutnow @siriusorionblackiii— hope i didnt miss anyone; lmk if you want to be added!!

IT WASN'T A day later when Y/N saw Thomas again, but that time, she was in no mood for his antics.

It was one of her first days back to work at the diner, and while she'd known it was busy during lunch and dinner, she had entirely forgotten how overwhelming the crowd was during weekend rush hours. So, unfortunately, that Sunday was a wakeup call.

She'd already been on her feet for five hours; it was just after 1 PM, and she'd elected to take the opening shift that morning (it meant she could leave earlier, and that was good enough for her). However, with the sea of customers that continued to leak into the restaurant, her exhaustion was growing and growing. Moreover, Jac had let it slip to her that the tenant who lived above the diner had just moved out, and she was stuck in her head trying to figure out a way to bring it up to Mira that didn't reek of desperation. Her focus was entirely elsewhere, by then.

"Hi, what can I get you?" She'd just rushed back from making two cappuccinos and still had to get back to the ovens to make sure her bread didn't burn, so with how preoccupied she was, she hardly noticed who was standing before her. He, however, realized immediately.

"Oh... Hey." Thomas's eyes were wide as he looked down at Y/N, but her reaction to him was nothing but expectant. He cleared his throat, trying to bury how stunned he was, and she turned her attention to the screen as he gave her his lunch order. She didn't look up as a grin began to grow on his lips. By then, she'd obviously taken note of his presence, but she was far too tired to care. "So you're a barista now?"

He quirked up an eyebrow as she frantically typed in his order. It seemed to be as complicated as possible, and she would be lying if she said she didn't suspect that it was intentional. She huffed. "We can't all live in penthouses on Capitol Hill," she bit back at him irritably, and his expression went from playful to surprised.

"Hey, now." His tone was lightly offended as he furrowed his brow. He swiped his credit card, eyeing her warily as her stare bore into the keypad before her. "Was just gonna comment on your many talents, but alright."

She sighed as she met his eyes with a tired gaze. "Name for the order?"

He furrowed his brow. "Seriously?" She stared at him expectantly, though the corners of her lips twitched up almost imperceptibly. He rolled his eyes. "It's Thomas."

"And how do you spell that?"

"Like you've never written it before?"

Y/N was growing progressively more amused, tongue-in-cheek as she looked up at him, but her smile was well-suppressed. She wasn't going to let up. "I'm sure I don't know what you mean." She raised her eyebrows, silently challenging him to call her out. However, he'd apparently decided to play along instead.

"I'll let you guess that one, Ms... " He trailed off, squinting at her nametag, and she was having trouble swallowing the laugh that had begun to bubble up in her throat. She pursed her lips, trying not to find the whole ordeal endearing. "Y/N?" He looked up with an eyebrow raised, as though to confirm the pronunciation, and she gave him a sarcastic smile.

"Your order will be out shortly."

He grinned. Despite the irony in her expression, his was heavy with mirth. "Thanks so much, sweetheart; be sure to vote Jefferson in the primaries." He added a wink to his words as he put his wallet away. She rolled her eyes, biting back a scoff.

"I'll keep it in mind."

She finished sending in his order as he walked off with a grin before she retreated back into the kitchen, the other barista appearing to momentarily relieve her of her cashier duties. She was still in the thick of the lunch rush, and she couldn't lose track of her priorities -- especially since they were running quickly out of lemon bars, and it was rising unfortunately rapidly in importance for her to finish the yet-to-be-baked batch. Not that it contributed to her decision to move to the kitchens or anything, but she also couldn't stamp out the heat rising to her cheeks or her unyielding smile. (She couldn't explain them, either.)

"What's got you all smiley?" Jac raised an eyebrow as he packaged carry-out orders, and she quickly pressed her lips into a thin line. She slid the uncooked pan of lemon bars out of the refrigerator.

"Just glad to be back at the diner." She turned away from him with her dismissive excuse. The oven was always preheated for one reason or another, so she just slid in her pan, quickly withdrew her finished loaves of bread, and continued on, but Jac wasn't ready to let it go just yet.

"So it doesn't have anything to do with--?"

"I've gotta go back to mixing drinks, Jac; the line is a mile long," she cut him off abruptly, and he deadpanned. His pointed glance out the kitchen window toward the table where Thomas was sitting said all it needed to, and though she didn't miss it, she ignored it. "Let me know if you need me back here for anything. Can you take the lemon bars out when they're done?"

"Mm-hmm."

She ignored his suspicion as she rushed back out to brew another pot of coffee. She was still at work; she couldn't let herself ruminate on a two-minute interaction when there were customers who'd been waiting for at least half an hour, and so she let it slip to the back of her mind as she jumped from one task to the next, until finally--

"Order up for--" She heard a pause as she glanced toward the other end of the counter, seeing her coworker squinting at the receipt, before calling out, "Secretary Jefferson?"

When he went to collect his food, Y/N was perhaps overly pleased with herself, but she was also wholly unashamed of it, especially as she couldn’t help but notice his amused smile. He raised an eyebrow as he passed her, and she met his eyes brightly.

"Enjoy your food, Secretary Jefferson."

"That's a new way to spell 'Thomas,' huh?" he commented dryly, a brow raised, and she shrugged.

"Gave it my best guess."

"I'm sure you did."

---------------

UP UNTIL THEN, Y/N had spent the past week letting her writing take a bit of a back seat, her focus instead on her more recent financial crisis. However, it seemed Ashley wasn't going to let her off that easy. She'd reminded her on an abundance of occasions (more than twice a day over text and whenever they crossed paths in the office) that researching everything there was to know about Thomas Jefferson was still her job, that she'd still need to go to campaign events -- it as only a matter of time until the other shoe dropped. To her dismay, the 'other shoe' apparently meant she was required to make another day trip to Charlottesville, and it may have been one of her only work commitments, but she wasn't going to refrain from grumbling about it.

The only benefit of the situation was that her gracious host and temporary landlord also happened to be going, so she didn't have to go miserably navigate another black-tie political fundraiser alone.

When Lafayette pulled up in a Mercedes, she rolled her eyes. They were going to spend almost as much time in the car as they were at the venue, but it also appeared he wasn't going to let her slip under the radar as she'd hoped.

The mocking went both ways, though. Where he was excessively flashy, she was astoundingly fixated on her own comfort, rather than style. Lafayette laughed outright when she came to his car in a formal dress and a pair of slippers, pearls and pajama pants. (It was the middle of a blizzard, though, for fuck's sake. She didn't intend to freeze, and she certainly didn't intend to try and traipse through the mounting snow in four-inch heels and stockings.)

The ride south was painless if she didn't consider Lafayette's substandard taste in music or how poor visibility was. (She wasn't behind the wheel, so the latter wasn't her problem.) When they reached Monticello, though, she wasn't sure painless was how she could've described the rest of her night.

It was already dark when they arrived, the snowfall not having let up for a moment, and she whined about having to trade out her slippers for her heels, almost unwilling to sacrifice her pajama pants. However, entering the mansion had her almost immediately forgetting her strife.

Monticello was a grand estate. Staircases curved up either side of the entrance hall, coats being taken near one wall as everyone was funneled into the grand parlor -- not before passing the first of many elaborate chandeliers, though. The atmosphere was alight; the air held the warm, sweet scents of cinnamon and cherry wine -- at least, by Y/N's best, unrealistically-specific guess, but regardless of whether she was correct, she'd already begun to salivate.

"Shall we sit?" Lafayette offered her his arm, which she took, not for the sake of appearances, but because her feet were absolutely killing her, and she was desperate to take a load off. She looked up at him gratefully.

"Yes, please."

---------------

MUCH OF THEIR evening was uneventful. Lafayette socialized while Y/N networked; he drank four glasses of wine as she worked through her first; he pulled people to his sides to sing with him to the music of the cellist at the back of the room, and she took vigorous notes about the statuses of every campaign patron she interacted with. Needless to say, they had rather disparate experiences.

"Oh, Y/N!"

She stumbled backward as she was all but jumped on the edge of the parlor, being pulled into an enthusiastic embrace, and her eyes were wide when she recognized the smiling face of her assailant.

"Dolley! Hey!" She pulled away with a laugh, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. The woman had become increasingly affectionate as Y/N had begun to see her more often, and if she'd been comfortable hugging her when they first met, then being tackled that evening did seem to logically follow. "How are you?"

She shrugged. "Been better, been worse. I'm at another campaign event, so that should tell you all you need to know." She checked her hip lightly against Y/N's with that, wearing a playful grin, and Y/N couldn't help but laugh.

"You and me both."

"I take it you're here on work, then?" Dolley took a sip of her wine, an eyebrow raised. (Y/N was rather impressed that the glass hadn't sloshed all down her dress, what with Dolley immediately ambushing her upon entering her line of vision.)

Y/N sighed. "I always seem to be. Not even allowed to get drunk at these events. How fair is that?" The complaint held little true bitterness, though, with the playful glint in her eyes.

Dolley looked indignant on her behalf. "You poor thing; they've really put you through the wringer, huh?"

"You don't know the half of it." Y/N's mock exhaustion provoked a laugh from Dolley, who pursed her lips, ultimately shrugging.

"You did gain me from it though." Her matter-of-fact tone made Y/N roll her eyes. "Count your blessings, Y/N."

"Really. I can be so ungrateful." She shook her head, upholding her exasperated facade, though when a grin split through Dolley's mask of disappointment, Y/N couldn't help the corners of her lips quirking up.

"What's tonight's article about, anyway? A critique of the baked brie? 'Thomas Jefferson Doesn't Know How to Throw a Party: An Exposé'?"

Y/N let out a huff of mirthless laughter. "If only. Instead, I'm supposed to be digging up some of Schrödinger's dirt on the campaign funders. My editor has no idea whether it exists or not, but here I am anyway." She paused with that, cocked her head to the side, pondering the question. "Now that you mention it, though, maybe my true calling was to be a food critic."

"Follow your dreams," Dolley agreed, nodding. "It'd probably be more exciting than this thriller of a crowd."

Y/N laughed at that. While the atmosphere was upbeat, she'd hardly seen any signs of life among its attendees, if she didn't count Lafayette's drunken instrumental karaoke. "What, the over-60 crowd of doctors and lawyers isn't doing it for you?"

Dolley grinned. "That's where you come in, dear."

"Suppose I should be glad to hear it," Y/N sighed as she eyed the room, forcing the false nonchalance into her voice. "Might have to change my exposé to how our prospective second lady is just using me for her own entertainment."

She hummed in agreement. "Mm, be sure to mention how cold and aloof I always am."

"You truly are cruel to me, aren't you?" Y/N met her eyes once again, her gaze wistful.

"Bet your readers will love to hear such a scandal."

"I can see it now," Y/N agreed, holding up her hands to paint the headline as she continued, "'My Toxic Relationship With Dolley Madison. Be Ready for the Articles of Impeachment.'"

As she laughed, a self-content smile adorned Y/N's lips. "What, are you planning to impeach me from the role of 'possible future second lady'?"

"Of course; I figured the implication was obvious," Y/N agreed, making the older woman roll her eyes.

"I wish you the best of luck with that, sincerely."

"I'll need it."

Dolley had been about to respond with a dry quip of her own, but Y/N's gaze was over her shoulder, not realizing she was cutting her off as a smile split through her face. "James!"

(Dolley wasn't too hurt as she learned who she'd been cut off in lieu of.)

The man in question was approaching the pair of them with two full glasses of wine, presumably one to replace what Dolley had just finished throwing back. (Why not? No one was counting.) "Y/N." He gave her a curt nod, amused smile playing at his lips.

"James." It was then Dolley who addressed him, reaching out to grab his extra glass from his hand without a second thought, expression longing, but James pulled it just out of her reach with his eyebrows raised.

"Haven't you had enough?" he asked his wife with a glint in his eye, who in turn huffed, folding her arms.

"Don't you dare," she complained. "I'm here for you; let's not forget."

"Of course not." He leaned down to press a kiss to the side of her head as he handed her the glass. Her small smile altogether betrayed her glare.

"Dunno why I put up with you." She pursed her lips into a pout, and he shrugged.

"Your prerogative, Doll."

She held his warm gaze for a moment longer before she seemed to remember herself, and she took a step back from him, turning to Y/N as her tender expression was immediately replaced with a grin. "Anyway, James, Y/N is here covering the demographics of your and Thomas's donors."

She gestured toward Y/N with the hand still bearing a full glass, and Y/N didn't comment when upwards of a tablespoon sloshed over the rim with the motion. James raised an eyebrow, wearing his forever-unshakeable look of composure. "That right?"

Y/N nodded with a light sigh. "Unfortunately."

"And what have you found, so far?" James's lips were pressed into a thin line at how exhausted she appeared, giving his best effort to hide his amusement.

"Oh, it's been real exciting stuff, hasn't it, dear?" Dolley wore a facade of sincerity as she addressed Y/N, her brow knit as though deep in thought, and Y/N matched her disposition.

"Absolutely scintillating, truly. I've only fallen asleep about fourteen times, which is a real feat for corporate America." She nodded to James earnestly as to corroborate, and he raised an amused eyebrow.

"Consider me impressed." Y/N gave a cheeky grin, and he continued, "Have you enjoyed what you've found thus far?"

She hummed skeptically. "Couldn't tell you. I was asleep the whole time."

That coaxed a laugh out of him, though. "I expect this will be a glowing article, then."

"The less I learn, the better?" She cocked an eyebrow as she glanced around the room, her gaze drifting from one wealthy businessman to the next.

"The less you conclude, the better," he corrected her with a knowing smile as he followed her gaze across the sea of patrons. "Don't assume anyone you speak to has the full story."

"Would you care to comment, then, James?" He turned to her with her eyebrows raised. "Because I really need some actual information, and I really don't want to go interview Jeff Bezos."

"'Jeff Bezos'?" he repeated quizzically, and she shrugged as she looked back to him.

"Seems like his type of crowd, no?" James chuckled, shaking his head as she continued, "What about Steve Forbes? I wouldn't mind getting a quote from him before the writers who actually work at Forbes can manage it."

"We aren't taking donations from CEOs or super PACs, actually."

"Really?" Her eyebrows shot up. "Is this on the record?"

"It can be." He looked mildly pleased with her reaction as she scrambled to create a new audio file on her phone. "We didn't want--"

"Shh! Gimme a minute. It hasn't started recording," she chastised him, and his smile grew at how exasperated she looked. "Alright, now speak."

"I'm a politician, Y/N, not a trained monkey." His indignation was wholly in jest, but she sighed dramatically, looking at him with a deadpan stare.

"Of course you aren't," she consoled him with an air of faux-sympathy, but he seemed to expect -- and rightly so -- that she wasn't done making fun. "You don't tell monkeys to speak; that's for show dogs. I'm not stupid."

He ignored the sigh that accompanied her words, raising an eyebrow. "So you're comparing me to a dog?"

Again, she plastered on a front of fatigue, which only compounded upon his amusement at her demeanor. "James, please, I'm supposed to be the one asking the questions here."

He rolled his eyes, but it seemed he'd exhausted his banter for the time being. "Please, ask away."

"So, back to CEOs and PACs. Why won't you take their donations?"

"We want to show that we're really here, in this, for the people." She cocked her head to the side, lifting the phone to be sure to catch his words, and he continued, "We want to demonstrate that we have no conflict of interest with the corporate sector. And if we don't receive enough donations for the campaign, then we don't have enough support to properly represent the people."

Y/N was silent a moment, brow furrowed, and she nodded ever-so-slightly as she pondered his words. Finally, she admitted, "I didn't think this was that kind of campaign, to be honest."

Her reaction seemed to gratify him; his eyes shone with pride. "You thought we lacked principles, you mean?"

She pursed her lips. "It's... possible that I may have made some assumptions."

"Well, I'm always happy to be the bearer of good news."

"Glad to receive it," she agreed quietly. The look in her eyes was absent, but her momentary trance broke almost before they'd noticed it, and she donned a wide smile. "Maybe you'll actually have some common ground with my readers this week, hm? Truly bridging the partisan divide. What a feat." While her enthusiasm was contrived, her words were sincere, and Dolley grinned.

"We knew you'd come around to our side."

"Woah, woah, woah." She held up her hands in playful defense. "I'm not the one changing sides. This was our political territory first."

"You really think Adams is rejecting corporate funding?" James looked at her expectantly, and she deadpanned.

"John Adams is not representative of his entire party, I can promise you that much."

"But he's the candidate."

"Not yet, he isn't," she resisted, and James raised an eyebrow. "It isn't fair to hold him to the standard of the party nominee when we've hardly started the primaries."

He tilted his head to one side as he regarded her, lips pursed. "Maybe not, but Thomas has been consistent with his values since the very beginning of our campaign."

"Who said Thomas was the standard?"

"What are we callin' me the standard of, now?" The southern drawl caught Y/N off-guard, and she flinched, her eyes widening. She turned reluctantly to see James's ever-so-principled candidate in the flesh, an eyebrow raised and wearing an amused grin as he came up on her left behind Dolley.

"Thomas!" To her relief, Dolley's overwhelming affection bought her a moment to gather her bearings as she pulled him into a bone-crushing hug. "Oh, how are you? I haven't seen you all night!"

Y/N couldn't explain why her throat was suddenly dry as Thomas slowly removed Dolley from where she'd latched onto his shoulders, nor why her stomach turned at the sight of him. He was beaming almost as brightly as Dolley as he held her by the forearms, but Y/N missed what they were saying. Her heart had begun pounding in her ears, and she wiped her sweating palms on her dress as discreetly as she could, tucking her phone back into her purse in an attempt to busy herself with anything other than his presence as he went on to embrace James. She prayed she'd find an opportunity to remove herself from the conversation unnoticed.

Her opportunity never came. She emerged from her bag to see Thomas looking over at her with an eyebrow raised, apparently entertained by how abruptly flustered she'd become. "Y/N."

She pulled the straps of her purse back up to her shoulder with a weak smile. "Thomas. Hey."

She couldn't fully explain her sudden anxiety, didn't know quite why her heart was racing. Maybe it was just that he'd surprised her, or that he'd walked into a conversation that he was the focus of -- or maybe, though she discarded the thought deep into her subconscious, she was simply blindsided by being confronted with his presence in public, still struggling to figure out where it was the two of them stood.

Though she shifted uncomfortably, folding her arms, he didn't look away for another moment. The silence grew deafening, but she didn't have it in her to break his gaze, and she swallowed roughly. When he finally turned his attention from her, he chuckled almost imperceptibly; his smile had broadened.

"So what'd I miss?" He looked brightly over to James, making no effort to conceal how pleased he was. "You all talkin' about how great I am?"

"You're not far off, actually," James informed him, wearing a knowing smile. Thomas's eyebrows shot up. "We were discussing our campaign funding policy."

"And we're not already bein' smacked in the press for it?" He looked at Y/N with mocking disbelief, and she just rolled her eyes. She elected to ignore the heat rising in her cheeks.

"Quite the contrary," James said with a nod. "Y/N was impressed."

James looked contented, but Y/N could almost see Thomas's ego tangibly swelling, and he turned to her with wide eyes, surprise flashing in his gaze. "Is that so?" He sounded as smug as he looked, and Y/N fixed him with a flat stare.

"Are you really looking for acclaim just because you aren't corrupt?" she asked dryly. When he didn't respond, it became increasingly obvious that praise was exactly what he wanted, and she rolled her eyes. "Congrats, Thomas. You must be so proud."

"Trust me, sweetheart, I am." His smirk had taken root, by then; there wasn't anything she could've said or done to knock him down a peg. "Thought it'd be a cold day in hell before you'd support anything my campaign was doin'."

"Then maybe there are a few things you should re-evaluate," she replied, voice stiff, and he laughed.

"Or maybe," he began, raising a cocky eyebrow. "You should re-evaluate your party loyalty. Y'know, the primaries aren't gonna end for another couple months. You aren't runnin' outta time just yet."

"It's gonna take a lot more than that to convince me to register as a Republican, Thomas."

"You'll come around." His words came alongside a wink, which evoked a scowl from her.

"We'll see about that."

"Mm, sounds like a challenge, Y/N," he teased, a singsong lilt in his tone. His eyes narrowed as he took a sip of his drink, and the preying glint in his gaze sent a shudder down the back of her neck. "But I think you'll find I can be very convincing."

---------------

“HEY, HOW MUCH longer do you want to stay?"

She'd finally managed to track down Lafayette near the refreshments table at the back of the room, and by then, he was well past tipsy.

"We cannot leave yet! Where 'ave you been all zis time? You 'ave been missing all ze fun!" He threw an enthusiastic arm around her neck, throwing her off balance a moment, and as his wide grin didn't waver, she sighed.

"Laf, I have to work in the morning."

"Ah, loosen up, first," he pleaded, tugging her alongside him toward the crowd near the music. (She wasn't sure how he'd managed to get a crowd of politicians and businesspeople turnt to Brahms, but she was undeniably impressed.) "You will regret not enjoying yourself, chérie!"

"I think it's a little too late for that," she muttered bitterly, though he was too absorbed with the energy of the room to notice.

"What was zat?"

"Nothing," she told him, louder that time. "I'm gonna go find a bathroom, real quick."

"Non! You are just trying to get away from me!" He was more insistent that time as he pulled her to the cellist, and she huffed.

"C'mon, I'll be back in a minute, okay?" She hesitantly removed his hand from his shoulder, and he gave her a disappointed glance. "I've just had a little too much to drink; gimme a break."

As feeble as her excuse was, seeing as she'd hardly had a drop of anything all night with her effort to stay painfully sober (and their drink options didn't go far past wine), Lafayette released her with a pitying wince. "Ah, no worries. I understand." He hesitated a moment, before adding, "Do you need me to 'old your hair back?"

She couldn't help her laugh at his genuine concern. "I think I'll be alright. Thank you, though."

"Be safe, chérie!" His voice was all but slurred as he pressed a sloppy kiss to the top of her head before wandering off, and she pursed her lips, amused as she watched him go. She would've tried to keep an eye on his blood alcohol content, but he was already drunk to the point of no return, and he seemed too enraptured by what he'd made of the evening to break away for long enough to refill his glass again.

She chuckled lightly, shaking her head as she turned to leave. The first left she took just led her into the dining room, so she turned back toward the entrance hall, trying to find any nook or cranny that split off into a part of the estate where she could have some quiet. She wasn't sure what she was trying to find, necessarily, but she wasn't about to get wasted with Lafayette. One of them had to be able to drive home.

A right, a left, and another right later, she'd gained next to no information on where exactly she was heading, other than that of the sitting room she'd just passed. Her watch told her it was just past 11 PM, and she sighed. She wasn't sure when she'd be able to drag Lafayette back out the front doors, at that rate.

The hall she continued down didn't lead her into a bathroom, to her dismay, but what she saw had her footsteps gradually stalling as her gaze raked down the walls around her. She'd stumbled upon a rather grand library, and one look to her right told her that it would only continue on the further they walked.

She glanced back over her shoulder, and seeing only the empty room she'd just left with its empty armchairs, gave in to her curiosity, wandering toward the side of the room with wonder in her eyes.

The bookshelves reached the ceilings, and every book was bound in aging leather, many torn or cracked at their spines. It had to be some sort of a collection, with the sheer number of novels -- and biographies, and anthologies of poetry, of short stories, even memoirs and atlases, as she realized just moments later. She ran her fingers over the gilded edges as she continued on into the next room.

The hall ended in a small sitting room, one that didn't have nearly the same pomp and circumstance as the rest of the estate, but it was cozy, with its red sofa and armchairs, its wood-burning fireplace and little lamps. The room was illuminated softly with the only light filtering in being from the adjacent rooms and the moon, and the small fireplace cast a warm glow before it.

She bit her lip, wore a small smile as she drew closer to the window at the back of the room. Her gaze was fixated on the bookshelf beside it, and -- as every book, every spine and title came into clear focus -- despite her hesitance, she pushed herself up onto her toes, reaching for a volume more than a foot above her head. Before she could pull it down, though--

"Should've known you'd find the library at some point."

"Thomas!" she squeaked in surprise, recoiling from the bookshelf -- she'd recognized his voice immediately, her eyes wide. She whirled around to see him leaning against the doorway and unconsciously took a step back, feeling much like a child who'd been caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

He didn't look angry, though. In fact, his expression was far from it. His gaze was soft, his arms folded and ankles crossed, and though he looked amused, his smile held none of its frequent mockery despite her clear panic.

He raised an eyebrow, and she blinked hard, immediately began to try to excuse her presence there. "Shit, I... I didn't mean to end up here, honestly, I was just looking for the bathroom, and I--"

"Relax, sweetheart, you're not under fire." He chuckled lightly as he pushed himself off the doorway, walked toward her into the room. "Looks like I'm not the only one who needed some air, huh?"

His gaze flickered down just a moment as she bit her lip. "Really, I was just trying to find the bathroom," her words were quiet, hesitant, and he raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"Oh, really?" She nodded. "Go ahead. It's down the end of the hall and to your right." He tilted his head toward the rooms behind him, and her brows shot up. She hadn't expected to be put on the spot about the excuse -- she'd initially produced it just for Lafayette's sake and wouldn't have thought it needed to be any more thorough than it was.

She was reluctant to take a step forward, and she glanced back over her shoulder at the bookshelf, desperate not to leave after she'd just struck gold, as it were.

"I..."

"You...?" He waited for her to continue, his skepticism never subsiding, and when she didn't, staying rooted to her spot, a smug smile began to play at his lips. "That's what I thought.

She hated how easily he'd called her bluff, and she refused to meet his gaze as it grew increasingly self-satisfied. She scowled. "And what are you doing back here?"

"Didn't I just tell you I was lookin' for some peace and quiet?" He raised an eyebrow. "Or did you think someone just left that fire to try and burn this whole place down? Hm?"

She could feel herself flush as she crossed her arms; she hadn't thought that far into the fireplace that was active long past when it should've been, admittedly. "So you're just trying to run off while you have a parlor full of people giving you copious amounts of money right around the corner?"

"Somethin' like that."

She furrowed her brow. "Why?"

"Do you have any idea how exhaustin' this gets?" He looked down at her, wearing a timid smile. "I've been gettin' grilled all night; you'd be tired too."

Y/N raised her eyebrows, putting on a playful expression of shock. "You're telling me you actually get tired of talking about yourself?"

He cracked a grin. "Nah, just talkin' about the rest of the country. Y'know, the voters, the ones I'm supposed to be representin' or somethin'."

"Be careful, or this is gonna end up in this week's editorial," she warned him, though she couldn't inhibit her smile, and he cocked a brow.

"Oh, yeah? You gonna expose me?" The skepticism was heavy in his words alongside his confident smile, and she shrugged.

"Don't tempt me."

He chuckled, taking a few more steps toward her, the gap between them slowly closing. She swallowed. "Anyway, what's got you tryin' to escape? Lafayette gettin' a little too handsy?"

His teasing quickly had been restored, and she rolled her eyes, ignoring the latter half of the question. "Turns out talking to old philanthropists is just as exhausting when you're the one asking the questions."

"No!" He gasped mockingly, placing a hand on his heart. "You mean workin' till midnight isn't doin' it for you anymore?"

"Oh, don't get me wrong; this is exactly my idea of a good time," she said defensively, though, with the sarcasm in her voice, she couldn't hide her own growing smile. "Usually more of a weekend activity, though. Can't handle this much excitement on a Wednesday."

"And ransackin' my library sounded like a good way to relax?"

"Glad you follow.".

"Find anything you like?" She raised her eyebrows as he further encroached on her space, feeling her breath catch. He stopped beside her, scanning the bookshelf along the back wall, but she was struggling to focus on his words as his shoulder brushed against hers, and she tensed, shied away from the contact. Before she caught herself, her absent stare rested at his lips in the closing proximity; her heart rose to her throat. He raised an eyebrow when she didn't answer, and upon seeing how she was looking at him, he gave a smug grin. "Not includin' me, I mean."

Her eyes widened; she prayed she didn't look nearly as red as she felt as vindication flashed in his eyes. He only continued to watch her expectantly, until finally, she turned alongside him to the books she'd been eyeing. Her gaze didn't take long to find where it'd been fixed before he interrupted her musings.

"I..." She went to reach for the book she was eyeing, but she trailed off as she stopped herself short, glancing nervously back to Thomas. "Can I?"

"Go ahead, sweetheart." He grinned as she stretched up toward the shelf that housed it. She let out a soft, frustrated sigh when she couldn't reach it, pushing herself further up with a hand on a lower shelf, almost jumping for it; all the while, Thomas's smile grew. "Need a hand?"

"Please." Her expression was defeated as she looked to him, and he pulled the book down with ease. She could only focus on his hand resting at the small of her back as he reached above her, his fingertips seeming to burn as they grazed the thin material of her dress, though he was just being careful not to inadvertently tumble into her. He didn't notice how she shivered under the fragile touch, and he raised an eyebrow as he looked the volume over.

"Lord Byron? Really?" He looked down at her curiously, ever-present teasing in his eyes. "Didn't take you for such a romantic."

"There's a lot you don't know about me, Thomas," she replied, looking up at him with her gaze soft, before she cracked a grin. "Besides, what better way to relax is there than reading poetry about the ravages of war at midnight on a Wednesday?"

He laughed. "That's an awful specific type of self-care."

"Can't help that the over-fifty crowd you've assembled has me so riled up."

"I'd think the 19th century would be even wilder."

"So it'll help get my energy out," she quipped. Her gaze was tentative as it flickered back to the book he still held, and he raised an eyebrow.

"Then don't let me get in your way." He held the book out to her, smiling at her hesitance, and she accepted it readily, looking pleased as its title, embossed in gold foil, flashed in the moonlight.

"Always a philanthropist, huh?" Her reply was soft, absentminded, though; she wasn't looking for a response. By then, she was already caught up in the grandeur of the aging anthology of poetry. She settled into one side of the sofa as she hesitantly cracked the spine, terrified by the prospect of damaging it.

She didn't notice Thomas watching her with endearment, didn't even realize when took a seat on the couch beside her until the side of her thigh brushed against his. And when she did notice, she didn't react, though her skin jumped under the thin material of her dress. "This is gorgeous," she said, leafing gently through the book's weathered pages, running her fingertips along little stray marks and notes penciled in. After a moment, she looked up at Thomas. "Where'd you get it?"

"Think it was my great-grandfather's. It's been in the family for a while."

Her eyes widened. "How old is it?"

"This edition's from around 1900," he said, shrugging. "Bought it secondhand years later, though."

"It's more than a hundred years old?"

He chuckled at how dazzled she was, her eyes gleaming and her mouth hanging ajar. "And this is probably its first time bein' opened in fifteen years."

Her eyebrows shot up; she was appalled that anyone would have such an ornate, century-old copy of the book and leave it to collect dust on a shelf. "Why have it if you're never going to read it?"

"My family's been collectin' books for as long as we've been around, sweetheart."

"Writing isn't meant to be collected." She let out a sigh as she looked back to the collection of poetry that lay open in her lap, fiddling absentmindedly with the ribbon attached at the spine. He raised an eyebrow at her statement. "It's supposed to be experienced; it should make you feel something. It's a waste to just lock something like this away."

"Feels like that hit close to home." Though his voice was teasing, it was quiet, inquiring. She laughed, but the sound was hushed.

"I am a writer, Thomas." She looked back up at him with a demure smile to find that his gaze hadn't left her as they'd sat. "Or have you forgotten altogether that's why I'm here?"

He furrowed his brow, frowned, though his voice was playful. "So you mean you aren't here just to see me, sweetheart?"

She laughed again, unabashedly that time, as the mock disappointment faded from Thomas's face. His grin matched her own. "Please, I haven't even talked to Mark Zuckerberg yet. I thought it was fairly clear that I didn't come for the company."

"Not even for Dolley? Lafayette?" She shrugged innocently, and he teasingly bumped his shoulder against hers. "That's tough."

"I trust you won't rat me out."

He winked mischievously. "Don't count on it."

"Hey!" Her offense was far from sincere, with the joking lilt to his voice and the laugh close to the surface of hers, but she couldn't help her huff at how immediate his answer was. She pursed her lips, plastered on a pout. "If my secrets aren't safe with you, then brace yourself. You'd better get ready for an exposé about how Thomas Jefferson absolutely despises every one of his donors."

He chuckled. "Do I, now?"

"You are back here instead of out there with them."

"Mm, and you're obviously not exaggeratin' at all."

"I don't need to." She shrugged. "Since apparently these books don't even get read, you don't have much of an alibi for 'needin' some air.'" She leaned into the last three words in a painfully contrived southern accent, air quotes and all, and he grinned at her mocking impression of his voice.

"You think I sound like that?"

"Precisely." She nodded, her tone matter-of-fact, and he rolled his eyes despite the laugh he fought back.

"Anyway, some of these are bein' taken out every once in awhile, but since it's not my library, I've gotta take advantage of them while I can."

"'Not your library'?" she repeated quizzically, and he shrugged.

"I mean, it's the family library, but I don't come down here much." She couldn't help but notice how fond his voice was as he glanced around the room. He grinned when he turned to find her watching him. "I am still livin' on Capitol Hill, in case you forgot."

She pursed her lips, trying to conceal how her smile was growing. "And you'd sacrifice your night of schmoozing patrons and getting donations just to be back here?"

"I've schmoozed enough donors for one night. Besides--" Y/N shifted in her seat, slowly closing the book in her lap as she turned further toward him. "--James was always better at understandin' people."

"So we're just gonna pretend that slacking on the job isn't the reason you're back here?"

"Shh, c'mon. I'm makin' informed decisions as a professional." By then, he'd shifted the same way as she; they were facing one another on the couch, despite being shoulder-to-shoulder. He grinned in self-satisfaction. "I'm takin' on the responsibility of bein' the only person who reads these books."

"How truly self-sacrificing."

"I'm a man of the people, sweetheart." She chuckled lightly, leaning into the cushion on the back of the couch, and for a moment, they were both silent; she bit her lip at the heavy pause. His gaze flickered down to her lap, to the collection of poetry she'd shut but still continued to run her fingers over, tugging at the top of the spine, fiddling with the stacked corners of pages. He cocked his head to the side, and though he looked uncertain for a moment, his voice was decided. "Take it."

Her eyebrows shot up. "What?"

"The book." He nodded toward where it sat, all but ignoring her surprised stare. "Borrow it. Don't worry too much about returnin' it, just get it back to me whenever you're done with it."

Another beat passed as she sat stunned, certain she couldn't have heard him right. When he raised his eyebrows, waiting for her to answer, she exhaled softly, glancing down at the book. "Thomas, I couldn't possibly."

"Why not? It's a library; we're supposed to be loanin' 'em out, aren't we?"

His nonchalance about it had her entirely dumbstruck, and she bit her lip. "And what if something happens? What if it gets ruined?"

"I'm the only one who's gonna notice; I promise." He grinned. "No one's readin' it here, anyway."

She took a shaky breath, looking him in the eye. "Are you sure?"

His smile had softened at the awe in her expression. "Positive, sweetheart."

"Thank you, Thomas." She covered his hand that still lay on the couch with hers, squeezing it lightly.

"It's nothin'."

"Maybe not to you." She knocked her knee gently against his, and it was her expression that was playful this time, though her words were nothing but genuine. "But it means a lot to me. Really."

His eyes sparkled with affection as he threaded his fingers into hers. "I'm glad."

She bit her lip, holding his warm gaze. The room seemed to slow as she felt herself hesitantly shifting toward him. With her movement, when he saw how she drew deliberately closer, Thomas unthinkingly reached up with the hand that wasn't enclosed in hers to brush a stray lock of hair away from her face. The feeling of his calloused fingers as they grazed the side of her head sent a shiver down her spine, and when his hand didn't fall, ghosting his thumb across the expanse of her cheek, she leaned into the touch.

"Thomas." Her grip on his hand tightened in the slightest, her stare fell unabashedly to his lips. Though hesitantly, she pulled closer to him.

However, he hadn't moved. Reluctance lay thick in his gaze as he searched her expression. As she looked expectantly up at him, waiting for him to close the space between them, he just swallowed.

Finally, he spoke. "What are you lookin' for, from me?"

Her eyes widened. "What?"

"You're harder to read than you realize, sweetheart." She blinked. Was the implication not obvious? Wasn't she laying out in the plainest terms possible what she was looking for? Did he need really her to ask for it? He pursed his lips. "Whenever I think I've figured you out, somethin' changes."

"What do you mean?" she breathed. She pulled back to where she'd initially been sitting, almost hurt but certainly embarrassed as she withdrew, and his hand fell from her face. He didn't release her hand that still lay in his.

He sighed, shaking his head. "I mean the mixed signals. Wantin' me when we're alone and avoidin' me like the plague in public. Askin' me to kiss you in Detroit and then runnin' out on me. I can't just keep guessin'."

She stayed silent, unsure of what she could possibly say -- it wasn't often that she was left speechless, but this time, he was right. She'd always been of two minds with him. Rationally, she couldn't have him, not when they were from such different worlds, had such conflicting careers, but when she was alone with him, she couldn't help herself. However, she couldn't have expected him to so plainly call her on it.

"I wanted to talk to you about it at Lafayette's, but I've never been able to figure where you stood. And now this..." He trailed off, raking a hand through his hair, breaking her gaze. He huffed. "I just don't know what to make of you."

It was guilt that sunk in her chest at his words, but indeterminate regret weighed heavily on her conscience. "Thomas, I..." She couldn't go on with the response. There was nothing for her to say, not when her head was still in pieces, not when her career needed one thing but her libido demanded another.

He held her gaze another moment, shaking his head when it revealed absolutely nothing, when it couldn't tell him what he needed to hear. He took a deep breath as he stood up. Her hand that'd been holding his fell to the soft corduroy of the cushion. "Just... forget it. I shouldn't have brought it up." He started toward the hallway, and her eyes widened.

"Thomas, wait." After the initial shock of the point-blank confrontation began to subside, she scrambled to catch him as he began to leave, tucked the book under her arm and rushed out toward the hallway. When he heard her giving chase, he reluctantly turned to her with raised eyebrows.

"Y/N?" His tone was expectant, almost hopeful, but it was still disappointment that flickered in his eyes. She paused; she didn't know what to say, but she didn't want to let him leave like this, not when uncertainty hung so heavily in their atmosphere. He sighed. "Sugar, until you figure out what you want, I can't help you."

She didn't look away just yet, though. She wanted to have an answer, something, anything to tell him -- she was desperate to find some way to create some normalcy between them, to make things as easy as they always seemed to be. She had nothing to offer, though, other than, "I'm sorry."

He gave her a faded smile. "No need."

Y/N couldn't help her small frown at how gentle his voice still was, as though he was worried about hurting her, of all things. She glanced down at the leather-bound book she still held, and she pulled it out from beneath her arm.

"I suppose I should give this back, then." Her voice was soft as she looked up at him, and he shook his head lightly.

"Keep it." His gaze was kind as he pushed back on the book where she'd offered it up. "It's alright. Leave it with Lafayette when you're done."

He looked down at her expectantly, and she took a deep breath, hesitant. "Or I could return it next time I see you?"

Despite its tone of melancholy, his smile grew at how hopeful she sounded. She couldn't bear to let this feel so final. "Whenever works, sweetheart."

She swallowed, nodded, but her shoulders slumped. A moment passed in silence as she stared up at him, and though he looked inexplicably composed, even casual as he waited for her response, she couldn't help but feel defeated. "Alright, Thomas."

He nodded; she could hear him swallow in the complete silence as his laid-back facade faded, the noise undisturbed save for the soft crackling of the fireplace. He released his hold on the book."I'll... see you around, Y/N." He gave her one last, drained glance, before he turned, leaving her alone.

She didn't respond.

---------------

THOSE FINAL FEW minutes played on a loop in her head throughout the entirety of the next day, and the article she was writing didn't help -- every time she typed up any pieces of information about his funders, her mind regressed to his dark, quiet library, their soft banter as she learned he was sneaking off right in the middle of his own party. And with that, inevitably, came her picture-perfect memory of the heaviness of his gaze, the hurt that still lay dull in its depths. She didn't have any way to alleviate the guilt that rose from her stomach like bile.

She could only ruminate on that night for so long, though. That past Monday, when she'd asked, Mira had offered her residence in the flat above her diner. As a tenant, she'd still cover rent and utilities, but Mira had readily cut her a deal in the share of the bills she was paying -- one that made the small apartment more than affordable for her, and in exchange, her only new commitment was to closing up the diner in the evenings.

She'd spent the first half of the week moving in, and by Thursday, the space was finally livable. Angelica insisted on inviting herself and the Hamiltons over for a housewarming party that evening.

"This place is great, Y/N." Eliza smiled as Y/N emerged from her kitchen holding four glasses and a bottle of sparkling grape juice. (They'd all abstained from drinking in solidarity with Eliza.) Y/N didn't comment on how none of the furniture was different even in the slightest from when she'd lived with Angelica, that there wasn't anything new for her to have even been appreciating; she was too satisfied in having found a place at all.

"Glad you think so." She grinned as she passed around the drinks, ultimately taking a seat in the armchair beside the couch. "Moving was a bit of a pain, but I'm glad to be at my own place, now."

"Lafayette wasn't a good enough host?" Angelica interjected, a playful eyebrow raised. Y/N rolled her eyes.

"He was great, but staying with him was..." Images of Thomas walking in on her right out of the shower flashed in her mind. "Complicated."

"What do you mean, 'complicated'?" Alex asked with a wide smile, doing his best to derive some hidden meaning from her words. Y/N rolled her eyes.

"I mean I was freeloading in his expensive penthouse, Alex," she huffed, and he pursed his lips.

"It isn't freeloading if he's getting something out of it."

"And what exactly do you think he was getting out of it?" She narrowed her eyes, and he held up his hands in his own defense, shrugged innocently.

"I'm just saying!"

"Oh, don't you dare act like--"

"Enough, you two," Eliza cut them off with a tired stare. "We're here to celebrate Y/N finding her own place, not for you to bicker like children."

Though she was addressing both of them, her words were directed explicitly at Alex, her gaze burning into his. He gave a guilty simper.

"Of course not, love." He leaned over to kiss her on the cheek, and she gave him an affectionate smile despite how she was shaking her head at his antics.

"How are you feeling about living alone, then, Y/N?" Eliza changed the subject readily, more than happy to alleviate any of the tension Alex had been building in the room.

"Not that this could ever meet the standard of living with me, she means," Angelica added, and Y/N grinned, gave a timid shrug.

"Well obviously the loss of Angelica is utterly heartbreaking," she lamented with a sigh, "But I guess besides that absolutely irreplaceable loss, it's pretty good, all things considered. It's a bit of a trade-off with the late evenings I'd otherwise spend at my office, but c'est la vie."

She gave a rather stiff smile, and Angelica reached over to squeeze her knee with an empathetic frown. "I'm sorry, honey. I know it's not easy for you to put something else before your career."

"Nah, it's alright, I'm just getting a well-needed break from the excitement, not screeching to a full halt. Besides, my article from today's been getting me more than enough love." Y/N paused, her fingertips tapping on her wineglass as her gaze fell to the floor; she'd done a marvelous job pushing them down, but once again, the reminder of the article had brought the previous night's events dangerously close to the surface of her mind. She pursed her lips absentmindedly. She couldn't seem to think straight when it came to her predicament. "Actually... Can I get a bit of advice?"

Her friends all shared an inquisitive glance, before Angelica spoke. "Always. What's up?"

She let out a soft sigh, finally looking up at them. "So... it's about someone who I met through work." Alex's eyebrows shot up. "It's really silly and menial but... I just wanted someone else's take on my situation."

"Everything alright?" Eliza's voice was soft but heavy with concern. Y/N cracked a smile.

"Yeah. Yeah, of course, it's severely inconsequential." She took a deep breath as she tried to find the words for her situation that wouldn't immediately incriminate her. "There's just this person, and they're unfortunately incredibly hot, like undeniably attractive, and I'm having a really hard time not shamelessly throwing myself at them."

When she paused, Angelica furrowed her brow. To that point, her state of limbo didn't sound like much of an issue. She went on. "I also know they're into me, so it's not that I'm shooting for someone unattainable, but trying to screw them would make my life... complicated."

"Is it because you met them through your job?" Traces of suspicion leaked into Alex's tone, but Y/N was too focused on her deep-seated angst to notice. She nodded.

"Yeah. Yeah, exactly, actually." He furrowed his brow. "Like, in another context, I'd totally hit that, but given the circumstances, it's a little riskier."

"Is it one of your co-workers?" Eliza asked, glancing at Angelica, who shrugged.

"If it was, I'd hope I'd know about it." Angelica took a sip of her drink, wearing a small frown, and Y/N shook her head.

"I'm not hooking up with a coworker, don't worry. It's nothing illicit."

"So who is it?" While Alex simply sounded curious, Y/N knew him well enough to detect the suspicion buried in the question.

"I'd really rather not say."

"It'd be easier to help you if we understood the situation a little bit better."

Y/N looked to him with a sigh. "Alex."

"C'mon, why can't you tell us?" He pressed, pursing his lips. "There's no way it's that embarrassing, Y/N. What, do we know them, or something?"

When she didn't answer, just biting her lip, his eyes widened. "Do we know them?"

She scowled. "It's not important! Can you just... help me? Who it is doesn't matter."

While Alex looked more than ready to continue to interrogate her, Eliza cut him off. "So how well do you really know them? How involved are they in your life?"

Y/N looked to her with a relieved smile, grateful that someone was taking her pseudo-sob story seriously. "I haven't known him that long. We met pretty soon after I started with my current assignment at the Post." (About an hour after, specifically, but who was counting?)

"So it's a 'him'!" Alex interjected unhelpfully.

"Yes, it's a 'him,' now stay focused." Y/N gave him a tired stare.

"And how long have you been, y'know," -- Angelica shrugged -- "trying to jump his bones."

Y/N laughed lightly at that. "I am not trying to jump his bones, Ang. I'm trying to figure out whether I should jump his bones."

"Fine, whatever." Angelica waved away the technicality impatiently. "How long have you been into him for?"

Y/N pursed her lips. "I mean, there's been some level of... tension," --she cringed at her own word choice-- "since day one, but I guess it's just been the past couple weeks that it became an issue."

"The past couple weeks... ?" Alex was more thinking out loud than actually inquiring, and Y/N rolled her eyes. She could see him trying to do the calculations in his head, as though he knew everywhere she'd been at all recently.

"What d'you mean, 'became an issue'?" Angelica's eyes were shining with the question, her eyebrows raised, and Y/N laughed.

"I came into this conversation asking about whether I should sleep with someone, and you're really trying to act like I'm being all coy about it?"

"Alright, fair enough, I'll give you that," Angelica conceded, grinning. "Have you actually had a chance to sleep with him yet, though?"

She tilted her head to the side, reflecting for a moment, and the list didn't take long to build -- his office, the hotel in Detroit, Lafayette's apartment, the back room of his estate, to name a few -- and she sighed.

"Once or twice, I guess."

"And what's been holding you back?" Eliza asked gently, and Y/N gave a small smile.

"That's exactly the problem: it's my career." She shook her head lightly. "I can't justify putting how horny I am before dreams as a journalist, but I'm not sure I can have both, either."

"How exactly would the relationship hurt your career?" Angelica asked. "You're being too vague."

"First off, it’s not a relationship," Y/N corrected her, bordering on exasperated. “He’s just hot. It’s not that deep.”

"Yeah, fine. Don't avoid the question."

There was a skip. Y/N chewed her bottom lip, considering. "I mean... it wouldn't destroy my career or anything. If something went bad, though, or I ended up burning a bridge, it'd get real awkward real fast."

"How often do you see him?" Alex spoke up that time, still appearing to be fixated on dissecting every detail of the situation. His eyes were narrowed, and Y/N ignored how his question was more probing than in an effort to help.

"I dunno," she shrugged, exhaled softly. "I've seen him at the past couple of events I've covered, and I've been seeing more of him outside of work ever since Detroit."

"Ever since Detroit," he repeated, a knowing smile growing on his lips. Y/N's stomach dropped. He couldn't know who she was talking about, right? He'd have looked absolutely appalled if he suspected anything close to the truth, or so she hoped. He chuckled. "You've really been denying being into Lafayette this whole time, and now you're asking us for advice on whether you should screw him?"

Y/N's eyebrows shot up. "Hang on--"

"Oh my God, you're right," Angelica agreed, eyes wide, and Eliza cocked her head to the side, looking as though she thought the idea was more than reasonable. "The whole situation makes perfect sense."

"No, wait, I'm not--"

"First the gala, and then Detroit," Alex continued, undeterred by Y/N's pleas of innocence. "And 'seeing him more often outside of work'? You just spent a week sleeping at Laf's apartment. You'd have had more than enough opportunities to bone."

"That explains why you were so anxious to find a place!" Eliza looked fully convinced of the theory, by then, and Y/N groaned. "It would get awkward quickly if you tried to screw him and then keep living at his apartment for weeks afterward."

"You guys, I'm not fucking Lafayette."

"Not yet, anyway." Angelica grinned. "That's why you wanted advice, right?"

"And you were out with him last night!" Alex's eyes flashed victoriously. "The timing only makes perfect sense."

Y/N scowled. "Y'know what? It doesn't matter who you think it is."

"Sounds like an admission--"

"But," she cut Alex off with a pointed glare. "You have all the relevant information, and I still really need some input."

Her three friends shared a glance, all looking rather pleased. It was Eliza who finally spoke.

"Don't beat yourself up over it, Y/N." Her voice was soft, reassuring. "Any relationship, professional, platonic, or otherwise, can go wrong without sex ever being an aspect of it. You can't let the inevitable risk hold you back from the things you want."

Y/N was silent another moment; she couldn't help but feel that the advice was colored by their unfortunate theory of who was behind her sudden need for advice on her sex life.

"Besides," Angelica added, "If you're seeing him at the campaign events you cover and outside of them, the sexual tension's just gonna make it weird until you bang it out." She rolled her eyes at the crude guidance, and Angelica just shrugged at the weak glare she gave her, taking another sip of her drink.

"This sounds like suspicious logic."

"She's kinda right, Y/N," Alex agreed, nodding to Angelica. "It's awkward now, and the worst-case scenario after you two fucked would be awkwardness later on. Nothing to lose."

"I never said it was awkward now," she protested, and he raised an eyebrow.

"Is it?" He took her lack of a response as an answer in the affirmative.

She huffed at how smug he looked. "Most of this advice only applies if it's Lafayette."

"Perfect."

"Alex," she seethed, her tired glare burning into his nonchalant expression. "What about giving me some advice for the off-chance I just might not be referring to him, hm?"

Angelica shrugged. "The same doctrine follows, doesn't it? There's always a risk, and it's already awkward."

There was truth to her words. However, what Y/N hadn't and couldn't have shared was exactly how it would reflect on both her and the man in question if anyone were to find out they were sleeping together -- the Republican frontrunner screwing his most outspoken critic. She knew it'd raise eyebrows, she knew it would hurt both their careers, but was the risk real enough that it was worth placing at the crux of her decision?

Eliza was the one who eventually pulled her from her train of thought, reaching out to squeeze her arm reassuringly. "Hey. We support you no matter what decision you make, but it really seems like there isn't a downside to going for what you want here."

"Yeah?" Her voice was quiet.

"Yeah." She lifted her eyes to meet Eliza's gaze as she continued. "Now, it just comes down to you deciding whether this is something you really want."

She wasn't sure she bought into the idea of it as being as simple as that. It felt reductionist; it felt like it ignored all the variables she'd spent hours upon hours weighing in her own head.

However, if that really was the question, she knew without a doubt exactly where she stood.

-------------

Y/N WAS GETTING incredibly sick of leaning against the metal counter of the diner kitchen, counting down the seconds until she could actually close down for the night.

It was finally Friday, the end of her work week, and she was absolutely dying to finally reach the end of her shift. She was still waiting on a batch of brownies from the oven behind her, finishing up with washing the dishes to occupy her time, but no matter how she tried to distract herself, time only seemed to slow, taunting her. The keys to the diner were in her pocket; her fingers itched to turn the lock on the front door.

She checked her watch again. 9:56 PM.

The diner closed at 10.

She groaned as her watch didn't move any faster, glanced out the kitchen window to see that the last customer had already cleared out. She was growing tired, in part due to lack of sleep, but mostly, she was tired of her week of tearing her hair out in stress. Out the front window of the diner, she could see it still snowing; there was no way anyone was going to come through the blizzard less than five minutes before closing and demand service.

Her over timer pinged. She put down the mug she'd been drying and withdrew her tray, setting it on a cooling rack for the time being, and put the now-clean mug back on its shelf. She picked up another glass. The monotony was grating on her nerves, but she'd promised Mira she wouldn't close the diner until 10 PM sharp, so there she was.

She racked the glass. She reached for another. She dried it. She racked the glass. She reached for another.

Just as she began to wipe down the rim, though, the bell above the front door rang. Her grip on the cup tightened, frustration and disappointment shooting through her veins.

"Three minutes to closing," she called out from where she stood, trying (and failing) to keep the exasperated warning from her tone. With a sigh, she retied her apron and started toward the kitchen door.

"I know, I know." Whoever had decided to ruin her evening had the audacity to sound defensive. She furrowed her brow as she turned, beginning to push the door with her back as she finished cleaning the cup. The voice was eerily familiar. "'M just lookin' for a cup of coffee, and I'll be outta your hair."

With how preoccupied she was, though, she couldn't place where she knew it from until she saw him, looking as fatigued as she as he came in toward the counter, burrowed in his winter coat. She tried not to let her disbelief show across her face.

"Thomas?"

It wasn't until then that he saw her, either, emerging from the back with a skeptical gaze. He froze altogether; his eyebrows shot up. "Y/N. Hey. I, ah... I was expectin' Mira to be here." His voice was soft, and she looked at him expectantly for another moment, waiting, before he blinked hard, and continued. "...I can go, if you really... I mean I know you're just tryin' to close, and I don't wanna... I just, I--"

"It's fine." The words sounded at least as tired as she felt as she cut off his rambling. She reluctantly continued toward the front counter, and hesitantly, he did the same. She discarded the cup she'd been washing on a shelf along the back wall. "How do you take your coffee?"

Though she huffed internally, she tried to ignore it when she realized that she'd just washed the coffee pot not five minutes before. While she started brewing his drink, he took a seat in one of the stools across the counter from her.

"Doesn't matter," he shrugged, wary. His qualms were still written clearly in his gaze. "Whatever's easiest."

As he'd had no problem coming in three minutes before she intended to close the diner down, his sudden respect for her time made her roll her eyes. She glanced back over her shoulder as the coffee began to drip, giving him a flat look. "Thomas. It's just cream and sugar. I promise it isn't life-changing. Just tell me."

When she raised her eyebrows, he reluctantly said, "One cream, two sugars?" She nodded, bending over to pull a mug from the cabinet below. "Thanks, sweetheart."

Though he couldn't see it, she wore a small smile as she drew back to her full height. Fatigue was heavy in his quiet voice. "It's nothing."

The silence stretched on as neither of them seemed to know quite what to say. Thomas's gaze was set on Y/N as she walked behind the counter; the only sounds were the soft thud of the bag of sugar on the counter, the click as the refrigerator door fell shut, and the clink of ceramics. She pulled the pot of coffee from where it'd been brewing, and the plink of the drink against the bottom of the cup grew higher as she poured. When she reached for the sugar, she again looked over her shoulder, and she found him watching her.

"Am I allowed to ask what you're doing here at 10 PM on a Friday?"

"Technically, I got here at 9:57," he said matter-of-factly, and she cracked a smile, sliding open the silverware drawer to withdraw a spoon.

"Then what about what you're doing here at 9:57 on a Friday?" Her tone was mocking as she looked back at him, and despite the sleep in his gaze, he grinned.

"'M here for coffee, of course." He shrugged when she turned to him with the full mug, unamused -- the 'duh' at the end of the sentence was implied heavily in his tone.

As he gladly accepted the piping hot coffee from her, taking a delicate sip, wincing at the temperature, she raised an eyebrow and leaned across from him on the counter. "And you couldn't have gotten coffee anywhere else right now? Dunkin' Donuts? Your house?"

"Not this coffee."

"You mean the coffee I just brewed in a pot for, like, three minutes?" He nodded earnestly, and when she gave him a dramatically disbelieving stare, he shrugged, holding up his hands in defense.

"What? Mira roasts her own coffee. Can't find it anywhere else." He looked her up and down dubiously as though questioning why she could ever think his late-night pit stop wasn't justified. "And she won't sell me any without me comin' here every time I want it."

"So you'd have no issue busting in here right now if it was just Mira?"

"Somethin' like that."

Y/N furrowed her brow, leaning down onto her forearms. He looked nonchalant as he took another small sip of his drink despite the suspicion in her eyes. "When did you start coming here, anyway? Mira's annoyingly taken with you."

He grinned, his cocky lilt restored to his voice. "Can't help bein' such a charmer." When she scowled, rolled her eyes as she turned to put away the sugar and milk, he continued. "Three or four months. Stopped in here for a quick cup of coffee on my way outta work one night, and couldn't help stayin'."

"The coffee's that good?" she asked, cocking a disbelieving brow. He shrugged.

"And the atmosphere. Mira's a real sweetheart; she's always good to me."

"So, what, you and she are just best friends now?"

"Jealous?" His eyes flashed playfully. Y/N rolled her eyes.

"Of you or of her?" she teased.

A wide grin broke through his expression at that. "Either one."

She chuckled, shaking her head. "Hate to disappoint, but it's neither." She bit back a laugh at how hurt he looked; the pout he plastered on. "Anyway, is that why you're trying to crash the closing shift? Wanted to spend some quality time with Mira?"

He shrugged, unabashed. "More or less."

She nodded, the corners of her lips quirked up. "Sorry to disappoint."

"You could never."

Y/N had to laugh at how contrived his conviction was, at what bordered on offense in his voice even at the idea of it, and the sound made him smile. "Thanks, Thomas."

She rolled her eyes as she turned to the shelves, finishing with the cup she'd been wiping down before he'd showed up, and she unplugged the coffee pot. As she began to wipe down the back counter, he spoke. "Should I get goin' then?" When she raised a questioning eyebrow at his sudden change of tune, glanced back at him, he added, "I mean, since I missed Mira 'n' all, and I don't wanna hold you up here later than I already have, I just thought--"

"That's alright. We're out of to-go cups for the rest of your coffee, anyway." When he didn't respond, she finally turned around, wiping her hands on the rag she'd been using to clean. She wore a teasing grin. "Or are you just that anxious to get away from me, hm?"

"'Course not." His smile broadened to match hers as she rested her hands on the counter before him. "Just figured you were countin' down the seconds till you could get rid of me."

"Don't worry, I don't have the patience to count by seconds." Y/N shrugged. "I've been counting by minutes, instead."

"Aw, sweetheart, I'm hurt." He put an offended hand to his heart, drawing back from her where he sat. "Thought we were friends."

She huffed out an involuntary laugh. "Shut up and drink your coffee."

She went back to her tasks with that, shaking her head lightly, tongue in cheek to stifle her amusement. She heard him take another sip of his drink, but when the cup met the saucer, he asked, "What smells so good?"

Her eyebrows shot up as she glanced back into the kitchen. "Oh, right, almost forgot about those." She looked over her shoulder at him. "I've been making brownies, still need to cut them." While he nodded indifferently, there was a wistful look in his eyes as he sat up straighter on his stool to see into the kitchen. She folded her arms. "You want one?"

His eyebrows shot up, and his gaze snapped to where she stood. "Really?"

She shrugged, mildly amused. "Sure. Since I can't seem to get rid of you, anyway."

"That's tough!" he called after her, offended, as she exited into the kitchen, laughing lightly.

She emerged not minutes later, holding two of the brownies; they were still just slightly warm from the oven, so cutting them was no ordeal. She pursed her lips. Thomas's mouth was all but watering as she walked back toward the counter, handing him the napkin one of them was housed atop.

"Enjoy," she commented mildly, suppressed her amusement at the longing in his eyes for the dessert.

"Thanks, sweetheart." His voice was soft. She pushed herself up to sit on the back counter as she ate hers, and when she looked back up, she saw him bite into the dessert, a soft moan escaping his lips. She laughed.

"Is it that good?"

"'S incredible," he mumbled, covering his mouth as he tried to speak, before he swallowed. "Shit, Y/N."

"You're just flattering me because I'm not booting you out of here, but I'll take it anyway."

While she looked rather pleased, he frowned. "You accusin' me of bein' ingenuine?"

"Where did you ever get that idea?" she asked sarcastically, shaking her head. He scowled.

"Hurtful."

"I'm sure."

He put the brownie back on the counter, took another sip of his coffee. "How'd you end up workin' here, anyway?"

She shrugged. "I've told you about my most recent financial crisis. I needed a second source of income."

"Why here, though?" He cocked his head to the side, and she raised an eyebrow, not quite following the aim behind the question. "I just mean, I haven't seen you around here until the past week or so. Was it just 'cause they were hirin'?"

She gave a small smile. "Not quite. Mira and Orlando are my godparents."

His eyebrows shot up. "Yeah?" When she nodded, a small grin formed on his lips. "That why you're so jealous of me and Mira bondin'?"

She rolled her eyes. "Like you could ever replace me?"

He shrugged noncommittally, making Y/N scowl. "I dunno, sweetheart. She and I are gettin' pretty close."

"Get your own mother figure, Jefferson."

"Aw, c'mon now, don't be greedy." He grinned at how progressively annoyed she was beginning to look. "What? Why should you get two mother figures and I don't?" She wasn't quite following his line of reasoning as she cocked an eyebrow, and he shrugged. "Don't have a godmother, feels like fair game to me."

When she didn't answer, he creased his forehead. His voice was hesitant. "Y/N?"

Another beat passed, before she raked a hand through her hair, offering him a smile. "I guess so."

With how weary she suddenly sounded, though, he didn't leave it at that. "What is it you're not tellin' me here?"

She cracked a grin as she met his eyes, amused by how he was looking at her. "Don't look so worried. Geez, Thomas. Mira and Orlando raised me, alright? That's all." She pushed herself off the back counter to discard her napkin.

However, as Y/N walked back toward where he sat at the counter, Thomas bit his lip. Her forced nonchalance didn't seem to quell his concern. "'M I allowed to ask why?"

She shrugged, but her voice grew quiet as she leaned onto the counter. "My parents passed on when I was pretty young." She chose not to meet his eyes, swallowing as she fiddled anxiously with her watch. "Mira and Orlando took me in, so they're all I've had for a family most of my life."

"What happened?" he asked softly. One of his large hands enveloped hers on the counter, and his touch was tentative, nervous, waiting for her to brush him off. When she didn't, he squeezed her hand lightly, and she looked up at him with a sad smile.

"Cancer." He looked crestfallen; she just pursed her lips. "Dad got sick when I was around ten. He was in and out of the hospital for a few years, and my mom spent most of her time with him, getting him treatment, taking care of him, waiting at his bedside. When she wasn't with him, she was working overtime to pay his medical bills. I was alone at home almost every night, so I started going to sleep at Mira and Orlando's when I was twelve."

Y/N's chest was tight. When Thomas didn't interrupt her, just watching her, waiting patiently, she bit her lip, apprehensive to continue. When he didn't fill the growing silence, she went on. "We thought Dad made a full recovery when I was thirteen, but by my fourteenth birthday, Mom was diagnosed. And it just felt like the same thing all over again."

She swallowed hard; tears stung the corners of her eyes, but she forced a smile, blinking hard, and huffed out a laugh despite herself. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to launch into a monologue on my childhood trauma. You don't need to listen to the full story just to be polite."

"'S alright." He offered her a soft smile, and when he brushed his thumb over her knuckle, she found herself squeezing his hand in return, a silent 'thank you.' "Go on. 'M listenin'."

She hesitated another moment when she saw the worry that clouded his gaze. “You sure?” He nodded with full conviction, and though her reluctance didn’t clear, she went on. "...Right. Then, well, after that, Mom was in chemo, and about five months later, Dad had a flare-up. Hospitalized him immediately. That's when I started living with the Murillos full time."

"Mira and Orlando?" he questioned, and she nodded.

"They got me through high school. I visited my parents when I could, but life went on, and as far as I knew, they were recovering." She shrugged, but her tone grew spiteful. She rarely talked about her parents, didn't want to think of how unfair fate had been to her growing up. "My junior year, they passed on within eight months of each other."

She pressed her lips together, and Thomas didn't release her hand. "I'm so sorry," he breathed, and she gave a soft smile, finally looking back up at him.

"It's alright, really." She shrugged, but she didn't move, didn't break his gaze. "It's been more than ten years. I miss them, but I'm okay."

"You sure?"

"I've had a decade to mourn them, and even though grief doesn't ever really leave, it subsides. I'm just fine."

He nodded as she gave him a mournful smile, and alongside the empathy in his gaze, she couldn't help but notice his own sadness shining through. "I know what you mean," he said softly, and Y/N tilted her head to the side.

"Yeah?" As far as she knew, Thomas wasn't an orphan, and she'd done extensive research into his background.

He gave her a sympathetic smile. "Just... about grief never quite leavin'." She waited for him to elaborate, and it wasn't until she raised an eyebrow that he did. "I mean, it's normal. You still think about them every day? Wonder what they'd think about you if they were here now? Feel like you still owe them something, like you have to live your life as though they're around?"

She frowned. "Yeah, exactly." He nodded, and she furrowed her brow. Hesitantly, she asked in a quiet voice, "Thomas, who have you lost?"

He shrugged as he released her hand, instead taking a sip of his coffee. He seemed like he almost thought better of giving her an answer for a moment, but then he spoke. "My fiancée died when I was twenty-three."

"That's terrible." Y/N's brow had immediately knit; she rested on her hands at the edge of the counter. When Thomas saw how she was looking at him, the sadness in her eyes, he chuckled despite himself.

"Wasn't the best time of my life, if I'm honest."

"I'd imagine." His smile was warm at the dry quip as he looked down into his coffee absentmindedly. He didn't look up, never saw the concern in her eyes. "Can you tell me what happened?"

"Was a freak accident. Came outta the blue a year after we moved in together." He let out a bitter exhale, somewhere between a huff and a mirthless laugh. "She was hit by a drunk driver, and it took her life on impact. I couldn't handle it."

It was her turn to take his hand, then. He'd begun to withdraw. Vulnerability showed through his gaze, through his clenched jaw, through his antsy, almost undetectable movements. He looked up at her, when she did, and she weaved her fingers through his.

"Of course you couldn't, Thomas." She put her other hand atop where she held his. "No one would be able to. Mourning doesn't make you weak, it makes you human. It also means you were strong enough to carry on."

"I wish I had." He looked dejected, by then, almost apathetic as he reflected. When she looked at him questioningly, she could hear him swallow thickly. "I didn't carry on. I ran. Moved away before her funeral 'cause I couldn't stand to see her casket. I didn't grieve for almost three years, just came to DC and started pourin' myself into my work."

"And what's wrong with that, hm?" His eyes had dropped again, and she leaned down into his line of vision, broke his absent stare. "Hey. What's so wrong with that?"

He let out a shaky sigh. "Never honored her memory. Didn't go to her grave or talk to her family until years after she was gone."

"You were trying to cope. That's all you can do. Everyone deals with loss differently."

"But she didn't deserve that," he pressed. She creased her forehead; concern rested in her eyes.

"But what about what you deserved, Thomas?" He cocked his head to one side; his gaze was brimming with inquisition. "Don't you deserve to take care of your own needs? Do you really think she would've wanted you falling apart?"

"Sweetheart, 'm not the one who was killed."

"You don't deserve to suffer just because you're the one who lived."

"But I shoulda been there, at her funeral, at her grave." He drew in a shaky breath. "Feels like I abandoned her."

You did what you needed to do," Y/N insisted. "Wherever she is now, whatever afterlife you believe in, or don't believe in, she obviously hasn't been forgotten."

He nodded, sniffed as he pulled back. He rubbed the corner of his eye, taking a breath, and she didn't comment on it. He ran a hand through his hair as he forced his composure, restored his easygoing manner. His grin was back as though it'd never been gone. "Thank you."

"Anytime."

They shared a smile for a moment, and he pursed his lips. "Can I... ask you not to do anythin' with this?"

Her eyebrows shot up. "What d'you mean?"

"We were never married, so almost no one knows about her, other than close friends and family." He sighed. "'S not information you can find online. And I just..." He trailed off as he looked up at her, tone tentative. "I know you're a journalist 'n' all, but please, can I ask you not to take this to the press?"

While anxiety was clear in his gaze, her eyes were wide, surprised that he thought he even needed to ask. "Of course, Thomas. I would never. It's safe with me."

"Thank you." A beat passed as she just stared into his eyes; with how he was day-to-day, with what she knew of him before, she could've never guessed how much pain he carried with him. He exhaled softly, gave her a grateful smile.

His trance seemed to break a few seconds later when she reached out to lightly squeeze his hand. He shifted in his seat, glanced at the clock above the kitchen door. "Shit, sweetheart, it's almost 10:40. You've gotta be dyin' to kick me outta here."

An apologetic grin accompanied his words, but as he searched her expression for some kind of response, Y/N recognized his question for what it was -- if he'd really wanted to go, he'd have already been pulling himself up, but did she want him to stay?

She shrugged, wearing a kind smile. "I mean, until our final customer is gone, I can't technically close up." He raised an eyebrow. "So really, I'm in no position to be kicking you out."

He shook his head, amusement slowly being restored to his features. "Really, now? An hour ago, you couldn't wait to get rid of me."

"Maybe I was just a worse employee an hour ago."

He laughed. "Aw, someone's gettin' attached, huh?"

She deadpanned as she met his shining eyes. His tone was nothing but teasing. "I take it all back. Get out. Go on."

"Aw, c'mon, sugar, I'm just kiddin'," he pleaded, though he showed no traces of regret. Y/N fixed him with a tired stare.

"You know where to find the door."

"Now, really?" he pouted, brow knit, and she rolled her eyes. "What'd I do to deserve this, hm?"

She scowled, though the amusement she tried to hold back lay clearly in her soft gaze. "Do you really want an answer to that?"

He seemed to think better of it at her words, and quickly changed tacts. "What about the rest of my coffee?"

"Dumping it out. No problem." She shrugged, and he huffed, giving her a fully manufactured look of disappointment.

"Thought we were connectin', and now this is how you treat me?" She held her skeptical stare, and a grin broke through his facade. "Now, what's Mira gonna think when I tell her you kicked out her favorite customer?"

Y/N regarded him wearily, in no mood for his schtick. His eyes were gleaming; he looked up at her with warmth coloring his gaze, and ultimately, when she found no malice in his stare, no ill intent, nothing but goodwill, she huffed.

"Fine. Whatever. Finish the coffee. In the meantime, since apparently, you're shamelessly becoming a parasite, I'm gonna get myself something to eat. You gonna want anything so I can save myself the extra trip?"

He quirked an eyebrow. "Wouldn't mind another brownie."

"And now what's Mira gonna think when she realizes all of our bakery is gone tomorrow?" She folded her arms, turning his own words back on him, but he was unfazed.

"That you gave it to her favorite customer, of course."

--------------

AND AS THE night slowly stretched on, the pair went on like that for more than another hour, recounting their pasts to one another, each passing judgment on the terrible haircuts the other had in the 90s, reminiscing on college. Y/N was surprised to hear Thomas played the violin (she couldn't tell whether he was joking when he offered to play for her sometime); Thomas couldn't help but poke fun at her when he learned she wrote sappy poetry in high school (and in turn, she threatened again to kick him out). They always seemed to find an excuse for him to hang around just a little longer.

Eventually, midnight struck; both Y/N's and Thomas's attention was drawn to the little clock above the door that finally chimed.

They met each other's eyes for a moment, and while Y/N just waited expectantly, letting him make the call on his next move, Thomas sighed.

"I really should head out, sweetheart."

Y/N smiled softly; her teasing expression couldn't seem to mask the affection dancing in her eyes. "Finally. Can't close until you're outta here, remember? It's kinda rude that you didn't leave earlier, really."

He scoffed, despite that there was no real scorn in her gaze, and raised a brow. "Mm, and it was really rude of me to accept the coffee, and brownies, and leftovers you kept offerin' me every time I tried to leave."

"You didn't put up much of a fight, to be fair." She pursed her lips, giving him a pointed look, and he chuckled.

"Won't deny it."

She'd long since finished wiping everything down, including the dishes she'd been giving Thomas, and though she was far from pushing him out the door, she wasn't going to resist some much-needed sleep.

Thomas finally stood up from his stool, fished his wallet out of his coat pocket. "How much do I owe you?" He glanced back up from where he was leafing through bills, and Y/N shrugged, wearing a small smile.

"This one's on the house."

His eyebrows shot up. "You sure?"

"Mhm." She nodded, cracked a lopsided grin as she still leaned against the counter. "Consider it payback for the century-old book I've got stashed upstairs."

"Upstairs?" he repeated quizzically, and she nodded.

"Yeah, didn't I mention? This was the housing plan I figured out," she told him. "Mira cut me a deal in exchange for taking the late shift every night."

"Every night, huh?" he asked, mischief creeping into his expression. She raised a suspicious brow. "So you're tellin' me, if I was gonna show up at 9:58 next Friday--"

"Don't you dare!" she warned him, but when he laughed, his smile was contagious. "I'm gonna have to start closing up at 9:56 here on out."

"I can adjust." He sent her a wink before tucking his wallet back into his pocket, glancing out at the snowstorm beyond the store windows. Y/N was shivering just looking at it. He pursed his lips. "You sure you've got no to-go cups left?"

"No more coffee, Thomas," she said sternly, giving him a pointed look.

"Alright, alright! Geez," he laughed. "Guess I'll just have to show up tomorrow three minutes before openin' huh?"

She shrugged. "Be my guest; I don't work Saturday mornings."

"Noted. Shouldn’t be too hard to figure out your schedule."

"That anxious to see me again?" She cocked her head to the side, smug, and he winked.

"Always." He exhaled softly before finally turning toward the exit. "I'll see you around?"

"You know where to find me." He nodded, chuckled as he tucked his hands in his pockets, burrowing into his coat as he neared the door. "G'night, Thomas."

He cast her one final glance over his shoulder, eyes shining. "Night, sweetheart."

She shuddered at the gust of cold air that entered the diner upon his exit, finally going to lock up the front, drawing the shades before she went up to her flat. The brownies she'd made were put away, the chairs were all up; she did one final, brief sweep of the place, and hit the light.

She couldn't deny her fatigue as she reached her apartment, locking the front door behind her, but after discarding her apron into her hamper, she made the executive decision that she needed to shower before she could go to sleep. She'd been going all day long and had begun to smell like a mix of old ham, coffee, and melted chocolate -- three good things in isolation, but not quite something she’d be purchasing as a Dior fragrance anytime soon.

She emerged from the shower less than half an hour later, and though it'd woken her up just a bit, it was nice to feel clean, putting on clean pajamas, being in her clean apartment.

She was just on the inoperational side of sleepy as she walked back to her room, yawning into one of her sweater paws, checking her phone once more for the night, going through the notifications from the past few hours.

She was already burrowed halfway under her blankets when she saw the message that made her freeze. It was on her Twitter account.

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: are you still up

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: im so sorry about this

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: but my car won't start

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: im still out in your parking lot

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: think the weather broke something in the engine

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: im so sorry to ask this

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: but if you're awake, would u be willing to let me back in ?

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: just real quick i swear

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: please it's less than freezing out here

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: im so sorry about this y/n

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: really i dont mean to take advantage of your hospitality

@Thomas_Jefferson is typing...

Her eyes widened; her eyebrows shot up. She was already in bed, she was dying to finally just get some sleep, but she couldn't just leave him out in the cold knowing she was the only one around to help him out. She sighed.

@Y/N_L/N sent: jesus christ, thomas stop rambling

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: im so sorry

@Y/N_L/N sent: relax, ill come down to let you in now

She huffed as she pulled herself out of bed, bringing one blanket with her to the stairs, mildly bleary-eyed.

Once again, her phone pinged.

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: thank you

@Thomas_Jefferson sent: ill come to your door

Sure enough, when she made it down, shifted the blinds to peer through, ensure that it was actually Thomas and that she wasn't about to get abducted in her booty shorts and men's XL college sweatshirt, she saw him standing there, shivering, and her eyes widened. She rushed to unlock the front door, and Thomas didn't waste a second coming in.

"Jesus, sweetheart, I can't thank you enough." He let out a deep breath, seemingly reveling in the warmth of the room. She closed the door quickly behind him, though the wind certainly put up a fight. "'M so sorry about this. Really, if I could fix it now, I would, but I think somethin' in the motor froze while I was parked out there for a couple hours. I--"

"It's ok, Thomas," Y/N said softly, doing her best not to sound as though she was half asleep, and she pulled her blanket tighter around herself. "Really. I'd rather you not freeze to death; it'd put a bit of a damper on my career."

He grinned. "So self-centered."

She scowled. "Go back outside."

He laughed as he unbuttoned his coat, tucked his gloves in his pocket and withdrew his phone. "Did I wake you up?" He eyed her choice of attire dubiously, looking amused, and she shifted her blanket to cover her shorts.

"Nah, I was just on my phone in bed. You're fine."

"...Right." She ignored his disbelieving tone.

"How long were you out there for before you messaged me?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. He sighed.

"'Bout half an hour. 'M sorry, I couldn't take the cold any longer."

"Don't apologize, geez," she huffed. "You think I'd have rathered you stayed in your icebox of a car and said nothing?"

"I'm gonna guess by your tone that it's a no, but I gotta say, I wasn't so sure."

"Oh, shut up!" Y/N scowled, and he grinned. "Can I call someone for you? A tow truck? A mechanic?" She asked, rubbing the side of her nose, eyebrows raised, and Thomas shook his head.

"Nah, don't worry 'bout it." He seemed engrossed in whatever he was typing into his phone, staring down at it intently and hardly sparing her a glance as he furrowed his brow. "I'm gonna call myself an Uber. I'll be outta your hair in five minutes, and I'll come by to get my car in the morning. That ok?"

She nodded, hardly even processing his words. "Yeah. Yeah, fine."

She stifled another yawn as he grew increasingly frustrated with his app. Several moments passed; she saw him repeatedly pressing the same button with no increasing degree of success. It took him longer than it should've to admit defeat, letting out a sigh.

"Everything ok?"

He shook his head. "Uber isn't runnin' in this storm. Can I take you up on that tow truck?"

"Yeah, d'you want the number?"

"Please." His expression plainly revealed his increasing desperation as she pulled up the contact in her phone, rattled off the digits to him.

She spaced out gradually after taking a seat on one of the stools by the counter, absentmindedly watching him make the call. His relief was written clearly in his eyes when someone answered, and she listened to him go back and forth with the person on the other end of the line at such an ungodly hour. Whoever it was didn't seem to have any more patience than Thomas. It wasn't until he was cut off mid-sentence that his face finally fell.

"Yeah, yeah, I understand," he said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You have a good night, now."

"Bad news?" Y/N raised an eyebrow when he finally hung up the call. He looked to her with pursed lips.

"The roads are closed through downtown 'cause of a severe weather warnin'." Her eyebrows shot up, and he let out a defeated sigh. "I'm so sorry; 'm sure I have someone in the area who I can call and just walk over to. Gimme a few more minutes."

While he searched frantically through his phone, brow knit in worry, she could see the panic beginning to show through. She pursed her lips. His solution seemed flawed at best and downright suicidal at worst; the weather was brutal. "Thomas," she began, swallowing her qualms, but she didn't get a chance to go on, not in the midst of his rising anxiety

"You know of any hotels close to here, sweetheart? Even just--"

"There aren't any, Thomas," she sighed, running a hand through her hair. She knew she had to offer him residence for the night, by then, but exhaustion colored her reluctance.

"How far d'you suppose the nearest is?" He raised an eyebrow, glancing up. "'Cause I can walk to some--"

"Thomas." She looked at him tiredly. "I live upstairs."

He blinked, hesitant to draw the only clear conclusion from what she was saying, too afraid of the idea that he could've been being presumptuous. "...Okay?"

Her gaze was flat. "Just come crash at my apartment for the night. I have the space; I can't let you try to walk seven miles in the storm to some dingy B&B."

He bit his lip; he appeared anxious to accept her offer. "Listen, I don't wanna impose, sweetheart; I can--"

"You aren't imposing. Calm down." He raised an eyebrow; tentativeness still lay in his gaze, but he seemed to be realizing the futility of his situation. "I'm offering, alright?"

He paused. "You don't have to take me in just cause--"

"Thomas." She huffed, cutting him off for what she hoped was the final time. "Stop worrying about it. Seriously. If it'd really make you that uncomfortable, I guess I could bring a pillow down here for you to sleep on the floor, if that was what you really wanted, but otherwise, just come upstairs."

He raised his eyebrows, and his voice was quiet when he spoke. "You sure?"

She chuckled. "I'm sure. Now, stop making such a big deal of it. C'mon."

She nodded toward the staircase before going back to lock the front door to the diner, and she hit the lights again as he followed her up. "Thank you so much, Y/N, really, I--"

"What'd I just say about making a big deal out of it, hm?" She glanced back at him as they reached the top of the spiral staircase up to her apartment, and she unlocked the door. He gave a soft smile.

"Still, sweetheart. Thank you."

"It's not a problem," she chuckled. He came alongside her through the entrance, and she shut her front door behind him as he glanced around the flat curiously.

"What should I do with my coat?"

"Just put it on one of the hooks by the mirror. Leave your shoes wherever; it doesn't really matter." She flipped the kitchen light on as she walked in. "So, the couch is a pull-out; if you're still up when I go to sleep, the bedding and mattress pad are in the closet at the back of the hall. The bathroom is also back there, first door on your left, and you're welcome to help yourself to anything from the kitchen."

He raised an eyebrow as he shrugged off his coat, kicked off his shoes. "You got any more of those brownies up here?" he asked innocently.

Y/N paused where she stood, sending him a warning look. "That better be a joke."

"Of course, sugar." He'd begun wandering through her sitting room while she poured herself a drink. "Seriously, though, were you goin' to sleep when I messaged you? Don't wanna keep you up any later than I already have."

She shrugged. Despite her exhaustion, despite how she knew it'd have been impossible for him not to catch onto her fatigue, going to sleep didn't seem like the best of her options -- first off, she felt guilty to try and leave him alone there when he was all hopped up on caffeine, but second, and far more importantly, she didn't want to leave all her personal possessions out for him to poke through. (He'd probably go poking around, too, and she wouldn't blame him in the slightest; it wasn't like she hadn't dug through his belongings before.)

She finally answered, "Nah, not just yet. Was gonna pour myself a glass of wine, though; you want any while I'm at it?"

He hummed, considering it as she reached up for the bottle where she'd stashed it. "Wouldn't mind one."

So with that, she withdrew two glasses, pouring her cheap Cabernet Sauvignon out for the pair of them. With a sigh, she discarded her blanket on the side of the rug next to the couch, unable to carry both glasses along with it.

When she rejoined him, he stood before her bookshelf, arms crossed, leaning forward ever-so-slightly to get a better look at the titles.

"See anything you like?"

Her voice made him turn, matching her smile as he accepted the glass of wine. "I just might." His playful wink as he looked her over made her laugh. "Thanks for this, by the way."

She shrugged as he nodded to the drink she'd poured, lifting her own glass to her lips. "It's no Sassicaia, but it does the trick."

He took a sip, the corners of his lips quirking up. "Could be worse."

Though her gaze drifted to the bookshelf before him, she laughed lightly. "What high praise," she commented dryly.

"Isn't it?" Thomas grinned, glancing down at her, and she rolled her eyes. Her reaction didn't seem to deter him, though. "'M kiddin'," he reassured her, as though she'd taken any sort of offense at the statement. "Really, hope you know how grateful I am for all this."

His tone was light as he gestured to the room around them. While he seemed unfazed, Y/N couldn't help but feel absurd, as though the whole situation still could've been some strange, lucid dream.

"Ah, yes, I'm such a guardian angel," she agreed, tone dry with sarcasm. "I've provided an old mattress and an eight-dollar bottle of wine. You really struck it lucky."

He gave a cheeky grin. "The company more than makes up for it."

She scoffed, shaking her head, but she didn't suppress her growing smile. "You really owe me big, then."

"I'll find a way to pay you back."

She took another sip of her wine, and for once, the warmth blossoming in her chest wasn't just fast-acting heartburn from having cheaped out on dollar-store alcohol. She watched him another moment, waited to speak until he finally met her gaze. "Anything on my bookshelf holding your interest?"

His shrug revealed next to nothing. "No surprises here."

"Oh, because you know my taste in literature so well?" Her skepticism made him smile. Really, any resistance she provided didn't come from him being incorrect, but instead from how uneasy his discerning gaze made her; he spoke as though he could see right through her, as though he'd long since figured out what makes he tick. She couldn't help but feel exposed.

"You're easier to read than you think, sweetheart." She didn't answer, but instead raised her eyebrows, waiting for him to go on. "Keats, Austen, Plath..." He quirked a brow. "... seven different copies of The Princess Bride."

"Hey, it's a classic!" she defended, and he laughed.

"'Course it is." He took a sip of his drink, eyes shining. "It's interestin', though."

"Yeah?"

He nodded. "Rest of this apartment is almost completely bare, but this bookshelf is almost overflowin'."

She cocked her head. "Care to enlighten me on what makes that so interesting?"

"'S just predictable." He shrugged, his gaze turning to Y/N with a small smile. "Says somethin' about your priorities, huh? Nothin' you need straightened out."

His wink made her grin. "And who gave you the right to come into my home and judge my lifestyle?"

"Hey, I'm just validatin' you," he defended. "Besides, last I checked, you gave me that right by invitin' me up here."

Y/N huffed at how pleased he looked with himself, going to take a seat on her couch behind him. He raised an eyebrow as she did, and when his gaze followed her, he found himself turning, leaning against the bookshelf as she addressed him. "Don't make me regret it when you've hardly been up here for ten minutes."

"Aw, but I'm touched by how much you care, savin' me from the storm."

Y/N rolled her eyes. "I didn't want you to freeze to death, try not to let it go to your head."

"But sweetheart, you saved my life; how could I not be forever in your debt?" At that point, he was playing up his gratitude, having plastered on a full pout, wearing a wistful expression, and Y/N hoped in vain that her amusement didn't show on her face.

"Don't be so dramatic; I just saved my career." She hid her smile behind the rim of her glass.

"C'mon, do I really mean that little to you?"

"You really want me to answer that?"

He laughed, coming back around to join her on the couch. "I'm gonna let that one go, just cause I know you don't mean it."

"...Right." The couch cushions dipped beside her as he sat, and she shifted, turned to him, pulling a leg up beside her onto her seat. He raised a dubious eyebrow before taking another sip of wine.

"You really expect me to believe that?" While his voice was light, the question itself wasn't in jest. The fact that she chose to ignore her adamant attraction to him didn't make it any less obvious, apparently -- it was forever bubbling just below the surface, hanging tense in the air between them. She sighed.

"Alright, I guess you caught me. It's true, my motives aren't purely selfish. I confess." She looked him in the eye with faux solemnity. "I'm also trying to save James and Dolley from having to plan a funeral."

He only shook his head, amused. She was deflecting again, and not subtly, either. Thomas was trying to tread lightly, but she wasn't making it easy on him. "Ever the humanitarian."

"I do try." His gaze was growing empty as she held his eyes. He looked as though his mind was elsewhere. When she drank more of her wine, eyeing him, he hadn't moved a muscle, his expression was blank. "Thomas?"

He blinked hard when she waved her hand in front of him, forcing a wide smile. "Sorry, sweetheart, just spaced out a minute."

"What are you thinking about?" The question was innocent, but it made him tense. He shrugged, pausing a moment.

"Just wonderin' where you got that century-old book of Bryon poems hidden." Though she raised an eyebrow, she tried not to let her skepticism pervade her expression. He raised an eyebrow. "You clearly don't have it packed into that same old bookshelf. Lose it already?"

"Not quite yet." She elected to ignore how he was deflecting in turn. "It's at my beside. I was doing some light reading last night."

"Enjoyin' it?"

"So much." Her excitement was genuine, then, when he raised a brow; her eyes were shining. "D'you know it's been annotated by like, seven different people? It's so interesting, seeing different interpretations from the past hundred years."

His lips quirked. "And what'd you think of my notes?"

"Some of those were yours?"

He nodded. "Everything in purple."

"You have pretty handwriting." When he grinned outright, her gaze drifted to his mouth a moment. She caught herself before he could react. "Anyway, I thought you said no one had read that in almost fifteen years."

"'S cause no one had. Those annotations were all the way back in college."

She raised her eyebrows. "Now, I definitely didn't expect you to be a fan of Byron."

"Oh yeah?" He crossed one of his legs over the other, shifting to face her, and draped an arm over the back of the couch. He looked curiously at her. "Why's that?"

"Definitely didn't take you for a romantic."

"Hey, now." His offense was entirely a facade, and his smile despite it didn't help his case. "I'm hurt. I've always been a romantic."

She snorted out a disbelieving laugh. "I'm sure you have."

"I'm not kiddin'!" he defended, but her clear skepticism amused him regardless. "'M a sentimental person."

"Could've fooled me."

"And why's that?"

"I dunno." She shrugged, taking another sip of her drink as she glanced at him. While his tone was lighthearted, his gaze was inquisitive, searching -- he didn't respond, letting the silence stretch on, and she felt as though she owed him an answer. "You're just so... laid-back and carefree. You're all confident, and brash, and have a flair for the dramatics. I guess I wouldn't have pegged you as a softie."

"I like to think I'm pretty empathetic." His voice was soft. "I've devoted my life to public service, to makin' people's better. You've gotta be compassionate to put the time and money into runnin' for president, right?"

"Or you have to be power-hungry," she contended, and though her tone was light, he creased his forehead.

"'S that really what you think of me?"

With how he was looking at her, bordering on hurt, Y/N could feel guilt building at the back of her throat. She'd come into her current job with so many preconceptions about him that she couldn't have known whether were true, but she hadn't hesitated in entertaining the ideas regardless. "Not anymore." She was sure she looked as embarrassed as she felt. "But I may have made some unfair assumptions, once upon a time."

He gave her a mild grin. "Don't sweat it; it goes both ways."

"Excuse me?" She sat up straighter, raising an eyebrow, and he only seemed amused as he regarded her.

"Oh, you're actin' all offended, now?"

"I am offended."

"You shouldn't be." She squinted suspiciously at him as he continued. "Never thought you were a bad person, or anythin', just didn't expect all this from you." With his words, he gestured to the room around him, and she was slow to reply.

"What d'you mean?"

"Lettin' me stay so late in your diner, takin' me in with the storm out there..." He trailed off, shrugging. "You're bein' more generous than you're givin' yourself credit for."

"To be fair, you would've been able to get home without a problem if I'd just kicked you out earlier."

"But you didn't." How perceptive he'd suddenly become had her shifting in her seat. "Feel like I owe you for it."

She smiled bashfully, sipping her wine. With how he was looking at her, heat had begun to rise in her cheeks. "Really, Thomas, it's not a big deal. It's the least I can do."

"It means a lot, though. Really. Didn't have to do any of this for me." His gaze roamed her apartment thoughtlessly, and he wore a small smile. Her eyes were fixed firmly on him all the while, drinking in his expression, the smallest details of his face, from the little patch below his ear he'd missed while shaving, to the stray curl that always seemed to fall across his forehead. "Thank you, Y/N."

What happened next caught them both off guard, despite how slow, gradual, even how nervous it was.

Her action was unexpected, but not sudden, and for once, Y/N didn't think about it. She just acted. He'd turned back to her in surprise when her fingertips grazed his stubble, no longer caught up in eyeing the room around them, and before he said anything, she was leaning in, kissing him.

The action wasn't rushed, and at first, it was chaste -- he was breathless, kissing her back without thinking twice, and his hand rose to cup her cheek, following her movements.

It took him a minute to pull away, and when he did, Y/N backed off immediately, wide-eyed. "Sweetheart--"

Her stomach dropped. Rejection hadn't been an outcome she'd considered, not after how he'd been coming onto her time and time again, not after the other night, with how frankly he'd asked her what she was looking for from him. "Shit, Thomas, 'm sorry." Her apology was breathless. "I... I didn't mean to make you--"

But he didn't let her go on, his hand moving from her cheek to the nape of her neck, stopping her from retreating to the opposite side of the couch as she lay her glass of wine on the coffee table. "Is this what you want?"

His question made her freeze. He wasn't shooting her down; his eyes searched hers, and she swallowed roughly. "Yes," she breathed. Another beat passed. She bit her lip, waiting for him to react, waiting to see what he'd say or do, but he didn't move.

"Are you sure?" he asked, his voice quiet but firm. "'Cause if you're gonna run out, rebuke me again, I can't--"

"I'm sure." She didn't waste another moment in pulling him back down to her, pushing herself across the couch, closer to him, and as her lips again met his, he discarded his glass, instead tugging her onto him by the waist.

She pulled him close that time, abandoning her hesitance. He didn't want to stop her, either -- not when her arms snaked up around his neck, not when she swung one of her legs over his, straddling his lap, not when she knit a hand into the curls at the base of his neck, and his self-control was fleeting as he bit down on her bottom lip, making her moan. But despite how she was kissing him, despite the sheer desire in her actions, his concern hadn't subsided.

When he held her face just inches from his own, thumb tracing patterns into the top of her hip, her stare was saturated with surprise. "Y/N, really," he started, worried. She raised her eyebrows. "I've gotta know--"

"I've thought this through," she cut him off firmly, rolling her hips teasingly down against his, and the action made him groan. "I want this. I want you. I'm not going to regret this; I'm not going to run off. If you want me to stop, tell me, tell me now, please, but I swear, Thomas. I know what I want." She'd withdrawn a hand from where it hung at his upper back, instead running it down to the top of his chest, her fingernails ghosting over his shoulder, across his collarbone. "Do you?"

There was a skip as he paused, but when he found no reservations in her gaze, only reckless abandon and want, his mind was made up.

"Beyond a doubt." His words were hardly a whisper, lost quickly in both of their rising thoughts, in the growing cacophony of pleasure as her lips returned to his without hesitation, lost in the rising sighs and low moans as she pressed up against him, and finally, finally, they both stopped thinking and overthinking, doubting and hesitating.

The rest of the world seemed to fall away as Y/N tugged on the tie Thomas still wore, as he pulled her closer by her waistband She was breathing heavily when his lips found her neck, shivering when his teeth scraped over the sensitive skin, when his fingertips dug into her hips. It was easy for her to lose herself in him, after weeks of waiting and wanting and wishing, and easier still when she pulled on his soft curls, making him groan against her skin, when his grip on her tightened as she ground her hips down against his.

She could feel him shudder underneath her when his hips jerked, when he pulled her down against him, when she let out a soft whine. By that point, his tie was sloppily loosened, hanging crooked around his neck, and Y/N had managed to undo the first few buttons of his shirt despite how preoccupied she'd quickly become.

She had no caution left to cling to. She'd shaken him off time and time again; she'd rebuffed his unshakeable audacity, but it took her until he backed off to realize what it was she was really looking for.

Something about it all scared her, made her heart race and her head spin, but as his hands traveled further south, her pulse spiked, and she couldn't bring herself to mind it. He asked where her bedroom was; her answer was just a murmur between hot, fervent kisses as he returned to her mouth.

She knew she wouldn't regret this all come morning. She wouldn't regret it two days later, nor two weeks later, the risk of it all only compounding upon the excitement. With his skin against hers, with him picking her up by the thighs, making her yelp as she wrapped her arms and legs around him, she was struggling to remember that there was any big picture to it. There would always be her job. There would always be the election. There would always be their nosy mutual friends and a bloodthirsty political landscape. But just then, in her low-budget apartment with her secondhand furniture, as the blizzard raged on within six inches of her warm, comfortable living room, as all of Washington D.C. was buried under a cloak of snow, as frozen in space as it felt in time, the two of them were all there was.

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foryouthegays · 3 years

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Forming a secret organization [Dream SMP] liveblog and summary!

Good laugh times: 7:40, 1:18:15, 1:19:25

Protect mr philza minecraft from baby zombies (he really went all out on that bit today): 20:35, 32:40 34:45, 1:16:35

Sellout pog: 30:45, 1:00:50, 1:30:55, 2:01:15

Summary:

Techno started the stream in the Nether. He quickly went back to the overworld and to his house, where he meets up with Phil and Ranboo. He mentions that the house smells like gunpowder, and Phil quickly ushers them outside and they continue their conversation.

Techno nudges Ranboo away from the conversation, and he leaves the call. Phil and Techno watch as Ranboo leaves the house, and then Techno tells Phil his news. He talks about how taking down L’Manburg wasn’t the greatest plan, especially as he’s only one person. He wants to bring other people to their anarchist ways.

Phil agrees to form a secret organization for anarchists, because they can’t fight ten to one.

Techno and Phil go to Ranboos house, asking for a feather, and Ranboo asks if he’s getting kicked out. They say no, and then Ranboo says that he has something that might get him kicked out.

He talks about how he sometimes doesn’t remember what he does, and that he was the person who blew up the community house.

Techno asks why, and Ranboo says he doesn’t know.

Phil and Techno agree that they don’t really care about the community house, and Ranboo continues, saying that he has one of the discs. Phil and Techno agree again that they don’t care about the discs at all.

Techno and Phil leave.

Techno leads Phil to a stronghold, which he calls a ‘structure,’ and they cover it with gravel to hide it. They enter the structure, and they find a library, some useless doors, and keep exploring, finding nothing. Techno is confused, thinking that there had to have been a reason for the stronghold's existence.

While looking at a connected Abandoned Mineshaft, Techno finds an enchanted golden apple.

They go into the lower parts of the stronghold, and they find a prison. Techno mentions that the bread he found earlier tasted around 2,000 years old, which gives us a rough (and joking) estimate of when the stronghold was made.

Phil finds a strange portal, and they talk about how advanced the previous civilization must had been, to be able to make unbreakable blocks. They hear a villager writing, and dig up to a strange room.

It ends up being the igluu where Orphans parents lived, and they start laughing, but then, DreamXD logs in. He breaks the portal, and then leaves. Techno begs dream to put the portal back, because it would’ve added to the lore, and that their characters didn’t know what it was, and were going to use it as a table.

Dream logs in again, and puts one (1) portal frame block down, and then leaves again. Phil tells Dream how to place the blocks incorrectly so they wouldn’t form a portal, and he logs in to place them back.

DreamXD hears Techno joking about going to the end, logs in, and then logs out when Techno says he’s joking. Then, Techno explains the difference between DreamXD and Dream, saying that DreamXD has canonical access to creative mode, and is like God, but Dream is just some homeless teletubby. DreamXD logs in, says ‘they actually are I am the protector,” and logs out.

In chat, Techno asks ‘who was that dram fanboy, how did he get whitelisted,’ and DreamXD logs in again, hits Techno with a sword a few times, and logs out.

Techno and Phil decorate the meeting room a bit, and they start talking about what the association should be called. Techno says that he wants it to be the ‘[blank] Syndicate,’ and before they can agree on anything, Ranboos nametag is spotted, and they agree to kill him if he comes into the meeting room.

Techno puts down a sign with the organization's motto, which is ‘Sic semper tyrannis,’ which means ‘thus always to tyrants.’

He starts writing in the manifesto.

“This syndicate is formed to promote anarchy and fight tyranny in all its forms.

“We shall have no Leader; no member shall be compelled to act if they do not choose to.

“No member shall reveal information about the Syndicate to outsiders.

“Technoblade shall serve as the Recruiter to induce new members into the Syndicate with Approval from a Majority of members.”

Phil and Techno leave the Stronghold, and realize that the Igluu wasn’t actually Orphans parents, but instead a different Igluu that Ranboo had been using for Cartographers. They go back to the house, planning to meet with Ranboo, but on the way, they find a strange tower made of stone. Its hollow, but theres no chests or anything inside. They continue and meet with Ranboo, who has gifts for them. Techno gets a Netherite shovel with Efficiency V, Mending, Silk Touch, and Unbreaking III.

He brings them under his house, and we find he has a ‘comfort room,’ made of netherrack, that has several mob heads on the walls, an extra set of armor, and pets sitting next to the ladder. They talk about the map on the wall, and Techno seems concerned, or a bit scared.

Techno and Phil leave the call, and talk about how extremely strange the room, and Ranboo, was. They recount their adventure, and move the villagers into a more efficient layout. Ranboo joins them after a few minutes, at 1:38:00, and they work on curing the zombie villagers and giving them jobs

Liveblog:

I love when technos computer says he isnt streaming so he just rambles about that before it says he does and then he does the starting the streammm thing. Also if u havent heard the starting the streammmm thing u r missing out it is amazin

Techno pls get a new laptop im gonna cry

HE SAID THREE HE SAID THREE if u dont know, techno says three v nicely

“I havent even shown you the secrets, how would you guys be able to snitch??” SIR????

Oh my god is he using his phone to read chat,,,,,i hate him i hate him so much u haVE 5 MIL SUBS AND CANT EVEN GET A SECOND MONITOR WHYY

Ranboo!!! Philza minecraft!!!!! Hi!!!

5:40 ‘why does it smell like gunpowder?’ Techno there is no smell in minecraft. Lore pog?

6:45 AKDFJGLSA RANBOOS FUNDY IMPRESSION IM

8:45 ‘any second now its gonna be 11 percent updated, and thats like halfway done, if you think about it’ adhd autism solidarity right there lmao

I dont think techno can physically pay attention to lore for more than a minute at a time. He just like, sees a dog and zooms in on it while someones talking and its such a mood. All techno know is get distracted, kill orphans, protect philza minecraft, and anarchy. Love him

10:45 he just got COMPLETELY distracted w his laptop im actually crying form laughter

So uh. 17 mins in. Techno (without saying anything). Kills a zombie that was trying to kill ranboo. Thats. Thats a thing he only does for people he trusts. Uhhh

Technos voice at 21:30,,,,,,hhghn why is he like this why is he randomally doing weird voices

26:35 ‘hacker voice: were in’ HGKDFJSL

Ok but techno making fun of doors is so funny tho. Also he rlly did go all out on the baby zombie bit tdoay im actually crying

Techno when phils being chased by two creepers, a few zombies, and skeletons: i do not see it

Techno when phils being chased by one (1) baby zombie: loOK OUT PHILZA MINECRAFT

42:00 god apple poggggg

45:50 techno sir why do u know what 2,000 year old bread tastes like

Dsmp techno :handshake: minecraft story mode techno

Hating doors

Dsmp techno :handshake: smp earth techno

Living right above a stronghold

48:35 ‘dude, they had all this super advanced technology because they didnt waste time trying to figure out how to make doors’ FSKHGJDAL

50:25 UH?? WHAT IS THAT LMAO

OH ITS ORPHANS PARENTS LMAOOOO

GDFJKHSL DREAM HI

51 MINS IN HGJSKDFJASL DREAM PUT IT BACK IT WAS A GOOD TABLE DREAM

56:25 ‘listen, I’ve read a lot of mythology Phil, and nothing bad has ever happened from angering the gods.’ You SURE about that?

I will actually never get over techno making fun of dream its so funny to me 1:01:10

I am so, so extremely queer for technos planning/schemeing voice like when its kinda quieter and deeper n slower? Hhgnn

Also is latin canon in this universe? Pog

Asmr Technoblade makes a cult :)

Ok ok ok ok SO i know that techno wants to make all the members equal (and i do think that hell try his best to make that possible) but bc hes just,,,so FREAKING powerful both in terms of pvp and resources, i feel like his opinion IS gonna matter more, but also im p sure hes the writer of the arc so like. He has more important opinions anyway so unless he is v obviously controlling the other members of the group, i think this could be a fun collab thing. And i am SO excited to see all yalls analysis for what other people think of him ahhHHH i love analysis.

1:17:10 “whose idea was it to make baby zombies stronger? Why are the babies stronger?? Have you ever fought a baby in real life? I have, and it was trivially easy to defeat, Phil.” TECHNO????

Also i can NOT believe that someone thinks techno doesnt use dark humor,,,,have u WATCHED his videos?????

1:25:05 Like literally RIGHT after he makes a joke abt how ranboos shovel’ll be good for digging graves for his enemies, which was taking soooo long before

Ah yes, technoblade, the 21 yr old child 1:28:40

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backtobackbakubabe · 4 years

Text

Stuck in the Middle with You

Bakugo X Reader

Reader is a closet couponer and when word started spreading that there was going to be a mandatory quarantine to fend off a virus you weren't worried. You had enough supplies to last for months. However it wasn't until now that you realized you had no idea how to cook and you relied on take out and fast food for most of your meals. The only person who knew about your crazy couponing habit was Bakugo, so when he called and asked if he could raid your stash you got an idea.

Words: 2405

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You scrolled through your phone on your way home. Every headline was about the rising death toll of some crazy new virus making its way across the world. Work had sent everyone home until further notice and you couldn't stop the anxiety from bubbling up in your stomach. Logically you knew you were fine. You were a very clean and healthy person not to mention the fact that you had a secret stash of goods in your basement that you had from couponing.

You didn't tell people about you little hobby because you knew how it looked. Most people think couponers are cheap crazy people who just enjoy hoarding random stuff. Well jokes on them, because now you can go home and not have to risk your life over a roll of toilet paper at the store.

The only person who knew about your hoard was Bakugo. He had stumbled upon it one night when you had hosted movie night for you and all of your friends. You had sworn him to secrecy but naturally he made sure to make fun of you before returning to your friends upstairs. Shortly after that anytime Bakugo would find himself near your office he’d make a point to drop off any coupons he had collected since seeing you last. He always had something mean to say when he dropped them off. But you knew it was just his way to show he cared.

You weren't a hero like the rest of them but you had all gone to UA. You had just taken a different path after graduation. You decided hero work just wasnt for you and went back to school. You had decided to go into forensic psychology instead. Your quirk allowed you to read peoples minds, but only in fragments. Sometimes it was hard to piece together what it all meant, especially if you didn’t know them personally. So you gave up the flashy cape and now work behind a desk.

You went down to the basement to take inventory of your stash of goods and tried to estimate how long it would last. If you were smart about it you could definitely spread it out over a few months. No that you anticipated it would take that long. You were halfway up the steps back to the main level of the house when you stopped short... You had no idea how to cook.... Sure a lot of it was no brainer stuff. Dump it from the can into a bowl, pop it on the stove or microwave and done. But that was only going to get you so far. You had relied way too heavily on fast food the past few years. You had never felt the need to learn how to cook. You guess you could always look up Youtube tutor-

“Burn baby burn! Disco inferno! Burb baby burn!” You phone began to ring a very specific ringtone that was assigned to one very specific person. Disco inferno continued to blare as you got an excellent idea.

“Bakugo! What do I have the pleasure of this phone call?”

You could practically hear him role his eyes at you, “Save it shrink, I need some stuff for this dumbass quarantine but there's no fucking way I’m going to the grocery store. We both know I’d end up blowing something up.”

You tried to hide your giggles at the mental image of Bakugo fighting a middle aged women over bottled water. “So you called me? Why?”

You knew exactly why he was calling. And he knew, that you knew why he was calling. You just wanted to hear him ask nicely for once. He groaned and took a deep breath, “Listen here idiot. I know you have tons of shit in that basement of yours. I also know I personally provided several coupons that contributed to that hoard of yours.”

“So? You think that means you are entitled to some of it then?”

“WHAT?! NO! I’m just... shit y/n I’m just asking if I can come pick up some essentials. I’ll even pay you for it.... please?”

You giggled, “I’m just messing with you Bakugo. Of course you can come get some stuff... but on one condition.”

You heard him sigh and mutter something under his breath, “What do you need?”

Your grin grew from ear to ear, “Oh nothing big... I just need you to teach me how to cook...”

The phone was silent for a few moments, “You don't know how to cook? THEN WHY THE HELL DO YOU STASH ALL OF THOSE GROCERIES?!”

You rolled your eyes, “Can you help me or not?”

He scoffed, “Y/n were supposed to be quarantined... I can’t exactly hang out at your house and teach you how to cook. That is something that takes time.”

“Okay so come get your stuff and in exchange when ever you make something FaceTime me and walk me through it...”

“Are you really that bad of a cook?”

You chewed on your lip, a nasty habit you did when you were stressed out, “YES! okay.. I mean I actually dont know. I’ve never actually tried. I practically live off starbucks, take out, and the cafeteria at my office building...”

“....Fine. I’ll be there in 10 minuets.”

He hung up before you could thank him.

You went ahead and went up to your room to change out of your work clothes and into something more comfortable. You hated the formal attire you were forced to wear and usually stripped down the second the front door was closed behind you. Down to a tank top and leggings you strolled back downstairs just in time to hear a knock at the door.

You pulled the door open to a grumpy looking Bakugo who came prepared with a box to put his supplies in. “Alright let’s get this over with. follow me downstairs.”

He pushed past you, “I don’t need your help thanks. I have enough cash to cover for anything I’ll take. I need go get back home soon before they decide to lock us down.”

You rolled your eyes as you followed him down to the basement, “I already told you, you dont have to pay me. Just make sure I dont starve. And what do you mean lockdown?”

Bakugo placed his box on a table and started loading it up with canned goods, toilet paper, water, and whatever else he needed. “Yeah dumbass lockdown. Have you not been watching the news? They’re considering making it mandatory that everyone stay inside until further notice. No exceptions.”

You bit your lip, “Well surely that doesn’t apply to you right? You’re a hero. You have hero shit to do. There’s no way they’d force you to stay locked up.”

He growled, “Yeah you’d think. But with mandatory lockdown crime will go down. They may need some people to help enforce it but that's more like police work. I think their exact words were, ‘a sick hero isn't good for anything’ or something like that. So unless they really need us they’d prefer us to sit out asses at home and stay healthy.”

You bit your lip even harder. You hadn't known is was that serious. You thought everyone was just trying to be cautious but now it felt... kind of scary. You would be stuck here, all alone, by yourself. No one here but you. No where to go. No one to listen, no one to help. Sure you had practically raised yourself. You had lived off of whatever you could microwave since you were a child. Oh shit you didnt want to think about that. Not now. You had a tendency to spiral when you thought about your childhood. You couldnt do that now, not with Bakugo standing in the same room. Your mind was spinning you didnt even notice Bakugo talking to you.

He would have been irritated but you honestly looked upset, even a little pale if he was being honest. He gently took your elbow in his hand and gave it a good squeeze, “Earth to Y/n. Hello anyone home.”

You squeezed your eyes shut for a brief moment before returning to reality, “I dont even know how to make coffee.”

Bakugo gave you a weird look. He knew you tended to be a worrier by nature but you seemed like you were about to crack. “Well if you hurry up maybe I can show you before I leave. But I’m serious when I say I’m leaving in 10 minutes regardless.”

You followed him back upstairs and into the kitchen in a daze. You could feel the spiral forming. You could feel your head growing fuzzy as your heart thumped in your chest. You made it to the top of the steps when Bakugo’s phone buzzed. He answered it all the while staring at you. He could see something was wrong. You looked like you were about to faint. You knew he was talking to someone but you couldn’t hear what he was saying over the loud thoughts in your head.

You started to slump to the floor and leaned back against the refrigerator. This was it. You were officially having a panic attack. In front of Bakugo of all people. Before you knew it Bakugo was on his knees in front of you. He took your face in his hands. His tone was very soft and comforting, but his words couldn't reach your ears.

His thumb softly wiped the silent tears that were now flowing down your cheeks. You hadn't even known you were crying. Your heart continued to race as your brain did it's best to convince you that you were dying. Finally he leaned in and kissed you. It wasnt passionate or sloppy. Just a hard, firm press of his lips against yours.

Then the clouds started to fade away. You usually never used your quirk on your friends but you couldn’t help it. You were hit with a fragment of his consciousness and all you saw was an article on panic attacks. He had googled this at some point. He had read an article on what to do if someone had a panic attack. Your heart rate slowed and your breathing slowly evened out.

His hands remained cupped around your cheeks as his red eyes bore into your and watched as you came back to yourself. “Y/n nod your head if you can hear me.” You nodded your head and he eyes melted with relief. “Are you okay? I mean duh your not okay but you know what I mean...” You nodded again. He took a huge breath and pulled you to him in a comforting embrace. “Alright dumbass just try to match your breathing to mine... let me know when you're good or whatever.”

He was trying to sound irritated but you knew he was just trying to protect his tough guy reputation. After a few minutes of you leaning into him you started to blush. “Oh my god. I’m so sorry. I’m mortified.” You pushed him away slightly and leaned back against the wall. “You shouldn’t have had to see me like that. I’m usually better at... you know...” You rubbed your arm nervously and bit into your already sore lip.

He continued to observe you like you were about to shatter, “Well I wasnt going to leave you hyperventilating on the floor. I’m a hero. I’m pretty sure I could lose my license for that.”

You smirked and stood up on wobbly legs. “Well thanks... that was actually the quickest I’ve come out of one of those. Whatever you looked up worked.”

It was now his turn to blush. “How did you know I looked it up?”

You shrugged, “I saw it. Well a piece of it. You know how it is. Bits and pieces... so is that why you uh.... you know?”

Bakugo stood up and collected his phone from where he had dropped it, “Uh yeah... I remembered seeing it on some dumb tv show but I wasnt sure if it was true or not....” He looked with a weird look of concern but also annoyance, “Look you dont have to talk about it... but if you want to.... I'm here for you.”

You stepped closer and gave him a hug, “Thanks. You’re too sweet. But it’s a long story and you should probably head home before you end up stuck here.”

He put his hand on your forehead and pushed you away. “Oi I meant it when I said I was here for you damnit!” He turned around and continued on his quest to make coffee. “Besides I can’t really leave anyways...”

Your eyes almost bulged out of their sockets. “What do you mean you cant leave?”

He kept his back to you as he looked through the cabinets for a coffee maker. “Well you know that phone call I got right before you freaked out. It was my boss letting me know that mandatory lockdown is in place as of now.” When you didn’t answer he turned to look at you, “He also informed me that someone from my apartment building tested positive, so I really cant go home.”

You nodded at him before going to the cabinet that held your coffee maker that had never even been out of the box. “Okay.”

Bakugo took the box from your hands with a cautious look, “Okay? OKAY! You literally just had a fucking melt down over the fact that we were going into lockdown and now your just..... OKAY!”

You shrugged as you went to the refrigerator to pull our a bottle of water. “Yeah, I’m fine.” You took a few gulps of water before returning your attention to his confused face, “Not that yelling at me is helping by the way...”

His cheeks reddened just slightly before he narrowed his eyes, “So we’re stuck together huh?”

You sighed, “Looks like it....”

He growled, “Fuck my life...”

You crossed your arms over your chest, “I’m not exactly thrilled either alright.”

He shook his head and started pulling out pots and pans, “How do you like your pancakes?”

Your eyebrows furrowed, “What?”

“Are you def or just stupid. If we’re going to be stuck here then I want breakfast for dinner. So I will ask one more time... How do you like your fucking pancakes?”

You bit your lip, “With chocolate chips please...”

#bakugo #bakugo katsuki #Katsuki Bakugō #bhna bakugou #bakugo x reader #bakugo x y/n #bakugo imagine #bnha #bnha fanfiction #bnha imagines #bnha x reader #bnha bakugo katsuki #bnha x y/n #mha #mha imagines #mha bakugou #mha x reader #mha x y/n #my hero academia

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leonidas-writes · 3 years

Text

The Brood part 2. The tenth arrives! Clearest backstory, also the one that they didn't fully intend to get.

Elisabet was working when she got a call, answering on instinct.

"Hey, Lis? This is Catherine, from Wakefield." She remembered her. Kind, had done a lot for them, matched them with four of their nine kids.

"Hey Cat. What can I do for you?" The other woman paused, and Elisabet did as well, dread pooling in her gut.

"I know you guys were gonna be done after Apollo, but I got a case and thought of you guys."

"Alright, lay it on me."

"Female, estimated two weeks." Elisabet froze. Estimated? "No name, not registered at any hospitals. Left on the damn doorstep. No record, no way to track any parents, was just left there."

"We'll take her."

"You don't need to talk to Gaia?" There was a note in her voice that said she knew exactly why she didn't.

"No. I don't, I know she'd wanna help this kid." Catherine's voice was fond.

"You're both good people. I'm glad she's gonna have you. When do you wanna pick her up?"

"Tomorrow. We'll have a name when we come to get her." A soft laugh came across the line, and she felt her cheeks flush despite herself.

"You're a good person, Lis. How's noon sound?"

"Sounds good. Thank you, Catherine. Now I've gotta call Gaia to tell her we're adopting a two week old daughter."

"I don't envy that conversation. Good luck." The call ended, and Elisabet took a minute to gather herself before she called her wife. She answered the call as promptly as ever.

"Hello, Elisabet."

"Hey Gaia. We adopted another kid."

"What?" There was shock and anger in her voice and fuck, she could've handled that better.

"Catherine called me about a two week old girl who got left on their doorstep, no records or anything."

"And you said yes." The tone was far more understanding now, and there was a pause. "We'll need a name."

"Yeah. I was thinking something metalurgic, to cheer Heph up after Apollo said his first words without him around."

"We can't make it too overt or Minerva would be angry." She smiled a bit.

"You're such a peace keeper love. How about solder?"

"You can't name a child solder! May as well name them wire." Elisabet chuckled.

"Sprocket?" Gaia was smiling, she could hear it in her voice.

"Mm, why not go all out? Argentum."

"Oh, I love when you speak latin to me." Gaia laughed at that. "What about alloy, huh?" And then she paused.

"I hope you made a note of that."

"I will now!"

They had a name when they showed up at the agency, and Aloy was brought home in Elisabet's arms. She was introduced to her siblings, and Hephaestus was the first one to hold her. And he smiled and spoke softly and they knew immediately that he was going to dote on her the exact same way he doted in Apollo. Hades was not allowed to hold her, as he wasn't allowed to hold Apollo, because neither of them knew how to keep him from acting the way he did, cruel and cold. Aloy was loved by her siblings, though, and that was all that mattered to her mothers.

Aloy was four, and running around the yard with Apollo and Vala, chasing them as she shrieked with laughter. Hades was ten, and had never outgrown his cruel anger. So when he walked past them all on his way out, knocking Aloy over, he didnt care about the startled shout and the upset look he was given. Aloy stood back up, Vala and Apollo there and checking on her, but it didn't help her mood much. They went inside, to Hephaestus, and Aloy curled up in his lap. Aloy wasn't sure why Hades had pushed her, wasn't sure it was on purpose. So she didn't say anything about it, just curled into her oldest brother.

Aloy was six and her brother came and sat next to her. Her right eye was swollen and her knuckles were red.

"I broke a kid's nose for not leaving Minerva alone, once." Her eyes widened and she looked at him.

"Really?!" He nodded.

"Really." He looked at her, took her hand, kissed the sore knuckles. "Which is why I'm sure your hand hurts." She blushed a bit, pulling her hand away, but he just chuckled. "Long as you were defending you or Apollo, they won't care too much." She cuddled into him.

"They were pushing him around, making fun of him." Like Hades did to her, she didn't say. "I told them to stop and one of them stepped forward and told me to make them. So I did." Hephaestus kissed the top of her head.

"You've got such a big heart, Aloy. Don't let anyone take that from you." She nodded, and he kissed her head again. She closed her eyes.

Aloy's eye hadn't even fully healed from her run in with the bullies when she snapped at her older brother.

"Stop it!" He paused, one eyebrow raised.

"Or what?" She huffed, hands curling into fists.

"Or I'm gonna punch you like I did the bullies that were hurting Apollo!" Hades chuckled, smirking a bit.

"You couldn't hurt me if you tried." He crouched, face to face with her. "You're a weak little brat, what could you-" Her fist met his jaw with a solid crack, and his eyes widened. His hand pressed to where she'd punched him, and he snarled. "You little-"

"You're such a bad brother! You always make fun of me and push me and I hate it! I hate you! You're a terrible brother and I'll punch you next time too!" And her chest was heaving and he was staring and then her eyes widened and she ran to the edge of the yard, to... To Hephaestus, who he'd looked up to the entire time he'd been here, who was picking Aloy up, who was looking at him with confusion and anger in his eyes and oh, it was directed at him. Why was he angry with him? He stood, and Hephaestus pulled Aloy closer to his chest before turning and leaving. Hades huffed. And then rubbed his jaw, thinking on her words. Was he a bad brother? He'd thought that was just what siblings did to each other.

When Aloy turned seven, Hades gave her a present for the first time. And she took it, wary of what it was, opening it when she shook it and nothing happened. And her eyes widened at the small, badly made, stuffed snake. She looked up, and he rubbed the back of his neck.

"I wanted to do something to apologize. I didn't... Realize how bad I was. So. Sorry." And she stared at him for a long moment, and then hugged him, snake held in her hand.

"Thank you. Sorry I punched you." Hades had frozen when she hugged him, but he ruffled her hair now.

"Mm, don't worry about it, kid. You got a mean hook." She smiled sheepishly, and Elisabet gave Hades a nod from the side. Looks like he didn't totally fuck up the apology.

Aloy was ten when she came home, flopped on the couch, and buried her face in her hands. Minerva and Eluthia were at college, but the rest of her siblings would want to make sure she was okay. Apollo, however, walked in behind her.

"Aloy's got a crush!" A pillow was launched at his head and he laughed, throwing it back.

"A crush?" Of course Demeter was the one that spoke up first. She was grinning. Aloy threw the pillow at her.

"Shut up!" Hephaestus walked over and picked her up, ignoring her indignant shriek, sitting where she'd been and holding her to his chest.

"On who?"

"I'm in biting range of you!"

"Talaaaanaaah." Artemis smirked.

"What was it? The beautifully tanned skin? The incredible archery skills?" Aether laughed.

"Was it the rich family?"

"I will make nine robots, one specifically tailored for each of you, to ruin your lives in the most annoying way possible." Her siblings burst into laughter, and Elisabet walked out of the kitchen, smiling a bit.

"Hey, she takes after me, leave her alone." She walked over, rescuing her youngest from her brother's arms. "To be fair, I am also curious about Talanah. Tell me about her." She was taken to her room as she started talking about her friend, who was only her friend, and she curled into her mother's side, content in the warmth of this situation. When her mother started laughing, she froze, and very quickly tried to remember what she had be just said.

College was hard, but at least she had Talanah. And she'd met Ikrie, too, and Ikrie was awesome. When they'd brought her home over holiday break, she'd known it was gonna be a shock for her, finding her massive amount of siblings. Still, she could see Ikrie was nervous when they pulled into the massive driveway and saw the other cars there.

"You gonna make it, snow ghost?" Ikrie snorted, smacking her arm as she parked and killed the engine.

"Just introduce me to your damn family." Aloy laughed, getting out of the car, and she was ready. She knew Minerva. Knew the snow on the ground meant war. So she was prepared to dodge the grab at her collar, dropping and flinging snow at her eldest sister, who laughed, tackling her down. Ikrie stared, at least until snow smacked her in the face.

"Perfect shot, Heph!"

"You expected anything less?" Ikrie made a snow ball and scanned the area, trying to find her attacker. And then someone came out of the trees to her right, she turned, and shrieked, falling into the snow. Aloy groaned.

"Hades, tell me your not covered in blood."

"I'm not covered in blood."

"Is it fake blood that you're covered in?" His silence told her all she needed to know. "What injury have you got?"

"Knife in my neck." Ikrie smashed snow into Aloy's face.

"Could've warned me your brother likes to do gore prosthetics!" She grinned at her.

"Mm, nah. Too much fun to see how you reacted." Minerva was pulled off her, and she could see her brother now, fake knife sticking from his throat, blood on the knife and trailing down his neck. "Isn't that uncomfortable?"

"Very." He helped her up, and she brushed herself off.

"ALOY!" She was knocked forward into the snow as Apollo tackled her, and she sighed.

"Hey Apollo." He moved off, grinning, and then turned to Ikrie.

"So. You're Ikrie, huh? Aloy talks about you a lot." His face was shoved in a snow bank.

"You're insufferable!" Hades smiled, and Minerva and Hephaestus both laughed loudly. Ikrie smiled, her face flushed slightly. She shoved Apollo further into the snow drift.

Hades had had an interview, one where he talked about why he was so passionate about his work. And so Eluthia had declared that they were gonna surprise him. Getting tackled in a parking lot probably wasn't how he'd wanted to end his day but, joining in on the dog pile her siblings had made, hearing Hades shriek indignantly, maybe it was a good way to end it.

#horizon zero dawn #Aloy #Elisabet Sobeck #GAIA #HEPHAESTUS #MINERVA #APOLLO #AETHER #ARTEMIS #HADES #Ikrie #The Brood #I intend to do chapters about all the other kids #But I knew yesterday that I wanted to do one about Aloy

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vagarius · 4 years

Text

misukazu 21

(if you saw me fuck up the other one no you didnt)

EDIT I THINK THIS ONE GOT A LITTLE FUCKED UP TOO BUT IT’S... READABLE...

questions from this post, and answers originally written for this thread!!

If you had to change the pairing’s very first meeting, how would you change it? their canon first meeting is already so good SHDGFLJASHG but if i had to choose a different one that's still within the context of mankai... meeting as kids and losing touch and coming back together completely different at mankai

What song fits your pairing the most? uhhHHhhHHH i don't have a real answer but i do have a partial playlist for one of my misukazu aus and the only two songs in it are furaregai girl by sayuri and champagne's for celebrating by mayday parade and i feel like that says enough sldhgalsdhfalsh

What is your favorite AU/prompt idea/trope for your pairing? ALL MISUKAZU AUS ARE GOOD but. i really love any au where their first meeting is in the future and both are still kind of lost but they're Older and it's hard to let themselves fall into the easy trust they find in canon. i just think that'd be neat.

Do you prefer canon ideas or do you have your own headcanons for them? I'VE SAID THIS MANY TIMES BUT CANON MISUKAZU GIVES OFF MADE FOR EACH OTHER VIBES AND USUALLY I DON'T VIBE WITH THAT BUT THEY REALLY ARE WHAT THE OTHER NEEDS... AND I THINK EVEN IF THEY HAD TO PART THEY'D STILL BE ABLE TO BE BETTER PEOPLE BC THEY HAD MET

Favorite canon moment of them? THERE ARE SO MANY but the one that immediately comes to mind is misumi carrying drunk kazu to bed (latest bday line) because drunk kazu is so soft and it implies that misumi wanted to wish happy birthday to kazu pretty late... what did he want to give him...

Least favorite canon moment of them? hmm... there's not really one i can think of??? IM SORRY I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY I LOVE ALL THEIR CANON MOMENTS

Favorite headcanon trope/idea? (Your own or someone else’s) this is somehow both vague and very specific but i think misukazu gives off this vibe: He's beautiful. I can't tell him. or "Kazu is always beautiful~" Don't call me that, Kazu thinks. I'm not. so... insecurities i guess ????? AJSHAJJD

Favorite aspect of them/their relationship dynamics? THIS IS GOING TO SOUND SO CHEESY but i love how /real/ they allow themselves to be around each other. misukazu at their best is when one thinks "you're you. and i love that you" and the other knows this. i just. THEY VALIDATE THE OTHER SO MUCH CRIES

Least favorite aspect of them/their relationship dynamics? (Can be headcannon) this isn't a "least fav" so much as "it makes me sad" but if either of them showed any sign of not being interested anymore the other is more likely to give up then push anything. sort of like "it was bound to happen, so i'll enjoy now until they drop me" or EVEN WORSE they think the other would be better off without them and pushes them away. so yeah the fact i can see one of these happening makes me sad.

If they aren’t a canon pairing, how would you get them together? they give off "everyone knows we're dating but us" energy but at the same time i feel like they'd acknowledge there's something and just not define it bc a) they don't need to (misumi) or b) they're too nervous to (kazu). in other words i think one day they are holding hands and misumi says "kazu? is this dating?" and kazu holds his breath before asking "do you want it to be?"

If you had to take them and plunk them into another fandom, what fandom would that be? Why? i think theyd be hilarious in any sports animanga (kazu is manager tho bc noodle arms but maybe they bond when misumi walks him through some of his usual training menu one night - ahem. anyway) BUT ALSO horimiya au...

How hard is it write/draw your pairing? Scale of 1-10. AJDHAJDHSF I REALLY LOVE THEM SO IT COMES PRETTY EASILY... but sometimes you try to put them in tropes and realize they would Just Not Work Like That. idk where i'm going with this. but yeah. anyway 3 for sankaku.

Is there a pairing that you think rivals them? in terms of what i ship, i tend to ship kazu and misumi individually with a lot of dif charas AJDHAKD. but in terms of like... in-universe "rival" pairings: kazu side: tsuzukazu (maybe, lbr it would take them 273924 yrs to actually get together), kazu x someone from winter (i... have my reasons but they'd take longer than what this answer entails) misumi side: ... surprisingly none that i can think of ahdjahd

Which character of the pairing do you like more? (Would you ever pair yourself with them?) you know that tweet that's like "sometimes a ship is just your two favs"? yeah that's misukazu for me. but if i had to choose... misumi AJDHAJHDSF I HONESTLY WASNT THAT INTO YUME UNTIL THESE TWO CAME AROUND (NOT COUNTING 707)... but yeah if they wanted to hold me in their arms i wouldn't oppose

Which character of your pairing would be the one to break up with the other? Why? OOOOOH BOY well. i think it could be either of them. i don't think they'd break up for lack of love but too much love and wanting the other to be happy and thinking that the only way to give them that is to let them go. so i guess the question is which of them would be more likely to be selfish and hold on. thinking this way, i think misumi would be more likely to break-up, bc kazu has lots of friends who are better than him!! and misumi is more ready to leave if he thinks he needs to than kazu is. now im sad.

Are they relatable as characters or as a pairing? THE NUMBER OF TIMES I'VE BEEN CALLED KAZU KIN... in all seriousness kazu's struggles with speaking out and (shinobi spoilers) his uncertainty over his future hit real close to home... while i don't relate as much as misumi, his struggles always manage to tear my heart into pieces... ((oversharing alert) i guess what really separates me from misumi is his struggle with his desire to connect with family who has treated him poorly... whereas im more "lol fuck you") tldr i relate to kazu slightly more LOL

Did you once/ever dislike one/both of them? i never disliked them but i was NOT expecting either of them to shoot up so quickly into my favs list ahdjahdjf. also i started shipping them Immediately After reading summer main story so there's that

On an estimate, how many posts have you made about them? as of september 28th 2020 i make up 11/78 fics on ao3 in the romantic misukazu tag and 2/12 in the platonic one. i may have brainrot.

What made you decide to ship them? TBH I FINISHED THE MAIN STORY AND WENT "OH MY GOD... THAT'S MY SHIP" but now that i'm here i continue to ship them because they have the potential to bring out both the best and the worst in each other and i'm all about that

Favorite genre for them? (Angst, fluff, etc.) angst. i just. angst hurt/comfort all the way. im so sorry babies.

lol you thought there would just be 21 ANYWAY EXTRA 1: how do they spend breaks/vacation? they'd travel a lot when they're older!! kazunari loves to travel and misumi would follow kazunari anywhere (also, new triangles!!) so they go somewhere new whenever they have the time. however i think eventually one or both of their future careers will take them anywhere and everywhere anyway, so their "ideal vacation" might turn into an evening in, cuddling and catching up (as if they didn't already send play-by-play updates over the phone of whatever they did during the day)

EXTRA 2: first date? i don't they ever have an explicit first date, but if asked they'll cite the time they had a picnic in the park turned triangle hunt turned accidental dip in the duck pond. at least, kazunari will. misumi just tilts his head and wonders what you mean.

EXTRA 3: gifts? IM FEELING REALLY CHEESY SO I'M MAKING THIS ABOUT ANNIVERSARY GIFTS they both end up getting each other jewelry (although kazu was really really nervous bc he wasn't sure if misumi would wear it). kazu gets misumi a bracelet (with triangles, of course although misumi only wears it sometimes because he doesn't want to lose it) and misumi gets kazu a pair of triangle earrings "so we can match!" and kazunari combusts at the implications

EXTRA 4: sharing clothes THEY'RE ACTUALLY AROUND THE SAME SIZE (and tend to wear baggier stuff barring kazu's skinny jeans)... but they have completely different Styles so it's still really obvious when steal each other's stuff ahdjajdkaf. as cute as kazu would look in sumi's sweatshirt i think the much more likely scenario is kazu wrapping misumi in his jackets because this boy nEVER BRINGS HIS ANYWHERE anyway just. accidental shared wardrobe misukazu.

EXTRA 5: lake house au consider: kazunari living in a house on the shore of a lake for a summer for Art Purposes (and a little bit for Dealing With Life purposes but he's not gonna admit that) and meets his lake neighbor misumi who kazu thinks might be a ghost or spirit for a while but he actually just lives further down the lake and misumi unknowingly helps kazu with his Life Issues and maybe they fall in love

#a3 #misukazu #kazumisu #ikaruga misumi #miyoshi kazunari #a3!#act! addict! actors!#headcanons #ernb its me

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txthots · 4 years

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An estimation and analysis of Yeonjun’s chart

-virgo sun, scorpio moon- [See this is why it took me so long to get his chart out- Personally i think that he also exhibits some libra moon sign traits too in the way he comforts those he cares about (ex; the time beomgyu cried and he was the first one to come and comfort him). But in order for me to get his rising sign to be aquarius the time had to match up accordingly, but I also do see him having a scorio moon, too (i have a scorpio moon i feel like we share a lot of the same feelings). plus his moon is riiiggghhtt there next to libra, like one degree away so really with the time i feel like we can take both moon signs into considerations. After all, this is just an estimation!]

okay so. virgo sun males? greedy in bed. same for libra sun males, but the thing is, virgo suns tend to be more apparent about it; they’re picky as shit too. with his sun in virgo and his moon in either scorpio or libra (for the sake of convenience let’s just agree that he’s a scorpio moon) he is most likeluy a fuckboy. Probably got his feelings hurt once and just be getting his dick wet left and right, and then be like “oh that one girl in like the 8th grade really messed me up bro.” sike fkajrgsrrjkn probably not to that extent. We dont know if he really is one by just looking at his birth chart, but just know that the fuckboy potential is there! Scorpio moons are also very intense in bed, and then virgo suns are just into that kinky shit. these two together.... whew the DRIVE on this boy. wait till i get to talking about his venus.

-aquarius rising. I feel like he has an aquarius rising because of his sense of style and the way he carries himself. He’s got some kind of cocky air about him(not in a bad way, he just knows who he is and he’s confident in himself and his abilities). Not in the same way as like, say a leo rising would, but it a more subtle and less loud way. For example, in their first showcase that they were doing in america, the rest of the members were freaking out because it was one of their first real performances as a group... but all Yeonjun kept saying was “We’ll do good. Don’t worry.” cool as a cucumber. Confident. sexy.

that being said he’s confident in his abilities and he’s got this ambition that doesn’t seem to quit so. like i said his DRIVE. hes probably got stamina for DAYS, dog. But just be aware that aquariuans (or at least, most aquarians I know) have this complication with wanting to be loved and having attention/wanting a LOT of space. The ones I have experience with generally don’t like to show much affection and are very shy with it, so if you’re looking for aftercare then you’d probably have to initiate it and he’d probably be awkward with it and kwEKJFS WAIT TILL I GET TO HIS VENUS IM GOING TO GO INTO DETAIL MORE ABOUT THIS OKAY

-mercury in virgo. Oh god lol. If he don’t like something you will surely hear about it. But i don’t think he’s the type to nitpick at something youre self conscious about, just things he knows that you can easily fix within five minutes. my mom is a mercury in virgo. just know that if you do something weird in bed he will call you out on it when you two are alone and when he wants an upper hand... “you say im weird but you did that thing with your feet like 2 nights ago what the fuck was that? Yeah? That’s what i thought shut up.” Also. Puts you in your place. sharp with his words and says all the right things. Probably into dirty talk and will definitely be the one to initiate something kinky between you two. His mercury is also in the 7th house, so he definitely like’s hearing his partner’s feedback!!! Very important to him.

-Venus in leo. venus square saturn. And venus in the 7th house..... LORD. okay. SO venus in leo is definitely a great place to have your venus in!! Leo venuses can go all out for their lovers, give big and grand displays of affection, and be super attentive and genuine. definitely one of my favorite venus placements. these are the type of people who will go all out for their partner, most likely are more into giving than receiving, and just LOVE to take their time with their partner.... HOWEVER. his venus is square his saturn.......... LISTEN. lISTEn. I’ve dated a person who has their venus in leo but their venus was square saturn, just like Yeonjun’s. All i can say is that sex was amazing. Very intense, very pleasurable, it felt very genuine, and then it was kinky as all hell and the STAMINA. I was edged MULTIPLE times, and i think the longest time we went on was about 4-5 hours(you have to take into account that this person has different placements as yeonjun though, so other factors could probably come into play with that being said). felt like i was on cloud nine most of the time and i’d finish overstimulated and shaking and sweaty. BUT it was a VERY off and on thing. people with venus square saturn on their natal charts tend to be very closed off with their romantic feelings and their relationships in general. It doesn’t mean that they’re incapable of love, because they definitely are capable! it’s just that it’s very hard for them to continue expressing it without feeling uncomfortable. for example, do you guys remember that one time where txt were in new york, and all the fans crowded around them and showed them a lot of love? It seemed that all the other members were amazed by it, and of course him receiving that kind of love can give him a warm feeling but it can also make him very uncomfortable. He looked like he wanted to get out there real quick and i noticed that he wasn’t saying a lot... I felt that he liked it, but he wasnt in the condition to project how he felt! But of course our yeonjun has moments where he is very flirtatious and loyal to MOA (just as a leo venus would) and truly does love them, so that kind of balance is something that he has to work out in his saturn return.

-sag mars, mars conjunct pluto, mars in the 10th house. FIrey sex, literally. Sagittarius is a fire sign and they just know how to take charge. ho god, his future partner is going to be so lucky. takes the lead, is spontaneous, overall just sexy. He’s also so confident to begin with, and on top of that he’s got his mars conjunct pluto, so he’s intense, he’s passionate, and he’s got this inner strength (both physical and inner strength). he will break you. period. Both pluto and mars being rulers of scorpio, there’s a very scorpio feeling about his sexual nature and dare i say....... yeonjun is mf hung................... anyway his mars being in the 10th house, he knows he is passionate and he wants to be recognized for it. But he can get carried away, and he needs to work on balance (for example, he needs to show you he loves you with ways other than his dick!).

oh god, my head hurts. Okay

-jupiter in taurus in retrograde, in the 2nd house. Puts high value in money, food, and good sex. If you can’t put it down right he might just be gone lol. definitely an ass man. again, he has a tendency to take things to excess and needs to find a good balance.

-saturn in retrograde in the 3rd house in taurus. this just further perpetuates the idea that has a hard time expressing himself. don’t expect him to get all loveyy dovey lol. If he has a one night stand dont expect any kissing or cuddling after lol

-uranus in aquarius, conjunct his ascendant, in retrograde and in the first house. I think this makes him uranus dominant and aquarius dominant? wild when he dont care about people he really just dont care. Idk how else to put it. anyway for one, this makes him has a rebel attitude. He probably gets off on the fact that like, your parents or your best friend dont like him lol. has a bit of a 4d personality, and AGAIN, another aspect that further perpetuates that he cannot fully express himself. i feel so sorry for this man because i have a 3rd house stellium..... could not be me.

-jupiter and moon square neptune, neptune in retrograde, neptune in the 1st house in aquarius. highly in tune with your feelings. Perceptive and sympathetic. He knows what makes you feel good without you even having to say it. You could bring something up that you really liked that he did last night and he would be like “yeah, I noticed i should probably do that more often.” very creative in bed too.

-neptune, ascendant, and uranus sextile pluto, pluto in the 10th house, pluto in sag. a bit of a control freak lol. sex is probably a spiritual thing for him or something. definitely a dom, idk why i didnt say that earlier because so many things on this dudes chart screams dom. his power... this dude is literally so transformative. im serious. You know that song.... i feel like a whole.... brand... new.. bitch....... thats you after one night with yeonjun sfiuhewhK. also a crative genius in every aspect. incredibly ambitious

-lilith in sag, lilith in retrograde, lilith in the 10th house. Likes foreign partners. prolly got a hoe in every state, county, country, he been to ngl. his karmic duty is to have more faith in others and trust a little better. again, a bit of a rebel

#this shit is bout long as hell read at your own risk #long post #yeonjun smut #txt smut #yeonjun scenarios #astrology

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izartn · 3 years

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MDZS JGY fic promt

I’m thinking about Meng Yao/Jin Guangyao and I think I would love to read a fic of him snapping in the opposite direction of his desperate grab for power and respect from his shit father. We know, thanks to JGS gruesome murder that at some point, after already being a shitty human doing murdery things, JGY snapped hard and said: “if i’m gonna do the shitty things of running this sect i’ll do them for myself and fuck you to death”. Quite literally.

So I’d like to imagine a world where he, like, not necessary becomes a much better person; I dunno about the JZX and WWX kill plot, or about NMJ. I think he’s very set in his auto-preservating self-beneficing ways, and if you don’t really work well with that part of his chara then he’s not JGY anymore.

But instead of being, I’ll become the highest in the cultivation world, so i will be finally respected and listened to (uhm, didnt’ work especially well did it? they never let him forget his mother profession when it was his father who was the absolute worst) he decides that while cultivation is still something to aspire to -can’t forget about his mother dying dream, also longer life and health benefits + being a hero, doing the decent thing- he realises the cultivation sect system as it is horrible.

He was in the middle of the war, he saw it from both sides. He then went to low to high but still a servant. And it’s always blood what counts. He sees what happens to his other bastard brothers, to WWX when he decides enough is enough, and how he himself is still treated by his Sect despite his intelligence and abilities. And instead of trying to take refuge in the system, he is a bit more self-aware or inquiring; maybe he is more idealistic in some ways? But still oh so bitter, and decides to destroy the system from within.

You know what? Do it so he still rises to Leader of the Jin Sect (without prostitutes murdering and necrophilia; he is now more on the side of the common, so maybe he gets the help of Sisi or someone he knows to aid him poison his father and after he gets them a nice reward and packs them to a new life in Japan or something. Or he simply uses another subtle method without intermediaries or with unaware ones, he is certainly able of doing that when he isnt being an ironic murderer shit.) because it’ll serve him, and to be the leader responsible of making sure the so estimated Jin blood is disposesed will make him smug pleased. To slowly gain power and bit by bit erase the division between the noble clans and people who learn simply bcs of talent, scouting youngsters witht the excuse of replenishing the clans after the war and quiting the idiots nobles from their spoiled positions.

Hell you can even make LXC and NMJ (did he died before or after JGY becomes Sect Leader? Well if he is still alive, NHS doesn’t destroy him, but then WWX doesn’t come back. If he dies before, then the vengeance is still in play, but it’ll be even more fraughted bcs now JGY goals and methods are a lot more morally grey and watching WWX and LWJ confront that would be super interesting O-O), you can make them see those policies and be like, oh sure, that’s a good thing you’re doing A-yao. But also conflict with their positions in the nobility system, as time pases and JGY subtly passes more changes and brings to ruin those sect leaders more entrenched in the old ways and abusing of their people.

Programs for literacy, for the spread of knowledge and the civil use of cultivation techniques with the excuse of avoiding beforehand the formation of ghosts and resentment appealing to the lazy nature of the rich while eliminating bit by bit the necessity of their existence, like boiling a frog, the creation of the watchtowers still fits nicely and we know in canon he faced oppposition there so here it’s more important still, even more so Su She I think, will be elated with this turn of events and even more loyal lmao if JGY sells it well and JGY sells his ideas really well.

Maybe he helps XXC and SL bcs it’s in his interest they find success although he finds them naive; but JGY has a canon soft spot for people who treat him well regardless of his common born status, so. Maybe he intercedes with XY and convinces him to work with him taking out nobles reasonably (I bet XY will like that), and manages to avoid somehow XY elaborated revenge on SL and XXC? or executes him when he is too much of a wild card, but we know how that ended in canon... The best bet is making XY see on his own best interest to help in JGY vision but that’s well. almost crack fic lmao.

OH! Maybe he finds XY before the massacre of the Chang clan bcs he is searching for someone to help him above table and gets to him by offering a more subtle but still suitable appropriate revenge with the pro bonus of getting to do the same to others after and access to WWX manuscripts. You know this has a much higher chance of working, let’s go with this scenario. So he keeps XY out of his father reach, when he is searching for someone to gain control of the stygian seal and wen ning. Yeah, this will appeal immensely to JGY xD

You know, and JGY being beloved by the people, and having more than a facade of being just or fair, but proving it although it isn't in the interest of the nobles. And as he is politics savvy, although with more effort he could certainly make it so he avoids assassinations or walking in a minefield like wwx etc.

Depending on the NMJ situation... You could make it so NMJ doesn’t die and then they enter a stalemate of grudging respect bcs JGY wants more an ally in swaying people for his cause than his revenge, although he sure could make non lethal things to inconvenience NMJ lol. And NHS as sect leader wouldn’t have the same power to his decisions and reach, no matter if he is more manipulable; after all isn’t NHS a pampered noble in JGY eyes? Who could be sure if he even would follow JGY anyways...

And you could give it different endings depending on the development of JGY: a success where he gets to the point were factually the sects aren’t bloods based anymore, just a few like the lan (those traditionalists lol) resisting an unavoidable wave of change taht comes for everybody, and the money doesn’t flow in their pockets like a river to the ocean but instead it goes back to the people.

You could make it so it’s a partial success bcs JGY is still himself and does more than a few morally grey things that come to light with the NMJ murder reveal, but his changes linger and the common people plus others of the same ideal now trained and in process of being cultivators won’t let themselves be cowered by the awful nobility -another big conflict breeding, and maybe it won’t be successful but people have long memories and books and the new ideals of equality would spread regardless, so it would start again and again each time a bit better-. I think WWX POV in this case would be delicious omg, LXC conflict even more pointed. This would be, I think the more realistic and interesting to write take on the idea. Iand you now, I’m in favor of a novel setting and characterization, but to make it more painful, use the 16 gap of the show and nothing else (i haven’t see the show beyond the first episodes bcs i couldn’t take it lol) so JGY has more time to make changes.

You could make a downer ending (this I wouldn’t like lmao, but it’s there) so that shows the cruelty and inability of making changes to something so integrated and supported by itself, that JGY loses much to his revenge he takes more and more radical actions that come back to bit his ass with NMJ and JGS murder revelation. I think XY in here would be appropriate, in an antagonist role as in MDZS. But it still has an impact; JGY’s life, despite his faults was still more inspirational, made better impact than his canon self. Make it poetically tragic and a comment on the futility of trying to change society by oneself, but find beauty in the attempt itself which has created community, which will in the future do the true work of overthrowing the yokes of the high ups, educating and helping each other in their messy human lives.

All this ending, and JL conflict, who at this point has learnt much at his uncle JGY side, who has decided to (dunno about marrying QS and A-Song’s death. depending on your take and ending it’ll have different impact) go on with his labor bc he sees the good on it and swears to not be like the worst of JGY. A legacy he can reconcile with himself thanks too, to the experience of meeting WWX. JL is in a more fraught position with JC in this verse, I think, bc for one, he is more mature/not so spoiled and that would make JC glad, but his ideas are at the same time understable and anatema to JC who puts so much of his life on honoring the clan on making sure the Jiang carry on and his name isn’t forgotten but who recruited from nothing during the war. Who sees the danger in alienating the powers of the cultivation sects bc he saw what it did to WWX and he believes in protecting his own and to hell with the rest.

So very interesting!!!

You could spin so many takes from this, it’d be so fascinating and satisfying. I’d love to see the chara of JGY developed in this direction, bcs he has so much potential to waste it in so petty goals. His ambition is certainly big enough to believe he will damn well do a silent revolution well.

Just, using the classics to argue for equality and education and a good life even if you’re a peasant, using the cultivation basis and its suppose use to better oneself and the world in making a point of avoiding wars and violent retribution (to the public, he’s still a bit of an hypocrit bcs it serves him well to have a stick with which to beat his enemies lmao) and instead use diplomacy and a sort of rehabilitation or service thing. Because those ideas are there, in the different clasics and schools of thought (not confucianism, not as much) it’s just that the nobles and high scholars were never interested and used them to argue for a sort of natural hierarchy were they’re in top.

Let JGY create a new school of thought, and LXC and others seeing the merit on it. JGY has the reach and the intelligence and the ability.

The best revenge is living well and destroying the system which allowed the other to harm you, the ideas, the means. Create a fantasy fulfillment ^^

#meng yao #jin guangyao #mdzs #cql #the untamed #i think tv folks will appreciate this #meta #writing prompt

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naughtygeek49 · 4 years

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26 for Crystal x Gigi? 👀

So I would just like to say I didn't mean for this to snowball into lesbians reading to eachother while being roommates but it just happened.

26. "I heard that book is pretty gay."

~~~

Crystal and Gigi had been roommates for about a week before Crystal notcied it.

It being the lesbian flag located at Gigi's stationery desk. Crystal, who was like enthralled with Gigi before hand anyways, was thrown into a silent gay panic.

Does she ask Gigi about it? Obviously not.

Infact when she looks again the flag is gone and she wonders if it had ever been there. Maybe it had just been wishful thinking.

The flag was actually just put behind Gigi's make up mirror until she could figure out where to put it.

But the thing was Gigi couldn't tell if Crystal was gay or not either.

Sure she fit ever lesbian art stoner kid stereotype known to man but Gigi wasn't one to assume on the off chance she was wrong.

And sure Gigi was also very gay for Crystal and if they just admitted it this would be over and done with very quickly but we both know that's not going to happen.

Gigi had been let down by too many "straight" girls to get her hopes up but there was something in Crystals eyes whenever she looked and Gigi that couldn't help but give her butterflies.

So what does she do? She reads.

She, Genevieve Rosanne Goode, reads a book. She estimates that it is only her third or fourth book in her lifetime.

She starts obvious, with something even straight girls will read, 'Love, Simon' should do. She gets no response.

She moves onto 'The Miseducation of Cameron Post', again slightly more mainstream than others but not too much. Gigi gets given a questioning glance but nothing more.

It isn't until the 4th or 5th book and was slowly loosing hope that she got what she was waiting for.

"What's that book called?"

Crystal came and settled into the seat next to Gigi.

"Um, its called 'Her Royal Highness.'"

"I heard that book is pretty gay. I'm here for it."

"Its extremely gay. Its basically a well written Wattpad fanfic with every trope ever imaginable."

"Ooh funnnn!!"

Gigi smiled softly up at the taller girl.

"Want me to read you some?"

"Sure. It's not sad is it?"

Despite it not being sad Crystal still managed to cry at least twice in the space of a chapter.

"Thats really beautiful Gee. You have a soothing voice."