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papiliotao · 10 months

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꒰ 𝒔𝒐𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒆 ✩࿐

pairings: alhaitham, childe, cyno, heizou, kazuha, scaramouche, tighnari, and xiao x gn!reader (separate)

content: fluff, comfort in a way, established relationship, protective boyfriends, persistent stranger won’t stop trying to ask you out

summary: you and your boyfriend attend a party together. however, a bothersome man keeps trying to flirt with you.

a/n: unfortunately icky people are unavoidable, but the idea of being protected from them is just <3 anyway, i hope you enjoy reading this!

ALHAITHAM

Stay calm. Stay calm. Stay calm.

Those are the words you repeat to yourself over and over, echoing through your head like an overplayed melody. It takes everything in you to remain in control of your emotions and refrain from slapping the audacious man standing in front of you.

You want nothing more than to leave peacefully before things escalate to a dreadful point of no return.

And amidst all of your wishing, a saving grace comes to aid you. In other words, your boyfriend turns up at just the right moment, although you expected nothing less from someone as perceptive as Alhaitham.

“Is there a problem here?” Alhaitham asks as he walks up to you. His voice is as cold as the glacial essence of bygone winters. It’s not unusual for Alhaitham to speak in such a tone, but somehow his words feel more pointed right now.

“No,” the man blurts out quickly, regarding Alhaitham with a look filled with both curiosity and apprehension. “I was just trying to ask them out.” He gestures at you, and you internally cringe at his antics.

He really is shameless.

However, Alhaitham is unfazed by the stranger’s actions. He simply sighs and takes your hand in his.

“Good because we’ll be taking our leave now,” Alhaitham says monotonously. He begins to pull you away, not sparing so much as a glance back at the man you had been conversing with just seconds prior.

“Wh — Hey! What do you think you’re doing?” the man exclaims, trying his best to catch up with both you and Alhaitham.

Despite his efforts, he’s swept away by a tide of partygoers as Alhaitham leads you through crowds of people. It almost feels as though he had planned an escape before approaching you, observing, analyzing, and carefully calculating in a meticulous manner in order to determine the best course of action.

Once the two of you are sure you’ve successfully evaded the stranger, Alhaitham looks you up and down, scanning your body for any sign of injury. He ensures you’re alright before speaking.

“After that experience, I doubt you want to remain here any longer,” he says. Although he’s still quite stoic, there’s a certain lofty quality to his voice that makes it feel softer than it had back when he had confronted the irritating man. “I suggest that we leave right now. I was beginning to get a headache from the constant noise anyway.”

You crack a small smile. Alhaitham is as blunt as always, and that’s what you love about him. Your boyfriend is incredibly straightforward, and while other people would see his behaviour as callous or insensitive, you know that this is just how he is.

“Take me away,” you tell Alhaitham, looking into his eyes, gazing at your reflection within hues reminiscent of a breathtaking oasis in the middle of a desert.

It’s rather fitting. Alhaitham is your refuge. With him, you feel safe, and you’re sure that if any similar situations arise in the future, he’ll be by your side to defend you.

With those words, your boyfriend leads you out the front door of the party venue, and you escape into the night, losing yourselves in the bliss found under the ephemeral lamplight of a secluded night, warmed by each other’s touch.

CHILDE

“Hey, you,” you hear a familiar voice speak from behind you. You look back to see strands of messy ginger hair resting above ocean blue eyes. “I couldn’t help but notice that you were making my lover uncomfortable.” Childe enunciates the words “my lover”, making it clear that you’re already taken.

Your boyfriend moves between you and the man, shielding you.

You sigh. If this escalates any more, it won’t end well. You know Childe well enough to predict that the confrontation could get rather… heated if you didn’t stop it. However, you feel as though you can’t do anything.

“Who said they were yours?” the man talks back, smirking at Childe. He knows Childe is challenging him.

You flinch. Childe seems to be getting more and more irritated by the moment. As you glance at your lover, you notice a blaze of blue embers beginning to flare within his irises.

“Listen carefully, comrade,” Childe says, leaning in closer to the man. Your boyfriend towers over the stranger in an almost comical manner. “They’re my partner, and if you don’t stay away from them,” Childe pauses, “well, let’s just say you’ll find the consequences quite unpleasant.”

Childe smiles, and although he maintains a friendly façade, the intent of his words is not lost on the man. An icy chill permeates the air, and you feel shivers go down your spine.

Although he’s dense, the man before you seems to sense the change in atmosphere as well. He mutters something under his breath, glares at your boyfriend one last time, and leaves.

“Serves him right,” Childe chuckles. “I’m glad you’re safe now.,” your boyfriend tells you, giving you a kiss on the forehead. “If anyone ever bothers you again, just tell me, and I’ll deal with it.”

CYNO

“What do you think you’re doing?” Your boyfriend’s deep voice interjects, throwing the man standing in front of you off. He’s standing behind the stranger, gazing deep into your eyes with a look that reassures you that everything will be okay.

You smile. As expected, Cyno is as vigilant as ever, especially when it comes to your safety. Nothing ever slips past him.

“Why do you want to know?” the persistent man replies, not bothering to turn around and face Cyno. It seems that he hasn’t recognized Cyno yet because you’re sure that if he did, he would back off in an instant.

“Perhaps because I’m the General Mahamatra?” Cyno refutes dryly. It’s almost laughable how casual Cyno sounds because as the stranger hears your boyfriend’s words, his features twist into an expression of shock, undergoing a metamorphosis where all hints of smugness are replaced by nothing short of pure horror.

The stranger slowly turns away from you to face Cyno. As soon as he catches a glimpse of your lover, he freezes. Soon enough, fear causes tremors to wrack his body, and he averts his gaze in order to look anywhere but directly at Cyno.

“What’s wrong?” Cyno asks the stranger. “You’re not quite as bold now as you were a few seconds ago.” Your boyfriend acts clueless, taunting the man slightly. Although it’s barely noticeable, you see his lips turn up ever so slightly in a subtle grin for a few seconds before the expression vanishes entirely.

“I — I’m sorry, General Mahamatra,” the man says. He shrinks back under Cyno’s gaze. “Please forgive me.”

Cyno sighs.

“I’ll let you off easy this time,” he mutters, “but if I catch you harassing anyone else…” Cyno trails off, leaving the rest to the man’s imagination.

The man swallows a lump in his throat and nods furiously.

“And as for you,” Cyno makes eye contact with you, “I’ll escort you away from this man,” he says.

He gestures for you to follow him, and as he leads you away from the stranger, you feel your nerves beginning to settle. The erratic beating of your heart, the restless thoughts battering your weary mind like waves tossling a ship, and the overwhelming urge to simply run away all cease to exist. Instead, a sense of safety floods over you. It’s a calmness like no other, akin to the ambience encapsulated in quiet dusks spent with the one you love most.

Once you’re far enough away, Cyno laces your fingers with his. Although no words are exchanged, you know it’s an act of comfort, and after the hectic events of the day, you find that it’s exactly what you need.

HEIZOU

“Well, well, what do we have here?” Heizou’s voice interrupts the conversation between you and the stranger trying to pursue you.

You breathe a sigh of relief as your boyfriend comes up to you.

“You have a good eye,” Heizou says, causing confusion to riddle your mind. What is he saying? Is he encouraging the stranger to continue flirting with you?

“Thanks,” the man replies. However, his eyes narrow after a few seconds. “But are you going to try to steal them away from me?”

Heizou chuckles. “Well, it’s not like they’re yours, right?”

The stranger’s features twist into an expression of shock, and as he’s lost in a surprised daze, Heizou glances over at you and winks. You sigh. Leave it to Heizou to come up with a cheeky method to get you out of a predicament.

The man rolls his eyes, and then turns his attention back to you. He plasters a smirk onto his face.

“Come on, darling,” the man says, his voice is sickly sweet, dripping with a venomous nectar, “I’m much more attractive than this idiot, right?” The stranger gestures at Heizou, and you have to force yourself to stifle a giggle.

“I disagree,” you tell him, causing the smug expression to fall from his features.

The man opens his mouth to protest, but no sound comes out.

“Man alive,” Heizou says. “I guess I’m just far too charming to resist.” He grins at you playfully and inches closer towards you.

The stranger scowls, and turns away.

“Fine,” he sighs. “You win.”

Your boyfriend kisses you on the cheek as the man walks away. You look into his verdant eyes and grin at him, thankful that he was able to get you out of the troubling situation, even if his ways were slightly unorthodox.

KAZUHA

“Excuse me, love, is this man bothering you?” Kazuha asks as he walks up to you. He subtly wraps an arm around your shoulders, making it clear to everyone in the room that you’re taken.

You feel the tension within your body alleviate as you’re enveloped in your boyfriend’s warm embrace. Even now, his touch is simultaneously as comforting as the sun on a euphoric spring day and as calming as a gentle autumnal breeze. The discomfort that you had previously felt due to the unfamiliar man trying to flirt with you dissipates.

“Oh, is he your boyfriend?” the man sneers, glaring at Kazuha with eyes that speak of malicious intent. He shuffles slightly closer to you, and you feel shivers run down your spine.

“He is. Now will you leave me alone?” you respond bluntly, hoping that your words will be enough to make the man back off.

You feel Kazuha’s grip on you tighten. Your heart melts when you realize he’s trying to protect you. He can read you like a book, and he’s the most thoughtful boyfriend you could ever ask for, unlike the man standing before you.

You look over at Kazuha, and you notice that his crimson eyes have narrowed, the stars once filling his irises turning into pointed daggers. It’s almost disturbing to see him this way. You’re so used to seeing your boyfriend with a look of pure adoration dancing through lakes of soft red, but now he looks nothing short of intimidating.

It seems that the stranger feels the same way as you because as you look back at him, you see his gaze lock with Kazuha’s. He shrinks back, and he begins to step away.

“Okay, okay, fine,” the man scowls. “I’m out of your league anyway!” He quickly turns around and walks away.

You and Kazuha watch as he leaves. Once he disappears back into the crowd, Kazuha speaks.

“Are you alright, my love?” Kazuha asks you.

You smile contently when you hear his voice soften once more. You’re so lucky to have a caring and kind boyfriend who always has your best interest in mind.

“I’m fine, and it’s all because of you,” you say. “Thank you, Kazuha.”

SCARAMOUCHE

Discomfort flows through your veins, and shivers run down your spine. The man before you is making you feel unparalleled discomfort, and at this point, you’re wondering why your boyfriend hasn’t stepped in.

You can see him in the edges of your vision. His hair, spun of midnight, sits atop porcelain skin, and most strikingly of all, a gargantuan hat obscures his eyes. As expected, he’s sitting in a secluded corner, away from all the action, but you know he’s keeping an eye on you.

“There’s no need to act so shy,” the man tells you, stepping closer to you. He smirks at you, and you feel nothing short of disgust. “I’m friendly. I promise.”

The stranger leans in, and he’s about to wrap an arm around your shoulder when all of a sudden, someone grabs his wrist.

“Care to explain what you were trying to do with my lover?” Scaramouche hisses at the man.

When you look over at your boyfriend, you notice that there’s a certain glint in his eyes. It’s dangerous. He looks as though he’s ready to do almost anything to defend you from the unfamiliar man.

Although the stranger is stunned for a few moments, he quickly snaps out of his daze and chuckles.

“This is ridiculous,” the man says, sneering at Scaramouche.

This is not going to end well.

“Why would I feel threatened by someone like you?” the stranger glances down at Scaramouche with disdain dancing through his irises. While it’s true that Scaramouche is rather short in stature compared to the man, you think that he’s underestimated your boyfriend’s strength.

The stranger attempts to pull his wrist out from Scaramouche’s grip, but Scaramouche only tightens his hold. It’s in that moment that you see the unfamiliar man’s eyes go wide with fear and uncertainty.

“Do you really think I’m stupid enough to pick a fight I can’t win?” Scaramouche retorts.

The stranger seems to shrink under the glare hosted within your boyfriend’s indigo hues. Although Scaramouche’s eyes usually resemble a serene night sky speckled with entire galaxies of stars when he’s with you, his softer side has now vanished. Instead, his irises are filled with a coldness that the majority of people who cross him are familiar with.

Scaramouche smirks.

“Listen closely because I’ll only say this once,” your boyfriend hisses in a low tone, indiscernible to the party-goers around you, and yet when his voice reaches your ears, it almost feels as though it’s been amplified. “Leave me and my partner alone. Lay another finger on them, and there will be far worse consequences.”

Upon hearing Scaramouche’s words, the man nods furiously.

You almost laugh.

Even though he tried to appear all tough earlier, the stranger has been reduced to nothing more than a trembling coward in the presence of your boyfriend.

“Now, run along,” Scaramouche releases the man from his grasp, waving his hand as an indication for the stranger to get out of his sight. “Take this as a warning.”

Without another word, the man scrambles away, nearly tripping over himself in his panicked state. Once he’s finally gone, you hear your boyfriend breathe out a sigh of relief.

“What a bother,” he says. “Are you alright?”

You nod. “Thank you for protecting me.”

You lean in towards your boyfriend and give him a quick kiss as a reward. His lips are soft and as warm as ever, and butterflies dance around in the pit of your stomach, eliciting feelings of absolute bliss within your heart.

As you pull away, you note that a shade of red has dawned upon his cheeks, tinting his pale skin a hue reminiscent of vivid sunsets.

TIGHNARI

“Excuse me. Is it just me, or does the person you’re talking to appear extremely uncomfortable?” Tighnari asks, coming up to you and narrowing his eyes at the man pestering you. His tone isn’t the friendliest, but you don’t blame him. After all, it’s difficult to remain calm when a stranger is persistently flirting with your significant other.

The man chuckles, completely disregarding Tighnari’s words and turning his attention back to you. He smirks at you and then speaks.

“You’re not uncomfortable, right gorgeous?” he says, looking at you with an expression that sends shivers down your spine. It’s ironic. He insists that you’re alright, yet you’re feeling more and more unsettled by the second. Thankfully, your boyfriend is here to help.

“Take a closer look at their body language,” Tighnari sighs, staring intently at the man.

Although the stranger does take a few seconds to look you over, he doesn’t seem to notice anything. Instead, he simply rolls his eyes and turns back to Tighnari in order to refute him once more.

“I don’t see anything wrong,” the man scoffs, glaring daggers at your lover. He’s beginning to become slightly hostile, and it seems Tighnari can tell because as the stranger steps closer towards you, Tighnari wraps a hand firmly around your wrist and pulls you behind him.

“Since you’re not sensible enough to discern that you’re bothering them,” Tighnari gestures at you, his gaze steeling into the embodiment of desolate winter flurries as he turns his focus back to the man, “we’ll be taking our leave.”

Before the stranger can protest, Tighnari drags you away. He leads you into a crowd, and as you walk, you begin to feel disoriented. However, you assume it’s all part of your boyfriend’s plan to lose the man. Every left and every right begins to feel the same, but eventually, you end up outside the venue in a breathtaking spot where a gentle zephyr causes leaves to sing songs of blissful serenity and thousands of stars dazzle atop a canvas of dark night.

“Thank you,” you say to Tighnari once the two of you stop. As you meet his gaze, you notice that his expression has softened, and his eyes reflect the majestic skies above.

“Don’t thank me,” he tells you. “I was just doing what any good lover would do.”

He pulls you into an embrace. In the midst of evening frigidness, his touch causes a tepidness to blossom — a tepidness you wish to indulge in until sunrise paints the sky shades of pink and orange.

XIAO

Right now, you need Xiao more than ever, but unfortunately for you, he’s not here.

Xiao had left earlier in order to get some fresh air. You agreed to let him go upon seeing the distress and discomfort swimming through his warm amber hues. He told you he would be back soon, and you hope that he’ll stay true to his promise because at the moment, you just want him to show up and save you.

You just have to hold out until he returns.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go out with me?” the stranger before you asks, gazing at you with pleading eyes. You grimace under the weight of his stare, a look that feels so unbearably heavy upon your conscience.

“Sorry, I have a boyfriend.” You force the words out, trying your hardest to remain civil, even in the face of such a predicament.

The man’s eyes darken and fill with shadows reminiscent of the essence of night. Your body tenses, and a feeling of anxiousness begins to fill your heart, causing it to beat in a panicked frenzy.

“Are you lying to me?” he asks.

But just as things appear as though they’re about to escalate, you feel a gentle tap on your shoulder.

“Is something wrong?” a calm voice questions you.

It’s Xiao. He’s here, and upon realizing that, a sense of security washes over you. Your boyfriend is back, and now you have actual proof that you’re already taken.

“Xiao!” you exclaim, heart filling with elation as you glance over at him. At the moment, he looks more handsome than ever. Party lights accentuate his dark hair with various shades of the rainbow, and his irises contain dandelion hues that glow as brightly as ever. You feel nothing short of relieved to see him.

Your boyfriend looks back at you, and when you make eye contact with him, reassurance flickers through his gaze.

You’re going to be alright.

Xiao slides his hand down your arm in order to interlace your fingers together. His warmth momentarily causes you to forget all the worry that had once plagued your mind, and the tension within you unravels and dissipates, dissolving under rays of golden comfort.

Xiao looks over at the man, who appears to be frozen in shock and embarrassment. He sighs and tugs on your hand gently, signaling to you that now is the perfect time to make your escape.

You allow your boyfriend to pull you away, weaving in and out of a crowd of partygoers. He pulls you away from the commotion, and before you know it, the two of you are together alone in a secluded spot on the roof of the venue.

Xiao wraps his arms around you, enveloping you in an embrace akin to the caress of the luminous moon above. It’s comforting, and after all the turmoil, you feel like everything is alright once more.

to be honest, this probably isn’t my best work, but i hope you liked reading it! thank you for reading! if you enjoyed this, please reblog or comment!

#r.archives *ೃ༄#favoniuslibrary #astronetwrk #alhaitham x reader #childe x reader #cyno x reader #heizou x reader #kazuha x reader #scaramouche x reader #wanderer x reader #tighnari x reader #xiao x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin fanfic #genshin imagines #genshin headcanons #genshin x you #genshin fluff

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dcxdpdabbles · 3 months

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DCxDP: Professional Protector of Love

Danny Fenton moves to Gotham to start a second branch of Fenton Works. At least on paper, in reality, he is there to try and fulfill his obsession now that Amity Park has become too peaceful once he was officially crowned king.

His parents had been overjoyed he wanted to help the family business grow. They had been super supportive the day Danny revealed he was a halfa to them.

His dad even sat him down to apologize for all the hateful things he said about Danny through the years. His mom had been a little less vocal emotionally but she had also given him a deeply severe apology.

When they learned that Danny had been the one to save the town over and over again from invading ghosts, Jack jumped for joy that his son was a ghost hunter and a darn good one at that. They joined Team Phantom, keeping the world safe, and helped Danny hide his hero activities.

It really felt like Danny was part of the family business. It was a blast, even though they remained the town quacks for the first time Danny didn't mind. His parents knew he was a Halfa and they loved him anyway. That's all he needed.

When Clockwork came knocking when he was sixteen to explain that ghosts had chosen to follow the rules of conquest thus Danny was next in line for the throne, to be crowned at twenty, the Fenton's celebrated like Danny had been selected to the best Ivy schools. It meant a lot since realistically Danny didn't think he was getting anywhere with his grades.

His grades were terrible but Jazz helped him get his high school diploma by the skin of his teeth, and he was content with it. Once he graduated high school Danny felt adrift.

Amity Park hadn't been attacked in years due to him being announced as heir of the throne and no ghost would disrespect him by attacking his haunt. It was poor manners to attack the King. Ghost cared a lot about etiquette. Many of them existed because of etiquette.

The thing is Danny's ghost's existence depends on his obsession with Protection so when the ghost stops giving him something to protect Danny falls into his sub-obsession: love.

Sub-obsessions were like a secondary focus for ghosts. It was something that could grab their attention and even help them keep form but not as strongly as their main. It had its cons and pros like most things in life.

For one it wasn't as straightforward as the main obsessions. Protecting someone weaker in any situation was easier to physically do than trying to explain love and get it to appear in life. There are multiple versions of love, which makes things a little better, but Danny still has to depend on others for that to fuel him.

Danny likes to think of main and secondary obsessions in terms of running and jogging. Both got you to where you needed to go. One was just faster, and much more draining to do in the long run. The other took patience and tenacity but was rewarding over time.

The other notable characteristic of sub-obsessions was that they only appeared to ghosts who had an elemental core. Most had their common core- a core portraying to how a ghost came to be, either by death or being born in the Zone.

Danny was a rare few that had an ice core form around his common core. Most elemental ghosts were considered nobility in the zone and their rare appearance granted them special privileges.

One such privilege was attending high-class galas in the zone where he dined with the most important of beings. This was before he even knew he was going to be Ghost King.

It was at one of these Galas that he met Cupid- yes that Cupid- the ghost of love happily explained his Sub-Obession after his own core recognized a kinder spirit. Cupid said that if Danny could not be part of the love he could help others find the different ways love worked and that would help hold him over.

It was a challenge but Danny figured he could use the Greek words of love to help him satisfy his obsession.

He found that if he let his core guide him, the answer to any form of love issue would appear to him. Like his ghost breath activating, it was his sight of people who glow in different colors, telling him what type of love they were currently feeling.

Eros: romantic, passionate love colored red.

Philia: intimate, authentic friendship colored yellow

Storge: unconditional, familial love colored green

Philautia: compassionate self-love colored blue

Agápe: empathetic, universal love colored white.

Danny wanted to keep his secret identity as Phantom under wraps openly told being he could see "auras" that explain what to do.

Some called him crazy like his parents, but that changed the day after Danny spotted the soft red mixed with a chipper yellow glow around Dash and Kwan. He had pulled both individually to the side to talk about it- Kwan had been less hostile than Dash on his meddling- and only after successfully making them confess and start dating did people notice.

He became known around Casper High as the go-to person whenever they needed advice in any relationship. He even helped Sam finally connect with her parents.

Danny had a gift for it- and whenever he made them feel more love of any kind the more powerful did he feel. It was the same rush as rescuing someone but darn if it didn't have a kick to it. And everyone in Amity Park starts tripping over themselves to talk to him and hear his opinion on the issue.

Sam jokingly told him to start charging people. Tucker took the joke as gospel and created him an email and an online store. He had linked Danny's store to Fenton Works- since the business license was so open-ended- and Danny Fenton, Professional Protector of Love worked under Fenton Works before they finished their junior year.

Danny adored working as a protector of love, but his main obsession needed fulfillment so Jazz suggested a move. Take his love work to the most dangerous city in the county. Protect people by night as Phantom and by day give the downdraught citizens some help in bettering their relationships.

His parents helped him pick out a store with an apartment on the top floor, Tucker as both tech support and a clerk for his small store section of Love Charms, while Sam joined up as a receptionist.

His two best friends were going to be his roommates while they studied at Gothum U for their degrees. He would pay them but until he had a solid client base it wouldn't be a lot.

Both seemed fine with the arrangement since Danny was letting them live rent-free with their own rooms.

Jazz and his parents remained in Amity Park but they swore to visit whenever they could.

It took seven months of work but the store was ready- he styled it to look like ancient Greek Cupid-inspired decore. He also had to get all the legal work out of the way and get familiar with the city before he tried to depute as Phantom.

He figured that for now he could stick to protecting humans from ghosts, vengeful spirits, and the busload of curses that cluttered Gotham. Danny would leave human crime to the Bats while he settled. He would step in if he happened upon a situation but he wouldn't go out of his way to find it.

"Danny, do you need anything for the aura reading?" Sam asks typing away at her desk computer. She took her job seriously. Tucker was typing away on his personal laptop, likely working on some homework. "The first customer is already in the consultation room."

Danny adjusted his pure white suit with small colored lines. He had it specially made to have all the colors he saw in love as his uniform. He wanted to give off the Prince vibe of his ghost status.

"I'm good!" He calls back to her, walking down the soundproof room- to give his clients the privacy they deserve- and giving his best professional smile at the boy sitting on the plush couches inside. He designed the room to look like a Greek palace and he hopes the others appreciate.

"Hello, Mr. Wayne. I hear you need professional help with protecting the various types loves in your life?"

"Tsk." Damian Wayne, in all his twelve-year-old glory, raises his chin. "I am capable of protecting them just fine. I merely... need further information on how to show my fondness is all."

Damian glowed green- which meant he needed help connecting to his family or at the very least learning how to talk to them. Danny's smile widens. "You came to the right place for that. Let's start the ready yeah?"

#dcxdpdabbles #dc x dp crossover #Professional Protector of Love #happy valentine's day #Danny is a love guru #In a way #Took some liberties with Ghost cores #Damian found out about someone who can explain love and went Sign me up #None of the bats know Danny is here #Danny out here to fix relationships and and kick ass #Tucker and Sam just want to live rent free

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susansontag · 2 months

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I sort of feel like the fact the woman in anatomy of a fall fits certain stereotypes typically exploited in court and in public perception for negative effect / to make us mistrust her is one of the reasons why I don't actually think she killed her husband (though the film does leave the truth deliberately ambiguous). by this I mean she's a bisexual woman in a tense and crumbling marriage who has had affairs, she's quite straightforward and 'cold' in her manner as opposed to overly people pleasing and forthcoming emotionally, she will defend herself in argument with her husband without qualm or an attempt to claim blame for things she doesn't believe she's culpable for, etc etc.

her husband calls her icy and uncaring, the prosecution accuse her of seduction of an attractive female journalist, and she continues to not let up in court and to fight her corner. and after having conversations with people, including men, after watching, I wonder how many people in the audience, especially men, realise that these are common tropes used against women in the legal system to incriminate them. women are punished much more for being promiscuous and straightforward than men are in comparable situations, and this is why these tropes are played up as being so indicative of guilt in the first place. but interestingly it's the inclusion of all of these stereotypes that make me think we're probably supposed to believe that she is innocent, or at least that makes me think so, in spite of the use of tropes made to suggest she's incapable of loving her husband properly or feeling the correct amount of sorrow over his death.

but anyway, that's just my two cents. I'm actually really interesting in hearing from others whether they think she killed him or not!

#anatomy of a fall #that said I do think we're supposed to believe the kid is lying substantially about what his dad said #or at least that he was potentially lying. all evidence other than the concrete (the audio of their spoken altercation) is presented as #subjective and potentially true potentially untrue #moth.txt

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renku · 1 month

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Shared Bliss

Soloist Choi Yunjin (Jini) x Male Reader

[Part 1?]

A/N: I just feel releasing this short fic for some reason. Maybe it’s my impatient ass or something. Anyway, I truly enjoyed writing this one so I hope you enjoy it too. Let me know if you’re up for a 2nd part. Ideas are also welcome to my inbox! Good day to all!

To define the relationship you share with Jini is difficult, but to be bothered by such trivial things is a waste of time. People are going to think what they want at the end anyway.

Both of you possess the same traits; carefree, live-in-the-moment type of people, cherish, and spend the youth before it’s gone. No commitments. Feel the joy of life outside responsibilities and duties. Time waits for no man at all.

It started in the old fashion way—kicked off as high school peers that escalated until college. Ironic as it is sounds, met at the same company and now coworkers in the present. Same department, just different sections and ahead of her for a year. Taking into account Jini’s exaggerated storytelling (at least from your point of view) on why she left her previous job: the weight of just being there was unbearable. She said that she’d rather work as a waitress at a pub or something.

Sharing various moments with each other, there’s this bond and connection that felt exclusive and genuine. A safe space—comfort and no judgement. Romance? It doesn't cross your mind a bit and not would even dare to step into that unfamiliar realm.

Here’s the thing: random chances often come by to bring good things, chaos, or something in between the two. In your case, Lady Luck bestowed upon you the last one.

It was one Friday night—her occasional invites for dinner or plain drinking session are something you’ve become accustomed to. A fifteen-minute ride is all it takes. Not bad, better to spend the rest of the night outside than get bored alone.

“Still gets me,” you thought, looking at the front of her house. The amount of detail and work she put are remarkable. After a few steps, you pressed the doorbell.

“Oh, hey loser. Thought you wouldn’t come,” she said, “Just a sec. I’m coming.”

She did not even bother to ask who’s on the other side, like she don’t have any visitor besides you. After waiting for a few seconds, the door opened, and there she is—Jini in her off-shoulder dress with rose imprint.

Stunning... Captivating... Tempting.

Three words to describe the sight right before you, in flesh.

Her dress did its job flaunting her figure. Her presence that exude an intimidating aura—fierce, attitude, and boldness. One fierece look and she can make anyone kneel in a matter of seconds.

“Hey, loser. Hey!”

“What?” you replied, still in shock.

“You zoned out, are you okay?” Jini asked, you just shook your head a bit.

“Sure?”

“Yeah, yeah... Hundred percent.”

“Come in then, it’s freezing out here.”

Few common dishes and cans of beer were already placed on the table in the living room. “Not much, but that's a free meal. Besides, I’m not a bad cook,” she winked.

“Full of yourself sometimes, aren’t you?”

“I think the word ‘confident’ is what you’re looking for, mister.”

“Fine, fine... Let’s just eat,” you said, before sitting and opening a can of beer.

“Hah! I won!”

Throughout the meal, different topics fueled the flow of conversation. Some of them were about work, things in the past, gossips, funny, sad, and anything that comes into mind until all that's left on the table were the beers.

“A question,” said Jini, bringing seat closer so she can lean forward towards you across the table.

“Be my guest.”

“Did you ever think about having sex with me?”

Making a surprised reaction would not change the situation so you just answered her in a straightforward manner. “Yes, and if I'm being honest, I can’t stop thinking about it the moment I stepped inside this house. You’re so fucking hot in that dress.”

Maybe it’s the alcohol, or just courage that came out of nowhere but you still said it, and who gives a shit anymore?

Jini finished her remaining beer looking at you. She stood up, walked slowly and sat down on your lap.

“Is that true?” her focus shifted on your lips.

“Yes.”

A split second was it all took. She kissed you, and you responded accordingly bringing it to a make out session. Sloppy, wet, and warm. Jini pulled your head closer as her tongue joins the action and so are yours. It wasn’t a fight for dominance, but rather an exchange of intentions; something beyond words and better expressed through actions.

None of you can’t stop as your hand began an exploration of its own—the smoothness of the silk dress gave the impression of touching her bare skin.

Jini broke free; hazy, lust-filled eyes remained in contact with yours.

“Dress.”

“Not so fast, pervert. My house, my rules.”

“Playing tough?” you asked, raising both brows. “I’m born tough, loser. Now take that shirt off.”

“Okay, I’ll play along.”

You took your shirt off swiftly in one motion, revealing a body built for years. Astounded, it occured to her that this is the first time she saw you shirtless. Keeping the composure she displayed moments ago is crumbling.

“Happy?”

“Oh, shut up.”

She initiated the kiss again—on your neck going downwards, taking her time to taste your upper torso sending sending you into a frenzied state. Her tounge plays one of your nipples, while her finger does the other by means of making these circular motions, teasing you.

“Fuck.”

Jini’s dirty assault continues and not a word has had left her lips since. She’s acting like a predator aiming to completely devour her prey whole with no intention to stop until she’s satisfied.

“Let’s see what you pack down here,” she said, before pulling in one go your pants and underwear. Jini’s subtle gasp was still noticeable after seeing your cock.

“Well?”

“N- not b- bad...”

“Touch it.”

“Wh- what?”

“You heard me. Just do it.”

It was already erect, and Jini didn’t even hesitate to wrap her fingers around it—contact sent an electrifying feeling as she executed few, careful slow strokes. Unbelievable. It totally feels like the first time. Her jerking you off was overwhelming that precum is already leaking from the tip.

“Oh- oh, shit... That’s good!” you exclaimed, grip tightened on the arm rest of the chair. You don’t want to cum and if you’ll do so, it’s better to land it somewhere more interesting. Grabbing her arm lightly to halt her actions, caressing her face.

“Why?” Jini asked, her face blushed.

You just stared at her eyes, before brushing your thumb on her pinkish lips. She gets the hint and she knew it was going to happen anyway, sooner or later. She nodded as a ‘yes’.

Jini seemed to hold back a bit but she opened her mouth anyway, sticks her tongue out as she starts to lick one of your balls. Fucking hell. She attempted to put one in her mouth, drenched from her saliva. Jini gives a slow, long lick from the base of your dick going to its tip, tasting that precum still flowing. She takes time to know your proud member.

“Ahhh~ fuck, so good! Keep going!”

Hearing words of affirmation encouraged her even more as Jini started to give attention to your head. Putting it just inside her mouth made wonders—her tongue swirls around it and the sensation is driving you crazy. Unknowingly placed a hand on her head for support from the pleasure that travels around your body, trying not to get consumed by her actions.

Jini starts to take more by pushing herself with her tongue tracing the underside of your cock until she reache the limit—tip reached the back of her throat. Her gag reflex is evident as she holds on for a few seconds before releasing your cock with a pop. Jini catches her breath for a moment, still maintaining eye contact after what she just did.

You stood up while Jini is basically on her knees. No words were spoken at the heat of the moment.

You just position your cock right away in front of her mouth, slowly pushing the tip to enter once again and Jini willingly accepts.

Moving your hips backwards slowly until the glans remained inside, one thrust forward and from there the pace started to build up as you just basically facefuck Jini. Subtle, suggestive moans from her were signs she's enjoying it.

Lasting this long was quite a surprise as the inevitable first release of the night started to build up fast. Primal instinct took over you—faster thrusts, lewd and squelching sounds, moans of pleasure from both of you get louder and you knew holding back was impossible.

“Ji- Jini... fuck... I’m about to cum!”

One final thrust as spurts and ropes of cum went straight down to her throat, and Jini just swallowed everything. Some were escaping the sides of her lips. The high feeling of orgasm disappeared and you went back to your senses pulling out your cock.

“Yum.”

Jini catched her breath after what you just did. It took her a few minutes before returning to a more relaxed state.

She looked even more sexy; scooping the remaining cum using her finger, putting it back into her mouth.

One word and you knew the night is far from over.

“Should we head to my room? You can still fill me somewhere else, right?”

“Oh, you bet.”

#kpop smut #kpop fanfic #idol x reader #female idol x reader #male reader #jini #jiniyxxn

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ivesambrose · 1 year

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𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 💋

1. 2. 3.

Applicable to your future spouse/soulmate/partner ❤️ we're all connected either way xo

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Picture 1 (red rose bouquet)

I heard the lines, "I've got a burning desire for you baby." From that Lana Del Rey song.

You look sweet, soft spoken, well mannered, adorable, probably like a squishmallow to them and yet you can pretty much kick someone's ass if needed. You give them a, "looks like a cinnamon roll, could probably kill you." Vibe.

In their eyes your beauty not only lies in your face but also your determination, passion, it's about drive it's about power we go hungry we devour.

You're equal parts free spirited and equal parts razor sharp. Sometimes you just know exactly what to say, when to call someone out and when to be more compassionate.

You come off like an open book but it seems far from the truth, there are parts of you so hidden they crave to know yet can't help but be magnetized by the allure. So if you wish, they'd let you keep your secrets as long as you have an honest heart towards them.

Your magnetism, charm, beauty, loyalty, intuition, sensuality, voice, eye for aesthetics, literally everything is what sets you apart in their eyes. They know nobody can replicate the essence you have they wouldn't care anyway.

Picture 2 (colas with cherry)

Something about you is so eccentric they can't put a finger on it even if it's almost obvious. Your mind, body, face, hair, even your language. Could very well be that you have a cultural difference between them.

"they know so much, they know too way too much. I'm actually turned on."

You likely educate yourself a lot on different topics, different cultures, might be a polyglot too. You may have the most strange yet straightforward take on things, you could literally dip chips in icecream and eat them and honestly, they love it.

They love how weird you are in the best ways possible and they never want you to change.

They also see the side of you that can give really practical advice and be super caring and observant. They also really love the way you put certain outfits together or just your aesthetic in general.

They think of you when the most peculiar thing pops up like, "oh look a fruit bat. You know how likes fruit bats?" "Oh *insert name* would have liked this flower." "They would have loved to visit this place with me!"

If and when they're apart from you they think of how anyone would love to get close to you and honestly they get a little jealous.

Little snippets of you exists in their everyday life and more.

Your outlook, your perspectives, differences, your body language, facial features, feisty spirit, knowledge, assertiveness and "Ya I got this!" Attitude sets you apart in their eyes.

Picture 3 (strawberries dipped in cream)

You know that song by Isabel Rosa "you're so pretty it hurts, baby I'm yours..." That came to my mind.

You've gone through a lot of pain, you likely mask that with humour or channel them into your creativity, you're rather jovial, full of life and idiosyncraticities but underneath that you've gone through deep loss and turmoil. But you haven't let that make you a bitter person.

You're healing and yet you heal anyone you come in touch with. Honestly my chest feels heavy and my throat is tight, they want to hold you and just make you pain vanish.

They see you as being a lot stronger than them emotionally and mentally. They know you wouldn't judge them harshly and that being around you feels perfectly harmonious.

You're irreplaceable.

They're aware sometimes you need your space but regardless they want to be at arms reach for you.

Your faith in yourself and whatever you believe in, your goals big or small, your friendliness, your humanity, playfulness and creativity is what sets you apart in their eyes.

#free readings #tarot community #divination community #pick a card #PAC #pac tarot #pick a picture #pick a card reading

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thebiscuitlabryinth · 1 month

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[prev]

For some reason, Pure Vanilla's dreams always take place in memories. The situations may be different, and the details may be blurred and absurd, built from a collection of fragmented moments spanning his life, but the locations themselves are always familiar.

That's why it is significant, glaringly so, when he finds himself somewhere he doesn't recognise.

It isn't a small room, but it feels smaller because it is hedged in by the dark shapes of bookshelves and chests. A large desk is nestled to the left, and a window sits ahead, clearly large but covered by a thick curtain. It leaves the room swarmed with shadows that seem to watch and breathe, hardly fended off by the feeble efforts of the desk's waning candelabra.

It makes viewing the room difficult. If he had his staff with him, Pure Vanilla would have cast some light, but he hasn't had it in his dreams for a while now, so he makes do with the meagre light he has. It is enough to realise that the room is a mess, the desk chair tipped over with books, scrolls, papers and quills, many of them looking like they were snapped, strewn about haphazardly. There's an inkwell on its side on the floor, spilling the abyss everywhere and soaking into the floorboards and loose paper.

The new location makes hope spark within Pure Vanilla, but it is dampened slightly by the uneasiness born from the visible disarry. "Where..?"

"This is my old study." As expected, Shadow Milk's voice swirls around the room to greet him, and a moment later, he emerges from the nothingness of the pitch-black corner, the edges of his silhouette blending into the darkness.

He doesn't look surprised or irritated at the sight of this time capsule of a room. No, his face is blank, verging on bored, as it often is when relics of his distant past crop up. It is a welcome sight, if only because Shadow Milk has a tendency of being more seriously receptive to questions when he wears that expression.

"What happened to it?" Pure Vanilla asks quietly, his voice bouncing back loud in his ears anyway. He doesn't move from where he is standing, a little wary of disrupting the mess on the floor before him.

Shadow Milk doesn't have the same hesitation, walking all over the littered documents with his arms folded leisurely behind his back. He peers down at them with a lazy gaze, but his voice and smile is light when he responds. "Oh, nothing interesting! I was just terrible at organisation, I'm sure you've noticed."

Well, being more receptive to questions doesn't mean he answers them honestly or in any kind of straightforward manner. The fact that Pure Vanilla is here already feels like enormous progress, because whether Shadow Milk made a conscious decision to meet here or not, his relative calm now must mean that he is willing for Pure Vanilla to see this, even if he isn't willing to explain its history.

Besides, Pure Vanilla isn't entirely oblivious. He has seen scenes like this before, and he can connect the dots himself.

Shadow Milk steps into the ink puddle and drags the abyssal liquid across the crumpled papers – a clearly intentional move, because he isn't bound by gravity unless he chooses to be – as he continues to scan the mess without a care in the world. He pauses at the edge of the candlelight's reach, squinting as he bends at the waist to get a closer look at a stack of bound papers.

Then, he lights up, dropping down to sit on the floor as he picks the papers up with both hands. He sits on the line between the fading candlelight and the hungry shadows, sinking back into the darkness like it is natural, but his eyes are all bright and his smile feels more genuine.

"One of my playscripts!" Shadow Milk announces, almost sounding giddy as he flicks through the pages with an air of fondness he doesn't quite manage to hide. Then, as if he can't help himself, he puffs his chest out a little and starts proudly explaining, some of his extra eyes flicking over to glance at Pure Vanilla. "I had dozens of these lying around. I never had the time to stage any of them myself, but they were extremely popular back then. That's to be expected, since I was the best wordsmith to grace Earthbread. Still am, to this day!"

In the dim, still moment that follows, stretching long and precious, Pure Vanilla doesn't see the Beast of Deceit before him. He doesn't even see the brilliant scholar, the Virtue of Knowledge, not quite.

What he sees is a Cookie, whole and complex and alive and beautiful, and his heart pangs, softly.

Pure Vanilla feels drawn to him, to the glimpse of something real and present, the current evolution of the past that lays abandoned around them, the past he has grown fond of in stolen glances, and suddenly he is moving. He carefully picks his way across the room, which isn't easy with the mess and the dark, but he manages, tiptoeing around ink and paper.

"It's their loss, to not have my genius plays anymore." Shadow Milk sighs dramatically as he begins to leaf through the script more carefully, silently reading it line by line. An edge of bitterness peeks through his tone. "Nobody knows how to appreciate good artistry these days. What more can you expect from little mindless fools?"

When Pure Vanilla sinks into a kneel beside him, Shadow Milk's extra eyes all gravitate towards him inquisitively, even as his main pair continue to soak in the script. The pressure of them drapes over Pure Vanilla like a cloak as he clasps his hands together in his lap, taking a moment to mull over his own words.

"...Perhaps you should try having a more open mind." He says finally, not unkindly. Shadow Milk stops, still as a statue, before turning to face him with a concerning crack of his neck that, despite knowing his habits by now, still makes Pure Vanilla wince.

"Huh?" The sound is flat and loud, too loud for the shrinking boundary of the study, and it is obvious he is offended.

"I've been thinking about you a lot recently, and your situation." Pure Vanilla admits, something placating lacing into his voice as his attention lingers on that beloved playscript to avoid meeting Shadow Milk's sharp eyes. "Have you ever considered the possibility of your imprisonment ending amicably?"

"Huh?" Shadow Milk repeats, his voice more abrasive as his patience dwindles. He heard him perfectly fine, Pure Vanilla is sure, but he must want an elaboration.

"You seem to think the only chance for your freedom is to escape by force." Pure Vanilla explains, glancing up to take in Shadow Milk's face, his brows furrowed and mouth an unreadable line. "But I'm sure a compromise can be made to some degree. The things you have done are too severe to be settled by an apology alone, but- but if we can agree upon a system of redemption and rehabilitation, then–"

Shadow Milk cuts him off with a wild bout of laughter that rips through the study like a clap of thunder, hunching into himself as he unceremoniously drops the script. He tries to cover his too large grin with a hand, his many eyes pinning Pure Vanilla in place with the frantic look crystallised within them.

"You're joking!" Shadow Milk forces out through his stubbornly smiling teeth, voice gravelly and rattling with traces of laughter just short of hysteria. "Do you even hear yourself? No, no, you must be joking!"

"Not at all. I wouldn't joke about something like this." Pure Vanilla insists, seriousness plain on his face as he shifts to face him fully, a little concerned by the reaction. "Good punishments are meant to teach a lesson. As long as you are willing to learn from it, I don't see why your imprisonment couldn't be renegotiated."

The laughter gives way to a cold silence, and Shadow Milk's eyes narrow as he grits his teeth in a half-scowl, hand still obscuring half his face. "You're serious." He says slowly, words dripping with disdain. Then he huffs, shaking his head as his voice takes on a more playful tone. "Don't be silly, I've told you not to overthink things so much. Besides, the Witches," and here, his attempt at playfulness falters under a charged growl, "would never entertain something like that. Cowards, all of them!"

Maybe Pure Vanilla is reading into things, overthinking just like Shadow Milk accuses him of doing, but he can't help hearing a note of hurt in his voice. The fact he brought up the Witches so quickly speaks volumes by itself, and sorrow and pity bubble together in Pure Vanilla at the thought of what Shadow Milk must view as the greatest betrayal.

"...I don't think they'll mind." Pure Vanilla says after a moment of consideration, folding his hands in his lap. "The Witches rarely interfere with the lives of Cookiekind – at least, not since I was baked. Even when you broke the Seal and escaped briefly, they showed no signs of interference."

"Cowards." Shadow Milk mutters again with a tight, sardonic smile. "Afraid of reaping what they've sowed. Of course they don't dare to show their faces anymore!"

Pure Vanilla frowns slightly, but chooses not to comment, glossing past that to deliver his point. "That means the terms of your continued imprisonment solely relies on the Faeries and White Lily, now."

"Yes, yes, yes, do you think I don't know that?" Shadow Milk huffs again, waving an impatient hand as he leans back against thin air. "And? Are you going to, what, appeal our case to our great and wise Guardian?"

"Well, yes, that is the idea." Shadow Milk blinks owlishly at him as if that was a surprise, and Pure Vanilla adds sheepishly. "Not immediately, of course. There are more pressing matters at the moment, and I don't want to add more stress to her shoulders." Then, quietly, more to himself. "...She's going through enough as it is."

The look Shadow Milk gives him is complicated, far too complicated to parse in the sparse lighting. When he speaks, it is weighted with disdain and disbelief. "That's actually your plan?"

"If you're willing to consider it seriously." Pure Vanilla's reply is sterner to express his own determination, a little frustrated by the lack of cooperation, but when Shadow Milk remains visibly suspicious, he softens again and sighs.

Of course he's supicious. Nobody has tried to lend him a helping hand since his fall from grace. To be forsaken like that would make anyone somewhat jaded.

"...Remember what you told me? We are the same." Pure Vanilla begins patiently, keeping his voice calm and soothing as he shifts a little closer to him. "We just fall on opposite ends of the same spectrum. I could fall to darkness, but it is just as likely that you could return to the light."

"Yes, and didn't I tell you that was a stupid thing to say?" Shadow Milk muses mockingly, head lolling too far to one side for his neck to still be intact. And yet, he was playing along, the whole of his attention resting on Pure Vanilla with a sense of intruige. That was enough to encourage him.

"You did, but you also told me that people change, didn't you?" Pure Vanilla continues steadily, not hindered by Shadow Milk's lazy rebuttal. "I understand you meant that Cookies can change for the worse, but quantifiers always exist in pairs, so the opposite is also true. Cookies – you can change for the better."

The flickering candlelight makes the colour of Shadow Milk's face murky, accentuating his flat expression as he straightens his head back on his shoulders with a dull crunch. His eyes burn like shooting stars as he says slowly, overpronouncing each syllable, "Possibilties are never guaranteed."

"Guarantees leave no room for possibilities. Similarly, an endless imprisonment leaves no room for change and growth." Pure Vanilla argues back mildly, and in an attempt to connect with him, he finds himself reaching out for Shadow Milk's hand. He clasps it gently between both of his, pulling it closer to his own chest as Shadow Milk's expression momentarily shutters in surprise.

"You've been abandoned for a long time, and I'm sorry about that." Pure Vanilla murmurs, head leaning closer to make sure Shadow Milk can hear him as he warms his cold, dissolving hand between his palms. "You have done awful things, and you needed to be stopped, but it is cruel of them to bury you alive without any chance to redeem yourself, to condemn you to stagnation."

Shadow Milk doesn't interrupt. His eyes rest squarely on their joint hands, and he makes no attempt to pull away, despite his intial surprise. His expression betrays nothing.

"I know you reject the idea on grounds of impossibility, but I truly believe you can change for the better." Pure Vanilla smiles down at their hands, voice warm and earnest, and it is the truth. He looks up, making sure to meet Shadow Milk's bright, bright eyes to convey his sincerity. "I believe in you. More than that, I care about you."

The word comes out a little shy, but not hesitant. He is making a point – trying to show that even if Shadow Milk may feel like he has been abandoned to rot, that doesn't have to be the truth.

Shadow Milk breaks his stony silence with a click of his tongue.

"You care too much about too many things." He retorts, a taunting lilt filtering into his voice as the corners of his mouth curl upwards. "That doesn't mean much. It just makes you a fool with a bleeding heart."

"And that doesn't make any of what I say less true." Pure Vanilla replies easily, projecting confidence. He refuses to let Shadow Milk scare him off now. "I really do care about you."

He hesitates for a tense second before moving one hand to cup Shadow Milk's cheek, to show him in actions. Shadow Milk stiffens under the touch, but relaxes in the next blink, baring too many teeth in a lopsided grin that dances along Pure Vanilla's palm, still vaguely mocking.

"Really?" Shadow Milk drags the syllables out, pressing his face into Pure Vanilla's hand as his narrowed eyes never waver from him. The darkness creeps over his shoulders, the protection of the old candelabra gradually shrinking. "Why, I didn't think you could be such a flirt!"

"I mean it, wholeheartedly. You can always tell when I lie, you must know this is the truth." Pure Vanilla insists and insists, because it is all he can do, a strange desperation starting to form, now that he can imagine a peaceful solution so clearly. He grips Shadow Milk's hand tighter, but the hand on his face remains carefully gentle. "All I want to do is help you, if you'll let me."

It is important that it is a choice Shadow Milk makes, and not something forced upon him. It won't work if it is forced. Still, as Shadow Milk's eyes grow lidded, Pure Vanilla suddenly can't bear to watch anymore.

"So please," he whispers as he closes his eyes, body leaning forward with the weight of his urgency, "can I...?"

There is a beat where there is stillness, and then Shadow Milk lets out a soft laugh, barely more than a breath. Pure Vanilla feels him move forward, fingers brushing his dough as his hand falls away from his face, and then– then–

Then their lips meet, and his mind goes blank.

The kiss isn't gentle. It isn't harsh or aggressive either. It just is, and just as quickly, it isn't again.

Pure Vanilla's dough is burning when Shadow Milk pulls back, his chest warm like the bowels of the oven, his stomach swooping in pleasant and sickening loops. Overwhelmed as he is, it is horribly difficult to open his eyes, but he is compelled with a need to see his face.

Unfortunately, even when he manages to force his eyes open slightly, there isn't much to see. The candelabra is quickly going out, its retreat inviting in a darkness that Pure Vanilla cannot see anything in, let alone the details of a face. The only proof that Shadow Milk is still there at all is the feeling of his hand in his, and the familiar presence of his gaze.

"You can try," Shadow Milk answers from the darkness, a teasing smirk audible in his words, "if you really think you can convince the Guardian of something as elusive as mercy."

Pure Vanilla nods quietly, certain that Shadow Milk can still see him even if the opposite isn't true, his tongue unable to find words quick enough to answer verbally.

When he wakes up, far later than he usually does and well behind schedule, his face is still glowing with leftover heat. He presses his cheeks into the cool surface of his pillow, and feels something in him settle, satisfied.

I can save him.

[next]

#i wrote a majority of this in a mad burst of inspiration. bone apple teeth!#also there is one part left in this series after this. take that as you will :)#shadowvanilla #vanilla milkshake #pureshadow #echo paradox au #the biscuit library

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iznsfw · 11 months

Text

The Devil's Telephone

IVE's An Yujin x Male Reader Smut

6969 words

Categories | model!Yujin x photojournalist!you, rough sex

Barely edited. Who cares, I did great.

"Is it true? What they say about you?"

You're nervous, fidgeting in the king-sized bed with your arm leaning against the mattress. It feels odd to be in a rich and attractive girl's place without being naked. Not that it's something you've experienced before anyway, but it's like breaking an unspoken law everyone but you was oriented to. But you have your manners, and so does she. Supposedly.

She's still beside you, her expensive clothes hiding not her shapely form. And to think it looks beautiful without the need for oil painting all around it or nakedness. That pretty smile, that also intimidates you a little, is the cherry on top of the cake that is An Yujin.

Speaking of, there's one right now between her lips. She's toying with its strand of a twig, tracing the cherry she got from the bowl beside her bed along the pink hills of her luscious mouth.

"After everything I did," Yujin says, "what do you think?"

"I don't really…" Struggle to find your words. "I, I don't really dwell on—"

"If I'm a slut or not?" Yujin finishes for you, smiling teasingly.

This conversation's a mistake, now that she's using words about a subject you tried to tread on lightly. "Look, I'm not trying to be rude or anything, I'm sorry."

"No offense taken. I get it."

Yujin lifts herself off her comfortable lounge position on her bed and instead sits on the backsides of her legs. Her hands are on your lap rather than her own. Should've been a sign for you that this is going nowhere but in a downward spiral.

"You want to know if the rumors are true? If nepo model An Yujin's really a slut, like they all say?"

"Uh… sure?"

Yujin gestures her chin to your crotch. "Whip out your dick. Then you'll see."

"You've got to be fucking kidding me."

"I'm not," says Gaeul. "Say that one more time and your career's over. No going back."

The small smile that's an everyday accessory to her features is gone. That tells you that what she says is what there is to her statement. What you hear is what you get. There's no underlying tone to it; she's completely serious, and besides, when has Gaeul ever lied?

Wring the looped lace of your camera over your head and place it and the device that can make or break your career on her desk. "Nope," you say. "I'm not doing it."

"You will," Gaeul says. "Nobody else will do it."

"Can't you get Jiwon to show up there?" It's worth a try, right?

"Like I said, no chance. Rei's with her on vacation. And Yunjin is out of the question."

"God fucking dammit."

Looks like this day can actually get worse. First, you miss the taxi going to the studio, ending up being about an hour late to your meeting. And then the nervous intern almost spilled coffee all over your camera. Luckily, the scalding liquid only ended up mostly on your pressed shirt. It's like the day is toying with your feelings, trying to see how far you can get without breaking down.

Your eye twitches. The day might see your breaking point after all.

"Gaeul," you say, "I'm a photojournalist, not a fucking Seattle professional."

"And so are a quarter of the people who go to the fashion week," she counters. Gaeul exhales through her nostrils, then leans forward on her desk, hands folded. "All you have to do is stand in for Chaewon and take the photos for each model. Don't worry about the caption."

"How'll I know what they're wearing?"

"I can do that for you. I'm quite the fashion enthusiast, if I do say so myself."

You don't see the sense in it, like, at all. "Then why don't you go take the photos?"

"Because I don't want to, newbie," replies Gaeul simply. She swings her legs over the table and places her palms behind her neck. "You can sit here all day whining about I'm-a-photojourn-this and I-can't-do-it-that, but you're still going to go through."

Gaeul's a rather straightforward girl, yet she can still make her blunt words sound frightening. You have to show that you can hold your own, too, and that you're not going to back up. Ever.

"And why do you think I'll give in so easily?" you challenge.

She smiles. "Because An Yujin's going to be there, and unless you live under a fucking rock, you'd know she's the main attraction."

You aren't dumb. Of course you know her. It’s impossible not to know of her when the magazines all scream her name and the camera flashes crave her presence. It’s hard to navigate life without at least seeing a Yujin standee for one of the brands she sponsors or her face on soju labels. She’s become a household name that, even if you somehow wished it to be the other way, she's become an inescapable force in every Korean’s life. That’s just how it works. It’s been like that for as long as you remember.

She rose up in the industry at a young age. Being her age, you can remember the buzz she creates among your classmates, from head-over-heels, hopeless romantic boys and adoring girls (and a few girls who'd die to be able to touch her, too.) She's on their phone wallpapers, in another cutesie pose, and on the photocards in the back of clear cases. She's here, she's there, she's everything everywhere.

You're familiar with her, but nothing about her except the usual: she's a model, she's an idol, she's a—

Ah, how should it go?

The girl beside you at the event, who's rather tall and if circumstances were different should be on the runway herself, tells you it goes like this: "She's an international free-use backstabbing slut."

Well, you didn't expect Kazuha to say that so easily (she told you her name earlier just so you had something to call her during the mandatory small talk), but you know what she's talking about. However, you have no right to say Yujin's a slut when you're dressed… well, dressed like this. Your whole outfit is an embarrassing array of rainbow colors. Even your tie's pulled into passiveness by the colorful dress code. If this is what those high fashion enthusiasts call "fashion," you're glad you're not a part of them. You'll be glad to keep shopping at your local thrift store.

Hence, "I wouldn't put it that way," you say.

Kazuha smirks. "How would you say it?" she asks.

Why is she so interested in what you think about her? You suspect Kazuha's one of those girls who's rather jealous of the stick-figure models strutting the runway but would deny it with all her soul. Maybe that's it. She's jealous that she sits there in the audience while perfection after perfection makes themselves known to the public.

"She's…" You snap a pic of another eighty-pound model walking down the runway. "Uh, promiscuous. That's all."

Kazuha grins. She purses her lips and writes down on her notepad, probably intending to use your statement as a headline pun. "Maybe we should switch jobs," she says. "You can be the devil's advocate journalist, and I can be the white knight photographer."

Exhale loudly. For fuck's sake, you want to tell her, I'm only here to do the job I didn't want in the first place. Why has she chosen you to play with to fulfill her boredom? Whatever game she's set, you're not joining.

"Look, what is it about Yujin that you hate?" you ask.

"She fucked Jang Wonyoung, those MCs she used to partner up with, that actress from the period drama who was on Produce, too… everybody."

"Okay." You look at her pointedly. "Source?"

Kazuha gestures a rude index to the runway. "Look at her. Look at her and tell me she isn't a slut. I dare you."

You look up from the lens of your camera for once, and as much as you'd like to come to Yujin’s defense, seeing as there’s no evidence to all those allegations and being a public figure with all the criticism must be the deepest ring of hell, you see what Kazuha means.

You hate to say it, and you’d love to pass no judgment, but the prodding journalist is right. Yujin isn't skin and bones like the other models, nor does she wear light makeup. However, her confident gaze that not once settles on the floor immediately makes you think, wow, now that is a model. She only looks forward, stepping onto the smooth floor in heels that make her much taller than she already is. Her eyes are lined with this sharp, blaring dark that makes her brown contacts stand out and makes her look like a black cat. So much for Jiwon’s nickname.

But that isn’t all. It’s far from done, because it’s not Yujin’s arrogant smile that drips of sultriness that confirms Kazuha's allegations for you, nor is it her makeup. It’s what she’s wearing. Her chest nearly spills out of the oddly-cut neckline of her blouse, and it’s see-through, meaning that even if her busty figure is in some way contained by the clothing, you can still see everything. For example, her tummy lined with her abs and a small tattoo (barely noticeable, but enough to cause a few tabloids to freak out); her wide hips, and of course; the bare flesh of her breasts. The fabric tape does nothing to hide them when her brown nipples beg to be seen through the fabric. Each bounce coerced by her confident strut is out there for all to see, and so are the jiggles of her full thighs.

Which part of everything do you have to immortalize in a photograph? You don’t know. You just keep taking pictures. There’s plenty enough to create a video of her walk without actually having to record one.

Seeing your dropped jaw, Kazuha grins satisfactorily. “Told you,” she says.

You aren’t done looking, though. As the press and audience scream her name, (they all know her name—she’s bagged so many brand deals, shot more than enough magazine covers, and performed songs you couldn’t count on two hands just so that any type of audience can recognize her), Yujin steps up to the end of the catwalk. She smiles at all the attention, setting a hand on her waist before blowing several kisses to the audience.

And, of course, she finishes off her umpteenth walk with another scandal:

Shredding her blouse into pieces. Yujin rips it clean from the seams, letting the lost dangle of fabric finally reveal the whole of her chest. Her skimpy shorts are the only thing remaining complete on herself.

The viewers gasp, and you do, too. But you're hypocrites, the lot of you, for you remain interested in scanning every bit of her enviable body. Secretly, you all know that some part of you were looking there even before her blouse ripped.

You haven’t seen a model do that before, but then again, she’s not just a model. She’s plenty of things: a singer, an idol, an ambassador—

A slut. A full-on, shameless, lives-up-to-her-name slut.

“So.”

“So,” you say, resentfully. Your camera’s in your bag, and Gaeul is on the phone with you. You’re proceeding out of the vicinity like everybody else. It's eight p.m.; someone’s bound to be hungry at this hour, and that someone is you.

You can hear the giggle in her voice as she asks you, “What do you think?”

“What do I think?” you say, flabbergasted. Zip up your satchel bag and walk through the rain. “Gaeul, the girl just ripped her shirt off in front of everyone! This isn’t what I signed up for!”

What should you get tonight? Minute Burger? Maybe McDonald’s or some sushi? You’d take anything—you’re pretty hungry after the long show. If this is how hunger hits after shows, you’re glad you don’t have to go through the whole fashion week. By Saturday, you’d be as dead as everyone was after the stunt Yujin pulled.

“I thought you knew about her, newbie,” replies Gaeul. She’s clearly poking fun at your reaction. What’s also clear is the obvious fact that she picked you out for this job just to see how you’d handle it. Would you go crazy? Treat Yujin as a Victorian man who’d just seen a lady’s ankles would? Oh, she’d love to find out.

“I didn’t know she was…"

"Yeah?"

"B-bold.”

“Oh, please be normal about it. You’re a photojournalist. You handled the dead guy who was stabbed alright, but a woman showing her tits is where you cross the line?”

“It’s not that,” you say tiredly. Your stomach is really growling now. “I guess… I think…”

"Hey."

Your phone drops to the wet cement road. Like a haunting phantom, Yujin appears out of nowhere. It's like she suddenly materialized from the fog of the storm.

You don't know where to look. Yujin's still dressed, (somewhat), in her ruined blouse. The thing is even more transparent as the rain beats down on it. Still, she looks perfect. She is perfect. You know that without having to be a fan of her.

The light from a camera hidden in a beaten bush makes you flinch. If the crouched man in black taking photos of Yujin isn't there, you'd have accepted your fate to get struck by lightning. Yujin raises her eyebrows questioningly, and you're forced to compose yourself once more.

"Uh, hi," you stammer. Bend down to pick your sodden phone up. Darn it, it's dead. How will you contact Gaeul now?

"You're one of the photographers, right?" asks Yujin. Unlike you, she doesn't care that your phone has met its end, or mind that her boobs are out in the open.

You mutter something of agreement, but you're still tinkering with your phone. The battery's probably broken, which's a pity when your late mother gifted it to you on the last birthday you had together.

"Damn, must be nice to snap photos of a half-naked chick, huh? You liked seeing me up there?"

That makes you stop fiddling with your destroyed gadget. "I," you say, cornered into confession but still trying to gather a burst of energy to escape, "I'm not—"

"An Yujin," she says, as if the whole world doesn't scream her name. As if she were just another girl out there who's a little too friendly. She doesn't offer her hand; she grasps yours and shakes it firmly.

You have no other choice but to be acquainted with her there and then. You tell her your name, albeit nervously, as you slip your phone into your pocket. What is she planning? Why is she out here with you?

Yujin grins. "Nice to meet you. Want to come to a party at my house? Starts when we get there."

Now you understand what she's planning. What else would you expect from her?

First things first, though: where should you look? Her chest is a dangerous option. To look or not to look? That is the question—you choose the second option. Note the dim stars in the foggy sky. Look down at the road blotted with raindrops. Remark inwardly about the state of your shoes and how they're too expensive to be dragged through a weather like this.

Second, should you go? Gaeul would be looking for you. She'd want the pics immediately so she could put them in the magazine and on your company blog site. But you haven't had fun in years, and for a girl with the wealth and status of Yujin, it might be a new beginning.

Work, however, comes first.

"I'm sorry," you tell her. You really are. Yujin seems like a fun girl outside of her wildness. "I don't think I—"

"Great! Come on, I'll drive you!"

That's how you end up in a limousine for the first time in your life and learn that An Yujin doesn't take no for an answer.

The seats are dark and soft, and there's two long aisles of it for thirty pax max to occupy. However, despite the spaciousness, Yujin still chooses to sit snugly beside you. Should you feel flattered? Intimidated? You struggle to choose for this question.

You wonder where you're headed. The infamous Jang Hills where celebrities like singer Son Seungwan and model and humanitarian Jang Wonyoung, who owns the place, reside? The rain is too strong for you to be able to see where the vehicle's headed, but you suspect that's the destination. There's no other.

"So," says Yujin. She's still sitting comfortably beside you. Her smile dimples her cheeks, and it just doesn't match the boldness of her ripped blouse. When she wears that smile, she looks like a girl who's too cheerful and innocent to be… the way she is. "Would I have to pay you to see my photos?"

"For god's sake, Miss An, put on some clothes before you scare the guy," chuckles the driver, shaking his head. He's a tall, dark man with the typical shades and a rosary on his rearview mirror. You wonder if he prays for Yujin sometimes.

"But that's no fun," she says, the pout on her face growing wider when her driver tosses her a black fur coat (that still reminds you of her when you note how the chest part is gone) and sleeveless innerwear. Seems like he keeps clothes in his car for situations like these. "Clothes are so big and boring, you know. Totally outdated.

"Anyway, about the photos…?"

"Oh, you don't have to pay," you tell her. But you know that money isn't a problem with Yujin—she can buy you and your whole life if she chose to.

"Gimme then." She makes grabby hands, and your camera eventually ends up in them. Her eyes sparkle with narcissistic adoration. "Oh damn, I look hot. Delete this, though. Bad angle."

"I– okay."

"My tits look amazing, don't you think? Come on, say my tits look fantastic."

"Ms. An," says the driver firmly, albeit his tone holds some of the amusement in it still. "Put on some clothes."

Yujin rolls her eyes, but she does. And you watch as she strips, painfully slow. She pulls the soaked blouse above her wet body, showing her bare, beautiful arms and pits. Even her soft midriff is perfect. And, try as you may (must), you can't stop looking. Several snaps and pinches would be too weak to pull you back into reality, because there's the goddess that she is to look at. You figure out now why your former classmates were and still are obsessed with her. She may be a wild little thing, but she's got an amazing body, an amazing fashion sense. Everything about her, even her boldness, is enviable. Desirable. Unreachable.

The clothes mold to her beautiful shape. The damp, slightly messy hair only adds to her beauty. You can feel yourself getting warm.

"We're here," says Yujin cheerfully, oblivious to the way your eyes are raking down her perfect body. "Here's your camera. Wouldn't want it to break like your phone. Pity."

Getting up to open the car door isn't part of a wealthy girl's everyday life. Yujin isn’t an exception—she has her driver to do that plus assist her out of the limo, and when he does, you're welcomed into a whole new world.

The rain has halted. Signs of its earlier presence, however, can be seen on the drops on the maze of bushes. There's statues of Eros, gray and mighty with his strong arms and arrows, perched on pedestals to the entrance of the mansion. Through the gate, you catch sight of a large pool, where heiresses and friends of Yujin laugh and swim. It's no land for lowlives. You are the exception, somehow.

"This… this is your house?"

"Yep!” She nods positively. “Daddy gave it to me after he died from a heart attack."

"My condolences," you say. As the guards open the gate to Yujin's mansion, you admire the place. It looks like a temple for cupids. Perhaps it’s Yujin they’re worshiping. "Did he have heart conditions before that?"

"No." She shakes her head then waves happily to one of her friends at the pool. "He just saw me wearing a bra over my crop top, and he dropped dead."

You snort. Yujin looks at you weirdly. That's how you realize she isn't kidding.

"You're serious?"

She opens her mouth to say something, but forgets it. It's a long story that doesn't need more sequels.

Just the second drink of the night and you’ve met more celebrities than an average person would see personally in their whole life. As the dazzling disco ball shimmers rainbow colors all over the place, you catch sight of more than plenty of pretty and handsome faces. Over there is Jang Wonyoung, one of the models who walked earlier, and Miyawaki Sakura, a famous CEO of more beauty lines than you can count on ten fingers. Whether their beauties are handcrafted or God-given, they all have something in common: they’re all A-listers—they’re relevant, popular, used to this wild lifestyle. Camera flashes have trained them not to flinch at the gliding lights. This is an everyday routine in their book.

However, you’re used to being behind the camera, not in front of it. You’re overstimulated by the sea of laughing, moving bodies and the loud music. While Yujin happily screams and downs several shots, you stand idly beside her, dizzy and tired.

“I don’t think I can handle more.”

“Past your bedtime?” asks Yujin, grinning. She waves at Wonyoung and points at you, mouthing something to her, to which the model winks in response. You wonder what kind of exchange the two models had that granted an unusually smug look on Wonyoung’s face. You’re certain it’s about you, but you don’t know what it’s about. You’re not even sure if you want to discover it.

“It’s not that,” you say embarrassedly. “I’m… I’m not a party person. I get lightheaded easily.”

“Wanna take a break? Go to my room?”

Now that’s a red flag. It doesn't even try to hide its true color; it waves proudly in front of you. You’re the bull who went straight for it.

Yujin’s bedroom is the size of your living room, with a large bed to match. Curtained pillars stand on each end while posters hang off the walls. You suppose that the people on them are the ones Yujin looks up to: IU, known as Lee Jieun whenever she ventures out of singing and into acting; Marilyn Monroe (no explanation needed), and a few other nameless models and actresses. A lot are old posters of seventies’ pornographic films. Lights frame the mirror on the dresser table.

“You’re a privileged girl, miss An,” you say. It’s the only way you can respectfully say that she’s kind of a spoiled brat. But maybe that’s your jealousy talking.

“I know, right?” replies Yujin, twirling around. “And please, call me Yujin. You can sit on the bed if you want to.”

Your mind toys with the idea of the posters on her wall debating if you’re the hundredth person to have come over or the thousandth. Nevertheless, you want to stay neutral; it’s none of your business anyway. So you take a seat on the edge of the softest mattress you’ve ever felt while Yujin does so, too. She kicks her boots off on the carpeted floor.

“Hey,” says Yujin, “want to play a game before you doze off?”

Just how many red flags does this girl have? “Er, sure.” You shrug. Maybe it’s just a game, nothing more, like she said.

“Since we barely know each other, let’s take turns asking each other questions. Dibs on the first question.

“I haven’t seen you in shows before. How did you end up there?”

A safe start. “One of my coworkers was sick,” you explain. “I had to fill in for her. My turn.”

“Hit me.”

“Did you take modeling classes?”

Yujin laughs as if it was the funniest thing she’s ever heard. “God, no,” she says. “Classes and workshops are scams. All I had to do was ask my daddy to ask for a spot for me.”

“Must be nice.”

“Right? Did you take classes for photography?”

“I took one of the scams, yeah,” you say, earning a giggle from Yujin. “I’m a journalist first. It’s all I know.”

Meaningful silence fills the air. You remain hooked on your sentence, realizing how true it is. Photojournalism is the only thing you’re good at. It’s sheltered you and brought you so many opportunities at the same time. You don’t know how to find other hobbies to make your forte when you’re stuck in its bubble, and its bubble only. Without your camera, you’re nothing. Without people like Yujin to take photos of, you’re nothing, too.

You suppose you should break the heavy silence. But you’re unsure if your question should be asked; it might trigger a violent response from her, although she’s been nothing but laid-back with you. And you don’t particularly want a rich girl to ruin your career. You’ve gone so far that the only direction to look at is forward.

But you must learn to take risks.

"Is it true? What they say about you?"

Speaking of, there's one right now between her lips. She's toying with its strand of a twig, tracing the cherry she got from the bowl beside her bed along the pink hills of her luscious mouth.

"After everything I did," Yujin says, "what do you think?"

"I don't really…" Struggle to find your words. "I, I don't really dwell on—"

"If I'm a slut or not?" Yujin finishes for you, smiling teasingly.

This conversation's a mistake, now that she's using words about a subject you tried to tread on lightly. "Look, I'm not trying to be rude or anything, I'm sorry."

"No offense taken. I get it."

"You want to know if the rumors are true? If nepo model An Yujin's really a slut, like they all say?"

"Uh… sure?"

Yujin gestures her chin to your crotch. "Whip out your dick. Then you'll see."

You’re flustered. Did Yujin—this tall, alluring model that’s got her whole life ahead of her yet nothing to lose, this irritatingly attractive Yujin—really say that to you? Or was it something lost in the swarms of shouts and music from outside of the room? Maybe you’ve misheard. Maybe you’ll keep playing safe tonight.

But those are just mere maybes with no connection at all to what’s about to happen.

“Can’t do it yourself, pretty boy? Let me help you.”

Yujin lifts your satchel bag from your shoulders. You find yourself raising your arms to help her. It’s like the what and tension in the air have infected you and made you into this heated, lustful character far from the real you, because if this were truly your own self, you’d say you had a career. You’d say this shouldn’t be happening. You’d leave the room instead of helping her unbuckle your belt. You’d do anything but this.

Perhaps she’s changed you.

Yujin slips a tongue along the path of her luscious lips at the sight of your bare thighs and cock. “Our friend here,” she says, “needs a little help from me, no?”

“Yujin…” you moan, and it’s humiliating, especially when barely anything sexual has happened yet. At least, anything sexually physical.

Luckily for you, she curls her fist around your dick and gives justification to your breathy sounds. Maybe the rumors about how she likes to get around are true; Yujin knows how to work her way with a cock. Her warm fingers jerk your flesh at just the right timing, letting the hardness build up before doing that too with the pace. She’s looking at you with this wild desire in her eyes that grows bigger when your erection does, too. Oh, and that smile—if looks could kill, An Yujin would already be arrested for your murder.

“Now that’s not so bad, is it?” she remarks. She spits on your cock. Her wet saliva coats your length with just enough to let her smooth palm slide along itself pleasurably. “You like this? Just wait until you feel my pussy. Or maybe my lips would do first? The higher ones, I mean.”

Yujin’s lips descend onto your shaft, welcoming it into an impossibly soft and wet heaven. Yujin’s little tongue flicks at your base gently, even daring to lick at a little part of your balls before working their way up. It deliciously slides upwards at your veins.

“Fuck, Yujin. Your mouth—fuck, it feels so good.”

“Mmm.” Yujin engages in an open-mouthed, sloppy kiss with your tip. “I know. I’d fuck me, too, if I could, but I have you to do that.”

“Right,” you say breathily, because she is. If she’s sucking your cock this well and her cheek’s painfully stimulating as your cockhead brushes it, how much better would her pussy be? You’re definitely fucking her, even if your experience in this is zero. Yes, that’s also right: you’re a virgin. Zero experience, no bitches.

But, if it means anything, it’s the other way around. It’s Yujin making you her bitch. She may be serving you with the lips and kisses of a good girl, but her eyes tell you that there’s more to it than you think. You’re hers, see, for this night, and that’s all you ever will be. You’re no photojournalist anymore—you’re Yujin’s one night stand, and that’s the only achievement people will ever remember to your name.

“These’re so fucking full,” murmurs Yujin as she admires your heavy balls. Sucking on them lightly before smiling up at you, she adds, “Make sure to blow all of it in my face, ‘kay? Promise me.”

“Think you can handle it, Yujin?” you ask, and it’s another embarrassing moment you’ll relive forever, for your cockiness will never get on the level she has. Your voice shakes too hard and your cock drips too much—it’s clear who owns who at this point.

“I’m a big girl.” Unfazed, she smiles. “I can handle myself.”

“Y-you sure?”

“Oh, don’t play hard to get it, baby,” Yujin coos. She pleases you with one hand and glides her fingers on your thigh with the other. It’s deadly. She’s deadly. “Let your guard down. It’s just me.”

“And you’ve said that to how many people?” you shoot back.

“More than you’re worth,” she quips. She winks at you. “Now cum for me.”

Ouch, but it doesn’t matter when her lips provide a great suction to cool the burn. It’s making your cock feel the heat instead, forming the tightness in your stomach more. Her hands massaging your thighs causes your sensitivity to reach an all-time high. Yujin’s covered your shaft in such an amountful that just one lick sends your toes curling. She licks, she sucks, she laps at your weak spots and delights in the upward push of your hips, but her hands keep your legs down. Can’t have her meal escaping. She wants all of your cum, and when Yujin wants (no, needs) something, she gets it. It’s how she’s navigated life, having everything her heart could ever want brought to her by whim. But if she has to work for your cum, then so be it. Either-which-way, she’s not giving up until she gets it.

She kisses your cock deeply, almost making your lips jealous. She sucks on each sensitive side and your dripping tip. What takes the cake, though, is how she downs the whole thing so suddenly, slipping itself inside her tight throat and letting you fuck it. Gasps can’t be contained by your pursed lips, and their cycle of repetition continues because of her. Because of Yujin, Yujin and her stupidly desirable mouth.

“Fuck,” you whine. When she hears that, she pulls away. Like rain, drops of semen make slick landings on her face. You keep expelling several shots of the thing she so desperately wants, and you realize that, even with your own pleasure being fulfilled, you’re still serving Yujin. You’re still giving her what she wants: your cum on her face. The fact that she’s playing with you remains stoic.

“Ah, this is the best.” Yujin licks her cumstained lips. “I could have swallowed it all like I did with these cherries here, but I can’t let it spoil the main course.”

“W-which is?” you inquire, still panting. Can you handle more?

You find out through Yujin taking off her black vest. Then, she slips out of her jean skirt. It hugs her lower figure so nicely that it nearly makes you mourn their departure, but you find a better thing to gawk at, and it’s Yujin’s ass and thighs. She may have dressed earlier, but the panties were off. She cares not for modesty, even outside of the modeling industry. It’s just not who she is.

For that, you’re glad. If Yujin were modest, you wouldn’t have had the chance to see her fat ass and shaven pussy up close. You wouldn’t get to see her sway her hips side to side, letting you see from behind how her ass ripples and bounces, or let you peer at her dripping thighs.

"You're weaker than all the others," Yujin notes. "I like it."

Should you be offended? Probably, but you aren't, because there's her approval. There's her saying that she likes how easily you break. There's her on the bed with her pussy spread by her fingers, revealing her tiny hole and needy clit.

There's a lot to look at is what you're saying, and a lot to take in consideration. For example—

"Ohhhh, fuck," moans Yujin. She rubs her core and gets a feel of how wet she is. "I'm so wet, see? I'm so, fuck, wet from blowing you."

Yujin leans against one of the pillars of her bed. What makes the sight of her masturbating hotter is that she's still covered in the face with cum that soon drips down her neck and onto her collarbone. She looks like she's been used incessantly, to the point where no amount of cock or finger can help her reach a good enough high. Although you're still sensitive, you begin to jack yourself off to her.

"Shit. Ohhh." Her head tosses backwards and she shuts her eyes. "This feels so good. Make me feel even better. Use your mouth."

It's all about what she wants, but you find out that you also want to put your mouth on her. Stop jerking off to kneel on the floor and place your hands on her thick thighs. You have no idea how to do this except from porn, but she moans loudly when you flick your tongue upwards, so you must be doing well.

Yujin's so wet that she dribbles on her expensive sheets. The feminine scent of her drives you crazy. Due to that, you pick up the pace of eating Yujin out. She's delicious. Better than any expensive meal you got going out.

"Oh, fuck," mewls Yujin. She grinds her clit down on the flat of your tongue. "That's it. Eat me out like that."

Next, guide your tongue to her slit, catching the juices she has. Push it inside, make her thighs suddenly clamp around your head. Painful, but worth it, because as useful as her makeshift earmuffs are, you can still make out her heavy moans.

“G-good, god, so good. Don’t you stop, don’t you fucking stop.”

“I won’t.”

The force of your mouth holds nothing back as it holds Yujin’s nub captive. She pulses in your mouth, and you can sense that she’s close because she’s screaming. She's squirming, she's writhing, she's—

“Stop.”

“But I, I thought you said—” You were having such a good time, too. Why did she have to ruin it?

Yujin giggles. “I wanted to cum on your cock,” she confesses. Sweat rolls down the sides of her face. “Let me?”

She’s subtly assertive like that, asking you first before making you do it anyway. She’s so used to getting her way, so used to letting people bend reality into the form she wants. And you’re becoming one of those people, as you lie down on the bed and let her mount you. You don’t suppose anyone would refuse either—her splayed lips rubbing your tip seems like a good thing to have in exchange for being under her ownership.

“Fuck,” you curse. Maybe this is better, in hindsight. Her hole grasps for you, but she teases it by only letting her clit glide along your cock. “Miss An, ah, Yujin, you’re so—”

“Pretty? Successful? Tight?” She sinks down on your dick with a smirk that differs from your weakened look of bliss. “Yeah, I’ve heard that before.”

They’re all perfect adjectives to describe her, but you weigh in the most on the last. Her soaked slit swallows you without time to properly take it in. She just keeps bouncing on you, a millisecond going unspared, as if she’d die if your cock weren’t ramming in her all times of the day. By her desperate moans, you think you’re right. They’re heavy, hanging onto your mind for too long that it just makes you throb harder inside.

You reach up to grab her tits. The bra-like innerwear she dons blocks you from experiencing the whole of it, and Yujin takes that into consideration, through which she pulls it up her arms and off herself. Her bust now moves up and down freely, looped in your mind like a constant reminder of how lucky you are to have Yujin fuck you. She may get around a lot, but whoever she fucks is like her: a hell of a catch.

You lift yourself up to suck on their brown nipples. She moans ferally. Her pushing your head deeper into her tits is how you realize you’ve wanted to do this, to suck and play and slap her chest, ever since you saw them be set free on the runway. It’s funny how two mounds of flesh can hypnotize you just like that. You’re trying to defeat the impulse actions they convince you to do, as if they were spiritual entities on your shoulder each to twist your decisions. But both are devils—even from their source, it’s clear that An Yujin is no angel.

“Yes, so good!” she screams. Her eyes are shut as she rides you with an impulse and speed that surely can’t be human. The pleasure she unleashes onto your cock as her pussy clings and gropes it must be the embodiment of the deadly sin of lust itself. It was written before in holy books, preached as a warning in churches. There’s no explanation for how angrily she impales herself with your cock. “Your cock’s too fucking big, I’m going to cum all over it!”

You spank her ass, and the plentiful skin wiggles right back into your hand. Seeing her face twist up into this pained yet blissful reaction inspires you to continue. That and your cock entering and exiting her hole, plus your kisses following the path of her neck makes Yujin go crazy.

“Fuck me!” She’s fully unhinged when she cums. Her short yet sharp, alliterate downward thrusts of her core leaves red on your thighs. She’s kissing you with this hunger that’s been fulfilled, in a way, but with which comes gluttony. She can’t have enough. She can’t have enough of your dick. It starts to scare you how she’s like the girls your pastor warned you about in Sunday school—she’s a gluttonous nymphomaniac greedy for things that aren’t good for her. Aren’t good for you.

Having sex with An Yujin makes you debate if you should go back to your religious roots and pray again. You’ve heard about the devil hiding behind human faces, and she completely fits the criteria: charming, deceiving, gorgeous beyond human comprehension. However, her divine body also can be something holy. It’s something that’s more than worth worshiping.

Which is which: evil or good? Angel or demon? A goddess who descended to earth or something far, far more dangerous?

Whichever, you just busted a load inside exactly that.

“So.”

“Hm?”

“Come on, tell me,” you say. Yujin’s teasing banter piques your curiosity to higher levels. “Did you really fuck all those people, or is it just,” shrug, as if you couldn’t care less when you do, “you know, hearsay?”

Yujin strokes your chest thoughtfully. The aftermath of the rough sex has left her almost invalid, but after a shower, she’s good to go. You followed suit after.

“The devil’s telephone,” she whispers.

“Huh?”

“Here. You know where to call me.”

#kpop smut #izone smut #ive smut #an yujin smut #ahn yujin smut #izone yujin smut #ive yujin smut #yujin smut #male reader #x reader #reader insert #pov smut

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hinakazino · 4 months

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Losing In Romance || Kashimo x Reader

Summary: Arranged Marriage AU! Kashimo as the strongest sorcerer of his time, and you, the only daughter of your clans main family are set to marry in an attempt to strengthen both bloodlines.

Warnings: Angst, no comfort, ooc kashimo maybe, mean kashimo (?), kashimo in denial, part 2 maybe.

Kashimo Hajime is known as the God of Lightning, he who has never been defeated, challenged by 1000, and who achieved victory every time. He is no doubt the strongest descendant from the Hajime bloodline, but it is not a battle he is in today, it is a wedding.

This isn't just any wedding either, it is his own. He didn't agree to this, his family did supposedly for his sake, he knows for a damn fact it's not. They're just desperate to have a child they themselves can control, one that can enhance their bloodline.

Kashimo hates the fact his family came up with such a keen excuse to motivate him too, "what if this child is strong enough to surpass you?" his mother had said. He understood what she was implying, albeit not straightforwardly spoken, but he wasn't that desperate.

Now here he stands, looking down the aisle at his soon-to-be wife. He's only seen her a couple of times, but each time he can see that she's only ever glanced at him with admiration. He is happy to have someone who respects him at least, but that's as far as he'll go, just respect, he doesn't see much of you besides that.

You find yourself nervous as you walk towards Kashimo, softly chewing your cheek in anticipation as you took your last steps up to the altar. You'd adored him the moment you'd laid eyes on him, it was a little crush, he's pretty and cute. Which you thought, not knowing that you'd fall deeper in love with him even to getting married.

You weren't stupid, you knew, this was an arranged marriage. You expected nothing more and unfortunately it was obvious to you too, Kashimo's disdain for this. He was a man of freedom, who let anyone challenge him to a battle of which he never backed down from.

You loved his carefree nature, the way in which he saw everyone equally and never underestimated anyone. To you, Hajime Kashimo was a astonishing man, and whoever he chose to love must be quite the lucky lady.

Still, guilt welled up in your heart as you remember yet again today that you are but chains holding him down. Even so, you find yourself staring at him adoringly as he lifts the veil to uncover your face. You find yourself still caught up and lost in his gold irises, representative of the lightning power he possesses.

The wedding went by in a flash, however the memory of Kashimo's soft lips against your own was still present looming in your mind. It was a weak, amateur, almost pathetic kiss, however it felt like heaven to you anyway. It was your first, and you didn't believe there was more anyway.

The manner Kashimo held your hand in his whilst he effortlessly slipped a ring on your finger made you internally squeal. Even if this was one sided on your part, there wasn't anyone denying your hopes. For the potential future you wanted, you smiled warmly placing a ring on his finger as well.

It was no secret this was your first time experiencing such sensations, and maybe Kashimo had before already, you wouldn't be surprised if that was the case. Men were allowed much more than women in this era, plus, he was beautifully powerful. Who wouldn't want him?

After your wedding, everything pretty much went back to normal. You'd been given a wonderfully crafted home to which you and Kashimo now lived in. Surprisingly, or maybe not really so, Kashimo was very straightforward. "Let's skip to the chase, our parents wanted this, I don't know about you but I swear I will not commit adultery, and I will stand by my vows," he'd stated. Kashimo had waited for your response, his face serious as he stared down at your small form, only to see you nod, "I understand and agree, I hope we get along," you stated, shyly smiling.

It was more than enough for you to be in the same vicinity as him. You tried your best to impress him in your own way, taking note of what meals he liked, cleaning the house, and keeping yourself in high spirits. All the traditional duties of a house wife really.

You made sure to greet him every morning, tend to him when he was injured, and made sure to let him speak his mind whenever he needed to. Kashimo wasn't cruel so he treated you with respect, but everything else beyond was just blank.

That was the best way to describe the situation and feeling. He was only acting out of respect, nothing more. Sometimes you'd see him clenching and unclenching his fist at important gatherings. His family and yours constantly pestering for a child.

You felt responsible for being an annoyance to him at times, but also sadness as he never even tried to approach you in the act of well, love making. Not that I deserve it, you thought. You could only feel your heart sink to your stomach as you'd caught him that one night.

Kashimo had thought you were busy dealing with your parents that night when he'd decided to meet an old friend. Hakari was there, he was a good guy, and Kashimo always came to him to talk. Mostly for fun, but today for advice.

"...I don't love her, I don't think I can ever love her, I know she does but I can't bring myself to see her that way," he admits, defeated. Kashimo slumps on the balcony, swirling his drink as he confesses whats been on his mind. Hakari sighs and pats him on the shoulder, trying to comfort his friend Hakari adds, "nothing wrong with that, love is a natural thing."

Hakari had witnessed first hand the family politics Kashimo had got swept up in. He understood that if he was in Kashimo's situation, he'd be somewhat miserable and guilty too, after all you didn't force this on him either. Hakari continued, "look, I'm sure eventually both families will see this isn't working, you can wait till then or do something on your own--"

Kashimo winced at the thought, it wasn't like you were a stranger to him anymore, in fact you were a great friend, he wouldn't mind keeping you around. However, he disliked the gut wrenching feeling of seeing your face when you finalize how he still feels.

Kashimo sees more than Hakari ever will, he sees your worry for him, he knows your expressions, he notes the way your eyes light up when he's within the vicinity and he feels happy, warm inside, but it's just appreciation yeah? "Yeah, we'll see, I'll think about it," he states before downing his drink.

The rest of the conversation becomes a blur, you couldn't bear to hear the rest after the part where Kashimo stated how he felt. You began walking away as your vision blurred, tears softly dripping down your face. You somewhat hated Kashimo too, for still treating you so well upfront despite the circumstance.

It turns out that no, you weren't with your parents, you'd gotten annoyed at their persistence. Had shouted at them even since you loved him. Deciding to leave for some fresh air onto a balcony. Where you witnessed what you now wish you hadn't, the truth. You knew this, everyone knew this, it was a fact, Kashimo didn't love you. It was just much more gut-wrenchingly painful to hear it yourself, witness the truth spill right between his beautiful lips. Curse my love for him, you thought, walking away deciding to just leave on your own tonight.

The worst part you hadn't really accepted yet, was probably the point that you also could tell both Kashimo and Hakari knew you were there. But decided not to pretend they were talking about another matter, just that you weren't there.

That night you left the party alone because it was no longer enjoyable, you felt pain and emptiness. Your unfortunate state unfortunately noticed by all around you, your parents, Kashimo's parent, and those gossip girls your age who snickered as you passed.

You didn't want them to see you like this, so weak, but despite walking away, the incident still followed you home. Plaguing your mind till the latest hours of midnight. The horrid thoughts just keep flooding in, never seeming to find a way out.

Part 2 !

#kashimo x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #kashimo hajime #hajime kashimo #anime #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #hajime x reader

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voguescapes · 1 year

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h. styles | vanity fair

pairings. harry styles x famous!reader

about. harry and (y/n) are guest on 'vanity fair' to do a lie detector test together, revealing multiple secrets from the pair.

warnings. not edited so disregard any errors, jealous harry cause why not, not my gif, kind of bad writing, a little cursing here and there. lmk if i missed something!

note. hiii everyone! i don’t know if i’m beck yet but i’m just going be leaving a quick fic because it’s been a little over three months which is outrageous!

She rolled her eyes and shook her head sarcastically. "You're supposed to save the best for last, you should go first." Harry placed his hand over her and kissed the side of her head. "My girlfriend, everyone."

"Are you ready? I came up with some pretty interesting questions these past few days that I've been dying to ask you." She grinned.

“I was born ready. Plus," The singer smirked, looking at his girlfriend with sparkling eyes, "I get to ask you some questions after, so be careful with what you ask, babe, because it might come back to bite your ass." He winked and her face flushed a bright red.

Harry turned back towards the camera and clapped, "Let's get started!" A crew member laughed and instructed (Y/N) to move to sit at the other side of the table so they could attach Harry to the machine.

"Arms up." The man demanded sternly. Harry observed her blank, emotionless face and then turned to his girlfriend with furrowed eyebrows. She shrugged and wiggled her eyebrows at him causing him to break the silence and lightly chuckle. The man silently sent them glares, which they both ignored and continued making silly faces and giggled as quietly as they could.

"We're ready." A crew member called out from behind the camera breaking (Y/N) out of her daze and she looked at the man controlling the polygraph machine to ask a few questions.

"Alright, I'm going to ask you a few short, straightforward questions to calibrate the machine." Harry exhaled loudly and wiggled his fingers before nodding, gesturing for the man to proceed.

"Is your name Harry Styles?"

Harry nodded making the woman command him to answer verbally. His girlfriend snorted and stifled a laugh while he mustered out apologies.

"Yes."

"Are you 28 years old?"

"Yes."

"Finally, are you nervous?" He looked up with squinted eyes, something he did frequently whenever he was thinking about something.

"Uh, knowing (Y/N/N), kind of." He chuckled breathily. The woman nodded and laughed along while the polygraph operator gave her a thumbs up to begin.

"Okay, Hazza, first question! Have you ever fallen in love?" The man visibly laughed at how simple her first question was. "Of course. With you." She smiled at his kind words, practically feeling her heart melting. She looked at the polygraph examiner, seeing him throw up a quick thumbs up.

"You're too cheesy sometimes. You guys,"

(Y/N) spoke towards the lens, "pray for me. I have to deal with him every. single. day."

"Hey!" Harry exclaimed, lifting his hands in the air with an offended expression etched on his face. She turned to the camera and rolled her eyes in a jokingly manner before moving on to the next question.

"We watch Marvel movies quite often together. I work for Marvel, am I your favourite marvel actor?"

"Bubs, you're an actress." Harry spoke. (Y/N) shook your head and he tilted his as he awaited her response. "Haz, knowing you, I’m surprised that you of all people would say that! Anyways, women should be considered as actors too and not just actresses. After all, male and female doctors are both called doctors, not doctors and doctresses." She stated in a practical manner.

His voice changed pitch as he tried to imitate her. "Fine." He replied dramatically, pretending to flip his hair back with his hand.

"So, out of all the Marvel actors, am I your favorite?" She smirked and fixed her gaze on his middle and index finger, already tapping nervously on the metal table.

"Yes."

She touched her heart dramatically.

"That's a lie." The man behind the machine called out. (Y/N) dropped her hand and her smile fell. "Harold!"

"Okay, it's RDJ. I'm sorry, love." Harry cringed, shocked that the machine picked up on his lie so quickly. She narrowed her eyes and looked back down at her phone. "That's fair. He's everyone's favourite." She mumbled grumpily.

"Does Gemma actually like me?" Harry confidently nodded his head. "Absolutely. She adores you." He responded sweetly. She turned her head to the operator. He nodded towards her, "That's true."

She swiped her hand across her forehead, wiping imaginary sweat. "Good to know."

"Would you consider yourself to be an overly affectionate boyfriend?" She questioned. It was a question she thought of frequently. Harry loved to cuddle, hug, kiss, hold hands, and essentially shower her with love whenever he had the chance, but she wanted to know if he knew of his actions or if he would just do it subconsciously.

"Um, no. I think I'm just about the right amount of affectionate." And it was true, he actually thought that he wasn’t overly affectionate. She choked back a laugh and covered her face with her hand, quickly looking back down to her phone in hopes of finding a different question to quickly move on to.

"Hey, hey, wait! I saw that! You think I'm overly affectionate?" He inquired, his voice going at least 3 octaves higher. "I'm the one asking questions here, Hazza." She winked and scrolled for a question in her notes app.

"Do you think our children would be cute?" She questioned as a sweet smile prominently appeared on her face. She decided against asking if he wanted kids because he had already confessed he did a few months back. It was the purest, most heartwarming conversation she had ever had.

Harry looked at her as if it were crazy of her to ask that. To him, the answer was obvious. "Absolutely. I mean," he pointed in between the two of them, "look at us." He replied cockily. She eyed him, but eventually shrugged, realising that even though he sounded like such a dickhead in the moment, he wasn't wrong.

"Next. Does size matter?" She giggled, watching her boyfriends face contort.

"You're asking me that? What I think? Or what I think you think?" He questioned, waggling his eyebrows.

"Answer however you'd like." The corners of her lips lifted and her face contorted into a mischievous grin. Harry pondered for a while, furrowing his eyebrows as he searched his brain for a good response. "No, I don't think it does." He answered. “That’s true.”

"Okay! Next, Do you think if we met on The Ellen Show, we would have never gotten together?" She inquired. This was a question that she would often ask herself, however, she never had the courage to actually ask him in fear of some form of rejection, so she’d only ponder it while Harry was sleeping soundly beside you.

"Yeah. I think I would've seen you on instagram and slid in your DM’s or something." He admitted. The examiner nodded.

"Moving on. Have you ever lied to me?" She inquired. Harry pursed his lips and sighed. "Yes." He answered honestly.

"Elaborate, please." (Y/N) said, looking at him expectantly. "I’ve know you for over three years now, I’ve lied to you thousands of time." She nodded and moved onto the next question.

"Would you consider yourself to be a heartthrob?" She asked. She was aware of the huge fanbase he had developed since One Direction, people adored and swooned over him and his lovable characters in some of the roles he played.

"Yes." She turned to the polygraph operator and she nodded, "he's telling the truth."

"Damn right, my boyfriend's a heartthrob and he knows it." She said proudly as she looked into the camera.

Harry chuckled and rubbed his eye as he anticipated her final question.

"Last question. Frankly, the most important question. Does pineapple belong on pizza? This could determine the future of our relationship, Haz. I want you to really think about your answer." She warned dramatically. Harry pursed his lips.

"Yes. I think. I like pineapple on pizza, actually." (Y/N) clapped happily and puffed out a small breath of relief. "That's my baby!"

"Alright, my turn, loser."

Harry scoffed loudly and switched his attention to all the cords wrapped around his body parts. He frantically begged the man to remove all the 'gizmos' and 'doo-dads' as quick as possible.

Once he set the singer free, he pranced around the tiny room and threw his arms around his girlfriends body, giving her an enormous hug. "Love you." He mumbled in her hair.

The man then instructed her the same way she had done to Harry. "I can do this." She repeated for the millionth time in the last 5 minutes while a member of the crew hooked her up to the machine. They attached a series of different wires and cords around her chest, fingers and arm.

"I'm scared." She laughed, placing her hand where her heart was. She could feel it pumping quickly.

"Just to let you know, your questions were shit. Mine are actually spicy." Harry teased, excitedly scrolling through the questions on a page in his notes.

He would finally be able to ask some questions that he'd been dying to know about her that he was just too embarrassed to ask on a normal occasion. He hoped some of his questions/some of her answers would reaffirm some things for him.

"Shut up, Styles. I can see you were sweating through your shirt. You're not slick." She smirked, making him lift his arms, where there was a tiny yet noticeable wet patch on the fabric of his expensive shirt.

"Okay, Harry, you can begin asking your questions." The man called as Harry embarrassingly lowered his arm. (Y/N) facepalmed and giggled quietly at his foolishness to herself.

"Okay. Is your name (Y/N) (Y/L/N)?"

"Yes."

"Are you 26 years old?"

"Yes."

"Am I your boyfriend?"

"No." She lied.

"It jumped." The man called, "We're all good."

"Okay," Harry sighed, "I don't know what I would've said if that came out as true." He laughed. "Imagine?" She giggled.

Harry shook his head and read his first real question. "Do you think I'm overly affectionate?" Harry raised his eyebrows while he stared his beautiful girlfriend down. She chuckled and shook her head at his expression, "You're seriously still hung up on that?"

"Just answer the question!" He demanded over-dramatically. "Yes." He gasped and the crew members behind him attempted to cover up their laughs with coughs and sneezes. "But I like that about you. I enjoy your cuddles. That should be considered a compliment." The man confirmed her statement and Harry grinned like a toddler who'd just been told he was going to Disneyland.

"Do you want to get married someday?" He inquired, hope laced in his tone. Although the both of them had spoken about this before, he wanted to make sure. She hesitated for a second, but eventually nodded.

"Yes. As long as it's you." The man blushed and they could hear members of the crew letting out small 'aw's' as they watched them both intently.

"Or Tom Holland, to be honest."

"You just had to ruin the moment." He said moving on while (Y/N) giggled quietly at his disappointment. He swore he heard the serious, monotoned man laugh too.

"The internet made several memes about me after I gushed about your tattoo you got with Emma during our autocomplete interview. Would you get a matching tattoo with me?"

"Of course." Harry’s mouth dropped and turned to the operator for confirmation. He looked up at Harry’s hopeful eyes and nodded. She was telling the truth.

"It's official, everyone, we're getting matching tattoos first thing tomorrow!" Harry deadpanned into the camera, making her publicists laugh in the background.

"You write poems, a lot. I can confirm that," She let out a giggle and nodded her head. "Would you ever write and a poem about me?"

"Um, here’s the thing. I already made a poem or two about hot." She pulled her hair behind her ear nervously. Harry shook his head, his earrings bouncing side to side.

"Which one?" Harry asked childishly, causing her to nervously smile. "Dandelions.” She smiled at the excited boy.

He looked at the camera and mouthed “I knew it”.

"Next… you're known for being a very private person. You've never been public with any of your relationships before me." She nodded. "Out of all these relationships, am I the best boyfriend you've had?" (Y/N) rolled her eyes, expecting to hear the question sooner or later. "Yes, you idiot."

"She's telling the truth." Harry pumped his fist in the air and internally congratulated himself. "I'm so proud of myself, sorry." His cheeks turned red as he noticed everyone waiting for him to get over himself and get on with the next question.

"Before we met, did you listen to any of my songs other than from One Direction?" He rested his head in his palm as he watched her quizzically.

"Um, Duh! I was literally obsessed with you!" She said confidently, thinking back to her fan girl era.

"I already knew the answer to that, I just like hearing her say that she was in love with me." His response made her giggle softly.

"Do you think about the future a lot?"

"All the time."

"Am I in it?" She blushed lightly, "Always."

Harry smirked, repeating one of her previous questions. "Does size matter?"

"You really just took a turn in the opposite direction." She laughed, sending a 'Jim face' towards the camera. "Answer the question! Or else I'm gonna..."

(Y/N) leaned back in her chair as she awaited his answer along with everyone else on set, who was very entertained with the sarcastic couple.

"I'll hit your funny bone. Three times."

"You're adorable." The woman cooed at him while he grumpily pursed his lips. If she were closer, she would've already pinched his cheeks and dramatically rambled on about how cute, soft and innocent he was in front of the camera purposely.

"No, I don't think it does." She repeated his answer from earlier. It was Harry’s turn to roll his eyes. She threw her head back in laughter at his expression and shook her head.

"She's telling the truth." The operator spoke, snapping Harry out of his thoughts. He sent her a skeptical look, while she continued to laugh heavily.

He looked back down at his phone and continued on. "Do you find this man attractive?" Harry had attached a picture to his notes and set his phone flat on the table so the cameras could catch a glimpse of the photo.

It was a photo of Tom Holland at the premiere for his Spider-Man sequel, Spider-Man: Far From Home.

"Duh." She smiled cheekily, blood quickly rushing to her cheeks. Harry groaned as she grabbed his phone and zoomed in to get a better look at all his features. He could practically see her pupils dilate as she stared at the photo.

"Do you think he is more of a heartthrob than me?" She cringed, wondering how she should go about answering this question.

"Yes."

"That's true."

Harry’s jaw went slack. "What!" He shouted with wide eyes. She giggled and raised her hands innocently. "What? Tom Holland is one fine man. You can't get mad at me for that, I mean… look! at! him!" She handed him his phone, zoomed in on Tom's face.

Harry scoffed at her fangirl side coming out as he swallowed heavily.

"Would you leave me for Tom Holland?"

No. (Y/N) thought, holding back a laugh. She thought for a moment. "Yes. Absolutely. 100%. Definitely. No. Questions. Asked." She responded nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders and leaning back, still being mindful of all the equipment attached to her.

Harry looked down at the metal table and his jaw clenched. She could see his body physically tense as he waited for the polygraph operator to confirm or deny her answer.

"The machine jumped. She's lying."

Harry’s head shot up and he met his girlfriends gaze. She had a small smirk on her face and lifted her hands up to her face as she felt a blush creeping up to her cheeks.

Harry clenched his hands above his head and tilted his head back in his chair, letting out a small yell in triumph. He jumped our of his seat and sized up the camera, getting awfully close.

"You all heard that! I'm done! That's the last question, this couldn't have gone better." He dropped his phone and quickly made his way around the table, being careful not to trip on any wires or break the polygraph machine in any way.

He crouched down and wrapped his arms around her torso, burying his face into the crock of her neck because he couldn't stop his raging smile. "I knew it!"

She looked into the camera, still in her boyfriends embrace and gazed into the camera. She jokingly motioned a 'no' with her hands and mouthed 'Tom, call me', sending the camera a wink and bringing her right hand out with her pinky and thumb sticking out, making it look like a phone and bringing it up to her ear.

Harry felt her movement and looked up at her eyes. She quickly brought her hand to his shoulder and looked down at him as if nothing happened. He placed multiple tiny kisses all around her face, making her crinkle her nose and eyes.

He turned back to the camera for a spilt second. "You heard it here first, (Y/N) (Y/L/N) wouldn't leave me, Harry Styles for Tom Holland! Goodbye! Subscribe to Vanity Fair!" He saluted, still smiling uncontrollably as they both waved at the camera.

#request #afab reader #imagines #reader insert #famous!reader #harry styles x famous!reader #harry styles #harry styles imagine #vanity fair #harry styles x you #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #harry styles x fem!reader

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simsinlowspace · 7 months

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Garden Glory - 4t2 Base Game Wallpaper Conversion

Hey everyone! I have a quick wallpaper conversion to share with you today! Swatch, details, some ramblings and download below!

I'm in the process of moving all my stuff onto a much, much better computer. My files are flung near and far. I've also forgotten a lot of what I learned last year, so I need to relearn it. So I'm restarting kind of slow here.

Anyway, with the better computer I was finally able to install TS4 (if only for the purpose of ransacking it lol -- I'm still undecided if I'm going to do anything with the game itself), which brings us to today's download. These are the base game Garden Glory walls. They come in nine wallpaper colors and three panel colors, for a total of 27.

Numbering the swatch proved less than straightforward, so I'm including a texture download as well so you can compare file numbers and delete anything you don't want.

DOWNLOAD (SFS) | Walls are ~1.28MB DOWNLOAD TEXTURES (SFS) | .PNGs

If you've left a comment or sent a message, I just want to let you know that I am grateful and I apologize for not responding in a timely manner. This has been, hands-down, the craziest year of my life and I am mentally and emotionally fried. My communication skills are suffering as a result, and I just want you to know that I miss you too and I promise I will reply. The same goes for any unfulfilled requests -- I have not forgotten. <3

Lots of love, Spacey

@sims4t2bb

#4t2 #4t2 cc #ts2 download #ts2cc #s2cc #ts2 custom content #sims 2 custom content #s2 cc #ts2 #ts2 wall #4t2 conversion #the sims 2 cc #sims 2 download #ts2 walls

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liquorishblack · 1 year

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Inside the twisted mind of Hisoka Morow (part 2)

Relationship headcanon

Before you start reading, you should definitely check out part 1 , so you can understand my reasoning a little bit better.♡

Part 1 , Part 2

Synopsis: What a relationship with Hisoka Morow would look like, from sweet beginning to bitter end.

Genre: nsfw!, fluff, angst, headcanon, psychoanalysis, a little bit of everything

Reader: genderneutral

TW: nsfw!, mentions of: physical abuse, emotional abuse, manipulation, violence, murder, blood, sex, size kink, bdsm, praise, humiliation, cheating, trauma, mental illness ... basically everything, it's Hisoka after all

Wordcount: 5.066

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Part 1 already checked? Yes? Then let's get started...

Theoretical babble aside, now we´re getting on to the practice… so, what would a relationship with Hisoka Morow look like from sweet beginning to bitter end? Here we go…

Get to know him:

As for his prey pattern one might think that the only two things important to him are 1) at least one hole and 2) pulse. But that´s far from the truth! Hisoka has strong narcissistic traits, so it will be important for him to be able to decorate himself with his newest conquest, just like with an expensive accessory. So he´s quite superficial when it comes to picking his next target.

If you manage to attract his attention, it will be quite easy to „get to know“ him in a sense of „he only shows you of his what he wants you to see“, but you wouldn´t even be able to notice since he´s an outstanding liar and manipulator. For you, it will seem as if you are talking to an open-minded gentleman. If you fall into his pattern, he will - after observing you for a while - approach you in polite and friendly manner and open the conversation... probably with a pick up line that makes you cringe, laugh and blush at the same time. Since Hisoka is a sweet talker, he´ll have no difficulties to convince you, to go out with him, but there are occasions when wine and dine seems like a big waste of time to him. He has better stuff to do after all. In this case he´ll straight up ask you to hop under the sheets with him, cause he doesn´t feel shame either. If your answer is "no", he will, without deterioration, fly on to the next little flower and since he's a good looking gent, sooner or later this strategy will lead to success. But if he is bored anyway and looking for entertainment, you´re in for a date with a gentleman par excellence. The path of doors being held open, food at his expense, and a bunch of compliments is the most straightforward right into your pants, after all.

After a nice evening out he'll get down to business relatively quickly back at home - if you two even get there before he gets to the nitty gritty. He doesn´t shy away from PDA after all, since he is in fact completely shameless (neither has he empathy for you, nor for himself) and since he´s quite exhibitionistic, it might even turn him on.

When it comes to sex, it would be better, if you don't care about your physical integrity too much… since he has self control, he won´t hurt you seriously, but like I´ve mentioned before, this man needs strong stimuli to get *all excited*. But if you´re down for his messed up shenanigans, such as bdsm and bloodplay, you´ll enter an extatic world of domination and devotion, pleasure and pain, denial and overstimulation, humiliation and praise. And since promiscuity is quite a common trait of people who fall under the ASPD spectrum, he has plenty of experience and knows exactly what he´s doing and how to please you. For him sex is - besides the fun it is by itself - also a tool for boosting his ego. He just loves to see the impact his cock and his little tricks have on you and he will watch your facial expressions while fucking your brains out with great enthusiasm and pleasure. Only when you´re a total mess, he will allow himself to release and give you some rest. If he really likes you, you can expect at least some kind of aftercare, to make sure you´ll sleep with him again, just in case he decides wanting to do so. It´s an opportunity nice to have after all. If you´re just a random hookup, a towel is all you get… if you ask for it very nicely. He likes to see you suffer and he´s big on teasing and humiliating after all.

Dating-Phase:

Honestly, when it comes to relationships of any kind, casually hooking up is as uncomplicated as an interaction with Hisoka can get - as long as you can keep up with his kinks to say the least. You two meet, he´ll fuck you senseless and afterwards you both go separate ways as nothing ever happened. That's probably how most of his „relationships“ will go. They serve their purpose and are uncomplicated … just according to his taste.

But what if the thought of your sweaty skin against his, the sound of your greedy moans and the sensation of your nails, digging into his flesh, while you´re silky wet insides clench around his cock won´t leave his mind no matter what, even long after you´ve left?

Chances are high, that such a twist of events would happen with a s/o who is quite unaffectionate. See, Hisoka seems to like a good chase as he makes advances towards Machi over and over again and this would even match up with the theory I mentioned in part 1, that Hisoka was in fact a neglected child. When it comes to love relationships, it can be quite instructive to look at the earliest relationships we all had: Namely, those to our primary caregivers. Hisoka simps for a woman who doesn´t give a shit about him, because that´s probably the kind of „love“ he experienced at an early age. So chances are, that he has infact mommy- or daddy-issues, probably both. As Alain de Botton once said: „We don´t fall in love first and foremost with those who care for us in ideal ways, we fall in love with those who care for us in familiar ways“ (Adaption Level Theory). Furthermore people who shy away from intimacy, because it means making oneself vulnerable, tend to chase after individuals, whose affection is unattainable (such as Hisoka does with Machi), since there is no danger from a relationship that will never come about. In these cases psychology talks about different attachment-styles and attachment-disorders. But back to topic: It's very unusual for Hisoka to have his bed-bunnies still haunting his mind after he have had his fun, so this keeps him guessing…

Probably out of curiosity and ambition to get what he wants, since he´s an opportunist and at this stage might not think about the consequences (like he could fall in love, common, this is ridiculous), he´ll reach out to you again and observe… observe what it is, that you do to him and how he reacts to it, how it makes him feel, just to wrap his head around what is happening. His search for an answer can already take on obsessive traits, because in such an unfamiliar situation Hisoka is confronted with the old familiar feeling of loss of control once again. His ambition will be to regain control, but this endeavor will automatically lead to a conflict of interests: he has a crush on you, he wants to spent time with you, hold you and be near you, just as anyone would, when you grew quite fond of someone. But at the same time his danger-radar screams at the top of it´s lungs „JUST THE FUCK LEAVE, MAN“!, which he actually will do! Over and over again.

In this early phase he will disappear on you often… ghost you for days, weeks, even months. And this, my friend, believe me, will get you hooked. Those push & pull or hot & cold tactics are even used by those dubious dating coaches and you know what? THEY WORK! The culprit in this case is in fact the dopaminergic system. Since we are human beings and therefore social creatures, attention makes us happy - especially if it´s given to us by a good-looking jester. But the moment Hisoka disappears on you, without any shitty excuse even, you´re lacking your daily dose of dopamine, which in fact can lead to withdrawal-like phenomena on a psychological level. Even if you were not so much into him from the beginning, now you´ll be craving your next hit like a junky in rehab. You´ll question yourself, why he got blank on you so sudden… did you do something wrong? Did he find someone better than you? Does he do this to you on purpose? Even a certain sense of ambition can be triggered by this whimsical behavior. With everything you do, you´ll try desperately, to get his attention back, just to get your ego at ease.

So, this bastard got you hooked, not even because this was his intention in first place (not that he would mind either), but because of his own insecurity, which he would never ever show to you, since it´s an admission of weakness and this would give you power over him. Power, he doesn´t want you to have, since he doesn´t trust anyone. You on the other hand will notice anything of that said insecurity. All you see is a fuckboy, who goes blanc on you and uses you like a toy. Your meetings are of fire and passion, while the dead end silence in between will evoke an excruciating sense of longing. Not so much for him, since he doesn´t have great access to his emotion, but you, my dear, are fucked at this point. And so it goes on for a while…

Feelings arise:

We value things, that make our everyday life easier and keep boredom at bay. If you manage to entertain Hisoka to a sufficient degree, he might decide to keep you. Spending time with you, feels always nice - no matter if you´re out on the streets, visiting an amusement park or just chilling on the couch. You have a great sense of dark humor that makes him laugh and he´s somewhat impressed by your high intellect. Sometimes he just sits their, watching you scrolling through your phone, admiring your beauty and wondering, what’s on your mind. Although he's good at reading people, you seem to be somewhat unconventional in your way of thinking - unpredictable even. You don't exactly make it easy for him to see right through you, but that´s what makes you so interesting to him. You are a challenge, which he doesn´t stumble upon often. And you give him sass! You´re not afraid of talking back and speak for yourself, traits he always appreciates. Your attitude somewhat humors him. Somehow Hisoka enjoys the danger radiating from your innocent face (again: Your behavior gives him a sense of insecurity, never knowing where he stands with you - a feeling he is familiar with from childhood days).

Also the genuine acts of affection and kindness you show towards him, will leave him wondering: He isn´t used to being taken care of. Most people avoid him, so every time you snug up to him for a hug or say something nice to him (and he can sense that you mean it) it leaves him somewhat pleasantly surprised.

You help him to fill the void inside of him, an ever-bleeding wound, that tears open again, as soon as you are not near him and he´s confronted with his inner emptiness again. This comforting feeling you give him, he no longer wants to miss and so it happens, that he develops some sense of care for you. He wants you to be happy, because when you´re in a good mood, you are most entertaining to him. He wants you to be safe, so many more shared nights are guaranteed.

You might have noticed a slightly egoistic tinge to these motifs… this is, because they are. This is what Hisokas „love“ will be like. Don´t get me wrong, he will do everything to make you happy and more. He will help you become the best version of yourself you can be and he´s the wind beneath your wings, there is no doubt about that. But Hisokas love will always be conditionally.

(If love is ever unconditional - mother love aside - is a topic for itself, I personally don´t think so and therefore wouldn´t mind, but anyway).

In this phase he might consider to disappear on you and this time it would be final, but that would mean losing you, even risking, that you would move on easily and he can´t have that. So he stays.

Hisoka would never ever be verbal about his feelings at an so early stage. He´ll show his affection for you with, of course, physical touch (believe me, you guys will always have physical contact in some way or another), gifts and quality time - acts of services not so much, but occasions might occur.

If he happens to really fall in love with you (not crushing on you like before, I mean truthful deep feelings), this is when things can potentially get dangerous. When stronger feelings arise, it means that Hisoka has lost control and as said before, he can´t have that. He will consider leaving you once again, but feelings are stronger than ratio at times, so again, he stays.

Now remember why Hisoka doesn´t like the feeling of losing control in the first place: because it makes him vulnerable. It puts him into a position, he isn´t used to. You have the power to hurt him now, not physically (let´s be honest here, he wouldn´t mind that anyway, it would even turn him on), but emotionally, which is were his real weakness lies. As he´s afraid that you could abuse your power and actually hurt him, he will do everything he can, to avoid that from happening. Since he´s quite overwhelmed by this unfamiliar experience, cause he isn´t used to having someone he cares about, expect whimsical and impulsive behavior - but to an extent that goes far beyond what you are already used to from him by now. Just multiply those hisokaesque-traits with 10. His antics will align with his emotional state and therefore become even more unpredictable and uncontrollable.

At times he might try to push you away, maybe by being nasty and saying such hurtful things, that make you consider leaving and never coming back. Without doing it on purpose, you´ll probably touch old wounds of him and make them bleed again. That´s just how relationships are… people who share a great deal of emotional intimacy, trigger and hurt each other from time to time, which in itself is not a big deal, if it weren´t for Hisoka we´re talking about.

Sometimes he might even hate you for making him fall in love with you. For making him feel weak and therefore turning his world upside down, which he absolutely hates at times. If he´s feeling unsure about the relationship or - even worse - about your feelings towards him (not because of you doing something wrong, it can be external circumstances as well), this will throw him off.

Giving him the cold shoulder, like you did in the dating phase, is only good as long he hasn´t invested much, but when feelings come up, that's a big no-no. Jealousy might be a problem as well and yet again, since it´s Hisoka we´re talking about, this might go hand in hand with stalking, obsessive and even possessive behavior, since he can´t find the ability to trust in himself.

It will be your task to show and teach him, how to trust and to convince him, that you can be trusted and for that I hope you have the patience of a saint. Even though from the outside Hisoka seems quite self-confident, remember that this might be a mask. This man has definitely an inflated ego, which is often based on feelings of inferiority. As he has narcissistic traits, he´s highly dependent on external confirmation. The chasing phase is over, so now he wants to be treated. You better look up to him and show him your love and respect as much as you can. Praise him, make sure that he knows that you´re feelings are genuine. Make him feel safe in your arms. Hold him, don´t push him away, even if he can be clingy and a bit much at times.

At that early stage he needs to be your No.1 priority. Don´t dare to ignore him or hurt his ego. Don´t lie to him. This man will notice immediately and get back at you tenfold and he does not shy away from acting up, just to get your attention back, that´s sure as hell. Nothing feels worse to him then not being seen and feeling neglected, since this triggers his childhood trauma. Also, if he gets a reaction out you, that must mean, that you do still care about him, doesn´t it? The bigger your reaction, the better. In this early stage of you´re relationship it is most likely you, who gives the biggest investment, since out of the fear of being hurt, he´s still holding back. But if you´re able to deal with his antics for a distant span of time, this might change. In this early stage he feels best, when you are around him (where he can see and control you, making sure that you don´t dare to act irresponsible with the heart of his in your hands) and therefore he´ll try to have you near him as much as possible.

On a more positive note, I don´t see Hisoka as a physically violent man, unless you ask him nicely about it. He will push boundaries, that´s fore sure, but never to such an extend, that´ll make you leave, since that´s quite the opposite of what he wants. He wants to convince you of what he already knows: namely, that he is the best you´ll ever have. Hisoka is a passionate and sensual man after all, so you´re in for treatment as it would be worthy of a queen/king. Flowers, exciting dates, romantic dinners (hell, he would even cook for you), lots of childish shenanigans like dancing through the sleeping streets and pillow fights after hot and sweaty hours under the sheets. As trust growths, you´ll see more of his soft side and you´ll be surprised how gentle Hisoka can be during intimate hours. He´ll praise you as well, since he wants you to feel good around him. Many many compliments, passionate kisses all over your body, especially on your neck (he´ll definitely mark you as his property), soft caresses and cuddles on end, just holding you close to him for hours. Just for you. Just to make you happy. Just to make you his. At this time he´s more than willing to let troupe duties and even fights in heavens arena slide, just for a lovely and cozy night in, cuddling, giggling and playing cards with you.

Established Relationship:

If he would ever officially propose in case of verbalizing, that you two are in fact in a relationship, is questionable, but his wall is getting cracks already and therefore you´ll get to know his real self more and more over time. He´s no longer the outgoing jokester who teases you all the time (ok, lets be honest here, he´ll stiIl tease you every now and then, he always will, because that´s how he is), but you´ll see a more introverted side of his, which comes along with a certain softness. More often he´s more quiet than loud and he´ll just listen to you for hours, while his bedroomed gaze rests on you attentively. You got his full attention as well as his heart. He cares about you, so he is interested in what you have to say.

But the longer you guys are in a relationship, the bigger of a challenge it will be, not to bore him. He´s volatile after all and it´s highly possible that he nostalgically remembers his times as a lone wolf sometimes.

If bored, he might start arguments out of the blue, just to make things more exciting… and fighting with Hisoka is very unpleasant to say the least. He is bratty, arrogant, petty and has a hard time apologizing. He will only do so, if he wants something from you. He´ll gaslight and manipulate the shit out of you, just for you to feel sorry in the end, doesn´t matter, if you did something wrong or not. In addition your guilt will get him lots of make up sex and sloppy heads afterwards, which is always nice to have. However, these are just squabbles we are talking about… a real argument will look extremely different.

Hisoka has the patience of a saint and nothing makes him fly off the handle so easily (which is quite unusual for people who suffer ASPD tbh). But one thing that will push him over the edge is you being reckless with your own physical well-being… or you flirting with Chrollo, which threatens his ego, cause this man might even be stronger and therefore more impressive to you than Hisoka himself (which he will obviously never ever admit, so he would find some other shitty reasons to justify his anger). When Hisoka snaps, bloodlust oozes from him and the possibility exists that he´ll put you into your place with harsh words spoken in a stern voice, maybe even screaming at you, which might scare you, since he´s quite intimidating in this emotional state. He does this, because by putting yourself in danger, you are endangering himself, too. He doesn´t want to lose you because of some unnecessary incident that could´ve been avoided easily after all, so he´s quite protective when it comes to you.

Also frustration might push him over the edge. He´s not used to not getting what he wants and has his difficulties with terms like „no“. Since he respects you, he won´t cross any major lines, but he´ll push your boundaries and manipulate you into giving him, what he wants. Let's call it psychological warfare. If you somehow manage to hurt his feelings, he´ll go cold on you, pout and even ignore you for hours, days or weeks, depending of how much he´s hurting. Not because he´s so resentful, but because he wants you to feel sorry for what you´ve done to him. When he´s ready to talk to you again, you´ll have to apologize in very very sweet tounges to get back into his good grace.

So, to keep boredom and unnecessary quarrels at bay, it is important that you both find ways to spice things up a little. Now that he has a certain sense of security when it comes to you, you should also lead a more self-determined life again, at least to a certain degree. Don´t be to needy. Don´t run after him. Give him his space and try to find the trust that he´ll come back to you... even though there will never be a guarantee that he does. But give him the chance to miss you, to be longing for your touch, as he´s on his missions and you are mining your own business.

Also you´ll need a high libido to keep up with his insatiable needs, not just during the honeymoon phase, also beyond. Otherwise you´re taking the risk, that he goes elsewhere to get what he needs. I don´t think that Hisoka is big in monogamy when your relationship has been going on for a while… at least when it comes to him. And that´s a problem: He might look after other (wo)men or even consider „cheating“ on you (unless you aren´t fine with an open relationship), but I think his ego might get in the way, when you express the desire to sleep with other (wo)men as well, which is quite unfair, but that´s how he ticks. Maybe consider visiting swingerclubs or participating in threesomes every now and then, as a compromise. It is important, however, that you only get your appetite elsewhere, but always always always eat at home! Don´t deflate this mans ego. This would be a thing you might regret later. If he catches you cheating, he´ll be furious and I don't know how you could, or if you ever could, make up for that. He will definitely kill the person you cheated on him with and I think this could be one of the rare occasions, where he might turn even violent against you. Just to make sure that you´ll never ever dare to do this again. If he decides to keep you despite the cheating, he will treat you like a good-for-nothing slave for the next few weeks, just to make you suffer and get back at you. As for building trust on his side, you can start from 0 again at this point, as you can imagine. Also I should mention, that if Hisoka ever cheats on you, that doesn´t mean that he does not love you. Sex and feelings are two completely different things to him. Therefore his anger in case of you cheating, isn´t based on severe heartbreak, it´s in fact his ego, that is hurting. As if he's not enough and all you need.

I´ve talked about Hisoka pushing boundaries before, but just to make clear what could come along with it: There might be occasions when he comes home after one of his fights, emotionally still heavily loaded and in the mood to celebrate his success, aka break someone. This energy needs to go somewhere and since you´re sleeping right over there so peacefully, you´re the perfect target. He will take what he craves and just destroy you in the most pleasant way possible.

So he comes home in the middle of the night, highly aroused, and will wake you up by indulging your crotch with fiery kisses, bloodlust dripping from his tongue, and greedy blood stained touches. He´ll bend you over and start thrusting into you merciless, without giving you the chance to come to your senses first. All you feel is his hard pulsating cock stretching your insides, his tight grip around your waist, sharp nails digging into your flesh and the cold blood of his enemies dripping onto your hot skin.

These are occasions when sex feels best to him. Every single thrust inside your clenching walls sends shocks right through his body, making him feel more and more extatic with every second. He is completely in charge, not just over you, but also over his opponent, who is most likely already dead by this time. His orgasms are intense in this state of mind and he´ll sure as hell not be satisfied by filling you up just once. After he has absolutely destroyed your downstairs, he´s finally satisfied and will just lay there, with you on his chest, admiring of how much a mess his cock made you become, and enjoy the soothing calmness that floods his body instead of bloodlust. He´ll listen to your soft and exhausted snores until he falls in a deep and dreamless sleep, just like you did, the moment he pulled out of you.

And that is what I mean when saying, he´ll push boundaries. The longer the two of you are together and the more secure you make him feel, the less he needs to fear that you´ll leave by the moment, he shows his real self to you. For the first time in his life he feels accepted as he is… loved even. You stayed. No matter how much of his deviant personality traits he had shown to you and despite the many times he pushed you away. And therefore he´ll be forever grateful.

Breakup:

Is „forever“ even a possibility with Hisoka? I´m not sure about that, to be honest. That would require that you both grow together, to support each other in the fight against the inner demons that I'm sure you both have, otherwise you wouldn't have played along with his games for so long. So always remember: „I´ll admit, I have my issues, but you are just as bad“. Even if the possibility exists, I find it hard to imagine that Hisoka would attend trauma-therapy and engage in inner child work. In addition to that, it would take him years, to put down his mask to such an extend, that he´ll open up about his past, if it ever happens. Also, even if he does, this could cause an initial deterioration of his condition, which could have disastrous consequences. For both of you. Therefore, some things might better stay untouched, otherwise they might break you.

Also, I don´t think that the chances of a consensual break up, without any drama or heartbreak, are very high. What ever the reasons might be, if Hisoka is the one being hurt, he might decide to kill you. Not because of hatred (unless you have treated him tremendously wrong), but because of safety reasons and therefore it´ll still hurt him like a bitch. It would be a scene as tragic as from a love drama. He would hold your lifeless bleeding body until it gets cold, kiss your soft lips as your last breath leaves your lungs and gently close those your/eyecolor eyes, he lost himself in so many times. He might even shed a solitary tear. Whatever happened between the two of you, you showed him, what love is, and therefore he´ll never forget you. But it just had to be. In the end, you two didn´t work and you just know too much, to keep wandering this planet. He has many enemies after all and with your connection, the trust in you, that you won´t use your power against him one day, is broken. Depending on the circumstances, he might decide to never love again.

༻✦༺

♠ „Farewell, my dear. Too bad, it didn´t work out. We just weren´t meant to be… and still, you´re the only one, I´ve ever loved and therefore I´ll never forget you.“, he says, plenting a last heartfelt kiss on your forehead, before he leaves. ♠

༻✦༺

The End.

TYSM for reading!🫶🏻 You made it till the end, so you deserve a flower.❀ If you enjoyed my writing, feel free to send me requests, I'm always grateful for some inspiration. - Yours truly, Ava 🤍

#hisoka morow #hisoka #hisoka angst #hisoka fluff #hisoka headcanon #hisoka x reader #hisoka smut #huner x hunter

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dropthedemiurge · 5 days

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Some language comments for Gray Shelter [Episode 5], just like I promised!

"Do whatever/however you want to. (literally: 'Do it the way your heart desires') You do things how you want to anyway."

"I'm sorry" - the translation is correct, it's just it's funny how Yoondae's level of apology to his friend he just lashed out at last time + he wants to ask him for HELP, and all he says is: 미안 (mian). The most informal and short way of apologizing possible. He's so teenager-minded still.

Even when he asks "Can I leave my stuff in your dad's warehouse?" it comes out grammatically more of a demand, like 'Let me do that'. Yoondae is talking like someone who has a lot of walls and doesn't reach out to people, he doesn't talk kindly but he's honest and straightforward and he cries easily but he's very angry about it.

I especially love his facial expression, even when he's at his most miserable, he'll make it everyone else's problem, as if being pitiful is the worst thing that could happen to him. "I have no one else I could ask for help but you >:(("

Fun fact about Korean's sentence structure, when you quote someone or express your thoughts, you put your sentence this way: "quoted phrase" and then + "that's what they said/what i thought/etc". So oftentimes, I see Kdramas use that trick when characters say a phrase... and then take it back with "that's someone else's thoughts" or "that's what you thought I'd say, right? LMAO". It's funny how the translators' way of transferring this was using the word "Sike!" xD

"It wasn't a mistake to me." "If it wasn't a mistake, then [what]? Since you started talking [about it], let me ask you. So what if it wasn't a mistake? What do you want to achieve with me?" "Can I do anything about it? In the past or now, you're the one who runs away and avoids me. I asked you, can I make a decision (do I have any choices)?" "You made the move but you want me to decide? Fine, then. Let sleep together once and end it once and for all. Go wash up first. I don't have time, I only left office for a short time."

The way they both care about each other but their dialogues and words are very sharp and bitter almost all the time, especially here, aaaah. That's the contrast that hooked me for all these 5 episodes. Soohyuk doesn't swear but he's talking to Yoondae very harshly and emotionless here, and for Yoondae harsh talk is the default, it's like Soohyuk is lowering his manners to talk on his level, to provoke him (or maybe that's also how he distances himself from the discovery that Yoondae has feelings for him).

And Yoondae is holding back his frustration and tears, but he understands the way such words were aimed to hurt him, so instead of lashing out back at Soohyuk, as he probably wants him to, he swallows and unusually calmly, almost softly says: "Let's talk when you can be honest. Because I will shut up and wait for you."

And it makes Soohyuk stand there in shock and contemplate.

I'll add next scenes in READ MORE since this post is getting long!

Here's the moment when the boss asks their youngest employee to write something more 'trendy' for their marketing text xD It's very true that trends in Korea come and go very quickly, they also love to invent new terms and phrases all the time. Like "MZ slang", there are many phrases, and the one trendy phrase the boss uses as the example is 킹받네 (king-pad-nae) which literally written as 'receive the king' but means "I got angry" - but with a teasing/playful subtext, like friends could say each other 'ah you're so cute, it makes me angry'.

If I'm not wrong, this phrase was widely used like 1-2 years ago and not really in its trendy peak as well right now but kudos to boss to even learning it xD And it's funny how translator chose to (I assume) use "[living in my head] rent-free" phrase as a substitute. Another fun fact, they ended up using some trendy lingo in their ad that translator gave us as "no cap!" but that part of phone msg was so blurry, I couldn't see which exact Korean phrase they ended up using x)

"Hyung, if you have any ask for help, say so. For you, 2 million... No, I'll try to give you until 3 million won in any way."

Can I just say that we had this character for one moment and I'm so not ready to let him go, I want Jeongwan to have his own storyline and everything and he's too sweet and also caring for strangers/his colleagues, and so he stole the spotlight for me xD

Yoondae said there's no food at home. But also, as you can see, there is: beer, water, rice that you can cook in the microwave, kimchi for a side dish and some other microwaved food. According to my Korean friends, typical Korean person (poor like student) can survive if they have rice, kimchi and also ramyeon. That's their the most basic food. Just a fun fact. xD

Also he was on his third can of beer, and he already made a drunken longing call on the verge of tears to Soohyuk, lying about being hurt and bringing trouble just so he'd return home. "Is that okay with you?" - just shoot me, please. :')

"I called [the cleaning service/you] to tell you to stop it [sleeping outside of home]" "Let's have that dinner [that I promised you] today. Wait for me."

After days, Yoondae was ready to give up, he "tricked" Soohyuk to return home just so he could tell him he'll move out and stop pushing any talk. And then, Soohyuk brought up the dinner (the feelings) that he kept avoiding. No wonder Yoondae looked so struck and confused. It just gave him his hopes back (and viewers too, but we probably should've known better with this kind of series haha)

Interesting cultural context: they are getting samgyeopsal - grilled meat, chosen by Soohyuk because Yoongdae said there wasn't anything he wanted to eat. And usually, the youngest one has to set the cutlery and grill meat, out of respect for the seniors. And here we see that Soohyuk is the one choosing the place, menu and even grilling the meat and pouring soju for Yoondae.

Once again, it shows that despite Yoondae's emotions and pleads, he is not mature enough, he is not ready to focus on other people. We know he can't plan his own future, he doesn't know what to do, and we see where their relationship stands now - Yoondae is still more of a burden than an equal partner to Soohyuk, and Soohyuk is more of a parent.

Even when they drink soju (in Korean drinking etiquette usually you don't drink alone, you toast together and drink together), notice how they don't even clink their glasses together, then Soohyuk is the only one drinking and Yoondae wants to follow him but puts the glass back. He's taking a shot later, when Soohyuk grills the meat again. They are totally unsynchronized at this point of their lives, and it's painful to watch.

"I said he [my father] was dead because that's the truth/reality for me. There was no other [hidden] meaning. I didn't plan to lie to you."

"I moved out completely. If I don't organize my life starting from doing this, then I don't think I'll be able to live like all the other [normal] people."

The fact that Yoondae started thinking about improving his life (the word 'organizing'), immediately made Soohyuk stop in surprise. So he started asking what does the normal life like others mean to him, hopeful to find that equal adult footing from Yoondae... but Yoondae's thoughts stopped there. And Soohyuk offered his own goal and life meaning: "to have a place to go back to, that's enough for me".

Here's when Yoondae thoughtfully agreed with him: "It's important to have a home", and took the meat tongs from Soohyuk, saying how high-maintenance he is. Yoondae embraced that realization, he took the responsibility (even a small cultural gesture) and even though Yoondae nagged him, Soohyuk smirked. Because it wasn't a completely hopeless situation. And Yoondae proved it, by saying how eating like this and going home together is his normal life as well. (and yet they were still unsynchronized until the very end! we can't have happy ending yet)

AND HERE IS WHERE I HAVE TO MAKE A SECOND POST! Because tumblr only allows 30 images in one, and I can't stop screenshotting the last conversation so I'm going to make another post that you can find in 'gray shelter comments' or 'dropthemeta' tags (upd. or here's the link to the post!)^^

#gray shelter comments #gray shelter #gray current #dropthemeta #kbl #korean bl #kactors #grey shelter #bl series #soohyuk x yoondae #language details #language #korean language #korea #korean culture #things you didn't notice

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mecachrome · 4 months

Note

your oscar primer was absolutely brilliant, thank you so much for posting it!! well-researched, well-written, and a good balance of educational and hilarious. if you want to share, i’d be very interested in reading any of the parts you mentioned that you cut out, like george-admiring, oscar’s psyche, etc, but no pressure ofc 🫶

omg no thank you so much for your kind words, i appreciate it a lot!!! :D andddd let me see... honestly i was just going to add a few more quotes & anecdotes from other people about his personality but i ended up incorporating most of them into the primer (e.g. mark's), but in general i think it's really charming how Every Single Adult who has ever worked with oscar throughout the years is so deeply and immediately convinced of his maturity. i did work in most of this old ask but it has a few extra quotes in there from mclaren personnel! anyway more below the cut:

i guess really the thing to Me about oscar is like...... idk if this makes any sense but i personally love how he's naturally a really gracious and diplomatic person but is also deeeeeply self-assured and objective, which on one hand means he presents as quite humble when he doesn't make excuses for himself or get caught up in deceptively high results, but on the other also means he refuses to give anyone else credit for his own success; if you remember me briefly mentioning prematax in that post he talks about it in the f1fs pod where he basically goes i didn't win because of PREMA, in fact i've NEVER LOST TO A TEAMMATE, SO. like any racing driver that is def a big source of pride for him, and i think it speaks to the "silent killer" (per lando) side to him, the guy who mark says "falls asleep" when hearing stories of his (championless) career, who said that he supported mark out of national obligation growing up but—let us not forget—vettel was the one winning everything back then anyway, who says he put even more pressure on himself to win his final race in f2 despite having clinched the title 2 races prior because he felt the innate urge to prove that he wouldn't simply ease off the gas pedal and still had it in himself to subjugate the field one last time.

along these lines oomf and i have discussed before how he and alex rank similarly on the kind/nice dichotomy in a way that is slightly diametric to lando, wherein he is always willing to offer tidy bits of sympathy for someone else's struggles but doesn't ever really envision any of them as relevant to his own experiences, because getting caught up in that "external noise" would be a waste of time (even with logan in the f3 finale it was honestly kind of like "aw man that sucks, i'd hate for it to be me... ANYWAY"). like not to maybe exaggerate his interiority but i enjoy that he carries an amount of hidden tension that he obviously consciously decides to not take reactionary measures over—though that doesn't mean it isn't there, it's just very well regulated (unrelated but he does actually work with mental coach emma murray, who also works with scott mclaughlin and whom he says helped him center himself at the end of his eurocup season). but he's still very... unfiltered about when he's been disrespected in an unperturbed, straightforward manner, like saying otmar confronting him on the sim over being promoted to the seat was "bizarre and frankly upsetting," the face he made when he was told they'd overtaken alpine in the standings in 2023, telling the kids in that hp tuners interview that the renault engineers treated his first f1 test too nonchalantly, etc. 😭 like every interview back when he was a reserve driver was soooo "i'm gracious about being stuck in this role but also i've proven myself way too much to Not Hate This Compromise and i'll be pissed as hell if i don't get a seat next year"... i'll stop here but basically he is truly a master of balancing gritted-teeth conviction with his tactical charm and it is one of my fav things ever about him!!!

also another quote i love is this one from david sera about his driving style, because 1) i love the correlation between it and his personality/calmness, 2) i'm obsessed with the dynamic of his early rc days helping nurture a style of "finesse" in his driving throughout his junior career that may not have appeared naturally if he'd only begun racing in karting (and subsequently how he had to learn to not get "muscled around" after moving to europe), and 3) of course as a noted jb22 appreciator i love when people note similarities in his inputs to jb because it is delicious to ME:

Coming from a remote control car background where concentration, finesse and smooth inputs, these were the traits we saw in Oscar in the cadet category. [...] You would often see other drivers have an advantage in the early part of the race, driving more aggressively, but Oscar had a more calm approach.

c__c but back to the first part of the ask and our good friend russell jorge, i'm mostly obsessed with oscar's reactions to his performance at the rollercoaster that was spa 2021 and the fact that he's been so vocally appreciate of george "outperforming" the car he was in. the 2 instances of the word HERO on his twitter:

and then this quote in an interview he did in 2022:

"[Success] is definitely not just defined by just world championships, and if you can outperform the car that you're in—I think George Russell has been a very fine example of that in years previous, you know, constantly getting the most out of that Williams and of course Spa. (laughs) Bit controversial, but he got a podium at the end of the day! And even without that, he qualified second, he outqualified everyone except Max in a Williams, which, you know, is an unbelievable result."

also george being the only f1 driver (i think) to tweet him for his f2 title :saluting_face:

AND ALSO THEM SHARING THE ANECDOTE OF THEIR AWKWARD FIRST MEETING ON THE FAST & CURIOUS POD??? aka oscar was told in his april 2023 ep that they were going to interview george next and he was like oh ok you can ask him about our "slightly left-field introduction," and then they had george on who was like oh yeah i met oscar for the first time washing our hands together in the bathroom on our way to the ausgp in 2020 😭 what a way to meet.

#ask #SORRY FOR THIS WORD SALAD...

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drewexe · 2 years

Text

Like The Stars Pt. 1

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4

Pairing: jaemin x fem!reader

Genre: smut, fluff, sex lessons au, friends to lovers

Word Count: ~8,8k

Includes: high school seniors (everyone is legal of age); canon bisexual mc; side characters donghyuck, renjun, and karina; profanities; obviously, sex lessons; kind of a slow burn?; mc being oblivious and kind of innocent but hopefully not in an annoying way; one handjob (for now)

Summary: you'd had a crush on renjun for as long as you could remember, but your lack of experience always stopped you from taking the first step; it's a good thing you have your trusted friend jaemin to help you out

Author's note: fun fact about this story, i've been writing it ever since ridin came out... i edited it a bit to make that less obvious, but i apologize for any writing inconsistencies that may appear, as there is only so much i can change without rewriting the full thing also if you see any mentions of hair colors, no you didn't also i meant to post this as one part but i wasn't able to finish it by the day i wanted to post it so imma stop procrastinating and finish it on the go hehe

It was something like an unwritten rule that rich kids would go to private schools, at least where you lived, which could also be heavily influenced by the fact that one of the best private schools in the country was located in your town. Of course, coming from a family of successful businessmen, you had been enrolled the moment your family stepped foot there three years ago. About 95% of the students were filthy rich, the remaining 5% being scholarship kids that you didn’t really communicate with much. Well, truth be told, you only really communicated with four people in the school but in all honesty, you enjoyed your school life.

You walked into the school cafeteria and headed over to the table where your best friend Karina was already enjoying her lunch. Across from her was sitting Donghyuck, another one of your friends. Karina and Hyuck had a long story back, both of them teasing each other all the time, never actually getting together yet for some reason. You had given up trying to help them. You had enough to worry about with your own secret crush anyway.

“The school year started two weeks ago, how come I already have three different assignments,” you complained instead of a greeting once you sat down at the table.

“Senior year, Y/N, we all knew that was coming,” Hyuck shrugged, grinning slightly with an astonishing lack of empathy.

You just rolled your eyes, not bothering to respond. You took a bite out of your lunch but got distracted as soon as two familiar figures entered the cafeteria. The other two in your small group – Na Jaemin and Huang Renjun. Your eyes quickly stopped on the Chinese boy and you couldn't help but let out a quiet sigh.

“Y/N, dear, can you please tell him finally?” Karina rolled her eyes next to you, leaning closer and lowering her voice so Hyuck wouldn't listen in. “You’ve had a crush on Renjun for as long as I’ve known you, you should just go for it.”

You shook your head quickly, opening your mouth to say something in objection but then the two boys had already reached the table. You closed your mouth again and waved at them with a smile.

“Hello there,” Jaemin greeted, grinning slightly as he sat on the table next to you. Like, literally on the table, his feet stepping on the bench. You looked up at him, eyebrows raised in just a slightly judging manner.

“Hey, kiddo,” you smiled back, reaching up to ruffle his hair.

Yet your smile melted as Renjun suddenly sat down next to you, greeting you with a soft “Hello, beautiful” of his own and throwing his arm over your shoulder. You greeted back softly, enjoying the feeling of his body near yours.

Renjun confused you a lot of the time - he seemed open to you, he flirted and complimented you a lot, but he’d never really addressed any feelings and you knew him as a straightforward guy that wouldn’t just keep quiet if he wanted something. Which is why you were scared to ask him yourself. That, and your lack of experience. Well, you weren’t innocent and pure, you had dated and had sex before, but it had been with girls. Men were a confusing thing to you, you weren't sure what to do with those and feared messing up, as dumb as that was. But you just didn’t want to mess up with Renjun.

“People, I am planning on organizing a back-to-school party this year,” Jaemin said, pulling you away from your thoughts.

“Are parties all you think about?” Renjun tsked in disapproval on your left, making you chuckle. “You’re legally an adult already, Nana, you can’t always just have fun.”

“So, who wants to host it?” Jaemin ignored him, a grin spreading on his lips. “My parents are home tonight so it can’t be at my place. Hyuckie?” Donghyuck shook his head with a roll of his eyes.

“Don’t look at me,” he whined. “Last time I let you have a party at my place, I had to find my precious Michael Jackson albums in the bottom of the laundry basket, under at least three shirts that weren’t mine!”

The grin on Jaemin’s lips didn’t fall, instead, he just seemed pleased with the mentioned outcome.

“My parents aren’t home, actually,” you mentioned, chuckling slightly. “And you’re in luck, I actually feel like dealing with one of your parties, Jaem,” you said, smiling at the boy that immediately turned to you, a happy glow in his eyes that melted you a bit on the inside.

“Great then, I’ll go invite everyone important!” he jumped up, already taking out his phone and ignoring Renjun’s eye roll and disappointed sigh.

“Y/N, you should finish your lunch,” Renjun said to you, smiling sweetly. “If you’ll be dealing with him all night, you’ll need all your energy.” You nodded slightly as you took a big bite of your meal, eyes shining from the approval on Renjun’s face.

You failed to notice Jaemin’s mood faltering and the way his smile dropped as he left the cafeteria. And when you realized he had left, you just shrugged, assuming it was just to talk to his friends about the party.

The school day passed by quickly, and soon you found yourself at home getting everything ready for the party. The home staff had helped you stock up enough alcohol and snacks for as many people as you could, not really sure who Jaemin would even have invited. You hoped it wouldn’t be the whole school, which he had done once in Renjun’s house. You were relieved to see not that many people arriving. I mean, of course, it was a pretty big party, but you could handle this much and still have a house by the next day.

The night was going well, everyone seemed to be having fun, a lot of the kids were already getting drunk, and you were pretty sure at least one of the guest rooms was taken up, but you were happy. And maybe a little tipsy yourself.

“Y/N, baby, come play with us,” you heard your best friend’s voice call out to you and turned around with a smile, seeing Karina, the three boys, and some other kids. You approached curiously, taking a sip from your glass filled with vodka and cranberry juice.

“What are we playing?” you asked, tilting your head to the side.

“Truth or dare,” Hyuck answered instead, grinning. You took notice of the boy sitting a lot closer to Karina than usual, which made you raise your eyebrows and a smirk curve your lips, throwing the other girl an amused glance to which she replied with a wink.

“I’m in,” you giggled, sitting down in the free spot next to Renjun and across from Jaemin. They had already started playing and apparently, one of the girls had to sit in another guy’s lap, which he seemed to enjoy a lot more than her. The same boy spun the bottle and it landed on you, another giggle escaping you. Okay, maybe you were more than just a little tipsy.

“Uh, if you had to date someone from the group, who would it be?” the boy asked awkwardly, which you gave to the fact that you didn’t really know each other.

“Easy, Karina” you grinned, laughing a bit after that, though judging by his expression he expected the answer to be a boy. “But if you insist it has to be with a dick, then I’d say Renjun,” you added, your mind cloudy enough to not overthink it. Renjun laughed amused, leaning over to peck your cheek, and if anyone could know that you were suddenly feeling warmer, you'd blame it on the alcohol.

As the game goes, it was your turn to spin the bottle and so you did, landing on a girl from the class below yours. You knew her very vaguely yet made up some dumb dare that the girl still ended up enjoying. A few more rounds went by and the bottle fell on Jaemin, who picked dare almost the same second.

“Kiss the person across from you,” whoever had spun said.

It took you a moment to realize that was you. You blinked, looking up and your eyes met. Unlike the confident expression you could see on his face usually, Jaemin looked unsure, you could see a question in his eyes. “I can drink if you don’t-“ he started, but you shook your head.

“Na Jaemin doesn’t step down from dares,” you declared, giggling and taking a sip from your drink again. “I ain’t gonna be the reason you change that.” With that you got up on your knees, leaning over the bottle closer to him.

You could see him still hesitating, which made you narrow your eyebrows slightly and pout. “If you don’t want to, though…“ you started, your tone a bit upset in your drunken haze, which seemed to snap him out of his anxiousness and he moved up, closer to you. His hand reached up, cupping your cheek gently.

“Any preferences on the kiss?” he asked suddenly, you weren't sure if he was asking you or the person that had given the dare.

“Aye, don’t be boring, give us a show,” someone shouted from the side and your eyes widened a bit as you realized that maybe you hadn’t really thought this through.

You hadn’t kissed boys, although you supposed it wouldn’t be much different from kissing girls. But you had never expected the first boy you kissed would be Jaemin, one of your closest friends. Yet you didn’t mind, or at least the alcohol in your system helped you not to mind.

“You better make my first kiss with a boy worth it, Na” you mumbled jokingly and then leaned closer, pressing your lips against his softly.

He seemed taken aback for a second, yet reacted almost immediately after that, kissing back and tilting his head to the side to deepen the kiss. His hand moved from your cheek to the back of your neck as he seemed to pull you closer. His tongue gently darted along your lips and you gladly opened them, letting him do whatever he pleased, the alcohol on his tongue mixing with the taste of vodka in your own mouth. You could hear cheers around you, and you could hear your brain complaining about what Renjun would think of you, but Jaemin was very distracting from both of those. Apparently, people weren’t lying when they said he was skilled with that stuff.

When he finally pulled away, you could feel your head spinning a bit, the oxygen a little short for your already intoxicated brain and you stumbled a bit as you sat back down. Renjun wrapped his arms around you quickly to help you so you wouldn’t fall. You thanked him softly, smiling at Jaemin. The other boy had already sat back down as well, seemingly calm, although his eyes were moving around anxiously. ‘Was I a bad kiss?’ was the first thought in your head, making you widen your eyes slightly. And being the dysfunctional drunk you were, the thought stuck with you for the rest of the game. You answered some questions, did some dares but didn’t even give them thought. Your mind was entirely somewhere else. All you could think about was that you had been so bad Jaemin regretted it... and that you wouldn’t be good enough for Renjun.

Caught up in your thoughts, you didn’t notice it had been your turn to spin the bottle until Renjun shook you gently. You blinked, eyes focusing on him and widening slightly when you realized how close he was. Your head was spinning and suddenly you felt the urge to kiss him.

“Sorry, someone take my turn,” you coughed out, getting up and walking away quickly as panic flooded your mind.

You headed straight for your room, closing the door behind you and leaning your back on the wall. You could feel tears rushing to your eyes so you took a large sip of your drink to distract yourself. It was going to be okay, you thought, you'd sober up and it would get better. This was a dumb reason to cry anyway.

“You okay, princess?” you heard a familiar voice suddenly. Not expecting him to be there, you jumped up slightly, looking over at Jaemin. “Sorry, I just got worried when you left so quickly and wanted to check if everything is alright.”

“Was I a bad kiss?” you asked, not really paying attention to what he had said. You could only focus on one thing at the moment.

“I’m sorry, what?“ Jaemin widened his eyes, choking slightly on air.

“Did it feel bad? Kissing me, I mean,” you reworded your question, your lips trembling a little.

“Of course not!” he shot back immediately, his face heating up noticeably. “You were one of the best kisses I’ve ever had,” he added a little more collected this time as he looked away and coughed awkwardly. You weren't sure if he was honest or just saying that to calm you down but decided not to question it for your own sake. You pouted and looked at your drink.

“Good enough for Renjun?” you asked quietly instead. You hadn’t mentioned your crush in front of the boys in your friend group because you were scared they would spread the information just because they were friends, yet at the moment that wasn’t your biggest concern. Jaemin didn’t reply though. When you looked up, his face was blank. “I’m sorry, that was a dumb question, ignore it,” you forced a laugh and took a sip from your drink as if to say ‘Look, everything’s so alright I can even drink!’

“You haven’t confessed to him yet because you’re scared you wouldn’t be good enough at kissing?” Jaemin asked, raising his eyebrow as his usual teasing grin slowly took back its place on his lips.

“Well, not just a kiss, I,“ you started explaining, then a gasp left your lips and your eyes widened. “You know?!” you screeched and covered your face with your hands.

“It’s just a little obvious,” Jaemin replied jokingly as he stepped closer to you and pulled your hands away from your face, taking the glass away from you and setting it down on the shelf near you. He’d closed the door after he’d walked in, leaving the two of you alone in your bedroom. “Now tell me, what did you mean?”

“Well, I’m scared I’ll be a disappointment,” you signed, leaning back against the wall and crossing your arms. “I’ve been with girls before. But I’ve never been with a boy, I’m scared I’ll mess up when I’m with him and he won’t want to be with me but won’t tell me because he’s just too sweet and we’ll be stuck in a relationship he doesn’t want and I can’t let go.” You were ranting at this point, the alcohol blurring your thoughts.

“You know he wouldn’t judge you for something like this,” Jaemin said quietly, one of his hands gently cupping your cheek, which made you remember the kiss earlier when he had held you the same way. “And I’m sure you’d figure out what to do quickly anyways” he added, a small smile curving his lips as if to comfort you. You were quiet for a bit, your mind once again working on its own thing.

“I know! You’ll teach me!” you exclaimed suddenly, grabbing his arms excitedly. In your eyes, there was a glimmer and Jaemin had to take a step back.

“What?!“ he choked out, and you giggled, finding his surprise adorable.

“Teach me how to please a boy, Nana,” you asked, a grin spreading your lips at the brilliant idea you had just had.

“I think you should stop drinking and just go to bed, Y/N,” the boy chuckled awkwardly, pushing you away from himself. He pulled you gently to the big bed in the corner of the room.

You narrowed your eyebrows - going to sleep wasn’t what you had wanted. So when the two of you reached the bed, you pushed Jaemin to sit on it instead, surprising him enough so he couldn’t stop you, and got in his lap. Your arms came to rest on his shoulders and you looked down at his wide eyes and flustered expression.

“I’m serious, Jaemin, you have experience with these things and I trust you.” You could see him swallowing hard, hopefully, that was supposed to mean that he was giving in. “Teach me how to fuck boys, Jaem” you whispered, begging him with your eyes.

He was still unresponsive. And if you had been sober, you probably would have apologized already and stepped away. But you weren't. So instead of that, you let your head drop until your lips could press comfortably against the skin of his neck and you started leaving open-mouthed kisses down his neck. Then you decided to go back on the same path, this time sucking and nibbling gently along the way. If the way he swallowed dryly and let out a shaky breath was any indication, your actions seemed to be doing the trick and a pleased smile curved your lips. Getting bolder as he didn’t seem to want to stop you anymore, you took it further, lips attaching to a spot you liked and sucking harshly, aiming to leave a mark. At the same time, you rolled your hips against his.

“Fuck-“ Jaemin moaned out lowly at the action, and his hips bucked up slightly against you.

And then you felt a bulge in his pants, pressing against your thigh. You thought that would mean you had won, yet suddenly he pushed you away, startling you enough to make you take a step back and off his lap. His eyes were blown wide as he looked at you, his breathing - heavy.

“Love, believe me, I would love nothing more than to push you onto this bed and have you scream my name,” he said. For some reason, the pet name sent tingles down your spine. Or it could have been the things he’d said. Or the low, raspy tone of voice that you had never heard before. You blamed it on the alcohol.

“Then why haven’t you yet?” you asked, attempting to sound seductive, yet it came out as more of a whine. “What do you want me to do, Nana? Beg for you? Beg for your dick? I can do that, I will do whatever you want me to do.”

Your eyes were tearing up a little bit at this point. You were drunk and you were now horny, and Jaemin was like a ray of light, a promise of a good time. He had just said that he wanted to do this too. So why was he still refusing?

“Y/N, you are literally wasted,” he said, his eyes softening as he stood up from the bed and approached you again. His hands cupped your cheeks, squishing them slightly and you narrowed your eyebrows. “I am not going to do anything with you in such a state.” He must have seen the disappointment on your face though, as he let out a soft sigh and pecked your lips gently, surprising you. “Listen, if when you wake up tomorrow, you still remember this and you still want me to… teach you, we’ll talk about this more, okay?”

You wanted to argue, to insist on it being right then and there. But you knew that he wouldn’t step down. And deep down, you were grateful about it. And maybe your eyes were stinging a lot more than they did a minute ago, and the bed seemed awfully inviting now.

“But what about you though?” you asked quietly, looking away from him. It wasn't until you looked back at him due to his lack of response, that you realized he didn’t understand your question. “Well, I made you… hard...?” you said, almost a question.

A chuckle left Jaemin’s lips and he shook his head a little as he pulled you to the bed, letting you lay down and carefully tucking you under the covers. His fingers got buried in your hair and he gently hummed. You were drifting away faster than you had expected. By the time his quiet reply came, you were already too gone to make out the words.

The pain in your head was a bitch. There wasn’t a single thought in your mind besides “fucking hell” for the first few hours after you'd woken up, thankful that Jaemin had been smart enough to throw his party on a Friday, so you could sleep in and die in peace. You didn’t remember getting in bed, but you didn’t really bother about it. It was your own house, you had probably gotten tired and had gone to sleep, in your room, as normal as that.

With a quiet groan, you got up, first heading into the bathroom for your usual morning routine, as well as to take a shower - you felt as if the smell of alcohol had soaked up in your bones. After that, you went to the medicine cabinet in the kitchen. There wasn’t much, but you managed to find a pack of painkillers and gladly took two. You could only hope they would work soon.

Finally feeling a bit more conscious, you decided breakfast would be nice. Obviously, you weren't in the mood to prepare anything complicated, so you just put two slices of bread in the toaster. While waiting for them to be done, you finally checked your phone. Usually, it would be the first thing you do when you wake up, but today you hadn’t had the power to. First of all, you decided to check your messages - there were some from all of your friends from last night.

“you okay?"; "nana said you went to sleep”; “kinda weird if u ask me”; “did you really fall asleep at your own party-” had asked Karina. A chuckle escaped your lips. You quickly typed back an apology, assuring her that you were okay before you opened Hyuck’s message. The smile on your face quickly dropped after you read that one, confusion taking over you.

“girl, if u thought no one would notice the giant hickey on jaemins neck-“ That was the first one. There was another one that made your pulse speed up. “fucker was looking too smug when he came back from ur room did u like suck him off or smth???”

Still unsure what he meant, you opened Renjun’s message. “Jaemin told us that you’d had too much to drink and needed rest. I hope you feel okay in the morning. Make sure to drink lots of water”. After that, there was another short one “Text me if you need anything” followed by a smiley emoji and a heart, which made you melt on the inside a little.

You were more than confused though, your brain was working at its maximum capacity in a hangover state as you moved your toast to a plate, together with some fruit, and then returned to your room to eat there. Munching on a piece of bread, you tried to remember what had happened last night. Finally, you decided that this called for drastic measures.

“Aye, thought you might have died,” were Donghyuck’s first words when he picked up the phone, his voice the usual childish tone over the speaker, a grin evident even in the way he spoke. “Am still waiting for an answer, what did you do to the poor boy?”

“That’s the thing, Hyuck, I don’t remember doing anything,” you sighed, rolling your eyes as you already regretted calling him. “I don’t really remember even being with him, honestly, I must have completely blacked out after… uh, say, did we play something last night...?” you asked, narrowing your eyebrows and nervously nibbling on your nail as you vaguely remembered sitting in a circle with a lot of other people.

“Yeah, truth or dare,” the boy responded, chuckling. “You don’t remember?” You didn’t respond for a while, which the boy seemed to take as a confirmation. “Well, uh…”

“Donghyuck...?” you asked carefully after a moment of silence. “Did I do something really weird?” Still no response. It was unusual for him to be so quiet and you were starting to get very nervous.

“I mean aside from telling everyone that you’d date Renjun and making out with Jaemin, I don’t think there’s anything you could worry about,” he said finally, his voice the normal lazy tone he had as if he hadn’t just told you what he had just told you.

“WHAT???” you screeched, hearing him whine on the other side that you had broken his ears. “Please tell me that you’re messing with me, please, Hyuckie,” you whimpered.

“Nah, you straight up had your tongue down Jaemin’s throat as if your life depended on it. Like, technically you asked for it. It was his dare and he was going to drink but you insisted quite passionately,” he replied casually as if that was the most normal thing ever. “And the Renjun thing wasn’t even that serious, I mean I doubt anyone took it that seriously.” He at least had the decency to try to sound reassuring.

You needed a moment to take it all in. Your fingers got buried in your hair, tugging on it in shock. “Do you think he caught on? He’s smart enough, he probably understood what it meant…“ you whispered, not even minding that Donghyuck seemed to be quite aware of your feelings for Renjun. “I don’t even wanna know what he thought of me - saying that and then kissing… kissing Jaemin,“ you choked on the last words, the thought was so foreign to you.

“It really wasn’t that serious, it was a dare and we had all drank quite a lot, he’d be an idiot to think any less of you for it. But maybe your drunk self was worried too, y’know, you were staring at him for a while there before you suddenly ran away to your room,” the boy on the other side said, humming. His tone seemed a bit more serious now as if he had caught onto your distress even though he was still joking about it.

You pushed your brain more, trying to find the pieces in your mind now that you knew what you were looking for. You could remember the feeling of soft lips on yours, even though the face was not there. “What happened after that? Do you know?”

“All I know is that Jaemin went after you.” You let out a hum, still trying to think. “He came back down about 20 minutes later with a giant dark bruise on his neck. He looked very distracted also, like, he seemed to be thinking about something, fidgeting around all the time and-“

Before he could finish his sentence, you let out another loud screech. It had finally clicked. Not all of it was there, but enough had returned to you and you wanted to die. To bury yourself alive and not ever appear in the land of living again.

“If you’ll repay me for my help by making me permanently deaf, I will just hang up,” Hyuck whined, but you couldn’t care less. You were horrified by your own actions.

“Donghyuck, I asked Jaemin to teach me how to have sex.”

Silence.

“You did what-“ it was a mix between a choke and a laugh as if Donghyuck was in disbelief. Understandably so. This was something quite out of your character. “Sweetie, correct me if I’m wrong, but weren’t you crushing on Renjun for, like, the past couple of years?”

“I asked Jaemin cause I was scared I’d fuck up with Renjun, I’m… Hyuckie, what do I do?” you cried out, your head falling on your desk, but you barely noticed the pain in your forehead. “Hyuckie, I literally begged him and threw myself on him.” It was quiet on the other side of the line for a while and when Donghyuck spoke again, amusement laced his tone, as if he was a second away from bursting out laughing.

“Well, well, now it all makes sense…” You were just going to ask what he meant, when he continued, his tone turning suddenly more serious than you ever remembered hearing him. “I would suggest you think very carefully about this and call him and talk to him about the situation.”

“I- I mean, of course, but… Am I missing something else here?” you asked, lifting your head and narrowing your eyebrows in confusion.

“No, Y/N, just be careful. I gotta go now, Karina’s waiting for me” he said, his tone finally lightening up again and you knew you'd have to ask your best friend about it later.

“Bye,” you replied quickly, a second later the hang-up tone resonated around your room.

You picked up your phone again, nibbling on your lower lip as you reread Renjun’s message. What was he thinking of you now? He was an angel, he probably didn’t even think much of your behavior last night, brushing it off due to the alcohol you had consumed, just as Donghyuck had. But maybe he found it inappropriate. What if he had thought that you were innocent and sweet and now his opinion had been ruined forever? You figured that you didn’t dare ask and find out. So in the end, you sent him a short “Thank you” with a heart emoji, before sending Jaemin a text that you'd be at his place in 30 minutes.

Waiting at the door for Jaemin to open was nerve-wracking. You could feel your hands shaking and you were tempted to turn around and run away. Actually, that seemed like a great idea. You could call him from home, why had you even decided to meet up in person in the first place?

“Hey, princess,” his greeting startled you and ruined the chance of escaping, your wide eyes meeting his soft ones, a bright smile on his lips. He looked just like any other time you'd seen him as if nothing had happened. His hair was still messy, as if you had just woken him up, which would make sense on a Saturday morning after a party. He was wearing a large t-shirt and loose sweatpants and he looked so soft you wanted to squish him and put him in your pocket. The irony that this was the same boy you had begged to fuck you was not lost on you. “What’s up, why did you come?” he asked, once again pulling you out of your thoughts.

“I wanted to talk to you,” you squeaked out, embarrassed as to how little your voice sounded. Jaemin’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, yet he smiled even more, even though that seemed impossible, and led you inside and up to his room, taking a pack of chips and two cans of Fanta from the kitchen on your way up.

He opened one of the cans and handed it to you, before opening the other one for himself, and looked up at you.

“What’s up? How are you feeling, by the way, any hangover difficulties?” he asked, his caring nature peaking. You had to take a breath, he was one of the sweetest people you had ever met, how did you get yourself in this situation with him… You shook your head slightly as a no, which was obviously a lie, but you didn’t wanna let yourself procrastinate.

“Nana, I am so sorry for everything I did last night,” you said quietly, not daring to meet his eyes, staring at the wall behind him instead as your fingers were fidgeting with the tab of your Fanta. Yet you still managed to catch the way his expression changed, the smile falling suddenly. It was almost painful.

“So you did remember after all?” he asked quietly, taking a sip of his drink and setting it on the bedside table. “How much do you remember, princess? And what are you apologizing for exactly?”

“I- I think I remember most of it, I remember how I asked you to…“ You couldn’t finish the sentence, so you took a sip of your drink instead, trying to calm your mind a bit. “I remember I also tried to force you into agreeing…” Unconsciously, your eyes fell on his neck as if searching for… there it was, a bright reddish spot, proudly peeking over the collar of his shirt and suddenly you felt a new wave of embarrassment flooding you. “I am so sorry, I shouldn’t have invaded your space like that without permission,” you shook your head, forcing your eyes away from the bruised skin. "Not that there’s really an excuse for that…"

Jaemin obviously noticed your stare, readjusting his shirt slightly so the collar would cover the hickey. His eyes were gentle as he looked at you while you spoke, his lips pressed in a line.

“It’s okay, Y/N,” he said and something in the way he said your name made your stomach twist uneasy - it didn’t sound like usual, he sounded strained. “I could tell you’re not really in control of yourself, so don’t worry, we can just forget about it, hm?”

You looked up at him, observing his face. You could try to forget about it, of course. But you knew you wouldn’t be able to. And maybe you didn’t remember much, but you were sure he had said… what did he say exactly? Something like ‘I would love to have you scream my name.’ And hadn’t he hinted that he might agree to help you? You took a deep breath, shooting the next sentence out before you could have the time to regret it.

“I still want you to teach me”

Jaemin froze, his eyes widening as he looked up at you as if a second head had just grown out of your neck. You held his gaze, despite your mind literally screaming in fear to run away. You cleared your throat slightly and licked your lips before speaking again.

“You said that if I still want it, we can talk about it, so… If you don’t want to do it, that’s fine, I completely understand, just say something, Nana,” you asked, hoping that you hadn’t just single-handedly ruined your whole friendship.

“Are you completely sure that you want me, specifically me, to teach you about sex?” the boy asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest. His eyes were unreadable, you couldn’t tell whether he wanted to do it, or to say no, you couldn’t even guess what he might be thinking about which honestly terrified you, yet you still nodded.

“I trust you more than any other guy I know, aside from Renjun and Hyuck, but they are obviously not an option. I know that you have experience, it’s not gonna be a jump in the dark…” He was still looking at you with the same expression as if waiting for you to go on. “I don’t even know why I came up with that idea back then, but I know that if I will be having sex with a boy, I would really love it if you’re the first one.” You weren't sure if what you said made sense or if it gave out the right message to the boy, especially since he knew that you liked Renjun.

“I told you last night, and I still stand behind my words, Renjun wouldn’t judge you for something like this,” he pointed out, eyes boring into yours as if he’d manage to read your mind. “You don’t need to do this for him.”

“It’s not only for him, yeah, it may be part of the reason, but I just think it’s time I stopped being afraid of being intimate with a guy,” you tried to make your idea make sense to him. He still seemed doubtful, so you forced an awkward smile on your lips as you added almost jokingly: “And I mean, why would I wanna settle for someone else if I can have the hottest guy I know?”

Tickling his ego seemed to finally do the trick, Jaemin’s mouth curved slightly at the corners and his eyes finally softened.

“Well, if you put it that way…“ he said, laughing cheerfully and you were relieved. “Fine, if you’re sure about it, I will help you,” he agreed, his tone still serious, but now it was just to show he understood the importance of what he was agreeing to. “I’ll go with your speed and I will teach you what you ask me about, okay? If you say you want something, we will do it, but I will not be initiating anything.” You nodded, smiling at him in appreciation.

“Can we not tell the others about it though?” you asked carefully, biting your lips. “I mean, Hyuck knows about last night but… can we keep this just between ourselves?”

“I mean, sure,” he shrugged, taking a sip of his drink before he looked at you again and grinned. “We have a deal, princess, just hit me up when you want to-”

“What about right now?” you shot quickly before even realizing it and the surprise on his face was almost comical.

“Well, you sure go all in…” he chuckled, shaking his head. “What do you wanna know first that you’re so impatient about?”

You looked away again, suddenly embarrassed by how eager you were.

“Well, I don’t know, you could just fuck me, like how you said you wanted to last night,” you said, a smirk curving your lips as some sudden wave of confidence washed over you. But it seemed like Jaemin was either not embarrassed to admit that or was better prepared for you now.

“I mean, I would love to,” he chuckled, a cocky smirk on his lips in return. “But lesson number one - don’t fuck a guy who doesn’t have a condom around,” he chuckled, amused at your surprised expression. “Unless, of course, you are taking pills. Or want to risk it with kids.” You quickly shook your head as a no to both.

“Then… we can try something else?” you asked, biting your lips. He was looking at you expectantly and you remembered that he’d said he wouldn’t initiate anything. “Like… we could go on what we dropped off last night and, well, I could give you… a blowjob?”

“You sure?” he asked after a long moment and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

“My God, Nana, if I’m asking you to do it, it obviously means that I’m-”

“Fine then, come here” he interrupted you, something in his eyes flashing and you could feel a shiver run down your spine at his deeper tone. You stood in your spot, frozen for a few seconds and a devilish smirk curved his lips. "Having second thoughts already? You seemed pretty sure just now..." he teased and the subtle mockery in his voice seemed to be enough to get you back to your senses.

Setting the half-empty can on the bedside table, you stood up and made your way over to the boy who had put his arms behind himself and leaned back on them as he waited for you. You weren’t exactly sure whether you were supposed to try and seduce him so the way you plopped yourself on his lap wasn’t exactly graceful or sexy, but he didn’t seem to mind as one of his arms wrapped around your waist to support you.

“I think you should refrain from leaving more hickeys though if you don’t want anyone to know about this,” he chuckled softly and you nodded, although quite honestly the thought made you a bit sad. You had indeed wanted to go ahead and mark him up some more. The thought was quickly pushed to the back of your mind though, in favor of focusing on what you were actually supposed to do.

The task seemed much more difficult now that you knew he wouldn’t stop you and that your mind wasn’t buzzing with too much alcohol.

“You’re supposed to guide me, you know,” you mumbled, wrapping your arms around his neck and another chuckle escaped his lips.

“You wanted to continue from where we stopped last night, I thought you would be okay on your own with that,” he retorted. “Okay, let’s set something straight first,” he licked his lips, his eyes falling on yours for a second before he looked back up to your eyes again. “Is kissing included in this deal? We established yesterday that you are good enough at it already, so there’s no reason to include that in the lessons if you don’t want to.”

You took a moment, considering his question. On one side, he was right and it wasn’t necessary. Plus, it would make the whole thing even more intimate than it already seemed to be. Yet you kind of… wanted to include that as well. And you would probably feel more comfortable if there was something you were already used to in this whole situation. So, finally, you nodded in confirmation.

Seems like that was all he needed as a second later he crashed his lips on yours. For a moment, you were startled by the sudden intensity, yet you kissed back right away, pressing closer to him as if on instinct. He didn’t give you much time, forcing his tongue in your mouth and taking control of you almost immediately. Your fingers pushed through his hair, tugging gently. The arm around your waist tightened its grip and pulled you closer, as his free hand moved to the back of your thigh, squeezing gently.

Kissing Jaemin felt amazing. Even more so now that you were sober and entirely conscious of what was going on. Getting lost in the kiss, you nearly forgot what the real point of this was. You could spend hours more just like this, yet you remembered that “this” was not the main idea of your deal with Jaemin. Getting back to the point, you rolled your hips against his slowly, a low hum coming from the boy in response as he squeezed you harder and bucked his hips up against yours.

“Already getting hard?” you teased him, out of breath, as you pulled away from his lips just enough to be able to speak. You were tempted to go in again, yet you chose against it in favor of kissing down his jawline and lower down his neck, sucking very lightly, trying to keep up your hip movements against him at the same time.

“One of the hottest girls I have ever met literally just asked me to suck me off and is currently grinding on my dick, excuse me if I’m a little affected,” he rolled his eyes, a subtle rasp in his voice as he leaned his head back to give you more space. You felt a flutter in your chest at his compliment. You couldn’t lie, it gave you a small boost of confidence seeing him enjoy your actions so freely.

“Hope I can live up to the expectations,” you whispered against his skin, feeling him shiver slightly at the way your breath hit his skin. Once again, you were kissing down his neck and collarbones. Okay, maybe you were stalling. You were anxious to go on further than this. You tried to excuse the long time you were taking by making sure he was aroused enough to proceed but you knew that the real reason was that you were scared to go on.

“Princess, are you sure you really want to go through with this right now?” he asked breathlessly as if sensing your hesitation. “I already said that I will help, if you’re scared that I will back out by the time you feel ready-” he started but cut himself off when you got off his lap and fell to your knees. The smile you sent his way showcased much more confidence than you actually felt. Pressing his lips in a tight line, he chose to quiet down and observe you.

Carefully, ignoring the slight shaking of your fingers, you reached up and untied the knot of his sweatpants. You chose to look up at him again when you carefully tugged them down together with his underwear. Licking his lips slightly, he lifted his hips to help you, his eyes boring into yours. You let the clothing fall to the floor before finally lowering your eyes to his crotch. The sight overwhelmed you.

The reality of the situation hit you hard as the fact that for the first time in your life you were seeing a man naked (more precisely a man’s lower half), and that man was your best friend Jaemin sunk in. His dick was standing hard between his legs, the tip leaking slightly. You couldn’t objectively compare it to anything, but the size still scared you.

Jaemin gave you a few moments to collect yourself, before letting out a sigh and leaning a bit forward to cup your chin and tilt your head up so you would look at his eyes instead.

“You’re not ready for that, are you?” he asked gently, with no hint of accusation or displeasure in his voice. You gulped slowly. You wanted to go through with it, you wanted to prove that you had not been just talking big words earlier. But you couldn’t push yourself to lie. You expected him to be disappointed, but he smiled instead. “Come on, get up,” he offered.

Something in the way he seemed ready to just drop it all despite literally having you on your knees in front of him made you want to push through, so you shook your head in disagreement. He narrowed his eyebrows.

“Jaemin, I’m supposed to be learning here, how can I learn if I don’t go out of my comfort zone,” you pouted slightly.

“You literally don’t feel comfortable doing this right now,” he pointed out, raising his eyebrow. “Get up, we can do this some other time,” he insisted, yet you still refused to back down. An exasperated chuckle left his lips and he shook his head in disbelief. “Fine. Give me your hand then,” he prompted and you reached up, placing your hand in his expecting one.

Slowly, as if to give you time to change your mind, he brought it forward until both your hands were hovering over his length. His eyes looked into yours for confirmation and when you nodded slightly, he placed your hand on himself, gently wrapping your fingers around the shaft. There was a visible tightening in his body at the action and you observed curiously as he took a short breath before placing his hand on top of yours.

“We’ll leave the blowjobs for next time, okay?” he said and you nodded slightly. “For now, this will do. For both of us,” he clarified, his eyes staring into yours intensely. When you nodded in agreement, he wrapped his fingers over yours and gently tightened his hold as he started moving your hand slowly along his length.

Getting the cue, you took it upon yourself to go on and stroke him, carefully watching his expression for any changes and signs if you’re doing well or need to change something. He seemed tense, though, looking back at you as he slowly moved his hand away and left you on your own. You went for a little longer like that, experimenting slightly by tightening your grip, and were pleased when a sharp exhale escaped Jaemin’s lips, assuring you that, well, at least you weren’t doing terribly.

“You can-“ he said after a while, clearing his throat to get rid of the sudden rasp in his voice before trying again. “You can tease the tip as well if you want.” You hummed in acknowledgment, obediently moving your hand up so you could carefully rub your thumb over his head. The quiet groan that he let out put a small smile on your face so you repeated the action just so you could enjoy the way his body twitched slightly at your actions.

Little by little, you were getting more familiar with what he seemed to enjoy and what made him curse under his breath or bite his lips. You were still hesitant at times, yet by now you were getting the grasp of it. A small thought popped into your mind as you watched Jaemin close his eyes. Slowly, you leaned down and stuck your tongue out, licking the tip as you twisted your hand gently around him.

“Y/N-“ he gasped out, as he unconsciously bucked his hips up and his eyes snapped open at you in surprise. You blinked at him, faking innocence. “Didn’t we agree that-“

“I just wanted to see how you’d react,” you chuckled, biting down your smile as he glared at you. “Am I doing okay?” you asked, using the moment to make sure. Instead of replying, Jaemin scoffed and leaned down a bit to get closer to you.

“The fact that you stopped is killing me right now,” he said, his pupils dilated with lust, you noted. “Be a doll and finish me off, princess, okay?”

The words sounded more like an order than anything and you couldn’t help but gulp slightly. You had been so used to childish and bubbly Jaemin that the slight hint of dominance he showcased made your stomach twist. Having the moment to yourself, you realized just how needy you were yourself. There was no way that the situation wouldn’t affect you, yet you hadn’t really expected it would be like this.

Shifting uncomfortably in your spot, you refocused on the task at hand, meaning, Jaemin’s dick. You noted that the tip was leaking, as well as the slight tightening of the boy’s stomach when you wrapped your hand around him again and renewed your work. Resting your other hand on his thigh, you did your best to make the boy feel good. Squeezing your hand harder at times, trying to maintain a good rhythm, and it wasn’t even about the learning process anymore. You just wanted to give him the most you could right now.

Your effort didn’t go to waste as soon enough, Jaemin’s breathing got hitched, his body tensed up and before you knew it, he came all over your hand and his stomach, making a mess out of his t-shirt (that you honestly regretted keeping on him… but there was time for everything).

It took him a while to calm his breath and focus properly again, his eyes landing on you again. A small awkward smile curved his lips as he reached over to his bedside table and pulled out a pack of tissues. You reached over to get them, but he stopped you and carefully cleaned up your hand instead, as well as his stomach, before helping you up and letting you sit on the bed while he fixed his pants and went to change the t-shirt.

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, feeling how your own arousal had grown to an almost unbearable point. You could ask Jaemin to help you out, you thought… But would that be okay? The deal was to have him teach you the things you didn't know, it wasn't like he owed you any more favors. So you suppressed the idea of having Jaemin eat you out that had popped uninvited and did your best to ignore the wetness between your legs.

“Well, that was something,” he laughed when he was finally back, picking up his forgotten can and taking a large sip. You couldn’t help but notice he avoided looking at you. “You’re not at all bad, you just need to gain confidence,” he smiled at the wall behind your back and you narrowed your eyebrows.

“Nana?” you questioned, getting a hum in response. Yet he still wouldn’t look at you so you got up and walked over to him, grabbing his face gently and turning him so he wouldn’t have the option not to look at you. “You good?” you asked, scared you’d fucked up somewhere. Maybe everywhere.

“Yea, don’t worry, princess,” he smiled, a little strained, yet a blink later he went back again to beaming as usual. "Mind still going over this whole thing, y’know,” he laughed cheerfully.

You hummed quietly, choosing to believe him for now, as you smiled as well.

“Jaem,” you said, drawing a hum from him before you leaned over to peck his cheek. “Thank you for helping me,” you mumbled quietly, before pulling away from him with a grin. “Now, I remember that you promised me at the end of last year that we can watch that show I've been waiting for together and you still owe that to me.”

And with that, the tension from earlier seemed to go away, the deal buried down in both of your minds until the next time, as you made your way to the living room and curled up on the couch together with a pack of chips.

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