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midnightsnyx · 6 months

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girl at home | mat barzal | part 5

pairing: mat barzal x fem!reader summary: you’re eighteen when you find yourself pregnant after Mat leaves for hockey. nearly eight years later, Mat finds out about your daughter and you have to deal with the consequences of not telling him about her.

warnings: swearing, angst, food, fluff, not edited word count: 2.3k authors note: it's my bday tmw and i am going out of town for the weekend so i wanted to get this posted!! also, i have no idea how pr management works so i def got everything wrong so pls don't yell at me lol i feel like this chapter is just like a roller-coaster that went off the tracks and blew up and someones trying to put it back together with tape from the dollar store so im sorry but i hope yall like it anyway and don't hate me pls <3 send your thoughts or come yell at me about this story bc I LOVE hearing from you guys!! It feeds my writing soul. thank u all for the love on this story so far and lmk if you wanna be added to my taglist. also thinking about doing some smau for this fic and wondering if you guys have any ideas or suggestions?

if you asked to be added to the taglist and didn't get tagged it's cause you didn't show up when i searched for you! so shoot me a msg and we can figure it out. also if you want to be added or taken off the taglist please let me know <3

requests are open. masterpost masterlist taglist form ask box

You didn’t think the situation with Mat’s statement could get any worse. You were already being pestered by your mom, your friends and even other parents at the day camps Nora attended. Mostly everyone knew that it was true that Mat was her father at that point so the statement caused questions to rise. Ignoring everybody’s opinions about it was easy but six simple words from Nora were what broke you.

“I thought Mat was my daddy,” she said softly while eating breakfast one morning. She had been quiet since the day before but it continued when she woke up the next morning. You thought maybe she was just moody and tired but it ended up being much more than that.

It took you a minute to answer, trying to figure out where she might have heard or been told that. It wasn’t that surprising that she might have gotten the impression that he was her dad considering how much time Mat had been spending with the two of you or she overheard a conversation. Kids are very perceptive but you couldn’t see how anyone would directly tell her about the public statement and you had been very careful about what you said around Nora and told everyone else to do the same.

Apparently someone didn’t get the memo.

You had two options. You could lie to Nora about what was going on or you could explain it in the best way you could to her. Lying to your daughter was the last thing you wanted to do but figuring out the easiest way to explain it so she would understand was hard. How were you supposed to explain that yes, Mat is her daddy but he was a fucking idiot and told the world that she’s not even though he said he wanted to be in her life. It would have been so simple to take the easy way out but it wouldn’t have been fair to Nora so after she finished her breakfast, you sat her down.

“You’re feeling a little confused, huh?” you asked, watching her fiddle with a loose string on her sweater.

She nodded, still not looking up at you and not offering her thoughts. It was a bit alarming because she was usually a chatterbox, even when she was upset about something. She would let you know exactly what was wrong.

“Who told you Mat was your daddy?”

She finally looked up at you, and the tears threatening to spill from her eyes made you both angry and upset. You were ready to find whoever told her and scream at them but her answer stunned you.

“I heard you talking to Jaxy,” she whispered. “I wasn’t trying to listen but I was coming out to get some water and you said that you were mad at Mat.”

She didn’t elaborate on what else she may have heard which was unnerving because you probably said a lot of things about Mat that night when Jax came over to talk to you about it. You hoped she didn’t stay long enough for your breakdown where you had cried for thirty straight minutes.

She sniffled, wiping a couple tears away. “I don’t understand.”

Your heart broke but you still struggled with how to explain everything to her. Telling her in the beginning was probably a better idea but you were so caught up in your own thoughts and feelings, you ignored the person who should have been your number one priority the entire time.

“Mat is your daddy, baby,” you said. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

I’m sorry I kept you a secret.

“How come everyone is saying he’s not?”

Mat should have been the one to answer this question because it was his doing, but you hadn’t spoken to him since the night he was at your apartment and the two of you argued. He had texted you the day after but you ignored it because you didn’t know what you would say when given the chance.

“Well, sometimes people make mistakes and Mat said something he shouldn’t have,” you explained, hoping it was enough and it seemed to be enough at first but then she hugged you tightly.

“I love you mama,” she said and before you could reply, she quietly asked, “Do you think Mat loves me?”

“I’m sure he does,” you told her and it took everything in you not to cry.

. . .

Liana: dinner at our place @ 6. bring nora and don’t be late!!!

You’re tempted to decline the request and just stay home but you’ve been promising Liana and Nadia that you would actually visit instead of dropping Nora off and leaving like you’ve been doing. Avoiding Mat is becoming increasingly difficult. It’s been two weeks since he released the statement and a week since your conversion with Nora. She’s been asking a lot of questions, ones that you didn’t plan on having to answer so soon. You expected her to be angry with you for not telling her but she took your confirmation that Mat’s her dad with ease.

So it didn’t come as a surprise when her first question was whether Mat would be at the Barzal household for this dinner. You hadn’t bothered to ask Liana, mainly because you knew it would definitely impact your decision to agree to go.

“Did you know that Zoe’s mom and dad aren’t together either?” She says during the drive to the Barzal’s.

You do know this but you humor her. “Really?”

“Yup. Zoe said she spends weekends with her dad and stays with her mommy during the week,” she explains and then moves on to a different topic. You’re a little curious why she would talk about her friends’ living arrangements but when you finally pull into the driveway, your question is answered.

“Do I have to stay at Mat’s on the weekend?” She asks and if you hadn’t already parked the car, you would have hit the brakes.

“No,” you say a little too quickly and sharply because she frowns.

“How come?”

You don’t answer her question right away, getting out of the car and walking around to the other side. She’s already unbuckling her seatbelt by the time you open the door and she’s still frowning.

“Just no, Nora.”

“But Zoe does!”

You can’t explain custody agreements to a seven-year-old so you say the first excuse you can think of.

“He doesn’t live here,” you say, taking her hand and begin walking towards the house. She’s dragging her feet, clearly not happy with your response.

“Do I have to call him dad?”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Just ‘cause,” you say, stopping at the door and turning to her. Her arms are crossed and she’s giving you the look that says she won’t let up until you give her an answer she wants.

“Do you want to call him dad?”

She pauses, looking down at the ground and frowning. After a moment she shakes her head.

“No, but Miss. Jones says you’re not supposed to call your mommy and daddy by their first names ‘cause it’s disrespectful.”

“It’s not up to Miss. Jones,” you say gently. “This is new, and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

After a moment, she mutters a quiet “okay,” and then: “do you think Nadia has ice-cream for dessert?”

“Guess we’ll have to go inside and ask,” you reply and raise your fist to knock on the door but it swings open before you can. Liana is waiting on the other side with a big smile on her face. Nora runs straight to her and giggles when the older girl picks her up and swings her around.

“C’mon in,” Liana says, ushering you inside. So far there’s no sign of Mat so some of the tension leaves your body. After putting both yours and Nora’s shoes aside, you make your way to the kitchen. Nadia is puttering around, juggling a million things but she still smiles softly when she sees you.

“Can I help with anything?”

“You can keep me company,” she says and points to a chair. “Sit down and update me on what you’ve been up to.”

You know that you can’t argue with her so you sit and chat idly with her. She doesn’t bring up anything to do with Mat and you’re not sure what to think about it. You almost slip up and ask if he’s going to be here for dinner but decide not to. You haven’t seen him around since you arrived, so he’s probably out. Maybe with a girl.

Not that you care, obviously.

Mike eventually pokes his head in the kitchen to greet you and ask how you’ve been. He offers to set the table but Nadia shoos him out of the kitchen, rolling her eyes fondly.

“Don’t get married, they’re nothing but trouble,” she jokes but there’s a smile on her face that lingers even after her husband leaves. You always admired their relationship, and were certain that you and Mat would be like it some day but it wasn’t in the cards.

Soon, Nadia calls everyone to dinner. Nora immediately asks why Mat isn’t here and there’s an awkward silence until Liana breaks it.

“He’s busy,” she tells Nora and that must be enough because she just nods and starts eating dinner. Nothing else is said about Mat but just as you’re all finishing dessert, you hear the door open and close and there’s only one person you figure it will be.

Mat walks into the dining room, clearly caught off guard by your presence. Nora hops off her chair and darts over to him, wrapping her arms around his legs and starts chatting excitedly. He’s trying to give her all his attention but his eyes keep flickering to you.

When Nadia and Mike get up to start clearing the table and Liana asks Nora if she wants to go watch a movie, you realize that the three of them planned this. It’s almost like you’re kids again, fighting about something stupid and needing his parents to help fix the problem.

Mat looks at you a little helplessly when the room clears and it’s just the two of you. There’s no way you can yell at him with his family and Nora in the next room and you realize that was also probably planned.

“Can we talk?” he asks and you really don’t want to, but you realize that eventually you’re going to have to talk to him so you nod. You follow him out the back door and the two of you sit on the porch steps in silence until you finally break it.

“Why didn’t you come to me about what PR wanted to do? We could have figured out something together.”

He shrugs, looking at the ground. “I didn’t think to ask you about it. I just wanted to fix everything before it got complicated. I wasn’t thinking.”

“Yeah, no shit,” you mutter. “That’s something you’re great at. You don’t think before you do anything.”

You jump when he stands up suddenly and turns to face you. He’s angry but so are you.

“No, fuck that. You can’t just expect me to do everything right, when a month ago, all I had to worry about was hockey. I can’t be number one dad overnight! You didn’t even tell me about her for six years!”

You’re a bit taken off guard by his sudden outburst but you can do anger too.

“That is the exact reason I didn’t tell you about her, Mat. Hockey is always going to come first in your life,” you snap. “And I didn’t ask you to be a number one dad, all I asked was that you be sure you wanted to be in her life before you committed to anything because this is exactly what I was worried about.”

He falters a little, probably not expecting you to return the anger.

“I didn’t want to post what they asked me to,” he says, sounding defeated. “But I didn’t know how to say no. When PR tells you to jump, you jump.”

You’ve no idea how public relations in hockey works, it’s possible that they would have posted the statement without asking Mat but you’re so damn angry. You’re angry but you don’t know who you’re even supposed to be mad at now.

“You should have come to me,” you say again. “That’s how co-parenting works, you know.”

His mouth twitches. “That’s what we were doing?”

You can feel the anger slowly dissipating. Mat’s shoulders aren’t as tense and he plops back down on the steps so you sit next to him, letting your shoulders and knees knock against his.

“Well, you are her dad,” you admit. “And she is very concerned about her future living arrangements.”

He looks at you a little confused but there’s a small smile spreading across his face.

“Does she know?”

“Yeah,” you tell him. “She’s smarter than you expect sometimes.”

“She gets that from you,” he says, poking your arm.

You roll your eyes fondly. “Well she had to get her brains from someone.”

He huffs but it sounds more like a laugh. You watch him look at the ground, brows furrowed and deep in thought.

“I fucked up, didn’t I?”

Here’s the thing that a lot of people don’t know about Mat: he doesn’t forgive himself easily. It’s something you learned the hard way when you were younger and dating.

So you know he will beat himself up over this until you forgive him.

“Yeah, but we both did.” You bump your knee against his until he looks up at you. “We can fix it, but we have to do it together.”

He holds out his pinky finger. ”Co-parenting, right?”

You hook your finger around his and nod, letting yourself relax for the first time in weeks. It’s going to take time, hard work, and you’re both going to have to learn how to trust and communicate better again but you're sure you’ll get there.

“Together,” you agree.

tag list: @literatureluster @dasiysthings @barzyblogbabe @diary-of-jj @heatherawoowoo @fallinallincurls @topguncultleader @shadowsndaisies @lovinbarzal @whatthepuckisgoingon @alilstressyandlotdepressy @teapartydreams @keiva1000

#hockey imagines #allies writing #nhl fanfiction #hockey fanfiction #nhl imagines #hockey imagine #mat barzal x reader #mat barzal imagine #mat barzal fic #mat barzal fanfiction #mathew barzal imagine #mathew barzal x reader

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sevenpoyo · 8 months

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some brooklyn slang ik for all the ppl who wanna write for miles and kilometers‼️

feel free to add more idk everything but i i am originally from there and visit a lot this stuff i hear a lot and if you wanna add slang to ur writing this is a good place to start, not all of these brooklyn or ny exclusive but that’s where a lot of american slang starts and u prolly heard some of it b4. imma list it ne ways

don’t use like 8 of these in one sentence bc it will sound weird and i can’t really cover ny puerto rican slang or any puerto rican slang really bc my grandad is a bum so if you know some add it

the city is manhattan, not the other 4 burroughs, just manhattan, cus that’s where everything’s at

to cut ass is to roast tf out of someone , to get your ass cut is get tf roasted out of you

wyling/wilding is being outta pocket, something being absurd or crazy

yeah nah means no and nah yeah means yeah idk why they gotta make it complicated just look at the second word

good looks is like good looking out

it’s bout to be winter and i’m bout to see mad christmas fics and shit but do y’all know the proper way to describe cold ny winters?

if it’s cold as hell, it’s brick outside, not regular cold, ny winter is like nipples so hard i see em thru the bra cold

ex; “how it’s so brick outside i walk to the store wit my hair wet and it deadass got icicles in it” “yeah it’s fr brick outside today” “i’m not walkin wit u in this brick ass weather for a bacon egg and cheese?” (actual convo between my sister and me last winter break)

fronting seem kinda easy to me but is like acting or pretending i can’t explain it with out an example

“why you fronting like you wouldn’t die if they text you asking u to go out with them” “you can stop fronting like you like cars it cool if you don’t” “don’t sit there fronting like u don’t wanna dance wit me”

being tight over something is just being upset or annoyed

rj is so smart they said “We say tight bc you kinda huddle close to yourself when you tense/stressed or angry” i had no idea i just be saying it i aint know it had a reason💀 it make sm sense now.

“who got you tight like that this early in the morning?” “my momma came home tight yesterday for no reason, she threw a boot at me!” “i’m so tight this damn shift change has me working all closers this week”

jack is like claiming someone or something

i talk old as hell idk what the youths be jacking nowadays

cop is basically to get, used to be mostly 4 drugs back in the day my dad said (he don’t know why im asking him this)

“just copped me some retro 3’s” “bout to cop me a few percs in a minute”

speaking of a minute, mostly for my non americans bc that’s who get confused the most when i say this one. depending on the context this can mean a actual minute, a short time or a real long

“i’ll be back in a minute” is short “i ain’t seen y’all in a minute” is long. idk how to explain the difference besides context

bop is a good song, pretty easy but i see ppl on tiktok use it wrong

bangs/banger goes hard is kinda like bob for music but i be using it for anything fr

“this push pop is banging yo”

mad can be used normal like angry but it also means a lot or really kinda like hella ig? i usually uses hella when i would say mad so ppl can understand me easier up here

dumb also mean very in the same way

ex; “my english teacher give out mad homework for no reason.” “she be giving me mad shit over the smallest stuff” “i just had some mad good wings so i’m cooling rn” “this shit is mad spicy u sure you want some?” ''This shit got me dumb tight'' “you don’t need no jacket it’s dumb hot out here”

smacked is like high as fuck idk how to elaborate ur just high

lit is drunk

“Yuuuur!'' A signal, a greeting usually used to catch the attention of someone or something very fun greeting and very hated by schools, it’s weird anywhere outside of ny kinda at least to me.

being hollywood means u get a little fame and think ur all that or just that u got a little fame and they’re jokingly hating

ex; “i saw u on the news the other day, “the prowlers return” u must be real proud of yourself huh hollywood?” “and here comes hollywood wit his trending tiktoks”

real talk is when ur about confess something or say something serious in a not real serious setting or convo

“real talk we play a lot but i love you, my life would be boring with out you around” “real talk i’d never do that to you foreal”

go together is like go out kinda, y’all kinda match behavior cus y’all a couple, this one need a sentence 2 i think. (THIS ONE IS OLD AS HELL ONLY USE IT IF UR TRYING TO RIZZ MOMMA RIO)

“he want ur number? he don’t know we we go together or sum?” “why she wanna act like we go together, ion even know her?” “don’t we go together?”

i can’t even explain it with a sentence y’all just gotta figure this one out 💀

A bodega/deli is a convenience store ik most know this from the movie but some ppl think it’s all stores or all spanish stores when it’s just a corner store

the owners of the deli closest to my granddad house is muslim. and so we keep track of all muslim holidays when he’s closed

an ock is the bodega man, miles knows the man’s name at the deli we see him visit, but at any other store he’d call the guy ock

dipping on someone is changing ur mind last minute, usually canceling plans

ex “we was supposed to go get outfits together but they dipped on me last minute”

staticky is like wanting to fight or still being pissed after a fight

static is beef or on sight energy

you good can really be anything but imma list ones i can think of

it can mean like are you ok? or don’t worry about it, or how are you, or stop, or do you got a issue? or do you want an issue? it’s all in the tone of how it’s said fr

'Word of my moms/dads I saw/ did/did not *insert topic*'' Honest term, no lying present in statement i feel like (my cousins be putting anything on they momma fr risking shit on her for no reason)

'hold it down'' handle buisness / take care of someone or something. can also be in refrence to criminal who handles ''buisness''

NOW EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU TO @rashadisback BC HE CARRIED ME ON THIS‼️

i hope this helps any writers that don’t live here!

#42 miles morales x reader #miles morales x reader #atsv x reader #across the spiderverse #atsv

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bonesandthebees · 2 months

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Okay fuck it. I think scrolling for hours today is enough DJFKGKFK I'll just log back out. I wanna focus my energy on more positive things

Im so gonna log back in the minute my friend sends me another tweet but HDKGKGKD no. I will do my best. He's not worth our time man.

Okay one more tiny rant about him and then I promise I'll stop I just OOOHHMYGODHFJGKG HE JUST. I had so much hope. That. He would reply and it wouldn't fix things, I wouldn't go back to watching him or anything but at the very least I could get closure that like? Maybe his closer friends would be able to heal and move on? Idk if that's parasocial or whatever but he was such a big role model for me the past few years I really had hope that at least some parts of it were real, you know? And instead we just find out that he not only did these shitty things but didn't fucking learn and did it to other people too and??? It's really really upsetting that he created this safe space, this community of people who were all so lovely while just being. Fake. The whole time. And he doesn't even have the gull to properly apologise and I just??#?# idk what to do with my emotions LMFAO I'd finally started to feel better and like move on but now today I'm just angry again grgrgfhfjdkdk and I totally get that like him being a complete dickhead is easier in a lot of ways bc there's no. Doubting it. Or anything. Like there's no redeeming him. And we can get closure from that. But fuckkk it hurts so badly and the tl is a mess of ppl being like "well this person would never do me wrong" and then ppl being like "fuck every YouTuber ever actually. We can't ever be sure we know them" and LIKE!$?_?$?

Dude I am so conflicted on so many levels rn I feel like my entire world has just been yeeted into the sun LMFAODKFKFKFK

Anyways. Anyways. Thank you bee. Ur tumblr is the only account w a brain rn fr lmfaodjfkfkfks

I get it, I'm fucking furious at him. he had a chance to at least own up to what he did. I wouldn't have gone back to consuming his content, but I could be somewhat at peace knowing he was taking steps towards being better.

I don't want to think it was all a lie, because abusers aren't all completely evil people. the thing is, wilbur is human. a very shitty human, but human nonetheless. and we can't know for sure how healthy or unhealthy every relationship in his life has ever been and I think overanalyzing that or trying to figure out what was fake and what was real isn't really our business or worth our time. wilbur is a guy who has hurt a lot of people, but also refuses to recognize the hurt he's caused. that's it.

I do hate the dichotomy I'm seeing between people trying to prop up their own favorite white boys on a pedestal because apparently people never learn, but also going out and saying every content creator is inherently evil and we shouldn't trust any of them. these people are human. they're all going to fuck up at some point, some worse than others. and sometimes they'll fuck up in a way that they can move past and we can forgive them for, and other times they'll fuck up in a way that shows they shouldn't have the platform they have. they're not all terrible, and they're not all perfect. that's what we should be keeping in mind for the future.

#ask #icyfox17 #wilbur situation

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prince-liest · 1 month

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I… oh my god. So much. Has happened. Bear… bear with me. This time i KNow its gonna be a long one. First of all, oh my GOD. THERE WAS NO BAD NEWS IN UR LAST ANSWER. HOLY SHIT. I see how i read into ur previous answer, that val is the only dumper, but yes what you described is EXACTLY the same flavor as what I was describing. It also works SO MUCH BETTER, OH MY GOD! “Vox managing to be the one to break things off at any given point in time hinges on him being able to frame his rationale as "anger" rather than "upset," the latter of which just gets brushed under the carpet of Emotions That Are Not Taken Seriously. [...] anything that makes him feel vulnerable or, ah, let's deliberately and pointedly use the word hysterical, is a pre-existing internal struggle that Valentino knows how to manipulate to his advantage. [and vox does not break up with val when he feels as such]” PRINCE IM RIPPING MY FUCKING HAIR OUT!!!!!!!!!!!! THTAS. THATS EXACTLY WHAT TF IM TALKING ABOUT. You just clarified that extra layer of “oh my god this is fucking perfect.’ also. ALSO. them getting back together being sappy makeup sex…. Oh my god. Oh my dear god. If it wasnt clear, i am a Heathen for voxval, too. If you ever feel inspired to write a voxval fic i promise you my firstborn.

OHHHHHH MY GOD IM SO HAPPY MY RAMBLINGS HELPED YOU WITH THE FIC!!!!!! TBH IVE RARELY BEEN THIS OVERJOYED. LIKE I COULDNT STOP GRINNING AND GIGGLING WHEN I SAW IT. FUCKKKKK. Also im fucking cackling that my actual impact was bringing vox to severe distress instead of a more angry and annoyed disposition. Like yeah,,.. Im here to make you suffer, baby. LOVE YOU VOX!

Im gonna leave my thoughts for actual fic for another ask bc… yeah. I will spare you. - 🌓

Do NOT spare me, I enjoy these immensely. >:) Proof:

Very genuinely, I had kinda been squinting at the actual scene in question with dissatisfaction for a hot minute, so I was very pleased when your ask made it click to me what the fuck felt so wrong about it. So thank you!

Staticmoth is definitely percolating in my brain and I want to write something for them because, like you, I am also indeed deeply invested in them (they are my favorite ship very much alongside radiostatic, which is probably not obvious given I haven't written anything actively centered around them - but they're like the fucked up, evil version of MHA erasermic for me in this fandom because they Must be present in the narrative and also I love them). I haven't had any specific ideas good enough to turn into a fic yet, but I might just mash them all together at some point or, y'know. Go the Good Olde [insert wanking hand motion here] route!

#ask #personal #half moon anon #666 live on air #my writing #love this ask loved receiving it greatly enjoyed reading ittttt #fun fact it took me until I took this screenshot made the post and happened to scroll past it on my dash #to notice that I wrote “waiting FOR bated breath” in that message #thanks brain what the fuck was that about

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thesherrinfordfacility · 9 months

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I am going to hazard a guess and predict that most queer viewers are going to side with Crowley in the divorce? The subtext here is usually that Crowley is a queer person who is comfortable in their identity while Aziraphale still doesn't let go of the church and internalized homophobia. And then asking Crowley to try to conform in a way that Crowley has never been comfortable with, implying that in order for this relationship to work you need to be something that you're not (especially potent bc Crowley in particular is explicitly nonbinary/ gender fluid)... its almost violating. That should clearly be asking too much of him and it only hurts worse to realize that Aziraphale doesn't realize that and doesn't truly accept Crowley as he is. Which is a fundamentally Queer Experience Thing.

okay again full disclosure i am not queer, so im only going to answer this to the best of my ability besties, if i don't write things right or deliberately misunderstand a nuance in this, please know im doing my best and anything that is upsetting or offensive please tell me, i am so not qualified to answer this... but nonnie has asked so i shall give it a go!!!✨💓 (cut bc length)

genuine question here: wouldn't, arguably, in this whole choosing sides thing, crowley vs aziraphale, be exactly what divides the queer community? those that could sympathise with aziraphale and his allegory vs those that could sympathise with crowley? this is a genuine question bc i would have thought depending on your (general you) guys' (nb) variety of experiences, good and bad, there are those that could see either side or both?

as for trying to make crowley conform - i'm not going to argue this per se, bc i realise that this must be a very painful concept or experience to go through, and i Will Not invalidate that. but on the other side of the argument, whilst i see and agree that this is how aziraphale could be interpreted generally in this argument, i didn't see it this way at all. not when taking into account aziraphale's whole demeanour in s2.

my understanding is that, as far as the canon has showed us, aziraphale knows very little about the true circumstances of crowley's fall (only that aziraphale warned him against asking questions), and even less about crowley's inner feelings on the matter. whenever aziraphale mentions it, or crowley having been an angel, crowley understandably responds aggressively and angry and obviously that it's still painful.

i don't think it's too far beyond reason for aziraphale to think that crowley - a good demon - might want to take a chance to have the wrong righted (as he sees it), to receive what aziraphale would consider a boon, an apology. whilst he's not in hell's clutches, crowley would have the chance to be free of hell completely. furthermore, it's a chance for them to be together, as friends or otherwise (obvs the metatron conversation is before crowley's confession), and to build the world they want - fair and honest and kind - together. because it's not as if crowley doesn't want that, but he just won't go anywhere near being an angel in order to do it - borne of fear yes but also resentment and bitterness... possibly even arrogance.

aziraphale does lord his angelic status over crowley especially in s1, and does hold a very black and white view over angels = good, demons = bad, but for the most part i think he has started to explore the possibility of grey more in s2. he starts to ease back on crowley and concentrate on making him feel wanted and loved (however that might look on Their Side), but still leaving him agency.

ive talked about aziraphale putting him on a pedestal and that is true, but the person on that pedestal, I don't think, is angel crowley - i don't think it's that simple. i think it's good demon crowley. and that good demon crowley would want to change the world, right?? well, he's got to be an angel to do it - even better!!!

so i didn't necessarily see it as aziraphale wanting to change crowley at all, but instead him thinking that based on what crowley has told him, of course crowley would want this!!! he deserves to be forgiven and restored, he's earnt it and he's a good person!!! but aziraphale unfortunately reneges on his emerging attempts to give crowley that agency, and instead decides for him. i don't think it was necessarily out of wanting to change crowley, but instead him not knowing the full story and therefore choosing a resolution for crowley out of love and respect... but one that crowley doesn't want.

these boys REFUSE to communicate and 👏 it 👏 shows👏✨

#good omens #good omens season 2 #good omens spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #god this one was hard to explain #anon i hope i made sense!!!!#not a shitpost but its good omens babyyyy #ask

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dilucsfav · 2 years

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guys this wasn’t a request but i kinda really wanted to do kazuha bc hhhhvhh he’s so soft and sweet and so pretty just.

I PROMISE I’LL ANSWER AND WRITE THE REQUESTS AND ASKS SOONN, but they’re all cyno requests (i love writing about him, dont get me wrong! but i don’t wanna write too much bc i’d hate for you guys to get tired of the cyno writing)

kazuha hcs and scenarios!!

warning(s): fluff, not much nsfw but it’s there,, SLIGHT angst in one of the hcs

okay but if kazuha lived in 2022 with us, he would listen to cavetown. im right idc. imagine him listening to juliet and lemon boy and AHDHJHJ

^^ stop imagine sharing an earbud with him and his head is just resting on your shoulder or your head is resting on his. wtf pls. hawdusukhfebsfekj.

his pet names for you would be like "my flower," "my sweetheart," "my (Y/N)." he loves saying my before your name or before a pet name.

leaf dates?? stop he would literally walk around and point out leaves to you and tell you the name of them and what it means to him. hes so cute wtf.

HE WOULD LITERALLY TEACH YOU ORAGAMI BUT WITH LEAVES.

oh my god and then you get him a little scrapbook with a bunch of nature things for his birthday?? stop he would fall in love with you all over again

when you two are out looking at nature, kazuha would be the one showing you honeysuckles and teaching you how to drink the nectar shit from them (please thank my wonderful and amazing partner for that headcanon).

^^ and then when you accidentally break one, he'd totally laugh at you but then give you that soft smile of his

^^ "Ahh, let's try that again, my (Y/N)."

the way kazuha would wake up in the mornings and kiss you awake. WITH A KISS ON YOUR FACE BETWEEN EACH OF HIS WORDS.

"Time- to- wake up- my- sweetheart." before kissing your lips hundreds of times. HJHJDHABH.

his favorite places to kiss are your palms, the back of your hands, the insides of your hands, your fingertips, your wrists and shoulders.

he loves your arms, clearly. (its because he loves holding your hands, it gives him a sense of warmth and comfort)

i can imagine when he reads or does studies of any kind, he wear glasses and he'd need them to focus on whatever he’s working on.

imagine he’s sitting and so concentrated on his book with his eyebrows knitted together. like he just looks like a big and relaxed teddy bear

if kazuha gets upset or mad with you, he’ll never try to yell or even raise his voice. he’s so soft and gentle when speaking to you, even when there’s conflict !!

you were the person who was beside him whilst he was coping with tomo’s death. that helped a lot with how comfortable he was with you :((

nsfw:

soft switch?? but i can understand some soft dom vibes too idk he’s a tough cookie to crack ;;

it doesn’t matter how angry he is or stressed or whatever- he’s always gentle. yes, maybe when he’s stressed he needs a little more oral or multiple rounds, but he’s never mean during sex

while he’s putting it in, he’ll take your hair and lift your head up, kissing up and down your neck and shoulder.

his hands are never off of you— whether they be on your hips, legs, back— they’re always somewhere

or if you’re putting it in him—

he moans in bed. and whines. i am never wrong.

can you tell i love kazuha??

#kazuha #kazuha kaedehara #genshin impact #genshin fluff #genshin x reader #genshin fanfic #genshin impact smut #genshin smut #kazuha x gender neutral reader #kazuha x reader

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giyuulatte · 4 months

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alright i finally finished the uncanny counter 2 and…

hmm

my thots and spoilers below

THIS IS ALL MY OPINION AND IM BLABBING AND IT IS YAP TIME

it’s 1am so i’m a lil coocoo

once again all MY OPINION if anyone sees this

honestly speaking this season was alright. it def did not compare to season one, which i was expecting. yet it wasn’t up to par with it either. it felt like too much and not enough at the same time so it kinda fell flat to me

in season one everything was connected and there were very clear motives. from the bullying, so mun’s parents, the evil spirits, ji chung shin himself, and the corrupt government. and chung shin’s backstory made me feel for him which is what made him a great antagonist imo. like i loved him

but hwang pil gwang (slick back), gelly (hongjoong variant LMFAOO), and wong (just wong tbh)….mmph

i can’t really remember the beginning it took me 2 months to finish it but, dude and his crew showed up outta nowhere and just started creating chaos for funsies???? now don’t get me wrong, i’m all for villainy for fun but i just couldn’t get into for some reason with them. it just feels like their characters weren’t fleshed out enough for me to actually like them no matter how fine they are bc the whole crew could get it

and then we move to ma ju seok my adoring and loving husband. now this was something i could get behind. him going on a rampage trying to get revenge for his wife and baby, having enough rage to summon an evil spirit on his own??? like that’s what i’m talking about!!! i felt for him and wanted him to succeed bc that con man was also annoying as shit. i really and truly wanted him dead bc he was the absolute worst jfc

if the story only focused on him, and getting his revenge and having to take him down. and only him. seeing how far his rage could take him and what would happen ON HIS OWN without any outside manipulation pil hwang *coughs* would have been a lil more interesting to me and i think i would have enjoyed it more. ik pil gwang wanted his power n shit BUT WHY. like give me a reason.

TO ME hwang pil gwang and his crew added absolutely nothing to this for me. and gelly betraying slick back and all that other stuff just felt unnecessary to me. gelly not being able to do anything and literally almost every single time the crew showed up, and bc pil gwang wouldn’t help her. GIRLY STAND UP AND HAVE SOME RESPECT YOU ARE A BADASS TF YOU DOIN???? GET OFF YA KNEES

AND ms chu’s newest child lim jae yeol….why was he there??? and be honest. what did he do for the plot other than give ms chu another child and show her backstory

and then do hwi, lawd my sweet piano man. WE WENT THROUGH ALL THAT JUST FOR HIM TO FORGET HA NA IN THE END I WAS SO PISSED bc once again. what tf did he add. i feel like he could have been good to ha na, genuinely. imagine getting dumped by ya not girlfriend after y’all done hung out together and have each other hiccup remedies, and then getting attacked by someone who finna rap they verse in bouncy i am so dead

i understand they were trying to idk, give their characters more depth but pls

mo tak punching so mun was NAWT on my 2023 kdrama bingo card. and he didn’t even apologize for it!!!! i understand he was angry and upset bc he thought lost his partner and so mun was doing a bit too much but i just feel like that was outta character for him to do…. and for him to not apologize for it was just, what???

and don’t get me started on jeok beong. i was um, expecting a lil bit more. yoo in soo is a FANTASTIC actor. if you told me he was gwi nam from aouad before hand i would have passed out. THAT MF RANGE IS INSANE!! but, but, jeok bong could have been more. i love him to death but he stayed the same person the entire time. granted towards the end he did start meshing with the group a bit better and throwing ideas out and stuff but i dunno bruh. i was feeling him and not feeling him at the same time.

the same goes for kang ki young. baby if you say that was myung seok from attorney woo i would have passed out pt2. like he did his thang bc i deadass hated his character even tho he was looking good as hell

the lack of so mun’s friends also bummed me out bc i really like them and they are an important part of his life. wanted to see more of those three together as well. my found family was not found with them this season

but the counters dynamic was still a++ like that’s real family. teasing ha na and do hwi, ha na having to save so mun while he was in a coma, then going to yung to ask why so mun leaving, jeok bong calling mun his brother just *wipes tear* magnificent

and why tf did mun have to lose his powers again. we did that shit in season one there was no need for that tbh

nothing to say about ms chu god bless.

nothing to say about jang mool god bless.

mun going over seas and seeing wi gen’s daughter like ENOUGH.

just…. too much, and yet not enough at the same time.

but i still very much enjoyed 8.5/10 BAYBEE

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onlyjaeyun · 3 months

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I think my head is going to explode.

He asked if she was ok.

Lowkey that is huge.

(AND SHE FREAKING KNOWS ITS HUGE. SHE TOTALLY KNOWS.)

And it’s bothering him that she’s not ok. He hasn’t lost interest he’s freaking worried. That’s why he hasn’t been back. But she doesn’t know that. Omg.

What is he going to dooooooo? (Because this Hoon is delicious. He is a man of ACTION always. Nothing simmers in him too long before it comes out one way or another. That’s why he touched her in the first place. That’s why he beat up Jaemin. That’s why he said something to Fuma. His feelings really do drive him and honestly I love it.) Is he just gonna show up? Kidnap her and force her to go get her nails done? My money is on randomly showing up…Like Riki’s at his house for some whatever thing so Hoon just goes down and starts banging on her door and she answers wearing his shirt (because the forgetting him is NOT going well)…

I don’t want to pin all my hopes and dreams on this but like… I’m really rooting for him to do something healing here. I mean maybe he’s not there yet but MAYBE HE IS or maybe he is so high key desperate for her body (at least that’s the excuse he’ll tell himself) that he’s willing to take care of her a little to get what he’s craving.

GAH! I don’t know. I have no idea where you’re going next but MAN am I desperate to get there. Like there is no denying he’s bothered by her pain. It’s there. He’s angry about it—but it’s full there on his angsty little tumblr. Her pain truly upsets him—but forreal that is nothing new (just ask Jaemin).

I know you’re cooking up some way to bring them back together. (And I’m obviously dying to know what it is) I figured (because I feel like you’ve hinted at it?)—though I could be totally wrong—but I figured that they would start to fall for each other again even before they realized that their initial fallout was due to a misunderstanding and maybe I’m delulu but I’m wondering if this particular moment is going to be the start of that like…manifesting? Because I mean I know the hate is there, but there’s also something else—something deeper and it’s so clear and I just love how hard both of them are trying to pretend that something doesn’t exist.

But you can only fight being someone’s soulmate or whatever for so long ya know…

see what i mean? how is this not the most beautiful commentsry on a piece of work youve ever seen?? I LOVE WRITERS SO SO SO MUCH 🥺 thank you for this baby, i really hope you know how much i appreciate your asks, they really make my day :(

i love how you commented I KNEW IT on the last chap bc i knew you'd say smth and i got so gigglybfkenfoemfl ngl i wasn't gonna make him beat them up just warn and scare them a little but this ask and your thoughts inspired me to do more bc it fits his character so well so thank you so much angel 🥺💗

i don't wanna spoil too much but your thoughts and assumptions about his feelings for her changing is definitely quite close to what i have in mind and i love how similar our brains work 🤭🤭 can't wait for your resction when you read the next chapter bc our baby's been a little unsure about herself and well, hoon's the one who might give her a hand or two to desl with those bad thoughts..all im gonna mentionnis a mirror!🤕

#; mailbox 📬#; cold hearts

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dangopango00 · 3 months

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When You’re Upset HCS

Legato x gn reader

A/N: Yes i am so upset shhhh but it gave me sm inspo ok enjoy can u tell im obsessed with him idk i think its pretty subtle.

CW: I put a lil comedic remarks bc i stopped being upset halfway through (distractions make me feel better)

(Breaking it down into three parts: Does he know [sorry it was funny], what does he do, when ur back to normal)

Does he know?

- IMMEDIATELY. I mean if its just a minor annoyance and nothing serious then it would be hard for him to catch on bc hes not very attuned to others feelings nor is he used to noticing subtle changes

- He does try his best to be attuned to ur feelings though and if ur seriously upset then hed definitely notice

- What tips him off most is ur attitude

- Whether ur an introvert extrovert ambivert whateverrrrs you always have this kind of positivity about you (which is necessary to be around him healthily)

- However, ofc, this quality is lost when ur upset

- Youre around him and or talking to him much less and keeping to yourself more even if u arent upset with him specifically which hed immediately notice (hes a little clingy when it comes to spending time with you. That shit gets serious for him 🤞🤞)

What does he do?

- I think it depends on what you do tbh Id say hes pretty reactive

- If you were to rant to him abt whatever is upsetting you (even if its him) he’d just sit and listen

- He doesnt really know what to do so the best he can do is lend an ear and will only really chime in if he thought of a solution for the issue or to apologize if u told him he did sth wrong and he has no dispute abt it

- Might add in a few “Mmm”s or “Ah”s just so u know hes listening but dont be surprised when most of the time he just sits silently and stares right at u, ofc hes listening

- If you seem to get really upset during ur rant (like panic attack or super angry) hed do something simple to make you feel better like awkwardly patting ur head/back and tell you to stop. Talking (hes doing his best ok he just means to say take a break from ur rant and calm down a bit)

- Will also get u water or generally a drink during the above situation

- If you were to hide that you’re upset and try to be normal I think it would puzzle him as to why you’re acting like this when he can clearly tell you’re upset

- He’d first observe u for a while and wonder if maybe its a small matter so/or you didn’t want to get him involved

- Even if it IS small hed still be worried during the time you’re upset so hed just do subtle things for you to make your days smoother and avoid stressing you out further like getting food for you or running errands for you (does this anytime you’re upset no matter the circumstance but it increases like 10x in this specific scenario)

- If your condition doesn’t improve or if it suddenly improves without warning he’ll do his best to convey to you that u can rant if u need to

- “What is troubling you” or “What is your problem” something short like that is the best he can do for now but you can hear how worried he is in his slightly wavering voice as his curious gaze scans over you

- If you were to just shut down; go catatonic he would be worried most in this scenario because of the stark contrast in your usual personality

- Like the last scenario, hed observe u first but hed act quicker with this

- Hed almost immediately ask whats troubling you like millions thoughts are running through his mind:

What if someone had threatened you?

What if he did something and didn’t even notice it?

What if someone was already hurting you?

What if you hate him?

What if—

- Considering you were already catatonic you likely don’t tell him what’s upset you so much which he takes as a sign to stick by your side even closer so he can observe the situation himself

- Hed sit next to you while you lie motionless, rest his hand on your head and if you aren’t opposed he’d mess with your hair and massage your scalp a bit

- If he knows you’re touch averse like him he wouldn’t even get the idea to do this and would instead just sit beside you, hoping you answer his previous question

- If you aren’t, he gets this idea BECAUSE you seem to like touch and this is what he can offer without being overwhelmed or anything (idk how to explain it but like he often thinks about how you deserve someone who can fulfill your needs and in his mind touch is one of those but its just something he cant do currently and its a bit of a sore spot)

- General

- No matter what the scenario he is asking WHO upset you; he just wants to talk to them 😊 #loveandpee

- Will alwayssss engage in acts of service hoping it makes you feel even a little better. Hes peeling the orange just gws, please.

- Spends as much time as he can by your side; hes very worried and really wants to know whats up but he doesnt want to prod so much that it makes u clam up even more

- Overthinks wnv ur upset even if outwardly he hardly says or expresses anything at all

- Acts like ur personal spokesman guard dog butler bf when ur upset even if hes none of those (will speak for you and defend you if ur upset and someones trying to pick at u)

When you’re back to normal?

- Hes so normal (lie) Hed be so happy 😭😭

- All this time hes been worried sick about why you were upset and if it was so bad that youd been upset more than a day? Whewww he was sooo worried you might never go back to how you were because what if it was something that completely changed your worldview?

- If you didnt ever go back to normal then itd be like seeing the last of a campfire burn out on a cold unforgiving night. It would be such a shame bc ur positivity has been keeping him a bit more positive and just. You get him through the day although he never really noticed it himself— that is until you were the one who was upset and pessimistic

- Hes so sweetie pie he follows u around like a lost dog; its as if hes clinging to sunshine after dealing with the harsh winds of winter. He just needs to make sure that you’re completely okay and wants to soak up some of ur usual energy for himself in the meantime

- All this is going on in his head but lol outwardly hes just smirking and being weird again (affectionate)

A/N: it was extremely hard not to name the sections

Does he know?

What the Legato Doin?

WE ARE SO BACK

whew i have an atmosphere to keep

Edit: proofread and edited 😙✌️

#legato and i should kiss #legato bluesummers #ridiculous men x reader lol #legato x you #legato bluesummers x reader #legato x reader #legato trigun #trigun #trigun stampede #comfort #fluff

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