#my roommates are so cold and distant with me for no good reason :'(

[ruralcat]

waaahh

#i think ill have to find a 1bedroom or somethin here soon #im really sad about it because i try my best but its getting really tough and uncomfortable #and i really like living with people like im not meant to be alone but this is not working out for me #my roommates are so cold and distant with me for no good reason :'( #and ive been moved out since 19 and its been an insane struggle ever since #real down about it rn :'(

[simpforboys]

in for the long haul

xavier x fem!addams!reader

summary: you’re the daughter of fester and attend nevermore. xavier tries to fight for your heart no matter how long it may take.

warnings: kinda angsty, fluff ending, reader is goth (just like me fr), swear words, xavier is such a simp

works for both blood related or adopted daughter (whatever your imagination desires) as there’s no physical descriptions

IM SO PROUD OF THIS PLS

ever since your father had been keeping a low profile, you had been staying with your aunt morticia and uncle gomez.

your father knew it would be the best option for you. hanging out with your cousins, pugsley and wednesday, should be fun, right?

but after too many troubles with wednesday, morticia decided to send you both to nevermore academy.

wednesday had taken a strong hatred for the place from the beginning. you, however, were beginning to warm up to it. you would never admit it, but you secretly liked your black and white uniform you and wednesday received.

you began to except friendships (unlike your cousin). a vampire named hera was your roommate and probably your closest friend, other than wednesday’s roommate, enid.

but out of everyone in the school, one person specifically stood out to you. xavier thorpe.

you didn’t know why he had taken such a strong liking to you. he made efforts to be around you, make you feel included, and try to see you smile.

so, as you sat in thornhill’s class, you tried to keep your eyes open as she taught on and on and on about specific types of plants.

xavier could feel your boredom from his desk a few seats away. he grabbed a sheet of paper and pencil and began doodling on the white sheet.

you were so zoned out you almost didn’t feel the little tap on your ankle. you looked down the table to find a black rabbit that appeared to be alive, straight out of a drawing.

you looked up at xavier threw your eyelashes. your cold, empty, dead stare was enough to almost make him feel scared.

you were about to reach down to the rabbit when thing crawled down your leg, squishing the rabbit out of existence by accident.

you watched thing’s embarrassment as he crawled into your backpack and zipped it up after him.

you couldn’t help but feel the end of your lips twist into a grin as you looked away. it wasn’t that you didn’t like xavier, you just believed you can spend your time elsewhere instead of taking the risk of heartbreak.

you watched your father’s sanity slowly decrease after the loss of your mother. maybe that’s a reason for his quirky behavior, but the concept of being so in love that it makes you lose all sense of your mind was something you couldn’t comprehend.

why risk everything for one person?

sure, you had your uncle gomez and aunt morticia as an example of sickening love. the way your uncle admired your aunt in such a way, it made you question love.

why is love so good to others, but can be so cruel at the same time?

➽─────────────────❥

after class, you began to walk down to the courtyard when you heard someone jogging behind you. rain was pouring from the sky.

“y/n,” xavier called out.

you stopped dead in your tracks, looking up at him through your wet eyelashes. “what?”

“where are you going?” he questioned as you continued to move.

“dunno. maybe i’ll go find something interesting to distract me from the world.”

“are you excited for outreach day?”

“excited for extended labor during a saturday in a little town that doesn’t like us? not exactly how i like to spend my weekends.”

xavier stared at you. sometimes he couldn’t figure out why you were so closed off, so private, so distant.

but he couldn’t lie and say it didn’t intrigue him. when xavier first saw you on campus, he was immediately interested. your beautiful looks (and the fact you and wednesday had little to no color on) captivated him. he needed to know you.

“well, i’m going to the library if you want to come with.”

you watched as xavier licked his lips. you pondered for a moment.

“fine.”

his lips curled into a grin.

the two of you walked to the library. a comfortable silence was between you too, and you could tell he was nervous.

xavier held the door open for you as you entered the library. you immediately walked over to the giant window that overlooked the rain and the small town of jericho.

xavier pulled out a chair across from you. he noticed you watching the rain.

“i like this weather. rain makes me feel good.”

“it’s so… gloomy.” xavier argued.

“look at who you’re talking to,” you joked.

xavier laughed. it was very rare you showed your sense of humor.

“there’s just something about clouds and rain to me. something very… gloomy.”

you referred to xavier’s previous statement. you could see his blush and you couldn’t help but smile at him.

and xavier swore he fell harder.

➽─────────────────❥

you and wednesday stood side by side as principal weems went around with a hat. outreach day had finally arrived.

wednesday reached in and you followed. “what’d you get?” she questioned.

“the weathervane. you?”

“i don’t know what shop this is. but i need to get into pilgrim world.”

wednesday had briefly explained to you about the case she’s trying to solve as well as her novel. you chose to try to ignore her antics because you knew how hyper-fixed she gets on things.

but if she needed you, you would be there in a heartbeat.

“tyler works at the weathervane.” wednesday added.

“the boy who’s in love with you?” you questioned your cousin. wednesday stared at you as you both began to walk to the bus.

“unfortunately. it’s quite frightening how much he likes me. same with xavier for you.”

“understood. i just hope today goes by very quickly.”

➽─────────────────❥

when you entered the weathervane, tyler was there happily to introduce you to his work. “wow, you are very similar to wednesday.” he commented.

“we’re cousins. why are we waiting?” you asked, noticing he hadn’t made any move to start.

“waiting on one more person to show up- there he is.”

you turned your head to see xavier walking in. great.

“y/n?” he stared at you.

“unfortunately.”

“alright, let’s get started.”

tyler gave you guys aprons and then walked you through drinks, taking orders, and normal café stuff.

“y/n, go take your first order.” tyler instructed as he handed you a notepad and pen.

you walked over to an old married couple. when they saw your cold face and dead-looking eyes they jumped.

“what do you want?” you asked.

“actually, i think we’re going to head out.” the old woman motioned for her husband to exit the booth.

xavier couldn’t help but start laughing as you walked back over to them. tyler was shaking his head.

“that’s the opposite of what we want to do, y/n. xavier, you try.”

you both watched as xavier walked over to a group of girls. you didn’t hear what they said, but the way they were giggling as he spoke made you feel sick to your stomach. 

you rolled your eyes as you walked over to the pastry case and took a bite of a cookie. 

“y/n- you know what, never mind. just try to be nicer to the customers.” 

when xavier walked back over with a notepad filled with orders, he immediately noticed your cold and blank stature. 

“are you done flirting with those barbies?” 

xavier smirked as he leaned against the counter, eyes locked directly on yours. it made you feel nervous. 

“why? are you jealous, y/n?” he asked. 

“you wish.” you rolled your eyes. 

“don’t worry y/n, you’re the only one i have my heart set out for.” he mumbled, now standing extremely close to you. you couldn’t help but shiver. 

you were about to speak once more when tyler walked back over. “start getting to work, guys.”

xavier watched as you quickly walked away from him. fucking tyler. 

after an hour you, tyler, and xavier decided it would be best for you to make the drinks rather than take orders. you were absolutely miserable seeing the way xavier made every customer laugh and smile. it was like torture, and not the good kind. the worst part was, you didn’t even know where this feeling was coming from. 

it wasn’t until wednesday walked in when you felt like you could finally breathe. “how are you, cousin?” she asked. 

“i feel like crawling into a deep, dark hole until i shrivel up and die. you?”

“lovely. i feel the same. is tyler here?” 

tyler came walking around the corner. wednesday and him walked away from you as you noticed thing crawling towards you. 

“finally, a real person.” you whispered to thing as he signed what’s wrong? on the counter. 

“i wish to go into darkness and never come back out.” you explained to him. 

xavier walked over to the counter and noticed your whispering. he furrowed his brows, looking over to see thing quickly signing to you. 

“how did thing get in here?” xavier asked suddenly. 

both you and thing jumped. thing went to handshake xavier and you swore you felt betrayal. 

➽─────────────────❥

you opted to walk back to nevermore after the incident in the town center, regarding thing and wednesday blowing up the statue of joseph crackstone. 

mostly, you needed to clear your head. what was it about xavier and those girls that made you so angry today? 

unfortunately, you didn’t get too much time to think. xavier had began chasing after you, calling out your name. 

“you okay?” he asked when he finally caught up. 

“i’m wonderful.” you answered shortly as you kept walking. 

“why are you so closed off?” xavier finally asked. 

“why are you so open?” you shot back. 

“i’m trying so hard, y/n. trying so hard to be your friend, maybe even get you to be my girlfriend. but you just keep pushing away.”

“i don’t see a point in dating. love is pointless to me. in 300 years, you wouldn’t be able to remember me. my soul, my existence, my face.”

“so that’s the reason? you’re scared of love?” xavier’s voice got softer as he walked closer to you. you didn’t move away (despite your shaking hands and pounding heart). 

“love can be a really good thing in life, y/n.”

“then why can it also be so cruel?”

“you have to take risks. in order to want, to get, to have something, you have to take a risk.”

he was standing dangerously close to you know. 

“you’ve made me feel something so different these past few months. just please, let me show you how good love can be.”

your breathing was staggered as xavier leaned in, lips barely touching. “can i kiss you, y/n?”

fuck it. 

you connected your lips to his as your hands came up to hold his jaw. he immediately placed his hands on your hips, pulling your body even closer to his. he was so desperate for you. 

and maybe you just now realized how desperate you were for him. 

after a couple moments, you pulled away slightly.

“i can take a risk.” you mumbled against his lips.

you felt him smile against your mouth as he kissed you once again.

#xavier #xavier fluff #xavier x reader #xavier thorpe smut #xavier thorpe x reader #wednesday addams #wednesday #the addams family #percy hynes white #percy #xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe x you #i need him #simpforboys

[daisyvisions]

Not What You Expect - (Jacob Bae)

Summary: You were blessed with the perfect, most angelic roommate you could ever ask for. But is he really the good roommate you think he is?

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: Smut (18+, minors DNI), pervy!roommate Jacob, male masturbation, voyeurism, teasing, p in v sex, breeding, pet names (sweetheart), porn with a plot (me thinks)

A/N: Happy Birthday to my darling girl, @jasminexox5. Thank you for our friendship and being one of the reasons why I go on this site to begin with. You deserve the world, I hope you had a good day 💕

⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆

There’s something strange going on with your roommate. Though you can’t exactly pinpoint what it was, you were feeling uneasy from his current behavior.

It had been a couple of months since you’ve moved into your new shared apartment. You were sadly kicked out by your previous landlord for no apparent reason which led you to desperately looking for a place to temporarily live in until you found a space of your own.

The opportunity came knocking at your door one day over lunch when Sangyeon had mentioned his friend had a spare room and was looking for someone to rent it out as extra cash on the side. And this was how you became roommates with Jacob.

On the first day of moving in, you were honestly just expecting a roommate who might be lazy, loud, probably will bring many girls to his room at night, and just generally be a shitty roommate. But Jacob was the completely opposite.

He would always cook meals for the both of you even if you weren’t eating home that day, asked you if you needed anything from him before he went to sleep, and always did his part of the chores.

He also never made any overly loud noises because he didn’t want to disturb you in any way. Even the way he would talk to you was nothing but genuine despite being naturally quiet most of the time.

Jacob was literally an angel. Not only with his words and mannerisms, but also his looks.

You’re not gonna lie, there have been countless times wherein you accidentally stared a little too long at him while he wasn’t looking. Who wouldn't?

Oh, not to mention his chiseled body too. The way his muscles would stick out of his white shirts, when he would briefly walk out of the shower with nothing but his sweatpants and towel hanging on his shoulder, the way his muscles would flex when he would stretch in the morning or when he was helping you lift something heavy.

And when he’d come back from the gym? You would internally giggle like a school girl. But looks aside, he was literally the most perfect roommate you could’ve asked for… almost too perfect actually.

Which is why you were wondering where this strange behavior was suddenly coming from.

It all started this morning when you two were having breakfast together. Every time you kept talking to him he avoid your gaze, keep the conversation short, and so on.

Even his mood around you seemed more anxious than relaxed. You didn’t even have time to properly say goodbye to him since he practically bolted out of the apartment.

What’s going on with him? you wonder. Was it something I said or did? You try to back track and think of all the possible reasons he could be avoiding you.

You ruled out the thought of him being upset or angry immediately. You lived with him long enough to know what he looks like when he’s displaying these kinds of emotions. This one however… Well, it was something you’ve never seen before.

Think, think, think. Was there something that happened recently that could’ve thrown him off? Your eyebrows knit together as you sit on the couch, leg bouncing frantically as you wonder what could’ve possibly made Jacob become cold and distant towards you this morning.

And then it suddenly hit you… could he have possibly heard you touching yourself last night? Was it a little too loud?

Your eyes widen from the realization. Was he too embarrassed to say anything to you this morning? Were you disturbing his sleep?

Maybe it could’ve been that. Why else would he be avoiding you like the plague? Though you did find it rather strange because this wouldn’t be the first time you might’ve moaned a little loud. Hell, there have been times where you’d hear the faint sound of porn playing on the other side of the wall at night.

But then again, you’d never hear any sound coming from him. God, even when he’s jerking off he’s considerate of his noise to not bother you.

You started to feel bad. He’s been nothing but a good roommate and now you’ve made him feel uncomfortable in his own home. You suddenly get up from the couch and tell yourself that you’ll apologize to him when you come home later at night.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

As you enter the apartment, you shrug off your jacket and shoes before entering the threshold and walked straight to your room. As you start gathering your clothes and almost head to the bathroom to shower, you suddenly hear a faint moan coming from Jacob’s room.

He must be watching porn again, you think to yourself. You walk towards the wall and stick your head against the surface to check if what you were hearing was correct.

“Mmm fuck…” you hear a woman’s voice on the other side of the wall.

“You like that baby? Like me filling you up like this?” you hear Jacob respond.

Oh… OH… There’s someone in his room right now.

Strange… you didn't notice any other pair of shoes by the door when you got home. And usually he would tell you if he was bringing someone over just so you’re not surprised by a random stranger in your home.

You hear the woman’s moan once more, sounding a bit louder than the first time.

“You sound so pretty like that sweetheart…” you hear him groaning.

You felt your cunt clench at nothing from the nickname, the same one that Jacob would use on you every so often. But hearing it this way was even better than you imagined.

You could feel yourself getting wet as you continue to listen to him fuck whoever it was behind this wall, low-key wishing it was you instead.

You were so tempted to touch yourself right now from how hot he sounded, but you couldn’t. Not when you haven’t apologized for last night.

You pushed yourself off the wall and decided to just act normal and continue doing whatever it is you were supposed to do.

As you step out of your room, you hear the woman’s voice moan again. You can’t help but wonder, why does that voice sound so….familiar?

Luckily, Jacob’s door wasn’t entirely shut. This gave you the perfect opportunity to take a quick peep into what’s going on, who the mystery woman was. Before you even get closer to the gap between the door, you hear Jacob groaning once more.

“Y/N…” Your eyes widen.

No… it couldn’t be. Did he just say your name?

Did he accidentally moan your name while fucking someone else?

Did the person in the room coincidentally have the same name as you?

All these questions started filling your head. You needed to find out what the hell was going on right this second or else your mind would never be put to rest from it.

As you slowly peeked through the gap, hoping to see two naked bodies intertwined with one another, you were met with an unexpected sight.

Jacob’s naked body lying down on the bed, his head thrown against his pillows as he vigorously fisted his cock. The sound of his wet slick and breathy moans echoing the room. Oh god, even in this state he looks so angelic.

You stood still, entranced by the whole scene unfolding in front of you. You bit your lower lip, refraining from letting out a soft whimper.

As you kept on watching him, you see his free hand bringing a balled up fabric to his nose as he takes a good whiff from it before putting it in his mouth.

Your jaw drops when you realize the fabric was your panties, the ones that were soaked from your juices the night before.

But it gets worse from here.

You spotted his phone laid out on the bed, the source of where the moans you heard earlier were coming from. Suddenly you heard a voice from the phone, “Give me a sec!”

Oh no… it was your voice on the phone. The moaning you heard earlier were yours.

He was jerking to your underwear, moaning your name, listening to your moans he recorded from last night.

You were so shocked by the discovery, lost in your own thoughts that you didn’t realize Jacob had stopped jerking himself off when he saw you peeping through the door.

He panicked the moment he saw you looking through the door. Internally cursing himself for forgetting to lock it in the first place. He’s not sure where it came from, but a sudden surge of confidence ran through his veins and just said, “fuck it”.

You were startled when the door suddenly swung open and you were greeted by Jacob’s naked heaving chest in front of you and his… incredibly hard cock.

You were frozen to the ground. Unable to move or say anything, You tried to avert your eyes from his figure, but you were entranced by his gaze on you even more.

“I-I can explain…” you stutter. Freaking out that you've just ruined your dynamic by looking like a goddamn pervert watching him jerk off. Your thoughts were suddenly cut off when you felt Jacob’s hands cupped your face and kissed you feverishly.

His lips were soft, just how you thought they’d be. Moving and molding into yours so perfectly. He quickly pulled away before deepening the kiss and looked into your eyes,

“…Do you want this?” he asks.

“W-what?”

“I said, do you want this? Because I want you so bad right now.” he responds.

You nod your head, too impatient to have his lips on you as you attempt to lean forward and kiss him again. He stops you as he firmly grips you in place.

“Words, sweetheart. I need to hear you say it.” His thumb grazing your bottom lip, making you gasp from the roughness of his finger.

“Jacob please…” you whine.

“Please what? I can’t give you what you want if you don’t tell me-”

“Just…Ruin me.”

Those were all the words he needed to hear.

He pulled you by the waist and started kissing you intensely. Every kiss felt like it was placed with care, his lips caressing yours as his hands were quickly trying to strip you down to nothing but your thin-laced underwear.

You felt his hands grab the back of your thighs and instantly pull you up, you legs wrapped around his torso as he carries you to the bed and plops you down.

His body hovers above yours as he dives into your neck and starts painting your skin with kisses and red marks.

His fingers scrunch the wet lace together before pulling them to the side and grabbing your legs, folding them as he puts you in a mating press. His strong arms locking you in so you’d have no way of escaping his grip.

“Been thinking of you like this for so long, sweetheart- fuck” he groans into your mouth as he rolls his hips against you, his aching cock rubbing against your wet cunt.

“Jacob…” you desperately cry out.

“Sorry you had to see me like that sweetheart. I couldn’t help myself-” He whispers, referring to you what happened earlier.

“Every time you touch yourself at night, those skimpy shorts you wear around the house, the way you look at me with those eyes, how pretty your lips are…” he continues as he aligns his hips to push the tip of his cock inside your wet hole, making you both gasp in unison. He rolls his hips, bottoming out inside your velvet walls.

“…Gonna fill you up so much with my cum it’ll ooze out of you for days.” he whispers in your ear as he slams his cock inside you repeatedly with deep strokes.

Fucking you dumb as you mewl from the pleasure of feeling so full of him. The sounds of both your arousals squelching beneath you as you feel his cock going in and out.

His eyes slowly being filled with dark lust you’ve never seen before as you fall deep into his gaze. The angelic Jacob you once knew now replaced by a devilish one in an instant.

“You’ve corrupted me angel… And because of that-” he pauses for a moment as he keeps his gaze on you,

“-I’m going to make you my little cum dump from now on.”

#jacob bae #jacob bae smut #tbz smut #tbz fics #tbz scenarios #tbz hard hours #the boyz drabbles #the boyz hard hours #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fic #the boyz smut #kpop smut #Jacob bae scenarios #the boyz fanfic

[mlove44lh]

Don’t hurt yourself

Chapter 1 - Intuition

Masterlist

Prologue

Warnings: Mention of possible cheating, mention of relationship neglect

Words: 2.372

“I tried to make a home out of you, but doors lead to trap doors, a stairway leads to nothing. Unknown women wander the hallways at night. Where do you go when you go quiet?

It's a cold day, the heater is on, and I’m wearing more layers than necessary, but I’m still getting goosebumps. I might even start chattering my teeth if I gave in to what I'm feeling. But I don't think it's just because of the cold, It's less than 8 degrees outside, but the heater is doing a good job here.

I haven't looked at her in a few minutes, I sit in the chair by the window, and the only view I have is the bustle of the city below me.

“The view of Monaco from this window is beautiful. It's a great location.” I remember that was the first thing I noticed when I stepped here for the first time five years ago.

“Y/n…” The woman stares at me while sitting in her armchair in the middle of the large room. “Why are you avoiding this matter?”

“I'm not avoiding it.” I still don't look at her.

“I think you are. You ran away from me as soon as I mentioned his name. And it's been 10 minutes that you don't even look at me.”

I take a deep breath before taking my stare off Monaco and back to her.

“What do you want me to say?”

“We don't need to talk about it. But every matter we start leads us back to him. Did you notice that?” I can barely look at her. Susan always calmed me down, and that's the reason I started doing the sessions with her. I always enjoyed our conversations. But not today, today I just want this to be over so I can get away from here.

“As it should, he is a very important part of my life.”

“Of course, he's your husband. He is the person quoted by you in every session of ours. But not in the last month.” She wears a friendly half smile, and her hands are resting on top of her crossed legs. She doesn't have her notebook today, which is unusual, but it doesn't bother me, I never like to see her taking notes regarding what I say here anyway.

“Y/n…”

Another 15 minutes and I'm out of here.

“What happened in the last month?”

Her voice comes out almost like I'm underwater. My thoughts are so loud that I can't focus on anything else. I need a few seconds to understand what she just asked me.

A humorless laugh seeps from my vocal cords.

Where could I start? For the part where he completely changed in such a short time? Of how overnight, Lewis was someone else? A cold person, who stopped calling, stopped with the flowers, with all the caress, with the dozens of “I love you” said every day? That I don't look like a wife anymore but more like a roommate? Or maybe I should talk about the times he came home at four in the morning and woke me up when he was almost inside me, desperate for some relief, desperate to release whatever God knows who put it in him? From the reclined car seat or the cheap feminine perfume impregnated in the seat belt. Which of these things should I open up and tell her about now? And how do I do that without feeling like an idiot, without the huge guilt monster that's inside of me creeping out again?

I shrug as I feel my throat burn with the painful memories of the last few weeks.

“Maybe I'm just too insecure. Or dramatic. Or both.” I don't talk to her anymore. My spoken words are more like external thoughts.

Susan doesn't say anything, she looks at me as she waits, and the silence makes me want to talk more and open up.

“He's in one of the worst moments of his career. There's too much going through his head, I know that. I can't freak out thinking he's having an affair just because he is distant, right? It doesn't make any sense. I can't be that cunt.”

“Do you think he's having an affair?”

“No. That's the point. He wouldn't do that. He's too good to do that.”

Susan shifts her position and leans towards me. Her gaze doesn't stray from mine for even a second.

“The real Lewis wouldn't do that or the Lewis you created in your head wouldn't do that?”

I look at her and the confusion is clear on my face.

“What?”

“Don't you think that maybe you put more into him than he gave you? That you created a version of him that doesn't really exist?” My heart is pounding like it's going to jump out of my chest at any second. I want to look away from her, but I can't. I need her to finish her reasoning. I don't want her to think I'm not ready to hear this, so I keep still as I wait for her to continue.

“You've always tended to romanticize things, which is understandable with everything you've been through. But maybe that led you to believe in some things that were almost not there while letting other important things pass right under your nose unnoticed.” Now it's my turn to lean to her. “You told me once that you always dreamed with a fairy tale, and that when he appeared, it showed you that it was all real, with butterflies in your stomach and vows of eternal love, everything as in your biggest dream. You fell head over heels in love with Lewis. So I ask you Y/n, which one wouldn't do that to you? The real Lewis or the one in your imagination?”

I try to assimilate what was said and play her words over and over in my head. For the first few seconds, it sounded almost like a joke, it was so ridiculous. But the tightness in my chest got bigger, and suddenly some things started to make sense.

“Think about it this week.” Susan gets up and walks slowly to the door.

That's the cue, my cue to get up, thank her for the session, and leave this room. But I can't move, I'm still sitting in the chair staring at the Buddha-shaped figurine that rests on her coffee table as if it's going to come to life and tell me what I need to do.

“Y/n.” I feel Susan's hand on my shoulder, and I come out of my trance. I turn to face her. “I didn't mean to say that what you live is a lie. But sometimes we do this kind of thing. We intensify what we feel and put a lot of feelings into things without even realizing it, so we can convince ourselves that something we really want is really happening. But that doesn't take away the shine and beauty of any of it. It doesn't take away the fact that everything you feel is real to you. For everything you tell me here, I'm sure you have a beautiful life with him, and that kind of thing doesn't go away. My job here is just to try to show you the things that are clear around you, what you're going to do with it, no one can tell you. Because no one would know how.”

I continue to look at the woman in front of me for some time. Trying to assimilate everything.

“We're done for today, okay? It was all very intense, and anything we talk about now won't have any effect anymore.” I nodded to her. “I'm going out to take a break, but you can take as long as you want here, Y/n. Take your time. Everything is fine.”

“Thank you.”

I watch Susan leave the room behind me, and as soon as the door slams, I'm back facing the city. I could stay here for hours, but I know I have to move and face what is waiting for me.

I don't even know how long I've been looking out the window, I'm only taken out of my trance when I hear the notification noise coming from my phone. I check the device quickly before getting up and grabbing my purse.

“I'm waiting for you down here ;)”

All the way to the outside of the big building, I feel weak, and numb as if my movements are being commanded by someone else. A thousand worries in my head, until my stare met his. Even though he is the biggest cause of all the chaos in my life at the moment, at the same time, he manages to remain my biggest font of calm.

“You didn't tell me you'd come to pick me up.” We are already very close to each other. There is no need for me to try to get closer because Lewis does not take a second to pull me closer to him.

Lewis join our lips in a quick kiss, and that shocked me. It's been a while since he last showed any interest.

“Where did that come from?”

“Can't I have missed my wife?” I feel uncertain, and I know it shows on my face, he barely looked at me in the morning, and now he acts this way. It is an unfair and single-player game. “I saw that you left your car in the garage, so I deduced that you could use a ride.”

We live two blocks away from here.

I've been walking back for five years now. It's almost like part of my therapy walking down the beach to get home on the way back.

I wish I didn't feel like something was very wrong, but I can't. After these last few days, everything he does sounds suspicious to me. And living that is like a living hell.

I push away any negative thoughts and smile at him. He seals our lips quickly before opening the passenger door. I settle back and take a deep breath before facing him again, who's now sitting next to me.

He's too good to do that.

Not a second after he turns on the car, Lewis takes his hand to my thigh and squeezes it lightly. I look at him who already has his gaze glued to mine. I can't help but smile at him. He let his hand rest on top of my thigh as he takes speed with the vehicle.

“Mercedes will organize a charity dinner on Saturday.”

“Cool. Here in Monaco?” I was already expecting something like that, another day without him, I guess.

“Yes. It will be the usual boredom with investors. But it would be nice if you came with me. Are you up for it?”

I look away from the street and look back at him. There he is, the man I've been looking tirelessly for the last few weeks. All of this is so confusing that suffocates me. Change so much in just a few hours, it's almost scary. But I decide to hold on to this moment and believe that I have my husband back.

“Sure.”

Lewis smiles before removing his hand from my grip and placing it on the steering wheel. I look away from Lewis when I notice the car pull to a stop. Only then do I realize we're at a gas station.

“I'm sorry, I need to fuel up. Otherwise, I don't think we're going to be able to get home.”

“No problem.”

“Do you need something?” He says while opening the door to get out of the car.

“No. I’m good. Thank you.”

He slams the car door, and I watch his figure make his way to the inside of the convenience store.

Maybe it was just a bad phase, and as usual, I tried my best to become something about myself. Thinking about it, everything could have a good explanation.

I'm an emotional person. I tend to overstate all my feelings, and almost always this leads to a bad place, which hurts me. As the masochist that I am.

I have no reason to imagine such a thing. Lewis wouldn't do that to me. I know who I married, and I also know that we've changed and grown together long enough that we can't do that to each other.

Maybe I was too over the top to think and doubt him and my trust in him. Maybe.

I try to turn on my phone screen, but the only thing that comes up is the low battery icon.

I open the glove compartment to look for the charger cable while still looking at the device in my hand, when pulling the white wire, I hear the metal falling on the floor, and only the low sound emitted is enough to make me worry. I close the glove compartment calmly before taking my hand to the floor to pick up the object.

I can identify what it is as soon as I pick up the small object. My stomach drops. I don't remember leaving any jewelry here. I bring the piece to my vision and stare at the small bracelet in my hand. A bracelet that isn't mine.

I snap out of orbit as I stare at the object. There's nothing else around me but me, this ridiculous bracelet, and my wedding ring burning on my ring finger.

No. No. No.

He's too good to do that.

He wouldn't do that to me.

The real Lewis wouldn't do that to me.

#au fanfiction #lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton fluff #lewis hamilton smut #lewis hamilton x reader #f1 x reader #fanfiction #smut fanfiction #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #lh44 #spotify #lewis hamilton fanfiction #mercedes amg f1 #fanfic #formula 1 #formula 1 fanfic #formula one #formula one fanfiction

[rcsewcrld]

Hiii, i saw your requests were open, is it okie to get a Rowan Laslow x Fem/afab reader where its a bit like Hurt/comfort how rowan would push away reader who is supposedly his longtime friend so he could continue trying to look for details in the nightshades library about wednesday or just him just being a bit cold to reader, then reader is befriended by Enid, Ajax and Kent or the more popular crowd and once he see reader drifting away from him he decides to apologize (feel free to decide the ending! no rush)

𝐈𝐆𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐓 | rowan laslow x f!reader | 1.5k words contents - fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, friends to lovers rowan laslow x reader (platonic, can be viewed as romantic), enid sinclair+ajax petropolus+bianca barclay+xavier thorpe+yoko tanaka etc x reader (platonic)

tysm for requesting! it means a lot, i hope this isn't bad lol :)

"Rowan! Wait up!" y/n called to her friend. She'd been friends with him for ages, since they were little kids. However, recently, he'd been completely ignorant of her. Every time she talked to him he seemed to have something better to do, she barely saw him in the hallways. "y/n, I'm running late. Can this wait?" He turned around abruptly, stunning her into silence. There was a moment where she paused before responding hesitantly. "Oh, okay." She nodded. Rowan rushed off somewhere mysterious as y/n sighed. She surveyed her surroundings, hoping to find another one of her friends to hang out with. She'd just had her lunch and, due to Rowan's constant mysterious disappearances, she'd felt quite lonely recently.

"y/n! Over here!" The girl whipped around at the familiar voice of Xavier Thorpe. He'd noticed his roommate's strange, basket case of emotions as of late, making a mental note to check on y/n because he knew they were close. She smiled and made her way over to where he was sitting with the 'popular' group of Nevermore. They were all friendly with y/n, so she didn't feel uncomfortable. "Oh, hey y/n!" Ajax's bubbly voice welcomed her. She took a seat between Xavier and Ajax. "Are you okay? You look a little..." Bianca motioned to her own face, implying that y/n was adorning an expression of discomfort. She sighed, "Rowan's been so strange recently. Every time I ask him to hang out he's not free and he's always disappearing somewhere mysterious. Has he been in your dorm much, Xav?" She turned to her artistic friend.

The boy shook his head, "Not recently. He's been distant with me, too. I'm sure he's fine. There's no reason I can think of why he's acting like this." He smiled reassuringly.

y/n wasn't so sure.

-

"Rowan!" y/n didn't miss the obvious sigh that her best friend let out when he heard her voice calling his name. "What now?!" He exclaimed, louder than he intended. The girl took a step back, "I'm sorry. I just wanted to know if you wanted to hang out. We can watch Harry Potter like old times? Or we can just go prank Xavier... or something... I just feel like I haven't spoken to you in so long, you know? You're my best friend and I've missed you." "God, you really have no idea, do you?" Rowan groaned, his fingers moving to his temples in frustration. y/n huffed, "What?" "You're so fucking annoying. Don't you know how to give people space? God, you're insufferable. No I don't want to hang out with you, haven't you noticed?" The girl's mouth opened and closed like a goldfish before she rushed off, tears pricking at her eyes. How could he say something like that, she thought. In the process of running back to her dorm, head down in order to avoid eye contact with any passers-by, she bumped into someone. Typical, now she had to talk to someone.

"Woah, I'm sorry- Wait, y/n?" She looked up to see Enid Sinclair, a fellow member of Ophelia Hall and a good friend of hers. "Hi, Enid. Look, I've really gotta get going." She attempted to brush past her friend without any further conversation, but Enid had other ideas. "Are you alright?" Enid dipped her head down in an attempt to make eye contact with her friend. Eventually, after a moment of comfortable silence, y/n lifted her head and let a few tears slip down her cheeks. "Oh, honey, what happened?" "Rowan was- was really mean to me and it's not like him and he's been like this for days and I just miss how- how we used to be." y/n managed to blubber. Enid pulled her into a hug. "Wanna go back to my dorm? We were all gonna meet up there and hang out. We'd love to have you join us." Enid offered. y/n just nodded and let Enid guide her to herself and Wednesday's dorm by her shoulder. As the door creaked open, y/n was dreading the amount of questions she was bound to face from her friends. Ajax grinned upon Enid's arrival, "Hi, Enid! Oh- oh and y/n..." He trailed off, noticing the sniffling girl being shepherded by Enid.

"y/n? Are you okay? Let's sit you down and we can talk it out." Yoko patted the spot next to her on Enid's bed. All of her favourite people from Nevermore seemed to be there. Ajax, Xavier, Kent, Yoko, Bianca, and Divina were there. Along with Enid, of course. y/n sat herself next to Yoko and snuggled into her side. Kent started, "If you don't mind telling us, what happened?" "I tried to ask Rowan to hang out with me. Do some stuff we used to do like... watch Harry Potter and prank Xavier," She started with a slight smile at Xavier who offered a reassuring one back, "but then he- he shut me down. Said that I was 'insufferable' and that he didn't want to hang out with me." The group shared irritated looks. For the past couple of months... maybe even the last year, Rowan had become a ball of anger, a picture of nothing but frustration and self-pity. They'd noticed his poor treatment of y/n and Xavier had told them about his frequent disappearances and arguments with him. They often ended up with Xavier being thrown against a wall at the hands of Rowan's telekinesis. Bianca shifted in her seat at the end of Enid's bed, "I'm sure he'll notice how upset he's made you. You two are two peas in a pod, I'm sure you'll be back to normal in no time. It's only been a few weeks since your last little escapade together. I'm sure you'll be fine. Just ignore him for the time being." y/n glanced up at the siren, nodding.

"Now, who wants to forget about shitty friends and eat some ice cream?" Divina smirked, pulling a few tubs and spoons out of a cooler that y/n hadn't noticed earlier.

-

It was lunchtime of the next day, y/n was sitting with Kent, Ajax and Enid in the quad. Ajax snickered, "And then guess what he did, he literally-" He cut himself off, spotting a certain someone approaching. Kent, Enid and y/n looked up in confusion. "y/n. I'm finally free to hang out today, if you want to." Enid scoffed, "The audacity," she mumbled under her breath. Rowan furrowed his brows at the lack of response from his best friend. y/n turned her head away, the rest of the group glaring daggers his way. Rowan took that as his opportunity to turn and walk away. What've I done? Rowan thought. Oh shit. He remembered. God, he needed to apologise. He raced straight back to the group. "y/n, I need to talk to you." He begged. She sighed, getting up reluctantly and following him to a quiet corner in the corridors. "I'm really sorry. I'm sorry for how I've been acting for the past few weeks, I'm sorry for how I've treated you and I'm sorry for the words that I said to you yesterday. I really shouldn't have said that. You know I didn't mean it, right?" He blurted. "I know, I know. It's just hard, y'know. I've been friends with you for so long and to have you drift like that was so weird. And for you to say that, I'll be honest it really upset me. Why are you acting the way you are?" She interrogated.

"I've just found some new stuff and I've been figuring this thing out. You know how my mom was a powerful Seer? Well, before she died she showed me a drawing that she'd done and told me to get rid of the girl in it if she ever turned up at Nevermore. The girl was Wednesday, y/n. You can't tell anyone about this. I don't know much at the moment but I'm figuring it out. You can't get involved, either, you'll be in too much danger. Just keep your distance from Addams for now, I don't know if I trust her. Especially not if this drawing was done 20 years ago." He confessed. y/n was apprehensive, but pulled him down into a hug, nevertheless. "Thank you, thank you, thank you." He squeezed her tight, before releasing her. "Never ever ignore me again, okay? Just tell me. You know that I wouldn't tell anyone. Anyway... wanna come hang out with the others? I know you've missed Xavier almost as much as you missed me." She giggled. Rowan rolled his eyes and followed her back into the Quad.

"All good?" Ajax gave Rowan a threatening once over as the pair took their seats. "All good." y/n nodded, smiling harder than she had in weeks.

"They better stay that way, Laslow." Enid threatened, forcing her claws to come out, playfully of course. Although, Rowan's eyes did widen slightly. "She doesn't mean it, dumbass." y/n laughed. Enid giggled back, "Or do I?"

a/n: thank you so much for reading! I hope that wasn't too shitty, I couldn't make it too long because I had no other ideas to put in and it's my first proper imagine, so... hope you enjoyed :))

#wednesday x reader #wednesday characters x reader #rowan laslow x reader #rowan laslow angst #rowan laslow fluff #rowan laslow imagine #ajax petropolus x reader #enid sinclair x reader #yoko tanaka x reader #bianca barclay x reader #xavier thorpe x reader #wednesday masterlist #ajax petropolus imagine #enid sinclair imagine #yoko tanaka imagine #bianca barclay imagine #xavier thorpe imagine #wednesday imagine #wednesday imagines

[theficblog]

But history major renjun gives me goosebumos fr, he'd be so cold amd distant at first but then he's just so damn sweet mark would think i have a crush on him tbh

And TAKE THIS CHESS CHAMPION CHENLE SLASH ACADEMY STAR VIOLINIST AND CELLOIST

Ur roommate is just as cool as mine

And why would haechan be jealous? 🤨 i'd probably wouldnt even bat am eye at business major haechan 🙄

i was setting you up with mark but renjun seems fair too yeah, he is capable, people would be in his room the night before any test because he knows it all, like you never know he could solve physics paper just cos he was bored. the campus cats only come to him, the librarian is nice to him, the cafe owner gives him discounts too. those who are not close him are scared of him, just as you said

chenle would be my boyfriend would be the type to organize zoom study sessions only show everybody pictures of his dogs and talk about the most random thing ever, he would laugh in a very uncultured way at like 4 am for no reason at all, he would never be stressed but pass with good grades

no cos haechan and you would always fight only to end up together by the end of the year too. like yeah. we know. NO WAIT WHY WOULD HAECHAN DATE HIMSELF?!

#ash #im friends with haechan im on my way to be famous #ash&bae's nct college au

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: Hi! I am an ISFP and I have a girl who is on my floor who is an INTP. We have talked a few times and hung out once or twice, but were never close. All of a sudden, she acts like we are best friends. Everytime she sees me she hugs and follows me, and she randomly comes into my room very often without asking me. When she does, she touches everything in me and my roommates room because she said she wishes she had our room, and she sits on my roommates bed with shoes on and touches her stuff even though I tell her to not do so and express uncomfortableness.

The girl spends a long time in our room and I can’t have her leave until there’s a situation where she’s forced to. Internally, I get really agitated and annoyed each time, especially because I don’t get along too well with her, but I don’t know how to tell her. I’ve been trying to be distant and show discomfort, but I don’t think anything changes.

She recently saw and followed me and my friend into my room, where she proceeded to do what she usually does. After she left to get something, my friend and roommate who came (i told her the girl was on her bed + other things she did) were complaining, and we all expressed that we were upset. I think she might have heard us, because the next times me or my roommate or friend saw her she didn’t say anything and looked away.

Hours later, she texted me that she knew I was annoyed with her and apologized. She only texted me though, and not my roommate or friend. However, I am worried that if I respond and say it’s okay, she will continue and/or want to be close friend. I feel really bad because I don’t know if I would fare well in a friendship. I was told that she’s really clingy but also mean/cold to people that “get on her bad side.” What should I do? I see her often because she is in my dorm. Thank you so much.

-------------------------

Reflect and figure out what is stopping you from doing what you know is the right thing to do.

- Is it because you fear hurting her? What about the ways in which she hurts you, e.g., by not respecting your needs, your space, and your boundaries? If she were just a shy/awkward person with poor social skills, then it would be understandable to be empathetic and grant her some leeway. However, she has continually shown a disregard for you, completely ignoring your requests to change problematic behavior. You don't owe her anything. You don't experience any benefits but only drawbacks from being in a relationship with her. You have every right to choose your friends, don't you?

- Is it because you fear negative ramifications? Does she have the inclination and power to make your life difficult? If there's no tangible threat, there's no reason to worry. If she does go out of her way to hurt people, what do you think she would do? Has she done things in the past that indicate a pattern of retaliatory behavior? Sizing up the threat properly would allow you to plan or prepare yourself better.

- Is it because you fear being disliked? If so, it's your problem to resolve. Do you really want to spend your life trying to please and appease people all the time, unable to handle any kind of negativity? You have to accept the reality that you can't be friends with everyone.

Everyone's got their own way of interpreting things and they sometimes misinterpret situations due to irrational hangups and triggers. You're not responsible for anyone's hangups and triggers except your own. Obviously, it's not good to purposely aggravate people. However, if someone is determined to dislike you for spurious reasons, it's out of your hands. All you can do is behave ethically and let go of the things you can't control. Try your best to not be mean, but remember that there is no way to communicate such that you never offend anyone. Miscommunications happen and it's up to you to handle them gracefully.

You could leave things as they are now, let the feelings die out, with no further communication other than what is demanded by civility. You could speak calmly and straightforwardly about how the relationship isn't working for you, giving reasons such as how you have nothing in common or how her behavior doesn't align with your needs and boundaries, etc.

People naturally come together and move apart for a variety of reasons. To have good communication skills means that you don't blow things out of proportion or get drawn into melodrama. If necessary, work on your communication skills, see the article on Communicating through Conflicts.

#isfp #isfp relationships #communication #ask

[null-siren]

Character questionnaire from here. I don't think I've done any of these for this guy. Time to change that :)

do you like your name ? do you know its origins ? if you chose your name, what made you choose it ? if you didn't choose it, would you change it if you could ?

〚 I am indifferent. A name is but a name. As for its origins--at least in my particular case, when I was born I appeared to be a skeleton, taking after some distant relative on my mother's side. My parents therefore named me after a font so that I might fit in; however, everything else grew in just prior to me reaching my teens. 〛

〚 ... 〛

〚 As for my father, he was a ghast. They made my name a pun. It is terrible. 〛

how many pillows do you sleep with ? do you prefer to sleep with a cold pillow or a warm pillow ?

〚 When sleep was a necessity, one. Warm pillow. It was self-heating. Sometimes I miss it. 〛

do you believe in having luck, or is it just chance ?

〚 I have, on occasion and upon successfully completing one of my devices, seen a LCK stat. It does not appear in every universe, however; those I suppose would be ruled by chance. 〛

do you still pick up coins if they're face-down / positioned for bad luck ?

〚 I have no need for currency, so I do not pick them up regardless of their upside face. 〛

if you were offered free food / a free drink, but you didn't like what was being offered, would you still take it because it's free ?

〚 I would accept it if only to be polite. 〛

what kind of milk do you prefer to drink, if you drink milk ? 2% / low fat / almond / oat / etc ? is there a reason behind that preference ?

〚 I have never had milk of any sort. 〛

if you were to hold someone's hand while walking ( assuming you are okay with holding hands ) , how would you hold their hand ? loosely or tightly ? your whole hand, or just a few fingers ? would you swing your arms together as you walk ?

〚 Loosely. Whole hand. No swinging unless the other party was wont to do so. 〛

if you like swimming, do you prefer swimming in freshwater, saltwater, or in a pool ?

〚 I have never been preferential to swimming. 〛

do you have a process for washing your hair, or do you not care ?

〚 I do not have hair. 〛

are you good at puzzles ? do you enjoy puzzles ? do you prefer word puzzles or visual puzzles ?

〚 I enjoy a good puzzle of any type. While I fancy myself quite good at them, if it can stump me: wonderful. 〛

do you have a favourite genre of music ? do you enjoy listening to music ? do you listen to music to get your energy up or exercise ? do you listen to music to calm down or go to sleep ?

〚 I liked to play classical music in the laboratory, but I would switch it to seasonal music when the times came to do so much to the chagrin of some of my assistants. It was always a mixture of what had fallen from the Surface and what was produced by Monsterkind. These days, it can be a good diversion for wandering thought processes. 〛

do you like going on vacation ? where do you like to go ? what would your dream vacation be ? would you go alone, or with friends or family ?

〚 When such things as vacations were relevant, I stayed within Hotland. My dream vacation was somewhere very warm, with few friends, such as my favored assistants. 〛

would you rather have a roommate or live alone ?

〚 A Roommate of like mind would be wonderful. Unfortunately, my Room will not go anywhere if it is not just me. 〛

are you better at giving advice or receiving it ? are you good at helping people through problems ? are you good at working through your own problems ?

〚 What a tricky series of questions. I am better at giving than receiving advice - I will admit that I am stubborn. I can be good at assisting people through their problems, but it is not out of their self-interest but my own. My own problems are forever in progress. 〛

do you have a green thumb, or do you stay away from plants ?

〚 There are reasons why I left experiments upon flora to Alphys and whoever else wished to pursue those endeavors. No matter how meticulously I measured the plant food, water, and artificial sunlight exposure, they would die. 〛

#Muse Studies #I won't be doing these for the secret and not so secret options cuz I'm lazy

[mean-hare]

my stupid ed diary (mhwnbcb) , part 7 (november)

november, 1 we met with my friend masha and the 7 cats we had to transit to prague. they are going to their new homes. train was cool. in poland they checked our cats for a very fuckin long and we missed our train. so fuckin long.staying in train station at night, with cat cages and things, there was tiles and desperation.

november, 2 we stayed in almost empty hotel (liminal vibes). kitties were out of cages, running in room. we spent free time in a hotel cafe, it was tiring and boring. i ate maybe too much. masha talked on a phone all the time. i felt uncomfy. we waited on a station for so long. we was so cold. train was late for a hour. we didnt get any compensation for tickets on train that didnt wait for us yesterday. masha hates poland and it seems reasonable (i still like poland for kurwa tram and word "popierdolone" but today and yesterday was real shit)

november, 3 we came to prague at early morning. people who met us was one girl (i thought that she doesnt like me but i really may be wrong) who take most of cats and paulo (mashs and now my roommate). i know him for two years. now he have shaggy bleached mullet haircut with few blue tips, it looks like smoke on dryed fields. they felt very close to each other and very distant to me so i was sad. paulo decide to cheer me up and asked "will you be happy if suddenly there will be unicorn fallen from the sky and crashed on earth with all the rainbows, blood, guts (and so on with his vivid gorey imagination). it made me laught. they bought me an energy drink called rockstar. also i ate spicy chips. finally theres always avalible spicy chip, unlike in ukraine.

november, 4 we live on 6th floor (it would be called 7th in ukraine). i have a place on matress near the window. theres two big chubby cats called olivka (white with brown) and jackie (full name joconda, fluffy smokey-blackish-greyish-reddish one). theres also kitty called mia (tricolor) who need new home. she is very scared of everything guys gave me cows skull(without horns for unknown reason). i like it. masha bought milk and yogurts for me. i ate one.

november, 5 i unpacked my things. i have not so many with me. paper, few clothes, toys. guys' kitties like my toy dogs

november, 6 we went to the closest market and bought some sweets. wafers. theres so many diffrent kinds. and my fav soya bars. but i didnt eat much today

november, 7 my friends gave me their old sensor phone. we walked the pragues center and i was sad bc they were so close friends and i felt like a burden, unwanted, like i shouldnt be here. but the center was beautiful as always

november, 8 i runned from this house because of neighbour drills (i cant stand it) and lost in this place of similar buildings. paulo found me and after that i spent few hours in cafe runned by deaf people. it called "quite place" but visitors were very fuckin loud. i drank tea and draw my oc (smoking bleached bolognese dogboy called kitty)

november, 9 guys made me go to a psychiatrist. i said them a thousand times that i dont want it and i hate it and i cannot trust any fuckin psychiatrist and wouldnt say anything no matter how "good" one is for them. i did exactly as i said, i didnt say her anything. and now my friends are sad and angry at me.

november, 10 703 calories for some chips. pepsi mango zero. i walked from 8 till 17 but it was not that bad. i was chill. talked with danny online with a phone. draw. watched the underground trains.

november, 11 guys bought hair dye. paulos hair is half pink half blue now. i dyed my hair too but im stoopid. so my hair is not really dyed. just few blue, pink and lilac bangs.

november, 12 me and masha walked a little. there was a thick fog, unusual here, beautiful weather. paulo slept all day. the rest of my day was stupid (bc i ate too many shitty wafers)

november, 13 my breakfast is energy drink and sigarete smoke(i do not smoke)

november, 14 i walked for so long. saw so many spaces of this part of city. theres so many empty spaces. i am not used to it.

november, 15 fog. everything in fog. so beautiful and moist. i bought cheap starch chips. ate them on street like a dinner while sitting on bench with word "kurva" written on it. and read some feminist articles on my phone. fine.

november, 16 theres one precious market in strange point near an abandoned night club. this market looks just exactly like some of markets in my dreams. dim, full of unknown packs of food and very calmly liminal. and theres a lot of energy drinks. and very pretty asian woman cashier.

november, 17 chill homeday. i wanted chocolate so bad and ate half of advent calendar my friend bought me week ago. it had small amounts of calories but it feels so fuckin wrong.

november, 18 i walk the streets again. or better to say walk thru supermarkets sometimes buying shit there. i was in 4 of them today. in first one i bought pack of the cheapest (but tasty) chips (all the day long i worried about eating too much and hoping that too many time on the cold streets burned big amounts of calories. its may be true, it was really very fuckin cold, colder than before). and i bought precious zero monster energy in purple (loooveee purpl) can. it was so tasty but i as supersmartass took it from a fridge (there was non-fridge option) and almost freeze while drinking it on streets. then some time in another mall. and some more time on the stairs near our flat. bc guys went on some volunteer job and would be back in hour. later we met in deathmetal bar with some guys. they were talking, i was quite and lonely and sad as always. while waiting the train back we hear and saw a guy who listens to a gabber music. i like it. shitty day but filled with good music. fist snow of this autumn here.

november, 19 im laying on floor, listening to fontaines ds and sneezing (im sick). masha and paulo arguing long and hysterical about cat nicknames (most tumblr users would said that its very important but i wouldnt lie, i find it stupid. and i agree with m that paulos nickname is stupid but i disagree her crying because of it) i ate few pieces of gouda cheese. i didnt eat cheese for so long

november, 20

chill.

i love oliva's habit to come and dig under the blanket and purr. shi likes to spend her time wwith me. kute chonky kity

november, 21 bag of chips, sugarless drink - my usual daily food for eating on street day. i have another fav place to eat and read while eating. its a bench under the roof near some centrum or club idk. one of places wheres dry when it rains

november, 22

today is my bday and i had to spend few hours on cold streets bc of awful drill sounds of neighbors. i bought onion chips with a haloween styled pack and cinnamon zero cola and ate and read one book. and then i felt like i will die. my vision was blurred and dark, i felt nausea and dizzines and awful pain and heat in head and limbs became numb. and ringing in ears. i tried to walk and i realized that its so hard. i walked in a market to warm up but almost fade. i walked out and then lied on a bench. i felt like it becomes easier and felt better. but then some old woman came and started to shame me for lying on a bench so i had to find another place.

now im in our flat, guys greeted me and bought some cake or something idk its laying in a fridge. i have a huge fuck-it mood so today i will eat cake or something, fuck it all, im tired and i need a birthday mood

yeah it was a cheesecake!

november, 23 my days are dull again. i need more party. but theyre dull again.

november, 24 sweet taste of milk didnt erase that gross rotten feeling in my dirty mouth.

november, 25 i ate only one pack of diet joghurt. paulos mom visit us (them). paulo said as a joke "i had said yora that this women is a social worker who came for him" (i asked him before whos that woman). it was an awful joke. he knows about my fears and bad expirienses. i cried. he apologized but it still hurts.

november, 26 i had a mental breakdown or something. i felt isvisible and was so tired. i was loud for the first time of living here. and then i became bad in the eyes of guys, and i realised that i shouldnt be here. i should come back to ukraine. i hate ukraine. i hate czech republic. i hate my life. i have nowhere to go.

november, 27 paulo was high and became willing to help with my loneliness so he made me to register on few dating apps. i was restless bc of energy drinks and sugary things so i made my profiles detailed and almost fancy and swiped away many users who looked like "normal humans" ("normal people scare me" is not a tumblr joke but a real issue for me) it was really tiring

november, 28

good ol' walking thru the malls. and some late night breakdown as i remebber but i cant remember why adn how it was.

november, 29 i bought kinder surprise with discount. i have a little plastic penguin now. i named it ping as one penguin character in german kid book about urmel the dinosaurus. i walked the lonely path between school and big road. i saw there few abandoned shopping carts. children walked in groups their way home or market. they seemed so happy under the twilight skies.

november, 30 now theres a black dog of masha's friend. temporary. noisy shaggy black (his name is black. paulo calls him blacker). he makes funny sniffing sound when i eat wafers or chips. its my most common meal now, today its the only meal for day.

#mhwnbcb #disorder eating #male ed

[ichigoromi]

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭 | 𝐈𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐳𝐮𝐦𝐢 𝐇𝐚𝐣𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧 | 𝐇𝐚𝐢𝐤𝐲𝐮𝐮 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧

I was just feeling really sad after reading this bl manhwa, and boi, I broke down.

So, I just wanna write about Iwaizumi.

Pairing: Iwaizumi Hajime (timeskip) x fem reader! (she/her)

Genre (s): angst, comfort

Warning (s): none

Enjoy!

Iwaizumi Hajime

There are days where you just feel like nothing is going the way you wanted.

Or your supervisor is just being an asshole and makes you do his workload on top of your own.

Maybe your colleagues are being backstabbing bastards that took credit for the proposal that you took months to sketch up and meet with multiple clients for.

The apartment you rented was a scam, and you live without a heater in this cold winter.

Your parents are too preoccupied with their youngest daughter's wedding, well almost your whole life, you became nonexistent after she came out.

If life wasn't this shitty, you wouldn't be in front of your ex's apartment.

You and Iwaizumi broke up a month ago due to you not having enough time for him, so you decided to break up because you were hurting him.

You took a deep breath and rang his doorbell.

It has been a month since he last saw you, and you looked like a mess.

"What are you doing here? We broke up already." His tone was cold and blunt, but he was right. You two have broken up, and it was on your own accord, so it would be weird for you to randomly turn up at his apartment.

It used to be your apartment too, but you didn't want to cause him trouble, so you moved out.

"Hajime, I just have a little request. Can you give me a hug? I'll get going after that." You requested with a small, timid voice as if you have no life in your voice anymore.

"No."

He rejected you firmly. Then you noticed the pair of heels by the shoe shelf.

"I see. Thank you." You bowed formally and made your way out of the exit.

---

"Who was that?"

Iwaizumi jumped a little when his best friend and girlfriend, Miki, suddenly sneaked up on him after his little conversation with you.

"Just some saleslady. Nothing much." Oikawa raised a brow at his best friend, and Miki was curious.

It's literally ten at night; what kind of door-to-door salesperson would ring the doorbell, and Iwaizumi Hajime is literally the one to immediately shut the door in their face, not have a little chat with them.

You and Miki remained good friends after your break-up with Iwaizumi, but she never got to know the reason behind the break-up from Iwaizumi.

Oikawa doesn't know about the reason since Iwaizumi's mouth has been kept shut after the break-up. Even with the mention of your name, he would walk out of the room.

But now's the time.

"Iwa-chan, spit the truth. Why did you and y/n-chan break up?"

Iwaizumi knows he can't avoid the topic because Oikawa and Miki, together, nothing can stop them till they get what they want. They want to understand why their good friends would break up this time.

"Fine, I'll tell you guys everything." He let out a sigh and sat down on the floor.

The couple sat up straight, ready to hear everything.

"She said that we were becoming more and more distant as the days went by. Instead of living with my girlfriend, it felt like I was living with a roommate. So, I agreed, and we broke up."

He explained, but Miki exploded instead, knowing your side of the story.

She was upset at you for not explaining your own struggles to your own boyfriend and causing him to be misunderstood.

"No! Iwa-chan, it's because she's going through a slump! Her working environment is so toxic, and when the proposal for that major project that she has been working on for months got snatched under her nose, you were complaining about how she wasn't spending time with you.

And you know about her family situation! Imagine how her parents repeatedly put her down because she is still not getting married at her age while her younger sister pleases her parents without doing anything.

I'm not pressuring you to marry her or anything. I'm just asking you, Iwaizumi-san, did you ever ask your girlfriend if she was okay? Or even check up on her?

Do you even love her?"

Miki's words were like a slap to harsh reality.

While he was always complaining about his work and talking about himself, did he even bother asking if you were okay? Even once?

"I-I need to do something." Iwaizumi got his keys, phone and wallet and rushed out of his apartment.

Oikawa saw his girlfriend in a new light today.

Never piss her off, and you're good.

---

Somehow you ended up on Rainbow Bridge. You leaned your arms against the railing and took a deep breath.

It will be alright, tomorrow is a new day.

It's going to be different.

It's...not going to be okay.

You knew it was stupid to go back to your ex-boyfriend, but there was a small glimpse of hope that he might be able to comfort you.

The winter night feels surprisingly refreshing by the river and freshens you up.

"I...I knew it." Iwaizumi was panting, still trying to catch his breath.

He went to all the places he knew and got to the last place on his list, and luckily you were there.

"Hajime? What are you doing here?"

Without even answering your question, he pulls you into his arms. Being back in his arms, you instantly broke down. He lets your tears soak through his shirt, but his hand was continuously patting your back.

"I'm sorry that I never consider your feelings back then. I didn't know you were going through a hard time. I'm really sorry, baby."

You finally lifted your head up to see him through your watery eyes.

"I didn't want to be a burden to you. I...I thought I could go handle this myself..." You bit your lips, trying to prevent yourself from crying again.

Iwaizumi wipes the lone tears away from your cheeks with his thumb and leans down to capture your lips with his.

But you pushed him away.

"Aren't you dating someone? There was a pair of heels at your apartment. Iwaizumi, I may love you, but I don't want to be-" He pulls you in for another kiss, you punch his chest, trying to get him to pull away.

"That was Miki's heels. Oikawa and Miki are here for a visit."

Oh.

OH.

Your best friend mentioned that she was coming to Japan for a visit, but because of what's happening in your work, you totally forgot.

"Now, shall we reinstate our relationship? We have to set new rules too, to prevent something like that from happening again." He smiles widely at you.

"Sure, I would like that too."

---

After talking through with your boyfriend, you moved back in with him.

And you quit your job.

With Iwaizumi's connections, he managed to hook you up with another job with his senior, and you love the company's environment.

"Babe, I'm home!"

You rushed to the front door, wearing the apron and still in your work clothes.

"Welcome back!" You greet your boyfriend with a big fat kiss on his lips.

Now, you two were going stronger than ever and maybe looking into some wedding avenues...for the future.

This was a wild ride of an emotional roller coaster! Anyways, I hope y'all enjoyed this! Thank you for reading!

Stay safe and healthy!

With love,

Rosalie🍓

#iwaizumi hajime #iwaizumi headcanons #iwaizumi hcs #haikyuu iwaizumi #iwaizumi drabble #iwaizumi imagine #iwaizumi scenarios #iwaizumi angst #iwaizumi fluff #iwaizumi x female reader #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi x y/n #iwaizumi x you #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x reader

[provisionalsparkle]

The Boy Next Door

Reader x Bang Chan (Stray Kids)

[Genre] exes-to-lovers au, smut, angst.

[Word count] 6.7K

[Warnings] Smut. Angst. Unprotected sex, voyeurism, ample description of bodily fluids.

[Note] This is my contribution to @feliix ’s Summer 2 Lovers collab! Check it out!

Summer.

The season of fun and sun, careless joy, long days and warm nights…

For most people.

For you, this summer is about change. It’s about the little town you used to live in, the quaint house you grew up in, the smell of your mother’s cooking or the breeze from the yard, the sound of younger kids playing in the street. It’s about the big city you will go to live in, it’s purple and orange twilight skies, black silhouettes reaching toward the skies beginning to twinkle with golden lights, the noises of the traffic coming from evening bustle, the scent of the delis and restaurants that line the streets.

You were stuck between these two places, university having been a four year long limbo of boundless sex mislabeled as self-discovery, and now visit your home one last time, reminding yourself of the life you had there before moving on to another.

You think of the past with nostalgia, yet also with a restlessness that makes you want to run from everything. The stillness, the silence, the unchanging landscape in this little town is too unbearable, too unsettling. But it’s familiar, and it’s comfortable. The life you’ll soon live promises excitement, autonomy, it’s the adulthood you’ve fantasized about. It terrifies you too, and you have these horrible dreams about missing the payment of the most insignificant bill and having the entire world collapse on you because of it. You still don’t know how to do your taxes.

College is over, a new life awaits you in a big city after landing a rather ideal job, but it felt like you were leaving things behind. Funny how, after so many years of fantasizing about this grown-up life you suddenly felt like a lost child, scared to forgo the familiar.

It’s these sort of almost-quarter-life-crisis thoughts that fill your mind on a particularly warm afternoon. You’re indecently splayed out on a couch with as little clothing as possible, the door to the backyard is wide open, letting an occasional breeze waft in to disrupt the stifling stillness of the heat. The lights are off, and you were too unbothered to turn them on as the sun set, preferring to stare at a darkening ceiling as the evening sky turned purple.

There’s a familiar jingle of keys from the front door.

“Honey? You home?”

“I’m here, Mom.” You lazily answer back. She wanders from the hall to the living room, you can feel the judgemental look she gives you.

“Have you been laying like this all day?”, indignation lines her voice. Was it so surprising to find you like this?

“Yeah…”

“You can’t just lay here all day. Go out! Get some sun! Go play with those kids you used to hang out with from school!”

“I can’t Ma, I’d rather just plank here.”

“Oh goodness, Y/n. Give me one good reason you shouldn’t go hang out with them!”

“I’ll give you two: either they grew up to be total bitches or they had kids and became a bore.”

“I didn’t become a bore when I had you!” She exclaims, although it’s not too serious and some playfulness hides beneath the surface.

“Yeah, that’s because you’re a cool mom. They don’t make those anymore.”

“Hmm… well, I think you should make a bit of an effort.”

“Mom… it’s my last vacation you know -”

“You know what?!” She suddenly exclaims, her voice brightening like a lightbulb just radiated in her thoughts. “Mrs. Carson’s son is here with her for the summer too! I bet you haven’t seen him in ages, and he’s gotten so handsome.”

“Mrs. Carson?” You didn’t have any clue who that was.

“Well… you might remember her as Mrs. Bang, but Jane changed her name when she married Norbert a few years ago. She still lives next door and Christopher’s in town spending the summer with his mother.”

Bang…

Christopher…

You hadn’t heard that name in years. It surprised you a bit actually, and a hint of a smile came to your lips.

“Yeah, yeah, Mom… I’ll think about it.”

You wouldn’t admit… something did grab your attention. A curiosity of sorts.

You were fifteen years old when you had your first kiss. He was a short boy with a kind smile, a bit awkward really, but you had a fondness for him. It wasn’t about looks at all, all boys at that age were hideous and nothing would change your opinion on that, but you’d swoon whenever you saw him. It was mutual, an icky teenage infatuation that had your friends poking fun at both of you whenever you’d become giddy at the sight of one another. Hot faces, nervous glances, trembling innocent touches.

He sat next to you in chemistry and you’d hold hands under the lab table while the teacher gave class. His left hand always felt soft in your right one. Cute. It’s a bit silly but you’re glad you had that sort of adorable and silly romance. While it lasted, that is.

Christopher wasn’t a bad guy. He was stupid, like all boys that age.

When you saw him kissing another girl, of course you cried, but you knew it had to do with him being stupid more than anything. This simple looking girl that you had been friends with in elementary school, you can’t even remember her name.

You know why he did it, beyond his stupidity. Your mom had let it slip long before - you knew it was coming.

“Honey, would you believe? Mr. and Mrs. Bang are divorcing!” Probably just some hot gossip from one of her PTA yoga groups, no ill intention on your behalf. She didn’t know you were seeing Christopher - over your dead body. You were fifteen and a horrible student, you didn’t need to give your mother yet another element to ground you with.

“Oh no…” You acted as normally as you could, your first thoughts went out to Christopher first though. “Do you know why?”

“Well… I’m obviously not going to ask, duh! But I do know that Mr. Bang is taking the kid with him abroad.” What?! What did she just say? Chis is WHAT?!

“I - uh, what?” Act normal, act normal, act normal.

“Aww… sweetie, was he your friend?” Goodness, parents can be so oblivious, but it’s beneficial in this case. She doesn’t pick up on the depression of your mood.

“I guess.” A sniffle is about to threaten your composure so, in your teenage arrogance, you leave before your mother can see your teary eyes.

The subsequent days were strange. You expected Christopher to tell you the news, you expected to comfort him, you expected to live out the rest of your young romance as best as you could. And then… you saw him.

And he said nothing. He was cold, pushed you away. He must be going through a lot of pain, you thought. More days went by and he still said nothing, and his demeanor grew worse, no affection, no smiles. He must be having a hard time, you reasoned.

Sometimes you thought he was on the verge of saying something to you, like he was about to say something and the words threatened to come out but he’d suddenly pull away and swallow them. You didn’t question it really, it was so confusing but you just went with it.

You never held his hand in chemistry again.

Time made you realize that Christopher didn’t want to be with you anymore. You weren’t sure if it was because he stopped liking you, and that hurt a little, but you knew what he was going through, and you stood by him in case he ever chose to open up and cry on your shoulder. You’d be there for him.

When he kissed that girl, it didn’t really surprise you. Damn it, what was her name? You cried, you thought it was because you were ugly and your boobs were still pretty small - stupid reasons.

It took a few months for you to understand the real reason.

He left without saying goodbye. You never spoke to him after he kissed what’s-her-name. Maybe he tried to do so a couple of times, but you ran away or didn’t let him. Or maybe you remembered it that way to comfort you, just so you’d live with the thought that he tried to apologize, tired to make things right.

But the fact of the matter is he didn’t speak to you and he didn’t say goodbye. He didn’t want to.

He didn’t want to say goodbye because it hurt.

He was trying to ruin your relationship so you’d break up with him and he wouldn’t have to say goodbye, so that he could kill the feelings you had for him to spare you from the pain of his departure.

Or maybe you were just imagining it like that to make it a cuter memory and think about it fondly.

Maybe in the end, Christopher was just a horny teenage boy that cheated on you. Maybe.

Regardless, you giggle as you think back on the silliness of it all, and how serious and life altering it all felt in your childishness. It seemed so long ago, so distant, and you were so changed that it felt like it had all happened to a different person. You wondered about the man next door, and the entirely different boy who had once been next door. What kind of person had Christopher become?

University did you well. It was four solid years of irresponsible drinking and uninhibited sexual exploration paired with relatively easy academics. You don’t know how it happened, but it had been like a transformation from one day to the next.

You, sort of, kind of, absolutely plain and normal girl that no one would notice lest you stepped in their line of sight. One day, there you were - normal.

Two weeks in - boom. Confident. Your roommate was an okayish girl, another plain one. Then you started noticing how comfortable you were undressing in front of her, to change clothes or whatever, as if it was the most normal thing in the world - which it was. Wearing shorts and skirts became less of a worry, just something that felt better. Sometimes you’d be thrown icky glances from some boys, which you hated, but others were acceptably flirty and you loved those. The best ones were the boys that would get shy and who would quickly whip their heads the other way once you caught them staring.

That definitely flipped the switch. It made you feel strong, it made you feel damn good. You, who at the most had dipped a finger into the world of heavy makeouts during high school, now became a seasoned seductress of all kinds of men. So long as you could wrap them around your finger with your demeanor, so long as you could prowl over them and take the lead.

Ah… the good old days.

What was going to happen now, though? Four years later, no slightly inexperienced men left to be wowed. Everyone you knew was turning into a bland and bitter office worker. Was this the end of it?

To think that you’d be ending this glorious chapter of your life in this tiny town, lounging on the same stuffy couch in the same hot living room every day, having your routine philosophical melodrama where you’d stare at the ceiling in the afternoons until your mother came in inquiring if you were alive. It was a terrible fate.

A few days after the revelation of Christopher’s presence, which you would never admit had been circling your mind nonstop, your mother returns with another piece of information.

“You know, Jane and Norbert are having a get together of sorts next Saturday - just the usuals from the block.”

“Is that so?” You said with disinterest.

“In fact, I borrowed a baking pan from her last week… why don’t you go over and give it back to her for me? She might need it, and you probably haven’t left this house in days.” You didn’t reply, but you could feel her eyes on you, waiting for you to obey.

“Fine…”

The afternoon was enjoyably fresh, although your white t-shirt stuck to you like a second skin, the bikini top you wore underneath tracing its silhouette into the cotton. You lazily stomped your way to the house next door, admiring the tall window where you had snuck into Christopher’s room a couple of times during your short romance. A ladder was perched up against the exterior toward that window, they must have been fixing things up. The porch was full of cans of paint, tools, boxes. It was only when you rang on the doorbell, begrudgingly holding the large tray, that you realized that Jane might not be the one to open the door but instead it could be -

The door swings open and you gasp. Christopher.

Well… his face hadn’t changed much. But he was slightly taller than you remembered, far more masculine, oh, and he wasn’t wearing a shirt. Yeah, he was shirtless… jeans hanging low on his hips… shirtless… abs… fit waist… arms…

“Hi! Is Jane home?” Good… pretend you don’t remember him.

“I - Uh… no, my mom’s actually out right now.” He replied. His voice had grown deeper, and where did he get that accent? Wait - did he not remember you? Now, that just made you angry, but you wouldn’t let it show.

“Oh, well… my mother wanted me to return this.” You say handing him the tray, avoiding trailing your eyes downward.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll give it to her.” He says. He seems a little frozen, an expression between surprise and caution lingers on his face, but you don’t know if it’s good or bad.

There’s a moment of silence where you just stare at each other.

“Y/n…” He finally says. There’s hesitation in the way he says your name. He’s scared, not of you, but he’s scared about the fact that you’re on his doorstep.

You don’t say anything, calmly, almost coyly, waiting for him to continue. You’d gotten rather good at pretending you were calm, and the slightest tint of a smile painted your lips so you wouldn’t seem cold or ingenuine.

“Do you remember me?” He asks. You can’t help but huff, a tiny laughter really.

“Of course. You know, you haven’t grown much taller.”

With those slightly playful words, you turn to walk back to your home, and with each step your impression of the encounter with your childhood love became more bitter and less sweet.

It was strange how you thought about him, about it. The situation, that is. Seeing him, talking to him, both of you now being older. A few days of thinking now.

You don’t know why you thought about it so much, but you thought about it. You thought about it without knowing how you felt about it or what you thought about it. This man you had only gotten a glimpse of, too overwhelmed to take in his features properly, now walks around your mind freely. He wasn’t the boy you knew. He wasn’t the boy next door whose hand you’d once hold in chemistry, who you’d kiss before turning the corner towards both of your homes. The boy who left all those years ago.

No, it wasn’t that boy. It was that man, who kept perturbing you. What did you feel? Interest? Yes, there was something quite intriguing about all of this which sparked your curiosity. Lust? Of course, absolutely, the man next door looked divine. Suppose you could abstract the person from his body, so that you wouldn’t be so bothered by who he was and what he meant to you, and you’d easily bend over in front of him and invite him in.

You supposed a conversation was in place, though, because after all, he was still the Christopher. You couldn’t just go around fucking people like that anymore - unfortunately. That was something you got away with in college. It’s a shame college boys grow up to be boring men, sex gets more boring, they think they have all the authority… Maybe you should go back to school.

You’re sitting on the windowsill of your second floor bedroom, one leg hanging out and stepping onto the roof. Opposite to your window, beyond a neat shrub, is the window of the guest room of Mrs. Carson, formerly Bang, which seems unchanged from when you last saw it. You remember watching her from your room, also unchanged, using the TV in there to do some aerobics she followed along from a VHS… was it a VHS? No, that’s the machine. What were the things you used to put in the VHS? A cassette? No… regardless, eventually she must have started using DVD’s.

Damn it, it all seemed like thousands of years ago.

Damn it, you were still so melodramatic throwing around words like poetry over some Richard Simmons tape. Aha! It’s a tape!

Your crotch is being dug into by the window frame, and you let your weight rest on it, the slight grind tempting you to have a round of masturbation. But you’ll finish the cigarette you stole from your mother first. It tasted awful, it was another adult thing you couldn’t understand. Why did everyone at university smoke so much? It was just another thing their eager teenage selves did to emulate the adults in grown-up world, to feel a little more grown-up. Who the hell likes this stuff?

But you liked watching it burn, occasionally inhaling its airy and bitter smoke. It wasn’t your preferred type of smore. You preferred watching papers and matches burn, their sweet and rich smell, the warmth of the fire that would sting the edges of your fingers. Shame your mother only used a lighter, you didn’t like the smell of that fire either.

You just surrendered to watching the bright tip of the cigarette and the white streams that came from it.

“You know those are bad for you.”

“Jesus fucking Christ!” You exclaimed, your heart nearly jumping out from your chest. A man had sprung out from the window in the guest room of the Carson house, formerly Bang, and that man was Christopher Bang himself.

“Sorry I didn’t -”

“You almost gave me a fucking heart attack - what the hell?!”

“ - mean to startle you…”

“Damn it, Christopher!”

“Ah! So you do remember me?” He says with a bit of joy, but you just look at him, realizing that this is where the talk will come. His features grow a little more somber. He continues, “So… I guess I -”

“Where’d you get the accent?” You interrupt, genuinely curious. “You sound like the crocodile hunter.”

“Well… I was living in Australia with my dad.” He says it in a normal tone, but you make sure it doesn’t stay normal.

“Oh, so that’s where you went?” You both wince at what you just said. Yep, it’s finally time for that talk.

There’s a bit of silence, but you’ll let him be the one to fill it.

“I…” He sighs deeply. Uuhh… it’s quite a masculine sigh. “I didn’t know you’d be here. I didn’t think I’d ever see you again but I… there’s something I’ve always wanted to say.”

“I’m listening…” You say. It’s a flat tone, but it’s funny. You hope it’ll ease him.

“I wanted to say I’m sorry.” Some silence again, “I’m sorry for being an ass, I’m sorry for cheating on you -”

“Chris, we were like fifteen… you kissed a girl with braces, big deal.” You waved it off. Really, kissing that girl didn’t bother you so much, now almost ten years later.

“I left without saying anything.”

“Yeah, you did. Hard to not notice.”

“I was - I know it’s not an excuse, but I was going through a lot and I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“So you left without saying anything?”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok… we haven’t spoken in years. I practically forgot about it.” No you didn’t.

“Did you?” He says. Was he hopeful when you insinuated he hadn’t hurt you as much as he thought he had?

“No, not really. I mean, yeah, you kissing another girl was pretty insignificant, we were just kids. It did hurt that you left without… I don’t know… There wasn’t any closure. There wasn’t a goodbye. I felt confused for a while, I guess.”

“I’m so sorry about that. But my parents were splitting up, I was going to have to leave everything behind. You were the first girl I loved and I was going to have to say goodbye and I couldn’t handle it. I was too hurt and embarrassed to even tell my friends. I wish I had done it differently.”

“Yeah, I wish you had too. I wanted to be there for you, you know? I wanted to hug you, hold your hand, tell you it was going to be ok.

“I really messed up there…”

“It’s okay Chris, you were just a kid. We were just kids.” You offer your sympathy but he doesn’t soften.

“Mhmm. Doesn’t make me feel less guilty about it.”

“Can I ask you something?” He nods, “Did you do all that stuff… you know, treat me that way, for real or where you…?”

“I was hoping you’d break up with me, get over me. That way we wouldn’t have to say goodbye and we wouldn’t get hurt.”

“I got hurt.” You admit.

“I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.” You insist. “It’s fine. We’re fine. We’re old and grown and fine. All of that’s in the past, I can’t blame you for acting like a kid. It’s okay.”

“Well I can agree with you there. We did grow up, not kids anymore.”

“You didn’t grow that much.” You laugh, he laughs too.

“You certainly did.” He’s being flirty. It could have been bad timing, but the mood felt right.

“Oh, you noticed?”

“Hard not to.” Goodness was he being direct. “You were really cute back in school, I had a crush on you for like, forever.”

“Really…Plain old me?”

“Really. And now here we are and I think I could have a crush on you all over again.”

“So you can go off and kiss another girl with braces and leave the continent?”

“No, I’m a one woman man.” He says while making himself comfortable on his own ledge. It’s getting comfortable overall, like you’re talking to someone you’ve known for the longest time, like a decade of separation didn’t do much harm.

“Well, well. And who is that lucky woman now?”

“There’s no one at the moment. I’m in the middle of some life changes.”

“Do tell.”

“I’m moving back. Well, not here, just in the country again. A big city, big job, kinda scary.”

“Seems we’re on the same boat. I just came back to say goodbye to this place forever and I’m ooout.”

“Did you finish school already?”

“Yeah… I wish I hadn’t though.” You think back on your experience with longing, lamenting it’s end.

“Wow, can’t relate. I couldn’t wait for it to end. What’d you miss about it?”

“Well, I didn’t have to work, grades were good and easy. And I guess, it was tons of fun.”

“How so?”

“Being on a campus full of horny and stupid guys - it was open game.” Chan hisses at your admission.

“I wouldn’t have taken you for that type.” He chuckles, “You would stutter for like the first two months we went out.”

“We were just kids.”

“I guess we were…”

Another comfortable silence as you stare off at the sky, your cigarette burnt through with only the spongy bud left to pinch.

“Chris?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m single too, you know.”

It might have been a bad idea, you said it on impulse after all, something quite instinctive having taken over you. Maybe you were just horny and Christopher was just hot, regardless, the conversation was over. Before he could even process what you said, and the implications to it, you had already slipped back into your darkened room and out of his sight.

Chan felt like a teenager again. Not in a good way.

Chan remembered your first kiss, holding your hand. He remembered your breasts being the first he had ever really noticed, your legs being the first he ever caressed. He remembers how you’d press your bodies together while you kissed, not really understanding what both of you felt, only understanding the urgency of it.

Now he can name those feelings, the ones that once belonged to an inexperienced boy, merely dipping his toes into the surface of that world. But now that he dove, and had dived into its waters several times, he knew how to swim in them.

Yet, seeing you made him feel like he didn’t. It made him feel like he couldn’t swim, like he couldn’t breathe. He felt like he was drowning.

The first moment he saw you on his doorstep he felt his stomach drop, a pang of guilt that had lingered on his mind during countless of sleepless nights hitting him with full force. He didn’t expect it. He thought he would never see you again.

And after taking another look, a longer look, it was like he was swimming in completely different waters. He felt submerged, and he didn’t know which way was up. He wanted to open his mouth and swallow it all up, let you drown him.

He hadn’t felt this raging feeling since he was a teenager. He certainly hadn’t had a specific woman make him feel like this until you.

It made him feel another kind of guilt. Shame even.

The following days he’d watch you, shamefully. His mother had him painting the house and when he stood on the rooftops he took his time to enjoy the view of you swimming in your pool, wearing tiny bikinis that stuck to your skin and showed the buds of your niples and the lines of your labia through the fabric. He would admit, shamefully, that he stopped watching from the roof because he needed to get closer to see these beautiful details.

He now watched you from over the fence in his backyard. Getting incredibly hard watching you swim, watching you oil your body down.

It was all horribly, horribly shameful.

But weren’t you the one that mentioned you were single? It had caught him off guard. He was being cheeky in that moment, but he didn’t know what waters he was testing then. Now he knew, and it was making him behave so, so shamefully.

Should he go over there, push you into a corner of the pool and pull your bottoms to the side? Should he kneel at your feet while your rubbing yourself with that golden oil, and beg you to let him fuck you?

It wasn’t just the thought of sex that drove him mad, it was you in general. How inferior he felt in front of you, like he had to prove himself. Every day he worked shirtless, hoping you’d get a glimpse of him, but you were just so unbothered by it all.

It was driving him fucking insane.

If only you knew.

Except - of course you did. Of course you did. This is what you craved, what you were best at. Driving boys, technically men but boys sounds tastier, to be absolute slaves to their desire for you. Christopher wasn’t doing a good job at hiding it. Did he really think that you would suddenly spend every day swimming in the tiniest bikinis after having not left your couch for over a week? They really are such stupid, fuckable animals.

And Chris was particularly fuckable.

Day four of his perverted project, he was hammering away at some boards in the back porch of his house. Your mother wouldn’t be home for hours, his parents were away for a couple of days.

Everything was perfect.

“Chris?!” You call loudly over the fence from your chaise lounge, carelessly flipping through a book. The hammering stopped, he had heard you. “Chris, it’s hot today. Don’t you think you should come over for a swim to cool down?”

Why on earth were you acting so damn unbothered and confident, he thought. Why on earth were you asking him over?

It’s only a matter of time before he circles his own house and slides in through the gate on your end. He’s still wearing jeans and a utility belt, gloves too. No shirt.

“You can’t really swim in those, take them off.” You hardly peered at him from over your sunglasses. He was just standing there, frozen. That’s usually a sign that you’re working your magic well. Good. “Come on Christopher, take them off.”

“I - uh, I’m actually not wearing trunks right now. Uhm… I’ll be right back.”

“Oh, you don’t have to go.” Insert unbothered page flip. “Why don’t you just undress and get in the pool so I can join you?”

“W-what?” He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He genuinely thought he had imagined it, maybe all of his hornyness was driving him insane.

“Christopher!” You whine. “You’re ruining the fun!” You slam the book shut and throw it over to the side, taking your sunglasses and hat off. “Chris, I think it’s obvious. Do you think I haven’t noticed you being a peeping tom for the past half week? Look! You’ve already got a tent in your pants and everything!”

“Fuck.” Shit, you were right.

“This is like, hmm, like an open invitation to fuck me.” You say with an eye roll, but your eyes roll toward his abs because they are absolutely distracting you.

“Are… are you serious?”

“Well… You want to, I want to. You’re nice, look like you’ve become quite a decent man - and I’m not just referring to your physique Chris. Maybe, just maybe, it would be an excellent idea if we finally fucked this tension away.”

“Just like that?”

“Just like that. You’re here for a few weeks, so am I. Why not enjoy each other while we can? After that we can just go our separate ways, just like before except we’ll end it on good terms.”

Too many points for him to argue with - you were right on all of them. He couldn’t disagree. In fact, he eagerly agreed. Little did he know you had this pitch rehearsed to perfection, to your benefit, because he seemed to be completely subdued by it.

“Fuck.” He mutters under his breath. Fumbling with his belt, zipper, exposing the line of his abdomen down to his hardening cock. A fat, heavy cock that swung between his muscular thighs. He was fully nude now, standing in front of you, his tan skin glistening in the sunlight. You’re quick to urge him over with a finger.

He pounces, but once he’s crawling over you on that narrow chair, he becomes slow.

“Hi.” You manage to whimper out, now feeling a bit small beneath him, feeling nervous even.

“Hey.” He’s just as nervous but there’s an energy that goes beyond either of your wills pulling you toward one another.

He kisses you. It’s a kiss you melt into, and he sinks his body against yours, with you spreading your legs so he can slot between them. His cock rests against your lower abdomen, his body pressing further into you.

You can’t help but slide your hand between your two bodies in an attempt to finger yourself, prepare yourself, but he stops you and pulls back.

“No.” He growls.

“No?” Is he going to leave you like this?!

“Let me.”

And you do. Chan lowers himself, adjusting you so he can easily bend over the chair while kneeling on the ground, and his hands shake as he dips the tip of his fingers into the hem of your bottoms, just slightly tugging at the material, playing with it before he starts to play with you. You’ve got the perfect view of him basically drooling over you.

He slides the bottoms to the side, but you pull at the strings at your hips, so they come undone and he pulls them away completely. Your lips and the juices coming from between them are just as glossy than your oiled skin.

He can’t help but dig in. Fucking you with his mouth, jamming his fingers in you. It’s an animalistic frenzy and it’s hot and slippery and sticky. You cum and your fluids spill over the impermeable cushion below, pooling under your ass. He can see every sparkling droplet fall from you.

It’s just a haze, he nearly jumps on you, bending your legs nearly over your head, bouncing his pelvis on your cunt like a trampoline, smacking with every thrust. You’re completely glued to one another. If he’s not abusing your mouth with his tongue then he’s biting on your shoulder or grunting, growling, into your ear. It’s filthy. You’re absolutely sure you’ve never been fucked like this.

He cums, several times, as do you. He pulls out each time, jerks himself off on your body, although a couple of times you urged him into your mouth and face. He pulls the triangles on your top to the sides, so your breasts are exposed. He made sure to cum on those too. Semen, sweat, squirt, oil, spit, everywhere there are droplets of your fluids shining on your body like jewels.

It ends with him lying on top of you, nearly sleeping from exhaustion, and your lips feel deliciously sore and sensitive, almost ticklish as he softens inside of you.

It happens again. Several times in fact. Many, many times. When his parents are away, when your mom is away, you fuck all the time. Just a little call of his name over the fence or from your window and he’d be running to you. You were too comfortable with one another to bother with formalities, it was like you’d never been separated. You’d wait for him on all fours, wet cunt on display for him to dive in, but he’d always greet you with a gentle kiss.

Fucking each others faces, drinking eachothers fluids. You even let him fuck you in the ass, multiple times, and he was the first guy to make you cum that way. You were just as hooked and as desperate as he was.

Things started to change though.

The welcoming kisses became longer, you’d talk between the rounds…

You’d fall asleep in his arms, or he in yours.

You’d fuck slowly, deeply, staring into each other’s eyes.

You’d talk to him, tell each other stories of all these years, asi if you had been together the entire time.

You’d smile as you made love, gently. You’d let him cum inside of you.

He’d hold your hand again. They were as soft and warm as you remembered.

You were holding his hand on one particular pink evening, your head resting on his heaving chest, teaching circles into his pecs and nipples. On your bed, in your quiet childhood room. It was a painful silence now. It had been weeks, weeks closer to your respective departure dates.

“I wish I had never left.” He eventually says. You don’t know what to say. “I wish we could have stayed like this for longer.”

“Maybe we would have broken up eventually, or left for college.” You ponder.

“Maybe I would have taken you to prom, or we would have had sex together for the first time…” He returns.

“On this bed? Hmm? With my cute school uniform?” You tease. “Yeah, maybe.”

“But I guess this is what was meant to be.” He sighs, as do you.

“I’m sorry.” Is all you can say.

“What for?”

“I don’t know, I just feel bad. I started this and now we have to go our separate ways again.” You feel something sting in your eye. You can’t cry now.

“Shh…” He coos as he hears you sniffle and feels you twitch. It makes his heart ache like it did all those years ago when he left.

“I - I…” You cry. “I don’t want you to go. I don’t want to go.”

He pulls you into his arms, crushing you in an embrace. Your eyes are closed but you feel the tears fall from his face, he’s crying too.

“I know… but what else can we do?”

There was nothing left to do, other than fuck the days away, crying, holding each other until it hurt. It was a horrible, horrible thing to have fallen in love with Christopher Bang this final summer.

You didn’t go with him to the airport. You didn’t want to say goodbye, you didn’t want to see where he was going.

But he did slip into your room that final night. You made love quietly, he kissed you as you cried.

He said it was the second time he loved you, and the second time he had to leave you.

It hurt much more this time around. Maybe you shouldn’t have done it, maybe you shouldn’t have gone next door.

Being in your house was unbearable once Chris wasn’t next door.

A week later, you’ve arrived at your new place. It had been a whirlwind and you stayed at a hotel the first couple of nights while your new furniture got brought in, most of your personal belongings only fitting in a couple of bags.

It’s kept you busy. That way you think about him a little less. Crying into pillows that have that certain ‘brand new’ smell isn’t quite as comforting as you’d expect. Everything seems unfamiliar, strange, artificial. Nothing here reminded you of him - it was for the best and you hated it.

The place is nice, bright. It’s on the third floor of a small apartment building, a couple of other doors beside yours in the hall. You go downstairs to grab a few packages that have arrived, carefully treading up the stairs in a kind of balancing act once they’re piled in your arms. It’s a choreography you can dance to with expertise, always denying any help from your neighbors.

However, you do fumble with the lock and handle once you’re at your door, holding the boxes up by pressing them against the door with your body as your hands blindly fumble with the keys, nothing but cardboard in your sight.

Nothing you can’t handle, until they start to slip.

“Woah, let me help you with that!” someone says behind you, and in your complicated state it’s a bit difficult to process what happens but the boxes are soon out of the way, said someone pulling them from you and freeing you.

And then you see him.

Him.

Your him.

He says your name and you’re too stunned to react. He’s in awe too. He drops your packages, and you’re certain some of them contain some makeup palettes but you don’t give a damn at the moment.

“What are you doing here?” You finally ask, frozen in place.

“I… live in 304.” He says.

“You live in 304?” He nods. “You? You’re serious?” He nods again, eyes still wide.

You both stand there, processing it all. This can’t be real.

“I live in 302.” you manage to say, after some time. Your voice is weak, all the air has left your lungs. You shake.

“You do?” He asks. Now you nod.

This can’t be.

But he cups your face, holds it like you’re precious and delicate, he kisses you. It is real. You kiss him back, harder. Eventually you’re both clinging to one another, gripping each other’s clothes desperately.

“You live here.” He says, little tears sparkling in the corner of his eyes. You nod, the same tears coming to you.

“I do. Mm-hmm.” The sniffles you let out seem so sweet to him, he swoons with how happy you are to see him. Knowing you feel the same joy he does - it makes him feel complete.

“I live here too!” He cries, laughing, smiling, beautifully.

One more kiss, just to make sure it’s real. You pull him in and kiss him one more time.

It’s real.

#bang chan smut #stray kids smut #skz chan smut #skz smut #bangchan smut

[mypoisonedvine]

the martyrdom of st. valentine (and other romantic stories) || dark!Bucky & dark!(stepbrother?)Steve x reader

summary: you wanted to surprise your boyfriend on valentine's day, but he and your foster brother have a surprise of their own.

word count: 2.7k

warnings: smut (heavy dubcon to the point of pretty much noncon), kinda stepcest (as per summary, steve is the reader's foster brother), bondage, a lil touch of degradation

2/14 to-do list

get waxed

get Steve out of the apartment

pick up chocolate-covered strawberries from bakery on 6th

blindfold and handcuff myself to the bed

be waiting for Bucky naked when he gets here

You sighed as you looked down at the paper, crossing the first and third items off the list. The second was going to be a bit harder, unfortunately; your foster brother had a habit of hanging around and cramping your style as much as he could manage. He felt like a real brother in that way… okay, maybe he felt like a real brother in most ways, a consequence of knowing him for most of your life, but he was definitely not your real brother. You remembered that each time you caught yourself staring too long when he was shirtless, or returning from the gym all veiny and glistening with sweat.

But you also remembered that he was still the closest thing to a real brother you'd ever had, and you scolded yourself internally for ever acting differently.

It didn’t matter now— you had Bucky, and he was the most amazing guy you’d ever met.  No, Steve was definitely not happy that introducing his best friend to his sister led to a relationship forming, but he couldn’t stop either of you in spite of his efforts to keep you apart.

Bucky had once expressed his suspicions that it was at least in part due to jealousy, if subliminal.  But you denied it unilaterally— he’s basically my brother, you told him, though it was more of a reminder to yourself than anything.

Perverted concerns about Steve’s motivations aside, Bucky was a great guy.  A bit of a sweet-talker for sure, and not exactly known for his ability to keep a long-term, serious relationship, but he was adamant that you had changed that and for once you were beginning to believe him.  You’d said from the beginning that you didn’t need this to be the proverbial ‘it’ for either of you but that you didn’t do hook-ups— especially with your brother’s friends, and extra especially with your brother’s closest and longest friend.  It only took a brief speech and two shots to convince you, now six months later and you were still going strong.

Days like this made you so happy you’d given in to his advances.  But they also made you regret giving in to Steve’s idea to be roommates in college.

“Stevie!” you yelped as he walked in, stuffing the to-do list into your backpocket.  “Just the man I wanted to see.”

“I doubt that,” he scoffed.  “It’s Valentine’s Day, I bet you want to see Bucky.  He’s coming over, right?  And you want me to fuck off so my best friend can go to town on my sister?”

You frowned, crossing your arms.  “I wanted to see you because I have a gift for you.”

“... you do?”  His eyebrow raised and you hoped your smirk looked just as smug as it felt.

“So do you want your gift or do you want to be an asshole?”

“Do I have to pick just one?” he joked.

“Just come over here,” you instructed, waving him closer.  He seemed hesitant, but eventually did as you’d asked.  From your other back pocket you pulled out two tickets.

“Rangers, center ice,” you beamed.  “For you and a date.”

“And this isn’t just an excuse to get me out of the house?”

“No, it’s a thank you for being such a great brother.”

“So, if I wanted to take Bucky…” he trailed off, already calling your bluff as you rolled your eyes.

“Okay, that’s just sad.  There’s no reason you can’t find a girl to take— god knows Bucky hasn’t spent a Valentine’s Day alone since the fucking eighth grade.  And you’re just as cute as he is!”

“Well, if you could alert the rest of the female population to that, that would be great,” he scoffed, “but until then I’ll take the tickets,” he decided as he took them from your hand.  “A Rangers game might be the only thing distracting enough to keep me from thinking about what you and Buck are gonna do while I’m gone.”

You were hoping for a little more enthusiasm considering how much the tickets had cost you, but at least he was going to go and give you the apartment to yourself for the evening.  “You’re welcome, by the way.”

After stripping and sprinkling rose petals on the comforter, you'd actually found a YouTube tutorial on how to blindfold and handcuff oneself, and it was a little odd that enough people had this problem to merit its existence but it was still very helpful: turns out the secret is to blindfold yourself first but keep it folded up with one eye able to see until you do the handcuffs, then use your arm to slide the blindfold down into place.

It was tricky, and a little bit extra awkward while naked, but you figured it out and smiled proudly to yourself as you completed your last task on your to-do list.

Now, for likely the most difficult task of all: waiting in darkness and silence for Bucky to arrive.

Apparently it is, in fact, possible to be slightly bored yet titillated.  The thought of what Bucky would do to you when he got here was exciting, but it only made you crave his presence more which enhanced your quiet loneliness.  It wasn't like you could read a book or listen to music to kill the time, so you settled for humming to yourself as you waited.

Don't go changing, to try and please me, something something before, hmmm

I just want someone that I can talk to, I want you just the way you are...

But that grew tiresome quickly and you resorted instead to planning exacty how angry you would be if Bucky was late when you were waiting for him in such a compromising and inconvenient state.  For a moment you imagined he'd really gone to the Rangers game with Steve and became briefly livid over a hypothetical situation.

The crackling roar of Bucky's motorcycle outside was distant but undeniable, making you smile in anticipation.  You worried for a moment that you might have locked the top lock of the front door by instinct, but thankfully Bucky and to make it inside alright since next thing you knew, your bedroom door was opening.

The rattle of the doorknob made your breath catch; you opened your legs slowly in time with the quiet creak of the hinges.  “I’ve been waiting for you…” you purred.

“Hi there, babydoll,” Bucky’s voice answered back huskily.

The heavy steps of his boots made it clear he hadn't taken his shoes off at the door, a habit that had driven you crazy since he was your annoying brother's also-annoying best friend.  Was this the real reason he'd chained you up, so he could freely irritate you?  What next, was he gonna put a cold drink on your nightstand without a coaster?

"You really went all out for me, sweetheart," he noticed, his voice closer than you'd expected; it was fun to not know exactly where he would be, it made you squirm under the gaze you couldn't see but could somehow feel.

How weight joining yours on the bed was a good sign to his location though, along with his hands sliding up your legs.

“Look at this pretty pussy,” he cooed pridefully as he dove in suddenly and licked a thick stripe through your folds.

“Fuck,” you shivered, tugging on your handcuffs unintentionally.

“Feel good, babygirl?” he pressed, chuckling when you nodded.  “You want more?”

“Please,” you whimpered.

He didn’t get back to it right away, the weight on the bed shifting slightly, and it made you fear that he planned to make you beg more before eating you out— but finally his lips returned to you as his tongue explored your sex.

“Oh god,” you moaned, your back arching of its own volition.  It was a little different than he normally did this— less confident and measured, more cautious yet hungry.  Typically he teased you a lot more, knowing exactly the spots that drove you wild and intentionally leaving them understimulated until you begged him to let you come, but now as soon as he found them he was targeting them— perhaps a rare show of mercy from the guy who was normally happy to leave you on edge for hours.

You could feel his moans vibrating into you when he slid his tongue inside and against your channel; it instantly made your back arch as the handcuffs quietly clinked above your head.

He stopped just a little too soon, pulling your hips up until the back of your legs were resting on the front of his.  Being manhandled by him turned you on enough to make you bite your lip.

"Fuck, put your cock in me, wanna feel you," you moaned your plea as you heard the rustling of clothes; your mouth watered when you imagined Bucky stripping, with that insane body of his.

His thick head glided over your entrance and you were preparing to beg some more when he suddenly pushed in, giving you what you wanted so much faster than normal.  Not that you were complaining!

He was also much quieter than normal, which you were actually willing to complain about but didn't.

"Oh god," you groaned at the feeling of him stretching you open, gasping when his cock brushed right over your spot— it made your body jolt each time he pulled back and hit it again.

"Feels good, huh?" Bucky asked and you nodded happily.

"So good," you whimpered.

"I wasn't asking you."

Before you could question it, Bucky’s calloused fingers pulled up your blindfold— but it was Steve’s face above you, Steve’s body on top of yours… and, much to your horror, Steve’s cock inside you.

“What the fuck?!” you yelped, trying to squirm away as you tugged at the cuffs but failing completely.

“Fuck,” Steve winced, “you get really tight when you struggle like that.”

“Don’t act so surprised, babygirl,” Bucky cooed playfully as you turned to stare at his devilish grin.  “You wanted this… you just didn’t want to admit it to yourself.  And Stevie here always wanted this, too, and aren’t you so glad he told me?”

You shuddered as Steve continued thrusting, pushing his cock so deep it made you feel a little nauseous.  "Steve, you've gotta stop," you begged.   "If you love me, you'll stop."

"That's the thing: I love you too much to stop."

He moved faster, paying no mind to your confused whimpers, holding your hips tight as his head fell back slightly which brandished his thick neck and bobbing Adam's apple.

"There's no point in pretending," Bucky reminded you coldly, watching the whole thing with crossed arms and an expression that almost looked… bemused?  "You already showed us how much you love it, so don't waste your time acting so disgusted now."

You regretted more than anything saying that it felt good, literally asking him to fuck you before you really understood what you were asking for: you thought it was Bucky, yes, but that didn't mean it was an act.  It did feel good, and that must've been obvious to everyone since you were so wet already.  You could hear it each time he pushed all the way in, that telltale squelching noise that was somehow disgusting and hot all at once.

Steve wasn't so quiet now that he didn't have to be.  "God, you feel so good," he whispered, grabbing the backs of your knees and pushing your legs up.  It forced his cock even deeper and you choked on your own suppressed moan.

You heard Bucky opening his belt, and turned your head to see him pull out and stroke his cock while he watched Steve fuck you.  It was hard to imagine what he was getting out of this; he never seemed like the sharing type, if anything he sometimes became too possessive.  But clearly there was a lot about him and Steve that you didn't understand.

"Play with her tits," Bucky instructed, voice a bit deeper as he pleasured himself, "makes her come so fast."

Steve dropped your legs to rest on his shoulders so his hands were free to grope your chest, thick fingers twisting and tugging your nipples.  Annoyingly, Bucky knew his way around your body well by now, and so it was difficult to pretend that Steve's touches weren't sending shocks of pleasure right down your spine and to your core.

You had been biting on your lip so hard to stay quiet that you feared you would break the skin, until Bucky leaned down and gave you a little slap on the cheek— not very hard, but enough to make you gasp which in turn released the moan you'd been holding back.

"There it is, honey, don't be quiet for my benefit," Bucky encouraged.  "It's okay to like it, I'm not gonna be jealous."

As if that was your concern; angering your boyfriend by enjoying being fucked by your foster brother.  

"You really overestimate my interest in your— fuck— in your feelings," you panted as you glared up at Bucky where he was grinning down at you with a look that almost indicated pride.

"You're gonna come, aren't you?" he asked, ignoring your resistance entirely.  Whatever chance you had at pretending he was wrong was lost when, just for a moment, your eyes widened at his question.  "Yeah, thought so.  I can tell by that dumb look on your face.  I'm close too, babydoll, betcha wanna taste it…"

His free hand roughly held your jaw open as he stroked himself desperately, his weak groan coinciding with the moment you felt his hot seed spray into your open mouth, his taste familiar despite the entirely surreal circumstances.

It was purely coincidence that you came in that moment, your walls bearing down on Steve while you tried to stay silent so you wouldn't choke on Bucky's spend.

"Fuck, that's it, gonna fill this pretty mouth— god yes, you'd better swallow it all," he sighed as come painted your tongue and the inside of your cheek.  Maybe it was more than normal or maybe it was just that he was tightening his hand around the head of his cock to get every drop in your mouth, but either way it was enough to give you quite a mouthful to swallow, which you did without much question due to force of habit.

"M’close too," Steve warned as Bucky stepped back, "I'm gonna come."

“No, Steve, not inside,” you whimpered, hearing the way your voice had weakened after your orgasm, “you can’t…”

“I can,” he disagreed, “Bucky said so.”

Once again, Bucky's will was more important than your own, and your desperate pulling at the handcuffs was only another reminder of the way you'd guided yourself into his trap.

"Don't," you stammered one more time, but it was hard to focus when he was filling you exactly how you needed, when his thick hands gripping your waist felt just as perfect as you'd secretly imagined so many times… 

Denial is a powerful drug, but so is two orgasms in a row.

"Fuck!" you yelped as you felt a gush of warmth drip from your entrance, even further wetness spurring on Steve's fast and brutal thrusts into you.

"Knew you'd love it," Steve mumbled, growling slightly as he slammed into you.  "Knew you'd take it so well, make a pretty mess all over my cock— fuck I can't wait anymore, gotta fill you up, oh my god... gotta give you my load, honey, you want it?"

"Yes," you sobbed, "Steve, yes, come in me…"

He didn't need much more encouragement than that, groaning loudly as you felt his cock flex and pulse against your walls, his release overwhelmingly hot inside you.

You sighed in time with Steve as he finally stilled, and it was hard to know where to look when Steve and Bucky were both staring down at you.  “What happens now?” you found yourself asking, not so much a literal question about the next task but more about what the three of you were going to do with all the unfortunate truths that had come to light in less than half an hour.

“What happens now is I take my turn,” Bucky informed you sternly, pushing Steve aside.  “Did you really think I wasn’t gonna fuck my girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?”

#dark!stucky x reader #dark!bucky barnes x reader #dark!steve rogers x reader #dark!bucky barnes smut #dark!steve rogers smut

[ragingbookdragon]

All I Wanna Be Is Somebody To You

A Jason Todd x Reader One-Shot

Word Count: 2.6K Warnings: None

Author's Note: For the one anon who wanted a nervous reader! I hope I did this justice for you, darling! Enjoy! -Thorne

**********************************************************************

She didn’t hate talking. Not really. But the idea of holding conversations with people she didn’t know sent her heart fluttering and her throat tightening until it was impossible to breathe. More often than not, she found herself apologizing a lot for the stuttering or the repeating of things she said. Most people gave her odd looks, told her to stop apologizing so much (like that ever helped anyone), or laughed and told her she was cute—which was nice until she realized they meant in a childish sort of way rather than an endearing one.

But it wasn’t always like that. According to her parents, there’d been a time when she couldn’t stop talking. Always had something to say and had somebody to tell. Something changed during her years, she knew when, even if she didn’t want to admit it to herself or her family when they asked what happened to their outgoing and talkative daughter. Too many times she’d heard, “You know no one cares about X, right?” or “Oh my God, will you shut up?” and every time she heard it from a friend it dug into her a little deeper, made her shut her mouth tighter, and tore her heart much harsher.

And because she chose to be the silent type instead of the outgoing one, people assumed her arrogant and cold, distant and rude, and she found herself spending most of middle school and high school by herself. She was glad when graduation came, and while she’d dreaded giving her valedictorian speech, she did manage to get through it without too much trouble. It did feel like her one triumph against everyone who ignored her throughout school.

College freed her. Allowed her to make a flexible schedule, take smaller classes, and be solitary when she wanted. She’d refused a dorm room on the campus, living only fifteen minutes from Gotham University, instead choosing to commute daily and she liked it a lot more than having roommates in a four-bedroom apartment on the school grounds.

When she wasn’t in class, she stayed home a lot. It came with being a homebody, but when she did go out into the great big city, she liked to shop. Little antique shops or bookstores. She went to bookstores more than she did school. There was something so wonderful about finding a book in the shop and sitting down at a café and reading quietly. Which is how she met him, and for the life of her she couldn’t figure out why he wanted anything to do with her. She was quiet and shy, and he was open and flirty. They obviously didn’t match in any way, shape, or form. At least, that’s what she thought.

***

She drew her gaze along the wall of books before her, chewing on the inside of her cheek as she searched for the novel. It’d been a long time since she’d read The Count of Monte Cristo, a copy of her father’s that he’d had when she was just a child. Something had reminded her of it the other day and all she could think about was getting her own so she could annotate in the margins.

As she came across it, she started reaching when someone got to it first, one finger pulling it out by its spine before taking it into their hand. She visibly deflated with a soft sigh as it was the last copy and hung her head in defeat.

“I’m sorry, were you wanting this too?” Her head cocked up and she gazed at the young man before her. He smiled and she felt like she’d been shot in the chest at how dazzling it was. “Here, you can have it.”

Swallowing thickly, she shook her head, “You got it first.” Nodding, she added, “It’s yours.”

He cocked a brow at that. “Well, from the devastated look on your face, doll, you want it to be yours.”

Her cheeks warmed at that, and she felt nervous where she stood, resisting the urge to fidget under his scrutiny. “N-no it’s okay.” She said. “You take it.”

“Oh no you don’t. That’s not how this works.” He chuckled and took her hands, pressing the book into them, then he winked at her. “The doll deserves to have her book.”

If there had ever been a time in which she wanted to explode from embarrassment, it was then, and before she knew it, she shoved the book back into his arms and so hard that it must’ve knocked the wind out of him because he gasped. She spun around and took off down the aisle and out the front doors as fast as she could, wanting nothing more than to disappear in the crowded streets. That or sink into the ground. Maybe next week she’d come back and get the book. Hopefully, he wouldn’t be there again.

***

Then again, her hopes were always wrong, and she picked up the copy of The Divine Comedy, flipping it open to read the first page.

“I see you’re a fan of the classics, aren’t you, doll?”

She snapped the book shut when she heard his voice and looked over at him. Something inside annoyed her at the cocky smirk he wore, much more was the arm he had resting on the top of the bookshelf as he gazed at her.

“You know, you left a nice bruise on me the other week.” He quipped, shifting his weight to cross his ankles. “You’re pretty strong.”

“Thank you,” she muttered, turning to look back at the book. “Sorry I hit you…it was an accident.”

“Well, I can accept your apology if you tell me your name.”

“Why?” she questioned quietly, wiggling her toes.

“Because I wanna put a name to such a cute face. Why else?” he flirted, and she scowled at the book cover. “Oh, that’s an even more adorable face.”

“Quit doing that!” she hissed. “It’s not funny!”

He chuckled. “Oh contraire, it’s actually hilarious.” He took a step towards her. “I’m Jason, by the way.”

Her eyes darted to the outstretched hand, and she stared at it for a split second before softly shaking it. “(Y/N).” she murmured.

Before she could pull her hand back, he raised it and pressed his lips to her knuckles. “Enchanté ma chérie,” he professed, breath hot against her skin and just like before, she was so absolutely flustered she was yanking her hand back and poor Jason’s grip slipped, and he whacked himself in the face with his own hand.

“Nice to meet you!” (Y/N) yelped and scurried off down the aisle and to the register where she purchased her book in record time. Third time was the charm and she prayed that he wouldn’t be there again.

***

And whoever lived upstairs must’ve really had it out for her because she flipped the page in her One Thousand and One Arabian Nights and heard an exaggerated cough. Looking up through her eyelashes, she saw Jason standing there with a grin on his face. “Hello (Y/N),” he purred, and she immediately felt her cheeks become hot.

“Hi Jason,” she muttered, gazing at her book, listening to the chair screech as he sat down across from her.

“How are you doing today?” he asked, setting down his own copy of Arabian Nights.

(Y/N) cleared her throat, finding it harder to focus on the book over the smell of his woody and oriental cologne. She thought she smelled a twinge of tobacco with it. “I’m fine.” Her eyes found his teal ones for a moment. “And you?”

He smiled, making her heart pick up a beat. “Doing pretty good.” He winked. “I got to see you again. Though I’m hoping I don’t get hit again. Either by a book or my own fist.”

“Sorry…” she cringed, sinking down in her seat. “That was an accident.”

Jason shrugged and propped his elbows on the table, placing his chin on his fingers. “Don’t worry about it. Say, do you like coffee?”

“I do,” she murmured.

“Great, want anything from the café?” he asked, nodding at the board and she looked over at it.

“I guess I could order a latte,” she replied more to herself than him, starting to pull her wallet out.

“Nah, I got it.” Jason said, standing from his seat.

(Y/N) blinked. “Wait, what?”

“I said I got it.” He quipped and she jumped from her seat to stop him, but caught the leg of her chair, and she flailed, stumbling right into Jason. They went tumbling to the floor and she landed atop him. For a minute they were both stunned silent as the people in the store looked at them and he smirked at her. “Well, this saves me the trouble of asking you out to dinner.” He winked again. “Should’ve told me you had a bold streak, doll.”

She immediately scrambled up, placing one of her hands on his chest to shove off him when her leg slipped, and her knee went into his groin. He groaned and rolled over, holding his crotch and (Y/N) was so mortified all she could do was apologize profusely and at one point she was sure she was mixing up her words, but it didn’t matter. Grabbing her things, she started running off a third time.

Though she’d made it ten feet out of the door and down the street before someone grabbed her round the waist and hauled her to a stop. “Oh no! We’re not doing this pattern again! I am not getting hit a fourth time!”

(Y/N) spun in his arm and gaped at him. “I’m sorry!”

Jason sighed heavily and lowered his head. “Holy crap, I’ve never had such a hard time getting a girl to go out with me.”

“You wanna go out with me?” She pointed to herself despite her flustered state. “W-with me?” she gave him a dubious look. “Really? M-me?”

“Well, if you wanna hit me a fourth time to be sure, go ahead, but yeah,” he retorted then heaved another sigh. “Jeez, talk about getting hit on.”

(Y/N) spluttered at that. “I did not hit on you!”

“Right, you just hit me instead.”

“It was an accident! And I said I was sorry!”

Jason grinned at her and arm away. “Well, I’ll accept your sorry’s if you go on a date with me.”

She blinked at him. “A date? When?”

“Tonight.” He said. “There’s a bookstore down in the town square for insomniacs. Open until seven A.M. and serves a mean cup of hot cocoa.” Jason smiled and took her hand. “So? How ‘bout it, doll? Wanna go out with me tonight?”

All she could do was simply stare at this gorgeous man that obviously had a thing for her for some god forsaken reason. “Why?” she asked blankly, and he seemed to falter at that.

“Why what?” he repeated, confusion etching across his face.

“Why do you wanna go out with me?” (Y/N) gestured to herself. “I’m weird.”

“So am I.” he agreed.

“I stutter a lot.”

“So does my brother.”

“I don’t talk a lot. I don’t like talking a lot. People get mad at me when I talk a lot and I prefer to listen and you’re not going to like going out with me because I’m going to be super quiet because I get flustered easily and I—”

Jason put his hand over her mouth and stared at her. “Do you ever take a breath?” she nodded silently, and he sighed. “Look, (Y/N), it’s only taken getting shoved in the stomach with a book, getting punched with my own hand, and getting nut-shot to understand that you’re not exactly comfortable with the public.”

He removed his hand. “That’s why I invited you to the bookstore. Because even in the few weeks we’ve known each other, I know you like quiet places. But if you don’t feel comfortable going with me right now, that’s okay. We can take it slow.” Jason smiled at her. “Doll, all I wanna be is somebody to you.”

(Y/N) swallowed thickly and looked at her feet, whispering, “I…don’t wanna go out right now…but I’d like to give you my number…if you’re okay with that?” she shrugged. “We can text.” Feeling hopeful she reached out and placed her hang on his arm. “And get to know each other better? Maybe tell each other our favorite books? That’s…the best way in my opinion.”

His face lit up and he murmured, “I’d love that.” He pulled out his phone, tapping at it before he handed it over to her. “Here you go.”

She took it and looked at the contact name he’d already put in. My Flustered Doll. She glared at him. “You think you’re pretty cute, don’t you, Jason? You’re not. At all.”

He smirked. “Oh, is that so?” She nodded and he quipped, “We’ll just see about that then.”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes and typed in her number, handing him back his phone. “There you go.” He glanced at it, seemingly satisfied before he locked it and put it back in his pocket, then they met each other’s gazes and she awkwardly pointed over her shoulder. “I’m going home now.”

Jason caught her hand and kissed the back of it. “See you later, doll. Stay cute.”

She was hurrying off again, his laughter in her ears, unaware that their exchanging of numbers was going to evolve into so much more in the coming months.

***

“—And I’m pretty sure I can never show my face again at school, Jay. I’ve never been so embarrassed in all my life.”

He hummed, fingers gently dipping into her spine. “Well, this is coming from the girl that nut-shotted be in the middle of a busy bookstore.”

“Why would you remind me about that?” (Y/N) scowled. “It was an accident.”

“And yet it can’t be more mortifying than telling a guy to shove his head up his ass.” He retorted, eyes still closed as they basked in the sunlight streaming through the window. “This is at least a five on the ten scale.”

“More like a hundred.” She muttered, tucking her head under his chin. “I can’t believe I said that to him. Oh, I was just so—just so mad at what he said about my poem! He was just being mean!” (Y/N) gripped his sweatshirt. “You understand right?”

Jason nodded, his other hand resting at her hip. “Mhm.”

“You don’t think I’m overreacting, do you?” she frowned. “Everyone else thinks I am.”

“Telling someone that their poetry isn’t good because it isn’t iambic pentameter isn’t following constructive criticism, doll. It’s called being a douche.” She giggled and he bent his neck, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Call me next time Lord Douche-Canoe starts on your poetry again and I’ll school him on face-time.”

(Y/N) giggled again and rolled over, pressing them chest to chest and she grinned when he whined at her moving. “Thank you, Jason.”

He smiled at her. “I only take my thanks in kisses. Sorry, doll.”

Rolling her eyes, she bent down and pressed her lips to his. “I love you,” she murmured against him, and he hummed, hands grasping her hips.

“I love you more.”

“Nonsense.”

“Nonsense?” he scoffed, pulling back to look at her. “I am willingly in a relationship with the girl who nut-shot me in—MMHPF!”

(Y/N) shoved a pillow into his face, face hot as she shouted, “Stop bringing that up! It was an accident!” All she got in return was his laughter.

#jason todd x reader #jason todd x reader imagines #jason todd x reader imagine #jason todd imagines #jason todd imagine #jason todd #red hood x reader #red hood x reader imagines #red hood x reader imagine #red hood imagines #red hood imagine #red hood #batfamily x reader #batfamily x reader imagines #batfamily x reader imagine #batfamily imagines #batfamily imagine #dc comics #dc imagines #dc imagine #dc

[bnhabadass]

Pairing: Shinsou x Reader Genre: Angst with happy ending, NSFW Word Count: 4,049 Synopsis: Shinsou is sick and tired of seeing you go out on all these disappointing Tinder hookups, especially when you always seem to ask him to satisfy you afterwards. But there must be a reason why you keep going on these dates, right? A/N: This is my piece for the bnharem roommates collab. I always forget how much I love writing Shinsou’s character but this definitely brought my spark with him back. Make sure to check out everyone else’s collab pieces on the masterlist!

Another night of tinder swipes. Another night of late night walks through desolate and windy streets. Another night of sleepy dinner and listening to the same old boring stories that every date has to offer. Another night of disappointing sex as he can’t seem to find the hole and his finger nails are sharper than they need to be. Another night of two pump chumps who ask, “does that feel good baby?” and another night of lying through your teeth as you fake moans and count the seconds before you’re allowed to leave.

It’s just like any other Saturday night where your toes are crushed in the tips of your heels and you shiver as you walk back to your apartment, keys clutched between your fingers just in case someone tries to pull something and you need to think quickly. You have your routine ingrained in you, like second nature.

The walk back home is cold and clammy. You can’t shake the feeling of the little hairs on your arms and legs springing up like a cat in shock as the wind pushes right past you. The only thing you could think of to keep yourself from toppling over from exhaustion was the heat that would be coming from your room back home, the fuzzy blanket you’d lie under, and the man awaiting your return to greet you with surprises like no other.

When you did open the front door, heat wafted towards you and your achy muscles began to relax.

“Rough night?” The voice from inside cooed.

“‘Oh baby do you like that?’” you mocked. “‘Does that hurt so good?’”

The person sitting on the sofa with a book covering their face laughed. “Please tell me he did not say that.”

You kicked off your heels and rolled out your ankles. “Shinsou, I swear to god, you have to meet some of these people. This one guy was ridiculous. As I was sucking him off he told me I reminded him of his mother.”

The purple haired young man gagged. “And you still sucked his dick?”

“That’s the best part,” you laughed. “He finished right after he said that.”

Shinsou grimaced. “Why do you keep going on these dates when everyone you end up sleeping with sucks.”

You collapsed on the couch next to him. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s because a certain someone always ends up taking care of me after.” Laying your head in his lap, you smiled up at him.

Shinsou gave you a lazy smirk back. “So that’s it, huh? I actually know how to use my tongue so you’re purposefully coming home unsatisfied.”

“I wouldn’t say purposefully,” you said with a mock offended tone to your words. “If there ever is a man out there who did know how to please me then I can guarantee I wouldn’t be coming home every night I have a date.”

He propped his cheek up against the palm of his hand. “But that hasn’t happened yet, has it.”

You loved this, the flirty and dangerous aroma in the air. It was intoxicating and you craved every bit of it.

“So what are we going to do about it?”

You leaned up and kissed him, and then that kiss led to another. Soon you had gotten up and moved into Shinsou’s bedroom. Your tights had been stripped down and your dress was pulled up over your ass.

Getting onto his elbows and knees, Shinsou readied himself to lick his first stripe along your folds and make you melt beneath him.

The week went by, like usual, and your relationship with Shinsou remained the same, just like usual. You’d each come home from work, him tired from training and patrols and you exhausted with paperwork and having to deal with bothersome coworkers taking up all your spare time.

Nothing happens during the week. The two of you laugh and joke around like best friends, like neither of you have seen each other naked, and you’re sure you’re happy this way. That’s what Shinsou keeps telling himself anyway.

You never seem to notice the way his eyes linger on you for a split second too long or the way he glares at your phone over your shoulder as you swipe left or right on dating apps. You’d think that if he was jealous he would try to distance himself, to back away from the trouble you might get in and the disappointment you’d find after each hookup. But no, Shinsou cares too much about you to let you go out on your own without knowing who, where and how you’re setting yourself up for disappointment.

“Hey Shin,” you call from the couch on Thursday night. You’re lying down with your feet propped up against the arm rest. Shinsou has to move them out of the way before plopping down himself.

“What’s up.” His large palm rubbed up and down your legs as they rested on his lap.

“I think I matched with someone who won’t be horrible in bed.” You showed him your phone, and as he scrolled through his profile you could feel the itchy heat of embarrassment rising to your face.

Shinsou’s heart seemed to stop. His eyes widened when he read the words “pornstar” and “Onlyfans'' in the dude’s bio. Handing your phone back to you, he kept his eyes trained on the floor. “That’s great. He seems like he knows what he’s doing.”

“Yeah.” You took the phone back and resumed looking through his photos. “He messaged me earlier and we have a lot in common too.”

Shinsou nodded. Why did he feel so weird? He knew that not every guy you matched with would be a disappointment. He had been telling that to himself for months now, but watching the nervous smile that crept up your face as you received a new message from this guy made Shinsou want to scream. “I’m gonna go for a run,” he said, lifting up your legs to stand up from the couch.

“Really? It’s dark out. Are you sure you want to go running?” You didn’t look up from your phone.

“Yeah I’ll be fine.”

“Okay, stay safe. Oh! Did you still want to watch a movie tonight?”

Shinsou froze. “Um, maybe not tonight. I’m not sure. I’ll see if I’ve cooled down a bit after my run.”

You looked up from the screen, slightly deterred. “Oh, okay. Have a good run.” You weren’t exactly sure what he meant by that. He hadn’t seemed to be bothered by anything earlier, so why was he acting weird now? You were sure you hadn’t said anything to make him upset and when he told you about his day, he didn’t seem bothered by anything that happened at work.

Rolling over on your side, you continued texting this new guy, a new sense of nervousness clouding your vision.

It’s Saturday night and you’re putting on your makeup. Your hands which have never been shaky before have fucked applying your eyeliner three times now. You’re not sure why you’re so nervous. You’ve met up with guys every weekend for months now. Could it be that this guy is different because he knows what he’s doing? Yeah, that must be it. You’re worried that you won’t be good enough for him, right?

Still, that didn’t seem like that was it. You were so excited talking to him at first. He made you laugh and you wanted to meet up with him so bad, to see his charm in person. But then you showed his profile to Shinsou and things started to feel different, like somehow they were falling apart.

You haven’t spoken to your roommate much in the last couple days. His usual pokes and prods at the men you tend to meet up with were replaced with silence. You haven’t joked around like usual or spent time together unwinding after work, and you were worried. It hadn’t been this distant between you since one of your female friends told you about a guy she knew who was looking for a roommate and the two of you met for the first time.

Since then, you haven't gotten anything but closer. You began your weekly rituals of getting takeout and watching movies and getting drunk after particularly rough days at work. Living with Shinsou was the happiest you have been in a long time. So why did that change?

Stepping out of your bedroom, makeup incomplete and dress unbuttoned, you peered into the living room where Shinsou was working.

He sat shirtless on the couch, legs propped up on the automen with his laptop balanced on his legs. His wild purple hair, which had gotten longer since the two of you met, was loosely tied back with a hair tie. His gray sweatpants were untied and you were sure that if he were to stand up they would ride low on his hips.

As you stared at his profile, you couldn’t help but admire how his chiseled face, adorning a pair of reading glasses, looked so serene as he stared at the work ahead of him. He looked calm, calmer than you’ve seen him in a while, and that made his face more youthful. Shinsou stretched out his arms and you could hear his corded back crack before he went back to typing away.

You ran back into your room and slammed the door. Your face was hot and flushed. Beads of sweat permeated on your temples. How could such a simple act of stretching make you feel so hot and bothered and worked up and oh no. How is it that you were so blind? You were in love with your roommate.

Shit shit shit shit shit.

You paced back and forth, rubbing all of the makeup off of your eyes in the process. You stared at your blackened fingers and rubbed them on your dress, not caring that it would dirty. Thinking back to all the moments you cuddled as “friends” and all the times you would lay together after a disappointing date, you were able to pinpoint each exact moment where your feelings grew.

You sat on your bed and watched as your hands shook. You couldn’t go on this date now. You don’t care about the guy, no matter how good at sex he might claim to be. The entire time, you’d just be wishing you were on a date with Shinsou. Granted, every date you’ve been on, a little part of you has wished it was with Shinsou. Every week you couldn’t wait until it was over so you could be enveloped yet again in his flirty aroma that was so, so addictive.

So that was it, you wouldn’t go on the date and things would go back to normal between the two of you. But would they really? What would you say if he asked why you cancelled? All you wanted were things to go back to the way they were. You wanted to bask in the flirty air and feel Shinsou hold you close and caress every curve of your body with so much love and tenderness.

You stood up and looked at your blotchy face in the mirror. Surrounding your eyes was a mix of black and shimmery gold swarming together. You wiped them off along with the rest of your makeup. You won’t be going out tonight so there’s no point of dolling up.

What am I going to do?

You slid off your dress and slipped into a pair of pajama bottoms and threw on a tank top. The least you could be is comfortable in such a stressful situation.

I can’t act the way I used to, knowing how I feel now.

You may have been an idiot for this, but you decided to face your situation head on. Without doing so, who knows how you wouldn’t go crazy living under the same roof as the man you’re in love with.

You stepped into the living room. Shinsou was still typing away and looking over reports, so you cleared your throat to get his attention.

“Hey, you about to go out?” When you didn’t respond, he looked up and his face fell. “What’s wrong? Why aren’t you dressed?”

You couldn’t look him in the eye. As soon as you heard him speak and the amount of concern in his voice, you just wanted to cry. The sting of acidic tears and mucus welling in the back of your throat made you want to throw up.

“Did something happen?” He took off his reading glasses and scooched over, letting you take a seat beside him.

But you didn’t move, just kept staring at your cold feet against the hardwood floor.

“(Y/n), talk to me.”

You looked up at him and tears began rolling down your face. You felt so pathetic, that you would be crying over love of all things. Love was supposed to be magical, right? Not embarrassing and tear-ridden. “Can you,” you started, but you needed to take a step back when you heard your achy throat cracking as you spoke. “Can you give me a reason not to go?”

Shinsou adjusted himself. He was clearly trying to make out what you were saying. “What? If you don’t want to go then don’t. No one’s forcing you to go on this date.”

You couldn’t help crumble at what he said. If only he knew what you really looked forward to after each date and what you were really thinking about when you were out with these other guys.

Shinsou stood up as you crumbled to the ground and squatted down next to you, wrapping his arms around you. You sunk into his chest and sobbed against him. It felt so unfair that with his arms around you, you felt whole, like you were two pieces of a puzzle.

“Why do you need a reason not to go on this date? Is he pressuring you or something?”

You shook your head against his chest. “I don’t want to go on a date with him.” On one hand, you thought your subtle hints would get through Shinsou’s thick skull, but it seemed as though they were a paper plane trying to penetrate a brick wall.

“So find some other guy.”

Why was he being so dismissive? You didn’t want just some other guy, you wanted Shinsou.

“Look, you’ve found plenty of other dates in the past, just because you don’t want to go out with one guy doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world.” He kept rubbing circles in your back. “Why don’t you call up a past hookup or something?”

You pushed away from him. “How could you say that,” you whispered. “I don’t want to go on a date with one of them.” Your voice began to raise. You had never raised your voice at Shinsou before. “I want to go out with you, you idiot.”

There was a moment where all you could hear were the little noises throughout the apartment like the ticking of the clock in the kitchen or a fly buzzing close by. Then, you slapped a hand over your mouth. You didn’t mean to say that outloud. You didn’t mean to raise your voice or push away from him. But you did blurt it out, and Shinsou looked at you with wide eyes and a slack jaw.

The hair on his arms and the back of his neck raised up like static. He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know if he should look at you with shock or look away in embarrassment. He was completely and utterly confused.

“Shit,” you whined from behind your hand. “Forget it.” You rubbed the tears under your eyes away and went to stand up. “I’m gonna go to bed.”

“Wait.” Shinsou grabbed your hand before you could fully stand up. You had never realized how small your hands were compared to his until now. “You can’t just say that and then walk away.”

He was right. You sat back down on the ground, his hand still grabbing onto yours, playing with your fingers. “Okay,” you mouthed, knowing you wouldn’t be able to get any sound out if you tried.

“Why do you go on all of these dates?”

You thought about it for a moment. You were never really sure why you bothered hooking up with so many people, but sitting on the ground with him, you had a pretty good idea. “Because we’re roommates.”

“So?”

You kept your eyes on your fingers intertwined with Shinsous. “Because realizing you’re in love with your roommate is shitty, so the least I could do is hope that after an unsatisfying night of sex, you’d be willing to provide.”

He stopped playing with your fingers and instead, squeezed your hand. “And I hated seeing you with these different men so much that any chance you gave me I ate up.”

You blinked once, twice in confusion before meeting Shinsou’s eyes. “You...”

“Mhm,” he nodded.

The heavy weight of tears on your chest finally lifted. You could finally breathe freely. There was silence among you before the two of you burst out laughing. You rested your head on his shoulder as your chests heaved up and down. When you took your head away to look him in the eyes, he leaned in and kissed you. You didn’t hesitate to kiss back and wrap your arms around his neck.

Shinsou dragged your body closer to him, so you were straddling his lap, and weaved his arms around your figure. He was a good kisser, which you already knew, but you had never taken the time to feel his passion until now. Shinsou made sure to tease you with a darting tongue and hands which traveled down your figure and stopped at the base of your hips.

You weaved your hands through his soft hair and pulled his hair tie out. His fluffy purple locks were so fun and tempting to tug on. Kissing him with this amount of love and emotion enthralled you, and you felt a little disappointed when he pulled away.

“Would you like to move this to my bedroom?”

And you bit your bottom lip before nodding, a smile creeping its way up along your face. You stood up and followed him into his bedroom eagerly.

After Shinsou closed the door behind you, he turned around and snaked his hands up your back. You giggled at the contact and let him pull the shirt over your head. You weren’t wearing a bra, so Shinsou immediately leaned over to take one of your nipples in his mouth. He sucked it until it puckered and let it go with a loud pop.

“You know,” he said, backing you against his bed. “I’ve never been able to say until now how truly beautiful you are.”

“Shinsou,” you sighed, taking a hold of his purple locks. You collapsed onto the bed and let him kiss his way down your front side. His kisses were rough but full of love, and you know they would leave bruises behind.

He slid your pajama bottoms and underwear down your thighs until they pooled on the floor at your ankles. “Everything you do is gorgeous, even the way you’re sprawled out under me, under my command just waiting for me to touch you.”

You could feel your pussy clench at his words and your thighs shook in waiting.

He kissed the top of your pussy and trailed kisses around your thighs. You watched as he hiked your legs over his well muscled shoulders while keeping eye contact. His long tongue darted out and he licked one long stripe between your folds and suckled on your little sweet bud.

You arched your back and let out a choked moan. Out of all the nights you’ve slept together, this was the first time you really saw him for all the love he gave you.

Shinsou kept his face right in front of your dripping hole just for a moment and let his hot breath tickle your needy clit. He chuckled at your squirming form and teased you even further with kitten licks and hands that reached up to squeeze your breasts as he dove in to lap up your juices.

Your hands grasped at his, keeping them firmly clenched onto your chest as he delved in deeper and deeper into your wonderful taste. You could feel your orgasm quickly building up. Your toes curled and knees jerked up, hips bucking your clit further up into Shinsou’s mouth. You let out a loud moan and sigh of relief and surprise when you could feel your juices spraying onto Shinsou’s face and watched as they dripped down his chin.

You had never squirted before. You could feel a calm wash over you as you settled down. Shinsou wiped his hand down his chin. “That was fucking sexy.”

He kissed your lower lips one last time before standing up and allowing you to scooch further up on the bed. You were exhausted but it didn’t matter. Watching Shinsou strip down and seeing his cock spring to life only made you want more of him.

He crawled over you and kissed your lips. He tasted like a mix of your juices and honey, probably from that tea you saw him drinking not too long ago. Whatever it was, it was addictive. “Are you ready?” he asked as he positioned the head of his cock in line with your opening.

You nodded, heaving up and down and running your hand along the side of his face. “Yeah, I’m ready.”

Shinsou was thicker than most of the people you had slept with, and you always felt the stretch of him penetrating you every time he pushed himself in.

Knowing that it probably hurt a little, the stretch of it all, he paused every so often and kissed your face, allowing you to warm up before he bottomed out inside of you. You were just so tight and welcoming, it took all his strength not to pound into you immediately, to take it nice and slow as he rubbed against your clit with his thumb.

Your face was hot. It was odd to you that it had never felt this way before, that until now you had never been this nervous to feel his cock pulsing inside of you and to feel his mouth nip at your clit and nipples. You had closed your eyes and focused on your breathing.

Shinsou reached over to tickle the palm of your hand. As you looked up at him, he cupped your face and smiled down at you before he started to thrust his hips.

You squirmed and writhed around as he bucked deeper in and out of the hole that seemed to suck him in further and further.

He felt it was so unfair because he never seemed to last as long as he wanted to when he was with you. The way your aching pussy clenched around him so tight was euphoric. He wanted to let his dick bask in your warm, gushing cavern forever.

“You’re beautiful,” you heard him whisper as he sped up, his orgasm fast approaching. “You’re perfect.”

And again, you squirmed around as that cord built up inside of you and snapped, leaving you gushing around Shinsou’s cock and heaving up and down underneath him.

Shinsou didn’t last much longer. He came almost immediately after you did, feeling your walls clench around him oh so tight. He rolled over next to you and laid his head in the crook of your neck. His hair tickled your nose as you nuzzled into him.

“We should clean up.”

“After snuggles,” he yawned.

You laughed. He’d never been this clingy until now. He had never praised you so much until now. “What does this mean?”

“Hm?”

“For us?”

Shinsou rolled over to look at you. “It means you’re gonna sleep in this bed with me tonight, and tomorrow morning I’m waking up early to make my girlfriend a pancake breakfast. Okay, kitten?”

You had to keep yourself from squealing at the nickname. Instead, you closed your eyes with a goofy smile on your face. “Okay.”

#bnha shinsou #hitoshi shinsou #shinsou x reader #shinsou x reader lemon #my hero academia x reader #Hitoshi Shinsou x reader #bnha #mha #mha shinsou #bnharem collab #server collab #nora writes stuff

[delimeful]

pull apart at the seams (7)

continued from this fic! some of the chapters for this (5&6) are only on ao3 so make sure to check there if you haven’t!

warnings: arguing, PTSD, panic, dehumanization, angst

-

“Logan Sanders!”

Above him, Logan froze, and for a moment his expression was nearly comical, reminiscent of nothing more than a cat caught with both paws stuck in the canary cage.

A heartbeat later, his features forcibly smoothed down into a cold neutrality, and with the giant’s shadow still weighing heavy over him, Virgil was swiftly reminded just who the canary was in that metaphor.

The giant didn’t reach for him, though, stiffening up from his admittedly incriminating looming position to turn and face Patton’s glare head on. Virgil didn’t think he’d ever seen Patton look so angry, and he probably never would again if his estimate of how likely he was to get out of the situation alive was correct.

Behind Patton’s shoulder, the other werewolf— Roman?— was peeking out past the doorway, making sheepish eye contact with Logan, and silently but exaggeratedly mouthing what looked like an apology. It made a confusing addition to an already alarming situation.

Virgil himself felt as though the rug had been yanked out from beneath him. First, some semblance of a conversation and even a near-apology from the guy he’d been convinced would horrifically murder him for the past week, and now Patton was, what, defending his property from his packmate?

“What in the world do you think you’re doing?” the giant in question continued, lips curling up in a barely-suppressed snarl.

“We were simply having a conversation,” Logan replied, sweeping a hand back slightly to indicate Virgil in the ‘we.’

Virgil just barely managed not to flinch, remaining perfectly still instead. Patton’s gaze flickered to him for a moment before returning to Logan somehow more intense than before.

“Was it really just a conversation?” he asked, firming his stance as though to say that he wasn’t going to let this go.

Logan’s shoulders rose a few millimeters defensively, but his demeanor only grew icier. “I wasn’t aware that you were the only one in this household who was allowed to try and communicate with the human.”

“Communicate with--,” Patton stepped forward, “You looked like a scavenger bearing down on a pup! Why would you corner him like that?”

Logan clicked his tongue irritably. “It’s impossible not to corner him, he’s a human! Being in the same room as a creature that small and slow could qualify as ‘cornering’!”

“You know what I mean!”

Still hovering in the doorway, Roman was grimacing, glancing between the two of them as though watching a particularly heated tennis match.

Virgil felt more like he was watching bombs go off, the argument too loud, too harsh, too reminiscent of his months in conditioning. Each sharp gesture or cutting glare registered as wrong-bad-hisfault, electric-spark phantom pains building up in the back of his skull. He swayed on his feet.

“He’s terrified of you, and you’ve certainly given him plenty of reason to be!” Patton shouted, and the room went quiet and suffocating, Virgil’s survival instincts dragging his attention back to the present.

“He told you.” Logan’s voice was monotone, but it sent terror racing down Virgil’s spine worse than any growl. His mouth formed the shape of protesting words, I didn’t I swear I didn’t, but no sound came out, his lungs constricted by the tense certainty that this was it, this was really how he died.

Patton shook his head, some of the anger fading from his frame, washed away by misery. “I guessed, Logan. The pieces were all there, sitting in front of my face, but I… I didn’t want to see the full picture.”

There was a terrible, fraught stretch of silence, and then Logan’s gaze slid to the side, going distant and glassy. “How long do I have to pack, then?”

“What?” “What?” The other two giants asked, voices overlapping.

“I understand. I’m being evicted for my transgressions,” he forced through grit teeth. “How long do I have?”

“Logan, no,” Patton replied fretfully. “We’re not kicking you out, you’re part of this family! We want you here!”

“I don’t believe the human I tormented will agree,” Logan bit out, but the words were double-edged with guilt, cutting back against himself. “Forcing him to share a residence with me would be cruel.”

Cruel.

There was a sharp, bitter sound, almost unrecognizable as a laugh, and Virgil only realized it had come from him after every eye in the kitchen turned his way. His chest seized with panic again, and he crumpled to his knees.

“Vee!” Patton gasped, and steps thundered closer, a hand hovering overhead--

“Don’t!” Virgil managed, the cry cracking halfway through. He curled in on himself, as though presenting a smaller target and begging would do anything but diminish him in their eyes even more. “Please don’t.”

Patton paused above him. “Don’t-- Don’t what, kiddo?”

Don’t grab him, don’t touch him, don’t look at him. How was he supposed to explain? They didn't understand anything.

“Don’t,” he said again, and flinched away from each of Patton’s movements.

“I-- I don’t understand,” Patton started weakly, and this time it was Logan that cut him off.

“Forcing him to share a residence with me would be cruel,” he repeated slowly, like he was puzzling each word against Virgil’s reaction to see how they fit. “Forcing-- Oh. Forcing him to stay where he doesn’t feel safe… would be cruel.”

A beat later, Patton’s shadow retreated from him entirely. The bands around his chest eased slightly.

“Let me go,” he choked out, each word bringing back memories of singed hair and tingling skin. “Just let me leave. Please. I didn’t want to be bought. I’m a person.”

A beat of silence, and then a set of footsteps rushed out, followed shortly by another set, leaving him behind. The fragile threads of Virgil’s hope dissolved back into nothingness.

“Leave and go where?” the last giant in the room asked.

Roman stepped closer, meeting Virgil’s gaze stubbornly. “To go get caught again? Or die out in the first storm that catches you? Everything here is just as huge as us.”

“Better than… dying here,” Virgil spat, and then his throat closed up, deciding that was enough words for today and quite possibly forever.

“What about living here?” Roman asked, glancing after his packmates briefly with unhidden worry. “Genuine living. Not as a pet or a-- a captive. Just as a roommate. I mean, obviously you don’t precisely trust us at the moment, but a mutually beneficial arrangement could be worked out.”

Virgil stared at him with dull, confused eyes, watching as the giant got more antsy with each passing moment of Virgil’s unresponsiveness.

“Don’t get me wrong, I still find humans downright impertinent, but if you go off and die, my pack is going to be miserable and morose for more than a few moons,” he continued to ramble. “We can negotiate terms, set up rules, anything within reason to ease their guilt and your terror.

“And this way, you have a real chance,” he finished. “Think on it, won’t you?”

It seemed to be an earnest request, but Virgil’s mind had done enough rapidfire processing for one day, and was now thoroughly shutting down.

Good thing he didn’t have to worry about thinking while unconscious.

#sanders sides fic #sanders sides g/t #whump #angst #antagonist logan #theyre all antagonists to virgil ngl #ts logan #ts patton #ts roman #ts virgil #paats #pull apart at the seams #i started this fic back in october 2019... how nostalgic #also SORRY this is posted late i forgot yesterday was saturday #my writing

[yourwildsimp]

sweet confessions

includes: aizawa, y/n

warnings: mentions of nightmares

length: 1,986 words

summary: with neither of you able to sleep, trapped words are finally allowed to slip like melted butter.

Four in the morning was not the time to be up, especially on a work night. Well, a workday at this point. You should be in bed, surrounded by the fluffiest, warmest blankets on the softest mattress you could afford.

And yet? Here you were in the bathroom, washing your face with warm water, for what was the third time in a row. It was as if you were trying to slowly drown yourself. A yawn left your lips, strong enough to rock your body with violent yet satisfying shudders. You cursed your insomnia. You knew you were tired, so why couldn’t you fall asleep?

Something clattered in the kitchen, a hushed swear which broke the stillness of the shared apartment soon followed.

Was he up, too?

Your face heated up at the thought of your roommate. There had always been a spark between the two of you, but both of you dodged any confrontation. It was like fate danced you both around each other, curious to see who would take charge. Who would finally end this little game of cat and mouse? You didn’t think you had enough confidence to be the one to put a stop to the games you were playing and admit how hard you’ve fallen for him.

However, as life tugs you both along, curious things unfold.

You cracked open the bathroom door to peep out, holding your breath in case he was just outside. This was new to you, as Aizawa was typically asleep for as long as he could be. His record is 19 hours straight after a hard mission. Your record was nine hours, and you were damn proud of yourself for it, too.

You carefully stepped out after turning off the light, trying to creep back to your bedroom without getting caught. It’s not like you wanted to avoid Aizawa, you just didn’t want him to catch you up this late again. Though as soon as you took your first step out into the hallway, he spoke, the words making you freeze like a deer in headlights.

“What are you doing awake at this hour?” You swallowed around the lump in your throat as you stood straight.

“I thought you didn’t know I was up,” you said with a grin, but Aizawa could see how tired you were.

“I’m a pro-hero,” he hummed, a coffee mug warming his hands. “It’s almost insulting that you thought I didn’t notice you. Now, why are you up?”

“I could ask you the same thing, Mr. Pro-hero,” you retorted, earning a worn chuckle. The distant look in his eyes told you everything you needed to know to understand why he was awake as well.

Nightmares.

You knew all too well that Aizawa’s night terrors were a force to be reckoned with. On some nights he even woke up screaming or falling out of bed. Aizawa’s dreams were the only thing that could get such a strong reaction from him.

“Drinking coffee this late can’t be good for you,” you said, changing the subject rather quickly while you headed into the kitchen with your roommate. “Doesn’t a hero with your status need to stay healthy?”

“It’ll keep me up,” he murmured with a strange sort of solemnness infecting his tone.

You couldn’t stop the empathetic look from tainting your face even if you wanted to. You hated nothing more than watching as the hero business ate away at your best friend.

“Hey.” His voice took you from your thoughts. “We’re already up this late, and I doubt either of us will sleep soon, so. . .” Aizawa trailed off as you looked up at him. “So, come sit on the roof with me. Only for a bit.”

Your jaw nearly dropped to the floor before you caught yourself and nodded. You hoped that you didn’t look too head over heels for him, but little to your knowledge, Aizawa found your reaction cute.

“Sure, alright,” you said with a small smile, trying to sound nonchalant. You didn’t, but Aizawa didn’t comment on it, sparing your pride. “Ah, wait, let me grab a hoodie-”

“Don’t bother,” he said, just loud enough for you to hear him.

A smirk tainted your lips as you crossed your arms over your chest and accusingly leaned towards him.

“Oh, so you want me to freeze? That isn’t very heroic, mister.” The way you raised your eyebrows got him to spill a chuckle.

“I do not. You can just wear mine."

Leaving the conversation at that, he turned away before you ever saw the pink hue that dusted his face. It took you a second to let his words process before you were following after him like a lost puppy.

It's not a big deal. He's just being friendly and giving, as always. That's the lie you've always told yourself.

“How do we get up on the roof?" You asked as he led you on the small back porch.

Your small smile dropped entirely as he jumped and grabbed the edge of the roof, pulling himself up with practiced ease.

"All right, asshole, not everyone is a pro-hero, so-" You cut yourself off as soft cloth suddenly wrapped around you, acting as a safety harness.

He lifted you to the roof without breaking a sweat. And to be honest, that boosted your confidence by a few points.

"Such foul language doesn't belong in a pretty mouth like yours," Aizawa murmured, his calloused hands carefully pulling his scarf off of your shoulders. He left the cloth on your waist for you to take care of, as he didn't want to overstep any boundaries.

The scarf was the furthest thing from your mind as you hoped the dark sky hid your heavy blush.

He said I was… Pretty. Aizawa… called me pretty.

"You, um…" You tried to start a conversation to distract Aizawa from the fact you weren't removing his scarf. "You got up here stupidly fast. Do you do this often?"

He didn't comment on the matter of his scarf, silently using it to justify why he was sitting this close to you.

"I'm a stealth hero. I'm always jumping rooftop to rooftop," he reasoned, heavy eyes taking in the ever so familiar landscape.

"That's not what I asked," you prodded gently. "Do you come up here often, this late at night?"

You wanted him to trust you, to tell you what was obviously plaguing his thoughts or what had scared him sleepless this time. You were well aware trust wasn't given easily, especially for someone like him. Someone who's been hurt time and time again.

His jaw shifted, and you were too concerned about his mental health to think of how handsome he was with his sharp features.

"Sometimes. When the dreams aren't incredibly terrible," he muttered after a thick swallow.

You hummed to let him know that you understood, your body shifting a minuscule closer to his warmth. He noticed, and without a word pulled his hoodie over his head. You two were sitting so close that you needed to lean to the side to avoid getting elbowed.

"Hey, what are you-"

He smiled gently as he set the article in your lap, and the sight alone shut you up. He was gorgeous, basking in the never-sleeping city lights.

"Didn’t I tell you? You can wear my jacket if you're cold."

Be still your beating heart, because if it didn’t soon, you were sure he'd think someone was knocking at the door with how loud it was pounding against your ribs.

With a painfully flustered chuckle to fill the silence, you put it on. And, God, you'd be content dying surrounded by his scent of heavy rain and the forest. A small thank you filtered off your tongue. Using the visual excuse of adjusting how it pooled at your hips, you shifted ever closer.

"You know-"

"Sometimes-"

You had both gone to speak at the same time, earning a soft giggle from you and a deep chuckle from him.

"You go first," you offered with a gentle smile.

"Only if you go after, no matter what," he playfully demanded.

As you agreed, you watched his eyes lingered on you, something indescribable dancing behind the walls of charcoal. With a deep breath, he faced the horizon.

"Sometimes when I drive, I'll turn on the radio. Just to have some background noise. I don't pay attention to it, though, because most of the music is shit," Aizawa started, something in his chest swelling as you chuckled at him. "But then, when I was sitting in the UA teacher's parking lot, something hit me as I listened to a sappy song."

"What? That you're getting old?" You teased, trying to break some of the tension in his shoulders.

"I realized that all of a sudden, every love song was about you."

Your soft gasp sounded like a nuclear bomb to him and he screwed his eyes shut. He knew he should've stayed in bed.

"I..." Aizawa moved to stand. "I should go back to sleep," he finished rather quickly.

Your nibble fingers gripped his pants leg and he froze entirely, like a child who’d been caught eating candy past midnight.

"Hey… What happened to our little deal?" Your caring tone caused him to hesitate. "Please, Shouta, won't you hear what I have to say?"

Shouta. How pretty it sounded rolling off your tongue.

He swayed in the morning breeze, the very beginning of a sunrise highlighting his dark features. And then he sat, avoiding looking at you at all costs.

"As I was going to say before I was thankfully interrupted," you began, adjusting the sleeves of your (his) jacket. You took a deep breath, hyping yourself up to finally fess up as he did. "You know when you look at a kitten, you think of Shinsou? Or when you see candy apples, you think of Eri?" You asked, earning a stiff nod.

"Everything has started reminding me of you. From sleep bags to your favorite dark chocolates, and baggy clothes like the ones you rarely allow me to borrow, or a coffee mug you'd like. You're always running through my mind," you took a breath, needing to get some air after your fast-paced rant.

You both sat in heavy silence, the dew in the grass glinting from the rays of marigold that poured over the horizon.

"Can I do something stupid?" He asked quietly, shifting in his spot.

" 'Course. It's about time we swapped roles," you humored.

Smokey-colored eyes bored into yours as he faced you, Adam's apple bobbing as he gulped. You'd never seen him so… beautifully revealing.

Suddenly you were surrounded by warmth, Aizawa no longer looking at you. He hugged you so desperately, it was as if he thought you'd leave him. He scruff tickled your neck as he nuzzled into you, but you couldn't care less.

The way you didn't need to think twice about returning the hug made him smile against your skin. You both sat there on the roof, basking in rays of fresh morning sunlight, never letting go of each other.

"It was about losing you," Aizawa breathed, breaking the blissful silence. "My nightmare… In it, I had lost you forever."

You closed your eyes, one hand tenderly massaging his scalp with the other held him closer to you. "I'm right here, Shouta. I'm not going anywhere," you reassured, feeling his breathing pattern calm. "You know that, don't you?"

"Yeah…" He whispered, voice heavy with sleep and concern.

"Let's get back to bed, okay?" You murmured, feeling the weight of your feelings change from suffocating to soaring.

"Not yet. Please… I just wanna stay with you." Aizawa pulled you impossibly closer and you smiled.

"Whatever you wish, but don't blame me when you're sore tomorrow." You felt him chuckle as his eyes drooped shut.

" 'm always sore anyways."

#comfort #aizawa #aizawa x reader #aizawa x you #mha fluff #boku no hero fluff #poor baby really just needs a hug