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daisy116 · 4 years

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Wtf is a Selfie??

some dousy fluff/ anst for my favs. it’s been sooo long since i’ve written but i worked really hard on this and i hope y’all like it!

please give it sum love and/ or feedback <3!

The team was getting ready for their goodbye dinner together. Just one last night of dinner and drinks, and then they’d go their different ways.

Daisy was obviously feeling emotional, and Sousa knew this. He came to check on her in her room.

He stood outside her door, took a deep breathe, and, in classic Danial Sousa fashion, knocked.

“Come in!”

When he opened the door, her back was to him, and she was struggling with the zipper on her dress.

“Here. Let me help you with that.” he came to help her.

“Oh. Thanks Sousa.” Daisy said. She felt her cheeks turn red.

Sousa hadn’t realized how nice she looked. Her blond hair was in loose waves down her back, and when she turned to face him, he saw she was wearing eyeliner and mascara that made her brown eyes pop. Blush tinted her cheeks.

They locked eyes, and she looked at the floor shyly.

“Thanks”, she practically whispered. Dammit why couldn’t she just act normal around him.

There was an awkward silence. Daniel looked around her room as she studied the floor.

After a moment, he brushed past her to look at the bedside table.

“Who’s this?” he asked.

Daisy followed his gaze. Sitting on her bedside table were three different picture frames and a jewelry box.

The largest picture was a frame hanging on the wall behind the table, the two others sitting in front of it. One was a picture of Daisy and Coulson, beaming at whoever the cameraman (or woman) was. The picture looked fairly recent.

Sousa had picked up the smaller frame. It was an older picture, evident by Daisy’s brunette and banged hair. The picture was obviously taken by someone else, and Daisy was looking at whoever might be to the left of the camera man. There was a man next to her, who was taller and older, and he was looking right into the camera. they were both wearing the same, almost sad looking smile. This is what first tipped Sousa to who this man might be. She took the frame from his hand.

“Cal” and after a beat, “my dad”.

Sousa, in all honesty, didn't know what to say. Just a small “Oh.” spilled his mouth.

Daisy had never talked about her dad. She had told Sousa about her mom, Jiaying, but not much outside of the story that she had shared with him about her suffering at the hands of Whitehall.

“He um,” she was obviously trying to find the right words. Did she even want to go down this path with him?

After a moment of thinking, she said, “he killed my mom… to save me”.

Another “Oh” from Sousa.

“Daisy, I’m so sor-”

“No, it's fine. I-” she quickly blinked away tears, “it was a while ago.” there was a beat, and then,

“Plus it was nice to talk to her again. And I wouldn't have without you… you giving me a little push.” she was smiling fondly now. She put the picture back.

“About that. I was going to apologize. i feel bad, i could tell it was hard for you and then what happened next-”

“No, no. i-” she turned to smile at him. “I was glad.” she reassured him.

She hadn't realized how close they were to each other. “Thanks for that”, she said in a whisper.

Their eyes locked, and she could feel herself blushing under his gaze. Her back ended up against the table, him facing her and the rest of the pictures. He was smiling at her, they were moving closer to each other, Daisy looked down at his lips, and-

“Is that the rest of the team?” he wasn't looking at her anymore, but in fact the largest picture frame hanging on the wall behind her.

She sighed to herself and closed her eyes.

In it was a picture of the team, Coulson, May, Jemma, Fitz, Yo-yo, Mack, a taller woman, and another man were all beaming at the camera. Again, Sousa could tell the picture was older from Daisy's hair, which was now in a dark bob. She was standing in the middle of everyone, holding the camera.

“Uh yea,” Daisy smiled to herself about how awkward he was. What a dork.

“That's Bobbi. And that's Hunter.” she said, pointing at the respective characters.

“They were all part of SHIELD at one point. We were pretty close.” she was smiling fondly now.

She snapped out of her memories that flooded back to her to glance up at Sousa, who, to her surprise, was studying the picture intently.

She looked at the picture, then back to him, then back to the picture again, trying to figure out what was irking him.

“Whatt are you looking at?” she said, a teasing tone in her voice.

“How was this taken? Are you holding the camera? Wouldn’t that be heavy?”

She tried her best to stifle her laugh. She felt bad giggling at him, but she couldn't help it, he was such an old man.

“Uhh yeah. It's called a selfie. Here, i’ll show you.”

She took her phone out of her back pocket and opened the camera app. She held the phone up and moved closer to him in order to fit them both into the small frame. She blushed as she felt his hand snake around her waist.

“Smile,” she told him

With a *click* she had taken the picture. She brought the phone down to inspect the selfie to her liking.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sousa do the same. Again, her face filled with heat as she felt how close he was. His hand was still around her waist.

“We look-,” he hesitated to find the right word, “we look good.” and a pause,

“You look good”.

She blushed. Hard.

“Thanks”, she said, smiling up at him. Their faces were once again close to each other, and the spot where his hand reached touched a bit of skin on her waist seemed to be on fire. Again, they leaned closer. She wanted to kiss him so bad she could scream-

“Hey guys were about to- ohhh what's going on in here!?” Came a British voice from the door. Simmons.

Sousa quickly ducked his head to hide his smile. Daisy turned to face her, embarrassment written all over her face. But she was smiling.

“Yea uhh. We’re about ready.” she said as she busied herself finding her necklace on the table next to the picture she had just put down.

Simmons backed out of the door to leave, sharing a smile with Sousa. He was also obviously a little embarrassed, but a quick wink from the doctor reassured him.

He smiled at the floor. He was glad he had found some friends in this weird place. Plus he had met Daisy, which was obviously going well-

“Do you think you could help me put this on?” Daisy asked him.

“Course.” he answered.

Even when their hands touched when slipping the necklace between them Daisy’s stomach flipped flopped. She turned around and moved her long hair out of the way.

He clasped the necklace around her neck.

She hurried herself with getting her shoes on, and Sousa struggled to put what he wanted to say to her in words. It took Daisy to get to her second shoe (white nike air forces, very practical) until he spoke.

“I know you've been hurt and i- i just wanted to let you know that i'm here for you. To talk i mean.” he mustered out.

She paused, still looking at her shoelace. Shit he thought. He had gone too far. Too fast. Too fast.

She finally looked up at him. God why was it so hard to read her facial expression. He had overstepped, he felt it-

She smiled. It was faint. But it was there. She stood and brushed herself off, shoelace forgotten. She paused before starting.

“Yeah its- its been a hard run these last couple of years. I've lost-” she paused to catch her breath- “I've lost, i don't even know how many people. People I care about. People i- i love.”

He glanced away at this. Mack had mentioned a boyfriend when they were talking about his own ex, Peggy, the other day. Lincoln, he remembered.

Before he could say anything else, she took a step closer. But instead of leaning in for a kiss, she put her head on his shoulder. A hug. That she desperately needed.

He hugged her back and closed his eyes. He desperately needed this. They had both gone through a lot, their hearts were worn. But they had each other, and they were grateful. They stood there for a minute, but it felt like seconds until they were interrupted, again.

A loud pounding came from the door, making them both jump.

“Come on guys, no funny business. We need to go soon.” it was Mack.

Daisy rolled her eyes and she pulled away. They both giggled, and she went to her closet for a purse.

When she had gotten all her things together, she reached for the door handle.

“Daisy, wait.” Sousa called after her.

“Yeah?” she turned to smile at him.

“Uhh. your shoes untied” he smiled down at it.

“Oh! Thanks.” she laughed in embarrassment.

She swooped down to tie her shoe, and when she straightened up, he was standing closer then he was before.

Without a word, they leaned in to kiss.

Their lips met softly, and she hardened it by leaning in.

She got lost in his lips, his touch. She closed her eyes and forgot about the world, the dinner, mack and simm- shit. The dinner.

She reluctantly pulled away.

“That was nice,” she said, her eyes still closed, “but we need to go.”

“Right.”

They walked out of her room, hand in hand. Both with a giddy smile on their faces.

#agents of shield #daisy johnson #daniel sousa #daisysousa #dousy #agents of shield ending #chloe bennet #enver gjokaj #daisy johnson fic #dousy fic #agents of shield fic #gif by me

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aeligsido · 3 years

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🌗 💕 🌍 🎤 for the ask <3 <3

THANK U SO MUCH FOR THE ASK!

🌗 fluff or angst?

why it is always fluff or angst but never hurt/comfort????? i want my hurt/comfort guys that's all i ask,

(angst)

💕 favorite ship to write?

iorhfui honestly i don't think I have a favorite ship to write?? like, in general i like writing ship and i find them all interesting to write odifh it depends how much i like this particular ship i guess????

🌍fave type of au to write?

uuuuuh... any au? no but really, they all can be interesting as long as i have the ideas to go with it odfih

BUT in general i like modern au/no capes au (depending on the fandom), i also like fantasy au veeery much. I recently discovered my love for some fairy tales au (wait, not so recently actually now that i think about that)... like all of that is so much fun to write. AND!!! the worldbuilding!!! i love the worldbuilding!!

so, yeah. i'm staying with these one!

... except if canon divergence works..... i do like writing about it....

🎤fave line in a fic you wrote?

oh seriously i had to go find a fic and a line odufhu

SINCE IT'S LIKE THAT HERE I'LL PUT MORE THAN ONE

“So,” said Ashley, swallowing hardly on her breath. “You have two moms, and a dad. It's nice.” Not what she expected, but not unheard of.

“Five,” corrected Lian.

“... Five?”

“Yes. Five dads.”

I just really like this one bc it's very funny to me. It's from one of my WIP called "titans' babies vs the world", and in this one you have Lian talking about her parents lmao. Talking about that, here's Bobby talking about their parents as well:

“Yeah. The one who was with dad before, the dad who's Mar'i's dad dad and kind of mom's twin – or, well, they tell everyone they are even if they aren't really, I don't know, it's complicated – and now mom is with mom and they love each other very much. Like dad love mom and mom but in another way, you know?”

If it's extra confusing, it's the point LMAO. I just love these kids so much.

Stephanie flourishes on the road, cheeks reds from the wind and smiling, hands calloused under the work, her bag still light on her hips. This curse is turning into a blessing, even if she doesn’t say it out loud, even if she barely allow herself the thought.

But, for the first time since her mother’s death and what she feels is forever, Stephanie is truly happy.

This one is from another WIP!! A Fairy Tale AU with Steph as the main character :D idk, i just really like the way it flows, maybe it's just me lmao

Dick led the way toward the gardens, keeping Kori’s hand in his. The moon reflected on Kori’s hair in a bright, eerie way. He loved it.

It wasn’t too warm outside despite the summer night; a light breeze was creeping around and chilling the air in a pleasant way. The stars were shining.

Dick still had a ring in his pocket.

listen i'm a romantic at heart... i just really like this part. AND YES it's also for another one of my WIP. Well technically not WIP since it's finished but on its way to be betaed lmao

The last time Tim had seen him was years ago, when Jason was still Robin and Tim a stalker following the Batman and his allies. In his death, he somehow managed to grow up to be tall and bulky, towering close to Bruce’s height - and weight. All in all, Jason was terrifying, extremely competent, and there was no way for Tim to beat him in a fight.

After all, Tim knew that fighting wasn’t his strong suit, despite - or in spite - of all the training he had been put through. But, well, everyone said he had one thing for himself, and it was his brain. Or making wonderful plans on the spot, just like Kon told him two hours ago during their tag game. (That they won, for the record.)

Now was the perfect time to discover if Tim Drake could outsmart Jason Todd.

i just love it because it screams that Tim is about to do something very stupid lmao. AND!! this one is actually from a published fic, aka Checkmate :fingerguns:

“Because you’re Robin.” [...] “And Robin was me. My family colors. My name. I created it to honor my family - and by putting on this costume, you became a part of my family. You became mine, Jase. Not Bruce’s. Not anyone else’s. And you still are, will always be. Robins are a family, and Bruce has no say in that.”

Jason - Jason’s heart was breaking and healing at the same time, full of tiny shards of glass and soft bandages.

[...]

Jason never realized the consequences of being Robin, but this - being part of Dick’s family - was probably the best of all. It was worth it - worth everything else.

listen i'm extremely emotional about Jason and Dick and especially this fic. Anyway, it's from A Nest of Love and Robins, this one is posted too!

Wally missed it, sometimes. Missed the thrill of being Kid Flash, of being a Titan, of fighting and having movie nights with his best friends. When he looked at Bart, at Conner, at Cassie, at Cissie, at Tim – Wally wondered whose legacy they're carrying on. Of course, people automatically thought it was the Justice League's ; but Wally watched them and remembered and thought, 'Maybe they got it from us, maybe they're our legacy'. And that was a weird thought – because the Titans had never been about having a legacy or being one, but always been about being a group of friends and becoming a family in between two punches and a slice of pizza.

this one make me emotional too. I honestly don't have anything better to say, i just... really love the whole things. It comes from Watch Your Past!

Okay now last one but i'm really in love with this whole fic and yes i know i'm the one who wrote it and????

But- It was nice, too, in it's own way. They grew up together, faced death and life together. They knew each other so much they couldn't really hide anything, and sometimes it felt like they were an extension of his own soul.

He had thought, once upon a time, that maybe he was a tiny bit in love with his best friends. He loved them more than anything, after all; that didn't really change, he just added more people to this category. Their children. His siblings.

It hadn't been true, though – not entirely. Because if his interest in them wasn't romantic, it didn't mean he couldn't be in love with them. There are a lot of ways to be in love with people. Maybe it was just another one.

It didn't really matter, in the end, as long as they could stay together – in this life and the next.

[...]

They laughed, loud and clear – like all those years ago in Titans Tower or in the middle of a fight or standing proud against their enemies, mentors, whoever would try to go against them. They laughed, freely and with not a care for the world around them, like they still owned it after all these years. They laughed like they were young and innocent, ancient and tired, alive and free.

They laughed, loud and clear, in the same heartbeat and soul.

[...]

(Maybe they were all a little tiny bit in love, in the end.)

idk it's kind of poetic and full of feelz for me, so, yeah. It's from the fic home is where the heart settle, about the Fab Five!

AND THAT'S IT. Thanks again for the ask, ask list here!

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zaclittle · 3 years

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Movies

Hey here’s some movies I watched recently and some thoughts on how I felt about them, you know the drill!

Frank - This was a re-watch -- the movie was free on YouTube for a while so that was my lunchbreak for a couple days. (It’s not free anymore, and I just gotta say, the vicissitudes of the streaming economy are really rough on me, a person who takes forever to get around to watching things I want to watch. Half the time, by the time I sit down to finally do it, the movie is gone, off to some other weird streaming service like fucking Tubi or whatever. And it’s a drag knowing that some movies that I have seen and loved are only sometimes available to me unless I buy them, and even then, maybe not. Sometimes iTunes just isn’t working and you have to give up and watch another episode of Beat Bobby Flay, you know? And then what do you do once you’re out of episodes of Beat Bobby Flay? WHAT DO YOU DO?) Frank is still probably the best movie that exists about being in a band, and its central purpose -- obliterating the myth that you need to be emotionally damaged to be an artist -- is an important one. I only wish there was more music! The music of the (fictional) Soronprfbs is great and fairly unique and I have definitely incorporated a lot of screeching and weird synths into my music since this most recent viewing.

Ladybird - Very late to the party on this one! But it’s a great party! This movie is so funny and basically doesn’t fall into any of the “quirky” movie traps of the aughts that grate on me so much. No quirky teachers, just sad ones. Every character relationship is rich and fulfilling. Saoirse Ronan is wonderful in everything. Great movie, five stars.

Tombstone - Extremely very late to the party on this, though I think I saw it when I was a kid? It’s my dad’s favorite movie, which is why I watched it. If you still have a living dad that you talk to, ask him what his favorite movie is and then watch it. It’s a worthwhile exercise. Anyway, Val Kilmer is not only like, so intensely watchable and charismatic in this, but also -- Johnny Depp clearly stole his bit! Jack Sparrow is 80% Doc Holliday, at minimum. What else? I feel very compelled by Kurt Russell now that I am a dad. Kurt Russell is such a dad hero, right? I can see now why my in-laws, who love him, were so disturbed by The Hateful Eight. Great Bill Paxton performance in this too (RIP). Sam Elliott has been 70 years old for 30 years -- do we talk about that enough? It’s weird. Tombstone has a weird history in terms of its director getting fired and Kurt Russell serving as de facto director for most of the shooting schedule, which I think accounts for some weird time and logic jumps, but you can kinda roll with it pretty easily.

Always Be My Maybe - My friend Tiffany told me this movie made my friend Josh cry and I watched it with that in mind, sort of wondering which part it could be. He doesn’t seem like a movie crier to me, so that was interesting. Then I got absorbed in the story and I forgot all about it until a scene toward the end made me suddenly start to cry and I was like, “Oh, that must have been it!” (It involves the opening of a restaurant and it is a very touching scene.) This movie is charming! The cast is great. There’s a scene at a comically upscale restaurant that is hysterical--it’s a bit that has been done before, but gets me every time when done well.

The Assassination of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford - I did see this a few years ago, because it is my brother’s favorite movie and he gave me a DVD of it, but I don’t know if I actually finished? It’s very long and slow, and I probably didn’t have the patience for it back then. Luckily I do now (though it took me like a full week of lunchbreak viewing) because it’s really worth watching. The titular scene alone is staged in such an arresting way--fatalistic and tragic and somehow beautiful? The score (by Nick Cave!) is startling, and the cast (Mark Brendanawicz! Mary-Louise Parker! James Carville!?) is stacked. Great fun fact is that Brad Pitt insisted on that title -- would not allow it to be changed or shortened.

Chef - I don’t watch The Mandolorian, but it’s very satisfying to me that Jon Favreau is a hero to so many now because I have liked his movies and general vibe for a while. His “Chef’s Show” on Netflix, which is based on the skills and relationships he forged making this movie, is about, above all else, a love of creativity. And there’s an infectious enthusiasm to the original movie Chef, which is FINALLY on Netflix in the US. I’ve seen it before and I will watch it again! It is almost absurdly low-stakes and largely plotless, with cameo performances from Favreau’s big name pals and a lot of great John Leguizamo material. I have loved John Leguizamo since the horrible Mario Brothers movie I loved as a small child. He should be in more stuff. (I’m currently racing to finish Waco before it leaves Netflix on Jan. 15, and he’s great in that too!)

Happiest Season - How weird is it that this movie feels so much like “Lesbian Christmas Get Out” for most of its runtime? I was honestly expecting some horrific twist. In the end, the twist in this movie is that our heroine is not heading where we all clearly think she should be heading, and by that I mean between Aubrey Plaza’s legs. The twist is that there is not a twist, and in this particular context it’s a particularly cruel twist. Lots of fun and funny performances in this movie. I watched one episode of Schitt’s Creek and was like “uh, no thanks” but I get why people like Dan Levy. He’s great!

Stop Making Sense - This is the greatest action movie of all time. I mean that. Sure, it is technically just a concert film, but it features an absolutely staggering physical performance from David Byrne (who does all his own stunts!) and the entire movie is quite literally one gradually expanding setpiece. It’s like Mad Max Fury Road but with better music. I think the performance of “Naive Melody” in this movie might be the single-greatest live performance of a song ever.

Downhill - The Dean from Community co-wrote and co-directed a remake of the Swedish film Force Majeure, about a family on the brink of structural collapse after an incident at a ski resort. Normally, American remakes are broader and sillier, but this one is pared down. It’s less absurd, and less funny, and more focused on the creased, aged faces of Will Ferrell and Julia Loius-Dreyfus. It totally omits the ambiguous and vertigo-inducing conclusion of the original in favor of something a little less fun and a little more hopeful, if sort of startlingly direct. I would not say this movie is fun.

Dick Johnson Is Dead - The trailer for this movie makes it seem like a wacky look at mortality. It’s actually much more confrontational about how a person’s life begins to wind down and end. So you know, you’ve been warned! But it’s a worthwhile confrontation to have, even by proxy. I really liked this documentary but it’s definitely not for unwinding at the end of a long day.

Moneyball - There’s a lot of interesting stuff in Moneyball. Brad Pitt’s performance has that strange balance between calm and anxiety that he brings to all of his best roles. Aaron Sorkin’s rewrite on the script is pretty unobtrusive, like the dialog is good but not show-y. The score apes Explosions in the Sky and Trent Reznor pretty well. There are some dynamic choices made with sound (the audio cuts in and out in the baseball scenes, mimicking in the way Pitt’s character anxiously turns the radio on and off). But it feels oddly assembled, like some pieces are missing, and some tacked-on stuff (the song his character’s daughter wrote) distracts from the point. I had to talk through what the end of this movie was supposed to be with a friend, because it feels like it pushes in three too many directions and moods at once.

Wonder Woman 1984 - OK, so the first Wonder Woman movie, which is still very good, must have been kind of a fluke, huh? Every other DC movie has the same problems. Really rough expository dialogue, plot motivations that make more sense backwards than forwards, and bizarrely inconsistent special effects. There’s a lot to like in WW84! Chris Pine is so charming, as always! Pedro Pascal is mostly very effective, except for when his character has to basically scream exposition in the middle of a blue beam of light for like 20 minutes straight! There’s a flight sequence that dazzles in part because of its simplicity (kind of reminded me of the original Iron Man in that regard -- shoutout to Jon Favreau again). But overall, it’s kind of a mess! And Gal Gadot herself is weirdly underutilized in this. It feels like she’s lying on the floor for half of her scenes!

#movies

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tslasvegas · 3 years

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Episode 3: “UGH just rename Luxor to Loser” - Xavier

Well... that takes care of the Timmy problem... Love Timmy... Just didn’t know how our dynamic would be cus he was runner-up to the last survivor game I played which I won. Hm... Well...

That went well. There's nothing like a live video tribal to get people together. and stephen didn't react too badly. but i know now he won't work with me moving forward

I’m sorry I’m terrible at confessionals... So things are going well, I think we have a decent tribe but it is too soon to tell. I’m not a huge fan of creative challenges, at least from my previous game, I guess we will see how that goes. Most of the guys seem nice, still trying to feel everyone out.`

A 4-2 vote off is interesting. Someone is on the bottom for sure. Also, this next challenge is a creative challenge and when I do these solo I usually do really well. Hopefully I can channel that energy into a win for us here because two tribes are going to tribal. We’ll be down to 17 after this, so I’m not sure if we’d go into a tribe swap yet? Maybe 2 tribes of 8 with one person sitting out?

Oh hot dang, two tribes are going to tribal next time. Probably going to be us :( now it is time to make alliance chats!

....five seconds later

I suspect that after this double vote out that there will be a tribe swap. I hope I end up with Mo and Jaiden at least.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/17NPxKO_TKgqjNqsaWlbmlL0jgU36Aygi/view?usp=drivesdk

I really like this challenge. I feel confident about it but at the same time nervous that 2 tribes will be going to tribal. I really hope my tribe wins this one since I still don't know how the tribe feels about me. Wish me luck guys!

My tribe is not going to win this immunity challenge. Our nightclub is due just hours away and we have little nothing done. I am going to have to scramble soon.....I did nothing to help my tribe with the challenge, so if it is me that goes, I would understand

....five seconds later

Honestly, I want to keep Jaiden and Mo around because I feel closer with them than anyone else. I want to keep Kailyn around because she seems to make time for challenges. Everyone else I am okay with going home, Ben hasn't really done anything soooooo maybe him? Oof

If we lose, then it's 2/3rds my fault and 1/3 Stephen. We better not be on the chopping block if we do lose. This is a two person Tribe as of now. Bobby Jon and Stephenie.

...five seconds later

UGH just rename Luxor to Loser

Second we lose Ben finally responded to my pm’s..... hm..... alright....

Y’all rlly won with a PowerPoint SKDJDJSKLALALL

Some of these guys have an excuse for not giving input into the challenge. Some do not. If I go home because some americans could be bothered doing some base level discussion, ill be annoyed. If I go home because a tribe threw a challenge because they thought id be an easy vote, ill be pissed.

youtube

All that hard work that went into this challenge really paid off! We scored the best and don’t have to attend tribal!! Which is absolutely exciting! Andrew told me he wanted to work together which is rad. Livingston and I want to work together which is radder. And Joey and i want to work together which is raddest. I haven’t spoken too much with Jeff lately even though we talked quite a bit early on. Pat and I speak occasionally. Stephanie and I didn’t really speak at all until recently but we’ve gotten into a good groove the last few days. I’m feeling pretty good about this game so far. I hope there’s no tribal swap or anything right away.

So when I get my chip total I'm gonna update Keegan. He is currently at a soap making class but I want him to know I am serious about working with him in this game and I think this is a good gesture. - keegan has let me know he has 4 chips and is willing to pool them over to me when we have enough so that we can unlock the store. I let him know I am okay with doing the same thing to him, whichever. But yes this is looking HOT for me. - "what's in the store?" | all i can really assume is advantages. we need 10 chips to unlock it. This is very similar to the Unnamed Season but the betting cap gives us more control. At this point, I don't think anyone can mathematically unlock without pooling chips. Keegan and I just need 1 more chip between us. Let's just hope we aren't separated by a swap or some shit. I am hoping for a bit more time on this amazing tribe to get that set up so I have a good idea of what the store holds.

We lost again!?!?!?!?!??! I am so surprised? Nah I'm kidding, but I don't care. I don't blame our team for losing because 3/5 of us were panicking because our president could be a cheetoh. I'm voting Stephen tonight, I hope the others follow suit. It SHOULD be simple, but 9 hours is a long time for Survivor; and if he knows it's him then might run around and create some chaos - which would be funny.

Rachael (love her she’s probably who I’m closest with along with DeNara and Kailyn) is not being subtle about the fact that she either has a pre-existing friendship with Ben or is currently aligned with Ben. Because Ben, from my knowledge has not been social with anyone, nor has he been super active and in our alliance chat with Kailyn, Rachael seems uncomfortable with the fact that Ben is said to be the vote and is saying she would prefer someone else to go. But like c’mon you can’t deny he hasn’t been social, and even if I had a friendship with somebody before a game, if they aren’t active I’m voting them out. Also I lied to my tribe a couple times this round because I’m lazy.

UGH. We LOST the challenge!!! And it wasn't even close *grumbles angrily* But it's okay. I'm gonna have to work my pussy out to this entire tribe to make them keep me around! I feel pretty good about this, I believe the target is leaning towards Ben but we'll have to wait and see. I don't think it's possible rn but I'm hoping for a swap soon so I can feel a little more re-energized in this game because my tribe has been super quiet lately... I think people will try to move the vote around so I'm going to use my current lack of employment as an opportunity to make myself stay alive on this tribe lmao

These guys are being super boring and either Jake is dumber than i thought, or shadier than i gave him credit for. Xavier might be trying to play me but regardless its doubtful ill stay. John seems to have the most chance of winning out of these four as hes not overplaying. Kevin hasnt spoken to me since the colin vote and it pisses me off that I might be going home after being one of two people that worked on the challenge when kevin was taken off the chopping block immediately for playing jeopardy. i hate this tribe.

....five seconds later

Johns out, Jake too by the sound of it. Time for plan B, which never works but might as well try. Fake idol time.

Oof well the uhh, “obvious friend group” has picked their target and it just so happens to be the only person I’ve made an actual alliance with :/ Poor DeNara. I really didn’t want to have to vote her off this early if I didn’t have to and then the worst part is she didn’t even hear it from me. Nobody is even mentioning game right now and Rachael is acting legitimately surprised to me when I came to her saying “okay this is an easier vote than I thought”.. even tho Ben claimed he had already talked to her..?? Idk man I must’ve done something wrong along the way but these people LEGITIMATELY don’t talk to me. My instant reaction is leaning towards being bitter but bitterness doesn’t really get me anywhere :/ I feel kinda.. out of it rn emotionally just because of everything else I have going on so if I seem more reserved tonight at tribal than usual, that’s why. I just hope that I’m not still stuck on that damn mountain rolling my dumbass rock back up only to get knocked back down again. I’m remaining optimistic for the future.. let’s keep winning some challenges mmkay

Okay good news, I shouldn't be leaving. But that being said DeNara, you have goT TO PULL. YOURSELF. TOGETHER. She's packing her bags and from my knowledge she's going to be fine tonight. Hopefully it'll be Ben who's going but DeNara giving up like this isn't helPING.

....five seconds later

Also I am in two alliances which is cool I guess.

Oops....... and now I'm controlling this vote I think :) It feels good. I don't know what my plan is !! I'm lying to everyone. I basically put myself in a position to be the 4th person in both votes and I love it so much. I keep telling ppl I'm an emotional mess and I think I'll milk that because SOMEONE is going to get betrayed tonight... love that for me. Rachael, Nik, and Ben want to vote out DeNara Mo, Kailyn, and DeNara want to vote out Ben And tbh I would prefer Rachael or Nik!! Since neither of those things are happening I guess it's up to me to decide which way I wanna swing... I hate/love myself for this. I think there are good cases for both people to leave, because I think that getting rid of DeNara strengthens bonds I never had with Rachael and co. while getting rid of Ben just makes me their enemy. Honestly I am starting to lean towards getting rid of DeNara for that sole purpose alone. It'll be messy for sure. Ben provides NOTHING to the game right now and I hate the fact that he announced in his intro that he's just here to backstab people... but villains don't win unless they're sitting next to another villain. He's the goat to me and Rachael right now, but pretty homos like me always win xx I might regret this decision down the road but HOPEFULLY whichever side I take will pay me back in protection down the line. I think I have the charm to smooth shit over w Kailyn and Mo but its up for determination. I think that I have the finesse to beat Rachael in a vote, too, but I don't want to put her back up against the wall just yet..... ;) Anyways... I hope this isn't my last confessional. I wasn't having fun until I found my place. Let's get it on.

It is me or Ben tonight. Guess we will find out who...

0 notes

roughsexwithgaga · 4 years

Text

Rough Rider

”Thanks,” Bo said to the bartender and took the two glasses off the bar counter and turned around.

”Where did she disappear off to now?” she mumbled and looked around the crowd gathered around the pool bar. It was late in the afternoon but people weren’t that loud yet. When the alcohol somehow made people deaf so they had to raise their voices. It was probably what made her hear the familiar nasal laughter over by one of the circular islands inside the pool.

Bo held the glasses above the water and turned in the direction of the noise. Lady Gaga stood in the shallow part of the pool together with a man Bo had never seen. Her friend seemed to be very entertained and turned her shoulder towards the man and tilted her hip. Was she flirting? Of course she was.

The unfamiliar man put his hands on Gaga’s back and moved them down her shoulder blades. Gaga turned her head and peeked over her shoulder to see what he was doing. Bo started walking towards the couple and realized she had to walk through a deeper area to get to them. As she approached them she overheard their voices.

Gaga chuckled something and moaned. ”Oh my god, hun, you’re hired.” She smiled and bent her neck and his hands moved up to her nape. The whole scene was very intimate and the petite, tanned woman had a facial expression as if he actually had his hands somewhere else. The water licked her smooth thighs and she looked up when she heard the sound of someone approaching them.

”A friend of yours?” the man asked Gaga and smiled towards Bo.

”Bo! This is Colin, he’s a physiotherapist. I think he just gave my back an orgasm.” Gaga’s voice was suddenly lighter. She turned to face them both and bent forward to dip her hands into the water, making sure she pressed her tits together to reveal a cleavage.

”Nice to meet you, Colin.” Bo smiled and turned to Gaga. ”You have the most annoying habit of disappearing. Like looking after a 3 year old.” She held the glasses in front of her and Gaga relieved her from both drinks.

”Thank you, I love you too,” Gaga said and pouted at her. Then she turned to the man she called Colin again and gave him one of the glasses.

The man looked at Bo and nodded. ”Nice to meet you, Bo,” he said and smiled. He was fit, wore pink shorts and had short cut dark brown hair that was a little longer on top of his head. Right now it was messy and wet. ”I’m sorry, I think she gave me your drink.” He started to give it back to Bo, who shook her head.

”Oh no, it’s OK. Take it, I’ll go get another one.” She smiled and put her hands up and gave Gaga the I-know-exactly-what-you’re-doing-look before she started wading back to the bar. She overheard Gaga cooing something like ”I think I know you now” and then more laughter. Bo wouldn’t be surprised if the opening had been something like ”your shorts match my hair”. She scoffed out a laugh and cleared her throat to not seem weird laughing for herself.

When she arrived back at the bar, Bobby asked her where LG was and Bo turned around to point in the direction where she was, only to find the spot empty. ”She was there like 10 seconds ago.” For a brief moment she was worried, then she thought OK, why the fuck not. Let the woman breathe. ”She was talking to someone named Colin,” she decided to add and gave up scanning the shady areas under the palm trees for a green leopard print bikini and pink hair.

Bobby raised his eyebrows and looked along the pool edge but couldn’t find her. ”I’ll go look for her,” he said and walked towards the stairs.

”I see her,” Bo said and pointed. Gaga ducked under a green plant and disappeared into the hotel. ”She’s probably heading to his room.”

Bobby gave Bo a side eye and said, ”She’s probably heading to the bar.”

”Again? I just brought her two drinks.” Bo didn’t know whether to laugh or not. The woman was like a sponge.

”Are you jealous she’s abandoned you for someone with more muscles?”

”Oh shut up, I just don’t trust her around any guy right now. When she’s single she’s unbearable.” Bo frowned.

Bobby had to tell himself that no one was gonna kidnap her and that she should be able to have fun. And if she found someone who didn’t behave like she was an alien, then good for her. It was hilarious to see her trot after the man, who looked over his shoulder and noticed that she followed him. He stopped and smiled at her just before they disappeared through the opening into the shaded area inside.

Bo saw where Bobby looked. ”Wonder what made her interested,” she said.

”He probably gave her a compliment,” Bobby said.

…

Gaga had decided that Colin was really funny and found him extremely attractive. He had a dimple on his cheek when he smiled and the dark shade on his chin revealed that he had not shaved today. His eyebrows moved up on his forehead every time she said something funny as if he was surprised that she had a sense of humor.

Colin stood by the bar and ordered two shots and two more margaritas. The tiny woman next to him and could barely see over the counter. She smiled when he looked down at her and it was an amazing smile. Her eyes looked into his and she seemed interested and curious.

Colin suddenly felt like he was out of breath she noted how he took deep breaths. She looked at him like he was the most fascinating person on the planet and was amused by the affect that it had on him.

The bar inside was nearly empty at this time of the day. Most people preferred the pool area or the beach. In just an hour or so it would be crowded. She could smell food being prepared and realized she was actually a little hungry and stood on her toes reaching over the counter to make an order to the bartender while Colin took their drinks and prepared to head outside again when. He waited a second until she joined him.

Her skin was tanned and without a single flaw. She felt good, in shape and relaxed. It was a good day in general and she was happy. She liked the feeling when he looked at her. He paid attention. The shot glasses were full up to the brim and she balanced one in each hand as she walked over to him.

”But are you here alone?” she asked.

”No, I’m here with friends, but they’re on a day trip and won’t be back until late,” he said and stopped when she didn’t follow him.

She held out the shot to him, then she paused and squinted her eyes. ”Why didn’t you join them?”

He pointed at his knee and she noticed a long red scar by the side of it. ”I have recently had knee surgery. So I couldn’t join them. They’re visiting a couple of caves. If it wasn’t a long trip I would’ve joined. But I don’t want to make them feel bad.”

She inhaled and was about to ask if he played football, but he smiled as if he could read her mind and said. ”No, not football, skiing. Landed and twisted my leg after a stupid jump. I guess I’m not 20 anymore.”

”Tell me about it,” she sighed and then raised the shot glass. ”To broken bones,” Gaga smiled and turned the glass upside down over her mouth. The liquid burnt its way through her throat and spread a warmth inside her belly.

She wiped her lower lip and looked up at him again. ”Couldn’t your friends have chosen another activity?”

He laughed and smiled. ”I thought so too, right?” Then he stroke his head with his hand like he was embarrassed for his selfish friends. ”It was an invitation. We accepted. I’m OK with it. If I went I wouldn’t have met you.” It seemed like his cheeks turned red, or it was the alcohol. He looked at her with a raised brow.

”I wanna introduce you to my friends.” She walked closer and put her hand on his shoulder to pull him down towards her face, then she kissed the corner of his mouth and felt the slight shiver inside her gut when he moved his face to meet her lips. Her kisses were soft and gentle. He moved his hands to her shoulders and down the arch on her back. Her skin was warm and the tiny hairs felt sensationally soft against fingertips. After a few seconds he nearly felt her tongue and then she suddenly pulled away.

”Not bad,” she said and sucked her lip. ”Let’s go.”

”…OK.” Colin furrowed his brows and wondered if he had done something weird.

She took his hand and pulled him back outside. His hand was warm and dry and when his fingers stroke against her palm and she wanted him to touch her like he wanted her. She hated being the odd one out while everyone else had someone to cling to.

Sure enough, she could find anyone and have their attention for a while. But most of them didn’t know how to act, or treated her badly. Colin had looked at her like she was a woman and a person, someone to have fun together with. He wasn’t too muscular, more athletic and not too tall. He had a half sleeve tattoo, a large rose and what looked like a mechanical lion spreading over his shoulder to his back. She didn’t look that hard, just noted that it was there and it added to her being interested.

They approached Bo and Bobby in the pool and Gaga introduced Colin to Bobby and then pulled her newfound interest over to a table next to them. Colin hated to stand in the water by the pool bar. People drinking and standing in water, you just knew what was going on the more they drank. He decided to let Gaga have her way for now. It was nice to spend time with her and she seemed to enjoy having him around.

A steady flow of other people gathered around the tables and Gaga introduced them all to him. They didn’t seem to think that it was weird she brought an unknown man into the group so he listened to them all talk memories and anticipations of what was gonna happen while they were here. Gaga had already told him she was there for her friend’s wedding. A friend that was also working for her and Colin found himself wondering if all these people worked for her in some way. They all seemed to treat her like some boss or royalty, but she was kind and attentive towards them all.

”I ordered a snack for us, because you’re so cute,” she said and smiled. ”Come.” She went to the edge of the pool to get out of the water and Colin sighed with relief. He watched her as she climbed out and went around the back to get a basket that was waiting on the counter for her. She swatted his hands away when he wanted to carry the basket for her.

Colin looked forward to spending time alone with her when she suddenly turned around and shouted at the other people that she was having a picnic on the beach and everyone should join. Colin sighed again, a lot heavier this time. He looked at the group of around 15-20 people throw their hands in the air and pull themselves out of the pool. Gaga pointed enthusiastically at the back of the bar where several baskets were placed and told them to grab them so they could all get on their way.

Shortly after Gaga trotted first in line on the paved patio down to the beach. It was a little windy and surprisingly empty but she took his hand and pulled him along. She struggled in the sand at first until they got closer to the water. The packed sand was easier to walk on and she put the large sunglasses she wore on her head on her nose instead.

She must love hearing her own voice, Colin thought, because she was never quiet. In fact he found her nasal, husky voice and laughter really sexy. When she talked it was like it hit something inside his gut that made him feel all itchy and tingly and he wondered if it was something in the tone of her voice or if he was falling in love with her.

He watched her from the side, noted her face looked bare of any make up, her lashes and eyebrows were dark and thick. The corners of her mouth slightly raised and the upper lip looked a little swollen. Her chin was tiny and raised. The huge loops she had in her ears looked heavy and expensive.

Her shoulders were pulled back and muscular. Her body looked amazing. She was soft, but her legs were definitely toned. Of course she was fit, the way she bounced around on a stage for 2 hours each and every night. It was also obvious she was taking care of her body. He had felt that when he touched her, even if she had made it clear she was in physical pain more or less every day. She had simply learned to live with it. It made him sad. She shouldn’t have to be in pain and he wondered how it really affected her. He took it she wasn’t always this happy.

”What are you working on right now?” he asked when she finally inhaled and had a brief quiet moment. He was curious about how a massive celebrity planned their career. She seemed like someone in complete control of every second of her life.

”You,” she said totally serious and that was the end of that discussion.

Colin eventually took the basket from her when he noticed that it hit her thigh with every step and she didn’t disagree this time. It seemed heavy and he heard bottles clink when he changed the grip. A picnic, he thought. Sweet. He turned his head and looked at the people scattered around the sandy beach. Not many looked at them passing. A couple lay on a blanket and only had eyes for each other. The wind had probably made some people leave.

After a couple of minutes of walking she seemed pleased and put her hands up in the air to signal to them to stop. He looked around. They had passed some large rocks and around them were a natural secluded beach. Some branches writhed their way to the beach made a natural shield towards people approaching. The whole group stopped and started unpacking the baskets and spread out the blankets that came along. They laughed and chatted loudly and a couple of them ran into the waves.

”You knew about this place,” Colin said and smiled.

”No,” she said. A little too fast. When he looked down at her she smiled wide. Her eyes became visible behind the glasses when she turned her head and they looked like gold. She sniffed and wiped her nose once. THE nose, he thought as he watched her pull out a blanket from the basket. She bent down and put it on the ground. She looked kind of adorable as she tried to spread it out as she was so tiny, and he helped her out, even though he enjoyed watching her move around and fiddle with whatever it was she was busy with.

Her hands were delicate and the veins swollen. She had nails that seemed designed to be lethal weapons, but he was afraid to ask how on earth she could do normal stuff with those. She stroke the sand off and sat down on her ass in the corner of the blanket and put the basket in front of her, then she looked up and tilted her head to the side, leaned forward and supported herself on her arms. Her face was really close to his and he felt her voice, more than heard it, against his cheek.

”I usually want to fuck first, but since we’re not alone… unless that is your kink?”

Colin felt like she drew her nails along his spine down to his lower back. Before he got to say something about how it was she who invited them all, she tossed her sunglasses away, put her hand on his nape and nudged her lips against his. It made him shiver. Her soft touch, her lips were so sweet and wet and hungry. She moved her head, opened her mouth and let his tongue stroke against her own. He became turned on instantly and moved closer, put his hands on her shoulders to feel her. She was soft in his hands, followed his lead and raised her chin when he kissed her neck. He noticed that she exhaled slowly and felt the fine hairs on her nape against his fingers.

When she noticed how he desired her, the scent of him made those tingling sensations she had all evening shoot right between her legs and make her belly jump. It felt like her skin shrunk and expanded at the same time. She couldn’t wait to get under him and feel his hands take off whatever tiny piece of clothing she was wearing. The sky was turning purple, and if Colin had looked there would be stars visible high in the sky as the sun started to set.

Gaga was warm, her body vibrated when Colin touched her. She raised her arms and felt his hands on her tits, on top of her bikini. She got on her feet and started pulling him towards the water. Waves rolled in and she felt the cold, wet sand between her toes. Making sure he got a view of her ass in motion she started adjusting her bikini bottoms. She knew exactly what it looked like when she thrusted her ass in his direction to amplify the ratio between her hips and waist.

She moved into the deeper water and lowered herself down until it reached her shoulders and waited for him. Colin’s semi hard bulge inside his shorts was very visible and she moved backwards to make it harder for him to reach her, until he eventually made a few strokes and swam up to her. His hands reached for her waist and pulled her closer to him. She put her hands on his arms, and felt how hard he was.

He laughed once when she grabbed his nape and put her forehead against his. “Got ya now, I’m never letting go!”

He noticed she had freckles on her nose and a dimple by her cheek on the same side that he did when she smiled. He was totally unprepared for this approach. He didn’t complain, he just didn’t think she would come on to him this hard.

Her eyes were glowing in the low sunlight, lighter than gold now. Like champagne, with bubbles and all. And just as intoxicating. She didn’t turn away, but looked straight into his eyes. He noticed she didn’t reach the ground so he wrapped his arms around her and felt her soft tits against his chest. The salty water dripped from his hair and ran down his face when she kissed him. She moved his hands to her waist and below her ass. He felt the smooth and round cheeks in his hands and got greedier. Moved his lips to her neck and collarbones. She pushed him away and lowered her chin and smiled, showing her rosy cheeks and white teeth, almost looking shy.

”Take me up to the blanket, sweetheart,” she said with her eyes glittering. And as he was not the one to say no to her and her wet, plump lips that widened into a smile showing her teeth, he obliged. He saw the tongue behind her front teeth and how the smile faded a little. She tilted her head to the side, and it looked like she sucked her cheeks and the jawline became more defined.

The whole time it felt like they were alone even if they were surrounded by people. The others had mostly left her alone with him, as if it was some agreement. He looked around the beach at the people she called her friends. Someone shouted something at them and Colin raised his chin to look. Gaga grabbed his face and made him look at her instead.

He let her go once the water was shallow enough and thought that she was heavier than she looked. She slipped down beside him and held on to his arm until they reached their spot. She laid herself down on the blanket and Colin followed her.

”You are so fucking hot,” he mumbled and she rolled over on her belly, face down. His hands stroke her back, up to her neck and he kissed her shoulder blades. It felt really nice how she gave him most of her attention while all these people that she knew so well were here. He in turn, only had eyes for her and he realized it suited her.

”Do that magic again,” she whispered and he let his fingers glide back down and pressed a few spots on her lower back that made her groan. Her ass was round and perfect and he let a finger slip along the fold between cheek and thigh.

”Oh, there’s that magic too,” she said and raised her head, rolled over on her side to face him.

She looked into his eyes. ”You’re gonna be really hungry.” Then she closed her eyes and parted her lips. He pressed his lips against hers, felt the salty taste of the water on her lips and then her tongue slipped inside his mouth. Her hands moved down his chest and belly and then he felt her nails swiftly stroke against the growing shaft inside his shorts. He heard her chuckle and knew she wasn’t disappointed.

He carried on, kissed her harder and moved his hand down to her butt. Took a firm grab and squeezed her butt cheek while he licked her ear and whispered how sexy he thought she was. The vibrations from his neck when he spoke made the hair on her nape stand up. She wormed out of his grip, put her arm around his shoulders and pulled him back on top of her. She was certain she had made a great choice, the way he kissed her and touched her. She felt herself float away and not wanting to say stop even if it got a little too steamy for a public beach.

He supported himself on his arms and felt her thigh stroke against his waist. Moving down, he kept kissing her body and her smooth legs rubbed against his back. He let his fingers glide against the waistline of the bikini and nearly forgot where he was as he started pulling them when she suddenly squirmed out of his grip. She decided he was a little too confident and it was only fun as long as she was in charge.

”Hey, ummm… what?” she muttered and sat up.

Colin raised his head and looked to his left. Bobby were standing there along with two others he didn’t remember the names of. It was obvious they had noticed how Colin got carried away with her and saw her struggle out from under him.

”Sorry, I-” Both Gaga and Colin said at the same time.

”Or get a room, maybe?” A tall guy with a beard said and raised his eyebrows.

”I wasn’t worried,” Gaga whispered to Colin when the others had turned away.

”I am worried,” Colin said. ”My heart is speeding. I can’t breathe. My skin is itching. I don’t know what is happening.”

She looked at him with that interested gaze again and then she understood what he meant. Moving a few loose hairs out of her face she pulled hair back into a bun on her head and smiled. She was flattered that she had his balls in a firm grip already.

He looked at her nape when she looked into the basket that contained nachos, different dip sauces, chicken wings and beers and a bottle of tequila. She dipped a chip in salsa and raised it to his mouth. Everything about her was perfect. Her hips looked wide when she sat down, like she spilled all over the spot where she sat - even if she was small. And he could barely take his eyes off her perfectly shaped tits inside the strapless top. They looked so soft and round and when she moved her arms around he envied her arms that stroke against them.

”I thought you said…”

”…after, yes. But since you’re so stiff.” She made a pause and eyed him with a smirk. ”I decided to feed you first.”

”Do you let all these people around you stop you from doing what you want?”

”Shut up,” she said. ”Open your mouth.”

He opened his mouth and let her put the food inside his mouth. They sat on the blanket, had nacho chips, drank tequila and kissed until she felt out of breath and the others wanted to continue the party at the hotel.

\o/

People were loud. The bar was too crowded. The man beside Colin had repeated the same story for the fifth time and laughed just as much each time. Colin tried to focus on a woman that tried to climb up on the bar counter to join her two friends dancing there, but failing miserably until someone from the security came and gently removed her. Colin sighed with relief. He was worried that she would hurt herself and she had also yelled at him when he tried to tell her she could fall off and end up hurting herself and others.

At some point during the evening he had walked back to his room to shower and put on clothes and when he came back out he had lost track of Gaga and her group. As he didn’t want to seem too obsessed he had walked around the pool and then sat down by one of the bars. He felt like he was sobering up, both from the alcohol and Gaga’s attention. She was incredible no doubt, but probably someone who’s company you had to enjoy while it lasted. No one could claim her. He assumed she had already found someone else and he already missed her so much.

…

Gaga walked out on the patio leading out from her hotel room to the massive pool area. She had put on a black dress with thin shoulder straps. It was a little too tight over her hips for some reason, but it looked nice around the waist and chest and frankly she could do with the dress hugging her ass and revealing every shape. She saw Colin almost immediately and let Bo know she would join them later and pointed at the man sitting by the bar looking bored.

Colin was drawing a smiley in the condensation on his glass when he heard a nasal voice by his ear and felt a warm hand on his arm.

”My room faces the beach.”

He turned his face and looked at Gaga. Her pink hair was let down. It reached her shoulders and looked soft, but frail. He looked at her face and noticed more and more things. She was beautiful, her eyes amazing. When she looked into his he felt like he couldn’t look away. It was like she locked gaze with him and enchanted him.

”You’re by far the most beautiful woman I ever met…” he said and loved that he was able to say it without making it sound cringy.

”Thank you, Colin.” She pressed her lips together and smiled. She had put make up on and her lips looked swollen and wet. Like they had grown since he met her and he realized it was some trick to that. She looked sexy either way. Even her eyes looked bigger and more hypnotizing. The green streaks glowed like neon.

…And one of the few who can take a compliment, he thought when she reached for his hand and they started walking away from the bar.

Gaga felt dizzy and warm, even if she had slowed down with the drinks since they left the beach. She clung to Colin and he put his arm around her back and smelled her hair. It smelled of warm sand and something flowery. Her forehead was completely smooth, and perfectly slanted, giving her a very distinct side profile. Her features were strong. Everything about her stood out. She looked like no one else.

…

”Here,” she said and pointed at a room at the corner of the hotel. The curtains were pulled and she approached to open the patio doors.

Colin let her go off her hand and watched her move further inside the large room. He saw a large couch and the opened doors leading into a bedroom before he turned around and slid the doors shut. When he turned around she was right in front of him with her glowing eyes and put her hands on his shoulders. He let her pull him down towards her face. With his eyes closed he felt her lips against his, softly forcing him to open his mouth and let her tongue glide between his lips. He felt the shivers down his spine and the warmth inside his gut spread down his groins. Never in his life had he felt like he was swept off his feet this way and he wanted more. More of the fireworks she set off inside him.

He kissed her neck and let his hands move to her nape. Caressed her shoulder and inhaled her scent to remember it forever. Her voice near his ear was telling him to carry on and she let her fingers run through his hair when he continued down and kissed her between her tits and moved his hands up to feel the their soft, round shape. The dress was so thin he wasn’t even sure it classified as clothes. Her nipples were hard and he could even sense the bumps around them though the fabric.

Colin got down on his knees kissed her belly. He caressed her waist and down to her hips. He started pulling the dress up along her thighs. Felt the tiny hairs against his fingertips and let his fingers nudge the thin lace thong she was wearing underneath. He made her turn around and started pulling the underwear down. The tiny piece slowly dropping from between her butt cheeks. Her ass really was amazing, plumb and round.

His warm fingers found their way between her thighs and she parted her feet a little so he could feel how turned on she was.

”I wanna taste you,” he mumbled and made her bend forward. He pulled her cheeks and placed his face between them. She nearly jumped forward when his tongue poked her slit, only to penetrate her the second after. The warmth filled her lower body, made her ache and drop her head between her tense shoulders. She held on to the couch, thrusted her ass out and felt him push his thumb against her clit while he rubbed it. His tongue was all over her bottom. His fingers slipped inside her while he lapped her tight butthole. The feeling was sensational and she wanted it more than anything right now.

She was pushed forward, turned around and was on her back on the edge of the couch. Colin kissed her groins and her belly. His fingers stroke down the insides of her thighs and he kissed his way down until he reached her labia. Parted her pussy lips using his tongue and kept teasing her holes with his fingers. He sucked her whole cunt inside his mouth and then used his tongue to tickle the blood filled sensitive pussy lips until she was on the verge of exploding. Her clit was so swollen it hurt and she literally didn’t know what to do with herself.

He climbed on top of her and kissed her belly while he pulled her dress up further until he exposed her tits. When the warmth disappeared between her legs she wanted to push him back down there. But he sucked a nipple, and she raised her shoulders from the couch at the tickling sensation. He pinched the pink nub between two fingers and when he was hovering over her again she let him pull the dress over her head and felt his hands glide along her arms until she was naked underneath him.

Her hands were on each side of his face, his body heat and scent teased every fibre in her body. She felt how her skin craved for him to touch her. His rough chin stroke against her cheek when he kissed her ear and neck. She arched her back, felt his hands on her tits and his thumbs rubbing her nipples. She raised her ass and wanted to grind against his thigh.

He let her little sounds guide him. Her moans and encouraging words. She told him what she wanted when he seemed to hesitate. Or maybe he didn’t hesitate. He just wanted to adjust to the fact that he had Lady fucking Gaga lying under him, telling him to drive his cock inside her and rearrange her internal organs.

He pulled his shorts down and revealed his heavy cock for a brief moment before he parted her legs to place his mouth over her soaking wet cunt again. The swollen pussy lips dripped of juices when he sucked her folds and let his tongue flick against the slit. He wrapped his arms around her thighs and pulled her closer so he could penetrate her. All her pink holes ached so much she started moving her hips as if she was riding his face.

He let her go and wiped his face before he unbuttoned his shirt and took it off. She sat up and pushed him backwards. He dropped down on his ass at the far end of the couch and she climbed up into his lap. Grabbing his cock by its shaft and keeping eye contact, she lowered herself down on his erect dick until she sat down fully against his pelvic bone. The size of him made her stretch a little too fast, and the pain darted through her guts for a brief second before she adapted. She wanted to feel his girthy shaft as it stroke the insides of her vagina again, before she got too wet and raised her hips.

Colin kept her gaze, and only briefly looked down to see his cock disappear inside her. She was tight and he could feel her muscles squeeze around the shaft when she started moving. Her hands rested on his chest and she raised her hips with slow movements. He watched her face, and noticed tiny twitches by the corner of her mouth as she started moving faster. He put his hands on her tits and closed his eyes, focused on not exploding inside her after just a few strokes.

His hands moved down to her waist and he started moving his hips to meet her. She was going too fast so he had to slow her down. The thrusts got shorter and she bucked her hips as if she had discovered an exact spot that she wanted him to ram against with each shove.

She rode him hard and her nails dug into his chest. The movements got faster and while she spat out all kinds of dirty words, the rough hammering of her lower body against his made wet sounds that was way louder. He had kind of pictured her as a rough rider and wasn’t surprised at all at how hard she fucked him, sitting on top and using him as she pleased.

”My god that feels so good,” she mumbled. ”Fuck!”

Colin pressed his butt into the couch and bit his lip when she suddenly flipped her leg across his chest to stand bent over in front of him. She grabbed the edge of the table and waited for him to penetrate her from behind. He put a hand on her waist, looked at the roses on her hip winding their way down and her flawless, round ass when he prepared to enter her again. He let his hand glide up her back to her neck, held her shoulder and pushed inside her. The rapid thrusts were short and hard. Gaga felt him pull her hair by the roots and her neck was strained. The orgasm exploded between her legs and spread along the insides her thighs, up through her gut.

She opened her mouth and tried to exhale but her throat felt clogged when her muscles spasmed. Her vagina contracted repeatedly around the dick inside her until she pulled away and slipped under him.

He could sense how she tried to focus on her own pleasure, how her face was a map of emotions and her hands and body guiding him to do what she liked. It was obvious she knew her body well enough to know what she needed from him. The feeling of her fingers slowly pressing against his hip to make him slow down, the slight tilting of her hips when she wanted a different kind of stroke. He had never had sex with a woman like her. The flavor, he thought. The power.

With his hands on each side of her waist he fucked her with long strokes, and she rode out her orgasm until she felt him grow inside her. She moved her legs up against his waist and moved her hips to decide the pace. The shoves got harder and shorter, he paused for a fraction of a second inside her like he wanted to stay in that exact moment for a while. Then he pulled out and pushed inside her again, and eventually came inside her.

The light chuckling sound from her neck when she saw how disappointed he looked. ”It’s OK,” she said and put a hand against his cheek.

”God,” he said with a muffled voice. ”I wanted to keep going but I just… I think you just squeezed it all out of me.”

”It’s OK,” she said again. ”The night isn’t over yet.”

Colin sat up and Gaga followed him. She pulled him closer and kissed him. His hands caressed her back and rested on her waist. Her skin was warm, smooth and slightly clammy. She was firm, but soft and her scent was lovely. Her lips soft against his. The taste was sweet and salty.

Eventually she let him go, picked up a robe and went into the bathroom. When she came out she had lit a cigarette and pulled the doors open. The breeze made her thin robe flutter and he observed her silhouette in the opening. She leaned against the railing and took long greedy drags on the cigarette. She asked him how long he was staying in Cabo.

”Does that mean you wanna do this again?” he asked.

”The wedding is tomorrow,” she replied. Avoiding his question.

”I’m going home on Sunday.” He sounded low. ”I know I’ll never see you again, but you are fucking fantastic.”

”Maybe I can sneak you in before you leave,” she said and turned around to face him when he joined her outside. Her smile was infectious and cute. ”And as I said, the night isn’t over yet.”

THE END

#Lady Gaga #fanfic #fanfiction

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doof-doofblog · 4 years

Text

"Not Your Day, Is It?"

Monday 15th June 2020

Good evening everyone! How are we all feeling this week knowing it's the final two episodes before the soap goes off air? I find it quite upsetting, yet quite excited for what's to come in the following weeks and also for when the soap will be back on air. I find it funny on a personal note, as I only started this blog in February which was kinda just before the whole coronavirus pandemic escalated, I had been toying with the idea for a while, and not long after I started writing, its revealed the soap will be temporarily be off air. Never mind, I guess I can also do throwback posts and maybe write about my favourite characters? That could be an option? What would you guys like to see me post during the time EastEnders will be off our screens? On a more lightened note, I do have a little bit of news, I'm sure that you've all been made aware now that the first people to be taking part in the documentary hosted by Stacey Dooley, will be Danny Dyer and Kellie Bright, also known as Mick and Linda Carter. I'm really looking forward to seeing what this documentary series all about, I'm looking forward to seeing all behind the scene footage! In other news, it's been revealed that EastEnders is set to go back to filming at the end of this month, with both cast and crew sticking to the social distancing guidelines, but when the soap returns to our screens later this year, the soap will return back to it's usual 4 episodes a week schedule but the episodes will be reduced to 20 minutes, this will only be temporary however until things can get back to some form of normality. I am so very happy about this news, I can't wait for when the soap comes back later in the year, I'm sure they will continue the current story-lines we are all really enjoying, I did a rumour that they were all going to start from scratch, but I believe it was just a rumour, nothing more.

Now then, shall we start talking about tonight's episode, let's start with Billy. I do feel for him, he's doing everything he can to keep Karen and Mitch is slowly chipping away making dips at him and winding up him. I do feel Billy will always belong with Honey, but it's not nice seeing someone take the mick out of him, sometimes Billy can be such a pushover and there are times I'm just wanting him to fight back, which to be fair, sometimes he does, but not always. I believe Karen does have feelings for Billy, there was that time that Mitch told Karen he loved her and she kinda pushed him away. Sure, they have children together, but since Mitch has been on the Square, Karen has never shown any kind of romantic interest in him. They have a history, which I believe Karen is happy enough to move on from and remain friends or even civil with him, but I feel that's all it is. Whereas with Billy, she's grown to know him and his kids and I feel she has genuine feelings for him. I do hope Karen will put Mitch straight and will show Billy that he is the one she's interested in. What do you guys think? Who do you think Karen should be with? I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Oh gosh, poor Chantelle! Gray just isn't believing her is he?! At the beginning of the episode I was surprised that Gray came clean about Whitney trying to kiss him, but then it came to the point where he was telling her just to make a point that he was being honest and telling her truth, making a dig at her that he doesn't believe her about not taking the car. It was clear Chantelle was deeply hurt by her friend, Whitney crossed a line that no one should ever cross. After all Chantelle had done for her, she must've felt like she had been stabbed in the back? I do hope in time Chantelle and Whitney will be able to reconcile their friendship. But, why do I fear that things are going to turn violent again? Even after Chantelle told Gray that she'd told Whitney to stay away and showing him her phone that she had been to the dentist and used the tube, he didn't believe her. Chantelle could tell the truth to Gray until she is blue in the face and he probably still wouldn't believe a word she was saying! I do kinda feel, without realising, that Ben has made it worse for Chantelle. He can't admit to Gray that he used his car in a dodgy deal, he's not going to admit that to anyone, no one can know about the job and the fact that Ben used Gray car, it's the last thing he wants to come out, but denying that anyone used his car, it's only going to make Chantelle look bad and that he's not going to believe a word that comes out of her mouth, because in Gray's mind, it can't be anyone else. She must be lying! But of course all of us know she's being truthful, I feel like shouting at the TV, "JUST BELIEVE HER!" I'm not too sure if Gray is going realise that Chantelle is telling the truth, I think it's going to be a long time until everything is revealed and for Gray to realise he's made a huge mistake. What do you guys think? Could Chantelle perhaps be in more danger of Gray's rage?

Is anyone else getting the feeling that Sonia is feeling lonely? At this moment in time, I'm sure Sonia is living in Dot's house on her own. Bex has left, is Martin still living there? I'm not too sure, I'm assuming he is as we haven't seen him anywhere else other than Ruby's club. But then Tiffany is living with Jack, on her own and Keegan still isn't making an effort to amend things with his wife. Dot is not longer in the house and Whitney is - well, she was staying with Chantelle and Gray, not too sure where she'll be staying now? But I do get the feeling that Sonia is feeling quite lonely without Bex around. She even asked Tiffany to come round for tea, but she had to decline the invitation. But then after a few reassuring words from Denise, Sonia looked a little better? By the way, can I just mention, does anyone else think that Denise has recently become some kind of Agony Aunt? Sonia is the third person I've noticed she's given some kind of life-adjusting advice. Firstly it was Keegan, then Tiffany, now Sonia. I do love Denise and she is a brilliant character, it's kinda nice there's someone on the Square that people can turn to in need of advice. Anyway, back to Sonia - can anyone enlighten me? Who the heck is Terry Cant?! Is this some kind of long-lost family member? Or is it an on character who could be set for a comeback? If anyone knows, please give me an insight!

Ooooh Ian really isn't happy about Peter dating Dotty is he? He is doing everything in his power to make sure she has nothing to do with his family. Did anyone else notice that he used Bobby to get into Peter's head about not seeing Dotty. Giving Peter the guilt trip that Bobby also has feelings for her too and that he is who Bobby needs right now after everything he's been through in the last few months. Bobby was clearly hurt after finding out about his brother and the girl he's been pining for. Peter obviously felt guilty and felt like he had to put his brother first, of course leaving Dotty feeling annoyed, feeling played and irritated by Ian as she knew Peter's decision was down to him! I do kinda think it's going to be really difficult for them both, because I do think they genuinely like each other, but Ian will do anything he can to keep them apart. Did Ian actually plant things into Dotty's bag? We kinda knew she was out with Vinny ready to start dealing drugs, but it's kinda a coincidence that Ian would show up just as Dotty was about to fight her way out of the club, only to find herself getting arrested for assaulting an officer. The look on Ian's face was so smug! Is he just gloating because he knows he caught her at a bad moment and can tell his sons about it, or did he want to see her get her comeuppance? We all know that Dotty keeps threatening Ian that she knows about the secret he's keeping from everyone about Dennis's death, we all know that at some point that dark secret is going to come out, it's just a case of how and when?! After what happened with Dotty tonight, will she want to get her own back on Ian? Will she want revenge? Will she even play with Bobby's emotions and try to get to him, to get to Ian - if that makes sense? If Ian won't allow Peter with Dotty, what's to stop Bobby from making his move? Or even Dotty making a move on Bobby? It's a possibility, but I'm intrigued as to what's going to happen next. What do you guys think? Has Ian had the last laugh or is it just a matter of time before Dotty lets slip his big horrendous secret?

Only one more episode left guys, how are we all feeling? EastEnders is going to be leaving our screens on such a bang! Their are going to be so many cliffhangers we'll be left with and we'll all be eager to see what comes of these brilliant story-lines. But hopefully the time will fly by and EastEnders will be back on our screens as soon as we know it! Enjoy the rest of your evening guys and I'll be back tomorrow following tomorrow's final episode before it leaves our screens. Goodnight folks! xXx

#eastenders #billymitchell #karentaylor #mitchbaker #chantelleatkins #grayatkins #whitneydean #benmitchell #soniafowler #denisefox #ianbeale #bobbybeale #peterbeale #dottycotton

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robby-l-keene · 5 years

Text

A Change of Scenery

I don’t care that Miguel @therunawaystudent ran away again. I’m not going to care. I can’t. Not again. Dr. Ali @dr-ali-mills was disappointed, I could tell. She thinks I’ve just run out on my friend. I can’t tell her what’s really going on. I especially can’t tell her.

Last night made me realize that perhaps I hadn’t buried certain feelings as deeply as I had thought. I can handle the fact that Miguel doesn’t have the same feelings for me that I have for him. He’s not the first person to turn me down. And I’m not one of those creeps who can only take no for an answer if the person disappears from their lives. And I really do like, maybe even love, Jason, but feelings or not, Miguel is my best friend. And I thought I was his.

But he’s protecting Hawk while dropping this whole thing in my lap. Hawk. The guy who left him to make his way home, bleeding and disoriented. The guy who thinks it’s funny to get Miguel drunk and see just what dumbass mess he’ll get himself into. *You’ve gotten him drunk before too* Yes, but I didn’t leave him alone to see what other trouble he could find. I took care of him. Just like I did last night and tried to this morning. Like I always do. Hawk just dumps him in the middle of Encino to save his own ass. What if I hadn’t been staying here?

I finally see it. I will never mean as much to Miguel as he means to me and the pain of that, I can’t handle. I feel like I’m coming apart and I’m dying to grab a vice and lose myself for a few hours. Booze, pills, sex, it’s all the same at this point.

I have to get out of here. I go up to my room and start packing a bag, glad that I could finally drive, and Sam had turned my car over to me a few days before. I put Axel in her carrier and go to the kitchen to pack her food and water bowl.

“Hey, Gladys,” I say. “I’m going to take a few days away to think about what I want to do and all. If you want to keep coming over, you can, or if you want to take a few days’ vacation, take off and rest. I’ve talked to Granpa’s accountant. He says you’ll keep getting paid until the house sells or you find another job.”

“You going to your Dad’s, Honey?” she replied.

I shake my head. “Nah, I need somewhere to think where no one there has a stake in what I do with everything. He agrees that’s a good idea.” Okay, so maybe that isn’t exactly true, but he would agree if he knew about it.

“I understand,” she nods. “Well, be safe and have a good time. I’ll probably take some time off, but I’ll keep things here up too.”

“Thanks,” I smile, grabbing Axel and my bags and heading out to my car. I don’t really know where I’m going yet, but I do know that if I don’t go, I’ll soon be heading to Ami’s, or Trey’s. Either one would be equally disastrous.

Maybe disappearing for a few days isn’t the best idea, but really, who will even care? My Dad won’t look for me for a few days since we got in a fight and my mom never looks for me.

First, I do make one stop. There is one person who will be looking for me.

(Text to Jason): Hey, Babe. I know you’re probably pretty busy, but could you come out and talk to me for a few minutes? I’m outside your dorm.

(From Jason): WTF? Seriously? I’ll be right down.

He looks happy to see me. I hug him, then kiss him hard.

(Jason): I didn’t expect to see you. What’s up?

You know how, when we went out last weekend, you were saying that maybe I should take some time away from the house and everyone and decide what to do?

(Jason): Yeah. You doing it?

*I nod* I think so.

(Jason): Where are you going?

*Shrug* Don’t know yet. Maybe up north. Sit on a beach for a while and think about things. I don’t know when I’ll be back though. I might miss our date this weekend.

(Jason): *nods understandingly* That’s okay, Baby. Take some time. Get your head on straight. You can’t make decisions here where you feel guilty about everything. Let me know where you land and if it gets to be too long, I can always run away for a weekend.

*Smiles* You got it. I love you.

(Jason): I love you too.

*I kiss him again before leaving. *

A few miles out of town, I got a text from Miguel asking me not to be mad at him. I sigh. Mad doesn’t even start to describe how I’m feeling so I jot a quick text back, saying it’s okay but that I’ll be gone for a while and wishing him luck. Not rude, but nothing friendly or warm like our usual texts. I can’t. I can’t keep letting the same snake bite me, hoping that when I grab it this time, it’ll be different, that it won’t strike me. I smile at the analogy. What is it with this family and snakes?

I head north and drive most of the day, stopping only when Axel or I need a pit stop. Lunch is a fast food drive-thru in some tiny town near San Francisco. I didn’t know where I was going or what I was going to do when I got there. All I knew was that I needed plenty of miles between me and the Valley.

It was around 10 p.m. when I got to Del Norte County and decided to stop for the night. I asked the attendant at the first gas station I passed about hotels, he said the nearest one was a Bed and Breakfast resort type place near the beach front. But that they were pretty reasonable for rates and took walk-ins during the off seasons. It was another hour to the next chain place that took dogs.

Well, I was 13 hours from home and dead on my feet. What did I have to lose? I followed his direction and pull up to a large ranch house with a vacancy sign on the wooden sign next to the door.

I grabbed my bags and Axel in her carrier and made my way to the front desk ready to fast talk my way into renting a room, even though I’m just seventeen.

“Just a minute!” A voice called from a back room.

I look around while I wait. The place is pretty ritzy. The gas station attendant said they allow small pets but I’m already second-guessing keeping Axel here. So much expensive stuff here for her to break or chew. Guess she’ll have to stay in her carrier tonight.

“Robby? Robby Keene?” The voice sounds confused.

I turn and find myself looking at probably my Dad’s closest friend in the world now that Mr. LaRusso is out of the picture again.

“Fuck,” I mutter. “Look, I don’t want any trouble. I’ll just be going.” I head for the door, but he somehow beats me to it.

“Like hell, you will,” he snaps. “What are you doing here? Is your Dad @everyonesfavoritegoldenboy with you?”

I just stare at him.

“Okay, I’ll take that as a no,” he replies. “You’ve got to be the unluckiest kid in the world. You try to run away and run right into someone who will tell your parents where you are.”

“Was,” I reply. “Where I was. I’m not staying here.”

“You’re not leaving,” he answers. “It’s after ten and you look exhausted. I’m not letting you go anywhere tonight.”

I just stare at him. Trying to decide if I should call his bluff when he softens.

“Come on, Kid,” he says. “Tell you what, I won’t call your dad tonight, but I can’t in good conscience let you leave here, tired and hungry. Just stay the night and we can talk about what you need to do in the morning. I won’t ask you any questions about why you’re here. I promise.”

How did he know I was hungry? The smell coming from the kitchen is delicious. After a minute, I finally give in. “Fine. But I’m not answering any questions. And I’m not calling my Dad.”

“Deal,” he says, holding his hands up in surrender.

He leads me to a small, private dining area off the main kitchen. “Alex, this is Robby Keene. I’ve told you about him.”

The man at the table looks up and smiles. “Your buddy’s kid. Your namesake, right?” He stands up and shakes my hand warmly.

“Right,” Bobby smiles. “Robby, I like you to meet my husband, Alex.”

“Nice to meet you,” I nod.

“Here, here, have a seat,” Alex says, pulling a chair out. “Let’s get you some food.” He takes my bags, noticing that one is a dog carrier. “You have a dog?”

“Yes,” I say, wondering if that will get me out of this.

“Oh my God, Bobby. He has a dog. Can I get it out? What’s its name? Is it friendly?” He was already unzipping the carrier without waiting for answers.

“Alex loves dogs,” Bobby laughs.

“Her name is Axel and she’s very friendly,” I hear myself saying.

“Come here, Axel baby,” Alex croons. “Oh, you’re freezing. I bet it’s a lot colder here than you’re used to in L.A.” He picks Axel up and tucks her in his vest. “There you go. We’ll get you warm. Bobby, turn the heat up.”

“We’re not suffocating the guests because a dog is cold,” Bobby says. “Get her a blanket.”

“I will,” Alex announces, raising his chin. “Come on, Axel. We’ll get you the best blankets in the house since that mean, old man won’t let you have the heat on.” He glares at Bobby. “Well, get the boy some food.” He goes out of the room, leaving his own plate half-eaten and forgotten.

“Forgive him,” Bobby laughs. “He recently lost his dog after sixteen years and we haven’t found another to adopt yet. He’s been missing him.”

“It’s okay,” I say, wondering if he’s bringing Axel back.

“Let me get you some dinner,” Bobby says, disappearing into the kitchen before I can protest. Now was my chance. I could book it and come back for Axel later, but I don’t. I just sit there and soon both men are back. Bobby with a plate loaded with food and Alex with Axel and several blankets. He makes her a nice bed before sitting back at his place.

“Bobby, Hon,” he announces. “Axel and I have bonded. Her name is Axel, mine is Alex, it was fate. We’ll have to keep her now. You’ll have to figure out how to make that happen. Even if we have to keep the boy too.” He winks at me. “Eat, eat.”

I dig into the delicious smelling food. I should be suspicious. I should be jumping up to go, but I just can’t. Bobby and Alex’s moods are contagious, and I feel myself relaxing for the first time in months, really.

Bobby:

You could have knocked me over with a feather when I saw Robby. He is nearly grown. Last time I saw him, he couldn’t have been more than ten. But I would know those green eyes anywhere. The spitting image of Mrs. Laura’s.

The first thing I noticed, after his eyes, was that scared, anxious look about him. As though he was carrying the world on his shoulders and it had just crashed down around him. I truly was afraid to let him leave. He didn’t look like he’d make it another ten miles without breaking down. I know that scared, deer in headlights look. I should. I’d seen it on Johnny’s face often enough.

I hear myself agreeing to most anything to get him to stay the night.

I kept my promise not to ask him any questions, but I can’t keep the one about Johnny. Not technically anyway. I text him while Robby is helping Alex get dessert. I have to. He must be going out of his mind. Robby catches me setting my phone back down.

“You said you wouldn’t call my Dad.” A defiant look falls over his features and I think for a minute that he’s going to make a dash for it.

“I didn’t. I texted him.” Yeah, I know it’s just semantics. “Robby, I had to let him know you were okay. He was probably out of his mind with worry.”

“Yeah, well, you shouldn’t have bothered,” he answers, taking his seat and lift Axel up in his lap. “He probably doesn’t even know I’m gone. If you hadn’t texted him, he wouldn’t have known for a week or more. Don’t be surprised if he doesn’t answer.”

It takes everything I have to keep my promise about questions after that, but I do.

When he’s done eating, I show him to the guest room in our quarters and I swear he and that dog are asleep before I can even turn the lights off. Poor kid. He looks nervous and broken, even in his sleep.

I’m still waiting on Johnny to text me back when Alex and I go to bed.

@chickskickasstoo @mamabearlarusso

#cobra kai rp #need to escape #really is the healthiest way

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pimbilucha · 6 years

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Trigger Warning.

-this post mentions Statutory s*xual behaviors with a minor (no intercourse) mild mention of self-harm and eating disorder-

I have never talked to anyone about this because even though i conceptually know it was not my fault, i was a child that was tricked by someone double her age, i still felt guilty and ashamed. i still do hence the reason why i am doing this anonymously or at least as anonymously as i can. For a long time i had just given up on talking about this and decided to deal with it on my own, but recently something happened that encouraged me to tell my story, maybe not as a comfort to myself but hopefully to help prevent this happening to anyone else.

At this point, many of you have already heard about what Millie Bobby Brown said about her relationship with Drake, the moment i read this it raised multiple red flags, and as i have seen it did the same for others as well. I also imagine that there are many others that might think “these Tumblr dweebs always making such a bit deal out of everything” “its not that big of a deal” and i also imagine that there are kids around Millie’s age annoyed that people are reacting that way. So, i want to use my personal experience as an example to show you that it t isn’t always exaggeration and SJWs trying to find something to complain about. however, before starting i want to make a disclaimer that although i find DRake’s behavior problematic and gross, to be honest at the end of the day i do not completely know his intentions so i do not want to falsely tarnish his name (you know i don’t want to get sued or whatever) i am just using this recent situation as an example i suppose.

When i was 14 i felt a lot of pressure to fit in, as many of us do. Due to this pressure, i did a lot of stupid things i wish i had not done. one of the things that i was so harsh on myself about was dating, because of the society we live in and the media and such kids are basically told to start dating as fast as possible, if they don’t then there’s probably something wrong with them; i am not trying to vilify dating, i mean if you want to start dating at 13 or 14 sure go ahead i mean i do feel it’s too young to go through all not so pretty parts about dating but as long as you want to and it is someone around your age 13-14 or 15 go ahead but i also want you to know that if you don’t date until much later in life or not at all even that is also okay don’t force yourself to do it, because that's what i have done multiple times and i regret it deeply. The first time, when i was 14 i had never liked anyone i actually didn't have a real crush on a real person (none celebrity or fictional) until i was 19, but during my preteen years my lack of interest in anyone troubled me i felt like i was odd, like there was something wrong with me so every once in a while i forced or tricked myself into having “crushes”. one, in particular, was on a boy who lived in the same apartment complex as one of my “friends” at that time, which coincidentally was located across the street from my apartment complex so you can imagine that i spent a lot of time in her house. The biggest coincidence was that this boy’s stepfather was my new volleyball coach, he worked at our school, a Catholic all-female school. As i had been practicing volleyball since i was in 5th grade (my school goes from pre.K to 11th-grade high school when you graduate) my “plan” was to get close to my coach so i could get close to his son. I can now see how seriously flawed and troublesome this was but alas, i was a child and all my “friends” seem to think it was a perfect idea. i feel like a need to give a little background so to make this a little bit less of a huge mess. for starters these “friends” i keep mentioning were part of a bigger group of friends, we were about 10 or 12 and we had all been friends since 3th grade, most of the time it was my best friend and i and the rest, however in 7th grade our teachers separated us and my BFF and i were in different classrooms and the rest were all divided with us. I was in the same classroom as three of our friends... let's call them “TCA” i remember that during 3 and 4th grade would always fight with those three but we always made up, i haven’t talked to them since btw. T is the one that lives in the apartment complex across from me and in the same place as the coach. My best friend and i drifted apart during that year but her parents still drove me home after volleyball practice every week *that’s relevant to the story later*

The “plan” started off going well, i mean at least i thought it was. I remember thinking if the coach thought i was pretty he would start talking to his son about me, that's what my grandma did every time she saw a good looking boy why would this be any different?? so i started trying to look as pretty as i could during practice ( i can’t help but shake my head at 14-year-old me) on time TCA and me were at T’s apartment and we decided to go look for the boys to ask them if the wanted to hang out with us, when we got to the coach’s house his son wasn’t there, nor was his wife or his daughter (that went to school with us but was younger) yet he still thought it was okay to invite us in, we accepted because i think we thought “oh my God! we get to see the inside of a teachers house!!” but now i know that this should have been a warning sign. To make a long story short, i started spending a lot of time with the coach, i don’t know how or when but apparently what i was perceiving as a friendship? or his help to get close to his son now i know was something else, what i thought was friendly funny banter he probably thought it was flirting? Then at some point even though in a way i knew it was weird i started enjoying the attention i was getting and although i felt guilty when you’re 14 and you already think there’s something wrong with you for not dating or having crushes and then suddenly someone is giving you that attention you felt you needed, its ..intoxicating. he started finding ways to get me alone with him, it was weird i felt a little uncomfortable, i knew things were heading in a completely different way i had imagined, and i didn’t want it to go that way, i was scared and nervous but the attention made me feel special, mature even. Then one day for volleyball practice my best friend couldn’t stay, therefore i didn’t have no one to take me home, there was no one at school. i spent the two hours in that were usually designated for practice in the gym with all the gym teachers until one by one they all started leaving, as i was about to leave the room the coach stood in front of me and kissed me. it was my first kiss, i was 14 and a 40 something married man with kids whom i trusted took it from me. that day while walking home, something i wasn’t supposed to do, it took me 2 or 3 hours to get to my house (you can study far from your area where I’m from) and during the whole walk it was so confused, i felt gross and wrong i kinda wished i was run over by a car, but at the same time i felt special too in such a twisted way i can’t even explain. A few days after that he told me to meet him at night, i thought and hoped it was to tell me that what he had done was wrong, so i made up a lie and left my house, meet him somewhere and to my horror he took me to a motel, i tried to convince myself it was so no one could see us while we talked, i was only half right.

i still remember every moment of that night and it sends shivers down my spine, i feel repulsed and gross i feel like i want to bathe in bleach. i am thankful that i was able to keep my clothes on the whole time, i am also thankful to god there was no intercourse just touching and kissing. It wasn’t mutual, i just remember laying there and wanting to go home, just waiting for it all to stop. i felt shame, i felt gross and evil, i didn’t want it but i never said no, i just let it happen, laying there to scared to move, i did say no to other things though, like getting into the tub or something he kept mentioning he saw in “American pie” i did say no to that, but i never stopped him from touching me, i remember he grabbed my hand in tried to make me feel how “turned on”I had made him, it was scary it was gross i just pulled my hand away and pretended it didn’t happen. i was confused really confused i didn’t want it but part of me was like “well you like the attention, what did you expect you’re not saying no so you must like it” the rest was scared. when it finally finished, he took me back home, he left me a few blocks away and as i walked i felt dirty, like trash undeserving of respect, part of me wanted to die. i got home and pretended as if all was fine, but the more time passed the dirtier and the more disgusted i felt with myself. i hated everything about me, after that night i just avoided him like the plague but i still had to see him in class, i also started hearing rumors. i was terrified, i was ashamed, i felt guilty (i still do) and i just wanted to die. i remember he even got another teacher to get me to talk to him, i just blocked them all and tried as hard as i could to pretend nothing ever happened, or at least on the outside because in the inside i was withering away and so where my grades and everything else about me.

In a desperate attempt for me not to fail a year my parents sent me to the U.S, you might have asked yourself where were my parents until now, they were at home they were there and i know they tried but they were also busy with a 1-year-old and a 9-year-old, they were also trying their best to give us the life we had: private schools, good neighborhood and such all with the income of one parent, in addition to that puberty, is a dangerous time where you build a wall against them for no reason. they tried i know they tried, when i walked home that time they were furious my school let me leave the premises without proper authorization given that i either rode the bus or my friends parents would drive me so i had no reason to walk home, after that my school implemented strict rules for letting students leave school property by foot, but i also know that because of how parenting is where i am from i would have probably just gotten yelled at and grounded (which would have been better tbh). anyway in America, i started cutting, i also started making myself throw up after each meal, i feel like in a way it was just a desperate cry for help, i never really made myself bleed they just looked like scratches but each time my family would find out my parents only yelled at me, and seeing how much it broke my grandparents hearts was enough to make me stop. I never really got the help i needed but i started focusing on myself, getting better on my own, getting good grades and forgetting it. When i want back to my old school in my home country, the coach was not in my school anymore, he had quite but his daughter was there for a few more years so i had to see his ugly evil face a few more times, i also saw him near his house since it was so close to mine, it always brought back terrible memories that made me want to die and burn myself but i was back with my real friends and although they don’t know everything that happened they gave me their love and support.

to this day, i more often than not get random flashbacks of that time, they still fill me with shame, guilt, and pain. although i know i was groomed that doesn’t take the thorn of hatred i still have for myself, that doesn’t help me forget or forgive myself all i really learned how to do is live with it and try as hard as i can to pretend that it never happened. No one yet knows the full extent and my family has no idea because i don’t want me to look at me differently i don’t want them to not see me like the daughter they love, i don’t want people to see me as a (pardon my language) sl*t that didn’t say no. i know at this point that i probably didn’t do what i said i was and this probably doesn’t help to identify predators or gives any help at all. I just want you to know that if you read thus far that please be wary of any older person that shows a little to much interest in you, i know it might make you feel special and that the attention feels nice and it might be something you need but please stay away and tell someone. it can start innocently like a friendship, a help or a guide and it may just stay like that, i hope to god it always stays like that, but sadly we share this world with gross gross people, that like taking advantage and grooming young naive kids. I don’t know how to put it into words, but just stay away from them, ask why are they showing so much interest in someone younger and much vulnerable than them i know it might sound like i am insulting you but i really mean it, why can’t they find friends their age? why are they showing such selfless interest in your love life? why are they asking you to not share seemingly innocent conversations or interactions with other? ask yourself that, ask someone you know and trust that. That’s why what Millie said rang some bells, again i am not trying to tarnish Drake’s name given that this is all just a misunderstanding, but you can’t just tell a 14-year-old “i miss you” and expect it not to sound predatory he may have good intentions, but i don’t know him and from this perspective he sounds like a threat i know all too well now. And even if! he is just trying to be a guide, he should be more mindful of what he says or does and maybe be aware that their interactions shouldn’t be so private, he is the adult he is the one with the power and he is the one that should know. i don’t even know what point I’m trying to make now, but just please be careful.

Age is nothing but a number is only valid to motive you to not let it stop you from following your dreams, not as an excuse to be in an unbalanced relationship. during your first decade of life, every year is so different, i was a completely different person when i was 13 and when i was 14 and there's only a year difference, at 13 i was still interested in some toys and playing with my friends and i said i woullld never drink in my life, at 14 i was like uughhh! so lame to all of that and i got drunk for the first time ever; at 15 i was also much different than at 14, same as 16 and 17 each year it was as if i was a different person, with different tastes, style, thoughts, fears different everything, it wasn’t until 18 when i became more established in who i was and what i wanted, and even though now at 22 i am a little different than then the changes are minor, they’re more of knowledge and stability and anything else. i don’t think i could have a conversation with myself now and me at 14 it would be impossible, so why would someone much older than you want to be in a relationship with you? in a real stable healthy relationship? they don’t, they want to be in control, they want to handle you and use you how they want they want to trick you into doing what they want you to do even if you might feel uncomfortable. sure if you’re 20 and you’re in a relationship with someone a few years older (up to 7 feels okay) that's fine because you’re established as your own person now, you know the world a little better, and both of you are in similar mental places which leads to you being in a balanced equal position, were both of you respect each other. IDK just be careful, i don’t know how to explain what i want to say.

one more thing! boys i know society always shows you it is okay too and that you are a bigger man when you are able to get the older woman or guy, i can name movies and shows that imply that but it’s not okay, this goes for you too!

again! i am not trying to tarnish DRakes name, i am aware i might be translating my personal experience into this situation and making it a misunderstanding. in the off chance, it is this case i apologize but i am not sorry it still serves as an example. please stay away from younger girls. YOU HAVE THE SAME AGE DIFFERENCE WITH MILLIE AS MY PARENTS HAVE WITH ME, A 17 YEAR DIFFERENCE. YOU COULD BE HER FATHER IF YOU WOULD’VE HAD HER YOUNG. so stay away, she has other younger people that can help her with boys. if your intentions are not bad i apologize but stay away.

#trigger warning #tw: pedophila mention #tw: cutting #tw: eating problems #tw: abuse #personal #stay away #story time #millie and drake situation #stranger things #millie bobby brown

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rmuldrake-blog · 7 years

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Twin Peaks Part 14 Coffee Time

Well here we are we are now 4 hours away from twin Peaks finishing “the return” story, the pile driver punches just keep coming.

So the episode kicks off with Cole calling the sheriffs department in Twin Peaks he is returning Frank Truman’s call, Truman is providing Cole information on the missing page of Laura’s diary. There a wonderful little scene between Lucy and Cole. I can only imagine was Lucy and Andy’s trip to Bora Bora would of been like.

We stay with Cole and the team for an explanation of the first Blue Rose case

Olympia, Washington, 1975

2 field agents investigate a murder in Olympia, Washington. (Cole and Jefferies)

They arrest Lois Duffy at a motel. They kick the door in after hearing a gunshot, there are 2 women inside. One on the floor dying the other holding the gun then drops it whe the agents entewr

The wounded women is Lois Duffy on the floor she speaks

“i’m like the blue rose” and then smiles then dies and disappears

The other woman is also Lois Duffy she doesnt have a Twin sister Albert comments.

While awaiting trail Lois Duffy swears she didn’t commit she hangs herself.

Tammy is asked what question should she ask she returns with

“whats the significance of the blue rose”

“blue rose does not occur in nature its not a natural thing, the dying woman was not natural, conjured, whats the word a tulpa”

Tulpa (Tibetan: སྤྲུལ་པ, Wylie: sprul-pa), nirmita (Sanskrit: निर्मित), or thoughtform, is a concept in mysticism of a being or object which is created through spiritual or mental powers. The term comes from Tibetan "emanation" or "manifestation".

“Good” Albert retorts.

This scene plays out very much like X files, so its probably why I liked it so much, The tulpa has also appeared in X file law in season 6′s Arcadia (the one where Mulder and Scully play house) and in season 10′s home again (the band aid man)

Cole enters the room with his thumbs up Coffee time

Diane is on her way but before that we get the window cleaner, Moving on quickly...

Then we get the bombshell, On the last night that Diane saw Cooper did he mention Briggs Cole asks, she doesn’t want to talk a bout that night, but Cole pushes her. She confirms that he did, Albert then spells out what has happened to Briggs and the ring that was found

The next part I was shouting at the screen over and over again in Doctor who fashion.

Diane’s half sister is Janey-E and is married to Douglas Jones everyone calls him Dougie. Shes estranged but last heard they were in Las Vegas.

So my initial thought straight away hit me, Cole Albert and Tammy have now asked about Vegas, Diane got that text basically asking as much, We don’t know which side of the fence she is sitting on but she did seem genuinely shocked when they asked about Janey-E could it be that things are starting to make sense to her now the pieces are falling in line?

Cole calls the Vegas office there are 23 Douglas Jones in the area, (why did they not mention Janey-E is anyones guess surely that would of narrowed the search a bit.)

“How are we going to find the right one”

“WILSON HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU THIS IS WHAT WE DO IN THE FBI”

Brilliantly funny my x file fandom also struck a chord albeit in a slightly different way.

““Thats why they put the I in the fbi” Xfiles pilot.

So were no more than 15 minutes in wow, so much stuff to mull over already,

After Diane leaves we get Cole bringing everyone up to date with the missing pages of Laura’s dairy, with the revelation of 2 coopers but after Cole’s first case I can see now why this may be more low key than I imagined it to be, A footnote in another Blue rose case. There are 2 coopers we now know what we are dealing with, but suspicions were probably already there this acts more of a confirmation to them,

Monica Bellucci dream, “Oh boy” Albert sighs and Tammy... well her look say’s it all.

So the dream:

Paris Cafe, the music is deliberately tense and suspenseful. Cooper was there but no face could be seen only his chin,

Monica was pleasant and had brought friends. While having a Coffee Monica quotes the phrase

“We are like the dreamer who dreams and then lives inside the dream, .... but who is the dreamer”

Monica looked beyond Cole while he was feeling VERY uneasy. As he looks back we see scenes from Fire walk with me.

Cooper says it 10:10 February 16th. Cooper was worried about the day because of his dream, Jefferies appears and points at Cooper asking

“who do you think that is there”

Cole and Albert both hadn’t remembered that. Its seems to be a running theme I am picking up on at the moment. more on that later.

I don’t want to theorise too much but dreams are a kin to the lodges, are we seeing a guiding force to the final act or a we seeing some very timey wimey stuff going on.

So back in Twin peaks the boys are getting ready to go into the woods, sandwiches are laid on the table and Andy is having just cheese, Reinforcing the fact that he is a simple standard guy very plain non corrupted. well thats the way I see it especially with what happens shortly,

They arrest Chad and I can pretty much imagine the whole fandom punching the air, screaming yes. I did. I can only assume that because they all were leaving for the mountain that they wanted him out the way now.

Up in the mountain I had a very uneasy feeling, we had the hum but we also had Andy at the back and a bit behind them in a couple of scenes while they are walking, it gave us milliseconds extra screen time but it did feel like something was about to happen.

The listening post is gone Bobby remembers lots of machines and then we arrive Bobby laughing on seeing Jack rabbits palace. One thing to note here

The pan up the trunk is VERY reminiscent of the purple place before we see the Giant/Fireman and the birth of the golden Laura Orb.

253 yard due east with soil in their pockets we find Naido, Andy comforts her a vortex appears and he ends up sitting across from what we now know is the fireman. Andy is basically shown the entire history of the twin peaks story the explosion, Convenience store, GOTTA LIGHT, Laura’s death, Coopers ganger and even some future events (Lucy being shown something by Andy it would be funny if this was only a self fulfilling prophecy and there is nothing to the scene whatsoever ) Also included is the post where the kid got killed and the number 6 I have a feeling this post has been in the show before i’m guessing fire walk with me but not sure.

I feel that Andy must of been picked as he like cooper is not corruptible he is pure, plain like the sandwich no additions just who he is.

We return to planet earth, Andy is as confident as we have EVER seen him, he now has a purpose and he will do everything he can to complete his destiny. Naido must be protected and no one must know where she is.

Truman and Hawk are struggling to remember what happened, its a running theme throughout then whole show with Cooper, Cole, Diane, People in the bar, anyone who may of been close too or in contact with the otherworldly beings or supernatural vortex's etc,

We get an Andy and Lucy scene in the cells, a dog got lost and Lucy must have stayed the night Andy remembers that night too, Please don’t tell me Wally was conceived there Ha Ha.

Chad gets a lecture from Andy and we get a really bizarre guy mimicking everything, With blood or some other substance coming from his mouth, its a genuine WTF moment. I need to know more.

We find ourselves at the Great northern with Freddie cracking nuts with his distinctive green glove and finding out its James birthday.

It appears James is after another married woman (sighs), Renee, could that be the girl who was at the bar when he was singing. Also I have had the thought that is this scene prior to our first bar scene, James doesn’t know who is on. Surely you would know if Lissie was on? No?

We then get the green glove Iron fist story, Where did he start bleeding? it must of been terrifying to the doctor We also hear a lot of what the fireman had said, he has never spoken so much (off screen obviously), Freddie says London Town, when was it last called London Town the Victorian ages?? The fireman tells him that he will possess:

“the power of an enormous pile driver” we get the Jobsworth story and the cockney slang (i’m not a fan) of snapping his Gregory, (Gregory Peck=Neck), There is also a red card metaphor just in case you didn’t realise he is English, The fireman tells him to go to Twin Peaks to for fill his destiny.

James heads down to the furness’s we get the same noise down hear from up above in Ben's offices and a door, The whole scene seems to call back to Bob we see him in an area very much like this one i think in Fire walk with me if memory serves me right.

SOOOOO we come to Sarah Palmer, I can only guess it leads on from her boxing scene, no more drink needs one goes to bar.

An obnoxious guy tries to hit on her, which turns out to be a HUGGE mistake, once Sarah takes off her face we get spikes clawing out of her face a hand which has a blackened spirit finger (as discussed on the plane by Cole to Tammy) and then a smile worthy of the cat from Alice in Wonderland, once the face is back on we get a devastating chomp on his neck. Is Sarah aware is she possessed or is she in complete control, does she have that creature in her from episode 8, is it as i have been educated recently Babylon from the box has it taken her over, Is it even Sarah soo many questions its left deliberately ambiguous. Her final remarks, “sure is a mystery huh” is just chilling.

So we are back at the bar another 2 random people talking about getting high, (Twin peaks seems to have a really big drug problem), Then we come to Billy, This girl is supposedly the last one to see him, she goes on to tell the story in the kitchen she thinks her uncle was there she is not sure, Billy jumped over a 6ft fence got into the kitchen blood coming from nose and mouth, he’s looking really strange, they don’t tell anyone? (did they remember it at the time my guess is it just left there mind as these things keep happening.) and we also find out that he has been having a relatioship with her mom TINA, The moment we get her name ominous music comes over. The girl looks down and then asks “and then he just ran out again” its almost as if the previous question didn’t happen like she forgot, its all links in thematically. She also now doesn’t know if her uncle was there, where as before she thought he was.

There are Probing questions here “have you seen Billy”

“ive heard you were the last person to see Billy”

“Whats your moms name”

All these questions feel deliberate the others are lighter in tone.

To me this probably was the most intriguing part of the whole episode. what an episiode it was.

Who is Billy? Is he having multiple affairs, Audrey, Tina etc, Who’s the dreamer, Is it Cooper, Is it Audrey in a COMA, Whats that thing in the CELL near Naido and Chad? Who’s after Naido is it the experiment? Whats happening with Sarah? Is she polar opposite to Laura now? Is the fireman creating a force to protect the white lodge? There is a plan in place it seems.

We have a lot to get through in 4 hours, and its going to be glorious.

#twinpeaks audreyhorne jameshurley billy part14 cole cooper

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38-planes · 7 years

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The Wild Child Of “Come From Away”

Logo: New Now Next [April 3, 2017]

Jenn Colella, one of Broadway’s few out leading ladies, talks playing a real-life hero, making out with Idina Menzel, and lesbians in open relationships.

On September 11, 2001, after terrorists flew jets into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, authorities closed United States airspace to all air traffic. In the remote Canadian town of Gander, Newfoundland, 38 passenger jets suddenly landed on the airstrip, and were grounded until further notice.

Instead of treating them as intruders, the town opened its homes and hearts to 7,000 strangers from all over the world. By the time the visitors departed, cultures had come together and lifelong friendships had formed.

The hit musical Come From Away tells this sprawling story with a foot-stomping Celtic band and a dozen versatile actors portraying some 50 real-life characters, many of whom flew in from Newfoundland to dance onstage with the actors on opening night.

The show packs a political punch at this ungenerous moment in America—a point that hung in the air when Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau invited Donald Trump to attend a recent performance. (The President declined but sent Ivanka.) Critics took the musical’s subtext to heart. The Washington Post called it “an exuberant antidote for what ails the American soul.”

For extra exuberance, there’s star Jenn Colella, one of Broadway’s few out lesbian leading ladies. In Come From Away, Colella sings her heart out as real-life pilot Beverley Bass, one of the pilots who landed at Gander on 9/11. But Colella, 43, been attracting fangirls ever since she rode a mechanical bull in Urban Cowboy, rocked the butch title role in The Beebo Brinker Chronicles, and played one-half of a lesbian couple in If/Then.

On the phone in her dressing room before a recent performance, with her girlfriend chiming in, Colella told us about her life as an irresistible wild child, from her current relationship à trois to the occasional makeout session with Idina Menzel.

How would you describe the story of Come From Away?

Jen Colella: For me, it’s about welcoming people because they need help. I don’t know where we got away from the habit of being kind, but kindness and compassion is where we live. We all have access to it, and it requires practice.

How was it for the cast when Justin Trudeau and Ivanka Trump came to the show? How was it for you?

It was extraordinary to have them here, and have them together. People are drawn to this show who know that everyone is good at heart, people who are drawn to a sort of kindness movement that’s in the air right now. Justin knows that’s the best possible way to lead people, and I believe Ivanka does as well, or else she wouldn’t have joined.

Did you speak with Ivanka?

We didn’t. It was Justin’s night. He made a speech before, and I believe Ivanka ducked out a little early out of respect, so as not to take anything away from him. But the show is direct address–we can see the audience very clearly. She was truly enjoying herself and smiling and laughing and crying and was really in it, so I know she had a good time.

You play Captain Beverley Bass, who blazed her own trails as the first female captain for American Airlines. She seems like the most clearly defined hero in Come From Away. How did you two meet?

After our final preview [at La Jolla Playhouse], Beverley and her husband Tom arrived at a restaurant across the street. We spotted one another from across the room. She came over and said, “I think you’re playing me,” and I said, “I think you’re right!” I’m so grateful that they’ve chosen me to play this badass pioneer for women. I feel the privilege and responsibility of it.

Like all the actors, you play several characters in Come From Away. Aside from Captain Beverley, you play this enchantingly gay-looking woman in a T-shirt and vest. Was my gaydar going off correctly with that character, or is she just Canadian?

She’s just Canadian! Actually that character, Annette, is quite male-crazy. She likes the men that come off these planes. But I have faith that Annette would be open to women as well. I’m going to throw that into the show tonight and see how it plays.

I was googling you, and the first thing I saw was this hashtag: #jennfuckingcolella. Do you have lesbian fangirls?

I do, and it feels so good! Everybody’s respectful, but, yes, to receive that kind of energy from women fuels me. It feels, again, like a privilege and a responsibility. And I’m so thrilled that I’m out and the age that I am, and I feel confident and capable to be a good role model for gay women.

How do women reach out to you?

Some fans will see shows many, many times. I have one awesome fan—I don’t know if these people are even gay, to tell you the truth—but one girl has my signature tattooed over her heart.

I’d say that’s a clue.

She hasn’t come out to me, you know? So I don’t want to assume. But I get a lot of baked goods, sweet cards, flowers. Chicks are so good at gifts, right? I ride a scooter around town, because I’m like a 12-year-old, and one of my fans actually presented me with a new scooter. Yeah, they mean it. It’s awesome.

Let’s go back to the tattoo: Did you autograph her chest and then she went and got the autograph tattooed?

She’d seen If/Then many, many times. She said, “Hey, will you sign this piece of paper for me?” I did, and then later she came back and showed me her tattoo. Isn’t that awesome?

You sometimes subbed in for Idina Menzel as the lead in If/Then. What was that like?

Idina is an amazing person, and super sweet and fun. She and I like to flirt a lot. We made out a couple of times, which was super, super hot and fun. I like to tell as many people that as possible. Great kisser.

How exactly did that come to pass?

The best part is, my girlfriend is in the dressing room with me right now, and she keeps looking up and giving me these like sexy little smiles. Anyway, Idina’s straight—mostly—in the way that I’m mostly gay. And I would just wear her down at parties, just walk by and say, “We should make out.” Just trying to constantly put little seeds into her beautiful brain. She took me up on it once or twice.

Aside from making out, did you and Idina ever sing together?

Onstage, we had many opportunities to sing together, and that voice is just inimitable.

As is yours. In fact, speaking of Idina’s great roles, did you ever do Elphaba the witch, in Wicked?

People are always asking me that! I finally had to tell them to stop asking me to come in, because I am terrified that I would lose my mind and my voice. I’m going to leave that to those professional belters and try to save this loud-ass belt that I’ve got for as long as possible.

Although it would be really cool to do a gay Elphaba.

I hear you. I hadn’t thought about that. You know what, though, I want to play Bobby in Company. [A 2016 London production reversed genders to feature a woman in the famous leading role of a commitment-phobic bachelor and the loves of his New York circle of friends.]

Your girlfriend’s listening in, so she’ll appreciate this. What kind of woman is attractive to you? Do you have a type?

I like people who are balanced in their masculine and feminine energies. I like girly girls who aren’t afraid to wear ripped jeans and play in the mud. I joked when my girlfriend got here, “You dressed like a little dyke for me today!” She’s wearing ripped jeans and her big belt and a cut Women’s March t-shirt. Yeah! Then as I’m getting older, I realize that what I find sexy is someone who’s smart and kind and funny. I’m attracted to the whole world, is the truth.

Any quality in a woman that’s a deal breaker for you?

Yeah. An unawareness, right? If someone treats a server unkindly—snaps at a server, or anyone in the service industry—that is such a deal breaker for me. I can’t.

Does your girlfriend like seeing you in uniform as Captain Beverley onstage?

[She repeats the question to her girlfriend.] She likes seeing me in everything.

I was going to ask you about starring in The Beebo Brinker Chronicles [the 2008 Off-Broadway adaptation of Ann Bannon’s iconic novels of lesbians before Stonewall]. Has anyone ever talked about filming it?

Lily Tomlin was one of our producers on that play, and she and Jane Wagner talked about possibly filming it during that time, but I haven’t heard any more about it. So, yeah, we can put that back out in the universe as well.

Definitely. Those lesbian pulp paperback days were very sexy.

True. That was one of the sexiest shows I’ve ever worked on. It was fun to be the butch lesbian that all the girls were swooning over.

Not that different from your real life, is it?

[Laughing] It was fun to have that as my job.

I know I’m asking in front of your girlfriend, but do you see yourself in the future marrying and quote unquote settling down? Are you interested in kids?

I’ve been married a couple of times.

To women?

Yeah. My joke is, chicks love it when you propose. I had two wonderful marriages, and I’m a big fan of the institution of marriage if it is truly an equal partnership. But my girlfriend and I are in an open relationship, and that feels really lovely and right for me right now.

So you’re both seeing other people?

She’s actually married to a man. I’m kind of dating them both. They have a little kid whom I adore. And I’m also dating someone else, and, you know, my girlfriend just got on OKCupid, and it’s all very open. There’s a lot of respect and a lot of communication and a lot of trust. It’s quite lovely.

Usually lesbians can’t do that, at least the lesbians I know. Gay men can stay together 50 years, and they manage to keep their exterior lives very hot and vital and yet preserve these lasting relationships. What’s different about you that you can do that?

What I’ve found is that if women are intimate with one another, there’s such an emotional connection that happens. That’s what can be scary for the primary partner: If you have an emotional connection with someone else, how is there going to be any room left for me? But our hearts are much more open and capacious than we give them credit for. There’s no better or best in my world of love. I have boundless love. So the more I can trust myself and love myself, and trust and love my partners, then I’m finding there’s an infinite amount to explore.

Come From Away is now on Broadway at the Schoenfeld Theatre

#come from away #jenn colella #logo tv #new now next #article #interview

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keywestlou · 3 years

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DAY 18.....GREECE THE FIRST TIME

DAY 18…..Greece the First Time

Posted on June 14, 2012 by Key West Lou

Mykonos. Nothing to compare it to. Perhaps a bit like the Jersey Shore, Coney Island or Jones Beach of old. Trying to be the Hamptons, but not quite making it.

Hordes of people! More than I can describe. All on holiday. Tourism is the major industry. The only industry.

Besides the original natives, way back in history there was an influx of Egyptians and Phoenicians. There are many wind mills. Known world wide as Mykonos’ landmark.

The name of the island is Mykonos. The name of the principal town is named Mykonos, also. Unusual.

Chora is the place to be in Mykonos. It is a special area of the town. A neighborhood unto itself. Stone buildings built close together. Narrow streets between them. Very narrow. Like 3-5 feet. The buildings were built close together many years ago to protect them from the sea and its storms. Today those alleys/walkways are the playground of Mykonos. Stores, bars, restaurants and I do not know what permeate the area.

These alleys of Chora go every which way. Like a maze. Easy to get lost.

Little Venice hangs on the ocean side of the Chora. It is called such because its houses literally hang over the sea. At least the balconies do.

I find three differences between Mykonos and Santorini.

One unquestionably is the weather. The humidity on Mykonos is a killer. The evening brings no relief. Breeze. What breeze? There is little, if any. Whereas Santorini had no humidity, was hot by day and cool by night. A sweater or jacket was required in the evening. Air conditioning not used. Open a window or door and sleep comfortably under a blanket.

It is said the difference in humidity, etc. between the two islands is the height of each. Santorini is high and buildings are on top of the cliffs. Mykonos is relatively low. Hills. Gradual, however.

Only about 100 miles separates Mykonos and Santorini. Mykonos is to the north of Santorini and normally would be cooler. Though it is not.

A second difference is the number of people visiting each island. Mykonos is jam packed. An avalange of people arrive daily. Every nationality visits and works on Mykonos. I would describe the crowd last night in the Chora area as being just slightly less appearance wise as Times Square on New Year’s Eve.

Santorini has significantly fewer visitors. Comparatively speaking, I would estimate Mykonos has more visitors than Santorini by 30-1.

The final difference is in the atmosphere. It is in the air. Everyone whoops it up on Mykonos. Party time till the wee hours of the morning. Santorini is in bed by 10. The streets are totally empty by 11.

Life begins between 10 and 11 in Mykonos. Last night as I was walking to my hotel away from the Chora, tons of younger people were walking in the opposite direction. Towards the Chora. The ladies dressed. Dressed! Like in minis, knee length and other size dresses. Heels. Tall. Made up for a night on the town.

I felt sorry for the ladies. The humidity was so heavy I could see their make up starting to run.

By the way, I was walking up to my hotel at 10 while the younger ones were going downhill into the Chora to begin their evening. A difference between the generations.

I had dinner last night in the Chora. Overlooking the sea. The restaurant was Antonia’s. Just like in Key West. Key West’s Antonia’s puts out a better product, though I did enjoy my meal. A lamb casserole.

After dinner, I was off to find the Montparnasse. It is a piano bar. The only piano bar in Mykonos.

Donna and Terri suggested I stop there. Terri sang there at one time. They told me the owners were a Judy and Nikko. Terri said tell them of our relationship and be prepared to be treated royally.

I never did. I could not find the place. It is in one of those alleys I described earlier. I asked three knowledgeable Mykonos citizens where it was. Each knew. Each sent me to a different place. Each was wrong. By this time, the humidity had gotten to me and I said screw it.

Bobby Peaco, who played and sang at the Keys Piano Bar, is playing at Montparnasse now. I was looking forward to seeing him again. I was also looking forward to boozing it up a bit. Did not occur because this man could take the heat no more.

Perhaps tonight.

The stones constituting the walkway in the Chora alleys interested me. I was told they have been there forever. They reminded me of the stones making up the Apian Way. Thirty years ago when in Rome, I visited the Apian Way. The roads were constructed of larger stones than in Mykonos. The same stones which the Roman chariots traveled over. Back before the birth of Christ. The Mykonos and Appian Way stones were similar, except in size.

Mykonos is definitely a tourist town. The prices 25-50 per cent higher than Santinori. Gin on the rocks was 50 per cent higher. For Gordon’s! I did not find this gouging on Santorini.

Today the Super Paradise Beach. I have been assured by many it is one of the world’s finest beaches. I am looking for to experiencing it.

The bottom line is Mykonos is a terrific vacation place. For many from all over the world. It is not my cup of tea, however.

The Greek election is Sunday. Very significant! The result will have world wide impact.

I compare this election to Governor Walker’s recent recall election in Wisconsin. I thought surely he would have been beaten. He was not. Walker has now set the trend to be followed for the next ten years at least in the United States.

In Greece, the issue is the euro or back to the drachma. From what I have experienced in Athens and Santorini, the populace wants back to the drachma. Except for my friend and recent landlord Nikos. He wants to stay with the euro. Nikos represents the affluent. The others I spoke with the more common people. A Wall Street / Main Street battle all over again.

No one is talking politics on Mykonos. The locals are too busy making money. The tourists too busy having a good time.

Sunday will tell the story.

Joanna is my savior! Her grandfather built the hotel I am staying in some fifty years ago. Her uncle now owns it. She manages the place.

Joanna is some place in her twenties. Industrious. Charming. Ever so helpful. You have to understand my cell phone is down, wi-fi does not work that often here, and Louis needs a computer to do his blog.

I explained my problem to Joanna when I checked in. She said no problem. You will use mine as long as you are here. So here I am, sitting at her desk, punching away.

An international hotel chain should look at Joanna. Her experience is in the blood. She would make a great acquisition.

Enjoy your day!

The impeachment trial is winding down today. The guilty/not guilty vote will be taken.

Trump will be exonerated as in the first impeachment trial. He is teflon. Nothing sticks to him.

I listened to this morning’s closing arguments. One observation. Trump’s lead counsel (whose name I cannot recall at the moment) from Philadelphia is a slime. One lawyer to another.

He was a disaster the first day. Came back yesterday. Disgraced himself today.

The Republican Senators were laughing at times during his delivery. Not because of the quality of his presentation. Rather, because of the manner of his attack on the Democratic Managers.

In a real court room, he would not have gotten away with it. The judge would have cut his testicles off immediately.

Don’t let me hear I am a Democrat and a poor loser. Not the issue. The attorney was an embarrassment to his profession. Garbage is garbage.

The funny thing is the attorney did not have to conduct himself in the fashion he did. It has been obvious from day one that Trump could not be convicted. The votes were not there.

Great golf this weekend. The Pebble Beach Golf Tournament.

Pebble Beach consists of three courses. One is closed down for repairs. The other is Spyglass.

I have played Spyglass, also. A tough round. Not as difficult as Pebble Beach itself. However bad enough.

Spyglass is like playing golf in the woods. Narrow fairways. Woods all around. Tall thin trees with branches almost to the ground. A mishit and a player is in the woods in bad shape.

I am impressed with Jordan Spieth’s play. He did well in last week’s tournament. He was leading a the end of the third round. Didn’t have it on the final 18.

He was leading yesterday at the end of the second round with a -12.

I hope he can continue the excellent play. He has had a couple of bad years.

Islamorada is in the mid keys. A 1 hour 45 minute drive from Key West. Old. Fun places, however.

The motels are generally old. Vintage 1950s. Clean. Located right on the ocean beach.

It is the bars and restaurants that make Islamorada a place I enjoy. For lunch, Loreli. On the gulf side. Great sandwiches and people. Pleasant atmosphere.

Dinner in the evening The Islamorada Fish Company. I sometimes go two evenings in a row. On the gulf side also. Stone crabs the specialty of the house. Enjoyed with a great vista view from a huge round deck sitting out over the gulf.

Islamorada is also known as the Fishing Capital of the World. Real fishermen go there to enjoy the sport.

Islamorada is a typical Key. U.S. 1 running down the middle of the Key.

Traffic over the years has obviously gotten heavy. People seeking many of the keys south of Islamorada. Crossing U.S. 1 from one side to the other can be dangerous. Patience required. If you have any smarts, you wait till crossing is easy. Many deaths and bad injuries the result of those who do not. Accidents are many.

The State decided an overhead bridge was required for pedestrian travel in order to avoid accidents from occurring. The Islamorada Council did not want it. The State announced it was cancelling construction.

Everything will remain as it was.

Baseball great Ted Williams was an avid fishermen. In the early 1960s, he purchased a magnificent home on the ocean side. The fishing boats are on the gulf side. Most everything is on the gulf side.

Williams sold his home in 1988. He said at the time that he decided to sell it when he had to wait to cross U.S. 1.

Traffic has always been problem. Worse today, of course. However with a bit of patience, not a problem.

May Johnson’s diary entry was not in the Citizen this morning. Has final publication arrived? Seems so. Hopefully her further diaries will get “translated” and we all will have the plea sue of following her again.

Enjoy your day!

DAY 18…..GREECE THE FIRST TIME was originally published on Key West Lou

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deborahaphillips54303 · 4 years

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The 'Bon Appétit' Test Kitchen and the Myth of the Happy Workplace

The Bon Appétit Test Kitchen and its so-called "cinematic universe" has been described as follows: a "bright spot" in a "sea of garbage," the "internet's favorite cooking show," a form of "Sunday therapy," "an unstoppable force," "meme gods," and even "a Green New Deal fantasy," whatever that means.

Every night, "I check in with the chefs at Bon Appétit like I’m catching up with old friends," Louis Peitzman wrote for Buzzfeed in 2018. Another piece from earlier this year claimed the secret to Bon Appétit's YouTube success was that "everyone is just so damn likable." And having been graced with the crew's presence at the company's "Best Weekend Ever" late last year, writer and Who? Weekly host Bobby Finger recalled, "I felt not just starstruck but crazy. I mean actually deranged!"

Those are just the fawning articles. The Test Kitchen also has fan-run meme pages, an official merch store, two subreddits, and two more devoted specifically to personality Brad Leone and Gourmet Makes star Claire Saffitz. Saffitz, the kitchen's most beloved host, has been described as "the internet's collective crush," about whom people say things like "I would die for Claire" and imitate for Halloween or TikTok fame.

Man Repeller reported late last year that the channel was the fastest-growing in YouTube's food space, with more than 40 million views per month and over 5 billion total minutes watched. It currently has 6 million subscribers. As its hordes of doting fans propped the Bon Appétit Test Kitchen on the highest pedestal, the magazine's staff turned into micro-celebrities, their interpersonal dynamics became objects of obsession, and overall, the workplace was seen as a wholesome culinary ideal. What the Test Kitchen's cult of celebrity obfuscated, however, is that the Test Kitchen is just that: a workplace, like that of any other large—and therefore likely imperfect, if not problematic—institution. So honestly, what did any of us expect?

twitter

As the world found out in industry-shaking fashion this week, the reality of the Test Kitchen isn't the bastion of good that its stans have willed it to be. Last weekend, writer Illyanna Maisonet posted an exchange with Editor-in-Chief Adam Rapoport in which he effectively told her that Puerto Rican food wasn't trendy enough for the magazine to cover, and it read as another example of the brand's diversity problem. On Monday, after writer Tammie Teclemariam posted an old photo of Rapoport and his wife Simone Shubuck dressed in costumes centered on Puerto Rican stereotypes (in the photo, which Shubuck captioned "#TBT me and my papi #boricua," Rapoport wears a silver chain and durag), staffers blew open the door on the company's toxic culture, which has been emotionally and financially unsupportive of people of color. Rapoport—who, amid claims of brownface, maintains that he did not color his skin for the image—resigned the same day.

As assistant food editor Sohla El-Waylly wrote on Instagram on Monday, not only was she hired for her role at the rate of $50,000 per year despite her 15 years of experience (and the high cost of living in New York, where the company is located), but she was "pushed in front of video as a display of diversity" and not even paid for those appearances. Per Buzzfeed, El-Waylly and other hosts of color weren't paid for their video work, which is arranged through contracts with Condé Nast Entertainment, while white video stars were compensated. As the floodgates burst open, Twitter users soon dug up drinks editor Alex Delany's old internet history, which included a 2013 Vine of him saying the F-slur, a Confederate flag cake he'd posted to Tumblr, and a series of sexist tweets.

A damning report from Business Insider on Wednesday showed how far the brand's problems extended. From conversations with 14 former and current staffers, writer Rachel Premack concluded that BA was a "locus for exclusion and toxicity." Ryan Walker-Hartshorn, Rapoport's assistant for close to three years and the only Black woman on staff, was repeatedly denied raises from her $35,300 base salary and treated by Rapoport like "the help," in her words. "There is a big difference in terms of how they monetarily value the white employees versus the people of color," El-Waylly told BI.

On YouTube, BA's channel landed at exactly the right time. Compared to other food channels, which increasingly felt over-produced, the Test Kitchen videos were less polished; they had more personality; and they made the filming and editing processes clear. BA's videos resonated philosophically as well. Saffitz's Gourmet Makes, in which she attempts to recreate popular processed foods, is visibly an arduous and frustrating multi-day process, and at Mashable, Morgan Sung described Saffitz's series as an example of "probably the healthiest, most productive way to approach issues," while Quartz called her the "ultimate life coach."

Though the Test Kitchen's transformation into a celebrity force has been good for business, it's also set things up for exactly the reckoning that's happening now.

As with the recent situation involving Alison Roman (who got her start at BA), Chrissy Teigen, and Marie Kondo, the Test Kitchen's growing popularity and prestige outside the insular food world has complicated our ability to talk about its issues with clarity. Just as the bigger conversation about Roman and who tends to profit from cooking global food (the answer: white cooks) was largely portrayed as just a celebrity "Twitter feud," the changes at BA have been framed as the oversimplified result of a "brown face photo sparking anger" or the resurfacing of a "racially insensitive photo." The celebrity culture of the Test Kitchen begets the treatment celebrities get at gossip rags: reductive, lacking in nuance, and sounding the alarm for critics of "cancel culture." It's more than that, though.

The Test Kitchen's gargantuan online presence overrode its offline truth, as it projected and leaned into what people wanted to see, which was an Office-esque sitcom in which a friendly band of coworkers snickers behind the bumbling boss's back. As writer James Factora suggested in a tweet preceding all of this, perhaps the Test Kitchen's popularity is related to the widespread obsession with The Office. While Factora's tweet reads tongue-in-cheek, it's not wrong, and the love for the show perpetuated the illusion that a toxic workplace can be laughed at and lived with.

The Office has funny moments, but in a way, it led society astray. It suggested that a bad boss who makes clumsy, insensitive comments and makes life hard for employees can be a point of humor, instead of a toxic presence that could be booted. Who does that benefit except bosses? As BA turned the Test Kitchen into essentially its own sitcom, with each cooking star becoming an Office-esque talking head, it furthered the false notion of the perfect workplace, and people online were quick to gobble it up. The interactions between co-workers, even when off-putting, became meme fodder and pushed stans to throw their support behind their chosen star.

The idea that everything gets bad once it gets big sounds like a line ripped from Portlandia, but it is a maxim that applies to everything from emo bands to hashtags to dog breeds to cooking hosts. The higher the platform we give something, the more it can fall, and the discourse around the Test Kitchen seemed unprecedented in its fawning, at least within the food sphere. (Though we might have learned from situations like the downfall of Mario Batali.)

When we laud any product or person to this extent and make it an object of cultural obsession, it becomes easier to ignore the flaws and the parts of the conversation that don't fit what we want to see. This is true for the Test Kitchen, which could never really have met the inflated expectations of goodness that stan culture built up around it; people saw the perfect workplace because they wanted a perfect workplace. The problems at BA are institutional, but stan culture allowed people to compartmentalize the Test Kitchen as something separate and authentic.

In response to all of this, BA's parent company Condé Nast—a 111-year-old company with 6,000 employees globally at the start of this year—has announced that it will be "accelerating" its first ever diversity and inclusion report. On Tuesday, Amanda Shapiro, the editor of BA's Healthyish spinoff, became the brand's acting deputy director, and on Wednesday, the editors of BA said in a statement, "We want to be transparent, accountable, and active as we begin to dismantle racism at our brands."

Still, former staffers have identified Shapiro and other remaining BA employees as complicit in "toxic" behaviors. Despite calls for Matt Duckor, Condé Nast's head of programming for lifestyle and style, to step down over the unfair pay system and his mocking tweets about the gay community, he remains employed, as does Alex Delany. Both of them have issued social media apologies. With this new context, though, the joking tweets and fawning memes about the Test Kitchen don't hold up as well.

No surprise, Test Kitchen stans have responded to this all with even more memes and lionizing statements: "Update: we went to war for Sohla from the Bon Appétit test kitchen," reads one popular tweet. The height of the pedestal hasn't changed, though who's on the pedestal has. But as Bon Appétit changes, will its fan culture change also? To grapple with all of this new knowledge, it should.

Follow Bettina Makalintal on Twitter.

via VICE US - undefined US VICE US - undefined US via Mom's Kitchen Recipe Network Mom's Kitchen Recipe Network

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cyberpoetryballoon · 4 years

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The 'Bon Appétit' Test Kitchen and the Myth of the Happy Workplace

twitter

Though the Test Kitchen's transformation into a celebrity force has been good for business, it's also set things up for exactly the reckoning that's happening now.

Follow Bettina Makalintal on Twitter.

via VICE US - undefined US VICE US - undefined US via Mom's Kitchen Recipe Network Mom's Kitchen Recipe Network

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carolrhackett85282 · 4 years

Text

The 'Bon Appétit' Test Kitchen and the Myth of the Happy Workplace

twitter

Though the Test Kitchen's transformation into a celebrity force has been good for business, it's also set things up for exactly the reckoning that's happening now.

Follow Bettina Makalintal on Twitter.

via VICE US - undefined US VICE US - undefined US via Mom's Kitchen Recipe Network Mom's Kitchen Recipe Network

0 notes