#my favourite thing about my shitty shitty contract

[nilly002]

Probably nobody that wants to hear this but I am so fucking pissed about reddit killing itself.

Reddit was my favourite place on the entire web. Unlike all the other social media it wasn't about putting individual users on a stage and everyone following them it was simply a shared stage with the users collectively deciding what get's to be in the spotlight.

Yes it was a shithole but it was our shithole. We decided what we got. The algorithm on reddit was utter dogshit and everyone just disabled it, the real algorithm was the hive mind filtering the best content to the top. All the while actual conversation and debate was actually possible because the comments were not arbitrarily limited in length or ordered by what can only be described as little Timmy's first attempt at a Bogosort algorithm.

We had a fucking contract: users bring the content and watch ads, moderators keep the site usable and the amount of effort reddit has to put in to not get sued down to a minimum, all reddit had to do was provide the servers, ban a subreddit once in a blue moon and be content with having a decently profitable site with the factually most worthless users of big social media

But NOOOOO "We NeEd To InCrEaSe PrOfItS! ThOsE pEsKy ThIrD pArTy ApPs ArE sTeAlInG oUr MoNeY" No you idiot they just provided a better service than you did. Why shut them down when you could just copy what they have and make them unnecessary? And then in the process they try to softban nsfw as well because "ItS bAd FoR aDvErTiSmEnT!" god how I fucking hate capitalism.

There's this beautiful thing that people have created in collaboration which brings joy, news, entertainment, education, support and community to so many people and it was ALREADY PROFITABLE but no we need to ruin it to squeeze out as much cash as possible.

Fuck all those people who helped build the website and make it what it is today, fuck all the users who contributed it and spent sleepless nights to make some dumb pixel art bringing your shitty ass website into the news all across the globe fuck all the moderators who spent countless hours doing unpaid labour to keep a community they loved alive and saving you billions in moderation costs, fuck everyone that loves this website

BECAUSE WE WANT MORE MONEY!

Growth for the sake of growth is the ideology of a cancer cell and for reddit the diagnosis is terminal.

#fuck reddit #fuck capitalism #fuck u/spez #reddit #r/196 #196 #r196 #reddit migration #rant

[clk-deserves-better]

Woo Ragi Character Analysis

Honestly, Ragi isn't even close to my favourite member in the cast. I prefer CLK, Ollim or Garam. However, the dude's arc is interesting as hell (entire novel spoilers). This post turned into a Ragikyung ship analysis half way through and is very long so.. be prepared for some rambling.

So, what do we know about Woo Ragi? We know that he is a homophobe who doesn't fully think things through considering how he treats CLK. He looks down on others for being weaker/ less attractive than he is. He's outright cruel and people let him have his way.

Ragi, when CLK first enters his mind, puts him on pending causing damage to CLK's body. Kim Ollim is harsh to CLK and despises him yet doesn't land him in the hospital, most likely knowing that her hatred was not worth sacrificing their goal, unlike Ragi. In fact, no other Red Lotus member calls into contention CLK's purpose when visiting them which makes Ragi look a lot worse. Ragi is the odd one out here, lacking the smarts to realise the rarity of necromancers or the forethought to understand hurting the contractor might risk the future of his guild (especially since he would be able to feel Ollim, Dawon, and Garam's souls attached to CLK). How does he fit in with the rest of the members?

We answer this question when CLK gets stuck with him in that weird pocket dimension. He's not smart, he's not thoughtful but he is obedient to Seo Dawon. Just like readers complaining about CLK, this man is simply being puppeted by Seo Dawon within the guild.

He is uniquely the only member who spent time with Dawon at school. Seo Dawon never explained anything to him and that was just "how he was". He then describes how he and Ollim were the only survivors of a dungeon due to Dawon's advice confirming his already existing attitude.  This begs the question, if Ragi has never questioned Dawon due to him not being curious, what was his relationship with Dawon?

 He always seems completely overpowered by Dawon: like a declawed cat. He watched on as Dawon dated his crush, he watched on as Dawon's girlfriends harassed him/his colleagues and he watched on as Dawon prioritised CLK over him in all instances. He continues to trust Dawon even though Dawon is an extremely shitty friend to him. Considering Ragi being a horrible person to CLK and all the other members talking about how Ragi always got his way, Dawon is a very strange case. Dawon doesn't even attempt to 'fight back' with Ragi, he just shows his anger and Ragi usually backs down. We have no reasons as to why this relationship exists between them so it is most likely not necessary for understanding Ragi. The two sharing this relationship is the more important point.

The first time we see Ragi seem different from his original impression is the pocket dimension. Ragi carries CLK on his back for hours and simultaneously fights off monsters. CLK is at his weakest in these moments while sleeping on Ragi's back, he's a physical burden who is powerless in all ways. Ragi doesn't try and force him to walk mid-way through or allow CLK to fall off his back. He also physically embraces CLK against his contract when CLK stares down at a dead-looking Lackey although the action is unnecessary to CLK's survival. If CLK is in genuine distress, Ragi does stop being an asshole it seems.

All this doesn't mean he is a loving being while in the dimension. He leaves CLK on the floor crying and begging for him, he attempts to check for injuries on a recently blinded man with no warning causing CLK to feel violated and does still enjoy CLK being in pain throughout. As a little consolation, he does let CLK punch him three times but that doesn't really cover the damage. Ragi isn't suddenly a good person but we do learn that there is a threshold to his sadism.

In the hospital, while he enjoys teasing CLK by moving the fruit away from him and enjoys CLK's expression when consuming Kyungsik's concoction, he still cuts the fruit. By stacking all the fruit for CLK to eat, we see that Ragi is starting to soften up somewhat. The way Ragi breaks his sneering demeanor to tell CLK to continue eating shows that he prioritises CLK's health over his own habitual insulting/ uncaring persona.If Ragi were truly hateful of CLK, he would insult him and continue to eat the fruit in front of him.

For a large amount of time in the book, Ragi stays in this state. Ragi is no longer angry at CLK, simply insulting him without despising him. He no longer seethes in anger at Dawon and CLK. They become more and more of a thing but Ragi doesn't seem to hate the two, only asking them to be affectionate elsewhere. Considering Ragi's feelings towards other partners of Dawon, him accepting CLK is a step out of what he usually feels.

Ragi seems hostile in the beginning but they soon fall into quips and barbs at each other, CLK describes it as a "stand-up comedy routine". The other servants insult CLK and CLK does not fight it yet he feels comfortable doing so around Ragi. Ragi no longer gets what he wants here. He doesn't try to get what he wants either and just allows a rhythm for their interactions to form. There is something different about CLK than most people in Ragi's mind. While this may be mostly down to the system, I'd like to partially believe that Ragi does care for CLK more than he'd admit.

CLK and Ragi's relationship is intriguing. It's the first time we see that CLK isn't overwhelmed by one of his servants. He doesn't get scared of his breathing or crack like with Ollim who was similarly hostile. He teases Ragi as soon as he gets out of the hospital. CLK doesn't let Ragi's demands get to him and the servants seem genuinely delighted by how CLK manages to control Ragi.

You see that their relationship has grown from initial hatred when travelling in the van to Geum Miyoung's slush funds. He has some sort of affection here towards CLK, prodding at his symbol on CLK's ear. The symbol creates a "satisfied" feeling in the servant and so, Ragi pressing the symbol here comes off as affectionate. He doesn't even attempt to insult CLK harshly and says he has a "discerning eye" for liking his face. This is ironic coming from Ragi who taunted CLK for being a "homo" for many chapters. Ragi is changing, whether it be down to the system or his feelings, this isn't the Ragi Dawon wants around.

I believe Ragi becomes aware of his affections for CLK in chapter 304. CLK talks about all the servants looking worried for him: this must include Ragi. Ragi can no longer claim hatred or indifference toward CLK anymore. After CLK tells his servants he is starting, Ragi goes upstairs. Ragi has always been a loner but never to the point of actively leaving his guild's side which means something must have happened. Ragi is trying to hide something from the guild/CLK.

CLK hypothesises this is due to him not wanting a reaction with the blood which is understandable as he is the only servant who has no skinship with CLK and must feel the full effects of the system. This understanding allows CLK to accept his actions and allow what is "more comfortable" for Ragi. In this moment, Ragi's persona is breaking down and he is truly aware of his role as a servant. Ragi cannot insult his way out of the truth or get his way by hurting someone, he can only deny it by hiding what he feels. CLK's words emphasise CLK knows this with Ragi's "glance" back proving that Ragi was caught off guard by his words. CLK understands, Ragi denies it but knows all the same.

As a quick note, let's stick a pin in Kyungsik and CLK's conversation too. Ragi comes up as a person to be wary of due to his lack of affection towards CLK to the point Kyungsik gives him a love potion. The love potion is poignant as it symbolises the belief that CLK doesn't think Ragi cares for him. It is not used until later on so keep this in mind.

For an entire cast development, we watch as the servants give up on resurrection altogether. All of them. All at once. They are all angry at CLK for his self-sacrificial BS and refuse the goal that had previously kept CLK from thinking they prioritised him. It is no longer "we're using you for this goal", it has become clear that they want the best for him in that moment. Ragi is included like the rest of the servants here so I thought it should be mentioned.

After the gang escapes to KHS's mansion from Issac, Ragi teaches CLK the "deadly kiss" move which causes the servant to gain more power if kissed by CLK. Dawon is officially CLK's boyfriend at this point and has made all physical affection towards CLK feel like "sinning" in the words of Kyungsik. He tells CLK to only use the move on him which is.. stereotypically Dawon of him. Despite this, after Ragi gets summoned to fight Issac, he does kiss CLK. This is the first ever time we've seen Ragi make a move that goes directly against what Dawon has told him to do.

Considering how he never has questioned Dawon and has watched Dawon be an appalling human being in general, we know Ragi has transformed here. He is no longer a pawn under Dawon's thumb as he was more focused on giving CLK the potion (his health) than his old position as Dawon's puppet. Dawon seems to recognise Ragi's affection too "Didn't I tell you to maintain a distance from Choi Leekyung " is what Dawon taunts him with. He bites Ragi's lip for daring to go against his orders. Ragi doesn't care now. Ragi may not directly call out Dawon but when push comes to shove, he protects and cares for CLK more than his inclinations to his guildmaster.

The tragic attempt at fighting Jaemin results in CLK essentially resetting the world with only the guild members remembering what had occurred before the reset. Dawon has locked up a confused CLK who lacks all memories except a few about their relationship. Kyungsik and Ragi help CLK get out of the mansion. CLK believes the potion is what helps keep Ragi in line but that is simply untrue. Ragi is resistant to the love potion Kyungsik made and is only helping out of his own affection towards CLK.

Ragi is physically affectionate towards the CLK who no longer remembers yet still gets annoyed with Kyungsik’s insinuation of Ragi’s affection though. He tells Kyungsik that he’s not putting on a “gay show” for him. Ragi is beginning to accept his own affection for CLK but hasn’t yet fully accepted his own queerness. This is all without the contract. Ragi has no system or potion that has influenced his love for CLK here. His love is genuine (so is Kyungsik's but Kyungsik has much more reluctance) unlike Garam, Ollim, Eunji, and Chan Young who all obey their guild master's unethical treatment of CLK.

Ragi has shown he is truly the most reliable. It was revealed that he fought Dawon on this issue and is rightfully annoyed at Dawon pushing the guild out of issues involving CLK. Kyungsik is shocked by this due to Ragi never fighting with Dawon. He has gone against the man who can no longer truly give him what he needs. Dawon used to be trustworthy, even at his worst but Ragi no longer is inclined to believe Dawon still is.  The questioning of Dawon's decisions brings him his own independence and the potential to no longer look down on others. CLK has shown Ragi that he can care for people who are weaker than him.

CLK returns to the Jaemin fight via time travel, getting the happy ending this time. CLK kisses Ragi on the earlobe (probably a reward for being one of the only non-cowardly guild members). The book concludes with Ragi confessing his love for CLK on the wedding day.  CLK weds Dawon and the two go on a honeymoon. A pretty depressing arc end, right? CLK is happy though so Ragi can only hope to move on.

Overall, Ragi is a character who develops from a crass homophobe who couldn't think for himself to a guy who stood up for what he believes and is able to care for those weaker than him. He finally accepted himself as bisexual and despite all the tragedy of his love, he can move on to find a partner of his own.

#necromancer survival #nezongi #choi lee kyung #woo ragi

[gloryride]

3 and 18 for both Virgile and Vanessa on the oc questions thing? 👀

Thanks for asking ♥♥ the question about weapon is perfect, as i replay with both, i thought about it ^^

[oc asks if you're interested]

weapon of choice? any particular reason they chose their weapon?

VANESSA

Vanessa prefers not to kill, but to go behind their backs to neutralise enemies or knock them out. Her favourite? A good old-fashioned baseball bat! She has two of them, a pink one and a gold one, but any improvised weapon that can stun works too.

When it comes to guns, she's team silent power pistol. Small, discreet and effective, it's undetectable. In game, she first uses Kongou, then Seraph offered by Padre, with a silencer installed. And after PL, Her Majesty silent pistol, a real gem!

And when it's there to eliminate, especially the scavs for whom it shows no mercy, it's SMG! A good machinegun does a great job killing the bastards. She loves the Militech M221 Saratoga SMG, and even have the Fenrir. In my hc, a Maelstromer gave this gun as a gift !

VIRGILE

He's a netrunner, so he doesn't need a weapon to take down enemies. Virgil doesn't like killing, so he prefers to knock out his enemies using hacks rather than killing them for good (even though he works with Valentin, who is quick on the trigger). So he's made his own daemons and hacks to suit his needs, enabling him to neutralise the enemy without violence.

But having a weapon is always useful. As a nomad, he learned to shoot rifles from his grandfather and knows how to use precision rifles, such as the SOR-22, a rifle common in the Free States. But he prefers tech rifles, and has a Militech M-179 Achilles that he takes with him when he works in the Badlands. In game, he has the Widow Maker, and I have hc that Panam gave him after picking it up from Nash (a reconciliation gift).

But a rifle isn't always handy, so he's got a pistol. I hesitated for a long time between a smart and a tech pistol, but I preferred the smart, because he can use smart-targeting more easily. A smart boy can only use a smart gun! In game, he first got a Kang Tao A-22B Chao, and now I'm waiting until I get to Dogtown to give him a nice Tusnami Kappa whose design I think is too cool, and especially the Crimestopper iconic because he has a chance of uploading Cripple Movment quickhack + CRIT damage!

their opinion on lying, stealing, and killing?

VANESSA

Vanessa a moral compass on a case-by-case basis Lying: not a big deal, if it's not malicious or to protect someone. Everyone lies a little, don't they? On the other hand, she doesn't lie to her family. At worst, she avoids the question! Stealing : from the corpo? that's good, you've got to rip those scumbags off. For her, it would just be a way of spreading the wealth more evenly. Robbing the bastards too, that's fine. The rest is morally questionable. Killing: scavs, shitty corpos, assholes … some people deserve to die, she doesn't even think about it. After that, she's against wanton murder and attacking innocent people. She would never accept a contract to kill a decent person.

VIRGILE

Virgile is very strict about the way he believes Lying: he hates people lying to him, and prefers a hurtful truth to a lie. Does he lie? Of course, but it's mostly to hide something about himself, or silly lies where he quickly gets caught out because he's such a bad liar. But in general, he's honest. Stealing: apart from data on the net, he doesn't steal. Killing: He hates killing, it repulses him. He has fewer scruples when it comes to scavs or raffens, but he rarely kills anyone unless forced to by the situation.

#cyberpunk 2077 #about : vanessa vergara #about : virgile sarto #thanks for asking #love the moral question and the duality between the grey moral of a streetkid and nomad honesty

[belmottetower]

Ask meme: Sam/Rebecca

When I started shipping it if I did: In the first episode where all the team walks past Rebecca and Sam and Roy are the only two to greet her.

Ok, ok I didn't quite ship it this early, but the seeds were definitely sown when they sent Sam to get Rebecca to come along to the curse breaking ceremony. Why Sam, huh? WHAT DID THE REST OF THE TEAM SEE?!

My thoughts: Sam/Rebecca are my favourite endgame ship for both of them. I love that before their relationship starts they do already have some really nice moments in S1 - the above corridor hello and office scene, and then in the last episode of season 1 during Ted's speech, Sam and Rebecca sitting next to each other in the dressing room. And when I say sitting next to each other I don't mean Sam is near the front so Rebecca ends up sitting next to him randomly, I mean he is right in the middle so she clearly sought him out. Please see her looking at him in concern as he has his head in his hands, and then in a later shot HER HAND ON HIS SHOULDER and the other resting on/by his thigh! She has her arm around him!

And then in season 2, their relationship starts in such an organic and open way. They don't know who they're talking to, they just know that they have a connection and a spark. And then when they realise who the other is yes Rebecca is hesitant due to the age, but Sam doesn't pause for one second, he is just fucking thrilled!

I know that there are people with concerns about age, but I think Sam is shown to be one of the strongest, most firm in his convictions and frankly the most mature of all the team - and I include Roy in that much as I love him. Rebecca didn't seek him out, it just happened and they worked.

There are other concerns about her being his boss. Aside from the fact that the club owner, day to day, has far less say over the players than the manager does - and players have pretty tight contracts and agents to look after their interests - there is a precedent for this relationship in real life. When Karren Brady was managing director of Birmingham FC she met her husband, a player, married him - and then he was transferred by the club twice during this time, a fact that makes me laugh whenever I think about it.

I do not know if they'll be endgame, they probably won't be, but I really love the way their relationship developed. Also "for next time" and "I'm only going to get more wonderful" are extremely smooth lines. Sam has game.

What makes me happy about them: I love how their relationship started, I love that Sam is so kind and generous - Rebecca deserves that after Rupert. I love that they are so easy and relaxed around each other right from the start. They have great chemistry and I think they are - and would - be so good for each other.

What makes me sad about them: That they will probably not be endgame. But I'm glad I got to see a little bit of it anyway.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: Their relationship being ignored or completely written off as a giant mistake that one or both of them regret People thinking it's problematic because Rebecca is his boss, without minding that Rebeccca is Ted's boss and has far more of a say over Ted's career than she does Sam's

Things I look for in fanfic: Any fanfic about them wherein their relationship is the focus point, and not just a stepping stone or a moment to regret.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: There isn't anyone else on the show I really ship either of them with strongly, but there also isn't anyone I would be uncomfortable with either of them ending up with.

My happily ever after for them: I would like them to get married and live happily ever after and Rebecca doesn't care about a single shitty double standard tabloid article written about her because she has an extremely hot husband who loves her so fuck them.

Who is the big spoon/little spoon: I think Sam is probably the big spoon, but he'd like to be spooned from time to time.

What is their favourite non-sexual activity: Watching films together - Sam wins her over to Ratatouille. They eat out at his restaurant a lot. He does not hire a rat as a chef though.

#ted lasso fanfic #sam obisanya x rebecca welton #fandom: ted lasso #sam x rebecca #sam obisanya #rebecca welton

[definitelynotdamiano]

Hi! I don't want to re-start the R&l debate but there is a new episode of Apple music with Zane Lowe and Matt Bellamy and they talk about Må dropping r&l (around min 44, if you're interested)

It's so sad to see Zane's opinion on the band in this because he actually said good things about the band before and now he super disagrees with all this and looks kinda disappointed? Also Matt saying that you need to stick to your fans over promotion, yup

If you don't want the start of a new debate in your asks, don't post this. It's totally fine. I get it. I just thought that you might be interested in seeing this

Hi <3

Thanks for telling me about it, it was interesting to listen to their opinions (I posted this part of the episode here).

I loved Zane's interview with them (one of my favourite Må interviews I've seen), he actually knew what he was talking about, and it was about music, and I actually enjoyed it. So yeah, it's sad, but not surprising that he's disappointed.

I think it's interesting what Matt said about their contract, and that this decision (dumb and short-sighted, may I add) maybe wasn't theirs to make. He mentioned 360 deals that some artists are getting and it's what maybe, allegedly, who knows, sonydontcomehere they got. It's not a news that bands/artists who become successful very quickly are often given shit deals and have very little control over anything (yes, even though their manager is their friend), and that could be the case with them too.

As much as I don't like this whole thing, I'm trying to focus just on this: it's a stupid decision in the long run, doesn't matter who made it.

Before anyone comes after me, please remember that I'm just a fan. I know nothing about the decisions that are made, about how much control the band has, about music industry in general. I've just been a fan of some popular artists and saw how shitty their contracts were.

#ask #discourse

[silly-lil-g00se]

I need to vent about irl stuff somewhere. So if it's not for you, then it's not for you.

I've inquired about this room for rent a while back, and it had been a wild rolercoster of shit not being what they needed from me, and a lot of changes had to be made, plus my god forsaken landlord was not cooperative which made things so much more dificult and took more time. But very long story short, I now have the contract and all even when I genuinely started thinking that they might not want to proceed with me. And so all the anxiety I went through during the weekend because they don't work those days and I just sat in my current shitty room twiddling my thumbs and hoping for the best was not needed.

All is finally okay. And now I'm just anxious about actually moving and all that. Plus, I'm having a call that's supposed to make the move easier for me and smoother, but it's so nerve-wracking. The appointment, yes, appointment is set for 90 minutes. What do you do for that much time. Do you want my whole life story. Cause that would probably be enough time for that. Even my therapy sessions were shorter. So now I'm worried that I might not be prepared for whatever that is. Because at first I thought I knew what that appointment was about. But 90 minutes??? That simply does not make sense. I hope they're just giving way more time in case some people are slow or need accommodations.

But I guess if I got so far, I'll be able to get through this. All I need is not to break down. I'll be moving in a couple of days. How bad can this experience be? I feel like I've gone through the worst, but I guess I'll finally feel relaxed when I spend the first night at my new place. Especially since I've had a fever for the past few days so I've been so out of it and just trying to think with my last braincell was dificult as all living hell. Especially since the company loves calling me at the worst times and almost always I've had to call them back. So just the social interactions while all I wanted to do was lay in bed and suffer was not my favourite thing to do.

Uhh. So yeah, for now all has been well. I have high hopes that all is good. Plus I already have a contract so they can't kick me out for no reason. So I will be housed in the near future. Hope it's gonna be quieter than my current place. And to be fair most places do not have all this noise. This place has me genuinely losing patience. I'm a patient man, but god damn this is more than I want to handle. The people that live here do not care about anyone but themselves. Especially whoever the motherfucker above me is. Because they stomp so loudly and at reasonable hours I get it do whatever, but at like 1 am.. please think of the people around you.

#vent post #adult things that still make me anxious even if i moved several times at this point #im tired and still sick #i need more Paracetamol in my system to deal with thes shit

[ewoo]

I forgot to post this ages ago so im doing it now:

Man, that flashback episode really reminded me of all the things I hate about Zoox and Devo.

(Which speaks to the McElroys bc I'm pretty sure I am supposed to, if not hate, at least dislike these aspects of their characters)

For Zoox - It's mostly just that he's very callous and easily offended? Which to be fair to him, he's basically a toddler so it's pretty understandable. Just sometimes it rubs me the wrong way, like when he was talking to Hermine about Finneas' lantern and being offended when she tries to keep, what is ostensibly, the corpse of her friend that, to him, is just a lantern with no meaning ascribed to it other than it is his.

My main problem is that this characterisation seems mostly incidental and is framed as positive and at other times he seems rather willing to give things to other people - not a greedy guy for the most part which made the whole thing seem a bit weird to me, but it could just have been a tonal disparity.

Devo is just an asshole. He constantly explodes at people and blames them for things that aren't really their fault (example: Finneas, the sallow) and doesn't provide any constructive feedback alongside his complaints of other people (again: sallow). He's also kind of a hypocrite in that he gets easily offended at things and also seems surprised at people being hostile to him despite his poor treatment of them (see: the bar fight, enlisting the biggest baby). He doesn't really apologise and when he does I feel as if it's often about the wrong thing, just the wrong time or he makes the situation more about him. The apologising thing might just be something he learned from the church, though.

On the subject of the church I feel a large disconnect between the story Devo is telling and the story we are seeing (specifically the lantern room), but I think that might just be due to Travis and Griffin not really discussing it properly between them. I got the impression the lantern memory was worse in Travis's mind than it turned out to be, it was still bad, don't get me wrong, but Guidance was being kind of a good teacher the entire time (as in: there were no threats or punishments, just gentle encouragement - it was a discussion). Which isn't to say I like her - she's a gaslighting, lovebombing bitch. (Specifically: when they talked to her for their contract)

I honestly have no complaints about Amber. She's a well-written, well rounded character who is consistent in both her flaws and her strengths. She's a badass woman who lived through the apocalypse, I don't know what to tell you.

I'm not going to lie: I really don't like Devo. And I really preferred the scientist over him. (He was fun. Hope he shows up again)

But also Devo is somehow my favourite of the three and I'm excited to see how Devo manages his anger issues (which he's acknowledged he has! love that for him) and further develop as a character. As well as potential for seeing what the Church/Hand Of Benevolence is really like (I want them to be really shitty).

All of this to say that a lot of people like this exist and props to Travis and Clint in making me have lots of conflicting feelings about Devo and Zoox

#taz #taz ethersea #taz ethersea critical #not really but just in case #zoox anthellae #devo la main

[feeisamarshmallow]

.

#my favourite thing about my shitty shitty contract #is that i can't access any of the mental health resources #because the system views me as stuck in between two categories and doesn't know what to do with me #and i'm too afraid to bring it up to my superiors #because i don't want anyone looking too closely at my contract #when people tell me they think i should be talking to someone #I KNOW #I WISH I WAS TOO #mental health rant #fyi i'll tag all this stuff with mental health rant so you can blacklist the tag if you want to

[kingofterrors]

Imogen in CR 3 Episode 2

So to preface...

I love Imogen a normal amount. Yup. Nothing to see here.

With that out of the way, let me shower upon you some of my favourite moments and dialogue snippets from Ep 2 that I think show us some interesting stuff about our favourite pastel sorcerer.

Timestamps are for the Twitch VOD.

01:24:05 - How to keep secrets, Laudna-style LAUDNA: Imogen and I don’t talk to anyone. IMOGEN: [wistfully] No…, not really. ASHTON: You two seem like you have a really good thing going on. You should… you should keep that up. It seems nice. LAUDNA: [wide grin] It’s pleasant.

In this exchange, Laudna shows no signs that she minds ‘not talking to anyone’. The loneliness that she mentions a little later isn’t a factor, it seems, when she has Imogen in her life. Imogen, on the other hand... seems less happy about it. She and Laudna have clearly been keeping their distance from people for a while, and that’s a painful thing.

01:25:35 - The Morality of Working for Lord Eshteross IMOGEN: So we’d be the good guys?

This is interesting to me, because Imogen doesn’t seem to be asking this for reassurance. Her tone comes across as just looking for clarification. She just needs to know what they’re getting into. If Eshteross had said no, they would need to be the bad guys every once in a while, would she have turned down his offer? I’m not convinced she would have...

 01:27:26 - Public Spaces         In response to ‘talking things over’ immediately being equated by Ashton to ‘more drink’ IMOGEN: [shifts uncomfortably] Taverns, huh?

We know Imogen’s not happy being in crowds or busy places, and this is just more evidence to back that up. Nor is this only an issue when she’s overreached with her powers either. This was before she opened herself up a little too much at the warehouse. Imogen just doesn’t like the busyness and loudness of your average tavern, full stop.

01:35:11 - Bertrand’s ‘Betrayal’ IMOGEN: You all right, Dorian? DORIAN: Hm? IMOGEN: Y’all right? DORIAN: A little… still a little… He was, uh… Right? And then with the… boom! IMOGEN: [to Bertrand, sharply now] So that was all just a test – you, you brought us in there just to… to have him fuck with us? And you didn’t warn us that he was gonna fuck with us?

Imogen has been pretty mild-mannered up to this point, with the exception of the moments when Laudna’s been at risk, or when she’s been particularly frustrated. Now, though, we see some real sharpness from her. Bertrand treated the whole group in a very shitty way, and she’s absolutely willing to pull him up for it. Her body language whenever Bertrand talks says a lot too. She simply doesn’t trust a word that comes out of his mouth. She watches him like a hawk.

I’m fascinated to see how she works with Bertrand next episode on this basis...

01:46:19 - Pate de Rolo IMOGEN: I never get used to it. I never get used to it. Two years, and I never get used to it. ORYM: How often does it happen? IMOGEN: [a long beat] Too often.

Imogen has been consistently supportive of everything Laudna’s said or done up to this point - even the weird moments greeted with an affectionate smile. This, though, is a step too far. Two years of Pate de Rolo being in her life, and it still creeps her out. Why is it this, especially?

01:56:32 - Dorian’s Advice DORIAN: These, ah, aristocratic types… Might I offer a small suggestion? IMOGEN: [visibly sits up and focuses] DORIAN: If he does contract us… IMOGEN: Mm hm? DORIAN: Let’s ensure that whatever you need as far as connections to get into the library, to find this book… We’ll make sure it’s in the contract. Yes? IMOGEN: [wide-eyed] That’s brilliant! DORIAN: Put it in writing. IMOGEN: I wouldn’t have thought of that. Thank you. DORIAN: Well, he had a big desk, and if the contract isn’t on fire then I think we should ask to include it. IMOGEN: Yeah, uh, Dorian? That was your name? DORIAN: Yes. IMOGEN: All right. Thank you. DORIAN: Of course. IMOGEN: [looks thoughtful]

Look at her face!

Until now, Imogen’s been gently floating along with this group. There’s been an opportunity waved in front of her, and she’s been willing to work with this strange mix of folk if it gets her closer to her goal. She’s been perfectly friendly and polite, of course. But from her reaction here, she’s never considered that any of them might be looking out for her in any way. This is a wake-up call, but in the nicest of ways. Could it be that Dorian actually cares about what she wants or needs? Beyond pure politeness or convenience? Look at the shock! And her response is to check his name. Suddenly he’s someone worth remembering.

Outside of Laudna, nobody’s done much to help Imogen lately, I’d bet.

02:55:53 - Failing that Wisdom Save MATT: The load of whispers is becoming difficult to keep at bay. And so for the remainder of the day any concentration checks are made with disadvantage until you take a long rest, as the oppressive thoughts of the world around you continue to push deeper and deeper into your mind against your will.

So here’s what it’s like. Even outside of Imogen actually trying to use her ability, her daily life is full of the experience of the constant presence of ‘the oppressive thoughts of the world’. No wonder she doesn’t like taverns.

03:43:29 - Do Crimes ASHTON: How many of you have actually crimed before? [Laudna puts her hand up cheerily] IMOGEN: Well… sort of… it… LAUDNA: Mine was kind of survival though… IMOGEN: Yeah, we don’t do on a… habit…

So they have definitely done crimes, but because they had to, not because they wanted to. Imogen feels guilty about it too - unlike Laudna, who seems absolutely chill about being less than lawful. I wonder what crimes ‘survival’ pushed them to?

03:56:28 - ‘You Just Hear Everything?’ IMOGEN: We can go in tonight. I’m just a little… distracted. FCG: Are you having some anxiety? Do you wanna talk about it? IMOGEN: You could call it that. No, I would not like to, but I… yeah… FEARNE: You just hear everything? IMOGEN: [sighs deeply and pauses for a moment] Sometimes, Fearne. Yeah. FEARNE: That’s a lot. IMOGEN: [smiles gently and pauses for a beat] Yeah.

This exchange says so much. Imogen treats FCG’s questions and expressed concerns throughout this episode as politeness - just the way they are, rather than any kind of genuine deep interest in her. And then, in the midst of her battling against the voices that are, lest we forget, ‘continuing to push deeper and deeper into your mind against your will’, here comes Fearne.

And Fearne... just... says it. Out loud. Ridiculously simply. ‘You just hear everything?’ And you can see Imogen wrestling with how to respond. Because there’s a sense there that she has been seen, perhaps the first time outside of Laudna, for a very long time. Someone has listened to what she’s saying, and understands, if only on a very superficial level, what she’s going through. And she’s not sure how to deal with that. The sigh, the long pause, as she decides how to move forward. And her decision is to assume that Fearne’s understanding is superficial. She decides not to reveal more about herself, or to go deeper. She lets this moment be as simple as she possibly can. ‘Sometimes, Fearne. Yeah.’

But then Fearne takes that next step. She has not only seen Imogen, but she empathises with her. ‘That’s a lot.’ And again, Imogen is taken aback. How does she deal with this? ‘A lot’ is a massive understatement! This is the battle she fights every day, to exhaustion, to pain! Yes, it’s a lot! But here, now, with her relationship with Fearne as new as it is, she can’t show any of that. Look at the pain on her face when she finally responds. She almost seems close to tears, and she looks away, breaking eye contact. It’s too much, but it seems that, even if only for a minute, she was grateful that someone has seen through her facade even if only to the smallest degree.

Someone give this woman a hug.

#critical role #critical role campaign 3 #critical role spoilers #cr spoilers #imogen temult #imogen meta #i absolutely love her a normal amount. for sure. indeed. #i am just loving watching this character emerge even just over these couple of episodes #laura is telling us so much about her with every detail of her body language her words her expressions #it's theatre and i adore it #can't wait to learn more about her!

[lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks]

okay finally finished my Kim Possible binge and I have opinions

It was nice to see a show with an actual decent finale, (unlike SOME shows I could mention) nice to see Ron's whole Monkey Magic arc pay off

and speaking of that, Ron's monkey phobia was surprisingly consistent, was caused by a pretty genuinely traumatic event, and not played as a one off joke, and he overcame the fear gradually and by befriending a monkey (that he thought was Kim because monkey magic shenanigans)

a thing I hated tho was the tweebs, more specifically how they got away with so much bullshit that the parents barely called them out on, the episodes with Kim and the tweebs have them do something shitty to her, have her be angry at them the whole time, and then have them save the day as if Kim was in the wrong for being angry at them when they have been genuinely nothing but shitty to her 90% of the time

they steal and destroy her stuff, publicly humiliate her regularly, and her parents do jack shit about it, easily the part of the show I despised the most

and even when they do help her (like rebuild a whole car for her) they won't do it without forcing her into a literal contract that benefitted them more, like they don't already owe her for literally stealing her shit all the time

the 'younger siblings getting away with everything' trope drives me fucking nuts I stg and this show was such a hideous offender

the villains are still some of my favourite cartoon villains of all time, they are all absolutely hilarious and enjoyable, Drakken is a national treasure (with Shego girlbossing him into semi-competence), Senor Senior Senior and Senor Senior Junior will never not make me laugh my ass off, I love them so much, the fact that Senior decided to be evil simply because he's rich and bored was *mwah* chef's kiss, beautiful, and his dysfunctional relationship with his himbo son was perfect comedy

there's also the fact that Kim could be a kickass superhero and also really feminine and care about fashion and boys and that was never really played negatively, there was a whole episode where she got a job just to buy a super trendy jacket and the show didn't really act like that was a bad thing, in fact she even got the jacket (despite the joke in the end that made her not want it anymore)

a lot of the teen issues they went through felt pretty genuine, Ron's insecurity was a consistent flaw and Kim overworking herself and not wanting to give up on anything was very On Brand

as much as I absolutely adore Ron's whole character he drove me nuts on occasion, one time he falls into the infuriating trope of overhearing only half a conversation and leaving before getting context, and in another episode he is just a straight up asshole who absolutely refused to do his half of a science project and even critiqued Kim for not doing a good enough job on their last one

he also fell into the overnight millionaire trope where he loses all his money by the end of the episode (though he didn't spend it all, it was stolen because he was flashing his cash too publicly), a trope he didn't fall into was when he got kissed by Bonnie, Kim didn't immediately blame him, she believed him right away

though I don't understand why Kim would help Bonnie after that, like at all, Bonnie is a terrible person, but that does fall in line with Kim's 'have to help everyone' thing which does make for an interesting character flaw

also I'm putting my grubby adhd hands on Ron he's one of us now I'm claiming him, boy is impulsive as hell, has a new hobby every other week and has absolutely no volume control or filter

in conclusion, amazing show, still holds up, nice art style, best villains, consistent characterisation, very tropey, a lotta running gags, an absolute product of the times, which actually makes it rather enjoyably nostalgic, not sure how it might be to someone not intimately familiar with mid 2000s culture tho

a warning if you plan on watching on Disney+, they have it in air order instead of production order, so there's a few continuity issues, more prominently in season 3

it was nice to step back into an old childhood hyperfixation for a while ✨

now to decide what the binge next!

#lula's life #kim possible

[yourtamaki]

a kind dream, a cold reality

keigo x f!reader

word count: 1.9k

warnings: angst, hurt no comfort, neglect

there was peace in stability. when exciting beginnings morphed into routine, safe knowing exactly how your days would pan out.

there was also distance. when love declarations became monotone, more habit then heartfelt and kisses become another chore to check off a list.

when did domesticity become purgatory, doomed to repeat actions until all sparks of life had been drained away?

you stood in the kitchen, preparing dinner nearly on autopilot. you didn’t have to look at the time anymore, you’re own internal clock telling you there was 30 minutes until it was done, perfectly timed for when keigo came home from work.

for when he’s supposed to come home at least.

you tried to not think of how many meals had gone cold while waiting for him to return from wherever it was he decided was important to be then with you. at least the neighbours loved you, accepting the countless dishes that would otherwise have gone to waste. you wondered what lie you should tell them today. that you had made too much? that you were trying out a new recipe? you had plenty of time to decide.

setting the table was now a mindless activity, each plate and piece of cutlery placed just so across the dining table. when everything was in its rightful place, you brought out the pasta dish, setting it in the middle in a large bowl with tongs propped up inside. you could never guess how much keigo would eat on any given day so it was always best to let him serve himself. with nothing left to do, you took your seat before the empty plate, staring blankly ahead at where keigo was supposed to be.

you used to love this table. it had been the first thing you and keigo had bought together when you first moved in together. not a bed or a couch. a dining room table from a second hand store he insisted you had to go to because, “we need something alive with memories, songbird.”

you remember how you had both spotted it at the same time. tucked away in the corner, legs scuffed to hell but with the most beautiful dark oak surface you’d ever seen. you hadn’t realized how small it was either until you both sat down for the first time with shitty takeout because neither of you had thought to buy cookware. it was impossible for your knees not to bump into keigo’s, for his thigh not to end up between yours. you both loved the table too much to return it so you had to learn to adjust. now, it was your favourite aspect about the table, the added feeling of closeness as you shared a meal with the love of your life. it set the tone for the rest of your house, turning it from somewhere to live to a shared home.

these days, you had more space then you knew what to do with, your legs could swing under the table unobstructed. you hated it.

your stomach growled, the sound quickly swallowed up by the vast silence. you didn’t want to eat. not yet, not while there was a chance he showed up and you wouldn’t ruin your first meal together in who knows how long just because you got a little peckish. you could wait.

and wait you did.

you plated up a portion for yourself as the setting sun darkened the house, eating mechanically until your fork had nothing left to pick up. the next part was almost a ritual at this point. storing the food away in tupperware, cleaning the dishes, wiping down the kitchen so come morning you could start the cycle once more. you had perfected the routine down to every last detail. there was nothing left to do but get ready to sleep and lay in bed, idly playing with the crimson feather that hung around your neck.

you could refrain from touching it throughout the day but you couldn’t stand not holding it when you were alone in the too wide bed. you were supposed to be surrounded by hundreds of these feathers. you missed the way his wings would wrap around you during the night, pulling you into keigo’s chest. sleep wasn’t the same without them but you had no choice but to make do with the lone feather.

was this going to be the rest of your life? cooking meals no one would eat, cleaning an already spotless house, sleeping cold and alone? this isn’t the future keigo promised you when he got down on one knee, tears already streaming down his face. you weren’t naive, you knew there would be hard times in your marriage. it couldn’t be sunshine and roses all the time. you just thought he would be by your side when those times came.

a tapping at the window had you shooting up in bed in fear, head whipping towards the sound. an all too familiar outline was hovering outside, waving for you to open the window. you carefully made your way across the dark room. you’d unlatched the large window so many times it had become muscle memory and soon enough, your husband was flying through, landing lightly on his feet.

for a brief moment, a warm burst of love filled you. he was home, just an arm’s length away. you knew you’d forgive everything, everything, if he wrapped you up in a tight hug. the one that hurt your ribs and left your feet dangling in the air as he swung you around. the one where you felt his laugh more than heard it, you were pressed so close to his chest. that’s all you needed to remind yourself what you were fighting for. just one hug.

keigo walked past you without a word and the moment died. you think a piece of you died with it. an important piece. it would remind you of the better times, when you weren’t a wife but a girlfriend. when you were a priority in his life, when you could count on him dropping everything if you needed him. the piece that kept you together, kept you whole was gone and in its place was not emptiness but indifference.

“you’re really not going to say anything?” you didn’t understand why your voice came out so hoarse until you realized it was the first time you’ve used it all day. keigo didn’t pause as you broke the silence, continuing to undress with his back to you.

“‘m tired, songbird. can we do this later?” can’t he feel it? the precipice your relationship is on the edge of, threatening to fall and shatter into a thousand pieces at any moment? it dawns on you, watching him yawn and stretch, shaking out his feathers, that no. he doesn’t.

“keigo.” he turned to face you, blinking at the use of his name. always kei, never keigo. “i think i need a break. ”

he huffed out a confused laugh. “break from what?”

“a break from us.” you never knew silence could be so cold. so cold it left you shivering in its grasp. that’s the only explanation of why you were shaking so hard you had to clench your teeth to stop them from chattering.

“that’s not funny, dove.”

“i’m not joking.”

“why?” it was your turn to laugh, a broken, shrill thing that hurt your ears.

“you can’t think of one reason? one reason i’d have to be unhappy in this relationship?”

“look, i know i’m not around much these days but-“

“days? try months.” you felt nauseous at the sight of him, pale faced and eyes that darted around like a cornered animal looking for an escape. distantly, you realized this was unfair to him. you had ambushed him, gave him no preparation for what was quickly turning into a fight. but the hurt that had been growing inside you, gnarled and twisted with thorns that wrapped around your heart and shredded it with every beat demanded to be heard. you could flood your home with all the pain you housed.

“i’m sorry, songbird but i’m a hero. i work the hours commission tells me to. i can’t be here all day with you and you knew that when we first got together.”

“don’t try to make me sound unreasonable for wanting to spend time with my husband. i’m alone, keigo.”

“i know.”

“no you don’t! i am alone. i don’t have friends cause they all used me to get close to the number two hero. i had to sign a contract that said i wasn’t allowed to tell anyone where we lived. i don’t leave the house cause i’m terrified of someone recognizing me and using me against you. i am alone, keigo. with not even myself for company cause i don’t know who i am anymore outside of being your wife.”

he bowed his head, shoulders shaking though you didn’t know from what, his wings curling in as if to protect himself from your rant. “do you still love me?”

you sighed, your mouth opening and closing trying to think of how best to phrase what you felt towards him, “if i didn’t love you, i wouldn’t be telling you all this. i would’ve just left.”

“then stay. please. we can work through this. i'll be better, i’ll cut my hours. please, y/n. i can’t lose you.”

“i love you, kei. but i don’t think i was ever meant to be your wife.”

he was openly crying now, teary eyes meeting your dry ones. you didn’t know when you’d moved past that stage of grief but you were beyond grateful. it gave you the strength to power through this for the both of you. you owed him at least that kindness.

“that’s all you wanted once.” he whispered.

“the dream was kinder to me than the reality.” the truth of your statement was a punch to the gut. you’d wanted nothing more then to marry him, had daydreamed about it long before he popped the question. it felt like an inevitability. an intrinsic truth. the sky was blue. grass is green. you would be keigo’s wife someday. but love alone wasn’t enough to keep you two afloat. not when you’d been left alone to man a sinking ship. “i’ll take the couch and pack in the morning.”

“no! please if… if this is the last time…”

“it’s not forever, kei. just until i remember who i am outside of these walls.”

“still, can i hold you? please? just for tonight.”

you never could refuse him.

your bodies fit back together as though no time had passed since they’ve last held each other. despite the air still tense with emotion, you felt your body relax in his grasp, conditioned to associating the warmth of his chest against your back with safety. you knew in the morning, you’d wake up happy. the memories from tonight would be slow to trickle back in. but that was a problem for the future. tonight, you would savour the bliss of falling asleep with the person you loved most in the world. and you did love him. loved him so much it hurt. loved him enough to take this step back so he wouldn’t blame himself when he woke up one day and realized his wife had become a shell of herself.

#hawks x reader #hawks imagine #bnha x reader #bnha imagine #keigo imagine #keigo x reader #mha x reader #mha imagine #takami keigo x reader #takami keigo imagines

[khaleesiofalicante]

Tuesday is my new favourite day.

So, some thoughts on chapter seven.

Alec is the one who is terrified of the world and what it will do to him. But Magnus can’t help but feel like Alec is also the fearless one.

Yes, totally agree. I'm still dancing little dances because of the kiss in den Govenor's Residence.

He just needs Alec to be okay. He hates this feeling. He hates it when others get hurt because of him. He doesn’t like being the cause of another’s pain.

This is it, right? This is the thing we'll circle around. That Magnus will do everything to not hurt Alec, even when it means it will hurt himself – until he can no longer take it and breaks out.

He needs the key. The thought makes him realize that he wants it too. He wants the key.

And we all want you to have that key – and never give it bag …

Magnus has no idea about Alec’s father or what he will do to Alec. All he knows is that he will fight that man tooth and nail if he has to. He might not have the courage to do it in his own life. But he will find the courage for Alec.

There, right in the feels. And again, that's the reason why he breaks, right?

Magnus had wanted to go back home. That’s what he had said. And what a shitty fucking thing to say. Home. London was never home. Alec was home. Alec is home. Fuck London.

We know, Alec, we know. BUT ARE YOU INSANE? You can't just take advantage of Magnus like that. Again, presumably??

He would put it in all his contracts. Magnus had a condition that he would never remove his wedding ring. Not for any brand. Not for any photoshoot. Not ever. When Alec had found out about this condition, he had fucked the shit out of his husband.

Any chance you write THAT scene any day soon? Because this is such a Magnus thing to do. To take care of Alec's feelings by such nonnegotiable conditions no one would ever think about.

There was no winning for Alec. Not without Magnus.

Okay, now I cry.

“Thomas?” Alec says in confusion. The man goes tense at Alec’s voice. He removes himself from whoever he seems to be very publicly grinding into and turns around.

That was sooner than I thought, but on the other side – go Thomas, go Alastair!

“Magnus,” Alec calls. He doesn’t sound angry and annoyed. He sounds tired and heartbroken.

And the crying continues.

There are things he doesn’t remember that well. Things he is terrified he will soon forget. Magnus’ touch. His lips on Alec. His hands on Alec. All of it. He is terrified he’ll forget what it feels like to be loved by Magnus.

Did I mentioned that I'm crying?

“You don’t get to tell me what to do anymore,” Magnus snarls at him. “I never did. I always let you do whatever you wanted,” Alec chuckles sadly. “Maybe that was part of the problem.”

And here we are, in the eye of the hurricane, where we see a moment of clarity: that Alec and Magnus seemingly never really talked about their perspectives – or at least they failed to understand the other's point of view. It's sad to see everything crashing because of this.

“Divorce is never easy. I know you are both in pain. But this no way to act! I’m so disappointed in both of you.”

Aye, Mama Lightwood. Sometimes it needs a mother to set you on the right path again.

“Bapak,” Max whispers in his sleep. “Bapak. Come back. Bapak. Please.”

Max' suffering is so cruel. We know nothing of this kid's (in this AU) adoption story, but to think about how he found a family and now looses one of his parents, it's so so sad. I'm glad we know that he will get better and will talk to Magnus again.

David is there too. He is sitting in one of the chairs, his pale hand clasped tightly with Max’s dark one. His blue eyes are full of sorrow and Alec feels like a piece of shit.

David. Precious David. Don't let go of Max. Please.

The trailer ends. He hits replay.

Which trailer? WHICH TRAILER? Is Magnus in it?

“You could always go with your new friend Gabriel.” It’s David who says that. There is an awkward silence, just for a second. Max gives him a look. Then he just grins. It’s a smile he has learned from Magnus. “Gabriel is taking their mom.”

I wanna take their heads and literally clash them together. As Clary wants to do as well, it seems. And also the grin he learned from Magnus? I hope Alec is not as clueless as he pretends to be.

“I wanted to be with you today,” Jace says gently. “Are you okay?”

Best brother ever. That should be the award he is receiving all the time.

Even though his heart aches after seeing Jace and Clary with their family, he isn’t sure if he wants it. Not if it’s going to be painful and awkward and feel like shit. But he misses it though. You can miss something and still not want it, right?

GROWTH!!!! This is huge!!! First thought. Thinking he talks on having a family again. Second thought: Oh, okay, he means the family dinner of the four of them, one day after their anniversary? That surely is nothing you want to have when it's going to be awkward.

Thank you for this chapter!

Hellooooo.

Thank you for these beautiful and hilarious reactions ;)

I am love it!

Also - Alec is referring to the family hang out they originally agreed to do once a week when they got divorced. They have all been slacking lately :(

I'll see you Friday <3

#tlnd

[doomstypewriter]

Excuse me while I panic

Hello people. We’re finally there. I think that in one or two chapters this will be finally finished. Hope you’ve liked it so far. Thanks for all of the comments, they help a lot. Sorry for the angst, but I promise to make up for it with a nice happy ending. Anyway, enjoy

Word count: 640 | AO3 | <<Previous

Summary: Virgil has a rough time. Roman comes to confess.

CW: Self-hatred/deprecation, crying, swearing, mild angst (I think that's all, but if you find anything else, do tell).

Virgil plays Mr Loverman.mp3 on repeat to make himself feel worse

Virgil laid awake staring at the ceiling.

It wasn’t a new thing, of course, he did so more often than not.

There were too many things in his head at the moment, and, then again, that wasn’t new either, but it didn’t make it any easier. On one hand, Janus. Stupid damned Janus being funny, and familiar, and friendly and knowing him well. This whole unnamed and new dynamic they had going on felt strangely recognisable yet different. It felt good. Kind of honest.

Then there was Roman…

Virgil didn’t want to think about Roman but it’s not like he had a choice. He had cuddled him for hours. It was just like with Janus. Roman would hate the comparison, duh, but it rang true. Their relationship now felt recognisable and different at once.

The vinyl Roman had forgotten stood in front of him. He had picked it up when he spotted it.

A note attached to the back read: “to my favourite. Hope it makes you feel as I do”.

Which was ridiculously cryptic of him.

Feel what?

He hadn’t even added a list of the songs in the back of the cardboard case for him to check out. What was anyone supposed to understand by Roman’s behaviour? If only the Prince had the guts to be more forward…

Virgil chastised himself for those thoughts. That wishful thinking on his part would take him nowhere. Not to mention that feeding into the spiral of ideas and feelings surrounding Roman would just keep him awake longer.

Despite that, his mind kept going.

A wave of self-consciousness ran through him, giving him no choice but to let it carry him wherever. Virgil grabbed the headphones Logan had given him for Christmas and put on some depressing songs.

Might as well give in to the shitty mood and get over with it.

Stupid Roman.

Why did he always act like… like that… and then kept quiet?

Of course, he had to cry.

Was he that awful?

He might deserve the sweetness that Roman constantly used to address him, even if Virgil knew well that the Prince wasn’t aware of it, but he never got what followed after it.

The self-hatred got stuck to the roof of his mouth. Was it dread or nausea?

-------

His neck felt awful and cramped.

So did his left temple, sore, very sore.

Great.

He’d fallen asleep with the headphones on.

At least the few hours of rest had cleared up his pitiful mood. What time was it? His head turned to the digital clock on top of his bedside table, displaying in green light: 12:30 PM. Could be worse.

“Virgil!” Roman’s voice suddenly carried.

Just as Virgil fell off the bed in fright, Roman stumbled on his own pretty steps and hit the floor with a dry thud.

“Holy shit Roman!” he said, rising from behind the mattress. “Fucking knock”.

Roman rubbed his forehead as he groaned. Virgil felt so stupid when his stomach had the nerve to contract thinking it was kind of endearing.

“Sorry”.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever”.

He went to meet Roman quickly and help him up. His pale hands grasped the Prince’s forearm, while his eyes were glued on the image.

Nope.

That’s not what he needed right now.

Virgil looked at Roman’s face instead. Another mistake.

The Prince looked at him in awe. Not this again.

“Virge…” he mumbled. “I must tell you something”.

“Don’t you want some ice first?” he teased.

Virgil turned to the side after making sure Roman was up and stable, heading for the minifridge where he kept iced coffee and some other stuff.

“I love you”.

Fuck.

He turned around, again, very slowly. He saw Roman, standing very still with an expectant and hopeful expression.

“Yeah”, Virgil said after a sigh. Then he grimaced, “I already know”.

<<Previous | Next>>

Taglist: @itsjust-la-me , @bard-in-blue , @simplestoryteller , @winterwynd , @some-fander , @extraintrovertedalien , @the-sad-strawberry

#prinxiety #ts roman #ts virgil #sanders sides #prinxiety fanfiction #angst #doomywrites #doomstypewriter

[writingsbychlo]

I really wanna know your opinion on Steve Rogers cause you have like really good and strong opinions that I like to read and I dont know if I like him or not, its kinda like a love/hate relationship yk

well that is a hard question. lets unpack it.

I think the endgame situation was fucking shitty. like, I get that chris had a contract that was ending, or whatever, but yikes it really through his character into a bad light. so, lets put aside the logistics and talk about steve as a character.

okay but also these are my personal opinions and if anyone comes for me over them I'm gonna spiritually dick punch them.

tfa. he's noble and his heart is in the right place but fuuuuuck something about him pisses me off. I do like his development, though. he has to come to terms with himself, it's a war, I get it. but, he very clearly has something to prove to the world. I don't hate him, but it's not my favourite steve.

aa; steve is a nightmare in this fucking movie. like, okay, we get the excellent progress of him actually becoming captain, seeing some weird shit, and having to come to terms with the modern world. however, despite the struggles that were really good, he was a wee bit too big for his boots. he definitely tried too hard to be the best man at the table. just chill, steve, everybody is coming to terms with some stuff, you're doin a little too much.

ws; okay, steve hit his peak so far in this movie. we love some good strong morals paired with crime. fuck the government. love that for him. also, he is actually in the headspace to sacrifice himself for bucky, it creates some real good storyline which obviously gets fucking abandoned by endgame. I like steve in this movie. he's not too bad, he makes a good speech and a new friend, it's calm.

aou; I mean he's back to being a bit of a wet-wipe in the beginning but I will allow it. the struggle comes and they pull together, I think he's getting a better handle on the 'captain' part of it, and actually being a part of a modern team. I don't have many complaints about this steve. at least, nothing that immediately comes to mind.

cw; immediate what comes to mind is the words 'get in the fucking bin' but I will explain. now, I try not to focus too much on the actual situation because I have always been a little undecided on which side I would take. I wanna' say tony, because like the mess they continually make? I mean, wow. but at the same time, fuck the government they don't tell me what to do. however, it all got a bit dramatic, steve knew what happened to tony and didn't tell him, tony most likely would have forgiven it if steve hadn't lied by omission. so, yeah, there's liar steve and the dramatics and their airport fight I mean, yikes. I love bucky too but let's just stop and think things through, steve. fuck.

iw; I will allow it. the beard makes me slightly feral. I would probably fuck rogue steve or whatever everyone calls him after a drunk night in a bar so there's that. also he fistfights thanos with his bare hands so I gotta respect it, plus he's getting about in the stolen flying thing I forgot the word but you know what I'm talking about. he just gives off all kinds of good vibes. I can rock with it.

e; tony dies so I don't have a single thought about anyone else except for him in this movie but bucky in the jacket does look good? no, I'm kidding I have strong fucking opinions. lol, got u. anyway, steve can get fucked like for real he's just gonna fucking dip like that? he's just gonna fuck off for peggy and ruin her life? WE KNOW SHE FOUND A HUSBAND AND HAD KIDS AND WAS HAPPY. he fucked that right up. also, he shaved the beard so I have no sexual attraction to him, which really takes from the 'I'll forgive you because you're hot' thing. I don't know. I just don't like endgame steve.

conc; steve is ok. he's not the worst character but like he's far from the best and the ending suuuuucked.

#ops.

[writingdotcoffee]

#153: The Uncertainty of Being a Writer

This week's post was supposed to be about Writing Analytics, but I had to delay the launch by a week. Stay tuned for next week!

One of the hardest questions that writers face, particularly in the early days is: ‘Will this thing work?’

Will the hours that I pour into this endeavour pay off? Would I be better off doing something else?

What if you spend the next ten years writing books and short stories and trying to get them published. No major publishers pick them up so you decide to self-publish and only sell a handful of copies. What then?

Luck does play a part in success – from being incredibly lucky or awfully unlucky. You may do everything right, and it may still not happen.

It sucks thinking about things like that, but that’s what’s been on my mind lately. The uncertainty is real. It will get to you eventually, so why not deal with it early?

Writing your first book is a particularly uncertain business. For a long time, you're toiling away on your own. You have never done it before, and you have no idea whether what you're doing will be good.

When you're in the book-writing trenches, it's easy to fixate on the end goal. You're doing whatever it takes to get the book over the finish line – working nights and weekends, skipping pub with mates, abandoning hobbies.

I'll finish the book, and then it'll be all good, you think. But what if it isn't?

Tim Ferriss – a best-selling author and famous podcast host – has an exercise called fear setting. Years ago, he did a TED talk about it which blew up. The idea is to spend time with your fears. Imagine that what you fear the most does happen. What then?

Let's say you're 35. You look about 45 because, over the past 10 years, you've spent every free moment outside your job pursuing writing. You're always twitchy, particularly when around other people.

You can no longer log in to Instagram because all your friends have kids, big houses, flashy cars. You're nowhere near repaying your student loans.

You signed with an agent for the fourth full manuscript that you've completed, but no publisher would buy it. Now she's writing to you to terminate your contract in 30 days. Ouch.

So what can you do to prevent this from happening?

1. The Journey, Not the Destination

As cliché as that sounds, you should do whatever you can to enjoy the time when you're working on your book. The journey might be all that you get, what can you do to enjoy the ride?

Are you learning skills that you could apply elsewhere? Maybe you can connect with like-minded writers and start a writing group? Could switching genre make writing more enjoyable?

Write for fun, first and foremost.

2. Practice Healthy Detachment

Notice what happens when you go to an interview for a job that would be nice versus a job that you desperately need. The anxieties that we have shape our behaviours and performance. Worrying about being successful might just be what makes you miss the mark.

If you make wanting to be an author a part of your identity, it will be hard to deal with all the rejections that come along the way.

3. Don't Abandon Everything Else

Every once in a while, someone talks about how not having a plan B was what gave them the motivation to hustle. I don't buy it. It might have worked for them, but there are dozens, hundreds and thousands of others who also didn't have a plan B and failed, and exceptionally shitty times ensued.

Keep your friends. Keep your hobbies. Keep your job. You can always abandon them when you're rich later.

So do I think it's worth pursuing a career as a writer? Absolutely yes.

In an alternate universe, you're 35, married with kids, living in a modest house that you own. You've been writing for 10 years, and while no publisher ever bought your book, you've had a blast writing them.

Every Thursday night, you meet your writing group downtown. They're like your second family. Your jaw hurts from laughing every time when you come home.

Juggling your work, family and writing isn't easy, but you're not in a rush. You're working on a novella in a series that you've been publishing on your blog. The deal is that if it makes more than $100 in profit, you're buying drinks for everyone.

And in another universe, in a galaxy far, far away, you're on your way back home from a successful book tour that coincides with the release of a brand-new Netflix film which is an adaptation of your most famous novel. You're looking at the lights outside as the plane takes off. The PR round was exhausting. It's about time to start thinking about what will you write next...

Thanks for reading ❤️.

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Past Editions

#152: Working with Creative Constraints, July 2020

#151: My Favourite Writing Podcasts, July 2020

#150: The Business of Making Art, July 2020

#149: All That Matters Is What You Leave on the Page, July 2020

#148: Keeping a Victory Log, June 2020

#writing #writers #write #writing tips #writing advice #amwriting #writing life #writblr #personal update #update #me

[rottenprincessshura100]

Mephisto the big bad (notes)

Rambling thoughts....i drank a bunch of Quebec maple liquor.

These things happen. 

OK.

So, if Mephisto turns out to be the big bad. He’s probably going to need a new body. I’m convinced Shura might be that body. 

Mephisto is probably going to use Shura’s attachments to Rin and Yukio as leverage. Leverage to get Shura to a sign demon contract with him. Once that happens she belongs to Mephisto. Just like Shiro, that poor sod that came before her.

Shura’s a perfect vessel for Mephisto with a stong body and the ability to take on the powers of powerful demons, plus she has an empty demon sword that can be used as an additional horcrux for Mephisto. He’s already gifted her some sort of magical scabbard and put her in charge of his duties. So it’s already in the works.

But why else would Mephisto choose Shura?

Rin and Yukio could never hurt her.

If Mephisto possessed Shura the boys couldn’t bring themselves to destroy him. Yukio is secretly (or not so secretly) in love with Shura romantically and Rin treats her more like a big sister. A big sister he’s willing to fight to the death for.  

Mephisto wants to develop these complex emotions between Shura and the boys for his own protection. He’s not stupid.

I thought for the longest time he’s using love to save Rin and Yukio. Setting up situations to make Shura feel love for the boys so she will help protect them.  But what if his motivations are much, much darker.

Even though Meph is my favourite character, i’m fully believe him capable of a wide range of distasteful things. The Mephisto/Shura thing could end quite poorly.  What if he’s using love against her to protect himself and protect his legacy in Assiah.

Totally possible.

(CRACK THEORY)

Who shot Mephisto?

YUKIO DID?

Yukio knows all about the Kamakushi key, not only that but he’s trigger happy. When Yukio gets angry he shoots stuff. Maybe he shot Mephisto out of pure spite and out of revenge for everything he did to them. Mephisto fully expected Yukio to shoot him the first time, but somebody beat him to it.

But was it Yukio from the future?

 Mephisto is surprised, it hasn’t happened before. That being said....it was the shooter he intended. Just from a different timeline. 

Honestly Mephisto shouldn’t be surprised at all. He’s a bastard. Yukio probably felt a lot of gratification from making the shot.

SO WHAT ELSE MAKES MEPHISTO THE BIG BAD?

HE WILL DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO WIN.

Once he gets rid of Lucifer and Satan, he can rule over Assiah.

1) Mephisto knew Satan would show up in Assiah when he created section 13. Maybe not at first, but once it happened he had multiple opportunities to change the timeline and rid himself of Satan.

But Mephisto didn’t...

Instead he continued with the macabre and morally destitute experiments.  He needed a force stronger than himself to take out Lucifer. Satan showing up in Assiah was great timing. Satan was his trump card, Mephisto just needs to trick him. (he’s working on that side hustle.)  

On top of that, Mephisto created himself an army of clone exorcists (Shiro, Angel, Abel and probably Lightning). All of these creations are pawns in his game. He wouldn’t hesitate for a minute to sacrifice them. (Luckily Lightning is cunning and just as morally destitute as Mephisto. That might save his ass.)

(Plus, remember Yuri and Shemihaza? They give Lucifer and Satan shit for wanting to kill things in cold blood and choosing who lives and dies. Yet, Mephisto isn’t innocent either. The blood isn’t literally on his hands, but he’s still the ringmaster. He’s no better, honestly. I guess you could say he’s just trying to survive and defeat Lucifer for the greater good. That his sacrifices are justified....but still, Mephisto is capable of some seriously evil shit.

Other Shitty things Mephisto has done.

2) Mephisto manipulates Shiro, Yuri and Satan into some sort of love triangle to make Rin and Yukio. The failsafe to get rid of Satan when he was done with him. (I don’t know how it exactly went down...but I know he orchestrated it.)

3) Yuri had to go through that horrible birthing process to give birth to Rin and Yukio and then she died in the end. Yuri’s entire situation was tragic and horrible. 

4) Mephisto knew the blue night would happen and hundreds of people would be killed.

5) Mephisto got Rin and Yukio to free Shura from Hachiro’s curse, only to enslave her to himself. That’s so low. 

6) Mephisto adopted Izumo’s sister to takara corp’s CEO and she doesn’t remember her. 

7) Mephisto is the director of a religious school and gave Shima pornography. (Okay...this one does make me laugh.)

8) Mephisto tricked Shiro on more than one occasion. Like..doesn’t this woman look like him? If Meph decided to tranform into a hot woman...this would be her. 

#mephisto the big bad #blue exorcist #ane #mephisto pheles