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#my favorite shows and books and fics have ended with me smiling while sobbing bc it yes it Hurts but it was So Fucking Good
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i only just found your au and i need everyone to have a happy ending so badly im gonna cry ;-; sally is gonna be so freakin upset when she wakes up for real and sees she decimated barnaby.
oh, Barnaby already has his arm stitched back on when she wakes up! and really, even if he didn't, that'd be the Least of her worries. she wakes up into a Real nightmare - partially of her (unintentional) making
#happy endings... well... yes and no. depends on what act you look at#act one? no! actually things get So Much Worse in an entirely festive new way!#act two? eh! sorta! its more bittersweet than anything#act three and four blend into each other so much that three doesn't have an 'ending'#but the final act - act four... well. who's to say! im still workshopping what i want to happen#but i do know it's still gonna have at Least a bittersweet tinge to it#wh lights out au#rambles from the bog#there are consequences and not everyone Makes It. i dont like stories where everything wraps up perfectly fine#even if it hurts! i like it when things hurt in a good way. those stories where the ending is overall positive#but Enough Happened that its just... its an ache. looking at where someone used to be. you know?#my favorite shows and books and fics have ended with me smiling while sobbing bc it yes it Hurts but it was So Fucking Good#and while i wouldnt be able to handle rewatching/rereading due to Emotional Damage...#i think of them fondly and often and theyre Important to me#perfectly happy endings just rub me wrong. it always feels like there's something Missing despite it all being idyllic#i cant let my own stories - original or aus or whatever - have that kind of end#so if thats what people are hoping for! you've come to the wrong person and the wrong au!#i like to be kind but that rarely extends to my creative works!#i like it messy and painful and bittersweet and i like to be Ruthless with my creations with no compromise#sometimes characters need to fight. or leave. or die. or make serious mistakes. etc.#but anyway! anyway....#i will say that there isn't a happy ending for Everyone. and for others it's... complicated. again - bittersweet
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swtki · 3 years
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HP Boys: Surprise Pregnancy Head Cannons
Summary: The HP boys and their reaction to their s/o (afab) being pregnant when its not planned.
A/N: This takes place post Hogwarts so all characters are 18+, though no real smut happens in this so its not an 18+ fic.
WARNINGS: UNPLANNED PREGNANCY, MENTIONS OF PRO CHOICE OPINIONS, MENTIONS OF SEX IN LITE TERMS, SWEARING, FLUFF, MENTIONS OF ALCOHOL, ALSO THIS IS SUPER LONG SORRY LOL
Draco
So everything is going great for the happy couple, you two just moved into a flat together and are working normal jobs, drinking wine like adults.
And sure, Draco knows he wants to marry you, but he knows you’re not ready to settle down like that so he just plans and dreams.
Due to poor choices, when you’re late by two weeks, you know what it probably is.
Draco doesn’t even notice that you ran out to the store and came back and hid in the bathroom for 10 minutes. CEO of minding his own business ig
You just kinda...walk up to him and hand him all 3 tests while your eyes fill with tears because what if he demands you get an abortion?
Or what if he fucks off to god knows where?
But instead he just looks at you with the most un-draco like smile. Like his face was soft and it looked like he could cry any moment.
“Oh my god,” He says, putting his hand on your belly, “I can be ready for this, but if you aren’t then we can you know...”
“No, I want it” then both of you rejoice bc yay baby!
Cut to 6 months later when your feet hurt so bad you have to lay down and watch while Draco fails to put a crib together.
He eventually gets it done tho.
And when the time comes, he’s built and arranged everything for your bundle of joy.
Harry
So you guys are probably already married, but with everything at the ministry going on, it makes Harry less than a family man.
You both agree that it’s probably better to wait so you can be home and yk...raise it.
Well smart man Harry forgets that to not have a kid you need to use protection.
So of course when your period is late you don’t think about it, until its four weeks late.
That night, you and Harry are laying in bed, and thats when you tell him.
“Harry..I’m late.”
“Late for what?” headass.
You: 😳😐
Him: 👁👁😲😲
He’s hesitant to say anything, because he knows its ultimitley up to you what happens with it until its out.
“I think I want to keep it...you know it wont remember much for the first year and a half so if things are stressful it will be okay and-“
“Love...Its going to be perfect”
Mf built the crib in like 45 minutes I swear.
And of course he forced you to keep up with your vitamins, pre natal care, and appointments.
Swear tho you’re about to kill him because cofFeE
But the way he holds your baby 🥺 its his most valued thing ever now.
Ron
Ron is iffy on the kid thing sometimes.
He does want them, but only later when you guys have lived and travled.
So no, you two haven’t planned nor is it even in the picture when your wedding roles around.
It’s in the early days of the marriage when you see his family at the burrow on the way back from the honeymoon.
And of course Molly knows
Because Weasleys are hyperfertile I swear.
She takes you into the kitchen and puts her hands on your arms, shes got that big Mrs.Weasley smile on too.
“I knew it!” She says and pulls you in for a hug, “How far dear??”
You’re just standing there like🧍🏻
“I can see it by the way you glow! Oh my you and my Ron must be so happy!” This woman doesn’t notice that you’re confused.
“Wait what? Mrs. Weasley what are you-?” Then you count the days, “Oh. Well I guess I just found out for myself”
Her face falls slightly, but then she tells you can make you a potion that will tell you if you are or not, stan.
The stupid potion turns green when you spit into it, so everything is confirmed.
That night, you and Ron are getting ready for bed in the guest room and you decide to tell him.
“Ron, sweetie. We need to talk.” He looks like he’s gonna start crying but sits next to you on the bed.
“Y/N...I know its scary but please, we just got married I don’t want to divorce quite just yet 🥺🥺”
“Ron I-“ you start smiling, “I’m pregnant you dufus.”
He just freezes, for a while. Not saying anything, he just looks at the wall with his mouth ajar.
So you get up and go to Ginny.
“Gin, I broke him.”
“Ew, I don’t want to know about how you and him”
“No, I told him that I’m pregnant.”
“Oh, yeah that would do it. Just I don’t know... Give him a minute?”
You give him several, getting a glass of water then heading back up to the room.
Ginny was right, he needed a minute.
“I don’t...I wasn’t...you were.?”
“You don’t have to stay, but I think we can do it. Plus, you would disapoint your mom if you left so...”
“Okay...we’ll do it. I’ll be the best damn Father you have ever seen.” He says, talking to your womb.
Well...he’s a father I’ll give him that.
Pro of having a Weasley baby: free crib thats already put together.
Even if it looks like a death trap.
“We’ll put some blankets over it don’t worry”
You know how some Dads hold their parters hand during the delivery? Yeah he got sick and was moral support from the outside.
To be fair, you weren’t screaming in pleasure by any means.
Scary. But beautiful.
He shows the kid to everyone, he might be more in love with the baby than he is with you.
Ron see’s the appeal of having kids now.
Neville
Moving in with your boyfriend is always fun, right up until you guys go at it so much you forget protection more than once.
You think about it, then move on with your day.
Until the doctor calls, then “oh fuck”
Romance Neville bf
“Why aren’t you having any wine? I thought it was your favorite?”
“I don’t think fetal alcohol syndrome is my favorite.” BRO HE SPAT
But he looks up with tears in his eyes, and runs over to you to grasp you in a hug.
“Oh my god! You’re pregnant! Oh my - We’re gonna be parents!! Oh my god we’re gonna be parents oh-“ Que you petting his hair till he’s calm again.
Lets be honest, this man probably swapped the herbology books for the parenting guides.
“Well I mean I’m just wondering if we should go with this color or this one”
“Nev, it doesn’t matter. Our baby will not care.”
“I read in my book that Infants actually can recognize mood in-“
He won’t let you do anything during your pregnancy.
Gotta love a man who cries because he loves you so much and you’re having his kid.
“I never had a father, what if I do it wrong? What if the baby hates me and runs away at seven?”
“We’ve got quite a lot of time before then.”
He was there during delivery, letting you crush his hand like a champ.
You can’t help but cry when you see him sleeping on the floor next to the crib, its so sweet.
Fred
You two most likely already had two kids, so you decided to wait a bit so your hands weren’t quite full.
Well...your body decided not to wait.
A test provides the two lines, another wild child.
The two toddlers already run around like thing one and thing two, only with red hair.
I think Fred would gladly make the family dinner, and wear an apron. He’d own it, as he should.
But mf gotta not drop the salad bowl when you tell him of the fetus inside you.
“Fred we are going to have a bee-ay-bee-why.”
Your five year old has just begun to spell 😐
He’s happy tho.
Like over the fuckin moon.
He buys the two kids big brother/sister shirts too 🥺🥺
He knows the drill pretty well, so he isn’t too worried about the future.
But its funny that he still freaks out about the crib and feeding chair since he gave it away, you know because you guys werent having another kid.
He packed a hospital bag and kept it in the trunk, counting down the days.
Hours of delivery (He just sat back and held your hand) only to end up with a room full of 7 Weasley family members.
Fred always said that 3 was his lucky number :)
George
You guys were taking it slow, no marriage until you both felt it was time. And certainly no children before that.
Well you know...things changed when the test was positive.
You slid it over on the table, tears pooling in your eyes. He was stunned and quiet, which made you burst out sobbing because you knew that neither of you planned on having a baby.
But to your surprise he starts to smile.
“I want whatever you want, I’m staying by your side no matter what.”
“I mean...would it really be so bad? A house, a kid, a dog?” He holds your hand as you think aloud.
You both give it a week to think it over and the virdict is to keep it.
Thats when he decides he has to marry you, asap because he loves you and will never let you go especially now.
He loves to gush about the carrier of his child, to him you are a godess.
He’s the Dad with a predestination complex.
“Y/N, I just see him being a star quiditch player”
“George, we don’t know if it’s a him.”
He rolls his eyes “Okay then I can see her being a star-“
He made Hermione take you out for a movie date so he could rearrange your bedroom, since you only had a single bedroom flat.
You come back to a new set up including a cot.
Damn pregnancy hormones make brain go 🥺😭😭
He freaks when your water breaks lol
ceo of driving like a maniac to the hospital.
He can’t hold your hand, he’s pacing back and forth, sweating and maybe crying though he’ll never admit to it.
You get the joy of watching him cuddle the baby while refusing to give your child to you.
“George I’d like to hold-“
“No, you need your sleep honey, don’t worry”
Hogging the child.
Cedric
Its no secret that Cedric wants a baby someday.
And he makes it clear your wedding will be spectacular too.
However, finding out you’re pregnant the week of your dream wedding was a shock.
A shock that made you bang your head into the wall because how could you be so stupid?? We had a plan??
So you decide to wait until after the wedding, that way it wont add onto the stress (happy stress) of the wedding.
Cedric keeps trying to fill your glass at the reception, to which you kindly refuse saying you want to remember the night entirely.
Yeah he’s like 🤨 mhm okay.
You can only pick at the dinner because ew salmon doesn’t sound like an option if you want to keep the contents of your stomach.
As everyone waves goodbye to the car, and you both set off into married life, he leans over.
“I may be out of my mind, but are you...?”
“Pregnant.” His face lights up, pulling you into a hug.
Finally, your car pulls up to a small cottage with lush garden scapes all around, putting a hand out, he walks you both from the car to the door.
“Ced, where are we?”
“Home.”
Somehow it was perfect with Cedric, even when it was rushed.
He loved talking to your womb, even if it was weird that he was talking about the babies future brothers and sisters.
“Cedric, slow down. We haven’t even had this one yet”
Basically he is father of the year before he’s a full father.
He’s there while you deliver, holding your hand and telling you how great you’re doing.
He doesn’t even complain when you insult him <3.
He updates you on everything.
If his eyes aren’t on that child, he’s either asleep or dead.
I think Cedric was meant to be a family man, because he loves everything about being one.
Taglist: @truly-insatiable @amourtentiaa @imdoingathingmom @annasdani @anchoeritic @mullthingsoverinthehotwater @cedricsyellowscarf @faeinorbit
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oppabimbab · 4 years
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sequel: did we make it right? | kim taehyung
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genre: heavy angst, tiny bit of smut, break up
starring: taehyung x reader
synopsis:  you broke up with him and the phase of moving on—you didn’t know it would be this hard. You wanted him here but somehow, it feels like letting go is the best and the only choice you had in your hands, isn’t it? or not?
words:  8,972 words
side note: so this sequel happened since yall cried bc of prev fics and many of you wanted the second part of that. here we go. sorry for the grammar errors and any kind of faulty. i tried my best to keep the plot as it was planned and i still think this isn’t my best edits yet but enjoy!
recommended songs: moon and back - alice kristiansen | run to you - lea michele
related: maybe, it wasn’t right | kim taehyung
**
You had no idea that moving on would be this hard. It has been almost 6 months since the relationship ended and these past 6 months—were never that easy. It was harder than everyone have told you about. They said it would be easy but not once you found yourself in a right state of mind. They said everything will be just fine but you still found yourself in the midst of grief. 6 months—You never knew that time flew this quick even though every day felt like nothing but misery to you.
Break up wouldn’t be easy. And you agreed. It was a torture.
There were some part of healing that you didn’t understand. It was weird and confusing. Some days, you find yourself laughing and smiling like you had the entire world in your hands. You ate well, get enough sleep and happy. And some days, you would stopped talking to anyone—not even your bestfriend Wendy and locked yourself up in that stuffy room. You woke up with swollen eyes and broken heart like the wound was still fresh and bleeding. It was heavy and difficult. It made you confused and clueless. It became more confusing when you couldn’t find any reasons to move on if everything reminded you of him.
You tried to avoid his favorite songs every time it came on the radio. You changed the channel if his favorite movies shown up on the screen. You even stopped looking at everything that remind you of him. You forced yourself even it was really hard not to curl on your bed and cry. They were all a torture.
Honestly, if you asked yourself, you would agree that it still hurts like hell. The pain was still there, reminding you every day how unwanted you were. The memories on that night kept pulling your skin and made it bleed—reminding you that he wasn’t yours from the very first start. It still torn you down and drained the energy that was barely there. You couldn’t remember how many times the ugly tears would fall down in a very random place.
You were having the casual night, watching some movies with Wendy then the next second, she was there—patting your back as you bawled your eyes out because you remembered him. You wanted him, here.
Let alone when you needed to take few minutes break from your work at the office just to spend some tears inside the toilet—thinking how cruel he was for making you like this. He was really cruel.
You wondered—how was he? Did he cried when you left? Did he go through those sleepless nights like you did? Perhaps, did he ever think of you when he heard your favorite songs? Was he in pain, just like you?
6 months have passed yet It was never that easy to forget him.
When nights fall, you would silently scrolled down to the old messages you have shared with him. Taehyung was a bad texter. He hated texting because he said he preferred to see you more than doing the dry text all day. Once, both of you got into argument because of how bad he was.
“Are you serious?” you frowned at him—crossing your arms while you stood there. You weren’t happy now and of course, he knew why.
“What?” he chuckled as he munched on his favorite snacks, watching his favorite movies. Probably confused as hell why were you acting like this at 11pm. You rolled your eyes.
“You said you would text me when you got home yesterday? But you didn’t?” you pouted—scrolling through the messages from yesterday before you looked back at him. He raised his eyebrows.
“I didn’t? I thought i did?” he grinned and just like that, he was really a bad texter.
“Baby!! I got worried for nothing. I thought you were kidnapped,” you thumped your feet softly on the ground—trying to protest at him like an annoying clingy girlfriend.
He let out a hearty laugh at you. His eyes disappeared when he laughed and weirdly, you loved that. You hid the smile that was slowly plastering your face.
“Who would want to kidnap me though?I’m big and huge, unlike you,” he scrunched his nose at you, probably amused at you and your sudden clingy self. Your eyes widen at him, almost choking at his choice of words. A small laugh escaped your mouth.
“Big? Are you really that big?” you mocked while squinting your eyes. Taehyung hated it when that tone came out from your mouth. He cocked his brows. A grin showed up on his lips.
“Don’t act like you don’t know. Or should I remind you?” he bit his lower lip before pulling you closer to him. You squealed when he made you sit on his lap when you supposed to be mad—making him giggled at your quirky squeal as he planted hundreds kisses on your jaw—stroking your hips softly. You couldn’t help but laughing.
“Hmmm. You smell so good. Did you change your shampoo?” he mumbled through the kiss. You slapped his shoulder and looked down at his hooded eyes. A happiness bloomed in your heart at the sight. Nothing fancy. Just his presence was enough. Crazy.
“So, you’re going to change the subject again like you did last time?”
“Yes,” he grinned. You groaned jokingly. Taehyung knew your weak spot and he never failed to use that. And you weren’t complaining either.
When the memories came up, you were left helpless and vulnerable again and again. You wished it never ended. You wished the memories shouldn’t be called memories because you wanted to feel it everyday.
There were a lot of them and every day, you would remember it like a diary. His pictures—he loved to send you those random pictures of him, his dog Yeontan and sometimes, those things that remind him of you. 2k pictures from him—you still kept them nicely inside your phone.
You would read those old messages from him without realising a trail of tears were streaming down in the corner of your eyes. You didn’t realise the same tears kept you company every night without fail. He was gorgeous. You missed his raspy laughter. The way he pinned his body against yours because you were cold. Those sleepy voice echoed through the room when he woke up next to you—begging you to stay with him for few more minutes.
And just like that, the entire night was spent with the silent cry from your mouth. It happened everyday and you didn’t know how to make this stop.
“I’m gonna fucking kill him. Fucking asshole,” Wendy groaned in frustrations while you were beside her—sobbing. The first few weeks of break up, you chose to keep quiet about it because you had no energy to tell anyone about this. And when you decided to tell her, of course, she was mad. As hell.
“If he still wants that girl so much, why the fuck did he date you for 1 fucking year? Are you kidding me? Did you look like a joke? Oh god,” her eyes were gleaming with fire as she couldn’t hide the anger in her voice. The scrambled egg was left cold because she lost her appetite already. That morning felt intense and gloomy than ever. Wendy was a very straight forward woman. Even you were here sobbing like a crazy woman, she cursed the fuck out whenever she pissed off.
You shrugged, wiping your eyes with the tissues.
“Maybe if I was enough-“
“Enough? For god sake, you are more than enough. You gave everything you had, what else did he want?” her voice soften when she noticed your flushed face. As she came closer, she pulled you into her tiny embrace. Again, you broke down. You wished she was right. You wished you had given everything.
“Babe, you are the kindest person I have ever met in my entire life. You are beautiful, gentle and selfless. I’m so sorry you had to go through this. You don’t deserve this,” her voice broke a little when she heard you crying. She was a very sensitive person because the next second, you heard her tiny sob. You hope somebody could feel what was inside your heart now.
“I don’t know. I really don’t know, Wendy. I’m really sad,” she rubbed your back softly as you forced yourself to talk. It felt like a huge chunk just got stucked in your throat. You couldn’t talk.
“Please take your time. It will be okay. It should be okay, I promise you,” she whispered.
Months have passed. Will it be okay?
You leaned against the leather seat as you finished the last document for the day. It was a long day yet you be able to survive it even in such state. You gave a soft pat on your shoulder before gathering all the paper works to give to your boss before you leave. It was already Friday. Time flew quicker than you imagined.
Switching off the computer and grabbing your stuffs, you counted the steps to the huge room, few metres from your desk before you knocked on the door. A soft hum was heard few seconds later and you entered it.
“Good evening, sir. Here is the edited financial reports that you’ve requested before. I’ve made a few edits and please let me know if there is more faulty,” you cracked a soft smile across your lips as you put the plastic file on the table. You tried to sound professional as much as you could do even in this messy state of mind. You glanced at the young man—standing at the book shelf.
“Good work, thank you,” he nodded. A soft smile appeared on his lips as he looked at you. You returned the same thing to him while you stood there, at the edge of the his desk.
“If that’s all, I’m leaving first, sir. Thank you for today,” you bowed politely before you turned your heels. Few steps ahead and he called you again. You looked back at him and this time, he was already leaning against the desk, crossing his arms on the chest—staring at you with frowned brows.
“Can I ask you something? I hope it’s not something personal to you,” Mingyu voiced out—looking straight into your tired and confused eyes. You sure everyone could see how tired you were because you didn’t plan to hide it either. It drained your energy to fake anything now.
“Sure. What’s it, sir?”
“Are you okay?” his voice soften along with his eyes—gazing at you like a melted honey. The tension frown disappeared from his face and it was replaced by a worried gaze. You were a little surprised at his question especially when he looked at you like he knew something was bothering you. It looked like he knew something was wrong with you.
Mingyu has been always that kind of person and you were fully aware about that. The relationship you shared with him was fully business and you barely talked to each other once the office hours ended but sometimes, it felt more than that.
The way he guided you during your first few months as his clumsy secretary, the way he spoke to you even you screwed up too many times, the way he handled those mistakes caused by you—you knew Mingyu was a very gentle person. Rather than making himself as that cold and egoistic boss, he made sure that you could look up to him every time you were in need. Even so, you didn’t want to see his kindness as something that involved love like everyone claimed—deep inside, he treated everyone just as nice as he treated you.
He was a gentleman—with maturity. For real, you couldn’t ask anything more than that because that was enough.
You finally get it why Taehyung disliked him. You flinched slightly, trying to get him off your mind.
“Yes. Of course I am,” you faked a laughter even his eyes were striking into yours, completely unconvinced with your lies. He exhaled, silent for few seconds.
“You’ve lost your focus these past few months. I don’t know, you did your job perfectly but something is off. Are you okay? Is there something bothering you?” His voice has soften a bit—he probably noticed the changes on your face which was something you wanted to hide.
“I’m really sorry, sir. I will do it better next time,” honestly, you had no idea what exactly should you reply to that? Were you okay? Were you good? Definitely not. He shook his head, still unconvinced.
“That’s not answering my question,”
“Uhm,” you hesitated. Your lips turned into thin line.
“Actually, there are few things that have been bothering me but they are minors. I’m completely fine....yes, everything is just fine. Maybe it’s me being easily tired but really, i’m good. Don’t worry, sir,” you tried to sound convincing to someone that observant like Mingyu. He was really sensitive to little changes. You didn’t know he noticed those changes in yourself more than you did.
“If you need days off, please ask me for that. I don’t want you to overwork yourself too much. You’re important,” he looked serious without any hint of smile on his face as his eyes never left yours. His eyes were so intense and you wonder, why was that? Mingyu had such beautiful pair of deep eyes and you couldn’t deny that.
When he noticed a small smile crept on your lips, he spoke again.
“....as my secretary. You’re important to this company,” he corrected himself while adjusting his throat—his eyes immediately left yours as you still stared at him with a small smile. You chuckled—looking down to your feet. He was oddly cute for some reason.
“I know, sir. I appreciate that. But, i’m really fine. I still can go to work tomorrow. I can stay overtime if you want me to,” you smiled at him sincerely—showing off the beautiful smile you barely shown to anyone these past few months. But, this time, you find yourself loosened up for something very weird.
A small raspy giggle left his mouth as he shook his head. Mingyu got off from the edge of the table before he came to the desk to clean up the papers and stuff. You supposed, he was about to leave so you waited for him to finish.
“That’s good to hear. I’d like my best worker back....Alright, that’s all for today, You can leave now,” he flashed you another soft smile. You bowed politely.
When you thought it finally came to end, he called you again. This time—he came closer to you, towering your petite figure under his built. His scent—sweat and cologne filled up your sense, making you looked up at him.
“Are you hungry?”
“Yeah, kind of,”
“Great. Dinner’s on me tonight,” he grinned before he left you alone in the empty room—completely speechless at his sudden gesture. That was quick and random.
“But, sir I-,”
“You can’t say no to your boss, can you?” his voice echoed through the office as he already few steps ahead from you. That was it. You couldn’t say no to your boss, could you?
For few moment, you felt comfort. A sincere one.
**
The whole ride was filled with soft music from his radio along with the soft breeze, coming from outside. None of you both started any conversation since 10 minutes ago. It wasn’t awkward or uncomfortable but it felt more like both of you were enjoying this silence.
“Do you have any plan tonight? I mean...you know, it’s Friday,” when you were too immersed in such silence, he spoke out—bringing you back to the reality after been lost in your own thoughts. God knows how many time you have spaced out like this. You despised this side of you.
“Uhm, no honestly. I’m planning to eat then sleep until next morning,” you replied while letting out a faded chuckle. The next second, you immediately realised how pathetic that sounded like. Mingyu must be thinking that you were such an anti social and depressed bitch. But, you has always been like this since forever.
He giggled while nodding.
“I don’t know why but I kinda knew you would say that. That sounds very of you,” his deep husky voice filled up the car space along with the small laughter coming out from his mouth. You glanced at him, hiding a smile. You weren’t sure if he already recognised your traits for these past 2 years of working together but for some reason, it was kinda cute that he noticed the littlest thing about you.
“You can’t stop me,sir” you replied, almost chuckling with him.
“Can you do me a favor? Drop the honorific when the office hours ended. I think it’s better that way, it’s not like we are discussing about that annoying client we hated the most though,” he said in a very straight voice.
Without you realised, the car was filled with your laughter when you couldn’t hold yourself from laughing at his remarks. That was the most random shit you have ever heard from him. Mingyu looked surprise but a soft chuckle left his mouth.
“I can’t believe you said that. You hate her too? I thought it’s only me who hated her for no reason,” it was hard for you to utter the words as you were still laughing—covering your mouth with the back of your hand. He nodded with a grin across his lips.
When you have calmed down, he spoke again.
“Can you do that?” he met your eyes. Curling your lips, you nodded.
“I’ll try, Mingyu,” you hid a smile. His small dimple appeared right away—eyebrows raised.
“Without doubt, huh?” he teased. Again, the car was filled with nothing but his small chuckle and your soft smile.
The weird thing is, you felt a warmth for the first time from someone you had the least expectations from.
When both of you arrived at the restaurant, it was packed and crowded—completely something that you hated the most. The last time you went to such place was few weeks ago, thanks to Wendy’s pushy ass.
Both you and Mingyu came inside—finding a table to grab a dinner and go. But, it seemed like it wouldn’t happen because when you looked around, you found that eyes again. Out of those stranger eyes, you would still find that eyes again. Eyes that you have lost.
You saw his boxy smile—twinkling like it always does while his eyes—gleaming with the same sparkle. They were beautiful and painfully gorgeous that you almost forgot everything around you. Again, the universe seemed it was fading away from you.
But, he wasn’t alone. She was there—with him. The woman whom you wished you wouldn’t be seeing again—sharing the same smile and laughter—with him. Those gazes, you sure, they were filled with love.
The wound inside your chest, it was ripped open again.
**
Everything about this was tiring. Your body was tired. Your mental was tired. Your soul—it died. You tried to comprehend and see the good things from this stage of your life but why did it seem like nothing would work out? Why were you still here, alone with the same wound again?
It was unfair. Why was it only you, who suffered the pain of this break up? Why did it look like none of these things affect him as much as it did to you? Why did your heart still ache so much like this even 6 months have passed? There were so many questions that held you like a knife—stabbing you for the same reason again and again.
The same warm tears fell down—wetting your face for millionth times as you found yourself to be sitting on the bench at a park, not to far from the restaurant. The people seemed to be freaked out since you were there—sobbing silently like a weak bitch even you have told yourself to stop being this weak. Nothing worked out. None of them.
Honestly, you hated this. There were so many changes in yourself and you hated that.
“I found you,” the familiar voice echoed through the cold space before you looked up at your side with tears streaming down to your chin.
There was Mingyu—breathless as he tried to catch some breath from running too much. He must be running around to find you since you left the restaurant in just blink of eyes. Silence filled the gap between you and him while he stared at you and your pathetic self. It was embarassing and you wanted to disappear.
He heaved a soft sigh before slowly making the gap disappeared as he sat next to you.
“So, I believe, that thing, it bothered you these past few weeks? Your boyfriend?” he spoke and from the corner of your eyes, you could feel his gaze glued at you. With these swollen eyes and state, how the hell could you look at him?
“Ex boyfriend,” you replied. He nodded.
“I understand,” he exhaled, taking his eyes off you and looked around as if he let you to calm yourself down from the tragic sobbing. He probably noticed that you wanted to hide yourself from him so he looked away, letting both of you immersed in a night silence.
“It is hard and complicated,” without you realised, you spoke out in such a defeated voice. It was still vulnerable. And Mingyu finally saw that side of you.
He curled his lips.
“Break up will always be difficult. Don’t believe it when they say it’s not,” he met your teary eyes. His gaze was soft and dreamy. He probably saw all the pain in them that he chose to keep staring at you.
“I don’t want to let him go. I don’t want to forget him. Not yet. Not forever. It’s crazy,” you wiped the remaining tears in the corner of your eyes using the back of your hands as you looked down to the ground.
“Do you still love him?” he spoke as he looked straight to the busy streets across the park. You nodded as the remaining tears stained your cheeks. After all these while, you didn’t care anymore. You didn’t care if he find you weird—crying over someone like this even in fact, you shouldn’t have anymore.
“Aren’t you hurted? By still holding on to the past?” Mingyu cocked his head at you. His brown orbs were shining under such dim street lights above both of you. They were blinking like a pearl, something you have never seen it before. Rather than looking disgusted or uncomfortable, you could see a hint of reassurance in them eyes.
“It hurts so bad, Mingyu,” your voice cracked as you felt his gaze seemed never left yours before he exhaled. He looked up to the sky and sighed again.
“You know, there is a thing that I strongly disagree since forever. They said love is about timing, where you found your soul mate at the right time and be happy, also at the right time....” he stopped. There was a short silence.
Then he filled the air with his voice again.
“....but I believe, love is about what has been written for you,” a faded smile appeared again.
“It will always be difficult to get over someone.... whom you thought would be here with you for the rest of your life,” he added.
“...but you know, love isn’t about staying until the end. It’s not always about holding on from the beginning. Sometimes....it’s about letting go even it’s going to break every parts of you,”
When both of you found each other’s eyes—you could feel your heart clenched so much that it suffocated you to the edge. You felt every pieces of you were scattered all over the place again because deep inside, you knew it was true. You wanted to deny but It was painfully true. Fuck this.
“No, please,” curling yourself, you sobbed into your hands. Everything about this was hard. You weren’t ready. The next second, you felt his warmth beside you as he scooted closer. The same cologne filled your sense before he whispered.
“Can I hug you? To ease the pain even a little?” you weren’t supposed to hug your own boss but weird thing, you found yourself nodding at him. Probably, begging for some comfort that been slowly losing from your system. And, Just like that, you were so deep in his embrace—in an embrace that wasn’t Taehyung’s.
Part of you was so in pain. You wished it was him, hugging you this way. You wished it was him—comforting you this way because world knows, everything will be just fine. But, he wasn’t here anymore and you weren’t sure how to get used to that.
You pulled Mingyu closer to you and sobbed on his chest—like you did to yourself every nights. He wrapped his arms around you, securing you like he never wanted you to fall apart like this. It felt like he knew how painful it was so he was there, to put the scattered pieces, back as a whole.
It was weird. You knew there was a goodbye few months ago when you chose to leave but now, why did it feel like everything was finally over? It felt like you have lost that 1 chance and hope—leaving you this helpless.
“Let the grief go and set him free. You deserve to be happy. Genuinely happy,” he whispered—pulling you closer.
You sobbed. He was your happiness but it seemed like you need to replace it with a new one.
**
Another 2 months have passed. Nothing has changed drastically in your life except the fact that Mingyu has become a new part of your life. You couldn’t believe that night would be the night where both of you went deeper than you had before. He wasn’t yours and you weren’t his but the relationship has changed especially when he helped you moving on. Mingyu knew how and when to be gentle whenever you were around. It looked like he studied every little about your traits and tried to get along with it without disrespecting you in some kind of way.
You appreciate his presence so much. His presence was new yet comfortable—that you were still trying to get adjusted to it even sometimes, you got confused and lost. The weird part—Mingyu was the opposite side of Taehyung.
He loved to cook whenever he had the chance to do so and surprisingly, was good at it. He was huge fan of romance and melancholy genre—you still remembered when he kept you company, watching the same cliche kdramas without whining and complaining about how sucks the genre is.
He loved the smell of pastry—he loved the beauty of the evening sky—he loved the sound of the ocean. Those things that you barely heard from your ex. Indeed, there were new.
Some days, it felt perfect. Almost perfect. The heart break was slowly taken away from you and your days started to fill with laughter and smile. The heaviness in your heart got lifted for a moment, leaving you with nothing but a temporary happiness. It was genuine, all because of him. And you didn’t plan to push him away because there was some part of you, longing for his presence but you had no idea on what reason.
“Are you serious?” your eyes got widen as your gaze was glued on his face that had grin all over it. He curled his lips and nodded before taking the usual monthly reports from you.
The dried saliva in your throat was swallowed forcefully—making him chuckled.
“You’re asking me to go to a party with you? I supposed it isn’t a good idea, sir,” you kept the professionalism as both of you were still in the office—the boss and the worker but you couldn’t hide the tone that coming out along with the words. He shrugged.
“I couldn’t attend it last year and I don’t plan to do that again. And also, I don’t plan to go there by myself either,” he sounded very casual and straight forward—completely ignoring your widen eyes. A slight hum from you filled the space.
“That sounds sad,” you scoffed jokingly before you took back the signed report from him. His small dimple appeared.
“I guess that’s a yes? Great, you sure know what’s the best,”
“Hey, I didn’t say anything,”
“Okay, are you coming with me?” he crossed his arms—showing off his veiny arms while raising the eyebrows at you. For some reason, your heart thumped at the sight because he sure looked hot. You adjusted your throat as you looked back at him.
“I’m coming,” you said, almost rolling your eyes because he definitely knew you were going to say yes—as you witnessed a small satisfied smile plastered on his lips. He looked fierce yet soft, you don’t understand.
“Great. I’m going to pick you up tomorrow, at 8. Are we good?”
“We good, sir,” you scrunched your nose at him before you excused yourself to leave. He gave you a thumbs up as you left
You weren’t sure if he made you come as his secretary or something more than that.
**
You couldn’t help the nervous sweat that have been wetting your hands when you saw how huge the party is. Now, you weren’t sure if the basic black dress that been wrapping your curvy figure was a good choice since everyone looked damn good. Is this make up okay? This hair?
“Mingyu, I feel uncomfortable,” you leaned closer to his side while whispering to his ear, as both of you walked inside the bar. Of course it was crowded with so many people that seemed to be his friends because each seconds, his name was called.
“Just stay with me, you’ll get used to this,” he whispered softly before you could feel his warm hand sealing yours as he guided you through the crowd. There wasn’t any response from you as you let him take you to anywhere he liked while he introduced you to anyone he bumped to. He wanted you to be by his side so bad because swear to god, his hand felt like glue—it was sealed perfectly inside yours.
“Now, let’s meet my friend. He’s over there,” Mingyu said with a grin to you as he took you to the corner—making your heels clank on the marble floor. Every steps felt like fire because your heart thumped for no reason. They were beating so hard that it made you anxious for nothing.
When you finally reached the table, a gush of air left your lungs immediately when you saw him. Again.
It made you freeze on the ground—making you stood there like a statue as you felt all of the gazes were glued on you. You didn’t give any damn about anyone at the table because the only matters right now was his gaze—it felt like a fire on your body. You met his eyes again after the last time it broke you. He looked surprise to see you here, standing across him, in someone’s hand. Perhaps, he thought you were so in love and happy with someone new. Your heart thumped at the sight before you looked away.
“Thanks for inviting us, bro, it’s been a long time since I met you. Oh and this is my date for tonight,” Mingyu spoke as a proud grin plastered all over his face—greeting those people at the table without noticing you were completely out of zone. Wooshik greeted him back before he averted his attention at you.
“You look good like you always do. I’m glad you come,” he smiled—making you return the same thing. Of course he knew you. He was around when you dated Taehyung. Wooshik witnessed your journey with him until it ended. You glanced at Seojun and Hyungsik, who were also flashing you a soft smile. Those guys, it felt weird to see them after the break up.
“Thank you, Wooshik. The party is great,” clenching into your small pouch, you scooted closer to Mingyu, tugging his arms around yours—completely ignoring Taehyung’s eyes on you even it almost made your legs become wobbly and shit. Mingyu smiled at your gesture because he knew what was inside your mind. Without any doubt, he took your hands inside his. The atmosphere changed. There was a short silence.
“Enjoy the party, you two. Let me know if you need something,” Wooshik spoke—there were changes in his face, he probably finds it weird that you were now in someone else’s arms instead of his friend. You were sure everyone finds it’s weird that both you and him were no longer together in just blink of eyes even yesterday the world saw how deep the love was. It was indeed weird because the next thing you realised, you were in different home.
Every sips of alcohol that glided into your throat felt like nothing but a poison. The crowded place were damn noisy and full of emotions but you were here at the corner with the emptiest heart instead of having fun—like Mingyu have always told you. You should be having fun tonight but it seemed like nothing ever worked out on you.
It’s crazy that both of you were in a same place but the distance felt way too significant. He was over, probably happy and in love. You were over here with your empty heart.
Somehow, you hated him so much. Why would he always come up whenever you were at your peak—building yourself back? Why would those images of them two slapped you—shoving the damn thorns and blood to your heart whenever you were trying to be fine?
“Are you okay?” you flinched a little when the warm whisper touched your ears before you find Mingyu, by your side. Every time you looked at him, you couldn’t help but feel bad. How the hell could he still keep up with your sudden mood swings and bullshits like this? The weird part, he always treated at you like the whole world belonged to you.
“Yeah. I’m good,” you replied—forcing a smile. It was very artificial. He curled his lips as he stared into your eyes without saying anything. Both of you exchanged such an intense eye contacts for few moments before he took your hand—gesturing you to dance with him. You were left in hesitation but just like always, you would say yes.
His hand, you let them sealed with yours. The next second, you realised that he took you to the center of the bar before the warmth from his arms wrapped around your waist as he pulled you closer to his body. Your whole body froze when his deep eyes strike into yours when you looked up. Mingyu was tall that your petite figure almost got disappeared inside his embrace.
“Put your hands on my chest,” he whispered down at you—making you slowly do as what he told you. You weren’t sure if everyone was looking at both of you but the thing is, your skin—it tingled.
“Have I told you that you look beautiful today?” after such silence, he spoke again.
Chills running down your spine when he added.
“You look amazing in this dress. I think I’m falling in love,”
When he said that,it felt like there was a huge chunks in your throat because you barely can breathe when your sense came back. The courage to look at him was gone immediately when you finally understand what he just said.
“Mingyu...” you whispered—trying to make this conversation as clear as possible. He needed to repeat himself because you were afraid that you might be wrong even you heard him crystal clear. His hands slid behind your back to pull you closer—making your face was few inches away from him.
“Please...let me love you,” he said.
“Mingyu, what are you saying?” you whispered back at him.
“I know, I know. This is too sudden for you but please....let me love you. Let me heal you,” he looked down, breaking the eye contact from you. There was a desperation in those eyes, leaving you without words. He sounded needy and desperate. After all these while, you never know he was in love with you. You had no idea, not even once.
“How can we do this? We barely know each other. I’m scared,” you spoke to him—finding his eyes again. The more you stared at him, the more it made you confused you—how couldn’t you see that before? They were obvious.
“We can make this work, I promise you. We can do this. Gosh, I love you so much,”
A small smile appeared on his lips. Mingyu was one gorgeous man. He spoke with his eyes and heart.
Silence filled the gap.
“Can I kiss you?”
You wanted to say no but the next second, you found yourself nodding at him. You wanted to get off from his arms but you let him touch you even deep inside, your heart felt heavy.
The next second, you felt his lips against yours. They were sealed perfectly, spreading his warmth against your trembling lips. Mingyu secured his arms on your back when he noticed you were stumbling on your feet as the kiss deepen. His lips felt nice but why were your heart still empty? Why didn’t you feel any emotions in your heart when he kissed you like this? The worst part—why did you still have Taehyung’s image in your mind even after all these while?
The kiss lasted for few seconds before Both of you pulled away from each other and panted hard. You looked down to your feet—catching some air and a piece of reality. Time has froze around you, you couldn’t really process anything about this yet.
“Don’t touch her,” before you could get back to your sense, you felt a tight grip around your arms—pulling you away from Mingyu.
There was Taehyung, standing so close here as he glared at him with so much fire in his deep eyes. His eyes were already that deep but with fire, they were really intimidating. His jaw clenched a lot, his body tensed up with anger. Your eyes widen at him. Why was he here?
“Don’t fucking touch her again,” he grunted like a tiger before taking your hand and took you away from the place. There was nothing come out from your mouth as you followed him to anywhere he wanted to bring you.
You shouldn’t do that but you did.
**
“Let me go!!! What the hell are you doing?” you screamed at him when you were stumbling on the ground—almost hurting your feet. Few more steps, he let you go.
“What are you doing with him?” Taehyung grunted under his breath—his chest pound like he was holding such anger. You frowned at him.
“Why do you care so much? Let me go,” you spat as you tried to push him away but unlucky you, he was way much stronger
“Why are you kissing him? Why did you let him touched you?!” his jaw clenched a lot as he found your eyes even in such dark alley. You used to see sparkle in them but this time, it was a fire and you had no idea why would he act this way when everything was over now?
“It’s none of your business, Taehyung! Everything that happen in my life, you don’t need to know. Go kiss your girlfriend and leave me alone,” you yelled even your legs almost turn wobbly because of his fiery eyes. The words felt like thorns in your mouth and his presence still affected you this much, he probably knew that.
He looked stunned.
“After all these while, why do you care so much about me? I thought you said you wanted her but why are you here, dragging me from him? Why?” the quiet alley was filled with your fiery voice between you and him.
“Look.....I know, I know...I’ve fucked everything about us. Everything we had. I get it why it you are this mad because....gosh, this is crazy,” he ran his fingers through his wavy hair while sighing to the cold air. He sounded so frustrated and guilty that it made you become more furious.
“Oh for god sake, please. I don’t want your sorry. Just never show up again, please. You don’t know how hard it is for me to erase you from my life. You hurted me, Taehyung...” you stopped for a while because fuck this, the same tears were pooling in your eyes again.
The painful memories showed up again.
“...You broke me so much. So please, leave me alone. I’m tired,” You weren’t sure if those words were true. You weren’t sure if you really wanted him to leave you alone.
You thought the conversation was over when there was barely any response from him but the next second, he pulled you and pinned you against the cold wall of the small alley—trapping you between his arms. A small whimper escaped your mouth at the cold contact while his face was only few inches away from you that you could his hot minty breath. Teary eyes to such deep pair of eyes. What a moment.
“I never wanted to hurt you like this,”
“You probably get sick of me already but for the remaining minutes, I wanted you to know that—every part of me, never wanted to bring so much pain to you, like this,” you caught his eyes even it was really dark. They have soften. There was no more anger and fire. Don’t know why but It made your heart clench even more.
“Are you still in love with me?” out of sudden, he asked you.
“Why does that matter now?” your voice faded.
“Say that you don’t love me anymore and I will let you go to him. Say that so I know.....when you go back home, there is no more piece of me that would hurt you like this,” his eyes tremble. Fear and pain. Tears pooled again in your eyes. The blood could stain your lips from bitting it too much.
When you couldn’t answer it, he spoke again.
“Push me away if that’s the answer,”
And just like that, he crashed his mouth against yours. The kiss was deep—deeper than the last time you had with him when you chose to let him go. His lips—that was 8 months ago since you got to taste it and they still have the same flavour. Sweet and addictive. Like a drug. Taehyung grunts in the kiss as deepen the kiss by pulling your face closer—savouring your mouth like he missed it.
You hated yourself. You knew you already had the answer for Mingyu’s question because the next thing you realised, you didn’t push Taehyung away. Instead, you kissed him back like tomorrow doesn’t exist.
**
“Ah!!” a sweet erotic moan escaped your mouth as he planted trail of kisses along your bare chest—sucking and biting into the flesh, leaving some marks on your body. His kisses were rushed yet it never stopped sending chills and tingles to every part of your skin.
He stopped kissing you as he pulled the wet panty from your hips—showing off the dripping liquid from the pussy. You moan to the air when the cold breeze touched your bare core that it immediately made you missed his warmth. He stared at you for few seconds before coming down to your wet entrance.
“Oh my god, Taehyung!” you screamed out loud as you felt his warm tongue all over the throbbing clit. He sucked on your clitoris while grunting and groaning which sent so much electricity to all over your body. Mouth opened, body arched—you called his name like it was the only thing in your mind. You lowered your gaze down at him while moaning, just to find his eyes—were looking straight into yours. Swear to god, you heart thumped a lot. You fisted into his hair—pulling him deeper.
When he thrusted his tongue inside your core, a gush of air left your lungs immediately, making you scream his name as he stared at you. That was hot and your pussy clenched for more. Taehyung kept licking, sucking, eating you out and you never know you have been missing this intimacy with him. He always make you feel good. This good.
A knot started to twirl in your lower abdomen whenever he thrusted his tongue into you with no mercy. It felt like heaven.
“I’m so close,” you cried out and not long after, you cummed—making him lick your juice all over your pussy without taking his eyes off you. That was really hot, you couldn’t contain the overwhelming cloud in your chest everytime you met his beautiful eyes.
Then, he got off from the bed to unbuckle the belt around his waist before undressed the pants from his body—leaving the huge bulge under the boxer to your sight. His cock was throbbing hard inside the fabric and when he pulled his boxer down, your pussy clenched for him. You wanted him to touch you again and do whatever he wanted to do with your body.
“Ride me,” he grunted before crawling back on the bed, sitting with his back on the headboard as he waited for you to climb on him. The veins along his neck and arms were making it’s hard for you to think straight. Your mouth felt dry.
Slowly, you crawled on top of him, sitting on his thigh as you placed your hands on his shoulder for support. Lips were bitten when you caught his eyes before you slowly placed his member on your entrace before sitting on them—burying it deep inside your tight and wet pussy. Taehyung groaned—staring at how deep he buried inside you while you were here with a breathy moan escaped from your mouth.
God, it felt so good. Your legs tremble at the sudden contact—making him secure his hands on your hips as you started to bounce and move your body on him. The pace was slow and intoxicating. He was really big and the fact that you needed to adjust to his size, you never knew it has been a while since he made love to you like this.
Squeezing your eyes, your chin was lifted to the air along with the scream and moan from your mouth. He grabbed onto your hips—making you move back and forth on his dick while groaning with you, so the room was filled with nothing else but the sound of skin slapping that got louder each time you buried himself in you. You’ve lost your mind, you couldn’t feel your legs anymore. Why did the pleasure feel much more stronger now when both of you were no longer together?
“Fuck. Oh fuck,” he grunted through gritted teeth, pulling you closer to deepen the thrusted. Chin up to the air, you cried his name out—digging your nails into his shoulder whenever he quicken the pace. His cock was slapping your weak spot over and over again. It drive you crazy.
“Taehyung....” you whined—the courage to look at him were suddenly gone as you felt your chest was somehow heavy.
When you realised that you be able to touch him again like this—you felt like you just woken up from such nightmare. You could feel his skin, his lips, his eyes against yours—after being so lost and alone. You’ve missed him so much but you had no idea it was this much. 
Your cheeks were stained again. As he kept thrusting inside you, you couldn’t help the heavy cloud in your chest—making your silently sob on his shoulder. He wanted to look at you but you didn’t want to so you kept your face buried on his shoulder. You have lost that courage to see his eyes at times like this.
“You always feel this good. I’ve missed you,” he whispered along with a faint grunt—making you moan out loud with tears falling down from your eyes. It was a weird combination. Moaning and screaming his name in every thrusts, both of you were reaching the climax.
Few more thrust, he cum inside you—filling every space of your core with his warm release as your body jerked and flinched at the contact. Your legs felt like a jelly that you almost fell from him but he grabbed your hips right away.
Both you and Taehyung were panting hard on each other’s body after such intense and quick sex. You weren’t sure what was that sex for? Was this a goodbye sex or make up sex?
There was only silence but then, it was replaced with your small sob. The tears kept falling down from your eyes and stained his shoulder as you buried your face on the crook of his neck. The emotions that lingers in your head were too much, you couldn’t put it into words.
“Why are you doing this to me?” you spoke. A chill ran down in your spine as he stroke your hair softly while giving a soft rub on your hips using the other hand.
“Why are you making me like this, Taehyung! Tell me, you jerk!” you almost yelled before you pulled from him and punched his chest with your little might—trying to let go this slight anger in your chest. You pushed, punched and slapped his chest while sobbing like a crazy woman. He stared at you without saying anything before you finally stopped and became vulnerable again.
“Why did you make me fall this deep even I know, I can’t have you,” your voice crack.
He was cruel. He made you cry and now, he made you break Mingyu’s heart when that guy had nothing but love for you. But, after all these while, why did you still pick him instead of Mingyu? Why did your heart still want him, like this?
“I’m so sorry for hurting you like this,” he whispered—pulling your hands that covered your face before crashing his mouth again. He sucked on your lips like there was no tomorrow—probably get to taste the salty water from your eyes. The kiss lasted only for few seconds before he pulled away.
“I....I never knew that I wanted you this much until you left. Everything...everything felt so fucking empty when you aren’t here. Fuck, what did I do to us?” he took your face inside his hands. His deep eyes were trembling so much.
“You love her,”
“I was confused,”
“Don’t get it twisted, Taehyung,”
He shook his head.
“It made me angry to see you with him. I saw you that night...at the restaurant. I shouldn’t be mad but I did. I know he loved you and it drives me insane.The thoughts of you being with him, god, it’s crazy because I hate it,”
He wiped off the water from your eyes as he took every part of your face into his eyes. God, you’ve missed this. You thought you have lost it completely.
“What do you want, Taehyung?” a faint voice left your mouth.
“You. I want you. I know...what I did to you was too much. I know and I’m not asking you to forgive me now. But, let me fix this. Let me fix the broken parts of you,” his voice strained so much that you actually could feel his pain. Just as much as you do.
Tears prick again.
“I’d still want you even you ended up choosing her instead of me. That shit hurted but I’d still want you”
He shook his head, denying you immediately.
“Nothing happened between me and her ever since you left. The relationship wasn’t there because I couldn’t do it and she agreed for us to just stay as friends. Nothing more than that. She was my first love, yes but no matter how we tried, I realised that, my feelings for her were completely gone when you left. I thought it was her but no, baby. It was you,”
“Believe me, just this once,” he begged.
Swear to god, your heart bloomed like a spring. A small smile finally appeared on your lips as you stared at him. He talked sincerely with his eyes and you could see that. Twinkling and sparkling.
“I love you. I love you so much,”
He spoke and it felt genuine. You knew Taehyung wouldn’t be saying those words without actually meant it. You couldn’t remember when the last time he said that to you but listening to it again after a while, you were on a cloud nine.
You chest were full. The heaviness was gone in a blink of eyes. You nodded at him while biting down your lips before you wrapped your arms around his neck—burying your face on them.
“What took you so long to reply?” you whined softly.
He chuckled.
“I’m so stupid for taking this long,” his husky voice filled you.
“You are so stupid,” you sob—tighten your arms around him as if you didn’t want to let it go. Not anymore. Silence filled the space as both of you got immersed in such deep thoughts for a while.
“I love you too, Taehyung. I always do,” after a while, you finally got to let him know that. The sincere feeling that has been longing in you ever since you met him. It was still here to this day. Crazy.
“Can I date you?” he asked after few minutes of silence and without any doubt, you said nodded. He said the same thing to you before and it happened again. It felt like both of you just got back to the day 1.
Where both of you were young, reckless and in love. Perfectly right.
**
PS: I think I wanna open a fanfic request box. You guys can give me a request (genre: angst, smut, fluff) and I’ll make it happen (slowly, no tension). Also, ask me anything. I’m always opened for talk. And, thank you for enjoying this fanfic and its sequel. love u
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likeadove · 6 years
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Anonymous said: just wanted to tell u that i finished wcpah on a train and the fic almost made me miss my stop it was THAT good had to run off the last second hahahahah
Anonymous said: holy fuck bethany you have no idea I'm so sad about this book ending bc for real its gotten me through a lot these past few months (been reading since chap 6 baby) and honestly my only source of happiness after this will be nest of salt. From the bottom of my heart thank you so much for everything youve doen with this story. Its magnificent. (and you wrote the smut wonderfully don't even worry)
Anonymous said: I just can’t. So good. I already want to start begging for one shots.
Anonymous said: That was fkn stupendous and I am so grateful to be able to read your stories <3
Anonymous said: I actually screamed when I saw the lyrics for this chapter. Thank God none of my roommates are home because the whole thing had a me screaming/sobbing. Like how did you manage to make that so beautiful? I cried? They love each other so much and you showed that in the way they did it.
Anonymous said: ben and rey crying after doing it is the most canon thing ever canoned
Anonymous said: I just wanted to let you know that the most recent chapter of WCPAH is amazingly beautiful. it made me sad because ive never had that good of sex lol. your writing was fantastic, everything felt so real and i think you waited until the perfect time in their story for this to happen. you did a fantastic job! Thanks for sharing it with us! :)
Anonymous said: that ending killed me oh my gosh. im smiling like an idiot
Anonymous said: I can't believe it's almost over. It's so amazing and I love it so much and I'm just so sad and happy and idk man. You've done it, like really done it, knocked it out of the park. I'm experiencing such a wide array of emotions and I seriously don't know what to do.
Anonymous said: Me right now: 😭😃😥😍😖🤯😵😏😱😫😘😞😁
Anonymous said: literally one of the most satisfying things i have ever read. you did it. you gone dun it. cannot remember why i wanted them to get down when she was 18 anymore haaa. This is oh so very right. All equal parts sexy, sweet, hot, beautiful. Thank you from the bottom of my reylo heart. what will i do without these two and your updates!!?! excuse me while i re read this chapter for the 4th time. because duhhhhhhhh
Anonymous said: lemme just say my thoughts on the last chapter- aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH im telling you now im gonna cry like a baby when WCPAH is over bc it's been such a wonderful ride and ive been around since chapter 1 was posted and i stumbled across the then baby fic and had never listened to the music Ben and rey do until recently and i found chapter 1 to be cute so i thought id stick around for chapter 2 totally unaware that almost 60 chapters later i myself not wanting it to end. Thank you for this❤
Anonymous said: literally cried when I saw you updated. woman you have done it. you wrote possibly the best smut/fan fiction these eyes have ever read. blown away from the way you lived up to hype for this sex scene- like surpassed my wildest expectations&gave us perfection. ben was so eager, aggressive&gentle all at the same time. we could count on rey to take matters into her own hands. girl knows what she wants. cannot wait for them to fill the house with their art, memories, milkshake machine, dogs&kiddos.
Anonymous said: So, it took me about half an hour to read through this chapter (56), because I had to stop to internally scream, or digest the fact that IT(!!) was finally happen like every two words. Words cannot describe the satisfaction that this chapter gave me. FUCKING FINALLY!!!!! You killed it, as per usual, and I am continuously in awe of your skill. I’m not ready for this to be over, but thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for letting us come along on this ride with you, and Ben and Rey. ❤️
Anonymous said: Idk if this is gonna sound really fucking lame to you, but your story gave me a reason to look forward to a new day, thank you for this! I am so glad i found your story, you had me at "90s grunge Ben Solo"
Anonymous said: First of all, I love you. Second of all, you are a master and a bloody wizard. Third, the last chapter from Ben's POV would make me die and go to heaven. I want to know his thoughts and feelings during *the scene*. Is that on the horizon? If not, that's ok - I'm happy with anything you give us! My brain keeps going over all the saucy details and starts fluttering when I think about what might come next. Sorry for being weird but I FEEL SO MANY EMOTIONS AND IT'S BECAUSE OF YOU.
Anonymous said: That was some pretty dope as shit smut Bethany like holy fuck
Anonymous said: that was literally the best sex scene I have ever read. so real and complex!! favorite fic of all time for sure
Anonymous said: your story came out on week two of my multi month bed-rest-ploza. i have been reading and healing along with these two ever since. thank you for the fluff, distraction, angst, music suggestions and companionship from your story and the world you created. this last update was everything i could have wanted and more. so sad that this story is wrapping up soon. excited to see where you take these two and reading more of your stories. <3
Anonymous said: I just wanna say that 'we could plant a house' was such an important story for me. It actually inspired me to write again IT WAS JUST THAT GOOD. I love you and I want to thank you for sharing this beautiful, heartbreaking fic with us what a fucking blessing honestly you're a goddess, never stop writing ❤️ And like yo when's the next update I'm dying
Anonymous said: Okay so I’ve been here from about the beginning and omg what am I going to do without this fic?! This is definitely my favourite reylo fic and what am I going to read once it’s gone?! I love it so much!!
You are all beautiful, wonderful people. Sometimes it overwhelms me (in a good way) when y’all say that this story helped you through a rough time or inspired you to write/do art again, because it’s so surreal that my silly fic I started in January to get out my Reylo angst and give me an excuse to listen to a lot of 90′s music could possibly have this effect on others. I’m so glad my work means this much to you guys, that you guys have continued to read despite how many times I came for your feels or made you cry. You guys mean the world to me; it’s been so lovely getting to go on this journey with you all. I honestly don’t know what I’m going to do once it’s finished. Be very depressed, I expect. We can all send each other virtual hugs and cookies <3
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artificialqueens · 7 years
Text
The less you know, the better ( TRIXYA ) CH2 - Asada Tycane
A/N : Hey guys! The first chapter sucked because well.. Nothing happens, really. But it was necessary to show the start of it all. I hope the rest will turn out better.  Again, this is a fic based on my past relationship/events during my life. Feel free to ask about it. Written out of my own point of view, but as Trixie.  ( As I would love to write smut for you all, I don’t really want to in this situation bc of the memories. I will in another fic that I plan on writing. ) Sometimes I change things up a bit to make it more trixya- like. Both cisgirls. I mostly replace names of other people with other queens, but some people in real life are too cruel and I don’t want to make a queen seem like that although it is fiction. So for those people I choose random names. This is a graphic chapter and the next chapters will be, too. I will mention the TW’s for each chapter but there will be a lot of them. Sorry, I guess. Also another apology for my horrible English. Xx Asada Tycane
Trigger warning : Self harm, self harm scars, insults/cursing, bullying, violence, body issues/eating disorder, anxiety & panic attacks, other mental illnesses.
After that warm Saturday in mid-july, Katya and I were together most of the times. I learned that she loved reading and what her favorite books were, so I borrowed one of them. I never had the time to finish it. After a week of being together all the time, Katya went on a holiday with her family for a week to Russia. She always went to Russia because her parents seemed to like it there, well, she didn’t. During that week I had a lot of time to think. I tried to keep myself busy with my makeup, but my thoughts always seemed to go back to Katya.
“Can I ask you something baby?”  Katya spoke those words softly, as if she was afraid that I would break.  I remember looking up from my phone, catching her staring at me and immediately looking away. “Yes, what’s wrong?” She played with the necklace that she got from her grandmother. As she spoke, our eyes met each other again like it was the first time. “How.. What happened to you?” I raised an eyebrow, pointing out that she had to be clearer. Katya pointed at my legs. I knew what she meant and sighed. “You really want to know?” She nodded.
Spring 2013
“You look disgusting!” All the kids laughed at the comment of a somewhat taller boy called Jeremy. I just walked into the classroom and it started again. “You know, you are really fucking ugly Trixie. I understand why you don’t have friends, who would want to hang out with a bitch like you? Whore!” I walked towards my place in class, trying not to cry but a single tear left my eye. Before I could even sit down, a boy whose name was Steven, pulled me down to the ground. He kicked me in my ribs and I couldn’t help but sob. The whole class stood in a circle around me, all of them laughing at my pathetic appearance. A girl who I used to be friends with just stood there, giggling with the other girls from my class and recorded it with her phone. “Leave me alone.” I tried to get up from the floor, but someone, I wish I knew who, punched me in my face and I fell down again. “Not such a big mouth you slut. You are so fucking fat and we all hate you. And those clothes, where the fuck did you get those?  The dumpster?” He ended with another punch in my face, but got interrupted by the teacher that came in.
That night I stood in front of the mirror in only my underwear. I looked at myself in pure disgust. They were probably right. I was ugly, gross and fat. The tears started to roll from my cheeks and I sat down on the cold, hard floor. I pinched at my belly and my thick thighs, wishing I could rip it off. That night, the only thing that brought relieve was pushing a finger down my throat and bringing a blade to my legs.
Katya looked away as I told her where the white lines on my body came from. She didn’t know how to react, I guess. After a while, she spoke.  “I’m sorry you had to go through that.. Are you clean now?” She walked towards her own bed so she could sit next to me. “I guess. I mean, it’s been a while and I feel better now, but sometimes I still feel like shit and some days the urge is still there.” The slightly older girl grabbed my hand and gave it a little squeeze. “ I understand babygirl. But I’m here now, okay? I won’ leave you and I won’t treat you like they did..” She shook her head. “Why did I bring this up? This is the last time I can see you before I leave for this stupid holiday, I don’t want to make you sad.” I smiled and pulled her closer to me so she could rest her head on my chest. “It’s okay baby.”
The buzz of my phone pulled me out of my thoughts. It was from Katya.
From : Baby <3
I’m bored here and I miss you. What are you doing?
To : Baby <3
I’m doing nothing, really. Just missing you. <3 How has it been so far?
From : Baby <3
Stupid. My family is fighting the entire time, my brother keeps on insulting me. You know, the usual.
To : Baby <3
I’m sorry.. 3 more days until you’re back home though!!
From : Baby <3
Yeah. Can’t wait.
Her brother, Matt, drove me insane. Every time I saw him he was rude, insulted Katya and made her feel like shit. Mentally and physically. It took her a while to open up about it, because Katya was really introverted and refused to let people in, but eventually she did. She told me about all the times that he called her a pig and that it made her feel fat, although she was as thin as a stick. She told me about him hitting her, about him terrorizing her and her little brother, Caleb. She told me about how her mother barely did a thing about the whole situation and her father even less. She told me that her mother said she couldn’t tell anyone about the things that happened in there.
As time passed, Katya and I became really close. Katya started smoking regularly, I hated it,  she knew that but didn’t care. We slept together all the time, at her place or at mine. At hers meant I would hear the fights, her brother yelling that he would kill the fucking dog or calling their mother useless. At mine meant peace, and Katya called my home her safe place. In September, school started again and I had a ‘relapse’. My panic attacks started again because of school. One morning, it was like I never made progress. My mother yelling at me “What is so bad about school? We fixed everything last year! There is no reason to have a panic attack now! You’re still going to school, I’m not going to let you stay at home AGAIN.” and Katya didn’t know what to do. “How did this start, Trixie?”
October 2015
I was afraid. Afraid of what? People, going outside of my own house, humiliation, just everything. Why? No idea. The fear took over my body, the negative thoughts screaming at me, it felt like everybody was laughing at me. One morning, I just couldn’t take it. My hands were shaking, I could barely walk, I was dizzy and I could barely walk, but worst of all : I could not breathe. It felt like I was dying. I was crying, hyperventilating and my mother was yelling at me. I couldn’t go to school, so I went to the doctor with my mom later that day. Staying at home was not really a great option, turned out later. The fear only became stronger and I couldn’t leave my house. The pressure of school made me feel horrible, the insults of other people was the only thing I could think about. I isolated myself for almost  half a year. I had to go to several therapists and if the waiting list hadn’t been that long, I would’ve ended up in a psychiatry. The first day of going back to school was in April 2016. It was horrible. The principal put me in the classroom with my other classmates while I was having a panic attack. But after that, things got better and I passed all of my classes although I barely showed up to class that year.
I looked up at Katya, afraid for her response. She didn’t say anything. My mom stormed out of the room, she was fed up with my bullshit. So I sat there, sobbing and trying to catch my breath with Katya sitting next to me holding my hand. A little while later Katya let go of my hand and put on her jacket while grabbing her car keys. “Wh-where are you going?” The words that left my mouth were shaky. “I have to go, otherwise I’ll be late. I’m sorry. Good luck today, just go to school. You can do this.” With a little peck on my lips, she left.
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