CDC finally fuckin' recommended the new COVID boosters for everyone in the US. letting my american followers who don't check the news know because i've been turned away for wanting to get an extra booster & now won't be anymore & it's Lovely. most americans are not going to get these and are going to grumble about them, which sucks as far as spread goes - but DOES mean u can schedule with ur local pharmacy sooner rather than later. please do so. ur immunocompromised friends and ur own body will thank u.
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A Persuasive Argument - dpxdc
"Great!" Danny says, clapping his hands together to get everyone's attention. The dinner table falls silent as everyone looks towards him. It's a full house today and, honestly, Danny's a little nervous. "I'm sure you're all wondering why I gathered you here today."
"It's dinnertime. In our house." Duke mutters, while doing a very bad job of concealing his yawn. He holds his fork poised over the braised beef, but, just like everyone else, still looks towards Danny before tucking in. It's intriguing enough to wait.
"Yeah, no one misses Alfie's dinner." Dick says, with a brilliant smile that Danny can't help but return.
"Precisely! What better time to talk to you all than when you're all actually here!"
"Wait, I thought you came round to work on our English essays?" Tim asks, blinking owlishly.
"I'm afraid I've lured you here under false pretences, Tim."
"This is where I live."
"I would still really appreciate help on that essay though, I mean, what the hell is Hamlet even about? I just don't get that old time-y language, like 'Hark! A ghost hath killed me!' - absolute rubbish, what does that even mean?"
"The ghost never kills anyone in Hamlet, he's there to tell Hamlet that he was murdered. Have you actually read it?"
"No, but it sounds like you have. Tim, I want this guy to help me with my essay instead. I know for a fact that you haven't read Hamlet, either."
"So? We don't need Jason, I've read the Sparknotes."
"Hi Jason, I'm Danny, pleasure to meet you, summarise Hamlet in three sentences or less."
"Am I auditioning to help you write your essays? I can't believe you’ve gone through your whole school life without reading it, it’s good!"
"Hamlet, along with a number of other classics, was banned in our house because it portrayed ghosts as intelligent and sympathetic beings rather than evil, animalistic beasts. I didn’t even get to see The Muppet's Christmas Carol until last year with Tim! It was surprisingly good, and I hate Christmas because everyone always argued and it sucked. But we're getting off topic. I—"
"No, no, please go back to that, because what the fu—"
"Boys, please." Bruce interrupts, looking to the world as if he wants to hang his head in his hands. "Danny, you were about to say something?"
"Oh, yeah, Mr. Wayne! Thanks!"
"Please, call me Bruce."
"Well, that very succinctly brings me to my point, because I'd actually really like to call you dad."
Nobody says a word. Nobody even blinks, all as shocked as the other, watching open-mouthed as Danny pulls his laptop out from beside his chair. Bruce can definitely feel a headache coming on.
"Before you say anything, I've prepared a 69 slide PowerPoint presentation on why you, Bruce Wayne, should adopt me, Danny Last-Name-Pending. Please save your questions, comments, and verdict until the end, thank you."
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"chilchuck isn't a twink, he's a DILF!" now i get why you're saying that but i feel like you've maybe forgotten what chilchuck tims canonically looks like
i'm sorry but this man is a twink. also DILF isn't a body type it's a status (and technically, an opinion) so he can be both
"but he's middle-aged!" look at him. look with your eyeballs. his age has nothing to do with the fact that he Looks Like That. he's a twink. the sooner you accept this the less angry his fandom will make you
edit bc this post has become the bane of my existence:
FAQ
Q: wtf do you mean he's a dad? he looks like a kid.
A: he is 29 years old, and a half-foot. half-foots are dungeon meshi's halflings, or hobbits, or whatever you want to call them.
Q: wait, if he's 29, why the fuck are you calling him middle-aged?
A: half-foots have an average lifespan of 50 years. chilchuck was originally drawn with grey hairs (you can see that in the manga fullbody) but the mangaka gave up on that over time. he's middle-aged for his race.
Q: hey, doesn't that look like a little angry face on his boot in the manga drawing?
A: yea kinda
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the batkids get Bruce some combination of horrifically drunk and high on Ivy’s pollen or something one night after a mission and they ask him the hottest question currently across all the leagues — how many JL members he’s slept with — thinking it’ll be something like two or three.
Bruce is facedown on the table and slowly puts up a hand. A full hand. Gasps around the room. The gasps turn into choking as the second slowly joins the first, slowly opening one by one like he had to count.
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so like. if anyone else, like me, still has the occasional fanfic they follow on fanfiction.net, and hasn't been getting the update emails for the longest time and was wondering if ti meant the site is on its last legs
no
no they've done something stupid as fuck
you have to opt back in to getting the emails/notifications of new chapters every six months, because they automatically assume you don't want to know when the fics you followed for the updates have updated
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Thinking rambly Thoughts about Athena and her genderfuckery and her relationships with Odysseus and Penelope.
Anyway I think it’d be neat if Athena functioned as both Odysseus’ wife and Penelope’s husband in each others absence (and also as a father to Telemachus). Not even necessarily in a romantic way, just a weirdly intimate but unknowable ThingTM they have going on with Athena
TFW your in a triad and one member is a virgin goddess whose definitely playing with you and your family’s lives like Barbie dolls
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Ok kinda funny/a bit angsty idea danny has a soulmate mark that shows how your soulmate is doing in the alive injured critical dead sense when the soulmate dies the mark goes black
Now Danny's mark has been through most/all the phases he was a bit worried about the dead part but they came back so he's not that worried
Danny's soulmate on the otherhand a batfam member is freaking the fuck out every single day his soulmate dies amd comes back to life what the hell if wrong with his soulmate that he can keep coming back to life
Basically when danny transforms to phantom his mark registers him as dead and the bat family are freaking out because one of their members soulmate has died like 63 times this week what the hell is up with him
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