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#longer the better
humhowellujah · 3 months
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i'm drunk off two lavender martinis what the fuck do you MEAN dan and phil went on a step by step recreation of their japan trip as a part of a HONEYMOON episode for their sims. be so fr rn be so serious please. dan howell you have 4 minutes to respond . phil, keep it up babygirl. lavender martini recipe in the tags
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mo-mode · 4 months
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AU where Mr. D claiming to be Percy’s dad accidentally counts as Claiming according to Greek god law or whatever and now all the other gods legitimacy believe Percy is his son, but if Mr. D corrects it, he has to explain to Zeus why he pretended he was Percy’s dad so now he’s like “YEP ol’ Perry Johansson is MY child wowie just look at the little fry, you have your mother’s eyes. Please stop standing next to water or you will blow my cover”
Meanwhile Poseidon is just standing off to the side like “how on earth did I dodge THAT bullet”
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greencarnation · 6 months
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"ukraine invasion" vs "israel-hamas war" hm. something something wording and western media bias and propaganda
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time-woods · 7 months
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formal company event ! yes im pullin out all the romcom tropes for this series
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canisalbus · 7 months
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What if I told you that RoobrickMarine went and wrote an entire novella starring my 16th century dog couple? It's very canon-adjacent, well researched and thoughtfully put together, has inspired me a ton during these past months and it's now publicly available at AO3. I highly recommend it.
✦ Separation ✦
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800cicada · 1 month
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peak genderswap
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caemidraws · 1 month
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Wheel of Fortune
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ruporas · 1 year
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good mornings throughout the travel
[ID: Two comics of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. The second is underneath the read more.
The first is in four panels and follows Vash and Wolfwood through hotel rooms. First, Vash and Wolfwood exit adjacent rooms, and Wolfwood has sparkles floating around him as he exclaims, “Rise and shine! Ready to go?” Vash frowns, displeased, and says, Urk— Good morning to you too.”
Next, they’re in a room with two beds. Wolfwood is awake and fully dressed. He’s sitting on the bed and smoking, back turned away from the viewer and he says, “Wake up already, sleepyhead.” Vash sits up with his eyes still closed and yawns before saying good morning. After that, they’re sharing a bed, and Wolfwood gets up and says, “Morning, sunshine. Time to get up.” His body shadows Vash from the sunlight. Vash is still lying down with a blanket draped over him as he mumbles good morning.
Finally, they’re embracing in bed, both shirtless. Sunlight shines on them, but their contact allows their shadows to drape over their faces. Vash smiles, kisses the top of Wolfwood’s head, and says, “Good morning, Wolfwood.” Wolfwood sleepily says, “Mph, g’morning, needle-noggin’,” snuggling into on Vash’s shoulder. End ID] ID CREDIT
TRIMAX Vol. 10 Spoilers under read more // bonus comic
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[ID: The bonus comic starts with Vash asleep in bed, fully clothed with his hair half-black. Someone says “Good morning,” and Vash says, “Morning, Wolf—w...” He trails off as Livio, holding a plate of food, stares with abject shock.
Livio says, “I’m sorry.” Vash, smiling but sweating, says, “No, it’s my bad...” Livio repeats, “I’m sorry.” Vash says, “Geez, stop apologizing,” and cuts off Livio’s “I—” with a “Good morning, Livio.” Livio quietly mumbles, “... Good morning...”
Vash sits up from the couch he was sleeping on and looks down, thinking, “... That’s right. I won’t wake up to you anymore... I have to get used to that...” End ID]
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royalarchivist · 5 months
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Over 6 years ago, Technoblade and Etoiles played together on United UHC. Although they never got to meet each other on the QSMP, it's nice to see that they already had some nice banter and a fun dynamic developing during the brief time they knew each other. Here are some highlights from the video where they played together!
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Subscribe to Technoblade! Technoblade's United UHC video
[ Part 1 || Part 2 || Subtitle Transcript ↓ ]
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Technoblade: Bonjour, mis amis! (Hello, my friends!) Oh god, we already have a zombie on us. No! It's targeting me 'cuz I have subs!
Etoiles: Excellent teammates.
Technoblade: Do trees spawn in these worlds?
Etoiles: [Laughing at a screenshot of Technoblade saying "deforestation has gotten pretty bad"]
Technoblade: It's gotten pretty bad, man. What is this?
Etoiles: B-bonjour.
Technoblade: Stop speakin' Chinese.
Etoiles: You're the best Skywars player, dude. That's why.
Technoblade: That doesn't mean much.
Technoblade: Oh my god, I found diamonds!
Etoiles: Oh, whoa.
Technoblade: Subscribe to Technoblade! I'm suddenly a UHC god.
Etoiles: Oh, I got diamonds too! :D
Technoblade: ...Wow, way to ruin my moment. Wow. Can I just have this one moment?
Etoiles: Yeah.
Technoblade: Does everything- does everything need to be a competition? First diamonds I've ever mined in Minecraft.
Etoiles: Let's redo it, Techno. Let's say I don't have diamonds. I don't have diamonds, you have-
Teammate: I found diamonds!
Technoblade: Oh my god.
Technoblade: I have seven diamonds! And I'm not saying that to one-up you, but- I mean I am, but I mean I'm- I'm also tellin' the truth.
Teammate: Nobody knows which one of you guys is the mole.
Technoblade: Yeah, that's gonna be very awkward.
Etoiles: Maybe Technoblade is already-
Technoblade: I'm right behind you.
Etoiles: Technoblade is already saying to his friend-
Technoblade: I'm already in the Mole chat, plannin' your death.
Etoiles: Like, I'm kind of scared of Technoblade, actually.
Technoblade: I'm not even good, why would you be scared of me?
Etoiles: Because you're the King of Bedwars.
Technoblade: Alright, ok, ok, so here's how it works- I get paid per episode, right? So I'm not gonna betray you on Episode 2.
Etoiles: [Laughs]
Technoblade: Now let me enchant.
Etoiles: I'm so bad at hearing sound because when I'm hearing lava-
Technoblade: Nah, it's 'cuz the sounds are in French, isn't it?
Etoiles: [Laughs] I'm gonna kill you, bro.
Technoblade: No!
Etoiles: [Laughs] I'm gonna kill you.
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neorhythm · 3 months
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*chanting* BOYS NIGHT!! BOYS NIGHT!!!
got the idea from this tweet.
i'll include the uncropped version under a read more. i spent way too much time on wallace's fluffy robe to not include it lol
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rebelfell · 4 months
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multiples.
eddie munson x fem!reader
“Multiple? Multiple what?”
cw: smut blurb about eddie making sure you arrive properly. ref to period pain, fingering, oral (m & f receiving)
2.7k 18+ MDNI
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Eddie has a problem.
No, no, no—not a problem. That makes it sound like there was some issue he had to resolve or a task he had to complete. This is more delicate than that. A conundrum, maybe? A dilemma? Whatever he called it, it had consumed him for weeks now. And it boiled down to one thing:
He was pretty sure you weren’t coming.
At first, it was difficult to put a finger on what exactly was throwing him off. 
When the two of you got together, he was thrilled. Like, running through the streets naked, jumping on top of moving cars, Wilhelm screaming, over the goddamn moon kind of thrilled. He’d been into you since forever and had always felt totally comfortable around you. You were hilarious and cool and probably definitely the smartest person he knew, easy—not that the rest of his friends were like Rhodes scholars or anything.
Still, it kind of blew him away that someone like you was actually interested in him.
The longer you saw one another and the closer you got, he only liked you more and more. Then you guys started doing stuff and he sort of kind of lost his fucking mind. He’d never been with a person that felt so much like home; someone he felt like he could spend forever with, if you’d only have him. And the sex was…unbelievable.
You let your bodies have long, in-depth conversations that lasted into the night and then picked right back up again in the early morning. He hadn’t ruined this many sets of sheets since he was a snot-nosed pre-teen first discovering the loving embrace of his own fist. But as the fog of your initial sex haze dissipated, he couldn’t shake this one thought that kept coming back.
He didn’t want to toot his own horn or anything, but Eddie had it on pretty good authority he was above average when it came to making girls arrive. And with you…
Well, it was just different.
You were pretty quiet, for one. Which was kind of odd, considering how brash and brazen you could be normally. Eddie thought maybe you were just more subdued during sex. Sometimes it was the quietest, most mousy-looking girls who rattled his trailer roof the hardest. So maybe the reverse was also true? And there was nothing wrong with that, if it was. Just because he was vocal in bed, it certainly didn’t mean he expected you to be.
But when you came—or rather, when you said you were—it just didn’t quite feel like he expected.
He was no expert, mind you. But after having dealt so much in theatricality and role play, he’d developed quite an ear for insincerity. And you are anything but insincere.
When he had you pinned underneath him, his hips snapping as he drove you into the mattress, the way you squirmed and writhed and squeezed around him was pure fucking bliss. But then, just when he thought he was getting you going, you would be wrapping your hand around the back of his neck and pulling him in close so he could hear your heated whisper.
“Gonna come for me, beautiful?” he’d ask, his hand dipping between your bodies to rub at your clit. You’d nod, almost too blissed out to speak.
“I did, I did,” you told him, more breath than words. “I came already—I wanna feel you.”
And, well, when you say it like that…it’s all he can do not to blow his load on the spot. 
It’s not that he doesn’t believe you. He just thinks maybe you don’t know what it feels like to really come. So it’s not that you’re faking—something is definitely happening down there—it’s just not an orgasm. At least not a decent one.
At least not one he wants to claim.
Considering the guys you’d dated, he’s not all that surprised. They all sounded like losers who worried about themselves first and only. Dumb jerks who thought their dicks were magic wands that made girls come as soon as they set foot in the lobby. He didn’t want to be like them.
He wanted to take you to the fucking penthouse.
But it’s tricky. He can’t just bring up something like this, can he? He doesn’t want to offend you. He doesn’t want you thinking he’s saying there’s something wrong with you. Because of course there isn’t. And he doesn’t want to keep going without you knowing what he’s trying to do.
Like he said…it’s delicate.
So the next time he had you over, he let you lead. He made no move to change your course as you kissed down his bare inked chest, over the sparse patch of hair that swirled just beneath his navel, and pulled him hot and leaking from behind his blue checkered shield. And even as his instincts screamed in protest, he let you take him into the warmth of your mouth and bob on his cock until he came—a shuddering, whining, blubbering mess as he filled your throat.
All part of the plan. All part of the plan.
It took a bit of time for him to recover and he spent every second of it loving on you—each graze of his fingers and lips leisurely, but thorough. He kissed all the parts of you he thought might have been left unattended too long: the undersides of your breasts marked by the indentations of your bra; the soft span of skin that ran along the inside of your forearm to the crease of your elbow; the sides of your ribcage that quivered at the tickle of his warm breath.
And he watched your face every step of the way, studying you until you dropped fully into that deeply relaxed state. He let his hand drift down between your legs, skimming them over the sensitive skin there, making you tremble all over in anticipation. Alright, this was it.
“Hey, baby,” he murmured, a low rumble between kisses along your collarbone.
“Yeah?”
You hummed out your reply, looking down at him with heavy lidded eyes, half gone already. It made Eddie grin, his smile all teeth.
Oh, this was gonna be fun.
“I was wondering if you’ve ever had a multiple?”
The question made your brow wrinkle and you frowned slightly. “Multiple? Multiple what?”
“Multiple orgasms,” he said with a light chuckle. “Like if I fingered you until you came and then went down on you until you came again. Made you come over, and over, and over…”
You gasped as his tongue traced the shell of your ear, sending shivers down your body.
“Can that…does that happen?” you asked with a breathy sigh. He just smiled at the adorably incredulous look on your face and nodded.
“Of course,” he said. “I think that’s like the main thing you guys have going for you in this arena. Something to make up for all the annoying shit you have to put up with from your body.”
Another chuckle makes his chest shake as he rubs a hand over your lower belly, remembering how you’d asked him once just to press on it with his strong, warm palm and offer some relief from your cramps that were particularly bad one night.
“Oh. I mean…I’ve heard that, I guess. I kind of always thought it was a joke.”
“Well, I might not get you there,” Eddie said, giving you a smile he hopes is reassuring. “And if it doesn’t feel good or it hurts or anything, just tell me and we’ll stop. No harm, no foul.”
You pinched the edge of his comforter between your fingers and tugged at it, twisting it into a little peak at your side. “That sounds…really good,” you told him quietly.
“So, I can try?” he asked, brow lifting. “It’s okay?”
“I mean, yeah…” You chewed your lip, still a little hesitant. “But what about you?”
Eddie smirked, all sly and wily as he brushed the backs of his fingers along the softness of your cheek. “We did me already,” he reminded you.
Your cheeks heated at the memory, the taste of his come still sitting warm on your tongue as you swallowed thickly. Admittedly, you’d been kind of surprised when he let you go down on him first and actually finished in your mouth. Normally he was tugging you off him as soon as he felt himself losing it, grunting out something about not wanting to go too quickly.
“Okay,” you said with a small smile. “It just seems a little unfair”
“How’s it unfair if it’s what I want?” he murmured, voice dropping back to that low rumble.
Hard to argue with that, you supposed. 
A beaming smile spread across your face and you twisted your fingers in the ball chain necklace that dangled around his neck to pull him closer. You answered his question with the press of your lips against his own, inhaling a shaky breath when you pulled away. Eddie’s nose nudged against yours, mashing into the softness of your cheek to resume the kiss. His hand came up to cradle your jaw and his mouth moved in that slow, sensuous way that made your insides dance and leap and spin like an entire company of ballerinas.
The kiss itself is so dizzying, you almost forgot about Eddie’s initial intentions until you felt his fingers begin to gently glide through your soaking folds. He swallowed your little mewl of relief as two of them finally sank inside your warmth while his thumb brushed teasingly light over your clit. It doesn’t take long at all for your arousal to coat his fingers, for your body to gush for him.
“Ed, I’m…I’m coming,” you breathed out, tingling with that initial burst of pleasure.
“Thats it, baby,” Eddie nodded, going along with it one last time. “You’re doing so good for me.”
He drew a single, high moan out of you—more like a gasp of relief as your body fully relaxed and all the stiffness in your shoulders and tension in your limbs melted away. You let your head loll to the side and smiled, almost dazed with the feeling. Pride surged in his chest from the way you looked at him sometimes—so perfectly content and elated because he was all yours. 
The look he gave you was rapturous as he licked his lips and started to make his way down, leaving a trail of kisses in his wake that dotted across your chest, between the valley of your breasts, down your sternum and the soft pudge of your tummy. You propped yourself up to watch him as his mop of dark curls dipped between your thighs, fingers still sitting snug inside your warm, wet walls. Your chest rose and fell with each deep breath and he could only imagine how hard your heart must be pounding for you to try and slow it like you are.
“I’m gonna try for another, okay?” he soothed. “Stay relaxed for me, beautiful.”
You nodded back and let your head drop down, sinking deep into the embrace of your pillow.
Eddie pumped his fingers a few more times, faster now and crooking them upwards in search of that spot inside you that had eluded him far too long. The deftness of his touch coupled with the eager swipes of his tongue had your body heaving now as he traced a maddening pattern, swirling side to side and weaving it through your center.
Eyes suddenly fluttering open and closed, you whined softly and squirmed in his grasp as his tongue decisively swerved away from where you needed him most. The anticipation made your hips rock into his face, chasing more of the feeling as he teased you relentlessly.
His free arm promptly wrapped around your thigh, his hand gripping at the soft flesh to keep your legs spread apart. He was deeply thorough in his exploration, nose occasionally brushing against your clit that was practically crying out for his attention. His hot breath fanned along your inner thighs and he moaned deeply with each lick so you could feel the vibrations in your core.
You lost track of how long he was down there, allowing yourself to be swept away with the riot of sensations, realizing just a little too late your body was working towards something new. 
The feeling creeps up on you, trickling through your muscles, causing all of them to twitch and spasm, tensing and releasing in waves. Little whines and pants of pleasure start to spill out of your mouth, the desperate little sounds like the most beautiful music to Eddie’s ears.
It makes him grind down into the bed, desperate to hear more.
“Feel good?” he asked, brow lifting behind sweaty bangs as round doe eyes look up at you.
“So g-good,” you panted, the sound almost pained with pleasure. “So sensitive…”
“You taste like heaven, you know that?” he murmurs to your cunt. “I could do this forever.”
He genuinely could, but it seems he won’t have to. You’re getting close now. He can feel it in the way your thighs start to tremble against his ears; the way another gush of you floods across his tongue. His eyes darted sideways to where your hand rests on the blanket, flexing with the need to grab onto something. Anything.
One last time, he squeezed at the meat of your thigh and then unwrapped his arm from around it to reach out instead and thread his fingers with yours. Your grip is bone crushing and only makes him hold on tighter as he points the tip of his tongue to increase its pressure.
“E-Eddie, it feels…something feels different…”
“It’s okay, baby,” he said, the pace of his fingers never faltering. “I’ve got you, just let go.”
He wished he could bottle the look on your face. Eyes scrunched up, brow furrowed as though you were deep in concentration. Lips parted in a wanton gasp as your chest swelled. His mouth came back to your clit, resuming the motions that had you clenching around his fingers.
“Oh…ohhh my…oh, fuck…”
When he feels you starting to unravel, feels that band coiled tight in your core start to snap, it takes everything he has in him to stay the course—especially when the hand of yours he’s not holding winds into his hair and you grasp desperately at his curls. The groan it elicits from him is deep and guttural, the sound of it radiating in the room. And finally he feels it happening—your pussy spasming around his fingers, threatening to snap them clean off you’re clenching so tight; hips bucking and stomach quivering with the effort of drawing breath.
“Fuck, Eddie, don’t stop!” you cried out. “That feels so good, holy fucking shit—”
So much for being quiet, Eddie thought mischievously.
Your head is pushing back into the pillow now, back arching under you, lifting you off the bed. He’s clamped tight against you though, his lips sealed around your clit and sucking like his life depends on it. In a way, it feels like it does.
“I’m gon…I’m gonna…I’m co—”
The words dissolve into a moan, the sound of it higher and louder than anything else Eddie has drawn out of you before. Pride explodes in his chest as he finally feels what he’s been waiting for—that exquisite vice around his fingers as he continues to stroke that sacred spot.
Your body floods with the feeling, waves of it surging through you, seeing white behind your eyes that are still pinched shut. It’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt before—every synapse firing at once, every molecule in your body exploding like a tiny firework.
Distantly, you register his voice coaxing you through it as you reluctantly return to earth. Yes, baby, that’s it, thaaaat’s it—fuck me, you’re so fucking hot when you come, Jesus fucking Christ…
You opened your eyes, blinking through bleary vision as the world came back into focus.
Eddie grinned, smile almost wolfish when he lifted himself from between your legs. Triumph flashed in his dark eyes, his gaze roving all over as he began a slow crawl up your body, his cock now standing at attention with its vigor renewed.
“Okay,” he panted, dragging his hand across his mouth and chin that were slick with your spend as he leaned in to kiss you. “That’s one.”
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sleepanonymous · 6 months
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Legend has it if you listen to this soundcheck on repeat it will clear your skin, water your crops, and cure your depression. I hope this heals all of you like it has healed me.
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clouvu · 5 months
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Offering lil doodles of them bc my eyes have been opened
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hinamie · 8 days
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dropped everything because i had to do a proper tribute :( have an updated redraw of my very first yoi piece
2016 - 2017 - 2024
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bacchuschucklefuck · 9 days
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she turns, makes direct eye contact with you, smiles,
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claraoswalds · 7 months
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The Idiot's Lantern // The Stolen Earth
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