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teenidlegirl · 3 months

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꣑୧ ݁.﹒𝓣𝐇𝐄 𝓑𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐑 𝓝𝐄𝐗𝐓 𝓓𝐎𝐎𝐑 .ᐟ

ઇ ˚ ݂ ֹ ꒰ biker!miguel 𝓍 fem!reader ꒱ ! ۟ ׅ ♡

˒ ♡ ៸៸𓂃 𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 ˖ ׁ ⁩ .ᐟ a charming guy with a bike moves next door. you two embark in an interesting connection which becomes something much more.

˒ ♡ ៸៸𓂃 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕 ˖ ׁ ⁩ .ᐟ modern!au, neighbors to lovers, fluff, sprinkle of angst, slow-burn, tension, swearing, pet names, spanish terms, smut, references of sex, implied short reader, hispanic/latina!reader, long ass fic 【 mdni 】

( ꯭♡︎ ) ˖ ࣪ . love note ˒˒ this idea randomly popped in my head while listening to “outside” by calvin harris.

the u-hual truck and several boxes on the curb. a new neighbor moving in, specifically next door to you. that house has been empty for some time and seeing it finally being occupied was a sight. looking through the blinds, you couldn’t see the new neighbors but only the two move-in guys. there seems to be a bike barked in the driveway, a black duacti to be exact.

oh now that is intriguing.

your new neighbor is a motorcycle rider. the bike is quite beautiful. your dad would be hella jealous since he adores ducatis. since there is a bike, where is the owner? scanning the area for the possible owner, a man dressed in all black with motorcycle jacket approached the u-haul truck to grab a big box that seems way too heavy to carry. but it seems the guy is a gym fanatic due to his bulky structure.

holy shit.

the dude is handsome as fuck.

dark chocolate locks along with some very visible strong cheekbones even from this distance. not only is he bulky as hell but also extremely freakishly tall. goddamn the man is probably over 6 feet. the move-in guys are only up to his collarbone and they are pretty tall themselves. this dude is a giant most likely.

this man is your new neighbor?

well fucking hell.

lifting your finger off from the blinds, you step away from your window to resume your day. although, it would be difficult to concentrate on anything since your mind is infiltrated with images of your new neighbor. you’ve never even met the guy and yet he’s all you could think about. get your shit together.

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you were returning home from work. pulling up into your driveway, you spot your new neighbor in his garage cleaning his bike. slowly getting out of your car, you sneak at glance at him without being suspicious. well, you’re wearing your black cateye sunglasses so nobody could tell if you’re looking directly at them or not. grabbing your purse and locking the car, you decide to introduce yourself.

fuck it, why not.

walking up his driveway to the garage, your ears were filled with music. the speaker be blasting linkin park. good music taste he has, definitely noted. he seems to not acknowledge your upcoming arrival since he’s too concentrated on cleaning his bike with a rag. now he must’ve acknowledge your presence as the corners of his lips curl up into a little smirk.

“ducati. badass.” you comment, stopping only a few feet from him so you don’t invade his space.

he let out an appreciative hum. “panigale v2.” his eyes never tear from the bike as he continues cleaning it with the black rag.

your eyebrows slightly raise in surprise. “my dad would be jealous. he used to own one but had to sell it to buy a car.” you cross your arms over your chest, obscuring him through your sunglasses.

“poor guy but understandable.” he wipes down the last bit of the bike before putting the rag away in a bucket next to him. “so which neighbor are you?” he never looks up at you as he starts scrubbing the front tire with a small black scrubby.

“next door to the left.” you tilt your head a bit to the side, digging your hands into the back pockets of your denim jeans.

“oh so you’re the one with the loud dog.” the guy couldn’t resist a smirk, sensing your light glare.

“not my fault he misses me.” you shrugged.

a low chuckle escapes his lips. “maybe you should be home more often.”

you look at him dumbfounded by his joke but you play along since it’s fun. “if only work was that easy. plus, he’s a husky, they’re criers.” that earns you another chuckle from him.

“what’s his name?”

“shane.”

you watch one of his thick eyebrows quirk upwards. “that’s an interesting name for a dog but it’s cool, quite unique.” after scrubbing the last bit of the tire, he drops the scrubby into the buckle, stands up from the little stool and turns to face you.

goddamn — he’s even taller than you thought. you have to crane your neck all the way up just to look at him. and dear lord this man is just pure muscle. the black shirt he’s wearing looks so tight on him that it acts more like a compression shirt. those broad shoulders stick out heavily, so mouthwatery. and that motherfucking waist, damn it’s so slutty that it’s a crime to have it that pinched. a damn greek god.

him on the other hand, traces your figure with his eyes. shit those denim jeans hug your thighs so perfectly, a little too tight to be honest which makes his chest warm. although, he was taken aback by your sunglasses, concealing your face that he desperately wants to see.

cleaning his hands with a clean rag, he walks up to you reaching out a hand to shake. “i’m miguel.”

you push your sunglasses on top of your head before taking his hand and gently shake it. “[y/n].” a little smile gracing your glossy lips with a head tilt.

miguel’s pupils dilate drastically from your face reveal. wow — you are very attractive, beautiful in fact. those gorgeous irises staring into his own and glossy lips that taunt him.

his pretty neighbor.

and he, your handsome neighbor.

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“fuck!” you slap the stirring wheel. the car isn’t working. just fucking great, now you’re gonna be late for work and your boss is gonna murder you.

well this is a shitty fucking day. first you slipped coffee over your cute white blouse, now your car is broken. a lot groan of frustration escapes your lips as you rest your forehead on the wheel.

your frustration didn’t go unnoticed by a set of brown eyes from next door. miguel was preparing to leave for the gym until he saw you shouting inside your car. he couldn’t help but smile in amusement watching you getting pissed off. the sounds of the failing engine answered his question. he watches you get out of your car and slam the door, a few curses in between spanish and english escaping your lips. resting his helmet on the bike, miguel slowly walks over with arms folded across his chest.

“dead engine?” he asks, head titled a bit.

a sigh of frustration escapes you, rubbing the temples of your forehead with one hand while the other rests on your hip. “yeah so now i’m gonna be late for work. chingado…” you rest your lower back against the car, not meeting his gaze.

“i can give you a ride.” miguel suggested, his eyes analyzing your expression and body language.

you shook your head. “no it’s fine. i’ll just take an uber.” you pull out your phone from your back pocket to open up the app but a large hand snatches your phone. “hey! what the fuck man—“

“you don’t need an uber. i’ll take you, end of discussion.” miguel turns around and walks back to his bike, your phone in his hand.

“dude—“ you groan, rolling your eyes. well, you don’t have any other option since he took your phone. letting out another sigh, you follow him to his garage. “can i at least have my phone back? i promise i won’t take an uber.” you cross your arms with ahead tilt.

he stares at you for a moment to see if you were lying or not. then, he hands back your phone which you take very swiftly and put in back in your pocket, making him smirk. miguel walks over to a shelf with a collection of helmets and grabs a red one. he walks back to you and hands you the helmet.

“you ever ridden one?” he asks as he puts on his gloves then his helmet.

“just once with my cousin but that was years ago.” you move your hair out of your face and put on the helmet. it’s quite big on you, considering it’s his so of course it’s big. luckily it has straps for adjustment. now it fits a little better, still loose but better.

he only responds with a low hum.

walking up to the bike, a moment of realization hits you. it’s a big bike, well, all motorcycles are big. maybe it’s because your small and short as fuck.

how the fuck are you gonna get on that thing?

“need some help?” his baritone makes you snap out of thought as if he knew.

“well…” you didn’t even get finish your sentence when you felt his hands on your waist and suddenly lift you up to place you on the bike, making you gasp as you instinctively hold onto his biceps as support. your reaction earns a low chuckle from him.

“you could’ve warned me, cabrón.” you shoot him a glare as you swing one leg over the bike so now you’re straddling it, shifting a little to be comfortable.

those brown irises land directly on your thighs. they got thicker and plumper when you sat down. his mouth instantly watered at the sight. thankfully for his helmet, you couldn’t see his stupid expression. without answering back, he gets on the bike. miguel lowers the shield of his helmet then grips onto the handlebars, clenching those gloved hands.

“scoot a bit closer.” he said, head turned to the side where he sees your from the corner of his eye.

you look dumbfounded at his request. is this dude serious? since you don’t obey, miguel reached behind and grabs under your thighs, pulling you closer until your chest is against his back. a soft gasp escapes your lips at the sudden motion. not gonna lie, your stomach did a summersault. now your face slightly flushed. you lower the shield of the helmet to hide it. at first you were hesitant to touch him but you have no other choice. very slowly, you wrap your arms around his waist and rest your head on his broad back. miguel can sense your hesitation, making him smirk underneath his helmet. gripping the handlebars once again, he turns his head to the side.

“hold on tight, chula.” he said so mischievously before turning on the engine and slowly start driving out of the garage then onto the road.

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so your growing friendship with your neighbor was interesting. is it even friendship? to be honest, it’s unclear what you two have. maybe an acquaintance since you’re simply neighbors. however, it feels more than just that. a strange bond between you two. but things got a little heated when you popped by while he was cleaning his bike, for the millionth time.

it was a hot day so you decided to wear a yellow summer dress. walking over to his opened garage, music blasts in your ears but you don’t mind. you’re a big music lover yourself. it’s the weeknd this time. this dude got great music taste. two of your favorite artists, linkin park and the weeknd. two things you have in common, definitely noted.

your pupils dilate drastically at the sigh of your neighbor. he wears a black wife beater that reveals his muscles so perfectly. holy fuck — he is built. each outline of his muscles is visible to the eye. but what makes your knees weak is those fucking gray sweatpants that hang below his waist.

fuck — he definitely chose that outfit on purpose.

snapping out of those horny ass thoughts, you approach him with crossed arms. “how many times do you clean that damn bike?”

miguel snorts, a little smirk gracing those plump lips of his. “gotta keep it perfect.” he uses a navy blue rag to wipe the front of the bike, sitting on a tiny stool.

“alright, mr perfectionist.” sarcasm at its peak but doesn’t affect him, only making him chuckle.

“at least i don’t have bird shit.” he teases.

you scoffed, rolling your eyes. “i haven’t had the chance to get a car wash. work has been up my ass lately.” you want to slap off that growing stupid smirk on his face so badly. ugh this motherfucker.

“i could clean it for you, chiquita. all you have to do is ask. but of course, there’ll be a price.” a mischievous smirk illustrating his face as he glances at you. his eyes widen a bit at your dress. how pretty you look in it, yellow definitely suits you.

“ugh as if i would ever pay you, no thank you.” so sassy but he likes that.

he gets from the tiny stool. “just saying, chiquita.” miguel walks over to the counter to grab some stuff.

you roll your eyes once again before walking over to his bike. it’s a really gorgeous bike, so polished and clean. you’ve only seen the classic red ducati so seeing a black is a surprise but a cool surprise.

you decide to sit down the edge of the seat, your feet dangling since you’re so short. the cold metal hitting against your skin of your exposed legs, making you shiver a little at the cold sensation.

turning around, a small smile crept onto his face when he sees you sitting on the bike. walking back, miguel grabs the little stool and placed it down in front of the back tire. he sits back down, right next to your left leg as he begins scrubbing the tire.

while he continues cleaning, you glance around his garage. bunch of car supplies and cleaning equipment. not much decor other than the shelves of plastic black boxes. you realize the entire garage glows under warm lighting. it’s golden hour. turning to face the driveway, you’re greeted with the bright vibrant sun shining down on you. luckily you have your sunglasses so you put them over your eyes. you relish the delicious warmth of the sun, leaning back a little on the bike.

a refreshing breeze passes by, making your hair flow gracefully in the air. but your hair isn’t the only thing affected by the wind. the skirt portion of your dress flows. as miguel’s eyes tear away from the spot he was cleaning, he noticed your dress flowing in the wind a little too freely as it flows upwards revealing your pastel yellow panties underneath. his eyes widen at the sight as he felt his face grow hot, hints of pink staining his cheeks. miguel quickly looks away when you look back, painting a neutral face as if he didn’t just see your panties.

“bitch ass wind.” you murmured in annoyance, flattening down your dress, fully unaware of the peeping tom next to you. glancing down at miguel, you noticed the slight hint of pink on his face, making you quirk an brow. “what’s up with you?”

while trying to remain normal despite the image of your panties infiltrating his mind, he brushed it off so casually. “the sun, it’s too much.”

you stare at him for a moment then decide to let it slide with a hum. it’s true, standing under the sunlight for a while makes you feel hot. one time you went to the beach, even with sunscreen yet you still got burnt. you understand him.

after some time, miguel finishes and puts the cleaning supplies back on the shelves. when he turns around and walks back, you’re still sitting on the bike as if it were yours. the sight makes him smirk.

“comfortable much?” he stands beside you, bulky arms crossed over his chest.

“surprisingly, yeah it is.” you glance down at your seat then back up at him. you’re taken back by how close he was, literally right next to you. he towers you so easily, even when you stand. your eyes instantly land on his arms, his muscles flexing. goddamn he’s so built it’s insane. thank god for your sunglasses but for some reason he can tell you’re staring by the smug look on his devilish handsome face.

you then decide to hop off the bike and walk back to your house without looking back. “later, guapo.” the skirt of your dress sways along with your hips, making miguel feel hot and bothered at the sight.

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since that day, miguel hasn’t been the same. those repeated images of your panties infiltrated his mind a like damn plague. no matter what he was doing or where he was at, those images haunted him to the point of insanity. don’t even ask what he does at night because it very obvious. jacking off in his bed, moaning and whimpering like a little bitch. bro was so horny that he felt embarrassed and ashamed for thinking about his neighbor like that.

curse the fucking wind that day.

like you said, “bitch ass wind.”

oh and don’t even start with his weird ass behavior afterwards. miguel started avoiding you like a virus. bro was so down bad for you that he couldn’t even stay in the same room with you. he tried to be like his normal self but low-key he was going insane. not only because of the pantie flash but really because miguel likes you. the sassy, sexy diva energy radiating from you he adores a lot. he couldn’t get you out of his mind. all miguel thought about is you.

you, on the other hand, were confused by the sudden silent treatment. whenever you would visit his place, the garage was always closed. you’d knock or ring the doorbell but no answer. when you did see him, miguel was already drifting off on his bike. not gonna lie, you were a bit butthurt by the sudden distance. did you do or said something wrong? did you make him feel uncomfortable? millions of negative thoughts ran through your mind, wondering the cause for miguel's distance.

after some time, you demanded some answers.

his garage was open for the first time in two weeks. although, miguel isn’t nowhere to be found. his bike is parked so it means he’s home, probably dealing with something inside. while waiting for him, you wander around the garage looking at his stuff.

returning from his room, miguel stops in his tracks the moment he sees you. oh fuck — the woman who’s been plaguing his mind for two weeks stands in his garage only for one reason; and that reason scares him. he nervously glups as he watches you turn around. shit — you’re wearing the damn yellow dress again; the dress that accidentally flashed you.

“hey. what the hell is up with you? you’ve been avoiding me like some fucking plague. did i do something wrong?” you walk towards him, brows furrowed in a concern manner.

ah shit — he knew this would happen.

“no. i’ve just been busy with work.” miguel walks past you, heading towards one of the shelves of supplies. he can feel his heart beating fast, feeling anxious, and his palms growing clammy.

you follow him with a disbelief look on your face. “clearly i did something wrong because we haven’t talked or hung out in two weeks.”

shit shit shit.

now his heart is racing fucking wild. how the hell is he supposed to tell you? he can’t even look at you in the eye, too embarrassed and ashamed.

okay now you’re worried, or confused, or both to be honest. his strange behavior is now getting on your nerves. you notice his clenched fists at his sides, repeatedly opening and closing. you walk around him so you could stand beside him, almost in front.

“dude — what’s going on?” you sound genuinely concerned, looking up at him with furrowed brows.

just as your lips part open to say something, only a gasp spills from your lips as miguel grabs you by the waist and pushes you back against the ledge of the counter. his chest close contact with your face, both of your bodies pressed together leaving no space, sandwiching you between him and the counter. your hot and heavy breaths fill the air between you. very slowly, you nervously look up at the man who towers over you. both of his hands rest on your waist with a firm grip, gently grouping the dip of it. pure lust in those beautiful brown irises of his.

‘oh fuck me’, you thought to yourself.

your body tenses as he leans down towards your ear. “do you have any idea what you do to me? these past two weeks has been torture for me. all i could think about was you and those cute yellow panties you wore with that exact same dress you’re wearing right now.” he ends it with a squeeze to your waist.

oh fuck — his husky voice sends shivers down to your core, making your face flushed. he was thinking about you this entire time? now that’s a mindfuck. your heart skips a beat at his seductive confession. your chest heaves, breathing heavily.

does it make things worse the fact you’re wearing those exact panties right now?

“all i wanna do is ravish you. run my hands over your gorgeous body. bury my face in between those delicious thighs and make you cry from pleasure. scream my name until you can’t remember anything.” his hands slowly run up and down your sides, making you shiver at the sensation.

you can’t help but whimper at his words. god is this really happening? your handsome neighbor, who’ve you been secretly crushing on, wants you. fuck — you can feel your clit pulsating in anticipation.

“mig-miguel…” you softly moan.

“por favor, hermosita. let me have you, worship you.” miguel couldn’t help but start kissing your neck, right on the sweat spot which makes you whimper.

your arms slowly trail up his body until you wrap them around his thick neck, gripping the ends of his hair, making him pull back to look at you.

“worship me, miguelito.” lust laced in your tone.

his eyes darken, pupils dilating at your words. fuck the nickname hits him hard, sending jolts of pleasure down to his dick. he feels himself growing tight in his pants, a bulge forming. without hesitation, miguel smashes his lips against yours in a hungry kiss. god both of you have been waiting for this moment. you guys are practically eating each other’s faces. his tongue sneaks in, licking your lips for access which you gladly accept. a shared moan echoes in the air between you as you explore each other’s mouths. you dig your fingers into his dark chocolate locks while his hands roam your body, groping your curves.

without warning, miguel lifts you up by the waist and plants you on the counter. a soft gasp spills from you when you felt the raging bulge in his pants against your clothed core. while indulging in your heated makeout session, you feel a large hand slowly trailing up your legs towards your inner thighs. your breath hitches when you feel his fingers brushing against your panties, lightly rubbing your clothed core. another hand gently groping one breast. muffled soft moans spill from yours which eggs miguel on. he can’t take it anymore. grabbing underneath your thighs, he lifts you up and carries you out of garage and into his house. he shuts the garage door with a remote on his way inside.

as much as he wanted to take you on the floor of his garage, miguel wanted your first time together in a more comfortable setting.

and holy fuck — you’ve never orgasmed so many times in your life. he pull one after another from you, leaving you breathless and fucked out. also, probably the biggest dick you’ve ever taken. bro filled you up to the motherfucking brim, you’re on the pill so it’s fine but still risky (condoms are better).

and the aftercare, oh my god miguel is the sweetest man. such a gentleman, being sweet and caring towards you. made sure you were okay, getting anything you needed. gentle touches to make sure he doesn’t overwhelm you, whispering praises.

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ever since that night, you started dating.

y’all were fucking almost everyday.

one time, you rode him on his bike. yeah you read that. his garage was filled with your moans, echoing in those four walls. you holding onto his shoulders for dear life while riding the shit outta him. that was a fantasy come true for miguel, fucking you on his bike. oh he was a happy, horny camper. of course the garage door was closed so no one could see you two horny fucks. although, miguel wouldn’t mind people seeing you getting fucked so good by him, to make other men jealous and boost his ego.

the next time was on the floor of his garage. as much as you disliked the cold hard feeling of the floor, you were too cock drunk to care. another one of miguel’s fantasies coming true.

then it was in each other’s bedrooms, mostly miguel’s because he loved having you in his bed. one night after coming from your highs, both of you a panting and sweating mess, you stare up at the ceiling. miguel turns to look down at you, his eyes analyzing your expression.

“what are you thinking?” he was still a bit breathless, caressing your cheek with one hand.

your eyes remain glued to the ceiling. “i think we should just move in together at this point. it’s kinda stupid we’re together yet live in separate houses.”

a smile graces his lips at your confession. “then move in conmigo.” his smile grew wilder when he watched you turn quickly to look at him.

“my house is nicer, plus i have a pool and you don’t.” you shoot him an unimpressed look.

a low chuckle escapes his plump lips which makes your heart flutter. “vale vale, you win. demonio.” miguel continues caressing your cheek, relishing your soft skin against his palm. he nuzzles in your neck, planting butterfly kisses on your warm skin while his hands gently grope your curves.

you let out a satisfied hum as you run your fingers delicately through his dark chocolate locks. the both of you relax in bed, embracing each other.

you love your next door neighbor biker boyfriend.

ᡣ𐭩ㅤㅤ ݁. 𝓣𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ˖ ࣪ ༘ @loser-alert @midnight-the-shadow-wolf @eatalyy @primroselovessupernatural @ghost-lantern @gaygerthelame

#꒰ ˖ ࣪ . 𐙚 ⊹ ꒱ — 𝓞𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐓 .ᐟ #biker!miguel #miguel o’hara x fem!reader #miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o'hara x fem!reader #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o’hara x you #miguel o’hara x y/n #miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara fanfiction #across the spiderverse #oneshot

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mediumgayitalian · 2 months

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prev chapter

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“Okay,” Will says, when they’re comfortably on the road. This early in the morning, Highway 17 is practically empty; nothing but sunny skies and clear air rushing through the open roof. The emptiness may also be attributed to the fact that it is a random Tuesday. “Pick a number between one and nine.”

“Uh, five.”

“Good choice, good choice.”

He opens the centre console, digging around Nico’s – well, and his, at this point – collection of CDs to find the right one. He makes a little noise of triumph when he finds it, blowing on the back and wiping it on his shirt before sliding it into the port.

“One half-assed polish isn’t gonna fix those scratches, Solace,” he teases.

“If you weren’t such an emo fuck, Playlist Five wouldn’t be so scratched.”

Nico laughs, conceding this round. Will looks inordinately pleased, nose scrunching along with his tiny smile even as Linkin Park starts blasting through the speakers, which he hates.

“Three songs ‘til Britney,” he grouches as Nico starts hollering along to Points of Authority. Nico shakes his head, still grinning – as if he didn’t make these playlists. If he is truly so miserable, he wouldn’t have put the song on at all.

(Nico knows, in the very back of his mind, that Will actually and truly cannot stand Linkin Park. To him, it’s not music at all. He has never been able to get into it, as much as he truly likes music of every genre. If Linkin Park is on this playlist, and they’re on more than one of the playlists Will has made specifically for their shared car rides, it’s because he cares about Nico more than he hates the band. Nico shoves this knowledge deep into the dustiest corners of his mind, because that’s more than he can afford to think about.)

The next couple hours pass by comfortably. There isn’t much to remark on the side of the road except the odd fruit stand, or farm advertising eggs and honey, so onward Nico drives. He keeps an eye on the odometer, but mostly trusts Will’s calculations. If he says they won’t need gas ‘til Anthony, wherever the hell that is, Nico believes him.

“Highway changes to the 98 through here,” Will says, nodding to the tiny sign that boasts nothing except Ft. Meade CITY LIMITS, right next to the giant banner half the size of the church it's attached to that reads, REPENT OR BURN.

Ah, Florida. Please one day change.

“Do I need to exit?”

“Nope, the road just changes to a different number.”

He eases off the gas as they approach the tiny town, watching carefully for state troopers. And, like, children, probably. So far he’s passed twelve gun ranges and one school, but whatever. He can have priorities, even if this garbage state doesn’t.

“Hm. 98 is a better number.”

“Absolutely not,” Will tells him, aghast. “17 is a prime number!”

“Ninety-eight is more fun to say. Also, prime numbers suck.”

“You take that back –”

Nico slides up his sunglasses, shaking his head fondly. Nerdiest nerd to ever nerd. He would be embarrassed if he wasn’t so endeared.

He presses back on the accelerator as they exit the town, turning up the music as Will’s rant ends. He shucks off his shoes – Feet off my goddamn dash, Solace – and curls up into his seat, burying himself in a book. Nico glances away from the road to try and read the title, but quickly gives up since the font is bright fucking purple, for some reason, and in some horrible looping shape that he knows will give him a migraine. All graphic designers should be in prison.

“Hey, there’s apparently a gator reserve forty-five minutes ahead.” Nico squints again at the book. Barely, he can make out “roadside” and “weird”. “‘Weird American Roadside Attractions’,” Will reads aloud, noticing Nico looking. “Such as a very nice and highly rated gator reserve –”

“No.”

“Road trip, Nico. Adventure.”

“I’m super happy to adventure away from living fucking dinosaurs, Solace.”

“Aw, come on, they’re kinda cute –”

“Two thousand pounds per square inch of jaw strength! You are the one who told me that!”

“You don’t think you could take one in a fight?”

Nico stares at his best friend incredulously. He’s got a thoughtful little frown on his face, looking at the sky as he contemplates. Nico notices, vaguely, that the shade of his irises is the exact same colour.

“No, I do not. Obviously.” He pauses. “You think you could take a fuckin’ gator?”

“I think it’s possible.”

“See, that’s crazy, because fifteen seconds ago I genuinely believed you were an intelligent person.”

“Do not lie to me and tell me you don’t have a list of animals you know you could take in a fight,” Will says, instead of rising to the bait. He waits, meeting Nico’s glare, eyebrows raised.

“An ostrich,” Nico admits, begrudgingly. “I feel like – one good punch to the throat –”

Will smiles smugly at him. “That’s what I thought.” He turns back to his book, fiddling with the corner of a page. “Also, ostriches are more closely related to dinosaurs than alligators. So. Check and mate, motherfucker.”

They pull into Anthony at around eleven, at pretty much exactly a quarter tank – just like Will predicted. He looks inordinately pleased about it, so Nico shoots off a quick prayer to the karma gods.

He trips on his way out of the Jeep. Nico smirks.

“I’m gonna go stretch my legs,” he says, unaware of Nico’s hand in his humbling. Nico waves him off, attention turned to the gas pump.

Annoyingly, as he pulls out his card and handles the pump, he remembers Will’s scrunched nose and pursed lips as he’d explained, when they were 16, how gas station pumps were frequently more germy than their toilets, and cleaned approximately one hundred percent less. Suddenly, his hand begins to feel grimey.

Twelve bags of chips, a gas station slushie, and a pair of clean hands later, Will is still nowhere to be found. Nico frowns, craning his neck to look around the tiny parking lot as if he somehow missed Will’s neon orange shirt the first time he looked. Still not catching sight of him, he walks hesitantly back to the Jeep, tucking his snacks away and biting his lip, contemplating. Will is both very fast and very easily distracted, but he has enough sense not to go too far in a random town five hours from home. If he sticks by the car and waits, Will’ll be back soon.

But, on the other hand, waiting is torture.

Easy decision, really.

He locks the door, hopes that no one will show up with a pair of wire cutters and a flathead screw driver, and sets off. The first thing he notices, and he adds it to his mental list of things to loudly complain about when Will is locked in the car with him, is that it is fucking sweltering. In the hours approaching the afternoon, the day has gone to pleasantly warm to so hot the air is actually thick with it, and he doesn’t have wind ripping through the open windows to cool him down. Plus, he’s wearing jeans, and for the first, and hopefully only, time in his life, he envies his friend’s cargo shorts.

The second thing he notices is that Anthony, Florida, is empty as shit. All the love in his heart to the people who call it home, but also, move, maybe. He’s hesitant to stray too far from the gas station, in case Will comes back and finds him gone, but there are no hills or anything. He can see quite far down the road. The only thing he sees is a possum starting a fight with a poor random guy – which, actually, is kind of fun to watch.

Perhaps he has judged Anthony too harshly.

“Nico!” shouts a voice, startling him. He whips around and finds Will, standing in the goddamn centre of the road, the dumbass, waving like a lunatic.

“There is no possible way I was going to miss you,” Nico informs him when he’s close enough. “You are approximately the height of the Washington monument. I could not miss you if I tried.”

“I wasn’t waving to get your attention, I was waving to shoo away the eagles that mistook you for a mouse.”

Nico kicks him in the shin. Will, well used to his violence, dodges, grinning, except in the act of hopping away from Nico’s dangerously hardy boots, he somehow wraps his foot around his own ankle and goes sprawling.

Nico smirks. “Who’s the short one now.”

Faster than he can even follow, Will’s hand darts out, wrapping around his ankle, and tugs, yanking him yelping on the asphalt next to him.

“Foul!”

“All’s fair in love and war, Neeks.”

Shut the fuck up shut the fuck up shut the fuck up, Nico screams at the alarm bells blaring in his brain, he doesn’t mean it like that and you know it oh shit he’s looking this way quick look normal look normal –

“I can do war if that’s what you want, Solace,” he manages, honestly quite proud of himself for managing speech with approximately fourteen percent of his brain still functioning. Damn.

“Yeah, yeah. Anyway.” He crawls to his feet, offering Nico a hand. He takes it, dutifully fighting the urge to pull Will down again, just to be an asshole. He’s cool like that, and most definitely being normal about the scrape of Will’s callused fingers against the inside of his forearm. “I found maybe the funniest thing I’ve ever seen, and I need you to come look at it immediately.”

“Sick,” Nico says, immediately intrigued. He and Will have their differences, sure, but if there’s one thing they can agree on it’s their sense of humour.

He follows will down the road, passing the gas station again. (His car, thankfully, remains in one piece and beautifully not-robbed.) They dark across an empty intersection, walking across a yellowed lawn as they approach a run-down, patchy, one-storey bungalow with a rusted sign that reads: The Iron Works.

“Behold,” says Will gleefully, “the Abstract Iron Centaur.”

And behold, Nico does.

Gaping, he observes the structure standing proudly under the sign. Striding proudly, rather, its front legs bent to simulate movement, its human arms poised as if ready to strike. It wears a medieval knight’s helmet, and holds a rusted axe. The entire structure is a little taller than Will, and made of, presumably, iron, rusted into a light roan red.

“Abstract Iron Centaur,” Nico repeats, after several minutes of silence.

Will still looks delighted. “It was in my book. I had no idea what to expect and also I didn’t believe it was real. Isn’t it the greatest thing you’ve ever seen?”

“It’s…something.”

“We gotta take a picture, Neeks. I never want to forget this thing.”

Nico allows himself to be pulled, still somewhat bewildered. It’s not even the oddest thing he’s ever seen, it’s just – he has many questions, like, for example, why? How long has this creature existed? How long will it persist? Who created it? Why is it in Will’s dorky book? Does it house a soul?

“Okay, squish in, this camera is older than your elderly ass and doesn’t have a timer.”

The familiar jab breaks him out of his stupor. “Seven months older than you, fucker.”

“Geriatric.”

Without warning, Will crowds them under the Abstract Iron Centaur’s lifted arm, and then presses his widely grinning cheek right flush to Nico’s, raising his beat-up camera to the air.

Nico’s brain goes static.

“Say cheese!”

“Hnngh,” says Nico, as the camera blinds him.

Luckily for his continuously worsening blood pressure, Will pulls away the second he hears the click, shaking the ejected negative to help it develop, and Nico has a second to remind his lungs that they have a function, actually, get your shit together, I am not dying in fucking Anthony, Florida.

“You look like a dork!” Will says, delighted. “Look!”

Blinking at the photo shoved one sixteenth of an inch from his eyeballs, Nico indeed looks. The Abstract Iron Centaur looks more foreboding on camera, somehow, but Nico barely notices it – instead, he finds his gaze drawn to the beam so wide it forces Will’s eyes shut, and the dazed, dopey look on his own face; eyes wide, mouth dropped, slightly, and posture undeniably leaning into Will’s magnetism.

Humming to himself, Will slips his wallet out of (one of) the (many) pocket(s) of his shorts, tucking the photo inside it. Nico melts into a puddle of goo on the dead grass. His mortal soul escapes his body, descending rapidly. His atoms return to star dust. Et cetera.

“Oh, shit, we gotta go if we want to reach Georgia in good time.”

“Right,” says Nico, voice cracking. He clears his throat and tries again. “Let’s go.”

He absolutely does not haul ass to his car. He walks at a normal pace, for normal reasons, thoughts in a normal place.

“Back on the 75,” Will instructs as they peel out, sliding sunglasses on his nose. “We gotta scoot around town a bit to get to the entrance, but it won’t take long.”

“D’you know this place?” Nico asks, even though he doubts it. As far as he knows, Will was outside of Sarasota one time: in the move from Austin. He supposes his mother might have had a concert up here, or something, and unusually, let him tag along, but he doubts it.

“Nah, just memorised the map.”

Nico hides a smile. “Oh, of course.”

It’s all too easy to tease Will, but there was a reason he was valedictorian. There’s a reason for his many shining scholarship offers, his endless well of ridiculous facts pulled from nowhere. He is, genuinely, the smartest person Nico has ever met.

Even if he genuinely believes he can fight an alligator and win.

“Two hours ‘til we cross state lines,” Will says brightly, shouting slightly over the wind as they merge onto the highway. “And then on to infinity!”

“Onto infinity,” Nico agrees, matching his smile.

Already, he’s proved Nico wrong. They’re farther now than Will has been since he was seven, and there’s nothing in his expression that suggests he wants to slow down.

Privately, and quietly, Nico lets himself start to hope.

———

next chapter

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kylejsugarman · 1 year

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12 year old jesse pinkman went to school and drew OC’s on notebook paper that he would post on deviantart later that day and flipped off his math teacher behind her back and jumped up to slap the top of doorways and then went home to listen to sum 41 and linkin park on his giant headphones while he played on his playstation and went to go ride (read: fall off) his skateboard with his friends. he didn’t know what methylamine was.

#syd squeaks #young rebel cringe jesse is so precious to me. he is just having a good time #jesse pinkman #breaking bad

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thatonewatching · 11 months

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My creepypasta/marble hornets head canons (SFW)

Hoodie/Brian

Black coffee No cologne Picks at his skin or taps his foot Likes big dogs but feeds the stray cats Scar going down his chest from a fight w/ Masky Good friends with E.J. Likes kids, and wishes he could have them Won't have kids because of his line of work Closed off Selective mutism Anger issues but relatively calm Insomniac Scary dog privilege Hates being a proxy Refuses to take his mask off around the others Keeps camera on him at all times Loves literature Very smart Limited interests Majored in literature Sarcastic Low self esteem Listens to punk rock Hopeless romantic Speaks another language (Russian probably) Mature but can be petty Fatherly Plays piano Is very skilled at playing piano Cannot cook to save his fucking life Can sew Wakes up so damn early Lanky bitch Has no taste in fashion or decor Apartment is practically empty Honest Chews a lot of gum

Masky Stubborn Chubby Hairy motherfucker Intimidating Pours milk before cereal Will now refuse cheesecake (y'all ruined it) Black coffee favorite food is grilled cheese and tomato soup Basic bitch Loves AC/DC Classic rock Aerosexual Good at math Petty Strongly opinionated Bad at reading Needs glasses but refuses to get them Anger issues Can't cook

Toby

Clingy Manipulative attachment issues Likes chocolate milk Pyro Diet consists of milk, energy drinks, and random chips and snacks he can find Underweight but scarily strong Doesn't like spicy food Drools Nightmares Sleep paralysis Panic attacks Loves rodents Hates waking up early but he does because of his job Restless Draws on himself Lots of self-inflicted marks (IYKWIM) Ambidextrous Pyro Thinks about Lyra a lot Bites his nails when no one's around because he has to pull his mask down Listens to Mindless Self Indulgence, My Chemical Romance, Get Scared, Avril Lavigne, Theory of a dead man, Paramore, Sleeping with Sirens, Crown the Empire, Linkin Park, System of a Down, Panic! At the Disco, Melanie Martinez, Green Day, Black Veil Brides, Arctic Monkeys, McCafferty, Mother Mother, Fall Out Boy, Pierce the Veil, Falling in Reverse, Bring Me the Horizon, Three Days Grace, Korn, Slipknot, etc. (I had to) Hums to himself Dyslexic Likes abandoned areas Very fast when running Great aim Band T-shirts Taps foot Energy drinks

Eyeless Jack

Gentle giant Doesn't like being called "Eyeless Jack" Goes by E.J or Jack Loud breather in his mask, completely silent without Doesn't take his mask off unless he's alone Sweet Scared of himself Goes through heat Trust issues Good fashion but can't wear most clothes because of his size Has Brian sew/adjust/make him clothes for money or whatever Honest Has seen every single Disney movie Hums and sings along to the songs Fatherly Slender's second favorite Mature Scars Human food tastes bad to him Only drinks water Can and will pierce your body if you ask Misses icecream

Jeff

Energy drinks and soda cans all over his room Band T-shirts Emo Slender's favorite Plays with Ben (gaming) Sore loser Likes to burn things Caffeine addiction Stupid teenager shit 13 (in my hc) Ribs are visible Pierced body; nipples, ears, cartilage, nose Fights with everyone Dyes his hair regularly

Not Proofread

#creepypasta smut #creepypasta headcanon #hoodie #masky #ticci toby #marble hornets #jeff the killer #eyeless jack #x reader

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bigwishes · 6 months

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6, 9, 20, 31

6. Absolute Favourite TF Story?

this one is almost impossible for me to answer there are a tonne of stories I really like but to name a few. My favourite Ive mine I have personally written might be....Jun Gets Huge, Or Just a Bit Bigger or even Linkin it Big. I dunno i write a lot of stuff haha One of my favourites of others transforming me was Octusle's story where I put all the settings to max and was just made massive, or even Transformation4Life's story "Protein Makes the Body Grow Bigger" where a guy gets so massive the only thing he can wear is a skin tight poser.

9. All Good TFs Need to Have...?

For me a good draw / plot. It doesnt have to be expertly written to be great (hell I know some of my stuff is messy because I dont read and write good) but its gonna draw me in and get me invested and hold my attention.

20. What's Your Favourite TF Fantasy?

Haha, I swap this around a lot, often I find an image and get attached and spend ages fantasising about it until either I can get someone to write it for me or I write something using it or both but currently two fantasy situations have me drooling and wishing it would happen to me.

The first fantasy I have right now is there being a sample of 4 dark chocolate protein cupcakes at the gym, and after eating one deciding they taste good and taking the last 3 home with me eating them on the way and falling alseep when I get home only to wake up as a giant hunky black bro with a faint smell of musk.

only Im a lot more giant than I originally thought quickly realising I'm 11ft tall, built like a truck and that faint smell of musk is really an extremely potent stench of sweat that has all the weaker men dropping to their knees as I walk by unable to handle the stench.

and of course being so big having to eat a tonne of protein making me have a room shaking belch after I finish sculling a protein shake.

-- the second TF fantasy I'm currently thinking a lot about is more forced/tricked tf of going to the gym and being offered a new shake by a huge Asian hunk only for it to turn me into a hot Asian jock.

then after becoming obsessed with the size and muscle asking for another shake and swelling almost twice as big, growing bigger with every sip.

only to feel extremely uncomfortable and bloated belching as I lift, trying to get the pressure to go down. Being offered a 3rd shake but turning it down only for me to be forced to drink it, forced against my will to get bigger.

Becoming so bloated its visible, unable to say a full sentence without belching 6 or 7 times between each work. Way to big for a shirt and just being forced to become an absolute muscle slob.

but hey thats just me haha

31. Permanent Transformation?

Im not entirely sure what the question is asking me. If I wanna be Permanently Transformed or if I prefer transformations to be permanent in stories. to answer both, YES! I love when tf gets a guy what he wants but he gets too much and I love when he's stuck like that forever.

#male transformation #muscle #muscle transformation #male tf #tf story #transformation #musk #gay

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everfascinated · 11 months

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✲ Rules: shuffle your ‘on repeat’ playlist and post the first ten tracks, then tag ten people.

Thanks for the tag @toomanyacorns!!

Walking On A Dream - Empire of the Sun

Bleed It Out - Linkin Park

801 - The Aces

Steady, As She Goes - The Raconteurs

10,000 Emerald Pools - Børns

Crabbuckit - Good Lovelies

My Body - Young the Giant

come on come on - almost monday

When The Dreams Run Dry - The Killers

Danger Zone - Kenny Loggins

Tagging: @linklebard, @eddiethehunted, @awargoddess, @vassekocho, anyone else who wants to do it! Yes, you! Please tag me if you do just so I can see what songs you have :D

#music #tag game #I love tag games #I never know who to tag though lol #I'm a worrier #what if I tag someone and they hate getting tagged?#let me know if you want to be tagged #love tagging people who want to play #doing these tag games makes me realize #I haven't liked my fav international songs on spotify #missing a whole chunk of my stuff lol #lmao at these songs #I love them all but that last one took me out #called out

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tenderanarchist · 19 days

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Tagged by @dykefungus for my top 10 most played songs rn..

1. A Man Alone by Finch

2. Saying Sorry by Hawthorne Heights

3. Silhouette by Thrice

4. Cinnamon by Palehound

5. Papercut by Linkin Park

6. Medicinal Reality by From First to Last

7. CASTLE OF GLASS by Linkin Park

8. Walk it Off by Bayside

9. Giant’s Despair by One Step Closer

10. Visions by Bring Me The Horizon

Tagging @f4kef4ngs @butch-garfield @kradljivac-kostiju @agender-anomaly

#music #mutuals #tag game

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cadmium-free · 4 months

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City Limits: Explosion in the Paint Factory (Youtube/Spotify)

my attempt to take a lot of the music each of us shared while playing armour astir and make coherent listenable playlists. the listenability of this one is incredibly debatable. this one was in my notes for a long time just as "the fucked up and evil playlist"

We’ll Suck Forever - The Garages (May & Peta) | Pretty Fly (For A White Guy) - The Offspring (Dipthera) | Redesign your Logo - Lemon Demon (Vista Smithsonian) | Temporary Secretary - Paul McCartney (Matt Paint) | Doritos & Fritos - 100 Gecs (Room to Grow Teens) | En Slemmig Torsk - KSMB (Room to Grow Teens) | Lightning Strikes - Klaus Nomi (Agitant) | Man-Made Object - Lemon Demon (Vista Smithsonian) | Once in a Lifetime - Talking Heads (Papa Bombarello) | They Might Be Giants - I’ve Got A Fang | A Mask of My Own Face - Lemon Demon (The Nameless) | The Savers - Perry & Kingsley (Beep Snortz) | Numb (80s Remix) - Linkin Park (Papa Bombarello) | Prisencolinensinainciusol - Adriano Celentano | Fictional Aisle - Tall Boy Special (Venty) | Disco! In the Panic Room - Bug Hunter (Dewey Glen) | Tom Lehrer - We Will All Go Together When We Go

#city limits #untabled #music #recs #recs is doing a lot of work here when i've put We'll Suck Forever (great song) in with 80's Remix Numb

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mareenavee · 9 months

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OCs As Song Lyrics!

Hello. I love this. I was tagged by @thequeenofthewinter and @kookaburra1701

Tagging: @paraparadigm, @changelingsandothernonsense, @thana-topsy, @snippetsrus, @saltymaplesyrup, @orfeoarte, @rhiannon1199, @tallmatcha, @gilgamish, @archangelsunited, @inquisition-dragonborn, @elfinismsarts, @friend-of-giants, @miraakulous-cloud-district and whomsoever sees this that wants to do this game! Tag me, because I have actually tagged you. For reals. I want to see!

Rules, more or less, as I'm twisting them.

For your fic/current WIP, give us some lyrics that fit your OCS and NPCS-become-OCS perfectly. Do this for as many characters as you wish!

So. You want song lyrics for characters? I have them in spades. IN SPADES. I will give songs for just the character, not regarding any of their specific relationships. Below the cut for some beans in the jar that is The World on Our Shoulders!

Nyenna - Destroyer by Phantogram (Shinies for the corvids out there.)

Keep you here a while And if I'm never forgiven You can't say I didn't try I tried, I tried to save so many lives I guess my heart got carried away I guess the dark turned off the light Was there something that you wanted to say?

Teldryn - Easier to Run by Linkin Park (literally emo but can't catch me giving a shit lol)

Sometimes I remember the darkness of my past Bringing back these memories I wish I didn't have Sometimes I think of letting go and never looking back And never moving forward so there'd never be a past

Athis - Caught by Florence + The Machine (The exception to my statement it's not about relationships because this one was pretty defining in Athis's life in general.)

It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do To try and keep from calling you Well, can my dreams keep coming true? How can they? 'Cause when I sleep I never dream of you As if the dream of you, it sleeps too But it never slips away It just gains its strength and digs its hooks To drag me through the day

Varlais - L.G. FUAD by Motion City Soundtrack (Nope, can't catch me giving a shit about this rec either. It's too perfect lol.)

I'm a mess, I'm a wreck I am perfect, and I have learned to accept all my problems and short comings Because I am so visceral, yet deeply inept I want to thank you for being a part of my forget-me-nots and marigolds And all the things that don't get old Is it legal to do this? I surely don't know It's the only way I have learned to express myself around other peoples' descriptions of life I'm afraid I'm alone and entirely useless

#HELL YES I loved this.#Thank you for the tags #Tag game #MareenaWrites #The World on Our Shoulders #Nyenna #Teldryn Sero #Athis #Varlais #Linare Varlais #tes #tesblr #skyrim #skyrim fic #elder scrolls #fanficblr #writblr #writeblr

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lunarisings · 1 year

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A wee (giant) painting I did of Chester from Linkin Park 🖤🖤

#art #painting #canvas #acrylic painting #linkin park #music #nu metal #metal #emo #alternative #goth #chester bennington

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cleanlenins · 9 days

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hello lenn, I have a request:

I'm a student disk jockey (DJ) on the college radio, and I'm trying to figure out what regular people's music taste is. Any song recs please?

Friend of mine, my music taste is a bit odd, I think. Might not exactly be the most telling for people at large. Anyways, here is what I have been listening to lately.

Tarantella by Gabry Ponte, Kel

Everytime We Touch by Electric Callboy

oops! by Yung Gravy

Memphis Bass Pro Shop Pyramid by Ryan Hailey

The Communists Have The Music by They Might Be Giants

Pluto by Jake Wesley Rogers

Genesis by Otyken

Numnum Cat by The Kiffness

Plenty by aeseaes

Necromancin Dancin by Bear Ghost

The Silence by Morgan Clae

Also, anything by the Spice Girls or Linkin Park. They are always my top artists lol.

#lenn writes #asks #I am HONORED that you thought to ask me 💚💚💚💚💚💚

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radiofreederry · 11 months

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shuffle just followed they might be giants with linkin park

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lnights · 8 months

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Hello friend, from the very start you had my heart 🖤❤️. Thank you for joining the Dark Side and being a part of the BC Wolfpackfamily 🐺 here on Tumblr. Please remember that even the darkest days will end and Another Sun ☀️ will rise. Together we are never a Bad Idea but strong like Giants ✊️. #10yearsofblindchannel & many more to come!

Thank you ily 🥺🖤🖤🖤

Ok time to be ✨ emotional✨

I haven't really hid this but I was in a horrible place mentally when I first discovered BC, I ended up playing their music on a loop in the same way I used to Linkin Park when I was a teen, their music just spoke to me in a way I desperately needed at the time.

I ended up seeing a couple of their American tour vlogs and thought they were hilarious, I heard Niko mention fanfiction and decided to check out AO3.

I was hooked from my first fic. Thanks @chaoslaura for writing Paint me the sun, the moon, and the stars because I binged 11 chapters in one sitting and knew I had found a new fandom. And if you haven't read that fic, do it. Idk how many times I've reread it and I cry and laugh every time.

I had written before but had never posted and I worked up the courage by seeing how nice everyone was in the comments of other fics. I still expected some criticism but every comment was nice and encouraging. Especially from my bestie @wow-ihateithere

I stayed off of Tumblr for a couple months because I didn't want another social media site, but I ended up making an account to ask @outcastedang3l if it was ok for me to list their awesome fic Where My Heart Is as the inspiration for one I wrote and I've been here ever since 😂 you've all been so nice.

Also, same as above I reread that fic so much and everyone should do the same.

Even if the fandom shifts and expands to overlap with other fandoms or include more bands like Lost Society, Shriaz Lane, Electric Callboy, Bad Omens, MiW, etc, I'm glad for all my friends in my phone 🖤

I love you all 🖤🦇

Also shout-out to @anxious-bat @samyelbanette and @wow-ihateithere for meeting my awkward ass irl and still talking to me 😅

#im an awkward 🦇#10yearsofblindchannel #blindchannelfanweek2023

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fritextramole · 28 days

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after it all was filtered out

part 4 of an Eric van der Woodsen playlist - best heard in order

tracklist and quotes under the cut

Waiting For A Friend ~ The Pretty Reckless

Some people say life is like a lie Take it day by day, never knowing why My head is like a prison cell, I'm all by myself I'm waiting for my friend to come and break me out

John My Beloved ~ Sufjan Stevens

So can we pretend, sweetly Before the mystery ends? I am a man with a heart that offends With its lonely and greedy demands There’s only a shadow of me; in a matter of speaking, I'm dead

We Popped the Moon ~ Oliver Riot

I need you back I’ve found another way Oh, I’ve cracked

Waste ~ Oh Wonder

See a crack that I know All the corners of you All the bones that I knew I said I would never come back Screaming at the walls in jet black Hurt until my words are out flat Can I whisper it back?

Doomed ~ Moses Sumney

I feel you But nobody else Though you're someone I can't see Yet you say nothing Of the stoic suffering That stirs lukewarm in me If lovelessness is godlessness Will you cast me to the wayside? Well, I feel the peeling of half-painted ceilings Reveal the covering of a blank sky

The Only Thing ~ Sufjan Stevens

The only thing that keeps me from cutting my arm Cross hatch, warm bath, Holiday Inn after dark Signs and wonders: water stain riding the wall Daniel’s message; blood of the moon on us all Do I care if I despise this? Nothing else matters, I know In a veil of great disguises; how do I live with your ghost?

Swimming at Night ~ Camp Howard

I'm on my side I can't be blind Still, it's easy not to feel anything I want to dive into the night

Wet Cigarettes ~ Strawberry Milk Cult

You smell like wet cigarettes You look like you’ve felt regret I noticed long ago That you’ve always had that sadness in your eyes Like mine

You Wanted to Look for Help, I Wanted to Sit and Wait to be Rescued ~ Flatsound

Searching for how it felt Because all I want is to find myself in anyone And I wonder if it will ever come As easy as us giving up

Bedroom Window ~ The Pretty Reckless

As I look out of my bedroom window I see the chaos that's calling me So the wind blows wherever it will go It's all too much for me All of this emptiness I've been sharing It never comes when I want it to I can be anything I've forgiven Me and you, me and you

C’est La Mort ~ The Civil Wars

Heaven or Hell or somewhere in between Cross your heart to take me when you leave Don't go Please don't go Don't go without me

Heavy ~ Linkin Park, Kiiara

Holding on So much more than I can carry I keep dragging around what's bringing me down If I just let go, I'd be set free Holding on Why is everything so heavy?

Be Nice To Me ~ The Front Bottoms

But you're a killer And I'm your best friend Think it's unfair, your situation You say I'm changing Sorry, I didn't know I had to stay the same Could we talk about this later? Your voice is driving me, driving me insane

Tea, Milk & Honey ~ Oh Pep!

No space for time, no time for space I ain't got what the human race needs, no I won't contribute to your polluted transaction I've got places to be that ain't right here

Disorder ~ Joy Division

It's getting faster, moving faster now, it's getting out of hand On the tenth floor, down the back stairs, into no man's land Lights are flashing, cars are crashing, getting frequent now I've got the spirit, lose the feeling, let it out somehow

Sippy Cup ~ Melanie Martinez

Blood still stains when the sheets are washed Sex don't sleep when the lights are off Kids are still depressed when you dress them up And syrup is still syrup in a sippy cup

Lent ~ Autoheart

I don’t wanna, I don’t wanna be like this back then Yes, maybe, now it’s crazy We’re no good for one another, no, no, no I don’t wanna, I don’t wanna act like this You know I wanna be free I want to be free

9 Secret Steps ~ They Might Be Giants

Inhume your gloom within a tomb Confine your mind behind a line There's only doom outside your room Confine your mind behind a line

No Children ~ The Mountain Goats

I hope I cut myself shaving tomorrow I hope it bleeds all day long Our friends say it's darkest before the sun rises We're pretty sure they're all wrong

Finally Alone ~ Mac DeMarco

Sick of the city, locked in with all the pretty people You need a vacation Somewhere that no one ever would dream to go Somewhere mundane, hop on the train See where it goes

Smalltown Boy ~ Orville Peck

You leave in the morning with everything you own in a little black case Alone on a platform, the wind and the rain on a sad, lonely face Your mama will never understand why you had to leave But the answers you seek will never be found at home The love that you need will never be found at home

One by One ~ Matt Berry

One by one I wave them good bye Engineered To leave myself alone

First Day Of My Life ~ Bright Eyes

Remember the time you drove all night Just to meet me in the morning? And I thought it was strange, you said everything changed You felt as if you'd just woke up And you said, "This is the first day of my life I'm glad I didn't die before I met you But now I don't care, I could go anywhere with you And I'd probably be happy"

Malibu ~ Miley Cyrus

Hoping that you'll stay the same and nothing will change And it'll be us just for a while, do they even exist? That's when I make a wish to swim away with the fish 'Cause it's supposed to be this hot all summer long I never would've believed you if three years ago you told me

Sweet Tooth ~ Maya Hawke

Told my mother that I love her And that I'd lie to the accountant if she wants I'll do whatever to protect her I'll say anything just to make her stop

#gg #ggplaylists #eric van der woodsen #gossip girl #source: senamarais #tw self harm #the characters who left early (eric. jenny. vanessa) are only getting 4 posts so bye eric!

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