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runnning-outof-time · 9 months

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Worth Breaking Plans For | Tommy Shelby x Reader

Request: yes by anonymous

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x reader

Summary: Tommy Shelby never thought he'd willingly go to see a ballet…that was until he found out that (Y/N) was performing in one. (Y/N) (Y/L/N) never thought she was someone worth breaking plans for…that was until Tommy came into her life.

Warnings: drinking and one bad word

Word Count: 4238

A/N: I’ve got another long one for ya here…the words just wouldn’t stop haha. This one was super fun to write. I hope I added enough ballerina elements for you, anon. If you haven’t got your fill by the end of it though, @padfootdaredmetoo has an amazing ballerina!reader series that you should check out! Enjoy! :)

PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!

Comment/Message me if you’d like to be tagged in future stories similar to this one!

(Y/N) just barely had the time to take in her surroundings before she was having a flute of champagne thrust in her direction. "Here," the drink was accompanied by the words of her friend, Lou, "have a few of these and you'll be settled in in no time."

"Thank you," (Y/N) gingerly replied, accepting the glass and bringing it up to her lips so that she could take a sip of the bubbly liquid. She then smiled at her friends, who were intently watching for any microexpression she would share with them. "It's good," she told them, feeling a little silly for even saying that in the first place.

"Good," Julia affirmed, a smile present on her face as she watched her friend take another sip, "let's get into this party now!" she cheered, taking hold of (Y/N)'s hand so that she, and Lou, could lead her deeper into the establishment.

(Y/N) took that time to look around in awe. She hadn't attended many of these parties - as if that hadn't been obvious enough - and was eager to soak in every aspect of it that she could. Spending time with a few friends from her company at either her flat or a smaller venue was more her speed, but that didn't mean she wasn't excited to see the other half of the spectrum.

"Did you hear what Lou said, (Y/N)?" the sound of Julia's voice broke into her thoughts, making her focus on her friends again.

"I'm sorry, I didn't," she admitted, a sheepish smile present on her face. They'd been here for a handful of minutes now and yet there were details of the venue and revelry that she still hadn't caught onto. She didn't feel too bad for being lost in the atmosphere of it all.

"I was saying that I've gotten word about there being some rather prominent figures at this party," Lou repeated herself, a grin forming on her face.

"Prominent in what sense?" (Y/N) couldn't help but ask. She had a right to, considering that she and her two friends were members of one of the most prestigious ballet companies that ran in London and its surrounding areas. Technically they could be considered part of the 'prominent figures' being talked about.

"I've heard everything from entertainers, to politicians, and even..." Julia trailed off, glancing around before she leaned closer to the other two women, her grin growing as she went to finish off her statement, "gangsters."

"Why did you say it in that way?" (Y/N) couldn't help but giggle at her friend's delivery of the word.

"Because the thought of it is so utterly...interesting," Julia responded.

“And exhilarating,” Lou added.

"Wouldn’t it be fun to meet a gangster?" Julia finished off with a question, making Lou nod, a giddy grin present on her face as she added a few more words of agreement.

"Hmm...I suppose," (Y/N) aired more on the coy side of things, looking out at the sea of people that were attending the party. She found it slightly hard to believe that there were actual gangsters scattered amongst these innocent looking party-goers. Maybe it'd only be those fake kinds...like the ones you'd see in the pictures.

"Come on ladies, let's find ourselves a gangster!" Julia cheered, obviously not letting the distinction bog her mind down. She clapped her hands together before leading the other two even further into the venue.

(Y/N) took that time to do some more looking around, her eyes dancing from the band, to the extravagant decorations, to the many people who seemed to be having the time of their lives. Amidst the looking, her eyes stopped on a man...one who immediately stood out from the rest of the people she'd been watching so far. She couldn't help but let her eyes linger on him for a longer amount of time. He just looked so...interesting, for lack of better words, and she found herself entranced by him.

She let her eyes linger on him until Lou broke into her thoughts - yet again - this time going on about seeing a familiar face that she wanted to go speak to. So with slight dismay, she broke her stare and followed her friends.

"Ada Thorne! It really is you!" Lou exclaimed as the three women approached another one, who had brown hair and a well-dressed figure.

"Lou! It's so good to see you!" the woman replied in a similar fashion to the initial greeting, a wide smile forming on her face. "Goodness, you've brought friends as well," she added, her eyes focusing on the other two ladies.

"Yes, I have," Lou answered with a smile, "this is Julia and (Y/N), they're both in the same company as me," she then went about the introductions.

"It's nice to meet you ladies. Lou always goes on and on about the women she performs with...it's so nice to finally put some faces to the stories," Ada said, smiling as she spoke.

"So how have things been with you?" Lou then moved to the small talk portion of the conversation, her eyebrows raised as she awaited a response.

(Y/N) figured that she didn't really need to be a part of the conversation anymore, so she happily went back to people watching. Much to her upset, she couldn't find the man she'd been fixated on earlier, no matter how hard she looked for him. That didn't mean that she didn't still enjoy taking in her surroundings once more.

She stayed locked into her own world until the feeling of Julia jabbing her side brought her out of it. "Goodness, what's that for?" she asked her friend, her eyes snapping to the other woman as she sent her a glare.

"You've been in your own world while we're being introduced to someone here," she hissed, nodding her head to the left to indicate that someone else had joined the group in the meantime.

(Y/N) was a bit nervous to look, feeling bashful all of a sudden for not having proper party manners. But she had to look, because it quickly became apparent that the conversation wasn't going on without it. So she did, and the sight that was awaiting her made her mouth go dry in seconds. Standing before her was the man...the one that she'd been transfixed on earlier. She suddenly hoped that her jaw hadn't gone slack at the realization as she scrambled to think of something to say.

"You'll have to forgive me...I like to take in my surroundings whenever I'm able to," she said to the man, a sheepish smile forming on her face.

"All is forgiven," the man brushed her apology off without second thought. The gruffness in his voice moved her in ways that she truly hadn't been moved before. That, coupled with the intensity of his ocean blue eyes that were currently focused on her, made her feel like her knees could give out at any moment.

"My name's (Y/N). (Y/N) (Y/L/N)," (Y/N) then decided to introduce herself, figuring that the group had already gotten past that step and was waiting for her to catch up.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, (Y/N)," the man said with a slight, greeting-typed nod before continuing, "my name's Tommy. Tommy Shelby," he then offered up his name, along with his hand for her to shake.

"Pleasure to meet you as well, Tommy," she responded to him, accepting the handshake with a kind smile.

"Tommy's my brother," Ada then entered the conversation, making (Y/N) remember that there were others around her, and that she wasn't just standing by herself with this man. "He says he's in town on business, but I think he's come to keep tabs on me," she added, a grin forming on her face as she took a playful jab at her sibling.

"It's nice to meet you, Tommy," Julia offered a greeting similar to (Y/N)'s, which made her wonder if maybe introductions hadn't been completed yet.

"These ladies all belong to one of the finest ballet companies this city has to offer," Ada then gave her brother some more information on the women he'd just been introduced to, her words making Lou playfully chide her.

Small talk re-commenced then, and (Y/N) tried to stay with it for the sake of not making another awkward mistake. She found it hard to be completely focused though, because no matter what she did, she couldn't quite keep her eyes off of Tommy.

——

"Well this is a surprise," Ada remarked when she opened the door to find her brother on the other side of it.

"Do you have plans for this evening?" Tommy asked, deciding to skip the greetings and get to the reason he was standing outside her door.

"I don't," Ada, thankfully, answered without much thought, "is there something you need me for?"

"I need you to come with me," Tommy continued, fishing his watch out of its pocket so that he could make sure he was still on time.

"Where?" now she was answering like the Ada he knew.

"There's a show going on at the theatre...I wanted to go to it and figured you'd might want to come," he gave her some vague details.

"And what is this show exactly?" she asked, tilting her head to the side in a questioning manner.

"Just come with me, Ada," he answered in a dismissive tone, not exactly wanting to play twenty questions at this moment.

Ada pursed her lips, not happy that her brother was being abrupt with her. She took a few moments to think his proposal over, secretly loving how the wait was driving him crazy. "I'll come," she finally agreed to his plan, "just let me make sure that Karl can be watched first," she added, turning and going back into the house to find that live-in nanny and tell her that she was going out.

—

"I never thought there'd come a day where Tommy Shelby would willingly go to a ballet," Ada commented with a smirk as she and Tommy found their seats in the front row of the upper balcony. She'd been sending these little jabs his way since she got the program and realized what show he was bringing them to.

"Ada," Tommy spoke in a warning tone, having heard enough of her teasing.

"Fine, I'll stop," she conceded, although she was trying her best to withhold her giggles.

Tommy just shook his head and turned his attention to the stage's curtains. He could see from the corner of his eye that Ada had opened the program and started flipping through it. He was thankful that she'd now found something else to do. But he wasn't out of the woods just yet.

"Which of the ladies is it?" she asked after a few minutes had passed, her words making him turn to look at her with furrowed brows. "Of the women we met at the party...which one is it?" she added more clarification.

Tommy went to speak, but the house lights dimming stopped - saved - him from having to answer. A round of applause coursed through the theatre as the curtains were pulled aside and the performance began. Tommy spent the next hour or so keeping his eyes fixed on the woman he hadn't been able to rid his mind of since he last saw her at the party.

—

"Oh my, this is so lovely," (Y/N) cooed as she accepted the single flower and hand-drawn picture from one of the girls that had come backstage to meet her, "thank you so much!"

"I drew the picture myself," the girl boasted, her words making (Y/N) look at the picture to see that there were two ballerinas drawn on it: one bigger and one smaller. "I want to be a ballerina one day when I grow up," the girl added, a toothy smile forming on her face.

"You keep practicing and you may just be on stage with us one day," (Y/N) told her, an encouraging smile present on her face.

The group of girls said their goodbyes then, their mothers calling them back over so that they could leave. That was when (Y/N) looked up to see a familiar figure leaning against the wall not too far away. The breath got stuck in her throat as she became focused on him; feeling the exact same feelings she'd experienced at the party. Goodness, he just had this aura to him.

"Tommy," she hated that she said his name a little too eagerly, "I...I would have never expected to see you here," she couldn't help but voice her surprise.

"I was in town and figured I'd come to see a show," he brushed her statement off with a slight shrug of his shoulders after he pushed himself off of the wall to move closer to her.

"Did you come alone?" she just had to ask.

"No, Ada came as well. She went off to find your friend...Lou, I believe it was," he answered, glancing down at the items she was holding then. "Had I known you were accepting gifts, I would have brought one," he said, motioning to the flowers and bears she had in her arms.

"Oh no...that's not necessary," she brushed him off, trying to ignore the giddy feeling she was now getting in her stomach.

"You did well," he complimented her performance, tucking his hands into his pockets as he spoke.

"Thank you," (Y/N) accepted the compliment with a smile. She looked down at the things she was holding then, feeling the heat rise within her more with each second that they held eye contact.

"You know..." Tommy started, clearing his throat before continuing, "you should at least let me take you for a drink; since I came here empty-handed."

His words brought (Y/N)'s eyes back up to his in a flash, and he most certainly caught the look of surprise she was wearing before she tried hard to hide it. "Oh you don't have to do that," she tried to brush his offer off.

"No, I insist," he held steady, "it'd be a way to celebrate a successful show...my first ballet," he added, the final words of his sentence making her let out a stifled laugh.

"You're truly offering?" she checked with him before giving her final answer.

"I am," he nodded, a smile playing on his lips.

She had to bite back the smile that was threatening to form as she took a moment's pause. If she answered too soon, it would have looked like she was overly excited for this opportunity. "I'd like that then," she told him, hoping that her giddiness wasn't plastered clear across her face. "I need to quickly put these in the dressing room," she added, raising her arms slightly to call attention to the gifts she'd been holding.

"I'll be waiting here," he told her, nodding as she turned and walked towards the dressing rooms.

She was unable to get to them without being stopped by Julia first. "Is that the man from the party, (Y/N)?" her friend asked, her eyes swapping between (Y/N) and Tommy.

"It is," (Y/N) answered, again hoping that her giddiness wasn't too apparent.

"What's he doing here?"

"He's offered to take me for drinks," (Y/N) couldn't help but feel proud as she spoke.

A grin spread across Julia's face as she heard her friend's response, "oh so it's like that?" she questioned, wiggling her eyebrows.

"Not exactly like that," (Y/N) was quick to brush her off, "he's just being kind."

"You'll have to tell me all about it at rehearsals tomorrow...we'll see how kind he ended up being," Julia stated, winking as she put emphasis on the word 'kind'.

"It's not like that, Julia!" (Y/N) insisted, her eyebrows raised as she stressed her point in a harsh whisper.

"Don't keep your man waiting." (Y/N)'s statement was ignored, and Julia's grin only grew as she spoke, ending off with giving the other woman a friendly push towards the dressing room.

(Y/N) let out a huff as she went to quickly put the gifts she'd received down. She then hurried to get changed out of her costume before grabbing her things and heading out of the dressing room. Tommy was standing right where she left him, and she sent him a smile as she approached him. He asked her if she was ready, and she nodded, allowing the two to leave the theatre and go wherever they'd be having drinks.

—

Conversation came easily between the two as they settled in at the bar of one of the more prestigious clubs in the city. (Y/N) would have loved to look around and get lost in her surroundings but, well...she had more interesting things to look at.

They learned a good bit about each other as they sat and talked. (Y/N) told Tommy all about her rise to the company that she was dancing for now, and Tommy in turn told (Y/N) of how he made his way out of Birmingham, coming from nothing to now dealing with some of the heads of the business sphere. He also made hints at some other avenues that he's simultaneously working in, but didn't really elaborate on them. (Y/N) truly didn't need details though...she'd become so enthralled by this man that she was sure it'd take something dire to make her want to leave him.

So enthralled, in fact, that she did something that would be considered rather bold by her standards and invited him back to her flat for a nightcap. Tommy, who was also enjoying himself, accepted the invitation with no hesitation, then going to pay off their tab so that they could leave the club for the building she lived in.

Things transitioned more than smoothly to her flat. The shift in the energy between them became increasingly more noticeable the closer they got to the building, and neither said a word as they rode the elevator up to her floor, instead choosing to let their eyes do the talking as they held each other's gazes.

If she was being honest, (Y/N) couldn't wait much longer to get him behind the privacy of her door. The second she did, her hands found the lapels of his suit jacket so that she could bring him to her and press their lips together in a haste kiss. Tommy accepted it with a matched eagerness, holding her tight to his body as he deepened it.

"I'm sorry...that was a bit forward of me," (Y/N) panted once they'd pulled away. She couldn't mask the bashfulness that was coming on once her mind caught up to her actions.

"Don't apologize," Tommy told her, taking a chance to take in her features at this new closeness, "I quite liked it." A slight laugh left her lips as he finished speaking, one that sounded like music to his ears.

"Would you like something to drink?" she asked him then.

"Sure."

(Y/N) nodded before she glanced down to where she was still gripping his lapels. She exhaled a breath of a laugh before releasing them and smoothing them back to their previous state. Tommy let go of her waist then, and she quickly turned to head to the kitchen so that he wouldn't see her frown at the loss of contact. He followed her to the kitchen, not really wanting to leave her side either.

"Did you enjoy the performance today?" she asked him as she grabbed a bottle and two glasses.

"I did," he answered after having to recall how the night started. It felt like it happened so long ago at this point. "You didn't have much of a part in it though," he pointed out then.

"Yeah," she answered, a bit of a lopsided smile present as she went about pouring the drinks. "I did audition for the lead in our next show though..." she paused, sliding one glass towards him before she looked up with a smile, "and I got the part!" she couldn't help but voice her happiness to this man she'd only met a week ago.

"Yeah? When is the show?" he asked, genuine curiosity present in his voice.

"It's in two weeks. On the twentieth," a fire started to burn in her stomach at the thought of him coming to see her perform again.

"Fuck," he breathed as he looked down at the glass.

This was a response she was not expecting, and it confused her. "What? Is something wrong?" she asked, all of the excitement now gone.

"I'll be out of town that day, on business," he told her, his simple sentence effectively breaking her heart. Why had she gotten her hopes up?

"Oh," she couldn't help but voice her upset, glancing up at him before she took a drink.

She looked at him again as she set the glass down on the counter, trying not to let this turn of events spoil what had been an otherwise amazing evening. Hell, she had this insanely handsome man in her flat...who was she to stand around and mope over something she couldn't control? Tommy was taking that time to look her over too, and she couldn't help but love the feeling of his eyes on her.

"We still have tonight though..." she spoke again after a few moments had passed, keeping her eyes steady on him, watching his every move.

He let his eyes trail over her face again, taking in every inch of it. He licked his lips as he thought about the magnitude of her statement. "We do have tonight," he answered then, letting her lead the interaction.

She couldn't stop from biting on her bottom lip as she thought of how to word her next question. The energy coursing between them was almost palpable at this point, and she wondered how she was able to shift so quickly from disappointment to desire just by standing in his presence. It felt like ages before she spoke again, a hint of curiosity now sparkling in her eyes: "would you like to come to bed with me?"

Tommy didn't wait ages to give his response. He broke the distance between them in seconds, his hands finding the sides of her face so that he could pull her into a deep kiss.

The kiss alone buried the upset of him not being able to attend her performance, and if it was a precursor of what would come, (Y/N) knew that this would be a night she'd hold in her mind for years to come.

——

(Y/N) hadn't had a moment to herself since she exited the stage after final bows. She was being swarmed by the fellow ballerinas in her company, who were congratulating her on a wonderful show and already celebrating their collective performance. She didn't mind it though...she was buzzing from the high herself.

"You have a few fans waiting out in the hall to see you, Miss (Y/L/N)," one of the stagehands told her once she'd finished the conversation she was having.

(Y/N) nodded and allowed the man to lead her to the door that separated the backstage area from the rest of the theatre. He opened the door for her and she thanked him before seeing the same group of little girls that had been at her last show waiting for her. She greeted them with a wide smile, happily accepting their flowers and other gifts that they came back to bring her. After many hugs and a short conversation, she said goodbye and some words of encouragement.

Standing tall again, she looked ahead of her and found the last person she expected to. Tommy Shelby was there, leaning against the wall much like he had last time, but now he had a bouquet of beautiful red roses with him. (Y/N) went over to him without a second thought.

"I brought you flowers this time," he was the first to speak, raising the bouquet slightly to accentuate his statement.

"You...you did," she stuttered out, still not quite believing her eyes, "were...were you...?" She couldn’t get a complete sentence out. Not once in the times they’d met up over the last two weeks did he mention he was able to make it to her show - they hadn’t spoken about it after that night.

"I was," he answered with a slight chuckle, a smile forming on his lips at her shock.

"Please tell me you didn't cancel your plans for me."

"I did," he confirmed what she already knew, "you're worth breaking plans for, love."

The widest smile formed on her face at his statement, and she couldn't help but close the distance to wrap her arms around his neck in a tight hug. He chuckled at her reaction, holding onto her as tightly as she was holding him. "You did amazing," he mumbled into her neck before pressing a kiss to it.

"I'm happy you came," she said, holding back her emotions with a smile as she pulled away, "so happy," she added, her hands moving to his face so that she could kiss him.

Even though she’d just given what was surely the best performance of her career, (Y/N) couldn’t deny that she’d never felt happier than she did at this moment.

Tagged: @mystcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @lilyrachelcassidy @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @onlydeadcells @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @midnightmagpiemama @cillmequick @rangerelik @dandelionprints @letal-y-poetica @itscheybaby @gypsy-girl-08 @insanitybyanothername @depxiety @raincoffeeandfandoms @dragons-are-my-favorite @acewritesfics @forgottenpeakywriter @cljordan-imperium @areyenotfondofmelobster @little-diable @thomashelbyswife @iambored24601 @shaddixlife

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elyvorg · 8 months

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The Real Reason That Sissel Refused to Help

(or: the subtle genius of Ghost Trick’s tutorial)

“I just want to find my own lost memory. I’m sorry, but I can’t help you.”

Here’s a post in which I talk about this particular part of Ghost Trick’s story, which I’m keeping as vague as possible outside of the spoiler cut, but those who’ve finished the game should know what I’m referring to. What’s actually going on here is rather interesting, and paints our friend Sissel in a much less negative light than the face-value assumption I tend to see most people jumping to with this.

First, though, I have written a fic illustrating this idea in narrative form rather than lengthily explaining it. If you’re interested, I recommend you go read that first before reading this, because being shown is more fun than being told!

(Also, spoilers, obviously. Go play Ghost Trick if you haven’t; it’s so good and absolutely not the kind of thing you want to be spoiled for.)

So, in the original timeline, Sissel refused to help Missile save his mistresses, stating that he just wants to find his own lost memories.

It could easily seem at a glance like Sissel’s character development over the course of the game is that he started off selfish, only caring about his own mystery, and it’s only through getting attached to everyone throughout the night that he begins to care about others and the bigger picture. As such, his refusal to help Missile in the original timeline is easy to read as being born of that, since this was early on when Sissel still only cared about himself.

But… it’s not actually that simple, because Sissel isn’t as selfish in the beginning as one might think. Sure, he’ll say things like “I have to focus on my own mystery”, or “this is all for my own benefit”. But that doesn’t actually match up with his actions. His own mystery may be, in theory, his number one priority, but a remarkably close second priority for him is to save the lives of any dead person he happens to come across. Even very early on, before he’s grown to care about any of these people!

He doesn’t hesitate to save Missile, despite having zero reason to assume that this little doggie will be any help with his mystery. The second time he finds Lynne dead, when he’s getting to talk to her and learns that she doesn’t actually know much about him and probably won’t be able to help him because she’s got her own case to pursue tonight, he still reassures her that she doesn’t owe him and he’s going to save her life anyway.

And even right at Lynne’s very first death, in the game’s opening narration, Sissel makes a point that he doesn’t want to stand back and let her get shot, and that he feels bad for her, despite her being a complete stranger!

Evidently, even right at the beginning, Sissel isn’t selfish. He just thinks he is. Because cats can be tsundere like that.

Sissel: “Why am I so determined to save this woman? After all, it’s not as if I know her. My reason is twofold. Number one, I’m not the type to leave women lying around, discarded like trash.”

(Here’s a bit from later in chapter 1 featuring Sissel being amusingly surprised by his own altruistic streak. He seems to expect to only care about himself – yet here he is, not wanting to leave a stranger lying dead if he can help it. Not so selfish after all, huh?)

So if that’s not the problem in the original timeline, then what is? Why does Sissel leave Missile to deal with saving his ladies alone when he’d have no reason not to try and help? – after all, he hasn’t been given a fake time limit in this timeline! He’s not even in a hurry with his own mystery! For that matter, Sissel was still there in the junkyard at the beginning – why didn’t he just save Lynne himself?

We can get a good indication of what the issue is from that very same opening narration I was just talking about.

Sissel: “Now, I’m not the kind of guy who can just stand back and watch a poor woman get shot. But I have just one little problem… I’m already dead myself.”

Sissel: “I feel bad for her, sure. But what can I do? I’m dead. But just as I was thinking that…”

The real problem is not that he doesn’t care about saving a stranger’s life. Rather, it’s that, because he’s dead, he doesn’t think he can. He’s not expecting to magically have ghost superpowers; why would he?

And it’s just as he was thinking that he can’t do anything (which, while part of his screen-filling monologue narration, was still his thoughts and therefore something any nearby ghost could hear)… that Ray speaks up to tell him that actually he can save her.

Sissel: “Huh?” (Me? Save her? Uh, how?)

Immediately, Sissel questions the notion once again, not with a why but with a how. It’s not that he doesn’t want to; he simply doesn’t think it’s possible.

This general idea continues throughout the entire tutorial, which is absolutely packed with lines that show Sissel being deeply sceptical about the idea that he could possibly save someone’s life or alter someone’s fate.

Once Ray’s taught him about his basic ghost tricks and he’s managed to delay Lynne’s death by a few moments… she still ends up dead anyway. And Sissel thinks that’s it. Because of course he does. Even if he can stop time and manipulate objects, he has zero reason to believe that his powers can undo a death that’s already happened.

Sissel: “In the end, it looks like her fate remains unchanged. So what good are these ‘ghost tricks’ of mine? But just as I was thinking this…”

Sissel: “It looks like my ghost tricks didn’t do much good.” (She still ended up just as dead as before.)

He even ends up feeling like his new superpowers are barely worth anything, because he can play a few little tricks on someone, but that’s not enough to save someone’s life, is it?

Ray: “Isn’t it a shame to see such a pretty young woman lying here discarded like a piece of trash?” Sissel: “But what can I do? She’s already dead.”

Ray: “And while she’s resting, you can save her life.” Sissel: “Oh, sure. You make it sound so easy.”

And again, he’s very dismissive of Ray implying or telling him that he can do something about this. After all, how could that be possible any more?

In particular, there’s this vital little bit of trickery here…

Ray: “Now what do you suppose will happen if you possess a corpse?” Sissel: “Nothing, because I already tried that, remember? And nothing happened at all.”

…in which Sissel assumes his powers just don’t work on corpses, because he’s already tried and failed to do anything with “his” corpse. If he’d been alone, without Ray to guide him through things, he most likely wouldn’t have even tried to possess Lynne’s corpse in the first place, because he would have had no reason to believe it would achieve anything!

(Meanwhile, Missile in the original timeline also had zero reason to believe he could do anything for Kamila, but he was so anguished and desperate that of course he would have tried anyway. He’d try anything to save her, because he is good and loyal and Dog. So he was able to discover his time-rewinding powers where Sissel didn’t, and thus he passed that knowledge onto Sissel in the game’s timeline.)

And as Ray tells Sissel that he can in fact rewind time to redo the last moments of Lynne’s life, he’s completely dumbfounded and bewildered by the very idea of it.

Sissel: “Are you serious?! Back through time?!”

Sissel: “But this is crazy! None of it makes any sense!”

Ray: “To the time four minutes before this woman was murdered!” Sissel: “H-Hey, wait a second! I still don’t know what you’re talking about!”

What is this lamp even talking about?! Of course turning back time isn’t possible! He had no reason to believe it was possible, even as part of his new wacky ghost powers.

(Meanwhile, when Sissel is saving Missile in the game, we get a little exchange that shows Missile being completely unfazed by the idea that Sissel’s brought them back in time. It’s no weirder than humans walking around on two legs, right? One way or another, the cat can barely wrap his head around it, while the dog sees it as perfectly plausible.)

One thing Ray says more than once during the tutorial is, “The best thing to do is try it.” Because Sissel is being so stubbornly cynical that he will not take this desk lamp’s word about how useful his powers are and has to literally be pushed into trying it himself in order to believe it, every time.

Even after seeing for himself that he can go back in time and watch Lynne’s death again, Sissel still manages to be pessimistic about this.

Ray: “And there you have it. The last four minutes of her life.” Sissel: [strained] “No…!” Ray: “It’s kind of ironic, when you think about it. A woman toyed with by fate, and a man toyed with by a ghost.” Sissel: “But she still died.”

He went back in time, and she still died. There’s still apparently nothing he can do, right? No, Sissel, just have a bit of patience! This is just the mechanic that lets you understand what happens before you dive in and start changing things; you’ll get your chance soon!

And once he’s finally successfully saved Lynne…

Ray: “You used your powers to avert that woman’s fate.” Sissel: “So I did that?”

Sissel still has a moment of being surprised at the notion that he was capable of something like this.

It’s really striking to me, watching over chapter 1 again with this thought about original-timeline Sissel in mind, just how many lines to this effect there are throughout the whole thing. The writers did not need to include this many moments of Sissel being sceptical, or even any of them at all, really, in order for the tutorial to do its job as a tutorial! But they’re here anyway, because it is in fact really important to the story that Sissel is somebody who would not have tried hard enough to figure out that his powers can undo deaths unless he had someone holding his hand through it the whole way.

The way old-Missile talks about it when he’s explaining himself at the end, it’s easy to get the takeaway that the most important thing he did as Ray was to take advantage of Sissel’s supposed self-interest: by not contradicting his misconception that he’s the man in red, by telling him Lynne is the key to his mystery (a half-truth at best), and by giving him a fake time limit. And it’s not that those things didn’t help, but they’re not really the most important thing at all.

The most important thing Ray did for Sissel, the thing that Missile absolutely most needed to spend those ten years waiting to do, was exactly what it appeared to be during chapter 1: to teach him how to use his powers to save lives. Because the number one thing the Sissel from the original timeline needed but didn’t get was, quite literally, a tutorial.

There’s a little bit more to it than this, though. So, okay, Sissel in the original timeline didn’t know he had the vital time-rewinding power. But then that begs the question: why didn’t Missile just tell him that while asking for his help?

For that matter, why did Sissel leave Missile shortly after being asked for help? It can’t just be because he urgently had to go and look elsewhere for answers to his own mystery, because he’s not pressed for time here. And he was apparently chilling at the junkyard just eavesdropping on the investigators’ conversations before Missile showed up. Why the sudden shift in locations now of all times, when there’s someone here who’s actually talking to him – the first person Sissel would have been able to talk to all night – and asking him for help?

The issue here, I believe, is that this isn’t just a matter of Sissel’s lack of understanding what his powers can do. It’s also a matter of emotional state – both Sissel’s, and Missile’s. Both of them would have been incredibly stressed out and upset, Sissel due to his loss of memory and seeing deaths in front of him that he doesn’t think he can do anything about, and Missile due to his mistresses’ deaths that he also can’t do anything about, even though he has a superpower that lets him try but it just isn’t quite enough.

How would Missile and Sissel’s interaction go when they’re both so upset like this? There’s actually a fun little bite-sized example of this in the actual canon timeline. During the last desperate struggle to escape the sinking submarine…

Missile: “Sissel! Y-Y-Y… You’re not telling Miss Lynne to leave poor Miss Kamila behind, ARE YOU?!” Sissel: *sigh* “Could you just be quiet for a minute, Missile?”

Missile and Sissel are bound to be both extremely anxious and stressed in this situation – trapped in the submarine, Lynne and Kamila in danger of drowning if they don’t do something. And in that state of mind, it seems that Missile is prone to eschewing logic to be even more loudly desperately protective of his mistresses… while Sissel especially does not enjoy Missile being Loudly Boisterously Dog in his ear when he’s stressed out. After all, cats and dogs have very opposite and very incompatible ways of dealing with stress!

So it follows that the conversation between Sissel and Missile in the original timeline would likely have been an incoherent emotional mess, in which neither of them properly communicated their side of things at all. Missile must have just never even thought to tell Sissel that he can rewind time and therefore saving his ladies is actually possible in theory, because that was already obvious to him! He wouldn’t be capable of understanding why Sissel would be so reluctant about this.

As for why Sissel wasn’t just reluctant to help but outright ran away and sealed the deal – I think, more than anything, it’s got to be down to the fact that he couldn’t stand having Missile being so loud and energetic at him when he was this upset. Especially not while repeatedly saying that he can save them, which would be the exact thing Sissel has been miserably convinced that he just can’t. It follows that he’d just have wanted to run and hide somewhere Missile isn’t, where he can have some peace and quiet. Cats who are upset often like to hide and isolate themselves to feel safer.

There’s one other part in the game’s tutorial that suggests the problem originally might have been partly a matter of Sissel’s emotions:

Ray: “Hello there. How are you feeling? Not very well, I imagine. A terrible tragedy, what happened tonight.” Sissel: “………” [neutral face] Ray: “Ah, ignoring me, are you? It’s a little too early for you to be so stiff and cold, I’d say.” Sissel: [smiling] “Ah, so it was you. You were that voice in my head, right?”

This is very noteworthy, because Ray is the only person in the entire game who ever takes the time to ask Sissel how he’s feeling. He wouldn’t be feeling great after waking up dead, watching a woman die in front of him and failing to save her, would he?

It seems like old-Missile, with his years of wisdom and time to reflect on everything, realised that his approach to getting Sissel’s help last time really was way too focused on his own problems, and he never even stopped to think about how Sissel must have been feeling. So here, he presents himself as a friend, someone who cares about Sissel and his journey, because that’s exactly what Sissel needs! This poor kitty must have felt so lonely and sad and helpless in the original timeline. But hearing Ray’s words, and realising that this desk lamp is someone semi-familiar, does seem to cheer him up at least a little bit here! Sissel really is a character whose core desperate need is to just not be alone, even if you’d be hard-pressed to get him to admit that at the beginning.

Interestingly, way back when I first played Ghost Trick, on the DS soon after it came out, I found myself intrigued by Sissel in the original timeline. I vaguely toyed with the idea of writing a fic exploring how he was feeling and why he refused, though I never got around to actually doing so. Then recently, the game coming out in HD rekindled my hyperfixation and made me think about it some more and actually end up writing that fic after all. And the thing is, back then, I didn’t remotely consciously understand any of this stuff I’ve just explained here. But even so, I find it neat how I still had this wordless sense that what was going on with Sissel must have been so much more than just selfishness – that he must have been so sad in that timeline and that had to be the real basis of why he didn’t help.

#ghost trick #ghost trick phantom detective #ghost trick spoilers #sissel #sissel ghost trick #ray ghost trick #ramble

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cosmic-glow · 8 months

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Can i ask a story with Kakashi Hatake accidentally talking to the reader who likes her but doesn't know how talk with her? like drunk confession

Notes: YES! I don't know why I like writing about drunk characters so much... maybe that's a little worrying... But this turned out so cute and honeyed, I really hope you like it, good reading!

"A Good Reason to be Drunk" - Oneshot.

Warnings: Kakashi x fem!reader; mentions of alcohol and drunkenness (obviously); small plot at the end; SFW; Kakashi in love💕

There was no shortage of warnings about how difficult the journey of becoming a jonin is, and indeed it is, but you were aware of this when you decided to become one. What you weren't aware of was that the person who would train you until you had experience was a big slacker who would leave all the work to you.

You heard a lot about Kakashi, the ninja who copies, while you was studying and training to become a jonin. But what you were never told was that he was late for every appointment, procrastinated on mission paperwork, slept whenever he could and left all the hard work to his teammate. You couldn't deny that he was indeed very skilled during fights, but his behavior didn't make up for it.

And here you were, sitting on a sofa in a bar, drinking sake with your already drunk colleague beside you, leaning on your shoulder and smiling idly. Kakashi irritated you very easily and sometimes you didn't even know why.

But at the same time, he had already saved you so many times during fights, intervening when you believed that all was lost, he taught you so many things that weren't in the books, he compensated you for the hokage's scoldings, taking the blame for any mistake in the mission ... In the end you were a good pair, it was just his lazy side that got on your nerves sometimes. Actually, come to think of it, it was even an honor to train with a ninja like him, you just didn't want to admit it.

After all, in addition to the reputation of being a very skilled ninja, he also had the reputation of being a "stealer of hearts", there weren't a few women who said they were in love with him, maybe you were just wanting to focus on some of his defects so as not to let yourself be carried away by the charm too. But it was hard when he was so close to you, laughing with cheeks flushed from alcohol, looking at you with those eyes as black as night. The strain on your nerves at the thought that maybe if you looked too hard he would use his sharingan on you, having you under control to do whatever he wanted.

- I have a headache these days... Can you help me?

- How can I help you? - you asked as a question and not an offer of help.

- There's this girl that I like... But I think she hates me - he sank deeper beside you, sad - How can I make her like me?

You hesitated, not knowing how to proceed, were you imagining or was Kakashi asking you for love advice? He must have been very drunk.

- I don't know, ask her out - you tried to get away from him a little, the heat of the drink starting to take effect.

- I already did that - he settled down on the sofa, stopping leaning on you, resting his head on his hand, his elbow on his knee, the white hair falling over his face, he looked at you between the strands - I don't think it worked.

- So I don't know, ask her directly if you did something, maybe she'll tell you - you got impatient.

- No, y/n is too stubborn to admit anything! - he frowned, irritated by the suggestion and shaking his head to dismiss the idea.

You stopped whatever you were doing, now just staring at him with wide eyes in shock. No, you're drunk too, not as drunk as he is, but the drinking must be making you hear things, make things up, there was no way Kakashi was in love with you.

- Who? - your voice threatened to break, still surprised by the revelation.

- What? - he asked looking for a glass that was still full.

- The girl you're in love with, who is it? - he turned his head to you.

- I can't tell - he said, with the most serious look a drunken man can muster.

And just now, unfortunately, what was left of sobriety in him decided to show up, you would have to manipulate him into giving you the answer without realizing it.

- But how can I help you like this? Tell me at least a little about her.

Kakashi took a deep breath and leaned back on the sofa, he had found a glass that was half full, he was staring at the ceiling but seemed to see through it, far beyond what you could see.

- She is beautiful, very beautiful... She makes me laugh with her stressed way, she always gets angry so easily - he laughs - She likes to look at the stars and listen to music... Her laugh is contagious... And I see myself more and more in love with her... - he was silent for a long time, you even thought he had finished talking -... I need to tell her, I can't even sleep wellI, lose the time and I'm late every day, and she always fights with me because of that - he laughs softly.

Kakashi was so peaceful as he described you, he had a passionate look on his face, fascinated by his beloved, as if just remembering her brought him peace. But at the same time, you could feel his heart sink when he spoke because he thought his beloved despised him, because he was afraid of rejection, because he loved too much.

- I don't want her to hate me... I love her so much - tears started to well up in his eyes - I just wanted her to know that, but I can't even tell her - the tears fell amid sobs, his eyes got low.

You felt helpless not knowing exactly what you should do or say, so you decided to focus first on his problem with being drunk - as if you weren't. Assuming the role of responsible for the situation you got up, took the cup from his hand while he was crying, tried to wipe his tears and got him up saying "it's going to be okay, Kakashi" because it was the best your head could think of and took him outside from the bar after paying for the round.

Now you had a drunk and crying Kakashi on your shoulder being carried all the way home. It was better not to complain, as you could only end up making the situation worse, besides, you thought that part of it was kind of your fault, like, it was you who decided to be rude on purpose to the guy who was in love with you (even though before you didn't know that). Before you could think about it, you entered Kakashi's apartment and put him to bed, which didn't take much effort since he was practically asleep on his feet.

- I love you, y/n - he whispered with his eyes closed, you don't know if it's for you or some vision of his dream.

- And I don't really hate you Kakashi, it's just easier than admitting that I like you too - you spoke low so as not to wake him up, arranging the blanket, not bothering to say it since he wouldn't remember.

Kakashi opened his eyes slowly, a smile forming on his face, looking directly at you with a twinkle in his eyes like a shooting star in the night.

- I knew there was an explanation for all this anger - he said, his voice without any hint of drunkenness anymore - And I also knew that you would never admit it.

It took you a moment to process his speech, Hatake could see the gears turning inside your head as you was transfixed staring at him. When your gaze lit up, understanding what he had done, he started to chuckle at your expression.

- Were you pretending this whole time?!! - you took a step back, crossing your arms, indignation written on your face.

- Yes and no - he sat on the bed, still with the smile on his face - I did pretend to be drunk to get to know if you felt something for me, something besides anger, of course. But I didn't lie when I said I was in love with you, when I said that I stay up all night thinking about how to confess to you.

A silence hovered between you, he had already finished and now he was waiting for your answer, you on the other hand didn't know where to start, all you wanted to say getting stuck in your throat, needing a moment to organize everything.

- You took advantage of my kindness - you don't know why your mind chose to start with that one.

- For a good cause.

- Tricked me.

- Because you're stubborn and would never give me an answer, just like you're not giving now.

- And what answer are you waiting for?!

- That you tell me if you accept to be my girlfriend or not! - he said as if it were obvious.

The silence from before returned, you staring at each other again, your cheeks more flushed this time and his also slightly flushed. Even though he tried to keep a calm, carefree look on his face, Kakashi was internally begging for your answer to be yes, so that he could show the love he's had for you for so long, so that he could touch you the way he wanted, so that he could kiss you. You wanted to let Kakashi love you, you wanted to tell him that you loved him too, and you couldn't understand why you felt that this was a sign of frankness. But with a deep sigh, trying to silence this insistent thought, you looked at him and smiled.

- Of course I do, you idiot!

His smile widened, his cheeks now as flushed as your own with pure happiness.

- I guess I'm the luckiest man in this village now.

He gets up to hug you and can finally kiss his beloved, wrapping his arms around you. Kakashi wouldn't allow there to be a single day when you didn't feel loved after that.

Sorry for any typos;

Masterlist;

Buy me a coffee?

#kakashi hatake #kakashi x reader #kakashi hatake x reader #kakashi x fem!reader #kakashi oneshot #kakashi hatake oneshot #kakashi drabble #kakashi headcanon #kakashi fanfic #naruto fanfic #naruto oneshot #naruto dreabble #naruto headcanons #explore

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pancakes4two · 2 years

Note

Can I request an ig blurb, fc Taylor Russell and Harry is trying to get her back

yes love this ideaaaaaa. of course i had to feature midnights in this blurb ❤️

MASTERLIST | SEND ME A REQUEST

yourinstagram

Liked by tchalamet, alexademie and 69,829 others

yourinstagram 2021 was not the kindest to this girl. but here’s to more smiles and a better year ahead 💫☄️

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ynfan 🥺🥺🥺🥺 love u the most we are always always here for u

ynfan2 i love youuu

ynfan3 eek this caption after her deleting all her pics with harry… i’m scared for what that means

ynfan4 let’s not speculate guys ❤️

alexademie 🌹🌹🌹dreamgirl

hunterschafer angel. may 2022 be all u ever dreamed of & more

hsdaily

970,828 likes

hsdaily Harry confirms his breakup with girlfriend Y/N L/N in the Zane Lowe interview for Harry’s House 💔

When asked about Satellite, Harry said, “This is probably the most autobiographical song on the album. Obviously, people are free to interpret the lyrics however they please, but for me, when writing it I was really thinking about the end of my last relationship. I think one of the most devastating human experiences is having to let go of someone you’re still in love with, because they’ve outgrown the need for you. And I really wanted to explore that in this record, through this song.”

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harryfan1 gosh we all knew it happened but hearing it put this way hurts. i hope he’s okay.

harryfan2 convinced they’re right person, wrong time

harrygirl3 fuck y/n.

harrystan he’s still in love with her but she moved on GOD i can’t even begin to imagine how that feels

harrystan1 this song is gonna break me

deuxmoi

1,827,293 likes

deuxmoi SPINNING OUT, WAITING FOR YA

View all 20,829 comments

harrygirl not a good look on her after she made a whole ass show of being heartbroken over harry earlier this year.

harryfan1 talk about a downgrade

timotheestan keep my man’s name out your mouth

ynfan2 y’all they’re just costars can we please stop starting rumors for no reason

deuxmoifollower that’s funny bc i saw them making out at a rooftop bar in NY this past weekend lol. pretty sure she was in the city just to visit him

harryfan6 i’m glad they broke up. her true colors are showing

ynstan hi let’s chill with the putting down women please and thank you

your instagram story:

yourinstagram

Liked by harrystyles, tchalamet, and 80,727 others

yourinstagram no words. i’ve truly never been happier.

ps: can we as a society stop giving visibility to gossip fodder? i am very much happily single and not dating my costar. 😘 let’s focus on this incredible film and the amazing festival run we’re having!

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alexademie just an absolute vision.

rosalia.vt Congrats Y/N ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

tchalamet congrats best friend!

harrystyles Congratulations, Y/N. Proud of you as always.

yourinstagram thank you H 💫

ynfan1 UMMMMMMM

harryfan NO PLEASE NOT AGAIN

harrystan he saw the single in her caption and ran with it

#harry styles #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles imagine #harry styles fake ig #harry styles fake instagram #harry styles fic #harry styles social media #harry styles headcanon #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles fic rec #harry styles fanfic rec #harry styles fanfiction rec

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legless-fish-on-rollerskates · 9 months

Text

Okay obviously any movie adaptation of a book is going to be trimmed down. I get why they didn't spend time on certain things like Nora and Alex's dating history and Ellen's PowerPoint. It makes sense with the way movie beats work to show them getting outed immediately after they reconcile instead of having the extra act of them writing more emails acknowledging their love and fake dating Nora and June to try and take some heat off and Henry coming out to Phillip. Some changes like Henry's surname being different and having a king instead of a queen I know were about not offending the irl royal family and while I'm not exactly a fan of the monarchy I don't really care that much. Pez just being "Percy"? Kinda sad but again, I don't really care. I even understand cutting things like Bea's struggles with addiction, Catherine's depression and detatchment from her children, and Richards being the one who outed them with Raphael Luna as the triple agent - they have value to the story and I wish we could have seen them, but from a filmmaking perspective I can see how they would take up a lot of time to properly include. There were a lot of things I loved about this movie, which I'm adding to the bottom of this post so as not to be a total downer. Overall I think it was a good movie and a relatively faithful adaptation. But also there are some changes I am less a fan of.

So, my biggest issues with the RWRB movie:

Amy being trans is never mentioned? It's literally one line in the book could it not be one line in the movie? (At least they didn't cast a cis actress, so presumably the character is still trans, but we could have said that. She could have at least worn a pin that would not have been hard)

Bea is younger than Henry 🤨 What even was the purpose of this change?

Look I'm not even gonna talk about June we've all talked about June plenty already

Alex already knows he's bi? His idiot crisis is a huge thing! It establishes so much about both his and Nora's characters! Was it really so important to reduce things by five minutes that we couldn't get a quick "wait I like guys???" "congrats you are literally the last to know"

Nora being bi is never mentioned?? I get that without June you'd have Pez focus his affections on Nora but having a thing with a guy doesn't make her straight! She could have at least said something when Alex came out to her! (Also without June you lose the poly undertones of Nora June and Pez which I at least thought was pretty important)

Just gonna reiterate, because the more I'm thinking about it now the more upset it's making me - They erased Nora's bisexuality and Amy's transgenderism and June doesn't exist? Congrats you've killed all the story's queer women

Ellen and Oscar are supposed to be DIVORCED that was IMPORTANT

No inspiring Alex speech to the crowd while they're waiting on Texas - this moment could have been so much more active than standing in the hall waiting and hoping

Alex gives his coming out speech BEFORE they get permission from the crown?? That doesn't even make sense! One, he never talked to Henry about it, and two, the white house would never have risked international relations by letting him do something like that without the king's permission

Getting permission from the crown was way too easy. In the book Catherine literally had to blackmail Queen Mary into letting them come out. You're telling me the king just went, "Are you SURE Henry are you REALLY SURE okay fine"? It way takes down the tension of the climax and also kind of invalidates all of Henry's fear that he's been struggling with the whole movie. It would be way more powerful for him to stand up for himself against a grandparent who was outright against him rather than one who just wasn't really thrilled about it

Why was Henry fully dressed jacket and all after their first time did Alex not reciprocate or what

That being said, things I loved about the RWRB movie:

"And I thought Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz was a mouthful" - "He is"

"History, huh?" in the V&A (I'm sad this wasn't in the emails because it means no wider HH movement from the public, but it was really sweet how they did it)

Visibly obvious red-rimmed eyes from both Henry and Alex (though Henry more) throughout most of the third act - just a little detail that I appreciated

Alex's conversation with Henry about being a person in politics who looks like him when his dad didn't have that growing up

Henry full on swimming away so fast when Alex tried to tell him he loved him, no mosquito excuse in sight. This was just really fucking funny I don't know why

Exchanging the necklace for the ring - works really well, great excuse for him not to add the ring to the necklace (for those who don't know, they tried this first but the lump was really obvious and it screwed up the costume so they had to figure out a different way to do it)

Henry continuously playing the piano throughout the movie

"She's not a republican, is she?"

Literally everything Zahra Bankston does and says she is perfect I love her

Mike Holleran is just as irrelevant in the movie as he is in the book. I continue to find this hilarious

Henry differentiating between the persona of HRH Prince Henry and the person he is to himself, specifically the fact that he defines his true self as Henry Fox

The equerry vs butler argument, purely because before we watched the movie I was giving a recap to my dad of the important characters and described Shaan as "basically Henry's personal butler" when he didn't know what I meant by equerry. I'm sorry Shaan I didn't mean it

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greenhappyseed · 1 year

Text

Very spicy salty and lengthy rant incoming. This is part 1 of 2, focusing on All Might (with Izuku and Katsuki), while part 2 will focus more on Ochako and the 1A reunion. I’m trying to help myself feel better about how deeply I dislike the “Dark Deku” and Star & Stripe arcs because I need to excise the real-life anxiety I’m feeling over this coming up in the anime. IMO, these arcs did not age well at all, and are absolutely no better in light of the ~35 subsequent chapters. It’s just that the subsequent chapters feel more cohesive and well thought-out despite Horikoshi’s physical pain and burnout.

While I’m not emotional over fictional characters, it is true that these arcs have impacted the fandom; namely, many people who were fans of All Might, Aizawa, Midnight, Mic, and the overall UA vibe dropped out. I get that sense from some LOV fans too. Overall, it means far fewer fics and art pieces with my blorbos, and it’s also meant far less interaction with my blog. (I don’t give a damn about “engagement” or followers, but I like talking about my hyperfixation with others who share it!). Obviously the story has to change as the series end draws near, but spending SO much time with Endeavor, Hawks, and Jeanist has worn me out, even if I think Horikoshi is handling Endeavor’s character growth well. (FWIW, I’m utterly disinterested in “Hawks the Optimist” who inexplicably became the expert on how OFA works, and Jeanist is…well…you know…a male model.)

Aside from everyone’s basic rant about how Horikoshi introduced two hot middle-aged women only to more or less fridge them (after killing Midnight!), my real complaint in this post is that the Dark Deku & Star arcs made a complete mess of All Might’s character arc and in-universe relationships. Don’t get me wrong — Chapter 326 with Stain seemed like something Horikoshi had planned since the early days of the manga, and that one hit HARD. But the rest felt like an improvisation. It’s horribly inconsistent on (1) when All Might speaks up and when he can’t bring himself to talk, and (2) how his relationship with 1A is handled compared to Star.

When it comes to All Might’s failure to speak up, it feels like Horikoshi was nerfing All Might and reducing what we know the former No.1 is capable of doing. I mean, in Chapter TWO he stops Izuku from overdoing his training. After Kamino, All Might helps Izuku develop Shoot Style by telling Izuku point blank that he’s trying too hard to imitate his mentor. In the Overhaul/Nighteye arc, All Might refuses to support Izuku’s desire to take on a work study because he thinks it unnecessarily exposes Izuku to villain activity AND Izuku needs to strengthen his Shoot Style first. (The awkwardness with Nighteye is his third reason.) When Izuku persuades him about getting stronger under Nighteye’s guidance, All Might carefully asks himself if Izuku is being impatient just because Izuku is his successor before agreeing to let Mirio do the introduction. When Izuku confronts All Might over Nighteye’s prophecy, All Might makes SURE Izuku is ready to hear an uncomfortable truth and then proceeds to tell him everything. In the next arc, All Might encourages Izuku to use whatever support items he needs, even though All Might always chose to fight with just his body. All Might is protective of Katsuki and Shoto too — when they want to jump out of the taxi and fight the Cider House gang, he tries to get them to slow down and “assess the situation first.” In all these situations, All Might can’t physically stop his students (and is usually on the losing end of the argument, as happens with argumentative teenagers™️), but he uses his voice to speak up and make his opinion known.

At the beginning of Dark Deku, things are looking okay. All Might gives up on the secrecy that defined him early on and tells Hawks and Jeanist everything when he realizes secrets didn’t keep people safe. That’s good, I think, but he didn’t seem to consult Izuku about it. Based on context clues, and how All Might initially wanted Izuku to stay at UA (again, he spoke up!) I think his motivation was to recruit the pro heroes to protect Izuku at the hospital and at UA. It sort of makes sense he would move fast and wouldn’t ask Izuku’s permission to do that…but in front of Inko after Izuku wakes up, All Might DOES ask Izuku’s permission to tell her. A minor inconsistency, but all right. It’s made clear All Might is worried sick about Izuku, warning him not to go overboard (once more speaking up!). Hawks even picks up on All Might’s hesitation, telling him that Izuku has the right strategy and it’s on All Might to keep the kid propped up. All Might does not look pleased about this as he looks up in the sky towards Izuku.

In helping Izuku, All Might fends off assassins and talks about how Izuku’s idolization of him weighs on him. It’s not just that he promised Inko he would live and look out for Izuku; he’s acutely aware his boy is just like him in ways good and bad.

Yet when All Might sees Izuku struggle and he begins to see why Nighteye wanted him to retire, he can’t bring himself to talk to Izuku. Even though he understands Izuku’s feelings, he just can’t say a word. You would think seeing Izuku get shot, or barely escaping AFO’s mansion explosion, would prompt a conversation. But no, he says nothing. (Then again, nobody seems to remember Izuku was shot; no mention in the bath scene either.)

At the same time, we see Nighteye pop up in All Might’s thoughts, but we don’t see All Might struggling with telling Izuku what Nighteye told him (that is, we have no idea if All Might still feels violated in some way by Nighteye’s actions). We also don’t see All Might worrying about Izuku realizing the Symbol of Peace was just a human being. All Might isn’t trying to keep up Izuku’s hope by hiding the real burden of being the symbol (besides, didn’t he pull back that curtain in, oh, CHAPTER ONE???) We aren’t given any solid motivation or thematic through line — he simply procrastinated on what he knew he had to do for an unsatisfying hodgepodge of invasive thoughts. That is inconsistent with the All Might we know.

Before anyone comes at me, All Might not telling Izuku about Nighteye’s prophecy is very different. In that situation, All Might honestly did not think Izuku needed to know because knowing would put MORE pressure on Izuku than necessary. In Dark Deku, it’s the opposite, and All Might knows talking to Izuku could help relieve pressure.

I understand this is supposed to be All Might’s low point to lead into the Stain conversation. All Might is supposed to feel like “doing his best” didn’t prevent society’s downfall and didn’t stop his boy from repeating his mistakes. But…it feels like Horikoshi tied his tongue because that’s what needed to happen for plot reasons, and Horikoshi just wanted it to happen quickly. We still don’t have a good character reason why. Would it have been so unbelievable that Izuku, in his panicked state, brushes off All Might’s advice to rest? Or would that “break” Izuku’s idolization of All Might in a way that Horikoshi is still saving for the finale, where Izuku finally becomes his own hero without imitating All Might at all? I don’t have an answer, but it feels like we still could have had the same basic story beats without the bizarre characterization.

The strangeness of All Might staying quiet also makes Katsuki’s argument to Endeavor in Chapter 319 feel funny to me. Katsuki is spot on that Izuku doesn’t take himself into account and All Might does the same thing. While Katsuki understands far better than Izuku that All Might is human, Katsuki doesn’t consider how protective All Might can be of Izuku. Katsuki doesn’t see (or understand, perhaps?) how All Might doesn’t want anyone else to be a Symbol of Peace the same way he was. Maybe that’s part of Katsuki’s idolization issues? Post-362, with Katsuki seeing All Might’s vestige and showing him the trading card, I think Katsuki never let himself appreciate that he had the former #1 in his corner, or that a person can, in fact, use their willpower to become a symbol that inspires a nation. Not to sound like Prince Harry in “Spare,” but maybe there’s also a tinge of lingering resentment over feeling left behind? There’s just something about Katsuki screaming to Endeavor, of all people, that you can’t leave Izuku and All Might alone together when Endeavor knows Izuku has already ditched All Might AND Endeavor and Hawks have already realized they’re “too slow” compared to Izuku. Of course it’s Hawks — who was saying Izuku made the right choice like Second and, uh, AFO — to announce that Izuku left All Might. There’s also Shoto yelling about how Endeavor “let them operate together,” but it’s not like Endeavor has enough credibility to control either Izuku or All Might.

How does a #2 protect their #1 when they’re too slow? Can you ever “run alongside” someone whose power vastly outpaces yours, or is idolization all you can do? I think these are fascinating thematic questions, and Dark Deku makes a mess of them.

These problems compound in the reunion chapter, 327, which is really cute when it comes to the bath scene and the 1A kids, but is inexplicably confounding when it comes to All Might + the kids. Izuku clearly calls All Might multiple times to reconnect, but the man doesn’t pick up his phone. (I think we’re supposed to assume All Might is talking to Stain when Izuku calls, but…he couldn’t use the Hercules speech-to-text feature to tell the kid he’s driving over?) Then All Might just happens to show up at UA as Izuku talks about him, and gives Izuku a deep bow while saying sorry “for being of so little help.” He says nothing aloud about how he feels towards Izuku, and nothing aloud about being proud of 1A (though he basically thinks that in this chapter and again in 335). When Mina asks for an apology because he just disappeared post-war and left 1A with the Wild Wild Pussycats, he briefly says he’s sorry for any anxiety he caused, but quickly pivots to the need to prepare for “the battle that will decide it all.”

Like the Stain conversation, I understand that this is supposed to be All Might stepping up and figuring out his place in the world post-retirement. He’s realized he passed the torch to Izuku and 1A, but that doesn’t mean he’s useless. He wants to join the fight with the kids; to catch up and run alongside them. And to do that, he….ditches them to join Tsukauchi and Endeavor. I do appreciate that All Might is open with Tsukauchi (and Sansa!!!) about his OFA experience. But he basically disappears from UA for two days to deal with Star and TomurAFO before coming back in 335 and then seemingly disappearing again before joining the UA faculty to discuss the Aoyamas. (As pictured above, Ochako and Tenya, then Katsuki, all rightfully call out All Might’s “I am not here” act in 335.) Are you really telling me that the man who cries over Aoyama’s reveal isn’t emotionally attached to the class and wouldn’t, you know, BE HERE for them?

What makes All Might’s absence from 1A even more problematic is that now he’s…Star’s mentor??? See, All Might sends out the call for help from his international super friends and Star comes riding in acting like she’s his successor. Chapter 364 later reinforces this, with Agpar’s monologue about “children observing adults and adults supporting the children as they pass it forward” showing a Prime All Might reach out out his hand to Star. It’s stupid because All Might has a direct successor already, plus two students (Katsuki and Shoto) that are direct heirs to other parts of his legacy, and another group of students that he’s been hands-on teaching for the past year. But Horikoshi decides to ignore all that setup and focus on “All Might + Star” rather than have him spend more time with 1A. Once again, if the point is to introduce thematic questions of inspiration and imitation, and how there’s a difference between someone imitating their idol based on their own interpretation vs actually receiving mentorship from the human behind the idol, it’s utterly lost in the execution. I just can’t bring myself to see Star as anything other than an interloper. I’m glad her pilot bros stayed in Japan to help out, and her sacrifice was heroic I suppose, but it suffered the same flaw as All Might. She tried to take on TomurAFO alone, and the best she could do is slow him down temporarily.

That’s all I can manage for now! In part 2, I’ll take a closer look at Ochako and the chain that leads to Izuku’s retrieval and where we are now.

#I just want a little Dadmight ok?#Maybe one last tea time with Izuku and Katsuki?#bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha salt #bnha critical #all might #toshinori yagi #izuku midoriya #Deku #dark Deku #bnha meta #Mha meta

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rgr-pop · 4 months

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My goal for the year was to watch & log 100 movies. Shorts count, didn't matter whether I had seen them before, but they can only count once for the year. I logged 117!

First & last watched: Ken Russell's Women in Love (1969)--the reason I cared about movies so much this year, just an obvious life-changer for me--and Ken Russell's The Rainbow (1989)--Westlin's suggestion for the perfect round out. Surprised to be surprised by how good it was. Great films! Totally on the program! Questions to this day unanswered! Let's go!

Shorts (everything short of Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story) watched: 16

Favorite shorts: Nuit et Brouillard (Alain Resnais, 1956) (decided this year one of my all-time favorite films); Un Chant d'Amour (Jean Genet, 1950); Fireworks (Kenneth Anger, 1947)

Next year my shorts watching will be more programmatic

Films I watched twice in 2023: Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story (Todd Haynes, 1987) (another film I realized this year obviously belongs in my top ten--more specifically I decided finally that this is my favorite non-Texas Chain Saw film); Beau is Afraid (Ari Aster, 2023); The Nightmare Before Christmas (Henry Selick, 1993)

By decade: Before 1900: 0 1900 - 1910: 1 1910 - 1919: 1 1920 - 1929: 1 bro come ON what the FUCK 1930 - 1939: 1 im literally evil 1940 - 1949: 7 1950 - 1959: 3 1960 - 1969: 24 1970 - 1979: 14 1980 - 1989: 16 1990 - 1999: 17 2000 - 2009: 13 2010 - 2019: 9 2020 - 2023: 10

By nation/language roughly: uk/english: 6 us/english: 66 canada/english: 6 france/french: 10 italy/italian: 4 italy/france/french: 1 italy/english: 1 czechoslovakia/czech: 5 palestine/arabic: 3 soviet/russian: 2 russia/russian: 1 austria/german: 1 austria/french: 1 spain/spanish: 1 japan/japanese: 1 poland/yiddish: 1 poland/polish: 1 senegal/wolof: 1 brazil/portuguese: 1 sweden/swedish: 1 eur/farsi: 1 south africa/afrikaans: 1

numbers not adding up there but w/e

By director: Not sure if this is surprising or totally unsurprising, but in spite of my auteurial talk (and all the thematic/completionist plans I like to make), I very rarely watched more than two movies by the same director. I can't decide how I feel about this, nor do I know how to proceed this year given that my goal is to discover who my top five directors might actually be. How do you go about investigating that?

Overwhelmingly the director I watched the most was Adrian Lyne, with five films. I have a few more things to work on but I'm close to done with my shakedown/theory. Neither my favorite director nor favorite guy, I would say I probably 'enjoy' and 'personally get more out of watching' his films more than most. In second place, I watched three Kenneth Anger films--all shorts of course. I watched two films each by the following directors: Ken Russell, David Cronenberg, Stanley Kubrick, Pier Paolo Pasolini, Paul Schrader, Bernardo Bertolucci, Ti West, Todd Haynes, Michael Haneke, Jan Švankmajer (both shorts), and Billy Wilder (one of which being a war department documentary short).

I have mixed feelings about this approach (let me watch man movies if i I want to!) but a quick skim suggests I watched about 15 films directed by women (12%)--lower than expected and probably low for me typically. I always have a romance habit on the backburner so it's never hard for me to watch a lot of movies by women, but obviously my focus on revered directors I never previously wanted to spend time on has had an impact here, meaning I should make an effort with Great women directors in 2024 to keep that in check. I will also say that I specifically recall having a hard time getting my hands on things I wanted to watch by women in a few different cases, including by Great women directors (Barbara Hammer and Akerman), and especially also soviet women directors. There's an overlap here with difficulty accessing short films!

I'm not an active or thoughtful starrer, but these are the films I watched in 2023 that I've given five stars to:

Women in Love (Ken Russell, 1969) (upgraded from four after the year of appreciating it) Mandabi (Ousmane Sembène, 1968) Crash (David Cronenberg, 1996) Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story (Todd Haynes, 1987) The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (Tobe Hooper, 1974) Night and Fog (Alain Resnais, 1956) Salò, or the 120 Days of Sodom (Pier Paolo Pasolini, 1975) (demoted Teorema [1968] to four stars to prevent Salo is A Perfect Film deflation) Un Chant d'Amour (Jean Genet, 1950)

Least favorite films watched in 2023: Jojo Rabbit (Taika Waititi, 2019), Barbie (Greta Gerwig, 2023), All My Good Countrymen (Vojtěch Jasný, 1968), Zahrada (Jan Švankmajer, 1968), the one streaming true crime doc I watched that I then had to log (will not repeat in 2024)

Loved/treats for me: Barry Lyndon, Crossing Delancey, Unfaithful, The Cremator, The Night Porter, Cabaret, talking to people about Funny Games and realizing I love it more than I think I do

Recommended for the romance girls as a thank you for the good romance you have recommended me: Habibi (Susan Youssef, 2011)

Most incredible movie experience of the year by miles and I can only hope 2024 has something this good to offer: House of 1000 Corpses (Rob Zombie, 2003) anniversary screening my birthweek

The otherwise defining film of 2023 for me: Hostel (Eli Roth, 2005)

Onward! Back to work! On the Terror and Violence line! The Family is out there, comfortable, in relative peace…

#film #violence factory

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enquiringangel · 6 months

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Statements like: ‘None of the Lost Boys like Star’ lack a firm basis in canon. Talking just movie canon here rather than novels, scripts, etc. which actually add a bit more nuance to the whole thing.

Star's place in the story is as Michael's comphet love interest and as window dressing, because all movies must include a hot chick(tm). She has very little agency or role in the plot other than to lure Michael into the vampires' world. The story could have easily worked without her with only a few minor changes.

But that's typical of the film industry doing lady characters the dirty. We all know this. And we all know that characters of her type are widely disliked across Fandom as a whole for a bunch of reasons, one of which is probably that those of us who identify as women became sick to death of being portrayed as objects without agency because it can hit too close to home. Let's not flog that dead horse anymore.

Back to her relationship with the boys: they don't share enough screen time for us to definitively say they feel any particular way about her. Aside from Paul briefly saying "Ah, chill out girl" when she tells them off for hazing Michael, the only one who interacts with her at all is David. And that is very limited too: after the two scenes where she gets on the back of his bike, he basically pays her no attention for the rest of the movie. Though it is implied that they have some conversations off screen (about making Michael her first kill, etc.) that we don't see .

The boys' focus moves to Michael, and on male-male bonding. (I am very straight-faced while typing this.) Star fades away into the shadows during Michael's initiation not only because she was unable to stop him from making her mistake, but because her presence is unwelcome. It would be like someone's girlfriend going along to a wild bachelor party: probably doesn't happen that often and likely to be uncomfortable as hell. It's a boys' night. She'd cramp their style.

Whatever the writers' intentions may have been, any attempt at creating a rivalry between David and Michael for Star's affection falls flat on its face because David simply does not care to play that role. He does not seem to give a damn that Michael is obviously lusting after her, and shows no signs of being bothered about them sleeping together. In my view the scene where he makes Star get on the back of his bike instead of Michael's has very little to do with Star - that triumphant smirk makes it clear he's trying to get a rise out of Michael.

From the little interaction David does have with Star, I get the impression that their relationship is one of ownership. He views her as belonging to him, but obviously he has no problem sharing her if it means he gets what he wants - Michael joining them. For her part she comes across as being a little afraid of him, which is understandable considering the boys are literally horror movie monsters who brutally murder people. (Contain yourselves you monsterfuckers, yes I know, we all love them because of, rather than in spite of this.) But the way she laughs while riding on the back of his bike, the sheer joy in her eyes, it makes me think that's not all there is to it. There is happiness in her time with them as well.

#this got long #meta #star tlb #the lost boys #the lost boys 1987 #not directed at anyone i just have many thoughts

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pikahlua · 7 months

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Pika I was reading someone referring to the female characters in MHA as female leads and was upset that their character arcs weren’t fleshed out in comparison to bakugou and izuku, who are the protagonists? Or even dueteragonist and protagonist.

And I’m kind of confused as I feel like this is misleading, no? It doesn’t feel like any of the female characters have what most people would consider a lead role. Like, the closest I can think is Uraraka (and toga), but I feel like maybe she’s at most a dueteragonist or a confidant. But the rest of the female characters feel very tertiary.

Their roles are I think meaningful but don’t necessarily need to be fleshed out because of the focus of the story being bakugou/izuku/tomura/AFO/all might and the effects of hero society and the way they exemplify its failings?

What are your thoughts?

I agree that just because there are female characters doesn't mean one of them automatically has to occupy a lead role, and that analyzing one as such could lead to problems. That's to say nothing about the state of representation of female characters in literature let alone shounen manga. But if we're talking purely about function in a story, no female character in MHA occupies a primary lead role.

That said, obviously Ochako occupies a much more prominent role than many other characters do. She could easily be called the lead role in her subsection of the story. I would argue that the correct point of comparison for Ochako is not Izuku (never should it be Izuku for most any character). You could probably make a decent case for comparing her with Katsuki, but ultimately I'd compare her to someone a bit more separate from the main story, like Iida or Shouto.

I think that leads to a much easier conversation about how disappointing her story is to some people. If you can compare a female character to an equivalent male character in the story and find the end result lacking, that's certainly cause for disappointment. Ochako doesn't get as much character growth as Iida, at least not for a long while. And there certainly isn't the level of focus placed on her, her inner thoughts, her development, or the drama developing around her as there is with Shouto. But Ochako does have her big moments in the story too. Is it just that her story is written sloppily, or it's not a good story, or are we biased against her as readers somehow? It's hard to say. I used to find her compelling in the early story, but now I don't find her nearly as compelling as I did back then. But I could say that of many characters, male and female. Is the desire for Ochako to have a more fleshed out story the result of comparing hers to other male characters' stories, or is it indicative of a hunger for better stories about women in general in a way MHA never presented itself as?

What if I just say I like Ochako's character concept and her early moments but find that her overall story is too spread out over a long period of time for it to have any impact on me? I just don't like her story the way I like some others. Like, it's fine. It's a fine story. In all honesty it's one of the better stories I've seen for a female character in a shounen manga. It's just not engrossing for me. She's not what I'm here for. And I think it's entirely valid to be disappointed in that, regardless of if she was male or female.

#anon ask #ask pika #ochako uraraka #anti ochako uraraka #anti tag just in case #anime only friendly

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forgodsgoddamnsake · 1 month

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HELL'S ANGELS - 1st

Hello, girlies!

I have a new fanfiction which is this one obviously. Let me tell you that I'm falling in love with strong women. I have this urge to write about strong women, not lovey-dovey girls. I think that we need to focus on ourselves more, women should be the heroines of their stories. That is why I like girls in my stories to be strong and be the main character. This doesn't mean that Harry in this case is not considered a main character or a hero, but I feel like we all need to appreciate being loved with our strengths, weakness and everything.

Please note that it's called fiction for a reason, I AM IN LOVE WITH ITALIAN culture whatever it is. The whereabouts of this story won't be mentioned at all and you'll know why. Though this story contains italian names and language, it's not in Italy. It's not in america, it's not anywhere. Just expand your imagination;)

Warning: THE WHOLE STORY will include either smut, guns, language, mentions of rape, mentions of prostitution, drugs, murder, and so much more.

Don't forget to give me your comments, it keeps me going.

Like most girls? No, I am not.

I am the daughter of one of the most powerful men in the whole world. The one and only child of Paolo Cappitani, the older son of Donatello Cappitani, the mafia king. Paolo Cappitani doesn’t have children other than me, Y/N Cappitani, and he didn’t raise me like most fathers raise their daughters in out community. Most girls were beautiful things that get married and have kids just to tighten the strings among the powerful families, but not me. I was raised to be tough enough to take a full-grown man down with my bare hands. I’m so involved in my family business and that makes me the second powerful member of the Cappitani family. None of my family members could break Paolo's orders and that grants me the full respect of every single one of them, although some of them objected on how a girl be the second ‘Man’. Paolo Cappitani had one wife, Alessandra Cappitani, my mother, they had me before she died of complications of giving birth to me. So, I grew up without my mother and only had my father take care of me. Paolo never wanted another woman in his life, that was why he refused all the requests he received from his family to re-marry. He loved one woman only, and only one woman shall stay in his heart till he followed.

I look like my mother so much, that makes my father love me even more, because I’m his daughter from the woman he loved so much. He wanted to give me the world, not wanting to raise me like other girls just to give me off to another man. Paolo’s daughter must be a powerful, independent girl who wouldn’t need a man in her life. The way he raised me made me turn down all men that took interest in me, I don’t need them. What a man can add in my life? Nothing.

I’m experienced with guns, all kinds of knives and boxing. The exact opposite of typical lovey-dovey daughter of a mafia head.

But. But I kept my feminine appearance. Although I’m not a ray of sunshine, I am definitely a beautiful woman. My taste of clothes doesn’t match other girls, I prefer staying in the men’s gatherings other than having to sit all day with girls speaking of their dream knight in shining armor. I am my knight in the shining armor, so no need to hear about all the gossip and little talks about men and boys.

There is this day, my father is sick enough to not attend a business meeting with one of the most powerful families in the world. The Styles’ family. Since I’m the second in command, I take it upon myself to attend the meeting with my uncles and cousins. I stand in my room, giving myself the last look in the mirror. I wear short black leather skirt and a black shirt; my hair is up in a sleek bun. I keep my gun wrapped around my thigh and the silver knife in its housing under my shirt as I make my way out of my room. We are having the meeting at my family’s mansion, having dinner with the Styles before talking business. The Styles has already arrived, and my uncles give them the warmest welcomes before they sat at the long dining table.

The mansion is modern-styled, bullet-proof glass and mafia scents.

I make my way down the stairs, making sure I don't trip in the high heel boots. Bianca, my cousin, walks to me, excited. Bianca is a beautiful girl, raised in the traditional way, has long hair just like mine and hazel eyes. Hazel eyes are the signature gene in the Cappitani family, I have these as well.

“Y/N, the Styles are here! You should see Edward’s son, he’s so cute!” She said in her excited tone, holding a bowl of salad in her hand. I give her a small smile, looking at the bowl she’s holding. If I wasn’t the only daughter of Paolo, I could had been in her position. But I'm not in her position, Bianca has a bowl of salad in her hand, while I have a gun under my skirt and a knife under my shirt.

“I’m sure he’ll be interested meeting my beautiful cousin.” I wink at her before walking towards the dining room.

The dining room is spacious, has bullet-proof panoramic windows, a few portraits hanging on the wall. The most significant portrait is the one that had my father’s face on it, sitting on his armchair in a black expensive suit. A crystal chandelier hanging from the high ceiling; black chairs surrounding the glass dining table.

I go in the dining room, my boots clicking on the floor. The seat of my father is empty, so then, it is mine to claim. I take a seat at the head of the table, men on their chairs. The only faces that are familiar are my family's, all of them have hazel eyes, but the green ones are the Styles’. Edward Styles sits next to my uncle, and next to Edward is a handsome man, must be his son, Harry Styles. I don't give a smile, but I nod my head in respect.

“It’s an honor to finally meet the Styles family and at our home.” I welcome in a professional tone.

“Thank you, young lady, I’m not quite familiar with you, yet.” Edward Styles nods back.

“This is-“ My uncle, Antonio Cappitani, tried to answer, but I interrupt him.

“I’m Y/N Cappitani, the only child of Paolo Cappitani. He sends his apologies that he can’t attend our little dinner due to his illness.” I answer without giving even a hint of a smile.

“May god heal him.” Edward says, inspecting my attitude. “I’ve heard so much about you, Ms. Cappitani. Your father must be so proud to raise such a beautiful girl like you.”

“Thank you, sir, but I’m not a girl. I’m the woman of the Cappitani family.” I correct him as the girls of my family bring the food to the table.

“You sound so arrogant.” Harry comments. It is the first time I hear his voice. His voice is deep just like his father’s, but that shall not be something to intimidate me. I can intimidate a whole country; a pair of green eyes and a deep voice cannot intimidate me. The girls have left us alone to eat.

“I am, thank you.” I give a half smirk.

“Let’s eat, please.” My cousin, Leonardo, says.

I start eating in silence, everybody is making small chats during eating. Cousins are chatting with Harry and his cousins, my uncles chatting with Edward and his brother. I prefer to stay silent.

Silence means so much to me. I don't speak too much because I want my words, whenever they come out, to matter. People can only appreciate the words of a person that doesn't talk much.

Harry’s eyes look at me from time to time, he isn't used to seeing girls in meetings, but he has heard so much about me already to know I am different from other girls.

The first time he heard about me was when the rumor had it that I killed a traitor when I was only seventeen. Killing is a big deal, and when it comes to women, it was a major deal. But he never imagined the girl that everybody talked about in the mafia business could be this beautiful with long hair and captivating hazel eyes.

I don't smile much or give expressions. He notices that, but he doesn't know that I am raised to not give too many expressions. Expressions can be easily read, and a readable person can never rule, and since I was raised to rule, my expressions are little.

“Tell me, young lady, how are things going on in your life? Found a husband yet?” Edward asks me. I raise my eyes from my plate to look him in the eyes, not giving an expression as usual though I am startled by the question. I swallow the food in my mouth, “No, sir, I’m not planning on finding a husband.”

“That must be a shame, a beautiful woman like you can easily get herself a husband.” Edward says and my uncles nod in agreement. I swipe my eyes at my uncles, glaring at them with my expressionless eyes.

“I can easily find myself anything I want, Mr. Styles. A husband is the least of my worries. There are better things to look forward to.” I raise my chin up as I finish my sentence.

Harry’s eyes are on me, he likes the arrogant attitude of mine though he hates admitting that to himself. The way I am dressed, the look in my eyes, my soft expressionless face and the smile I never give are all different from what he's used to see whether among the families or girls in the outside world.

“And what are those things?” Edward asks with an arched eyebrow.

“Keeping my family’s name up, making more money, and last but not least, making my father proud of his only daughter.”

Edward likes my answer, and he likes me even though he is provoking me to get answers.

“Since we all have finished our plates, would you like to join in the study?” I politely ask them, and they nod. I am the first to stand up and walk out of the dining room to the study. That is another thing I was taught, the first to stand up is the boss.

The study has warm colors, beautified with plants and portraits. The desk of my father is gigantic and his chair that stands behind the desk is long enough to give superiority to whoever takes a seat. I make my way to my father’s chair, take a seat and behind me are the men. To say the least, my family hates whenever I am in control, but the power of my father’s word and the way I rule things have them muffle their nasty words.

There are enough seats for all members of all families, and they all take their seats, chatting and waiting for the drinks. I pull out my pack of cigarettes and pull one to place between my lips that are covered in red lipstick, I light the tip of the cigarette and watch everyone’s faces.

I grew the habit of smoking when I became nineteen years old, my father doesn't like seeing me smoke so I don't smoke in front of him, but the rest of the family cannot disagree. I was raised to have a man’s brains in the body of a golden girl so that was no surprise for them.

Most of the men also start smoking, and I can only picture the power I have at that moment. With bookshelves like a library behind my chair, portraits of the most-known painters in the world hung on the walls, my cigarette and my attitude.

Girls of my family bring drinks, wine and tea. One hell of a mixture. Some of the girls giggle a little, looking at the young men, especially Harry. I just roll my eyes at their attitude and order them to step outside.

“So, tell me Mr. Styles, how can the Cappitani tighten their strengths as you previously mentioned to my father?” I hold my glass of wine in the same hand that has the cigarette, pulling the glass up to my mouth.

Edward clears his throat, knowing very well that he shall not discuss that topic with me. “Ms. Cappitani, you must know that our families have the upper hands in this country. We need to know that there will be no conflict of interest going on between the Styles and the Cappitani.”

“Of course, tightening both families will give us unlimited opportunities in the business.” my uncle, Antonio, says.

“Right, we need to know that anything between our families will be discussed with anything but blood.” my other uncle Lorenzo, agrees.

I can smell an arranged marriage from a mile away, their eyes must have been on one of the girls in the home of the Cappitani.

“Tell me, what do you have in mind, Mr. Styles?” I ask, chin up.

He smiles, “As you know, young lady, all’s fair in love and war.” I nod at his words, encouraging him to continue.

“We don’t want war, we want the love. That’s why we would like to ask for your hand.”

Surprise? Absolutely. But they can't know that, so I keep my face as it was before he gave me his request. I raise my glass to my lips again, take a sip and place it on the desk. My cousin, Leonardo, says, “We would be hon-“ I interrupt him with the knife I pull out of my shirt and let its sharp tip hit the hard wood of my father’s desk.

“Leo, think twice before you speak.” I glare at him. I look at Edward again, “Mr. Styles, as I said, I’m not looking for a husband. We have the most beautiful girls you could see, any of them would be honored to marry one of the Styles.”

“You wouldn’t?” Edward narrows his eyes a little.

“Of course, I would, but I have different goals in life, and since your request’s base is to tighten the relationship between our families, then any girl will be happy to be the one.”

“But we want you.”

The man is intent, I give him that, but just when I am about to refuse politely once again. The door of the study has opened to show my father’s face, Paolo Cappitani. He looks sick, his face is pale, and he can barely hold himself on his feet. I stand up from my chair as all of my family members do, I walk to him to help him take his seat that I had a moment ago. He sits down and I stand next to him.

“How are you, Edward? I haven’t seen you since your mustache.” My father points at his mustache, referring to the mustache Edward has, my father laughs as everyone else.

“I’m very good, Paolo. I hope you feel better soon.” Edward is extra polite with Paolo. My father is much older than Edward so that makes sense.

“Thank you, my friend. I heard you were asking for my daughter’s hand.” Paolo’s voice is hoarse, he is very sick, but he has to have this discussion by himself, because he knows I'll start war if he isn't there.

“Yes, Paolo, Ms. Cappitani is a nice lady.”

“I think you heard her saying that we have many girls, why her?” Straight to the point, score, Paolo.

“Our family needs a powerful female figure, I-I have cancer, Paolo. I’m not going to stay on this earth for too long, so that’s why we need two powerful personalities to rule my family.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that.”

“Don’t, I made peace with my cancer. The serious problem here is that my family will face serious trouble if only one-person rule after me, because of the issue you know about.”

“Yes, yes, I know. Go on.”

“I’ve heard so much about Ms. Cappitani. You raised a really powerful, beautiful woman, and a woman like her will be a huge addition to my family.”

“But, Edward, you must know that my girl puts her family first. She’ll like to only serve to her family’s side.”

“I know, but we will be one family by marriage. I just need her to pull my family together along with my son.”

“Oh, so you must be the groom, young man.” Paolo directs his words to the green-eyed Harry sitting next to his father.

“He can’t rule his own family and needs assistance?” I scoff.

“Y/N, go get some fresh air.” My father orders without taking his eyes off of Harry.

I nod and get out of the study, feeling disrespected, but he is my father so there is nothing to do about it.

I take a walk in the garden of the mansion, putting another cigarette in between my lips.

There is no way my father is going to throw me to the Styles. I only want to rule my own family, never not even for once I thought of marriage. Not too long after, I feel a figure stand next to me, pulling his own cigarette. Without even glancing, I know that he is the green-eyed jerk.

Harry is handsome just like his father, but I couldn’t care less about his appearance at that moment.

“I don’t want to marry you, by the way.” Harry starts, exhaling the smoke.

“Do I look like I give the teeniest, tiniest fuck about what you want?” I look at him, glaring at his provoking green eyes.

“No, but this arranged marriage is the best option for our families.”

“For your family.” I correct, throwing my cigarette. “Not my problem that you’re a fragile guy that can’t rule on his own. Grow some balls, will you?”

“I could strangle you right here, right now.” He smirks, getting irritated and throwing his cigarette.

“Well, let’s see who’ll do it first?” I pull my gun as he pulls his. The tip of my gun is under his chin, his is right on my chest. We both stare into each other’s eyes, glaring.

Though his eyes are so beautiful, they only provok me more to shoot him.

“Hey, kids! Play nice.” Edward’s voice yells, walking out of the mansion and behind him his family’s men and some members of my family including my father.

“Y/N, put the gun down.” My father says, but my eyes are still on Harry.

“Harry, you too.” Edward says.

I bite my bottom lip to contain my anger while Harry glares at me one last time. We both put our guns down, I gave Harry an eye of disgust before walking away.

“Bitch.” Harry mutters to himself.

“Son of a bitch.” I mutter to myself as I walk by the men and into the mansion.

“They’re meant for each other.” Edward laughs, looking at Harry who’s walking towards them.

“I’ll give you an answer to your request as soon as possible, Edward.” Paolo assures Edward before they say their good-byes.

Harry is in the car with his dad, driving back home. Harry can't keep silence like Edward, so he speaks as he’s driving with his two hands, he only does that when he’s anxious. Usually, Harry would drive with one arm.

The arrogance that surrounds you like an aura, he’s not fond of, so he has to fight to not marry the girl with an attitude of a rebel man.

“Dad, I hate her! Let me marry any other girl, but not that bitch.”

“Language, Harry.”

“I’m not fifteen, dad. I HATE HER. She’s so arrogant, did you see how she spoke?”

“She was raised to rule, Harry. It’s not easy for her to act all girly like the girls you do every day!”

“I don’t need her.”

“Yes, you do.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Yes, you do.”

“Dad, please, she’s acting like the queen of the world.”

“She was raised this way for god’s sake, Harry. A girl like her will be a great partner for you. We need her, and that’s final.”

Harry huffs at his father’s words. Is fate easily broken? No, it is not. If it’s his fate to spend the rest of his life with a woman he wishes he could kill every day, his hands will be tied, and he’ll be forced to act just like the fate has decided. The bleak fate of his marriage to Y/N Cappitani, the second ‘Man’.

“If you’re even considering their request, father, I’ll kill myself. If he desperately wants my hand, I’ll chop it off for him.” I angrily threaten, standing in my father’s study, surrounded by my family.

“Y/n, you need to calm down.” Paolo rolls his eyes at me as I’m walking back and forth.

“I’m not calming down, why does he think I’ll just accept?”

“Back in my days, girls didn’t have a say in marriage.” My uncle, Antonio, scoffs. Uncle Antonio is a thorn in my side, he is the second born to my grandfather. I’m certain that he wishes that my father dies so he can get rid of me so he can rule, but to his misfortune I’m not going anywhere. He can rule over my dead body.

“When was that? The pharaohs era?” I sarcastically ask, crossing my arms and looking directly to him.

I am perfectly aware that this shouldn’t be my attitude, especially to my uncles, but I am unable to control my anger if somebody lays a finger on my future.

“Y/N!” My father warns before he takes a look to our family members. “Please, give me a moment alone with my daughter.”

As they do as they’re told, my uncle Antonio while walking out past me, glares into my eyes, but that shall not be a problem, I can glare, too. A boy is all it takes to avoid such conflict in the family, but my father could never betray his beloved Alessandra. Paolo Cappitani knows for sure that this is only the calm before the storm. He knows that I will start war in my own family, not because I’m so determined to rule, no. It is because this is what my father raised me to do.

When everyone is out, Paolo sighs deeply, like he’s carrying a hundred stones in his chest that he can’t get rid of. The storm is coming.

“Take a seat, y/n.” He softly asks me.

I take what he says as an order, so I do what I’m ordered and take a seat on the chair by his desk.

“Sei diventata una ragazza così bella.” Paolo says, looking into the figure of his only daughter who only took so little of how he looks, rather I took every beautiful feature of my mother. Telling me that I’ve grown to become such a beautiful girl, means a lot to me, but he only gives the first sweet talks when he wants to get me to do something I don’t want.

“Thank you, father.” I, politely, nod.

“The Styles and our family have one common enemy, as you already know,”

“Yes, the Scavo.”

“Exactly. The Styles, currently, are facing serious trouble with the Scavo, some of their family members are turning against their own family and joining the Scavo as they think Edward is about to die and that Harry is not fit to become the ruler of their family. The situation, if you noticed, is so similar to ours. When I die, some of the family will turn on you and object your ruling. This situation requires a powerful tie so you and Harry could take down the Scavo and keep the families intact.”

“But, father-“

“Let me finish, will you? Harry, also, is a tough guy and that is why you both need to get married. He is not in need for just a pretty wife to have his kids, he needs a strong woman like you to keep his family together. And when my time comes, you’ll need him, too. The next heirs of both families marrying, you are a perfect match, y/n.”

His words have this undeniable effect on me, I never thought of the situation like this. Unfortunately, he sounds so right. My uncles will turn against me once my father dies, god forbid, and the battle I had in mind will not be an equal one if it’s me against my family and the Scavo.

“Okay, father, but I have two conditions.”

The day has come.

I’ve never even thought that I will be engaged before Bianca, my cousin, on the contrary, I’ve thought that I’ll be the last to get engaged if not ever. Today, I’m looking into the mirror to see myself wearing a Champagne silky long dress, unlike the other girls’ dresses, my dress is not so modest. The Champagne dress was satin silk, the V-neck showing enough cleavage while my back is in full exposure in the backless dress. The spaghetti straps holding the dress up on my shoulder as my long leg is showing from the long cut in the side of the dress. I let my hair fall down on my back, put enough makeup and just a golden bracelet are enough accessories. Looking over to the girls in my room, giggling in their floral modest dresses, I can clearly see the difference between me and them. None of the girls has trained to become the heir, none of the girls is hiding a gun under her dress, but I am.

A knock on the door brings me to reality, and there I see my cousin, Elio, snoop his head through the door, winking at the girls.

Elio is more like a brother to me.

Elio is a handsome man, hazel eyes and two sets of eye-lashes like mine. Muscular guys tend to draw girls in, but he isn’t a just a muscular guy with perfect jawline, no. Elio has a heart of gold, good manners and courage of a lion. His father, my uncle, has died a long time ago and we were raised together by my father so we lived most of our lives under the same roof. I can, without a doubt, give him my back and I know that his knife will only reach my enemies.

“Aren’t you pretty all dressed up like a girl?” He says, walking into the room, holding my hand and giving me a sweet kiss on the cheek. He is wearing a navy blue suit with no tie.

“I am a girl, El.” I protest, smiling at him.

“You’re the most beautiful girl, Y/N/N.” He smiles back. “Are you ready to get engaged?”

“No, I’m not, let’s kill them.”

“Nice idea, but let’s call it plan B.” He chuckles, putting my arm around his. “Let’s go?”

I nod and walk out the room with him by my side and the girls walking behind us. We take our steps slowly because the heels I have on can trip me in a blink of an eye. The walk down the stairs feels endless, maybe because I never intended to be the one getting engaged to a pair of green eyes. The mansion has been decorated gracefully, veins of flowers along the handle of the stairs, romantic light system and many figures of people that matter. An occasion like this doesn’t happen often, the heirs of two of the most power families getting engaged, that is unheard of. The smell of fine wine and champagne stuck up my nose, as well as the scents of the expensive fragrances our guests have dived in. I can see that the guests have made an effort to dress perfectly for the occasion, over-priced suits and designer dresses. None of them catches my eyes, not even the figures of my own family, I only feel Elio having me in his arm and my father who sits on one of the fancy armchairs. And the pair of the green eyes, the damned groom I’ll be married to for the rest of my life.

Harry is not bad looking, oh no, he is not. He has the eyes, the smile, the aura of an angel, but he is certainly not one. Those green eyes, to me, looked like grass after a rainy day, while his lips were pinker than a barbie dress; the features of a handsome man, that is all that can be said to describe his appearance. I like handsome men, but my only prospective of a handsome man is Elio, and Harry is for sure just as handsome as my dear Elio. I can say that Harry is attractive, but his attractiveness provokes me, not that I want my future husband to be unattractive, but I hate that guy so every little thing about him pushes my buttons. Harry stands by the end of the stairs in a fancy black suit with no tie, he has a taste. I never liked ties.

The classical music. I love classical music when it’s not played in my engagement. As Elio and I take our last step on the stairs, he gives Harry a small smile and hands him my hand after shaking hands with him. Harry takes my hand and walks me to where the stage where we should sit. There are beautiful golden-colored chairs and floral backdrop right behind them. The girls really made an effort in the decorations, I can see a welcome stand by the front door in the mansion, decorated with golden leaves and white flowers. The welcome stand says ‘Welcome to our beginning, Y/N, Harry.’

“Beginning my ass.” I comment, rolling my eyes.

“I hope you trip in this beautiful dress you’re wearing, y/n.” Harry comments back, not changing his smiley expression and not even looking at me.

My smile widens as we both sit on the chairs, “Bite me, Harry.”

Harry unbuttons his suit jacket before he sits down, both of us giving the best smiles we have, looking to the guests that are clapping and smiling at us.

The atmosphere is filled with fake happiness and guns hidden under fancy clothes. Various families have come to bless the engagement of two people they’ll be afraid of one day. My two conditions are plain and simple, one is that I get to keep my surname and become Mrs. Cappitani-Styles – I wish this day never comes -, two is that I’ll be guaranteed that I’ll be the one to rule my family.

The smell of toxic cigars between men’s lips, mixes with the pretty faces of girls and women. Trays of champagne and wine are going back and forth only for the hands of the guests to snatch a glass or place an empty one. Air is filled with signs of luxury and bleak dark souls dressed in mafia silhouettes.

People come and go, congratulating us and our fathers on the wonderful engagement party, wishing us the happily ever after I’m not planning to have.

“Your fiancée is beautiful, Harry.” A woman I don’t recognize compliments me, giving me a tight hug. The woman is beautiful and she sounds sincere.

“Right, isn’t she, mom?” Harry says to the woman who goes to give him a kiss on the cheek. Without even giving it second thoughts, I know he’s being sarcastic, but to hell with him, I am beautiful whether he denies it or not.

“I’m Anne, sweetie, Harry’s mother.” She smiles at me and I politely smile back.

“Nice meeting you, Mrs. Styles.”

“Soon you’re going to be Mrs. Styles just like me.”

“Mrs. Cappitani-Styles.” I correct her and immediately regret my harsh tone. “You look beautiful in this dress.” I say, complimenting her attire to soothe her of the words that skipped my mouth.

“Thank you, sweetie. I’ll go check on your father, Harry.” She smiles at us one last time and goes to Edward.

“Aren’t you lovely?” Harry rolls his eyes.

“What a coincidence! You’re just as lovely.” I scoff back.

“My gorgeous fiancée.”

“My fiancé, the apple of my eye.”

I can suffocate right now from just having him sit next to me. I can’t quite get why I hate him, but I don’t want a marriage so that’s enough reason to despise his guts. On the other hand, he shares the same feeling about me.

After a short time, he takes a velvet box from his jacket, looking at me with the most sarcastic look I ever saw. He opens the box that contained a diamond ring with a fat rock. I hate diamond. Every set of eyes are on us, so I shouldn’t snatch his head off just yet. He takes my right hand in his as he slips the ring around my finger as the applause starts.

I feel Elio whisper in my ear, “Please, smile.”

“What smile? I’m trying not to shoot him.” I whisper back.

“God, you have a gun on you?” Elio sounds surprised, of course, no bride-to-be has a gun under her engagement dress.

“Don’t sound so surprised or I’ll shoot you too.”

“Just smile for fucks sake.” He whispers one last time and goes off.

Harry has his friend whisper in his ear, “You look like you’re in the funeral of your enemy, stop with the act.”

“I’m barely holding myself from stabbing her arrogant ego.” Harry whispers back.

“You’re going to hold yourself for the rest of your life, mate.” With that, his friend goes to congratulate me.

“I must say, you look beautiful, y/n. Congratulations on the engagement.” The man doesn’t look so much like Harry, and doesn’t have green eyes. He has dirty blond hair and blue eyes, he can’t be a Styles.

I shake his hand that he spreads for me, “Thank you, you are?”

“I’m Tyler, Harry’s friend.” He answers and pulls away his hand.

“Well, well, well, two families against one, not nice.” An annoying voice interrupts the conversations, breaking the rhythm of fake happiness with his pure evil voice.

A figure of a man comes into sight, wearing an expensive suit that matches the guests except the daisy he has in his suit jacket. A clown to say the least. The grey hairs give him the benefit of the doubt as if he’s a middle-aged man, but he is not, he is my age. The grey hair is only a gene he got from his mother just like his perfect teeth that are shown between his lips that are turned up into a smirk, make him look like a decent gentleman. But that person with black eyes is not a decent gentleman, he is the definition of a devil with angel wings.

A man escorts the women and girls all inside a room while the other men stand tall pulling out their guns and pointing them at the man and his entourage. The guns pulled out are all of different types and sizes, machine guns, typical guns and so much more. Perks of being born in a mafia family. Harry’s hand finds its way to the gun hidden under his jacket, but not pulling it out.

“Woah, why all aggressive? I’m here to congratulate the beautiful bride.” The grey-haired man, also known as Alessandro Scavo, raises his hands as a symbol of peace and surrender. None of his men has pulled out their guns, so he must be here just to cause chaos.

I stand up, raising my chin up as my father taught me. The clicks of my high heels can be heard clearly from the silence that suddenly hit the party. Harry looks at me with furrowed eyebrows as he also follows me into standing up. I stop right in front of the face of Alessandro, his features disgust me.

“Party crasher, why are you here?” I ask with no expression, maintaining my calm. His eyes look me from head to toe, admiring me in his mind. His eyes sparkle every time.

“You’re still the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, y/n.” He whispers and I know I’m the only one that can hear those words. “I just answered, I’m here to congratulate you on the engagement.” His voice becomes loud as the words skip his mouth, putting on a fake show of crazy happiness.

“You’re not invited.” I simply say, not falling for his shows. I can’t see, but I feel someone’s body behind me, but actually there are two, Elio and Harry.

“Do I need an invitation? I thought we were practically family. And look who it is! Harry freaking Styles, man of the hour, whom gets to have Y/N Cappitani on a silver platter.” His voice is so loud, I want to smack him. Alessandro’s eyes are insane, wide and black. Harry’s gritted his teeth, glaring at the pair of black eyes. “Eh, Paolo, don’t you think it’s unfair to connect both heirs in one marriage? I don’t stand a chance.” Alessandro’s words are directed to my father who is drinking his glass of wine in silence, not even looking at the situation.

I bite my bottom lip before speaking loud and clear. “Speak to me, Alessandro. You want to congratulate the bride, here I am! But if you want to start war right now, I can take you down in one move as I always have.”

“No, baby, I can never lay a finger on you.” His eyes are soft but quickly change as they turn to look at Harry, pulling out his gun in Harry’s face over my shoulder. “But him, I can.”

I can feel three guns over my shoulders as Harry pulls out his own gun to Alessandro’s face while Elio’s gun is over my other shoulder. And just like that, Alessandro’s men all pull out their guns in everyone’s faces.

Maintaining calm. Lesson number one.

“Let’s all calm down, tell your men to put down their guns, Alessandro.” I calmly ask, his eyes look into mine and draft to Harry again then back into mine. “Alessandro, tell them to put their guns down.” I repeat.

He bites his bottom lip and puts down his gun and motions to his men to follow. I follow him, motioning to the men to put down their guns, everyone obliges but Harry. His gun still pointing at Alessandro over my shoulder. I raise my hand to softly take the gun from Harry, to my surprise, he lets me have it.

“Now, I’ll appreciate it if you leave, Alessandro.” I say sternly.

His face looks hurt, but quickly puts on a smiley face. “Anything for you, baby.”

Alessandro’s face comes closer to mine, but his face actually is getting closer to Harry’s over my shoulder.

“You’ll have her over my dead body.” Alessandro glares into Harry’s face before turning around to leave.

Harry is clueless of what is happening or why Alessandro has this grudge that can’t be explained, but he feels possessive of me for the first time. He thinks that I am his fiancée, so no one can have me even he wishes to cancel my existence.

“Let’s continue with our celebration as if nothing happened.” I clap my hands before nodding to my cousins that stand by the door of the room which contains countless women and girls. My cousins nod and open the door for the girls as I make my way back to my chair.

Edward, who’s sitting on an armchair next to my father’s, is definitely impressed by the situation. He thinks this is exactly what Harry needs, a woman that can contain the situation and maintain the stability.

“Not many girls can be that brave and calm with a hundred guns around them.” Edward comments, smoking his cigar.

Paolo smiles, he appreciates the compliments he gets when it comes to his beloved daughter. Every time he watches how I handle situations, he grows prouder of his way of raising me. “She is raised to rule, what do you expect?”

“That’s what Harry is missing, to handle tough situations.”

“She has her bad moments, too.”

“They may not see it, but they’re perfect for each other.” Edward smiles to himself.

Edward cannot leave his son without being sure that he has backup. His little Harry grew to become this handsome man, ready to be the ruler, but with the rebels in their own family, that cannot happen without war starting. Edward cares about his family, that’s certain, but he cares about his son more. And war means that his son can get hurt one way or another, and he cannot let that happen to his own flesh and blood. And since the day Edward has known that Paolo Cappitani is raising his own flesh and blood to rule, adding that it’s a girl, Edward made up his mind to make her a part of his family.

Since the engagement, Harry and I never spoke. We’ll be married in three months because Edward only has a few months left to live and he wants Harry to be prepared before he takes his role. Harry is caught up in work, making deals, having fights with his family, the normal days. Though, he isn’t so fond of me, he is interested in knowing me even more. He hates to admit that he finds me attractive, but that is the truth even if he denies it. My beautiful face and body attract him, that’s for sure, but my attitude is another thing that makes him wanting to get to know me. The life of his was not a desert before our engagement, he has had his fair share of women to fool around with. Short girls, tall, thin, thick, flat, busty, and all types of girls. But not ever has he ever crossed ways with a girl like me.

I am raised to be a champion, to speak up and make everyone listen. Bravery is the root Paolo has planted in me and Elio. Elio and I can fight an army alone and not even blink in fear, it’s either we win or die in dignity. Paolo used to wake us up in the middle of the night to practice shooting, practice knifing, boxing. Sometimes, the training was hard, but I never hated my father because of that, I love him more every time I see myself equal to all men.

The same way, harry is raised. Fear is not in his dictionary. If the whole world was against him, he’d pull out his gun and shoot to his victory. Everywhere, anywhere, he can manage to be the alpha.

Only a month till our wedding, the girls are taking care of everything I should take care of. They are designing my wedding dress while I’m going to the gym with Elio. I have a sports bra on, gym shorts and a pair of sneakers, my hair is in a messy bun. Elio’s muscular upper body is hidden under his white t-shirt, he’s having a nap on the passenger seat though the distance to the gym is not that long. I pull over at the gym parking roughly only to freak out Elio. He snaps his eyes open in surprise, only to find me laughing.

“I hate you.” He glares at me as I get out of the car.

I open the backseat door to get my gym bag and let it hang on my shoulder, Elio does the same and we head together to the gym.

“I’ll kick your ass today.” He smirks at me, opening the door of the gym for me.

“Huh, you wish!” I roll my eyes, getting in.

The gym we’re used to go to is the one we were trained at, we can do boxing and kick the hell out of each other. Our trainer, Simon, is an old man that has always kicked both our asses to teach us how to knock out people in one move. We make our way to the lockers and when we make our way to the machines we start with some warm-ups.

“Children, long time no see!” The voice of Simon interrupts our warm-ups. I look up at him and give him a warm hug, he pats on my back before he lets go of me to hug Elio who now is shirtless.

“We were here two days ago, Simon.” I laugh, doing my warm-ups.

“That’s too long.” He smiles, letting go of Elio.

Simon is an old man, bald, white beard and has the body of an old champion. He is the one that taught us everything we know about boxing.

“When you finish with the gym, hit the door. We have some people to send to the hospital.” He says, going through the door that leads to where our boxing sessions take place.

After a while and as we’re finished with the gym, we refill our water bottles and hit the door, just like Simon said. Huge, is the perfect word for the boxing stadium -as we like to call it-. There are many punching-bags hung from the walls, speed-balls and all you can imagine and last but not least the square where the magic happens. I still remember the first time I was knocked out with a bloody nose on that damn square.

Some of our boxing friends high-five us, say their hellos as Elio and I enter.

“Holy shit!” I gasp, looking at the man boxing on the boxing square.

“What?” Elio asks looking at me and I nod towards the arena. Elio looks where I am looking.

The green-eyed jerk is boxing with some other guy. He has the boxing gloves on just like his gym shorts, he is shirtless. Looks like he has many tattoos, but I just roll my eyes and look away before I can mesmerize his image.

“Oh, Harry, Hi!” Elio yells to get Harry’s attention through the guys surrounding the arena.

I kick Elio who laughs as I walk to get my pair of boxing gloves. I wear the gloves and make my way towards one of the punching bags and start hitting the bag.

“How many times have I told you to protect your face?” Simon’s voice sounds annoyed at me before I even start, walking towards me with a face of annoyance.

“I barely started, Simon!” I roll my eyes as he leans his arm on my punching bag.

“I don’t care if you’re good at this, protecting your face is the most important thing. Now, stand in position!” He yells the last part and backs off from the bag as I take my position, raising my hands to my face in protection, steading my legs on the ground and start punching the bag.

“Now that’s a good girl!” Simon, loudly, encourages, clapping his hands. I keep on punching the bag, giving side punches from time to time.

“You punch like a girl.” That smirky voice I know very well by now.

I stop what I’m doing, panting, and look at the pair of green eyes that are standing near me.

“I’m a girl, want a taste?” I pant, chest and chin up. Harry’s arms are crossed on his chest, taking in how good I look in gym clothes.

“I don’t hit girls.” He smirks.

“Unfortunately, I hit boys.” I reply, giving him a punch in the face. He takes two steps backwards, holding his jaw that’s just received a punch, but his smirk fades for a second before it appears once again. Not that I punched him with my full power, I just wanted to prove a point.

“Woah, y/n, let’s slow down.” Simon says as I lock eyes with the smirky face.

“I’m gonna look for Elio.” I say, walking away to Elio who’s the one fighting now.

I can feel the pair of green eyes watching my every move as I walk towards the arena where Elio is having a boxing fight with one of the guys. Elio’s punches are good and precise, hitting the right spots and protecting his face all of the time, unlike me. An attacker is me, defender isn’t. Waiting for an attack so you can pull up your defense sounds so cowardly to me, attacking always sounds better.

Elio always gives his best during boxing and that’s what I see as I stand by the arena, watching him through the ropes that surround the square arena. The other guy has given Elio a punch that is totally a boxing foul, hitting him below the belt. Elio, as any boxer, falls down to his knees as he was totally caught off guard with such behavior during a match. I can feel the blood rushing into my head through my veins. No one is to hurt Elio as long as I’m alive, his dignity is mine. I skip through the arena ropes, making my way to Elio while the douchebag is laughing with his friends at the rule he has just broken.

“You did that on purpose!” I yell, helping Elio back on his feet.

“You need a crazy bitch defending you, now?” The guy laughs and I can only feel myself getting angrier. I let go of Elio and walk towards the guy. I will erase that smirk off of his face.

Throwing a powerful punch to his face, that I do, and right before he adjusts to this punch, I throw another punch under his belt, making sure I hurt him badly. Grabbing him by the neck with my forearm and tightening my arm around his neck, I let him fall with me on the arena, still strangling him, but as I feel myself slipping, I hold him closer by laying my legs on his body to keep my control. All he can do is try to hit my arm to force me to let him go, but that won’t happen.

“Do you know now that I’m a crazy bitch?” I whisper in his ear, tightening my grip around his neck. I feel Simon and Elio trying to save him from me.

“Let him go, Y/N!” Elio yells, grabbing me by the waist, but he only drags me and the guy back a little on the arena.

“Get off, Y/N, at once!” Simon yells at me, trying to grab the arm I have around the guy’s neck.

“Not before he apologizes!” I yell back, forcing the guy down.

The guy coughs with an open mouth due to the strangulation. “I-I’m s-sorry.” He manages.

With that, I let him go and immediately he runs away, tripping on his feet. I stand up, panting.

“Y/N, that’s not how we do things!” Simon sternly tells me, I only roll my eyes at his words.

My eyes drift to the guy who’s panting, holding his neck among his friends. I take off my glove and throw it at him, it lands on his head directly. Grunting, I get off of the arena, walking away and leaving Simon and Elio standing.

I take my things from the locker and storm away to the parking, not even bothering to take a shower. As I approach my car, the man I’m supposed to marry is leaning on it, arms crossed.

“Have anything to say, smirky?” I scoff, opening my backseat to throw the gym bag and slam the door close.

“You need to work on your anger issues.” He smirks as I stand in front of him.

This guy has a face created perfectly by God. His features could make hearts stop just so his features can be the last thing seen by the eyes of the beholder. Love is blind, but his handsomeness can be seen by the blind. And even though I hate him, I am incapable of not seeing his sweet face and admire every gene that made his face.

“Two things I can’t stand, smirky. One, being disrespected or underestimated. Two, someone harming Elio.” I say, holding up my fingers to count.

There is something about me that he can’t comprehend, though he is trying to. It must be the way I handle things in different situations, I can be all angry and violent, but still can maintain my temper and handle unbearable situations. Or it can be how tough I am, standing up to whoever. Certainly, these qualities make him, by all odds, curious.

“You’re beautiful, you know that?” His question, or rather, statement startle me a little. Indeed, I am beautiful, but I am told that I’m beautiful by an unexpected person. A person whom I just punched in the face for disrespecting me.

“I don’t have time for this.” I roll my eyes, but his face’s still keeping the same expression.

“I don’t care, I’m just spelling facts.” He says before patting on my shoulder and leaving with no other words.

Irritated, I am. But I can describe myself to be more startled than irritated. And as I stand there, only the voice of Elio brings me back to reality. On our drive back home, I repeat his words in my head just to understand what kind of situation was it. Getting a grip, I let my encounter with Harry slip off of my mind.

My mother is far

Far, far away

They tell him to find another

But he stays

They say, ‘You brought a daughter’

But he lies

They tell him, ‘That can’t be’

But he flies

Fly away

Far, far away

My mother is away

The ‘Away’ is dead

This is not the end

They say, ‘You brought a daughter’

The song Paolo used to sing me and Elio when we were young, keeps playing in my head as I stand in my kitchen after returning from a business trip. All is dead once the mother is dead. Losing a mother is the only thing that hurts you and leaves an open wound till the day you die. You can never be healed of losing the one person whom never felt love towards anyone like they felt towards you. A mother faces thousand hells to bring to the world one tiny person. All my mother did was give me the gift of life before leaving me, vulnerable, tiny, weak and in need of a mother. No blame is on Alessandra for leaving before I could pronounce ‘Mama’, but deep down I blame her for not giving me the gift of knowing who she was. There is, in my mind, the need to argue with her, fight with her, hug her and listen to her tell me that she loved me. I didn’t get the opportunity to know Alessandra, and though it may feel that people like me don’t get hurt as much of losing a mother, it still hurts. All the time, I feel like a prisoner to the grief of losing a mother I never had. Why did you leave me, mama?

My father once told me that losing a child is worse than losing a mother. He told me that losing a child is similar to having your heart snatched off of your chest. No one could imagine the pain, no other deaths could come closer to losing a child of your own and no matter what happened in life, you’d still feel the pain. You could no longer dream of them getting older before your eyes. The blame is the only thing you could do, blame your own child for dying and leaving your arms, blame God for taking them from you, blame the wings that flew them away from life. They take everything with them, your life, your age, and your happiness and they only leave you grief and bleak years.

That is why my father raised me to become the heir. Paolo wants me to fight and never risk me to life.

Paolo lost the love of his life, he cannot afford losing the love he can never replace. The love which was born by the love of his life. Me.

Bianca snaps me out of my thoughts, slamming a huge file on the kitchen counter in front of me. My eyes look at her floral, angelic aura and I see the big smile on her face as she opens the file to show me wedding dresses.

“You’re too busy to go find yourself a dress so I had the designer give me all the dresses he has in this file.” She smiles, going through the pictures of white wedding dresses.

“Do I look like I care, Bianca?” I arch an eyebrow at her, but she just shrugs at me.

“You need to choose one and come with me to the damned designer, or else I’ll make Elio force you.” She never curses, so she must be so irritated by me.

“You know I can take him.” I smirk and she rolls her eyes, playing with the strap of her floral dress.

“Y/n, I’m not kidding, the wedding is in two weeks! We already took care of everything else on your behalf, but the wedding dress can’t be chosen by anyone but you. Look! This one is so pretty.” She points at one white dress that I don’t like.

I huff. Bianca is right, they did take care of everything. I don’t even know where the reception or the actual wedding is going to be. “Fine.”

My fingers turn the pictures as Bianca squeals, clapping her hands, “Yay!”

As I look at a dress after another, I huff even more. This is not something I want to do. There is a dress catches my eyes, it’s not like me but I think it’s good.

The dress is silver-colored and can blind a blind with the sparkles, it’s off-shoulder and shows much cleavage just like I love dresses to show. The dress is huge, tight in the upper-half while the lower-half is huge. You can call it a ball gown wedding dress.

“I like this one.” I point at the picture and she turns her head to see the dress clearly.

“Oh, never thought you’d like a dress like that. It’s so pretty and sparkly!” She squeals at the end, closing the file. “I’ll make an appointment for today. Don’t even think you can get out of this, understand?”

I smirk as she walks away just to be replaced with the ringing of my phone. This number I know very well, it has been calling me for the past two months. I think, it’s time I answer.

Harry has been drowning in work. The Styles have been a thorn in his side, his uncles are turning against him, claiming that he’s no fit for the role. Trying his best to redeem his family members from betraying the family, but all efforts seem to vanish into thin air. While he is sitting in his office at the headquarters of the Styles Co., he hears the voice of his secretary through the phone speaker, “Mr. Styles, there’s a girl claiming that she’s your fianc- Ma’am, you can’t just ent-“

The door of his office suddenly slams open only for him to see my face. I stand there in my black bodysuit and black jeans, my hair falling down my shoulder freely. His eyes look me from head to toe, taking in how I am his fiancée. I can see why girls drool for guys like him, as he’s just as a delicious meal for a starving man. His attire matches mine, black shirt unbuttoned halfway and black dress pants.

His eyes look to the secretary who has followed me and he just nods at her. My eyes turn to look at her, as well. She gets out and closes door on her way. I turn my attention to him, crossing my arms.

“We need to go. Now.” I pull my chin up, ordering him.

His eyes speculate my appearance as they speculate my attitude. He gives me no expression, but inside he is trying to calm his curiosity. He sees a strong woman that stops at nothing, wants what she wants and gets what she wants. A woman that he barely knows, but still is pushing his buttons and talking like she has known him for years.

“Is that an order?” He smirks, crossing his arms, imitating my position. He gets more comfortable in his leather chair behind the modern desk.

“It can be if you don’t get your ass up. Alessandro has been calling me, he wants to see me alone. I can’t go alone, I have to have my gorgeous fiancé next to me. Just to prove a point.” I say, not giving him the expression which he’s craving so he can read me.

“Go on your own.” He says, briefly, before he gets back to typing on his laptop.

I free my arms, walking towards his desk and slam his laptop shut on his fingers, leaning in to be at the same level as his face, “Listen, smirky, Alessandro is not to be underestimated. If he threatens, then it has to be taken into consideration. If I go alone, then this messes up the whole point of the marriage.”

He frees his fingers and just admire the color of my hazel eyes while his damned smirk is not backing off of his face.

“I’ll go under two conditions.” He says as I straighten up my posture. I give no answer so he continues, “First, we will have a cup of coffee. Second, while we have our cup of coffee, you’ll tell me what is the history between you and that fucker.”

“Agreed. I’m waiting in my car.” I say, storming out of his office.

As he stays there, on his chair, in his office, he wonders. He wonders why I accepted his conditions without arguing my way out, he wonders if he’s going to like the story of me and Alessandro. He sighs, feeling the gun wrapped around his chest before he stands up to wear his suit jacket. He is the man, and I am the woman. We are not like Adam and Eve, we are the complete opposite, or so we think.

Harry and I can’t see what our parents see of us. We can’t see how we fit. We can’t see.

As I am scrolling on my phone, waiting for him in my car right in front of his company’s gate, the passenger door opens and he takes a seat next to me. I don’t even look at him, just as he closes the passenger door, I put my phone down and drive.

Harry notices that I’m a confident driver, driving with one arm just like him. Just like my driving, he notices how beautiful I am. The little makeup I have on doesn’t interrupt my beauty or put too much effort into making me more beautiful. To him, my hazel eyes that shine every time the rays of sun touch my eyes look like the sun after it rains. He doesn’t know that I see his eyes as the grass after a rainy day. We can’t see our similarities.

“Are you going to stare at me the whole day?” I ask, not taking my eyes off of the road.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea to meet him all by ourselves without backup?” He changes the topic.

“Alessandro won’t come with any guards, he thinks he’s going to meet me alone.”

“Are you used to meeting him alone?” He asks, trying to hide that the answer can annoy him.

“I’ll tell you all about it after we’re finished with meeting him.” I answer, trying to calm the urge to kill Alessandro once I see him.

Harry nods and focuses on anything but me. After a while of silence, I pull over by a bar. I grab my purse and open it to make sure I have my gun, then I reach down to feel the knife I’m hiding under my bodysuit. Harry watches me as I make sure I’m prepared and as I put on a leather black jacket on.

“Let’s go.” I say before we both get out of the car.

We walk, side by side, inside the bar. The smell of alcohol suffocates me as I enter. Desperate, lost souls wandering the place, looking for another drink to soothe their wounds of agony. This bar is built over the lost souls, not the ones looking for fun.

Harry’s eyes scan the place to make sure there are no signs of threats. I walk to Alessandro just when I notice his silver hair, he is sitting on a barstool, having a glass of whiskey on the rocks. I take my seat next to him and I feel Harry taking the seat next to me.

Alessandro’s face lightens up as he sees me, just to darkens when he sees the face next to me.

“Hey, Alessandro.” I say as I motion to the bartender. “Martini, please.”

“Whiskey. Neat.” Harry says to the bartender. As if having neat whiskey can make him have the upper hand in this situation.

“I didn’t know we were going to have a third-wheel.” Alessandro scoffs, turning his body to face me.

“You asked to see me, here I am.” I say, not changing my poker-face.

“She’s my fiancée, if you don’t know.” Harry smirks and Alessandro bites his bottom lip in ire.

“I am worthy of you, y/n.” Alessandro states, looking into my eyes.

“No, you’re not. I rather be with a devil than be with you, Alessandro. You know that by now.”

“Two years and you can’t just forget about it.” Alessandro’s voice is hurt.

I grab my glass and take a sip. “I don’t forget, as if what you do is forgettable.”

“I can’t see you marry this bastard, I am the one you’re meant to be with.” Before Harry does something, I reply.

“This bastard is my fiancé, Alessandro. Disrespect him and you disrespect me. You are an evil person, whether you admit it or not. All we had is gone, none of it matters anymore. You’re stealing members of the Styles and you’re causing chaos between us and the government. As a matter of fact, all you care about is to bring us all down just to prove a point.”

“It’s my right, y/n! Your families took everything from us and we were left with nothing. And I’m not here to talk about whatever the fuck is going on in business. I’m here because you can’t marry another guy you only met once.”

“Oh? Watch me. By the way, business is a part of why I don’t ever wanna see your face again.”

“You’re the reason I’m doing all of this!”

“Spare me the ‘You’re the reason I’m fucking people up’! You do all of this shit just for yourself. Do you think you’re gonna stop whatever you’re doing if I just ask?”

“Of course!”

“Your audacity, man!” I shake my head, sipping my drink. “You’re going to continue at all costs. And I am telling you, Alessandro, if you think I’ll let you fuck up the Styles and us, you’re damn wrong. We built the empire; Harry and I are going to keep building it. We’re going to become your worst nightmare, Alessandro. Just as much as I respect your threats, you must respect ours. You love me? Let’s see if you’ll love me when I suck your soul out. Your whole family won’t be enough for us, if you come near us again. I’ll make you regret the day you met me, you’ll wish you can rip your heart off. We’ll be the nightmare that visits you every day. “

His face is stunned, not believing that this is the girl he’s fallen in love with. The girl he’s loved his entire life is swearing to take him down. Enjoying her visits in his dreams will turn into fear. Alessandro can act tough as he wants, but we will turn him into a panicked chicken. He can stand tall, but we will make him fall. He can build walls, but we will crack them. Harry and I, all we have is our families, we won’t let Alessandro demolish it just to prove that he has the upper hand. Although Harry isn’t enjoying not being a part of the conversation, he’s enjoying listening to me involving him in my words. Alessandro’s heart aches as he watches the look of evil I own in my eyes towards him. Those same eyes that he has fallen in love with, contain the purest aversion. He wants to threat back, but he can’t do so to the love of his life.

“You want to marry him?” Alessandro asks with hurt eyes that’re trying to keep cool, nodding his head at Harry. As if Alessandro hasn’t been listening to my threats, he is only concerned with me.

“Yes, I want to and I will. Get out of the picture. I don’t ever wanna see you again.” Alessandro nods at my words before he looks at Harry.

“I’m not gonna let you have her.” Alessandro says to Harry.

Harry arches a brow and smirks, he holds my right hand up, “You see this? This is my ring wrapped around her finger. In two weeks, she’ll be my wife. I already have her, Alessandro.”

Throwing some dollar bills on the counter, Alessandro stands up. “I can never hurt you, y/n, even if I want to. You, Harry, on the other hand, it’ll be my pleasure to watch you suffer.”

With that he leaves me and Harry alone.

I WANT COMMENTS

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ohblackdiamond · 3 months

Note

For the wip game, please

Life and life only - what was the appeal of Victoria Medlin as a pivotal character and love interest over, say, one of Paul's better known past dalliances?

And in similar vein, what attracted you to the idea of writing Paul as a merman?

Thank you!

aw, thanks so much for the questions!

i picked victoria because she is one of the few women paul dated that he doesn't talk about at all in his book. i've only even read one interview from the nineties where he was even asked about her (his only response in the interview is "she killed herself," and then the interviewer changes the subject)-- it's not impossible there are more out there, but that's the only one i could find.

i find the omission interesting because, well, paul doesn't omit very many people from his autobiography and he has a tendency to drag almost everyone he does mention in there (even bruce the mensch managed to get complained about! paul said he farted a lot!). so my feeling is victoria was excluded for a reason-- either she was too painful for him to discuss or he thought talking about her was a little too exposing, or both. let me preface by saying paul has zero obligation to write/talk about any former lovers. however, i don't buy it being a case of her being overall insignificant to his love life-- otherwise, why dedicate his solo album to her (and j.b. fields') memory-- and why the dedication with no last name?

also, she just had that strange, sad aspect to her eyes in the youtube clips of her commercials and her few movie appearances. i liked her.

as far as the second question, what made me attracted to the idea of writing paul as a merman was it allowed me to explore aspects of paul's life that very rarely get written about. through the lens/conceit of being a mer, i was able to go in in a more frank way regarding his microtia and his isolation (i think social isolation as a child isn't something that people tend to focus on that goes a long way to explaining why paul stanley is the way he is) and relationship with julia.

i think i actually started writing the story when the rachael and julia allegations were starting up, and i remember thinking to myself, basically, that his relationship with julia was and always had been dysfunctional, but not in that particular, horrible way that was being claimed. obviously in my story it's very, very heavily fictionalized, but i wanted to look at the resentment julia might feel over having a brother with microtia and feeling that he was petted/spoiled/was hampering her at least in part because of it.

also, i just like mermaids in general and always have. it doesn't mean much (it doesn't mean anything), but paul and ace both wrote water-themed songs ("hard luck woman," "torpedo girl"), and both had weird near-drowning incidents in the seventies. ace has trouble walking, due to poor coordination, being kind of pigeon-toed, and, at the time, inebriation, but wouldn't it be more interesting if it was because he was actually a merman? and yeah, at this point, paul's stiff walk is probably because of his knee replacements, but wouldn't we rather it be from him being a merman, too?

the original fic was supposed to be an ace/gene/paul love triangle of sorts (not quite) where ace and paul were both mers, but paul had already landlocked and ace was about to. that might have been a more popular fic given it was slash all the way instead of het, but, well, i wanted to write one with victoria instead, haha.

thanks for the questions! really made me think!

#kiss fanfiction #fanfic asks

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mischiefmanaged71 · 2 years

Text

The Love Hypothesis (7/22) - Stephen Strange x Reader

Summary: Y/N Y/L/N is a PhD student who wants to prove to her best friend that she has moved on and dating. With no way to prove it, she kisses the first man she sees, which ends up being none other than Dr. Strange, known as one of the most unapproachable and critical professors in the university.

A/N: AU! Stephen Strange is a Professor/Doctor at Columbia University and reader is a Ph.D. student (Reader - 28, Stephen - 34). Credits to Ali Hazelwood for the original story. This work is a piece of fiction. I have no ownership over anything, this is ff.

Pairing: Stephen Strange X FEM! Reader

Word Count: 2.3K

Series Masterlist

As the time drew close to 11:00am, Y/N was almost done with Tom’s report. Organised under titles, size 12 font in Times New Roman, each section devoted to its designated focus area. Coming round to enter her lab, she glanced around the room, recognising the lack of women present. Despite trying her most to clear through the constant struggle of being a woman in STEM, she still found herself in a majority-male laboratory.

Her gaze fell on her lab mate, Greg, who planted himself on the chair opposite with an aggravated noise. “Everything alright?”

“Not. At all.” he grunted.

She offered a sympathetic look, “May I ask why?”

He made eye contact with her, leaning his elbows on the table as he gripped a pen tightly, “Your boyfriend happened.”

“Who?” she blinked and Greg all but, spat his name out.

“Strange.”

Chase, sat next to him, continued, “He’s on Greg’s dissertation committee.”

Her eyebrows raised, “Right. What happened?”

“He failed my proposal.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Greg.”

Greg ran a hand over his face, “This is going to set me back months. It’ll take so long to revise, because Strange just had to nit-pick. I didn’t even want him on my committee. Dr Xavier forced me to add him because he’s so obsessed with stupid computational stuff.”

Y/N sighed, not sure of what response she was supposed to give. “I’m really sorry to hear that.”

Chase cut in, wide-eyed, “Y/N, do you guys talk about this kind of stuff? Did he tell you that he wasn’t going to pass Greg?”

She gaped at him, “What? No. I-we don’t talk about that. It would be against regulations if he did.”

Greg continued on, “God. He is such a dick. Asshole.”

Y/N’s face hardened, hearing people talking about Stephen in that manner. From her end, they weren’t actually dating, but she still felt this sense of guilt and awkwardness, sitting here as they shit-talked her boyfriend.

“Did he tell you why he failed it? What do you need to change?”

“Everything. He wants me to change my control conditions, add another one, which will make the project more time-consuming. It’s not even just that-the way he said it-this air of superiority. He’s so arrogant and high-strung.”

Well, it wasn’t news, but it still hurt to hear. She wasn’t sure what else to say besides another apologetic look. “I’m sorry, that sucks.”

“Yeah, you should be.”

She narrowed her eyes, “Excuse me.”

Chase glanced between them, a tension filling the air. “You’re his girlfriend.”

“And? I am not him. I’m dating him. Do you see the distinction?”

“You’re fine with it all. How he acts - like an asshole on a power trip. You don’t give a shit about the way he treats people, otherwise you wouldn’t be able to stomach being with him.”

“Hey, now. Let’s not-”

Y/N stood from her chair, “No, Chase. Let him.”

Greg and Chase both paused, watching Y/N with a cautious look.

“I didn’t fail you, Greg. That was Dr. Strange.”

“Maybe, but you don’t care that half of the department lives in fear of your boyfriend either.”

She clenched her jaw, leaning her hands against the bench “You know what your problem is? Instead of focusing on making your project better, you're too focused on your pride. Maybe that’s more to do with you, than a professor with a few suggestions.”

“You obviously don’t give a shit about anyone but yourself.”

Y/N rolled her eyes, “What the hell do you want?”

“Get him to stop failing us.”

She laughed, right in his face “Greg. You’re asking the impossible. How is that a rational response for you to have in response to Stephen failing you-”

“Stephen?” he repeated back, watching her meet his gaze and slink back to her side of the bench.

“Yes. Stephen. What else should I call my boyfriend? Professor Strange?” she narrowed her eyes in frustration.

“If you were a half decent person or ally to any grad, you would just dump him.”

“Do you realise how stupid you sound?”

With no other reason to stay, Greg left the room and Y/N found herself inhaling deeply and allowing her eyes to fall shut.

“He doesn’t mean all of those things, at least about you. He’s just really upset about the review.”

She huffed, “Yeah, whatever.”

“It’s not personal. It’s just...Strange is notorious for failing projects. You know of his reputation, yes?” she nodded in response. “Now you guys are dating and...it shouldn’t feel like a matter of taking sides, but it can feel like it, you know?”

Y/N looked down, unsure of what to feel. Those words stuck with her for the rest of the day as Y/N ran through her schedule. Among her friends, Sam and James had unpleasant experiences with Stephen. After the initial shock of the news, they got over it and it seemed normal. Now, this new perspective shook her for a moment as she thought it over. Tugging her phone from her pocket, she ran through the contacts and to the one she saved under his name.

Y/N: Did you just fail Greg?

She didn’t expect a quick response, but her phone buzzed almost immediately.

Stephen: Y/N?

Y/N: Yes, it’s me. Did you fail Greg Cohen? I ran into him after his meeting with you and he was very distraught.

Stephen: I can’t discuss other grad’s dissertation meetings with you.

Y/N: I know. I’m not asking you to tell me anything. Greg already used me as a punching bag, so it was pretty clear how he felt.

Y/N: Because I’m your 'girlfriend'

Because of you. Because we're dating

A moment passed as Stephen was typing.

Stephen: Committees don’t fail students. They fail their proposals.

She huffed.

Y/N: Tell that to Greg, Stephen.

Stephen: I did. I explained to him the weaknesses in his study. He’ll write up a new proposal and then I’ll sign it off for his dissertation.

Y/N: So you admit that it was your decision to fail his proposal?

Stephen: Yes, currently, his proposal is not going to find anything of scientific value.

Y/N sighed, staring at the screen. How could he just ignore the fact of the situation? Fragments of her previous conversation flickered in her mind and she took the plunge.

Y/N: Couldn’t you have tried to word it in a nicer way?

Stephen: Why?

Y/N: I don’t know, maybe so he wasn’t so upset. He seemed very angry.

Stephen: My job isn’t to coddle grad students. He’s in a Ph.D. program. He’ll be inundated his whole life if he can’t take a bit of feedback on his project.

Y/N: Still, maybe try not to look like you enjoy delaying his graduation.

Stephen: The reason he needs to revise his proposal is because it’s set up to fail in its current state. My job on the committee is to provide feedback and that is what he got.

Y/N: Do you realise you fail more people than anyone else? Your criticism is unnecessarily harsh. You have to know how grads view you.

Stephen: I don’t.

Y/N: Antagonistic. And unapproachable.

A moment passed before he began typing again and the message flickered on her screen.

Stephen: My job is to ensure we nurture researchers and scientists, not clutter academia with terrible and mediocre scientists. I could care less about how your friends perceive me if I work up to standard. Not everyone has what it takes to be a scientist.

Y/N stared at the screen, her heart hammering in her chest with each word. She had barely slept properly the last few weeks because of her report and extra work. Hearing those words repeated back to her was not only disappointing, but filled with a sense of inferiority as the words blinked at her.

She had to make this path especially for herself just to be accepted into a position in the program. So it was easy for her to simply leave him on read.

***

“Go right.”

“Got it.” Sam flicked the turn signal, “Going right.”

“Don’t listen to Steve. Go left.” Natasha said.

Steve leaned forward and swatted Natasha’s arm, “Don’t listen to her, Nat’s never been to this farm. It’s on the right.”

“Oh, my god.” Y/N exclaimed, “I’ve got Maps open and its says...” she trailed off, “its on the left.”

“Google maps is wrong.” Steve replied.

“It can’t be wrong.” Y/N’s face scrunched.

“What do I do?” Sam made a face to Y/N in the rear-view mirror as she held her phone. “Left or right, Y/N?”

“Right. If it’s wrong, we circle back.” She quickly shot Nat an apologetic look, but she knew Steve wore a smug look.

“That’ll make us late. God, I had these stupid picnics.” Sam groaned.

“We’re already one hour late. I doubt being any later will make a difference.”

Her stomach grumbled after rushing out to meet up with the group. The argument with Stephen almost made her skip, but then they would all know. She could’ve used the time to work in the lab, but now she was here.

“Don’t worry, Sam. We’ll get there eventually. Oh god, why is it so hot? I brought sunblock, by the way. No one is going anywhere until they put it on.”

When the arrived, the picnic was bustling around, faculty members crowded around a station, grads mingling and playing sports. Making eye contact with Dr. Xavier, Y/N happily waved and smiled. Glancing over at the various games going on, she watched another group in a circle.

“What are they playing?” she squinted, the sun catching her eyes.

Nat responded, handing Y/N the bottle of sunscreen “Ultimate frisbee. I don’t know.”

“Sounds fake.”

“You know what isn’t?”

“What?” she looked at Nat.

“Melanoma. Now, put the sunscreen on.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Y/N grinned, taking the bottle, “Is there any food left?”

“None if you don’t count corn bread.”

“Do not eat that.” Steve replied, “Jess said that a pharmacology major first-year sneezed all over it. Where did Sam go?"

“Parking-holy shit!”

“What?” Y/N jumped, looking around before returning to Nat, “What, Nat?”

“Holy. Shit.” she grabbed Y/N’s face and shoved her in the direction ahead of her. Her eyes widened, heart racing all too fast at the sight.

“Is that Strange?” Steve remarked, “Is that him running around shirtless?”

“Shit. Is that a six-pack?” Nat exclaimed, looking at Y/N with a bewildered look. Y/N stared in amaze all the same as he moved around under the sun.

“Is he actually sculpted that way?” Nat nudged Steve.

Sam arrived back, without food, of course. “Was that under his shirt the entire time he was destroying my dissertation? Y/n/n, you didn't tell us he was ripped."

Y/N was just as stumped, glued to the ground. Arms limp at her sides, she remained frozen while staring at his form. She had seen the outline of his body, but not-never like this.

“Unbelievable.” Nat grabbed the bottle, squeezing the sunscreen onto her hands, “I’ll start putting on your arms and you do your legs.”

“Nat, calm down. I’ll get to it.”

“Quick, before you get too much exposure.”

The others were throwing around questions about the actual studies on melanoma and skin cancer, but she wasn’t listening. Y/N was still absorbed in her boyfriend, forgetting to correct herself, and just where he had to be right now. She wished to be anywhere else right now.

Nat suddenly squeezed another large amount of slabbed it into her hand. “Hey!”

“There. Now you are protected against carcinoma. Sounds scary on its own.”

“Ugh. This is so oily.” Y/N groaned, “What am I supposed to do all of this? Where did Sam go?”

“He’s over there with Jordan.”

“Jordan?”

“Yeah, she’s a fifth-year-”

“Oh, my god, guys. Fix this now, Nat before I dump it on your head.”

Natasha rolled her eyes, “Alright. Alright, you are so dramatic.” waving her hand to someone behind Y/N, “Hey! Dr. Strange! Have you put on sunscreen yet?”

Y/N’s eyes bulged, wanting to hide as Nat continued to wave him over. In the span of a few seconds, she wished desperately to strangle her friend. Her brain told her not to turn around. “No.” she heard him say from afar.

Spotting the pile in Y/N’s hands, it was pretty obvious what Nat had intended as she smiled at Y/N knowingly. “You do realise how inappropriate this would be, right?” she hissed.

“Why?” Nat blinking at her innocently, “I put sunscreen on Steve all the time,” squeezing an amount and slapping his face. “I am putting sunscreen on my boyfriend. Do you think its inappropriate to protect him from getting melanoma?” Am I inappropriate?” she shone.

Y/N would murder her when they were alone.

Finally turning to Stephen, she met his eyes for the first time since their argument and it all seemed to dissipate away. She would have apologised, but this was out of her control now. Nat had a radar for this sort of thing now. She waved and he nodded, throwing the frisbee to Dr. Reyes, “I’m taking five!”

They were really doing this in front of everyone.

“Hey,” he said once he was close enough.

“Hey,” she tried to avoid looking at his chest but it was right there in front of her. “Can you turn around?”

He paused before following her request. “Duck a bit.” she suggested.

Soon enough, she was slathering the sunscreen on his back, trying hard not to think about all of the people staring at them. It wasn’t the first time she touched him before, but the intimacy of touching someone’s skin was a little uncomfortable in front of all these people. Many, of which, she knew. Faculty included.

“This probably isn’t a good time, but I’m probably running out of apologies for these weird situations.”

“It’s fine.” she felt the vibration of his voice against her hand as she moved to cover his shoulder.

“Really though. I don’t know what it is...” she trailed off.

“It isn’t your fault,” he continued, a slight change in his voice that she caught.

“Are you alright?” she froze up.

“Yeah,” he nodded, although she was hesitant to move on.

“How much do you hate this on a scale of the scenarios we’ve found ourselves in? Where does slathering sunscreen on you in front of the entire science cohort fall?”

“I don’t hate it. And this isn’t your fault. Again.” he repeated.

“This is probably the worst thing-”

“It isn’t, Y/N. These things will continue to keep happening.” he turned to look at her, a hint of amusement in his eyes at her discomfort.

“Figures.” she huffed, blowing her hair from her face, the breath brushing Stephen’s face. He stole some of the sunscreen from her palm and rubbed it on his chest. Dr Xavier was probably watching them, along with the rest of the Ph.D. program. “I am regretting befriending Nat right about now. She’s getting out of control.”

She ducked around to get the front of his shoulders, “Hey, at least that part of our plan is working out. The Department chair definitely can’t miss this. You looked like you were having fun.” brushing the sunscreen along his collarbone.

Her face burned, freezing as he paused “I meant playing frisbee. Or whatever.”

“Beats small talk.”

“Hey, you’re doing fine now.” she mustered a smile. “You must have played sports growing up, I suppose. Explains why you’re-”

“Antagonistic. And unapproachable?”

Her smile dropped, faltering to a guilt expression as she froze up. She looked down from her stance, “I’m sorry about that. I didn’t mean to-”

Catching the slightest curve of his mouth, she tilted her head and huffed out a breathy laugh, “You little s-” she would have slapped the rest on his head if not for his grin that caught her off-guard.

She shook her head. So what if he was attractive and handsome. That was a fact. Just an observation that she had taken into account. Nothing more.

Once she was done with the sunscreen application, she rubbed her hands together, “Alright. Good to go, Dr. Antagonistic.”

“Thanks.” he remarked, “Thank Nat, I guess.”

“Not gonna happen.” she replied, a smirk on her face as she gestured for him to go back to his game.

“What do you think is next?”

“Maybe she’ll elevate her game.”

“Hand holding.”

“Fake-move in together.”

“Fake wedding.”

“Fake-honeymoon?”

Y/N laughed, but the way he looked at her threw her off. It was attentive and curious. The way one might focus on every word.

“Hey, Y/N,” she turned to Tom who approached them. He too was shirtless and fit, and yet for some reason or another, she didn’t see to care.

“Hi, Tom. Loved your talk the other day.” she smiled.

“It was good, wasn’t it? Did Stephen tell you about our change of plans?”

Her smile faltered, “What change of plans?”

“We’ve made progress on the grant, so were going to Boston next week. We’ll finish setting up the stuff on the Harvard side.”

She slowly nodded, understanding and yet felt a disturbance as Stephen forgot to mention it. Or he chose not to. Either case, she was pushing it aside. He was a grown man and he didn’t necessarily have to tell her everything in his life. It wasn’t as if she were his real girlfriend anyway.

“That’s great news.” she smiled warmly, “How long will you be gone for?”

“Just a few days.” Tom’s tone was quiet, “Would you be able to send your report by Saturday so we can discuss it while I’m still here?”

Something sparked in her chest as she blinked at him numbly. She forced a smile on her face, “Sure, course. I’ll send it to you Saturday.” She surely wouldn’t sleep at all this week.

She mumbled under breath, “No problem.”

“Perfect.” Tom winked, but it was anything but. “You going back to play?” he turned to Stephen who nodded and followed.

Shuffling back to her friends was the awkward moment of scanning for watching eyes after what had happened.

“So, what’s he like?”

“Who?”

“Strange.” Nat asked, “I should say Stephen, shouldn’t I? You don’t call him Dr. Strange do you? Because if you’re into that-I do not need to know.”

“Natasha.” she blinked, aghast at the implication.

“Yeah, I’m curious. How is he any different when he’s with you? Or does he also critique the font size for the labels of your x and y-axis?”

A smirk appeared on her mouth as she imagined him saying just that. “No. Haven’t gotten that yet.”

“What is he like, then?”

“He’s...” she paused, staring off.

“He’s?” Nat pressed.

“You know.”

“We don’t. There must be more than meets the eye. He’s so moody and negative, and angry-”

She wet her lips, interrupting Nat “He’s more than you guys think. He isn’t like that. He can be some of those things, sometimes. Just as the rest of us.”

“If you say so.” Nat shrugged, “How did you even meet? You never told me."

"We just talked and then got coffee. And then..."

"How does that happen?" Steve interrupted, "How does one accept a date with Strange? Before seeing him half-naked, that is. He's not exactly the most inviting character."

You kiss him. You kiss him twice and then he's helping you convince all of your friends that you're in love. He is saving you and buying you coffee. He's calling you a smart-ass and calling you out on your weirdly specific questions. And then you insult him and probably ruin it all.

"He asked me out and I said yes." She repeated to them, staring almost defiantly to make them believe it.

"You didn't meet on Tinder?"

She sighed, "No. I'm not even on Tinder."

"So...does that imply Strange was?"

She rolled her eyes, "No it does not."

"I suppose his profile would be very bland anyway." Nat remarked.

"Who is saying we met on Tinder?"

"Everyone. Someone said Craigslist." Sam cut in, tracking back to the group, although his gaze was set on Hayden Reyes in the distance.

"Craigslist?"

"Not saying that people believe it."

"Who are these people you're talking about? And why do they care about my relationship?"

Nat brushed her shoulder, "Don’t worry. This will all blow over and all the rumours will die. Dr. Moss and Sloane had a very public argument about..." She drew an arm around Y/N, "Hey. Everything will be fine."

"I know some people may be hyper fixated on this, but Steve, Sam and I - we are so happy for you." she added.