#like i want it still so much but im learning to release it into God's hands | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

xbruised-peachx · 9 months

Note

I NEED MORE GROMSKO SHIBARI IVE BEEN RE READING THAT SECTION FOR DAAAYS (specifically him in shibari you wrote it so good please 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺)

𝔾𝕣𝕠𝕞𝕓𝕒𝕣𝕚

bc this has been rotating in my mind for a while as well (apologies to anon im sure this was written a while ago but i finally got to it so!) render by me, full version on my pat :3c Word Count: 3,946 Tags: Shibari/Ropeplay, fem!reader, denial/slight edging, lots of teasing, language kink (reader only slightly knows Polish aka me I've been learning lol), slight size kink, riding, creampie, not proofread (aka eve is gonna kill me for the Polish in this fic LMAO) Translations at the end 🔞+ STORY MDNI

“Here... Let me just...” He was talking under his breath, trying to adjust the meters of rope to find the middle. It wasn’t perfect, not some nice silky rope either, he said he didn’t want that. Instead it was brown and twine-like, like the one that always hung around his waist. He folded it again, leaving it in a nice quarter for you, or at least as close as he could get from just eyeballing it. “There... Now, we’re at step one.”

He chuckled softly as you looked off to your side, a printed guide with many steps over there. He gave you the rope, a look of sympathy on his face. You probably weren’t hiding your nerves too well from his expression. He gave you a soft kiss on the cheek, unable to stop smiling as he did. “Masz to, kochanie... I trust you, you know that...”

You smiled, nodding as you met his eyes after looking up from the instructions. “I know... Hmmmph... But the first step is having your arms behind your back. How are you gonna help me like that?”

He chuckled again, shrugging his shoulders. “I mean... kind of the point of it is that I’m slightly helpless but here...” He bounced his leg slightly, signaling for you to get off his lap. It made you laugh slightly as a jolt of pleasure ran up your spine, no doubt he had other motives as well as you were both undressed. His thick thigh rubbing against your pussy released just a little bit of tension from you. He turned once you were off, facing the instructions as he held his arms in position behind him. You held the bite of the rope cautiously, looking slightly over his shoulder. “I’ll try and tell you, and I’ll tell you the knots, just like we practiced.”

You nodded, still looking over his shoulder, your nose resting on it as you slowly pulled the bite under both his arms, letting the ends hang down. You pulled up on the bite, giving yourself some more room as you started to wrap it around his wrists three times. He told you himself he’d probably need more reinforcement, even if he didn’t resist you. He was a big, strong military man, through and through. But, God, it made you want to see his big body tied up even more. You tried to not fantasize too much in your head as you wrapped, just wanting to experience it all first hand. You kissed the back of his shoulder as you lifted up, letting your breath linger with your smile against his skin as you looked back at the strong rope holding him. “Okay... what knot first, Sobi?”

He cleared his throat lightly, taking a deep breath as he looked down at the notes. “Mmm... I’d say a box tie.” You nodded, remembering him showing you all the types of knots and ties you could do safely. He joked while showing you, saying the military was useful for more than just survival to him... that it was finally coming into use in the bedroom. He felt you tighten it, nodding to give approval that it felt good, secure and not too tight. “Now just wrap it around my left arm, bring it around my chest, then around the right.”

You remembered him saying not to place it too low so it wouldn’t hurt him, nor too high lest it just slip down. Cautiously, you brought it up and around, letting it touch his bicep before lightly pulling it across his chest as your other arm held it onto his bicep. “Right here?”

“Hmm...” Still able to move his arm slightly, he wiggled it slowly, making your hand softly caress his flexing bicep in the process. From the outside looking in, he didn’t seem ripped, but easily he could out-lift anyone he knew, his strong abs and muscles protected by a nice, soft layer of fat that made him so inviting to you. Like your own big teddy bear. “A little higher, like... above the bicep, barely where my shoulder ends... if that makes sense.”

You nodded, listening to him, he had to know himself the best. Slowly, with your arm still caressing him, you pushed the rope up. You heard him take a deep breath out of his nose, truly taking in the feeling of your soft hands against him, your naked body pressed against him. You pushed it even more, leaning up to his ear as you continued pulling the rope across his chest with your other hand. “Like this~?”

He gasped softly as the rope wrapped softly around his other arm, around the same area, taking in the feeling of your soft hands and the rough rope. “Tak~... Y-yes, I like it, kochanie...” His eyes were shut, only cracking open as you started to chuckle.

“No, no... like, ‘jak to?’ As in, is it okay there for position?”

“Oh... heheh, y-yeah, feels perfect there.”

He looked back at you, already his pupils starting to dilate from pleasure. “Mmmm...” you playfully scolded him, “you’re already losing yourself, baby. Got to keep it together, we’ve barely even started.”

He pouted back at you, just playing into the lighthearted joking. “I know... Mmm~... I guess you’re just a natural at it... already making me feel good.” He smiled at you, giving you a wink as you started blushing. He looked down at the instructions, squinting at the next step before taking a harsher breath out. “O, ja pierdolę... right, you have to go around more times now... So, uh, you’ll go under that one on my left and just wrap around... Don’t tease me too much, please, kotku?”

You smiled devilishly, doing as he said, pulling the rope under, but letting your fingers trail up his arm to his shoulder as you pulled it around. “No promises...” As you pulled the rope around his chest, you let your fingers interlace on the rope. They trailed gently across him, his soft hair and chest being teased, also acting as a double check to make sure it wasn’t too tight. He rolled his neck back, a soft kurwa escaping his lips as he loved your delicate touch against him, contrasting beautifully against the ropes that bound him, hugging his body roughly, but also comforting. You chuckled, catching his mouth as he leaned back, continuing to pull the rope around. Instantly, the kiss was deepened as he groaned softly in your mouth, his tongue trying to enter as soon as he could. He was desperate, even now, even just at the beginning. It was cute in its own way, but you couldn’t let him have everything, especially with the way he teases you himself. You let your tongue meet his for a moment, but quickly pulled away with a cheeky grin, watching as his face turned from confusion to frustration, letting out a little huff out of his nose. You looked over his shoulder at the directions again, because lord knew he wasn’t looking.

You pulled the rope under the stem, leading it over and around, then over and around again, until you repeated on the stem. It was hard to read the instructions from here, but you could tell the knot was secure but adjustable. He took a deep breath, leaning his head up slowly as he looked back at the directions himself. He attempted to wiggle his arms, but couldn’t get much of anywhere, ensuring it was perfect. He smiled softly as he read. “Okay... there’s another rope over there, you’re gonna attach it to the other one. Remember the ‘lark’s head’ knot?” You nodded, reaching over to grab the other long rope he had already prepared for you.

“It’s so nice how prepared you are, Sobi,” you smiled, genuinely complimenting him. He smiled softly, chuckling in response.

“Mmm, what can I say? A lovely lady like you who trusts me with her heart asks me if it’s okay to do one of my fantasies? Heh... Am I not supposed to make her life easier?”

You smiled, pulling down on the knot as tight as you could to keep it secure. “You say that like it isn’t a fantasy of mine as well... You’ve tied me up and just... I wanted to see you in it.”

He looked back at you, a smile on his face as his cheeks flushed red softly. “How are you liking it so far?”

“Better than I imagined even,” you said with a big smile on your face, pulling the rope around his arm, this time going under his chest, your pinky playfully twirling in the hair on his chest leading down to his stomach. “I really love how it looks on your arms... Mmm, you already know how much I love hanging off them as is, so...”

He laughed softly, his laugh trailing into a heavier breath as your fingers continued dancing softly on his skin. “That you do... I imagine we have a similar feeling when I wrap it around your thighs, see that little bit of squish.”

“Probably it’s something similar... but your arms are too firm to squish,” your voice trailed off, bringing one of your hands up to run along his bicep again as you brought the rope around a second time, leaning up to his ear, letting your breath softly trace the shell of it. “So big and strong... everytime I touch you like this I just... mmm~, I want those arms doing something else to me.”

He smiled a devilish smile, just barely turning towards you as you slowly nuzzled yourself in the crook of his neck. “Mmm~, and you are worried about me getting worked up? Seems you are working yourself up, kochanie... I can feel your hips rubbing on my back right now.”

You hadn’t even noticed it, but he was right. A blush further spread across your cheeks as you backed away, finishing pulling the rope around. You did the same sort of securing, pulling it up and around a few times around all three branches of the rope. Looking back over his shoulder, he beat you to it, leaning to read himself. “Now’s time for the front.”

You smiled widely at him as he gave you a knowing glance. “Lap time again?”

He shook his head softly, “Not quite, it’s just you have to wrap it around my shoulders in the front, then you can get back in my lap... Trust me, I want it more than anything right now.”

You chuckled softly, pulling the rope through his arm to the front, starting to wrap to his shoulder. “Hehe... I can tell,” you said as you looked down to his growing hard on. It was clear he was into this, his tip pink and barely poking out. You smiled deviously, reaching down with your free hand to pull lightly to get his foreskin fully out of the way, making him quickly suck a breath through his teeth at not only your touch, but the feeling of the air hitting his sensitive tip.

“K-kurwa~! Kotku, I-... shit, you can’t just do that without warning...”

You smiled, feeling a little guilty but you knew he wasn’t too serious, just frustrated from all the teasing... how the tables have turned on him so suddenly. “Mmm~... sorry, you just looked like you needed just a little release...” You pulled the rope over his shoulder and to his back, pulling around and under to meet his other arm, pulling it through. “You seem so pent up, Sobi. Am I wrong?”

You tilted your head cutely as you asked him a question, sitting at his side as you sat there, waiting for his answer. He shook his head, his eyes almost pleading with you as he met yours. “No... God, no you aren’t. I really need this, baby please...”

You smiled at him, pity in your expression as you pulled the rope over his shoulder, reaching the end of it. There was one more rope left, this one a little shorter than the other two. You leaned over his lap, arching your back to tease him more. Your breast against his thigh as you read the instructions, your ass in the air so tantalizing to him, he groaned, cursing under his breath and making you smile more. “O mój kurwa boże...”

“Hmmm...” you played ignorant of your teasing, just reading what comes next in the directions. “Oh! Now it’s lap time!”

“Ohhh... great~...” His voice dripped with sarcasm as he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. You couldn’t help but laugh softly at him not being able to take such teasing. Though you suppose, this was a whole different level for him; rather than him just touching along your inner thighs, teasing the outside of your lips, or making his hand go the same pace as your grinding hips. His hands were literally bound as you were bent over in front of him so alluring, your naked body literally right within reach, but was physically incapable of being the palm of his hands.

You tied the last rope in the back, pulling it up and through his arm then letting it dangle, the rope tickling at his thighs. He bit his lip as you saw you readjust, coming back around to his front. Meeting his eyes, you picked up the rope, letting the end graze along his thighs in a tantalizing way, holding it in your other hand as you came to straddle his lap. He looked you up and down, his breath getting heavier moment by moment, seeing how close you were to him, hell, even able to feel the heat from your pussy as it sat inches away. “Don’t tease me too much... I know I keep saying it but... Kurwa, I don’t know how much more I can take...”

His voice trailed off into a more desperate tone, almost sounding like he was whimpering, begging you to give him what he so desperately wanted. You only gave him a pitiful smile, “I’ll try... But it’s a little... hard when I feel you so excited under me. Mmm~...” You let your hips just barely scoot forward on him, earning a groan from him but you said to yourself it was just you adjusting as you pulled the rope across the right under the opposite collarbone. “ It’s just so tempting...”

He chuckled, barely bucking his hips up to yours, making you gasp softly and nearly lose your grip on the rope. “I can say the same for you, kochanie~... So, so tempting...”

You giggled, feeling his cock nestled right at your entrance but unable to enter. Unintentionally, he just led himself into this little trap... a little trap that left him yearning to be inside you even more. “It’s only a little more, miśku... then I’ll have my way with you...” You let your hands trail more on him as you pulled the rope across to the other side, going over then under, making sure to take your time tying a decorative knot at the front of him. You watched him intently as his chest rose and fell rhythmically, despite the deep breaths he was taking. His own eyes watched as your small, delicate hands tied the twine on him, watching those perfect hands expertly work the frayed, imperfect rope.

He whined softly as he wiggled his hands, feeling your wet pussy pressed against him. He knew you wanted this, though your hands went slow, it was just to mess with him more. So you could just feel him get harder under you. He didn’t even think he could get so turned out, but the harsh ropes binding him, making it so he couldn’t touch you. He could only groan in frustration, though the denial only excited him more.

You pulled the rope under the one by his arm and pulled through his arm, letting it rest behind him. You leaned up to his ear, unintentionally grinding yourself on him again as your sultry voice whispered in his ear, “Just one more knot... then I’m done.”

His breath hitched as you spoke, his hips desperately rising to meet yours again, anything to help with this painful hard-on he had. But you didn’t help at all, wrapping your arms around him and leaning over his shoulder, nuzzled close by his neck as you tied the final knot. So close to him, you were able to hear the little whines he let out under his breath as he grinded himself into your core. You bit your lip, suppressing yourself from letting out your own moan. “Pragnę cię tak bardzo, kochanie... Pr-... Pleeeaase~...” He desperately whined as he grinded himself further into your now sopping wet cunt, trying to tie that knot faster as you couldn’t resist him anymore either.

You finally finished it off, pulling your arms out from around him and immediately locking them around his neck, pulling him close as you kissed him messily. He didn’t help at all with the mess, barely able to control himself as he pushed himself into you, his tongue running along your bottom lip within seconds. You welcomed him in though, fingers interlacing with the bottom of his hair as you pulled him even closer.

Still grinding, even with your tongues interlocking, he was wanting so much more. He pulled away his eyes half lidded as his pupils dilated with lust. “Proszę, baby, fuck me already~... Boże, I can feel how wet and I just... Potrzebuję cię, kochanie~... I’ll do anything...”

His begging turned you on even more, it made you not want to do as he said... just so you could hear it more. But you couldn’t resist it either. Slowly you pulled yourself off his lap, just to tease him more, build more anticipation in him. He helped out, wiggling his hips down the bed more so they were parallel with it. You reached down to him, holding him by the base, feeling it throb with just your fingers as you lined yourself up. Slowly slipping your entrance on him, you expect some more resistance with the lack of foreplay, but after a couple little pushes, you were able to take him in, moaning as you slowly slid down, taking him to the base. He watched for as long as he could, until he just succumbed to his own pleasure, moaning softly and closing his eyes, head falling back just barely. You smiled devilishly, seeing him already losing himself in you. You wait for his eyes to open, looking at you with such desire before you asked, “...You ready?”

He chuckled softly, biting his lip as he bucked his hips up, egging you on to continue, “As ready as ever... How about you?”

You rolled your eyes at him light-heartedly, putting your hands on his shoulders as you slowly moved up. “Mmm~... maybe I should tie your legs next time too.”

He laughed, letting out a deep exhale through pursed lips, “Don’t know about that one, baby... Nggh~... already... hard enough as is.” As you slid back down, he leaned forward, getting right by your ear as you gasped, him doing another little thrust to push himself deeper inside. “Nie masz pojęcia, co mi zrobiłeś... How badly I want to grab your hips and fuck you so hard right now.” His voice came out as a growl... so deep and nearly threatening... but with him restrained, he was unable to act on such empty threats of good times.

“Heheh~... But your hands are tied, quite literally...” You ran your hands down his shoulders, running them down to where the ropes crossed in front, holding onto that for balance as you pulled yourself up again. He groaned, kissing onto your jaw as he cursed under his breath. “I’m the one in control here, Sobi... Mmm~, and I’ll fuck you so good if you just sit back and enjoy it...”

You felt him nod softly, lifting off your jaw as he met your eyes again, reaching right by his head before going down again, starting your rhythm of riding him. He watched you carefully as you took him in so expertly, his mouth sitting slightly agape as his breath got heavier. You started to roll your hips, earning a more needy moan from him as his head went back, and you saw slightly behind him, his hands balling into fists as his moan turned to a whimper. You felt so powerful right now, turning this huge, strong man to whining and begging under you, despite you still having to look up at him as you hit the tip of his cock. That thick hard cock too... you couldn’t get enough of it. When your hips rolled just right, it hit that spot inside that had you shutting your eyes as well, clinging even harder on the ropes. So focused on riding him, you could only let out heavy pants but once he bucked his hips, seeing him hit the spot inside you, you couldn’t help but cry out, cursing under your breath.

As you continued, he kept up his own little thrust inside you, making you moan more and more. Part of you wondered if he was chasing his own climax, or if he was just trying to make you feel good. Everytime you moaned though, breathily saying his name, you would see his arm wiggle, shoulder desperately trying to reach to you but being unsuccessful. He pulled himself forward, resting his head on the crook of your neck as he moaned more, his thrusts getting slightly more erratic. “Mój Boże~... proszę, baby... I’m so... Kurwa~, I’m so fucking close, are you?”

You giggled softly, feeling yourself on the edge but just barely there yourself. “Just about~... Ahh~! I-I’ll get there soon, just finish whenever, babe...”

“C-can I cum inside you? Please, please, please, kochanie, I want to so badly, pleeeeaase~...” He desperately whined, whimpering as he started to increase the pace of his thrusts, making you moan and your own climax approached just as quickly.

You giggled softly, leaning over to whisper in his ear. “Oh~... you will finish inside me... Nggh~... Come on, Sobi... Do it, cum inside me make me yours~”

Those words pushed him over the edge, biting onto your shoulder as he pushed down as hard as he could, cumming with a growl that turned quickly to a whimper. Erratically pushing himself deeper inside with little thrusts, you felt the warmth go even deeper inside you. Those deep thrusts against you nearly sent you over the edge, but as he slowly came down from his high, he pulled back, thrusting harshly as he let out one final spurt of cum right into your g-spot. Feeling that warmth all pressed against you, you hit your climax, moaning out his name as you came. He admired the sight, finally coming down fully to see you shaking, bouncing slightly on his still hard cock. He kissed your neck, encouraging you as you came down. “So good, kochanie... You fucked me so well, kotku... Moja piękna dziewczyna~... so beautiful cumming for me...”

You caught your breath, coming down to his wonderful words, leaning over and catching his lips as they lifted, bringing him in for a much more passionate kiss. When you leaned back, opening your eyes slowly, the both of you were smiling, unable to hold back the love you felt just from gazing at each other.

“Thank you, kochanie...” He wiggled his arms, making sure you could see it. “Now, could you uh... untie me? I just want to hold you now...”

Translations! Masz to, kochanie- You got this, baby Tak- Yes Jak to- Like this, jak being the comparative "like" rather than the enjoyment "like" O, ja pierdolę- Oh, fuck me Kotku- kitty/kitten Kurwa- fuck O mój kurwa boże- Oh my fucking god Miśku- bear (diminutive) Pragnę cię tak bardzo, kochanie- I want you so bad, baby Proszę- Please Potrzebuję cię- I need you Nie masz pojęcia, co mi zrobiłeś- You have no idea what you've done to me Moja piękna dziewczyna- My beautiful girl

#call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #cod mw2 #gromsko #gromsko mw2 #gromsko x reader #mw2 x reader #call of duty x reader #cod x reader #sobiesław kościuszko x reader #sobiesław kościuszko #grom writing

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thebarontheabyss · 2 months

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omg this update was long-awaited! I was most excited for this ever since you said there would 6 variations/endings for the memoriam like hello?? The possibilities mwah <3 so far i played and found three finalish endings?? Obviously had to go with the you know what ending, with you know who both. Like that ending's sun parallel was the one I was most glad to read yk. I have to ask, what would you call your endings for the memoriam (i.e like good ending, true ending and so on...) like i dont want to condense such nuanced possibilities but i want to see if the other three endings are what i think they would before i replay it again^^

Or before im proven wrong at least lmao :)

-- :) anon

So happy to hear you enjoyed your time in Memoriam!

And sure, I’ll help with naming the endings, most are easy-ish to achieve and depend on your choices.

Spoilers below 🌚🌞

1. The Knife Ending: End the suffering of The Librarian. Depending on your POV, this could be a compromise ending with gray morality.

2. The Burning Sun Ending: Release the Librarian, watch Memoriam burn to ash—a “freedom above all” ending.

3. The Status Quo Ending: Leave without getting involved in the affairs of the gods- If you don’t want to shove your nose into others’ business.

4. The Bar Ending: Learn as much as possible from the gods, and suggest they visit your bar. Obviously, it is the happiest ending, but there is still work to be done with those two further down the line 👀

5+6. Bad Endings: Different failure endings in different stages of your quest!

#choice of games #interactive fiction #cog #choicescript #hosted games #wip #hosted game #fiction #interactive novel #thebarontheabyss #tbota #answered #the bar on the abyss

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my-castles-crumbling · 6 days

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hi cas :)

im not sure this is me asking for advice because i don’t think there’s really a recipe for getting over someone but i just need to rant into the void

so there’s this girl. let’s call her lucy. we went to the same high school but never really met. she was a year older and one of those “popular” girls i guess, so we never really crossed paths, but we knew about each other. she was one of those girls who made the room brighter just by being in it. like calling her gorgeous is an understatement. and she was always super kind to everyone. like all the boys in school had a crush on her at some point.

so fast forward a bit, first year of uni. i moved into a big city and enrolled into the same university as lucy’s best friend. let’s call her cathy (lucy lives in a different city about 4 hours from us). cathy and i quickly become really close and of course she starts mentioning lucy a lot. she also talks about me to lucy. cathy starts telling me how we should definitely hang out, how we have so much in common and how lucy would love to get to know me (we both loved taylor swift read the same books etc) but as we lived in different cities it was kinda hard to arrange. quickly we developed this kind of weird parasocial relationship through cathy. like lucy would tell cathy to ask my opinion on something, she would send cathy voicemails to forward to me when she wanted to discuss something, she also invited me to a harry styles concert but i was busy so i couldn’t go and so on. i should maybe point out that she didn’t really use social media so that’s why she didn’t dm me or something.

at one point i discover that lucy is a lesbian. cathy never really mentions it but it becomes quite obvious from some stories. and at this point, i kinda start crushing really hard. my little lesbian heart is only so strong and here’s this drop dead gorgeous girl who is so amazing and we have so much in common and god what is a girl to do.

i learn that lucy has a girlfriend and get kinda sad but can’t really complain so i try to get over my little crush and move on. however, one day lucy deletes all pictures with her gf from instagram she briefly had. a few weeks later she messages me and tells me she wants to visit me and cathy, and that there’s this big 1989 tv release party in the city i live in and she would love for us to go together. i’m of course smiling into my pillow.

so she comes in october for the party. this is our first time officially hanging out. and god, we have the best night ever. nothing explicitly romantic happens, but we just have so much fun. we go out for drinks and talk and then we go to this party and dance and drink and have the time of our life. and at this point i’m really thinking about this as a date, because we’re both queer and she hugs me and holds my hand and we actually cuddle in front of the club. and then. it’s really late and we’re both kinda drunk and want to go home so she calls her ex (?) to pick us up. i agree as i’m pretty tired but i’m also so confused as i have no idea what’s going on here. anyways, the night ends and we have brunch tomorrow and talk about how we had a great night, but don’t mention anything else.

long story short, she gets back together with her girlfriend and kinda stops contacting me as frequently, but half a year later, i’m still hung up on a girl i literally spent 24 hours with. and sure, i’m interested in other girls, have other crushes i guess, but somehow my mind always comes back to her. the reason i’m writing this today is because i haven’t listend to taylor in a while, but ttpd came out and suddenly i hear her in every song and she still told cathy to ask me my favourite song as soon as it came out. and she still talks about wanting to visit me and god i want to just move on so bad. but i know i’m gonna text her as soon as another party comes up when we’re both free. and it’s just gonna be the same thing over again.

Hi! <3

damn, this is...this sounds so difficult.

Honestly? I think Lucy needs to make up her mind. It sounds like she's trying to have her cake and eat it too by being with her girlfriend and flirting with you, and either she doesn't know what she's doing (which isn't great, but it happens) or she's not thinking about anyone else's feelings (which is worse).

I know it is so easy to get hung up on someone like this- there's like...such a fun aspect of a romance like this where it's drawn-out and a bit forbidden and kind of dramatic. But the problem with something like this is it hardly ever ends well and you deserve someone who wants you wholly.

Of course, this is all easy for me to say, as I'm not the one to experience it. But I think if I were you, I would take this album release as an opportunity to think about what you deserve and how you can use the songs to process your feelings. Because the important thing is, you deserve more, and you're not getting it, whether it's on purpose or not.

<3 <3 <3 <3 Sending you all the love!

Also, naming you deserving anon in case you want to update/write back!

#ask #asks #ask cas #deserving anon

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deviantdaffodil · 1 year

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caught

modern au!ronoroa zoro x reader

yall gonna learn real quick tht i got a type and tht it is very worrying

anyway ! zoro ! my most favorite pie rat !

i made a joke about a modern au of the straw hats being a group youtube channel and they all live together and do gaming/vlogs/challenges etc. and i haven’t stopped thinking about it, so keep that in mind while reading this! the fact that the straw hats are yt influencers honestly might not matter tht much to the plot but . now youre thinking about it too so im winning

contains: oral (male receiving), yall will like oral as much as me i will condition you to it, caught masturbating, voyeurism if you squint, mentions of recording, praise, being called baby girl, slight degradation

Zoro huffed as his cock threatened to spill his load at any second. He tried biting his lip to distract him but it didn’t work, and now the taste of blood tainted his tongue. He panted as he went to work on his cock, stroking his precum onto it. He was standing at the edge of his bed, fucking his hand as if it were a pocket pussy.

You stood at his door, peeking into his room from the slight opening you made. God how you wanted to be in there. It would be such a waste if he were to blow his load now. You watch him as he leans his head down, spits on his cock, and keeps thrusting into his hand. It was so unfair that you had to stand and watch, just rubbing your thighs together desperately wanting to be what Zoro was pounding his thick cock into.

He was so handsome and you could look at him all day. The way his cock is curved and formed just right. The way his cock glistened with spit and precum while he fucked his hand. God you can want those hands to pick you up and brutally bring your pussy down on Zoro’s massive-

“ACHOOOO!!”

Oh Christ. You panicked, not knowing what to do after a sneeze had pulled you out of a trance.

Zoro cocked an eyebrow to the door, but he didn’t stop. You peek in, still trying to remain unseen. “You like what you see?” Zoro teased as he looked over to you. You instantly felt embarrassed and hot. “Cmere. Maybe you can help me out.” Zoro knew you were there the whole time; he was just giving you a show.

You shyly slip into his room, shutting the door behind you. You averted your gaze from him as best as you could, though you did sneak glances at his cock as he fucked his hand. “I-I can go-“

“No,” Zoro growled. He turned to you, no longer jacking himself off. His cock throbbed and leaked precum. You were practically drooling and there was an unbearable heat from your core. “Come here baby girl,” he purred. “Get down on your knees for me, would ya?”

You bit your lip and whimpered. You definitely couldn’t walk away now. You refused to let a single drop of his cum go to waste. You walked up to him and gave him a quick kiss, then kissed his neck down to his chest, then to his abdomen. You kissed down his v-line then the tip of his cock. He smirked and pet your head, then grabbed a fistful of your hair. You looked up at him as you gently grabbed the base of his cock. You began to pepper his shaft with kisses, then dragged your tongue from the base to the tip. Zoro whimpered and bit his lip. “Such a good girl,” he praised you as he tugged your hair, forcing you to look up at him. You looked up at him through hooded, lustful eyes and bit your lip. Zoro parted your lips with his cock and your eyes rolled back as he bottomed out in your throat. “Oh, such a good girl,” he repeated breathily. “You take my cock so good,” he moaned.

You started to bob your head up and down his cock, guided by Zoro. He groaned and huffed as he fucked your throat, getting closer and closer to orgasm. You fought back gags as tears stung your eyes in the best way possible. You used a free hand to stroke his cock while you suck him off. He threw his head back and moaned as the grip on your hair tightened. You hollowed out your cheeks while bobbing up and down and stroking him. Zoro released your hair only to grip the sides of your head. You gasped softly at the sudden move, then Zoro went to town pounding into your throat, abusing the back of it. A few tears rolled down your cheeks. His cock was so messy and spit was everywhere. You opened your throat and made gagging noises around his cock. He began to growl while he fucked your face.

“You gonna swallow my cum?” he groaned breathlessly between thrusts. “Gonna be a good cum dumpster and swallow all my cum?” You moaned around his cock, eyes rolling back while he bruised your throat. In your mind you were begging him to fill your throat, you wanted his cum so bad, you weren’t going to waste a single drop. “Are you ready?” Zoro moaned. “I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna fill that pretty little mouth of yours, I’m gonna ruin your throat,” he continued to mutter dirty things to you while nearing his orgasm. After a few more thrusts he muttered, “C-Cum- Cumming,” and filled your mouth with cum. You swallowed his load, then continued to suck his cock a little more to make sure you got every drop of cum from him. He grabbed your jaw and made you look up at him. Breathlessly he said, “You did so good. I have a fun idea for this next part..” He smirked as he grabbed his phone. “Take off your clothes. Let’s make a video,” he purred.

“Oh God yes,” you whimpered as you started to strip. You could tell it was about to be a long, long day.

#ronoroa zoro #zoro roronoa x reader #ronoroa zoro x reader #zoro x reader #x reader #zoro x you #smut #fanfic #onepiece #modern au #xreader #female reader

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masthya · 11 months

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I only know taylor swift as someone who sucks ass at writing lyrics, what are the banger lyrics im missing??

lmao i totally get that. I think it will always be a bit of a personal preference thing, just like some ppl love some writing styles which others cant stand, same with lyrics.

I personally love the lyric writing that tells a good story i can see in my head, and the song creates an atmosphere which you can touch and even smell. I think Taylor's strength is in her storytelling, which shines through especially in folklore and evermore. I personally love "seven" ("Please picture me/In the weeds/Before I learned civility/I used to scream ferociously"), august ("To live for the hope of it all/Cancel plans just in case you'd call"), peace ("Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?"), "illicit affairs" ("Leave the perfume on the shelf/That you picked out just for him/So you leave no trace behind/Like you don't even exist"), "champagne problems" ("Sometimes you just don't know the answer/'Til someone's on their knees and asks you"), "cowboy like me" ("Perched in the dark/Telling all the rich folks anything they wanna hear/Like it could be love/I could be the way forward/Only if they pay for it"), "'tis the damn season" ("We could call it even/You could call me babe for the weekend/'Tis the damn season, write this down/I'm stayin' at my parents' house/And the road not taken looks real good now"), "ivy" ("Oh, goddamn/My pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand/Taking mine, but it's been promised to another/Oh, I can't/Stop you putting roots in my dreamland/My house of stone, your ivy grows/And now I'm covered in you").

Now every album she releases has its misses and its hits. I don't love "Lover" that much bc it's a bit too happy poppy for me, though the song "Lover" itself tells a very palpable feeling. Other songs I like are "All Too Well" ("And you call me up again just to break me like a promise/So casually cruel in the name of being honest"), "Dear John" ("Long were the nights when/My days once revolved around you/Counting my footsteps/Praying the floor won't fall through again"), "Back to December" ("It turns out freedom ain't nothin' but missin' you/Wishin' I'd realized what I had when you were mine"), "The Story of Us" ("I'd tell you I miss you, but I don't know how/I never heard silence quite this loud"), "Clean" ("Ten months sober, I must admit/Just because you're clean don't mean you don't miss it"), "Begin Again" ("And you throw your head back laughing like a little kid/I think it's strange that you think I'm funny 'cause he never did"), "Don't Blame Me" ("Don't blame me, love made me crazy/If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right/Lord, save me, my drug is my baby/I'll be usin' for the rest of my life"), "Delicate" ("We can't make any promises/Now can we, babe?/But you can make me a drink").

Now many people have been dissing the latest album's cringey lyrics for a while, and while I hate them too (god the vigilante one is such a skip its unreal), i actually like some songs with cringey lyrics. "Anti-hero" really grew on me bc it's Taylor self-analising and talking about how she is her own worst critic, which is something we all experience, and I think she made it in a fun self-deprecating way in the song that still delivers the message. other songs in the album which i love and dont have those kinds of cringe lines are "you're on your own, kid" ("'Cause there were pages turned with the bridges burned/Everything you lose is a step you take"), "Lavander Haze" ("The only kind of girl they see (only kind of girl they see)/Is a one-night or a wife"), "High Infidelity" ("Do you really want to know where I was April 29th?/Do I really have to chart the constellations in his eyes?"), "Would've, Could've, Should've" ("If I was some paint, did it splatter/On a promising grown man?/And if I was a child, did it matter/If you got to wash your hands?") (tbh I love all the lyrics in this song it's my fave atm).

Sorry for the long post! I really feel like Taylor's best lyrics are hidden away in her albums many times, but I do get how she gets called a good lyricist, because she is good at telling stories in them. I believe many people look at her stuff from a biased perspective most of the time bc of the way the media has portrayed her in part, and also bc she got a lot of hate from misogynists when she was young and it stayed around as mindless hate/disregard. She isnt the greatest ever but she's earned her reputation as a lyricist imo.

#my asks

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pinkseas · 4 months

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ALY. ALY PLEASE GO OFF ABT COLLEI

omg hiiiiiii anon twirls hair... crazy of u to ask me that haha

the fact that she's so fucking sanitized in game pisses me off like IN THEORY i get it. in theory. in THEORY a character who goes through the kind of awful, horrific things that she did being able to heal and find a much more positive outlook on life so young and in such a short period of time is a really good thing. in theory it sends a good message. but in a game where feminine rage is fucking nonexistent and you have these guys with really dark awful shit going on who are IN GAME shown to be actively struggling with it trying to be better or trying to live as adults after years or centuries or even NOT trying to be better, who are perfectly fine with being assholes!! just. contextually and next too all the others its INFURIATING to see her so positive and her past rarely really mentioned and it seeming to have little to no impact on her.

and like !! there are different ways to interpret that. one of my personal favorites is that she's overcompensating? idk if thats QUITE the right word, but having such a negative awful outlook on the world for so long, wanting to be better wanting to completely rid herself of her past wanting to be someone completely new completely detached... absolutely get that and honestly very possible considering her general character. but again, just. idk!!! idk. i HATE that shes almost like. not allowed to be damaged or violent or hurt or angry or anything of the sort in the actual game.

and shan and i were on call and shan is a fucking GENIUS and he was talking about how he initially thought collei would be before she was released ingame, based on just what little was known and like. im just THINKING about it and thinking about what she could've been.

just... a little quieter, a little more standoffish. still very kind in terms of her actual actions, but also in the way where just looking at or listening to her you wouldnt really think of her as such, having to pay attention to realize it. still feeling that anger and frustration and helplessness but channeling it into doing better, working to bend and shape it into a weapon, struggling with it. struggling with how angry she is and how much shes hurting and how much she wants to hurt.

and the POTENTIAL of the archon residue not being fully sealed away, or not being capable of being fully sealed. of it existing without being dormant. of her slowly but surely growing stronger and learning to harness and control it, for her own safety and the safety of those around her. it being similar to diluc's delusion in that she can control it and use it to cause harm to others even as it hurts her, generally pretty resilient against its effects, and similar to xiao's karma in the way that it lives within her, painful but in the end still a part of her she has to learn how to live with.

and just !!!!! not related to any of the above but i was also thinking about her and amber ohhhh my god. amber with a fire that burns so bright, warm and passionate and filled with life, something that guides and protects and loves. collei with the black fire that burns like acid, eating away at her and any and all it touches. amber with a destructive element that she uses to bring life, collei with a living element that she uses to cause harm. the potential of her dendro to be utilized in the shape of thorns or ensnaring roots or any type of nature that poisons, dendro as something that eats away at and decays. amber's constellation as a hare, the archon residue in collei taking form as a snake, predator and prey, collei's constellation as a serval that eats snakes and hares both vs the way that amber cares for and protects her.

idk!!!!!! idk. collei and amber, collei and diluc&kaeya, collei and xiao, collei and scaramouche, collei and the archon residue collei and life collei and death collei and angry and fury and helplessness and desperation a lack of direction trying so hard to build a life for herself struggling so fucking much to do so to figure out who she is and who she wants to be and how to bridge the gap and oughghghghghghghghhggh idk !!!!!!!!!! idkidkidkidk what if i Exploded. what if. im seriously just so fucking mad about her ingame like they couldve done SO MUCH but whatever. whatever. let all the guys be powerful and bloodthirsty and violent and angry and vengeful and lost and anguished and conflicted and deep and complex and whatnot and make the teenage girl kind and anxious and sweet and determined to be better but in a way that they never really explore or go in-depth about whatever. WHATEVER !!!!!!!!!!!! never get into how long she had such an awful worldview or how she feels about the fatui or her struggle with eleazar or the archon residue or what it feels like to be alive and have a whole future ahead of her after spending her entire life expecting or even wanting to die young whatever. WHATEVER !!!!!!!!!!! see if i care.

#aly.genshin #feeling so normal about her tonight #this isnt actually very long im too tired which is so sad

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hydr9 · 1 year

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you guys dont understand how much im begging begging begging. begging on my hands and KNEES for a jyp to debut a genuinely self-produced girl group.

(rant below the readmore)

let me say this clearly from the start: there is nothing wrong with traditional idol groups. there is nothing wrong with being a (k)pop idol that does not write/produce their own music, and there is nothing wrong with having no desire to.

g-idle is right there yes yes of course they are--point is, there is not only them as female artists who have self-made music and performances they want to put into the world via the idol industry. and g-idle is CONSTANTLY being dragged down into hell by cube.

it doesn't need to be jyp, that's barely even my point here. g-idle are full of talented talented women who have achieved amazing success despite everything that coudlve held them back, but god, their biggest enemy is still clearly their company. constant stories of soyeon fighting for the songs and concepts she wants to be released, mild choreographies, generally terrible working conditions that CANNOT be working in their favor as artists/performers/idols.

purple kiss was marketed as that: a self-produced female idol group. but jesus, rbw, where is the self-producing? where are their writing credits on their titles? their own original ideas? and how can an idol group be self-produced if they're stuck to such a cemented concept for each comeback? is that what they want to be releasing? god knows i love purple kiss and i adore their concept, but that's besides the point here. i always check CCL, check their videos, to see their writing and production credits, and they ARE capable of making good music, *obviously* they are! why would they market them as such anyways? please. these girls have so much potential. i'm not even claiming they're being mistreated here, of course not every idol wants to make their own music, that's not what it's always about, but when it comes to marketing a group as such, how can they come in last as writing credits and have their self-written and self-produced songs be constantly nudged into bsides? their original choreographies like my heart skip a beat?

and jyp. oooooh jyp. you make me so mad. in that japanese skz + park jinyoung interview, JYP explained why stray kids formed the way it did, and let me just use exact quotes here (u can watch vid for everything, credit to STRAY K SUBS on yt for trans).

"we felt like the distance between fans and artists was gradually getting closer. so, it's hard to fool fans now. it's because we saw that it'd be hard to put out something that we planned and packaged nicely. [...] then, in order to show their real selves without any adjustments, we had to make a team that's actually tightly knit and like one body. we came to the conclusion that in order to do that, the company can't organize the members. so we ended up trying that kind of method for the first time."

and how come you went and debuted ITZY and NMIXX with absolutely no hint of these beliefs anywhere?

where is this trust for your female idols? where is this belief in authenticity in your female idols? where is this belief that you can't fool fans anymore?

is it somewhere in the self-love pop itzy sings that they have not even written about themselves?

is it somewhere in the colossal failure of "mixx-pop" that you plastered onto a group of young talented girls and risked their entire career on?

what did you not learn from the massive success of stray kids? what makes JYP think that a group of female artists is not capable of the same thing?

i'm sorry if i sound like i'm ever degrading to other girl groups about this, i promise i don't mean to be. but this subtle and extremely pervasive belief that women are not capable of technical proficiency makes my fucking blood boil. women can write their own lyrics. women can produce their own music. women can arrange their own music if they fucking want to. women are capable of understanding a market, having a message they want to spread, and using the idol industry as their medium.

if stray kids can do it, why the fuck can't any female idol group?

where is the huge amount of funding that goes to stray kids for their constant events, activities, concepts, comebacks, performances, and everything else, going for any other self-producing girl group?

im begging this industry to let women have that kind of freedom.

PS: because i know this wont get any notes but im scared of people missing the point: please god know i love stray kids. i love purple kiss. i love g-idle. and though im not a midzy i have MASSIVE respect for ITZY. and i have so much hope for NMIXX and the talent that those girls have--i only hope for jyp to take their heads out of their asses and truly believe in creativity and innovation, something i dont believe they are doing for NMIXX. i am not trying to bring these groups, or any other groups, down in any way.

PPS: if anything i said here is wrong or you have anything to add, pls do, im very open for discussion on this, it is an important topic to me

#stray kids #kpop #jyp #nmixx #purple kiss #(g)i-dle #text #rant #i really hope no one gets mad at me #i dont think anyone will read this anyways #im just mad #btw i know LSF exists #i love yunjin #i have my eye out for that girly #i hope nothing but success for her

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thechillsquid · 9 months

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Good Omens Thoughts

Im going feral I’m going wild I’m totally normal about this show (lying)

Spoilers for season two below

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I WAS FUCKING RIGHT I WAS RIGHT I FUCKING TOLD MY SIBLING WHEN SEASON TWO RELEASED THAT I THOUGHT WE WOULD BE GETTING THE SECOND COMING AND I WAS MORHERFUCKING RIGHT!!!!!

Also so much confirms my thoughts that Crowley is infact the Archangel Raphael, we never get what he was called in heaven, he is important enough to be able to call angels to help him with tasks, fucking flipped that folder open no effort, I’m so silly I’m so silly I’m silly jeez louis

Also just the fact that the other Archangels were full on ready to alt delete Gabriel’s memories makes me think they are def hiding shit, and they want these things hidden still

So like what if Crowley learned something while in heaven he wasn’t supposed to, cause like my man’s just wants to get away from it all and do his own thing and like my thoughts are everywhere BUT I THINK CROWLEY KNOWS SO MUCH MORE SHIT THEN WE KNOW AND I THINK THAT ITS SOME CRITICAL PEICES AND ARGHHH

Also. God wasn’t in the second season narrating like She had been doing in season one??????? Like what happened with that???? Where is She?????? Also why haven’t we heard much about the Holy Spirit or Jesus besides the crucifixion? Like you’d imagine they’d be about more? I dunno

Further things, I think we’re going to see flashbacks to the war because it keeps on popping up and now with the Second Coming? Mmmmmmmmmm

I also think that we may see Pugratory but I’m not as confident and that’s just a what if since we’ve seen Heaven and Hell but what about other planes like

Also I think we’re going to see more of Hell in-depth cause we’ve been like lingering in Heaven this season; oh yeah like where the fuck are all the demons and angels btw????

Like sure we see demons and we see the archangels + Muriel, but like… where are the legions? Where are all the angels that in season one were all busying about??????

That fucking coffee as well is fucking. Sus. Sus ass coffee. Sus ass Aziraphale. Fucking ‘I speak to God totally’ dude is a lying fuck that I bet hasn’t actually heard God in ages and is going for a power hit. Sus ass Crowley as well.

Everyone is sus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also. I think we are going to get two more angelic/demonic relationships next season because we’ve always had three (major/important) relationships per season.

1: Madam + Witch Hunter dude; Newt + Our lovely witch gal; Crowley + Aziraphale

2: Lesbian gals; Gabriel + Beelzebub; Crowley + Aziraphale

So we had in season 1 two human couplings and one celestial coupling; season 2 we had one human dealo and two celestial couplings; so I think we could get three celestial couplings but that is also unsupported by much of of anything besides this loose pattern

Im going feral and I shall wait until I am fed with more lore and blah. But dear goodness so much to try and take in and even more issuing with trying to get all my thoughts out into something coherent lmao

Also Beëlzebub and Gabriel becoming a thing made me so silly goofy happy

#good omens #good omens two #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 #im going feral #IT IS SO GOOD #WINNING AND LOSING

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eskir · 1 year

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betrayal aftermath - wanderer

after the first:

not that cynical, most likely hasn't processed the first betrayal

he begins to move on after finding niwa, and they grow their little friendship

while he doesn't have a heart anymore, he can still feel his emotions rise in his chest: joy, happiness, and some unknown feeling that's called sorrow. he doesn't know how to process these feeling however.

at night, if he could cry, he would. he remembers his time with his mother, and recalls how she was so close but distant at the same time.

most likely he requires comfort or assurance from niwa at times, late night talks as well.

they both dwell deeper into who he was, and niwa offers comfort: "you're human if you believe it so," and etc. all of these guide scaramouche on the way to releasing his pain

but then tragedy strikes and as it occurs in front of his face, scaramouche realizes that it really wasn't worth it, having to interact with humans. he realizes that the gods are also not to be believed in.

so metaphorically he tears out his heart, so that he will no longer feel that sorrow in his chest anymore

he might view it as a betrayal because they were friends close, and niwa left. scaramouche also probably doesn't know what the circumstances/doesn't understand them.

after the second:

more cynical, but then he meets the child.

previously, he was a child of the shogun, then a friend to another, but now, he's a parental figure of some sorts.

he wants to live a happy life with his child; he wants this child to have the life he never had. but they both know of the illness.

his before, he feels much more joy. he likens this new experience to the one he had with niwa, but, different somehow. he doesn't know how, but it still makes him feel warm inside.

but the feeling of being warm still has hints of cynicism in it; its just like how a happy feeling could arrive when enjoying time with certain people.

when the child dies, it is a betrayal of sorts. when scaramouche stumbles upon the dead body, it is like all those memories were betrayed because all that happiness is now gone.

he burns the house, to burn all the happy memories. if there are no happy memories, then there is no reason to mourn for a lost friend, their memory was burned away. tears most likely streamed down, but did they really

the third:

cynical, he has gone through many betrayals, and now, was he really deserving of all the happiness? or, no, he learns that this happiness cannot last. like in the 3.3(is it the 3.4?) event where the yokai learns that interacting with mortals is painful, but still worthwhile, scaramouche is somewhat stuck there perhaps.

what point is there to interact and feel happiness if all that is left is pain and sorrow in the end?

he becomes distant to the world, and eventually, distance leads to who he is now. perhaps, with the child, he could ignore the feeling of loss and emptiness inside, but that death was enough.

he walks away, hat tilted over him so he does not have to see anything, but the problem is no one can see him. he blocks out everything, because he has no idea on how to cope with these losses, so he ignores them.

vision:

he goes through the motions of processing these betrayals after(guys i didn't do his story quest yet i know im so sorry king), albeit in private. he opens up to nahida first, as she guides him on how to cope and he learns to let go.

he loves. he learns to love who he was before, and slowly reworks the memories. they are tainted, but he is learning to change, to work past what he hated and loved. he goes out and finds closure, and nahida tells him that its fine if he does not want to confront certain things.

most likely cries to that fact, he's happy that he has a supporter, no matter how much he acts. its not acting really though let's be honest. he's happy, and in that moment, being happy with who he is, that's all that matters.

yeah and that's my headcanons, happy birthday wanderer! luv you and wish you the best for the next year, the entirety of scaranation(wanderernation?) wishes you the best. much love, hugs, and kisses from all of us. <3

#scaramouche #wanderer #kunikuzushi #headcanon #scaramouche hcs #wanderer headcanons #scaranation #betrayals

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udon-udon · 1 year

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2022 recap

Let’s see... 2022 was a pretty wild ride, not gonna lie

Shall we start from the beginning? Hmmmm the beginning of 2022..... SheEEEESH. It was my last semester of my final year for my bachelor’s degree in graphic design for marketing (wait, I have a bachelors? LMAOOOO I forget that I have one now holy cow wait a sec). I also remember being very very stressed out about my 3 week practicum I had to do in Feb. Alongside that were a ton of projects like portfolio making, final projects for said portfolio, the grad show etc etc. It was VERY busy and stressful. Luckily, the practicum went on without a hitch, and school projects were done with, and one of the bigger projects was well received so YAY!! And then of course, graduation rolled around in April, and I finally made it!! And then I got hired right after graduation which im still super thankful for cause I got hella lucky, really.

So work started in around late May/early June and it took a while to get used to things. I’ve never worked full time at an office before so there were many things I had to learn and stuff, but other than that I’m just glad I’m able to deliver the things I’m tasked to do, and they seem like they like me, so :’) Of course I still have my moments where I feel like I’m not cut out for the job or I think I’m doing horribly and for some reason think they’re going to fire me any time soon LOOL... but anywho... I started a deskmat project (which is still delayed unfortunately, i don’t want to talk about it...) but hoping that can get picked back up sometime soon... I was also rushing on new prints as well for con season so that was pretty wild.

Summer then came and WHEW. I got covid. Luckily it just felt like a regular cold, so I might have gotten a weaker strain of it. It was quite scary though since I live with family and I was afraid of spreading it to them (of course I ended up doing so cause we share the same bathroom, but they survived) Aside from that, I tabled for the first time in 3 years! AND I DID GREAT! I really missed tabling and honestly it might have been because of the turnout at the events but damn I did better than I’ve ever did, which is crazy. It really makes me want to get better and table more, but it do be pretty exhausting. Anyway, the summer was great imo, but jesus the fall took a nosedive.

September was alright, and for the second time, I didn’t have to worry about going back to school anymore which was kind of surreal again. I was finishing up the art commissions that I paused to work on the anime convention prints. I finished those up so I can focus on the Yuri Game Jam 2022 in Oct-Nov but little did I know.............. I would not be able to make it v n v. I underestimated the time management needed while working a 9-5 job and my lack of discipline... Also cause I didn’t have a clear vision of this year’s game which made me literally go in circles until I had no time left by the time I actually kind of had something down.... I became so stressed over the story that it branched out to other bad thoughts and I just spiraled really hard. Things that I said I would not let bother me had bothered me again and god I hated it so much. Why can’t I just... not think about those things. Hoping to stop those thoughts in 2023 though. So yeah I got really stressed so sadly I had to shelve the project and not release anything for this year’s game jam. I was very disappointed in myself, and it was a very tough decision to break my visual novel streak but I had to do what I had to do. After dropping the project I felt much much much much much better. Hoping to revisit the project again sometime though, now that I decided to release it whenever it’s ready (but will i have the proactiveness to go back to it? that is another story LOL)

So November was over with and December rolled around. December itself was stressful yet okay at the same time? Stressful in terms of spiraling at work again, but I also managed to just chill out and do whatever. And of course, the week-long break from work helped a ton (as I’m writing this thinking back I did absolutely nothing that week but that’s what I wanted most) Hopefully I’ll go back to work rejuvenated again cause I was clearly burnt out from work lmao. I should make use of my vacation days more man. Anyway since it was recent, I vividly remembering spiraling again over subject that shall not be mentioned, and I had no one to ground myself with so I had to try to ground myself somehow which I do try to do more so than rely on others. Luckily I recovered from the spiraling relatively quickly, so maybe it’s an improvement and if I ever encounter that subject again it’ll be an even faster recovery and soon it will be over? That’s what I’m hoping for 2023. Definitely a goal. Please let my 2023 self not let it bother me anymore please please please please (though i think i said that in 2022 no? hahaha) i jsut want to be loved v n v and not feel like my friends are leaving me one by one :’))))))))))))))))))))))))

ANYWAY Thank you for reading until the end. Ultimately, I want to worry less about subjects that make me go insane and just be happier. I’m a Bocchi that needs to find a close knit of supportive friends that can make me take another step in life :’)))))) LOOOOL And of course, I would like to draw more. Planning on opening art commissions in the new year some time soon so stay tuned. Hoping to table some more too! Though I don’t have much to sell hahahaha;;; Well then, until next year!

#personal #adventures with udon

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starkettes · 1 year

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you have inspired me . and i am indeed a child with figurines that i will absolutely show off to you even if you just nod and give a thumbs up at the end <33 my love language is pulling up a blackboard and sitting whoever im talking to down for The Talk and this will happen. you cannot refuse it <33333

(for real tho it took me months to also learn how to discern the links from each other AJSJSJAJ so yes to make it as simple as i can i will only deal with the canon 3D games . im listing them by order of their game release, but definitely not in the correct order of their place in the timeline(s). ily so so so much and im sorry in advance for the long infodump of an ask)

Ocarina of Time + Majora's Mask

the original 3d little man <33 hes like . the only 3d (adult) without chainmail bc he lived in a forest full of immortal children for his entire childhood (we dont talk about his age in majoras mask bc its complicated but just trust me hes a literal manchild) so AJSJAJAJ i differentiate him by that and his pants being distinctly white. the entire franchise and lore did him SO dirty but thats not the point of this (frothing at the mouth to rant about it but at another time)

Wind Waker

littlest of little men <33 hes the easiest link to distinguish from the others mainly bc of the art style, to the point that the fandom also calls him toon link. you can also tell ww link by the little swirly belt buckle thingy he has. also ALSO his tunic having a combo of dark + light green. literally forced the gods to choose him as his era's hero (he never held the hero's spirit in the first place) all bc his sister got kidnapped. absolute force to be reckoned with but still has voice cracks and Will Not Swear in front of his grandma in my hcs. all links are gremlins but this one literally sails with pirates so he has the background AHSHSHAHH

Twilight Princess

I WANNA BE A COWBOY BABY

fr tho hes so <333 AUGH. can literally turn into the goodest of good boys (wolf link). hes the disney princess of links bc animals Cannot And Will Not Hate Him. differentiated by the chainmail and his pinchable cheeks in game <333333 (also one of the only links imo that is absolutely not compatible with their zelda bc midna is rIGHT THERE. once again not the ask for this but i have. thoughts and things about tp zelink and tp link in general)

Skyward Sword

HES SO SOFT AUGH IM CRYING I WANT A PLUSHIE FRFR AJSJSJAJA but fr . absolute himbo and dumbass but vv much in love with his zelda <33 he has such a similar design with tp and its hard to be sure its him bc both tp and sksw link wear chainmail, but the art style of the game makes it so that the one who has the brighter and more pastel green is sksw link. his hair is also kinda diff and more soft looking, and hes also right handed <33

Breath of the Wild

do i need to explain. im so sos sos ssoss s9 r9rbf mentally ill over this reincarnation specifically <33 i really hope that i ruined this character for you now with my ability to not shut up about him for more than one (1) week. distinguished by blue and gender and hair and literally just everything bc im crying nintendo really hit peak character design with him and if somebody were to ask me to give a ted talk on him i wouldnt even know where to start bc hes just so PERFECT and augh look ok his character is so complicated starting wi-

okay it’s currently 3:30 am i will read this when i wake up

okay good morning im putting on my glasses cracking my knuckles and reading this like a grandma reading the news

the first two and twilight princess is crazy who the hell needs a hat that long i wouldnt be able to resist i would yank that thing off his head and run away jack sparrow style

wind waker link is so damn small he using a needle or something for a sword like he's desperaux 😭 😭 also didnt know he had a sister always assumed he was only child bc..well idk he just seemed like it to me

i was aware of wolf link (bc of how much u like him :3) but i didnt actually know anything so again i went to the fandom wiki and read it he's so cute (and midna rides on his back they look so cute 😭 <33) i am putting him in a puppy carrier and taking him with me

yeah breath of the wild is the main link i know of like that is the representative of the links to me thats the guy i know ALSO HE'S 4'11 I AM JUST BARELY TALLER THAN THIS GUY well a win is a win when ur short

this was great to learn actually and just know that if i ever get around to writing my head (1968) essay i’m gonna do this to you too <3

#thx u for this rei <33 #u are always more than welcome to dump about the blorbos around here #loz #soul-of-rei #mailbox

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