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#like before i get into this to clarify is MY personal take on the relationship and what i would like to get out of it
reanimatedgh0ul · 2 years
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while i love danny and valerie being soft tender and wholesome w each other i have yet to elaborate on why i personally get equal if not more enjoyment out of them specifically in a pre reveal context being allowed to love each other in a way that's messy imperfect and flawed
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sjyuns · 7 months
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🗒️ 、 INTENTIONS
popular sunghoon x fem reader 1535 words genre fluff mikaela’s note because sunghoon is so tristan dugray coded, inspired by a gilmore girls scene
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“I’d kiss you but your boyfriend’s watching,” Sunghoon mumbles, and he’s so close you can feel his breath on your lips.
He holds your gaze confidently, with a tinge of arrogance as his tongue darts out to lick his lip. You think that Sunghoon is the most annoying person in the world, because how can he look so devilishly handsome and have such an intoxicating effect on you.
It all started when he showed up unannounced and uninvited to your birthday party — still in his school uniform, tie loosened and sleeves rolled up with his blazer hanging over his shoulder.
And you should have known better than to let him charm his way into your house. “What are you doing here, Hoon?”
He loves the way his nickname rolls off the tip of your tongue, it's so addictive and he wants to record it so that he can play it again and again, even if your tone is one of spite.
“Happy birthday princess,” Sunghoon completely ignores your words, taking steps closer towards you, “now, where’s my birthday kiss?”
He’s at it again, aimlessly flirting with you. You roll your eyes, a deep sigh exiting your mouth, “it’s my birthday, Hoon.” How did he even know where you lived? You were sure you told everyone you invited not to bring him along.
“So I’ll give you a birthday kiss,” he grins, eyes glinting with mischief as he watches your facial expressions fall, ears burning red as you quickly turn around.
You hate Park Sunghoon and the unimaginable hold he has on you. “I’m going to find my mother. Do not, I swear to god, cause any trouble.”
“Your mother? It’s a little early in the relationship,” he moves swiftly to your side, arms casually slinging over your shoulder as he pulls you closer into him forcefully. “But it’s okay, I’m ready.”
Where in the world does Sunghoon get his cocky attitude from, you think as you try your best to pry and lift his arm away from your shoulder. Despite your surface indifference towards his advances, there were millions of butterflies invading your stomach at his every single action.
Before you can even try to escape, a voice calls your name and you stop to talk to Yunjin. “Park Sunghoon? What are you doing here?”
Sunghoon steals a glance at you, and he thinks you look absolutely adorable as you pout at the image of multiple people seeing you with him; given how you always seemed to have complaints about his overly flirty nature and playboy ways.
But Sunghoon hasn’t fooled around since you transferred into Decelis two months ago, a personal record for him. At first all you were was a form of entertainment, someone who had cute reactions to his smooth pick up lines.
Then it all came crashing down, when he started to feel the need to bicker with you everyday and mess up your hair every time he sees you in the hallways. And somewhere in between the blurred lines, he fell in love.
“Here to celebrate my girl’s birthday,” he cocks his head towards you, who’s palms now cover your face in sheer embarrassment. God, now it’s going to spread like wildfire. His girl?
Yunjin’s eyes widen and jaw drops, “really? You guys are together? But I thought you were with Choi Soobin.” She asks, nudging you.
Sunghoon frowns at her words. Choi Soobin? Since when? Sunghoon literally follows you around school whenever he sees you, and he’s never seen you ever talk to that boy.
“Soobin and I are just friends,” you clarify, “also we are not a couple,” your finger gesturing to you and Sunghoon as you answer the girl.
“Tomorrow we’ll be a couple,” Sunghoon cuts back into the conversation, voice loud, and he catches your surprised expression as he smirks slyly.
Though he continues the conversation without a single stutter or break, Sunghoon’s feeling utterly disgusted. Is that the kind of boy you like? Nerdy losers who can’t do anything for the life of themselves? He doesn’t really like the thought of turning into those types of boys, but whatever you want, he thinks — he’s already practised abstinence for you, he might as well go all the way.
At the same time Sunghoon wonders if you’re really that oblivious to his obvious advancements towards you. He’s made it crystal clear: dumped his girlfriend, follows you around, talks about you literally all the time, and yet you’re still clueless.
And he whisks you away before you find the chance to clarify his words again. He’s determined this time round, to make it extremely straightforward for you.
“Hoon why in the world would you say stuff like that,” you groan, hands slapping his chest. And he grins like an idiot at your touch, if this was what it took for you to initiate skinship with him, he’d be more than willing to proclaim himself as your boyfriend any day.
He places a hand on the place you’d just hit, “it’s painful,” he pouts, and you almost feel a little guilty at your harsh actions, “can you kiss it better?”
Until that. You huff, “i’m leaving,” you announce as you turn away, ready to walk right back into the crowd. Sunghoon quickly clasps his fingers around your wrist, pulling you into his chest.
Your eyes become those of a deer caught in headlights as your body is pressed firmly against his, his arms finding their way to your waist; a gentle but firm hold as he bends down.
“Wasn’t done yet, princess,” he smirks, and you feel some sort of danger looming over because Sunghoon looks like a devil enticing you to commit sin. His black hair styles perfectly like always and his red tie, due to his excessive movements, is now dropping down even more to expose his honey skinned collarbones.
The most you can muster is a mumble, “what,” and your eyes are glassy as you stare up at him, he thinks he might go insane — so close to just moving in to place a kiss on your invitingly soft lips.
“I’d kiss you but your boyfriend’s watching,” and he literally spits the term out, unable to believe he’s labelling someone else other than him ‘your boyfriend’. He knows you guys aren’t together, but just for the comfort of his heart he has to hear it again.
It takes you a while before you process his words. “He’s not my boyfriend, Hoon,” and it’s that short statement coupled with the way you say his name that really breaks it for him.
Sunghoon moves in just as you finish your sentence, and he sinks into your pillowy lips. It’s paradise on earth and he thinks he will never be able to get enough of this feeling.
“Sunghoon,” you mumble when he breaks the kiss, slightly out of breath as you look up with hazy eyes.
He chuckles, “sorry, baby, my bad. I’ll return your kiss back,” and Sunghoon doesn’t hesitate to give you another kiss, fingers caressing your waist as he pulls you closer to him.
This time it’s you who breaks the kiss, way too out of breath to even form full sentences without a few breaks in between. “You just kissed me.”
“Right, I just did that baby,” he smiles, those tiny fangs of his showcased as he gazes adoringly at you. “Actually, I’m looking for a girlfriend.” He pauses, eyeing your flushed cheeks and pink lips, “you looking for a boyfriend by any chance, princess?”
Now that you’re literally glued onto Sunghoon, you take the chance to look at him. Sharp nose, pretty moles that you could probably trace along all day, and his eyes which contrasting to his calm demeanour, held anxiousness as he waited for you to answer.
You’ve thought about dating Sunghoon before. Multiple times. Way more than you should’ve. And you never wanted to ever confess to it, because he was everyone’s crush. And not only that, he was annoying — constantly teasing you and making you flustered by his actions. You’d curse every time your heartbeat started to accelerate at his flirty words. You had thought that there was no way he’d ever like you back.
“I’m looking for a boyfriend,” you admit, letting out a soft giggle at Sunghoon’s overjoyed expression. And you decide that maybe now’s the time to get back at him, tease him a little to get him to stay on his toes, “maybe I should go find Soobin.”
His shoulders drop almost immediately and his arms wrap around your waist securely, chin resting on the top of your head. “No fucking way,” he grumbles, “you’re my girlfriend now. And I’m your boyfriend.”
“Yeah, you are,” you say, voice muffled in the embrace of Sunghoon. And you hear him giggle slightly, the rumble of his chest exposing the boyish feelings your boyfriend was currently going through, “for now.”
Sunghoon lifts his chin from your head, fingers brushing over your cheeks before they land themselves on your jaw. He tilts your chin up, “too bad my intention is forever.” And he places a chaste kiss on your lips again and again.
You are in for a long ride.
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© SJYUNS
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prettyboykatsuki · 1 year
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I NEED YOU EXCITED, I DON'T WANNA FIGHT IT | Y. OKKOTSU
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✵ tags ; established relationship, friends to lovers, afab +fem!reader, forward!reader, back and forth power dynamics, dry-humping, hickies / marking, cunnilingus, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, riding. fingering, dirty talk, 18+
✵ wc ; 7.3k (good lord)
✵ a/n ; written with my beloved @princess-okkotsu in mind!! i hope i did your boy justice </3 and thank u for everything literally wouldn't have passed chem w/o you
so not used to have such little warnings on a fic. lol. title is from fire and desire by drake.
✵ synopsis ; yuta wants to do right by you which is why he's so determined to take your relationship slowly. well, he tries too, anyway.
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Yuta Okkotsu is a believer of doing things the right way. 
He repeats this to himself like a mantra as he hangs out alone in your bedroom. He closes his eyes, elbows resting on the little table, face buried in his palms. Maybe it’s closer to a form of manifestation - like if he says it with enough hooplah it will mean something more than a jumble of words and syllables. 
He must clarify that he is trying to do the right thing right now. He is trying so very hard to do the right thing because Yuta Okkotsu wants to remain righteous where possible. 
It’s part of his job as a sorcerer, now well into his 20’s and more conscious of the world around him. He’s strong enough to put his money where his mouth is and experienced enough to know that trying to maintain some ethical code is part of staying alive in this business. 
And it’s not that Yuta considers himself particularly upright. His friends and colleagues often tell him that he’s a bit unhinged and hard to get a read on. His morals might not always align with greater society, but he never does something that goes against his own beliefs. A lot of which can be summarized quite easily ; anything to defend his comrades.
It really is so important for Yuta to try and be civil in these aspects. Lest he fall into something truly dark. Even he knows what he’s capable of, at least a little. 
That’s why he’s left with no choice than burying all of his thoughts of you and using every ounce of energy he has to suppress it as deep as it can go 
You know, with all the love that’s influenced his life and all of the years he’s spent  learning to be less timid - none of it seems to matter when it comes down to you and him. The logistics of a relationship and the idea of one are two very different things. When it comes to your relationship, he’s been keen in adhering to his strict timeline of milestones. First date, first hand-holding, first deep kiss. It’s a matter of honoring you - because before being boyfriend and girlfriend, you were Yuta’s comrade and companion. Before your relationship status, you're his cherished and valued person. 
So because he’s chivalrous. Because he’s romantic. Because he cares about you. 
And also because the sheer  magnitude of his desires for you perpetually leaves him in a state of distress and disarray. It’s all of the above, all at the same time. And sometimes it leaves him a little overwhelmed. 
He barely manages in his daily life but this? This is torturous. 
Being in your bedroom unprompted is destroying every ounce of self-restraint he’s built through these last three months. He’s made it through your relentless bullying without giving into his Earthly desires.
It’s just too ideal in a way, being in here. Everything feels like you. There’s pictures of your friends and family around the room. Everything has your scent. Your clothes are littered on the floor and hung over the back of your desk-chair. It’s so you and Yuta loves you and he’s not going to survive being in here despite it all.
It’s embarrassing. Yuta is not the timid teenager he once was. But for all the ways he’s good at standing his ground, his demeanor is all but worthless when it comes down to you.
You’re a few years his senior and you’ve always been a slippery character. He’s enriched by your curiosity of the world. You’re a researcher and archivist of cursed information, coming out of the Kyoto branch. You have plenty of accolades and always manage to teach him something new and come out of difficult things on top. 
Mostly, Yuta recognizes all of the good in your heart. He really thinks very highly of you.
There was an obvious passion for your work that Yuta was endeared by in the initial stages of your relationship. Plus you were easy to talk to. You’ve been a good friend to Yuta for years now, ever since you called on him to do some research on him and Rika. And, as the years passed you became closer until one night it hit him that his feelings of admiration were a little closer to something like love. 
And with big, wet tears in his eyes (and a fair bit of liquor in his system) he blubbered about his feelings for you. He isn’t sure what reaction he was expecting at the time. You were happy which was great, but there was also something so lax about it all. Yuta remembers it so vividly. The way you waltzed up to him, tucked some hair behind his ears and kissed him gingerly with all the confidence in the world. Like it mattered but it didn’t. Like nothing could be more obvious than your feelings for each other. 
“I’m pretty crazy about you too, Okkotsu-san.” 
After asking if that meant you were dating like the bumbling, lovesick fool he is - you officially began going out as a couple. And at first, it was smooth sailing. It wasn’t too different from your usual hangouts.
Eventually though, you had pointed out that it doesn’t really feel like you were dating. Suggested that maybe sleeping together would help break the ice a little. That was what started this moral dilemma. 
Being honest, it wasn’t like Yuta hadn’t considered it. What thoughts he cooked up while alone in the sanctity of his bedroom is between him and the heavens only. It was just the way you suggested it. You saying it made it all feel so real. And Yuta wasn’t sure how to deal with that. He wants to cherish you so much that he felt like he couldn’t consider your offer too lightly. 
And he told you as much, hand in yours and red-faced to which you only blew some hair out of his eyes and laughed. A simple okay, a nod, and a kiss.
Of course, if everything had been smooth sailing this would be a different thing altogether. While Yuta had declined sleeping with you too soon, you had absolutely no plans to make his life easy. He’s not sure how much of it is on purpose. Knowing you, probably a lot. You’re a smart girl, after all.
So all of your bending over and tongue kissing before going home and selfies that just border on boudoir are probably very purposeful. But he’s endured it all. He should cherish you more. He’s been determined to not give in. 
The fact he’s all but ready to blow his load over just being in your room makes him feel pathetic. And maybe he is, a little. But only for you. 
Yuta likes to think of himself as a collected individual. Really.  He knows being this worked up over something as innocuous as his girlfriends room is ridiculous. He knows he’s being ridiculous.
But he really, really wants to uphold his beliefs here. So he’s stiff, sitting with his hands clasped and holding it together just barely. 
He practically jumps out of his skin when you return to your room with a tray of refreshments. 
“Woah, Yuta. You okay?”
He turns around to look at you. A mistake, apparently. His eyes land on the sight of your bare legs before he forces himself to meet your eyes. You’re so pretty to him. Always so beautiful without any effort. 
“Huh? Yeah. Sorry, just got lost in thought.”
You put the tray down on the table in front of him before sitting on the edge of your bed - facing him. The distance between you is minimal. You reach out to pet the top of his head with the palm of your hand, scratching his jaw tenderly. Yuta feels loved by the touch. 
“You sure? Looks like you saw a ghost.”
Your genuine worry makes his spine feel like it’ll melt. He puts his hands over yours, rubbing his cheek against your palm.
“Promise I’m okay. Just—it's nothing serious.” 
“Mm. Even if it’s nothing serious, I wanna know what stuff you’re worried about, ‘kay? So tell me if you want.”
He feels unsteady but so happy. 
“Thank you, my love.”
“Yeah, of course. You wanna keep sitting on the floor or…?”
The minute you ask him, he feels the hair stand up on his neck. 
“The bed…?”
You give him a look of confusion before you break out into a knowing grin.
“Oh, I forgot. I mean to remain chaste, my liege. Just wanna cuddle a bit.”
“Are you making fun of me?” He asks, not masking the pout in his voice. 
You tilt your head to one side, leaning  back on your palms. 
“A little,” You say mischievously, shrugging “I’m used to your lifestyle of celibacy.” 
He frowns at you. “It’s not like that, I just want to—“
“I just want to cherish you because I love you and want you for more than sex yadda yadda yadda. I know. And I respect your wishes even if I think it’s silly.” You say, taking the words right out of his mouth. His frown deepens.
“It’s not silly to me.” He says, almost petulantly. At this, you grab his face in your hands which catches him off-guard. You knock your forehead against his, bent over to do it. 
“I know that too, you dummy. The point is that I’m not trying to get in your pants right now.”
He can’t help but smile, pulling away to kiss at your wrist. You giggle. 
“Well, what do you want?”
“To be wrapped up in each other like otters.”
“So romantic.”
“Right? So get up here.” 
He gives in sooner rather than later. You scoot till your back is along the wall next to your bed and Yuta wastes no more time in joining you. Your bed is crazy comfortable. Just laying it in makes him want to fall asleep almost immediately. He gets cozy  before directing his gaze to you in front of him. He feels like he’s gonna throw up and the only thing that’ll come out is his heart. You give him a look of amusement. 
“Enjoying the view?” You tease. He laughs, leaning forward to tuck his face into your neck.
“Yeah. Smells like you,” 
“So cute.” 
“Don’t know how to feel about being called cute.” He says honestly. He peers up at you and you’re giggling and he can feel his heart rate sky-rocket. You twirl a piece of his hair around your index finger. 
“You’re cute and cool and handsome. Better?” 
“Yeah. Yes.” 
“Mm,” You respond. He looks at you as your expression drifts off somewhere. He can’t take his eyes away from your face “Sorry you had to stay over.” 
“It’s fine. It’d be a shame if you didn’t get anything to look over while we were there. If you make any breakthroughs, it’d be good for Gojo-sensei.” 
“You still call him that even though you graduated so many years ago?”
He flushes slightly. 
“Force of habit. My point stands.” 
“Mhm. Thanks for being so supportive. I didn’t think it was that late, y’know? I would’ve tried to hurry if I knew,” You say thoughtfully “But I like having you over.” 
He gives you a once over as he pulls away, eyes flitting to your lips. You give him a small grin. 
“Kiss me.” 
He looks at you apologetically. 
“That’s not fair. We can’t kiss? Making out doesn’t count as intimate relations, Yuta.” 
“Okay, but it can lead to them.” 
“If it’s that serious, I’ll sleep on the couch.” 
“Wait, no.” 
“Then kiss me.” 
He sighs. 
“Just kissing, okay?” 
“Okay, you monk.” 
He laughs at the comment before pressing his lips to yours tenderly. You have no such intent of leaving it that way - your hand on immediately on the nape of his neck. The softness of your tongue makes Yuta feel like there’s fizz in his head - like the water inside of him is seltzer. He thought you would at least try to give him some mercy. 
He probably shouldn’t expect that from his favorite girl. He pulls away, out of breath. A little line of saliva breaks off between you. Your grin is eye-catching, like glass in the sun. Yuta wouldn’t mind burning in the magnitude of your light. 
“Just kissing,” He emphasizes, trying to be firm. You hum, hand on his cheek. You rub your thumb on his lip tenderly, looking at him square in the eyes. He’s stronger than this, he swears. 
“We are just kissing though?” 
“Baby.” He frowns. A laugh bubbles up from your stomach and he’s so entranced by it he nearly forgets what he’s trying to convince you of. 
“Since when is making out too naughty? Teenagers do stuff like that, Yuta. We’re grown-ups.” 
“That’s the whole problem.” He says back in faux exasperation. You look like you’re going to kiss him again, but you lean into his ear instead. Your breath is warm and ticklish against his skin. 
“Yuta,” You murmur with such clear intent he feels himself break down under the weight “Can’t we have sex, hm?” 
Blood rushes down to his dick so fast he’s embarrassed. He stares at you as you pull away, a look  in your eyes that makes him want to collapse. Of course he does. He wants to have so much sex with you so often it’s starting to drive him up a wall. Is there anyone in the world other than him masochistic enough to turn down the offer? He’s doubtful to say the least. 
“I want to,” He admits. You beam and nod. Your hand slides down to squeeze his waist. He swallows thickly. 
“Yeah? Then why can’t we?” 
“I just..don’t want to rush things,” He replies with as much conviction as he possibly can. The sincerity must reach you because you soften a little “We’ve known each other for a long time. And it was already hard to get here. I just want to make sure it’s right.” 
“You’re so thoughtful,” You murmur to him, running over his hip bone with your thumb “And that makes you really sexy, you know?” 
“What if it gets all messed up?” 
“Our relationship is stronger than that, yeah. It can withstand a handjob.” 
He groans at your vulgarity before laughing. 
“I’m being serious!” 
“I know and that’s so sweet of you. But I really, really don’t think it’ll be that bad if we have sex. We might fuck like rabbits for a few days but that’s not really the end of the world.” 
He feels heat creep up his next as you nuzzle your nose against his, whispering softly. 
“And doesn’t that sound nice? Cooped up in this little room, fucking each others brains out. Just you and me.” 
He feels his dick steel against his will. He looks at you seriously, a fire in his expression. 
“You’re being unfair.”  
“Who, me? Never. I’m just telling you what I think.” 
He groans in complaint. Is this the right thing to do? He doesn’t think so. But it’s not like he doesn’t want to. He really, really wants to have sex and there’s never been such a perfect opportunity. You’re a little too good at turning him on and he’s a little too pent up to think about it more clearly. It feels like the only thing he can think about, a side-effect of this whole conundrum. There is a right way to go about this and he can’t say for certain yours isn’t the one. 
Plus the vivid picture you’ve painted of the two of you fucking in a room for hours is making his whole body burn up with lust. Fuck, the things he could do to you in all that time without it ever being enough. 
Yuta didn’t know he was aching for you so badly until he was this close to having you. 
“Baby,” He can feel how deep his voice is getting. It’s taking all of his strength to keep it in. 
“How do you want me? Tell me. You’ve been thinking about me right?”
“Always,” He confesses, staring at you without any restraint “Always thinking of you.”  
“Doing what?”
Oh. This is… 
Oh.
“I’ve never seen you naked.”
“Then you daydream about seeing me naked? How tame.” 
“It’s more than that, it’s—I want to make you feel good. You’re so good to me. And I wanna…”
You stare at him. You’re so cheeky. 
“You wanna?”
“Want you to feel good. But because of me. All because of me.”
A wave of heat passes through him. He looks at you and you look...different. You look turned on, fingers carding through his hair. Right now all Yuta can think about is how much he wants. A word with so much weight behind it he can hardly keep up. God doesn’t Yuta want you more than he’s ever wanted anything. 
The room feels like it’s hotter than it was a few seconds last. A thick tension spreads over everything like jam. Yuta is too dazed to do anything. He can only watch as you sit up. You guide him to lay on his back and climb on top of him with ease. Your thighs feel warm and soft as you straddled him, taking his hands to put them on your waist.
He slides them up underneath your shirt lightly, enough to feel the warmth of your skin on his calloused fingers. Your eyes lock as you lean forward the slightest bit, caging Yuta in with your hand next to his head. 
“So possessive,” You tease, seeing right through him like you usually do. He really is. He thought he was a little better at hiding it “Already all yours, Yuta.” 
That makes his dick twitch. You must feel it because you laugh at him about it and his hands grip even tighter. He’s gonna lose his mind, being swept up by you so easily. He’s gotten so used to forfeiting restraint. Always goes in head first because that’s how cowards have to learn to fight. But he’s forgotten how to hold back. How to suppress. 
Right now, he feels like an animal. He feels like a restless hound dog, straining against the spiked collar he’s tried to keep himself in place. What does that make you, he wonders? 
In an attempt at transparency, he looks at you and says “I want you so much.”
And your reply is about all the permission he needs. 
“Then take me,” 
Yuta heeds your words and takes. It’s easy to flip you both over from where you are. He mumbles an apology as you yelp in surprise - and he hopes you’ll forgive him for his impatience. He’s been picturing this for months now. He knows what he wants, and that’s you on your back with him on top of you - making you feel so fucking good you can’t stand it. He slots his legs between yours, hovering over you as your bodies press into each other. 
You wrap your arms around Yutas neck with ease and he leans in to kiss you passionately. Despite where you are, it’s clear you're helping set the pace. Yuta is eager to follow. It starts off slow enough but when you pull away once, you're opening your mouth enough to let him in deeper. You stick your tongue out and Yuta follows suit. Everything is so hot he feels like it’ll burn, and you taste like mint toothpaste. He likes swapping spit with you like this, the messy way the drool runs down his chin and yours like you can’t get enough for each other. 
He has no idea how long you stay like that. Just kissing is a dangerous game. The nip of your mouth and the press of your incisors in his lower lip leave him shuddering. His hard cock is pressed against your abdomen, and he can’t help himself but hump into the soft plush of your tummy. Even through the stiff material of his jeans he can feel you. 
He quivers and whimpers into your mouth but you swallow the noise with delight. Your fingers find themself at the nape of his hand reaching up, tugging at the root. You pull away to give him a chance to breathe. He sounds pathetic, he knows it, but fuck he can’t hold it in anymore. Your voice is cool and collected yet rich and heady. It feels like a salve to his raw nerves, calming to him. He closes his eyes and humps into you and everything feels like it’ll disappear. Yuta just wants to give into his base needs. He wants to be all yours as much as he wants you to be all his and everything is so tangled up in his mind. 
“That feel good, Yuta?” 
“Y-yeah. Yes. Oh, yes.” 
You giggle at him a little and Yuta looks up at you. Look at the swell of your lips and the flush and sheen on your skin. Too much, too much, too much. 
But not enough at the same time, he rubs his cock against you again, harder. 
“So pent up,” You comment smoothly and Yuta groans in agreement “Why don’t I help you a little?” 
Unsure of what you mean, he stares at you hazily. You push him off, making him stand to his knees and he watches you as your hands come to the ends of your shirt. You pull it off over your head and toss it somewhere. You have nothing on underneath. His mouth dries out almost completely. Bare skin of your shoulders and the curve of your neck and your chest so open. Your nipples are hard against the cool air, standing to attention.
Your b0dy is so much sexier than he could’ve conjured up in his head. The real thing doesn’t even compare, and the way you move as you take off the rest is so fucking mesmerizing. Yuta watches you take off your pants next -  you put your legs up to slide them off. 
There’s not a single part of you that Yuta doesn’t want to claim for himself. He traces the outline of your legs, the bend of your knee and the arch of your foot. He should worship you, after all - he was right for trying to restrain it before. If he had this in the beginning, he’s afraid of what kind of person he might become. He’s scared of it even now.
 Yuta is of course the type of man to get sick on his own devotion. He’s always been like that. That’s what the rings on his hands always mean. He wants to make himself sick on you. 
Nothing could be more intense than just watching you undress, he doesn't think. You toss your shorts somewhere, but leave your panties on. Yuta still has his clothes on. The only barrier between you now is a thin layer of cotton. There’s a damp spot on it. He can’t stop his hand from reaching out, pressing into it with his thumb as gently as he can. You gasp. His eyes go wide. 
“It’s okay,” You assure, a smile on your face “Just wasn’t expecting it.”
He hums, dumbstruck, and smooths his thumb over the seam. There’s something salacious about the boundary itself. The material that’s keeping him from just taking you. 
“C-can you leave them on..? For a bit?” He asks. You blink twice. Even if you’re confused, there’s not any judgment. Yuta really does love you. 
“Uh-huh. If you want me too,”  
You give him the floor this time, Yuta thinks. He takes his shirt off too. He doesn’t take his jeans off completely, though. Only unzips them, pushing them down past his boxers to give him some breathing room. And with that he’s back on top of you. He presses a gentle kiss to your lips but moves down towards your jaw. The little fluttery sigh that leaves you makes everything close in around him. Like it’s only you two in the entire world. He leaves them down your neck, down your collarbone and sternum. Warm open mouth kisses trying all over every inch of you. 
His hands shake as he reaches out for your chest. You chuckle and reach for him. Guide them to squeeze your tits firm, a cheeky look in your eye. He tries to take more confidence in it now. Gropes the fat between his fingers, palms over your nipples in appreciation. He’s entranced by it, pushing them together and teasing the hardened buds with the pads of his fingers.
“So pretty,” He mumbles, mostly to himself “You’re so pretty,” 
“You’re pretty too, Yuta.” 
He can feel a blush crawl up his skin. He ducks his head down to take your nipples into his mouth. You let out a soft moan of pleasure that encourages him to suck harder on one and use his fingers to tease you where his mouth can’t reach. Your sighs are shaky and you're gently losing your composure.
 He wants to shatter you completely. 
He grabs your thighs and encourages you to wrap your legs around his waist. And you do with his guidance, a well of desire about to burst within him. He adjusts until his cock is snug against your clothed cunt. A broken oh, leaves your lips and Yuta humps into you, shifting until he hits the sweet spot. Your voice sounds again, pitchy and melodic like a wind chime and that’s when Yuta knows he has it. 
He has you right where he wants you now. Bodies pressed into each other and so involved, so together. Yuta can feel you everywhere. He’s always been in sync with you but every notch is turned to ten. The shallow rise and fall of your stomach, the slightest tenseness in your spine that melt away when he gives you a little attention. He has you in his grasp but he wants to hold onto you tighter. He feels like he’s been struck by lightning, the way his nerves are revved up.
He focuses on where your lower bodies meet, tongue poked between his lips and furrow in his brow. Drives his clothed, hard cock against your cunt, catching the crown into your clit until you’re shaking underneath him. There’s something so primal about it that Yuta can’t take it. He can’t think clearly anymore, lost in the feeling of dull pleasure. If it feels so good like this, being inside you might be too much. You’re both naked mostly except for where you both need each other. So close in proximity that Yuta can hear each of your short pants. Erratic and almost thoughtlessly driven by one single thing, pleasing you. Feeling each other, all wrapped up together. There’s something romantic about the mutual desperation. 
Drawing out those moans as he sucks at your tits, making you feel how hard he is. How pent up and needy and fucking horny he is all for you. 
Just humping your soft, sweet little cunt through your panties makes Yuta want to risk everything he’s got. The push and pull of too much and  not enough at the same time.  It’s so fucking euphoric. Your fabric keeps wetter and wetter, and Yuta doesn’t know if it’s you or him - his pre-cum dribbling through his boxers. Mixing together so that there’s less friction than there should be, material all soaked through and tacky. 
He can feel your pussy pulse and tremble. Your spine goes stiff and Yuta pulls away to look at you. You’re beautiful. You’re on edge, in complete bliss and so fucking beautiful. 
“Oh, oh, Yuta - shit, like that. G-gonna, gonna,” 
He doesn’t know what overtakes him, but he babbles on pulling away. 
“Cum for me, please—fuck, baby, p-please, need it,” 
You cum the first time just like that. For Yuta, humping each other like two lovesick teenagers. All for him you get all broken. He can’t help but burn the image of you underneath in his head forever. He needs to see it all again. 
“Oh, that felt so fucking good,” The praise feels like it’s being injected into his bloodstream“You make me feel sho good,” 
The slight slur in your words and praise all together makes him too happy. He kisses you, sloppy and lovedrunk, tongues touching and teeth chattering. 
“You’re everything I’ve ever wanted,” Yuta says with as much conviction as any one man could have. You laugh so loud it makes him smile. “I don’t wish well for anyone you dated before me.”  And you laugh again even louder. 
“You sound polite even when you’re threatening people.”  You say with nothing but affection. Yuta wants more. He wants you. Even with this quiet lull, he’s thinking about how he can get you to cum again. 
He nudges his nose to your cheek, kissing the corner of your mouth before he talks. 
“I want you to do it again,” He states, slow and steady, trying to feel out your willingness “And then I want to fuck you,”
“Wanna fuck me after you make me a mess?” You say, much more bluntly than he has. You’re not wrong “Are you a sadist after all, Yuta?”
“You look good when you’re messy. ‘s not my fault.” He replies, a little bite to his words. This delights you to the point he's proud. He does his best not to look uncool and this one time he’s succeeded. 
“Make a mess of me, Yuta,” You encourage, probably because you know he needs it. And he does “I want it.” 
“Yeah,” Comes his reply, as he pulls himself off of you “Me too,” 
The pace slows down now. The room smells of sex and Yuta can still feel the blood rushing in his ears but nothing so frantic. He lays you back, your legs undoing from behind him and resting. Yuta kisses your sternum first, a wave of emotion running through him. He puts his hands on your sides, sliding them down to meet your hips and squeezing tight. 
He kisses his down your body like it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. He can feel you curl in above him - not completely. But you seem a little astonished, and he'd be lying if he said it didn’t make him feel like he accomplished something. He works his way lower slowly, rubbing small circles into your skin as often as he can. Caressing you and committing your body to memory. He wants you to feel him as much as he’s feeling you, to feel his touch. The tension in the air is strengthened by his silence. 
If he were saying anything it’d be something like this. Like can you feel it? how much i love you? or i want all of you. Things he can’t often muster up the strength to say. He’s good with his words but not good enough to communicate all of it so bluntly. Yuta is brave in areas other than love. Sometimes your adoration makes all the words clog in his throat. This is better for him, the physicality brings him peace of mind. 
He likes how you feel. Your skin is much softer when he compares it to his, feels so different and more plush and comfortable. Yuta likes taking you in his hands and kneading the skin gently enough to relax you. Lower and lower, a trail of wet marks until he’s close to your clothed cunt. He stares at the sticky material, kissing it feather light before redirecting his attention to your thighs. 
He starts again, at the bend of your knee - and works his way inward. He’s rougher now, taking time to mark up your inner thigh with precision. Yuta can’t help himself, placing kisses in the last places his teeth bit you. He does it again and again, up along one thigh and then moving to the other until you’re covered in them. 
You’re trembling with anticipation. A sense of contentment washes over Yuta as his breath fans over your cunt, so completely soaked the fabrics a different color. His tongue runs over the material, a shameless moan of pleasure leaving his mouth. You arch your back, hands reaching to take root in his hair. The sensation of tension on his scalp makes his cock twitch. It’s salty and a little bitter, the mix of his pre-cum and yours altogether. Yuta goes to do it again anyway. The mess of it gets him excited, unconsciously rubbing into the sheets underneath him. 
“O-oh, Yuta.” 
He shivers, hands planing over the tops of your thighs as he brings him down close to him. 
“Yeah, yeah baby. Just me and you,” 
A soft laugh leaves your mouth. Yuta can feel how worked up you are. You’re quiet and tense. Some part of him wants to leave you like that waiting, but the other part of him wants to give you everything you’ve ever asked for. He gives into the latter, because that’s what he wants more. Rolls the fabric off of your legs with a deep sigh, a pleased hum. He loves the way you smell, the scent of sex and arousal mixed with the fancy soaps you keep in your bathroom. Your pussy is as pretty as you are, a sheen of arousal all along your slit. Your clit peeks through, swelled from need. Yuta kisses it without thinking. 
He starts slow. Lays his tongue flat against the seam of your cunt before dragging it up. The taste of you covers his mouth, tangy and slightly sweet - Yuta can’t get enough of you. He moans in appreciation, repeating the gesture as he pulls your pussy close. His nose bumps into your sex. He peers up at you with his lashes. You’re so pretty it makes him want to please. He repeats this over and over - licking at your clit with enthusiasm. Your clit is hard and needy, throbbing against the soft, smooth muscle of his tongue as he gains a sort of rhythm. He gauges your reaction when he tries something new, adding pressure until you’re squirming underneath him. When you start growing noisier, Yuta knows he’s hit the right pace. 
And he stays like that, your pussy soaking his mouth and chin. He adjusts himself slightly, rubbing his fingers between your folds. You let out a soft oh above him, making him want to laugh. He keeps at it, his fingers sliding far enough to tease your entrance. Your hole is twitching without him having done much at all, his middle finger teasing and prodding. 
“Don’t t-tease so much,”  You pant. 
Yuta nearly blows his load listening to you talk like that. He didn’t think you could be so cute. He listens though, pushing his middle finger into you with ease. It doesn’t take too much effort. Your insides are so incredibly wet for him. Your walls are so soft and inviting, syrupy to the touch. Yuta loves feeling them. He gives you time to adjust to the new sensation, fucking in and out slow enough that the tension melts. He gets knuckle deep with his middle finger and when it doesn’t seem like you’re tense anymore - he goes and adds another. 
He does both in tandem - and there’s a period where it’s all a bunch of sensation for you. Eventually it stops being just a feeling, turns into pleasure. He curls his fingers up against you hard, rubbing the soft and spongy area and he can feel you practically lurch forward. Your spine arches, mouth dropped open in a soft ‘o’. Another feeling of pride spreads through his chest, his whole body. He wants you to let go again just like this. While he fingers your weepy cunt and with your clit in his mouth - he wants to see how far he can push. How wet you can get before he ever gets inside. 
Yuta isn’t one for competition or ego. He’s always been easy-going. But something about you being underneath him like this, moaning for him like this - makes him feel like he should put in a little more effort to prove himself. He wants to make you feel so good, wants to see your composure break down steadily. He wants you praise him for it, to fuck each other like animals in the thereafter of your second orgasm. He pushes towards that goal steadfastly, and soon enough your body catches up with him. 
Yuta can practically feel your stomach tighten. You let out a noise, a string of mismatched syllables like a warning. Yuta only hums in encouragement, keeping his pace exactly the same. Feeling it is incredible. His fingers can feel the way your walls tighten up so hard and the tremors of the aftermath. 
Your back curves in a C as you cum, hard for him and he can feel it. He can feel you cum. He can see you, see the pleasure crash into you like a tidal wave. A second. Yuta made you cum twice in a row and he’s already itching to do it a third. 
You practically pry him off as you ride the wave of your high. You sigh deeply, and Yuta licks his fingers. He waits for your adoration, pleased to receive as you pull him up for a kiss. 
“You’re so fucking good, Yuta,” You say and Yuta feels his resolve crumble. He needs to fuck you immediately “So, so good to me baby.” 
He whimpers into your mouth. “I need you.”
You laugh breathlessly, your hand reaching between your bodies to squeeze his cock. Yuta shudders and you giggle to yourself. 
“Yeah. Bet you’re feeling pent up, Yuta. How about I treat you this time? That okay?” 
“Treat me?” 
“By riding you,” You say, smiling at him. He gets chills from the offer “You want that?” 
“Oh. Oh, fuck - please. Please?” 
You smile at him. 
“Lay on your back, sweet boy.” 
Sweet boy. He swallows thickly but does as you say. Lays back and watches you climb over him a second time tonight - this time with a much more obvious intent. He can’t stop thinking about how gorgeous he finds you - no matter how many times he sees you, it’s not easy to get used to. 
You sit up on his lap, naked and beautiful, your hangs tugging down his boxers just enough to free his cock. He hisses at the sensation of air, then moans because your hand squeezed around the shaft. Yuta watches, bewitched, by how you spit into the palm of your hands and let it drip down onto his cock. You stroke until he’s covered in it, saliva making a mess of him. When he’s all wet, you scoot forward just slightly. A hand ends up on his chest as you pull your hips up. 
Guiding the tip to your hole, you sink down on Yuta finally. He can only recognize loosely that there’s no condoms to be seen but he doesn’t find it in himself to care. There’s a slight sensation of tension that quickly gives away to nothing but slick, white-hot pleasure. You feel amazing. It’s not like anything he’s ever felt in his entire life and each time you drop down another inch - he’s biting his cheek trying not to cum immediately. That’d be such a waste, even if you’ve promised to fuck like rabbits - Yuta wants to make this last long. 
You lower yourself steadily until all of him is inside. Your expression is slightly pinched, and your whole body trembles before you finally seem comfortable. You lean forward, your hand next to Yuta’s head as you look at him. 
“Cum when you feel like you need to, ‘kay?” 
Yuta just swallows. 
Before he gets a chance to adjust to the feeling, you pick your hips and slam them back down on his cock without breaking a sweat. Yuta nearly screams, his hands immediately shooting to your hips to try and slow you down. You give him a wry grin, He almost wants to plead for your mercy. 
“Want me to go slower?” 
“Please be nice.” 
You giggle but heed his request. Repeating the motion but slower as promised, you rock yourself steadily onto Yuta’s cock. The pace is controlled and smooth, a rhythmic pass of your hips over and over. Your insides feel like they’ll melt him completely, make him liquid from the inside out. You’re picturesque riding him, tits bouncing and leaned forward enough that Yuta can see the concentration on your face. He watches you find your own pleasure in it too - somewhere half-way between grinding and bouncing that makes you look so good. He feels so incredible like this. 
He moves his hands so they’re grabbing your ass and only moves with you slightly. Not enough to change the pace, but to meet you. The room is filled with the sound of skin hitting skin - a tacky smack as your bounces hard enough to hit Yutas thighs. Something about is so vulgar, but something about is so sensual. He can feel every nerve in his body standing on edge. Your hand moves gently between your bodies to tease your clit as you ride and Yuta can’t help but be impressed by your stamina. He feels so spoiled. Feels so mind-numbingly good he wants to go brain dead while you drain for everything he’s got. 
Your expression is blissed out as you hit your stride, absolutely debauched. He can feel you again, another rush of arousal. He’s getting better at telling when you’re close. Your pussy is so sloppy all for him, because of him. So messy that it’s dripping down his cock onto his balls, all over the sheets underneath you. He can feel you clench in anticipation - the sudden spasming in the build up. 
“Gonna cum again and I want you cum right after me, yeah baby? Can you do that?” 
Yuta groans. 
“Pleasepleaseplease.” Is all he can make out. You laugh, breathy. Your pace is still the same as you rub your clit. The third time you cum is less intense. It’s a shorter wave, a softer sort of orgasm that seems to ease you more than it does anything else. Even still, you clench around his cock hard - getting so much wetter than you were a minute ago. 
It’s in the tremors that Yuta finally feels in touch with himself again. He loses himself completely. Finally giving into the sensation that’s been drowning him, He feels it in his entire lower body. Every atom of him finally catching up to the high of the release. It’s so intense when he opens his mouth nothing comes out. His eyes shoot open then go back closed. The coil in his stomach loosens more slowly at first than all at once, like a car crash. When Yuta finally cums he sees nothing but white stars in his vision. He can’t scream, can’t speak - so he holds onto you tight and finishes to the sound of your gentle coaxing. Your voice is shot hoarse as you coo to him.
“That’s it baby, cum for me. That’s it, there you go.” Echoes around in his head. Cum spurts out of him, thick and hot in your walls and he doesn’t even try to pull out as he goes completely limp underneath you. 
When he opens his eyes back up again, you're both just as ragged as each other. Yuta can’t stop himself from laughing. He hugs you tight to his chest as you lay on top of him - naked bodies and tangled limbs. 
“I love you,” Yuta says blearily. You laugh. 
“I love you too, Yuta.” 
__ 
After you and Yuta manage the energy to shower, you find yourselves back in bed. It’s late when you’re finally ready to sleep, being in the same positions you were before. Only this time with new sheets. 
Yuta lets you into his arms, wrapping them around you as you nuzzle into his chest. 
“So. Was it worth breaking your rules?” 
Yuta can’t help but break out into laughter at your question. He nods his head, a flush on his expression. 
“Yeah. Yeah it was.” 
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4K notes · View notes
honeytae · 7 months
Text
you’ll let me?
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pairing : shy!oc x shy!jk, est. relationship
genre : smut
wc : 2.9k
warnings : minors dni! descriptions of making out, dry humping, cunnilingus and vaginal penetration all below the cut. jk has an oral fixation bc duh, also he’s wearing calvin’s bc i couldn’t help myself. author makes far too many 3D lyric puns but to be fair i had it on repeat </3
the last text jungkook sent was staring back at you on your phone screen, and you never knew how deeply such a simple question could impact you.
can i come over?
biting your bottom lip, you cursed as he started typing again, then quickly disappeared from the chat.
you never wanted to make him feel rejected, but sometimes you think it’s better off. teasing him was easy…effortless, even, over text. when you were with him in person, you turned into some timid little girl around her very first crush.
sighing, you begin typing a response, some bullshit excuse about it being a long day and needing some sleep. before you hit send, you set your phone down, rolling your neck and staring at the ceiling in thought.
admittedly, he’s all you can think about. how pretty his eyes are, how they sparkle when he smiles at you or laughs at one of your dumb jokes. how soft his lips feel when briefly pressed against your own since he’s such a fucking gentleman all the damn time and won’t take it further unless you make the first move.
you want him. and you’re tired of pretending you don’t.
fuck it.
a repetitive clicking sounded from your phone as you held your finger on the backspace button, deleting your previous unsent response.
yes please :)
you feel your pulse speed up as you press send on your revised message, unable to suppress your giddiness when you get an immediate response.
on my way :)
the minutes feel like hours while you wait for your boyfriend to arrive.
your head snaps up when you finally hear the rapping of knuckles on hard wood, nearly stumbling over the carpet as you get up to open the door for him.
“hey,” he breathes out, running his tattooed hand through his dark hair, jiggling his car keys in his other.
“hi there,” you smirk, stepping back to allow him room to enter your place.
jungkook grins, lip piercings glittering under the lights of your foyer, butterflies fluttering in the pit of your stomach at his mere presence.
you shut the door behind him, and you internally begin to panic. shit, shit, shit. this is why you can’t function around him. he’s sexy, he’s smooth, he’s confident. he’s got it all.
seemingly noticing your frozen state, jungkook takes your hands into his, pulling you toward him and wrapping his arms around your body.
“you wanna know something?” he whispers, kind eyes soothing you immediately. he smiles when he feels you melt into his arms, wrapping your own arms around his neck as you hum in response.
“you intimidate me,” he presses his forehead against yours, his nose crinkling at your alarmed facial expression.
“i meant that in a good way,” he clarifies, closing his eyes for a second to think about what he wants to say next.
you get caught up in the way his long eyelashes kiss his cheeks, his soft skin flushing a light pink under your attention.
it was comforting to know he was as affected by you as you were by him. you squeezed your arms around him to get his attention again, admiring his shy smile as he came back to you.
“you intimidate me too,” you whisper, “but i also think we should let ourselves do what we want.”
you watch as something unfamiliar flickers in jungkooks eyes, excited by the new desire displayed in his features.
you shiver as his hand slides up your neck to cup your jaw, resting his hand behind your ear. his eyes flick down to your lips, and you swear you must be dreaming.
“is this okay?” he asks, voice soft, caring. as usual.
“more than okay,” you murmured, tilting your head to finally, finally, finally press your lips to his.
when his mouth opens, he tastes sweet, like sugar and cherries. it just makes sense, the ease of your tongues finding each other making you both sigh in relief.
moans and whimpers pass between you when he closes his mouth and sucks on your tongue, and you feel dizzy due to the fact that he has now walked you backward to press your spine to the wall. your shy jungkook is no more.
you can gradually feel yourself slipping into his spell, each movement of his mouth pulling you in deeper and deeper until you have to pull away to catch your breath.
jungkook’s eyes dart wildly around your face, admiring your flushed lips and messy hair. he adjusts his hand so that his fingers are pushing your hair behind your ears, smiling when he feels your fingers wrap around his wrists.
“shit, we should do that again,” you exhale, jungkook giggling as he tips his scrunched up face to the ceiling for a moment.
“yeah,” he breathes, leveling his face with you again before tipping to the right, teasingly hovering over your needy mouth, “we really should.”
this time is rougher than the last, neither of you caring to test the waters any further. they’ve been tested enough.
and all you can think is how incredibly stupid you’ve been. how did you deprive yourself of this for so long?
you keen as jungkook presses his chest to yours, wildly beating hearts communicating just how ready the two of you were to finally feel each other.
your hands go to jungkooks hair while his go down your back, trailing down your spine and politely stopping at midway.
he groans deep in his throat when you guide his hands to go to your ass, a surge of heat flushing between your legs when he cups the flesh with his fingers and squeezes like he’s wanted to for months.
“been waiting for this,” jungkook speaks breathlessly between kisses, an official statement on your four months of celibacy.
“don’t have to wait anymore,” you break away momentarily, a string of saliva stretching between you. “i’m ready.”
you tilt your head back to look at him, raising your eyebrows so that he knows you’re serious. his tongue darts out to play with his lip piercings, a casual habit of his, but it flames the arousal settling into the pit of your stomach.
“are you sure? you’ll let me?” he asks, and you grin as you slide out from where you were pressed between him and the wall, taking his hand in yours and wiping the rejection right off his face.
“honestly? i would let you do anything you wanted to me,” you answer truthfully, a confession you’re glad to have said without facing the man.
and it was a good thing, because it was now jungkooks turn to blush, biting his lip as you led him to your bedroom.
once on your bed, jungkook held your waist as you straddled him, smiling between kisses as you playfully nipped at each others lips.
after months of build up, it felt great to be able to feel each other, body to body.
he hissed as you rolled your hips down on his half hard cock, clenching his teeth as he let his hands roll the flesh of your ass, encouraging you to do it again.
you reveled in the noises spilling from his mouth, and never in your wildest dreams could you have imagined a man’s moans could be so sexy.
you definitely weren’t being quiet yourself, whining and moaning at each rock of your hips along jungkook’s growing shaft.
this moment was fulfilling your fantasies. and, well, not to sound totally pathetic but…it’s been a long time since you’ve been touched like this.
“i wanna see you, baby,” jungkook speaks up between moans, cursing when you guide his hand up underneath your shirt.
he wastes no time in lifting the material to feel your skin, hand flattening to drag up your stomach.
“oh, my god,” you whimper, moments later when he’s got your bra discarded on the floor and his mouth on your chest. your hand holds onto his hair for some kind of stability as he marks the underside of your breast, smoothing it over with a swipe of his tongue that catches your nipple as well.
jungkook lets out a noise of approval at the way the action makes you pull on his hair a bit tighter, moving his face so he’s directly over your breast, wrapping his lips around your nipple and suckling.
his eyes flick up to your face and he feels a rush of blood go down to his dick at the view. your face is contorted in pleasure, mouth dropped open as you arch into his touch.
it makes him want to move down further, so he tests his limits and removes himself from your chest, shuffling down and watching for your reaction as he hooks his fingers underneath the waistband.
“tell me if you want me to stop,” he speaks softly, eyes turning to amused crescents when you instead lift your butt for him to remove your shorts.
always so caring. your jungkook. but you think you might kill him if he doesn’t have your pants off in the next two seconds.
“please don’t stop,” you beg, and that’s all jungkook needs to hear before he’s nearly ripping your shorts and underwear off, coaxing your thighs open to reveal just how wet you are.
“shit,” he says as he traces a finger through your folds, making your cheeks burn hotter as he retracts said finger and closes his mouth around it to get a taste of you.
“jungkoook,” you whine, embarrassed at his crudeness. he only laughs in response, settling himself between your legs as he taps his fingers against your thigh comfortingly.
“what? i want the full experience! and you taste amazing.”
he’s shameless, you think, but you don’t get the chance to say it before he has his face buried between your legs. you inhale a broken gasp as he licks at your clit, rolling it with his tongue as his thumbs rub circles into the skin by your hip bones.
he alternated between flattening his tongue to gather your juices and pointing it to rub hard circles on your swollen clit, and the pace in which he does so is making you dizzy.
“fuckin’ gorgeous,” he slurs against you, and if it was possible, you’d say jungkook was drunk off of you.
“fuck, fuck, please,” you whimper, the high pitched sound piercing the otherwise quiet of your apartment.
jungkook seems to understand what you’re asking for as he immediately puts his fingers to good use, sliding his index finger into you and curling it up to hit your g-spot each time he enters you.
it leads to a humiliating amount of gushing from your entrance, jungkook again taking his finger out to suck everything you’d given him off.
“jungkook,” you wail as he swings your legs over his shoulders, nuzzling his head further between your legs, opening his mouth to moan against you.
your mouth opened in a silent scream as he began fucking you with calculated flicks of his tongue, the tip of his nose bumping into your clit with each nod of his head.
“baby, hmm-fuck!” you shudder as he continues the tantalizing action, running your hands through his hair and clenching your fingers around his soft tendrils as you felt the burning intensify in the pit of your stomach.
jungkook groans at the sting on his scalp, eyebrows pulled together in concentration as he works you to your orgasm.
his hard work pays off when your thighs start shaking around his head, your release coating his mouth, hard breaths wracking your chest as he cleans you up with gentle laps of his tongue.
when he reappears above your face, you cup his jaw with both of your hands, lazily blinking up at him as you both attempt to steady your breathing.
“that was,” you raise your eyebrows, eyes darting down to his lips as his tongue darts out to drag against his bottom lip.
“fucking hot,” jungkook finishes for you, humming when you lift your head off the pillow and catch his lips once more.
he exhales a heavy breath from his nostrils when you slip a hand down his sweatpants, rubbing his hard bulge through his boxers.
“please fuck me,” you beg again, all reservation thrown out the window as you stroke him through the thin fabric separating you from his dick.
“don’t have to tell me twice,” he grins, shuffling out of his pants and grabbing a foil packet from the pocket before tossing them off the bed.
your mouth dropped slightly as he slid his calvins off his hips, hard cock slapping his stomach. you reach for him, but he gently overrides your hand, beginning to roll the condom onto his tip.
“as much as i would love for you to touch me right now, i know i would blow my load right away,” he chuckles when you do, but gets serious again with his next words, “and i need to be inside of you very soon otherwise i’ll completely lose my sanity.”
as he says this, he settles back over your frame, caging you underneath him and exhaling shakily as his cockhead catches in your entrance with the movement.
“okay,” you smile, kissing him once more as he slides his hands under your knees, forcing your legs up to slide in with ease.
“oh, fuck,” he moans as he bottoms out inside of you, sucking a harsh breath between his teeth. his neck flexes above you, a sheen of sweat beginning to show. you’re tempted to suck on the supple skin there, but all thoughts go out the window when he starts gently grinding circles into you.
“are you okay?” he asks, and even in his still caring tone, you can hear his voice threatening to break under the throes of pleasure.
“‘m good,” you murmur, wrapping your arms around him and playing with the hair on the back of his head, “you can move.”
he starts out slow, giving you deep thrusts that almost have his tip coming out before he pumps his entire length back inside of you.
“you’re so pretty,” he says suddenly, smirking when you grow flustered at his out of the blue confession, “i don’t tell you that enough.”
“y-you tell me that every day, jungkook,” you argue, brain muddled from the pleasure burning in your core.
“should be telling you at least three times a day,” he counters, an attractive grunt ending his sentence as he feels your muscles clench around his cock.
his eyes watch your every move, flicking down your bodies to where you’re connected, to your open mouth, to your scrunched eyebrows. he’s looking for clues of what you like, versus what you don’t.
experimentally, he snaps his hips a bit harder and faster, reaching a depth he hadn’t yet found within you.
“feels so good, baby,” you confirm around a gasp, jungkook readily diving down to swallow the moan you let out when he continues the delicious pace.
the bedsprings squeak under his movements, both of your moans accompanying the bothersome sound as the burning in the pit of your stomach grows.
the band feels like it’s been stretched past it’s limit and it’s about to snap. each time jungkook hits your g-spot feels like you’ve ascended to a different universe. you’re running your hands down his back to cope, digging your nails into his skin as he pushes you further up the mattress with his thrusts.
“squeezing me so tight, baby, ‘m not gonna last,” he pants into your ear, the sound so sexy that you hold him by the jaw again, tongues wrapping around each other as you both get closer and closer to your highs.
“gonna cum, i’m gonna cum kookie,” you whimper into his mouth, sobbing out a delighted moan when his thumb finds your clit again, rubbing circles into it with the pad of his finger.
“give it to me, baby, c’mon,” he moans, his hands folding your thighs up so they pressed flat to your stomach, hitting deeper with each thrust of his hips.
you cum with a high pitched whine of his name, jungkook responding with a series of “ah, ah, ah”s punctuating his final thrusts before he stills, exhaling a sigh of relief as he sets his forehead on your collarbone.
you cringe at the sting in your legs when he adjusts them to lay straight out on the bed again, jungkook apologizing with a soft kiss to your forehead that suddenly made the burning in your legs dissipate.
after discarding the condom in your bathroom, he walks back into the bedroom with a warm cloth in hand, gently dragging it between your legs to clean you.
you never dreamed that jungkook would be an aftercare king, but looking back on the months you spent with the sweet man, it made perfect sense.
your thoughts are interrupted by jungkook laying down next to you, swiping your hair back from your damp forehead.
“shit,” you finally say, at a complete loss for words in your post orgasm haze.
jungkook laughs, but it’s a kind laugh. he’s endeared, enamored, maybe just a little shy again now, because he just got to do everything he’s been dreaming of for months.
he shakes his head in disbelief before settling beside you, extending his arm for you to use as a pillow which you readily roll into.
“definitely couldn’t have done that through the phone.”
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chlorinecake · 4 months
Text
𓂃 watercolor eyes | park wonbin oneshot
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⚡︎ pairing: Stoner!Wonbin x Female!Reader | ⚡︎ word count: 7.8k | ⚡︎ genre: mutual pining, college au, smut (⚠︎) | ⚡︎ contains: awkward relationships, an original character + sungchan and shotaro, swearing, drug use/distribution, angst (?), mild dacryphilia, sexual tension mixed with fluff, kissing, unprotected sex while buzzed, heavy petting, oral (m. r)
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ON TOP OF countless other obligations in your life, upcoming exams were kicking your anxiety's ass with the biggest fucking boots imaginable.
All you wanted was to take the edge off, and at this point, you didn’t care what it’d take to do that.
Introducing Exhibit A: Your closest friend and roommate, Roxanne, who so conveniently happened to be a junkie.
You brought up your need for a “quick fix” (so to speak) while studying in your dorm together one afternoon. Though, she offered to get you some help from another friend of hers who you’d never met before.
“Wait, you want me to go with you?” You asked in confusion, already prepared to reject Roxanne’s proposal at the idea of personally consulting her drug dealer.
“Yes, you're coming with me… What do you think this is, Kiki’s Delivery Service?”
“No, but… I-"
“Don’t tell me you’re chickening out, ____,” she chuckled, turning the steering wheel as she trailed down a shadowy lane.
“No, I… I want this… I need this even, it’s just that…I don’t really know what to expect…”
“Then don’t expect anything,” she answered, giving you an encouraging smile that came off as more condescending, “Expectations are for pussies anyways.”
“Roxanne, I’ve never even met this guy before,” you pressed, hoping that she’d maybe let you sit outside in the car instead of actually speaking with him.
“Look, I’m close with my dealer, and as I always say, a friend of mine is a friend of yours.”
Cue your internal sigh of submission.
“Okay,” you said, straightening your posture in your seat with a feigned confidence.
“Uhhhh, are you sure with that ‘okay,’ or is it more like an ‘okay, I have more questions’ type of ‘okay’?”
“No,” you clarified, “it means what I said… I’m okay.”
“Okay,” she nodded, before giving you a brief synopsis about this friend of hers: STEM major, weed connoisseur, and art-hoe with a shy guy undercut.
Doesn’t sound anywhere near as daunting as the drug dealers on TV shows appear to be, right?
She pulled up to one of the apartment complexes a few miles from your university. It was one of the lower quality establishments, with the only oddity being how nice the vehicles parked outside the apartment divisions were, a sleek black motorcycle belonging to none other than the mysterious drug smuggler named Wonbin Park.
“Hey, take off your hood, silly, it’s rude,” Roxanne nudged, locking her car from the keys in her pocket more times than necessary.
“But… what if someone sees us?,” you whispered, walking closely beside her.
“Then I’m glad their eyes are working? Hell, I don’t fucking know what they’d want me to tell ‘em,” she shrugged, walking up to the front door.
“So are you acting like a nonchalant loser on purpose, or is this just your way of trying to calm me down?”
Roxanne laughed hysterically at your words, showcasing the sparkly pink gem decorating her upper canine teeth as she patted you on the back.
“We’re just here for weed, babe. That will help calm you down before I can.”
You had almost missed the part where she knocked as you got lost in your head, the front door suddenly opening and basking you both with a sudden warmth, contrasting with the cold evening weather.
“Roxie?,” asked the male from the doorstep that you fought with every bone in your body to avoid making eye contact with.
“Wonie?” Your friend mocked goofily, walking up to hug the boy briefly before grabbing your hand and pulling you inside, “I hope you don’t mind that I brought a friend.”
“Not at all, my place is always open to you and your girlfriends,” he chirped with forced yet gentle enthusiasm.
“Uhhhh, she’s just a friend, considering how we’ve only slept together while clothed before… but thanks anyway!”
“Any time,” he replied confidently, walking up to the sink that was conveniently in his living room before re-lighting the dead bud of the joint he held gracefully between his plump lips, ashes falling from the tip before he inhaled a thick huff.
Some of the ash fell on his lower abdomen, and you were just now realizing that he didn’t have a shirt on.
Good thing you were used to the smell of pot by now, thanks to Roxanne’s inevitable habit of greening out every Friday night.
“So, what brings you ladies in today? I’d hate to break it to you, but I used my last condom just a few hours ago.”
“Yeah, we’re actually here for a different kind of pipe this time,” Roxanne answered, blinking as if trying to communicate with him to ditch the wild language.
“Oh,” he said, doe eyes widening as his mouth hung a little, his bunny teeth shining right back at you.
Stop staring at his mouth.
Stop staring at his mouth-
“I uh… I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or anything,” he smiled softly, and of course you noticed because that’s where your eyes were glued the entire time, so distracted that it startled you when he reached to shake your hand.
“I’m Wonbin, but… you can call me anything you like, really.”
“It’s alright,” you returned, finally coming back to the present, “I’m ____.”
His initially confident demeanor stemmed from his assumption that you were more flamboyant like Roxanne, but he made note to be less vulgar until he could tell you warmed up to him.
Until he properly warmed up to you.
“So uh, yeah, do you want the usual, or were you thinking to try something new?” Wonbin asked casually as he leaned on the back of the sofa.
“Hmm,” Roxie hummed in thought, “yeah, my usual’s good. Just lay off the stronger stuff in the mix, though. It’s her first time.”
Something about what she said made Wonbin smile, wide and excited, peeking at you through his shaggy bangs with zero intent of hiding it.
Was he… flirting with you?
“Well, it’s my pleasure to be your first then,” he winked, getting up from the couch and heading to another room on his flat.
“You two kittens just wait here and I’ll be back with your stuff in a minute,” he claimed, which actually ended up being around an 8 minute wait while you and Roxanne went on and on about something you can’t even remember now.
The smile evaporated from Roxanne’s face as Wonbin returned to the living room while reciting the order. “You’ve got two ounces of-”
“I know the recipe, moron. You might scare my friend away if you say it out loud…,” she joked, feigning a pout as she hugged your shoulder, “so how much do you want for it, candy man?”
“It’s on the house this time,” Wonbin said, “so long as you bring me dinner tonight.”
“Fucking fat ass,” she spat, “what’re you craving?”
“Something warm,” he replied almost immediately, “with seasoned meat and a sauce… Maybe some rice, too.”
“Gotcha,” Roxie chirped as she pushed off of her knees to stand up.
Wonbin walked up to hand her the goody bag with such politeness, almost in the way that a child would give something to his big sister.
“Cool. I like eating around 7 o’clock, so you know when and where to find me.”
“Yes, through your stomach and all the way up to your greedy little heart.”
“Mhm,” he said with a satisfied hum, taking Roxanne’s spot on the couch as she walked towards the door. You and Wonbin were now sitting next to each other, his arms spread out on the back of the couch in a relaxed manner.
“Uhm, ____?”
“Oh, right! Sorry… I didn’t know we were finished,” you stammered, getting up from the couch to meet Roxanne at the door.
“Yeah, took him long enough,” she rolled her eyes, “I was starting to think he wanted us to spend the night…”
“Alright, get out of my apartment already,” he said playfully, waving a hand as if shooing you two, “and make sure to secure the bottom lock for me, I don’t feel like getting back up yet.”
“Whatever.”
Slam.
The door was closed, 50% locked, and you two were heading back down the staircase, cold air greeting you once again before you both got back in the car, driving back to your dorm room to drop off the drugs first, and then to the grocery store…
… to buy a bag of rice and a fresh pack of chicken.
“WHAT’S THAT NOISE?,” Roxanne asked with animatedly furrowed eyebrows, holding the grocery bag you two had packed Wonbin’s “dinner” in.
You ended up making a chicken roast with carrots, potatoes, gravy, and steamed rice like he asked.
“Here, hold this,” Roxanne mumbled, barely loud enough for you to hear before she dropped the bag, your reflects luckily kicking in fast enough for you to catch it before the glass container could hit the concrete stair well.
“It’s as cold as a snowman’s grave out here, Wonie, open up!,” She yelled while banging on the front door, the little dream catcher that hung on the inner side jingling with her forceful hits, “Hellooooo?”
“You’re like Doordash but with the temper of FedEx,” you heard a deep voice say from behind the walls.
“But I only charge herbal fees for my services,” she added while crossing her arms.
Creek.
The door slung open, Wonbin’s muscular arms framing the entrance with a fed up look plastered on his face.
There were two people sitting behind him on the couch playing video games. A violent game, you’d assume, given the sporadic and sharp flashes of light that filled the room.
“Is there some kind of a secret password now or something?,” Roxanne asked impatiently, not as entertained my the view of Wonbin’s still shirtless body like you were.
“Oh, right… come on in ladies,” he said with a feigned smile, extending a hand to welcome you two back in, “hope you brought enough food, because I have guests.”
You followed Roxanne and Wonbin to the kitchen, where you placed the steaming bag of food on the counter before taking out the containers. That’s when Roxanne started grabbing dishes from the cabinet.
The glass plates clinked behind you as you went to search for a serving spoon in the drawer. “Hey… where are the spoons and forks?,” you asked while still looking through one of his kitchen drawers before Wonbin suddenly tapped you on the shoulder.
“I uhm… I keep the utensils in here,” he smiled shyly, just as he reached for the overhead counter to grab the silverware he kept in a box. Your breath got caught in your chest as you felt his hips nearly fuse with yours in the moment. Luckily, he couldn’t see how flustered you appeared underneath his shadow.
“Gimme that,” Roxanne giggled, snatching the box from him and taking out two large ladles, one for the rice and another for the roast.
“Gosh, that smells amazing! Can you put cheese on mine, pretty please?,” you heard one of the boys ask from the couch, peeking over his shoulder with soft eyes.
“Yes, Taro, I can put some cheese on it for you… even though I think it’s weird,” Roxanne smiled.
“Ahh, thanks man. Oh- and who’s the new girl?” He went on, placing the controller down as he was no longer interested in playing.
“Just a friend in need of a good time—” Wonbin answered, which shocked you to say the least, “—so be nice, Sungchan.”
“Of course! Why wouldn’t I be?,” The taller boy pitched in, “but does she even talk?”
The room went quiet for a moment, the only sound being Sungchan’s clicks from the remote controller before he got gunned down by a random player.
“Dammit, Shotaro! Why’d you stop playing? Now we’re tied with the other team!!”
“Too bad, so sad, bro. I’m hungry,” he chirped, getting up from the couch to help you bring the plates to everyone.
“Woah, who’s the big plate for?” Shotaro asked with widened eyes.
“Me and Sungchan,” Roxanne said with a satisfied smile, “we’re sharing.”
“Oh… you didn’t tell me you and Sungchan were on good terms now,” you said, breaking your awkward streak of silence, just now recognizing the taller boys face from Roxanne’s phone.
She always talked about Sungchan and his “big stupid dick,” as she liked calling it.
The pair stopped being cool with each other for reasons you don’t really remember anymore, but you’d take her sudden affection towards him over the violence you witnessed during one of her texting fits the other night.
“Shhh,” she giggled, meeting Sungchan on the couch before sitting on his lap, “I hope you don’t mind me feeding you in front of your little friends… unless that makes you shy,” she pouted.
All he did was open his mouth in response, savoring the taste of the first spoon she fed him.
It was a sickeningly cute sight to be honest.
“Sick and twisted,” Shotaro said as if reading your mind.
“Cry about it,” Sungchan joked between a mouth full of saucy rice, heart swelling from the way Roxanne cooed at him.
You and Wonbin were just now making it to the living room after getting some napkins for everyone. There was room left for the two of you on the couch thanks to Roxie sitting on Sungchan’s lap, but that meant you and Wonbin would be sandwiched together in the middle.
Great.
“Come on guys, take a seat,” Roxie said before taking a bite of the food, her teeth grazing the metal fork with a loud scrap.
“God, I hate when you do that,” Sungchan sighed, tickling her sides as she laughed uncontrollably.
“Stop that, asshole, before I drop this food everywhere!”
“That’d be a shame, this chicken is so good,” Wonbin hummed with a nod, stuffing his cheeks with more of the gravy.
“____ made it,” Roxie pitched, giving you a look.
Despite how hard you tried to fight it, you were started to feel pretty awkward.
You knew it had a lot to do with Wonbin, thanks to his cripplingly annoying quirk to not put a damn shirt on.
You did eventually warm up to everyone, even pitching in on some of Sungchan’s dad jokes.
Though, the stack of empty dishes in the center of the living room table seemed more alive than your spirits right now.
The inevitable tiredness that came with staying up late without a phone in your hand started to kick in.
“Hey, I’m gonna go wash up these dishes real quick,” Wonbin said, glancing your way for reasons you almost couldn’t process between the loud laughter of Shotaro and Roxie over whatever dirty joke Sungchan told about SpongeBob and Patrick.
Did he want you to come with him? Alone?
Yes.
By now, Wonbin was no longer in the living room, having walked to the kitchen sink where he proceeded to run soapy dish water.
The scent of lemon wafted through the dimly lit space as you stepped beside him to get the dish towel.
“Sorry,” you said nervously, noticing the way he jumped as your hand grazed his arm slightly.
“It’s alright, you just surprised me,” Wonbin smiled, drying his hands before walking over to the other side of the counter, opening a plastic bag filled with what appeared to be blunt wraps and another bag filled with fluffy green.
“You just leave that stuff out on your counter?,” You asked, voice kind of quiet over the running water.
“Mhm…,” he started, “it’s not like the cops are just gonna raid my house randomly… unless… you were to say something,” he winked, putting a filler along the inside of the wrap before sprinkling in some herb, then tucking it tightly.
“Your secrets safe with me,” you said, the faucet squeaking as you turned the water off.
“____.”
“Yes?” You asked in confusion almost… he was already starting to use your name so normally.
“Pass me that lighter from over there,” he pointed before sticking his tongue out, licking the inner side on the blunt wrap to seal it.
His pretty tongue glistened underneath the kitchen lights, captivating you once again.
Fuck, stop staring, you internally swore at yourself.
He put the blunt between his lips, waiting for you to light the tip. “Stop moving, silly,” you giggled, holding his face in place with your other hand to keep him still as he playfully moved his head around to give you a hard time.
A tiny giggle erupted from his throat, too, making your smile linger for a little longer before he bid his thanks, inhaling a huff of the smoke and exhaling it through his nose.
“Hmmm,” he hummed as he cleared his throat. By now you were leaning against the sink with no intention of washing the dishes any time soon. No intention of leaving the kitchen, either.
“C’mere,” he offered, reaching for your chin in the same way you did to him earlier before inching closer to your face.
“Wonbin-”
“Just part your lips for me, okay?” He asked in a light voice, “I want you to try it with me.”
You nodded at his words, hesitantly parting your lips as he slowly set the blunt between the opening you allowed for him.
“Okay now seal your lips,” he said, licking his own, “and inhale… slowly.”
You obeyed his words, taking a steady breath in as the warm and cloudy smoke filled your mouth… then your stomach… then your senses.
“Oh, shit,” you cursed, coughing at the way the smoke hit the back of your throat, to which Wonbin only laughed at your reaction.
“Good job, newbie,” he teased, running you a glass of water before passing it to you, your teary eyes staring back at him in a mix of embarrassment, regret, and intrigue.
“How was hitting it,” he asked, pearly eyes staring back at you.
“Just as bad as I thought,” you admitted.
“Yeah… they effects will start kicking in pretty fast, too,” he chuckled, proceeding to take a huff from the same blunt. “But,” he started, voice falling to an alto, “you know that wasn’t free, right?”
“Excuse me?” You asked, watching as he lazily cradled the joint in his two fingers.
“I only do favors for Roxie because we’re chill like that…,” he paused, biting his lip derisively as he tilted his head, “I hardly know you, though.”
You didn’t even bother checking your pockets because you knew you came empty handed.
“Aww, what is it, baby?,” he cooed, turning your chin to face him again as he took another huff from the joint.
“I didn’t bring any cash with me, unfortunately,” you replied with a halfhearted expression, already feeling yourself get dizzy.
He noticed the way you began to tear up even more from the smoke he was now gently blowing in your face.
“You’re eyes look pretty right now,” he smiled, staring way harder than he should’ve, “how do you feel?”
All of a sudden your core starting to heat up, making your legs feel as though you were merely hovering over the floor. You didn’t feel grounded anymore because you were overcome with a feeling of light.
“A little warm,” you started dryly, “but like… numb and euphoric at the same time.”
“In here?” He asked, placing a hand on your upper stomach, resting dangerously close to your tits.
“No…. It’s uh… a bit lower,” you said, reaching for his wrist before pulling his hand away from you.
That’s when you caught a glimpse of a colorful splash decorating his wrist. “That’s pretty,” you smiled, adoring the tattoo from afar.
“You think so?” He asked sarcastically before whispering in your ear, “too bad compliments won’t pay my bills.”
You sighed at his words, watching as he braced his body weight on the counter before your right hand found a mind of it’s own, reaching out to trace a line up his defined abdomen.
“Then allow me to repay you in another way,” you offered, poking his flesh with your nail a bit, “you like my cooking, don’t you?”
“Very much so, yes. But you could try pleasing me somewhere else… ‘A bit lower,’ like you said,” he whispered seductively, eyes in a daze as he guided your hand by your delicate wrist to the center of his belt buckle, a line of hair leading to the bulge buried behind his baggy jeans.
A thick vein trailed from his thumb to his forearm before his grip left your wrist.
“Wanna take a closer look?” He offered, drawing your attention back to the colorful spot on his skin even though your first mind thought he was talking about something naughtier.
“Sure,” you answered quietly, taking his hand again to examine the design, “a butterfly?”
“A moth, actually… it’s a little more masculine if you ask me,” he added, the shadow of a proud smile ghosting over his lips.
“But it has watercolored eyes,” you pointed out.
“True… So it’s like.. more ambiguous I guess?”
“Maybe… or it could just be a beautiful man,” you voiced, stroking over his skin with the pad of your thumb.
You liked this.
The look of his skin, but more so the way it felt.
The way touching him made you feel.
“Uhmmmm, guys?,” Shotaro cried out from the living room, the energy in his voice breaking the stillness of the moment, “I’m pretty sure Sungchan and Roxie are about to start fucking each other in a few seconds, and I could use a little help in here!”
You and Wonbin made eye contact at Shotaro’s words, the same thought filling both your heads:
“What?”
“Just get in here, quickly! They’re taking each others clothes off!!!”
“FUCK, MY STOMACH still hurts like a bitch from laughing so hard yesterday night,” Roxie sighed, cheeks a flushed hue either from the three shots of brandy she just guzzled or the three comforters she was wrapped in on her side of your shared room.
“Yeah… I had a great time hanging out with everyone,” you said, only half-present as other thoughts floated around in your mind.
Thoughts about when you would get to see Wonbin again?
What you two would even do?
How Roxanne would react if she knew Wonbin had been stuck in your mind like gum on a-
“What the hell are you thinking about?”
Oh shit.
“Uhm… Nothing, why?”
“It’s gotta be something,” Roxie pressed, staring at you from across the room through her false eyelashes, “you were moaning in your sleep last night with that same look on your face.”
Wow. She was quite a fast talker for someone so tipsy.
“I was?”
“Mhm,” she smirked cheekily, trailing a finger along the knitted seam of her bed sheet.
“Tell me who you were thinking about… I’ll know if you’re lying, too,” she pressed.
“I was just… gosh, why is that making me so flustered,” you sighed, hiding your face in your pillows.
“C’mon, spit it out, ____!”
“I was thinking about Wonie, okay?,” you finally admitted, hoping it would make her shut up.
“Hmm…,” she started with a satisfied smirk, “you’ve already starting calling him by a nickname, I see… what’s up with that?”
“Nothing at all,” you smiled aggressively, watching as she spread herself out on the mattress like a star fish, “would you like me to call Sungchan over to keep you company while I’m out?”
“He’s already on his way over, silly,” she smiled, flexing her fingers around nothing, “wait, where are you going, anyway?”
“Nowhere special… probably just gonna talk a walk around campus. But don’t worry, I’ll wait for your boyfriend to get here before I leave.”
She pouted at your words, lower lip poking out like a baby, “Aww… stupid… big dick Sungie’s my boyfriend… ehehe…”
SUNGCHAN SHOWED UP shortly after you managed to get Roxanne back to bed. Praying that they wouldn’t end up fucking in your bedroom while you were gone, you put on a jacket with hopes of taking that walk to clear your head, even though now you simply hit a joint to calm your nerves.
That’s when you heard a pair of footsteps approaching from outside your door, just as you were about to zip up your winter boots.
Knock, knock, knock.
A a warm feeling erupted in your stomach, making your fingers freeze at your ankles.
Standing up to peek through the door-hole, you saw Wonbin’s plump lips first, before his bright brown eyes stared back at you.
Shit, why was he here?
“Hey, I can hear you breathing from behind the door… well, whoever you are,” he giggled, which made you giggle a bit too.
There’s no way you were gonna get out of this now, but you still counted down from ten before opening the door.
“Hi,” you smiled, letting him in, “don’t know how you got on campus, let alone to my dorm room, but okay.”
“I’m friends with Roxie, remember?”
“Yes, but I don’t remember you visiting here before… like, ever.”
Even if he had, it’s not like you’d be able to forget a face or presence like his.
“Nice shirt, by the way,” you teased, poking him in the stomach to which he smiled.
That terribly cute smile of his.
“Yeah I uh… wear them sometimes,” he replied, adjusting the beanie he wore before speaking again, “Where is she, anyway?”
“Pretending to be asleep so I can cuddle with her while she sucks on me… well… not there but… nevermind,” Sungchan interupted, walking from the room with now disheveled hair.
“Hell, I left for like three seconds, what happened,” you asked, observing the fresh purple bruise on Sungchan’s neck.
“Roxie gets unbelievably horny whenever she’s drunk for some reason, and I refuse to do anything with her when half of her mind is on fucking mars,” he sighed, going to the fridge and pulling out a can of soda.
“She’s lucky I let her do this much… Wait- I thought you said you weren’t coming?” Sungchan said to Wonbin with a suspicious look.
So Wonbin was invited to your place. How fun.
“Ahh, I changed my mind out of boredom...”
“Right,” Sungchan nodded while walking to the front door, “I’ve gotta go get a lighter from my truck, but I’ll be back if Roxie asks for me.”
“Hey uh, me and ____ can go get it for you if you want,” Wonbin offered, flashing you a look.
“Really, I mean I parked pretty far away, but-”
“It’s fine, really, I saw where your truck on my way here.“
“____?” Sungchan said your name as if searching for your approval, to which you nodded which a humble, “Yeah, I don’t mind.”
“Alright then, go ahead. But take your time though so you don’t slip and break your asses…”
WONBIN LOOKED IN the roof compartment of Sungchan’s truck, just as the lighter fell down, slipping between the small crack in the seat.
“Shit,” he cursed upon trying to reach for it, “my hands too big to get it.”
“Hey, I can try getting it for you,” you offered, watching as he made room for you to take his place in the vehicle.
The drawstring of your underwear clinging to your hips as your shirt fell down your waist with gravity.
“Are you wearing a thong?” Wonbin asked, cold index finger hooking with the thin strap of your panties before pulling back and releasing it with a snap.
“Ahh, what the hell, Won!,” You yelped, retreating from the seat to swat his hands from you, “you’re supposed to be helping me!”
“No, we’re supposed to be helping Sungchan. Now get back to work,” he order you playfully, pointing back down to where the lighter fell.
You shook your head, bending back over in an attempt to retrieve the lighter once again.
He was only teasing you because he wanted to see more of your personality.
He couldn’t say that things were moving fast between you thanks to the inevitably awkward grounds your first impression of each other was cultivated upon, but he still wanted to get past the shy stage.
Skip all of the a baby steps and just start running with you.
Weakened grunts fell from your lips as you desperately fished for the lighter, your hips looking a mere second from bursting through your tight jeans given the position you were in.
“Shit,” Wonbin cursed under his breath, feeling a sense of warmth grow on his cheeks as he darted his eyes away from you.
“Oh,” you said with a muffled sounding voice.
“Um, y-yeah? What’s up?” He stuttered, still looking off into the distance.
“I’ve got the lighter… And some spare change,” you chirped, clasping the findings in your hand before reaching a foot down cautiously.
“Isn’t that stealing?” Wonbin teased, finally looking back to only see your foot slipping on the wet condensation from the truck’s running board.
“____, watch your step!” He called out with a slightly raised voice, his hands finding your waist to protect your fall, which only led to you both tumbling down together.
A strained groan erupted from Wonbin’s throat as his back hit the cold hard ground first, your body weight falling onto his center as your hands hit the gravel, slightly scuffing your skin.
You hadn’t even realized that your eyes were closed the entire time until you finally opened them, the coins you held being scattered about as Wonbin’s wide bunny eyes scanned you with shock.
His arms framed his head, nose a little red from the weather and a sprinkle of snowflakes dusting his black beanie.
“Are you…are you okay?,” he started, voice trailing off as it finally clicked in his mind that you were straddling him on the ground, essentially in public.
He couldn’t pin a finger on what it was about you that made him feel all shy like this, especially whenever he wasn’t buzzed.
“I-I’m… uh… I’m fine,” you stuttered, freeing him of your body weight and extending a hand to help him up.
“Thank you,” he huffed, a puff of cold air escaping his mouth before circling around your warm bodies, “I told you to watch your step….”
“Hey, it’s not my fault that those stupid coins distracted me,” you shivered, just now feeling the effects of the weather as goosebumps sprouted on your skin, “At least I got the lighter, though!”
Wonbin chuckled, both at your enthusiastic words and the uncanniness of this moment, taking off his beanie and adjusting it over your head before closing the door to Sungchan’s truck, pulling you close to him by the shoulder.
“Alright… let’s get back inside before we both freeze to death.”
AFTER GOING BACK inside, Sungchan had somehow managed to get Roxie out of bed, the four of you sitting on the couch while watching a random movie till midnight.
It all brought you a strange sense of déjà vu. You and Wonbin sitting awkwardly together while Roxie and her Sungchan sat like Siamese twins. The only thing missing, aside from some good home cooked food, was Shotaro’s infectious smile and a recreational drug in your system.
A soul booster.
You had gotten lost in your thoughts again, not even realizing when Roxie kissed Sungchan goodnight before he headed home.
Nor when Wonbin pretended to be sleep so no one would wake him as you slept peacefully on his shoulder.
Nor how he left your side once Roxie went to her room to sleep, reaching for the dust-ridden acoustic guitar hiding in a corner of your loft after a long forgotten ex-roommate left it behind as a “farewell” gift.
Nor the warm and woody melody he started to play from the other end of the couch, the gentle hums from his throat luring your busy mind from its slumber.
Your eyes opened with lazy blinks, vision slowly keening in on the lit joint that hung from his mouth, the sound of his fingers sliding against the fretboard and strings sending shivers down your spine.
Or maybe that had more to do with the winter air thrumming through your dorm room's cheap windows.
From the look outside, you’d guess it was sometime around 1am.
The stars were sparkling in the sky and the world beneath almost dead quiet.
“Oh- sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” Wonbin said in a half-whisper, noticing the way you were glancing at him before taking the blunt from his mouth.
“Oh, no… it’s okay, I was just… I didn’t mind…” your words trailed off to a mumble as you sat up a little straighter on the couch, rubbing the sleep from your eyes, “What song was that? It sounded really pretty from what I heard.”
“Yesterday… by the Beatles,” he smiled, getting up to set the guitar back in its original place of abandonment, “it would’ve sounded even better though if I had a pick with me.”
He took another huff from the blunt, exhaling through his nose in a familiar manner as he offered it to you, “Want some?”
“Sure,” you shrugged, taking the blunt from his hand before inhaling the herb yourself, though, it was slightly different from the one you had in Wonbin’s kitchen the other night.
“It’s some of Sungchan’s pot,” he said in a husk voice as if reading your mind, “Don’t go too crazy though, ‘cause his shit’s pretty strong.”
He peeked at you through his wavy bangs, waiting for a cough from you that never came.
“Are you buzzed yet?” You asked after taking another huff or two yourself, playing with the smoke in your mouth before blowing it out slowly.
“Yeah,” he chuckled, “don’t know how I managed to play a full song, but... yeah... I'm trashed.”
“It must be a talent, I guess,” you hummed at his words, just now noticing the lit candles sitting at random areas in the kitchen and living room.
Good thing, because it helped to drown out the scent of marijuana.
“What else are you good at doing while high?”
His tongue clicked at the roof of his mouth as a subtle yet unmistakable smirk creeped on his face, perfectly matching the rosy hue that began to stain his cheeks.
“You thought of something dirty, didn’t you?”
“Maybe…” he chuckled, widening the distance between his legs a bit as he sat.
Was he… teasing you?
Your eyes fell down to the blunt he placed on the ashtray beside the table, it’s lit bud ceasing with a quiet hiss.
“I’m guessing that wasn’t free either, huh?” You joked, shaking your head at yesterday's memory.
“Nope,” he smiled, “but… you still haven’t returned the favor from your first hit, so I won’t be too mean for now.”
Of course he’d bring that up again.
Right here, right now as you sat mere inches in distance from each other, both buzzed out of your minds.
“And if you were to be mean,” you started hesitantly, biting your lower lip before continuing, “what would that look like?”
He thought on your words carefully before answering, “Well, I doubt it’ll ever come to that anyway, so don't worry about it.”
“Oh, and is it the weed making you confident all of a sudden?”
“No, just the simple fact that you’ll pretty much do anything I tell you to.”
You scoffed, “That’s crazy talk.”
“Is it?“ he pressed, inching closer to you. "Kiss me,” he said, lips just a gentle wind's push from touching yours.
You didn’t budge, but your heart beat escalated all the same.
“Cute,” he smirked, his large hand finding the length of your neck, gliding up to your jawline as his thumb toyed with your lower lip. “I can see it all over your face that you want me, ____.”
“Then why are you asking for it?,” you teased.
“Because I wanted to hear you say it first… even though I already knew you’d let me do this,” he whispered, closing the space between you with a kiss, his warm mouth engulfing yours as the scent of his woody cologne filled your senses.
His other hand found your lower back, pulling you impossibly close to him as the sound of both your hearts beating and his needy grunts consumed you.
Much like the watercolor moth on his wrist, Wonbin’s gentle and vibrant masculinity couldn’t get any more precious in this moment.
This is exactly what he was looking forward to, whether he decided to guise it under the façade of a favor or be completely straight up with you, he finally got you right where you wanted.
Your fingers tangled in his hair as you tugged a bit, desperate to hear more of his pretty sounds before the shadow of a smile wavered over Wonbin’s face at your actions, up until he felt your knee bump his hard-on through his pants, causing him to hiss.
“You’re being rough with me,” he said in between kissing your mouth, his hot and thick tongue darting past your lips as the kiss become messier.
Louder.
“And?” You asked, pulling away from his lips before leaving a trail of wetness down his neck, paying extra attention to a spot that made him twitch in his seat.
“And it’s so fucking hot,” he almost moaned when your teeth grazed his skin, his back meeting the couch arm as you subconsciously grinded your hips against his pants, straddling him.
“Is this how you wanted me earlier,” you said, stopping your movements, “when we were outside in the cold?”
By now his shirt was off and your fingers unbuckling his belt with gentle clinking sounds from the metal.
“No,” he said in an impossibly deep voice, looking dead at you as he spoke, “My first mind wanted to fuck you silly in the backseat… but I couldn’t to that to you.”
You giggled at his choice of words given how high you were, shimmying his pants down a bit further before halting at the waistband of his boxers, palming him gently through the fabric.
“Why not?” You asked in a soft voice, contrasting with the fierce grip you had on his clothed shaft.
“Because... even though you’re being an impossible tease right now, I felt like you deserved better than to be fucked in your best friends boyfriend's truck,” he said with a shaky voice, gripping at the couch to contain himself.
You appreciated his consideration in your heart, but didn’t wanna say anything out loud, especially not while your hands were on him like this.
And thank God for these thick curtains, otherwise the whole world would’ve seen how red his throbbing tip looked after finally being freed from the restrictions of his boxers.
You started at the base of his length before gliding upwards, spitting on the head that was already leaking a bit of his early release.
You started to pump him slowly, pearly white precum standing out as it mixed with your clear spit like watercolor.
“Use your mouth for me,” he almost begged, eyes falling victim to a blurry haze as his knuckles turned white with his grip on the cushions.
You teased him a bit by letting your warm breath ghost over his tip, eliciting a groan from him as his Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat.
The desperation inside of him only grew from here as your warm and wet lips finally wrapped around him.
You hollowed your cheeks a bit, hands resting at either side of his hips as you began using your tongue to help you take him inch by inch.
“Mmm, feels so fucking good, baby,” he said with a strained voice, his hands finding your head before his thumbs grazed your lips, one of them prying to squeeze itself into your mouth with his already thick cock.
The sight alone was enough to make him buss, so he threw his head back, biting his lip harshly to contain his sounds.
You hummed against his dick, almost feeling it in your chest once his hands pushed your head down further.
He just couldn’t deal with your teasing anymore, wanting to feel you more than he could begin to explain.
He bucked his hips upwards, rutting into your mouth like a bunny in heat. “Aww, fuck,” he cursed, watching the way your eyes glazed with tears.
He always managed to see you crying one way or another, and he loved it every single time.
Your fingernails dug into his sides as the sound of your gagging became hard to miss. He released your head with a sigh, panting as both of your faces burned with heat.
He didn’t expect you to start pumping him again though as soon as your mouth left his cock, but you knew he’d end up missing your warmth in seconds anyways.
“I wasn’t trying to be mean when I did that, by the way,” he sighed, biting his lip as you looked back at him with moist eyelashes, “I just couldn’t hold bac- nghhh~.”
A broken moan escaped his mouth once your hands found his balls, gently cradling them in your hands while alternating with pressures, your other hand still stroking him.
“I’m doing quite the favor for you, Wonbin,” you said with a rasp voice, your throat a bit sore from his actions on top of the smoke you huffed earlier, but he figured it made you sound hotter anyway. “Are you sure I’m not overdoing it?”
“Mmm… no, p-please don’t stop, baby,” he whimpered shamelessly, screwing his eyebrows tightly.
You felt yourself clench around nothing at the nickname, and judging from the way his face changed, you’d bet he noticed.
By now, he could hardly keep still, the muscles in his stomach flexing just as you felt his balls tighten, just as he was finished, chest heaving with need as you rode out his high.
That's when you started to take off your jeans, tossing them in the corner somewhere as he practically drooled at the sight of you in just a baggy top and panties, a dark spot forming at the center of your core where your arousal started to leak through.
“____,” he paused you, bringing you into his lap, your warm core sitting right atop his aching hardness, “you don’t have to go this far if you don’t want to.”
“Well maybe this isn’t just about me owing you anymore,” you whispered, kissing him on the corner of his mouth, “what if I want this?”
His cock stimulated you through your panties as he thought on your words, subconsciously rocking your hips back and forth.
“Then I’ll let you have your way with me…” he said with a rasp whisper, kissing up your neck as one of his hands massaged your tits, his other hand sneaking past your underwear to find your soaking wet clit, rubbing it slowly but with such a pressure that your fingers clung to his broad shoulders.
“I want you to make me feel like I’m falling apart,” he groaned against your skin, spreading your slick all over your aching pussy lips, “I want you to ruin me.”
You didn't waste any time with aligning him at your entrance, sliding down with ease most of the way given how wet you were.
He groaned as your tight walls fully consumed him.
“Fuck~,” you whined, feeling euphorically full as he started thrusting into you, hands gripping at your back as he became overstimulated inside you.
The drugs must've made you feel extra sensitive, especially with the way his tip fucked against your g-spot. You looked into his teary eyes, stoking his face as you helped to bounce with his movements, lewd sounds bouncing off of the walls.
“You’re being so fucking good for me, baby, just like that," he moaned as you clenched around him, too high to give a damn about filling you up raw with thick spurts of his cum.
“Wonie,” you whimpered, feeling as his hands roamed all over your climaxing body.
You felt every part of him in every part of you, and to say the least, it was worth all the awkward moments it took to get here.
THE NEXT MORNING, you woke up with your head resting on Wonbin’s chest, his messy hair spread about his head as you felt his breath faintly on your head. You probably looked like two babies with the way you were cuddling each other under the blanket.
It was a sickeningly cute sight, one might say.
“Sick and twisted,” you heard Shotaro say in the back of your mind, just as Wonbin groaned beneath you with a cat-like yawn.
“I still feel high,” was the first thing he said, making you giggle a little more than necessary before looking him in the face, the effects of your night together ever-present on his face.
“I feel…good,” you smiled.
“Good?”
“Yeah,” you hummed back, peeling yourself from his body as you blinked the tiredness from your eyes.
“You can keep a secret, right?” He asked hesitantly, voice barely audible given how quietly he spoke.
“With my whole life,” you answered, now making eye contact with him which was surprisingly way easier to do than a day ago.
He found your hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, “We should do each other favors more often… but… maybe not call it that.”
Was he initiating a sexual relationship with you?
Maybe something more?
“Well…” you started curiously, “what would you wanna call it instead, then?”
A grin peeped on his face that quickly softened when he licked his lips, giving your hand a squeeze once again before parting his lips to speak. “Maybe-”
“Fuck,” Roxanne sighed with annoyance, “you horny ducks didn’t blow my candles out last night… now the wax is no good,” she sulked.
“Oh, s-sorry about that, Roxie, we were smoking and it helped the smell,” Wonbin answered first.
“… wait, did you just call us horny ducks?” You asked with a mix of confusion, offense, and realization.
She heard you two.
Hell, of course she did.
“What? You think I didn’t hear Wonbin and his vocal ass practically singing as you did… whatever you did to him…?,” She rambled on, washing her hands in the sink before pulling some from produce from the fridge.
“Oh my God,” Wonbin cringed at himself, covering his face with his hands, though his ears were clearly burning red now.
“The blanket… you brought it in here, didn’t you,” you asked her, just now noticing that it was one she kept at the end of her bed.
“Yep! You’re welcome, freaks,” she chirped through a mouthful of raw celery, drawing your attention to the knife and cutting board she handled, “I’m gonna need your help soon though, ____. We're cooking for a mini get-together later with Taro and Sungchan.”
You hummed at her words, folding up the blanket while thankful that despite how high you two were last night, you managed to put your clothes back on before the sun came up.
“You guys should get cleaned up first, too, by the way,” she said, side-eyeing you as she diced a few green onions. “And preferably not at the same time, please... I’ve heard enough moans for the rest of this week, thanks to you two.”
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⚡︎ a/n: I just wanna say thank you to everyone who read this goofy lil piece I wrote !! It's been a while since I wrote something that wasn't requesting, and I had so much fun getting back in my creative mode again !! Hopefully you guys enjoyed it as much as I did huhu !!
📍 check out my NEW RIIZE masterlist
⚡︎ tag list: @ashgonedash @jaylaxies @fakeuwus @ot7sevenlvr @nqvgue @riizebinnie @cherriruto @sungbbinieworld @kvstjwonnie @yjshannie @hyunjinsnumberonefun @nikisdubblchococake @babigriin @greasywall @snrrpyzen @squoxle @wonbinkisser @quirkymoon @bominute @serenityqtz @bahraini-aphrodite @jewjewbee04 @minslatte @svtf1lms @suquitoz @hyunilinia @yeonkis @pixiewoni @loljungwon @sunwonkiworld @iizanaa @bambseung @deadpool15 @s1eepyanahi @wearscvn @spkyfy @urfavmommy @anna-357j @numberonetaleprince @write4cench @choqolei @zhonglele02 @xenkimmie @whoslio @leeknow-minho2 @songbird033
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your geto fic is super cute 🥰 if you're taking more requests, may I request a sukuna fic please? maybe in an au where he's a gangster and reader is of a classy, rich family so reader's parents don't agree, but then sukuna appears in one of their events in a suit and looking dashing as ever!
ooooooooo it's 3 am but i have to write this down!!!!!!!!!
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shadows and silk.
summary: sukuna shows you and your parents that he is absolutely the right and the only man for you (whether they agree or not) genre: angst/fluff pairing: gangster!sukuna x female reader warnings: cursing, modern day au, not a great parent-child relationship, ooc sukuna
Masterlist
-----
your father doesn't even bother to hide his disapproval. "he has tattoos on his face. what if he's in the mafia- what have you brought our family into?!"
"father-"
"i am," sukuna clarifies, "in the mafia. my father is the leader. and one day, it'll be my time to lead."
your parents gasp in shock, surprised by sukuna's brashness.
"that wasn't a threat," he clarifies again, holding your hand. "i love your daughter, and i'd like to have a good relationship with you both. because it's important to her."
you smile appreciatively and grasp his hand, looking at your parents with hope.
"you're fucking insane."
-----
it was probably not the wisest decision to ask for your parents' approval, knowing what kind of people they are. being one of the richest families in the country, it's hard to have... any kind of life outside of what they had planned for you. like a pawn in their game of chess, your choices have been made for you since the very beginning.
unlike sukuna, you grew up "perfect". you aced your piano lessons, easily graduated from your violin school, and got straight As in all your grades. every day was the same for you; wake up, school, extra lessons, homework, sleep, and repeat.
that's actually how you met sukuna. one day, there was something wrong with the traffic so your driver was late. you'd been waiting for an hour, and sukuna just happened to finish his detention.
"hm?" his eyes caught you standing by the gate. "aren't you that rich kid?"
you looked up at him and analyzed his face -- high school student with face tattoos, you don't see that very often. "who's asking?"
"tsk, tsk." he chuckled, "so much attitude for a little person." he ruffled your hair before walking in the other direction. "wanna come? i'm gonna go have some fun."
fun... the word was so unfamiliar to you. you'd never talked to him before, and though it really was probably dangerous to just go with someone whose name you didn't even know, you couldn't help yourself. especially not when he turned around with a smile, urging you to come with him.
he took you to places you've never been before and made you feel things you've never felt. you felt free from your parents' chains, for once you felt like you could do whatever you wanted.
and sukuna was glad he could make you smile. you, the girl who always kept to herself in class, quiet, polite, almost scared. you made him feel things, too.
you got an earful from your parents that day, but the cute keychain sukuna won you from the night market was worth it.
now, the keychain hangs on your favorite bag, one that he also got you a few weeks ago. though you already have multiple designer bags that are much more expensive, the bag sukuna gave you was priceless.
"morning, baby." sukuna greets you, kissing your cheek.
"morning," you smile at him. "i'm sorry for how yesterday went. my father, he's-"
"let him be," he says. "nothing can keep me away from you, understand?"
you smile at his words and nod, "you better keep it as a promise."
sukuna smiles and kisses you, "i swear it."
he wonders what he could've possibly done to deserve someone like you.
-----
"what do you mean i'm getting married?"
your father sighs. "don't be difficult. the gojo clan is the most powerful, you should be thankful they're letting you marry their son."
"but father, i have a boyfriend, and i just graduated college! i- i can't marry, i still have so much i want to-"
"enough!" he yells, "you're marrying gojo satoru by the end of next month and that's final."
you're lucky that you have your own apartment. dialing sukuna's number, you get into your car and drive home where sukuna says he's waiting for you.
"ugh, unbelievable!" you throw your keys on the table, letting it slide off and annoying you even more.
he grimaces and sits you down, handing over a glass of water. "so it didn't go well..."
you sigh, "...they're arranging a marriage. with the gojo clan."
sukuna's jaw clenches, anger evident, but then it disappears. "that makes sense. they are the strongest and the richest."
"they're not giving me an option, like always-"
"gojo satoru is pretty handsome," he continues, "blue eyes, tall, quite built.. he's not a bad bachelor."
you squint your eyes at your boyfriend who seems like he's talking nonsense... or not really. "what are you trying to say?"
sukuna sighs. "we should break up."
the words that come out of his mouth after that are all blurry to you. something along the lines of...
"we've been together for years."
"it's time to get a fresh start."
"aren't you curious what it's like to date other people?"
"i'm getting bored to be honest."
and it all just seems like bullshit. bullshit because why is he looking at you like that when he's breaking up with you? why does he look like he's still madly in love with you and saying all that stuff is killing him?
why does he look like he's lying?
"tell me you're joking."
sukuna, unfortunately, doesn't humor you and leaves you alone in your apartment without saying anything else.
the rest of the month feels like hell. you tried running away from your parents, the guards they sent after you, but to no avail. somehow, they've repurchased your apartment and now you're back to living with them.
you met gojo satoru once throughout the entire month. he's decent, and actually a good guy like sukuna said, but he's not sukuna. he doesn't leave a random flower he picked up on the way to your place, he doesn't shower your hands with kisses when he sees you, and that's all expected -- because it's not supposed to be a loving relationship. it's a contract. once you marry him, your parents' company will merge with the gojos and become even richer.
today's the engagement party. your mother has chosen the perfect red gown for good luck, and she's made all the preparations for the party -- you, like always, never had a say in anything.
you feel like an object for them to trade with. compared to the gold bars sitting in their safe, you're probably worth less.
"i know you also didn't agree to this," gojo satoru whispers as you're both sat down in the middle of the ballroom while everyone else enjoys their meal. "but you look beautiful."
you offer him a polite smile, which turns rather sad. hidden in your sleeve is the keychain sukuna got you. your mother managed to throw away every cherished memory you had of him except for the keychain.
you wonder what sukuna is doing right now... if he's enjoying his life, if he maybe has a new girl by his side...
"sorry to shit on your party," your head snaps up the moment you hear that familiar voice, and a gasp escapes when you see the even more familiar tattooed face with pink hair. "but i'm going to have to kidnap your fiancee for a bit. maybe forever."
"..ryo." you stand up abruptly, letting your chair fall and hit the ground. he's dressed in a white suit, black vest, black shirt, and a matching black tie. he looks like he's ready to be your groom.
giving you the smile you miss most, sukuna stands in front of you and grabs your hand. "hi, princess."
"what are you doing here?" you whisper, tears about to fall from your eyes.
"saving my damsel in distress." he softens when he sees your lip tremble, kissing you gently. "i told you nothing can keep me away from you."
"but you-"
behind you, gojo satoru clears his throat, motioning to the many guards surrounding both of you, ready to pull you two apart by force.
"let my daughter go right now." your father demands.
you grasp sukuna's arm tightly, not planning on letting him go any time soon. in return, he has his arm around your waist, pulling you to him gently before he snaps his fingers, revealing rows and rows of armed men ready to fire.
the guards immediately stand down, obviously outnumbered. they let you and sukuna leave without a fight, and you stop for a second to spare a glance at your parents, looking at you disapprovingly.
-----
you're sitting on sukuna's bed. you've only been to this place a few times, considering he moves around a lot. he's helping you with the infinity amount of hairpins you have stuck in your hair while you take off the red gown you're wearing.
"ryo," you call him.
he hums to acknowledge you, mouth full of hairpins.
"...why did you break up with me?"
taking out the last piece of hairpin (he thinks it's the last), he throws them away before sitting behind you, arms snaked around your waist, his head resting on your shoulder.
"i... i thought i was doing you a favor," he admits, "with my job... it's not easy being with me, you know? i'm scared you'll think i'm a monster for what i do - it still terrifies me."
"so i thought if i just pushed you away, it'll make things easier for both of us," his grip on you tightens, "but it didn't. at least not for me. and i know i'm being selfish here by wanting you back, i know i don't deserve it, but i just... i can't imagine living without you. i'm sorry. i'm so sorry."
you turn around to face him, straddling his thighs and kissing him softly. "if being selfish means i'm stuck with you, then you need to be more selfish."
he grins, arms wrapping around you. "i love you."
"i love you more, ryo."
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justporo · 8 months
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More fluffy relationship headcanons for Astarion and Tav
Thinking about my Tav and Astarion keeps filling my head with ideas and small moments I think they might share. So have some more? (Also let me know if you want spicy ones... because ofc I have many of those as well...) Please be aware I haven't finished playing and might stray from canon events from the ending. So have more headcanons and ideas for Astarion and my Tav.
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HUGS! Gods, all of them. Once this man starts he never stops. He espcially has found that he likes hugs from behind. When he's behind you just putting his arms around you, pulling you to his chest, putting his head on yours or on your shoulder - also allows him to nibble on your pointy ear or press kisses to your neck or... you know.
But he also likes when you hug him from behind and press your face against his back. You letting your hands wander, but "uh uh, keep it above the waistline in public, you naughty little thing"
Tav - before she might try something like that - ALWAYS making sure he's fine with touching and especially displays of affection in public; Tav makes him promise ("cross your undead heart!") to immediately stop and call her out if she ever oversteps a boundary or if he feels just a tad uncomfortable because setting these boundaries in the first place is still hard
But he loves public displays of affection (and even sometimes being a little naughty, making people around the both of you flustered); he's still a hedonist after all and now he can really live it on his own accord
He especially can't get enough of you not being able to keep your hands off him; knowing you love and adore him boosts his goddamn ego to newly known heights
But he's also focused on making sure people know you are taken, so he can be a little bit possessive to mark his territory; especially if someone trying to hit on you doesn't get the memo that you are not interested and that that's a very jealous vampire standing behind you
Ah jealousy - you've talked about this: Astarion may be open to you having other complimentary arrangements but seeing just the shadow of a doubt in his eyes this is SO off the table; also you are pretty sure you couldn't handle your jealousy - so a definite no for the both of you (absolutely no shade here for anyone imagining poly-relationships or such with Astarion but that's the way I imagine it for him and my Tav)
Romantically there is no need to clarify for each of you: for him there is only you and for you there is only Astarion
So that means: you both can get really quite jealous but you also like taking the piss out of each other; also he's flirty by nature and you might've taken on a bit of his personality in this regard, this all making for a very... interesting mix
Huh, this is already longer than I thought and each point could've easily become much longer... But oi, I have to get other stuff done as well.
Have my Tav and Astarion kssing as a bonus (still makes me giggle and twirl my hair everytime - I'm so lost...)
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shina913 · 2 months
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Code Blue | KMG
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Code Blue
Pairing: PFWeek!Mingyu x Stylist!Fem Reader
Rating: M 🔞; NSFW
Genre: Idol au; hints of FWB; fluff; angst; smut
Warnings: porn with a hint of plot; cussing; fingering; clit play; breast play; oral (F-rcvng); penetrative, unprotected sex; creampie; soft aftercare
Word count: 3.8K words
Summary: Mingyu doesn't want any other stylist--he only wants you.
A/N: The story was prompted by this video clip and title is from The-Dream's song of the same title. I only meant for this to be something quick but the clown car stopped by my house--it was headed to Deluluville so I just got on, ofc. Nothing but horny word vomit featuring Dior/PFW Mingyu. Tiny bit of angst brought on by the song, and also because I'm me, and why the hell not? Enjoy!
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It’s fashion week and by some wild coincidence, many of your A-list celebrities are in town and they all have scheduled appearances at the big-ticket shows. Unfortunately, due to the location of a few shows and heavy traffic, you can't personally manage everyone's looks. So, you rely on your trusted assistants to cater to everyone's preferences, under your guidance, of course.
One of the clients you couldn't personally attend to was Mingyu. He called you, disappointed, when he saw your assistant, Monica, standing at his hotel room door with a clothing rack to present him with outfit options for tomorrow's show.
“Why did you send your minion here? I thought you were coming?” You hear the pout in his lowered voice.
“I'm at a fitting with another client at their hotel, and it's running late,” you whisper into the phone, then motion to an intern to approve your client's accessories. “Also, I'd appreciate it if you didn't call her that. She's my second-in-command, and I trust her judgment. I can't be everywhere at once, so some compromises had to be made.”
Mingyu’s debut appearance at a major fashion show was a big deal for him and his career. Since his appearance was announced, you prepared accordingly, discussing options based on the fashion house's lookbook. Having worked closely with Mingyu for over a year, you're well-versed in his style preferences. Before he left for Paris, you had shortlisted two outfit options, which is why you felt confident leaving Monica in charge.
“So, I’m the one compromised? I heard you’re dressing a couple of people for Chanel and another one for Saint Laurent. You can’t do that for me?” He huffs out.
You hiss through gritted teeth and excuse yourself to take the rest of your call in the bathroom. “There’s no need to be childish! Those two shows are right next to each other, while yours is across town. I can’t reach you in that short timeframe. Have you seen the traffic?”
He eventually concedes, softening his tone. “I’m sorry. I was just…hoping to see you since we're both in town. I thought that maybe we could grab dinner tonight at that restaurant we went to last time?”
You sigh, wishing it could be that simple. Instead of responding to his invitation, you run through tomorrow’s schedule. “I have another fitting tomorrow afternoon and a meeting after that. Olivier is also hosting a party tomorrow night after the Balmain show, so I don’t know—”
“I can meet you after your last event, just tell me where.”
“You can’t just show up randomly. There’s going to be other designers and stylists. You might feel out of place since you won’t know anybody,” you reason.
“You can always introduce me,” he suggests.
“As what?”
He’s silent for a few beats then says, “Your client?”
You chuckle, feeling a hint of embarrassment due to your presumptions. You've never clarified the nature of your relationship. Since you’re part of his team’s regular stylists, you have to stay professional, especially around staff and his other teammates. Occasionally, when he can steal a quiet moment, he whispers what he'd like to do when he gets you alone.
“Gyu—”
“Please? I miss you,” he pleads quietly.
Apart from the occasional sexy video calls, you haven't seen each other in over a month due to your busy work schedules. As much as you try to convince yourself that you don’t feel the same, hearing the need in his voice makes your chest twinge.
You open your mouth to answer but a knock on the bathroom door startles you. It’s the intern, telling you that your client needs your opinion on shoes.
You sigh, cursing under your breath. “I have to go. Just trust Monica, okay?”
You didn't wait for him to respond before you hung up. You didn't want to hear the disappointment in his voice. You wished you could leave all the work to your staff and head off to dinner with Mingyu, then go to bed with him. But there were too many eyes on Paris this week, especially on him.
This wasn’t like one of your clandestine meetings. He was more recognizable now, which meant photos could be snapped of you and him anywhere. When that happens, it’ll be all over.
After that call, you didn't hear from him for the rest of the night.
********
“So, how did you pick your outfit today?”
The question, posed by one of many journalists in the bustling press line of the fashion show’s venue, brings a warm smile to Mingyu's face.
“This outfit?” He took a moment before responding, his eyes had a hint of nostalgia as he revisited the process that eventually led up to the ensemble he was dressed in.
“Ah, well. My team put it together!” His response elicits laughter from both the photographers and the journalist.
“No, but seriously, I like clean, timeless looks with hints of detail and different textures to keep it interesting. My stylist knows me very well, and she has a great eye.” He finishes with that million-dollar smile of his, leaving the journalist flustered.
“Well,” the journalist says, “Sounds like someone out there deserves a nice bonus.”
“Oh, I agree!” He looks straight into the camera and gives a subtle wink at it right before the clip ends.
You chuckle and shake your head at your phone, swiping away to close out of full-screen mode.
Earlier this morning, he texted you a photo of his final look. He had chosen the blue suit and bejeweled button-down shirt, the ensemble you put together, and hoped he would go for. His choice delighted you, despite how sour your phone call ended last night.
You sent a text to Monica, thanking her for the link to Mingyu's interview clip and complimenting her on her first solo styling job.
She responded, saying that you did 90% of the work. She merely pulled together what made sense, and you approved.
You laugh. She's right, but she would at least get credit in the magazines and fashion blogs where Mingyu's photos would appear.
********
It was well past midnight when you got out of the limo with a couple of colleagues and walked into the hotel lobby, coming back from an after-party when your phone rang. You fish it out of your pocket and drunkenly squint your eyes at the caller ID.
It was Mingyu. You slide across your screen to answer it.
“Hey. Where are you?” His voice was gruff, like he had just woken up or maybe had a few drinks.
“I just got in from Olivier’s party.”
“Mm, how was that?”
“Good. We had fun. Nice way to cap off fashion week.”
He hums in response. “Are you back in your room?”
“Not yet but I’m heading up there soon. What’s up?” You step into the elevator and punch your floor number.
He sighs softly on the other line. “Nothing. Just wanted to make sure that you were back safe.”
“Uh-huh,” you say skeptically.
The elevator dings and stops at your floor. You step out and follow the hallway toward your room. “Why don't you tell me what's really going on?”
As you look ahead, you slow down upon seeing someone leaning against your doorway. How did he even… you stop that thought right away, not wanting to know all the details.
“I was hoping to say goodnight to you,” he says into the phone as you stop in front of him.
You glance at your watch and tell him, “But it’s already 2 in the morning.”
“So, good morning then?” he smirked. Then, his eyes rake you from head to toe. “You look nice.”
Judging by what you recall from your reflection in the elevator's mirror, you knew you were anything but. “Thanks. You look…clean.”
He was showered, barefaced, and dressed in sweats, his hair sticking out in every direction. Now this was the version of Mingyu you were used to seeing in private.
“Can I put you to bed?”
You bit your lip as he moved in closer. The thought was tempting, but you were aware that other staff members were staying on the same floor. But it was also late, and they were likely asleep. Perhaps a little nightcap wouldn't be too bad.
Before you can answer, you freeze when the door across the hall opens. Monica pops her head out, her sleep mask perched atop her head. “Oh, hey guys! I thought I heard voices. What are you doing here?” She directs her question at Mingyu.
“We were just talking,” he tells her with an innocent smile, relieved she didn't see him enter your room.
“Oh. Is everything okay?” She looks worried, assuming that Mingyu is there to tell you that she did an awful job, despite reassuring her that she did great filling in for you.
“All good! He and I just ran into each other in the lobby and started discussing an upcoming shoot,” you say apologetically.
“We'll try to keep it down,” Mingyu adds.
“No worries. I have a white noise machine,” Monica replies with a knowing smile. “You can be as loud as you want.”
Your mouth falls open as she casually turns back into her room and closes the door. 
Mingyu suppresses a laugh. “You think she knows?”
You smack him on the chest and roll your eyes, making him giggle some more.
“You're lucky I pay her well,” you say, reaching into your purse for your key card. You swipe it on the door sensor and step inside while he's still laughing. “Are you coming in or not?”
He laughs even harder, but he follows you right in.
********
“Did you like Monica’s picks?” you call out from the bathroom, as you finish up your skincare routine.
“You mean what you picked?” he retorts.
“I wasn't even there! That was all her.”
“He snorts at your comment. “You think she pulled those pieces all on her own without your sign-off?” He snacks on a few pomme frites that he ordered from room service during your quick shower.
“I've been training her for a couple of years. She deserves some credit,” you reply as you reenter the room in an oversized shirt, walking towards him on the couch, and taking some fries. 
“I mean, she's good, but she doesn't know me that well.” He pauses to watch you settle next to him. “You do, though.”
“Then let her get to know you! Help her out a little.” You suggest, barely looking up from your phone.
“You mean the way I got to know you? Is that what you want?” 
You tense up and purse your lips. However, considering you have no claim on Mingyu, you have no right to feel upset.
“I'm just saying—I can't always be where you need me to be and…you’re free to do what you want.” You clear your throat, attempting to sound nonchalant.
He lets out a sigh, pulling your phone down to get your attention. “Don’t you get it? I don’t want anybody else to get to know me.”
You could hear the yearning in his voice, something you didn’t quite expect.
After years in the industry, you told yourself you’d never get involved with a client. And then Mingyu came along. People were naturally drawn to him, and even you weren’t immune to his charms. He was always sweet, and you assumed he treated everyone who worked for him the same way. It wasn’t until after an overseas photoshoot followed by celebratory drinks with him and his staff, that you let your guard down.
What you initially saw as a one-time slip-up gradually became a series of encounters, each growing more intimate than the last. But you couldn’t stay in that mindset. You couldn’t get your hopes up, especially with someone as famous as he was. Not only was it bad for business but it was bad for you.
“I’m not playing games.”
“Neither am I.” He says evenly. “The fact is, I want you and I’m tired of sharing you with other people.”
You scoff at his audacious remark. “Look, it’s my job—”
He shakes his head and interjects. “You know what I mean. I want to make things official…with you. Just you.”
You sigh. “You know that we can’t.” Even though everything in you wants to scream yes.
“You can’t or won’t?”
“I know that you can't,” you counter. He's just too... public. Not only are you concerned about your reputation, but you're mostly worried about the backlash if his fans ever find out about you and him. The stakes are higher for him.
“That’s not true. It’s not like I’m a prisoner.” 
You chuckle humorlessly, as if he doesn’t see how this won’t end well for either of you. “I know how this business works, okay?”
“You think I don’t know that either? I just want us to try. I feel that there’s something more between us. And I know you feel it, too.” He reaches out and rests his hand on your bare knee.
Your skin tingles with the warmth of his touch. It’s been too long since you last felt it, and you’re ashamed to admit how much you missed it. Craved it, even.
You stare at his hand, now snaking past the hem of your shirt. “There are a million reasons why we shouldn’t do this.”
“Then let’s do it for the reasons that we should,” he retorts, lifting your chin to meet his gaze. You quickly realize that was a big mistake.
His eyes quietly pleaded, causing the knot in your stomach to tighten. Things weren't going to be easy. A million questions swirled in your head, but he quieted all except one as his face drew closer.
“How would we even do this?” You ask softly.
“Let me worry about that. I just need you to tell me that you want the same thing.”
Your hand lifts to his neck, fingers grazing his jawline, then up his cheek. He sighs softly, melting under your touch.
After a few beats, you cock an eyebrow at him. “You know, part of me feels like I’m letting you off easy. Maybe I should let you work for it a little?”
A smile ghosted his lips. He lowered his head, his voice deep and sexy. “I’ll work for it now.”
Even though you see the kiss coming, it still knocks you out. Mingyu’s lips meet yours, his tongue stroking greedily into your mouth. “C’mere,” he says roughly before urging you onto his lap.
Your phone rings, but you silence it quickly before chucking it, not caring where it lands. You tangle your fingers in Mingyu's hair, holding his head while you kiss him ardently. God, you love kissing him. The feel of his lips and the rough sounds of pleasure he makes are music to your ears. He’s ravenous for you, just as you are for him. He catches one of your wrists and pulls your hand over his chest, pressing it flat so you can feel his heart pounding.
“This all you,” he breathes against your mouth.
And with that, your walls come down. You’re done for.
You tear at each other’s clothing, yanking off each other’s shirts. You’re desperate to feel him, your lips and teeth catching every inch of his golden skin. At this point, you don’t care if other staff hear you throughout this floor.
He urges you backward until you feel the armrest of the couch behind you. Kissing you deeply, he cups one of your breasts in his hand, kneading it before pushing the bra cup down to touch your bare skin.
You fumble with the drawstring of his pants, whilst palming him through the material, feeling how hard he already is. You growl in frustration when he pulls your hands away.
He shakes his head and tuts. “You first.” Clever fingers circle your nipple and roll it, sending shocks of delight straight to your core.
The next moment, that mouth you love to kiss is on your breast, surrounding your tender nipple. His tongue flicks at the tip, his cheeks hollowing as he sucks. His other hand is between your legs, rubbing your aching cleft through your panties, teasing you even more by grinding his length against your thigh.
His scent surrounds you, just as his hands and mouth are all over you. You want some control, but he’s too strong, too quick, sliding lower before you can catch him.
He keeps his gaze on you as he tugs your panties down your legs. Your center clenches at how much that turns you on.
You sit up slightly to unclasp your bra, tossing it while Mingyu scoots back, lifting his hips to shove his sweats and boxer briefs out of the way. 
In an instant, he’s on you again–too impatient to strip all the way naked. He pins your hips down, urging your thighs further apart while he lines himself up to your center, and slowly pushes in. Lowering his head, he groans right in your ear, feeling how tight you are for him. 
You pant as he burrows deeper. Your nails dig into his back and your legs tighten around his waist. You’re wetter by the moment, rendered helpless by the way his hips move, his body mindlessly seeking a deeper connection to yours.
You gasp when he slides in deeper, your hips fighting his hold, needing to arch upward.
“Fuck, you feel so good,” he moans, pulling back an inch and thrusting again.
He pulls out abruptly, leaving you empty and aching, but not for long. His mouth is there between your legs, licking, sucking on your clit, and fluttering over the bundle of nerves. Your hands fist at the cushions, eyes rolling to the back of your head. You went from zero to sixty so fast that your orgasm takes you by surprise.
“Oh, fuck,” you breathe out.
Shivers of pleasure course through you as you suck in air. He keeps your legs spread wide with his shoulders, holding you in place, as he slips two fingers inside.  He moves them in and out slowly, circling your clit in between. He teases you a few more times, edging you, making you desperate for his cock.
The instant he shifts to slide over you again, you seize the moment to push him to the other end of the couch. He doesn’t put up a fight as you move to straddle his hips. He simply leans back, his eyes wide, cheeks flushed from arousal, waiting for your next move.
You reach for his cock under you, fisting it slowly. He fights to keep his eyes open but the pleasure you give him feels too good. His chest heaves and he lets out a drawn-out groan. 
Fuck, he was hot. And the way his hands grip your hips tightly as you position him to your center drives you insane with the need to ride him hard.
You slide the tip between your folds, coating him with your slick before your hips sink in one swift move. Your mouths fall open when your ass hits the tops of his thighs, both of you relishing in the sensation. You rest your hands on his shoulders for leverage and roll your hips toward him slowly. His neck arches, letting out a groan of pleasure between clenched teeth.
His hands reach up to cup your breasts, palming them, and pinching your nipples, making you hiss at the perfect combination of pain and pleasure. “Ah…Mingyu...fuck, yes…”
Once you find your rhythm, he thrusts upward, meeting your hips. You push your fingers into his hair, cupping the back of his head to hold him close.
He nuzzles against your temple. “You want this?”
Your nodding wasn’t enough for him.
“Say it.”
So you say it loud and clear for him. “Yes, I want this. I want you.” 
With a shift of his hips, the tip of his cock notches into your opening. Pressure builds as he fucks into you. Slow, easy thrusts that work him into you with every lunge. Your entire body tenses, as he sinks deep into your core. You feel yourself inch closer and closer to your climax.
Your grip on him tightens, and you grind your hips, matching his every move to direct him into where it feels good.
“Kiss me,” you gasp.
Soon after his mouth makes contact with yours, your body surrenders to him. Tears sting your eyes when the tension in you breaks, and you come harder than you did the first time.
The pulsing only deepens as Mingyu continues to pound into you, chasing his own climax. His teeth sink into your shoulder as he finally reaches it, tethering his orgasm to yours.
It's one of the most intense sensations you've ever felt. Despite your body's natural instinct to pull away, your mind resists. The steady thrum of your heartbeat soothes you, and you stay there, quietly relishing the comfort in each other's arms.
********
Reluctantly, you take a second shower, with him doing most of the work cleaning you up. Afterwards, you crawl into bed. You watch him, carefully tucking you in, mildly annoyed that he can move and think clearly while you're still stuck in a post-orgasmic haze.
When he finally flops into bed beside you, you turn to face him. “How are you still moving around?”
He props his head in his hand and grins, his fingers running lightly down your cleavage. “Did you forget the ten minutes it took me to get up?”
“I’m making sure you’re down for the count next time,” you pout playfully.
“Hmm...” Leaning over you, he presses his lips to yours. “I’m just happy there’s a next time.”
You nod, a smile tugging at the corners of your mouth. “Lots of next times.”
Reaching up, you brush his hair back from his forehead. His post-sex look is even more breathtaking. His face is softer, his eyes are brighter, and that smile… you sigh deeply. He looks so happy that it twists your heart to think that you had a hand in that without even really trying. Yet, this also worries you, knowing it would be devastating if that smile ever faded.
“I’m scared, you know,” you confess.
He lifts your hand and presses his lips to it. A few moments of silence pass before he replies, “Yeah. Me too.” You don’t even want to think about how the staff will react when they see him walk out of your room in a few hours.
His facial expression tenses, and you immediately regret bringing it up. You pull him closer, holding him tightly as a silent apology.
“Can we agree not to bring anything but us into bed?” he murmurs, running his nose along your cheek before pulling away slightly to look at you. “I just want us to have some place where nothing else matters but you and me.”
“Okay.” You nod, your hands stroking up and down his back. Burying your face in his chest, you breathe in, letting the familiar scent of his skin ground you in the moment.
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russellsppttemplates · 4 months
Text
A little hope (Lando Norris) (Part 1)
Lando will give you all the time you need if it means you will work things out
Note: english is not my first language. I don't think I've ever written a piece without closure/closing off the subject like this, so constructive thoughts are appreciated... might do a part two depending on how this one goes, let me know your thoughts on it! ✨️
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
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Tw: mentions a couple's fight, self-deprecation moments, body image insecurity, signs and symptoms of anxiety
Tag list: @myloverjk-blog
"Here, gorgeous", Lando said as he opened the door for you, letting you in first and following suit, finding your places around the table as the meeting was about to start.
"Thanks, love", you whispered as you set your things down on the table, turning on your laptop as you gathered everything you needed to show them.
"Whatever you want to do, we'll do", Lando noted a while into the meeting already. He didn't know that much about graphic design, so if his graphic designer said they should do it, they were going to.
The frown on your face, however, didn't seem to agree, "I spoke to the marketing guys, as well", you looked at Anna as she nodded, "and they think this is also the best strategy if we want to expand it to this market", you clarified.
"Then that's how it's going to go, Y/N", Callum asserted, noticing your slightly antsy posture as you moved on to the next point of discussion.
This had been happening for a while, the thoughts plaguing you with the fact that, in the simples of terms, you worked for your boyfriend. While the relationship had nothing to do with how you got the job and position, and inside the team, no one seemed too phased by it, part of you wondered if you were taken differently because of your relationship.
"Alright, Y/N?", Tara said, calling you back to planet Earth, "yes, sorry. But I agree with that, yes, but could we do this earlier, maybe this week? It would match up with all the dates we have", you answered, earning everyone's approval as they booked the shoot for Friday.
A knock on the door startled you as a woman peeked, "I'm sorry, I'm looking for Anna? From Marketing?", she asked, looking at you, "are you her?", she pointed her finger to you.
"She's my girlfriend, Y/N, she's our graphic designer", Lando said with a big smile.
"That's Anna", you said as the ginger haired girl raised her hand, "I'm Y/N", you murmured the last part.
The uneasiness took over your body again when you noticed the woman's look directed at you, a mixture of a silent scoff and a despised expression.
"Do you need a ride home, baby?", Lando asked once the meeting ended, "I have to go somewhere before going home, but thanks anyway", you said, kissing his lips chastely and bidding goodbye to everyone.
"Is she alright? She seemed off today", Max commented as he saw your interaction with his bestfriend, "this project had been taking a lot out of her, she's been tired, that's all", he said as he looked at your back as you walked away from them, "at least I hope it's that".
Only it really wasn't that, and with your calendar and Lando's calendar, you only saw eachother again on the day of the shoot.
The fight you had the day before still resonated with you and Lando, each of you measuring your words and how you had behaved.
"In Quadrant, you are my superior and I respect that", you pointed between you two, "but I'm my own person and if there's something I say, I want to be heard as me, Y/N, graphic designer for Quadrant", you cleared, "And in the meetings, if I give an idea, I want it to be heard and seen as coming from a graphic designer with experience and knowledge, not your girlfriend who you're afraid will get hurt if you say no and always let me get my way", you explained.
"But who said that I don't respect you like that? Because I do! I've considered every idea you've said like I'd consider them if somebody else said them!", Lando attempted, "do you think my love for you is not genuine? Do you think my appreciation for you or how much I value, as a person and as a member of the team, depends on what? What do you think this is?", Lando snapped, looking angrier than you've ever seen him. He usually kept a calm stance no matter how stressful the situation was, so the slight raise in his and his tone was enough to show he wasn't his usual self.
"Is it my fault you are my girlfriend? Are we putting this relationship, our relationship, in a basket of cons for us and for our lives?", he sounded genuinely hurt at his admission.
You didn't mean it that way, and you knew he knew that, but the fact that his mind went there and considered it enough for him to say it out loud hurt you.
Despite Tara's insistence that you could be one of the models for the hoodie she claimed was made for you, you declined the invitation, feeling that it would only add to your self deprecation and the very few comments you had seen online about how "dating Lando has landed you a great gig when so many people are looking for jobs themselves". You weren't also in the best terms with your boyfriend, and since he was modelling too, it would hardly be a good idea to be so close to eachother whilst still working in front of the team.
"We printed the backdrop you sent us, Y/N!", the photographer, James, and his colleague, Kai, called for you as you went to inspect the piece. It wasn't greatly detailed, but had certain points already measured so the editing and designing would be easier for you once you go the pictures back from them.
"I've never done it like this myself, but a friend of mine from university has done this before and he said it was so much easier and the models can move freely as long as they're within the frame", you explained, sharing knowledge in case they ever found themselves with a similar issue in need of this solution.
So absorbed in the conversation about different techniques and the words they had done before, you missed Lando arriving to the studio along with Max who had started making sure everything was running as scheduled.
"First, it's model two and three", you said as you looked at the schedule Max held, "so that's...", you trailed off, looking again in the list to make sure you were calling the right names, "Lucy and Lando", you stated, looking around for them and seeing the boy laugh at something she had said.
"Guys!", Max yelled, "it's your turn", he whistled, grabbing their attention so they could get in position.
James kept telling them what worked best as Kai worked with the lights, carefully readjusting and pointing out whenever they weren't on the frame you had specified.
"Now it's just the male models", Kai said as Lucy stepped down.
"I'm sorry to bother, but do you think we can bring out the snack table around now?", she questioned as she clipped her hair back, not wanting to mess with the work that was done on the short blonde locks, "I woke up later than I wanted and I had to rush here so I didn't have much for breakfast", she cringed.
"I think we can, yes. There's coffee in there, too, so I might join you", you smiled, walking alongside her to the table the catering team had set up. You were planning to spend the whole morning in there, so food and drinks were ordered to keep everyone happy and content.
"Rough night?", Lucy asked as she say you make a triple latte from the expresso machine.
That would be a way to put it, you thought. You hated leaving things unresolved with anyone, but knowing you and Lando went to sleep without knowing where you stood, it was hard for you to close your eyes and fall asleep despite the tiredness you felt. You rolled in your bed countless times, changing the pyjamas you were wearing three times until you accepted that the choice of clothing wasn't what was keeping you from falling asleep. In total, you probably slept four hours, and you were hoping the coffee would help with that.
"I remember when me and Lando used to go out, there was this week where it was four nights!", she smiled, stirring the hot tea in her cup as she took one of the small sandwiches.
"You and Lando used to go out? I didn't realise", you asked, the curiosity killing you and the dread to know the answer even more.
"I mean going out as in out of the house and into clubs, parties and such", she laughed brightly, and even that didn't seem to settle your heart, "we found out we have mutual friends that work for the same chain of clubs. We never slapped a label on it, I think neither of us wanted the attachment or rules you had to follow, you know? He's always wanted to be free on his endeavours and do as he pleases".
"Sure", you gulped, drinking the hot coffee as you thought about her words, not going to far, probably for your own good, since you heard something fall, "I better go see what that is, excuse me", you smiled lightly.
As it turned out, there was a piece of metal holding the backdrop that had a smaller piece holding it together that wasn't the right size, "we have to tools in there, let me just change it quickly", you said, "you guys can go and grab a coffee and some snacks, they're really good", you offered, "I'll sort out the programming for the next set while I'm at it, too".
Carrying the piece to the room where you kept the tools, you turned on your laptop and ran the code, fixing the metal piece in the mean time when you heard someone walk in the room, "was the coffee that bad? I- Oh, hi", you muttered, seeing Lando walk in and sit in front of you as you worked on the table.
"Can we talk, please?", Lando wondered. Even though he was clearly tired and his usual bright eyes had required the makeup artist to apply eye drops on him twice already, he still looked as handsome as ever. His curls was bouncy and the green coloured hoodie was a perfect match against his tanned skin and the minimal jewellery he had on.
"Sure", you asked, setting the screwdriver down and looking at him.
"I want to apoligise if I made you feel unworthy, professionally and personally. It was never my intention, Y/N. I want to be there for you, and I want to protect you and help make sure nothing bad happens, okay? I'd hate to be the reason you feel bad, baby.
"But I also need you to tell me what's wrong, because I know something is bothering you and I don't care who I have to call or what I have to do to help, but you need to tell me", he stated.
Your eyes started to feel tight and threatened to spill tears you were sure had been building up for more than a week, "I'm a confident woman, I know what I'm worth", you reasoned, "growing up left from what society thinks women should behave and look like, I've had to grow thick skin and be confident in what I do. It's not that you've had other partners or flings before, it's the way I'm being labelled as your girlfriend. Suddenly, I lost my name, my identity and I'm something to someone, that's what people see.
"I love you, and I love being with you. I've had so many opportunities that I wouldn't have had in other jobs and in other relationships, but I'm not sure losing who I am is a fair price to pay", you added. "I need to think this through. I'm not in the right state to argue this and risk saying something I don't mean and hurt you in the process. I don't want to hurt you, Lando, and I don't won't to be hurt either, I'm sorry", you sighed, looking into his colourful eyes.
"I love you, Y/N, so much", he said as he took a step forward, testing the waters and not getting resistance from you which led him to press his lips on your forehead, depositing a slow and soft kiss there, "I don't want to hurt you either, but... Think about it, okay? Really give it some thought because there's a way and we will find it", he attempted, realising it wasn't his place to tell you how you should feel about something and finding a common ground.
"Sorry to interrupt, guys, but we need your opinion on something, Y/N", Kai asked, sympathetically smiling as you excused yourself from the room and back to the studio area.
Lando went outside to cool off a little, thinking about your discussion and taking the opportunity that he wasn't needed inside for a while.
Had he been a pushover? Was that how you felt? You hadn't been yourself in the past two weeks, but he had put it down to the fact that you had been to the race with him and then Quadrant had this project that you wanted to see through from begging to end and it was on a tight schedule. You wouldn't be persuaded to take it easy, so Lando did his best to make sure you were as well as possible, but he seemed to have failed.
"I don't know how long it will be before they notice I'm gone and need help, so I'm advising you to spit it out while you can", Max jumped in, sitting on the floor and against the wall next to him.
"Just tired, didn't sleep well", Lando muttered. He didn't sleep at all, truth be told, images of your shattered expression kept replaying in his head as he tried to figure out what was happening to you two.
"I suggest you tell me the truth", Max squinted, "so, try again".
"Y/N and I have hit a rough patch? Our first big fight? I'm not sure", he admitted, "she isn't telling me much, but I think it's about the fact that she works for Quadrant, as in the company I, her boyfriend, own and something about treating her like and employee and not my girlfriend", Lando let out, starting to get worked up, "she tells me this, and I've kept my distance, and that's not been good either. Didn't she say that I should treat her like the employee she is?", Lando snapped as his body language showed another set of emotions.
"She is an employee, yes, and she deserves to be treated as such. But she's also the person you come home to, she was someone before she met you, she is a person outside of your relationship and you shouldn't meddle things. You know that dating you isn't easy and she's been getting the backhand of it", Max reasoned as Lando listened intently, "the social media team have been taking care of it, but there have been comments that are less than kind about her on Instagram, the email marketing too...! It's shitty, less than reasonable accusations, but it has been there... Y/N has never liked to be discredited, and I'm not saying you do it per se, but maybe it's where you should go first", he tapped his friend's back.
"She's not letting me in, how am I supposed to know?!", Lando got antsy again, feet tapping the ground incessantly as his breath got quicker and shallower as he struggled to focus a little.
"Is this rage you feel? Anger?", Max checked, handing Lando the ice-cold water bottle so he could focus on the temperature and not spiral out, "you're good, mate? What do you feel?".
"It's fear that I might lose her", Lando said as he allowed himself to cry, "I'm afraid of losing her because of something I did to her unintentionally. Because being my girlfriend is bad for her and I can't be selfish and tell her to be with me when she's suffering. Because I can't help that I'm proud of her and I won't to belt out how proud I am of her work and that I have her?", he let it all out.
"Have you thought about how it feels for her, though? Even for you, there are comments left and right about how you got to where you are, so imagine how it is for her", Max thought out loud, letting it all sink in.
By the time they came back to the studio, the models were gone and, by the looks of it, so were you as they tidied the place.
"Lando, Max", James called, "we're just finishing up and then we'll also get going. Y/N had to leave, she said something about her mother calling her and she needed to go. Didn't look life threateningly urgent, but she had to get going. Also- Lucy, I think her name was -, she left her number here for you", the photographer said, "she asked me to make sure I handed it to you", he smiled, "do you need mine too? I'm assuming it's for the contract payments?".
"Yes, there was a mishap with her contract, but we checked and yours are still there, no worries with that", Lando lied, impressed at his ability to come up with a half decent excuse.
Walking up to his car, Lando threw the card James gave him in one of the bins outside before getting in with Max, "let me just send this text, one minute".
To lovie ✨️
I'll give you all of the time that you need, but I'm not leaving this, I'm not leaving us. You're the love of my life and I'll wait as long as you need me to, so whenever you want to talk, I'm here, baby.
I love you to the moon and the stars 🤍
"I'll be damned if lose her, Max", Lando admitted, resting his elbows on the steering wheel and supporting his head on his hands.
"You two were made for eachother, Lando. You'll figure it out", his best friend comforted.
As he was reversing out of the parking space, his phone beeped with a notification.
From lovie ✨️
Thank you for letting me do that, I appreciate it more than words can say.
I love you to the planets and around the Milky Way.
For now, it brought a smile to his face, and a little hope. And he would hold on to that little hope.
Part 2
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veilkeeper · 5 months
Text
thoughts on the astarion-halsin polymance
i know some people dont like the halsin polymance specifically if the PC's other partner is astarion but. i want to talk about it. because i think maybe a lot of people have come to conclusions without seeing the scenes in question for themselves. so let me give a different perspective.
disclaimers: *i know a lot of people ship/hc this polymance as a triad, but for the purposes of this post i'm talking specifically about the "hinge" dynamic we see in-game thx. **also i got the halsin romance trigger before completing astarion's personal quest, so this post is talking about that perspective, and all quotes are from those conversations. ***i respect people who dont play this route. you're allowed to play this game however you want. the purpose of this post is to discuss the canon, in-game text and how it supports the astarion-halsin polymance as a viable and healthy path for these relationships, with nuance and respect to astarion's personal issues. this is not meant to convert anyone, but it is meant to clarify and provide additional context that i feel is largely missing from a lot of discussions about how the polymance is "bad", unilaterally.
let's start with halsin, because i think he's the easier perspective to tease out here, given that he really leaves nothing to the imagination. he's incredibly earnest and open, and will happily describe his perspective on non-monogamy right out the gate. as he says...
The wolf mates for life, but the bear roams free and partners as its instinct dictates. I need to stay true to my nature, and you to yours.
now, to get ahead of potential backlash here... if you haven't spent a lot of time with halsin, particularly if you've never flirted with him, that line may imply that he's a "player". he is not. given the context of the PCs interactions with him up to this point (and how he treats the relationship after, if you confirm the romance), halsin is deeply devoted, and has really strong feelings for the PC. it's really sweet, i highly recommend romancing him, either as a polymance or solo.
what he's describing here is a perspective of cultural non-monogamy. that he believes his feelings are not diminished by having multiple relationships at the same time, and he expects that if the PC agrees to a relationship with him that they will respect his freedom to pursue others when/if such feelings arise, just as he will respect the PC's freedom to continue and/or pursue other relationships as well. it's a really succinct and frankly unexpectedly respectful negotiation of the terms of a polyam relationship.
and that respect is evident from the get go. if you've never seen this conversation, it basically opens with him saying "hey, i have these feelings about you, i was wondering if you maybe felt the same," and if the PC says that they do, he immediately acknowledges the existing relationship and tells the PC that they can't move forward without consent. and you cant; speaking to halsin again just has him ask the PC if they've spoken to their other partner yet. at every turn, halsin is incredibly respectful of the PCs other partner, he never diminishes that relationship, nor does he expect the PC to ever place him above that relationship. he even says:
Indeed, I am but one of your lovers. You and I should seek happiness, wherever it lies. You are all I want, but I will not hoard you to myself.
he makes it very clear from the get-go that he has no designs on the PC's other relationship and that he is more than happy to take whatever they want to give him.
which leads me to my overarching point: astarion is consenting to this dynamic specifically because the other person in question is halsin.
and we know this for a few reasons. first, because.... mechanically in game, he's the only person you can romance at the same time as astarion. while astarion mentions at various points that he is fine with "arrangements", generally speaking, every other potential romance partner results in a "you have to choose one of us" conversation. the reason astarion gives for why the PC has to choose varies, i believe, but since i don't have the dialogue on hand (i have been faithful as hell in my playthrough) i won't speculate about those conversations.
however, we also know that astarion is consenting to an arrangement with halsin specifically because of this line:
The druid is unique. He has a lot of experience with this type of arrangement. Thus, I'm sure it would be quite a harmless affair.
which is interesting, isn't it? hold onto this one, we'll circle back to it later. and then of course, the other line we need to discuss from astarion here is the famously controversial...
It's not because… you know… we haven't… in a while?
so this is where i get into the potentially controversial take that i have, because it's more nuanced than arguments i've seen on either side of the pro-/anti- polymance debate. but basically i think that astarion is... insecure. shocker, i know. but unlike some takes i've seen, i dont think this means he can't consent to a polyam relationship, i think it means that he has certain Conditions related to it, that he has decided have been met. and i think those conditions are as follows:
the PC's interest in halsin is not borne out of any deficiency of astarion's.
this is why he asks the famous question. he's insecure, and making sure that the PC's interest in halsin is not because astarion is failing to "satisfy" them, that it's not because he isn't enough. astarion has a lot of self-worth issues that he tries really hard to hide, and i think it would be easy for him to think that the PC starting another relationship could be a result of him being... insufficient.
for people who have never been in a polyam relationship, this is a thing. this is an important thing, and making sure all of your partners feel that they're valued and "enough" is an important part of navigating these relationships. astarion does the right thing here, by expressing his insecurity and asking for reassurance. and when the PC gives it to him, the relief is evident and he gives consent to the dynamic immediately. not because he's been coerced, but because he's been reassured.
PC: Gods, I don't want you to think that for a moment. Astarion: I know I was being foolish. But thank you for saying it.
the second condition is:
that he is still a priority
this is pretty self explanatory but since it's sort of the clincher for my whole argument here, i do have to say the quiet part out loud. i dont think what astarion wants or needs is to be the PC's only partner. he talks about "arrangements" on multiple occasions, i dont think he has a problem with sharing. what i do think he wants is to be the PC's primary partner. what he's consenting to, in my view, is hierarchical polyamory, to use the proper term. as in, the PC can fool around with whoever they want, even have feelings for other people, so long as they always come back to astarion. he needs to feel like he is secure and valued above others as he values them above others. he needs to feel like the PC isn't going anywhere.
and that's why he consents to an arrangement with halsin, but no one else. because all of the other romance options, the origin companions, would want to be equal with astarion, they would want non-hierarchical polyamory. halsin, on the other hand, is all about taking what can be given and having a more fluid understanding of relationships. he doesn't care if he's #1, he cares that the PC cares about him, right now. no formal definitions or obligations required.
that's what astarion means when he says "the druid is unique." that's what he means when he says "he has a lot of experience with this type of arrangement." that's what he means when he says it will be a "harmless affair." because he knows halsin is never going to try to take the PC away from him. he knows halsin isn't going to be a threat to him and his status with his partner. and that's why he's comfortable saying yes, even though he says no to every other possible arrangement.
it's not because he was coerced. it's not because he doesn't know how to say no. it's because he feels safe. and that's what we want.
some additional notes while i'm here...
on jealousy: a lot of people hc astarion as the jealous type, as perhaps a little possessive, and i am also one of those people. it makes sense; he's a guy who hasn't had anything in 200 years, and the PC is the first person he's cared about like this. i can definitely see him being a little possessive and prone to jealousy. but stepping outside of the realm of fiction, jealous/possessive feelings are often the result of insecurity and in real relationships should absolutely not be used as a tool to control the behaviour of another partner. and, crucially, jealous/possessive feelings are a thing to be talked about and worked through, not tip-toed around. the presence of those feelings does not automatically mean that a polyamorous relationship is impossible, it just means there's another thing to talk about, and by astarion consenting to the PC having another relationship, he's pretty clearly saying he's willing to talk through those feelings and work on them.
on the ability to consent: i know that astarion doesn't talk about his feelings enough. but i truly dont think that this is a case of astarion saying yes when he means no. astarion can say no, even in high pressure situations he wasn't expecting. he says no to the astral-touched tadpole (rather firmly, i might add), he says no to sleeping with the drow twins, etc. the scene that most people use as proof that astarion cannot consent happens in a much different emotional context, with a lot of direct coercion, and is followed by astarion taking back personal control and dumping the PC. that is not what happens in this scene, when astarion is consenting to a polyamorous relationship. there is no coercion (in fact the PC can explicitly say "i wouldn't even consider it if it bothered you", and astarion expected the conversation, so he would have been able to prepare his thoughts and feelings ahead of time. at no point does he say no or even imply he's not okay with an arrangement with halsin.
on timing: ive seen some people say that they would be more okay with the astarion-halsin polymance if all of this was not be happening right now. i agree with that. ideally, astarion would have more time to adjust to his relationship before it was opened up at all. but because this is a video game, everything is happening during the events of the game. and because this is a video game, the events of the game are high pressure and wild and everything is happening all at once. i don't blame people who elongate the timeline in fan content, or who turn down halsin because they think its "too soon." thats actually very explicitly something halsin says when he initially propositions the player - that he hopes it isn't "too soon." however, astarion still consents (see point above), and relationships barely ever have good timing. one could argue that even the solomance with astarion does not have good timing, when considering astarion's trauma and recovery. so. we make do. and i think it would be... a disservice? to what is (in my opinion) really good polyam writing to just say "actually it's all terrible and icky because there's a lot going on right now" and dismiss it out of hand.
.......................and i think that's everything. thank you for joining me on this very long (oops) deep dive into this. a double thank you for reading all the way through if you don't like the astarion-halsin polymance. i hope i gave you a different perspective, even if i didn't change your mind. love ya <3
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wonwins · 3 months
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megumi fushiguro x reader - non sorcerer!au
you're tired from school and your amazing boyfriend knows how to brighten your mood
cw: very soft megumi, fluffy, little kisses
wc: 602
author's note ~ first fic here hehe just a short one to start :) please please give me suggestions on what to write i wanna write sm. also this fic is basically just me writing about what i want rn :((
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
14:49. you felt your vision crossing as you tried to keep your eyes open. just 11 more minutes till school was over. you sighed, even after that you couldn't go home and sleep. you still had some homework to do.
you straitened your posture in your chair, you couldn't let others see your exhaustion. you were supposed to be a role model in the class. sometimes, you really wished you weren't the class president.
the bell rang taking you out of a trance you didn't realize you were in. was i sleeping with my eyes open? you quickly packed up your things before having a quick talk with your teacher about plans for tomorrow’s class and if there were anything you needed to prepare. unfortunately, there was.
you felt your feet drag you out of the school, at snail pace. a hand grasped your shoulder stopping you in your spot. you knew who it was before you even turned around already leaning into their presence. “hi, ‘gumi” you smiled lightly.
“hi. you look tired.” megumi, your amazing but brutally honest boyfriend, said.
“i look that bad, huh?” you raised a brow almost daring him to continue.
“no, no, that's not what i meant!” he clarified, albeit slightly panicked. “you look like you could use a nap or coffee though…”
“both.” you whined, continuing your trudge out of the school.
“okay, let's go get coffee and a snack.” he smiled, taking your hand in his, leading the way.
your smile grew. you knew megumi wasn't the biggest person on pda (even if it was just hand holding) but you knew megumi was very attentive to your needs and knew in moments when you were overworked and exhausted…a little hand holding was what you needed.
the hand holding alone almost boosted your mood as you walked beside him.
you chatted lightly about each other’s day as you made your way to the coffee shop. what made you and megumi’s relationship so special was you both understood the value of talking to each other animatedly but as well quietly appreciating the small moments like this.
after you arrived, you ordered your drinks and food. megumi payed (well technically gojo did but so what), as you sat on a bench under a tree in the park across the street. shortly after megumi came over with the stuff. “thank you, love.” you breathed in the smell of the delicious roast.
after a couple minutes of you quietly drinking your drink, megumi said suddenly, “i love you.” you glanced at him in slight shock.
“what has gotten into you lately?” you asked with a chuckle, “i love you too, but that was random.”
“do i need a reason to say i love you?”
“well no but-”
“but what?” he leaned in closer. you turned your head blushing slightly. even after all this time, you still felt like you had a crush on him. he kissed the side of your head as he tucked you into his side. “you work too hard, yn. i worry sometimes and i want to make sure you know i'm here. just say the word.”
“oh, ‘gumi.” you felt tears treating to rise. “i know, thank you. you are amazing. how did i get so lucky?”
“i'm the lucky one.” he looked at you with his beautiful eyes and you couldn't help but lean in and give him a light kiss.
“you’re so cute.” you saw him blush making you giggle. suddenly you felt wide awake. if being class president somehow led you to moments like this, then you guess it's not too bad.
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sh0tanzz · 3 months
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Who do you think would be the mtl jealous bf in riize?
OMGG ive been waiting for an ask like this 😭
MTL JEALOUS BF IN RIIZE based on astrology ~
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(reminder that this for fun and astrology is something I study for a hobby, these are all inferences based off of observations and not exact fact unless I knew them myself !!)
Most
Sungchan - Tbsh his jealousy would be pretty overboard and extremely obvious like a blaring red signal. He would NOT play about you. His cancer moon makes him pretty sensitive and obvious with his emotions so if he felt jealous he'd get in his feelings or even sulk/ruminate as well as he'd take it pretty personal and have a hard time letting go. His leo venus makes him pretty dramatic 😭. This venus paired with his moon might make him cause a scene or "act out" . His venus+moon leads to him wanting your care and attention on him and him alone. His cap mars screams possessiveness and being restrictive, he'd get so possessive do not let him see you laugh at another guys jokes or be helpful to another guy he'd be FUMING .
Wonbin - I honestly wasn't going to rank Wonbin this high but then I remembered his taurus mars paired with venus square pluto and pluto conjunct lilith so...here we are LMFAOO. From my own personal observations taurus mars is way more possessive in comparison to taurus venus; those pluto/venus/lilith aspects paired with his mars can make his jealousy take a snowball effect leading to an emotional avalanche. Plus a power imbalance fueling the jealousy even more and leading to him being restrictive. However, I ranked him below Sungchan because Sungchan would be VERY petty and loud about his jealousy while Wonbin would most likely silently seethe (due to his pisces sun, aquarius mercury) until he ultimately can't handle holding back, but until then his jealousy would still be DEEP.
Shotaro - His scorpio moon+capricorn venus makes him take the relationship pretty seriously. He craves stability and honesty and once he feels like his jealousy is compromising the security and trust in the relationship he must act ! He won't be too quick to jump into conclusions because of his libra mars, he'd probably think things through before asking/acting on his jealousy..and he might front and pretend he's only a tiny bit jealous/concerned when really it's weighing heavy on his heart in the beginning. When he is jealous he'd be more quiet and less jovial than he usually is. He'd be pretty straight up and might even just ask/tell you about how he's feeling. When things are clarified things will be cool again and he'll go back to being your sweet taro and hopefully stop staring daggers into the random guy talking to you while smiling.
Anton - Very unserious, would text "what position he got you in" and move on with his day. KIDDDING kind of 😭 He'd have short phases of possessiveness due to his taurus venus. His moon square saturn and venus square neptune can lead to slight paranoia and being unable to naturally express his insecurities which could be the source of the jealousy. Despite these things he wouldn't express his jealousy in toxic or overboard ways, he'd probably express his jealousy through jokes or non seriousness hoping you would pick up on it (you probably would with that mercury aries, straight to the point) If he ever did tell you straight up he wouldn't be too harsh he'd just want to be honest and being reassured will patch everything right up.
Sohee - I ranked Sohee this low because honestly when reading his chart I feel like his jealousy would, similarly to Anton's, be quick to come and go. He'd be quick to say something or show that he's uncomfortable. He wouldn't sit you down to have a serious convo about it, but it would have to just passively come out in conversation . As soon as he felt reassured then he'd be fine once again. Now if it was an ongoing issue of scenarios that led to him being jealous then he'd have a more serious even messy approach (his mars square pluto) his temper would awaken. But outside of that he trusts you, even if he doesn't trust and is suspicious of the guys around you he trusts YOUUU at the very end.
Seunghan - Oh the lovely boyfriend that just wants to keep the peace. He wouldn't want you to hound him out of jealousy so he ofc wouldn't do that to you either. If he was jealous he'd be more emotional rather than being petty+aggressive. His mercury is exalted in virgo so he'd definitely want to talk about it or at least let you know how he feels. Outside of that I think he'd want to avoid such a thing in the first place. He'd trust you as best as he can and wouldn't want there to be an imbalance in the relationship to where one of you are restricting the other due to deep seated jealousy (thanks to his libra sun+venus and sag moon). He quite literally just wants you two to be happy and knows that genuine jealousy can poison such a good thing.
Eunseok - I'm sorry fellow briize but this man is quite literally the least of your concern. His aries venus wouldn't want to make things too serious and ominous with jealousy (plus because he values his freedom so in his mind you must value yours too right ?) His sag mars paired with it means he doesn't want to dwell with thoughts of you possibly giving your attention to other guys. He basically has a nonchalant "she knows where home is" mentality lowkey. Plus if he ever did feel jealous he'd probably not say anything because his cap moon+pisces mercury would barely let him properly express it (with words at least). Also weirdly enough he'd be more jealous if you weren't in a relationship compared to if you guys were; once you two are officially together he wouldn't be as jealous anymore .
Least
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lolomidi · 3 months
Text
The Price of Entertainment: An Episode-By-Episode Analysis of Alastor's Facade
I don’t think any character in Hazbin Hotel has been discussed as much as Alastor, and it’s a testament to how much the writers put in his character that the mystery of his intentions, past, and contract have been so debated on.
There are some takes I vehemently disagree with, but something a lot of people seem to have settled on is that Alastor is, behind his massive ego and cool-headed persona, insecure about his place in Hell after his long “sabbatical.” I want to do an episode-by-episode analysis of Alastor’s behavior and how Season 1 shifts our view of him from an unquestionably powerful Overlord to something with more depth, and while I won’t be speculating on who owns his soul and how he’ll break that contract in those post, I will take a guess at the future of his character in a narrative sense. I will also implicitly be addressing my issues with some of the conclusions others have made, or at least playing devil's advocate.
NOTE: I want to clarify that none of this is meant to depict Alastor as some poor woobie. He’s still awful. He’s in Hell for several reasons and being a serial killer is only one of them. Rather, I want to analyze what is shown to us about him, and how those story beats can be used to determine where he’ll end up by the finale of the series.
ALSO NOTE: I haven’t followed all of VivziePop’s comments outside of the show about the characters, and it’s possible that certain details have been changed between the release of the pilot and the show, so take any mentions of what hasn’t been explicitly depicted within the show with a grain of salt.
___
Part 1: Recap Analysis
This section will consist of commentary regarding Alastor's appearance and behavior in the given episodes, with retrospection based on new information given in later episodes if needed.
“Overture”: Alastor is pretty one-to-one with his depiction in the pilot in the first episode. He’s snarky, open about his sadism, but helpful if begrudgingly so. Interestingly, he’s able to put together a well-edited, if tonally awful, commercial, and probably could have done better if he weren’t intentionally being an ass about it. From the finale we know that he and Vox likely used to have a more magnanimous relationship, and it’s likely that he picked up some tools of the digital trade in that time despite or before being turned off completely by it.
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“Radio Killed the Video Star”: Vox effectively plays heel for Alastor this episode as we continue that first impression of the Radio Demon. We spend a good time showing off the former’s power and how far his roots have spread throughout Hell’s society, only for Alastor to effortlessly trounce him and steal from his audience, despite being gone for so long and his position in Hell less stable. This indicates that Alastor does still have pull, but at the same time that his position in the hierarchy of Hell is being contested due to the length of his absence. He deals with it easily here, but we’ll see in subsequent episodes that things aren’t as smooth as they first seem.
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“Scrambled Eggs”: In terms of the eggs, there’s not much to talk about. He begrudgingly accepts Vaggie’s request to get rid of them “humanely,” but brings them back to the hotel after they prove to be useful spies.
More importantly, we get our first small hint that Alastor’s ego can be bruised when Carmilla doesn’t humor him during the meeting between Overlords. Now, I actually disagree with a lot of the takes on this episode in that I think it indicates that at least some of Alastor’s views and need to prove himself as a powerful Overlord are the result of self-delusion. Yes, he does need to reestablish himself as a person not to be messed with after being gone for so long, but I think it isn’t as bad as some are making it out to be, which makes his behavior in later episodes more strange and excessive if anything.
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Carmilla, who mind you is a busy and stressed woman trying to hide the fact that she’s successfully murdered an angel, hits his ego by not caring where he’s been (something he wouldn’t have revealed in the first place), but she also welcomes him back, which is more than you could say to Velvette and by extension the Vees. And minutes before that, Zestial, who’s probably the highest on their totem pole, does go out of his way to meet with Alastor and inquire about where he’s been. Alastor himself gets over the slight pretty quickly and has no issue contributing to the meeting. Overall, he isn’t necessarily terrifying other overlords, but he still has an established place with them and they do seem to get along well enough. He’s “part of the group” unlike the Vees, who are treated more like upstart outsiders.
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I also want to point out that despite Zestial likely outranking Alastor in power, they seem to be alright with each other. Alastor is cordial and does not demonstrate a desire to antagonize him like he does Lucifer in the next episode. Speaking of which…
“Dad Beat Dad”: This episode gives us a lot to chew on and is the first major indicator that Alastor’s issues go beyond wanting to be the center of the room. From the very moment Lucifer walks into the hotel*, his eye is twitching and he is visibly pissed. Lucifer undermining him (notably contrasting Zestial, who is polite despite his power) doesn’t help and makes Alastor let loose his first swear in the entire show. Being the petty bitch he is, Alastor, knowing he can’t intimidate Lucifer in any way, immediately goes for his weak point–Charlie–and plays up the role of a caretaker for her and the hotel. It’s a low blow, but it also feels like a defense–he’s signaling to Lucifer that this is his hotel, that things are taken care of already, and that they do not need his assistance, even though they ultimately do in order to get a meeting with Heaven.
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But then things get more complicated with the appearance of Mimzy, who, to the surprise of several characters due to his solitary nature, was friends with Alastor all the way back when they were alive, and she carries a load of implications with her. She’s the only crack so far at what a “human” Alastor is like–apparently he’s a heavyweight drinker, a good dancer, and most notably, in Mimzy’s words, a sweet man who "becomes a kitten" when he's drunk. This is a huge departure from the unflappable, egotistical Radio Demon we’ve known up to now, and I think it’s a purposeful choice that we’re hearing this information but not shown it like his early days in Hell just prior. It’s simultaneously left to the imagination but difficult to do so because it contrasts so heavily with everything that has been shown to us beforehand. Another thing is that Mimzy is sure that Alastor will clean up her mess–and apparently this isn’t the first time he has, if Husk is anything to go by. So many people seem to miss this, but Alastor, who hates being tied down or disrespected, has been allowing Mimzy to leech off of him, presumably due to their past friendship making him turn a blind eye.
Alastor is on edge for this entire episode and is already unusually snappy when Husk addresses Mimzy, and pushing the button that was his contract is what sends him over the edge. His temper exploding is a direct result of his feeling that his control over both the hotel (via Lucifer) and his personal life (via Husk’s “doubt” that he can handle everything and that his reputation is what it used to be, plus the reminder of his deal) is being taken away from him. Alastor’s threat to Husk, which seems to not be his usual behavior if Husk’s willingness to show concern and talk back in the first place is anything to go by, is an attempt to remind both of them that he holds the cards, that he’s a powerful Overlord that is not to be trifled with, and he explicitly says as much when he goes out to deal with what Mimzy’s dragged in.
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It’s only after he lets his anger out on the mobsters and “proves himself” that he visibly calms down and makes the logical decision to tell Mimzy to leave with a serious attitude, and also doesn’t antagonize anyone for the rest of the episode. It seems like despite his fury earlier, he was listening to Husk, who’s rightfully smug about it. He’s even present when Charlie declares her desire to protect her people, and his smile seems just a tad bit more genuine.
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*Note: it’s not impossible that Alastor has some sort of personal grudge against Lucifer which caused his hate-on-first-sight, depending on the circumstances of his disappearance and contract (i.e. if it’s with Lilith).
“Hello Rosie!”: As opposed to Dad Beat Dad, Hello Rosie is arguably where we see Alastor at his most in-his-element. He gives off a lot of conflicting vibes at the beginning, from mocking Charlie’s distress to, in a shockingly honest moment, lecturing her about the importance of a smile to portray strength, a card we’d only been shown due to comments outside of the show. He smugly holds his knowledge over Charlie’s head but is visibly impatient to have her make a blank check of a deal with him, solid enough to benefit him but vague enough so that Charlie won’t feel immediately threatened. He’s clearly been waiting for an opportunity like this since the events of the pilot.
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After that, he puts back on his gentleman’s demeanor and introduces Charlie to Rosie, and from here on he’s arguably at his most comfortable in the entire show. He’s relaxed around Rosie and is actually willing to ask for her help (something I can’t see him doing with any other character), casually complains about Susan, is encouraging to and praises Charlie even behind her back, and most notably, gives her his radio cane unprompted. More on that later. He also mentioned wanting to guide Charlie to Rosie specifically, implying that he was being genuine about wanting to act as a mentor to her, though his intentions are probably self-beneficial.
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“The Show Must Go On”: The finale is arguably the most revealing episode on what Alastor’s inner world is like, as we see him unmasked several times. For one, his private admission to Niffty, the closest thing he has to a friend within the hotel, that he’s enjoyed watching the other residents connect to each other. This is in direct opposition to his initial (stated) reason for helping the hotel in that he wanted to watch them all fail, and yet he seems content with his initial assumptions being proven wrong. There’s no malice or sarcasm in this moment, he’s relaxed and talking to someone he relatively trusts.
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And so he goes into the battle swinging and confident. Then, of course, Adam.
I want to bring up something before we keep going. Yes, fighting Adam without angelic weaponry was a needless risk. Yes, Alastor fell victim to the very sloppiness and arrogance he accused Adam of, and it’s thematically appropriate that he was the only one to lose his battle in that he was fighting for his own ego more than “love.” But also, people seem to forget that Alastor is the only demon in the entire show with a precedent for permakilling without an explicit reliance on angelic weaponry, as the Overlords he toppled in his original rampage seem to have never returned. He’s egotistical, but not stupid. He may have genuinely believed that he had the means to kill Adam himself but didn’t get the chance/couldn’t due to his contract or absence possibly weakening him. But that's speculation for another day.
So, he has to retreat before Adam double-taps his ass and is too injured to return until after the extermination. He makes a grand exit, but not before grabbing the broken pieces of his radio cane. The one he allowed Charlie to use just an episode prior, and presumably is a conduit for his powers, and he grabs it while a murderous angel is inches away from wiping him off the face of Hell.
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His portion of “Finale” is the first time we see him singing alone and not playing off someone in a duet. It’s obvious that he’s trying to keep his composure, still speaking to himself in his artificial transatlantic accent (which we now know for a fact he doesn't need to do, seeing as he finally broke character when Adam wrecked his cane) and reassuring himself that he’ll come out on top next time. But here his front shatters and we openly see what the show has been hinting he is for the first time: a deeply paranoid, desperate, and unstable man.
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Essentially the worst-case scenario has happened: after a season of interfering with every attempt to capture him on camera, Vox has footage of him at his lowest point for all of Hell to see, and he’ll have “died” a martyr, a weakling, and still in the chains of an unwanted contract. For Alastor, who is so deeply afraid of showing any sign of vulnerability, who wants to be seen as a monstrous Overlord, it’s understandable that this humiliation is enough to send him into a mental spiral and recant any fondness for the hotel in favor of accomplishing his own goals. Worse yet, when we next see him he gives zero indication of any of this even when Charlie and company are simply glad that he's alive, which leaves us to wonder: has he been like this behind the smile from the very beginning?
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___
Part 2: Closing Thoughts and Future Speculation
With everything we’ve taken note of above, we can start to piece together a picture of who this guy is, and what the writers are going to do with him.
Alastor is sentimental. It’s not just his attachment to older technology or his love for being the center of everyone's attention. He likes being around people, he has friends, one of which he continuously indulged despite her using him multiple times, and he ultimately was starting to enjoy his time at the hotel before his defeat spooked him. Despite him using her, the fact that he was even willing to let Charlie use his cane (and note that he takes it from her as soon as she’s given a substitute, so that is a significant gesture for him) is an implicit display of trust whose implications don’t become apparent until the finale.
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But this is paired with deep insecurity. Alastor, despite being one of the most powerful people in the Pride Ring, has a crippling fear of being seen as vulnerable or “lesser” by others. There could be multiple overlapping reasons for this: the general climate of Hell, whatever happened to him seven years ago, his experiences as a mixed-race human living in Prohibition-era Louisiana, his original death, a natural predisposition, etc.
Regardless, this anxiety of his is so overwhelming that, when paired with the ever-present stress of not owning his own soul, it’s driving him insane. He made a splash in Hell upon entry and now he’s desperately trying to reinvoke that in order to defend himself both physically and mentally. He’s the gifted kid who’s slowly going nuts trying to keep up an impossible momentum as they grow older. He’s an ex-human denying his humanity because he doesn’t want to feel human. Everyone’s out to get him, and anyone who could be an enemy is an enemy unless he has total control over them via a contract, power, or the reassurance of years of close friendship. It’s why he’s cordial to Zestial but takes Carmilla (who wasn't even trying to spite him) and Lucifer’s comments personally, in the same way someone with low self-esteem might want to lash out against an authority figure who they feel is looking down on them.
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Worse yet, he can’t/won’t let these feelings out and is bottling them up so that no one will know he feels this way (note how quickly he was able to relax in Dad Beat Dad when he was given an outlet for his stress), because that’s a sign of weakness too. It’s honestly kind of frightening that in his final scene he gives zero indication of being injured or of just having had a meltdown. By all outside accounts, he’s his usual chipper self, and no one at the hotel save for maybe Husk, who can’t say anything Alastor doesn’t want him to, would realize anything is amiss. The reason his part of “Finale” is chilling isn’t just because of the implications that he will become an antagonist in the future–it’s that his mental state is so poor that he is no longer acting rationally, which makes him unpredictable in the worst possible way.
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I think Alastor’s character arc isn’t going to be redemption by way of going to Heaven, I don't think that place is his style anyway, but rather redemption of his own self-image. I don’t think the writers would make what is arguably the most popular and well-developed character in the show just to say that he’s hopelessly evil and simply end it at that. We’ve been exposed to multiple facets of his character, and while his deeds and probably his intentions are sinister, his underlying motivation for it all seems to be “freedom,” which decidedly isn’t (unless your name is Eren Jaeger).
I do believe that he’ll have his villain moment where he indulges in his worst impulses, but that ultimately it won’t do anything to fulfill him, because as we see in the official comics before the release of the show (which may no longer be canon but still give a viable “baseline” for the characters), when his desire to be feared and respected is granted, it only isolates him. Like the others, he’ll have to hit rock bottom before he can climb back up.
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Pentious, who was successfully redeemed, needed to understand that people weren’t out to get him, which allowed him to make the decision to put his friends before himself and trigger his selfless sacrifice. Angel, who’s well on his way to redemption, needed to realize he wasn’t alone and could rely on others, and his confidence and self-love has grown enormously since then. I think these are both lessons Alastor will need to learn eventually as well. He’s the manager of the hotel, but also undoubtedly a patient. He’s hungry for freedom, but only when he learns these lessons will he be truly free.
Or maybe I’m thinking too much into it idk lmaooooo
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ragingbookdragon · 3 months
Text
The door opens and he holds up the bottle of wine first with a yielding smile. “I brought wine this time.” He then holds up the roses. “Now you have two dozen red roses.”
She gives him an unimpressed look and he wants to falter, but he doesn’t.
“I can order Thai?”
“I thought I told you that you weren’t welcome here?” She replies and he reaches up with the hand holding the wine and scratches his neck with the tip of his pointer—he’s nervous.
“Maybe I should’ve brought the Thai too.”
She lets out a heavy sigh and turns to let him in. “I’d be an awful person to leave such a pitiful man outside like a kicked puppy.”
He snorts and follows, kicking the door closed with his foot as he steps into the living room.
“I’m going to go put something more comfortable on.”
His eyes trail up her legs to the hem of her nightie and he quips, “No, no, I wouldn’t dream of it.” When he sees the slits her eyes have become, he coughs. “I’m going to go put these roses in a vase.”
“Second shelf—’
“On the top left cabinet,” he throws her a smile. “I know.”
As she disappears into her bedroom, he hurries to the kitchen, grabs a vase, and then goes for the cabinet on the right and pulls down two wine glasses. The red liquid flows and he takes them into the living room as she returns wearing a robe that ends below her knees.
“I liked the nightie better,” he says. “That the one I bought you from France?”
She takes the wine glass he hands out and sits on the couch, pulling her knees up when he sits next to her. “What do you want?”
“To talk to you,” he answers, sipping his wine; his face pinches when he swallows.
“You don’t like wine. Why are you drinking it?”
“Because you like it.” He sets his glass down. “I’ve missed you.”
She averts her gaze, lowers her glass, and stares into the wine. “What do you want from me?”
“I want to be better for you,” he murmurs, large hands pulling her ankles to rest in his lap.
“You won’t,” she answers. “You never are.”
“I know.” His hands work into her calves, thumbs dipping into her muscle as he massages. “But I can try.”
“You’re always gone. You come back after missions, love up on me for a few weeks and then you’re off again.” Her throat tightens but she pushes through it. “Every time I want more, you tell me you aren’t in the position for a full-time relationship.” She meets his eyes, feels the tears grow in them. “I’m just a warm body for you to—”
His hand grips tight on her calf. “You have always been more than that to me,” he interrupts. “And I know I come back and leave. I push and pull you like tides and I break your heart every time I do. I know.” He gazes at her. “But I know what I feel for you.”
“It isn’t love,” she replies weakly. “If you loved me, you wouldn’t do this to me.”
He drops his gaze, lets out a heavy sigh. “I know I care about you.”
“I can’t keep letting you in.”
“I’m already here in your living room,” he tries to joke, and she gives him a sorrowed look.
“Into my heart,” she clarifies. “I can’t…I can’t keep doing it.”
He pulls away, gets up from the couch, and kneels before her. “I’m here.”
“For how long?” She asks and he lays his hands on her hips, pulls her to him so that her legs are hugging his chest.
“As long as you want me.”
“I want all of you,” she replies. “I don’t even know if you can give me that.”
He gazes into her eyes, holds her tight as he promises, “I am giving you all that I am right here and now.”
“But not forever?”
“I can’t promise forever,” he murmurs. “But I can promise now.”
She takes a moment to think, feels his fingers pressing into her hips and looks back at him. “…I’ve missed now.”
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luciddownloading · 3 months
Text
Tarot Reading: What Are Their Thoughts and Fantasies Of You? 😍
Hi and welcome or welcome back to my blog for another Tarot reading. I felt called to do a love-based reading, regarding what your person is currently thinking and fantasizing about when it comes to you. Now, you can make this fit into something more platonic if you like and if it resonates. But, I am strongly getting the vibe, for the majority of you, that this will be about romance.
Before I even start, I can already tell that some people who seriously fumbled are coming through. Today's collective message seems to be: they fumbled the bag (aka you) and they know it. It also seems like a lot of my fellow feminines are recognizing their worth and no longer putting up with anything low-vibrational or that doesn't honor them. And I love that for you guys!
Past people will most likely come through, so if you're over it and don't want to hear it, I understand. But, if you need some closure or confirmation or validation of your intuitive hits, then this might be the reading for you! Whatever the case, your free will always matters. Just because I am telling you that someone wants you back or is coming back doesn't mean you're fated or obligated to be with them.
As always, a) this reading is timeless and b) only take what resonates. Pick the picture that you feel most drawn to. It's okay to pick more than one. Then, see what your pile(s) has to say!
PS: I have gotten into the habit of not taking reversals, so I won't be for this reading. That's my preference for now, as it helps me channel more clearly.
PILE 1
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PILE 2
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PILE 3
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PILE 4
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PILE 1
Ten of Pentacles
(clarified by: The Hierophant)
Death
(clarified by: Eight of Cups)
The Lovers
(clarified by: Ace of Wands)
Ten of Wands (back of the deck)
Pile 1, this is some heavy duty energy here! Your person, first off, feels like they have a very "head in the clouds" side to them. Fittingly, for this reading and its pictures. Not to say that they can't be grounded because they do have that energy, too. But, they are a MAJOR daydreamer and I think they spend a ton of time thinking about you. Fantasy by Mariah Carey is the channeled song here. "I'm in Heaven! With my boyfriend" Or girlfriend. Whatever applies. That's like their energy toward you. Except I don't think you guys are actually together. So, this Heaven is just in their head.
Oh, but here's the thing: they might actually have a boyfriend or girlfriend. Or a spouse. I feel, for most of you, this third party is a relatively new or not too serious relationship. But, they are TIRED. Very unhappy in it. And I get the vibe that they had an opportunity to choose between you and this other person. And, well, we can see how that ended up! Omg, you know what just came through? Like how, on The Bachelor or some other dating show, the person is picking between two final contestants. And they pick one and hurt the other. But, the joke is on them because that person they let go was so much better or loved them so much. That's how this person feels about you. For some of you, they may even make that analogy in their head and fantasize about picking you instead on their own "dating show". Lol your person has a very colorful imagination!
You know what I also see? Tiffany Pollard, aka New York, aka Mother of Reality TV. The scene where she's rejected in Flavor of Love 2, in the finale, and crying in the limo. But, then, she goes on to get her own dating show and become even more of a star. That's how this person thinks of you. They know they lost somebody amazing, who they see as a real soulmate, all while they're investing their time in... Okay, I don't want to say "the real loser" but that's what this person thinks, deep down, about who they're with. Yikes! They don't actually like them very much. They may have only gotten with them to rebound from you or make you jealous or find some replacement for you. But, you cannot be replaced or duplicated!
Yeah, they actually compare this person a lot to you. They are actually much more attracted to you. Very sexually drawn to you. I am not picking up anything shady right now, as far as them wanting to "step out". But, um, let's just say, when they're with this person, in bed, they're often thinking of you. If you guys have been physical, they definitely replay those memories. I think it's very hard for them because they want to do what's right and they don't want to hurt this person. But, they are not at all over you and, essentially, they wish you were the one by their side.
I have to be honest, though. They pretty much made their own bed. Not just because they didn't pick you but because they are STILL staying stuck in this situation that they don't want to be in. This person really, really idealizes relationships and commitment. I actually get the feeling that they initially idealized this third party and the life they could have with them. Until they got with them and that shattered. But, they still feel a need to stick it out for... reasons. They definitely take a "sunken cost fallacy" approach to relationships, believing that they just can't break up with someone once they've invested time and energy into it.
Your person could have their Sun, Moon or Rising in the signs of Taurus, Gemini or Scorpio. They are this odd mix of flighty and inconsistent yet very rigid. A need to be in control. Maybe this relationship gives them that. If this person isn't with someone, I think this may not be your pile. Because it's such a strong message. You most likely know about it, too, and know it's mostly for show. Your person fantasizes about this perfect relationship they could have with you, instead. It's like every "couple moment" they have with their person, they imagine what it'd be like with you. They feel like you are done with them, though, or wouldn't want them anymore. They could be right! Maybe you've moved on or they're very paranoid about you being with someone else. They could be grieving the loss of this connection heavily, especially if you're the one who walked away.
I do think they'll circle back, in some way, probably when they end this connection with the other person (because I don't see it lasting too long). You've most definitely made a huge impact on them and have made them want to change their old ways. But, will they? Right now, it's very slow progress, if at all. They spend more time daydreaming about being a "better" version of themselves to win you back than actually working on themselves. So, if you take them back, use your discernment. Also, be aware of how much they can build a potential partner up, unrealistically, in their head, to a degree that is impossible for said partner to live up to.
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PILE 2
Queen of Cups
(clarified by: The Moon)
Knight of Swords
(clarified by: Wheel of Fortune)
Ace of Swords
(clarified by: The Chariot)
The Hermit (back of the deck)
Pile 2, your person hardly knows what they're thinking. I get the feeling that they often don't WANT to fantasize about you because, when they do, it's all consuming and overwhelming. I definitely feel like this is a "separation/no contact" situation that your person doesn't know how to navigate. They are all over the place these days and very troubled, no matter how they try to appear on the outside. No matter how they try to fool themselves (and they are experts in self-deception). They are not as okay as they want to come across to others right now.
We have a lot of signs here that they could have personal placements in: Cancer and Pisces as well as any of the Fixed signs (Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius) and also the sign of Virgo. This person is being pushed to do some soul searching. "For the first time in their life" is what came through. That might be you or their Guides. But, yeah, this person is STUBBORN and has spent a very, very long time clinging to old ideas and, honestly, their own bullshit. Interestingly, I am not getting a lot of "fantasy" out of this pile. No, your person is being pushed to finally wake the fuck up.
A big message coming through, in regards to you, is that they are finally realizing what they had "wrong" before. But, I put emphasis on "wrong" because that's how they see it, in their black-or-white mind. They are often way too judgmental, too logical and disconnected from their emotions. It's not like they don't have emotions, in spite of how they may act. In fact, I get the vibe that, deep down, they actually don't let anyone see that. Including themselves. You got hurt in the process here because they may have been emotionally unavailable or denied their love for you or played around with your feelings. Whatever it was, it caused this separation that you two are most likely in. And I can see your person taking some real accountability for that. Sorry, Blame It On Me by Akon is your channeled song. So, the lyrics may be a message from your person.
However, I don't think they're truly ready to come forward yet. That pride of theirs is pretty absurd. They are less in ego than they used to be but still approaching things in an ego-based way. They don't want to embarrass themselves, especially if they fear you don't want to talk to them or be with them anymore. Actually, they fantasize about all of the potential outcomes of your next conversation. I think they do that to alleviate their anxiety but it just makes it worse. Even though they can picture you being open and reasonable, they can also picture the conversation going horribly wrong and that kind of shuts them down and makes them want to hide.
I also think they see you as this Queen of Cups figure. So, you may have placements in Water (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces). I think you were very vulnerable and emotionally open with them, last time you talked, and they weren't very sensitive or understanding. They daydream about going back and redoing that conversation, especially since they can actually understand what you were talking about now. They view you as a very spiritual person, most likely because you've discussed it with them. You might have even discussed it in regards to your relationship, as in saying you think they're your twin flame or soulmate or telling them about synchronicities regarding this connection. But, that wasn't something they were equipped to take seriously then.
And I am not saying this person has necessarily grown leaps and bounds since. But, they have started awakening spiritually and you played a major role in that. Maybe they're getting into Tarot readings or astrology for the first time. Something I am getting is that they wish you two were talking so you could teach them about all of what they're (cautiously) exploring. They feel like you have some mysterious wisdom and knowledge that they don't and they're craving access to it. Because they feel like it would give them much needed solutions or answers. They're still approaching it from a more "rational" perspective but they're slowly opening up.
They also dwell a lot on your connection and they, too, might be convinced that you're divine counterparts. I can see someone looking at one of those twin flame communities online and trying to learn more and connect the dots. They are truly just trying to figure out the language you speak. If they still have texts or DM's or emails from you where you communicated your feelings or spiritual insights, they read them a lot. They believe you're psychic (and I do, too!). You somehow have just known certain things about them and it had them SHOOK. It still kind of does. But, I honestly feel like they don't plan on doing much of anything right now. I think they either a) expect you to just use your "mind-reading skills" (their words, not mine) to automatically know what they want from you or b) for the Universe to just magically bring you back to them. They are trying to develop faith in the Universe but aren't recognizing that they still have to make their own choices. They can't hand their free will over, in this regard. Also, just because you already psychically know what's going on with them doesn't mean that they shouldn't take that step and voice their true feelings.
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PILE 3
Six of Pentacles
(clarified by: Two of Cups)
Page of Cups
(clarified by: Three of Cups)
Seven of Pentacles
(clarified by: Knight of Wands)
Eight of Wands (back of the deck)
Pile 3, you have some different vibes than the others. This could be romantic but, for a lot of you, I am feeling like it's more platonic. This is someone who is or was a very close friend. I am getting "best friend breakup" as a message. So, this is very likely someone who was once your bestie but you had a falling out. Maybe you drifted apart but I get the sense that there was some sort of major disagreement or conflict that caused this breakup. In any case, I feel like your person fantasizes a lot about making it better. Making it up to you somehow. I feel like they were the ones in the wrong, in terms of whatever went down. Not to say you're perfect but I think you tried your best. I also think there's some sort of "energetic debt" here, as I call it. It's like you gave and gave so much to this person and their unfair treatment of you makes them feel like they owe you something. It could actually be money. Or maybe they want to help you financially. They also could just owe you some sort of apology or explanation.
Yes, the apology is a big message. Apologize by One Republic may resonate. There is kind of an eagerness from them, too, in this regard. I feel like, without you in their life, things have gotten kind of boring or stale. I will be honest. It feels somewhat like they want you back in their life for their own gain. They felt like they really, really benefited from having you close. So they think and daydream about being close to you again. Things going back to the way they were. Little do they realize that things can't truly go back to how they were then. You aren't the same person you were then. I feel like you may have indulged this person a lot or you were constantly trying to make them happy or comfortable.
Definite people pleaser or overgiver energy coming from you. I always have a pile that I have to give this message to. But, I give it with love. You might have realized that a huge part of this relationship, whatever it was, was built on your kindness and generosity toward them. Because of this, that's a major reason why they're missing you. "Nobody can make me feel the way you do", they think. Well, obviously! There is no one quite like you. BUT, what gives me pause is the question of how much this person actually loves you and how much they just love how you make them feel. With them, there's a thin line between the two and I don't think I am telling you anything you haven't already perceived. I think you know this person's agenda.
That doesn't mean that they don't have real love for you because they actually do. They're just very self-absorbed in how they express it. The connection between you two was also real and went deep. Like, past life connection deep. I think you two shared your emotions with each other in a very vulnerable way. You definitely did, anyway. They did to some extent, actually more with you than they do with others. But, they have a very wounded inner child and they sort of looked to you to provide them with a certain healing, support, or comfort. You made them feel safe, which is why this connection ending was like the rug being pulled from under them. I think you both might have had inner child wounding and maybe saw yourselves in one another in that way. But, you grew and healed greatly. They're not quite there yet.
There is a significant Water emphasis here (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces), so this person could have placements in any of those signs. Their energy is kind of funny. It's sensitive and vulnerable yet closed off. Their ego is like a shield and they keep their defenses high. In some ways, they have tried hard NOT to think about you, in the past, or maybe still do. They try to act like all is well, like they're thriving and have their mind on other things. But, this is not only bullshit. It's a facade of "confidence" to compensate for their immaturity and insecurity. For some of you, this person has tried to emerge from this as "the winner". It's silly for many reasons, especially since you don't even care about that. You're in your own lane but they are trying to barge into yours, while acting like they're not. If this is a former friend, they have taken this breakup as hard as a romantic ending. They treat you like an ex that they loudly claim they're over but think about all the time.
I definitely feel like this has had social ramifications. Like mutual friends have gotten involved. But, while this person may have played the victim, I feel like people from your social circle have either stayed neutral or inevitably took your side. I don't mean to drag this person but they can be exhausting and lack the self-awareness sometimes to know when they're being the asshole, all while pointing the finger at the other person. But, most people have peeped their game. I get the sense, for some of you, that you also kind of broke up with your mutual friends or social scene, too, once things ended with this person. Maybe you feared that they had too much social influence and others would turn on you. But, in actuality, their childishness is making people turn on them.
Best Friend by Doja Cat and Saweetie is coming through. That's how this person idealizes you, which is funny because they're also a low-key to high-key hater of yours, especially these days. You are the one who hyped them up, like that song, and they fed on it. The funny message about this, too, is that Doja and Saweetie were more so performing a best friend bond for the song. If I'm not mistaken, they're cool and they're friends but not actually besties in real life. This person is more so in love with the aesthetic of you as a close friend and the way you made them look good. I get the impression that a lot of you are highly attractive and very charismatic and that's a big reason they kept you around.
Again, not trying to villainize them. It's just that their energy is so... surface level. A bit of depth there but I wouldn't be shocked if they want you back to just show off your bond to your mutual friends again. "Hey, look, the dynamic duo is back!" Obviously, use discernment here, in terms of how genuine they are because I do think they can be super-charming and influence people when they want. They think back a lot to your past social life together. For most of you, it involved partying, going out, drinking. They may look at that time as their "glory days" or even the last period of their "youth". They had less worries and concerns, partly because you were with them. So, they romanticize this period a lot, possibly looking at old pictures or videos on social media regularly. I do think you two had a lot of fun together. You're a blast to be around and their life is significantly less fun without you.
/////////
PILE 4
The Lovers
(clarified by: Queen of Swords)
The Sun
(clarified by: Six of Cups)
Ten of Swords
(clarified by: Page of Pentacles)
Wheel of Fortune (back of the deck)
Pile 4, this isn't just about one person. This is about a few people/handful of people and it is hard to pinpoint it. I wouldn't be surprised if you were drawn to the other piles because they have more specific messages about a certain individual. This is more about a pattern in your life that I feel is highly karmic. I would say that your Guides are drawing attention to it but it's not like you don't know. You are well aware of these patterns and pushing through the effects. Essentially, you are on the healing journey that you were always meant to be on, whether you have just started it, after some difficult relationship experiences, or you are persevering through it.
Something I feel called to say is to please not make excuses for someone or rationalize or romanticize their toxic behavior because you think they're your twin flame. I don't want to be harsh but the truth some of you may be dealing with right now is that a certain someone who you thought was your twin flame really isn't. I don't believe in the "false twin flame" label and this person is likely a very important soul connection. But it doesn't mean they're your twin. It also doesn't mean that you have to sit around, waiting for them to heal or mature or put in effort or commit. You could be selling yourself short by doing so. And hey, don't shoot the messenger! Lol some of you needed to hear that, from your Guides, but some of you have already had this epiphany.
Yeah, I am being redirected from talking about what they're thinking. This is about you! You know why? You have put more than enough effort into disappointing connections in the past. It's time to give that love to yourself! You are being represented as this Queen of Swords (doesn't matter if you're male or female, it's just your energy). You could have your Sun, Moon or Rising in Air: Gemini, Libra, Aquarius. You are definitely feminine while also being shrewd, assertive, and with a savage side. You know how to get a little cutthroat when needed and when to cut people out. Whatever your current love situation is, your Guides trusted and knew that it was only a matter of time before you leveled up and moved on.
I'm hearing Why Should I Be Sad by Britney Spears. An absolute bop! (Her Blackout album is pop perfection, if you didn't already know) Anyway, that's your energy right now. You could cry right now over so-and-so but you've done enough of that. Or maybe you do need a good cry or two still. It's okay! But, I think, even as you're sobbing, in the back of your mind, you know there's only so much time left for that until you bounce back like the bad bitch you are. Your Guides are applauding you and so proud of you. I am getting the message that they never have to do much with you. You don't require a lot of interference. You still need help, of course, but you are so wise and smart and strong that you learn a lot of your lessons on your own, especially in love. You reach your threshold in terms of nonsense in relationships and then you're out. I am also sensing that they do sometimes give you "rude awakenings" (like this reading maybe lol). But, the good thing is that you actually pay attention and learn what you need to, instead of just ignoring or getting defensive at the truth like so many people do.
Yet, you still have a heart and it's complex. I feel like, in spite of that resolve, you might still look back at the past, at people from your past, and idealize the connection or romanticize it. But, then, you come to your senses. It's a cycle and a process, so be compassionate and patient with yourself. And don't try TOO hard to move on or get over someone or you won't be truly dealing with your feelings. Still, you have reached a point where you are definitely through with certain people and where exes, people who were once so appealing, are not nearly as attractive as they once we're. It's like you met them drunk, at a bar at 1 AM, and now you're meeting them again, sober, in the light of day, and they look very different now.
As far as what they're thinking of you? Well, they are pretty scared of coming forward. You have a certain bite when you're displeased that can scare some love interests. But, the ones who are scared are usually the ones who need to be called out or held accountable. Even when you do so graciously or civilly, you can hurt some feelings. But, it's worth it to be honest. I am definitely sensing one or two people from the past, who have put you through plenty of disappointment or heartache, as well as a more recent love interest who you would like to leave in your rear view. But, of course, just take that how it resonates.
You are highly desirable, even though you are seen as intimidating (maybe even because of that, at times), and you have plenty of options. But, I hear you thinking, "Do I, really?" Not out of self-doubt but out of a distaste for those who are coming forward or want to come forward. Again, you are leveling up and don't have the tolerance for what you used to tolerate anymore. I can definitely see a new powerful soulmate connection coming in for you this year. One that will actually be healthy and mutually satisfying. And this will happen because you have released these karmic or stagnant connections. You are making space for someone that will actually be fulfilling.
So, it may be exhausting now but please keep going forward and don't look back. It's time. You gave those past people enough chances. And, yes, they will be absolutely kicking themselves once they realize they have missed their chance. Some are already doing that. Because I am picking up a karmic vibe, they will experience the repercussions of not learning their lesson and growing as well as the intense regret of losing someone as awesome as you.
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steddieas-shegoes · 9 months
Note
Request: wrong number au, Eddie texts Gareth something personal but puts in 1 wrong number & ends up texting Steve. The two of them hit it off & start chatting & then when they meet IRL they are completely head over heels in love & its cute as fuck
MY LOVE MY LOVE MY LOVE!!! LOVE A GOOD WRONG NUMBER AU!!! I can't believe I've never written it before now. I also had to actually include Gareth because I am actually obsessed with him lately, and I just think it's really neat that we can make these characters our own. This was such a fun and cute request! I didn't do the inappropriate route because I thought this was hilarious so sorry about that. I made up for it with something else! - Mickala ❤️
----------------------------------------------------------
GARE BEAR! You won’t believe it but i dropped my phone in a sewer. Lost everything.
He had never been so happy about having his closest friends’ numbers memorized. His phone was somewhere under the streets of Chicago, floating through dirty water and sewage, dying a slow and painful death.
He texted everyone else one at a time, let them know he had a new number and to completely delete the old one because it would never be recovered.
They were used to things like this happening; He lost his phone annually at this point and it was cheaper just to get a new number than transfer everything to a new one.
He went to dial Wayne, the old school part of him insisting on phone calls instead of texts still, when Gareth’s name popped up with a new text.
Not sure who Gare Bear is, but sorry about your phone. That’s shitty.
Eddie let out a loud laugh.
did you mean to make a pun?
Did it make you laugh?
yes
Then yes.
Eddie sat down on a bench, entirely focused on his conversation with this stranger.
Did you find your Gare Bear yet?
Not yet but i think i’m pretty happy talking to you for now
Smooth, Eddie.
Admittedly, he was in a hell of a dry spell.
Going on almost two years, actually.
A little flirting with a stranger never hurt anybody, not when he clearly needed some practice.
Not sure if your Gare Bear would like it very much though
Wait, what?
Eddie stared at his phone, trying to comprehend what that could mean. Why would Gareth not want him talking to a stranger?
I hope you find your partner though!
Oh.
Oh!
Eddie hit the call button in the corner before he could even register what he was doing.
“Hello?”
Oh no, he sounded hot.
“Hi. So, Gareth is very much not my partner. He probably actually wishes I would really forget his number,” Eddie rushed out.
“Um. Okay?”
“He’s been my best friend for ten years and he thinks I’m a mess. Not a partner,” Eddie further clarified.
“Got it. Not a partner.”
“Yes, exactly.”
They stayed silent for a moment before Eddie coughed.
“I’m Eddie, by the way.”
“Steve. Sorry about your phone, seriously that sucks,” he sounded genuinely apologetic, like he personally threw Eddie’s phone in the sewer.
“Oh, no big deal. I lose my phone more often than I go out with someone,” Eddie said.
Why did he say that?
Steve let out a laugh and it was like music.
Eddie couldn’t help the smile taking over his face at his laugh, already knew he wasn’t gonna be able to let this guy go without learning more about him.
“So you’re, what? Celibate?” Steve asked.
“Far from it. Well, maybe not far from it. Temporarily, maybe. It’s been a while,” Eddie admitted.
“How long?” Steve asked, a loud bang coming from his end of the phone. “Sorry, I had to go outside for some privacy.”
Eddie wasn’t going to read into that. He wasn’t.
“Two years give or take. I mean I’m not counting shitty dates that ended before they got worse. So, yeah. Two years.”
“Been a year for me, but. Yeah, I get it. My last relationship didn’t end on the best terms. She decided I was too in love with her I guess,” Steve sighed, voice sounding pained.
She.
Steve was probably straight.
There was no way he’d be lucky enough for Steve to like men.
Or for Steve to like him.
“I can’t really imagine breaking up with someone because they loved me too much. I’m usually the one who falls too hard,” Eddie admitted.
“Yeah, well, same here,” Steve sounded sad, a bit withdrawn.
Eddie wanted to hear him laugh again.
“I doubt either of us have ever fallen as hard as my phone did down a drain,” Eddie said sadly.
Steve let out a loud laugh and Eddie smiled.
“This might sound crazy, but I’m kind of glad your phone decided to live in the sewers,” Steve said when he finally calmed down. “And maybe a little too happy that you typed your friend’s number wrong.”
“Oh really? Why’s that?”
Was this flirting? Was he successfully having a flirtatious conversation with a potentially very hot guy?
“So I can be bold and ask if you maybe wanted to meet up somewhere?” Steve asked hesitantly.
“So you’re in Chicago?” Eddie asked.
“Yeah. You?”
“For the last five years, yeah.”
“You busy tonight?”
Eddie’s heart stopped.
He was really going to meet up with a stranger just because he liked his laugh and hoped he was hot.
He’d done more with less.
“Yeah, actually. I’m getting dinner with this guy I accidentally texted,” Eddie smirked, looking down at his feet.
“Dinner? What a lucky guy. Where are you going?” Steve sounded amused.
“Well, it depends on what he likes. I’ve been craving some pierogies. Ever been to Staropolska?” Eddie asked.
Gareth’s family owned it, and he used to eat there two or three times a week while they were in college, usually working off his bill in the kitchen doing dishes after.
He hadn’t been in a couple months, work keeping him busy and his budget being pretty tight when he moved into a studio apartment by himself.
He had enough to treat himself tonight though.
“The one on Milwaukee? Yeah. One of my favorite places to get devolay,” Steve sounded surprised that he knew it.
“You won’t believe this, but the friend I was trying to text when I got you, his family owns that place.”
“No way! Then we have to. We owe it to the guy who has almost my exact phone number,” Steve responded.
“Meet you there at seven?” Eddie asked, suddenly more nervous.
“Seven sounds good.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
Steve giggled. Eddie fell in love.
“We should probably hang up.”
“Should we?” Eddie asked, not wanting to stop talking to him yet.
“Yes, I have to do my hair. Gotta impress the guy who drops his phone in the sewer and texts strangers about it.”
“He sounds like a loser. Don’t put too much effort in,” Eddie sighed. “But okay. See you at seven.”
“See you then.”
They both stayed on the line for a minute.
“Okay. For real. Bye,” Steve laughed.
“Bye, Stevie.”
He hung up before he could convince himself to talk to him for the rest of the afternoon.
He breathed out a loud sigh, smiling as he realized he had a date.
He dialed Gareth’s real number immediately.
“Gareth, I have a date!”
“What is this number, Eddie?”
“Oh, I dropped my phone in the sewers. Not important. I have a date!”
“Jesus Christ. Okay. Come over then.”
—-----------------------------------
Gareth had been his pre-date hype man since high school, though he wasn’t very good at it.
Mostly he calmed Eddie’s nerves and helped make sure his hair didn’t look like he just woke up, which was often its unfortunate state of being.
“So, you don’t know this guy,” Gareth said from his bed.
“No.”
“And you talked for like two seconds and decided you’re in love with him,” he continued.
“Yes.”
“And you think this is totally normal and sane?”
“I didn’t say that. But we just…I dunno. We clicked. I haven’t been that at ease with someone in a long time. It felt natural,” Eddie fell back on his bed, starfishing so his arm and leg hit Gareth’s legs.
“Dude, I’m not discouraging it. I’m happy for you. I just don’t want you to be disappointed if it isn’t as easy when you meet,” Gareth said softly.
“Yeah, thanks. I think it’ll be okay, though.”
“Alright. Tell babcia I’m coming by tomorrow for lunch.”
Eddie sat up and gave Gareth a quick hug.
“Thanks Gare Bear!”
—-------------------------------------------
He arrived 20 minutes early so he could sneak in the back to say hi to Gareth’s grandmother, who still insisted on getting her hands on the food every day for a couple of hours despite being nearly 80 years old.
“Babcia!”
“Eddie! My kochany! You forget to visit and I forget what you look like!” she rushed over, flour and oil stains all over her apron.
He should have kept some distance so his shirt didn’t get ruined, but he ignored the part of his brain telling him to look perfect for his date so he could get a hug.
“You know I have to watch my money,” he said against her shoulder.
“And you know I feed you for free if you clean up after yourself. No excuse,” she pulled away and looked him over. “You look handsome. Why?”
Eddie put his hands on his hips.
“What? Don’t I always look handsome?”
“Of course, but this is different. Your hair is smooth and you smell like the perfume store,” she smirked. “Is it a girl? Or a boy? Or a someone?”
“It’s a boy. We’ve never met in person, so I wanted to make a good first impression,” he admitted.
“Oh! How lovely! What’s his name?” She was back to kneading dough, but kept her eyes on him.
“Steve. He actually has been here before, loves the devolay?”
Babcia froze.
“Steve? Oh goodness.” She turned to the sink and washed her hands, muttering under her breath about something.
Eddie’s heart sank. Babcia didn’t seem happy about this.
“What’s wrong? You know him?”
“Oh, yes.”
“Is he not a good guy? Has he been mean to you? I’ll call and cancel right now,” he insisted, reaching for his phone in his pocket.
“No, no. Nothing like that. He is a very sweet boy. He got broken up with in this restaurant a few months back. Tore me to pieces. He just sat here for hours crying. I moved him to a corner booth for his privacy and he left me a $100 tip and ever since then when he comes in I make sure to give him as many szarlotka as he wants.” She touched Eddie’s shoulder. “You be good to him. He has a nice heart.”
Eddie’s mind raced.
Why had Steve agreed to come here for a date if this is where he’d been broken up with? Why did he even bother coming back if it held such bad memories?
What if he didn’t see this as a date?
The front door chimed and he heard the employee at the front welcome someone.
“He will be good for you, drogi.”
Eddie nodded before making his way to the front, stopping in his tracks when he saw the most beautiful man he’d ever seen standing at the podium, talking to the employee with a smile.
“That’s him,” Babcia said from behind him. “Go get him.”
She shoved him forward, nearly making him trip, which caught the attention of Steve.
He looked over with a curious smile, and then realization seemed to hit him.
“Steve?” Eddie managed to ask, loud enough to be heard over the few full tables in the restaurant.
“Eddie?” he asked back, hesitantly moving towards him.
“I, um,” Eddie started, then cleared his throat. “I usually sit by the window, if that’s okay?”
“That’s perfect,” Steve nodded.
It was cliche, like the room around them closed into just them existing together, like the stars had aligned exactly right for this moment to happen.
They sat down at the table Eddie usually sat at, staring across the table at each other in slight awe.
Eddie really hoped that Steve was having the same feelings he was.
But one thing was stopping Eddie from being completely enraptured.
“Is this a date?” he asked suddenly.
“What?” Steve seemed surprised by his question. “I mean, yeah. I’d like it to be. I thought it was.”
Eddie nodded once, but remained quiet, thinking.
“Oh God, it wasn’t, was it? You were just being nice. What is it with this restaurant? If I didn’t love the food so much or babcia, I would never step foot here again, I swear-”
Eddie put his hand on Steve’s to calm him down, frown on his face.
“Woah. What?”
“I just. I don’t have the best history with dates here and I guess I didn’t learn the first time something bad happened, and now I’m being too much too fast again in this place and-”
Eddie pulled Steve’s hand up to his face, placing a soft kiss to his knuckles.
“Stevie, calm down. This is a date. I’ll have as many dates here as you want to to get rid of whatever negative stuff you associate with this place. Babcia would hate that I ruined this place for you,” he said quietly.
Steve seemed to relax at his words.
And if you wanna tell me about what happened, you can. If it’ll help,” Eddie offered.
Before Steve could reply, Gareth’s cousin, Ben, came to take their order.
It was a quick order, both knowing exactly what they wanted, and then Steve looked back at him.
“It’s just. My last girlfriend, who I was with for almost three years, dumped me here. It was kind of out of the blue for me, and I had a really hard time that night.”
Eddie felt his heart break.
How could someone do that to Steve? He didn’t need to know him better to know that he didn’t deserve that, especially not if babcia had taken him under her wing so quickly.
“She must be awful to have let you go like that,” Eddie squeezed Steve’s hand in his, resisting the urge to go to his side of the table and hold him.
Steve shrugged and looked down at their hands.
“I mean, I should have known. She was never much for romance or spending time together that didn’t involve work or school. I was looking at engagement rings and she was looking at apartments to get away from me. I was just…really blinded by what I thought was love,” Steve smiled sadly at him.
“It wasn’t?”
“Well, it may have been a type of love. It was more comfort than anything. She was kind of all I had for the first year we were together, and I think I just ignored how unhealthy that was for both of us. And then I met Robin in college, and she was like the opposite of Nancy in every way. A few months before Nancy broke up with me, I told her that Robin’s parents kicked her out when she came out to them and that she needed a place to stay until we graduated. She agreed, then never made any attempt at getting to know her. And I didn’t read into it, Nancy isn’t like, super talkative with people she isn’t already close with, and Robin just kinda stayed to herself when Nancy was home.” Steve took a shaky breath. “But it turns out she didn’t bother getting to know her because she already knew she was gonna break up with me and leave the apartment to me and Robin, so.she just. Didn’t bother. Robin warned me, but I didn’t listen.”
Eddie wanted to cry.
Steve’s voice was full of pain, but not in a way that told him he still loved her, or still hoped they would get back together. More that she broke a part of him that he still hadn’t been able to fix no matter how hard he tried or wanted to.
“Was she jealous?” Eddie asked, trying so hard to understand what could have happened.
“I dunno. I mean, Robin’s a lesbian, and I definitely never had feelings for her anyway. Nancy was always so sure of herself, I can’t imagine she’d be jealous.”
“It sounds like she didn’t appreciate you very much.”
“What do you mean?” Steve didn’t sound mad, just curious.
“Well, she didn’t even make an effort to get to know your best friend, right? And it sounds like she was too busy focusing on her future to even think about what you looked like in it, and instead of trying to plan it with you, she made a future for her. She sounds a bit selfish,” Eddie shrugged.
Instead of being upset, Steve laughed.
God, Eddie loved that laugh.
“Sorry, it’s just that you sound exactly like Robin. You’d probably be two peas in a pod.”
“Tell me about her,” Eddie genuinely wanted to know more about the person who kept Steve going.
Their food arrived in the middle of the story of how Steve and Robin met, but it didn’t stop him from continuing.
Eddie listened with a fond smile, filling in Steve’s gaps of silence as he chewed a bite of food with questions or something related to what he’d been talking about.
It was easy.
It was fun.
Halfway through the meal, Steve’s foot rested against one of his and it felt like electricity shooting through his bones.
Eddie told him about Gareth, and his family who had pretty much adopted him when they both moved here from a small town in Indiana. He talked about his uncle who raised him for most of his life, who visited every Christmas despite being on a really tight budget.
Time passed quickly, but not at all.
They hadn’t realized how long they’d been sitting there until babcia came out without her apron to hand deliver an apple tart.
“You boys enjoy. I’ll see you both soon!” she said as she smacked a kiss on top of each of their heads.
Both of them blushed, but tried to cover it up with a bite of food.
As they finished, Steve looked outside to see how dark it was, how few people were left walking the streets.
“Guess we should head out,” he muttered, sounding like that was the last thing he wanted to do.
“Would you wanna come to my place? We don’t have to do anything except talk, I promise. I just don’t really want this to end yet,” Eddie suggested.
“Really? I haven’t bored you?” Steve asked, just a hint of self-deprecation in his tone.
Eddie shook his head.
“Not at all. I’d really like to get a chance to love you the way you deserve,” Eddie said.
Steve’s eyes widened.
Eddie should back up, should say something less intense.
But if this ruined it, then at least he said what he was thinking.
“You think you could love me?” Steve asked, barely more than a whisper.
“I think I already do a little,” Eddie admitted.
Steve blinked at him for a moment, mouth slightly agape.
“I need to kiss you,” he finally said.
“Now? Here?” Eddie smiled.
“Now. Here.”
“I won’t stop you.”
Steve stood from the table and stood in front of Eddie, placing both hands on his cheeks and leaning down.
Their lips brushed in a barely-there kiss, softer than Eddie expected.
Steve stayed there for a moment, eyes closed, and Eddie couldn’t help the words tumbling from him.
“You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.”
If someone had said it to him, he would think they were just trying to get him into their bed, but that wasn’t the case here and he hoped Steve knew that.
“People used to call me a charmer, but I don’t think I’m half as good at it as you,” Steve whispered, his breath ghosting against Eddie’s lips.
“Just honest.”
“Take me home,” Steve said, opening his eyes and staring at Eddie, his eyes glowing with something close to love.
—-------------------------------------
They stayed up all night, never doing more than kissing and mapping out patterns on each others’ skin.
They talked about everything, even the painful parts of life, even the parts that they hadn’t shared with anyone else.
It didn’t make any sense that someone who had been a stranger not even 24 hours ago could already mean so much.
When the sun started to shine through the curtains of Eddie’s apartment, Steve sighed and buried his face in Eddie’s neck.
“I have to go to work,” though he burrowed his entire body further into the bed and Eddie’s side.
“You could call in sick,” Eddie suggested, pressing a kiss to the top of Steve’s head.
“Robin would kill me.”
He and Robin worked together as team teachers at an elementary school. When one of them missed, it left the other with 34 kids alone.
Plus, Steve loved his job, worked hard to be a teacher, and hated missing a day if he didn’t need to.
“Maybe you could bring Robin here after work? I can make dinner?” Eddie’s job was pretty easy, marketing for an Indie record label based out of New York remotely really kept him busy for a couple hours a day and the rest of the time was spent writing his own music.
Steve sat up and looked down at him, his hair ruffled from Eddie running his fingers through it for the last eight hours.
“You’d wanna meet Robin?”
“Yeah, if you want me to. She sounds like fun.”
Steve started crying.
“Oh shit, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to make you cry. Good job, Munson, already ruined something good,” Eddie was reaching for a tissue from his bedside table.
“No, no, I’m sorry. I’m just tired and emotional. And just. It means a lot that you’d wanna meet her,” Steve said between gasps for air as he continued to cry.
“Of course I do. I could even invite Gareth over, too, if you want. He won’t believe that our date went well,” Eddie joked, brushing the tears away from Steve’s cheeks.
“I’d love to meet him,” Steve said, sniffling.
“When can you guys get here?”
“Usually we’re done by four, but sometimes we stay later to finish grading stuff. Maybe we should say six?”
“Got it. Any allergies?”
“Robin is allergic to shellfish. She says she is. I think she just doesn’t like them,” Steve rolled his eyes.
“No shellfish, got it. Any preferences, my love?”
Steve blushed at the term of endearment, looking down before he leaned in to kiss Eddie softly.
“Anything you make will be great.”
“You wanna borrow some clothes for work?” Eddie asked.
“Do you have any business casual stuff?”
Eddie gagged.
“Unfortunately, it’s required for the job sometimes. Far left of the closet should have something,” he nodded towards the small closet by the bathroom.
Eddie watched as Steve walked over and picked out his only pair of khaki pants and a navy button down. Steve looked back at him and winked before he nodded towards the bathroom.
“Could use some help working the shower if you’re willing to,” he smirked.
Eddie jumped up from the bed and ran into the bathroom, ignoring the way Steve was laughing.
“The hot water is tricky sometimes. I should probably get in there too to make sure it stays hot,” Eddie said as he stripped off his pants.
“Definitely. Wouldn’t want me to get cold,” Steve put a hand on his shoulder to slow him down. “Kiss me?”
Eddie leaned in to kiss him slowly, letting his tongue brush along his lips just to get a taste.
“Okay?” Eddie checked in.
“Yeah. You remember what you said last night? About loving me like I deserve?”
Eddie nodded.
“I want you to. And I want to love you back.”
“I think we can arrange that.”
801 notes · View notes