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boysplanetrecaps · 1 year

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Boys Planet Episode 3-4 Recaps: Back Door

If you’re following the MNET show Boys Planet, you probably know by now that the editors are extremely irritating. For a song “mission” like this, they show 2-3 minute montages of some of the teams practicing, then fast forward to show time passing, then make it look like the performance will start any moment, and then have a lengthy flashback before we finally get to see the performance.

So, I made a main recap that takes you through episodes 3 and 4 in a linear way, but then when it comes to focusing on each team, I’ll put all those thoughts in a separate post so you can keep the storylines straight. This post is the Back Door teams’ rehearsal and performance.

The Teams

K team:

Leader: Kim Ji Woong

Other members: Han Yu Jin, Ji Yun Seo, Kim Min Seong, Kim Tae Rae, Kum Jun Hyeon, Yoon Jong Woo

Han Yu Jin is likely familiar to you. He’s 15 and is part of that team that auditioned with Kick It, who all got 4 stars and later all dropped to 3 stars. He also is the tiny sickly baby who had a horrible fever for days and the show just let him keep working.

You probably also recognize 24-year-old Kim Ji Woong. He is a noted BL (boy love) genre actor, and auditioned with Mirotic (with a BL concept).

In the first episode, Ji Woong was ranked 2nd and Yu Jin 3rd; in the second episode, they switched rankings. But obviously they’re both extremely popular.

Yoon Jong Woo, age 22 and wearing a headband today, is the one who pretended to kiss Kim JiWoong during the star level test. Jongwoo auditioned with him in Mirotic, was ranked 73 and then 67, and dropped spectacularly from 3 stars, to 2 stars, to 1 star when the judges reassessed the Star Level Test results by reviewing the video.

Ji Yun Seo, age 18, was also on that Kick It team with YuJin (in fact, he was the leader), but is a lot less popular. He was ranked 86th at the end of episode 1, but flew up to 53rd for episode 2. Like his teammates, he dropped from 4 stars to 3.

Kim Min Seong, 19, auditioned with NuNu NaNa. He was ranked 78th and then 79th, and was an all star at first but dropped to 3 stars.

Kum Jun Hyeon, 19, is my little cousin (not really!) and a noted yeller. He also auditioned with NuNu NaNa and has been an all star the whole time.

Kim Tae Rae, 20, performed in my favorite audition, The Real, as the main vocal. He’s so good, so I’m happy to report he’s popular -- ranked 9th and then 12th. He was a 3 star and lifted himself to 4 stars -- yay Tae Rae! I mean, yae!

G team:

Leader: Na Kamden

Other members: Ricky, Brian, Chen Jian Yu, Feng Jun Lan, Krystian, Zhang Shuaibo

You will likely recognize many of the members of this team.

Ricky is often seen, but rarely heard. He has a distinctive look and a sort of presence to him. He’s only 18, despite looking older; he was ranked 12th and then 13th; his audition with Kick It (G) earned him 3 stars but then he fell to 2.

Brian auditioned with Ricky, and earned 3 stars but then fell to 1. He’s 20, Canadian-Chinese, and was ranked 37th and then 28th.

Chen Jian Yu and Krystian auditioned with Call Me Baby.

Chen Jian Yu is 24, was ranked 28th and then 34th, and has been a 1 star the whole time. Incidentally, he has light purple hair now.

Krystian is 23, was ranked 21 and then 23, and has been a 2 star the whole time. He’s been on other survival shows and came into this one with a bit of a following.

Feng Jun Lan is 23, was ranked 92nd and then 89th (oofta), and has been a 2 star the whole time. He auditioned with God’s Menu, and fwiw, I thought he did a lot better than the rest of his team and deserved 3 stars.

Zhang Shuaibo auditioned on the very tall Reveal team. That team had a rough time and it was hard to see who was best or worst, but I thought Zhang Shuai Bo might have been the strongest on the team. He’s 20, was ranked 22nd and then 32nd, and has been a 1 star the whole time.

Na Kamden auditioned with Rush Hour, with Jay. Jay got all the focus, but I thought Kamden did a good job as well, and he got 3 stars, where he stayed. He’s 21, was ranked 82nd and then jumped all the way to 37th.

So, this team has 5 Chinese members and one Chinese-Canadian member who speaks Chinese. Kamden is the only one who doesn’t speak Chinese on this team. This will become A Major Issue.

Team Selection:

This was the 2nd K-team chosen, and Kim Ji Woong did the choosing.

This was the 4th G-team chosen, though I’m not sure who did the choosing.

Episode 3, 1:10:50

Part Selection

On the K-side, we see that the team has chosen Mr. Sexy BL Kim Ji Woong leader, at least in part because he chose the team, and he immediately says that he is just the mediator (“okay!”) and has no power (“okay!”) and that he’s just a listener (“okay!”) and that their opinions are more valuable than his (“congratulations!”).

They all admit openly that they want the killing part, which is huge. My little cousin and noted yeller Kum Jun Hyeon says he’s always been an all star; formerly sickly baby Han Yu Jin says that when he was center (for Kick It) his whole team were made all stars, leaving out the part where they all dropped to 3 stars later. Yoon Jong Woo really really wants the center, too, and does a good mini audition for his team so wins the part, winning votes from Kim Ji Woong, Kim Tae Rae, Kum Jun Hyeon, and even Yujin’s Kick It teammate, Ji Yeon Seo. Oh, burn!

Somehow, Tae Rae ends up sub-vocal 1 -- I don’t get it, he’s a really great vocalist. Ji Yun Seo ends up the main vocal, and I mean, he does have a decent singing voice, but Tae Rae is spectacular, so I’m so confused. Maybe sub-vocal 1 has the toughest high notes or something.

Yujin ends up with a small part, and interviews that he has no confidence. It’s almost as if he’s recently been the victim of horrible emotional abuse while being pushed past his physical limits.

Over on team G…

Left to right: Na Kamden, Chen Jian Yu, Ricky, Zhang Shuaibo, Brian, Krystian, Feng Jun Lan.

Again, we can see that Chen Jian Yu has dyed his hair light blue sometime after the initial audition.

They all say that they think Na Kamden would be a good leader -- maybe because he’s the only 3 star on the team -- and he says he thinks he could be a good leader. But the team is slow to pick their positions, and when Kamden tries to get everyone to try for the Killing Part, Krystian pushes back, and speaks Chinese while doing so. Kamden is left in the dark, but also doesn’t advocate for himself. Like, just say “please use either English or Korean or even hand gestures -- I don’t understand Chinese.” Kamden asks in English, “What are you guys talking about right now?” but gets literally no answer. And Kamden just sits there feeling worse and worse but doesn’t seem to do much about it. Why are so many people so passive? It makes life more difficult.

I’m just going to tell a super quick story and you can skip this paragraph if you don’t care. I was once on a big city metro train with a friend and I asked her to hold my coffee for me while I took off my coat. She agreed, and then almost immediately put my coffee down on the floor of the train while she took off her own coat. When I said, “woah, you put my coffee on the floor?” she said “well, I had to take off my own coat.” Here’s the thing: Say so right away. When I ask you if you can hold my coffee, say, “one moment, let me take off my own coat first,” and then take off your coat, you know? Just say what’s on your mind. Don’t make me the bad guy by passively agreeing to something you don’t want to do, but then get mad at me for having asked, and get back at me by putting my coffee on the floor of a disgusting metro train. I mean, I drank the rest anyway but you know what I mean. And no, that girl and I are no longer friends, thank god.

What I’m saying is that both Kamden and Krystian are problems here, in different ways. Krystian should have admitted he wanted to be leader, since it seems obvious to me that he wanted that. He also should absolutely not been speaking Chinese constantly, since Kamden doesn’t understand it. But Kamden should have spoken up about the language thing, since it’s not impossible that Krystian didn’t remember in the moment that Kamden doesn’t speak Chinese. I’ve encountered that before -- people who speak their own language to me and just expect me to understand somehow. Also, why is Brian not speaking up? As a Chinese-Canadian, I think he could have been an excellent translator between Kamden and the rest of the team, but as far as we can see, he barely opens his mouth….

But that’s also only as far as we can see.

I also want to say that this has been edited so much that it’s basically fiction at this point. Maybe Brian was constantly piping up with translations. Maybe Krystian was repeating whatever he said in Chinese, moments later, in English. Maybe this whole scene was 10 minutes long in real life and then they moved on. We have no way to know. And yeah, maybe Krystian is a jerk, and maybe Kamden is the bullied victim. We don’t know.

We do know that Kamden had a rough time, and my heart goes out to him, no matter what the specific facts of the encounter are.

They’re all so stressed out. And language difficulties can make you feel like you’re trapped alone inside your own head. We’re social creatures anyway, as a species, and communication is our biggest line of defense and one of our most fundamental instincts. Seriously, it's an instinct. Put a group of children together who don't know a language at all, they'll make one up together and teach it to their own children someday. Communication is essential to us, so being with other human beings but not being able to actually talk to them in the language of your heart affects you emotionally so much more than you can know unless you’ve been through that. MNET should have given every single G-group a translator, or at the very least a translator app or some dictionaries or some fucking thing. So if you’re tempted to think that Krystian is the evilest of villains here, remember at all times that MNET is the real villain.

Now, we skip to 54:41 in Episode 4.

It’s performance time! Everyone is excited. Even the G-group members are excited to watch the K-group perform. Not a great sign for G-group.

Stylist noonas were like, “Let’s give K-group some sexy black outfits, and then let’s saddle G-group with white outfits that make them look puffy instead of sleek and make it hard to see them dancing. That’s fair, right?”

The K-group introduces itself one by one, and does a bit of aegyo for the crowd. We don’t get to hear from Ji Yun Seo or Kim Min Seong, because why would we?

I just love Kim Tae Rae.

“I went from Church Oppa with glasses, to cool idol without glasses.”

On the G-side, Ricky says, in English, “Ladies and Gentlemen. Sit back and enjoy the show.” Ok, three things.

He could have just said “ladies.” I don’t think there’s a single dude there.

There are several many women in the audience who are obsessed hardcore with Ricky and you can hear them screaming for him loudly by name.

Ricky is wearing huge goggles and I guess it’s a look but it looks dumb and also uncomfortable and if it were me I’d be begging to take them off my head.

Anyway, time for a flashback.

At vocal rehearsal, when Tae Rae sings, with that strong and lovely vocal color of his, Solji’s head pops up in surprise. Solji sort of gently asks about why Ji Yun Seo was made the main vocal instead of Kim Tae Rae and we flashback to the voting. It was 3 to 2 in favor of Ji Yun Seo, and it’s not as if Ji Yun Seo is a bad vocalist, so he got it.

Thing is, though, that Kim Tae Rae is an excellent vocalist, and I wish his team had had a bit of leadership and chutzpah enough for someone to speak up and say, “For the good of the team, we should let TaeRae belt and use YunSeo as a lead vocalist.” Because I’m telling you -- TaeRae is wasted here.

I also think that this was partially about friendship. Kum Jun Hyeon and Kim Min Seong are agency co-trainees, and are likely to vote together; they were all together in All Stars with Ji Yun Seo, while Tae Rae was still in three stars. Then Min Seong and Yun Seo were together in three stars, further solidifying their friendship. So Jun Hyeon and Min Seong are probably better friends with Yun Seo (and each other) than they are with Tae Rae, and may have let their friendship influence their vote. Just my conspiracy theory of the day.

The judges know that Tae Rae is better suited for main vocal, but it’s not as if YunSeo is doing a bad job, so the judges sort of shrug and say, “Well, if that’s what you decided,” but it’s clear they can’t believe that this team is wasting an obvious main vocalist. It’d be like if you had Chen and Xiumin from EXO on your team, and you made Xiumin your main vocal. Xiumin has a lovely sweet voice, but he’s not CHEN. I realize that if you’re not an EXO-L what I’m saying may not make sense.

Ok, it’d be like if you made Lisa your main vocal instead of Rosé, or if you made Sana your main vocal instead of Jihyo, or if you made Minhyuk your main vocal instead of Kihyun, or if you made Taeyong your main vocal instead of Doyoung, or if you made V your main vocal instead of Jungkook, or if you made Jackson the main vocal instead of JB, or if you made Sullyoon your main vocal instead of Lily, or if you made J-US your main vocal instead of Hyojin, or if you made Moonbyul your main vocal instead of Solar, or if you made Irene your main vocal instead of Wendy. I guess I should stop now. But like, what if you made Amber the main vocal instead of Luna? Or made G-dragon your main vocal instead of Daesung? Or made Minho the main vocal instead of Onew? Or made Soyou the main vocal instead of Hyolin? Or made Seola the main vocal instead of Younjung? Or made Eunha your main vocal instead of Yuju?

At dance practice, Jong Woo and Min Seung get praised -- the judge asks why JongWoo is a just a one star if he’s this good, which is a nice compliment -- but Han Yujin gets dragged hard. The judge even says that he’s ruining the performance.

Watching this whole bit after watching the storyline from the “Burn It Up” team, where the 15 year olds had emotional meltdowns and had to be given some love and care from their older members, it really strikes me how incredibly mature and hard working Yujin is. It’s almost to his detriment, though, because if he just let it show how badly he was hurting, someone might help him. As it is, he just suffers and swallows his tears, and I’m worried about his mental health.

His team knows he needs a boost, so they rearrange the choreography to bring him closer to the front at certain key points, and it makes him feel genuinely supported. (It’s also probably a good idea since he’s so popular and will get a lot of votes for the team so why not shove him to the front and grab the audience vote as much as you can?)

And what do you know -- boosting a literal child’s confidence helps him more than beating him down with insults! Imagine that. Han Yujin is a really hard working kid and he stays in the practice room trying over and over and over until he nails the choreo -- probably at times when other people are asleep, because there’s no one else there from either team.

At 1:01:20 the performance begins. Everyone’s so excited, even the judges.

Do I have to tell you that this performance is awesome? I think you know that. The whole time I kept thinking how much better it would have been with Tae Rae as the main vocal, but other than that, perfect.

Yun Seo did a great job as a vocalist, in his own right. I’m not dinging him for not being TaeRae -- he would have been so good as sub vocal 1, holding down the melody and keeping the group on track. He has a lot of talent and I feel like he’s going to end up debuting, eventually.

Yoon Jong Woo brought the Hyunjin/Changbin energy. It was a little unexpected but very welcome.

TaeRae did a great job, and boy did he look beautiful. His face is sort of alien but I love it. I didn’t LOVE his extra adlib, but it got attention anyway.

Kim Min Seung does an excellent job throughout; his rapping was bouncy and well enunciated and his dancing looked perfect to me, even the little details. You gotta love how this show, which normally shows every little thing 3x in a row, shows Minseung’s amazing flip/spin thing at the end exactly once, in such a way that I couldn’t figure out who had even done it until I watched all the fancams.

Kim Ji Woong’s ab + nipple reveal worked better for me than you’d think because it fit with the song. A shirt lift like that in the middle of Very Nice or Love Me Right would have been weird, but during the outro of BackDoor, when it’s like you’re at a party and everything is going wild -- it worked.

My little cousin Kum JunHyeon also did great! We knew he would. He did those heel kicks and angular motions and head tilts and all that good stuff and made it look good.

And of course, Han Yujin pulled it out in the end. He’s a talented kid and I see good things ahead for him.

This was obviously fantastic and I am glad that these guys can for the rest of their lives look back at this performance as a time when everything came together for them, and even if they don’t debut, or if they end up in some nugu group that disbands after one song or something, they can look back and say, “That was great, and I was great in it.”

I love how most of the judges afterward are like, “I didn’t know that Tae Rae sang that well?” And Master Lee, the main vocal judge, is like “No, he sings really well, you unobservant dumb dumbs, how did you not know that?” And I’m at home shouting YES WHY DID YOU EVER PUT HIM IN THREE STARS, YOU ABSOLUTE DUMB DUMBS?

So yeah, they were awesome. Check out their Studio Choom performance if you haven’t already.

After that performance, I feel bad for G-group, who has to go up there and perform knowing that they already lost. Back stage, they can only applaud and shake their heads, and Brian says, “They did a good job.” I mean, who can deny it?

Left to right: Brian, Chen Jian Yu, Zhang Shuaibo, Ricky, Krystian, Feng Jun Lan, Na Kamden

It’s time for G-group to perform, so of course it’s really time for a flashback.

They’re in dance rehearsal with Master Psycho, and he tells them he’s not sure that Krystian should be doing the killing part, because Krystian is too feminine and thus weak. I’m not sure that Kristian is feminine, or maybe I’m not sure what the word “feminine” means in this context or why that’s a negative thing. But I can agree that Krystian doesn’t quite nail it as center.

Afterwards, Kamden raises the issue of redistributing the parts. They’re talking to each other in English -- at least, we see Kamden, Ricky, Brian, and Krystian speaking English to each other. Krystian says, “I just feel like it’s not necessary, like, why are we doing this [talking about switching parts]?” But Chen Jian Yu, who now has light purple hair, says in Chinese to Krystian, “I agree with Kamden. We need to improve.” Ricky speaks up, in Chinese, to say “We must win.” They talk about it some more, and a lot of the convo is in Chinese, leaving Kamden out, but maybe they’re stopping to let someone translate for Kamden sometimes. It becomes clear that Krystian is just genuinely hurt, on a human level. “You guys don’t trust me?” he asks, and I think that’s what matters to him more than possibly losing his part -- it’s losing his teammate’s trust that hurts. I can get that. He says, in English, “Please don’t rip this out of me.” Aww, that hurts. 🙁 All the more so since his words impact us more since he’s speaking English.

The next day, Kamden, Ricky, and Krystian practice the killing part. Ricky has put himself forward not as someone who is better than Krystian, but as someone better than K-group, and I think that’s a diplomatic way to say it. Krystian keeps saying “I hope you trust me.”

They each try, and honestly it seems obvious that Ricky has to do it. The four other members talk together…

And choose Ricky.

Krystian does his best to smile and be gracious, but you can tell he’s upset.

Afterward, during rehearsal, Krystian is grouchy and trying to unofficially rearrange the choreo to in the center more often, stuff like that. It means he’s bumping into people and sort of ruining the stage picture. Kamden loses patience and begins snapping at his teammates a bit.

Later, back at the dorms, Kamden goes to talk to some of his friends on other teams, including some K-members. I guess the dorms aren’t completely segregated. I think that Kamden and Seok Matthew are probably pretty friendly, as they’re both North American, and I get the impression that Matthew organized the meeting. So Matthew is there, Hui is there, Han Yu Jin is there, Lee Yedam is there, a few others who I can’t recognize in the lighting.

Kamden is basically asking for advice, and Hui tells him, “I personally think that if you let things go as a leader, you will lose.” They all tell him not to give up, to put on a good performance.

Meanwhile, G-group members, absent Ricky and Krystian, are talking. Feng Jun Lan says, “As a leader, Kamden tried to talk to us gently. I think that’s why he couldn’t talk directly to us.” Brian, another North American, says, “Kamden actually wants our team to do well.” Chen Jian Yu says, “How great would it be if the team got along well?” They resolve to talk to Kamden tomorrow.

So, they have a meeting.

Kamden says he feels like he’s not really the leader. Chen Jian Yu says he is going to follow Kamden’s lead. Kamden asks for more enthusiastic following of his lead, and they all say yes.

Kamden interviews that he feels like it had been a waste of time to sit int he corner and feel sad, and yeah, dude, it was.

It’s performance time, and you can clearly hear the Ricky fans screaming at the beginning.

They all do their best, but there’s no way they could ever quite measure up to the other team. Ricky does really suit his part, but for me he’s still a bit stiff. They’re all a little stiff somehow, doing choreography instead of dancing. They don’t have chemistry with each other on stage they way you need to for this song. It feels like they’re rushing sometimes, too. It’s a bummer because again, they’re not specifically bad in any way, except for poor Feng Jun Lan, whose vocals are in bad condeeshon. I think they can all be pretty proud that they put in a good stage. They were just beaten by a team full of guys who are actually ready to debut.

In the MNET editing, they focus a lot on Ricky, and I guess I just don’t really see it. I don’t know why those women are so obsessed? He’s not bad or anything, he definitely has a certain magnetism, but I wouldn’t fly all the way to Korea to see him perform. I don't think I'd fly to Korea to see any of these trainees perform, though.

Backstage, the K-team says kind things about the performance. Kim Tae Rae says they were “the best team so far” and I think he means the best of the G-teams, and that very well may be true. But everyone knows that K-team dominated.

The Results

Main Rapper

K: Kim Min Seong 28

G: Chen Jian Yu 27

Main Vocal

K: Ji Yun Seo 8

G: Feng Jun Lan 6

Sub Rapper 1

K: Kum Jun Hyeon 21

G: Krystian 8

Sub Vocal 1

K: Kim Tae Rae 63

G: *Ricky* 80

Sub Rapper 2

K: *Yoon Jong Woo* 50

G: Zhang Shuaibo 38

Sub Rapper 3

K: Kim Ji Woong 259

G: Na Kamden 19

Sub Vocal 2

K: Han Yu Jin 122

G: Brian 26

Final score, 551 to 204.

You can tell that Ricky had hoped for more votes than just 80.

Brian knew that Han Yu Jin would get a lot of votes, but even so, his various expressions, as he takes it all in, are great.

Poor Na Kamden -- I wouldn’t want to be considered a competitor for Kim Ji Woong and his nipples. I also feel bad for Ji Yun Seo, who did a decent job but just was in the wrong position. I actually think he would have gotten more votes if he and Tae Rae had switched parts. Krystian is miserable with his score, and probably blames the part distribution, but I think there was no saving this. Zhang Shuaibo has a decent fan base for a sort of low ranked foreign member, gotta say.

K-team does a cheer for their leader and standard bearer.

Over on Team G, they try to comfort and congratulate each other. They’re glad that they ended up reconciling and working together as a team, when all is said and done.

Kamden says that he thinks his team did really well and he’s proud of them.

And that brings us the end of this segment and this recap!

To go back to the main recap, click here.

To go on to Hot Sauce click here.

#boys planet recaps #Ricky #boys planet #ricky boys planet #boys planet 999 #boysplanet #MNET #Na Kamden #han yujin #kim jiwoong #seok matthew #bp999

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baenxietydad · 5 months

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we should take a walk, and look at all the flowers

they're homosexuals, your honor

there was the shitpost one, now the gross and cute one

Slow Burn - Kacey Musgraves

In Tennessee, the sun's goin' down But in Beijing, they're headin' out to work You know the bar down the street don't close for an hour We should take a walk and look at all the flowers

It's giving Hatfish on their silly little forest walks, Mu-yeol pointing out every edible or medicinal plant and Hatter's just like

and the song in general is about kinda gradually coming to love someone, very gross, very sweet

Lover Boy - Phum Viphurit

Time and toys may fill my heart with joy I'll know peace when I'm your lover boy I'll be your new school soul Silver and gold New desire Friends on fire Call me, "Lover boy" ... Darling, I got my trust issues Warning, you stay away

You Are Mine - The Avett Brothers

You are mine The edge I need when I am out of line The air I breathe when I believe I'm dying I guess you are there

We're So In Tune - Kississippi

I'm feeling kinda dizzy Getting tender for you No drama, you just bring My heart so close to Passing it's limitations It's such a bad design It's not an invitation I gotta catch my ride

Playing the same song Like I'm playing my cool Hard not to fall in love when We're so in tune

This song is go girlypop but it is unfortunately also the most Hatfish song to ever Hatfish

남자가 사랑할 때 (Man In Love) - Infinite

But like, specifically I need you to listen to Kim Tae-rae of Zerobaseone sing the part after the rap verse on Boys Planet because that's good stuff right there

Like a young child, I keep laughing for no reason I control myself by saying that I’m different from others

When a man’s in love, he wants to stay by your side There’s always so much he wants to do for you When I’m in love, I want to give everything in my life to you With just one expectation, your heart When I’m in love

Look carefully – if you feel this, that means he’s fallen for you

And you thought I wasn't gonna find a way to put K-pop on here

Everywhere, Everything - Noah Kahan

Drive slowly, I know every route in this county Maybe that ain't such a bad thing I'll tell you where not to speed

It's been a long year and all of our book's pages dog-eared We write out the ends on our palms, dear Then forget to read

We'll Never Have Sex - Leith Ross

Oh, you kissed me just to kiss me Not to take me home It was simple, it was sweetness It was good to know

You look perfect, you look different I don't wonder about your indifference If I said you could never touch me You'd come over and say I looked lovely

...

Depollute me, gentle angel And I'll feel the sickness less and less Come and kiss me, pretty baby Like we'll never have sex

I could actually write a thesis paper about how this 1:39 long song is Hatfish af.

Drink The River - Gabe Lee

And I can't drink the river to dry the land Bury the ocean beneath the sand But I can love you Until the tide pulls me under by and by

Rain On My Tin Roof - Seth Avett

And if there were ever a reason to stay Turn off my phone and become one with you and my bed It's the rain on my tin roof

The amount of times Hatter has to remind him he needs money for Nemo's tuition to keep him from calling out of work tbh

200% - Akdong Musician

MORE K-pop for the masses

It must be L.O.V.E 200% sure of that I want you really I mean really Really, I like you and my reddening face is evidence for that

Canon that Akmu is some of the Korean music Mu-yeol will try to get Hatter into lmao

Around Your Room - Kississippi

Throw your heart at me, I'm a sucker for you That's something that you might say and confidentially I'm a sucker for you too 'cause my heart's stuck that way Nothing's gonna change, gotta love that belly ache

This song makes me so FERAL about Hatfish, particularly this lyric

Steady when you are around me A babe in the woods for legitimate longing

Excuse me??? "A babe in the woods for legitimate longing" in your 40s and 50s because someone wants to love you, I'm weak

Twin Human Highway Flares - The Mountain Goats

Can't believe y'all thought there wouldn't be a Mountain Goats song, wow, that's clown behavior.

Sunset spilling through your earrings all over your body When we shut the motel room door behind us, we knew we'd hit the motherlode On the day that I forget you, I hope my heart explodes

Chateau Lobby #4 - Father John Misty

People are boring But you’re something else I can’t explain ...

First time, you let me stay the night despite your own rules You took off early to go cheat your way through film school You left a note in your perfect script: "Stay as long as you want," and I haven’t left your bed since

The Genius breakdown of the lyrics is *chef's kiss*

Strawberry Queen - Charles Wesley Godwin

Felt like Adam next to Eve staring at a fruit of God So I wrapped a bow around my heart and placed it in a box of cherry wood I asked her if she could take that box and do it good She smiled and said she would

*inhales* Okay, listen, the VIBE is more fitting than the actual lyrics of the song, let me explain. The singer is from West Virginia, he's a proud Appalachian man, and his wife who he wrote the song about is from Florida. He wrote this song about how he never, ever thought he could be with someone that wasn't also from the mountains, not from his culture/background, who didn't understand.

And that very much parallels Hatfish! Mu-yeol never would have thought he'd pursue someone who checked all three of these boxes: A. from the West, B. a human, and C. most importantly, a sorcerer. Sorcerers and fairies have MAD beef in Korea, sorcerers were barely on his radar to interact with back in Korea let alone befriend and catch feelings for. So yes, this is on here for how perfectly the song's energy matches!

Bring Your Love to Me - The Avett Brothers

Bring your love to me I will hold it like a dandelion One I want to save, one I want to keep From the breeze that follows me and no one else I can only stand here still And I can only hope you will Keep me in focus long enough to tell I'm trying to help

#i'm so emotional about how mu-yeol's cultural foods are at the center of them catching feelings that it's in the aesthetic lmao #r: hatfish

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maplecornia · 3 years

Text

chapter 19

𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔠𝔬𝔲𝔫𝔱: 2.93K

𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶: You watched them from the sidelines ever since you were a young teenage girl. Now you’re grown up, they’ve returned after 2 long years and everything has changed. What happens when you pull back the mask and find the darkness within? What happens when you see that they’re broken?

𝔞/𝔫: when it's 5 am in the morning, you kind of start to lose inspiration for banners ;-;

When you step out into the rain, you feel a bit sad, shutting the door behind you. Smiling to yourself, you sigh, trying to find Taehyung through the tinted windows, your hand lingering on the door.

You don’t want to leave, you want to hold onto him for a bit longer. Somehow, you know that if you say goodbye now, things will stay the same, you will stay the same.

Broken as you've always been.

He’s lost behind the dark, and you have to let go, turning away.

You can’t rely on him. You can’t let your burdens rest on his shoulders, you have to figure out how to solve them on your own. Nevertheless, the temptation is there. To lose yourself in the fantasy of bliss and happiness dancing in the rain.

What happens when you finally let go?

You don’t want to find out.

Inwardly, you try to swallow the lump in your throat as you leave him behind, holding tightly to the bittersweet memories he has given you.

Smiling softly to yourself, you lift your satchel to cover your head, shielding you from the rain like a little umbrella, only a few feet away from the apartment complex door. Glancing to your left, you receive a pang of nostalgia as you recognize the small bench where you waited for Jaejin before.

Was it only yesterday that you came to Korea?

You find it so hard to believe that in a mere span of 24 or so hours, so much has already happened and yet you're here.

The same as before.

You scoff a bit to yourself, finding how pathetic that is. You know you have to change, that you have to fix yourself, and find it sad that you can't seem to do it alone. The only moments where you start to feel okay are moments like today, where others can distract you and give you their strength.

Is that all you're capable of being?

A parasite that leeches off of other's happiness?

You are weak, aren’t you?

Turning away, you start to resume your trek to the safety of your apartment, your new home but pause at the sound of someone shouting behind you.

"Wait!"

It's a familiar voice, and frantic. Curious, and a bit worried, you turn around, trying to find the source of the sound. It takes you a moment to peer through the rain, but soon you can see a figure stepping out of a sleek black car that is parked on the curb.

The same car that dropped you off just moments ago.

Why hasn't he left yet?

Furrowing your brow with confusion, you step forward, but then you see him.

As the figure turns towards you, even from this distance, you’re still able to recognize his face. Why wouldn’t you, when you have been looking at it, memorizing it, adoring it throughout the 5 years you have known him? His eyes glint as they meet yours across the way and he calls out your name once more, leaving you frozen, speechless.

“Wait for me!”

Kim Taehyung, little do you know, I have been waiting for you all my life.

He starts running towards you. Through the rain, splashing through puddles, getting drenched all over again. Not even bothering to pull up his hood as he runs to reach you, his eyes never leave your gaze, braving the monster that is the storm.

You shake your head almost in disbelief as he comes to a stop before you, drenched from head to toe. He’s dripping almost as much as the clouds around you, his hair now plastered to his face. The rain has turned it from its normal dark brown shade to a deep pitch black. His clothes stick tightly to his body from the rain, all efforts to dry off in the car now futile. He shivers a bit from the cold, his teeth slightly chattering as he stands before you, those eyes boring into yours.

He must be so uncomfortable, so cold, and yet…

His eyes can’t stop shining.

You look up at him, half stunned.

“Thank goodness you heard me. I thought I would have to chase you inside.” He says, chuckling to himself. Stunned, you are frozen, your eyes wide and searching his. He notices the strange expression and tilts his head, confused.

“What is it?” he asks, but you don’t answer. He looks left and right as though he weren't the cause of your stare before bending forward and whispering…

“Do I have something on my face?”

At his question, you can’t help but chuckle.

“Yes.” You nod, lowering your satchel to rest by your hip once more and reaching around his neck, pulling the now soaked and heavy fabric of hood up to cover his head. “You have quite a few things on your face.”

Before pulling away, you can't help but absentmindedly brush a bit of his hair out of his face, your hand resting on his cold but soft cheek. He doesn’t complain, just stares at you with wide expectant eyes. His hands itch to raise and keep your comforting hand there on his cheek, but he’s too late as you slowly pull away, meeting those dark mysterious eyes.

“What were you doing?” You ask, raising a hand to shield your eyes to see him better and he stands straight, clearing his throat.

“I never got your name.” He says quite plainly, shocking you a bit.

“You came out here...for my name?” you ask, quite incredulously. “I’m sorry I--”

You’re cut off, by the hand that he holds out to you, a smirk playing on his lips.

“I’m Kim Taehyung, what’s your name?” Taking his hand after a moment, you shake it.

“My name is Lin Yen, it’s nice to meet you.” You reply and he smiles broadly, his eyes seeming to shine with a million stars.

"Was that all?” You ask him, having to raise your voice over the growing torrent of rain.

“Hardly.” He murmurs under his breath, so soft that you can't hear him. Squinting your eyes at him, you push your hair away from your face, the wind playing with it violently.

“What did you say?” You call out to him, wincing as another howl of wind shrieks in your ear. He doesn’t respond, just turns to you and holds out his hand. You give him an incredulous look, thinking he wants another handshake, but he smiles, shaking his head slightly.

“Give me your phone.” he requests, and you sigh in exasperation.

“Tae, we're in the middle of a storm, I don't--”

“I don’t care.” He says, cutting you off and you regard him in silence. “Besides, you're short enough that I could be your umbrella. So you don’t have to be so worried about the rain.” You raise your eyebrow at his statement, a bit offended. He notices your expression, but at the sight of it, his smile only grows wider, mischief playing in his eyes.

“You did not just call me short.” You warn him, crossing your arms across your chest as you wait for his response. He rolls his eyes, shrugging a bit before stepping forward, so close that he’s hovering over you.

“Just stating the facts, sweetheart,” Taehyung replies, raising his brow as though asking for a challenge. You narrow your eyes at him, pursing your lips a bit before he smirks and speaks once more. “You’re like a little fairy, and I’m your protective tree.”

He chuckles, sliding his forefinger under your chin before you pull away with a scoff. Just because some people have the biological genes that make them as tall as the freaking sky…

Tired of his incessant teasing, you raise your hand, take his nose within your fingers, and twist it lightly in retaliation, as though you were stealing it from him. He blinks, a bit surprised as you pull away smirking. Holding your thumb between your fore and middle finger, you wave your hand in front of his face, brandishing it as though it were your prize before turning on your heel and walking away.

“Come on, Mr. Tree.” You call over your shoulder and after a moment, he follows you. When you reach the small overhang above the entrance to your apartment complex, you stop and turn around to him, no longer bare to the storm. Giving him a triumphant smile, you turn to your satchel, slightly humming to yourself. “Looks like you don’t have to be an umbrella anymore.”

“Your loss, for your information I am an excellent tree.” He scoffs, rolling his eyes before resting his hands behind his neck and peeking into your apartment complex. The doors are glass, so it's not hard to see through and as you glance up from your tiny task, you smile at how cute and innocent his expression seems. When your hands finally close around your phone, you let out a small gasp of excitement, startling him. He jumps, his hands falling and resting on his chest as though to try and calm his pounding heart. Pulling it out of your satchel, you try your hardest not to burst out into laughter at the sight of his surprised expression.

“You okay there, Mr. Leafalot?” You ask and he scoffs, a bit annoyed, his soft lips pursing into a small pout.

“For one thing, I have no idea what that means.” You bite back on your laugh, snorting a bit as you raise your hand to hide your ever-growing smile.

“For another, I am perfectly fine, thank you.” Scoffing, he rubs the back of his neck glancing away from you for a moment.

“Honestly, I don't need a clumsy Tinker Bell telling me to be careful.” You roll your eyes, deciding to ignore the slight taunt he just directed your way.

“Whatever, Peter Pan.” You shoot back, earning a slightly surprised look from him. He opens his mouth to reply but you cut him off, holding your phone out to him. He looks at it, then back at you, a question waiting in his eyes. After a moment, you grow tired of waiting and sigh, lagging your arm a bit. “Didn’t you ask to see my phone?”

His eyes light with realization and he nods as though he has forgotten why he was there. He takes the phone from you, your fingers brushing against his before you draw away. As he glances at your home screen, he smirks.

“So...am I your bias?”

You glance up at him, a bit confused by his question, but then you realize.

He has your phone.

The same phone that has him...

On your home screen.

As your wallpaper.

Inwardly, you curse, trying to ignore the blush rising in your cheeks, and lunge forward, trying to take it back. He laughs, dodging and holding your phone out of your reach.

“What's wrong, Tinker?” he antagonizes, grinning like an idiot as he blocks you with his arm.

Curse your tiny arms.

“Taehyung!” you whine, the embarrassment clean on your face. He just laughs, his fingers playing on your screen doing God knows what as he holds you back. You droop on his arm, pouting as he shows no signs of pulling away, nor giving the phone back.

“What did you even need it for?” you complain, slipping off of his arms and crossing your arms once more. Having finished, he turns back to you, smirking. You tilt your head a bit confused as he hands you your phone. Cautiously, you take it, wondering what he’s done.

“See for yourself.” He instructs.

As soon as you see it, your eyes widen.

He opened your contacts and entered one, the new contact set up and filling your screen. On it, he entered a phone number and titled the contact as Your TaeTae with a purple heart next to it. You breathe out a stunned scoff, before looking up to see him smiling at you. A soft, but innocent smile, which shows his hope and unanswered questions. You smile back, touched at his gesture, and still caught in slight disbelief.

“Is this real?” you ask and he nods. Still unsure, you chuckle a bit shakily turning back to the phone. “I mean, this isn’t your manager's phone number or something…?”

He rolls his eyes before stepping forward and taking your hand into his own, gently cutting you off. You meet his gaze with wide eyes and he holds it with his deep ones before turning back to your phone. You still have your hand around it, the same hand which he holds in his own, a gentle touch that never ceases to fill you with warmth.

You watch as he saves the contact to your phone. Held in beautiful silence, the two of you watch as it registers. Once it's saved, he presses the call button and puts it on speaker just as it starts dialing. It holds out three long beeps before a muffled sound can be heard.

A ringtone echoing from Taehyung's back pocket.

You watch in silence as he pulls it out, holding it next to your phone, an unknown caller ID flashing on his screen. The two of you watch as your soft beeping and his ringtone mix together in a strange symphony. That is, until Tae pulls away, answering the call and holding his phone to his ear. It takes you a moment, but as he softly nudges you, you raise yours to your ear, murmuring a soft response.

“Hello?” He smirks at your faint whisper before replying.

“Hello, is this Tinker Bell?” He asks in the same soft, quiet voice, subtly mocking you. But you catch it, and narrow your eyes at him, playfully smacking him in the arm. He winces, pouting, but you don’t buy it and ignore him.

“It is she, is this Peter Pan?” He wrinkles his nose at the nickname, and you scoff, looking away.

Like Tinker Bell is any better?

“No.” He answers, dropping the mocking voice, his deep silky one returning. At the sound of it, you look up, wondering why he turned so serious all of a sudden. He meets you with those large dark hooded eyes, looking at you with an unreadable expression.

“This is Kim Taehyung.” He takes a step forward, so close you can feel the heat radiating off of him, his smell wafting over you once more.

“This is real.”

You look into his eyes, take in his face, the serene look he holds and everything seems to fade away. There’s only you and him, the rain far away, your troubles falling behind you. There’s only one thing that matters.

After a moment, he slowly smiles, ruffling your hair softly. You flinch, raising your hands to protect your head just as he pulls away.

“I’ll see you later, Tinker Bell.” Stepping back, he raises his hand, waving goodbye before turning on his heel and running off into the rain.

You smile, a bit stunned as you watch him until he rounds the corner around the car and opens the door, looking up at you one last time. You smile, and dramatically wave goodbye to him. He laughs, you can hear it, though it may be faint, as he waves back.

Then he’s gone.

The door closes and you watch the car as it drives away. You stare after it long after it's gone and though you're still smiling, it's almost as though you're returned to your dark and empty self.

As though when he left, he took all the light with him.

Sighing, you shake yourself off.

Now is not the time to lose yourself.

So what if the dream has gone?

You promised yourself you would be strong. You promised yourself not to fall.

So you won’t.

Before you turn away, you look down at your phone, which is still open to Taehyung's contact. You smile at the sight of it, a small sign that what just happened was real, and not a dream. Smiling to yourself, you tap on the empty profile and replace it with the same picture you have on your home screen. Smiling like an idiot, you save the contact changes and are about to turn to the door before you see it.

The option to send him a message.

Licking your lips, you raise your hand to your bottom lip, absentmindedly playing with it as you contemplate whether or not you should do it. After a moment, you press the option and watch in anticipation as it brings you to the empty chat page, waiting for you to type. Biting your bottom lip, your fingers fly across the screen. Sweet and simple, you smile once it's finished, adding a purple heart at the end before pressing SEND. The transaction done, you press your home screen button before turning it to sleep, pocketing the phone safely in your satchel once more.

Taking one last look at the rain, where your dream faded away not a moment ago, you sigh with content before turning on your heel and pushing open the door to enter the apartment complex.

And somewhere amongst that onslaught of endless rain, Taehyung, driving down the slick streets of Seoul, receives your message. He opens it, finding it to belong to an unknown number. But when he reads it, he knows it's you.

Goodbye, Peter Pan

After all, who else would call him that?

Smiling, he sends back a purple heart before pocketing his phone and driving farther and farther away.

And yet…

It’s almost as though he never left.

𝔫𝔬𝔱𝔢: i'm sorry but even though the banner is simple, I'M IN LOVE WITH HIS SMILE OMFG

chapter 20 here

check the Infinite Stars masterlist for more chapters

check my BTS masterlist for other BTS content

check out my masterlist for other kpop fanfics

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joyfulhopelox · 2 years

Note

Please remember that this was written with you in mind so I thought it wouldn't be fair to post it lol, also it's not really good but 🤷‍♀️ Happy reading lovely 💕

Being with Taehyung felt so effortless, you never felt the need to put up a show or uphold an image, because it was clear that Kim Taehyung loved you for you because who wouldn't? You were the wisest person around, alright maybe not, but it seemed that way to the boy as you rambled on about the newest topic that caught your attention on the news that day, he never once complained when you talked about a topic he had no idea about, you could talk for hours on ends in a language Tae didn't know a word of and he'd listen without batting an eyelash, there was just something about the sparkle in your eyes or the movement of your hands as you waved them about that kept him captivated, amused yes, but captivated. You didn't need to wear your best clothes or do your makeup a certain way to have him gaze at you like you held the entire world in your hands. Kim Taehyung was what kids would call, whipped. Hella whipped. But then again, it wasn't a one way thing. How could he not fall for you when you looked at him with such awe in your eyes, he could do the smallest of things in the world and you'd cheer for him so hard that your voice went hoarse. It was impossible not to be immediately smitten by your shy smile or random rambunctious laughter, how you ran around the house singing songs at the top of your voice with the lyrics all wrong. You were so true to yourself, it made him feel hopeful about life when he was down, you made life easier for him and he made it easier for you. Acquaintances would often say how random it was that the two of you met, seemingly worlds apart but almost like it was supposed to happen anyway, like you were fated to be together, pages torn out of the same book finally coming together. Luckily for you, your book had a happy ending.

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 you are too sweet and this was so fluffy and cute it made me cry i love it😭😭😭😭 thank you so much for writing this 💜 it was a rae (the jin in me) of sunshine for me 💜 you have no idea. You are talented and I am so glad to have met you. It’s the sweetest thing i’ve read 😭💜 i’m soft now. I will be crying in a corner now. I want to give you a hug 🥺💜 and also it may be for me but it is your work so please do what you wish with it; post it, expand it, anything. It’s your time and your talent 💜 thank you so much once again lovely.

#rae 🥺💜#the cutest taehyung i’ve ever read #thank you #it was the warmest hug i could receive this winter #😭💜💜💜💜#I’m tearing up

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taehyungsupremacy · 3 years

Text

ult group tag

tagged by @taemaknae thank you nicole!!!

i’m tagging my fronds @filterjimins @mykrokosmos @artsyjoons @flowerkth @sugalou 🤩🤩🤩🤩

rules: answer the following questions for your ult group

this mf is slightly long so it’s going under the cut:

who was your first bias?

- mr. kim taehyung of course

who is your bias now?

- still him, but my bias line has expanded to jimin and yoongi!

what was the first mv you watched by them?

- boy with luv when it first came out

what’s your favorite mv?

- fake love because the vibes are just *chef’s kiss* or mic drop because it goes so hard and the choreo and transitions are so cool

if you could listen to one of their songs for the rest of your life, which would it be?

- oh no this is so hard…..maybe love maze? but anything off ly: tear would be applicable tbh

who would you want to see them collab with?

- harry styles or carly rae jepsen

what mv concept do you want to see them do?

- something futuristic!

have you ever had a dream with any of the members in it?

- one time I dreamt hobi and I were walking somewhere but we kept having to stop because he kept running into people he knew. like we’d be walking down the street and every five seconds someone would be like “hey hobi!” and he’d be like “omg hey!” and talk to them for ages and I was getting so impatient lmao

if you could spend the day with one member, who would it be and what would you do?

- ahhhhh I don’t know, I’d want to spend it with all of them 🥺 but probably tae. we would have a picnic in the park, visit a museum, see a movie, and then go to a cute cafe for coffee (juice for him obvi) and pastries and sit at a table outside in the sun and talk for hours. and then he lets me kiss his nose freckle before we go our separate ways. anyway now I’m yearning so let me stop,,,,,,

which member do you think you’d get along with the best?

- probably yoongi. I think we’re both quiet and reserved at first but very goofy and fun when we’re comfortable with people. plus we both have a similar dry sense of humor and we’re not very good at expressing affection.

which member do you think you would argue with?

- maybe jungkook? he’s a virgo and I’m a sagittarius so our energies would probably clash a little (I know joon is too but he strikes me as a lot more balanced). I’m kind of competitive but I’m bad at everything so I can see that causing some problems lol

if you had to let one member scroll through your tumblr, who would it be?

- I guess taehyung. he might be flattered by my “tete main dancer/rapper/singer” tags…….or he’d just be creeped out.

#about me #this was fun!!!!

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lubdubsworld · 7 years

Text

Something’s Gotta Give. ( Taehyung/Oc)

Chapter 3

“Tae?” I said groggily, lightly reaching out to prod the prone figure on the carpet, still wearing his jacket and suit and curled on the floor , sleeping fitfully. I tried again and he didn’t move. I picked up the two bottles of vodka and grimaced. He was going to feel like hell when he got up.

Sighing, i moved to the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water before setting the kettle to boil. Taehyung had the tolerance of a fifteen year old. I could imagine how he would feel when he woke up. I scratched at the linoleum surface of the counter, trying to dredge up some anger , some annoyance.

But I was drained.

I didn’t hate him. I couldn’t hate him. Yes, he did something awful. Yes, he betrayed me. But, he was still Taehyung.

my Taehyung. I couldn’t hate him.

But i wasn’t an idiot. I would move out. My studio apartment from when i was in college was in Gangnam. Jung Kook crashed there when he wanted some time to himself but i knew he was staying with Yoongi at his penthouse. I would give him a call and then move there , hopefully later in the day. I couldn’t got to my brother or my parents.

They wouldn’t understand.

I grabbed some fennel seeds, sliced up a small ginger root and minced it, before adding a little thyme into the water as well. I let the tea diffuse and sat down on the table, staring into the wall.

“My mariage is over.” I said softly.

The words were oddly loud in the peaceful kitchen.

“Kim Taehyung and i are over. “ I said a bit louder.

It didn’t feel anymore realer. But then, over the past few months, one part of me had known that I was going to end up like this, right? I knew it. Taehyung had been distant, indifferent and hurtful. He had been falling out of love with me.

But falling out of love is ... okay. I could deal with it.

Falling in love with another woman?

Not so much.

“Rae Mi?” His voice startled me badly, and I nearly knocked the glass of water over as I jumped. He was standing in the doorway, looking like hell. I gripped the table to stop myself from rushing over and supporting his swaying frame. The need to touch him was so strong that i wanted to cry. Taehyung had been the most physically affectionate person in the world and as his wife I had been the recipient of nearly 90 % of that affection : the cuddles, the hugs, the impromptu bridal-carries, the inpomptu piggy backing.

“ Sit down. i made tea,.” I said dully.

He groaned and moved to the chair opposite me, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his palms. I stared at him, fondness and sadness and disappointment blooming inside me like a poisonous weed.

What a waste. We could have had it all. We could have been forever. What an utter waste of so many years of love.

“Rae, please... Can we just...” He began, reaching out, but i pulled my hand away.

“I just... Why?” I said softly. I didn’t want to yell.

He gave me a long, miserable look.

“I ... don’t know.” He whispered finally.

I stared at him, feeling frustrated and confused.

“Rae mi, I’ve been so tired these few months , i signed that stupid contract which meant that I couldn’t even come home when i wanted to , and I couldn’t talk to the hyungdeul or even you because i was just so busy! “

I fought the urge to whimper.

“Okay. That’s fine. But Tae, why didn’t you just talk to me? If you wanted out, i would have given you a divorce ! i would have moved out!” I said miserably.

His eyes went wide at that,

“No! That’s not.. That’s not what i want. I don’t want you to leave Rae mi! “

“Of course you don’t. But then, I’m not the one who left, remember? You left... last night when i begged you to stay. And a countless more times before that. “ I pointed out.

He bit his lips.

“Give me one chance. I swear I’ll make...”

“Don’t say it. Don’t you dare say you’ll make it up to me , because there is nothing in the world you can do to make it up to me!” I felt the first sting of tears and tried to get my self under control.

“I’m sorry.” He said and I stood up slowly, grabbing the fine-bone china cps. We’d bought it on our trip to Macau, in a quaint little antique shop, right outside our hotel room. i traced the pretty pink and blue patters on the rim and sighed.

“Stop being sorry. You don’t have to be sorry .” I said finally. “ I mean, yes, you should be sorry for chaeting on me but I won’t blame you for wanting her. She’s ... well she’s Lalisa Manoban. How could I ever compete?” I said dejectedly, pouring the tea into the cup carefully.

Taehyung made a noise of distress and stood up, swaying a bit as he came closer, holding a hand out.

“She doesn’t mean anything to me. She’s just... i don’t even know what she is. i don’t even care... Rae Mi, i know I messed up real bad, but please... please don’t throw this away... Don’t throw away what we have, baby...”

I stared at him in disbelief.

“You did the throwing away. “ I snapped. “ I’m not the one who..”

“I begged you to come with me! I asked you to come with me to Hong kong!!” He shouted.

I froze.

“What?! Are you insane.... Your fans hate me! Every single one of them hates me , you know that!” I hissed. “ Why would i come there ?!”

“See! That’s it,... You care so much about what the fans feel but you don’t care what i feel... i was so fucking lonely and depressed and i just... i just wanted to be able to hold you at the end of the day! And you straight up refused to come with me. You didn’t even ask why. you didn’t even ask me what was bothering me!” He hissed.

I felt myself choke on my own disbelief.

“Are you fucking kidding me! Anytime I did, you kept telling me not to worry and that this was your job !! You did it so many times that i gave up!”

“So, you admit it , then.. You gave up on us, before i cheated on you...”

“Oh, my God, Taehyung are you listening to yourself, right now?!”

“I’m sorry okay?! i fucked up with Lisa.. i don’t.. I don’t even know how that happened... She called me to have a drink and we were talking about the movie and just... i got drunk . I don’t even remember touching her. i don’t even know if something happened or not! But I do know thatyou’ve been pushing me away...”

“I’m pushing you away? When did i ever..You , you were the one who brought her to our home! And then you left with her! You left me at home and went with her!! .”

“Because i found those pills in the bathroom counter!! ” He yelled.

i froze.

“Taehyung...”

“i found those fucking birth control pills in your bathroom , yesterday okay?? That was why i had to get out of the house!! that was why i fucking went with that woman and got fucking drunk because i found out that my wife is on birth control, while here i am, praying every second of everyday that god would just grant me one miracle.... That i’d be able to hold my baby...!! How long have you been on those, huh? ! when were you even planning to tell me about those!!” He whispered.

I felt my entire body go ice cold. Oh God, i had left them on the counter. Shit. Shit. Shit.

“I... I just... “

“How long..? Just telkl me how long, that’s all i want to hear”

i took a deep breath

“Two years.” I said finally.

He laughed.

“Great. That’s just so fucking great...”

i felt my entire body seize up in protest.

“But I stopped three months ago!!! Taehyung, we’d been trying for six years and i was just so frustrated!! i was so scared and i just wanted to .”

I bit my lips, not sure how to explain it.

TAehyung growled low.

“ Wanted to what? Take away even the little chance that we did have?!! Yeah, we’ve been trying for years....So what? I don’t mind trying for another decade! I .. Want us to have a kid. I want a child and i know, deep down that we’re meant to have one! I just don’t know why you decided to just stop trying without even talking to me about it. That isn’t a breach of trust?! Do you have any idea how i felt, seeing those damn pills!” He shouted.

“So you went out an banged the first girl you met! That makes sense! That makes it all okay!! Doesn’t it?? ”

“I went out because i was afraid , i would fucking lose it! That i’d yel;l at you or God forbid break something! i left because i wanted to get my head on straight.. But you know what’s funny? even when i was leaving, i saw you standing there looking so lost and I wanted to make it better....” He shook his head.

I bit my lips.

“I... Ever since you started doing that movie, you’ve been distant. You were attarcted to her, don’t deny it!”

“Are you insane? If i was attractyed to her and if i wanted her, why would i ask you to come along with me? And i did! ... I asked you to come with me. I hoped that we could talk it out. That we could at least consider adoption. But all you kept saying was ‘ your career is important. You need to concentrate on your work.’....”

“Because, I knew how important it was to you!! You worked so hard on that movie, i didn’t want you to be stressed out because of me as well!”

“And who the hell are you to decide that, huh? You get to choose when I should come to you? You get to decide when I should stay away?! It doesn’t matter what i want?”

I clenched my fists.

“Don’t try to turn this on me.” I whispered.

“Turn what? The blame? I’m not. I’m not saying that i cheated because of what you did. I’m saying that, I felt cheated on as well, when i saw those pills. “

I laughed in disbelief.

“Are you saying it’s the same thing? Me taking pills and you cheating on me ?!”

“No! I’m saying that at least i didn’t know what i was doing. I didn’t mean to have one to many drinks yesterday. i fully meant to come back home to you. But i hadn’t slept in eighteen fucking hours and I was so fucking tired. And then i saw those damn pils and i made a mistake? I should have had my head on staright but i was hurt and I was lonely and she was there.. she was just there ... when i needed someone...”

I stared at him, feeling miserable.

“Taehyung, i don’t want to fight. i think.. We need a break. You and i... we need to get our head on straight before we just say stuff that’s going to make everything worse. ”

He didn’t respond.

“Let’s just take a break.” I said again.

“You want to leave me then?” He said sulkily.

“Not.. leave. I don’t know.. i just.. we’ve known each other and loved each other for eight years Taehyung !! After eight years it’s not that simple! i can’t just up and leave you and i can’t just forgive you either and i know that you’re hurt about the pills and i know that i shouldn’t have done that but.. I just... I wanted to stop being so disappointed , every monthh ... i wanted to move on and accept that maybe we weren’t meant to have kids and i was scared that you wouldn’t agree...”

“So you went and did it anyway...”

“Shut up and hear me out! I was scared and I was lonely and i made a mistake. and i’m going to ... give you the benefit of the doubt about what happened last night. But it still doesn’t change the fact that I’m hurt. I need time. And I think so do you. Let’s just take a break from each other.”

He sighed.

“You’re right. Just.. I don’t want us to end like this.i don’t want us to end , period. i’m not ready for that. ” He said fists clenching.

I softened.

“we’re not ending. It’s just a phase. We’ll work it out. “ I said, the words fake and meaningless.

“I’ll move out then...” He began

“No! i.. my studio is still free . I think i want to paint a bit more. I’d like to go back there.” I said.

He sighed and nodded.

“So, that’s it then?”

“Let’s not make this more difficult. I’ll pack and be gone by the end of the day. if you could just... I don’t know.. go somewhere else...”

“Fine. Yeah, i understand. Okay. That’s fine. i’ll do that...”

“Thank you. And the tea is getting cold. You should have some, for your hangover. I’ve left it on the top shelf. It’s ginger, thyme , fennel .”

He smiled faintly.

“I can’t believe I’m letting you walk out like this...”

I ducked my head.

“i’m really happy that you are. “

“i may change my mind and come drag you back home. Just fair warning.” He said softly and I relaxed a little, feeling oddly nostalgic at the friendly banter.

We used to be best friends, I thought miserably. More than lovers, we were best friends. Our relationship was never about sex or romance or anything . it was about support and trust and just accepting each other the way we were.

“You still are...” He said suddenly, as though reading my mind.

“what?”

“My best friend. Always.”

“ To the moon and back?? ” i whispered, the forgotten phrase slipping out. His gaze softened and he smiled faintly.

“To the moon and back.” He moved closer and gave me a gentle hug . The scent of him was ... home.

Taehyung would always be home. I pulled away and sighed, watching him as he carefully took a sip of the tea and then downed it in one shot. He then picked up his jacket, gave me one last look of regret and walked out. I sagged against the table after the door shut behind him.

Home wasn’t home without Taehyung. So it wasn’t even difficult, packing my stuff and leaving our condo.

AUTHOR’S NOTE : Maybe one day i’ll let my characters be happy for once.. Ugh. Sorry.. Let me know what you think though!!

#bts imagines #kim taehyung #bts v #bts fanfics

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specificallyeol · 7 years

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k d r a m a r e c o m m e n d a t i o n s

If you’re new to the Korean Drama world or you just want to watch more kdramas, here is a list for you!

[Disclaimer: These are not the only Kdrama choses you can watch. There are a lot of Kdramas out there depending on your suitable taste. This is just a guide]

Kill Me Heal Me

A story between a boy with Dissociative Identity Disorder or Multiple Personality Disorder and a girl who is a psychiatrist. As expected to a good kdrama, there are a lot of plot twists, revelations and such so be ready for that.

Jisung, who played the role of Cha Do Hyun, really did a great job portraying his character especially because he has 7 personalities.

Main Casts:

Ji Sung [지성] as Cha Do Hyun

Hwang Jung Eum [황정음] as Oh Ri JIn

Park Seo Joon [박서준] as Oh Ri On

If I were to give only one kdrama recommendation, this is the drama that I will recommend. This is good for people who doesn’t know about kdrama but wants to watch but they don’t know what to watch first. Tip: Don’t read anything about this drama in Wikipedia if you don’t want any spoilers.

Personal opinion about the drama:

This drama is just so good, what can I say more. I love love love this drama so much. It’s such a rollercoaster ride when I watched it. It might be very confusing at first (but seriously all kdramas are like that), but you’ll love it. Rate: 10/10

It isn’t a Kdrama without OST:

Most favorite OST: Auditory Hallucination by Jang Jae In feat. NaShow

Goblin

A story about a goblin and protector of souls who is in search for his bride that will end his long life and a high school student that has a painful past. This drama will make your mind go everywhere with all the scenes and events. This drama has a lot of breathtaking cinematographies and poetic lines.

Main Casts:

Gong Yoo [공유] as Kim Shin

Kim Go Eun [김고은] as Ji Eun Tak

Lee Dong Wook [이동욱] as Grim Reaper

Yoo In Na [유인나] as Sunny

Yook Sungjae [육성재] as Yoo Deok Hwa

If you can watch heavy dramas then you’ll be okay (i think) to watch this.

Personal opinion about the drama:

I love this kdrama so much especially because it is an hour and a half long, you’ll see yourself too attached to the characters even if they not the main ones. I cried so much, laughed so much, it’s such a mixed emotions while watching this drama. But to be honest, it’s so confusing for my brain to handle with all those scenes and such.

Rate: 9.5/10

Most favorite OSTs from this drama:

Stay With Me by Chanyeol and Punch

Round and Round by Heize and Han Soo JI

Descendants of the Sun

A Story about a captain of a South Korean Special Forces unit and a doctor. Their love story is so confusing because you’ll never know why, when and how they got angry at each other and then make up together and then they had a quarrel again. Their love story might be confusing but their story is very interesting. Also the story between Seo Dae Young and Yoon Myung Ju and very interesting too.

Main Casts:

Song Joong Ki [송중기] as Yoo Si Jin

Song Hye Kyo [송혜교] as Kang Mo Yeon

Jin Goo [진구] as Seo Dae Young

Kim Ji Won [김지원] as Yoon Myung Ju

Personal opinion about the drama:

Why did I even included this on my recommendation? It’s everywhere since last year, it was a major hit. But yeah, as I have said, their love story is very confusing that’s why most of the time I lost track of their relationship. If you have watched The Heirs and Goblin already, you’ll notice that it has the same confusing love story as Descendants of the Sun. If you don’t know yet, The writer of The Heirs and Goblin is also the writer of Descendants of the Sun that’s why it has the same feel about the love story.

Rate: 9.5/10

Most favorite OSTs from this drama:

Everytime by Chen and Punch

Always by Yoon Mi Rae

Once Again by Kim Na Young feat. Mad Clown

Who Are You: School 2015

I actually don’t know how write the plot of this without giving spoilers so I’m just going to keep it simple. This is a story about a girl who got bullied. Yeah sorry that’s all I can say. It has a lot of plot twists and I never been so angry in my life while watching this drama.

Main Casts:

Kim So Hyun [김소현] as Lee Eun Bi / Go Eun Byul

Yook Sung Jae [육성재] as Gong Tae Kwang

Nam Joo Hyuk [남주혁] as Han Yi An

Personal opinion about the drama:

I suffered so much from second lead syndrome because of this kdrama. It is a highschool story so if you love highschool stories, this one is for you. I love how it didn’t focused on just the main casts but there are a lot of side stories. It’s also a little bit of mystery so there are a lot revelations.

Rate: 8/10

Most favorite OSTs from this drama:

Reset by Tiger JK feat. Jinsil

I’ll Listen To What You Have To Say by Yoon Mi Rae

Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo

A story about a girl that went back in time during Goryeo Dynasty and she encounters the princes that will change her life. This drama is very emotional and heartbreaking so prepare a lot of tissues for that. The OSTs of this drama are so so good. A lot of plot twists and revelations happened in this kdrama.

Main Casts:

Lee Joon Gi [이준기] as Wang So

Lee Ji Eun [이지은] as Go Ha Jin / Hae Soo

Kang Ha Neul [강하늘] as Wang Wook

If you love historical kdramas, this one is for you.

Personal opinion about the drama:

This is the first historical drama I ever watched and I enjoyed it so much. I love the story line and how the casts execute their characters. I even cried at episode two even though it’s not really something to cry for (I’m a crybaby). I super super love the OSTs of this drama, they give a new meaning to the drama itself. I badly need a season two.

Rate: 9.5/10

Most favorite OSTs from this drama:

For You by Chen, Baekhyun and Xiumin

I Love You, I Remember by I.O.I

Be With You by AKMU

[It’s so hard to choose my most favorite OSTs.]

Healer

A story about an illegal mercenary with the codename “Healer” and a girl who is a reporter. If you enjoyed watching Kill Me Heal Me, you will definitely enjoy this drama also. They almost have a similar plot but the plot twists are different, obviously.

Main Casts:

Ji Chang Wook [지창욱] as Healer

Park Min Young [박민영] as Chae Young Shin

Yoo Ji Tae [유지태] Kim Moon Ho

If you love action with a little bit of mystery stories, this one is for you.

Personal opinion about the drama:

I love this kdrama sooooo much. I cannot say anything negative about the story because everything is just so perfect. From the chemistry of the main casts, the revelations, the plot twists and everything, they gave me goosebumps. I love the part when they play an instrumental every time Healer is about to do something good or bad.

Rate: 10/10

Most favorite OSTs from this drama:

Healer by Various Artists

You by Ben

[The Healer one is the instrumental I am talking about. I get very emotional by just listening to that instrumental.]

That’s the end of my recommendations! I don’t want to make it very long and I just included the kdramas that really really gave me mixed emotions and kdramas that I can recommend to someone who doesn’t watch kdramas. Also, I’m so sorry if the plot is very short. I don’t really know how to write a plot and I don’t want to give any spoilers and such. Anyways, I hope you’ll watch one of my recommendations and tell me what you love the most. I might do another recommendation in the future.

#kdrama #recommendations #kdrama recommendations #Kill Me Heal Me #Goblin #Descendants of the Sun #Who Are You #Moon Lovers #Healer

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yysydyo · 7 years

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Translation W Korea Interview : Kim Rae Won <A Serious Man>

Q: It's quite a lot of male fans that like you. Is there any reason why your popularity among male was quite strong in Korea even time past could it because of your image?

KRW: That's why I also curious about that too. Mens seems like me a lot. That's why.. that was nothing (laugh). Fortunately, after I done drama Doctors, I gained some female fans. That drama was really fun and was a good memory. That was the most comfortable character that I have done in my 20 years of acting.

Q: "Are you married? Do you have boyfriend? It's okay then" can a man do this script part in reality?

KRW: Even if you can do that part cool like in the drama, then you can frankly ask her "are you married or do you have boyfriend now?" that was more than enough to ask that woman.

Q: There's a lot of entertainers that mimics act as Kim Rae Won as their individual talents. That piece of god art that highlight part in movie "Sunflowers". More than that artistic ability, what do you feels about that part now?

KRW: I like it. Thank you.

Q: Do you know someone that was similar like you now?

KRW: Not long time ago, on Youtube I have watch one person who mimics <Ajushi> and I think that come out well and turn out to be my university junior who recently act in <Missing 9> Choi Tae Joon.

Q: So what you say is Choi Tae Joon was actors that copy the best?

KRW: He was one of hoobae that I cherish. We meet sometimes but TaeJoon never do that imitations of me in front of me, but he will do it when I'm not around. I heard he was quite good.

Q: Last year in your drama <Doctors> and Han Suk Kyu in <Romantic Doctors Kim Sabu> both of you wear a doctor gown, and in The Prison both of you wear prison dress. How it feel spend time with Han Suk Kyu?

KRW: Even though that this was our first project, when have known each other for 7 years. Our commons hobby was fishing. One day, I received a call from Han Suk Kyu manager and say "I heard Rae Won like fishing how about fishing together?" so because of that I meet with Sunbaenim. During our fishing, we have thought when will we get a chance to work together and though this movie we get a chance to work together. During fishing he was someone like neighborhood hyung but when filming he was someone that respectfully to see.

Q: Let say, you and Han Suk Kyu are fishing side by side. Suddenly the water splashed on your clothes who will first say "Oh come on!".

KRW: We said a word after an hour. (Laugh) Do you want to know what it is? "Raewon-i. Do you want to have a cup of coffee?" Or "Raewon-a, what do you think about love?" We also keep our distance to avoid interrupting each other, but if we cant catch any fish then we will sit side by side and talk again. As an actors' there's cycle of six months of doing his job and another six months was a break. So because of that you can go fishing for half of a year. I went fishing for 200 days in a year in one room with Han Sunbae. Thats why i am close to him. Sometimes, If I overslept, he will wake me up. "Hey, wakeup quickly!"

Q: What is the charm of fishing? A man whom enjoys fishing is somehow related to someone who has metaphorical figure.

KRW: Its not as better as drinking and partying. But I think it just good to be alone. Last year, at the end of the year, I was in a "southern island(?)" for two months. There are many types of fish. At there, they are fishing on the cliff and its dangerous. If you go there, you'll be stunned. Its not a suitable place for you to swim. u will die if u fall from the cliff . and I thought its not the right thing for me to do. Now I'm not going to do any thrilling fishing (dangerous).

Q: Do you think hands are important to male actors? Sometimes you need to act by using your hands and fingers.

KRW: No, hands are not really important. Its only important for those whom are still 20. The best male actor in our nation like Han Suk Kyu, Song Kang Ho and Choi Min-sik do their put hands as a goal? It's hard to imagine a young actor who can only talk about acting. I think I've come to the real standard as an actor now and this is all the beginning.

Q: Its a little surprising to hear that. You are more impress with the talent rather than young star.

KRW: When I was a child, I saw a script and try it really hard. And people liked it. I was so lucky to have this work. Since I start my career early so I already get use to life alone. One day I went home to see my mother and my sister, I naturally help my mom.

Q: Do you have any motivation to change your life?

KRW: I do not mean I have changed. From the beginning, I tried not to be too confident. But when I look back, when I was twenties, I gained so much fame and popularity and I was arrogant. It may be normal to a youth. hurmm. Did i just gave u a bad example? Well, do u want to know word that i dislike the most? "whats so great about them?" when I think i can really do it.

Q: What do you think when you look at ur past work?

KRW: During my earlier work, i miss and dont know lots of things. I do not have any ambition on that time. But because of it, i did it honestly with fresh mind. But when im getting better , the freshness is falling. There's will be some controlled between freshness and competence but still you can't help to do anything if people can't see it. I just need to put a lot of effort on that.

Q: Can u give us example what kind of effort u have done?

KRW: It is not easy to explain one by one about my life and if possible I don't want to talk about it. I just want to live with honesty. But when Im getting older, I keep thinking about my life. Beside, what I've veen going through is totally different from what people see. If someone has reached my age, they will be able to talk well. However, I can't help thinking what I can't archive. At least person who choose to be a artist can honestly with their feelings and the condition of maintain to be yourself was something that need to protect.

Translation may contain accurateness.

Translate by : 썬샤안 , 한석규팬.

Do not take out this translation out, thank you.

#translation #kim rae won #kimraewon #w korea

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malaysiankpopfans · 5 years

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OCTOBER 2019 HIGHLIGHTS

This October, the channel with the ultimate Korean entertainment, Oh!K (Astro Ch 394), is bringing fans two new dramas; Extra-Ordinary You, premiering on Thursday, 3rd October and will air every Thursday to Friday @ 7.50 p.m. and Blessings of The Sea premiering on Thursday, 17th October and will air every Thursday to Friday @ 9.00 p.m.

Aside from that, Oh!K will be airing the final episode of Golden Garden on 27th October, Sunday @ 7.20 p.m., 100 Year legacy on 2nd October, Wednesday @ 11.00 p.m., Love Me Actually on 13th October, Sunday @ 9.20 p.m. and Iron Daughters-in-Law on 16 October, Wednesday @ 9.00 p.m..

K-drama fans looking for their daily K-fix can continue to catch new episodes of My Healing Love on Mondays @ 7.50 p.m. They can also catch I Live Alone on Sundays @ 10.50 p.m., aired 2 weeks after Korea.

PRIMETIME DRAMAS

Extra-Ordinary You

NEW DRAMA PREMIERES 3rd OCTOBER WITHIN 24 HOURS OF KOREA

Thursday to Friday at 7.50 p.m.

Cast: Kim Hye Yoon, Ro Woon, Lee Jae Wook

Subtitles: English, Simplified Chinese, Bahasa Melayu

Eun Danoh is a 17-year-old high-school student from a wealthy family who suffers from a lifelong heart condition that inevitably means she will not live past her teenage years. However, when Danoh realizes she is experiencing long gaps in her memory as well, she comes into the unhappy inheritance of another fact in her life: she is a character in a Korean webtoon and all of her actions are predetermined by the artist who draws her. To make matters worse, she discovers she is only a supporting character in the cast. With her newfound understanding of the world she inhabits, she is determined to find true love in her own plotline and circumvent the author’s plans for her character by utilizing the flashes of storyboard she alone is able to see.

Blessing of The Sea

NEW DRAMA PREMIERES 17th OCTOBER

Tuesday to Friday at 9.00 p.m.

Cast: Lee So Yun, Jae Hee, Jo An, Kim Hyung Min

Audio: Mandarin and Bahasa Melayu

Subtitles: English, Simplified Chinese, Bahasa Melayu

The Korean tale, Sim Chung Yi is a well-known fable about a young girl sacrificing her life to save her blind father. She is often referred as the best daughter, but does she really deserve all the praise to herself? The neighboring women who breast-fed her during her childhood, the Dragon King who took her in as his wife and searched for her father Sim Hak Gyu, all supported and loved her. She could be brave because of the faith people had in her all along. Just like the fable, the Sim Chung Yi in this drama also finds her way out of the harsh reality even after losing both of her parents. Here’s to the modern-day Sim Chung Yis!

Golden Garden

FINALE 27th OCTOBER WITHIN 24 HOURS OF KOREA

Sunday at 7.20 p.m.

Cast: Han Ji-Hye, Lee Sang-Woo, Oh Ji-Eun, Lee Tae-Sung

Subtitles: English, Simplified Chinese, Bahasa Melayu

Eun Dong-Joo (Han Ji-Hye) attempts to get back her stolen life. When she was 6 years-old, she was abandoned at an orphanage. She did not remember anything except her name. Despite her difficult environment, she has grown into a woman with a positive and bright personality.

Cha Pil-Seung (Lee Sang-Woo) is a detective, who is good at his job. His parents died when he was young and he was then raised by his wealthy grandmother. Even though he is popular with women, he doesn't fall in love with anyone due to trauma from his parents' deaths.

100 Year Legacy

FINALE 2nd OCTOBER

Monday to Friday at 11.00 p.m.

Cast: Eugene, Lee Jung Jin, Choi Won Young, Yoon A-Jung

Audio: Mandarin

Subtitles: English, Simplified Chinese, Bahasa Melayu

Min Chae-won is the eldest granddaughter of a family living in the outskirts of Seoul who has been running a noodle factory for three generations. Married for three years to Chul-gyu, whose rich family owns the major corporation Golden Dragon Food, Chae-won has a difficult life because her mother-in-law fiercely opposes them and will not accept her.

When her husband cheats on her, she detaches herself from her in- laws and decides to divorce him. Her mother-in-law has her falsely committed to a mental institution as revenge for the divorce. She returns to the noodle factory and struggles to modernize and expand it. Chae-won later meets Lee Se-yoon, the son of a wealthy household, who is infamous for his disparaging treatment of all those around him. They both nurse wounds from their past romantic relationships.

Iron Daughters-In-Law

FINALE 16th OCTOBER

Tuesday to Friday at 9.00 p.m.

Cast: Shin Ae-ra, Kang Boo-ja, Kim Bo-yun, Lee Honey

Audio: Mandarin and Bahasa Melayu

Subtitles: English, Simplified Chinese, Bahasa Melayu

Oh Yeong-shim (Shin Ae-ra) is an excellent cook and runs the household superbly. With her down-to-earth, friendly personality, she is liked by almost everyone. But she has had difficulties in conceiving a child for years with her husband. Tragedy befalls her when her husband dies in a car accident. Widowed and lonely, she is also blamed by her mother-in-law for not bearing a son who will carry the family name. Ridden with guilt due to her shortcomings as a woman, wife and daughter-in-law, she finds it hard to endure life...

My Healing Love

Monday at 7.50 p.m.

Cast: So Yoo Jin, Yeon Jung Hoon, Yoon Jong Hoon

Audio: Mandarin

Subtitles: English, Simplified Chinese, Bahasa Melayu

The success story follows Im Chi Woo and Choi Jin Yoo as they pursue their own happiness. Im Chi Woo never wanted to become a good daughter, a good daughter-in-law or a good wife, but she sacrifices herself to take care of her family. She is married to immature Park Wan Seung and she works several part- time jobs to support her family. Under her difficult situation, she keeps smiling and maintaining her positive attitude.

Choi Jin Yoo is a divorcee and he has a daughter. He works hard and tries to live positively for his daughter. He encounters a nightmare like a scenario.

VARIETY SHOWS

Love Me Actually

FINALE 13th OCTOBER

Sunday at 9.25 p.m.

Cast: Heo Kyung Hwan, Park Sung Kwang, Kim Min Kyu, Yang Se Chan

Subtitles: English, Simplified Chinese, Bahasa Melayu

Up until now, there has not been a club like this one. The Love Me Actually club is a unique gathering of five, charming, single men, still in their quest of finding a genuine love. The five men meet other single women that join the club voluntarily to escape their dull and jaded lives. The club takes them to different destinations all over the country and gives them a chance to get to know each other. And who knows, maybe exploring new places might unknowingly spark that love they all desire. The five eligible bachelors consist of the comic Heo Kyeong Hwan, the business savvy entrepreneur Park Sung Kwang, the rapper from INFINITE Dong Woo, the irresistible smiley Yang Se Chan, and the youngest of them all, the up- and-coming star actor Kim Min Kyu. Join them and the hosts in this real romance variety show and experience the endless laughter, the awkwardness, and the affection each one of them has to offer. Maybe you should volunteer to join, who will be the one to make your heart flutter?

I Live Alone

2 WEEKS AFTER KOREA

Sunday at 10.50 p.m.

Cast: Kian 84, Lee Si-eon, Park Na-rae, Sung Hoon, Hwa Sa, Henry

Subtitles: English, Simplified Chinese, Bahasa Melayu & Bahasa Indonesia

Get an inside look at the everyday lives of your favourite celebrities and their lives

#ohk #kdrama #kvariety #extraordinaryyou #ilivealone #blessingofthesea #goldengarden #100yearlegacy #myhealinglove #irondaughtersinlaw #LoveMeActually #pressrelease

0 notes

lubdubsworld · 7 years

Text

The unfaithful Wife ( Jimin /OC)

Chapter 2

I stopped short in front of my apartment, dread rising up inside me like a living thing as i stared at the man in front of my door. I swallowed nervously. How dare he come here? I pulled Jin Soo closer and hoisted him up into my waist , before walking over to the door. Lee Taemin straightened up from where he was leaning against the wall of the door and I resisted the urge to be physically sick. He disgusted me.

"Min Hee yah... Oppa has been waiting for such a long time... Were you held up by something?"

"What do you want?" I swallowed.

"Can't I come visit my favorite girl? Jin Soo, say hello to uncle.." He said to my son, who dutifully whispered, " Hello uncle."

"Jin Soo, come here..." I opened the apartment door and sent my son in , " Mama will be right there.. Why don't you go set up your truck.. We can play ??" I smiled and he nodded eagerly, rushing in to find his toy. I shut the door carefully before rounding on Tae Min.

"Stop chasing me. I don't want anything to do with you..." I snapped. Tae Min ignored me and reached out curling one finger around a lock of my long hair, yanking sharply. I shoved him away but he grabbed my wrists, pulling me flush against his chest. His grip was so strong I could feel a whimper build up inside my throat but I swallowed it.

"Leave.. before I call the cops..." I spat out and he rolled his eyes.

"We both know you aren't going to do that... Did you hear about your wonderful Jimin? He's getting married now. I think you can drop your penance now and come to me. " He said angrily . I yanked my hand away hard, although it hurt like hell and he let go.

"Get out. " I said, voice trembling.

"Your son is the rightful heir to the Park empire. Do you really want him to grow up like a pauper while some other child takes his place? Come to me and he can have everything he's supposed to have. Everything he deserves. Don't be foolish , babe. " He said warningly.

I glared at him.

"He will have everything he deserves and it doesn't have to be from you or anyone else. I can damn well give him the life he deserves. Get the hell out of my face.." I snarled.

He grinned at that.

"You're delusional if you think you're little cup-cake business is going to turn you into a freaking millionaire. Listen to sense, woman. Park Jimin is getting married. He's not going to forgive you or take you back..."

I snorted.

"You're an idiot, if you think I want to go back to him... I hate him almost as much as I hate you..."

"Really? ... So you don't mind the fact that I told him you're my mistress...."

I froze in place.

"What?" I whispered in disbelief.

"He came by the office earlier looking like death. And that bird-brained fiancee of his was yelling at him about you. i decided to bring some peace by letting him know that you were with me now, so he needn't worry. What's wrong? You should be happy.... At least you can have some pride in case you run into him... "

"You're disgusting..." I turned around to leave, reaching for the door knob but he yanked my hand away.

"I'll leave... but you know what always amazed me? How quick Jimin is at believing anything I tell him about you... I mean five years ago, he believed that I slept with you and today he was just as quick to believe that you're still sleeping with him. He doesn't trust you an inch, does he?" He said , sounding amused.

I pulled my hand away , my entire body shaking in violent rejection. It hurt so damn much because it was true. Jimin had never trusted me. When I'd needed him the most, he'd abandoned me. But he'd known Taemin since childhood. Even though they were business rivals, they were best-friends . So when Taemin had assaulted me, tried to hurt me in the worst way possible , Jimin had believed his rediculous story of me seducing him. Apparently he still believed it.

I shook my head resolutely. I would not let Park Jimin into my head again. What was done, was done. I couldn't go through that again.

"Make your choice wisely, Min Hee. One of these days I'm going to stop asking and I'm just going to take what I want." Lee Taemin warned as I slammed the door shut on his face.

~~~~~~~~~~

"I'm sorry about last evening." I said and Mrs . Min waved it off.

"I'm very familiar with how these society brats act, Ms. Kim. I'm not one to lose good talent because of some hysteric and insecure female. You're welcome to work with me, because you're good at what you do. " She said with a cheerful smile and i felt my respect for the woman grow tenfold. I wasn't used to acceptance. In the early days of my divorce, when the scandal and my face was fresh in everyone's mind, no one had wanted to give me a job. I shut away the old memories and smiled cheerfully at Mrs. Min.

"Thank you so much. You won't be disappointed." i said resolutely.

We spent the next few hours discussing the menu for the upcoming wedding and I had a very bitter revelation. No matter how long it had been, no matter how much I ought to hate the man who had failed me, I couldn't really bear the thought of him with another woman. It was a shameful realization , one that made me hate myself.

It was almost evening by the time I packed everything up, a blueprint and a timeline framed. There were two dozen different recipes to be perfected and tweaked and i could see a few sleepless nights ahead of me. I glanced at the clock and felt a little bit of elation. Mrs. Min had offered me an advance which would likely cover my rent and Jin Soo's daycare fee. It was also just a little past five which meant i could take Jin Soo to the park ,give ourself a little treat. i hadn't been out with him in over two weeks, weighed down by work. My mood perking up considerably, I slowly walked the few dozen blocks to the daycare.

In the beginning I hadn't been able to afford public transport everywhere. So I'd learned to walk. But now, it was more habit than anything else. I enjoyed walking in the fresh air. kit helped clear my head and brough a modicum of peace in an otherwise turbulent life. But today there was no peace to be found. Tears stung instead.

I still felt upset although the initial bitter anger that I'd had for him had now faded into a dull ache, a sort of hopeless acceptance really. Some relationships, I'd convinced myself, were only meant to reach a certain level. Maybe we were just one of those couples who were never meant to be together at all. It was easier to think of it that way, rather than to endlessly nurture hatred and anger for a man, who would probabaly never accept that he had been the one in the wrong.

But , stunningly, it was the good times we'd shared that were harder to forget. The late night ice cream runs, the walks, the shared dreams and the endless nights of passion. I hjad been young, but I'd truly loved him and in his own way he had loved me too. I was sure of that.

But it had all changed when Lee Taemin had come into our life. He was Jimin's best friend , almost like a brother and they'd grown up together before Taeming had moved to Busan. He had been working in Busan before moving back to Seoul, about four months after our marriage. I'd always noticed the way he looked at me but I'd been a naive eighteen year old. Too embarrassed to bring it up to Jimin. It was the worst mistake of my life. Maybe if I'd confided early on, the events that followed would have gone differently.

One night, about a year into our marriage, when Jimin had been working late. Taemin had come home. I'd been nervous , had texted Mirae to call Jimin.... Because I couldn't do it in front of Tae Min who looked drunk as well as dangerous. But that had just been another huge mistake on my part.

In the end my husband had walked in on Taemin pinning me to the couch, and to my complete and utter horror he had taken Taemin's side. I'd been furious and angry that he would suspect me , had walked out on him with dignified anger.

But what i hadn't known back then was that Mi Rae had always resented that I had managed to land the most eligible bachelor in all of Korea. So she took the opportunity to completely wreck my marriage. And hurtfully, Jimin fell for her little ploy. It took me a few weeks to realize that Mi Rae had told Jimin that I was cheating on him with Taemin and if he left at once he could catch me in the act. I'd been horrified and determined not to let a silly misunderstanding come between us. But it was too late and the damage had been done.

And i had begged. Shamelessly. on my knees, i had begged Jimin to believe me. But all he'd done was throw a cheque on my face and ask me to get out.

I stopped short when I realized that I'd somehow managed to walk past the Daycare center, lost in thought.

"Mommy!! You came fast..." Jin Soo threw himself into my arms and I melted a bit, the sweet smell of baby powder clinging to him . He was such a well-behaved kid, I always felt blessed. I may regret a lot of things about my life but I would never regret marrying Jimin. Simply because it had given me this wonderful boy in return.

"What say, we go to the park? Blow some bubbles, get some dukbokki..." I grinned and Jin Soo's face lit up like a Christmas tree.

"Yes.. Yes.. Park!!" He squealed and the caretaker, Ms. Lee gave me an amused smile.

"He's so happy when you come early. " She smiled. I nodded.

"I'll try to be early more often. " i said sincerely.

When I stepped out of the daycare , I got a genuine heart attack.

Park Jimin stood at the entrance, a shiny black Porsche parked near the curb as he stared up at the sky , seemingly lost in thought. He didn't seem to be there on purpose. So it was all just a hideous coincidence, that he'd somehow managed to stop right in front of the daycare when i was taking Jin Soo out. He was dressed in a simple white t-shirt and jeans and I swallowed nervously. He looked even better than I remembered and I had a disturbing flashback to how he used to wear the same white t shirt and faded jeans on weekends that he would spend, wrapped up on the couch with me. I had to drag myself to the present, remind myself of all the reasons he couldn't see me now, with Jin Soo.

Just as I tried to make up my mind if i ought to just run. he turned around and I froze in my tracks , his gaze pinning me to the pavement.

And then I actually made the mistake of turning and running. Jin Soo cried out in shock as I held him closer.

I barely reached a few steps before Jimin managed to come ahead, holding both arms up as he stared at me.

"Min Hee, what the hell.."

"What are you doing here???" I hissed, panicking.

"What the hell a re you doing?" He rasped out. His eyes finally focused on Jin soo, who was staring at him in wide eyed terror, trying to burrow closer to my shoulder. I stepped back a few more steps and Jimin stared at me in disbelief .

"Jimin... You should leave.." I said desperately.

" He looks like me... Just like me... Fuck, Min Hee.... Tell me it's not what I think. You wouldn't hide something like that from me, would you??" He snarled.

I sobbed out a protest. " You kicked me out of your life, you have no right..."

"Like hell i don't.... Tell me the truth..." He demanded and I looked away from him, panting. We were in a public street and people were starting to stare.

"Let's... Let's talk about this like civil people..." I begged.

His eyes narrowed and then widened when Jin Soo burst into tears. His gaze softened and he looked torn. I quickly pulled Jin Soo close and shushed him.

"It's okay... baby.... This is a friend... Momma's friend.. Don't worry... He's an.. uncle.." I said helplessly . Jimin gave me a look that was impossible to decipher.

"Like Taemin uncle?" Jin Soo sniffled and both of us froze. Jimin's face slowly turned black and hard and I shut my eyes in despair.

"Yes... " I choked out." Like Taemin uncle.."

"We need to talk.." Jimin said fiercely and I stared at him. There was no sign of the man I'd once loved. He looked hard and unforgiving , like he wouldn't stop at anything to get what he wanted.

I nodded bleakly.

"I.. I can meet you tomorrow. After dropping my ... After dropping Jin Soo off." I said quietly.

"Good. And don't even think of running away again. Now that I know what you've been hiding from me, I'll chase you to the depths of hell if you try to get away from me. you're not getting away from me this time." He whispered.

And then suddenly, chillingly, he reached out and brushed a strand of my hair away from my forehead.

The touch of his fingers to my skin made my entire body seize up.

"Jimin..."

"Tomorrow."

And then he turned and walked away.

#bts park jimin #jimin #bts imagines #bts fanfics

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lubdubsworld · 7 years

Text

Something’s Gotta Give ( Taehyung/OC) chapter two

“TaeTae?” I whispered gently, pushing open the dressing room of the penthouse suite in his estate. The inside is dim, weak sunlight pouring in through the gap between the silk curtains. My husband was slumped in front of the bed, staring at the clothes he was supposed to be dressed in. The black tuxedo.

I bit my lips in consternation. His father’s funeral service was due to start in half an hour and everyone was waiting for him. He would have to give the eulogy and here he was , still in his jeans and shirt, looking like hell.

“Taetae, what’s wrong?” I said gently, moving closer and lightly touching his shoulder.

“My father hated black.” He said dully. I felt my heart skip a beat.

“Taehyung…”

“He hated it so much. We’re supposed to send him off happy right? He’s not going to be happy if everyone’s in black. I can’t wear this..” He said , biting his lips and there’s just so much anguish in his face that I clench my fists to stop the tears. I loved him so much and to see him struggling so hard not to crumble in on himself is heartwrenching.

“Tae Tae, your father’s already hgappy. He’s in a better place. You know you can’t wear anything different. The press and your family.. they’ll think you’re disrespoecting him…”

“What do they know?! i don’t care about them.. i care about my daddy! He liked blue. I want to wear my blue shirt. He bought me that. ” He muttered mutinously and I swallowed. The press would butcher him. They were always looking to brign down Taehyung. His talent, his beauty and his endearing good nature making him an object of envy for everyone.

We;ll, not on my watch.

“Okay, Tae Tae, baby is it okay if I wear it instead? Dad loved me too right? He’ll understand if i had to wear it instead. “

Taehyung stared at me frowning.

“It’s a men’s shirt. You can’t wear it.” He said softly.

i shrugged.

“Why not? I’ll wear it.. see… “ i quickkly grabbed the hem of my black dress pulling it up and off me swiftly. I stepped right out of it, moving to the closet and going throught he shirts. i knew which shirt he was talking about. A pinstriped baby blue one, a little faded from how often Taehyung had worn it.

I slipped it on swiftly, buttoning it up. it was way too big on me but I ignored it, grabbing a pair of my own jeans and slipping them on too.

“They may yell at you for not wearing black.” Taehyung muttered and i waved it off.

“Who cares about them? Come on. Wear your tux! We’ll go say good bye to your father.”

Taehyung smiled softly.

“I love you.” He whispered, holding both hands out.

My heart stuttered painfully. I slowly made my way over and he hugged my waist, face buried into my stomach, the fabric of the shirt soaking up his tears. I stroked hims

“i love you too baby. I’d do anything for you. “ I bent over and kissed the top of his head.

And they did yell. They ripped me apart in articles , the general consensus being that ‘ this is why a disrespectful bitch like Jung Rae Mi does not deserve someone like Kim Taehyung. “

But really, what did it matter, when Taehyung started smiling again?

~~~~~~~

“Taehyung’s back in town , I heard? How’s he doing?” Yoojung said cheerfully, as I grabbed two boxes of laundry liquids off the shelf and dropped it into the shopping cart.

“He’s tired , of course. They’re letting him take a break for a while. He’s resting.” I smiled cheerfully, carefully omitting out the fact that I hadn’t actually seen my husband yet. He had called me earlier and told me he’d be coming home tomorrow or the day after, once he finished talking to the director about his next project.

“Good. Your anniversary is coming up, right? Next week?” She grinned. “ Where to this time? Hawaii? Paris? Vienna? ugh, you’re so lucky, Rae, he’s the best husband that way. The last time jimin took me out of the country was to watch a stupid baseball game live.” she grimaced.

I smiled. Over the years, we’d always taken a week off after our anniversary to visit one place from our bucket list. So far we’d been to New York, Britain, Scotland, Norway, Spain, Egypt and Brazil. They were usually out of my own pocket. No one in public knew but most of my paintings sold for a lot of money. I worked under a pseudonym, because i knew that being associated with a star like Taehyung would put my own credibility on the line. And it wasn’t like i needed to read more “ she only loves Taehyung because he’s popular” articles.

This year, i had something very special planned. Something i knew Taehyung would love even more than all those overseas trips.

“Reminds me though, you sure you don’t want to meet Yoongi’s new girlfriend? She’s coming to dinner next week.” Yoojung smiled and I grinned shaking my head.

“I refuse to meet any girlfriend of Yoongi’s untill he dates them for longer than a motnh. Remember the last time I called her by his ex-gf’s name. ?” I flinched at the memory.

“He’s a bit too hard to put up with , isn’t he? oh well, suit yourself. Are you busy tonight? Jimin and Hoseok have practice , so me and Sana are planning to meet up for some drink and girl talk.” she smiled.

“Tomorrow. I’ll visit you tomorrow.” I promised apologetically, kissing her cheek and Yoojung frowned but nodded.

“i understand, Tae Tae must be eager to have you all to himself for a while..” She winked and for a second i felt that odd little flutter inside me. It felt like a bit of a lie, agreeing to her teasing and ducking my head like i actually belived her words.

And it was oddly painful, seeing my best friend spill over with her teasing innuendoes , looking so happy for me , no doubt happy that her friend was happy. It hurt, painfully, when i realized that she really did believe that everything was well and good with me and Taehyung. Would she be upset if she knew the truth?

And what was the truth really?

Yoojung smiled and draped an arm over my shoulders, her shorter frame making the pose so awkward but I leaned down to let her hold me, the affectionate gesture soaking into my touch starved soul like a soothing balm. I fought the urge to wrap my limbs around her and cry.

I’m not okay, Yoojung-ah, my marriage is ending, everything i know , everything i love is slipping out of my hands and i don’t know how to make it stop….

“what’s wrong?” Yoojung hesistated, smile faltering just a bit.

I smiled wider, shaking my head.

“Nothing. Come on, let’s pick some fruits for your health freak husband!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

When i opened the door to our home that night, I knew in that particular second, that Taehyung and I were over.

He stood there, dressed in a magnificent black suit , purple silk shirt and perfectly styled hair, his breathtakingly handsome face relaxed in a smile and with another woman on his arms.

For two seconds, I just stood there, stunned because Lalisa Manoban looked even more beautiful in person. She was really tall, almost as tall as Taehyung, incredibly skinny , with shiny hair that hung in thick starnds to her waist. Chestnut brown locks that looked so inviting that even I wanted to run my fingers through.

“Rae… this is my co-star, Lisa. She’s got a flight to thailand tomorrow morning and I thought I could bring her to meet you before that.” Taehyung smiled, wide and bright and Lisa looked cheerful and genuinely happy as well.

I managed an answering smile, holding the door further open and ushering both of them in. Lisa placed her hand on my husband , dainty white fingers curling lightly on the inside of his forearm, the touch familiar and practiced and i turned away, fighting every instinct that screamed to just let the damn tears fall, how long must I act like you aren’t fucking destroying me Kim taehyung…

Not like this, i told myself firmly. you can cry but not like this. Remember how much you hate woman who jump to conclusions. How often you’re talking about people talking without getting all the facts . Don’t be that woman.

“ I’m really looking forward to the movie.” i said with a smile , watching her as she sat down on the chair. Taehyung hesitated for a second and i noticed the way he almost went to the place next to her, before coming to his senses and sitting next to me instead. I smiled as he casually draped an arm over my shoulder , his body heavy over me, his scent familiar and intoxicating filling me up with familiar arousal. I hadn’t seen him in eight weeks. i hadn’t touched him in right weeks. I missed evry single inch of him. Missed the way he felt, heavy on top of me, his body on mine, breath against my ears. i missed the way he gripped my waist, the way he felt inside me.

I missed every single thing about him.

Why would he bring another woman into our home?

“Raemi?” Lisa was looking surprised and i tried to get my bearings. I turned to the side and went perfectly still, Taehyung was staring right at her, his pupils blown wide , lips smirking a bit , tongue pushing out into his cheeks in a lewd way as he stared at a woman who wasn’t me and I felt every single bit of hope just shatter to pieces.

. He tilted his head and then suddenly stood up.

“You know what, it’s getting late . Lisa, let me drop you off at your hotel, alright? Rae, baby, I’ll drop her off and get back soon, okay?”

I nodded numbly and watched as he stood up, went over to help her up and then suddenly she was bowing and hugging me and saying that she would love to meet me again. i watched her leave and went still when Taehyung came closer to touch my face , gently.

“Don’t fall asleep. We’ve got a lot to catch up on ” He whispered, voice low and tugging my nerves. I swallowed.

“Okay. “ I said stupidly.

He leaned down and caught my lips in his , arms wrapping around my waist and just warming up so thoroughly that i forgot almost every single thing that had happened , a few minutes ago. i stared at him, my heart and mind at war with each other and now my body rebelling against good sense as well.

What if he’s realized he’s been unfair? What if he wants to make things right? What if this is the second chance you’ve been praying for? Don’t screw this up, it maybe the only chance you get…

“Okay.. Okay.. anything.. Come back soon. I miss you.. i love you so much, Tae, I’m sorry about the past few weeks..i.. I want you so bad..” i was babbling and Taehyung pressed his forefinger to my lips.

“Shh… it’s okay babe. i’ll be right back. Drop her off and i’ll be here , okay?” He kissed the top of my head and then turned around and left.

But he never came back.

~~~~~~~~

I woke up feeling like hell. My eyes swollen, stomach oddly heavy and my entire head pounding so fiercely that my vision blurred. I felt cold, ice cold but i knew my skin was burning up. Whimpering, I fumbled with the edge of the bed, only to realize that i wasn’t on a bed at all.

I was on the bathroom floor.

It took me a second to realize that i’d somehow fallen asleep in the wet floor, my entire body soaked through from the water that was still overflowing out of the tub. Next to me was the bottle of wine that I’d drunk through, sitting and waiting for my lying, cheating husband to come home to me.

i stared at the small bottle of pills, open and scattered on the the floor and I clenched my fists as bits of the previous night flash through my head.

I stumble across the cabinet, throwing it open and fumbling with the prescription pills. I turn on the water in the tub. Publicity, i think crazily, maybe this will be some good publicity for Kim Taehyung’s new movie. . Wife commits suicide while Korea’s golden boy fucks Thai goddess in five star hotel.. How’s that for click bait , tabloid bitches….

I retched at the memory. Some part of my brain had been sane enough not to actually go through with it. Or maybe i had, and i hadn’t taken enough. i couldn’t remeber anything except this mind numbing feeling of betrayal, hurt and despair. I stumbled a bit, tyrying to drag myself upright and I noticed the streaks of blood on the white tile, more dripping out in little spurts from a deep gash on my leg.

Oh , god how did that happen?!

Get the hell out of here before Taehyung gets back.

I grabbed onto the edge of the tub and turned off the water, fumbling with the door to the linen closet and grabbing a fluddy white towel and pressing it against my leg. It stained red, the crimson streaks looking stark against the snow white fabric and i felt like a criminal covering up something hideous as i grabbed a garbage bag and dropped the dirty towel, the pills and the empty bottle of wine into it, before stumbling to the kitchen and dropping it in a corner.

I swallowed and tried to get my bearings. Calling my parents was not an option and i didn’t want to call my brother. He would butcher Taehyung, had never liked him in the first place. But my parents would be heart broken. Sighing, i limped over to the bedroom, grabbing a travel case and quickly tossing in a few changes of clothes. I stared at his side of the closet. The neatly pressed shirt, the jackets , the trousers , the jeans and the t shirts . I touched his shirts the soft fabric reminding me of all the times I’d caressed him through them.

How could you do this to me, Kim Taehyung.

But then I remembered the happy smile he had sported with Lisa and I felt worse. He was happier with another woman and honestly, who was i to demand that he be miserable? If he fell in love with another woman, that was hardly his fault.

The heart wants what the heart wants, right?

I choked on a sob, willing myself not to breakdown completely. I barely finished dragging the bag down to the hall, my fingers already dialling my brother’s number when the front door swung open.

i froze, staring.

it was Taehyung.

He looked wild , hair mussed beyond redemption, dress half undone and I wondered if he’d actually been out in public looking like this?

“Oh, my god.. did you get mugged?” i whispered and he turned heavy, blood shot eyes to me.

“I’m so sorry… Rae… Last night..i…”

I stiffened.

“Don’t say it…” I whispered.

“i was drunk… baby, I’m so sorry…”

“You slept with her didn’t you?” I don’t know why I asked. Did I really want to hear it from him? could I get more masochistic?

“I didn’t mean to.. it was an accident…” He stuttered over the syllables and I felt every single ounce of anger explode inside my head. I t felt like white noise inside my skul, ringing and clear and unbearable.

“I’m so sorry… babe… So sorry. ” He whispered brokenly and my entire world collapsed because I knew.

I knew that he was attracted to that woman . I knew it but , for some horrible horrible reason, i had fully believed that he would resist.

All this time, it was in my head. I kept imagining you with her, in my head but it was just that: imagination. It was a nightmare I was supposed to wake up from, not a nightmare that spilled into reality and broke us.

, …. And I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe that it was true and not just my own imagination. I stepped away from him so fast, I stumbled, my hips hitting the edge of the table. He reached for me instinctively, trying to keep me close but I let out a distressed cry .

“Was she worth it? Was she worth our marriage, Tae? ” I said , stunned. Too stunned to think anymore.

My world was collapsing , the sky was falling and the ground was rushing to meet me at breakneck speed. Breathing was difficult and my heart felt like it was filled with pins and needles, digging into my skin hurting me tearing me apart . I could taste smoke and ash in my mouth, like the burned down fragments of my dreams and my hopes and my futile belief that we were immune to this sort of thing.

I’d never once in a million imagined situations, thought that Taehyung would actually cheat on me.

I had thought that we were safe.

Eight years implied that you were, didn’t it??

It took me another second to realize I was crying horribly. Messily. There’s no beauty in tears really. It started out with you being emotionally hurt and ended with you still being hurt except now you look horrible too.

But the pain. The pain is so real and alive and just… omnipresent.

It’s like someone’s reaching into the most secret places of my heart, slowly grabbing on to my happiness, my joy and everything that made me real, and yanking it out, bit by bit till all that was left was a horrible , constant miserable ache. There are voices inside my head, contradicting ones but one of them is so loud it’s resonating against my skull. And it’s saying the same thing over and over again.

You’re over. Everything you are, Everything you were is over. You don’t exist anymore.

“Rae Mi.. Rae Mi…” He pulled me up and into a sitting position and only then did i realize that I’d sunk to the floor. And then I looked up at him and he waslooking back with a gaze that was entirely too heartbreaking to watch.

He’s looking at me with that lost expression on his face, the one I’d never been able to resist. The one that tugged on all my heartstrings. The one that just screamed, I’m sorry I messed up but I don’t know how to make it right and I almost fell for it.

I almost reached out and said something completely damning like It’s okay, Tae Tae. i still love you.

I could see him doing that thing he always did. Look for the positive aspect in the situation. He was carefully sifting through the wreckage of our now ruined and destroyed marriage, trying to pick on something that could be salvaged and brought back to life. And his eyes, they softened and it seemed like he’d finally found the answer to the entire debacle.

And then he opened his mouth and said the words that I’d wanted so badly to hear last night .

“I love you…” He choked out. “ It’s over…”

And my entire heart body and soul rejected it so strongly I did something I’d never in a million years thought myself capable of doing.

I hit him , right across the face.

“I want a divorce.” I said dully.

He froze in place like I’d shot him .

And then very, very carefully he shook his head.

“No.” He said clearly.

I stood still, my entire body trembling in anger and helpless fury. It was an odd sort of feeling wanting to hurt someone and wanting to make them feel the exact same thing you’re feeling . It shows you just how cruel you really are, when your mind searches frantically for the most hurtful phrases you can throw at his face to make him feel the same soul-numbing agony you’re feeling right now.

“How could you …” I stopped short , my vision blurring from how much i hurt.

“We’re going to get through this.” He whispered, holding a hand out, anguish written all over his face.

I stared at him in disbelief.

“There is no We…” I choked…

“No matter what it takes, babe. I’m going to make it right. Please. Please…” He whispered.

I stared at him, desperately trying to tamp down the voice that wanted to scream No!

I look at him and I see my entire past and future embedded in those laugh lines , the lingering mark of a billion kisses on the corner of his mouth and the hundred times he’d cried , so easily and so unabashedly out of happiness and sorrow both. The times when he’d thread his fingers with mine and kiss me sweetly. The way he’d looked at me and said his wedding vows.

Rae, I’ll never want to hurt you. If I do, just know it would never be intentional.

So vulnerable, my husband.

My husband.

“Okay.” I said , long forgetting what the question was or what I was agreeing to.

Or maybe I just said what I wanted.

I wanted it to be okay.

#bts taehyung #bts fanfics

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