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m4gp13 · 3 years

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For those of you who made it through my laughably incoherent ethabaster think piece, here’s some hc’s, you’ve earned them:

- Ethan has sole possession of their one shared brain cell. Alabaster is not allowed to even look at it. This is because they used to have two but Al broke the good one trying to blow up something (probably Percy).

- If Al finds out Ethan left without some form of magical protection i.e. a sigil, a crystal, ground eggshells, he will be pretty much vibrating with nerves until Ethan gets back so he can give him a once-over.

- Alabaster’s from a very witchy family who all worship Hecate for many reasons that differ depending on which estranged relative you ask and they all kinda saw Al as the first coming of witch Christ so he had a lot of expectations at a very young age.

- Ethan knows this and tries to lift as much Titan army business off his shoulders as possible.

- He accidentally lifts too much off to the point where he is drowning in work and is now the one in need of saving. But does he tell anyone that if he looks at one more stack of demands from his mile long list of bosses he’s going to cry for five hours? Of course not don’t be ridiculous.

- Alabaster immediately hated Percy as soon as he heard the guys name but due to the arena stuff and telling Thalia not to k*ll him Ethan actually held a bit of respect for Percy which annoyed Al to no end.

-This was until the not-so-peaceful peace talk in tlo when Percy starts shit talking Nemesis and Ethan just internally goes “actually the witch bitch was right this guy sucks ass”

-However, under no circumstances will Ethan ever tell this to Alabaster; not because he values his pride (he has none) but because he knows the life of a demigod is short and he doesn’t want to spend the rest of his very short one hearing Al rub that one thing in his face for every single second of it.

- And I mean Every. Single. Second.

- So yeah he takes that to the grave and doesn’t even tell anyone in the underworld in case they tell Al when he dies and he doesn’t want to spend the rest of his afterlife with Al being a dumbass. (also yes Ethan got into Elysium, fuck you)

- (Actually I have another idea about where Ethan went post-life but that’s so far from canon it’s more of an AU than a headcanon so we’re gonna leave that out for now)

- Al thought he was the one in charge of the Hecate kids because he was the most powerful and the highest ranking in the army but he was Not. That was Ethan. The Hecate kids thought Ethan was their unofficial adopted baby brother but little did they know he was the mum the whole time.

- Ethan is the only thing standing between them and starving to death. He also does the younger kids hair and gives everyone with long hair super intricate braids that stay out of their faces during “field work”. Al thinks this is more of him trying to take the weight off his shoulders but Ethan knows that if he doesn’t do this shit no one will so he kinda has to. Not that he doesn’t like doing it. being helpful is his love language.

- Because of their powers over the mist the Hecate kids of the army were notorious pranksters who were usually at war with the Hermes kids (wars usually declared by Al because he rolled a zero on self restraint) but none of them prank Ethan because “nooooo you can’t do him he babey 🥺”

- Ethan has simply decided that what the magic prank wizards don’t know can’t hurt them and just turns to his blind side whenever he sees them sneaking off the ship to get Micky D’s in the middle of the night to stay on their good sides.

- Speaking of the ship, Ethan thinks it’s the dumbest thing in the world that one of their most powerful demigod enemies is the son of a sea god and he actually has a pretty decent relationship with said sea god and their main base of operations aside from mt Othrys is a fucking BOAT. He tells Al all about his worries for the ship and while Al assures him that nothing that bad could happen he always makes sure that the ship always has the least amount of demigods on board at all times just in case.

- It takes all the strength Ethan has not to yell “TOLD YOU SO” at him when the ship blows up.

- Al probably either wears basic white boy clothes or typical witchy stuff (like moons and shit) depending his mood meanwhile Ethan found out about leather and just goes for it.

- Every grunge/punk/emo/eboy/teachwear bitch aspires to be him and because he aint about all that “gender roles” bs he definitely goes about wearing cool egirl stuff too. Not just slightly feminine shaped jumpers but all the plaid skirts, fishnets and lace trimmed dresses he can steal afford and Al, despite his more basic fashion taste is here for it. You’ve never seen someone more supportive of their pals fits, get you a hypeman like Al. You deserve it. (Ethan is also not afraid to walk around in a full pastel gamer girl fit)

- (Also Al hyping up one Ethans fits in front of a Titan is the reason they were allowed to start wearing army fatigues instead of the whole ancient Greek armour on occasion)

- Ethan appreciates Al’s enthusiasm but he also kinda doesn’t get it. And he definitely doesn't do that “yeah you’re right I DO look good” thing because he just doesn’t know how. He’d always been a little self-conscious about getting a big head but then he found out about Nemesis and hubris and all that fun stuff, looked at his meager pile of self worth and said “ yep, this has to go”

- Al almost starts crying when he finds out and pretty much makes it mission to be such a good hype man that Ethan has no choice but to think of himself as a Pretty Cool Dude via absorbing the hype through diffusion. It kinda starts working but then Ethan [REDACTED] in tlo so we’ll never know what could’ve been.

- To nick a hc from someone ( hi @chromarozee-spam) contrary to his taste in clothes Ethan does ballet (he was a punk AND did ballet, what more can I say?) and while Al tries to support his hobbies he is genuinely afraid both for and of him. “For” because “holy fuck that looks painful are you okay?”. And “of” because “are you sure those are bones inside you because I don’t think bones are supposed do that?!”.

- Ethan tries to assure him that no his spine is not made of rubber, broken bones or otherworldly materials so can he stop bothering him during practice please?

- This does not stop Al from making a million protection wards and constantly asking his deck if Ethan is indeed a Being of this Good Green Earth.

- Eventually his cards pretty much just tell him that he is friends with one bendy heck of a boi and he needs to fucking get over it so he kinda just,, ,,,,, , does.

- Again with the hc thieving (this time from @altorringtons) Al learning to use a two-handed broadsword so he can guard Ethan’s blind side and back in a fight *soft noises* just them trying so hard to keep each other alive because they love each other and they care about each other!

- They also sleep in the same bed whenever they get the chance (fully clothed ya nasties, they’re kids) and they just hug each other soooo tight because they just need to know they’re alright cos they always get pretty banged up in fights against campers or just monsters that are too much like wild animals to recruit. (What? Me? Projecting my desire to be intimately held by the closest person I have to family with their arms wrapped not tight enough to make me uncomfortable but tight enough to make me feel loved? Never! What on earth are you talking about?)

- Because Al is super stubborn and prideful whenever they have an argument Al can’t really bring himself to say he’s sorry so when he’s ready to apologise he just climbs into bed on Ethan’s blind side and cuddles him because he knows Ethan is super worried about getting attacked on his blind side so it’s like he has a guard or a shield.

- Ethan on the other hand just calls him a Rock Boy in a derogatory way until he gets over himself and apologizes but he really does love the fact that Al knows that about him and accommodates that.

- The thing they fight about most is how “heroic” the titan army is. Kronos’ brainwashing worked on Al like a charm and he fully believes that they are the rebellion and camp is the empire. Ethan on the other hand wasn’t at camp long enough for Kronos or Luke to really do anything but it doesn’t matter because Ethan really doesn’t give a shit if he’s on the “evil side” cos he just wants respect and he’s willing to do what it takes without a second thought of how people see him. If he thinks he’s doing the right thing but on the wrong side he can live with that but Al needs to feel like all of his side is on the moral high ground because that’s what Kronos drilled into his brain.

- Ethan knows that Al delusional when it comes to the non-existent heroics of the army but eventually he just decides to let Al believe the titans lies because that’s easier for him even if it hurts Ethan to see him being manipulated like that.

- Due to Ethan not giving a shit on the humanity of his bosses he gets punished a lot more often and a lot more violently than Al because they know that Ethan already knows they don’t care about him so they don’t have to sugar coat him but Al still believes that they’re heroes and his mindset needs to stay like that to keep him obedient.

- Also because I am a Cruel Person By Nature I hc Ethan’s mortal family (which usually just consists of his dad) as meeting a not very pg13 end at the hands of a monster who wanted to nible on Ethan a tad which pretty much scarred him for life.

- SO, at the end of the battle of Man Hats Are In when Al looks around and sees that his whole family (that joined the titans) are dead! oh no! How sad! At least he knows someone whose been through the same thing so they understand each other and can help each other through this tough time together right? SIKE!

- so yeah Al learns Ethan d-worded in the worst possible way at the worst possible time and just looses it from grief. Loosing his family was bad enough but finding out he lost the one person he thought he would be able to confide in and heal with immediately after just really rubs salt in the wound.

- When the survivors start re-grouping to find someplace to hide until the gods forget about them Al just wanders off because it’s all he can do to not break down on the spot.

- He’s just wandering in a daze for a while and most people just assume he’s high but he snaps out of it and gets into anger mode when Lamia starts attacking him because he finally has something to do and occupy himself with even though it’s hard not to think about his sibling especially when Lamia keeps talking like they never would have died if she’d been in charge which is why she should totally just kill him and lead their siblings instead.

- His desire to have something to keep his mind off his family and Ethan is the first thing he thinks about when Claymore re-alives and immediately starts talking about doing research (yeah because that’s what you need after a long stressful day of fighting monsters and literally dying).

- Ethan keeps trying to cross the veil and help, even if he just sends Al a pleasant dream to help him sleep but contrary to what you might think from the name, the veil is really hard to cross so Ethan just has to bite his nails and watch his friend suffer.

- It gets easier to watch after Al and Claymore pretty much adopt each other because at least he has someone but they do still get into pretty scary situations.

- When they were both premortem they got paired up for a lot of missions for the titan army and they usually just tried to pretend they were on a fun road trip around America when they could and make fun of mortal shit together.

- At one point they were in a motel and the last people accidentally left behind one of Claymore’s books about death and they found it the funniest thing ever. Between a pair of in which one of their mum’s regularly goes to the underworld and one has been there himself they find mortal ideas of the afterlife to be very amusing.

- Alabaster has decided he would not like to share this with the class (Claymore) thank you very much.

- Also when they’re doing their road tripping Ethan knows all the best places to crash, the cheapest food places and the local gangs don’t bother them because between running away from camp and joining the army he just wandered around a lot.

- Like he’d just hop on a random train, take a nap and figure it out when he wakes up; he made a lot of friends this way too as well as his taste in clothes cos he didn’t have a lot of money so he’d just DIY some second hand punk shit. Al thinks he’s the Gandalf of the demigod world because he just knows everyone who might help them and everywhere they could spend the night. He definitely tells his siblings about Ethan being the closest thing they have to a wandering wizard and they fucking love it.

- Also because Nemesis tends to not have a lot of kids Ethan was the only one of hers in the army and Al felt really bad for him because his sibling were his favourite part about the army so he tried to include Ethan in as much as possible with his siblings.

- As an unexpected result Ethan ended up with a small army of super powered children to sick on the people who keep making jabs about him loosing in the arena battle.

- Al sometimes thinks he’s given him too much power but also he will fuck a bitch up if they make fun of his pals so he sees where his siblings are coming from and yeah those bitches had it coming. He also has a copy of bitchcraft.

- Ethan’s dad was the type to play “Stay With Me” by Miki Matsubara on repeat for hours and Ethan would probably enjoy the song but he’s heard it so often that now it makes his ears bleed and Al sometimes tortures him with for fun until Ethan starts throwing shit.

- To steal another hc from @chromarozee-spam Ethan has a thing for cats and one time Al accidentally gave himself mistform cat-ears and Ethan could not stop touching them. Ethan was just craning his head back uncontrollably grinning so much his face hurt. Al can’t bring himself to be upset because Ethan rarely ever smiles since he joined the army.

- Al saw Ethan crying over one of those video’s where people put their hoodies on backwards and put their cat in the hood so he made a mist cat and bought him a hoodie. Ethan of course started crying again but it was happy tears instead.

- Ethan is fucking tiny while Al is almost a foot taller than him. He wouldn’t mind so much if Al didn’t exhaust every opportunity to rub it in his face so he just starts climbing all over shit (especially tall buildings) half to give Al heart attacks and half so he can be like “Sorry? What was that? I’m so high up I can’t hear you. Can you speak up a little? Maybe get a ladder? Or taller?”

- Also I don’t know why but I hc Al as Texan. Ethan gets told about this “Alabaster C. Torrington” guy who knows latin, incantations and other magical knowledge and expects some fancy British guy so when they meet and Al speaks Ethan gets whiplash so hard he fuckin chokes.

- Al is also very casual and Ethan is pretty professional so when he meets this magic general with a straight back and the first thing that comes out of this assholes mouth is some “Howdy y’all!!” bullshit he just dies on the spot.

- Also because Al is texan he is very sensitive to the cold (I’m about 80% sure that Texas is one of the Warm states) so when he has to do stuff in cold places like the labyrinth or new york (idk about that one to but in every film I’ve seen that’s set in NY it’s raining for about 90% of the time) he complains about being freezing all the time until Ethan helpfully reminds him that he can literally make fire out of nothing, surely he can find a way to warm himself up.

- Ethan is also sensitive to the cold because he’s basically malnourished but he’s been like that for a while and thinks it’s normal so he sucks it up until Al notices he’s always cold. Ethan tells him it’s fine but Al is basically a walking electric blanket so whenever Al cuddles him to keep him warm Ethan can’t help but melt because he’s so fucking warm and soft and have you noticed I crave intimacy?

- Ethan started studying Greek myths vigorously since he found out he was a demigod and when he died he kept an eye and an ear out for Al because even though he wouldn’t be able to do anything it still reassures him to know what’s going on, HOWEVER, he was almost filled with enough malice to rip through the barrier between the living and the dead purely to beat an ass when he hears Al’s little “I don’t bother reading about worthless monsters like you!” jab.

- Ethan is very jumpy and fidgety to the point where Al is genuinely concerned and while Ethan assures Al that nothing’s wrong Al is still suspicious. Ethan probably would have told Al about it if it was because of anything but Kronos but seeing that it mostly is, he doesn’t because Ethan feels like Al will just take Kronos’ word over his and he’ll loose the only person he trusts in the army.

- Al doesn’t find out about it until way after the war when Kronos’ brainwashing starts to come undone because by then his mindset is a lot less biased in the titans favour so he can see things that he just unconsciously ignored before and is able to put two and two together. When he does boy is it a trip.

- Ethan is really bad at talking about feelings and stuff so whenever Al gets upset over something and Ethan has no idea how to talk to him he’ll just get him some rocks. One time Ethan found out about those heart shaped valentine boxes that are normally filled with chocolates but people put crystals in them and that just became his go-to for when Al was especially upset.

- Al is only slightly better at talking about stuff but he can still get Ethan to open up to him which is good because Ethan isn’t very materialistic so it’s hard to make him feel better by buying him things and because someone needs to get Ethan to express himself in an emotionally healthy way.

- Also because of this they just can’t tell each other they love each other. Like they’ll barely whisper it when the other is asleep because they’re just so bad at talking about feelings. It wasn’t that much of an issue until after the war and Ethan gets k-worded and Al is left alone and sobbing over all the times he never told his loved ones how much they meant to him.

- But because this is a headcanon list; fuck that, Al saved Ethan with some sort of magic bullshit and they talk about how much they love each other all the time now because they can’t stand the thought of one of them dying having never been told how much they are loved.

#me going around nicking hcs: thank you for your sacrifices #this will help tremendously in the war effort #also max i am extremely pleased to tell you that auto correct thinks Harrington is a lovely name for you #and you stan the magic messiah #autocorrect didn't say that one #but it's true #pjo #percy jackson #ethan nakamura #alabaster torrington #alabaster c torrington #ethan x alabaster #ethabaster

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pleasereadmeok · 3 years

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Matthew Scene by Scene - Episode 5 # 11 Daddy.

Spoilers if you haven’t seen ADOW season 2 episode 5

Sorry this is a LONG one. : ( But ... Philippe...

Matthew catches the first sight of his father and it’s a poignant moment. It is so dark ^ but you can see the slightly wistful look on Matthew’s face. Despite everything that Philippe put Matthew through when he was alive, you can see that his ‘son’ loves him and seeing him again must be the biggest head f**k imaginable.

I’ve already admitted that I wasn’t sure about James Purefoy as Philippe, mainly because of my own inability to separate him from the bloke who jokes around with Matthew Goode on The Wine Show, but as soon as he drawls Explain yourself - I was hooked.

Straight away you can feel that Philippe is a strange one. That vaguely Greek accent adds to the transformation. [ He was around in Ancient Greece so spoke with a Greek-ish accent.]

Matthew is stunned into silence until Philippe turns to face them. Well?

Matthew steps forward to hand Philippe his coin.

I’m here as commanded.

Matthew gives the slightest bow of his head.

Philippe does a slight snort - That’s is your explanation?

It feels like when a teenager comes home late and has to explain why. Look at Diana. She’s giving off guilty vibes.

Matthew looks like he is being hauled over the fire by his headteacher and slips into snarky defensiveness -

I’m sure your spies have told you everything else you need to know.

Philippe counters - you should have told me yourself about your witch.

Woah - straight to it then. Diana defends herself - you can’t intimidate me coz I am a weaver. Oh shit - Matthew’s face - oh god what is she going to say? He is like a powerless spectator as Diana and Philippe go at it.

Philippe is all - oh yeah, you expect me to be impressed. I’m VERY old so I’ve seen it all and you have only read history books. So one up to me.

But our Witchy Woman is not backing down. Matthew’s head snaps round so quick coz, oh crap, she’s gonna spill the beans. Diana he warns...

Oh yeah - she’s done it now. Future Diana is out of the bag.

Philippe gets it immediately. ‘You seem out of place, Matthaios’

Diana takes up the story again and confirms Philippe’s suspicions. Seriously, Matthew must be screaming inside SHUT UP!!! But Philippe gets it.

Oh no - Diana ain’t stopping... and it all comes out - basically her whole life story in a nutshell. Complication upon complication.

But whatever - I LOVE MATTHEW AND HE LOVES ME. SO DEAL WITH IT DAD!

Matthew is panicking - you can see it in his face as his eyes dart back and forth between Diana and daddy.

Please don’t doubt my feelings for Diana.

Oh no - Matthew’s humongous secret number 1 is coming and is it just me that gets the impression that Philippe is enjoying the fact that he is about to blow them apart? Philippe goes in for the kill. You ain’t mated coz you ain’t shagged her.

Wow RUDE! So their scents are separate. What is he saying - that there’s no sex smell? What? That is the mother of all parental interference right there. Matthew is begging for Philippe to stop. That’s enough. But the damage is done. Diana is pissed. Matthew has rejected her attempts to get him to do the deed and he has resisted. Why has Matthew been lying to her? WTF is going on?

Philippe is properly evil now. He’s totally aware of what he has done but continues to mock his son. You’re tired. Oh but Philippe isn’t finished yet and pulls the old my house/ my rules card. So don’t expect to share a bed if you aren’t wed.

Philippe is so SMUG! And I know that look on Matthew’s face. That is a terminally mortified teenager whose parent has just asserted unreasonable authority - I HATE YOU! Sure - Matthew should have been honest with Diana but way to go daddy - you just f**ked your son over. What a bastard.

So that’s Matthew’s Humungous Secret Number 1 out of the bag. He and Diana are not really mated until he’s shagged her. Just 3 more big secrets to go ... can’t wait.

I can’t help thinking back to when Matthew first took Diana back to Sept Tours and his almost petulant announcement that Diana will be sleeping in MY tower. How things have changed - 400 years earlier.

[pics - ADOW S2:05 edits and unedited screenshots]

#matthew goode #a discovery of witches #adow #adows2 #adow spoilers #teresa palmer #james purefoy

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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fandom-blackhole · 3 years

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My dear, you need to chill out because you are working magic in here. And what is this star wars inception moment going on. You ascended beyond the levels of higher plane.

Okay there are is this possibilities why Grogu tried to jump out from the stroller,

He remembered a scene from the action movie he watched with uncle Boba the other day,

Crest better watch out or Grogu will try to pull off Anakin jumping out the window in aotc,

Paz is a goofball who would simply name his chihuahua THE DOG,

Turns out pupper's name is Ad'ika,

Paz is a fan of sw as well and figured out since his dog is tiny, why not?

You and Paz doing Chewie and Leia cosplay,

Uncle Boba wants to buy Grogu real BB-8 used on the set,

But kiddo is only interested in this green hunter's merch,

Paz is a astrological freak, that's why he gave Grogu that book and the telescope,

Paz was taught in the army how to navigate by stars,

But now, selfcare king will tell you your exact rising and moon sign on demand,

Also tea-leaf-reading??

Paz is all about exploring different cultures, of course cuisines being the priority,

On the topic of food, Paz has a sweet tooth,

His fav treat?

Let's say you + whipped cream,

You both also tried thing called nyotaimori,

See, that's why he loves studying other cultures, there's always something interesting to learn...

Boba and you totally wrestled atop of huge dollar stacks after heist went according to plan,

He also, would like, casually, out of the blue would hijack you from work, take you onto his private jet and grant you a gateway vacation on his private island,

Also he likes to wrestle with you in his black lamborghini aventador,

There is not much space, so you have to get really close to each other,

Din is a sucker for massages,

He is constantly exhausted, spending all day running after little kiddos,

He especially loves nuru massage,

Overall, as a natural caregiver he only wants to give, he is truly selfless,

So you praise him, take care of him, hold him close and he gets all flustered,

But sometimes he can act differently,

Especially when you tease him about this Pedro guy,

Then he proves to you way he is better than some actor geared up in tin can,

Head heavy with thots now - 🐣

Listen I fucking live for shit like this, I couldn't stop my galaxy brain if I tried lmao jk, buuutttt.....

Ok so first off before I forget (God forbid) here are some things I thought about before answer this....

Paz taking you camping in the mountains of Colorado!!!! He takes you hiking and you go up the trolley to the top of Pikes Peak

Also, Paz knows the stars yea? Well STARGAZING with him while in Colorado!!!

Wrestling 👀👀 in your shared sleeping bag with Paz at night to 'stay warm'

Also, Paz + tattoos? Yes, no, maybe?

Now, how about a trip to the zoo with Din and Grogu???

Grogu's favorite exhibit is obviously the amphibians with all of the frogs and toads

Letting Grogu feed the giraffes, and letting him into the petting Zoo portion

You and Din look away for one second and the little gremlin is trying to eat the pellets you feed to the goats and you both scream "no!"

Making it up to him by buying him dipndots, specifically blue ones because he has an affinity towards blue things (frog lady's children and the macaroon things)

Buying Grogu the cutest little frog stuffy at the gift shop....

Okay so now to talk about what you sent, sorry I went on a tangent there....

Ok so Grogu running after the frog in season 1, Din jogs past a pond and he gets a glimpse of one and wants to be like anakin jumping onto the Droid except he wants to jump on the frog and catch it

Ad'ika?!?!? Omfg yeeesss its so cute

What about going as Chewing and Leia for Halloween?!?!?

And alternatively, making Din dress as the mandalorian, grogu as baby yoda, and you go as Omera????

What would Boba and reader go as though 🤔🤔🤔 (king and queen?angel and devil?1940s gangster and femme fatale?)

Paz being wiccan/pagan/witchy is so fucking gooooodddd

The second you gave your big three to Paz he K N E W you were the one

PAZ IS A KITCHEN WITCH!!!!! OMFG

Paz eating whipped cream off of you? 103820/10 fucking A M A Z ING

Now, I had no idea what nyotaimori was, but, fuck yeeeeess, he totally loves that

Also Paz enjoys trying foods that other cultures says are aphrodisiacs

Boba and you wrestling on top of a pile of money, god damn that is an image I didn't know I needed, but fuck did I

Boba totally steals you at the worst moments to take you to his private island, but he always makes it up to you *wink wink*

Boba always picks out your swim suits, just wanted to add that

Christening every single one of Boba's cars in every way possible, ESPECIALLY the black Lamborghini aventador

Din's back KILLS him from carrying tiny, but heavy, children around all day

Din loves when you use oils that smell of vanilla (idk why it just sounds right)

Nuru massage?!?! Fuck yes

He totally melts when you just rub on him like that, especially if its been a hard day....

Now, after you keep teasing him about this mother fucking Pedro dude, oh boy does he get revenge

The S E C O N D Grogu is asleep he has you pushed into the bed asking 'if that Pedro Pascal dude could take care of you like this'

.......

I just had a really bad thought.....

So Paz loves children, yeah, and he's always wanted a big family

But what if, when he got older he found out he was impotent, and couldn't have kids of his own?

So thats why he does so much with the children in the community and teaching Din's class once a month, because he's trying to fill that hole

Anywayyyyyy im gonna go cry about this part in particular......

(SEND ME THOTS!!!)

#🐣 anon #modern au #din djarin x reader #din x reader #boba fett x reader #boba x reader #paz vizsla x reader #paz x reader

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sunlightandsuffering · 3 years

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K but I’m thinking about witch Mikasa who lives in a small town and controls the weather, does spooky shit in her spare time. And city boy Eren who used to live there when he was younger coming back bc he left to live with his dad when his parents divorced, does NOT want to be there falls in love with witchy Mika 😭

I’m sorry I’m listening to Rhiannon and honestly those are the vibes 😪

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tiny-crecher · 4 years

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Yknow i love my gf (and bf but this story isnt about him) but sometimes,,,, we were talking about tattoos we wanna get and I wanted to draw us 1 tattoo to symbolize our relationship. She asked "what if we incorporate wicca stuff into our relationship".... ..... .... im the only one practicing (currently, our bf is trying to start). She has described her aesthetic or some clothes as "wicca".... i,,,,

y i k e s

wicca...... isn’t even an aesthetic. Like what does that mean?? do you mean witchy? Do you mean Celtic? Because neither of those things are inherently Wiccan.

Just.... maybe politely inform her that that’s not how it works? and maybe to stop talking about shit she doesn’t know much about (since you said she does not practice)

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nerdwithabirb · 4 years

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what your ssbu main says about you (not including dlc)

01. mario: you’re either a basic bitch or really old.

02. donkey kong: you like cheap movesets like grabs because then you don’t have to put in actual effort.

03. link: you’re a basic bitch with a love of elven/fantasy type characters.

04. samus: you either really like metroid, or you just think the mech suit looks neat.

04e. dark samus: see above. possibly going through a divorce.

05. yoshi: you might eat a lot.

06. kirby: see above.

07. fox: you’re either a fox main because of his laser gun, or you’re a furry.

08. pikachu: pikachu is the only pokémon you actually recognise.

09. luigi: you were the underdog growing up. probably a younger sibling.

10. ness: from the bottom of my heart, fuck you. i will never be able to unhear “PK FIRE!!” in that FUCKING voice.

11. captain falcon: i’ve never seen a captain falcon main who was familiar with f-zero, they just thought the falcon! punch! thing is cool.

12. jigglypuff: jjiggly is broken like genuinely broken (especially in ssb4), so you must REALLY like the character.

13. peach: you are probably someone’s non-gamer gf and only picked peach because she’s cute.

13e. daisy: you’re probably at least somewhat familiar with the mario series, but you also probably think that being a daisy main makes you “quirky” somehow.

14. bowser: see entry for donkey kong. spamming grab attacks is cheap as fuck. stop it.

15. ice climbers: another game that most of the mains are completely unfamiliar with. also, having to fight two characters at once is annoying as hell. you like to watch the world suffer.

16. sheik: you probably think maining sheik makes you “mysterious” even though she’s been in the series forever and anyone familiar with legend of zelda knows she’s just zelda in disguise. however, she has decent melee attacks, so credit where credit is due i suppose.

17. zelda: you like the ~magical girl~ aesthetic but think wicca is demonic.

18. dr. mario: if you actually know dr. mario, great. if not, you probably wanted a “quirky” version of mario.

19. pichu: pichu is literally just a more asshole version of pikachu. so you either know that and use it to your advantage, or you just think pichu is cute.

20. falco: you got bored of using fox.

21. marth: you have a thing for slightly androgynous swordfighters.

21e. lucina: androgynous wasn’t doing it for you.

22. young link: you miss link’s old moveset.

23. ganondorf: your tabletop game of choice is d&d and you’re probably the dungeon master most of the time.

24. mewtwo: you think mewtwo is as close to goku as smash can ever get.

25. roy: you have a thing for redheads.

25e. chrom: you have a thing for emo kids.

26. mr. game & watch: you probably don’t know what a game & watch is and just like the huge assortment of attacks.

27. meta knight: edgelord supreme. you were probably a goth kid at one point and might still be.

28. pit: you main pit because his flight ability gives you plenty of mercy when you inevitably get knocked off the stage.

28e. dark pit: you think dark pit is somehow better because he is wearing black.

29. zero suit samus: you pause the game to masturbate to her when you’re playing alone. we all know this.

30. wario: you laugh at fart jokes a lot.

31. snake: you probably own one or more of the following: gadsden flag, something with a punisher skull, one or more guns.

32. ike: see entry for marth.

33-35. pokémon trainer: you like to think you’re unpredictable, but end up doing one of the same few things.

36. diddy kong: you’re one of the rare few who actually knows how the fuck to use diddy. please show me your ways.

37. lucas: like ness, but worse. fuck you but even more.

38. sonic: you’re a hardcore sonic fan and probably fall off the stage a lot. you might be one of the weirdos who lewd him.

39. king dedede: you’re annoying as hell and like to get in people’s way.

40. olimar/alph: you like to piss off as many people at once as you possibly can and just slowly sap away their will to live.

41. lucario: you’re either a hardcore pokémon fan, or you think the idea of a ninja fox dog looking thing is sensual.

42. r.o.b.: lol does anyone main r.o.b.? if you do, you probably have a massive retro game collection and i salute you for that.

43. toon link: you either like wind waker, or you just enjoy the cutesy aesthetic.

44. wolf: like the fox mains, but edgier. probably kind of a dick in real life.

45. villager: you were the kid who chased everyone around and perpetuated the cheese touch/cooties/etc. on the playground.

46. mega man: you are either insanely cool, or you like little boys. no in between.

47. wii fit trainer: you started to main him/her (depending on alt costume) as a joke, but it just grew on you. you’re probably a health nut.

48. rosalina and luma: you totally bought into the galaxy hair trend.

49. little mac: you like to convince people to play punchies.

50. greninja: you make up a lot of bullshit excuses to get out of things.

51-53. mii fighters: you either started using them for shits and giggles and have several miis of celebs and characters, or you’re so self-centred that you jumped on the opportunity to be in a game that wasn’t called “wii _____.”

54. palutena: you’re horny for witchy girls. that, or you started as a zelda main and then graduated, so to speak.

55. pac-man: you like minimalist interior design and probably have an oral fixation.

56. robin: you are, or were, a potterhead.

57. shulk: you probably just think his weapon is neat, admit it.

58. bowser jr.: you’re a HUGE nintendo fan, and can probably name all of the koopalings by heart. (so basically me in fourth grade, lol)

59. duck hunt: you like to fight dirty and then laugh in the face of your opponent after you use cheap tactics, both in and out of smash.

60. ryu: if you ever played street fighter, he was always your main. you’re probably a real ride or die type of person.

60e. ken: you think ryu is too mainstream.

61. cloud: you really like jrpgs.

62. corrin: again with the being horny for the same sort of character.

63. bayonetta: you either are a big tiddy goth gf, or you’re a slobby neckbeard with no hope of getting a big tiddy goth gf.

64. inkling: you probably took up painting as a hobby at least once.

65. ridley: you think dragons are awesome. sadly, ridley kinda sucks in smash.

66. simon: you’re either a deus vult sort of racist, or you have a bdsm kink.

66e. richter: you most probably have a bdsm kink and are very likely to be ex-religious. you probably still reference god in everyday speech because it’s hard to stop doing that (“oh my god,” “i swear to god,” etc.).

67. king k. rool: you laugh at “expand dong” in 2020.

68. isabelle: you enjoy cheap fighting tactics, but also the kawaii aesthetic.

69 (nice). incineroar: you’re a hardcore pokémon fan. shame that incineroar kinda sucks as a fighter.

#ssbu #smash ultimate #shitpost #mad dog is bored

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fishflakesims · 4 years

Note

for joel: 01, 50 👀, 49, 40, 21

01. What does your character’s name mean? Did you pick it for the symbolism, or did you just like the way it sounded?

alright let's break this shit down:

JOEL - it was the first name that popped up when i randomized the name so i could save my progress on him. initially i thought joel was just kind of a funny name for him i decided to keep it but since then i've grown really fond of it and can't imagine a different first name for him. backstory-wise, though, he picked a name that was similar to his deadname because his grandfather named him so he's sentimental about it. what's his deadname, you may be wondering? that's between me, joel, and whatever god he believes in.

JESSUP - i wanted something that flowed well plus i love me some good alliteration and since i wanted close friends to call him J.J. basically i just looked up "boy" names until i found something i liked. also it was his grandfather's name; the two of them were really close before he died so he wanted to include his grandfather's name in his. plus his dead(middle)name was one of his grandmother's and it just made sense to him.

GREENWOOD - i don't even know if this is actually a last name I'm just so fucking awful with surnames and i needed something that sounded pretty and vaguely witchy.

21. What is one of your character’s biggest fears? How would they react when dealing with this fear?

ok so I'd like to start this off by saying literally everything scares this man. but being a general fraidy cat + anxiety + years of being bullied will make you jumpy. more specifically tho he's terrified of anything happening to his loved ones.

his reaction depends on what exactly the Bad Thing is. typically when he's stressed he acts grouchy and chain smokes or on rare occasion drinks. if the person did something completely stupid and got hurt or into trouble, he gets pissy like he's relieved still that they're okay but the moment he spots them? instant running to tackle them full-force with a hug while simultaneously yelling and bitching them out for being so reckless and dumb. and then he might go off somewhere to knit and grumble under his breath for a really long time while he works on his anger issues. but if it's really, really bad tho he'd probably shut down emotionally and get drunk or at the very least smoke like a chimney at an industrial plant. he'd probably lock himself up in his room at some point and turn music up really loud so he can vent to his goldfish, cleo, in privacy. also the music would help drown out his crying if he actually ended up crying, which he never does so when he does he ends up sobbing so hard it shakes his whole body violently and his wailing practically sounds like screaming and he ends up getting sick and throwing up really hard (and also loudly. what a noisy bitch.)

so basically not well? HFGDGDGFD

40. Does your OC have any guilty pleasures they enjoy? Hobbies, past times, music, etc that they wouldn’t want known by others?

Joel's a bit of a snob, specifically with his choice in reading material. he loves to read classic literature and things like shakespearean plays and old ass poetry. his favorite genres are romance and horror, and if he had it his way he'd have you believe the most modern author he's into is stephen k*ng but actually I'm here to expose him for loving trash romance novels!! he likes those books with shirtless men on the front that are basically just poorly written, super self-indulgent smut, but his favorite is stuff like nicholas sp*rks novels. joel also enjoys a "good" romcom and "chick" flicks, but no one can ever know. and super cheesy love songs from the 60s & 70s? he's got dozens of compilation cassettes & cds. he keeps his stash of all this stuff in a shoebox underneath his bed like he's a teenager trying to hide skin mags from his parents 😭 he's ridiculous i love him

49. What is something that your character has nightmares about? Are these frequent? Do they heavily affect your character’s mood?

joel has a fair amount of nightmares but he can't remember 99% of them. normally he just wakes up screaming, in a cold sweat and nearly hyperventilating from anxiety. the little snippets he remembers aren't very clear and they're more like blurry images that he can't discern and a feeling of dread & suffocation. afterwards he stays up for the rest of the night and will go for a swim if possible or go outside to look at the water. sometimes he'll lose track of time when he's doing this and he'll just be sitting there for hours before realizing how long it's been and then going back in the house. he's usually grumpier after having one but he's also more quiet and subdued, not nearly as flamboyant and loud as he normally is. if you ask him about it tho he'll say he's fine and if you push it he'll get snippy with you.

50. If your character confessed love to their crush, partner, etc, what would they say?

oh fuck telling people how you feel when you can just pine after them for secretly for years with only your best friend knowing you're in love with him because he knows how you act about every other guy except this one. no but for real he would just wait for the other person to say it first and if it never happened he'd just keep making heart eyes at them till he dies because he's awful at communicating any feeling outside of angry and horny. if it was confessed to him tho he'd shriek excitedly and throw himself around the other person in like a full body hug. (basically he glomps people. that's truly the only word to describe it.)

#💌#winter's sims #my sims #ts4 #long post #winterinsulani #drug tw #alcohol tw #alright one down!#but I'm open 2 more #joel greenwood

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littlemessyjessi · 5 years

Text

Nikki Sixx (Douglas Booth Version) : ABC Fluffy Headcanons

Fluffy Alphabet (Shoutout to my lovely friend, Traenon! She literally saved these for me months ago from something she read and sent it to me through messenger. So credit to OP for the prompts!)

Nikki Sixx (Douglas Booth version) Headcanons Nikki Sixx x PS Reader X Reader: PS Reader, Plus Size Reader

A = Attractive: what do they find attractive about the other?

You adore his eyes and his passion.

He'd sin for your lips....and the sass passes through them.

B = Baby: do they want a family? why/why not?

Secretly? Yes. But he's terrified of turning into his parents. He's an awesome father though and you know this in your heart. So whether you become actual parents or pet parents- your babies (fur or otherwise) are the luckiest in all the land.

C = Cuddle: how do they cuddle?

At first....NOT. He's just not used to it. He was denied a lot of that kind of thing but eventually his touch starvation gets the best of him. Now he's on you like white on rice.

D = Dates: what are dates with them like?

Usually, he's so fucking nervous he can barely speak. Still. Even after many years you still make him blush and fumble with his words. Poor Nikki- you just make him speechless.

E = Everything: “you are my ____” (e.g my life, my world…)

My best addiction. And it fucking terrifies him sometimes how much he's addicted to you.

F = Feelings: when did they know they were falling in love?

His mother showed up one day. You handled it and honestly he didn't even know she was there until about a month later.

He confronted you about it and asked why you didn't tell him.

You just told him that she didn't deserve his time and that if he ever wanted to talk to her again- you knew he could find her. But that it was his decision...not hers.

Ya boy fell hard right then and there.

G = Gentle: are they gentle? If so, how?

He's so soft. Honestly, he's amazed that you're with him. Sometimes he just reaches out and runs the back of his knuckles down your spine in wonder. It's like he's checking to make sure you're really there and he's not dreaming. Because for the life of him- he can't figure out why/how he ended up so lucky.

H = Hand/Hold: how do they like to hold? how do they like to hold hands?

Constantly. At first he was really weird about it. Now, it's so constant you forget he's even got a hold of you. You've yanked him out of his chair before not thinking about the fact that ya'll were still attatched, lol.

I = Impression: first impression/s

He was a dick but you'd seen worse. He was also completely shit faced. You held his hair while he puked his guts out and rolled him over when he passed out so he wouldn't choke on his own vomit. You made him tea in the morning and watched as he tried to apologize.

J = Joker: are they into pulling pranks?

Too much sometimes. He learned his lesson and your breaking point. He fucked with something you cared about and you straight up left for a few days. It's not like you left him but you just had to step away from the situation before you did something you regretted. He was wrecked when you got home and swore he'd never do that again.

K = Kisses: how do they kiss?

Like I said- at first he was weird about it. Now, he's always sucking your face.

L = Love: who says I love you first?

You did. Well, actually he did it in his sleep all the time. But like for real- you did. He was shocked...and he cried. He'll deny that but he fucking did.

M = Memory: their favourite moment together

You dragging his ass to a roller skate rink. He busted his ass constantly but you were giggling and beautiful and he wouldn't trade it for the world.

N = Nickel: do they spoil? do they buy the person they love everything?

He loves to give you flowers. Whether they're weeds or roses- you light up and he loves it so much.

O = Orange: what color reminds them of their other half?

Blue. It's sweet and peaceful. But like the sky- it can turn dark and stormy in a moment. You're not to be fucked with...and he fucking loves you for it.

P = Pet names: what pet names do they use?

Baby. He's always been that way with you. Sometimes Babydoll if he's trying to get his way. And he fucking adores when you call him Honey or Honeybun. You'll never get him to admit that but he FUCKING DOES.

Q = Quaint: what is their favourite non-modern thing?

You leave him notes in his leather jacket and he melts every time he reaches in for his cigarettes and pulls out the little piece of paper with your hand writing.

R = Rainy Day: what do they like to do on a rainy day?

He writes and insists that you suffer the creative process with him.

S = Sad: how do they cheer themselves/each other up.

The most fucking stupid faces. He takes polaroids and tapes them everywhere. He put a ludicrous one in your underwear drawer one day and you laughed so hard you fell down the stairs.

T = Talking: what do they love to talk about?

Anything and everything. Recently, he's been obsessed with Ann Rice novels. Of course, his ass would be be. Fucking Lestat. You're so damn sick of hearing about that damn vampire, lol.

U = Unencumbered: What helps them relax?

He actually likes fishing. He also doesn't mind the view if you go with him and lay over there half naked on a towel. Just saying.

V = Vaunt: what do they like to show off? What are they proud of?

Pft. How quickly he can steal your attention away from anything and everything.

W = Wedding: when, how, where do they propose?

He thinks about it but he's too scared to ask. He will eventually. He'll basically be hyperventilating but you don't rush it. You know he's gonna ask and you know he's gotta do it. So you patiently wait and the second he gets it out you answer with an immediate, 'YES!' Then you tackle him.

X = Xylophone: What’s their song?

"I'd Love You To Want Me" by Lobo. Because of fucking course.

Y = You’re the ___ to my ___ (e.g the cookies to my milk, the macaroni to my cheese)

"Pills to my booze." "Nikki, shut the fuck up!" "Baby, come on!" "I will cut you!" And that mother fucker just fucking laughs.

Z = ZZZZ: How do they sleep?

Not often. But with you? He's fucking OUT.

WHO ELSE DO YA’LL WANT TO SEE FLUFFY ABC HEADCANONS FOR?

Hello darlings! Hope you enjoyed this little piece and have a wonderfully awesome day!

If you wanna see more of my content just check out my blogs! @littlemessyjessi is the main blog full of fandom fictions, imagines, headcanons and sickeningly sweet fluff! Yeah, I know, lol. Barf. But hey, I like it. @witchyweirdness is the magical blog full of witchy content And last but not least ! @monsterbaesbymamakennysaurus is my monster blog full of all kinds of monster related content! So I hope to see you there! Love, Kenny

@frankie2902

@pleasantdreamqueen @becrazy–beyou –beyou

@becrazy-beweird

@littledeadrottinghood @blackirisposts

@therealmrshale @woodworthti666

@jimmys-afterlife-love-deactivat @thegreatirene@fanfictionandjunk

@angelus320

@alanlizzingtonshore@buriednurbckyrd@disneymarina@@tubbypeachwriting

@sullybot @georgiagrl1990 @whenallsaidanddone

@mischiefnevermanaged94 @inumorph

@congurl

@centerhabit

@bubblymusiclover13

@meetcally

@qtmeryr

@thisismysecrethappyplace

@tnupsweetpie

@alisoncdariel

@hannahloveslife

@wormyboi

@blackirisposts

@maggyme13

@amethyst09

@lostdarksoul6

@fanfics1717

@coffeebooksandfandom

@gruffle1

@neeadinghugs

Love, Kenny

#nikki sixx #douglas booth nikki sixx #nikki sixx requests #nikki sixx x reader #nikki sixx x ps reader #nikki sixx x plus size reader #reader #reader insert #x reader #ps reader #plus size reader #the dirt #motley crue #the dirt imagine #fluffy abc headcanons

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drlauralwalsh · 4 years

Text

The Lusty World of Lesbian Widows

I’m really frustrated that COVID has gotten in the way of my grief achievements. I figured 3 months in, I’d be doing the television talk show circuit, sold my book, and set up a non-profit foundation. If only this pandemic hadn’t gotten in my way.

In my life before, if I spent too much time alone (like, over 4 hours), I’d start texting my sister-in-law that I was unsupervised and feral. Uh oh. I’d start going down rabbit holes and come up with weird stuff like how buff male kangaroos get. Or questioning if my parents were really married since I couldn’t find a record of their union in the limited online databases. I could have paid for real records but I’m cheap. I know, sounds crazy.

But now, I’m alone for long stretches of time. I’ve managed to channel some of this agitated energy into writing essays that speak to weirdos like me (shout out to my fellow weirdos!). I spend hours researching (me-searching as we said in grad school) and discovering overachieving methods to dam the waters of my new spouse-less life.

I’m not just your average widow. Oh no no no. Of course, I have to be special so allow me to tack on some extra layers - lesbian, stepmom, and young (-ish, right?). At 45, I have finally found a way to inch back towards the youth and relevance lost as you enter the fourth decade of life. Today, I’d like to let you into the wonders of lesbianism.

I’m going to assume you’re not submerged in this subculture so I’ll tell you some secrets. People are fascinated by lesbians. To be fair, we live pretty mysterious lives. We leave you hanging on profound questions like who takes out the trash and how do they have sex without a woody woodpecker? Sometimes, other communities get lumped in with us but they are actually quite different. Of these witches, spinsters, and women who wear comfortable shoes, I only belong to only one of those so far. I’m working on my stovetop skills and hope to someday conjure a penis. Not a real one; that would be weird.

Amazon’s book market best represents the variable interests of our fan club members. Right after my wife died, I launched a search for books on “lesbian widows.” You’d think the algorithms would have pegged me by now (ha ha). I was dismayed yet amused by the grand interpretation of what Amazon thought I meant. The following is an unedited list of the top books recommended for me to purchase under these auspicious terms:

Lesbian Widows: Invisible Grief

by Victoria Whipple (Kindle $25.98, Paperback $46.95, Hardcover $907.71)

I’m impressed that the first one actually included my search terms but dang, it’s expensive to be a lesbian widow. To be fair, you can rent it for $9.21 a month. It’s also terribly niche within an already small niche - invisible lesbian widows? Published in 2014, you’d think it would be a little more hip. Maybe it’s because I live in Chicago but even as an introvert, I’m decently visible. Still, glad it exists and appeals to all eight people who each gave it a 5-star rating.

The Care and Feeding of Waspish Widows: Feminine Pursuits

by Olivia Waite (Kindle $3.99, Paperback $6.99)

I must quote the basic plot description for you to get the full impact of this novel: “The last thing the widow wants is to be the victim of a thousand bees. But when a beautiful beekeeper arrives to take care of the pests, Agatha may be in danger of being stung by something far more dangerous…” The cover depicts said wapish widow sit/leaning against her handsome, pants suit-clad beekeeper. At the much less expensive price for kindle and paperback, I’m only slightly put off by labeling bees as pests.

Odd women?: Spinsters, lesbians and widows in British women's fiction, 1850s–1930s

by Emma Liggins (Kindle $73.24, Hardcover $95.00)

The period is a little off but at least it includes diverse, international women. I was looking for a self help book but this seems slightly more academic. Not sure why there’s a question mark in the title as there’s no question about our oddity. The description reads, “Women outside heterosexual marriage in this period were seen as abnormal, superfluous, incomplete and threatening, yet were also hailed as ‘women of the future’.” Aw shucks, I *am* ahead of my time. Dang that price tag! No renting option for this one.

The Grass Widow

by Nanci Little (Kindle $0.00, Paperback $14.95)

It’s unclear where we’ll find the lesbian widow in this 2010 novel but the description yields some mild foreshadowing: “As a familiar civilization fades into the distance, she is nineteen, unmarried and pregnant, and has no reason to think that the year 1876 won't be her last...Joss, in her brother's clothes and severely lacking in social graces, has no time to mollycoddle a pampered, pregnant New England lady. It's work or starve, literally. There are no servants, no laborers - just a failing farm, impending winter and the two of them to face it together.” It sounds like the shameless Joss needs her own dose of mollycoddling (wink, wink) to get through the chilly nights.

Her Widow

by Joan Alden (Paperback $18.00)

More popular with 10 people giving it an almost stellar rating, this tomb’s immodest summary insists it belongs on every bookshelf. YOU WILL PAY ATTENTION TO US! That’s how I read it. Seriously, of all the books this one comes the closest to what I actually wanted. Waiting for the kindle unlimited edition….(having no man money makes us frugal).

Made For You 3

by K. Shantel (Kindle $4.99)

Apparently, Made For You 1 and 2 were not as popular. Despite the fair price, this tale omits widows opting for the groundbreaking combination of lesbian romance and football. While tragedy surely threads through this plot, it falls short of crossing the threshold from football to death (it probably does). Shocker, I defy the sporty lesbian trope and instead prefer to spend time among my vast, treasured collection of power tools. Just to be clear, I mean the ones for home repair (get your mind out of the gutter!) If the lady protagonists of this book had been thrown together building a Habitat for Humanity house with their 10 dogs using only their Subaru to transport lumber, I might be more captivated.

The Lady's Guide to Celestial Mechanics, Book 1 of 1: Feminine Pursuits Series

by Olivia Waite (Kindle $3.99, Paperback $6.99)

I’ll give the author the benefit of believing there are more to come in the series. The title of this one intrigues me (I may steal it later) but sadly, it also defaults to worn stereotypes. This collection of lesbian tropes finds my kin scoring yet another toaster for the conversion of a hapless straight lady. Lesbians for the win! Lady Reads-A-Lot gave it 5 stars and commented, “This was poetic and lovely, full of beautiful descriptions that knew exactly how to leave you breathless and then stop just before tipping into tedious.” I’m guessing she means the sex scenes? If you’ve ever watched any real lesbian porn, you know that it’s far better for the participants than the viewers.

Erotica: The Forbidden Adventures Of A Grieving Widow (Seduction, Lust, Lesbian Sex, Interracial Sex, Bondage and More)

by Amy King (Kindle $0.00)

This one is hands down, my favorite title and you can’t beat the price. The author keeps the marketing short to sell you her novel: “All Ava wanted was to erase the memory of her recently departed husband. Little did she know that in trying to do so, she would experience mind-blowing adventures and lust across the globe. Ava would never be the same again as she ravenously eats up whatever adventure blows her way.” Even though it’s another toaster novel, as a grieving widow ‘ravenously eats up’ does resonate. I don’t think she means jars of cookie butter.

Of the eight masterpieces on the list, five are romance novels, one is academic, and two are in the ballpark (excuse the sports metaphor). Scrolling further only yields more erotica including another novel titled, “Football Widows (lesbian)” by Amanda Mann and Deadlier Than the Male Publications. Now I get it that we make up a small percentage of the population but this is some seriously messed up shit.

Removing the lesbian and searching only for ‘widow’ yields twenty pages of books. I know what you’re thinking - “C’mon Laura, what’s the big deal? Just get the standard widow book.” And believe me, I’ve amassed quite the collection and am waiting for just the right intersection of not too devastated but ready to sob. Bear with me for a sec - think about how we just want to be seen when we’re at our lowest. When I first typed those words into the search bar, I just wanted something that used wife instead of husband.

Every grief has specific salient elements and it’s too super niche to touch on all at the same time. It would be weird and/or maybe nice to find another lesbian widow stepmom psychologist who lost her cop wife of almost 5 years to a PTSD-induced psychotic break and suicide. That’s a Subaru full of identities. If this person did exist, I’d be suspicious we’re the target on Incel trolls, longing to read the words of more seductive, witchy lesbians. Instead, I plan on taking the high road. I’ll get my knowledge and support from those who accept me by the category. Obviously, one out of one lezzies agree there’s a market for lesbian widow self help guides - at the right price. I may still write that book but if I want to get rich, I’ll definitely have to add more sex scenes.

#lesbian #widow #amazon #books #humor

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everyhowlmarksthedead · 4 years

Text

EARLY BIRD

Angel Reyes x Reader

Anon asked: could you write an imagine with angel Reyes in which you think he’s gonna break up with you because he’s been distant with you.

Word Count: 1.9k

Thanks to my lovely beta reader @starrynite7114 ✨

Author comments: I'm sorry it took me so long! I just needed some time away from my phone, 'cause I was feeling somewhat sick, but I'm back! I hope you all enjoy. Gif isn't mine, credits to the author.

Tag list: @starrynite7114 @chibsytelford @dazzledamazon @mara-mpou @sammskellington @gemini0410 @1-800-imagines @briana-mishell24 @sassymox @whyisgmora @aquamento @sadeyesgf @viviansafizada @samcrobae @jade770 @witchy-wish @rebel-without-cause-x ✨ (if you wanna be tagged, send me a message!)

Another morning, waking up in an empty bed and the next side to yours totally cold. You snort turning your body above it, pulling your hair away from your forehead with a hand. There's any noise outside of the bedroom, the one you were supposed to share with Angel because, probably, he left the house stealthily some hours ago. You don't know what's going on. You don't know what's happening between you. And at any time you have tried to talk with him about it, he only says that everything is okay and you're just a little paranoid. You want to believe him. You really try with all your efforts, but there's a bunch of insecurities getting stuck inside your chest oppressing it, that doesn't let air through.

✉: “hey, early bird”

You haven't thought about it, grabbing your phone to know if he is still alive, leaving it on the pillow where your head is resting. Some minutes laters, when you're almost falling asleep again, the advice dings turning on the screen.

✉: “eh”

That's all. And he keeps saying that nothing has changed. For sure.

✉: “you free 2nig?”

✉: “i think so”

“y?”

✉: “we could have a night in”

“dinner and movie”

“hang out for beers”

✉: “am into first”

✉: “k! 7? 8?”

✉: “8 good”

✉: “k! ily”.

✉: “back”

You know he's not going to come, but at least you try it.

When the night is about to fall down plunging Santo Padre into the darkness of the desert, you begin to set up ready in case a miracle happens. Putting the steaks you bought at pops, in the pan with some oil and salt over low heat, you leave the kitchen to change your clothes. Wearing nothing but his favorite shirt, you spread on your neck and collarbone that fruity and fresh perfume he loves the most. And picking up your hair in a ponytail, you walk barefoot back to the kitchen. It's flooded by the delicious smell of the meat cooking slowly, turning them to the other side when it's getting golden. Leaving the food in the background, you go next to the freezer checking that the cold beers are ready to be drinked. You have popcorn, candies and chocolate for later. Everything is on point, even if you don't have much faith that he's going to come.

You weren't wrong.

At half past nine you're sitting on the couch, eating the cold steak you cooked and drinking the third beer. Angel didn't answer any of your messages, nor your calls. So, after trying to contact him for almost one hour, you decided to have dinner alone.

Another night.

The desire to cry floods you with leaps and bounds, grabbing the last piece from the fork in a bad mood before leaving the dish on the table and drinking your beer till it's empty. You fall asleep on the sofa some minutes after with your eyes filled with tears.

Although the door closes silently, you open your eyes getting up, stretching once you sit up. Angel looks like shit, tired and upset with his hair made a mess. Noticing sideways that the sun is almost shining, you don't say anything when he's about to apologize. Leaving him alone with the word in his mouth. You don't even pick up dinner stuff, going back to bed and throwing away the shirt you're on to wear yours. Covering your head with the blankets, you can hear Angel's heavy steps following to the bathroom to get locked in. The water running down the shower.

A fist hitting the marble.

And finally, a weary snort when the mattress sinks a little next to you.

“I was arrested.”

No words from you. He knows you're awake. Once your eyes are opened, it's impossible for you to fall asleep again.

“I really wanted to spend last night with you, mi amor.”

Nothing.

You don't even move.

“I'm so sorry.”

You try to get up, pulling away the blankets tired of hearing bullshit. Not understanding why he just doesn't tell you it's all over, assuming he doesn't because he hates loneliness and no matter how much he despises you, that you're going to come back once and again like a beaten dog faithful to its master. He never was like that, he just changed from nothing. From being the loveliest man to a ghost in your life. Angel grabs your wrist, stopping you from leaving him alone, but you can't look at his face.

You can't fall again.

“Stay, please.”

“I needed you to stay a lot of times, and you weren't even here.”

“I'm sorry.”

“Yeah, you already said that.”

With a heavy snort being spitted by your lips, you sit on the edge of the bed rubbing your face with both hands. Getting up and holding your phone in a hand, you guide your feet to the door looking for some coffee in the kitchen, to serve it inside a big mug.

“Emily is back and I am just trying to save EZ's ass. I didn't see I was abandoning you.”

Sounds like an explanation, but you don't really care. This hole between you two isn't going to get closed with some apologies and some kisses. He's going to have to make it up to you.

Hard.

“And when I’m saying I’m sorry, it's because I'm really sorry (Y/N).” He takes three steps closer towards you, with his hands keeping down inside the pockets of his short sweatpants. “I fucking love you. Nothing and nobody could change that. I swear on my mom.”

You have a sip of your coffee, closing your eyes when he names his mother for the first time in that way.

“Listen, I got to be back at the scrapyard in four hours. But this afternoon we're gonna go to a place.”

“Which place?”

“You'll see. And I know you're gonna like it.”

“But?”

There's always a ‘but’.

“But first I have to pick up a buddy, I promise him that he could stay with us”.

“What the fuck, Angel?!”

You're drowning in coughs, leaving the cup to hit your chest with a palm.

“(Y/N), trust me, okay? You will love him.”

“You're a fucking jerk.”

“Mi amor, listen.” He grabs your forearm, stopping you. “Trust me”.

“I can't fucking trust you. Not today. Not after telling me you were fucking arrested, and now telling me you're gonna bring a ‘buddy’ to our fucking house without asking me.”

“You're gonna regret those words this afternoon.”

“Yeah, but for that, you have to be here and you're not gonna come.”

Letting go yourself, you walk away from him. You can't believe this is truly happening, getting worse as the minutes go by.

Driving through the desert, you don't know where the hell you're going, hoping he's not bringing you to Vicki's place because one of the girls needs to hide. Even if he talked to you about a guy. Angel is giving you the directions you have to take, making your blood boil whenever you ask him about it and he just smirks at you with that kind of smile you would like to punch out.

And yes, it's a surprise when you reach Grace's kennel. Frowning at him as you stop your car, you try to keep calm.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Am I a fucking joke to you, Angel?”

“What?”

“I'm not gonna fucking bring a junkie to my house!”

“We're n— We're not he—”. He can't even talk, breaking into laughs stirring on his seat. “Step out of the car, mi amor.”

“No! You know what? We're fucking done! I can't! I can't handle it!”

You're getting so nervous you don't know what you are saying. Collapsing. Exploding. But seems like the oldest Reyes doesn't give a fuck if you are on the verge of an anxiety attack, when he takes off your seat belt before grabbing the keys of your car. Angel doesn't say anything, getting out of it and walking to your side. After opening your door, he holds your hand pushing you into him. And you just let him do what he wants with you.

“You ok?” Grace asks you somewhat confused and worried, looking at your pale face. Pursing your lips, you shrug your shoulders.

Seems like you're in shock, not understanding anything that is going on around you while your boyfriend guides your steps to the backyard of the kennel. You find a big black dog lying on the ground with a plastic cone covering his head from his neck and some bandages on his paws and his tail. Tail that he begins to move full of happiness walking with some difficulties close to Angel.

“See, buddy?! I told ya I was coming back for ya'!” Your boyfriend squats towards the dog to hug him, whilst the animal is crying a little, stirring and trying to lick his face.

“What? What's that?” You point at the dog with a finger.

“I was driving on my way back home, and I saw a fuckig shithead dragging him by the paws with a bike. I was arrested because he ended up unconscious”.

Pursing your lips, you can't help but cry slightly bending over the floor and stretching a hand on air, just wanting that he can smell you to see you don't want to hurt him. The dog brings his snout closer, sniffing your fingers for some seconds taking two steps next to you. His tail starts to move again, imagine that he's also smelling Angel's scent on your clothes.

“Hey, buddy. Nice to meet you”. Using a soft and low tone, the dog shortens the distance licking your face without expecting. That makes you laugh loudly.

“I know you feel alone when I’m riding and he doesn't have a home.” Angel says, waiting for you to finish spinning the matter by yourself. “See? I knew you were gonna regret your words.”

“Ugh, shut up.” You growl, drawing a smile to your new friend with his head rested on your chest, as you caress one of his sides.

“Is he okay?” Your boyfriend asks Grace, getting up as he does, being followed by the dog.

The women nods.

“He's strong. But I'll give you some pills for pain, in case he complains. And you should change the bandages every day. Bring him back next week and I'll check him.”

“Done. How much do I own you, sweetheart?”

“Nothing. Just take him to his new home.”

“Thank you, Grace.” You say before hugging her tightly.

“Call me if you need anything, okay?” She said then, nodding at her.

“So, what's his name?” You ask Angel, walking back to the car with the dog practically glued to your legs.

“Caco”. He answers holding your hand, leaving a kiss on the back of it.

“So, I'm assuming the place where we’re going next is a pet shop, to buy him a lot of things.”

“Shit, mi amor, I got fucking horny every time you show me how smart you are.”

#mayans mc x reader #mayans mc #mayans mc imagine #mayans x reader #angel reyes x reader #angel reyes fanfiction #angel reyes

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the-kipsabian · 5 years

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i am, up, for hearing you ramble about some of your ocs??? Maybe just some general things you have planned for some!! i am up for t h i s

ooooooof alRIGHTY YOU ASKED FOR IT

im gonna. go with a group of ocs tied into a story together cause its easier than picking some random ones and also cause i. love this group a whole lot tbh aaaaaAAAAAA

k so theres this group of kids called ‘supernatural nerds’, in a story together titled ‘hunters of fate’, which is basically just a modern supernatural setting with various beings alongside normal humans, like you have demons and witches and people with extraordinary powers and shapeshifters and a vampire. at least in this group so far, theres a whole lot of other beings appearing throughout the story but not really as a regular cast

as for main characters we have ada! shes a witch who owns a little witchy shop in the city, and has her workshop, where she brews her potions and performs other witch things she does, near the outskirts of the city. she also works with a local private detective (and her love interest cause ofc) to help him solve cases related to more supernatural happenings around the city and other places nearby

april is a vampire~ im not 100% sure yet how im gonna exactly fit her into the things, but shes definitely gonna be the spice of the city nightlife, so shes gonna bring up some trouble to the people already having to deal with the rest of the supernatural stuff running about tbh

aurora is a shapeshifter! she can turn into a chipmunk and back to a human at will, and she loves being mischievous and pulling pranks on people a lot tbh. especially since she can get away with it really easily by turning into a chipmunk and just disappearing, and as shes homeless, people dont really know how to locate her very easily

blair is a little of an odd one as im not entirely sure how im going to place him yet either, but he has a superpower of electronic disruption, which allows him to make stuff like machinery and lights go haywire and misfunction at will. which he uses a lot just to cause mayhem and general chaos in public, mostly cause he has a need for attention

blaire is also a witch, def friends with ada, i’d say they work quite a lot together and possibly co-own the witch shop in town too? im not entirely sure as im. also actively trying to sell this girl right now so im trying to not tie her down too much, but if i end up keeping her, that would probably be the plan!

brendan is the previously mentioned local private detective who ada works with, he mostly deals with the realms of the paranormal, in cases that other detectives wont take cause of their nature of being related to something more supernatural that seems to plague the city and its surroundings

brooke is blair’s sister, and a class a hacker. she can basically get into any system, personal or higher grade, if you just give her enough time. mostly she just uses her skill and the things she learns from hacking into people’s stuff, to track down her brother who she lost contact with, but if theres ever a chance to grab a little extra cash on the side selling the info she finds forward or anything like that, shes probably gonna take it. brooke isnt exactly the most morally high character tbh

declan is a soft rich pretty boi, working safely in his father’s company and stuff, tho he does have. a side job as an underground fighter lol. cause he wants to make a name of his own and not just lean on his father’s and whatnot, so he wants to make his own way of things

evan is a young boy, an “adopted” son of hunter. he just pretty much hates everything and everyone and loves to rebel cause “youre not my real dad” and well. hes not wrong (this is a whole big complicated spoiler-y story thing im not gonna get into right here and now but yeah. evan has issues with everything cause people are assholes mmmm)

faine! is a childhood friend of nates! shes an important character tbh, and shes a soft sweetie who will fist fight anyone who talks shit about her friends. shes a babe that loves pink, but also shes. kind of a sad character cause shes way too dedicated to nate and his stuff for her own good, and her backstory includes dead parents so heyyyy

hunter is a demon. and spoilers, responsible for the death of nate’s parents (which was technically ruled just as a car accident but welllllll). really his whole business is to just do demon stuff and make deals with people so he can either get them to do his bidding for him, or so that he can possess them or their souls to get shit he wants done done without having to involve himself in stuff. also yes hes technically evan’s “adoptive dad” cause evan’s parents sold him to hunter for riches

iris! my sweet little witch bean aaaa

kevinnnnnnn, nate’s boyfriend. somewhere down the line in canon, i havent exactly figured out where or when its gonna happen but its somewhere down there lol. i dont. have too much for him yet honestly? highly debating on giving him some sort of a more high profile career like maybe hes. a model or a small time actor or something. something more high key. idk but hes just. yeah he gay thats about it so far lol

narrator is a demon with the ability to see in the future of others. they do a little bit of fortune telling, tho its never straightforward told to people what they see, even if they do see some things in the future happening very clearly. they can only give out cryptic hints, stuff like ‘beware of the red eyes’ or something like that, giving out anything else will have dangerous consequences to the people who’s future he is telling tbh

nate my boi

nicolas is the second shapeshifter of the group! and is friends with aurora cause of that obviously yay ~ another homeless little dumpster diver, pretty much just like aurora, cause they constantly hang together and just enjoy making a mess together. i dont. have too much on him yet or where he fits into the story, but i love him nonetheless aaaaaa hes precious ~

aaaand finally! zakath! the third demon boi of the group! hes tied together with hunter (cough friends with benefits cough), as they work together closely - zakath is referred to as a ‘collector demon’, who takes the tasks of collecting what humans have promised to demons when making deal with them. thats for example how evan was brought into this whole mess, as zakath picked him up from his parents and brought him over to hunter who the humans had made a deal with to give him their first born child for monetary riches. he might have. some ulterior motives with things and hanging out with hunter tho, buuuuut story spoilers yay, so we dont talk about that now

that should be. everyone? this got long hhhhh i just. love my babies so much goshh i really need to write more for this story again at some point soon mmmmm

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ncttivagcx-blog · 6 years

Text

it’s a bird !! it’s a plane !! no, wait, it’s lucy’s trash children !!

DAO ‘LAHNNIE’ LAHN aka R E M.

introducing useless superhero #1, miss dao lahnnie !!

nicknamed ‘sleeping beauty’ cause well,,,,,,,,she Nap

her power is that when she sleeps, she can pull things from her dreams into the real world. seems easy enough, but sometimes things get a bit skewed if she doesn’t imagine every detail.

example: she could pull a car out, but if in her dream she didn’t think of the engine, then the car wouldn’t have an engine. it might still run though if she dreamt that she was driving it.

her superhero name is ‘rem’ because she at least has to reach the rem stage of sleep to start dreaming.

for the most part, she does more support than actual superhero field work. she dreams up gadgets and things to help out on missions. if she is on the field, she’ll sometimes pop out to go hide and get some shut eye and then just pops back up randomly, except now she has a giant hammer or something.

she has a pet crow. his name king richard the third, but everyone calls him dick. she does not mind this because she did name him when she was five, but it ruffles king richard’s feathers sometimes. he was the first ‘living’ item she ever pulled out of a dream and probably her favorite item she’s ever pulled out.

she,,,,,,really wants to be a hero but most likely knows that she’s only ever gonna be a sidekick or on a support team at best.

but she really is a soft and excited also sleepy baby and she just wants to help out in whatever way she can :))

KANG JINSUNG aka B A S I L I S K.

then there’s this medusa ass motherfucker.

what a tool

they straight up got like basilisk eyes so if you look at them directly in the eye, you become petrified !!

does wear off eventually,,,,,,,but also like its probs just terrifying and ptsd inducing as a whole,,,,,” i thought they were pretty and i met their eye and suddenly i couldnt move and i was down in a ditch ”

- actual quote from a previous victim

they probs murders people after they petrify em cause uhhhhh they a villain and uhhhhhh they’re nefarious and all that

idek what supervillain stuff they do besides like sitting in their super secret villain lair and plotting plots and stuff. give him a nemesis or something pls

wears a blindfold for the most part because glasses don’t block their power enough and they’re tired of having to replace petrified henchmen

other senses are heightened because they don’t use their eyes when dealing with other people unless they’re dealing with other people

they just a mystery villain that lives in a cavelike headquarters and probs just likes to fuck with people cause they’re an asshole

LYDIA CARTER aka S I L K.

they want to be,,,,,the very best,,,,,,like no one ever was !!

their power is fabric manipulation with a particular preference for silk !! hence the name lmao

anywho, they’re a talented aerial silk dancer and uses whatever fabric available to tie around posts and stuff highkey like spiderman and like,,,,,the real silk but also is also skilled in aerial combat.

they’re like a circus performer if the circus performer kicked ass.

they’re learning to be a hero but really,,,,,,they don’t particularly care about heroics,,,,,they just wanna be famous.

they wanna be the absolute best of the best and hey, if heroics don’t get them there, then maybe villainy will.

they cocky as shit tbh

like, is highkey getting scouted by hero agencies to become a sidekick but they just Scoff - as if they’re working for anyone other than themselves

will probably graduate at some point and just try to fight all superheroes to establish themself as The Best

Chaotic Neutral

BAE JOOHYUK aka R E F L E K T A.

i didnt have anything planned for him

i just wanted his quirk and i liked his face

so he can teleport through reflective surfaces even if it’s not a mirror !! so, that’s like windows, phone screens, uhhhh particularly shiny tabletops??

like imagine someone just cleaning a glass coffee table and hyuk just bLOOPS through

he always has a mirror on him. this leads to so many vanity jokes but he mostly just tosses mirrors everywhere and whooshes around and people are like dEAR GOD JUST STAY STILL JFC

loves just popping up through people’s phonescreens, but the surface usually isnt big enough so he’ll shove like a hand through or something

honestly just an asshole that is lowkey lovable but mostly annoying

just trying to past his regular passes cause he’s okay at best in hero training but english?? nah mate

Chaotic Good

RIDLEY VIDRARU aka V E R S E.

do i know anything about him ?? absolutely noT

i know that he’s got 24 gif icons and that i’m gonna stretch them as much as i can

also probs gonna give up at some point and use big gifs i just want hiS TWIN FACE

okAY DECIDED

his hero name is verse - short for versatile. his quirk is that he can mimic any surface/function of an item as long as he presses five fingers to it

think kevin levin from ben 10 but if kevin levin could also like touch a chainsaw and have a chainsaw for a hand

due to his Traumatic Past ( see: luca and or winnie ) he has ptsd induced selective mutism

he Quiet

not super dedicated to being a hero, but his sister is super into so he’s super into it as a show of solidarity

will square up to anyone who messes with his sister, even tho people probs gives him shit for not talking

“ how are you supposed to save anyone if you can’t even open your mouth ?? ”

if he really gotta get his point across then he Bumblebee’s it and just copies a radio,,,,,,fiddles with the stations until the lyrics from songs and snippets of radio shows forms the message he wants to give

he a versatile boy,,,,,,he Surviving,,,,

ASPEN KUMAR aka L A D Y C Y A N I D E

WITCHY WOMAN

this one is a baddie i love her so much

literally just wants to set up a matriarchal society with her as the head in government

be that as president or queen, depends on how her takeover pans out.

currently, she set to inherit the hotels her father owns. she’s an absolute shARk when it comes to staking out claims on more lands and she really just gonna buy her way to the top. she’s got several blocks under her control already.

does evil villain stuff on the down low, probs got a bunch of henchmen. got a mask too cause masks are cute. she just goes around and kills people who refuse to sign over any properties to her.

she wanna own the whole goddamn street, then the town, then the world probs laskdfjadfl

okay so her power is poison generation. she can emit toxic gas from her mouth, but her blood itself is poisonous. so if she being flashy, she just blows out some toxic gas into her victims. if she being sneaky, then just a prick on her finger and bada bing bada boom she’s dripping her own blood into someone’s wine glass.

not super flashy as a villain cause she can’t get caught so she sends henchmen a lot and joins fights with heroes when she’s bored. usually skedaddles before the police show up and lets her men take the fall for it.

literally will just show up and start poisoning people

she’s fun at parties

at least one murder mystery at every party she’s at. her henchmen jokingly called her Clue

“ in the foyer/kitchen/study, the killer is always the lady, and the weapon is always poison. ”

#okay no gif for ridley cause he *psy voice* wants a NEW FACE NEW FACE #also ugh #tags #dont wanna

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