#just needed to get this out of my head

[boredth]

In good hands

Inspired by @johnwickb1tsch's collab fic

#ahem anyway 😃 #just needed to get this out of my head #that damn grin especially #john wick #john wick au #tex johnson #blood tw #comic #my art

[thefandomtraveler]

this is probably not a really popular opinion, but I kind of hope they will scratch the kuwei kiss out in the spin-off? I know people would love the potential angst that would come with it but in the show it will hurt so much more and now that wesper is established (and literally lives together) I just don't think it should happen it feels so wrong

#i don't know if this makes any sense #just needed to get this out of my head #jesper fahey #wylan van eck #kuwei yul bo #six of crows #crooked kingdom #shadow and bone #shadow and bone season 2 #wesper

[aasgardsreia]

So... Eursulon is Garrett from quest for camelot right?

#wbn #will back this up with more info #just needed to get this out of my head #it clicked when they talked about a potential familiar #eursulon #worlds beyond number #the wizard the witch and the wild one #wwwo #twtwatwo

[singmeyoursimpsong]

uh ok steddie headcanon time ! Today's special guest: and they were roommatessss

Modern au EMT Steve and Horror Novelist Eddie as roommates! (I'm thinking Chicago, aged up into their late-20s, early 30s).

Eddie trying to figure out the logistics of a particular gory scene, and having an "aha" moment - why not ask Steve?

Eddie: *tentatively, since they don't really have a relationship past cordial-roommate* "Hey, uh, Steve?" 

Steve: *watching tv on the couch, shoving his face full of popcorn after a long shift* "...yeah?"

Eddie: *sits down on couch, arms crossed* "So I know you've had a long day..." 

Steve: *now not watching tv, popcorn pushed to the side, a bit confused* "Shit - did I forget to start the dishwasher again? Sorry about that, it's been a hell of a day -" *starts to get up*

Eddie: *head shaking* "No no! You did remember, no, uh, I was actually going to ask a question related to your job...?" *voice goes up at the end, seeing Steve's reaction before continuing*

Steve: *the tension in his shoulder dissipates as he plops himself back onto the couch* "Oh yeah. Go for it. Shoot." *resumes popcorn-eating*

Eddie: *lets out a sigh he didn't know he was holding in* Awesome! *all of a sudden slides a pair of readers onto his face, pulls out a thick notebook with hand-written notes and hand-drawn diagrams from seemingly nowhere* "Yeah, so I have a question about beheadings, like, I theoretically understand just how much pressure and just how sharp a blade would need to be for a clean cut, but what about with a dull weapon, and would the person doing the beheading need to get a running start?" 

Steve: *pauses, waiting for the punchline... then realizes that Eddie is dead (haha) serious* "Alright how tall are we talking? And what kind of blade are we using?" *full mouth of popcorn* "-cause I've seen some fucked up shit with those Japanese katanas - never, ever get on the wrong side of a guy who has ornamental swords on their walls - and don't get me started on focal and guillotine lacerations from machetes - *another mouth of popcorn, head shaking, eyes wide* " -those blades are crazy"

Eddie furiously takes notes and asks several (very good) questions that surprise Steve. Cue this becoming a somewhat regular occurrence, where Eddie asks Steve whether particular killing scenes seem realistic. Steve is impressed with Eddie's thoroughness ("It's gotta be good, Stevie. It's paying our bills..."), and Eddie is amazed at Steve's limitless knowledge of bodily injuries ("Class of 2008. Senior year shaped me into the man I am today, Eddie"). 

Their easy, newfound relationship turns toward something more the day that Steve doesn't understand the particulars of what Eddie is asking him, and instead asks to show him. Steve has his own aha moment while on his back and a butterknife to his neck, arms pinned to the floor above him, with Eddie smiling manically above him. They both have their own aha moments then, Eddie and Steve. 

#steddie #steve harrington #steve x eddie #steve and eddie #bisexual steve harrington #stranger things headcanons #stranger things au #well I spent two hours on this instead of my coding homework #you're welcome #just needed to get this out of my head #enjoy! #ps if you know anything about spatial autocorrelation then pls help me w my hw #i beg of you #a little gory #blades #Eddie is a writer #steve is an emt #eddie and steve as roommates #and they were roommates

[ace-cf-cups]

Speaking of vaping, my best friend's husband loves vaping, especially at home. In the evening. He comes home and he starts freaking vaping and it smell horrible and that smell and smoke is all over their small flat... and that's with less than a year old baby and a young breastfeeding mother in that very same flat!

Honestly, whenever he does that, I get this burning desire to strangle him.

How can a smart man be so stupid?!

#vent tw #sorry #just needed to get this out of my head #anti-vaping #anti-vape

[shnipshnap]

Hmmm...

#having thoughts about my gender #i uh #didnt expect this #just needed to get this out of my head #i don't really want to talk to anyone about it until i know for sure #but i don't know how to tell?

[tempests-bards-and-birds]

#the face marinette gives chloé here sends me every time i watch this scene #just #bitch you know nothing about me #just needed to get this out of my head #to free up space #miraculous #mlb #miraculous ladybug #miraculous tales of ladybug and chat noir #marinette dupain cheng #chloé bourgeois #ig #ml gifs #mlb gifs #ml queen banana #queen banana

[divinemissem13]

Fair Haven double drabble (Wasn't it weird how Chakotay didn't seem to care about KJ dating Michael Sullivan? No, it wasn't. Here's why 😊)

Chakotay noticed the changes, even if no one else seemed to. 

The man was suddenly a little bit taller (about Chakotay’s height, actually). 

He began to wear vests (not unlike the ones Chakotay favored).

He was more likely to be found reading than tending bar these days (though Irish literature had never been Chakotay’s favorite).

He was more free with a joke. He asked more questions. He engaged more with the people and the world around him. 

And when Kathryn entered the bar, his face lit up in an all too familiar way.  

Yes, he certainly reminded Chakotay of someone…

So when Kathryn sheepishly admitted that her new boyfriend was a hologram, Chakotay only flashed her a knowing smile (complete with the dimples that he knew made her insides melt). 

“I never let that stand in my way.”

She didn’t need to know that his hologram was always her. 

Because he had noticed the changes in her too. She was lighter, freer in a way she hadn’t been in years.

Not since New Earth. 

So if she was determined to keep him at arm’s length, who better than a poor holographic imitation to remind her how much she missed him?

#double drabble #just needed to get this out of my head #but really - didn't anyone else notice the vests? #star trek voyager #i wrote this #janeway/chakotay #janeway x chakotay #fanfic

[casdeans-pie]

I feel like someone's probably already said this but I really want Cas to be in The Winchesters because he has to time travel back to this time for idk Reasons so Cas accidentally ends up meeting Mary. Something happens and he has to explain that he's an angel though he's very careful not to mention the whole time travelling thing of course,,

and because Mary knows nothing about angels she's still got that idealised version in her head about how they're protectors and Good, and Cas is both of things, so she wouldn't have any reason to dispute that idea. and then if he has to help save her at some point that would only reinforce that opinion

so to her angels are all like Cas

But then whatever he came back to do he manages to do, and now he has to go back to heaven and stop messing with time, but he hesitates, because he Knows Mary and it was so nice meeting her again, and there's things young Mary does that reminds him so much of Dean, so in a small burst of affection and sadness for everything she's going to go through, just before he goes, he tells her that 'angels will be watching over you and your family' - meaning it to be a comfort

so then at the end of the show if she gets her memory of supernatural stuff erased to keep the continuity of the timeline intact that line she says to tiny Dean about being watched over by angels is a residual echo of a memory from Cas

something something endless loops and circles in time

#just needed to get this out of my head #this idea has been bouncing around in there all day #the winchesters #castiel #mary winchester #spn #supernatural #spnwin

[sailorharringrove]

Ok, so - remember this gory wonderland of a photo? Dacre in makeup, for some scene or other in season 4. Notice how his hand is weirdly embedded in his own flesh?

That was not part of his fatal injuries from end of season 3.

I think that is primarily why I have a feeling we might see him again in the Upsidedown in the last two episodes.

People have ended up there in weirder ways. There is one precedent of somebody following a big ol’ defeated Upsidedown monster back to the Upsidedown, and that’s El. She woke up there and climbed back out, more or less unscathed.

What else? Well hello there, twisted corpse. All tangled up in roots and whatnots, and very much dead. But still, somehow represented in the Upsidedown even though the body is probably buried in the other world.

Both of these scenarios are very different to Billy’s death, but they are indicating that the rules in that world are very fluid and responds more to thoughts, emotions and psychic power than the other - standard - world we’re all used to. Which means our common Earth logic may not always apply.

I don’t know where I’m going with this, or if this point has been made more eloquently by somebody else already - I expect it has, these are just my two cents.

Judging by the makeup photo, I think that the most likely scenario is that Billy will feature as a gory illusion yet again to antagonize Max. I only think that it’s the most likely scenario because the Duffers brothers seem to have no interest Billy’s potential or storyline (writing out Neil, etc.) other than a tool for evolving Max’s character.

However! Wouldn’t it be interesting if Billy woke up in the Upsidedown, much like El? Either dragged with intentionally by the fleeing monster, or his body was burned and his soul was somehow trapped in Upsidedown, and a new body was formed for him there somehow.

Wouldn’t it be amazing if Max’s letter, hearing her voice - woke him up?

I don’t know, I just think it would be fucking neat. ❤

#billy hargrove #stranger things season 4 #stranger things s4 #st s4 #stranger things season 4 theories #sorry for the long post #just needed to get this out of my head

[mastur0fnone]

opening up about being sexually assaulted is so hard for me now. it feels like it shouldn't affect me still, like I should be over it. I think that being in a relationship with someone who was hellbent on invalidating my experiences affected me more than I thought, bc I used to know for a fact that I wasn't to blame for what happened, but he made me think otherwise.

it's nice to be reminded that not everyone thinks that way. that I can feel safe sharing this secret with another human on this planet. I hope I can meet others like this throughout life, bc this is so rare.

#personal #just needed to get this out of my head

[snarkspawn]

the devil you know

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 fanart #bg3 raphael #stuff and things #userpharawee #yeah I know everyone and their mum has already done something like this #with the shadow and the exact caption and all lmao I *know* ok #I just. wanted to do it too #and I've had it in my head for months it needed to get out #anyway. moving on!

[kaban-bang]

Farcille

#just something quick between commissions because I needed to get this out of my head #dungeon meshi #farcille #marcille donato #falin touden #cw blood #muh art

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[iamdyeing]

Youth pastor about to tell the story of Abraham voice: "Do you know who else was straight up Jorking it?"

#Just needed to get this out of my head

[cabbybaby]

on guilt, on grief

it's fitting it would rain after such a long heatwave on the anniversary of your death. has it really been nine years? it's almost been a decade, but you are still my beloved friend. i've been thinking about you lately, about death, about guilt and forgiveness, about remembrance.

i'll never forget the day i found out you died. i was about to get my license renewed, sitting on an uncomfortable chair waiting for my name to be called. the phone call didn't feel real. you being gone didn't feel real. like a ghost i answered when called, and i stared at the camera numb and shocked and desolate. for years i carried around a license imprinted with that face i made, forever reminded of how i looked when i learned i lost you. sometimes i'd look at it and laugh at the absurdity of it. sometimes i couldn't bear to pull it out of my wallet. sometimes i handed it to the bartender or a liquor store cashier and felt nothing at all.

i used to feel so guilty. the last time we talked, i was drunk. i was always drunk, and i was in the middle of a two-week-long bender, drifting from party to party along the coast. you called me at two in the morning, and i picked up. i still wonder sometimes. why did you call me? what did we talk about? did you need something, did you just miss me, did i tell you i loved you and couldn't wait to see you again? i'll never know. i was too drunk to remember, and i was too hungover or drunk in the days that followed to text you to ask. i learned you died on the day i had to be sober, but i wasn't sober very much after that.

so every time i drank, every time i got out of rehab and found myself in a bar again, i'd hand over my license and try to drown out the guilt by drinking the source of it. it got worse, i hit rock bottom, i resented the ivs and tubes that kept me alive but couldn't save you, it never made sense. i couldn't imagine feeling right again. i couldn't imagine living at all.

well, it's been years, my friend, and i'm doing better. i'm sober and happy. i've made amends and no longer feel guilty. every sobriety anniversary, your mother tells me how proud you'd be of me, and i believe her. i have a new license. i don't apologize to you when i stare up at the ceiling and think of you. i just miss you. i think of all the good times. i remember the day you helped me buy a bicycle, the music we listened to when we brought it back to our apartment, i remember chasing after you on that bicycle as we went on adventures throughout the city. i remember you playing guitar for me when i was sad. i remember the night i got too drunk and you drove me to the hospital in a snowstorm, and i remember how you so tenderly carried me inside. i remember your laugh. i remember your love. i remember you.

i used to think it was a curse to never "get over" you, to be haunted forever by someone i so terribly lost. but when i remember something funny you once said and throw my head back in laughter, it never feels like punishment. it feels like love.

#just needed to get this out of my head #grief #tw alcoholism #mourning #personal #i have been incorporating a lot of this into my fic writing lately without even realizing it #and it feels good to know how much i have healed #and that my friend lives on in so many ways #miss you love you