#ive been thinking about this a little too much lol

[dontlookatmytmntcollection]

*saunters into your inbox and hands you a small bouquet of pink roses as I tip my hat at you*

Howdidoo friend! Just wanted to drop in and hand you a little token of my thanks and appreciation for the incredible gift of writing that you so willingly share with the rest of us.

In floriography, the Victorian Language of flowers, pink roses represent gratitude and admiration as well well femininity and elegance, which I think you represent wonderfully well. You seem like a very down-to-earth individual with a good heart, so I just wanted to say thanks for being who you are and being brave with sharing your talents. I know it's scary, but you're doing remarkably, honey.

Well done 🙌🏼👏🏼🙌🏼🧡

I say that your requests were open and I'd like to give one a try if and only if you're up for it. (if not then no worries, do whatcha got to do to take care of that beautiful mind ok?)

This is gonna sound really silly, but I have these two off switches that like immediately shut me down. I found this out once ranting about a book to my friends in the library and my one friend just reached up, patted my head and then started playing with my hair. I immediately stuttered to a halt because it was like my brain short-circuited. The other off button for me, is just someone like cradling my head. I have ADHD so I'm constantly go go go. Just adding that little bit of pressure just makes me no joke zoink out, like there are no thunks in that brain whatsoever once you touch my head.

Learning this as Ive gotten older has made it so I'm quite protective of who touches my head because it can make me somewhat kind of vulnerable, so my question of the day is how would the turtles respond to accidentally finding out about somebody's “off” button like that.

You can do whatever you're comfortable with and feels easy to write as I'm not really expecting much. Once again, this is just a request, so please please take care of yourself, your mental health and social batteries please.

Just know I think you're pretty cool and I look forward to seeing what you come up with in the future 😊🧡✨

This'll be easy, because I have the EXACT same thing!

Rubbing my scalp or my face suddenly erases lifelong sleep or hyperactive issues! I melt into touches like that, knocks you out like a light. Sometimes it gets you feeling emotional, too, lol

Thank you for the sweet words, they made my day. Got me feeling seen too. Thanks again for the ask.

I hope you enjoy!

Touch-Sensitive Reader × TMNT

Mikey

-Mikey is less of a touchy guy while getting to know you.

-But he is IN YOUR SPACE.

-All the time.

-He's an EXTREMLY touchy guy.

-But he will wait for you to make the first move.

-Until then, it's all over.

-It will take very, VERY little time for him to find every. Single. Sweetspot.

-He knows where they are on himself, and he knows that everyone alive has a few.

-You had shyly crawled into his lap for the first time, him leanded all the way back on the arm while he pulled you into his chest.

-The movie had barely started by the time he noticed you had gone still. Something he rarely saw with you.

-He looked down, surprised to see your eyes close, your entire body limp in his arms.

-"Y/N?" He whispered, trying not to laugh. "Baby?"

-You didn't budge

-Didn't you tell him you were notoriously horrible at falling asleep?

-He smiled widely, glancing at his hand now hovering over your scalp.

-"Cool."

Donnie

-Nap date.

-He was on his first nap date.

-Sure, it was after a bit of a skwabble over his sleep schedule. Or lack of.

-But he finally gave into curling up in his hammock with you on top of him

-But to be honest, he had been wanting this too. All the naps he's been taking have been spent wishing you were there with him.

-Now you were!

-You had told him you'd stay here until he'd fall asleep.

-You'd asked him if you had his permission to listen to music and play on your phone, all efforts to keep you still.

-He'd agreed, just happy he'd somehow landed someone willing to touch him, let him fall asleep with them.

-His eyes had been dropping, and his fingers had begun to rhythmically comb through your hair.

-Geez, this was paradise. This was everything he ever could have hoped for. The warmth, the weight of your body, the texture of your skin- If life felt this good all the time-

-Your phone dropped from your hand onto his stomach with a soft 'clunk'.

-He hardly noticed until you didn't move to grab it.

-His eyes blinked open, squinting them hard at your head. He wasn't able to see your face, but he could now feel your deep, quiet breathing. How limp you were against him.

-He smiled, his head falling back to the support pillow.

-'Noted.' He thought.

Raph

-Raph could barely remember the times you didn't want to be touched.

-You were all over him right now, and while he didn't have energy to meet this amount of enthusiasm this late- he was defiently feeling as if he had died happy. Unbelieveing that this was his life now.

-Having a partner all over him on the bed. Kissing him everywhere mid conversation, trying to talk to him through your squirming about, trying to get comfortable.

-"C'mere." He whispered, pulling you against his torso, face to face. His right side, your left side on the bed.

-You're chattering went quiet, smiling wide while Raph ducked his face into the right of your jaw, his right hand going up to hold the weight of your head between the bedsheets.

-"Oh, hi." You said.

-"Hi." Raph closed his eyes, starting to brush his thumb gently over your left cheek, his enormous arm going around you tightly, holding you as close as you allowed him.

-He waited for you to continue with your vent- but when you didn't after a long moment- he pulled back to check on your expression.

-Your eyes were closed, lips slightly parted, your head sinking more and more into his hand.

-"Hey," Raph purred. "You like that?"

-You gurgled a noise out, making him smile.

-"Yeah?" He leaned back, lifting his right hand up to smooth over your other cheek, pressing just enough to smear the skin.

-You went completely unresponsive. The change sudden and new.

-Possessivness "You're so cute." He whispered, pressing a kiss to your hairline.

Leo

-Leo had never seen you cry before.

-Something about a confrontation with a scary coworker and HR.

-He felt awkward, too big, too dumb and useless to do anything about you sobbing into his chest.

-While you held tightly to the straps on his chest in substitute of wrapping your own around him- he fought the urge to rip someone's limbs off.

-"I'm right here." He whispered instead. "You're okay, you're okay..."

-His hands combed through your hair, his lips against your scalp, preparing to be there all night.

-It took just a moment, but Leo felt the change as if it happened in him too.

-Your sobs became deep breaths, and your desperate grip on him transformers into your weight laying limp against him.

- "You okay?" Leo asked.

-"Don't stop." You whined.

-It startled a smile out of Leo, and he resumed the petting.

- Because what works, works, right?

#bayverse #raphael #leonardo #tmnt #donatello #tmnt bayverse #bayverse tmnt #my writing #tmnt headcanons #tmnt x reader #bayverse leonardo #leonardo x reader #raphael x reader #michelangelo x reader #donatello x reader

[bigfatbimbo]

Oh fuck you got me obsessed with caine, shoot.

Heya its me again with my second TADC ask lol @hazbinhotelmollykisser

So i literally like just read ur caine post. Uh. I literally have not had enough time to form any thoughts (except for how he would likke with my hands around his waist) UH anyway lol!

I had an idea while writing that paragraph

SO lets say that maybe after you had been doing the censor bar trick on him all day, and eventually you pull him aside and sit on a random chair, and he just without thinking like. Straddles your lap or smth (ewwhat why do i exist i hate my brain ew i hate writing and myself /nsrs) lol and then after a few seconds of silence and like processing he just. I ran out of words shoot.

Basically either horny shenanigans ensue there or you just get up with him and leave him to think about that moment while you go do like god knows what

Everytime i write an ask under this blog i get anxious (partly because i dont think ive ever requested anything other than like smutty hcs or just smut uhhhh) and i secomd guess myself 😭 im not gonna do that this time though!!!1!!,1!!! !!!

Also i have some words about charlie from hazbin hotel and her glittery pink strapon, lute and other exorcist rival(?)words, lucifer words, mr. Puzzles words, and also a few molly words? Going full circle around to my original molly anon ask lol. So basically say the word and i will tell you all of those thoughts and words smiley face emoji

- @hazbinhotelmollykisser

OH MY GOD YES I WIN I DID IT. Also, still working on those Jax headcanons because they were gold, I have a good sum of Jax headcanons to write though.

BUT ANYWAYS! “you pull him aside and sit on a random chair, and he just without thinking like. Straddles your lap or smth” GOD THATS SO CUTE. I like the idea that he just wouldn’t process doing that like it’s just instinct lmfao— BUT I don’t think he wouldn’t do that unless you’d been seeing eachother for a whiiiile. Because he would probably be very careful about keeping things family friendly during the daytime[?] (time your all up??) so I guess that what makes this idea kinda appealing.

ALSO oh my god, don’t second guess yourself when you send something! Your requests are always so cute. Oh also i’ve been meaning to post those little thoughts of saint peter, I probably won’t have too much to say since he’s not one of my favs but I will give my thoughts!

#inbox open #bimbo rambling #caine x reader

[astonmartinii]

F1 ASKS!

i saw this tag floating around and wanted to let yall get to know me better since i’ve been doing this a while and have only really spoken in the form of authors notes! also im not going to tag anyone so just do it if you wanna!

who is your favourite driver?

i think for anyone who has read anything i’ve ever written it’s probably a bit obvious but max verstappen! what can i say little me was told we’re supporting red bull and here was this little charmer (emphasis on little who let that child get into an F1 car)

do you have other favourite drivers?

also based on my writing you can probably tell that my top three are max, charles and oscar! however, i will also say that alex is a close fourth for me (he’s also very nice irl). also as for retired drivers i think the mamma mia series is a bit of a spoiler but i love jenson, seb and kimi

who is your least favourite driver?

i used to say i didn’t dislike anyone on the grid - that was a lie. i’ll still write for anyone within reason but you can also probably tell with how in detail the back and forth is on certain pieces that i am really not a fan of sainz, actually people who get yelled at while i write them would argue it’s more than “not really being a fan of” but i am fake and i have maintained that if i meet him at silverstone (which i very nearly did last year) ill tell him im his biggest fan! also not the biggest fan of like pierre he’s just kinda there for me and a wee bit too cringey ALSO what you may not be able to guess from how i write him… im not really a fan of lando! ive really, really tried especially after his win but he just kinda rubs me the wrong way (i was immediately proven right with the trump comments lol). people say i should pull for him cause he’s from bristol which is where i live but he’s from glastonbury babe - also ive done a few swimming competitions at the school he went to a WOAH baby has so much money.

do you pull for drivers or do you like teams as well?

i mostly pull for drivers but like i guess i like red bull? well i did. i love max so i would follow him everywhere but i did like red bull as well as a team (i like alex, danny and checo so that also helps) but this whole protection of christian horner shtick is really disappointing so id say im a driver person.

if you like teams, who do you pull for?

like i said red bull were the team id pick if i HAD to follow a team - i support chelsea so i cant handle even more disappointment if i followed ferrari and also i only like charles there and they’re the source of all of his misfortune so …

how long have you been into F1?

so my family has always been into F1, my cousin karts and my uncle is a mechanic and makes karts on the side but i had always been more into football cause i could actually go to that with my dad - and also for young me who didn’t know what the fuck a strategy was it seemed kinda boring. but i’d say from maybe 2016ish i started watching it more regularly (hence the max stanship). my mum loves it and her first love in the sport was mark webber which is why we like red bull. but yeah i remember watching max’s first win and was like MUM I WANT THAT ONE (and i have technically met him? idk we made eye contact when his taxi nearly ran over my foot)

what got you into F1?

my mum! i love her and she’s just as much a passionate fan (and hater when appropriate) so it’s a nice thing to do together - especially because me and my dad are season ticket holders at chelsea so spend a lot of time together doing that so this is like my sport time with my mum (along with the olympics that’s our shit we’re very excited for the swimming). so i guess it was being around her watching it and listening to her and my dad argue about it! my mum is an ardent seb supporter and my dad is like a twitter account away from being in teamLH so canada 2018 (2019?) was VERY entertaining. also my uncle loves it so he likes that im proper into it (like have a sports journalism degree) and so we always chat about it - he’s trying to recruit me into motogp next

do you enjoy fanfic/RPF?

i mean i’ve written so much i must love it. lol jokes i do enjoy it and i feel like it helps me like people more (case in point: when i was trying to make myself enjoy the lando win i just read my own fics of him LOL)

but also its something fun to do that’s also creative and has helped me make new friends from all over

how do you view new fans?

ugh i hate the hate new fans get like not everyone can be born into loving a sport? if anything the more people that watch and love the sport the more money it’ll make? idk this whole superiority complex some fans have is just so unneeded for the sport and we all know why is majorly directed at girls. i do fear that some of the new fan behaviours could border on worrying - waiting outside hotels and ambushing drivers is stalking actually!

but overall im always happy to have new people in a sport - a bigger community is always good and new fans bring new perspectives which is good as older fans may just be desensitised to “normal” things in the sport but new eyes can remind them - hey halos are the best thing to happen to F1 and red flags in heavy rain are necessary.

if you could take over as any team principal for any team who would it be and why?

i know i previously dunked on ferrari but there needs to be an intervention because my girly max already has three championships and i need charles to get at least one so i can die happy - then ill move to mclaren, kick zak brown up the ass get a piastri championship and bounce (honourary race with willams or whatever team alex is with cause i need all three 2019 rookies to be race winners)

are your friends and family into F1 as well?

i feel like my other answers answered this but yeah! i also recently reconnected with an old primary school friend who is also really into it. i went to a sports uni so basically everyone there liked it as well (which means me and a friend did trek to the F1 arcade at 4am to watch aus 23 where she had a public meltdown over sainz (i enjoyed it)). also ive made a couple friends through working at races!

are you open to talking to other fans/making friends?

i always am! i am a year out of uni and working from home with all my home friends still at uni after taking gap years so i am big time lonely so always feel free to slide into my messages!

#f1 imagine #max verstappen #charles leclerc #oscar piastri #alex albon #ferrari #f1 #formula one #formula1 #tag

[dattosdan]

So, if you've been in the utdr community for a bit now you've probably heard of the sans otherworld theory, specifically the variant where sans comes from deltarune.

But the main consensus is that sans swaps or is transported to undertale sometime during the events of deltarune or after them, but like what if he was already swapped with the other sans by the time, we meet him in deltarune?

Guys what if the sans we talk to during deltarune is actually just sans from undertale playing it cool?

Guys what if like, if we ever get a second sans fight electric boogaloo, and we like kill him via weird route or something, he just turns into dust immediately unlike undertale sans who bled?

Guys what if the reason papyrus won't come out of the house has to do with the fact that he knows his brother isn't the same person?

Guys what if the loneliness of being separated from his friends is being offset by the fact that he has to keep it together to take care of a younger papyrus and that he's genuinely happy he's no longer trapped underneath a mountain? And therefore, he isn't as depressed as og sans?

Alright... I think I got all the intrusive thoughts out my system, I'm good now, no longer insane, now I can actually think about things with evidence rather than head canons with no tangible proof.

#ive been thinking about this a little too much lol #might write a fan fic about it or something #sorry i dumped this here #i knows its a lot less well thought out then my normal stuff #literally wrote this in 5 minutes #and im sick so im a bit woozy #deltarune #undertale #guys what if- #text post #deltarune sans #sans deltarune #utdr #undertale sans #sans #sans undertale #i mean it doesnt even have any proof #this thought process is mostly based off “it would be cool though” #deltarune headcanon

[kagoutiss]

as if it was never there at all.

#undertale #deltarune #utdr #gaster #ok ​little bit of rambling bc ive been catching up on a LOT of deltarune stuff #something something guy(s) who cant be perceived without also ceasing to exist #i had the thought yesterday that. gaster is sort of the anti-chara in a way. if you say his name he ‘disappears’ #the game crashes or resets etc. literally the opposite of invoking chara lol #plus how chara is so associated with deletion of worlds. and here gaster is wanting to create new ones #creating new worlds. creating a vessel for the player. creating connections #and its so much more sad when you think about how deltarune is like. fundamentally his attempt to connect with the player #he can maintain a connection with us. but we can’t see him. or show him his own name. or acknowledge his identity in any way #or else that connection will be severed. or he’ll disappear. or he’ll cease to have ever existed #mystery man goes away the moment you interact. egg man was never there but he gave you an Egg #etc etc #the white egg noelle was given in her game makes me think about this too because #that egg remained there the whole time she was afraid of it. it couldnt be thrown away. it wouldnt hatch. it was just There #and then when she comes back later and decides to take care of it like any of her other pets. THEN it disappears #’_____ left home due to happiness.’ #how do you form real lasting connections when the connection itself makes you disappear

[gncrezan]

i draw these two in this pose a lot cause i love the idea of the crown distracting R from their work, and R eventually ends up indulging them :’)

#i think ive doodled and posted it to this blog before ... the one where niyaz is leaning in for a kiss :) #atoc #a tale of crowns #rezan #niyaz rezai #my art #i miss these two so much . dear god . i cannot wait for the atoc drop ...... #seriously tho its been a hell of a week and drew this super quick now cause . everything is so overwhelming rn and they are SOOO comforting #like i needed to destress and my mind was like REZAN!!!! WHAT ABOUT REZAN #maybe this should have been cleaned up a little more but the bg simply wasnt working LOL... #so left it as is ..... dont look too close at anatomy pls .....

[rookflower]

the horrifying implications of Cinderpelt as a pawn of Starclan- trying everything she can to unsuccessfully stop her apprentice from leaving because she's terrified of the internalised idea of "failing" her clan and her job due to her impending death, while unaware that the entire Crowpool situation is intentional by Starclan for their own benefit to initiate the Power of Three prophecy and that her death in itself is to be Leafpool's motivation to stay- the idea that the stars, the ancestors and family and friends she devoted her life to always meant for her to die young and hopeless and were willing to manipulate her emotionally for the best outcome for them- is alone a piece of her character that's infinitely more heartwrenching and tragic and interesting than "she actually had a crush on Firestar and she's sad she can't date him :((" and I'm so mad that the latter is her primary legacy instead of any interpretations of her as a character that go beyond boring forbidden romance #17 that was barely even implied to begin with

#im sorry but with knowledge of how fucked up starclan is what they did to cinderpelt is. horrifyinggg #this specific interpretation is maybe a bit of a reach but it goes hand in hand with them lying to squirrel and leaf and so on #and also makes more sense in-universe as to why they 'reincarnated' her afterwards than literally just a cocktail of fanservice and ableism #hey sorry we put you on an inevitable death sentence so your apprentice could get pregnant but stay here lol. you can uh possess ur niece i #anyways sorry for all the cinderpelt talk ive been thinking a lot about her lately #she has such a weird reception in the fandom in that she's considered a 'fan favourite' but literally nobody cares about her too much #theres only like 4 cinderpelt maps with over 100k views and theyre all a couple years old at least #for good reason probably because there's a lot of ableism around her both canon and fanon #but still it's a wee shame since she's such a major character to the first two arcs that the little fanon about her there is is kinda borin #cinderpelt #warrior cats #i think shes a lesbian and i also think she should have been allowed to kill someone for fun

[bmpmp3]

i do think its kinda funny when i see someone in the year of our lord 2024 talk about vocal synth music like its all gone downhill since like 2010 because like dont get me wrong i love a good niconicodouga-ass 2008 ass vocaloid joint BUT also like. the past couple years have had the most fascinatingly creative and expressive uses of vocal synthesizers ive ever heard in my life DJFSKHJDFS dont write it all off just yet!!

#usually i only see that from people who havent actually listened to any vsynth music from the past 15 years so i understand why they got to #that conclusion. and also usually theyre people who didnt listen to much vsynth music in the first place LOL they just dont know #but it is still a little funny. brother there are things beyond your wildest dreams if u just look #like some personal highlights: the stuff by rinri - particularly their use of the meika girlies #dont carry our memories away is LIFECHANGING the whispers. the spoken parts. the BELTS #plus the haunting and unrelenting instrumentation. fantastic song #and naisho no pierced's propose + birthday + gift sort of trilogy of songs. gift especially has been unreal #again the dynamics of soft intimate whispers to belts but also those fuller high notes with edges of growlyness. #plus the songs just generally rock. and those LYRICS. absolutely intense like physically painful and frightening like #yearning and codependency and possession. and the tuning and production just amps it up more #OH and slave.v.v.r has been doing crazy things for even longer but i only started getting into his stuff recently and holy shit #love eater is like. the scariest vocaloid song ive ever heard not because of the lyrics. but because of the tuning #im like. scared. i cant stop listening to it. the heavy synthesized breathy main vocals and whispered harmonies plus the VOCAL FRY #i didnt realized vocaloid5? i think? has a vocal fry option built in i heard? thats crazy #but specifically in love eater the fry and growl is amped up so deep and loud and clear compared to everything else it like #emphasizes the artificiality of the voice while also amping up the expressiveness #its awesome. and on the older slave.v.v.r songs i heard i will hit you 8759632145 times with this piano. also so fucking cool #addicted to that song. 1) its a great jazzy rocky piano tune with this piano flourish at the end of each phrase that sounds fantastic #but also 2) the lyrics are insane. using kanji to write english?????? #people are doing wild ass things with vocal synths rn you guys #this isnt even getting into some of the really unique synths themselves too. adachi rei is awesome i love that shes just like #the perfect inbetween of sample based and reconstruction based vocals. shes a sample based synth #but her samples were drawn by hand LOL shes like dectalks granddaughter to me..... #a really good use of adachi rei is iyowa's heat abnormal/heat anomaly/whatever its called ITS AWESOME thats what it is hjrkfdgfd #i think the fact that vocal synths can be so realistic and clean and noiseless out the gate now has made people really stop worrying #about like. realism all together and looking more into expressiveness. omg vocal synth modernist movement

[orcelito]

OK so I have an inkling of an idea for a trigun ficlet. A one-shot, really. Not really any plot, but I just have the urge to write my own interpretation of Weird Plant Shit. Like for how much ppl tag this stuff as xeno, most of it's honestly pretty tame. Which kinda makes sense, considering a lot of this is being based off of the plants in stampede, which While uncanny are not NEARLY the amount of inherent horror of the plants in the manga. There's some FREAKY shit going on there. So like. You know. What if I took more inspiration from That for Vash's freaky shit?

#speculation nation #YES this is for a smut idea. dont judge me #ive never posted smut b4 bc ive exclusively been writing akeshu & theyre teenagers #im not interested in writing smut of teenagers #but i have my interests 😭 and i am an undeniable monster fucker. we been knew. #just. vague idea. ppl have run with the plant idea. & id wanna too. but in a different sort of way. #thinking more. venus fly trap kind of situation. NOT easily translatable to human biology #the kinds of shit that may trip even the most adventurous man up. but we all know he would take it in stride in the end. #idfk so much of the allure of this pairing to me is the inherent inhuman nature of vash's physical form. and how that manifests everywhere #the human and the angel. for all that entails. #i dont have an idea for an actual story for these characters yet. my brain is spinning them but it hasnt come up with that yet #but a lil smth self indulgent to just play around with Fun Ideas? i reaaally wanna go for it. #we'll see if i end up writing this. & if i end up posting it. #im both somehow Very solidly kinky and VERY solidly shy about it. aka why i barely post about that kind of stuff. #face in my hands just talking about this here. who knows how i'd fare with posting it. #but if i go thru the trouble of writing it you BET id go thru the trouble of posting it #and you B E T itd be angsty. the inherent longing and unsaid words. what am i if not an unrepentant angst writer lol #thoughts & ideas r spinning. i will have a merry little time. #uhm. do i need to tag this as anything. is this too tmi? i dont even know #WELL if u read the word 'xeno' and keep reading that's on U. sorry #here just in case if ppl r worried i will tag this as #tmi/ #sorry lol

[hecksupremechips]

Actually cry so goddamn hard when I think about Shinjiro Aragaki healing and being loved and having to learn to be okay with himself and being taken care of

#writing him has just been like. OOOOWOEOEOEOOE i piss tears i cant handle this shit this gay ass shit #i came up with an idea for just like a cute short one shot i wanna do soon and hnnnghh im so emo about it #very healing its like very hard to write some of the shit im gonna be writing cuz basically #some of it is just a little too real man and while i crave the angst and the drama i am just like #AND THEN EVERYONE HOLDS HANDS AND ITS OKAY PLEASE DONT CRY PLEASE #and ive mentioned how shinji has accidentally become nb to me now because i just kinda happened to write him that way without meaning to #and now another thing im noticing is that in my fic hes kinda bpd coded #it definitely wasnt intentional but now im accepting it as truth no one can stop me #i just really need him to be happy its more important to me than anything else man i need it for me #and he needs to be gay with aki they need to kissy and i think its funny cuz even in the parts where shinji is mad at aki and pushing him #away its like. he kinda has it bad lol and its clear he feels no actual hatred towards aki but more just self deprecation because he doesnt #feel good enough and like idk i just think about their respective roles in society like #aki is an honor student star boxer hero very attractive very kind very popular got adopted by a rich family #hes going places you know meanwhile shinji is a drop out who never had a family ever hes homeless hes sketchy hes on drugs #his reputation couldnt be any worse and he just leans into it and feels he has no future and hes worthless garbage #and aki could literally have anyone he wants you know he has an army of girls pining over him but he doesnt want them #HE WANTS SHINJI AND NO ONE ELSE HE SPENDS YEARS CHASING AFTER HIM #and shinji HATES it hes trying so hard to push him away and be the crusty delinquent and make aki see how worthless he really is #but aki just doesnt stop he loves him so much makes me sick SICK #and shinji really loves him back hes like not gonna shut up ever about aki hes like either doing it in a gay ass annoyed way #or hes like ‘haha omg aki is so cute though hes always trying so hard to be tough but hes just so sweet and gentle you know i hope he #doesnt push himself too hard if he got hurt id fall apart hes so silly i hope hes eating good i desire him carnally’ #yeah sorry gamers this is just a pairing i cant be normal about they mean so much to me personally the fate of the world rests upon them

[valentinesparda]

I want to talk more about self insert and self ship stuff but my god I feel like I need to be sat down and applied torture methods to be able to talk without being like *avoids topic with deflection avoids being nice by being mean avoids saying positive things by deflection etc etc*

#val.txt #like i have been thinking tboights but i also dont know how to put those thoughts into coherent strings of text #and im into way too many things that hardly anyone cares about and most of my selfship and insert lore requires like. #deep introspective thought and an understanding of the source material that makes one seem mentally unwell in how much detail they know #like yeah its one thing to be like 'yeah such and such character is my ex' or 'we are reincarnated soulmates' #but it is entirely another for you to actually understand the painful backflipping i have to do to even #a) allow myself the pleasure of being able to imagine we are kissing eachother #and b) the absolute mental gymnastics and lore ive had to fuck with to make my ships even exist in the first place #its practically impossible to hold a conversation with someone who doesnt know the source of my ships or inserts #simply because of how much my logical brain has to work through to be able to have me be even remotely happy #and idk if thats because of how i treat self inserting and self shipping or if its the acearo talking. perhaps both being in the same space #kind of makes it hard to exist in the current state of the selfship community #idk maybe im just a little insane lol

[pepprs]

last few hours in boston :(

#purrs #conference tag #we literally just got here and now we have to go 😭💔 i havent rly felt as enriched by this conference as i have in the past (though there’s #still 2 more sessions to go to incl the closing plenary and we’re getting lunch in the station before the train ride home) but ive walked #around so much and have spent time with people i love and some people i miss. and have been on adventures i have been looking forward to for #a rly long time though i am kinda bummed i never made it down to fanueil square. but… idk what happiness feels like anymore but maybe for me #it’s just absence of misery and despair. or contented ness. i have gotten a little triggered from time to time these last few days and ive b #been lonely in my hotel room but MAN it has been nice to not be miserable and suffering and to take walks and to not go to every session (ev #even though i do feel bad abt it like i missed 2 plenaries and an afternoon concurrent session which is more than i usually miss) and to #be in this city which feels so much like brighton and so uncity like in some ways. it’s so charming and omg i went to harvard and it was #NOTHING like what i imagined it to be / feel like.. just a quaint artsy quirky town. and the rest of the places ive been have been like that #too. and people LIVE here every day!!!!! there’s a big beautiful world here both above ground and below!!!! and im gonna be late to #breakfast but… i just feel nourished and healed in a way i wasn’t expecting to. I haven’t been this far away from home in 3+ years and #it’s just been really nice being somewhere else and going on adventures and seeing things surviving. i miss my grandparents a lot and im sad #to not be visiting them and to be unable to visit them now lol but it’s just rly nice and special being here. im goingto miss it so much and #im trying to savor every second. i wish we had one more day here and im a little sad to be going home lol #* what i meant when talking about happiness earlier is that i think… i have been happy these last few days. for the first time in a really #really long one. and that’s nice. it’s good to be happy again. and good to be here

[sealer-of-wenkamui]

I know she's relatively unpopular, but I feel like if people actually gave Danzou's character some thought for two seconds, I wouldn't see such irritating takes on Limbo, the idea that he was trying to help her is the one that bothers me the most. If you stop and really think what he put her through, it's apparent he's not trying to be helpful on any level, and its as he says, he's trying to devastate her and specifically her cause he has a fixation. Any "affection" for her is the hollow affection one might have for a favorite object, and I think that's what's interesting, a obsession of someone that does not love.

He repaired her body in Shimousa, so he could then mess with her and ultimately make her try to kill the people she cares about, then kills her. And I think this shows he means it when he told her to her face he was restoring her memories so her suffering would be much deeper later on when he planned to kill Kotarou in front of her.

And even if she did have mixed feeling about him restoring her precious memories I wouldn't buy it that he was trying to help because of his actions in Shimousa, but that's the thing. SHE DOESN'T EVEN HAVE ANY MIXED FEELINGS ON IT. Limbo is the one person she'll get hostile towards, she calls him "irredeemably evil", she uses moonflower, which she hates using, on him (twice), and she glares at him in Chaldea.

(Also Koyan "torments humans for fun" skaya was able to become a beast but not them because of lack of love, so I highly doubt he has any innate desire to help people, rather he just wants to prove he's the best, and specifically, better than Seimei.)

#infel's fate tag #infel's fate bitching again lmaoo i was thinking about this too much again today #maybe this is why im at least blessed that all LimDan stuff ive seen (little as there is) has all been SUPER good #they always seem to care about her character a lot and i appreciate that #i love her character and i feel like people don't really think about her as a proper character when thinking about him if that makes sense #idk. anyway. bleeh #i love Limbo but he's always been an arrogant and petty man and if anything he's... pitiful? #fate does seem to be a tad more sympathetic towards his living self than abe no seimei monogatari (he is moe lol) but that part still stand

[corpsoir]

literally i know like 4 people off the top of my head who have/want to get tattoos over their scars surgery or not and want weird shit on their scars. whoever made that video still asks their mommy to cut the crusts of their sandwiches

like to me it just feels like being annoying about medicalising being trans to the point of not even letting people see the fun and joyful potential there is to these scars. to some people they are purely medical and i completely understand that and i absolutely dont want to take it away from them but for a lot of people top surgery scars in all their forms are so much more than just "a surgical procedure". to me, my scars carry so many stories and memories and pain and joy and life and humanity. playing around with shapes and styles of how i draw scars is one of the best things i know with my art!!

ANY kind of scar tells a story and i like incorporating them in my art and characters and telling people to draw them in a pure medical way is just so boring when they have such huge potential. plus it just looks weird if it doesnt fit the style. my style is kinda sharp and pointy in places so i draw all scars sharp and pointy and i try to vary the shapes of different characters too because i want to give them different stories and personality with the shapes, thats just how visual storytelling works let me do the thing im good at LMAO

#i dont want to shit too much on the person who made that tutorial i just think they have a really boring perspective #that. TO ME. MY INTERPRETATION HERE. touches on being a little truscummy with how medicalised youre 'supposed' to draw and view these scars #im not saying this person is that but you cant just go about telling ppl to not draw in a certain way because it personally irks you lmao #whatever its fine ive just been in a hater mood about this . its literally not a big deal its just a bit tonedeaf lol #ask

[caffeinatedopossum]

My last vent post could have literally been summarized by me just saying "how tf are some people just okay?!? I'm freaking out over here and I'M RIGHT"

#yeah anyways dont let anime protagonist decieve you #being severely traumatized didnt unlock special powers it just made people tell me i have wisdom #but in reality that wisdom is something i deeply repress and try to hide from others #because it reminds me of how many things none of us will be able to control and how #anyone lacking an understanding of that isnt something i would ever take from them #you deserve to be happy. even if it means blaming yourself for things that arent your fault sometimes #because regret is still better than despair #maybe people can have a little self deception. as a treat #since i lost mine ive been burdened by fear and inevitability and conflict that i cant quite decipher #though i guess i felt that in my self deception too... hmm #maybe it would be okay to not hide what j think after all #maybe what i do or dont say about things wont affect people that much after all #nah im still too scared lol #also sorry if i worried anyone. i will be okay just feelin a little paranoid is all

[grimmshood]

i hate fake bitches *ten seconds* me and the bestie image but its "i hate the idea of marriage and it kind of scares the shit out of me!!!!!" *ten seconds later* these characters are my wives and marriwd to me

#txt #rambling in tags like crazy dont mind me #ive been opposed to it for 8 years and counting and my relatives still think i might eventually change my mind on getting married #Like .... given the situation youve put me in it's not fucking happening lol!!! #unless i find a beard LMAO #like my familys full of homophobes so i cant marry a woman! and im not marrying a man cause theres all sorts of shit that could happen #that i am fucking scared of!!!! #and i dont know why ive been thinking about it more often #like how much it freaks me out #and it doesnt help that like.... i dont have good examples #what with my parents being. Well. and The Incident. #i wish i could be a roach and live in the corner of some girls bathroom forever #imagining f/os and stufd wrt marriage has started to set me off too i think i thinkt hats why i think abt it more #liek.... isk.... i dunno #freaks me out a little