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cy-cyborg · 8 months

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Tips for wring amputees: its ok if your amputee can't repair their own prosthetics

There's a trope in fiction for amputees to always be these mechanical geniuses who can make and repair their own prosthetics, endlessly tinkering away and improving them. This isn't a particularly trope, and i dont think its harmful or anything, but in reality, prosthetics are REALLY, REALLY complicated, and a lot of amputees cant do their own repairs. And thats ok. Like, prosthetic creation and repair is way, way harder than I think people expect. Well outside the skillset of your standard mechanic, handy man or craftsperson.

People who make and repair prosthetics are called prosthetists. To become a prosthetist, most countries around the world today require you to have completed a bachelor's degree in specifically in prosthetics and orthotics, which covers not only how to make a prosthetics (and orthodics) but a great deal of medical knowledge, physics, how different forces impact "non-standard" bodies, the additional biological wear-and-tear that comes with being an amputee and so much more. This will qualify you to do the job of fitting/making the prosthetic socket (the part that attaches to your body) and putting premade components together to make a functioning device. On top of this, many prosthetists are also expected to have artistic skills, sewing skills, good physical strength and dexterity, IT skills, and more recently, knowledge of 3D modelling and printing.

You want to make all the high-tech components the prosthetists put together to make the full prosthetic? The requirements for that vary country to country, but most will require at least some level study in the field of engineering and/or medicine, on top of what was already required for the prosthetics course.

The reason for all this is because even "basic" prosthetics are extremely finicky, and messing up one thing will have a domino effect on the rest of the body, especially in more complicated prosthetics. It can also result in people getting severally injured if anything is even slightly off. many leg amputees for example end up with spinal issues due to extremely minor issues with their prosthetic that weren't caught until years later, and by then the damage had been done.

Some amputees do learn to do basic repairs. This is most common in places like the US, where a visit to the prosthetist can cost hundred to thousands of dollars (depending on your insurance), but it's also quite common in rural parts of countries like Australia, where cost isn't an issue but access is due to vast distances between major cities. I was personally in this category; as a kid, my nearest prosthetist was 6 hours away. My prosthetist was able to teach my dad, who later taught me, how to do some of the simple repairs, but we still needed to go in every few weeks for the more complex stuff (Kids prosthetic need more adjusting than adults because they're still growing. Also I was rough on my prosthetics and broke them a lot lol).

But even after being taught how to do repairs and having my prosthetics for 20+ years, I only ever did these sorts of repairs to my below-knee prosthetic. I will not do any repairs of any kind to my above knee leg, which is much more technologically complex. Every time I tried, I made it worse to the point where the leg was unusable. I just leave those repairs to the guy who went to university to learn how to do it, and sometimes even he needs to send it off to someone with even more specialist knowledge when it's really badly messed up lol. Last time that happened Australia post lost the package. Not really relevant to this post, I just find the idea of it being sent to the wrong place by accident hilarious, it was one of my more realistic legs too so someone probably had a heart attack when they opened that package lmao.

Anyway, back on track lol.

This isn't even touching on the fact that on some more advanced prosthetics, many features are actually locked behind a security barrier only prosthetists can access. My prosthetic knee has an app on my phone I can pair it to, that allows me to change certain settings and swap between certain modes for different activities that tell the leg to change its behaviour depending on what I'm doing (e.g. a mode for running, a mode for cycling etc). but most of the more in-depth settings I can't access, only my prosthetist can, and he can only gain access to those settings with a security key given to him by the manufacturing company that requires him to provide proof of his credentials to receive it. I don't really agree with this btw, something about being locked out of my own leg's settings makes me feel a bit of an ick, but it's set up like this because people used to be able to access these settings and they would mess with things to the point their leg was virtually unusable. Because altering one setting had a domino effect on all the others, and a lot of folks weren't really paying attention to what they were messing with, all their prosthetists could do was factory reset the whole leg, which causes some issues too. Prosthetic arms are often similarly complex, as I understand it and have similar security barriers in place for more advanced arms. I don't know for sure though, so take that with a grain of salt.

All this to say these are incredibly delicate, finicky and complex pieces of equipment. There's nothing wrong with having a techy amputee character who can do their own repairs, but in reality, that is pretty rare, and its ok to have your character need to see a prosthetist or someone more knowledgeable than them. It's a part of the amputee experience I don't see reflected very often in media. In fact, the only examples I can think of in fiction (meaning not stories based on real people) where this is reflected are Full metal alchemist.

technically I think Subnautica Below Zero also mentions prosthetists are a thing in that world, but its a very "blink and you'll miss it" kind of thing...in fact I did miss it until my last playthrough lol.

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vaguely-concerned · 1 month

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Ever since watching The Wire for the first time, my brain has doggedly kept working away at the Especially the lies of it all, and specifically at how much the structure beneath the different stories Garak tells contributes to the overall meaning of what he’s trying to say. While the contradicting narratives of course expertly obscure the factual circumstances of his getting exiled, using them also allows him to tell aspects and facets of the emotional truth I don’t think he ever could have, if he’d simply told the actual story of what happened. (It’s very Varric-core of him honestly.)

The first story — the ‘oh, you think you know me?’ story — says I have done things that would sicken you if you knew any detail of it. It’s clearly meant to scare Bashir away so he’ll leave him to die shamefully in peace already lol. But it’s also one of his (probably much-needed lbr) little lessons to Julian that are so frequent in the beginning, given while Garak still has some hold on himself — “Don’t be so quick to forgive me if you don’t even know what I’ve done; what would you do if this really were the sum total of what I am?” (And Julian seems to surprise him by going ‘Well, exactly the same thing, because no matter who you are I am a doctor. But I sort of take your point.’)

The second story — the letting the orphans go story — says I have failed to smother my soul in its cradle when it was required of me, and I regret that more than anything I’ve done. To my ears this is the one most shot through with active self-loathing too, which is interesting. He’s officially lost the control he’s been clinging to and it’s about to get ugly. His TL;DR is ‘Sentiment is the greatest weakness of all’, even all the way back here. (Which is the one lesson Julian steadfastly refuses to learn, which I think in turn does some serious rearrangement of Garak’s soul over the course of the show haha. Get uno reversed into the process of loving and being loved without shame asshole.) This is also where he builds up to admitting to having any sort of need for companionship or closeness at all and — so much worse — that Julian’s role in his life actually has fulfilled some of that need, and he’s DRIPPING with defensive venom over it b/c well I get it Garak vulnerability is scary it can take a person like that.

(I also feel there’s something honest and forbidden in ‘Suddenly the whole exercise seemed utterly meaningless’. I suspect ‘actually… why the fuck are we even doing this???’ is not a welcome sentiment in an Obsidian Order water cooler environment, no matter what you’re saying it about lmao. The very first seeds of him deconstructing the things he’s been taught about Cardassia and his work might be hinted at here, though they of course take a looong time to come to any real fruition.)

The third story — the ‘Elim was my best friend’ story — says hey, remember that thing you said once, about how sometimes, you have to be loyal to yourself before you can be loyal to anything else? Well. guess what. I couldn’t even be that lmao. It also furthers that thread of being divided from yourself, split, that having ‘Elim’ as a separate person around in all versions of the story brings in. He’s in control of himself again, but he essentially hands his life and soul over to Julian to decide what should be done with them.

I’ve done horrible things and it finally caught up with me, I’m getting what I deserve → I let sentiment master me and the fact that I’m too weak to do what’s needed of me shames me more than the evil I’ve done → I fucked up. I betrayed myself and everything I held to, all for nothing, and I have no one to blame for it but myself. But it’s very nice that you’re here anyway, Doctor. (Wow. I didn’t realize quite how isolated and lonely that last one was before right now. The way Tain has shaped him really has just… locked him completely into himself, huh.) We can also see a movement through from a completely professional context in the first story, to an intensely interpersonal and internal context in the last one — even his fake stories spiral in towards intimacy, which I think is what he longs for here even if he can’t quite like. Touch that without the stories as a buffer yet, it’s clearly like touching a hot stove for him to interact with it too directly.

And you know what I find incredibly interesting the whole way through? Even on his deathbed, where he’s dying from the thing Tain had put in his head, he’s protecting Tain. He puts all the blame for where he is on himself (‘My future was limitless, until I threw it away’), even if he has to employ a strange twisty logic where he’s split himself into two to do it. Don’t get me wrong, Garak has done horrific things all on his own haha, but it’s notable that he almost isolates Tain from that. ‘Tain was the Obsidian Order. Not even the Central Command dared challenge him. And I was his right hand.’ Tain in Garak’s stories is this infallible implacable weirdly distant figure, even now. Indeed, as will make a lot of sense with the revelations further down the line, more than anything it seems the gaze of an abused child desperate for recognition looking up at an idealized (if not in any way nurturing) parent.‘He was retired at that point; he couldn't protect me’, Garak says, as if what he’d need protection from in the first place isn’t Tain himself lmao, as if Tain had no active part in any of this. He never lets blame touch Tain at all. At this stage he would rather consider himself a broken flawed tool than accept that the hands that have wrought and wielded him have ever had any fault in them. AND in the middle of it all, with plausible deniability, on death’s door and knocking meekly to be let in before he must finish the mortifying ordeal of being known and test the even more daunting possibility of being loved, Garak at the same time manages to drop the breadcrumb trail of clues to make it possible for Julian to find Tain if he so chooses and gets in the ‘sons of Tain’ thing too for future dramatic irony purposes. Truly he is the Michelangelo of lying. Every falsehood a multifaceted masterpiece. Elim ‘achieving a state of intertextuality in real life is possible if you work hard and believe in yourself’ Garak. I love him so much.

I think all of this is why “I forgive you. For whatever it is you did,” works so well, because it too works on a structural level. It’s such a deceptively multilayered response — it has the syntax of a joke, in a way, and it is kind of funny even under the circumstances, but delivered with such earnest warmth and fondness. It’s both recognition and acceptance (forgiveness!). It’s saying ‘I finally understand enough of what you’re trying to tell me beneath and through all that, in whatever way you’re capable of, I see you’ and ‘my answer hasn’t changed (bitch)’. The forgiveness Julian offers here is complete — on principle, and out of personal feeling and empathy (only one of which Garak deigns to respond to during the second story, where he calls it ‘smug Federation sympathy’, placing it more completely on the principle side than it probably is. ‘Dude you’re my friend please don’t just lie down and die in a completely avoidable way on me, who else is going to not only tolerate but actually gleefully enjoy me being annoying as fuck over lunch’ seems to be the subtext that’s a lot harder to acknowledge and invite in for both of them. And yet Tain seems perfectly clear on the fact that Julian is Garak’s friend, which, y’know. Must be fun living with the knowledge that Tain has eyes everywhere looming over you every day haha guess you’d just have to tune that out.)

Most of all — ’Don’t give up on me now, Doctor’... and he didn’t! He didn’t. Augh. Ow.

#garashir #elim garak #julian bashir #star trek ds9 #ds9 #star trek #ds9 meta #S2EP22 The Wire #alternate title: baby's first brush with unconditional love through unreliable narration lol #I'm not sure I got to say everything I want to in this/found the exact right words in places or hit all the nuances #but god help me I so desperately need this out of my brain to free up some disc space so go forth little meta haha be free #I'm sure I'll come back to you in time #meta #enabran tain #(derogatory)

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danandphilplay · 22 days

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im going to put my answers below bc i know some of these vids are likely not returning to dnp and i do agree with that i just wanted to do a fun poll abt if you could have another of these vids then which would you choose. ofc like ive said before we have no control over dnp uploads and i fully know some of these won’t come back lol

ok first of all i don’t think pinof is coming back and i think that’s been clear for ages anyways like ten is a nice number to leave it. HOWEVER i do think an april fools dapc pinof would be hilarious. answering crafties questions and whatever they send to craft universe dnp.

same with amazingdan BUT maybe there’s a slight chance of reacting to amazingdan. maybe not since so much time has already passed since pinof reactions (four months …..) honestly out of the options i’m not that bothered about pinof or amazingdan i feel like they’re classic dnp content that’s fine left as it is

ok for the pizza mukbang thing i don’t care for it to be a mukbang video lol like the actual thing was the nice sit down talk vibes pyjama pizza w friends maybe this is exactly what dan means abt being parasocial 😭 but that video is nice so i don’t think the actual mukbang part of it is that important it’s more the sit down talk style vid

i think i would do anything for another day in the life but i feel like it is prob peak parasocial content. would it count as phouse tour probably. do i think there will be a phouse tour no bc it sounds like it is still having a lot of work done 😭 and i honestly don’t really care abt it… i think the sims renovation was fun and an insight into their interior design opinions lol and that is enough for me

i put it takes two bc a lot of people want to see the next bit i like the game but not rly enough. idk it’s been awhile since that first vid and in terms of other games and things from dnp i don’t rly mind about it takes two being ignored 😭

i know baking is not a discontinued thing anymore bc HALLOWEEN but BUT i really believed easter baking would be a thing 💔 dapc had so much put into it that i kind of forgot about wanting a baking vid but 💔 i can’t lie i think i got set on the expectation for it. like the baking vids have always been absolute classic staple dnp content but definitely the cinnamon roll one was like the baking vids to the extreme… the full potential AND THE BAKE WAS GOOD TOO. the vid was also pretty popular. so my expectations for easter were a bit high. ok so if this poll is like magically summon a dnp vid 🪄 maybe id consider baking because i just love it so much like irl as a hobby but also then dnp doing one of my fav things too and it being so fun idk it’s some of the best dnp content imo. i would love them to try a series of making food from videogames but no offence to them i don’t get the vibe that they cook a lot…… so i think it might not happen. but dil is turning TEN in september so maybe dnp special dil birthday cake baking vid 💔 pleaese pleasemaybe

i think tumblr tag is totally plausible although ik the april fools tumblr tag thing 💔 bc the twitter vid happened i think they’ll do a tumblr one at some point. there’s so much amazing art on here not just fanart but written stuff video and photo edits so i’d want them to see all of that as well as the funny stuff. this isn’t like top of my list of things i’d want to see but it’s definitely one of the more plausible things

dapc behind the scenes content its either happening or it will never be spoken of

honestly idk if they would do reactions to the super amazing project. bc like what vids would they choose. maybe i can see them referencing it or discussing it if someone asked or in a live but idk about reaction vids.

ok draw my life would be fun and i’d watch them. i’d watch an updated dil draw my life too. they put so much effort into that dil draw my life. maybe an updated one for dil’s 10th birthday will happen? that would be pretty fun.

i think if i had to choose it would be a ditl vid. top 3 would be ditl, mukbang or literally just any sit down talk vid, and another baking video. ditl may literally just be bc of nostalgia i don’t really see it happening again but who knows. again just a poll about which vid you’d want to see if you could magic up a dnp vid i definitely know some of these aren’t coming back or very unlikely to

#dan howell #amazingphil #dan and phil #dan and phil games #dapg #dan and phil poll

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iamthat-iam · 8 months

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Hi Bry ("Bry" 🤔 lol you know), I hope you're having a lovely day! Thanks for your patience with me as I always send a thousand questions haha 💀 I wanted to send this one over asks in case anyone else is wondering about it. No worries about getting to this ask if you can't, I know you probably have a bajillion and I am grateful for your time!

I wanted to ask you a question related to something I see ND blogs talking about a lot, related to the ego's desires (don't worry, this is NOT a manifestation related question but rather a clarification question on ego vs Self). I see a lot of ND bloggers talking about how once you drop the ego and realize Self you can then experience anything and everything you want and dream any beautiful dream because you know that you are everything and are absolutely, 100% limitless. But the phrase, "anything and everything you want" is a confusing phrase to me, because Self doesn't have any preference towards the ego's desires and instead feels lovingly neutral and blissful towards everything, including suffering. So then why do people say you can have everything "you want" once you recognize Self in reference to becoming aware of the ego's desires? Even the idea of changing the channel if "you" don't like the show you're watching, that's still the ego wanting to be free of itself and not liking the show. So why would Self ever want to change the channel once it has been realized, or, why would Self want to dream a specific dream if it has no preference towards that dream?

My interpretation of it is that once you realize you are the lovely, limitless Self, manifesting the ego's desires for the ego's enjoyment is just a bonus FOR the ego. You (as self) have the power to give the ego that You used to identify with anything it wants. This is because You absolutely love Your creation (the character You used to be identified as), because Self loves all of Its creations, and it is fun to give the sweet character You've been playing the gift of everything it wants, because it's fun to love it up. Or maybe You as Self want to give the ego a little boost of everything it wants before identifying with it again, because it's all part of the fun game of awareness and getting lost in the play. These are the answers I've come to myself, but I wanted to ask another person to see if they had a different interpretation.

I guess what the question boils down to is this: why would one want to "become aware of a different channel/dream/ego/character" once you realize Self, if Self is lovingly neutral towards it all? Isn't that just re-identification with the ego? Ultimately I know it comes down to love and fun and enjoying the play and I should probably just relax and have fun haha, but this definitely has confused me a little when I see ND bloggers talking about it. Maybe it's just because a lot of us come from LOA and that's where the need to address it comes from. But yeah! Was just curious what you think about this.

Anyway! I hope this makes sense, it's a little hard to put into words but I am hoping it is clear this isn't a manifestation question and more a question of clarification question haha. Thanks for your time and energy and I hope you are doing so, so wonderfully!

Hi "Bunny"! 💙

So it seems that we have similar interpretations. The Self has so much love for it's creations so why not give them all better circumstances to live under?

The Self wanted to experience life in all sorts of ways possible, including the suffering aspect, and it's done it, billions of times. The goal has already been accomplished right?

Now that you are awake and you aren't attached to anything that is going on because it isn't you, the illusion is gone. You no longer think that it's you going through circumstances. The game is pretty much over. You won 😂 At some point you go, "well that was fun. Time for me to do something different."

So it's not exactly changing everything so the ego is satisfied, it's more like, "well... What more is there to do here?" If you DID choose to create a new dream or change the channel. You do it because you can.

#non dualism #nondualism #consciousness

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98chao · 2 months

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Sonic Prime thing

so basically after i watched Sonic Prime S3 (on the day it came out) i was left pretty unsatisfied with the weird storytelling, plot holes and loose ends and decided to start brainstorming a re-imagining for it and drew some designs...

so this is gonna be long but i wanna preface this by saying i'm not a writer or even that good at character design 😭!!!! and also the majority of this is like from almost 2 months ago and it's very incomplete so i haven't done much thought on it i just had some ideas and ran with it Tbh. so if stuff doesn't make much sense Lmk bc a multiverse story is a very big thing to tackle, you really have to pay attention to the little stuff for everything to be complete.

also i like stuff with darker themes so if a lot of this is like "a Sonic show wouldn't do that" well. Yeah. this isn't a pitch to SEGA it's just my own thing LOL

(also also we're just gonna throw out the whole "Prime is canon to the games" here, i use the games as a basis but i wouldn't say this is in the realms of canon for multiple reasons)

~ The Main Stuff ~

so pretty much i went into this mostly thinking about changing the shatterverses while still keeping the base ideas that Prime had, and also a bit about how the shatterverse works in the first place. so i have some bullet points that i wrote down. i haven't watched s1&2 in a long time so i don't remember too much of the lore they already established, so if some of this is just reiterating what they said in the show then that's my bad

i wasn't exactly sure how it made sense that a single rock in some random cave conveniently in green hills had control of the entire universe so i want the explanation for why breaking the prism had this kind of effect to be something else (or to just change the prism to be something different) but i'm not sure exactly what. definitely not like "it was an illusion like the phantom ruby" or some stupid shit but it felt off that something completely world (universe) ending was so easily accessible. anyway.

Sonic explicitly doesn't exist in each alternate universe because he was the one who broke the prism. Sonic being the final piece that brings the universe together should probably have bigger lore implications as well

i think this is already what's in canon but Shadow used chaos control as the prism got shattered, causing himself to get fragmented across time and space as well.

unlike in the show, Shadow still has alternate versions of himself in each of the universes, but he has to kinda do an EEAAO and swap into their consciousness for him to be able to enter their respective universes (which takes a lot of energy bc its literally dimension travel so he can't do it a lot). his actual body is stuck in the void which means its at risk of erosion and also any hazard in the void like asteroids n stuff. it also explains why he's greatly weakened in the show (because his ass should not have been handed to him that easily in s3) cuz bits of his . being. is split across each universe, and can only be completed by the prism.

the void decays life which adds a higher stake to Sonic needing to complete the prism asap and also why Shadow is so hellbent on getting him to do it quickly. his actual, original self is slowly dying. (adds a bit of a character flaw too like the zombot arc, because you'd think the ultimate lifeform would be resistant to erosion. maybe at first he thinks he'll be fine and does the dimension travelling for fun until he starts feeling Really drained)

before i get to the individual universes, i'll talk a bout Sonic's character real quick because hoo boy, was it BAD in Prime. no shade to anyone who enjoyed his character in Prime, but as a show that claims to be "canon to the games", he was embarrassingly out of character. if it were just another version of him like movie Sonic i wouldn't really be so weirded out by it. so i wanna just say right off the bat that i'm using my own favourite iteration of Sonic as a reference for his character, which is the characterization from Sonic X.

i think when the prism gets properly explained, Sonic would kind of put 2 and 2 together and realize completing the prism would erase the other universes. and rather than being all ambiguous about it like Prime was, here it very explicitly would be that restoring the prism will erase the shatterverse. so Sonic get's really stuck between a rock and a hard place, because restoring the prism brings his friends and world back, but then he's effectively killing thousands of people, many of them who look exactly like his friends, all for the sake of his own world.

i think this is the kind of dilemma that would be really good for a character like Sonic, who's carefree and always does what he believes to be the right thing regardless of what other people say. his conflict with Nine isn't even all that different from his conflict with Merlina. but would he be okay with being enemies with someone who's literally just his little brother? i don't think Sonic would have tried to reason with Nine as much as he did in Prime, attachment be damned, but i still think it would still be hard for him to come to terms with the fact that Nine is his enemy and that in the end he would have to erase him too.

this is all i wanna say about Sonic rn because truth be told i'm not exactly sure how different the decisions he made in Prime would be here since i haven't thought too much on it, i would have to rewatch the show (god forbid) to figure that out lol.

~New Yolk City~

so i actually have designs for this, some of them have went through changes but they're all pretty "initial concepts". i wanna say that first off, i wanted this to be explicitly an alternate timeline and not just an alternate universe. one where Sonic doesn't exist in the main timeline so nobody really does anything to stop Eggman and he takes over the world. the designs are deliberately edgy so i call it sonic underfell in my notes lol

also, because a dystopian Sonic premise already exists in the form of SatAM... we got Sally Acorn back :D i didn't include all the Freedom Fighters for fear of the cast getting too big, but Nicole is here too because i love Sonic comic's robo assistants like Nicole and Kintobor. Sonia and Manic were also considered as added characters since Sonic Underground also has a dystopian premise, but i think it would be weird to add Sonic's siblings in a world where he doesn't exist, so it's not like they'd have a little 'OMG he's my long lost brother' moment. like no they don't even know who he is LOL.

alright so for character info i'll start with Nine because he's like the 3rd most important character in the show. i have a few different sketches of him, most incomplete... and for the third one my friend wanted him to look more emo. i wanted to add a bit more to that design but i wasn't sure what to do. if anyone has suggestions lmk

just like in the show, bc Sonic never meets Tails, Tails doesn't get saved from bullying and becomes very jaded. as for the robot face and tails, i think in the show they really drive it home how Nine values robots over people very much, going as far as to make robot clones of his friends in order to replace them. so... robot body parts doesn't seem too out of the realm for what he'd do! it's a very good parallel to what i have planned for Eggman/the Chaos Council it's also very fucking gruesome and sad esp because hes like 8 years old..

also, i'd really love it if he wasn't just weirdly evil the way he was in Prime S3. because no the hell he is not evil, it felt like a cheap way to get you to stop sympathizing with him until the very last moment where he had a change of heart. he's just a small, traumatized kid who was shown friendship for the first time only to realize that Sonic only cared about him because he was a Tails and actually pretty much wanted him dead (even if this all wasn't exactly true, i can genuinely see why he felt this way).

next i'll talk about who the main extra characters in this universe will be, which is Sally and Nicole.

so obv the resistance is called the Freedom Fighters, and Sally is the commander (like she should've been in Sonic Forces/IDW, but alas, she is dead to SEGA). she'd have a much more serious personality compared to her Archie/SatAM counterpart. where she'd usually banter with Sonic in Archie, here she would straight up tell him to gtfo. the aim of the Freedom Fighters in current time isn't really to fight to get their world back, just to survive and preserve what they still have.

just like in other media, Nicole is Sally's AI assistant slash potential love interest who does all the tech-y stuff, like scanning the area for threats, hacking things, etc. which gives them a bit of more power against the enemy without needing Nine's help.

next we got Amy aka Rusty Rose, this time she's fully a robot instead of being only half of one, and i'll expand on why. (also to note i didn't look at other Metal Amy fan designs when making this just to try and keep this a bit more original lol)

so, obviously being inspired by SatAM and Archie, roboticization is a concept that would be reintroduced here through Rusty Rose. she was previously a freedom fighter who got a bit reckless and was captured, and was roboticized before her allies could save her. she's kind of used as a cautionary tale among the Freedom Fighters as a way to hammer in don't be reckless and don't get caught.

i remember in Sonic Prime they tried to use the flicky 'powering' her as a way to keep her connection with humanity, which was great except for the fact that she still had half a mobian face so she wasn't even fully robot. in this case, i decided to make her fully robot and keep the flicky, except this time it is genuinely powering her lifeforce unlike whatever they did in the show. obviously taking it out for a bit just to showcase the fact she does have a flicky won't insta-kill her, but she will slowly die without the flicky inside of her. not sure why the Chaos Council didnt just slap a chaos drive in there but whatever lol, it's nice symbolism anyway.

also just a note, she can shoot bullets out of her fingers if you were wondering why her hands looked like that. yes its an Aigis Persona 3 reference. but also she no longer uses her hammer because as a robot she's stripped of her personality and autonomy, and the Piko-Piko hammer was like an Amy signature weapon, who Rusty Rose no longer is at this point. but mostly it's an Aigis Persona 3 reference. We ball

next is Rouge, who's no longer a leader of the Freedom Fighters, but just a spy/intelligence agent who still has an eye for shiny things.

in the inital art i drew of her i named her Agent Rebel, but honestly Agent Rouge works just fine because yknow. Rouge is just the word for red in french. if they really have to all have different names then Agent Red also works too, but it might be a bit on the nose. anyway she's apart of the Freedom Fighters as their spy, something they desperately need because of the constant surveillance around new yolk. of course she's still the morally gray bastard she usually is, so she always desires compensation for her efforts, especially on the more dangerous missions.

the reason why i demoted her from leader is because Rouge is really not the leader type, maybe you could give her a leading role if it were a smaller group like Team Dark, but when its a whole resistance she's genuinely not cut out for it, especially because she's not particularly selfless and definitely doesn't give too much of a shit about the well being of others. here she understands very well that her life is also at risk, so aiding the Freedom Fighters is pretty much her only choice.

next we got Knuckles who is definitely not having a good time. he never met Sonic so he's very distrusting towards everyone, even allies. he lived on Angel Island until it was attacked by Eggman and he lost the Master Emerald. unfortunately i didn't draw anything full body or coloured so i only have this sketch

being from a clan of warriors, i'd say its a no-brainer that he'd be co-commander of the Freedom Fighters. as for all the injuries, they're from a time where he was captured. to compensate for his... lack of knuckles... he now wears brass knuckles. he's definitely the most angry and vengeful of all the different versions of Knuckles, because he feels as if he's been disgraced in multiple ways, and he sees the Freedom Fighters as a means to an end. his pure, unadultered rage definitely helps with taking out enemies tho.

okay, i mentioned that Shadow would have alternate versions of himself and lucky for yall i did draw a design for New Yolk Shadow, who's named Terios and is inspired by that beta design.

Terios isn't apart of the Freedom Fighters, but he's not on the side of the Chaos Council. hes kind of an anti-hero vigilante, he's cordial with Rouge but not really interested in the Freedom Fighters. he kinda does his own shit. realistically, since New Yolk is an alternate timeline where Sonic doesn't exist, and it's implied that Gerald based Shadow off of Super Sonic then technically Shadow shouldn't exist but hey, this is the one plot hole i'm not gonna try to mend. We Ball. Shadow exists because he's goated like that.

anyway his backstory is the same but because everything is so Fucked Up he never really gets the chance to explode the world like he wanted. since he's not on the evil side i'll say that Eggman wasn't the one who woke him up tho and he got talked out of his homicidal urges. who woke him up? idk i'll think about it

now for another added character... Silver!!! but he goes by the alias "Venice"... because his beta design is called Venice LOL

before i explain Silver's deal, i'll talk abt how i imagine time works in the Sonic universe. basically, the future isn't something predestined and is actively changed by events in the present. this is in fact something that 06 contradicts since the future was messed up before Sonic even met Elise, but that in and of itself contradicts Sonic CD which does the whole "actions in the present affect the future" thing with the good future/bad future. so i went with CD's time mechanics because it makes more sense for this story. also 06 isn't canon so #WeBall

so Silver, being from the future, wakes up one day to find everything all fucked up again. except now he's in the present too. he tries to ask ppl if they know where Sonic is, assuming that of course Sonic would know what happened, but nobody seems to know who he's talking about. Silver eventually crosses paths with Shadow/Terios and asks him where Sonic is, but even Terios doesn't know who Sonic is (at this point, our Shadow hasn't linked his consciousness w/ Terios) so Silver is just really fucking lost and doesn't know what the hell is happening, why it's happening and why nobody seems to know who Sonic is.

he ends up following Terios around as sort of an apprentice type thing because he's the only familiar face so far and he really needs to understand what's going on. Terios isn't very happy about it but can tell Silver's a pretty strong person he would want as an ally, so he keeps him around. Silver wears a cloak and goes by the alias Venice as a way to protect his identity.

so obv when Sonic shows up he KNOWS Sonic fucked up real bad somehow. cue the 'it's no use! take this!' loop

(Blaze isn't here because she's relaxing and enjoying a cup of tea in her palace. also trying to tackle how the prism affects the Sol Dimension will make things way more convoluted)

~ New Yolk City: The Chaos Council ~

okay... NOW we talk about Eggman. so maybe you've noticed i kept switching between saying Eggman and the Chaos Council, and i will explain.

the Chaos Council do still exist in this reimagining, but Eggman also exists. Kind of.

basically my idea for the Chaos Council was that it was originally just Eggman ruling the world (btw his name would be Robotnik because nobody was there to call him Eggman), but here comes the inspiration from Archie again, and now he's split himself into 5 robots to help rule over New Yolk City. and i say it's inspired from Archie because i very vividly remember that Robotnik fucking died in Archie and then uploaded his consciousness into a robot or some shit, and then when it came time for his modern design to be incorporated into the comic he literally switched robot bodies to become modern Eggman. So Yeah.

multiple facets of himself get uploaded into robot bodies, because what's the point of living a mortal fleshy life when you can be a sick ass immortal shiny robot (throwback to how i said it would be a parallel to Nine) and these different "facets" of Eggman would just be different parts of his personality, these are what i had in mind but it's still a WIP:

intelligence (cunning, manipulative, thinks logically and lacks empathy)

childishness (interest in juvenile things like themeparks, acts. well. childish)

vain (self-absorbed, uncooperative, gets upset by criticism, interest in flashy things/theatrics)

emotional (prone to outbursts--typically rage, empathetic)

dramatic (placeholder until i think of a better one because this is just grouped in with vanity tbh)

bad news is that i never drew designs for these. because if im not good at designing characters, im ESPECIALLY not good at designing robots. Rusty Rose was already a challenge. but ill figure it out lol.

ANYWAY now we're done with New Yolk. if this seemed long, don't worry because it was pretty much the only one i did brainstorming on. i have one more design and a few notes but nothing else for the rest of the shatterverses.

~ No Place ~

there's not much about No Place i would change other than the character roster and basic premise. it's still pirate-y, and Dread is DEFINITELY staying the same because i Love him.

pretty much my idea is that instead of there only being one crew which is Dread's, there are two. one with Dread, Amy and Tails, and another crew with Rouge, Shadow and whoever else i think to add. basically they're rival crews that compete to get treasure, and the prism shard is just another one they set their eyes on. Marine is also gonna be there probably on Dread's crew.

Sonic initially takes Dread's side because hes a Knuckles, Knuckles is his friend and Rouge usually means trouble, but when Dread starts being yknow. batshit crazy and manipulative. Sonic realizes that he picked wrong and hes kinda on his own to get that shard.

the only thing i drew for this is a design of Rouge

i imagine Shadow would just be the one pirate design from that Sonic mobile game that everyone likes to draw. his name would also be Blackheart because of the lyrics "black-hearted evil / brave-hearted hero" from I Am... All Of Me

that's all i have for No Place. in truth i didn't make much changes because i actually very much enjoyed No Place (mostly bc of Dread)

~ Boscage ~

so... this one i've done the least thinking about, and honestly it's because i don't really know what to do with this one. something about Boscage rubs me the wrong way, maybe just bc it's a jungle universe and the designs make me cringe a little bit. if anyone has any ideas on this then lmk. i don't think i want to get rid of it entirely but i just don't know how to go about this one.

all i have in terms of notes is that:

it should be a bit similar to Sonic Boom in setting, so an island with dense forests

Sticks should be a character, potentially taking Prim's role in the story

~ Extra Notes ~

more characters in the main cast like Cream and the Chaotix should appear

other characters robot copies should resemble canonical ones like Metal Sonic, Knuckles and Amy, however Nine's robot copies should look Fucked Up to emphasize the Wrongness in how he views his robot copies as true friends

^ this means Chaos Sonic should literally just be Metal Sonic. sorry Chaos Sonic fans i love him too but it made no sense to me that it wouldn't be Metal Sonic but lmk your thoughts on that

that's it for everything i think. i might have had more but i didn't write it down so it has just been forever lost in the dark depths of my brain. this is very unorganized and way too long but i hope it was interesting to read at least. ofc any feedback is welcome. i don't think i'll make any kind of story out of this but i'd like to complete it tbh

#when i say it's incomplete It Is Very Incomplete #it took 3 hours for me to write this post tho #a lot of this is just “well im not sure how this makes sense but this is how i would do it”#feel free to disagree on anything or give advice on how to improve it bc like i said i'm not a writer and i'm welcoming towards criticism #sonic the hedgehog #sth #sonic prime #sonic au #ugh should i even tag characters #maybe do that later #long post #txt #my art #2024 #tw body horror #<- just for that last nine design #and also roboticization ig

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dumbass-tumbler-cryptid · 4 months

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God, I'm sorry for asking about snippets all the time, but they are so good that I can't get them out of my head at all 😅 Could you post a longer fragment, no matter from which chapter?

Lol thank you! Honestly the flashback scenes are way less precious to me since it’s just an expansion on what’s already happened (and I plan on just posting all of them on here at some point) so enjoy the longest flashback I’ve written (so far).

******************************************************************************

Spider’s throat was killing him. He’d spent the majority of the day screaming at Quaritch as he tried and failed to feed him. Thrashed against his restraints and snapped at the man’s hands when he’d attempted to clean smeared food from his face. The effort had exhausted him, his empty stomach growling painfully. But it was worth it to see the frustration in Quaritch’s eyes as he fought to keep the calm facade of a patient parent. After three failed attempts at trying to get Spider to eat, each lasting hours longer than the last, his father had finally given up, leaving Spider in peace.

He stared out his open window, the crisp night breeze caressing his face, the sounds of a forest teeming with life lulling him into a doze. Alone, he could pretend he was on a camping trip with the Sully’s, laying on a blanket between Kiri and Lo’ak, gazing up into an expanse of billions of bright stars. A rare smile graced his face of its own accord as he pictured it, so vividly he could almost hear his friends breathing beside him. “What’cha thinkin’ ‘bout tiger.” Though his voice sounded gentille and incredibly tired, Spider startled his limbs spasming against the restraints.

“Fuck! Can’t you make a noise or something!”

“Sorry kiddo,” Quaritch reached out a hand to cup Spider’s face. Spider tried to maul Quaritch’s hand like an angry guard dog. Quaritch sighed, “you looked so happy there for a second. Made me happy just seein’ y’a smile like that. I was just curious what was goin’ through your head.”

“None of your business! Why are you even here anyway? I thought we were done for the day? Did you sneak in just to stare at me like the fucking creep you are?”

Quaritch hung his tired head, shaking it no, “I have something I wanted to show y’a. I look at it when I’m havin’ a bad day and well…this was a bad day.”

“Wasn’t so great for me either,” Spider said, rattling his chains.

Quaritch ignored him, instead holding up a brown leather book for Spider to see, “This is our family photo album,” Spider’s eyes widened, some of his anger being replaced by the longing he buried deep inside, to see the faces of his biological family. Especially his mother. He instantly wanted to see every last page of the book. But it was in Quaritch’s hold. And he was powerless to look through it himself. “Here,” Quaritch opened it to its first page. Spider looked away. Despite how badly he wanted to see the pictures he would not accept this offering from his tormentor. “These are your grandparents,” Quaritch narrated, “Your mama only had this one picture of her parents. They died when she was young. She bounced around a lot after that.” Spider’s heart bled for his mama. He’d never know how similar their upbringings had been. She was probably watching over him completely devastated.

“These are my folks right here,” Quaritch said, leaning in to try and get Spider to look. “Yeah. My old man there was a mean son of bitch, that’s for sure.”

“Is that where you get it from,” Spider said venomously.

“I’d be a lot nicer if you behaved,” Quaritch shot back, his fatigue getting the better of him. Checking his anger he took a deep breath, moving on, “my mama right here, was the coldest woman you could imagine. I really don’t think she wanted a kid but it was expected of her back then. Drank most days. Yelled a lot. I joined the marines when I turned eighteen and never looked back. I only got these pictures because I was sent their stuff when they finally died. I wanted to throw it all out. But I was seein’ your mama at the time. She convinced me to hold on to at least some of the photos. To not “completely erase them. Even though they were terrible.” That’s what she said.” Out of the corner of his eye Spider could just see the fond little smile on Quaritch’s face as he talked about his late wife, his eyes far away.

Spider squeezed his eyes shut not wanting to see that much love on such a cruel person's face. He heard the rustling of a page being turned. Quaritch continued, a little huff of a chuckle escaping his lips as he took it it, “this was when mama and I started seein’ each other. We couldn’t say we were really datin’. I never took her out or bought her flowers or anything like that. But she’d hang out in my office and take pictures of the two of us when I wasn’t lookin’. I think she did that for blackmail honestly but they’re funny pictures now.” Spider wanted to look, he really did. But he couldn’t. It felt like he’d lose if he did.

“And this here is our wedding picture. The ceremony itself wasn’t much but god did your mama look beautiful…” He wanted to see it. “…This was when we were painting your room. Mama has paint all over her but she’s smilin’ like crazy…” It hurt how bad he wanted to look. “…And this is the day you were born. Happiest day of my life.”

Spider couldn’t stand it. “I don’t want to look at your stupid pictures!” He lied. “Just go away already!” A heavy silence fell between them. For a moment Quaritch just sat there. Spider continued to look away. He heard the soft thud of the book being placed on the bedside table. The creaking of the chair as his father stood from his seat. And then his hands were on him lifting him up into a seated position. Spider groaned, all too used to this now but still incredibly annoyed. “Get the fuck off me!” He screamed and thrashed against his captors' hold, knowing perfectly well by now that it was no use but unwilling to give up fighting. Quaritch sat behind him, wrapping his arms tightly around Spider to restrain him.

“Jesus Miles, calm your ass down already! You're tired. I’m tired. Can’t we just relax and enjoy some family time together.” Spider growled at him. To his surprise Quaritch growled back, holding him even tighter. Something about it made Spider feel small, his struggles momentarily ceasing. His father tucked him under his chin then reached for the photo album, picking up where he left off. “This is the day you were born…”

Spider looked away, closing his eyes tight. Quaritch sighed, bringing his legs up to use as a book stand. He then grabbed Spider by the chin forcing him to turn his head. “Miles…” he said in that now familiar parental tone, “….Open your eyes.”

“Or what? You gonna tape my eyelids open.”

Quaritch sighed, “son what’s the point of keeping up the fight like this? Can’t y’a just let yourself enjoy some time with your old man.”

“Can’t you just get the fuck off me and go away.”

“You know you could benefit from being held more,” Spider snarled, “keep provin’ my point son….”

“Uuuggghhh…what’ll it take to get you to go away!”

“Just look at a few god damn pictures would y’a.” It was Spider’s turn to sigh. It seemed Quaritch’s full proof way of getting Spider to do what he wanted was to dangle the promises of solitude over Spider’s head. And it worked every time. Reluctantly he opened his eyes. There were a few different photographs on the page. His mom holding her little bundle of joy for the first time, her face covered in sweat and looking so incredibly tired and yet her eyes were bright with joy, a large grin of absolute amazement on her lips. Then there was one of his father, his smile more subdued but still, you could see him falling in love with the newborn cradled in his arms. And then there was the picture of all three of them, his mama in bed holding him, his father leaning protective over them both.

Spider said nothing as he took it all in. His father tucked his hair behind his ears then hugged him closer. Spider didn’t make a move to fight him on it, or say a single unkind word, too transfixed by the images of the love he was born into. His father turned the page to dozens of pictures of Spider as a newborn, so small, red and wrinkly. The teens' noses crinkled in disgust, “I was an ugly baby.”

Quaritch shrugged, “everyone is. Babies don’t get cute until around six months. Here….” He flipped forward to show Spider himself at six months old. His father was right. With a little time to grow Spider or “baby Miles” had become an adorable infant, huge sunny smiles in every picture, big curious brown eyes, and the wispy beginnings of platinum blond curls. “….see. You were cute.”

Every picture felt like a punch to the gut but now that he had started he couldn’t stop staring. He just looked so happy. Happier than he could ever remember being, aside from his time with the Sully’s. His parents doted on him in almost every picture looking like they were holding the most precious thing in the world. He guessed to them they were.

After being still for so long his father saw his chance to kiss his son on the temple. Spider felt tears in his eyes but didn’t pull away, slumping further into his fathers hold.

#miles spider socorro #spider socorro #miles quaritch #colonel miles quaritch #cabin in the woods #avatar fanfiction #my fanfic

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destinyc1020 · 6 days

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Sunday confession:

But sometimes I wished Tom and Z dated from 2016 to 2019, and that had been it. I'm aware this is a dark post, and you don't have to entertain this ask if you don't want to. If I had known them, being together could cause so much discourse, obsession, and vitriol as if they were Romeo and Juliet, the irony lol, I wouldn't have hoped as a Tomdaya from 2017. Like for both fandoms, it's too much. I've never been in a fandom where personal life cause so much noise like this. Like Z being asked about kissing her costars because somehow this kinks to Tom is not normal. Her having a film and memes about her and Tom take over is not normal. These are adults, not kids anymore. It also didn't help that they also have films together, such as SM4, where now I'm scared of that presstour cause how are ppl going to act when or if they get engaged. Will that be the whole presstour and not about the characters and film???

It's hard because who can be blamed for this? Is it their publicists for not omitting certain questions from the previous SM3 press tour? Is it the fans or antis whose tweets in praise or disgust get so many likes because ppl are so parasocial about them? Is it them for interacting with those fans, and now, as they are older, they want to have more boundaries, but the cant because ppl are still fixed on how accessible they were in the past? Is it filmbro critics and their biases who pit Timothee and Tom together that also aid fire to Z being used as a punching bag whenever she does a role with a male costars, ppl accues her of being unfaithful to Tom like it is not her job to kiss her costars?

I feel like no other young actors are dealing with this to this extent. Its too specific to them, which is draining cause they are so popular.

Timothee used to, but he stopped interacting with his fans post 2022 due to obsession with his personal life and the armie hammer situation. Also, it helps that he has done a lot of films, supporting and leads, so his works always speak more for himself than he does. Is it overexposure? Is it the consequences of being very moral in an amoral industry?

It's exhausting as a fan. I think what would kill the obsession is castings for both of them because then ppl have fodder to fixate on.

What do you think? Sorry for the long ask😭😭😭

Thanks for your confession Anon. 🥰

Whew! This was a long ask! 😅

I will try not to add too much to the length of this, but anyway...

First off.... right off the bat...

No, I personally wouldn't wish that Tom and Zendaya only dated each other from 2016-2019, because that's not what THEY would have wanted. The heart wants what it wants, and they are obviously blissfully happy and in love with each other. 🥰

I wouldn't wish them anything that they wouldn't want. I think fans forget that when two people want to be together, nothing and NOBODY can keep them apart from each other lol. 😅

With that said, I do find it weird that some fans become sooo parasocial over them.... whether individually, or as a couple. You're right, the constant speculation, obsession, finger-pointing, shipping Z with other costars, the persistent attention on their personal life, etc can get a bit exhausting at times as a fan. 😩😞

With that said, idk what the culprit is. 🤷🏾‍♀️ It's probably a combo of a lot of things honestly?

I just view it as a phase that they will have to ride out together ❤️. They've already done a very marvelous job of handing a very public rlshp with each other in the public eye very beautifully imo, especially with a famous as they are.

When you're in a rlshp with someone, you two are a TEAM.☺️ So I'm sure they will be able to handle whatever bumps come along the way because they've already done a beautiful job so far, and it's probably only made them stronger tbh. 🥰

#confession Sunday

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scoonsalicious · 7 days

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since I can't insert any images while on anon, just imagine me reading this, and in between every paragraph, groaning in disappointment and frustration and then dropping my face against the table. Or maybe just putting my phone down and yelling into my pillow for every bad decision made...which is a lot, to say the least. I'm attacking this by part so I don't miss anything but also fo expect something long hahaha

Well, Bad Decision #1 (unfortunately. I hate that's its just #1. also BRANDON. I'm not saying that name has anything to do with me but I got confused for a second because that's what I've been calling Bucket sometimes so I was like? Bucky? lol), more like Bad Dick #1 ha ha. Anyway. I honestly wasn't surprised that he turned out to be horrendous at that LMAO. I mean, he's young and arrogant and on top of that, disrespectful and disgusting. While I don't condone violence, I mean, with how he was acting, he kinda deserved that dick twist. Was it too much? Probably. I thought so at first then I realized that he's probably done this to other girls before, and most of them didn't have the training Pocket had so it probably had gone worse so that was perfectly fine by me. Also her blurting out a Bucket's name during made me wince because yikes that's always embarrassing but I wasn't surprised. She was imagining him. And ha! you got to insert the "Who the hell is Bucky?" line! I absolutely read that the same way he said it in CA:CW. iconic line. Will probably set that as my ringtone.

But Pocket's last line about feeling disgusted but empowered at the same time and then wondering if that's how Banjo felt, left a little sour taste in my mouth. I mean, I'm no mathematician but 2 wrongs ain't gonna make 1 right. And I can already tell that was a power trip for her where she feels like she's finally in control of her sexuality for once and that she's not the one being used and hurting this time. That can only mean she's going to crave it some more, which, I mean, in the next part it was stated that it had become a routine at this point. The problem is, she's never going to be satisfied. No matter if they look like Bryce, they're never going to be him on so many levels. One: his dick game is supersoldier strong in both skill and size. Two: he took the time to know Pocket and her body pretty well and how to satisfy her needs. Three: well, she loves him. I'd argue sex with someone you love will always feel better than just casual sex (maybe I'm just a sap but anyway) you can't really get all of the above with random strangers. So now, she's always going to crave that power with no real satisfaction in the end.

Now, Sam...he's trying so hard to get through to her and he did make some great points. They are on a mission, there are lives at risk here so it's not only herself she's putting in danger. So her going out randomly and drinking without any communication is so reckless, and dare I say, selfish because who knows what could've happened to her. But she's so far gone now, unfortunately :( She definitely wasn't ready for this mission and she absolutely wasn't in the right headspace for it no matter how much she said she could handle it. I truly did think if Tony knew what happened to her in full, he never would've offered this in the first place. I mean, Bojack tried to stop her and I kinda saw how it was out of concern for her well-being, but, he did come off a little jealous and possessive on top of what he's done so, so that canceled his opinion. Still, I wish someone would've stopped it, but then again, if someone did, we wouldn't have this story haha. Now, the two of them being the ones to look into Hydra again though, I don't know how I feel about it. But then again, they are the ones who know Hydra the most. Still, I don't trust Jeremiah. I still do think she's a spy.

Now with what happened in that room. It's so hard to see all these innocent girls who are just trying to get by on life be taken advantage of. Obviously Pocket meant well, but she did come off as a little all-knowing when she scolded Chloe. Pocket was right of course, an 18-year-old shouldn't be there at all. But she went about it wrong. I also can't blame her because she probably felt so panicked and scared for her and these girls. But now, Pocket taking two lines right off the bat I just...that's one way to hit rock bottom running I supposed. She did it to spare one girl which is great but, at what cost? I could argue that now she's put herself in a vulnerable position where she wouldn't be able to help any of them. It was a good solution at the moment but in the long run? I mean, she couldn't even remember much of what happened while she was intoxicated, so she didn't even really get much information. I mean she said it herself, she's probably jeopardized the mission. But now, she's feeling free from all the pain and anger and hurt, so what happens after that? She'll crave that moment of peace even more. That's how she relapses. She thinks the drugs are going to be a great escape and that could only end so so badly.

I have a feeling where's still on our ride down this hole and we haven't exactly reached rock bottom yet. And I could nothing but watch and be in it for the ride. Amazing as always! Super grateful for you and for giving us three parts today. Sending you love always!

— Jnon 🤍

Dearest Jnon, Do we share a brain from opposite sides of the world?

I shall address your points by point. I'm sorry I named him Brandon-- I should have avoided a 'B' name, but when I wrote it, I had NO IDEA your beautiful trend would have taken such hold, lol. I just chose one of the most generic, boring names I could think of, lol. And it helped her fantasy that his name starts with a 'B,' too. She thinks she's trying to fuck the memory of Bucky out of her, but the truth is, she misses him; she wants it to be him, to go back to a time and place before he hurt her. She's searching for something to make her feel the way he made her feel (I'll come back to this).

I definitely don't condone The Dick Twist. I think it points to just how off the rails she is at the moment, and I wrote it as her having a trauma response to when he grabbed her. Like, she's only concerned about herself right now, and protecting her wellbeing, both physically and emotionally, and at a kind of throw-back moment where she's being manhandled against her will, she experiences a bit of PTSD. Hence, The Dick Twist (TM). One of the things I wanted to make sure I did with Pocket was ensure she wasn't a "perfect" reader insert. I wanted her to be a full fledged, rounded character all on her own, which means making bad choices and doing questionable things. I don't necessarily think Brandon is some kind of sexual predator who does this kind of thing often; I think he was enticed by the idea of guaranteed sex from a hot, older chick, and then got pissed when he realized he was just being used as a substitute for someone else, and he wasn't going to get anything out of it. He reacted the way I'd expect an immature, selfish college boy would react (how I've seen them react, unfortunately). And yes! Absolute intentional throwback to CA:TWS! It's, without a doubt, my favorite line of dialog in the entire story, lol.

She absolutely SHOULD NOT have gone on this mission, you're right. And if Tony had known the extent of her pain, he never would have sent her. If he knew what she was doing, he'd blame himself, profusely. But, her pride, and her false sense of being over her trauma, kept her from telling the one person she trusts implicitly.

Going to her last line, about feeling disgusted with herself and yet empowered, I definitely didn't make this clear enough, but it has less to do with Bucky than it does with the men who abused her throughout her childhood. She's lumped Bucky in with them at this point (because of him denying her consent after he slept with Jade), and she views her actions against Brandon as taking a kind of revenge on every man who hurt her, not just Bucky (I'm sticking with his actual name so as not to cause confusion with actual Brandon, lol). That's why she feels empowered, but she knows it was wrong, which is why she's disgusted. If that wasn't clear, that's my failure as a writer, and for that I'm sorry. Yes, it was definitely a power trip, feeling in control. She barely mentions it in one of the earliest chapters, but she was fairly promiscuous once she escaped her parents, in a way to reclaim sex for herself (and not panic every time she had it), and she's repeating that behavior here. She's reclaiming it after the way she feels Bucky violated her. It's something she's going to keep doing, but without the violence. We're actually not going to see any more of her "conquests," fortunately, but she keeps searching for someone to make her feel the way Bucky made her feel.

So, coming back to that: It's not going to happen for her, exactly for all the reasons you mentioned. The biggest is #3: She loves him. No amount of strange dick is going to compare to that. Like, they weren't just lovers, they were best friends. Her feelings for him are deep. She thinks that, because she was able to basically fuck herself out of her trauma in the past, she can do it again, but it's an entirely new kind of trauma, with such a powerful emotional component, and it's not going to work for her this time.

Her behavior is extremely selfish, definitely, and it's absolutely going to affect the mission, starting with what happened in that room. With Chloe, Pocket saw herself (and I'll spoil a little something-- Chloe isn't 18), and she panicked, wanting to protect this girl from falling into her old life, but it came out condescending, especially without Chloe knowing anything about Pocket's history. It just made Pocket seem cruel, but it was coming from a place of fear.

I confess, writing this chapter was so fucking depressing for me, I wanted it over with as soon as possible, so I did kind of go for making her hit rock bottom right away. I didn't want to keep her in this space for a second longer than I had to. She definitely put herself in a vulnerable position (as the next part will show) and put the entire mission (and something else) in jeopardy due to her actions, and she'll carry that with her for the rest of the fic.

The spiral-down will continue, but I honestly don't detail it. Like I said, it was hurting my heart, so I felt it was enough to show her get there, then just kind of describe how it continues for a bit. I want the best for our girl, and I hated putting her in this position. But she's tough. It sucks, but she needs to go through this so she can actually process the trauma of her childhood. She thought she had, but until now, she's just repressed it.

Thank you, as always, for your insightful thoughts and theories. I love reading your take things! I love you!

#unwanted #jnon report

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thatbitchsimone · 4 months

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re gypsy rose: being center of attention is all she knows. i can't blame her for being attention seeking, because that's her whole damn life. she has always gotten attention from doctors, from people, from news, ever since she was a child. first she was the sick child and now she is the woman who was forced to fake being sick child who killed her mother, she lost the opportunity to normal life and normal behavior long, long ago. i can't blame her for going to the news or talking about herself, how can she know anything else?

thats also a really good point and theres probably at least some truth to that but idk if i agree that shes attention seeking in that way. like i dont personally think she craves fame or whatever i just think shes like… a normal girl i guess. like yeah she got onto social media right away, but tbh she would most likely do that even if she was completely unknown bc most women her age use social media and ofc she would want to participate and post cute instagram photos with her husband and pretty selfies etc bc why not? its what everyone does and shes finally free to take part in normal life.

and the reason shes even doing these press tours is to promote her docuseries which is where she for once gets to speak out fully and tell her story in her own words and be truly heard. she knows her story has been told by others, she knows about The act and the documentaries and how viral her story went while she was away, and now she wants to take her story back and tell it herself which is only fair and id probably do the same if i was her

and yeah she wants to meet taylor swift. well duh what taylor swift fan would not want to meet taylor swift? shes just sharing her dreams. shes always been a dreamer like that, and honestly if she gets the chance to actually meet her fave singer ofc she will take it. anyone would lol.

but anyway, she is used to having the spotlight on her just like u said but i guess rn thats almost a blessing in disguise in a way since that means she kinda knows how to handle it better than most. like id be overwhelmed as fuck in her situation but thats bc ive always been a private normal person who has never been in the public eye but shes sorta.. accustomed to it which is sad bc as we all know she never should have been bc she should never have been in that horrible situation in the first place but at least now that can be an advantage for her during the media hype. shes being smart with it and she wants to use it to help others and be an advocate which i think she will have lots of success in and do lots of good in the future.

i guess what im trying to say is that in my opinion shes not seeking the attention, the attention is already on her and shes just embracing it and making the best of it in order to do something good and to finally have her voice heard for the first time in her life. when u have gone through abuse and have had to keep quiet about it and keep it inside ur whole life ur gonna have that urge to scream it out and let the whole world know whats been done to u and its healing and freeing and empowering to do so when ur finally safe and ready to. she needs to be heard and seen for once and she deserves it bc everyone deserves that. its very human

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hypnotisedfireflies · 7 months

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First, I just want to say how much I absolutely loved The Legend of Charro. It really was a great old style serial western.

Second, I would love to request a little cutting room floor material from Joel and Tess's sweetheart period. I loved the moment with them in the orchard so if you had anything more like that, I would love it. If not I will honestly take anything I love these two so much.

Hello!

Thank you so much for reading and being so supportive of The Legend of Charro throughout. It was really nice to be able to delve into something a little different and I had a lot of fun.

Luckily (or unluckily) all the apple orchard scene did make it into the story. However, I have a sweetheart scene that was cut to share in its place.

The schoolhouse opening scene was originally supposed to take place from Tess’s POV. Then I changed some things around and that flashback had to occur in a Joel chapter instead, so it got reworked. I kept the little bit that I wrote from her perspective – which mirrors what was published but then had a different direction at the end that did not end up occurring in the actual story. It ends abruptly because that’s at the point I realised it wasn’t working, lol. The parts I wanted to accomplish from Tess’s POV were rewritten into the apple orchard scene.

I should also note that the reason I tried to include the cut scene was because it was one of the tier prompts for the BigBang challenge. There’s another scene or two I cut with this very premise. I just couldn’t get it to work anywhere.

The whole town gathered together the day the new schoolhouse was unveiled. It lay a short walk from the town proper, down a little new path and over a rambling brook. Tess’s mother had provided all her own learning and, had she been young enough to go to the school, she probably wouldn’t have been allowed anyway. The ranch they had recently built to be their new home was just too far away – almost a day’s ride from the town – and there was too much work to be done. Book learning was a luxury, and she was already sixteen.

Tess drifted from her mother’s side once the glossy ribbon was cut. She wandered around the big party. It seemed everyone from Black Creek and surrounds had come. She was curious about all her new neighbours. Everything seemed so far away out here. They had only one another on which to depend.

There was a long table for dining and people sat hip to hip on it, filling up on cakes and pies and all the good things to eat that had been made especially for the occasion. Four men in their clean shirts got all together with guitars and violin and started up some cheerful music just made for dancing. Tess liked dancing. She tried to keep still. She didn’t really want to dance out here with all these people watching. Her family was the latest to come. Everyone was just as curious about her as she was about them.

She watched Isobel dancing with Isaac. It looked like he could learn a thing or two from her friend – and maybe so could Tess. Isobel was so light on her feet, her pretty pale pink dress swirling in the sunlight. She always seemed to know what the latest fashions were, and just how to wear them right. Tess tilted her head to one side and tried to follow the dance. She didn’t know the steps but Isobel made them look so easy, easier than they had to be. She floated with an enviable, practiced grace.

“Tess! Papa’s looking for you.” Her brother Nathaniel waved her to follow him. When she looked like she might drag her feet, or not come at all, he sighed and took her by the wrist. “Come on, Tess.”

“What does he want?”

“You not wanderin’ off on your own, for one thing.”

The crowd parted around them and she saw her father talking to the sheriff, an older man with a stunning white moustache and foamy hair beneath his hat. His wife was in warm conversation with Tess’s mother. She turned at once when Tess appeared and gave her a lightning-quick once-over to make sure she was still presentable.

“Thérèse. There you are. Some people here have been waitin’ to make your acquaintance.”

Tess had met the Sheriff Miller and his wife before – their daughter too, who was just a little younger and would probably make good use of that school. But then she noticed two boys standing by the sheriff. They were around her age. They looked like they’d been washed and starched and couldn’t wait to get out there in the dust again.

“Well, don’t you look mighty pretty?” The sheriff smiled down at her. “Are you enjoying the party, young Miss?”

“Yes, sir.”

“These are my boys,” he continued. “You might see them around. They’ll be looking after these parts long after I’m gone. You have any trouble and you can’t come to me, you come talk to my boys, all right? This here’s Thomas.”

“Hello.”

“And this is my eldest, is Joel. Your ma tells me he’s your age, though maybe got most of a year on you.”

Tess opened her mouth to greet him, but there was a great swell of applause as the musicians finished their song. She looked back to the boy as her mother took her by the hand and drew her away.

“Come on, Thérèse. Help me cut up the last of those pies.”

Tess cast one final glance over her shoulder before the crowd closed in. There was just enough time to shoot one another a quick, shy grin. Nobody but them had to know he was already making excuses to pass their ranch at least once a week.

She helped her mother and then, with a willingness that could get her whipped, stole from the party with Isobel the first instance her mother turned her back. They hurried behind the new schoolhouse. Tess could smell the fresh paint as they skulked close to the boards.

There was a little flat, green space between the schoolhouse and the creek and no windows overlooking them.

“This’ll do,” Isobel announced. “It’s real easy, you’ll get it in no time. Put your hands up like this.”

Isobel began to demonstrate, but it was too hard to follow when Isobel insisted on staying in the girl part. Sure, it showed Tess what she was meant to do, but she didn’t know how that connected in with what her partner was doing. Isobel soon lost interest.

“Keep practicin’,” she told Tess. “I’ve gotta be seen.”

“What?”

Isobel lowered her arms and leaned forward, cupping her hand to her mouth. “I got a sweetheart. Well – almost. It’s any day now. I know he’s been itchin’ to ask me to dance all day. You keep practicin’ and I’ll see how you done when I come back, okay? Then maybe when you’re good you come out and I’ll make your acquaintance with his brother, all right? We could be sisters!”

Tess did a few more steps and then stopped, feeling foolish doing this all by herself behind the schoolhouse. She looked up where Isobel had disappeared and turned sharply away, moseying closer to the stream. She kicked at a tussock of grass. Wasn’t much point learning how to dance, anyway. There was always too much to do at the ranch.

“I could teach ya.”

She whirled around to see the sheriff’s boy, the one who liked going past her ranch and looking for her when it was quiet, coming slowly across the green.

“If you want,” he added, taking his hands out of his pockets.

Tess looked up at the building. She could hear the revelry well enough, but nobody else was in sight.

“You been spyin’ on me?”

“No,” he protested, eyes going wide. “No, not that. Just – came down and … I saw you dancin’. And I saw you watchin’ the others. I can show you. Cos I can do the other part,” he hastened to add.

Tess fiddled with her hands in the small of her back. “Well … you shouldn’t be spyin’. But I guess that’s all right. If you want to show me, I mean.”

Joel came forward and offered her his hand. Tess placed stroked his palm lightly with his fingers before she laid her hand on his proper. Joel drew her nearer and cleared his throat. He began the lesson.

#asks

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thebestofoneshots · 6 months

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have you always written for the marauders or did you stumble into it or got inspired or ??? i’m just so curious ☺️

story time with Lils.

I could give a simple answer to this, very short, and all, but I feel like telling the story of how I got into fanfiction so you’ll get a whole textbook instead.

It must have been like 2009 (catch me speaking like an old person), when I was laying in my grandma’s bed, fantasizing about a self insert into Harry Potter (actual Harry Potter mind you I didn’t know the Marauders, nor was my 9 year old self in love with a Sirius yet) and thinking “Gosh wish I could write that… but I can’t because copyright and it’s illegal.”

Fast forward do 2011-2012, THE FACEBOOK ERA, and your girl stumbles into a fanpage that *literally* was all about reader inserts with certain YouTubers I had an unhealthy obsession with at the time. It was then that Lilly discovered ✨the fantastic world of fanfiction✨. And it didn’t stop.

I love reading, but I had always been one to write stories, poems, songs, you name it, I probably wrote it. And so I started writing fanfics as well. First I think it must have been the YouTubers. I also remember reading a Percy Jackson fanfic once, and omg it’s been so long, I don’t even remember the webpage I read it at, but it was like it’s own little blog with its own little colors and stuff, cool shit tbh.

Must have been around 2012 that I started a fanfic of Jack Frost. Yes ladies and gentleman, Jack Frost, he was too cute for 12 y/o Lilly. That one, is absolute cringe if I go back and read it now, but also kinda funny? The reverse harem was so heavy in that one I swear I didn’t even know that was a thing but EVERYONE was inlove with the MC.

Either way, writing longer stories really wasn’t for me back then, so I started writing oneshots. And boy-oh-boy did I love them. I must say “Thank you Bucky Barnes for existing and having me obsess over you.” I must have over 30 one shots written for him. Or more, I have never counted. Some still sitting on my drafts lol.

Then I started writing for Loki and made a small follow along fic of the series, called Time Variant 30578, and I was so proud I finished it (-ish, season 2 just came up and I still have to write for that).

Not that it’s the only thing I’ve finished, I actually wrote a book, it’s a book about a serial-kiIIer, but even if we see his life, the actual unaliving parts are told from the perspective of the victims. Pretty gory, certainly something. But I liked it. That one’s done and sitting in my computer. I still want to find time to edit it and maybe publish it one day, but who knows? Off topic.

Anyway I rewatched SPN and wrote a few shots for one of the loves of my life Dean Winchester. And I have pondered on writing a series for a gender-bend spell type of thing. A short one (but actually short this time, not like GC).

And then, somewhere in between me starting a small business of HP stuff and watching Tick…Tick…Boom! (Which had me obsess over Andrew), and the already smoldering obsession with Ben, I started reading Marauders fics. Discovering the magical world of ✨Poly!Marauders✨

And then I wrote the first part of Gilded Constellations (march this year, probably) and then the second and then the first 12 parts and then I decided to post it and then people showed actual interest?!?! And I kept writing and writing and then I wanted GC to have smut. But I was shit at smut and wanted to practice so The Five Senses was born. After a LOT of research, I kid you not, so much reading fics and even YouTube tutorials lol (on writing guys, that kind of content is NOT allowed on YouTube!). Anyway, writing just solidified my obsession with my boys. And then there was Maraudween, more smut practice but also, I kind of like writing smut at this point? And scary action filled stories??? Right up my ally.

So yeah, in short; I’ve always been a writer, I have always liked Harry Potter and I have been writing fanfics for a while and just recently started writing for the Marauders, but you’re not gonna stop me any time soon.

I like living in my own head, and I love writing stories, and I adore our boys so, you’ll be seeing so much of me you’ll get sick of it lol

Did that answer your question? I feel like one of this teachers that students ask a question to and then tell the entire story of their life. But I feel like I did answer the question.

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unethicalexperiments · 2 months

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can u explain what u mean by band member behavior/being let down by gd? i think i might be out of the loop

of course but i will say this is probably all stuff you already know and none of it is **that** bad comparatively speaking it’s just that i take this very personal lol

with bja first and foremost the reaction he had to his son sexually assaulting a teenage girl when he used to preach feminism and women’s safety back in the day. but being realistic how the fuck are you supposed to react to your son sexually assaulting a teenage girl. what are you supposed to say? i don’t know. but what i do know is his reaction was not the way to handle it with ignoring it entirely and then throwing said son a pandemic wedding and buying him a beach house. and then writing a song called “cunt” with your side project band about the situation. sarah @ scrunchie zine has done such better write ups on this situation than i ever could and i would recommend reading what she wrote not only because she’s a very talented writer but because she was also way more directly involved with that scene than i ever was.

in addition to all this, some of his behavior otherwise has been a little 🧐 to me anyway such as taking tiktok videos with twenty year old girls who do tarot readings for a living or whatever driving around in their car and getting violently angry when people point out he’s had cosmetic surgery LMFAO. none of these things are major offenses it’s just eyebrow raising imo. i’m saying this as someone who has had plastic surgery. you need to be honest about the fact you’ve had cosmetic procedures especially when you’re in an influential position. dying your hair and getting botox is not the end of the world many people in that age range with the disposable income to do so do that stuff. you’re allowed to age how you want just be honest about you know.

as for mike, all of this is me just taking it VERY personally. the absolute passiveness towards the behavior of his wife is inexcusable to me. and yes i know i should not be going hard on her because she is not a member of the band she’s simply a bystander in the orbit but the shit she says is outright disgusting. from the rampant transphobia, the anti vax conspiracies, the covid misinformation and “”doing your own research””, the very obvious body-checking, flashing wealth she didn’t earn, the backwards ass political opinions, at one point she was posting fucking conspiracies about the CERN collider?? like are you serious? anyway. for a woman who survived breast cancer (and i believe a double mastectomy? please correct me if i’m wrong) to talk about medicine and doctors the way she does makes me so violently angry because THOSE PEOPLE SAVED YOU. WITHOUT THEIR HELP WITHOUT THEIR MEDICINE WITHOUT THEIR RESEARCH YOU WOULD BE DEAD. and again i know i’m taking this personally not only because i would have LOVED to receive real treatment when i begged doctors for medical help BUT BECAUSE I WORK IN FUCKING MEDICAL RESEARCH. YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE RESTRICTIONS IN PLACE THE AMOUNT OF OVERSIGHT WE HAVE THE AMOUNT OF EYES ON EVERYTHING THE AMOUNT OF ACTUAL REAL FUCKING RESEARCH WE HAVE TO DO. AS IF THIS BITCH WOULD GET PAST AN INTRO TO RESEARCH METHODS CLASS WITH THE SHIT SHE SHARES ON HER FUCKING INSTAGRAM STORIES. GODDDDDD ok i’m moving on from that. the transphobia is also not something to be taken lightly because again not only are trans women women who deserve to be treated with respect and dignity the same as any other person on this fucking planet but you do know that laws harming trans women directly harm cis women too, right? right?? like your fucking mastectomy that saved your life? anyway i would rather be in a bathroom with any trans woman than his wife. but honestly i am going way too hard on her right now this isn’t about her. its about the passiveness from a man who made his money in a band that supported trans rights, women’s rights, etc to let the person standing by his side behave like this. and again like what the fuck do you do in this situation besides telling your wife to get the fuck off social media. and i’ve seen some people be like “oh cancer treatment is so rough it probably did irreparable damage to her brain” and like yes cancer treatment is rough! no one is denying that! but my aunt did not become a right wing fanatic posting anorexia selfies after her double mastectomy! i looked up to mike sooooo much when i was young not just for what felt like level headedness but also he was the inspiration for me to start playing bass. it hurts. anyway.

as for tre there isn’t much to say here besides more 🤨 behavior with regards to hitting up a woman on instagram in her late 20s while he was in his 40s. is that a world ending age gap? no. is it fucking weird that he’s on wife who is younger than him #3? a little. it’s just Man Behavior. like why can’t you get a woman your own age lol.

anyway! these are my main problems outside of the music itself. i’m sure i’m missing stuff but i really do have to get back to work lmao i may or may not come back to this later.

#asked #green day #sorry 🤷‍♀️

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freakscircus · 8 months

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i forget which cuba stories i've told on here, but i'm reflecting and it really was a wild month. i had so much fun but i was also in fight or flight mode the entire time so i feel like the oddity of some experiences is just sinking in. like in cuba if you get your american dollar changed with the state, you will get about 25 pesos per dollar while on the street you can get close to 200, which is a wild discrepancy. and of course you can't just go up to a stranger and ask unless you are trying to get robbed, so you have to know someone who knows someone.

this is why staying in a casa in cuba is the move.... living with a stranger is weird but not knowing and trusting a cuban while in cuba puts you in a very stressful situation. anyway, my sweet dueña helped me problem solve multiple times while i was there. but of course she didn't speak any english whatsoever (nobody did) so i was very thankful i obsessively and anxiously crammed my spanish toward passable fluency before i left.

so she told me she can help me change money with a neighbor, but he can't do less than $500 because it isn't worth it to him. now mind you, my casa stay for the entire month has already been paid for in american dollars, so i need pesos essentially to just eat and make photocopies. spending money in cuba is more challenging than you think when you aren't doing tourist things and just living and working, so i knew immediately there was no way i could spend the equivalent of that much money in a month. for the record, i spent about $250 usd on a month of food and miscellaneous things like post cards so i'm glad i trusted my instincts because once you change into pesos, you cannot change them back. and obviously once you leave the island they are essentially worthless. so i asked her to negotiate for $300.

at this point i have the equivalent of $20usd that i've spent for about three days of food and i'm running out of money. my dueña is off to try and get pesos and nobody in my non-tourist neighborhood is interested in taking american dollars. i walk everywhere because there is no gasoline and very few modes of transportation so i am burning ridiculous calories all day, so i should probably be eating. by day three of no word from my dueña, i wonder if i'm going to starve to death. its the end of day three and i've been eating calorie dense keto bars and i would murder someone for any kind of unprocessed food for dinner. finally my dueña comes home with almost 55,000 pesos for me, which makes me feel ridiculous because that is about the monthly wage of the average state worker.

my skin was so thick in cuba that i look back and i am amazed. the archives were difficult to understand and the ranks were very closed. i got treated so much worse as a foreign researcher, but i honestly fully understood and empathized with why and in turn did not care. some archive workers loved me, others thought i was so stupid i wasn't worth much effort because i didn't inherently understand the complicated way the cuban archival system worked. i walked two hours a day through habana central (which i fell in love with... i loved passing quinta de los molinos every day) and habana vieja, i ate alone at different restaurants every night with a book which i loved, although i felt like a weird foreigner. nothing at all that anyone did bothered me as long as i got research done. truly tunnel vision. i had a wonderful time, but my resilience and patience (which i do not have in america lol) totally shocked me. i hope i get to go back one day. it is so wonderful... as long as you are very patient.

#also in no way did i ever think i'd starve but it is a bit of a weird experience to just like.. not be able to pay for anything #lots of restaurants in vedado won't take USD #maybe in habana vieja but that was an hour walk away

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livecharliereaction · 11 days

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gonna be a long ahh post

ill try to see if theres anything strange for all of them but i dont remember all alibis n circumstances etc im using the red truths + question arc tip screen oki thats all i have Well i have my liveblogs too but that doesnt seem useful. first ep didnt have red truths yet but im quite sure it had to have been natsuhi or maria so

this was natsuhi + krauss + eva + hideyoshi + rudolf + kyrie

rosas definitely weird in ep2 i very vividly recall her BEING in that chapel too but i could be misremembering that part. though beatrice was there

this whole ordeal was a little strange i wish i remembered who exactly witnessed her bcs i feel like it wasnt just natsuhi n servants... Kyrie definitely saw her yes? I dont know what to make of it. What a cute outfit though shes so cute

also these mentions on shannon n kanon ep2 descs Awh

kanons key or servant involvement seeing as none of the others were first 6

kanon n jessica couldve killed each other Why? Who knows But someone carried kanons body out

"no one is hiding (regarding jessicas room)" STop i wouldve said that too im just like him i cant diss his abilities anymore.

Oh but also "kanon was killed in this room" =/= "kanon was killed in this room at that time" Im thinking about the scene where he "reappears" again i think its been said theres no disguise stuff so maybe

am i confusing the scenes because "theres no corpse" What happened in the doctors room???? when they saw him come back and bury his fingers to that wound i wouldve said he mightve died at that moment but then whats with the corpse. Girl

i miss her so much shes so funny "You are incompetent" in red is crazy

Beato:(.......

rosa had the keys yeahhhhhh i dont exactly remember Why i thought she was weird at the time but it was probably her. She was running around w the rifle too Well thats all for ep2 anyway

wtf even was charumi3 that was evas time to shine yes

Its definitely dead

None of the six committed suicide! hmm the weird linked one i remember it Though. Isnt "The six died instantly" incorrect in kinzos case if he was already dead... Since its a separate statement it doesnt have to refer to those six yes?? So maybe one of them besides kinzo didnt die instantly... Like battler suggested w a chain murder or one person going around to make up the chained rooms

Then theyd have a key too... girl i dont remember what eva was doing at this time also

at that point eva was supposedly in her room w a headache while witch eva was killing them so yeah doesnt look great for eva That servant things still possible too + rosa might as well have killed maria though idk who killed rosa in that case

eva did not kill hideyoshi... servant thing still strong and also wtf was kyrie thinking here anyway might as well blame her n then say eva killed kyrie but i forgor where eva was here again oopsie

"No life forms other than humans have any connection to this game" seems like a witch denying phrase but ok i guess its not a life form then

Lol. Once again kinzo thing makes this not matter... Though there go all my servants dawg maybe that was only for first twilight then

that is worrying. Do you think kanon n shannons names being pseudonyms affects the red truth. "shannon is dead" What if shannon is the idea of her servitude to the family and she threw it away for some reason and that way theres a Sayo who is killing people and doesnt really break the truths "shannon is dead" OR "there are no more than 18 humans on this island" All that goes for kanon too im just pretending that i didnt spoil myself his real name haha. Well kanon even more so since they made him appear and all but that couldve been jessicas delusion too...

she used to have so much fun that beato...

also even if eva was confirmed to not be involved in nanjos death that doesnt negate she couldve done well.everything else heart

thought about "Because of your sin, people die." a lot yesterday... The part about it not being about or with beatrice is of course very confusing and weird But yeah i cant even guess except apparently hes the reason the game exists? Or at least the reason it goes on or more specifically "cause of the eternal torture between us"

I dont understand how it could be about anything else BUT beatrice but ok. Maybe he was mean to maria like ange. But maria was literally 3 years old at that point... I guess he left the family 6 years ago but im having a terrible time trying to understand whats wrong with that really I guess asumu isnt blood related to him afterall but it cant be this great big sin beefing with rudolf u know. Id think his comebacks the reason the cerenomy was seen fit to be carried out (thinking about the amount of people) but angie wouldve normally been there instead of him anyway so the amount of people is the same and its over 14 anyway (13 sacrifices + whoevers imitating the epitaph) so i dont really understand blinks

i like when he goes Ah ngagh nnnghhh aaghh...!!! this vn loves to make people roar also They do it all the time. battler n beato do it the most but eva and many others always roaring too

also??? according to the wiki they didnt use red truth at all in ep3 until this point thats crazy i guess beato really WAS more careful about it

oh ange i miss u

i cant even tell what the first ones about theres no game record in ep4 tips how annoying <- doesnt remember at all what happened. Well ange was there uhh.

nvm its definitely about this one. I seriously remember nothing there was so much ange ange ange it was all eyes on ange.... I might reread my liveblogs

OH YEAH it was ppl supposedly witnessing kinzo killing everyone. Although uh "all ... acknowledged the presence of kinzo" Thats very different from "kinzo was there n killed everyone"... It couldve been in spirit or even if his corpse was there. Also last ones crazy u can just change that well i guess they were counting a corpse then

thats crazy confusing combined with knoxs rule about no accidents... what is left...

STOP. THERE GO BOTH OF MY SUSPECTS STOP IT

none of these negate kanon n rosa culprit yeah?

omfg wtf theres an image limit let me do the rest in another post

#charumi5

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