#it’s the same for the word ‘disabled’

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA (idk if asshole is the right word or more creep idk) for keeping younger friends after high school?

Ok so I (F16) am autistic + struggle socially and my high school has like a unit to support people who are disabled or neurodivergent in some way, I spend most of my breaks and lunchtimes in the classrooms here and have been since I started here, and over that time I’ve made a lot of friends there but the issue is some of them are a few years younger than me

I’ve been friends with most of them for like 3 years now and I don’t think I specifically approached them or anything we just ended up meeting via spending time in the same place at lunch and made friends because we have similar interests/personalities, I didn’t see anything wrong with it but I’m starting to doubt that/I’ve seen people calling it weird (age gap friendships in general, not me specifically)

I have other friends outside of this group who are my age,both in school and who go to different schools, but then the group I mainly spend my lunches with is mostly people younger than me except my best friend S (f15, same year group in school though we just have like a few months apart) - started by me meeting my friend (m15, again same year just a few months) little sister let’s call her P (f14 + in the year group below me) and making pretty good friends with her and her best friend

It’s a British school so you start in y7 (age 11) and leave in y11 (age 16) so I’m leaving in a few months, friend group is me, S, P + her friend who are also in the year below me, 2 who are in year 9 and one who’s in year 8 (she’s 2010 I think and I’m 2008), let’s call her L

I know that sounds really weird and makes me sound like a creep but pretty much all of these I met when I myself was like 13 and they were 11/12, apart from L who started hanging out with P last year and sitting with us which caused me to make friends with her. For most of my time in school I haven’t seen a problem with this because they’re my friends and nothing more (I’ve been in love with someone for like 2 years now and she’s the same age as me soo) but I keep seeing like TikToks of people saying it makes you a pedo for having younger friends and i know it isn’t true but also I’m worried it’s creepy for me to have these friends even if it’s strictly platonic because idk I miss social cues a lot and I don’t know maybe having friends in a younger school year is weird

For the rest of school I’m just treating it as normal because I only have 3 months left, I’ve been friends with most of these mfs since 2021 and I’m not going to start being really distant to them now because that would be mean and they’re my friends who I care about but I feel like when I graduate it’s different and it’ll be weird for me to be friends with them as a college student when some of them will only be like year 9, we have a group chat and stuff but I feel like keeping touch with them would make me come off wrong but also cutting contact with them would be really mean

I’ve been bullied since I was in primary school I’m talking like year 3 and a lot of the people in my year group don’t like me even if I’ve basically never spoken to them (again this makes me come off wrong but it’s bc I’m “emo” aka im not emo I’m just quiet and somewhat alt and because I masked a lot less when we started hs so I was like. Harmless but weird/cringy 11 year old and even though I’ve changed a lot since then people still have that impression of me, i was also outed as bi in year 7 in a school full of homophobic people so there’s that) and so idk I feel like if people already don’t like me they’ll jump at anything to make me seem like I’m a bad person

Tl:dr I’m a 16 year old and my youngest friend is 13 but I feel like once I leave high school it’s no longer socially acceptable to have younger friends and that I’d be a creep to keep in contact, am I right That id be a creep for having young friends or am I just paranoid ?

#aita #am i the asshole

[visceravalentines]

literally cannot get enough of the idea of motel rats randy and benson. fake names and hemming and hawing over how many beds, at first. paying cash and dodging questions about who they are and who they are to each other. investigating each new place for bugs and amenities and sturdy locks on the doors. balancing on the mattress to disable the smoke detector. rooms too hot, rooms too cold. stripping off layers or huddling together for warmth. watching trash TV. ignoring trash TV. gun on the nightstand, smokes on the nightstand. shaking the shit out of the vending machine at the end of the hall. clothes all over the floor. candy wrappers and cigarette butts. showers with shitty pressure and short-lived hot water so they double up, just to be efficient. benson grabs the gun and watches through the curtains when it gets rowdy in the parking lot. randy catches spiders under cups and takes them outside. they take care of each other, protect one another. find hope and happiness amidst a rotating backdrop of bleak and grimy dead-end towns just like home. grow and heal in unexpected ways. they start to think the same way. communicate with fewer words. smoke the same brand. only get one room key. never go anywhere alone. wouldn't be themselves without the other. inseparable, halves of a whole, couldn't be any other way.

#im just so normal about them it's insane #unbelievable even #and i simply refuse to entertain the canon ending <3 couldn't be for me #stockroom syndrome #the passenger #the passenger 2023

[olivers-cocoapuffs]

“plus sized” banging my head against the wall.

#please just say fat 😭 #it’s not a bad word!! #it’s simply an adjective #by not saying it ur contributing to the stigma around it #pushing the idea that being fat is ‘bad’ #it’s the same for the word ‘disabled’ #just say it. #its not a slur

[emilnikos]

I need non autistic people to realise meltdowns are a real debilitating thing that has a serious effect on your mental and physical health NOWWWWW!!! The way its been trivialized and lessened pisses me the fuck off. It's not a tantrum and it doesn't come from "being too weak-willed" it's painful and it's embarrassing AND MOST OF ALL IT'S INVOLUNTARY!! Don't claim to be an ally to autistic or disabled people and then make fun of people who have meltdowns. Literally get the hell out of my sight

#i can't believe i have to day it but autism /is/ a disablity. its disabling. meltdowns are part of that. #'oh this is a lukewarm take' you dumbshit fucks have been throwing the word neurodivergent and meltdown around so #casually they have both been said at me with the same disdain as a swear word. you guys will accept making fun of autistic people #if someone jn your circle who is 'cool' does it first. at your big ages. shut the hell up

[puppyeared]

adhd is when you shoot for the moon but you forgot the rocket fuel and by the time you realize it everyones already on the moon and then you panic and crash into the sun and it explodes

#my meds stopped working and i didnt know thats something that can fucking happen apparently??? #like i knew eventually my body can get used to medicine that the effect kind of dulls but for some reason this time around i thought #that my body just decided to become lazier since the meds were already working anyway. cuz thats the thing as soon as smth is made #easier for me even if its the thing thats supposed to make the disability less disabling i get too relaxed and end up fucking up anyway #so i assumed my fucking cells worked the same way LMAO. they still technically work like i can feel my energy spike when it kicks in #but everything else like focus and memory went down and i thought oh so its just a me problem then. my habits are getting worse #even though ive been doing everything the same like setting reminders checking my schedule. hell ive been setting MORE reminders #to make up for the memory thing and i didnt even realize i just knew i had to compensate since it feels like my memory is getting #worse again. and i only figured this out bc my brother showed me an icecreamsandwich video with him talking about the EXACT FUCKING #THING IM GOING THRU WORD FOR WORD #i have to bring this up with my doctor next week so maybe i have to take different meds. i wonder if this will be a recurring thing #i guess one thing that hasnt changed is that im still slow as hell and stuff only comes to me 5 hours after the fact #its 6 in the morning and i only JUST realized that the word froyo is probably short for frozen yogurt #yapping #adhd

[yardsards]

whoever popularized the obsession with "growth mindset" in education owes every disabled kid an apology letter

#eliot posts #like of course it is important to build confidence in kids and a belief that they can improve #but the whole like #''you MUST believe that you can do ANYTHING and if you bring up any of your limits you just have a Fixed Mindset and are Wrong'' #that's. that breeds so much fucking ableism in teachers #seriously the teachers who cared most abt that mindset shit loooved to pretend my disabilities didn't exist #and shame me when i admitted struggles and acknowledged my limits #it's the same as that ''you're not disabled you're just differently abled :)'' nonsense #i'm fucking disabled! it's not a dirty word! it's not shameful to be unable to do shit or to struggle more to do shit! #ALSO iirc the studies that ''proved'' the effectiveness of mindset interventions in schools were EXTREMELY limited #and didn't stand up well to replication. and overall just suffered from publication bias #*shaking my fist at carol dweck*

[clotpolesonly]

controversial statement but finding nemo has what the dreamer trilogy wishes it had. marlin and nemo could do tdt but declan and matthew could never do fn, i'm just saying.

#and what i mean by this #is that the climax of finding nemo wasn't about marlin finding out that nemo wasn't dead like he thought #it wasn't about finding him it was about mending their relationship #the climax of the story is AFTER they find each other again #when marlin showcases personal growth and demonstrates that he's come to respect his son as a person where he did not before #when he lets go of his destructive overprotective controlling dehumanizing (so to speak) style of parenting #and affords nemo the autonomy to make his own choices and the respect to believe that he can achieve things regardless of his disability #THAT IS WHAT DECLAN & MATTHEW SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN IN GREYWAREN #i feel like they got up to the ''you think you can do these things but you just can't nemo!!'' and ''i hate you.....'' part of the narrativ #and then declan shot up the fairy market and matthew hitchhiked home and they hugged it out and were fine again without another word #l i k e #i'm sorry but finding nemo did not go this hard on the same arc for greywaren to whiff it like that #Declan Lynch #Matthew Lynch #TRC #TDT #tags by me

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

the thing with doctor who i think is that it gets better the more you know. maybe this is true of all writing but i only know doctor who so we'll focus on that. but i think it gets better the more you know this is why my fic is not very good. i dont know many things. i think if you have a background in like, just any field you can use you can make your doctor who stories more interesting. like linguistics maths physics and music are things that come to mind for me that i would like to know to make my doctor who stories more interesting but i think it can work with, like, almost anything. biology stuff also works well adds a lot. sociology stuff history. if you know how to sew really well or youve worked in meat factories. just, if you have deep knowledge about something this will enrich your doctor who stories (again, might be true for literally every writing)

but also things you can know that are just lived and not books. like i said with that post about different countries' doctor whos, every country would bring its own history and values and perspective to the stories. but also like for example the class stuff or the queer stuff you see with rtds stories like anything a writer Knows will make their stories more interesting

and thats why doctor who could literally be so good If They Diversified Their Fucking Staff. in every sense of the word. you need disabled people, trans people, racialised people, people with different religions but you need people who know other things than writing too! which i get is difficult because theyre mostly working in their fields and not writing but like there are writers who are not or have not only ever just been writers. or just get writers with some weird fucking hobbies!

even in the most basic way even if you keep your entire show white christian able-bodied man, if you have more of those you will have better stories. it will still suck! but like, less than if you only have 1 guy writing right? thats not a novel concept artists know this writers know this thats why they work together. and i get that making tv is very complex and theres a lot of interests and a lot of choices being made that arent even to do with the stories but i find it so frustrating to think about how good doctor who could be if they let other people in to put their knowledge and their perspective in the stories

#and not just in the writing but in Every Department Obviously #i just dotn know how television is made so i dont know. like. what those are #the secret good disabled trans decolonialist doctor who that lives in my head man #like you know that feeling when an artist like...........Gets a certain theme or smth #like Knows what to do with it bc they have a certain own experience or knowledge #like when an artist truly fucking knows what theyre doing #you know that feeling? when youre like this SAYS something abt the theme/trope/idea/whatevs #you know? #doctor who is so full of unused potential #i feel like we're spinning our wheels a little bit #and maybe others feel that too bc showrunners keep being like WE NEED NEW SHOCK BIG NEW #but like. youre not gonna get that with the same old perspectives! #for truly new good refreshing you need some new good refreshing people on the mic #anyway. just. frustrates me #10 to the master but it's me to doctor who the show: you could be so much more! #like 13 and 15 are fun right? with the idk new outfit and the rwandan proverb on the sonic. fucks. but #to use rtds own words. ridiculous craven feeble gesture also a little bit. i want like. substantially good stories #i want to feel like the writer knows what theyre talking about you know? #you know that feeling #anyway #you get what im saying #the secret good doctor who that lives in my head man #except. it doesnt live in my head. bc it lives in many otherp eoples head. by definition #but sometimes i read like fic by friends who fucking Know things and im like damn #damn!!!!! doctor who could be so much better!!!!!! #i also think when youre a writer whos only a writer theres the risk of chasing your own tail a bit #in that th elonger youre a writer the more you only start writing about writing bc thats what you Know #i think thats a risk #also not a novel concept pretty sure professional writers are aware of that one gfhkjghgjg theyre not stupid

[bluesey-182]

as someone who doesn't even personally use audiobooks, i will die on the hill that they count as real reading. and i'm willing to kill on this hill too

#i personally think it's super ableist to say it doesn't count as reading #and it's also ableist to say it only counts IF you have a disability that make reading physical books impossible #especially bc the latter opens up the perfect shit storm of forcing people to have to disclose their disability(ies) in order to #not he harassed by assholes #and honestly why do people get some fucking judgemental about how someone consumed a book? #it's the same exact story my guy. same words. same world. same characters. get over yourself #also in case it comes into question: i don't read via audiobooks bc they just don't personally work for me #i have a hard time retaining information that's been given verbally #text post

[assassinregrets]

achievement unlocked: first incredibly unhinged academic email of the semester, sent

#one idiot's journey #first paragraph: do i need to register with the student disabilities office again or do you remember how weird i am. medically #last paragraph: epistemological rambling about whether or not the written word can even be perceived the same by separate consciousnesses

[theygender]

The more I think about it the more I really feel like the recently coined term mesosex might fit me and it's been shared by several intersex education/advocacy blogs I follow now so I know there's support for the term but I'm still like. Scared I would be Intruding™ on intersex issues if I started using it. Like I mean. I'm an afab & (afaik) perisex person with a reproductive disorder that's likely caused by a (non-intersex) hormone imbalance which I'm now essentially having to take feminizing HRT to fix, and as a result I'm now growing tits and undergoing female-pattern fat redistribution at the age of 25 after years of having little to no secondary sex characteristics. I've always identified with intersex issues but now that I'm essentially having to undergo HRT to make my body match my asab that connection to intersex issues feels even stronger. And like that's what the term is for. But my anxiety is still like "but what if you're intruding tho" lol 🙃

#rambling #for the curious the specific disorder is endometriosis and recent research has shown that endo is most likely linked to #estrogen dominance which is where either your body makes too much estrogen OR not enough other hormones (progesterone & testosterone) #and given that the only thing that has helped me at all has been going on full progestin-only treatments #and the fact that everything ive researched about estrogen dominance and low progesterone matches up with my symptoms #it definitely seems like low/no progesterone is the issue for me #(although the docs didnt test my levels beforehand and now i cant get them tested unless i want to go off treatments 🥲) #and like. this progestin treatment has changed my fucking life. legitimately #like it didnt just stop my (pretty severe) endo it also fixed like. all of my physical health issues. stuff i didnt even know was related #dont wanna get off topic talking about my other health issues but. going on progestin has easily been the best health thing to happen to me #but it also feels so fucking weird to be going through the same type of changes that like transfems go through on hrt essentially #as an afab perisex person. its not a bad weird but like its just a strange phenomenon and it would be nice to put words to it i guess? #like im a person who has lived the last 10+ years disabled by a reproductive disorder that prevented my body from developing 'normally' #and now im going through feminizing hrt at the age of 25 to fix my reproductive disorder #thats not exactly like. the normal perisex afab experience lol. but at the same time my specific reproductive disorder and hormone imbalance #dont classify me as intersex (no hyperandrogenism just some mix of too much estrogen/not enough progesterone or testosterone #typical anatomy (afaik) aside from the uterine abnormalities resulting from endometriosis) #and its just. such a weird position to be in. i share a lot of common ground with intersex issues but im not intersex myself #and the whole purpose of mesosex was to create a word for people who arent quite either. 'people who identify with but not as intersex' #and i think that describes me. but also like.... do i count?? 😭 #tmi #request to tag

[bumblebeerror]

Hiii just wanted to say not only are u a cunt ur a stupid cunt for acting like tagging faggot, a slur, as f slur, is terf rhetoric. Trans fems who have been called faggot, queer, or the d slur especially have every right to not want to see those slurs.

Hi person I’ve never talked to or seen in my activity tab before. Did you know you’re on the gay lesbian queer faggot tranny dyke website or are you lost on your way back to Twitter

#frankly I’m perfectly fine if you reblog from me and tag it with the whole word wor blacklisting purposes. #but treating those reclaimed words as slurs - especially WITHIN THE LGBTQIA+ community? #that’s absolutely a terf dogwhistle #also thanks for calling the dude with the learning disability stupid. nice ableism king #that was also in my pinned in the same section <3 #the bell tolls for you #unfortunately

[nonbinarymlm]

I feel like trans people and disabled/chronically ill people and neurodivergent people should be natural allies. Our struggles are so tied together. It's about bodily autonomy, the right to access healthcare, the intense stigma and villainization set against infantilism. The way people make fun of our existence and our activism. We are hand in hand against the social norms of what bodies, identities, and minds "should" look like. And that's just really sexy of us and we should stand together.

#ableism #transphobia #solidarity #trans #transgender #disabled #neurodivergent #sanism #that's a word right #social norms #allyship #shared experiences #have you noticed how many horror movie villains are trans coded and/or disfigured or portrayed as crazy #or multiple at the same time #the way people treat our bodies and sexuality #the way we are infanilised and demonized at the same time #the way ableism is wielded by transphobes and disabled people are degendered/denied autonomy over gender #look all i am saying is that our oppression and liberation is tied together #loving queue

[yellowyarn]

why dosent the American Psychiatric Association make a version of every criteria in the DSM where it sounds like normal English?? people trying to figure out if they have a condition would rather not spend a week trying to decode your fancy medical talk.

#its because they dont care about people who cant pay for a diagnosis #please APA make self diagnosis easier km begging you #ive been reading ur garbage book for like 2 years now and i still have to look up some words and reread the same sentence lime 8 times #dont bully me for casually reading the dsm im normal i swear #/j its the autism #anti psychiatry #psychology #psych survivor #antipsychiatry #antipsych #anti psych #disability #mental disabilities #nuero punk #mad punk #mental illness #antipsychology #psych critical #self diagnosis #american psychiatric association #please degree ppl stop being mean to us plebs #auti punk #autipunk #ableism #nueropunk #sanism #autism #nuerodivergent #nuerodiversity

[that-disabled-princess]

"None of us know how long we have. We don't know what tomorrow holds. And Mjlonir... Mjlonir chose you. And it chose you because you're worthy."

--Thor: Love and Thunder

#the six words that completely broke me and healed my heart at the same time #''it chose you because you're worthy'' #my lil disabled heart needed this #i'm worthy 🥺😭💖 #i'm sobbing #brb gonna go replay this part over and over again and cry #i'm disabled and i'm worthy 😭😭 #marvel #thor love and thunder #disability things

[mossdeep]

mmmhmm yep! a great way to encourage people to read is by calling them stupid! that's awesome!

#i think people like this should have people with intellectual disabilities throw rocks at them #like yeah i'm sooo stupid i have trouble reading! its way easier for me to listen to videos and audio books! #like i get the point they're trying to make but #shouldn't information be widely available in different formats? #so that way everyone has access to quality information?? #its just frustrating. to be disabled #i remember it getting worse the older i got and one day breaking down crying because i couldn't finish the page i was on #it was like a record skipping and playing the same part over and over #because the lines would blend and my eyes couldn't keep track of the words or where i was #yet more often i see people being mean to people for having difficulty reading rather than offering resources