#it was a song magnus would definitely make love to in his club

[butterforbrain]

Do you find yourself walking in a shoe store, the song playing is one you've never heard before, but because you were inspired by, umm, the world! (like the handsomely dressed manriques?), you start to think of your favorite ship.

The singer is practically growling seductively to the party beats.

now it is all in the background while they dive through many /eventually spicy/ plots your mind weaves for them, and you start looking for the right shoes for your child.

You don't have one

#no idea who was singing #huge loss #it was a song magnus would definitely make love to in his club #Alexander lightwood deserves to be pegged to that song #wish I can remember any words #just a thing #magnus bane #headcanon #they make life bearable #otp

[rosy-cheekx]

for the kiss prompts... 16 with jonmartin?

Combined this New Years Kiss prompt with @ombreblossom‘s prompt for “a giggly kiss" and an anon prompt: “I wish you would write a fic where martin scoops Jon into his arms and Jon realizes how strong he is” damn if i dont deliver

Just a good vibes fic while I’m dying over the pre-finals stress. Check on your friendly neighborhood psychology students, especially juniors. They’re a-struggling. 

Enjoy!!

Resolutions, 2.2k

CW: alcohol

--

“Happy New Year’s Eve!”

Jon wasn’t sure what he expected of Tim’s house. Maybe something haphazardly designed, with takeaway menus pinned to the fridge? Maybe the epitome of the bachelor pad?

He definitely hadn’t expected the open floorplan, spotlessly cleaned and well-organized, with furniture complementary to the walls and each other. Warm light spilled from every lamp, with purple and silver decorations inscribed with “2015” and “Happy New Years” dangling from almost every surface.

“You can close your mouth now, buddy,” Tim elbowed him lightly. “I keep my spaces clean, what can I say?”

Jon clamped his teeth back together and held out a bottle of white wine mechanically. “I brought this. Er, sorry I’m late.”

Tim shook his head jovially, taking Jon’s coat and scarf along with the wine, before handing the bottle back to him. “Party’s just getting started. We’ve been drinking a bit, playing some games.” He winked before nudging him toward the couches, where Sasha’s dark curls were just visible. “Go on, I’ll be right behind. They’ll be happy to see you!”

“Jon!” The man in question jumped and craned his neck to see Martin—or, more rightly, his hand—from over the edge of the couch cushions. “Good, you’re here! Sash and Tim are kicking my ass in Scrabble.”

Jon approached the living room, spying Martin, sitting on the floor in front of a coffee table, another bottle of white wine between him and Sasha, along with the aforementioned Scrabble board. “Scrabble isn’t a team sport?”

“Hey, Jon. Ooh, more wine, thank god, this one’s just gone.” Sasha scrunched her nose with her greeting, reaching for the bottle in his hands. “And no, it’s not,” she continued as she spun a corkscrew between her fingers. “But Tim is missing like half the tiles so we can’t play four.”

“Tim’n’Sash ganged up on me,” Martin mumbled, the edges of his words softened, Jon assumed, by wine. “I didn’t even—I’m new to research, issnot fair.”

Sasha pulled the cork from the wine as Tim leapt over the cushion of the suede couch, landing neatly next to her. “I told you, you would get Jon when he showed up, which evens it out anyways. Stop pouting.”

“Am not.”

Jon folded his legs beneath his hips as he sat, examining the board and taking a proffered glass from Sasha’s hands. “Don’t worry, Martin,” he offered, smiling gently at the man, taking in the flush of his face and the rolled sleeves of his dress shirt—maroon, he filed away. Looks good with his hair. “We’ve just got to last long enough before Tim gets drunk or bored and starts to throw letters at us. Did he tell you that’s why they’re missing?”

Martin laughed aloud and the noise caught Jon off guard. It was a low, warm sound, loud in a way that suited the man. Jon smiled to himself, proud.

“I do-I do not,” spluttered Tim, pointedly ignoring Sasha’s raised eyebrow. “…I stopped that when we were down to one W.”

Jon nudged Martin, gesturing for the block of letters in front of him. “You’ll see. Our turn?”

--

Eight rounds, three glasses of wine, and a dodge from the letter E later, Jon was feeling properly comfortable. They were all properly buzzed, if not a little tipsy, and the clock ticked steadily closer to midnight. Martin and Jon had continued to be partners for all the other games they played: Charades, Pictionary, and a silly game Sasha had made up where they had to describe concepts like colors or sounds, without using words directly related to them. Martin had carried their team for that game, explaining through an embarrassed blush that he liked to read a lot of poetry. Jon elected to ignore that statement, though he was grateful for the edge it gave them; his competitive streak was willing to ignore a multitude of sins.

At 11:15, Tim flipped through the television programs, searching for one doing a proper countdown. One of the BBC Music channels was playing a Countdown playlist, with an eclectic variety of music on the playlist if the presented queue was any indication. Remote in hand, Tim spun on his heel, lip-syncing voraciously to the song, some dreadfully cheesy rock ballad. In turn, he focused on Sasha, then Jon, then Martin, hand outstretched to each of them in a mockery of longing. When he turned his attention back to Sasha, the chorus swelled and she took his hand, swinging herself under his arm with a grin on her face. Jon settled into the couch cushions, a warmth running through his chest as he watched the two spin with each other in a pseudo-dance. Martin sipped his glass of water on the other end of the couch, seemingly as happy as Jon to just watch.

As the song ended, the rock ballad was replaced by a pop song, one Jon didn’t know but it was apparent everyone else did. Tim sang along in a horrendous shout-sing, and Sasha grabbed Martin’s hand, tugging on it lightly. Martin rolled his eyes, resisting briefly as Sasha wordlessly argued with him, but her will was stronger and he laughed softly as she pulled him to his feet and jumped around to the beat, air-guitaring in circles around him. Eventually, Martin closed his eyes and leant into the dance, reminding Jon vaguely of his club days with Georgie, the dozens of hot, sweaty young adults without a care in the world of who saw them dance. And, most importantly, dance badly. Martin was truly terrible, but Jon was unable to tear his gaze away. He wasn’t matching the tempo and he knew about half the words as he joined Tim in singing the chorus, but there was something about him that was absolutely intoxicating, more than the wine Jon had consumed.

The Beatles played next, and of course Jon knew them. They had been his grandmother’s favorite, and for good reason. He hadn’t even realized he was singing under his breath to Come Together until Tim’s TV remote was shoved under his lips unceremoniously. Without thinking, he accepted the faux-microphone and joined the trio, standing from the couch to the coffee table in socked feet. As he sang, voice growing in intensity, he swung his arms wide, the images of clubs and dancers and stages at the forefront of his mind.

When the song ended, Jon was breathless, and the smattered applause from his friends brought him out of his reverie. He blushed, suddenly acutely aware of the blood rushing through his body and the heart that was pumping it. he handed the remote to Tim and moved to step off the table, chewing on his lip as he did so. Before he could make the awkward step to the floor below, he yelped as he was suddenly swept off balance. The spinning of his mind, thanks to the alcohol, confused him briefly before he realized he hadn’t fallen and was actually being clutched in a pair of strong arms, bridal-style. Martin’s arms, to be precise. His brow was furrowed in concentration, though he held Jon like he weighed almost nothing.

“Ah, you said you didn’t want to fall.” Martin shrugged and bounced Jon in his arms slightly as if that explained everything.

He had? “Mmm-thank you Mar’n,” Jon murmured, eyes unsure where to land and deciding on a loose curl that hung over Martin’s forehead. He wanted to pull it, Jon realized, and he did so, gently, giving the coil a tug, and giggled to himself as it sprang back in place. Martin was a lot stronger than Jon gave him credit for, and warmer too, though that may have been the alcohol. It was nice, being held like that, and Jon felt himself nestle towards the heat of Martin’s barreled chest without thinking about it.

Tim and Sasha, to Jon’s relief, hadn’t seemed to notice, deep in conversation. Martin deposited Jon safely on the couch and slumped next to him, unbuttoning his collar a little more and turning his attention quite intently to his phone.

The music carried on, and Jon was pulled into a few more dances with Sasha and Tim but felt himself gravitating towards Martin as the hour pursued, making excuses to scoot closer on the couch. A few videos of kittens later, he was properly next to him, watching Tim and Sasha tango to Britney Spears and the clock that ticked steadily towards midnight.

As 11:50 hit, Tim lowered the volume and flopped next to Jon, sweat beading on his forehead. “Alright, mates, resolutions for 2015, go.” He popped a grape from the platter that rested on the chair nearby. “Mine’s to get outside more, I haven’t been able to get out of London much. Maybe go backpacking, see the world.”

Sasha shrugged and perched on the armrest of the couch, feet resting on the cushion next to Tim. “Patience, I think. Listening to people better.”

Jon surprised himself by speaking. “Work-life balance,” he mumbled, dragging his eyes from the coffee table to meet Tim’s curious expression. “It’s not like Elias cares much what the researchers do.”

“Hell yeah, mate!” Tim clapped him on the back. “Maybe you’ll finally come dancing with me. You’ve clearly got the skills.” He turned his attention to the final member of their party. “Marto? What about you?”

Martin shrugged, lips pursed in thought. “Mm, be more honest with people, I think.”

Tim nodded excitedly. “Oh yes, I would love to see Martin Blackwood, The Director’s Cut.”

The ginger shrugged. “I don’t think you’re missing much, honestly, just maybe a little more negativity, a little more feeling.”

“Regardless,” Tim waved the thought away. “Can’t wait to see it.” He cast his eyes to the ceiling and crossed his arms under his chest. “What do you think the illustrious Elias Bouchard does on holiday? I swear that man lives and breathes Magnus Institute.”

Sasha grinned. “Bet he wears nothing but a silk robe, with the Magnus owl embroidered on the chest, skulking around the house and drinking scotch, grumbling about budgets and paranormal stories.”

“Bet he has a cat he strokes menacingly while watching the stock market,” Martin added, sighing. “We can agree he’s a total Tory, right?”

“Oh, for sure,” came a chorus of affirmation.

The group sat in comfortable silence as an upbeat love song played on the television. Jon’s eyes were starting to feel heavy, like how they felt when he got them dilated at the optometrist. Midnight couldn’t come soon enough.

“Hey, guys?” The voice from his right was quiet, hesitant. Martin’s eyes were glassy, phone abandoned on his lap. “I’m really happy to be here, with you all.”

“Martin!” Sasha and Tim cooed happily, rushing to coat his words in affirmations and gentle kindness, sweet gifts with which to end the year. Jon opted for a quieter approach, not the verbally affectionate kind of man, placing a hand over Martin’s gently, squeezing his wrist once. He wasn’t even sure if Martin noticed it—he didn’t move his hand before Tim was shouting, hauling them up as 11:59 flashed on the screen and a countdown began to shout its way from 59 on the screen.

“Come on!” Tim crowed. “My mum always said you can’t stand still when midnight hits, or it’s bad luck. Something about starting the year moving.” Tim led them all in a sort of march, stomping forward and back, spinning in circles, and swinging each of his friends under his arms, though Martin had to duck rather considerably. All four of the research staff members were laughing through their words as they tried to add their discordant shouting to the last few numbers on the TV.

“Three! Two! One! Happy New Year!” Tim grabbed Sasha around her waist and dipped her low as he kissed her, both grinning into the kiss. Jon chuckled and shook his head at the pair, before feeling the hand that was still on his tug gently.

“I-I said I wanted to be more honest,” Martin murmured, voice low in his throat. Jon nodded wordlessly, indicating for him to go on. His words seemed caught somehow.

“If I’m honest,” Martin continued, eyes flitting over Jon’s face before landing back on his eyes. “I really want to kiss you.”

Jon giggled, actually giggled at Martin’s words, the boldness of the wine piloting his voice for a moment. “What are you waiting for?”

So Martin did, one hand on Jon’s waist and one tangled in the hair behind his ears, pressing Jon close and up towards his lips. It was a warm kiss, soft and gentle, and Jon’s head was spinning, not from the buzz or the dancing but from the four points of contact he had with MartinMartinMartin Blackwood is kissing me and Martin’s hand is on my waist and my hand is on Martin’s cheek and his skin is so soft I think I could kiss him forever. Screw 2015; I’ll come back for 2016 and just kiss Martin for a year—

Martin pulled away, smiling down at Jon with a look of utter adoration. “Happy New Year,” he breathed. “Here’s to 2015.”

“H-Happy New Year,” Jon returned, ducking his head shyly at the gaze Martin was casting on him. “Let’s hope it’s a good one.”

#tma #tma fanfic #jmart #timsasha #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #sasha james #tim stoker #jonmartin #the magnus archives #the magnus archives fanfic #fanfic to a tea #cw alcohol #new years eve #new years eve party

[rhosyn-du]

Never make a mess when a total catastrophe will do - Chapter Four

Pairings: Jimon, past Clace, background Clizzy, a bunch of other minor background pairings Rating: Explicit Art: @cor321​ Beta: @all-thestories-aretrue​ Tags:  Alternate Universe - College/University, fake dating, oh my god they were roommates, friends with benefits, idiots to lovers, pining, miscommunication, holidays, drinking games, mistletoe, symbolically significant Oreos, domestic fluff, brief mention of past character death, Jace’s self-worth issues deserve their own tag Summary: What do you do when you find out your sister is not only dating your ex and love-of-your-high-school-life but is also bringing her home for Christmas? Bring your annoying, hot, annoyingly-hot roommate as your fake boyfriend to show them you're totally fine with it, obviously! There's no possible way this could backfire. Link: AO3 , Tumblr Master Post

Chapter Four

Clary, it turned out, was very good at Land Mines. But so was Izzy. It only took a couple rounds for them to admit they played the game all the time, and a couple more rounds (both of which the Lightwoods lost) for Izzy to drunkenly (and loudly) explain that she thought it was hot when Clary got competitive.

Jace told her he didn’t want to hear about it, and he hoped he wasn’t tipsy enough for her to notice what a hypocrite he was in saying it. Because competitive Simon? Was so hot. And Simon was pretty much hot all the time, even when he was annoying the hell out of Jace, but Simon going all-out trying to prove himself, and doing it every damned time, was something else. It didn’t help that right now he was doing it dressed in a tighter than usual t-shirt that proclaimed him a “Jedi in the streets, Sith in the sheets” that Clary (who most definitely noticed Jace’s appreciation of how tight the shirt was) gleefully informed Jace had been a present from her.

“Another win for Team Fray-Lewis,” Simon proclaimed as his coin spun to a stop without touching any of the glasses on the table. He and Clary bumped fists without even looking at each other, and Simon flashed Jace a smug grin that did things to him. “Let’s see you top that, hotshot.”

Jace returned a cocky grin of his own. “You should know better by now than to question my skills.”

Thankfully for Jace’s ego, and his liver, his own spin came tumbling to rest right before hitting a double-size shot glass of tequila. The same shot glass Clary’s coin hit moments later.

Clary winced. “Sorry, Si.”

“All right,” Simon said, narrowing his eyes. “All right.” He downed his shot and licked the excess from his lips in a way that Jace found very distracting. If he didn’t know better, he’d think Simon was doing it on purpose. “We’ve still got this.”

“Damn right we do,” Clary agreed, knocking back her own shot and then grabbing Izzy for a messy kiss. “A kiss for luck,” she announced.

“I’m not even on your team, silly,” Izzy giggled.

By the time they finished the game, Jace and Izzy having only just squeaked by with a win, the party was in full swing, and Jace was feeling pleasantly buzzed. With several hours left to go until midnight, he decided to pass on the cocktail Magnus offered him in favor of plain soda. As much as he’d joked about hangovers, that was the last way he wanted to start the new year, especially since he had plans with Alec and Magnus the next day, and they both seemed to be somehow magically immune to hangovers.

Jace let himself get swept up in the atmosphere of the party: dancing, joking with his siblings, getting into an inane argument with Magnus’s friend Ragnor about which of Scott Joplin’s works was most influential. And somehow, he always managed to find himself back by Simon’s side. He should have been doing it as part of keeping up the appearance of being his boyfriend, but it was less that he was intentionally trying to spend time around Simon and more that he was allowing himself not to not be around Simon. The realization should have annoyed him, but somehow it didn’t.

Especially since Simon seemed just as drawn to his side. Which was probably Simon keeping up appearances, since he’d proven himself to be incredibly good at it so far. It was almost comfortable. Right up until it was something else entirely.

Jace and Simon had been chatting with Dot—a friend of Magnus’s who’d apparently been a neighbor of Clary’s and Simon’s when they were kids—when Clary, who had clearly not stopped drinking after their game, interrupted by throwing her arms over Jace and Dot’s shoulders. “You guys should come dance with me,” she told them. “Izzy’s busy talking to Magnus about shoes, and I wanna dance, and you guys are like three of my very favorite people who aren’t Izzy, so I want you to dance with me.”

“Of course,” Dot laughed, wrapping an arm around Clary’s waist and twirling her toward the makeshift dance floor Magnus and Alec had made in their living room.

“You guys, come on!” Clary called over her shoulder, tripping and nearly falling before Dot caught her and turned it into a shaky dip.

Simon looked at Jace and offered his hand. “There’s really no point in arguing. She’s even more stubborn drunk than she is sober.”

“That’s a terrifying thought,” Jace said, taking Simon’s hand and following him onto the dance floor.

Jace lost track of how long they spent dancing, first with Clary and Dot, switching partners every few minutes at Clary’s enthusiastic insistence, and then just with each other after Izzy reappeared and Clary abandoned them to go cling to her girlfriend like some kind of hyper-affectionate koala.

“I honestly can’t believe she’s still standing,” Simon said. “She’s had at least three margaritas since we finished our game, and I didn’t even want to think about drinking after that many shots.”

“She was probably consoling herself after you guys lost so badly,” Jace said, moving closer than the music or space strictly demanded. “I wouldn’t know what it’s like, but losing sure seems like it would suck.”

“Uh huh,” Simon said. “Because you winning by a single shot was so very impressive.”

“It really was,” Jace agreed.

The music made a surprisingly smooth transition from pounding bass to Duke Ellington, and Simon grabbed Jace’s hand to pull him into some kind of swing dance that Jace was not at all familiar with.

“Really?” Simon asked with obvious relish. “You don’t know how to Lindy Hop?”

“I’m not an old man or terminally nerdy, so no,” Jace answered, not quite managing to follow Simon’s steps, but not making a complete fool out of himself either. He supposed that was one good thing to come out of that ridiculous mandatory high school PE swing dance unit.

“So, are you calling Magnus old or a nerd?” Simon asked, nodding to the other side of the dance floor, where Magnus was twirling Dot like they were both professional dancers.

“Magnus is a special case,” Jace said.

“Because your brother would murder you in your sleep for saying anything bad about him?” Simon suggested.

Jace snorted a laugh. “I plead the fifth.”

“You know what I think?” Simon asked, doing a rock-step then smoothly maneuvering Jace into a gentle twirl.

“I’m sure you’re going to tell me,” Jace said.

“I think you just don’t know how to deal with not being good at something. So you’re an ass about anything you aren’t good at.”

“Nah,” Jace said, attempting to mimic Simon’s earlier move and managing to awkwardly spin him into a twirl of his own. “You just always react so well when I’m an ass to you that I can’t resist doing it.”

“Ah, got it. So you’re basically saying you never matured past middle school.”

“You’re one to talk about maturity. Do I need to remind you that the first thing you did when I introduced you to my sister was ask to see her Lego collection?”

“In my defense,” Simon said, “I was trying to save us all from probable food poisoning.” He executed another twirl, this time one that ended with his arms wrapped around Jace from behind, which Jace definitely felt no way at all about. “Also, it was a really great Lego collection.”

The music changed again, back to a modern club beat, and Jace felt some of the tension leave his body. This was the kind of music he knew how to dance to. And maybe there was just the tiniest bit of truth to what Simon had said about him not knowing how to be bad at things.

It was just natural and not at all pettiness over Simon being right that had him rolling his hips with the beat of the new song, which just consequently happened to grind his ass back against Simon’s crotch. And, okay, there was maybe just the tiniest bit of satisfaction in hearing Simon’s sharp intake of breath.

“Just try not to do that when someone you’re actually dating brings you home for the first time.”

Jace wasn’t entirely sure how to identify what he felt when Simon leaned forward to speak directly in his ear. “And what do you think I should have done?” Simon’s breath was hot against his skin. “If we were actually dating?”

Jace spun around to face him. “If we were actually dating, Alec would have been on his own defending dinner from Izzy, because I wouldn’t have taken you back downstairs until I was done very thoroughly showing you my bedroom.”

It came out sounding much less like a joke than he intended, the truth behind his words bleeding through his shaky bravado. And he knew Simon heard it, could see it in the soft surprise of his parted lips, could feel it in the faint tremor of the hand he still held.

“I guess,” Simon said, tongue darting out to wet his lips, drawing Jace’s eyes, “it’s a good thing for our digestive systems that we weren’t actually dating.”

This had been a mistake. Dancing with Simon like this, touching him like this. Inviting him to the party in the first place. This whole damned fake dating plan. Jace wanted desperately to lean in and trace the path of Simon’s tongue with his own.

“I don’t know,” he said instead. “I think it probably would have been worth it.”

They weren’t even pretending to dance now, Simon standing stock still, watching him as if trying to puzzle him out. Finally, he took a step back, loosening his hold. “Jace—”

“Attention, dearest friends and tolerated acquaintances!” Magnus’s voice rang through the loft as the music came to a sudden halt. Jace stayed as he was, unwilling to bring himself to let go of Simon entirely, unable to look away, and Simon seemingly similarly caught.

“We have invited you here this evening to help us ring in the new year, which, if you direct your attention to the clock right over there, you will see is now a mere thirty seconds away. So, grab your drink, grab your sweetie—or an attractive stranger, I won’t judge—and get ready to count down to a brand new year!”

Jace barely noticed as the countdown began around him, focused as he was on Simon. He only really caught on to what was happening when Simon’s lips began to move, softly counting down with the crowd even as his eyes never left Jace’s.

Jace had plenty of time to think through what he was about to do, with enough left over to second- and third-guess himself. Some people might have said thirty seconds wasn’t long enough to make a reasoned choice, but for someone like Jace, who made an art out of making impulsive, split-second decisions, thirty seconds was practically an eternity. He watched Simon’s lips form the final count of “one,” heard the crowd around them erupt into shouts of “Happy New Year!” and then he was surging forward.

Simon met him halfway, the kiss bruising and desperate. Jace was dimly aware of people around him laughing and cheering, but his entire world was narrowed down to this one moment, to this kiss. If their previous kisses had been chaste and family-appropriate, this was anything but. Simon kissed like he wanted to crawl inside Jace, one hand on the small of his back, pulling him close, the other tangled in his hair. Jace kind of wanted Simon to crawl inside him.

When Simon finally broke the kiss, Jace had to hold himself back from chasing his swollen, spit-slick lips. But whatever Simon saw when he looked at Jace had him muttering a soft “shit” before diving back in for more, so Jace considered it an all-around win.

Jace licked into Simon’s mouth, sliding the fingers of one hand under the hem of his shirt enough to trace along the waistband of his jeans, just above his hip. Simon shuddered and made a soft, desperate sound, and Jace made it his mission to elicit more of those sounds, to drive Simon just as crazy as those sounds were driving him.

When they broke the kiss for the second time, it was prompted by a sharp whistle that Jace would have recognized anywhere as Izzy’s followed by a cheer of, “Yeah, get it, Simon!” from Clary.

Simon looked slightly embarrassed at just how carried away they’d managed to get in the middle of a party, but Jace just smirked and threw a wink at his sister and her girlfriend.

A quick look around showed that, despite Izzy and Clary’s very loud attention, most of the partygoers were too involved in their own celebrations to be paying much attention to Jace and Simon, although it also seemed like the rest of them had long since finished up their celebratory kisses. The only other people paying them any attention at all were Magnus and Alec, who were standing nearby.

Alec wore the look of long-suffering fondness he often wore around Jace. “Please don’t have sex in my living room,” he said when he caught Jace’s eye.

“We weren’t—” Simon spluttered. “We wouldn’t—”

“At least use the guest room like civilized people,” Magnus added. Much less fondly, Jace thought.

“Oh god,” Simon muttered as Magnus swept off to speak with other guests, Alec in tow. “I’m never going to live this down. Fray is going to be teasing me about this until the day I die. And I think your brother hates me now.”

“Alec doesn’t hate you,” Jace said. “You would know if Alec hated you; he is not subtle. I’m sure he considers this one-hundred percent my fault.”

“Okay, but Magnus definitely hates me.”

“Dude,” Jace said, squeezing Simon’s shoulder, “Magnus doesn’t hate you, either. He wouldn’t have offered us his guest room if he hated you.”

Simon gave him a flat look. “Pretty sure he didn’t actually intend for us to use the guest room. We’d have to have basically no shame to just ditch the party and run off to the guest room to have sex after Clary and Izzy drew so much attention to us making out like horny teenagers in public.”

“You’ve known me how long, and you still operate under the misapprehension that I’m capable of shame?” Jace teased.

Except. Except he was only half-teasing, because he would absolutely ditch this party to go have sex with Simon in the guest room if he thought Simon was even a little bit interested in that. Hell, he’d ditch the party to have sex with Simon in the fucking closet.

And he was pretty sure Simon knew it, because Simon was staring at him again, with that same intensity he had right before they’d kissed. Jace smirked and very deliberately ran a tongue over his lower lip.

“I hate you,” Simon said without heat before dragging Jace into a quick, filthy kiss. “Where’s the guest room?”

Jace didn’t answer, just grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the hallway that led to the guest suite.

It took them several minutes to actually make it into the guest room because Jace decided halfway there that he kind of desperately needed to be kissing Simon again. It was like a dam had broken, and now that he was allowed to kiss Simon, really kiss him, he couldn’t seem to stop. But that was okay, because Simon didn’t seem interested in stopping, either.

When they finally stumbled into the guest room, Jace found himself promptly pinned against the door, Simon’s body pressing against him in a long, hard line, a situation which Jace found himself more than okay with.

“This,” Simon muttered between kisses, “is probably a terrible idea.”

“Yeah,” Jace agreed, sliding one leg between Simon’s leg to press against the bulge in his jeans and trying to ignore the bitter twist in his gut. “You want to stop?”

“Fuck,” Simon panted, grinding against Jace’s leg. “Really no.” He slid his hands beneath Jace’s shirt, pushing it up in a clear indication he wanted it off. “Just making sure we’re both on the same page with regard to our mutual terrible decision making.”

“You know me,” Jace said, raising his arms obligingly and helping Simon tug his shirt over his head. “Making terrible decisions with pretty people is kind of my thing.”

Jace’s shirt fell to the floor, and Simon just sort of froze for a second before reaching out and sliding his hands up Jace’s chest almost reverently. “God,” he muttered, “you are just unfairly hot.” His hands stilled suddenly, and he met Jace’s eyes, brows furrowed. “You think I’m pretty?”

“Yes, dumbass,” Jace said, reaching up to cup Simon’s face. “Did the last ten minutes not clue you in?”

“I—”

Jace silenced whatever Simon was about to say with another kiss. With as much as he was feeling right now, kissing was safer than talking. He’d probably said too much already.

He flipped them around so he was pressing Simon into the door, breaking the kiss just long enough to say, “Oh, hey, I found an effective way to make you stop talking. Should have thought of this sooner.”

“Fuck you,” Simon mumbled against his mouth.

“Maybe later,” Jace told him, tugging at Simon’s belt. “Right now I just need to get my hands on you.”

“Yeah,” Simon agreed dazedly as Jace worked open his jeans. “Yeah, okay, that sounds really—” He broke off with an almost wounded noise as Jace reached inside his boxers and wrapped a hand around his cock.

Jace kissed him again, slow and deliberate just like the hand on Simon’s cock. Jace felt back on firmer ground, now. This, sex, was something he understood, something he was good at. Slick tongues and writhing bodies were far more straightforward—far less dangerous—than feelings.

For a few strokes, Simon seemed content to just take what Jace was giving him, but then he was kissing back with almost bruising intensity and fumbling open Jace’s pants to wrap a calloused hand around his dick, and it was everything.

Jace lost track of things at that point, lost in the feel of Simon’s deft fingers around his cock, of Simon thrusting into his hand, of Simon’s mouth on his own, of Simon. And then Simon was murmuring something unintelligible against Jace’s mouth as the movement of his hips became erratic and then he was shaking apart in Jace’s arms, coming all over his hand and abdomen, and Jace thought, as he followed Simon over the edge seconds later, it might have been the hottest thing he’d ever experienced.

“Holy shit,” Simon said after they’d both caught their breath. “That actually just happened.”

Jace let out a soft huff of laughter. “You noticed, huh?” He stepped back just enough that he could see Simon’s face and was dismayed at the wariness he found there.

“I guess,” Simon said, “I should probably get cleaned up and, like. Go?”

There was a pit forming in Jace’s stomach, and he hated it.

“Alternate plan,” he offered with far more assurance than he felt. “We both get cleaned up, and then we find out how nice the sheets are on Alec and Magnus’s guest bed. I was planning to sleep here tonight anyway.” Whatever this was, Jace wasn’t ready for it to end yet.

“Oh,” Simon said on a heavy exhale. “That’s—” He swallowed hard. “I don’t want to, like, intrude, or—”

He broke off as Jace took his hand, the one covered in come, and slowly and deliberately began licking it clean, eyes never leaving Simon’s. Simon watched, entranced, barely breathing.

When Jace was satisfied he’d gotten every drop, he smirked up through lowered lashes. “Simon. Come to bed with me?”

“Yeah,” Simon said breathily. “Okay. But if Magnus decides he hates me, I’m blaming you.”

“Do me a favor, and don’t talk about my future brother-in-law when I just had my hand down your pants.” Then, because it had proven such an effective way to get Simon to stop talking in the past (and definitely not for any other reason), Jace kissed him.

By the time they’d finished cleaning up and tumbled into bed, Jace was feeling loose and sleepy. He abandoned his previous, half-formed plans of getting Simon’s dick in his mouth in favor of lazy, unhurried kisses and caresses that were maybe too gentle for what this was. There would be time for blowjobs later. In the morning, maybe. After sleep, in any case.

Jace wasn’t aware of when kissing Simon in reality bled into dream.

~~~

Jace wasn’t hungover when he woke. He kind of wished he were hungover, because that would provide an explanation for why the world didn’t seem quite set straight and he felt vaguely nauseous that had nothing to do with the cold, empty bed he woke up in.

It was stupid to be upset Simon hadn’t stayed. Jace knew it was stupid. He’d known going in that it wouldn’t be more than a one-time thing. Simon had flat-out said it was a mistake. But there was a part of him that had thought—had hoped—maybe Simon would change his mind.

Telling himself he was just upset over having lost the chance for that morning blowjob he’d been planning, Jace forced himself out of bed and into the shower. The shower in Alec and Magnus’s guest suite was kind of amazing, with one of those rainfall shower heads and hot water that just never seemed to end. It helped ease some of Jace’s tension, and by the time he finished showering and pulled on some clothes, he was feeling almost back to his normal self.

Alec greeted him as he stepped out into the living room, already having claimed a spot on the couch. The room was back to its normal configuration, couch and loveseat facing a large, flat-screen TV. The coffee table held a giant plate of nachos, a bag of dry roast peanuts, and a disgustingly large tub of Red Vines.

“Welcome to the land of the living,” Alec said. “I was starting to worry you were going to miss the opening kick.”

“Please,” Jace said, flopping down onto the other couch. “I haven’t missed the opening kick of a bowl game since I was eleven, and that was only because you gave me the stomach flu.”

“Don’t blame me for that!” Alec protested. “Izzy was the one who started barfing first. If anyone brought that into the house, it was her.”

“Izzy didn’t give me big, sad puppy dog eyes and ask me to hold her hair back.”

“Hey,” Alec said, “we don’t talk about the hair, okay? Everyone makes at least one big mistake in their life, and mine was my seventh grade Zac Efron hair.”

“It’s my duty as your brother to make sure you never forget any terrible fashion choices you’ve made,” Jace said around a mouthful of nachos.

“You know that means it’s my duty as a brother to do the same for you, right?”

“You can try,” Jace said breezily, “but you and I both know I’ve never made any terrible fashion choices.”

“Two words for you,” Alec said. “Parachute pants.”

“They were on trend at the time,” Jace insisted. “My parachute pants were cool.”

“Keep telling yourself that, Jace. Parachute pants were never cool.”

Jace decided to be mature about the whole thing and chucked a Red Vine at Alec’s head. Alec ducked, then picked up the Red Vine from where it had landed on his shoulder and popped it into his mouth.

“That’s disgusting,” Jace told him. “I can’t believe you still eat those things.”

“It’s tradition,” Alec said with a shrug. “I only eat them on New Year’s. Besides, I like the sweetened wax aesthetic they’ve got going on.”

“Disgusting,” Jace repeated, pulling a Red Vine out of the tub for himself.

“Hey,” Alec said, suddenly serious, “you didn’t have to stay, you know.” When Jace just stared at him in confusion, he added, “You could have gone to Simon’s family thing with him. I wouldn’t have minded.”

Jace scoffed. “Of course I couldn’t.” He hadn’t even known Simon had a family thing today. “It’s tradition, like the Red Vines. Just because I’m dating someone and you’re about to get married doesn’t mean I’m going to flake on our New Year’s tradition.”

“Well, you should probably be prepared to make it up to your man when you get home,” Alec said. “He looked kinda upset when he left this morning.”

Jace’s earlier nausea returned suddenly, with full force. “He did?”

“Oh, don’t look like that. I’m sure he’ll get over it. The guy clearly adores you.”

“Yeah,” Jace said, pasting on a smile. “He does.”

“And I am glad you’re here,” Alec added. “I love Magnus, but he doesn’t understand football.”

“Not a fan, huh?”

“Worse,” Alec groaned. “He’s a Big Red fan. And he always gets so smug when they win.”

“And you’re sure you want to marry this guy?” Jace joked.

“Yeah,” Alec said, his whole demeanor softening. “I really am.”

“Which is a good thing, because our catering deposit is definitely non-refundable,” Magnus interjected, bringing a wings-laded plate to join the rest of the snacks on the table. “Besides, if I can get over the fact that you actually attended Columbia, you can deal with my allegiance to the clearly superior Ivy League team.”

“I’m not sure you can say you’re over it when you still say ‘Columbia’ like it’s a dirty word,” Alec observed.

“Nonsense,” Magnus said, settling onto the couch next to his fiancé. “I say dirty words with a great deal more relish. That was, in fact, an insult to dirty words.”

“You’re lucky I love you,” Alec said, rolling his eyes.

“That, we can agree on.”

“If you two are done being sappy,” Jace said, grabbing the TV remote and unmuting the pre-game commentary, “there’s about to be a game on.”

They were not, it turned out, done being sappy, but their cheerful bickering was almost enough to distract Jace from having woken up alone. Almost.

#shadowhunters #shmb2021 #jimon #jimon fic #jace wayland #simon lewis

[hexiva]

Not me making Vampire: The Masquerade OCs despite never being able to find an actual LARP group.

This is Dr. Lied Kalbfleisch (pronounced "leed," after the German word for "song" - he picked it because it's a pleasing gender-neutral noun and he's NB). He's a Tzimisce antitribu, about a hundred years old, practices medicine without a license and WILL get pissed if you refer to him as "Mr. Kalbfleisch" or "Ms. Kalbfleisch" instead of "Dr. Kalbfleisch" even though he definitely does not have a medical degree.

More details on him under the cut, including depiction of horrific historical periods and implied sexual abuse.

The internet is telling me there are no Tzimisce antitribu, but I don't know why that would be the case, you don't get to choose which Clan you get Embraced into, right, so why would your clan necessarily be a predictor for your allegiances? Like yeah, the Tzimisce are inhuman monsters, but like. So are all vampires, that's not special. Also I haven't got a group so no one can tell me no.

His bread and butter is performing gender confirmation procedures on other vampires (and sometimes humans). He was something of a pioneer in this, having been born in pre-war Germany. A young, effeminate man, he found his way to the Institut für Sexualwissenschaft, where he met and was treated by Magnus Hirschfeld and was issued a transvestite certificate. He worked there as a maid. The future seemed to be looking up - but disaster was coming to Germany, in the form of a wave of right-wing sentiment and homophobic, anti-Semitic violence.

Kalbfleisch was caught in a gay club by the police - only to be "saved" by an officer of the SA, secretly a Sabbat Tzimisce, who whisked Kalbfleisch away to be his kept man. The Tzimisce officer Embraced Kalbfleisch, and Kalbfleisch lived for about a year under his protection before the officer was killed in the anti-gay purges of the SA. It is not a year Kalbfleisch cares to remember. In the confusion, Kalbfleisch fled the country. In France, Kalbfleisch fell in with the Sabbat proper. Despite his hatred for his Sabbat sire, much of the Sabbat's ideology initially appealed to him - both the doctrines of freedom and the practice of valderie - and he was recruited into a small pack. He also did not feel like he had much choice in the matter; he needed support and community, and the Sabbat offered that.

This was the darkest period in Kalbfleisch's life, even including his imprisonment by the SA officer. He spent much of his time lurking in drug dens, feeding on the other addicts in order to vicariously steal their high. He was miserable. He hated himself and what he had become.

It was Cyrille Leroux who drew him out of his depression. Leroux was a fellow member of Kalbfleisch's pack, a barely-human, many-eyed Tzimisce of the Path of Metamorphosis. Kalbfleisch was attracted to Leroux's inhuman strangeness, and the two vampires fell in love, despite the dictates of Leroux's Path. Leroux was probably the love of Kalbfleisch's life.

It was Leroux's death at the hands of a fellow Sabbat member, the victim of vampiric in-fighting in the 1950s, that broke Kalbfleisch's loyalty to the Sabbat. He managed to make contact with the Camarilla, and made a deal, informing on his packmates in return for membership in the Camarilla. Now he exists on the outskirts of Camarilla society, useful both for his Vicissitude abilities and his knowledge of the Sabbat inner workings, but never fully trusted.

#vampire the masquerade #tzimisce #camarilla #OCs

[cami-chats]

Out Tonight

Fandom: Shadowhunters

Pairings: Clary Fray/Isabelle Lightwood (mentioned Raphael/Simon and Jace/Magnus)

Warnings: None (some drinking but like, they’re at a club)

Clary knew that it wasn't actually the end of her incredibly short-lived relationship with Jace that led to Izzy insisting they got out dancing that night. It was Izzy after all, and this was little more than an excuse to dress up for her. And to strong arm Clary into dressing up too, since Isabelle claimed she was hiding an absolutely gorgeous body under her 'hipster layers'. 

She didn't argue too much-- about going out, not her clothes because her clothes were fine-- because clubbing meant dancing with Izzy, and drinking with Izzy, and at the end of the night, making out with Izzy. To be honest, she was more excited about kissing Izzy tonight than she'd ever been for a previous relationship, and maybe that should have clued her in that she was lesbian years ago, instead of realizing it yesterday when she broke things off with Jace. Especially considering that she and Isabelle had been getting drunk and making out on and off for two years now. But whatever, it was better late than never (according to Raphael, Simon’s new boyfriend). 

Clary showed up at Isabelle's knowing that the only thing she'd be allowed to retain would be her boots. Sure enough, Isabelle opened the door, looked her up and down, then dragged her inside. "It's a good thing you came early." 

"I don't look that bad," she muttered. 

"You always look good Clary, but you could look great if you stopped sabotaging yourself." 

"Excuse me?" Clary asked, a little offended. 

Izzy huffed. "You're trying to attract women, and yet you're wearing a man's shirt?" 

"Uh." Clary look down at her shirt, double checking that it was the one she'd picked out earlier. Sure enough, she was still wearing the bright blue v-neck that clung to her. "It isn't?" 

"It's a man catching shirt, Clary. Some women like boobs, but it shouldn't be the focus on this outfit." Isabelle started rummaging through her closet, and she pulled something out with a triumphant shout. "Here, wear this," she said, tossing it at Clary. 

"This is a shirt." 

"On me it's a shirt. On you, it'll be a short dress." 

"I'm not that much shorter than you." 

Isabelle was too classy to snort, but her expression said it all. 

"Oh shut up," Clary said, shaking out the shirt/dress to its full length. "And turn around." 

Izzy rolled her eyes but turned. "Normally I'm willing to deal with you and your baggy sweaters with paint and charcoal stains, but we're going to Pandemonium specifically to get you laid, so you have to show some skin." 

"We're trying to get me laid? I thought we were going out dancing. Wait- did you say Pandemonium?" 

"I did." 

"Izzy, what the hell? We'll never be able to get in there, I don't think it matters how much cleavage you show the bouncer." 

"Relax, would you? It's all taken care of." There was a note to her tone that Clary didn't trust. If she didn't know better, she would swear that Isabelle was mixed up in something illegal with the number of places she could get into. 

"Isabelle..." 

"That's not relaxing. I will pull up that Zoolander song if I have to, don't think I won't." 

"When did you watch Zoolander?" 

"Simon showed me, back when he was still in love with you but thought he liked me." God, that had been an interesting time. Clary was very happy with her birth father in jail for trying to kidnap them, but the journey to get here had been so damn stressful. She never would've met Isabelle, Jace, or Alec without it, but that was a weird way of looking at the situation. 

Clary huffed, muttering something about friends conspiring against her under her breath. "Fine, I'm dressed. I hope you're planning on looking like a fucking sex goddess so that we don't look completely ridiculous trying to get in there." 

"That isn't relaxing either. I told you to relax." She looked Clary up and down, a pleased smile on her face. "See? You look totally fuckable. Give me a minute to get changed and then we can go." 

Clary didn't feel too bad about watching her change because Izzy didn't give a shit about how much skin she showed. The guilt mostly came from the fact that Isabelle thought they were friends and didn't know that Clary was harboring feelings for her. 

Izzy didn't look much different from how she normally dressed, in Clary's opinion. The difference between her street outfits and her club outfits was all in her makeup and the way she moved-- according to Isabelle, at least. Clary thought she looked totally gorgeous either way. 

*

Instead of getting in line, Izzy strode right up to the bouncer and smiled. "Lightwood, party of two." She had one of her hands in Clary's mostly so Clary couldn't run away-- which she'd tried so many times before that Isabelle didn't give her the opportunity to even think about it anymore-- and when the bouncer lifted the rope for them, she dragged Clary right through. 

"How did you get your name on the VIP list?" 

"I know someone," she said, smile widening. 

"But-" 

"Don't worry about it!" Izzy said, having to raise her voice as they got closer to the music. "C'mon, I'll buy you a drink. What're you feeling?" 

"Something fruity!" 

Izzy nodded, clearly having expected that. Clary didn't know why she even bothered to ask when every single time, the answer was the same. Clary liked the drinks that came out with fruit, a straw, and a violently pink color. Izzy, for some reason, liked vodka mixed with a soda and she never cared which soda it was, as far as Clary could tell. 

She dragged Clary over to the bar and placed their order. Someone gave Clary a lingering look, and Isabelle raised an eyebrow pointedly, as if to say 'see? fuckable'. It was hard to be too excited about it though, when all she wanted was to get to the part of the night where Izzy's tongue was in her mouth. 

The drinks were placed in front of Izzy, and she picked them both up, handing Clary's to her and staring until Clary rolled her eyes and took a sip. "Happy?" 

Izzy put a finger on the bottom of the glass and tipped it up, meaning that she wanted to Clary to keep drinking. "You need to have fun!" 

Clary glared at her and started gulping it down, stopping when the glass was half empty. 

"Good start! Now drink the rest and let's dance!" Izzy had already finished hers and was now staring at Clary in anticipation. 

Clary sagged a bit, but this was how their nights out usually went. Izzy gave Clary however many drinks she thought she needed to loosen up, they danced, sometimes Clary would dance with other people while Isabelle had another drink, sometimes they'd get another drink together, it just depended on the night. Clary finished her drink, and Izzy pulled her out to the dance floor, where they stayed for a few songs. 

This time, Clary was the one to drag her off with a quickly shouted explanation of, "I'm tired!" 

Izzy was smiling at her, arm around her shoulder. "Okay!" 

They were off to the side-- or as much to the side that you could get in a club-- and Clary was wondering if she could get away with asking Isabelle to leave. She'd phrase it like a girl's night out instead of wanting to get away from the loud music, and Izzy would probably say yes. She opened her mouth to say it, then paused. She still didn't know how Izzy had gotten in here, and if she'd spent a lot of money to get them on the list, then it would be a waste to leave so soon. 

Izzy's grin widened as she spotted someone over on the couches, and she said, "Come on," as she started walking over to them. When they got close, she raised a hand in greeting. "Magnus!" 

One of the men lounging on the couches straightened and smiled brightly at her. He had far more style than Clary could ever have, and even though she didn't like men, she knew he was absolutely gorgeous. The way he was looking at Isabelle was only happy, nothing ulterior, but that didn't mean anything. 

Clary's heart sunk as she realized he must be the reason they'd gotten in. Izzy had friends everywhere, but if they were looking at each other like this, it probably went beyond friendship. She tried to keep her disappointment from showing on her face, but she'd never been the best actress. 

He got to his feet in one smooth motion. "Isabelle, darling," he said, walking over and kissing the air over her cheek. Somehow, when he did it, Clary didn't feel the need to roll her eyes; it felt-- dare she think it-- genuine instead of a pretentious, dickwad move. God it was no wonder Clary couldn't catch Izzy's interest for more than a single night if this was the sort of person she was competing against. It just fucking figured that Izzy's type in more permanent partners was glamorous-- what Izzy was and Clary definitely was not. She couldn't even irrationally hate Magnus because then he turned to Clary and said, "You must be the friend Isabelle always talks about. Clary?" If he'd said it like he wasn't happy to meet her, this would be so much easier. 

She nodded numbly, and he stuck out his hand. 

"Magnus. I've heard quite a few good thing about you." 

"Can't say the same," she said, more than a little out of it as she shook his hand. A second later, she realized how rude that sounded and blushed bright red as she took her hand back. "I- I mean-" 

Magnus laughed, waving her stuttered attempts at an apology off. "It's fine. If she told you anything good, it would be a lie." He winked at Izzy, and Clary blushed harder, which she hadn't thought was possible. She was pretty sure she hadn't turned this red since that time she'd come home to find Izzy riding someone on the living room floor. She really really hoped she wouldn't have to see her and Magnus do anything like that, because just thinking about it was enough of a kick in the nads. 

"Thanks for letting us in, Magnus. Clary and Jace broke up yesterday, so she needed a good night out." 

"Happy I could help. Speaking of that little golden boy..." 

Izzy laughed. "Yes, he's single now. You already have his number, you know." 

"Hardly the point when he thinks I am uninterested." 

"Not my fault he doesn't notice you flirting." 

Clary frowned. "Are you two not together?" 

They both shook their heads. 

"Oh." 

"Aww Clary, you thought I fucked my way to the top. I'm flattered that you think so highly of my abilities, but no, this time we are solely friends." She turned back to Magnus. "How about coffee tomorrow? We can make it a double date. Sort of." 

"Nothing before eleven, and I'll be there." 

Isabelle nodded and gave him another hug. "I'll text you. See you tomorrow!" 

"Nice to meet you!" Clary said, and they walked away. Once they were far enough away, Clary asked, "Double date?" 

"You and me and Magnus and Jace, too if I can convince him to come." 

"So, you and me would be there as a date?" 

Izzy paused. "It doesn't have to be like that, that's why I said it's sort of a double date." 

"What if we uh, made it a double date? Like, officially instead of 'sort of'." 

"What?" Izzy asked, but it was a I-didn't-hear-you what, not a I-can't-believe-you-suggested-that what. 

Clary got up on her tiptoes and Izzy bent down a little so Clary could talk directly in her ear. "We should date! You and me, for real." 

Izzy didn't move for several long, heart wrenching seconds. "You sure that's what you want?" 

"Absolutely!" 

When Izzy pulled back, she had a breathless grin on her face. "Awesome!" 

"Great!" Clary said, knowing that she didn't need to, but too happy to stop herself. 

#shadowhunters #clizzy #clary fray #isabelle lightwood #fanfic #my writing

[haberdashing]

The Blind Meeting The Blind

TMA fic, sequel to A Rude Awakening. A few hours after waking up blind twenty-three years in the future, Elias gets the opportunity to meet another member of the Jonah Magnus Hate Club, though it doesn’t go as smoothly as he might have hoped.

on AO3

If Elias had thought things had moved quickly when he woke up, when the news was suddenly and unceremoniously dumped on him that he had been possessed by his old boss for the last twenty-three years and that the only reason he was himself again was because he’d been forcibly blinded, well, things just kept moving at that speed from there.

First there was the confrontation in the Panopticon, taking down Jonah Magnus for good, killing the body that had kept him going for over two hundred years now. The whole thing was strange and a bit overwhelming, naturally enough, but it was... it was good, knowing nobody else would have to go through what Elias had, at least not at Magnus’ hands. Also, if he’d had any doubt about the reality of the situation, about how the man Elias had known as generally decent boss James Wright had in fact been the founder of the Magnus Institute and had royally fucked up Elias’ life to keep running it, well, that was settled there. Which wasn’t great to know, exactly, but when so much had been up in the air, Elias didn’t entirely mind having a bit more certainty about his current situation.

Then there was the others--Jon, Basira, Daisy, and Martin--all rushing to explain a great number of things to Elias, some of which made his head spin, some of which didn’t seem possible, and yet all of which he was at this point willing to accept as his new reality, because it made more sense than any alternative he could come up with.

First, after Jonah Magnus was finally dead, the others explained how their lives, too, had been changed for the worse by Magnus’ actions in one way or another. Elias couldn’t help but think that he’d gotten the worst lot of the bunch, even after he knew what the others had gone through, but he kept his mouth shut about that. All that voicing that opinion would do was lead to arguments and risk alienating the few people Elias knew now, the few people he could tentatively see as his allies in this strange new world.

Then there was the explanation of the fear entities, how the Magnus Institute had always been dedicated to the service of the one Jon had called the Eye or the Beholding before, how there were thirteen other entities much like it dedicated to other commonplace fears, how people’s lives could be upended by encounters arranged in some way by these fear entities, how some actually chose to willingly serve one of them and were forever changed by that decision.

Oh, and apparently the world had ended, which really seemed like it should have come up a lot sooner in the conversation than it did. Apparently it was just common knowledge at this point, though, and everyone who hadn’t been unconscious for the last few months was beginning to take it for granted. Magnus had arranged for it to happen, apparently, had voluntarily assisted in letting all fourteen fears loose on the world. Had done it using Elias’ body, of course, but the others were very clear on the point that this didn’t make any of it Elias’ fault, though he hadn’t honestly thought about it that way before they all went out of their way to reassure him otherwise.

(Even with all this information being dumped on him en masse, Elias got the feeling that a few things were being left out or glossed over. Things that were more personal, perhaps, or things that might be sore spots for other members of this motley crew he had found himself part of.

For instance, all of them had seemed eager to touch briefly on the point that people could serve fears and then quickly move on without much in the way of further discussion, and Martin in particular seemed determined to reassure Elias that just because Jonah Magnus had used his body to end the world didn’t mean that the world ending was in some way his fault, while Jon was the lone man out in not uttering any of those same reassurances.

There were stories there, clearly, things purposely left unsaid, but Elias didn’t push to find out what exactly it was they were avoiding telling him. Those stories would come out in their own time, he figured. Better not to rock the boat.)

And after all of that, there was more, because aside from everything else Elias was in the future now, twenty-three years into the future--alright, maybe it was everybody else’s present day, and sure it wasn’t technically time travel, but that didn’t stop 2019 from still sounding more like the setting of a mediocre sci-fi movie than the actual current calendar year--and with that came a lot of mundane information to catch up on.

(Though sometimes it seemed like the others didn’t even remember 1996, or know how far back that really was compared to the present day, thought he needed introductions to things he already knew about--yes, Martin, he knows what the Internet is, thank you!)

So much had changed in politics, in entertainment, in technology... as their little group made their way to a restaurant (or maybe it was a bar? Elias wasn’t sure, and the name of the place sounded like it could go either way) for a celebration and a rendezvous with some like-minded souls, the others explained to Elias how cell phones had become both so common that it was unusual for somebody to not have one and so powerful that, despite by and large being smaller than the cell phones he was used to, the vast majority of them could wirelessly connect to the Internet in one way or another.

(Martin had even lent Elias his own cell phone to examine for a moment until all involved parties realized that without enabling some settings that none of them knew off-hand how to enable, all Elias could tell was that he was holding a smooth chunk of metal and plastic and glass and that it made various electronic sounds when he touched it or pressed any of its several buttons. Martin had meant well, at least. A for effort there.)

As Basira helped guide Elias into a seat, Martin asked, “Want me to put some music on? No use in having a smartphone if it doesn’t get to do anything smart, right?”

“Elias should probably get dibs, he’s never even used a smartphone before.” Daisy paused for a moment before adding, “My money’s on the Spice Girls.”

“What?”

“It’s era-appropriate, isn’t it?”

“Basira, don’t tell me you’re taking her side on this one.”

“Bet we could find an album from 1997 you’ve never even heard before, blow your little Spice Girls-loving mind.”

“But- no, I-” Elias turned towards Martin and, more importantly, away from Basira and Daisy, not really in order to hear Martin better but just to make a point. “Something from the Beatles, maybe? The Beatles are nice.”

“Beatles it is!” Martin started tap-tap-tapping away on his phone to get the music to play.

Here comes the sun, doo-do doo-doo...

“Oh, you’re no fun.”

Here comes the sun, and I say...

“Shut up.”

It’s all right.

Despite his banter with Daisy, only some of which was entirely facetious, Elias started to smile. Some of what caused his heightened mood was the choice of music to play in the background--he’d grown up listening to Beatles albums, wishing he could’ve seen them in concert, and hearing their music always reminded him of a simpler time, before Mum had died and everything had gone to hell. Some of it was the lyrics of this particular song--the world may have ended, and a lot may have changed very quickly, but he’d found a group of people who understood, who’d helped him through the worst of it, and...

Well, “all right” might be a bit of a stretch, but at least things probably weren’t going to get any worse.

That would take some real creativity on the universe’s part, for starters...

Little darling, it’s been a long cold lonely winter...

Not long after Martin stopped tapping at his phone, Elias heard a different tap-tap-tapping in the background loud enough to be audible over the music, the sound of something hitting the wood floor again and again, moving slightly closer each time.

Little darling, it feels like years since it’s been here...

“Melanie! Good to see you!”

Martin mumbled a quick “I’ll just put this away” and turned off the music he’d been playing, which was definitely the polite thing to do given the situation, but it still irked Elias some to have the music he was enjoying turned off so abruptly.

Elias turned to face Melanie, or at least to face in her general direction, shooting her an awkward grin and a silent wave, neither of which prompted any reaction he could discern.

A new voice--Melanie’s, presumably--spoke up, but didn’t quite return the group’s greeting as she pulled up a seat and flopped into it. “So you did it, then?” In a slightly lower tone of voice, a bit like a stage whisper, she added, “He’s dead?”

“Yeah. Yeah, we did it.”

“Thank God. I’ll drink to that--and I’m buying this time, too.”

“Oh, you’re buying? In that case...” Daisy raised her voice, making it ring throughout the... Elias still wasn’t sure if it was a restaurant or a bar, though his money would be on it being a combination of the two, as she said, “Hey, what’s the most expensive thing you’ve got to drink in here?”

“Yeah, yeah... pull a stunt like that and I’ll do it right back when it’s your turn to pick up the tab.”

“You would, wouldn’t you.”

“Round of Old Canoe for the table?” Basira suggested.

The group murmured a few words of assent, and Basira got up, presumably to hunt down their server.

“I thought Georgie was coming.” Jon said. He sounded surprised, but also... sad? Wistful? More emotional than Jon seemed to be most of the time, at any rate.

“She came down with a nasty cold yesterday.” Melanie replied. “Said she’d have to take a rain check on celebrating. Thought I should stay home too, but I told her I’d make it here just fine on my own. Which I did, obviously.” There was an edge to that last phrase, but though Elias could guess it had something to do with her not wanting to be underestimated, any further details were lost on him. (Another story left unspoken there, he presumed.)

“Ah. Well, when you see her, tell her... tell her I hope she feels better soon.”

“Right.”

A moment later, and six glasses of beer were set on the table, one for each member of their little group.

“Cheers?”

“Cheers!”

Everyone clinked their glasses together--somebody bumped their glass into Elias’ fingers at one point, but the minor ache that followed barely even registered against the background noise of agony that remained in the holes where his eyes should be--and then drank as one. The beer tasted awful, but Elias just kept gulping it down just the same, caring less about the taste than about the sheer alcohol content involved; if there’d ever been a night that called for some drinking, this had to be it.

Elias was a little ashamed to realize that he was the last one to set his beer glass down, having emptied it entirely before he did so.

“That tasted absolutely disgusting,” Elias pronounced, “and I want another glass of it immediately.”

Elias had expected this to prompt another round of banter, perhaps offense either real or feigned from Basira for not caring for her choice of beer.

Elias had not expected Melanie to burst out saying, “Why is Elias here?”

Elias had to think for a moment before responding. “Oh, we’ve, uh, we’ve met then?”

“Don’t even start with that, I’ve had more than enough of your fucking mind games already, I know my asshole ex-boss’ voice when I hear it!”

Somewhere in Elias’ mind, he quietly filed away Melanie’s outburst as proof that Daisy hadn’t been lying when she’d said some people had known him--or rather, known Jonah Magnus in his body, really--as “that asshole.” Great reputation to start out with right there. Thanks again, Jonah Magnus.

“Maybe he had my voice, but unless we met back before 1996 and I don’t remember, that- that wasn’t actually me you-”

Melanie spoke over Elias, apparently not caring enough about his words to even let him finish saying them all. Rude. “I thought you killed him! I thought that was the whole point! Didn’t you say you killed him?”

A few “shhh”s rang out through the table, presumably because talking loudly in a public place about having killed people was generally not a good life decision, but after that, it seemed like Elias wasn’t the only one scrambling to come up with a suitable response.

“We did kill him!”

“Sort of.”

“Yeah, sort of, it’s all a bit complicated...”

Melanie scoffed. “If you guys are letting Elias of all people pull some- some power of friendship bullshit, well, count me out.”

“It’s not like that!”

“What is it like, then?” The disbelief was practically dripping off Melanie’s words.

“It’s like some old bastard from the 1800s just finished hijacking my body for the last two decades and counting, that’s what it’s like!”

Elias got the feeling, in the uncomfortable silence that followed, that the others hadn’t actually expected him to butt in like that, that they had thought he would just sit back and listen quietly while they debated, well, him.

Melanie’s voice sounded a little less hostile when she spoke up again, which wasn’t saying much, but the disbelief from before was still there in full force. “Is that right?”

“Yes.”

“And do you have proof?” Elias opened his mouth to respond, but before he could settle on a word with which to begin his rebuttal, Melanie had already continued on. “And sob stories don’t count as proof. I already know you’re good at twisting words, I don’t need more of that. I want evidence.”

“I...”

Elias let the words trail off as he realized that evidence was something he was sorely lacking in at the moment.

How could he prove who he wasn’t? How could he prove that he wasn’t the asshole who’d taken over his life for decades without warning? How could he prove what he didn’t remember, what he didn’t know...

Wait. Knowing. That was it.

Elias turned towards Jon.

“Jon. That- that thing you did when we met, where you asked me about who I was and I had to tell you... somehow... can you do that again?”

Jon let out a long, low sigh before replying. “Compelling people isn’t some sort of parlor trick, Elias.”

“But it makes people have to tell you stuff, have to tell the truth, right? That’d- that’d have to work, wouldn’t it?” Elias turned back towards Melanie, though he naturally couldn’t see the expression on her face as he added, with a wry smile, “That’s got to be evidence.”

“Hang on.” Melanie said. “Didn’t you already try that on Elias once, and it didn’t work right, because... because Elias?”

“That was then. Things have changed... a lot of things have changed. It-” Jon sighed again, softly. “It would work now. Already did, in fact.”

“Then do it.” Elias insisted.

“You... you want me to compel an answer out of you?”

“Yes!” Elias responded, so quickly and emphatically that he wondered if that answer itself had been compelled, either purposely or accidentally.

“...fine then. Who are you, and why should we trust you?”

Elias could feel the compulsion for sure this time, the pressure, the tingle, as the words started spilling out of his mouth before he thought them through. Getting magically compelled to tell the truth was an odd feeling, and an odder one to start to be getting used to, and yet, here he was.

“I’m Elias Bouchard. Only child of Julian and Nancy Bouchard. Mum’s dead, though, has been since I was twelve. Dad might be too now, I suppose, ‘s not like I’ve had the time to check. As of a couple hours ago--or, or what feels like a couple hours ago, in May 1996--I was James Wright’s secretary back in the Magnus Institute, possible promotion under discussion. So we’ve got the Institute background in common, I think, but based on what I’ve heard, that might make you trust me less if anything. If there’s something I can be sure we have in common, though, it’s that we all hate Jonah Magnus. Bastard took twenty-three years of my life away--would’ve taken it all if you lot hadn’t stepped in, I suppose. Sounds like you’ve all taken a dislike to him as well for one reason or another. So that’s- that’s what I have to offer for myself. Just another member of the Jonah Magnus... what’s the opposite of a fan club? Anti-fan club? Hate club? The enemy of my enemy is my friend, and all that, right? Though he’s dead now, so...”

Elias had to take a few deep breaths when he was done, and his hands were shaking a little. That was... that was more than he’d expected to get into with that speech. Came with the whole compelling thing, he supposed, but still, it was strange to be involuntarily spilling his life story to a group of near-strangers.

As Elias focused on his breathing, he heard somebody laughing loudly, and realized with a start that it was Melanie.

“The Jonah Magnus Hate Club... God, I like the sound of that.”

“You- you believe me, then? Because I’m not sure what else I can do to prove it, but I swear, just because I’ve got the same face and voice as he had when- when using my body- it doesn’t mean that was me-”

“Well, I can’t exactly see your face, anyway.”

It took Elias a moment to put the pieces together, and when he did, his stomach lurched a little. He was starting to regret that beer. “They gouged your eyes out too, then?”

“What? No!” Before Elias could ask for clarification, Melanie continued, with a strange pride in her voice, “Took them out all by myself.”

“Wait, but you weren’t possessed by Magnus-”

“Close enough. I was stuck in the Institute, doing his dirty work, helping literally bring about the end of the world-”

Martin butted in at this point. “We didn’t know that part!”

“The specifics, no, but the general shape of it all...” Melanie let out a sigh before continuing. “Blinding myself... wasn’t exactly ideal, but it was sure as hell better than the alternative.”

“Well, that much I get. If the others didn’t take my eyes out, I guess I’d be either--either still possessed or just plain dead, I suppose. So yeah, I’ll take this over the alternative any day.”

Melanie drummed her fingers on the table for a long moment. “...can we start over? I never really... introduced myself properly, did I?”

“Sure.” Elias let out a shaky laugh. “Yeah, that’d be nice.”

“My name’s Melanie King. Was a professional ghost hunter-” God, Elias could hear his father’s voice in his head saying that that didn’t count as a real profession, but like hell was he going to give a voice to his father’s uppity opinions. “-then got roped into being an archival assistant for the Magnus Institute. Worked there for a few months, realized it was literally evil, got out the only way I could a few weeks before the world ended. Been living with Georgie ever since.”

Elias still didn’t know who Georgie was besides “the person that Melanie was living with” (and a suspicion, based on Jon’s reaction to her absence, that there was some history between the two of them), but, well, the puzzle pieces were starting to come together a bit more, even if more and more of them kept getting chucked at his head erratically as the hours went by.

“Got it. Well, it’s nice to meet you, Melanie King.”

“Same to you, Elias... Bouchard... sorry, that just sounds really weird, since you- well, not you--but ‘Elias Bouchard’ was my jerk boss-”

“It’s fine, I get it.” He didn’t get it, really, didn’t fully get a lot of this still, and calling it all fine was arguable as well, but a few white lies were worth it to preserve the fragile peace still being formed, Elias figured.

“You know what’s funny?”

“What?”

“I tried to kill you a couple times. Well, not you-you of course, but...”

Elias felt the tips of his mouth curling ever so slightly upwards. “Honestly? Can’t say that I blame you.”

#tma #tma fic #tma fanfic #the magnus archives #the magnus archives fic #the magnus archives fanfic #elias bouchard #melanie king #personal #my writing

[normal-thoughts-official]

Ok so I know some people in the fandom don't like talking about Magnus' past lovers because anyone that isn't Alec everyone just turns their heads but ok listen. Your last response about Magnus and queer history my head immediately went to Freddie Mercury and oh please I would like a little more insight on how they met and their relationship. The only thing we knew was that Magnus would go to his concerts and even drag his friends along. What I would give to learn more about them.

FUCK MY LIFE anon listen idk if you fully know what you're getting yourself into by asking me this because i am literally OBSESSED with Magnus' relationship with Queen and Freddie like im literally VIBRATING rn i was answering the questions in order but i just HAD to answer this one immediately because !!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck fuck fuck i love magnus' relationship with Freddie Mercury and Queen so much you dont understand, i have already made some posts and i still plan on making a playlist of Queen Songs That Remind Me Of Magnus but anyway hell yeah let's DO this

okay so first im gonna talk a little bit about how i view their relationship. now, they probably weren't in a very serious relationship, since theres this whole Magnus Locked His Heart Ever Since Camille thing, but Magnus and Freddie have SO much in common i cant really think this was just a fling, either. so here's what i think: magnus and freddie were good friends who sometimes hooked up and that definitely had chemistry to have something special, but it never happened because Magnus never fully allowed himself to give in to it and neither did Freddie - im assuming their relationship was in the 70s, since in the 80s Freddie met his husband, Jim Hutton, and at that time Freddie also had a hard time trusting and loving. also, Magnus was already in New York, so it couldn't have been too serious. but Magnus would go around to watch their concerts and every time he would find Freddie somehow (it wasnt that hard, really, you just had to go to the local queer scene) and they would sometimes hook up, sometimes just talk and enjoy each other's company, sometimes both. that's what i think it's most likely.

but the absolutely OFF THE CHARTS amount of vibing they must have done. i dont think you fully understand - unless you're a queenie trash bitch such as me - just how similar magnus and freddie are. here's a short, comprehensive list of Freddie Mercury Traits:

Freddie was seen and stereotyped as an overly sexual, lothario, diva and inconsequential kind of guy, and to some extent he put on this facade, but in reality he was extremely closed off and insecure and loving, and this was mostly a persona he put on to protect himself

Despite that whole persona, Freddie was an extremely compassionate guy who did everything he could to help others, particularly other queer people. His personal assistant, his chef, his chaffeur, all were other queer guys (sometimes his exes even) that had nowhere else to go and were in need of a job, and Freddie was just like "oh, would you look at that, you're hired now. I'm gonna pay you, hm, 3 million" it was so. When Jim lost his job Freddie hired him as a gardener. They literally met because they were talking in a club and Freddie was all like "lets all go to my house" and brought in a bunch of strangers to his home. That's the kind of guy he was. His house was always open as well

Freddie was loyal to a fault and a little bit too trusting, and was stabbed in the back a few times. The most well-known one is P*ul, who outed him against his will despite them having years of friendship, a blow that Freddie never fully recovered from, but there were others. Despite being a shy guy and reluctant to open up, he actually wore his heart on his sleeve and this sometimes ended up hurting him, a lot

Freddie felt absolutely lonely and like he was unworthy of being loved. This is not a secret, its a common theme in a lot of his songs, the most prominent of them being somebody to love. He wanted to be loved and taken care of but at the same time wouldnt allow himself

He was also very insecure. Jim says in his book that Freddie would frequently ask him, out of the blue, if he loved him, despite the fact that they were, you know, married (not in the paper, of course, but Jim bought him wedding rings and Freddie called him his husband, so i consider them married)

He was constantly scared of being an inconvenience. When he found out he had AIDS, his first instinct was to tell Jim that if jim wanted to leave him he would understand. Jim, of course, said that was bullshit and he wouldnt leave Freddie because of that

He was a perfectionist and always wanted to do his absolute best, nothing less. He was also a creative genius as we all know

He loved cats and would bring random cats into his home constantly

He loved fashion and pretty things

He was a queer, gnc man of color

He had a pretty protective side to him; queen's bassist, John Deacon, was extremely shy and said that Freddie pretty much shielded him from the press attention, and also helped him polish his song writing skills and always wanted him to do his best. After Freddie died, John quit the showbusiness.

I mean, remind you of someone? Holy fucking shit, i nearly lost my goddamn mind when they mentioned that he hooked up with Freddie, because they're so similar in their issues and insecurities and interests it's almost meta. I don't know if that was on purpose or not, but i thank the sh writers every day for that line tbh honestly i am so blessed

Unfortunately i think they might kind of be too similar - you get two very insecure, afraid to be hurt people who kind of have a persona together and it's kind of hard to have them have a meaningful relationship. But where Freddie was shy, Magnus was extroverted and easygoing, and there were always parties (something the both of them loved) and they had enough common interests to bond over. Also, they both couldnt help but wear their heart on their sleeves, even when they tried not to. And i mean, i am 100% sure that Magnus absolutely loved Queen, because 1- who doesnt? 2- the songs are so intense and heartfelt and beautiful and theatrical and that's right on magnus' alley; 3- the lyrics just speak to him, because there Freddie was, writing about wanting to be loved and fearing to open himself up, and there was also Brian writing all these songs about seeing your loved ones die, and Roger was a domestic abuse victim - there was just so much for him to relate too. So i can definitely see Freddie and Magnus staying up awake late at night, looking at the window and talking about themselves, their fears, the personas they have created and how hard it is to break out of them, when they were alone in a hotel room and everyone else who was at the party was gone. Just the two of them, having heart-to-hearts, then sleeping, but the next day the magic was gone and they were both back to guarding themselves - also, Magnus was avoiding getting involved with mundane men, if you go by my headcanon. so there was just too much holding them back

but it was still an important relationship that helped the both of them learn more about themselves and get a little more used to opening up and allowing themselves to talk about themselves. they didnt really break up as much as drift apart - Freddie had the band and Magnus was high warlock of Brooklyn and the political tensions in the downworlder community were high. But they both got their happy endings after all - Freddie met Jim and they were together until the end of his life, and Magnus met Alec, who will be with him for the rest of eternity too because i said so :) so its all good, in the end, and Freddie will always have a special place in magnus' heart, as both an amazing human being that he was honoured to meet and someone who was really, really important to magnus and that helped him become who he is today and be a little happier and more comfortable with himself

he still loves queen and listens to them constantly. sometimes its bittersweet to think about him, but most times its just good to hear these songs that mean so much to him and think of how far theyve both gone

#sh #shadowhunters #magnus bane #magnus bane meta #magnus meta #sh meta #meta #ask #anonymous #overflowing trashcan #not gonna tag as queen cuz this aint gonna be very interesting to queen fans djdjfjd

[glorious-spoon]

all the broken hearts still beat

Title: all the broken hearts still beat Link: On AO3 Fandom: Shadowhunters Pairing: Alec Lightwood/Magnus Bane Warnings: None Rating: Teen Other Tags: Outsider POV, Established relationship, Pride, Future fic Summary: Weird shit tended to happen at Pandemonium.

*

Really, Shawn should have just gone back home after the parade ended. It was swelteringly hot outside, he had an early shift the next day, and the chaos and the press of bodies was starting to feel oppressive instead of celebratory, which just made him irritated and sad. Last year, with Cody, this had been so much fun. Of course, that was before Cody decided to go fuck some bartender in the East Village like the perfect fucking cliche that he was, so…

God. This just utterly blew, but Jamie and Bryn had dragged him into their favorite club with the explicit plan of cheering him up, and he didn’t quite have the heart to ditch them just yet. At least there was air conditioning inside. And alcohol. And Jamie was buying the drinks, which was sweet even if it was just because she was trying to talk him into finding some random stranger to take home and slake his broken heart with, or what the fuck ever.

He took another morose sip of his drink, vodka and artificial blueberries cloyingly sweet on his tongue, as Jamie nestled against his side, scanning the crowd with all the shrewdness of a buyer at a horse auction. Finally, she nudged him with one sharp elbow and pointed toward the far end of the bar.

“What about him? He’s cute.”

Shawn followed her gesture. The guy was pretty hot, at least if the drab paramilitary look was your thing: tall, dark-haired, a spiky, abstract tattoo half-visible on the side of his neck, disappearing into the collar of his plain black t-shirt. He was holding himself like he was expecting to get attacked at any minute, arms folded, expression closed-off as he scanned the crowded bar, looking like nothing so much as a blot of dark ink in the middle of the cheerful whirl of color that was Pandemonium at the height of Pride.

Shawn grimaced. “No way. Look at him, he’s probably a cop.”

“You’re such a cynic,” Jamie said.. “Maybe he’s just shy. Or closeted.”

“A closeted cop,” Shawn said. “Thanks, but I’m pretty sure I can do better. I’ll just enjoy the eye candy from over here, where I can make a quick escape if he breaks out the handcuffs--don’t even start,” he added as Jamie opened her mouth, a puckish gleam in her eyes. “Please. We agreed not to mention that.”

“I never agreed to anything,” Jamie said, grinning, but she let it go. “Okay, fine. We’ll leave Mr. Tall, Dark and Broody alone.”

“Thank you.”

“But I am getting you laid.” She slipped an arm around his waist and he let her, dropping a kiss on the top of her head, where her short hair was stiff with spray-in glitter. “You need to stop moping over Cody and get back out in the game.”

“Please don’t bring up the C-word.”

“Cody, Cody, Cody… Shawn, it’s been a month and a half. I’m done watching you cry into his old t-shirts. You need to move on.”

“I shredded his old t-shirts, actually. It was therapeutic.”

“I’m proud of you,” Jamie said, only a little condescendingly, and slipped away from his side. “Fine. I’m going to go find Bryn and make sure they haven’t decked anybody yet.”

“You mean you’re going to go find Bryn and drag them into a dark corner to make out,” Shawn said. She shrugged like that was more or less the same thing, which, yeah, it probably was. It was also a tacit apology, and a more tactful one than Jamie usually managed. He waved her off when she made an apologetic face. “Go, go. Have fun. I’m just going to stay here and mope a little more.”

“You break my heart,” Jamie sighed, but she leaned up on tiptoe to kiss his cheek before slipping into the crowd, making her way toward the dance floor where Bryn was holding court, the matching glitter in their hot pink Mohawk sparkling under the rainbow lights. He watched as Jamie slipped in between two cute leather-clad boys to loop an arm around their waist, as Bryn grinned huge and sweet and pulled her into a kiss, and then he looked away before his battered heart could implode entirely from jealousy.

Tall, hot, probably-a-cop guy was still standing by the end of the bar, still as stiff as if he’d been ironed and then strung up on an invisible clothes hanger. There was a deep furrow between his brows as he peered into the chaotic crowd like he was looking for something in particular. Something, or someone.

“Excuse me, excuse me, thank you darling.” Somebody jostled Shawn hard enough to spill most of his drink over his wrist and arm. There was a shivery slide of silk against his bare skin, and the man who had just bumped him turned, placed a warm hand on his elbow, just briefly. He looked like a kaleidoscopic dream in the uncertain light, glitter smeared across his cheeks and an intricate tangle of chains falling over his bare chest, diaphanous silk draped across his shoulders like a robe. It was no stranger than any of the other outfits Shawn could see in the press of bodies, but something about him seemed ethereal, otherworldly, too vivid: like a painting that had been clipped out of its frame and pasted into this dull reality. He blinked, stared, and then the man patted his arm, said, “Excuse me, my dear, I’m so sorry,” and slipped past him into the crowd.

Shawn blinked after him, then looked down at his drink, then blinked some more. A moment ago, it had been the dregs of vodka and blue syrup and ice in a flimsy plastic cup. Now, his fingers were wrapped around a crystal Collins glass, frosted and filled to the brim with something that shimmered lazily where it caught the light. His sleeve, which had been soaked through an instant ago, was entirely dry.

What the fuck?

There was a peal of laughter from the other side of the room, and he looked up in time to see his mystery man come to a stop in front of the guy who was, actually, probably not an undercover cop from the way his face was softening, from the way he reached out and settled a palm against the other man’s cheek, smiling like he was in on the best kind of joke. Shawn hadn’t particularly been attracted to him when he’d looked like a scowling statue, but now—

“Magnus,” he was saying, half-laughing. “What is this? How much did you have to drink?”

“Oh, it’s a celebration.” The other man--Magnus--snapped his fingers, and there was suddenly a glass in his hand that Shawn hadn’t noticed before. “Now. Try this, I promise you’ll like it.”

“Like the last three, you mean?”

“No, no, this one’s perfect. I promise.”

“I really don’t trust you,” the man said, laughing, but he accepted the glass.

“That hurts me,” said Magnus, but he was smiling, watching avidly as the other man tipped the glass up to his mouth, took a drink, then licked his lips. “Well?”

“It tastes very… blue.”

“Blue.” Magnus’s mouth was twitching, something that was both amused and frustrated building in his handsome face. “Alexander, my love, you are perfectly infuriating sometimes.”

“I’m serious,” although he was grinning, a wide, happy smile that made him look like an entirely different person all of a sudden. “Here. You want to try?”

“Of course.” But when he reached for the glass, it was only to set it down on the bar top. Then he cupped Alexander’s face between his bejeweled hands and drew him in to kiss him, deep and thorough. When he finally pulled back, he tapped his mouth thoughtfully, then said, “You’re right. It does taste blue.”

Shawn snorted, dropping his gaze to his own cup, which, yeah, was still made out of glass and still full of something that was definitely not the cheap mixer that Jamie had bought him.

Weird shit happened at Pandemonium. Everybody knew that. It just wasn’t something anybody talked about. Sometimes you’d see people with horns slipping into the VIP lounge, the layout shifted without warning and with no sign of ongoing construction, the bathrooms were always clean and the music was always just what you wanted to hear and occasionally--every once in a while--you might wind up with a drink that didn’t look like anything you’d ever tried before without quite meaning to get it, and it would be absolutely perfect.

Bryn had once told him, only half-joking, that the owner was a wizard. At the time, he’d laughed at them. But now—

He glanced up again. The two men were slipping away toward the back room, but the shorter one, the one who’d been called Magnus, glanced back at him and smiled. For a moment, just a moment, his eyes seemed to gleam an inhuman, draconic gold.

It might have been a trick of the light. Maybe. Before he could get a better look, they were both gone.

Still, Shawn found himself smiling, something loosening a little in his chest as he turned back to the dance floor. Bryn and Jamie were grinding together to a song he didn’t recognize, something with a dark driving beat that he could feel in his bones. He’d been thinking about heading home, but maybe he’d stay a little bit longer. Maybe he’d even go dance.

He lifted his glass to his lips and sipped; it tasted like frozen sunshine, sparking on his tongue and spreading warmth through him.

It was Pandemonium, after all. Anything was possible.

#shadowhunters #malec #shadowhunters fic #malec fic #my fic

[lightwormsiblings]

Apple Juice

Read on AO3

Alec is leaning against the bar at Pandemonium watching Izzy and Jace in the throngs of people on what is supposedly a dance floor. He can’t really tell over the amount of grinding bodies covering the space.

The Lightwood siblings go out most Friday nights. It’s tradition. It had started when Alec was 10, Izzy 9 and they’d snuck out to an abandoned parking lot to watch the sun rise over the city. It had become a thing then, waiting till their parents were asleep and then sneaking out into the night. A few years later Jace had joined them, and their Friday night adventures had evolved into Alec trying to stop Jace from getting himself killed while Isabelle looked on in sheer delight. Even later, it turned into this. Going to a club and dancing and drinking until they were giggling into each other’s shoulders and saying things that would absolutely be used as blackmail from then until forever. The point is, Alec has been sneaking Jace and Izzy out on Friday nights for more than a decade and they’ve always come back in one piece. He’s learned how to keep tabs on them. Tonight, that’s by sitting by the bar and watching Jace make a fool of himself trying to impress some girl.

He laughs into his glass when Jace does a ridiculous dance move that was probably supposed to look sultry but ends up making him look slightly constipated.

Alec startles when he feels an arm brushes against his and turns to look at the person who has come to lean against the bar next to him. And, well, to be frank, his entire brain shuts down.

Because standing next to him is probably, no, most definitely the most beautiful man he’s ever seen.

The man is wearing a silk purple shirt that is unbuttoned down to his navel to reveal a smooth muscled chest. To make it worse (or better, Alec can’t really decide), there are layers of necklaces draped over the exposed skin, making his chest look even more inviting.

Alec knows he’s blatantly staring, but he can’t stop. Or, probably more likely, he doesn’t want to.

The man’s lips curl slowly into a smirk and Alec stares, enraptured by the way his lips shine pink with - is that lipgloss?

“Hey pretty boy,” the man says. Alec keeps staring. It’s takes him a moment to realize that the man is addressing him.

He stupidly points at himself to confirm this and lets out a breath when the man’s smirk turns into a smile of genuine amusement.

Alec watches the way the necklaces swing and hit his chest as he leans further onto the bar, and consequently, further into Alec’s space.

“Let me buy you a drink,” he offers, eyes drifting down to Alec’s now almost empty glass, “Whiskey?”

Alec just nods because he’s not about to tell this beautiful man that he hates whiskey. Or even worse, that what he’s actually drinking is decidedly not alcohol. More like apple juice. Nope. He isn’t saying that out loud. It’s too mortifying.

He’d thought it was a good idea to stay sober tonight seeing that he has patrol at ass o’ clock in the morning the next day (yes, he did volunteer for a patrol on a Saturday morning. Yes, he does hate himself) but now, he can see that that decision had been a grave error.

The bartender drops two glasses onto the bar in front of them. Alec slowly picks up one of the glasses and sighs in resignation. He’s going to have to drink this abomination of a drink. The man sends him a heart stopping smile and Alec can’t even be mad about it. Goddamnit.

As soon as the liquid touches his tongue he recoils, grimacing. He tries to hide it by turning his face to the side but the man sees anyway.

“Are you sure you like whiskey?”

Alec contemplates lying. He even contemplates getting up and walking straight out of the club. Both options would be better than admitting to the apple juice.

For some reason he chooses the hard option. Probably because he’s an idiot.

“I don’t like whiskey,” Alec confirms, getting slightly distracted by the way the man arches an eyebrow questioningly, “I was drinking apple juice, not whiskey.”

The man’s eyes are full of amusement and Alec tries to sink into the ground so he doesn’t have to hear his answer.

“You were drinking apple juice.” he repeats slowly, looking as if he’s trying not to laugh. Alec groans inwardly. Of course the one time the most gorgeous man in the world shows interest in him, he has to fuck it up. With apple juice of all things.

“I was trying to impress you basically.” Alec blurts out bluntly, stopping and evaluating his words and then fixing them. “Or well, trying not to humiliate myself actually.”

The man laughs, loud and unabashed, head thrown back and eyes squeezed shut. Alec lets his eyes sweep over the long line of his neck and the small crinkles that form next to his eyes as he laughs.

When he’s calmed down somewhat he moves his hand to hover over Alec’s glass gracefully. Alec watches as blue sparks dance from his fingers and they move hypnotically over the glass.

Oh. Not a man. A warlock.

“It’s apple juice now, Nephilim.” The warlock says, telling him that he knows Alec is a Shadowhunter and handing the glass back.

This time Alec is the one who laughs, incredulously, but still a laugh. For some reason this warlock hasn’t left Alec’s side even though Alec has confessed to drinking apple juice at a club, and he knows Alec is a Shadowhunter. So Alec turns fully towards him.

“I’m Alec,” he ventures, taking a sip from the glass and smiling when he finds that it is indeed apple juice.

“Magnus.”

Alec watches as Magnus picks up his own glass to take a sip, staring at the way his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows. He doesn’t manage to tear his eyes away fast enough because Magnus is looking at him with amusement dancing in his eyes when he places his glass back down on the bar.

“See something you like?” Magnus asks, eyelashes brushing against his cheeks and voice lowering to something resembling a purr.

Alec has to stop himself from nodding vehemently because that would probably be embarrassing. Though, he’s not sure he can embarrass himself more than he already has.

“Maybe.”

Alec pats himself on the back for managing to be smooth, but his victory only lasts a second because suddenly Magnus is leaning into his space and Alec can smell sandalwood and what he thinks might be the sugary scent of magic wafting off of him.

“I definitely see something I like,” he tells Alec on a sigh and Alec forgets how to breath for one long second.

For the second time that night Alec points dumbly at himself to confirm that Magnus is indeed talking to him.

Magnus eyes go from dark and mischievous to wide and fond in the space of a second as he lets out a quiet laugh and circles Alec’s wrist with long fingers.

“Yes, you, Alexander,” Magnus confirms and Alec almost spontaneously combusts at the way his full name rolls off of Magnus’ tongue as if it’s some sort of song.

Alec looks down at where Magnus’ fingers are curled softly around his wrist. His thumb has started to rub soothing circles into his pulse point and it’s an oddly intimate gesture for someone Alec literally met a few minutes ago. Though to be fair, it feels like Alec has known Magnus much longer.

When Alec looks back up at Magnus he finds him already staring back at him. His eyes are bright and his lips are quirked in a devastating half smile that has Alec’s nerves lighting on fire.

“What do you say we get out of here?” Magnus asks softly, releasing Alec’s wrist and offering his hand.

Alec looks at the hand and then turns to the dance floor where his siblings are. Jace is too drunk to notice Alec, but Izzy seems to have already been watching him. She sends him a subtle thumbs up, lips curled into a knowing smirk. Alec rolls his eyes back at her before turning away.

He turns back to Magnus’ offered hand and slips his own hand between ring clad fingers with a smile.

“I’d love to.”

#my writing #malec fic #malec #alec lightwood #magnus bane #isabelle lightwood #jace wayland #sh fic #shfanficnexus #idk what this is #some sort of weird canon au that amused me so i posted it

[hiddlesgirl]

SH 319: Aku Cinta Kamu

I really enjoyed this episode and there were some really great moments, but there were a couple of things that I didn’t like too. I am enjoying dark Clary and the Team Evil dynamic is fun to watch; Sizzy is continuing to develop; Izzy is a weaponry badass; and Magnus is absolutely breaking my heart. Asmodeus is a fantastically complex character, Jack Yang is awesome, and he is one of the best villains.

However, I do wish that they had chosen a different episode title; we all got so excited because we knew (even non-book readers) that Aku Cinta Kamu was a Malec quote so we had high expectations for Malec scenes in this episode. We were disappointed because all the Malec scenes were flashbacks (even if they were amazing ones) and there was barely any Alec at all. I think it would have been better if the episode title had been something like ‘Glorious’ instead.

We begin the episode with Magnus walking alone down a deserted street, we presume that it must be about 5/6am in the morning; 318 took place during one night with the break up being around (I presume) 4am, just before sunrise, so it has probably been about 2 hours since then.

What hurts so much about him walking around New York like this is the fact that it’s because he literally has nowhere to go. He lost his home, he doesn’t want to burden Catarina who is sole guardian of Madzie and he can’t go back to the Institute; he feels so completely alone because there is no one there for him and there is nowhere for him to go.

Despite his loneliness right now he is still completely wary of Asmodeus and his intentions, he knows that Asmodeus only does things for his own gain and he doesn’t want to be around his toxic influence.

Asmodeus gives Magnus his magic back; I know that some people were a little disappointed with how Magnus got his magic back. I completely understand wanting Magnus to have been able to love and accept himself, to see the amazing things about himself without magic before he got it back. For him to have that journey of self discovery and acceptance; to learn something from it. But I also understand how it happened, it was completely Asmodeus using everything he could to manipulate Magnus into a vulnerable and more receptive state; to take his magic which pulled him into depression and then to force away the man he loves in order to leave him vulnerable enough to let Asmodeus back in. It was about getting Magnus into a similar state as he was when he was a child.

Harry’s acting in this moment is impeccable; you can see the happiness and relief on Magnus’ face to have his magic back, to have this part of his identity restored. But that morphs into distrust because he knows that Asmodeus never does anything for free and is scared of the consequences.

I think Asmodeus is a very intriguing character because he does seem to love Magnus in his own twisted way, a possessive kind of love. We have seen this with Lilith, they want that person to love them and only them; it is reinforced with the language they use, they hardly ever use their child’s name instead saying ‘my son’ or ‘my boy’. They refer to them in a possessive way, to call them in the way that refers to their connection to them instead of their name which infers independency.

When Alec arrives back at the Institute Izzy asks if everything is okay because she knows about the deal Asmodeus offered him; you can tell that Alec has fallen into his habit of pushing his emotions to the side and being a soldier. He has closed his emotions off and is concentrating on his job; this is his way of coping because he knows that with everything going on he doesn’t have time to be able to mourn his relationship. Plus, he is trying to avoid feeling the sadness, guilt and utter devastation by concentrating on other things.

I think that Jonathan’s reaction to Jace’s note is very interesting, he wants Clary all to himself and wants Clary to love only him; it is very similar to Lilith and Asmodeus. He wants to be the only person Clary loves and constantly reaffirms his ‘claim’ on her by calling her ‘little sister’ instead of her name, though he does use her name occasionally. This makes sense because this is how he was taught to love.

Magnus sees a couple holding hands which triggers a flashback in which Alec takes Magnus to a place in New York where couple attach locks. I really loved this scene, Alec’s excitement about wanting a lock for him and Magnus; it seems partly because he wants to experience things other couples do and partly because he wants to show Magnus and the world how permanent their love is.

It is a really beautiful moment between the two of them, once again showing us these little moments in their relationship that show just how much they care about each other. My heart breaks when Magnus destroys the lock, it is done out of hurt because they attached that lock as a sign of their eternal love but that promise has been broken; he can’t bear to see this token of love that seems false to him in that moment.

You can see that hurt and anger turn to devastation as the lock disintegrates as he realises not only what he’s done but also that the break up seems even more final. It is a visual representation of what has happened to their relationship.

I have said many times that I don’t like Jordan and explained why so I am not going to go over that again; my issue with this scene is that they kiss. With their past it was just really uncomfortable to watch and I think that them going into kiss and then Maia turning at the last second so he kissed her cheek instead would have not only worked better but would have been less uncomfortable (and maybe upsetting for those who are really affected by this storyline).

I like that Jace seems to be more active in starting conversations with Alec regarding his feelings and his relationship, in previous seasons it has felt very one sided. He is completely confused as to why Magnus and Alec have broken up; especially knowing that Alec was planning to propose. He knows how happy Magnus makes Alec and that they have a strong relationship so he doesn’t understand why this has happened and is trying to get Alec to open up to him.

Alec is trying everything to avoid talking about it, you can see him start to get choked up and upset as the conversation progresses. He can’t afford to let his emotions out right now because if he does he will break; he feels like everyone is depending on his with being the Head of the Institute and the added pressure of getting Clary back.

Jace convinces Clary to let him come with them by using the truth to cover his deception; he uses his true love and dedication to her as a guise. I quite like dark Clary, she is very intriguing and will not allow Jonathan to control her; in fact Jonathan is very deferring to her, and it’s an interesting dynamic.

The flashback of Malec getting ice cream with Madzie was very sweet, and my heart both soared and broke when they starting talking about having kids; inferring that they intended to have a family together one day. We know how much family means to Magnus, the Downworlders he takes in become his family and he will protect them with everything he has. Plus, as far as we understand no one has wanted to have a family with him before, just like no one has wanted to marry him, and you can only imagine how much it meant to him to hear someone say that they saw children in their future.

I really like Raphael, he admits his mistakes and accepts the consequences; it is really nice to see how happy he is now that he is mundane. It also warms my heart to hear about him being able to attend morning Mass and plant flowers on Rosa’s grave.

I understand why he has gone to see Maia, he feels responsible for Heidi, but I am a little confused as to why he hasn’t sought out Magnus. Magnus is like a father to him, they have a strong bond, yet they have had no scenes together this season despite everything that has happened to them.

Simon is scared of needles (I relate) but Izzy distracts him by talking about Superman; I think that this is a very sweet scene for them. Bonding more over these films and Izzy accepting that she is seeing Simon in a different light now, all this time she has seen him as a great friend but now she see’s all the attributes in him that she identifies with (doing whatever it takes to help those you love) and the potential of a romantic relationship.

I saw that some people didn’t like it because of the implied toxic masculinity related to the attractive woman liking nerdy guy with glasses after finding out he’s a superhero; I understand that and it is true of a lot of older films that are steeped in sexism, stereotypes and clichés. 

But, personally, I don’t think the scene itself was problematic; I just think they were using the Superman film to further establish that they are seeing each other in different lights now that they have been spending more time together and seeing these different sides of each other.

Outside the club Jace is trying to get through to Clary by stating how much he loves her, it seems very familiar to how Clary would try to get through to Jace when he was the Owl but it doesn’t work. It seems to me that the Twinning Rune works more like creating a second personality than possession, it’s as if this is who Clary would have been if she had been raised by Valentine. It’s very interesting but I wish we knew for definite more about how the rune worked.

The flashback montage to the song ‘Signals’ by Frey Ridings is heartbreaking because it takes you on a very condensed version of the Malec story which is very emotional; one thing I do wish though is that they had included little moments from scenes we know had been cut, such as the extended balcony scene from 207 or the hug at the end of 212. Plus in the middle of the scene when we see present time Magnus there is a very awkward and unnecessary zoom into his face, really wish they hadn’t done that and just the next time they cut back to him it was a closer shot.

I really like learning more about Magnus and Brother Zachariah’s friendship, I love that to Zachariah this conversation was important enough for him to break his vow of silence. That really shows just how important Magnus is to him.

We get another confirmation that for Magnus Alec is different than everyone he has been in a relationship with before, this has been stated or hinted at several times since they met but unfortunately Alec doesn’t seem to get the memo. Magnus has lived with the memories of the people he loved and lost for centuries but he can’t bear his memories with Alec; this was a person who opened his heart after decades of being closed off, who has shown him unconditional love and acceptance, who has been there for him during his darkest times, who has loved him despite the prejudices of his community and who he saw himself having a family with.

Zachariah refuses to take his memories because he knows Magnus will regret it, no matter how much he is hurting right now Alec is a part of him, has changed him and removing all of that would not help Magnus, it would simply return him to a closed off state and Zachariah doesn’t want that for him.

Maia and Jordan go to the Institute very upset about the fact that the serum has been destroyed, it is understandable because they were hoping that they could have a second chance at a mundane life. You can see Simon’s frustration beginning to mount because they cannot understand how difficult the situation was and how quickly they had to act in order to stop Aldertree and anyone who may have been loyal to him.

He tells them he understands wanting to go back, with everything that he has done and has happened to him he wishes more than anything that he could go back to a mundane life but saving the masses from non-consensual neutralisation was more important. Plus, using the last few vials to stop Jonathan, who is a threat to everyone, is more important than giving them to their friends.

The Bone Chandelier is a great set, Clary’s shocked face that the bones were from Shadowhunters kinda makes me laugh a little because it is no different than how Shadowhunters used to take Downworlder marks as trophies.

I really did not like the scene that follows because Jace is pressured into taking an unknown substance, which we know is probably a hallucinogenic because it’s a Seelie drug; we know that Jonathan is trying to get Jace to slip up so he can prove his disloyalty to Clary but pressuring someone to take drugs is always going to be uncomfortable.

The entire make out scene is really uncomfortable for me because it is non-consensual, in my opinion. Jace is, unwillingly, under the influence of perception altering drugs and you can see that his initial demeanour is confused and slightly resistant; so from Jace’s perspective it is definitely non-consensual. With Clary, she is also under the influence of drugs and she is currently a different person than usual, so we are not sure how much consent she can give in this state (which is why I think the rune needed more explanation). Even her line about Jace being able to say no made me uncomfortable because it was followed with ‘But you won’t’ which implies the lack of ability to refuse.

I feel bad because I know that this was from the books but for me it was so uncomfortable because the situation feels very non-consensual.

I know that the purpose was for Jace to lose concentration and for Jonathan to see the ring, but the hole in that is that Jace should have taken off the ring because he knew he had ingested drugs and I am sure they could have done it in a way that was more consensual. Maybe if it was a less powerful drug, or a non-hallucinogenic, or if Jace seemed more into it, or if Clary’s line was worded differently; I don’t know, but I just don’t like the scene how it is.

I really like that Maia took the time to think about what Simon said, she is a very mature and compassionate person; she knows that she is not the only person whose life has been destroyed by becoming a Downworlder. She knows that she doesn’t deserve it more than anyone else and that to demand it would be wrong. I love Maia so much.

Jordan on the other hand has stolen the vial; I had a gut instinct that he was going to steal it. My only problem is how, the vial was in the room with Izzy and Simon, it is a big vial so is not easy to quickly conceal and how did they not notice it was missing? Anyway, since Jordan heard about the serum he has been single minded in getting his hands on it; to me it seems very selfish in thinking that all his problems started with becoming a werewolf and that by becoming mundane again it fixes that. I may be wrong, we’ll have to wait and see.

I adore Izzy! I loved seeing the weapons master side of her, and seeing the scientist in her these past few episodes; it was amazing to see her create a new Glorious.

The fight scene in the club was well choreographed and it was a good scene; it was nice to see Clary and Jace fighting side by side again too. However, I do think that it was way too easy for Jonathan to grab the Seelie Queen, after all this time of her being built up as this powerful and untouchable character he only needed to take out one knight in less than a minute and grab her. I did see the footage of Luke dislocating his shoulder in this scene though, and that looked really painful.

After they finish fighting the Seelies Clary turns on Jace, she is clearly angry and upset that he has betrayed her trust and is trying to separate her from Jonathan. This moment is a real testimony to just how different Clary is right now, although her conviction to fight for those she cares about (that being Jonathan right now) is very Clary. Again, I just wish we knew more about how the rune worked so that we could understand its influence and Clary’s state right now.

I must say that I laughed out loud at Jace sliding along the Institute floor; it was just so comical even though it wasn’t meant to be. I really feel for Jace because you can see the devastation and almost loss of hope on his face. He can’t recognise the person Clary is right now and in that moment he feels at a loss of how to help; he feels like he has lost her all over again.

I do really feel sympathy for him because he had to suffer through thinking she had died and that he was part of the reason why; then the happiness of getting her back; watching her battle the rune’s influence over her; and now watching her become this completely different person than he knows. She is the first and only person in his life he has loved this much and to keep losing her must be absolutely soul crushing.

Watching Magnus pull his memories of Alec from his mind you can see how much they are torturing him, he cannot bear the loss of him; he loves Alec so much. Also Alec is the first person who thought his eyes were beautiful, knew who his father was and didn’t care, who he told his dark past to and he accepted. Alec has been different in so many ways and he loves him so much; to have Alec walk away from him is tearing him apart.

Asmodeus is the one to stop Magnus from destroying the memories; he wants Magnus to remember the pain that Alec caused him, he wants to use that pain to manipulate Magnus. If Magnus forgets Alec than he will no longer be in an emotionally vulnerable place and it would be much harder for Asmodeus to get back into his life. Magnus is upset and confused as to why Asmodeus is persisting; he knows that Asmodeus never truly cared about him and is trying to remind both of them of that.

Asmodeus tells Magnus to keep the memories to make him stronger and wiser; Magnus keeps the memories I think partially because of what both Zachariah and Asmodeus said, but also because looking at them there is a part of him that can’t let Alec go.

Harry’s acting in this scene is absolutely amazing, especially considering he had nothing to react to; he generated emotion purely from his imagination. He blows me away every time he performs an emotional scene like this, he is always fantastic but these emotional scenes really get me.

Magnus allows Asmodeus to comfort him, this is understandable because he is so upset and vulnerable right now that he needs comfort and support and right now Asmodeus is the only person offering that to him. Asmodeus’ smirk sends shivers down your spine because you know that his intentions are anything but good but he is such a great villain.

I know that some people were disappointed and annoyed that Magnus did not figure out the connection between Alec leaving him and Asmodeus turning up. But Magnus is completely blinded by his emotions right now and can’t think logically; all his feelings from losing his magic and the trauma surrounding that don’t just disappear when he gets it back, it is going to take time to work through those emotions still. Plus, he is swamped with the disbelief, anger, hurt, confusion and devastation of Alec leaving him; which is a continuous onslaught, whirlwind and swinging between anger and hurt with all the flashbacks he is experiencing.

Also, not only did he lose his relationship but he also lost his support system. After losing his magic (his job and his home) Alec has been the only person who has consistently been there to support him, no one else (Catarina, Raphael, Izzy, Simon, Clary, Jace) has made the effort to reach out to him.

The person he loves is gone, his support system, he has nowhere to live; right now the only person in the world who is actively seeking him out to offer support is Asmodeus. He is at his absolutely lowest right now, completely emotionally destroyed and vulnerable; he needs someone now more than ever and the only person there is Asmodeus. It’s no surprise that Magnus takes whatever support and comfort he can get.

Plus, although their relationship ended badly Asmodeus is still his father; he is still the person who took him in when he was a child and had no one else. Asmodeus was the only person who would help him as a child and he is the only person offering him help now.

I know that some people were also wondering why Magnus did not go back to Alec once he regained his magic; the answer is simple, would you? Alec confirmed Magnus’ greatest insecurity by saying that everything that is special about him came from his magic (that spark inside you was out for good). Alec left him when he was at his emotional lowest, saying that Magnus was too much for him to handle; another insecurity of Magnus’, that he is ‘too much’ for people. Why would he go back to someone who doesn’t want him?

To say it in real world terms; if you were very wealthy but suddenly lost everything and then your partner left you, would you call them to come back if you suddenly regained your wealth? No because that person left you when you had nothing, if they don’t deem you worth their time when you have nothing why do they deserve you when you regain everything?

This is why I think that Malec getting back together is going to be complicated and perhaps a bit messy. I do want them to get back together, of course I do, especially with there only being three episodes left (at the moment. #SaveShadowhunters!). But I think that the issues surrounding the break up are too important to just gloss over or forget about.

Even though Alec made the deal for Magnus’ happiness he still made a major life decision without Magnus’ knowledge or consent. They definitely need to have a conversation about this because although Magnus will understand Alec only wanted to make him happy, he still made a huge decision about Magnus’ life for him. Plus, it was a decision that left Magnus feeling at rock bottom, abandoned and unloved when he was at his most vulnerable.

I am not trying to hate on Alec at all, I love him and I understand why he made the deal; he wanted to make Magnus happy and he thought it was the only way to help him. His own insecurities about his importance, both in Magnus’ life and in general, made him believe Magnus would recover from losing him.

Plus, there is the fact that Alec worded the break up to use Magnus’ insecurities against him. This is such a complex situation and the definitely need to talk about it in order to learn, recover and move forward.

I really liked this episode, but I definitely has issues with the Maia/Jordan scene and the Clace makeout.

I loved Izzy being an absolute weaponry badass, the Sizzy bonding and Magnus’ journey was incredibly painful.

In 320, Clary and Jonathan continue their quest to get Morningstar, a battle is coming up in Idris and Asmodeus is definitely planning something. I’m really looking forward to the 3B season finale (I know there is 321 and 322 but this is the 3B finale).

Also, in the promo is looks like Magnus is back in his apartment and it will be interesting to find out how that happens but I hope that it isn’t because of Asmodeus because that will solidify Lorenzo’s belief about Magnus’ power coming from his father.

Plus, it looks like Magnus is attacking Asmodeus; whether this is because he learns about the deal or because of Asmodeus’ plans remains to be seen.

Who’s excited?

#Shadowhunters Review #Aku Cinta Kamu #Shadowhunters #SH 319 #SH3x19 #SH 319 Review #Shadowhunters 319 #SH319 #SH 3x19 Review #SH 3x19 #Shadowhunters 3x19

[bigboysdontcry]

MlM all of them!💕

1. Do you like resting your head in a boys lap, or on his shoulder?

shoulder, it’s easier to kiss him that way

2. Sweaters or hoodies?

hoodies

3. Netflix or clubbing on a Friday night?

netflix, or just, streaming something in general

4. Denim or leather jackets?

leather jackets!! 

5. What’s your favorite thing about boys?

this is hard because I just.   love boys so much???? i love everything about them, but if I have to choose then their laughs, and sleepy voices. i love boys voices so much. they’re so good. 

6. How do you like your tea?

it depends on the tea and what im in the mood for, sometimes hot tea with a lot of honey. iced peach tea is delicious too. 

7. How do you like your coffee?

with a decent amount of creamer and sugar, or a mocha from a coffee shop. 

8. Favorite fall color?

maroon

9. Can you drive?

yeah, i’m a small town gay i didn’t have a choice. 

10. Do you have a crush?

Yes And Its The Worst Feelings Are Dumb, He’s so fucking cute like who gave him the right? 

11. What’s your favorite sport?

hockey!!!!

12. Are you a pastel, neon, or neutral color mlm?

idk??? I think I’m more of a pastel out of these choices

13. Do you wear makeup?

I used to, I have a lot of makeup products that I haven’t used in a long time because of dysphoria and such, I want to wear makeup but I just get so scared of everyone. 

14. Do you like boys taller or shorter than you?

taller but that’s only because I’m so short mostly everyone is taller than me. I don’t mind shorter tho, I’m less insecure if we’re the same height. 

15. Do you prefer hand kisses, or nose kisses?

hand kisses, it’s so old romance i live for it

16. What’s your favorite cologne smell?

oh shiiiit I love almost all cologne smells. um. the one i have that i love is like, cedar, and warm woods, with like. a hint of vanilla. it’s so good?? anything woodsy and maybe a little sweet smelling? that’s good stuff. 

17. Ideal date?

either something calm and private like, cooking together and then watching something and cuddling, or going to see live music or something. nothing too intense and we get the chance to just like. talk and take up the same space together. there also should be a LOT of making out. 

18. What’s more romantic: cabin getaway, or tropical vacation?

cabin getaway. I love camping and being in the woods and nature and shit. 

19. What’s your favorite mlm movie?

i haven’t seen a lot of mlm movies, if any. I think i saw like. five minutes of brokeback mountain. as far as like, on screen tho I’m gonna say Alec and Magnus in shadowhunters. i know it’s  a cheesy teen show based on a ya book but fuck i love them. 

20. Do you believe in love at first sight?

not really

21. Have you ever been in love?

so many times??? and im in love rn with nico

22. Do you like sitting in a boys lap, or do you prefer when a boy sits in yours?

I’m happy either way but I like sitting on another guys lap because I love being held and plus I’m smaller than most guys. 

23. Metal or cloth bracelets?

cloth

24. What’s one of your favorite memories of being in love?

making them laugh and when they’re mid laugh having them tell you that they love you

25. Do you tilt your head to the left or right when you kiss?

I think the right, depends on how they’re angled but mostly the right. 

26. Would you like to take his last name when you marry?

nah, I like my last name. unless like. I really really really loved him and he had an awesome last name or something, idk I can’t think of a last name so let’s just make one up like idk Sella or somethin

27. Do you want kids?

I don’t know. I’m gonna be honest I have no idea. Sometimes I think I do but I also. I’m scared and I don’t think I can handle that responsibility but ya know I’m only 20 so who knows

28. Do you interlock fingers when you hold hands?

yes! 

29. What’s a compliment you’d love to receive from a boy?

“you’re voice sounds amazing” or something about my smile, or eyes, i just. i want a dude to call me handsome. or tell me how good i look in dress clothes because fuck those are dysphoria inducing. 

30. What’s better, waking up to him in the morning, or falling asleep next to him at night?

waking up to him, definitely

31. Any turn offs?

bad breath, bossy/pushy, acting like a dick around friends but nice in private like wtf is that, 

32. What makes you blush?

neck kisses, someone saying heyyyyy in that voice, um. being called pretty boy, a lot of things make me blush. This guy smiled at me and I was red for 10 minutes. 

33. Coffee shop or dog park date?

coffee shop.

34. Big spoon or little spoon?

I’ll be either, I love being the little spoon but I also LOVE holding someone. 

35. What first catches your eye?

eyes and smile, sometimes jaw line. 

36. Would you enjoy it if he bought you flowers?

I wouldn’t be upset. I’d probably be more excited about it when it happened than just talking about it hypothetically ya know? 

37. Do you think matching couple outfits are cute or cheesy?

cheesy 

38. Have you ever asked a boy out?

LOL NO

39. Which is cuter, him being confident, or shy?

hmmmmm. it depends. Confidence is HOT but shy is adorable. I like when they’re shy when you’re talking and maybe they’re nervous to ask you something or say something. 

40. What’s one of your fave love songs?

peach by the front bottoms

[alilactree]

Turn The Memory To Stone

Malec fic set after 2x13. Also deals with 2x12. Kinda sad, kinda not.

“You never have to prove yourself to me,” Alec says. He has a thousand other things he needs to say to Magnus, everything has been so fucked up lately, he’s been so fucked up lately, but all that comes out is a strained and stuttered, “I love you.”

And Magnus, who has every right to still be angry instead, cups Alec’s face and says he loves him too and kisses him. Alec grips Magnus by the hip and shoulder and kisses back, here on this patio that’s become a sanctuary of sorts for the both of them, together and separately.

Alec pulls away and rests his forehead against Magnus’s, taking a moment to just breathe and be. He can feel the tension still in Magnus’s body, the way he stands just slightly away from Alec instead of leaning into him. “You’re still angry,” Alec states lightly.

“A little,” Magnus admits. His tone is gentle, though, sad more than anything.

Alec licks at his lips, thinking of what to say, and realizes he tastes something smoky-sweet and alcoholic. “You’ve been drinking.”

Magnus pulls away at that, but a small smile plays at his mouth. “A little.” The grin slips, and sadness returns. “Or, a lot.”

Magnus has endured so much heartache lately, and the reality that Alec played a part in that heartache because he’d ignored his instincts, disregarded his own heart, yet again. The weight of that sits heavy and dark on his shoulders. “Magnus, I—“

Magnus stops Alec’s incoming apology with a wave of his hand. He steps inside, his back to Alec. He doesn’t want to talk about. He doesn’t need to hear Alec apologize again, though Alec feels he could say it a million times and it wouldn’t be enough. Instead he tries a different approach, saying lightly, “Well, it sounds like I have some catching up to do. What are you drinking?”

Magnus’s responding glance is hard to read; his expression is flat, his eyes steady on Alec. He looks beautiful, heartbreakingly so.

“Whiskey,” he finally answers. “But I’ll make you something else.”

“Okay.” Alec answers easily. He’ll take whatever Magnus is willing to give him.

Magnus whips up something using both magic and not. Alec watches his hands move, the incredible, sure, elegant way he inhabits his body. What sort of horror it must have been to not be, Alec can’t imagine. He doesn’t know how to fix it, and Magnus doesn’t know what to tell him. Maybe he can’t. Maybe that’s okay. Maybe he just needs to be here.

“An Old Fashioned,” Magnus says, handing him a drink. Alec thanks him and tips the glass to his lips. It’s sweet, but not.

“We’ll find something you like yet,” Magnus muses, amusement dancing in his eyes at whatever Alec’s face must be doing.

It’s a promise for the future. Their future.

They don’t talk much; Alec drinks and Magnus mostly putters around restlessly. He drags ringed fingers along the horn of his old-timey record player, and Alec watches intently with the alcohol beginning to stir hot in his veins.

“Do you dance?” Magnus asks, then answers himself, ruefully. “Of course not. You’re a shadowhunter. A very serious and devoted one, at that.”

The dig is warranted, but it still stings. “I don’t dance,” Alec confirms, “But maybe I’ve just never had anyone to show me how.”

There’s a beat of silence between them, a moment that could go either way, depending. Magnus rubs his middle finger against his thumb, Alec draws himself up to his full height.

“If I took you somewhere, would you dance with me?” Magnus asks. Unsaid is his real question: Do you trust me?

“Yes,” Alec says.

When they step from the portal in an alleyway, their hands stay clasped. Alec was expecting Pandemonium, given the outfit Magnus changed into. It’s not. It’s a gay bar, Alec isn’t sure in what city, but most definitely a gay bar.

“I feel under-dressed,” Alec shouts over the pounding pulse of the music inside. Magnus, with his silky red shirt unbuttoned to his sternum, skin tight pants, heavy eyeliner and multiple necklaces and rings isn’t even the most extravagantly dressed. By far. “Maybe I should have worn a mesh tank top.” Alec jokes, nodding to a group of men in the center. They’re nice looking, despite the mesh clothing, and Alec lets himself look, without shame. That’s a bit of revelation, for him.

“Hmm, that does paint a rather nice picture,” Magnus replies in a muffled pause between the music, looking Alec blatantly up and down. “But I think I prefer you as is.”

Alec smiles widely. He doesn’t hear that very often. Magnus smiles ruefully back and sighs. “It’s very hard to stay angry with you, Alexander.” The music blasts again, and Magnus says something else that Alec can’t hear, so he tugs Alec onto the crowded dance floor. There are bodies writhing everywhere around them, male bodies, attractive male bodies, writhing against each other and for a moment Alec is stricken, frozen in place.

What the hell is he doing?

But Magnus takes both of Alec’s hands, places them on his shoulders, then sets his own hands on Alec’s hips. He presses in, chest to chest, moves his shoulders and Alec’s hips in time to the music, then leans in to say into Alec’s ear, “Back and forth with the beat. Just like that. Easy.”

Alec tries, following the movement of Magnus’s body with his own. He feels stiff and strained. Magnus, however, looks as if his body was made to move to music. Liquid and slinking against Alec, his hips grinding against Alec’s with the beat of the song, his breath hot against Alec’s ear.

Alec may well combust on the spot.

He strips off his lather jacket, and Magnus magics it away. No one notices. He moves behind Alec, now plastered chest to back, hip to ass. His hands slide up Alec’s chest, mouth set against Alec’s neck, and together they move with the pulse of the music.

Alec closes his eyes, tries to focus on dancing and nothing else, but Magnus pressed against him like this, the way his fingers trail across Alec’s chest and stomach, down his hips and thighs and— It’s too much. “Magnus,” he cranes his head to speak, and Magnus catches him in a hot, hard, off-center kiss. Alec groans into it, unable to stop himself. If Magnus keeps this up something very embarrassing is going to happen very soon.

Magnus releases him, spins him around, and presses in close again, chest to chest, hip to hip.

“Magnus, I’m—“

“I know.”

Magnus slows their movements, out of rhythm now, their own dance. He cups Alec’s face and leans their foreheads together, just as they had been out on the porch. “Magnus…” Alec whispers, unsure of what he intends to say next. But Magnus closes his eyes and replies, “I know.”

Whatever Magnus had hoped to happen here doesn’t seem to have worked out as he’d planned. The melancholy returns to his eyes and when the music quiets again he takes Alec by the hand and says, “Lets go home.”

Back at home, in bed, Alec holds him. A mirror of the way they’d danced at the club, with Magnus tucked back against his chest, Alec’s arms wound tight around his torso. They don’t speak, but Alec gives him the space and security to feel whatever Magnus needs to feel.

He hopes that’s enough.

“I love you,” he says. He hopes that’s enough, too.

#malec #malec fanfiction #shadowhunters fanfiction #my fic #lilac writes #shadowhunters

[aang-shadowhunters]

Hello ! So I was thinking about a prompt : the 3 or 5 times Alec gives Magnus a nickname (Babe, love...) in private and the one time with everybody around (Jace, Clary, Max, Izzy...) I hope my english isn't too bad ! Xoxo

I’m so sorry this took so long. This was a really cute prompt. I’ve always enjoyed fics where couples give each other nicknames.

1.Alec woke up to a beam of sunlight shining in his eyes. He rolled over with a groan of discomfort, and opened his eyes to see someone else in bed with him. Then he remembered; of course, he spent the night at Magnus’s. He’s been doing that a lot lately, and he couldn’t be happier. A few minutes later, Magnus began to stir and his eyelids started to flutter.

As he started to slowly wake up, Alec got closer, and wrapped his arm around him side.

“Good morning, Magnus.” Alec said softly to a still sleepy Magnus. Once he had his eyes open, Magnus, with a soft smile on his face, reached over to put his hand on Alec’s face.

“Good morning, my love.” Magnus said while caressing Alec’s cheek with his thumb. Alec blushed slightly at the nickname, but still smiled brightly.

“We should probably start getting up and ready for the day.” Alec said, still feeling bashful from the nickname Magnus gave him. He was still not yet used to terms of endearment, and he was certainly starting to.

“Absolutely, Alexander. Let me just go take a quick shower, then we can start our day.”

2.Magnus and Alec were on a date at a club they’ve never been to before. Alec may not be the best dancer ever, his tall frame could often make him clumsy, but he knew some moves. At one point, a slow dance came on.

“Oh, Alexander, this is the perfect slow dancing song. Come dance one more dance with me.” Magnus held out his hand to Alec.

“Okay.” Alec said, hesitantly. He’s never exactly slow danced with anyone before, so he was kind of nervous. Though, he’s sure Magnus would help him not make a fool out of himself.

Once they got to the dance floor, Magnus presses his body against Alec’s, put their hands in the correct positions, and led them in a gentle dance. This isn’t so bad, Alec thought to himself. The dance mostly consisted of just gently swaying back and forth to the music, which wasn’t as difficult as it sounded. Being pressed this close up against Magnus was making him feel safe and loved, despite being surrounded by other dancing couples.

“I love you, Magnus.” Alec whispered into Magnus’s ear.

“I love you too, angel.” Magnus whispered back.

Angel. That was yet another nickname that Alec was going to eventually learn to love.

3.Magnus and Alec were sitting on the sofa on Magnus’s balcony. It was a beautiful spring evening, and the two of them were lounging together, just enjoying each other’s company. Magnus was leaning against Alec’s chest, and Alec had his arm wrapped around Magnus’s shoulders.

“It’s such a lovely evening.” Alec said softly.

“It definitely is, Alexander.” Magnus said with a sigh. “We’re lucky that we get to spend it together.”

“Hey, um, I have something for you.” Alec said, nervously.

“Oh? What is it.”

Alec pulled a small box out of his pocket, and opened it. Inside was a necklace on a long chain, and a small medallion with the love rune inscribed on it.

“I hope you like it. I got it made at a mundane jewelry store.”

“It’s wonderful. Thank you so much, sweetheart.” Magnus said with a loving expression on his face.

Alec smiled at the nickname, and wrapped his arms around Magnus tighter.

+1Alec was giving a private briefing to Jace and Isabelle about a mission they were about to go on. Magnus was there to reinforce the wards on the Institute.

“Ok, you guys, let’s gear up.” Alec said urgently to his siblings.

Magnus went over to Alec to wish Alec luck. He hug him in a warm embrace.

“Go get'em, my darling.” Magnus said, a little more loud than he intended. So, of course, Jace and Izzy heard it.

“Aww, that so sweet!” Izzy said. “Are you two on a nickname basis now?”

Alec, with a blush on his cheeks, said, “Um, well- we, ahh-”

“It’s okay, Alexander, don’t hurt yourself.” Magnus said, chuckling a little.

“So, um, are you sure you can’t come along? We could really use you help.”

“Thank you for the offer, but no. Your parents hired me to reinforce to wards around the Institute.”

“Okay, well, then we should probably get going. Let’s go, you guys.”

As they started walking towards the door, he heard Magnus jokingly say, “Good bye, darling!” And scowled as Izzy salted giggling.

Send me your Malec and Jessa prompts, and I’ll write you a drabble: https://shadow-readernwriter.tumblr.com/ask

#my fics

[sahibookworm]

The original tag was created by ReadLikeWildfire and Earl Grey Books!

I’m not someone who is fond of doing wrap-up posts, but I also feel that giving some sort of update about my first half of the reading year will make me happy. And hopefully, all you friends of mine are also interested to know about all the wonderful books I’ve read these past six months. And before I get started with the tag, let me give you a tiny overall update about my reading year and goals.

Goodreads Challenge: I’m upto 91/130 books.

1000 Followers on the blog: I’m at 982 right now, so hopefully I’ll reach my goal soon.

80% on Netgalley: I’m going steady at 85% and hope to keep it up.

Stars and Sorcery Book Club: I have actually read all our BOTM’s and I am very proud of it.

Around the Year in 52 Books: I’m at 44/52 but the remaining prompts are gonna be a bit tough.

Year of the Asian Challenge: My goal was to read between 21-30 books for this challenge and I’ve already finished 28 books, so I count this as a win too.

I’ve also never used charts and graphs to show my updates before, but everyone seems to be using them and they look awesome and colorful, so I’m gonna give them a try too.

As you can see, majority of my reads have been romances (which also tend to be contemporary) with fantasy coming closest second. I think I will also be happy if I can maintain around 10% for non-fiction till the end of the year.

This one definitely makes me feel very proud because almost half my books are ownvoices and I only hope this count increases as the year goes by.

This is definitely a bit unexpected because I love YA, but I seem to have gravitated towards reading more adult romances this year. Hopefully I can make similar inroads into adult fantasy in the latter half of the year.

This chart totally reflects me because I love reading ebooks and have also been trying to listen to more audios. What I didn’t realize was that I have been reading a lot more ARCs and I hope I continue to be approved for them.

A majority of my reads being 4 star and above surely shows that I have become a bit better at picking books that suit my taste. I surely hope I read many more 5 stars before the end of the year.

Now…. Let’s get started with the tag…!!!!!!!

💨 1. Best book you’ve read so far in 2019:

Well, it was a given that Red, White and Royal Blue was gonna be here because it was such a delight to read. But an unexpected addition to my best books of the year is the finale of the Bone Witch trilogy,  The Shadow Glass because it’s one of the most emotional and satisfying conclusions I’ve read in quite a long time.

💨 2. Best sequel you’ve read so far in 2019:

I just couldn’t choose between Soul of the Sword and The Heart Forger because both of them are excellent and very action packed than their predecessors, and we also can’t help but fall in love with the characters more.

💨 3. New release you haven’t read yet, but want to:

These were some of my most anticipated book releases from the first half of this year. Now, I just have to find time to read them all.

💨 4. Most anticipated release for the second half of the year:

There are many many books on my most anticipated list for the upcoming months and I even listed many of them in this post, but one very recent announcement that has me excited is Rachel Maddow’s next. I really love watching her show and was pretty impressed by her other book Drift, so I’m very sure this one will be amazing too.

💨 5. Biggest disappointment:

I have other books which I gave lesser ratings to, but The Women’s War was more of a disappointment because I was expecting so much more from it, and it just didn’t have a lot of substance. On the other hand, I suddenly got the ARC for The Seduction Expert (which I wasn’t expecting) and read some rave reviews, so decided to give it a try – it turned out to be just downright awful.

💨 6. Biggest surprise:

While I was very excited to read We Set the Dark on Fire, I just didn’t expect to fall in love with it so much, and the world building was so amazing too.

I decided to pick up Magical Women on a whim because I wanted to know more about the sci-fi fantasy landscape in the Indian publishing industry and was pleasantly surprised by so many talented authors masterfully blending SFF tropes with Indian mythological elements.

The Priory of the Orange Tree was too intimidating and I didn’t think I would read it, but decided to take it up as a challenge and was very surprised by how easy it was to read. Definitely worth the size of it.

💨 7. Favorite new author (debut or new to you):

While I read some awesome debuts this year, I want to mention a new-to-me author Rin Chupeco. I knew the Bone Witch trilogy was supposed to be good but I was amazed beyond expectations because it was such a different kind of fantasy but highly impressive in all aspects, and also gave me one of my favorite OTPs of this year.

Reviews: The Bone Witch / The Heart Forger / The Shadow Glass

💨 8. Newest fictional crush:

I had to think a lot for this because apparently I don’t seem to have crushed on many characters this year. But one who comes closest is Zavier Demos, the pansexual aromantic rockstar drummer from Syncopation. He is talented, sexy and has a very cool head on his shoulders and I really enjoyed reading his story.

💨 9. Newest favorite character:

In this case, I actually couldn’t choose again because I have a lot of favorite characters this year but one who’s definitely impressed me the most is Yumeko from Shadow of the Fox. She is sweet, trusting, loyal and very brave and I completely adore her. Another one is Lady Tea from The Bone Witch. She has one of the best character developments I have ever read and she is the most loyal and loving person ever.

💨 10. Book that made you cry:

This is so easy to answer because there is no book that could make me cry more than The Song of Achilles. I remember sobbing in anticipation even before the inevitable happened. Another book that made me very emotional was Ghosts of the Shadow Market because it’s about Jem and he is one of my favorite characters from that universe, and reading his journey through so many tumultuous times made me weepy.

💨 11. Book that made you happy:

While Book Boyfriend might not make it to any all time favorite lists of mine, it made me very happy because it featured a romance author hero and a romance blogger heroine, and had so many relatable situations. The Candle and the Flame was a quiet and atmospheric fantasy but it made me happy because of it’s very inherently desi elements and reminded me a lot of home.

I don’t need any particular reason to love The Red Scrolls of Magic other than it being about Magnus and Alec and them being together makes me extremely happy. Sandhya’s books are always a delight to read but There’s Something About Sweetie is special because it features a happy fat brown girl and I could see so much of myself in her.

💨 12. Favorite Book to Movie you’ve seen this year:

I haven’t seen any movies but I eagerly awaited and watched the final season of Shadowhunters and wept when it finished. Whatever the detractors say, I really enjoyed watching this show a lot.

💨 13. Favorite post you’ve written this year:

I love writing reviews but I know I’m not that good at it like my other lovely blogger friends whom I’m in awe of. But a couple of reviews which I poured my heart into are Red, White and Royal Blue and Good Talk. I also loved writing the post about the Books that define my reading life.

💨 14. Most beautiful book you’ve bought so far this year (or received):

I mostly rely on my library and other subscriptions for reading books but one among my kindle purchases that is gorgeous is King of Scars – I adore the golden aesthetic. And after resisting all these months, I finally bought the paperback of Foundryside in June because it’s amazing both inside and out.

💨 15. What books do you need to read by the end of the year?:

There are obviously many new releases I want to read but these are two backlist books I wish I am able to read sometime this year. I feel I have put them off long enough.

💨 16. Favorite book community member:

I am actually very happy to have many book community friends these days, especially my dearest ones in the Book Dragons India discord group, but a very recent friend I’ve made is Liz @ Lost in Literature with Liz. Both of us have quite a few things in common and we love lamenting about the fact that we can never pick our next read or find the right motivation to continue. Do checkout her blog for amazing reviews and more interesting bookish discussions.

I am not tagging anyone but if you wanna give an update about your reading year, please consider yourself tagged and link back to me so that I can read all about it.

Half Yearly Check-In AND Mid-Year Book Freak Out Tag The original tag was created by ReadLikeWildfire and Earl Grey Books! I'm not someone who is fond of doing wrap-up posts, but I also feel that giving some sort of update about my first half of the reading year will make me happy.