#it has to get better

[sundalion]

Guys if anyones asking where I went, I’m reading Like Father Like Son and getting sad big time so dw :)

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #like father like son #lfls #rottmnt lfls #I’m so sad guys #it has to get better #just finished chapter 13 and stooooop #How is Leo even gonna deal with the Green #sighs deeply in turtle fanfic #oh yeah I have been doing art btw I just forgot y’all #I actually have been reading some good ass fics guys #anyways it’s like fucking late goodnight #hhhhh lfls is so good

[aefensteorrra]

went into the city for the first time today and almost cried when I realised I live here now because it’s so beautiful, met some people from my course (we get along v well so far and it’s helpful to know everyone feels nervous and underprepared and homesick), spent hours sat in the park with them and had coffee, overall I felt really positive today but now it’s nighttime I’m just like :( 

#it has to get better #I hope anyway #my flatmates are nice too which is a bonus #also kind of funny observation I made at Aldi #in England signs about produce say 'best of Britain' but here they just say 'best of Scotland' lmaoo

[poptartmochi]

*coughing and spitting blood* the future is going to be better the future is going to be fucking better

#things are much better than before but my life is still. deeply upsetting #it's going to get better some fucking how #i'm just. im tired of being tired and angry and sad and bleak #it has to get better #sriracha.txt

[zenwhoberi]

had the wildest interaction today some random woman called me a slag and my dog a fucking faggot because I was using a pink lead/harness and he’s a boy like what the fuck lmfaoo

#she said he’s going to get sexually confused I said he’s literally a dog I don’t think he’s got anything to be confused about #dkdjdkfkfkf #if I stop posting it’s cause I got jumped by a chain smoking fifty year old woman who has nothing better to do than call random dogs faggots

[laughingcatwrites]

As a reminder that good exists out there, a coworker recently confessed to me that he found out his child is questioning their identity (kid's gender redacted for this post). The kid is keeping it from him, so he can't say anything to them or show that he knows, but he's doing his best to get mentally prepared and educated so that he'll be ready whenever his kid does feel comfortable enough come to him.

For context, this guy is a big, bulky middle aged dude who loves sports and typical outdoor "manly" activities. As his coworker and friend, I know he's a kind and sweet teddy bear of a person, but his kid probably views him as a stern, authoritarian figure, the way most teenagers view their parents. His family lives in a conservative area, so I'm sure between that, their dad's looks and interests, and the fact that their dad is a Figure of Authority, the kid is worried that they won't be accepted.

But you know what? When he found out about his kid, the first thing he did was reach out to his closest queer friend and ask for resources for parents of questioning children. His biggest fears are that his kid will be bullied or discriminated against and won't feel comfortable enough to be themself. His second action was to find himself a mentor in another parent who went the same situation (kid coming out in a conservative town). The other person is preparing him for some of the struggles his kid may face and the fights he may need to take on as a parent to make sure his kid is safe and treated well.

Something I want to emphasize for people focused on language as the primary method of allyship is that when we spoke, he used some outdated terms and thoughts about gender and sexuality. That does not make him bad. These were the terms and thinking used about questioning teenagers when he was growing up and he never needed to learn more current ones. But now that he does have that need, he's throwing himself in head first because that's his kid and he's darn well going to make sure that his kid feels welcomed and has a safe place to be themselves even if they never come out to him.

#I'm so proud and happy for my coworker and I've been trying to figure out how to let him know how amazing I think he is #what gets me the most is that he's keeping this super down low to avoid giving any hints to his kid #he has a lot of queer friends so he already is known as an ally but there's always a chance it will be different if it's family #and he took that chance and crumpled it up into a ball and slam dunked it into the garbage for three points #and decided that even if his kid wants to hide it from him for the rest of his life he will still do what he can to make their life better #pflag #parents doing their best #parenting win #good news #allyship

[uncanny-tranny]

I think so many people are so deeply alienated from themselves that they have no clue how to exercise their free will and autonomy. For some, this alienation runs so deep that they are afraid of their own autonomy and humanity. It is completely understandable why one would have those feelings, but it can be worrisome.

I want to help others who feel this way, so here are small things I have done to exercise my free will:

Add "guilty pleasure" songs to playlists and actually listen to them (I have a ton of late 1990s-early 2000s music I listen to now proudly that I never listened to in the past out of shame)

Getting the décor item, bath set, bed spread, ect. in the patterns you like, even if it's "childish" (I got a dinosaur-themed wastebasket from the kids' décor section and I adore it)

Taking a new route to get to a place you go to often

Eat dessert first

Celebrate well, and often

Collect things that are "odd" or don't seem like an "acceptable" thing to collect (somebody on my "for you" page collects dandelion crayola crayons and it was so cool!!!!!!)

Incorporate one new piece in an outfit you wear frequently (e.g., a new chain, a necklace, ribbons, bracelets, ect.). Challenge yourself to add onto the outfits if you feel up for it.

Sing along to songs without worrying that you sound "good" or your intonation is completely accurate

Read a book from a genre you weren't allowed to read as a kid (comics, thrillers, mysteries, anything!)

Walk without having a specific destination or goal

Pick up a new craft without expecting yourself to master it or to ever be "good" enough. Get your hands messy.

I don't want to shame anybody for not feeling as though they have free will or that they are exempt from exercising it. However, I wanted to give ideas so that you might read this list and find your own ways to express your intrinsic autonomy and will. You deserve to be a person, to feel alive, not just living. That is what our lives are for.

#mental health #mental health support #positivity #if anybody has ideas of their own definitely include them! #i just think being stuck with this feeling that you don't have autonomy and that you ultimately aren't an equal person or a person at all.. #...in comparison to other people can be a really troubling and dangerous place to be in... #...and that isn't the person's fault for feeling that way. they didn't pluck those thoughts out of thin air... #...like i have felt that exact way all my LIFE because i have been abused for. probably 2/3s of my life... #...only within these past few years have i even FELT alive. frankly it's going to take a while to repair what i have been left with... #...so i know the feeling and i want to help others feel even a LITTLE bit alive. you deserve it... #...you deserve to take in a deep breath before slowly realizing 'oh my gd this is what it feels like to be alive' and SMILE about it #i want that for you even if it is brief. even if it is small. even if it is a whisper. i want you to feel alive #unironically getting rid of the idea of 'guilty pleasures' has made my life SO much better

[softhe4rted]

first read on @exitmusicfrafilm’s post about 2023

#so i made this last night :’) #it has stayed with since i first read it….. and it’ll never leave #the wound is not the size of my life #it gets better i know it i know it #reminder !! #hi my post #poetry #digital illustration

[beanghostprincess]

Laios saying he's stronger and better organized than Shuro because he eats 3 meals every day and sleeps properly is probably one of the most encouraging things a fictional character has ever said to me

#no bc i don't i have the words to explain how much i love this #my mental health regarding food has never been more optimistic #like wow are you telling me that eating will actually made me feel ???? good ????? #between this and sanji i might actually get a lil bit better huh #dungeon meshi #laios touden

[twilight-zoned-out]

Some things about Allan:

He’s the only one who reacts to the narrator

He’s the only doll (besides the Weird House) who isn’t swayed in some way by Ken’s takeover

He also declares himself as “Ken's buddy" (making canon his official box description) which makes his inability to be swayed more interesting

He has bendable legs (probably the only reason he tries to jump the fence instead of going around like everyone else)

He easily decked a half-dozen construction Kens and could probably singlehandedly win the Ken fight

He seems to know more about the real world than most Barbies

He knows what NSYNC is 

He knows about other Allan copies living in the real world (I’m trying to figure out if he made this up to convince the humans he can live in the real world, but even if he did, how does he know what NSYNC is???)

There are no other Allan models

#barbie movie #barbie 2023 #barbie #allan barbie #allan appreciation #the other barbies undervalue him but he's kind of OP #if they make a sequel it better be about him #I get why he has his own poster now #he's unappreciated by everyone in Barbie land #he might as well get a poster of appreciation #twilight-zoned-out #barbie movie spoilers #barbie spoilers #I also noticed that during Barbie's big dance celebration he was just there dancing? Did she invite Allan but not Ken? #Or did Allan come with the other Kens and just not join their routine? #just some thoughts

[thebiggestmenace]

it will all get better and I think I'll have a picnic that day

#winter is hard #life is hard #it will get better #it has to get better #rambling menace

[declamationark]

DPxDC prompt: Danny Phantom is an extremely high-level threat due to his capabilities and experience battling against his ghostly enemies. Batman is creating a contingency plan for him and Constantine's advice, as the one who dances the tango with the Infinite Realms? A bone-weary sigh of "plop him down a telly and put on a NASA documentary or something. It's like you haven't been dealing with teen kids for decades now fer fuck's sake."

#danny phantom #danny fenton #dc x dp #dp x dc #dp x dc prompts #batman #john constantine #lowkey but Constantine's been dealing with this snarky teen for a while now #in denial that he's practically Danny's weird uncle and honorary Fenton #Dealer's choice on how they met but I'd like it to be as chaotic as possible #who will win? a british disaster or a schrodinger's american boi #the house of mysteries likes Danny better #they team up to keep Constantine on his toes #Constantine has no qualms using Danny's Obsession to get five minutes of relaxation #and Danny has no qualms bringing up Constantine and Clockworks... #ehem #“history” together

[chloesimaginationthings]

Gregory asks Michael an important FNAF lore question..

#myart #chloesimagination #comic #fnaf vanessa #fnaf vanny #fnaf gregory #michael afton #fnaf #security breach #sister location #fnaf fanart #five nights at freddy's #Vanessa really wants to get on Michael’s good side #all their interactions one on one has been negative #so she hopes today will be better! … she was wrong #Gregory heard her request and respectfully denied it BAHA #Gregory asks THEE most important fnaf lore question.. let the boy cook #Michael doesn’t like to be reminded of that time..

[mienar]

the wandering painter, part one

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#artists on tumblr #illustration #animated illustration #animation #backgrounds #animated gifs #background illustration #myillust #landscape #plants #scenery #summer #hiii! just wanted to share an artwork i made that's super fresh from the oven ksfknsf #'the wandering painter' will be a series that consists of artworks that has elements that i struggle to draw and am trying to improve on! #ive always really struggled with the process of painting (for example) clouds fields grass grasslands flowers etc #despite the end result coming out satisfactory imo but i cant deny that it most of the time feels like a fluke #so this series would consist of my journey of improving how to draw said elements/areas more confidently :D #this artwork in particular - i studied and practiced how to paint/draw silver grass better along with grasses and clouds #i feel like im sorta getting the hang of it but theres definitely room to study and experiment how i can paint it better #so yeah! nonetheless i really hope you'll like this! and i hope you'll have a lovely day/night ahead <3333

[dudedidujust]

Au where Damian comes to Gotham with the goal of infiltrating and eventually overthrowing Batman instead of inheriting the mantle. Not much changes from canon except for the fact that he views everything that batman owns as his. That's his future cave and his future batmobile. This also includes his robins. After all everyone knows Batman wouldn't really be Batman without them.

Cue a very bewildered Tim being lectured on his eating habits by a righteous Damian who won't let one of his people take shortcuts with their health.

#Damian looking at the manor: its free real estate #he almost writes off red hood but after finding out his identity he switches to trying to lure him yo his side #jason gets the head of a random thug who was bothering him on his doorstep #damian: im gonna be a better batman than batman. I'll sway all his allies to my side and then there'll be no complaints when i take over #everyone else: he's such a sweet kid. sorta prickly but he has a good heart ❤️ #damian wayne #batman #batfam #bruce wayne #tim drake #jason todd #they all thinks he's trying so hard to be accepted into the fam when infact he's trying to get to the top

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[canisalbus]

✦ Milk and Honey ✦

#I've been going through some of the pieces from the past few months #the oldest of these are from... late may early july I think? felt like making a little compilation to get a better overall picture #fixation has been strong this is just a fraction of them all #gay catholic dog era #own art #own characters #CanisAlbus #art #artists on tumblr #Vasco #Machete #anthro #sighthound #dogs #canine #animals #I think my personal favorites this far are the body heat piece and the bathtub scene #but their composition didn't work with this format so I left them out