#is it going to be horrible since i haven't actually written anything in what feels like a whole year???

[justlightlysedated]

Just when I think I'm over this I see a gifset of teenage malex and go, THEY MADE SOME GOOD POINTS

#teenage malex is the only rnm thing that i claimed in the divorce and i would still die for them #does this mean im at this moment trying to write a teen malex au?? #....maybe #is it going to be horrible since i haven't actually written anything in what feels like a whole year??? #most likely

[the-modern-typewriter]

Hello this is a question that came about from watching the new Fallout TV show and a character named Maximus. He’s a relatively neutral character and his arc is very wonderful coming from a writer and big book reader but I noticed that the average viewer doesn’t understand his character and actually hates him… my question is as an author is it okay to make your story more digestible to people who lack perception since it’s the general audience for mainstream media and how do you do that without losing your story? Idk this was probably too complex and a stupid question 💔

Not a stupid question! There are no stupid questions.

Going to unpack this a bit though. (I haven't seen the show.) First some general points, but then some advice on balancing complexity in a story.

So. Some things to get out of the way:

You don't know what the average viewer is thinking. Just because their opinion on a character is different to yours, doesn't mean they lack perception. Do we sometimes have an issue with critical thinking in the modern age? Yes. But we also live in an age where people bring a vast array of different insights and experiences into the stories they read/watch. 99% of the time a story doesn't have just one right interpretation, especially if it is a more complex narrative.

You CAN try to write a story that is more digestible to a general audience, but if you do have concerns about the media literacy of the general population, focusing on providing unchallenging stories is not the fix to that. People learn through engaging with interesting work and having discussions about them - e.g. when they are given the opportunity to. Perception, like anything, is a skill trained with practice. No one's born with it. There's no inherent us/them that can't be changed.

Will you be happy and fulfilled as a writer writing stories that you feel are dumbed or watered down? I know I wouldn't end up writing the versions of stories that I want. Similarly, you probably won't then attract the readers/audience that most resonate with your ideas, because you don't give them the chance.

Generally speaking, people hate being talked down to. As a reader/lover of stories, if I thought a writer was talking down to me and thought I was an idiot who couldn't understand the themes/plot, I wouldn't want to have anything to do with their stuff. It's a horrible feeling, isn't it? It's like being written off before you even leave the gate.

Okay, now some advice: Amazing children's books are a great example of stories that are simplified to appeal and meet the audience where they are at, without losing the richness that makes them resonate and engage readers/audience. However, there are adult examples too. They share some qualities.

These often have:

Clear structure (there are a myriad story structures that you can use to make a story hit beats the reader expects and create a sense of satisfaction, while still giving you room to play.)

High concept story idea/plot (so, stories that can be explained/pitched in a line. E.g. children are forced to fight in televised death matches (Hunger Games), a famous author is imprisoned by a dangerous fan who doesn't approve of his new work (Misery), 'it's jaws in outer space!'). These stories have simple premises that often have wide-appeal, but the stories themselves can be complex.

Engaging main character(s) with a clear goal/agenda. They don't have to all be morally pure, but for an easy win, your character should be likeable/easy to root for. In a children's book, e.g. at the simplest level, these are often also high concept. (E.g. a mouse wants to be heard so is convinced it needs a lion's roar to be loved - The Lion Inside by Rachel Bright)

There are, of course, exceptions to every rule. Game of Thrones was phenomenally popular, for example, but I don't think it's an easy to sink into world/simple set of characters.

Watering down an existing story to fit a different target audience is often not going to lead you to write the best story. This is because it's like trying to fit a triangle into a circle, or make a banana bread into a savoury scone. However, there are plenty of stories with mass-appeal that offer readers a variety of different levels to engage with them, so it is very possible to write a brilliant story with mass appeal. But you work from the foundations up, not from the finished product down.

I hope this helps!

#writing advice #writing talk #writing tips #creative writing #fiction writing #writing #on writing

[mixelation]

thoughts on itadei, itakisa, and itasaku? and i guess any other popular itachi ships that are not currently coming to mind for me lol

ItaDei

Love it. Have written tens of thousands of words about it. It's sort of a frustrating ship to write because they're both assholes about their own feelings (and I don't think Itachi in canon... has a lot of thoughts on Deidara), but Deidara has an extremely canonical gay melt down over Itachi, so I feel like there's a lot of ridiculousness to explore. The fact that they're both criminal villain ninja means there's a lot of room for understanding that other ships might not have. Yes, Deidara blows buildings up with people inside, what of it? He's not like "ooh aah you monster!!" over the Uchiha Massacre. And I like that they both have wildly different, but demonstrably lethal/successful, attitudes towards problem solving. Like I think they cover a lot of each other's flaws while also making each other worse, you know?

Since it's "brutally honest" opinion time, I will add a complaint I haven't made in a while. I hate the way a good chunk of fandom writes Deidara in mlm ships. For some reason, people like to make him a naive uwu bean to play the "feminine" role. Stop that, it's boring and OOC.

ItaKisa

This is a ship I don't really mind but also don't find super compelling. I'm not a big Kisame fan-- like he's fine, I like writing and reading about him fine-- but he's not one of my favorite Akatsuki members. I don't filter on ItaKisa but the tag won't make me NOT click a fic. I could be compelled to write it if I had an idea for it. I do prefer exploring their relationship from a more platonic angle. Kisame is most interesting to me when he's the guy dealing with Itachi's bullshit 24/7 and somehow still thriving.

ItaSaku

My original OTP!!!!!! Okay so I think they're super compatible and HERE'S WHY--

Basically I think Itachi is someone who has idealized romance in a way where he has an extensive very bland fantasy about nice Konoha girls who let him have the most bland vanilla hetersosexual marriage of all time. He wants the culturally appropriate equivalent of a white picket fence. Would he actually be happy with this? No, obviously not, but Itachi also thinks he's a pacifist.

Meanwhile Sakura is a violent maniac who is trying her hardest to BE that nice Konoha girl. They indulge each other's insane fantasies about it. Itachi looks at Sakura and is like: "oh yes, the perfect Konoha kunoichi, the student of the Hokage and Hatake Kakashi, a healer with the face of an angel--" But if his ability for self-analysis were 2% better he would realize his favorite Sakura moments are all like "ripped a man in half" and "brought that same man back from the brink of death to interrogate him." He is ready to lay back and let Sakura live out her own fantasy of Fixing the tragic S-ranked missing-nin WITH HER LOVE because that is also what Itachi wants. Ignore that the village is on fire, please

Other Itachi Ships

Let's see.... every once in a while I get intrigued by the idea of Kakashi/Itachi, but I have never hit on anything there that I really like. I'm fine with Shisui/Itachi, but I don't think Shisui has enough of a canon presence for me to go really feral over it like I would ItaSaku or ItaDei. I'm intrigued by some other Itachi/Akatsuki ships although I don't think any of them are popular. For example, I think Itachi and Sasori would clash horribly in that they're both assholes in similar directions, and this would make SasoItaDei a beautiful trashfire for Deidara specifically.

I've written some Itachi-Karin interactions that I thought were fun so I think ItaKarin could be interesting. Ummm..... OH! I regularly forget Izumi even exists. Sorry, Izumi.

#ask meme answer

[yuri-is-online]

If the 500 followers event is still open, would be alright to ask for prompt 15 with Ortho? Platonic obviously! I just think the robot boy deserves some more love. Thanks! <3

15. Formal balls weren't a thing in your world so you have been hiding in this strategically chosen corner to avoiding having to step on anyone's toes. Unfortunately someone really, really, REALLY, wants to dance with you and has managed to track you down AGAIN.

I was surprised to get Ortho requests this event since I haven't exactly written anything specifically dedicated to him but he is such a good character. He deserves all the love and friendship in the world, and this prompt suits him well given how he acts with Idia.

notes: they/them used for Yuu, Ortho is meant to be post Ch. 6, Yuu is sort of an introvert and a bit self depreciating, that's ok Ortho is here to give some encouragement! The other event requests can be found on my masterlist here.

This had been a mistake.

As much as you liked looking out on the fantastic scenery in front of you, it is all extremely overwhelming. Almost like it's wasted on you, the magical scenery is simultaneously completely comprehensible and extremely unnatural. You've seen pictures of Masquerade balls, seen them used in anime, listened to songs, and thought long and hard about just what it was you would do if you ever magically got invited to one. And now that you actually have been you are faced with the grim reality that no, just because everyone is wearing a mask that doesn't mean that you will suddenly overcome your distaste for crowds or figure out how to dance.

"Yuu!" Now if only you could make a certain someone agree. "There you are! You're getting better at this hiding thing." Ortho floats to keep himself at eye level with you, cheeky toothy smile freed for the special occasion.

"Really?" You groan, maybe you can bargain your way out of this one.

"Ha ha no." Ortho laughs, moving to cut you off from your exit and repeats the same question that's been haunting you all night. "Please dance with me Prefect! It'll be a bunch of fun."

"Don't wanna." You huff in an all too familiar way to Ortho, but he is surprised to find himself at a bit of a loss. Idia is Idia, and you are Yuu, his data is lacking on what to suggest to get you to agree to his request. It's a bit exciting actually, like playing an RPG blind and still trying to get a good end with your favorite companion.

[Ortho: Persuasion] "But I really want to dance with you, Prefect." He makes sure to sag his joints just enough to invoke sympathy without seeming like he is about to throw a tantrum. It seems to sort of work, but not in the way he really wants it to. You just look like you feel horrible for disappointing him and uncomfortable.

"I'm really sorry Ortho." you try to keep your breathing steady, flustered between seriously considering his request (there's no pressure if you are just dancing with a friend, right?) and still trying to plan your out. "But I am just not good at formal stuff like this at all, we don't have big parties like this in my world anymore. And even when there were dances in my world it's not like I ever got invites to any of them." Maybe that's the real reason you don't want to go out onto the floor, not that you can't dance. Deuce certainly isn't able to do things properly no matter how hard he is trying, and Ace is not even doing that. But you still don't quite feel like you... belong here, not after how big of a deal Crowley made out of your invitation being something he was "obliged" to give. "And I don't even know how to dance! I'll just step on everyone's feet and make things awkward."

"Hm, well then that's all the more reason for you to dance with me!" Ortho is... laughing? Not in a mean spirited way, but kindly. It's a soothing tone somehow, and as he mock bows you don't feel like he is intending on making you the butt of a joke at all. "I don't have any toes for you to step on, and if anyone you are uncomfortable with tries to make you dance I can just blow them up with my lasers."

"Uh maybe don't do that?" You gingerly take his hand and let the floating boy spin you around in a dance that's more similar to two children on a playground than a proper ballroom sway, but between just how happy he is and how quickly your other friends join in you cannot bring yourself to remain embarrassed for long.

"That's right prefect," Ortho whispers when he notices you have finally calmed down, "you aren't in your world anymore. And sometimes that probably sucks but tonight? It means that you are very much invited to the ball. Awesome right?!" He means that last bit about himself as much as he does you, you suppose but that doesn't make it any less true. Tonight, you are very much exactly welcome and where everyone wants you to be.

#twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #ortho shroud #twst yuu #500 followers celebration #i think ortho would pack bond with introvert yuu really fast #“oh i have one of these already!” #“i know exactly what to do!” #like they're a pokemon card or something #anyway idk if this was any good it's kinda short too but i promise i love ortho so much ;-;

[olderthannetfic]

I've just read an article (in Gazeta Wyborcza) about a very popular series of books among young teens in my country, Poland, called "Rodzina Monet" (Family Monet). The author gained popularity while publishing on Wattpad lol. The article basically said that it's problematic because these books are read by young girls, even 10 years old, and it glorifies violence. Plus it just isn't well written - there were some fragments in the article and yeah it's not well written lmao. A woman in the comments said that her daughter is reading this book and asked if she should forbid it. Since no one answered her, I replied that I don't think forbidding the book is a good solution and suggested talking to her daughter about it, showing her the article and asking what she thinks about it. But I don't know anything more about that situation, for example how old the daughter is. I don't think I'd worry if my child were to read this book, I read trashy stuff too. But I started wondering if maybe there should be some control in such a case? The thing with the books from what I gathered (I haven't read them) is that they are about a 14yo girl, who suddenly lost her mother and grandmother, is sent away to US from Britain where she starts living with her 28yo (handsome) stepbrother and his 3 (also handsome) brothers. She lives in a beautiful villa since the stepbrother is super rich. He's also cold and distant and doesn't understand that she has issues with food (she has some kind of eating disorder). Some of the things he and his 3 brothers do can be described as domestic violence but they apologize, buy her expensive stuff and are all adult handsome men. Yeah it's a young adult fiction. The thing is that it's just not well written so none of the bad behaviours is commented upon.

--

Sounds like typical godawful id trash that people eat up. Making a rule against it will just make it more tantalizing.

It would be far more valuable to kick any worthless partners out of one's life and demonstrate not putting up with shit to a tween girl than to ban her from reading trashy books.

One could always try buying her something better, but IME, people who try that always do it wrong: they buy books that are better written, yes, but the vocabulary and sentence structure are a thousand times harder, there's zero iddy wish fulfillment, and the plot is something fucking depressing and supposedly edifying.

Readers can smell a tryhard "your taste is bad" gift a mile away.

I think it's also important when trying to find replacement trash to understand what the kink actually is. Why is it age gap? Well, have you seen 14-year-olds? They're awkward and covered in zits. Of course the protagonist is young like the readers and the hotties are older.

More importantly, why is it abusive? Absolute idiots will be like "Because society taught girls wah wah wah wah wah", but the actual reason is obvious if you've read trash romance for adults:

It's so the love interest(s) can be in the wrong.

The self inserty protagonist of this type of story has very little power. Not only is she usually younger, but she's poorer, a fish out of water in a new situation, etc. The way she gets power is by the love interest doing something absolutely horrible, realizing they have erred, and then groveling forever. Their guilt is an effective way to manipulate them. And yes, retail therapy is usually the next step from this particular trash classic all the way back to The Flame and the Flower.

You can try giving a teen girl a book about a teen girl action hero who is awesome and whose love interest likes her because of that... But if the reader doesn't feel awesome, she's still going to prefer a book about a loser with a destined, fated love or a misunderstood woobie whom other characters have to grovel to after not initially realizing she was special.

You can't fix self esteem by handing someone a book they don't identify with and telling them their id is wrong. And if self esteem does improve, that doesn't mean the lizard brain is going to switch trash fiction tastes anyway.

One can try leaving other fun books around, but that's about the most that could be helpful.

[acourtofthought]

I hate to admit this shit, but in view of the time when the Elain and Lucien story is being dragged along, and all of Azriel's openness in these last books... don't you think Sarah might be making this horrible thing happen?

I have a million reasons to believe in Az+Gwyn and Lucien+Elain, but I can't trust Sarah J Maas...

All these ships are possibilities after all.

Everything is a possibility until the book is written and released.

But usually SJM does not have two characters fall for one another in someone else's book while they are still mending a broken heart from a past relationship / love interest, not if those two characters are getting a book of their own.

I can't think of a single standalone dual pov book where it started off with the MMC and the FMC having already developed feelings for one another, having shared glances and a near kiss. Unless it was a second chance romance situation and those usually occur years after the fact.

Romance books usually involve two people who haven't met, two people who have met while it appears one despises the other, where it appears they both despise one another, where one friend is oblivious to their other friend having a crush on them.

While she absolutely could start the next ACOTAR book with Elain and Az both in love and wanting to be together, I don't see examples of this being how she writes her pairings, not ones getting their own standalone book.

As far as Elain and Lucien's story being dragged along.....it's been a long time coming of course....but has it been dragged along any more than it's needed to be in terms of what makes sense for the story?

Feyre got the first trilogy so it's pretty evident why Elain and Lucien didn't end up together there. I mean, Elain was still in love with Graysen in ACOWAR.

Nesta and Cassian met halfway through ACOMAF. Their bond was hinted at in his bonus, halfway through ACOMAF.

Nessian was the first plane to line up on the runway.

Elucien was mated at the end of ACOMAF.

Theirs was the second plane to line up on the runway.

Considering Nessian met first and Cassian was drawn to Nesta first and Elain's heart was spoken for when her bond with Lucien snapped, then doesn't it make sense that Nessian would be given the first spin-off since the introduction of their story did come before that of Elucien?

Doesn't it make sense that Nesta's story needed to come first because part of the sisters arc has been Nesta being overprotective of Elain and her needing to let go of her hold to find out who she was outside of her? Doesn't it make sense, as we were told "perhaps she was worried about disappointing you all" that Elain would not be ready to stand up for herself, consider leaving the NC or even get to know Lucien when she knew Nesta was struggling and had animosity towards him?

But Nesta left SF in a much better place (though I imagine it's still going to be an adjustment for her when Elain actually does leave the Night Court for good. It's the equivalent of a parent accepting their child is now an adult at 18 while living under their roof but still finding it hard to set them free when they head off to college).

Elucien's has been a long time coming in the real world as they were mated in 2016 but on their timeline, their journey so far has made sense. She was still mourning the loss of Graysen and her father in ACOFAS, she was still adjusting to becoming fae and losing her human life. And just as Nesta pushed Cassian away before her book, it makes sense that SJM has written a similar setup in Elain and Lucien, where it seemed there was hope for them at the end of the third book but there's not been a regression.

However, there is no longer anything preventing their story from moving forward.

Nesta has her mate and is no longer spiraling.

Nesta no longer hates Lucien the way she once seemed to.

Elain is no longer pining for Graysen.

Elain no longer seems to be as weighted down by the thought of disappointing them and is fighting back.

Elain is now offering to get her hands dirty and tackle the dangerous things.

I know some people point out that SJM isn't great at planning things out, that certain things are forgotten or dropped from storyline to storyline but I think her overall vision for the sisters journey is playing out exactly as she imagined it from the time their mates came onto the page in book 2.

She said she had been thinking about where she wanted them to go early on and has dropped seeds for them in every single book since.

Aside from her crush on Az, all Elain's plot related seeds and compatibility have been pointing in the direction of Lucien and I think we're about to see their story finally get the resolution it deserves. Because it is their story. No matter what E/riels think, the question has always been about the Elucien bond that Elain and Lucien share together.

Saying SJM loves her FMC more than her MMC seems to be forgetting how she's constantly gushing about Rowan, Rhys, etc. and is a strong indication that she's not setting any of them for disappointment. When she has written Lucien into every single book of the ACOTAR series and that cannot be said of Az. Feyre does share a friendship with Az but it was not half as developed as what she shared with Lucien and there is no reason to think Lucien is ending up as anything but her brother-in-law.

And there is no reason to think that her two remaining MMC leads would be walking away with anything but a happy mating bond.

#elucien #pro elucien #elain archeron #lucien vanserra #anti e/riel #pro lucien vanserra #elain x lucien #lucien and elain #pro elain archeron #elain and lucien #elucien supremacy #acotar series

[lunargrapejuice]

an unexpected surprise

kaeya alberich x pregnant!reader | 2.2k+ words

warnings: telling kaeya you’re pregnant, hurt/comfort- emphasis on comfort, unplanned pregnancy, a brotherly bond i cannot live without. i haven't written in a while so sorry if this is trash. i hope you're all doing well <3 update on me, kaeya is all i can think about

outside the window of the infirmary is a lovely summer day. bright green leaves scratch against the stone walls, the rays of light peeking through the trees warm your face and exposed arm and warm wind blows, bringing with it the scent of blooming flowers. you wonder if kaeya can smell them too from his office window and you certainly hope he’s having a better day than you are.

after throwing up not once but three times in the early morning right after your beloved left for work the horrible nausea creeped back in just as you were departing for a commission. the lake outside the walls of mond being the luckily recipient of your thrown up breakfast. knowing who your husband was and what he would have to say if you worked while sick, you decided it was for the best that your team go without you and headed straight for the infirmary. 

this isn’t the first day you’ve felt sick but it is the first time it’s gotten the better of you since it began. you assumed it would go away, that you ate something your stomach didn’t agree with and just needed a day or two to shake it off but much to your disliking it has only gotten worse.

you wait anxiously, impatiently, for some test results to come back, your foot bouncing up and down as you try to distract yourself with the scenery outside and not on the one particular scenario gnawing at the back of your mind. but it’s impossible to ignore when the nurse walks in with a giddy smile on her face and eagerly hands you your paperwork. you stand as you read through the pages of tests until your eyes land on the one you can’t believe is positive. 

pregnancy test - positive

tears brim your eyes as you reread it over and over again.  pregnant.. you and kaeya were going to have a baby.. a mix of happiness and anxiousness clings to every water droplet that slides down your warm cheeks, a million questions running through your head about the life growing inside of you. 

were you really ready for this? you smile, supposing it's too late to be asking a question like that and with kaeya by your side you’d be able to face anything.

would you be a good mother? 

what kind of person would they grow to be?

would they look more like you or more like kaeya or a mix of you both?

kaeya.. when were you going to tell him.. how were you to get the words out not knowing how he’d feel about this.. 

the conversation of having a family hasn’t come up much, mostly because the first few times it did he seemed.. hesitant, not ready and you of all people understand and wanted to give him all the time he needed. he hasn’t voiced his fears out loud, if there were actually any fears at all, but he was never good at showing the weak side of him, no matter how many times you told him fear doesn’t make anyone weak. 

of course being a parent is scary and as much as you hate to admit it, telling kaeya has you just as anxious but just as you would motherhood, you would do your best in giving it your all.

the clock ticks by ever so slowly on the wall in front of you as you sit on the couch and await your beloved's arrival home. it’s no surprise he's running a bit late but every minute that goes by with this news weighing on your chest feels like an hour and your anxiousness only grows more. you wonder if you should have gone straight to his office to tell him instead of waiting till he comes home, if it would have given your thoughts less time to spiral out of control.

you do your best to breathe knowing your stress wouldn’t help the baby at all. to pass the time you think about the good things that will come of this and fill your mind with moments you can’t wait to share with your little one and kaeya. everything would be okay, you repeat over and over. you keep reminding yourself there was nothing you and kaeya couldn’t get through together.

you're brought from your thoughts and to your feet, all but jumping out of your skin, when the front door swings open and the strong scent of ink mixed with kaeyas scent fills your senses, different shades of blue and a sparkling smile steal your eyes. 

“i’m h-” kaeya cuts himself off when he sees the look on your face. “gave you quite the fright, didn’t i doll?” he takes a few steps in, shutting the door behind him but not bothering to take off his boots. “come here, i’ll kiss you better,” he flirts and holds out a gloved hand for you to grab onto.

his fingers are cool against your sweaty palms and you hope he doesn’t notice but your nervousness makes it hard to match his smile, no matter how hard you try, no matter how much you actually do want to smile over this news. 

“kaeya..” you stand a few steps away from him, staring at where your hands are joined. “i have something..” you squeeze his fingers tighter, wondering what expression he’s wearing right now, questioning if now is even the best time to tell him. you needed to get it out now, before your worries fester even more. mustering all the courage you can, you take a breath, just say it. “i’m pregnant.”

every moment following those two words never seem to end and you hate your mind for making you watch this all in slow motion. a slow and painful loss, you watch as his fingers slip for yours, feel your heart ache as you look up to see if maybe his eyes would tell you what his words are not but instead you only catch the back of his coat and the ends of his hair before he disappears from view and leaves you standing alone, the summer wind blowing through the open door whistling behind him.

the door to angels share has never felt so heavy but that wouldn’t stop kaeya from coming in. he thanks the archons the bar is empty aside from a few people upstairs and heads straight for the bar, though not for the reason you’d expect.

he still orders a drink, sipping the dark red liquid as he tries to find the words to speak out loud in hopes perhaps saying it to diluc will take the fear out of him, bring his senses back because right now the only thing he can picture is a terrible fate for the two things in this world that hold his heart. a fate that he brought upon you and your child, a fate that kaeya is yet to know the end of but could have helped you avoid if he had just reminded himself a little more that he did not deserve what you offered him.. not your kindness, not your heart and for archons sake, least of all a child.. another person he might let down.. might not be able to protect when his past -

the muscles of his chest feel like their trying to suffocate him, his lies were wrapping around his ankles like thorny tendrils, pulling him into an abyss where the only sound was his fathers voice and the only thing within him was the same confused and lonely feelings of the day he was left at the dawn winery and all the years that followed after telling diluc the truth. but like crepus’ voice had brought him back then, dilucs does so now.

“kaeya.” dilucs voice tears him from his thoughts and he’s beyond thankful for it. but he doesn’t hear the rest of the words his brother says as he chugs the last of his glass and he hates how bitter it tastes.

even with how heavy the weight on his chest is, the corners of his mouth tug into a smile as he finally says the words out loud. “y/n’s pregnant.”

not much more is shared between the brothers for several moments following the truth being spoken. diluc, while genuinely happy, is shocked and still trying to read kaeyas face. it’s been a long time since hes seen kaeya show such raw emotion but there was no doubt worry is coursing through him. pouring him another drink in silence, diluc collects his thoughts and a few moments later makes his way around the bar, not meeting kaeyas eye as he takes the seat next to him. 

“i’m sure the last thing father expected was to raise two boys by himself,” he starts, crossing his arms. if kaeya didn’t know any better, he’d say based on his visage diluc was reminiscing about the old days. diluc lets out a breathy chuckle before continuing. “we were more than he bargained for some days.. it mustn't have been easy but he did what he could for us.. if he were here now i think he’d say ‘sometimes the best things come as a surprise,’” he sides eye kaeya knowingly. “‘all you can do is try your best for your children.’ i believe that's what he did for us and i have no doubts you will also do your best for your child.” after a pause diluc stands, placing his warm hand on kaeyas shoulder. “it’ll be okay.”

kaeya's world seems to brighten a bit after that, the liquid in his drink sparkling and tasting sweet once more. “you know i’m the one becoming an actual father but you are the one sounding rather fatherly right now.”

still bubbling with worry, kaeya makes his way back home walking with haste and confidence. his worry this time around is not all that of becoming a father but rather the fact he left you alone after you nervously shared the news. how hurt and confused you must be..

with more force than he intended he throws open the door and there you are, sitting on the couch he had left you by, crying into the decorative pillow. before the door can shut he’s in front of you, gingerly his hands brush against your legs to allow him space between them.

“k-kae..” you cry quietly as he removes the pillow and you’re met with both eyes of the man you love, his chilled hands coming to wipe the tears from your wet face. hardly ever do you get to see both of his eyes and as much as he disliked the one he normally covered you loved it, because it was a part of him.

a strong and gentle grip pulls you from the back of the couch and into kaeyas warm embrace. “i’m so sorry y/n..” he soothes you quietly, one hand tangling in your hair to pull you even closer. his breath is cold against the side of your face but his silent tears dripping onto your collar bone are warm. a part of you wants to pull away, to try to see if these are sad or happy tears but you don’t want to be away from him and it seems he feels the same as his grip on you tightens. 

his words flow like snow, pure, honest, blanketing you with the crystalline beauty of kaeyas true emotions, even the ones he hated to show. he shared his fears as he held you close, opening up to you more than he ever had before about what lay behind his heart and worried mind. you both smiled and shared countless kisses when he told you that his fears fail to come close in comparison to the happiness he feels and his eyes, his smile told you how true all his words were. he promised he would never again leave your side. 

still on his knees between your legs, kaeya helps you get comfortable while peppering your face with kisses, soft, warm lips finding their way down your neck and chest, all the way to your stomach. “i would do anything for you both,” he whispers against your wrinkled shirt but loud enough for you to hear. “nothing in this world matters to me more than you girls do.”

“girls?” you question with a giggle, the tips of your fingers tracing his hairline, slowly making their way down to his lips. “how do you know the babies a girl, hm?”

his hand finds yours, keeping your fingers pressed to his lips, kissing each other lovingly, if not a bit teasingly too. “you should know me by now darling, i know all.”

you roll your eyes and smile brightly down at him; he looks euphoric and beautiful, like nothing in this whole world could stop the snow fall of his love that surrounded you and always would.

suddenly and steadily you’re lifted from the couch, kaeyas strong arms holding you against his chest. you don’t waste any time wrapping your arms around his neck and nuzzling into him, letting soft blue hairs tickle your nose.

“where are we going?” you ask, not caring where the destination actually was. as long as he was there, you wanted to be there too.

“to celebrate properly,” you can hear the smirk behind his words and moments later you’re placed on top of the bed with kaeya hovering above you. he leans down to kiss you, smiling oh so lovingly before your lips touch and with every passing moment, every kiss shared, your worries melt away and you’re reminded you and kaeya would always get through anything, together.

genshin impact masterlist | main masterlist

#does this mean my writers block is over 😭 #genshin impact #kaeya alberich x reader #genshin impact x reader #kaeya x reader #kaeya alberich #genshin x reader #genshin impact fluff #kaeya

[chenfordspiral]

43, 44, 45, 48, 49, 50

43. If you take/write prompts: what’s your favorite prompt fic that you’ve written? Mh, probably the two I got that turned into this 4x18 AU. It’s honestly one of my favorites I’ve written, and interestingly enough, when I reread it a while back, it felt so foreign because I could barely remember even writing it. But that was fun because it was like I was reading it from an “outsider” POV, if that makes sense. There's two more that I love, as said here, but for once I made a decision and will stick with it. @escapismqueen could fill a book about me and my indecisiveness, and I hope she's proud of me for choosing only one here.

44. If you take/write prompts: do you prefer dialogue or scenario/narrative prompts? Mh, I don’t think I’ve actually gotten many dialogue ones yet, at least not ones that I can remember right off the bat so I’ll say scenario/narrative prompts. 

45. What’s something you’ve improved on since you started writing fic? Oy, this is tough because it often feels like I haven't improved at all? I do like to think I've broadened my vocabulary (also thanks to reading so many fics), but I'm not sure if that makes it onto the page. Maybe I'm less terrified of hitting that post button now than I was a year ago and trust myself more to pull something off that maybe I would've shied away from before. The better question for me would be "what have you not improved on?" lol

48. What’s the last fic you read? Do you recommend it? I can honestly say that I don’t know the last one I read, it’s been that long. I’ve got about – and no, I’m not joking – 200 AO3 tabs open on my phone with fics I want to read or need to catch up on. Wait! I do know which one! I re-read this one here from Tara because it was the first that came to mind for the chenford fanfic quotes blog. And yes, I absolutely, 100000% recommend it!!! 

49. What are you currently working on? Share a few lines if you’re up for it! Already answered here, but: aside from Little bit of Love, I’m also always (and by that I mean every day) trying to weave my way through an AU that I’ve been working on for… welp, almost a year. Here’s a tiny little sneak peek from what will likely be the first or second chapter. It’s still a long, loooong way from seeing the light of day, though. 

“Geez, Tim. Way to be positive,” Angela sighs. “She won’t like you a whole lot either with that attitude.”  “Great, so case closed. We’re not doing this,” he says and starts to get up from his place opposite of her. “Tim,” she whines and grabs a hold of his arm to keep him from leaving. “Come on. What could it hurt? Just one date. You can see how it goes, and if it’s absolutely horrible and you sit there in silence for two hours, you can go home and call and yell at me for being wrong.”  “Lopez.” “Timothy.” “Stop calling me that.”  “Stop being stubborn.”

Oops, forgot 50 🤦🏼‍♀️ 50. Answer any question of your choice, or talk about anything you want to talk about! All I can say is that I love this amazing community on here. The last few months in particular have been so much fun, and I love engaging with you all here. It genuinely feels like a home and I'm so grateful to get to be a part of it.

Thank youuu 🫶🏻

#asked and answered #ask games #thisnightissparkling089

[bookaddict24-7]

REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

Books I’ve read so far in 2023!

Friend me on Goodreads here to follow my more up to date reading journey for the year!

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204. The Parasite by Richard Paul Evans--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I can't believe we get more MICHAEL VEY stories! I was in love with this series when I did my re-read and I didn't know we were going to get a sequel series with them being in College until I saw this one pop up at work last year. Although it's a wholly new adventure, the suspense and fun is just the same.

Although it reads more like YA like the other books in the series, the characters are definitely older (wouldn't be surprised in they're at least 20). I liked this side of it because it felt more proportional with the violence they experience.

I also mainly loved reading this book because while it was fun, we got to have the opportunity to see how the characters were doing beyond the initial series, which is something so rare. AND it is a great story, too, it's not some sad attempt at writing yet another MICHAEL VEY story.

The team goes back to the site of one of the places that started it all because one of their old teammates has gone missing there, and two other have been abducted. It was nonstop action and intrigued.

If you haven't read this series, I highly recommend it. I think it's good for any ages because it's just pure fun. (My review rambles because I don't want to spoil anything LOL).

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205. The Traitor by Richard Paul Evans--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

The way I always devour these books. Since I waited to read the last book in this series, I was able to read this one immediately after.

I loved the twists and turns, and the constant adventure. I also almost cried during this one because it feels like the impossible has happened near the end of this book. I'm not going to say much because of spoilers, but I'm left with questions and I'm eagerly waiting for the next book, since this one left off on a cliffhanger!

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206. Come With Me by Ronald Malfi--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I've been meaning to read a Ronald Malfi novel because I came across a couple of his short story collections that looked really good to me. I wanted to see if I vibed with his writing and while it took me a little bit to get into it, I think I'm going to enjoy his stuff.

COME WITH ME dealt with not only a chilling mystery to be solved after the tragic killing of the MC's wife, but also the shadows of grief that haunt us when we're stuck in that immediate loop of not being able to cope with the new reality that loss paints for us. We see the personification of this grief in Malfi's novel as the MC struggles to find the answers his late wife had secretly been hunting for while she was alive.

This is definitely one of those horror books that masquerade as a ghost story, but is actually a tale of human-created horror and the haunting of grief. The actions of several people, including police officers, is another one of the chilling topics brought into focus in COME WITH ME.

It took me a while to get into the book because the first few parts are about the MC's reality shifting and in retrospect, I think that it was a very necessary introduction. We are being brought into the MC's very real horror story and then we start exploring the true crime aspect of this book.

I think what made this book all the more compelling was how consistent Malfi was throughout the story when it comes to grief and the horrible things humans do to one another. Even the ending was a jarring reminder of this.

COME WITH ME leaves you with questions like "Why?" and "What now?" and I have zero regrets about finally reading this book. I've read a lot of iterations of grief and how it can be explored in fiction. I think Malfi does a great job and I'm excited to read more of his work!

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207. Hello Stranger by Katherine Center--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I'm a huge fan of Katherine Center. I've enjoyed pretty much every book she's ever written and that hasn't changed at all after reading this new one!

HELLO STRANGER was such a cute and unique story following a woman who loses her ability to recognize faces after a life-saving brain surgery. She's an artist and while she's struggling with her new (and potentially temporary) reality, she grows closer to the resident playboy (or is he?)

I loved seeing their banter, her hilarious take on certain situations, and how obvious the conflict was--but in the funniest way possible. This was truly such a sunlight of a book during the scariest of months.

Center's writing is always such a joy and HELLO STRANGER is perfect proof of that. It's not smutty, so know that, but it does focus on a classic and fun will they/won't they romance between two enemies (maybe?). If you like stories that feature a guy who falls first, but let's the FMC do her enemies bit, then you're going to really enjoy this.

Also, much like Center's other books, the MC also has a complex storyline. Her complicated relationship with her family, the grief that has helped shape her as an artist, and her need to be the best friend possible make her a fun narrator for HELLO STRANGER.

Add this one to your TBR if you want a fun romantic comedy with a little puppy, an evil stepsister, and a sexy man who just wants to be helpful.

___

208. The Fate of Ten by Pittacus Lore--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Well, that ending was...I'm very glad I'm reading these years after they've all been released. I don't know if I'd be able to handle having to wait a year for the the final book after that ending.

Much like the rest of this series, this was a fantastic book. Will always be a fan of how the characters have grown so much and the complex relationships between all of them. They all work off each other so, so well.

I liked the twists and there were definitely moments where I thought the storyline was getting really cool. Not going to lie, series like this one make me feel like a kid again. The fun of them, the emotional weight of them, and the "will they actually succeed?" urgency of these stories hook me every time.

I can't say too much because they're super easy to spoil, but if you've been on the fence about reading this series, I highly recommend that you give yourself a few days off to just sit and read these (or listen to them). They're that good and addicting. Even though I'm giving myself breaks in between each book, I am always thinking about them!

Seriously can't wait to get my hands on the next one!

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209. The Ferryman by Justin Cronin--⭐️⭐️⭐️

It has been a LONG time since I've read anything by Justin Cronin. I remember that summer, years ago, when I fell into THE PASSAGE--the bible-thin pages taunting me--and completely falling in love. I didn't know what to expect from THE FERRYMAN, but the concept seemed interesting and I wanted to read something new from Cronin that didn't have to do with his spooky tome of a series.

Long story short, I thought THE FERRYMAN was...okay?

I THINK I understand what Cronin was trying to do with this one. I even see this as a bittersweet love letter to grief. Grief over a future lost; grief over what could have been and is actually a completely different existence. The whole experience was like a manic dream highlighted by the grief that the characters carry in their hearts. This aspect was powerful and honestly so heartbreaking.

One of the things that I recalled from THE PASSAGE were the parental undertones when one of the children lacked a parent to help guide them in their scary new world. This is another part of THE FERRYMAN that I think Cronin did well.

What I think was a flaw in THE FERRYMAN was the structure of the story and the at-times wordiness of the story, even though this book was much shorter than THE PASSAGE. We kept jumping from one storyline to another, and another, and another. Just when I thought I was getting a grip of where the story had jumped to, we were thrust into another new reality. The structure was akin to an onion full of layers--metaphorical layers that made me cry with frustration because understanding was such a slippery concept. Thankfully, the ending really and truly helped me understand what the hell was going on, but the journey was admittedly exhausting.

I'm happy I read this because it was different and challenged me, but the exhausting nature of it also makes me happy I made it to the end. (I don't foresee a re-read in my future.) Overall, I enjoyed the messages in this, but the execution could have been done better (unless disorienting the reader was the goal, then bravo!)

___

210. Time to Shine by Rachel Reid--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I received a copy from the publisher. This did not affect my rating in any way!

I LOVED THIS BOOK.

Listen, I haven't stayed up until 5:30AM listening to a book in FOREVER. Rachel Reid hits us again with another incredible M/M hockey romance! I simply adored this--in the "kicking my feet with joy" way.

The himb0 MC is the cutest person I have read in a book in a long time. One of my favourite lines he says is "Sometimes he had thought ideas were great and they turned out to be terrible, like the time he stirred peanut butter into his coffee." (Quote is from the ARC.) My sweet summer child. This quote pretty much paints a perfect idea of how he his. He's the sweetest and most...sexual guy ever and I fell immediately in love.

The second and quieter MC is this tall and shy badass goalie who is the biggest cinnamon roll. I wanted to hug him (after asking first) and take on some of the grief and guilt he carries with him for a good chunk of the book. His anxiety and adverseness to his talkative counterpart was hilarious and watching him slowly open up was the absolute best.

One of the best things about this book, which I have already told a couple of people, is the communication between the two characters. Consent is always important and it is definitely highlighted in this book.

TIME TO SHINE is an apt title, not just because we see these characters grow to be the brightest people they can be (in their worlds), but because this book is a like a ray of sunshine full of important topics, but most importantly, such a pure and sweet love.

I giggled, fell in love, and sweated my way through the smut.

I'm in love and I hope there's more coming in this world (or at least from Reid!)

___

211. The Wild Robot by Peter Brown--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I listened to the audiobook and this was an incredibly great choice. The production level was incredible and I can see younger readers falling in love immediately. I almost wish the sound effects had played throughout the whole book.

The mini storylines of how Roz the robot made friends and survived on the island were so sweet that I couldn't help but smile throughout the whole book. I especially loved the storyline where she was the mom to an orphaned little goose. It made my heart feel so warm and fuzzy--it was just so, so cute.

Now I understand why so many little ones come into the bookstore looking for this series! It has a lot of great messages of forgiveness and the complexities of the topic, friendships, different kinds of parents, never judging someone before getting to know them, and how family isn't always blood-related but can be made up of those around us who love us. It's an incredible wholesome book.

I think this would be a great book for an even younger demographic than 9-12. I think I'd recommend this for as young as eight or nine--especially when one considers what some kids are reading now. This is a wholesome read with very, very minimal violence and a whole lot of love.

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Have you read any of these books? Let me know your thoughts!

___

Happy reading!

#Review #Reviews #book reviews #my writing #my opinion #long text post #Features #book blog #book blogger #bookworm #books #booklr #bookish #bookaholic #books and reading #book lover #book list #book recs #reading #read #reader #readers of tumblr #readers community #readers life #reading community #book review

[neathbound-fiends]

Don't wanna actually try and write and also don't wanna like spam Discord servers w this anymore since I haven't actually written much of it but like. Horticultural Show + the blorbos (sticking under cut bc this is gonna be a long post and also spoilers)

Elliott is AT the show. He spends the whole day happily gardening and swapping tips with people and sharing gardening implements and generally just having an absolutely grand time of it. He has never been more excited about any festival before, and then it just gets DESTROYED. His daughter is there. He knows that they won't escape the glasshouse. The only thing he can do is grab her in his arms and try to shield her from it and shout not to be afraid, to hope that if this all comes down, it will actually make a difference for her. It misses them, mostly, and though he is injured, he ignores it for the time being. There's more important things to be focused on than cracked ribs or likely head trauma--as long as he's upright, he intends to pitch in. He ends up helping with the relief efforts, doing whatever he can to make things work, running triage, helping search parties, directing people--whatever Jenny has for work, he's doing it, because they need all the help they can get. He can't just do nothing, not when the City is falling apart and no one in power is doing anything to stop it. The ship ends up doing what it did during the GCO, serving as a shelter and meeting ground and field hospital for anyone that wanders on board. He's among the exhausted zailors that are clearly out of their depth but are among the numbers that have agreed to give it their all for however long it takes. When it eventually becomes clear that this isn't working, when they finally change the playing field to the air, he is coaxed into helping there, too, even though he is terrified of the dirigibles. He is going to give his life if they ask him to, because the City is worth more than him. If it secures everyone's safety, it's more than worth it. The airship doesn't make it, but they manage to land it safely (more or less) without suffering any casualties (only injuries). He is watching the roof and knows that people he loves are still up there. He doesn't know how this is going to end

Warren is at the show, too, when the stalactite comes down. She knows that something horrible is going on, and she doesn't know what it is, but all she knows is she's petrified and can't run away and her father is grabbing her and shouting in terror not to be scared, and that scares her even more. Whatever it is, he is afraid for his life, and hers too. The stalactite misses her, she's scared but mostly unharmed, and everyone is rushed outside as quickly as possible to get them away from whatever is happening, and the sounds of it are seared into her mind. She is dragged into Parabola briefly, but she won't stay there. Not when everyone she cares about is out there. She does what she can to help, but mostly she huddles with other survivors to keep out of the way. Arthur wishes her a happy birthday, and so does everyone in the room with them when they overhear it. She doesn't feel like it's really much to celebrate, huddled in this building with a bunch of strangers. It isn't exceptionally festive in any case. Someone scrounges together a couple sweets as a gift, an apology that THIS is her party. Elliott wishes a happy birthday to her, too, when she sees him, and seems surprised that it's already Friday. The time is slipping away from him. She doesn't see him much, though. He's constantly busy with work right now, sleeping on the ship during the brief moments he does, and then going right back to work. She feels terribly alone during this except for Arthur, and she would never slight him by implying that he isn't enough, but she is reminded very poignantly of being on the streets with no one but eachother to rely on, and wants some reassurance this won't be the case again. And then everyone is going up, up where she can't go, where she won't go because it's a place for grownups, because she's afraid, because there is the very real chance she won't come back if she does. The missed birthday doesn't feel very important right now, but she is reassured before everyone leaves that they will return for a makeup party. She wants to believe it's true

Arthur hears the sound of the stalactite from home. He doesn't know, but he knows that that's where his kid is. He's running the rooftops in the opposite direction of the urchins fleeing the destruction, and there is the wreckage of the glasshouse. His kid is in there. The pair of them stumble out of the wreckage, and he scrambles up onto her shoulders to purr as hard as he can and reassure her. He's getting them out of here, NOW. There's no time to wait for Elliott--he'll find them, the first priority is getting the kid into Parabola, getting her into his territory where she'll be safe. She won't stay here, and he knows it, but he can keep her here as long as he can. He can prolong the safety as far as he can stretch it before they're back out in the thick of it. He picks through wreckage, bringing back supplies to barter and food to eat, whatever he can get to try and keep them both taken care of. Despite his dislike of him, he's regretful to see Elliott go. He's even more regretful to hear word that the ship's are being destroyed, that only a slim percentage are landing with crew intact enough to revive. He's frightened by the prospect of them having to forge a new family. He's worried about his kid pulling through this

Florence isn't near the glasshouse when it starts, she didn't care about the show at all, but she knows when things start going south. She can hear the destruction and the screaming, and word reaches her quickly of exactly what is happening over there. There are a couple people she checks on, but she's not about to risk her own neck needlessly. She hits the Flit and is up as high as she can get, away from everything that's going on in the streets. And it takes some time, but eventually Jenny gets things moving in the right direction, and they need extra hands, and she considers Jenny her rival, but this is a little more important than her grudge. And then she's running the search parties, and then she's lying when they ask about her qualifications, and then she's captaining an airship she has absolutely no business being behind the wheel of to take surveys. And it's fun! It's exciting! It feels good to be doing something that might actually help, and, she must admit, it's thrilling to be piloting a dirigible at inadvisable speeds and hurtling between stalactites and dodging obstacles (geographic and organic alike). And then she hears the plan. She receives her orders and they say "you're going to push ahead and take it on directly" and suddenly this is very very real. Suddenly these people's lives are in her hands while she's playing pretend, and she can't back out now, but what is she supposed to do? So she goes. They rise with the others, and she pushes through, and as soon as she sees the oculus, everything is brought into sharp focus. This is more real than she was prepared for. That shaft of light falls, and it's the first time she's ever seen the Sun. It is unimaginably bright, searing her eyes and forcing her to flinch and put a hand up to shield herself from it. That is going to kill everyone. The cannons keep glancing off of it, and everyone around them is going down. THEY'RE going down. So she looks at the handful of people in the ship with her and all she can say is "I'm sorry" before pointing the wreckage straight at the certain doom ahead of them. The woman that wouldn't risk her neck for anyone is aiming straight for certain death in the hopes that it will mean something. That it will save the City she hadn't thought worth saving just a couple weeks ago. And when the Boat Man confirms it did something--that plan WORKED--she is beside herself. She is screaming in absolute, overwhelming joy, shaking the Starved Lithologer by the shoulders and reaching to do the same to the Boat Man. She hasn't been an urchin or a zailor's wife for a long time, but that doesn't mean she doesn't remember the shanties and stupid songs they riffed off of Mahogany Hall classics, and her celebration doesn't end when she's back in London proper

The Surgeon is busy when the festivities roll around, and all the better for it. Sitting in a building full of strangers and spore fever isn't exactly his idea of a good time. But there is no denying the sounds that erupt from the site are the kind of utter destruction. The sounds like a fraction of the next City is dropping. He's disgusted to hear it's Starved, their amber tainted presence a blight upon the City. Truthfully, he doesn't care to lend a hand, but he knows Shale does, and anything they want of him is theirs. So he opens the doors of his clinic as another spot to bring the wounded for treatment, distinctly aware of the scars that arc across his chest reacting to the presence of the amber and its bearers. The body never forgets. He doesn't do anything with the airships--that isn't his skill set, and he doesn't intend to risk his own safety or anyone else's by going up there and deciding to try and figure it out on the fly. There is enough work on the ground to keep him busy while other people decide to be heroes

Bolormaa didn't even intend to still be in London, but he's at the Docks when the stalactite falls. They can see it from there, see it plummeting towards the glasshouse and the people within it, and instantly the whole ship is disembarking and sprinting towards it, with him leading the pack. He's dragging people out of the rubble and away from danger, and hoping the entire time that none of these people who are beyond salvaging are ones that he cares about. He is among the first to enlist with the Admiralty to serve as their gunners, using his expertise with a cannon to the great advantage of everyone who doesn't want to see London torn to pieces as much in its defense as in its attack. He is unsure of how long he's at his post, training new people on the fly and keeping at it himself, but he is occasionally dragged away from his station to snatch a little bit of rest before he's right back to it. He doesn't have much sway back at home, he isn't an important political figure, but he sends a letter in Hudum nonetheless imploring them to send support. He doesn't love London. He isn't even sure he likes it. But that doesn't mean that everyone in it deserves to have their homes destroyed and their lives lost. When they ask for help on the airships, he's again one of the first enlisting. They need all the help they can get if they're trying to take the oculus out, missed shots don't count. When the airship starts going down, he fires off one last shot that pings off of it but doesn't do any damage. He knows the only choice is to try and land and hope that whoever is up there can come up with a better plan

Rhoda is in the Shuttered Palace when everything happens--she is in the middle of the horribly dull hobnobbing expected of her at these awful salons, when suddenly the world outside seems to be crashing down upon them. The doors lock so suddenly she doesn't even have time to register what it means, instead pressed to the windows like the other guests, trying to catch a glimpse of what it is. Nobody gets in, and nobody gets out. People who come to the Palace to beg for help are turned away without an audience, without even a shred of hope, and she's so filled with rage and disgust at the lack of any care from inside, that she shatters a window to the outside. She watches in horror at everything happening out there. There are innocent people out there. Her brother is out there. She bides her time in a frenzy of sketches of new ideas for arrangements, fungal and elegant, and then into the grotesque forms of the creatures mutilating the City. The Palace may be well stocked, but it can only hold out for so long. The first time a supply run is made, she's ready. She bolts, taking the cart with her and getting it to Jenny's headquarters where it will be defended by people who deserve to use it. She doesn't know a d___ed thing about flying, she doesn't attempt to join the airships, but that doesn't mean that she isn't busy. There is work to be done until the last plank is put up, the last injury healed, the last ship landed. This isn't her City, she doesn't love London, but she does love the people within it. It's up to its citizens to defend it themselves, and she watches with anxiety to see what happens next

#horticulture hell #fallen london #fallen london spoilers #Horticultural Show spoilers #Florence is really out here experiencing unexpected character growth from this event #anyway everyone is absolutely suffering regardless of their status in the City or their loyalties or lack thereof to it lol! teehee! #it works out but BOY does it hurt before then and take its sweet time getting there and even then it's still difficult work #this event was SO much. I write really slowly but I really wanted to at least get my thoughts out if nothing else before the hype moves on #and no one really cares about it anymore lmao

[sequesteredschizo]

cw // suicidal ideation & self harm 

thought too much about where I should post these words @ and where to do it if I did

Decided on here, both to challenge myself to be honest about how I'm doing and as a small private testament to myself, esp considering I can't guarantee I'll remember any of this later if I don't 

A few months ago I decided I was supposed to kill myself on April 26th 2024. I think something about doing that nullified certain anxieties of mine at times, for better and for worse. I thought the worst thing I could do that would ruin everyone I cared about was already going to happen, so I was able to loosen my grip somewhat on the people-pleasing and the social anxiety and the agoraphobia- maybe a sort of subconscious 'if something doesn't change, i will be dying. So I might as well try while I'm still around.' I've been callous and I've been unstable, but I also took risks (or, actions I that felt like risks to me) that landed me with more life-affirming results than I could have ever anticipated.

I sent texts I thought were annoying and stupid to people I wished I talked to more, I tried to eat like a well-adjusted adult person, I was honest with my dad about how hellish my disability was making my life for the first time. Etc etc. Anything to connect, anything to survive. I didn't care anymore. it felt like the end of the world. To everyone else it probably seemed like I was finally re-entering society, if anyone thought much of it at all (unlikely, imo.) At one point, I hurt myself worse than I ever had before, and without really meaning to, haven't done it since. It feels now like a microcosm of the bigger picture, just by coincidence. Doing better wasn't necessarily my intention, but it was a consequence of thinking I was fucking it all up one last time. Might as well throw all the chips in.

Last weekend I attended a wedding out-of-state for a relative I hadn't seen in years knowing id meet countless new faces and I didn't even freak out. And I was terrified, and I didn't want to go there and I didn't want to stay here but I did it anyways. Turns out I don't think I've ever felt so loved and welcomed and appreciated in my life. The people I reached out to on a whim, because what was the worst that could happen? Some of them actually respond back, fucking shocker. My dad is trying to stop pretending I don't exist. I'm a little less malnourished. So those are all good developments.

I feel like I reached up into an empty sky with the very last dregs of energy I had and by some miracle, just enough of the universe reached back. I don't and didnt want to scar and endanger my struggling loved ones because I couldn't be strong enough to deal with myself. It had to be my last option, after truly trying everything I could. I didn't even do much, and I didn't expect it to work. I didn't expect my favorite band to be dropping new shit on my due date. I didn't know that I would really honestly from the bottom of my heart not want to leave this fucked up horrible beautiful tragic world behind. 

I know there's always going to be a part of me that expects me to commit. it's always been easier for me to hurt myself than help myself. I've written a lot of suicide notes throughout my life. This is the first time I've ever done the opposite, I guess? This is supposed to be my promise to me that I want to live. I need to. Its really hard to admit that to myself. I'm pretty sure I can do it tho.

I think (and almost hope) that the handful of you who follow this stupid little blog wont read this, but I posted it here because theres too many people everywhere else. It's directed at myself anyway.

a distant yell into a cacophonous void, in hopes that typing it will act as a metaphysical vehicle for manifesting it in the collective subconscious:

TRANS PEOPLE DONT KILL YOURSELF!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[zalrb]

the summer i turned pretty 2x05 review - this should be WAY messier than it is

I was talking to @jewels20 about this horrible show and we were laughing because I was like, idk everyone is insufferable except Conrad who doesn't have enough of a personality to be insufferable, he's just around being sad and everyone hates him for it. Like, he's just THERE trying to deal with his mother's death, guys. He hasn't actually DONE anything. He's just a guy. Who's sad. And I just find it really funny because they frame as like this enigma or this asshole and I'm just like idk, he just seems sad.

No more recaps, I'm a professional.

I was like what does the opening tune of the show remind me of because I swear I've heard something like it and I realized it reminds me of season 1 YOU.

It's even in the little things, if Jere is supposed to be frenzied running up the stairs, then RUN up the stairs, this is a light jog, sir, you might as well just walk.

I don't know what he's looking for. If everything is gone downstairs, it seems only natural that things would be gone upstairs too.

"Everything's gone" I mean ... LOOK AROUND?

This is the most emotion Conrad has shown and it's not even mediocre, it just SEEMS decent in the context of how flat everyone -- including him -- usually is.

Again this whole fight should be a FIGHT, talk over one another, if you're trying to stop Conrad from railing up on Skye, Conrad actually has to come in with that energy, wrench away, everything is SO careful, too careful for this to have the energy needed to match Jeremiah's monotonous voiceover about everything be fucked.

Why is this dude -- the festival worker dude -- STILL here? How does this have anything to do with you?

Jere: I DON'T LOOK UP TO MY BIG BROTHER ANYMORE AFTER THIS YEAR. I CAN TAKE CHARGE also Jere: KEEPS tapping a key card as if it'll suddenly unlock the door after it's been rejected like ten times.

"My mom works the randomnest hours so that alone should..." then why didn't you say this after the, like, sixth time Jeremiah tried to use his clearly deficient key card?

I need Belly's brother to shut up.

"Are you OK?" *Conrad proceeds to explain how he's feeling* have the writers ever written before? I...

"That invisible force between the two of them" WHERE? WHERE?

W H E RE?

"And it's tearing her up that you haven't responded to her texts since last summer" that is not what I saw. I saw her make a frowny face.

"Like it hurts, my chest physically hurts to not be able to tell her that I'm in love with her" then I need MORE than what I am SEEING. If you're going to have this kind of dialogue have the energy to match it.

"And my genius plan to stay pissed at her and keep her at arm's length is a failure" Yeah we saw that already, why are we rehashing in a voiceover? Also why was it a failure though because she didn't really do anything to make you crumble? Like ... none of these dynamics are believable or earned. They're all so hollow.

"You do have a flair for the epic." It's a screening room.

Yeah, they are marginally less terrible than her and Conrad. I kind of almost believe this

more than the beach anyway. And when they stop and do the stare I believe that more than when she and Conrad stop and do the stare.

How on the nose, The Apartment on the projector when Belly is beginning the process of switching brothers. Again. (It's a "don't slut shame" message for the viewer).

"She'd go all out. She'd pick a theme and pick three movies in a row" unless it's watching the director's cut of LOTR back-to-back-to-back that is not boast worthy. That's just a classic binge and I don't even really consider that a binge. A fourth movie would be a binge.

You can put The Apartment up on the projector all you want, Belly is messy for this. So is Jere.

Oh this Taylor/Steven scene looks long, I am skipping it.

"I know she missed having you as a friend" oh honey, she's switched over now.

"I wanted to call you" "I wish you would've. I would've answered. I would've come' right but you said nothing to him during holiday dinner? LOL OK BELLY.

Guys, she's horrible. I'm sorry, but she really is.

Honestly, if you write out the plot, this show should be WILD, like Belly likes Conrad and kisses his younger brother Jeremiah because of reasons then Conrad is like hey I like you so she kisses Conrad like, what, a day later, two days later, the same day? Then she tells Jere hey I actually want to be with your brother then gets with said brother, sleeps with said brother, breaks up with said brother because he was sad at prom, tells said brother to go to hell and that she hates him at his mother's wake, then proceeds to start crushing on Jeremiah again? THIS SHOULD BE A ROLLERCOASTER.

lol Conrad does nooooooot care that Jere's pissed.

The minute I saw the golf cart I was like, oh good, another DC reference.

"I think I loved Conrard longer and true than anyone in my whole life" I mean you're like 5 minutes old, Belly, who could you have possibly loved longer?

And dialogue like this would be fine if I thought the show tapped into what it feels like to be a teenager in love, like Dawson's Creek really tapped into how you feel at 15/16, how heightened everything can be, all the hyper-dramatic emotions so that when Dawson and Joey are like YOU ARE MY SOULMATE and Pacey and Joey are like YOU HAVE MY FUTURE, YOU HAVE MY HEART and Pacey and Andie are like YOU ARE MY HERO I'm like yes, that makes sense.

Even Allison and Scott, like yeah, that's a first love

and Crystal sells it with HOW she speaks about him

"Cause I don't know if I can survive that" AGAIN where is the DRAMA? WHERE was this love she could never recover from? I SHOULD BE GETTING THIS ENERGY

oh this show pisses me off.

Skye and Cam Cameron have the most solid dynamic and they're barely side characters.

"I'll text her right now" you shouldn't text your teacher/authority figure at night, Belly. But why am I surprised when she doesn't have any boundaries.

Skye: "We worked so hard on this" they have the most conviction out of everyone there.

"It's pretty clear to me now that I never actually did" Why? Because he gave her a noogie.

This show is so unserious.

And the coach should not be replying at night either.

she cannot be serious.

I don't think she's supposed to be as insufferable as she is.

The house is sold.

#review

[meowmeowuchiha]

Ranting about the new Borderlands movie under the cut

Okay I'm just gonna say it

The Borderlands movie trailer? Doesn't look AS BAD as I thought it would, but still awful.

Most of the characters are extremely miscast

But honestly? I don't think Kevin Hart is that terrible of a miscast.

If it was Borderlands 2 and pre sequel Roland then yeah he'd be awful and I feel like that's what most people are thinking of.

But if you're going based off of first game Roland? He's not that bad. Just listen to the voice lines from Roland from the first game. Can find it on YouTube easy enough.

On to everyone else!!

Ariana Greenblatt as Tiny Tina: Honestly, I'm gonna just say that it's both miscast and miswritten, but I acknowledge that it's probably gonna be pretty damn hard to find someone who could pass as a younger teenager (since Tina in the 2nd game is 13) who could also feasibly act as Tina. She's a very very unique character and I feel like acting as her, even if she WAS written properly, would be incredibly difficult. Getting that combination of batshit insane, childish naivety, and actually knowing what she's doing would be TOUGH. Ariana Greenblatt, from what I've seen, does well enough as bratty snarky teens. Tina was written as that for some god forsaken reason.

JLC as Tannis (aside from the fact that JLC is a fucking zionist. I'm only critiquing casting based on how they are as actors, not whether or not they're decent people.) isn't...terrible? It's odd, and I can't give a definitive opinion on it because hardly anything is heard from her in the trailer.

Jack Black as Claptrap: Honestly, personality wise, not a bad fit for Claptrap. However, voice wise, absolutely a terrible fit. Claptrap's voice I'd supposed to be shrill, nasally, and just overall ear grating. That's part of his CHARM. The rest of the fault in how awful they did with Claptrap lies in the writing. I will admit, I'm not certain who I would've cast as Claptrap instead, but I at the very least would have tried to see if Jack Black could try and at least imitate Claptrap's voice??? Or just...like I said, found someone better.

Cate Blanchett as Lilith: Yeeeaaaah, very miscast. I'm not even all that upset by the age thing. That's like....a tiny tiny gripe that tbh I think people are focusing way too much on. When the real problem is the fact that Lilith was HORRIBLY written for the movie. Lilith, in the games, is this hotheaded, snarky, cocky woman. She's the woman who's told "hey, for strategy reasons, we need you to stay behind for this fight" and responds with "no I'm going >:(" and shows up anyways. She's the one who goes "I...liquefied a guy. It was AWESOME!! This eridium stuff is the TITS!!!". She is not the stone cold badass bitch that she seems to be in the movie. I will admit, I haven't seen anywhere NEAR Cate Blanchett's full filmography. I've only seen a tiny handful of movies. But from the ones I've seen, she doesn't tend to play characters like Lilith. Her characters tend to be more serious. Less snarky and sarcastic. She just....doesn't seem to fit in the Borderlands universe at all really to me??? She'd be miscast in pretty much any role. The only one I could MAYBE see her managing would be like....Athena. Again, not her fault, just...the vibes. Lilith was terribly written for the movie, and was also terribly miscast.

I can't really say anything regarding anyone else, as I didn't really see enough of them to form even the barest hint of an opinion. Either way, the movie is going to be awful, even if it might not be as terrible as I'd thought it would be before the trailer.

If you're gonna watch it, pirate it if you care about Palestine. The director and at least a couple of the actors (JLC, Edgar Ramirez) are zionists, and yet more of them (Jack Black, Gina Gershon) are of the mind that it's a two sided conflict and they want both sides to make peace and their hearts go out to both sides.

#Borderlands #Borderlands movie #Ranting #Lmao I highly doubt any of my followers will give a shit about this but I felt like saying it anyways #Also gonna say that if I'm being honest Borderlands was never meant to be made into a movie it just doesn't work #They should just stop making video game movies in general ngl

[floating-in-the-blue]

💻👀🌈🌾😊 (yes i'm being annoying by asking so many)

Annoying ... by asking me many questions about my writing ... pfff, sure 🤣 (thank youuu!)

💻 The first fanfiction you posted?

Oh God, you made me rummage around in my old fanfiktion.de account, how dare you!! Uhm ... so apparently the first fanfic I posted there was a one shot for "Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog" ... I had absolutely no memory of that!

👀 What’s an idea you had for a fic that you never did anything with?

The Regency AU idea probably counts because I think I only wrote down like three lines if at all. It would have included too much research, tbh, so I don't expect it to ever take off.

It was my attempt to imagine an enemy to lovers Willex scenario that came out only one sided enemies to lovers. Basically, Willie drives reckless chariot races and nearly drives over Luke and Reggie (which is the only way Alex's spite could overcome his gayness) and then Willie tries to win Alex over who is desperately trying to stay mad at him. There might have been an evil Caleb side plot.

🌈 Your favorite tropes to write about?

Hm ... I generally write aus more than canon fic. I love soulmate aus (because the concept is actually fucked up) but for some reason, I still haven't written a willex soulmate au even though they're so soulmatey!

Idk, I don't usually approach my writing with specific tropes in mind, like "I want to write a XY fic". I'm still kind of surprised the Star Trek AU became my first (and so far only) "there's only one bed" fic.

🌾 A fic you really want to write but you haven’t (yet)?

I mean, there's several because I write at the pace of a snail pushing a rock uphill (most of the time) but since it's you, I'm going with this one idea @innytoes and I brainstormed for a different version of your biker au where Alex's car breaks down on his way to a family event, which he planned to attend with Willie as a fake boyfriend only Willie let him down at the last minute (Alex made the mistake of confessing his feelings and spooked Willie).

He meets biker Caleb, Caleb agrees to do the fake boyfriend, becomes his real boyfriend and then they discover Caleb used to date Willie. It all ends in OT3 :D

😊 The fic that you’re the most proud of?

The dumb answer to that is: All of them!! I am proud of all of them, flaws and all.

But ...you are going to make me choose so ...today I'm going with my most recent one: The Birthday Gift because I wrote that in three days and it's porn and my POV character is tied up so can't do all that much and I think it came out pretty good actually and I also got to start a new relationship tag on AO3 with Caleb/Alex/Willie (and I am shocked there's not more ... which I might change if I write the biker AU AU mentioned in the previous answer)

Ask Me Things

#yeo writes

[seeingteacupsindragons]

Making a list of the things I've written since the beginning of 2016 to remind myself of stuff I've got done since my mental health collapsed and I had to rebuild it

New draft of Ambrose's book for an R&R (2016-2017, even though the original book was pre-2016)

About 60k words of a bloated, awful book that was abandoned and is unsalvageable, honestly

A monstrous 150k first draft, a second draft that cut it down to about 90k, poked at a third draft, before also abandoning it

About 55k of a NaNo project that was abandoned before actually being finished, because it sucked. But I did win NaNo that year

Two drafts of Tiadane's book (about 2/3 done of draft three)

About 25k words of Avel's book; on hold due to not having time to properly untangle the narrative while revisions are in-progress; not abandoned.

5 CHKDSK short stories, approximating like 23-24k? Each are between 3-5k

That short story I posted on Tumblr like a month ago (roughly 3k)

Various flash fic pieces and unfinished projects (no real clear number, just lots of noodling around with generally less than 2k each, if even that

Anyway, it feels like I haven't accomplished a lot in those last seven years because so many of the things I tried were just awful and needed to be abandoned before completion, which I hadn't done since early college, so it felt weird at the time.

But it's also kind of reassuring to see that I was trying so many different things. I never gave up looking, even when nothing was working out.

Anyway, burnout sucks, trying to write with deeply untreated mental illness is hard, and frankly, on top of being some of the most difficult writing years of my life, everything sucked.

I think I've come out of this period a better writer, but jeez, there's honestly some writing trauma I had to work through because of how badly it was going for a while there and how all my writing went completely to shit from a skill perspective.

And not even in a levelling up way. The books I wrote in 2015 are better than the ones I wrote in 2018, even though they're worse than the ones I write in 2023. They were just very bad.

Just looking at three solidly attempted novels that were given up is something kind of tragic and horrifying. Feels like something slaughtered that I had to struggle past after watching it die horribly.

Especially knowing how hard it was to even get anything written of those projects. I fought so hard for what feels like nothing.

Trauma.

I think thinking about it that way, and recognizing that I had to rebuild my entire writing process that I'd had for nearly two decades as it fell down around me, helps me think about why recovering has taken so long and been so tentative and slow.

#writing

[rhysmademedoit]

So...

I recently rewatched the 1997 movie Batman and Robin, which was a mistake, but probably not in the way you'd expect. I have a lot of opinions about this movie now. In fact, I have so many opinions that I need to make a tumblr post breaking them down before I go crazy.

Let me say that I went into this movie with an open mind. It's a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad, movie, but I do genuinely think it has some interesting points. I'll start with the casting.

George Clooney is legitimately the worst Batman ever put to the silver screen. He's just playing George Clooney. I've seen him do a good job in other movies so I have to assume he read the script and decided to just phone it in.

Chris O'Donnell actually does a much better job as Robin in this movie than he did in Batman Forever. He and Batman feel like an actual team this time, even if Clooney could be carrying his weight more. The actual character O'Donnell plays in this movie is fairly over the top, but I think he does a good job grounding him in the reality of this movie.

Arnold Schwarzenegger actually really fits Mr. Freeze in a weird way. His cold, mechanical delivery evokes the Terminator, proving he still has what it takes to play a villain. The problem is that Mr. Freeze himself is TERRIBLY written. EVERY LINE HE SAYS IS AN ICE PUN!!! He's probably the single worst part of this movie, but I don't blame Arnold for that, he did a good job with what he had.

Uma Thurman is another actor I've seen do a great performance in other movies. For some reason, she decided to play Poison Ivy like she's Rita Repulsa. That might work for Power Rangers, but it feels really out of place here. It's a shame since I think Poison Ivy in this movie had a lot of untapped potential.

Alicia Silverstone is an actress I haven't seen in anything else, so I don't want to judge her too harshly. She's just... not very good in this. Not bad necessarily. I don't know if she wasn't given enough direction or didn't understand her character or what. Batgirl is actually a kind of interesting character who, like most things in this movie, doesn't get fleshed out enough. She does have some sweet moments though. Most of them are helped by the real star of the show...

Michael Gough delivers what has to be the greatest Alfred performance of all time, and definitely HIS greatest Alfred performance. And why shouldn't he? By far, he has the best scenes and the best lines in the entire movie, elevating the entire thing from a cheesy kids film to something that actually has a little maturity. Singlehandedly he becomes the sole reason to rewatch this movie. The "soul" of the movie, if you will.

I guess now it's time to talk about the plot of this movie. I'll be covering it in very broad strokes so I don't end up writing this forever.

From the get-go, two things are VERY apparent: (1.) This movie's visuals, lighting, and set design are awe-inspiring and (2.) A lot of the dialogue is absolutely HORRIBLE. It feels unfinished. Mr. Freeze looks jaw-droppingly epic in his suit with pitch black eyes and a glowing blue mouth, but it's all downplayed by the fact that he never has anything even remotely interesting to say. When Batman is saying lines like "Hey Freeze, I'm Batman" I just picture a little annotation next to it in the script saying *write a cool opening line here.

After an admittedly good fight scene with Mr. Freeze, we're introduced to one of the main conflicts of the movie: Batman doesn't trust Robin. I actually really like that premise. It feels true to the characters while also making for some interesting drama. Hopefully we see that same concept taken on by a better movie one day.

Next up, we're introduced to Pamela Isley, who gets turned into Poison Ivy... somehow. The movie really doesn't make it clear. I think they wanted to do a similar thing to Catwoman with Dr. Woodrew being her Max Shreck, but they plow through it before you even have time to think. Oh, and Bane is here too. I didn't mention him because he's just a strong henchman for Batman and Robin to fight, and honestly might as well just be a giant plant monster. In fact, he kind of is a giant plant monster, since Venom in this movie comes from Poison Ivy's plants. Whatever, on to the next scene.

At stately Wayne Manor, the movie does a really good job setting up that Alfred is getting older. He's a lot slower to respond, gets tired faster, and all around just looks much older here. We're also introduced to Barbara... Wilson?? I actually think making her Alfred's niece instead of Commissioner Gordon's daughter makes a ton of sense for this movie. After all, what better way to flesh out Alfred as a character than showing him interact with family? And as I said before, these moments are genuinely very touching! I love this stuff!

Gotham Observatory, another gorgeous set with a giant statue holding the observatory in the air. Pamela says some really interesting things to Bruce here, and in many ways she's right, the elite should be focused on saving the planet rather than exploring the stars. I think she could've used her hypnotism on this entire room and gotten what she wants immediately, but then the next scene wouldn't happen. Also Bruce Wayne randomly has a girlfriend now? She's only in two more scenes and is really forgettable. I don't see what the point of her is.

This is probably the scene most people think of when they think of this movie. I don't actually have anything to say about it that hasn't already been said, but there were some lines I do genuinely find funny, like when Batman says "You don't have the money," and Robin replies "I'll borrow it from you!" Batman having a credit card is dumb but in a fun way that I can appreciate.

Mr. Freeze shows up in his tank and steals the diamond, and a car chase ensues. The scene of Batman actually capturing Mr. Freeze is actually pretty funny, but more importantly, that point of conflict between Batman and Robin is brought up again. It's actually a really interesting moment because although Batman was genuinely saving his partner, the entire reason Robin wanted to risk his life was to prove himself, an attitude which came about because of Batman's overprotectiveness. It's pretty complex stuff considering the movie it's in.

I like this scene in Arkham because it shows how the patients detained here are treated inhumanely, but the movie doesn't do anything with that which is another huge missed opportunity. At least we get a nice little nod to the last movie's villains.

Plot twist! Barbara isn't actually the sweet uni student you thought she was, she's actually a street racing punk who wears leather and despises authority! The visuals of the street race are stunning as always, but the part that sticks out to me the most is how she completely slams Bruce and Richard for their treatment of Alfred. They've always thought of him as family, but in reality he's just their servant, and now we have his actual family member coming in to challenge them. It would be super compelling stuff if they actually focused on it for more than two seconds.

I can't find a good picture, but something about the set design of Mr. Freeze's lab feels really cheap. The set itself is cool but the lighting design feels oddly bright, almost washed out. It gives off a kids TV show vibe, not helped by their encounter with Bane and Poison Ivy which is really cheesy. There's a good moment of banter between Batman and Robin to let us know they've reconciled, and Arnie does a good job showing the stress Mr. Freeze is under, but that's about it. If you saw this scene on TV with no context, you'd think it was a made for TV movie.

This next part is really silly. Why would Poison Ivy want Mr. Freeze to freeze all of Gotham? Wouldn't that kill all of her plants? The part where she seduces Commissioner Gordon is probably my favorite scene of Gordon in this entire quadrilogy, he really does a good job playing up the goofiness. The biggest problem is that the plant-infested GCPD headquarters looks really cheap. It's like the opposite of Mr. Freeze's Lab: the lighting is beautiful but the actual set looks so fake. Speaking of things that look cheap, what's with that Batgirl costume? It doesn't even look like a bat! This is probably one of the dumbest scenes in the entire movie, but it's still kind of sweet that they show Robin still trusting Batman after everything that's come between them.

I've been leaving out a lot, but the fight against Poison Ivy and the fight against Mr. Freeze actually are back to back. The Gotham Observatory is a beautiful set to stage the finale on, even if the actual plan makes no sense. There's also some nice moments of teamwork between the trio where you see how well they work together... or at least they would be nice moments if the three of them had any chemistry together at all. Seriously, this needed another draft. The fight scene isn't anything to write home about, but I do really like Batman's speech to Mr. Freeze at the end. It really shows the evolution of his character. In Batman 89 he was a hard edged antihero and a bit of a psychopath. In Batman Returns he became more bold and confident, but was also willing to open up emotionally. In Batman Forever he gave up his vengeance streak to become a more pacifist hero who only kills in self defense. Now, in Batman and Robin, he's willing to reach out to a man who almost killed the entire city, and to say to him that there's still a good man buried deep inside him somewhere under all the ice. It's too bad George Clooney is still phoning it in or it would have a lot more impact.

I know this movie has a lot of problems. I know I have a lot of problems with this movie. I know that one of my biggest problems with this movie is its cast. And yet somehow, watching the end of this movie, where Alicia Silverstone, Chris O'Donnell, and George Clooney put their hands together and agree to be partners, I couldn't help but feel excited to see them return. I want to see them come back in Batman Unchained. I want to see them fight Coolio's Scarecrow and Joker's daughter Harley Quinn with Batman hallucinating about Jack Nicholson's Joker. Heck, throw Man-Bat in there as well! And Tim Drake as the next Robin! And let's stunt cast everyone because why the heck not.

But that movie's never going to happen now. Even if they made a movie with that exact plot and everyone reprising their roles, it wouldn't be the same. It would just be nostalgia pandering.

There's one scene I left out, but it's arguably the best scene in the entire movie.

Alfred's lying in bed, dying. Bruce says to him "I've spent my entire life trying to beat back death. Everything I've done... Everything I'm capable of doing... but that can't save you." And Alfred responds by saying "There is no defeat in death, Master Bruce. Victory comes in defending what we know is right while we still live." They embrace. Bruce says "I love you, old man." Alfred says "And I love you, too." They smile. It's a beautiful scene on it's own, but it hits even harder because of Barbara's rant to Richard before. When Alfred says "I love you" to Bruce, it resolves his entire character arc in the movie. His search for his family has come to an end. Bruce is his family. Richard is his family. The Wayne's were his family. Batman is his family.

In short, this movie sucks, but I've come to appreciate the little strands of brilliance that live on inside of it. I may even like it a little more than Batman Forever. Just a little though.

Here's to hoping we see the trio of Batman, Robin, and Batgirl return to the big screen in the future. Have an ice day!

#batman #robin #batman and robin #1990s #review #retrospective #batman movie