#implied levi au | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jayteacups · 5 months

Text

It's A Wrap!

Working on Attack on Titan as a makeup artist has irreversibly changed your life. As the end rapidly approaches, you find that letting go is harder than you’d thought. After years of harbouring feelings for Levi that you can’t divulge, his final day on set arrives. You know it’s time to say goodbye to him and part ways—but maybe you don’t have to.

Pairing: Levi Ackerman x GN!Reader

Tags & warnings: Actor!Levi, Makeup artist!Reader, fluff, confessions, friends/idiots to lovers, alcohol consumption, briefly implied sexual content, AOT finale spoilers

Word count: 6.9k words

A/N: I’m back, happy Levi month everyone! I wrote this over the last month to cope with the fact AOT was ending and also life stuff. This is incredibly self indulgent, also I would love to tell more stories and scenarios in this AU, so this probably won’t be the last one-shot I write for actor!Levi and MUA!Reader hehehe. Disclaimer that I don't work in film or TV or makeup, sorry if there are any inaccuracies. Also please forgive me for the uncreative title, lol. Hope you enjoy the fic!

Levi’s last day on set is bittersweet.

For the final time, you lean against the wall and count down the seconds on your watch. The trailer door swings open to reveal the man of the hour. On par for the course, Levi arrives fifteen minutes on the dot before his scheduled arrival time. He’s holding his usual steaming flask of tea in one hand, with a nondescript rucksack (save for a Badtz-Maru keychain gifted to him from the Sanrio collaboration) slung over his shoulder.

“Hey,” you greet him, pushing off from the wall, moving towards him like a moth to flame. He sets down his things in the sitting area and meets you halfway, letting you pull him into your arms. After years of working alongside each other, you’ve both grown accustomed to greeting each other like this in private, especially after the stress the two of you had put yourselves under during the Season 3 shoots.

“How are you feeling? It’s your last day.” You ask him as the two of you part. To your dismay, you’re already missing the warmth of his embrace.

“I’m fine. I’m not going to get all sappy about it.” His face is placid.

“That’s what Hange said when they filmed their death scene, and we saw how that ended,” you say lightheartedly. Hange had sworn to remain jovial and upbeat throughout their last day, but after seeing the several other actors cry at their phenomenal acting, they had promptly broken down. “And I bet you anything that Eren’s going to say that when he and Mikasa do the cabin scene next week, and we all know he’ll be the first to start crying and the last to stop.”

Levi rolls his eyes before he enters the wardrobe area, but you know he’s not serious. “If you think I’m going to break down in tears like Hange and the kids did, you’re dead wrong,” he continues, out of sight.

You smile. “Sure. It’s alright, you know, if you do end up crying. It’s an end of an era, we’re all going to get emotional.”

A few moments later, Levi emerges in costume, sans the bandages. He sits down in front of the mirror at the vanity table. “Yes, but I’m satisfied with what I’ve done here, and I have no regrets,” he muses out loud, continuing on from before. “And it’s not like I’m done with the show. There’s the wrap party, then the press tour and all that. So don’t expect me to get all worked up today. I’m not saying goodbye to Attack on Titan just yet.” His voice softens towards the end.

But it is goodbye for us, you wish to say. And I don’t want it to be. You haven’t been contracted for any of their press events. After you finish with Attack on Titan, you’ll have a handful of weeks before your upcoming contract for a new show begins. It’s a wonderful opportunity; the show is airing on a major streaming service and requires you to push your SFX skills to the limit. Sasha had been cast in one of the main roles and both Onyankopon and Nifa will make appearances too, so you’ll see some familiar faces on this new project. But selfishly, you aren’t ready to let go and move forward. Selfishly, you aren’t ready to part ways with Levi.

Sure, the two of you will make an effort to talk every now and then. You know him far better than to assume he’ll stop talking to you the moment Attack on Titan is finished; despite him being standoffish at first, it’s clear Levi cares deeply about everybody he’s ever worked with, cast or crew alike. But the chances of your demanding schedules ever lining up again are close to zero, and sooner or later, your frequent messages will fizzle out into a conversation lost to the ages. You’ll drift, until the two of you are strangers once more. It’s inevitable; you’ve seen it happen before with your actor friends from old projects. No doubt it’ll happen again.

You consider addressing the elephant in the room, wondering if it lingers on his mind, too. But instead, you hum in agreement and pass him a headband to hold his hair out of the way. He puts it on, clearly content to not bring it up just yet.

Levi chews on the inside of his cheek as you sort out your equipment on the vanity table. Your eyes are immediately drawn to his lips, which are a little more chapped than usual. It’s clear there is something else that’s bothering him, but you decide to let it go for now. Sometimes Levi just needs to sit with his thoughts for a moment. You’ve learned that being pushed just makes him close himself off even more. A life in the limelight can be unforgiving. Kuchel Ackerman had been the brightest star of her generation, but behind the scenes, her personal life was far from glamorous. It doesn’t surprise you that her son keeps his heart and feelings well-guarded.

As he sits and stews, you apply chapstick and some basic ‘barely-there’ makeup on his face, before creating the illusion of a hard-fought battle by adding a light layer of grime to his face. You’ll add more after the scar and bandages. As you work, Levi takes out a folder from his bag, which is embellished with a small cat sticker that Hange had stuck on years ago. From it, he takes his copy of the script, nary a crease in the sheets. Brow furrowed, he reads it over and over, mouthing his lines with the fervour of a prayer.

Now, that is odd.

“There is something on your mind, isn’t there?” You’ve also read the script for today’s scene. The director had decided to save Levi’s most poignant scene—where his character salutes the ghosts of his fallen comrades—for the very end of his shoot. (Levi’s epilogue scene had been shot a week prior.) This would be his most challenging scene yet, for it would be the first time he and his character will ever cry on screen. “You can tell me if you want. Anything you need to help you focus. There’s still time.” You give him a quick squeeze on his shoulder.

Stormy eyes glance up at his reflection, than up at yours. He puts down the script and sighs, voice subdued. “I just want to do the Captain’s ending justice, and I don’t think I can.”

“I think you can,” you murmur. You gesture for him to close his eyes, and pick up your finest brush. Willing your hand and heart into steadiness, you bring the brush up to his forehead, where the largest scar begins. You’ll never get used to how infuriatingly gorgeous he is. “No. I know you can. There is no doubting just how much you care about portraying him correctly.”

He swallows. “Well, I’ve never cried on camera before.” He stops, giving you a moment to work.

With the utmost care, you begin to draw the main line of the largest scar, the one that passes through his eye and lips. As the brush passes over his eyelid, it twitches ever so slightly, his long lashes tickling your hand. Smiling, you brush away a stray lash that had fallen onto his cheek. As you extend the line down his cheek, you try to reassure him. Levi’s usually so steadfast, but it makes sense that something like this would grow heavy on his mind.

“You’ve been practicing it with your coach, though, right? I mean, I’ve had to cover up your swollen eyes a number of times this season.”

“Yeah. Thanks for that, by the way.”

“Don’t mention it.”

The brush reaches his lips. He opens his eyes, looking up at you through lowered lashes. Your heart aflutter, you staunchly ignore any and all thoughts of kissing him. Doing so has become more and more difficult with every passing day. Especially when every now and then, you think you see him glancing down at your lips whenever you lean in close to examine a detail of your work.

It’s more than likely that you’re imagining it, though.

Finally, the brush reaches his chin, finishing the outline of the first scar. You lean back to admire your work. After many instances of painstakingly painting on the scars and agonising over continuity, you don’t have to look at your old reference pictures to know the exact shape and curve of them, down to the millimetre. But you do so anyway, and smile in satisfaction when you compare today’s line to the pictures from the first time you drew them on him for practice. A perfect match.

“I know you’ve been working hard at it,” you continue assuring him, putting down the reference photos. “You’ve definitely come a long way.”

“Yeah, but I’m shit at it, actually. All those times we joked about how Eren would take forever to conjure a single tear every time he needed to cry, and now here I am in the exact same position. He’s going to rub this in my face should he ever find out.” He chews the inside of his cheek again, looking down. “Damn it. Don’t know what’s wrong with me today. I’m not… I don’t get nervous. I don’t show up to work feeling unprepared. That isn’t me. But today, it is.”

It’s unsettling, to see him so unsure of himself. His nerves are understandable, as he came into the show with more of a stuntman background and little actual acting experience. But anybody who’s worked alongside him could easily tell you just how dedicated he is to improving his craft, and that nobody else could play the Captain with the same quiet subtleties that Levi brings to the screen.

You hope your smile is somewhat reassuring to him. “And that’s okay. You know, crying on command really isn’t easy. I’ve worked with countless actors and many also find it difficult.” In your experience, most actors need a while to work themselves up to cry. The most obvious exception is Armin, who has the unnerving ability to turn it on and off like a light switch. “For you, all you need to do is make one tear out of one eye. You’ve managed to do that before, right?”

He nods, but the firm clench of his jaw and the crease between his brows don’t fade.

“So, it’s nothing that you haven’t practiced. And on the off chance that you can’t do it today, that’s perfectly fine. I have eyedrops in my bag.”

“Yeah, but…” He shakes his head in frustration. “This is going to sound dumb, but it… I don’t know, that feels like cheating. I know you’re thinking I’m being an idiot, and I probably am. I know eyedrops are common practice. It’s just… This is my character’s last moment before the epilogue, and I want it to be real. I don’t want to take the easy way out.”

“No, it’s not stupid. There’s no shame in needing to use eyedrops if you end up not being able to cry today, but it’s really admirable that you want to do it as authentically as possible. I think that since this is your final scene, and so many people are returning this morning, it’ll be easier than usual to muster up those tears.” Reaching for a set of different brushes and paint, you instruct him, “here’s what we’re going to do. I need you to just listen whilst I do the rest of your scars. I don’t want you to get trapped in your head about this, okay? Overthinking will just make it harder to get into character. Isn’t that what you said to Mikasa all those years back? It worked wonders for her. I often forget that this show was her first ever gig, with how good she’s become.”

He scoffs. “Really? You’re using my own words against me?”

“Well, what use is your own advice if you can’t follow it yourself?”

After a moment of hesitation, Levi sighs in defeat and closes his eyes again. “Shit, you’re relentless. Fine, then. I’ll trust you.”

You get to work, drawing the outlines of the second scar parallel to the first, then the smaller ones on his other cheek. As you add in the details, such as the texture of the stitches, you remind Levi of another story that he himself told you. He’d never worked with horses before being cast in this show, and yet was one of the quickest learners. Unsurprisingly so, since he’s incredibly kinaesthetically intelligent. To this day, the cast insists he looks the most at ease atop a horse, only second to Erwin, who actually used to ride in his childhood. You remind him that every single time, his hard work has more than paid off.

Somewhere down the line, you go off topic. Levi makes no move to stop you. In fact, he seems content just to listen to you talk about anything, everything. As the wounds take shape on his face, you reminisce on anecdotes from set, on the time the two of you spent together. With fondness, you recall your first meeting. Back then, you were an lowly assistant on the SFX team, transforming an unassuming man into the wounded soldier who, in his dying moments, listened to the Captain’s vow to eradicate the titans and bring meaning to his sacrifice. You talk about how the two of you grew closer during the filming of the second season, when Levi had a lot more free time to talk. How difficult the third season had been to film due to both of you being spread thin by additional responsibilities.

You skim over that time Levi mentioned you in an interview when asked about a favourite memory on set, and how warm it made you feel. You don’t talk about how you’d genuinely teared up after watching the final cut of the scene where Hange discovers a half-dead Levi by the riverbank, despite knowing that his ‘injuries’ were nothing more than your own handiwork.

And, with your heart clenching painfully, you certainly don’t dare to bring up the almost-kiss at last year’s cast and crew Halloween party.

———

“Cut! Perfect! Aaand that’s a wrap for Levi!”

The set erupts into thunderous applause. You clap heartily alongside the rest of the cast and crew. A deafening symphony of whoops and cheers fills the air, and if not for the growing lump in your throat, you’d join in too.

A standing ovation. Levi deserves it and more. Just as you expected, every angle the director wanted to capture had needed one take each, not a single one more. No eyedrops needed.

From your position, you can see Levi still sitting by the rock. Strangely, he makes no move to get up. Curious as to why, you peer past some crew members that had moved in the way, but you’re greeted with a sight that pulls at your heartstrings. Your eyes sting with new tears.

Curled up by the rock, Levi has his face buried in his hands, his shoulders heaving with quiet sobs.

Something in your chest aches. You knew that he would get emotional at the end—there was no way he wouldn’t, especially considering that his character cried too—but you didn’t expect him to feel so overwhelmed.

On instinct, your feet propel you towards him, but you’re promptly cut off by a few other crew members moving around. Through your rapidly blurring vision, you can only watch as several of the returning cast members rush forward from the smoke. Hange reaches him first, and pulls him into a bone-crushing hug. Erwin is second, kneeling next to the duo and rubbing Levi’s back comfortingly.

Sniffling, you quickly wipe away your tears, remembering suddenly that you still have something to do. Unnoticed, you slip away from set.

There is a tradition amongst the cast that whenever a character dies, the actor receives a bouquet of flowers from the cast and crew. (A size limit had to be enforced after a very emotional Gabi had presented Sasha with a bouquet so large it couldn’t fit through the trailer door.) For this final season, the tradition has expanded to gifting the actor a bouquet when they wrap, for the characters that survive all the way to the very end.

The door to Connie’s trailer is unlocked when you arrive, just as he said it would be. Inside, you find a vase full of vibrantly coloured flowers on the kitchenette counter in the exact spot where you’d left it earlier this morning. Several weeks ago, the cast and crew had all nominated you to put in the order for the bouquet and present it to Levi on his final day, and Connie had offered to help you hide it from Levi until it was time. Careful to not drip water all over the floor, you pick up the flowers and jog back to set.

The fog machines are being carried out by the time you return. You immediately scan the set for Levi, but it seems he has been completely buried under a massive group hug with the veterans cast, no doubt Hange’s doing. You can’t help but smile at the sight. Most of the crew members appear to be taking a break before clean-up, as it is the end of the day. The air is filled with chatter, but a hush descends upon the crowd as you approach.

The actors peel away from the hug one by one. A smiling Petra helps Levi get to his feet. The bandages on his face are halfway unravelled. With one hand, he yanks them off, leaving both of his eyes to gaze at you unobstructed, ablaze with an intense emotion you can’t quite place. With his other hand, he quickly wipes away the half-dried tears on his cheeks.

“On behalf of the cast and crew,” you say hoarsely, “I give you these.” You step forward and present him the bouquet. “It’s been an honour. Thank you for everything, Levi.”

His fingers gently graze yours as he takes the flowers from you. Tenderly, he holds them close to his chest.

“I was wondering where you went just now,” he says. Of course he’d noticed. “Should’ve known you’d be the one to give me this…” His voice wavers towards the end. He scoffs and wipes at his eyes. “And to think I was done blubbering like a baby. Damn it. You were right.”

He pulls you into a hug without a second thought.

———

Somehow, you’ve been roped into taking photos for everyone. Levi unwraps the bandages around his hand before he begins. He first takes a photo with the director and producer, who both thanking him dearly. They part with a handshake. Almost immediately after, the cast members of the Alliance, along with Eren and Zeke, all swarm forward for a big group photo. They’d all come to watch in support, even if several of them weren’t scheduled to come in today. Connie confesses that he’d helped hide the bouquet by letting you into his trailer. Levi makes a light-hearted remark that he should’ve figured that out too, considering Connie also helped hide Hange’s bouquet—which Levi himself had been responsible for ordering and retrieving.

The veteran actors come forward next. Fitting them all into the camera frame was a challenge, but you manage to do it after one of your makeup assistants finds you a stool. Somehow, Erwin manages to persuade Levi into doing the Scout salute with the rest of them. (“I just did it in the scene, though… Fine, I’ll indulge in your corniness for today, you dorks.”) When he presses his fist to his chest one last time, the veterans erupt into cheers.

Hange and Erwin both stay back for a little longer. The trio pose for more photos, all grinning widely, though you decide to put a stop to the mini-photoshoot when Hange attempts to pick Levi up bridal-style and almost drops him.

(“When I said ‘put me down’, I didn’t mean for you to drop me with no fucking warning!”

“I didn’t mean to drop you. Besides, I caught you, didn’t I? You’re fine, see?”)

After that fiasco, Levi asks to take one with the original Special Ops Squad, as it had been years since they’d managed to meet up.

Zeke comes back for another photo, slipping one arm around Levi’s shoulders. As you meet the taller man’s eyes over the top of his phone, he winks mischievously, holding two fingers up in bunny ears above Levi’s unsuspecting head. Say nothing, he mouths to you. With a herculean effort, you suppress your laugh. Zeke has made it his personal mission to photobomb every main cast member from the finale. After months of shooting, Levi is the last one standing, and it’s incredibly entertaining how hard Zeke tries to finish his mission, even now.

“Hand down, Zeke.”

“Damn it, how did you know?”

“You’re about as subtle as Reiner is when he pretends he hasn’t broken a prop.”

Zeke laughs. “Nothing gets past you, Levi, does it?”

As the two continue to playfully bicker, more jokes than actual verbal barbs, you open the photo you’d managed to take split seconds before Levi called Zeke out. “Mission accomplished,” you say, and a delighted Zeke reaches over Levi’s head to high-five you. Looking mildly betrayed, Levi whips his head back around to face you.

You grin sheepishly as you pass Zeke’s phone back to him, the photo on display. “Sorry. I had to help him.”

“Why are you two like this?” Levi says, shaking his head, barely holding back a smile. He and Zeke part after a hug and a promise to get drinks soon.

Levi’s promptly joined by Falco and Gabi, and after their photo is taken, he ruffles their hair affectionately, which makes Gabi yelp. He really has stepped into the ‘cast dad’ role, a development that you find endlessly endearing. Soon after, their parents arrive to take them home— the kids have quite an early start tomorrow to film their scenes with Annie and Kiyomi on the boat.

Jean and Connie take the chance to snatch a couple of selfies with him, before the latter asks if he could join them to film a TikTok for the show’s official account. To Levi’s utmost relief, it isn’t a dance challenge. Connie instead asks him a few questions about how he feels about the show ending, and what the show means to him—he’s putting together a montage of every cast member’s responses.

On the sidelines, just out of view, you watch Levi give his answers. An ember of warmth kindles in your chest.

Soon after, Levi’s approached by the stunt team, headed by an old friend of Levi’s from his stuntman days. She’d made a cameo in the third season as Kenny’s lieutenant. You happily take a group photo for them.

After you hand Caven’s phone back to her, Hange taps you on the shoulder, having finished catching up with the other cast members. You smile as they hug you tight, swaying on the spot; today is the first time you’ve seen them since they filmed their death scene a few months back.

“It’s so good to see you!” They say, linking arms with yours. “Sorry it took so long to come and find you.”

“Don’t worry! It’s lovely having you back. How are you finding your return?”

“It’s great! I’ve really been missing this, even though it hasn’t been that long.” They pout.

“Oh, we’ve all missed you too, Hange,” you say, smiling. “Have you been up to much since you left?”

“Well, I visited my dad for a bit, then I sent in an audition tape for this thriller movie that my agent thinks I’ll be a good pick for. I also got a few other offers, but I’m a little on the fence. I’ll consider those if I don’t get that thriller role, but who knows when I’ll hear back from them?”

“I bet you’ll get it. Thrillers are right up your alley.”

“You flatter me, dear,” They grin. “Anyways, I am here to say that you are the only one left who has not taken a picture with Levi. And that needs to change. The two of you need something to remember this day by!” You realise they’ve been guiding you towards the rock, where Levi, Mikasa, Armin and Eren are deep in conversation. The younger actors are laughing boisterously at something Levi had said, heads tilted back, sporting wide grins. Levi’s still cradling his bouquet carefully, a soft smile as he speaks, looking up at his younger cast mates with endearment. Your heart warms at the sight.

The quartet look up as you approach. The younger actors wave goodbye, disappearing into the crowd. Hange quickly ushers you and Levi together, their phone already out of their pocket. “Alrighty, here we go!” They cheer. “Oi, look lively now, Levi. It’s the last photo!”

“Was about time we did this,” you whisper to him as you come close. At first, you settle into your usual stance whenever you take a photo with a cast member, but Levi is not just any cast member. Not to you. Gnawing on your lip, you grapple with yourself for a fleeting moment. Your professional side barely puts up a resistance, and so you lean in to whisper a question. Briefly, you wonder what it would feel like to kiss the delicate shell of his ear. You banish the traitorous thought, best as you can.

“Hey, can I put my arm around you for this?” As close as you and Levi have grown over the years, the two of you save your brief hugs for behind the scenes, in private. Physical affection is rare with him otherwise—whilst the cast tend to be very touchy with one another, Levi is usually seen on the sides, watching them with a quiet fondness in his eyes. That hug from earlier—it had to be a fluke, right?

And yet, he sighs, and bridges the small gap between you. His free arm moves behind you, a warm, firm hand comes to rest at your back. “You don’t have to ask, you know,” he murmurs in return. “I hugged you earlier, didn't I? Quit worrying. Go ahead.”

Warmth blooming inside you, you lean sideways towards him on impulse. You slide your own arm behind him, and Levi leans into your touch. “Just so you know,” he continues, “it was an honour working with you too.”

Hange starts to count down from three. A wave of emotion hits you, almost sweeps you off your feet. This is it. Your last day of working with him.

Still so much left unsaid.

Straining to keep your composure, you offer a wide, bright smile for the camera.

———

The next few hours are spent tidying and cleaning up. Most of the actors have gone home, but Levi stays behind to help out the crew, as he always does without fail. With how emotionally taxing the day had been, it’s a wonder he didn’t go back to his trailer immediately to crash. As if you couldn’t admire him any more.

Your eyelids are heavy by the time you finish up and arrive at Levi’s trailer. When you enter, he is slumped in a chair in front of the vanity mirror, already changed out of his costume.

Neither of you say a single word as you carefully wipe away the scars and the grime. Your traitorous hands linger for a split second too long whenever they brush against his smooth skin. In his stormy eyes are that same intense look he’d given you when you first appeared with the bouquet.

You wonder what it means.

Sooner or later, one of you will have to break this fragile silence. Levi decides to take the matter into his own hands, catching you off guard. “I guess this is it.”

The sting in your eyes returns with a fierce vengeance. You turn away for a moment, rapidly blinking your oncoming tears away. An invisible vice clamps down, mercilessly clenching your chest.

You choke on your words, but you get them out somehow. “I’ll miss you.” Not the three words you’ve been yearning to say for the last year, but it will have to do. “I’m going to miss you. So much. It’s been…” You wrack your brain, but there is no singular adjective you know of that could truly describe the past few years working on this show with him. “You know what I mean. Right?”

“I know what you mean.” Levi stands, turning to face you properly. The troubled crease between his brows return. “Look, I… I have to tell you something. Hear me out?”

Your heart thunders in your chest. You nod. “Yeah. Of course.”

His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows. “Remember this morning? I said I was satisfied with my work here. That I have no regrets.”

Barely able to breathe, you can only manage to nod.

“But that isn’t true. Not really. There is one thing I regret,” he says, slowly, cautiously.

Voice barely a whisper, you ask. “What is it?”

“That we never talked about what almost happened at Halloween last year.”

The world comes to a halt.

Dimmed lights. Bass reverberates through your bones. The aftertaste of a Bloody Mary lingers on your tongue. Levi is just centimetres away, his chest almost flush with yours. His eyes valiantly fight to stay focused on the intricate titan-shifter makeup on your cheeks, before he gives in and his line of sight drops to your lips. Unconsciously, he leans in slightly, seemingly gravitating towards you.

Devastating. That is the first word that comes to your mind. It is high time you realise that he will be the end of you; he could ask anything of you and you’d do it. Your heart beats for him.

Caught in his orbit, your face tilts towards his.

A drunken crew member barges past, jostling your shoulder. You yelp, stumbling to the side, before Levi’s hands—warm, steady, safe—catch you. The spell broken, he lets go the moment you are upright, averting his eyes from yours. Levi takes a step backwards—a small one, because there is barely any space in the corner of the room the two of you are tucked into. But to you, he suddenly feels so distant, that he might as well be on the other side of the universe.

“I need some air,” he says, stoic mask falling back into place. Before you can ask him what’s wrong, Levi turns on his heel and disappears into the crowd, taking all the warmth of the room with him.

No. This is dangerous territory. Since that night, the two of you had constructed an unspoken agreement to pretend nothing had ever happened. Levi had never made any impression that it was anything other than a drunken lapse in professionalism. For a while, you wondered if he even remembered that moment, or if it had all been in your head, a result of you projecting your own desires onto him.

Regardless, he had never brought it up. You’d been content to do the same. It was—and still is—impossible to fathom that Levi would ever want you.

“Tell me,” he says hoarsely, “that I wasn’t imagining things that night, and every day since. Tell me I’m not imagining that you’ve been looking at me like…”

Your breath hitches in your throat. “Like what?”

“Like that!” He snaps. His hands tremble in a way you’ve never seen before as he gestures towards you, voice tinged with desperation. “Like how you’re looking at me right now. I-I don’t know how I didn’t see it sooner. Because if I had… maybe I would’ve…”

The staggering realisation of what he’s trying to say sinks in.

Choking back a sob of relief, you reach out for his hands, and he offers them to you with no resistance. A light blush sweeps across his face as he stares at your interlocking fingers with something akin to wonder.

Breathlessly, you dare to ask. “Do you mean it? That if you had known how I felt, you… you would’ve kissed me?”

“Yes. I would’ve. I wanted to, more than anything.” With that, Levi finally looks up from your joined hands. The burning look he’s been giving you all throughout today—you recognise it, now, plain and simple.

His earlier words ring in your mind. I don’t know how I didn’t see it sooner.

“Oh, Levi,” you whisper.

He continues on. “And if I had known how you felt, I wouldn’t have upped and left you like that. I was being a shitty coward, for running away and pretending it never happened, and never giving you an explanation when you deserved one. I was scared, I think, of ruining what we already had. You didn’t imagine anything on my part, it happened, and you didn’t do anything wrong that night… I’m sorry.”

Smiling, you squeeze his hands; warm, steady, safe. “You aren’t imagining things on my end either. I’m in love with you, and have been for a while now.” You don’t need him to say those precious words back for now—Levi’s endearingly clumsy attempt at confessing means more to you than he’ll ever know. “And I forgive you for running out on me that night. We both thought it didn’t mean anything to the other person. For so long, I thought that even if you did, things would never work out, that today would be goodbye, because I have a new contract on the other side of the country, and you’ll be going back to stunt work, a-and…” Your voice trembles, so you force yourself to stop, and breathe.

“It will work. I swear it, I’m not saying goodbye to you. I don’t care what’s coming next, we can make it work.” He seems to muster his resolve, tugging you closer. “No more dancing around this like idiots. We have enough lost time to make up for.”

Smiling so widely your cheeks ache, you playfully poke his cheek. “Well, you can always begin with the kiss you owe me, yeah?”

“You smart-arse.” Levi chuckles, before gently cupping the back of your head with his hand. In a swift movement, he leans in and captures your lips with his.

It’s nothing short of divine.

Levi kisses you with years worth of yearning behind it. His other hand moves to cradle your face, thumb brushing against the curve of your cheek, wiping away a stray tear of happiness.

Eyes fluttering shut, you deepen the kiss. Tongues move in tandem, and it isn’t long before hands begin to roam, exploring the terrains of each other’s bodies with an almost innocent curiosity. Heat simmers underneath your skin, a carnal flame yearning to be stoked, to devour.

For now, though, you’ll have to temper it.

Coming up for air, you close your eyes, resting your forehead against his. As much as you desperately want him, you don’t want your first time having sex with Levi to be in a trailer on set, with multiple crew members still milling around outside and packing up for the day. You tell him as such, and he murmurs his agreement after kissing you once more.

“Glad we’re on the same page about that, so…” Realising what you’re about to say next, you choke back a grin at your own cheesiness. “You wanna go back to your place or mine?”

Levi rests his forehead on your shoulder and chokes back a laugh. “Fuck, that’s such a cliché line.”

You roll your eyes good-naturedly. “Yeah, yeah, laugh all you want, but the question still stands.”

He looks up at you, mirth dancing in his eyes. “Yours, then.”

The time spent packing up and driving back to your home crawls by agonisingly slowly. The moment the two of you cross the threshold onto your home, he’s closing the gap between the two of you, kissing you breathless, thoughtless, until only your longing for him remains. So much so that you almost forget to stop and get a condom out from your drawer—in fact, Levi has to remind you.

The rare few times you had allowed yourself to think about it, you’d pictured Levi as a tender lover, gentle despite his coarseness. He is all this and more. At his fingertips, you come alive. As he makes love to you, laughs and sweet nothings fill the air between the deep kisses you share. You should’ve expected just how generous he can be in bed, but it still takes you by surprise, the way he worships your body with a deep-rooted reverence, determined to pleasure you over and over. In turn, you reciprocate eagerly, honoured that Levi trusts you to take care of him in return, that he is so readily vulnerable with you.

Once the two of you are finally, utterly spent, Levi nudges you awake before you can fully slip into a deep doze, cosy and comfortable in his embrace. “Hey. Gotta clean ourselves up, sleepyhead.”

You chuckle drowsily, and miraculously muster up the strength to crawl out of his arms, out of the warm sheets. “The bathroom is just down the hall,” you yawn, trudging towards a cupboard not the other side of your room. “You can shower first whilst I change the sheets and find you a towel and some spare clothes, ‘kay?”

“Or,” Levi says, voice hoarse with the same kind of contented exhaustion that makes you yearn to curl up beneath the sheets in his arms, “you could come with me.” He pulls you back in, peppering gentle kisses along your neck and shoulder, which tickle slightly.

Euphoric, you close your eyes and laugh. “Okay.”

Showering together is an incredibly sweet, domestic affair. Long after you’ve rinsed off all the lather, you’re both hesitant to leave the warmth of the running water, content to cling onto each other and relish in the feeling of skin against skin.

After the two of you dry off and change the sheets, you climb into bed. Half awake and basking in each other’s presence, you pull him close, nestling your head on his chest. When was the last time you had felt so cherished, so happy?

Sleep claims you swiftly, but not before Levi kisses the top of your head and tells you what you already know:

“I’m in love with you, too.”

———

Several weeks later

The wrap party is well underway by the time you and Levi arrive.

The lights are dim, and the music reverberates through your bones. Levi’s hand finds a home in the curve of your waist as he guides you through the crowd of drunken cast and crew members. His touch anchors you, and you find yourself smiling giddily.

After helping yourself to a cocktail, the hours fly by. Apparently, the entire cast plus half of the crew (including all of the makeup assistants under your command) had been rooting for you and Levi to get together. Tonight when you finally revealed you were in a relationship with him to your juniors, you were subjected to an intense barrage of questions. This, however, paled in comparison to Hange’s reaction when Levi held your hand in front of their very eyes—they’d launched an interrogation so brutal you wonder why they didn’t enter law enforcement instead.

Soon after escaping Hange’s interrogation, you two both get another drink. “Everybody seems far too invested in this development than they should be,” you sigh, still frazzled. “How long do you reckon they’ve been shipping us?”

A look of exasperation flits across Levi’s face. “I don’t know, and I hate that I even know what ‘shipping’ means in this context. Also, I saw Zeke give Erwin money when Hange was drilling us. Fuckers had some kind of bet running on us. Don’t even wanna know how long that had gone on for.”

You tip your head back and laugh. “Colour me unsurprised. That sounds very on-brand for Zeke and Erwin. You know, I think I saw Armin and Connie do the same. Guess Armin’s not as angelic as he looks.”

“That’s been known, sweetheart. The kid’s a menace in disguise.” He kisses your cheek. “Just like you, actually, now that I think about it.”

Playfully, you swat him away. “Hey, who are you calling a menace?”

Eventually, the two of you find yourselves catching some air outside, needing a moment to sober up and recalibrate after a whirlwind of social interaction. Levi’s hand returns to your waist and tugs you closer to him, seeking out your warmth. Melting into his touch, you do you best to commit the feeling of his embrace to memory. Soon, you’ll move away for a few months for your next contract, but you no longer fear it. Levi had sworn to you that this would work out, and there is nobody’s word you trust more than his.

Your love for each other has endured for years in the past. A handful more months is nothing.

Levi shifts slightly to get a better look at you, and cups your cheek. Meeting his gaze, your heart stops; his eyes are a breathtaking silver in the moonlight. Easily the most expressive feature he has, you could get lost in them for hours.

Caught in his orbit, your face tilts towards his.

This time, Levi meets you halfway.

Do not repost, modify or claim as your own work.

Masterlist

#levi ackerman #levi ackerman x reader #levi x reader #levi ackerman x you #levi x you #levi ackerman x y/n #levi x y/n #aot x reader #attack on titan x reader #snk x reader #shingeki no kyojin x reader #reader insert #x reader #gender neutral reader #aot actor au #actor levi x makeup artist reader

786 notes · View notes

another-lost-mc · 6 months

Text

candy prompts: leviathan + spicy + spooky

leviathan is your biggest fan. he doesn't realize that you're his biggest fan too.

pairing: leviathan x siren!gn!reader

content: nsfw. monster!au (reader is a siren). leviathan has two cocks. implied oral sex (levi receiving).

word count: 1k omg how did this happen

a/n: I like to imagine that aquatic races of the devildom worship and totally want to bang the grand admiral.

This isn't the way tonight's backstage meet & greet with one of his favourite idols was supposed to go.

Levi bought the most exclusive package as soon as the pre-sale link arrived in his Dmail. On the day of the concert, he put on a t-shirt featuring your logo, and he even shrugged on the new zip-up hoodie that he bought in the VIP section before the show. He waited in line with the other backstage pass holders so he could get an autograph and photo with you. Some of the lust demons in line ahead of him were radiating pheromones so strongly that it made his mind groggy, and he shook his head to dissipate the fog of giddy excitement that permeated the air around him.

When it was finally his turn to see you, the other fans had already been escorted away by security. He glanced at you nervously from under the hood he pulled over his head to conceal his identity; it wasn't a secret that the Avatar of Envy was a fan of Devildom's top idols, but he didn't like the unwanted attention from randoms in the crowd.

He handed you his poster and backstage pass to sign and he hoped the tremor in his hands wasn't too noticeable. The black marker squeaked against the thick paper and plastic. You smiled at all your other fans earlier, but even from his place at the back of the line, Levi thought your smile looked forced and insincere. He would know-he's forced that same expression on his own face countless times.

"Th-thanks," he mumbled when you handed him his autographed merch. He cradled them delicately in his arms so that they wouldn't get wrinkled or torn.

"Fans can get a selfie too," you reminded him with a gentle smile. "But maybe we can find a nicer backdrop than this grungy hallway. What do you say?"

Levi glanced around nervously. The security crew that loitered in the area earlier had vanished. There was something enticing about the teasing glint in your eyes but he blinked and the look was gone. He took a deep breath, not realizing how close he was standing to you. When did you get so close? The scent of your fragrance and sweat was staggering and he forced himself to stand still and avoid the temptation to lean even closer. He hesitated for only a moment before nodding.

You beamed wildly and grabbed his hand; he gulped as your fangs tipped over the curve of your lips. "Perfect," you purred before leading him down a dark hallway. "My dressing room is this way."

You were kind enough to take his precious memorabilia and set them down safely before shoving him against your dressing room door. Your lips crashed against his while your hands reached into his sweat-slicked hair. You slid the hood down and cradled his jaw so you could tease the skin of his neck with your fingernails. He broke the kiss with a gasp, and you didn't hesitate to slip your tongue into his mouth and flick it against his before pulling back with a very satisfied smirk.

"I recognized you the moment you stood in line," you admitted, voice quivering with excitement, glassy-eyed and pupils blown wide. "The Avatar of Envy, the Grand Admiral himself, coming to see me perform? I'm flattered."

Levi stared at you like he was seeing you for the first time. Maybe he was seeing the real you for the first time, the version none of your other fans knew existed. In the privacy of your dressing room you could finally be yourself. The magic that concealed your oceanic heritage slid off you like a veil and revealed your secrets to the demon you worshipped like a god. He was entranced. When he licked his lips to chase the taste of your kiss, it reminded him of salt water and the ocean breeze.

You preened under his curious scrutiny, satisfied that he was captivated by you as much as you were of him. When you realized you had his silent approval to continue, you unzipped his sweater and pushed it down his arms. It fell into a heap on the floor at his feet, but he didn't seem to care.

By the time you settled on your knees before him, the delicate pattern of pearlescent scales replaced your once-smooth skin and frilly gills appeared on the sides of your neck. You gazed at him innocently, your third eyelid blinking quickly over your lovestruck eyes as you nuzzled against the bulge in his jeans. Dainty fingers with long nails flicked open the button at his waistband. You bit your bottom lip between rows of jagged teeth and eagerly tugged down the short zipper next. Both his cocks sprung free when you slid his boxers down. He was panting heavily above you, and you licked your lips with a forked tongue, smirking when his eyes followed the movement.

"I've wanted to meet you in person for so long, sir," you whispered reverently. His cocks twitched when your lips imbued his title with just a hint of lust, and you couldn't resist the urge to touch him anymore. You kissed the tip of one of his cocks and smeared precum across your mouth with a satisfied hum, lapping at the salty taste as your mouth watered, eager for another taste. One of your hands curled delicately around the other cock and squeezed him lightly in your grip. He moaned loudly when your webbed fingers began stroking him in a soft, slick rhythm.

"I think I might be your biggest fan," you confessed in a breathy whisper before closing your eyes and finally taking his cock into your mouth.

read more: halloween 2023 masterlist || obey me masterlist

#obey me #obey me leviathan #obey me leviathan x reader #leviathan x reader #leviathan smut #obey me smut #obey me x reader #x reader #gn!reader #cw monsterfucking #trick or treat 2023

604 notes · View notes

kissatoru · 6 months

Text

𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐘 𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐍𝐘𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐍!

🪦 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎 ⭑ to celebrate spooky season and reaching 400+ followers (oh my god?! thank you so much?!), i’ve decided to do a mini halloween smut event !! since i’m starting quite late in the month, the event may be moved further into november if i need more time.

💀 𝐃𝐄𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐒 ⭑ all fics will be sub!character x dom!reader with a spoooky~ halloween twist! the reader’s anatomy and position (top/bottom) will vary depending on the fic. more content info will be added once the fic has been posted. the tag for this event is #( ★ ) hornyween ‘23.

please remember to read the warnings and, as always, do not interact if you are under 18 !!

🕸️ 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ⭑ the form for the taglist is here. if you have trouble accessing the link, feel free to dm me or reply to this post with which fic(s) you’d like to be tagged for.

please note that you must be 18+ and have your age or an indicator of it somewhere on your blog or you will be blocked!

☆ 𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐒 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 ☆

🩸 OUR LITTLE SECRET ; levi ackerman [ ✓ ]

content. sub!vampire!levi, dom!gn!reader, implied virgin/touch-starved!levi, ooc levi at some points cause of vampire hormones, plot before porn, blood/blood-drinking kink, oral fixation, dry humping, handjob, inappropriate use of cravats, petnames (dearest, darling)

synopsis. in 19th century society, everyone has secrets they want to keep from seeing the light of day — so what will happen when you unveil levi’s?

🦴 BAD DOG ; toji fushiguro [ nov. ??? ]

content. bratty sub!bottom!werewolf!toji, mean dom!top!gn!reader, size difference, degradation kink + more ...

synopsis. stories and fables always warn of the big bad wolf, but personally, you think he makes quite a cute pet.

🫀 INSATIABLE ; keigo takami [ nov. ??? ]

content. sub!incubus/succubus!keigo, dom!gn!reader, multiple orgasms, overstimulation + more ...

synopsis. lust demons are known for their hunger, but when one visits you in the night, your appetite turns out to be larger than his.

🪞 PRETTY GIRL ; mitsuri kanroji [ nov. ??? ]

content. sub!mitsuri, soft dom!ghost!gn!reader, modern au, mirror sex, praise kink, cunnilingus + more ...

synopsis. strange paranormal encounters have mitsuri considering moving out — until an encounter unlike the others persuades her to stay.

#divider by benkeibear #divider by cafekitsune #kinktober #dom reader #sub character #sub levi #sub toji #sub hawks #sub mitsuri #sub aot #sub jjk #sub mha #sub bnha #sub kny #( ★ ) hornyween ‘23.

442 notes · View notes

levmada · 2 months

Text

every—lesser known—canon fact about Levi Ackerman.

infamously over the years, there have been countless false rumors about Levi in particular out of the cast. many of them have become popular, even ubiquitous, and it's annoying!

and also disheartening when you find out it's not true....

and hurtful when you realize it was - sometimes - made up by trolls.

so i'm making this post<3

credit to @levisfavoriteacup for the idea!!

*disclaimer: i'm not perfect, so this may not be Everything™️ but I am confident that it's the majority of information available, and that it's trustworthy. :)

First the most populars. There is no evidence across interviews nor other content over the years that:

Levi is ugly, and is considered ugly in AOT.

Nope. See here: (tumblr link), or:

Isayama finished his first sketch of Levi mostly on a whim, but the moment he drew his face, he had a sense it would work well / he knew he had something good. Something told him: "the yaoi fangirls are going to like this one".

As time passed and his popularity grew, Isayama caught onto this and wanted to portray him more attractively (in multiple ways) to the viewer/reader.

But from the beginning, this was something of the goal. He is short because Isayama had in mind what young women/fangirls in Japan consider attractive: a man with a higher-pitch voice; has a small face; and who is "short but strong".

In the world of AOT, he (in a nutshell) is mostly considered plain or awkward, but combined with his reputation and style, he's very charming. "He cleans up nice." Overall, it is positive :) But more importantly, realistic I think.

He's also something of a celebrity. People who advertise their product as being used by him are more successful; when he's seen in a shop, this by itself is considered "advertising" and more people come in. Quote: ""the tea that the hero bought”".

He's definitely not a 2/10 at any rate😇.

—the 24th episode of Naoki Yoshida's Anime Plan, 2013 / Interview with Frau Magazine, 2013 | Hajime Isayama x Hikaru Suruga (2014) | AU Smartpass - Erwin & Levi Close Up Interview Part 1 | Taking shelter from the rain reprise: Levi and Peaure

Levi’s type would be someone who’s "tough, feminine and sensual".

Levi's type "might" be tall people. But context matters, because in multiple translations "don't you think?" and "might be" are thrown around a lot. Isayama isn't known for his clarity. When asked, he practically said the question right back. —fan Q&A from a festival in Betsumaga, Aug.2014

What this quote might have come from is a statement by the author of an article Isayama was likely involved in. I can't say this is 100% canon, but in my opinion it's a little less canon than the Smartpass AUs; if those are sub-canon, then this is sub-sub-canon:

Levi's romantic type is someone who walks three steps behind him, and likes cleaning.

In the past, in Japanese culture, for a wife to walk three steps behind her husband implied highly traditional gender roles. What this is much more likely to mean is that Levi's romantic type is someone who will let him protect them, or will run away and survive even if it costs his life. (And they have to like cleaning.)

—the article is from 2013, and no longer exists. but the link was used as recently as 2021 as a source in this post by a reliable translator. I've found this quote also in varying qualities of translation across Japanese and English forums, so to the best of my knowledge, it's reliable.

Levi's cravat is a piece of his mother's dress + he was wearing her dress when Kenny found him.

This is a popular rumor that Isayama has never confirmed (i think it is true, tho.)

December 25th was chosen by his comrades because he doesn't know his actual birthday.

The guidebook only states that it is his birthday. I can't find any more context on this. —AOT Guidebook; p.256

His character profile:

—AOT Guidebook; p.78–79

His name is Hebrew, and means "attached" or to be "joined".

Isayama came up with Levi's name after watching American documentary "Jesus Camp". (It's about a summer camp-type program where evangelical Christian children are taught extreme beliefs. One of the children was named Levi.) Isayama heard it and thought it sounded cool. —Hajime Isayama x Hikaru Suruga (2014) | 2010 blogpost by Isayama

Levi is in his early 30s (in s3/RtS/volume 19). –Interview, Universal Studios Japan’s SNK THE REAL exhibition, 2016 | confirmation

If Kuchel was still alive, Levi would want to make sure she had an easy life. This means specifically filial piety, a concept exclusive to the East: he would fulfill his duties as a son for her. (tldr he's a mama's boy :3) —Bessatsu Magazine, 2019

Levi would have thin facial hair, but he prefers not to, so he shaves frequently. —January 2020 issue of Bessatsu Magazine (chapter 124)

He doesn't like coffee milk or coffee jelly. They're out of the question even.🤐 —July 2018 issue of Bessatsu Magazine (chapter 106)

He just gets depressed when he drinks coffee. Maybe he loves tea that much? He stopped calling Hange names like 'shitty glasses' since they became commander because he "seems" to respect their position that much. However, a Smartpass story delves deeper into this (and states as I suspected): [After Hange makes a joke] "Since becoming the commander succeeding Erwin, they’d toned down on their past speech and behaviour that had a touch of tomfoolery; Levi understanding that they were nevertheless trying to maintain the self “that was the case then”, also loses the will to curse at them." + "In the past, Hange had a Hange-type dream, and should have been progressing to that purpose. That lately, was it the weight of the office of commander, or was it due to the reality that is “all the world was our enemy”, their manner had changed considerably." —May 2017 issue of Bessatsu Magazine (chapter 92) | Goodnight. Sweet dreams, dear. Act II: Levi

If he and Kenny had fought one-on-one, Levi would've won. —December 2016 issue of Bessatsu Magazine (chapter 87)

intermission: all about tea

His favorite "food" is black tea. No actual food.

He doesn't add sugar or milk to his tea because he considers it too expensive—which it is canonically. Despite this, he will share his tea with his comrades (his original squad as far as is seen).

Even though he's Captain, he'd rather drink it straight (the implications of which are he's a hardworking man, like that of a farmer. aka, this makes him seem humble).

If a time of peace ever came, Levi wants to open a black tea shop (he said in a dreamlike way, not so much based in reality).

He also knows a good amount of facts and history about it. He's a tea enthusiast!!

Levi receives pilfered tea in shipments monthly, thanks to Erwin.

—AU Smartpass - Erwin & Levi Close Up Interview Part 2 | Part 1 | Taking shelter from the rain reprise: Levi and Peaure | Bessatsu Magazine, Jan.2014 | September 2016 issue of Bessatsu Magazine (chapter 84) | AU Smartpass My First Time Around: Levi Ackerman | The Case of the Corps Tea Party - File No. 09 Levi's Side (3/3) | sugar and milk in tea from the Japanese perspective

Levi, out of his original squad, found Petra cute/sweet in the general sense of the word "kawaii". Like Levi's romantic type however, this was sort of a non-answer to the question (of whether Levi thought she was cute). —2014 interview

After RtS, Levi seems to consider Hange and the 104th his family. —AU Smartpass My First Time Around: Levi Ackerman

He wears a cravat because Isayama based part of his design off Rorschach from the movie 'Watchmen'. He looks "delicate" because of his size and weight, but he's so powerful because [in issues before the reveal of the Ackerman bloodline] of "invisible power" at work. —January 2016 issue of Bessatsu Magazine (chapter 76)

The best way to describe the way he thinks is to compare him to the main character from the movie The Hurt Locker (2008). His character was born from Hiei from the manga 'Yuyu Hakusho', and Rorschach from the movie 'Watchmen'. The former was the basis for his appearance (especially his eyes), and the latter was the basis for his personality. Firstly though, Isayama had an image of a small man being the strongest.

—Hajime Isayama x Hikaru Suruga (2014) / Brutus Magazine (2014)

He is something of a protagonist (especially in s3p1). — Animedia, June 2018

His favorite tool (in general...?) is microfiber cloths (for dust I guess. Levi has no need for weapons :3) —July 2015 issue of Bessatsu Magazine

He will usually laugh/smile when he sees convenient cleaning goods (i.e., vacuum cleaners? feather dusters? ((cuz he's a shorty?❤️)) —Bessatsu Magazine, Dec. 2013

He does want to be taller sometimes. He gets eager to clean up after meals rather than cook at all. He can cook, though. —Bessatsu Magazine, Aug.2014 | fan Q&A in Oyama, Oita, Mar.2018

Levi mostly couldn't adapt to the changes that came about after the truth was discovered. Only he wears mostly the same uniform, cape, and blades.

After RtS, Levi personally retrieved Erwin's remains himself, for whom there was a special memorial service. After Eren (inadvertently) called him a "tiny old man" in season 3, Levi didn't care, but when he thought of it by himself later, he was hurt (unclear exactly why). Levi's father, most likely one of Kuchel's customers, is an insignificant man who's short. That's where Levi's height comes from. His face comes from his mother. At the start of season 4, Levi didn't change much compared to the 104th because he's turning into an "old man" who'd rather stick with his flip phone so to speak. He "doesn't break out into cold sweats". AKA he's always calm under pressure. He considers prostitution to be an ordinary job because of his childhood. Levi's vision is very sharp, way above average. He thought Eren's new look beginning season 4 was unclean/dirty (in more ways than one perhaps). —fan Q&A in Oyama, Oita, Mar.2018

He has slight bouts of insomnia. He never snaps/explodes when he's angry. But he does get angry or grumpy a lot, in general. He doesn't sing. It's more likely he would dance. If he was a fan of Momoiro Clover Z (jpop girl group), his favorite would be Momoka. When/if he drinks, he has a high tolerance, but he can get a little drunk :) One thing he highly hates and fears is mold. He is the one who ordered Armin to dress as Historia during the uprising. His blood type is A. Blood types are much like horoscopes in Japanese culture, and Levi's is as such: kichōmen, or well-organized; he likes keeping things neat, but can be stubborn and stressed out easily.

Whether he eats enough or has a good diet? He is "a bit lax". Maybe he forgets to eat sometimes, or has a low appetite. When Levi bathes, he goes for a quick shower then soak in hot water, which takes about ten minutes. Like a bird :')) He on any given night gets about 2-3 hours of sleep. He thought Eren was the best at cleaning (in season 3 / uprising arc). Because of his childhood in the Underground, Levi has a preoccupation/obsession with cleaning (specifically to ward off disease). He also doesn't have any pajamas, mostly keeping day clothes on when he goes to sleep - which is in "his" chair. Levi cuts his own hair using clippers. (Something like:)

He's aware Oluo imitated him, and found it annoying. Levi's horoscope (in general) as a Capricorn: Humanity’s Strongest Soldier - Levi. He possesses warmth in the midst of a dispassionate nature, and he is capable of leadership without verbal expression – both of which are special qualities of a Capricorn. Capricorns tend to hold certain levels of authority, even if they must carry out somewhat unreasonable tactics while in such positions. But when such authority is backed up with actual abilities, a Capricorn can gain Levi’s type of confidence and also be put on a pedestal by those around them. However, Capricorns won’t be dependent on others, much less trust them easily. They don’t hold high expectations and thus never feel a sense of failure. Levi’s faults include the inability to express himself clearly. Even though he wants to encourage his companions, he always speaks in a roundabout way, and without Hanji’s translation it’s nearly impossible to understand Levi’s intended meaning. Even though he is dependable in most situations, when it comes to love/romance, he expresses himself clumsily/awkwardly. —FRaU Magazine, Aug.2014. | fan Q&A in Oyama, Oita, Mar.2018 | Levi: Close-up Report (Part One) | Translator *the horoscope wasn't written by Isayama, but was published alongside canon information, and it's also not factually wrong, so I'm including it.

The dark circles under Levi’s eyes are to convey the “self-destruction” he takes on to reach the “standard” of Humanity’s Strongest. —Interview on the topic of Levi, May 2015

His 'liege'—as Eren is to Mikasa, and Uri is to Kenny—is Erwin. He is afraid of making deep relationships because of the cruel world he lives in; he can't know when someone he cares for will die or how soon. That 'gap' left in Levi's heart by Kenny's death was filled by his squad (the 104th). If Levi hadn't joined the Survey Corps, he would've been a "very irresponsible person". Risky with his life perhaps? As a kid, Levi used to make himself stronger in order to receive praise from Kenny. When he abandoned him, he wondered what his strength was even for. He was able to find peace with Kenny after his death. In CH72, the reason Levi kicked the shit out of Eren and Jean is because of his argument with Erwin earlier.

He knows he's a slave to his own strength, aka the idea of being a hero. He realizes it when Kenny asked what he's a slave to in s3/ch69. —Answers Guidebook, Aug.2016

If he ever changed his appearance, the one thing Levi couldn't be able to give up is his undercut :') He would grow out the top and tie it up :3 —Oyama homecoming event Q&A in 2014 | 2 | 3

Levi knows how to use a gun, but he "places more trust" in knives. —Bessatsu Magazine, 2019

Levi tolerates saunas. But instead of enjoying himself he seems to see it as a test of endurance. (LOL) —Bessatsu Magazine, 2020

Levi has newspaper-level handwriting that he practices often. He's very conscious of it and being connected back to the Underground. —AU Smartpass TEXT: Levi’s Signature

Isayama had considered killing Levi around the time of the thunderspear explosion. (As always) Isayama deliberated with his editors whether or not it'd be meaningful if he died, and they decided it wouldn't be. —Kawakubo interview, 2021

Specially, Levi holds his swords in a reverse grip "his own way" since he wasn't officially trained. —Illustrate Note Magazine, 2017

Levi forcefully bathes Hange by knocking them unconscious. —AU Smartpass - Erwin & Levi Close Up Interview Part 1

Levi is 4 at the time that Kuchel dies. —What the director informed Kamiya Hiroshi of on set

His character song is called "Dark Side of the Moon", found on YouTube here. Translated lyrics here.

how to draw Levi:

—AOT Guidebook; p.229 | +Illustrate Note Magazine, 2017

#please share... this took days of time and effort #levi aot #snk levi #snk levi ackerman #levi ackerman #levi attack on titan #captain levi #rivaille heichou #levi heichou #captain levi ackerman #levi rivaille #rivaille ackerman #aot manga #snk #levi art #levi shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #levi.thoughts

252 notes · View notes

humanitys-strongest-bamf · 8 months

Text

Stolen | Canonverse Angst Oneshot

✧ word count ➼ 1.3k ✧ notes ➼ canonverse, implied soulmates!au, angst, death, levi being in pain :(, all hurt no comfort, i'm not sorry, idk if this is any good but if i didnt post i was going to rip my hair out plus it gave me an excuse to make some sad sad gifs ✧ warnings: blood, death, canonverse-typical violence, prepare for sadness :)

Even successful expeditions were rarely anything to celebrate. There were generally too many people that died to really make any result worth it. Even if it did technically move humanity forward, the loss of human life always made victory seem somewhat sinister.

This expedition certainly didn't go well, but no one died, which was already something that was practically unheard of. Levi was able to easily account for everyone assigned to his flank, however he had no way of confirming the survival of the soldiers in the left flank—the one you had been assigned to.

Externally, he wasn't too worried. You were capable. Your squad was capable. However, competency and capability could only get you so far. That was how much of an advantage the Titans had over humanity.

Plus, he shouldn't even be having the selfish thought of wanting to immediately confirm your survival. You were supposed to be just another soldier. There was no reason as to why he should prioritize you over anyone else that had come onto the battlefield with him.

Levi sighed to himself as he blatantly told himself that lie. He knew it was a lie. He hated that it was a lie, but your relationship had long moved past the point of being professional.

He remembered the conflicting thoughts that stirred within him when he woke up next to you earlier that morning. The two of you had made a habit of going to see each other the night before an expedition, starting the night off with discussing your shared ire over the world you found yourselves living in before it quickly escalated into another form of stress relief that involved elated breaths and intertwined legs.

You'd see each other, sleep with each other, and then go on your separate ways. This morning was the first one in which Levi didn't immediately leave upon waking. He was usually quick to leave, occasionally electing to avoid staying the night entirely.

The only reason for this was that he didn't want to catch feelings for you. He knew it was a slippery slope, which was why he found himself so pissed that morning when he was forced to admit to himself that he did catch them. He could picture the exact moment that he had realized it. You were stirring in your sleep and a part of him longed for the idea of waking up to that one peaceful moment every day—with the sun shining through the window and you curling up against his chest.

It was just sex at first. It was a good stress relief and you were both easy on the eyes. He had consistently distanced himself emotionally, even on the few occasions in which you would ask him to stay for a while longer on especially stressful nights. He didn't want to get involved in a relationship when either of you could die at any moment, but it was getting harder and harder to stay away from you, and even harder to get himself to leave your bed in the mornings.

Sure, it was just sex—until it wasn't.

It was driving him nuts. He couldn't possibly see himself continuing this friends-with-benefits relationship with you, but he didn't want to cut you off either. He wanted, and needed more.

He had spent the majority of the lengthy ride back to Wall Rose strategizing over how to approach this. Levi had already made up his mind that he was going to bring up the idea of committing. He felt almost pressured to do so. He wanted you by his side, and not just as someone that was readily available whenever he needed to fuck.

He knew some type of celebration was going to occur once they got back to the Walls, given the fact that no one died. It helped keep morale up. He knew you hated how rowdy those could get, so he figured a good opportunity would be to walk you outside to finally have that talk, or maybe he could just go to you as soon as you were back within the Walls and the both of you could spare a minute to be alone.

Levi was sick of waiting and dancing around or avoiding the topic entirely. No matter what happened next, he was determined to show you that your feelings were reciprocated, and not by just a small amount. He couldn't rest until he took that next step to commit himself to being by your side.

~~~~~

Disaster struck. Of course disaster fucking struck. Levi should've anticipated this the minute he noticed that there were next to no Titans on his side of the travel formation.

There was a stench of blood and death in the air as soon as he reached the rendezvous point. The left flank had been ambushed by multiple aberrants. They were still in the process of searching for and retrieving survivors, but the preliminary conclusion was that nearly the entire left flank was wiped out.

Levi currently stood still, his eyes falling on a drape that covered a suspiciously familiar looking body. He was standing only about a foot or two away, with his hand hovering over the corner. All he had to do was lift it to confirm whether it was you or not, but he already knew.

The longer he held off from confirming it, the longer he could continue telling himself that you were okay, and that he can still hold onto the hope that he would still get that chance to tell you what had been brewing underneath the surface.

He took in an unsteady breath and forced himself to grab onto the drape, trying to contain his shaking.

Levi took an unsteady step back, dropping the drape as soon as he came into contact with your eyes, now lifeless.

Every single shared (and occasionally stolen) moment with you flashed through his mind. Those lifeless eyes of yours were once filled with mischief, pain, lust, glee, and hope. He remembered how annoyed he'd get with your tenacity, and how that tenacity ended up contributing to the fact that you were the only person that he felt like could really be competent on the battlefield against the Titans. Your competency was why, even after countless failed expeditions, his faith in you to make it back to the Walls was unwavering.

You had become an odd source of comfort for him. Even when he was actively denying his feelings for you, there was still a huge part of him that would feel safe around you. When he was with you, he wasn't Humanity's Strongest, he was just Levi, and that made you a source of stability in his life that he had been lacking elsewhere.

From the minute that he set eyes on you after you joined the Scouts, he knew that something was different about you, and that there was something drawing him to you. He avoided admitting it for years, and now that he did admit to it, it was too late.

A dark, but unreadable expression fell over Levi Ackerman's face.

He knew.

He had known this for years. He knew that his curse was that the moment that he decided that he wanted something was the exact moment that he lost it.

He knew that you were supposed to be here with him, alive and well, and not as a mangled corpse that resulted from their war with the Titans.

He finally recognized that it was you that was supposed to be by his side, but not in this lifetime—not anymore.

Your life—the life the both of you were supposed to share—had been stolen from him in the blink of an eye.

#: @chaotic-on-main @romantichomicide95 @levisbrat25 @leviismybby @moonmalice @averysmolbear @cathybarn @tclbts @belovedackerman @bejewelledd @sad-darksoul @ackermendick @aomi04 @apolloshaiku @laraackerman @pulpolicia @raenacreates @nube55 @roseofdarknessblog @saenora @noctemys @sixpennydame @sleepyfairyxo @heichoucleanfreak @svftackerman @levis-squishy-cheeks @dumbfound-princess @evas-leslas @kokosmiles @mrsmiagreer @catskze join my taglist! and pls pls lmk if you wanna be taken off :')

#levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackermann x reader #levi heichou x reader #captain levi x reader #levi angst #levi #levi ackerman #levi ackermann #levi heichou #captain levi #attack on titan #aot #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin #snk

205 notes · View notes

tightjeansjavi · 8 months

Text

Girl, I’ve never loved one like you

A/N: well, I have mixed feelings about this piece at the moment. I poured my heart and soul into this, and I hope everyone enjoys this story that truly touches home for me. In high school I always felt like an outcast because I wasn’t that girl that had a boyfriend, and I didn’t have dates to the school dances. I dreamed of having that magical prom night with the guy of my dreams. It never happened, and I moved on. Years later I sometimes wish I did get to experience that magical night. Well, now I get to, and it feels like a piece of my past is being healed. I know that not everyone will be able to relate to this experience, but I know there are those of you out there that will. Thank you for reading, and please be kind. 🩷

Pairing | AU high-school student! Joel Miller x high-school student! f! reader

~word count: 12.12k~

Summary: Senior Year, 1985, a month before prom and Joel Miller has yet to find himself a proper date, until he and Tommy stop in for a late night bite at your parents diner, and everything changes. Joel Miller gives you a prom night of your dreams that you’ll never forget…18 years later, you’re running into each other at the very same diner you first met.

Warnings: fluff, young love, meet-cute, injuries sustained from falling out of the bed of Joel’s truck, (please buckle up it’s the law) alcohol consumption, smoking, implied smut, right person wrong time, some negative feelings, reader gets harassed by a guy, Joel steps in, Joel is a total sweetheart, friends to lovers, no age gap, reader has no physical descriptions, reader’s nickname is darlin’ (+18) minors dni!

main masterlist

A truck door slams, gravel crunches under the weight of heavy worn boots as two teenage boys bicker.

“Ain’t you the least bit concerned about askin’ a girl to prom, Joel? It’s a month away, and you still haven’t asked a single gal? C’mon, what’s holdin’ ya back? Your mug ain’t as handsome as mine, but your charm oughta make up for it!” Tommy Miller was real good at getting under his brother's skin without even having to lift much of a finger.

“I ain’t concerned about findin’ myself a prom date cus’ I ain’t goin.’ It’s a silly dance that literally holds no personal value for me. I jus’ wanna graduate n’get out of this fuckin’ shit-hole town.” Joel gruffed a response back.

“Jus’ a silly dance? Brother, do ya hear yourself? It ain’t jus’a silly dance! For fuck sakes, it’s supposed t’be the night of our lives! One last hurrah before goin’ to college n’facin’ the real world.

The older by just a few months,Miller brother clenched his jaw tightly as he grinded his teeth together. He twirled his keys between his fingers absentmindedly. “Like I jus’ said, it’s jus’ a silly dance. Besides, even if I wanted to go, I ain’t have anyone in mind to ask. So can ya jus’ please drop it?” Joel grumbled as he grasped the handle to the diner door and swung it open.

“Well, that’s bullshit. I’m gonna make it my personal mission to find you a lucky gal to take to prom.” Tommy caught the edge of the door with his boot just as Joel tried to close it in his face.

“Yeah, lets not fuckin’ do that. I don’t need you findin’ me a prom date.” Joel snapped back as he shoved his hands deep into the worn out pockets of his worn out light-wash denim Levi’s.

Tommy snickered as he wrapped his arm around his brother's shoulder, “With an attitude like that, you ain’t gonna find a date. Dontcha worry, big brother, we’re gonna find ya a real nice gal.”

“I’m only a few months older than you, you fuckin’ hillbilly.” Joel grumbled under his breath.

“I’ll be with you boys in just a second! Do you want a booth or table?” You whizzed past the two brothers on your roller skates, holding a tray of burgers and fries above your head with ease. Your skates were light pink, with ruby red hearts stitched along the fabric. The laces were a creamy white color and there were three cherry-red heart beads on either side of the tied laces.

Joel cocked an eyebrow as you skated past without missing a step. He had half expected you to eat shit in those skates, but was thoroughly surprised that it didn’t happen. Even more so that the tray of food you were holding on the flat side of your palm, didn’t topple over.

“A booth would be great, thanks darlin.’” Tommy responded with a lopsided grin to which Joel immediately smacked him on the back of the head for.

“I thought you already asked Mackenzie Patterson to prom Tommy? I don’t think she’d appreciate it if she knew you were sendin’ heart eyes to another girl.” Joel lightly chuckled as he plopped down into the nearest booth that wasn’t occupied.

“Yeah, I did ask her but I wasn’t makin’ heart eyes at anyone.” Tommy flipped him off as he plopped down onto the other side of the booth.

“Uh-huh. Sure you weren’t.” Joel fought the urge to roll his eyes.

After grabbing two menus from the register, you glided over to your next customers with ease. It was easy work skating along the black and white checkered flooring. “Welcome to Patsy’s, here’s a couple menus for you, take your time, there’s no rush and whenever you’re ready, just give me a holler.” Your parents were more than willing to give you a job as a waitress at the diner they recently opened. You made decent tips, and for the most part, your job was pretty fun and easy-going for a highschool part-time job.

“Patsy’s, huh? Does that name hold any significant meanin’ to ya? Tommy inquired with genuine curiosity.

“Yeah, it’s actually named after my mom. It was my dad’s idea to name it after her. Pretty sweet, huh? Guess romance is truly alive and well.” Your response was light, and your smile was infectious. Joel didn’t want to admit it then, but your smile lit up the entire diner. It was brighter than the damn incandescent neon lights that flashed along the crystal clear windows.

“Romance is definitely alive and well. Awful sweet that your pops named this joint after your ma. Hey darlin’ you don’t happen to attend McCallum highschool, do ya? Never seen a pretty thing like you skatin’ around the halls.” Tommy effortlessly worked his sweet talk. It flowed out of his mouth like his own personal song. You already imagined that girls at school probably swooned at his very boots, just from his smooth Texas drawl alone.

It didn’t surprise you that a guy like Tommy Miller never noticed you in the passing period hallways. You kept to yourself for the most part. Being a teenager, let alone being a teenage girl was not easy in the slightest. You struggled to build friendships with girls in your class. They all would look at you funny when you participated in gym class, finished the homework on time and in their eyes, became the teacher's pet. You went to the mall with your mom and spent your weekends reading at home with your dog curled at your feet under a soft knitted blanket. You were happy..until you weren’t.

You couldn’t help but feel slightly envious towards the group of girls that went to the mall every Friday to buy a new outfit for whatever house parties were going on that weekend. You hadn’t even had your first sips of alcohol or tasted nicotine on your tongue. Truthfully? You felt like a loser because your highschool experience wasn’t exactly like the movies said it would be. Where the fuck was your Han Solo or Indiana Jones? Where was that one special guy to swoop in and sweep you off your feet, and single-handedly wipe out a quadrant of clone troopers with his blaster alone—

“Huh? Oh, highschool. Yeah, I’m a senior at Mccallum high.” You weren’t flustered over Tommy’s incessant style of flirting, you were flustered because you were thinking about Harrison fucking Ford.

“Don’t mind my brother. He’s a fuckin’ hillbilly, and our ma dropped him on his head when he was just an annoyin’ lil shit.” Joel’s eyes flitted up to yours over the top of the menu that was grasped between his hands. His Texas twang was deeper than his brothers, it had a distinguishable edge to it. Similar to the way that gooseflesh rises upon your skin when you hear something that is particularly delectable, and itches that figurative spot in your brain so good.

Did that make any sense? Who cares. All you could presently think about was how fuckin’ gorgeous this guy was. A total dreamboat, and you didn’t even know his name.

��It’s alright. I wasn’t offended or anything..but uh, can I get you guys something to drink maybe?”

“Yeah, you got any cherry cokes, darlin?’” Joel asked you casually.

“Cherry cokes? Yeah, of course! Coming right up.” You scribbled two cherry cokes onto your notepad before you skated away.

“That’s her.” Tommy uttered with a gleeful grin.

“What in the hell are you talkin’ about now?” Joel set his menu down with an annoyed sigh

“Brother, that’s the girl you’re goin’ to ask to prom.” Tommy gestured to the spot infront of the booth where you were just standing a few seconds prior.

“Her? No. I am not askin’ a total stranger to be my prom date.” Joel crossed his arms over his chest as he sank back into the cushioned seating of the booth.

“She ain’t a total stranger. She goes to our school! Never seen her around before, but does that really matter? She’s awfully pretty, and I bet you whatever I got in my wallet, she thinks you’re good lookin’ too. Take it from the guy who just knows what gals are interested in.”

“Do you ever fuckin’ think before you speak? Or does your brain not work the same way everyone else’s does? Again, she’s a stranger, and what makes you think she’d even want to go to prom with me, huh? Don’t be ridiculous Tommy.”

“No, you jackass. I just say whatever comes to mind and then make up the rest as I go. You’ll never know unless you try, big brother. Don’t act like I didn’t see the way you were lookin’ at her when she rode past in those skates. You were positively flabbergasted.”

“Yeah, cause I surely thought she was gonna eat shit on those things, and I was imagining the tray of burgers and fries smacking you right in your big-ass forehead.” Joel stifled a chuckle as Tommy leaned over the booth table and swatted his arm.

“You’re such a fuckin’ asshole sometimes I swear.”

“Yeah, well..you still love me so I can’t be that awful of a brother.”

Tommy was just about to reply with some snarky comment when you had skated back to the booth with two cherry cokes in hand, and placed them down in front of the brothers with two straws. “Are you guys ready to order, or do you need more time?”

“I think we’re all good here darlin.’ Thanks for bein’ a real peach. Now I’m gonna have the double bacon cheeseburger with crispy onion straws and a side of cheese fries..andmybrotherherewantstoaskyoutoprom.” Tommy blurted out suddenly, throwing you and Joel for a complete curveball.

Joel had just taken a sip of his cherry coke, and nearly spit it back into the cup as he glowered at his brother. He could feel the tips of his cheeks turning bright hot red as he sucked down a hefty sip of the sugary drink to hide his redness.

You felt like a deer in headlights as you scribbled down Tommy’s order as quickly as humanly possible. The heat was rising to your cheeks fast as you did your best to hide it. “Oo-Kay and for you?..”

“Jus’ a double cheeseburger and regular fries. Thanks, darlin.’” Joel presented you with his order without making eye contact as he was too busy thinking of all the ways he wanted to brutally murder Tommy with his bare hands. He was kind enough to grab both menus and hand them back to you with the tiniest reassuring nod.

“Coming right up!” You squeaked out before scurrying back to the kitchen area to put the order in.

“You’re fuckin’ dead, Tommy. Dead as a fuckin’ door nail I swear to god—”

“Look, I’m doin’ this for your own good Joel. You’re a sour puss, grumpy son of a bitch 99% of the time and you’re gonna grow a pair of goddamn balls and ask that girl out to prom. What’s the worst she could say? No? I don’t think she’s going to say no to you.”

“For fuck sakes..there’s a way to go about these things! Poor girl looked like a deer in fuckin’ headlights cus’ of your fuckin’ big ass blabber mouth.”

“A cute deer though.”

“My god, you are fuckin’ hopeless.” Joel uttered with an unenthusiastic sigh.

You were counting out your tips for the evening at the front register when Joel Miller sauntered up. His demeanor was casual, yet by the way his hands were shoved deep in his pockets, you could tell he was nervous..but perhaps even embarrassed?

“Hey darlin,’ jus’ wanted to personally apologize for my brothers behavior earlier. He really is a fuckin’ hillbilly sometimes, and I hope he didn’t uh—make you feel too uncomfortable. Anyway, jus’ need to pay the bill and then I’ll get out of your hair.” He was already pulling his wallet out of his back pocket when you threw him for a loop.

“I’m free on the weekends after seven.”

He was thumbing through his bills as he pulled out a $20 and placed it along the counter. He slowly looked up at you, cocking a brow at your sudden boldness that came out of left field. “..I’m sorry?”

“You want to take me to prom, right? Well, don’t you think we should go on a proper date and get to know one another before I agree to be your prom date?” You grabbed the $20 from the counter and placed it in the register as you counted out his change.

“I’m sorry, I’m so fuckin’ confused right now. You want to get to know me? Look, I don’t even want to go to prom. It’s just a silly dance that I really have no interest in, and my brother is really the one who put me up to—”

“A simple no would have sufficed y’know. Regardless, what’s wrong with me wanting to get to know you? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I don’t have a lot going for me right now. What’s the harm of one date? Who knows, maybe you’ll actually have a good time.” You responded with a shrug.

“Keep the change, it’s for your tip. I wouldn’t exactly say that you don’t have a lot going for you. For starters, you're the only waitress here that knows how to skate..doesn’t that count for something? I suppose there wouldn’t be any harm of goin’ on one date. What’ll it be then? Dinner and a movie?” He was leaning his elbow against the side of the counter top as he reached into the jar of lollipops and pulled out a cherry flavored one. You couldn’t help but watch the way that his fingers effortlessly unwrapped the sweet and placed it between his lips.

He did that on purpose..right?

“Dinner and a movie sounds great. How about next Friday night? Pick me up around 7:30? I don’t believe I caught your name earlier either..should probably tell me what it is, right?” You gave him a little grin as you pushed the cash register drawer shut with a soft clink.

“Well, if I’m going to pick you up, I suppose I’ll be needin’ your phone number so that you can tell me your address? Or you could write it down..but what if I randomly want to call you up and tell you all about my shitty day? It’s gonna be hard for me to do that if I don’t have your number.” He gave you a little lopsided grin as he tilted his head to the side.

“Alright, well I’ll tell you what, I’ll give you my phone number in exchange for your name. That sounds like a pretty fair deal to me. What do you think?”

“Ain’t gonna be necessary for an exchange, darlin.’ I was just playin’ a little game with ya. Anyway, my name is Joel. The buffoon waitin’ in the parking lot is my brother Tommy. What kinda food are ya into?”

“I know you were, Joel. That’s why I played it right back.” You pulled out your little pen pad and wrote down your phone number and address. “Feel free to call me at random to tell me about your terrible, no good, rotten shitty day. I’d love to chat some more, but I have tables to wipe down. I’ll leave it up to you to pick out the restaurant.” You placed the piece of paper into his outstretched palm with a small grin playing on your lips.

“I like a girl that knows how to keep up with me. Nothin’ gets past you, huh?” He teased as he slipped the piece of paper into his back pocket. “Well, I’ll leave it to ya then. Wear somethin’ pretty, kay darlin?’” He shot you a playful wink before pushing himself off the edge of the countertop.

You desperately fought hard to not roll your eyes at his request to wear something ‘pretty’ “uh-huh. See ya around, Joel.” You brought your hand up to your forehead, giving him a little salute. Only when you were positive that he was back in his truck, and could no longer see you through the glass doors, you let out an excited squeal as you twirled in a tight circle on your skates.

Joel had an unmistakable pep in his step as he approached the drivers side door of his truck. Tommy was waiting for him, witn a cigarette perched between his lips, and an eyebrow raised in his brother’s direction. “What’s gotten you grinnin’ like a devil jus’ now?”

Joel reached into his back pocket and pulled out the folded piece of paper and handed it to his brother. “I’ve got myself a date Friday night. I didn’t even have to ask her, she jus’ pretty much beat me to it.”

“Uh-huh. I am sure that’s exactly how it went.” Tommy snickered as he handed the folded note back, sinking into the seat as he took a long drag from the cigarette. “So, where are you and the lucky gal gonna go?”

“I was thinkin’ keepin’ it simple..dinner and a movie. She said I can pick the restaurant, so I was probably gonna take her to the nicest place in Austin.” he shrugged his shoulders before starting the ignition. “Or do ya think that’s too bold?”

“Damn, look at you! Wantin’ to treat a lady right. ‘Atta boy.” He reached over and lightly punched Joel in the shoulder.

“Jus’ like momma taught me.”

Joel Miller arrived thirty minutes before you had expected him to show up for your date. You were just finishing up on your makeup when you heard the familiar sound of truck wheels crunching along gravel. Your parents were at the diner all evening, so that left you at home to dance around the house while you got ready. You had pretty much demolished your closet as you struggled to figure out what to wear. The butterflies were already fluttering rapidly in your stomach. Joel wanted you to wear something ‘pretty’ but you didn’t like the way that any of your dresses fit currently, so that was out of the question. You opted for suede olive green lace up shorts, a floral tie up top and your favorite pair of baby sky-blue go-go boots.

A warm breeze moved freely through the open windows in Joel’s truck as he was casually smoking a cigarette with his forearm resting along the outside of the window. He glanced upwards to where he imagined your bedroom was. A grin was playing on his lips as he caught a glimpse of you dancing around through the billowing curtains. He could faintly hear Tainted Love, by Soft Cell playing through your portable radio. You were using your hair brush as a pretend microphone. You were a burst of fun-loving energy, and Joel was already feeling infected by it. He didn’t want to come across as a cliche and drop the classic ‘you’re not like other girls’ line, but how could he not? Especially when you were dancing like no one was watching.

A few minutes later Joel was being torn from his trance when he heard the porch door swing shut, and the sound of your go-go boots clicking down the wooden steps. He nearly dropped his cigarette from between his lips when he got a first look at your outfit. He had half expected you to wear a dress, but the outfit you picked was fitting for your personality. You looked beautiful, and now he was beginning to feel his own butterflies flapping in his stomach. He wolf whistled as he reached over and unlocked the door for you.

“Well, ain’t you just a sight for sore eyes? Christ, you look so goddamn pretty, darlin.’” The way that he was looking at you was the way that all girls dreamed of being looked at. His eyes held a certain twinkle to them that had you feeling weak in the knees. Were all those failed crushes about to finally pay off? Well, only time could tell.

“How long have you been waiting out here for?” You responded with a shy smile as you climbed into the passenger seat.

“Long enough to see ya dancin’ to Tainted Love.” He chuckled.

You could feel the heat rising to your cheeks as you reached for the seatbelt, but he was already doing it for you. You got a proper whiff of his cologne, as he leaned over the center console. He smelled faintly of sawdust and cigarette smoke. His cologne was both sweet, and musky and god, did his hair look soft.

“You saw me dancing?”

“Mhm. You looked cute, and I swear I wasn’t bein’ a creep about it.” He slowly retracted himself after snapping your seatbelt in place.

“What can I say? Tainted Love just really gets me going.”

“Really? I totally couldn’t tell.” He teased as he slowly reversed down the driveway.

Your eyes zoned in on the collection of CD’s that were stored along the dashboard, and you wasted no time to grab the stack and flip through them. “Wow, you actually have good taste in music..i’m surprised.” You glanced over at him with a small grin. “Who’s your favorite?”

“I’m a big fan of Depeche Mode and Fleetwood Mac.” Responded as he rested one hand along the wheel, and the other on the center console. “You wanna pop one of those in?”

“Ahh, I love Stevie Nicks with my whole heart. Depeche Mode is really good too.” You gently opened one of the CD cases and placed the disk that you chose into the player. “So, are you gonna tell me where we’re going to dinner, or is it going to be a surprise?”

“Hmm..I could tell ya, but then that would ruin the surprise. I’m tryin’ to make this the best first date of your life darlin.’”

“Woowee. Best first date of my life? Y’know, those are some awfully big shoes to fill. I think it's gonna take more than dinner and a movie to accomplish that.”

“The evenin’ has only jus’ begun. I’ve got all night to show ya a good time. Spare me a lil’ faith, will ya?” He reached over and played with the volume toggle before he reached for another cigarette from the pack resting in the cupholder.

“Can I have one of those?” You gestured to the pack of cigarettes.

“A smoke? Sure ya can. You ever had one before?” He asked curiously as he pulled out a cigarette and placed it between his lips, using his freehand to light it.

“No, but I have always wanted to try one. I always think that the hollywood actresses and models in magazines always look so fucking cool smoking a cigarette. They're all just effortlessly cool.”

Joel couldn’t help but chuckle at your explanation for wanting to smoke. He didn’t want to go and crush your romantic dream of looking as cool as the magazine models. “Well, I don’t think you need to smoke in order to look as cool as the models in magazines. That being said..welcome to the darkside.” He pulled out another cigarette and placed it between your lips. Your eyes locked for a millisecond as he brought the lighter to the unlit end.

Your first inhale of the smoke from the deathstick was rough as the toxic chemicals invaded your lungs. “Fuck. That tastes like complete ass. Why did I expect it to taste sweet, like cherries or strawberries?”

“Never said it was gonna taste sweet, darlin.’ You’ll get used to it after the nicotine kicks in.” He softly reassured you as he reached over and gave your knee a gentle squeeze.

The restaurant Joel had picked was immediately out of both of your comfort zones. It was filled with the snobby upper class members of society. You and Joel stuck out like a sore thumb as you were seated at the table in the middle of all the rich people bullshit. The prices on the menu were absolutely ridiculous and even the water that was being poured looked expensive. Joel looked particularly uncomfortable as he felt that every pair of eyes in the damn establishment were looking at you and him, as if you were zoo animals trapped behind a glass case.

“Hey, Joel?” You asked as you set your menu down on top of your perfectly folded napkin.

“Yeah darlin?’”He was playing with the ends of the table cloth nervously.

“Can we stop playing pretend for just a second here?” Your question immediately caught him off-guard as he looked across the table at you with a quizzical expression on his face.

“What do you mean by that exactly?”

“What I mean by that is do you really wanna sit here making fake small talk about the weather to fit in with the upper snobs of society, or do you wanna go out and have some real fun?” You asked while leaning over the side of the table slightly. A woman to your left let out a disgusted sound when your elbows touched the edge of the table as if it was some terrible sin you had just committed.

An immediate look of relief washed over his face as he relaxed his uncomfortably straight posture. “Fuck. I was hopin’ you were gonna say somethin’ like that. Let’s ditch this joint.” He was already pushing his chair back in a haste.

You reached for his hand as you slung your purse over your shoulder. It wasn’t technically dine and dashing when you hadn’t even placed your food order yet. That didn’t make it any less thrilling to run through the kitchens and escape through the backdoors with your fingers still interlocked as you raced back to his truck.

“I’m so sorry for bringin’ you here darlin.’ I was thinkin’ of impressin’ you somehow, but there’s no way either of us were gonna last a minute longer in there. I hope this hasn’t completely ruined my task of makin’ this the best first date of your life. Do I get a second chance?”

“Joel, it’s alright. I’m just glad I finally said something. Did you hear that woman’s disgust when my elbows touched the table? I never wanna join that group of society. What a bunch of fucking losers.” You responded with a soft giggle. “The night is still young, remember? I have the perfect place in mind for us to go and have some real fun.”

“That woman is probably absolutely miserable in her stupid mansion filled with materialistic shit that she buys to make up for the fact that her husband is cheating on her with her sister. What did ya have in mind sweetheart?”

“Thank goodness she has Chanel and her fur coats to keep her warm at night. Have you ever gone to a roller-rink?”

“How did I know that was going to be your suggestion? Are you just lookin’ for an excuse to watch me eat shit? Cus’ that’s exactly what is goin’ to happen.” He chuckled.

“Me? Nah. I would never! That would just be so cruel of me. C’mon. I promise you’ll have a good time, and we can hold hands?”

“Like they do in the movies?” He looked over at you with a lopsided, boyish grin.

“Exactly how they do in the movies.”

“I’m all in darlin.’”

The roller-rink was packed and teeming with people of all ages but mostly teenagers. There was a large shimmering silver disco ball dangling from a wire in the center of the rink.

“I’m gonna look like an absolute fool in these things. How the hell do ya make it look so easy, huh?” Joel muttered as he laced up his skates with a huff.

“Hey, you’re not gonna look like a fool, okay? Trust me. This place is a judgment free zone. No one is going to make fun of you if you slip and fall on your ass.”

Joel looked over at you, squinting a little from the bright flashing light from all the little mirror tiles reflecting on the disco ball. “Okay, but if I fall, i’m takin’ you down with me. Deal?”

“Deal.” You hopped up from the bench with a grin as you offered him your hand to which he gratefully took as you helped him up.

You could feel just how sweaty the palm of Joel’s hand was as his fingers interlocked through yours. He had his other hand outstretched to the side to help with his balance. “So do I like..try and walk in these things or is more like a glidin’ motion?”

“You won’t get very far if you try to walk in them. It’s more of a gliding side to side motion to start, and if you feel like you’re about to fall, you can use the toe stop at the front of the skates. It almost acts as an emergency break.”

“You’re so fuckin’ lucky I like you darlin.’” He squeezed your hand gently as you helped him onto the rink.

“You’ll get the hang of it in no time. Just let me guide you for the first few times around the rink, and then I’m sure you’ll be able to try it out on your own. Unless..you wanna skate with the little tykes in the middle?” You teased as you slowly started to glide across the smooth surface with ease.

“Absolutely not. I will not be skatin’ with the kids. What if someone from school sees me?”

“Who cares? Just have fun!” You gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. You thought Joel looked quite cute looking all grumpy, but you hoped that by the end of the night you’d be able to get at least one smile out of him.

As the night progressed, Joel gained a little bit of confidence the more he skated and at one point, he had gently released your hand so he could try it out on his own. He was getting a hang of the gliding motion just as you decided to one up him and skate backwards.

“Now I think you’re just tryin’ to one me up darlin.’” He grumbled as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Hey, none of that! You’re doing great, Joel. Keep it up. I’m just going to go and grab us some refreshments, okay?”

“Really..? Thank you. It’s actually not as hard as I thought it was gonna be. Y’know, I might actually be having a good time..jus’ don’t let that get to your pretty lil’ head too much, okay?”

“I told you it wasn’t going to be so bad. You’re a natural. I’ll be right back.” You brushed your hand gently across his bicep as you skated past him and exited off of one of the openings to the carpeted area. You ordered two cherry cokes and a basket of fries. While you were waiting off to the side, you didn’t notice the guy to your left checking you out until a shadow casted over the wall from his presence.

“You here alone?” The guy asked as he leaned his elbow up right next to your head. He reeked of cheap liquor and you immediately grimaced.

“I’m not interested.”

“Ouch. That quick to shut me down, huh?”

“Yep.”

“Ain’t interested cause you got a boyfriend or somethin’ sweetheart?”

“I really don’t think it matters. Please leave me alone.”

“You don’t have to be such a fuckin’ bitch about it. Thought you would be interested considering your dressed like a fuckin’ slut.” He spat.

“Excuse me?”

Just when the piece of shit excuse of a man was about to open up his mouth to spew some more shit in your face, Joel was suddenly skating off the rink and to your rescue. He had noticed the guy harassing you from the other end of the rink.

“Hey man, how about you leave her the fuck alone? She ain’t interested. Fuck off.”

“Who the hell are you? I don’t have to listen to what the fuck you gotta say. Why don’t you just mind your own business?”

“I’m the boyfriend.” Joel deadpanned. “So, I’m gonna give you exactly five seconds to step away from my girl, or I’m gonna break your fuckin’ jaw.”

“Hey man, I don’t want any trouble I was just—”

“Five..four..three..two—” Joel started to countdown.

“Okay, okay! I’m goin!’” The guy scampered off like a dog with its tail between its legs.

“You alright?..I’m sure you had that handled, but it didn’t look like that guy was going to fuck off.”

“I’m okay. It’s unfortunately not the first time I’ve dealt with guys like that. I appreciate you stepping in though..”

“Of course. I’m sorry that you’ve had to deal with guys like that before. I don’t understand why it’s a rare occurrence for men to respect women. It’s the bare minimum, y’know?”

“Yeah, I really can’t understand it either. Men act like they are so entitled sometimes. At least you’re not one of them. You’re a real gentleman.”

“It’s how my ma raised me to be. She’d have my head on a spit if I ever disrespected a woman.” He grabbed the two cherry cokes and basket of fries from the counter as you sat down along the bench, with the fries placed between the two of you.

“Are you have a good time at least? You skated all the way over here without eating shit. I’m impressed.” You teased as you popped a perfectly crisp fry into your mouth.

“I’m actually havin’ a blast. This was a great idea to come out here. I guess the adrenaline sorta jus’ kicked in at the last minute? I definitely want to show ya my new moves I learned. Maybe impress ya even more?” He chuckled as he took a sip from his bottle of coke.

“I’d love to see your new moves. You think they’re gonna make my heart swoon?”

“Absolutely positive that they will make your heart swoon darlin.’”

Joel’s ‘moves’ consisted of him attempting to spin, and skate backwards. He ended up falling on his ass and taking you right now with him. You both were in fits of laughter as you hit the floor in unison. He was muttering about his ass hurting while you were clutching your stomach from how hard you were laughing.

God, you had such a cute laugh.

Midnight was the closing time for the roller rink. You and Joel were the two stragglers that weren’t ready to leave just yet as you skated in the middle of the rink to Take On Me. Your eyes were twinkling brightly like the disco ball above as Joel playfully spun you around.

In the end, you were kicked out by the closing staff and you and Joel walked back to his truck with infectious smiles on your faces. His arm was around your shoulder where your hands were interlocked, and before you could unlock the passenger side door, Joel was stopping you as he gently pressed your back up against the side of the door.

“I really want to kiss you right now.” He softly admitted as his arms encased your head on either side. He was broader than you realized as he loomed over you.

“So then kiss me.” You whispered through the thick palpable tension that was growing between you rapidly.

“You want me to kiss you?” He breathed softly as he dipped his head down, lightly brushing his nose against yours.

“Please kiss me Joel.” You whispered eagerly as your lashes fluttered shut.

His lips were slightly chapped, but you immediately liked the way they felt on yours. He was testing the waters out to see how you would respond as one hand dropped down and encased around your waist, pulling you up gently so you were flush against his chest. It was the kind of kiss that stole your breath from your lungs, and spun your brain like a ferris wheel. He tasted faintly of cherry coke, and tobacco.

He deepened the kiss only when you gave him the silent signal which consisted of your breath hitching in your throat, and your fingers twisting through his soft coffee-colored tendrils of hair. His tongue swiped confidently across your lower lip as you yanked on the roots of his hair gently.

He let out a soft grunt that vibrated up his throat as he gave your hip a gentle squeeze.

“Hey! What are you kids still doin’ here! Go the hell home!” A security guard at the roller rink shouted as he shone his flashlight directly in your faces.

“Hey man! We were just leavin!’” Joel grumbled in annoyance as he reluctantly detached his lips from yours and popped open the passenger side door.

“I’m serious! Get the hell outta here before I call the cops!”

Joel wasn’t the least bit threatened at the mention of cops being called as he lifted you into the passenger seat with ease. He stole one more kiss before he gently shut the door and sauntered over to the drivers side.

He started the ignition and rolled the window down just enough for him to stick his hand out and flip his middle finger up to the security guard before he peeled out of the parking lot.

When he finally looked over at you, he saw that your fingertips were lightly pressing into your lips where he had just kissed you minutes ago. You appeared to be in a trance as he reached his freehand over and gently squeezed your thigh. “You alright over there darlin?’” He softly asked.

“Yeah, I’m good. Just..happy.” You admitted as you looked over at him with a small grin.

“Ohh. Is that why you have that dopey look on your face?” He chuckled.

“Yeah, and because that was my first kiss. Could..you tell that it was?” You were playing with your hands in your lap now.

“Wait, I was your first kiss?..You’re serious about that?”

“Yeah, I mean..I’ve been kissed on the cheek by a couple guys but none of them ever properly kissed me. I guess maybe I should have told you that earlier?”

Joel couldn’t help but frown when he sensed the hesitation in your voice. It affected him so much that he was pulling over into the nearest gas station and turning his body completely so he was facing you. “Hey, it’s no biggie that you didn’t tell me earlier, sweets. I’m honored that I was your first kiss. I guess I'm just surprised that I am your first? I mean, you’re fuckin’ beautiful. You’re witty and smart. You’re like a breath of fresh air man. Sounds like these other guys are fuckin’ fools.”

“You think..I'm beautiful?” You finally looked up at him. “I guess I was afraid to tell you because I thought you’d..think it was weird or a turn off that i’m basically a prude?”

“Yeah, you’re literally a gem. You don’t see it? Look, I won’t lie to you and say that I haven’t been around the block a few times, because I have. I’ve had girlfriends here and there and casual hook ups just like the next guy, but as cliche as it's going to sound, you’re different. Now of course there’s nothing wrong with girls just wantin’ to flirt with me and fuck at some house party, I respect them just as much as I respect you. Don’t beat yourself down because you’ve never been kissed, or had sex. Real men aren’t gonna give a shit about that stuff because at the end of the day, that’s your personal choice. Hell, if you told me you slept with twenty guys it wouldn’t make me any less attracted to you than I am now. You’re not prude, and anyone that has ever made you feel that way is a piece of fuckin’ miserable garbage that is probably missin’ some substantial happiness in their lives.” Joel’s statement was one that was rooted in passion. He knew that he wasn’t the perfect guy and he made loads of mistakes, but he always made a point to respect the women in his life.

Your lips parted in pure surprise at Joel’s words, and even more-so when his hand that once was resting along your thigh, was now gently cupping your face with his thumb stroking your cheekbone. He was looking at you like you were the only girl in his world (you were). Ridden with overwhelming emotion, you found yourself wrapping your arms around his neck and hugging him tightly. “Thank you for respecting me, Joel. I know it’s silly for me to worry about these things but it’s just so fucking hard being a girl. Let alone a teenage girl. Sometimes I just feel like I'm behind everyone else, y’know? I see so many girls at school with boyfriends and dates to prom..and sometimes it makes me feel like there’s something wrong with me.”

“I can only imagine how fuckin’ it is to be a woman. Y’all deal with so much crap that men ain’t have to ever worry about. I know as a white straight male, I have it easy in the world and you don’t. I’ll never understand why the fuck society views women on such a low scale compared to men. Hell, maybe in our-lifetime we’ll see that change? One can only hope that by the time we’re our parents age, maybe the world will become a better place. Anyway, you shouldn’t feel like anythin’ is wrong with you darlin.’” You’re not behind the rest of us, and you’re completely normal. I’m tellin’ you this not because i’m tryin’ to get you to fall for me or anythin’ but because it sounds like you’ve been rough on yourself for years, and you deserve to hear the truth and some reassurance.”

“I don’t think you’d have to do much for me to fall for you, Joel. Not when I have been this entire evening.”

He took in a harsh inhale at your words. Was this what it felt like to fall in love with someone? Was it even possible to fall in love in one night?

“Well, if we’re goin’ and spillin’ secrets like that..i’m fallin’ for you too darlin.’”

“You’re right about me being hard on myself Joel. I’ve gotten so sick of my negative mindset and feeling this way that I decided I needed to do something about it. I’m really happy that I did.”

“You gotta stop that shit, okay? I know it’s hard, but you got your whole life ahead of ya. Just focus on havin’ fun. Fuck all that other noise.” He was leaning in close now with his hand still gently holding your face.

“You’re right. Fuck all that other noise.” You couldn’t help but laugh at the wonderful situation you had found yourself presently in. Just a week ago you were feeling like you’d never experience romance in your last month of highschool. Well, you were wrong because here was a guy, sitting next to a girl, wanting to kiss her.

“Before we finish what we started back at the roller-rink. I got one question to ask ya.”

“Shoot.” You whispered as you threaded your fingers through his hair as his nose gently brushed across your cheekbone.

“Will you go to prom with me darlin?’”

You responded to his question with a kiss as you climbed over the center dashboard right into his lap.

“I take that as an enthusiastic yes.” He mumbled into your lips with a warm chuckle as his arms encircled around your waist.

“Yes, I'll go to prom with you Joel.” You kissed him deeper as he pulled you in close.

It was the night of prom, and already you felt like you were living in a fairytale. Your dad had just come home from the dry-cleaners with your dress just as your mom was finishing up your hair and makeup.

“When is your lucky fellow gonna come and pick you up hun?” Your dad asked as he handed you your dress that was protected by a sheet of plastic.

“He said he’ll be here around six. You’re going to be nice..right?”

“Honey, of course I will. I’m not gonna bite the guy's head off.” Your dad responded with a chuckle. “You look beautiful sweetheart.”

You gave your dad a quick kiss on the cheek and a hug. “Just checking to make sure. He’s a nice guy. I’m sure you’ll love him. Thank you for picking up my dress, dad. I love you.”

“I’m sure I will love him, and I love you too kiddo.”

Joel pulled up into your driveway a little earlier than he said he would. Truthfully, he was a little nervous to meet your parents, but especially your father. His mom sent him over with a bottle of wine and he had stopped at the market to pick up some fresh flowers. He used what was left of his last paycheck from his dad’s carpenter company to purchase a fine tailored suit. The only hint you had given him about the dress you were wearing was that it was silver. So, he purchased a silver bowtie so that he would be matching you.

He swallowed his bubbling nerves as he knocked on the front door. Your dad greeted him with a polite smile as he opened the door. “You must be Joel. It’s so nice to finally meet you. Come on in, son. I promise I won't bite.” Your dad reassured him with a wink that immediately relaxed his muscles from having a spasm.

“It’s good to finally meet you as well, sir.”

Your father and Joel were deep in a conversation at the foot of the stairs when you had finally made an appearance. Joel found himself stuck in a trance, and perplexed by your stunning beauty as you gracefully descended down the stairs.

Your dress was made of silver shimmering fabric. The tool wasn’t poofy like the other dresses you had seen. It looked as if it was made for you. The top of the dress dipped down into a delicate sweetheart neckline, and his eyes zoned in on the silver pendant that laid against the middle of your breastbone. It was heart shaped and twinkled under the light. Your heels were silver, and just high enough to give you a couple inches. What really sent Joel’s heart racing was the bright smile you gave him when your eyes locked at the bottom of the stairway.

“Wow.” He uttered in disbelief. “You look absolutely beautiful darlin.’”

Your smile only began to intensify from his words as you gave him a little twirl before hugging him so tight, he thought his heart would burst. “You’re not looking too bad yourself, handsome.”

He could feel the blushing rising to his cheeks as you called him handsome, and he turned beet red when you pressed a soft kiss to his cheekbone.

Before either of you could leave, your mother insisted on taking a few photos while your dad told Joel to have you home no later than midnight.

As soon as you were safely in Joel’s truck, you wasted no time leaning over the center console and kissing him deeply. He responded to your kiss immediately as his hands gently found purchase around your waist. “I missed y’too.” He chuckled against your lips.

“I’ve been wanting to kiss you since you walked in that door.”

“Ditto.” He didn’t hesitate to respond.

“Ready to do prom with me, Joel?” You slowly pulled away and used your thumb to gently wipe away the lipstick residue that stained his lips.

“Ready as i’ll ever be darlin.’”

The theme for prom was “A Night To Remember” and boy, was that an understatement. Joel wasn’t much of a dancer, but he would be damned if he didn’t make his girl happy and dance the night away with her, even if his feet ended up aching by the 20th song. His favorite part of prom was the stupid little photobooth. He had so much fun making silly faces and kissing you like a man in love while the little camera in the booth flashed brightly. By the fifth slow song of the night, you were ready to get the hell out of there.

He was in mid conversation with Tommy when you had gently plopped yourself down into his lap and innocently whispered into his ear, “Wanna get out of here, cowboy?” As his arm wrapped around your lower back for support.

Joel’s eyes widened slightly at your suggestion, and he was silently grateful that he remembered to tuck a couple of condoms in his wallet. “Yeah, baby. Where do you wanna go?”

“Anywhere.” You pressed a soft kiss just below his ear before you slid off his lap.

Joel wasted no time to grab his suit jacket and gently drape it over your shoulders as he snatched up his keys and gave Tommy a little salute.

“Have fun kids! Don’t do anythin’ I wouldn’t do!” Tommy yelled as you and Joel were making a b-line for the nearest exit with his hand gently resting along your lower back.

As soon as you were outside, Joel wasted no time to scoop you up into his arms bridal style as he carried you back to his truck. Your arms looped around his neck. You could faintly smell moisture in the air as a storm was slowly beginning to roll in.

Joel used his freehand to open the passenger side door and gently set you down on the seat, making sure that your dress was tucked in before he closed the door. You were on one another like a moth to flame as soon as he was in the driver's seat.

“Where d’ya wanna go darlin?’” Joel mumbled against your lips.

“I want to go to the nearest park, and dance under the moonlight with you.”

“a lil’ bit of moonlight dancin’ with my baby? I’m all in honeypie.” He was holding your face in his hands so delicately as you kissed. “We can even celebrate with a lil’ splash of champagne after? I was savin’ it just for this special night.”

“Moonlight dancing AND champagne? Joel Miller, you sure know how to spoil a gal rotten.” You giggled softly as your hands slipped down over the patchy spots in his facial hair that were just beginning to grow in.

“Only the best for my baby.” He hummed thoughtfully as you gently ran the pads of your fingertips across his jaw. He pulled away from the kiss slowly and dragged the tip of his nose against yours in a kiss. “Don’t wanna mess up your hair and makeup just yet, darlin.’ We got all damn night for those shenanigans..although, your old man did say to have you home by midnight.”

“He really meant one in the morning.” You pressed one final kiss to his lips before you buckled yourself up.

“Mmm. Did he now? Are you absolutely positive about that darlin?’”

“Deadly.”

“Well, if ya say so.” He looked over at you with his usual boyish grin as he started the ignition.

Joel drove to the nearest park that was situated right in the middle of a little pond. There were only a couple people taking an evening stroll when you and Joel excitedly hopped out of his truck, finding one another’s hands as they interlocked like two puzzle pieces.

Your combined giggles painted the night air in the pure joy of young love as your heels echoed along the pavement. The moon was full, and bright in the stardusted sky as Joel pulled you into his arms and spun you around playfully.

There was no music to be heard, but you created your own with the clicking noises from your heels and your heartbeats entwined. Even when the wind picked up, and blew the skirt of your dress around your ankles, and the thunder rumbled its baritone tune, you continued to dance. The heavens opened up as rain droplets danced around you, and the sky lit up in brilliant flashes of white hot lighting.

“Baby! We should uh—probably get back to the truck now, don’tcha think?” Joel had to shout over the pouring rain that had already begun to soak through your dress and turned it a darker silver color.

“Not yet! Just dance with me a little more! The rain can’t hurt us baby, c’mon!” You grabbed both his hands gently as you spun each other around in a circle along the wet pavement. All it took was one threatening crack of thunder above for both of you to scamper back to his truck.

You sat side by side in the backseat, laughing about nothing in particular as the rain pounded into the roof of the truck and windows. Your giggles died down when he slowly looked over at you and gently grabbed your hand in his own. “Hey, even though we totally almost got obliterated by some lighting out there, I had so much fun. However, this storm seems pretty bad..won’t be able to drive you home until it passes through..any ideas on how we can make good use of our time?” He wiggled his eyebrows at you suggestively.

“Hmm..that’s a really interesting question for you to ask, baby. How do we make good use of our time?” You asked in a suggestive tone as you kicked your heels off to the floor of the truck and pulled yourself into his lap. “I think that all depends on what we both want to do..”

Joel felt his smirk tugging on his lips as you straddled his hips. His hair was soaked and stuck to his face until you had gently ran your fingers through the wet strands and pushed them off his forehead. “Well, what I wanna do requires me ruining this pretty dress, baby. I don’t wanna ruin it. You look so goddamn gorgeous in it.”

“Joel, it’s already pretty much ruined from the rain..”

“We’ll only do what you wanna do. Okay?” He reassured you.

You nodded, swallowing the lump growing in your throat as you looked deeply into one another’s eyes. The tension was slowly beginning to build as your forehead gently rested along his. “Joel?..” you asked softly.

“Yes darlin?’”

“I want you to make love to me. Just like how they do in the movies.”

He took a sharp inhale of breath as his lashes fluttered shut momentarily before he reopened them. “You sure that’s what you want baby? There’s no rush, I promise.”

“Joel, please. I want you to take care of me. I don’t care if it’s not in a bed. I don’t care that it’s in the backseat of your truck. I want you fuck me like it’s our last night.”

He was kissing you then as his hands came up to hold your face once more. “I’ll take care of you, I promise baby. We’ll go as slow as you want. I—I brought condoms..not because I was expecting this to happen tonight, but I just wanted to bring them to be safe.” He mumbled softly against your lips.

“Baby, I know you’ll take care of me. I trust you.” You did. You really did trust him with your entire heart. As if it was made only for him.

“Lay on your back for me honey..nice and easy now..” he kissed you slowly as he gently eased you on your back. He detached his lips from yours for only a moment as he reached for his suit jacket and tucked it under your head so you would be more comfortable. His lips found yours once more as his hand slowly trailed up your calf to your knee. He didn’t want to rush this experience for you. He wanted every moment of it to be enjoyable, because he cared about you that much.

His hand had just found its way up to your middle thigh when you had let out a wanton whimper. You’d never been touched like this before by a man. It set a fire deep within your belly when Joel began to pepper kisses down your jaw. He kissed down the column of your neck, and that valley between your breasts. You opened for him like a blooming flower.

Gooseflesh rose upon your skin as his freehand slipped under your lower back in search for the zipper of your dress. You could feel his lips curving into a grin against your skin as he slowly tugged it down. He shimmied your dress down over your breasts and hips and gingerly laid it across the center console. “You’re so beautiful, darlin. I could stare at your beautiful body for hours..but why do that when I can just show you how beautiful I think you are?..” he whispered against the spot where your collarbone met the base of your throat.

“Joel..” you whispered.

“Shh. I know, baby, I know. I jus’ wanna take my time with ya. Savor every inch of your skin on my tongue.” He lowly hummed as his head dipped back down. When his lips enveloped your pebbled soft flesh, your back arched upwards as a sweet moan slipped past your parted lips.

He rolled his teeth across the bud, flicking his tongue across it expertly, just as his hand slowly dipped under your cotton panties. His fingers stroked you gently, moving in tight circles as your thighs fell open. You had touched yourself under the bedsheets many times before, but it never felt as good as this.

His name dripped from your lips as his fingers played you like a violin. He was carefully attentive to your body language and the way you reacted to his touch. He learned that you were ticklish around your hips, and you liked it when he lightly nipped at the soft flesh of your inner thigh.

He learned that you especially liked the way his tongue worked your cunt into ruin, and his patchy beard scratched at your sensitive skin. He learned that you loved to kiss him, and hold his face as close to your own as possible. He learned that you enjoyed slow, deep thrusts where you could feel him in his entirety. Every stretch and pull as your body hugged itself around his cock like a warm blanket. He learned that kissing just below your ear would cause you to giggle, kissing your neck made you moan.

He learned that your body may as well have been created just for him, and his for you. He never felt so emotionally connected to someone in his life, and now here he was buried so deep inside of your warmth, he swore he could see stars behind his eyelids as he kissed and nipped your chin gently.

He had never made love to any woman he had ever been with. He never moved so slowly, so thoughtfully with the only goal in mind to bring you to that high that felt like no other. So when you came undone around him, he praised you, he kissed you and held you as tears fell down your cheeks. He knew they weren’t unhappy tears. They were tears of overwhelming emotion, and he kissed them all away before he gathered you up in his arms.

It was far past midnight by the time the storm had stopped, and you and Joel found yourselves in the bed of his truck, sharing the bottle of champagne while you were wrapped up in a blanket together. You talked of the future, your relationship and what it meant. You giggled like school girls when he brought up how sweet you tasted, and how he wouldn’t mind having you as a meal everyday.

You talked about the stars and the moon and if the sun ever felt lonely that she never gets to see the night sky like you and him do. You talked about your dreams, your desires and wishes after highschool. He wanted to say he loved you, he really did; he just didn’t know how to articulate it.

You had drunk more than enough champagne, and the bubbly effects were beginning to take their toll on you as you struggled to stand to your feet. Joel was a second too late to catch you before you fell right over the side of the truck and hit the concrete below with a thud.

He screamed your name as it happened in slow motion before his eyes. Panic swirled deep in his gut as he hopped down from the bed and immediately rushed to your side. You were scraped up pretty bad and had a gash an inch long across your forehead that was oozing crimson blood. “Baby! Are you alright?” He was scooping you into his arms in a haste but you didn’t even seem to notice that you were injured.

“Babyyy why do you look so sad? Why wouldn’t I be okay?” You giggled drunkenly.

“Fuck. I knew I should have cut you off from the champs sooner. Baby, you’re bleedin’ all fuckin’ over the place. I’m gonna take you to a hospital, okay? I’m so sorry I didn’t catch ya.” He lifted you up bridal style

“Bleeding? Baby, what are you talking about? I’m not bleeding!” Your giggles continued as you reached up and touched the gash on your forehead. You saw the blood droplets on your fingers, but were unfazed. “Oops! I am bleeding. How did that happen?”

He was already placing you into the passenger seat and buckling you up quickly. He didn’t speak until he was in the driver's seat and peeling out of the parking lot to the nearest hospital. “Baby, you had a lot of champange and fell out of my truck. Your daddy is gonna fuckin’ kill me sweetheart.”

“Champagne must be numbing all the pain, because I don’t feel a thing! Joel, my daddy is going to have to go through me first if he wants to kill you. I’ll protect you baby. He won’t touch you.” You were reaching into his glove box for his pack of smokes and lighter.

“Baby, you don’t feel a thing at all? Fuck. Well, I guess that’s a good thing cus’ you nearly fuckin’ broke your ass. Don’t worry, m’gonna get you to the hospital, and they’re gonna fix ya right up. You’ll be good as new.” He spoke as calmly as he possibly could. Inside he was absolutely freaking the fuck out.

You took a long drag from the cigarette as you made yourself comfortable in the passenger seat. You reached for his freehand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

It was in those exact moments that he realized just how deeply he had fallen in love with you.

Your daddy did in fact want to kill Joel when he drove you home from the hospital. He profusely apologized to your father, while your mother ushered you upstairs. You kept looking over your shoulder to find his face, but your dad was blocking the doorway.

The last time you saw Joel Miller was graduation day. It was outside in the school parking lot. He was leaning against the side of his truck, with his graduation cap in hand. His shoulders were slumped forward, and from the angle you were at you couldn’t tell if he was crying. You were about to call out his name, but he was already getting back into his truck.

Eighteen years had suddenly passed. You went off to college on the other side of the country. You met loads of boys that kissed you, and fucked you, and loved you, but none of them were Joel. You kept a little piece of him in your heart all those years, wishing you could go back to that magical night. The faint scar along your forehead was a constant reminder of those last moments you shared together. Now you were older, and feeling lost in life, and returning home seemed like your best option.

Your parents were more than happy to have you home again, and it felt like nothing had changed. The diner was the same way you had left it, and your old skates were still in the back cubby. Nostalgia washed over you when your eyes locked on the corner booth where you and Joel had first met. It was so long ago, but it had felt like just yesterday he was asking you out on your very first date.

You closed the diner up half past 10 when you could hear the familiar sound of crunching gravel under truck tires. A car door slammed shut as you were locking up the front door.

“Hey stranger.” The familiar Texas drawl nearly had your knees buckling inwards.

“Joel?..” you asked in disbelief as you slowly turned around to face him.

“Yeah, it’s—it’s me darlin.’” He shoved his hands deep into his pockets as he looked over at you.

“What—what are you doing here? I never thought I’d see your face again.”

“Truthfully? I..don’t know. I just heard from Tommy that you were in town again, and I jus’ figured there was no harm in comin’ to see you. I don’t know why it’s taken me so long to just grow a pair. I wasn’t sure how you would react to seein’ my face again after all these years.”

You took a few cautious steps forward as you twirled your keys between your fingers. “Do you want to come inside?..we can talk and I’ve got some leftovers in the fridge—”

“Please.” He cut you off suddenly. “I would love to come inside and talk to you.”

“Two cherry cokes and a basket of fries?”

“Jus’ like our first date.” He murmured softly as he followed you into the diner he knew so well.

“You remembered?..”

“How could I forget? It was the most fun I ever had on a date darlin.’” He cleared his throat nervously as you walked over to the booth in the corner.

His presence was suddenly so close, you felt like you couldn’t breathe as he slid into the booth. He had grown much broader over the years. His arms had filled in and his beard was less patchy. His eyes still held that same familiar warmth to them like they did the first time you met. He clasped his hands together along the table as you disappeared into the back area of the kitchen, and returned minutes later with two cherry cokes and a basket of fresh fries. You sat across from him, and the beverages and fries were left untouched as you sat in silence for what felt like hours.

“So, how have you been?” Joel started the conversation as he slowly reached for a fry.

“I’ve been better. How about you?”

“Not that great if I’m bein’ honest with you.” He popped the fry into his mouth, chewing slowly.

“What’s..going on?”

Joel let out a heavy sigh as he sank back against the worn booth seat. “For starters, I have a 12 year old daughter that I’m raisin’ on my own. Tommy has been helpin’ out thank god. It jus’ ain’t easy, bein’ a single father.”

Your lips parted in shock. It was easy to forget just how much time had passed. Of course Joel had been married, and had a child now. Of course he moved on. You couldn’t blame him, especially when you had gone and done the same.

“You..have a daughter? What’s her name?..”

“I do, yeah. Her mom left us when she was just a few months old. Really fuckin’ messed me up. Anway, her name is Sarah. She’s as cute as a button, really she is. I’m just strugglin’ to make ends meet with my job. I do everything for that little girl, and sometimes I feel like that’s not enough.”

“I bet she is adorable, Joel. Do you have a picture of her? I’m sorry that your wife left you to raise her. I’m glad that you have Tommy to help out at least.”

“Yeah, I’ve got a photo of her right here in my wallet. S’okay. You don’t have to be sorry. Sometimes those things just don’t work out. I’ve moved past it the best that I can.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet and opened it, revealing an adorable little girl with a head of thick black curls, and eyes just like her daddy.

“Oh, Joel. She’s absolutely beautiful.” You were holding in tears you didn’t realize were building as you gently stroked your thumb across the photograph. “She’s got your eyes.”

“She is beautiful. She’s one of the best things that has ever happened to me. I’m so grateful that she’s my little girl. Enough about me, what about you? What’s goin’ on in your life darlin?’ Are..you married?” He was almost too nervous to ask you. He just had to know, even if the answer would hurt him forever.

“I’m miserable if I’m being honest with you now. I’m not married, no. I actually just broke up with my long term boyfriend and moved back home. I quit my 9-5, and just realized that I was pretending to be happy for so long.”

“Why did you break up with him?..”

“Because he wasn’t you Joel.” Your confession fell heavy upon his heart as his face slowly fell into a deep set frown. “He was good to me. He loved me, and wanted to marry me, but he wasn’t you. He’ll never be you.”

“Darlin?’”

“Joel?”

“Do you remember that day you fell outta my truck?” He asked softly.

“I sure do, you came jumping out after me.”

“Well, you fell on the concrete, nearly broke your ass and you were bleeding all over the place. I rushed you out to the hospital, you remember that?” He could feel his own tears begin to well up along his waterline as his voice nearly cracked.

“Yes, I do.” You were reaching for his hand across the table, gently placing yours on top of his.

“Well, there’s something I never told you about that night…” he trailed off.

“What didn’t you tell me?”

“While you were sitting in the passenger seat smoking a cigarette you thought was gonna be your last, I was falling deep deeply in love with you, and I never told you ‘til just now.” His tears had freely begun to fall in sync with your own. You both were reaching for each other's faces to gently wipe the tear droplets away.

“All these years?…”

“Yes, all these years I have wanted to tell you. That night, after we made love, I was going to say it. It was on the fuckin’ tip of my tongue and I froze. I chickened out, and lost my chance. I haven’t stopped thinkin’ about you, or that night for eighteen years. You always have had a piece of my heart, and I’ve never been able to fully let you go, and I don’t think I ever will.” He admitted.

“I wanted to tell you that night as well. I lost my chance when I got too drunk to stand and toppled over the side of your truck. I knew it when we danced in the rain, and when you took care of me the way that all women want to be taken care of. I’ve tried to move on, and love someone else, but I’m incapable. I didn’t just come home because I was miserable in my present life. I came home because I was hoping I’d run into you.” You gently stroked your thumb across his cheekbone.

“Joel, do you believe in the idea of the right person, but at the wrong time?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Do you believe that then can turn into the right person, at the right time?”

“Yes, darlin’ I absolutely believe that to be true. Now, I have one very important question to ask you.”

“What is it that you have to ask me?”

A knowing smile graced his aging features as he leaned in close, close enough that you could see the warmth held in his irises.

“Will you go to prom with me darlin?’”

Fin

Tagging people I think will enjoy: @chaotic-mystery @cavillscurls @morning-star-joy @dinsdjrn @cupofjoel @thetriumphantpanda @darkroastjoel @tessa-quayle @saradika @kirsteng42 @amanitacowboy @sinsofsummers @lovers-liability

Banners made by the lovely @saradika

303 notes · View notes

h0unds-of-h3ll · 2 years

Text

Lover’s exchange

After submitting your final. Jonathan’s more than intrigued as to where the inspiration comes from.

Jonathan Levy x reader smut.

Word count: 8k

Viewers beware you’re in for a scare with the: fluff, smut, rough smut, VERY EXPLICIT, age gap, fingering, blow jobs, eating out, unprotected sex, gagging, anal play, ass eating, overstimulation, coercion, consenting adults, power control, breeding kink, recorded masturbation, explicit language & themes, dark themes, drinking, smoking, rough smut, hair pulling, scratching, Jonathan is not as innocent as he seems, teasing, porn? Porn, teacher x student, somnophilia, implied face sitting, sensory deprivation kinda.

A/n: I literally took the idea of him being a professor and fucking ran full throttle with it. Can be an au! I guess. Head empty just him. Just a disclaimer that I’m not in college and nor have any idea what consists there. I apologize for any misconstrued ideologies! Most is written in the 3rd pov.

“A passionate encounter, one that has never been replicated since. That is what I want you to write about.”

He rolls the sleeves of his cardigan up to his elbows. The few students scattered throughout the small auditorium. He knows they’re not listening, but he continues nonetheless.

“It can be with a spouse, a stranger, anything really. I’m giving you the freedom to express a feeling only you have felt so incomparable to anyone else.”

The electronic bell he’s grown to despise rattles. His students billow out into the side door, to their next seminar. He plops into the wheely chair with a long elongated sigh. He hopes it came across well, the prompt of their final. A feeling twists in his gut, not even half listening to him. He wants to help them prosper. He’s a lenient professor, one of the most laid back on the board. But there’s only so much he can brush past. Late work that’s a month overdue, students pleading for him to turn an F into a B- is exhausting. He takes his glasses off, hanging his head into his palms. He’s trying desperately to wipe away the misery that's clinging to his features. The soft sounds of shoes patting the ground. The loud chit-chat of the pupils communicating through the corridor. He fails to hear you sneak up on him.

“Professor?”

His head whips upwards to the chirp of your elegant voice. Your hands tied around your school bag. A gentle smile creasing your cheeks. Hair flowing like a drape of a veil. Easy going on his aging eyes. His brain inputs into hyper drive, admiring you. You’re the only student who cares about their work. Who asked questions, who listened intently to the subject he taught. He’s taken a kindness to you that he has given no one else. Rounding up those fives into one hundred.

Giving you that plus you didn’t need, but makes your transcript look more polished. You never spoke to him about subjects outside of education. But you always came to him to broaden your knowledge to keep your work proficient. You’re smart and charming. Pulchritudinous even. (A word that he came across in your work that means beautiful.) He feels immense guilt. Pushing his blurred gaze to the side of his desk. More suitable for the atmosphere. He shouldn’t think of you in such a way. He can’t help it now matter how hard he tries.

“Yes? What is it?”

His voice is short and snappy. Cutting the rope that he’s tethered to. He punches himself for how your smile drops to a vacant expression.

“I was wondering how uhm,”

You pause. Brows knitted on your smooth forehead. You look for the words that aren’t immature in the phrasing.

“How much vulgar use you would allow.”

There's that sheepish smile again. He chokes on his saliva, blind eyes widening. The long curve of his nose is where he pushes his glasses back. He sees your unmasked beauty, and he’s sputtering. An unknown speech impediment develops as he racks his dumbfound skull for an answer. He loses the suaveness of a preceptor and the eager man he truly is comes to play.

“I-, as long as it’s a salient contribution to the plot. As much as you’re comfortable with, I suppose.”

He applauds himself for coming off the slightest bit as composed. What do you mean by vulgar? Maybe you wanted to include paraphernalia or explicit language. But what if- you wouldn't, you are too put together to even indulge. But what if? You nod swiftly. Brightness swims in your eyes.

“Thank you, pedagogue.”

Your idyllic body pivots walking through the big twin doors. He lets out a heavy heave exit his lungs, one that he didn’t realize he was holding. He leans down, pressing his febrile forehead onto his desk. He’s stupefied by the title. Pedagogue, really? He praised himself for being benevolent and you thought that he was austere? A new, fresh hoard of scholars enter his domain. He groans, wanting to bash his cranium into the wood. He doesn’t know how to feel. But the only thing he can think about while teaching his course is feeding you grapes in a lavish room in Israel.

~~~

A week and a half later, Jonathan is sprawled out on his couch. A wine glass in hand, shitty cable on demand playing some nonsense. A pair of grey joggers low on his hips, a dark earthy tone sweater on shoulders. All wrapped together with a thin white chain with the Star of David draped on his sternum. He doesn’t really know why he wears it anymore. He doesn’t feel like he treasures his faith, cast from the religion. He doesn’t hold the practice to his heart. Especially not after the occurrences with Mira. The exact reason he sits alone in this big empty house.

Longing for Daughter’s presence. A distant glow of his laptop on the coffee table in front of him, pleading for him to do something, anything. His heart torn from the absent wishes of wanting his life to be different. Filled with artificial happiness. Loneliness puts him in a corner with no escape. He’s grown accustomed to the feeling, throughout his failed marriage, he knows it all too well. Ridden by the pain of it, something unfamiliar takes its place. Something stronger than isolation. Desolation. He’s felt like this for so long that he’d forgotten that there are other emotions. Like jouissance, similar to having a penchant for something. To have it for you. He knows deep down that it’s wrong.

Fuck he knows, he does and it will kill him. Shouldn't think of his student in such a desirous manner. But he can’t stop. Ever since you walked yourself into his class, he hadn’t gotten you out of his head. Daydreams he's living in with you. Different past lives he could’ve had with you. Every waking moment you’ve plagued him. Every off hand hungry exchange with Mira, he imagines you. He can’t get away from you. A deep breath emits from him. He scratches his forehead, lost in the thought of you. His laptop pings with a buzz. It seems that the universe has answered his prayers. He straightens his posture, setting the glass on the table before pulling the computer on his lap.

He adjusts his glasses; the glow glares off the glass spheres. His house is pitch black other than the distant television and the radiance in front of his face. He sets it flat on his lap, rolling up the sleeves of his sweater. He uses the track pad and finds his notifications. You. You’ve sent him something, your email in his inbox. A pdf. Your semester final. You work his schedule like clockwork. It wasn’t due for another week and yet you’ve already finished. He’s already gotten a few messages from other disciples needing the date pushed back, but you’ve completed it. His heart soars, resembling something along the lines of being proud? No, appreciative. He remembers the words you spoke to him the day he gave the prompt. Vulgar.

How lovely you looked that day, but in his opinion you always looked like that. Somehow you looked even better that day. Chipper and gleaming like a morning dew. The cursor hovers over the link. He clicks, opening the document. The black words on a white sheet were gifted to him. Your introduction and citations at the top corner. The title in the middle. Lover’s exchange. He scrolls to the first paragraph, with a heavy heart and high hopes he begins.

Act I

It’s midnight when they meet. A dark sky with twinkling stars. A lamppost with a spotlight they run through. An older man and a younger woman trailing after him. It’s forbidden among the laws of society because of the taboo. The way they dance through the night to his house. The two disregard the dirty looks. They only existed with each other in their world. They lied to one another, saying that the energy shared is just an exchange. An exchange of passionate encounters.

The feel of his salt and peppered beard on her skin, the marks he gives her after the exchange. In the end, it’s what they both wanted- needed. His prolonged fingers tied around her wrist, tugging. She sees his house. White picket fence almost as much as her tuition. In a diverse neighborhood with economic growth. The older man modeled an image of what an established man should be. Bittersweet. Reminds her of a family of four with a dog. Stability isn’t what this was. Unbridled lust is all it was. They go against the formal casualties of dinner. They run up the stone onto his porch. He fumbles with his keys to unlock his door. He’s nervous, twitching with excitement. He inserts the key, then he’s tugging her again. Into his home. The smell of spring and hominy hits her.

He shrugs off his jacket, tossing it into the distant living room. Turning to throw keys into a bowel. He pivots, his glasses glimmer with the faint light of the dark night. Concealing his dark eyes from her. He smiles, big and toothy. Imperfect teeth rewarded her. He curls a finger under her chin. His other resting on her shoulder. He tilts his head to the side, slotting his lips into hers. Rhythmic and precise. Walking her up into a wall, hands slithering under the jacket and peeling it off. He moves his head back, the coat that dwarfs her in hand. Long feathered lashes fan across his crimson cheeks. He puffs. His hands leave to discard her jacket. Only for one of them to wrap around her wrist to pull. Long strides bound her up his stairs, to the landing. She’s amazed how he didn’t trip and fall face-first into one of the steps.

He’s running up them and she’s trying her hardest to keep up. He barely opens his door before he pushes her inside. There’s no time for delicacies. He’s pulling at a ravenous pace at her clothes, her the same. They scatter like leaves throughout his bedroom. It wasn’t the first time this has happened and sure to be the last. But the way he looks at her is like a groom looking at a bride. Dopey eyed and filled with emotion. His fingers run up her arms, the hair standing up as he goes. The skin is as soft as velvet. She reaches, fingers touching his temples before removing his specs. He hates himself for gazing at her breasts. Watching the flesh, crease and undulate. The color of her nipples easily begins to fight for his favorite. She leans up on her knees, the bed pulling inwards by his thigh. She kisses the space between his brows.

His heart picks up at a speed a horse would gallop, and he begins to question everything. Such a pure girl is with him to do unspeakable things. She’s his first after the split. So why is he starting to develop feelings if all of it is just raw fucking and emotionless? But what if it wasn’t, what if he wanted something a little dangerous? Something he can’t bring up at those shitty dinner parties Mira dragged him to. The conferences among the board asking his marital status, he can’t and he won’t. His dirty secret in the hands of a younger untouched girl. In all honesty how can he not get attached? He remembers reading something years ago. An article about how the chemicals match and sync with the counterparts.

How it’s simply science to get attached. He shakes his head, dark curls painted grey moving on his head. He rids himself of his thoughts. One night a month, he has to make it good. The moon shines through the big window in the middle of the room. He lays her down, peppering kisses on her neck. Finding the places he knows she likes. She was so easy to him, he knew her like the back of his hand. Yet, he always seems to find something that he never knew. There were never fights or grudges between the two. They fuck like they actually like each other. His large hands grope at her sides. Making her squirm in his grasp. His knees pinch at the bottom of her thighs. Her legs wrapped around his long waist. His semi hard erection laid in the crevice between her thigh and mound. Her hands tied in his curls. Twisting and pulling at the follicles. She didn’t have to tell him what felt good, he can tell by the pulls. His nose skims across her skin, tasting and lapping at the saltiness.

Worshipping each inch with the utmost delicacy. He kisses down her sternum. Purposely avoiding her peaks. Down her stomach and there. He parts her thighs, crawling down her body. Wedging his broad shoulders between her thighs. His beard burning caresses into the inside. His curls are a soft contrast. His plush lips press a kiss on the few scars he can find. His hands go to the sides of her hips, under her thighs. He wiggles on his chest to grow closer to her wet heat.

She’s glistening, poor thing. He flattens his tongue from where her entrance is to her clit. Over her slit, not entering her folds. Oh. So he’s going to be a tease tonight. She can’t complain from the whimpers he’s getting from her. The jut of her hips grinding on his face. The soft shake of her thighs on the sides of his face. His hands come back to her cunt. His thick thumbs, coming to either side of her lips. Pulling them apart. He’s enamored, watching her contract then dampen. His breath fans over the expanse and she’s shivering.

Her grip on his hair tightening. His tongue snakes out from behind his lips. His nose brushed along the hood of her clit. He pushes the tip of his tongue onto her bundle of nerves. Kitten licking the bud. It’s so meticulous and thought out for no error that she knows he's planned this for a while now. This encounter was planned to a t with no spontaneity. His tongue pulls back and she whines. But his mouth doesn’t move, he shakes his head to plunge his head into her. He sucks through his teeth, pulling her clit up. The sharp pain makes her yelp, her back arching off his mattress. His chin digging into the lower half of her cunt. The wiry hair of his beard tearing into her sensitive folds. The hair most definitely being soaked with her arousal.

Her stomach churns and hot pleasure pools into her lower back. Her knuckles turning white, she’s only half sure that she’s pulling clumps of curls from his scalp. It’s just so thick and full of hair that she doubts anyone will notice. She’s close, too close. Been waiting for this moment since the last time she had seen him. Those tight khakis and the fucking cardigan she knows that are hiding stretched muscles. Toes curling into his sheets. One of his hands leaves, shifting his body to accommodate. Two fingers enter her rigid hole. She’s moaning high in her throat. Jerking her hips up into his stupidly sculpted face. Trying to leave his face only results in him lapping more feverishly. He just moves with such elegance that she’s hurting. Just from his mouth.

She’s bruised from his teeth never leaving her clit alone. He curls those protracted fingers in her cunt and she’s seeing stars as he pumps them. Her legs are tightening around his head. The thickness, the stretch of it all has her crumbling. Spasming on the coarse hair of his face, he coaxes her through it. Even if his jaw is cramping she doesn’t know, he just continues to drink from her. Spreading her open to devour farther. His fingers leave only to be replaced with his mouth. His tongue intruding her hole. Plugging her up with the muscle. He stays there until it seems she has calmed and she’s not scalping him. He shifts to pull up on his knees. His hands leave soothing circles on her hips.

Her eyes are closed and she almost looks like she’s sleeping but her panting chest he knows she’s in the sky right now. Like an angel, his angel. He lifts her, flipping her on her stomach. He lowers on his stomach. Pushing her legs apart. His fully hardened cock pushed into the mattress. He spreads the globes of her ass. Listening to that keen gasp. His lips part and a string of drool falls on her puckered hole. When his saliva meets the ring, she clenches and he’s groaning. His face meets between her cheeks to lick at the flesh. His nose went into the divot. His beard scraped her. The smell of her heavenly.

The feeling of being suffocated by her has him thrusting into the plush mattress. She fists her hands into the pillow by her head. Enthralled by the foreign feeling of his tongue digging into the forbidden part of her. He moves his face down to lick at her slit to bring it up to the dry hole. His tongue moistions his lips. He huffs before delving in once more. One of his hands is coming to knead her cheek. His thumb slowly pushed into the hole carefully. Drool runs down her face. She’s too tired to even move. The intrusion has her thighs slicked. He feels his cock pulsing when he has her take the first knuckle. He doesn’t care if she cums again, he's just eating to devour. Eating from the purest of fruits. His sac tightens up. A couple of shallow thrusts and he’s done. The stickiness caught between the sheets and his paunchy stomach.

He moans, his mouth leaving her. During his onslaught he didn’t realize that his thumb was fully inside her. His palm pressed flushed to the curvature. He’s amazed at the sight. Saddened when he pulls the digit out of her. He lays on his back by her, on his side of his bed. Skin damp with sweat. Dark skin filled with precipitation. He knows that he just committed a crime. That if someone finds out he’d be in a penitentiary. That he couldn’t go back to whatever the fuck normal was in his life. He couldn’t go back into the comfortable life of not sleeping with his student. So he ponders the question as to why it feels so good if it was such an incriminating thing. He comes to the conclusion that being a saint only lasts so long. And he has to admit that this feeling of being a sinner provides so much more exuberance.

Interlude I

Jonathan has to take a step away. He can feel his lungs closing in. He’s wheezing, his face buzzing under his glasses as he grows light-headed. Fuck. Why is his mouth so dry? He pushes his laptop to the cushion beside him. Lifting with the crack of gas between his bones. He walks into his kitchen, standing tall to grab a clear glass. He returns to his fridge, pushing the lip into the fridge’s mouth. The dispenser spews cold water. His chest heaves as he can’t breathe. Not now, please, not now.

His head hurts, his temples tingling. His vision waved in and out. He placed the glass on the island. Hastily pulling open drawers. Panic brews in his stomach. A stone dropping his heart to the ground. Fuck, where is it?! He curses himself for never leaving it in the same spot. His ego was too inflated to believe he needed to know where it was. That he didn’t need it to live. His hands blindly pulled junk out, throwing it onto the tile. In the very back of the sinks cabinet he finds it. He pulls the inhaler between his lips. Pushing the top down for ten seconds, inhaling. Keeping it in for fifteen, then exhaling. His frame deflates with the small thing in hand.

He smiles with sharp pearls up at his ceiling. Trying to push the feeling of a hysteric laugh boiling up his throat. Down to his belly. How fucking absurd this was! He almost went into an asthma attack because of some erotica. Reading erotica that you wrote. His eyes fall to the open drawer that pushes into the bone in his hip. He cranes his neck, finding the pack of cigarettes. Now it makes sense. The inhaler and smokes shoved into the back so an eager eye couldn’t easily find them. Even himself. He trades the inhaler for the pack. It hits the back with a thud. He flips the tab open, only finding two white sticks and his lighter shoved into the side. Thank fucking god. Taking one of the cigarettes between his fingers, he slots it onto the top of his ear.

His curls are trying to push it free, so he pushes it down. Throwing the pack that he’d go back to later on the marble. He’s so warm. Almost burning with sweat. His fingers tie around the bottom of his sweater. Lifting it over his head and tugging off the sleeves. He hisses at the cold air hitting his bare skin. His chain hitting his chest. He tosses his sweater onto the island. He takes the cigarette back behind his ear to his parted lips. Grabbing the lighter, he cups the flame; the embers alighting. He shoves the lighter in his pocket. Inhaling for ten seconds, holding it for fifteen, exhaling. The taste and the scent makes him wonder why he’d ever try to stop. Mira and his kid, but now that they’re both gone.

Leaves him with no excuses. He doesn’t have to half step out the door because of the pungent smell. Doesn’t have to hide his habits. His stomach contracts with each breath. His mind slowly easing into standby. He’s thinking about emailing you back. Asking how you came up with this explicit idea. Did you experience it first hand? Did you want to? He smiles, he thinks of himself as more than a willing candidate. He wanted to say that he absolutely seethed the fluids that you explained so beautifully. But he couldn’t. The way you painted the actions wasn’t humanly, it was mystical.

He’s impaired with his way of thinking. He’ll never think of such acts as he used to. The cigarette burns the pads of his fingers. He takes one last breath in before flicking it into the garbage disposal. The flame dies instantly. He sighs out a gust of smoke. Grabbing the glass of now lukewarm water and sitting on his couch. Almost groaning as he spreads out. The tv plays some superhero movie that he’s never seen. One of the Wolverine ones. He watches the claws swipe through what only he can presume is a villain. Taking a swig of the water his chest erupts into shivers. He places it by the wine. Rubbing his palm on his sweats, he attempts to regain his consciousness. With a deep sigh he grabs his computer by his thigh and reads.

Act II

The call rings on his computer. A loud pinging noise with an incessant buzz fills the room of his study. He nearly jumps out of his skin. He’s going to get caught by her invitation. Soon he accepts. It’s in the middle of the night and Mira is up in his room, his Daughter fast asleep. She was a mess that one, not willing to sleep if he didn’t act out her stories. He was a knight in tonight’s redemption. His heart hurts. Fuck, he’s going to have to be careful. Since Mira came back from her trip, he has been paranoid. He honestly didn’t give a shit about her relations.

He was too invested in talking to his inamorata. Because of Mira’s arrival, he hadn’t gotten to in half a month. Missing their encounters. Yearning for them. It’s driving him insane, losing contact. She smiles up at him through the viewfinder. It’s pitch black and he can only make out her face. The light from her screen is the only one emitting luminosity. She’s under a surface. A blanket? He smiles. How perfect. Such a rellrounded girl hiding like a child. Although, he pouts solemnly, craving to see her beauty forthright.

“You’re like Batman brooding in his cave.”

He stifles a laugh, biting his lip. Smiling wide he nods.

“Maybe I am. You can’t debunk it.”

She smirks, eyes lighting up at the playful banter. He’s missed this, missed the poking at each other to receive a reaction. He’s always surrounded by chaos and fighting. Being around her, it seems that such things don’t exist. Their world is a utopia, and he’s happy if it’s only them who survive there.

“Pretty sure that Batman isn’t a professor.”

He nods. She’s as quick as ever, keeping him on his toes. It’s a battle to make her not quirk a response. There’s always a reply. She’s just so responsive. He licks his lips, throwing in the bait to see her riposte.

“Pretty sure that Batman’s cock isn’t as big as mine.”

Ah, yes. He brings out the grotesque themes of their relationship. The meaningless fucking that has blossomed into a desire to see her. Kiss her lips and cheeks. Cradle her head into his chest, wondering if she can hear his heart soar. He needs to remind himself that he can’t mingle with her. Be treated like he's twenty years younger. Maybe his response is ludicrous and she will be turned off from the bluntness. She’s so detached from it all that she doesn’t even blink an eye.

She barks out an electronic laugh before clamping a palm over her mouth, eyes wide. Now he wants to know why his cock is growing at the sight. A fetish he didn’t know he had, most likely. He wonders if her roommate is there. The idea has him hardening instantly. Trying to keep quiet for him, like he is for her. He sees her shift, leaning over the camera to retrieve some earbuds she’s used in his class. Her breasts were hidden under a baggy shirt. He can see the outline however and he’s filled with out righteous lust to find that she’s not wearing a bra. She sits back on her thighs, inputting the wire into her laptop. Two white wires lead into one connected source.

“So dirty, old man.”

He huffs, crossing his arms over his chest. Forearms broadening. His white tee hugging his muscles. The Star of David necklace wrapped around that thick neck. He quirks up a thick eyebrow on his forehead. Questioning her status. He takes quick notice of the way her eyes flick downwards on her screen. She’s never had a problem with his age before, and now she has something to say about it? He’s taken aback. He remembers her saying something that him being older was alluring. That she values the intellect he holds. He turns it onto her.

“Should be worried about what this old man is going to do to you, little girl.”

He says, voice dipping an octave lower. His arms uncross and a hand goes to cup himself over his clothed cock. Teasing himself. His hair pushed back carelessly. Not in his pristine style. It’s nice seeing him in such a way. Laid back and careless. Only wanting to talk to the girl he’s interested in. She bets he smells so divine. Like honey and milk. Her thighs seared with ripples of pleasure forming. The domestic life he's letting her glimpse into. It’s been too long since she’s last had him. She hasn’t even looked in any other male presence since him. She needs him to let her release the pent up frustration. But she can’t, not without his help.

“Such as?”

She pries. Sitting cross-legged on her twin bed. She moves the monitor up her body to her face. His mouth waters. One of her hands plays with the loose shirt she has on. She’s toying with him and he’s not stupid. He knows how the younger woman plays but he bites, anyway.

“I had this dream about you.”

She tilts her head to the side, hands skimming flat up to her breasts.

“Oh?”

She whispers and he wettens his lips. The hand that was cupping his length runs up his torso. Under the loose waistband of his sweats. Toying with the ribbon like ties.

“Yeah, thinkin’ about it a lot, actually. We were in Israel,”

“Israel?”

She asks, shocked. Eyebrows rocketing across her forehead. His hand follows downwards to the expanse of his plush thigh. Close to where he needs, but sweeps the thumb by the side of his sac. He refrains himself from rolling his eyes in the back of his head.

“Mhm. In Israel, in a mansion.”

“A mansion?”

She questioned again. And there’s that quick thinking he loved. Her lips perk into a smile as she rolls a bud in her fingers. A frown deepens on his face. His fingers scratched at the base of his cock.

“Yes, now shut up so I can finish.”

He spits out sternly. Not an ounce of jest in his words. Her mouth closes immediately, hips bucking at the tone. Similar to the one he uses at work when a student did something wrong. Fuck, she should do something bad that would make him use it more. He cups his balls, and he’s stretching the elasticity of his joggers. The head of his cock pushing up at the side, begging to be let free. He doesn’t reprimand himself.

“In Israel in a mansion. I and you, on the silk sheets of a bed. However, I was on my back and you were,”

His lips part as he pants. His hand wraps around the base, holding himself. His head leans back, and he sighs. He builds up suspension with his little groans. He knows that she’s hanging on every single breathy moan. On every word he’s ridding her of.

“You were dripping on my lips.”

His hips thrust up into his hand. Her eyes widen and she pulls at her nipples. Breathing fastening to where she’s gasping for breath. Oh. Then a thought runs through her pretty head. What if he was sleeping next to his spouse. Dreaming of her while he rests. Shivers run up her spine.

“I could smell and taste you, your thighs around my head. And pretty girl, fuck-“

As he starts to fist himself, finally jerking himself off at a rapid pace. He’s lost for words, utterly and completely. His thumb traces over his head and he’s almost crying. God, he misses her. Not just her cunt that’s too tight, but the smell of her. The softness and linen smell of her. The taste he can’t have. He lifts his hips up, pushing his sweats down his broad legs. Encompassing her a view, he knows she’ll be appreciative of. She always praises his cock. Always wants to have it in her, near her. He didn’t know if he corrupted her to be such a filthy girl or if she already was. He doesn’t know, but he mumbled praises about how good she looks.

“I miss you.”

He moans heavily, almost where his scrupulous voice lives. One of her hands travels under her panties. Quickly rubbing short little circles on her clit. Her head hits her wall with a soft thunk. He wants to know why he wants to kiss it, to say that she’s okay. Treat her like a child. The muscles in his thighs draw up and he’s whining.

“I miss you most. Making me stay in this hell.”

She gripes. He should’ve known she would say something like that. The college was below par, to say the least. The people were insane. People desecrate in the halls, let alone fornicate. She was close to finishing, about a semester off. So she shut her mouth and lived through it. He made it less horrible, worthwhile. But without him there, it hurts more so than she wished to admit. He was her saving grace, and he wasn’t here, so who was going to save her?

As much as she hid the yearning feeling, he knew and felt similar, if not intensified. If he could do it without being expelled from the system of education, he would take her away. Move out of this godforsaken place and start fresh, with her by his side. But the world wasn’t promising. His eyes soften from the cold black coffee to a warm, hot chocolate. Swimming in remorse behind the clouds of glass. His throat tightens up as he yanks languidly at himself. He feels like shit and it was hard to tiptoe around Mira. He wants better for the young girl in front of the screen. She deserves better than him. He swallows the boil down his throat.

“I’m sorry. I really am, sweetheart. I’ll find a way to make it up to you.”

He sees the way her body grows stiff. The way she usually does when she is close to her orgasm. The calm before her thrashing chaos. His hips buck instantly at the sight. He can feel his cum rolling down his fingers, getting caught in the webs of his fingers.

“Oh, yeah? How’re you going to do that, old man?”

He sighs, shaking his head. Hiding a smile. She tears him up through and through. Done to the bone. That sharp mouth of hers makes his skin crawl. Every time he lives in fear of her response. He thinks of his answer. How was he going to make it up to her? Before he knows it, he’s babbling.

“Next weekend, the paperwork will be served. You can ngh-“

A specific tug has him on the verge of flying head first off into his peak. The fantasy of her in his house parading around in one of his sweaters that is no doubt too big for her has him rolling. He pants furiously, in need of his inhaler.

“Y-you can stay with me until graduation.”

Time freezes as his voice gravels out those precious words. Her heart picks up and the world swirls around her. Such a funny thing, this occurrence. Her huddled under a blanket, laptop sat on a tiny bed that barely fit her. Earbuds tangled, and her voice was barely audible trying to keep quiet to not awaken her roommate. But she’s fingering herself, hand grabbing at her tit. Her shirt rose on her waist. And him. Hiding from his not so secret family. In his den, half curled over, biting his fist as he cums so hard it’s spurting onto his white tee. Her saving grace has offered her salvation. Out of this horrid place. For a limited time. She can’t think straight, but she’s jumping on the promise.

“Deal.”

His heart grows too big for his chest. His tawny cheeks burned red. He only half thought she would agree. The haven he's going to reside in with her has his cock twitching. A few pearls leaving his tip. He watches her face turn into a masterpiece. Eyes closed, mouth open, fingers curling. Legs parted wide. He tugs off his shirt. Careful to not let his face touch the dampness on the surface. Brown skin with defined lining, tufts of dark hair across makes her cross-eyed. Legs spasming closed and a harsh bite onto her bottom lip to stifle the too obscene whimper. He wipes himself off with his once white shirt, tugging up his sweats. He smiles, a crooked grin. His index points at her half-lidded eyes. Her fingers pulling out as a pool forms under her hips. He pushes an eyebrow on his forehead. Pointing a finger at the screen. In his authoritative panty dropping voice he says.

“Under one exception: you can’t call me old man unless it’s under adulation.”

Act III

The first night was torture. He didn’t even cum, just toyed with her body into the multiple she’s given him. She’s a rag doll at this point. Her body is limp to where she can’t even lift a finger without her pussy fluttering. After she physically could not give him anymore of the high. With eyes dumb and cunt sore, she laid there.

He kissed her forehead, whispered sweet words, and left. Leaving to grab a washcloth, made sure the water was warm, not hot. Pressed it between her thighs that had dark sores where his beard had been. Carefully swiping up and down to capture the essence of her. He threw it into the hamper beside his bed, opening a drawer to grab a fluffy blanket. The soft material made his palm tickle. He guided her to lift her hips up so she wouldn’t have to lay in a puddle. He didn’t have the heart to make her stand on wobbly legs. If she could stand. By the way, she’s wincing at his touch. He’s not so sure. She turns on her side, reaching up to press a soft kiss to his lips. Whining when he leaves but shortly falling asleep after. Her face to the side of the bed.

Mouth parted, eyebrows pinched as she dreams. He raises the duvet onto her scorching hot skin, tucking the hem under her chin. There’s nothing sexual about it but his heart bursts. He smiles to himself before walking into the bathroom. Shutting the door the quietest he possibly can. He opens the shower door, turning the faucet on. The pellets hit the tile with a heavy splatter. He takes his glasses off; the steam fogging them up, anyway. Putting them by the sink before stepping inside. He closes his eyes, basking in the warmth. The dampness on his skin exudes now being cleansed. He doesn’t know why he feels like it’s necessary, why he’s obligated to bathe after. He just feels the need to. He can’t have her lingering on him; it'll drive him crazy. Even the aftershocks he gets after eating her cunt stay in his beard for weeks after. It’s almost haunting him. Taunting him with her absence. But if he could, he would live between her thighs. The cloth in his hands starts to soak up the grime off his chest. The suds of his soap coats him, making him glimmer with bubbles.

After he’s imagined what he’d do if she was occupying the small rectangle with him, he turns the faucet off. Stopping to grab a towel, dabbing over the falling droplets. Running the fabric over his crevices. He wraps it around his long torso. One hand holds it in place, while the other grabs his glasses. He pushes his wet hair off his forehead, a few straggling curls stay sticken to his face. He looks fucked, to say the least. Streaks of red run down his chest, to his lower stomach. Just a few inches away from his cock. He knows it’s worse on his back. He can feel the welts as he moves. His beard glistens with the water that’s still captured there. He’s enamored by how lean he’s gotten. The muscles in his body are growing taut. He’s astonished since he hasn’t done anything out of his regimen. The only thing he has change was the amount he’s been fucking her. With his now ex spouse out of his house he can do whatever he pleases whenever he wants.

The only thing stopping him is himself, the salt in his hair isn’t just for the looks. His libido is high but his body can’t keep up with him. With one more quick glance he strides out of his bathroom. Seeing the soft inhale and heating her snore does something to him that’s inexplicable. That thing makes his cock harden. A tent forms in the towel and he rolls his eyes. Maybe his body was intact with his drive. His grip on the towel grows. The fucking things this girl makes him do will be the death of him. He walks to the side she’s sleeping on. Cherishing her beauty to mind. A strange idea comes to his head during this viewing. He slips his glasses off his face, precipitation stains the glass. He pauses, thinking momentarily before slotting them onto her face.

In his opinion the thin wired frame with the hazy specs suits her better. They’re awkward with how they’re perched since she’s asleep but he likes the look of it. She shifts and her mouth falls open wider. He’s a bad man, he tells himself as he drops the towel to the floor. His cock in hand, he works himself. His eyes blurry without his prescription, nonetheless he focuses on her face. He runs his thumb over the tip and he’s groaning. He leans forward slightly. Positioning himself over her lips. He rubs the ruddy head over them. Smearing his pre-cum on the bow. He bites his lips, brows furrowed as he pushes in. He’s only sitting in her mouth, unmoving. So much for that shower.

He ruts his hips so half of his length is laid out on her tongue. She’s asleep, he reminds himself. But with the way her lips are curling around him makes him think that he’s wrong. His hand remains wrapped around the hilt. Trying to restrain himself. He pushes small thrusts into her mouth, half in, half out. His other hand pushes her hair from her face. He loses himself and finally pushes his length fully into her mouth, and down the back of her throat. She gags around him and pulls back startled. But surely she’s awake by now. She’s sputtering around him and pulls his sloppy wet self out of her mouth. Her eyes blink dreamily up at him under his glasses, her eyes magnified. He smiles, only one of the sides of his mouth peaking up.

“Mornin’ pretty girl.”

She looks at him, still disoriented. Her head whips to the window. Dark as ever.

“It’s not?”

His head tilts downwards as a nod. Agreeing with her.

“I know. Just go with it, yeah?”

She bows her head. Smiling up at him. He walks over to his side of the bed, laying down by her. He scoots until his chest is pressed against her back. She can feel how hard he is on her ass. His arms wrap around her waist, under her breasts. Hands flat and fingers spread. She pulls a hand up to his hair, scratching her nails lightly on his scalp. Her fingers damp from how saturated his curls are. She wonders if he’s making a wet spot on his bed, similar to hers. He nuzzles his face into her neck, his beard brushing her. He kisses along her shoulder, craning his neck.

“I honestly don’t know how you can see.”

He snorts a laugh. He can’t really. Without them, he can barely make out distant shapes.

“With practice makes perfect.”

She scoffs as one of his hands travels down her stomach. Playing with the short hair on her mound.

“Do you honestly believe that?”

He thought about his answer for a moment. Before nodding into her shoulder. His fingers cupped her thigh to lift it over his hip.

“Can I kiss you?”

He asks softly, almost a whisper. She grants him his wish. He lays flat on his back, pulling her to his chest. Her legs were on either side of his waist. Her face to his. Noses brushing.

“Hi.”

She smiles widely. His hands cup the side of her face before kissing her. Long and slow. Full of insecure thoughts and emotions. He still hasn’t come to terms with how he feels about her, but all he knows is that he cares deeply about her well-being. And if he makes her happy, then he’s glad to be of use. He doesn’t want to say he loves her, because the word doesn’t match with how strongly he adores her. What he thought was love with Mira was the complete opposite of his flower. Every breath, every beat of his heart, belongs to her. He’s not a sap, but if it were to ever come to it, he’d die for her. His beard scratches against her face.

He simply lives for her. He feels her fingers in the wefts of his hair, massaging the thickness. He pouts everything he feels about her into the kiss. He hopes that she’ll understand, and the grinding of her hips. His work is being taught. As her tongue touches his, she can taste him. Marlboro cigarettes and coffee that he probably brews himself. The scent floods into her. Cinnamon and lavender, she wonders if that’s from his soap or his cologne. His hands flatten over her back, pushing her down to him. Her breasts are full against his chest. He’s kicked into a part of his brain that’s primal. Eyes locked on her nipples that barely peek out from beneath her. She pulls away, both parties huffing for air. The glasses slipping off her face.

“How do you do anything with these?”

She pulls herself up on his chest to slide them up the bridge of her nose. He tilts his head to the side, admiring her. She’s just so alluring. The way she holds herself to the divots in her skin. He loves all of it. She lifts an eyebrow, confused.

“What?”

She asks, and he shakes his head. Wet curls swaying.

“Nothin’, you just look beguiling.”

She rolls her eyes, scrunching up her nose. She slaps his chest, laughing. He smiles.

“You think I’m deceptive?”

He blinks cluelessly. Her face snapping into a pout.

“That’s mean, ya know, calling someone a liar.”

His lips twitch up into a ghost of a smile. He tries to hide it but she’s so adorable when he gets under her skin.

“Remind me to never compliment you.”

He mumbles, he pokes fun at her, and she groans. Exaggerating an eye roll.

“Could've said gorgeous or something.”

He shakes his head. In an instant, she’s on her back, and he’s hovering above her. His cock seated over her core. It quivers by the touch. She’s more stunned at how hard he is. It seems that he’s never soft.

“Those don’t suit you, little cherub.”

His nose nudges into her jaw as he kisses her neck. Sucking the marks he wanted for the past half year so she can’t hide it. What spurs him on is the thought that when the questions arise as to how she got them. She can’t say the older professor who fucks her until she can’t walk. He wonders what her answer will be. He kisses down her neck.

“I enjoy beguiling. Bewitching even.”

He kisses her collarbone, nipping. Before licking the skin.

“Body and soul.”

He grins when she hits him on his shoulder.

“What a fraud! Stealing from Austen.”

He sighs, laying his head between her breasts. He wraps his arms around her. She massages his back. His breath fanning on her chest.

“I can’t win, can I?”

He sighs, kissing the side of her tit.

“Afraid not, poet.”

He leans up, his forearms on either side of her head. She pulls her legs up and over his hips.

“If I’m a poet, then you shall be my muse.”

She nods, agreeing.”

“So it shall.”

The end of her sentence turns into a breathy whine as he enters her. The ruddy head splitting her open. His length is halfway before he moves out, then pushes more. His face pushed into the side of her neck, continuing to mark her, then soothe her wounds. She’s crying, loud yelps and pleas for him to fuck her. To use her. He rolls his hips subtly, long languid strokes. Never pushing into that spot deep inside her. He doesn’t need to with the way she’s contracting around him. Her cunt gulped him up with the loudest squelch. The hair around the base of him scratches along her folds.

“So noisy, neighbors are going to hear.”

She cries louder, and he smirks. Slotting himself fully into her, all the way down his shaft. His balls up against her ass, her legs crushing him. And then he moves. His hips lifting back, the only thing in her pussy the tip. He rams his hips back into her. Pushing her up the bed. She yelps, clawing at the bruises on his back. It was hot and electric, bounding the two. Emitting a currency shared. Pulling and taking. He lifts himself on his hands, flat by her head. Pulling his knees under her thighs. He pulls her ankle to his shoulder. Holding it between his shoulder and neck.

His hair hides his eyes, but she’s sure that they’re wild with lust. His hand wraps around the bones in her ankle. He thrusts deeper and shallow into her. He can feel her walls convulse around him, signaling that she’s close. The cacophony of the clap and shared moans has him nearing, too. His mouth was hot and soaking on her ankle. When she cums, her already abused cunt pushes his cock out. He stills, sitting back on his calves, waiting for a reaction. He lets her leg fall. He watches her cum pour onto the blanket and between her thighs. She pushes a hand to his abdomen, telling him to wait. Her pussy fluttered.

“You want me to stop?”

He asks, running the crown of his cock over her folds.

“No.”

She whimpers, and he growls. His glasses on her face a-skewed.

“What do you want, pretty girl?”

“For you to cum.”

He pistons his hips into her in one fluid thrust. Buried himself in and out of her rapidly. He bends her leg to her chest. He kisses her as he floods her pussy. His lips leave as he pants for air. He mouths at her jaw, his eyes closed. He fixes the position of his glasses on her nose. Letting your leg to fall to his side. He doesn’t pull out; he lets the fluids sit in her. Marinating in her womb. He lays his feverish forehead on hers. Breathing her in, basking in the feeling of her. Afraid that if he moves, he won’t have her anymore. So he stays, cock inside her. Body collapsed like a weighted blanket on her. She plays with the hair at the nape of his neck. As he kisses the bruises on her neck. He knows he is a sick man, hoping that her reproductive system takes.

Interlude II

Jonathan takes his glasses from his eyes. Staring blankly at the last sentence. Trying to wrap his head around. What exactly did he just fucking read? There’s an italic at the end at the bottom. His stomach churns and twists disturbingly. There’s no way you didn’t write this about him. Most of it was unnervingly accurate, things he hadn’t told a single soul about. But you did. You knew everything. Was he really that easy to read? Before he can even recoup, his fingers are typing in a three digits of one hundred. In the suggestions, he writes:

“Meet me at the coffee place on Broadway at ten am. I’d like to discuss your afflatus.”

And with that, he shuts the brim of his computer. His head tilted to the ceiling. Dreaming of what he was going to talk to you about in the morning.

The end?

#jonathan levy #scenes from a marriage #jonathan levy x reader #Jonathan levy x reader smut #Jonathan levy x reader fluff #Jonathan levy x reader angst #Jonathan levy x you #Jonathan levy x y/n #oscar issac x reader #oscar isaac fanfiction #oscar isaac x reader angst #oscar isaac x reader fluff #oscar isaac x reader smut

3K notes · View notes

jeanbie · 9 days

Text

WORDLESS #5 ★ masterlist.

pairing: levi x reader

genre: sugar daddy & contract killer au | warnings: implied violence, establishing feelings, mentions/references to john wick & the continental | wc: 6.8k

note: who expected me to actually finish this? (answer: no one) i'm so glad that i got to finish "wordless" and put these two losers in a place they deserve to be in! this chapter is the finale and also almost entirely from levi's pov, and this one flows in a chronological order :)

★ ch1. ch2. ch3. ch4. ch5

⏤ Sometimes, saying “I love you” is inappropriate, and given your circumstances, you think it might send Levi over the edge if he hears them again. But maybe he's ready now.

(41) Giving them space when they express wanting to have some time alone.

It’s been a hot second since Levi saw you — and it’s killing him more than he’d care to admit.

Since the blow up in the shower over girls he wasn’t fucking in the first place, Levi hasn’t heard from you, and he hasn’t made much of an effort to reach out either.

Why did he even lie? There was no benefit from telling you he was seeing other girls; the only reason he said that so often was to manage the healthy boundaries between you, to remind you not to get too close, to remind himself that being with you is a risk.

Not that pushing you away has made his life any easier. On the contrary, he thinks it’s made everything worse.

It is almost dehumanising to admit it to himself, but he misses you. Since your rather unconventional first meet — which was a far cry from any ‘meet cute’ that normal situationships had — Levi has been telling himself that the circumstances surrounding you being in his life were unique at best, and that you weren’t permanent.

But now, he lives his life around a ghost of your body, making room for you in his home, making time out of his schedule, making arrangements to keep you happy.

Okay. Maybe it’s a little bit too late to acknowledge the feelings he has for you. Levi knows they’re there — he’s not an idiot. But making those feelings real is something he just can’t afford to do. Not yet. Not while there’s too much going on in his life.

Still, he stares longingly at the door every night when he staggers back home, as if hoping you might take him by surprise and crawl back into his arms. Not that you do, at least not for a while; not until Levi grows fed up of waiting and finds you first.

But for now, he’ll grant you he space that you need, the space you deserve. And in the meantime, he’ll try and make peace with the waging war in his head.

(42) Holding their hand while walking, even if there isn’t a crowd.

“This is nice.”

The neighbourhood Levi now lives in is much smaller than the last one. It pales in comparison to the condo it took forever to finally move out of, but having consistent security breaches just for a tiring view of the river didn’t feel worth it for Levi anymore. It made no difference to him if the apartment he all but owns for you is much farther away — you’re barely ever there, anyway.

Since putting his angst to rest, and since making it known to you that you’re quite literally the only woman he likes enough to keep buying houses for and invite over, things have been calm between you.

There’s still a strange unspoken thing, the remains of an agreement made out of convenience so long ago, to feed both the lust and pride Levi wanted and the safety you craved; but in general, Levi acknowledges that what he has with you right now feels like the closest thing he’s had to a partner in a long, long time.

Levi looks over at you, feeling your hand tighten in his as you cross a cute little park covered in flowery bushes and beds of tulips.

“I’m glad my neighbourhood has your stamp of approval,” he replies, tightening his fingers around yours before pulling up slightly to stuff your joined hands into his pocket. Though it’s spring now, there’s still a bite in the air, a chill that Levi is determined to shelter you from.

“Technically,” you start, and Levi can predict, like a robot, what you’ll say next, and mouths the words as they fall from your lips, “it’s mine, too.” Your eyes turn piercing as you scowl at him, “Hey! Don’t…predictive text me.”

“Then stop being so predictable.”

“I think we spend too much time together,” you mutter, looking back at the flowerbed you’re currently passing by.

Levi scoffs to himself and playfully scratches a nail against the hand lodged in his pocket.

“Then go away,” he says. No chance, is what runs through his head, and the coy smile you flash him is as equally predictable as the word he knows you’ll say next, starting with n and ending in o.

(43) Holding shopping bags that are too heavy for them.

Ever since Levi figured out how to share locations, he’s become obsessed with watching you move around on the map on his phone. Numerous times, he’s slipped up on spending hours watching your little circle move, sometimes not even moving at all.

If you had any complaints, he hasn’t heard them, though he very much doubts that you’ll complain in the future now that his stalking has worked out in your favour.

You might have initially thought that bumping into Levi outside the supermarket was a rather delightful coincidence — that was until he moved across the city, and has no real business in your area unless it concerns you.

“Perfect timing,” you say once you see him crossing the small car park in your direction. He has half a mind to pretend he hasn’t seen you and keep walking, but watching you struggle with your shopping is painful enough.

He grunts, reaching for the bag that is squeezing the blood from your fingers. “Don’t get proud about it.”

Sniggering, you happily let Levi grab the overweight bags and fall into an even step beside him.

“Why do you have so much stuff?” Levi huffs. To be fair, the bags aren’t that heavy, but he can’t see any reason for you to have bought so much considering you live at his house more often than you do your own. “You gonna share this shit?”

“If you want,” you reply. “You paid for it.”

His tongue clicks. Levi hasn’t paid you a penny since he last felt guilty about the fact he rarely paid you, despite that being the very foundation of your relationship in the first place, but even with what he paid you and hasn’t since that point, he knows your bank account is more than comfortable. Paying for all of this has barely made a dent, but that’s what the money’s there for.

He makes his way to his car pulled up outside the car park turning in a layby and struggles in his pocket for his keys.

“I live five minutes away,” you remind him, steps slowing.

“No, you just said you’d share it, so we're going to mine.”

With a sigh, you’re left with no other choice but to follow him to his car. “You know, the romance of you carrying my bags is lost now you’ve only walked it to the car.”

Before he pops open the boot of the car, he turns to you and sneers, “You want me to walk back and let you do it yourself?”

There’s no argument to be had. You get into the car.

(44) Standing between them and a busy road.

Habits. Levi hates to keep track of how many he’s developed since you entered his life almost two years ago. Time has gone by so quickly since the day he first met you, in the worst way possible, but since then, he’s transformed into a whole new person, a whole new paranoid man who overthinks everything because there’s no other option.

His habits as of late include worrying about you whenever you’re not around — whenever he’s at work, he’ll think of you. Whenever he’s in a different city or country, Levi will obsessively worry over what you might be doing, who might be on your trail, scenting your every move while you’re vulnerable. Another habit includes feeling like an overbearing parent even when he’s in the same five mile radius, but at least he’s self aware of it.

If you’ve noticed Levi becoming more clingy, less like who he swore he’d never change from, you haven’t mentioned it yet. Perhaps a small mercy to save him the mortifying task of admitting that he has feelings stored away for you.

Today, Levi has fallen victim to his habits of worry and has walked himself all the way to your university just to walk you all the way back home. His home, not yours. In a sense, your home, too. In an unspoken way.

Levi stands waiting for you in the overhang, gaze trained on the thick grey sky until he hears your class file out of the building in a chatter. Sasha is who he sees first, followed by another one of your friends he’s never met but has seen on Instagram once or twice, and then he sees you, looking thankfully in good spirits, and all too beautiful for your own good.

When you see him standing with his hands in his pockets, he allows himself the pleasure of pride when you break away from your friends just to join him, the smile on your face so genuine and radiant that he has to scoff in amusement.

“Hey, you,” you call, falling into his arms.

“Hey, yourself.”

“I didn’t know you were coming today,” you confess, pulling away to stare curiously at his withdrawn expression. Levi is already twisting an arm around your waist to walk you down the step and across the lawn. “I told Sasha I’d go to her café and wait for her shift to end. Didn’t you have that thing today?”

“What thing?” he mutters.

“The thing with Erwin. And some deadbeat called George, or something.”

“How many Korean men do you know named George?” Levi deadpans, though his arm does tighten around you in caution. “You shouldn’t even know about that. How do you even know?”

The busy road widens into view as you leave the closed campus. Levi’s pretty much counting the days before you graduate and never have to come here again, and the time is passing strangely slow in that department. It feels like it’s been ages since you enrolled, and he wants nothing more than for you to leave and become the greatest journalist in the world — or whatever it is you even want to do when you’re done.

As you walk, you lean into Levi’s side, furthering the distance between yourself and the road bustling with cars and buses. He frowns.

One of your habits since the accident on the bridge with your family had been to avoid busy roads, as if convinced something might happen again. You’ve told him numerous times that it’s irrational, but Levi doesn’t think so. It’s a very normal thing to feel afraid of everything, even when those things are a little on the unrealistic side.

Naturally, it results in Levi sliding his arm from around your waist and replacing it with his other one, positioning himself between you and the chaotic lines of commuting cars going home.

His heart flips when you smile at him for it, linking your arm around his while moving your waist out of his grip. Levi tries not to let it get to his head how much you trust him, how much he cares for you. But by the minute, he’s losing the will to keep it hidden.

(45) Rubbing the back of their hand with a thumb.

Back to habits, there are some that Levi has that he’s not particularly as proud of. But, as expected, you’re as good as it gets, and any habit he thinks he might have gotten away with hiding, somehow you pick up on it.

Levi flicks through a blueprint laying flat over his kitchen table, his hands nervously drumming the edge of the tabletop as he tries to memorise the elaborate labyrinth of a building he’ll be breaking into later to find his next hit. Usually, Levi has you at his home before and just after taking a job, just to eliminate the threat of you being hurt as a punishment.

He wishes that the company gave you unrestricted entry and protection without him being there to clear it, but in order for that privilege, Levi needed to address you as his partner, which just felt like an even larger target on your head. So, he settles for his home, though the worry does not cease.

This building is riddled with passageways and vaults, basement levels with so many access points that studying them feels intense. One wrong recollection could come at the cost of his life, and at the minute, his life has increased in value. Things are finally going right for him, it would be a shame to have it all taken away from him again.

A text from Erwin sounds next to him, and Levi all but glances at the screen to see what’s happening. All assistance available should he need it — he almost sighs with relief at the words.

In the past, Levi had thought he could never work in cohorts with other hitmen, but becoming partners with Erwin and his henchmen has been working in his favour.

Still, it doesn’t hurt to learn the layout off by heart. So, Levi pours himself over the blueprints and maps, memorising every detail, becoming so engrossed in it that he barely even hears you letting yourself inside of his apartment.

Your shoes hit the wall with a noise that makes him suddenly aware of your arrival, and he glances up to see you peeking into the kitchen, eyes scanning the room for any unfortunate signs of Elio before you approach him.

He notices the street market bag and inhales the smell of spice before looking back at the maps. “Hope you’re gonna share that.”

“Of course,” you reply, offended he even thought you might not. You place the container of tteokbokki on the table before sliding around to his side, eyes glued to the rolls of paper. “Where’s this?”

“Less you know, the better,” he mutters, leaning his head into your mouth as you kiss his jaw.

For a while, you say nothing, letting Levi memorise what he needs to while you assess the prints for yourself. Eventually, you shift your hand over his and squeeze, making him glance at you sideways.

You’re looking at him already, though you can’t see his eyes from the way he’s hunched over. Spotting Levi’s signs of anxiety must be incredibly easy, because somehow you’ve caught on, and begin to rub the back of his hand with your thumb, nose pressed into his bicep.

“Come eat,” you suggest quietly, after a while of basking in the silence with him.

He grunts, a typical Levi sound, and nudges you away. Though, you only shuffle to the drawer to fetch two forks — forks! He scoffs, rolling his shoulders as he rounds the table to take one from your fingers.

“Easier to stab with a fork,” you offer as an explanation.

“If my mother was here to see me eating tteokbokki with a fork, she’d lose her goddamn mind.”

“Well…” You start, trailing off after a moment. You’ve got nothing to say; he’s won the argument just by bringing Kuchel up, and both of you know it.

Scowling, you stab another wedge of tteok and chew it furiously, meanwhile Levi smirks to himself, victorious.

(46) Giving them a back massage when they flop on the couch or bed.

“I need to retire. I’m getting too old for this shit.”

“No way. How old are you now, like, twenty eight?”

“…I’m thirty.”

“Best looking thirty year old I’ve ever seen. Roll over, I’ll massage your back, if you want?”

If he ever refuses a massage from you, he’s an idiot.

Levi rolls over ungraciously, hitting the mattress on his stomach with a low groan. He rolls his shoulders, the bones cracking comically loud, and as you shuffle up to straddle his back, he groans again.

“Oh fuck off, I’m not heavy.”

Levi sniggers into the pillow, though as soon as your hands start to work their magic, he moans, the pleasure instantaneous.

“Make a house back there, if you want. Just don’t stop.”

(47) Staying up half the night to finish a game with them.

“I can’t do it if you’re not here, Levi. You need to get over here.”

“Do you not see that I’m trying?”

“You’re terrible at this game.”

Levi scoffs. He wouldn’t be so terrible if he actually knew how to play properly. His character begins to run in circles without him even asking him to, and Levi growls angrily.

“Fucks sake, this bitch is pissing me off.” Then, he wrangles the controller from your hands as you protest and says, “You be him instead.”

“But I don’t want to be Cody.”

“Me neither.”

As soon as you start moving little Cody around, Levi peers in scrutiny at the controller in your hand and how it so suddenly has stopped drifting on its own. There’s a circular dent in your inner cheek where your tongue is, and Levi scowls in your direction.

“You were sabotaging me,” he accuses, eyes focused back on May as she stumbles around uncoordinatedly.

“I think you’re just really bad,” you reply. Cody is moving fine, and finally, the mechanism moves and the story can progress. Hm.

Levi’s eyes bore into yours as you shift to face him, elbows snug in the blanket bundled around you both. Levi has been laying low for around two weeks now — he’s surprised with just how much he likes not having to work. Though, there have been a few times whilst playing this infuriating game where Levi has wished to be anywhere else.

“You’re good at a lot of things,” you tell him sincerely, “but just not games. And that’s okay. You tried.”

“I’m good at games,” he replies, offended.

You raise your eyebrows, “Like what?”

“Your animal living game.”

“Animal Crossing?”

“Sure, that too.”

All Levi has ever done on Animal Crossing is make a character and proceed to hit everybody with his fishing net, not to mention dig holes around your front door so you can’t get out. Still, you say nothing — the look of disbelief speaks volumes to Levi and he rolls his eyes, turning back to May as she wanders off to the side of the screen and falls off.

Okay. He’s bad at games. That he’ll admit. But you like it, and by the time he’s gotten the hang of the controls, it’s already four in the morning.

(48) Getting them a coffee just the way they like it.

Remember those habits?

“You remembered!”

If not just to see your smile, Levi likes to bring you one of the expensive bags of coffee from Erwin’s studio. You could quite easily buy the bags yourself, but there’s no thrill in ordering something and having it arrive in due time, not like there is in making Levi steal three at a time as he leaves a meeting or training session.

Levi sets the bags with a loud thud by the coffee machine and hums.

“And you got me a drink!”

Yes. He has also become a barista and familiarised himself with the exact way you like to drink your coffee. The takeout cup he also borrowed from Erwin is placed down by your laptop as you relentlessly type away at an assignment at Levi’s kitchen table, and he presses a kiss to your temple and mutters under his breath.

“Thanks, babe,” you say, already sipping at the steamy contents.

“It’s hot,” he points out. “You’ll only cry when you singe all your taste-buds off.”

“I will not—” You slurp, then hiss, “Ow!”

“I warned you.”

(49) Buying them a special treat when you go out shopping.

You know what? No. Levi has given up on pretending like he doesn’t enjoy you being in his grill all day, every day, which is the reasoning for why he ends up in an expensive jewellery store with Erwin one day after a long haul of inspecting an upcoming raid location.

In all honesty, Levi wants to put his work to rest once the raid is all over. It will be their riskiest ploy to date, and quite frankly, Levi’s tired. He’s been killing people for years, cutting at the humanity he has left, and back in the day he would have been very comfortable with being a monster, killing until he was killed.

But now he had you. Now, Levi had someone to care about, so deeply and so passionately that it often left him feeling sick.

“That’s called love, Levi,” is what Erwin had said when Levi chose the rare option of opening up when he tried to explain why he wanted to retire early.

“Love,” he scoffed. But then Erwin had said something profoundly wholesome, leaving Levi with a bitter taste in his mouth.

“You’re not unloveable just because you loved nothing for so long. I know it took you awhile to get back to where you are now, but just because love went wrong once before doesn’t mean it has to again. Besides, almost two years of your bullshit and that woman is still there — I don’t think you need to be worried about her pulling away from you once you tell her how you feel.”

Which roughly translated to: Buy her something nice and quash until you can’t any longer.

Once Levi gets home, he hears you giggling at something and finds you with a book over your face, your legs kicking as you squeal like a goblin. His face twists and he asks, “That book got jokes in it, or something?”

You peer around the spine and look at him. “They kissed. They. Kissed!”

“Who kissed?” Levi makes his way to the couch and takes a seat where you were just lying down. The cushions are warm — you’ve been here a while, and the thought makes him smile.

“Evangeline and Jacks. It’s all so perfect. I didn't like most of the book, but what matters is that they kissed,” you tell him, a little too excited. You plant your feet in Levi’s lap. “I love love, Levi. It is the greatest. I love books. Men written by women!”

“Why are you giggling over other men in my own house?”

“I giggle over you when you’re not around, too.”

He hums once from the back of his throat, watching as you mark the page with your bookmark and close the book before crawling into his lap and curling into his arms. He welcomes you instinctively, the blocky shape of the ring he bought in his pocket.

After smooching your lips for a long fifteen minutes, Levi pulls away and reaches for the box. “Got something for you.”

“Ooh, show me!”

He produces the little box and hands it to you, but when your eyes round and you hesitate in taking it, he worries.

“I’m not proposing,” he says quickly.

“Thank god. I was about to be very upset,” you sigh dramatically, finally taking the ring box. “Most unromantic proposal ever.”

“The fact you think I’d be that lousy with a proposal is actually really offensive.”

The genuine grumble in his voice puts a flutter in your stomach, though soon after, it simmers into a cool pit of shock when you flip open the box and see the most delicate, gorgeous ring that you’ve ever seen in your life, not counting ones you ogle in shopfronts.

Cautiously, you lift your head to peer at Levi’s expression. It’s not a proposal — he’s just told you so, and considering you’re not even his girlfriend in official terms yet, it seems unlikely that anything like that will be happening soon. But it has to be more than just an offhanded purchase, and you’re determined to figure out.

Levi’s eyes tremble as he looks between you and the ring. “Is it ugly?”

You immediately shake your head, “Of course not!”

“Put it on, then,” he urges. The steady beat of his heart stutters out of tempo. Suddenly, he feels quite nervous as he watches you take out the ring and study its appearance up close. “Need help?”

“Yeah, it’s so hard, I can’t figure out how to put it on. Needs instructions.”

Levi tuts and gently takes the ring from between your fingers, grabbing your ring finger whilst trying to look as casual as possible. Somehow, he manages to slide the ring on without making a fool of himself, but when he looks back at your face and sees gemstones of your own lining your waterline, he frowns.

“I’m not gonna sit here and give a speech,” he starts. By now, you know him better than that. He’s never opened up about his feelings to you, at least not without feeling regretful of it the morning after, and you nod simply, eyes catching the glint of the diamond. “But you know why I’ve bought it. I don’t need to tell you what you already know.”

And he doesn’t. Somehow, despite Levi being tremendously unromantic, having no manners, and in general being a terrible companion, you at least know that he cares. And with his upcoming job creeping up on you both, it doesn’t require an above-average intelligence to work out why this ring came when it did, what it means if things go south, what it means regardless.

“I know,” you tell him. “Thank you. It’s beautiful.”

Instead of saying anything, Levi curls you tighter in his arms and presses a kiss to your forehead, closing his eyes when you snuggle your face into his collar and relax.

His mind has been made, his plans set. As soon as the job is over, he doesn’t want to look back. Only forward, with the woman who has made him feel alive again.

(50) Giving them a tight hug that makes them lose their breath.

Something is wrong. Something is horribly wrong, and there’s nothing you can do about it.

It has been days since Levi told you he’d touched down in New York, working out some stuff in the very famous Continental until he was set to join Erwin on whatever mission they had planned and prepared for. Levi hadn’t told you the details this time because the risks were too high, and now, it feels like a major setback.

New York is on fire, and Levi barely kept his life getting out of the Silver Sword compound. An entire mob wiped out by two guys with no backup — it was practically unprecedented, unseen or unheard of since John Wick was knocking around.

The Continental had done everything right in the aftermath, including keeping Levi in their small infirmary for days whilst tending to his excessive wounds. Fuck, he had been so reckless, so vengeful, so stupid. It had almost cost him his life ensuring that no leads followed him and Erwin back to Seoul, and although he had succeeded in destroying every last bit of incriminating evidence, the risks had been too great.

When Levi finally gets discharged from the infirmary, it is almost eleven in the evening, and New York has finally calmed down and settled in for the night. Erwin greets Levi in the lobby, a frown on his face, holding a destroyed black bundle of phone parts that bear a striking resemblance to Levi’s missing device. He swears.

Levi hasn’t heard from you since he got here. Since the last risky job he took in Gwangju last year, you’ve never been lax while he’s been away; he can almost imagine your fear, your paranoia, and before he can even hear Erwin’s well wishes, Levi’s crossing the lobby for the customer payphone and dialing in your number.

The line rings twice before someone picks up.

“Baby?” Levi asks, after three attempts of saying your name and no coherent response. He cranes his head around the curly wire and glares at the clerk, though she looks less than pleased being interrupted by Levi, “Is this a global line?”

“Obviously, sir. It’s a telephone.”

“I fucking know it’s a telephone, but if it’s global, then why the hell isn’t it working?”

The girl gives him grief about his manners and Levi is forced to give up on calling you, slamming down the phone angrily and feeling his body growing hotter and hotter with worry.

He knows you're fine, in his house with the big cat you hate to love, but he knows you. He knows how you operate, how you worry, how you love him too much.

“Look, we’ll catch the first flight we can,” Erwin assures him as soon as Levi has caught his breath and taken a seat on one of the black leather sofas. His hands are shaking violently. “She’s fine. I promise.”

“I know she’s fine,” Levi grumbles.

“Then get a hold of yourself,” sighs Erwin, his frown low and face tired. “There’s nothing you can do but wait. I’ve got people waiting on me, as well, you know.”

“It’s not the same thing.”

“Dogs miss their owners just as much as girlfriends miss their boyfriends,” Erwin protests, because that’s all he has back home these days.

There had been a time where you had offered to set him up with your friend, Sasha, who deserved to be with a man who could handle her energy but also make her feel safe after her last terrible relationship, but Erwin is basically married to his work, and had got a dog despite Sasha being deathly allergic.

Still, Levi’s not heartless enough to know that Erwin isn’t missed by his dog, and probably other people in his life. And he’s right, there’s nothing he can do about the connection problems. All he can do is reign in his worries and wait.

The earliest flight they can find is the next morning, and Levi spends every second up to that point and up until he pulls up outside of his house in a complete state of panic. Would you be there? Did you leave, thinking he’d never come back?

Levi abandons his bag and leaves it in the backseat as he sprints from the car up the stairs, past his front door, and into his house. He kicks off his shoes once he’s in, the door hitting the wall with a booming slam.

He hears what he thinks might be scuffles, potentially even Elio’s claws, and right as Levi calls out your name, he sees you round the corner with a blotchy red face and feels his arms stretching out for you.

“What the fuck is wrong with you!” You slam into his chest, almost taking him to the floor, and encircle your arms around his neck so hard that the breath knocks out of his lungs. Still, he isn’t even annoyed; he squeezes you so tightly, tighter than he’s ever hugged anyone before, and shoves his face into your neck, inhaling the smell, feeling the way your body felt in memories while he was away.

“I’m sorry,” he says in a whisper, his features tugged in displeasure as you whimper into him, no doubt crying over his shirt. “I’m sorry, baby.”

“I thought you were dead!” you blurt, “I even cried on Elio’s back because I thought you had died! What’s the point in having a phone if you never pick it up or charge it?” You snatch yourself from his arms and gently beat against his chest with your fist. “I’m so pissed off at you!”

“I’m sorry that my phone got crushed,” he says, affronted that you would even think he’d ignore your calls on purpose. “I was in a hospital bed for three days! And then the bitchy receptionist got smart with me about their shitty phone, and I called but the line cut out. Sounded like a goddamn robot, I couldn’t hear a word you were saying.”

Your jaw drops, “That was you? I thought you’d died and some enemy gang guy was trying to call me to kill me!” Levi has to laugh at the look of worry on your face. He hasn’t been cared for in this way in a long time. Never been loved to this volume. “I unplugged the landline, I was so scared! Jesus Christ, Levi!” Then, like you never left, you rush back into his arms and let out a shaky cry.

“You did the right thing,” he tells you. Unplugging the landline was the silliest thing he could have ever thought of, but then he realises that you’re still here, and that you made peace with Elio just because you thought he had died.

Levi strokes the back of your head and shushes you, feeling your heartbeat hammering furiously against his chest. His is most likely the same, though he’s not so eager to acknowledge his own feelings.

After a while of standing there, and after Levi’s stroked behind Elio’s ears when he prowls towards them and rubs his head on Levi’s trousers, Levi looks back at you softly and takes everything in.

He has missed you more than anything, grieved the missing piece of his soul that is shaped like you. And, while he’s at it, yes! Fucking hell! He loves you!

“I’m so glad you’re okay,” you tell him, and Levi kisses you, his hands cradling your face. The kiss is firm, desperate, though he has no intention of walking you backwards towards the bedroom like he normally does after a job.

Instead, he pulls you in for a hug again.

“I missed you,” he mutters. “So fucking much.”

“Me too.”

He says with his mouth pressed into your head, “I’m done with this shit. I’m not taking any more jobs.”

You twist out of his arms, eyebrows raised. “Really? Why? You love your job.”

“I hate my job,” Levi confesses. “I have too much to lose. I just wanna live my life. And make it all count for something.”

For a moment, you stand there, looking at his face so intently that he almost feels uncomfortable. But then, as a smile spreads over your face, Levi feels like he can finally breathe again, finally feel like himself.

“Alright. If that’s what you want, babe, then let’s do that.”

And we can do it together.

(51) Getting adjusted.

Levi forgot what it was like to be normal.

He now wakes up at whatever time he wants to, feeling next to him for the lump in the bed where you sleep. Once he knows you’re still there (because despite being retired, he doesn’t think the habit of making sure you’re safe will ever go away), Levi wakes up and starts his day.

Coffee for one becomes coffee for two. Levi never has to eat breakfast on his own, never sits alone on the sofa or sits in silence at the kitchen table. Levi has lost half of his sink counter space to your belongings, lost half of his wardrobe to your own clothes. There are so many shoes by his front door that it looks like a storefront.

Elio has a mother, in a strange, estranged, visitation-hours-only kind of way. Levi has made room for you in his life and you fit perfectly, so perfectly that he barely remembers what it ever felt like to live alone.

The shower is always filled with two people. Levi finds your things all over the house in the most bizarre places. He has candles on every coffee table, pictures in frames, finds your cardigans hanging over every chair. But he loves it. He loves it so much. He can’t imagine ever not having it, having you, having this life.

(52) Finally saying the words.

“This is my first time using this thing.”

“What?” you gasp as Levi comes to sit next to you on the balcony.

Elio yawns inside, sleeping on the couch. It is partly his fault that Levi’s out here in the first place, though the thought of being tucked beside you on the outdoor couch in a blanket, watching the sun sink behind the skyline, is thankfully rather appealing, and he voices no complaints.

Levi takes a swig of his whiskey and abandons the cup on the table, throwing an arm around your shoulder and pulling you close. It’s not exactly cold tonight, but he knows you too well, and knows that within an hour, you’ll be dithering next to him.

“Imagine having a balcony and never using it.”

“I’m using it now,” Levi huffs, pinching your neck. You squeal, “Fuck off, it didn’t hurt.”

You’ve been officially living in Levi’s home for two months now, although sometimes it feels like you’ve always been here. Still, despite you making yourself very much at home on the inside, neither of you have once come out to sit on the balcony, to bask in the lovely sun as it settles for the night, not until today.

“When’s Erwin coming?”

“Bout an hour or so,” Levi says in a low drawl, his head tilted back and hand massaging the side of your head. It had been your idea to invite a bunch of people over to your house — the house you now shared — and frightfully, Levi hadn’t opposed. It would be nice to share the wealth of simply being alive with people he now had the patience to care about.

You shuffle to look at him, and Levi picks up his head at the sound of you moving. Like always, Levi thinks you look beautiful, but since he’s made you his girlfriend, it has felt like every time he looks at you, he can’t breathe properly.

“I’m excited. This is our first time hosting a party together,” you grin, while Levi thumbs your ear and smiles. “Do you think Elio will eat Erwin’s dog?”

“No. Elio’s moved back onto a pescatarian diet, so I think Erwin’s mutt will be safe.”

“Good. I bought him a bone, do you think he’ll like it?”

“He’s a dog. Yes, I expect, why are you asking me this?” Levi asks, eyebrows scrunched, though he pulls you close to where his mouth is and kisses you straight on the lips. “Stop stressing.”

“I can’t help it. I’m nervous! It’s all so serious! What if nobody likes our house?”

He shrugs. “I don’t give a shit who does or doesn’t like our house. It’s ours.”

“Hnnngh. And I want you to have a good time!” you whine. “You deserve a bit of fun in your life.”

“My life is always fun now that you’re my girlfriend.”

He’s instantly won himself brownie points by saying that.

“Just tell me if it gets too much,” you mutter, lips on his, mouths together. “Okay?”

Levi hums. “Yeah.” Then, after he’s kissed you three more times and felt his heart shake, he nudges his nose against yours and says, “I love you, y’know that, right?”

You pause, eyes rounding wide as you take in the sight of him. Levi has never said those words before, not explicitly. But now is as good a time as any, right?

Levi has spent far too much of his life withdrawing from his emotions, hiding away from what matters most out of a fear of caring too much. In the past, he had cared too much and lost it all. You were never supposed to be something he cared about, but when it had happened, it happened so fast he hadn’t had the time to make sense of it all.

But now, now that he’s been through it all with you, ticked every box imaginable, become comfortable being vulnerable again, Levi thinks he’s finally ready to accept the love he deserves and dole it out to those who mean the most to him.

Your mouth moves against his, though he can’t understand the words coming out. He laughs, confused, and somehow manages to pull away and ask, “What’re you even saying?”

All for you to blubber out in a laugh, “I’ve been waiting for ages for you to say that!”

His heart bursts, chest soars. “You could have said it first.”

“I’ve said it before,” you protest, “in actions.”

He scoffs, “So have I.”

And he has, you really can’t deny it.

“Say it again, won’t you?” you ask sweetly, kissing the corner of his mouth, and Levi sighs, like asking that of him is simply too much.

“I love you. You make me very happy.” Levi groans when you cackle and squish the breath out of him with a hug, but this time, he sniggers too. Why waste the moment on pretending to be indifferent when he’s actually the happiest he’s ever been?

Levi Ackerman can finally say that he feels good. He feels safe, he feels content, he feels comfortable — and most of all, he feels loved. And in love. And totally at peace in the world with the person who makes him the happiest.

#levi ackerman #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi #aot levi #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan x reader #aot x reader #snk x reader #levi smut #levi ackerman smut #jeanbie

50 notes · View notes

ackerifle · 4 months

Note

What would yan!Levi do if he finds out that his wife has been taking birth control pills behind his back?

lover’s quarrel!

yan. househusband levi ackerman x breadwinner wife. reader

+ CW. — au: modern, attempted drowning, implied: non-con; implied past: forced marriage & relationship, stalking, breaking & entering; not proof-read.

levi is quiet; whether he is simply navigating day-to-day life and the woes that come with it, out running errands to continue the prosperous lifestyle the two of you have chosen to live together, cleaning and tidying up to his liking to maintain a well-kept and well-loved house, or driving an hour to your work and watching you work at the top of the forty floor building from his parked car to ensure you aren’t engaging in infidelity, levi is a quiet man. and because levi is a quiet man, he often carrie’s out the housework duties in complete and utter silence. but today, today he does not. humming softly, soothingly to an unknown melody, he happens to be rather content.

even if he was only preparing dinner for the two of you, the act itself was one levi would proceed to spend an unfathomable amount of time perfecting. it wasn’t out of the ordinary for him to do so, a doss act that demonstrated his devotion and respect to your precious time, levi always made dinner. but even so, today it was different, today it was special. an ode to commemorate your wedding anniversary, one levi certainly hasn’t cut any corners with, nor forgotten in the slightest. the thought alone makes him giddy with childish excitement and delirium, makes levi want to smile stupidly and lose track of time. what a silly notion, let it be known that he would be doing none of that, but one can dream.

perhaps if he could have remained in that quaint, fanciful state of mind, levi wouldn’t have made such a harrowing discovery. tilting towards the cabinets with one hand on the cupboard door and the other reaching blindly inside to search for a particular ingredient, levi could tell this was not what he was looking for. far from it, really, and he’s absolutely pissed.

a tiny clear bottle, no bigger than the span that measured the length of his forefinger, it was sealed haphazardly, and contained miniature tablets with rounded edges. with an incredulous look and an arrogant huff, levi raises the translucent container to the ceiling, inspecting it with a dark leer. there was no label to it, but he didn’t need one to know that you had gone behind his back and gotten your hands on birth control pills. you must have thought you were so smart too, removing them from the awful blister-pack covers and moving them to a more inconspicuous bottle; one you had so discreetly and so tactfully hid behind all the vitamins and supplements in the cupboard.

levi contemplates smashing the glassware onto the ground in that moment, oh how satisfying it would be to see the colorless capsules splay out on the floor. but he doesn’t, because levi is nothing if not restrained. and in spite of his overwhelming rage, the wrath he is definitely going to take out on and subject you to once you return home, he finds himself feeling more… disappointed. levi disregards it as an underlying feeling of distaste to the predictable anger one would feel in such a situation, but truthfully, he’s hurt. betrayed even, surely the two of you had built enough trust by now?

after marriage, you had stopped fighting him— for the most part; the locks on your windows and doors had become far too easy to unlock, tensile with time, it was like you were practically inviting him inside! not to mention how you would be so kind as to leave portions of your meal for him whence you had left for work, and not because you didn’t have the time in your schedule to clean your plates and throw away your leftovers. and of course, perhaps the sweetest gesture of all was when you expressed your vulnerability to him, in the dead of night when no one was awake, not even yourself. had you clearly not accepted him at that point?

your good behavior earned you the privilege of levi not doing mandatory searches through your belongings anymore (with and without your knowledge, depending on your marital status). he broke you down real good, to the extent anyone could take a fleeting glance at you two and ascertain you were the perfect couple. but lying was one thing (although you weren’t necessarily lying, seeing that you’d never brought the topic to light in the first place), but secrets were another; and levi would not have those.

and so, he had benevolently set the transparent bottle back in its rightful place. levi had even take the time to precariously pose the little thing behind all of the other plastic bottles. he ultimately decided that he would dispose and deal with the pills later, something needed to come first.

“honey, i’m home!” your tone fell flat of endearing as you blocked the entryway to your beloved abode. with one hand on the wall to support your weight, and the other clutching onto the slim heel of your work appropriate pumps, you pry the shoe from your foot, and it is beyond relieving to be off the heels. it doesn’t take long for levi to make an appearance, and he’s on you in an instant, “welcome home.”

he places both of his hands on your shoulders, leading you inside. but stands still as a statue once you’re barely inside, forcing you to press against his body and lean into him to avoid getting caught by the door that you now notice he closed a little too aggressively. but you hardly have time to dwell on it when he’s touching you. he’s always touching you, his hands drop from your shoulders to your midriff, discarding your blazer, while his fingertips test the buttons on your blouse.

instinctively, you grab his wrist, but there is no feeling of pressure or tight hold, your touch is featherlight in comparison to his, “levi, i can take off my own clothes myself.” you call his name sternly, but when you meet his gaze, all the toughness in your demand is lost. and he doesn’t let go immediately, as if he wants to say something, you can tell by the way his lips press into a frown, but levi never does say anything at all. you fret you may have pushed him a bit too far this time.

“please, i’ll get undressed and we can have dinner together.” you almost desperately plead, and you hope he doesn’t hear the groveling plea to your voice. but knowing levi, he certainly does, “no.” he refuses to elaborate further, at least for an eerie ten second silence. your hand is still on his wrist, which has made no effort to halt the mission that was undoing the buttons of your shirt. and when you give him a disquieted, empty stare, he coughs with a troublesome quirk to his brow.

“i’ve started drawing a bath. i figured you may want one.” levi seems all but annoyed to have to explain himself for his erratic and explicitly uncanny behavior. speechless, or rather, uncertain of what levi wants your response to be, you slowly nod your head.

shuffling out of his grasp and towards your shared bedroom, you swiftly shut the door behind you, barely catching a glimpse of levi through the sliver before it closed; and he continued to watch you like a hawk with that unsettling glare. you don’t know why, but it makes your heart beat faster. but not because you are flustered, or because levi has done anything in particular to provoke any bashfulness from you; but because you are disturbed. you pay no heed to locking the door, seeing that all you’re doing is shedding your work clothes and changing into a bathrobe. but it still feels like levi’s eyes are on you, even if you reason that he isn’t, which you are not one hundred percent confident in your own judgment; but the sound of the washroom’s door moving, followed by footsteps, tells you all you need to know.

reluctantly, once you have donned the new and more suitable homely attire, you approach the bathroom where you see levi’s silhouette. the lightning is dim, a pleasant contrast to the sterile white walls, and the atmosphere may have subdued your nerves had it not been for the fact levi was menacingly leaning on the sink with his arms folded over his chest. he presented himself in the way he would if he were going to reprimand you for something, and it scares you that you don’t know exactly what it is.

levi impatiently outstretched his hands to your waist, taking a hold of the tie belt and pulling you towards him with it alone. you inconspicuously free yourself from his clutches, backing up until you’re adjacent to the tub’s edge, and kneeling before it. he doesn’t comment about how you’ve been avoiding his company, opting to fixate your attention on the more dull matters, such as you are now, running a tentative hand through the water to test its temperature. and it’s strange, the entire ordeal; levi is not the type to draw you baths, and when he does, he does not leave them empty with just water, he has always been overattentive, and to see no fragrances or salts in the water is becoming increasingly more concerning. you tell yourself to focus on the sound of the water, as the tub continues to fill at a steady pace, you listen to the water flow to recollect yourself.

but you were right to be paranoid all along. and levi may believe he is always right about you, but with how long you’ve spent under his watch, you find that your gut feeling is always right when it comes to him.

levi is on you in an instant, using one hand to further lift you over the ledge of the tub, and his other to seize the nape of your neck and plunge your head below the surface of the water. your eyes sting from being fully open, and you inhale a dangerous amount of water from being caught so off guard. your hands find purchase on the edge of the tub, and you push with as much strength as you can muster to hoist yourself up. but it does little for you when levi’s standing right behind you, imprisoning your body between his legs as he looms over your kneeling figure to hold your head beneath the water. he’s saying something, you hear him speaking, droning on with a passive, and sinisterly dissociative pitch to his voice. and it’s something about birth control pills, because he shouts it loud and clear, even for your clogged ears and scattered brain.

but you want to live, more than anything. so you fervently struggle against the pressure around your neck, strenuously thrashing around before you have the time to lose consciousness. the taste of the water is a horrifying afterthought when you unintentionally drink up more in your endeavor to get your head above the water. fortunately or unfortunately for you, in your current circumstances you cannot see levi, but your animalistic fight to survive and the sheer determination to defy him, yet still falling short despite your great efforts has him smiling stupidly for the second time today. and cruelly, he counts. torturously, agonizingly, fifteen tediously drawn out seconds. and when he rings you out, panting and gasping as a disgusting concoction of your saliva and water drain from your esophagus.

you sharply turn around, hacking and coughing the entire way as your arms shakily support your weight before falling onto the damp bathroom rug. with your back colliding painfully against the hard edge of the tub, you slip further onto the ground, neck just barely propped up on the corner of the tub. you rub a consoling hand over your throat, and the throbbing ache won’t go away. every time you suck in a breath of cold air, it stings, and you can feel it all the way down to your trachea. vision impaired, you blink away the film of water that gathered in a glaze over your eyes, but your sight remains blurred.

levi peers down at you with a look of adoration and irritation, and you’re jolted awake, reimmersed back into reality when the sound of the bathroom door lock clicking shut resounds throughout the compact and confined room. you reach out a bleak hand, arms fatigued from your fruitless exertion. and although it is not your intention, levi catches your stray hand in his, stepping forward until he’s hovering over you, overshadowing you entirely, “no, stop it, levi—”

elegantly and effortlessly, he descends onto your figure. your thighs and hips cushion his fall, immobilizing you in place, even as you quick and squirm, it does little to aid you. levi pinches the fabric around the neckline of the robe, fingers trailing down to the tie belt and loosening it with ease, and with every movement you can feel the garment slipping from your body, “if you think a swallowing little water is the only consequence you'll face for betraying my trust, then you’re sorely mistaken.”

#ackerifle #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere attack on titan #yandere aot #yandere aot x reader #yandere levi ackerman #yandere levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman x reader

108 notes · View notes

salaciousdoll · 7 months

Text

꒷︶ ̇ ̟ ෆ ‿︵‿ The Salacious Exploits ‿︵‿ ෆ ̟ ̇ ︶꒷

•┈୨Chapter I୧┈•

•┈୨please be advised to the warning before continuing୧┈•: first part is memory from childhood and high school, second is college au, hyper-feminine!reader, Bimbo/ditzy reader, chubby and black reader in mind, Fem reader, angst, sexual things implied, Strict Levi for a reason, strict Nanami, reader gets into a lot on her first day, false reality of boarding school on purpose, Private College au!, DARK CONTENT, Reader daddy issues is high in this chapter, reader hates her father and some parts of her mother, divorced parents, people around reader doing drugs to ease their pain/ ed in your past, self indulgent, the professors are pervs and so is the reader, taboo, professor Choso getting head but not from a student unlike the mention of Gojo getting head from a student, reader walking in on him, can you all guess who’s your first class teacher is( hint is the next chapter), reader is hyper sexual, masturbation mentioned, Art professor!Choso, Statistics professor!Nanami, Sociology professor!Levi, Maki and Mikasa are friends because I said so, sasha, todo, and Connie are friends( Jean too), Eren is sneaky/ smooth, let me know what I miss. Wc: 7k

ﾟ•┈୨ Song for this Chapter୧┈•ﾟ｡: Boarding School- Lana Del Rey

ෆ ‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿ ෆ ̟ ̇ ┈•ﾟNote from salaciousdoll: I hope you all have fun reading this and just know this is the beginning and it’s only going to get more worst and better at the same time.

Masterlist taglist next chapter

Four years ago, you were in boarding school, the worst boarding school but the richest one in your city. You were with nothing but snotty kids who lived off their friends' applauses and family’s money inheritance. It was fun but traumatizing. You hated your dad for sending you there all because you did, in his words, the unforgivable. It was nothing except just breaking into the Base stadium where concerts, big football and baseball games were held for your city teams. Teams that weren’t that good in your opinion, but you don’t know shit about sports to give an opinion about it.

Boarding school was an experience no teenager should experience unless they can’t function at a public high school or just plain crazy. You hated how you couldn’t wear anything you wanted, hated the ugly and stupid uniform— wanting to puke every time you saw the bad blue-green combo plaid skirt, which was long and that definitely wasn't to your taste. You hated the kids turning their nose and mouths up at you whenever you passed by all because you were rich with a different skin complexion than they had, a combo they acted like is out of this world. You missed your friends, the fun life you had, and the parties they used to throw— now you can’t do any of that. Bummer!

This school was filled with girls who slept with each other boyfriends, boys who prey on their next victim for who knows what, and finally the teachers having affairs with other teachers. Fucking horrible. If you said last year that the dad who loved you before the age of 5 would send you to a school like this— you would laugh. Laugh real hard because you’ll wonder where the hate comes from. Your dad loved you when you were the ages before 5. Then at 17? Now in your 20s? Not so much.

You could guess it started when he started seeing other women in the open relationship your parents decided to have. Ever since that agreement he has acted as if you don’t exist, only gives you money and when he does, it’s through your mother. If you needed cash, she’d hand it to you from his hands. If you need his black card money then he’ll send the money to her card, Cash App, Zelle, PayPal, etc.

The day you saw your father give his love that was supposed to be for you to another woman’s daughter everything cracked around you like the world was made of glass. Everything was made of glass around you and on that day, the glass burst and cracked around you with a domino effect to it— starting with your glass heart. You were 17 seeing your father smile and laugh with another teenage girl. A girl who had different everything to you, you pieced together that this was his ideal daughter. The daughter he always wanted, the graceful daughter, goody two-shoes daughter, the daughter who just looks so much more professional and classy than you. Feeling a warm pool build up in your eyes was enough for you to hate him and her, hell the entire family.

You thought that going over to him and saying his assigned name since your birth would make him realize that he’s done you wrong. Oh how wrong you were, the feeling of betrayal and hurt was around you four as you stared your father in the eyes with a vicious glare— matching his energy. It almost looks like he wanted to kill you because of you calling his name like that. He was with the family he always wanted and yet here you were. A disgrace to his reputation. Madness was lurking over his shoulder as you kept calling him “ dad”. After the tenth “ dad” he snapped— yanking your arm to drag you away. After finally getting away from their ear shot he angrily stated the words of “ What did I do to you and your mother to deserve unhappiness.” He gripped your arm even more harshly through rough, hot tears. “ You two make me sick. She makes me sick.”

Your father dropped your arm like he was touching a garbage truck full of garbage. He looked you in your beady tear-filled eyes. “ You.” The pause after that was long and flowing through the summer breeze. You wanted it to stay long because the next words that utter out of his mouth broke you mentally and emotionally. “ You make me sick. Hate how I’ve grown to hate my own daughter, my only daughter but you caused this. Your mother caused this. I’m not happy.” The repetition of the last sentence through his broken voice was enough for you to walk away from the crying man-child of a father you once knew. You remember walking past the same teenager with her mother laughing and smiling as they showed each other videos on their phones. Shit! the longer you look the more you see what he’s talking about. Because they’re happy and healthy, they make him feel happy and healthy as well.

That moment was the moment you started to get into more trouble. Throwing parties on boarding school campuses, watching the girls and boys do drugs with a spoon and lighter to stop their food cravings knowing full and well their anger for themselves were going to eventually come back on you since they didn’t want to be “huge like you”, watching student and teachers do coke lines to past by time of torture, watching the senior boys chase after the younger classes, you were included multiple times— turned down every last one of them with a quickness. You wanted your teacher. Too bad he left before you tried to seduce him. Afterwards, You started watching the teachers fuck in the spots they never knew you knew of— enjoying it a little too much as your hand traveled south as you watched. You wanted attention to thrive off, so you made a value to yourself on becoming the popular girl of your city boarding school. Man did you have the time of your life there— in misery and gold.

You thought that going to a 4- year public university was great for you. It was, for the first two years. You were glad that you could start over there because nobody knew of the boarding school you mentioned when they asked about your old life. A clean slate was good for you especially in a college as big as this one. The classes were more big and diverse than any school you went to. You were so glad that you picked this Marley tech university because you got more friends with different ethnic backgrounds and the same ethnic backgrounds as you. You didn’t stick out like a pretty pink thumb, you fit more in where you were. Taking classes with all of your friends and getting into the fashion designing major you promised yourself to take when you were in high school was everything you wanted.

It was suddenly swept away from you like a tablecloth with dishes stacked on top of it accompanied by the angry couple arguing about who’s in the wrong. Your mother was to blame. She wanted you close to her because you're the last person she had as family since your dad divorced her and completely cut her off for the same woman you saw with the girl that brought your father happiness. After he did that, you cut off anything concerning him— using your mother’s money and sugar daddies you met online or out with friends to get you by in school. You hated working for yourself because doing anything that chipped your nails was annoying and honestly jobs are overrated, you wished that the world was free.

You didn’t even know how your father was living and honestly you hoped he perished alone and alone only. He hurt you but hurt your mother even worse. She now had stress building up and the fear of abandonment is heightened more than ever so that’s why you had no choice but to agree with her sending you to the Private college near her so she feels more comfortable. No worrying, no stress but what about your happiness? Are you ever going to get that? Happiness shouldn’t be hard to achieve and sadness shouldn’t be easy to achieve either.

You thought back to your childhood and recent decisions— soon feeling your eyes get glossy. You hurried and fanned yourself to stop the tears running down your face in your pink hello kitty mirror you held in your hands. Muttering to yourself as you close your hand mirror with a snap, “ Can’t afford to look like a Billie Elilish single on my first day at this rich ass private school.” Your driver gave you a nod in the mirror when you locked eyes with him, “ You look amazing, little l/n. Have an amazing first day back and at a new school. Do you want me to pick you up or bring your car to park it in the parking lot, ready for you after classes?” You were so glad for Timothy, your father's maid/ business partner. He always looked after you like your father should have. You were forever grateful for this kind man.

You rubbed your glossy lips together, releasing them with a satisfying pop, “ Just bring my car, Tim. I will try to have a good day today and tell my mother to take an ibuprofen for her headache. She was worrying too much about my first day of school and boom, a headache.”

Tim smiled at you and nodded his head to your task you assigned him to do. He watched you get out of the car and stare at the school in front of you. The school wasn’t big, it just looked old money looking. What a bummer! As you walked past the entrance gate with your light-pink Medusa Versace heels and pretty white leg warmers covering the top straps of your heels. Your outfit was fall ready just in pink. The more you walked in, the more you wanted to turn back to your freedom, your happiness, your peace, meaning wanting to go back to your other college. This was even worse than boarding and public school because nobody dressed like you. They all were dark and neutral colors like ewww, “ don’t they have a sense of fashion anywhere here?” You hadn’t realized you muttered that out loud until you heard a gasp next to you.

Locking eyes with brown eyes startled you as you dropped some of your books on the ground. The person laughed and held up a hand to stop you from picking up your books, “ I got it, didn’t know you were clumsy.” When he got up you just now noticed his pink hair sprouting out on top of his head, “ I’m Yuji itad-”. A voice interrupted his introduction, a bone crushing interruption really, you came to that conclusion from the side hug the white haired man gave him , “ Itadori, you know you’re not supposed to be on this side of the campus.” His deep voice has a sing-song tone to it as he stared at the side of the boy’s face with black shades on his head and a pencil behind his ear. “ I should write you up, but I don’t feel like following the rules just now, keep this between us. I, also, know Fushiguro is here to get the house keys from his lousy father, so it’s best you go now. Feeling generous enough to let you go. I’ll even pretend you weren’t here and let you leave in 10..9..8”

Once he stopped counting you realized that this must be a rule at this college for underclassmen to not be on the same campus as the upperclassmen and you also realized that the boy named Itadori didn’t let him get to 7 before speeding off to walk to a spiky dark-haired boy who was walking ahead ignoring the two conversation just a minute ago. You were about to walk until he spoke again, “ You must be the new student, { reader}, what a beau- beautiful view here at this school. You would enjoy the views from classrooms. My name is professor Gojo, it’s gonna be an interesting year for you so hope you make the best of it… I’ll take you to the head of the school’s office to let you get situated. You should’ve enrolled in your classes over this summer, so all you need to do is to get your books you need and all that other school stuff you kids need now- a- days.”

You tilted your head at what he was trying to say in his first sentence and raised an eyebrow at his explanation and from what you see and hear as a first impression— he seems laid back, the laid back teacher or coach you always fall head first for so you’re gonna stay away from him and pray you don’t have a class with him.

The entire walk to the principal office was annoying and nerve wrecking. Nerve wracking because he was so tall, handsome, and down to earth. Granted you weren’t short but damn he had to be about 6’6 or something. Then he’s talking to all the students and teachers you both passed by, the same students and teachers watched you two walk past with curious eyes wondering who’s the new girl with their favorite coach. The key reason they knew you were new is because this is a private school where everyone knew everyone’s face even the teachers knew who everyone was by name and face. They had two campuses though, one for underclassmen and one for the upperclassmen, that’s all you paid attention to as you now stood in front of a black wooden door with a big glass to let you see inside of the organized office.

You were genuinely confused that they even had a head office at this school because that’s not normal in public colleges, you barely even saw the head of the school, so this is another thing that’s different. Coach Gojo knocked on the door before placing his large veined hand on the door from behind your frame since he was standing behind you, you didn’t realize he was this close since you were inside of La La land in your head, so in response, goosebumps formed on your skin and you tried to be subliminal with your shiver, but he noticed and almost wanted to let out a low chuckle. The head of the school answered the door with a low, “ Satoru, what now? A kid walked out of your lesson again because of the jo-” he stopped his sentence once he saw your pretty eyes staring at him in curiosity of what he was about to say. There was a story behind your eyes and he could tell off first glance in them.

He then looked back at Gojo, who was now wearing a smug smirk on his face because he knew Yaga was captured by your unique aura. He was going to figure you out in a week like he always does his student. On the other hand, Gojo was now standing on the side of you— his eyes didn’t mean to travel down, but the pink off-shoulder knitted cardigan was outlining your chest perfectly and your thighs were perfect with that skirt you had on. He cleared his throat with a hand swiping over his face because he shouldn’t be looking at another student like that when he already had one in his coaching office, just previously giving him head before she had to go to his psychology class. This college was great for academics but fucked up for morals, you’ll soon find out.

“ Yes please wait here and I’ll give you the things you need while I show you around the school. I got it from here Satoru.”, Yaga says, still not taking his eyes off you but you didn’t know it. He had on dark ass sunglasses so who would see how much he’s staring at you.

Gojo clicked his tongue and held up his finger, “ You can’t because Yeager is on his way to give her the school tour after their first class together.” Yaga wanted to strangle him from his facial expression alone because he truly wanted to know why he was so smug right now. Yaga nodded before allowing you to pass through by stepping aside, “ Come in and I’ll speak with you about the rules and such before he gets here.” You were definitely in for a long time here because the rules were long and boring. This was not at all like a public university because you could do anything just don’t let the RA catch you. Here at Kaizen Maria, you could be caught with a snap of a finger because it’s a small school and not too many people disobey the rules oddly enough. You tried to follow along after he mentioned no parties on campus, but it’s like once you heard that you zoned out because what the hell can you do now.

The Head of the school cleared his throat, “ Repeat the last thi-” you were so glad he was interrupted by a loud knock. He answered it with a come in and a tall brunette with long brown hair in the middle part and emerald-jade eyes walked in. The muscles in his arms stuck out to you so much because all he did was reach to close the door behind himself. He had a lean body and boy was he eye candy but not what you needed, just what you wanted. “ Sir. I was sent here by Mr. Ackerman to guide her to his class.”

Yaga sighed and motioned to you sitting there with your arms holding onto your pink notebooks and binder tightly with one pink led pencil and pen with pink furry ball in your hand, “ We’re all down here so if you will kindly get her to his class on time, she already missed her first class by being here with me.” Eren eyed you with something you could not place or far too dumb to place.

He held out his hand and you thought it was for your hand, so you latched your hand on top of his. He chuckled prior to shaking his head no, “ Your books, let me carry them for you while I guide you through the school on the way to class.” You let out a small laugh whilst handing him your books, “ I apologize then. Lead the way—”

He could tell you were trying to figure out what his name was from the way your eyes squinted, “ Eren. Just call me Eren.” You nodded as you two ventured out the building, walking to the building across from it. Sociology in the morning should be a sin, yet you’ll digress.

You two walked in silence until he spoke up, “ how do you like it here so far and you are really beautiful and your outfit is very cute but you’re a bit overdressed.” He ended his sentence with a light chuckle. You smiled at him, “ Didn’t even know everyone dressed so damn boring but thank you, Eren.” As you two continued to walk, you looked around to see bulletin boards filled with tryouts for sports or clubs. Looked around to see some students still walking to class. Not noticing how wide Eren eyes got after writing something with your pen. You didn’t see him do it because you were too busy looking around.

His mouth opened and closed because he was so surprised to hear you insult him and everyone else at the school; at the same time it was funny to him because you’re right. “ I wouldn’t say that in front of everyone else if I was you, wouldn’t want to piss off people on your first day, wouldn’t ya’?” You nodded your head and pointed your pink manicured finger at him in a “ You’re right” way as you two made it to the little classroom your sociology class was at. You watched Eren open up the door for you to walk in and when you did you were surprised to see that the class already started causing your anxiety to spike through the building.

“ Glad to see you finally made it, Yeager and- who are you?”, A deep voice says on your side. Once your head turned, you lowered your eyes to a short man standing near the podium. He had a short cut parted in the middle, clear subscription glasses on his head, and a black tailored suit with the suit jacket long gone— now he was in a white button up shirt that hugged his medium size chest. Your eyes traveled up and down his body without knowing that he was waiting on you to answer his question. He’s gonna have fun disciplining you.

“ Hey! I asked you a question, so I expect an answer. Who are you?”, the man repeated with anger in his voice. You jumped and cleared your voice, “ My name is y/n l/n, professor—” You looked down at your paper where his name was and looked back at him with a big smile on your face, “ Ackerman.” Levi stared at you longer than he planned because of the way your tits bounced when you rocked your body back and forth due to anxiety creeping up your back the longer the silence and stares got.

Levi pointed to the seat in the middle of two pretty girls, “ Sit there and be quiet, you interrupt you’re staying after for 10 minutes and I don’t give a damn about how late you are to whatever you do after class. Understood brat?.” You frowned while nodding your head at that because is that even allowed? What if you have something urgent to get to? I guess he just said fuck your plans. You then turned to walk your way to your seat with eyes watching you all over. Once you got to the row the two women were at, you whispered a low “excuse me” as you squeezed past the one with green eyes and short hair in a pixie cut.

When you finally sat down you noticed that both of them had their hair in a pixie cut hairstyle, just one with gray eyes and one with green eyes and glasses around her eyes. Both looked at you as you sat your pink water bottle covered in strawberry shortcake or hello kitty stickers sitting next to your pink notebooks and pens.

Mikasa stared at the side of your head as your eyes focused on Levi teaching the class about racial injustices and other things concerning sociology. You paid attention to the way he spoke with his clean little hands and the way he gutted into someone who’s not paying attention. Maki tapped your shoulder, “ Hey, I’m Maki, that one on the other side is Mikasa, she doesn’t talk much because she’s too afraid of professor Ackerman.”

You raised your eyebrow and turned to look at Mikasa who had a resting bitch face. You were about to speak to her but she spoke before you, “ Don’t listen to her if you know what’s good for you. Nobody is scared of the tiny elf of a man, if anything I want to step on him for assigning this much work for us.” You giggled and in reality of that it made them smile and caused the lecturing to stop, “ Let’s hear the joke, you three. Make us all laugh since you shitheads decided to interrupt my lecture…”

You three looked at each other prior to looking back at him, you spoke up instead, “ Sir, we weren’t laughing, just introducing ourselves that’s all. So sorry for the interruption, please don’t let us stay after for 10 minutes.” Levi scoffed, “ Did I say I was going to make you all stay, just for that, you’ll be the only one staying. Now interrupt my lesson again and I’ll make sure you all are banned from my class the rest of the week.” The gasp that left your mouth was loud and you thought that Levi was about to fault you for that, but he stated back teaching again.

You sat back in your seat with your arms crossed the entire lesson. You hated this class and wanted out. Didn’t have any motivation to pay attention because of his words. You were supposed to write stuff down— and you didn’t because you were highly upset. Once you have an attitude you didn’t have the energy to pull through anything. You hated that feeling and it was all because of that short old man.

Once class finished, students listened to what he had to say and you didn’t. “ read and annotate the syllabus carefully, I will be quizzing you all on that particular syllabus. Friendly reminder to read and annotate your sociology text book you were supposed to buy before stepping foot in my class. If you don’t have one, then I suggest you get one because I will be asking questions on that as well. Class is dismissed. Go be shitheads somewhere else.” Levi then stared at you staring off into space, he turned before a small smirk was plastered on his face, “ {reader}, get down here and explain why you were interrupting my class.”

You almost wanted to stomp your heels, almost. In reality, you quietly gathered your stuff and seen two sticky notes on your binder. One with notes and one with names/phone numbers from Maki and Mikasa. You will have to thank them after class, this was so nice of them. As you made your way to him another teacher into the door, two actually. One with square glasses and a bright smile on their face and one with hair covering his eyes and a goatee that suited his face. “ Leviiiiiii, guess what?”, The person with the glasses yelled out as they strolled to his desk.

He didn’t even flinch at how loud they were because his eyes stayed on you the entire time and because he’s used to them. You, however, was someone could see right through and needed to know more about you. He’s seen your last name somewhere but where. He didn’t even notice that four eyes and beanpole stopped talking to him and watched you along side of him walk down the stairs carefully.

Hange hurried to you and held out their hands, “ Hello, you must be the new kid we were alerted about, it’s nice to meet you, I’m professor Zoe, your biology professor and this hunk over here is Professor Zacharias, the anthropology professor.” She held your hand like it was the most precious thing in the world, caressing the top of your hand as she held it. Strange behavior for a professor but you’re willing to push past it because they were fine as hell. Three fine people and they were your superiors, oh how you will love it here.

Miche had his eyes trained on you and so did Levi. Miche was taken back by your beauty, so when he grunted with a nod of his head when Hange introduce him, he couldn’t find the words so that was the last option. You were on cloud nine when you heard the gruffness of his grunt. You needed to pull it out of him when you are riding him.

Levi hit his hand on the table disrupting you staring back and forth between Hange and Miche, “ Hey! You didn’t explain and I don’t like waiting, so tell me what I want to know.” You huffed and held onto your books even tighter to your chest, ultimately pulling your boobs up even more causing Miche to turn and fix his pants, Levi was so glad that he wasn’t easily turned on like Miche and Erwin, who’s not here because of his class going on right now.

“ I didn’t even interrupt the class, I just wanted to clarify that we weren’t laughing because of your lecture, we were laughing because of our names and the way we introduced each other.”, You say while taking out a pink lollipop and putting it in your mouth. Could you be anymore seductive? Fuck. Levi scoffed and rounded the corner to sit on the edge of his desk with a come here motion of his finger. You were confused as you came near until he snatched your sucker out your mouth— your saliva detaching from your mouth and the sucker. Following after that, he grabbed a napkin and placed the sucker on the napkin, “ No eating in my class, second rule in the syllabus. Reasons why you and the rest of your class of heathens need to read them carefully. If I catch you eating in my class again, you’re banned for two weeks— only learning virtually. Do I make myself clear?”

You wanted to cry because why is he so uptight and how will you deal with the fact that you lost your last strawberry kiwi sucker, “ Yes sir. I understand.” Your eyes watered causing him to curse under his breathe. You hated how sensitive you were and your dad was to blame. You hated when men yelled at or scold you and anyone for that matter because you’re not yelling at them, so why are they yelling at you.

He was about to speak when you’re 10 minute alarm went off. You hurried and turned it off, “ Set it for ten minutes so that means I have to get to my next class in five minutes so please let me leave Mr.Ackerman.” He waved his hand as a dismissing motion and you hurried and walked past miche getting a swift of his cologne, your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you took in his smell.

As you finally got out the door, they all looked at your sucker before Levi picked it up and gave it to Miche. Hange gasp, “ Him?!! Out of us two, him?!” Levi ignored her and turned his back to them to erase his writings on the board whilst Miche was smirking with your sucker in his mouth. Truth be told, your taste along with the taste of the sucker was everything to him. He’s going to talk to Erwin and Nile about this. On the other hand, levi wanted the sucker for himself, but he saw how miche and Hange was eyeing it. He was originally gonna give it to Hange— only if they would’ve never interrupted his time with you then he wouldn’t have given it to Miche.

You, on the other hand, was rushing to your next class passing by catcalls and shouts, you paid no attention until you were in the building, climbing up the stairs to your next class, statistics 116. You didn’t even pay attention to where you was walking and bump into a muscular back. Shaking your head to get rid of your dizziness creeping up your body to your head, you heard a voice talking to you.

“ Are you alright, bumped into me pretty hard. Surprise you didn’t fall.”, The deep voice said as he handed you your pencil that fell. You looked up and caught the eyes of sea blue and you were so mesmerized by them. He had blonde hair covering his forehead and a pretty smile on his face as he eyed you.

You cleared your throat and smiled at him, “ Yes, so sorry about that, I’m such a Clutz.” You blinked your eyelashes and smirked at him. You watched in satisfaction as his face grew red as the blood in your body. He could’ve been easy, but you didn’t like boys your age. So when your hand touched his as he gave your pen back, you held eye contact with him until it was interrupted by people making kissing noises.

You turned to the sound to see two people hugging themselves and making kissing noises with one guy standing there with a smirk on his faceand his arms crossed. One was a girl with brown hair, one with a gray buzz cut, and the other one with a tied up ponytail and a beauty mark on his eye enhancing his prettiness.

Armin was like a turtle to you, cute and shy. He waved his arms around and told them to stop in a whiny voice and it made you giggle because in your mind he was the perfect sub if you were a Dom. After some more taunting, the buff guy in a black tee introduced himself, “ I’m Aoi Todo, but you can call me whatever you want.” He grabbed your hand and brought it to his lips, planting a supple kiss on your soft hand. You smiled and introduced yourself to all of them. The other two named Sasha and Connie were a funny duo to be around. They loved cracking jokes, one of them even said you reminded them of a Sanrio character and they were gonna call you that from now on. You didn’t mind, it just means new friends.

You looked at the time as they all talked amongst each other and let out a gasp, “ I’m late. Real late.” Saying bye to them and walking two doors down was something out of a comedy movie especially when they followed you— whispering amount each other as they watched you walk. You were about to touch the door when your hand got a tiny slap on it from Todo. You raised your eyebrow before seeing him open up the door for you to walk in and as you did, you blew him a kiss— catching it with his hand over his heart with a red hue coloring across his nose was his response to your actions.

Nanami stopped teaching and looked at the group of people who walked in, “ You’re late. I somehow expected this from those three but you, Armin, I’m disappointed but glad you can make it. Please take a seat.” It’s like you wasn’t there for a second when he was scolding everyone else. When he looked over at you, he paused and caught himself by clearing his throat, “ And you must be the new student, { reader}, it’s a pleasure to have you but I must warn you about being late to my class. Take this syllabus and have a seat.” He pointed to the first row chair that was positioned in front of his desk.

His deep voice was going straight to your pussy and you couldn’t help it especially the way his cuffs on his shirt was rolled and the way his glasses sat on his face and the veins lacing his arms. Once you got closer to him to take the syllabus, you got hit with a whiff of his cologne and whisky type scent— your eyes closed in bliss prior to taking it out his hands and sitting down away from Armin and everyone else that you just met.

You wondered how the teachers knew their names and their personalities already if it’s the first day of school. It was weird because normally professors have a hard time remembering names, you’ll have to ask Armin or Eren after this, if you see them.

All throughout class the guy and girl sitting next to you was trying hard to focus on what professor Nanami was talking about, but they couldn’t stop sharing glances with each other, ultimately speaking with their eyes. Reiner was way louder with his thoughts then Annie was. Annie stared at the side of your head until you looked over at her and smiled. She thought your smile was beautiful and unique because not too many people around her even smile or smile at her period. It was throwing her in a loop, meanwhile Reiner was trying to get your attention by putting his arm on the back of your chair.

You would’ve noticed the gesture if you weren’t paying attention to your teacher explaining the difference to proportions with anticipating patterns. You barely managed to understand anything he was saying because the way that he looked back at the students whenever he wrote anything on the board was everything to you. His eyes were so beautiful to you— only could tell because his glasses were off his eyes and placed on his desk, giving you full access to his eyes whenever he turned and asked a question to students he thought weren't watching or listening. You had a small fear that he would be the teacher to pick on you and a part of you wouldn’t mind. Just don’t yell.

The way his hair giggled in the nonexistent wind as he wrote on the green board was beautiful to you. The golden hair that parted in the middle and the cheekbones pulled you in completely. He was a beauty and you needed him. He was magnetic in a way, you couldn’t stop staring at him and him only. He pulled you in and he may be the first crush at this school for you.

You were too caught up in your ditzy thoughts that you didn’t hear him dismiss the class. You were surprised at how long you were daydreaming and he didn’t notice. You thought you were Scott-free because you didn’t get called on or caught so you gathered your things and made your way past his desk he was sitting at. The way your last name rolled off his tongue shocked and aroused you. His voice was so deep and soothing, “ Miss {reader’s last name}, I can’t help you pass this class if you’re not focusing on the lessons. I know you’re new here so I’m gonna give you a pass, please don’t let it happen again.”

You took a deep gulp of your saliva and nodded your head, “ I understand sir, please forgive me.” He nodded his head and picked up a stack of paper with a sticky note on top of it. “ Please take this to Mr. Kamo. Tell him it’s very important from Mr.Gojo.” The grunt sigh he let out at professor Gojo's name was comical to you because you sense that he’s either annoyed by him or just doesn't like him. You had a feeling it was the first one especially from the way he pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand.

You slowly took the paper out of his hand and then bid him goodbye with a big smile on your face. Your big cheeks was heating up at the thought of his hand brushing against yours, sadly it didn’t— this time. You had no idea who Mr.Kamo was, so you asked around until a timid guy with black hair sprouting along his forehead gave you the directions and building he was in. Even gave you the room number too. After that encounter, you heard that his name was Yuta from his classmate calling him.

The walk to the art lecture hall was long because it was a block away. During that walk, you had your headphones in listening to your alternative playlist and you were loving the breeze on your face as you walked in your heels proudly. Your eyes wandered around you and you spotted a man in a suit with his hair in a half up and half down style— long hair flowing and a bun on his head. He was a gorgeous man walking out of the gym with a bag in his hand. His eyes were looking down to his phone and when he looked up they locked in on you immediately. You realized that he was staring right at you when you were walking past him. He couldn’t be a student, so he was a teacher but what teacher? If you didn’t have that class now in the fall, you’ll have it in the spring.

You thought if you locked eyes with him even longer than you did, you'd have to jump his bones, so when you passed him you averted your eyes to the building next to the gym about two spaces down. That was the building you had to go to and man was it big. You walked to the front door and were about to open it when a teacher- no security guard opened the door for you with a tight lip smirk on his face, “ Welcome, sweetheart.” His voice was fucking deep and soft at the same time, you didn’t even know that was possible but for the scar lip man, it was. You smiled at him and said thank you before walking off with your head filled with the scent of his cologne. He was a beautiful man with green eyes and black hair that dropped down his eyes— buff too. Strong enough to pick you up, so you are definitely counting on seeing him again.

When you finally got to the floor, you walked to the room number and softly knocked on the door. After a few seconds, there was no answer. You were about to leave it on the floor, but you decided to twist the knob instead and leave it on the desk. As soon as you opened the door, you heard soft moans and dick sucking noises from the back of the classroom. You hope they didn’t notice you, but he noticed you as soon as you opened the door. His low and hungry eyes were placed on you as the woman he told to come to his class was giving him head.

You tried so desperately to not get wet at the sounds of his low moans and whines she pulled from him when her mouth was working his cock like it was her last and final drink. The slurping got louder as you walked to the desk with your one headphone piece in and the other one out. You were so glad they could possibly see the right headphone piece in your ear, would save you more from embarrassment. You set the papers on the desk in the dark room with only the projector still on and made your way out the door until you heard a deep voice say thank you. You stopped and turned to him like a dumbass knowing what he was doing.

Your voice came out calm and collected, “ You’re very welcome, sir. Have a nice day.” You smiled prior to power walking out of the classroom and building. You didn’t know who he was getting head from and you should’ve had a different reaction but this school looked fishy as soon as you stepped on the lawn and plus the false advertisement the website has is enough to make anyone turn it down but you and your mother were too dumb and naive to realize, your mother just wanted you near her. Though you couldn’t see Mr.Kamo face properly, yet you knew he was fine just from his moans and voice. On your way to your car to go home, you noticed a small sticker with a phone number on it and Eren’s name on top of it. You were surprised to see it because when the hell did he have time to do this. You most likely wasn’t paying attention when he did it because you were too busy looking around the school when you two walked to your first, well second class today. You did not like calling men first but you’ll excuse this because you had a feeling you were going to love that call. Just like you are going to love this school.

Tagging: @chosoist @happygoluckyalexis @mastermindenoshimaalicia @emomanswhore @neesieiumz @simpingfor-wakasa @nutheadgeenat @honeybleed @angelshub

743 notes · View notes