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yelena-bellova · 3 years

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Safe Haven: tfatws!Bucky Barnes x fem!reader - Chapter Two

chapter one -Chapter Two: According To Plan - chapter three

Series Masterlist

Plot: Y/n and Sam leave for Munich, gaining the surprise addition of Bucky Barnes to their team.

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x fem!reader, Sam Wilson x platonic!reader

Warnings: spoilers for ep.2, language, violence, squint for fluff in between all the chaos, Y/n and Bucky ain’t feeling each other yet, protective big brother Sam, nobody likes Walker

Word Count: 7.5k (ya’ll, we had to split episode 2 into two chapters because I use too many words lol)

A/N: OKAY, thank you to everybody for supporting the first chapter. I didn’t really think anything would come of it but I was clearly wrong. Hopefully you enjoy this one just as much, each episode will probably be divided into two chapters if the rest of the season continues on like it is.

----

The government hadn’t just failed Sam, they were rubbing his face in the fact that they thought their knockoff Captain America was a better candidate than him.

I followed my brother down the halls of the New Orleans air force base, trying to ignore the paraphernalia that hung on the walls. John Walker was everywhere you looked; the internet, televisions, posters were plastered all over the city announcing his new appointment. Each time I had to read the words ‘Cap Is Back’ I became a little sick to my stomach. Sam stopped in front of me once we’d reached the hanger to stare at one of the posters. Though he tried to keep his face neutral, the sadness bled through in his eyes.

“Seems like a good guy. You met him?” a man who I assumed was Sam’s military contact asked.

“No,” Sam answered before changing the topic, “Thanks for doing this on such short notice.” “Yeah, no sweat. I’m just finishing up the checklist, you two’ll be all good to go once you land in Munich,” he looked to me and reached a hand for me to shake, “Joaquin Torres.” “Y/n Y/l/n. Thanks for not making any noise about me coming along for the ride.”

“Hey, I trust an Avenger’s judgement on who to bring to a fight,” he smiled, stopping at the top of the steps to allow me to go before himself.

I elbowed Sam as we descended the stairs side by side, “Hear that? You’ve got good judge- why’re you making that face?” Before he could answer, a foreign voice announced its presence. “Shouldn’t have given up the shield.”

My eyes fell to the floor below us and climbed the looming figure waiting at the end of the staircase. I didn’t need to have any history lessons on who he was or why he’d come to talk to Sam about such a subject. James Bucky Barnes, the second 100+ year old man to walk the earth without a single wrinkle. The tragic tale of HYDRA’s bloodthirsty history. The man Sam had fought to protect and been sent to prison for.

“Good to see you too, Buck,” Sam passively greeted the man, swerving around his body to continue on our path to the jet. The hint wasn’t taken.

“This is wrong.”

“Hey, hey, look, I’m working, alright? So all this outrage is gonna have to wait.” Bucky fell into step on the other side of Sam, pointing towards yet another poster of John Walker, “You didn’t know that was gonna happen?”

“No, of course I didn’t know that was gonna happen,” Sam’s tone became more emotional, “You think it didn’t break my heart to see them march him out there and call him the new Captain America?” “This isn’t what Steve wanted,” Bucky pushed. Sam was growing tired of the questioning, “What do you want me to do? Call America and tell ‘em I changed my mind? Huh? Yeah, right. It’s a great reunion, buddy, be well.” “You had no right to give up that shield, Sam.” I could no longer stay silent and let him try and make a good man feel guilty. “Okay, you’re out of line with that one, Barnes.” Bucky finally took a second to register my being there before looking back to Sam, “Who the hell is this?” “She’s none of your concern, but let me tell you what you’re not gonna do,” Sam stood in front of Bucky, “You’re not gonna come here in your overextended life and tell me about my rights. It’s over, Bucky. Besides, I have bigger things to deal with now.” Emotions I couldn’t fully understand took over Bucky’s face, “What could be bigger than this?”

Sam fished his phone out of his back pocket and held it up to the Super Soldier, “This guy. His connections with rebel organizations all over Eastern and Central Europe and he’s strong. Too strong.” “And?” Bucky asked, unimpressed.

“Well, he’s been connected to this online group called the Flag Smashers. Now, Redwing traced them to a building somewhere outside of Munich so that’s where I’m going,” Sam turned to me to signal we were walking again.

“Well, I don’t trust Redwing,” Bucky continued his pursuit, “Hold on a minute.” “You don’t have to trust Redwing,” Sam said firmly as we paused again, “But I’mma go see if he’s right. ‘Cause I have a feeling they might be a part of the Big Three.”

Bucky’s eyebrows lowered in confusion, “What ‘Big Three?’”

“The Big Three.”

“What Big Three?” “Androids, aliens and wizards,” I answered before Sam could. “That’s not a thing,” Bucky shook his head. “That’s definitely a thing,” Sam nodded. “No, it’s not.” “It really is,” I set my bag down on the ground and crossed my arms, there was no indication we’d be leaving any time soon.

“Every time we fight, we fight one of the three,” Sam insisted.

“So who are you fighting now, Gandalf?”

Sam inhaled to continue arguing before snapping his head back in surprise, “How do you know about Gandalf?” “I read The Hobbit,” Bucky answered confidently, “In 1937 when it first came out.”

“So you see my point?” “No, I don’t. There are no wizards.” I pointed to Bucky and tilted my head towards Sam, “Now there, I agree with him.” Sam looked offended that I didn’t automatically back him up, “You both are wrong…Doctor Strange.” “Is a sorcerer,” Bucky finished.

“Aah!” Sam laughed and poked Bucky’s firm chest, “A sorcerer is a wizard without a hat. Think about it, right? I’m right. I just came up with that, it’s crazy.” Bucky’s face read that he was thousand shades of done with Sam’s childish argument, even if he’d fought just as immaturely. I was beginning to see why Sam didn’t recount his brief time spent with the ex-Winter Soldier that fondly but I’d also forgotten how easy it was to push Sam’s buttons sometimes. There was some unwitting dynamic between them that I didn’t want to be in the middle of. “So glad we’re wasting valuable time on arguing over whether or not Harry Potter’s real,” I spoke up, tapping my foot out of impatience.

Sam was the first to snap back to reality, “That’s not the point. These guys aren’t magical, alright? They use brute force just like you, the incredibly annoying guy in front of me with the staring problem,” he reached down to grab my bag and hand it to me, “Let’s move.” “I’m coming with you,” Bucky called, the sound of his combat boots hitting the hanger floor behind us. “No, you’re not,” Sam answered harshly. “Oh my gosh,” I groaned before dropping my duffle bag again on the tarmac and spinning around to face the two men, “I don’t know how you two could have possibly saved the day as much as people say you have if you’re always like this! You,” I pointed to Sam, “Stop trying to do this on your own. You,” I moved my finger towards Bucky, “No more talking about the shield. If anybody needs me,” I wiggled my fingers and let the blue energy lift my bag into the air, “I’ll be waiting in the jet.” ——

Bucky and Sam stood speechless as they watched Y/n march across the tarmac, her bag magically floating behind her. “Who is she?” “My sister, Y/n,” Sam answered, “I didn’t know she could do that till today. She twisted my arm until I agreed to let her come.” Bucky’s eyes hadn’t left Y/n since she took control and ended Sam and his bickering. There weren’t many people who met him for the first time and didn’t give him a second glance. If she was Sam’s sister then she sure as hell knew about his past. Yet here she was daring to order him around and advocate for him to join Sam and her on their mission. It also went without saying that she was gorgeous. But she had proven that she didn’t understand the seriousness in which the situation with the new Captain America needed to be treated with, and that irked him. Still, his feet automatically wanted to carry him to the jet once she’d headed up the ramp and he’d lost his view of her. “Can’t decide whether I like her or not.”

——

Not having a suit to wear, I had changed on the jet from my sweater, capris and sneakers to a black shirt, jeans, booties and my favorite blue leather jacket that matched the blue that flowed from my fingertips.

When I stepped out of the jet’s bathroom, I expected to find Sam and Bucky fighting again. The whole flight so far has been filled with the same tension that had begun in the hanger and we’d been sitting in uncomfortable silence ever since. I was sure that the second I left, they’d be going at it again like children when a parent disappeared. Instead, they were quietly sitting on opposite sides of the jet with their eyes trained on one another.

“Can you guys quiet down for a second?” I sarcastically remarked as I walked across the room, “I can’t hear myself think.”

I deposited my bag in the corner of the jet near where Torres was climbing down the ladder, “One minute to drop off, Sam.”

I expected to turn around and see both Sam and Bucky up and preparing themselves, but the two men were still embroiled in a stare down. Sam and I had always cheesed each other off in a typical sibling fashion, but Bucky and his relationship seemingly consisted of nothing but that.

Sam finally rose from his seat and Bucky quickly did the same, I brushed past him to stand on the other side of Sam. “So what’s the plan?” Sam ignored the question and handed me a small black device, “This is your comm, don’t lose it.” I nodded and placed the small ear piece in my ear, the faint hums of the jet coming through it.

With no direction from Sam, Bucky sat back down unhappily. “Great. So no plan?”

“Thirty seconds,” Torres shouted over the wind coming in from the open hatch.

“Enjoy your ride, Buck,” Sam remarked from beside me. “No, you can’t call me that.” “Why not? That’s what Steve called you.” “Steve knew me longer and Steve,” Bucky tilted his head to Sam, “Had a plan.”

I shook my head to shake off the ridiculousness of arguing nicknames at the moment. “I’m sorry, are we really playing the name game when we’re literally about to jump out of a plane? I get this is my first mission and all but- Bucky’s eyebrows shot up his forehead as he looked to Sam, “This is her first mission? What the hell were you thinking, bringing her?” “She,” I took a step towards Bucky, “Is more than capable of handling herself. First mission or 100th, I know what I’m doing, Barnes.”

“Fifteen seconds to drop!” Torres’ announcement ended any further arguing between me and Bucky.

“Listen to the woman,” Sam smirked as he put on his goggles, probably thinking back to a few hours ago when I’d body slammed him into the roof, “And I have a plan.”

“Really?” Bucky spread his arms out as we watched Sam walk away from us, “What is it?” Sam had already told me that he’d drop in first and I was to follow once he’d cleared the area. Bucky had not been privy to hearing that discussion and Sam had made no effort to fill him in. Without giving Bucky a second look, but winking at me, he dove headfirst out of the hatch and activated his wings, flying gracefully downwards towards the forest. I had never gotten to see him fly and felt a sense of pride as I looked out to see him glide above the trees.

“Where’s the chute?” Bucky called out.

“We’re at 200 feet, it’s too low for a chute,” Torres stated.

Bucky stalked towards the door, “I don’t need it anyway.”

“Neither will I,” I said, taking a step forward to see just how high we really were. I was confidant in my ability to keep up with Sam and wanted to prove my capability, but I was human. It went against every natural instinct to step out into the air and catch myself. Bucky moved to stand next to me, the two of us turning to face each other. This was the first time we’d actually made more than fleeting eye contact and I was finally able to get a good look at him. His features were sharp, his cheekbones and jaw were extremely prominent. Something more than scruff and less than a beard covered the bottom half of his face. His eyes were cerulean blue, just nearly matching the shade of my energy. Complete with a short, scruffy haircut, I wasn’t sure if handsome was a strong enough word for just how good looking James Barnes was.

“Ladies first,” Bucky nodded towards our exit, never breaking eye contact, “Sure you know what you’re doing?” I smiled smugly, matching the amount of sass radiating from his words, “Do you?”

Not wanting to give him the opportunity to think up a come back, I turned away from him and threw myself out of the plane. An unavoidable scream flew from my lips as I free fell, somehow managing in the chaos to threw my arms out at my sides and expel my energy to control my descent. Once I got a hold on maneuvering the winds, the act actually became almost enjoyable. I found myself laughing as I weaved between the trees, until my laughter was accompanied by a fast approaching scream above me. A shower of branches began to rain down around me forcing me to swerve to the side just in time for Bucky’s figure to come crashing through. He landed harshly on his back, limbs spread out and a pained groan escaping his lips.

I floated directly above him, “I stand corrected, you definitely know what you’re doing.” “I have all of that on camera. You know that, right?” Sam’s voice came through our comms. Redwing flew up from behind us and zoomed in on Bucky’s face.

“Get out of my face, Sam, or I’ll break it,” Bucky uttered, exhaustion filling his voice.

“Okay, head north. Come on.” I snickered at the exchange and lowered myself to the ground close enough to Bucky to extend him a hand. He accepted it and I helped pull him to an upright sitting position, trying to hide the fact that I struggled with his weight. “Thanks.” “Well, my mom taught me to always help my elders,” I said with a smirk, earning myself a scowl in response. “You’re as bad as Sam, aren’t you?” he moaned as he rose to his full height.

“Okay, okay,” I ceased my soft laughter, “I’m sorry. Seriously, are you okay? I know you’re a super soldier but still-” “I’m fine,” Bucky confirmed quickly, brushing the dirt from his jacket and turning north, “Let’s go.”

The two of us fell into a silence that wasn’t necessarily uneasy but certainly not relaxed. We weren’t enemies, we weren’t coworkers and we definitely weren’t friends. We’d spoken all of about five sentences to each other since meeting and none of them had been particularly chummy. “Sam only mentioned one sister,” Bucky broke the non-verbal spell.

“Sarah,” I stated, “We’re not technically related but they’re family. Sam told me he reached out to you and never got anything back. I think he was wondering how you were doing.” “Yeah, well…” he mumbled, stepping over a particularly large boulder and avoiding my gaze.

I decided not to push the subject, not only were we nearing the warehouse, Sam could hear us through the comms and Redwing. But I made a note of the lightning quick wave of emotion that crossed Bucky’s eyes. Sam was definitely a trigger for him, but I had a feeling this was something much more complicated. Something I didn’t have time to get too curious over.

We made it out of the forest and Redwing led us to the back entrance to the warehouse. The graffiti and wrecked roofing made me want to believe that nobody had been there in ages, but Sam’s intel contradicted the setting. My brother, the esteemed military man, was also contradicting his age as he maneuvered Redwing just above us to provoke Bucky into taking a swing at him. “Oh-ho-ho, don’t hurt him,” he teased as Redwing quickly avoided the assault.

Sam stood in the next room staring down at the screen on his wrist, scanning the building through Redwing’s camera. He took a quick look at me to assess that I hadn’t been injured in the fall before turning back.

“You’re doing the staring thing again,” he commented without looking up. That one I’d give him, Bucky’s smoldering stare game was intimidating especially when he wasn’t saying anything. “They’re in there,” Sam tilted his head towards the nearest open doorway and stretching his arm out so Bucky and I could see what Redwing was seeing. There was a truck with two people loading in containers of something.

“Where’s the guy?” Bucky asked.

“I don’t know. I think they’re smuggling weapons though.” “Well, I think you could be right,” Bucky’s voice lowered. “Hmm,” Sam nodded.

“But there’s only one way to find out,” Bucky turned towards the doorway, “I see a clear path, I say we take it.”

As soon as his boot hit the ground in its first step, Sam reached for his arm. “We’re not assassins.” “Shouldn’t we, I don’t know, observe from a distance rather than attack straight away?” I offered.

Bucky’s eyes flicked to me when I spoke and promptly back to Sam, throwing away my suggestion. He probably thought me naive. “I’ll see you inside or not.”

He pulled his arm out of Sam’s grip and went ahead, leaving Sam chuckling to himself. “Hey, come on, man. I’m just messing with you, come back,” he called softly. “‘I’m just messing with you,’ the Avengers’ official slogan,” I dryly jested, “Here I was thinking we were doing serious work. Is Redwing still surveying?” “Yeah,” Sam was still smiling to himself as he turned to watch Bucky stalk down the hallway, “Look at you. All stealthy. A little time in Wakanda and you come out White Panther.”

“It’s actually White Wolf,” Bucky responded in our ears.

“Huh?”

When we lost visual on Bucky, Sam snapped his fingers and nodded towards the hallway. We made our way through the various openings until we’d caught up, Sam held up a finger to his lips as we caught sight of Bucky and our steps became even softer.

“All right, I’m inside. Therefore way ahead of you,” Bucky bragged, turning back to where he thought we waited, “It’s not great but very doable.” His peripherals must have caught the red and white of Sam’s suit, he turned to see the two of us at his side. “Hello. How are you?” “Good. What did we miss? Nothing,” Sam replied.

“All right, let’s go,” Bucky moved to step forward again.

“No, wait,” Sam protested.

Bucky held up his prosthetic vibranium arm I had heard so much about. “I got a vibranium arm, I can take them.” “And I can fly, she can make things float, who gives a shit? Wait. I want to see where they’re going.” Bucky pointed towards the truck that was still being loaded, “There’s two people.”

“You only see two?” Sam started. “That’s what I saw,” Bucky confirmed.

“Let me see what Redwing sees.” “All right…” “Let’s see what Redwing sees…”

I held two fingers to my temple and rubbed, “My gosh, it’s like working with children.”

Sam fiddled with a few controls on the screen and activated the x-ray feature on his beloved drone, “Oh, look at that. How many people you see now? One, two…Oh, here it comes again.” Bucky sighed, unhappy to admit he was wrong, “Four. Five.” “Yeah, five.” “So they’re strong, whatever,” Bucky brushed off not only the math but our group’s capabilities. “Let’s go.”

“Barnes, wait,” I hissed as Sam reached out and took hold of his arm, his elbow hitting the metal shelves we were hiding behind and rattling something.

“Shit!” Sam whispered, he pulled me to his side to block me while Bucky ducked down. The group turned to investigate the noise but disregarded it at the lack of visible culprits. The trucks started and their doors were closed, each person getting into their designated vehicle. Sam started tapping on Redwing’s controller again, “There’s an eighth person. I think they have a hostage.”

With one look from Bucky, the three of us snapped into action. I raised myself into the air ahead of Sam who took off slightly behind me, looking down to see Bucky running impossibly fast. “Y/n, with me,” Sam called through the comms, I listened and hung back until he’d caught up. Bucky continued on his way until he’d climbed onto the back of the truck. I followed Sam’s lead as we flew to the side of the road.

“Shouldn’t we be helping him?” I asked as the two of us landed.

“They’re stealing medicine, vaccines,” Bucky’s voice filled my comm.

“He’s got it, we’re staying here and waiting for him to come back with the hostage. Then you and I are gonna keep following the trucks and see where they’re heading,” he explained, “I’m trying to keep you out of as much of the fight as I can.” “That’s the whole reason I came, Sam,” I argued, gesturing towards the road, “To help, to fight.”

“Bucky, talk to me,” Sam favored to ignore my desire to do dirty work, “What’s goin’ on?”

“Found the hostage,” he reported, followed only seconds later by a loud exclaim of “Shit!”

Adrenaline set every nerve alight in my body, something had gone wrong. Without asking for Sam’s permission I took off running down the road. I used my energy to lift towards the sky and flew the same way the truck’s had gone. Distantly, I heard Sam yell my name but made no effort to stop. “Barnes, talk to me,” I yelled over the winds I was flying against. As I spotted the trucks I saw the small silhouettes of figures standing atop one of them. Once I got closer, I could see that the one being aggressively pinned by two of them was Bucky. I landed on the vehicle’s roof just in time to see someone leap into the air, grab Redwing and break him with their knee. Between my want to help Bucky and my second hand protectiveness over Sam’s gear, I was pissed. The masked figure looked up at me, two brown eyes peeking out of eyeholes and marched forward, making me their next target. I created a ball of blue energy and aimed it at her, knocking her down but only for a second. She leapt towards me and landed a punch across my cheek, I went down with a groan and cradling my cheek. Now I was really pissed…

I opened an eye to see the shadow of Sam’s Falcon suit above me, he touched down on the truck and landed a kick to my assaulter’s abdomen. He quickly helped me to my feet as our enemy rose again and took a fight stance.

“Good of you to join the fight, Sam,” Bucky yelled before kicking one of his captors in the leg.

The person who had given me the shiner threw Sam aside to the second truck like he was weightless. She was far too small to be that strong, it was inhuman. I decided to hold back a little less and raised my hands toward her, extending waves of the blue energy and raising her up into the air. She struggled to try and escape my hold, grunting and groaning as she flopped around in the air. I was about to throw her into the trees when I was tackled from behind. We skidded towards the front of the truck till the boot of one of the thugs holding Bucky down hit me in the shoulder. Another masked figure, this one I suspected to be a man, had his arms wrapped tightly around my abdomen. He flipped me over and raised his head to slam into mine. Luckily he hadn’t thought to pin my arms down and his mistake allowed me to throw them in front of my face and create a force field that even the thickest of skulls couldn’t penetrate. I looked briefly to see Sam being pinned down as well on the second truck but couldn’t free myself to go help him.

And then, in a conflicting twist of events, a red white and blue shield came flying through the air.

As I struggled to keep the force field up and my arms locked, I made out an equally patriotic suited man throw the shield at the one who had punched me earlier. A second figure swung in from a helicopter and kicked her off the truck, leaving her clinging to the edge of the roof. The shield flew in the direction of the people holding Bucky down and hit one square in the back before bouncing back to its wielder. The guy holding me down was struck next and rolled right off of me, I sent a significantly bigger blast towards his chest that sent him flying off the back of the truck. Bucky reached down and helped me stand up, he pulled me out of the way when the shield came flying by our faces to hit his other attackers.

“You gotta be kidding me,” I panted.

John Walker stopped briefly to introduce himself to Sam, like he hadn’t been living rent free in our minds since that damned tv broadcast before sending the shield flying past Bucky and I again. As it bounced off our enemies and back towards Walker, Bucky’s metal hand snapped up to grab it only for Walker to retake it. The time for anger or sadness wasn’t now, though the forlorn expression on Bucky’s face said otherwise. I broke from him and launched myself across the gap between trucks to land near where Sam was being attacked. Bucky followed suit and we began taking out each person one by one till Sam stood and turned too fast, hitting and sending Bucky plus one of the masked thugs over the side of the truck. Sam and I turned to face our last attacker who was stalking toward us, Sam glanced over his shoulder quickly before looking back ahead. “When I say ‘now,’ you shoot up,” he ordered, “Now!” I blasted upwards and over the overhead road sign he’d known would hit our attacker. I was too high to drop down suddenly but watched as Sam touched back down on the truck to be punched off the truck, activating his wings and catching himself in the wind. I flew downwards and lined up with the side of the truck, searching frantically for Bucky while trying to dodge the cars to my left. Bucky was clinging for dear life to the underside of the truck. His attacker stomped his metal arm with his boot till Bucky lost his grip with it and it dragged along the road creating a flurry of sparks.

“Sam, what do we do?” I yelled into my comm. “Now when I say ‘drop,’ you drop.” “Are you insane?!” I screeched, looking down at the asphalt and trying to calculate how fast I may be going. “DROP!”

Putting the most trust I ever had in Sam, I stopped the energy flow and was tackled mid-air by him. I twisted in his arms to wrap my legs around one of his and my arms around his back. Without warning, he flew us under the nearest truck before letting go of me with one arm and tackling Bucky. I readjusted my grip to have one arm around both of them. We dropped out of the air and crash-landed, rolling like a grunting and groaning wheel through a field of yellow flowers. Eventually we ceased our tumbling with Bucky on top of Sam and me to the side still clinging to both of them.

“Could have used that shield,” Bucky ground out tauntingly in Sam’s face.

“Get off of me,” Sam strained, shoving Bucky off with another loud grunt. I rolled to his other side and coughed loudly, having had the wind knocked out of me during the crash. The three of us lay on our backs trying to regain our breath, Sam and I more than Bucky but I chalked that up to the fact that he was just as strong as the people we’d just gotten our asses handed to us by. “Those were all Super Soldiers, Sam,” he stated in awe.

“I know,” Sam confirmed, “You’re welcome, by the way.” He pushed himself up painfully on an elbow to lean over me, “Are you okay?”

I was finally starting to feel like I could get some semblance of a normal breath in. I’d have wished it was running around with AJ and Cass that would have showed me I was out of shape and not losing a fight to Super Soldiers. “‘Big Three’ my ass, Wilson,” I wheezed, making no effort to sit up yet.

“I said ‘might be’,” Sam weakly fought, “‘Might be.’ Clearly I was wrong.”

“Will wonders never cease?” Bucky winced as he sat up, “We need to get to the airport and reformulate.” “Oh, do we now? Do we need to reformulate?” Sam mocked from the ground, “I hadn’t thought of that yet, Bucky, what an incredible-“ I groaned loudly and forced my torso up, “Dear God above, if you two don’t stop acting like twelve year olds, I’ll catch a Delta flight home.” “Good, that’s where I wanted you,” Sam reprimanded as he rose to join me, “I told you if you took some stupid risk, you were going back home and what did you do? You took off on your own towards those trucks!” “I was trying to help him,” I threw my hand out towards Bucky, “One way or another I would have gotten hurt, Sam, whether I’d have waited for you or not. And now that I’ve actually seen what we’re dealing with? No way am I going home.” I rolled onto my knees and got to my feet, my muscles aching with each movement I made to stand in front of the two men. “When you two decide to start acting like adults, I’ll meet you back at the jet.”

Holding in each groan that wanted to escape my mouth, I started my trek back towards the road, not making it very far until I heard two pairs of footsteps behind me.

We walked that way for most of the way, Sam and Bucky muttering something every once in a while to each other and me ahead of them trying to wrap my head around the situation. I had gotten myself tangled in the world of super soldiers, ones who weren’t using their advanced capabilities to save the world from one of the actual Big Three. Not only that but we’d had the displeasure of being rescued by the person the three of us had wanted to see least in the world. I had started the day out having coffee with Sarah on our back porch and by eastern standard time zone’s definition was ending it in Germany mid-afternoon with a killer bruise developing on my cheek. Whatever I had expected to come from joining Sam, it sure as hell wasn’t this.

A car honk summoned me out of my thoughts, an open roofed vehicle came up beside me and I was quick to identify the passengers. John Walker and the helicopter soldier.

“So that didn’t go as planned, huh?” Walker attempted to make friendly conversation, specifically with Sam and Bucky but I could sense I was also welcome to answer. I didn’t cease my movements and neither did Sam and Bucky which only caused Walker to instruct the driver to get ahead of us again. “Look, at least we know what we’re up against now, huh? And we’re pretty sure it’s one of the Big Three, so…” “Aliens, androids, or wizards?” the unnamed soldier double checked with Walker, who responded that he was still almost certain.

“There’s no such thing as wizards,” Bucky grumbled from behind me, sounding like the old man he biologically was.

“Then it’s aliens, or androids,” Walker shrugged. “Or Super Soldiers,” Sam corrected.

“Shit, Super Soldiers, for real?” Walker’s sidekick asked before turning in his seat to face, “Do you believe that?” “I believe that you two don’t know how to take a hint,” I frustratedly smiled at him, “But yes, I do.”

“Wow. All right, well, then we gotta work together,” Walker said. Bucky scoffed, “That’s not happening.”

“I think we stand a much better chance if we all just-“ Bucky finally lost his patience and said the thing we all were thinking, “Just ‘cause you carry that shield, it doesn’t mean you’re Captain America.”

Walker was quick to defend himself, “Look, I’ve done the work, okay?”

Bucky was equally as quick to prove him wrong, “You ever jump on top of a grenade?” “Yeah. Actually, I have. Four times,” Walker explained, “It’s a thing I do with my helmet. It’s a reinforced helmet. It’s a long story, but, look…It’s 20 miles to the airport, you guys need a ride.” A sudden cramp tore through my shin causing me to sharply inhale and grab the leg. Through the pain I managed to exhale and begin limping back along the path, “We’re good, thanks.”

“At least let us take her, she’s injured,” I heard Walker attempt to convince Sam and Bucky, knowing that I was probably a means to an end to get them in the car.

I didn’t get very far before I felt Sam’s arm wrap around my waist, “C’mon…” As much as I wanted to fight him on it, I knew I wouldn’t make it more than a few steps before I was bent over again in pain. The adrenaline had worn off and my whole body was starting to ache deeply in a way that made even breathing hurt where it shouldn’t. I dropped my head in frustration and nodded, putting my arm around Sam’s shoulder to let him brace me. He helped me limp back to the car where Bucky gently handled my other side, the two of them lifted me into the vehicle where Walker and his friend tried to help me sit down. I shrugged off their unwelcome hands and used the roof’s poles to lower myself into a seat. Sam jumped in and sat on one side of me, gently lifting the leg that was really bothering me onto his lap to try and massaging my shin. Bucky climbed in on my other side and gave me a once over, trying to assess if I was in any further pain that I wasn’t letting on to.

“Okay,” Walker began as the car rocked to life again, “So we’ve got eight Super Soldiers on a bulk supply run. Why?” “They say their mission is to get things back to the way it was during The Blip,” Sam explained, “Maybe they’re just trying to help.” “They had a funny way of showing it,” Bucky commented.

“That serum doesn’t exactly have a great track record,” Walker quickly looked to Bucky, “No offense.” I tried not to judge people too harshly upon first meeting them, but I had no problem deciding right away that Walker was an asshole.

“We need to figure out where they’re going,” Sam spoke up before an argument could break out, “How’d you track ‘em here? The Flag Smashers?”

“Uh, no, we didn’t track them. We tracked you, uh, through Redwing,” Walker’s friend answered, dipping his head down to avoid Sam’s stony gaze.

“You hacked my tech?” “Sorry,” Walker laughed, “It’s not exactly hacking. It’s government property,” he gestured to himself, “Kind of the government.” My lips parted and I tilted my head, ”Are you kidding me?”

“I’m sorry,” Walker extended his hand out to me, “John Walker, Captain America. And you are?” I glanced between his hand and him, “Not impressed.” He awkwardly retracted it and turned away from me to Bucky, “Does he always just stare like that?” “You get used to it,” Sam replied, suddenly he had no problem with Bucky’s habit.

“Okay, look,” Walker cleared his throat, “You know things have gotten kind of, uh…” “Chaotic,” his friend finished for him.

“Yeah. The GRC, they’re doing the best they can to get things up and running smoothly, post Blip.” “Reactivating citizenship, social security, healthcare. Basically just managing resources for the refugees who were displaced by the return.”

“The Global Repatriation Council does all that, I get that,” Sam said impatiently, “So why exactly are you two here?”

“Well, they provide the resources and we keep things stable,” the soldier answered.

“Yeah, violent revolutionaries aren’t usually good for anyone’s cause,” Walker said. “Usually said by the people with the resources,” Sam looked up from the work he was doing on my leg to look dead at Walker.

“We got a lot of resources,” he stated confidantly, “If you guys, if you joined up with us, we could-“ “No,” Bucky and I said in unison, now having agreed on two things. Walker was a phony and wizards weren’t real.

“I got mad respect for both of ya’ll,” Walker’s friend complimented, “You too, ma’am. But you were kinda getting your asses kicked till we showed up.” Bucky finally dragged his stare off of Walker, “Who are you?” “Lemar Hoskins.” “Look, I see a guy hanging out of a helicopter in tactical gear, I need a lot more than Lemar Hoskins,” Sam commented.

“I’m Battlestar,” Lemar reintroduced himself, “John’s partner.” “‘Battlestar?’” Bucky echoed the ridiculous nickname, snapping his head suddenly toward the driver, “Stop the car!”

The driver obeyed and quickly halted in the middle of the road, giving Bucky the opportunity to jump out of the car. He raised his eyebrows expectantly, waiting for me to join him but I wasn’t about to leave Sam’s side. I held a hand up to him to which he responded by closing the back door and starting down the path that veered off the main road.

“Look, I…I get it, okay? I get the attitude, I do,” Walker started, he couldn’t come close to understanding how insulted all three of us were for one uniting reason, “You don’t think that the shield was gonna end up here. I get it, Bucky,” even the call of his name wasn’t enough to make him stop, “And I’m…I’m not trying to be Steve. I’m not trying to replace Steve.” “Could’ve fooled me,” I snorted, removing my leg from Sam’s lap as he’d stopped rubbing it long ago. “I’m just trying to be the best Captain America I can be, that’s it,” Walker focused his eyes on my brother, “It’d be a whole lot easier if I had Cap’s wingmen on my side.” Sam scoffed and looked out of the corner of his eyes at me as if to make sure he hadn’t heard incorrectly. He hadn’t, and I was about two seconds away from putting my powers to good use and beating Walker with his own shield that he could never truly hold ownership of. “It’s always that last line…”

Sam climbed over me and hopped out first before helping to lower me to the ground. A defeated Walker ordered the driver to leave and we watched to make sure they actually left for good. “Torres said he’s nice?” I asked sarcastically as we resumed our familiar posture of Sam helping me walk. “Torres is young, impressionable and follows every order he’s given. Guys like Walker have a problem with anyone who doesn’t take their every word as gospel.”

“Well, your mom made us attend enough church when we were kids for me to know that right there,” I pointed back to the car that was now a dot in the distance, “Is a false prophet.”

I trained my eyes ahead of us, Bucky hadn’t gotten too far and it looked like he had actually slowed his pace for us to catch up easier. While I was angry with the government for appointing Walker and the man himself, I knew that the pain Sam and Bucky were feeling was exponentially heavier to deal with. They’d already lost their friend and Walker was the salt being rubbed in the wound.

When we did eventually make it to the plane an hour later, I was biting back tears at how much pain I was in. Sam took notice of how I was trying to conceal them as we approached the tarmac and carried me the rest of the way.

“I gotta check for any internal bleeding,” he said as he set me down gently on the seats of the jet, “And you’re going home.” “No, I’m not,” I moaned. “Yes, you are,” he scolded as he lifted up my shirt to the bottom of my bra so that he could get a clear view of my abdomen, “Sarah’s gonna pound my ass into the ground as it is for bringing you back bruised.” My eyes could no longer stay opened, further fluttering shut as I didn’t hear Sam state that he saw anything concerning. “Get some sleep,” he ordered, “I’ll take care of anything I find.” Just before I drifted off, I heard a second body kneel down next to Sam. “She okay?” “Yeah, she’ll be fine,” he answered Bucky, “I just should have never brought her.”

————

When I did wake up, the plane was dark except for the minimal lighting towards the cockpit. I attempted to sit up, biting back a groan as I did. There was a blanket draped over my bottom half and my jacket was now folded underneath my head as a makeshift pillow. Sam was sleeping upright near my feet, arms crossed and snoring quietly.

“Glad to see you’re okay,” a quiet voice startled me, I turned to see it was Bucky. “A little out of my depth,” I remarked, rubbing one of my eyes, “But yeah, okay.”

Bucky nodded and looked back down at his folded hands, for some reason the contrast of the gold and black metal meeting the pale flesh fascinated me. He must’ve sensed I was staring because he peered up at me through his lashes. I quickly looked away, “I’m guessing we’re on our way back to New Orleans.” “Baltimore, actually,” he replied.

“What’s in Baltimore?” I whispered, trying not to wake Sam. “Someone that Sam needs to meet.” “Okay,” I slowly swung my legs off the seats to properly face him, “Who’s in Baltimore?” Bucky gave me a tired look, “Just someone, you’ll meet him too.” I bristled slightly at his answer, shooting him a half smile. “You don’t trust people, do you, Barnes?”

I wouldn’t call what his lips did was a smile, but maybe a sarcastic knock off of one. “You ask a lot of questions, you know?”

“Only when people don’t give me any answers,” I fired back in a contradictorily easy tone, “Look, you don’t have to trust me. That’s fine, I’m going home after whatever surprise you have for us anyway so you won’t have to deal with me slowing you guys down anymore.” “Sam was endangering you by bringing a civilian to an Avengers level fight,” he quickly said, “That’s on him, not you. And none of us were exactly at our best today.” A supercut of the three of us each getting slapped around silly on top of the trucks played in my mind. He was definitely right, nobody could have predicted that we’d be thrown for such a loop. Not even the man pretending to be Captain America. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry about Walker,” I offered as softly as I could, “I’ve watched him parade that shield around on tv for days and I’ve gotten angrier each time. Not saying it’s the same as what you’re feeling but…I’m just sorry.” Bucky didn’t respond, he actually looked away from me and back down at his hands. “You should get some more sleep, we’re still a ways out.” It was clear I wasn’t going to get anywhere with him, not that I felt any burning desire to try to get him to open up. I’d only tried out of politeness and the slight glimmer of curiosity I held when it came to what lay beneath his hardened surface. “Goodnight, Barnes,” I said, laying back down and rolling over so I didn’t have to look at him any longer.

----

A/N: Let me know what you thought and/or if you’d like to be tagged! There’s still a lot of surprises that are coming...

Safe Haven taglist: @tanyaherondale @wanniiieeee @asoftie4bucky @edencherries @i-reblog-fics-i-like @ttalisa @gcfty @withyoutilltheendofthismess @rinaispunk @weirdowithnobeardo @felicityofbakerstreet @godlypotterwhodiaries @eternalharry @voguesir @mizz-kraziii @okayline @smellmymisunderstoodfluff @wanderin-stories @nicklet94 @intricate-melody @aesthethickks @stumbleonmywords @simplybarnes @21bruhs @lostinwonderland314 @superbookishhufflepuff @themaddies-obx

#bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x fem!reader #sam wilson x reader #sam wilson x platonic!reader #marvel imagine

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magicalfxgirl · 3 years

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Why did Hades allow Heracles to take Cerberus? Part 1

Something has been irking me about Greek mythology and incident involving everyone's favorite doggo. Cerberus and the famous hero, Herakles or better known by his Roman Hercules. This is based on Og Greek Mythology and thus consistency sake I will using his Greek name Heracles.Quick note its extremely funny that Heracles is named after the woman who tried to kill him countless time. Disney lied big time with that change along with entire plot, but this is not the time or place to talk about that disaster. In Greek mythology the Herakles had to perform twelve tasks given to him by King Eurystheus of Tiryns. His final task was to bring the King, Cerberus to King Eurystheus of Tiryns. This should have been impossible for one important reason, Herakles killed at least 4/5 of Cerberus's siblings while completing his twelve labors. Confused well here is a brief backstory about Cerberus.

Quick back story

Here is the run down. Cerberus is one of several monsters who share the same parents, Typhon and Echidna. Typhon and Echnida were monsters that Gaia. Gaia grandma to Zeus and Great grandma twice over to Herakles. Gaia created the monster to get rid of the olympians namely Zeus. They failed, but parented the following monsters: Cerberus, the sphinx, the Nemean Lion a lion with skin so thick no weapon could pierce it. The Lernaean Hydra (Hydra) "a gigantic water-snake-like monster with nine heads (the number varies), one of which was immortal. Anyone who attempted to behead the Hydra found that as soon as one head was cut off, two more heads would emerge from the fresh wound" (britannica). The Chimera was a monstrous fire-breathing hybrid creature. Ladon,The Dragon which guarded the golden apples. The Caucasian Eagle who ate Promethesus liver as punishment for giving humans fire.Colchian Dragon) which protected the golden fleece, the Cromminia Sow, and the gorgons. Last, but not least Orthrus/Orthos,the two headed doggo with a snake for a tail who protected Geryon's cattle. All of which ended up dead then thrown in the sky to become constellations with the exception of Cerberus. Of the eleven, 45% were slain by Heracles. So which of Cerberus' kin died at the hands of Heracles let's start with his first labor.

From Persephone and Hades Ficilets by Gaumeo

Labor 1: Slay The Nemean Lion

The first labor was to slay the Nemean Lion. Note the labors were mainly created by Hera to lead Herakles to his death. The Nemean Lion would kill countless men by either kidnapping young women which guys would then try to rescue. It also was said to appear as a beautiful girl lead men to its lair them smite them. It makes sense to why the King need this mean kitty gone. The Nemean Lion had skin that no blade could peirce, thus Heracles could not kill through normal means. So he got help from Athena who warned him the Nemean Lion's own claws were thing able to peirce its skin. So Heracles choked the Lion that killed it with its own claws. Some people say that the lion skin he wore belonged to another lion he killed. If so it would still be rumbing in the fact he killed Cerberus's brother. One why would get rid of a lion skin that was impentrable to anything. Herakles kept it that is only thing that makes sense. The Nemean Lion body became the constellation Leo. Something poor Cerberus can't see because he lives in the Underworld.

Labor 2: Slay the Hydra

The Lernaean Hydra (Hydra) "a gigantic water-snake-like monster with nine heads (the number varies), one of which was immortal. Another obvious labor for the king to give Heracles, as like its sibling the Nemean Lion it was a man eater. To add the difficulty the Hydra's blood is poisonus and when one head was chopped off three would grow in its place. Heracles had help from his nephew Iolaus. As in order to stop more heads from regrowing Heracles, Iolaus to burn the ends of the neck with fire to stop the ever growing head issue. He slayed the Hydra and likes its sibling before it became a constellation. In this case the constellation known as the Hydra. Again a constellation that Cerberus could never see. Heracles also dipped his arrows in the Hydra's blood to embue them with the poison. Something that bites Heracles later on.

Conclusion

I am ending it here because I don't want this blog long. Part 2 gets to the other possible siblings Cerberus lost to Herakles. Also how someone close to our favorite doggo may have gotten revenge on him for both the doggo and its master. So far Heracles has killed two of Cerberus' siblings and the question persist why Heracles was allowed near Cerberus. Next up the final 2/3 siblings of Cerberus killed by Heracles.

#lore olympus #lore olympus hades #hades x persephone #cerberus

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kendrixtermina · 5 years

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Common Edelgard-related misconceptions

It has come to my attention that some people (chiefly people who have never played CF) have been throwing out some assumptions as fact which are directly contradicted in the actual text.

“Edelgard stayed with Lambert and Patricia at some point”

Actually even Dimitri himself says that he had no idea she was related to Patricia until much later, and that he met her when his father was visiting Arundel on an errand. Indeed he specifies that Patricia never even mentioned having another kid (which in hindsight should’ve been a red flag concerning Patricia)

Edelgard was staying with Arundel/Thales the whole time which can’t have been pleasant. having one (1) friend probably helped make things more bearable (as she herself acknowledges) and she’s somewhat sad that they ended up fighting, but that’s it.

Edelgard and everyone close to her never refer to her time in Faerghus as anything other than a traumatic kidnapping.

Notable examples:

Edelgard’s C support with Manuela

Edelgard’s B support with Hubert

Hubert’s B support with Byleth

The coronation scene

None of these suggest Family Funtime Vacation with your divorced mom. (which is why it lowkey irks me that all those fluffy modern AUs completely ignore her half of the family / her complete personality beyond ‘vaguely bossy yuppy’ really)

Obviously, this would get somewhat overshadowed by the more dramatic horrific stuff that happened later, but I think this tends to be overlooked as a formative experience of its own / yet another experience where she was basically helpless with zero control over anything and hence yet another reason why she consistently choses death over capture.

As per her goddess tower scene she has zero memory of her mother.

She definitely never once considered Dimitri any sort of brother, just some guy she was friends with long ago when she had no responsibilities or fully formed opinions and would probably been starved for any sort of contact, by the time part I happens she finds what based on what she knows is an overly familiar attitude/ inexplicable fixation rather off-putting.

Depending on what dialogue options you pick you could play through CF without ever finding out that they met before the academy at all. And I mean how often do you think about some dude you had a crush on when you were 12?

(Of course from his PoV it looks like he’s being coldly snubbed and then betrayed by one of his last remaining relatives especially since he seems wholly oblivious about the kidnapping part, likely because Arundel fed Lambert some sobstory to get asylum)

This is probably part of why she goes out of her way to be nice to Petra; She used to be in the same situation.

“Edelgard got her information about the church’s supposed misdeeds from the Agarthans”

Besides witnessing what anyone with eyes could conclude from the church’s actions during part I, she says multiple times that she gets her info from what has been passed down in her family, which used to be complicit.

She knows what Rhea did cause until the Southern Church was expelled from Adrestia roughly a 100 years before, the Hresvelgs were helping her do it.

Why would she want to believe that her ancestors were all bad people and her family’s legacy based on selling out humanity for power?

She doesn’t just accept it and run with it either. Early on in part 2 you can spot a troupe of imperial sholars in the library whom she marched into the monastery to try to reconstruct the truth from the purged records - that’s where she gets the bits of information from that she discusses with Byleth throughout CF.

Nothing of what she finds out is outright incorrect, just missing some key context (chiefly, what the “dispute” between Nemesis and Seiros was about/ what Nemesis DID. There’s certainly the very human bias to assume that if someone lied to you often enough then everything the say must be lies, but given her disgust at similar Agarthan murderfests in the present, I highly doubt she’d approve if she knew). It’s kinda Rhea’s lies coming back to bite her/ karma exploding in her face, because, why would Edelgard think that Seiros killing the 10 Elites was a bad thing if she hadn’t made them out to be heroes?

At one point in part I she scoffs at Thales referring to Nemesis as a ‘thief’ and basically ignores what he said / draws a different conclusion later.

It should also be noted that she’s not fighting Rhea because of anything to do with the past but because she is a tyrant in the present and has been for the last 1000 years or so, no matter what her backstory is.

I mean Edelgard’s is basically the same (almost her whole clan murdered by Agarthans and the corrupt humans who cooperated with them) but say what you will about her, at least she understands that her classmates are not to blame for what their fathers did, and she was eventually gonna step down from power willingly and let the people rule themselves as soon as she’d made sure that commoners would also get a say. Those two things alone put her miles above Rhea.

#edelgard #edelgard von hresvelg #fe3h #fire emblem: three houses #fire emblem three houses

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mahalkitajohnnysuh · 4 years

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A Preface on What’s to Come

So I’m writing this almost a month since my home country declared a community quarantine (which has now become enhanced and will last until the end of the month) due to the current pandemic. I could’ve done this earlier, but given how everything felt (and still is) chaotic about the situation, I had to prioritize some things and compose myself first before coming here.

Now that’s out of the way, I am writing this to serve as an introduction to what’s going to unfold in this blog a few days (or weeks) from now. I don’t want you, my dear reader, to go into this blindly, so this primer will consist of three parts that I advise you read first before I get to post my fics. Without further ado…

I. Why I Stan Who I Stan, aka Why I Love Johnny Suh

He wouldn’t be the name of this blog if I didn’t love him, right? But he wasn’t my first bias in the group at all. So let me take you back to the beginning, which was in late 2019 where I rediscovered SHINee. I was already in a nostalgic kick then, listening to my anime soundtracks and J-Pop a few weeks earlier. When I saw my friend and officemate’s SHINee compilation in her hard drive, I had to copy it since I think I’m ready to listen to them again. I don’t know if other Shawols experienced this but it felt painful to listen to the group after Jonghyun passed away. Although the rest of the boys still carried on in making more music, it took me until last year to fully move on.

Anyway, listening to SHINee led me to rediscover and love K-pop again. I became immersed in Taemin’s solo work – yes, I am almost three years late to MOVE but I would still love to perfect its choreography – and it was love at first listen to KEY’s solo album. After all, they were my next two biases after Jonghyun.

Since their solo works were not enough to satiate my K-pop hunger, I learned that Taemin was going to be a part of Super M and that opened more boy groups to me. I learned of EXO (I pretty much ignored them when I was in college because I am pretty loyal to SHINee and Super Junior at the time) and NCT because of this supergroup that was going to debut in the States pretty soon. I even set my alarm to watch their debut stage in LA on YouTube because I’m that excited for them!

So at first, Mark was my bias in NCT, followed by Ten. If you concluded that I have a thing for English speakers, then yes, maybe that’s the case why they appealed to me more than the others (except Taemin, of course, he will always be my favorite). Then one thing led to another, which means I fell into an NCT hole of watching their videos on YouTube. One of the first ones I watched was their Buzzfeed interview and Johnny’s humor struck me the most. I watched more, and then I realized that hey, I want to be friends with this guy; I think we’ll get along well.

Since I only have my childhood best friend to talk to about my renewed K-pop obsession, I told her I was going to write fics again. Being the supportive person that she is, she read them and commented on them once she was done. And yes, I am going to share those with you and I hope you’ll let me know what you think about them.

There was a line in one fic that caught her attention, prompting me to write about the character and Johnny being best friends who eventually fall in love with each other. I took on her challenge, and the more that I wrote, the more that I fell for him. I watched more videos of him too so I would be more inspired to write. That worked since I was able to write a fic (or two!) every day while I didn’t do anything at work.

I don’t want to call it a slow burn because I knew it took me a couple of weeks to fully fall for Johnny. Let’s just say he grew on me in a short period and you’ll read more about that in the fics to come.

So as early as now, I’m going to warn you guys that most of my fics will have lengthy introductions too because I like to explain myself a lot.

II. When Y/N Gets a Real Name

The first fics I wrote started with just Y/N. My childhood best friend, who continues to serve as my audience, didn’t mind it initially but then gave me the suggestion to give Y/N a name. She added that a play on my name would be nice and Y/N eventually became Essie. Since I go by J here, I’ll leave you to assume what my real name is which will eventually be revealed anyway since that’s her real name too.

You may also assume that the fics are a manifestation of my delulu dreams and let’s be honest here – aren’t most, if not all, fics that way? Especially when there’s Y/N involved, don’t you agree? Since I have been writing these fics for almost six months now, Essie has developed into a character of mine that is similar to me and at the same time, an annoying person who irks me sometimes. I’ll get around to that but for now, I feel she is more than just a projection of a fangirl’s deepest, darkest desires.

I hope you won’t mind if she is the subject of affection for the fics unless stated. But for now, she’s had her way with the boys – and yes, the fics aren’t all about her and Johnny.

P.S. My childhood best friend was one of the first characters to have a name in my fics and it’s also one of Kai’s many nicknames. If you are a true EXO-L, then you’d know that in a heartbeat. I find it cute because that’s also one of her many nicknames and her bias in the group is Kai, so…I live to please.

III. Purpose and Other Things You Need to Know About This Blog

The main purpose why I put up this blog is to share my works with everyone. I just don’t want to be limited to my childhood best friend, you know?

And to be honest, I have written for a lot of fandoms but my fics never got to see the light until now. I don’t know why I suddenly feel so confident to share them this time but I hope that they will make you feel things – whether that’s happy, sad, giddy, loved, or whatever – and you can let me know what you think. I would appreciate it if you can give constructive criticism, and of course, I would love it if you’ll share your favorite parts. I often re-read my fics for inspiration and most of the time, they crack me up because I would have never thought to write something about this or that.

This is also not strictly a Johnny and Essie blog since it will also feature other K-pop groups that I am a fan of. In short, expect appearances from other SM Entertainment boy groups as well. Johnny and Essie aren’t the only pairings here since I also love other NCT members but not as much as I love my gentle giant. Since you already know my first bias, then you’ll get to read about my bias wrecker soon.

The fics are also not in chronological order because I don’t work that way. I write what I think of and things build up from there. So if I post something about Johnny and Essie being friends on one day and then have them as a couple in the next, don’t be surprised. Maybe once all scenarios have been written, then I can piece them in proper order.

I may not be able to update daily because I have to focus on my day job first. But I will still try my best to post here as often as I could and interact with you guys.

So if you have further questions that you think I have not covered, then let me know through the comments.

Here’s to a fluffy, cheesy, and sometimes smutty reading experience!

Mahal ko kayong lahat! :)

#author's note #nct fanfic #nct 127 fan fic

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nianderful · 5 years

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nia’s 30 days of witchaversary (days 1-17)

um, oops?

i meant to do this sooner, i swear, but i’ve been very busy with work and other real life stuff this month

i actually wasn’t intending to do this at all, but since my initial plans to celebrate WITCH have kind of fallen off, i may as well jump on the bandwagon! i hope i’m not too late 😅

day 1: favorite guardian

orube! i absolutely adore this girl. she’s such a great character--appearing to be a hardened warrior but in reality is the biggest softie...while also kicking a lot of ass. i love her interactions with the guardians, i love the depth she has, and while i could gush about cedrube all day, they deserve its own space.

honorable mentions go to....well, the rest of w.i.t.c.h., will and taranee in particular. i relate to both of them a lot (mostly with being pretty shy and socially awkward)

day 2-favorite villain

(will smith poses) THIS GUY. i know everyone and their mother loves phobos, but i am not Everyone And Their Mother. i honestly think phobos is kind of lame

cedric on the other hand, is a different story. this guy’s a CHAD. he was the one Actually Doing Stuff in the first arc. HE was the one pulling weight during phobos’ scheme in the fourth arc, AND ludmoore’s in the fifth.

also he’s just a great villain in general; a consistent threat through and through, powerful as heck (unlike his tv counterpart who got his tail whooped by everyone) and do i even NEED to bring up him and orube? (i’m gonna get to them, i promise)

day 3- favorite love interests

i honestly think all the WITCH bois are good but if i could pick a favorite....

peter! he’s just so good. a sweetheart, a looker, a great big brother.....he’s perfect. (like tadashi, ‘cept he doesn’t die)

look at him and corny being goofy. love is real and it’s in the picture above me.

day 4: favorite pairing/ship

aww man this is a long time comin’ so let’s get it DONE

cedrube. always cedrube. forever cedrube.

these two are just....so good. a twosome on opposite sides, brought together by their shared experience of being Fish Out of Water. orube brought out the best in cedric (his semi-redemption, anybody?) and cedric allowed orube to experienced something she longed for.

if only their ending was as happy as they are in this picture...

day 5-favorite friendship

picking all of w.i.t.c.h. would be too predictable, so i choose...

these two! i love how irma and hay lin are Those Two Gals, joking around when the others are being serious. these two are perfect together, and i love the scenes when they’re messing around.

day 6: favorite cover/promo/pin up art

the cover for issue 56!

ugh i love this. it’s gorgeous; the movement’s fluid, the expressions are on point, and it’s a tribute/celebration of the tv series! (particularly with the girls curled up in element colored balls; a reference to the toon transformation)

day 7: favorite issue

had to go with the one that started it all, issue 1. this series has been with me for a long time, and i remember being so captivated with the first issue. i may sing the praises of precure, but w.i.t.c.h. was actually my very first magical girl series, and this issue was my very first experience with the genre. i will always hold it close to me.

day 8-favorite special

the orube special! orube sadly isn’t a character that gets much play outside of her role as w.i.t.c.h’s ally/honorary guardian, but this issue gives us just that! we get to see her get a job, make friends, and learn a little more about how to be an earthling.

day 9-favorite guardian uniform

i’ll pick taranee’s!

it looks the most....practical to me. like, if i was a guardian, i’d wear something like this. also i ADORE the fact that tara keeps her glasses in guardian form. any other show would have them get magicked away, but not here. as a Black Girl With Glasses, it’s a detail i really appreciate.

day 10-favorite world/planet

um. kandrakar, i guess?

it’s pretty.

day 11-something awesome

speaking of tara....

this moment from issue 4. another moment i remember vividly from my childhood, and one of the first scenes that shows us that taranee is not to be messed with. don’t play with fire INDEED.

day 12-something that made me cry

i have yet to cry when reading this comic, but a moment that really made me sad was when will’s dormouse died

this really hurt, not just because it came after the hope spot of will’s dad going away, as well as nerissa’s defeat, but because ol’ dormouse had been a staple of the series to this point, and it was clear that he formed a bond with will. just a really cruel moment to end the second arc on. (but not in a bad way, of course)

day 13-something heartwarming

the last page of issue 20!

issue 20 is a bit of a roller coaster for poor will; she’s slowly being manipulated by nerissa, to the point where she shuts herself off from the girls. on the side, we have yan lin beginning to worry about history repeating itself with the current guardians.

but then this happens, a moment that shows us that WITCH will not suffer the same fate as the team that came before them.

will just spent the scenes before this pushing away from her teammates, even attacking them; for them to say that they trust her irrevocably says a LOT about their faith in will, and the friendship of WITCH itself.

day 14-something that irked me

everything about the arkhanta arc that doesn’t involve orube or the astral drops!

(reader beware, it’s about to get personal Up In Here. mentions of ableism to follow.)

we may as well start with the backstory of ari, because his relationship with his son and how it’s handled is going to be the epicenter of everything i’m discussing.

‘yeah once upon a time there was a happy farmer who had a kid, but oh no he’s nonverbal and can’t communicate! happy farmer is sad now” (also he may have told kandrakar to Fix It but Oracle Said No)

see the problem here? it’s okay if you don’t, because i’m here to explain!

basically the villain of this arc is an Autism Dad who thinks his son needs to be Fixed. he constantly angsts about the fact that his son doesn’t talk, smile, or say I Love You....basic whiny Autism Parent stuff.

except we’re supposed to sympathize with him. we’re supposed to see him as a poor innocent man instead of, you know, someone who may be unintentionally hurtful with his woe-is-me-isms (also will insisting that he’s in the right...)

and as if that’s not irksome enough....

maqi gets cured in the end. he’s speaking, he’s emoting, he’s not The Broken Kid anymore!

yeah, uh, no. i have autism, and have exhibited some of maqi’s traits on a regular basis. (and it’s not just me, my little sister imani was nonverbal for a lot of her childhood. we didn’t even think she was going to be able to talk.) and as someone who’s felt like i was a Broken Kid, that some thing was wrong with me, and has wondered Why Can’t She Just Be Normal....this ending does NOT fly with me, and neither does ari as a character.

ari’s not a Sympathetic Sad Dad, he’s an ableist douchecanoe. there’s a REASON i compared him to autism moms. maqi’s “problem” isn’t that he’s sick or anything (the comic even SAYS he’s perfectly healthy!!) he just isn’t emotive or talkative....and for the comic to paint as something that has to be fixed is more than a little gross. i know the comic wasn’t intending to offend with this, but that’s exactly what it did.

thank goodness for orube and the astral drops, or this would’ve been my least favorite arc.

day 15-something that needs a quick fix

um. i got nothing for this one.

day 16-something that needs an overhaul

the arkhanta arc. either cut out the ‘must cure my son of his autistic-coded traits’ or create a new conflict all together. (like the whole maqi thing could’ve been fixed with simply giving him and illness or putting him into a coma!)

and like everyone else, i’d like a overhaul of new power and beyond.

day 17-something that needs to be resisted

sweet mother of monkey milk, the astral drops. i wanna see how they’re doing. i wanna see what their lives are. do they remember anything, even secretly?

also visit orube while we’re at it, see how she’s doing post 5th arc.

#w.i.t.c.h.#30daysofwitchversary #MAN THIS WAS A LOT #and sorry it's so late i was really trying to get this done before the day ended #ableism mention

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lieuwrites · 5 years

Text

Never Been In Love | Boo Seungkwan | Oneshot

Title: Never Been In Love

Pairing: Seungkwan x Reader

Synopsis: Seungkwan craves love and his best friend couldn’t care less for it. | Friends to Lovers - Fanfic Trope Showdown Writing Challenge

Genre/Warnings: Friends to Lovers, fluff, angst, Non-idol!AU, College!AU, female reader, slow burn, angst (?), reader says ‘bullshit’ once lmao, mention of sex, Svt side characters (Maknae Line + mention of Jeonghan)

Words: 5.1k

POV: 2nd person

Requested: No

“We’re both graduating next year and we’re both still virgins”

Seungkwan was lying down on the floor with his legs propped up on your dorm room sofa. He was staring up at the ceiling with his hands resting underneath his head and a facial expression that told you he had been thinking a little too hard. That was a clear sign that he had gone into one of his moods; the type of unsettling, anxious mood that everyone feels after thinking about an unclear future or an unfulfilled life.

You looked down at him, the poor guy, and continued on washing the dishes you both had used to eat dinner, responding to his statement in a joking manner, “so should we make a sex pact?” Seungkwan shook his head and got up into a sitting position, clearly unamused at his best friend's joke of a suggestion.

“That’s not what I’m trying to say at all. I’m saying that we have gone 21 years in our life and have been single for the entirety of it.” He huffed and crossed his arms, brows furrowed and mind getting caught on that same train of thought.

“Being virgins has nothing to do with the fact that we’re single. We could go down to any frat party going on down the road and come back without our v-cards,” you stated, drying your hands and going to sit next to Seungkwan.

“But doesn’t it seem better to do it with someone you’ve known and loved for so long? Doesn’t the idea of knowing someone else’s body better than your own excite you? Knowing where to touch to make them feel good? And not just in a sexual way, if you needed to comfort them you’d know how to cheer them up, how they like to be cuddled and how to make their life seem so much brighter.” The boy spoke with so much desire.

Seungkwan was the type of person who daydreamed a little too hard about the perfect life and in his mind, the perfect life consisted of a beautiful partner and two or three children, all living in a nicely furnished family home. He longed to love and be loved.

“It sounds nice but you know what sounds even better?” You looked at Seungkwan and he raised a brow at you, “letting life take its course.” Before Seungkwan could rebuttal your suggestion, you held up your hand to stop him and kept talking.

“If you get too caught up in trying to find ‘the one’ you’ll scare them off. Then when you don’t meet them you start to get desperate and by the time you’re 40 you find that you’ve ended up just settling for someone that you don’t actually love but it’s too late to get out of that relationship because you’ve already put too much time and effort in and all of that would’ve been a waste so you just end up… stuck.”

A quietness settled down between you two until Seungkwan elbowed you lightly in the side and scoffed. “That sounds a little too real, how are your parents?”

You let out a bitter chuckle before speaking, “Still miserable.”

There was a time when you had once asked your mom a burning question that had popped into your head after reading one too many relationship magazine articles. It went along the lines of “if you had never given birth to me, would you and dad still be married?” and her response was “No. If you hadn’t been born, I would’ve divorced him years ago.”

Your parents didn’t hate each other, in fact, they loved each other dearly but they weren’t in love. They were both missing out on potential lifelong relationships with the loves of their lives but were stuck in some sort of love limbo because they were too scared to lose what they’ve already built.

You wouldn’t say that you were scared of falling in love but seeing the way your parents lived, both of them just simply existing in the same house, made you okay with the thought that there was a chance you never would fall in love. There was also the fact that you would always have people you knew you could love and love you back. Family and friends would last you the rest of your life. You didn’t need to fall in love because you already loved who you had.

The idea of never being in love, however, didn’t sit well with Seungkwan. This then lead to your current situation.

Seungkwan had roped you into going on a double date. His friend, Vernon, would set him up with a girl from one of his music theory classes and Seungkwan would set him up with a girl from his world business class. Unfortunately for you, Seungkwan’s classmate had cancelled last minute and he was forced to bring you along with him.

If it weren’t bad enough, the girl that Vernon had planned to set Seungkwan up with seemed to only have her eyes on Vernon. This then lead to an awkward double date with you four sitting at a small diner close to your campus.

“So…” you started off, hoping someone would speak up. The three turned to you expectantly with looks that made you feel sort of guilty about not having anything important to say. “The chips are kind of soggy don’t you think?” You turned to Vernon and he smiled, popping a chip into his own mouth. He nodded while chewing and downed the sad excuse of a chip down with his soda. “Should we ask for new ones?” he proposed but you shook your head knowing the moody waiter, Jeonghan, would likely return the same plate of fries after taking it to the back.

Vernon was easy enough to get along with; you’d meet up with him and Seungkwan from time to time which meant it was easy enough on your part. The hard thing for you was watching Seungkwan get shut down every time he would try to talk to his date. He’d initiate conversation and she’d reply with dead answers.

You leaned over to Vernon and whispered, “you really fucked up with this one dude, was it hard choosing between this girl and Satan?”

He then moved his head to reply, his lips almost touching the shell of your ear making you shiver slightly, “I know, I suck. What makes me feel even worse is that Seungkwan made the best possible choice for me.” He then sat back up straight and winked at you and boy did your heart flutter.

The next day you woke up in a bed that you could tell wasn’t your own. You moved to get up but the arm around your waist kept you stationed under the blankets. The touch was warm and familiar, bringing a smile of comfort to your features. You rubbed at your eyes and your blurry vision slowly disappeared, revealing a sleeping Seungkwan. He looked as peaceful as a child who was surrounded by their stuffed toys, only instead of stuffed toys, Seungkwan was bundled up in a blanket that wrapped around the both of you.

In the moment that you were admiring his features, you were suddenly hit with the realisation that you were pressed up against your best friend. Sleepovers weren’t anything new, let alone sleeping in the same bed, but after last night, the moment seemed a little intimate, like something that should stay unspoken between the two of you when the both of you moved on with your days. You knew that the two of you would be a little more emotionally connected after what went down the previous night.

Last night’s double date was fine, great even, however Seungkwan didn’t feel the same way. He brought you to his own dorm afterwards and let everything out to you about how he was sad about being single, how he felt that he was missing out on crucial life experiences and how he hated how well everything was going between you and Vernon.

(”What’s so bad about me and Vernon getting along?” You could tell how irked Seungkwan was about the situation but you couldn’t help getting annoyed at his disdain for you and Vernon.

“It was just so annoying seeing how much you two were enjoying each other and how your eyes would turn to hearts whenever the other would so much as to look in your direction.” Seungkwan paced back and forth in front of your figure sitting on his bed.

“Because of what?! Don’t tell me it’s because you have some bullshit feelings about me.”

“Because!” He paused in front of you to continue, “It sucks seeing you, someone who could hardly give a damn about being in a relationship, actually get a chance to do something that I, someone who actually wants to fall in love, have been waiting for for ages!” His frustration had gotten to him and you could see tears start to well up in his eyes. That was so Seungkwan. Only he could get worked up about something so trivial.

Your heart ached seeing your best friend try to hold back tears.

You gently took his hand and pulled him to sit down next to you, wrapping your arms around him and letting his silent tears fall. You didn’t say anything because you couldn’t understand how he could feel so strongly about a topic you couldn’t care less about, but you did understand the level of frustration someone would feel about seeing someone get something that you deserved more.

After a few minutes of silence, Seungkwan spoke up quietly, “I just can’t help feeling so lonely. I have you and I have all of my other friends, but I don’t have that special someone.”)

You lifted his arm from your waist and got up, collected your things, and left. As much as you wanted to stay in bed and sleep in with Seungkwan, you needed to get ready.

Vernon was probably already waiting.

Seungkwan was right. You did have some sort of crush on Vernon after last night and you could tell he had some sort of crush on you too. Meeting up with him wasn’t entirely self motivated because he did offer to try and do a better job at finding Seungkwan his ‘match made in heaven’. You weren't there for yourself, that was just a perk, you were there for Seungkwan.

Apparently, the best place to be discussing such an important topic was in the local arcade with the constant chatter, flashing lights and loud arcade games. The two of you had gone through half the arcade, just enjoying each other’s company before you eventually remembered that you hat to remind Vernon of the real reason you were there. After a race on the ‘Super Bike 2’ arcade game, you were seated in one of the food booths waiting for the boy to come back with your plate of fries.

He arrived and sat into the seat in front of you, sliding your plate across the table to you.

“Hopefully these fries are better than the ones we had last night,” He joked.

You gave a curt laugh and nibbled on a fry, trying to figure out how to bring the topic up. “About last night…”

“Don’t tell me,” He cut you off, “You’re only here out of politeness and you’re going to try to let me down nicely.”

“What? No, I’m here to talk about Seungkwan. Remember? Last night you said that we should meet up to find someone else to set Seungkwan up with.”

The two of you fell silent. Eventually Vernon broke the silence with a soft ‘oh…’ and popped another fry into his mouth. “Honestly, I thought you knew I was joking about that.”

“You were joking?!”

“Well yeah, it was my way of asking you on a date…”

After the entire time of loud games and rowdy conversation, that one moment of silence was enough to equal out the entire day of noise. None of you knew how to break the silence and instead decided eating was the best way to deflect the conversation.

You couldn’t help but imagine how embarrassed Vernon was. This whole time he thought you two were on a date and here you were thinking of another guy. Granted, you enjoyed the day like it was a date but in your mind, the idea was non-existent.

“There’s… There’s this girl,” you looked up from the stain on the ground at the sound of his voice, “she’d be perfect for him. They share the same type of mindset and their personalities are basically spot on.” He spoke which a type of unsureness, like he wasn’t telling the whole tale. You gave him a look that told him to keep going and he sighed.

“How much do you want this for him?”

Although the question may have caught you off guard, you replied almost instantly, out of instinct, “more than anything. You may not believe me but it physically hurts me seeing him so sad about something so dumb.”

Vernon nodded, opening his mouth to continue and hesitated for a bit, eventually getting to his point.

“She already has a boyfriend.”

If Seungkwan was ever in any sort of trouble, you would do anything for him. Cheat, lie and murder; you would go as far as you needed --at least, that’s what you would tell him constantly-- but watching through the cafe window at the couple that Vernon introduced as Min and Chan, there was no way you could break up their relationship. You had agreed to meet up with Vernon to meet the girl under the guise of a double date, but that meant you had to watch the two love birds interact.

You sat at the table, introducing yourself to them and them doing the same, and took in how the two acted. Vernon was right, it was like you were watching your best friend in another person’s body. If Seungkwan were dating someone, he would definitely be as affectionate as Min was. She really did radiate love and you couldn’t stand the way she looked at Chan as if he were the only person in the room. They made being in love look so good that you almost changed your stance on how you viewed love and relationships.

The date was mainly all small talk and the more you spoke with Min --Chan was basically invisible to you-- the more you spotted similarities between her and Seungkwan. “You two are the cutest, I can almost feel the love from across the table. Are you guys still in the honeymoon phase?”

Vernon raised his eyebrow at you and you gave him an innocent look. It would definitely ease your conscience knowing the couple you were about to break up were only dating for the slightest amount of time. That was until you got your answer that you were about to just up and leave the establishment.

Min giggled and Chan moved his arm around her shoulders as he answered, “I guess we are in the honeymoon phase. That is, if the honeymoon phase could last for 5 years. It was my 15th birthday when she asked me to be her boyfriend. It was cute because when we were both 12, we made a promise that we would start dating once we were both 15…”

His story trailed on for much longer but you tuned him out trying to think everything through. Were you really about to break up a 5— no, scratch that, an 8 year relationship?

It wasn’t until Vernon placed his arm around your shoulders that you were brought out of your thoughts. You were able to catch him halfway through his sentence and nod along to what he was saying.

“—I guess it could be three dates including yesterday but I’m not really sure… Actually the first time I was supposed to be meeting with a different girl but she cancelled so I’m not sure if the first one counts either. I don’t know, I guess we’re just seeing each other? Is there a label?” He looked down at you with questioning eyes and your heart dropped.

You looked over at the two and they smiled wide, probably excited for another couple to hang out with. You looked away from their expectant stares and back to the boy next to you.

“Uh… A label? We’ve only seen each other for three days, and I’m not even sure if today is considered a “thing”. Is a label really necessary?” You gulped out of nervousness but your mouth was so dry that it hardly did anything to ease your nerves.

It wasn’t until you heard a familiar voice calling your name that you looked up and saw Seungkwan standing at the table with a coffee in his hands. “I’ve been looking for you! Remember we have that thing later? We need to start getting ready soon! Let’s go!” He hurried you up and out of your seat, gave Vernon a small greeting and then a curt nod to Min and Chan before dragging you out of the cafe.

As you walked back to your dorm room with Seungkwan, he passed you the drink he had in his hands. You took and sipped it, tasting your regular order.

“Thanks,” you muttered to him.

“For what,” he scoffed jokingly, “the coffee or for saving your ass from that whole situation?”

“Both.”

He chuckled and linked arms with you, forcing you to walk a bit faster. To be honest, Seungkwan had no idea you would be on a double date and when he walked past and saw you and Vernon through the shop window, he went in hoping to do something petty. There you were, on a double date that looked like it was going so much better than the one he went on with you and Vernon just nights before. It wasn’t until he finally got your drink that he overheard your struggle and knew he had to get you out of there.

When you arrived at the dorms, he followed you in, knowing the two of you would end up hanging out anyways. As you hung your coat up, Seungkwan went straight to the couch to lie down. You soon joined him, sitting down at his feet and flicking on the tv.

“Why did you go on that date with Vernon? I mean, I know you like him but you literally freaked out when he asked about putting a label on your relationship.” He sat up to look at you and you didn’t respond, trying to get rid of the embarrassment bubbling back inside you. “Do you know how much I want that? I would literally kill for that.”

“Fine, kill me! then you can have him!” You let out in annoyance. Seungkwan’s eyes widened in surprise and then the two of you burst out into laughter. After a few minutes of laughter and a few tears of amusement, you were both calmed down enough to talk.

“I wasn’t really on a date with him. We were trying to find you someone to date,” you admitted.

“Oh really? Who were you thinking of setting me up with? The girl who clearly had a boyfriend or the boy that clearly had a girlfriend?” His tone was heavy with sarcasm and you couldn’t help but hesitate.

He gave you an expectant look, waiting for an answer until his eyes widened in shock. “Were you going to set me up with someone who was already in a relationship?!”

“No!” You were quick to defend yourself, “I was going to get her out of the relationship first and then set the two of you up.”

Seungkwan looked at you with an exasperated expression and shook you by your shoulders. “Do you realise how idiotic that sounds?! Did you hear that come out of your mouth just then?!”

You pushed his hands from your shoulders and pouted at him. His expression softened and you took that as your chance to speak. “I just, I don’t like seeing you sad. You were especially sad after the double date and I needed to make you happy.”

He could only sigh and pull you into a hug. He kissed your forehead and thanked you for how much you cared about him.

Seungkwan was truly touched by his best friend’s actions. He would just have to tell you off some other time.

After that stunt, there were no more mentions of love and relationships from Seungkwan. He was content knowing how much you cared for him. When you asked why he was so quiet on the topic he would say that the empty feeling he had in his heart was ‘temporarily filled up with his love for you’.

You and Vernon didn’t end up working out. You did end up apologising and asking him out again but after 5 more dates, you couldn’t handle it. You just couldn’t bring yourself to say yes when Vernon asked you to be his girlfriend. You let him down honestly, saying you did enjoy spending time with him but there was more self discovery that you needed to make before being with someone else.

Seungkwan was more than welcoming after hearing your voice over the phone. He opened the door and pulled you into a hug as you cried into his shoulder. His voice was soft and spoke words of comfort into your ear. You were heartbroken and it was completely your own fault but Seungkwan was able to make you forget that. He said it wasn’t anybody’s fault and that it just wasn’t your time.

For the second time, you woke up in bed with Seungkwan holding you reassuringly and you knew that there was a new sort of bond between you two. Instead of waking up feeling empty, you were awake with a new sort of foreign feeling, one that made your heart palpitate whenever you remembered your best friend comforting you, or when you could feel his arm snug around your waist, and especially when you looked up, caught his gaze and he smiled softly at you.

The idea that the two of you would never be apart was a crazy concept to the both of you. Best friends since birth all the way through to college. Life, however, always has different plans for everyone. Seungkwan had graduated top of his sector for his international business degree and received so many job offers from different companies across the globe.

While he was working overseas, you were back from college and in your hometown, working in your childhood primary school as a teacher. It was a job you loved and worked hard towards but with the hours that needed to be put in and the time difference between you and Seungkwan, the communication between you two had eventually died down.

There was no way you would have ever forgotten him. You were in your old hometown and surrounded by different memories of the two of you.

Years went by and you had your on and off relationships. As each relationship came and went, you were able to last longer. Your view on love changed and you were able to slowly open yourself up more and more to each partner. You were finally able to give love and not think too much about ending up miserable.

Another day at work was coming to a close and you rushed your children out of the classroom. You needed to pack your equipment quickly before you were late to your meetup. After years of not seeing him, you felt the butterflies flutter around in your stomach. There was no way you could contain your excitement as your smile spread permanently on your face.

“Well someone seems to be in a rush. Big day today?” A familiar voice rang throughout the classroom and your heart stopped. Your head turned and your gaze fell on Seungkwan leaning on the doorframe of the classroom with a bouquet of flowers in hand. You immediately stopped what you were doing and sprinted at full speed towards him, jumping into his arms and hugging him as tight as possible.

“Miss me?” He chuckled and gave you a quick peck to your cheek.

“Why are you here?!” You asked ecstatically.

Seungkwan gave you the flowers and explained, “I wanted to surprise you! If you knew I was coming here it wouldn’t be as fun.”

You went back to collect you bag and Seungkwan followed. “So…” he started, “What should we do now?”

As soon as he asked that, you froze. Seeing Seungkwan made you forget about everything, to the point where you forgot why you were so excited in the first place.

“Actually… I was going to meet with Vernon.”

Seungkwan’s heart sank and all he could do was let out a disappointed ‘oh’. He nodded slowly and stepped back. “Have you guys been seeing each other long?”

“Oh! No, it’s not like that! He was passing through town and wanted to catch up with me, see how things are.”

“I guess I should’ve called before coming then. Maybe I would’ve beat him to the punch huh?”

You placed your hand on Seungkwan’s shoulder sympathetically and then linked arms with him. “I guess since you’re so cut up about it, I’ll let you tag along.”

It was like a mini reunion meeting up with Vernon. Both Seungkwan and Vernon’s features had matured but you all acted like nothing had changed and you’d all been friends for ages, as if those years apart had never happened. The three of you hung out for hours and eventually had to say goodbye.

“I’ve gotta say,” Vernon looked at the two of you, “I was surprised to see the both of you come together. I thought it would just be the two of us.”

You laughed and apologised, “Sorry, I invited him. Why, was this supposed to be another date like old times?” You joked. Vernon let out another laugh and nodded, catching you off guard.

“I’m a little disappointed but seeing what a happy couple you two are, I just want to say that I’m happy for the both of you. After all the trouble you went through for him I guess it makes sense that you two ended up together.”

You all said your goodbyes and Vernon was off, leaving you and Seungkwan to head home. You invited him to stay over at you apartment and he happily agreed.

“Can you believe he thought we were together?” You spouted. Seungkwan smiled and shrugged as the two of you walked back to your apartment.

“Can you believe we aren’t together?” he retorted.

Your heart pounded at his words. The two of you graduated college with feelings left untouched and words left unsaid. You knew, nearing your college graduation, that you felt something for him but on his quest to find his true love, he had never once hinted that he might feel something for you too. You thought he only saw you as his best friend.

“Well… We haven’t spoken in almost 5 years, we’ve always only been best friends and we live thousands of miles apart. I think it’s pretty believable that we aren’t together.”

He grabbed your hand to stop you from walking and pulled you to face him, holding both your hands. He looked into your eyes and eventually spoke.

“I’m moving back. I’m coming home. My boss wants me to manage a branch over here.”

He rubbed the back of your hands with his thumbs and you almost melted. It wasn’t until you snapped yourself out of your trance that you pulled away from him. “Oh no buddy, I know what you’re doing. There’s no way that you’re suddenly into me after all those years we had a chance to be something. You’re trying to settle aren’t you?” your voice held an accusatory tone.

If Seungkwan hadn’t known you for most of your life, he’d definitely be offended.

“Jeez, you’d think after all these years you’d finally get over your fear of commitment.”

“I’m not scared of commitment, I just want what’s best for you and I know that I am not that.”

He scoffed and threw his arm over your shoulder as you continued to walk.

“Trust me when I say, you never know what you have until it’s gone. It was the most painful thing seeing how much you’ve grown and let people in and out of your life. I knew that I didn’t want to be someone you let out of your life. I want you to let me in as much as possible and I never want to leave.”

You got to your apartment building and looked back at him. You wouldn’t be his best friend if you didn’t know how to tell whenever he was lying and telling the truth, and in this moment, he had never been more truthful.

When you didn’t speak, he continued, “I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable but I know before I moved away, we were the closest we had ever been in that last year of college and that’s when I realised I was completely in love with you. I also knew you weren’t ready for a serious relationship, especially a long-distance one. But right now, the time is right— it’s never been more perfect and I’d be a damned fool if I didn’t take this chance to tell you that then, until now, I love you with my entire heart. Please, give me this chance to show you how much I love you and how perfect we are for each other.”

Tears flowed down your cheeks and Seungkwan lifted a hand to wipe them away. His eyes glistened and eventually tears fell when you nodded your head and quietly agreed.

He pulled you into one of his signature hugs and peppered kisses along the side of your face. You both pulled away from each other and once again, you were staring happily into each others eyes.

“Can I… Can I kiss you?” His eyes never left yours and you pulled him in. You both looked into each others eyes and let the kiss take you away, letting your eyes close as you both got more immersed in the action of love.

Seungkwan was a person of love. He longed to love and be loved.

You were a person wary of love. You needed someone to teach you how to love and be loved.

The two of you were the perfect pair.

whew im glad that’s over. is this my return to writing ?? who knows ?? definitely not me !! I tried my best to just spew this out and I stayed awake for over 24 hours (not completely doing this lol i had stuff to do) so it might not make complete sense. theres also the fact that i never edit my work but ykno who does amirite

This was the 6th installment of my fanfic trope showdown writing challenge (check out my ‘writing challenge’ tag or my masterlist to read the others) and hopefully i’ll shit the rest out real soon.

I’m workin on the next chapter of ‘LCAYF’ but theres also a chance I’ll upload some fluff because I like fluff, thats my shit.

anyways, don’t forget to like and reblog my master piece, check out my other works, send in a request and if you’re feeling real crazy, give this sad bitch a follow (the sad bitch is me)

#Thewritersnetwork #write-svt #my work #boo seungkwan #boo seungkwan oneshot #boo seungkwan one shot #boo seungkwan imagine #boo seungkwan imagines #boo seungkwan scenario #boo seungkwan scenarios #seventeen scenario #seventeen scenarios #seventeen imagine #seventeen imagines #seventeen oneshot #seventeen one shots #seventeen au #writing challenge

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whitewolfwave-blog · 6 years

Text

Friends >> b.b. x fem!reader

Word count: 2806

Rating: SFW

Synopsis: You're captured by a mysterious man. Unexpectedly, this goes far better than you could have anticipated, and in the end, you might even make a friend.

Notes: I'm getting fics and stuff done but I can't like ?? Finish everything in the order I want to, or find a pace at which to post what I want to post. Someone plz help

You didn't know where you were when you woke. You didn't even know when you'd passed out; all that you knew was that your mission was screwed thanks to some asshole who'd shown up to do the exact same thing you were supposed to do.

Your eyes darted around the room in search of any piece of evidence that would clue you in on your location. There was nothing; the room was padded with sound-proofing foam squares, nothing in it except for the cameras in the corners and the chair you were tied to. You tugged on the restraints around your wrists, but to no avail; they wouldn't budge. Unlike most of your colleagues, your "team," you weren't enhanced. Your wit and skill could only get you so far.

You turned toward a camera with a scowl, sticking your tongue out like a child. You doubted this would get a rise out of whoever was holding you, but hey, you were pissed. Relentlessly, you continued to pull at your restraints, grunts of frustration sounding throughout the room. Shock gripped you when a panel of the wall moved forward, and in stepped a man of large stature with long, brown hair that fell into his face. With him, he dragged a chair, turning it around and sitting on it backwards. You stilled, no longer trying to rip the restraints off. Confusion gripped you when you noticed that his left hand- the one on the chair- looked as if it was metal.

"Who the hell are you?" You spat.

"You don't need to know that, Miss Y/L/N. All you need to know is that I know you and that you are in some deep, deep shit. But, if you comply, I can get you out of it." The man's voice was smooth, his tone gentle yet firm enough to unsettle you. You wondered what other information he had on you.

"Comply to what?" You maintained an aggressive demeanor.

"I'm just going to ask you a few questions, alright?" You didn't answer. "What were you doing in that Hydra facility?"

"I don't know, probably the same shit that your stupid guy was doing-"

"Our guy? Do you seriously not remember what happened?" He chuckled, "I was expecting some anger, some guardedness, maybe even some fear, but I certainly wasn't expecting you to flat out not know me. Do you remember anything from your mission today, anything at all?"

"No, I clearly do not-"

"That's a shame."

"Stop interrupting me!" You raised your voice, though you were certainly in no position to do so. Your muscles tensed when the man's calm demeanor shifted.

"What were you doing?" He demanded through grit teeth, leaning towards you over the back of his chair. You vigorously shook your head, refusing to give up any information. "Miss Y/L/N, if you don't give me what I need, we'll find it in other ways. We don't need you alive."

"I'm not telling you a damn thing about the people I work for," you insisted. He nodded.

"Y/N, we took their tracking device out of your neck. You don't have to be afraid of them. We know."

"You... you know?" Your heart raced with the thought of the people who owned their organization, who owned you, finding out you'd escaped their grasp.

"Yes. We know. Now, I need you to tell me why you were there. I need you to cooperate. If you don't, things might get a little messy." In the corner of your eye, you caught the glint of a blade.

Tears threatening to spill over, a fear for your life taking over, you choked out, "I was there to assassinate a scientist- Dr. Fennhoff. Your guy was there to do the same thing when the fucking idiot knocked me out and prevented me from finishing the mission. Hydra probably knows we were there now and the next time your moronic guy goes back, it'll be quite a bit fucking harder to kill him- if I even live to see my next mission."

"There won't be a next mission," he explained, "Dr. Fennhoff is dead, and you're in good hands."

"What- how? Why are we here, then? Who killed him? Who's hands am I in?"

"We're on an airship, doll," he told you, shaking his head, "and I killed him. I'm the idiot you keep referring to. You'll see who soon enough."

"Oh." Blood rushed to your cheeks. "I'm uh, I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"Clearly," he smiled, an amused twinkle in his eye. "I'm not done questioning you, Miss Y/L/N. This won't take long, I promise."

He told the truth; the questioning, as opposed to the usual 4+ hours, was only roughly an hour and a half long.

"Thank you for your compliance, Y/N," he said softly, "I'll get you out of here as soon as I can." He turned to the door, looked at what you presumed to be a camera behind you, and nodded.

You heard clicks and shifts in the wall. Before he could step out, you cried, "Wait! Can you untie my hands, at least? Please?" He stood still for a moment, a smirk on his lips.

"You know, I like you," he laughed, "but not that much. Not yet." The man, who never told you his name, stepped out of the room, leaving you with endless curiosities.

Only a few minutes must have passed when the panel opened again, but this time, instead of your interrogator, the person in front of you was the one and only Tony Stark. He leaned against the wall, leaving the panel-door open, and stared you down.

"You made quite a mess, Y/N."

"H-how do you..." You trailed off. You'd given up on figuring out how they'd gotten so much information on you. Obviously, if Tony Stark was involved, the possibilities were endless. You weren't even sure if you wanted to find out anymore.

"Look, kid, we're interested in you."

"We?"

"No questions. Just listen, for now."

"Yes, sir, Mr. Stark."

"That show you put on back there, with Barnes, that was unbelievable. We'd like to see if you can do more."

"Barnes..." you said to yourself, the familiarity of the name irking you. "Who is that?"

"James Buchanan Barnes. Bucky Barnes, Winter Soldier. Whatever the kids are calling him these days." You choked on air when the man in front of you revealed who your captor was. I fought THE Winter Soldier and I... I didn't die.

You though that must have been why Tony, S.H.I.E.L.D., and the Avengers themselves were so interested in you; Barnes couldn't take you, a non-enhanced being, down in hand-to-hand combat. You'd come to find that the interest wasn't so new, after all.

A month after you woke from that drug-induced slumber in a holding cell on one of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s helicarriers, the Avengers had taken you in as one of their own. Natasha and Wanda sat on your bed as you recounted events from your childhood, stories from past relationships, listening intently to every word you had to say. For the first time since you were taken from your parents at only 5 years old, you had a family. You had people who wanted to know you, and everything about you. This team was nothing like the one you had before; it was far better.

One night, as you laid in Wanda's floor next to Natasha, listening to the young girl complain on her bed, the light filling the room flickered before surging, brighter than ever.

"I just- whoa, that's never happened in here before." The moment the words left Wanda's mouth, it happened again.

"What the hell?" Natasha grumbled, her head popping up from its place on the ground. Not even a minute later, the lightbulb casting light over Wanda's room exploded, shards of glass cascading down. "Fuck!" Natasha yelled, throwing her arms over her face and jumping from the ground.

You'd been facing the light when it happened, a fact that registered immediately when you felt hot blood trickling down your left cheek.

"Y/N, are you okay?!" Wanda exclaimed, rising from her bed to touch the place on your face where the shard of glass had been embedded. "How does that even happen?"

"I'm fine," you breathed, holding a hand under the line of blood. "We need to go see if everything and everyone is okay." The two agreed, allowing you to lead the way to the compound's 'breaker room' that actually consisted of technology so advanced that you'd never seen it before- just to keep the compound running. Tony Stark was certainly a frivolous man, something you'd come to learn about him in very little time.

"The, um, all of the lights are-" Natasha stumbled over her words, wondering how exactly she'd describe the situation.

"-out?" Wanda suggested, "Dead, maybe? I don't know what you'd call this, other than... well, weird."

It is weird, you thought, that a facility run by one of the most intelligent and wealthy men in the world would have a power surge that completely fucked the entire electrical grid. Something is going on, here.

You kept the thought to yourself; while you had trust and love in your heart for the friends you'd made, the part of you that was incapable of total trust remained. You simply shook your head. "Wanda," you said, "mind giving us a little light?"

"Sure."

The young girl's hands were enveloped in red, outlining the furniture as well as the walls in every hallway and room your trio passed through.

"Tony? Sam? Steve?" You called, praying for a response.

"Sorry to disappoint," a familiar voice rang out from around the corner, "but I think they're downstairs. Stark is trying to figure out what happened to the power." Wanda turned her hands towards the figure, causing only a slight stir of irritation in your chest when your eyes lit upon Bucky Barnes. The relationship you had with him, to say the least, was uncomfortable. Eventually, after he'd caught you in the Hydra facility, your memories came back. Remembering the fight was disturbing, in a way. When you saw him, all you could see was his look of murderous determination, his cold eyes, his lips turned downwards as he plunged a needle into your neck and your world went black.

Of course, you knew your luck; not many had encountered the Winter Solider and lived to tell the tale. He let you live. For that, you'd be forever grateful. Still, speaking to him gave you instinctual discomfort.

"Any idea what happened?" Nat was the first to speak, breaking the awkward silence.

"Nope. I'm just waiting it out."

"Great," you grumbled, "useless as always."

"We should split up," Wanda spoke over you, "the compound is large and it would take the four of us forever to find someone alone. Natasha and I will go to the north and west wings, Y/N and Bucky, go to the south and east wings."

"Why-" Bucky cut you off before you could even get a word out.

"Sounds good to me. Let's get goin', doll."

The only thing you'd managed to find out that, after the surge, the power was back on. After sweeping two floors, you and Bucky couldn't find anyone, much to your annoyance.

"We should have taken Wanda and Nat's wing," Bucky chuckled, pressing a button on the elevator.

"Guess so."

You tried your hardest to stay cold around him. He intimidated you, just a bit. You never quite knew how to act around him, for you were always scared to make a fool of yourself. As the elevator doors opened, he stepped to the side, permitting your entrance before his. Always a gentleman. Except for when he's kicking someone's ass and kidnapping them. You scoffed aloud at the thought, prompting Bucky to glance at you.

"What's up?"

"Nothing." Cold. Contained. The elevator doors closed, and as always, a feeling of panic set in. You hated tight spaces; the people you'd worked for before the team 'adopted' you were cold, even more so than the instructors of Natasha's childhood 'school,' the Red Room Academy. They would torture you, lock you in small closet-like rooms for days at a time, starving you and keeping you awake for hours on end. They needed you to be ruthless, emotionless, but through all of their efforts, you remained the person you were at your core. You kept your soul, something that many of the enhanced beings who they'd taken in couldn't do.

The organization seemed at first to be an outreach program for people like you. They'd take people in, love and nurture them for a few weeks, and once trust was gained, they would make sure you could never leave. The only time a person could leave the facility was for a mission. Thankfully, your first was your last. The Avengers rescued you; Bucky rescued you, a fact you often struggled to remind yourself of. You knew that his intentions were never to hurt you, but the feeling you got from looking into his eyes, the reminder of the pain he brought to you, was simply too much for you to bear. You didn't know if the Winter Soldier would ever be your friend.

You were pulled from your thoughts when the elevator stalled, causing you to grab on to a rail on one side. "What the fuck?" You hissed. The lights went out, and the elevator's movement halted completely. Suddenly, you felt as though you couldn't breathe. The darkness made it look like the walls were closing in on you. You choked as panic gripped you by the neck.

"Y/N? What's wrong?" Bucky stepped towards you, his brow twisted with concern. "Are you okay?"

"Stay back!" You yelled, your voice shaking, "Don't- don't hurt me!" A red light started flashing through the room, making the situation even worse.

His face fell as he realized how scared you were because of him. Bucky turned away, facing the wall. He had no idea what to do. He turned towards you once again, filled with distress when he saw that you were pressed into the corner of the elevator, cowering away from him. Without thought, he made his way to you, crouching so that the two of you were nearly level.

"Don't hurt me," you whimpered, hiding your face in the crook of your arm.

"I would never," he whispered softly. He grazed the outside of your arm with his flesh hand, hopeful that you'd look at him. You did; just a tiny peek. You didn't move any more than that or invite him to hold you, but your one eye held his gaze. His hand wrapped around your arm, gently tugging to see how you'd react.

Something in you triggered a wave of calm to flow through your body. Your arm relaxed as Bucky pulled you into his chest. You switched spots, his back in the corner. Yours was pressed against his chest as he rubbed circles into the nape of your neck in an attempt to calm you down. "Breathe, Y/N, just breathe. You're okay. I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm here. No one is going to hurt you."

"No one is going to hurt me," you shakily repeated, squeezing your eyes shut. Images of torture devices, the smell of blood clogging your senses, the red flashing lights, every single awful thing those people did to you was running a marathon through the lines of your brain. "No one is going to hurt me."

"That's right. You're okay." His hand migrated from your neck to waist as he pulled you closer. "You're safe."

"How-how do I stop thinking about it, Bucky?" It was one of the first times you addressed him by anything other than "Barnes," an action that wouldn't go unnoticed.

"Think about where you are now. You're in an elevator in one of the most secure places on Earth. It's stuck right now. That's all that's happening. You're in a stuck elevator. You're with a friend, now."

"We're... friends?" You asked. Happy to have found a distraction, Bucky chuckled.

"I would like for us to be. I don't think many enemies hold each other like this, so maybe we're on our way."

"Okay," you agreed, nodding with a minuscule smile on your face. "We can be friends, but I think we need to work some stuff out first."

"Deal."

Once you calmed down, Bucky still didn't move. He didn't want to until you gave the okay. He just held you, tracing shapes into your arms, determined to keep you comfortable. Eventually, you forgot about the red light, the instability, and you allowed your eyes to flutter shut.

#Bucky Barnes #MCU #mcu bucky #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes series

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haynr · 5 years

Text

all blog info below the cut,

apologies now to my mobile users

RULES

Before we interact you must…

have a properly displayed muse

have easily accessible posted information regarding your muse in a section or page

have easily accessible posted rules / guidelines in a section or page

for AU’s, you must have posted information regarding your muse within the fandom universe in its own section or page

make sure I am following you

cut threads

I Won’t

roleplay sex, generally. there may be a few exceptions, but keep the standard that i probably won’t. sexual content, perhaps, if all muns involved are over 18. If we do, it is with the understanding muses involved will be aged up appropriately.

tolerate any sexual advances toward myself ooc

roleplay inserts

always follow back, nor will I follow personals

tolerate pressuring, be it to rp in general or consistent pestering to answer threads

answer everything in my inbox. It’s not often I ignore asks, but I won’t answer something if it violates my rules. If I have difficulty answering something, I will privately message senders or make public inquires about anonymous messages.

follow everyone back / interact with everyone, even if you technically follow all my rules. i’m selective.

Please Don’t:

reblog meme asks. I don’t mind this so much, but it keeps things cleaner when they’re moved to a new post.

reblog inbox answers for non starter memes. examples would be mun opinions and the like but extend to headcanons and other writing. violators will be asked to delete the post and may be blocked.

reblog threads you are not a part of. warnings will be given to violating rp blogs, but personals will be instantly blocked.

reblog personal posts, especial images of myself. violators will be instantly blocked. this means anything tagged ooc.

force ships with me. I am a p easy going shipper, but I will be a bit more restrictive with Hayner. most of it has to do with his muse in general. he’s not thinking about romance atm. if it comes up in plot, great. if it doesn’t, you’re more than welcome to put it forward, but please do not expect me to go along with it. on that note, don’t expect me to always agree with your interpretations of my muse in ships. ideas and suggestions are fine, your own take is fine, but i cannot stress enough, please do not push hcs.

I am open to

multiple threads

duplicates of other muses (i do not rp duplicates of my own muse, but I usually have other muses in the fandom which I will be more than happy to interact with there, no twins etc)

shipping, though I will be highly selective, possibly exclusive. I will not instant ship, but I don’t mind developing our muses’ relationship privately over DMs.

mutli verse and/or polyshipping as befits all the muses and muns involved

rping toxic relationships of any sort, will be tagged accordingly and placed under cuts.

angst and/or triggering threads, though I would prefer to discuss the thread and tagging beforehand

crack threads

select AUs

ask/tagged initiated threads/starters but I ask for some warning if they are not from a meme or other prompt

responses of any length, so long as it is enough to reasonably work with for the pace of our thread

group threads

generally questionable plots. regardless of whether or not I approve of such practices ooc isn’t usually relevant. this is fictional, exploration of an idea– not a real-world execution of that idea. Feel free to DM for details.

Please Also Note:

I do not require length to be matched and may not always match partner’s length. I will respond as much as I feel I am able to or that I feel is necessary.

If my response is inadequate, difficult to respond to, or otherwise distasteful, FEEL FREE to ask me to redo my response.

Understand that my selectivity will depend on my comfort level and that I am not obligated to explain myself.

I tag all my threads as “thread”

I tag my partner’s url

if partner’s url changes, I will tag both old and new urls for the first response then only the new url going forward.

I generally tag triggers as “trigger tw”. same with general cw’s. i’m not the best with tagging, so let me know if I should watch for stuff in particular

my activity is generally a joke, but I’m constantly lurking, so feel free to drop a message

I am incredibly anxious. It doesn’t matter if we have late night conversations for like a month straight i will still be afraid to talk to you every. single. time. so always feel free to come whack me on the head or smth

while I can be very laid back / crack-ish, I do prefer to explore darker themes and my thread responses are much more serious than I come off as.

Blacklisted / Ask to Tag:

food

nsfw (for general safe scrolling, just let me know what your tag is since t simply wont show not safe for wombats content anymore)

“little space” related

“daddy,” “mommy,” etc

literally anything in this vein. in the vaguest, most removed sense. idc what you tag it. either let me know or just tag it “jade don’t look” whatever.

in fact feel free to tag any and all of these as just “jade don’t look” or some variant.

a/o/b related

anything pregnancy related

vivid depiction of sensory / memory alteration (particularly in images, but not excluded to)

unreality (also especially, but not limited to, images)

Of course I can’t require people tag these, but I will most likely not follow you if your post these regularly and do not have some warning which will be picked up by blacklist applications.

In regards to the sensory alteration, I mean things like seeing/hearing/etc things that aren’t there, mis-remembering or outright tampering with memory, etc. It’s kind of situation to situation on what gets me, but when it does it tends to hit me pretty hard. If you have any questions about it, fire away! [ example text post ]

On unreality, this somewhat relates to the above, I use this as a catch all phrase for images, vivid descriptions, and most especially videos/gifs of things that basically don’t behave or seem to behave as they should. Sometimes, I’ve seen these things tagged as “trippy” and the like, but they those posts tend to be too…idk how to put it. Extra? What tends to get me is when things are going fairly linear and then suddenly go for a loop. That’s not the greatest description, but here’s a few posts that have triggered me the worst that I’ve slowly gotten used to. There are also things which should seem fine or normal but aren’t. If anyone has a better description for this, by all means let me know! example posts [ one ] / [ two ] / [ three ] + a weird image that also gets me for some reason. hmvent is actually a blog I use to store things that trigger me so I can slowly get used to them or try and figure out what it is / why these things get to me.

META

Hayner is a young lad who resides in the sleepy Twilight Town. He is described as “impulsive and determined, and is always looking for a new adventure. He is bold to the point of recklessness…He gets bored easily during uneventful times… also easily angered/irked…thirsts for some kind of recognition…” During the events of KHII, he is 15, the same as Roxas/Sora. He has deep brown eyes, dirty blond hair and is a bit tall and, while still skinny, muscular for his age. He is the leader of his quartet trio including Pence, Olette and Roxas himself.

While he does have parents, he’s rather distant from them. While he does receive support from his folks, they were just never really there. Because of this, his loyalties lie greatly with his chosen family, his friends. He considers it his duty to help, lead and, if needed, protect them, even if he’d never admit as much even to himself. If any of his actions or ideas end up hurting someone he cares about, he takes it very much to heart, often beating himself up about it for weeks and weeks after.

Hayner, despite his hotheadedness and brashness, is a very observant leader. His tough guy act, while not entirely based on this, is partially to build himself up, make other less inclined to pick fights with him and his friends. Whether or not this works out, however, is certainly debatable. He also does his best to incorporate his friends’ wants and needs– or at least what he perceives these as– into his plans.

As oblivious as he may seem, he is quite mindful of the people around him. Whether it’s picking out the shady figure on that street corner or this one, or noticing some random kid’s not having a good day - he sees a lot of it, but often it doesn’t strike as a huge priority. He thinks things through a lot more than he’s credited for, but unfortunately, he doesn’t go through the whole process before starting his plan of action.

Hayner also isn’t exactly the most social person. He is outgoing and nice to people out of politeness and giving people the benefit of the doubt, but as a whole he’d much rather just stick with his friends. The only exception to this has been Sora, as he feels a “familiar vibe” about him, and therefore is also open to his circle of friends.

A couple more misc hcs below:

Is a very exceptional swordsman (at least with the training swords). However, his skills do not seem as outstanding compared to that of Roxas and other more major characters.

As much as he hates school, his best subject science. And although one would think he’d be a good athlete because he is competitive, he actually doesn’t have good PE grades because he doesn’t try if he doesn’t have to. The only way to get him to really participate is to make it a competition.

MORE WILL BE ADDED MARCH, 2019 TO INCLUDE SPOILERS FOR KH3

AU Info will be added shortly.

#mobile rules #about blog #psa

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maneaterwithtail · 4 years

Video

youtube

Why the resistance to "fan girl" Ms. Marvel?

highlights of the discussion

Popesize1 day ago (edited)

For me, i guess it was the overexposure, and you must like her-attitude, that made me say no. Same with Captain Marvel as the new flagship. Her origin and faith never really mattered to me. I remember finding Dust in one of the young x-team (was it Hellions?) interesting. The obsessive nerd and fan-girling was a bit annoying, i can agree on that. Mostly because the fans i have come to know, never really behaved like that. But it might be more common with girls. What do i know? -But never the big tick-off

Dakina Demino1 day ago

I don't think its the character itself, but rather the relentless media worship of her as some kind of new age comic book Jesus that really took off five years ago. If you said anything that the pros and the media took as negative, you'd get called the usual things like nazi, racist and so on. You'd also get bot blocked on twitter and smeared in a closed community chat room. This has the side effect of reflecting back on Kamala who gets the reputation of being a progressive garbage character. A second point is that less than a year ago, the pros and media were still running smear campaigns against their own consumer bases, painting them as some vast army of zombie nazi kkk Trump voting hate mob made up of Russian cyber bots that wants to gun down immigrants. Kamala is polarizing in that game as she represents two things a lot of Marvel fans hate. One they got attacked by people claiming they are evil, anti minority, gate keeping old white fans and two, the character represents the catalyst of Marvel telling its own consumer base to f**k off in more of less that precise wording. As for me, I'm not angry at Kamala. I'm pissed off that an awesome cyperpunk game series like Dues Ex got axed so the studio could make a game that seems designed from the ground up to start shit and trigger outrage.

Nioh Arcadia1 day ago

As the Target Audience for Kamala I want to like her but (as of right now) I really fucking hate her 😡 She feels like the living embodiment of a subreddit and after G Willow she's Only written as a hyper Melenial 😒. Also like you said she feels like "hey you can see yourself can't you nerd?" It's pretty insulting and lazy. Also her being a mage fan of other Superheros makes her character less interesting because she lacks her own Agency. Now-a-days she's pretty boring and I or anyone else really couldn't give a shit

Raheil Rahman1 day ago

As a Muslim, the comic was groundbreaking. Grant Morrison's "Vinamarama" was the first book that spoke to my experience in my lifetime, but this was a pop extension of that. Her family life, her need to hide her identity from her conservative family, was a great update on Peter Parker. She was a nerdy fangirl, which was fun, and she was a very bubbly and enthusiastic character, which I found entertaining. For a time.

I was turned off by the comic due to the very decompressed pace (obviously to pad a story and sell more issues) and the constant reboots. I haven't read the issues later when she was pushed into Avengers, but that's because all Marvel and DC comics are wearing thin with me. It's all reboots and re-mixes of familiar characters to push some marketing that has nothing to do with comics. I agree with [Comics, by Perch] on this.

Kamala Khan was forced down the fans throats, but there were many fans of her that have nothing to do with her comics (which is the future of all IPs in this business, I think). The market isn't for comics, which I get is your focus, but she was made to be bigger than comics, like or not.

But I don't care, because Kamala Khan has allowed all of us to know and discuss things and issues that we have never done before. Particularly, the arc where they discuss Partition, the division of India into Pakistan and Bangledesh, a tragic event that my father experienced personally, was worth all the over-exposure of this character alone. This was a huge historical event that almost no one has heard of, and this book put a focus on it even among older people of the sub-continent who had never read a comic in their lives, the pages were being shared by email and on Facebook by people my father and mother's age.

Did it sell the comic? Hell no.

But it was a good thing for the comic world, for the Pakistani world, for the American fans, on a whole.

And to be honest Perch, I love your channel, but this very rant plays into the idea OG fans will reject this new character based on her background. Many people say her powers are boring, her character is mediocre, and they're all right, but they, and you, miss the point. I get she's been pushed down our throats and I agree that she isn't the best, but the fact that you relate to the kid who acts like a jerk, saying he represents the average comic fan (I don't relate to him, I relate to her, which might be the point of what I'm saying), while that scene is an over-exaggeration, like all superhero melodrama is, I have experienced exactly that kind of situation, being talked down to, and I've seen this happen a lot when it is a young girl and especially if it is a person of color. The fact this irks you is acceptable, but I see a lot of truth in it, even if it is over the top soap opera dialogue.

I know you are going to say that you were only discussing how the industry, the fans of comics themselves reacted to it and her forcibly increased profile in the universe of comics, and as a fan of comics for almost 30 years, I see all your points. But I think you're reaction is an over-reaction, Kamala Khan is a small part of the Marvel universe, and if she is being artificially being pushed to the top, I personally, have no problem with that. I don't buy the comics, and no one else has to either. And if her inclusion in comics causes people to stop buying the comic, well, I have no problem with that either. Honestly, a lot of those books were never going to be bought no matter which version of Captain Marvel or Spider-Man you put into the book.

you know nothing jon snowden1 day ago (edited)

It is somewhat insulting the bullying of her as some sort of crucial element of her origin. “What’s her pathos?” “Oppression from comicbook nerds.”

Eric D.1 day ago

Two of the best marvel titles - Daredevil and Immortal Hulk - have one very important thing in common. Consistent creative teams that are telling good stories within a larger story arc that is being told simultaneously. The issue with Kamala Khan is the same issue that Marvel has with a lot of their characters - creative teams on a revolving door and overuse of cross over events. In that shuffle, the core of a character gets lost and we end up with flat, uninteresting characters exactly like the version of Ms. Marvel that's presented in the new Avengers game. A lot of the "problems" in comics could be corrected if the industry returned to a consistent creative team model instead of this six-issue-expiration-date on creative teams and constant title cancelations and reboots that we see now.

KelpieTales1 day ago

Pretty much what others have said before: Kamala has/had potential, her concept is solid and has been done elsewhere so it can work, her early series wasn't bad but come Civil War II things started going downhill for her sadly especially with politics becoming all the more obvious of a driving force.

What didn't also help was overexposure and the "You must love her or else!" Mentality behind her marketing and some fans as well being directly tied into two other franchises with the same problem: Carol Danvers as Captain Marvel and the Inhumans being made into knock-off X-Men. Since Disney got the rights to X-Men and shelves the Inhumans after the damage done to them I can see why they're quiet on Kamala being one. You also got a point on her surface traits being over exaggerated by other writers most specifically her being a Muslim and a Fangirl, with the rest kind of varying. One example is Waid's version of her is known for being so upset with how the Avengers wouldn't personally rebuild buildings destroyed in battle she left to form the Champions. First issue of her new series by Ahmed had her accidentally destroy a store and came off bratty to the justifiably angry owner. Some will see it as writers not doing their research which sadly happens quite a bit or worst case the character seen as a hypocrite to some especially if they're a fairly new characters with other factors going against them. One thing that personally bothers me about her is how Marvel and certain media praise her as their "best thing since Spider-Man" when she hasn't really done much to earn that title in terms of personal accomplishments. She's made from a similar mold as Peter and there's nothing wrong with doing that kind of "ordinary kid becomes a superhero" with a different cultural twist to it but it felt like they handled Kamala (and other modern hyped, young characters) with kid gloves compared to their predecessors. I don't think she should see all her loved ones murdered in front of her but maybe at least building a rogues gallery that challenges her more other than simply "fascism" and "Islamaphobia" or something. Then again, this could be because her writers are afraid of getting called "bigots" if something bad happens to her even if it's something white guys routinely deal with I.e. recent Star Wars comic had Boba Fett kill a black woman, just like he killed so many others before, and suddenly SWHatesWomen is a trending tag. Kamala's books also seem more geared to a YA for nerd girls and maybe younger like other books out there like Squirrel Girl so I can see that as a rift between her series and the usual comic fanbase that tends to be teen boys and men.

Also, no qualms about the costume but I get how stretchy powers can be a little weird for some to get over or have a character be fun and creative with it.

Also, that scene with the "real fans" bullies was eye roll worthy. I'm not denying fan elitism exists and I've seen it first hand from people of all walks of life. However, here it feels like it plays into the narrative of "fanboys are bigots who hate sharing their hobbies with girls/PoC/LGBT+" and of course, if you don't like characters like Kamala for any reason you're just like them. There's also how a lot of comic fans tend to just be super awkward, or even autistic, and just get carried away talking about their hobby while unintentionally coming off rude. I'll admit I've been there trying to talk to someone who acted like an authority on the comics when they didn't seem to ever read them and seemed to just watch the shows (while ironically talking down about others who watch superhero shows and don't read the books). Not to mention, the concern of hobbies being re-tooled to be more "inclusive" for people who never cared about them before while alienating the older fanbase.

Gabriel Hernandez1 day ago

Here's an anecdote that somewhat backs up your theory. Disney XD came out with Black Panther's Quest just after the release of the film. I remember hearing about it and thought it would be some light, fun entertainment. When the first episode came out (you can legit watch it here: https://youtu.be/0B9JOAX99pc), Ms. Marvel had as much dialog as Black Panther, certainly more than any other Avenger, and she was at the front of the team during the big fight scene in the first 5 minutes. I remember thinking "Why is this person here? Why is she getting so much attention in a Black Panther cartoon? Where's the Hulk? Why is Ms Marvel doing so much of the talking and in the same timeframe you have nothing from either Capt. America or Black Widow? What is this?" In other words, Ms Marvel was being shoved to the front and treated as a co-leader of the Avengers when - and here's the key - her canon and her powers weren't established enough to earn that spot. That's the difference. She didn't earn her place at the table, and it just comes off as forced and fake. Just my opinion.

Cole1 day ago

When I was in Washington DC last summer we visited American History Smithsonian and they unexpectedly had an exhibit on superheroes where they had some comics in a case and there was a Kamala khan Ms Marvel #1 next to a bunch of classic issues and first appearances. It puts things into perspective beyond a small internet troll bubble. That clip was kinda lame lol but the character has a large audience.

Ibena8271 day ago (edited)

I do disagree on the idea that people weren't ranting about her character when she first debut because they're were literal blogs and videos dedicated to bashing her character and her faith, and even those people who claim her comic was failing always forget to mention that while single issues weren't selling alot, her first volume actually sold remarkably well, making it the best selling series in that year. Although her character came from the all new and all different line-up there is a reason why unlike others like Riri Williams, America Chavez or even Nova she was able to go into other media so easily and it's simply because her character was able to appeal to new readers of comics with a young protagonist who held a more optimistic outlook on the Marvel universe as it was going into so much change at the time, it also helped that her story focus less on action and more on her daily life and how it involves into her heroic life. I could understand if people just don't like Ms. Marvel because she's just not their favorite type of hero but it would be weird to criticize the character for being comparable to her multiple relaunches "mentor" or with her being responsible for the decline of Marvel comics

Comics, by Perch1 day ago

I didn't say there were none... but if you look at the volume it was easily 1/20th of the volume of what occurred later in her run. For a period of time there were more articles condemning the insults than the insults themselves. Of course, that did change.

Horizon Brave1 day ago (edited)

I despise...DESPISE the fandom at times... This shouldn't even be a thing... I can guarantee you...promise you.... if Captain Marvel was not a teen girl, this conversation, this "agenda" that everyone spouts, this constant push back of anything about this character would not exist. Find it funny that all of the characters that create controversy and and bring out the cliche descriptors like SJW and MarySue are all women. I have yet to hear anyone whine and bitch about male characters 'ruining' the story or pushing politics etc

inotaishu11 day ago

Ms. Marvel wasn't even the first muslim girl in the Marvel Universe. DUST came years before her. I think the problem with the character is that she was so long connected to something that looks like an agenda instead of having the character stand on her own.

Once upon a time there was a online conflict called gamergate

it was an outgrowth of the increased mainstreamification with it greater demographic Alteration of fandom. Where they were a vehicle for major studios putting things out as well as trying to chase different demographics and markets.

alongside this is in fact a long-term attempt to make fandom much more female friendly. with, yes, pre-existing issues of sexism. With the sudden influx of this social capital some factions happily hook their train up either for validation, advancement, but especially social power. This all comes to a head through three major actions.

you probably heard names like Zoe Quinn or Anita Sarkeesian. needless to say fandom isn't just one thing.

Stuff that happens in the game sphere creates an attitude because there are members who share multiple hobbies but especially with comics people wanted to act like they were social activists and one way they did that was by creating the bunch of traits that they knew what piss people off and then attack a group that they knew had less social capital.

so in order to combat what was perceived as negative feelings for Muslims and girls with interest in geeky hobbies and or science fiction they created the polemic fangirl. Especially to the counter the nasty statements against then popular brown hair girls such as Bella Swan and Katniss Everdeen.

This was addressing a very real issue, much as was pointed out in the book Lovecraft Country

We had genre fiction that had, on its basis, racist assumptions ideas and so on whether that was Tarzan, John Carter of Mars, and yes Lovecraft. but much like the creation of Miles Morales and several other characters you couldn't help but feel, much as you noted with this latest version, that the point of the character wasn't to be a character to celebrate and build a relationship with audience and this genre, but to brow beat the audience.

This is especially with fangirl interests being lionized as a social good even when in many ways just as venal Petty and low-key messed up. Something that nobody would own up to until it was socially advantaged to do so.

As an example people constantly pointing out how mean male nerds are to female or anything that's associated with female or progressive or gay fashions. Until suddenly they want to beat on those people then suddenly they can acknowledge the exact same traits those accused bigots with people were mad about as existing let alone allowing to be judged as flawed It's hilarious because I can point to things like people flipping out about the last Jedi and how people jump the gun on a character like admiral holdo. But then turn around and prosecute the in their name reylo fandom because they're all fighting against patriarchy. In short it's very clear when someone makes a character and they're meant to be a learning lesson for the audience

. And very deliberately from conception that was the point of Miles Morales and Kamala Khan. The only positive thing you could say at least with KK is that she was deliberately meant to be empathetic to that kind of girl. the problem is much like [Perch] said when they start saying she was the future it very much came with an implicit “you guys are the past and you guys sucked until we came here”

It's with this attitude along with that, even though I don't have a problem reading the first three or so of her trade, she's associated with the push of the inhumans which was very much more mandated by the fox marvel Disney pissing match; To the fact that she has Loki guest star along with agents of shield thus meaning that she was very much part of the then media tie in and fangirl gasm of pushing Loki which also fed into the idea of Loki as the best queer boyfriend; and they made it clear that this was going to be the future. basically they were going to be as Petty as they always were just aiming towards fangirl. as opposed to males’ preference

and then they were going to tell us how we were monsters for not going along with it.

And again those first three trades pretty well written and okay ish. They're all about character. which makes them kind of interesting but that doesn't change the fact that you can easily see what they're trying to do with having the literal villain called the inventor who's also Thomas Edison who's all about demoralizing and exploiting the younger generation, who all turn out to be super geniuses anyway, All this and a wolverine cameo.

Added in like [Perch] noted that people who were not about comics couldn't shut up about praising her as the future of comics as if everything was crap until she showed up and it just hurt a lot. especially as you noted it was all this other mess going on but she was part of the initiative of streamlining marvel towards the media Disney push. and very deliberately made in order to push out everybody who would come before even down to the likes of the audience to push for a different audience who they said was a more moral audience

So whether she was a hit outside of the morass of Marvel determined whether she’d be the new centralizing focus for it.

#comicsgate #ms. Marvel #why we 'hate' diversity #why many love it #comment highlights

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jeichanhaka · 4 years

Text

The Robbed That Smiles

Chapter Three

“The Infinity Stones? The parallel universe this woman claims to be from was devastated by someone using the stones?” Wong muttered, repeating what Strange had just told him but in question form, the result of being befuddled by it. Not the idea of multiple universes - his years of learning from the Ancient One about magic and different dimensions had long dispelled any disbelief of the Multiverse. Nor the thought that the Infinity Stones could be used for such destruction and evil - they were after all extremely powerful, and power was always tempting to those not wise enough to resist its pull. Even the wisest sometimes gave in. (Like the Ancient One’s use of magic from the Dark Dimension.) What befuddled him was difficult to pin down, more complex than the separate ideas.

“It appears that is the case.” Strange replied, skim reading through a book of old and powerful protective spells. After Lokki’s shocking revelation to Banner and Loki, after which she refused to answer any more questions, Banner had called back the other Avengers. (It irked Strange to find out that, contrary to what he’d first thought upon seeing through Lokki’s illusion, he had fallen for the goddess’ trick. That Loki was the only one not to fall for the layered trick, did little to lessen the doctor’s annoyance, and had instead increased it.) To make up for it, he was determined to protect all the Infinity Stones currently in the Avengers’ possession.

“You believe her? This female version of Loki?” Asked Wong, following Strange as the other man finished with one book and picked up another. “The god of lies?”

“There’s few reasons to doubt her, and every reason not to.” The surgeon-turned-sorcerer replied, putting back the tome he’d just picked up and meeting Wong’s gaze. “The stones are too dangerous not to believe Miss Lokki’s claim. Because if someone’s devastated her universe with them, then there’s probably someone in ours who’d do likewise.”

Wong drew in a breath, then nodded in understanding. “The person who’s been manipulating events over the past few years to draw out the stones, according to Thor. That person or entity or whatever - they want to use the Stones the same way.”

“It’s likely.” Strange skim-read through another book, this one dealing with various spells and incantations, mostly psionic in nature. Though there were mystic and entropic ones as well. It even included a section about truth and other interrogative spells. “I’ll find out more when I question Miss Lokki. There is the possibility that our universe is different enough from hers that we are not in such danger. But I don’t hold much hope for that. The Infinity Stones do exist in our universe.”

Wong didn’t reply and only nodded, agreeing with his fellow wizard. Before either man could say anything further, Strange’s cell phone beeped, the text-tone one the surgeon-wizard assigned to those from Stark’s number.

“...Thor and Natasha are on their way with Miss Lokki.” Strange commented aloud after reading the message, slightly curious. Not about the female Jotunn being brought to the Sanctum - until Stark managed to reinforce the walls and floors at his containment facility to withstand colder temperatures, it was agreed that Lokki would be transported to the New York Sanctum for interrogation and holding. There she could be restrained by Strange and the other Sanctum sorcerers if she tried escaping, without causing too much trouble.

“I thought Thor’s brother was also to come along, to make sure Miss Lokki didn’t use illusion magic to escape?”

“Apparently there were some issues and…” There was another beep indicating a new text, which Strange opened and immediately cocked an eyebrow. It was a snippet of video sent with an accompanying caption, underlying what the 25 seconds of film conveyed in Stark’s brand of banter. “‘Reindeer Games 2’ pwning ‘Reindeer Games 1.’” The wizard read Stark’s text verbatim after hitting play on the clip, his mouth twitched with amusement as he watched Lokki suddenly kneeing Loki when the latter Jotunn was talking with Thor. A string of foul language - both English and Asgardian by the sound - from Loki followed.

“...ooh.” Wong, peeking at the video clip, cringed as it finished and auto-repeated, feeling the reflective empathy any guy who’d ever got kneed between the legs felt when seeing it happen to another. “...that’s gotta have hurt.”

“Yeah.” Agreed Strange, while watching the clip again, his focus less on the pwnage and more on the reaction and glares between the two Lokis. It was obvious that Loki had midway through his swath of swearing moved to retaliate, even summoning a dagger, but had stopped. The human wizard frowned.

Thor’s knocking on the Sanctum’s entrance interrupted, drawing both wizards’ attentions from the video clip. Wong hurried downstairs to usher in their guests, while Strange pocketed his phone and placed the book of interrogative magicks back on the shelf. Afterwards he cast a spell on the floor, reinforcing it against any magic the female Jotunn may use. The room Lokki would be lodging in had already been so prepped.

“Upstairs, to the right. First open door.”

“Got it. Thanks.” Thor said to Wong as the sorcerer led him, Natasha, and Lokki up to the Sanctum’s private library.

“Good evening.” Welcomed Strange as he exited into the hall, eyeing his guests, especially Lokki. The frost giantess was sandwiched between her two escorts, Thor on her right holding her upper arm firmly, and Natasha on her left, holding just as tightly to Lokki’s wrist. Both Avengers appeared annoyed.

“L….”

“Stark already messaged me.” Strange interrupted. “Said your brother was...indisposed and couldn’t make it.” The wizard noted the smug grin Lokki gave when hearing about the mischief god and the comeuppance she’d given him. He also noticed the seidr-binding magic around her wrists, a temporary restraining measure he sensed was Loki’s payback for his female doppelganger’s assault.

“Yeah.” Thor grumbled, annoyed; many thoughts going through his head. He, as with Stark and the other Avengers, had been gobsmacked by Lokki’s sudden attack on his brother. Him even more so, because while Stark and Banner may have been too far away to know it, Thor had been talking with Loki. The mischief god hadn’t done anything or said anything to prompt the female Jotunn to knee him. “Should I bring Sis to her chamber or are you planning to question her tonight?”

“Questioning first.” Strange replied, not missing the quick glance Lokki gave Thor when the Asgardian referred to her as his sister. Thanks to his photographic memory and keen mind he deduced it to be a confused glance, and he felt his curiosity about the mischievous goddess increase.

“Can’t I have some refreshments first? I’m famished.” Lokki asked, her tone not reflecting any acknowledgment of Thor’s or Natasha’s annoyance.

“You had food at the tower.” Natasha snapped, letting go of the goddess’ wrist after Strange cast a stronger magic-silencing spell on the Jotunn sorceress.

“You call that greasy and heavily salted abomination food?!?” Lokki gaped at the red haired assassin, appalled. “It wasn’t even fit for a dog!”

“Sister, you’re the one who wanted fish n chips.” Thor groaned, reminding the jotunn that she’d requested - actually demanded - the Midgardian meal consisting of deep fried potatoes and battered fish. It had been the first thing, since her revelation about the Infinity Stones earlier that afternoon, that she had said. And thus Thor, feeling responsible for his adoptive sister from another universe, had asked his fellow Avengers to get the meal for Lokki.

“I’m n….” Lokki grimaced, her sea-hued gaze glaring at Thor, her hands resting over her stomach and smoothing out her shirt. (The same green tunic and black slacks outfit Loki had seidr summoned for her after dispelling her basilisk spider shape-shifting spell.) “I didn’t know you were going to get it from what has to be the worst Midgardian kitchen. I’d rather have a hamburger from one of their fast food thingamabobs.”

“Thing-a…what? You mean restaurant.” Thor corrected, earning him a smoldering glare from Lokki, whose cheeks slightly pinked.

“Thingamabob is a legit Midgardian word, you…”

“All right. All right.” Strange interrupted the Jotunn sorceress, his eyes locked on the magic silencing binds he’d placed on Lokki. Despite it being virtually impossible, the sorceress had subconsciously started straining them, her irritability nipping away at the magic binds. Hiding his alarm, Strange stepped forward, addressing Lokki. “I’ll see about getting you something to eat, Miss Lokki. Thor, you and Natasha can go, Wong and I can handle your sister.”

“See? At least someone here’s decent.” Lokki jabbed, crossing her arms and turning her back to both non-sorcerers.

Thor rubbed his temples, a headache forming there, while beside him Natasha rolled her eyes and started down the stairs. The thunder god soon followed, both of them done with the Jotunn sorceress’ attitude. After the two left, Strange turned toward Lokki and motioned towards the library.

The mischief goddess simply glanced through the doorway, noticing the magical reinforcements arrayed around the room and on the floor. “...going right into it, huh?” She sighed, referring to her soon-to-happen interrogation. “What about getting me some sustenance? I don’t tend to be agreeable on an empty stomach.”

‘Are you ever?’ Thought Strange to himself, before preparing to simply portal Lokki into the library. The Jotunn surprised him by quickly entering the room without any further complaint or comment, except for snapping a ‘I’m going, alright?’ after realizing what he was about to do. As she walked by him (he was standing closer to the library door than her, despite her being a foot or so further down the upper corridor), he glanced her over. He immediately noted that his magic-dampening spell, despite being strained by Lokki’s frost magic minutes earlier, was once again at full strength.

‘That’s a relief,’ he thought as he watched the Jotunn sorceress smooth out the front of her tunic again while waiting for him to follow, her hands lingering over her abdomen. Resting them there a few moments longer than necessary to smooth out the fabric, while a hint of a softened smile tugged at her lips. So brief Strange almost missed it.

For some reason it made him pause, and he thought of the video clip Stark had sent. In it, their Loki had been about to retaliate against the new Lokki but had stopped and instead stalked off. A reversal that happened seconds after the mischief god met the goddess’ glare and noted her hand resting deliberately on her stomach.

Strange’s eyes narrowed, realizing the look and gesture for what it was - a nonverbal spat between Loki and Lokki, in which the latter had dared the other to retaliate. Only to stop the god of mischief with a most innocuous gesture. Not a very threatening move but their Loki had immediately backed off.

That made little sense. Strange didn’t care if the two Lokis were aliens, simply placing a hand on one’s abdomen wasn’t threatening. Not in the slightest.

‘Neither is aiming for the stomach of the person holding a knife to your throat.’ The wizard muttered quietly as he thought of Banner’s description of his and Loki’s recapture of the female Jotunn. Perplexed by the reversal, and suspicious that it was a ploy of some kind, Banner had told his fellow Avengers exactly what had transpired. Including how Loki had seemed apologetic to his female doppelganger immediately after. ‘Unless….’

Strange stiffened and his brow furrowed, the spark of a possible explanation clicking in his brain.

“Wong.” Strange called out to his friend and fellow Sanctum wizard. “See about getting something to eat for our guest, something healthy. Takeout or delivery.” He said, handing the sorcerer some cash while saying thanks. The next moment he passed the library threshold and approached Lokki, who stood in the center of the front part of the library. The goddess appeared calm, but Strange noted the minor hints of tiredness. With a gesture he summoned and placed a chair beside the frost giantess. “You should sit.”

“I….” Lokki glanced at the chair, then at Strange, a crease forming in the space between her eyebrows. It wasn’t the start to the type of interrogation she’d expected, nonetheless she sat down a moment later without much fuss.

“Good.” Strange headed towards the table-slash-desk, summoning a book to him as he did so. “Before we begin...As you claim to be your universe’s version of the god of lies and mischief, it shouldn’t surprise you if I take some precautions to make sure you’re truthful.” He flipped open the book in his hands, its pages containing incantations and spells useful for interrogation and discerning honesty. Each quite powerful, to varying degrees. Although he suspected none would be as effective against a god (or goddess) of lies as they would against others. “You don’t mind?”

Lokki, eyeing the book and reading its cover, recognized the tome for what it was. A volume of mediocre spells, incantations, and elixir recipes used for extracting answers from the unwitting. Not one of which would be useful against her - Strange had at various times attempted to use the strongest of them on their universe’s Loki, which the god of lies had always countered. Through either magic or his silver-tongue. The goddess, the human wizard assumed, would likewise be ready against the techniques, and thus wouldn’t mind....

“I do mind.” Lokki blurted, glaring at Strange and the book when the wizard started muttering aloud techniques and spells from the book. All ones that were dangerous, either by themselves or because they required powerful and invasive magics. When Strange read out one truth spell that required the ingestion of an elixir made from ingredients not wholly safe, the goddess paled and snapped. “Absolutely not!”

Strange looked askance at Lokki, lifting an eyebrow at her response, and at the woman’s hands once more reflexively shielding her abdomen. “Why? None of these should be too dangerous, considering your ancestry.” He eyed her closely, paying attention to her alarmed expression and how her frost magic seemed to be rearing up again. Not enough to break through his binds on her, but enough to concern him. “That is unless there is something I should know before we start? Any sort of illness or pregnancy…”

Lokki blanched and drew in a breath, the look she flashed him all Strange needed to know the answer. He closed the book abruptly and placed it on the flat surface of his table, mulling over his next words.

“This is a predicament.” Muttered Strange who sat down in a chair beside the desk-table, considering his options. “None of the spells strong enough to interrogate you are safe for your condition.” He paused, glancing at the sorceress. All while thinking that he wouldn’t interrogate her now, even if the spells and techniques were safe.

“Then don’t use them.” Lokki replied, scrutinizing the surgeon-turned-sorcerer. “...Doctor.”

Strange’s brow furrowed at the emphasis on his title, his brain both beaming and suspicious of Lokki’s purpose for addressing him thus. There could be many reasons, but he suspected it was for what it represented.

“Midgardian law on doctor-patient confidentiality is still a thing in this universe, right?” Continued the frost giantess, her question causing the sorcerer to cock an eyebrow, bemused.

“Are you actually asking me to be your doctor?” The sorcerer leaned back in his chair, regarding the goddess with a stoic and discerning leer. It had briefly occurred to him to do as the woman’s words suggested and use his medical profession, with its confidentiality rules to convince Lokki to talk. Hearing the earnest tone her question took made Strange wonder if the Jotunn female actually knew anything about the confidentiality law. His lips pursed when Lokki shrugged. “You do know I was a surgeon, not an obstetrician.”

Lokki just shrugged. “A doctor’s a doctor, right?” She muttered while Strange grimaced, his demeanor similar to when their Loki had revealed that the statue prank had been for April Fools day. No part of him wanted to explain the nuances of Earth’s medical profession and its specialties. “It’s that way in the other of the nine realms.”

“No.” Strange replied after a moment, shaking his head. “I won’t be your doctor.” He paused and leaned forward slightly. “However, if you answer a few questions, I promise not to tell the Avengers about your condition.”

There was a brief silence, before Lokki nodded.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Reclining on the twin-size mattress and box-spring combo bed, though it could hardly be called that, in the room (one much smaller than his cell on Asgard) that the Midgardian Avengers had grudgingly given him after he’d been kicked out of another country, Loki gazed pensively at the ceiling. Not really seeing it, but rather focused on his thoughts and the events of earlier. It was difficult to fathom that not even a day had passed since his female doppelganger had appeared, the Avengers were so focused on her and how her universe had been devastated that it felt like days should’ve passed, not hours. On Asgard, where the general lifespan was 5000 years, everything, except emergencies, moved along slower paced, with much more time put into planning and festivities.

The rushing pace that defined the lives of the Midgardians was so different and, though it caused issues between New Asgard and her Midgardian-human allies, Loki had thrived on it. Mischief is much more fun when the payoff happens quickly, and after just a few months on Midgard, Loki had realized just how much more closer to chaos Midgard was than the other realms. And how better suited Midgardians were for handling it.

If the god of mischief had pulled even a quarter of the stunts he pulled during his second year on Midgard in any of the other realms, he would’ve been imprisoned indefinitely. And the realms would still be dealing with the fallout for years to come. The Midgardians, though, had repaired all the damage caused by his, at times, destructive and dangerous stunts, within weeks and months, if not days!

This had quickly fascinated Loki, and he’d viewed it as a personal challenge to come up with some mischief that wouldn’t be fixed by the Midgardians so quickly, but that also wouldn’t result in Nuclear Armageddon.

(After one of his more dangerous pranks, he’d learned how volatile international relations were between the Midgardian countries with WMDs and, actually frightening, how willing some Midgardians were to use them. There weren’t many, and most were against using them except as a last resort, but just the idea that the Midgardians would ever use nukes against each other, without the safety of being on another planet, had shaken Loki. He was sharing the planet with them after all!)

He ultimately settled on replacing the Statue of Liberty with one of himself - actually replacing it, not merely using an illusion spell. Thus leading to the first event of that afternoon, and his threatened exile to Antarctica. Both which had been immediately overshadowed by the arrival of his doppelganger and her reveal.

“Norns…” Loki muttered under his breath, his arm pillowed under his head as he stared at the ceiling. Not finding the Midgardian pillows comfortable enough for reclining on the bed, he’d tossed them aside. “What a hell of a day it’s been.”

He continued to stare at the ceiling, not yet inclined to read any of the books stacked throughout the bedroom. Nor to cast an illusion spell to hide that fact from the cameras placed in the corners - Stark had insisted on installing them as a temporary condition of Loki being given the room, and hadn’t yet removed them despite admitting he didn’t monitor them as heavily as before. (An unadmitted, direct result of the mischief god engaging in certain - private - activities almost immediately whenever he was alone to spite the Midgardian.)

“Fucking hell.” Loki swore to himself, his thought of the cameras and how he got revenge on the Avenger for insisting on having them installed reminding him of how his female double had stript naked and flirted with Stark. He hadn’t felt particularly self-conscious or embarrassed when he’d engaged in his particular activity knowing that the Avenger was surveilling him. But that was because he knew it would repulse the other man and get him to lay off watching. What his female doppelganger did...that was just - urgh.

‘I need to erase that image from my memory.’ Loki sat up and reached for the drawers beside his mattress, taking out a glass bottle of Midgardian alcohol which he had pilfered some weeks ago from Stark’s collection. ‘How the hell could any version of me flirt with that...urgh?! Naked! And he flirted back!’ The mischief god cringed and took a swig from the bottle, not caring how strong the alcohol was or that the Avenger could very well see him drinking it from the cameras. Or that he would get in trouble for stealing the bottle. (He’d placed a fake on the shelf that he’d taken it from, thus its theft hadn’t been discovered yet.) ‘Norns, he better not be the f….’

The god of mischief suddenly coughed and sputtered, his thoughts going to his female double and a particular tidbit he’d gleaned from her frost magic. It wasn’t something the Midgardians could know, and his brother would likely have forgotten if Thor had even ever listened to the parts of Odin’s stories not dealing with actual battle, but female frost giants reached colder temperatures than the males, and much more quickly. But that second part only applied to pregnant female Jotunn. It was, from what little Loki could discover in Asgard’s library both while growing up and after learning his true heritage, a defensive measure female Jotunn had developed to protect the unborn life inside them.

It was horrible to think about, but according to books dating back to Odin’s father Bor and prior, male Jotunn would often murder the unborn children of rival clans. This was on top of kidnapping the rival clans females and forcing them to bear the new clan’s offspring. A barbaric practice, and one of the many reasons Loki never considered moving to Jotunheim after learning of his heritage.

Even if the fact that Laufey had abandoned him to die as a newborn because he was small wasn’t enough to dissuade him, Loki knew he would never move to Jotunheim. Not even to claim his birthright as heir to Jotunheim’s throne. (Similar to its other uncouth traditions, the throne of Jotunheim was historically passed down to whatever son of the king defeated or even killed the other sons. Laufey had done so himself, forcing his siblings to submit and killing those that didn’t.) Thus Loki could have had a throne for himself in the ice kingdom of Jotunheim, using his intelligence and magic to defeat Laufey’s other sons, but he never wanted it. He was too much an Asgardian, truly a son of Odin, to consider it.

“Norns, if he is…” Loki muttered after clearing his lungs and esophagus of the alcohol that had spilled into them, his stomach feeling queasy. It had been shocking enough figuring out that his female doppelganger was pregnant, (his pointing his dagger at her abdomen had been him testing his hypothesis, which he’d formed after seeing her drastic shift in temperature and realizing that she’d given in too easily to him and Strange.) but the possibility that it could be Stark’s or rather her universe’s Stark’s, was too much. Anyone but that! Anyone would be preferable than the Midgardian.

‘Anyone?’ His subconscious whispered in his head, tauntingly. ‘Even if it could be Thor….’

“Fucking hell no! No way...bloody fucking….” Loki swore, his stomach flip-flopping like he’d drunk a whole Asgardian party worth of wine and mead. His subconscious torturing him with the one idea worse than Stark as the father of his doppelganger’s baby. “No bloody way that’s possible.”

Even as he said that, he realized that it wasn’t impossible. He, and thus his female double, wasn’t Asgardian by blood. Odin had adopted him. And although that likely meant his double, especially since she shared his name ‘Loki’, had likewise been adopted by her universe’s Odin, it did not guarantee it. Female Jotunn were rare. About only 20 to 30 percent of the population. The idea that even a cutthroat like Laufey would abandon a daughter for the same reason he’d abandoned Loki, was mad. Male Jotunn were the fighters, it wasn’t until they passed fertility age that female Jotunn fought alongside the males.

Of course this information he’d culled from the books in Asgard’s royal library, and thus it could be biased. Or inaccurate. Or just plain lies. But Loki hadn’t seen a single female frost giant when he’d gone to set up his plan to kill Laufey. He knew they existed since Jotunn reproduced sexually and had live births. That was an undisputed fact, considering intermarriage between Jotunn and the citizens of other realms like Vanaheim did happen. Rarely, but it did. Before the Jotunn-Asgard war, before the frost giants aggressed on Midgard, there were even pairings between Jotunn and Midgardians.

Thus it was possible that this other Laufey hadn’t abandoned Loki’s female double, and even if the bastard had, it was also possible that Odin may not have adopted Lokki. If the old man had been honest when saying he’d hoped raising Loki as a son would bring true peace between Asgard and Jotunn through him, then it was possible he would see a Jotunn daughter as a similar tool. Albeit with the caveat that a political marriage was much more useful than a royal hostage.

“Fucking hell.” Loki mouthed, grimacing at the thought and grabbing once more for the bottle of Midgardian alcohol. Before he could do more than bring the bottle to his lips, Stark’s voice boomed through the speaker below the camera over the door frame.

“Hey, Reindeer Games, that bottle is worth 30 times more than your and your brother’s ages combined per glass. Stop drinking and put it down, unless you want to owe another 60 grand.” Loki rolled his eyes, closing his lips around the bottle in spite of the Midgardian’s threatening tone. “Fine. The heads of Homeland Security and Shield are still waiting for my decision on what to do with you for the statue mess. Should I tell them to prepare an Antarctic cage? Or maybe a ship to send you to Jotunheim?”

Loki glowered in response towards the surveillance camera and speaker, before placing down the alcohol bottle.

“Good. Now come down to the lab, there’s some things we need to discuss.”

#marvel #marvel mcu #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #fanfiction #loki #thor #natasha romanov #stephen strange #wong #alternate universe #canon divergent #parallel universe #female loki #oc

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catastrophizinglife · 7 years

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FUCK YOU GUTHRIE

BEGIN RANT: Okay, so I’m done with having Guthrie Medical Group as my primary healthcare provider. I like my NP and all that jazz, but it’s not worth the headache anymore. She’s genuinely polite, and seemingly caring and compassionate. This is why my entire cluster go to see her. My sister, my daughter, my daughter’s little sister, and their mother. We’ve been with our primary for too many years to remember. We were even with Guthrie before our NP began practicing with Guthrie. Now whereas our primary is polite and sociable, she seems to lack in experience. Her knowledge just doesn’t seem to be enough. She consistently dopes us up with medications that just don’t cut it, and so we continue to have the same issues repeatedly. Even still, I have been willing to overlook it all, but enough is enough!

1) She’s not actually our doctor. In fact she’s not even a doctor at all, she’s a nurse practitioner. So every time we need medical information for miscellaneous appointments and prescription pickups etc, we’re always at a loss when asked to confirm our doctor‘s name. Our particular Guthrie office employs only a couple actual doctors (who I don’t think even work there). They then hire dozens of NP’s to do the actual grunt work (us patients causing the grunts). Anyway, I’ve overlooked this fact for all these years.

2) I call, get put on hold, hang up, and call back again, until I’m finally helped. (We’ve all been here though, so no biggie).

3) I finally get through to the scheduling department only to be told that my NP is booked solid for over a month. Are you fucking kidding me? (Happens ALL THE TIME).

4) After all refills on meds are gone we have to schedule another appointment. We can’t just call the doctor’s office and let them know so that they can call our pharmacy and let them know, we actually HAVE TO go back to see them. Regardless in the amount of time it’s been; regardless on the medication, we must go back in, and there is no getting around this. - Yeah, because my chronic allergy issues, and my anxiety suddenly went away in 3 months time!

5 & 6) 5) The wait times for our SCHEDULED appointments is outrageous! Why are they always so backed up? Why do they continually double book patients?! I know that this is a common thing to rant about, but I’m serious, it’s horrid! Here’s an example: One day, recently, my sister had an appointment with our primary. I didn’t have an appointment, but because I was going to be there with her I figured I may as well just “do the Walk-In” right there in the same Guthrie office. We were there probably a few minutes before her scheduled appointment. Not 2 minutes later I get called by a nurse to come back. I get weighed, I get seen by the intake nurse. (The one who writes notes on the patient’s condition, and takes the weight, and vitals.) 6) The nurse tells me that the doctor, and a Nurse Practitioner in training will be in to see me in a few minutes. I’m all for medical professionals getting adequate training and experience. I don’t mind it at all. Who wouldn’t want a trained professional to have experience before becoming their primary care physician? And the woman who was still a student was so polite and professional. She was amazing! What I didn’t appreciate was the other nurse practitioner (or doctor) not actually doing a thing but sit there and watch the trainee check me out. I mean I told her that my ears itch terribly, and the sitting woman didn’t even look into my ear to confirm what the trainee was telling her was actually accurate. That’s just fucking lazy and pathetic. So now this nurse in training has THAT as her first few hours into learning in the medical field as her “how-to” guide. I mean is that just fucking insane or what? Anyway, all this happened within like less than 15 minutes. So I get out, and walk down the hall to the nurses station and ask where my sister’s room is, and they point me in the right direction, and I get in there, and they’re only at the point of the intake (vitals) nurse is visiting. So I get in and out in 15 minutes without an appointment, and my sister gets in much later than her scheduled appointment. That’s pretty fucked up if you ask me.

But this next one is where I have to draw the line between what is and is not acceptable for a patient to have to deal with, concerning medical professionals and ‘unprofessionals.’

7 &8) 7) I call to make an appointment, (this goes back to numbers 2 & 3) and after I’m told that I can’t be seen for at least a month, I’m told that I can go to any of their walk-in clinics and be seen for my particular medical issue. So I thanked the woman (even though I was irked because of the long wait-time I’d just experienced, only to be told I can’t be seen) because I’m a super nice guy even when I’ve been shit all over, and I got dressed. I had just gotten back from my daily walk to the post office a couple hours prior to leaving again, and when I was out earlier it had been warm out, and it was pouring cats and dogs, so I dressed for warm weather when I went out on this second walk. I did look out the window to be sure the rain had subsided before I got dressed, and thankfully the rain had stopped. Unfortunately, it had also cooled down quite a bit since I took my first walk. So that was rather unfortunate, but tolerable because I was finally going to get this medical issue diagnosed and treated. The problem is something I posted about in another recent post of mine: A burning, itchy, painful anus. Hurts to squat. Hurts to poop. The pain resembles the pain one gets when they wipe so many times in 1 day. I don’t know if it’s hemmroids, or if it’s an infection of another kind, or if I somehow wounded my ass -I have absolutely no idea why it’s happening to me, all I knew as I left here for the second time today was that I was on my way to get whatever’s wrong with my ass the help it needed so that I didn’t have to live in this pain anymore. Let me paint you a picture. Do you know what it feels like to have wet hair rub back and forth on an already painful, open wound? What about after you’ve sat in water for nearly 2 hours in hopes to ease the pain, gotten out, dried off, and applied hydrocortisone cream all over your freshly softened, open wound? It wasn’t until I was about a block away before the pain heated up by a thousand. Can you imagine what it must have been like for me to walk nearly 1 mile with wet ass hair in and around my asshole rubbing back and forth and back and forth against my softened, medicated wound?? Well if you can’t imagine what that was like for me then you’re actually very lucky. So I arrive at the walk-in. I’ve never personally been seen there, and had only ever gone there once with my sister, so I didn’t really know what to expect. Let me tell you what happened. 8) I walk in and stand by an empty reception desk for a minute or so before an employee walks out from a door in the back of the reception area. She walks over to a computer not where I was located, and asks me to come over to her. So I walk around the reception desk and am standing less than 1 foot from a patient sitting in the “waiting room” when the woman starts asking me for all of my information. I was fine giving her, and this patient who is an old man who looks to be about 60 or 70 -old enough to be old fashioned, but not old enough to be deaf my name, telephone number, address, and even insurance, but when she asked me the reason for my visit I was momentarily mortified. That mortification was quickly dissipated when she stood and said “Oh I’m not sure if we can see you for that. I’ll be right back.” The mortification was replaced with irritation. She came back out and said “yeah, we can’t see patients for those types of issues because we don’t have the equipment for rectal exams here. She then proceeded to ask if I’d like to make an appointment with one of their doctors (yes, in the same non-equipped office). What the fuck does that even mean? You can’t see me today because you don’t have any ass machines, but if I make an appointment for tomorrow you’ll suddenly have the machines needed? I didn’t say anything to her though about my frustrations, I just took the appointment for tomorrow and left. What the fuck!? What in the actual fuck?! But you know what, I wasn’t mad at her, or her lack of an ass machine, or the fact that what she was scheduling me for was kind of nonsensical, I was just so angry at the woman from scheduling who told me to go to the walk in clinic. Bitch I fucking walked damn near 2 miles today with wet hair rubbing on an open wound, are you fucking insane?! ARE YOU FUCKING OUT OF YOUR GOD DAMNED FUCKING MIND?! Believe me, I was crying on the way home! But not crying because of the terrible pain, but because it had gotten so cold that my face got numb and whenever that happens my eyes water uncontrollably. Man if I was a pistol-packing US citizen I’d probably be sitting in county right now.

Guthrie, we’ve had our issues, but wrongly informed scheduling lady has crossed the line. I’m afraid our relationship is at its end. Goodbye!

END RANT

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