#i wish I was interested in the same things as everyone else coz at least then the quality wouldn’t matter and people would care anyway | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dontbipanicjonsa · 3 years

Text

Did Kit suddenly lose his ability to heart-eye or is Pol!Jon actually a thing.

I'm late to the fandom but I just finished S7 and I'm having thoughts.

I'm a reader of the books, and I hadn't watched the show till now because... I suck at watching shows with hour long episodes and more than three seasons.

What made me decide to watch it was the Pol!Jon discourse I found on the Internet.

I know enough about the show to understand how unlikely and out of character this theory would seem to show watchers. At the same time, I fully believe that book!Jon would be fully capable of something like this. But also, even though I do ship Jonsa in the books, I can't deny that Jonerys is.....a big deal. Everyone expects it to happen. It's a highly anticipated pairing and....I just couldn't honestly believe Pol!Jon because it is just so against the general expectation.

So I decided to watch the show. And now I've finished season 7 and I am astounded.

Let me preface this by saying that I went into S7 already disliking Jonerys (sue me) but I still fully expected to have some serious doubts about the validity of Jonsa. I fully expected to be at least somewhat convinced of Jonerys. Even hating the idea of Jon and Danaerys together, I still expected more.

There are a number of things I would like to note here.

First, Jonerys is a romance that is told, not shown. Davos talks about Jon watching Dany's "good heart" (hehe) to tell us Jon is attracted to Dany. But then Jon immediately dismisses it- and not in a way that looks like he's deflecting. He's not only dismissing it, he's dismissive of it. His mind is not in the conversation, it is beyond the Wall.

Similarly, Tyrion says (not in those words), "yeah right, and Jon only looks at you longingly coz he wants a military alliance with you". Not sure what I'm supposed to think about that....? First, Jon doesn't look at Dany longingly at all???? Not once. Second, is this line supposed to suggest that Jon is looking at her longingly for a reason that is not desperately wanting a military alliance....? Because we already know that that's exactly what he does want. Wtf do I make of this statement?????

There are other examples, but the point remains. People keep talking about Jon and Dany being into each other, and that is what is supposed to convince us that they are into each other (well yea Dany is) but Jon gives no indication of looking at her longingly, of falling in love with her, of being intrigued by her even. He's a brick wall.

Alright, I'll concede one (1) scene where I saw legitimate attraction on his face for a second- that is the cave scene. Even there tho, it's hard to tell if he's just watching her reaction carefully or if he wants to bang her.

On the other hand, Dany shows that she is into him. Even so, when I say she's into him, I mean she's attracted to him and intrigued by him. I cannot believe she loves him.

Next, I think it's interesting that in the episode before (or was it the same episode?) Jon bends the knee, we have a number of people (Tormund, Beric) talk about stuff like- kings not bending the knee leading to people dying, knowing what's important (the fight against the dead), being the shield that guards the realm of men blah blah I don't remember the exact words. Then he sees the WW and the Army of the Dead (again) and sees a dragon die. And then, the first opportunity he gets, he bends the knee. I want to point out here that the scenes really emphasise on Jon's thinking face after every conversation he has during their little gay party beyond the Wall. They focus on the look on his face again while he's watching the Army. Multiple times. And there's clearly something going on in his head, gears are turning.

One other scene that struck me is the scene where Jon and Dany are saying goodbye to each other (the Eastwatch episode). In the same episode (if I remember correctly) Jon calls them strangers, and then the goodbye scene comes and Dany says to Jon's little morbid joke, "I've grown used to him". Him being Jon. Two things to note here-

One, Jon considers them strangers but Dany has gotten "used to him". Maybe it's nothing, or maybe it's an indication of how the two of them are absolutely not on the same page (about anything).

Second, Jon's face after she says that. It shuts down. Like a door slamming. And then he says that "wish you good fortune in the wars to come" line, which has ZERO romance, or longing, but a whole lot of bad precedent (does that make sense?). Ouch. The thought that occured to me here is that Dany is being somewhat obvious about her feelings, and maybe, just maybe Jon has picked up on it. And that is why he reacts the way he does.

I wasn't sure so I compared the scene with the Jonsa forehead kiss scene in S6, and Jon's expressions after that kiss.

My logic was this- I assume that either Jon has become aware of Dany's feelings in the Eastwatch goodbye scene, or his own feelings for her. One of these assumptions is true. Which one?

If Jon has feelings for Sansa, then his confusion/awareness/discomfort regarding that are seen in that forehead kiss scene. So if Jon has become aware of his feelings for Dany, let's see how these two scenes compare?

My dudes. There is no comparison. Go watch it.

I watched both scenes with sound off, and the difference is insane. Jon looks at Sansa's lips. There's a moment's pause that's full of tension, and then his face shuts in a way, but it's a bit confused, a bit thoughtful.

Jon does not look at Dany's lips. He does not look confused, or thoughtful. This is not a romance.

Side observation- speaking of showing and telling, it's funny how we're shown Jon looking at Sansa's wolf bits, and told that Jon looks at Dany's good heart. Yes I'm talking about boobs but wolf bits and good heart is funnier. We literally see Jon look at the wolf bits twice, talk about it himself, in a completely unnecessary conversation...as opposed to being entirely dismissive of the good heart, even when someone else brings it up.

Back to the main point, one last thing I'd like to talk about is the scene where Jon actually bends the knee (not really). First, there are still no heart-eyes. Definitely not from Jon. Second, it's funny how Jon uses the exact hand-grabbing move that Sansa used on him last season, when she was trying to convince him to do something he didn't particularly wanna do (like he's now trying to do with Dany). This means that

1) he learnt that move from Sansa. He knows how effective it is XD

2) if the Jonerys hand-grab is romance, it stands to reason that the Jonsa hand-grab is romance too. I mean both the grabs are suspiciously similar.

Then, even after Dany "promises" that she'll help the North fight the WW, Jon still bends the knee. I felt both an odd sense of urgency coming from him, and an understandable hesitation. Or maybe that's just me.

Now suddenly, he becomes complimentary of her. But there's something weird about his compliments. They are completely generic. "They'll see you for what you are" and in the later episode, "you're not like the others". Wtf does that MEAN ??

Here's the thing...Jon could have paid Dany a way more specific, genuine sounding compliment after bending the knee (complete with heart eyes). I mean she did just fly over the Wall to rescue him and his men. He could have said more, something meaningful, but he didn't. He bent the knee like a house on fire (that doesn't make sense but you get what I mean I hope) and paid generic compliments. Then he pretended to sleep until she left and then sighed very loudly.

??? Romance??? WHERE????

Then the dragon pit. Heart-eyes still missing.

Then the sex scene. What do I say? Lol.

No really. There are no heart eyes even during the sex scene. Honestly, idk what that face was. Not in love for sure.

Another side note- Arya and Sansa have talks while standing in the same place where the forehead kiss scene happened (wtf do you call that place again, the bridge.??) But no heart eyes. No lingering looks. There is no incestuous gay love between them, I can say for sure. All it does is prop up the odd incestuous vibes of the Jon Sansa scene in that same place.

ANOTHER side note- goddamn but does Sansa talk about Jon a lot.

Edit: I'm sure most of this stuff has already been discussed in other metas. My purpose here is only to put down my first thoughts after watching the season.

#jonsa meta #jonsa #political jon #pol!jon #dark dany

144 notes · View notes

josefavomjaaga · 3 years

Note

Hi ! Who was Eugène friends with throughout his life and were there people with whom he was not so friendly? How was your relationship with your wife's family? Thank you!

Hi there, and thanks for the question! Also, please bear with me, ´coz this is going to be lengthy.

Eugène's position changed a lot over the years but there are some people, usually not well-known, who will remain friends with him throughout all his life.

During the Consulate, Eugène was something like everybody's darling. This was partly due to his position as stepson of the new chief of state. First Consul Bonaparte increasingly resembled a monarch, and Eugène, the son of Madame Bonaparte,was the closest thing to a crown prince there was. Eugène's biographer Michel Kérautret emphasises how much he (and in a different vein his sister) were seen as the »next generation of France«. Eugène commanded one of the most famous regiments, the Chasseurs au Cheval de la Garde, and was universally admired. Little boys looked at him with big eyes when he walked by. Besides, he was completely apolitical, only interested in women, horses and the army, and could therefore be invited by anyone. As long as there was music and dancing, Eugène was happy.

His closest friends also came from the ranks of the army. His probably best friend is hardly known: Auguste Bataille (de Tancarville), later Baron of the Empire and one of Eugène's aides-de-camp. Napoleon was not very enthusiastic about him and his abilities. (If I remember correctly, poor Bataille once had the misfortune to have a thief steal the briefcase with the documents he was supposed to bring to Napoleon. Eugène then got a nasty letter saying "Don't send me that idiot any more!")

Auguste Bataille remained in Eugène's service until his death in 1821. He is the one Eugène sends to Napoleon in 1809 to report the arrival of the Armée d'Italie in Austria (when Eugène was probably expecting the thrashing of his life and instead received a hero's welcome). But he is also the one whom Eugène's sister and wife turn to when they want news of Eugène and he himself has no time to write, so clearly someone who is quasi-family. When Eugène had to leave Italy, Bataille, who was married there, remained behind to administer Eugène's Italian properties. He died in 1821, and when Planat de la Faye asked Eugène for a job in 1822, Eugène explicitly referred to the late Bataille and said "You have seen who else belongs to my entourage. Bataille was my friend and the only one I could really rely on - I want someone like that again." (Planat de la Faye will take this job very seriously and later defend Eugène's memory like a bloodhound).

Just to mention a few other people who became important to Eugène since his time in Italy and who also accompanied him to Munich into exile: his cousin Louis Tascher and his wife, his adjutant General Triaire and the family of his former secretary for political affairs, Etienne Méjean and his only remaining son. After Eugène's death, Eugène’s children will grow up with the children of Méjean Jr.; they will call them "Papa Méjean" and Grand-Papa Méjean".

Let's move on to more prominent people. Among the marshals, Eugène's best friend was clearly Bessières. Bessières had been Eugène's superior since Egypt and remained so until Eugène went to Italy as viceroy. Apparently Napoleon had tasked Bessières with taking Eugène under his wing (or perhaps just with preventing his overzealous stepson from accidentally killing himself in the Sahara in an attempt to somehow distinguish himself). This resulted in a friendship that lasted for years. Eugène called Bessières "tu" in his letters, even when he had become prince and viceroy; there are apparently over a dozen letters to him in the "Archives Nationales", which are according to the description "of a predominantly private nature". After returning from Egypt, Eugène and Bessières shared a house in Paris (and apparently the two also plunged into Paris nightlife together). Eugène also accompanied Bessières when the latter visited his fiancée in Cahors and repeatedly sent his regards to Madame Bessières. After Bessières' death, there were several letters of condolence between Eugène and Bessières’ widow. In his memoirs, Eugène defended Bessières against some accusations that Lannes had made against him after the battle of Marengo. (One would think that this would have been time-barred by 1823).

Duroc, from whom Eugène sometimes sent greetings in his letters to Hortense, completed the trio of friends (but Duroc seemed to get on well with everyone). Eugène recounts in his memoirs how Duroc once stopped him from literally sleeping through his duty in Egypt; later they lay wounded side by side in the military hospital outside Acre (Duroc, however, considerably worse). When Eugène was left all alone and clueless in Milan as Viceroy of Italy (that was how he saw the matter), Duroc seems to have been the only one who regularly looked after him and wrote to him. Apparently Duroc and Eugène also "shared" the attentions of a young lady from the stage (Emilie Bigottini). Later, whenever Napoleon was particularly angry with Eugène (which happened with a certain frequency), he did not write to him himself, but had someone else write; usually it was Duroc. Duroc was also the one who delivered the marriage proposal to Eugène's prospective father-in-law. When Eugène was in Vienna in 1809, he wrote an enthusiastic letter home to his wife because he had finally, for the first time in three years, been dining together with Bessières and Duroc! (Funnily enough, Bessières wrote almost the same letter to his wife).

However, Eugène's oldest friend among Napoleon's close collaborators, who even became his relative, was Lavalette. When Eugène, not quite 16 and just out of school, went to Italy as Napoleon's adjutant, the first Italian campaign was basically over. Napoleon sent his stepson to Corfu with dispatches (and explicit orders to get some rest and sightseeing there), and gave him Lavalette as an escort. Before the Egyptian campaign, when Lavalette was to ask for the hand of Emilie de Beauharnais, Eugène had to chaperone him and his cousin for a walk, only to remember that he had urgent business elsewhere and leave them alone. Lavalette was also among those whom Eugène continued to address as "tu" in his letters after he was promoted to viceroy. And after Lavalette narrowly escaped execution in the Second Restoration, he took refuge with Eugène in Bavaria, where Eugène and King Max more or less successfully hid him.

I'm limiting this to Eugène's male friends, by the way. Female acquaintances are another matter altogether.

Who did Eugène not get on so well with? Quite a lot of people, interestingly enough, consideringhe is described in almost all sources as incredibly amiable, patient and sociable.

There is, of course, his rivalry with Murat, the exact origins and background of which would interest me immensely. The two were actually in a very similar position from 1810 on at the latest, but rather than communicating with each other, the two seem to have been constantly at each other's throats. I have the impression that Murat made a timid attempt at reconciliation now and then, and that at this stage Eugène was the one who no longer wished to hear anything from Murat. Probably because he held Murat responsible for Napoleon's separation from Josephine.

And only to avoid any false impression: Murat and Eugène also called each other "tu" when they met in private. But in their official correspondence, they almost suffocate from the pompous phrases they throw at each other.

Someone Eugène did not get on with at all was Marshal André Masséna. For this, I think alot of things came together: a social background that couldn't be more different, and perhaps a sense of class superiority on Eugène's part. On the other side, Masséna, who had really fought his way up from the gutter by his own efforts, was unlikely to have taken seriously this brat who, thanks to his stepdad, was allowed to play viceroy in Italy. Eugène, for his part, with his rather naïve attitude to war, was horrified by Masséna's ... rather creative approach to the subject of requisition and his general attitude to "mine" and "yours". In 1805 he complained bitterly about the way Masséna and his men had plundered the Italians they were supposed to protect, and Masséna actually had to pay back a huge amount of money. In 1809, Eugène desperately wanted no marshal (it would probably have been Masséna) to be sent to Italy, but to be allowed to take command himself. When the battle of Sacile promptly turned into a disaster, Napoleon told him pointedly that this would not have happened with Masséna, Masséna’s plundering notwithstanding.

Similarly, Eugène clashed with Auguste Marmont. This was also about money, financial trickery and personal enrichment. On this point, Eugène did not joke (and presumably this was precisely the reason why Napoleon had appointed him as overseer in Italy). The friction with Marmont developed into an enmity that lasted truly until after the death of the two adversaries, or rather only really erupted there: Marmont accused Eugène in his posthumously published memoirs (not entirely without reason, but in a rather exaggerated manner) of having been the main reason for Napoleon's defeat in 1814, and Eugène's daughters and Planat de la Faye (see above) then took the editor of the memoirs to court. Absolutely crazy.

From his correspondence, I take it he also at least once discovered Bourienne’s financial shenanigans in Hamburg.

I unfortunately do not know how his relationship with Marshal Lannes was (but I would love to know). My gut feeling says: probably similar to Masséna. Eugène does mention Lannes twice in his memoirs, both times respectfully. But I have not come across any personal interaction or correspondence between them at all. As Lannes was close to Murat and somewhat at odds with Bessières, he’s unlikely to have been friends with Eugène.

As this has gotten so long already, I’ll stop here and put anything about Eugène’s Bavarian in-laws into an extra post at a later date. Just so much for now: If this was Facebook, I’d pick »It’s complicated«.

#eugene de beauharnais #napoleon #auguste bataille #etienne méjean #jean baptiste bessières #jean lannes #antoine marie lavalette #geraud christophe michel duroc #andré masséna #auguste marmont

66 notes · View notes

sk-lumen · 3 years

Note

Need serious advice about setting boundaries or communicating when dealing with a person who:

Is a parent

Has unhealthy communication methods -- it takes very little for them to start full-blown screaming, shouting out all your 'negative' things/mistakes/past, can continue to scream-criticise you even after you've gone silent, for WHOLE MINUTES even if you've shut up, will not accept anything that even hints at them making a mistake

You can't trust since childhood coz u made the mistake of confiding in them with a serious issue as a young teen --- mental related --- and they belittled and invalidated you, and since then pretended you never confided in them and have NO IDEA how you've been coping without them or ANYone else for years... Yeah thanks, parent, what u said back then made me think I was the one at fault and so I stopped trusting even friends coz yeah, when ur own parent doesn't give a damn, why would anyone else?

Is a master at silent treatments without explaining what EXACTLY they're punishing you for, then when theyre in the mood, will start talking to you as if they hadn't ignored you for days. Lol I'd rather be water boarded I think. Especially for all the damage this caused when I was a child

Won't openly talk about what they want, yet expects ALL FHE TIME others (in the family) to know what they want, then will complain/scream/angry for AGES about how no one cares, no one gives a damn... And when someone asks them what they want, they either say: nothing, or "you should know! Can't u see?"

Upon asking them to please talk normally, will blow a fuse, and lose it --- happened multiple times today

Literally will use me as a scape goat to unleash their frustrations upon. Even when I leave the room, I can hear them b*tch about how much of a failure I am etc. The trigger being anything that bothers them, from a phone call to something other siblings did, bla bla. I limit my time with them... But it's like, it feels impossible to have them treat me normally, without ridiculing or criticising me. I'm already a very low self esteem person... This doesn't help AT ALL

In short, refuse to tell/ask/discuss important stuff, and getting mad randomly that no one read their mind, bcoz everyone's 'old enough to have enough sense' to know what they 'should' do... Eg will not pikc up the phone when we call them from the store to ask when what the needed isn't available, so what other alternative can we get... And then when we get home, will instead blame us for being fussy and not getting the alternative, completelt skirting around the issue they didn't deign to pick up the phone... I mean, I don't get it. In the past I HAVE in fact asked them to just openly tell me what they want/expect from me to make them happy... Got passive aggressive answers like "don't you know? Are you dumb?" Bla bla

Passive aggressive to the max when they've lost it

Expect me to drop anything I'm doing and immediately cater to them, and expect me to help them in their hobbies (while simultaneously, as I learned many years ago to much heartache, not being interested or even pretending to be interested in my hobbies. The disinterest taught me very quickly how much what I wanted meant, leading to years of self-invalidation. Luckily I've learned it really is them, not me. My hobbies are valid)

Will not talk about why they're feeling angry, what causes it. Instead will blame me, who's like the golden scapegoat in our amazing family, by saying :YOU made me negative. They've said it many times now... It hurts a lot, when I'm also struggling with my own issues which I ofc can't confide in them about :)

Today I manned up -- the outburst of hatred happened again! Over a simple thing. It was NIGHTMARE and made me angry/sad/frustrated/triggered---, and so I told them to stop talking like that... Boy was that the wrong thing to say... I don't think I can accurately tell u what happened afterwards...

Usually children learn communication skills from the parents... I at least learned to recognize the unhealthy ones, and what NOT to communicate like lol. Like, other parent is even worse, believe it or not. But that's another complex situation

I'm not bashing on the parent. Lord knows I even have that much of a right huh? I hate myself eveb more when they invalidate me if I try to show how MUCH THEY HURT me after a 'communication session'. As in, heaven forbid me if I BE SILENT afterwards and DON'T wanna listen to their retardation. Nope. Even then they provoke me, rage at me, you know how sometimes enraged people hiss vitriol thru gritted teeth? Yeah, that's what they did today after I stayed silent and tried to ignore them an hour later after the 'session' when they wabted something. It's like they don't even need me to say a word and will carry on and on for minutes 🤢

I feel alone, helpless and at a loss what to do

I want to move out. Due to severe mental issues I can't even move out rn coz it scares me even more. But this has to stop. Things are only okay if I'm absolutely passive, say yes to whatever they want, kill my wants and needs, and become a perfect robot bred to cater to them (parent)

I hope you can help me out, dear

Hi darling,

It sounds like you’re in a considerably toxic environment. I'm sorry you're going through this. Know that this is not normal, nor is it how a parent/child relationship should be. In case there's any doubt, let me start by saying you deserve to be supported, respected, listened to, to have your needs met. You deserve to live in an environment that offers you all of these things.

With that being said, from the many scenarios you’ve mentioned you’ve already tried reasoning and setting boundaries, to no avail. There is only so much you can do on your own, if the other person in the equation is not meeting halfway or at all. After all, a healthy conversation involves two people, not just one.

Here's my advice, in this order:

Calmly and maturely asking the respective parent to have a serious discussion with you and to listen to what you have to say. Share how their actions and behaviour is making you feel, let them know you care, and make sure to mention several solutions for the issue as well. If this doesn’t work…

Bring up the subject of needing help from outside, such as the assistance of a specialist/therapist. Family counselling can shed a lot of light on toxic behaviours that are ingrained from childhood (both in their case and yours), on fears your parent may have, stress from their work, whatever is causing their outbursts and anger - because there is always a reason. Behind anger is sadness, and behind sadness is some need not being met, or an underlying fear, trauma, etc. This is not a justification for their behaviour, they are responsible for it; this is simply the fact of how energy dynamics work. People bottle up their frustrations, fears, etc, and let them out on those closest to them, to whom they feel superior. It’s not fair, and it’s not healthy, but it is frequently how this pattern works. If this solution doesn’t work either…

Then unfortunately, all you can do is focus on yourself. If they refuse to meet you anywhere along the road, you have to pack up your things and go your own way. Literally or metaphorically. They may be your parent and you may love them even in spite of their behaviour, but you cannot hold yourself responsible for anything they say or do; that is on them. In those cases, you have to prioritize your own mental health and wellbeing, and focus on moving out. If your (home) environment is toxic, you have to focus on first changing it. That’s vital. Only afterwards can you start healing, refinding yourself, reclaiming your self-esteem and confidence, your sense of worth. As long as you stay stuck in a toxic environment, you cannot really heal; if there is abuse of any kind (physical, mental, emotional), the causes are still there, leading to re-traumatizing.

If for whatever reason moving out is not (yet) an option, I would emphasize seeking some sort of counselling for yourself, if nothing else. You need an anchor, some sort of support that will help you along your path until you do get out.

Now, I don’t know how old you are. I am going to assume you are over 18 and of age, so only mind my advice if that is the case. (As disclaimer, I don't provide advice to minors as it's not the scope of my blog nor am I specialized/focused on that area.)

I understand moving out seems scary because it is unknown, but with that line of thought you may wait another 10 years in the same situation. Wouldn’t you wake up 10 years later already having done the hard work on moving out, finding your independence, claiming your sense of individuality and moving on from this sort of environment, this phase in your life?

Sooner is better than later, but do so with mindfulness and care over your mental health, of course. I know it’s scary. But being an adult requires some difficult decisions at times, and setting boundaries begins with choosing your wellbeing and doing what needs to be done, even if it is something uncomfortable short-term, but highly rewarding and beneficial long-term.

Hope this helps... and wishing you much luck, clarity, gentle guidance and comfort.✨

PS: Lately I've been receiving longer and longer letters in my inbox. As solution, I was thinking of having longer asks/letters redirected to my blog where there isn't any length limit, and readers can more comfortably browse both my tumblr and blog - and those requesting advice can share and receive a more in-depth response.

-Lumen

#mental health #toxic relationship #toxic environment #boundaries #parenthood #ask #tw? not sure what to tag just in case #tw: swearing #tw: mental health #tw: anxiety

19 notes · View notes

jade-doodles-questionmark · 3 years

Text

On Alexander, Angelica and Eliza

Heres some long-ass personal interpretation based on the musical that nobody following this blog signed up for lol. Not gonna be touching on history coz i’m no expert and there’re ppl way more qualified for that. and it’s good to keep things separated.

there’re obviously many similarities between the two A’s. Both are witty, outspoken, center of attention, and a bit of a flirt. To me, the most interesting trait shared by both is their awareness: They know exactly where they stand socially, and subsequently, how to play by the rules to climb up. This clear awareness is where I got the idea for the staircase drawings. “i’m a girl in a world in which my only job is to marry rich/ my father has no sons so i’m the one who has to social climb for one” is a demonstration of Angelica’s awareness, just as “As a kid in the Caribbean I wished for a war/ I knew that I was poor/ I knew it was the only way to rise up” shows Alexander’s.

it’s different for Eliza - i know as the show proceeds, she gradually becomes more ambitious and active, but in Who Lives Who Dies Who Tells Your Story, what she asks, instead of how to rise up, is: “Have I done enough?” this quiet insistence is why i always see her as someone who does things because she thinks it’s a right thing to do, no matter whether that thing in question would benefit her personally or not. sure, she gives off "cinnamon roll" vibes, but girl’s no less strong or badass than Alexander or Angelica.

More under cut coz I’m incapable of being concise:

Angelica:

what always strikes me as interesting about Angelica is the contrast of what she says vs. what she does.

In The Schuyler Sisters, the majority of her lines are about empowering women, which, I think, is where the depiction of Angelica as an angry feminist comes from in some fanfics. But in Satisfied, we see she plays squarely by the rules of patriarchy and social classes (the three fundamental truths part).

Similarly, in TSS, she says "so men say I'm intense or I'm insane", seemingly unbothered, if not lowkey proud, by these comments, but in Satisfied, she talks about the resulting gossip if she were to marry Alexander.

I saw a post which expressed that Angelica thinks like Alexander but acts like Burr, and I agree. She has a sharp mind and is unafraid to speak out, like Alexander, but she’s also got things to lose, like Burr. Having family responsibilities means that she does not, and cannot, act without restrictions and hesitations like Hamilton. She doesn't necessarily wait it out like Burr, but she does think things thru, because the important decisions she makes carry enough weight to not only affect the future of herself but also of her family.

I had mentioned in an old post that Satisfied is basically Angelica assessing cost & gain for each of the options she has, for all the parties involved. even though that song's ending has mixed feelings and it's DEFINITELY a heartbreaking song, Angelica's choice did maximize the gain for everyone at the time: She was able to maintain her bond with Alexander and married rich to ensure her material comfort. Alexander was able to marry a Schuyler and elevate his status. Eliza got the boy she loved and was happily married. She even foresaw some possible challenges the newly wed Hamiltons were likely to face (“He’ll never be satisfied”).

She knows she lives in a world of patriarchy; she isn't happy with it, but she knows how to take advantage of the system as much as she can. She knows how to be the center of attention, be charming, and appeal to ppl. She knows what kind of husband is beneficial to have. She knows how to influence politics in her own way (take a break). Part of why I found Satisfied so sad is that her mind and her heart wish for two different things. Angelica is a realist, over everything else. She can be a feminist, but definitely not an angry one.

Alexander:

I talked a bit abt him in an older post on Maria - and a lot of what I said abt Maria applies to him. If the challenge Angelica was facing is invisible societal restrictions on women, what Alexander faces is purely regarding survival. Having needed to fight and compete for resources, I imagine he's at least somewhat influenced by the philosophy of social darwinism. I also said, in the same post, that I don't think he'd be really inclined to help ppl in the same difficulty he used to be in, for the same reason. If he could make it this far with his own hard work, how would it be fair to make things easier for others now? Would those ppl even deserve their success now the bar has been lowered? It's not exactly a right way of thinking, but it's also hard to blame him. after having to compete for resource w others in order to climb up, it’s hard to change the mentality.

I've seen a music analysis (by Howard Ho on YouTube) on Hurricane, and it concludes that when Hamilton was singing that song, he wasn't exactly recalling the past - he's been mentally living in that reality and never truly left. (There's similar remarks that Hamilton's past in the Caribbean had always plagued him despite his power and position in Chernow's biography, but we're only analyzing the musical here.) He never fully turned off his survival mode.

To clarify: by survival mode, I don't literally mean he fights to survive. He didn't exactly show a strong will to survive and was quite willing to give up his life for noble causes, up until he met Eliza. What I meant is, he remembers being destitute and helpless, he remembers seeing deaths of trivial importance, so he fights to be as far away from destitution and helplessness as possible, he fights to have the opportunity to die a glorious and noble death. Because to be able to die for something matters is still a privilege. No matter how high up he rose to position, his insecurity that he may end up losing those never faded away. This raw energy, I guess, is what gradually turned the others in the musical to be more like him.

Eliza:

Eliza seems to be the one who's the most content abt their situations out of the three. After all, one of her motifs in the musical is "look around at how lucky we are to be alive right now", and the other one is “that would be enough”.

ppl usually say Helpless and Satisfied should be listened back to back (and nothing wrong with that), but comparing these two songs, Helpless doesn’t explore as much of Eliza’s character as Satisfied does Angelica. Throughout Helpless, she’s spent most of the song narrating what happened and falling head over heels for Alexander. As for her first appearance in TSS, she doesn’t have as much of a voice and show of character in comparison to Angelica, Burr, other Peggy either.

The first moment we truly see her thoughts is in That Would Be Enough. It’s also in this song, her two other motifs (”that would be enough” and “narrative”) are introduced. Unlike Alexander and Angelica at that point of story, she’s happy with her life, wants it to remain that way, and doesn’t ask for more.

i dont mean she’s not ambitious like the other two - she’s driven, but by other things. she doesn’t think of legacy, material comfort, status, position, etc. as important as Angelica and Alexander, as we can see in Burn. it’s not that she doesn’t know the rules - girl’s not playing the game at all.

unlike the two A’s, Eliza’s growth happens in the second act. Angelica’s barely in the second act, and in the same act we see Alexander’s most trusted weapon, writing, contributing to his downfall. but for Eliza, she turns from the observer in Helpless, the supporter in That Would Be Enough, to the only one on stage in Burn, and to being the center of stage in Who Lives Who Dies Who Tells Your Story. in the second act we see her going thru the series of most crushing heartaches: Reynolds Pamphlet, death of Phillip, and death of Alexander, but we also see her strength. she’s a good person, but ppl usually forget that being nice takes energy and strength too. it takes strength to support, to forgive, to mourn the passing of your loved ones, and to preserve their memories and legacy. she shines and grows after overcoming the loss and heartbreaks. Angelica says in Satisfied “she’d say 'i’m fine' but she’d be lying”, i don’t think she’s giving Eliza enough credit for her mental strength there lol.

side note: this is where i got idea for the eliza art from a few days ago - kintsugi represents the idea that your wound becomes your history and forms part of who you are, rather than something ugly to be ashamed of. I think it fits well with Eliza’s development.

Congrats! you’ve made it till the end! don’t know why u’d do that, but thanks!

if u’re reading this feel free to send me a simple art request to compensate the time u took reading my bullshit

#hamilton #alexander hamilton #hamliza #eliza schuyler #eliza hamilton #Angelica Schuyler #hamgelica #the schuyler sisters #character analysis #long post #*cough* Excuse me my lit major is showing #jades weird ideas

58 notes · View notes

tellywoodtrash · 3 years

Text

immj2 02.11.20 lb

this fucking episode my dudes. i just went through it like...

business maharani is doing some more bitchification of bhaabi, ki dekho phir nikal gayi aapke peeche. even used the same lameass mandir excuse, the idiot, instead of coming up with something new.

hubs like riddhima is a major pain in the ass, but she's MY PAIN IN THE ASS, where isss sheeee, why isn't she back yet???????? is she ok????????????

ishani getting a call about someone in the hospital and......

bitch, it's her friend who's in the hospital. why the fuck would anyone call ISHANI of all people if riddhima was in the hospital????

lo aa gayi.

gujarat registration gaadi waale bhaiyya was a careful driver. unlike literally everyone else on tellywood. good for him.

concern!maxxxxxxxxxxx about her haalat.

asks about her bleeding hand and she's like i'll tell you if you tell me about how YOUR hand got hurt. noice.

again, rrahul's not putting on the vansh voice in this scene and it's 300% more watchable. for the love of god stop directing him in a way that impedes his performance!!!!!!! LET THE MAN MOVE HIS FACE AND TALK IN HIS NORMAL VOICE!!!!!!!!!!!

cliche dialogue about “shareer ke ghaav jaldi bhar jaate hain par dil ke ghaav..........”

this asshole is like yeah who would know that better than me???? BITCH WHAT IS THIS, THE TRAUMA OLYMPICS???

she's thinking ki yeah, i'm not gonna fall for your fakeass parwaah anymore. good. i like. she needed this stupidass illusion of her's broken longggggggggg back.

ohohohohoho ib waala mangalsutra breaking and slipping off trope idhar bhi hai.

“tooti hui cheezein kabhi kabhi dobara nahi judti.”

dialogue maarke chali gayi, lol.

but notice she's the one who caught it anyway. which makes me think she's gonna choose him/this relationship YET AGAIN. *deeeeeeeepest sigh in the world that sucks up all the oxygen in the atmosphere*

“jaise mera dil.”

OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOH.

“lekin ab waqt aa gaya hai bohut se cheezon ko sahi karne ka.”

again, he looks menacing and all, but is probably just talking about making sure all the paperwork is up to date for upcoming end of year audits. he's a very rich accountant, remember???

ragini's medical reports have come.

lol being married to ishani is taking yearssssssss off angre's lifespan. roz naya tension, naya drama.

also, angre refers to vansh as "vansh bhai" when talking about him to ishani, but calls him "boss" when referring directly. interesting. veryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy interesting. you guys need to sort out that relationship, my dudes. it's the only stable, healthy one in this whole damn show.

ishani is like you're his right hand, what the hell are you doing about riddhima spying on him and getting all up in his business???????? dang, this might be the first conversation they're having about their only common interest: vansh's well being.

also i notice ki shivaay ke saare shirts angre ko diye gaye hain. huh, the shirts must have a kanji eyed wearer clause in their contract.

“mujhe shakti dijiye ke main apne emotions se upar uthke sahi ke saath khadi rahoon.”

damn, first time i've had a lil respect for riddhima. i mean, i know ultimately it's all gonna go to shit, but she's trying.

lmao a dhaarmik aarti version of the title track is playing. a version for every situation!

“main ragini ko bacha ke rahoongi. yeh mera aapse, ragini se, aur apne aap se vaada hai.”

YESSSSSSSSSSS BITCH, SISTERS OVER MURDEROUS MISTERS!!!!!!!!!!!

OMG WHY WON'T Y'ALL JUST DRESS HIM LIKE THIS, LIKE ARNAV, WITH THE SHIRT AND SWEATER COMBOOOOOOOOOOOOO. PLS GODDDDDDDDDDDD STOP DRESSING HIM WITH THAT STUPID SCARF WAALA BLAZERRRRRRRRRRRRR I BEG OF YOUUUUUUUUUU

he's talking to some shadow (def a woman) about how they're his humraaz about the whole ragini issue and nothing is hidden from them and how everything is going as they planned and the story will end soon.

it might be siya but omg i hope to goddddddddddddd it's ishani. i really really reallly want it to be ishani and see the hot demon siblings do some scheming and planning together. the sibs that conspire together, stay together!!!!!!!!!

menacing growling about riddhima and how he needs shadow chick's help in "handling" her, so that she doesn’t leave the house.

“chaahe VR mansion uske liye jail bann jaaye, i don't care.” cool, real healthy. also copied from this week's naagin 5. i'm telling you, these two shows be copying their homework off each other.

vansh leaning real hard on how he trusting shadow chick. hmmmm. reallyyyy hope it's ishani. though can’t say i wouldn’t be delighted if siya also turns out to be just as fucking twisted as him.

ofc ms. snoopy here has come to snoop. SIS TUM THAK NAHI JAATI KYA ISS SAB SE. MUJHE TOH DEKHTE HI THAKAAN HO GAYI HAI AND I NEEDS ME SOME GLUCON D.

“ragini riddhima se jeete-jee milna toh door, usse dekh bhi na sake.”

uh a little too late for that my man, lol. your girls already had a catchup session this afternoon. they're going for brunch and manis next weekend!

oh ho, she knows that angre's gone out. so this is def someone else in the house. DAMN, I'M REALLY INVESTED IN THIS SHADOW NOW.

yaaar, kya haalat bana rakhi hai shivaay ke room ki. best room hota tha iss set ka, aur isko bas ek random space banaa rakha hai.

ASLKFJSLDKJFLSDKJFLDKSF

this fucker crazyyyyy. like fulllll on flipping cray cray!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wow ok he's shaking from rage. more unhinged than i've ever seen him. which is really something. something scary as fuckkkkkkkk.

kudos to riddhima for just being like same old, same old, instead of being scared. i'm really liking i-give-no-fucks-riddhima.

DUDE. THIS FUCKER HAS COMPLETELY LOST IT.

also knife play copied from shivaay. this dude like a much much worse version of shivaay. never thought that would be possible, but never say never with ITV and the year 2020.

ok i don't like this angry version of him that's outta control, all shaking and growling and panting. not only is it really bad acting, it's hard to take seriously as menacing. ppl are always scarier when they're ice fucking cool with their anger.

blah blah blah some more growled warnings and riddhima and i are just here like............. “ok and????”

she's not even allowed to leave the room.

oooooh brave sis questioning him back and provokingggggggggg himmmmmmmmmm. got a death wish, this one, but i like her like this. i was sick of her just collapsing all over the place weeping. thaaaaaank god she found her longlost backbone.

“tum jaise haiwaan ki baat kabhi nahi maanungi.”

sarcastic slow clapping and slightly turned on by this show of dheentness.

“chalo aaj tumhari bahaaduri ko celebrate karte hain.”

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

“piyo, zeher nahi milaaya hai ismein.”

OK NOW THAT YOU SAID THAT I'M DEFINITELY THINKING THAT YOU HAVE.

omg ridhhimaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa you idiottttttt.

ok he's def put something in it. his face almost looking pitying as he takes the glass back.

“jaao. jahaan jaana hai jaao. nahi rokunga tumhe.”

ohhhhhhhhhh boy.

dslkfjsdlfkjdslkfjdslkjflkd her legs don't work no moreeeeeeeee.

THIS FUCKERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. JESUS CHRIST THIS CRAZY ASS FUCKING D;SLFKJ;SLDKFJ;LDSKJF;LDKJ

EVEN THE CHANNEL PUTTING BIG BOLD DISCLAIMER OVER THE SCENE LIKE THIS SHIT IS SERIOUSLY UNHINGED AND FICTIONAL THE CHANNEL ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT CONDONE THIS FUCKING MADNESSSSSSSSS

I CANNOT STOP SCREAMING THIS FUCKERRRRRRR IS OH MY FUCKING GOD WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK IS THIS THIS SHIT IS MAKING 4 LIONS MEN LOOK LIKE SOFT CUDDLY LIL SOFTBOIS I AM LITERALLY GOING OUTTA MY MIND WITH RAGE AND ANGUISH WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

i need a break. i seriously need a break to go cuddle my cat coz my god this deranged fucking showwwwwwwwwww.

ok cuddle break done. i’m not feeling any better but at least the tears of blood have stopped flowing from my eyes?

all i gots to say at this point is that CHEELANSHU SINGHANIA FROM NAAGIN 5 WOULD NEVER DO THIS. ONCE AGAIN SANKIIII CHEEL BOY >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> HUMAN MEN.

“haiwaan hoon main. rakshas hoon. aur rakshas kuch bhi kar sakta hai.”

electric chair for you, dude. ELECTRIC FUCKING CHAIR, GREEN MILE STYLE.

he literally gave her a paralytic.

“isse ek luxury relaxing spa treatment ki tarah enjoy karna.”

OMG I WISH I HAD SOMEONE MAKE ME SLIP INTO A PARALYTIC COMAAAAAAAAAA WHAT ELSE COULD A GIRL WANT FROM PRINCE CHARMING UWU TRUE WUVVVVVVVVV

omg inn paplu taplu ka chip waala naatak abhi bhi chal raha hai BIGGER THINGS HAVE HAPPENED IN THE HOUSE YOU IDIOTS KEEP THE FUCK UP LITERALLY NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR SADAA HUA MEMORY CARD ANYMOREEEEEEEEEE

anyway they decide to put it in the bank locker. omg why though, under the mattress was suchhhhhhh a safe and secure spot!!! badal kyun rahe ho tum log?!?!?!!?!?

“good morning.”

sis, lower half is paralysed. haath abhi bhi kaam kar rahein haina??? PICK UP WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU CAN GET YOUR HANDS ON AND HURL IT AT HIS FUCKING HEADDDDDDDDDDD

“don't worry, bas kuch der ki baat hai. uske baad tum apne pairon pe khadi ho sakti ho. main tumhari help kar deta hoon.”

TELLL HIM SIS. TELL HIM TO STAY THE FUCK AWAY AND NEVER EVER COME WITHIN A 3 DISTRICT RADIUS OF YOU.

“phir se zidd. tumhara naam riddhima nahi, ziddhima hona chahiye tha.”

ok can't deny i lol'd at that.

OK NO BACK TO HATING HIM. PUNS WILL GET YOU NOWHERE WITH ME, YOU BLOODY PSYCHOPATH.

“abhi toh bas ek chota dose diya hai jiska asar sirf 10 ghante rehta hai.”

oh how sweet. such a considerate husband. Star Parivaar Pati of The Year you are. haan behen, aur rakho aise pati ke liye karwachauth.

“agar baat nahi maaani, toh agla dose double hoga.”

seriously though, where can i get one of these? all i want is to be put in a coma so that i don't have to be conscious anymore. esp with the USA election today............ give me a 5x dose, daddy.

YEAH RIGHT LIKE SHE'S EVER GONNA CONSUME ANYTHING YOU OFFER HER EVER AGAIN LOL

“tum chaahe kitni bhi koshish karlo vansh, main tumhe ragini ko nuksaan pohunchaane nahi dungi.”

determination toh behen ka top classssssssssssss hai. where do ppl get such mental will from? i face the slightest inconvenience and i need a 6 hour nap to cope.

LMAO VANSH YOU DUMBASS YOU LEFT HER WITH HER PHONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. YOU KNOW SHE'S A SPY AND HAS SOMEONE ON THE OUTSIDE. YOU WANTED HER NOT TO GET TO RAGINI BUT NOW SHE CAN JUST CALL WHOEVER SHE’S WORKING WITH TO GET RAGINI THE HELP. GOD, BEWAKOOFON KI TOLI HAI YEH SHOWWWWWWWW.

ab yaad aayi kabir ki. my god, he seems like such a mellow weirdo now compared to vansh, just into some casual costume-changing and quasi fratricide. almost a tolerable level of deranged compared to this other fucking madman.

sent a voice note to him.

SHE HEARD SOMEONE COMING AND FLUNG THE PHONE ACROSS THE ROOM INTO A PILE OF CLOTHES. OH HO WHYYYYYYYYYYYY, YOU COULD HAVE LITERALLY JUST HID IT BACK UNDER THE PILLOWS WHERE YOU FOUND IT!?!?!??!?!?!?

“hi riddhima! tumhe iss haal mein dekh kar, dil ko bohut sukoon mil raha hai.”

asldkfsjflkjdslfkjdl i honestly love her the most. she's so fucking petty and hilarious.

ishani is like thank god bhai has seen fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinally seen your real face.

“sirf vansh ne hi nahi, inn sab mein maine bhi vansh ka asli chehra dekh liya hai.”

“kya matlab hai tumhara?!?!!”

ok, i'm thinking ishani is shadow girl. from day 1, she’s wanted riddhima to see vansh in a certain way; as someone dangerous, the way he projects himself. (as opposed to dadi and siya who want her to see his soft side.) this statement from riddhima makes her wary that did she get close to the actual truth. INTERESTING. VERYYYYYYYYY INTERESTINGGGGG.

she's now grumbling about how vansh treats her much better than she actually deserves. I REALLY WANT MORE INSIGHT INTO THIS BROTHER SISTER RELATIONSHIP THEY HAVE IT'S SO INTRIGUINGGGGGGGG

le, kapde chale gaye laundry. phone ke saath.

———————————————————————

precap: kabir listened to the voice note and now him and mummy are in panic about ragini disclosing the truth about 3 years ago. RE DEVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. OFC THESE TWO WERE INVOLVED IN THAT KAAND TOO. LITERALLY EVERY ONE IN THIS SHOW IS A DERANGED MENACE TO SOCIETY.

kabir coming to meet riddhima.

but ofc.

ugh she turned back saying “K.........” and he's like there's literally no one in this house whose name starts with K.

*facepalms for allllll eternity till my godforsaken face itself falls off.*

i think i’ll go watch s2 of mirzapur now. i need something ~~~light and fluffffffffffy~~~ to take my mind off whatever the FUCK this was.

#ishq mein marjawan 2 #immj2 #immj2 lbs #episode liveblogs

24 notes · View notes

seanfalco · 3 years

Note

makes perfect sense to me! :) i'm also ~very~ asexual but for some reason tend to really enjoy smutty fanfic? i'm not sure if i imagine myself being part of it while reading self inserts or it's something else. it's pretty confusing to me, tbh, because why would i take so much interest in it instead of just hooking up with someone and getting the real thing you know what i mean? idk if it's mere curiousity or it all just feels way better "on paper" than i does irl. so i was wondering- 1/2

so i was wondering what are your thoughts on this? i've seen many ace creators write/draw nsfw content and it's both interesting and confusing to me! what are your thoughts on that? how do u personally feel about the whole thing? coz i dont seem to figure it out for myself (like why do i take interest in this type of content as an ace) so maybe you have haha 2/2

———

I’ve asked myself these types of questions a lot actually bc it is hella confusing. And I think some of the allure of smut (at least for me) is that it’s fulfilling a fantasy that I sometimes wish I could have.

As long as I’m not personally in the equation and it’s two fictional characters gettin it on, I’m not uncomfortable with the thought of sex, and honestly like 75% of my daydreams are smutty lmao.

From everything I’ve read, asexuality is a spectrum, so everyone’s gunna have different experiences and different levels of comfort toward the thought of sex or p*rn or smut, etc. I had to look it up again bc I couldn’t remember the label, but there is a type of asexuality called “Fictosexual” where people only experience sexual attraction to fictional characters and I’ve read some peoples’ experiences and they sound very much like what I experience as well.

I hope that helps you make some sense of what you’re experiencing. But just know that it’s not weird and that you’re in the same (or similar) boats as a lot of us. 💛

#joz answers #anonymous #asexuality

7 notes · View notes

unproduciblesmackdown · 4 years

Note

let's do a classic Primez ask

thank you lol Prime Time is.....6 am is when im posting this, christ lol what else is new around here........Good Morning in advance lol and [rise and shine sailors it be monday]

2: Favorite book?

i don’t have one lol

3: Favorite fictional character?

i also don’t Properly have like, all-time ultimate Faves in these kind of categories either, but there’s still standouts at least lol......obviously lately it might show that i’m enjoying winston billions a lot, and natch that’s just One of the many wrol roles i’ve been glad to discover. natch winston, jared, and jeremy are fave raves amonth them

5: What’s your favorite fictional ship? (Canon or otherwise)

this is the same as the [fave fictional characters] thing in that like, sometimes i’ll Consume something where i don’t have any, and generally i’m out here multishipping and not like live or die by one Specific Pairing, if i like a character i’ll also probably like Many of their dynamic/s with various other characters, unless the options are That limited.......tying this in to the fave fictional character thing, re: winston, naturally tayston and benston, aka the fruits of us all combining our Genius, are top tier and here’s riawin where we don’t know for sure where it’s going but we’re getting some great Dynamic(tm) stuff anyways.....and natch re: jared i Enjoy Kleinsen (as something to make up ideas about that are outside canon and also as a perspective thru which to analyze canon) and re: jeremy.....stagedorks is beautiful, wild to have canon just give you some content that’s already as good as that

7: List 3 negative traits you have

well i can be fairly anxious about certain things, which is mostly negative for me lol.........a more negative 2-way street is that i’m just generally in defensive mode around people lol, often i’m like, just trying to avoid Attention entirely and/or like uh oh attention, gotta try to just avoid taking damage from it lol.......on a gradual journey to just being default More Unpleasant / less accommodating lmao......not that i can’t be sometimes, or that i can’t be Genuinely Friendly with randos coz i like their vibe and actually Like socializing lol.........and then re: the challenges of socializing, it seems like maybe when i’m in an interaction i get caught up in [uh oh how do i Respond a) at all b) in a way that’s Good(tm)] and it maybe makes me less attentive to the other person / a worse Listener smh

11: How do you decide when it’s time to cut someone out of your life for good?

idk luckily it’s not something i’ve had to do left and right lol.......but ime it’s Also not exactly like. usually a “ah Now Is The Time to have zero relationship with this person” and most often it’s like [gradual distancing period that is mostly passive] and/or just choosing Not to reinitiate any sort of relationship........though re: more active approaches lol it’s more like. time to try to tune into my [does this feel like something indefinitely sustainable / something you actually Want to have continue in any way] gauge or whatevs. and then still it’s like, sometimes easier if moments happen to come along that provide an [opt out?] choice presented to you kinda lol.........if it’s someone You don’t want to be involved with really but they don’t feel the same and it’s “on you” to decide to peace out at some point it’s more difficult coz such [do you want to opt out]-distilled Moments probably don’t seem to manifest but i think that’s a useful thing to be aware of in itself........i.e. that there’s not always going to be a Narrative-Friendly “point of no return” / clear Line Being Crossed and even if it Doesn’t feel like “i can’t / don’t want to deal with this for Literally one more day” that doesn’t mean you should totally stick it out / don’t have enough reason to decide that you are Done at this particular moment even if you haven’t been Done prior or think you plausibly hold off on it. don’t need to have some kind of story where you think if you Explained it to anyone or everyone it’d universally be understood and everything would applaud like “Yes, the Right Decision” lmao like. not their business....

13: What are your favorite lyrics currently?

well with our groupchat in the replies to that Eternally Crying Over The Bar Song post..........just enjoy the “stay here for a while / cuz it’s nice / cuz it’s holy” part of the refrain, a fun part of the music, and that classic iconis like, lyrics being in a sort of character Voice and yet getting the idea / feelings across effectively even when the words are sort of general or simple.......”shooting from the heart / but we’re all a lousy shot” is great lol and also “say you will always be here” ending with “for one more” is like, there’s another Broader Idea / Sentiment expressed so effectively :’|

17: If you could make a wish, what would you wish for if you knew it would come true?

i can’t do any fun answers lmao it’d just be like [political commentary] but that’s warranted lbr

19: How do you handle heartbreak? Is it something that’s easy for you to get over, or something you struggle with?

lmao i think it is like By Definition not easy for anyone to get over / Not struggle with.........can’t say i’ve had Romantic Misadventures exactly but uh yeah it feels bad to feel bad but i like......wait it out???? idk lmao you can’t really just timeskip past.....Heartbreak Sucks For Everyone Cuz That’s Kind Of The Whole Thing

23: What do you want your future to be like?

pandemic-less, fascism-less........i can’t say i’ve ever been someone like “yea i Know what i want to do and have this whole plan set out how i’m gonna do it lol” i remember when i was like 4 or 5 or whatever being asked What Do You Want To Do When You Grow Up and i was like “shit idk.......i like dinosaurs so i guess paleontologist??” and it was as much a mystery going forward.........always and still mostly playing things by ear with a few vague “if / then” type ideas......aren’t we all though ig

29: Do you think zodiac signs can influence someone’s personality to an extent?

what do i know but i Don’t like or respect the recent years trend ppl being way into it like this isn’t [being really serious about hogwarts houses] or Earnest Myer Briggs Types energy that everyone’s bringing to it......like what are you getting out of trying to be this Prescriptive based on when ppl’s parents got into it. meanwhile i’ve been on the edge of my seat since someone tweeted about “when will we get the first astrology discrimination lawsuit” re: a story about ppl wanting a housemate with a certain sign for compatibility reasons. and like again if it Is like “yes there are time-of-year Personality Types for Objective Real” like. okay, still, what is this Approach that ppl have....doing for anyone.....

31: What does ‘self care’ look like for you?

not very fancy lol i’ll be like “damn i think i haven’t eaten today” and then do it......or be like hey here i’m gonna Do A Stretch or some shit. walk around. step outside if it’s nice. both true that Self Care has inherent limitations re: like we can’t just cancel out all the detriments to our wellbeing via Personal Choices and yet also we can’t Not look out for ourselves how we can......i’ll watch something that i Enjoy. or just knock out if it’s like “christ i need a mood reset” or i’m trying to timeskip through a headache. pet a cat. i like to try to be Appreciative of everyday ordinary shit......also messing around Making Stuff whether drawings or otherwise can be a good helpful use of time, i like talking to people who i like talking to, and other stunning stuff like that lol

37: Have you ever been surprised by someone staying in your life?

not really lol coz again with how i’m pretty slow to realize that someone is like, nonzero actively interested in interacting with me on a regular basis, and then once someone’s In My Life there’s no particular point where i go “whoa....You’re still here??”......ig sometimes there’s like, Friendly Acquaintances where it’d be Unsurprising if they just sort of dropped fully out of the orbit but they do not

41: How do you show you care?

hmm i sure like to do ppl favors / give them gifts / help them out w/ whatever, hang out / generally be Around them where like, doing [parallel tasks] works i.e. maybe we’re doing different things but in the same room.....just like to Talk and all and listen to ppl and Learn Things About Them, try to pick up stuff re: ways that ppl express like “hey to me it conveys Being Cared About when ppl do ___”........food/cooking is a love language......that thing where shit you’d be way too anxious to do on your own For Yourself is like, oh i’m absolutely gonna do it on behalf of someone i care about.......all this stuff is more like, Possible in person lmao rip. i Care you guys

43: Which of the seven deadly sins do you feel represents you the most?

who is your hellsona and what is their origin story (how they got condemned to hell).........if i’m irritable / argumentative am i wrathful? you could presumably someone saying yep it is inherently the one deadly sin of lust if you’re queer.......at any given time i’m passed out and dreaming about “fuck capitalism and the protestant work ethic” and that’s sloth i guess. and okay i went “who named an animal after a The Deadly Sin as if it’s like ‘wow fuck this animal for choosing not to zoom around as though they could and i apparently think that they should’ tf” and in looking it up i immediately learned the Sloth Fact that apparently their shits are insane and also the most dangerous thing they do?? like they poop only maybe once a week and All At Once so that a single dump might knock off a third of their total weight........and it’s pretty much the only time they leave the upper branches of trees, in that they crawl down to hold on to the trunk and take this monster shit and naturally they’re not great on the ground so Pooping is like the leading cause of death for sloths in the wild. and i think they ought to be named after that.

47: What are you passionate about?

oh man [i am passionate a lot.mp3] lol.........always having a variety of Interestes which i like to talk about / potentially make things about.......decent amount of subjects i like to learn things about even if i’m bad at like, actually learning things generally lmao, what’s Not losing focus on shit.......idk it’s not that hard for me to like go off about Whatever, got these jack of all trades interests / areas of Some knowledge, i’m opinionated and probably have something (extensive) to say about anything as just part of my charm lol, and just in general i can get Enthused / worked up about things..........also passionate about various [niche gay shit] things eternally. whoms among us isn’t

#let's see if my genius plan of [lie down and try to nap and also try to wake up circa noon] works.....#employed that the other day Yet Also was like ''i Will finish this drawing today'' which entailed staying up till like 7-8am so.......

2 notes · View notes

niel-trbl · 4 years

Text

Fight for Our Way

Note: It’s nice to write again after awhile. Had this idea during one of my cousins’ wedding few months back! It was a great wedding but I didn’t feel that great and that’s okay. Drop me an ask here!

Song Inspiration: Fight for this Love // Cheryl Cole

Your relatives have never questioned you about your love life. Not that it ever bothered you or anything. It was the sort of weird thing where they’d turn to your siblings asking that question but when it came to you, they’d just smile apologetically to you and move on. This went on for so many years at every family gathering. Because of that, you’ve never talked about your significant other or just relationship things in general. So the day you brought your partner, Chan, to your cousin’s wedding (of ALL days), it came as a shock to everyone.

Despite the initial shock that everyone was going through, they never utter or ask a single thing at all. Instead, they kept their eagle eyes on Chan. Being the black sheep of the family (you), they sure did judge him the same way they did with you. Chan was different. He was the type that would never fit into the mould that they had created, similarly like you.

They thought you would’ve at least followed your siblings or the rest of your cousins and found someone who at least met their criteria. Someone with ‘natural’ hair and probably has a job in an ‘important’ industry as they envisioned - business, finance, education, government sector or law. But Chan isn’t any of the above. In fact, he was absolutely different from all of your cousins’ partners.

Chan does music as his career - this, of course, shocked your relatives. Without any of them saying it out loud, you already know what they were thinking - how do you earn a living from doing entertainment? How is the Arts industry a career option? Honestly, been through it all and still am going through it now. That’s how you know. Chan had earrings hanging from his ears and bright blonde curls with a bit of his natural roots peeking through. Despite his tough-looking exterior, he’s definitely the softest man you’ve known. He’s so gentle, kind-hearted and well-mannered. He knew the way he look may scare people so he always made a point to reach out to people first. But of course, your relatives didn’t care for any of that. No matter what, he was definitely not the type your relatives want their child’s partner to look like.

But that’s all the more why you love Chan. He was nothing like the rigid mould that your family had set up. And he understood you unlike anybody else. When you asked him to join you at your cousin’s wedding, you lowkey wished he would say no. You didn’t want him to suffer under the criticisms of your relatives. But he still went through with it despite knowing the reason! He put in so much thought and effort just for today - all of that just for you. That was when you knew you were lucky to meet him and wished that he’s the one you will spend your life with.

“Don’t worry. Just let them say whatever they want. We got our parents’ approval and that’s all that matters. You’re doing great,” he whispered before kissing your temple.

“Thank you for being here, with me,” your eyes studied the facial features of your lover as you held onto his hand.

“It’s nothing. You know I’ll be there for you. I just can’t wait for that to be us,” he gestured towards your cousin and their now-spouse.

Throughout the years you’ve known Chan, you knew he never saw himself getting married to anyone, well neither do you. It was something you always kept in the back of your mind when you got into this relationship with him. So hearing Chan somewhat implying about marriage, it really took you by surprise.

“What?” your eyes grew wide.

“I know I always said I don’t see marriage in my life but I see it with you. I’m not saying this just coz we’re at a wedding. I really want to spend life with you,”

“Are you proposing to me right now Bang Chan?”

“Is it too much? Or too fast?”

“If it’s you, it’s never too much or too fast,”

“Thank you. But I still want to do a proper proposal. The day I do that, I just need you to say yes,” he wrapped his hands around yours then planted a soft kiss on your knuckles.

“I know it’s gonna be tough. With your judgemental relatives and whatnot, just know that I’m gonna be there all the way with you. We’ll go through everything together. You won’t be alone,”

With that came the commencement of the dinner buffet. Chan insisted on getting food for you with your father so you just mingled around for a bit. One of your great aunts gestured for you to go over to her, in which you did. You don’t see her as often since she doesn’t go out that much due to her age. But when you do, you try to make it a point to have a chat with her.

“I just met that little friend of yours. Very sweet and kind boy,” she complimented him - something you didn’t expect to hear.

“Oh! Well, I think I’m just very lucky to meet him,”

“Funny you said that - he said the same exact thing. Hold on tight to him and don’t care about what your nosy relatives have to say. Just fight for it! I know they don’t see him as their so-called ‘in-law material’ but I say otherwise. If they’re going to oppose to it, say that I gave you my blessing. That ought to keep them in their place,” you did something you have never done to any of your relatives - an actual, proper hug!

Just in time, Chan came back with plates of food with your father so you left to head back to your table. After settling down, he finally took a seat beside you then asked who you talked to earlier.

“That was my great aunt. Apparently, you made a very good impression on her,”

“Oh yeah I met her earlier. Very sweet lady,” he managed to say in between of shoving the food in his mouth and complimenting it.

“And, she told me something pretty interesting too. I guess we aren’t alone in this afterall,” you beamed at Chan.

#stray kids scenarios #bang chan scenarios #chan scenarios #stray kids scenario #bang chan scenario #chan scenario #stray kids #bang chan #chan #skz

22 notes · View notes

kunalkarankapoor · 4 years

Video

To , Kunal Karan Kapoor I Want to Say That you are very special person When I saw you first time and now you are my inspiration I learn from your politeness, how to be happy always and my love for photography has increased when I saw your clicks and superb photos first most important thing is you are very nice and beautiful nature person I love your simplicity as Kunal Karan Kapoor you are Amazing and Precious for us and for those who loves you and Now you are a part of my life I love , like and respect you a lot The way you are Stay like that because you are Awesome Dear Kunal Karan Kapoor My love for you is unconditional so love you a lot stay happy , stay healthy , keep shining , keep smiling , and stay successful always. My love and prayer are always with you From , Jannat 😘

In NENJAM PESUTHY ❤️..... your every single expressions are killed me ...... especially that eye contact😍😍😍😍 .your eyes, smile, acting even hairstyle your everything mesmerizing🥰🥰🥰🥰 me.kunal your the my endless first love ever ..... still now ❤️❤️❤️. The raikar case in this series i can't understand the language ...but even I am watching it because only for u Nobody can ever take your place in my heart.you make me happy for your acting like no one else can.all my everlasting love is for you on this special occasion ever and ever. May you enjoy all the good things life has to offer handsome man😘 ......On this special month and all the years to follow be filled with joy and endless happiness! @elakkiyadayanidhi

Hiii Spiderman 😍 There are no words to Tell you How Much I loving you… first time I saw you in Nenjam Pesuthey… I am Started to Obsessed with you… I am Speechless About You and Your hard work, Acting Skill, Expressions, Style, Innocence, Attitude, etc. I just loving your all the things… You are very Talented, Inspirational Artist.. I love your Travelling, Photography… I learned lots of Things from You.. You are Amazing.. You are Unique.. You are Precious.. You are a Masterpiece…

You are My first Crush…❤When I saw Your Crying Scenes, I am automatically getting tears on my eyes…Your Smile always bring a Smile to My face.. You are My Stress Buster. You are Very Special to Me.. You Mean to Me a lot.. I am Very happy to be your fan.. My biggest dream is seeing you at least once in My Life Time.. I am Waiting for that Precious day in My Life… You are The Best. No One Can Replace Your Place… I just Want to See you in Big Screen. Love You Lots❤ Keep Smiling Always🤗 _Siddh_Guna

Kunal ..this name has a magic in my life ..this name always brings a blush, a cheerful smile, a love in my heart..Kunal I have told this many times my love for you was not love at 1st sight...I slowly started liking you then started loving you..over these years ur the last face I see b4 I go to sleep and 1st to see when I wake up..Your more than anything to me..you were there for me when i was stressed and when i cried..u were my medicine..you were and you will ever be my Happy pill..I always dreamt a happy life with u together and a still dream..I want to be ur travel buddy, a companion like book..a best friend..a soul mate. Wish to spend a lifetime with u!. atleast please spend a 24 hours with me..I will make ur fav Idly podi, Rajama Chawal, Bindi...we can have many things discussed over a coffee, a scotty ride around Chennai or Mumbai (I ll ride u)...I am not gonna talk about ur acting coz I always do that.. I love you as always I loved u may be even more...Always Kunal's Maya....

Hii Kunal!!!!! There is an Lot of things in my mind to tell about you....but the time is not enough to tell about you because you are the only one for my whole happiness in the world...first time I sawed you in the Nenjam Pesuthey serial... continuously I watched the serial that serial impress me a lot bcoz of your style, attitude, Expression, dressing sense etc....lot of things express me more... whenever I saw your any pics videos that time I thought I just want to see you in my life..I want to spend time with you...when will that lovely time??? I love your traveling photography...it's totally awesome....And your humble speech in interviews it's totally nice...that simplicity in you that I love very much....my love for you never fade... I love you I loved you I will love you forever ❤️ I just want to see you in more films and serials...that is the only way to make everyone happy... love you KKK💛🖤 KKK_hardfan

Dear Kunal sir I am Shreyashi, one of your biggest and craziest fan of yours. I don't know crazy word is suitable or not because I never done any crazy thing for my favourite hero or anyone. I really love every character you played. After so many years now I got a chance to see Remix. Now I'm watching the show. I love it. After Mohan Bhatnagar you came into our life as shaurya urmi sinha & Krishna Sikhawat. Though both characters came into our life for too short but it took place in our hearts. After this I always feel that now if you will back on screen, then you will be back with a bang, and you did it. You come back to our life as Mohit Naik Raikar. I am seriously speechless. From introduction to end you give justice to the character. Specially the breakdown scene in the last episode is mind blowing. I never think that someday Mohan Bhatnagar will somehow fade from my mind & heart and any other character took the place but yes now Mohit took the whole place of my heart & can't get over from him & I'm not complaining. A big congratulations for your debut in web series. I really love your eyes which speaks a lot & also your sharp nose & long messy hair. In onscreen when you cry, you made us cry. When you laugh you made us laugh. Your simplicity connect audience towards him. As Mohan says "simplicity me hi sundarta hay" Though this line said by Mohan but you in real life or reel life perfectly follow this. That's why we never feel that you act in a scene, it's so natural to us. Love you a lot. Your fan Shreyashi

First Time I saw you in Nenjam Pesuthey (NBTNMKK) I was really really really Obsessed with you... I don't know how to Express my words...Words can't describe my feelings for you...I hope Express my words well... Mohan Character was inspires me lots...Wowwww Your Acting and expressions killing us... You lived your character... Your Hard Work, Acting, Travelling, Photography, books Reading and Everything inspires me a lots... I leaned Many things from you...I love your personality, Simplicity, Calmness, humbleness, Childish Behaviour, Attitude and Everything...❤ You Impressed me With Your Magical Eyes - Wowwww Those Two Eyes are Express Many Words... 🙈You Messy Hairs - I just wanna to touch it... Your Sharp Nose Oops!!! Slanting Nose Love it😍 Your Magnetic Smile - That can help me Many Ways.. Your Body Language and Your Stylish Walk I Love it... Thank God for having a great person in the world...🙏 Whenever I feel like very Sad I just see your videos and photos.... It's just Cheer Me up well.. Because you are the person who kills all my pains and sorrow...You are My Pain killer of my all the problems...You are My Happiness...You are the Best...No One Can Ever Replace Your Place...You Having a Special Place in My Heart...❤ Love You...❤ I don't Know how much I love you...❤ Iam being Lucky to be Your Fan...❤ I just wanna to see you in big screen...Keep Rocking...😎 Stay Safe... kunalkarankapoorhugefan

Who is Kunal Karan Kapoor for me.

The one who despite of many characters in NBT grabs all the attention towards him. That attention is you Kunal Karan Kapoor. The one to who, I can’t explain in words. There must be number of fans, who feel the same. I am also one of them. There are three words that I feel define Kunal Karan Kapoor Humble - Genuine - Grounded. Whenever I watch his interviews and listen to him, my respect and love for him increase. The one who’s interviews always makes me happy and after watching those interviews, every time I find something interesting. That Happiness is you Kunal Karan Kapoor. The one who’s smile makes me happy in every situation. His smile is the reason of my smile. That reason is you Kunal Karan Kapoor. The first thought of the day is and the last thought of the day is you Kunal Karan Kapoor. I couldn’t say that he is my whole world but yes, he helps in making the world a better place. Keep spreading the positivity and keep inspiring many with your work. The one for whom a girl has no knowledge of Instagram, twitter and other social sites. But after watching his shows, made a fan page just to remain in touch with him. That change in me is you Kunal Karan Kapoor. The one, after seeing that he is liking everybody’s post except mine, makes me sad sometimes. But when he posts something new in his account. I forget everything and becomes happy again. That one sides “rotna & maan jana” is for you Kunal Karan Kapoor ❤️ From Saira with lots of love ❤️❤️❤️

Dear Kunal sir, I am a big fan of yours. I love your beautiful journey from Varun to Mohit. Your all characters are so close to my heart.I love your acting skills, the way you delivered your dialogue so natural.I always appreciate your works for your honest performance.I am so so so happy to see you as Mohit Naik Raikar after so long. Everyone is appreciating your work as Mohit Naik Raikar.Your works and dedication always make us feel proud .You inspires us not only as an actor but also as a traveller and photographer. As someone said, you and your camera always create magic together. You are a joy to be around and always making those around you even happier that's why your all friends like your company so much.You are precious. I love everything about you from looks to personality.If anything good happened to me during the lockdown, that was your live sessions. I love your all live sessions. Your smile is enough to make us smile.I can't Stop admiring you how much i love your work.Keep entertaining us with your talent.My feelings for you can never fit in such limited words.I will remain your fangirl forever and will always support you as your number 1 die heart fan. Lots and lots and lots of love......Aarti

You are not older -you are just more distinguished. Dear kunal, It is pure magic when you find some1 with a beautiful, kind soul. U have a captivating personality . Your interests n conversations n the atmosphere u create around them ... all of them is worth writing . Dear kunal, May ur coming year be filled with magic n dreams n good madness. I hope u read some fine books n kiss someone who thinks ur wonderful, n dont forget 2 make some art-act , write or draw or sing or live as only u can .. And I hope somewhere in the next year.. you surprise yourself. I'm so grateful dat u came in2 the world because u make my world better everyday. Loads of love n best wishes. Anu

Honestly, I don't know why but I have some emotional attachment with you.....though we are far miles away and have not met anytime,I have the feeling of heart to heart connection when I look at you...Bcoz you are the most amazing person on this planet I have ever seen in my life....your simple living, 'always smiling'😊☺️outfit which you always wear on your cute face gives me lot of energy to live happily in this stressful life ❤️😍...I always try to learn how to take risks and to get over through keeping your thoughts in my mind and believe me I always get through....so you are my direct and indirect biggest inspiration rather you are my ideal figure for me...the way you get connected to people not only through acting but with your down to earth Personality, kindness, generosity is the most amazing and precious qualities that can be rarely find in a person but you are undoubtedly on the top most level..and I am pretty sure that no one can beat this...no one😍...Apart from this....I always fell in love with your beautiful and damn expressive eyes, your top of the world cutest Smile and not least of all these that your unruly,messy but loved curly hair...💕💕...and all these feelings are from the moment I watched you and I was badly in search of a good platform from where I could have been share my true feelings,love and a lot of respect for YOU...You as a Simple and Sweet person, You as a Brilliant Versatile Actor,You as a complete Artist,You as a Best Photographer,You as a Best Traveller And You as Everything to me...You and only You....and I by my strong luck I found this platform most suitable where I just wanted to share what true feeling I have for you and for lifetime....and infact after life also 💕💜💞..... Sharvari Sathe

Kunal Karan Kapoor- A Ray Of Sunshine To All Fans Hi sir, Today, when I sat down to write down something for you as a token of appreciation as a fan, I found myself in shortage of words to express your personality and your brilliant performances as an Actor..... Kunal sir, you are unbelievably outstanding in each n every character you portray. Your amazing expressions in those angelic eyes speaks thousands words without speaking them.. I can only say, sir, you nail your's each n every performance with sheer perfection and emote with beauty and magnificence to bring life to the character's.. Your determination, ability to work hard n exploring new creative hobbies as traveling n photography have inspired a lot... KEEP GROWING SIR... BE BLESSED ALWAYS N FOREVER... LOADS OF RESPECT AND BEST WISHES...Suchismita Mishra

Kunal Sir...I am a big fan of yours because of your personality. Sir you are just awesome in every stage of acting specially your emotional scenes touches my heart ❤️❤️❤️ soo much... I am also like your photography & it's too good Sir 👌 👌 👌. You are the Superstar in my heart forever... Rinima Bharadwaj

DEAR KUNAL, I have never believed in love at first sight . I started believing it blindly since I first saw you on my television..It still feels so fresh the moment I saw you for the first time.. I guess you are a magician ...you mesmerized me completely that I can't take my eyes out of you and your acting....The love I have for you and your acting will never end ....I love all your performances ... specially as Mohan ...That's you who brought Mohan into life by your acting....This is what I love more when it comes to your acting ,. You just bring the character into life that it just sticks to viewers mind as a glue .... Recently I read many of your interviews ...and while reading I felt like I was talking to someone I really knew....THIS is the bond you create with your fans ..your simplicity and down to earth nature is making me kinda go crazy it's bringing more love for you in me. You ..as a person,as an actor you mean a lot to us (fans) I always proudly say that I'm a great fan of not only an actor but also of a person ..most beautiful person by heart .... And you look awesome when you smile....so keep smiling always ... Wish you reach great heights . LOVE YOU KUNAL KARAN KAPOOR..my super hero.... With love Swetha ♥️

Hi kUNAL ji❤, I would like to share my love with You. I saw you for the first time in NENJAM PEASUTHE ...The mind yearns to see you constantly. To this day, there is no limit to the love I have for you. Because of your acting ability... The words your eyes speak, Your subconscious smile, your cute voice, your polite speech, your beautiful heart of love all deepen the love hold over you...😇The one who roles the fans with your acting ability. Words cannot describe your acting ability to engage and act... If you do not give your series in tamil, I would never have felt you and your love. I just want to say that this is the greatest blessings I have received in my life...Heartfelt thanks to @karanbkapoor sir🙏Many thanks to you for giving him to this world and to us. You have to live with health and happiness sir...Kunal ji, I love all Your photography 📷 Everything is subtle. And the way you like it will be awesome. Your photos makes me even more. Sometimes you have been my teacher too. Because there is so much to learn from you. God's blessings will always be with you kunal ji✨. I pray to God that you live with the same smile, health, longevity forever. I am immensely glad that I am an ardent fan of yours. I still love you so much KUNALKARANKAPOOR ji❤ Gowse Michael

Dear Kunal, Since I have been watching your serials, videos and interviews, I have realized many things about you from those and I really admire you for all those qualities💕. I have noticed that you are a very decent, sober and shy person. You are very sweet and polite, but an introvert at the same time. I love your simplicity🤗 and your magnetic and dynamic personality🔥. Your lovely smile makes me want to smile.😍 The way you keep yourself busy with travelling💼, photography📷, reading📖 and music🎧, I too love doing all this. Your photography skills are superb and everytime you post, whatever it is, be it a picture clicked differently in a creative way, or a picture of the sky or of rains🌧, or anything, I always love it and the updates make me really happy even in the saddest of times.😊 Besides all this, I am sure that you are a very good son. I can see the beautiful bonding between you and your father in your pictures. God bless you both. Stay blessed always.With love ❤ Priya.

Kunal sir. I'm a big fan. I want to meet directly one time. And Na bole tum na maine kuch kaga is my favorite one. I watched this again and again only for ur different performance in one serial. 1. Love and caring family man 2.Type of Business man. 3.Rude vasu but same love for meena All r so superb. Especially most important of every husband and wife is Love. U r so cute and handsome reaction for the series.. U r the only person suits the character Mohan bhatnagar. My hero. Have a wonderful year ahead💓💓💓 @sowmimayilsamy

Kunal is like an anaconda. He just surrounds us by his innocent gestures and then start to tighten up with his acting skills. He was one of the few actors who could perform any character in effortless manner. Nenjam pesuthey was my fav of his tv series. I would be happy if he could do a movie in tamil. There were many fans waiting for that moment (including me). Praveen De @crazyking_at_bluezone

Kunal is an expression king. He knows very well how to steal heart of the viewers.. He occupying full heart and our memories whenever we think about him some happiness surrounded us and make us smile... Sometimes his eyes become drug to forget everything and only thing about him... I like his nose very much and his hair eyebrows everything... Whenever he gets angry his eyes shrinks and his look so wow..😍😍😍😍His humor sense was outstanding... If I had an apportunity to meet him that's my most memorable day in my life... And I surely get a tight hug from him that's how much I love him... I wanted him to come back in any show... No one can replace his place in my heart memory phn and even my password... ❤❤Happy happy happy to my sweetheart❤❤❤❤❤... evlo per kunal apro vandhalum no one can replace his place in my heart memory phn and even my password ❤️❤️ kunal is an expression king ....he knows very well how to steal heart of the viewers...he occupying full heart and our memories whenever we think about him some happiness surrounded us and make us smile ....sometimes his eyes becomes drug to forget everything and only think about him _Dev @_devil_corpse

MY JOURNEY WITH KUNAL KARAN KAPOOR One day when I was watching one of our regional channel I came across a serial ‘MOUNAMELANOYI’ means ‘WHY THIS SILENCE DEAR’. I got attracted to the male character Mr.Mohan Bhatnagar. At that point of time I don’t know nothing about him even his original name. Then unfortunately due to unknown reasons the serial has been stopped in the midway. So I started searching for the serial in Hindi where I came across this great show of an unusual love story NBTNMKK. First I became a very big fan of Mohan. It’s through Mohan I came to Know about Kunal Karan Kapoor. A big thanks to Mohan who introduced me to KKK. Mohan taught me two things through his character. First is ‘Never give up’ and the second one is the unconditional and flawless love. I started watching all his other shows and his interviews with his co-star Akanksha Singh. Kunal is a versatile actor who has shown versatility in all his characters.I love his negative character as Angad Yadav with paan in his mouth. I loved Yudi in LRL. I fell in love with Madonna. He is sooo beautiful and lovely. And the best part is the suicide scene. I get goosebumps whenever I watch it. He has portrayed it sooo well.

Kunal Karan Kapoor expressions are simple superb. He has a good talent Of expressing his feelings, emotions, anger and love with his eyes. It’s a God given talent where nobody can do it. I love Shaurya in DAK. Inspector Krishna Shekhawat in WAS Varun in Remix. Amrik Singh in RSB. Sukhi Singh in Maayka. Monty in MMDB. Lawyer Subhash in a Music album ADDA. As a deaf and mute parent in Pregakem AD, and he has done a voice over for the show Bhindi. I am also a big fan of his photography. He is an amazing photographer. I love him not only as an amazing and flawless actor but also as person. I love his respect towards women in his life. He is sooo humble, honest and down to earth.He has taken a long gap that I was desperately and eagerly waiting for his come back. He came like a roaring lion with a WEBSERIES called THE RAIKAR CASE as Mohit Naik Raikar. Now I am sooo emotionally attached to Mohit that gives tears in my eyes. Kunal has portrayed it sooo well with his expressions and his flawless acting.

On August 22nd 1982 a shining star was born who has changed my life and whom I lovingly call him Kunal Beta. Vadlapudi Latha

Kunal Karan Kapoor sir.... I am you are big fan and I am watching one show of yours. In that one show your acting, romance, angry and crying. It was so awesome its none other than na bole Tum show. It was so awesome....not only in show Really ur looking so handsome.... My only one wish not only mine this is all ur fans wish also that is we all want to meet you and take one pic with you this is silly wish that know but this was the wish from ur all fans. Sir live healthy and happy.... We all want to see you again in many shows.... Kunal karan kapoor fans are waiting. KunalKaranKapoorfc

I really happy writeup the message with special person Kunalji. First time I see the Kunalji in Na Bole Tum Na Maine Kuch Kaha {nenjam pesuthe}promo.That time I was too young in 8th class I totally addicted with Kunalji in first look I know Kunalji is best actor in every scene the performances is so well and mind blowing actor in Tellywood industry. The Kunalji is negative role in Na Bole Tum (part 2) is powerful act. The Kunalji eyes is so powerful talk with many things. I love kunalji eyes, hair, smile, voice and everything. Kunalji is amazing and my most favorite person. I see the Kunalji face really change the mood and automatically smile come to my face. You are something I cannot describe with words you are my everything proudly I say I am your biggest fan By your heartly fan ANGEL

Hi kunal Karan Kapoor sir(chociii boy), I am from Tamilnadu. I am Ur biggest fan Na Bole Tum Na maine kuch kaha series in Tamil dubbed NENJAM PESUTHE serial... I am watch only that serial because you... I am always your biggest fan... Your smile, cute look, style, bike style, romance, love failure looking, your speech, your plain kiss, you tell Tamil vanakam, romantic, etc... I love that all... KKK fans again watch for u please come to series... All fans waiting for that beautiful moment... I watched Ur all serial because I love u more more more.... Deepak

Hii kunal karan kapoor sir...🔥🔥🔥 your my most favorite person and actor forever sir....☺️☺️keep smiling always.... Stay blessed and live long with full of happiness...always keep rocking sir....😘😘 waiting to see u on screen again with awesome new project sir❤ ...All the best for everything in your life... I am die hard fan of yours.. from Chennai... you are the only person who I love the most in this world..I don't know the reason why ...❤️ when I am was 12 years old 1st time I seen you in nenjam pesuthey (2013) on pomiler TV... I was really obsessed with you...there are no words to tell you how much I love you.... ❤️❤️❤️❤️ I most addicted to mohan character❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️..... you are amazing...I don't know how to explain my words... words can't Express my feelings for you... you are my most inspired person in world.. my biggest dream is to see you at least once in my life time 🔥🔥❤️❤️.. you are the best...spiderman... no can replace your place...😘😘...I love your expressions,talent,simplicity,travelling, etc.. you are the bestest human being in the world...❤️❤️❤️ specially I love your eyes, hair... I love everything... I would love to support for u... I will there for u... my love forever for u... love you the most.. you are my most favorite person in the world....❤️❤️❤️ After na bole tum serial... I loved to see u on doli armaanon ki and woh apna sa in 2018 serial.... sir u have do both the serial awesome and amazing...❤❤😘😘 then in 2020 we loved to see u on screen in THE RAIKAR CASE series. One of the best one I have never seen❤ i love it it's amazing ...😍😍...It's is a differend type family secret web series even full of secrets and thriller and so much interesting 🔥🔥🔥

Kunal karan kapoor sir is always king of expression 🔥🔥❤❤no one can replace his acting forever🤩🤩 It's awesome and amazing acting of kunal sir❤❤ I love his acting ❤🔥🔥🤩🤩 he is best actor 😍😍 MOHIT NAIK RAIKAR 🔥🔥 he done his role awesome I am waiting for season 2🤗🤗 sir .... kunal sir all ur funs r waiting to see u in on screen again with a awesome and amazing project ❤❤ we all ur funs r waiting very eagerly sir❤❤❤..❤❤ Subasri from Chennai

Kunal Karan Kapoor is the person who talks with eyes, rather than words.Whenever he is in certain character it doesn’t feel like he is acting. Everything looks soo real. Whenever he is acting happy/sad or crying or with any other co-stars, he is just perfect. His photography inspires me alot. How can anyone be soo perfect, it’s amazing...I wish to God, no evil eye wud ever bother you and you get whatever you wishes for. With lots and lots of love. Neha

After nbt I have seen many other shows and movies... But the impact a good show has on you is quiet long lasting that I only celebrate mohan megha and their love for these many years... I've become such like that when people say my name immediately the nearby one addresses as Mohan meena(megha) mental 🤭 looks funny but it has that impact on me... I still look ahead for a bit of Mohan in all the males I happen to meet... I see him as a father, brother, friend, betterhalf, well-wisher and many more... And what else... I may not have met him but he is a part of my life in each and every phase of it... Secondly kunal is a step ahead of mohan... If I want a life partner like mohan I want a friend like kunal... He is such an inspiration for everyone... In the way he lives... Who lives a life of his dreams... Only very few... Other do a job and live a life of others choice... He acts for profession according to his wish... Travels and clicks everything for his passion and enjys it too..And hence he is always loved and is an inspiration for everyone either on screen or off screen... Hence he is the best person one could ask for... I wish he always has this happiness and peace throughout his life... Wishing him a very happy birthday 🎂 ❤️ 💐 With lots of love. Janani @_._kunaksha__fandom_._

Hi Kunal sir... I'm Sowbarnika... I'm a big fan of you.. For the time I saw you in nenjam pesuthe (na bole tum na meina kuch kaga)... U r such an amazing actor... There will be no need of any dialogue for Bcz ur eyes itself enough... U didn't acted u lived as those characters... I watched ur web series #theraikarcase ur acting was mind blowing.... Really u r eyekiller...Whenever I see ur picture or hear anything about u will automatically bring a blush n smile on my face... Ur smile n voice is the only thing which makes me glad n relaxed whenever I feel sad or alone... U r an energy booster n my inspiration of mine... I love ur photographies... There is no words to express my feelings... Not only me there are lots of fan for u in South India especially in Tamil Nadu... Please sir do one South Indian film... It's a biggest request from ur Tamil fans. Love u a lotsss.. Like every Kunal fans I also have a dream to meet u... I wish this yr will bring u full of success and happiness.. Always be happy handsome. Keep rocking... We all are waiting to see u onscreen soon... Wish u a very happy B-Day in advance.... Keep smiling n spread positive vibes through ur smile... Lub u a lottttt my dr handsome chocoboy.... kunaaksha._.addictz

Kunal oh god, you are so handsome. I remember the first time I saw you on tv that was like in nbtnmkk, My God you totally nailed the performance and I did not even know your name until this quarantine, which gave me this opportunity to watch your lovable series again. Nbtnmkk the role you’ve played makes me wanna have a love story like that. Akanksha is so lucky to have had a co actor like you ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ Man, I don’t know if you know you are a pure gold. So pure I wish you great life ahead man, but I am sorry I haven’t gotten enough time to see The Raikar Case, as I have been preparing for medical entrance, but I promise you I will watch it asap ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ and ya you’re gold. you are every freaking jewellery. Hope you will find your soulmate soon Kunal sir. From Nepal ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ Your greatest fan @pr4nita

நான் உன்னை திரையில் கண்ட நாள் முதல் என் கண் இமைகளில் புகுந்து விட்டாய் 😘 காதல் என்ற உணர்வை எந்தன் இதயத்தில் உன் கண்களால் இயற்றிவிட்டாய் எனது கனவுக்கு காரணம் நீ என் காதலுக்கு அடையாளம் நீ 😘😘இன்னும் வார்த்தைகள் இல்லை நீ என் வாழ்க்கையின் எல்லை உன்னை தேடி வந்து சந்திப்பதே என் லட்சியம் 🥰🥰🥰i love u kunal -

You entered my eyes since the day I saw you on screen You lighted up /made the feeling of love in my heart by your eyes.. Reason behind my dream is you... Symbol of my love is you.. Words are less You are the limit of my life.. My ambition is to come and meet you.. I LOVE YOU kunal - Janani Arumugam

What should i say about you...for now i will only say that my love for you(Kunal) is more than the amount of water an ocean can hold and also more than vastness of the blue sky. I pray from the core of my heart that you forever remain untouched by any problem and you always happy in your life 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹- Tanuja Dash (@tanujadash022)

Mr. Kunal Karan Kapoor... My friends and I became a huge huge fan of you after watching " Naa Bole Tum Na Maine Kuch Kaha " serial which was telecast in Tamil... There was not even a single day which went without speaking about you, during those school days. You captured our heart, SpiderMan❤️ Thank you so much for adding a charming chapter in my boring schoolhood. Wishing you all the happiness in the world. Wishing you a very happy birthday... With love, Aarthy @aarthy_chandran

Mr Kunal Karan Kapoor... I first saw him play Cadet Yudi Sahni in LRL and even though that has been his only show I watched him acting in...I knew from the first time that he was a very capable and amazing actor. The way he expresses through his eyes and tries to do justice to every role is commendable. I also saw him in the Raikar Case and can absolutely say he is a brilliant actor. His poise, his dialogue delivery, his ability to breath life into the characters he plays his remarkable. Yudi although was not the main focus on LRL...one can't help but smile at his impish charms and his childlike antics and innocence which was so precious and pure. His character development in Lrl from a determined yet lost young man to a confident, focused solider is worth mentioning. Yudi played by KKK really comes in his own by the end of lrl season 1. Also in real life Kunal sir seems a very genuine, polite, well mannered and courteous man ...all such admirable and precious qualities..I heard in an iv of Rajeev Khandelwal sir that Kunal sir used to have alot of fun with other on lrl sets and was a prankster. To sum up I'd say...I would love to watch of all his acting as he is one of the promising actors of our generation✨Yudi was definitely one of the most endearing and charming characters i saw on itv all thanks to Kunal sir. Hope he keeps doing good work like he does😀✨Also his comic timing in lrl was off the charts...so good😀😁...he was so entertaining and hilarious as " Madonna" and he never looked prettier😅😁🤣but jokes aside he rightfully deserves all the praise for his acting ability and For being the charismatic and mysterious gentleman he is😊 Amisha @leftrightleftfanpage

Hai Kunal sir. I'm your biggest fan from TamilNadu. I like your acting in NenjamPesuthe. It was so cute as like you. You are an expression king.please Comeback...My heart is getting stealed while watching you ...everything u have was outstanding acting especially anger and naughtiness makes me to become an addict...I wish u have a long life and be happy forever and ever ...continued your process until everyone become tired of describing you ...I wish to see you in front of my eyes in the birthday eve ...once visit tamilnadu and announce the good news soon we were eagerly waiting for that day to take selfie with you ,forget to go home some kinds of dreams to be fulfilled when u visit tamilnadu...Your eyes speaks more than your voice ...depth in your acting makes everyone to fall in love with easily... ❤_ nivetha_N @nivetha_nagendiren)

As we are coming close to celebrate the birthday of our Kunal Karan Kapoor let me talk about the Character Cadet Yadhuvansh Sahni he played in the show LEFT RIGHT LEFT. It’s one of my favourite character that he gave reel life. This character has his weakness. It’s not that YUDI did not know his weakness but it was difficult for him to accept them. He wanted to change become like others and compared himself to others and felt inferior. But the day he accepted his weakness his life changed. He could make those his strength. My favourite scene was his talk with Shalini after he tries to commit suicide. One could see the confidence in him. This character taught me that it’s important to accepts one’s weakness and one can convert them into strength. CADET YUDI THAUGHT ME THAT IT’S IMPORTANT THAT YOU FIRST ACCEPT YOURSELVES THE WAY YOU ARE. THANK YOU ROCKSTAR KUNAL KARAN KAPOOR FOR BRINGING YUDI INTO OUR LIVES AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY IN ADVANCE. Belicia

First of all ..i thank to kunal ..bcoz he give more friends 🤗🤗 and they are support my drawings ...my first ever crush is kunal ..it may so many serial actors here but i still luv only kunal ji 😘😘 ...and his acting is mesmerizing still i can't forget nbtnmkk ...one of my Fav character is mohan ..and he is very romantic and lovable person..please stay with us and my more blessings to u for lift in your life above and above ...and last you are my ever ever ever crush in my life ..i can't give your place for anyone 😍😍😍😘😘😘😘😘 - Abarna

#kunal karan kapoor #actor #artist #write

1 note · View note

drakewalkerisreal · 5 years

Text

Chapter 8: Only in the darkness, you can see the stars!!

Amour Sans Fin

Drake x Riley

Sorry, if some of you find it a slow romantic fic. But thats how Drake is like!!

We reached Lythikos after five hours drive crossing the Alps range. It is Olivia’s place, but I have always been thoroughly enchanted by the beauty of Lythikos. As we reached the Nevrakis chateau, the view in front of us was breathtakingly beautiful.

Everybody arrived at almost same time at Olivia’s castle in different cars.

“Welcome to Lythikos” Maxwell always seems excited.

I looked at her taking in the vista of Mountains from Nevrakis Chateau.

“This is beautiful” she took a deep breath.

No. You are beautiful.

She is wearing a simple green Cardigan with blue denim with sneakers. No fancy jackets like other nobles. Her hair is in half updo today and her light curls are falling down her shoulders. They must smell good. I can feel it. Wait!! What am I? A sniffer dog?

“Where is Bertrand, Maxwell? I notice he’s not here lecturing Brooks today.” I advanced to them.

“Bertrand was called away for some business having to do with our estate.”

“Bertrand is gone?? Now, this is real vacation!!” Riley giggled.

“Yes, we can enjoy ourselves” Maxwell grinned too.

“But it’s cold in here” Hana rubbed her arms.

Wait till you go out in snow.

I suggested Hana eyeing Riley “You must have packed anything warmer”

“Not much” she sighed

“C’mon Ladies!! I’ll show you your room” Maxwell lead them upstairs.

I reached to my allotted room. It must be room for underprivileges in Lythikos. Thanks Olivia!! This is what I expect from you!! At least I have roof over my head. After settling in my stuff, I get down to the side of the lake.

In a while, I saw her coming down with Maxwell near the frozen lake. Liam and Olivia were already doing ice skating holding hands at the centre. They were laughing and Olivia is kind of showing her claim over Liam.

Maxwell and Riley stood beside me with Hana.

“You know how to ice skate?? Right??” Maxwell asked her.

“Umm... No. I never tried. But I can do some skiing”

Now, that’s my kind of girl.

“But I can try. What is it about?? Try to stay upright and don’t fall. “

“Good enough” Maxwell encouraged her “Now Go to Liam”

I decided to watch from outside the arena.

Maxwell waved at Olivia and tried to distract her. He was showing his spin to Olivia. But Olivia was not interested at all. She made such disgusting face.

Maxwell winks at Riley and sent her sailing across ice towards Liam.

He mouthed “Go get him” He’s not a prize to win, Maxwell.

Suddenly she lost her balance a bit and Liam held her. No, that wasn’t a trick. I can see.

“Gotcha” he smiled and caught her in his arms. She felt uneasy and pulled away a bit. Although she smiled.

“Hey, Liam”

“Let’s Skate” he took her hand and lead her to centre of the lake.

Now, he’s skating with her holding hands. Yes, I felt jealous. I was never jealous of Liam before. I don’t know why but I am feeling it now. No, it has nothing to do with her. I am only a human. I can have such feelings even with a friend. He always gets the girl. Every girl gets enchanted by him.

Their fingers are entwined now and she is blushing.

This place sucks!!

Olivia interrupted their conversation making face and pointing towards Maxwell. He was smirking from the other end.

Olivia threw some insulting words at Riley. Liam tried to calm Olivia down but Riley replied with a smile. She doesn’t seem to affected by such petty insults. She is stronger than I thought of her.

Olivia insults her more and took Liam to other side of the Lake.

She looked at the crowd feeling embarrassed and alone.

Maxwell seemed to be busy flirting with Penelope. “I don’t think I can balance on these” Penelope complained.

I saw Tariq fussing with his skates. However, Hana was gliding on the lake elegantly. This kind of display of elegance is must for nobles.

Thank God ! She has got Hana. Hana glided around her and now they were talking and giggling and laughing. I love the way she laughs coz she does without faking it. That’s the difference between Riley and other girls here.

Finally, this skating thing ended and everybody headed for skiing. Yeah!! That’s what I wanted.

Liam was still busy with Olivia. I joined Riley and other to crest the top of the mountain. Maxwell was helping Hana with her skis.

“So, Brooks you finally made it to slopes”

“Were you starting to miss me?” she asked playfully.

“Me? Hardly!! I was just getting bored”

“I did not find you in skating”

“Skating is not my thing. That’s dull and pathetic. But I was there looking at you.” Shit “I mean looking at you all doing funny dance on skates” Escaped it.

“Aww..Drake I would love to see you in a tutu sometime” she chuckled.

“You wish!! Kiddo!!”

“Hey!! I got it; you have problem with skating. What about skiing? Is it manly enough for you??” she raised her brow.

“Heh!! You know what? I am champion at it” I boasted “How about a race?”

“I am in”

“We’ll have to ski down that slope. One who gets at bottom first, will win” I pointed towards the end.

She nodded.

“Ready??”

“More than ready”

“One...two...th” And there she goes even before I ended three.

“This is cheating” I shouted behind her.

“Hey Mr Champion, afraid of my little head start”

I chased after her. The wind whips against the face as I picked up the speed. She was maintaining pace ahead of me. She is good at that. I looked at right seeing Olivia and Liam skating playfully. She did not bother to notice them. However, Liam shouted from behind “Go Riley”

I picked up the speed more and overtook her.

“Hey” she shouted.

There was a large rock between the slope and we needed to take a long curve to pass around it. But the angular curve passes near the edge of the mountain. I swerved to go around it and suddenly slowed down to look back.

“Watch yourself Brooks” Shit.

She lost her balance while swerving and slipped down towards the edge. I immediately stopped but I saw her slipping more towards the edge. Oh no. I freed myself immediately from the ski and ran towards her. She was almost near the edge and gripped a branch of tree to stop herself from falling down.

“Hang on, Brooks” I reached to her and grabbed to pull her upwards as half of her body is hanging down. She was so light so I pulled her without much effort.

“You okay?” I asked checking her.

“Yeah” she was panting.

Then she laughed. Why is she laughing? She may have fallen from the edge.

“You lost your mind ??”

“Never had such race in my life. Thanks for saving me Drake. Again”

“You’re weird and unnecessarily funny... you know that??” I still can’t believe she find it funny.

“Drake! You look more scared than me, by the way” she giggled.

“Don’t try to hide it by laugh. This pain will go away but humiliation of losing will take some time”

She elbowed me playfully.

I took a deep breath inhaling the cool, crisp mountain air.

“This trip hasn’t been bad so far. Shame that tomorrow is waltzing and bowing and all that.”

“Oh shit!! I don’t know this waltz much!”

“Are you joking?? You’re good with Liam at Masquerade!!” I asked in surprise.

“That was all Liam. I didn’t do much” she sighed “I am going to look stupid in front of everyone, aren’t I?

“Hey it will be probably hilarious to watch” I chuckled

“Drake!! If you can’t help, just keep it shut” she got up flapping snow off her jackets.

“If I could, I would help. I don’t know the steps” but she stomped off in snow.

“You can ask Hana” I ran behind her.

She stopped looking at me with baby eyes full of anger “Thanks for suggestion”

We glided over to the top meeting rest of the group.

“It is time to head over to my spectacular lounge to warm up” Olivia announced.

“Thanks for the race. I actually had fun” I whispered for calming her down.

She didn’t say anything but narrowed her eyes. She is really angry. Fuck!! I shouldn’t have made fun out of it.

Everybody headed towards Nevrakis Chateau.

In the evening, we were all sitting together in the lounge by the fire drinking hot chocolate. Me, Liam, Riley, Hana, Maxwell, Penelope, Kiara.

Riley, Maxwell and Hana were giggling about something. Liam and I were looking at them with amusement. How are they always full of energy?

“Hey!! See little marshmallows shaped like hearts” Hana chimed like two years old.

“Yeah!! Just adorable” I rolled my eyes.

Riley glared at me shooting daggers. I retreated like a puppy.

“Incoming” Maxwell pointed towards Olivia.

“Hello!! My dear guests. I hope you all are enjoying” Olivia gave a pointed smile.

“I always enjoy at Lythikos” Liam smiled.

I rolled my eyes till back of the head.

Olivia seemed to notice and smiled devilishly at me.

“Hey there Drake!! Enjoying ourselves!! Are we? If little Savannah was here, she would have enjoyed too”

I clenched my teeth. This is my reaction when someone talks about Savannah. Olivia knows where to hit. I shook my head gesturing Olivia to shut it but she ignored it. Everybody turned towards us now.

“Oh!! What happened?? Are you in contact with her?? Where is she?? Give me her contact number someday and I’ll invite her myself here”

“Olivia…” Liam said in a warning tone.

I got up immediately to leave.

“She was so sensitive”

“Olivia..no..” Liam warned again.

“You know what?? I just remembered; I’ve got somewhere I need to be.” I advanced towards door as I didn’t want to mess up with Olivia making a show of my emotions.

“Wait Drake!! Comeback! I wasn’t finished with you” I heard Olivia throwing comments behind me.

“Olivia!! That’s enough!! Leave him alone before I slap that smile off your face” I stopped for a moment hearing Riley’s voice and left the room.

I got out in the dark night walking in the snow. I stopped in a clearing of woods and looked up in the sky. It must be the time. I checked watch.

After a while, I heard footsteps behind. I turned around and find her.

“Ooooo” she tried to scare me playfully.

“Brooks! What are you doing here??”

“You don’t scare easily, huh?”

“You must try something else. Now, what are you doing here?”

“I should ask this question. It’s dark and freezing outside. You must get back.”

“What are you?? My mom?”

“Shut up and get back. C’mon she took my arm”

I looked into her eyes. She hesitated and left my arm immediately.

“C’mon??”

“I am here on purpose..”

“What is it here? She asked looking around.

“Trust me??”

“Trust you?”

I reached out and shoved her into the soft snow.

“What the hell Drake!!” she shouted

“Stop shouting kiddo and look up” I sat beside her and pointed towards the sky.

“Wow” she looked up to see the dazzling sky with shooting stars lighting up the night. I can see those stars in her eyes. Hazel brown eyes. Deep Hazel Brown eyes.

“Drake”

“Yes, my lady”

“This is absolutely gorgeous. I have never seen something like this before”

“Nothing beats a clear view of sky during a meteor shower”

She smiled at me genuinely.

We looked at the sky full of shooting stars silently till it gets cleared.

“I used to do this with Savannah since childhood. My dad used to do security for Constantine and Regina. Savannah, my little sister and I were allowed to hang out with Liam and Leo. Leo is Liam’s elder brother. If you know him?”

She nodded silently.

“Liam and I ended up becoming best of friends. However, Savannah was friendly with everyone. She loved living at the palace when we were kids. She was fascinated by dresses and jewellery.” I keep on blabbering. “But it got harder when she was older.”

“What happened?” she looked into me.

“She couldn’t take it I guess. I failed her; I was unable to protect her. One day she left without a word to me..to anyone..” I put hand over my face. “This is more than I talked about it with anyone till now.”

“Really?” she asked genuinely

“If I started to trust, I may start with you”

“This is the nicest thing you have said to me”

I looked at her pink lips. I want those lips..so bad. I don’t know why? They look soft like petals of some flower. Her cheeks are pink too.

“We probably should head back” she stared at ground blushing.

“We better be” Self-restraint is must.

We walked slowly back, trudging through the snow and wind. Suddenly she took my arm. Electricity was now running through me.

“Umm..for safety” She looked away smiling.

“It’s really slippery here. We should be careful”

We got inside and spotted Hana waiting for us. “You two, okay?”

“Hana! You’re up!!” Riley felt guilty.

“I couldn’t sleep with you two out in dark.”

“I am sorry, we kept you up”

“At least both of you are back.”

“Goodnight ladies” I waved hand and headed towards my room immediately.

But I was sure, it wont be easy to get sleep tonight.

@drakewalker04 @fromthedeskofpaisleybleakmore @emceesynonymroll @star-spangled-eyes @dcbbw @jovialyouthmusic @drakesensworld @drakeandcamilleofvaltoria @ao719 @duchessemersynwalker

@pug-bitch @rainbowsinthestorm @burnsoslow @i-bloody-love-drake-walker @iplaydrake @katedrakeohd @nikkis1983 @qween-corgis @thorfosterlove @butindeed

@gardeningourmet @speedyoperarascalparty

@pedudley @ibldw-main @irishwhiskys-blog @inlovewithwalker @addictedtodrakefanfic

@notoriouscs @grumpymarshmallowswife

@maria-soederberg

29 notes · View notes

lizzybeth1986 · 5 years

Text

Quick Thoughts on TRH Book 1 Chapter 6

• It's YEEHAW time everyone!

• And also raise a middle finger to logic as we see the MC wear something that she should have probably lent to the Platinum MC for a country performance, rather than for farm work.

• There's also the bit where she randomly takes a pregnancy test coz she feels nauseous (yes I know. It's plot related and is probably done to show a false negative. But you need to time these things, MC! The best time to look for a double line is closer to the time you're supposed to be having your period, if your period is regular).

• Screenshot Credits:

Hana: @pixieferry

Drake: @thefirstcourtesan

Maxwell: The Abhirio YouTube channel.

• These are the tags you can block if you don't want to see these posts: #long post, #trh quick thoughts, #trh qts, #trh qt reblogs.

• Drake has an AUNT? Please don't give me any more family members, I'm done dealing with the ones he already has.

• I'm wondering if Leona exists so that PB can do some serious retconning on Bianca's behalf. After all, when she appeared in the Drake playthroughs of Book 3, there wasn't much of a positive reception for her - with some players even saying that the MC should have a few choice words to say to her - and for good reason.

• Title: Home, Home on the Range

So whatever little knowledge I do have about a place like Texas is from films and pop culture, so this might not be new information to you but it is to me! 😁 So I'm probably going to be a gazillion times more excited about sharing it than you guys might be to read it! Bear with me for a sec.

From what I'm reading, "Home, Home on the Range" seems to a western folk song that's so popular it's considered an unofficial anthem in that region. Its origin was from a poem called "My Western Home" from a Kansas native called Dr Brewster M Highly, in 1872 (it was even made Kansas' state song in 1945?). The lyrics are very...Drake:

Where the air is so pure, and the zephyrs so free,

The breezes so balmy and light,

That I would not exchange my home on the range,

For all of the cities so bright.

Mostly a very idyllic, glorified portrait of country life. You find similar sentiments in Drake's diamond scene this chapter.

• Alternative Title: We Just Needed An Excuse to Use the BSC Soundtrack Twice.

• So we meet Bianca, Drake's mother, this chapter. If you married him this is the second time you're seeing her, and if you married anyone else this is the first time and you have no clue who she is until Drake introduces her to you. She also mentions in the Drake playthrough that this is not the kind of welcome she was hoping to give her son and daughter-in-law.

• We also meet Leona, Bianca's older sister and Drake's aunt. She's extremely unimpressed with this group of nobles and largely seems to blame the nobility in general for whisking away her younger sister, leaving her alone to manage the ranch?

• She pretends not to listen much to Cordonian news while talking to Liam, but seems to have the time to keep up with Cordonian gossip while talking to us - and luckily you can call her out on it too.

• She seems the type that likes a rebellious Duchess/Queen, going by her responses to the more sarcastic options from the MC.

Hmm. This scene does two things: one, it establishes that the ranch is facing financial problems, in terms of money and staffing, and two, it possibly may build up to why Bianca had to return to the States. Both I think might become important points in the coming chapters.

• Bianca seems intent on not letting her children know anything about the fraught situation at her ranch, but Leona is having none of it. You either do your work and do it well, or she will put you through your paces. Which is exactly what is happening with Bertrand now.

• The whole theme of "we need to get pregnant, and fast" returns with the presence of Savannah, who greets us with a very excited, sociable Bartie in tow. You can choose to either pick him up and pay attention to him, ask Savannah to figure out what he wants, or ignore him completely. Whatever you choose, the topic of you becoming a mother will come up (either she comments on how you're a natural, or she will tell you that you'll eventually be able to read your own baby's signals). Savannah now joins a long, long line of people who will talk to us as if we're already pregnant (her fiancé will join this list in a couple minutes too, don't worry).

• Speaking of parents, the sole dad of the (extended) group - Bertrand - is nowhere to be found. Bianca is all praise, Leona is Unimpressed™, and Maxwell is shocked that the guy who swore never to touch fowl again after witnessing a flooded peacock enclosure is now chasing chickens. The group overall can't believe it.

• Bertrand is, in fact, chasing chickens.

• So here's the other issue that will come up. Having eventually convinced Savannah that he is serious about her and Bartie, he now wants to win the approval of the family. Bianca is more than ready to accept him, Leona is...Unimpressed™.

• This sets stage for Problem 3 of the Goings On at The Walker Ranch: Bertrand is desperate for approval and Leona seems pretty set on not giving him that. So I'm pretty sure getting her to realize that Savannah's fiancé means business and there is actually something for her to respect about him - if not love - is pretty much one of the loose ends we will have to tie up in the course of the Texas chapters.

• Savannah's laid out some clothes for everyone, so everyone gets a 'country' look and a cowboy hat.

• Like always, the outfit options come with different reactions based on the LI you're romancing:

Liam's looks nice I think, Hana is pretty (I haven't the foggiest idea of what would on a ranch so I wouldn't know how feasible - or not - these two outfits would be), Maxwell looks like he's dressed for the ranch AND for winter and Drake looks okay (like...there's a theme or something with his outfits, like he needs to have a LOT of a particular colour. Denim on denim, brown shirt brown hat).

• While Liam and Esther collectively swoon over each other, Savannah is all shocked and like "you both know we're still here, right?". Uh huh, you had no problem fangirling over Bertrand's "stern but sexy eyebrows" in public but suddenly me flirting a little with my husband is too much for you 😑

A little too much??? Listen, Esther has worn a hat that looked like it swallowed a hundred smaller hats on the way and cried in JOY at the sight. She has COMFORTED a widowed grieving Queen Mother and STARED DOWN Hana's awful parents, all with that honking big hat obscuring her face. How does a tiny puny cowboy hat with a bracelet thingy around it even compare??

• In the kitchen, Bertrand continues his woeful attempts to make conversation with Leona by revealing just how little he knows about running a ranch. Leona is Unimpressed™ (Betrand: How are the crops? Leona: We have cattle 😑. Bertrand: Who...ate the crops? Leona: 😑😑😑)

• Leona's like the adult version of the Unimpressed Sikh Child in Bollywood Hogwarts:

• We get darkly roasted coffee to help us gear up for the day's work at the ranch, and it's quite...the mouthfull. If you succeed in drinking it, you get high on coffee, and if you react to the strong taste, Leona makes a smart-alec comment about how "her highness must have wanted a chilled latte" (I forget which drink she mentioned but something similar) or something. Wish there was an option to tell her "Bertrand didn't tell me about the stick up your ass" (callback! From which book? Guess!)

• You feel slightly nauseous on the way, which is a bit of a set up to the end of the chapter.

• We split up into teams. Liam and Maxwell help with getting the hay for the horses, Hana and Drake help with sorting the tack.

Liam is a quick learner (and learns stuff just by observing), Maxwell is confused between the interests of horses and dogs, Drake is even more confused at Hana's speed, and PB has forgotten that Hana has actually ridden actual horses and would actually have at least a working idea of what actual tack with an actual horse would look like. Sure she may not have MADE tack for those horses, but you can miss me with that "imaginary horse friends" bullshit.

• See Team TRR, this is what happens when you focus on nothing else but Hana's skills. Even you fail to keep track.

• We feed the chickens (and I can see what I think are shades of Hana's upbringing in the way she says "wait your turn! one at a time!"...with chickens).

• ...there was a "no royal pets" policy in the palace that Liam waived?? No wonder we could get a corgi and Penelope could bring her poodles to court as soon as Liam became King!

• Re: Liam talking about having stuffed animals rather than pets and stating that he and Hana were on the same boat. Et tu, Liam? HOW MANY TIMES DOES HANA HAVE TO TELL YOU GUYS SHE NEVER HAD TOYS.

• I'm imagining poor young Maxwell realizing that peacocks don't like hugs and now I'm sad ☹️

• So the set up to the group scene is that none of these characters have truly experienced the joy of cuddling cute pets. It's not much even by way of a group scene, just a cute scene where the MC can direct Tiny the little calf to cuddle all these sad sad people (pushed into embroidery lessons and diplomacy sessions as children!) and cure Bertrand of his cow-suspicion (cowspicion?). The more pets you have with you the cuter it is, coz the two corgis go about acquainting themselves with everyone - the cat, the cows, everybody.

• ROE REFERENCE! We see Jess and Blake spearheading a successful business as caterers and wedding planners (did Jess take coaching from Chaz's sister-in-law Carmen? 😁) and they leave it vague (as expected, since Jess' romantic relationship with Blake is determinant - as is the possibility that Liam and Jess could be related by marriage if the RoE MC chose Leo lol) whether they're romantically involved or not, but at least this way I know they're happy with their jobs!

• Apparently they'd catered at enough disaster weddings that they decided they could do a better job

• I have two questions:

1. Did Leo ever recommend Carmen? I'm guessing not since based on whether the RoE MC married him or not, he'd probably feel more comfortable recommending family/friends than someone who - in a different playthrough - probably never really met him.

2. Why is Liam helping Bertrand and Savannah with contacts for their wedding when we ended up doing most of the searching and finding ourselves?? 🧐

• BertVannah seem to want a mix of local and Cordonian traditions: Savannah wants to recapture her parents' wedding by riding a horse down the aisle, and Bertrand asks Liam to officiate, as a royal. Maxwell and Hana will be in charge of entertainment and decorations...and the MC should not move a muscle because Bertrand has already decreed us pregnant.

• Savannah's ex Chuck is a buff ginger, and an already insecure Bertrand is made even more insecure at the sight of him. Another on the list of things PB expects us to fix in the Walker Ranch. Drake owes me both in cash, fancy hats and a lifetime supply of free smoked BBQ ribs after all this. The kind of shit a pregnant royal is expected to do...

• Time for Drake diamond scene - which is a mostly fluffy scene that takes place close to a river nearby which has a great view of the sunrise and sunset, and a ride atop a kayak.

• Here's the important stuff you can get from this scene:

- Drake knows how to build stuff (we knew this already, but here Drake talks specifically about how he and Savannah would build rafts)

- Drake sucks at taking compliments, but Drake stans who saw their MC's intro to TRH already knew that 🤭

- You get to flex your paddling muscles. Drake is...Impressed™

- Lovely sunshine

- A cute story about how Drake and Savannah had a canonball contest at this river, and happy memories of his Dad being just their dad for once, not dad + King Guard

- Drake gets to talk about the mark his father left on him, and how carefree he used to be before Jackson's death

- You can revive the cannonball contest with Drake before you head back to the estate, and if you're married you share a passionate kiss. The writers went to great lengths to describe how passionate the kiss wasqqq

If you're married to Drake, this spot is described as 'romantic' and 'private', the MC makes a joke about being the "First Mate" of Drake's heart, the usual variations. Drake also mentions that he hopes to emulate his father's way of parenting once he himself becomes a father. I'm also guessing the story of how his father and mother used to visit this lake before they had children would have an implied added importance to a married Drake trying for a child.

Funny how the assassination attempt on Liam always ends up revolving more around what it did to Drake than what it did to Liam. Both in the original Book 2 Italian Restaurant Scene where it was first referenced, and here (Drake's restaurant scene is also the only scene that highlights how that particular attack affected Liam - if you don't buy this scene, the attacks are mentioned in a more offhand way by Constantine when we confront him, and Liam still doesn't have a word to say). Stop. What happened to Liam happened to him. Stop making it all about Drake.

• Also why does Drake keep insisting the MC helped him find Savannah? She didn't. He spotted the envelope. He saw the address. He deduced where in Paris it was and tried to check it out. The only help we could provide was convincing him to stay and listen to her, and even that was optional.

• The MC wakes up wondering if she's going to feel nauseous, which then leads to the realization that it could be morning sickness. That's the most random race to use a pregnancy test I've seen.

• The result is negative, and the LI wakes up to the MC telling them about the result of the pregnancy test. The reactions to the news are identical. They follow roughly this template:

I can headcanon that Hana is actually feeling and understanding the MC's pain when she says "that's not silly at all", but I won't. I refuse to do the heavy work for the writers.

• In any case, there are some guests, and only Hana seems to know who they are.

• My face as it goes from seeing Kiara, Olivia, Penelope and Madeleine (yes, in that order):

• Sooo it looks like this week we're going to have a clash of the country and the courtly. Uh oh. I don't see this ending very well...unless there's a deus ex machina coming our way.

• General Thoughts:

- This chapter is filler, as expected, but it's the kind of filler meant to set up the major problems in that place. And there's plenty hinted at in this chapter alone: solving the financial troubles of the ranch, the clash of cultures that will come with the court ladies being guests, winning over Leona, learning about Drake's and also Bianca's past, Bertrand's insecurities. It's going to take a couple chapters to untangle all that!

- My guess is that the MC is possibly pregnant, but got a false negative (esp if she's nowhere near her expected time for her period), and will probably find out during Bertrand and Savannah's wedding? IDK. Most people I know will wait to see if they get their periods first (I did that too, waited a couple days after the expected day just to be sure), because that's when your hCG levels are high enough to show in your urine sample. That was a waste of a perfectly good pregnancy test, MC!

- The variations are very few, besides the scene where they all get new outfits and references to the MC and her spouse by different people including Blake and Jess. Perhaps there may be an LI scene coming soon.

- I mentioned earlier that Leona may be there as a way for the writing team to retcon Bianca's departure, since in the original series all we are told us was that she "was...struggling" after Jackson's death and left for the States at some point, leaving her children behind. Not a lot of people were very happy about this and though she was portrayed as a positive character in Book 3 (Drake's playthrough), it wasn't convincing enough. Leona is possibly there as a way to soften the audience to Bianca, and perhaps to get us a plausible reason for her leaving without her children. I'm not sure what could justify not taking them along, but okay.

- So Drake in his scene tells us that they came to the ranch as kids, but there is that matter of Savannah having been there long enough at some point to have had a boyfriend. I'm wondering if she spent some time on the ranch while Drake had gone to college.

- Also...if that's what happened, why was France even an option for her to bring up Bartie if she'd been in touch with her mother. Why did France, a place where she had very few contacts or living experience, win out over a place she was familiar with and where she had family?

- Leona's very Drake-like...but with an actual job that she's probably good at.

- Leona's also going to be Unimpressed™ for the most of her time in this book, with her probably becoming a little more impressed towards the end. Told you she'd be The Unimpressed Sikh Child (if you still have trouble with this meme, it's a character from a Bollywood film about a magical school called Aabra Ka Dabra. Here's some additional context from desi comedians and former Pretentious Movie Reviewers Kanan Gill and Biswa Kalyan Rath to illustrate why Unimpressed Sikh Child is so awesome:)

"Stop trying to impress people. Impress people with how unimpressed you are." If that isn't what Leona is doing. One wry expression and that's all it takes for all of Cordonia's royalty and nobility to fall over each other to prove themselves to her.

- Leona is an ass but you've got to respect the way she plays that game.

- I hope the writers don't forget that Kiara and Savannah were...yknow...good friends. Given how badly she was treated in Book 3 (and the narrative treated her really, really badly. Like I'm pretty sure some of you might have no idea just how badly she's been treated), I have serious doubts.

- Will we get a Hana or Maxwell diamond scene next? A good one or mostly just fluff? Let's see.

- Will we get another flashback scene? Maybe. It's possible. Bianca would remember something.

- One thing I do know for sure is that there is going to be more of Perfect Angel Savannah and Bumbling Bertrand. I'm not looking forward to it.

• Next: I'll be doing TRR Book 1's QT for Chapter 6 as well! Hopefully it will be ready by Friday. As for this series...until next week, folks!

#long post #the royal heir #trh quick thoughts #trh qts #king liam #hana lee #maxwell beaumont #drake walker #texas walker ranch

47 notes · View notes

embracesufferdestroy-blog · 5 years

Text

When You Don’t Go the Same Way As Everyone Else Around You

It becomes tricky. Not so much at first...but eventually a lot of people find themselves in a very lonely and uncomfortable place.

What the fuck am I talking about? Choosing a different path from all your peers; and in doing so watching your entire social life disappear.

So find new friends? Find better people! So much easier said than done these days. At least when it comes to real life friends who you can actually meet up with for dinner or coffee or just to hang out in your living room. I can cast my line into ocean of available and awesome online friends...and pull up 10 potential keepers...but the reality of the situation is - that’s not what I need. It’s also not what I want. Quality over quantity is a big thing for me.

This is the PoV from someone who is stuck on the opposite end of the spectrum that ALL their friends ended up on the same side of...and it’s honest, which may come off as selfish in a way, but I don’t really care.

It started off easy enough. You’re in your early 20s, everyone’s finally done with school...you’re hanging out, doing things, going places. Sponteneity is the name of the game. Bored at 11:30-12 on a Tuesday night? Call up so-and-so and let’s go for a ride! Yes! Life is still fun.

But then the slippery slop starts. Your first friend gets engaged or randomly married without even mentioning it to anyone. Then suddenly it’s a downfall of repetition. Dates turn into boyfriends and girlfriends...which turn into moving in together...and then marriage.

Suddenly you’re 26 and you’re the only single person left in your social circle. Never even been on a date before. Can’t even BUY a date. So for a time or two - you take them up on their offers of joining them out, or for dinner, but it dawns on you super fast that “being the third wheel” is actually a thing. Dinner dates turn awkward because the couple you’re with starts arguing or nitpicking. You feel like you’re there more as a relationship/marriage counselor as opposed to being their friend. So you stop accepting their offers for going out.

Then the slope just gets more and more slippery. The first baby happens...followed by a fucking AVALANCHE OF BABIES.

You’re 27 and suddenly everyone’s fertility must’ve magically activated one night. You still haven’t even been on your first date. Can’t even make it past the “hello” phase of dating websites. Great.

For a while you try to be there for your struggling new mom/dad friends. The babies are cute for about a month...and then it soon becomes apparent that you no longer have the friend you once had. It starts to seep into your bones - the fact that for the next like 15-20 (or more!) years that you’ll never really have an opportunity to spend time with the friend you ONCE had. They’re not the same. All the fun has been sucked right out of them. They’ve turned into a nonstop volcano of complaints about dirty diapers, lack of sleep, too much crying, overbearing mother-in-laws (mothers-in-law?)...the list goes on.

Spontaneity has gone out the window. Bored on a Tuesday night now? Too bad for you. Time to load up Netflix or just keep on gaming because you know for certain that if you even tried to make plans with any of your friends you’d just be met with “nap/bed time...” and “my husband can’t be trusted to watch her alone for more than 15min” and “I’m just too tired and I have to be up at 7am to take <stupidly named child> to <place>.”

Then suddenly 30 hits...and you feel like FINALLY MAYBE you’ve reached some sort of plateau. Some of the kids are old enough now to be a little more self-reliant so mom can come over. Except...mom never wants to come over. Because in 2019 it has become WAY too much of a goddamn chore to bring your children along with you ANYWHERE that isn’t a trip to the grocery store or Target that you can post about on FB because little Tutu Fairy Princess had a meltdown over being told she’s not allowed to buy a lacy black thong that she pulled out of a bin of sale undies.

So there you are, you’re freshly 30, still have never even been on a date. Still can’t even get a response to a “hello” on any dating website you’ve been on for the last 6 years.

Then you’re 33 and it’s still no better. The years keep going by, and you keep hoping that maybe your friends will slowly start returning to the land of the friendships...but it’s a dead hope. You no longer really have friends. Sure, in each others’ hearts you still hold a special place - but when is the last time you actually saw each other and spent REAL MEANINGFUL time together? And I mean more than just a 90min lunch date that was speckled with phone calls from an absent-minded husband, and nonstop rants about child stuff...and absolutely NO conversation about anything else but THEIR life and THEIR family and THEIR child(ren). By the time you get back in your car - YOU’RE tired just from hearing about children and all their bullshit.

All your friends are essentially lost to the wind. Even the ones who claimed they NEVER wanted to get married and/or NEVER wanted children. They all went to the dark side. They all caved in and gave in to “norms” and pressures. “It was easier to just have a kid rather than listen to my parents AND his parents bitch at us all the time coz we hadn’t provided them with a grand child yet.” Um, ok...wow.

So you start reaching out to online communities, in one last-ditch effort to try and find a real friend.

You’ve tried. So many times. To meet up with other voluntarily child-free adults...but it turns out to be utterly fruitless. They’re so few and far between, and most of them are just downright violent/horrible about their vocal hatred of children. I mean, I hate kids and never want any, but I’d never sit there and talk about wanting to physically hurt them like some of these weirdos have a tendency to do. If it’s not being TOTALLY put off by their strangely violent dreams of hurting kids - they just turn out to be wholly incompatible with you for whatever reason. Too much of a gap in age, zero common interests, they’re boring as fuck an only sit there and watch TV during all their free time.

Going through dating profiles is excruciating in your 30s when you don’t want a child in the picture. It’s almost impossible to find a woman in her 30s-40s without a child. Even lesbians now all have multiple children. The single men in their 30s-40s are all single dads with an accidental child from an old girlfriend who they KNEW it was never going to work with. And then you remember that you’re 33 and still haven’t been on one date, and have never even received a response to a “hello” on any dating websites/apps...so you just deactivate all your profiles and prepare for a loveless life.

Even talking to a lot of people gets hard when you tell them that you don’t want kids. “why not?! that’s sooo sad, omg” “oh, you can still change your mind!” “you WILL change your mind when the right woman/man comes along!” Eh, no. Fuck you, cunt. I’m 33 years old now, and for more than half my life I’ve known that being a parent is something I NEVER want to be. Stop telling women that. Seriously. It’s annoying. And devaluing of us as people. I’m more than just a potential incubator. My goddamn incubator doesn’t even work! So what? Am I less of a woman now? No.

So there it is. Climbing through your 30s. No friends. No dates. No social life outside of an occasional gaming night with an online friend who lives across the country.

I severely wish more people in my life had chosen the child-free path.

#lonely #childfree #singleandhatingit #adultingsucks

12 notes · View notes

survivor-tierradelfuego · 4 years

Text

Ep. 13: “I just want to bury my head in a mountain of blankets and sleep.” - Sarah

Najwah

Well, that was shit. I feel as though I really tried to get Amy to vote with us but Pedro wanted to get her out so everyone just decided to write her name down too. Also, she basically used my name as a decoy too. And I used Maddison as a decoy too so she could flush Olivia's idol. It worked. I had my superidol at the ready too. I feel like this game is just going to get more insane from here on out. We are so little people in the game. So close and yet I'm content with just being here. In the final seven. This feels good. I'm glad Pedro is with us and I wish we had gotten him on board a while back. We haven't told anyone else about our idol and superidol yet. I wonder if Amy really gave Pedro the fake idol lmao that would be hilarious. Anyway. I'm just going to carry on playing I guess. Amy had crazy big plans and I loved them but I felt like her allegiance to Maddison ruined our common goal. I wish she'd just been on board with us voting Maddison like she wanted to when we voted Grae out. That's when it all started. That's when we were causing waves in the game without anyone even knowing. Sigh. I wish things could have been different.

Olivia A

So it looks like Maddison and I got Pedro to agree to work with us!! This is very very exciting. We can get Aimee to flip easily (even though she does keep going back on that promise) and have a majority. Assuming it goes as planned, Maddison and I will then have our pick of who to go to the final 3 with (Aimee or Pedro). I have felt 100% solid with Maddison from day 1 and we have made every single decision together. I don’t wanna be at the final 3 with anyone but her.

Aimee

All Maddison had to do was play her idol on Amy and Cody would of went home. Maddison was scared that Old Hanuha was lying to me again and that those 3 were voting Maddison and Pedro and I would be left out and vote Amy. I wanted to put Cody’s down but I knew it would of been rocks, four versus four vote.

Dang I wish I would of known about the idol sooner so I could of had Old Hanuha put the votes on Maddison and get Cody out that way. It would’ve been such a huge game move for me and Maddison that would have looked super great for the jury, and if Cody left this game would be wide open again. Also it would’ve been believable that Pedro ratted the vote out to Maddison instead of me so I could’ve hid behind that too and old Hanuha never would’ve known I told Maddison the vote. But I get it and Maddison was nervous it was her. We still have an opportunity to flip this on the next vote too. It just requires Pedro and the personal connection I have with him to flip with me. He will have to put personal things aside with Maddison and Olivia if he wants to be more than fourth or fifth in this game. He knows the best he can get here is fifth with them....he even told me this straight up. I wish I didn’t have to flip because I love these people but I know that Cody Najwah and Sarah are a final 3. And I’ve been wronged so many times before that it would be a nice little treat for Ben and everyone else hahahaha. Actually Sarah flipping would be great for her own game too but I’m not sure if she is really going to do that or just is waiting for the right moment to maybe flip with me and Pedro as well. It’s interesting with Sarah because it’s almost like we are both staring at each other waiting for the other to say we wanna flip. Wonder if we are thinking the same thing and maybe planning the same moves. Wouldn’t surprise me, Casanova 👑 has a really similar game to mine, even if it’s portrayed differently.

Aimee

Also, after listening to that podcast. WHOS THE TOP PISCES NOW, ZACK! https://64.media.tumblr.com/ce6ed38bc4ad9c69ee92e5e764c19e5e/tumblr_njj8unqiGl1sqbiv1o5_400.gifv

Sarah

From three days ago but I just got it to upload.... https://youtu.be/w5g35793Bkc

Sarah

From last night... https://youtu.be/IBPzYsGfIRU Najwah I had a brain fart at the end of that game and I said something so ridiculous. I just want to bury my head in a mountain of blankets and sleep. 💀💀 What a fun game though I enjoyed it! But... Embarrassed for life.

Aimee

https://rainbowkarolina.tumblr.com/post/616209748381122560/ I wore my jacket looking fancy for this immunity challenge. Too bad my mood was shit. Oh well. Congrats Cody!! 🥳🥳🥳 https://64.media.tumblr.com/b1324cd7cf8c621547f61c8cb20d5fda/eaeee04a03e6c254-72/s540x810/eaf80576f97d63015f9a99cffb28fe7b46e888cb.gifv

Najwah

No ones ever going to see that video again so let's write a better confession. Here's the thing, I am playing for fun at this point. After hearing and having time to listen to Zack's podcast, I realised how intense I was initially too. How I'd do anything to win. Whether it was stay up until 6am, avoid my job, accidentally stay without food, stay in bed, not call my parents for weeks, blindsiding James just to get to merge. I no longer feel stressed and angry. One thing I liked about Zack's podcast segment was that I have a whole new perspective on a lot of things right now. I'm here, in the fucking top 7. Never thought that would ever happen. I have made friends and gained so much from this. At some point in this game you get to a crossroads and you have to decide who you are. Are you a vicious blindsiding, backstabbing bitch or do you want to see your people WIN more than anything. Tonight Cody won immunity. He fucking deserved it. I'm so happy he can go spend time with his nieces and nephews and not worry about being a target. Me? Oh I'm burning to use my damn superidol so that I can at least try to win ONE immunity.

Everyone in the game right now has won individual immunity except Pedro and I. Which is funny bc I always thought of Pedro as a challenge beast. I miss Amy. I don't like not seeing her in this game. I've been thinking about how we left things all day. Why did she want me to vote her? Why did she trick me about the vote or was that just her protecting me? Either way, we played the same game at each other as our last play. The double decoy. I don't know if I mentioned this yesterday, but Amy wanted to vote Olivia out so that we could form a 4 person alliance with Pedro and Maddison. I've never spoken to Maddison ever. And Pedro is a loose cannon. I don't see how that would have ever worked. And she said our first play would be to get the strong players out: Cody, Sarah.. Like? In my opinion Maddison is the strongest player in the game. If Maddison were at the end, I wouldn't hesitate voting her in a heart beat. I didn't get how she wanted. To hide behind Maddison forever and not take control of her own game. I didn't get that she wanted Maddison out but whenever it came down to it, she would hesitate to get her out? She's told me every one of Maddison and Olivias advantages and idols etc. She's spilled so much tea while I've never told her anything negative about the people I'm working with because I didn't want them out? Ugh. I guess some day I'll ask her. If this were a real game of survivor perhaps I'd take Sarah or Aimee out, like I'd flip on them for a million bucks maybe coz they're strong players but as long as this is an online game ima be cheering everyone on bc this game is long and tough and we have been through things together, ya know?

Olivia A

Just talked to Aimee about flipping to work with Maddison, Pedro, and me. She said she’s in for now but still wants to talk to og hanuha people and see their plan for this tribal. She still said that she realizes if she doesn’t flip all of our games (including hers) are done. So even thought she hasn’t given full agreement, I think we’re all solid on this. We are planning to vote Sarah out. I think this will completely turn the game around. I don’t wanna think too far ahead but I’m starting to see my trajectory to FTC pretty clearly. Don’t wanna speak too soon though so if I get voted out don’t hold this against me lol.

Pedro A

trying to break the trio...have a bad feeling about this tribal ....working with maddison and olivia isnt the best....i hope they dont lie AGAIN....at this point..if i get out....they are next...so its kinda dumb to vote....BUT IF I LOSE....i will scream ALELUIAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...cause damn im exhausted

Aimee

This song is dedicated to Cody and his immunity win!!!!!🙌💚🖤 https://youtu.be/weRHyjj34ZE Sharika - Whenever, Wherever Our humor knows no distance 😻🌵🌈💞 😅I’m trying my damnedest to get Maddison and I as far to the end of this game as possible. So sorry about the confessional about me wanting the idol to work to get you out. https://64.media.tumblr.com/562258ad5eb14f6498ceff24aa8392e7/984582d2a107588c-d2/s540x810/1b6cf1576e95c3672122cfb7887ffd5a644d87da.gifv So I hope no hard feelings! I love that we can laugh over pop divas, gay culture and just life in general. 😂 We are gonna tear up the city as soon as we can hang out in person. I hope Texas and Ohio is ready for this! Olivia A

Pedro being so paranoid about Aimee’s commitment is getting frustrating. Since we brought this plan to him we’ve told him she’s 100% in she’s been talking about flipping forever and he still gets so nervous. I understand the paranoia bc it’s a big move but I wish he would listen to what we’re telling him and trust our intuition. That doesn’t really matter though bc tonight we are voting Sarah and it’s going to work! :) Oh also Maddison and I keep saving up coins to buy things that end up being nothing it’s getting really frustrating but oh well!

Pedro A

Sarrah says she wants to vote maddison...and now aimee..is trying to get me to vote...with maddison and olivia who want to take out sarah.....(i already know about the plan, i made the plan lmao)......somehow i feel like im the one GOING HOME TONIGHT

Maddison

I’m putting trust in someone that I never wanted to have to trust. Pedro, here’s to you bud.

Aimee

https://kasugano.tumblr.com/post/154832341580 Well I figured I would try! I will do everything in my power to keep Maddison here on Skype survivor island. https://rainbowkarolina.tumblr.com/post/612534208936755200/ I just keep losing one close friend after another in this game. I’ve honestly become numb to it at this point. I just see that light at the end of the tunnel. 2 weeks just 2 more weeks. I don’t plan on going to jury. I’m just so excited to finally reconnect with my people at the end. I’ll keep fighting like I’ve been doing since day 1. I feel like Maddison being voted out just kicked me into overdrive. The adrenaline is here and I’m ready for what’s to come next. This lady is strong and a fighter. https://rainbowkarolina.tumblr.com/post/613061232697753600/

Cody A

https://youtu.be/S8iY2_ho8-Y

#episodes

0 notes

tellywoodtrash · 6 years

Text

status update:

So, I got a few friendly, good-natured asks on how I was doing, and what’s up with my life (work, Chandler, etc.), so I suppose this is as good a time to tell everyone: I quit my job earlier this week.

Early followers of the blog may be aware that this blog started as an attempt to find some kinda peace during some very trying times in my life. Since then, I’ve been burning the candle at both ends (I guess, in some kinda misguided attempt to move on with life) and... it’s finally caught up with me. I’m fucking exhausted and at a breaking point. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. ('Spiritually. Ecumenically. Grammatically.' Name that movie!) And so, I'm giving myself a break and am going to be taking some time off to focus on my mental health.

However, this hasn’t been an easy decision to make, as it means bye-bye financial independence and my ~~riproaring Sex And The City life (snort, NOT) and that I will now have to pack up my entire life and leave the country I (and Chandler!) call home. So the next few days will be even rougher; full of transition and second-guessing myself. But in the long run, I think I need to do this now before things get much worse.

Poor Chandler has no idea what’s coming up; that he’s about to be unceremoniously stuffed into a box and flown many thousand miles to a whole new country, with strange new smells and creatures (including my relatives who will want to come around every now and then and friendly-ly harass our socially anxious butts.) I just hope we both survive this move!

As for what it means for the blog, it’ll mostly be business as usual, I suppose. I will have more free time, but it’s going to be invested in moving, and settling in, and recovery (first I have to recover from the moving and settling in, and only then can I focus on *actual* recovery) so... I’ll do as much as I can. Yes, there's lots of new shows, most of them better than IB, and I might wanna watch them too, but.... idk, I don't seem to have it in me right now to get invested in a whole... new.... thing. We'll see once I'm properly settled into a restful routine where I don't feel so battered in the brain. On the plus side, moving to India means proper access to Hotstar and Sony Liv and alllllllll the platforms; I won’t have to jump through hoops and diddle around with VPNs to access what I wanna watch! Yaaaaaaay!

There are a few things blog-wise that I just have to address though, because they’re srsly stressing me out a lot lately:

Messages asking me to explain WHY stakeholders in the industry (actors, makers, the channel) make the decisions they do. Bhai main kahan un sab ke ghar ya boardroom mein ghussi baithi hoon, ki mujhe pakka pata hoga???? All I can do is speculate like the rest of you. Which is what I do. I look at the facts that I do have (social media posts, TRP reports, etc.) and put out MY theory. But it’s all it is. A theory. I do not have any kind of information that you also do not have access to. Asking me to explain the inner workings of complete strangers' minds is just nonsensical. I do not have the complete information based on which I can give you an accurate answer. So please just stop asking me these. At this point, idek why *I* do half the things I do, let alone have any surety of anyone else’s decisions.

Complaints. Look, all of us have complaints about the shitshow that is IB, and the Tellywood industry at large, and its affairs both off-screen and on-screen. But just think of my plight when news breaks/an episode airs and I get like 10 anons in an hour, most of which are filled with cribbing. OVER SOMETHING I DON’T HAVE ANY CONTROL. You have all the right to complain, sure, but not IN MY INBOX. I only publish about 30 - 40% of the asks that I actually do receive, and because of that you may think that you’re the only person sending in this to me; but trust that more often that not, you’re not. I most probably have already received least 5 messages about it, in varying degrees of negative, and it’s exhaaaaaausting for me to wade through it all.

"Asks” that are just STATEMENTS, with no real question to them. I get these and whether I agree with your statement or not, my only reaction is “.... haan, toh???” What really is the point of these? I have nothing to contribute to them. It’s just YOU deciding that your opinion is sooooooo important that you must come tell ME it. In my inbox. On anon. Which is not just stupid, but also RUDE af. What you're doing is the equivalent of going and ringing the doorbell of a stranger's house and monologuing in their face about a random topic when they open the door. Like, I literally did not ask?????? Especially since you’re on anon and I have absolutely no personal equation with you. By having an open inbox, I didn't consent to being the receptacle of every opinion wrt Tellywood under the sun. Like, the whole point of this blog is so I can shout MY dumbass opinions into the void that is the internet without bothering anyone else about things they might not care about/agree with. Anyone who follows/engages with me is here by THEIR choice. Why don’t you do the same? Go make your own blog, instead of using mine. There’s only place for one person here on this blog, and that’s me. Please read your messages before sending them and ask yourselves: Does my tone/content leave anything open for discussion? (FYI: Just putting a question mark at the end of a sentence does not make an engaging question that opens up a discussion.) What contribution am I inviting from the recipient with this message? If the answer is “no”/"nothing", then please don't send it.

The rise of combative and contrary asks; ones that don't come out of a genuine curiosity, but with the intent to mindlessly argue, talk in circles without a point and overall, and just belittle the opinions I’ve expressed by engaging in whataboutery. There's a point at which "healthy discussion" ends, and "debating" starts, and I’m not here to engage in Debate Hour. The open askbox (or replies function) is NOT an invitation to pick at ONE sentence of some post (often missing the context; those other sentences are there for a reason y'know) and demand explanations from me, for which I have to then bend over backwards to clarify to some random faceless person on the internet. Not only does it take tremendous amounts of time and energy (for what is largely a pointless endevour: these people aren't really here to have an exchange of ideas or even try to see my point of view, they're just trying to force THEIR contrary opinion ON me), it really sucks the joy out of the blog for me. Look, I am not an idiot. I can correlate writing patterns and associate them with previously seen comments/opinions and make educated guesses on who these may be coming from. I've been holding off on blocking anyone yet, but these comments and asks have me seriously considering it. (And FYI: blocking an anon blocks you via IP address. So don't think ki 'oh ho ho, I can just hide under the anon function, coz that has no consequences.' All you'd be doing is proving my guesses right, as to who is whom.) I don't WANT TO go to such extents, and want this still to be a place where people can approach me, but this gross disrespect of my time and boundaries is beginning to wear on me now. Before coming at me, please think to yourself if what you're saying is actually necessary. If it's just a passive-aggressive counter-argument to my opinion that's all conjecture/opinion (i. e. things without factual basis and based on feelings) then please; you're very welcome to whatever you believe, but I don't care. If I wanted your opinion, I’d ask for it. If I care for your opinion, I will engage with your posts (by liking or commenting or reblogging or sending you my love in your inbox.) I just really really don’t care what anyone's opinion ON MY OPINION is. Please stop being contrary just the sake of it and ruining my day and mood. Go chronicle your opinions on your blog/twitter/whatever, instead of using MY blog as a platform and arm-twisting me into participating in this unpleasant exchange. I just don't have have the energy or interest to engage in this fuckery anymore.

Look you guys, I love getting stuff in the askbox. I do. If I didn’t, I’d just have closed the askbox and called it a day. I’m just asking that you be a little THOUGHTFUL about the recipient, me, AS AN ACTUAL LIVING PERSON WITH FEELINGS AND A LIMITED AMOUNT OF ENERGY AND TIME, instead of some kinda faceless robot who just processes your messages in binary and spits out an answer. Before engaging, please re-read your message to consider your tone and content and the impact on the person on the other end. Despite this request, if you just decide to engage in the above mentioned ways, I’m sorry in advance if you end up getting blocked; but things have reached a point where I have to look out for myself, and my comfort, and what I want from this space. I would like this blog to be source of joy in my (and others’!) life, not something that I feel resentful about, or as a source of draining what little energy I have left.

Sooooooo, that’s how it is! Things should be the same around here barring some periods of inactivity occasionally due to moving/spotty internet (but the queue should be running anyway.) A lot less negativity and gloom, hopefully! Wish me (and Chandler!!!!!) luck and please send us all your good, restful, soft and fluffy vibes!

(The restful slumber of a poor fluffy bastard who has NOOOOOOOOO idea of what the next few weeks have in store for him.)

#status update

24 notes · View notes

arsenicolada · 7 years

Note

I have seen that 'story' go around a lot and I still don't know what it is. WHAT is My Immortal??

Ok buddy get yourself comfortable cause this is gonna be a long one:

Let’s go all the way back to 2006, when the internet was just becoming a thing to young people. Back when a majority of the websites we know today were either just starting out or just starting to pick up in popularity, including fanfiction.net. A lot of fanfictions had already filled the archives, both bad and good, but one fanfiction in particular caught people’s attention almost immediately. And it was ‘My Immortal’ by “Tara Gilesbie”, or ‘XXXbloodyrists666XXX’ as was her username on the website. Supposedly taking place in the world of Harry Potter, this particular fanfic gets to a point where, had it not been for the actual characters’ names being present, you can’t really tell what it’s supposed to be referencing as it has very little acknowledgement of the source material’s canon. The story’s main focus is “Tara’s” self-insert OC, Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way. Also known as Enoby, Egogy, Evony, Ibony, or just Tara. To anyone who has only heard of ‘My Immortal’, it just sounds like your typical run of the mill “mary sue” fanfiction. But what made ‘My Immortal’ stand above the rest were three things: the butchered grammar, the author’s seemingly obsession with the gothic subculture, and the mary sue herself.

The grammar is terrible, there is just no other way to put it. “Tara” had a very distinct way of writing, which was better exemplified in her ‘author’s notes’, her little thoughts that she always puts at the very beginning of each chapter or sometimes at the end. And other times in the middle of her story, to either talk back to the ‘flamerz’, go on about how much she loves a band she mentioned, or point out a pun she made. And it all greatly resembles someone sending a text message:

“AN: STOP flaming! if u flam it menz ur a prep or a posr! Da only reson Dumbledeor swor is coz he had a hedache ok an on tup of dat he wuz mad at dem 4 having sexx! PS im nut updating umtil I get five good revoiws!”

That kind of style is present throughout the whole story. Granted the actual chapters have better spelling, but the way it’s put together is all the same. And it actually worsens the further it goes to the near point of illegibility. In fact, legend has it that the story’s grammar was apparently so bad that fanfiction.net deleted it due to the sudden drop of intelligence on the site. No one knows if that’s true, most likely not as that seems like quite a stretch. However, it was actually deleted, perhaps by Tara herself, though she later reposted it.

But the real kicker is exactly how the fanfic interprets the source material. Hogwarts is no longer a school of wizardry divided by bestowed houses, but is now a more high school-based setting where everyone is divided by cliques, though only three are present. Goths, preps, and posers:

•Goths are the good kids. They’re the only ones who understand this dark and depressing world better than anyone else, and shows their individuality by shopping at Hot Topic together and listening to the same exact bands. They’re also half vampires for some reason. And they’re all part of Slytherin even if they’re originally from another house in the actual story.

•Preps are the mean kids. They just like, totally don’t understand goths so they’re like so mean to them and call them scary and stuff. They’re all just bitchy and are like totally jealous of the goths and only shop at stores like American Eagle and only listen to crappy music like Hilary Duff. And all those stupid preps are in Gryffindor.

•Posers are just goth wannabes who listen to Avril Lavigne and probably don’t even know who Good Charlotte is. What houses are they even in, no one knows and no one gives a shit. They’re mostly there just to show the reader what being goth is really all about.

And above them all is the only true goth, the queen of Mary Sues herself, Ebony. Now the definition of what makes a “mary sue” has been drastically skewed over the years, and probably shouldn’t even be relevant anymore, but if you at the very least want a true-to-heart example, Ebony is the way to go. Tara’s obsession with being goth is greatly reflected in this character. She loves bands like My Chemical Romance, Good Charlotte, Simple Plan, and Evanescence (who wrote the song ‘My Immortal’ which this fanfic is named after). She shops at Hot Topic and wears the type of clothing that any 13 year old goth wishes they could. In fact, Ebony’s outfits are always described in great detail and takes up to almost paragraphs in every chapter:

“For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow.”

And trust me when I say they only get longer. It isn’t just the outfit descriptions though, the whole entire story is written in Ebony’s favor. Like a Hot Topic being in Hogsmede despite it being a nonmagical store (not to mention being an american chain) and a club where Ebony’s favorite bands just happen to be playing concerts in despite being muggle bands. And how cutting, underage drinking, and smoking is glamorized as being “dark” and “beautiful” and has no repercussions whatsoever. And how there’s no uniforms so Ebony can show off her over the top wardrobe.

Since Ebony is the main character and this is a fanfiction, all of Tara’s favorite characters from the Harry Potter world are Ebony’s gothic friends and accompany her in Slytherin, even if they’re canonly in other houses as I’ve mentioned previously. And all of Tara’s hated characters are Ebony’s enemies, and are depicted as either nasty preps or a bunch of posers that belong in Gryffindor. It doesn’t stop there though, as all the male characters have a thing for Ebony because she is just so sexy and looks exactly like Amy Lee. But Ebony only focuses on her two main love interests, Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter, who now goes by Vampire Potter because he likes the taste of human blood.

This is all just the very basics of the fanfiction, there are plenty of more absurdities you’ll stumble upon the further you read. Like Voldemort and the Death Eaters disguising themselves as My Chemical Romance, Snape video taping Ebony taking a bath, characters from different sources making cameos like Marty Mcfly, the list goes on.

But what truly, TRULY made ‘My Immortal’ such a phenomenon is that no one knew if it was legit. There were two sides to how people felt about it, those who thought it was a real story and Tara at the time was another young angsty teen who had just been introduced to the internet (which would explain the terrible grammar and botched sex scenes), and those who thought the story was one big joke written by a genius troll who made Tara up as a persona, which was extremely plausible since everything about the story was so wrong and completely blown out of proportion that there was no possible way someone could’ve come up with it and been completely serious. But people on the other side have argued that they’d have a very, VERY dedicated troll.

One of the biggest factors to their argument was Tara’s friend Raven, who not only had her own OC named Willow that was featured in the story, but also had a helping hand in writing it. She even had her own fanfiction.net account called ‘bloodytearz666’. Raven was Tara’s creative filter, as she was in charge of spelling and grammar and came up with some plot points in the story. At least until chapter 16 when the two apparently had a falling out and Tara killed off Willow, but later brought Willow back as an apology. So this troll would’ve had to not only make Tara, but also make Raven as a means to support their persona, unless Raven was created by a second troll. But both of those trolls would’ve had to write other stories pre and post ‘My Immortal’, as well as manage several social media accounts, which is a whole lot of effort just for the sake of making a joke.

Since the story was made, many people have come forward claiming they are the mysterious Tara, with promises of more material and continuations of the infamous story. So no one knew for sure who Tara is or her whereabouts. Until now.

After years and years of shrouded mystery, “Tara” has finally logged back into her more than decade old account and revealed herself to be Rose Christo. As it turns out, she co-wrote ‘My Immortal’ with Raven, who was actually a real person and her friend, during a very hard time in her life. And it wasn’t for a reason most might have thought. She revealed that she purposely made it as bad as possible so she could gain enough publicity to find her younger brother that she had been separated from.

She even wrote a memoir about it that is set to be published in 2018, which you can read about here.

You can also read the fanfiction itself if you’re interested here. Even if it did turn out to be a fake, it’s still a very humorous read, and very interesting since we now know its backstory.

EDIT: So as it turns out the whole thing with Rose was a hoax and the real Tara is still out there. Waiting, longing, in a dark alley with her hand stretched out so that I may one day shake it.

#bunny-carrothunter #pirate fabbles #my immortal

85 notes · View notes