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ot3 · 1 year

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omg thank you for being the first normal person I've seen so far about AI who's also an artist T-T like obviously all the stealing is horrible and it's good it's talked about but almost everyone really is acting like the idea of computers being capable of creating images killed their firstborn child

(also I don't mean it as one of the weird AI art bros but as an artist myself I'm just glad that there are other artist with open mind to the concept)

no right like its insane to me to see how many other people who seem reasonable and level headed are falling for the kneejerk response to say ai Isn't Art Can't Be Art ! It's throwing out the baby with the bathwater to an almost incomprehensible degree.

Unfortunately the fact of the matter is that we live in an era where essentially all new technology's first and prime purpose will be for ghoulish, capitalistic, anti-human ends. But to reject any other uses for the technology doesn't do anything other than make you look like an anti-tech weirdo. This is genuinely insanely impressive and revolutionary tech! There are a TON of legitimate artistic uses for AI image generation.

It also seems weird that everyone is delving into this false binary of 'dont use AI, learn to draw' as if there is any conceivable reason for these things to be mutually exclusive? Like, before all of the AI discourse really popped off i was doing some experimenting with using AI in my process.

the texturing used in this drawing was made by VQGAN + Clip (different type of image generation than the stable diffusion model that is producing most of the AI art that's up for debate right now) running through google colab. I made a bunch of these weird, ethereal images that would have been almost impossible for me to produce under my own power - it would have taken a titanic amount of time, effort, and design to produce any of these through illustrative or photo editing techniques.

here's a sampling of some of the textures i made. Now I think it would be a real struggle to try and claim that these images made are plagiarisms. However, I stopped messing with the google colab generation for one key reason: i didnt know enough about the image databases being used to train these models. That's the real stumbling block

the internet is CHOCK FULL of images that are free to use commercially and repurposes, there's stuff like wikimedia commons, the smithsonian open access, unsplash and pexels which have free stock photos, etc. I honestly think a nonzero amount of artists would consent to having some of their work used in image generation databases if they were promised noncommercial use of the resulting images, also. But the problem is the people training these AI don't give a shit about any of that. It's just the complete entitlement to other people's work and neglect for creative boundaries that makes AI generation bad.

The fact that people are attempting to replicate the art of living, working artists, or people like kentaro miura who by all accounts were so dedicated to the craft that they worked themselves to death sickens me. And the fact that the companies responsible for this are using that as an active selling point for their product is even worse. It's a pretty miserable time to be an artist, and this is just the icing on the cake.

But I don't want silicon valley greed and bizarre, impotent jealousy from redditors who want custom waifu jpgs to mean that nobody who could really benefit from AI image generation gets to use it.

like, my dad for example. he's been a creative person his whole life but it never really went anywhere. He drew a lot as a kid and then went and got a degree in filmmaking. My parents were living in LA when I was born, with my dad managing a filming/sound studio and the two of them trying to break into writing screenplays. This did not happen because they had three kids, and for the past decade and then some my dad had been doing database programming on contract for the CDC. Now, in his mid 50s, he's finally got a permanent and secure position and, rather than spending all his free time raising children or getting PMP certified to try and angle for a string of promotions, he can start having hobbies again. there's a comic he's been wanting to draw for as long as I can remember.

only, one big problem - in 2021 he had surgery on his cataracts and never healed properly. He's got severely impaired vision and looking at stuff too hard for to long causes him a ton of eye strain and pain. He has to look at a lot of screens for his job so by the time he's off work for the day he's pretty much too fatigued to do all the intense visual stuff it'd take to make a comic.

I wanted to tell him AI image generation could help him make the kind of stuff he always dreamed about making as a kid but instead I had to tell him that as it stands, the predatory nature of AI modeling means it's insanely hard to use it without ripping off vulnerable creatives. Instead we chatted a bit about combining 3d assets, digitally edited photos, or photobashing/digital kitbashing methods to try and make a pipeline he could do without drawing, but the time commitment to learn these methods is probably just not feasible unless his eyes make a pretty unprecedented recovery in future years.

Like, that's the worst thing about all of this. The idea that AI makes the production of certain kinds of art more accessible to people with disabilities isn't just a 'gotcha' being used by the pro-AI people, it's also true. I would love for my dad to be able to make his comic. I myself also have a huge string of health issues and sometimes the main thing stopping me from drawing is that it hurts to do so. Anything in my process that could reduce the strain drawing puts on my body is an accessibility concern in some ways. Eventually degrading so much that I can't draw at all is one of my biggest fears.

But that doesn't counter all of the negatives! It just doesnt! Which fucking sucks man it just sucks so fucking bad that we have this cool incredible thing and we can't use it without being complicit in some stuff i am fully ideologically against! As things stand I really cant imagine that 'ethical' AI image generation will ever exist, so unfortunately it will have to be in the hands of the people using it to decide for themselves if they are using it in a way that is predatory or harmful, or as a legitimate tool to make meaningful works of art.

#sorry to go on this whole rant ive just been percolating on these thoughts for awhile.#long post #ai #i know this comes off as preachy im just passionate about this subject

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adiduck · 8 months

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I just read your snippets from the unlucky ones and Holy Sprinkles. I'm gonna go freakin feral here. Please tell me you're gonna publish it eventually. I will sell you my firstborn child.

JFIAJFIDLAJFLASFJA hello!

Yes, rest assured, @frostbitebakery and I have been working on this monster of a story for ages now, and it is now in my hands for the writing. It's one of the fics I am actively working on, though It's a beast of a fic, so it may take me a bit, alas. I fully fully intend to get it out there for everyone to read eventually, though!

#the unlucky ones #adi is a writer #the process #ask replies

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unohanadaydreams · 1 year

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Mars I will sell you my hypothetical firstborn child if you write something with Grimmjow + spanking please. 👀👀

Hand over the hypothetical firstborn at your convenience, anon.

Features: 18+, spanking, hair pulling, reader is deeply embarrassed by wanting said spanking, Grimmjow wants to eat through that shame like a juicy, juicy fruit.

GRIMMJOW + SPANKING

Stretched teeth, uncovered from root to crown, jab into the tensed skin above your shoulder blade. A fossil of his previous, unknowable self, the mask of smooth bone is wholly inhuman.

You stiffen further when he does it again. Inherit instinct enmeshing to your modern sense of shame and want. You try to curl away. The wiry length of his arms, his hands meeting at your stomach, keep you flat.

“You’re getting scared over nothing.”

The warm puffs of breath that had raised a trail of damp along your back were plenty to be embarrassed over. You shivered as the sloppy line of condensation cooled. The thrumming want in you unfurled, fronds of pleasure straightening to meet the heat Grimmjow generated.

Shifting you more squarely in his lap, fingers squirmed between your pressed thighs.

“Grimmjow,” you squeaked, then said, then whined.

Smiling, the human side of his face rubbed against your cheek and he mocked you. Called your name in three between puffs of humor.

You tugged at the ropey muscles of his forearms, scrambled at his elbows, and struggled to keep your thighs tight while your fingers slipped uselessly over his.

“What’s it about humans and wanting punished?”

Switching tactics, you reached back, tugging at Grimmjow’s hair.

“Please don’t say anymore,” you said, one of your hands holding onto the sharp, exaggerated cheekbone of his fragmented mask as the other gripped at the roots of any hair you could hold.

“Why? I liked it too. Everyone looks better roughed up,” Grimmjow said. His fingers forced between your thighs in earnest.

The moment you moved to stop him, you found yourself bouncing on the mattress you’d gotten cheap, third-hand, and feeling like springboard. If Grimmjow hadn’t grabbed you, you would’ve rolled to the floor.

As he lay on his lap, your ass comfortably in range of his prominent hand, you wish you’d rolled to the floor.

At least your face was pressed into the sheets and he wasn’t forcing you to look him in the eyes. At least he was tugging your underwear down your thighs instead of ripping through them. At least he was doing exactly what you wanted while being blessedly sile—

“I don’t get why you watch videos of it, but don’t say you want it,” he said, ruining your list of things to be grateful for. “You humans….so scared to say you like this stuff when that’s half of what the video box plays. That’s what I’m punishing you for. Not gonna stop till you tell me what you want.”

Grimmjow talks about it so casually that you’re blindsided by the first hit and you cough on inhaled spit.

He squeezes one cheek, toying with it until you calm.

Then smacks you again.

Your legs tremble and hips circle by the third hit.

“Us hollows have hard skin,” he grunts as he smacks you again. “Im barely hitting, y’know. You’re just sensitive.”

Grimmjow makes every spank unpredictable. Some coming right after another while others strike after he’s massaged the blanket of stinging needles from your ass cheeks.

The only sound you can bear to emit are cries from being smacked and moans as he works you up between them.

Admitting you like all the things in the porn he caught you watching seems impossible. Saying you want him to hit harder and more and do it all while he’s inside you is an insurmountable task.

“Say something and I’ll pull your hair,” Grimmjow purrs.

Your face is hot and sticky from breathing into the sheets as you turn so your cheek is rubbing against the lowest thread count known to home goods.

He spanks you several times before you can from words beyond ‘uh’ or ‘it uh’.

“It feels good.”

“You like it a lot?”

Grimmjow’s fingers, the curve of his nails less wicked than he likes them to be, but rounded so he can touch you, unfettered, move to where your hair has been gathered into a thick scrunchie.

“Yes,” you agree as he spanks you and pulls your hair and grows harder underneath you.

You’re mutually stubborn, but Grimmjow is sure to hear the words he wants by the end of the night. He’s relentless. He can claw anything from anyone.

All you have to cling to is a crust of human shame thinly withholding your desires. Still, you twist sheets into your fists as he lifts your head and spanks you again.

You cling.

#reader: I’ll NEVER be honest about my desires!!!!!#Grimmjow: damn ma you live like this #Grimmjow x reader #grimmjow jaegerjaquez x reader #bleach imagines #Grimmjow x you #okay I’m finally posting kink asks pls hold your applause at my below bare minimum ❤️

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borahaerhy · 1 year

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D-Day is an absolute masterpiece; let's discuss.

Obscenely long description of each of the songs under the cut

TL;DR: I'm an emotional wreck and this is the best album I've ever heard for so many reasons.

Haegeum??? That MV??? Never wanted to quit my job and start a gang that bullied the rich and steals their money more in my life (and trust me, that's something I've wanted to do since I was like 13). Yoongi is the only rich man I'd ever let lecture me about capitalism. He can do it all day every day. This is a fucked system, but thank you for turning me on while lecturing me about it and murdering people with some dirty chopsticks 🥴

D-Day is absolutely sick, 100% exactly what I'd expect from him. How a song can go so hard and still be so poetic to me is just insane. The beat is SICKENING. The chorus? CATCHY. 10/10 song, perfect opener to the album and set's the tone for the rest that's coming in an amazing way.

HUH?! killed me. We open the song with "what the shit do you know about me" and bro? Nothing, ion know shit about fuck, but you got me all the way fucked up with that attitude. Hoseok?? THE "HUH"S EVERYWHERE?? dead. deceased. The beat? Would literally sell my soul to be able to be in the studio when that man makes anything. I went to school to be an audio engineer, I've seen the way people put music together and create these catchy ass beats and have even made a few of my own, but FUCK BRO THERE'S NOTHING BETTER THAN THIS MAN IN THE STUDIO.

^^That goes for every song, not just Huh, but I just thought that it was important for EVERYONE to know that I'd sacrifice my firstborn child just to watch this man work.

AMYGDALA had me in tears. I was literally sobbing reading the lyrics. There are no words I can say that will accurately express how I feel about this song. This song has been out for less than 24 hours and I already feel so close to it, I can't even begin to describe it. The way most of the instruments fall out in the pre-chorus just so they can all come back in the chorus for that intensity with him basically yelling the lyrics is just *chef's kiss*.

SDL Is so cute and heartbreaking at the same time. The chorus is everything, so beautiful. Talk about bitter sweet lyrics, I'm eating that shit up. His vocals are absolutely outstanding, that "I'm thinking 'bout you" is making me so delulu you have no idea.

People Pt. 2 has already been out, but man that song is gorgeous. IU's vocals are such a great contrast to Yoongi's rap, and when they harmonize I wanna start crying whY DO THEY SOUND SO GOOD??!

I'M NOT KIDDING YOU WHEN I SAY I WAS CRYING, LEGIT SOBBING THE FIRST TIME I HEARD POLAR NIGHT. The instrumental is so uniquely Yoongi, and makes you feel so much. Yoongi is one of the only artists whos music makes me feel what they feel; and this song is the best representation of that. Everytime i listen to it I have to stop myself from crying and it has nothing to do with the lyrics. I cried before I even knew what the song was about, just because that's how good of a composer and producer he is. Genuinly one of the best songs I've ever heard.

I've never had an interlude make me feel so much. He's perfected the art of making his music invoke the emotions of his listeners and there's nothing more perfect than a minute-and-a-half-long interlude with no words in it that's still able to do that. Incredible.

Snooze is honestly one of the best thing's to have ever graced this planet if i'm being 100% rn. I know I keep talking about the emotion of the music but broooo. And the Woosung feature? His voice is amazing and is already so raw and emotional and paired with this song I just cannot. The lyrics make me want to sob, which I will probably do later when I get off work. And the the reference back to So Far Away? I'm on the floor someone please hug me.

Yoongi's vocals go fucking crazy in Life Goes On. If this was my introduction to Yoongi I would 100% believe that he's a singer and has been his whole life. The pure raw talent of this man will never cease to amaze me.

In conclusion, I love Min Yoongi with my whole chest and I hope he knows how much his music helps people, because it really, really helps. I can never even fully express just how this album alone helps me, that's not even speaking about all his other solo projects and the hundreds of songs he's worked on throughout his career.

If you read all of that I love u and I hope u have a spectacular day.

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yeonwoos-innocence · 2 months

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Chapter 138 (WHERE BACK BABBYY!!!)

My essay-long rants are back let's go!!!

It's been so long since we last got an update and as a comeback, (courtesy of Esol) this chapter has a lot to talk about.

But even though I have sooo much to say (I mean a lot) let's start from the beginning, shall we?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The meeting with Yeownoo and Junhyuk in the hospital... The emotions that happened during were so intense

The tears!

The groveling!!

DID I MENTION THE GROVELING!!!

Now I'm going to be completely honest I was lowkey (Scratch that highkey) mad at Junhyuk for leaving Yeonwoo but I honestly understand that it was because he just wanted to pursue his passion. And even though I did get some enjoyment (a lot of enjoyment) from him apologizing for leaving Yeownoo that does not mean I'm not devastated that he broke his leg and can no longer pursue what he wants to do. That killed me. I'm not okay.

I was ready to throw my phone across the room when Yeonwoo started crying. That single panel of him just silently crying... I don't think I'm going to be okay for a while (that's a lie I'm living) the Angst in this chapter was so delicious.

I ate good. (Yummy)

Man! Don't even get me started on how Junhyuk is like "I swear I won't ever leave you again" I cannot be the only person who yelled LIAR!!! because that's exactly what he's doing right now! Smh.

Jokes aside the talk on the rooftop

The way Junhyuk shifts from I must hold that piece of trash accountable for what he did to my best friend to I will never let anybody find out what happened to my best friend. I was gagged.

The fact that in the beginning, Junhyuk was thinking what everybody is thinking currently as we read this "Tell someone! Anyone!! what happened to you!!!" shows you just how bad the situation is, and how he originally wasn't like this. Also bringing into light how their codependent really started right there. On the rooftop.

The look on Yeonwoo's face when Junhyuk told him that he knew what happened and that he wanted to tell his parents and file a school violence report...

That is honesty when it clicked for me just how bad everything is. Like previously it clicked but that look on his face tells me that Yeonwoo was never going to tell a single soul about what happened even if there was a guarantee that he would be fine.

Junhyuk only found out about what happened to Yeonwoo by pure chance. That's it. If he just had not walked into that classroom on that specific rainy day and look at the attendance sheet he would not have known a thing. (It's really got ideas going through my head about what would have happened if he just kept walking...)

Now to the main part of this entire chapter. The part that's been setting everybody on fire and making everybody want to sell their firstborn child for the chance to never have read this chapter in the first place.

The jumping threat.

Yeownoo's breakdown?! OMG!

I genuinely had to pause for an extended period of time. Because, the way I gasped when he pulled out that knife. I was screaming at my screen knowing damn well he can't hear me 'PUT THAT DOWN!!!'

(the fact that I read it like 30 minutes after it came out and it was like crack of dawn was not helpful)

Yeonwoo pulling out that knife and telling Junhyuk not to tell a single soul and that panel with his expression (you know the one I'm talking about) had me weak!

The utter desperation on his face and absolute fear of what happened to him being found out that really brings into consideration just how badly it affected him. Like I knew that what happened to him screwed up his mental state, but seeing just how desperate he was...

I'm going to have nightmares. I'm going to have nightmares just from that one panel alone. Plus all this happening behind a beautiful sunset is diabolical. Like a beautiful backdrop but a depressing scenario?! (I gotta take notes)

Esol really knows how to pull those angst punches, doesn't she?

What makes this worse is that throughout all of this, Junhyuk just wants to help his friend but ultimately ends up becoming complicit is so sad. Everything really accumulated here. Their codependency started here. On the rooftop of the hospital.

All junhyuk wants is to have Yeonwoo be safe. For him to be happy again but at the end of the day, he just couldn't do it.

And the way this ties back to Haesol and how he thinks only she can do that is just so smart yet so diabolical!!

One of my favorite parts is when Junhyuk is reaching out towards Yeonwoo!!!

That very panel was foreshadowed I don't know how many chapters before?!! I recognized it immediately and I was ecstatic but also shocked because I was speechless...

Originally I thought that panel was because when Yeonwoo found out what happened to Junhyuk's leg he fainted and Junhyuk caught him before he fell but the fact that this panel is because Junhyuk was trying to save Yeonwoo from killing himself? Oh my God, I don't know how but Esol is able to just take the angst and ramp it up in ways that I just cannot fathom.

GOD!

She is diabolical!!!

Then right after that, we get the look of increasing terror and petrification on Junhyuk's face when he realizes, this is serious. When he realizes that Yeonwoo is not okay to an EXTREME extent and if he does tell a single person what happened, Yeownoo is going to kill himself.

The flashback to the beginning of middle school when Yeonwoo was just smiling and happy. The flashback of his brother being irreparably damaged in a way that he cannot even begin to understand. The tears that come down his face when he pleads and begs and sobbs to Yeonwoo that-

"I'll do what you say! I won't say anything... just please, don't die."

OH, GOD!!!

Junhyuk pleading to Yeonwoo to not die is just so gut-wrenching it hurts so goooodd!!!

That is the most angsty we have gotten and I am here for more because I already know once this Arc is over it's going to get worse. (⁠•⁠‿⁠•⁠)

Here's the important part. The panel at the end where Yeonwoo is like I'm so sorry. The dead look in his eyes while the tears flow down his face... its so good and I automatically knew that this was a manipulation tactic.

Now don't take the word I use manipulation to be a bad thing because it's not.

Yeonwoo is simply doing what he thinks he needs to do for Junhyuk to not tell a single soul that he was assaulted. Especially his parents.

That is important his parents are a big reason why he's not telling anybody. After all the hardship his parents had to conceive him, them finding out that he was assaulted in middle school is going to break them. I sympathize with him. In all honesty, would you really want your parents to find out what happened to you especially after the circumstances of your birth were already so traumatizing for them?

Yeonwoo is just a teen doing what he thinks he must to keep from anyone knowing what happened. He said himself that he's too scared to kill himself so there's no way he would go through with it. This hit hard on my second reread when Yeonwoo mumbled "Is this a joke to you," kind of like he was thinking about what he'd have to do for Junhyuk to not tell his parents.

Jumping off the rooftop was his conclusion, and it worked.

Yeah.

The nuance in the layers is just so good.

Don't even get me started on how when this Arc of their friendship is over I already know that Haesol is next because of the little bits of foreshadowing we got that she was not happy with the current situation.

YEONSOL ANGST BABBYYY!!!

I'M GOING TO EAT THAT UP!!!!

Think about it. If you're boyfriend is going on and on for a week plus about how his best friend is not talking to him anymore and acting the way Yeonwoo is when you know that their relationship is not healthy. That the codependence that they exhibit towards each other is not okay. And instead of saying something about that you bottle it up.

Oohhh!!! I already know the angst between these two is going to go crazy.

Overall this chapter was great and the fact that this is the way that Esol decides to welcome us back is giving me the beginning of season 3 flashbacks because dear God that was not a time to be a Yeonwoo's Innocence fan. Ooohh. Pain and suffering.

There is so much more to talk about and I have so many more things to say but overall I loved this chapter and the way it foreshadows future things and also brings to light the previous foreshadowings that happened before it was absolutely amazing and I loved it and I'm going to go back and reread the manhwa for the umpteenth time so that I can catch every bit of foreshadowing that happened before and post that on my Twitter thread because that is insanity.

I love this chapter so much and to keep this from being any longer I'm going to stop it here.

Tell me what your guys's thoughts are in the comments because we need to talk about this!!!

This chapter was a bombshell and it was so good!

Absolutely devastating, but so good!!!

-Kimira

#yeonwoo's innocence #manhwa #romance #shoujo #shoujo manga #shoujo manhwa #josei #anime #manga #yeonsol #manhwa recommendation #chapter review

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euphoricasblog · 9 months

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I just wanna say I at this point have watched RWRB like 5 times and STILL cannot get enough. AND APPARENTLY FOUND OUT THE ORIGINAL WAS SUPPOSED TO BE 3 HOURS LONG BEFORE CUTS?? When I tell you I would sell my soul or my firstborn child to see this directors cut- SO if you’re like me and wanna see more of our boys being dumb idiots in love.. SIGN THIS PETITION. Maaaaaybe if we get enough signatures we can take it to the head honchos at amazon prime and get them to release it!!

LINK: https://chng.it/hmg4ptkNBj

#red white and royal blue #firstprince #taylor zakhar perez #nicholas galitzine #matthew lopez #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #prince of wales #first son of the united states

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kandisheek · 3 months

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FIC REC WEEK 7 - ANGST

Break My Baby by justanotherrollingstony (adoctoraday)

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 17,786 Tags: Heavy BDSM, Dom!Tony/Sub!Steve, Painplay

Summary: Failure after failure weighs heavy on Steve, tearing him up inside till he's ready to scream. He fights so goddamn hard and yet nothing he does is right; he fails a mission, he fails to protect Sam, fails to find Bucky, fails to do what he knows he needs to and he's so angry he could fight a platoon of HYDRA and not break a sweat. Knotted up and all wrong, what he needs is something he can't afford to do; break down. Good thing Tony knows exactly how to give him what he needs.

Reasons why I love it: Steve is absolutely heart-breaking in this one, desperate and angry and lashing out like a cornered animal. And Tony is nothing shy of amazing at handling whatever Steve throws at him, giving him exactly what he needs to find his way back to himself. I love their characterizations here, and Stella really excels at both the dialogue and the emotional weight she put into this fic. I'd recommend this one to anyone who likes cathartic BDSM and is in the mood to cry some happy tears at the end.

Sucker Punch by Sineala

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: T Words: 20,586 Tags: Identity Porn, Canon Divergence, Not A Fix-It

Summary: Steve never quite warms to Tony Stark, Avengers benefactor. The Molecule Man never strips Iron Man out of his armor. Life goes on for the Avengers, but as disagreements split the team -- and Shellhead and Winghead -- again and again, Steve wonders why Iron Man always picks Tony over him. And when Steve finds out, it happens in the worst way possible.

Reasons why I love it: The mother of all angst fics. Seriously, if you asked me to describe the genre, I would hold up this fic like Simba on Pride rock. Armed with our prior knowledge of Tony being Ironman and having Steve as the narrator gives us the opportunity to watch at every moment how Steve just keeps digging his hole deeper and deeper, until it seems almost impossible for him to ever climb out. I would literally give my firstborn child for a continuation of this, but this fic is already a masterpiece, just the way it is. Please read it and join the circle of tears, we have cookies.

like history erasing itself by WhenasInSilks

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 20,536 Tags: Alcoholism, Sex Work, Extremely Dubious Consent

Summary: “Don’t worry,” Steve says. “I’m not buying anything you’re not selling.” Tony folds his arms, tugs the too-thin body of his jacket tighter around him. “You don’t know what I’m selling.” “I know what you’ve sold already. Next to that, this should be nothing.” “Get fucked,” Tony says, but Steve only laughs, an ugly, empty sound. Bloodless. False. “That’s the plan."

Reasons why I love it: Jesus Christ, this one is so sad. There's so much pain and anger and desperate hope that keeps getting crushed, and I just – god, I can't even describe how this fic makes me feel. Give this one a read if you want to experience it for yourself, but fair warning – it gets pretty dark in some spots.

#marvel #stony #fanfic #fic rec #fanfic rec #a year in fanfic recs #angst #ficrec

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multifandom-worlds · 10 months

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My Dear General - Chapter 1: A Gift for the Tolan Empire

Genre: angst

Word Count: 1.4k

Warnings: Parent selling their child for profit, sex slavery (concubine), Creepy Thor, mean family members, harsh/derogatory language

Authors Note: I know those warnings are a lot, and if they drive you away, I understand! Basically themed in the middle ages when concubines were common. Also, this is not a reflection on how I feel about Thor, I promise! Don't come for me! If I missed any warnings, please let me know!

Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5

Tags: @sarahscribbles @simplyholl @holdmytesseract @otome-and-fanfiction @lokisgoodgirl @buttercupcookies-blog @lokiprompts @ladyofthestayingpower

She was sitting in the back of the carriage, watching as the countryside of nothing passed at a snail's pace. Astrid, accompanied by her three brothers, Alaric, Arne, and Aidous, travels by horse and carriage from their home to the city of Thovur in the Tolan Empire, where Astrid is to remain for the rest of her days as a peace offering from the Kingdom of Azailia to Emperor Thor of the Tolan Empire. Being the only daughter of King Malik, it was, as he put it, her duty to occupy the Emperor for the rest of his life - or hers - to ensure he does not threaten her Kingdom.

Two of her brothers snicker at her, knowing exactly what she will endure. It did not matter that Astrid was the oldest of King Malik’s heirs, she was a woman, and thus, she was not worthy of the throne. Her brother’s paid her little respect - she simply was not wanted by her family. She herself suspected this was less about keeping the peace and more so just about getting rid of her completely.

She ignored her brother’s taunting, deciding to focus her thoughts on Thor and imagining what he must be like. How would he look? Would he be kind to her or rough? Is he the ruler legends speak of, or would he be different? Her thoughts drift to the General - Loki. There are rumours about him being the most ruthless killer in the entire empire, but also that he is one of the most ruggedly handsome men. Her thoughts shifted once again, this time to the last words her father spoke to her.

“My dearest daughter, my firstborn. You will be sent as a peace offering to Emperor Thor; he will care for you and give you the life I cannot offer you. Go now, my child. Follow your destiny. Protect your people.”

The way he spoke made the kingdom believe she was sent to become his queen, but Astrid wasn’t stupid - she read the correspondences; Thor wanted a concubine who could bore him heirs and nothing more. She had hoped she would have no chaperone for this trip so she could escape before arrival, but her brothers sat across from her, hindering her chances.

“Enjoy your gowns and fancy jewellery now, for once we arrive at the palace, you will be nothing, Princess.” She heard the oldest of her brothers, Alaric, say. The way he emphasized “princess” made her blood boil. He was mocking her, reminding her that she wasn’t going to be treated like a princess; she was going to be treated like a common whore. Arne laughed at her expense, thankful to finally be rid of their sister for good. Astrid closed her eyes, leaning against the seat, wishing for the journal to be over.

They enter the city after several long hours on a bumpy road before the Tolan Army flanks the carriage on all sides, forcing the driver to stop. The most commanding voice Astrid had ever heard before began relaying orders; the words were barely audible above the whinnying of horses outside. One of the most beautiful brown horses Astrid had ever seen made its way to the front of the carriage, the rider obscured by the roof before he dismounted his steed and his face finally came into view.

The general.

“Everybody out of the carriage and identify yourselves, now!” He orders, his voice gruff and powerful. Alaric stepped out first, his two brothers stepping out directly after him. They stand before the carriage door, preventing Astrid from following the famed general’s orders.

“Alaric sir, first prince of the Azailian Kingdom. These are my brothers, Arne and Aidous.”

Loki clicks his tongue in annoyance. “The pretentious, overzealous, incompetent sons of King Malik, I should have known. What brings you to Thovur? You are a little far from home, boy.”

Alaric, in awe of Loki, continues speaking, undeterred by his insults, while his brothers share apprehensive expressions. “We are delivering our sister to Emperor Thor and collecting the gold payment. The Emperor is expecting us.”

“I was unaware Malik had a daughter, although it does not surprise me that he would be one to sell his own child for partnership and protection during wartimes,” Loki spoke before glancing from the princes to Astrid, still in the carriage. “Step aside, or I will have you moved out of the way of the Princess.”

The three brothers immediately step to the side, not wanting to anger the general. Astrid tentatively steps down from the carriage, standing before Loki. Their eyes met briefly before Loki strides forward, bowing his head, the rest of the army kneeling, heads bowed. “Greetings, Princess. Welcome to Thovur.” Loki spoke before taking her hand in his and kissing it. Astrid blushes, this man was the first person in her life to treat her like this and sound genuine when addressing her as Princess.

Her cheeks burn a fiery crimson before Arne speaks up. “With all due respect, sir, our sister is not worthy of such titles. She is nothing but a whore; she is to be the Emperor’s concubine; she does not deserve such treatment.” Astrid’s expression drops - her brothers must ruin everything for her.

Loki turns his attention away from Astrid; his brows furrowed in anger as he levels his gaze on Arne. “Watch your mouth, boy.” He then turns his attention to Alaric and Aidous, placing his body between Astrid and her brothers. “Do you two share the same sentiments?”

Alaric does not hesitate to agree while the youngest, Aidous, looks down at his shoes, avoiding the general’s piercing stare and shifting his weight awkwardly. Alaric, frustrated with the youngest’s non-answer, decided to answer for him. “Yes, he does.”

Loki, angered by the answers he received, turned to one of his soldiers before giving orders. “Escort these two….” Loki begins, gesturing to Alaric and Arne, “....back to their land; they are to go no further; I shall bring the 3rd Prince and the Princess to my brother myself. Now, get these revolting, vile, immoral “men” out of my sight.”

Two soldiers rise before taking Alaric and Arne by the arms and unceremoniously shoving them into the carriage before instructing the driver to turn it around. Another soldier leads Aidous to their horse while Loki turns back to Astrid, offering his arm to her. “You, my Lady, will be riding my horse; that way, I can personally ensure your safety.”

Astrid cautiously takes his arm as he heads her to his horse, helping her on once they arrive. Once she was securely in the saddle, Loki took the reigns and began walking through the city to the palace. The townspeople bow their heads in utmost respect as the army passes through the streets, arriving at the palace gates.

Loki assists Astrid in dismounting before he escorts her and Aidous to the throne room, where Emperor Thor waits. “Ah, brother, how kind of you to accompany my newest breeder. She's even prettier than Malik wrote about. The fact he kept such a fertile flower hidden is a tragedy."

He steps down from his throne before striding over to Astrid, running the back of his finger down her cheek. "You are going to give me such beautiful heirs. Why wait until tonight?" Thor spoke in her ear. Astrid visibly tenses up, clenching her eyes tight as Thor's hands move down further her body, failing to notice her discomfort.

But Loki does.

His fingers clench into a fist, watching his oaf of a brother disrespect her. He spoke up, determined to buy the Princess sometime. "Brother, I fear you will have to wait, for you and I need to discuss expansion plans."

"The fate of the empire rests upon me having heirs to take over. I do not need to remind you who is Emperor, brother. Go now, take the boy and escort him home; I will have a courier deliver payment for her once I determine her worth.” He spoke with authority, leaving no place to argue. Loki resigns, taking Aidous by the shoulder as Thor returns his attention to Astrid. Her screams could be heard echoing through the palace.

“I’m sorry, son,” Loki says, his voice genuine. “I tried to buy your sister some time but couldn’t. It is obvious you do not share your brothers' feelings for her. I give you my word; I’ll do what I can to keep her safe here; it’s best you return. I will give you one of our horses.”

Aidous looks back at the palace doors with a frown. “Thank you, sir. If she attempts an escape, please assist her.”

“I will”

#mcu loki #loki of asgard #loki laufeyson #loki mcu #loki au #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #loki god of mischief #loki marvel #loki x oc

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thefandangos · 5 months

Text

I've been mulling over the thought of a new legacy style challenge to do now that For Rent has released (in addition to my premades gameplay). So I jotted down a few notes and before I knew it, a legacy was born.

I wanted something with a bit of randomness in it and so this wheel when spun, will decide which generation will be played in which order.

Spin once before creating your founder, then spin again when your legacy heirs are pregnant with their firstborns or deciding to start a family. You may wish to use the generation colours as name inspiration or names inspired by the generation theme. Reroll any previously played generations, or copy and edit the wheel to remove them as you progress.

Only one mandatory trait per generation, the others can be randomised or chosen. But all children of that generation must have the mandatory trait, not just the heir. I mean, you never know when you might lose an heir, right?

Your founder sim may start with the full 20,000 simoleons and buy or rent their first home. Outside of the mandatory trait and allowed aspirations for the rolled generation, they can be entirely of your own creation. The legacy family are not confined to one lot, they may move to any neighbourhood that makes sense for the story you are playing. You can keep other family members on the lot, or not, as you wish.

RED - Generation Love

Romantically minded since your teen years, you feel incomplete without another sim on your arm, whether that is your Mr/Ms Right or your Mr/Ms Right Now!

Aspirations - Serial Romantic, Soulmate, Villainous Valentine

Trait - Romantic

Career - Either one of the GTW careers or the WFM careers. No rabbit holes for you.

Goals

Follow your sim to work every day or work from home

Attend every Romance Festival from when your sim is a teen and onwards

Leave at least one sim at the altar

Complete the message in a bottle collection

Woohoo in all possible locations (animal shed, boardwalk ride, photo booth, observatory, sauna, hot tub, bed, tent, shower, waterfall, closet, pile of leaves, sleeping pod, coffin, party bush, Brindleton Bay Lighthouse, Rocketship, Money Vault, Dumpster, hot spring, ice cave, treehouse)

Either lose your soulmate early in life (to death or affair) which turns you into a Serial Romantic or Villainous Valentine, or sow your wild oats in your teen and young adult days before finding your soulmate as an adult/elder.

Have at least one unplanned child via risky woohoo (MCCC) and fight for primary custody if the baby is not born within your household.

Create a paternity test situation if using the paternity module from lumpinou’s RPO mod

Incur Agnes Crumplebottom’s wrath at least once

VERMILLION - Generation Create

You yearn to create something extraordinary and live the kind of bohemian lifestyle you've always dreamt of.

Aspirations - Painter Extraordinaire, Musical Genius, Bestselling Author, Master Actor, Master Maker, Lord of the Knits

Trait - Creative

Career - You can make your money from any creative pursuits, career or freelance.

Goals

Complete Artistic Prodigy, Creative Genius or Slumber Party Animal child aspiration

Complete the Holiday Crackers and Decorative Eggs collection

Set up a stall as either the Flea Market or at a Community Space (or sell online on Plopsy) to sell your wares

Hang out at Thrifttea regularly throughout your teens, attend at least one Fashion Show, Amateur Comedy Night or Poetry evening

Marry another creative sim

Have three children over the course of your life

If completed Bestselling Author aspiration, write a Book of Life and bring someone back from the dead

If completing the Musical Genius aspiration, get to lvl8 in handiness and craft your musical instrument on the woodworking table

Max three of the following traits: handiness, painting, violin, guitar, piano, pipe organ, DJ mixing, singing, knitting, cross-stitch, juice fizzing, fabrication, acting, writing, photography, nectar making

Create a creative club (book club, life drawing club, punk band, improv club etc) and hold weekly meetings

Let one of your kids’ friends move in

ORANGE - Generation Food

Food and drink are your raison d'etre.

Aspirations - Master Chef, Master Mixologist, Expert Nectar Maker, Appliance Wiz

Trait - Foodie

Career - Food Critic, Culinary, own your own restaurant or food stall, maybe even an online cookery vlogger. If it’s food and drink related, you can do it.

Goals

Work as a Fast Food Employee or Barista as a teen

Complete the Experimental Food Photos collection

Win the Spice Curry Challenge at the Spice Festival

Marry a sim who works in a restaurant you have visited, or a food stall you’ve frequented, or who is in someway connected to the food industry (pizza/grocery delivery person or food critic all count)

Unlock and complete the Grilled Cheese Aspiration

Max at least three of the following: Baking, Cooking, Gourmet Cooking, Nectar Making, Mixology, Juice Fizzing

Quit your career as you become an adult and open your own food or drink related business (or if you already owned your own business, sell it and get a new food related job)

Kill someone with Pufferfish Nigiri (on purpose or by accident)

AMBER - Generation Travel

You have been bitten by the wanderlust bug and spent most of your childhood dreaming of all the simlands you wanted to visit. Now that you are older, you just can’t seem to stay in one place.

Aspirations - City Native, Beach Life, Mt Komorebi Sightseer, Fount of Tomerani Knowledge, Jungle Explorer,

Trait - Dance Machine + (optional) Child of the Islands

Career - Freelance or Part time jobs only or errands and odd jobs to make money. For example, a freelance travel photographer would be a great idea.

Goals

Marry a sim you meet on your travels in a destination wedding

Complete all the above aspirations

Retire to your favourite travel destination

Complete Buried Treasure, Seashells, Omiscan Treasures, Ancient Omiscan Artifacts, Snow Globes, Posters collections

Live in each sim world for at least two days each and visit both vacation worlds before you retire.

If you have Child of the Islands, perform the summon Island Elementals, befriend one, invite them to move in and have a child with them for the sulani mana inherited trait

Max Photography and have a collection of photos, one from each world

Visit Sylvan Glade and the Forgotten Grotto

YELLOW - Generation Animal

You can’t resist making friends with all animals everywhere and in fact, you prefer them to other sims. Your love for animals was ignited the day that your parent bought you your first pet.

Aspirations - Friend of the Animals, Country Caretaker, Championship Rider

Trait - Animal Enthusiast (or Dog Lover/Cat Lover/Horse Lover/Rancher if they are more appropriate to the storyline)

Career - Own either a farm, ranch or a veterinary clinic

Goals

Own a Hamster, Rat, Pygmy Hedgehog or Bubalus as a child

Make friends with the monster under the bed

Always have at least one animal in the house from child age upwards

Complete Village Fair ribbons collection, if your sim owns their own farm, alternatively win at the Finchwick Fair

Complete the Feathers collection

If on a farm play with the simple living lot trait

Have only one child because you are more interested in your animals (other risky woohoo offspring are also ok)

Have higher relationships with your animals than the sims in your life

Have your spouse leave you/cheat on you because they feel neglected and immediately adopt three cats

Create an evil chicken and a golden chicken

CHARTREUSE - Generation Nature

You find an overwhelming sense of peace in the great outdoors and could never stomach an indoor job.

Aspirations - Freelance Botanist, The Curator, Angling Ace, Outdoor Enthusiast, Eco Inovator

Trait - Loves Outdoors

Career - Civil Designer, Conservationist, Gardener,

Goals

Become a scout as a child and teen

Befriend birds or rabbits

Romance the Hermit from Granite Falls

Become a Plant Sim temporarily

Complete frog, fossils, fish, insects collections

Take a vacation every summer in Granite Falls

Max flower arranging and kill an elder sim with a death scented bouquet

Have an outdoor wedding and marry someone you met in Granite Falls

Max herbalism skill

Use Elixir of Fertility before trying for a baby

GREEN - Generation Wealth

Money is what excites you - earning it, spending it, keeping it in vaults safe from other sims are all hobbies you enjoy immensely.

Aspirations - Fabulously Wealthy, Mansion Baron, Market Magnate, Five Star Property Owner

Trait - Materialistic

Career - Business, Criminal, Tech Guru, Salaryperson, Military, Own a retail business

Goals

Work two part time jobs as a teen

Marry an elder, rich sim

Have a butler

Complete the Simmies collection

Conceive all your children in a money vault

Invest in property that you rent out

Build a community lot for every child you have and name it after them

Donate to charity weekly

Have at least one divorce

Start a Super Secret Rich Club for Rich Sims (simBilderberg, s’illuminati, the Sims Templar, the Freesims, the Rosimcrucians) and build them a super secret Bohemian Grove community lot.

TEAL - Generation Family

You’ll never be happier than when you are surrounded by family. Parents, children, spouse are all doted upon equally.

Aspirations - Successful Lineage, Big Happy Family, Vampire Family, Super Parent,

Trait - Family-Orientated

Career - Any (Education, Law for example)

Goals

Complete Voidcritters collection

Work as a babysitter as a teen

Marry your childhood sweetheart

Have either twins or triplets

Always attend the Festival of Youth

Adopt a sim

Volunteer as a family every weekend

Have a family reunion social event once a season

Renew your vows as elders to celebrate your ridiculously long marriage

Win a Karaoke Contest

BLUE - Generation Body

Your body is a temple and that’s why you leave the boots on the outside. Alongside your wish for bodily perfection you have always cultivated a keen interest in space. The rigors that the body must endure to cope with space travel, as well as alien physiology, fascinate you.

Aspirations - Bodybuilder, Extreme Sports Enthusiast

Trait - Active

Career - Astronaut, Athlete, Secret Agent, Military

Goals

Complete Rambunctious Scamp, Mind and Body or Playtime Captain child aspiration

Learn to ride a bike as a child

Attend either Cheer, Football or Soccer Club as a teen

Max out the rocket science skill - who said athletes were stupid huh?

Build yourself a garden rocket

Marry an alien

Conceive all of your children in space

Complete the alien, space print and space rock collections

Workout every day and max the fitness skill

Start a jogging/power walking club and meet weekly

Complete the fire challenge on the climbing wall without getting burnt

Go Rock Climbing, Skiing and Snowboarding at least once

Visit Sixam

VIOLET - Generation Friend

You want to be everyone’s friend and whether you are the life and soul of the party, the kindest, sweetest soul or just the sim who is scared of being alone, people tend to flock to you.

Aspirations - Joke Star, Party Animal, Friend of the World, Neighbourhood Confidante, Leader of the Pack, Good Vampire, Discerning Dweller

Trait - Outgoing or Cheerful

Career - Any (Politician, Athlete, Business, Police or any other charisma based careers)

Goals

Complete the Social Butterfly or Slumber Party or Playtime Captain child aspiration

Make a childhood best friend who must stay a best friend throughout your life

Join the Cheer team as a teen or have a Lifeguard part time job.

Complete the Postcards collection

Never live alone

Romance the Statue Busker

Marry one of your best friends

Throw one of every party type that is possible on the lot you live on

Throw a social event weekly

Have more than three children

PURPLE - Generation Paranormal

Growing up you always had a vague feeling in the back of your mind that the world held secrets from you. And now you are older, you are determined to find out what they are!

Aspirations - Purveyor of Potions, Vampire Family, Master Vampire, Spellcraft & Sorcery, Strangerville Mystery, Good Vampire, Werewolf Initiative, Celebrity Psychic(custom career by adeepindigo), Master of Mysticism (custom career by adeepindigo)

Trait - Pick one from Paranoid/Erratic/Geek/Loner/Nosy

Career - Freelance Paranormal Investigator, Fortune Teller or Mystic(spellcaster only), Military

Goals

Move into a haunted house or apartment, or make your house haunted

Solve the Strangerville Mystery

Marry an occult sim

Have an occult baby

(optional) Become an occult sim yourself

Befriend a vampire, alien, werewolf, mermaid, spellcaster, ghost and the Grim Reaper

Complete Moonwood Relics, Magical Artifacts, Sugar Skulls collection

Summon Bonehilda

If a werewolf, find and marry your fated mate and have a dormant wolf or greater wolf blood child

Start a Council of Occult sims

MAGENTA - Generation Deviance

Is there something inside you that is broken? Or are the other sims just soft, weak losers? You delight in subverting expectations and going your own way. You can’t seem to help hurting others or poking your nose in where it isn’t wanted. Will you get your comeuppance?

Aspirations - Public Enemy, Chief of Mischief, Villainous Valentine, Seeker of Secrets

Trait - Evil or Kleptomaniac or Mean. Pick at least one.

Career - Police and Criminal

Goals

Complete Live Fast teen aspiration

Complete the MySims collection

Start your career in the Police

Romance and marry your boss

Fall in love with a criminal, divorce your spouse and marry the criminal

After the wedding, quit the police force and join the criminal career

Attend the Humour and Hijinks Festival and win for the Pranksters

Have a lifelong nemesis and get that sim eaten by a cowplant

Start a bowling team and bowl weekly

WHITE - Generation Health

Early on in life you realise the need for a calm mindset despite it not always coming easily to you. You prioritise a holistic approach to health and feel that mind and body are equally important to sim well being. You are especially motivated to share this revelation with other sims you meet.

Aspirations - Inner Peace, Self-care Specialist, Zen Guru

Trait - High Maintenance or Vegetarian

Career - Doctor or run your own spa/yoga studio

Goals

Complete Rambunctious Scamp, Mind and Body or Playtime Captain child aspiration

Complete the Gardening collection

Have a Father Winter baby

Have a Lighthouse baby

Meet the Tragic Clown and woo them by wearing a tragic clown outfit to cheer them up. You must marry wearing matching tragic clown outfits, photos are mandatory. You can then both change out of clown clothing for the remainder of your lives should you wish to

Make a stockpile of jam for future generations

Become a yoga instructor and hold weekly classes

Meditate daily

Max the wellness skill

BLACK - Generation Brain

The pursuit of knowledge is all important to you, whatever your chosen field and you are certain that no life can be well lived unless you graduate from university and continue to learn throughout life.

Aspirations - Renaissance Sim, Nerd Brain, Computer Whiz, Master Vampire, Archeology Scholar, Spellcraft and Sorcery, Academic

Trait - Genius

Career - Scientist, Tech Guru, Engineer, Law,

Goals

Complete Whiz Kid or Mind and Body child aspiration

Complete Goal Orientated teen aspiration

Must attend Chess Club or Computer Club as a teen

Must go to University

Marry a fellow university student

Max Robotics and make a servo

Have a science baby

Get abducted by aliens

Complete geode and microscope collections

Always help your children with homework and school projects

Visit Sixam, if working as a scientist

GOLD - Generation Fame

You just know that one day, you are going to become a star, winning awards and adored by everyone you meet.

Aspirations - World Famous Celebrity

Trait - Self Absorbed or Ambitious or Overachiever

Career - Provided it gives you fame, you can do it for money! (Athlete, Entertainer, Freelance, Painter, Style Influencer, Tech Guru, Social Media, Actor)

Goals

Must attend drama club as a child and teen

Complete Drama Llama or Admired Icon teen aspiration

Can only marry another celebrity

Have one celebrity baby

Be involved in a celebrity scandal/drama

Win a Starlight Accolade

Complete Crystals, Metals and Elements collections

Create and sell a trend on Trendi

Start an exclusive celebrity club focused around a hobby of your choosing

You can do as many, or as few generations as you want just so long as you let the Wheel of Fate decide each and every time!

#simblr #ts4 #sims 4 simblr #sims 4 challenge #sims 4 legacy

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spicywhumper · 2 months

Text

@femslash-february bingo 2024 (dark edition): enemies to lovers

series: untitles // rating: mature

trigger/content warnigs: blood, temporary captiviy, mental health issues, mentioned blood & violence, arranged marriage, implied child abuse. whatever the fuck you call "forcing your daughter to pose as your son so you don't lose the throne".

01 – Destiny

There’s fate, there’s destiny, and there are people meant to hate each other; people who meet across the battlefield but can’t bring themselves to draw the other’s blood.

02 – Royal

In a world built by men, first-born daughters don’t have the same rights of the firstborn son; sometimes she forgets her name’s the one carved in a tombstone, and that the reason she suffocates all the time is because if she’s not Krystian, than she’s nobody – and being nobody us dangerous when you do have a womb.

03 – Forest

The witch was collecting herbs in a cold winter morning when she found the bundle, impossibly, impossibly small, and a baby that somehow survived the night that kills even the strongest men.

04 – Protection

It’s annoying, how he father will forget she’s a princess for everything but his insistence that she needs protection, a knight to be around her all the time; her, Prince Krystian, the best soldier that came out of the Royal training in years.

05 – Silver

Prince Krystian shouldn’t be here, it’s what her commander says, he’s the Crown Prince and he’s the second most important person of his kingdom. And he’s her prey as soon as the commander orders.

06 – Dark

Krystian is mildly surprised that the barbaric enemies of her kingdom allow women in their ranks, but judging by her tall and broad the one attacking her is, it’s probably because she can easily go toe-to-toe with the order tall and larger savage; she’s, luckily, the average size of her people’s male soldier, still easily defeated by the behemoth.

07 – Eyes

Krystian pretends she’s not mesmerized by silver eyes, moonlight eyes, definitely not human eyes.

08 – Compression

Her routine is to spend her day with her chest bind with tightly wrapping, hide in her quarters or private tent and take it off so she can breath; in the forth day of captivity, she’s lightheaded all the time and probably with some damaged ribs.

09 – Purple

Savina’s more worried by the purple and black on the Prince’s soldiers chest than with how that’s definitely not your regular male chest.

10 – Silence

“Will you say anything,” she asks, exhausted, her chest and back hurting even if now she’s free from the bindings for the night. The savage in front of her, the one who gave her a shirt of hers that is large enough to hid most of the bulge just gives her water and a bow of broth.

11 – Secret

She frowns at the way the savage lies without even looking like she’s lying, telling her commander that the only reason she gave the prince one of her shirts is because he’s injured (Krystian pretend she doesn’t want to hug her as a thank you).

12 – Sharp

It’s a full moon, she notices how the savage is restless, how fast she eats and how she looks jumpy, weird; the commander enters their tent, she bares her teeth at him, sharp fangs – mo than one set of canines, eyes shining brighter than ever; all he does is roll his eyes and tell her “please do not eat the prince”.

13 – Blood

“Why,” she asks one night, “because my father needed an heir”; because they’d make him sell me as soon as I bled, because it’s being his son or being a breeding stock.

14 – Water

The savage, Krystian won’t go a low as call her “Savina” or whatever. Guard the body of water as Krystian takes her bath; because I won’t let any of you see royal goods, she tells the men and women of her brigade, half of the men grunt, the men made disgusted noises.

15 – Cold

Savina watches the prince – the princess? – shiver, teeth clattering, and covers her with her own warmed blanket;.

16 – Touch

Krystian doesn’t know how it escaped from borrowing a blanket to standing close to curling up on Savina’s arms, but she’s not complaining when she has a warm touch to stop her from freezing to death.

17 – Joke

The savages joke about how Savina must be riding the princes dick for him to get this attached to her, Krystian is disgusted by the blatant show of “a woman needs to be fucking a guy to be his friend”; Savina rolls her eyes and tasks him if that’s how he got into the position of member of this brigade

18 – Armor

Krystian’s shoulders are broad, well-sculpted, and she has been wearing a rather heavy armor since she was eleven – since her body started to reshape itself in a form too feminine for a prince; she’s so used to layers of thick leather and metal that it’s weird to feel safe without them.

19 – Predator

Savina’s a predator by nature, Krystian has been sure of that since she saw her coming towards he in the battlefield; she’s not ready to watch a wolf take place of her and bring a large buck to fed the brigade.

20 – Share

Krystian shares how the pressure of being the heir makes her feel small (how she’s desperate because how the fuck she’ll get her own heirs?); Savina shares sweet nothing, comforting words and keeps her own burden a secret – Krystian doesn’t like the feeling that it’s because it’ll hurt her.

21 – Sweet

Turns out that the enemy that was supposed to kill the Crown Prince brings her little candies, the woman turns into a giant wolf and is still the sweetest person she has ever met.

22 – Venom

In hindsight, Krystian finds it almost ironic that turns out Savina is the one holding her when the venom wrecks havoc on her body and changes her so deeply that she feels like a dead woman walking.

23 – Pink

Savina’s lips are pink, and soft, and warm, and everything Krystian shouldn’t be addicted to.

24 – Moon

Under the moon, all Krystian can think of is how she managed to get capture and fall in love with one of them; the answer, she think, is that it’s because they’re just in opposite sides, the devil is decided by who wins.

25 – Hold

Savina doesn’t think she can get used to the way Krystian curls up and relaxes on her hold, the so feared prince is just someone that hasn’t been held since she was a baby.

26 – Sword

The tip’s painted red, coming out of her chest, the wielder is dead before Savina’s knees touch the ground.

27 – Lonely

There’s something lonely about being a Prince, there’s something lonely about being a wolf without a pack – finding each other seems to fix it; (then there’s something lonely about not being allowed to die).

28 – Marriage

The issue with this marriage, Krystian thinks, isn’t that her wife is a bad person, not even that she still doesn’t know how to tell her “you see, Myrian… I’m not a male and I do not have the needed parts to get you pregnant”; is that apparently Krystian’s not the only one easily charmed by Savina.

29 – Flesh

Warm and tender, under her fingers and under her mouth, Savina decides to not think about how delicate it is; she pretends she doesn’t know how sweet human flesh tastes (but she thinks Krystian knows what she has done before, and somehow still trusts her with her very human, very breakable body.)

30 – Mark

Krystian offers to watch over Savina during baths, as a thank you, the soldiers frown but don’t mind it when Savina says “I trust the prince”, she takes a sneak peak; Savina’s all muscles and smooth skin, and marks down her back that Krystian doesn’t want to think about what it means.

31 – Noise

The forest sounds are soothing, calm, Krystian misses them when she comes back to the castle – she learns in a few days that the noises of her home are too much for Savina, the other guards side-eye them when she lets the woman sleep on her quarters; she doesn’t think they need ot deal with a distressed werewolf.

32 – Glint

Many things glint: her eyes, her sharp canines, her chin when she lifts her head from her apparent favorite spot between Krystian’s thighs.

33 – Tears

When her father dies, she wonders why half of her tears feel fake; when Savina and Myrian hold her at night, she wonders why the tears felt more like relief than grief.

34 – Bird

“A little bird told me you’ve been eying my bodyguard,” Myrian just stares at her and smirks; a little bird also told her that better a bodyguard that can’t give the Royal Family bastard heirs than any other member of the Kingsmen.

35 – Father

Krystian’s supposed to Father a dozen children, the court says, since ‘he’s’ the only heir of the royal family, she wants to ask them if they can make her fingers suddenly able to impregnate women (Savina laughs at her face, pulls her closer and pats her head like she’s trying to mollify a dog – it works).

36 – Smile

They have different smiles: Savina’s a predators barely in disguise and Myrian a wolf in sheep’s skin; Krystian loves both equally, and also fears them because she’s not stupid.

37 – Devil

The man cries “devil!” when Savina’s teeth sink into his throat, she doesn’t care, not when he was trying to break into Myrian’s room, expecting Savina to have followed Krystian in a trip; Myrian laughs maniacally until she’s sobbing when it hits her.

38 – Night

Krystian lies that she has “tried to secure an heir” after every night of “genuine attempts at keeping my bloodline alive”; it’s pretty funny that they don’t find the silence suspicious.

39 – Seasons

Days pass, weeks and years, seasons change and Krystian keeps doing her best to visit both of the graves; she finds them again, again and again, different faces and different names; but she always comes back to where there’s nothing but bones turned to dust and smooth gravestones.

40 – Grab

The baby boy grabs her finger, he doesn’t seem scared that a stranger with blood-red eyes visits him at night; she wonders if that’s the good ending, that this version of Myrian is happier than the ones that came before.

41 – Summon

“I can’t fix your curse,” the demon’s blacker than black, “I can’t save you from your love.”

42 – Miss

When Krystian’s away from home, before she does befriend Savina, she misses something she never had; in hindsight, she thinks maybe her soul had been tethered to Savina’s since they were forged deep in the pit of the underworld.

43 – Spite

For the first few years, she survived out of spite – for her father, for the usurper, for the bloodsucker that bit her, and for how something greater than her cursed her like that.

44 – Spirit

“What do you see? When you look in the mirror,” the spirit, the hallucination asks, the mockery of a mx between Savina and Myrian, nothing, vampire’s don’t have reflections.

45 – Talk

The first time she takes time to talk to Myrian, she think it’s when she’s doomed to love her for the rest of her life (unaware of how long that is).

46 – Past

Savina doesn’t tell her about her past, but whispers to Myrian and she pretends she didn’t listen (and she pretends it doesn’t hurt that Savina trusts Myrian more than her.)

47 – Fever

Maybe she should have known she loved Savina right then, after the weeks of torture as the wolf fought to survive the poison, when she only could breath again when the fever broke.

48 – Double

There’s much more than double the pain when you loose two soulmates.

49 – Plan

When she meets Harlow, she doesn’t see the spark, the silver or the golden, she only sees normal human eyes; so her plan is to settle down with this human that doesn’t host the souls of people she has loved for centuries.

50 – Fairytale

It’s almost a fairytale, her story – meeting one in a battlefield, meeting the other under the duty of a Crown Prince, and never being free of them.

#femslash feb bingo #enemies to lovers #fifty sentences fic #femslash #whump #whump community #whump blog #whumpblr #lady whump #check the tw list hm

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purlturtle · 7 days

Note

7, 5 and 9 for the WIP asks!

Oooooh thank you for asking! Can't wait for #5 specifically!! (from this list)

7. How do you choose which POV to write from?

Most often, it's by vibe alone! 😅 I've only recently started to think about stories more purposely, to ponder which scene I want to be in whose POV for maximum impact (or which scene needs to be in someone's POV because of being there and information flow and all that). That's new to me, and a lot of fun - making writing feel more crafty, if you know what I mean! I love that!

5. Do you like constructive criticism?

I would love, kiss, sell my eldest child I do not have for constructive criticism! Emphasis on the constructive: if feedback is given with the intention to make a thing better, I will always listen! We (the feedback giver and me) might not agree what "better" is, but it's always an opportunity for me to take a step back, look at my handiwork with fresh eyes, and improve on it. Plus, I've never had a creative writing class to burn me on con crit, and also I would love to hear how someone with a good eye for writing and editing and all that sees my stories. Getting comments from readers is already great, but craftsperson to craftsperson would make me swoon, faint, love kiss sell my firstborn etc. etc.

9. Do you comment on stories you read?

I do my best to do so, yes. I don't always succeed - sometimes I read as a distraction from feeling shitty, and that means I don't always have the spoons to do more than click kudos. But when I'm in a better frame of mind reading, I try to! I know how wonderful it feels to get comments, and I want to give other authors that feeling too!

Thank you for these questions; they were great!!

#ask meme answered

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kelyon · 1 year

Text

Dark Mistress 29: Contention

Belle tries really hard to be normal.

Read on AO3

“Are you really going to leave Gideon alone with her?”

The noise of the argument outside pummeled into the walls of the cottage. From Rumpelstiltskin’s bed, Belle held their child in her arms and listened to the raised voices. It was impressive how Baelfire could infuse a single word--her--with so much hate and vitriol.

“Would you rather keep him out in the cold all day?” Rumpelstiltskin countered his son with rapidly-thinning patience. “More than that, he’ll need to eat before the day is done.”

Belle looked down at Gideon, who was contentedly sucking on a rag. Over the past few days, she had gotten pretty good at feeding him sheep milk. It wasn’t the same as the real thing, but it was all she had to give. He didn’t seem to mind.

Outside, the boy was still protesting. “Tabat can--”

“Tabat has her own children and her own life to live. We don’t need to rely on her to care for Gideon when his own mother--”

With pounding steps, Balefire stormed away from his father. He tended to do that when he didn’t have an answer--or when the answer he had was too cruel to speak aloud. He burst into the cottage, barely glaring at Belle before he picked up another load of goods that they were going to take to the market.

“Why do you have to come along, anyway?” He started up again. “You know I can sell on my own. I’ve been doing it all summer.”

“Yes, and you deserve a rest. And I have my own errands to run. Believe it or not, I do want people in town to know I’m still alive.”

“Are you going to take your staff and walk with a limp you don’t have anymore?” The boy spat. “Are we going to tell people that Gideon is with his ‘mother’? After I told everyone she was dead?”

“You what?”

“Well, she was when I said it!”

In the privacy of the cottage, Belle chuckled. She could imagine Rumple’s expression of speechless bafflement. It was an absurd situation--a mother who had never been pregnant, who had died and then reappeared a few days later. Even if they wanted to be honest, how could any of them explain all this to ordinary people?

It was a part of life she had forgotten, caring about ‘people’ and what they thought. For so long, she’d been alone. The only individuals she’d spoken to were those she’d wanted to be afraid of her. People who knew what the Dark One was capable of and had specifically called upon her presence in their lives. People who were willing to pay the price of seeing her. It had been a long time since Belle had tried to keep her darkness a secret. Now this boy wanted to present a normal life to his community, despite Belle’s entirely abnormal presence.

No wonder he was angry.

The argument in the yard went on for a while longer. Their voices lowered to the point where Belle couldn’t hear if they had come to an agreement or had given up trying.

Before they left for the market, Rumpelstiltskin came back into the cottage. He was still shaking his head at the audacity of his firstborn. But when he looked at her, her and Gideon, his eyes went warm. All his troubles melted away.

“Hey,” he said softly. “Is there anything you need before we leave?”

“I don’t think so,” Belle said. She made a point to look at the bowl of warmed sheep milk, Gideon’s reed basket, a pile of fresh rags and cloths, and a bowl of broth larger than she would be able to eat in two days. He followed her gaze as she counted all the ways he cared for them. “Everything is within reach. And I might even muster up the strength to get out of bed and fetch something if I need it.”

That last was meant as a joke, but Rumpelstiltskin only looked more worried. “Don’t strain yourself, sweetheart. Please.”

She reached for his hand. “I won’t, Rumple. I promise. Gideon and I will enjoy another day of rest and quiet contemplation.”

He bent down and kissed her forehead. Then he kissed her lips. “Be safe, my love,” he whispered. “We’ll be back before sundown.”

“We’ll be right here.”

****

True to her word, Belle stayed in bed most of the day. She’d seldom left it since she had first come to Rumple’s cottage. The journey back from death had reduced her to that. Magic was out of the question for the moment. All the power she possessed was focused on keeping her alive and moderately sane. Even a simple spell would deplete her and make her convalescence last that much longer. She wanted to be well, so she forced herself to rest.

For the first time in more than a hundred years, she needed to sleep and eat like a mortal human. Most of her days were spent in sleep. Her most strenuous task was to sit up in bed, to hold her child and talk to her lover. Often, she would manage a restful doze, half-awake while the busyness of the farm went on around her. She measured her hours in the noises of sheep and chickens, of the barking of the dog or the cooking of food, the whir of Rumple at his spinning wheel.

The fights between Rumpelstiltskin and his son.

The boy didn’t like her. He didn’t want her in their lives. She couldn’t blame him. Night after night, father and son would argue over the dinner table while she had only the strength to close her eyes and listen. More often than not, she found herself agreeing with Baelfire’s points over Rumpelstiltskin’s.

Her Rumple was so full of love it threatened to blind him. From their first acquaintance, he had sworn himself over to her, and that loyalty had never faltered. He was the same way with his children. He loved them to the point of madness. He would give the marrow from his bones if it meant they would have a happier life. To him, the people he loved were parts of himself--which made it impossible for him to see them as flawed individuals. That was why it hurt him so much when people abandoned him, like she had. It was why it hurt him when his oldest son disagreed with him, especially about her.

Baelfire was able to keep a clear perspective about people, whether he loved them or not. He was certainly mindful of his father’s weaknesses, and he never forgot the force of evil Rumpelstiltskin had invited into their home. The boy looked at Belle like she was a wild animal Rumple was trying to convince him would make a good pet. An animal he had to live with, but could never let his guard down around.

He was right. She was dangerous. Belle wouldn’t trust the Dark One with a child she loved. On her first day here, she had given Rumple her dagger and secured his promise that he would stop her if she became a threat to his children. If it weren’t for that, she would never have allowed herself to stay with them.

If she hadn’t given Rumple the dagger, she would have had to go back to the hell of her old existence.

Now, in the warmth and the comfort of Rumple’s cottage, the thought of returning to the palace of ashes filled Belle’s heart with dread. For so many years, she had buried herself in the site of her greatest evil. She had deadened herself, had become one with the dead, in order to allow life to flourish in her absence. It had been the most she could do to mitigate the Dark One’s potential for destruction.

Rumple believed she could be better than that. He wanted her to live, wanted her life to join with his. He wanted her to see their son growing up. He thought they would all be better off for her presence. He believed in it so much, it made her want to believe it too.

Could it be true? Could she ever, really, be good? Could she be a part of life and not just a spectator, condemned to the darkness on the fringes? Baelfire didn’t seem to think so. He treated her like she was poison. He took for granted that even if her intentions were good, the Dark One could never be a natural creature, only a supernatural force of evil.

That may be true, but Belle couldn’t act like it was. She couldn’t let herself be deadened again. Not while Rumpelstiltskin and Gideon drew breath. Rumple who loved her beyond reason, Gideon who had no choice but to trust her. They tethered her to the world of light and life. She loved them for it with all her blackened heart.

Drawing her knees up to her chest, she rested her child against her thighs so they were face to face. He was so beautiful. Not aesthetically--with his bald, oblong head and his gaping, toothless mouth and the cloths that needed to be changed soon--but the fact of him was beautiful, as every baby was beautiful. Gideon had the beauty of springtime, of seeds and sunshine and trees beginning to bud. In her old life, she had once heard one of her aunts say that babies were life renewing itself. Rumpelstiltskin called it a miracle.

It was.

And he had come from her. This perfect miracle had been born from the union of the Dark One and a poor spinner. True, Belle hadn’t carried her son in her body, but she had been a part of his conception and his birth. He had come from her, and she was a part of him. That would be true for as long as he lived. It was as close to immortality as most humans ever got, knowing that their descendants would live on and create new generations.

Belle held Gideon by the hands to spread out his tiny arms. She sighed. “I might outlive you, you know. I might see you grow old and frail while I stay the same as I was when I first took this curse.”

She had been so young then, so young and so determined. Her people were dying, she would pay any price to save them. At the time, she had thought dying was the worst thing that could happen to a person. She would have given her life, if that was what Zoso had demanded. But the true price was so much higher.

Her life had stopped that night, replaced by a hundred years of tortured existence. She only began to live again when she met Rumpelstiltskin and his sons. Her more literal return from death seemed paltry, compared to the life they had given to her. They had saved her, all three of them.

She brought her baby close to her, let him nuzzle in the crook of her neck.

“I love you, Gideon,” she whispered.

Then she kissed his head.

She waited, but nothing happened. Just like nothing happened every time she kissed Rumpelstiltskin.

Her eyes burned, and she wiped away the tears. They left a streak of blackness on her bone-white palms. Bae really was right about her. She couldn’t love truly, and she would never truly belong here.

“But I can’t leave either,” she said to Gideon. She held him up by the armpits, his legs kicking at the air. He was too young to smile, but his sweet blue eyes focused on her face. “As long as you don’t mind having a monster for a mother, I’ll stay. I promise.”

She brought him close again. She held on and didn’t let go.

“True love or not, I’ll always be yours.”

****

She woke when she heard the dog barking. A swell of pride went through her when she recognized the sound. She’d been here less than a week and she already knew Baguette’s “Bae’s home” bark. For a warm and glowing instant, she felt like she belonged. Like this was her home. Like she was an ordinary woman looking forward to the return of her menfolk.

Then she heard a baby crying.

Her head darted to look over at Gideon--asleep in his basket. The crying had come from outside. There were other voices too, and none belonged to Rumple or Baelfire. Most of them were high-pitched, some chattering, some shouting. There was a squeal--she was certain it was a cry of pain, until she heard laughter. And another voice, low but feminine, chiding the others for misbehaving.

Oh.

The voices were children. Their mother was with them. As they got closer to the cottage, Belle heard a young girl join in on the yelling. Then a man’s voice--not Rumple’s--boomed out some comment on the fineness of the farm. He wasn’t shouting, his voice wasn’t angry, but he was louder than he should have been to talk to people who were walking with him.

Finally, Rumple’s voice rose over the throng. He was close to the cottage. “I’ll go see if she’s feeling well enough to have visitors.”

He opened the door quickly and shut it behind him. He carried his old staff in his hand, like he had been walking with it. He looked at her with wide eyes.

“I am so sorry.”

“What’s going on?” Belle asked. “Who are those people?”

“Bae’s intended,” he explained. “Her family met us at the market, and decided they were coming home with us. The wife, Tabat, she wants to see Gideon. And you.”

“Me?” Belle barely kept herself from shrieking. “Does she know who I am?”

“Of course not!” Rumple hissed. “Only that you’re Gideon’s mother.”

Before either of them could say more, the door opened. A ruddy-faced woman poked her head into the cottage.

“Hello!” she called with a well-meaning cheeriness that seemed calculated to outweigh her rudeness. “How are things in here?”

The magic came to her instantly, on an instinct. Belle’s only choice was how to direct it. Should she vanish? Should she curse this strange woman with blindness? Should she burn the whole village to the ground?

No.

Belle focused her power to herself. To her skin and her eyes and her teeth and her hair. She was dressed, most of her body was covered. She only needed to change her face and hands. She could do this.

As quickly as other women could put on a smile, Belle put on the face of a human. By the time the woman’s eyes adjusted to the dimness of the cottage, everything looked perfectly normal.

“Oh, look at him!” The woman brushed past Rumple to pick Gideon up out of his basket. “He’s already gotten bigger!” Then she turned and greeted Belle with a warm smile. “Hello, dear, nice to meet you. I understand you’ve had a rough time of it.”

Belle opened her mouth, but no words came out. Rumple was no help, he could only stare at her changed body.

“Y-yes,” she managed at last. “I’m sure you know how it is, with… birthing.”

That was how small talk worked, wasn’t it? Trying to get people to talk about themselves so they wouldn’t ask questions about you?

The woman took the bait. “Oh yes, the first one is always the hardest. The next ones will come easier, believe you me!” She winked at her own insinuation.

Rumpelstiltskin blushed and stammered. “Tabat, I was--I was going to talk to Yahn outside so Belle could have some privacy.”

“Go ahead.” The woman sat down on the edge of the bed, made herself comfortable with Gideon in her arms. “I’m sure we have things to discuss that men won’t want to hear.”

She laughed, and Belle managed a weak smile. Rumple tried to protest, but the woman waved him out the door.

“It’s alright,” Belle called out to him. Her voice sounded strangely high. Was that the strain of the situation or had she forgotten what she used to sound like? Either way, she tried to believe her own words. “I’ll be fine, Rumple.”

“You’re sure, sweetheart?”

“Yes.”

With a grim nod, he closed the door and left them alone.

“It’s Belle, isn’t it?” Now that Rumple was gone, the woman’s voice softened. She seemed to be putting on less of a performance. Her bluster wasn’t genuine, but her concern was.

“Yes,” she answered. The true name of the Dark One had gone decades without being spoken by mortals. Now it was being bandied about freely by peasants. The fact gave Belle a perverse twinge of amusement.

“And I’m Tabat. My husband Yahn is the butcher in the village, and our Morraine has had her sights set on Baelfire since almost before they could talk.”

Unsure of what else to do, Belle looked down at hands. They seemed so small compared to her claws. So young and pink and pretty. “Rumple said his son had an intended.”

“Well, not officially,” Tabat said. “The men are only now finally talking terms. I don’t know how they do things where you come from, but here when it’s two young ones, the fathers will come to an agreement, and then there’s an announcement and usually a feast.”

“And after that they’re married?”

“No, no. Just properly promised. The wedding itself can wait a year or two. Especially now that the war’s over, children can have more time to be children.”

A shadow fell over Tabat when she spoke about the Ogre War. Belle didn’t need magic to know she’d been touched by it.

“Fourteen,” she remembered out loud. “They were taking children as soldiers at fourteen years old.”

Tabat tilted her head at Belle. “You know that? Are you from around here, then?”

“No,” she said quickly. She remembered the Duke of the Frontlands, a loathsome man who hid behind the walls of his castle and sent children out to die in his war. She remembered the sound of his blood gurgling after she’d ripped out his throat. “I met Rumpelstiltskin just before Baelfire’s fourteenth birthday.”

“That was a blessed day,” Tabat rocked Gideon back and forth. “The day the war ended.”

That had been the day the Dark One had made a deal with a helpless spinner. Belle had never imagined anyone would call it blessed. But it had been the end of an age of terror for these people. Belle had known their suffering, and with Rumple’s deal she had finally been able to end it. Maybe she had done something good after all.

“I lost my two oldest sons to that war.” Tabat spoke with the hollowness of a sorrow that should have healed long ago, but never would. “Yahn lost his hearing. Some nights my boy Toma still wakes up screaming. They took Morraine three days before it ended. Three days. You wouldn’t think that would be enough time for anything to happen, but it was weeks before I saw her smile again.” She took a deep breath, almost a sigh. As though merely speaking of her troubles was enough to ease them. “But she always smiles when her Baelfire is around. That’s why we want to keep him close.”

“He’s a good boy,” Belle said quietly. “He’ll be a good man. You probably know him better than I do, but I know he’s clever and he works hard. He loves his little brother.”

“Oh, but this one is easy to love!” Tabat smiled down at Gideon. “He’s such a little lamb. Has he given you any trouble yet?”

Belle shook her head. “Between Rumple and Baelfire, I barely have to do anything to care for him.”

“But you do.” Tabat nodded to the bowl of milk at Belle’s bedside. “Still with the sheep’s, then? Did your milk not come in at all?”

Belle pulled up the blanket to better cover her chest. The black liquid her breasts produced was nothing she would ever give to Gideon. “No,” she said. “I’ve been so ill, you see.”

“Of course.” Tabat raised her hand to press it against Belle’s forehead. “You do look frightfully pale.”

Pale? How pale? Belle tried to remember her human complexion. A lifetime indoors had left her with skin like ivory--was that what Tabat was seeing? Or was the magic starting to fade?

“Have you had any fever?” She kept up with questions that would be perfectly normal for a new mother, but to Belle seemed horribly invasive.

“No.” She sank into the pillow, away from the other woman’s touch. “No fever, I’ve just been weak.”

“And the bleeding?”

Belle blinked. “What bleeding?”

Tabat’s brow furrowed. “You know,” she tilted her head to Belle’s midsection. “The bleeding.”

“Oh!” Belle pretended to understand the after-effects of childbirth. “Yes, it’s fine. A--a normal amount, from what I can tell.”

It looked like Tabat was willing to accept Belle’s confusion as mere reluctance to discuss a delicate topic. Perhaps she understood how odd it would be to speak to a stranger about the condition of one’s body. What if Belle had been what she’d appeared? A young woman, who just gave birth to her first child and had almost died from it, who had no one to help her or advise her but the men in her life. Tabat was trying to help the person Belle pretended to be. They were strangers to each other, but at the same time they were intimately united--by motherhood, by loss, by simple human kindness.

Human.

A wave of longing overtook Belle. If only she could be free of her curse, she could be what Tabat took her for. She could be what Tabat was. Simple and wholesome. Not only living but a source of life. Perhaps she could help other people too. Belle could offer so much human kindness, if only she wasn’t tainted by darkness.

Tabat was still talking, imparting her wisdom as the mother of many children: “Some days the bleeding will be worse than others. If you move around a lot one day, you’ll want to rest the day after. If it smells really foul, or if there’s ever so much blood it frightens you, send that boy of yours over to me. I’ll see if we need to call up the midwife--or gods forbid a physician.”

“It would take a lot of blood to frighten me.” Belle gave a small chuckle, but Tabat shook her head.

“Childbed fever is no joke, dear,” she said. “You do seem to be on the mend, but there’s no knowing what might happen. Same with the little one. They’re sturdier than they look, but--”

Before she could finish, the door to the cottage slammed open. The noise of it woke Gideon, who immediately started crying. Belle winced at both sounds. A bright-eyed man stooped in through the door. When he stood up, he seemed to take up all the space in the cottage.

“Tabby!” he boomed. His arms were spread wide to Tabat. A wide smile filled his face. “I’ve some bad news. We’re losing our daughter!”

Tabat squealed. She fairly jumped up from the bed and ran to the man--with the wailing Gideon still tucked into the crook of one arm.

In the blink of an eye, the little room was full of noise, full of people. The gaggle of children poured in from outside--including Baelfire. A pretty girl in a blue dress clutched onto his arm, laughing and crying at the same time. Rumple was in the crowd as well. He had managed to take Gideon and was trying to soothe his cries while also celebrating with the rest of them. Belle shrank back in the bed, as though she could escape the chaos happening all around her.

She looked down at her hands--but saw that they were claws. No! The illusion was draining from her like water from a sieve. She snatched her claw under the blanket. Had it spread to her face yet? Should she pull the covers over her head like a child hiding from monsters? But she was the monster. If any of Bae’s new family saw her, they would know it instantly. Everything would be ruined for him.

Frantic, Belle looked around the excited party, trying to gauge if any of them had noticed her.

Only one set of eyes was fixed on her--Baelfire. The boy held his new betrothed while glaring at Belle with all the disgust and hatred in his heart.

I’m sorry, Belle mouthed to him. But apologies wouldn’t be enough. She had to make this right. She had to protect Bae’s future.

Belle took a deep breath, and summoned all the magic that was left in her. She’d be laid up for another week, but it would be worth the price.

The Dark One spoke: “Everybody go outside now!”

None of them heard her give the order. The spell was deeper than hearing or thinking. If anyone was asked what had happened, they would say that they just knew it was time to move the party outside. It was one of those group decisions that no one person ever made, but every single one of them obeyed.

No one looked at her as they left the cottage. Even Rumple, the last out, only lingered long enough to make sure the door was shut.

Belle collapsed and let the blackness take her.

****

When she awoke, it was dawn. Baelfire was standing over her bedside, his arms crossed over his chest. Belle looked around, but saw no signs of Rumple or Gideon.

“Where’s the baby?” she asked.

“My father has him,” the boy answered gruffly. “They’re with the sheep.”

“How long have I been asleep?”

“Just since last night,” he said. “Do you remember what you did?”

Belle sat up. She rubbed her hands over her face before she spoke. “Do you remember it? You weren’t supposed to know it happened.”

“I saw you speak. Then I saw everyone do exactly what you wanted. I did it too. I couldn’t not do it.”

Every word he said sounded like an accusation, like she had committed the most unholy of crimes.

Belle sighed. She was thirsty, but now was not the time to ask the boy to fetch her a cup of tea. “I didn’t want your future in-laws to get the right idea about me, so I did what I needed to. Congratulations, by the by. I hope you’ll be very happy together.”

He ignored her attempt at well-wishing. “Have you ever done that before? Here, I mean. To me or my father?”

“No,” she said simply. “I don’t have the strength for magic right now.”

“You did yesterday,” he snarled. “And no one even knew it was happening!” He paced around the single room of the cottage, his hands balled into fists. Abruptly, he stopped. “Is that what you did to my father? Is that why he’s gone mad over you?”

A laugh escaped from Belle before she could push it down. “Is that what you think?” she asked the boy. “You’ve never seen your father in love before, have you?”

Baelfire opened his mouth, then closed it. His jaw tightened.

Belle’s head pounded. She rubbed her temples and pressed on. “You don’t know much about magic, either. If you did, you would know that no magic in any world can make someone fall in love with someone else. Not even the Dark One can do that.”

“You--” he sputtered, trying to think of something else to accuse her of. “Y-you’re evil!”

“I am,” Belle conceded. “I am built up of dark and evil magic the same way you’re built up of meat and bone. But I like to think both of us are a bit more than our base materials.”

He swallowed, pressed his lips together. “W-what happens once you get your power back? Once you’re really the Dark One again?”

She looked at him, too tired to tell him anything but the truth. “Your father can control me with the dagger. I’ll never be a threat to you, or Gideon, or anyone you care about.”

When she mentioned the dagger, Baelfire stiffened. He put his arms over his chest again, and covered his mouth with his hand. His face scrunched up, the way Gideon’s did when he cried. The poor boy was practically shaking.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing!” he snapped. “You--you’re wrong! You being here is wrong. You’re the evil one! Not me! It’s not my fault that--” He cut himself off, started storming for the door.

“Bae!” Belle reached out to him, this child who was so clearly in pain.

“Shut up!” He shouted as he wrenched the door open. “Shut the hell up!”

And he was gone.

Belle sank back into the bed, defeated.

#dark mistress #rumbelle #rumbelle fic #rumbelle fanfic #baelfire

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