#i want the shirt i thought up but i thought it up which means it doesnt exist

[vanfleeter]

From The Book

Characters: Jake Kiszka x Fem!reader Warnings: 18+, as usual. A little bit of fluff. A little bit of angst, mentions of stress. Smut. Sex. Fingering. Oral sex (f & m receiving). Penetrative sex. Half protected sex (mentions of bc). A/N: Have you missed me? I sure hope you did, because I've missed you!

House parties. They aren’t your style but you go to one anyway because it’s being hosted by a friend. A friend you’ve known only a short time but became close with quickly. He and his partner were throwing a party to celebrate the end of yet another successful tour.

Everyone is here. Including him.

You don’t know him very well, the same goes both ways. When you’d visit Josh on tour, you’d catch his twin looking your way sometimes, but quickly looking away when you’d catch him. You shared very few words with the man. A simple “hello” shared between you before going your separate ways. Maybe a small wave or a smile.

And tonight. Tonight is going to be the same as always. Small wave and a smile before a simple “hello” greeting before you went to the kitchen to make yourself a drink. He came into the kitchen as well to refresh his drink. You caught him looking at you as you mixed a drink. His cheeks flushed slightly as he looked away and pushed his sunglasses upwards to cover his eyes once again.

You give him a nod of your head before leaving the kitchen to go find people to mingle with.

–

The rest of the night found you isolating yourself in one of Josh’s many guest rooms. Feeling the effects of the alcohol has your head spinning just a little. Closing the door behind you, you walk over to the bed and sink down to the floor and fix your skirt in front of your legs.

It wasn’t long before a knock came on the door. You knew Josh would come looking for you if he hadn’t seen you for a while. He usually does.

But when the door opens, you’re faced with Jake when he peers into the room. “Oh, I’m sorry..” He says. “I didn’t know–Uh–Bathroom downstairs is a bit preoccupied..”

“Bathroom is all yours.” You say, waving your hand in the air in the direction of the connected bathroom.

Jake nods his head before slipping into the room and going to the bathroom. He stops by the door and turns back to face you. “Are you okay?” He asks.

You look up with furrowed brows. “Me?”

He nods his head. “You’re up here alone.. Are you feeling okay?”

“Yeah, I just needed a little space.”

He only hums in response and taps his fingers on the doorframe before going into the bathroom. It was a few moments before he came back out of the bathroom, and a little disheveled. His pants were still undone as he worked to tuck his shirt back in. He catches you watching him. How can you not?

His pants are fully undone, zipped completely down showing his briefs. At the top of the waistband you can see just a sliver of his little happy trail.

“Sorry, I’m a little tipsy..” He giggles as he zips up his pants. He smirks though when he sees you watching him. “But I guess I can put on a good show on and off the stage.”

You quickly look away, feeling your cheeks burn. He chuckles and goes to sit beside you on the floor.

“What are you doing?” You ask.

“Keeping you company.”

“Why?”

“Because if I don’t, Josh will kick my ass.”

“Ahh, so he does know I’m up here.”

Jake nods his head. “He’s the reason that the downstairs bathroom is occupied… So why are you up here? Besides needing space..”

“Oh uh.. Just a little stressed, I guess.. I thought maybe being here I’d feel a little better but I don’t.. And the alcohol does not seem to be helping..”

“What’s going on?”

Slowly you turn your head to look at him. “You really want to listen to the problems of a stranger?”

“Not a stranger,” He says, holding up his finger to get his point across. “An acquaintance, yes. You are Josh’s friend, therefore you are mine, which means I really want to listen.”

“Okay..” You slowly draw out before turning your body sideways that you’re facing him. “I hate my job..”

“I don’t relate..”

You roll your eyes and scoff as you turn to move away, but he reaches for your elbow and draws you back.

“Not so fast.” He chuckles. “I’m just messing with you. Why do you hate your job?”

“Where do I even begin?”

“From the beginning?”

“Jake..” You say, shoving him over.

He laughs and pushes himself back up into a sitting position. “Listen, sweetheart, I’m a little tipsy, let me have my fun.” He says. “What’s going on at work that is currently making you hate it?”

“Well..” You huff a sigh, allowing your shoulders to drop. “I’m being overworked and it sucks… I’ve worked seven days in a row for the past seven weeks and I’m exhausted.. My boss sucks and he’s just overall a fucking creep.. And..” You sigh again and lower your head. “I’m so stressed out..”

“You seem to need a drink.” He says as he pulls himself up off the floor.

You scoff and smile. “I’ve had enough.” You say as you lift your head to look up at him. “Thanks for listening though, but you should go back to the party, you can’t be missed.”

Jake shakes his head and pulls you from the floor. “Like I said, I’m keeping you company.”

“Well I don’t want to go back down there.” You say. “I really just want to be alone.”

“Okay,” Jake says, shrugging his shoulders. “Then I’ll stay here.” He lays out on the bed, crossing his arms behind his head and crossing one leg over the other.

“Jake..”

“Y/N..”

“Please go downstairs, it’s your party too.”

“Eh,” He shrugs his shoulders again and shimmies his hips as he gets comfortable on the bed. “They can live without me.” He pats the empty space on the bed beside him. “Come, come. Lay down and relax.”

Giving in, you crawl onto the bed and lay out beside him. “Despite what Josh may do to you, you don’t have to stay with me. Believe it or not, I actually enjoy being alone.”

A smile spreads on his face. “I do too, but sometimes we all need someone to just be in the same room as.”

“And you won’t be bored?”

Jake shakes his head. “Nope.. Plus I’ve drank enough alcohol to last me the rest of the night.. So.. What do you want to do?” He slowly turns onto his side and rests his head on his hand on a propped up elbow.

“I figured I would lay here…” You say. “Maybe read a little..”

“Read? You don’t have a book.”

You lift up your phone. “I have audio books.”

“So you’re listening to a book being read.”

“Yes,” You say as you unlock your phone and open the audio book app. “Would you like to listen? It will get a little smutty.”

“Are you into that kind of stuff?”

You nod your head and choose a book. “But if you’re not–”

“Never said I wasn’t.” He says. “Start it..”

Clicking the play button, the sound of the narrator’s voice plays through the speaker on your phone.

About halfway through the third chapter, Jake speaks up. “Third chapter and we’re really getting into it.” You giggle, feeling your cheeks burn. “But I have to ask because it got me thinking and now I need to know.”

You pause the book and turn your head to look at him. “You want to know if I actually…”

“Do you?”

“I’ve thought about it..” You say. “But I usually struggle to actually make anything happen.”

“Easier with another person.”

“You could say that..”

Jake hums. “Want to try then?”

“Jacob Thomas, are you horny?” You say, setting your phone and twisting yourself to lay on your side.

“Can you blame me? I just pictured that whole scene in my head and now I’m dying..”

You can’t help the laugh that falls from your lips. “Well I’m sure there’s a woman downstairs that can help you with that.”

You go to climb off the bed when he speaks up again. “What if I wanted you?”

You pause at the foot of the bed before turning to look at him. “I beg your pardon?”

“Well.. I mean.. You’re already here.. I’m horny as fuck and you just said you struggle to get yourself off to this.. Plus, I bet it’d be a great stress reliever.”

You sit there, at the end of the bed, and think about his proposal. How bad could it be? Besides, you haven’t had good sex in months. Though assuming you’ll have good sex with Jake is a stretch, you still barely know him.

“Alright..” You say as you turn around to face him.

He pushes himself up into a sitting position. “Seriously?”

“Don’t let me change my mind.”

“Then lock the door.”

You do as he says and lock the door to the bedroom. He waves you back to the bed. Crawling back onto the bed, he directs you to lay on your back.

“First things first,” He says. “At any given point, you can say no and we can stop.”

“Okay..”

“Can I touch you?” He asks.

“Yes.. Please.. Please touch me..”

He scoffs but gently lays his hand on your thigh. He slowly slides his hand up underneath your skirt. His eyes look back at you and you nod your head. He moves your underwear to the side and slowly presses his middle finger in through your folds. You let out a pitchy moan as he slowly starts to pump his fingers inside of you.

“How did it go in the book?” He asks.

“This is just…fine..” You breathe. “Perfect.. Please keep going.”

“Yeah?”

You nod your head and chew on your bottom lip. He continues pumping his fingers before dragging them down your walls, just like it was described in the book. “Oh fuck, Jake…” You tighten your thighs around his arm as he keeps pumping his fingers inside of you.

“Am I doing it right?”

“Fuck.. Yes..”

You can feel your core tightening the longer he fucks his fingers inside of you. But that isn’t all that you feel. Jake’s taken it upon himself to grind against your thigh. His hardened cock can be felt through his pants. Even though he’s working you to your own orgasm, you slip your hand between you two and rub him through his pants.

“Naughty girl..” He says.

“Don’t want you to feel left out..”

He chuckles and leans down to kiss your neck. “We’ll get there.”

He keeps pumping his fingers and dragging them along your walls until he’s finally got your coming undone on his hand. “There you are beautiful.”

You're thankful that the music is loud enough that no one downstairs can hear you moaning Jake’s name.

“You sound so beautiful.”

As you come down from your high, he removes his fingers from inside of you and licks them clean of your release.

“You even taste beautiful too.”

You can’t help but to roll your eyes before you sit up and slide your body down the bed.

“What are you doing?” He asks.

You simply ignore him and get to work on undoing his belt and unzipping his pants. He lifts his hips high enough for you to pull his pants down to set him free. And when he is, you set to work. First wrapping your mouth around his cock and taking him in as far as you can.

He breathes out a breathy moan as he rests his arms behind his head.

You glance up slightly to see him already looking down at you. Sticking out your tongue, you curl it around his shaft before dragging it upwards as you release him from your mouth. Going back down again, you keep a steady pace of bobbing your head until he takes over and thrusts his hips up, pushing himself deeper into your mouth until he touches the back of your throat. You gag slightly and he moans.

“Baby, I think I’m gonna..” He moans. “I can’t..”

You continue your pattern of bobbing and licking him, slowly bringing him to his own release. His warm seed fills your mouth and you swallow it quickly, allowing only a little of it to dribble down your chin. He quickly sits up and pulls you in for a kiss and licks up the rest of his release from your chin.

He brings his other hand to your hip and gives it a little squeeze. “Clothes off..” He says.

Doing as he says, you climb off of the bed and start to pull your up and over your head before tossing it to the floor. His jaw falls slack when he discovers that you’ve opted for no bra for the night. He slides his pants off the rest of the way and kicks them to the floor before pulling you back onto his lap. Instantly he envelopes one of your breasts in his mouth and sucks gently on your nipple. He gives it a soft tug with his teeth before moving onto the next one.

He has you bent over backwards as he licks through the valley of your breasts and leaves sloppy, wet kisses down to your naval. Pulling you back up, he rolls you both over and continues kissing down your body until he reaches the waistband of your underwear. He tugs on them with his teeth and pulls them down from your waist.

After he fully takes them off, he settles him between your legs and kisses around your aching core. You whimper when you feel him slide his tongue through your folds only to flick your clit with his tongue.

“That wasn’t… In the book..” You moan.

He chuckles, the vibration feeling pleasurable against your sensitive bundle of nerves. “I know..”

Asshole.

He slides his tongue inside of you, making your back arch and your toes curl as you squeeze his head between your thighs. You can feel him smile again but he never lets up. He goes back to thrusting his tongue inside of you. He kneads his fingers into the skin of your hips, pushing you closer to his face.

He soon pulls away, making you whine from the loss of contact. He smirks and unbuttons the rest of his shirt before discarding it to the floor. Leaning back over you, he leaves kisses back up your body before stopping on your lips. Your slick covered his mouth and that’s what you could taste mixed with the alcohol still lingering on his lips.

“Definitely not in the book.”

He releases a breathy laugh against your cheek. He nudges your head to the side with his nose and presses a kiss to the backside of your ear.

“None of this will be from the book..” He says in your ear. “This is all me..” He presses his cock against your soaked core making you gasp. “May I?”

“Jacob has manners..” You tease.

Jake takes a hand and twists your nipple making you gasp. “Of course I do, darling.” He says with his faux English accent. “Yes or no, sweetheart?”

“Yes…” You sigh. “Please, yes.”

“Now look who’s using their manners?”

“I have been using my manners..” You say, reaching down to squeeze his ass.

He chuckles and reaches a hand down between the two of you. Lining himself up with your entrance he slowly eases himself inside as far as he can go.

“Sweet mother of pearls..” He groans, his head resting in the crook of your neck. “You feel so good… Do you feel okay?” He asks and lifts his head to look at you.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” You say.

Lifting himself up on his hands, he starts to move, sliding out to the tip before pushing back inside. His eyes never left yours as he thrusted into you over and over again.

“Fucking is such a good stress reliever,” Jake says between thrusts. “Don’t you think?”

“Yes..” You moan. “So.. So good..”

You palm his ass cheeks in your hands forcing him deeper inside of you. He groans, rolling his eyes. He leans his head down and sucks as your neck, not once breaking the steady rhythm of his thrusts. You wrap your arms around his waist, digging your fingertips into his back, feeling his muscles flexing with each movement that he makes.

You find yourself sinking your teeth into his shoulder as the coil in your core grows tighter and tighter.

By now the bedposts were hitting the wall, the bed creaking with every thrust. No doubt anyone downstairs could hear everything now. Your moans filled his ears like a melody though to anyone else, they probably sounded pornagraphic.

He can feel your walls tighten around his cock and he smiles against your neck. “Let go for me baby..” He says.

And you do.

The coil finally snapped inside of you and you cried out his name as your orgasm washes over you.

“Such a good girl.” You can hear him say as he continues fuckin into you. He works himself to his own orgasm and he goes to pull out but you stop him.

“I’m on the pill..” You say breathlessly. “Fill me up, Jake.. I want to feel all of it…”

“Yeah?”

You eagerly nod your head, tightening your legs around his body and caging him in. He chuckles and thrusts a few more times before he’s reaching his own high. His body tenses and he’s emptying out completely inside of you.

“Gah, fuck!” He cries out before he’s bearing all of his weight on top of your body.

A minute later, he’s carefully withdrawing from inside of you before rolling over and dropping down onto his back.

“Soo.. What was better? This? Or the book?” He says as he turns over onto his side to face you.

You can’t stifle the laugh that escapes you. “You must not be confident if you’re comparing yourself to a fictional character.”

He rolls his eyes and props himself up on his elbow. “Yes, well, you can’t have sex with a fictional character.”

“One can dream..” You hum.

“Are you feeling less stressed now then?”

“Very.. You?”

He scoffs. “I was never stressed.”

“I’d beg to differ..” You say. “You went from soft and sweet to rough and angry–not that I’m complaining, but it appears I’m not the only one who was stressed.”

“Consider this a “the end of tour fucking”.” He says. “I’m so relieved that it’s over.”

“Ahhh so you were stressed.” You say, patting his chest and sitting up.

You climb off the bed and retrieve your underwear to pull back followed by your dress. Jake was following closely behind and buckling his belt when a knock came on the door.

“Room’s occupied.” Jake calls.

“Yeah I know,” Josh calls back through the door. “I owe Sam twenty bucks. But when you come downstairs, can you bring the sheets with you and throw them in the washer?”

You can’t help but to giggle when you see Jake’s face flush with red. “Sure, whatever.”

“Thank you!” Josh calls again.

The two of you soon make your way downstairs again and split in different directions, Jake to the laundry room and you to the kitchen. Josh is standing at the island counter with a fresh drink in his hand and a smirk plastered on his face.

“I knew inviting you tonight would be a good thing.”

“You tell no one, it just happened.”

“Oh honey, everyone heard..” Sam says as he walks by and sips on his drink.

“Then I think we did a great job.” You hear Jake from behind you.

“Oh gross..” Sam groans as he takes another drink and leaves the kitchen.

___________________________________________________

general tag list:

@watchingover-hypegirl @losfacedevil @ignite-my-fire @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @writingcold @jaketlove @mackalah @lexii-nv-c @em-gvf01 @katiegvf @joshkiszkaenthusiast @takenbythemadness @jakekiszkasmommy @objectsinspvce @gvfmarge @heckingfrick @bluemeadows77 @laneygvf @sacredmachine @gvfpal @killerqueengvf @jaketlover @jordinlkiszka @alwaysonthemend @hellowgoodbye @anythingforjtk @hi-hi-hello11 @anthemofgvf @gretasfallingsky @songbirds-sweet @wildbluesorbit @klarxtr @stardustsecret @sunandthemoontwinflames @everyglowinthetwilightknows @sinsofstardust @sparrowofthedawnsworld @josh-iamyour-mama @dannys-dream @peaceloveunitygvf @dayumclarizzel @thetroublegetssoloud71 @jakebrainrot @gretavanfleetmichelle

Want to be added to my general tag list? Please reach out and I'll be happy to add you! ♡

If you are missing from the list, I do apologize--I may have missed you or tumblr won't let me tag you! But please reach out and let me know if you do not see yourself and I will work on getting that fixed!

#jake kiszka #greta van fleet #greta van fleet fic #greta van fleet fanfic #jake kiszka fanfic #jake kiszka fic #jake kiszka smut #gvf

[pumpkinbxtch]

I need to say here: I think a "Leo x time traveler from the 40's" (like nico and hazel) dynamic would be cute If demigods could use cellphones, because Leo is a yk technology genius and the other person would be a grandparent who always says something like "help me how do I get out of this app" or "how do I install Google"

the god of 'app store'

— leo valdez x 40's time traveler!reader

warnings; none, maybe shitty writing

a/n; yes. period, i mean- that's a kind of relationship like he used to had with calypso and hazel but kinda fits? thank you, idk if you were asking but I had an idea tho.

— Give me that! — Leo said, bursting into the apartment, kicking off his shoes, and staggering toward you. You didn't know what to do; you were watching something on TV, and his entrance had scared you. His eyes were fixed on something next to you, and when you realized what it was, you cursed under your breath.

— Leo.

— You didn't activate it? — He asked, seeing the phone turned off, just a pretty paperweight on the table next to you. You shook your head, resting your head on one hand while stealing glances at the TV. Honestly, it didn't interest you much. You had lived your life without it, and you didn't think it was so necessary, but the worried look on your boyfriend's face made you rethink that idea.

— Honey, — He sighed as he sat on the biggest couch and turned on the phone. — I wanted to know if you were okay, and you didn't answer. I thought something might have happened to you, and...

— So you ended up here — You said as you got up and sat next to him. He nodded as he checked the device in his hands. It looked like a normal phone, but the technology he had implemented made it so that monsters couldn't detect it, and thus your life was no longer at risk.

— It's like new — He said, confused.

— You gave it to me at the beginning of the week.

— No, I mean... You haven't turned it on since then.

You looked at your boyfriend and then at the phone, discovering a picture of the two of you on it. You raised an eyebrow.

— Why are we there? — Your question made him laugh, and he gave you a kiss on the cheek.

You understood; he had put it there. You didn't know how, but he had surely done it and probably expected a comment from you, which of course never came because you were too scared to use it. Suddenly, a wave of curiosity washed over you, and you clung to Leo's shirt sleeve. He glanced at you.

— Can you show me again? — His eyes lit up, and you had never felt better about asking for help.

After the lessons, you were a bit confused, but you seemed to have understood something: everything came from a place called the App Store.

You took the phone in your hands and went into that app to see what else you could download. However, you realized that at least the essentials were already installed. You looked at your boyfriend, who was distracted with his own 'latest tech gadget,' as he called it to buyers, or just a phone as he usually shortened it. He was watching a cat video, something you never understood but didn't intend to. Still, you felt like you had the best boyfriend. Very understanding and sweet in explaining things.

— Thanks, great Leo, god of the App Store — You said, giggling. He raised an eyebrow playfully and shook his head, amused.

— I wouldn't say that, sweetie, or the real gods might hear us.

— Are you saying I haven't been with one this whole time?

Your question made him blush, and he clicked his tongue, trying to pretend to be calm, but it wasn't easy when you set aside your phone, leaving it forgotten to climb into his lap and kiss him. Sometimes you were the one who dragged him into the present life, one he was delighted to share with you.

#pjo hoo toa #heroes of olympus #leo valdez #pjo #maría's shared dreams☆｡ﾟ✧ #leo valdez x reader #leo valdez x you #leo valdez x y/n #hoo x reader #pjo x reader #leo valdez fic #leo valdez blurb #leo valdez pjo #leo valdez fanfic

[lowkeychenle]

Some Things Can't Be Taught [ZCL] (M) fic teaser

Description: In which you are failing college physics, and your childhood best friend offers up one of his friends as your tutor—except, there’s a little something he wants to learn from you in exchange.

Genre: Smut/Fluff/Angst in some spots

Content Warnings: explicit, protected sex; awkward Chenle; reader is more experienced (Chenle is a virgin); reader and Chenle ridicule each other; use of pet name ‘baby’ (Chenle isn’t creative yet); oral sex (f & m receiving); alcohol consumption; maybe more to come

Release Date: 5.31.2024

Expected Word Count: 15-20k

Teaser Word Count: 530

Taglist: open! comment or send an ask to be added

Permanent Taglist: open! comment or send an ask to be added

Pairing: Zhong Chenle x fem!reader (features Dreamies, aespa Giselle & Karina)

Juliet's Masterlist | Tell me what you think? :)

Everything was normal until the next Saturday. You don’t usually see Chenle on the weekends unless there’s a party you’re dragging him to. Today, you hoped to relax your brain and take a day for yourself, but the knock at your door decided otherwise.

You open it, and Chenle stands there, looking as if he’s about to be sick to his stomach. Recoiling, you step back to let him in, and he enters without a word.

“Are you okay?” you ask. “You didn’t tell me you were coming.”

“I don’t want to be a virgin anymore.”

You flounder for words, unsure of how to handle this situation. “I thought you wanted a real opportunity—”

“Opportunities are made, aren’t they?” He wets his lips. “How do I…I don’t want to be fucking awful when I do find someone, okay?”

“Chenle, that’s a wild way to think of it. If you want to be with someone you love, and you’re in a relationship long enough to get to that point, the other person should be understanding—”

“It’s not a big deal. Societal constructs or whatever.”

“I…Okay. I’ll help you find someone.” Your brain whirls at the sudden switch, and you shift on your feet. “Are you sure?”

There’s a moment of silence, accompanied with him looking up at the ceiling briefly, as if there are words locked in his throat he desperately wants to let out. He curses under his breath and shakes his head.

“I don’t want someone random.”

“You have someone in mind?”

“This is so fucking embarrassing.” He laughs at himself and pinches the bridge of his nose. “Please don’t be weirded out by this. But I need to be with someone I trust, and you…you’re the only girl I trust.”

The shock hits you so hard, you’re almost knocked off balance. You knew Chenle had gotten more comfortable with you, but this stretches a bit beyond that. And before you knew he was a virgin, you wouldn’t have said no to hooking up with him.

“Me.” You gulp. “You want…to have sex with me.”

“Okay, now it’s weird.” His fists clench at his sides and he avoids your gaze. “Forget I came by, okay? I’m sorry that was so weird, we can just never talk about it again, and I’ll keep…being me, and—”

“Slow down, please.” You card your fingers through your hair and try to force the shock away. “I didn’t even respond. Give me like three seconds to wrap my head around it.”

He nods in response, staring down at his feet.

“So, you…you trust me. And because of that, you want me to take your virginity?” You’re still not completely caught up.

“Yeah, it sounded better in my head, I think.”

“Is that the only reason you want me instead of someone else?” you ask.

“What do you mean by that?” He plays with the bottom hem of his T-shirt. “But you’re not—it’s not like that. I trust you. We both know I think you’re pretty. I’ve learned a lot of…things from you, and I thought that maybe we could—”

“You want sex lessons.”

“Can you—My God, please don’t say it like that.” He cringes.

#nct dream #chenle #nct #nct dream smut #nct imagines #nct smut #chenle smut #nct scenarios #chenle scenarios #chenle fluff #chenle angst #nct dream x reader #nct dream imagines #nct dream fluff #nct dream scenarios

[3xiles]

Sweet lies part two

Pairing •Toji x gn!reader

Warnings• Angst!, Cheating, suggestive (they like lowkey make out), manipulation, UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP!, Cursing. Lmk if i forgot any!

Word count • 1079 words

A/n • I had this pre written ever since i put out the first part but was so hesitant on posting it LMAO! Enjoy! Masterlist is pinned!

You knew life after the honeymoon phase was rough but nothing could’ve prepared you for the drastic switch in you and Toji’s relationship. About two months the after you guys got married is when you realized the mistake you made. Your days went from him coming home from work and showering you with affection to him coming in with an inaudible hello. You were confused on what you could be doing wrong. He was coming home to a clean house with food on the table, a bath prepared and you all dolled up for him, just how he liked it. This went on for months and throughout those months he’s just been coming home later and later. The man who was once coming home every day at five now walking through the front door as late as ten at night. It didn’t bother you until your 26th birthday.

You woke up excited to celebrate your first birthday as a married woman. For your birthday last year Toji went all out so you couldn’t help but let your expectations be high! Toji wasn’t there when you woke up, which was normal because he usually leaves extremely early in the morning. You spent your day pampering yourself to the max, expecting to maybe go out later. Soon enough five o clock rolls around. You sit pretty and patient on the couch, telling yourself he’s just running a little late. You wait… and you wait.. sending text after text to your husband every hour.

Hubby💍❤️

5:30pm

Y/n: Hey babe coming home soon?

6:15

Y/n: Toj idk what you have planned but i’m super excited! see you soon❤️

7:23

Y/n: Hey is everything okay??

8:54

Y/n: Hello?

9:46

Y/n: Toji it’s almost 10 where are you?

10:27

Y/n: Toji?

You send your last text with tears falling from your eyes. You hate to think he forgot your birthday. It can’t be. He just got caught up in something. It has to be. You check the time one last time. 11:03. You then tell yourself you need to go to bed. As you stand up from the couch the door opens and the man you’ve been waiting for finally shows. You do nothing but stare at him, tears mixed with mascara running down your puffy cheeks. “The hell happened to you?” he says, taking off his shoes, tie, and blazer. He begins to unbutton his shirt, purple marks adorning his chest. That was in that moment when something in you just… snapped.

“Toji, what is today?” you slowly walk towards him. He shrugs, scratching the back of his head. “Look doll, i’m beat. Can we talk tomorrow?” he begins to walk towards the stairs that lead to your shared bedroom “No. Absolutely the fuck not.” oh crap. did you just say that? he stops in his tracks and turns to you. “Excuse me?” Shitshitshitshitshit what do you say? why did u say that? “Toji i asked you a question. What. Is. Today.” you keep up the tough girl act, too deep to back out now. “Y/n.” he walks closer to you but you back away “Toji today is my fucking birthday. Today is my birthday and i’ve been home all day thinking my ‘husband’ was going to at least come home on time but you were out fucking some bitch!” You begin to yell, crying harder than you were before. “The fuck are you talking about?” You weren’t stupid, you knew he was cheating but who were you to say anything. You were nothing without him. You didn’t want to ruin things. You can’t lose him. “Toji, i know you’re seeing someone else but i at least thought you would have some type of respect or decency to not do this to me on my fucking birthday.”You’re falling apart in front of him.

The silence is strong. He walks towards you and wraps his arms around you, holding you close. “Things just haven’t been right with me, i don’t know why i do the things i do. You know how much you mean to me baby, i never want to hurt you.” i never want to hurt you. Those words replay in your mind. He brings his hands to hold your face, wiping your tears with his thumbs. “You know I love you and only you, right?” you wanted to yell at him. You wanted to kick and scream but something in you made you believe every word he was saying. Instead of doing any of those things you just nodded. Shame rose in you but it all started to fade away when his lips connect with yours. You know this isn’t right, this isn’t healthy but that doesn’t stop you from wrapping your arms around his neck and letting his hands wander. “I’m so sorry baby.” his lips travel to your neck. You try to hold back sounds but he knows just what to do to get it out if you. “Gonna let me show my girl how sorry i am?” you just started at him. not wanting to say yes but you didn’t want to disappoint him by saying no either.

You have to draw a line somewhere. “I think i just wanna go to sleep…” Removing your hands from him and stepping back. His looks confused but he doesn’t press further. Is it bad that part of you wishes he did? You wished he would’ve showed some kind of kind want, not just wanting to fuck out of pity. You know why he didn’t tho, he already got his fix of pussy for the night and it didn’t come from you. What a shame.

That night you couldn’t sleep, you were up all night silently crying. Is this really what your life was? You had lost yourself in this relationship. Your 26th birthday was a wake up call. The next few days were rough, he was just coming home later and later. Not to mention he wasn’t even trying to hide his affairs, He started to be careless. Not bothering to cover the scratches or hickeys that covered his body, leaving his phone open when you could see messages from the multiple girls and having panties and various other items in his car that didn’t belong to you. It’s like he was trying to hurt you, but isn’t that what he said he never wanted to do?

#anime #toji fushiguro #jjk #jjk thoughts #jjk toji #jjk x reader #jujutsu toji #toji angst #toji x reader #toji x y/n #toji x you #jujutsu kaisen toji #jjk x you #jjk shiu #jjk fanfic #jjk smut #jjk angst #jujitsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen #toji zenin #toji fushigro x reader #toji fic #toji fluff #toji smut #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu megumi #jujutsu sorcerer

[brabblesblog]

𝕽𝖊𝖒𝖊𝖒𝖇𝖊𝖗 𝖞𝖊 𝖓𝖔𝖙 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖒𝖊𝖗 𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘.

Chapter 16: What's left of kisses? Wounds, however, leave scars.

A sequel to Whither is thy beloved gone? (AO3)

After the events of ‘Whither is thy beloved gone?’ Lord Astarion Ancuńin and his consort wife navigate their relationship anew. The ghosts of the past - his, hers, and theirs - threaten to unravel everything they’ve worked for.

Astarion and Ban attend the debutante's ball.

Professionally edited and collaborated on by my dearest friend <3 @editing-by-night

Read on AO3.

Masterlist

Art by Naaty

For a smutty render go to the AO3 link :P

She sat at the table, watching the debutante pass by. Corrinne glided by in a massive pink tulle gown - a showstopper, for sure, Ban thought - a gaggle of her friends trailing behind her.

The party hadn’t been too bad, all told, the food decent and the wine palatable. Astarion had disappeared sometime during the proceedings, arm in arm with Meiros. She’d been introduced to the master of the mirror-makers’ guild, had shaken his hand and smiled politely, but the man had seemed keen on holding negotiations with her husband alone. Astarion had shot her an apologetic look and left, but hadn’t protested at all, which was odd.

It was not an uncommon occurrence - some of the people they dealt with did not mind having her present, but inevitably some did. The first time someone had asked for Astarion to keep his spouse waiting outside he had seethed, about to launch into a tirade, when she had grabbed his wrist and told him to just go along with it - it would be quick, and it would be easier than offending someone they needed to cozy up to.

He had given her a long-winded talk that evening. She sipped her glass, smiling ruefully at the memory.

“What is the point,” he thundered, “of all this effort to mark you as my equal, if at the first sign of resistance you give in?”

She watched him tug off his shirt, tossing it away with a little more venom than he normally would. “I just think that some of the time we have to let them have their way. Easier than arguing and potentially losing out on-”

“I don’t care!” Astarion marched to her, placing his palms on the tub and leaning over where she was soaking. “We are to be wed soon. I would not have those morons think you’re…” he gestured with a hand, “you’re still some…”

“Consort? I mean, we still do use that term, at times.” Not in private, not in most circumstances, but in certain circles, yes.

He exhaled. “Consort, fine, when we must. Some plaything of mine, absolutely not.” Crimson burned into her, his anger evident, with lingering traces of guilt as well. She covered the hand grasping the tub with her own.

“Consorts can wait outside for their lords, Astarion, every once in a while. It’s fine.”

He deflated, eyes softening. “I’d still want to at least insist on your presence being invaluable to me.”

“If those people want me out of the room, saying so would merely make you seem weak.”

Astarion tugged off his trousers and underwear, grumbling to himself. He stepped into the tub and sat down, still glaring at her. “I’ve half a mind to invite whoever asks that of me to a party, lock all the doors, and…”

He let the thought sit, a small smirk dancing across his lips. She laughed. “Do that, and we’ll have all the nobles of Baldur’s Gate on our tails. Don’t.”

“The request you plan to make, if you do make it, can easily be done,” Meiros said, tapping his hands on the mahogany desk he was seated at. Astarion was pacing back and forth, rubbing his chin. “If I understand correctly - this is for your wife, is it not?”

“Which is why I asked you to request to meet me alone,” Astarion answered.

Meiros nodded. “Roderich hasn’t been the most active member the past few years, something his fellow guildmates and I are frankly pleased about. When I found out you were marrying a Glasscraft, I had assumed I would never see you outside my door, so imagine my surprise when you showed up.”

“And I suppose no one has seen any Glasscraft other than Roderich himself?”

“You’d be correct. There was only ever him. Oh, he used to say he had a loving wife at home, and two wonderful children to take over his business, but,” Meiros shrugged, “as I said. He stopped showing up to guild events. He’s still well-known, of course, with his gaggle of old, loyal customers, but we all assumed he was working on some new secret method or some such. When I heard about Barcus’ advancements in the mines, I thought Roderich might have already gotten his hands on that material.”

Astarion stopped pacing to lean on a chair, hands wrapped around its back. “Last time I purchased a mirror from him he was still harping on mercury being the best.”

“Then he is woefully behind.” Meiros stood up. “Well. If you do wish to push this through, I would be more than delighted to fulfill your request. I’m sure most of the members would have no complaints, either. A pleasure doing business with you, Lord Ancunín.”

The men shook hands.

Ban saw the side door open and Meiros walked in, followed by Astarion. The talks seemed to have gone well; they were chatting animatedly. She watched as he waved his daughter over to be introduced. Corrinne flounced to her father’s side, or at least attempted to - the rather large skirt bumped people’s legs as she passed - and finally arrived in front of the two men.

The girl’s eyes widened as she took in Astarion, and Ban smirked inwardly. He kissed Corrinne’s hand and her face flushed beet red. Ban leaned back, enjoying the show, sipping her wine absently; with Astarion’s mind unlinked from hers, it merely tasted dull.

It was fine. She knew her husband was accustomed to shallow admirers, and Ban was used to people who’d look at him, look at her, and deem her unworthy of him - just like Corrinne was doing now. Ban caught that furtive glare aimed her way, the quick up-and-down movement that told her the girl was sizing her up and found her lacking, and the satisfied grin on her face as she turned back to Astarion. Nothing new, nothing surprising, and nothing he couldn’t handle.

She found herself scanning the rest of the room, more than a little bored. She noted Meiros talking to another guest, gesturing towards Astarion. Likely he was discussing whatever their meeting had been about. The other guest looked intrigued, and Ban pondered again what her husband could be up to with the guild. She continued her visual roam around the party, finding nothing else of note taking place.

As her eyes made their way back to them, her husband’s eyes locked onto hers, and she raised her glass in greeting, amused. She was about to lean back and continue watching when she realized that Astarion hadn’t moved - was frozen, in fact. The pinched eyes, that slight part of his lips, and the furrow of his brow told her all she needed to know. In the same instant she recognized it, she felt his mind prod hers.

There were no words, just a flash of memory - from mere seconds ago, gauging by the expression on his face.

Corrinne laughed, bending over to do so, making sure Astarion received an eyeful of her rather ample bosom. She grabbed his shoulder. “Oh, sorry, Lord Astarion. I didn’t mean to. It’s just these shoes…” She made a show of falling off-balance, likely a little more drunk than she ought to be, and he automatically caught her elbow to steady her. The size of her skirt meant that to do so Astarion had to lean in somewhat, and she took the opportunity to step closer to his body, the skirt bunching up between them.

Meiros had already walked away, talking to a passing guest. Corrinne shot Astarion a coy look; Astarion - and through him, Ban - felt her thigh press between his legs, hidden by the voluminous dress. Corrine ran her hand from his shoulder to his neck - Ban felt him shiver - and then dragged her nails down his chest to his hip. The thigh pressed against him harder. “We could sneak away for a few minutes, handsome,” she purred. “I don’t think your wife would mind.”

The effect was instantaneous. His thoughts flicked through old, haunting memories, his grip on her tightening incrementally. There was a boiling rage, a near-overwhelming urge to snap Corrinne’s neck - held back solely by the fact that he needed to be in Meiros’ good graces and the presence of the countless guests at the party.

“I am not interested,” he ground out, a sneer pasted on his face, “regardless of whether or not she would mind.”

Ban felt his impotent rage shifting into panic, held at bay and hidden behind the veneer of his cold dismissal. His breathing hitched, pulse picking up, posture stiffening; something that Corrinne seemed to have interpreted as interest, despite his words. She kept talking.

Ban’s eyes snapped back to him. He was still staring at her, expression blank, holding Corrinne’s elbow while she chattered away. Ban’s hand instinctively closed around the hilt of the sword she wasn’t carrying, bile rising in her throat. She felt warm all over, enraged, but in a way she’d never felt before. The feeling was completely foreign and it took her utterly by surprise, but it also felt like it was something that had always been a part of her, lying dormant until this moment.

She stood up.

As she began cutting her way through the crowd, Meiros wandered even further away, heading for the guest’s table. Thanking the gods for that small blessing, Ban reached Astarion’s side. She cleared her throat, leveling a searing glare at the vapid young woman and then at her hand, still caressing Astarion’s hip. “Kindly take your hand off my husband, if you want to keep it attached to your body.”

Corrine looked down at her, nose wrinkling. “You must be Missus Ancunín,” she said, offering a dainty hand, the same one she’d been touching him with. She had not backed away from Astarion, her body still pressed against his.

Ban did not take the proffered hand. “Indeed I am, and that’s my husband you are clinging to. How… unbecoming. You must be drunk, so I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt,” Ban replied coolly, “because I assume, were you in control of your faculties, you wouldn’t dream of offending your father’s guests in this manner. I’m quite sure your father would take a very dim view of you accosting his business partner with that thigh, Corrinne.”

She blanched, blinking furiously. “I- um…”

“Put your leg down, and take a step back. Unless you want me to either tell your father you’ve just groped a married man, who has important business dealings with him, or you want to wake up bloodied and broken on this ballroom floor. Either way,” she smiled pleasantly, “I’ll be the one going home with him. He is not yours, Corinne, and never will be.”

Through it all she could feel Astarion slowly calming. He slipped his hand away from Corrinne, trembling ever so slightly. As Ban finished speaking and Corinne stepped back, he finally moved, taking a step towards her.

Ban took his hand. He seemed to look at the ring on her finger for a long moment, then turned to the debutante. “Corrinne. Have a wonderful evening.” The words were completely devoid of emotion, and Ban felt a chill run up her spine.

She linked her arm through his and led the way, him trailing silently. Ban searched for somewhere private to take him. She spied a door, slightly ajar, and made a beeline for it, slipping in and shutting it behind them the moment they were inside.

It was a small study, and she immediately located an armchair. Her eyes returned to her husband’s face. He looked lost and a little scared; his eyes were blank, as if he wasn’t even in there.

“Are you okay?”

He blinked, then his expression snapped into one of chilly indifference. She noted it, the way his jaw clenched and was forcibly relaxed. “Fine,” he said, the falseness clear as day. He tugged at his sleeve. “That was nothing new. I’ve had my fair share of advances, and that was one of the most amateur attempts I’ve ever seen - to be expected of course, given her youth. One would ideally press their thigh in a grinding motion, not ram it straight up,” he scoffed.

She guided him towards the armchair. “Sit, Astarion.” He did so, but his mouth kept moving, a desperate attempt at feigning nonchalance.

“Of course I could have simply told her not to, or pushed her off, or threatened her - a million options, really - however, offending her father would not have been ideal for our plans. I-”

She knelt in front of him and grasped both of his hands. “Look at me. Take a deep breath, and just look at me.”

He trailed off, chest rising and falling far too rapidly for her liking. “I said I’m fine.”

“You are fine. You’re safe.” She kept her hands on his, avoiding touching him anywhere else, unsure what he could tolerate at the moment.

“Safe,” he repeated. “A fine sentiment, but we never really are, are we?” His shoulders finally sagged, the proud arch of his brow falling as his eyes fell shut. “It’s been more than a year since I’ve been… his, but it still haunts me as if it were merely yesterday.”

The trappings of power, of riches and decadent luxury - none of it mattered when he was faced with the memories of endless hands on him, of thighs pressed between his legs, of needing to slip deep into his mind to escape. It had been one thing to let the twins touch him and sit in his lap to maintain his facade in front of the other vampire lord - it was quite another to be randomly accosted and treated like property when he least expected it.

Ban looked at him, pained. “You were a slave for centuries, my love. It will take more than a year to recover from that. Things will get easier, but sometimes something will remind you of… before, and then it will come back. But I’ll always be here, to help you, to protect you when you need it.”

He smiled, leaning forwards to touch his forehead to hers; she sighed in relief.

“You’d think I’d remember that, but it always catches me off-guard.”

“It does so for me as well.” He sighed as she spoke and his breath fanned over her face. It was slowing, thankfully. “Can I…” she trailed off, and he opened his eyes. He gave a small huff of assent and her arms wrapped around him, pulling him into a tight hug.

“You never have to ask, but I find myself grateful that you do.”

He was nestled between her breasts, eyes wide open. The slow ruffling of Ban’s hand through his hair was comforting, although the strands tickled his eyes. He shifted, placing his chin flat on her sternum. Ban returned his gaze.

“Decided you want to read more?” she asked.

“Wasn’t much help.” He rolled over, but grabbed the book anyway. It had been laying facedown on the page he’d given up at. “But I suppose I could give it another shot.” He propped the book on his chest as he leaned against the headboard.

She glanced at him. “I trust your conversation with Meiros went well, at least?”

He grunted, flipping to another page. She waited for a response - none came.

“And?”

He flipped another page, far too fast to actually be reading it. “And things are proceeding as planned. Like I’ve said, Ban. Let me handle it.” There it was again, that edge in his voice.

He hadn’t spoken much after the party. They had gone home, and bathed, but he’d been mostly silent throughout. She’d given him his space, scrubbed him down and allowed him to wash her as they usually did, but then they’d gone to bed and he’d immediately buried himself in his book with nary a word in her direction.

She bit back the urge to simply ignore his distress and leave him be. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Crimson eyes flicked over her for a second - she noted the way his gaze raked over her features, another tell - and he exhaled. “The novel is trite, dry, and the heroine dully heroic.”

Ban covered her face with her hands, choking back a frustrated groan. Do better. “That’s not what I asked, and we both know it. This… isn’t about Corrinne, is it? Or if it is, there’s more.”

Astarion snapped the book shut. It was uncommon for her to see his ire nowadays, much less to be the object of it, but there it was. He exhaled through his nose. “You loathed it when I prodded you. Must you do the same?”

The response died in her mouth. She wasn’t sure how to address it - in the past, stoking the fires of his anger had been a thoughtless thing, fighting back with barbed words second nature - but not anymore. Not that she didn’t feel the petty desire to do so rising in her throat, but she couldn’t. Wouldn’t.

She thought for a moment, choosing her next words with care. “Just as I’ve learned to try to open up to you, I hope you will do the same for me.” Taking the book from his hands, she set it down and leaned over. “May I?”

At his nod, she laid over his chest, her head settling against his heart. “You don’t need to. I just want you to feel better,” she murmured.

He was quiet, reaching over to pick the book back up again. The minutes passed, one to ten to thirty, the only sound the occasional turning of pages and the scratch of his fingers against paper, his breathing, and the painfully fast heartbeat thrumming beneath her ear.

She waited.

“No use feigning sleep,” Astarion finally drawled. “You’re mad, aren’t you?”

“Frustrated. Concerned. Not mad.” She felt him shift, his muscled chest rippling under her as he placed an arm under his head, the book still in the other.

“Now you know how it feels,” he said under his breath. As he did so his pulse hammered harder, and Ban decided enough was enough. She placed a hand on his chest, beside her face, watching the ring glint in the moonlight.

“Does that give you some sort of satisfaction? Because I’d understand if it did. But I’d prefer we talk about it.”

That took him by surprise. His eyes locked onto her, wide. She met them without hesitation, watching his expression soften as he finally gave in.

“One - I have no idea who I married a tenday ago, because I’m not exactly sure it’s the Ban I knew.” He laughed humorlessly. “Two - it might be silly,” he looked away, “but I’d thought this would all be… if not over, at least… lessened.”

He set the book down by his side and wrapped an arm around her. “I’m no idiot. I am aware it doesn’t ever truly fade away, but today it caught me unawares.”

“I can’t blame you for that. You haven’t had any encounters like that in a while, nor should you have to expect them in the first place.” The hand on his chest closed into a fist. “If it were not for her father I’d have beaten her where she stood.”

He shrugged. “That’s… not my concern at the moment.” Ban sighed - she had been right. There was more.

“Then what is it?”

She watched his lips part, fangs peeking as he licked his lips nervously. “I worry that in a century, or in five centuries, this will still happen. That it will keep happening again and again, in moments when I least expect it. I will freeze as I did today. It will feel like nothing has changed, no matter how much time has passed. I may never fully…heal.” He took a deep breath, her head rising and falling with it, his heart racing as he finally spoke the fears he’d been haunted by the past few hours. “You’d be spending eternity bound to a pathetic, broken, man.”

Ban shook her head; she couldn’t help taking offense. “I fell in love with you the way you are. Why worry about that? Do you think I’m still that selfish, that I still require you to be a certain way to love you? Because - well, I understand and I’m still working on it, but truly?”

“No. I merely pity you for having to deal with it. I thought the wedding would…” a growl ripped through him, “...would at least fix something.”

“A wedding doesn’t guarantee everything will be sunshine afterwa-”

“Well it should!”

She flinched. He tightened his grip on her. “I worry about how this will affect us, in the long term.” He raised her hand to the light, admiring the ring on her finger. “Affect our marriage. I could not forgive myself if I lost this simply because I couldn’t let go of the ghosts of the past. I worry that I will whittle your patience down into nothing; that with each incident I further drain the wellspring of your heart dry.”

“Astarion.” He let her hand go, eyes snapping back to her face. “Listen. When I made my vows, they were made for both the good and the bad. I love you. All of you. That includes this, and whatever other worries you have. I love you-” she poked his chest, “and everything that comes with you, ghosts included. Maybe it will take a century, or five, or maybe it will never fully heal. But either way, I will be here, and I will help you, and protect you, and love you through it all. No matter how many Corinnes come our way.” She poked the tip of his nose. He wrinkled it in response, apparently still unwilling to let his pique go.

“There will be many, Ban. There will always be more. Men and women, everywhere we go. Unwelcome as it is,” and there it was again, the way his eyes scanned her face, “they will keep coming. They will keep seeing you as a trivial obstacle in their path, and they will be wrong, but they will think it and try all the same.”

“And that bothers you, because…”

“Does it not bother you?”

It was her turn to look away. She was silent for a beat. “It does. A lot.”

“Oh, it does?” His mouth showed the beginnings of a small snarl. “You seem wholly unfazed by it. Ban, always the picture of indifference, even as some woman-”

“I wanted to rip her head off! Is that what you want to hear?”

He froze, then the edges of his lips curled into a satisfied smirk. “Precisely that, yes. You never understood, thinking it was the mere desire to own you that ruled me.”

Ban shifted, resting her chin on his sternum. He took a deep breath. “I made mistakes. I sought to keep you in a way that was twisted. But some of it…” he seemed to have finally cooled off, softly stroking her cheek, “...some of it I still feel was valid.”

“Halsin.”

Astarion nodded. “There is… was, a lot of indignation due to the fact that you brought me to his camp, without feeling it necessary to tell me why, or anything else at all, for that matter. That you didn’t respect me, or us, enough to communicate.” He bit his lip, and she shook her head.

“I won’t be mad, or punish you. Please. Keep going.”

“I thought you wished to rekindle whatever you two had, whether it be for a tryst or for something more serious. At the time I said you were not mine to hoard in such a manner, but…”

She felt him tense underneath her, and nuzzled his chest encouragingly. He ran his hands through the back of her hair in silent gratitude.

“You understand that some of what I felt was warranted, do you not?” He searched her face, and she reached up to cup his cheek. “Please.” He shut his eyes. “Tell me you do.”

“I do. The idea that you could be taken from me, even unwillingly… It made me so angry. Just seeing her touch you… I think it finally sank in.” She cleared her throat. “I understand that taking you to Halsin like that was uncalled for, and you deserved better. I handled it especially badly, given the fact that he and I…”

He flapped a hand. “That we have talked about. It was the visit that I’ve never dared bring up.”

“You worried that I’d leave you over it.”

“That, and that you wouldn’t understand.” He opened his eyes again, met hers with a sad smile. He ruffled her hair. “You’ve spent so long bristling under men who sought to own you that you never learned that belonging to someone can also be a beautiful thing. I have been yours throughout our time together, and it has given me nothing but safety, care, and love.”

She stared at him for a long moment. “You… that was legitimately the last thing I expected to hear from you.”

“I spent two centuries learning what it meant to be someone’s property,” he reminded. “Cazador owned me. I belong to you. There’s a vast difference. And you? You are mine.” The last word was growled, and Ban felt heat pool between her legs. He lifted her hand, the one with his ring on it. “Belonging to you is no curse, binding myself to you no hardship. That is what I wish for you to comprehend - that my jealousy is not monstrous, as misguided as my first times feeling it were.”

“You want what we have to be respected. By me, by everyone.”

“And for you to see that I don’t wish to own you, but I do want you to belong to me and only me.”

Ban considered this, considered the venomous fury that had risen in her at the sight of Corrinne pressed against her husband. That rage, the split-second urge to sink fangs into her neck and drink her dry, or break every one of her bones… It had been powerful. It had come after the initial concern for Astarion, of course, but it had been there, surprising her with its intensity.

To belong. Still a bit frightening to her, but she could not deny his words - could not deny the way she’d felt tonight, nor deny the ring on her finger.

“I’m sorry, my love,” she said, the words slipping out with ease, to her relief. “I couldn’t understand it, or even imagine how it would feel, until today.”

Astarion’s tension ebbed, the lines on his face easing as he exhaled. His hand drifted away from her to pick up the book. “Thank you. I think I shall rest easier knowing that.”

“You’ll still be reading, though?” She nodded at the book.

“I’m afraid sleep will come with far less ease than it usually does tonight. Not your fault,” he added quickly.

“Then I’ll keep you company.”

He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, then began to read the book, flicking back a few pages to where he’d actually last understood what his eyes were running over. As he did Ban settled against his sternum, the now-slow beating of his heart lulling her into sleep, much as she fought it.

As she lost the fight and her eyelids drooped shut Astarion watched, amused. He didn’t move her, eyes moving back to his book. It helped that she understood, but he couldn’t help the small pang of worry that niggled at his mind still.

The rite had not fixed him, nor had his marriage. Would time really do so? A foolish thought, he knew, expecting all of his wounds to be healed by a simple ceremony, but part of him had… hoped. It had been largely absent in his mind until today’s painful reminder, and he wished he could have ripped that girl apart for her insolence. Instead he had frozen, mind searching for his wife’s, seeking solace.

He flipped to the next page. None of the words made sense.

And if time failed to heal those wounds, would it one day push them apart? He could almost taste it for a brief moment, the vision filling his mind-

Ban, in her armor and with her weapon slung over her shoulder. Servants hurrying out, bags and bags of her clothes and belongings carried to their carriage. He could see himself on his throne, the house already cold and tomblike, as if it was already mourning her departure. He would have his hands gripping the armrests, digging in until they cracked, resisting the urge to drag her back in, because he refused to do that ever again, even if losing her again would kill him. But every fiber of him would want to.

He would let the flowers wilt, let the palace fall into ruin. He would rot, because there would be nothing else for him, and nothing would matter but her memory. He would wander these empty halls and wait, deluding himself that she’d be back, because she’d come back once, hadn’t she? Perhaps he would seek an end to his misery. Create spawn, unleash whatever chaos he could, hoping someone would lop his miserable head off his shoulders. Perhaps she would. Or perhaps he would find her, beg for her return. She would do so again wouldn’t she, she wouldn’t leave, please, never again-

“Astarion.”

He flinched, looking down at her. She rubbed his chest.

“You were breathing hard. I could hear your heart pounding.” She crawled upwards so that they were eye to eye.

“Oh.” He waved the book at her. “Exciting part came up. It wasn’t all drivel after all.”

She raised an eyebrow, and he exhaled. There would be no way to fool her. “Too many thoughts,” he finally said. “Too many fears, ones that I’m afraid even the sweetest words cannot assuage. There’s no scrying the future, after all.”

“No.” She shook her head. “We can only really see today. And today, you are mine, and you are loved.” She pressed her lips against his, a chaste, gentle kiss that he couldn’t help but deepen. His hand fisted in her hair, gripping hard. The other wrapped around her waist, pressing her against him, his hips grinding against hers, the intent clear.

“Promise me,” he hissed, “that I will always be yours.”

She nodded, but that wasn’t enough. He pulled at her hair, tugging her head back. “Say it.”

“You’re mine,” she growled, slowly moving lower as the hand on her hair guided her downwards. There was a catch in her voice as she said it.

“Don’t hold back,” Astarion snarled, pulling the sheets off them. He could see the simmering anger behind her gaze, held at bay for most of the night, for his sake. “I don't need you to be proper. Show me who I bel- fuck.”

She had grasped his cock, given it a long, slow stroke. His expression softened as she licked along the shaft to the tip. She licked off a bead of precum, savoring the salty, tangy taste that was purely him. Her eyes searched his. “I wasn't sure if I should touch you. If tonight that would be welcome or not. But I'm glad you wanted to. I… I need it too.”

At that she swallowed him down, suckling his head, her tongue swirling in a teasing circle. Bucking helplessly against her, Astarion groaned, hand tightening in her hair. Her fingers stroked the rest of him, her other hand fondled his balls. It felt good - wonderful, even - and much needed, but-

He nudged her then got on his knees, cock proudly jutting out, glistening with her saliva, begging to be sucked. Ban thankfully understood, getting on all fours. He looked at her for a long moment, taking everything in - the swell of her ass, her muscled back and shoulders, her eyes filled with desire for him.

“My sweet Ban. Always eager to please,” he purred.

Her mouth took him in, deeper this time, the sudden return of warmth and suction causing his hips to jerk. He fucked her mouth, leaning back to support himself, hips rolling slowly, soft moans the only sound from his lips. He relished the feel of her swallowing around him, tongue laving its attention on every part of his cock. She was his, and he was hers. He tilted his head back, lost in the ocean of his desire.

Only she would be allowed to touch him like this, to see him like this, to love him like this. She wanted him - but not just that. Loved him. The real him. Not just his face, or his body, or his honeyed words. The true core of him. The good, and the bad, and the pieces he would show no one but her.

He threaded his fingers into her hair once more, enjoying the feeling of holding her while she claimed him. She brought one of her hands up to grip his hip and pull him further down her throat, her nails digging into the side of his ass hard enough to bruise. He let out a loud groan, her forcefulness driving him to the brink.

Hers. He was hers no matter what anyone else said or did, and the way she was swallowing him down right now - not even breathing, just burying him deep into her throat with an aggression he rarely saw from her - told him she also wanted to be reassured of that same fact.

“Show me,” he gasped, lost to the building pressure in his balls, thighs burning, “show me exactly who I belong to, who I give myself to, the only one who will ever make me co-”

She gave him one long, hard suck, tongue flicking against his underside, up to the slit of his cock, her loud moan vibrating against his cockhead, and he came apart, erupting into her mouth with one last hard thrust and a wild, needy groan. She swallowed, humming appreciatively as she did, intensifying his pleasure as her throat pulsed around him. She continued swirling her tongue around his length until he finally pulled out, gasping. Ban sat up, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand, her eyes dark with possessiveness and satisfaction.

“Mine. I promise you that.”

He felt a pleasant shiver run down his spine. He was so relieved she finally understood.

The night passed in relative peace after that, with Ban asleep on his chest as he read. His mind was at ease, and the words on the pages finally made sense.

#astarion #astarion baldurs gate #bg3 #baldurs gate astarion #bg3 astarion #astarion x tav #astarion fic #astarion ancunin #astarion bg3 #bg3 fanfiction #ascended astarion #astarion acunin #astarion romance #astarion x mc #baldurs gate 3 #ascendant astarion #astarion fanfiction #astarion fanfic #soft ascended astarion #ascended astarion x f!tav #ascended astarion x tav #bg3 fanfic #bg3 fic

[holdmytesseract]

Horror movie night with daryl, pre-apocalypse ?

Movie Night

Warnings: pre-apocalypse. fluff? swear words, Merle?

Word Count: blurb

a/n: Pre-apocalypse Daryl is just something else... I love to write him! I really hope you like what I came up with! 🤗

P.S. I just finished two new Daryl stories. So... There's a lot to come your way! 😁

You were just on the way to work; having set foot in the bus five minutes ago, when you felt your phone vibrating inside the pocket of your jeans. Quickly removing your headphones, you fished for the little device. A smile darted across your face at the name on the display.

"Hey, sweetie, what's up?"

"Hey, uh, I didn't wake ya, did I?" The familiar voice of your boyfriend urged to your ears; making you smile. "No, ya didn't. I'm on my way to work." "Now?" He asked kinda confused; presumably checking the time - again. "I thought ya have ta take on the night-shift over the weekend?"

"Uh, yeah, originally that was the plan, but they changed it up again. 'M staying in the early shift the rest of the week. Plus..." Your smile even widened. "... Saturday is my day off now." "Not Tuesday next week?" "Nope - and that means, you could come over Friday evening and we could, I don't know... Watch a movie together and order some pizza?" "Sounds great, sunshine, I-" Suddenly Daryl got interrupted by a voice in the background. A voice you only knew too well... "Stop talkin' to yer girl and get yer lazy ass over here!" Merle.

"I gotta go..." Daryl announced seconds later. "Yeah, sure... You're coming over then?" "I'll try." It was all he said, before he hung up, causing you to roll your eyes. Daryl behaved so different when he was with his brother. The older Dixon was definitely a bad influence - and nobody could convince you otherwise.

You sighed and plucked your headphones back in; switching on your music once more.

You had already made up your mind that Daryl wasn't going to show up. You had learned in the past months not to expect too much of Daryl, when he was with Merle. So, you already decided to change into your pyjama t-shirt and shorts, made yourself a huge bowl of popcorn and flopped on the small sofa in your little apartment to watch a movie alone.

You had just decided on something, when the rather shrill doorbell ripped you out of your thoughts; causing you to flinch.

"Goddammit," you cursed while unwrapping yourself from the cocoon of blankets and jogging to the door.

Slightly out of breath, you pushed down the handle of the door.

"Daryl?" Your jaw dropped; eyes widening as you looked at the redneck across from you. He was wearing his signature orange checkered shirt with the sleeves ripped off and a baggy black jeans; leaning against the door frame with his hands stuffed in his pockets. "I-I thought you couldn't make it?"

He just casually shrugged his shoulders, "I told ya, I'd try..." and gave you a small boyish smile. "'Sides, I wanted to see ya..."

You raised an eyebrow; a smile creeping up your face. You stepped closer to your boyfriend; wrapping your arms around his neck. "Oh, really? Did ya?" Daryl nodded; placing his hands on your hips. "Sure. Merle wasn't happy 'bout me leavin', but I don' care. I ain't letting him forbid me seeing my girl." Your heart fluttered at his words. You smiled even wider and simply pressed a kiss on his lips.

"C'mon then. I almost started without ya." You took his hand and pulled him after you inside your small apartment. Daryl just managed to kick the door shut with his foot. "What were ya goin' to watch?" "Just some kind of trash horror movie." "A trash horror movie, huh?"

You sat down on the sofa with Daryl immediately pulling you onto his lap. "Yep. With zombies, tons of fake blood and very bad acting." "Perfect."

You really enjoyed the time you had with Daryl. It were moments like this, which reminded you that Daryl was not remotely as bad as people told you he would be. No, he was yours and he was the most wonderful thing that happened to you.

"Fuckin' hell, that was the worst movie I've ever seen," the brown haired man stated and shook his head; smiling. You giggled and shifted; removed your legs from his lap and cuddled against his shoulder. "But it was funny and at least a bit scary." He nodded. "Yeah, I give ya that." Daryl wrapped an arm around you; pulling you closer.

"Thank you for being here. With me." Your boyfriend smiled another genuinely happy smile. "I'll always be, sunshine."

Tags: @suniloli @stitchintimefan @in-this-minute @wolfsmom1 @loz-3 @fictive-sl0th @fuseburner @mandywholock1980 @celtic-crossbow @lou12346789 @mischief-dream @km-ffluv @buttercupcookies-blog @crimson25 @salvinaa @javagirl328 @sweetz1919

#campfire sleepover #2k follower celebration #daryl dixon #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon fanfic #daryl dixon the walking dead #daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon x you #daryl dixon x y/n

[hwaightme]

My star

(masterlist)

⭐ pairing: bf!idol!seonghwa x gn!reader ⭐ genre: comfort, fluff, established long-term relationship, long distance ⭐ summary: many miles might separate you, but they mean nothing when your heart is with him, and his heart is with you. ⭐ wordcount: 2.3k total ⭐ warnings/tags: sfw, semi-edited, horrifically self-indulgent, longing/missing someone, matchy-matchy type of couple, balanced relationship, safe spaces, communication, heart eyes, stress/tiredness, rumination, unconditional love, comfort, being vulnerable, odd sleep patterns, lmk if anything else ⭐ taglist: at the bottom of the fic ⭐ a/n: seonghwa <3 i hope this brings comfort to anyone who reads <3 reblogs, thoughts and feelings appreciated. much love!

Some days were easier than others. Wrapped up in the hustle and bustle, sinking into meetings, letting yourself get carried away by projects. Some days it was easier to forget, at least for a moment, the hollowness that persecuted you with ever-growing vigour. Concealing sentimentality and melancholia, you skillfully navigated your life until you could hide away, and in the comfort of your own, empty apartment, allowed yourself to curl up into a ball in your bed and wonder why it was that some days were like the flutter of a butterfly’s wings, while others, like a viscous putrid tar.

Today was one of those days. On edge, impatient and begging for a break, you stumbled over yourself as you counted down the seconds until you could be painfully alone. The hurt had become your best friend amidst all the changes, and you wanted nothing more than to drown in it when the times got tough. Accumulating short ends of a variety of sticks even when things were going well, you were caged in the creativity of your turbulent mind. You did not need enemies, being your own best one. 

Normally, coming home would be enough. It just so happened that you had the cure, the relief, the peace, who would stand and wait for you with open arms. You called yourself blessed - you well and truly were. In a world that was stuffed with defeat and enemies, you had someone who was always on your team. Without words, without explanation, you would be soothed. There was no need to ever dwell on complexities and tear into negativities - they all evaporated after the keeper of your heart, your starlight would embrace you. But when only the echo bouncing off the walls was there to greet your shattered presence, whatever had been gnawing at your defences would draw blood and turn into a brutal torturer.

You slid off your shoes, moving exclusively by inertia left over from powering through your commute. After washing your hands, you decided to forgo the kitchen, ambling towards the bedroom that you had gotten so used to sharing. Ghostly, dim, exhausted interiors that would glow whenever he was around. You touched the switch on the floor lamp, hesitating for a second before remembering what you had been told before - if your own sun wasn’t shining too bright, turn on all the bulbs around you until you believed the same could be done to you. Was the room always this dark?

It was impossible to say when you fell asleep. At some point after changing out of your office wear and into your pyjamas, which consisted of a half-hearted combination of tracksuit bottoms and a t-shirt, along with a hoodie which your boyfriend had made a point to leave for you, you ended up crawling onto the bed, only just managing to lift the sheets and snuggling under into a somewhat comforting huddle of cotton before darkness enveloped you. Was Seonghwa asleep? Was he awake? Has he been eating well, working and relaxing in balance? Questions flooded your mind as your bleary eyes attempted to blink away your sleepiness. At this point, you were not quite sure if it was a mere physical state, the heaviness of your eyelids having become near-chronic.

He was out there, under the same sky, seeing it in slightly different shades, but he was out there. Was he lonely too? Hopefully no negative thoughts plagued him. Seonghwa deserved better. But… you could not help but listen to the little selfish worm in your mind - did he miss you? You could not deny that a part of you did long for the sensation of being missed by him. A lot. You clenched the edges of your, or technically his, sleeves and sighed. Pulling the hood over your head, you shut your eyes, trying to picture the last time you embraced the love of your life. How warm it had been. How safe. Washing away all the anxiety, all the pins and needles of stagnancy that came with unwelcome solitude. How he would say he was proud of you, and how you would be able to sit with him and listen to him talk about his day, running a hand through his soft, tousled locks. You have always been a listener. But what was there to listen to now, except the roaring waves of rumination?

What time was it where Seonghwa was? One quick unlock of the phone that you fished out from under the covers brought you the dual clock that you put on your home screen, and along with it, the realisation that you had slept through the entire evening, and through the majority of the night. Again. He was probably settling down, lying on his bed in the hotel room and playing Animal Crossing. Or did he find something else? Did he have the time and energy to play? Or perhaps there was another schedule that had crept up on your boyfriend out of the blue… You mused in total silence while inspecting the background you had set - a picture from a date some weeks ago. Right before work summoned him to leave once more, and you were left standing by the window, watching as his silver suitcase disappeared in the back of a minivan. Rolling over onto your back, your eyes travelled to the skylight - another companion that attempted to soothe your loud mind with vistas and ever changing colour palettes of the universe above. The skies had been clear yesterday, and you wished that it was the case over there, where he was, too.

Your fingers moved on their own accord, opening the messaging app you two preferred to use, flicking through his and your barrage of back and forth texts, videos, photos, voice messages… a little life in the digital space. It would be a lie if you said there was little communication. In fact, if anything, you knew almost all the details about his activities, him gushing to you about whatever he could, and smiling sheepishly when something had to be kept a business secret. You were proud of him, most certainly. If only you could say this face to face. Then, for a short while, nothing would exist except you, him and endless conversation about everything and nothing as you would be entangled in one another, cuddling on the couch as some drama you two picked would be inevitably forgotten. A new message startled you out of your dream, immediately followed by another, and another that made you scroll all the way back.

> i just found your favourite ice cream at a store here!!!

> oh?

> love i can see you are in chat… are you awake :(((

With a quick turn, you stretched and flicked on the lamp on the bedside table, deeming the still-on floor lamp no longer sufficient. Wriggling upwards so you could hold your phone vertically, you pondered how you could write a message that did not sound too desperate. You were perfectly well aware that Seonghwa did not mind a little bit of clinginess - in fact, you had had a dedicated conversation early on in your relationship about affection and he had reassured you numerous times that, especially when on tour, he adored, and reciprocated that fondness and longing. But nonetheless, the annoying bugs that lived in your head and littered it with doubt and anxiety made you want to pull back and pretend like you were unaffected. And so, you kept on writing, and deleting. Writing and deleting. Until Seonghwa took the lead and messaged you again.

> call?

> i’m in my room

> [my star <3 sent 1 image]

The ghost of a smile danced over your lips when the picture loaded - an adorable duck pout, face incredibly close to the camera, but still giving enough space for you to be able to spot the backdrop - a painting, completed in spectacularly bland tones, that served as a prime example of how the hotel where your boyfriend was staying favoured ‘stock footage’-core, if you were to borrow his words. Your gaze could not leave the picture. Your silly, precious Seonghwa, pretty inside and out. On its own accord, your hand moved upwards until it hit ‘video call’, and simultaneously ignited a sudden nervousness. What if now was not really a good time? What if Seonghwa was tired and your less than cheerful disposition would only weigh him down?

“Hello lovely… ah, I see we are matching- wait let me make the light brighter-” you watched as he played with a remote, clicking through and checking his appearance on the screen until he gave a victorious giggle, and pointed at the hoodie, “see?”

“You look so cute and cosy, Hwa… And hello to you too,” you mumbled, settling into a more relaxed position.

“I should be saying that to you, you are literally huddled in bed…”

“Join me,” you suggested, half joking, half hoping that he would play along. Clearly you were long past playing guessing games with each other, as almost instantly, Seonghwa was rushing to his bed, rolling into a burrito until only the top half of his face was peeking out. For the first time in a while, you chuckled. 

“You come here often?” he wiggled his eyebrows before squishing his face into the pillow, only to turn it back to you again, a mixture of worry and love in his eyes, “...can’t sleep, angel?”

“Hmm… if anything I might have just accidentally slept too much.”

“Ah…” both of you knew all the reasons for your behaviour. The same exact ones that prompted your boyfriend to overfill his suitcase with trinkets and clothes that he could sense you would like, or that reminded him of you. Understanding washed over you both as you quietly regarded one another through the phone screens. In moments like these, the many miles that divided you appeared so miniscule that it was agonising.

It was impossible to reach out and brush back the strand of hair that was threatening to poke his eye. It was impossible to fall into a dreamless slumber while listening to his calm, soothing heartbeat. It was impossible to gingerly squeeze his hand - an unspoken ‘I love you’, while floating in his starry eyes. But nothing in the world could take away the sincerity. The promises that turned into actions. This was your person, and you were his. As you studied Seonghwa, you felt the frustration, the pent up rage, the fatigue start to evaporate, leaving behind only a soft cloudlike fuzziness. A crush that would never go away, no matter how many years you would be together. He was your clarity, and with him it was the easiest thing in the universe to look at your troubles once again and see that you could take them on. No challenge on your path could hurt you. Not when he made you feel invincible, and even just by being present, reminded you of how you were simply priceless.

“So… tell me about the ice cream,” you tried, your voice sounding a little raspy. Seonghwa’s face, which had previously been painted over with concern, turned into the brightest sunlight. He beamed, and launched into a detailed recollection of what to anyone else would be beyond mundane. Not to you. Never to you. Never about your lovely star.

As he moved just a fraction, forcing the hoodie to glide forwards and expose more of his collarbones, you noticed that he was wearing the necklace you had gotten together - a two-piece set. Instinctively, your hand moved to feel for the chain that adorned your own neck. Two lego pieces that when put together formed a heart. The epitome of sickeningly sweet couple cooing, but it ended up being the best representation of you both. Unbeknownst to yourself you smiled even wider as the piece grew more prominent against his skin whenever it caught the light that enveloped his room in a warm optical lullaby. The change in your expression evidently did not go unnoticed, as Seonghwa paused, and with a light smirk, sat up to let the light cast wondrous shadows on his features. It was probably silly, how deep you had fallen for him, and how obvious it was, no matter what you did and how you acted. All he had to do was turn his head or say the word, and you would come running all these thousand miles to do anything at all. Really, what was stopping you?

Maybe the fact that someone had to water your boyfriend's beloved pet moss. Or that you had committed yourself to dusting and keeping the apartment pristine despite not being fond of the activity. Or, well, your own life, of course. If anything, your boyfriend would be most distressed if you gave up on yourself. As Seonghwa continued his monologue, now having moved onto discussing the next group activities and travels, you realised you had much to do. Much to work and live for. Distance or not, you were with him. And the least you could do was to balance and maintain a smitten hopefulness. With a partner like Seonghwa, who stopped to check the countdown on his phone to announce that it was only ‘a week, five days, and sixteen hours’ until he would take you to one of the many restaurants he had marked out in the city, you were safe to love hard. Forever and always. And could, in fact, live easy, knowing that while your heart was out there conquering arena after arena, stadium after stadium, his heart was right here with you. Your star with whom you could fearlessly conquer the dark, and celebrate the shimmering dots of happiness that decorated your cosmic canvas. Your story. You and him.

⭐ perma-taglist: @shakalakaboomboo @charreddonuts @miriamxsworld @innsomniacshinestar @foxinnie8 @preciouswoozi @wooyoungjpg @wowie-hockey @hongjoongs-patience @jaehunnyy @maddkitt @ren-junwrld @pyeonghongrie-main @marsstarxhwa @yeooclock @yeonjunnie @asjkdk @lucky-cat-cafe @northerngalxy @my-loves-my-life @http-gyu

enjoyed? do consider reblogging <3 thank you, all the love <3

#kflixnet #k-labels #cromernet #seonghwa fluff #ateez fluff #seonghwa x reader #seonghwa x y/n #seonghwa x you #seonghwa comfort #park seonghwa x reader #park seonghwa fluff #seonghwa imagines #ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #kpop writing #kpop writers #seonghwa scenarios #ateez au #seonghwa au #ateez #park seonghwa #ateez imagine #ateez headcanons #seonghwa #seonghwa healing #seonghwa angst #seonghwa fanfic #ateez seonghwa

[keyofjetwolf]

So I ran the 5k this weekend.

By which I mean I walked the 5k.

This was my first "race". I signed up in January-ish, as a way to help motivate me to get my shit together, healthy-speaking. It didn't work. Or, rather, I didn't work.

I've fallen way off my path toward some modicum of health and fitness. I missed some major goals and was furious with and disgusted in myself. Rather than use that as a stick to encourage me forward however, I beat myself into the ground with it. HI HELLO WELCOME TO OUR SAME OLD TIRED BULLSHIT THIS IS ALWAYS SO HELPFUL TO US. But I varied it up! Since I no longer really have the luxury of being a perpetual sad sack, dragging my failures up on stage to consistently, cruelly, delightfully abuse myself with and about, I shoved it all into a box in the corner and ignored it. Problem solved!

Except of course that included focusing on, you know, SOLUTIONS. Ignoring a thing literally never solved the thing, and I knew that, and kept resurfacing and poking and needling, but I am like Olympic-level procrastination sometimes, and kept punting it down the road. "That's a problem for Future Jet Wolf, and I hate that cunt, fuck her!" is a joke I make often and laugh at always, but of course eventually Future Jet Wolf becomes Now Jet Wolf and there's no more road, just a big ol' ball of problems kicked right smack in the middle of my confused, startled gob. What?? Who could have possibly foreseen??!

So it was when the 5k arrived. I didn't want to do it. In the days leading up, my brain -- cunning hateful bitch she can be -- started whispering all the extremely logical and justifiable reasons excuses to not. "Yeah," I agreed, "but we gotta."

The whisper reached full on panicked crescendo yesterday morning. I don't know if it was self-sabotage, or just the universe having its usual fun, but everything went wrong. I couldn't find my shirt and shorts, buried somewhere in the piles of clean clothes I have yet to put away (another club wielded with great effectiveness before the day was out). By the time I dug up replacements, I was late in the shower, thus late out the door. I grabbed my watch and my headphones, but despite never having difficulty before, could get neither to work. I drove the wrong way and twisted myself around getting to the park where the race was to start. When I finally arrived, I couldn't tell where we were to gather. There were participants everywhere, walking about, but no central gathering that I could see. Signs were posted, but sporadically, and to my eyes, random and contradictory. The race was moments from starting.

I want to say I brushed all this aside without effort, that I bravely and confidently pressed onward and sorted things out. I want to say that. What actually happened is I found a quiet and -- jesus wept, I hope it was -- hidden spot and cried for a minute. Maybe two. Reasons Excuses formed on my lips and they tasted sweet. Hell, if I spun this right, it would be HILARIOUS. Another "Oh, that Theodore Nickels!" story. We would tell it around the Shabbat table and have a grand laugh.

I've not yet found my way to any point of pride in this overlong and deeply unflattering tale, but if I get there, it's likely in this moment, where I wiped my face on my shirt, pushed away from the wall, and resumed my search for the starting line.

Then I was there. The race was to begin at 9:45, not 9:30 like I thought, so I had a solid ten minutes. Got my watch rebooted. Found the headphone manual online and successfully powered it up. When the race began, I took one step forward, then another. 51 minutes later, I crossed the finish line. I had completed my first race.

I was deeply, violently disappointed in myself. The vitriol began immediately. What a pathetic effort. Humiliating. Barely a fraction of what what Doc and Mike accomplished, and done excruciatingly poorly at that. Shameful, laughable, grotesque, thesaurus.com etc etc blah blah blah. On and on, all goddamn day, until I found it as boring as I did upsetting.

PLUS SIDE: the more it goes on, the easier it gets to ignore a constant hateful drone.

LEGIT HILARIOUS ATTEMPT AT BONUS POINTS: my brain seized my lack of creativity in ongoing self-abuse and added that to the evidence list of my suckage BABYGIRL I CANNOT TAKE YOU SERIOUSLY RIGHT NOW ARE YOU FOR FUCKING REAL

Right, then, so what the fuck? If it were literally anybody but myself, I'd be cheering them on. YOU DID THE THING. Doing the thing is objectively more accomplished than NOT doing the thing. What did I realistically expect? That I'd take top prize in the first race I'd ever done with a preparation level I'd managed to sink into the negative? And would that have even mattered? What result would have appeased? What achievement would translate to victory?

24 hours later, I still don't really have answers. It might be pent up derision at myself for that previous goal-failure and backslide which I'm now directly confronting instead of ignoring. It might be some weird twisted preservation thing of the "you can't fail if you don't try" flavour of bullshittery. It might be the desperation of a destructive streak unwilling to allow improvement without a vicious bloody battle. All of this? At the very least, I think, some.

I forget, sometimes, more times than I'd like, that the meds don't fix everything, they simply keep the shit I can't control at bay so I can focus on the work. Work's still gotta be done, kiddo. That's on you.

Last night, I registered for my next 5k.

I'll definitely remember how to turn on my headphones. One improvement, NAILED. Not sure what #2 will be, but I've got three weeks. Time for work.

#life with jet wolf

[selfloverrrrrr]

can you please write a fic about female reader non-conning megumi? thank you in advance!

Shy...huh?~

Warning: smut, heavy smut, noncon, unprotected sex, bullying, Yandere, obsession, shy boy Megumi, obsessed reader.....

( All characters are aged up/18+)

Masterlist

Minors Do Not Interact

Read the warnings carefully....if you don't like my stories block me not report

Megumi Fushiguro. The shy guy of jujutsu high. He was handsome af... Who can say he's not good looking? But he was so shy. He doesn't even talk that much. Me, Yuji and Nobara were his only friends. He didn't knew... actually nobody knew I liked him. I'm obsessed with him. And I stalked him...

It was a normal night going on. I knocked Megumi's door. He opened the door after a few minutes. "O-oh ,y/n... You here?" He asked with shaking voice. "Yeah....umm actually... I was trying to sleep...but you know Nobara and Yuji are our for a mission.... So I thought maybe we could watch movies or something" I said. "Oh...umm...y-yeah... it's okey " he said and let me in. 'this can be the chance ' I thought.

We were on his bed watching TV and talking with each other.... The time passed. "y-you want anything?" He asked shyly. I looked at him. " Yes...." I replied. "What?" He asked. "You" I replied. "H-Huh?... I don't understand what you said" he said. I brought my face closer to him and said"I want you " I grabbed his hands and pinned them down . "W-what are you d-doing?" He asked with fear. I sit on his lap. Fear got him by his neck. "Don't be scared.... I'm not gonna hurt you!" I said . I trailed down my hand from chest to his clothed erection. "What do you want???" He asked me with sceared voice. "You....as mine" I replied and started unzipping his pant.

"S-stop" he said. I pulled down his pant and started undoing his shirt. "P-please stopppp....why are you doing this?" he asked. I could hear his breath uneven from fear. " I don't like when other girls look at you " I said while rubbing my hand on his boxer on his erection. His breath hitched. " You are mine.... I hate when those girls of our class looks at you " I said tugging on his boxer. "I don't know... I really don't know what you're saying" he replied. " I don't like when someone stares at something which is mine" I said and pulled down his boxer.

"PLEASE.... Please stop.... please stop" he begged. Tears started forming in his eyes. I grabbed his dick and started stroking it. He squeezed his eyes shut. "What if you want to give someone else what's mine???" I whispered. "I won't...I promise I won't... please just stop... I'm begging you" he said. Tears started falling from his eyes. I licked his chest and bite on his nipple. I heard him groaned at that. I smirked.

I went down to the level of his dick and put it in my mouth. He moaned loudly. I started rubbing my tongue around his dick. His dick was too big. Barely fitting in my mouth. I stroked the rest with my hand. I sucked on his tip harshly and pull out his dick with a 'pop'. I looked at it. His tip became so red I had barely done anything yet. When I pulled out his dick his hips automatically bucked upwards... seeking for release. I smirked at that.

I went up and cupped his chin with my one hand. "Are you a virgin?" I asked. He just looked at me with teary eyes. I tighten my grip on his chin. "I asked you something" I said. He nooded. Tears still falling from his eyes. I smirked. "That means I can make you mine" I said and took off my skirt and pantie. His eyes widened. I lined my entrance with his dick "Please please please y/n please..... I'm begging you.... I don't want this... please....I don't want this" he sobbed. I went down and we both moaned loudly.

I started riding him. Going as fast as I can. We both were moaning like sluts. Noone could ever imagine that his dick could be that long. His dick was touching the deepest parts inside me. I knew I couldn't hold it long. He was still struggling and sobbing and babbling words like 'please stop ' ' I don't want this ' etc. My pussy clenched around him and he moaned out so loudly. After a few minutes we both came together. Megumi became so weak he fell on the bed and I fell on top of him. We both breathing heavily.

"I love you so much.... I love you more than anyone...." I whispered in his ear and kissed his cheek.

Give me your requests guys....

I love when you give me your requests 💕

#jjk #smut #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #tw noncon #fem reader #jujutsu kaisen megumi #fushiguro megumi #megumi smut #yandere megumi #megumi fushiguro #jjk megumi #megumi x reader #jujutsu megumi #megumi noncon

[whorediaries-09]

Hi babes💓

May I ask for a French!Slytherin!fem X Sirius???

Could be angsty and slowburnish or whatever you'd like really [I'm a sucker for your smut]

I love you xxx

thank you for sending in the request, luv!!

i'm gonna make you my wife;

pairing- sirius black x frenchslytherin!reader warning(s)- banter, fluff, silly teenagers in love, kinda shy reader, alcohol, 18+ content. a/n- also sorry for poorly translated french, i used whatever google gave me hehe.

ps- i didn't write the day old cliche about slytherin reader and sirius in this one because i think i have read it so much, it doesn't inspire me anymore.

little train.

it was the most annoying noise. the way sirius black was sucking on the lollipop vibrated in your eardrums. in the quiet silence of the library, the constant swishing, flicking and sucking was deafeningly annoying.

more over, you didn't understand why he was here, of all places. and why he couldn't understand the meaning of personal boundaries. so you decided to voice your thought.

'black, move your ass away, will you?' sirius looked at you as if he'd noticed you were standing near him, struggling to get the book out which was kept on one of the higher shelves. while he could've easily gotten it out, it was fun to see you struggle, as the shirt that you had carefully tucked into your skirt loosened with every movement. it didn't really help with the fact that your skirt also rid up slightly as you stood on your tiptoes, exposing the skin of your thighs.

'why good morning, love, i see you're thinking about my ass today.'

'trust me, i've got better things to do, black. and don't call me love.' you warned. sirius seemed greatly amused. he moved closer to you, his breathe falling upon your hair. he could easily tower over you.

'then what would you like me to call you? sweetheart? honey? or maybe you'd prefer princess?' he didn't miss the way your lips quirked but you preferred to stay silent. he smiled, apparently satisfied with your reaction. he leaned closer, his finger tucking your hair behind your back. his lips almost brushed with your ear as he whispered, handing you the book you'd been reaching for,

'ou peut-être préféreriez-vous que je vous appelle mon amour.' ('or maybe you'd prefer me to call you my love.')

he didn't miss the way your eyes flicked to his lips. or the way your cheeks reddened at his words. or the way your pupils dilated, if only slightly. grinning, he held a two finger salute, walking away,

'see you at the game tomorrow! can't wait to beat the slytherins!'

'va te faire foutre, black,' ('fuck you, black,') you whispered as he walked away.

*-

it was cold. the air was harsh, biting your skin with every bellow. but as the enthusiastic quidditch fan you were, you had to go. well you'd be lying if you said you were the enthusiastic quidditch fan, you couldn't give more than two shits about it, you solemnly went to support your team.

at least that is what you told yourself.

it was again, a lie.

you wrapped the scarf around your neck closer, hiding yourself further into the soft and knitted wool. through the wind, you watched sirius throw a particularly nasty throw at evan. and try as hard as you might, you couldn't bring yourself to tear your eyes off from his form.

it was quite the show, every time he shouted at somebody else, every time his fingers wrapped around the ball, pulling it closer to his body and throwing it about with the club. you'd be lying too much if you said you didn't find that weirdly attractive.

but what would a few lies do?

you were pulled out your thoughts as you saw sirius approach closer, closer than he was supposed to during a game. he was grinning full ear to ear. you quickly diverted your eyes to the score board.

'enjoying the view, mon amour?' he shouted. you rolled your eyes,

'you wish, black,' he chuckled,

'you know i don't,'

*-

sirius knew what he wanted. and he knew how to get it. so, as he watched you sit down for a game of spin the bottle at the party, he sat strategically directly opposite to you. the rest of his group cheered as he was handed a shot of tequila. you rolled your eyes, as he cheered the air.

'not so cheerful today are we, mon amour?' (my love)

'it's never cheerful with you around, black,'

'you wound me, chérie,' (darling)

'i sure hope i do,' he chuckled, running his fingers through his hair. he took the bottle, placing it on the carpet. with a wide grin, he said, overly cheerful,

'lets get this game going shall we?' he spun the bottle. everybody stayed silent, watching as it turned in circles, before slowing down every passing minute and halting to a stop.

it pointed at evan and barty. barty smirked, evan groaned. the rest cheered barty on. he got on all fours, reaching towards evan,

'pick your choice, rosier,' he said. the other boy grumbled something incomprehensible before pulling him close and kissing him. the way he kissed him didn't seem very rivals of them.

'oi! get a fucking room!' james shouted, throwing a chip at them. barty pulled himself off evan's lips.

'i will potter, just not within the spectrums of your knowledge,' the boy blew a raspberry before grabbing the bottle and spinning it. it spun again. you hoped it wouldn't stop at you. you didn't want to have to kiss sirius. and neither did you want to have to drink the tequila.

you didn't have a very good experience with alcohol.

it stopped at james and lily. it was no rumor lily had finally said yes to the boy after years of unnerved dedication to pester her. but james had to change into a matured and good youth of course, before he'd finally gotten lily to fall in love with him. lily leaned over, but james being the over excited fellow he was, pulled her into a frenzy, smacking a hard kiss on her lips.

'james, we don't want to become uncles at this young age, bless us!' remus said, dryly. he seemed thoroughly bored. on second thought, he always appeared bored. it was just him, you supposed, not finding the thrill into these games. he much rather preferred rotting in bed with a book.

'i agree with remus,' peter piped in, taking the bottle. sirius' eyes lingered upon you. he could see the feign worry etched on your face. he thought it was adorable how oblivious you were at hiding your feelings.

he saw the whispers in your eyes.

'spin the fucking bottle.' you said.

and so peter did. when it stopped, so did your heart. well almost. sirius looked at you with the biggest grin you'd ever seen on his face. you huffed.

'pick your poison, babe,' he said. he didn't lean over. it was all part of his strategy.

'you're poison either way.' you said, taking the shot burning down your throat. he grinned, shrugging his shoulders.

je vais faire de toi ma femme. he thought. (i'm gonna make you my wife.)

je vais casser ton vélo. you thought. (i'm gonna smash up your bike.)

*-

you were high. and god forbid you didn't care about sirius' hands around your body. you allowed yourself to relish the feeling. the warmth your heart sunk as his breath fanned over your neck. his hands felt so familiar on your skin, as you'd felt them before.

the music crawled under your skin. he swirled you around, his hand placed on your waist, pressing your chest to his.

'i'm gonna get you one day, miel,' (honey) he said. you chuckled, dancing with unrhythmic steps.

'je vais te dire une chose, miel. je pourrais retourner ce putain de scénario et prendre le dessus, et te laisser comme cette stupide fête. ou je pourrais juste t'aimer jusqu'à la fin.' (i'll tell you one thing, honey. i might flip the fucking script and take the upper hand, and leave you like this dumb party. or i might just love you till the end.)

sirius laughed. it vibrated into your ears. it was a melody, a sweet vibratos of rasps from the depth of his throat. and god forbid it got you feeling things you'd never thought you'd feel.

'et je vais te dire une chose, bébé. je vais faire de toi ma putain de femme.' (and i'll tell you one thing, babe. i'm gonna make you my fucking wife)

you chuckled.

'et je briserai ton putain de vélo.' (and i'm gonna smash your fucking bike)

he dipped you, before swirling you for the last time and leaving you.

'i'll wait, sweetheart.'

*-

you didn't know whether you wanted to flip him off or pull him into the closet. but the whispers in his eyes were so loud, so lewd, it was as if you could hear them echo into your head. why was he sitting with the group to play truth and dare anyway?

worser still, it was a rapid fire if you chose truth.

'lace, satin or leather,' peter asked.

'that's the most most stupid question to ask the fucking sirius black leather! the guy's wearing a leather jacket in front of your eyes!'

'lace,' he said.

'we were not talking about lingerie.' lily commented, bored.

'i am,' he shrugged.

fuck. it was your turn. he grinned. without thinking, you chose truth. and god by the look on his face you knew he'd make it hard.

'tell us about any three kinks you have.' you almost choked on your pumpkin juice. your brain short circuited. kinks? you'd only had sex one time.

'fast, chérie, time is money,'

'uhm, may-maybe mirrors, oral and biting,'

he clearly saw through your lie, but made no further comment.

*-

'i see you can't stand us having a jolly time, black,' your friend commented as sirius sat down with your group. sirius grinned at her.

'if you want to, take away your girlfriend,' she grumbled. you hit her with your book. exactly why sirius black to sit amongst your group of friends, was extremely questionable. if you knew better, sirius black would've rather died than having been spotted at the slytherin table.

'she's not my girlfriend, yet,' he replied.

'and i'm never gonna be your girlfriend!' you snapped. he grinned,

'so we're going straight for husband and wife, mon amour?' you stuttered upon your words. he enjoyed the effect he had on you. he smiled, leaning closer, resting his face on his palm. you rolled your eyes.

'marry, kiss or kill me, ladies?' he asked. your friends groaned, each on of them mumbling a quiet 'kill'. sirius seemed thoroughly amused when you didn't say anything.

'it's just a game but really,' he said, urging you to answer. you smiled, a sly curve of your lips, so unlike you,

'i'm betting on all three, for us.'

this time, sirius black was left speechless.

*-

you were late. running towards slughorn's class wasn't the best option, considering it was down in the dungeon, where the floor tended to be slippery, but it was the second best option considering apparition was not possible within the grounds of hogwarts. not to say, you'd been used to the slippery floors after spending 6 and a half years in the castle.

but just as you were turning on your heel, a few steps away into his class, you were pulled by somebody who's touch seemed eerily familiar. their hand clasped upon your mouth, as they pressed your back towards their front, pulling you into a broom closet-which you didn't even know was there.

inky locks licked your forehead. the warmth of his body pressed upon yours and the ink of the fresh tattoos on his hand instantly gave away who it was.

'i hope you don't mind that i kidnapped you,' he rasped, letting you go once he was sure you wouldn't scream and let the whole school know where you were.

'i in fact do mind, black,' you said, reaching for the handle of the closet. he held your free hand, pulling you back,

'there's slime all over the floor. it's for snivellus. i hope you don't want to get stuck on it.' he said, warning you. you didn't answer, letting go the handle.

'it's too small in here,' you commented. he quirked an eyebrow, smiling wickedly,

'i think its cozy in here,' you rolled your eyes.

'push the reset button, babe, let's become something new,'

'no offence but god how do you talk so much. i think i die a little inside every time you open your stupid mouth. sometimes i just want to wrap my hand around your throat and choke you till you can't speak anymore,'

'that sounds kinky,' his reply took you off guard. 'are we discussing kinks in this closet? i don't think i'll be able to handle myself once i get to know about-'

his voice was muffled when you crashed your lips against his, pulling him down my his red tie. for a minute millisecond, he didn't kiss you back, and you thought you'd fucked it up. but when he smiled and pushed you back on the wall, his hands cradling your cheeks, you knew you lost it. your knees suddenly became very weak and your heart started thumping against your throat.

you could only hope you'd crawl out of this closet even alive. because the way he kissed you, so deep, so passionate, yet so rough had you losing your breathe.

'f-fuck black, i can't breathe,' you gasped, getting away from him. he smiled, slyly.

'had no idea you'd got so much in you, mon amour,' he said, his hands travelling between your thighs. he crawled his fingers upon the skin of your inner thigh, enjoying the way you crumbled bit by bit with every movement. his finger grazed over your underwear, feeling the little wet spot.

'may i?' he asked, his pupils dilated. you sighed, pulling him closer by the collar.

'god all you do is fucking talk, please,' he laughed, deep from the base of the throat.

'and all you do is hate me,' he slipped his fingers into your underwear, rubbing circles on your clit.

'you're so fucking wet,' you hummed, letting him scissor his fingers into your cunt. your walls pulsated at the cold contact of his rings into the warmth of your folds. you shuddered, his free hand undoing the buttons of your shirt.

'i'll mark you in places only i can see,' he whispered, his lips trailing over the expanse of your warm skin of your breasts. with a swish and click of his fingers, gone was your bra. he kissed your breasts gently, enjoying as you heaved hotly within his contact. you didn't think he had the right to be so outrageously good at this.

the last and the only time you'd had sex was not like this. it couldn't have been like this, you had not even orgasmed.

the rumors weren't wrong after all. sirius black knew shit. the way he toyed with you, leaving you shaking and desperate for him, just on his fingers drove you to fucking hell.

'god, you're so hot,' he whispered, pulling out his fingers, leaving you stranded, without the pleasure of climax. you whined. he grinnned.

'come on, tell me what you want,'

'you know what i want,'

'i happen to be a twat. i actually have no idea what you want,' he said, his wrapping his lips around the fingers that had been inside you not even a minute ago. you groaned, tugging at his collar, brushing his lips against yours,

'i need you to fuck me, black.' he grinned, crashing his lips with yours, picking you up, wrapping your legs around his waist. your fingers nimbly undid his zip, pulling out his cock. you pumped him in your hand before he lifted up your skirt, pushing himself inside of you.

he nudges his forehead with you, as you try to stifle your moans when he thrusts.

'mon Dieu, tu vas me ruiner, black,' (god, you're gonna ruin me, black,') he laughs silently, throwing his head back when your walls pulsate around him.

'je n'ai pas l'intention de le faire, chérie.' (i don't plan to, darling.')

your thighs shake around him, as you pull him closer, as if you want to crawl under his skin. his hand crawls on your torso, as he kisses, bites and licks every bit of bare skin he can find.

'attagirl, taking me so well,'

you groan.

'f-fuck, i'm gonna cum,' you say. he fastens his pace erratically, the tip of his cock hitting spots that made you see stars.

'Ouais? Dis mon nom. crie-le.' (yeah? say my name. scream it.') you groan, rolling your eyes and curling your toes as you feel yourself topple on the edge of insanity.

'f-fuck, black please,' he wraps his hand around your throat, forcing you to look at him,

'Non? regarde-moi, crie mon nom.' (no? look at me, scream my name.') and so you do. you crumble completely as the words spill from his mouth, heaving and clashing when you feel your orgasm hit.

'sirius- sirius- fuck!' he grinned, thrusting into you erratically, chasing his own high. you squeezed around him, as he toppled over the edge, rushing thick white hot ropes of cum into you, before pulling out. the sticky mixture flowed down your thighs. he rubbed his fingers onto the skin of your thighs. with his thumb, he parted your lips, placing his wet fingers on your tongue.

'taste,' he demanded. you wrapped your lips around his fingers, licking tasting the both of you on his fingers. and you saw the lust fade from his eyes, as he pecked you sweetly on your lips. and god forbid it drove you crazy.

how could have just leave you shaking and treat you like fragile glass within a few seconds?

'so would you want to go on a date with me sometime?' you smiled, devilishly,

'i'd rather smash up your bike, sirius black,' he grinned back, showing his pearly white teeth.

'and i'll make you my wife.'

**************************

taglist - @reggieisfit @siriuslycaptainofthedawntreader @jamespottergf @eternallybipanicking @fictional-magic @iamgayforyourmom1510

(if you want to be tagged please send a request through my inbox.)

FOLKS THE LAST DIALOGUE IS SARCASTIC BETWEEN THE READER AND SIRIUS!!

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#harry potter fanfiction #harry potter #marauders #sirius black #sirius x reader #sirius black smut #the marauders #sirius black x reader #sirius black imagine #marauders era #sirius black thoughts #sirius black x oc #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black fanart #sirius being sirius #sirius black fluff #sirius black angst #fanfiction #james & peter & remus & sirius

[waywardserpent176389053]

Natsuki's Doki Doki Panic

So, I wrote this awhile ago and thought it would be a good idea to post it here as well. I'll upload the other chapters in the next few days.

Anyway here is chapter one.

The Clubroom Incident.

Natsuki woke up tired. Groaning, she forced herself out of bed and moved to get dressed. Lately she had been getting more and more exhausted, worn out by simple day to day effort. Natsuki had already stayed home from school a few times, but she was falling behind on class work and had to study for the big test. Besides, today was Literature Club and Natsuki wouldn’t miss it if her life depended on it.

As she put her shirt on a spike of pain lanced though her chest. This had also started happening recently, and it bothered her even more than the exhaustion. Natsuki rubbed her sternum, was something wrong with her heart? No, it couldn’t be, she was young and healthy. Natsuki shook away her troubled thoughts. She was going to school, she was going to Literature Club, she was going to talk to Yuri, and she was going to have a good time. Filled with resolve she headed down the stairs to start her day.

Monika was already finishing up breakfast when Natsuki entered the kitchen. The smaller girl gave a quick wave and hoped up to take a seat at the central table. "Hope you prepared extra!" Natsuki said with a smile.

The club president turned to her ward, "Natsuki! I thought you still weren't feeling well?" Monika asked. It had only been a few months since Natsuki came to live with her after Natsuki escaped from her fathers 'care', and the smaller girl had spent a not insignificant portion of that time ill.

Natsuki shrugged her shoulders "I got better." She responded simply. "And I'm hungry, so if you could." Natsuki gestured to her empty plate. Monika rolled her eyes before dropping a pancake onto Natsuki's plate, which the girl immediately attacked.

Monika sat across from her friend and began to eat her own food. "This is the most energy you've had in a while Natsuki" Monika said. "I hope you still have enough to make it to Club after school."

Natsuki nodded as swallowed another bite of pancake. "That's the plan. And I need to catch up on classes, even with your study help I still think I'm missing some things..." Natsuki trailed off.

"I'll ignore that insult" Monika stated calmly before taking a sip of her drink. Natsuki reddened immediately in response "Sorry I didn't mean-"

"It's fine Natsuki, I'm aware that I have limits and it was a joke anyway." Monika gave Natsuki a soft look. "I'm not him, I won't get angry for no reason, okay?" Natsuki released a breath and nodded. They spent the rest of breakfast quietly chatting.

Finally they made their way outside getting inside Monika's car. Right before leaving Monika turned to Natsuki again "You are sure you're fine?" Monika questioned.

Natsuki beamed. "Never felt better" she lied. Together they set off.

Unfortunately for Natsuki she wasn't fine, there was something wrong with her heart. While she had recently escaped her father’s abusive hold, the years of malnutrition had reaped a toll, stunting her growth and, critically, weakening her heart. If Natsuki had been in good health before she had starved then perhaps her heart would still be in good shape. But fate could not be so kind, in addition to the malnutrition Natsuki had been born with a heart murmur. On its own it would have been harmless, but working in concert with the malnutrition it created a critical flaw in her heart. Now with a ticking time bomb in her chest Natsuki went about her day with little knowledge about how close to death she was.

The day had been a hard one. Natsuki had struggled to stay awake through her classes, and had twice more felt sharp chest pain. By now Natsuki had decided that she would go to the doctor, probably tomorrow if she could manage it. Not tonight though, it was probably already too late to schedule an appointment anyway. And Yuri... Natsuki really wanted to see Yuri again. She had become increasingly sure that Yuri probably liked her back, and that thought was just so exciting. Her happy feelings were interrupted by another jab of pain. Natsuki sucked in a breath and clutched her chest. That one had really hurt! She waited a moment for the pain to recede before continuing on, now very sure that there was something wrong. Suddenly, a pair of arms embraced her.

“Hey Nats! How ya doing?!” Sayori nearly yelled. Natsuki smiled even as she fought down another wave of pain. ‘God, if she does that again I might have a heart attack’ Natsuki thought to herself.

“Fine” Natsuki lied. The pain was fading once more, but it wasn’t completely subsiding. Sayori gave a quizzical look.

“Are you sure Natsuki? I mean, you missed a lot of school recently.” Sayori had a concerned look.

“While I got better.” Natsuki said with a grin sticking out her tongue. Sayori smiled back.

“Well, I guess there’s nothing to worry about then.” She began to make her way to the Club room and Natsuki followed. “Oh! By the way MC won’t be here today.” Sayori explained.

Natsuki turned her head “Why Not?”

“Some family dinner thing or something” Sayori said as she waved her hand about.

“Shouldn’t you know? You’re dating him, Sayori.” Natsuki laughed and Sayori did as well.

“Well I don’t know everything he does!” Sayori exclaimed as the two friends shared their mirth.

Meanwhile, within Natsuki’s chest her heart continued to suffer. Going through back to back jolts had unbalanced the organ even further. It would now take only one or two more pushes before failing completely.

At last Natsuki and Sayori arrived at the club room. Monika had set things up as usual, and Yuri had already seated herself in the corner. She was beautiful, her purple hair flowing over her shoulders, her face a picture of perfection, and her chest... Natsuki calmed herself, no need to get too excited.

“Alright everyone, we’re going to have a light day today, no poem readings or anything like that.” Monika said with a smile.

“So just personal reading?” Yuri asked.

“Yep!” Monika replied. She had already pulled out her own book and taken a seat. “You can read together of course, but I’m sure you already knew that.” She said with a knowing glance in Natsuki’s direction.

Natsuki could take a hint and had already made her way over to Yuri. “Mind if I sit?” she questioned.

“Well you would have to if we want to finish our book” said Yuri with a soft smile. Natsuki returned the smile and took up her seat next to Yuri.

Together they picked up where that had left off. Each took turns reading out loud as they flipped each page. Being so close to Yuri, sharing this experience with her, the book itself, all of it combined to make Natsuki very happy. The warmth sunk into her chest which caused another wave of fresh agony.

Natsuki grimaced and rubbed her chest. ‘Goddamn it! Not again’ she thought, trying very hard to make Yuri not notice.

“Is something wrong Natsuki?” Yuri said as she turned around. Natsuki had failed.

“Um, well nothing really. I feel fine.” Natsuki lied. Yuri gave her a stern look.

“You sure? You missed a lot of school. And just then you looked like you were in pain? Natsuki, if something’s wrong you can tell me.” Yuri wore a look of concern.

“It’s nothing serious,” Natsuki replied. “I’ve just been tired lately, that’s all.”

Yuri gave an unsure and worried glance towards Natsuki. “Okay” she replied. They returned to their reading, surrounded by a new uneasiness.

Meanwhile, Natsuki’s heart rate began to rise, half due to nerves, half due to the malnutrition and murmur. Natsuki shifted around in her seat, a small trickle of pain flowing into her chest. Suddenly Yuri spoke again.

“Sorry. It’s just that...” Her sentence trailed off and Natsuki froze, waiting for her to finish the sentence. Yuri took a deep breath before continuing, “It’s, well, I don’t know how to put this...”

Natsuki had moved to the edge of the seat. Both Sayori and Monika were trying to hide their very clear glances behind their books. Yuri was blushing heavily now, twisting her hair between her fingers, she continued. “I just really care about you and... I think I might like you Natsuki.”

The room was silent. Natsuki sat bug eyed on the chair next to Yuri, her face just as red as hers. Her breath was coming out fast as she hunted through her mind for a response. “Yuri...” Natsuki began, then the most awful wave of agony Natsuki had ever felt washed over her.

Acting on instinct Natsuki moved her hand to her chest, digging into the shirt above her left breast. “I...” she tried to communicate something, a warning, a cry for help perhaps, but it died on her lips as she struggled to draw in air. Yuri was immediately next to her, her expression one of fear.

“Natsuki! What’s wrong!” Yuri said, almost falling out of her chair as she rushed for her companion. Sayori was almost immediately next to Natsuki as well, helping her out of her chair along with Yuri. As Natsuki stood black spots began to creep into her vision. She tried to walk, but her legs felt like they were made of lead. Sayori was trying to help her walk (when had she started walking?) but she had no balance. Her legs gave out, she reached out to grab a desk, succeeded, then her arm gave out spilling her to the floor. Natsuki was aware of her friends surrounding her, their desperate voices, and the overwhelming sense of her heart seemingly being crushed.

Within Natsuki her heart had taken too much, the organ was beating out of control and rapidly heading towards complete arrest. With every skip and stutter a new pulse of torment swept through her. Within moments the pain became too much for Natsuki’s consciousness and she fell into the black void of senselessness. Her heart couldn’t take the punishment either, within a moment of Natsuki sinking into unconsciousness ventricular fibrillation took hold. With that Natsuki’s life began to slip away.

The Club erupted in chaos, Sayori stood over the collapsed Natsuki in shock, Yuri had fallen next to the girl and was shaking her shoulders begging her to wake up, and Monika was only just beginning to process what had just happened. Monika shook her head, she needed to focus, a friend and Club member was in trouble and she looked to be the only one who could help. Monika moved to Natsuki’s side, kneeling down and rolling the girl over. Natsuki’s eyes had closed and worryingly her lips were turning blue. Monika checked Natsuki for breath or pulse, and unsurprisingly found neither. For a moment terror threatened to overwhelm her, one of her close friends was literally dying in front of her. Monika took another deep breath and steeled herself.

“Yuri! Call 911 now!” Monika shouted. “Sayori! Run to the theater and get the AED!” Monika was already undoing Natsuki’s blazer, her fingers gliding along the clothing.

Sayori nodded immediately and sprinted out the door. Meanwhile Yuri, shaking, handed the phone to Monika. “911, what is your emergency?” Asked the voice from the phone, calm and focused.

“My friend just collapsed, she isn’t breathing and doesn’t have a pulse” Monika quickly spoke into the phone, her hands struggling to undo Natsuki’s vest, it’s zipper jammed a third of the way down.

“Do you know CPR?” The operator questioned as Monika continued to wrestle with the zipper. Yuri was next to her and, without a sound, handed Monika a knife. Monika took it without hesitation, using it to slice through the vest and white button-up underneath. Natsuki was now left only in a simple black bra.

“Do you know CPR?” The operator repeated her question as Monika interlaced her fingers over Natsuki’s sternum.

“Yes'' Monika replied with more calm than she felt as she forced her weight forward. The compressions were fierce, each one crushing Natsuki’s chest in and rocking the rest of her body to and fro. “We are at Grancastle High School, room 119.” Monika was composed as she forced her friend's heart to pump blood, keeping a steady pace of fast compressions. Monika switched her gaze up to Yuri, who looked on the edge of tears.

“Yuri,” Monika said quietly, “I’m going to run out of steam if I have to do all this alone, I’m going to need you to breathe for Natsuki” Yuri’s eyes went wide as she turned red.

“But-”

“I’ll show you how to do it” Monika said as she finished the first round of compressions, she moved towards Natsuki’s head. “It’s easy” Monika said with forced serenity, “You tilt her head back” Monika handled Natsuki with great care as she bent her head back. “Then you pinch her nose shut and give two breaths.” Monika’s lips met Natsuki's, the smaller girl’s cheeks puffing out and her chest expanding with the breath. Monika lifted her face from Natsuki’s for only a small moment, huffing in another breath before forcing it into Natsuki’s body. Respiration completed, Monika returned to compressions without hesitation, hammering her friend's sternum.

Monika looked up at Yuri who still looked petrified. Monika’s gaze pierced into Yuri’s “Yuri, if you don’t help, Natsuki will die” her words were edged with ice. Yuri took a deep breath and steeled herself. She moved next to Natsuki, close enough to hear the air forced out from her lips with every one of Monika’s compressions, Close enough to see her crush’s stomach bulge as her chest was forced down, close enough to see her feet sway in a fast rhythm. Yuri rested her hand on Natsuki’s head, already it was beginning to cool. Yuri forced down a wave of nausea as Monika finished the set. “Breathe!” She commanded, and Yuri, drawing in a breath, obeyed.

Natsuki’s lips were slack as Yuri's own met them. She didn’t move or react to the contact in any way, Yuri’s breath merely moved into her causing her chest to expand. Yuri sucked in another gasp of air and forced it into the girl again. The same result followed. Mechanically Monika moved back into position and once more tried to force Natsuki’s heart to beat. Natsuki remained still, her only motion caused by the outside effort of the CPR.

The sound of sprinting foot falls heralded Sayori’s arrival as she practically leaped through the door, AED under her arm. “I’m sorry! I forgot where it was for a second and I paused-“ She was crying as she knelt down with her friends.

Monika quickly glanced her way, not once ceasing her compressions. “It’s okay Sayori, just set it up.” Monika didn’t bother to look up from her frantic work. Sayori unzipped the machine and flipped it open.

“REMOVE CLOTHING FROM PATIENTS CHEST” The AEDs voice was unsurprisingly flat. Sayori snatched up the clothing shears, and moved to Natsuki’s bra as Monika paused her compressions. Sayori hesitated only a moment before cutting the last piece of clothing on Natsuki’s chest. Immediately Monika was crushing down Natsuki’s chest once more, the smaller girls exposed breasts moving in pace with the rhythm.

“REMOVE AND ATTACH PADS AS SHOWN” Was the next prompt. Sayori unpeeled the pads and attached them around Monika’s hands: one on the right under Natsuki’s collarbone, the other on the left below Natsuki’s swaying breast. “DO NOT TOUCH PATIENT- ANALYZING HEART RHYTHM” The machine stated before beeping twice. Monika and Yuri moved back leaving Natsuki laying still on the floor. Though invisible to the rest of the club, the AED carefully measured the electrical impulses of Natsuki’s heart, finding them chaotic and not fit to sustain life. “STAND BY- PREPARING TO SHOCK” the AED announced before releasing a high pitched whine. The AED continued: “ EVERYONE CLEAR. PUSH THE FLASHING BUTTON” Sayori reached out and pressed down on the blinking red light.

The stored charge rolled though Natsuki’s body striking her fibrillating heart and causing her body to spasm slightly. Her head lolled to the side and fingers twitched as the AED did what it could. “SHOCK DELIVERED. ANALYSING HEART RHYTHM.” Once more the machine searched for a stable heart rate, but the shock had been ineffective and Natsuki’s heart still shook uselessly within her. “CONTINUE CPR” Without missing a beat Monika returned to keeping Natsuki alive.

“Shouldn’t she have woken up?” Yuri said as tears began to streak down her cheeks. “It doesn’t always work on the first one” Monika didn’t bother to look up from Natsuki’s chest as she answered Yuri.

“Then…” Sayori attempted to form a question before Monika interrupted her. “Then we shock her again and we keep going until the medics get here or she wakes up.” Sweat was gathering on Monika’s brow, the toll of the constant, exhausting compressions. Her face was expressionless, her gaze focused on making sure that every push on Natsuki’s rib cage carried enough strength to force blood through her dying friend’s system.

“Breathe.” Monika said, almost as much to Natsuki as Yuri. Yuri once again forced oxygen into her crush’s system, then repeated the action. As Natsuki's chest rose with Yuri’s breaths it became clear that a large bruise had settled between her breasts.

“DO NOT TOUCH PATIENT- ANALYZING HEART RHYTHM” The AED’s voice shook Yuri back to attention. Once more the AED searched for a life sustaining heart rhythm, and once more found only an ever-weakening fibrillation. “STAND BY- PREPARING TO SHOCK.” Monika and Yuri moved back, while Sayori already had her thumb over the shock button. “EVERYONE CLEAR. PUSH THE FLASHING BUTTON.”

Everyone’s gaze was locked on Natsuki as Sayori practically hammered the blinking red light. This time the shock was much more visible, arching Natsuki’s back slightly. It only lasted for a brief moment before she crashed back down, her small breasts swaying with the impact. Once again Natsuki laid still and gave no response. “SHOCK DELIVERED. ANALYSING HEART RHYTHM.” A brief moment passed, “CONTINUE CPR.”

“Goddamn it” Monika whispered under her breath as she returned to keeping Natsuki alive, the rest of the club looking on with increasing horror. They didn’t say anything, perhaps they were too frightened that saying something would cause the worst to happen. A sudden pop sound caught their attention, Monika briefly pausing before continuing to force down Natsuki’s sternum. “What was…” Sayori started before Monika interjected “I broke a rib, it happens.” Monika was clearly exhausted, her breathing had become haggard and even more sweat covered her. Tried as she was she did not relent, she wouldn’t until Natsuki got better, her body gave out, or she was forced to stop.

Monika finished the set, “Breathe” she gasped out as Yuri scrambled to position. Two breaths and more canned AED dialogue as the club waited. The machine searched for electrical activity and found none, not even the chaos of fibrillation. After the last shock Natsuki’s heart had fully given out slipping into complete cardiac arrest, it now lay still in her chest. “NO SHOCK ADVISED. CONTINUE CPR.” The voice said.

“Fuck!” Monika practically yelled before going back to desperate compressions. “Wait” Sayori said eyes wide “What does that mean?” Yuri’s hands covered her mouth, she was beginning to shake. “It means we keep going,” Monika huffed out with difficulty. Doubt was beginning to eat at the club, as far as they could reckon their friend was dying on their watch.

It was then that the paramedics burst in, wasting no time in surrounding the fallen Natsuki. There were two of them, both men dressed in matching blue. One had already begun to move Monika away from her friend while the other took over CPR. “Easy now,” said the one pushing Monika back, “We’re going to help your friend now, but I need to know some things, okay?” The man's voice was calm and Monika gave a shaky nod.

“How long had she been down?” The paramedic asked as he opened a bag, revealing an EKG. He removed the AED pads and with haste attached the leads of the new machine, the green screen flaring to life displaying a straight line. He turned to his partner “Asystole” he reported.

“Seven minutes” Monika guessed, Sayori nodded in agreement. “We gave her two shocks from the AED, but it told us to stop.” The paramedic nodded as he took out a pen light and opened Natsuki’s closed eyes. He shined the light in as Monika continued, “She just collapsed, I don’t think she has any condition.”

“Pupils reactive,” he said to his partner, “Anything else? Drugs maybe, she’s sick?” Sayori piped up: “She’s been out of school a lot lately. She said she was too tired to come.” The paramedic knoded, “Giving her a dose of epi, continue CPR” he said as he removed an ambu bag and attached it to Natsuki’s face. He quickly forced three breaths into her before pulling out a syringe and an injection port, he attached both to Natsuki’s neck. The injection was quick, and he immediately returned to the ambu bag, casting his gaze towards the flatlining monitor as the other medic forced Natsuki’s dead heart to beat. The club members had also turned their attention to the EKG, Sayori and Yuri holding one another in blind fear, Monika beside them trying to regain her energy.

A minute passed, then another, as the drug slowly worked its way to Natsuki’s heart. As the epinephrine came into contact with the cardiac muscle it began to twitch and spasm. On the outside the EKG began to spike and surge at random, both medics snapping to attention and grabbing the defibrillator out of the case. “Set for 300,” said the medic with the ambu bag as he set the paddles where the AED pads once laid. “Charge set” his partner stated, the other medic nodded as he turned to the club, “Stay clear.”

The AED shocks had been much smaller in visibility than the full defibrillator, the shock arching Natsuki’s back in full her chest straining against the paddles. Her body fell back to earth with a jolt, shaking with the impact. The monitor showed a large spike settling down into another flatline before picking up again, the arrhythmic peaks of V-fib returning. “Continue CPR, prep second shock” said Ambu bag medic as he returned to his assigned role, his partner doing the same.

Natsuki’s body shook with each compression, but as before she did not reawaken. The paramedics counted softly as they crushed her chest. Before long the paddles were charged again. Another yell of “Clear” preceded another discharge of electricity into Natsuki, but once again her heart failed to return to a proper rate.

As the efforts to revive her friend continued Monika watched the EKG. The longer the resuscitation went on the weaker the waves became, the once high peaks of the arrhythmia flattening out. They were running out of time, if Natsuki fell into asystole a second time the chances of saving her would plummet.

Without comment the paramedics charged their third shock, their expressions set into determined masks. They carefully set the paddles on Natsuki’s naked chest and glanced around at the other girls. Each had their gaze locked on their friends, each face set in a different mask of fear. The paramedics didn’t bother to say clear.

This third shock bowed Natsuki’s entire torso upwards, body seeming to stay in that arched position for a full second before gravity cast her body down with a harsh thump. All attention turned to the EKG, which after the shock had gone flat. A breathless second passed, followed by another. Hope began to flee the room before the EKG announced with a sharp beep and the green line twisting into a peak that Natsuki’s heart had contracted. Then another beep and peak traced across the screen, and a third, and a fourth.

One of the paramedics dug his index finger into Natsuki’s throat, “Sinus Rhythm, slow but stable.” Immediately Natsuki was being placed on a stretcher and wheeled, out her friends following behind. Within moments the paramedics were placing her in an ambulance, the club tentatively standing close by.

One of the paramedics turned, “ Does she have any family to contact?” he asked.

Monika shook her head, “No, she lives with me right now.” The paramedic nodded, and reached out helping her into the ambulance. Sayori and Yuri watched as Monika turned to them with a terse smile. “I’ll call you if anything changes.” Her friends wordlessly nodded as the ambulance doors closed and it drove away.

#resus #cardiophile #cardiophilia #heartbeat #storytelling #resus writing #female resus #female heartbeat

[sainns]

pining ㅤ ⊹ ㅤ all of enha

gnreader ㅤ୨୧ㅤ 𝓒ontent . . .ㅤ friend!enhypen, pre relationship, this is a revamped post from when i first started my account, sunoo's the craziest one here for sure, a singular death joke, not proofread so pls ignore typosㅤ──ㅤ 817 ( 🗒 )

lee heeseung refuses to let you carry anything. he’s made it a habit of grabbing anything that you’re holding and carrying it himself. whether it be shopping bags, your purse, a stuffed animal that he won for you, or groceries, he will be carrying it all. sure, it may be a little hard carrying 15 different bags of groceries up to your apartment but he doesn't mind. even as you complain, saying that you feel bad that he has to carry everything when you can help, he'll just laugh you off, asking you to let him do this for you. you do a lot for him (unbeknownst to you) and this is the least he can do.

park jongseong asks for your opinion on almost everything he does. he'll ask you if he should buy this shirt or that one, watch looks better, what he should eat. it’s like he lost all ability make choices for himself after he gained feelings for you, only trusting your opinion. maybe it's because he wants to have things that you like, who knows. what everyone does know is that the contanst buzzing coming from your phone? jay. he's most definitely texting you about whatever it is he feigns needing help choosing, but he can't help it if your opinion is the only one that matters to him.

sim jaeyun loves to go shopping with you; he literally begs to be able go even if you tell him that you're just going to window shop. not to mention the fact that he is so serious about shopping; he’ll put his phone on do not disturb, giving you his full attention. when you ask him was store he wants to go to he'll shake his head, claming that this trip is for you and if he reall needs something then he can go on his own time. he always ends up buying your stuff for you, waving you off as he gives the cashier his money.

park sunghoon calls you every single night just so that he can fall asleep to your voice. in the beginning he asks you about your day, listening intently and asking follow up questions. he wants to hear your voice for as long as possible, especially when he went the whole day without talking to you. when you ask about his day, though, he gives you the most basic answer possible and moves the conversation back to you. and every morning, without fail, he claims that he didn't mean to fall asleep but your voice is way too soothing for your own good. you figure that he's not telling the full truth after you hear him say goodnight and he doesn't hang up the phone.

kim seonwoo takes more pictures of you than he does of himself. you swear when you caught a glipse of his gallery you saw an album named 'yn' that featured over seven thousand photos of you. which yes, you saw correctly, he has a very full folder full of pictutes of you. most of them aren't even good but he would rather die than delete the ten, nearly identical, photos of you laughing or the blurry video he got while you were ugly crying because of some movie. he also uses them to tease you—laughing when you tell him to delete it. yeah.. he's almost all out of storage, at this point he's going to buy a burner phone just for photos of you.

yang jungwon loves to texts you updates about his day. if you think jay texts you a lot, oh man, jungwon beats him by twenty miles. he'll tell you his plans who they're with, what he's planning on eating, the cute cat family he saw on the street (pictures included). this man tells you everything, every thought he has it feels like. honestly, he only bothers going out so that he has an excuse to text you, it makes him smile brightly at his phone when he sees your responses. when you start sending him updates about your day? he gets so happy, it's his favorite part of the day to hear from you now, nothing else could ever compare.

nishimura riki does not know what personal space is. he's always touching you in some way, even if it's subtle, like your shoulders pressing together when you're sitting on the couch, watching a movie. when you walk somewhere together, you have to push him away multiple times because he's practically on top of you with how close he is. when you're hanging out with friends, he tends to wrao an arm around your shoulder or lean his head against yours. your friends tease him for it, saying that he's practically apart of you now. he glares at them playfully, gripping your hand in his as he pulls you away (he just really wants to be alone with you).

#ㅤ⠀ ૮꒰ ˊᗜˋ ꒱ა ♡ ㅤ⠀ #enhypen x reader #enhypen x you #enhypen x y/n #enhypen fluff #enhypen headcanons #enha headcanons #enha x reader #enha x you #enha fluff #enhypen imagines #heeseung x reader #jay x reader #jake x reader #sunghoon x reader #sunoo x reader #jungwon x reader #niki x reader #riki x reader

[sinisternymphette]

fade into you - modern au!levi

because...I've been thinking about him recently... this is just a cute little self-indulging fic I made.. this is the first time I've ever written him so I apologize if he's a bit uncharacteristic. (also I wrote this in 2 am) Two pov's are here!! (use of f!reader)

⎯ 1984, huh. Good read, classic. You heard a gruff voice speak to you, making you look up almost immediately. Your gaze was met with a rather short middle-aged man's cold yet beautiful silver-blue eyes, his lips an unamused thin line which held no emotion in them. He was wearing an apron, which meant he was one of the people working in the quaint little teashop you were in. You tilted your head slightly to the side in confusion, blinking slowly as if you were a feline. However, you soon figured out he was talking about the book you were so carefully holding- 1984 by George Orwell. He was one of your favorite authors, so earlier this week, you were giddy to learn that your local library had more of his works. And so, you had to pick the next one on your list.

a faint ''oooh!'' left your mouth, staring at him and giving him a brief nod as a close-mouthed smile started to form on your glossy lips a little awkwardly. You gave a quick side glance at the menu that laid on the old and rounded wooden table before you met his eyes again.

⎯ Umm yeah, you started, voice vibrating slightly in a sheepish response to the unexpected comment. No one had ever come up to you before to mention the book you were reading. In fact, this was the first time you've caught a stranger's attention, no matter the reason. In a flick of a moment, you looked at the man in front of you up and down- he had short and straight, sleek black hair which was styled in an undercut curtain. He had dark circles under his eyes, something that you could relate to- though yours weren't as noticeable as his. His appearance almost reminded you to a sickly victorian child mixed with a history teacher, especially because of his stature and choice of clothing. He was wearing a white long-sleeved shirt under his apron, dark brown trousers with a black leather belt and simple black oxfords.

⎯ I love his books. Animal Farm is one of my favorites- actually. You continued, a slight glimmer in your eyes as you spoke softly in almost a murmur. You placed the book on your lap before bringing one of your hands to brush some strands out of your face, placing them under your ears. ⎯ short, but a masterpiece.

The black-haired man's expression remained the same, though you were also met with a slight scoff. He seemed to be unamused, despite his interest in the beginning. This made you pout faintly, only a little. ⎯ Hm, I can agree with that. he mumbled, cold eyes meeting yours again and crossed his arms in front of his chest. His gaze and tone of voice might have made him seem uninterested and cold, but somehow, he still gave off a somewhat 'welcoming' aura, which was strange- to say the least. You guessed he was one of them closed-off types. ⎯ Did you sit here only to talk about Orwell, or do you actually want to drink some tea as well? he suddenly asked, which caught you completely off-guard. You slowly brought your hands together over the book that was sitting on your lap to fidget your fingers with each other in a nervous manner, a tiny frown forming on your features where once laid a soft expression. Usually, people were easy for you to read- but this man seemed like a puzzle, an enigma. Part of you thought that he was simply an asshole, while the other wanted to believe he didn't mean to come off like that- especially by the immediate reaction he had to his own words, his silver slits of eyes widening by the slightest, a glimmer of regret behind them. Still, you didn't want to assume. ⎯ Oh. That was all what was able to come out for a few moments, disappointment and shock carrying that simple word. You glanced to the side. ⎯ Right. Sorry. I'll be getting an hmm.. Arrowroot tea. Small cup, please. A glass of water with that, too. You were finally able to word something, and despite your attempts at sounding firm like him, you came off more awkward than you wanted to, voice as soft as a feather. Oops, so much for being strong and confident.

His gaze lingered on you for a few moments, silence filling the air around the both of you. ⎯ Mhm. With that, he simply gave you a nod, turned around and walked back behind the counters of the shop where all the brewing equipment and coffee-making machines were, murmuring briefly with the other person working there- A brunette, young woman -who seemed to be some years younger than you- with wide brown eyes and her hair up in a ponytail, wearing an apron like the man's. The woman's gaze landed on yours, though you quickly glanced away, staring right down onto your book. He probably said something rude about you to her, despite the fact that you didn't do anything. You just knew it, you felt it.

Your thoughts, however, were interrupted after a few minutes by the sudden sound of him clearing his throat, standing right next to you. You perked your head up ⎯ Here. He placed the warm cup on the table, not bothering to look at you. ⎯ It's 3 dollars. In a swift motion, you opened the zipper of the bag that was sitting on the chair next to yours and pulled out your purse, taking out the pennies of money you owed. Before you were able to turn your back and hand him the money, he placed a small and pretty little porcelain rounded plate in front of you, 2 scones with strawberry jam on it. Strange.. you didn't order those. ⎯ I think you got my order wrong, I didn't ask fo- you spoke up as you turned, though your words were immediately cut off by his husky voice. ⎯ On the house. his gaze softened to some extent, except it switched back to his former one in a blink of an eye. You looked back to the scones, then looked at him again with clear confusion as you gave him the money- your fingers touching his for only seconds before they didn't anymore. Was this because he felt bad about the rudeness from before, or did the girl he was with talked some sense into him? Maybe your hearing was broken. ⎯ Really? you almost blurted out, which caused him to chuff in response, slightly rolling his eyes. ⎯ Yes. Take it or leave it. Despite the roughness that came off with that sentence and the stoic expression on his face, he seemed to have done it as an attempt to hide the way the thin lines of his lips curled up- however minuscule it was. You honestly found it a bit funny and strange, why he was trying to act like such an angry and grumpy little old man instead of just..being normal. ⎯ Uh..thanks, I guess. You replied, rewarding him with a soft smile as you took the cup and brought it to your lips, taking a small sip while you sniffed, enjoying the tea's smell.

⎯ Enjoy your tea. He replied with a brief nod of his head while his gaze remained on you for a short moment before he eventually let out a scoff, though it didn't really seem to be from annoyance, but from something else. You weren't 100% sure though. He then turned away once again and went back to tidying up some tables, occasionally glancing your way. You didn't pay much attention to him though because as soon as he left; you opened your book, took out the lace page marker you had carefully placed in the last page you've been reading, placed it back on the table and got emerged in the story. You furrowed your eyebrows, a sign you were concentrated and not paying attention to your surroundings while you hummed softly to yourself.

Levi walked back to his spot after restlessly cleaning the same table for the past 10 minutes. He had a frown on his face, a dark and gloomy expression as he huffed, using his arm to wipe off some of the little sweat that was starting to form on his forehead. He got behind the counter while Gabi took the task of making the tea, and she quickly turned to look at him as she brewed the order she just got. An amused smile played on her lips, snickering softly which made Levi give her a scowl. ⎯ What do you want, brat. he murmured, bringing his hand to pinch his temples. He was way too embarrassed already, having pulled that stupid little stunt back there and acting like a complete ass to that woman. He didn't even mean to say what he did, but for some reason, the woman made his words get caught in his throat- and it made him confused, it was an unusual thing to happen, a new feeling, so he didn't like that. Still, that wasn't an excuse to act the way he did. And internally, he was still cussing at himself. ⎯ Sooo, did she accept the scones? She asked, a playful glint in her eyes as she waited for his response. Levi sighed. ⎯ What do you think? You see them in my hands? Gabi nodded, understanding what he meant and that it was a warning for her to mind her own business. As much as she loved teasing the old man, she didn't like getting on his bad side, especially if he was already having a rough day. Levi stood there, crossing his arms and leaning over the counter next to the cash register as his gaze traveled through the shop, though his eyes always seemed to land on the woman's even if he didn't intend to. Damnit.

He wasn't sure what caused him to be like this. Usually, he was too focused on his work to even notice the clients he was having. He didn't care about socializing with any of them, or making any new friends. After all, he was already happy with the ones he already had- Falco and Gabi, who were his adopted children, his best friends Erwin, Hange, Miche and Onyankopon, and his dumbass almost-siblings Isabel and Furlan. He didn't need anyone else, nor wanted anyone else. So why was his body acting against his mind?

⎯ She's real pretty she whispered, trying to act discreetly as she nodded towards her with her head, leaning against the wall next to Levi. He shrugged, clearly unamused by her comment as he glanced down, acting as if he was tiding the cash inside the cash register. He didn't respond, just glanced towards the woman's way every few moments. Gabi then left to tend a costumer, a tray on one of her hands with a warm cup of tea.

Some times passed, and you finally got out of the trance-like state you were in as your read your book, head perking up as you yawned softly. Drinking tea always made you sleepy, which was a pleasant feeling. It calmed you down, especially while reading. A content sigh escaped your lips, and you slowly stood up to grab your bag and put your things inside before you fixed your now slightly messy hair. ⎯ Done with your tea, huh. you heard the now familiar cold voice speak up behind you, realizing he was probably waiting for you to finish all this time. You nodded his way, turning fully to look at him correctly. ⎯ Yup, tea and scones were very good, thank you. You replied, your voice sounding more kind now. You looked at the now empty cup in your hand before looking at him, making a small chuckle ⎯ Do I leave this here, or is there a trash can where I can drop this? he shook his head, pulling up his hand in a way of saying no. ⎯ Leave it here. he said with usual tone, his silver eyes looking up and down at you, almost as if he was scanning you. He then took a cloth from his pocket and started to wipe the table clean, no longer looking at you and his expression immediately became stoic again. And so, with that, you started to walk away without looking back. You were tired now, and all you wanted was to go home, take a warm bath and loath on your bed. However, as you were about to open the door, the bell chiming softly, you heard his voice again. ⎯ Will you be coming here again? Your eyes widened as you listened, the tone in his voice almost sounding hopeful, even if it was just a little bit. You turned to look at him one last time, nodding. ⎯ I really liked this place. So yeah, I probably will.

You didn't know, but deep down inside of him, with those simple words you just spoke, a warm and fuzzy feeling stirred in his tummy, even if all he did was nod in response and turn to keep doing what he was doing. A tiny, small, minuscular but content smile almost appeared on his lips. He was glad. Glad that he would see you again, and he couldn’t wait for you to return, as much as he tried to convince himself he didn't.

@sinisternymphette 2024

#✦ . ࣪ ׅ fics #levi ackerman #levi aot #shingeki no kyojin #aot #attack on titan #aot x reader #aot fic #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman x you #levi x reader #levi x you #levi ackerman fluff #dividers by dollywons

[crossbackpoke-check]

Why I Am Not Coming In To Work Today [abridged], Jess Zimmerman

part one | part two

#toronto maple leafs #HELLO EVERYBODY THIS HAS BEEN MONTHS!!! MONTHS IN THE MAKING BECAUSE i AM UNHINGED AND NEEDED THE PRECISE PICTURES THAT I KNEW I WOULD GET #like. seventy five percent of this has been done since the first time i posted this and while it has gotten better with time because #my narratives simply got more complex and there's so much of this that is For Me but don't worry i will explain but aLSO goddamn mitch coul #you have gotten married any later in the year. also willy you truly disappointed me by not getting an absurd haircut this year (now that #i've said this he's going to debut it on instagram like. tomorrow. but anyway that meant y'all got to enjoy my neuroses of #Loving Tyler Bertuzzi who is a goddamn leaf. the joys of having to wait to post this (was not a leaf at the time i started it) and anyway i #have at length i think had the breakdown about tyler in pigtails girl dad & how i got a bob & then tyler copied me which was rude. that's m #gender. ANYWAY starting from the top we got sheldon keefe documentation which was really just the personal decision that i wanted all the #coaching staff to be the markers in the poem/the bold & also at the TIME keefe hadn't re-signed &we thought it might be everybody out w/kyl #anyway the title of the scrap of an old lover's flannel is literally 'u think this is about sheldon & kyle NO it's about timothy liljegren' #bc. liljegren was on the marlies winning cup team & has had a contentious relationship w/keefe ever since & was healthy scratched in playof #& the narrative is sooooo. also at one point for the ryan o'reilly i was going to edit the stlb out of his grandma's shirt or cover it w/th #childhood dreams line but THEN i found the gio snapped stick one which was too perfect for 'crumbling copy' the ryan o'reilly To Me is so. #ur insane in ways u did not think for that one. like. how soft her hands were. his grandma you guys. he grew up a leafs fan. if he ever get #to lift the cup with her again i will lose my shit. the cup run a movie i remember nothing--OKAY the spezz one i knew i needed him stresse #but also i believe in the spezz/kyle narrative so. it comes up later don't worry ALSO SPEZZ FOLLOWING HIM TO PITT CAME AFTER I MADE THIS bu #the muzz tea one makes me a little sensy bc muzz was out with an injury for most of this season & it was a really scary spinal one & so yea #& then the simmer one just straight up makes me cry bc i love him so much & the work that he does for anti-racism in hockey means so much & #if you have that video open & watch it i promise you will cry i do every time it's so beautiful he had to be on comforted by beauty & sammy #boy is on the a man who doesn't know me because EYE remember the caps goalie tandems. baby lilya. the mo one is a little funny bc it is #solely due to wade's thread about mo rielly the coal miner homestead husband. that's why he moves to omaha also i think it suits him (quiet #OK NOW OLD MEN IN LOVE NARRATIVE this one's in contention for my fave bc it's spezz coping w/retirement fundamental meaningless of existenc #u heard abt tyler already that's for me the minchy picture was just too good i had found it earlier & i spent SO LONG looking for an empty #leafs rink picture for bathtub i have some cool construction photos but i wanted the melting ice ones (thought about tahoe lol) & the sprin #one i manip'd a lot bc i needed a spring picture bc playoffs clinch in spring & that one fit so coincidentally perfect bc it's 7 straight #seasons 7 guys so. :) & i KNEW i swore to god they did more milk advertising i knew i was gonna do this one from the minute i saw the poem #the milk patch & it took a hot minute BUT I FOUND THIS ONE this one's for funsies. AND THE PIC I WAITED SO FUCKING LONG FOR this is actuall #from kerf's wedding but i was like i know on god mitch is getting married this summer & that's about to be the drunkest shenanigans wedding #i'm waiting for the pics. & then i was BLESSED with this one which is beautiful & perfect & LOOK AT THEM. anyway the last one is bc

[artistic-apollo]

#featuring dragonfly vessel #dragonfly vess gets his own post #this is what happens when my foolish self thinks i can go to sleep instead of thinking about them #featuring cat vess #featuring cat vessel #cat vess #vessel would be the kind of cat that liquifys when you pick him up #teddy bear ii #iiis cool shirt #i want the shirt i thought up but i thought it up which means it doesnt exist

[star-mum]

Okay OP nation I have some (maybe controversial) statements about the Straw Hats and I need y’all to listEN FIRST OKAY- HEAR ME OUT

Boyfriend: Zoro and Franky

Husband: Usopp and Sanji

Girlfriend: Nami

Wife: Robin

Luffy: Aroace king

#DO YOU SEE THE VISION ???? #like I am a Certified Zoro Girlie but thats not a husband... he has Boyfriend written all over him #I cant call him husband in my head - ‘oh that’s my Husband Zoro’ - ew no - 'thats my BOYFRIEND Zoro' - yes ! #Franky is just cool and sensitive like that -> the boyfren to defeat all boyfrends -> i'd fall hard and fast -> like embarrassingly so #SANJI OH MY GOD !!! THE FIRST MAN WHO DARED TO MALEWIFE #and of course anime he has a couple red flags but I always put those on ‘annoying anime trope’ rather than accepting thats a part of him (C #(OPLA IS HERE TO PROVE THAT) shit like in canon they kinda set him up as this totally uncool Wannabe Casanova (which he is !!) #but he’s also just effortlessly charming ???? me at 7 y/o watching his intro for the very first time ??? a goner !!! -> me at 20 yo watchin #GOD !! USOPP !! THE MAN ! THE KING ! THE LEGEND -> I have ALWAYS been an Usopp girlie -> cause im always right and i love to win #y’all gonna give a pathetic cowardly little man with huge dreams and an even bigger heart who ALWAYS stands up for whats right #DESPITE BEING SCARED ???? I’m in the chapel baby lets do this 👰🏻 -> also his tiddies are always out ??? DUNGAREES WITH NO SHIRT !! WHATS NO #risking his life fighting an incredibly powerful and scary pirate for an entire village who didn’t treat him fairly and DIDNT BELIEVE HIM #him going to a place he was Not Welcomed and constantly mistreated at only to tell a DYING girl incredibly fun stories and keep her company #cause he saw his mom go through the same thing as a kid ? -> i love him yall 🥺 #NAMI !!! thats Girlfriend with a capital G -> shes pretty greedy and a little bit (very) mean -> i love her sm i want her to rule my life #RO !! BIN !! the crush I have on that woman is honestly embarrassing -> she is THE wife -> do not be mistaken #i dont really see Luffy wanting a romantic relationship but that’s not gonna stop me from reading fanfic about him ; p #i had to edit this and glue some tags together so they'd all fit -> thats why theres so many arrows -> I have Thoughts okay -> let me live #one piece #opla #one piece live action #straw hats