#i say this bc I don’t want people taking me talking about things like the manga in bad faith

[coconutredbulllover]

to everyone who has commented on the situation with paige and azzi id just like to say something

fans/people who actually have no clue and just know it happened and thats all don’t exactly feel the same empathy for the situation at the extent they would if they did know more, its a fact, people cant feel as bad for something if they dont know exactly what they’re feeling bad for. of course you can still feel extremely bad, a horrible and unforgivable thing happened but until you know what your actually feeling bad for its more like giving sympathy and condolences to a wall thats made of glass but its like the blurry type glass you cant really see through.

i dont reallt know if that made any sense but im basically trying to say that people who dont know and arent being informed since many people are staying silent in order to prevent spreading it, are like people who got told their dog went to a butterfly farm instead of being told it died. its like they were told a much much softer version of the real thing.

im not sure who or to what extent everyone on tumblr really knows about whats actually out there, but i just want ppl who only know the jist or general idea of what happened and even those who think they know or have seen all or most of it to know that it was actually alot that happened and the volume and extent of what happened was a really sickening thing to ever be informed of.

its insane paige was abt to come onto social media after just a weekend and be active, if you knew what i know then you would agree with me when i say paige is 100% only back on media rn to try and move peoples eyes past it and for pr reasons because thats whats best for the situation. she was most definitely not back after only a weekend ready to return to media just for the fun of it. they both are surrounded by a strong support system and while they may be smiling in the snippet of their lives we get to see, just know that putting up a strong front does not mean everything is okay and if u consider the extent of what happened it would be obvious that many signs point to them being very much not okay and that’s perfectly fine! they need time to heal from it and its not something you get over in a week. doing and feeling better doesnt mean actually being completely okay either healing takes time.

thank God its offseason and there isnt an actual full media spotlight on them right now, with how fast social media goes it likely wont be really talked about as a main focus in just a few weeks and its thankfully already starting to die down in just 1. i hope by the time the new season starts they feel alot better and the months will give them time to move past/through it and the world time to not remember or be focused on it.

im putting this on tumblr specifically because it is more of a hidden site compared to yk tiktok or twitter and likely wont spread anywhere crazy esp bc im keeping it low on actual details

#uconn wbb #paige bueckers #azzi fudd #pazzi

[swifty-fox]

i fucking LOVE kink psychology and talking abt it bc i've said it b4 and ill say it again: ppl are so fucking critical abt kinks without really understanding what kink is. like bdsm being called abuse when its so much deeper than that pisses me off sm. i just think kinks r neat

Kinks are so neat! People are weird and like to do weird stuff in bed! it usually ties back to their childhood in some capacity. t's kinda why I'm writing this Dom Gale au. I wanna explore kink with them in a real and accurate way

“What about people who say it’s abuse? I mean, what's the separation between some asshole who beats his girlfriend and then the dude in a leather mask whipping his until she bleeds?” 

It’s a blunt question, the kind of thing that would come off as rude if it wasn’t the whole reason John was here. Gale folds his fingers together, presses the steeple of his pointers to his nose and regards John. 

“When I dominate someone I am playing a role. I mirror them, make them feel comfortable.”

“You’re doing it now,” John points out, had noted the way Gale kept his body full on and open towards him, their shoulders aligned, hands in similar positions save fro when the blonde was speaking.

“So are you,” Gale shoots right back, grinning wider. 

“Journalist Jedi powers.” John winks at him.

Things are looser now, two friends chatting instead of an interview. It surprised John, the ease with which they slide into it.

“My question stands, though,” John asks, taking another sip of his tea. “What’s the difference?” 

“Consent. I’m selling someone their fantasy. And if they don’t like it or don’t want it then it stops with a single word. If you want to come at it from a psychological angle I’m giving someone a therapeutic space to explore desires they may be scared or ashamed of. I’m giving them safety and comfort and attention.” 

Gale looks John over, his eyes assessing. Though what for, John is not sure. “When I’m alone with someone I am in control of their safety. Mental and physical. It’s a thrill, having that power; and it’s a responsibility I don't take lightly. It’s like flying.”

#swiftytalks #clegan #swiftywrites #kitchern sink au

[lightblueminecraftorchid]

I love learning ASL it’s so good. Makes me happy to learn it. I’m so glad my university has classes for it with professors actually steeped in Deaf culture.

#blue chatter #am I good at ASL? hahahahahahaha. no. #ASL and English grammar are incredibly different and even when I remember my vocab I am easily clockable as hearing #but I do have some language capacity now. enough to communicate the basics. #and I just. genuinely really enjoy it. it’s fun to learn and engaging in a way most of my classes just aren’t. #and I can. yanno. communicate respectfully w Deaf ppl. and learn about their culture #which is incredibly important given that I want to go into a field where there is a higher incidence than typical of Deaf people #autistic? you’re more likely to be Deaf! #not to mention the fact that sign language can sometimes be a useful alternative to speech for nonspeaking/nonverbal people #depending on the person obvi; some nonspeaking/nonverbal autistics cannot use sign language and that’s okay #but surely at some point I will encounter either a Deaf client or a nonspeaking/nonverbal client who uses ASL #and when that time comes I should have some idea of how to communicate with them #I also rly like the Deaf church by my parents’ house #their community is really welcoming and their services are really interesting #I think it’s rly cool how they take intentions directly from the congregation #they’ll raise their hands and then sign what their intention is from their pew to the ambo #which is rly neat #it is funny bc every time I go the Deaf ppl I talk to will tell each other ‘go slow she’s hearing’ #which is ENTIRELY fair bc. I am hearing. and I do need them to go slower. #but it also makes me laugh bc truly everyone knows within a few minutes. #oh hey the new person? they’re hearing. yeah they’re learning ASL at college. sign slowly for her. #which again makes sense bc a big Deaf culture thing is keeping ppl informed. it’s not gossip it’s getting everyone on the same page. #Deaf ppl do NOT beat around the bush that is like the height of rudeness to them. u say what u mean goshdangit. do not waste their time. #which I appreciate the heck out of bc i don’t have to try and phrase things delicately or w/e #it was also funny bc my mom came w me while I was home for Christmas and they asked her if I was her kid #and she said yes. and the lady running the kid’s craft corner thing was like ‘great you’re doing a craft now’ #and I’m sitting there. visibly over 18 years old. amongst several seven year olds. trying desperately to figure out how to say hot glue gun #I made a v pretty pinecone tree it was a lot of fun ^-^

[brookheimer]

……starting to think a lot of you do not know what the word empathetic means

#i have a lot to say about this but it is going to have to wait a few days until i’m no longer up to my ears in work #but here’s a little thing to tide you over: empathy does not a good person make #a capacity for empathy is in no way a capacity let alone willingness for good #empathy and intense horrendous cruelty are not mutually exclusive #if you think that evil comes in a single form if you think evil is just pure callousness coldness spot-it-a-mile-away inability to love #then no fucking wonder people keep doing evil terrible things like in real life and your response is always ?! W hat ?! #shocking: terrible evil people are still people. they are not robots of pure malice. they were once babies with coloring books #that’s not saying we should feel bad for them or anything at all!!! just that you guys seem allergic to acknowledging that it doesn’t take a #category 5 sociopath to commit an atrocity #everyone go read arendt’s banality of evil and go watch act of killing by joshua oppenheimer #no wonder trump keeps winning. y’all don’t view his supporters as people with any qualities other than Racism #like i know this is a fictional character but the response here is so indicative of this much broader issue that makes me want to scream #i get it. you’ve lived in a bubble your whole life and never interacted with people vastly different from yourself and had to acknowledge #their personhood as much as their viewpoints disgusted you. talk to a conservative once in your life it might be mind blowing #not bc you’ll be like WOAH :o THEYRE NOT SO BAD AFTER ALL! no!!!!! because they ARE that bad and they are also regular normal people!!!!! #you are all so incapable of viewing anyone you dislike as having internal lives! christ! #this is how trump won! how do you not see this! #seriously go watch act of killing go watch anwar who murdered hundreds of people in cold blood warmly scold his grandchild for poking a duck #too hard. like the most horrifying part of horrible ppl who commit atrocities is that they aren’t caricatures of evil #we wish they were it would make it easier to understand #agh i’m rambling i’ll shut up #god watch ppl be like Uh why are you defending trump/genocide/fascists etc #dumb fucks i’m telling you the most terrifying part about those people is that they are actually people that’s what makes it so hard to #comprehend bc atrocities are so much easier to swallow when you can pretend a force of pure evil is behind it #okokokok good night lol

[spaceshipkat]

.

#anyone have the mommy issues where you’re constantly compared to your mom in a negative way #i raise my voice oh im just like your wife #i get frustrated oh im just like your wife #i get upset bc i do the very thing you’re asking for and /you don’t seem to fucking see it: and im just like your wife #how many times do i have to say ‘i am not mom’ before you fucking GET IT #i know where my mom is coming from when she talks to my dad #i don’t like it but i literally cannot change it #i know where my dad is coming from with how he behaves and talks to my mom #i also don’t like it but i cannot fucking change it #i am so tired of making an effort—what was once a conscious effort but now comes pretty damn easily #only for that effort to NOT exist the split second he gets upset #because what he envisioned us doing isn’t what happened #so instead of taking about it like an adult you fucking fester in your feelings and then dump on the very people #who are fucking TRYING to have a relationship with you #it’s a goddamn self fulfilling prophecy and i am sick of it. i am sick of constantly having to massage feelings. #i am especially sick of going to bed upset because i feel empathy for what he’s going through #and my best is apparently /not enough/ to make a dent #i am so sick of crying over this goddamn motherfucking shit #i want it to fuckijg stop i want fucking peace and quiet #and for that peace and quiet to not be tangled with worry because i am not there when i might be needed #is this part of being an eldest daughter i don’t fucking know #i am just so tired of my efforts not being seen. of them not making a difference. of them apparently not fucking mattering. #ignore me ill be fine i am just so fucking tired #i want to go to bed without guilt or empathy making it impossible to turn my head off #delete later

[lilgynt]

birthdays haven’t been too bad the last few years but with picking my dad up from rehab last year i’ve been getting antsy about it again and my work is gonna leave balloons and a note on my desk and i do work that day and i thought i had the saving grace of my brother doing a thing with me the DAY after but due to work things were now doin it on the day and it’s just looming closer and closer 😰

#personal #you have like 5 bad birthdays in a row and suddenly have an actual fear of ur bday #again it didn’t happen for a few years so i was fine but dad thing now is scared again 🙄 #anyway i would have said no to the work thing but i wanted to be normal and encourage good will between my coworkers #i mean on my 45 day review perfect notes but my supervisor had to specify leadership when talking about communication bc i DONT be #talking to my coworkers #which totally fine doesn’t effect my work at all but. #idk i didn’t want to be like no when i already don’t talk to people #but did start a convo today!!! #i’m not bad at talking with people or even strangers i’m not even super shy i’m just bad at being a person #anyway so said yes even tho it does make me antsy thinking about #and i hate working on my birthday bc it feels like. #any event on my bday freaks me out or at least used to and does again #like ideal birthday stay home in bed and survive just don’t want to encourage chance or take any risks #i just want to stay still until it’s over and everyone’s okay #but now i’m working and people are gonna say happy birthday and there will be balloons and a note #and my brothers taking me out which yay love him love solo time gonna ask for sushi #but i’m also scared like what if something happens to him? #but it’s silly to live in fear and he’s only here for like a day #and even if my dad came home i also got my first birthday surprise with my friends lying #and saying they needed art supplies and gave me a cake and hannibal stuff and it was so sweet i cried :)))

[padfootastic]

Can you be awesome and give me some well thought out prongsfoot headcanons? (If you have the time), I want to write a story with then and I need more on their dynamic, than just the basics.

(Friendship and Romantic! 😁)

omg hi yes!! i’ve never gotten an ask like this, i don’t think, and my hcs usually develop during stories so let’s see if i can do it :p

x

- soulmates in every universe, if not romantic then definitely platonic. they’ll find their way to each other, always.

- james has a crooked nose that sirius loves kissing. he’s very possessive about it, actually

- j might be generally a bit thick bc of the whole spoiled-only-child thing but he’s particularly attuned to sirius’ moods and emotions. i can imagine him writing long ass letters to his parents in the first few years whenever something tripped him up (which was, ykno, everything considering how sheltered he was) to so for help and sirius featured a lot in this (mum, how do i help with nightmares? mum, he doesn’t like treacle tart what do i doooooo, mum he wasn’t allowed to fly as a kid this is a travesty, mum he’s sad a lot and chai doesn’t always help, mum i don’t know how to make him smile etc etc)

- this one’s controversial, i think, but i love thinking of sirius as modelling james’ behaviour. we know he grew up being fed violent hatred + a superiority complex the size of Everest yeah? fully believe his process of unlearning started with james (the first time he used the word mudblood, our boy probably clutched his pearls, scandalised, ‘what are you doing u can’t say that!!’ so sirius started turning to j as a barometer for how to act, sometimes, bc he realised he couldn’t trust his family (and by extension, his own) behaviour. this isn’t instant, mind, but a gradual, time & labor intensive process and even after he grew out of it, i think sirius had this subconscious tendency to look for james’ approval.

- i hate the whole ‘james matured for a girl’ arc so my take on it is that his ‘growth’ came from a combination of ailing, elderly parents + rising war tensions + most importantly, sirius. end of 5th year he got a first hand view into the treatment his best mate received by his family and that horror made him want to be the best he could for sirius. i’ve always seen james as a protector and a caregiver, someone who takes people under his wing & looks after them, and i don’t think it was ever more obvious than around sirius. post 5th year, he gained a focus that he lacked before and would spend a lot of time just picking up on skills that could help him be better. duelling, defence, first aid, knitting, cooking etc etc. anything to feel useful.

- the shift from friendship to romantic would be tricky & probably require outside intervention or a lot of time, i think. they were already so close as friends that it just never occurs to them to take it any further ykno? their hearts & souls are intertwined, they’re super physically affectionate, and they’re already each other’s no. 1. so someone either has to bring it to their attention, they take yeaaaaars to realise ‘huh. this isn’t how i feel towards others’ or they live a wonderfully fulfilling qpp life together.

- i’ve talked about this before but physical!!! affection!!! and not just in terms of like, kisses or hugs but touch. they’re always in contact in some way. it’s comforting, safe. arms around waists, shoulders, hips/chin resting on the other, leg slung across, hand on a back or leg. you get it right? it’s subconscious, it’s natural, and they don’t even realise they’re doing it unless someone points it out

- sunshine and sunshine protector!!!! james was loud and brash and took all the space in a room. he was also sensitive bc he’s not told no often so when it has to be done, u need to do it in a certain way so he doesn’t internalise it as a personal failing and shut down. sirius is the best one to do it bc he can stand up to james w/o being intimidated + realise that the carrot works better than the stick w him. there’s a very real risk of his light fading out. at the same time, this makes sirius very protective of him. it’s why i wrote shovel talk. even in a universe where lily & sirius were friends, i think he’ll have a Talk with her to confirm her intentions. sirius is not willing to take chances with his james.

- pet names! james called sirius darling and my love and honey and sweetheart because he’s an old soul in a young body. sirius called james love (and sometime babe/baby). their go to for each other was ‘si’ and ‘jamie’ respectively, which was a term of affection on its own bc only they used it, no one else.

- james has *always* been attracted to sirius; he just didn’t realise it bc he thought this was how everyone felt towards sirius. ‘oh yeah he’s so ethereally beautiful, it’s just like, a fact of life and everyone knows it’ and thinks the random boners are normal until one day he realised that, no, that’s not actually the norm & he’s just a simp who thinks everything sirius does is perfect (think chin in hand, heart eyes, sighing)

x

ok i’m gonna cut myself off here bc this is already criminally long but i think it’s pretty clear i can go on for days lol. i tried to include both but i’m not great w romantic so i hope that came thru 🙈🙈

pls tag me in ur story when u write it (even if the hcs don’t help lol u can still use them in a process of elimination to find ur niche)!! i’d love, love , love to read it + always here if u wanna brainstorm 💜

#james potter #sirius black #prongsfoot #gosh this became so long. i was worried i wouldn’t have anything to say and then i couldn’t stop 💀 had to cut myself off after a point #friend this is the first piece of fandom content i’ve written in over a month so thank u sm for the ask #still don’t know if it’s any good but hey. it’s something. i’ll take it. #i’ve talked about james as sirius’ moral compass before but i don’t mean it in a ‘he couldn’t think for himself’ way #rather that when he doubted himself—which was a lot—he’d always go to j for confirmation #(it’s a bit of projection for me bc i do something similar w a friend of mine too) #and whenever he worried he was being a little too much like his family—james would set him straight #just wanted to clear that up bc i’ve seen someone vaguing me ab this and i don’t want them to get the wrong idea again lol #also re james: i can relate to being loud & Too Much. someone once told me i talked too much and i stayed quiet the entire day #not one word escaped my mouth. made people v uncomfortable #i’ve done the rubber band against my wrist thing too & i can see james doing something like that #ig regardless of how one writes j&s the one think i’ll look for is this implicit understanding and bond? #like they’re always each other’s no. 1 and it’s absolutely unconditional. like even when they’re fighting they’ll take care of each other #that’s the relationship i look for (which i don’t often get lolcrie) #but yeah. that’s me. doesn’t have to be everyone 💀 #i didn’t mention it here bc i’ve talked ab it so much but also fully think j was the only one who could fluster sirius #like the boy had a great poker face; probably also a rbf; prided himself ron being a master of his emotions #then along comes one jfp with his doe eyes and stupid fluffy hair and bright big smile #sirius has never blushed so much in his *life* #also think people who don’t know them (aka non hogwarts folx) would probably get the wrong-est impression of sirius if they see him around j #bc he’s everything that he’s *not* around him #it’s actually really funny to imagine lol #mhm ok ye gonna shut up now. thanks for the lovely ask anon & sorry for all the word vomit! #pen’s asks #pen’s notes

[cannot-copia]

just applied for the job i had during college and honestly it feels bad man

everyone I know is actually accomplishing things with their life, buying property, getting promotions, getting their masters etc

fuck, even my cousin who is several years younger than me and has very little to no college (aka doesn’t have student loan debt) just got a management position at a fortune 100 company and is now making more than 60k

And where am I now?

Couldn’t do my job at the big company I was supposed to work at, where I had insurance and got paid enough to actually pay for things

all I do now is feeding horses and basically just putting them in different places 4 hours a day 6 days a week for less than what I made ever since I started working and living off that and what’s left of what I had accumulated in my 401k at my old job (that im gonna have to pay thousands of taxes on for taking it out too early im sure) and therefore fucking myself over for the future- everyone always says start young well I did and I’m too fucking useless to function without wanting to remove my skin apparently so I fucked that up

And yeah it was just an online application so I don’t know how likely it is they’ll even respond and hire me again but I feel like I am going backwards

I did what everybody always insisted I had to do

i went to college

i got a “real” (office) job

i got more than 25k student loan debt I have not been able to make even a dent in

and what do i have to show for it? even worse mental illness? A piece of paper that said i went to college? Crippling fear of answering a phone? an extreme hate for the way I look now?

and now im (at least attempting) to go back to where I was before all that bc that’s the only place i can think of will hire me, to a job I did not enjoy whatsoever, where I am going to have to explain to the high schoolers that would be working closing shift that I will have to do after the morning job like yeah i left here 3 years ago for a competitive job that paid twice as much at one of the (apparently voted) best employers in the city that everyone wants to work for but I threw it all away bc im a useless fucking idiot and now I’m back here working fast food watching all these people who will go to school and get the jobs they want and not fuck it up and actually be successful and move on with their lives

it just,,, it doesn’t feel good

i feel like I’ll never get anywhere so what’s even the point

#and I know you’re probably thinking oh well you have horses you must have plenty of money etc #thing is i work at the place i keep them i do not pay regular price or I would not afford them at all #I’ve only ended up with as many as i have bc at my old #job i made just enough to not be negative every month #and now I can’t get rid of them because I am afraid to talk to people and ended up very attached to one we got with the intention to sell #after a few months #and the other we have had for 10 years now but she would need to be consigned somewhere to get what she’s worth #which requires /talking to people/ #so while I previously could just about afford them I can’t now unless something majorly changes #once i run out of what’s left of my 401k i will not have the money to pay for them #yes i know buying ghost tickets with that was an idiotic thing to do but it temporarily made me happy #which is also another reason i want to try to avoid getting rid of the horses if at all possible #sounds stupid but at this point without them there would really be no point in being here #they’re the only reason I talk to anybody at all these days and they are capable of making me happy #im sorry i feel like i have been complaining on here a lot more frequently lately and i don’t think anybody wants to see shit like this on #their dash but i don’t really have anywhere else to say things #anybody irl always just says ‘well other people did x/it was your decision to y/etc #the shitty insurance I have now does not cover anxiety/depression things I have not been taking any and I have a feeling it is not helping #delete later

[leemarkies]

.

#having a Bad Day #one of my bosses was talking to me about classes i should take next year #and gave some helpful ideas about taking trial advocacy and pretrial lit #which. i do plan on taking the latter sometime next year #but both of those classes would severely mess up my entire course schedule and probably wouldn’t allow me to work twice a week at the firm #but i ofc don’t say that i just nod and agree and say thank you. they don’t need to know what classes i’m taking #and then my head boss talks to me after and says they are suggesting these courses bc my analysis writing has gotten worse since i started #and that he noticed i don’t have a ‘passion’ for this work #so . great. now i feel god awful. not about what they think about me but more about whether or not i’ll be able to keep a job here #and like normally i would not care but. i NEED this job i NEED the money #i pay for my mom’s mortgage and i have loans to pay off + just! normal general things to buy! and GAS! #without this job i’d have $240 a month roughly from my other job which is next to nothing #idk what i’m doing wrong. this job is such a ‘trial by fire’ and i’m sooo intimidated by my bosses #and i’m cheery and i don’t complain and i listen and i smile and i work quickly #and sure i make mistakes but i try! i swear! #if i don’t have this job past the summer idk what i’m going to do i’ll be so fucked #putting all of my eggs in this one basket. already committed to this summer but if they don’t want to hire me after graduation #i will be jobless. i have no network. i spend all of my time working or at home bc i live with two disabled people an hour+ away from campus #and i don’t have the time or energy to do anything else #i’ve dealt with soooo much worse in my life idk why i’m freaking out so much rn #i would give anything to call my grandpa rn for some advice but . #…. haha anyways . great weather we’re having

[imaginarypasta]

nothing grinds my gears quite like a second “why haven’t you responded to me yet” message a mere 1-2 days after the original text

#personal #of course something like further elaboration or a change in subject would be valid #im saying literally like along the lines of ‘why haven’t you responded’ #im not saying no situation ever demands it but that urgency every time we text is so exhausting #like give me a little bit of time. i say 3-5 days is more reasonable but i’m personally fine with full weeks in between #and i understand the logic of ‘oh they’re not responding to me -> possibly feel bad about it possibly neutral -> i’ll just give them a #reminder so they know no hard feelings’ i really do understand that #but the constant demand of respond to a thousand texts within a day #is personally too much and honestly just not something i’m interested in participating in #and i have said before ‘im not on my phone that much. that is simply how long it takes me to respond to messages. if it’s urgent either #call or say it is urgent that way i know’ #AND importantly ‘i don’t go on my phone when i’m hanging out with people’ because that’s almost always what the situation is #and i try so hard to not be annoyed bc i know their intentions are not bad and they just want to talk to me #but idk how many time i have it in me to explain that to the same ppl over and over #and it would be less annoying if there wasn’t a habit of like forgetting this kind of thing about me. i don’t know a better way to say it #anyway. trying so hard to not make this is ‘this is what’s wrong with everyone today’ or ‘i’m so unique’ thing bc i realize how close this #annoyance can get to those places & they’re very much not the attitude i’m coming into this with #ok rant over :p

[pepprs]

ppl are being so fucking mean in the notes of this one wc post abt the new excerpt like. don’t get me wrong i think redacted is a deeply flawed character and i share everyone’s anger and frustration in his storyline being so badly written and lazily thought out and a perfect example of the misogyny in wc like that’s part of why i stopped reading the books bc they kind of fucking suck. but ppl in the notes are saying he’s a loser and should die over… resenting that he is the last person picked for the team? like is that not a universal experience. have we not all been through that. idk. like i know that’s not the most important aspect of this conversation and at the end of the day it’s a fictional character but also it’s like… lol

#purrs #ppl saying he should die over resenting his mom too when like. idk. i get it and i know talking abt these aspects is like unhelpfully #detracting from what the conversation is actually about but like. i think even if his reasons to hate his mom and feel distanced from her #are immature and selfish and he’s needlessly cruel (not to mention the personalities of well established (FEMALE!) characters are literally #being bent into unrecognition narratively to prove him right which i fucking hate) and i think it’s dumb that they didn’t go w his mom for t #this storyline when it was the obvious choice. but also like. the mom stuff is so real. the scene with him and his mom and sister (sorry im #vaguing bc i don’t want this in the search lol) just like wrenched my guts bc that’s what it’s like w me and my mom and my sister. i don’t c #care about the character i don’t even really like him that much and i skim his parts but i think the mom drama storyline is important and #the whole warped view of the world bc of your mom drama storyline is also important and i just don’t like seeing ppl bash him for those #aspects bc… a lot of people out there do that and have that and it doesn’t make them bad people. idk maybe im just defensive and butthurt or #whatever bc it’s making me think abt how maybe how i treat my mom / react to her emotionally neglecting me (and even PERCEIVE it as neglect) #is unfair and flawed and whatever but like. idk. i just think it’s unfair to want him to die for struggling w that and i think that aspect #of it is written in a very real way that i appreciate a lot in a vacuum / detached from the context of the character. and i wish ppl were #focusing their anger towards the erins for choosing him and warping the storyline more than they are taking issue with the actual like. #conflict and emotion in it because yeah i do think that redacted is justified in feeling how he feels in some ways. idk #it’s been pissing me off all night. like ppl are allowed to say die and kys and explode etc i do it all the time but also.. for that #specific thing it doesn’t feel fair. and it’s embarrassing to say that but im saying it. lol #delete later #like the reason he hates his mom isn’t because he hates women it’s because she abandoned him and couldn’t be a mother to him (for extremely #justifiable reasons but still) and even though it’s justifiable that is also like.. real. and it impacts you for life. lol! 🤸🏻‍♀️

[coffee-at-annies]

i may have asked someone a similar Q but i'd love to know your thoughts on this. what's the best way to deal with other fans who judge you because you like a NHL player who is not as good statswise (see: fringe bottom 6 players and 7D, declining vets, backup goalies) but you like them because of their personality, vibes to the team and their overall character that sometimes you see yourself in them?

Whoa boy what a complicated question anon. There are many answers I can give here because it’s not one and done situation.

I think the tl;dr version of this is find fans who celebrate your fave/you and block anyone who says a mean things. If it’s irl, ignore them or change the subject.

Another piece of advice, criticism about your fave is not criticism about you*. It’s real easy to project on players and then experience RSD when people say a mean word. Most of the time criticism is not a value judgement on you. If someone is like “ewww why do you like them,” then you can either explain why you do, or you can stop interacting with that person. I think Carts is getting old, Kappy is being overpaid for his overall performance, and Dumo has been playing poorly. That does not mean I think people who like those players are bad. Fans can like whoever they like. Fans will hate whoever they hate. You cannot control that. Often times it’s not a value judgement on you and if people are treating it so, fuck em. Just walk out. Leave. You don’t have to interact with them.

*okay there’s an asterisk here because sometimes players are known for bad shit - bad hits, domestic abuse, trumpers, saying racist shit, etc. hockeyblr has cancelled players for it, but rarely is everyone on the same page, and if you weren’t around when the news broke it can feel like disproportionate hate for no reason. If you ask politely, someone has receipts on XYZ player that they can share so you can make an informed decision**.

**I say informed decision because this is often not a nice thing to find out. It’s a thing that may trigger stuff like RSD. A player you liked did a thing that many don’t like. Some people make their peace with it and continue to stan. Some people cancel the player. Reactions vary. Reasons for cancelling vary. People have their own opinions. You can’t prevent that.

#had a whole long thing written up and deleted it #bc at the end of the day you’re asking for advice on how to deal with ppl judging you and not players #you can’t prevent everyone from saying mean things about your faves but you can ask people around you to stop #who you like is not a reflection on you and someone not liking your fave does not mean they don’t like you #if that’s getting tangled you should maybe take a step back from hockey #asks answered #anonymous #hopefully this helps #if you want me to talk about dealing with negative talk about players you like i can do that too but that’s going to be long and rambling #the tldr is still block em if they say mean shit #no one is entitled to your time or attention

[iron-cutting-meteor-sword]

I’d decided ever since I first got into Lupin that I was going the completionist route and consuming all the media from it that I could find, but there are some bits that I am dreading going into lol. Despite this I am determined to find something useful and or enjoyable about each Lupin thing I find, because there’s always something you can pick out from them and because to me that’s a fun way of gathering little bits of info and meta on the series and characters, and seeing how they interact or oppose each other. This isn’t to say I’ll ignore the shitty stuff that’s waiting there, but I’m also not going to be writing a post about every bit of awful shit and how I disagree with it for every post I talk about appreciating something, because I trust we all understand and agree that that is clearly not what anyone worthwhile likes or approves of about the series. I may even consider making a meta post talking about the worst recurring themes and content that has stuck around in the franchise over hundreds of different development teams due to negative influence from the various different and levels of cultures involved as well as time period, lack of gender diversity, and internalized bigotry; but also discuss how the series has worked towards visibility on certain issues like queer men in media and even more recently touching on the short hand Fujiko had been drawn for so many years by her getting an entire series for herself written by a woman, and how there is clearly a wide array of people that have touched the foundations of the franchise to make it what it is and how these positives and the negatives sometimes intersect on their way to the surface. It’s such a nuanced subject though and I really don’t want to make a post about that just on the fly. Not to mention I’m certainly not the authority on all the subjects that would need to be covered for such an analysis and I’ve certainly not “arrived” in any sort of way in terms of progressive understanding and analysis of themes and narratives in media, but maybe one day I can start a decent and good faith discussion about the different views on consuming media like Lupin the Third that is so chock full of content that should be left in the past and rightly criticized. Tangent aside, the point is I may talk about or reblog posts about or from some of the less popular installments of the Lupin franchise, and talk about some of the stuff I liked and disliked. Its my opinion that there’s something to be gleaned from each piece of Lupin media, and it all constitutes the giant tower of content that makes the series, even the foundation, the original manga. Despite all of its massive, massive problems, and like it or not, the manga is the reason the anime exists, and it’s history and influence on the series (and the history and influence on the manga itself) can’t just be thrown aside or ignored, as it still influences the series to this day! I think by the logic that is is the foundation of the franchise, there’s clearly something informative to rip from the pages. You just have to join the queue of people waiting to piss on Monkey Punch’s little clown grave after you read it.

#samurai sharkie speaks #I’ll tag the specific media i reblog as always so if you want to blacklist it you can #I hope this makes sense and it doesn’t come across with attitude or anything it’s more just a heads up #and I want to be clear here in saying that if you don’t want to touch the manga I am NOT judging you dude. holy shit not at all #there’s some vile content in there that I have a hard time just reading about #stuff that i will most certainly be wary of and I will not treat that lightly #I’m just. well I’m the type of person who when I get really into something I devour everything I can find down to the marrow #as an art history nerd it’s hard to not be fascinated w the manga and how it’s influenced the series #and how it’s even brought a resurgence of that old Japanese cartoony art style #also I need to be clear in saying that talking about the art style and appreciating its history and style is not approving of monkey punch. #nor is snorting at a stupid bathroom joke that was written by the localization team. #i need to make that clear bc when I’m engaging w the series it’s nice to find something to laugh at. #thinking dick jokes or absurdism or cartoony humor is funny doesn’t mean I like or agree w monkey punch and his disgusting foul scenes. #i say this bc I don’t want people taking me talking about things like the manga in bad faith #and start assuming just bc I chose to engage w things like the manga I condone it. #rest assured I’m not going into the manga and such w/o being aware of all the extremely uncomfortable content I’m in for #but I can’t exactly compile it all for a callout post or anything bc the man is dead. the man can’t do anything anymore. #at this point I can read the manga and see where the anime came from and that’s what I want to do with it #also. not looking forward to watching Harimo’s treasure #my friend found a dvd at a thrift store w/o knowing it had one of the more offensive movie villain caricatures I’ve seen #i know there’s some great gang interactions hidden in there though #so I’ll be looking forward to that #at the very least

[theloveinc]

.

#disclaimer: this is about real life and not tumblr. everything I say here applies to people I know irl not in regards to any of my blogs #anyway #maybe this is like. ungrateful of me or whatever but it sucks always having to be the entertainer #the one who had to show up w/ a smile and all the jokes bc the other person just… relies on u to do all the talking and not … be upset #ok maybe that’s a little bit unfair my friend always lets me rant about things as do I her #but still it’s like. when it really comes down to it… those are all moments thag don’t really regard my temperament #like we’ll be laughing and joking #to actually show up upset… and not with anything to say… you know EYE would be the bad guy for taking things out of her #and like. normally it’s fine bc I don’t want to be sad around my friends #but then I am and I’m so resentful of just… everything #the fact that… it’s so expected of me #to be happy and chill and funny that I’m never allowed the opportunity to just #exist #and again. not talking abt tumblr. but… who is there to make me laugh? who is there to take over for me when things get hard #why do I always have to be like. the person who makes other ppl smile #when I’m just one huge ball of anger and anxiety #anyway I really appreciate my friend because she knows I’m not the best at answering texts and hanging out all the time #but then I just know I have to cancel our hangout bc I’m too stressed and I’m sad #that I’m not really . seen as someone who needs to be taken care of #honestly now that I’m typing this all out I sorta feel like I’m comparing apples to oranges #LMAOOOOO #but it’s true this is something I feel. maybe this just isn’t the place it applies #tho it’s been on my mind for other reasons too #anyway ahhh I hope tomorrow will be okay #and sorry to rant but thanks for letting me even if you didn’t read this far #and if u did… 🦔hedgehog #idk lmao #can’t believe I hit 30 tags so quick… why does that happen always when it’s situations like these and not others? #caitie rants

[distantwave]

#really think I actually need to find a psychiatrist one of these days #not to quote my shitty roomie but I really don’t have to live like this #I am. doing not as bad as I have at other points. but I am definitely not doing great I would say #like I mean things are fine at the moment. but there’s definitely the edge of a precipice kinda feeling to it #like I do really enjoy my job that’s a really good thing for me actually and I finally found a place to live so that’s excellent but #I do REALLY think I need to get help before I move out. which realistically isn’t going to happen bc it’s less than a month away #but uh. I am. not going to do well on my own admittedly. sure I was practically living on my own the last few months in the last place #just bc no one would speak to me. but there were still other people in the house. I think my potential for getting really bad again is #perhaps going to be alarmingly high if I’m on my own without a roommate or a therapist/physiatrist to figure shit out #I don’t want it to take away how excited I am to live at my new place but I genuinely should not be on my own. like practically I’m fine #it’s mentally I won’t do well with it I think #on a totally different note tho if I did ever end up getting diagnosed with what I think I’ve got going on it opens up a ton of #diners drive ins and dives jokes for me lmaoo #so that’s something I guess lol. but yea anyways idk what to do really. am bad at bridging what I can bring up to people and what I can’t #as that is literally one of the defining reasons my relationship with her fucking crashed and burned. so idk when/what/how much I can #talk about things anymore. went from telling no one anything and it completely ruining my closest friendship. to telling her everything and #it ALSO ruining our friendship. so my grasp of what’s appropriate is evidently nonexistent ya know. but I do need to talk to someone bc #I am perhaps doing less than optimal ya know? and I don’t really want to go back to my last therapist I feel like it’s been too long #don’t know what my plan of action is here but this was slightly cathartic at least

[hellfireeddiemunson]

i have bad melted soup brain today and i hate it

#i have never really felt like just disappearing off of the face of the earth and not talking to Anyone before but i have been thinking of it #a lot today! which is wild bc not my normal isolation thought but today it seems good ahahahaha #i am just. tired. i feel like i am not listened to ever and i feel unwanted as hell lately which i know in the back of my mind i am not #unwanted but boy do it feel like that lately lol. and i’ve been back on my ‘im gonna die alone bc nobody ever will love me how i love them’ #bullshit which i have Not missed but it is come back full on ! soooo fun for me hahahahahaha i love to feel miserable about being unwanted #by those around me!!!! love it sooooooooooo much weeeeeee i totally don’t wanna slam my head through a window!!!! #also just in general lately i have felt like people talking to me is a chore to them bc nobody around me has been having actual conversation #it’s all been shit ass one word or one sentence replies from everyone or they talk about what they want and not acknowledge what i said and #i don’t even know what to do about it. i just don’t even want to talk to anyone now bc i feel like they literally don’t want to speak to me #and they don’t care what i have to say clearly bc they don’t pay attention and then bring up what i said says or weeks later like i never #said anything and it’s like hm wow yeah i fucking told you about that??? maybe if you pay attention you’d have known that but it’s fine !!!! #I’m just. tired of it. i am fully understanding of everyone having lives and doing their own things they need to do. but this is like. fr #different. like it feels so much different than that and i don’t get it and i don’t know what to do !!!!!!! i feel like i’m going Nuts #anyways if any of you wanna stick me through a meat grinder i would be forever thankful and you have the rights to take anything i own after #what this boils down to is my autistic ass is like everyone is not doing their normal thing!!! everyone is off their normal talking schedule #with me!!!! this must mean they fucking want me dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! bc they went off script/pattern and not in a way they have in the past #that indicated that they just are struggling to reach out! this is different and bad and they want you out of their life!!!!!!! #which is ridiculous but what the fuck am i to do about it bc i will be thinking this until i basically am told otherwise by these people. so #that’s soooo much fun i love brains they’re so silly i wish i could jump at a wall and stick to it until i just slowly peel off and onto the #floor. anyways. hope everyone else has a good night