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perotovar · 3 months

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into the beat of the night (ch 7) "in my side"

moodboard by @hellishjoel (ty, honey ♥)

pairing: frankie morales/oc!river price (they/them) rating: E (18+) chapter warnings: deadnaming, misgendering, seriously there's a whole character that just dismisses river's entire being so if that triggers you or you don't want to read it i completely understand, one (1) panic attack, one (1) depressive episode, frankie being the best boyfriend in the world, possible food triggers (river doesn't want to eat while depressed), discussions of past abusive behavior (gaslighting, belittling, etc), if i missed anything lmk! word count: 3.5k dividers by @saradika-graphics beta: @scenaaario

main masterlist | series masterlist

They had been at the mall for a couple of hours now, but Frankie didn’t mind. He enjoyed helping River pick out clothes, but he preferred when they went to thrift stores. Less people, fewer crowds.

Plus, the thrift stores usually had something that he could fix up. He had been working with his hands a lot more lately in his free time.

Now, he leaned against the dressing room outer wall, waiting for River to come out and show him a shirt they wanted to try on. Frankie smiled to himself as he thought about his partner.

They’ve been official for six months now. It feels as fresh as when he first saw them at the Night Owl, and as comfortable as if they had been together for years. They spend an equal amount of time at their respective apartments, and visit each other on their lunch breaks frequently. Frankie isn’t sure he has ever been so happy in a relationship as with River. In previous relationships, there was always an expectation of him. A role he had to play. With River, he can just be. They don’t expect anything of him. Except maybe his attention and love.

And he had no problem giving them that.

“Frankie?” River laughed softly.

Frankie startled and turned his head toward his partner. “Sorry, Riv,” he smiled sheepishly. “Zoned out a little. Is that the shirt?”

River’s face softened at their boyfriend’s easy smile. The past six months had been some of the best in River’s life. They were so thankful for Frankie’s respect and patience.

“Yeah,” River nodded. “What d’you think?” They tugged on the long sleeves, pushing their thumb through the hole cut into the fabric. They twirled a little and did some silly, flirty poses for Frankie. He smirked, his eyes twinkling in interest as he shamelessly checked them out.

“You’re insatiable,” River giggled, pushing Frankie’s shoulder playfully.

“Rachael?”

River froze, their entire body going cold in an instant. Their smile dropped and they shut their eyes, face pinched. They’d recognize that voice anywhere.

“Riv? What’s going on?” Frankie stood, one large hand reaching out to cup their face. When River flinched slightly, his heart cracked, just a little. “Baby?”

“Rachael!” The voice chirped again, “It’s been so long! I didn’t think I’d see you here!”

Tears welled up in River’s eyes at the sound of the voice. Her voice. Why did she have to come back into River’s life now? Of all times?

Frankie felt unmoored, suddenly lost for a way to comfort River. He was interrupted by a short, very pretty woman appearing at River’s side and clutching their bicep. She was blonde, and had an almost ethereal beauty about her. Frankie’s brows furrowed and his chest puffed up a little, feeling possessive. Who was this touching his partner?

River opened their eyes slowly, and when they did, Frankie didn’t see his partner in them. His Río. They looked completely numb. “Hello, Evangeline,” River said in a flat tone Frankie didn’t recognize.

Evangeline? Frankie blinked, his left hand tightening around the handles of the bags he was carrying.

Who was Rachael?

“It’s been such a long time,” Evangeline sighed wistfully. “What have you been up to?”

River hadn’t turned to look at Evangeline yet, staring at Frankie’s chest and tracing the pattern of the t-shirt he was wearing today; Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. They swallowed around a lump in their throat and let out a shaky breath. “Working,” they answered simply.

Evangeline ignored them and turned towards Frankie, startling like she just realized he was standing there. “Oh, I’m so sorry! How rude of me, I’m Evangeline.” She said her own name like she was someone to know, and held out her hand for Frankie to take. He looked at her face, then her hand, then River, and decided against it. “I’m sure she’s told you about me?”

“Frankie,” he said simply, voice low and eyes never leaving River’s face. He had to get them out of here. “And no. They haven’t,” Frankie bristled, dark eyes finally landing on Evangeline’s face and finding her staring at him, accusation hardening her features. She was judging him.

Well, the feeling was mutual.

“Riv?” He said softly. River blinked away tears as they looked up at him, avoiding his gaze. This was the smallest he’d ever seen them and he hated it. He didn’t know where his confident, loving River went, and had no idea how to get them back.

“Oh, don’t tell me you actually go by that silly nickname still?” Evangeline giggled.

River winced and bit their lip. They turned and went back into the changing room without another word. When Frankie heard them sniffling, his entire body stiffened.

“I’m sorry, who are you?” Frankie snapped, finally finding his voice, and crossed his arms. He stood a good foot taller than her, but that didn’t seem to bother the petite woman. It didn’t seem like much of anything did. “And why are you calling them Rachael?”

“That’s her name, obviously,” Evangeline rolled her eyes. “Her real one. We dated. For a long time.”

Frankie squinted his eyes. This must have been River’s last serious relationship. He had only heard of her in passing, and certainly never a name or how demeaning she was. Not that they ever needed to, now that they had him.

He ignored the name part on purpose.

“You must be her new plaything,” Evangeline sighed, like she felt sorry for him, as she pretended to check her manicure. “It won’t last long.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t remember asking for your opinion. You can leave now,” Frankie grumbled, taking a step closer to tower over her.

“I’m just trying to help,” she rolled her eyes again. “This is what she does. She’ll keep you around for a little while and when she gets bored, or finds someone new, she’ll leave.”

Frankie sighed angrily, the bile in his throat starting to sting. He set the bags of River’s purchases down on the floor next to the dressing room and quickly turned toward the checkout. Making a harassment complaint would probably get rid of her easily enough. He squeezed his fists tighter at his sides, heavy work boots thundering across the linoleum. Before he made it very far, he heard the sound of heels clacking and turned back toward the changing rooms.

Evangeline was gone.

Frankie sighed and made his way back to River. He stood in front of their changing room and knocked softly on the wall next to the curtain. “Río? Baby? Are you okay?”

River felt like they’d been kicked in the stomach. They could barely breathe or stand. They were hunched over on the bench in the changing room and hiding their face in their hands. They sniffled a few times before coughing, their hand pressed against their chest to try and breathe.

“I’m going to open the curtain, okay?” Frankie’s voice sounded like it was a hundred miles away. Light from the store poured into the small room, making them look up. Frankie was illuminated by the shitty fluorescent lighting, but it was one of the most beautiful things River had ever seen. “Mi amorcito,” he said softly, getting down on his knees in front of them. He cupped their face tenderly and rubbed their tears away with his thumbs.

“Frankie,” River sniffled, face pinched in pain.

“Shh, c’mere,” he soothed, pulling them down onto the floor with him so he could hold them close. He rocked them in his arms and pet their hair comfortingly. “Do you wanna go home?”

River nodded against his skin, their face buried in his neck. He felt the collar of his shirt getting wetter by the minute, but he didn’t care at all.

“C’mon, baby.” He patted their arm gently, encouraging them to stand with him. He laced their fingers together as he grabbed their bags, and led River out of the mall.

It took a few days for River to explain just what happened at the mall. They’d asked Frankie for some space and while he really didn’t want to give it to them, he also respected their wishes too much to argue.

When River texted a picture of Jonsey napping on their lap and their Baphomet slippered-feet in the background, he knew he had the greenlight to visit them. He was at work when he received the photo, and he knew River knew that, so he waited. He responded with his own picture of his greased up hand and forearm and the hangar he was currently working in. He spent the rest of his workday thinking up a plan for that evening.

River hadn’t seen nor heard from Evangeline in a long time. At least seven years. Hearing her voice again brought River back to a place they hoped they’d never return to.

River’s therapist told them that Evangeline was gaslighting them. They’d heard the term used before, but didn’t fully understand what it meant until Dr. Owens explained it to them. Evangeline had been emotionally manipulative and abusive, and even got physical once or twice.

She never accepted River for who they were and did everything in her power to downplay River’s feelings. River still didn’t understand why.

Evangeline would tell River that all of their dysphoria was something else. Everything River felt or even thought was strange or abnormal. Evangeline was the only one in the relationship that was of sound mind. River was already in a vulnerable place when they met, and Evangeline knew just how to exploit that.

There was a chance that Evangeline did actually love River. When they first met in their statistics class in college, their connection had been magnetic. They did a lot of the same sort of things that River and Frankie did now, but River could see now how different it was with Frankie. River was never scared that Frankie would judge or make fun of anything they said. With Evangeline it was like trying to cross a minefield. Whether it was a new band they found, or exploring feelings about their sexuality, River could never predict what would set Evangeline off.

The straw that broke the camel’s back for River came when they wanted to get top surgery. Evangeline blew up, throwing things around her apartment because she was “tired of the weird nonbinary bullshit”. She didn’t believe it existed, and was convinced River was just looking for attention.

River left, changed their number, and never looked back. The night Evangeline tried to get into their apartment in the wee hours, they had the locks changed, too.

A soft mrrp beckoned River’s attention from the floor. Jonsey tilted his head to the side as he looked at them before jumping up onto the couch. He walked his way over to them and got comfy on their lap, kneading the skin of River’s tummy like dough. River smiled sadly and scritched his face lovingly. When Jonsey started purring, they knew they would be stuck there for a while.

Looking through their phone at photos of Frankie, they felt awful. They hadn’t told Frankie any of this, hoping that they just didn’t ever have to think about her ever again. Frankie deserved to know, though, and they wanted to get it out in the open and out of the way.

When they received the photo from Frankie at work, their heart thundered in their chest. They really did love him. They just couldn’t voice it.

Yet.

The smell of River’s favorite takeout place filled the air in Frankie’s truck. His stomach roared to life at the smell of noodles and vegetables. Chicken for him, none for River. He looked in the backseat at the giant pillow/stuffed animal of a bat he found at the store. He hoped they’d like it.

He pulled into River’s apartment complex and parked outside their building. He took a deep breath in the silence of the cab, grabbing the food and the bat, and kicked the door shut with his boot. He held the pillow close as he knocked as softly as he could with his boot against the door.

All the tension in Frankie’s shoulders left as soon as he saw River’s tired face. It looked like they hadn’t slept in a while. Their hair was in a high messy bun, and they wore a pair of boxer briefs, an old faded t-shirt with the words Sisters of Mercy across the chest, and their Baphomet slippers.

“Hey, baby,” Frankie hummed softly, a hopeful smile gracing his features. “Got you something to eat in case you were hungry.”

River smiled sadly at the food. They hadn’t eaten in days, and they probably looked like it, too. The smell of the food hit their nose, making their stomach grumble in protest. Frankie chuckled softly at the sound.

“Figured.” He held out the bag toward them before doing the same with the stuffed animal.

“And who– who is this?” River had to clear their throat in the middle of speaking, realizing they hadn’t spoken in days either. They set the food down on the coffee table as Frankie shut the door behind him, looking over the large bat pillow with a raised eyebrow.

“Do you hate it?” Frankie asked, biting his lip. He usually got Marisol a stuffed animal whenever she was upset. He knew River wasn’t a toddler, but he also knew that they deserved something soft, too. “I saw it at the store, and…” He shrugged, scratching the back of his neck nervously.

River hummed and hugged the pillow close. “I love her,” they smiled up at him.

“Her?” Frankie grinned.

“Her name is Agnes.”

Frankie snorted. “Alright. Agnes it is.” He stepped closer to them as they hugged Agnes and tucked a few stray hairs from their bun behind their ear. “How are you doing, mi río?” He asked softly, cupping their face and rubbing his thumb across their cheekbone.

River’s eyes grew a touch sadder at the question, but they smiled anyway. “A little better,” they answered honestly. “Missed you,” they mumbled, setting Agnes down on the couch so they could wrap their arms around Frankie’s middle. They held on tight, squeezing the air out of his lungs but it felt like the first time Frankie properly breathed in days. He held them just as tightly, before kissing the top of their head.

“Missed you too, baby,” he hummed. “Was worried about you.”

River frowned and squeezed him a little more. “‘M sorry for making you worry,” they said into his shirt, the smell of oil and metal wafting off of him. The scent grounded them.

“Shh, no need to apologize, okay?” He pulled back a little, keeping his arms around them, but looking into their eyes seriously. “I’m always gonna worry about you. Even if I know you’re okay. You know I care about you,” he smiled, brushing the knuckle of his index finger against their nose softly.

River’s heart melted at the gesture, their cheeks growing warm. They smiled and looked at the bottom of his neck, a particular freckle catching their eye. They leaned forward to press a soft kiss to it before resting their head on his chest. Frankie held them close and rocked them gently.

River’s stomach roared, causing them to freeze for a second. Frankie chuckled and kissed the top of their head again. “C’mon. Lets get some food in you, yeah?”

They ate in silence. And when it wasn’t silent, Frankie was talking about Marisol or work. River listened intently, the sound of their boyfriend’s voice soothing them. Frankie put down his spoon after he finished off his fried rice, and grabbed some chopsticks. River’s eyes were glued to the thick fingers of his right hand, pupils dilating.

“Baby?” Frankie smiled softly, picking up a piece of chicken with his chopsticks and holding it above his plate. “Did I lose you?” He teased.

River jumped a little in their seat, their eyes snapping up to his face. “Hm? No,” they cleared their throat, picking up a piece of zucchini with their own chopsticks. They stared at the vegetable and bit their lip. They probably wouldn’t be able to finish the meal Frankie went through the trouble of getting for them. Their appetite seemed to have disappeared again.

Frankie raised a brow, face pinched in concern. “You don’t have to eat anymore right now. You ate most of your noodles, which I’m glad to see,” he said softly. “You can always finish it later.”

River nodded, feeling like they were on autopilot. “We were together for five years. I didn’t… I wasn’t… me, yet.”

Frankie froze, watching River’s face carefully. They were staring out into the middle distance, somewhere around Frankie’s shoulder. “Baby, we don’t have to–”

“Yes, we do,” River’s voice was scratchy, but firm. “I went to therapy after we– After I left her. She wouldn’t let me get top surgery.”

Frankie’s eyebrows furrowed and he set down his chopsticks, crossing his arms over his chest on the dining room table. The air in River’s apartment was still, the dim light from the kitchen making River’s dark features even darker. “‘Let’?” He asked quietly.

River nodded as they swallowed around a lump in their throat. “Yes. There were… rules. Well, unspoken ones. She never believed in, well… this,” they sighed, gesturing to their torso. “Still doesn’t, it seems.”

Frankie stayed quiet, letting them continue, despite wanting nothing more than to put his fist through the table in front of them.

“The… name she called me doesn’t apply to me anymore. My parents don’t even call me that anymore,” they whispered, a bitter laugh tacked on at the end.

“Deadnaming,” Frankie mumbled softly.

“Yeah–” River looked up at him, a confused expression on their face. “You know what that is?”

Frankie smiled shyly, but sadly. “Y-yeah, uh,” he chuckled. “I’ve been doing some research. Only fair,” he shrugged easily.

Tears welled up in River’s eyes as they smiled, picking at the nail polish on their fingers. “You’re amazing,” they whispered.

Frankie blushed, but didn’t argue. This wasn’t about him right now. He rested an open hand on the table, inviting them to give him one of their own. When River gave him one of their hands, he held it firmly in his own, thumb rubbing against their knuckles protectively. “Go on,” he encouraged gently.

River sighed heavily and nodded. They talked for a long time. Explaining anything and everything about their relationship with Evangeline, who they were before, and what brought them to him now. Not much was different, just the fact that they were more secure in who they are now.

“Gotta be honest,” River said softly, voice a little hoarse from talking so much. “Was scared how you’d react to a lot of this. I’m not sure why,” they shrugged. They knew deep down that Frankie would never judge them, nor would he be scared. They’d been through too much together.

Frankie lifted their hand and kissed River’s knuckles tenderly. “I get it,” he nodded. “I felt the same way when I told you about the military. About Colombia. I wasn’t sure if you’d see me differently or not.”

River shook their head. “No. Love you too much for that,” they mumbled quietly.

A wide grin broke out onto Frankie’s face slowly, cheeks burning red. “Love you, too, Riv.”

River hummed happily, then froze. With wide eyes, they stared at Frankie for a minute. They pointed at themself, a silent question written all over their face.

Frankie laughed softly. “You did,” he grinned, standing slowly so he could be closer to them. He cupped their face in his big hands as he looked down at them in their seat. “Love you so much,” he whispered, kissing them properly, lips melding easily against theirs.

River was completely lost in it, fingers tangled into the fabric of Frankie’s t-shirt tightly, like if they let go he’d disappear. They moaned softly into his mouth, a tear falling down their cheek. Frankie hummed in response, catching the tear on his thumb. He pulled away slightly to catch his breath and pressed his lips to their forehead. He kept them close like that for a little while, smelling the old dry shampoo stuck to River’s scalp.

“You should take a bath, baby,” Frankie said softly. River snorted into his shirt, face buried in his tummy.

“You saying I smell?”

When Frankie didn’t answer right away, River laughed, really laughed, for the first time since they were at the mall together.

“I–I’m not!”

River rolled their eyes and smiled up at him, chin resting on his torso. “Wanna join me?”

Frankie raised a brow and smirked, but his face grew serious quickly. “Río, we don’t have to do anything like that–”

“I know,” River muttered. “I didn’t want to. Just wanted,” they bit their lip. “Just wanted to be with you.”

Frankie’s heart melted and he nodded, kissing the hook of River’s nose. “I think I can do that,” he winked.

River didn’t doubt that for a second.

a/n: if you're curious, this is agnes and river's slippers ♥

#frankie morales #frankie morales fanfiction #frankie morales fic #frankie morales angst #frankie morales au #triple frontier fanfiction #triple frontier fic #triple frontier au #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal cinematic universe #oaksfics

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our-transgender-experiences · 1 month

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Some little nuggets of transfem euphoria:

I was in the car a couple of days ago, driving home from lunch with my family, with my elementary-aged brother in the seat next to me. Out of the blue, he says: "You know [deadname], you kinda look like a girl. You wear girl clothes all the time. I bet you could even pass as one!" And I just wanted to scream with joy but I just had to laugh it off because my parents say I can't come out to him, because apparently that would lead to him choosing his own name, and he would choose a crazy and weird name, and my parents are sooo concerned about that for some reason and also refuse to gender me correctly or use my preferred name so that sucks. I had to pretend to be confused when he was literally so right and I wanted to thank him for the most amazing compliment he's ever given me, but I couldn't. But at least my oblivious little brother accidentally gave me a euphoria boost so that was nice

The first time I did real, full-on makeup (not just lipstick or eyeliner, but the whole deal), my transmasc friend asked me where I got my shapeshifting powers and said I pass so well! I was beaming for the rest of the day.

My grandma (who I'm not out to) liked the skirt I wore today, as did a bunch of other people on other days that I've worn it. It's an ankle-length denim skirt with a bunch of big pockets, so it's got comfort, utility, and goes great with a lot of outfits. Always makes me feel a little better.

Wearing a padded bra for the first time. I looked in the mirror and actually saw a girl. *lifechanging*

Same thing with wearing makeup for the first time. It was just tinted lip gloss and eyeliner, but that moment when I was done putting it on and looked in the mirror was magical. That first glimpse at a person that I actually identified with proved irrefutably to myself that I am trans.

Shaving my legs for the first time. Looking down and not getting that squirming, uncomfortable feeling like you're wearing wet socks, that was the most incredible high, better than any drug you could imagine. Ya know, euphoric.

Similarly, discovering tucking. Not feeling awkward and embarrased and grossed out at my own body all the time was relieving.

Sorry for rant lol, just wanted to share that being trans isn't always miserable :)

#transgender #transfem

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couldtransitionsaveher · 2 days

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TREE from WARRIOR CATS

JUSTIFICATION:

"This is probably one of the silliest things I've ever said but hear me out I'm totally taking this completely seriously. Like canonically the reason she gets kicked out of her kitty cat cult is because she's a guy and that's just how their group works but it's just so endlessly funny to me to think of her mom tossing her out, then finding her again later after she's transitioned and everyone looks on disapprovingly like "WOW now you're kicking out your daughters too?? I thought you were against that?? Shame on you"

But yeah basically the group she's born in is one of those matriarchal no-men-allowed groups where all the male cats get sent away when they reach a certain age and the daughters get to stay, so technically if she transitioned she probably would have got to stay...just saying...if we want to go the more serious route a lot of Tree's actual story is about finding herself, a place where she belongs and becoming the person she wants to be instead of who her mom expects her to be. All of this could be applied to pretty much any type of trans headcanon but in my head she should just be a girl y'know

Oh yeah and she also has canonical deadname so that adds something here

Also her in canon partner is one I always saw as a lesbian and she had a lot of borderline romantic friendships with a few other female characters so seeing her get with a guy was jarring (i was disappointed but not surprised) so Tree being transfem also fixes that" - Anonymous

Reminder: Submissions are always open! Submit here!

Did you make your daily click today?

#could transition have saved her #tree warrior cats #warrior cats #warriors #transgender #trans hc #anonymous submission

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atsukinakae · 9 months

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Hi! I wanted to ask if I could request a Luka (miraculous) x ftm reader (he/they). Where reader moves to Paris and becomes the new student in marinettes class. Noone knows that he is trans yet and everyone refers to him as "she". Because of that he gets akumatised but he can change to his normal self while being akumatised. So noone knows the new villain is him because while he is in his akumatised form he looks like a boy, but when he changes back to his normal form he somewhat looks like a girl and acts completely normal. The thing is, he isn't aktually bad or wants to harm people. Hawkmoth told him, that when he steals ladybugs and cat noirs miraculous, Hawkmoth would turn him into a real boy. You can put as much angst and fluff and whatever you want in it if you decide to write it. Sorry if it is confusing. How the story ends is up to you, but maybe a happy ending :). Thank you, and have a nice day!

If your uncomfortable or you want to change the pronouns you can tell me (⁠^⁠^⁠).

The end is kind of a mix of comfort and happy ending

Angst and Fluff | Luka Couffaine x FTM!reader.

d/n:Deadname

Pronoums:He/They

PLEASE READ THIS:Reader is a still in closet and nobody knows he's/they are trans.

Never thought this would happen

It was 8:00AM when the teacher entered in the silent class,"Good morning students"the teacher said,"Good morning", the students said some half asleep and some others trying to not to fall asleep."I know you all aren't fully awake but I want you know that we have a new student"."You can come in".You entered the class looking at the floor,you walked straight were the teacher was and introduce your self,"Hi,i'm d/n".

It hurted you saying your birthname that you never felt like It was yours,but couldn't do anything,you were scared on how would people react.

"You can sit next to Ivan",then a tall boy raised his hand.Even tho it was your first at this new school you were scared because everyone was staring at you like you are some type of alien,but they are just curious.

After school you walked home while listening to music,when you arrived home you found a blue haired boy talking to your mom.

"Hey dear how was your first day of school?"you're mom said with a smile.

"It was good mom"you said looking confused at the blue haired boy.

"Oh I almost forgot,he's Luka Couffaine,my childhood best friend's son

"Luka,she is my daugther *deadname*"

You smiled uncomfortable not knowing what to do, after a few seconds he left because he had things to do.

After eating you went to your bedroom and lay down on your bed.You couldn't stop thinking about Luka,that boy that had you crazy from the second that saw him.

"He's so cute with that smile that is making me go crazy,wait,I just met him today,I can't fall in love with someone without knowing them" That's what you said to yourself.

In the last weeks you everytime you saw Luka he would say hi to you and sometimes even had little conversations.In the class you have been talking with almost everyone except for the blonde girl,Chloe and her friend Sabrina.

But we all know that hapiness isn't forever,one day you woke up without energy and not wanting to talk to anyone.In class you were quiet and your friends were worried about you.In the middle of the class you raised you hand,"Can I go to the bathroom?","Yes,but is everything is okay?",you didn't say anything,you just locked yourself in the bathroom and cried because everyone was refers to you as a girl,even if your not.Cried till you couldn't cry more,on the other side,Hawkmoth was prepared to akumatise his new victim.

A black and purple butterfly flew to you and akumatised you.

"Hello y/n","Who are you and how do you my name?"you said with a shaky voice,"I'm Hawkmoth and I am here to help you","Help me?,How are you going to help me?","I can make you look like a boy but... I want Ladybug and Chat Noir's miraculous".

There was silent for a few seconds,"So... Deal?"

"Deal but I want you to help me with some things because i just arrived a few weeks ago".You said with confidence on yourself.

*Toc Toc* "d/n,are you okay?Do you want to talk?"You hear Marinette worried voice.

You opened the door,without looking at Marinette,"I'm sorry for for worrying y'all,I was not in a good mood" you said while walking out of the bathroom.

It was break time and all you did was eat and listen to your friends.You didn't told anyone about Hawkmoth or that your are the new villain.

"So... Now I am an villain? I mean,they hurt people or try to win against heroes because of they're past.But I just want to be a boy,act and be treated as a boy"You were so deep on your thoughts that you didn't notice Alix talking to you,"Calling d/n to earth",while shaking you from your shoulders.

After that you went back to the class,during class you tried to do a plan in your mind of how to get the miraculous of Ladybug and Chat noir.

After the classes end,you said goodbye to you're friends and went home.

After hoy did all tour tasks, you told you're mom that you we're going for a walk,but that was a lie.

After a few minutes of walking you found a perfect place to active your power,the metro(in Paris the metro are underground).Luckily there wasn't anyone and you transformed,after you looked into the reflect of glass(imagine there was a window or something that could reflect) you saw a boy,you couldn't believe it)

When you came out from you hiding place,you saw that everyone that looked at you got scared, because even though you looked like a boy,you has the aspect of a "villain"

And this was the perfect moment for making some (desastre),the only way to catch ladybug and chat noir's attetion

(Just imagine the fight and all because I don't know how to do this part,sorry)

After a long fight,Ladybug tried to calm you down because she knew that you were innocent and it was all plan yo have the miracles.

Well you actually calmed down a bit.

Chat noir tried to aproach you slowly,in the end he succeded to break the akumatized object and have you back in your normal form.

After Ladybug restored everything,you fell down on your knees and repeting "I couldn't do it","It's over,I won't ever be an actual boy" while sobbing.

Ladybug and Chat noir stared at you with sad and worried eyes,they didn't know what to do or say.Ladybug sat next to you and tried to calm you down by hugging you.

"Little boy,look at me please" said chat noir while wiping away your tears,when he saw your puffy red eyes he got More worried but still tried to act calm for you."We don't know what made you do all of this but just let you know that we are here you anytime you need us"

And with that after a few minutes they dissapeard because their didn't have much time with their costumes on."We gotta go,don't have much time,see ya next time little boy".

After the weekend and all the incident that happened on friday you went back to daily routine,but this time was diferent,Marinette and Alya came to you and once again tried to be friends even after all the times you did never actually spoke too much.But this time you tried to actually be friends with them and tried your best so want be felt left out.

School was over and now you had summer vacations and with your group you went to a near park and the delicious ice cream from the sweet and kind man.Later y'all went to see the beautiful sunset on Luka's ship,"Guys I need to say something"you said while playing with your hands because of the nerves."I- I'm trans,I am boy who is trapped in girls body,and that my name is y/n"

There was a loud silence before everyone hugged,you were surprised because you would have never thought that this will happen.

"It's okay y/n, don't worry,we accept as you truly are","Our sweet and kind boy,we love you and we are proud that you had so much trust on us to tell this"

#mlb x male reader #mlb fanfic #mlb x trans reader #mlb x ftm reader #luka couffaine x male reader #luka couffaine x ftm reader #ftm reader #male reader

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mybrainsrottingwithmcd · 4 months

Text

Today i blocked someone because they renamed Aphmau to my deadname in their rewrite.

they dont know me and i dont know them. Theres not connection, its a common name. Its not targeted

But just seeing it written down brings up a level of discomfort and sadness i thought i was over. The type of thing i’d feel when my teachers would spit out my name in class after i came out. The feeling i got when my mum would scream at me for correcting her on my name. Maybe its recent life events, maybe im just feeling sensitive but when i saw the name i hate written into something i love i just felt odd. yeah

Anyways-

#totally normal shit #trans things XD #this is fine #im fine #aphmau #minecraft diaries #mcd #minecraft roleplay #aphmau mcd #aphmau minecraft diaries #aphblr #anyways #trans #transgender #deadname

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narwhal-butterfly · 10 months

Text

Okay so the Christmas before covid hit my aunt got me the Nimona graphic novel and I loved it I still love it and when I tell you I squealed when I saw Netflix was making a movie, I squealed like I squealed, I was/am very excited

(Not part of this movie but I love that this movie is how I learned that the author of Nimona, one of the creators of Steven Universe, and the creator of She-ra(all of which I love) is trans, well looks like I'm going to go cover up their deadname on my book when I go back to my mom's house lol)

So y'all are getting my live reactions

(spoilers under cut off)

I have only watched 4 minutes into this movie and just EEEEEEEEE like they gave Ballister the biggest sad cat eyes you ever did see and he and Ambrosius are so gay and aasssahhhhhhhhfggggggdybeufbeusl

Okay I hate all of the knight (except Ballister and Ambrosius)

"You think I'm her favorite?" Yes ofc you are, you sweet little sad cat man

Eeeeeeee Ballister and Ambrosius are so fucking cute(this is probably gonna be 90% of this post lol)(edit: I was wrong)

Awww they're all cheering for him ❤❤❤❤ "Let a new era of heros begin with you" awwwww

OH FUCK SAD CAT MAN JUST KILLED THE FUCKING QUEEN WTF WTF WTF

OH SHIT AMBROSUIS JUST FUCKING CUT HIS ARM OFF WTF

OH SHIT WTF IS HAPPENING IT WAS SO HAPPY AND GAY AND CUTE

EEEEE NIMONA MY BELOVED BABY

Ooooh cool robot arm

EEEE baby has found one of her gay dads YIPPIE

"Sick arm. Did it bleed a lot? Did they let you keep the old one?" I love her, she is so fucking weird/pos

"-Then we rise like a firy phoenix from the ashes ro overthrow the government!" YESSSS down with the government!!!!

"This guy looks extremely punchable." "You're right. He is actually punchable." father and gender-fluid child bonding<3

They took his arm >:(

Aww he's going sad little cat mode;-;

Oh no Ambrosius thinks Ballister really killed the Queen ;-;

Baby is shape-shifting and I love her

Ballister sliding in on his face well Nimona is doing all of these cool tricks is the best thing ever

Nimona making her dad breakfast tacos and being unintentionally loud in the kitchen is just adorable and really shows how much of a kid she actually is

She tried to clean up the house well he was asleep awww(well more accurately she tried to make the house more of an evil lair but it's still cute)

"You're a mo-" "what? Marsupial? Mariachi? 🤌Meatball?🤌" I love her

Uh oh baby's got ✨️trauma✨️

"Why are you helping me?" Oh okay then;-; "Because I'm bored." Bullshit "And everybody hates you too." Oh ;_;

"But I'm not a girl. I'm a shark. *teeth click(×2)*" same

Ballister is such a tired dad

Ballister is such a tired dad (but now at a train station)

"He hates freestyle jazz." Pffff but also Awww

Ambrosius hair smells like lavender, alrighty then, but why are you smelling his hair Todd? that's a little fruity/hj

Uh oh the Director knows Nimona

The cereal ad is adorable lmao

"I just think it'd be easier if you were a girl." "Easier to be a girl? You're hilarious." I mean she's not wrong

Ooooh we're getting her backstory!!!! Oh nvm lmao, I love her lol

"And now, you're a boy." " I am today." Mood

Nimona attacking the Squire well Ballister's trying not to get caught as some lady's trying to sell him a car is just beautiful

He is so her dad and I love it

She's so trans and I love her

"Who would protect Todd?" No one, Todd sucks

OH MY GODS, IT WAS THE DIRECTOR WHAT THE HELL????

"Arm-chopping is not a love language!" Nimona I get that you are trying to protect your dad from an unhealthy relationship but in this case it is

Ambrosius no! babyboy do not talk to The Director, she is literally the problem!!!!

"The man I love,-" oh ;-;

Oh my gods, he's jealous of Nimona, no sweetheart, she is not your replacement, she is your new child

Uh oh babyboy's having a breakdown internally

Nimona defending Ballister is so cute

Also the director calling Nimona a 'miscreant, whispering in his ear' as she whispers into Ambrosius' ear is just 😗🤌*chef's kiss*

"It doesn't matter. You shouldn't need proof. You know I'm not a murderer." why must you hurt me like this? I just wanted to watch a movie ;-;

The lovers are fighting and Ballister defending Nimona and that's adorable but also heartbreaking

Nooooo, not the babies(Ballister and Nimona)

Oh my gods she turned into the fucking dragon from the cereal ad

Oh sweetheart, you're not a monster ;-;

"I don't what's scarier the fact that everyone in this kingdom wants to run a sword through my heart... or that sometimes, I just wanna let 'em." oh sweetie :(

Her dad is taking her away to somewhere better I'm crying oh my gods ;-;

YESSSSS AMBROSIUS STAND UP FOR YOUR BOY

Ma'am I don't give a fuck about your nightmares

Oh my gods she just stabbed him what the fuck, you bitch

Thank the gods it was just Nimona acting lmao but yes show the kingdom!!!

Oh my gods they're playing Monopoly I love them she is so his kid and he is so her dad

He sees to her reaction to him being freaked out about her breathing fire and then calls it 'metal' I just- I- eeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhh ;-;

Awwww they're dancing and she's a shark for some reason lol

Aww they're watching scary movies

Oh no baby's having a nightmare :(

"You're safe." Awww "we're home." AWWWWW ;-;/pos

Aww Ballister and Ambrosius are going on a nachos date

Awww Ambrosius believes him

Nimona did not set him up sir, the Director is lying to you, Nimona is a sweet and innocent baby who has done no wrong, well actually she's done a lot of wrong but I don't care she's a sweet innocent baby

Ambrosius ily but do not make him choose between you and his child

Uh oh, what's Todd doing?

Sir, no that is your child, stop yelling at her please;-;

Oh fuck it's Todd

Oh my gods are we getting Nimona's backstory? oh my gods we're getting baby's backstory

Awww her and Gloreth were friends <333

Awwwww she had a crush on Gloreth

Uh oh the other people are scared of her

Oh nooo, oh baby ;-;

Uh ooh

UH OH, baby went Godzilla mode

Oh no she's hurt :(

Anndddd Ambrosius is finally getting how fuck this is

Oh baby :(

"I don't what scarier the fact that everyone in this kingdom wants to run a sword through my heart... or that sometimes, I just wanna let 'em." Oh honey noo :(( ;-;

Oh thanks the gods, her dad stopped her

"I see you, Nimona. And you're not alone." Ooooooh eeeeeeeehh ;-;

YEESSSS BABY'S SAVING THE CITY!!!!

OH FUCK IS SHE OKAY?

OH FUCK HER DAD'S MAKING THE SAD LITTLE CAT EYES AGAIN

Oh, okay, I'm crying now

Oh I'm not okay

Oh my gods, oh my gods oh my gods, she's (maybe(hopefully)) okay

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH SHE'S OKAY!!!! THANK FUCK

#nimona #nimona movie #nimona my beloved #ballister boldheart #ballister blackheart #ambrosius goldenloin #ballister x ambrosius #i love all of them

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glacierruler · 1 year

Text

If I Could Just Kiss You

No it is not almost 4 am now where I live shut up /j /s

Ships: Prinxiety and Dukexiety (Roman and Remus both date Virgil and are fine with it)

Want to make it very clear, Virgil thought Remus was a boy until it introduced himself.

Angst/Fluff, mostly fluff though

CWs: transphobia, accidental misgendering, deadnaming, death mentions(no actual death, I swear), self-deprecation, tell me if I missed any!

Words: 5080

Feel free to spam my inbox with questions about this au

Taglist: @uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous @hyperfixated-homo @cutebisexualmess @starlocked01 Please tell me if you'd like to be added/removed!

Virgil didn’t know what to do. Storm didn’t know what to do because storm liked these two boys. And they were siblings. And Virgil knew that they wouldn’t like storm back, because who would? Storm was self-deprecating, small, and honestly not that attractive. At least not in storm’s eyes. Virgil had weird eyes too, and who would want a freak like storm, with storm’s weird mismatched eyes. One of them a deep purple and the other a bright green. Plus storm’s clothing choices were questionable to most. Most of the time storm wore a black with purple patches hoodie, along with an oversized Fall Out Boys T-shirt, with black jeans. The most expensive thing storm wore were storm’s Doc Martins, although storm had some more expensive shoes at home. Shoes were the one thing storm ever splurged on, because Virgil couldn’t design or make shoes. Storm could hand sew some clothing. Specializing in skirts, but storm was getting better at making dresses, shirts, and pants as well. Also storm loved hand sewing, as it was calming and took up time. Storm was also decent at painting abstract art, and somewhat good at drawing humanesque figures on storm’s computer. So maybe Virgil wasn’t actually useless, storm just thought that way because of past incidents, but let’s not wander there yet. As Virgil was circling into storm’s own thoughts of panic, storm saw movement out of the corner of storm’s eye. Virgil freaked out for a moment, before remembering storm was at the local coffee shop, and there was going to be some movement. It did not help storm’s panic, however, when storm saw who walked in. It was the two siblings. And their friends. And oh, Virgil was so screwed if they saw storm. So so very screwed. Mainly because none of them know Virgil’s actual name, just storm’s deadname, because of course storm’s job at the local college wouldn’t let storm change storm’s name! And storm is so used to not being deadnamed or misgendered here. Just wearing different wristbands to denote the gender that storm was for that day, if storm could pinpoint it down. After all being genderfluid wasn’t easy sometimes. Also now, whenever Remy’s shift ended, Virgil would have to be very careful not to mention either crush’s name because they were here. And by the looks of everyone’s bags, they were here for a while. So Virgil hid behind storm’s computer screen, and did storm’s best not to draw attention to stormself. But eventually…

“Hey, bitch! I’m off my shift!” Remy shouted for the whole cafe to hear. A few of the regular customer’s chuckled, but the table that the two siblings and their posse had sat at all looked confused for a second, and Virgil could feel the heat rush to storm’s cheeks. Storm was not ready to come out to any of those five over there yet. Thankfully Remy’s partner, Emile, walked in just at that moment. Virgil looked at their necklace, and it was pink. Meaning they were a girl today, but storm would wait until storm could see their pronoun pins before using she/her for them.

“Love, what did we say about cursing right after you got off shift?”

“Too wait five minutes before doing so… but, like, hon-”

“Nope, you almost got fired last time you called Virgil a bitch right after you got off of your shift, and we can’t afford to live off of one income in this economy.” Emile stated. And now Virgil could die, because both of them were about to sit at storm’s table, after just calling storm by storm’s preferred name. In front of storm’s crushes who did not know storm’s preferred name. Which, to be fair to Remy and Emile, Virgil was out pretty much everywhere except for storm’s job. Which didn’t allow storm to be out and storm thought that was stupid. But storm couldn’t afford to live based on just commissions and sponsorships alone just yet, so they had to deal with it. Either way, Virgil had been kind of hoping to tell the siblings on storm’s own, without being accidentally outed to them. And, oh great, all of them were paying attention to Remy and Emile now. Who had just kissed, and were walking over to Virgil right now. Oh shit oh shit oh shit! What do I do. Virgil’s heart started pounding, and it was getting harder for storm to breathe, and then storm was shocked and sucking in a huge breath of air after storm felt something cold against storm’s skin.

“Hun, you good, you haven’t freaked out like that here for a while.” Remy’s voice was full of concern. And Virgil nearly cried. Storm had had a panic attack in front of storm’s two crushes. In front of people that constantly talked to storm at the college. Storm was so very fucked if they recognized him.

“I’m fine,” Virgil croaked out, well at least storm’s voice wouldn’t be recognizable, “can we talk about it later?”

“Yeah of course, whatever you need.” Emile said, and Virgil could see their pronoun pins now. So she is using she/her today, good to know.

“Yeah, I’ll tell you two about it later,” Virgil whispered, not wanting anyone else to hear storm. Both of storm’s friends nodded, and storm breathed out a sigh of relief. However before storm could go back to drawing, storm heard a gasp from the table that storm’s crushes were sitting at.

“You’re the person who works at the college right? The one who helps with art and english papers!” Excitement seeping out of this individual’s voice. Virgil looked over, and it was Patton. The guy who storm had helped with an english paper and art assignment. Although the english paper was what storm was payed to do. Patton had chestnut brown eyes, with brown hair to match. If Virgil had remembered correctly something Patton had said, he was from Papua New Guinea. So english hadn’t been his first language, as his parents taught him some other language, Virgil couldn’t remember what it was called, but storm thought it was cool that Patton knew another language. Sometimes storm wished that storm had payed more attention in spanish class. Mainly having taken it because storm’s family was from Mexico, and neither Virgil nor storm’s mother had been taught the language. Either way, now everyone at that table was looking over at storm. And now Virgil was officially screwed. What was storm supposed to do, hide under the table and never get up again. Then Patton spoke up again, “Although I thought you went by a different name? Something like-”

“Er, that’s only my name at the college, I don’t use it anywhere else.” Virgil interrupted, not feeling like getting deadnamed today. And now Roman was looking at storm, and Virgil felt like maybe storm should prepare some lines in storm’s head just in case Roman said something. Although he shouldn’t, after all his sibling, who’s older by one year is nonbinary.

“Ah, then what is your name? And pronouns if you don’t mind me asking.” And oh, Roman’s voice was sweet as honey, and Virgil could swim in it all day. Ah, storm could feel storm’s ears starting to heat up.

“Er, the name I like to use is Virgil, and my pronouns change all the time, but storm/storms pronouns always work,” Virgil’s voice was hoarse, and still a bit scratchy from the panic attack that storm had just had. And before storm could say anything else, Remus spoke up.

“Oh you use neos too! That’s so cool, you know meeting another person who uses neopronouns is like meeting a celebrity from that famous horror movie, Monstruo de la Noche.” The way Remus’s voice sounded like an old, scratchy record, but in a good way, just made Virgil want to melt. Although Virgil didn’t really like horror movies in most aspects, storm would love to watch a horror movie with Remus.

“Er yeah, before I forget to ask what are all your names and pronouns?” And oh no, storm’s voice was no longer scratchy, and while storm liked it on some days, other days it felt way to feminine. Virgil sometimes wished storm had a voice modifier on them, but then again storm was working on speaking more masculinely, it was just a lot of practice. Sometimes Virgil got sick of practicing, just wishing storm could flip a switch and storm’s voice would be deep. And honestly-

“Well you already know who I am kiddo, but I’ll introduce myself again in case you forgot, you do help a lot of people throughout the college. I’m Patton, 23 years old, and he/him and they/them pronouns for me!” Virgil was roughly jarred from storm’s thoughts by the loud voice, although it was a welcome distraction from where storm’s mind was taking storm. Then the person who was sitting across from Patton spoke up.

“My name is Logan, and please use he/him pronouns when it comes to addressing me.” Logan seemed analytical and smart, based on his body language and tone of voice. He had slightly tanned skin and was wearing glasses, a suit, and a tie. Virgil could’ve sworn he was the person who tutored students in the math lab, now that storm though of it. Before he could analyze too much, Remus spoke up.

“Well you already know my name, but my pronouns are he/him and it/its.” Remus looked like it was about to jump on the table with how excited he was.

“The name’s Janus,” a silky smooth voice said next, “although I believe you already knew that, my pronouns however have changed since we last talked. I use they/them and fae/faer pronouns now.” And Janus was right, Virgil had known faer name. Storm had known them in elementary school. They had been the best of friends, but after the incident, Virgil and Janus had grown apart. Storm still felt guilty about the scar that encompassed half of Janus’s face. However, before Virgil could say anything, Janus cut in again. “Just so you know, it wasn’t your fault,” and Virgil felt even more guilty now. Why, storm didn’t know, but now everything felt awkward. The tension in the room was really thick, and storm could tell that everyone else at that table was confused as to what was going on.

“Ah, before I forget to introduce myself to a such a lovely person, my name is Roman and my pronouns are he/him.” Roman announced flamboyantly, and oh, was Virgil head over heels for this guy. Maybe a little too much.

“Right, well it was nice meeting you all…” Virgil trailed off, not sure of what to say. Storm was really bad at socializing, having taken forever to warm up to Remy. Although storm was pretty sure it was because of the incident, but again, storm never liked to think about that. Thankfully Remus stepped in.

“Soo, what’s a school tutor doing at this coffee shop? Oooh, is this where you come to complain about the last minute papers all the students submit,” Virgil did not miss the playful look it gave its brother.

“Err, not quite, this is where I go to draw and do my online courses,” Virgil stated, not sure where to go from here. Thankfully someone else did.

“And storm def comes here to vent about what the english class kids do too, don’t you hun?” Remy snickered, nevermind, Virgil was suddenly reminded of why storm hated Remy now.

“Only a little!” Storm defended, which only got Remy and Emile to snicker as well as a few eyebrow raises from the other table. Before the conversation could go any further, Remy introduced themself.

“Sup you five, I’m Remy, and I use they/them pronouns, and this here is my partner-”

“Hi! I’m Emile, my pronouns also change all the time, like Virgil’s, currently I use she/her, but if you’re ever unsure of what to use, they/them is always okay!”

“Ah, if it wouldn’t terribly bother you three-” Roman started, before Remus interrupted, saying,

“We could totally blow your party! And cafe, into smithereens!” And Virgil couldn’t help but snicker at that, before remembering that they brought bags in, and storm caught Roman give a playful glare to his sibling.

“Uh…” Not a good idea, not a good idea, not a good idea, “sure, I don’t have a problem with it, Remy, Emile?”

“That sounds like a wonderful idea!”

“You need more friends anyways hun.”

“Remy! Be nice!”

Virgil heard Janus chuckle a bit, which was either very good or very bad. Storm’s brain started screaming at storm, thinking it was an absolutely horrible idea to do this, so before anyone could get any further with conversation, Virgil went and sabatoged stormself. “But, before you decide to join us, don’t you have schoolwork to do? With your bags and all?”

“Ah, but lovely Virgil, we have been working on schoolwork for the three hours that we’ve been here! It’s only fair that we catch a break to chat with an engaging individual such as yourself!” And Roman flashed storm that smile that storm loved so much, with slightly crooked, very slightly tinted yellow teeth, which meant they were healthy, as they weren’t an obvious yellow, but subtle enough for someone to tell they weren’t pure white, (don’t ask Virgil why storm knew the proper color healthy teeth were supposed to be). Sure, Virgil knew that he probably flashed that smile at everyone he met, but he certainly didn’t call everyone he met lovely, did he? Maybe he did, how was Virgil supposed to know, anyways Roman had a point. Strictly studying is bad for people. And Virgil knew that because storm had burnt stormself out by doing that.

“Ah, alright, just didn’t want get in the way of studying, y’know?” And oh, the way all of them beamed at storm made Virgil want to never leave this moment of feeling wanted.

After about three hours of all of them sitting and talking, the cafe closed, and Virgil got all of their numbers. And maybe, when no one was looking, storm put a red heart by Roman’s number and a green one by Remus’s.

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Virgil was back at the college, having just finished working with another student, when Roman, Remus, and their friends walked in. Honestly, she was exhausted, trying her best not to cry everytime one of her coworkers called her by that name.

“Yo, Vee, it’s us from the cafe, remember?” And the way Remus nearly screamed that, honestly made Virgil’s day so much better.

“Yeah, do you need help with something?” Virgil was so professional at storm’s job, she honestly deserved a gold star for not acting like storm was hopelessly in love.

“Actually [Redacted], I’ve got this.” One of Virgil’s coworkers, who had an obvious crush on Roman, said. Virgil could see the way Roman tensed up at her voice.

“Nah, Sally, you’ve got a meeting in fifteen, remember?” Storm was trying not to start a fight, not sure why Roman was so tense around her, but he was, so Virgil was going to do her best to make Roman more comfortable.

“Actually, I was wondering if you could take that appointment-”

“This will be the third time this week, Sally, I’m not doing that. I can do this, plus I believe one of them actually has me scheduled to work with them in the next five minutes.” Which, the last part of that was technically a lie, but Virgil never shared who she was working with with her coworkers. Storm never really liked them anyways. Sally huffed, but ultimately said nothing. As soon as she went back, Virgil led them over to a table that was a little further away from everything else.

“Question, do you want us to call you by the name that Sally used when you’re here, or something else?” Logan asked, which Virgil thought was sweet of him, but what really surprised Virgil was the twins talking over each other.

“Was it okay for me to call you Vee? If it wasn’t-”

“I’ll hit him over the head with my morningstar and bury him and-”

“I’ll let Remus do that to me without fighting back, I hope I didn’t almost out you-” And, oh was it sickeningly sweet how much both of them cared about different things, but Virgil should really cut in before it gets worse.

“Look, it’s fine. I’ve told them my preferred name before, they just don’t really use it. Because it’s not my legal name or whatever.” The way all five of them looked at her, seemingly baffled at what she just said, confused Virgil to no end. “Err, what’s wrong?”

“Why do you work at a job, that consistently deadnames and misgenders you?” Remus asked, concern seeping through its voice.

“Because it pays the bills, and I don’t really have a choice at the moment.” Virgil was a bit unsure as what else to say, she really didn’t have a choice if she wanted to be able to pay for all the necessities. “I am trying to find another job, but right now it’s not plausible,” storm really didn’t know why she felt so defensive.

“Vee,” Roman starts, staring at her softly, “we aren’t judging you, we’re just concerned.” And oh, Virgil hadn’t meant to make eye contact, honestly, it was mostly painful. But if she could stand eye contact, she would look in both the twins emerald green eyes all day and night.

“Ah, sorry-”

“Why are you apologizing? Did my brother said you did anything wrong? No, because you didn’t. He was just clearing up a misunderstanding. But if you want, we can pay you to be our personal tutor’s. How does $20 an hour sound?” And Virgil stilled at that, not sure what to do.

“A-are you sure? That’s a lot of money, especially since tutoring sessions can be long.”

“Look, absolutely no offense to you, but I’d pay you $100 per hour if it meant I never had to deal with Sally again,” Roman said dryly, and oh, was Virgil glad to know that there was no way Roman had even the smallest crush on Sally.

“Okay, um, then yeah, I can tutor you all, do you want to do group or individual sessions?”

“Group for now, and maybe, if any of us have extra money and need help, we can do individual sessions next,” Janus supplied, faer voice sounding uninterested, but Virgil could see the intrigue in their eyes. Virgil nodded, and the next day she sent in storm’s two day notice.

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had been a few months, Virgil was turning 19 soon, and both of his crushes were 20 and 21 respectively. Still, storm’s feelings for them weren’t going away anytime soon. So he had decided, he would tell both the siblings that he liked them within a week.

“Remy, you just don’t understand! They’re so cute and sweet and kind, and honestly I think this is something amazing that’s happening. If I can just get the guts to ask them out. You don’t understand-”

“Right hun, because I don’t understand how simping for someone else feels,” Remy rolled their eyes, sounding slightly annoyed. “Now where’s the part where you tell them?”

And that’s how Virgil started telling a very long story. “Well, I was gonna tell them on Monday, but when I saw them they were kind of flirting with another guy. And I didn’t know if maybe one or both of them were dating that guy. I found out later that day, that they were just being friendly with him because he’s a cool guy, and flirting is just their dynamic. Which y’know kinda makes me feel jealous a little, and maybe hopeless, because I thought that they might be flirting with me because they like me, but it could just be because that’s our dynamic, and do I really need to ruin our dynamic with my stupid feelings.” Virgil breathed in and out heavily after that. Speaking fast, because the siblings could be at the cafe soon, and Virgil honestly couldn’t risk them finding out before storm was ready. “Then on Tuesday, they were busy studying for a few tests for their english class and overall I was really busy with commissions, and I also knew I wasn’t ready to tell them yet. On Wednesday I meant to tell them after tutoring was done, but then everyone was there, and I don’t know if I want everyone to see me embarrass myself trying to make a love confession, and then a thought occurred to me. What if they thought I was just getting closer to them to get with them? I wasn’t doing that, but what if they thought that. Surely they would hate me, and because they’re friends with everyone else,” Virgil gasped for air mid sentence, looking around the room for any sign of the twins, they weren’t due to show up yet, and were almost always late. But still Virgil couldn’t risk them finding out from storm rambling to Remy. “then everyone else would hate me. Throughout the whole day Thursday, I meant to tell them, but then my mind was all like ‘would they even like you back, and what would you do if they don’t, it would be too awkward to stay friends, wouldn’t it?’ And so I backed out. Cause I’m really scare of ruining my friendship with them becuase I have feelings and they don’t.” Virgil’s speech was slowing down a little bit, but that was only due to the lack of breath that storm was taking in. So he took a few to breathe in and out deeply, and quadruple checked the room to make sure that the twins still weren’t there to continue rambling. “Friday was weird, because I actually almost told them. Roman, Remus, and I were just hanging out at the park, and I got cold, and they both offered me one of their jackets, and honestly how could I say no. And is that a sign they were flirting with me? Anyways, they each handed me a jacket, but before I could say anything, I remembered that I never asked them about their thoughts on polyamory before, and if they would ever, like, share a boyfriend. That sounds weird, but you know what I’m trying to say,” Virgil interrupted stormself again, gasping for breath again because he kept losing all of the oxygen in his lungs due to the fact that storm was trying to get this all out in one go. He caught Remy’s eyebrow raise, and could tell that storms friend was actually invested in whatever was going on in his love life.

“Hun, maybe you should take a few to breathe before continuing.”

“No time Remy, both of them will be here in maybe a few minutes, and I’m confessing to them today, at this cafe. Where I officially got to meet them y’know? Anyways, where was I…”

Remy sighed, knowing they weren’t going to convince Virgil to slow down on his storytelling. “Alright hun, you were at the part where you said you were just thinking about their thoughts on polyamory, and whether or not they’d be fine with you dating both of them.”

“Oh yeah, so that was on Friday, and I didn’t know how to bring it up without sounding weird, so I kept trying different topics of small talk, like, isn’t the sky pretty, kind of small talk. And eventually we got on the topic of polyamory, although I don’t remember how,” Virgil started looking around again, trying to make sure that neither Roman nor Remus were here yet. Thankfully storm didn’t see either of them. It really was a good thing that Remus and its brother were always running late. “And eventually I learned that not only were they fine dating the same person as their other brother, but they both actually have a crush on the same person. And while I know that they probably don’t like me like that, I have to tell them before I can move on y’know? Like I want to be happy for them when they get into a relationship with the person they like. But I can’t do that unless I tell them I like them.”

“Alright babes, I have a few questions. One, how do you know they don’t like you? Yes, you do have to answer that question with actual facts. Two, how do you know that, if the person they like isn’t you, they would get into a relationship with them? And three. How The Fuck do you talk so fast?” Virgil stilled at that, not quite sure how to anwer the questions that storm’s best friend just posed.

“Well, for the first question, I know I’m really self-deprecating, and I’m not that attractive. Plus I’m kind of small for someone my age, and they have said before that dating someone small could be a problem because kissing them would be harder, and so I’d have to be worth the effort for them to bend down and kiss, and honestly Remy, I don’t think I am. Plus if they liked me wouldn’t I have noticed by now?” Virgil gasped and looked around the cafe again for those two. Thankfully, it seemed like they were running late. “As for your second question, who wouldn’t want to get into a relationship with them? They’re cute, sweet, handsome, stunning, smart, adorable, kind, beautiful, pretty, intelligent and despite the sometimes crude subjects that they bring up, both of them are really compassionate, like that time when-”

“I get it hun, they’re cute, kind, and smart. But, no offense, I wouldn’t date them, they aren’t my type. Also, remember not to idolize them, as that’s not healthy for anyone. Like, babes, I’m not saying that they aren’t cute, kind, and smart. I’m saying don’t put them on a pedestal. It gives them hopeless expectations to live up to, and it hurts you when they can’t live up to it. It’s not pretty, remember my relationship before Emile? That’s why it went so sour. Also, please stop putting yourself down like that hun, I get feeling that way, but saying it outloud to yourself makes it worse. I know this from experience.”

Virgil had to stop for a minute, and made a note to also acknowledge the mistakes that the siblings made, instead of only focusing on what they did right. It wasn’t good for anyone for storm not to acknowledge what they did that ticked him off, or was downright wrong. “Alright Remy, I promise not to idolize them, I definitely don’t want what happened to you to happen to me. And I’ll try not to, actually with the paycheck I’m getting from all my new friends, I’ll probably be able to get into therapy, since we’ve discussed that that would be a good thing for me to do too.”

“Now hun, you don’t get to ignore my third question either,” Remy said, before adding, “but it looks like your dates are here, so I’ll take my leave.” Virgil blushed and hissed at them, before turning around and seeing two twins grinning and standing behind where storm’s back used to be.

“So, lovely stormcloud, I heard you wanted to meet us here. Could I ask what this is about?” Roman asked, his voice smooth as silk, and his face held a playful smirk to it.

“U-uh, yeah, just give me a minute, I got sidetracked and need to remember what I was going to say.”

“Well it wasn’t to brutally murder us, but maybe poison? Nah, too many people around, you’d never get away with it, unless…” Remus joked, bouncing on the soles of its feet.

“No, I did not bring you here to murder you. Neither of you have made my hitlist, yet…” Virgil trailed off trying to sound ominous. Although it definitely helped that storm had been getting better at making his voice deeper.

“Oh? What do we have to do to make it on their?” Remus was entirely too excited for being told that it could end up being on a hitlist.

“Uh, haven’t figured that out yet?”

“Oh, that’s kind of sad, I wanted to be first on your hitlist!” Virgil couldn’t help but laugh a little at that, before remembering why storm had brought those to here.

“Err, there’s something th-that I h-have to t-tell you, a-and,” Virgil was having trouble breathing all of a sudden. And storm’s hands were really clammy now, and this was a stupid idea, there’s no way they’ll ever like you back, what are you doing!

And then he felt something cold against storm’s neck. “Stormcloud, I know you want to tell us something, but if you’re not ready we can just hang out and chill. Don’t force yourself to do something you’re not ready for.”

“Yeah, how are we supposed to fill Roman’s shampoo with sickly green hair dye, if you’re panicking.” Roman rolled his eyes, but smiled a little when Virgil snorted a little at that. If you’re gonna do it, do it now before you back out coward!

“I- just- there’s something I need to say, and if I could just kiss you…” Virgil eventually managed to get out, storm’s eyes scared of rejection from either of the two siblings, but willing to risk everything because these feelings were too much for storm. Both Roman and Remus looked at eachother, before Roman walked over to Virgil. And despite Virgil wearing two inch platforms, he was still smaller than both of them, and it showed. Because when Roman got close to storm, Virgil couldn’t help but feel a little small considering with the platforms he stood at 5’4. And Remus and Roman were both 5’8

“All you had to do was ask, stormcloud.”

“Also we kind of figured you liked us both,” Remus said as it started to walk behind Virgil, and eventually wrapping his arms around storm. “You weren’t good at hiding it. Just wanted you to tell us without feeling pressured.” After that Roman lifted Virgil’s chin up with two fingers and kissed him softly and sweetly. Then, after Roman was done kissing him, Remus turned Virgil around and kissed him roughly and passionately.

#dukexiety #prinxiety #roman #remus #virgil #patton #janus #logan #remy #emile #glacier writes #glacier's fanfics #cw transphobia #cw deadnaming #cw murder mentions #cw self deprecation #cw accidental misgendering

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