#i posted about my song on tiktok and I’m proud of it!!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

eviesaurusrex · 2 years

Text

ʜᴀʀʀʏ ꜱᴛʏʟᴇꜱ x ᴀꜱᴘɪʀɪɴɢ ꜱɪɴɢᴇʀ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

faceclaim: Devon Cole

author’s note: I had this idea on a whim (and bc I’m obsessed with her music), and now it’s here. I hope you enjoy this! lindathetree and billtherock are reader’s best friends! Aaaand we’re gonna change his outfit order for NYC. The blue vest set is now NYC I, and the red-striped candy cane jumpsuit is (still) NYC II—I mixed something up and was too lazy to change it lol. Attention: This is… a tad long. And not entirely proofread bc I still struggle with the pain management of my wisdom teeth removal rip

;

yourinstagram I’m still in awe and stare in shameless wonder over this next milestone in my (relatively young and short) career as an artist. This was only possible because of you out there, who always enjoyed my little videos of lyric snippets, always urging me to write full songs and release them as such out into this world.

This is your triumph <3

And a huge thanks to Spotify for making my newest baby a bop!

Liked by lindathetree, yourfan1, blurryh, and 11,970 others | 2,224 comments

yourfan1 Witch deserves even more!!!

yourfan2 I’m 100% one of the 2,179 listeners because I have this masterpiece on repeat 24/7 🥰

lindathetree Yes, hello, it’s what you deserve, baby, had to say this, byyyyyye ❤️

↳ yourinstagram I love you, L 🥺❤️

↳ lindathetree luv yu 2 :*

Spotify It’s a pleasure to be part of your journey!

liked by yourinstagram, lindathetree, yourfan9, and 296 others

billtherock It’s one of your best works, turtle. It’s only natural for it to gain the attention it deserves—AND YOU!

↳ yourinstagram Biiiiiill 🥺

↳ yourfan3 Get yourself friends like Bill and Linda.

liked by lindathetree, billtherock, yourinstagram and 13 others

yourfan4 I discovered you over the for you page on both youtube and tiktok and have followed you ever since, and I am so immensely proud of you, YN. I feel like a very proud big brother right now, and I’m being very emotional over this post 🥺

↳ yourinstagram Oh my, love! Thank you so much. This really means the world to lil’ ol me (and I wouldn’t mind having a proud big brother) ❤️

liked by yourfan4, yourfan2, yourfan8, and 56 others

↳ yourfan4 Anytime, YN 🥰❤️

blurryh so damn proud of you, darling ❤️

liked by yourinstagram, billtherock, and 2 others

↳ yourinstagram ❤️❤️❤️

↳ yourinstagram It wouldn’t have been possible without your constant and loving support and help and reassurance, H <3

liked by blurryh, annetwist, lindathetree, and 2 others

↳ blurryh Bollocks, I was only rooting for you in the back ❤️ You did this perfectly on your own x

liked by yourinstagram and gemmastyles

ynfanpage My phone is so full of screenshots and videos of the beauty and grace, and talent that is YN LN; it should be mandatory for everyone in this world. Seeing her and her songs getting the attention they deserve makes my heart full. Our woman deserves nothing less ❤️

[yourinstagram]

Liked by blurryh, yourfan2, yourfan3, yourinstagram, and 1,329 others | 337 comments

yourfan1 beautifully said!

yourfan2 +1

yourfan3 It was about time. She’s supposed to make BANK with her music because it’s this good.

↳ ynfanpage Totally. But I also don’t wanna see her leave the bookshop she is working at bc it’s my favorite part of the week to chat with her 👉🏻👈🏻

liked by yourinstagram and 10 others

↳ yourfan4 YOU ARE ONE LUCKY HUMAN???

↳ yourfan3 😦😦😦

yourinstagram I’m full-on blushing in the middle of a subway station 🫣

liked by yourfan2, yourfan4, ynfanpage, blurryh, and 121 others

↳ ynfanpage I won’t apologize for that! 🤭

lindathetree You’re not alone 👀😅

liked by ynfanpage, billtherock, and 8 others

usweekly Singer-songwriter Harry Styles was today seen in New York City on a stroll with a young woman, who fans suspect is newcomer singer-songwriter YN LN. Her latest song W.I.T.C.H. hit the 2 million listening mark on Spotify a few weeks ago and was named It’s a Bop on the music streaming service.

Liked by yourfan1, yourfan2, hsfan1, harrystylesfanpage, and 2,439 others | 1,525 comments

yourfan1 😦😍

yourfan2 They know each other???? 🥹

hsfan1 Oh. I didn’t see that one coming

internet_troll Probably using him for fame.

internet_troll2 Not her. She is so untalented 💀

↳ internet_troll3 lol yeah. And she is DEFINITELY using him for fame, that b*tch

liked by harryismyman

hsfan2 I actually like what I see. She is a sweetheart! And their style match perfectly 🤭

↳ yourfan3 She really is! Just as Harry. Match made in heaven? 👀

↳ hsfan3 It seems 👀

internet_troll4 She should keep her hands off him—that’s my man.

↳ hsfan4 pathetic 🙄

hsfan5 I hope she isn’t using him, tho I don’t think she could do that bc she really is lovely.

harrystylesfanpage Uhm… YN is really good??? And the mv to W.I.T.C.H. is really aesthetically appealing? I like what I see (and hear). So, if the rumors are true, could we welcome her with open arms bc I think she is a Harrie on top of being talented af🖖🏽

Liked by hsfan1, hsfan2, yourfan1, ynfanpage, and 328 others | 99 comments

ynfanpage She actually is. She tried to save as much money as possible to go to every show in her area when he toured for the first time solo. And she knows every song by heart 😅

liked by harrystylesfanpage and 20 others

↳ harrystylesfanpage That’s very interesting and good to know 👀

hsfan1 I found her while scrolling through Spotify a few months back, and I’ve been hooked ever since. So yeah, she is absolutely welcome here!

internet_troll1 You need to stop obsessing over this b*tch. She is using him, you blind idiot.

↳ harrystylesforever Just shut up 🙄

hsfan2 I like her. I like how happy Harry looked in those pap pics. So, I want her to be one of us.

billtherock Y’all are late to the party, but the party is still going! Welcome!

liked by harrystylesforever, harrystylesfanpage, yourfan2, and 16 others

yourfan1 People finally see how talented she is!

↳ internet_troll2 Fucking shut up. You can’t see talent even if it’s right under your nose 🤣

↳ yourfan1 And you spent an awful lot of time hating on people publicly even if you state you hate them. Logic? Nowhere to be seen.

liked by harrystylesforever, yourfan2, harrystylesfanpage, and 32 others

hsfan3 We will see if they both say something about the rumors or just laugh about us oblivious idiots xD

↳ hsfan4 Maybe the latter 😂

harrystyles Pretty flower ❤️

Liked by annetwist, gemmastyles, hsfan1, and 2,324,768 others | 429,637 comments

hsfan1 Uhm… 👀

jefezoff HARRY

↳ harrystyles What?

↳ jefezoff … Take a very close look at your IG profile.

↳ harrystyles …Oooops.

liked by hsfan2, hsfan3, yourfan1, and 1,342 others

↳ yourinstagram 💀

liked by jefezoff, harrystyles, yourfan3, and 219 others

internet_troll1 Dear lord, she probably pushed him to post this so she can gain more followers 🤢

internet_troll2 Can’t believe this b*tch is this stupid. She will get so much hate lol 🤣

↳ harrystylesfanpage And from who? You? Nobody cares about you.

liked by gemmastyles, hsfan3, yourfan5, and 430 others

hsfan2 Not sure if that was supposed to land here 😅

↳ yourfan1 Definitely not 🤭

lindathetree That’s my pretty bestie! Told you it would happen eventually, billtherock 😂

↳ billtherock Surprised it didn’t happen anytime sooner

liked by yourfan2, yourfan5, hsfan1, and 46 others

yourinstagram So, the entire world now knows what pictures you have of me.

↳ harrystyles Sorry, love x

↳ yourinstagram Mhm 👀

↳ harrystyles Ice cream to make it up to you? x

↳ yourinstagram You don’t have to make anything up to me, but I could never say No to ice cream 😚

liked by harrystyles, gemmastyles, harrystylesforever, and 100 others

↳ yn_and_harry They are so soft for each other 🥹

↳ harry_and_yn You just CANNOT tell me that they don’t love each other. I saw them strolling through Central Park—if the entire world had seen how Harry looked at her and YN looked at him, nobody would question this relationship 😠❤️

liked by yourinstagram, hsfan4, hsfan6, ynfanpage, and 98 others

hsfan3 Will you be at his NYC shows??? yourinstagram 😍

↳ yourinstagram 100% YES! 🥳

↳ hsfan3 Would it be okay to talk to you if I happened to see you? 👉🏻👈🏻

↳ yourinstagram Of course, lovie 🥺❤️

liked by hsfan3, hsfan1, yourfan2, and 56 others

gemmastyles It’s surprising how long this didn’t happen. Jeff and I had a bet going on; no one wins now.

↳ jefezoff We didn’t have a bet. It was only a conversation about this particular topic.

↳ gemmastyles A conversation doesn’t end with the words “I bet” 😇

liked by annetwist, mitchrowland, harrystyles, and 34 others

yourinstagram Well… Someone 👀 spilled the tea, so: look at my handsome man.

I’ve always been immensely proud of you, but tonight, it’s something else. To see what you’ve achieved over the past years… Mindblowing. I love you to the moon and back, to the depths of the oceans and the wide of the world. Words can’t express my love for you, H. To 14 more incredible nights ❤️

[harrystyles]

Liked by annetwist, jefezoff, hsfan1, yourfan2, and 547,629 others | 99,702 comments

annetwist I love you, my two loves ❤️

↳ yourinstagram ❤️❤️❤️

↳ hsfan1 She has Anne’s blessing—haters can back off. Anne’s blessing is like the verification symbol on IG for this relationship.

liked by hsfan3, hsfan4, yourfan1, and 9 others

jefezoff I’m also very proud of him.

↳ yourinstagram I’m also very proud of YOU.

↳ jefezoff Oh, thank you. Thank you. That’s too kind 😇

↳ yourinstagram Mhm 👀

liked by hsfan4, hsfan1, yourfan8, and 6 others

↳ hsfan1 Jeff, the compliment hogger 😂

hsfan2 According to her post, I don’t believe they’re “new” 👀

↳ hsfan3 Having the same feeling over here 🥹

lindatherock And you didn’t bring me with you, hmpf.

↳ yourinstagram You told me that you had to work!!! I asked you numerous times 👀

↳ billtherock That’s very true, Linda.

↳ lindatherock Still: hmpf.

gemmastyles Where did you venture off now??? 😂

↳ yourinstagram Jeff wanted to show me something—turns out this something was Harry during his break 🤷🏼‍♀️❤️

↳ gemmastyles I’m gonna wait here for you then 👌🏻

↳ harry_and_yn And another Styles who obviously gave her blessing. Could we please stop giving these two a hard time now? Thank you.

yourfan1 So happy to see you this happy!

gemmastyles He is the happiest with you ❤️

(YN stood right next to me and didn’t do anything except for looking—that’s all it’s needed to make him smile like that. She is a keeper.)

[harrystyles, yourinstagram]

Liked by hsfan1, hsfan2, hsfan3, yourinstagram, annetwist, and 2,384 others | 980 comments

hsfan1 Awwww 🥹 I love a happy!Harry

hsfan2 He looks so content with his life 😍

yourfan1 He makes her happy, she makes him happy - easy as that!

annetwist ❤️

yourinstagram Thank you, Gem 👉🏻👈🏻🥹

↳ gemmastyles I have to thank you, silly ❤️

mitchrowland There isn’t a chance you could bring some iced coffee with you? And maybe something sweet?

↳ gemmastyles YN already has that on her to-do list!

↳ pillowpersonpp A literal angel ❤️

liked by harrystyles, yourinstagram, hsfan2, and 78 others

yourinstagram Is this a Harrie-approved show outfit? 🤔

Liked by hsfan1, yn_and_harry, yourfan1, and 437,440 others | 87,001 comments

hsfan1 It’s giving fancy cowboy vibes 😍

hsfan2 APPROVED!

yn_and_harry He will love this!!!

lindathetree My pretty bestiiiiie ❤️

↳ yourinstagram my even more pretty bestiiiie ❤️

yourfan1 The beauty you are 😭❤️

↳ hsfan3 I envy Harry so much

blurryh Pretty girl ❤️

↳ yourinstagram Pretty boy ❤️

liked by blurryh, mitchrowland, gemmastyles, and 5 others

hsfan4 Definitely approved. I love this! Where did you get that blouse???

↳ yourinstagram Uhm… American Eagle I think? 😅

↳ hsfan4 Finally something I can afford, YES! Love you!

↳ lindathetree She is an American Eagle biatch. Almost her entire closet consists of AE stuff 👌🏻

liked by hsfan4, yourfan1, ynfanpage, and 108 others

harry_lambert You clearly never need me ❤️

↳ yourfan2 Harry L is here! 😱

↳ yourinstagram I could NEVER outdo your magic!

↳ harry_lambert Well, maybe you need to stop waving off my offers then!

↳ yourinstagram We’ll see 👉🏻👈🏻

↳ hsfan5 YN is so humble 🥺

harryismyman You’re so ugly, what does Harry see in you lol

harrystyles Love On Tour. New York City II. August, 2022.

Liked by yourinstagram, annetwist, hsfan1, hsfan2, and 2,329,070 others | 101,323 comments

hsfan1 Who wants to bet that he looked at YN? 👀

↳ hsfan2 He definitely did

↳ hsfan3 Yeeeep. That’s the smile reserved for her ❤️

annetwist Enjoy it ❤️

yourinstagram 🥰❤️

↳ harrystyles Can’t wait to see you x

↳ yourinstagram Front and center—as always ❤️

↳ harrystyles That’s my girl x

↳ harrystylesfanpage I live for their love 🥹

harryismyman Please reply to my dm, love!

↳ hsfan4 🤦🏾🤦🏾🤦🏾

internetroll1 He deserves so much better than yourinstagram.

internetroll2 Could Harry just break up with this stupid yourinstagram girl?

;

“We have a problem,” Jeff spoke right next to her and scared the living shit out of YN, who was in deep conversation with a small group of lovely fans, already impatiently waiting for her boyfriend to appear. With a hand pressed to her jeans-clad chest, the woman turned and stared up at the manager with wide eyes. “Dear avocado, Jeff!” He gently got a hold of her arm and urgently pulled her with him while she waved the group with boas around their necks, an apologetic smile on her face. “What’s wrong? Did someone die?” The manager huffed and only stopped when they had arrived in one of the underground hallways of MSG. “Nobody died, but the supporting act got last minute sick.”

YN’s lips parted at that; her mouth formed a soft O, and blinking, she tried to understand the situation. “Okay…? Do you have a backup?” He shook his head slowly, but the expression in his eyes didn’t sit right with her. “Unless someone agrees to jump in,” he now said, and the young woman felt her heartbeat quicken. Jeff didn’t need to explain this further to her, her mind already spiraling at the thought alone of making an appearance on the big stage. So, she started to shake her head—slow at first, but with growing desperation and urgency. “No, no, no.” She moved both hands up; her head continued to move from left to right, fast enough to give her whiplash. “I can’t do this, Jeff. You know I adore you, but… no.”

He followed the young singer as she took several steps back and threw her a pleading look. “Why not, YNN? You are great! You are a great singer! This could be a possibility.” It was almost comical that he didn’t see the controversy lying in it, the potential extent of hate she could get when doing what he asked of her. “That’s exactly the point, Jeff! Imagine what they would think when suddenly it’s me who stands on that stage! A stage prepared for my immensely famous boyfriend. Just… just give this a five-second thought, and you’ll see why I can’t do this. They will all think the same—that-that I’m using him as a launching pad for my own career before throwing him in the trash can like a half-eaten hotdog. But that’s not true!”

YN felt panic bubbling inside her at the prospect of losing Harry over the hate of this fandom which would ultimately attack not only her but him as well. And she couldn’t possibly allow that to happen.

Jeff gently grabbed her shoulders and moved her to look at him. “I know that that’s not true. The band knows. His family knows. You know. Harry knows. Everyone that matters know how much you love each other and that this is not a PR stunt or PR relationship. Who cares what the world thinks?” YN took a deep breath. “They will hate me. I could never use a social media account ever again, Jeff. And you know how much I love to interact with my fans. I… I can’t put that at risk.” His head shake let her breath slow down more and more. “Your fans will know the truth. They always do, somehow. The haters will lose interest soon enough, you know how they behave over time. And think of all those people out there. Many of them already like you because you make Harry so happy, everyone can see it. Remember how they cheered last night when he tried to find you in the crowd, and they helped him to see you between them. That’s all that matters to most of them—that he is happy.”

She took another deep breath and blinked up at him, unsure what to do. “But what if I fail up there?” Jeff grinned. “You’re a blast on a stage. It’s your second home, YN. Do you really think you could fail up there?” Her anxiety screamed Yes, but the realistic part of her brain only shrugged its shoulders because she had always lived for the stages of this world—even if it only was an aisle between bookshelves in the bookshop she worked ever since starting at and graduating from college.

So, all she did was nod once, and Jeff grinned even wider before ushering her to the technicians to provide her with an earpiece and a microphone.

—

“Uhm… Jeff?” Harry’s voice called through the underground hallway as soon as his eyes spotted his manager. The brunette raised a dark brow at the singer, and Harry held his phone up. “D’you know where YNN is? She doesn’t react to any of my texts, and I thought we would meet here before I went out,” he explained the situation to him—the my girlfriend is kinda missing in action situation.

But Jeff couldn’t really say anything because, at this moment, a voice, followed by booming applause and cheers, echoed through the long hallways. “Hey, everyone!” Harry looked confused as hell as he heard YN’s voice multiplied by a microphone and the sound system of Madison Square Garden. “What’s happening now?” He was followed by his manager and some bodyguards as he just made his way upwards to stand right next to the pit. His eyes almost pop out at the sight of his gorgeous woman standing on the stage, a huge smile on her face.

“I’m sorry to disappoint you because clearly, I’m not Blood Orange.” A laugh runs through the audience. “There was a last-minute sickness call, but we only wish them the best, don’t we? Let them hear it!” The people cheered loudly at that, and YN smiled even more widely. “I’m pretty sure they heard it till the other side of the river! And so, this only leaves the question of if y’all don’t mind if I play the supporting act for tonight, so we can greet Harry properly later on. Would that be alright with y’all?” She moved the mic to direct it to the people in front and around her. His fans cheered loudly, and a laugh escaped YN. “I didn’t quite get you!” Another move of the mic and the audience screamed their encouragement. “I suppose that’s a Yes! Thank you. Don’t worry if you only know a few or any songs at all. We still can have a great time together!” YN turned to the band, and at the nod of the drummer, she held her thumb up and grinned brightly.

Harry stood in constant awe on his spot, almost ignoring his fans, of whom some had spotted the singer, but he was too enthralled by his woman upstage, owning it like she was born for it. And in his opinion, she had been born to do exactly this.

As the first tunes of W.I.T.C.H. echoed through the hall, many of the audience cheered loudly, and even Harry whistled and cheered alongside them. “She ain't out to get you, but she's better on your side,” YN sang, and then, the people sang the refrain with her. “And she don't wanna be anybody else - She's a woman in total control of herself.—Oh my, you know this song?!—It's such a wonder to be under her spell - What a woman, in total control of herself.”

The singer continued to watch in wonder and almost didn’t realize that Jeff had patted his shoulder. “We need to get you ready,” his manager told him, and Harry reluctantly followed him, always throwing a look over his shoulder to see his girl glowing up there.

harrystyles Thank you for stepping in, my love. I’m so damn proud of you. This is your moment! x

[yourinstagram]

Liked by yourfan1, yourfan2, yn_and_harry, gemmastyles, and 1,221,001 others | 111,920 comments

gemmastyles What a banger!! Whoever that is, we all need to listen to her songs more often 👀👀👀

liked by yourfan2, yourfan4, hsfan5, and 113 others

↳ yourinstagram Geeeeeeem 🙈

↳ gemmastyles 😘🥰

↳ hsfan1 🥹

hsfan2 Best supporting act!!!

mitchrowland 🥳❤️

pillowpersonpp That’s my girl! 👸🏼

yourfan1 She seriously is born to do exactly this!

↳ hsfan3 Def! She was SO good upstage

internettroll1 💀💀💀💀

internettroll2 Untalented, ugly, unworthy of him 🤪

internettroll3 I just checked her social media accounts—she gained SO many new followers. Can’t tell me she isn’t dating him for precisely this.

internettroll4 Youre still my man, Harry. Leave this b*tch.

—harrystyles turned off comments for this post—

harrystyles My tired loves x

I always was very grateful for my fans and how we handle things on social media as individuals. But lately—actually, ever since my relationship got public knowledge—hateful comments have pooled here, and I will not tolerate a single word filled with hatred, especially if it’s directed toward this angel of a woman who makes me the happiest. I don’t want to exclude you, my longtime fans and supporters, from this part of my life after I finally feel comfortable enough to share this with you willingly. So, could we treat people with kindness again?

Thank you, x H.

Liked by annetwist, gemmastyles, hsfan1, harrystylesfanpage, and 9,247,851 likes | 338,996 comments

harrystylesfanpage Wow, you did it, people. You made him so upset that he needed to call y’all’s bullshit out 😠

liked by hsfan1, hsfan3, harry_and_yn, and 77 others

↳ hsfan1 I’m so sad🥺 She is the loveliest human being and doesn’t deserve all this hate

harrystylesforever True fans will protect you both!

ynfanpage Poor babies 😭❤️

hsfan2 They have a cat together 😭

↳ yourfan1 Everything screams for a long-term relationship. Can’t tell me otherwise.

annetwist ❤️

gemmastyles 😞❤️

hsfan3 Those haters never were true fans 🤬❤️

lindathetree Me and billtherock are very thankful that you take such good care of her and protect her from all that ❤️

↳ harrystyles It’s my duty x

liked by billtherock, annetwist, hsfan1, hsfan2, and 1,342 others

yn_and_harry We love you two! What’s your guys' cat’s name? She is such a pretty bean 🥺❤️

↳ yourinstagram Her name is Juniper, but we barely call her that. She probably wouldn’t react to it anyway

liked by harrystyles, annetwist, yn_and_harry, and 237 others

↳ yn_and_harry That’s normal 😅❤️

yourfan1 I’m so sorry you got so much hate, yourinstagram But Harry is there for you, obviously! ❤️

yourinstagram I love you.

↳ harrystyles I love you more x

↳ yourinstagram Nope, not possible ❤️

liked by harrystyles, ynfanpage, harry_and_yn, and 2,456 others

;

I’m not sure what I think about this one, but hey, it’s here, and I’m excited to read what y’all think. Hope you liked it <3 As usual: comments, reblogs, and likes are much appreciated!

taglist: @onecrazydirectioner @nyctophilic0vitnir

565 notes · View notes

azulera · 1 year

Text

Hello TikTok

Pairing: Marcus Rashford x Black Reader

Summary: Marcus joins TikTok, and you share your thoughts on his first post.

Notes: I wrote this a while ago and it was inspired by the first vid he posted on tiktok which I laughed at for days. He is such a dork (I'm in l*ve with him)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The sudden notification to your phone was unexpected, not because of the app it came from, but because Marcus’ name was attached to it. Settling deeper into the corner of the couch, you opened the link to the TikTok video and let it play.

The background was dark, and the footage was slightly grainy, but clearly showed Marcus in a black hoodie, kicking about in a nondescript patch of grass. There was a row of streetlamps behind him, but no eye-catching edits, background music or even TikTok sounds underlying the recording, only the rubbery whack of the ball against his trainers as he bounced it off them and up in the air. After a few moments, the ball flew from his feet and clattered into the camera.

“Yes, everyone— Marcus Rashford, here.” He suddenly spoke, the phone now in his hand and the camera focused on his face. The cheery, formal tone of his voice mismatched with the dark setting.

“And I am on TikTok.”

The video slowed to a stop with his face still in the frame, and the abrupt ending forced a burst of laughter through your lips. Was that all?

You played the video once more, raising the volume and screen brightness to make sure you’d seen and heard everything. The kick-ups could have been anyone’s suggestion, you thought on the second viewing, but the less-than-perfect lighting and straightforward script had your boyfriend written all over it. Still, you had many, many questions.

“Marcus, when did you post this?”

“Post what?”

He walked in the living room from the kitchen with a protein bar in hand, before plopping down onto the couch. He stretched his long frame out over yours, fitting the curve of your hip into his hand.

“This,” You said, flipping your phone screen for him to see his own face reflected back at him. He smiled softly.

“Oh, the TikTok? Just a minute ago. Go on and like it, though, repost it.” He grabbed for your phone, but you pulled it away, watching the video over again. On the screen, and in real life, you could see how proud he was of his creation.

“And you came up with the idea, then? Knocking the phone over with the ball?”

“Well, yeah. Why?”

“I’m just curious. It’s …” You bit down on your lip. The audio of the video continued playing from your phone in a loop. “You didn’t want to run it by anyone first? Even just me, or like, one of your video editing people?”

His eyebrows furrowed.

“What do you mean? I did run it by my team and them first, before I posted it.”

“And what did they say?”

“They thought it was cool. And funny, like. Wait - why’re you laughin?”

Your body shook lightly where Marcus held it, and you covered your mouth to spare his feelings, and mute the sound. He lifted his head up from your chest, unsure that the two of you were laughing for the same reasons.

“It is cool, innit? Don’t you think it’s cool?”

Words were impossible for a few moments, with your shoulders still vibrating with giggles and breath all but gone.

“You couldn’t have added a song at least?” You asked when air returned to your lungs. “Or some kind of audio, it’s dead silent in the back. And why did you end it like that? You could’ve done an outro or something.”

“But it didn’t need all of that, did it? It were supposed to be a short little thing—“

“Also what is ‘Yes, everyone?’” You continued. Marcus huffed and tried to leave the couch, but you held him close, still laughing as you did. “What are you saying yes to? And the camera angle is giving me uncle, grandpa energy, I can’t even–”

“Okay, okay! Low it.” Marcus sucked his teeth and set his jaw, raising on his forearms above you. “S’not that funny. I mean, it is but, not how you mean. I still rate it. It’s cool.”

He spoke like he meant to convince himself. You stared up at him for a minute, taking in the small rut creasing his forehead, and the near pout on his lips. The video was hilarious, there was no point denying it, but it was so innocent, earnest and slightly dorky – all things you loved about him – and he really was so pleased with his work. Even if your abdomen cramped from laughing, you would never have him change.

“You know what, baby? You’re right. The video is cool.” You pushed your face into his shoulder to try and quell the amusement still threatening to bubble over. “You are so cool. And so funny. Super cool and funny. ”

“Plus, it’s harder than it looks, you know. Aiming the ball like that.” He let his head fall back down to your chest. “And I did it one try.”

“Shhh, I know it is, I know. You are so talented. Come here.” He turned his head away from the half-laugh, half-kisses you attempted to press against his neck, but it only made you try harder.

“It’ll be viral by tomorrow.” He finally grumbled, tossing your phone onto the coffee table and allowing himself to be kissed. Soon he spread his arms to resume the previous cuddle. “You’ll see.”

#marcus rashford x oc #marcus rashford x you #marcus rashford x reader #marcus rashford fanfiction #football fanfic #football imagine #footballer x you #footballer x reader

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rogerswifesblog · 1 year

Text

Surprise surprise

A/N: here’s a random Drabble I wrote because of a few conversations with @jamneuromain after seeing this and many of this guys TikTok’s https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGJxkxWJn/ he’s on my fyp all the time. Like. Really. And for some reason this gave me major Stripper Steve vibes.

This Drabble is a part of the series “it’s all about the…”

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Sugar Mommy Reader

Warnings: none

Grinning, Steve walked into the kitchen where you’ve been drinking your coffee for the past few minutes, mindlessly scrolling through your phone. You still didn’t understand the hype behind Instagram but you did use it to follow some celebrities and movie updates. There were even some accounts that posted interesting facts about literally anything.

Seeing Steve’s huge and cheerful grin made you lower your phone as you already knew this meant he had something to show you. Or share with you some news. He definitely wanted your full attention.

“Look what I did-”, with that he held up his phone right to your face, nearly making you spill your coffee with the sudden move. The short video was him lip singing to a song. You looked up at him, noticing how he was watching the video with you, seemly proud of it. A big smile was on his face as he nodded his head to the beat of the music.

While taking a sip you watched it before it quickly turned into many short, slowed down clips of Steve in various positions, outfits and poses, everyone one of them sexier and more appealing than the other one. Not having expected this you coughed up your coffee, nearly choking on the sip as you spilled the drink over your clothes and nearly Steve’s phone but he pulled it away just in time.

After you stopped coughing you looked up at Steve with red cheeks from what just happened and Steve was also darkly blushing.

You looked at him for a second in silence before slapping his arm. “Steve-” “ouch why did you do that!” “A warning next time! Jesus, boy. What is that? Why did you make this video?” You still sounded a bit horse from the coughing, making Steve wince lightly. He really hadn’t expected for this to happen.

“No particular reason…just thought it’d look cool…and hot…I thought you’d like it”, he mumbled, looking down at his feet like a kid caught with their hand in the cookie glass. It actually made you chuckle. His sweet behavior. You really loved Steve for this.

“Baby, of course I like it, just…a warning next time, okay? You can’t just come up to me and show something like this without preparing me-I mean, look what happened. I’m wet and dirty”, as soon as you said those words you noticed the unintentional meaning behind it, making Steve’s head shoot up, a teasing smirk on his lips.

“So you’re saying it made you wet, mommy?”, he grinned cheekily, coming closer to you and wrapping his arms around you.

You both laughed at that quietly, Steve kissing your cheek and hugging you tightly, his head buried against your neck. “Sorry for making you spill your coffee…and making you choke, too. Did mean that. Just wanted to show you what I post-”

“You posted this?? Baby, I thought it’s just for me!”

Thank you for reading!

Support your writers and leave some feedback and reblog!<3 let me know how you liked it (and how you like the series so far)

Questions? HC ideas? Drabble ideas? Thoots? (For this au or in general) -> flood my inbox!😋❤️

Taglist: @slutforchrisjamalevans @joannaromanoff @marvel-wifey-86 @buckysteveloki-me @patzammit @barnesboo1967 @sebsgirl71479 @sapphire-rogers @hayleysimp @kestrafagnor wanna be tagged? Be active (FEEDBACK AND REBLOGGING) and let me know!

#it’s all about the…#steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers x female reader #steve rogers x you

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bad-surprise · 9 months

Note

⭐️directors commentary of your choice please?

i held onto this for a minute because i knew i wanted to wait until the fic was complete (same for museum, that’s sitting in my inbox for now)

apologies in advance, this is a long one.

but i thought you might

haladriel modern au | E | 135.4k | 26/26

but i thought you might (bitym) began as a promptfill i posted on december 9th, 2022— the day i created my fandom twitter account.

at very basic level, bitym is a story about purity culture and the impact it has on those who grow up within it, even if they believe they never bought into the conditioning. it taught me that i love writing about sex— particularly deeply psychological sex scenes that reveal new info about the characters and their relationship, motivations, and overall dynamic.

it really only exists because my husband had covid that week, and because i was exposed but tested negative we were isolating separately. i had a lot of time to fill and spent a lot of it daydreaming, listening to music, and writing little bits of a story in my notes app. there was a very clear moment where hal’s voice just clicked for me and the first chapter came together from there. chapters 1, 2, the last half of 4, and 5 were all written first, back when i thought it would be an 8k one shot. i still have the draft of this, along with another one shot version of it.

it was inspired by memories of high school, particularly one off-campus lunch senior year where a friend confessed that she and her boyfriend had sex and she enjoyed it and didn’t know what to do with that. i believe my response was “i’m pretty sure you’re supposed to like it,” but she started crying. hal and gal’s high school is largely based on the private religious school i attended, and when i imagine their campus, that’s the image in my mind.

i really struggled to find a title, and sort of impulsively chose a line from home by daughter because i thought that song captured the right vibe.

personally, the story only becomes something i’m not embarrassed by around chapter 6. i knew what i was writing towards at that point but only in vague terms. going back into hal’s pov there for the first time since chapter 2 really clarified things for me. i’m not proud of it until chapter 10.

note: spoilers for the entirety of but i thought you might below.

many of my favorite elements were happy accidents, including the introduction of luthien, the two year time jump in chapter 11, the entire diner scene, and hal going to therapy. in conversations with my husband, i was adamant for so long that bitym!hal would never go to therapy. i underestimated what he would be willing to do for gal.

i didn’t really know the ending until around march, and a key aspect of it changed while drafting the penultimate chapter. the original ending i had in mind was incredibly dark, much closer to the shark in your water. it was initially going to be a story about hal thinking he was free from the religious conditioning but turning out to be just as toxic as fin, and galadriel coming to terms with being trapped. i was terrified when this changed and so so scared that hal would lose empathy from readers because of what he did, but ultimately that doesn’t seem to have happened.

the process of writing felt like constant excavation. i felt my way through the story intuitively, with a very flexible list of some plot points in my mind, but i was pretty much flying blind here. i’m so glad it worked out alright in the end.

easter eggs/random bits of info

references

“but they say you have the voice of an angel” is a reference to the music of the ainur

many celebrian moments were inspired by tiktoks and reddit posts.

“the last person i dated was awful” from chapter 17 (i think?) is the only morgoth reference in the whole fic. i debated including him but it ultimately felt like too much work to add it in and i don’t think the story needed it.

when hal’s telling galadriel how he lost his virginity, he says “she had a boyfriend anyway”. this is a reference to the song sex by the 1975.

in chapter 18, the event the girls go to is a reference to revolve tour (the girls who get it, get it)

the conversation hal and gal have about the differences in sex ed for girls and guys at their school is intended to slightly reference “then why is it not gone from here?” in the show, which is largely how it felt for me to leave evangelicalism before recovering from a lot of the related trauma. i didn’t believe it anymore, so why was it still strangling me all the fucking time?

depression as anger turned inward comes from my therapist, who knows i used it in this fic.

takes 20 attempts for halbrand to get the ring right because 3 rings for the eleven kings + 7 for the dwarf lords + 9 for mortal men = 19 before he forges the one.

hal is an aeronautical engineer working in the defense sector. this is a reference to some legendarium stuff around sauron in numenor.

writing process + personal shit:

in the first draft, hal was morgoth’s son and there was a plot point involving the theft of the silmarils.

the nursing student line in chapter 1 is based on some people i knew at university.

i am too embarrassed to read chapters 2 and 3. like i just want to curl up and hide whenever i think about either of those chapters, i think they’re terrible.

there are many “deleted scenes” from bitym that just didn’t fit into the narrative in the end, so they live in the unused scenes folder in my scrivener project. one of these scenes— a description of hal’s apartment— actually ended up being used for museum, and another scene i deleted was reworked for chapter 7 of shark.

i wrote the infamous chapter 5 car scene in the middle of the night, during what felt like a dissociative state, because i knew if i wasn’t exhausted my inner critic would start shame spiraling due to my own religious upbringing.

every single purity culture experience in the text, with the exception of chastity club and the purity pledge, is something that actually happened in my life. the only reason i didn’t do a purity pledge is because i missed youth group that week.

“they cannot convince her she’s sinned” is 100% from my own experience of being surprised by my complete lack of guilt lol.

i really want to have a longer convo about the consent stuff in it because i’m fascinated by some of the responses i got to the chapter 5 car scene. some people were really angry with me for it, which was interesting bc i really had the archive warning on there because of the birth control tampering.

i fucked up the time skip in chapter 11 and added an extra year. this changed the story dramatically (and is why the ending ultimately changed) but i prefer the way it turned out. i also fucked up the age gap between fin and gal, and don’t ask me what grade celebrian is in bc basically i cannot do math to save my life.

i find it really interesting how many readers seem to think galadriel’s POV chapters are more reliable than hal’s, because i definitely see it the opposite way.

i get super nervous about the references to their jobs because i’m terrified of getting something wrong but definitely don’t know the ins and outs. i do research, but i still feel super inadequate there, which is why you never see her at work and only see him at work twice.

chapter 13 (diner scene) was so difficult to plan, but once i decided to use those two songs, it became fairly straightforward. it’s one of my favorite chapters in the entire story.

you probably know this by now if you’ve read chapter 25, but their first kiss being in a closet was 100% deliberate.

i’m so so proud of the sequence with the pregnancy tests in chapter 15.

i decided celebrian would be in this while writing chapter 6.

the drive home from the bachelorette party was written about five days after i started working on bitym.

i knew as soon as chapter 6 that hal would wait until celebrian was born to tell galadriel that he loved her, but holy shit it was so difficult to wait that long.

the scene I’m most proud of is the opening to chapter 23.

misc. in universe info:

the night out with elrond and miriel in chapter 22 stresses me out so much bc gal doesn’t understand what she’s doing and it’s such a horrible position for hal to be in, seeing how she’s basically asking him to come out to her before he’s ready. this all happens only a few days before galadriel leaves for the first time.

hal doesn’t know that galadriel doesn’t think they’re a couple until B+L’s wedding. his response when she tries to bring it up earlier is because he’s worried officially defining it its going to either set him up for failure, or scare her off completely, but in his mind, they were basically together together as soon as he said “yeah, i think i’ll keep you” in chapter 5.

there are subtextual references to substance use issues in hal’s family. this is why he doesn’t drink much or do drugs— though by his 32nd birthday his attitude is a bit more relaxed, considering that their second child is conceived while both of them are drunk lol

in chapter 12, galadriel left her car in accessory for too long and the battery died. hal is fully aware of this and totally could’ve just jumped her battery but he missed her and wanted an excuse to spend time with her.

galadriel’s apprehension about motherhood doesn’t come from a lack of interest altogether, but because the only model she’s really had is one of 100% loss of identity, which is something she’s not willing to do. initially, i planned on this being her ultimate fate and good lord i’m so happy i didn’t go there.

i’m very careful in hal’s therapy sessions to have him refer to “people” he’s dated/slept with, rather than “women.”

galadriel’s friends 100% thought she was sleeping with hal AND celeborn in high school, hence their confusion at her response to finding out they were sexually active then.

hal’s parents aren’t actually homophobic or biphobic, they just didn’t know how to handle that situation and so they sort of pretended it didn’t happen. and if you want to know what happened, it’s just your usual homophobic bullying— the boy he liked turned on him to avoid being a target himself.

hal has had panic attacks his entire life but wasn’t diagnosed with panic disorder until shortly before galadriel moved out for real. he’s very resistant to using rescue meds and thinks he should just be able to tough it out.

they split bills proportionally based on income, with hal contributing 66% and gal 34% around the time of celebrian’s birth. galadriel doesn’t know much about hal’s finances until they buy the house.

i loved seeing how responses to amarie changed as she challenged expectations in the later timeline. i feel really bad for her— it’s implied in the final chapter that she married fin when she was 20 and he was 24, and she dropped out of college as a result. what they’re struggling with by the end is the fact that she wants to finish her degree and has made peace with the fact that they don’t have kids— more of that will be in peppermint for sure.

another aspect in the background that i knew about but decided against mentioning is that celebrian was born just before covid, which is a huge part of why they fell out with galadriel’s family. hal’s health anxiety meant nobody was getting anywhere near his baby and they were not feeling that at all. this might come up a little in peppermint, we’ll see. i doubt i would directly mention covid, just the fact that both of them were working from home for a large part of celebrian’s first few months.

celebrian’s first word was fuck. hal insists it doesn’t count. gal disagrees.

both hal and gal can be read as neurodivergent. it’s revealed in peppermint that celebrian does have adhd. hal also can be read as meeting the diagnostic criteria for borderline personality disorder— that was unintentional but i think it makes a lot of sense.

significant influences on bitym

films/tv

like crazy

normal people

about time

saved

couples therapy

the worst person in the world

before midnight

lady bird

500 days of summer

non-fiction

leaving the fold: a guide for former fundamentalists and others leaving their religion by marlene winell

complex ptsd: from surviving to thriving by pete walker

hold me tight by sue johnson

adult children of emotionally immature parents by lindsay c. gibson

three women by lisa taddeo

fiction

normal people by sally rooney

beautiful world where are you? by sally rooney

little rabbit by alyssa songsiridej

the unbearable lightness of being by milan kundera

atonement by ian mcewan

musical theater

the last five years

spring awakening

once

my favorite lines

Fighting is foreplay, so they never fight fair. Grievances are grenades, painstakingly primed for maximum impact. If the situation escalates to all-out warfare, consequences take a brutal turn. All hope of a ceasefire hangs on her eventual surrender to submission. — chapter 8

“Stop fucking running from what you want,” he murmurs, slipping his free hand beneath her shoulders, golden hair tangled around his wrist and laced between his fingers as they sink into her skin. “You’re not scared of me, you’re scared of yourself.” The words sear into her with the precision of a cautery pen, burning through any vestiges of self-denial still humming in her mind, loosening each thought at the root. — chapter 10

Galadriel murmured the words over and over again, whispering them against his lips, pressing them into his mouth, until the taste of each syllable was as familiar to him as the salt of her tears. — chapter 11

“Deciding to leave is very different from deciding to not love you anymore.” — chapter 13

If Galadriel is sunlight, Celebrian is made from the stars. — chapter 21

“I’d be first in line at the gates of hell,” Hal says slowly, with all the steadfast solemnity of a vow or a prayer, “if it meant I could keep this beautiful fucking life of ours for just a little longer.” — chapter 25

“You can stop beating yourself up for this shit, honey.” Hal’s thumb brushes her temple. “It’s not on you to fix something you didn’t fucking break.” — chapter 26

Maybe Hal was right. Maybe these moments only matter because of their fleeting, ephemeral nature. Maybe that overwhelming ache she once believed would shatter her served as a method to hollow out space for feeling to inhabit— this precious alloy of quiet contentment and contagious joy, irresistible wonder and the recalcitrance of love, all bound together by a strand of defiant hope. — chapter 26

“I might never be able to heal the parts of you— of us, of our family, our life— that I’ve broken. But you have my word, Galadriel,” his voice drops, each syllable low and firm, carrying the weight of an oath, “I will keep trying— until my last fucking breath, until the end of the goddamn world.” — chapter 26

that was probably a lot more than anyone wanted to know haha, so i’ll stop myself there. this fic means so fucking much to me and i’m so so proud of it. i never thought i’d be capable of writing anything like it and it’s so overwhelming in the best way to know that it means a lot to other people too.

hopefully this answered a lot of questions, but my ask box is open for anything at all— i could talk about concepts in and the process of writing bitym for days (i’m usually holding back bc i don’t want to be annoying) so please feel free to reach out with whatever.

and again, thank you all for everything. you’re amazing.

#answered #my fics: bitym #my fics: but i thought you might #fanfic directors commentary #poeticmemory

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edensflaw · 2 months

Text

What Sleep Token Has Done for My Heartbreak

I am a relatively new listener of Sleep Token, only have listened to them since August of 2023. But man, when I tell you I have fallen deep and hard for this band, I mean it. I have joined subreddits and discords, I follow tags on tumblr, and so so many instagram accounts. They're music feels so deeply personal to me. The lyrics feel like they fell out of my heart with the emotion that emits from them.

August of 2023 is also when I experienced a very traumatic separation from my now ex-spouse. They confessed to multiple acts of infidelity after trying to work through an emotional/romantic affair they were having at the time. To say I felt betrayed is an understatement. We had been together for 16 years. All of my young adulthood I was with this one person. Unsurprisingly, I fell into a heavy depression.

At first, I discovered Bad Omens. My anger was raw and all encompassing, and Bad Omens seemed to capture that so perfectly. I listened to them non-stop for a long time.

And then I came across Sleep Token thanks to Tiktok. I had listened to them earlier that same year - just once, a few songs - and I remember just feeling sort of indifferent towards them. I honestly think my heart wasn't ready to hear or feel what they were saying. I knew the pain they sang of, but I was still in deep denial about my own relationship and the pain my partner was causing me.

When I listened to them again post-separation - it started with Granite. And the lyric that hooked me - line and sinker: "If you had a problem / Then you should've told me / Before you started getting all aggressive and controlling". At so many points in my relationship I was not being told things and that led to a lot of aggression. Naturally, i tried to control things because that’s a normal human thing to do when you sense that something is changing in a way you never wanted. Like when a stack of dishes starts to fall and you, rather uselessly, put your hands out to try to catch them, stop them from breaking. Ultimately your action is useless, the dishes still break despite your efforts. And it wasn’t even a conscious effort, just a reaction. And from that point on I feel deeper and deeper into my love of Sleep Token.

The next song I remember hitting me hard is Aqua Regia. “Oh, when I am done dancing to alarm bells/No wonder my ears are still ringing/And I am done fighting off change/No wonder my arms are still swinging”. Early into our separation, when my emotions were still very much raw I would find myself still fighting with my ex in my head - talking to myself and continuing fights we would have repeatedly. Alarm bells were still very much ringing in my head and even though the fighting had stopped between the two of us, I, myself, would find myself still arguing thin air.

In a moment in my life where I felt very much isolated and alone and removed from everything that had ever felt familiar, it felt so reassuring to know somebody, somewhere, felt what I was feeling. I felt seen. I felt heard. Especially coming from such a toxic relationship where I was not feeling heard or seen by my partner.

There are a lot of Sleep Token songs that seem an obvious choice when it comes to heartbreak. Missing Limbs is one of those songs. 'Cause it still makes my blood run cold/To remember what I did before’ The person I became in such a toxic environment is not someone to be proud of. I’ve talked in therapy a lot about how I struggle with being the person I thought I was when I know I’m capable of such horrible things. The environment really does make the person. ‘The stories that you never told to me’ A lot of our fights were about their lying and their secrets. How I would beg them to just talk to me and how much they would absolutely just shut down and shut me out. ‘And it still makes my blood run thin/To remember what you are to him/And I live like I've got missing limbs/For you’ And to remember what their affair partner means to them - it makes my heart drop into my stomach and my stomach drop into my gut; it makes my blood boil and brain go from zero to sixty. And yet, even with all the knowledge I have now of just how much my ex betrayed me - it very much feels like I’m missing a part of my physical body without them in my life. I have achieved a level of peace I haven’t felt in a while and I am proud of myself for getting to this point, but even with all of that something feels like it’s missing. Like a lizard discarding its tail.

I could probably go through every Sleep Token song and break down how each word relates back to me and what I was feeling. Blood Sport, Dark Signs, DYWTYLM, the Love You Want, etc. There’s very much a theme of eating, consuming, biting flesh, etc. in Sleep Token’s lyrics. I would’ve crawled inside my partner if it meant that we wouldn’t be separated. I would have consumed them. I let my love for them consume me, mind and body. I let them consume me. I trusted them so much I bared my stomach, the most delicate parts of me, and they tore into them like a wolf that hadn’t eaten in weeks, all the while telling me they weren’t.

The emotions Vessel presents when singing, it feels like such a dichotomy within himself. There is such a longing, a yearning, for what was, what is comfortable, the love he knows he could get if he made the right (or wrong) sacrifices. The yearning is a literal pain and that pain is often mistaken for love, but for the wrong reasons.

Then there’s those moments where the fog clears he realizes just how much Sleep has wronged him, used him and that makes him so angry, and rightfully so. There’s such a quiet rage that’s just bubbling beneath the surface. And when that rage comes out there’s almost a sort of regret that comes along with that. A regret for the relationship itself yes, but also regret for the way he acted while with Sleep, and regret for the anger he feels. Vessel's relationship with Sleep feels very familiar to me and my ex.

There was a post recently by melit0n about the song Jaws. In the tags of my reblog of that post I put "And if my love doesn't love me anymore I know Vessel is capable of love and maybe that means someone can love me like that too".

But it's more than that. I loved it like Vessel does/did. I gave so much of myself to someone that didn't deserve it and was ultimately so toxic and bad for me, much like Vessel's and Sleep's relationship. Sleep is narcissistic and toxic and is only using Vessel as a means for their own selfish ends. And I very much feel like that's how my relationship ended even if that's not how it started.

Vessel's lyrics feel so deeply personal to me because I've lived them. I've lived that feeling of being so consumed by love for another being that I was willing to let it destroy me, body and soul. Vessel knows the pain and struggle I feel: that feeling of longing and yearning for something you know is no good for you and at the same time the anger expressed because how dare they use me?!

This was a very long winded explanation and I’m sure half of it doesn’t even make sense. I’ve been thinking for a long time about putting down into words what this band and their music has done for me during these months of navigating this heartbreak and putting my life back together. They’ve been such an important part of it and even if I never get the opportunity to express what they mean to me to them directly, if you’ve read this far into this already long post at least someone else maybe gets it.

Thanks for reading, friend. Because yes, if you’ve read this far and this deep into my life, we are friends now.

#personal #heartbreak #sleep token #sleep token band #sleep token vessel #toxic #relationship #break up #divorce #separation

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kaydenverse · 1 year

Text

kinds of music call of duty character listen to but it's based off of my music taste

genre: fluff!

word count: just under 900

content warnings: none i think? just my very wild music taste projected onto my boys

a/n: i got bored and way too invested in making this to not post it so enjoy! i used my music taste as well as a little bit of my boyfriends for a little more range. also so sorry i keep just disappearing college is kicking my fucking ass.

kyle “gaz” garrick

he always has a pair of headphones on him when he can, has a mini speaker he frequently uses in his office on base, definitely listens to music the most out of the group, can't sing but he’ll sing anyways, often jams out with soap and share new songs with each other, listens to a bit of everything but tends to listen to rap, r&b, and indie (also a little bit of bedroom pop he’s got a lot of favorites okay) the most, he can do several tiktok dances pretty well but he gets embarrassed doing them in front of others, he’s very me coded

favorite artists (in no particular order):

flo millie

bruno mars

sza

the weekend

lil uzi vert

the notorious b.i.g.

some songs on his playlists:

pay day - flo milli ft rico nasty

hypnotize - the notorious b.i.g.

low - sza (he thinks this song is so underrated and so do i)

after last night - silk sonic

redbone - childish gambino

everlong - foo fighters

john "soap" mctavish

a close second on who listens to music the most, listens most when he works out and likes to have background noise while he does just about anything, loves movie soundtracks, god awful singer and proud, him and gaz singing together is torture in the funniest way possible, very wide music range but nu metal and rock are his top categories, soap loves when the whole team sits decides to sit in a conference room and wordlessly work on their paperwork together while music fills the silence between them

favorite artists (in no particular order):

beyoncé

deftones

slipknot

coraline soundtrack

the smashing pumpkins

poppy (hear him and me out okay)

some songs on his playlists:

bloodmoney - poppy

me, myself, and i - beyoncé

bullet with butterfly wings - the smashing pumpkins

cha cha - freddie dredd

other father song - they might be giants (yes the coraline song. it’s good okay.)

clay - the garden

simon "ghost" riley

does like music quite a bit but doesn’t listen as often as gaz or soap, sometimes silence is overwhelming for him so he uses it as background noise to stay relaxed, won’t sing (he can just barely sing well like not a bad singer but he’s not getting a record deal even if he tried), has no particular favorite genre but has a decent range, he describes his music taste kinda weird but in a good way (just like me fr)

favorite artists (in no particular order):

insane clown posse

michael jackson

pierce the veil (they’re a guilty pleasure of his)

amy winehouse (i once made a cod characters as tweets on tiktok and ghosts tweet was “amy winehouse was right, what kind of fuckery is this” and now i just hc he listens to amy)

nirvana

type o’negative

some songs on his playlist:

hold on till may - pierce the veil

chicago - michael jackson

you know i’m no good - amy winehouse

southern nights - glen campbell (so good for what)

21 guns - green day

sugar we’re going down - fall out boy

captain john price

doesn’t often go out of his way to listen to music but still listens enough that he has favorites and keeps playlists, HAS to have his own music playing in the car if he’s driving though (which he usually is and this is a well known rule), quite the singer if he actually tries tbh but he doesn’t often try lmao, primarily like’s songs from ‘his time’ as he calls it (john you are 37 not 60), he doesn’t really have a favorite genre but will say rock if asked (doesn’t like pop much tho)

favorite artists (in no particular order):

queen

fleetwood mac

metallica

black sabbath

aerosmith (play dream on when he’s drunk and he’ll give you a full performance)

prince

some songs on his playlists:

chain - fleetwood mac

war pigs - black sabbath

let’s go crazy - prince

cherry bomb - the runaways

rooster - alice in chains

even flow - pearl jam

rodolfo "rudy" parra

listens mostly when he does chores or to calm himself when he’s anxious (which is sometimes just before missions), he’s always open to new music suggestions, his singing voice is absolutely beautiful and he’ll sing and hum along as he does chores, guilty pleasure is bedroom pop and indie

favorite artists:

laufey

the marías

whitney houston (he misses her so much cause me too)

tame impala

pink panthers (because i said so)

tv girl

some songs on his playlist:

slow down - laufey

little by little - the marías

the blonde - tv girl

show me how - men i trust

take a picture - filter

heart to heart - mac demarco

alejandro vargas

when he listens to music he listens to it LOUDLY, loves to have music playing at home while he cooks, he’s not sure if he’s going deaf because his profession requires him to constantly be around guns or because of how loud he listens to his music in his headphones, karaoke enjoyer, decent singer if he tries (price is a little better than him, just by a little), he’s an “anything but country” kinda guy

favorite artists:

bad bunny

doja cat (i’m not elaborating)

kali uchis

rihanna (he can’t resist)

arctic monkeys

elton john

songs in his playlist:

i’m still standing - elton john

shut up and drive - rihanna

tití me preguntó - bad bunny

bills, bills, bills - destiny’s child

promiscuous - nelly furtado ft timbaland (yes he knows all of timbalands parts)

poison - bell biv devoe

#i love them so much #my darling boys #call of duty headcanons #call of duty #kyle gaz garrick #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #captain john price #rodolfo rudy parra #alejandro vargas #cod #cod fic #cod headcanons #incorrect call of duty quotes #kayden writes #call of duty fluff #cod fluff

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magicwithineleteo · 7 months

Text

things i wish you said by sabrina carpenter & i’m sorry by joshua bassett give me rina’s individual perspectives had gina moved away (the 3 times she almost did) .

like ricky being regretful of never stopping her when she left after hsm in season 1, or if he WAS too late at her press conference in season 4 and never got to tell her that he loves her.

and gina being heartbroken about ricky never saying that he had feelings for her too after she moved in s1 or if she was heartbroken if ricky had never said i love you to her and she went to new zealand.

idk just those 2 songs give me rina angst but their individual povs about their pining pain. ricky (i’m sorry) being regretful of never telling gina how he feels & gina (tiwys) being devastated of what she thinks is one-sided love.

she didn’t know (s1-3) that ricky felt the same all along, or rather, was getting there. he himself didn’t even know until it was too late.

i’m gonna break down the lyrics for both songs for ricky and gina, the red is for gina moving in s1 and the blue is for gina going to nz in s4. purple is for both situations . some lyrics will have both red, blue, and purple, or just one. i may just not include a lyric or two if they don't apply so

so the canon compliant/au would be:

“i wouldn’t quit on us” scene and gina leaves forever, instead of staying w ashlyn

ricky being too late. gina ends up going to new zealand and they end up breaking up (how and why? idk. the point is is that she left before he could say that he loves her)

first we’ll dive into ricky's perspectives (i’m sorry). gina’s will be in another post

(btw this is not me shipping josh and sabrina or any way or speculating that these songs are about one another. this is just me appreciating the parallels from songs from 2 of my favorite artists)

i thought about what i would say but i’m two years too late

ricky let gina go. he just let her hug him. he let gina confess that she likes him, and he let her go. he’s too late. now she’s gone, and she’s never coming back. gina didn’t return his texts after she moved. (in the show and probably in this au) he’s too late. she’s gone. and he didn’t stop her when he got the chance. he didn’t realize how he felt with gina. if only he could go back in time.

ricky was too late. maybe a few seconds. minutes. hours. days. weeks. months. now, 2 years. gina went to new zealand and she’s a star. the epitome of a star. she’s achieving her dreams. but he never got to tell her that he loves her. he had it all prepared. the speech he practiced countless times, that kept getting pushed back. he ran for his life in those hallways, knowing that he needed to do this before she leaves. he came to an abrupt stop, after yelling if he’s too late. he was. he stopped to see the limo driving away. he dropped the electric guitar in shock. he didn’t get to say i love you.

he raced to the airport in his little orange buggy, where she changed his life. she’s seemed to change his life countless times, one of them being here. homecoming. he probably broke every driving law there ever was to get to the airport.

but he was too late. she wasn’t there. she was gone.

i can't imagine how you're doing these days

gina doesn’t respond anymore. she stopped as soon as she left. gone like she never came. the air felt hollow without gina porter. school felt longer. rehearsal wasn’t fun anymore. he lost someone who he took for granted, who he should’ve told how he feels. he still follows her on instagram and tiktok, still comments on her posts. she’s still as incredible as ever. but he doesn’t know how she’s doing anymore. they used to tell each other certain things, that no one else knew. he’s not that for her anymore.

ricky keeps up with gina constantly. it’s hard to forget about the love of your life. he follows her every social media, but can’t bring himself to text her. he sends the occasional “hey i’m so proud of you” and congrats, but he can’t bring himself to actually text her. how can you just text the love of your life? she doesn’t even know that you think of her that way. you can’t just say it over texts. or over a phone call. and he doesn’t have enough money to fly to new zealand himself to play her love you forever. and her career is set. new zealand for romeo and juliet was just the beginning. he knows gina is never coming back. once the world saw her, the star she is, he’d lost her. she deserves the world and its love, he can’t hold her back from that. he needs to let her go and let her do her thing. he had to push down everything he felt, the feeling of needing to fight for her. he needed to let her shine. but he really missed her. and selfishly, he wanted her to stay. but he knew she couldn’t not take this opportunity. he needs to be supportive, even if that means she won’t be in his life anymore.

sure, it wasn't perfect back then i’ll be first to admit but it was better than being strangers again

ricky never saw gina coming. in the beginning of the year, he was set on figuring things out with nini. but after a conversation with a random beautiful stranger in the stairwell, everything changed for him. and their road was somewhat rocky. they both had this understanding of each other, that he’d never found anywhere else. well, he did come for her on homecoming, for some reason. he realized that bothered him so much, because he thought gina was smarter (and deserved better) than ej. he thought she wouldn’t do him like that. he doesn’t completely know why he acted the way he did. but atleast she spoke to him. atleast, whenever things were hard, they spoke. now, it’s complete silence as gina tries to move on from ricky and ricky comprehends his feelings.

ricky had much different expectations for his senior year. he thought he would be happy, gina is his GIRLFRIEND :) and yes that did happen, but the twists and turns of his year, the secret dating, mack alana, hsm3, hsm4. all of it. he didn’t see that coming. but him and gina made it out. they were both struggling, but he knew they both were each other’s priorities and would never abandon that. yeah, he was jealous of mack, yeah her mom didn’t like him, yeah he missed her. of course he did. yes he probably hurt her, but they got through everything. with gina in nz, her career skyrocketing, they barely got time to speak. even a quick text still gave ricky buzz. but it was never like how it was before.

i’m drunk too late talking to the moon, writing songs i can't sing to you

just for a moment. well that was technically for nini, but ever since big red put that thought into his head, that it was about gina, now that he thought about it, it really applied more to her. he wished he could sing his feelings to her. like he did with when there was me and you. he was just so excited because she was the only one to support his idea, and no one ever did that for him. he needs her.

3 words. love you forever. he never got to sing it to her. and now he regrets it every damn day. and he knows he told nini that he kicked himself everyday for not telling her he loves her too, but this is NOTHING compared to that. this was soul crushing. gut wrenching. as if someone snatched every piece of happiness he had. he didn’t get to tell her that he loves her, and he'll probably never get that chance ever again.

ever since that day, the things i didn't say, they haunt me

he let her walk away. he didn't stop her. he let her leave his life. he didn't even try to stop her. was he in denial? was he distracted? did he not realize, that the significance he thought nini had in his life, actually belonged to gina? he didn't fight for her to stay. even if she couldn't stay, atleast he could say that he put up a fight. but he didn't, because he took her for granted, and realized how he felt too late. he wishes he could go back in time and just do something to let gina know that he really liked her.

he didn't get to say i love you. he's so sure of how he feels, he knows gina is his forever. but he never got to tell her, and probably won't ever get to, because gina is a star and is living her dream. who is he to come in the way of that?

and i know that i'm to blame, so go ahead and blame it on me

gina blatantly told him how she felt. she wouldn't quit on them if she wasn't moving away. he didn't respond. he didn't verbally reciprocate. now he's paying the consequences, looking for gina everywhere he goes, only to realize that she was nowhere to be seen. he'd lost her. he let her slip through his fingers.

gina did nothing wrong. she followed her dream. he was too late.

i know that i'm too late, but i'll say it anyway, i'm sorry. though it's far too late

[ricky] gina, i'm so sorry. for not realizing how i felt. for not telling you that i felt it too. for letting you go easily. it may not be of any purpose, but you deserve an apology. i'm sorry. i would do anything to turn back time and fix everything. somehow beg your mom to let you live with me, if you have to. and that may be selfish of me, but i just can't let you go. ever.

[ricky] i love you, gina. full stop. i never got to tell you that. the speech i prepared, spent hours rehearsing and perfecting, the song that i wrote, anxiously waiting for the right moment to tell you. but that moment never came, because i was too late. i'm so sorry gina. i love you.

and it was me, it wasn't you it's cliché, but it's true i wasn't thinking how i usually do

[ricky] gina did nothing wrong. she feels so deeply and bravely. she's fearless, so strong, so amazing. she did nothing. it was all me.

and is your momma doing well? or does she hate me still?

terri porter never liked ricky. he learned from gina that she wasn't supportive of her dating, let alone ricky. he knew she thought he was unreliable (not the first time he's heard that) and didn't have a stable future to support gina with. she was the one who told ricky about nz, and while she said sorry, she didn't look sorry. she was the one who was egging mack onto gina. ricky just hopes that now, she likes him more than she did before. but he has no way of knowing. maybe she's happy now that gina is away from him, alone with mack across the world, shooting a movie as one of the most well-known couples in history.

and if you ever hear this, i hope you know that i'm not proud of who i've been

ricky wasn't proud of the way he handled gina's departure. well, in a way. he knew he was never going to see her again, and she stopped returning his texts. he did his best to shut down the gina portion of his brain as what was the use? he was just going to be heartbroken that she's gone. might as well focus on himself now. and look! nini is interested in him again, and he's back to being who he always was. but then gina showed up. unexpectedly. and rocked his whole world in just one night. he wished he told gina how he'd felt. so desperately. but he had just told nini before that he loved her. maybe it was like a hail mary of somesort. anyway, he just...regrets everything.

and if i see you again, i hope you know that i wish you nothing but the best my biggest regret

will he ever see gina again? would she appear out of thin air, like she did in opening night? he’s not sure. he wished he’d realized how he felt earlier. maybe they would’ve still been as close as they were.

ricky knew that him and gina were forever, but he also knew that she deserved the world and she was finally getting it. he’ll watch her with a smile on his face, endlessly proud of her. even though he’ll always regret he didn’t tell her that he loves her. he was certain that she’s his soulmate, especially after he found out that she auditioned for hsm because of him last year. he’s certain that she’s his forever, but knows he needs to let her be the star she is.

ricky will probably never get over gina porter. he regrets what he never said everyday. he hopes he’ll get a chance to tell her one day. he’s sorry. he loves her.

well now i’m very sad. i’ll make another post w gina’s pov soon :)

#hsmtmts #rina #hsmtmts rina #ricky x gina #ricky bowen #gina porter #analysis? kinda idk

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