#i need you guys to look at this one from the aggie too.

[dilfl0v3rss]

Hear me outt 🌝 - jealous ony .. and y/n gets a lil lesson

yes yes yesssssss😩

all mine

cw: car sex, public sex!!

word count: 1.8k

── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱───────

ony isn’t the jealous type, having lots of confidence in your love for him. he trusted you with his life and expected you to do the same with him so if there was an issue that had him feeling a little more possessive then it usually had barely anything to do with you. it was these thirsty ass niggas.

“baby please go sit the fuck down. too damn early for you t’be irritating me.” it was nine in the morning and you decided i’d be fun to give ony a little show in the living room, twerking and singing along to different songs playing on youtube. right now the princess dianna remix was playing and you was sitting in his lap, bouncing up and down as if you were riding him. “cmon boy i know you wanna touch all dis.” hands raking all over your body as you looked down at his bored face.

ony wasn’t trying to do nothing but smoke a wood with his breakfast and you were ruining that by putting your tiddies all in his face. “mama go somewhere wit allat before i spank you furreal.” his deep voice rumbled from his chest as he lightly pushed you off of him. this man clearly had an attitude, but you knew his stuck up ass wasn’t gon say nothing about it. “what’s wrong papa? why you so aggy?” you were trying to get him to communicate with you, but quickly changed your mind once he got to sucking his teeth, acting as if you were being a pest or something.

rolling your eyes, you started to say something smart, but we’re cut off by the sound of ony’s ringtone. connie’s contact came up and the way your man moved to grab the phone pissed you tf off. “yoo?……nah i’m just chillin at the crib rn…..of course gang we out.” your hands instantly gravitated towards your hips, weight being supported on one leg as you gave him a stank face. “you out where?”

once again, this sassy ass man sucked his teeth before replying. “finna go hoop wit the guys.” this had to be some type of sick joke. there’s no way this man, YOUR man, the one who literally had an attitude five minutes ago, was suddenly prepped up and ready to go run around with his little friends, but couldn’t even have a little fun with you.

“what about me? you don’t wanna stay wit me today daddy?” voice softening as you leaned down to ony’s face. you looked into his brown eyes as you waited for him to fold. he stared right back at you, licking his lips before his phone buzzed once again, ruining the moment as you seen his group chat start to blow his phone up with messages. “you can come wit me ma, but i wanna go hoop.”

what a fucking joke. you pushed yourself of off where your arms were rested before walking to your room, hips swaying with attitude. you wanted to go to target anyways so you decided you’d go to the park with him just this once to get what you wanted, but you had no intention of speaking to this man until he gave you the attention you deserved.

you sat on the park bench, watching ony get all sweaty and sexy playing with his friends. “cashhh bitch! y’all niggas suck i’m finna start putting money on this shit.” ony chuckled as he watched eren and reiner holding their hands on their knees, clearly out of breath from getting their ass whooped again.

“man fuck you. you and connie don’t even need to be on the same team cause y’all mothafuckas played in high school. if we was on that field you know damn well me and rei would be whooping that ass.” eren and reiner dapped each other up before each of them went to go get some water. ony approached you on the bench, shirt discarded somewhere near the courts, chest glistening with sweat as he practically snatched the water from in front of you and drank it.

“excuse me you fucking beast. at least ask.” you reached to snatch the water back, but he just held it higher so you couldn’t reach, giving you a warning glacé. “girl watch your mouth ‘fore i embarrass you in this park.” you rolled your eyes, plopping yourself back in your seat and pulling out your phone. “just go play wit ya little boyfriends ony.” you mumbled, texting on your phone as if you said nothing.

ony clearly didn’t hear you, walking back to go set up another game. “excuse me. this seat taken?” you turned around with attitude, still pissed at your stupid ass boyfriend. when you looked up at where the voice was coming from you were surprised to see a very handsome older man staring back at you. “nah you good. s’just me.” the man smiled at you, gladly taking a seat while digging in his back for his sneakers. “aww that’s a shame. why’s a pretty girl like you at the park all alone?”

you were going to correct him and let him know that you meant alone on the bench, not alone at the park, but your words were soon forgotten. “i’m zeke, eren’s brother. you a friend of his?” you nodded your head, voice stuck in your throat as zeke chuckled at your lack of reply. “you don’t talk much do ya? that’s fine. how about you give me your number and i’ll do all the talking.” as handsome as he was, you were a loyal woman and only wanted to be with one man.

you opened your mouth to politely shoot him down when you were interrupted. “nah she good.” ony’s lower stomach was was right behind your head as you and zeke looked up at him. face showing signs of irritation as he stood over you with his arms crossed on his chest. zeke held his hands up in defense as he practically rats you out. “i mean no harm, the pretty lady said she was here alone so i asked for her number. i had no idea.”

you looked up at your boyfriend, giving him a shy smile as you practically smelled the jealousy coming off of him. “uhh we’ll since that’s outta the way, you guys got room for one more?” zeke stood up, clearly uncomfortable with the tense energy being emitted from the both of you right now. “go ahead man, m’just leaving.” the blonde man gave him a small nod before leaving the two of you alone. “baby it’s not what is lo-”

“get in the car mama, we going home.”

the two of you didn’t even make is home, legs spread in the passenger seat as ony had one hand caressing the back of your neck while the other was buried deep in your panties. you’ve tried explaining the situation many times, and he seemed to understand what really happened, but he still fingered you with so much vigor that you couldn’t help but feel he was upset with you. “p-please papa i didn’t do anything wrongggg. it was just mis-miscommunication.”

his fingers dug into you deeper, nodding to you in understanding as he sucked hickies into your neck. “i know mama. i know. it’s just…just-” “jus’ what daddy? what i do?” a soft sigh left your lips at ony’s fingers left your hole, lifting to your clit before rubbing it slowly. “ion like seeing you talk to men ion know.” his fingers moved faster, making you shake under his arm as your release approached.

“i didn’t k-know. m’sorryyyy” your climax was at the tip of your tongue, but before long it was ripped away. ony leaned back in his seat before pulling his shorts and boxers below his hips. dick standing tall against his stomach as his hands moved towards your hips. “it’s okay princes. ima teach you, and make sure you never forget.”

though ony had a soft smile on his face, his grip on your hips was tight as he lifted you over the center console. your sundress was bunched up at your stomach so your boyfriend had easy access to your pretty pussy. he waisted no time ripping your panties in the middle and lining himself up with your tight entrance. “no screaming, no running, no crying, understand?”

before you could answer a scream erupted from your throat as ony slammed you down on his dick. “the fuck i just say mama?” large hands squeezing your ass tightly as he continued bouncing you up and down on his lap. lewd moans flew from your lips as you felt how delicious your walls felt against him. “i know it feel good, but i need you to stay quiet f’me okay? we still in public.” your eyes migrated toward the tinted windows, getting a good view of the still occupied park as well as you friends playing basketball.

“i’ll be quiet, promise.” your lips connected, dancing sloppily with each other before ony spoke into your mouth. “good girl.” his dick began kissing your cervix, palms taking up most of the space of your ass. “you mine right?” the two of you were eye to eye as he moved his hand to your neck, a silent command for you to bounce on your own as he continued thrusting from under you.

“y-yes daddy. only yours.” ony smiled at your response, rewarding you by angling his hips upward in the way that makes you want to melt into him. “this my pussy ain’t it?” he took your wrists, holding them behind your back as the two of you made love chest to chest. you moaned his name repeatedly like a prayer until you felt the urge to pee. “your heart, mind, and body. who’s is it?”

you felt your climax once again, this time stronger than before. pussy already leaking so much that it wet the seats under you as you continued fucking yourself onto ony’s dick. he knew you were close when you clenched tightly around him, clearly holding your release in so you can ask for permission. a wide smile crept into his face as he watched how obedient you were. “answer me and you can cum mama. who you belong to?”

“y-you daddyyy.” usually this answer would’ve satisfied him, but your boyfriend was in a different type of mood today. “nah princess say my name. my real name.” your pussy fluttered around him in delight, loving every second of this moment as you began kissing up his chest. ony shivered under you when you reached his neck, stopping right behind his ear. “i’m all y-yours. on-onyankoponnnn.”

your orgasm crashed down in waves, making you shake as your juices ran down his thighs. your boyfriend wasn’t far behind you, shooting his load deep inside you while holding your body on his. “that’s my good girl. never forget that either.”

#aot onyankopon #onyankopon x black reader #aot x black reader #onyankopon x reader #aot #aot smut #onyankopon x black!reader #onyankopon aot #onyankopon smut #onyankopon

[lemmetreatya]

Reiner is the perfect parent for the terrible twos. He's already incredibly patient and he understands that your child is experiencing a lot of big mood shifts and frustration about not being able to fully convey their needs just yet. Plus Gabi was way worse at their age. If Rei can survive that, he can survive anything.

Papa Rei is such a beautiful concept although one thing I believe different here is that yes, he’d be the perfect parent to handle the lil ones but I believe that’d only be the case post-first child.

So yeah, the off times he looked after Gabi he was so good at keeping her entertained and not-aggy, but his the anxiety that came with having his own first Terrible Twos over whether he was doing it right was horrendous. Because it’s not like he could just awkwardly return the child if it started being too much for him to handle — this was his kid and his constant responsibility — especially if you were out for the day.

but I do think any Terrible Twos then after he’d be fine with because he’s learnt the skills. You’re right though!! Reiner being a naturally patient man who understands how the lesser guy feels would give him the upper hand in these scenarios. However, I do believe there’s some things with parenting you can only learn once you’ve experienced it the first time!

“Sit down, sweetheart.”

Reiner tried to keep his voice as light as usual. He knows once any hint of agitation shows through it’d be harder to control the answers he got from his two year old henceforward.

Banging a foot against her highchair with a tear stricken face, you and Reiner’s daughter bounced in her seat as she screamed up towards her father.

“I wan’ it! I wan’ it!”

“I hear you.” Reiner slides the used chopping board into the dishwasher. “But you already chose to eat your after-dinner snack at lunch time so there’s no more for the rest of the night.”

“But he!…” The young girl points towards her older brother, who by now, was used to the thunderous tantrums of his younger sister.

There wasn’t much context to her pointing but Reiner could figure out what she was trying to voice.

On the other side of the table, sat her elder brother who was quite engrossed in one of the superhero cartoon series he usually watched once he had completed his homework. What his sister seemed interested in however, was the pot of chocolate moose he was eating from.

“I wan’ it! He have…”

Reiner shook his head whilst making his way towards the cupboard to get out a few tupperware containers to pack a bit of today’s dinner for tomorrow’s lunch.

“You can’t have your brother’s dessert, sweetheart. That’s his.”

Reiner’s son, who was a good seven years older than his sister, shrugged at the mention of her being denied his treat. In spite of her, he took a large scoop of the moose and ate the dessert, an exaggerated large hum of delight leaving his lips.

His sister’s focused was turned to him.

“Maybe.” He said with a quipped tone, smacking his lips. “If you saved your dessert earlier and didn’t have two for lunch, you’d have some now.”

The younger girl was unable to understand the entire premise of what her brother was telling her but she knew she was being told something which opposed her having a third moose of the day.

There was a delay in her reaction, a moment of silence, as her eyes were wide, her breath was haggard from crying and her blocked nose forcing her to breath through her mouth.

But Reiner could tell when the words finally computed in her brain because she started screaming, and in turn, fisted several hits at her father who happened to be passing by at the time.

Immediately, the blonde placed the tupperware containers down and crouched to her eye level, his face serious as he took a hold of his daughter’s wrist mid throw.

“Hey! Hey! We don’t hit. Okay? We don’t hit anyone, even if we’re upset.”

Reiner’s words were stern but he had to season his words with salt because shouting at her wasn’t going to get anything through.

Even though her crying had momentarily resolved, he could tell she was still upset. Reiner realises that, yes, even though she ate her desserts in an untimely manner, it would still be harsh to deny her a sweeter after dinner snack and break her routine simply because of that.

In favour of practicing safer learning spaces, Reiner knows he was going to have to come up with a solution.

Reiner moved his hold from his daughter’s wrist to her hand instead. Rubbing his thumb over her the whole back of her palm, he gave a proposition.

“You can’t have anymore chocolate moose but what if daddy cut you up some cotton candy grapes instead?”

The girl’s eyes carried the calculation of her choices.

Her eyes flicked towards her brother’s dessert once again before casting them down towards the table. Placing her unoccupied thumb into her mouth, she sniffed before giving an answer.

“Coyon can… gapes.” She finally resolved.

A mental weight had lifted off of Reiner’s chest.

“You want some grapes? Yeah?” He reaffirmed.

His daughter nodded, her face however downcast and sullen as she wordlessly continued to suck on her thumb. She normally got like this after a tantrum — drained and somehow lethargic — so Reiner wasn’t concerned.

Although once Reiner had risen from the dining table to access the fridge, his son momentarily looked away from his tablet before pointing his spoon in his younger sister’s direction.

“Haha! You didn’t get any moose.” He sing-songed, his tone boyishly mocking.

His sister, half-awake, made a jeering noise in his direction but she didn’t have to defend herself again concerning Reiner stepped in.

“And you.”

At the sound and change of his father’s authoritative voice, Reiner’s son ceased all juvenile trickeries and looked towards his father with wide eyes. Reiner himself had his head poked out from the fridge door as he gave his son a stern stare.

“I’ve warned you about teasing your sister. You’re older and should know better.”

With a face of utter confusion, the boy quickly looked to his sides before skittishly pointing towards his sideways leaning younger sister.

“But it’s her fault sh—”

“This isn’t a discussion.” Reiner finalised.

The bite in the boy’s argument died at the back of his throat at Reiner’s words. His father wasn’t usually a demanding person so he knows in hearing that, he’d crossed the line.

Slumping in his chair and turning back towards his tablet, he mumbled.

“Yes, Dad.”

There was a mouldy silence in the air as Reiner started to cut the grapes. Seeing as his daughter had tired herself out and currently didn’t have anything in front of her to stimulate her mind, she started to doze off sideways at the table, almost leaning out of her chair.

Reiner’s son on the other hand had a sulky look on his face as he watched his cartoon.

He knows his father wasn’t angry at him (and still very much loved him) but he hated that he had to get told off.

It wasn’t his fault that his sister didn’t take heed of his oh so wise and oh so great advice at lunch. He’s been in that very position before so he knew that you should always save your dessert for after dinner, even if you wanted to eat it at lunch time.

Still, he was only reminding her of the consequences she made! It’s unfair that even though she had her two mooses, she still got to have cotton candy grapes.

But deep down, Reiner’s son knew that his father wouldn’t deny him the cotton candy grapes either.

He knew that his father was gracious, even if he did just tell him off.

“Dad?”

Reiner looked up at his son who meekly watched him place the small portion of cotton candy grapes in front of his sister.

“Yeah?” He replied.

The boy glanced towards his tablet before looking over at his father again, his voice small.

“Can I have some grapes too?”

There was a stutter in his movement, but once Reiner stood up, he gave the boy a warm smile. He nodded twice.

“Of course you can, buddy. Of course you can.”

#reiner headcanons #reiner aot #reiner braun #reiner x reader #reiner imagines #reiner scenarios #attack on titan

[agathasangel]

make me forget (agatha harkness x fem!witch!reader)

I’m back and… in another fandom, I guess. Assuming you guys don’t hate this there’s probably gonna be a lot of soft!dark!agatha x witch!reader fics coming

warnings: angst, soft!dark!agatha, mommy kink, no smut though, possibly unhealthy and definitely unbalanced relationship, mind control, lots of pet names because it’s agatha, agatha planned on using reader to drain her power but has fallen too in love with reader.

summary: agatha is your magical mentor, and your first and only love. she has also decided that it’s her job to protect you at all costs, and one of the many ways she does this is the special spell she casts on you to make you forget all your troubles. also i got a little help from @belle-et-laa-bete

You lie on the couch, trying to summon the remote. It shook a little bit, and then fell off the tv table. You couldn’t understand why your telekinesis has gotten so weak. It was your most natural skill as a witch, the one you even struggled to control.

Agatha saw what you were trying to do, and she picked the remote up off the ground and brought it to you.

“Thanks, Aggie.”

“What’s the matter, hon? You look like you’re about to cry.”

“It’s just- i don’t understand why i can’t even do something so simple. It used to be so strong-“

“Baby, this is perfectly natural . You’re learning to control your powers, that’s all. It’ll come back even stronger, now that you’re safe with me guiding you.”

You had no reason to question Agatha, she was the smartest and most powerful witch you knew. But you still worried she was just trying to placate you. And, worst of all, you worried that if you lost your powers, you would lose her. The very thought made the tears in your eyes start to fall.

“No, angel, no. None of that.” Agatha says as she wipes away your tears. “You are a witch, babygirl, and you will always be.”

You hoped she was right. While your inability to control your powers while you were younger caused you to be an outcast, it was also what led you to Agatha. she became your mentor, your protector, and your first and only love.

“Aggie? Mama? You- you’ll stay with me no matter what, right? I- I need you. The world outside of here is scary, I don’t want to live without you.”

Agatha put a protective arm around you, feeling a pang of guilt. When her relationship with you began, she thought you were too strong for your own good. Her plan was to simply drain your power for her use (and, she told herself, for your protection). But now? She truly needed you, almost as much as you needed her. Agatha couldn’t imagine going back to living without you.

“Yes baby. This is your home, this is where you belong. We’re going to be together forever, mama promises. I’ve got you, I’ve got you. Shh…”

“I can’t believe I’m getting so upset over something so little but-“

“It’s okay, little one. Come here.”

She held you tight as you cried more, stroking your hair.

“Mama, the bad feeling won’t go away. Can you- can you do the special spell?”

The special spell was referring to a spell Agatha put on you whenever you were upset or scared, or when she felt you needed extra protection. It was a mind control spell that made you feel happy, safe and at peace. It also made you completely obedient to Agatha, which, the both of you had to admit, you loved.

“I think I can do that for you, babygirl.”

“Please mama, make me forget.”

“Of course, angel. You know how much mommy loves seeing you like that. The way your pretty eyes will glaze over but still look at me like I’m the most important thing in your world. The way you smile and giggle when i touch you, and especially the way you obey my every command so automatically without hesitation, even in your mind. Come over, kneel for mama and she’ll make you forget all your troubles.”

As you knelt in front of Agatha, she began chanting the spell in Latin. It was an incredibly complex spell, one you couldn’t even begin to understand, but to Agatha it was practically second nature. As she finished, you felt anything you may have been worried about melt away. A soft, fuzzy feeling washed over you and the only thing that mattered was your mommy. You looked up at the beautiful woman- the goddess, really- sitting above you as she cupped your cheek in her hand.

“Feeling better, honey?”

“So good mama.”

“I thought so. Just what you need, for me to take the reigns of your mind for a bit. Now darling, as pretty as you look on your knees, I want you to hop up on my lap.”

Immediately, you all but pounced on her, going limp in her arms.

“Good girl. Good.” She absentmindedly played with and kissed your hair for a bit, as you sat in mommy’s lap, feeling nothing but warmth and happiness. You tried remembering what you were so worried about earlier, and you couldn’t. You looked at your mommy. She was so beautiful, so much stronger and smarter than you. You felt so lucky to be hers.

“I’m so lucky to be yours, mommy.”

“I know. You’re mine. My girl, and you always will be. Nothing will ever take you away from me.” Agatha moved her hands to your shoulders and began rubbing them. It felt absolutely heavenly to be touched so gently by the woman you loved. Your brain was filled by the sensation of her hands on your back and shoulders. You felt her giving soft kisses to your temple, and you leaned into her further, smiling.

“Such a good girl for me. I love you. So happy lying in mommy’s arms. I’m glad our little spell could make you feel better.”

“You always know just what to do, mommy. You’re so smart and strong.”

Agatha flushed a bit at your praise, which she was certain she didn’t deserve. She knew how you felt about her, she knew you essentially worshipped the ground she walked on. But it still sometimes shocked her that someone as sweet and innocent as you loved and admired her so dearly.

“Let me kiss you, darling girl.”

You, of course, eagerly accepted her kiss. You stayed like this until you fell asleep, and Agatha reversed the spell, hoping you would wake up feeling better. Agatha’s own feelings of fear and guilt, however, had never fully subsided. She still worried that if you knew what her intentions with you were at the beginning of your relationship, or that she was the reason your powers had weakened, you would hate her.

“I’m sorry, angel. This is all my fault, and I swear I’ll make it right.”

#agatha harkness #agatha harkness x you #agatha harkness x reader #agatha harkness x female reader #fanfic #marvel #Agatha harkness angst #agatha harkness fic #agatha harkness fanfiction #agatha harkness imagine #my fics

[unhappy-day-in-hell]

The Dissection of Hazbin Hotel, Episode One: part 4

Onto the end part, Charlie meeting with the angels and... Vaggie's advertisement.

Let's finish this!

Part 1:

Part 2:

Part 3:

Part 4: //

--Uh. The fuck is this building and why is it in Hell? Are we not going to explain? (Trick question, there’s already so much exposition that it wraps right back around to leaving us in the dark!!)

--Ohhh. That's Adam’s voice? Someone as important as him does not sound like that.

...Stupid thought I just had: Adam has the first Adam's Apple in all of history too... because it's that little saying, that Adam got a piece of the forbidden fruit stuck in his throat to remind him of eating it. So Adam, really, should either sound like he's constantly choking on something/has a stuffed up scratchy throat, or he should have a super deep voice to indicate his adam's apple.

--Heck is wrong with your mouth girl?

--B Plot is them filming an advertisement. I know I tried to re-write this in the review earlier (and will offer an alternative near the end of the review), but this is the kind of smaller-time plot we need to do in these early episodes BEFORE we get to Charlie's stuff. It's not very good tonal whiplash to pair these two plots up.

Also Vaggie’s doing this on Charlie’s behalf. This is, once again, something Charlie should be doing.

--Why doesn’t Charlie know the leader of the Exterminators is Adam? Does that mean she doesn’t know anything important about her world in general? Or is Adam’s presence a secret to the world? Does Lucifer know Adam is here?

--Good god, Adam really IS just Mammon. He's even a performer who is like a rockstar. Viv has zero new ideas.

--We're cutting between Charlie’s "important" meeting with Adam and the filming for the advertisement. We really are. I guess this episode and Western Energy spring from the same source.

--“How were you this weekend” is at least a little amusing. If Adam was more airheaded like that and not *gestures* all this, I’d probably hate his presence less.

--There it is. The Vagina joke for Vaggie’s name. They… they really did that. They just couldn’t help themselves. Viv just can’t help herself.

Because really, what are you supposed to do with this name? People having to say “Vaggie” out loud or print it on merch is embarrassing. They could have called her anything. Maggie. Aggie. Naggie. Saggy. Haggy.

--Vaggie: We’ll fix it in post. Angel: Do you even know what that means?

Well you see Angel! Vaggie’s origin can be split!

For a long time, Vaggie was thought to be a sinner who died very recently, so of course she’d know about editing, because she had grown up in the era of that kind of tech.

Except now she’s been changed to be a fallen exterminator! This means there are a lot of implications. Are we going to use this moment to hint how ANCIENT Vaggie is as a former angel, by showing her as not knowing how to work technology? No, no of course not -- Vaggie seems competent with the camera, it’s just that her actors are dumb fucks.

This criticism spreads over to Adam, who talks just like a “normal guy” and he’s a modern rocker and all that shit. Adam, the first human, who is incomprehensibly ancient… doesn’t show any signs of being as ancient as he is. They couldn't even write him using outdated slang? Make him a disco lover or something and have him say "Groovy?" No? (He IS a thing made of light, he could shine like a disco ball!)

--Vaggie: I’LL FIGURE IT OUT.

Godddd Vaggie can’t have one single line with any life in it. How does she scream in anger with no anger.

--Hi Al. This shot reminds me of why I used to like you, because I DID like your design and your mannerisms once upon a time. I still feel an echo of the enjoyment I used to get from you, and it makes me sad how far you’ve fallen, to being Rosie’s lapdog. You do look good with this muted blue tinting your color scheme. I wish Hell was more of this color, it’s much softer on the eyes.

(Even when I was still a fan, I hated how overused red was. It was one of the first complaints I had. Then the show doubled down and removed even more of the colors from the color pallet to make it even redder.)

--Vaggie to Alastor: Why are you even here? Alastor: For the entertainment!

Actually you’re here because LilithRosie asked you to. She filed down your fangs. You are a toothless character.

--Alastor: I came here because I love seeing wasteful souls struggle to accomplish something meaningful and fail spectacularly!

This is almost exactly a line from the Pilot where Alastor said “I want to watch the scum of the world struggle to climb up the hill of betterment! Only to repeatedly trip, and tumble down to the fiery pit of failure." Except it just. Lacks. Any of the danger. Or the manic insanity boiling just under Alastor’s surface. The delivery is so deflated.

The words are stilted, like they were with Vaggie a while back.

--Much better qualified people than I have spoken about the use of vodou symbols around Alastor. All I can say is this: Practitioners of vodou have spoken about how harmful it is, and therefore, the symbols should not be in the show. It's that simple. It would have cost the team literally nothing to refrain from using them. In fact, we’re in Hell, and we’ve already used the Ars Goetia in Helluva Boss; why don’t they use the symbols of the Ars Goetia? Or other demonic Christian symbols? Or Lovecraftian symbols from the fictional Lovecraft universe? Or make up their own??? There were a million other options besides digging in your heels. It shows the crew and Viv’s inability to just learn or just be nice.

“This face was made for radio!” that shot, bleck, they made a discount of that scary shot from the pilot. Why is every line they reuse for Alastor worse than it was in the pilot? The pilot where Alastor said “I would have done so already” let Alastor be a little aggressive and threatening, but here, it's just him equating it to “this face can’t be captured on video” instead of him being allowed to flex his power and scare Vaggie and Charlie a little bit….

It makes me sad.

--AND AGAIN, THIS IS VAGGIE HAVING THIS IMPORTANT CONVERSATION WITH ALASTOR. Why is it Vaggie who is getting Alastor’s motivation speech and seeing his Scary Face and not CHARLIE!? The Hotel is CHARLIE’S! Charlie is the main character, she’s the one who has to face these moral battles! Alastor’s motivation and his scorn for her Hotel are CHARLIE’S obstacles to deal with; she has to be the one to face them, consider them, debate them, and find a way to overcome them. But Vaggie is the one here, again, in Charlie’s place. (And Vaggie doesn’t even seem to have any enjoyment or passion for the Hotel either, so SHE doesn’t offer anything in return when she’s facing these opposing ideas.)

--So Alastor is going to make a good advertisement for the Hazbin Hotel, in exchange for never having to work with television ever again.

God, it’s so… WHINY. This isn’t a powerful Overlord of Hell, who is able to manipulate the Hotel behind the scenes and everyone has to watch out for his power because they both need his power but also fear it. This is a dude bargaining over what chores he has to do. It’s depressing.

--And it ends with Alastor giving everyone new outfits. Like the pilot. Because of course. Viv has no new ideas in her head at all. Also Charlie's not here.

--I feel like this scene COULD have been a standout moment in another universe, where someone else wrote this story. The colors are very nice, and Alastor is genuinely one of the only sources of ANYTHING you might consider fun in this episode, even if he’s a pale shadow of what he used to be.

Imagine this as a rewrite for this Episode, and how it could have ended:

At the beginning of the episode, the Hotel staff is still figuring things out. They have a meeting and decide they want to make an advertisement to get people to come to the Hotel, but Al refused to take part, because he hates TV. Charlie then tries to film her own advertisement with Vaggie’s help, but fails to make anything good.

As she starts feeling discouraged in the blue room while cutting up tapes, Alastor walks in to taunt her for a little while. After a back and forth where Charlie asks what he even wants here, he gives his motivation speech, so Charlie can have her goal challenged. But eventually, Charlie asks him to use his power to help her with this, by getting the word out to the people of Hell; and Al agrees, because an empty Hotel is no fun… in exchange for something Al wants: he’ll be allowed to observe any part of the Hotel and give commentary over it whenever he feels like it, and he’s allowed to say anything he wants, positive or negative. Charlie reluctantly agrees to these terms.

Then Alastor uses his power and creates a huge radio tower out of the back of the Hotel. The rest of the Crew feel the Hotel shaking and run outside, and watch in confusion as the tower reaches up into the sky. Al then floats up to the top room, where an old radio station is set up inside. Taking his seat in the booth, Alastor uses his power to broadcasts a spectacular old-timey radio show all across the radio waves of Hell, which are impossible for people to turn off, so it reaches millions of them.

(This also marks his grand return to Hell after his time away…… I guess. Since they're going with that.)

Boom, now Alastor has a radio tower that he hangs out in for the rest of the series, and he’s often giving SCATHING commentary about what goes on inside the Hotel in its quest for redemption. It’s usually making fun of everyone, or damning criticism -- but every so often he compliments something or someone, or gives a bravo for a job well done if a character does manage to accomplish something (but it's always with this HINT that he doesn’t expect their victory to last.)

There.

I provided a better hook for Episode One to end on, something fun to look at -- AND it has Alastor being in total control, while still helping the Hotel, but clearly primed to fuck with it. It also gives the show its first stakes -- small ones, but a status quo is established and we know Charlie will be butting heads with Alastor for the foreseeable future.

--Back with Adam and Charlie, it has become an argument that sinners have earned eternal damnation by making mistakes, and angels and the souls in heaven are not the same; and that angels have never made mistakes. Adam even says he’s never made a mistake.

Why doesn’t Charlie bring up the fact that Adam ate the fruit of knowledge that damned humanity, literally the first sin ever committed alongside Eve? Would that require too much thought, because Adam could just say “hey Eve was the one who did that, then she forced me!” and Charlie would have no rebuttal, because this show doesn’t seem to care about logical or moral battles. (Honestly, I can bet Viv would genuinely believe that for Adam.)

Why don’t they also bring up the fact that all human souls are descended from Adam too? It would force Adam to say: “yeah I don’t care, they may be my grandkids but they made their choice and as the original father it’s my job to whoop their asses when they get out of line,” which would show off how horrible he is. (Or, just not have Adam act this way. The next point elaborates on that:)

--I keep asking myself WHY Heaven and the angels have to be depicted this way. Not "why they’re corrupt" -- but why they’re *gestures vaguely* like this, and so cartoonishly.

Some shows take themselves too seriously and need to lighten up, but a show like Hazbin Hotel has the opposite problem, where it won’t be serious when it needs to be serious.

Adam acts exactly like a demon. There is no distinction between demons and angels. They’re as foul-mouthed, raunchy, and gross. Why?

Is it supposed to be “commentary” or “satire” about real world issues, where authority/radical Christians think they’re better than everyone else just by virtue of being Christian? That’s my first guess.

But just like with Helluva Boss’s commentary on cartoonishly evil abusers: it’s not saying anything we don’t already know, and it hits you with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer to the face.

When Hazbin uses Adam to say “See? Heaven is hypocritical! It does the exact same bad shit as Hell, but gives ITSELF a pass!” it makes Hazbin Hotel worse for it, because of how one-note it makes literally everything in the universe, and how it sacrifices any actual clever worldbuilding, storycrafting, or realism for the sake of shock value. 

Hazbin Hotel is supposed to have a serious storyline meant for adults. It was meant to explore a serious moral question, and the angels are supposed to be one of the serious threats that Charlie has to change the mind of. You want us to take your show SERIOUSLY? Then you need to make villains we can TAKE seriously.

Think of it like this. If Heaven was allowed to have a different personality from Hell (if angels were allowed to act differently than demons), you’d be so much better for it.

First of all, it would give the show variety. Hell already has all the sex jokes, curses, and gore you could ever ask for – that’s Hell’s atmosphere. So let Heaven have a different atmosphere -- let its people has "serious" personality traits. Let them take themselves TOO seriously. That way, there’s some variety when characters go from one place to the next.

Second of all, it would give you way more personality types to play around with! (How boring must it get, writing the same screaming, cursing, sex-spewing archetypes over and over?) AND it would let different temperaments clash! Imagine Angel Dust meeting an Exterminator; Angel Dust makes everything a joke, and the Exterminator takes everything way too seriously, aaaaaand their personalities slam into each other. Imagine the possibilities.

But we can’t have that.

We can’t have anything because Viv can’t let herself be sincere or think this far ahead.

Instead we’re just stuck with Adam, who is Mammon.

--Lute says Charlie was “pardoned by daddy”? Who?? Lucifer? If Lucifer has the ability to blacklist souls from being killed, why can’t he just tell the exterminators to fuck off? Or are they referring to “God” as daddy, for which, I thought they weren’t going to touch God in this show?

The dialogue for this show is confusing. There was clearly no editing or rewriting to make anything make sense.

In the old pilot continuity, only an angel of higher rank had the ability to kill Lucifer, which means the exterminators were unable to kill him. Charlie, as his daughter, was directly below him in power, meaning Charlie would also be immune to them because she's stronger than them. But here apparently she's weak enough that the exterminators not only COULD kill her if given the chance, they WANT to kill her but have to hold back by some... law.

--Another song. Okay.

My opinion is that Brightman is a good singer, and this song definitely has more going on than the first one did. So… not terrible… but there’s also something missing in these lyrics. The way the music flows isn’t interesting and it goes by so fast. And Adam’s voice isn’t grating or terrible to listen to, but his dumb rockstar voice just kind of clashes into Brightman’s singing voice every so often, and makes it sound weird to me.

I could do without.

--OOH LAWD SHE ABOUT TO GO OFF. (That meme will never stop being funny. The shot is so tame. She doesn't even get to do any flexing or anything?)

--They’ll be back in six months?? Oh right, ahem, ahem: We’re putting this into EPISODE ONE? (I’m getting tired of saying that.)

Side note: they better not blame Charlie for this one, or try to make it out like she did something to cause this. Because... She literally didn’t. She didn’t get a word in edge-wise. (If they blame Charlie for making Hell worse, not only is it another Potential Dramatic Plot Moment they waste here, where Charlie would legitimately do a fuckup and have to face the consequences of her actions and it’s Oooh Drama -- it’s also totally unearned here, because Charlie Didn’t Do Anything. Literally if this is supposed to be “Charlie’s Mistake”, she didn’t do anything to MAKE A MISTAKE. )

--Alastor: I pulled a few LIMBS too, Hah hah hah!

Now you sound dead Alastor. I miss your fast-paced deranged laughter.

--To hear Blitzo’s voice coming out of Katie. Not even for a joke. I just. Vomit.

--(Quick question, is it just me or does it feel WEIRD to see Hell freaking out about the exterminations happening sooner, the way it is now? I mean, it’s a bad thing of course – but at the same time, it’s 6 WHOLE months away. That’s still a very long time; it’s not like the angels said they’d be coming in 1 WEEK or anything.

And again, moving the Extermination up to the mid-point of the year COULD have been a good plot punch a few episodes in – if the show had established itself as having a one year time limit before the next extermination, for instance, and for the first season we watch the weeks or months go by. The cast think they’re safe because they always have more time; “the year isn’t even half over yet.” But THEN, Charlie fucks up a few months in, and suddenly the date of the extermination is moved up!! WE ONLY HAVE A MONTH LEFT!! SHOCK AND HORROR. THERE IS MUCH LESS TIME NOW. HOW CAN WE DO THIS IN TIME!? PANIC! STAKES! DRAMA.

Makes my poor writer heart sad.

Imagine if we lingered on the Exterminations for a while before all this, and we learn that every single year, it takes about 3 months worth of planning in order for Sinners to secure hiding spots away from the Angels (a play on the three big holidays, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas). This is CRITICAL for Sinner survival; those who can't or don't are the ones who die, and spots are so competitive that it takes all that time for anyone to secure themselves. So when Charlie fucks up midway through the year and causes the Extermination to be moved up to just 1 month away, NO ONE IS SAFE, and there isn't enough time for three months of prep, which is why everyone flips their ever-loving shit: they know they're going to die and now there's a hysterical scramble all throughout Hell trying to secure safe spots.

--The ending shot shows an exterminator dead, and the angels out for blood about it.

Again, ahem-hem: EPISODE ONE.

And now, the Exterminators don’t even feel threatening -- because we know they can be killed.

What made the angels scary, originally, is that they were virtually untouchable. Demons could not defeat them, and angels could kill any demon they wanted to by default. (Even Alastor seemed to be weaker than the angels.)

The angels should have been a looming, impossible-to-defeat threat (at least for a while). This would have given the story tension, because the audience would know the sinners stood no chance if they ran out of time or failed to convince the Angels – it was a battle of MORALITY. It was a challenge for sinners to prove to Heaven they were redeemable, because Heaven held all the power.

They de-clawed their villains in their introductory episode.

…

Do Adam and the Exterminators even HAVE the authority to enact a full genocide??? Wasn’t there a “council of Angel Elders” mentioned in the beginning? Aren’t the exterminators just assigned to this post, and meant to keep the population low??? Won’t they get in trouble for overstepping their bounds!? ARE WE GOING TO GET ANY EXPLANATION AS TO HOW THE HIERARCHY WORKS OR HOW HEAVEN WORKS FIRST!? BEFORE WE GET INTO THIS!?!?

AAAAAAAAAAAAND ~CURTAINS!~

………………………………………………………………………

And that was the end of Hazbin Hotel Episode One.

…

So! What have we learned here today?

My personal takeaway is that, even though it’s cathartic to see this all start to go down in flames, I still feel disappointed and frustrated because of how much time I invested in it, even defended it to other people for a time. I'm frustrated because none of it had to be this bad. Viv didn't have to be evil. There was promise and potential, once upon a time.

Quite frankly, we were lied to. The premise that everyone fell in love with was dumped in the trash. For over four years, we were told this would be a story about redeeming sinners -- that’s what fans put so much of their time and money into. But that premise was discarded immediately, in favor of a generic War Against Heaven. Viv LIED to us, knowing from the start that the redemption storyline was never going to go anywhere.  

I just wonder how many resources were wasted creating this, how many people Viv hurt, how many opportunities were handed to Viv that could have gone to anyone else more deserving of it.

There wasn’t a single worthwhile thing in this episode. A handful of individual shots here and there were passable, but nothing enough to sit through it. Abysmal animation, pacing, storytelling, dialogue, voices, songs; characters that were flat and unmemorable, or stripped of what made them unique.

Charlie wasn’t the main character in her own show -- Vaggie was the one dealing with the morality of the other characters. (And frankly, Charlie didn’t NEED to meet with Adam. It accomplished nothing. If the angels had already decided to do the extermination in 6 months; they could have just done it, they didn’t necessarily NEED to meet with Charlie to enact it.)

Somehow, Hazbin found a way to do everything wrong!

This show should be taken as a lesson on what not to as an artist. (Any kind of artist, really.) 

In my opinion, the greatest weakness of this show is its inability to write anything sincere.

(And there’s a difference between something having sincere emotion, and melodrama, which Viv dumps in boatloads in her writing.)

I won’t re-write it all, but I basically mean what happened with Adam and the angels, where they aren’t allowed to be any different from the demons. They aren’t allowed to be serious, wise, ancient; because Viv CAN’T write them as sincere. (But this also includes so many other aspects of this show and this world as a whole.)  

(And its genre doesn’t shield it. Hazbin Hotel is trying to tell a STORY, so it doesn’t get to hide behind the genre of being an “episodic adult comedy”. It HAS to follow the rules of storytelling, and when it doesn’t, it is failing.)

And Hazbin Hotel is just one giant failure.

With that, I’ll wrap this up. I think I’ve said all I want to.

I don’t know if I’ll review any other episodes like this (or, if they’ll be this long), because they get worse and worse; and Episode 4 is such a serious, disgusting episode that I don't know if it's even worth it -- but I REALLY wanted to get my thoughts down for this one.

If you read it all, thanks for sticking around! It was fun to rip it apart.

If you have any thoughts you want to add onto this, I’d love to hear!

#Hazbin Hotel Critical #Vivziepop Critical #The Dissection of Hazbin Hotel #Episode 1

[mouseinthegreenhouse]

Writeblr Intro!- Take Two

Finally got around to redoing my writeblr intro with more details and stuff and both me as a writer and my WIPs so lets GO

All About Mousie (Me!)

hi, i'm mousie or mouse, whatever you prefer! i am very new to all of this and have just this year gotten back into writing my OG wips. the power of supportive friends haha! i'm excited to show off my little people who i have made and put through the wringer. i hope you like them as much as i do and i am looking forward to meeting other writers and learning all about their little guys!

Stuff I write and am fond of: A lot of fantasy and found family. There is romance sprinkled in there too but it isn't usually the main focus. My writing can have some darker themes and I try my best to balance it out with suited humour and some good times for the poor characters as well.

I like to write about morally grey characters and queer themes and my work is primarily YA fiction. Vampires tend to work there way into any of my fantasy works and I love writing about high stakes.

Last of all, I adore worldbuilding and can, and will, ramble on and on about little stuff that probably won't even end up mentioned. It's FUN and that's all I care about <33

---

My (current) WIPs

Project UMBR-1: A YA fantasy novel set in the world of Asteria, a place split into four nations and four seasons. It centres around Aggie, a fourteen year old pureblood human who has been uprooted from her normal life in order to save the world from a virus-like curse that is infecting anyone with magic in their blood. Summary-

In a world of people with the blood of magical creatures running through their veins, fourteen year old Agnes Bells is devastatingly human. It is only when the planet of Asteria is consumed by a fatal Sickness that she realises this may not be the curse she once thought it was. Sent off by the seemingly omnipotent Order with only a reluctant vampiric guide, a destination, and a will to save her loved ones' lives, Aggie finds herself on a journey that peels back the layers of an unfamiliar past. She never expects to end up uncovering a plot that stretches much deeper than what the Order has let on. What truly makes a hero? Aggie wonders if she will ever find out.

Project Henneton (Just Otto): A YA story set in early 1800s England, centred around a boy raised in a circus who is discovered to be the kidnapped child of a viscount. It focuses on family bonds and strife, as well as a mystery and battle between trust and loyalty. Summary-

Otto has never known his birth family. Walking the tightropes with the roar of applause below and the bright support of his troupe, his real family, has made him never really want to. He has found all he needs and the faces of the parents who were never there simply don't fit into that. However, when a visiting nobleman claims that Otto is the renowned and missing Henneton baby, his content life on the road comes to an abrupt stop. Forced into the arms of a family he never wanted, Otto is determined to make his way back to where he belongs. Only, it seems that the Hennetons are not going to let go so easily and secrets written in blood leave the deepest stains.

Project Creator: This dark fantasy story focuses around the all-consuming need for truth and the desperate clinging to a family long gone. It centres around the four rulers of the four seasonal fae courts as they grapple with the return of a father who abandoned them and the sudden appearance of an unknown fae who shares his same golden eyes. Summary-

The Fae Rulers have moved on from the disappearance of their father, The Creator. Or, that's what they tell themselves. They host balls and parties of grand splendour and ignore the cracks in their courts, and the way they barely speak to each other without a barbed comment and political intention. It's easier that way. It's their normal, just the same as it has been for the past few millennia. It's a normal that is torn apart by the sudden reappearance of The Creator, armed with a distant smile and a will to pretend that nothing has changed at all. Emotions are tumultuous and unlikely alliances are formed as the four siblings fight between embracing this dream come true and digging for the truth behind their family's collapse. Perhaps the arrival of a mysterious fae with familiar golden eyes will give them the chance to have both their picture perfect family and the truth they seek. Or maybe they will find themselves with neither once more.

Project Vampire: A dark YA romance featuring vampires, a marriage business proposal, and found family. Written in second person, it centres around you, the sudden guardian of your two younger siblings, on a quest to save both them and yourself from the greedy hands of people you once thought were friends. It focuses on learning to trust and a slow enemies to lovers that starts with marriage and ends with family.

Summary-

Following the death of your parents, you are left to care for your younger siblings. A feat that becomes much more dangerous as certain truths come to light and lead to the friendly faces of your hometown turning warped with greed and malintent. Left with no choice but to flee the only place you have ever known, you know you will not last long with treachery following your footsteps. To save both yourself and what remains of your family, you come up with a plan to enlist the help of the one thing the world fears more than anything. Vampires. Reluctant and with terror fuelling your every move, you leave your siblings in temporary shelter and knock on the door of the manor belonging to the notorious and vampiric Sir Maximilian Rodfell, armed only with your will and a proposal. What can go wrong?

---

I look forward to meeting new friends and learning about others' cool wips!! :D

#writblr #writeblr intro #writeblr introduction #writers of tumblr #writeblr community

[aristre]

aristre 🥹🥹pls tell me which UCs gojo, geto, shoko, nanami, megumi, nobara, and yuuji would get accepted into and attend + bonus points if you classify them as college stereotypes

yes baby anything. ANYTHING. for you. guys you can request too don't let aaesuki carry my blog by herself please

jjk characters & universities of california

satoru gojo

ucla

accepted by all the ucs except uc merced btw ty aaesuki for the idea. bro is so mad he drives down to uc merced in his fanciest prettiest clothes to strut around and geto is in the passenger seat like lol (are you serious).

but no ofc he's ucla. dude's on frat row getting wasted and banging every single hot person on gayley. he shows up to lecture once in a while not to listen but to look pretty while everyone stares and whispers abt him. ruins every single stem curve. god i hate him

i think his favorite dining hall would be epicuria because he has fine taste :)

suguru geto

ucla

dude i think he'd go to uc irvine but aaesuki was like no he and gojo go together so whatever. he actually shows up to lecture 40% of the time and has good notes. he sells them for $20 and makes a tidy profit unlike gojo who buys an ipad and proceeds to play temple run on it instead of writing notes.

he goes to peet's coffee after lecture and orders a caramel latte or sthing fruity except when he looks for his meal ticket he realizes he forgot to redeem one. everyone in line gives him theirs

ieri shoko

uc san diego

she is a woman in stem and she hates socializing (i think) so nowhere is better than uc socially distant. if she's not in her single dorm she's in that big ass building on campus where it gets progressively more quiet as you go up and she's in the most quiet floor. i don't go to ucsd

i think she would be in a lab freshman year, doing clinical research sophomore year, and publishing papers junior year. goes to grad school at stanford or something ..

kento nanami

uc berkeley

im so sorry im so sorry i have to put u here nanami. i was gonna say he goes to croads for fun but i can't even say that cuz he would never do that. bro is the guy who tells people in the libraries to be quiet since some people need to study. bro also shows up to every single lecture in the front row and asks insightful questions the profs love him

he rooms w haibara his second year after they get kicked out of the dorms cuz ucb hates providing housing :3

megumi fushiguro

uc berkeley

im so sorry goomi that u would go to uc berkeley. i mean what. go bears! brain like berkeley! anyways dude's on that 4.0 gpa 25 creds a semester 4 extracurriculars shows up to office hours kinda guy. he DOES go to croads but only bc it's close by and he doesn't want to spend money on doordash but he rlly should. he should get doordash

accidentally gets drunk at a party he was dragged too and drunk texts the yuuji + nobara gc but because he's so hammered it comes out like "mile read my" and when they're like what he sends the blurriest selfie except he's not even in it it's his hair and half a finger.

nobara kugisaki

uc santa barbara

yassss prison dorms prison school. never attends lectures, but gets decent grades anyways. often out partying and shopping but also a fan of studying in the library after putting on makeup and picking out a fit good enough to gag the students from abroad. gets dole whip from that one dining hall. yea

hates the lagoon cuz it stinks bad but still goes there anyways when she needs some time to relax

yuuji itadori

uc davis

go!! aggies!!!! let's be real he accepted cuz he heard there were cows and there are cows. he loves the cows. dude i think he would be a target and costco fan he likes to go in there and walk around and stare at everything. except he has to drive to sac to get to target since they don't have one at davis LMFAOOOO ..... go aggies!

got food poisoning from the dc chicken but he still went back for seconds. got food poisoning again. friends had to hold him back but he went for thirds anyways. bonus points to anyone who guesses what happened after

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #satoru gojo #geto suguru #suguru geto #ieri shoko #shoko ieri #nanami kento #kento nanami #megumi fushiguro #fushiguro megumi #nobara kugisaki #kugisaki nobara #yuuji itadori #itadori yuuji #headcanon #writing

[kaynai-sama]

AU spoiler

“Do you think I want this?! Of course not!” Agatha yelled at everyone. “I don’t want to be as mediocre as our parents were when it came to this guys!”

“You volunteered to be a villain, Aggie, now you listen.” Olga scolded. “Besides, you heard our parents. The wild kratts are dangerous to mess with. We can’t take more risks than necessary.

“No!” Agatha looked away, she put her hand on the left side of her face, covered with bandages. “I didn’t make that fucking deal for anything. We’ll kill them.”

“I kinda agree with Agatha on this one.” Johny muttered.

“What? No! We have to defeat them, not kill them, that’s not right!” Olga stood up from her chair. “I know you just want to prove yourself to your dad, but it’s not worth it. Whatever you did to yourself was not worth it as well.”

“You don’t know my father... this has been his mission, to end the wild kratts. I’ll do it wheather you like it or not, Olga.”

“Aggie, calm down.” Duncan stood up and grabbed his sister by her shoulders. “Dad’s an asshole, you gotta acknowdlege that.”

“Don’t you ever say that about our father! Just because you’re not like them doesn’t mean I am like you!”

“You almost die that one time!”

“So?! You know what he says, there’s no such thing as trial and error. Everything needs to be accurate the first time! That’s why I tested it as soon as I finished, and it worked!”

“No trial and error? When did he ever said that?”

“Ugh, OF COURSE HE NEVER TOLD YOU THAT! YOU GODDAMN GOLDEN CHILD!”

She stormed off to her plane. Wondering again about her feelings. Once again, did she actually hated the wild kratts or is this just courage? Does she actually wants her dad’s aproval? Or course, the answer is simple. She promised to kill the wild kratts, no matter what. Come on, his aproval is not necessary but Duncan gets it all, why can’t she? She desserves a little bit of his paternal love... If he even had some.reserved for her...

“Man, you need to control your sis.” Johny said.

“It’s not her fault. You guys don’t know what she’s been through.” Duncan replied. “Fuck you, dad.” He whispered to the ceiling.

“Was your childhood that bad?” Olga asked.

Duncan was about to say something else. But he didn’t want to reveal more about his past. “I’m leaving now, with my sister. I’ll talk to her, but I warn you, she won’t change her mind.”

Olga sighed and walked out. “Guess I’ll leave too. This was a... nice meeting.”

“I would say it was rather... chaotic.”

“Shut it, Johny.”

“Whatever.” Johny stood up and started his van. “If you excuse me, I have a stake to cook... and it’s not human, for the record.”

“That’s good.” Duncan sighed. “See you all later.”

“Bye, Duncan!” Olga said and left.

He just left to the plane. He saw Agatha sitting on the pilot cabin chair, again with her thinking face. That’s new, when did it all started? Or right... Kayla.

#wild kratts #wild kratts au #wk next gen au

[nicoliharu]

""Asking otp questions until people start to get annoyed"" Aggie's Version day №1:

Are they jealous/possessive of each other?

Hi babe flower!!! 💗

EXCUSE ME

💗 I REALLY LOVE THIS?? YES 💗

⚠️Wait! That below will be jealous/possessive content, if you feel uncomfortable, don't read ⚠️

Context of the illustration: At first glance, it looks like she's annoyed with him, but that's not the point. Both expressions are how they ''react'' to a certain situation

Jealous Ruggie:

To be honest I needed help thinking about Ruggie and thanks to my friends I managed to get somewhere.

Ruggie's jealous before and during his relationship with Agatha, it's not something so problematic that it affects his girl but himself.

Think with me, he has commented several times in history things like ''someone like me'' or ''a hyena like me''. In my point of view, this is a sign of low self-esteem, and what's worse, in all these situations he talks about it laughing.

So in my view, he might not feel good enough for her, but he also knows how to stand up.

He may seem like a guy who isn't intimidating, but believe me, he's going to use his unique magic under Agatha's nose to humiliate certain uncomfortable persons.

Seriously, he's gonna do it, I advise we don't play the expert with him, Ruggie will always have the upper hand, remember that, dude.

Ruggie's also possessive, so through small gestures with her whether he knows it or not, he leaves his scent in it.

He knows humans don't have heightened senses, but beastmens and faes will sense it and that's enough.

Okay, it's irresistible for him to smell his own scent on her, and Agatha just accepted it and doesn't show any discomfort.

In private moments with a lot of affection from her he can tell and talk about how he feels, Ruggie trusts her.

She will gently comfort him whenever she can, cuddling, food, kissing and resting sessions are always on the list. he loves how she cares for him.

Jealous Agatha:

Unlike Ruggie, who doesn't show it directly and keeps it to himself, Agatha behaves in three ways: Expresses that he's not happy with the situation, withdraws, or swallows this annoying feeling.

She also has issues with low self-esteem and this creates the same feeling that he is ''not good enough'', no that's not healthy, but Agatha doesn't take anything out on Ruggie at all.

Possibly she can look the person in the eyes, not at all cheerful...oops a little intimidating if the person is crossing the line, if that person knows that Ruggie's committed and is acting that way on purpose, she'll take the initiative unless Ruggie fixes and dodge with some joke or something.

Does he like it when she's a little hum, ''angry''? XD

She makes bracelets and sweaters for Ruggie and leaves little kisses and marks where only he can see.

Branding doesn't mean it's just for outsiders to see, it's for the one you love, of course, if they like it and consents.

Ruggie loves it so, Agatha always does.

But none of these situations are also frequent and hurt each other.

Agatha talks openly to Ruggie about it and he comforts her too, with affection, kisses, food, gifts, wildflowers, and other things.

Conclusion:

Jealousy's not a frequent feeling between the two and doesn't harm them. They manage to resolve this with kind, conversation, and dedication to each other.

Sorry to write too much, it was fun for me and my English. I was very happy to receive your ask, thank you so much, babe 💗

#THANK U SO MUCH BABE #Sorry for a few things #I'm not a good writer or used to writing about anything #twst #twst oc #twst mc #twst ruggie #ruggie bucchi #agatha #aggie #twst fanart #my art #FRGKEURRFHKJERHFKERHHSDHFSDHFSJDHFKSDGSHBFDKGSDHYFKBGF #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #💗💗💗

[bodycountgame]

Ahead of voting opening on Sunday,  I just wanted to drop a quick FAQ to help answer some of your questions! 

Remind me why we have to vote?

When I started writing Body Count, I didn’t like the idea of deliberately writing filler characters that I didn’t really like and was perfectly happy to kill off. So I thought: ��Hey, the beauty of interactive fiction is that it’s interactive! Why not just write only characters that I adore and make my readers decide for me?”

I think it’s kind of a fun idea, and I hope that you guys do too :) 

What are we voting for?

The vote will be between the 9 cast members that you have met so far. You are voting for the character you most want to save; the RO that you most want to keep around and see more of. The top 6 characters in the poll are guaranteed to survive (at least until the next poll).

What are you going to do with the results?

From the results of the poll, the bottom 3 characters will be at risk. I’ll then make the final decision about who actually gets the chop - otherwise it’d be really obvious who is getting murdered from just looking at the poll, and that wouldn’t be very fun at all. Gotta keep some element of surprise, right?

Will all of the votes happen this way?

Not necessarily! I’m trying something new doing this, so I’ll see how it goes. I’m keen to have all of the murder decisions being made by readers, but who appears on the chopping block may vary.

How many times can I vote?

There’s some amount of strawpoll magic stopping you voting more than once, but feel free to get all your friends/family members etc to vote on your behalf. It seems to be more browser based than IP address-y (I don’t know anything about computers - is it obvious?).

When does voting end?

Voting begins on Sunday 30th May and ends at 11:59pm BST on Sunday 13th June (so you’ll have just over two weeks)

More frequently asked questions under the cut!

When will we find out who gets murdered?

When I release a completed Chapter 2! I’d love to be able to put a date on it, but I’m afraid I just don’t know! I’ll still be posting fortnightly updates, so you’ll get a bit of an idea of my progress.

Are the results of the poll going to be visible?

Yep! You’ll be able to keep an eye on how many votes each RO has throughout the voting window. If your fave falls behind and you want to beg your friends to vote on your behalf then power to ya.

The producers aren’t on this poll - that means they’re the murderers!

I’m afraid that you won’t be able to sus out who the murderer is or isn’t based on who appears on polls. The producers aren’t in this one because I think that it makes most sense to have the first murder victim be a cast member - they’ll definitely feature on future polls.

Wait, so the same ROs will die in every game regardless of our MC’s actions?

Yes - at least for the early chapters/deaths. I would love to set it up so each death could be either of two people, but there would be so much coding and work to go into pulling something like that off and I just can’t commit to it.  There are already a lot of variables in Body Count to make the experience as varied as possible for different MCs, so adding this amount of variation would just be really unachievable. 

Ok, but what if all the NB/F/M ROs die?

This isn’t gonna happen! I’m really proud of my diverse cast, and I’ll be making decisions about who is at risk in future polls based on who has already been killed. Basically, there won’t be a situation where only characters of a certain gender/ethnicity are dying, because that would be fucked up.

If my fave dies I’m gonna lose my shit and send you loads of really aggy anon messages.

Ah! How about instead of doing that... you don’t? I realise that some people are going to be disappointed whoever dies, but that’s just the thing - I really can’t please everyone. Even if I just decided for myself who was going to die, it wouldn’t be possible to please everyone. 

If the idea of your RO dying will send you into a frenzy such that you cannot resist sending anon hate, please consider just not playing the WIP and waiting for the final game. I think that this is a really fun idea, but I absolutely accept that it isn’t for everyone.

I hate these mechanics and this game isn’t for me.

Cool, yeah, I totally get that! This game absolutely isn’t for everyone - it’s something that I’m writing for my own amusement more than anything else. If this game isn’t for you, you absolutely don’t have to play it! You could wait for a completed game when you know who is going to die, or you can just peace out altogether. I won’t take it personally and you don’t need to explain to me why you don’t like it.

Will you also give a warning at any point in the full, released game that certain ROs won't make it or will you completely leave it up to surprise?

Yeah, I think so. I plan on including an option to leave it up to surprise or toggle to lock off the romance paths with the ROs that are going to die.

How many murders should we expect to see before the end of the process?

At the moment, I have 3 or 4 murders planned (depending on who they end up being and the direction that I take the plot) plus there isn’t a happy ending with the murderer/s if they are your RO. I’m expecting to lose 4-6 of the original 13 ROs before we finish up. 

#villa killa #technical stuff #The Vote #i have had SO MANY questions about this process #hopefully this answers most of them! #FAQ

[zafirosreverie]

Share my infinite (Agatha x Fem!reader) Part 2

A/N: This is long, guys. But i didn't want to do two parts for this, since i still have to do another one for the reader's recovery. Also, I have a huge headache, so forgive any mistakes.

Anyway, i hope you like it! ^ - ^

You ran as fast as you could, voices screaming with rage behind you. They will kill you. 

“Shit” you growled when you tripped with a branch. You got up quickly and continued running, but that second was enough for the dogs to come closer to you. Those stupid dogs and their stupid owners, why couldn’t they leave you alone?! You didn’t do anything to them and yet they were hunting you, just because of your “family”. 

“I don’t even have the last name” you mumbled. 

You were part of a rich family that was respected among the people of your town, but you were never a part of it. You were the odd one, the freak, the mistake. You were the only one that inherited your grandfather's...condition. 

At some point in the family’s story, someone thought it was cool and a good idea messing up with dark magic and ended up marrying a vampire, condemning the entire lineage to fear for the purity of their blood. By the time you were born, that was just a legend, something the parents told their childs to make them behave. 

“Y/N, stop doing that” your mother would say. “It must be the vampire in her” your father would add. 

You were a pretty curious girl, which led to many misbehaviours, so you heard that phrase too often. 

“Wish something really hard and it will become a reality” you thought with sarcasm. 

When you were 8, the nightmare began. You had just lost your baby teeth and your new ones were appearing. Your parents thought it was cute, but then, your new fangs came and they screamed in horror. They were too long to be normal. They were like your grandfather’s. They were vampire’s fangs.

At first, they tried to pull them out, it hurted like hell, but they didn’t move. So, your parent’s kept you hiden, not even the rest of the family could see you (you would later hear that they didn’t want to). The only person that you were allowed to interact with, was the grandfather himself. He was actually your great great great great great great grandfather, but allowed you to call him Grandpa or Grandfather. Your parents decided that you were no longer their daughter, so he gave you his last name. His real one.

He was sweet and nice with you, teaching you how to retract your fangs and everything he knew about your condition. He told you that you shouldn’t worry, that it was something that happened every generation. Your uncle Nicholás had it too, so it wasn’t anything you couldn’t control. 

What he didn’t tell you was that uncle Nick was burned alive for it.

You weren't a full vampire, you only had a few remnants of vampire blood in your veins. Grandpa was sure that, with every generation that had the condition, it became weaker and weaker, so he had faith that you would be the last one to have it. And he was right. 

You were the last one. None of your nephews or nieces got it, nor their children or grandchildren or great grand children. You were there for the babies’ births, and for their deaths too. Generations came and went, but you remained the same. You stopped aging at 22, and were trapped like that ever since. Your grandfather died long after your great grand nephews did, but it proved that you were not eternal.

As the years passed, you became kind of a myth among the family, the maiden who didn't age. The ghost of the library. The shadow of the house. Generation after generation, you became just another part of the family heritage, something that came with being part of the Van Dales. Everyone treated you like another decoration.

Until now.

These new people (you had stopped thinking of the new generations as your family long ago) decided it wasn’t fair that you got to enjoy all the money while they had to die. It was a stupid argument, but that didn’t matter. You knew they just wanted to get rid of you. And that’s what they did. 

They spread the word around the town, that whoever brought your head to them would be rewarded with part of the family treasure. You barely had time to grab a small bag with your belongings (the ones you had since you were a child) before you were carried out of the house and into the woods.

They didn't tell you why, just to wait and they left you there. A few minutes later you heard the footsteps of the people and a man saying that he would be the one to kill you and claim the reward.

You started running in that very second.

“don’t change, don’t change, don’t change” you begged, feeling your eyes burning. 

One of the things that you learnt the hard way was that when you were in danger, your e/c eyes would change to dark red, and then you would go into a frenzy. That meant you would become a murder machine, and you didn’t want that even if it was your last hope. 

“Of all the things I got from the vampires, why couldn't it be super speed?” you thought as you heard the men coming closer. Your legs were burning and your lungs were about to explode.  

You weren’t paying much attention, so you didn’t notice the air changing nor the energy around you. You needed to escape. 

You tripped again and you cursed. But you couldn't hear the dogs or the men anymore. You lost them? How? They were right behind you, there was no chance that you could have lost them.

But you needed to rest so you weren't complaining at all. It didn't last for too long. 

You heard a leaf crushing and steps close to you. You stood up quickly and prepared to run again, but something stopped you. You couldn't move, as if your feet were glued to the earth. 

"Well, well. What do we have here?" A voice said behind you. You froze and your eyes started to burn again. The person walked around you and you saw the most beautiful woman ever. Her eyes and hands were glowing with a purple light and suddenly you understood why you couldn’t move. She was a witch. 

Your grandfather taught you about witches, saying that, just like you, they were usually misunderstood, and that you shouldn’t be afraid of them. Even if you ever meet an evil witch, the vampire blood in you would protect you. The fact that her magic had an effect on you, meant that she actually didn’t want to hurt you. 

"Aren't you a precious little thing?” she asked and you couldn’t help but notice how lovely her voice was. “What are you doing here, darling?” 

You opened your mouth but closed it again. There was so much to explain but words didn’t come to you at the moment. You remained silent for a few moments before trying to speak again.

“I- I escaped” you whispered, making the woman raise her eyebrow.

“escaped? from what?” she asked, stepping closer to you.

“Men” you simply said. Her presence was making you nervous and you felt your cheeks blushing. 

Your answer seemed to be enough for her and she nodded, unwrapping you from her magic.You noticed her eyes turned to an ice blue color and you gasped. They were the most beautiful eyes you’ve ever seen.

“What’s your name?” she asked. 

“Y/N” 

“Y/N” she repeated and your heart jumped a little. You loved the way your name sounded in her voice. “Come with me” she said and started walking. You blinked and stood there for a moment before you quickly followed her. You didn’t know her, but it was this witch or the hunters. 

They didn’t have beautiful blue eyes or a lovely voice. So the choice was easy.

She took you to a small cabin, surrounded by big trees and a little pond on the side. You blinked and blushed as she opened the door for you. The simple interior made you feel warm and protected. She saw you wandering around the room, watching her things carefully, not touching anything but being interested in them.

You noticed her smile and stopped walking, taking a step back. She was staring at you as if you were her prey, which, to be fair, might be the case. 

“Didn’t anyone tell you that you don’t follow strangers into their houses, love?” she finally asked after a long moment of just staring at you. 

Agatha was intrigued by you. You shouldn't be here. You shouldn’t have been able to pass the barrier she put around her house, not even other witches could do it. But most importantly, you shouldn’t be standing there as if you were comfortable in her presence. As if you weren’t afraid of her.

“I’ve been living with strangers for a long time” you said honestly and shrugged “i guess i’m not afraid of them anymore”

That made Agatha even more curious. She walked to you and locked eyes with you. You were a little surprised by it, but you didn’t look away. 

“You’re like me” she said softly, and you shrugged again.

“I guess so?”

The witch didn’t want to have high hopes, but she had been alone for almost 200 years now and the possibility of having some company was enough to let you stay some days. At least until she discovered more about you and how much power you had.

_________

“Don't” Agatha warned you, not lifting her eyes from her book “whatever you’re thinking, don’t”

You giggled and ignored her “I’m not doing anything, Aggie” you lied and she sighed. 

She was about to turn around to see what you were planning, when she felt your cold hands in the back of her neck, making her jump.

“Y/N!!!” she yelled and you laughed, watching her shivering. 

“Got ya!” you said when she turned to face you

“Those are ice! Are you sure you’re not dead?” she asked with sarcasm and fake anger, but the blush on her cheeks gave her away. 

“Could be. I haven’t checked my pulse today” you joked and she chuckled. 

You had been living with her for a year, and she had fallen head over heels for you. You were sweet, charming, always had a smile on your beautiful face and you were always finding ways to make her laugh. You were kind and loving towards her, making her loneliness fade away. 

But you were also naughty as hell. 

You loved making pranks, jokes and chaos. She was your favorite target, but it was something almost innocent, nothing that a child couldn’t do (a part of her knew it was because you were forced to grow up too quickly, so you were just doing what you wanted to do back then), but that benevolence didn’t extend to other people.

Your pranks and jokes were anything but innocent when the targets were people from the town near the forest. It made sense, because they were the same people that tried to kill you a year ago. But you once told her that you actually just enjoyed causing chaos, which made her fall in love with you even more. She loved being by your side whenever you caused something among the humans. It was a magnificent artwork, a chaotic, kind of evil, maniac, artwork. And it had both of your signaments in the corner.

She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t notice you talking to her. When you looked at her and saw that you had lost her at some point, an evil grin appeared on your face. Well, you were not a person that decline opportunities. 

Agatha gasped when you pushed her to the pond. 

“Y/N!!!!” she yelled again and you laughed harder. 

“That’ll teach you not to ignore me when I’m trying to declare my love for you, Harkness” you joked and walked to the house. 

The witch sighed as she stood and used her magic to dry herself. That has been your most cruel joke to this day. 

When she met you, she assumed you were a witch. You crossed her barrier, after all, so you must be a powerful one. But when she tried to steal your magic when you were asleep, she sensed it was too weak, she could barely call it magic at all. 

That confused her so much. How did you cross then? This amount of magic was not enough to do it. The next day, she confronted about it and you just blinked. 

“You think i’m a witch?” you asked before you giggled “I’m a vampire” you said and left her speechless. 

You taught her everything you knew about your condition, but it wasn’t too much since your family just wanted you to hide yourself. So she tried to learn everything she could about vampires. You frowned and said that if she was going to learn about your kin, then you wanted to learn about hers.

And just like that, your lessons started. The first days, you two sat at the table with a pile of books in front of you, but that plan disappeared the moment you saw her stretching to make her back more comfortable. You took the books and threw them on the floor, making Agatha gasp, then you took her hand and made her lie beside you on the wood. You’ve never used chairs for study or reading since then.

The joke started when she started to teach you some tricks. They were pretty simple and basic, but she loved the look in your face when you got one of them right. One day, you were so happy to finally do a spell you were trying for weeks, that you kissed her cheek with excitement and her mind went blank, her cheeks burning. You noticed it and never let her live with it.

Since then, you would make comments or do things that made her believe you might feel the same, but then you would just laugh and leave her with a hole in her chest. 

“Aggie?” you asked softly. You had noticed that she didn’t follow you and after a moment, you went out again to make sure she was okay. You frowned when you saw her just standing there, lost in her thoughts.  

You carefully took her hand and she jumped, looking at you. 

“Are you ok?” you asked and she nodded, removing her hand from yours. 

“I’m fine, Y/N” she said and your frown deepened. She never used that tone with you. The “I have something in my mind but you wouldn’t understand so let’s pretend i’m alright” tone. You took her face in your hands and made her lock eyes with you. 

“Don’t lie to me” you whispered 

Agatha stared at you for a moment before she sighed. She couldn’t. She always thought she was strong enough to lie to everyone, to take what she needed and do what she wanted. But you, you made her weak. And she would do anything for you. Even expose her heart and let you break it.

“Please don’t do it” she said “please don’t make jokes about your love for me. Not when we both know you don’t mean it.”

You frowned again in confusion, but when you understood her words, you blushed and felt your pulse racing. 

“Who said i don’t mean it?” you asked softly, caressing her cheek.

“NO!” Agatha said, more harsh than she intended “Don’t do it Y/N.” she said, whispering again “Please. Don’t give me false hopes. I can’t take it” she begged and you felt guilt invading you.

You had been making those jokes because they were the only way you could get your own feelings out of your chest without actually risking your friendship with the witch. If you had known she felt the same way…

Agatha gasped when she felt your lips against hers. She wasn’t expecting this, but she had been wanting to do it for so long that she took the opportunity. She wrapped her arms around your waist and pulled you closer to her. Your lips were too soft and she would be happy to lose herself in them.

“I’m sorry” you whispered when you broke the kiss “I’m sorry i didn’t tell you before” 

That made her open her eyes. There was a silent question in them, and only your own eyes had the answer. 

You kissed her again, and again, and again, wanting to erase all the doubts you accidentally planted in her mind. Each kiss was an apology and a promise. No words were needed at that moment.

#x reader #reader insert #imagine #agatha harkness #agatha harkness imagine #agatha harkness x reader #agnes imagine #agnes x reader #marvel #mcu #wandavision imagine #agatha harkness x y/n #agatha harkness x you

[theeternalblue]

“Babe!” A sweet and giddy voice babbles.

Jughead rolls his eyes at the excitement of his 18-month-old daughter - yes, he was one of the guys who always complained about kids’ age in months but in his new role as a dad, he gets it. There’s a difference between months because babies grow incredibly fast and one day you’re trying to make them stop crying and the next they are crawling and munching on the plug of his laptop’s charger.

But this time, Agatha is not exactly looking at herself in the mirror or having a friend over for that essential (and horrific) experience of playtime - he cannot say it enough but he only stands his child and he will not witness the stupidity of another kid shoving legos up their noses.

Aggie has just spotted Jughead’s childhood best friend, Archie. Of course, he’s accompanied by his wife, Veronica, who looks thrilled to hear the child's voice.

“‘onnie!” Aggie adds with a big smile as Veronica joins her on the floor.

“Hello, darling,” Veronica coos and starts tickling Aggie’s sides making her squirm and laugh.

Meanwhile, Archie is already blushing.

“Jug-“ he attempts as apologetically as possible. Everyone knows this is not his fault. Aggie keeps mimicking Veronica and after one weekend with her godparents, she decided that calling Archie babe was the best thing in the world.

“Babe! Up-up!” Aggie demands, lifting her arms so Archie picks her up.

Jughead snorts a laugh when Archie shakes his head.

“Babe,” Veronica pouts, copying the baby, and Archie rolls his eyes. “Pick her up. You are her favorite.”

“Everyone needs to stop calling me that.” Archie gets on the floor and repeats his name like when they were toddlers trying to spell their names.

“But babe!” Jughead teases and Veronica chuckles. This earns him a glare from everyone’s favorite redhead.

Aggie though decides to soothe Archie’s worries by placing her chubby hands on Archie’s face and shaking her head. “No mad, babe?”

“I can’t win, can I?” Archie’s rhetorical question is met with a bout of laughter from Aggie and those adorable kissing sounds she makes because her mom spends too much time trying to prove a Jones can be lovable and sweet.

Jughead sweeps his hair to the side while sipping his third coffee of the day, watching as Veronica sits next to Archie and they both play cool auntie and uncle, spoiling Aggie to no end.

“Get your own kid,” he has said jokingly before, and even if Archie gets the gleam in his eyes, the couple agreed to wait a bit more. Veronica has never said no, but she hasn’t said yes either. It's a running joke she's taking notes about what not to do after witnessing Aggie growing up.

But it's funny. While Archie's friendly deameanor might seem the obvious choice for a child, Veronica steals the spotlight with her expressive gestures and calm voice – she had the touch when Aggie was a colicky baby.

"We're getting a puppy," Archie says later when they are feeding Aggie – more like making a Jackson Pollock with apple sauce.

"You're not getting a puppy," Jughead replies, glaring at Veronica who chuckles. "You're not."

"We are," Veronica confirms. "It's a cute little fur ball. Sweet, friendly, a bit goofy."

"You have Archie," Jughead quips, while Aggie shakes her arms giggling.

"Ha-ha." Archie leans against Veronica, wrapping an arm around her shoulders in a gesture that makes Jughead think they are working on something more. He'll figure it out later.

"You're trying to make my child like you more than me."

"Maybe," Veronica jokes.

"She already does!" Archie exclaims. "Right, Aggie?"

"Babe!" Aggie shouts, delighted when Archie takes the spoon from Jughead's hands and gives it to her. She obviously takes all the food without effort now.

"May I hire you as a babysitter?" Jughead wonders. "I think it's one of the few jobs you haven't added to your list yet."

"You can't afford me, Jug. I'm a kept-man, devoted to my wife. The only job I haven't been fired from."

"Yet."

"Shut up."

Veronica laughs but decides their antics are too much. She takes Aggie to clean up and change, look cute for when mom gets home from work.

"A dog, huh?" Jughead asks as he washes his cup and Aggie's bowl.

Archie smiles. "Baby steps."

So there's a plan. There's always a plan.

#varchie fanfiction #varchie #varchie drabble #idk what this is but here it is #[mine]

[galactic-magick]

The Mysterious Woman: Agatha Harkness/Agnes x Reader

Request: thank you 😊It's an Agatha Harkness imagine where Wanda and Vision always see a woman with "Agnes" ,but she never gets close enough to interact with anyone,and Agatha always brushes it off when asked about it. The only ones who can get close on are Tommy and Billy.And they tell their parents that she's Agnes wife. the reason for that is that her powers are instable(she's also a witch) and Agnes is very protective. - @ateliefloresdaprimavera

Summary: You’re Agatha’s wife, but your magic is unstable so you try not to interact with Wanda to keep her from being suspicious, but her twin boys are curious about you.

Words: 600+

Warnings: slight angst

Author’s Notes: This was a very interesting idea, and I absolutely adore the twins so it was fun to write them talking to the reader :)

Taglist: @nyx-aira​ @midnight-lestrange​ @thestrangeundoing​ @dreamydanvers @sleep-deprived-athlete​ @dr-robotnik-said-hella​ @fallingfor-fics​ @p-nymph​ @thelanawinterrs​ @sunproud​

-

-

-

You know it’s for the best, but you can’t help but wish you could help Agatha more.

Your magic is incredibly unstable, and no matter how much you’ve been practicing you still struggle to control it. Agatha’s been happy to cover for you and keep you away from Wanda so she doesn’t get suspicious, but it’s getting a little boring to not participate in all the fun. Occasionally you’ll run into Billy and Tommy and they’ll wave to you, despite them having no idea who you are. Most people probably think you’re just “Agnes’s” friend, since she seems to be the only person you consistently hang around and talk to.

Agatha tells you that soon you’ll be able to reveal yourselves, and even though you’ll still have to be careful with your powers, at least you won’t have to hide anymore. That gives you hope, that the plan will be fulfilled, and someday soon “The Scarlet Witch” will be a danger no more.

You go for a walk in the afternoon while Agatha goes over to Wanda’s house, and you pass by the playground with only Billy and Tommy. It’s so strange that Wanda doesn’t often use other children in her little town. At least she’s not traumatizing them, but it would be nice for her boys to have some other friends their age.

They wave to you as you pass by, but this time they call to you as well.

You’re not sure if you should talk to them at all, but it can’t hurt to play with them a bit, right?

“Hey boys! How are you?” you ask with a smile.

“Great! Do you want to play tag with us?” Tommy jumps down from the monkey bars.

“Sure!” you nod, chasing them around for a while.

Once they’re both out of breath, they sit on one of the benches.

“What’s your name?” Billy asks.

“It’s Y/N,”

“Are you one of our neighbors?”

“Mhmm. I live next door! I live with Agath- Agnes,”

Oh, no. Should you have said that?

“Cool. Are you guys married?”

“Yes, actually,” you laugh.

“I can’t wait to get married. Seems fun. Except for when mommy and daddy fight,”

“They’ve been fighting?”

“Yeah. Daddy thinks mommy is hiding secrets from him. Do you keep secrets from Agnes?”

“None that I can think of,” you shrug. “I’m sure it’ll be alright though, don’t worry. It’ll all be over soon,”

You walk away, hoping you didn’t say too much.

 -

 When Agatha comes home in the evening, she looks a bit angry, which is incredibly rare for her, especially if it’s directed in any way at you.

“Darling,” she takes a deep breath. “Why did you tell the kids that we’re married?”

“I’m so sorry, I ran into them today and it just slipped out,”

“You didn’t remember that I’ve already told Wanda I’m married to a guy named Ralph? Now she’s confused and I need her to trust me!”

“Oh,” you sigh. You totally forgot about that little lie. “Maybe she’ll just think you’re polyamorous or something? It’ll be fine, Aggie,”

“The plan was to make her question herself and this world she created, not us,” she sits on the couch next to you, shaking her head and calming down. “I’m sorry, hun. I just…I want this to work. We’re dealing with some of the most powerful sorcery in the universe here, she could hurt you if she finds out who we are. I can’t let that happen,”

“Thank you for protecting me,” you kiss her. “But we’ll get through all this together. She can’t hurt us as long as we stand by each other,”

#agatha harkness #agatha harkness x reader #wandavision #wandavision x reader #agnes

[ecoamerica]

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[spitfire-of-the-sea]

Ratlines

Little One-Shot about Day-to-Day Spade Pirates life, sat rather in the beginning of their journey once they finally got themselves a nice big ship. :D

My headcanon is that Ace is ridiculously good at all things that demand good body control, balance and a lack of fear.

It was really unfair, Saki mused, how effortless Ace made it all look. Seeing him balance up on the ratlines as if he’d been born up there simultaneously made her want to gawk in awe and scream in frustration. Not even looking where he stepped, he easily maneuvered around, shifting his weight as needed and working the sails as if he’d been doing it all his life, as if he wasn’t several meters up in the air on ropes of seemingly no substance. Watching his sinewy forearms as he gripped a line and started working with it, she could hardly believe that he’d never done more than sail around his little home island until a few weeks ago.

“So – are you guys just there to watch, or is somebody maybe inclined to help me?” he shouted down to them and Saki almost jumped, ripping her eyes from his arms to meet his eyes. He was grinning down at them, black locks tousled by the wind. Once again he had left his yellow shirt unbuttoned, granting her a clear view of his pectorals and toned abdominal muscles. Honestly, he looked like advertisement. For what she wasn’t sure. A romance novel perhaps, or for joining the marines. Or a pirating life. Which, coincidently, she’d done; although in her defense, there had been much less advertising going on back then and mostly it had been gut feeling and a couple of lies to herself that she’d leave on just the next island. Well, several next islands had gone by and she had absolutely no desire to leave anymore – and the advertisement didn’t feature into that. It was just a bonus she enjoyed.

This, she thought, was highly unprofessional. She couldn’t decide whether she and her hormones or he and his obliviousness were to blame. Perhaps both, but she leaned towards blaming him. After all, she could hardly not notice all of it, not after years of learning how to take note of every detail that might come in handy later. And oh boywere there many details to notice about Portgas D. Ace.

“Seriously, guys?” he yelled, putting a hand in his hip, all but pouting. “You’re gonna let me do all the work up here?”

“I’m more of a feet-on-solid-ground-kinda-pirate,” Saber answered, grinning and giving Ace a thumbs up. “But you’re doing a wonderful job up there, captain. Exquisite form, great balance! Keep up the good work!” Ace glared at him.

“I would,” Aggie shouted, quick to make sure his captain knew he was willing. He was fidgeting, looking up at Ace. “But I’m really not good at climbing. I’m sorry, captain! I promise I’ll take care of the anchor instead! In fact, I’ll do it right now!” The big man hastily saluted and then jogged off.

Deuce seemed to still debate with himself whether he should try to help when Saki stripped out of her jacket and handed it to him, just before kicking off her shoes and wiggling her toes in preparation. “Well, Kotatsu lacks opposable thumbs, even though he’s probably better suited than the rest of us in all other regards; and I believe Deuce should probably stay safe, so he can put the shards of my broken bones back into place if I drop from all the way up there. Anyways, I’m coming up! I haven’t done this in a while,” she yelled up at Ace. “So don’t expect too much!”

Kotatsu was sitting half-hidden behind a barrel, peaking out at them as if he was expecting an ambush anytime. Hearing his name, he uttered a soft mewl, and dared to take one step forward, watching her as she moved to the mast and started climbing. It took her a few moments to adjust her movements – it was easy to climb up the first few meters along the mast where a sort of ladder had been worked in, but once she had to step onto the ratlines, it got more challenging. They swayed with the ship, pushed this way and that by the rough sea. She wasn’t afraid of heights, but looking down now and seeing how small Deuce and Saber looked made her gulp. Dropping down from this height would hurt, no matter how well she’d stick the landing.

She didn’t even realize she had closed her hands around the rope in a veritable death grip before Ace was suddenly next to her, beaming at her with a wide smile. “I knew I could count on you!”

Startled, she almost lost her balance for a second, but found it again – just before she felt him move behind her, one foot between to hers. The sturdy width of his chest touched her back briefly and she felt goosebumps run up the length of her spine, sending a shiver through her body. He probably thought she had gotten scared, because he leaned closer, close enough for her to feel the heat he always seemed to emanate. “Don’t worry,” he said quietly, just behind her ear. “I’ve got you.”

One of his hands came to cover hers, gently prying her fingers loose. For a moment she watched, fascinated by how much bigger his hand looked compared to hers. Not that she hadn’t been aware that she was the smallest of the Spade Pirates – she just usually made up for it with her big mouth. Now, though, she couldn’t quite come up with anything to say.

“You don’t have to hold on so tightly. Just make sure your feet are planted firmly. See?” He nudged her feet wider apart with his own and she immediately felt a better balance in her stance.

At least she was sure now, it was definitely his fault that she got so distracted. Every other wave swayed them enough to make his chest brush against her back, reminding her of how little fabric there actually was between them.

“I know, I just have to get used to it again,” she answered with some delay, but made no move to disentangle herself from him. She was fighting bravely to alter the route of her train of thought to a different station. “Where do you want me?”

There was pause and she felt his gaze on her, and only now did she realize the potential innuendo. Eyes widening, she tried to think of a way to make sure this didn’t turn very awkward very quickly, but then he lifted his hand from hers and she almost panicked. Before she could say or do anything, she felt it land on her hip, gently coaxing her to move past him to the other side.

“Let’s get you used to being up here first. Climb over there to the other side and then move up. See that rope line there just below the yard? That’s the foot rope. Once you’re securely there, move to the outer part of the yard. I’ll show you what to do to set sail,” he said quietly, still close to her. “Don’t worry about anything but keeping your balance for now. I’ll be right behind you, I won’t let you fall.”

She swallowed, looking over her shoulder to meet his eyes. He was still smiling at her, a twinkle in his eyes and she didn’t have the faintest trace of doubt that he would indeed catch her if she fell. “You realize that if you’d try to catch me, most likely both of us would be dropping out of the sky like dead birds instead of only just me? Which means two sets of bone shards Deuce has to assemble?” she asked him with the barest lift of an eyebrow.

His smile widened as he shook his head. “Jeez, have some faith in your captain, will you? A lightweight like you won’t be a problem.” His hand on her hip squeezed gently, and he added: “Plus, you won’t fall. You have good sense of balance. Now, come on, move it! We’ve got a sail to set if we want to leave this island!” He shifted and she felt him brush past her to open up the path he had indicated just before. She resisted the reflexive reaction to shudder at the sensation.

“Oi, you two gonna do something interesting or are you set on just snuggling up there?” Saber called out. “I’m getting bored!”

She felt Ace stiffen next to her, but before he could do or say something, she turned to look down at their crewmates. Deuce and Saber stood watching them, hands in hips. “You jealous?” she yelled down. “Should have come up here yourself if you wanted some extra time with the captain in lofty heights!”

“Not sure he’s my type,” Saber shouted back, flashing teeth, “But do let me know if his performance is as good up close as from down here!”

“His performance is for sure better than yours from any point of view,” she answered and stuck out her tongue at him. He clutched his hands to his chest in a dramatic gesture and tumbled away as if she’d shot him. Even from all the way up here she could see Deuce roll his eyes at them.

Ace groaned and she chuckled, looking at him. She couldn’t be sure, but she thought he was actually blushing slightly. Noticing her eyes on him, he seemed startled for a second before quickly averting his eyes to look back down to Saber.

“If you’ve got time to run your mouth, you’ve got time to wash the dishes!” Ace told him sternly. Then, without looking at her, he placed a hand on the top of her head and ruffled her hair, making her yelp and duck away. “And you – get moving! Unless you want me to rate yourperformance!”

Saber was shouting something about tending to his wounded heart, but ambled off towards the kitchen anyhow, and Saki started to climb along the path Ace had indicated to her earlier. True to his word, he was always but a step behind her and once or twice when she struggled to find her footing, she felt his warm hand at the small of her back to help her find it.

She breathed a sigh of relief when she finally reached the footropes he had mentioned, pausing a moment to lean against the mast and catch her breath. Her heart rate definitely had gone up, and she was glad the wind didn’t feel as strong as she’d initially feared.

“You good?” Ace asked and she turned to look at him as he came to stand on the other side of the mast. When she nodded, he beamed at her and with one easy move hopped onto the yard just before extending his hand to her. She stared at it with some confusion.

“I thought you said to get to the footropes? Like… here?” As she spoke, she wiggled her toes for emphasis.

“True,” he answered and beamed at her, “but I thought you might come up here for a second to just enjoy the feeling.” She glanced from his hand to him and then along the yard – sure, it was definitely more solid ground than the ropes were. As she grabbed his hand, he surprised her by lifting her easily up to the yard with one hand. She did manage to keep from flailing, but she was quick to grab at the first best solid thing she could get her hands on – which was Ace. He laughed as her fists bunched into his shirt, feet splayed wide and one hand on the mast as he balanced them both.

“Too fast?” he asked with a grin and if he hadn’t currently been the single static object within arm’s reach, she might have considered revenge. As was, she decided for the more demure route and elected not to answer. Until his grin widened at her lack of reply.

“Is that often a problem for you?” she retorted and almost rolled her eyes at his completely clueless look of confusion. It was no fun to tease if you had to explain the jab first. “No, usually you can keep up just fine,” he answered earnestly and she huffed a breath of laugh.

Ah, sweet, sweet Ace.

“Glad to hear that,” she said and slowly let go of his shirt with a least one hand to try and find her footing again. After a moment, she let go also with her other hand, but kept it outstretched to reach for him again if necessary. He watched as she took a tentative step away from him and then another, spreading out her arms to keep her balance more easily. Once she had reached the outer edge of the yard, she turned on her heel and made her way back to him. She had almost managed when a particularly strong wave made the ship sway and she felt herself tilt to the site. With a yelp she allowed herself to drop onto all fours, hands grabbing for hold just as one foot slipped off completely. Ace was already next to her, his hand firmly closed around her upper arm, while the other held onto the yard tightly to catch both their weights if necessary.

“Are you trying to give me a heart-attack?!” she heard Deuce yell from the ground. “Stop screwing around and come back down here! I don’t even have any equipment to take care of a broken bone!”

Her eyes found Ace’s, who looked her over carefully before breaking out into a smile again. “Good catch,” he said her and she just had to laugh. Just leave it to him to praise you even when you had basically just failed.

“I’m serious!” Deuce warned them. “Nobody is allowed to break a single bone, you hear me?!”

“Loud and clear!” Saki shouted back and climbed down to the rat-lines with Ace’s help, where she could stand more securely. “Now, show me what to do – and then I should probably practice by yard dancing skills a bit, maybe a bit further down for now.”

He smiled at her again, slowly letting go of her arm when he was sure she had a good stance. “Sounds like a plan.”

#ace one piece #one piece #portgas d. ace #gol d. ace #one piece fluff #spade pirates #ace x oc #one piece headcanons #portas d. ace #ace d portgas #masked deuce #spades pirates #spade pirates saki

[libraford]

We interrupt the feral celebration of ousting an oligarch to bring you a story about Yeehaw and his Branch of Mystery.

  It has been a while since we last had some co-worker drama, but man- has it been a weird summer. I mean... we all had a weird summer in 2020, but I don't think I was really expecting this particular... flavor of weird?

 This is a story about Yeehaw, but it starts off with a story about Aggie.

 Aggie was someone we were excited to hire and part of our excitement was that it's rare to find someone with prior floral experience and we'd concluded at this point that it does no one any good to be picky about new hires in the middle of a pandemic. So finding someone who knew the difference between a carnation and a rose was a big deal for us.

 I say that in jest, but saying that we do 'on-the-job training' means that we've had to explain that yes- the flower in my hand that looks like a carnation is a carnation and not some other flower that looks like carnation but is not a carnation. Floristry is a very straightforward practice and for the most part a rose is a rose and a daisy is a daisy and if someone asks for those things, you give it to them.

 The hard part is, as always, making them look good together.

 Which is why we were pleased with Aggie- who previously did weddings for her friends and seemed to have a basic understanding of how to do things with her hands. We were happy to have her aboard.

 ... until you gave her criticism.

 She made her vases embarrassingly short, and if you tried to tell her how to fix it, she'd snap back with "I'm not DONE yet."

 She was done until you said something.

 If you gave her an order for two dozen white roses, she would take it upon herself to mix white and yellow roses together 'because it looks better.'

 It did not.

 Hashtag: #selftaught

 When a client asks for all white roses, there is likely a reason they asked for all white. Given that 90% of our work is funerals, it stands to reason that they are asking for all white because that is a traditional color for mourning. Working with a client means doing exactly what they asked for. Doing a wedding for your friends may get you high praise from people who trust you to work in the same aesthetic as them, but in a shop setting you are being paid to follow things to the letter. Doing so shows that you can follow directions, and they may come back next time.

 You don't know customer entitlement until you've been torn another asshole for leaving out a single rose.

 This seemed to never occur to her, and so criticism was a painful realization that perhaps she wasn't perfect at an art that was exceptionally susceptible to criticism. There were plenty of opportunities to make something in her own aesthetic, it wasn't like she was being stifled. There was a considerable amount of downtime where she filled the front cooler with her own creations- enigmatically giving each of them their own names like "Autumn Walk" or "First Snowfall." (This is not something that we do, on the whole.)

 Not very many of those sold.

 But I think what bugged me the most is that she only ever designed. She didn't take out the trash, she didn't answer phones, she never helped customers. She just... did flowers. Nothing else.

 Oh... and the chatter.

 "Do you travel? Oh, you simply MUST go to Bali sometime! You've never been to Asia? Well, there's nothing like achieving inner peace at a Buddhist temple on a mountaintop in Nepal. They have temples here in Ohio, but it's nothing like the real thing! You say you've never even been off the continent? Well, what are you waiting for? You only live once, you know!"

 Ma'am... we're in the middle of a pandemic. Ma'am... I only get paid so much...

 While trying to relate, I talked about my summer in Montana and she gave me the BIGGEST stank-face. "Montana? Ew, WHY?"

 Look, lady- I lived on a mountaintop next to an active, world-destroying volcano system. If that's not cool, I don't know what is.

 But thankfully, she only worked on weekends. See, this was her fun job. The job she does to stay social during a pandemic and flex her creative muscles while she makes money at her much more lucrative,but boring,HR job. So I only had to see her twice a month when I was manager on duty.

 Then she got fired from her weekday job and went full-time at the flower shop. Poor thing wasn't used to waking up at 7am every day. She was full of suggestions.

 "I think it would be easier for me if we only opened at like... 11am."

"Don't you think we should be taking proper photos of our work? All we would need is a nice camera and a soft lighting setup. Couldn't be much more than $1000."

"Oh I know! We should be doing inventory on tablets instead of writing things down!"

 Okay, you go buy those things then. It took her about a week of making those suggestions to realize that she wasn't real clear on how things worked around here and stopped. She became quiet, less enthusiastic about her 'fun' job now that she wasn't immediately the star of the show.

 Enter Yeehaw.

 We were excited about Yeehaw, too. He didn't just have experience with flowers- he had experience with a flower shop. He gave a good interview, he seemed like he knew what he was doing and was very passionate about flowers. He was definitely an entire hippie, but about 1/3 of all plant people are. Most importantly, we still had like three spots to fill left from our pre-Covid staff.

 Hired.

 There was an overlap of about a week where Aggie and Yeehaw worked at the same time. His work was... immaculate. Just... astonishingly beautiful work. You didn't even have to show him how to make anything. He just... knew.

 Well, Aggie didn't  like that much- we had only nice things to say about this new guy but all she ever got was criticism. And if we complimented him on something he made, he would give a little 'namaste' bow. And I could see her fuming with rage each time he did this.

 One day, she rushed into the back to take a phone call and any time someone went back there for a vase she would lower her voice as if keeping a deep secret. Twenty minutes later, she called Grandpa into the back as well to discuss something. Ten minutes later, Aggie left the building with her Live, Laugh, Love bag, looking pissed.

 "Where did Aggie go," I asked Grandpa.

 "She got a new job," she said. "Doing HR somewhere."

 "She didn't even say good-bye," Blue said, appearing unsurprised.

 And so we went on with out lives without really putting much further thought into Aggie, apart from the occasional 'you simply MUST visit Bali' line thrown in for bougie emphasis.

 Which brings us to the next part of the story, and that is Yeehaw.

 There are some details to know about Yeehaw that are kind of difficult to fit into a story neatly. Here is a brief list that may come in handy to know later.

-He lives with his mother.

-He drives a Tesla.

-He can afford the Tesla because he was in a terrible wreck that had him hospitalized, and a lawsuit was won.

-Because of this, he has two screws in his head at the temples.

-Unrelated, he has hair that goes all the way down to his back.

- And...

 "Grandpa, we need to tell you something," Blue said. "In private."

 Blue and Kali pulled Grandpa aside while Yeehaw slowly put together a funeral order. "Grandpa, there's no polite way to put this: Yeehaw is drunk as fuck."

 "He smells like whiskey," Kali said.

 "He's stumbling everywhere."

 "And he won't stop... burping."

 Grandpa paused. "There's something I need to tell you," she said, and she reached for a manila folder. "Yeehaw has something called... what's it called..." She leafed through the file and produced a paper, reading from it. "Auto-brewery Syndrome. His body actually produces alcohol anytime he eats bread or sugar. If he's drunk, it's because he can't help it."

 We each had a chance to go over the doctor's note, verifying that yes- that sure does look official. Everyone had questions, but it did answer the one I had about why he was sitting in the break room literally drinking peanut butter from the jar.

 So that was incredibly interesting and we no longer asked about the burping or why he was so slow.  

 However, the fact that he was so slow was extremely frustrating. Our average number of orders runs approximately 100 per-day. This can be eased somewhat when we have a full-staff with five designers- an average of 20 designs per person in an 8-hour day, 3 per hour.

 But it's a fine line some days, and if one person cannot keep up it turns into a struggle for all of us.  

 We did our best to accommodate. We gave him all the day-ahead orders so that we wouldn't be behind and he'd have all the time he'd need to make his gorgeous pieces.

 We were willing to make it work.

 A number of factors came into play one day, but most notably: Yeehaw's Tesla wouldn't start and he had to take the bus. So he was late.

 I think I saw him make one entire item in the two hours that we were in the same room. He went to lunch around 12:30, I took mine around 1:00. I saw him stumble back in from lunch, looking... out of it. Just... absolutely incomprehensible- mumbling, barely upright, his hair out of the bun, quite possibly sleepwalking- who knows?

 I saw him for that brief Sasquatch moment... and that was the last that I saw him that day. It was around 4:00 that  Grandpa asked the question:

 "Where's Yeehaw?"

 And no one had an answer. We all had places that we thought we'd seen him: cleaning the cooler, in the break room, heading to the bathroom... but no one had really... seen him since he stumbled back in around 1:30.

 We checked all these places.

 None of them.

 The person who actually managed to find him was Sarge, who noticed his feet sticking out from behind the bushes behind the building.

 "Huh," he said, presumably. He gave the feet a light kick and Yeehaw slowly sat back up. "Hey dude. You... okay, there? They're lookin' for you inside."

 Yeehaw mumbled something to Sarge and got to his feet, stumbling back into the shop without further interaction. He appeared into the workspace, holding a branch in front of his face for mysterious reasons. There were still twigs entangled in his long hair.

 "Where were you at," Grandpa asked, concerned.

 "Oh, I was in the bathroom," he lied from behind the branch of mystery. "I'm pretty tired. Is it okay if I go home?"

 Bewildered, Grandpa gave him permission to leave. It was soon after he left that Scout found his phone in the empty sink. "Who's trying to wash their phone," he asked in the loud manner that is characteristic of old white men. It rang while in his hand and one of our designers snatched it from him. It was his mother.

 "Hello," said the designer. "Yeehaw went home early, but he left his phone behind. Can you bring it home to him?" Mom agreed, she was just over at Trader Joe's anyhow.

 We thought, of course, that we were doing something smart and nice. Yeehaw's mom looks just about what you would expect the mother of a 30-year-old hippie that drives a Tesla to look. Grandpa, in a polite way, explained that he'd fallen asleep in a bush. To which Mom seemed neither surprised nor concerned about his behavior.

 "Okay. I'll be at Hallmark."

 Somewhere between the bus stop and Bexley, Yeehaw must have realized that his phone was not with him and so he came back looking for it. Despite his mother being literally in the same strip mall as we were, he seemed irritated that we'd taken the initiative to make sure his phone got to him.

 "Well, I bet if you just went down to Hallmark she'd give you your phone and probably give you a ride home."

 He mumbled something and then left.

 This seems like a decent place to pause, because him leaving the second time in the day should be the end of the story. However... at 5:00 in the evening there was still two hours left in the work day and from past experience... that is plenty of time for a lot of things to happen.

 The thing to happen was a phone call.

 "Hi, this is Jade from the main store. We've gotten... some... interesting phone calls. Is there... a... hmm... is there a dead body out in front of your store?"

 Pause.

 "We'll take care of it, bye."

 Who wants to be the one to poke the cadaver on the sidewalk? A volunteer from the audience! Ms Crowe: won't you come down?!

 I have had it planted firmly in my mind that Crowe certainly understands the concept of fear but does not recognize it. Apart from being one of our most reliable drivers, she is also a performer, a street medic, an activist, and most notably... a fire-breather.

 You have your hobbies.

 Point is- she's brave enough to check to see if the person laying on the sidewalk was dead or simply overdosed.

 As it turns out, it was Yeehaw- curled up in the fetal position with his arm covering his face.

 "Hey," Crowe said, poking him with her foot. "Heeeeeeey," she said again but more firmly this time. He moved, blinking in the evening the sun. "Buddy, you can't be laying around on the sidewalk. You gotta move on."

 Again, he slowly got to his feet. At this time, his mother emerged from Hallmark to see him talking with Crowe. A group of four people escorted him into Mom's car while he stopped every few feet to perform another 'namaste' bow.

 You think this is the end. But what have we learned?

 There's always more.

 He came in the next day as if none of this had happened. Conversation was difficult because we both desperately needed to know what the fuck happened and also did not want to trigger something. So we didn't bring it up. He apologized for leaving early: chronic fatigue syndrome, you know.

 Other places would have fired him, but we're a very forgiving workplace. Falling asleep on company time is not, in any way, the worst thing that someone has done at this location while still keeping their job. There was Sugar and her drugs, there was the dude that used the company van to pick up prostitutes (this was before my time), there was the guy that screamed at customers over the phone... it's a long list.

 The primary concern of our employers is whether or not you are a reliable person. If you routinely show up for your job and do the work, you're going to be okay at least for a little bit. And Yeehaw, for all his impeccable fuckery, at least showed up every day.

 We kept this at the back of our minds.

 One day, after the Day We Found Him In a Bush was behind us, one of the designers mentioned that they'd seen where Aggie works now. It was not in HR.

 It was our major competitor.

 Now, Grandpa knows this competitor well. She knows all her competition. It is the nature of a lot of florists to, once they've gotten sick of one place, move on to the next one and spill the beans on their operations there. So Grandpa gets the dirt on everyone.

 This particular shop was very regimented. You don't wing it- you follow the recipe as listed. He's been known to pick discarded flowers up off the floor and tell you exactly how much  money you're costing the company by letting it fall, to the cent. If you get so far as to make casket sprays, he will take your first one and chuck it across the room if it even looks like the stems are in there too loosely.

 This is what I mean about us being an easy place to work.

 Hashtag: #ohfuck.

 People come in and out of your life like that, in little ways. Sometimes you just have to have a little laugh at it. But what I thought was funny was that she felt the need to keep her new employer a secret, as though we would get jealous or tattle. Curious thing.

 Now that the glamour of Yeehaw's arrangements had worn off, we were starting to see more and more odd behaviors that didn't seem completely related to drunkenness.

 "Did you just fart?"

 "No, that was a spider barking."

 Amazing.

 Conversation with him was becoming... difficult. As I sat in the break room with my quick lunch and he drank soup out of a mayonnaise jar, he mentioned his area of study in college.

 "Cognitive Psychology and Hindu Philosophy, huh? That's an interesting combination."

 "Yeah," he said, funneling an amount of squash soup down his throat. "It'll take the rest of the world about 100 years before they catch up to where I am."

 I sat, posed in front of my beef and broccoli which I was eating with a fork, trying to process a logical reason why the rest of the world will be sleeping in a bush in one hundred years. "Uh... huh."

 This was followed by another thirty minutes of silence where I desperately wanted to know what he meant by that but didn't want to be the one to ask him.

 People will tell you that a hippie is generally an ineffective, benign kind of person who chants 'love love, peace peace' in a circle and consider that to be an action for change. But I can say with absolute certainty that I have met some downright egotistical hippies in my life. Those were lessons in bias- which I will have to save for other times.

 Eventually, Grandpa became frustrated with his slowness. We presumed that his speed of choice was a combination of his meticulous nature and his various ailments, but with the Christmas season coming upon us it was becoming much more than a series of symptoms.

 Previous persons who lacked speed were chatty, would play on their phone, or get distracted. But Yeehaw... Yeehaw simply moved like a tranquilized sloth. He slowly picked off each leaf, each thorn, each guard petal and took a minute for each action. He would put in his greens and then contemplate it powerfully for ten minutes before putting any flowers in... slowly.

 In the time spent doing this, I had already made something of a similar size and was starting on the second one.

 It was during one of these times that Grandpa finally said something.

 "Yeehaw, that spray is due in thirty minutes. Is there a way you can go any faster?"

 He looked up from his greens, held one carnation to his face, and said:

 "If you wanted me to move faster, you would pay me better."

 Let me start by saying that we do not get paid well. We don't. Compared to other flower shops in our city, we are probably the lowest-paid. This is something that the company is starting to work on with benefits and raises, but any amount of change takes time. (And its still better paying than when I worked in retail. But that's another book.)

 Yeehaw had been here for exactly one month. I don't know a single workplace that gives you a raise after one month and still lets you sleep on the clock without firing you. He knew what he was getting paid when we hired him.

 So anyways, he slowly grinds down our nerves to a very fine dust- burping, farting, falling asleep on his feet, staring intensely into space, talking about how much he should be making but isn't, bragging about his enlightenment, and generally just slowing down production.

 And then Grandpa had her well-earned vacation week. Blue was in charge for the most part and the week leading up to Halloween is generally pretty slow, so it was a good week for her to have a break with few mishaps.

 Eh... hehe. Yeah.

 Yeehaw... disappeared again. We checked the cooler, we checked the break room, we checked the bushes out back, we checked the sidewalk out front.

 He was in the bathroom.

 So we left it.

 He was still in the bathroom an hour later.

 We had one of the male drivers pound on the door to check on him. When Yeehaw opened the door to the men's room, there was a wad of toilet paper on the floor that he'd been using as a pillow.

 If I may pause here to explain- our men's room is disgusting. I have deep cleaned it several times only for it to become a germ-fest once more in a matter of hours. I don't ask who is peeing all over the floor because, honestly, I have no desire to know what grown man can't aim his willy in the right direction.

 So in order to fall asleep in the bathroom, you have to be willing to sleep in pee. During a pandemic.

 He reappeared in the workroom, put his apron back on, looked around at all of us still working and said: "Wow, it must be really hard to get fired here."

 It was at this point that Blue informed Grandpa.

 "Tell him that he's fired," Grandpa said, clearly 1001% done with this.

 "I'm not going to fire him," Blue said. "I don't think I can fire anyone."

 So she had the driver that found him do it, which was confusing for all of us. He ended up calling Grandpa to clarify. And by 'clarify,' I definitely mean 'beg for his job back.' A synopsis of the 20 minute phone call went like this:

 "What do you mean, I'm fired?"

 "Just that. You're fired. I'm tired of it, Yeehaw. You don't work here anymore."

 "Why?"

 "What do you mean 'why?' You spend all day making a total of three arrangements and then you wander off somewhere and fall asleep."

 "I can't help it if I have chronic fatigue syndrome!"

 "This is a physical job. If your body can't handle an 8-hour shift without falling asleep for two hours, this isn't the job for you. Tell me: where is that fair to the girls that you do 3% of the work while they pick up the slack and you wander off to sleep on the clock?"

 "I simply do not care about them."

 "You don't care that you're shoving all the work on your coworkers, and that's why you're fired."

 "I wish you'd given me a warning."

 "Tell me, Yeehaw: how many employers can you find that will allow you to sleep on the clock for two hours and let you off with a warning?"

 End of discussion.

 Now, you're probably wondering where Aggie comes back into this. Just hold tight, I'll get there.

 The Sunday after he was fired, he came in to pick up his paycheck. I was busy handling a minor emergency where one of our funeral homes forgot to order a spray and I had to make one as fast as I could. We held a brief conversation while I made the spray in a hurry.

 "I'm here to pick up my check," he said while I greened the spray and leafed through the paychecks simultaneously.

 "Here you go," I said, handing it to him without much fanfare. I presumed that he was looking for sympathy or some kind of followup or... I don't know. Sorry you suddenly care about your job?

 "So what are your next plans," one of the designers asked, trying to coax more information out of him while I did the work of three people.

 "It's kind of funny," he said slowly... as he did all things. "I've only ever been fired from flower shops." He paused, thoughtfully. "I think I'm going to go apply to the shop in Bexley that Aggie went to."

#as the world turnips

[ak8shi]

Atsumu + Sakusa + Akaashi reacting to you tying up your hair Tiktok prank (pt. 2)

Part 1

warnings: slightly suggestive/nsfw?? I guess, mentions of dick, some spoilers !

a/n: tysm for giving the first part so much love, it makes me so happy to think so many people enjoyed it <3

 Miya Atsumu

Can I get an F in the chat for this man

He isn’t ready to be played like this aha

So you are sitting in his living room, watching a movie

You’re both sitting on the couch, you sitting between his legs with a big bowl of buttery popcorn he probably doesn’t even eat it because of his stupid healthy diet

All you can focus on is the prank you saw on Tiktok, I mean it’s the perfect opportunity

You’re already kind of between his legs where you belong

You pretend to spill a bit of the popcorn on the carpet and if we’re being honest he would be an ass about it

Him: you’re so cute when you’re clumsy 🧚🏼‍♀️💗✨now go trip over the ledge of my apartment balcony 🥰💫💞

LMAO so you get down from your previous position, and you manage to set up your phone on the corner of the little side table near the couch

Atsumu is so absorbed in the movie his aggy ass doesn’t even notice

You place your hand on his outer thigh, slightly stroking it

NOW HE’S PAYING ATTENTION

You start to put your hair up in a ponytail, and I think he would be genuinely surprised at your boldness for a second but then he’s like,, IT’S HORNY O’CLOCK

Him: Aha ahaha I know baby,,…. I’m just irresistible like that 🤪🥴

AAKSKKSS his vibes are something else he belongs to the streets

You, looking him dead in the face: oh ? I’m just on the ground picking up the popcorn I spilled like the lowly peasant I am :)) Don’t mind me !

Cue pouting Atsumu he honestly needs someone to put him in his place

Now he’s doting on you and being super cute, trying to get you to get back into his lap

“Babyyyy, I didn’t mean to mouth off at ya, c’mere and I’ll show you what else this mouth can do”

CRINGE LMAO,,,, he’s trying though and somehow the prank went an entirely different direction

You’ve been holding out on smiling or showing any type of emotion on your face, but then you crack and start smiling

You finally tell him it was a prank

You: I remember the words “I’m just irresistible like that” specifically coming out of your mouth

Him: well did I lie

You decide against posting it for his wellbeing, the tiktok community would’ve chewed him up and spit him out💀

Sakusa Kiyoomi

Oh god,,,, do not put him on the spot like thisss

Atsumu and Bokuto somehow convinced you to pull one on your boyfriend

You in the groupchat called MonSter BootY 🅱️itches: u guys he will simply step on me

Bokuto and Atsumu: Sis, that’s why it’s going to be so funny, you’ll thank us when you go viral

Anyways, the two boys offer to hide and record the whole thing in the locker room after practice

Sakusa comes out of his fifth shower of the day and is like,,, why are you in here

You: oh you know,,, just hanging out 🥰

He’s probably shirtless too,,, sheesh

Atsumu and Bo are hiding out in one the showers Atsumu has to cover Bokuto’s mouth the entire time

Sakusa is rolling his eyes at you, he’s just like whatever I’m almost done and then we can go

He’s standing near you while you sit on a bench he definitely tells you to get off it because of how many germs are on it and for the simple fact that Atsumu’s ass touches it

I’m screaming you’re already stifling your laugh knowing Atsumu is HEATED behind the shower curtain hearing that

Okay so you give the boys the cue to start recording, asking Omi to give you a kiss on the cheek

Usually this man would NOT do this in front of his teammates,,, but since he thinks he’s alone he makes an exception

He leans down to carefully press a kiss to your turned cheek, and then you make your move

You gently knock your phone down smooth

You get down on the ground, brushing your hand along his leg and calf

At this point you’re sure Atsumu and Bo are LOSING IT

And so you pull the hair tie from your wrist, putting your hair up in a messy bun

He’s looking down at you kind of intensely, and you think for a second that he might go along with the prank you: I like the view

You: oops I dropped something 😉

Him, stepping away from you: oh my god,, get up right this instant or I will not be able to legally touch you for the next week

THE EMBARRASSMENT,,,, you can’t recover from this he is so grossed out LMAO

You reluctantly pick up your phone and get up, hearing the boys’ thundering footsteps as they sprint out of the locker room,, laughing their asses off

He doesn’t even care about them at this point, he’s just like we need to get you home and into the shower IMMEDIATELY,,,

Sakusa looking at the Tiktok later: what do you mean it only went viral because I’m shirtless

You, looking at his Amazon purchases: why did you order so many gardening knee pads

Him: I know how to treat a girl right sweetie

Akaashi Keiji

Listen, this man is so freaky on the DL,, you’re like there’s no way you can’t get a reaction out of him

So you decide to surprise your boyfriend during lunch at his internship for a top publishing company

You are so proud of him and you make him so happy:((( please

Because of this, you decide to not post the Tiktok in case it jeopardizes his career!!

He’s so excited to see you, he’s grinning and softly holding your hand to lead you back to his secret lunch spot

You: Keiji why are we in a bathroom stall

Him: bold of you to assume I have friends here

You’re like, okay not what I was expecting but I can still make this work

It’s like one of those super fancy bathrooms with a lounge area and table, so you both sit down there

Keiji goes to lock the door so it isn’t awkward if someone comes in to take a piss and you’re just stuffing your face with dick food

You made/bought his favorites and he’s so thankful to not be alone for once during his lunch break I am crying

He’s sitting next to you, eating his favorite licorice candy with his arm slung around your waist

You think it’s the perfect time to do the prank, so you start putting your plan into action

You drop your napkin onto the floor as he’s telling you about how whack his supervisor is, and you bend down to pick it up

He doesn’t really think anything of it, letting go of your waist so you can grab it, expecting you to come back to your previous position

You don’t LOL

On the ground you hold onto Keiji’s knee he do be manspreading in front of you

You hear him gulp, and then you go to tie your hair, up, looking up at him through your lashes

You: sorry I dropped my napkin 😊 let me grab that really quick

You’re not really sure how things progressed so fast, but the next thing you know he’s leaning forward, his hand is gripping your cheeks and he’s sternly staring at you,,, oh so he’s HOT hot

“Don’t tease me like that right now sweetheart”

Let me move my bangs because,,,

He brings your mouth to his, you can taste the licorice that he had been previously eating

The kiss is kind of ROUGH,, like a warning , and then he pulls away going back to his normal self, popping another licorice into his mouth

.. speechless..

You: why do you ruin my fun

Him: I will not hesitate to dick you down right here

You: you have such a way with words ❤️

Him: anyways,,, let me explain to you why I suspect my supervisor is a cancer

The video ends up being too sexual to post but are you complaining ??

#THIS WAS SO FUN TO WRITE PLEASE #I MIGHT have gone a little overboard but i was in a groove 🥰🥰🥰 #luv these boys #atsumu #sakusa #akaashi #miya atsumu #sakusa kiyoomi #akaashi keiji #atsumu x reader #sakusa x reader #akaashi x reader #hq #haikyuu!! #atsumu hc #atsumu headcanons #atsumu imagines #sakusa headcanons #sakusa imagines #akaashi hcs #akaashi headcanons #akaashi imagine #hq x reader #haikyuu headcannons #haikyuu imagine #haikyu x reader #headcannons #mine

[timberwolf-wwe-marvel]

A new Family

Ch.1  Ch.2  Ch.3 Ch.4 Ch.5 Ch.6  Chapter 7

Summary: Phantom likes his new suit; he doesn’t expect to be on the news the following day, nor do his parents.

Patrol, for one thing, is boring; flying around is one thing, stopping crime is another.  “So we just wait, boring,” Timberwolf grunts; he doesn’t like the wait either, but ever since his debut, it’s been quiet.  “Only the crazy ones come out at night, and to answer your question on Bruce and me, yes.”  Phantom blinks, then smile, “Sam and Tucker owe me twenty bucks each,” Timberwolf rolls his eyes; of course, the bet would happen.  Phantom shoots up suddenly, looking toward the east, “I hear something.”

Both waist no time, heading toward the noise; they stop at a steeple overlooking the bank below.  “Wait, let’s see what happens,” two minutes go by, then a fog glides out of doors.  “Vaporgust,” both look at each other, Phantom shrugs, “Some news is worth watching.”  Timberwolf drops down, Phantom invisible behind him, “Vaporgust.”  She looks up; her face is barely recognizable, “Stand down, Vaporgust.”

“Or what, gonna haul me off to that bio-chem lab joint in Gotham?”  Phantom appears behind her, “No, he’s just getting tired of your game of stop the crook,” she spins around.  “Oh yeah, short stack.  You need to learn some manners,” her hands form into balls of air, swinging down.  Phantom catches the balls, using his cryokinesis to freeze her; she screams, morphing away.

Both run after her, “Phantom,” Timberwolf hands over some capsules; Phantom channels his ecto-ice into the capsules.  Vaporgust blasts them with hot air, sending them flying; Phantom inhales.  Timberwolf throws a small disc, releasing a powerful octave wave; Vaporgust screams.  “Now, Phantom!”  Throwing the capsules, they shatter at the frequency, spreading the ice into her gustly form.

A light shines on them; both look up; above them is a news helicopter from WRAL Raliegh.  Phantom waves, “Come on, let’s get going,” both mount the approaching motorcycle.  Phantom sighs, changing back into Fenton; Timberwolf smiles, pulling into the den.  “Come on, let’s get to bed,”  Daniel says, having removed his suit; Danny sighs, leaning against the older man.  

The morning sun rises above the Romanova household; Daniel makes his coffee.  Ellie and Danny enter the kitchen; following them is Jazz.  “Good morning, you lot; breakfast is in five minutes after this cup of coffee.”  Jazz grabs some plates from the cabinets, “Brother, sister, help set the table first.”  Both groan, grabbing silverware from the drawers; Daniel opens the fridge.

“French toast, anyone,” Daniel cracks some eggs, whisking them in the bowl.  Jazz places down the final plate, glancing at the TV; Timberwolf and Phantom are on screen.  “Guys,” the others look over; Jazz increases the volume.  “This was the scene moments ago, Amity Parks’ very own Phantom fighting alongside Timberwolf.  Not much is known as to why Phantom was with Timberwolf last night, but Vaporgust is now receiving treatment for the unexplainable powers she has gained.

However, one question remains; why is Phantom in North Carolina, and is this team-up permanent or temporary?  I’m Aggie Grace of WRAL in Fayetteville.”  It cuts to commercials; Jazz turns to the men with a glare, “How come I don't have a new suit too?”  All three look at Ellie, Daniel smiles, “Because you were unexpected, but you’re still joining us in Gotham.  And Jazz, I wanted to spend time with Danny alone, and he proved he can handle his against ghosts and criminals.”

Jazzs’ glare falters, earning a sigh, “I’m not surprised by both of you and thanks for giving us a roof to live under.”  Daniel hugs Jazz, the older sister huffing against him, “You have nothing to thank me for, any of you.”  Danny and Ellie enter the embrace, he holds them close.  “Besides, the house gets quiet far too often for my liking.”  A quiet voice speaks up; Daniel stiffens at the words, “Thank you, Dad.”

Amity Park

07:14

Maddie sets the table, “Jack, can you,” a picture of Phantom startles her.  She calls for her husband, “Jack, get up quick.  Phantom is on TV.”  The oversized man enters the kitchen, guns at the ready.  “This was the scene moments ago, Amity Parks’ very own Phantom fighting alongside Timberwolf.  Not much is known as to why Phantom was with Timberwolf last night, but Vaporgust is now receiving treatment for the unexplainable powers she has gained.

However, one question remains; why is Phantom in North Carolina, and is this team-up permanent or temporary?  I’m Aggie Grace of WRAL in Fayetteville.”  Maddie rests her hands on her hips, “Timberwolf, what does Phantom want with them?”  Both stiffen, “Phantom is overshadowing them; last time we fought, he could clone himself; he must’ve duplicated before the overshadowing occurred.”  Jack runs down to the lab, “The Fenton peeler should work in this case, don't you think, Maddie!?”

Amity Park- Mayors Mansion

When Vlad awoke that morning, he made himself some tea, turning on the news.  His tea is discarded at the picture before him.  “This was the scene moments ago, Amity Parks’ very own Phantom fighting alongside Timberwolf.  Not much is known as to why Phantom was with Timberwolf last night, but Vaporgust is now receiving treatment for the unexplainable powers she has gained.  However, one question remains; why is Phantom in North Carolina, and is this team-up permanent or temporary?  I’m Aggie Grace of WRAL in Fayetteville.”

As the screen cuts, Vlad hums to himself, “Why would he be there indeed?”  A Cheshire cat-like grin spreads across his face, “Time for some Fenton TV.”  The screen glitches, revealing the Fentons’ lab; ignoring them, he skips before Phantom flees.  He regrets it, that’s for sure, seeing as the two ‘guardians’ treat Phantom like a non-emotional being.  Thank goodness for Jasmine, saving her brother from what could’ve been the end of his half-life.

Ghost Zone

09:15

The master of time, Clockwork, hovers before the looking glass, seeing a stunning image.  A smile spreads across his face; even if young Daniel would try to stuff him in a thermos, his new fate is sealed.  Standing between Nightwing and Phantom are the mentors, Timberwolf and Batman.  Each side has a group of teens; Canary, Polly Geist, Techie, and Ivory Oak are standing next to Phantom.  Just behind them is, supposedly, the former future evil self of Phantom, Dan Phantom.

#Danny Phantom #OC #jazz fenton #dani phantom #Dan Phantom #clockwork #Vlad Masters #vlad plasmius #maddie fenton #jack fenton

[ecoamerica]

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

#ACLA24 #ACLA24Leaders #youtube #youtube video #climate leaders #climate solutions #climate action #climate and environment #climate #climate change #climate and health #climate blog #climate justice #climate news #weather and climate #environmental news #environment #environmental awareness #environment and health #environmental #environmental issues #environmental justice #environment protection #environmental health #Youtube