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aggresivelyfriendly · 3 years

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‘Tis the Damn Season- Chapter 2

Winter Wonderland

Hello loveys! Here is chapter two, a new year, a new world, a new Harry video! Thank you to @dirtystyles for fixing my tenses, which I promptly messed up by revising and adding. All remaining mistakes are mine.

Happy reading- reblogs are love!

Emma was annoyed before she even caught her flight, but she loved airports, so she got lost in watching the peculiar things people did in the there to sublimate what was probably just anxiety. She'd once watched a boys' trip, maybe a bachelor party, get on a plane and begin toasting at 5:30 am. The groom had almost bought the whole plane a round, but one of his mates had stopped him. She assumed this wasn't his first beer of the day, but maybe it was the last of the night before?

People acted different in airports.

That had been her first flight to Holland. When she went to her interview at Wageningen University and Research Center. She really needed to impress, she'd pressed her outfit more than she had ironed anything since she'd been taught to do it. This was her dream school and the climate research they did was groundbreaking and she wanted to be part of it so much that she was willing to do whatever it took. Beyond the heavy course load she could expect during the regular school years, the top students got amazing summer work or internships. She'd promised herself she would not be going home for breaks for some time. Honestly she was just fine with that. There wasn't much left for her in Holmes Chapel.

There wasn't much in Holmes Chapel at all.

She'd wanted to move from the little village the minute they'd moved there when she was eleven. Sure it was cute, picturesque and maybe something out of a Jane Austen novel, but Emma did not read much Pride and Prejudice. Though she definitely had seen Mr. Darcy come out of the pond. Honestly, she was more of a nonfiction girl, and she like investigative reporting. She'd missed London pretty much immediately and begged to go back for months. It was a time in her life she would have called the absolute worst, until it became the foundation for the best years. Emma made really good, motivated friends. Big dreams were common in little Holmes Chapel, so Emma fit right in. It may have never felt like home exactly, but she made a home of those friends.

Gemma was one of them. She had done her share of Austen reading. Reading in general, and she had the sweetest family. Her little brother Harry was so nice to their mum, though he loved nothing more than bugging Gemma. Like all little brothers. She'd heard at least, Emma was an only child.

All her parents' hopes and dreams rested right on her shoulders.

But theirs weren't nearly so weighty as her own. Even then she knew she was going to save the planet, or at the very least reduce the number of climate refugees.

Now, after two summers in Reykjavik, she was more into sustainable energy and zero waste production, but she was still trying to change the climate game.

She would really rather be going back to Iceland now. A friend had invited her to see the Northern Lights. They were most active in the winter and she'd only caught glimpses of them during her summer internships. It may have been the experience of a lifetime.

But her mother had laid on a major guilt trip. Emma hadn't been back to little Holmes Chapel in two years. She'd come home that first Christmas because she was tired, overwhelmed, still adjusting to her school schedule, and a little homesick. Her mother told her so. She'd even skipped the Twist's Christmas party, which was the shindig of the season. She'd slept right through it, and only seen Gemma at the pub later. She hadn't been up for company, but Gemma was family.

This year? After a year's absence, she'd be going. And she'd receive the hometown-hero-returns treatment. Though she was sure her reception at the airport would consist of her mum with a single sign. When she did make it to the pub, she might see a few friendly faces besides Gemma. Last time? Since she'd missed the party, she didn't have anything to contribute to the discussion. She'd just listened to everybody else rehash it. Normally, that would be fine, but she already felt removed, and had always felt a bit like a screw among nails in Holmes Chapel, so she was determined to go to the party this year. She had all kinds of plans, how many hours she'd socialize, rest, and read.

The flight was easy at least, and the train up to Manc doubly so. She liked to sleep on trains, something about the rocking, and she resumed her old habit of sleeping wrapped around her backpack.

"Welcome home, love!" Her mother shouted and Emma actually got a little misty, just like her Mum. Maybe she should try to get home more than once a year, but there's just so much she wants to accomplish. She even had a list. All the things she wanted to do before she turned thirty. It's been revised of course, she'd not unrealistic. Once the list is complete, she can have a life outside her ambitions, like a real boyfriend.

There's not much time for anything but hook-ups for the next ten years., and Emma was ok with that.

Up til now. She might need another pass at her bullet points, or to at least read her goals again when she got to the Twist's new brick beauty of a house. Harry had bought his mum a new home, one not watched as closely by his obsessive fans. They hadn't found this one yet.

Emma could see why they followed him around so, and why some people risked it all for a certain face. His face, his very famous, gorgeous face.

It was so weird that Harry wasn't just Gemma's little brother who grew up cute anymore. His music wasn't really her style, though some of the songs were catchy and Emma did like his latest album. She caught herself humming about life stories long after she heard it, and she seemed to hear his latest single playing in lots of shops and restaurants, even in Holland.

At the party, she also found herself in the same room as Harry more often than she can find an excuse for. Her eyes also seemed to find him a lot, she knew because of how many times she had to whip her head away quickly. As a tactic, that didn't work because he was always either already looking at her,or he immediately turned like he knews where she was. Maybe her gaze had weight, or she was as subtle as an axe.

When he smirked at her the tenth time their eyes lit upon each other, she choked on her wine.

What the fuck?

She'd finally got herself calmed from that little encounter. Mostly because she left the room to find a loo. The water she splashed on her face was cold and woke her up. "What are you doing, girl?" Emma asked her reflection but found that she couldn't help but smile at herself, and bite her lip. The flush on her cheeks was lovely; she could blame the wine, everyones favorite excuse.

An hour later she was pleasantly tipsy, the kind of buzz you could maintain and still wake up the next day not regretting, and she'd gone to the kitchen to grab another glass to nurse her merry state. "Be right back. We need another round!" She was calling back to Gemma when she bumped into a tall lanky body. She caught his hips with one hand and found them with just enough give to grip. "Oof!" She exclaimed before looking up to see how much damage her wine had done. Good thing she drank white, there was a growing spot ok his sweater. Wait a second! Then she coasted her head up the lovely lilac sweater toward his face. "That's my sweater." She said first off, bopping his chin.

"Um, no, mine now." Oh, his voice was adorably thick with drink too. "You give it to Gem or something?"

What was he talking about? Her eyes stayed with his and she was kinda trapped in his greens when she realized he meant the sweater. She had, right. "I'm yeah, years ago. Was my favorite and we shared it a lot. I decided she should have it before I moved. And I guess she decided you should have it when you moved. Though I expect your life change was a little different than mine. Yours was like overnight and mine a life long plan, and oh my god, Emma stop talking." She would have kept rambling except, well, he kissed her, right on the mouth and held his overfilled lips to her own. No, overfilled wasn't true. They were full, but not crazy big, they just were so plump at the edges. God, when had she thought about Harry's lips so much.

Right now, as much as she could think of anything, it was Harry's lips. She'd relaxed into his rhythm and was following his lead when her free hand took on a mind of its own and coasted from his hips up his back and into his hair. He groaned a little before he disengaged and then chuckled.

"Well," he said as the offending hand went to her mouth. Maybe she did need to stop drinking. That was bold, unlike her, and strange. But wait! What just happened? Why did he kiss her?.

"Huh?"

"I think that beat my last mistletoe kiss and I'd convinced myself that was impossible!" He was giving her a knowing look, like a wink in his smile. Did he kiss somebody else tonight? She looked up at him and tried not to be annoyed, or feel jealous, or focus on the shape of his mouth, still a little wet from her kiss. Was he just hanging out by the mistletoe like a weirdo? Seemed odd for a bloke people were lining up to meet, let alone kiss.

"Why'd you do that?" She found her voice to ask. It was rusty, like she hadn't just been laughing and talking for hours with people she'd forgotten how much she enjoyed.

"You bumped into me under the mistletoe. I assumed you wanted me to." Well, she did while he was kissing her, but now he was being a bit of an ass.

"Um, you were just in the way..."

"Well, I'll have to find myself in your path as often as possible then." Ok, that was cute, a bit cocky, like the smirk on his face. Then his face flushed and his dimples were so deep and she decided that shift, from smirky pop star to hometown mumma's boy was the best quick change she had ever seen. "Ah, see, that got you to smile!" He bopped her nose and she knew her own dimple pressed in even further.

"Nah, you're a little shit, but I like your smile. Especially when you blush." The color he turned then made her laugh out loud. She felt drunk when she realized how long they'd been staring at each other grinning. She was counting her drinks a second later when he caught her off guard again.

"Where'd you just go?"

"Wha'?" Oh boy, she'd dropped her t, she was really home now.

"We were having a moment." He motioned between their faces. "Then you went in your head. Lost your attention, didn't like it at all."

Then he caught her hand, their fingers entwined together like their lips moments before. It was hot in there. Emma shook her head and glanced around, but she didn't untangle them. She looked at her boots and felt shy. But Emma wasn't shy, Harry used to be shy, though now he was bolder than her, apparently.

"Listen," he started and she looked up to his eyes again. When had they gotten so attractive? What had gone on with him in the last couple years? Other than the international superstardom she supposed, but he'd grown into himself, like expanded his skin and presence. He was cute, but all she could think was that the end of puberty was rarely so damn kind. His fingers even seemed attractive, long and slim and she was imagining him playing piano, but then the instrument was her body, and damn, she was in her head again. She could feel that her eyes widened comically. She knew her pupils were blown. When was the last time she'd gotten laid? Apparently too long if holding hands had her imagining unspeakable things and holding in moans.

He smirked then, she guessed he knew where she went then. "Listen," he leaned in close and she nodded, their noses brushed. He exhaled and her lips tingled. "Where are you staying?"

"Huh?" She wasn't sure what she'd expected him to say, but that wasn't it.

He giggled, and it was cute enough that Emma felt a splash of awareness hit her face. She looked around to see if anybody saw them flirting if she could disengage her gaze. "Are you at your parents?"

"Oh, um yeah?"

"Are you sure?" He laughed then and the brush of his thumb across the back of her hand was warmer than the mulled wine in her belly.

"No, I'm sure, just not sure why you are asking." She nudged him and realized a bit too late that her nipples touched him first, she was only half sorry this top meant no bra when she felt the friction.

It was his eyes' turn to widen. "Um," he exhaled and she missed his eyes when he quickly glanced down her dress like there might be a cookie there and then up quickly like he remembered he wasn't supposed to have any sweets. "Ok, um," he said after he visibly took hold of himself, "I was just hoping you had a room above the pub or something."

She knew her face called him idiot better than her mouth could.

He rolled his eyes, "I know, it was a shot in the dark!"

"Did you expect me to slide you my room key if I did?" Emma flashed her eyebrows like she wasn't imagining him finger fucking her with his piano hands a moment ago. "Isn't that your move?" She teased, kind of. She imagined he knew his way around hotel rooms, and women in them.

"Heeeey," he was being cute but the corners of his eyes dropped a moment and the green dulled. "It's not like that."

Emma scoffed.

"Well, I mean," his other hand found hers and now if anyone was watching them they were getting a show. "If it was like that, I wouldn't say no, but just want to hear about Holland, seems so amazing, and where you are in the summers..."

She could see him racking his brain.

"Iceland." They said together. And then giggled together too.

"You been keeping tabs on me?" She leaned forward and enjoyed the brush of him on her again. He shivered.

"Yeah, always admired you." He looked at her through his lashes. "I'd like to hear more reasons you're the most impressive person I've ever met."

"But I don't have a place." She reminded him.

"If I got one?"

"What?" She thought she knew what he was asking, but she wanted a minute to think about her answer, to quiet the resounding YES that echoed in her body and her mind. Because he might have said it wasn't like that, but they were chest to chest and had been holding hands since they kissed moments ago.

He looks down chagrined at his pigeon toes, before his gaze lit on their hands, then her face. "If I got a room at the Vicarage? Would you come with me? Really! We can really just talk." He assured and then the cocky boy who found his stride in hotel room assignations showed out, "if you want." Those dimples were deadly.

"Can it be the Boar's Head?" She knew she'd showed her cards, by asking for a room the town over.

He nodded and grinned like he'd just hit the hotpicks. "It can be the Boar's Head." He nodded like a dashboard bobble head. "I have to make nice here a bit longer, but I'll call now, and put your name on, so you can go when you're ready."

They'd been standing close for just a few more seconds when Gemma said- "Harry! Get off. God you are such a flirt!" But she was in her cups too, so they laughed it off.

The next hour, Emma stayed near Gem, but her eyes tracked Harry. Once, he came by and stole a sip of Gem's cocktail off her and Emma was glad her friend's ire distracted her, because Emma was watching him giggle like a fiend and the contraction of his throat. When their eyes met, she knew hers made a promise. One she wanted to keep.

So now she was alone in a couple of quaint rooms a town over, waiting to have sex with Gemma's little brother, Harry Styles.

She was torn, half of her wanted to open the bottle she'd swiped from the alcohol table at the party. The other half wanted to call an Uber and go back to her parents' house, where she should have stopped and grabbed some clothes so she wouldn't have to do the walk of shame.

But getting clothes would have meant forethought; she will deny that, especially to herself.

Emma had just opened the uber app and cursed their rural area when she heard a key in the lock.

Like a gun at the races.

They were never going to just talk. She'd just dropped her phone on the couch before Harry laid the first kiss on her.

The first kiss she planned to really remember, that is. Their mistletoe kiss had caught her off guard enough that she could only remember the feelings, not the details.

Yet, she was here, kissing him in a rented room after sneaking out of his mum's Christmas Eve party, on the strength of those feelings.

The kiss started strong and sweet, just like she takes her tea. He didn't taste like tea, he tasted like wine, Merlot maybe, but it could have been any red. And his tongue had this delicious slither to couple with its intoxicating flavor. She was in for a penny when she rode over here, but now there was no way she was going anywhere but to bed with him, no matter how pound foolish. He was nipping at her bottom lip and mouthing at her jaw before he sucked an almost mark into her collarbone and love bites onto the sides of her neck. He was just about to hit a particular sweet spot while working off her clothes, his hands were at her zipper. The cheeky boy, and she felt like they should at least hit pause even if stop was off the table.

"Harry," she moaned, or breathed, it was a sound she'd never made before.

"Hmmm?" He asked without stopping any of his forward momentum.

"I thought we were gonna talk." That one was like a laugh, there was a trill in her voice certainly.

"We'll talk afterwards." He said it like a statement, but looked to her for confirmation. At her nod, her skirt dropped and his hands were all over her bare ass above the stockings she'd worn to feel sexy but hadn't expected anyone to see. She normally would have worn tights. Thick ones, certainly, in Amsterdam. It would have been smarter here too. It was at least as cold. She'd been feeling that mix of confidence and self consciousness one gets when seeing people from your past when you think you've leveled up. She wanted to feel her best, look her best. Sexy, even if no one was interested. She's thankful, both for his interest and her unintended preparation. When he caught the sides of her knickers while her shirt and bra were as untouched as his clothes, she figured she needed to get with it. She'd been clutching his shoulders and his gorgeous hair instead of doing anything of use to their current pursuit.

Emma pulled at his shirt until it came over his messed up disheveled hair and laughed at the hodge podge of black ink haphazardly spread over his torso and one arm. "What's this then?" She said between licks of his tongue.

"After, we talk after!" He'd gotten her shirt unwrapped. She liked that detail of the shirt too, a sexy secret, like her matching bra. He pulled back to stare and was distracted long enough for her to give him another look over. He does look sexy in his decorated skin.

"What do they mean?" She liked things to make sense, her world was ordered, scientific.

Harry shrugged. "Lots of different things. Or nothing. Now can we please go to bed and we can discuss my stupid tattoos after I've had you."

"Oh fuck,'' was all she could say to that. He smirked and hoisted her up his hips to carry her through the open frame to the bedroom. He pulled her knickers free as soon as she was done bouncing.

She'd just about caught her breath when she saw him go for the button of his jeans. She lost it again when his thick bulge became visible and he pushed his tight jeans forcibly down his thighs. "Damn!" She looked at him with a glint.

He mounted the bed and spread her open, kissed her right knee over her stocking, which he seemed intent in keeping on, and looked pointedly at her center. She was swollen, his eye contact with the evidence didn't help. "Damn!" He echoed and she would have laughed but Harry, Gemma's sexy little brother, was kissing up her right thigh, with just a few licks and nips to her hip creases and so damn close to where she wanted him before he was testing the fuck out of her by kissing and licking and loving her left thigh. Ignoring her desperate need.

"Fuck, Harry. Please." She'd got the bedspread balled in her hands and she would normally have removed that before considering getting into the bed but she was also usually in pajamas and alone.

The filthy things he was saying were way worse than whatever could have been on the bedspread. Though she enjoyed them a great deal more, and it made her happy to have taken off everything already.

Harry had finally gotten to the main course. Only After her begging got loud enough to be heard by the room next door and the innkeeper, she won't make eye contact with anyone tomorrow. Maybe not even Harry, if he stayed. Emma had his full attention now, she could learn about all the things his mouth could do. The wet flat of his tongue caressed her like she was a bit of deliciousness and sunk down to find her creamy center.

"Fuck!" She yelped when he sealed his mouth over her for a tight suck and rub until she was rolling and writhing and fighting against the arms banded around her thighs. He laid one across her belly to hold her down.

"Do you like that?" He kept going because her answer was obviously yes. When the arm not restraining her passion made its piano fingered way between her thighs to do the thing she'd imagined earlier, sliding in tightly where she was wet and wanting, she clenched down on his three fingers and said his name.

He slid up her body and reached for the condom, but Emma had gotten her head back around to stop him before he got it on. She hated the taste of rubbers, and she'd like to know his flavor first. "Wait." She leaned forward between his legs and stroked him base to tip. He really was well favored, and not just from the neck up. She pressed his length to his stomach and licked the seam from his balls around and up to his head before she got a mouthful of him. Now he was her dessert. She didn't even think to try the pies and things at the party, she had been so preoccupied with the taste she'd had of him. It was but an appetizer for this. He leaked on her tongue and she moaned and hummed.

"Jesus! Emma! Stop, I'm gonna!" He pushed her back. And she was a little mad he'd taken away her sweetie. "Enough. I'd like to get inside you."

That was a suggestion she could take. So, she lay back and thought of anything but England while he stroked his skinned cock and spat over the tip. God. The way his stomach flexed caused an aftershock to recapture her. "Harry?" His name a plea. His knees hit the bed and her heels pressed him toward her, toward them.

"God, I've never seen you like this!" She'd have to ask him what he meant by that, later. Then he nodded, using his thumb to press his cock head inside the tight ring of muscle at the top of her entrance. Except he was a little low.

"Uhh!" She glanced down and grabbed him to redirect. "Wrong one." She tried not to laugh.

"Sorry, might be a touch too eager." He confessed: She's now laughing, openly. "Hey! It may have went right in, as wet as you are?"

Now she'd be indignant if he wasn't so ridiculous. "Are you really complaining about how wet my pussy is?"

"No, no, that would make me an idiot right?" He asked and found the right spot to start pushing in.

This was always her favorite part, and since this was her favorite fuck already, she knew the pop when he got the lip of his head in would be enough to begin her tip over the edge.

She moaned even before he caught the exact right angle to square her desire and she clutched his back and lifted her bottom to chase his withdrawal. "It would, god, you're perfect, an idiot."

"Oh God, Em!" She liked that. And the kisses to her mouth and chin and neck. Messy and wet and out of control. He'd gone from deliberate and self possessed to a man overcome as he rolled his hips up and into her and against that delicious place inside.

"Harry, don't stop. I'm close." Her head fell back when he slowed down just enough to draw out her orgasm, bring it to the surface and ride it home. He stroked her through and then brought his hands under her ass to lift her pelvis up to his driving thrusts, more deliberate and direct than the ones he used to get her off. She watched his face scrunch, and then open, his jaw down and his eyes closed until he smiled and licked his lips.

It's that face she decided she wanted to see as much as she could.

And she did, it was made better when he bit his lip and laughed. "Am I a perfect idiot then?"

She was blissed out and couldn't stop herself saying, "no you're an idiot with a perfect cock!" He was just pulling out of her then, and she was so embarrassed when he stood up to tie off the condom and preened.

"Am I now?"

She was the idiot. "I'll Pay you to forget I said that!" Emma wants to scurry to the bathroom and get out of here. She's already feeling shame, may as well get the walk over with.

"I don't need any money." He's laughing now. Shes scooting to the restroom when he catches her hands and holds her close. "Where are you going. You owe me, you're gonna pay me in conversation."

Wait, he still wants to talk, even after they've done what they came to do. "Ok." Shes still a little embarrassed and pulling away.

"No, no, stay and talk, come back to bed and tell me about my perfect co—" she's clamping her hand over his mouth.

"Only if you shut up, and I have to have a wee first."

"After!" He begged. "I wanna hear about school and everything. What exactly you're doing to save the world."

"I'll tell you, I have to go after, prevents uti's and such." She hated being clinical, well right now.

"It does?" He asked and she nodded. "That's good to know."

She wants to be embarrassed, but his ease when she comes back from washing up, the way he is still naked and opens his arms to her, helping her find the right spot on top of him where they are both comfortable, it makes her less self conscious, about her little factoid, her nudity, or that she's essentially slept with him right off.

She sighs and is about to ask about the giant butterfly, moth, when he speaks. "Tell me about Holland, about school." His voice is like molasses, and her words come out as slow.

"It lovely, and school is so hard, some times I might as well move onto campus, live in the library-"

"You don't live on campus?" She shakes her head. "Do you ride your bike into town?"

"Yes, I do."

"Oh, you must send me a picture of you on your bike. In a dress." He wants to text.

"Then I want updates on any stupid tattoos you get!" She counters.

"You think my tattoos are stupid?" He pouts, and she's captivated by that face.

"Very." She kissed both sparrows beaks. "But their also sexy."

He likes that, his dimples say so. Then he asks about Iceland and they talk for an hour or more before she's over him, swallowing his moans. They have another go in the morning before leaving, he's hard to convince that she'll be fine with an Uber. If he drives her, it'll blow their cover.

She wound up in his suv anyway.

For the next week they snuck out to warm up the backseat of his Range Rover, her mother's kitchen counter, his childhood bedroom, and then the inn again the night before she left. Just for a few hours, she'd told her mum she was going to the pub to say goodbye to mates.

Their goodbye meant his face remained her go-to for the next year whenever she was alone in her room, at night, missing him.

"Can I have you again, next year? For Christmas?" He'd asked.

Who could say no to that?

She faced those plans unafraid, the ones they made, for the whole next year.

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #tis the damn season #winter wonderland #chapter 2

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yuzukult · 4 years

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city lights || chanyeol & reader

title: city lights pairing: chanyeol x reader (ft. x junmyeon) genre: soulmate!au words: 8.2k prompt: i’ve waited for years to find my soulmate, but when i finally meet him, he’s completely different from what i expected him to be, and he doesn’t want to be with me. warnings: there’s no smut, but there may be some mature topics & cursing. note: i know that city lights is baekhyun’s album title, but i thought this title it fit this story well :).... also this is my first fic in a while so... hopefully this isn’t too bad... 5/9/20: i’ve reviewed for typos....... lets hope 5th time is the charm....

I’m twenty-two when I meet my soulmate.

Once you turn the ripe age of twenty-one, a unique tattoo appears on your body that replicates the one your soulmate has.

Everyone dreams about meeting their soulmate, falling in love, getting married, having kids and growing old together—but those aspirations are only attainable for the population that get to even meet “the one”. There are people who defy the odds and develop relationships with those who aren’t bounded as their mate, some successful and some not, but if you knew you had someone who was made for you out there, wouldn’t you want to find them as well?

This guy was attractive and he knew it. He would stride his tall frame into every room with confidence radiating from his body with a beaming smile plastered on his face. His laugh was the remedy to a bad day, and if his happiness were an infectious disease, it would be considered contagious. Just being in his proximity gifted you a fragment of his elation but it was enough to feel the major aftereffects. It didn’t feel fair that he was a whole package. Bubblegum pink wavy curls brushing his forehead, doe-like eyes and ears that his friends would make fun of for being big— but was a cute addition to his looks. There had to have been a switch on and off button on him somewhere, because he knew when to suddenly flip from a sweet, charming guy into this sexy man. There wasn’t anything wrong with him, but his mentality was to ‘fuck around’ as much as he could. He had the traits to swoon any girl, easily fishing them into his lap before stringing them along and dropping them in mere moments. It was easy anyway, these girls knew that he wasn’t their soulmate, but he was the closest they could get to one. Maybe he’d be the one they could change and make him fall in love with them, they’d all say.

But he was mine.

Well, at least, he’s supposed to be.

I met him through a mutual friend – well, more of a co-worker really. I lived in Busan for majority of my life, so moving to Seoul for work meant that I lost contact with a lot of my friends back home. Plus, the hours at the office were draining…

So when Minseok approached me at my desk on a Friday morning with a suspicious smile spread across his face, I leaned back on my swivel chair as he invites himself to sit on the pile of paperwork that lay across my workspace. He is always welcomed here, after all, he’s one out of the few friends I have here in the city.

“Yes? You want something from me?”

“Why do you say it like that?” His mischievous grin was now formed into a pout. “I don’t only come here when I need something from you. We’re friends, aren’t we?” Minseok was the opposite of what a stereotypical 29-year-old would look like – he’s cute, but baby cute. He’s got great features, with his bushy brows and well-sculpted face, but it was more of an “I want to squish his cheeks” kind of reaction he emitted from me. Either way, it didn’t stop the girls in my office from gushing over his looks, constantly trying to get his number.

I hum while twiddling with the pen between my fingers, pursing my lips in suit with his. “Maybe. But you’re definitely here because you need something from me. Cut to the chase—what’s up?”

“Okay, okay,” Minseok is admitting defeat now, slouching in his position as guilt washes over his face. “I noticed the music note on your arm. Is that your soulmate marking?”

“Oh,” I pull my sweater sleeve up just barely on my left arm, pushing my watch down just enough to see the tattoo. “Yeah, it’s a 16th note. I learned how to play the saxophone when I was younger, so I knew what it was when I saw it.”

“About that…” What’s wrong with him? Why does he keep pausing? “I think I know who your soulmate is.”

Minseok is the reason I find myself out-of-place at a club, seated at a bright red booth tucked in a corner that he claims is his friends’, and that I should hang around until I get a glimpse of this guy who he thinks is my soulmate. I’m pulling my blue jeans up that doesn’t quite fit right and opting for a black bodysuit with lace 3/4 sleeves. My hair is let loose with soft curls, one side tucked behind my ear. Honestly, I’m not here to look sexy at a club, but I wanted to look decent enough to meet someone who potentially was ‘the one’.

But this isn’t exactly where I found myself wanting to meet him.

I’m sitting next to a guy named Kyungsoo, or so he introduces himself as, and I hope that I get his name right because the volume of the speakers are so loud, I can barely hear myself think. It has me wondering if all of Minseok’s friends are just as attractive as he is, because Kyungsoo reeked of beauty. Dressed in all black – including the rims of his glasses were black – he was effortlessly gorgeous. He seemed equally as awkward as I am here, but it’s confirmed that he’s not my soulmate, and that he’s only here because it’s a friend of both his and Minseok’s birthday – another guy named Jongin… who also is not my soulmate.

“How old are you?” Kyungsoo is leaning over behind my ear, hoping that I can hear him. The veins on his neck are bulging from his attempt.

“Twenty-two,” I holler back.

“Oh wow, you’re very young.” He’s pushing his frames up from slipping on his nose before continuing. “Chanyeol is twenty-eight. I’m twenty-seven.”

“Chanyeol?”

“Minseok didn’t tell you his name?” Kyungsoo seems like a well-reserved guy, but his smile at the moment illuminates with impish. “If he’s right, your soulmate is Chanyeol. Tall guy, you won’t miss him.”

“Could you tell me more about him?” He shakes his head in response before using his chin to point over behind me toward a figure walking in the direction of the table.

That’s the first time I meet Chanyeol.

I remember my heart skipping a beat once my eyes laid on him, because almost immediately, I felt the sparks that the stories said there would be. There were always these posts on forums about how people met their soulmate – how everything around them seemed to change. The way they perceived color and taste were different because now it was enhanced and that they were on a high that couldn’t be described in any other way. Words didn’t do the emotions justice. It was just pure elation.

Even well renounced authors couldn’t even put to words what it felt like. Bliss, maybe? No, it was better than that.

Plus—it was troublesome to compare my experience with theirs when I’m inside a club where it’s dark and the lights are flashing and flickering.

His hair looked fluffy. I wanted to run my fingers through those luscious locks, and the shade of pink in his hair made him look more adorable than sexy, despite his outfit. Black leather jacket, with matching black jeans, and a white t-shirt were his get-up, and as he was approaching the table, his hands were stuffed into the front pockets of his pants before he changes his route and strides toward Jongin who stands by the booth. Jongin’s cheeks were already flushed on his bronzed skin when I first meet him entering in the club, but he’s more than happy to have a stranger join in on his party shenanigans. However, the change of emotions on his face expressed the evident adoration he had for the taller male, because moments later, he has his arms wrapped around him with laughter that could be heard throughout the club.

“Chanyeol!” Jongin exclaims, and my claimed-to-be soulmate ruffles the birthday boy’s hair with a smile on his face. My heart clenched at that moment and I swore for a second I had a heart attack. “Happy Birthday, Jongin. Party the night away, bro.”

He slides into the booth across from Kyungsoo and I, exchanging handshakes with the other male before offering one to me. He’s using his right hand to greet me, so I don’t get a glimpse of his supposedly tattooed wrist.

“I’m Chanyeol,” He says, and I take his hand with a firm grip, and I feel that spark between the two of us again. He must have felt the something too, because he abruptly escapes from the grasp with a soft chuckle. “Sorry, I might have shocked you. I rub my socks on carpets in my free time.” He jokes.

Kyungsoo introduces me as Minseok’s friend, and it’s like a light bulb goes off on top of Chanyeol’s head. “Ah, the soulmate. He’s really trying to get me to settle down, isn’t he?” His face looks like he’s going to play along, quickly locking eyes with Minseok in the crowd before gesturing the older male over.

“Hey, I see you’ve met my friend, your soulmate.” Minseok is grinning from ear to ear, and I can’t tell if it’s him playing around with his friend that’s bringing him the overwhelming excitement or the alcohol in his system.

“She has a name, hyung, and it’s not ‘your soulmate.’ I’m about to ask her if I can see her marking to compare, and since you’re so damn adamant about us meeting, I figured you should witness it yourself.”

“Okay, well shoot. Do it.” Minseok is looking at me as I slip off the watch on my wrist, dropping it on the table while Chanyeol tugs down the sleeve of his jacket before resting his arm beside my watch. I place my own next to his, and Minseok is already clapping in awe.

It’s a match.

“Fuck, what—fuck. What?” He’s grabbing my wrist now, moving out of his side of the booth before slipping in next to me, pushing me into Kyungsoo. Chanyeol’s in disbelief, and I can hear the snickering coming from the other side of me. “But I’m only twenty-eight!”

“Dude, you shouldn’t be at a bar on a Tuesday night trying to pick up girls at your age. This is a good thing.” Minseok is in Chanyeol’s previous seat now, and his face is glimmering with excitement. “You can finally chill out and stop acting like a college student.”

“This is a joke right?” He’s scoffing, dropping my hand in the process and I wince at the abrupt action because I hit my hand on the edge of the table. “This is a temporary tattoo or something, because there’s no way.”

“You’re twenty-eight, Chanyeol, did you think you were never going to meet your soulmate?” Kyungsoo chimes in, swirling the beer in the cup in his hand. “Jongin is already married, and he’s one of the babies in the group.” Jongin has a wife? He didn’t seem like it… but I guess don’t judge a book by its cover, right?

“I’m sorry,” Chanyeol’s standing now, looking down at me and I feel small. “I thought I would be lucky enough to not meet my soulmate. There are so many people who haven’t. Yeah, I’m not doing this. Sorry, you’re going to have to find someone else.” Before I could even let a word out of my mouth, he’s already lost in the crowd.

“Sorry about that,” Minseok looks like a sad kitten when he’s talking to me, pity spewing with each word that he says. “I honestly thought he was going to drop the act and actually try getting to know you.”

I want to say that it’s fine, but I’m not. Chanyeol only knew my name and that I was his soulmate, and in the matter of seconds, he concluded that he didn’t want this. My face is frozen, and I’m completely dumbfounded.

My soulmate doesn’t fucking want me. My soulmate, the person who was supposed to love me. The person I was supposed to love. I have waited twenty-two years to meet a man who ends up crafted as everything that I wasn’t, but was the person who was supposed to fit into me like a missing puzzle piece.

“Hey, are you okay?” Another guy – great, another one—comes to the table and he looks perturbed. “I’m sorry about Chanyeol, I was watching from the side because I thought I could witness him meeting his soulmate but it didn’t seem to turn out the way I assumed…” He’s distorted with worry, the same expression that’s drawn on both Minseok and Kyungsoo’s faces. “I can get you an Uber or something if you want to go home. I don’t think you’d want to stay here after that, right? Ah, I’m Junmyeon, by the way. Part of the group.”

“He’s the mom of the group if that makes you feel any better. He’s always the sober one, you’ll be safe with him.” Contrition clouds Minseok’s expression.

Junmyeon doesn’t look like a mom; in fact, he looks far from a mom. I don’t know where Minseok finds his friends because Junmyeon looks like a piece of artwork that belongs at a museum. He’s wearing two loose dress shirts layered that aren’t buttoned-up all the way, exposing a bit of his bare chest. It’s a questionable choice of fashion, I admit, but he makes it work.

I can’t even bring myself to speak, so I just nod. I type in my address into Junmyeon’s phone before he takes it away, tracking the driver. My soulmate doesn’t want me. That’s all I could think about.

“Don’t feel bad,” Kyungsoo interrupts my thoughts as he slides an unopened beer bottle toward my direction, implying that I should drink just a bit to forget my issues as Junmyeon is tracking the whereabouts of the driver. “Chanyeol… he likes to live his life differently. We only come to these places during special occasions—like Jongin’s birthday, or Minseok’s bachelor party. But Chanyeol… this is like a ritual for him to come every weekend.”

I take up on Kyungsoo’s offer and open myself the beer, taking a couple gulps before letting out a sigh. “It’s… It’s not fine, but I guess I will be fine. I want to try to convince him, so maybe I can meet him in a different place another time?” I suggest, and it seems that both Kyungsoo and Minseok like that idea because their faces brighten a bit.

I finish the beer coincidentally at the same time that Junmyeon tells me the Uber is here and that he’ll walk me out. We exchange numbers because he wants to make sure that I get home safe, and I comply – he’s attractive, the mom of the group, so I figured I could trust him.

But then we’re outside of the club, and I’m cold without a jacket, and I’m doubtful that I’m just exaggerating, but I feel like my heart was being pulled out of my chest, thrown onto the floor, and stomped on.

I didn’t mean to stare, and I probably have been standing here watching this whole thing unfold for about 5 minutes now. Chanyeol’s in the alleyway with some girl he probably just met, her back against the red brick wall where the streetlight barely brushes them but it’s like my senses were heighted to see the actions clearly. Her arms were wrapped around his neck, and although his head was tilted in my direction, attempting to hide the explicit actions between the two, any idiot would know what they were doing.

It hurt. My chest was in so much pain, twisting and turning like someone’s grasp was on it, but before it could get any worse, Junmyeon steps in front of me, pulling me into his arms. “Why are you watching? Don’t you know it physically hurts when you see your soulmate do… things like that with someone else?” I’m muttering ‘no’ in his shirt, and I feel the fabric hanging on him was damp – oh. It was because of me. I was crying. I didn’t know who Chanyeol was until today yet he has me bursting with tears in the arms of a stranger.

Chanyeol doesn’t even know me, and he’s already dismissed me from his life. He doesn’t know what my favorite color is, what I enjoy in my pastime, what my most watched show is, and what foods I enjoy. He doesn’t know my personality, what makes me as a person, my biggest fears, my dreams and aspirations but just one look, he knew he didn’t want me anymore.

He pulls away from the woman when he hears footsteps descending in the background, and sees that it’s me with Junmyeon walking away from the scene. What I later learned was that in that brief moment, he felt a stinging pain in his chest too.

After texting Junmyeon that night that I got home safely and reassuring that I was going to be okay (eventually, at least), we exchanged texts daily. I learned a lot about him, like how he enjoyed composing music in his spare time, which I found out later that Chanyeol does the same thing, except as a profession. I don’t tell him that I had known this about Chanyeol because of a previous dream. He works in a stereotypical office setting, something about trade management, but he claims that it’s just a job that pays the bills, and his passions are elsewhere.

We don’t meet, but we text frequently. I also see Minseok everyday at work, and he treats me as he did before, which I appreciate because it’s distasteful to talk about the circumstances of Jongin’s birthday party.

“What are you doing this weekend?” Minseok again is inviting himself to the little office space I have that is bombarded with rolls of architectural drawings and stacks of paperwork that needed reviewing. He skims through the documents that splatter, but he has absolutely no clue what he’s looking at for someone being in the financial department.

“Uh, probably catching up on work,” That question always strung along with a proposal to hang out, and I had prepared an excuse why I didn’t want – I mean, couldn’t go.

“My friends and I are going to the beach. We have a whole beach house that we rented out for the entire weekend, and seeing that you’re clicking well with Junmyeon, I think you should come along. Plus, you get to meet my soulmate!”

“Hayoung, right?”

“Yes, Hayoung. I think you’d like her; she has the same tolerance for spicy food like you do. And... It’s been months since you’ve actually hung out with me on a weekend.” He’s talking about the incident and I feel something churning in the pit of my stomach. But, he’s right. I don’t have any friends here, and I would have Junmyeon to hang out with when Minseok is occupied.

“Mm, alright fine, but just this once. No more funny business like last time right?”

His face falls into a frown, and he’s still remorseful about the fated night, but I’ve told him multiple times that he’s all forgiven, and it wasn’t his fault for what occurred.

It’s been almost 6 months since I last saw Chanyeol. I note this because the seasons have changed, and the harsh, brisk wind that slaps my face in the days aren’t present, but replaced with the blistering heat of the sun that June brings.

I chose to drive myself to the location that Minseok sends me instead of carpooling… just in case I needed to quickly escape any distressing social situations.

The house is seemly huge—there looks like there could be 10 rooms (eventually I find out that there isn’t even enough for all of us), and it’s by the water with multiple cars parked out in the front of it, which I can only assume, belong to Minseok’s friends. The roof shingles are blue with accents throughout the home that match the sea, seashells and decor splattered across the surfaces. I park my old, beat up Lexus sedan that belonged to my grandfather previously behind one of vehicles, and I’m surprised that I even make it here in one piece.

The salty ocean aroma fills the air and it mixes in with the charcoal burning from the backyard as I enter into the threshold of the home. I drag my duffle bag beside me, dropping it by the other suitcases and backpacks that sit in the living room of the home before making my way back to where everyone was grouped outside.

There are a couple new people that I haven’t seen before (who supposedly were at the club) since the last encounter with Minseok’s friends when I get to the back porch – Jongdae, Baekhyun, Sehun, and Yixing are their names. Hayoung is helping Minseok carry in additional groceries from the car, but she still says her greetings as she’s carrying one side of a cooler. A woman is standing beside Jongdae, who I believe is his wife, gifts him a peck on his cheek before briskly walking by me with a baby resting on her shoulder, whispering a quick ‘hello!’ to me before going into the house to set the little one down. Kyungsoo is manning the grill before I even arrive, and he’s gesturing me to come over with his cooking tongs to help him out. Junmyeon is standing beside him with a knife in his hand, and he looks lost after Kyungsoo gives him direction.

“Come help, hyung is useless,” He hisses, glaring at the older male through his glasses.

“I’m sorry,” Junmyeon is pouting playfully before he places down the knife. “I’m trying!”

“Sure, sure,” I find myself mimicking the tender smile Junmyeon has on his face when he locks his eyes with mine. “I’ll replace Junmyeon here.”

There are bell peppers, onions, and pre-cut cubed of beef lying by the grill beside the naked skewers sticks. I chop the vegetables before guiding Junmyeon to replicate my actions, sliding the pieces onto the stick before Kyungsoo cooks it.

“Do you know how to cook?” Junmyeon asks, but his eyes don’t leave his hands because he’s too preoccupied with his work.

“A bit, I live alone, so I kind of have to.”

“Ah, I live with Kyungsoo and Chanyeol so… Kyungsoo pretty much cooks every night.” I see from my peripheral vision that Kyungsoo has a proud grin on his face as he’s flipping the skewers on the grill. “So much for being their hyung and taking care of them, right? Chanyeol and I can’t even cook rice, we just get the instant ones when Soo isn’t around.”

“That’s nice though,” I stuff a piece of cubed beef to complete his skewer stick before trading it with my empty one. “You never have to cook. I always have to find new recipes because I get bored of the food I make.”

“Maybe you can teach me sometime. Learn new recipes and teach a beginner.” He’s gleaming with happiness, which can only be from the fact that the people surround him are the ones he loves the most. We’ve become friends over time, in spite of the fact that we haven’t met in person since Jongin’s birthday.

“Sure, I’d be more than happy to.”

“In exchange, I’ll bring the groceries. That’s my payment to you for being my teacher,” He winks, and my cheeks grow pink. There’s a slight possibility that Junmyeon is growing on me, and I might have a crush on him.

“I thought you weren’t coming,” I heard a voice from behind me, and I know it belongs to Chanyeol because I get chills down my spine. I’m filling up my cup from the tap with water while leaning against the kitchen sink.

“Minseok suggested that I come.”

“These places aren’t really your thing though, you’d rather be at home working.” Chanyeol is opening the fridge, grabbing himself a beer can. He opens it and brings the cold beverage to his lips, my eyes wandering to his neck as his adam’s apple bobs as he drinks, but I pause and refrain myself from letting my imagination run wild. Either way, I’m left questioning how he would know what my preferences are.

“How would you know? We don’t even talk.”

“I’m your soulmate, I know everything about you.” He wipes his upper lip with his sleeve, and there’s something erotic about it. I quickly shake my head again from these inappropriate thoughts and furrow my brows in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“You haven’t gotten the dreams yet?” He pushes the can toward my direction, gesturing that I take a sip and I decline.

“No… what dreams are you talking about?” I’m not playing dumb, I really didn’t know what he was talking about, but his expression conveyed otherwise.

“All my dreams are of you, and you’re never doing anything interesting in it. I saw you visit your family a couple times, maybe had some dinners or lunches with friends back in Busan, but nothing else. Do you have any hobbies?”

No, but I wasn’t going to tell him that.

“Well, if you’re fucking around all the time, it’s not going to show up in her dreams, you idiot.” Another voice enters in the conversation and room. It’s Hayoung coming in with Jongdae’s wife, who I still haven’t learned the name of, but I’m a bit embarrassed to ask her.

“Dreams?” I’m still perplexed by the situation, because if I’m being honest, I don’t quite understand this whole ‘soulmate’ thing other than you’re meant to be with them. I’ve never met anyone in the same situation as me, so I never learned the side effects of the rejection.

“You get dreams about your soulmate if you meet and choose to not be together. It’s a punishment, but it’s not brutal, so it’s not going to show you a scene of him hooking up with someone else. It’ll just make you regret.” Jongdae’s wife is talking now, shoving Chanyeol away from the fridge to grab the carton of milk to fill up the small bottles she has lined up on the counter.

Chanyeol chuckles at the comment, taking another sip of his beer. “So, I should regret not sitting by her while she’s working on some project? What are you even building by the way? Pipes?”

“It’s a mechanical system of a building,” I utter, and I’m dissatisfied immediately at my own response. Why would I even tell him that? Why would he even care? It makes me sound even more boring than I already am.

“Ah, there it goes. Another reason why I’m not feeling that regret you’re talking about.”

Hayoung is shaking her head in disapproval, arms crossed against her chest as she watches Jongdae’s wife finishing up the bottles of milk for the baby. “Maybe not right now, but it’ll build up. Before you know it, you’re going to be the one wishing that’s it’s you holding up the light instead of a lamp above her work just so you could do something to be next to her.”

When Chanyeol is with his friends, the best qualities of him come out when they’re around. He might be avoiding the real version of himself when he’s with me, but I get a glimpse into his world when I’m at these outings that Minseok and Junmyeon insist that I attend.

Chanyeol is playing the “attendance” game with the guys, and his competitiveness brings out a different side of him, but he’s determined to win, even if the prize is just being able to slap the loser on the back.

Baekhyun loses—again, and they’re all crowded around, not even taking turns, but in unison smacking his back as he grimaces in pain.

And when we’re out at the beach, sinking our toes into the sand and absorbing in the warmth of the sun, he makes a game out of out nowhere to play with his friends, laughter filling the air. He’s not laughing with me, but I still find myself feeling whole at the sound.

I’ve come to realize how easy it is for someone to fall in love with Chanyeol. He cared for no one more than his friends and family, and I start to see this when he’s talking fondly about his older sister and her kids when he sees Jongdae’s baby. His expression resembled child-like wonder when he’s playing with the girl, and it makes me ponder what he’d be like as a father—ah fuck, scratch that. He said doesn’t want to be with me.

There are moments where I’m convinced that I’ve gone insane, because when I’m eating a burger at the dinner table, he reaches out with a napkin in his hand to wipe the smear of ketchup off my cheek. Or the time when they ran out of water bottles at the beach and it was scorching hot, and he drinks a bit from his bottle before giving me the rest because I didn’t have one. Not quite sure what brings him to be so affectionate, so it feels odd.

The weekend sooner or later reaches to an end, and I had to resume back to work.

I’m attacked from behind at the office with more tasks than ever. It feels like there are at least 5 more folders that are added to the stack daily, and the mountains of paperwork overwhelm me. Minseok visits from time to time, dropping off snacks majority of the time because I don’t take up on his offers to have lunch together simply due to the fact that I didn’t have any time.

Despite all of that, Junmyeon still makes the effort to see me. He comes by several times a week, and just as promised, he’s providing the groceries and I’m teaching him how to cook. He entertains and keeps me company in my quiet apartment, but continues to be a wonderful distraction to the stress that I receive from work.

We’re cooking kimchi jjigae, and albeit that we both have aprons on, I still manage to get some on my t-shirt. I grumble in repulsion of how I could be so unladylike in front of a guy I’m trying to impress.

“It’s okay,” He comforts, and that signature smile makes an appearance yet again tonight. “It’s cute, it’s the style now.”

“What? Kimchi splatter?” I’m stirring the beef at the bottom of the pot, motioning him to monitor my actions. “You should let the meat cook, occasionally moving it around so it doesn’t burn. Cut the onions and mushrooms in the meantime.”

He abides by instruction, making his way to the cutting board and begins to chop the vegetables ardently. “You look good in anything, even kimchi splatter.” I let out a laugh of disbelief in return, but his expression proved that his compliment was authentic.

Everything about Junmyeon is art. His laugh is like the melody to your favorite song, and his smile shone brighter than the sunlight that peeks through the curtains of a Sunday morning. Listening to him speak about his aspirations, his interests in artwork, and his times with his friends remind me of a character in the novel that only spewed out perfections without a single flaw in their body. Junmyeon was selfless, elegant, and intelligent. A whole package, as someone would say, but a completely different package from Chanyeol.

So when Junmyeon confesses that he might have some feelings for me, I don’t hesitate in telling him that I might feel something for him in return.

“Listen,” He begins, tapping his fingers against the lid of his iced Americano anxiously. We’re sitting in a coffee shop on a Thursday, after having lunch together at a ramen place he suggests. “This is a bit different from how I would normally date. You actually met your soulmate, you know who he is.”

“But he doesn’t want me,” I interject, and I don’t want him to continue with more reasons as to why we shouldn’t be together. “He doesn’t want me so it makes the decision not to be with him easier. I’m ready to move on, Junmyeon. At least let me try to do that with you.”

The expression on his face suggests how uneasy he’s feeling, and he’s hesitating before speaking again. “I… we can try, but I really don’t want to put a label on this yet. Let’s date, hangout, and see how it goes, okay? I don’t want to get hurt.”

I agree to his terms. I understand why he’s feeling that way; it’s even harder when my soulmate is one of his best friends.

He takes me out on dates, mostly to museums to show me his favorite artworks and his personal interpretation of the pieces. Junmyeon is passionate about things like this, and hearing his thoughts and views had become my favorite pastime. He asks me what my interests are, and I’m a bit flustered because my work is my passion. I wasn’t sure how else to show him, so I take him to the Gangnam District one night, and he’s confused.

“Why did you pick here specifically?” It’s a cold night, and he’s wearing a black turtleneck with khakis, and a light brown trench coat with matching dark backpack that’s slung over his shoulder.

“You know what Minseok does for a living, right?” He hums in thought at my question for a moment before responding.

“He said he works in the financial department of an architecture firm. Am I right?”

“Correct, but do you have any idea of what I do?” Junmyeon pauses for a moment, and he raises a brow.

“Honestly, now that I think of it, I kind of always assumed you did the same thing. But I don’t quite think numbers were your passion,” He chuckles.

“Nope,” I click my tongue, jokingly disappointed as we’re walking down the streets, the lights illuminating from the buildings surrounding us but we don’t see stars in the sky in a city like this. “I’m an architect. I design buildings. I haven’t gotten the chance to design a building myself, just systems within it, but one day, I’d like to change the Seoul skyline. Create something of my own, build something bigger than me. I know you specifically like the works of artists that focuses more on the nature of things, but… something about the city is beautiful to me.”

Junmyeon is watching me as I spill my thoughts, and I physically feel the love radiating from him. Maybe I can learn to love him too.

At this same moment, I later find out that Chanyeol is dreaming of my date with Junmyeon, and his heart aches. He suddenly wishes that he were the one listening to my passions, and holding my hand while he shares his own.

I’ve been meeting Junmyeon weekly now, so frequently that he even has the passcode to my apartment. In addition, he’s been great at occupying my thoughts from these dreams I’ve been having. Almost every night, these scenarios of a typical relationship with Chanyeol would appear—doing laundry, cooking, movie dates… there was even a sex dream. It made me a little uncomfortable waking up from that nap, because my head was rested on Junmyeon’s shoulder on the couch. I must have fallen asleep in the midst of the movie.

“Finally awake? If I knew documentaries weren’t your thing, I wouldn’t have forced you to watch it.” He has a Cheshire’s grin that spreads from ear to ear and a chuckle the escapes from his lips. “Sorry, work has just been exhausting lately. I haven’t been getting much sleep.” I concede, and a bit guilty for sleeping through the movie but also dreaming about another man right next to him. Regardless, he’s interlocking our fingers together at this point, giving me a forgiving gaze.

“Don’t worry, I like having you next to me.” His words melt my heart, and I hate that I’m comparing him to Chanyeol because it’s not the same way that Chanyeol makes me feel.

Work had been exhausting, but not exhausting enough to find myself standing outside of a flower shop, beside Chanyeol who is equally as bewildered as I am. I couldn’t remember how I got there, uncertain how Chanyeol did either, and how long we’ve been standing here.

“I—did we agree to meet here or something?” He questions. Chanyeol looks different. His hair isn’t pink anymore, but it’s a dirty blonde. It didn’t matter what shade his hair was, what outfit he wore, he just pulled off any look he wanted effortlessly. He’s dressed casually, probably coming from the recording studio.

“I… I’m not sure.” I’m scratching my head, looking at the reflection of myself in the shop’s window before I realize how I look. My hair is greasy, tied up in a messy bun, and I’m wearing a t-shirt that’s stained with kimchi that splattered on me from my cooking lessons with Junmyeon whilst in the baggiest sweatpants. I was working from home that week because my new project didn’t have an office space set up for me yet, so I took advantage of the opportunity to dress like a bum in the comfort of my home. But… I’m not home; I’m very much out in public with Chanyeol.

He shrugs off the bizareness of the situation before facing me completely. “Anyway, since I have you here, can you stop having those moments with hyung?”

“What?”

“I keep seeing your dates with him every time I sleep. I see when you hold hands, when you sleep together—I see everything. I thought that these dreams weren’t supposed to be brutal.”

“How am I supposed to control that?” I feel my neck getting hot, and I’m furious with his words, but I don’t want him to have that leverage over me.

“I don’t know, just stop or something.” He dismisses me before walking away toward the opposite direction.

This happens a couple more times, and there’s no real explanation for it. I can’t manipulate my dreams and it becomes difficult to distinguish what’s a dream and reality anymore.

There’s a knock on my door but I’m too tired to get up.

It’s been 3 days since Junmyeon left on his business trip, and with my luck, I got sick the day after he departed. It’s probably due to the rainstorm that hit the other day, and I forget my umbrella at the office so I’m drenched by the time I’m home. I’m now alone in my small apartment, trying to convince myself I’m okay by occasionally heating up the leftover delivery of Soondubu I ordered a couple days prior. However, I’m currently prioritizing slumber.

The knock gets louder. The person is adamant about getting my attention; if it was a telemarketer, they would’ve left already. I grab my phone that lies right beside my face to see if there’s any new missed phone call notifications—none. If it were one of my friends, they’d call after the first attempt right?

Then I hear the beeping from the keypad on the door. Someone’s pressing in the passcode into my apartment. The lock dings in confirmation and clicks—whomever it is… they’ve successfully gotten into my apartment. Is this when I die?

“Dude, where are you?” The door shuts behind the footsteps, and it’s a familiar deep baritone voice that calls out for me, but I’m glued to the mattress, wrapped in my blankets like a burrito. He’s just going to have to kill me like this. I’m probably the easiest victim this killer is ever going to encounter.

There’s a tall figure that reaches to my bed, and despite my horrible eyesight, I squint enough to make out the features of his face. He has a facemask on, but it’s tucked below his chin, and he has a beanie on that matches his hoodie’s shade of grey. It’s Chanyeol. Am I dreaming? Is this another one of those hallucinations?

He kneels down beside me, utilizing the back of his hand to test the temperature of my forehead, then wipes the sweat off it with his fingers which feel like ice against my skin. I could almost hear myself sizzle from the impact. “Where’s Junmyeon? He called me saying that you haven’t responded to any of his texts. He can’t call for some reason. He’s worried.”

“Oh, away. I saw he texted earlier. I must have drift off midway through typing.”

Chanyeol sighs, clicking his tongue before getting up from the bed and snatching my phone from my side. “Password? It’s not going to recognize your face when you’re looking like that.” Ouch. “1616,” I respond before shuffling back into hiding position within my blankets. Maybe my cheeks are flushed from the fact that my passcode is 1616, like the 16th note on our wrists—but I’m going to blame it on the fever. I’m hot yet cold at the same time, and I can’t even gather the energy to argue with him about my appearance right now.

“Hey,” He’s talking to someone on the other line as he paces around the room with a hand on his hip and brows furrowed in slight frustration. “She’s home, she’s been sick. Not sure how long, but she’s looking like a wreck.” Chanyeol lets out a sigh, tapping his feet against the hardwood floors of my room, and it occurs to me that he’s never been in my house before. It’s also been a while since I’ve cleaned.

He’s tightening his lips into a straight line as he listens to who I assume is Junmyeon on the other line. “It’s fine hyung, you don’t need to come back. Just finish your work there; I’ll get Minseok to come check in every once in a while. I’ll give you another call before I leave.”

After hanging up, he diverts his attention back to me before letting out another exasperated sigh. “Did you eat anything yet? Take any medicine?”

“No,” I mutter under my breath. Honestly, I wasn’t in the mood to talk, and his attitude wasn’t convincing me to try to uphold the conversation either. “It’s not time for me to get up yet.”

“It’s already 1pm, what do you mean you’re not ready to get up yet?” He’s in the process of taking off his facemask and beanie now, throwing it on the chair by my desk before rolling up his sleeves and making his way out the room. He’s gone for what feels like eternity because my eyelids are slowly drooping shut when I hear his loud steps coming from the hall with a bucket in one hand, and a towel in another.

“I’m going to clean you up,” He announces, placing the bucket on the nightstand by my bed. “I bet you haven’t showered in days, and I can already tell you reek.”

“You can tell or smell?” That’s all the comebacks I can get out of me, because Chanyeol is already inviting himself to pull the covers off my weak frame tugging on the hem of my hoodie, gesturing me to take it off. “Let me wipe you down.”

“I’m not stripping in front of you, Chanyeol.” I may be on the last portion of my human battery level, but I’m not stupid. “I’m naked under this. I don’t have a bra on.”

“Okay, but I’m your soulmate. I’ve seen you naked countless of times in my dreams. So please, take it off so I can clean you up.” So… he has seen me naked too? Does he have those sex dreams too? Should I be working to get abs if he’s dreaming about how I look under this too? Because in comparison to him—

My thoughts are interrupted when he helps himself by pulling the hoodie off my body instead of waiting for my response. I don’t even have the chance to feel insecure when he begins wiping my arms and underneath with the wet rag. I know the water is warm, but my body temperature is too hot to be able to tell the difference. It’s silent when he does this, and when he’s done with the upper half of my body, he dresses me before tugging on my pants gently. “I’m going to do your lower half now.”

I must have fallen asleep briefly from his delicate touches because once my eyes flutter open, he’s already done and my sweats are on. I couldn’t even remember being embarrassed of him seeing my bare body, because he’s already tucking me back under the covers, checking my body heat once again with the back of his hand before throwing the rag back into the bucket.

He’s leaving the room and I still can’t translate the expression on his face. I thought that meeting your soulmate was supposed to make things easier, not harder.

I think I doze off yet again, because this time when I’m stirring awake and Chanyeol is sitting in a chair beside my bed with a tray full of things. There’s a mug, medicine, and a bowl in front of him, and this is where I get to finally see his features a lot more clearly.

His hair is brown now—I’m unsure when he dyed it, but makes him look tamed compared to how he actually is. The black circles under his eyes were like a trophy to his exhaustion, probably from the endless cycles of staying up all night, working on his composition pieces at the recording studio. I haven’t talked to him much, but my dreams update me with what he was up to, more than he would ever tell me.

“Here,” He’s holding a couple of pills in his palm with a cup of water in the other hand. “Take this, and eat some of the soup I made you. You need to actually have something in your system to feel better.” I feel like a 7-year-old child being lectured by her father, but to be fair… I’m acting like one. For once, I decide not to start a fight and comply, taking the pills into my mouth and drinking from the glass he’s holding before handing it back. The size of it makes it tough to swallow, and I can feel it sitting in my throat.

“Open.” His face is making it hard to read any of his emotions, but he has the spoonful of what I assume is chicken soup near my face, I stare at him for a moment before opening my mouth questioningly as he feeds me. If he’s poisoning me right now, I think I’d be okay with it because the soup surprisingly tastes delicious.

Honestly… after meeting Chanyeol, I never thought I could possibly even imagine this scenario. He’s actually… feeding me. He’s taking care of me while I’m sick. His face is distorted from the worry he has for me, but there’s hints of anger because I obviously couldn’t manage myself. I let him look after me while my thoughts run in circles, thinking what if Junmyeon had been here. I would’ve never been able to see Chanyeol in this light.

How many times have I fallen asleep with him here?

I feel something heavy on my midriff, and a warm body pressed from behind that has me turning around curiously to face the suspect, only to bump noses with the one and only—Chanyeol. Nose scrunched up from the impact, he has his one arm wrapped around me, my head resting on the other, and his body spooning my own. He looks peaceful like this, quiet – not a word coming from his mouth that strings along insults toward me, and his brows aren’t wrinkled in frustration like it always is when he’s looking at me. His mouth is slightly agape, and I can’t help but stare at his plump lips. My heart is fluttering just at the sight of him, stomach boiling from anxiety that it reminds me of my encounters with my first crush in middle school. He spent the whole day taking care of me, and he’s probably exhausted, knocking out right next to me, potentially infected with this fever I have.

I despise myself being in this position. I should tell him to move – I’m trying to convince Junmyeon that I didn’t have feelings for Chanyeol, and Chanyeol didn’t feel anything for me either, despite being soulmates, but right now… I like the feeling of being in his arms, I like that I can feel his chest moving against my back with his soft patterned breathing, and I like that he’s snuggling in just to feel closer to me.

Chanyeol is stirred awake, shuffling in his position as he rubs his face with the arm that once draped over me. I quickly turn myself back to face away from him and pretended to sleep before I feel his nose nuzzling into the crook of my neck as he hums quietly, and I’m not sure if he recognizes I’m awake or not with this action.

He’s muttering against my skin, and I’m unable to tell the difference between the warmth of his breath as he speaks, or if it’s my fever acting up again. “Is it too late to tell you that I want you to be mine? Am I the first person to lose their soulmate by making the mistake of telling her I didn’t want to be with her?” Chanyeol pauses for a moment, before he takes in a deep breath. “I care about hyung, and I know he’s developing feelings for you… but I really want to steal you away. I think I’m in love with you.”

Okay—I’m steaming hot. I can feel my face and ears flushing crimson, and I can’t say anything because I’m supposed to be sleeping, and I wouldn’t even know how to respond anyway.

I felt his lips pressed against my neck, and chills go down my spine before he releases me from his hold, getting up from the bed before making his way out of the room and possibly into the kitchen. I’m kicking off the sheets from my body, sitting against the bed frame, and my heart is beating so fast and hard that I can��t keep up.

This is everything I asked for. Just to be with my soulmate – but then Junmyeon is running laps through my mind every time I get closer to Chanyeol, and vice versa. Before today, I was okay with knowing that Junmyeon might be it, he might be my end game and although we weren’t bounded together, his feelings for me were genuine… plus not everyone ends up with their soulmate, right?

“I’m the stars, and you’re the city. You can’t see the stars in the city because of all the lights surrounding it, and I’ve already come to terms that Chanyeol is that light for you. I know that you’re going to try to convince me otherwise, but it’s a natural instinct for you to go to him, and it’s okay.” Poetic, even when he’s breaking my heart.

Junmyeon is leaning on the railing that perimeters the Han River, hair tucked in his black beanie that contrasts with his primary multi-color Northface jacket that compliments him so well. His cheeks are tinted pink from the crisp winter air and it reminds me that another year has passed since I’ve met him.

“I’m happy that I got to be with you, even if it was just for a moment. But I knew that I didn’t have you completely; there was still a part of you that resided with Chanyeol.”

“Please don’t do this,” I blurted. “I don’t understand why you’re doing this if you’re happy with me.”

He turns to face me, and his lips tug into an apologetic smile. His hands are rested on my shoulders in reassurance, knowing that this isn’t something he wants to do, but Junmyeon is altruistic. This is something Chanyeol needs, and he’d do anything to make his friend happy. It’s who Junmyeon is, and I can’t help but admire him for it.

“He’ll be here for you this time. He learned from his mistakes, and he’s willing to try. Why don’t you give him a chance?”

“He didn’t give me a chance when we met.” Tears are brimming in my eyes because the one person I thought wasn’t going to go is leaving me. “I thought you said you were going to stay.”

“I’m not going anywhere.” His thumb is pressed against my cheek, swiping away the stream coming from my eyes. “But Chanyeol is made for you. You’re never going to be able to love me like him. Your dreams are eventually going to take over, and whenever you see him with someone else, and when he sees me with you, it’s going to hurt the both of you physically.”

“We don’t have to see him—“

“You know I can’t do that. He’s like a brother to me.” He bites his bottom lip for a brief moment in thought before what it feels like forever, he speaks again. “When I left that week, I felt uneasy asking him to come check in on you. I knew that he wasn’t going to be able to hold back. He told me that after spending some time with you, despite the fact he’s met up with all these girls that only made him feel empty inside, he finally felt whole seeing you. He didn’t want to be with you because he wanted to option to choose you, he didn’t want someone, or something like fate to decide for him.”

I’m left without words, and I turn my head because it’s proven difficult to gather the courage to look at his face.

“I need you to be strong, and let me go. You won’t be as happy with me as you are with him. It’s how the universe works, love.”

I’ve been crying for days, and Junmyeon still hasn’t responded to any of my texts or calls. Eyes swollen that my face has become indistinguishable, my phone’s facial recognition just tells me to punch in the code now. I couldn’t even bring myself to leave my apartment anymore, so I’ve taken personal days off from work – I usually never did this since my emotions never truly got to the best of me, but it might have been the heartbreak and the constant overworking that finally broke me down.

I’m wrapped in my blanket once again, this time I’m not sick with a fever, but diagnosed with a broken heart. Bob’s Burgers is playing on the television screen in front of me; the show that once easily brought me light laughter from the stupidity of the jokes, suddenly doesn’t. I feel numb.

There’s a knock at the door, and there’s nothing in me that wants to get up to see the unwelcomed visitor, but my legs beat my thoughts to it because I’m already opening the door.

“Sorry, I know I’m probably the last person you want to see.” Bags of groceries occupy his hands, and he lifts an arm up to show. Chanyeol is wearing a baseball cap, a black t-shirt that hangs loose from his body and blue jeans. How’s he still so handsome like this? Wait. No, I’m pissed at him. “Let me at least take care of you while you’re grieving.”

“I’m grieving because of you,” I spat. “If you just agreed to be with me in the first place, I wouldn’t have been with Junmyeon, and we could have been fine. If you just continued to fuck around, Junmyeon would’ve just stayed. You had to tell him that you wanted this?”

“You know he wouldn’t have stayed if he knew you felt something for me.” And for the first time, I agreed with him. I have been shoving my emotions down my throat, refraining myself from being completely honest with Junmyeon because the dreams had been eating me up inside. I was running out of energy, day by day, because I was denying the possibility of there being a Chanyeol and I, and I was being punished for it.

I remained quiet before stepping aside, letting him into my apartment.

He makes his way into the kitchen from being familiar with the layout the last time he’s been here. Sitting back in the living room to resume my show, I peek over occasionally to watch. He had ingredients to make pasta, and his face is scrunched in diligence. We didn’t exchange words, we didn’t argue but continued to enjoyed the company of each other after that.

The silence ultimately shatters when Nam Joohyuk is standing naked in a scene of ‘the Bride of Habaek’ because Chanyeol bursts into laughter. From that moment on, my apartment felt livelier with him in it.

These nights eventually became recurrent. His clothes residing in a designated drawer in my dresser and space is made in my closet that has his name invisibly written over it.

Slowly, I’ve noticed that I’m not as tired as I was before. I felt refreshed, and skeptical that it’s because of Chanyeol’s evident presence that’s more frequent. After a while, I’m starting to believe that the debilitation between the two of us was due to the lack of each other’s company.

We schedule a dinner date at my place at 7, but he calls then tells me that he’s going to be leaving the studio late, and the instant a dubious sensation agitates my stomach, he’s at my house at 11 with soft pink tulips in his hand that reminds me back to when his hair was bubblegum.

“I’m late,” He states the obvious, but he’s bouncing on the tips of his toes anxiously as he observes the look on my face. “But I made Baekhyun run out to grab these for you while I was stuck. Forgive me?”

I think that moment was when I began to forgive Chanyeol for letting me go in the beginning.

Months later, I’m coming back from another rough day at work, tapping my fingertips on the keypad into my apartment before the door flings open just a moment before I’ve finished typing. “Oh?”

There he is, standing before me with a smile that’s brighter than the sun and warms me like not just any Sunday morning, but every morning. The chuckle that escapes from his lips at my startled expression isn’t like the melody to my favorite song, but becomes my favorite song. His voice when he says my name is as smooth and sweet as honey, deep enough to bring goosebumps to my skin.

“Happy birthday,” Chanyeol sings, pulling me into his embrace, my face is deep into his chest from the height difference. I’ve never felt more home than in his arms.

Between now and when I finally agreed to be with him, Chanyeol had completely turned around. We live together now, but other of that, we were taking the relationship slow. He was proving himself worthy, taking place of what used to be Junmyeon’s shoes and attempting his best to fill them, bringing us out on weekly dates, attentively listening to my opinion on shows, cooking with me at night, and even sharing his prized works with me. He says that his music used to reflect on the “me-shaped” hole in his heart, but he felt whole now, and I was the muse to the happiness in his pieces. A bit cringey, I admit—but it was his way of showing his love, and I liked that. He wasn’t usually like this.

“Everyone is already inside, hurry in.” His hands wrap around my wrist, where my marking appeared to glow these days, tugging me into the living room where his friends are seated and gathered around the coffee table with a lit birthday cake in the middle. His friends had become my own, and grew to be a family of choice that shared and celebrated milestones together.

I see Junmyeon squished between Baekhyun and Kyungsoo, bickering at each other before he shoves them out the way, getting up and lifting the cake up to me with the saccharine grin on his face. “Happy birthday, love. Make a wish.”

I didn’t have any wishes for myself this time around. What I learned from Junmyeon was to be a little more selfless—and I wished for him to meet someone who loved him as much as I did when I was with him. I wanted him to be as happy as I am now, sacrificing his own happiness so that both of his best friends could be happy too.

fin.

continued ending, though from junmyeon’s standpoint.

#chanyeol fanfics #chanyeol fics #chanyeol x reader #junmyeon x reader #suho x reader #suho fanfics #suho fanfiction #kfanfic #kfanfiction #chanyeol #suho #junmyeon #gyukultfics

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littlemix-discuss · 4 years

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‘confetti’ | album, first listen review (long read)

1. Break Up Song: It’s a classic Little Mix flavor track. I’ll admit, the post-chorus and bridge are probably the best part. I’m still not in love with it, but I don’t “hate” it as much as I did before. However, I still feel like it shouldn't of been a single. And listening to it again and hearing the rest of the album, it does fit better than Holiday. rating: 5/10

2. Holiday: I get why their team probably thought it was a good single choice, and yes, it did have that summer potential. But, overall, it isn’t their best song. It just feels lackluster. rating: 3/10

3. Sweet Melody: The first track to actually invoke any sort of excitement. This is a song that I haven’t been able to get out of my head since I heard it. It’s everything I thought Pop!Mix should be. It’s got that excellent beat that hooks you, the lyrics are easy enough to remember and to get stuck in your head. And it just has that infectious pull to it. rating: 9/10

4. Confetti: This one pleasantly surprised me. On tour, I think it will be a fun one to do. The only thing I’d say is the chorus could’ve had stronger beats (especially in the second chorus), because some parts fall flat. But other than that, it’s probably one of the stronger tracks on the album. rating: 9/10

5. Happiness: Another classic Little Mix track. This one took a few listens to grow on me, but the message on it is what I love. And after everything the girls have been through (personal and professional), I feel like this track embodies the freedom of letting go of that toxicity. rating: 8/10

6. Not A Pop Song: Not a huge fan of this one, the only part I like is “I don’t do what Simon says”. Like ‘Happiness’, the message is there. But something about the song just doesn’t scream repeat to me. rating: 4/10

7. Nothing But My Feelings: I’m not a fan, I wanted to be. But, nothing gripped me in the song. I found it to be easily forgettable. And by no means is it a bad track, but for me, it felt bland. I was hoping for better lyrics, the title was interesting and it could've been a great song lyrically, but it just fell flat in that regard. rating: 5/10

8. Gloves Up: This will be a fierce tour intro. And the chorus reminds me of a Sia track (I just can’t remember which one). It’s literally Power and Salute mixed together. I understand why Little Mix do these type of songs, it’s ones that you can tell they feel comfortable doing. The message, the production, the vocals - they can create an empowering track. I wouldn’t rate it as high as I did Power. But it’s definitely an album standout. rating: 7.5/10

9. A Mess (Happy For You): I really wanted this to be a ballad type song. But I guess that happy/sad element of the track matches the title (like ‘No More Sad Songs’ did). I hate to say it, but I loved the song up until the bridge. It did not work at all, it felt so out of place. It’s a shame, ‘cause this track had potential and then lost it. Maybe it’ll grow on me. But first listen wise, it kinda was a mess. But I loved the message of it though, so that makes me sad I didn’t end up fully loving the track. rating: 7/10

10. My Love Won’t Let You Down: Lyrically this is by far the strongest track on the album. And it could be the girls talking to each other, or talking to their loved ones (or both). I think MLWLYD is where the beauty of Little Mix lays - in the simplicity of just a piano and vocals. My only criticism would be in the end chorus when they all kinda sing on top of each other, it feels off and to cluttered, It’s not my favourite ballad of theirs, but it was a very beautiful song. And it makes me wish they were more ballads on the album, because that’s where the girls shine and where they’re the strongest - vocally and sonically. rating: 8.5/10

11. Rendezvous: Finally, a Sweet Melody ‘Oh my God’ moment. I’ve been waiting for another song to hit me with that excitement the same way ‘Sweet Melody’ did and I think I’ve just found it. ‘Motivates’ little sister has been born, mixed with a little bit of ‘Notice’. I like that it’s kinda chill, but still got that sexy vibe. This one will be a fun to witness on tour. rating: 9/10

12. If You Want My Love: The chorus scared the shit out of me, I was not expecting those hard hitting beats. And it sounds very 2000s. It’s nothing spectacular, and it could definitely grow on me. But it’s got it’s moments - a.k.a, Perrie’s high note. rating: 7/10

13. Breathe: If this was a full on ballad, I reckon the emotion would pour out even more. It’s a cute track, and I do like the overall message of it. But I found it weird they closed the album with this track, I reckon ‘Happiness’ would’ve been the better album closer. Regardless, it was nice to just hear them without any overused, strong beats to drown out everything else. rating: 7.5/10

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Overall, I feel like there’s something missing on this album and on the tracks, and I can’t put my finger on it. And I don’t know if it’s because it’s Pop and I’ve just outgrown Pop!Mix (not Pop music in general, just Little Mix doing full on Pop), or if after LM5 I had different hopes and expectations. But whatever it is, I feel like this album is a step back - lyrically, would be the biggest let down for me, production wise there were a few highlights.

Regardless, it’s not a bad album. And right now, yes, maybe the world needs fun tracks and ones that you can mindlessly bop too and Confetti delivers that. But for me, I wanted more. I kinda want the girls to sit in a room together, maybe with one or two other songwriters they trust and the same producer, and write an album together (like they did majority wise with DNA and Salute). I wanna hear their words. I’m not saying they need to be Taylor Swift’s level when it comes to song writing, but I wanna hear an album that’s just solely them. And I know that may not make sense, ‘cause every album in a way is them. I honestly don’t know how to explain it, it’s hard to say what I want them to do because in some regards they have done bits and pieces of it throughout their albums. But it’s never been cohesive in one album.

I kinda feel with Confetti the girls have struggled with trying to sound mature for the GP, but also trying to stay the same for their younger audience so they don’t alienate them. As a fan who has been with them since DNA, I wanted them to grow with their fanbase (just like Taylor Swift, Ariana Grande, 5SOS, even Demi). LM5 was a good start, and I think that’s what I’m stuck on and why this album isn’t doing it for me. If they released it between Get Weird and Glory Days, or even after Glory Days, then yeah, I’d probably be loving this album. But I think with LM5, that’s the maturity level I wanted them to keep and grow with. Sure, some tracks I don’t really listen to anymore ‘cause they’ve lost my interest - like Forget You Not and Joan of Arc. In truth, the only ones I really listen to are Woman Like Me, Motivate and Notice. But, LM5 was a good step into a somewhat cohesive album.

And look, maybe I’m just that type of person who leans more into the emotion and the story-telling in songs. But I’ve found there isn’t a lot of strong tracks on Confetti where you can hear the growth. And not a lot tracks that I immediately wanna put on repeat (like I did with their previous albums). And maybe in a month or two, I’ll change my opinion and be bopping out to the tracks. But right now, on the first listen very little stood out to me, because it just feels like a carbon copy of Get Weird and Glory Days, but not as strong. And you could argue that Confetti is a celebration of bits and pieces all of their albums, and that’s fine. However, it’s not my favourite album of theirs by any means. But I brought it because I love Little Mix, and maybe at some point in my life I will come back to these tracks and fall in love with them. But as for right now, I’m just not feeling it like some others will.

In conclusion, I’m happy and proud of the girls. I know this album will mean a lot to them and other fans. And during these hard times, they did create a body of work that is filled with good vibes (music wise) and one that holds true to ‘Confetti’ - it’s loud and bold; a party-esque album that will surely get you moving.

#little mix #confetti #personal album review

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wickymicky · 3 years

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my top ten favorite kpop singles of 2021 so far: first quarter edition (january-march)

10. Pixy - Wings: I’m not as into this song as other people, but it’s grown on me, and I think they have a lot of potential. I did not expect a group called “Pixy” to have this dark of a concept haha, I like that. I like the choreo and overall performance of it too, I think that’s the highlight for me

9. G Idle - Hwaa: Not my favorite G Idle title track, but I do think it’s in the top half. It’s interesting to me that they did this song, since it is pretty much all in Korean, there’s no English whatsoever (the only English is a “yeah” at the beginning haha), which for a group like G Idle who has used a lot of English in the past and is very popular internationally is kind of a bold choice, and I’m into it

8. Ateez - Fireworks (I’m The One): I’m still not fully sold on Ateez’s direction post-Wonderland/Answer, with the “end” of their pirate concept (possibly, it seems complicated lol, idk, but you know what I mean anyway), but I do kinda like this song! It sounds kinda like... European lmao. Like I keep thinking I hear accordion in the drop, but idk maybe I’m just imagining things. I mean all that in a good way, btw. Like a good kind of European (if you can imagine such a thing)

7. Shinee - Don’t Call Me: As someone who only got into kpop in 2019, and didn’t even get into a single boy group for like 6 or 7 months (and even then, for a while I just had one single token boy group lol), Shinee isn’t a group that I had checked out much from until fairly recently. I’m still new here, I suppose lol. But yeah idk, this song is good! I love the production and their obvious charisma and talent. Like, I can tell even just from this song that their reputation is earned. It’s just a solid release

6. Purple Kiss - Ponzona: I do prefer Skip Skip, but I decided to limit this to singles and title tracks. I also prefer My Heart Skip a Beat (by a lot, actually), but that came out last year lol. This song has really been growing on me a lot though! Like, a lot actually. I like the violin, I think that’s a really interesting touch haha, I feel like that adds so much to the way the song sounds overall. Yuki’s rapping is impressive too, I like her flow in every song I’ve heard her in so far, especially since she writes her raps herself and Korean isn’t her native language. Honestly that’s one of the most impressive things about Purple Kiss... they seem to be involved in writing all of the things they do! That’s SO RARE for a group to do right from debut, especially for a girl group! I think that’s a great sign that things are changing, and girl groups are being taken more seriously and being allowed more creative freedom than ever before. Ponzona was literally a song written for a monthly evaluation when they were trainees. That’s really impressive. Skip Skip was too, but yeah lol.

5. Pentagon - Do or Not: I mentioned that for a while I just had one token boy group that I liked, and that was Pentagon haha, they were my first. I like that this is a return to their fun sound, but in a different way... like, this song doesn’t sound anything like Shine or Naughty Boy lol. Pentagon are just really good at conveying passion in their songs and I think that shines through here too! I like the way the bass and percussion sound, that’s just quality mixing lol. I also love that even though it’s this kinda pop-punk-ish-doo-wop-ish kpop song, it still has a bit of sadness underneath the fun, which is something I think is a trademark of Pentagon’s style haha. But mostly, it’s fun

4. Tri.Be - Doom Doom Ta: The main reason I checked this out was because it was written and produced by LE from EXID, and you can really tell haha. In fact, her voice is in the song at certain points, and like... she has a really distinctive voice lol. Anyway this song is like a pretty hard commitment to this Latin/moombahton kind of sound, and I’m not entirely sure how I feel about that trend in kpop, but either way, I do think this song is a bop. I’ve had it on repeat way more than everything below this point, in fact all the songs in this top 4 I’ve had on repeat like an order of magnitude more than the songs from 5-10 lol. it’s been a slow beginning to the year. I don’t have a lot of specifics to mention here about Doom Doom Ta, I just think it’s an earworm

3. Weeekly - After School: This was really highly anticipated for me, because I love their previous title tracks. Tag Me especially is a song I consider to be almost perfect, which is not something I say about very many songs at all haha. I personally don’t think After School is quite as good as Tag Me or Zig Zag, but I do really like it! It’s always good to get more fun, exciting, unashamedly catchy songs haha, it’s a breath of fresh air. I love this concept for them too, I think it fits them really well! They’re just a lot of fun. This mini-album, We Play, is my favorite of theirs so far too, though that doesn’t necessarily affect my placement of this song in particular

2. Cherry Bullet - Love So Sweet: God damn, this song is really good. It’s really simple, but that works to it’s advantage imo. I love that the background melody of the instrumental during the verse is the same as the vocal melody in the chorus (or at least very close), that’s just super satisfying. Ending the song with an extended “da da dadada da da” segment was a big risk too lol, that could have been annoying, but idk I think that really is one of the highlights of the song. This song feels like the kind of song where the songwriter came up with that melody and went “YES! this is IT! YESSSSS” and they knew they had come up with something really, really catchy, and they built the rest of the song around showcasing it. And it works!

1. Dreamcatcher - Odd Eye: This probably isn’t much of a surprise lol. But similar to After School... This isn’t my favorite Dreamcatcher comeback, and tbh I think it’s my least favorite of the Dystopia trilogy. But like... that’s still enough to make it my favorite song of the first quarter of 2021. It’s great, I love the way they do the cyberpunk concept and sound without going into the synthwave direction like Everglow La Di Da did. I love La Di Da a ridiculous amount, but I just mean that it’s nice to see variety even within a similar overall concept. Also! Handong is back! And she crushed it! In previous title tracks she and Gahyeon often got the least amount of lines by far, and the least amount of screentime and such, and Gahyeon definitely got times to shine during Scream and Boca and made it clear that she’s leveled up a lot, and I was really hoping that Odd Eye would be able to do the same for Handong (without sacrificing Gahyeon’s screentime and lines)... and yeah, it really was, lol. Handong was all over this song, and her voice reaaaaaally complements this sound. This group has no weak links, and obviously all of us already knew that, but now even the people who only casually listen to them know that without a doubt too.

idk... i’m not totally sure about this list but that feels mostly right to me i guess. I feel like Odd Eye is definitely my favorite so far, but to be honest I don’t feel like it’s the Song of the Year. like, if it had been released in 2020, I don’t think it would have made my top 10. If nothing better than Odd Eye comes out for the rest of the year then sure, it will be my SOTY haha, but idk, I just think that there hasn’t been anything *truly* great so far yet. And that’s okay... I’m very picky about this kind of thing. I don’t give high scores to things that don’t deserve it lol... and like in my opinion there were only 4 songs in 2020 that are the kind of near-perfect instant-soty song I’m talking about, and three of those four came out in the second half of the year. So the fact that I don’t think anything so far has been at that top level isn’t a bad thing, and isn’t really something I’m worried about. I think we definitely have not gotten the best songs of the year yet (unless everything else ends up sucking lol, but idk i hope thats not what happens...)

oh also there was an WJSN comeback today, and that would probably have been on this list, but I havent heard it yet because i was waiting until I finished writing this haha. like, since it came out on March 31st, tbh I’m just gonna count it as an April comeback, so i’m sure it’ll be in my list for the second quarter that i’ll post at the end of June lol. i mean, unless i dont like it. but i’ll probably like it haha.

#in terms of debuts so far... personally im more into and excited about purple kiss.. tho i think doom doom ta is a better song #long post #2021 list #thoughts tag

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ithinkilikeit-reactions · 5 years

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Let me tell you about A.C.E (Appreciation post and a guide)

‘So I have stanned A.C. E since debut and have always enjoyed them, but this comeback really sparked something and they have now become one of my favorite groups of all time. They are still criminally underrated so I thought I would make a little appreciation post, because they deserve it. Also while writing this turned out to be a lowkey guide too.

So let’s start

BEAT INTERACTIVE

All I have to say is in this house we stan CEO Hyeim. Beat Interactive is a company that only houses A.C.E. The respect for them starts from literally the beginning, their name A.C.E starts because they didn’t want to refer to the members as trainees, but as their companies’ aces.

If you don’t know A.C.E stands for Adventure Calling Emotions and adventure is a big part that Beat Interactive let’s A.C.E have. A.C.E are a group going on an adventure being able to find themselves in a company that let’s them.

A.C.E when they were ‘trainees’ were also just like, “Can we busk?” and Beat Interactive was like “You wanna busk? Okay here use the sound system and have fun” Beat Interactive let them choose locations, set ups etc.

Beat Interactive give A.C.E alot of freedom and this is why they have grown so well.

Beat Interactive also makes sure they are well educated. Their Ceo made sure that they would be educated, reading books on feminism and opening a tab on their community to talk about the things they learned and discussing things with fans which I find amazing.

Thank you Beat Interactive, staff and CEO Hyeim for treatting our boys so well!

A.C.E’s growth

I personally very much like it when groups debut and aren’t immediately popular. Let me explain, I feel like debuting with a strong popularity and getting very big on the first song. I feel like that intense popularity adds a lot of pressure to the group from the get go and it also brings a lot of negativity.

A.C.E have had a slow start. Their debut bringing them controversial opinions due to the styling. It seemed like that’s what everyone really focused on. But ‘Cactus’ as a song was a solid debut as a song. The mv wasn’t high budget, but it didn’t need to be. The styling was daring and I really loved it alot and thought it was a good risk to take. The choreo was impeccable but no one really seemed to focus on that, it was all about what they were wearing which was kinda sad. Felt liek their talent was being overlooked.

They then released ‘Callin’ and it’s personally one of my favorites of theirs (who am i kidding all their releases are my favorite) the song is great follow up to ‘Cactus’ keeping up with the hardstyle genre but with a nice twist. The styling for this one wasn’t as risky and the choreo was absolutely amazing and the song showcased all of their talents.

Then A.C.E went on some survival shows, Jun and Chan going on The Unit and Wow, Byeongkwan and Donghun going on Mixnine.

I would just like to add all the members of A.C.E did very well on the shows they were on. Chan making it into the final lineup on The Unit, and being in the temporary group UNB. Jun ranked 21 out of 63 and Chan ranked 9 out of 23 on The Unit.

On Mixnine, Byeongkwan and Donghun made it into the final lineup of Mixnine but never debuted because YG is a snake. Byeongkwan ranked 4, Donghun ranked 8 and Wow ranked 12 out of 72 male trainees.

These survival shows brought more attention A.C.E’s way and was a good choice for them.

After the survival shows, 4/5 of A.C.E came back with ‘Take me Higher’ which was very different from their previous songs and this was their first mini album. ‘Take me Higher’ is a bright happy track with fun colors and shows off their vocals very well.

The choreo was very fun, not as complicated as their previous songs but very fitting and the styling again was different. Men sporting crop tops on live stages with no undershirts was something kinda new and again very refreshing to see.

The B-sides on the album also gave us a chance to see a different side of them. ‘Black and Blue’ being an intense song sung by Jun and Wow. ‘Dessert’ being a fun playful track by Donghun and Byeongkwan. ‘5tar(incomplete version)’ being a beautiful ballad for the fans but sadly missing a member.

I remember this album coming out and I was having an absolutely horrible day and this song coming out. It made my day so much better and just put a huge smile on my face. So I am very thankfull for that.

And then BOOM. ‘Undercover’ came being undoubtebly one of my favorite releases of 2019. To me it felt like forever before A.C.E came back and they came back with vengeance and all 5 members.

‘Undercover’ is such an intense track and the music video matches it very much so. With smooth outfit transitions in choreo parts, awesome styling and Byeongkwan in that yellow leopard crop top and coat with the pigtails and yeah. Wow with glitter brows. Rap dup really shined this era and just amazing.

This choreography is also the toughest A.C.E choreo they have and it is incredibly intense, if you want a good workout, learn that choreo.

This was also an EP with hard hitting tracks like “Do it like me” and “Mr. Bass” and another beautiful fan song “If you heard” which makes me cry.

Savage. This song, this comeback holds one of my favorite tracks of all time. ‘Savage’ really was the comeback I needed in the midst of all the bad stuff going on it really made me very happy.

So ‘Savage’ is really intense with a hard bass and just great. I love this. Wow’s rap is one of my favorites of all time. I wish it was so much longer. The vocals in this song are deep and full. The choreography isn’t their hardest but fits the song and is very high energy.

The b-sides on this album are my absolute favorite. ‘Slow Dive’ is actually one of my favorite songs of all time right now. The vibe is dark and sexy yet still very smooth. ‘So sick’ showcases all of their vocals beautifully and my bias has my favorite part in the song too so it’s just lovely. ‘Holiday’ is a fun bright track which contrasts the title track a little but is still incredible. ‘Take me higher (complete version)’ THEY MADE A VERSION WITH ALL 5 MEMBERS.

The Members

These boys have also been through a lot of growth.

Jun had a training period of 7 years and almost debuted 3 times which must have been incredibly hard. But I am glad because he is now here with these 4 boys who love him and he is definitely one of the best leaders I have seen.

Jun also has this like unique sense of humor and is just incredibly funny even though the members say he isn’t. Also if you are ever bored just look up “A.C.E Idol Class funny moments” because he’s in almost every single one of them and they are hysterical. Also... “Butter”

Donghun is also just incredibly talented. His vocals are some of my favorites, ever. His vocals are so full and warm and they just make me feel comfortable? yeah I guess that’s right.

This boy is so freaking funny and sometimes just downright savage towards the other members, he always makes me laugh and smile. Also he is my main bias wrecker in A.C.E.

Wow is my bias in A.C.E (and my ult) and one of the best dancers I have ever seen. It’s just so fascinating to watch his body move and he does it with so much emotion. If the dance is agressive, he radiates angry energy. If the dance is sensual the way his body moves is smooth and sexy.

He used to be quite shy and awkward when A.C.E first debuted but like it’s so nice to see him coming out of his shell. He’s been my bias since the beginning (I’ve stanned since debut) and I’ve seen him grow. His vocals have improved sooo much over the years and his raps have been getting better and better and he is one of the best in the game but people don’t know about them.

Byeongkwan hi, this man is a triple fucking threat. He is the type of man who excels at everything he tries. It’s so cool watching him perform because of his talent and his stage presence is insane. It’s so surprissing to me that he isn’t more famous or popular.

He also is just a big sweetie like wow he’s so sweet and always tries to do the best for Choice which is awesome. Also crop tops.

Chan Kang Yuchan. I was surprised hearing his vocals. i was not expecting that baby to have such a deep full beautiful voice. His personality is just so incredibly bright and sweet. He’s such an amazing mood maker and is also incredibly funny.

Chan is just the type of person you want to hug and protect and take care of. Maybe pinch his cheeks a little.

This post is way too long. I could talk even more about why they need to be appreciated and why they deserve all the love in the freaking universe. But I’m stopping here.

In conclusion, my mental state hasn’t been the best of late and A.C.E have made me smile through a lot of shit which is really awesome and I am very greatful for that. I wish they would get more recognition because they are genuinely one of the most well rounded groups I have seen and I have seen a lot of groups.

Please shower them with love and affection and please keep a lookout for A.C.E and their future releases and projects.

#a.c.e #appreciation post #donghun #park junhee #jun #wow #kim sehyoon #kim byeongkwan #chan #kang yuchan

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hermionegranger56 · 4 years

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ok lads its time for my breakdown of folklore, something absolutely no one is asking for but here we are!! this album. thIs ALBUMMMM. dear GOD. the intersection of my two favorite things, taylor swift and indie folk???? i feel like i’m dreaming. when she announced the surprise drop i literally burst into tears and evidently for good reason lol.

anywho here’s the thing. Red has been my all time favorite album for 8 years now. it holds such an important place in my life and i never thought anything she did could come close (though Lover almost did). but this. THIS IS BETTER THAN RED

the lyrical genius is unmatched here. taylor isn’t just writing songs here, this is POETRY. every song is nuanced, intricate, devastatingly beautiful, with words that’ll haunt me for a long time. and the fact that it’s stories, literal folklore, no longer just about her own life is incredibly creative and is executed so well for someone who has interwoven her life into her entire body of music thus far. folklore blends facts with fiction so seamlessly and is a true exhibition of taylor’s power as a songwriter.

and the vibessss!! from haunting heartbreak songs, to ethereal lost-in-the-woods vibes, to a comforting return to her old self, this album has everything. taylor is without a doubt one of the most versatile artists of our generation, having success and skill in multiple genres and folklore only solidifies this fact.

ALL RIGHT KIDS LETS JUMP IN

the 1: hell yeah explicit tswift give it to me lol you ARE on some new shit!! ok when i first listened to this i hadn’t read her statement about the other perspectives and i was about to RIOT about her and joe breaking up (like they could ever lol). this is such a catchy beat, such a casual?? look at such a painful feeling? a really good start to this album. the part where she goes another day waking up aLONE killlllllls me wow

fave lines: “in my defense i have none/for never leaving well enough alone”

cardigan: (don’t get me started on the mv it’s gorgeous) YES THE TEENAGE LOVE TRIANGLE suchhh a good concept!! the melody of this song is unreal, the chorus makes me want to scream it’s so beautiful, the i-i-i is SOMETHING ELSE. it’s crazy how just the melody makes betty’s pain so palpable, but so enchanting at the same time. it’s bittersweet and cinematic and i’m in love. PETER LOSING WENDY GOD. easily top 5 song here

fave lines: “when you are young they assume you know nothing”, “cause i knew you/ heartbeat on the high line/ once in 20 lifetimes i” “you drew stars around my scars/but now i’m bleeding”

the last great american dynasty: watch hill!!! her watch hill house!! i live near there!! oh i think this song is so clever and i love how it ties into mad woman as well as harkens back to starlight. i LOVE the way she ties her self in, “and then it was bought by me” like ughhh her mind? and its catchy AF

fave lines: “i had a marvelous time ruining everything”

exile: YOU KNOW HOW TO DO AN INDIE ALBUM??? BRING BON IVER INTO THIS SHIT!! wowww this song is haunting and is definitely the “i’m you but stronger” version of The Last Time. the overlap of both of them singing and their parallel lines are flawless. i could play this on repeat for hours and contemplate my whole existence

fave lines: “you never gave a warning sign/i gave so many signs”

my tears ricochet: ok somehow a track 5 with tears in the title is not the saddest song here but DAMN is it good. I love the visual of someone watching over their funeral and reacting. the music is stunningggg here. ALSO i am pretty convinced this is about the whole scott/scooter drama, like the lyrics fit so well? and she said it was the first song she wrote so the timeline kinda fits?? geniusss

fave lines: “I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace”, “and if i’m dead to you/why are you at the wake?”

mirrorball: ohhhh this one is so pretty!! it just makes me want to dance around the kitchen with the person i love??? its comforting, ethereal, happyyy ugh i love it. I also think it could be about her relationship with her fans? like her music shows us different sides of ourselves idk? or just absorbing into a relationship?

fave lines: “on my tallest tiptoes/shining just for you”

seven: i’m gonna call this now: this is going to be the most underrated song on this album. it is STUNNING. POETIC. HEARTBREAKING. the music is so hauntingly nostalgic. and the lyrics, holy absolute shit. they’re a delicate testament to childhood, memory, and innocent love. it’s gut wrenching and i love it so so much

fave lines: “i’ve been meaning to tell you/i think your house is haunted/your dad is always mad/and that must be why”, “and just like folk song/our love will be passed on”, “before i learned civility/ i used to scream ferociously” ALL OF IT

august: and now we get the girl james cheated with’s perspective, which i think is great. its sunny, wistful and sad underneath all that beautiful production. when she slides from the chorus to the “back when we we’re changing for the better” and hits that “mineeee to lose” GOD, it just fills your chest. i feel like even if you never have, this makes anyone feel like they know exactly what a summer fling feels like. one of my faves

fave lines: “august slipped away/like a bottle of wine”, “cancel my plans just in case you call/ and say meet me behind the mall”

this is me trying: the slow pacing of this melody serves to show these EXQUISITE lyrics here. this is so intimate and personal and i feel like everyone can relate to this feeling of just trying to hold on and put on a brave face?

fave lines: “they told me all of my cages were mental/ so i got wasted like all my potential”

illicit affairs: ok all you need to know about this one is a) I’m obsessed b) this is the closest she has come to creating a bridge that makes me feel like the All Too Well bridge has, like scream sobbing in the car type vibe??? its unreal. and this song makes me feel that shitty feeling of: “this was supposed to be casual but oops its very much not” hmmm maybe that’s where the scream sobbing comes from hahah

fave lines: “don’t call me kid/don’t call me baby/look at this godforsaken mess that you made me/you showed me colors you know i can’t see with anyone else”

invisible string: this. THIS is probably her most stunning love song. like. i thought it was Lover. i was wrong. this one is confidently from Taylor’s perspective, about Joe and dear lord i want a love like theirs. and shit does this song put the folk in folklore, the music is so simple and gorgeous and harkens back to her country roots without losing this new sound she has. and the first few notes remind me of Mystery of Love by Sufjan Stevens so instantly im sold. this and betty are tied for my number 1, it’s just too beautiful

fave lines: “time curious time/give me no compasses/give me no signs” “isn’t it just so pretty to think/all along there was some invisible string/tying you to me”, “cold was steel of the axe that i had to grind/for the boys who broke my heart/now i buy their babies presents”, “hell was the journey/but it brought me heaven”

mad woman: FUCK YOU FOREVERRRRRR!!! yes taylor said fuckkkk ugh i LOVE this vibe, the revenge of the mad woman that the town cast out is so eerie and powerful, i’m obsessed. it ties back into the maddest woman of TLGAD and it feels like a spiritual sequel to The Man, the same feminist thread weaving through it. the lyrics are razor sharp and biting, i love it

fave lines: “and you poke that bear/till the claws come out/ and you find something/ to wrap your noose around”, “it’s obvious wanting me dead has really brought you two together”

epiphany: so uhhh THIS is the saddest song on folklore. fight me. the seamless comparison between wartime and the pandemic and waiting for some epiphany that could make sense of all the horrors surrounding the both. idk man, as someone who’s been a covid nurse since March, i just….this one HURTS. similar to Soon You’ll Get Better tbh

fave lines: “hold your hand through plastic now/doc i think she’s crashing out/and somethings you just can’t speak about”

betty: OH I LOVE IT WITH MY WHOLE HEART! this is such a TRIUMPHANT return to old taylor, it is so joyful but sad at the same time?? the harmonica?? the last part of the love triangle?? it sounds like Taylor Swift and Fearless all grown up and it makes me ache for back then, but love where we are right now. tbh the first time i heard this i sobbed through the whole thing just out of pure nostalgia. she’s back but at the same time she never left. this feels like a love song to original fans and it. is. incredible. my favoriteeee goddd

fave lines: THE WHOLE CHORUS BABYYYYY

peace: it’s gorgeous, especially the guitarrr ugh. this feels like delicate’s quiet older sister. i think it’s definitely about joe and how taylor, despite loving him, still has these insecurities and fears about what a relationship with someone in her position could be like? like there will be struggles, but he’s her family and she “would die for you in secret”. stunning

fave lines: “i’m a fire and i’ll keep your brittle heart warm”, “the devils in the detail/but you’ve got a friend in me”, “give you my wild/give you a child”

hoax: i’m surprised she ended it on a sad one (but we still have the lakes!!) but this song is hauntingly beautiful WOW. every line of this absolutely floors me. i think this one will also be largely underrated, but it is pure poetry and deserves so so much hype

fave lines: “stood on the cliffside/screaming give me a reason/your faithless love’s the only hoax i believe in”, “it still hurts underneath my scars/from when they pulled me apart/but what you did was just as dark” “my kingdom come undone/ my broken drum/ you have beaten my heart”

ANYWHO TAYLOR HAS PRODUCED HER BEST WORK TO DATE AND IM READY FOR SAD GIRL AUTUMN

#taylor swift #folklore #tswift #folklore the album #taylor swift folklore #ts8 folklore #folklore era #betty #august #cardigan #exile

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deanky · 4 years

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Here are some little like ‘reviews’ of all the Oingo Boingo albums... Under cut LOL... I just like to talk about Oingo Boingo I am so obsessed right now they have become tied for Mr. Bungle as favorite band... But anyways... Hope you enjoy ^_^

Only a Lad: Very fun sound as a whole. I enjoy how like poppy and synthy it is and stuff and that one weird electronic voice Mr. Elf man does in like every song. I remember like actually not liking most of the songs first time I heard it and I’m not sure why because I enjoy 9/10 out of them a lot now... But then again I like almost never really like an album the first time I hear it LOL I have a mean soul. A lot of the songs have pretty evil words in them but I have like slight respect for how much hatred Danny Elfman seems to have had for everyone on the entire planet at the time of writing. And for the majority of songs I cannot really complain about because I think it fits theme of like very happy sounding song but nasty words in it duality of man and such. Only one I really do not like is Capitalism because it has the whiniest lyrics of all and also it just does not sound good like as a song I think I am sorry. I must say it. Forgive me. I was so thrilled hearing Nasty Habits for the first time because I really like songs that sound like a homosexual cartoon villain would sing them to you. Well that’s all. Only a Lad itself was one of the first songs of theirs I heard except sped up and it had a picture of anime Bart Simpson on it. I like it. Good song. Recently I cannot stop getting it and Little Girls stuck in my head. That’s all

Nothing to Fear: Everything about this album is sooooo sooo good it is like so incredibly catered specifically to my tastes. One of the few albums I have loved immediately as soon as I heard I finished listening for the first time and was immediately like oh this is going in my favorites. I add some points also for absolutely incredible beautiful cover art it’s got weird colors weird animals logo made of worm things it’s so beautiful it makes me want to cry. I think it gets SLIGHTLY weaker in its second half but that is hard not to do with albums. That said though a lot of songs that I felt were slightly worse at first have risen to being my favorites of the album like Why’d We Come and Reptiles and Samurai. Didn’t know what to think about Running on a Treadmill at first but I think it works very well in its simplicity and it is very catchy I can imagine people like singing it on actual treadmill and like jumping around abd being in zero gravity for some reason it is like that music video where they are in the plane but it is treadmills. Well, hi. The only ones that feel like slightly slightly worse to me are Whole Day Off and Islands but I think I am growing to like both of those a lot more too. My favorites though are Grey Matter and Insects and Wild Sex and also Nothing to Fear the titular song and Why’d We Come and Reptiles and Samurai which is over half of the songs so I think that’s good. I remember listening to Private Life like 5 times before listening to the rest of the album but I always forgot how it went immediately after not sure why because I’d say it is a reasonably catchy song. Anyways INCREDIBLE album. Rude lyrics? Still a thing but tend to be much more agreeable like it is obvious who is being made fun of in like Grey Matter and Nothing to Fear and I say the fun making is well deserved! Even though I may be the target of Grey Matter I understand and I am sorry. The general sound is also amazing I LOVE all the weird noises and metal stuff and clanks and clonks and all the xylophone. Dude the xylophone is so good. Synth and xylophone and guitar they are all best friends and they sound so cool together and I think xylophones should be more widely used in like “pop” music as a whole whatever that defines. I keep wanting to start a band and just play xylophone. Like what’s anybody gonna do to stop me? I love xylophone. That’s all

Good for Your Soul: I wasn’t so impressed by this one the first time I heard it but it quickly wormed its way up to a very close #2 and possibly even tied with Nothing to Fear as my favorite album of theirs. The album art on this one is also really good I will say! I felt like slightly let down at first by it just because it’s so hard to live up to how beautiful of a cover Nothing to Fear has in my mind. But its art is so cool too. Muscle man in wobbly world. What’s more to love (Side note I enjoy the song Wobbly World it is not an Oingo Boingo song it is by Devo I should listen to more Devo.) The first time I listened the only songs that REALLY jumped out at me super hard were No Spill Blood and Fill the Void, and I think those 2 are still tied as my favorites. I LOVE the whole like rhythm No Spill Blood has going on and the weird animal noises and also the lyrics they are not about Animal Farm they are about The Island of Dr. Moreau he did those surgeries don’t you know he made the animals have to be men and they were like are we not men but they didn’t say they were Devo sorry I keep talking about Devo in this Oingo Boingo album review. And BTW Fill the Void also is really great and has possibly my favorite set of lyrics in any song ever to exist which is the part like “Every little thing is a piece of a larger thing / Every little fish is a tyrant of the sea / Every little atom is a master of his family / Every single piece calls my name / What do they want from me?” It is so good it makes me go so insane I love it. Another song that works really well in just being a simple thing. It is so nice and cool it feels like being in space and you are in one of the levels of one of those Kirby spinoff games where he’s like a ball and you’re rolling him around NOT Canvas Curse the other ones like Dream Course I think. Anyways though while I wasn’t super big on all the other songs they ended up like slowly coming back into my head one by one until I was obsessed with all of them. First it was Pictures of You. Then it was Nothing Bad Ever Happens to Me (would put that in my top 3 as well) and then Dead or Alive and then Little Guns and then Cry of the Vatos and then Wake Up It’s 1984 and then Sweat and then the titular song AND Who Do You Want to Be it was like. Wow. What a world. WDYWTB + Good for Your Soul + Sweat were the 3 that didn’t really do it for me as much for a while but now I’ve been really enjoying them too so I think I can say I love every single song on this album. It is becoming my best friend. It’s sooo good. It feels like living in one of those fake Utopian cities and there’s actually something sinister going on behind the scenes. Like I will start seeing colors and freaking about it any time soon. Random memory that unlocked in me is that I used to be incredibly obsessed with The Book Thief and its concept of death when I was in like 6th or 7th grade like uncannily so but I never talked about the book ever I just hid it away in my mind. My sad story. Sorry everyone. That’s all

So-Lo: This one is technically just Danny Elfman but you know it is an Oingo Boingo album man they got the whole band there they were just having licensing issues because new label and stuff is my understanding. And they were like. Well let’s take advantage of this and do some less standard Oingo Boingo songs. That is how I grasp this situation I don’t know how correct I am her I actually don’t know that much about O.B. outside of the songs at this point I still cannot name any non-Danny Elfman member and I am really sorry for this and must learn to atone for my ways. This is a good album though. Once again has really good cover art I will say. It’s like well hello there Mr. Elf man you’ve got some eyes sliding off your face and some funny colors and are controlling some little puppet things maybe it’s like you do you man LOL am I right or am I right! I like this album. This was yet another one where I listened the first time and was like. Man I’m not really feeling it with any of these songs. However I do enjoy that they all sound kind of like they were recorded on a Sega Genesis. I mean it does have very Genesis-y noises I know this was the 80s and it would be more accurate to say the Sega Genesis soudns like this album but you know what I mean. Anyways nothing grabbed me at first but upon my second listen I became extremely obsessed with the song “Go Away” and then listened to it on repeat for 2 hours straight and it still hasn’t got old for me I still like it very good song. Definitely my favorite. Tied with Everybody Needs which is also a very fun song I became similarly enamored with like a day later but didn’t listen to quite as much LOL. But anyways I went through that oh-so-familiar process which I must warn you is also the process I go through for every single album after this! - Where all the other songs started worming their way into my head and I was like oh brother I am beginnign to like them all now! Good for Your Soul, I think, marked like more obvious change from songs tending to be like “This is what Danny Elfman thinks of the world phrased in a humorous way” to more like actual stories and stuff, although the former wasn’t rid of entirely and the latter hadn’t just popped up or anything. But I think this album continued that in a really nice way and while it can be vague, listening to it I always feel that there is like one solid story all the song narratives go throughout. Someone pointed out in like Youtube Comments that Go Away feels like the sadder side of Cool City and to me it feels like the whole album is kind of in that vein. Seems to me like all the songs are in the Cool City itself and you’re seeing like the various different horrible things that go on in that town and horrible people that live in it. Yknow? Like Tough as Nails and Everybody Needs make me think of like various awful weird a$$ holbs living there and then stuff like Sucker for Mystery and Lightning and It Only Makes Me Laugh. Well they are clearly from the perspectives of some guy. The same guy? Maybe maybe not I don’t feel like they are the same guy. But it feels like they are like experiencing weird horrible sh*t in this horrible town that is filled with racists but also gay people. I like this album I enjoy it

Dead Man’s Party: OK I am sorry to say. This is a good album but it hasn’t COMPLETELY grown on me yet. But I DO like it a lot. I enjoy it it’s good. I really really love Just Another Day and the titular song and Heard Somebody Cry and Nobody Lives Forever and Weird Science which is over half of them so not bad all things considered. And I do not DISLIKE any songs. But the other ones haven’t quite grown on me yet. This album does kind of shift into like the more commercial stuff it’s not like generic pop or nothing. But it is like slightly strange to get used to. That said. The songs I like I REALLY like thye are so good. No One Lives Forever is an incredible incredible song just like Nasty Habits it fulfills my love of songs that sound like they are being sung by evil guys in cartoons but are not they’re actually being sung by Danny Elfman who is an evil guy in real life. Sorry I didn’t mean it he probably is not that evil I’m sure he’s perfectly nice Mr. Elf man if you are reading this I apologize. Anyways though. I like the general sound of this album I will say! I think though it has thing going on where like, in my mind, some of the songs feel like way too happy and overly peppy almost like mocking. I have a weird mind and a weird way of processing things and I am also incredibly afraid of everything on this planet so keep that in mind BTW I am sorry. But like Stay and Fool’s Paradise and Help Me and Same Man I was Before all have that kind of feeling to me, it’s like these are so cheerful and cheesy sounding to me it kind of scares me a little bit. However... I am starting to feel this less with Help me and Stay, and also I felt this a little bit with Heard Somebody Cry at first as well and I no longer do. So maybe I’m still going through the motions of song-liking as I do. As I said though the favorites on here are incredible. Weird Science may have been written for strange movie deal and they may be really saddened by its memory or maybe just the music video’s memory but it’s a very fun song nevertheless. Dead Man’s Party itself it really fun true classic. Very orange song to me. It’s orange and purple like I hear it and I am like ah yes I am experiencing orange and purple. Very nice shades of orange and purple though, and they are mixing together in pleasing ways and throwing a big party and everyone’s invited you might even say it’s a dead man’s party heh heh heh (grins devilishly). I think this like takes the kind of narratives in Good for Your Soul and So-Lo and like takes it to best form! In that it has a very clear yet not super specific narrative going on throughout the whole album, I really like whenever an album has songs set up so pleasingly and nice like that it makes me sad when they’re just like in random order. But of course this album is all about death and accepting it and stuff and like all the different feelings of sadness and happiness and stuff that all go into it! And I like its message a lot, like obviously you shouldn’t want to die but don’t fear it. It has a very nice depiction of the afterlife. I like all the stuff in Beetlejuice and Corpse Bride with their similar interpretations too although Beetlejuice isn’t quite as positive about it LOL. I want to watch Corpse Bride again. I want to see another singing Danny Elfman skeleton. I want to see the Peter Lorre worm. My one complaint with the album narrative is that Weird Science goes at the end it kinda ruins the whole story a little bit but I can’t fault them because like where COULD they put it? I think it might work kind of well as the first song because like trying to make frankenstein guy before all the accepting death stuff makes sense. But also. It would be a weird opener. Also the album art is so incredible I love it I want to join their party it’s beautiful. I did not mean for this review to get as long as it did. They just keep getting longer each album I’m sorry the length does not show my opinion but I just keep getting more excited each album

Boi-Ngo: Will admit this one is my least favorite. And once again my bias shows because it has cover art I don’t like very much. It’s just real guys looking at you. Where’s the funny Oingo Boingo touch where’s the charm people!??!? it makes me sad. And also, as a whole, while I DO like most of the songs I feel like I don’t like them as much as I like any of the ones on other albums, and it also has my least favorite song I’ve heard other than Capitalism which is We Close Our Eyes sorry I’ve seen a lot of people who really like that one but it just scares me. It feels so insincere to me it makes me feel that thing once more where it’s like this song is waaayyy to happy and peppy to not feel like it’s kind of sinister deep down. I apologize. It is a fun album however! I think it kind of goes back more to “Danny Elfman’s humorous observations about life”, which is not always a bad thing, but it seems to revert a little bit too much back to like him just being kind of whiny and not making much of a point in like, say, New Generation. Although it is a nice song I think! It scares me when he goes like now he’s got you by the balls. I understand the point of that lyric. But it frightens me. I think my favorites are Home Again, Elevator Man, Not My Slave (although lyrics feel like slightly concerning), Outrageous, and Pain. Which once again is more than half the album so shows what I know complaining about it this whole time.

Dark at the End of the Tunnel: I feel bad for this album because before listening to it I always forgot it existed, like I listened to Boi-Ngo and was like aw man I only have one album left! Oh wait nevermind I have 2. And now I keep fearing there’s another one I forgot not including like the live albums and singles stuff. Maybe there is.... haunting me But anyways... I already did like incomprehensible post talking about this one earlier LOL which inspired me to do more equally incomprehensible things on all the other albums hence this post. So I’ve already said a lot of what I have to say about this and hope not to repeat it too much... but... LOL I was so afraid wondering if I would actually like this one or not... I wanted to just because of how awesome the cover art is. And I was afraid because I wasn’t really a big fan of most of the songs at first. But I think with this album and the whole Boingo era they were moving towards like more orchestral stuff and changing their sound and all... So it was a bit strange to get used to at first but the more I listened the more I enjoyed everything I guess like taking in all the instruments and textures and what not. A lot of the songs in this one also feel like kind of creepily cheery but I think it works best for this album specifically, because as I’ve said before it feels very intentional - there is like whole dual thing of more dark mysterious sections and light-hearted happy sections in most of the songs. Although my top 3 are all songs that mostly just have the former going on... Right to Know, Long Breakdown, and Run Away. I also really enjoy When the Lights Go Out, Skin, Out of Control (though it still feels like vaguely scary to me LOL), and Glory Be... But I keep finding myself getting all the others stuck in my head as well. So still growing on me LOL! I am beginning to appreciate all the other songs more for those cheerier parts as well yknow... I think this whole album has a very fantastical vibe to it LOL but definitely like, a very old fantasy. Like they discovered this album in a giant wizard’s tower like ten thousand years ago and now it’s been unearthed again. But it was created by a child wizard who was like 5 years old. But still had a wizard beard. That’s the guy on the cover I’ve decided. Little wizard from long ago. However... It does feel like it’s kind of setting up something. Like all the songs do... whole album is good but feels like it’s kind of a preparation for the next one. Which doesn’t make it bad! Just like I feel like it’s kind of part of a set... Incomplete on its own yknow? I would probably rank it in my lower 4 of all the albums but I’ll still say I enjoyed it quite a bit, that is no insult. And I like wizards

Boingo: This album is SO good dude. I’m glad this is what they left off on. Really great finishing album... I have a weird timeline involving this one because it was actually the first album I listened to, my dad showed it to me, but I only ever listened up to Lost Like This before very recently and by recently I mean today and I am still listening to Changes for the first time as I write this which is probably a bad idea but I am doing it anyways. Anyways though... The first O.B. songs my dad showed to me ever were Insanity from this album and Dead Man’s Party the song, and despite how different their two sources are they both have extremely similar structure I think. And so I kind of painted this picture of like all Oingo Boingo songs being similarly structured around 6-7 minutes and mostly repeating the same different sections in slightly different ways. And I am pleased that this album kind of fulfills that - a lot of the songs are like 2-3x longer than they really need to be but I enjoy that because I love long songs. As I mentioned earlier, DatEotT feels like it’s just the beginning of something, and this provides a very satisfying ‘second half’. I think it works well by itself too, though! Boingo marks such a big change musically from everything else before even DatEoT but it somehow stays very true to their old spirit anyways.. But everything feels so much grander and I really like it. Almost every song has a pretty wistful melancholy feel but at the same time ALSO almost every song but like a different set of almost every song is very big and bombastic. So it definitely has that “well this is our last album goodbye” feel to it. But it’s OK. It’s like a big grand finale. If there was a like an Oingo Boingo musical that had every single song for some reason and lasted like 10 hours I feel like the other albums could be switched around the whole thing regardless of their actual releases, but this one would HAVE to be last. Adding to that, I feel like it really like takes a lot of the earlier concepts I’ve liked a lot in previous albums and had them return. Like So-Lo, many of the songs have pretty different narratives, but all feel like they can be one loose intertwined thing. Pedestrian Wolves and Lost Like This definitely feel connected for one... and like Insanity and Changes provide like nice bookends where the first is like analyzing the world around us and then the second is analyzing the self. Side note. Danny Elfman is always referring to himself as stupid in Oingo Boingo songs. And sometimes it’s just like PoV character or something. But it ticks me off a little bit because he is like clearly not stupid he is like a crazy evil genius. But ALSO I’m not really sure what exactly the whole story of Boingo is, but it just feels connected in some sort of mysterious way yknow? Maybe it will appear to me later... If Dark at the End of the Tunnel was created by a little five year old wizard ten thousand years ago, this was created by the same wizard when he was reaching the end of his life and was in the wizard’s nursing home in like the 1920s. It still feels like mildly aged, there is SOMETHING about it that feels like it’s meant to be played on like an extremely old awful record player, but it has a much more modern feeling. It almost feels like another interpretation of the afterlife... Maybe that more Beetlejuice kind where it’s just like real life at first but if you peek around the corner you’ll find all the weird sandworms and colorful ghosts and stuff. Anyways though. This album is so good. Not my favorite right now, but definitely in top 3, like at the moment of writing this I would say. #1 is Nothing to Fear. #2 is Good for Your Soul. #3 is Boingo. But I am loving it soooo much on my first actual full listen even though I’ve had time to like absorb half the songs already admittedly. So it might end up being my favorite after all! I think my 3 favorite tracks also on this are Insanity, Lost Like This, and Hey!. Random completely unrelated parallel to my other favorite band. I like that they have a song called Hey! and Mr. Bungle has a song called Hi! It all fits together. And they both have the exclamation point. But anyways ALSO since I’ve only finished listening for the first time Changes finished while I was writing this BTW. I am still figuring out my opinions on the rest of the songs. Don’t think the I am the Walrus cover QUITE does it for me, I like Spider and War Again but not sure if they’re favorites. I hated Can’t See/Useless the first time I listened but now I like it how about that! ONE MORE thing I like about this. Is its songs feel like continuations of stuff in other albums. Although that may just be because of similar themes! Like, War Again feels like a continuation of both Nothing to Fear and Little Guns but it’s about similar subjects to both. And Tender Lumplings, Little Girls, no real explanation needed there. Insanity and Nasty Habits match up pretty well, with both just being like about hating the world although Nasty Habits is more specific than that LOL. Mary is a girl who is unfairly ostracized, Johnny of Only a Lad is a boy who is unfairly praised, you know. And also one more thing ONE more I know this one ALSO kinda has the classic Danny Elfman yells about things stuff going on but I feel like this is the album where it works best. But maybe I am just a hypocrite. OK that’s all. Hi

#definitely going to delete this later LOL I get embarassed #but i had fun writing all this incomprehensible stuff

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hes-writer · 5 years

Text

A Cheat III

Summary: Harry and Y/N are drifting, Y/N catches him

Warnings: angst, really mild mentions of sex

Word Count: 4.8k

Part 4

—–

“I’m sleeping in the guest room. I think I need a change of scenery.”

He was about to turn in his heels, suddenly annoyed by her pestering.

“Wait! I think we need to talk,” Y/N stands swiftly, putting her palm against his shoulder to which Harry curves immediately. He retracts with great speed, almost as if her hand was poison. His eyes catch hers with loaded surprise.

Nonetheless, he sighs, saying, “Look, I’m tired. We’ll talk tomorrow,”

“But Harry, I th-,” She gets cut off by Harry’s booming voice.

“I said we’ll talk tomorrow, Y/N” He said sternly, Harry’s mind flashes to a memory of his actions and makes a decision quickly, “I have someone I want you to meet at work anyway.”

Harry woke up from his deep sleep, yawning and rubbing his left eye with a balled fist. His chest was exposed from the lack of clothing and from the soft glow of the morning light, he could see faded marks littering his skin. The bruises didn’t come from Y/N’s lips, and frankly, he didn’t even think of her once when he was receiving them from somebody else. He has put himself in an ultimatum because he knows that he should feel some form of guilt, regret, remorse or just something that shows that Y/N still owns his heart. But truthfully, he doesn’t and he’s absolutely confused of what he should do. Like Y/N, he’s asking himself questions; should he tell her? Should he admit that his feelings were not like they used to be? Should he casually mention that his heart no longer belongs to her, but instead another person has cradled it as theirs?

As detached as he is from Y/N, he still cares for her regardless if it’s in a different way now. Platonic, you can say. It just wasn’t the same anymore. He once saw a future with her, maybe a kid or two, identical to either of them hobbling around in the shared home they currently lived in. Now, it’s all gone. Something in him stopped producing feelings of love for her, can you really blame him? I mean, if he’s not happy, shouldn’t he leave? Harry stretches his limbs, bones cracking in relief while he groans, rolling over to the side of the bed, trying to sit up as best as he could in his tired state. He cranes his neck, looking around for his basic white shirt that he must’ve strewn off from his body during the night. He maneuvers the thick duvet up and down, but to no such luck. He bends down, maybe it fell on the floor, he thought.

He finds his shirt, grabbing it quickly before goosebumps start to adorn his skin. Harry gasps as a realization makes it way in his foggy brain. What the fuck was that? His eyes widen briefly before he snaps his back again, searching for the mauve panties he swore he just saw. It wasn’t a figment of his imagination because there it is; left untouched and only a remnant of the night he had with her. He chuckles to himself, it has been such a long time since he felt that good. Speaking of her, he fumbles with the items on his nightstand before taking his sleek phone in his hands. He opens the “Messages” app, but before he could type a letter on the bar, a quiet knock sounds through the wood of the door. Harry’s head jolts towards it; fearing he got caught even though he wasn’t really doing anything wrong. Right now, at least. He tosses the underwear under the sheets before clearing his throat and answering the person behind the door, presumably Y/N.

“What?”

Y/N opens the door slightly, peeking her head in through the gap. She gasps at the sight, “Sorry! I’m sorry. I didn’t know you weren’t ready yet,” Y/N thinks to herself, why the heck is she apologizing for seeing him bare with boxers on? After all, they’ve seen each other butt naked countless times, it shouldn’t even be a surprise anymore.

“Why would I be ready? I told you I don’t have time for whatever the fuck it is that you planned for us,” Hary grits his teeth, annoyed since he already made plans in his head–5 minutes ago– but still.

Something clicks in Y/N, anger surging through her so suddenly it made her dizzy. She raises her voice a tad, “ I planned something? I recall me saying that we had to talk last night, did you even hear me?” Y/N shakes her head, chuckling sarcastically, “Of course not! When have you ever last listened to me anyway?”

Harry rolls his eyes. He listened, yes. He just didn’t care enough to take it into consideration to maybe comfort her when she needed it.

“Whatever. Just get ready. We’re going to the studio remember, you wanted me to meet someone,” Y/N bites her lip as soon as she spoke the last part of the sentence, growing nervous at who it will be.

—–

Y/N and Harry are in the Range Rover about to be on their way. However, Harry’s too preoccupied with his phone to notice Y/N huffing on the passenger’s side, arms crossed across her chest, feeling a little bit antsy since they’ve been sat down for about five minutes now. And, no matter what position she sat in, the sun somehow still blinded her directly, even with the shade flipped over. She looks over to Harry just in time to see him bite his lip, smiling down at the device he continued to tap on. She reaches over the console, meaning to turn the volume up on the radio because if they’re going to be here for a while, she might as well try to calm her sense. However, Harry must’ve seen her arm from his peripherals, deciding that she’s out to pry his phone from his hands, he jerks back swiftly to prevent her from doing so. She stares up at him alarmed at the sudden action, Khalid caressing her ears with his voice. Y/N stares down at his phone, trying to figure out if it caused him to do such thing to which Harry briskly tries to hide from her sight. Turning it over, he clicks on the lock button, clearing his throat uncomfortably while he shifts in his seat preparing to actually drive.

“Who was it?”

Harry turns his head to do a shoulder check as he pulls the gear shift into drive before stepping on the accelerator to get the car moving. He tries to get his thoughts in order before saying anything. He didn’t want to say spill something accidentally.

“Someone from work, don’t worry about it,”

She nods as if to say that she understands. She doesn’t though because still, her mind started doubting his words. Even after his reassurance, she wasn’t sure what to believe in anymore. Anything that is coming out of his mouth could be lies and she wouldn’t even know if he was telling the truth or not. Y/N doesn’t know him anymore, she concludes. And it hurts her deeply because he’s the man whom she gave everything to, trusted him with her whole heart even when she was fragile because the love she felt was too strong to ignore. Everything she was was all influenced by his constant presence in her life for the past years they were together, and now that he’s slipping away, it was like she was losing a part of herself with him. Every milestone she hit, he was there to support her; he made her feel loved, wanted and adored–something she barely felt especially with her broken family. He made life feel so warm, she didn’t know that a person could be your home. Harry was home.

A tear slips down her chin to her hand limply laying on her lap, catching her attention and realizing that she was getting awfully emotional all of a sudden. She swipes the tears away to her temples, hoping that Harry didn’t notice. Of course, he didn’t.

His eyes were focused on the road, hands gripping the black leather wheel tightly, gnawing on his pink bottom lip. He couldn’t wait to see her today. He knows he shouldn’t be thinking about another woman especially because his girlfriend was currently sitting next to him looking awfully sad, but before he could question it, she turns her face to glance at the window the same time the stop light flashes green. For a brief moment, he lets his mind wander.

Imagine how broken she’ll look when you tell her the truth, he thought to himself. So he decides that he won’t. Yes, she definitely deserves to know the truth but, she doesn’t need it right now. Harry also decides that if ever, he’ll let her find out herself.

Except she already did.

And maybe Harry’s too much of a coward to admit the truth to her, but he really couldn’t bring himself to spew the words from his mouth. What was he supposed to say? Truth is, their relationship got to the point where it was so dead– as in nothing was happening to them. Nothing interesting, to say the least. Since Harry’s second album was a top priority for him at the moment, it was absolutely relevant for him to gather inspiration from everything he can to make it more personal and vulnerable like his first one. He used to write songs about his previous relationships where his girlfriends and boyfriends mostly all turned out to be using him for their benefit. It hurt Harry and made him more guarded with who he let in inside his walls.

When he met Y/N, he was extra wary of her intentions just as she was of his. Harry’s heart fluttered whenever he saw her, but something inside him held him back from fully pursuing a relationship with her right off the bat, as he usually would. That was the first burst of inspiration Harry got from her, he wrote songs about feelings of happiness and possibly finding the one; Woman. Then came his courage and he asked her out after months of playing cat and mouse with the woman he so desperately wanted to be his. When she said ‘yes’, he was elated and he wrote more songs about it. The usual.

He’s not blaming her for his lack of inspiration, he’s scowling at the relationship they have. It was going well, too well—very fairy-tale like that he’s sure he has squeezed the last bits of romanticized words and gestures of compassion from his brain and he can’t write about it anymore. His artistic side wanted his album to have something for everybody and an album full of love songs isn’t gonna make the cut in his opinion. He needed that extra spice, the drama, the twinge of rebellion and uniqueness that he couldn’t quite grasp because he hasn’t experienced it lately, and Harry writes from experience. So when the opportunity showcased itself, he immediately took a leap of faith, not thinking about the consequences it’d come with.

—–

It was about four months ago when Harry started being disloyal to Y/N. He’s a bit ashamed to say that the first time wasn’t even an accident, maybe it could be passed off as such, but really, it wasn’t. Harry and Y/N fought about something earlier that afternoon. He was suggesting a week off from their usual responsibilities and driving away to one of the lakeside homes that he had connections to rent. Unfortunately, Y/N’s midterm exams were coming up in about three weeks and she couldn’t waste any time not studying. She paid good money for an education that she’d have to teach herself and she was not going to waste her hard-work now that she’s almost finished.

“Harry, I understand that we need time together, but I have exams coming up soon and I can’t just not study for a whole entire week,” Y/N pleaded, she was trying to make him see things from her pupil perspective.

Harry scoffed, “All you do is study and read. Am I even important to you anymore?”

“You know you are. I’m just saying maybe we can spend time over the weekend instead,”

“I feel like I’m always your second choice. You have time to go on your study sessions with Alan, but you can’t spend any time with me?” Harry asked incredulously, gritting his teeth in boiling anger.

“What? We’re only studying, and I need to study. My education is just as important to me as your music is to you! Do you even hear yourself right now?”

Maybe if he wasn’t blinded by anger he would’ve realized that his words suggested that he didn’t trust her. But not right now, no, he was jealous and desperate to spend time with her that words flew out of his mouth without a second filter.

“You guys are spending an awful lot of time together recently..” His tone changes to one of mockery as if he really didn’t believe that Y/N could never do such a thing to Harry.

“I’m not cheating on you if that’s what you’re implying.” Y/N said dully. Honestly, how could she? She gave her her own heart for a reason.

“Maybe if you prioritized me first, I wouldn’t!”

“I can’t believe you’re acting like this. When you went away to shoot your movie, I was always in the back burner of your mind. I was lucky to even get a text from you because of how busy you were; this continued for months, Harry! Freaking months, and I supported you the whole time because I knew just how important it was to you,” Y/N ranted on about the emotions that she bottled up inside her, she rarely let her own needs become first because to her, Harry was more significant.

Harry’s mouth opened and closed like a goldfish, not knowing what to say after being hit by straight facts from his girlfriend. Things that he had no idea she felt. When he realized that he wasn’t going to speak, she continued on.

“When you were working on your album day and night, I was there for you! I brought lunch cause I knew that you’d forget to eat sometimes, and even dinner cause you’d stay up late overworking yourself,” She paused, “And when you had moments where you doubted yourself, saying shit like how you weren’t good enough or whatever you did wasn’t enough, I was by your side comforting when I could’ve been studying abroad for a month,”

“I didn’t ask you to stay,” Harry mumbled.

She blinked at him twice before shaking her head, “I wanted to. You are my number one. It doesn’t matter what happens, I’ll always put you first.”

Normally, Harry would hug her to smithereens and declare his love multiple times in her ear. But Angry Harry would rather debunk and defend himself more.

“I. Didn’t. Ask. You. To. Stay,” His tone punctuated with each word. “I could’ve been fine without you. You could’ve gone through your stupid exchange,”

“N-no you wouldn’t,” Y/N stuttered out, trying to believe her thoughts instead of Harry’s words. “If I wasn’t there, you wouldn’t have the courage to release your album. If I wasn’t there for you, you wouldn’t have been as confident as you are now,”

“And my ‘stupid exchange’? I worked my ass off for that,”

“Probably kissed arse too many times,” Harry whispered condescendingly to himself.

“Of course I worked hard for that. Opportunities like this just don’t get handed down to you,”

“It could be if you were—”

“If I was what? Finish that sentence, I dare you.”

They stared down each other. His eyes begging her not to make him say it while hers watered over. Harry’s eyes hardened, his mouth opening,

“If you were better”

“Better? If you want something better then why are you even with me?”

“You know wha’? You’re right. I could have any girl in the world, but I chose you.”

Y/N screams in frustration, hammering Harry with light punches to his chest, pushing him with as much force as she could, and he only took a step back.

“Leave. Get out! Find someone else to comfort you when you need it.”

She crashes on her knees, sobbing hard that she could feel the burn in her throat. She only looks up when the door slams shut. Harry left.

—–

Harry was inspired by the possibility of a broken heart. The crashing remnants of a relationship and the absurdity of loneliness, he wrote all that his head spilled out, thinking faster than his hand could write. Eventually, when the argument sunk deep in his bones, he stopped and leaned against the studio couch. Harry rubbed a palm across his face, wondering how he was gonna fix this. He basically suggested that she was a cheater and then belittled her education and abilities to achieve something; it can’t be any worse than that. Well, apparently it can.

As he was brainstorming ideas on how to plead for Y/N’s forgiveness, one of the soundboard technicians walks in. Her name is Irene. It wasn’t that hard to remember her since she was trying to butter up to him countless times. He always said no, though.

“Hey Mr. Styles, rough day?” Her hips swiveling exaggeratedly, obviously trying to catch his eyes. She sits down next to him, so close he could feel the heat of her body radiating off of her.

His phone buzzes in his hand, a message from ‘Y/N.’ He swipes to read the message,

“hey, im gonna go head out to the library for a while. I’ll be home late. Text me if you want me to buy you dinner. Sorry, H”

He smiles lightly, but it eventually fades. Even after he just insulted her, she was still willing to care for him and prioritize his needs instead of coming home earlier.

“Hi, it’s fine, be safe. Im sorry too,” He texts back swiftly.

Irene looks at him expectantly, as if demanding his attention.

“How are you, Mr. Styles,” She questions, leaning in closer.

“I’m grea--,”

*buzz buzz*

“Im going with alan btw”

Harry’s brows furrow in sudden anger. Alan? Him again? His fists clenched, his heart aching, but his body was burning with jealousy. He decides to leave her on ‘read’, locking his phone right away.

He clears his throat, “Yeah, pretty rough actually. What about you?”

“Better now that you’re here,” Irene’s eye drop down in a hefty wink. Her manicured hand now glossing over his outer thigh. He shifts.

“That’s uh-that’s great,”

“Problems with the missus, Mr. Styles?”

“I guess you could say that. But erm, Harry’s fine,”

She looks at him oddly, “Why are you talking about yourself in the third person,”

What the fuck? He thinks to himself.

“No, I meant you can call him Harry,”

She nods, “What seems to be the problem here? I can make you forget about her, you know,”

His head clouded and his eyes focused in on her lips, then her exposed cleavage, then to her eyes. The same piercing Y/E/C eyes that Y/N has.

Before he knew it, their lips were molding together. Smacking sounds filled the otherwise empty room. Their tongues lingered together while their hands roamed against the expanse of each others’ bodies. Was he allowed to do this? Of course not. So why was he doing it?

Soon enough she was sliding down his body, unto her knees between his legs. His jeans were pulled off and then he was naked. Her lips surrounding his thick shaft as he groaned in pleasure.

He returned the favour. That was when he wrote ‘Medicine’.

—–

As soon as Y/N and Harry entered the studio room on the sixteenth floor, the hustle and bustle stopped. Sarah stopped drumming her pen against her journal, Adam and Clare paused their conversation, Jeff was fixing something in the booth so he hadn’t noticed them enter. Mitch was just quiet, as usual.

“Y/N!” The band collectively shouted. It has been a while since she’s visited, they missed her very much.

Sarah invited her to sit down on the couch, pushing off her boyfriend to make space for Y/N. Clare and Sarah conversed with her, catching up on things they’d miss. All three girls were to busy with everything going on in their lives to properly talk and gossip with each other. Harry talks business with the guys, assuming since his laptop was opened and their faces looked far too serious to be banter.

A man walks into the room and Harry immediately shuffles to his feet. His head snaps towards Y/N, nodding her to stand up.

“Mr. Smith, this is Y/N. Y/N, Mr. Smith,” He introduces them to each other. Y/N’s heart calms a bit. So this is who he wanted me to meet.

It turns out, Mr. Smith wanted to meet the muse Harry had to write his banging songs recently. Although still in the process of being fine-tuned, he was impressed with Harry’s newfound ability to write seemingly hit after hit. After all, is said and done, Harry was ushered into the sound booth by Jeff to record some potential tracks. Mr. Smith had to leave to pick up his son. One by one, each member of the band took turns playing their instruments while Harry’s voice guided them. During Mitch’s turn, Harry blessed everyone with his angel-like voice.

“How are you and Harry doing?” Clare asks, curiosity laced in her tone.

“I second that question! Haven’t seen you guys together in a while, is everything okay?” Sarah raises her brow as if to say ‘you can tell us anything’

Just as Y/N was about to answer, the door opens again to reveal a woman. Y/N wouldn’t have paid mind to her like everyone else, except that he could hear Harry’s voice strain a little. In concern, she looks up to her boyfriend, finding his eyes focused on the woman who entered recently, captivated as it seems. Her eyes follow his and land on said woman. She does a double-take at her, trying to figure out where she had seen her face before.

“It’s going okay. We’re fine,”

Clare and Sarah share a look with each other, “Y/N, if something’s bothering you, you can tell us.” Y/N smiles at her friends appreciatively.

“H? Can you come with me for a bit? Need you to check in on something at the office,” Irene’s serene voice echoes through the microphone as she leans over to press a button on the control panel to transmit her voice through Harry’s headphones.

He nods instantaneously, disrupting the recording.

“Wha- Harry you can’t just leave in the middle of a recording!” Jeff dictates.

Harry shrugs, “She needs me,” He makes eye contact with her again, a suggestive look in his eyes. Irene bites her lips slowly.

Jeff sighs, waving him off. Instructing him to ‘come back quickly’. Mitch sets his guitar down on the stand. As if remembering that his girlfriend was here, Harry gives a smile to Y/N, which even she finds odd. He’s a lot stern with her these days; doesn’t smile very much.

Harry follows Irene out the door.

Fifteen minutes passed and Harry has still not returned yet. By now conversation has died down and Y/N scrolls through her phone. She receives a message from ‘UNKNOWN’.

“Aren’t you wondering where he is?”

“Attachment 1: Image”

Y/N waits for the photo to load and when it does, a sense of deja vu rushes through her body. A picture of a door was shown. Confused, she shows the picture to Clare and Sarah.

“Do you know where this is?”

They tell her that it’s the bathroom down the hall. Y/N has never walked this fast.

She hastily walks in the corridor, scared of what she’ll find. The door comes to view, her arms reach out to push the door open. And when it did, she swore that her heart dropped to her stomach.

Harry was thrusting into Irene swiftly, groaning at the pleasure he was receiving, both hands gripping her hips while his head buries itself on her neck. Both of their eyes were closed enjoying the intimacy in a public place.

Wait, Y/N thinks. She scrolls through the previous messages, holding up the phone to eye level before finding similarities in the woman on the screen and the woman currently being fucked by her boyfriend. They were the same person.

“Holy fuck,” Y/N says out loud. Apparently, Harry thinks that it was Irene since he replies with, “Yes baby, feels so good,”

“Okay, retry. What the fuck, Harry?”

The couple halts their actions, gasping and screeching once they see Y/N standing by the door holding it open. Y/N realize that the lack of barricade could expose Harry and potentially harm his reputation, so she closes it and immerses herself for what’s yet to come.

Even now, she cared for him.

Harry retrieves his pants up from his ankles, using his flannel to cover Irene’s exposed chest from Y/N’s view. The mirror was still foggy from their actions and her sweaty back.

“Y/N, it’s–”

“Not what it looks like? You have to be more original than that if you’re gonna cheat on me,” Y/N scoffs. Irene distressingly puts her clothes back on, shooting a glare at Y/N for probably ruining her orgasm. Y/N steps aside to let the ‘bitch’ go through, but not before seething at the girl, “Find someone single next,”

Once the door is shut again, Harry tries defending himself.

“She came onto me! I swear it was an accident, it didn’t–”

“Mean anything? Are you stupid? Did you slip and ‘accidentally’ land in her vagina? What the fuck,”

“S-she…”

“You know what? I’m done with you. I’m done being ignored by somebody who never once thought to put me first. After all this time, I thought you were slaughtering yourself with work, overworking yourself when really, you were busy fucking another woman!” Y/N’s eyes gloss over, but she did not dare let a tear slip past her waterline. He doesn’t deserve your tears.

“We were over a long time ago, you know that,” Harry said.

This twists the knife in Y/N’s chest. Over? They were never ‘over’.

“The fuck Styles? Are you high? We never broke up! We’re still, we’re still Y/N and Harry,” She really wishes they weren’t having this conversation in a bathroom, while Harry still had sex hair and no shirt.

He looks at her with intensity, “You should’ve known. We stopped being us a long time ago,”

Her breath hitches then and she quickly makes a decision to go against her values of never giving cheaters or liars a second chance.

“T-that’s not true. We can make this work, I’m willing to forgive you just please…” Y/N pleads.

He looks at her sympathetically, the only emotion he’s currently feeling right now–not guilt, shame or remorse.

“I love her, Y/N. She has my heart now. Not you,” He whispers the last part, almost not believing his words himself. Through years, he’d always thought that he’d spent the rest of his life with Y/N. Nevertheless, he should learn to change his vision of the future–with Irene.

“I guess you really did find someone better, huh?” Y/N wipes a rogue tear but remains strong. She may have considered forgiving him, but now his chances are zero; not like he’d care anyway.

“Yeah, I did. I’m sorry. I don’t feel the same anymore,”

“Well good for you! Thanks for breaking my heart and not telling me that we broke up. Asshole, I swear. Hope you made the right choice cause I know I won’t make the mistake of trusting you again,”

Harry rolled his eyes, he just wanted this conversation to be over. Frankly, it was getting a little chilly in the bathroom. “Yeah, sorry,”

Y/N swallowed a lump in her throat, realizing that this was probably the last conversation she’d ever hold with him.

“About my stuff, I’ll be out of your way soon enough. Have fun with your new flavour,”

“That’s what I hoped and gee thanks, have fun with yours too if you ever get over me,” Harry smirk at her menacingly.

She rolls her eyes, burning from the tears she held back. She remains strong.

“Don’t worry, I will.”

—–

Six months later, Y/N graduates university with her best friend and current boyfriend, Alan.

Irene gets a job as a music producer thanks to Harry’s fame, money, and connections.

Harry misses Y/N.

—–

well, that’s that

#harry styles #harrystyles #harry #styles #harry styles oneshot #harry styles oneshots #harry styles one shot #harry styles one shots #harry styles imagines #harry styles imagine #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #angst #writing #one direction #cheatin #harry styles cheating #a cheat

2K notes · View notes

sugar-petals · 5 years

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Sub!Taehyung A-Z

note: posts for all other members linked in m.list. 💚

⚠️ warnings: dom/sub dynamics, smut, bdsm

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Speechless, sweaty, internally still begging for so much more but realizing his body is already two steps ahead and worn out. A lot of cuddles and spooning will ground him. It’s a good idea to put on some soft music, Taehyung loves it.

b = body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Hair is a big deal. Yours, his. Definitely the prime area of interest.

c = cum (anything to do with cum basically… i’m a disgusting person)

A real Daegu man will always lap up his creampies. Now it doesn’t stop there, though. I think Taehyung might be down for some extremely messy experiments with fake cum.

d = dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Digs a lot more brutality than you think. You might wanna touch him with velvet gloves — even literally — 60% of the time, but then again, Taehyung has a sturdy build and wants bruises, mostly hickeys around the chest area.

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Taehyung is highly adventurous with all things sexual. He’s had his fair share of flings and experiments, he might unearth kink you’ve never even heard of to try out.

f = favourite position (this goes without saying.)

Cowgirl makes Taehyung’s world go round. Best with him on a leash so you can tug at his collar every now and then.

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

If Taehyung doesn’t make funny faces when you have sex, something clearly is wrong. Humor is his natural state.

h = hair (how well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

We’re not talking about the tullet here, are we? Anyway, a good trim here and there is Taehyung’s routine, and you might also get your chance at shaving him.

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

If you’re into that... he can be totally over the top with that.

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

The only question is, how secretive can he be with it.

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

Photography is the first one on the list. You might as well make a whole album with bondage shots of him.

l = location (favourite places to do the do)

Bathroom, although he’ll quickly realize water is not your friend for sex. However, it’s about the steamed windows and scented candles in the first place so that can be arranged without action in the tub.

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

A sense of novelty and connection. PDA gets him in the mood a lot.

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

No nipple clamps and the like, he’s a bit sensitive there. Which will be useful for other endeavors, however.

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Best on the receiving end and almost definitely even better overstimulated.

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

A reckless speed is good.

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

You’ll both end up being clumsy with it because hell, how many layers of clothing and designer-jewelry-that-mustn’t-be-stained-because-its-worth-half-a-million do you have to remove from him? That alone takes 5 fucking minutes!

r = risk (are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Sure, sure. Sneaking out to the beach at night and fucking around there is likely one of his favorite things. Your house and shower is full of sand, your shoes, your washing machine, too, but nothing really beats the atmosphere by the sea, so.

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Taehyung comes fast and he can’t help it. Lots of training for you to do, which appeals to both his and your creativity. Making him get rewards works best.

t = toy (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Maybe a myriad, maybe just one, he is unpredictable and he himself forgets all the hidden spots where he stored things for himself. In any case, the type to run out of lube fast.

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

Often too dreamy to bother, but then, unexpected surges in physical affection come your way. Does that count as teasing? He’s very good at that. Playing puppy in particular.

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make)

Not very prominent in terms of how loud he gets, his voice is way too deep for that.

w = wild card (get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Would totally enjoy chastity and anal hooks. Ring gags, too. Metal devices are something he has his eyes on for long.

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Trust Jimin when he says that Taehyung’s ass is exciting but what’s in the front is even more fun.

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

From languid to extreme peaks in energy, I don’t think you’ll ever be bored by routine. The downside is that it’s hard to say when sex is best, especially since your own drive has to be compatible, so you might need to observe a little whether his drive has a pattern to it.

z = zzz (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

What sleep? Tae won’t bat one single eyelid, even when aftercare is completed. He still likes to bask in your presence and you might be the first one to actually doze off.

602 notes · View notes

thesecondcircleofkel · 5 years

Text

NSFW Alphabet, Izuku A-Z

Reposting all of these together for convenience and to save space. Alphabet requests are still open, but remember, I don't accept requests to do the entire alphabet for someone all at once. You have to stick to the guidelines of 1 character per ask, and 5 letters per ask, and once I finish the alphabet for a character with requests like that, I will repost it all together.

A: Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

So cuddly. He’ll go and get you whatever you need afterwards, and he’ll be really quick about it because he wants to get back into bed and cuddle with you. He loves to lay his head on your chest and listen to your heartbeat as he falls asleep, so he’ll cuddle with you in any position that lets him do that.

B: Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

On himself, his hands, not just because he loves to give you pleasure with them, but also because the scars there are good reminders of what can happen if he’s not careful with his Quirk.

On you, he loves your entire body, and he will never neglect to show you that. He could lie in bed with you for hours, just running his hands over your body, telling you how beautiful you are and how you’re perfect in his eyes.

C: Cum (Anything to do with cum)

Regular consistency, a little excessive in amount, though. He’s not very picky on where he cums; he’ll be just as happy to cum inside you as he will to pull out and cum on you, although he does have a preference for cumming on your lower belly and thighs. He has got a pretty balanced diet, so the taste isn’t too terrible, and he is not above licking his own cum off of you, whether that’s via going down on you after he’s cum inside you, you making him clean his cum off of you while your dominating him, etc.

D: Dirty Secret

He has a huge album on his phone of all of the nudes that you’ve sent him over your relationship together. You’d think he’d be paranoid enough to delete them after a while, but nope, he’s kept them all, and he frequently goes back through them whenever he has some ‘personal time’. That album is definitely on lockdown, though, so don’t worry about anyone else finding it. He would also love to record the two of you having sex at least once, so if you let him do that, he’ll also have screenshots and clips of that video in the album.

E: Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

He doesn’t have a lot of experience, but on account of all the research he does, he knows what he’s doing. He’s also a fabulous listener, so just tell him what you like and he’ll do it. He’ll be sure to make note of it for later too, and whether that note will just be in his memory or in the notebook that he has dedicated to you, who knows.

F: Favorite Position

He loves it when you ride him, so positions like Cowgirl are right up his alley. He also loves the Crab variation of this position, since it gives him a great view of you and he can watch as his cock moves in and out of you.

He likes the Workout position because it lets him show off his strength, and when he wants to be really deep inside you and close to you, he generally goes to the Anvil position.

G: Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)

He doesn’t take himself too seriously, so if some funny mishap happens while the two of you are together, he’ll definitely laugh at it. He thinks that giggly sex is cute, too, but since his sense of humor is rather ‘unique’, he won’t try to make jokes in bed to get you to giggle. He will instead try to set up a situation beforehand that will have you laughing, like maybe watching a comedy program together, and he’ll take you to the bedroom afterwards while you’re still giggling at what you watched.

H: Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

The carpet matches the drapes, and it gets really bushy without any maintenance, so he’s stays on top of keeping it all trimmed up.

I: Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

He can be really intimate when he wants to, which is most of the time. He’s really big on eye contact and holding your hand during sex, and he will tell you several times how much he loves you as he’s buried balls deep inside of you.

J: Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

He has a really high sex drive, so he at least gets himself off 2-3 times a week, even if the two of you regularly have sex. He prefers to masturbate while laying out on the bed, in the hopes that you’ll walk in and catch him so you can help him out.

K: Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Izuku has got a major Praise Kink. He loves it when you start praising him during sex, and if you praise him for something outside of the bedroom, then it will very quickly lead to him dragging you off for a fast round or some very intense sex later on. He does not shy away from praising you, either, and he loves to rain the Body Worship down on you.

He loves it when you Dominate him, especially if you’re having a bad day and you feel powerless over something. He wants to make you feel better and give you that power back, and he doesn’t want you to hold back on him. Just don’t Degrade him; he’s not into that, but he does love it when you tease him with some Dirty Talk while you dominate him. He will insist that you tie him up, and if you’re a female, he’d love it if you pegged him. He also has a tendency to be a bit of a cumslut when he’s being dominated, so be sure you play into that. Edge him for a while, too, he loves it.

L: Location (Favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere around the house, but especially on the kitchen counter and the couch. He loves the idea that the two of you were so in need of each other that you couldn’t make it to the bedroom, plus he loves the way that you’re able to ride him as he sits back on the couch. He likes the kitchen counter mainly for its height, and he’s able to use it as leverage to angle himself and hit some fantastic spots inside of you.

M: Motivation (What turns them on)

You barely have to breathe on this boy and he’ll get horny. There’s more about that in the Y section, though.

There are some things that really get him going though, like lingerie and when you whisper something dirty in his ear in public (he’ll be so embarrassed, but also really turned on).

Compliments are another weakness of his, especially since he’s got a praise kink.

He also really likes it when you just straight up demand sex from him. He loves it when you take charge, and he’ll be stripped down in seconds, ready to meet your every command.

N: No (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He refuses to hurt you under any circumstance, and the mere mention of it immediately turns him off. He also can’t stand degradation, no matter which one of you is dishing it out.

O: Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He made it his life’s mission to be good at oral, and that was definitely a mission accomplished. He’s done research, taken notes, and practiced on fruit all in the effort to be able to drive you wild with his mouth, and he’ll go down on you as many times as he can for ‘further research’. In that vein, he prefers to give over receive, but just by a little bit. Seeing your mouth working his cock really drives him wild, and he will never turn you down when you offer him a blowjob. He absolutely loves any variation of the 69 position, as well.

P: Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He generally has a very moderate pace, and he’s very good at maintaining it, even when he’s getting close to his orgasm. He instead increases the strength behind his thrusts, and you’ll definitely end up with some bruises wherever his hips make contact with you.

Q: Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He’d prefer proper sex so he can take his time with you, but he’ll indulge in a quickie from time to time. It’s kind of a necessity with how high his sex drive is, but quickies in his Hero office or anywhere else close to public are pretty well off limits given how loud he is.

R: Risk (Are the game to experiment, do they take risks?)

He absolutely loves to experiment with you. He’ll try just about anything at least once, and if he liked what you tried overall but there were a few things about it that threw him off, he’ll make a few changes and try it again. He’s very accommodating, to say the least.

He can be a bit risky, but when it comes to actually doing something in a public or semi-public setting and there’s a chance you’ll get caught, he’s out. He does have a career to look out for, and he hates to think of what would happen to his heroic image if he got caught fooling around so brazenly in plain view.

S: Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

It might be his Quirk coming into play, but he has amazing stamina, and he will keep fucking you until your voice goes hoarse and then some. He only likes to go for one round since he doesn’t want to overwhelm you too badly, but he can go for more if you want him to.

T: Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He passed out the first time that he saw you using a toy on yourself. This green bean is a huge fan of toys; he’ll use them on you, let you use them on him, the whole nine yards. As embarrassed as he got that first time, he became very well accustomed to using toys after that, and he has done quite a bit of research trying to figure what the best toys to use are.

U: Unfair (How much they like to tease)

He doesn’t do a whole lot of teasing himself. He thinks it’s mean for him to tease you, but boy does he love it when you tease him instead. He will be a happy man if you decide to dominate him and edge him until he’s begging for you to let him cum. It may be a bit of a double standard, but he just doesn’t have it in him to deny you what you want.

V: Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He is so damn loud. Like, I hope you don’t live in an apartment, because your neighbors will hate you if that’s the case. He can’t hold it back, either. He’s a moaner, too, so there’s really no denying what the two of you are doing, either. He sounds amazing, though, and I used this line in some other headcanons that I made for him, but I’ll use it again here: his moans are so sweet that they could make an angel weep, so don’t try to cover them up.

W: Wild Card (Random headcanon)

Wants to watch someone else have sex with you. He claims it’s for scholarly purposes just so he can get some new ideas and techniques, but he really just likes to watch you getting fucked. If you’re really against this, then another option would be to videotape a session between the two of you so he can watch it later. If you are down for it, it will definitely be with somebody that the both of you trust. Just go ahead and suggest Bakugou to him, and his eyes will nearly pop out of his head. He is intrigued, to say the least, mainly because he knows that the two of them will be completely different in the bedroom. He is more than ready to observe those differences and take notes on them, and it will definitely give him some good memories to get off to later.

X: X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants)

Average length, but he is quite girthy. His dick is also pretty straight, with no obvious curves to it, and he’s got 2-3 prominent veins going along his shaft.

Y: Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

His sex drive is really, really high. He was hoping that it would go down once he got out of high school but jokes on him because it just got higher. And once he got into a relationship and started having regular sex? Yeah, his sex drive went through the roof. He will want to have sex with you every day of the week if he can, and more than once on some days. He’s honestly like a freakin’ bunny, and he does get embarrassed about it sometimes. He can definitely hold himself back, though.

Z: ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He doesn’t fall asleep right after since he likes to make sure that you’re taken care of and comfortable first. After that, he’ll lay his head on your chest and fall asleep to the sound of your heartbeat.

#midoriya izuku #bnha #bnha deku #bnha izuku #boku no hero academia #mha #my hero academia #bnha headcanons #mha headcanons #not so sfw alphabet #don't read in polite company

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