#i know village english that’s a little fucking interesting but it’s not like i have any INSIGHT i don’t KNOW anything!!!!

[arthur-r]

genuinely how does someone succeed in college when you’re so terrified of being incorrect or looking stupid that you can’t even say anything to begin with???? i was trying to go into this year brave and everything but i’ve already been laughed at multiple times by a class full of people older and scarier than me and i already feel like i’m being judged and underestimated for so many reasons that i don’t want to give anyone another reason to look at me that way. but it’s gotten to the point (in the less than one week that classes have been in session; maybe it’s always been at the point) where i’m failing to submit assignments because i know that my teacher is going to see it and think i’m stupid, and never listen to me again, and i’m going to lose all the credibility that i’m trying so desperately to hold onto. and i know from a logical standpoint that it’s the teacher’s job to meet people where they’re at and lift them up from there, but honestly is that much even true anymore?? isn’t college about figuring out who has what it takes and who is going to get left behind???? why did i enroll in fucking honors classes of course i can’t do this???? i’m really not feeling well and i stayed in tonight and missed dinner and i miss home and i miss being able to talk to my friends and not be actively ruining my future. i feel like i’m always good until i’m not, and i don’t realize i need help until i’m too far in and by the time i get it, i won’t need it anymore but i’ll have ruined everything back when things were worse. i’m isolating from my roommate (who hates me because he thinks i hate him) and losing every friend i’ve started to make at the same time as i’m losing all the real friendships that i already have. and my roommate is across the room right now as i’m quietly fucking crying. and i want to go home and i want to be safe. and why is everything so unfamiliar and simple and wretchedly complicated.

#im really not feeling well. i want to go home and im not used to that at all #i miss my little sister. i miss my teachers and i miss my friends. im not used to this #what prompted all of this: i was trying to do my linguistics homework and i made it about an hour in coming up with faulty hypotheses #and i realized that far of the way through. that the only dialects i’m fucking familiar with are all fucking variations of north central #‘whoa somebody talks similar in anchorage as they do in taylor’s falls?? it must signify a deep linguistic thread traceable over generations #they’re just both right next to fucking canada???? of course they fucking sound similar???? the fact that i don’t know anyone from the east #or the south and even the people i know in the west are still the same fucking thing we all talk the fucking same #i know village english that’s a little fucking interesting but it’s not like i have any INSIGHT i don’t KNOW anything!!!! #told my french teacher i’m learning latin he asked me if it’s fucking ecclesiastical because once you’re in college it’s just normal i guess #i just feel like. yes i’m here because some part of me stood out from my peers. but in this group of special people?? i’m nothing!!!! #so i’m really struggling. and i want a hug and i wish things were different. i want to be here but i don’t feel like i deserve it #and i’m not going to get anything done if i keep feeling like this #i dont know. i hope everyone is doing well. sorry for the extra stress it’s just really difficult and strange #i hope everyone has a good night - i’m heading to bed soon #me. my post. mine. #friends only #vent cw #delete later #and everyone here speaks fcuking MANDARIN or something and all of a sudden my five years of french feels fucking basic. #kids who have been in advanced programs since birth. the imposter syndrome is fucking PALPABLE!!!! i want to go home and i want to forget #okay i’m done. im done!!!! everything is fine. hope everyone is well

[fangirleaconmigo]

Abortion in The Witcher Books

Would anyone like to come along with me on a deep dive regarding abortion in The Witcher books? Not enough people talk about the fact that Geralt of Rivia is explicitly pro-choice and that the sorceresses are seen providing reproductive care, including abortion, on multiple occasions. So, let's do that.

There are a lot of things you can say about The Witcher books, feminism, misogyny, and the male gaze. (I am considering doing my first video on this very topic. It is complicated. This is not a 'the books are perfect' post) But one thing we can never say is that they are wishy washy about bodily autonomy, and more specifically, abortion. (In fact, that is the entire point of Ciri and Geralt's arc, which I will get to at the end of the post)

This topic came up awhile back because a 'witcher school' was closed after the owners were found to have ties to far right organizations, including anti-abortion organizations. So, I did a little thread on twitter about it, wondering how you can call yourself a Witcher fan (to the extent that you license a fan activity business!), and miss the entire fucking point. It was my most popular (and ofc hated by others) tweet ever, which was interesting, but I was mostly surprised that so many people were shocked to learn that Geralt of Rivia is, as a character, canonically, verbally, explicitly pro-abortion rights.

So I’m going to put the info here too in case any of you here find it interesting. Obviously there will be spoilers for the books.

TW: discussion of sexual assault, pregnancy, and basically anything having to do with reproductive health.

Before I start, I want to say that the book refers to abortion in reference to rights for women throughout, so that is the language in this article. I want to be clear that I (as an individual) understand that abortion is relevant to other genders and that I support it for trans men, non binary people, literally anyone. Abortion should be safe and on demand for all. But this is not a post analyzing my views on abortion, but the appearance of abortion in fictional psuedo medieval-esque fantasy world of The Witcher books.

Ok, I’ll start with the fact that sorceresses provide reproductive care in the books, including abortions.

In, The Last Wish (p210) Geralt tries to give Nenneke money to help Yen with fertility treatments. (In the books he does not mock her desire to have a child) He knows Yen wants to be a mother, and he wants to help. Nenneke replies that she does not need his money, and that providing abortions pays a hell of a lot better than witchering.

"You're more of an idiot than I thought." Nenneke picked up the basket from the ground. "A costly treatment? Help? Geralt, these jewels of yours are, to her, knickknacks not worth spitting on. Do you know how much Yennefer can earn for getting rid of an unwanted pregnancy for a great lady?"

Witches as providers of abortion is a very common trope in fantasy fiction for a very good reason. In order to stamp out paganism and polytheism, European colonists vilified the village wise woman as a murderer of children, hence the 'boil them in a pot, stuff them in the oven' stories about witches. Many people interpret this as the vilification of abortion. In the classic 1972 feminist text Witches, Midwives, and Nurses: A History of Women Healers, Ehrenreich and English quote Malleus Maleficarum, the witch hunting manual written by Catholic clergymen in 1487, to show that women providing reproductive healthcare was one of the 'characteristics' of a witch.

The witch that provides reproductive healthcare fits in very well in the witcher world, where Geralt and the witchers are embodiments of the working class who are used as tools and exploited. They are loathed until they are needed. The same is true of abortion providers. They are hated until they are needed, and they are always needed.

It also fits in well with the themes of class. In the Witcher books, it is stated multiple times that it is upper class women who are accessing this care from sorceresses. That is real. It is the truth that outlawing something very very often only means outlawing it for the poor and working class. The wealthy always find a way.

In Season of Storms, the sorceress Coral and her assistant Mozaïk provide reproductive healthcare to "wealthy, upper-class ladies" on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays. Geralt comes to speak to Coral in chapter sixteen and both of the women are wearing white doctor coats. They have just helped a woman deliver a baby and it is implied that the baby died and they are both upset. They do not want Geralt there, because (it seems to me) they need space to grieve, and they do not expect him to understand. They send send him away, suggesting he go spend time with Dandelion.

She walked over and kissed him on the cheek without a word. Her lips were cold. And she had dark circles under her eyes.

She smelled of medicine. And the fluid she used as disinfectant. It was a nasty, morbid scent. A scent full of fear.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she forestalled him...She looked at him and it was a faraway look, from beyond a chasm of time and events between them. He needed a few seconds to understand how deep that chasm was and how remote were the events separating them.

"Maybe the day after tomorrow would be better. Go to town. Meet that poet, he's been worried about you. But now go, please. I have to see a patient."

After she had gone, he glanced at Mozaïk....

"We had a birth this morning," she said, and her voice was a little different. "A difficult one. She decided to use forceps. And everything that could have gone badly did."

"I understand."

"I doubt it."

"Goodbye Mozaïk."

There are multiple other references to abortion in relation to sorceresses; I won't quote them all. But I'll leave you with one other reference. In Lady of the Lake (pp114), in a very funny moment, Angoulême says she has a 'small problem' and Fringilla replies:

"I understand," nodded the sorceress. "It's nothing dreadful. When was your last period?"

Angoulême is rather put out at the thought of being pregnant.

"What do you mean?" Angoulême leaped to her feet, frightening the chickens. "It's nothing of the sort. It's something completely different!"

So, sorceresses provide abortions and other reproductive care.

But what about the men? What about the heroes?

Well, several of the male protagonists state explicitly in no uncertain terms that abortion is an inalienable, sacred right. That includes Geralt himself.

Here is Geralt taking to Queen Calanthe in Sword of Destiny (p345). She asks him whether he hates his mother. In the course of his answer, Geralt says that abortion is “a choice which should be respected, for it is the holy and irrefutable right of every woman.”

"A choice. A choice which should be respected, for it is the holy and irrefutable right of every woman."

That’s a strong goddamn statement. There’s no doubting his meaning or the strength of his conviction. And it isn’t just Geralt. Dandelion (Jaskier), Cahir (he is traveling with Geralt as part of the hansa in the books, please set aside anything you think you know about him from TWN), and Regis (Geralts dear friend) all explicitly support abortion rights, quite passionately.

In Baptism of Fire (p317), one of Geralt’s dear friends (my favorite, the love of my life, Milva) shares that she is pregnant. They are on a brutal journey through a war zone looking for Ciri. So it’s complicated. Another friend, barber surgeon vampire Regis has prepared an elixir for her to induce an abortion. So, not only do sorceresses provide abortions, but so do vampire barber surgeons, one of the most lovable heroic characters in the books.

But before he administers it, Regis gathers the rest of the company. Regis knows Milva feels like shit at the prospect of burdening them, so he is worried that she is making the decision under duress. They don’t immediately understand why he is bringing the matter to them.

At first they think he is asking for opinions on whether she should get an abortion. They are baffled. Cahir answers first. He says in Nilfgaard it is always a woman’s right to choose.

"In Nilfgaard," Cahir said, blushing and lowering his head, "the woman decides. No one has the right to influence her decision. Regis said that Milva is certain she wants the medicament. Only for that reason, absolutely only for that reason, have I begun-in spite of myself-to think of it as an established fact. And to think about the consequences. But I'm a foreigner, who doesn't know...I ought not to get involved. I apologize."

So, Cahir says that maybe it’s a foreigner thing. Maybe it’s different for them. Dandelion (Jaskier) is offended and outraged by the implication that they believe any differently.

"What for?" the troubadour asked, surprised. "Do you think we're savages, Nilfgaardian? Primitive tribes, obeying some sort of shamanic taboo? It's obvious that only the woman can make a decision like that. It's her inalienable right. If Milva decides to--"

At this point, Geralt cuts Dandelion off. Geralt alone actually understands that there is something else happening here, that they are misunderstanding Regis and further questions are in order. Geralt begs Dandelion to stfu, which the bard misinterprets. He thinks Geralt is disagreeing with him and is considering opposing Milva's right to choose. Dandelion LOSES HIS TEMPER at the thought that Geralt would deny Milva her right.

Geralt becomes even more irritated and angry at the implication that he would do such a thing.

So, not only do we have witches as abortionists in The Witcher books, we have men, the hero (Geralt) his best friend (Dandelion), my beloved Regis, and Cahir say explicitly that abortion is an inalienable right.

And that should be no surprise.

Bodily autonomy and reproductive rights is at the very heart of the story. You do not have The Witcher story without it. It drives the narrative, the conflict, and Geralt and Yen's character arcs.

There is a criticism I see floating around quite a bit, that having Yen's story driven by her desire to be a mom and to physically reproduce is anti-feminist, or at least a tired reductive trope of women being defined by their maternal instincts.

I get that. I get tired of womanhood being defined by reproduction and motherhood as well. Biological essentialism when it comes to gender is exhausting and regressive. However, in this context, it is entirely clear to me that the point is NOT that all women should want to be pregnant. The point is the bodily autonomy, to be pregnant if you want to, and to not be pregnant if you don't want to.

Look at Ciri. She essentially becomes the main character by the end, and the idea of being pregnant repulses her.

So, in Lady of the Lake, Ciri is being held captive by elves, who want to do the same thing to her that everyone else does--breed her. The deal they offer her is, she does not 'have' to have sex with anyone until she is impregnated, but if she doesn't, she can't leave. (So, if she is to access what every human wants--freedom--she has to. This is still rape. It is coerced sex) She is understandably distraught and enraged. The part of that deal she seems most disgusted by, is the idea that she could be pregnant.

"But I don't want to!" yelled Ciri so loudly that the mare skittered beneath her. "I don't want to, understand? I don't want to! The thought of a bloody parasite being implanted in me is sickening. I feel nauseous when I think the parasite will grow inside me, that--"

She broke off, seeing the faces of the elf-women.

So yes, she is distraught that her bodily autonomy is being taken from her yet again. But perhaps the most upsetting part is the idea that she could be pregnant. It physically repulses her.

Now. Let's put this in context.

In this psuedo-medieval-esque setting with royal families, being used as a brood mare is COMMON and ACCEPTED. IN FACT, Calanthe, Ciri's OWN GRANDMOTHER was marrying her off against her will, betrothing her as a child. No one thought this was weird. It's your duty, right? No big deal. Even Geralt, when he first met Ciri, thought it would be a better life for her. Sure, it's against her will. But it's physically safe and luxurious. And he leaves her behind in Brokilon.

But at some point, Geralt puts two and two together. He connects his trauma with hers. He makes a decision that even if almost no one around him in his culture or on the continent, sees the importance of her bodily autonomy or agrees with him, he's protecting her. Not just against death, but against anyone taking her choice from her. When he is having a mental breakdown in Brokilon, worried about her, he tells Dandelion that he is trying to protect her from what happened to him. He doesn't say, she can't die. Or I can't let her be killed. He says she cannot be alone. She cannot go through what I went through. Here, I"ll let him say it: (Time of Contempt, p240)

"Listen to what?" shouted the Witcher, before his voice suddenly faltered. "I can't leave---I can't just leave her to her fate. She's completely alone...She cannot be left alone, Dandelion. You'll never understand that. No one will ever understand that, but I know. If she remains alone, the same thing will happen to her as once happened to me...You'll never understand that..."

"I do understand. Which is why I'm coming with you."

Honestly, I tear up thinking about it.

And Yen, well, she has a similar arc.

Yen has been abused and used as a tool, and along the way she has accepted that this is the way things are. Yen has even done the same to others. But she looked into that little face, those wide green eyes, and at some point she also connected the dots. There's another way of doing things, and maybe it is possible for a little girl to choose for herself. And even if it isn't possible, maybe the important thing is to fight for it. Maybe Yen can give her whole life to let a child just be a child.

Yen goes through torture and imprisonment for Ciri. She shoots lightning at a god, she shouts at a goddess, she drops through a portal into the sea, she gives up every last shred of political power she has spend ninety years accruing, she WILLINGLY tries to give her own life MULTIPLES TIMES, to save Ciri.

And from what? Death? Not always. At the heart of all this sacrifice is that Yen has made a decision that Ciri gets be a human who is given the dignity and respect of deciding what to do with her own body. To be a kid, not a tool. To be a person. To be free.

So Ciri gets to say, actually, for me, the idea of pregnancy is terrifying and repulsive and therefore, I don't want to do it.

In the end, Geralt, a person whose body was tortured and experimented on before he was too young to consent, and Yen, a woman who was abused and used, and BOTH of whom had their reproductive rights taken from them, decide to love Ciri and protect her bodily autonomy at any and all costs.

That is what drives the story. It drives the narrative. It drives both Geralt and Yen's character arcs. It is, in fact, the entire point.

So it should not be a surprise that abortion, and the right to have an abortion if necessary, is an inextricable part of The Witcher world. No, you cannot analyze these books and find 'perfect politics'. They are not politically correct. And there are many parts I can critique. I mean, we can critique anything. (and I do)

But I find it endlessly interesting that people who are conservative or right wing think that this property 'belongs' to them, and they want to push everyone else out, when all they have to do is pay the most minimal amount of attention and have really only two (2) brain cells to rub together, to see that they are indeed, incorrect.

#the witcher #the witcher books #thinking about the witcher books yet again #thinking about geralt of rivia yet again #thinking about yennefer of vengerberg yet again #thinking about ciri yet again #feminism #abortion

[octuscle]

My latino boyfriend is always making fun of me about how uncultured I am and I'll admit, I come from a pretty basic white family. But while my boyfriend seems playful about it, I think his family judges me a lot for it. And from the little spanish I know, I could pick up that they don't really seem to like me too much. So I was pretty surprised when his mother invited me to their family gathering. But when I got there, my boyfriend wasn't there, but everyone has been treating me really nice- saying I'll fit right into the family. Seems odd to me though, maybe I misread them?

Even though everyone is very nice to you, you feel extremely uncomfortable. Yes, compared to your friend's family, pretty much everyone is uncultured. The townhouse looks like it was just photographed in Architectural Digest. Whereas your friend's Argentine mother would never allow such vulgarity. Incredibly, the family is only here a few weeks a year…. But such a luxury….

They all speak English as if they were born in Oxford. Okay, most of them studied there. But as soon as they want you to miss something, they immediately switch to French. That you understand and speak a little Spanish, they have already noticed. The risk that you could understand them when they speak Spanish is too great.

The mother asks you to take a seat at the coffee table. You sit down and take a cupcake. The butler asks you what he can bring you to drink. You actually want to say, "A tea, please". But without being able to control it, you reply, "A beer, mate." What the hell was that? You didn't say that. You look around in fear. But instead of looking reprimanded, everyone smiles at each other in satisfaction. Fuck, how are you sitting here at the table? You've slid down with your legs wide apart and are lying on the Louis Quinze sofa more than you're sitting. The butler brings a bottle of beer and a crystal glass. You take the bottle, drink a big gulp and burp. "Hehehe, that was a good one" you say laughing with your mouth full after eating half a cupcake in one sitting.

"Tell me Steven, are you a native of London?" asks your friend's brother. "You be' your ass, pal," comes out of your mouth. "Bawn an' raised in Tottenham. An' call me Steve, mate" Fuck, you're from a village in Sussex. Why would you say something like that? "Interesting. But tell me Steve, how do you know my son?" asks the father. You'd like to say that he should actually know that you two play soccer together. But instead you say that you take care of the lawn mowing and stuff like that on their son's soccer team. "How interesting, we are looking for a new gardener for our house in the country. Would you be interested?" "You bet I would, ma'am. Anything's better than this crappy job. I'm getting sick and tired of this damn town, too." The brother of the guy who plays in the soccer club pulls out a piece of paper. "Here's our proposal. Could you start tomorrow?". All you see is the salary. Fuck, that's a lot of fucking money for a little lawn mowing and weeding. You don't think twice and sign it with your scrawly handwriting.

Can you remember that yesterday you were 22 years old, a hard-working student and a promising soccer player? Now you're tending the vegetable garden in a run-down country house in the middle of nowhere. None of the staff has ever seen the gentry here. And somehow no one here can really remember what they did before they started working here as a game warden, mechanic or janitor. Fuck, never mind. All hot men here with an irrepressible urge for hard, good and honest sex. Whatever you were doing before you came here, it must have been worse by far.

#male tf #muscle tf #reality change #muscle transformation #male transformation #age progression #revange tf

[i-am-vita]

OPLA hot older guys headcanons

Yesterday was the longest working day I've had in a while and my brain decided to affect my concentration and performance by hyperfixated in one thing only: THE AMOUNT OF HOT OLDER GUYS IN OPLA.

(The highlight of the day being @fanaticsnail based her new Mihawk fic on the dream I had the other day. I can´t still thank you enough! ToT)

So now my brain won't let me live in peace without getting these reader-headcanons into the internet in a kind of kill, marry, kiss way but instead we kiss all of them at one point of our life.

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👉 Masterlist, More here.

Warning: mention of sex, drinking and general horny thoughts (?) Probably very bad written since english is not my first language XD

.

So you, my gentle readers, are a semiretired white collar thief, former first mate of the misterious Phantom Pirates, who had to go into hidding to take care of your little niece after your older sister and her marine husband died in a shipwreck 8 years ago.

You're pretty set in giving your niece a comfortable and peacefull life, like her parents had, but she may have other ideas and be more like yourself than her own mother, because at 18yo she escaped home while you was visiting a neighbour island for business.

Now you're on full mama goose mode, searching for your duckling for the East Blue. And may reaquaint with some interesting men of your past.

Lets get a look at them ;)

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Mihawk

Current (VERY) interested. Doesn't know if he wants to behead you or fuck you.

You met during a heist at a marine's party going very bad a year ago. Your crew weren't aware of his attendance to the party (the man hardly attends his own warlord reunions), so you had to make a last minute distraction or you would've been discovered. So distracting Dracule Mihawk by heavy flirting with him and stealing his golden cross-knife was the best you could came up with.

You're an excellent knife wielder but your price habilities are in the infiltrate area so slipping away is kind of your thing. Nobody can keep up with you. Except a very pissed off warlord.

After an action packed chase, filled with you getting under his skin and him almost getting you more times than you're comfortable remembering, you considered it was enough time for the crew to had escape the party, so you released his cross and got the hell out of there leaving a very crossed (hah) Mihawk.

Since you semiretired 8ya, you pulled a job with your old crew from time to time and just if it was a very big score, but your reputation precedes you, and Mihawk managed to connect you with the infamous Phantom Pirates with many other thefts along the Grand Line and even inside Marine Bases in all the Blues.

The thing about the Phantom Pirates is that nobody knows who they are or how they look like. Your captain just known as a white masked man, no name but "Captain of the Phantom Pirates" 150,000,000. Your own wanted posters without photo but a ? and the epitet "The Ghost Rose" 80,000,000. Until now. Mihawk saw enough of you to recognize you if he sees you again but decides against informing the government.

You're his to find and deal with ;)

Kuro

The controlling and toxic angry ex we all should have for drama.

You met during your golden years as a first officer of the Phantoms, your crew and his having a brief alliance to work together several times.

You thought you were perfect for each other, both loving your plans and having similar habilities with knives and speed, but his controlling, manipulating, perfectionist and literal bloody tendencies sour the deal pretty soon.

He didn't see you as an equal but another pawn for his plans, apparently the only one good enough by his standards, but still a pawn. So you dumped his presumptuous ass and sailed away to never see each other again.

You didn't feel a little sorry after hearing of his passing.

.

Now you have tracked your niece to Syrup Village, the home of some old friends of her parents and whose daughter, Kaya, had keep in contact with through the years but haven't seen since before her own parents passed away.

There you came to know that indeed your niece arrived the day prior just in time for her friend's 18th birthday and, after a very eventfull night, she sailed away with a group of Kaya's new friends and saviors that same morning in a new vessel with a ram's head.

The fact they got acquainted with Kuro himself, who turned to be alive and posing as Kaya's buttler for 3 years, paled in comparison to discover this little group has a boy captain set to sail the Grand Line to find the One Piece. And if the witness of the shipyard got it right, already has a big ass marine ship tailing them.

Judging by their route, they were heading to the Sambas Region and there's only one place to dock there...

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Bogard

The what-migh-have-been if he wasn't such a workaholic and you hadn't run away from home.

You met back in your previous life when you were a young debutante set by your parents to settle with a respectable marine husband, like your big sister.

He was just promoted to Garp's right hand despite his youth. Being one of the youngest officers with a promising career.

You were indeed charmed by him, but found yourself suffocating by the idea of a future like your sister's. Even after he confessed his plans of sailing the world and not being opposed to his future wife to be a marine too with him.

You did wanted a life of adventure and liberty, but not as a marine. You rejected his proposal and dissapeared days after. Your family came up with the story of you leaving to be an artist and study with the masters in the continent.

Truly nobody had a clue of you for years until you showed up after hearing of your sister's death to take care of your niece, looking like a well put together and wealthy art dealer.

Shanks

The one you ran away with to a life of piracy.

Days after rejecting Bogard and be sent by your parents to some "vacation" to think better of your life choices, you went to hide from your chaperones in a shaddy bar, full of young confidence that you could deal with it.

Plot twist: you did not. You found yourself in the universal female experience of dealing with guys not accepting a no for an answer and had to be rescued by a charming redhead in a straw hat whom you ran away with that same night after you both stole everything you could from those assholes ship and your chaperone's.

After burning out the initial passion, you and Shanks decided that maybe were better as friends, but still sailed together for a while, you learning everything about pirate life from him until you crossed paths with the Phantom Pirates. Captain Erik, being really impressed by you and your knowledge of the upper society, offered you a place in his crew, which you accepted, and kept training you.

Shanks and you remained good friends over the years, even assisting to his legendary drink parties from time to time. Your crew never having any reason to being enemies and even helping his if they needed intel on something.

Didn't expect to be precisely him to give you "parental advice" after you went looking for him when hearing he was in a nearby island, now minus an arm, and confessed you were semi-retired with a child to take care.

No, the child wasn't from him! Why would his crew would thing that?

Buggy

IT-WAS-JUST-ONE-TIME!!!!

But your stupid crew'd never let you live down that.

Surprinsingly, your Captain Erik and Captain Buggy turned to be very good friends. Both with a flair for dramatics and love for certain aesthetics, but yours being happy with working in the shadows, which suited Buggy perfectly.

Every time your crews crossed paths, it was a full carnival for days. And it was in one of those that it happened.

Even if you like and hold very well your alcohol, that time you were really wasted, having just broke up with Kuro. There was no way you'd had jump the clown's bones otherwise. You had standards!

But who'd have thought that the mad jester was such a charmer while drunk? Whispering dirty while still sweet poetry to your ears. Had his eyes always been so pretty? And those arms looked like they might hold you up without effort...

You woke up in his tent with the worst hangover of your life, naked and with a surprinsingly good recollection of the night before.

Of course you took your clothes and ran away to hide in your quarters for the rest of the day.

Fortunately, Buggy hadn't such a detailed memory of the night prior and assumed he passed it with one of the hired women from the local brothel whom the crew invited to the party.

But of course, your captain saw you leaving Buggy's tent and wouldn't stop teasing you for the rest of your life.

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That's it, my gentle readers. The headcanons for today and I'm already regreting it because my head is full of more ideas than ever and my job performance so down that I'm considering just dig its grave XD

👉 More here.

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#one piece #one piece live action #opla #opla x reader #opla buggy #opla mihawk #opla kuro #opla bogart #opla shanks #x reader #reader insert #fem reader

[theblueflower05]

Okay, english is not my mother language but I'm gonna do my best.

It would be amazing if you made a story where tsireya and reader are a couple but they seem like best friends, so when the sullys arrive to the metkayina clan (let's say they are older than in the movie) lo'ak has a crush on Tsireya. Reader helps Tsireya teach the sullys the shape of water and lo'ak always tries to flirt with Tsireya. Until one day, Lo'ak takes a walk on the beach where he knows there are no people and he finds Tsireya and reader making love to each other. It would be great if you made Tsireya call reader mommy but I'll leave this to you.

The explanation came out quite long, I hope it is not too much to ask :)

Okay but this is the most juicy scrumptious ask I’ve ever gotten and I hope you know it made me literally clench around nothing. It’s just too good.

Thanks for giving me an excuse to write some Subby!Tsireya smut. I’m gonna go change my panties now.

Smut under the cut

You and Tsireya’s relationship still new and fresh and blossoming.

Most in the village think your just friends, the shy nature of your touches and hugs appearing like no more then girlhood friendship. They don’t need to know what the two of you get up to in your private time- you’re not a fan of PDA and Tsireya respects that.

The Sully’s arrive just after your three month anniversary.

You’re hesitant of new people, not cruel or interested in being nasty and joining in on the teasing. But nervous. Introverted and a tad bit wary.

She’s everything your not, kind and out going. Her aura sparkles, powder pink and glittery. She’s soft and welcoming, she’ll make an amazing T’sahik.

When she ropes you into helping train the newcomers, of course you can’t say no. When have you ever been able to say no to those giant eyes?

“They had to leave their home, could you even imagine that? It breaks my heart. We must help them adjust”

And she’s right of course.

The more that you get to know the Sully’s, the more your heart hurts for them. Being so forcibly uprooted from everything they’d ever known is horrific.

You “mother hen” people. It had always been known about you. The moment you take someone under your wing, there’s little you wouldn’t do for them.

You like the Sully siblings. Bond with them. Would even say you’ve become friends with them-

All except for one.

You can’t stand Lo’ak.

Toruk Makto’s youngest son grates at your last nerve. He’s brash and annoying-

And he won’t stop flirting with Tsireya.

It makes you see red. Makes your heart pound and your fists clench, everytime he whispers sweet nothings to her. Or stares at her with that love struck expression on his stupid face.

Tsireya doesn’t reciprocate, is respectful of her already established relationship but-

She’s just too fucking nice.

You tell her of the fact as you throw fits about it.

She’s yours. How dare this five fingered outsider come in and disrespect what you had?

“Y/n” she sighs as the two of you sit close together, the beach vacant. Only the ocean, lapping rhythmically at the shore, is there to bare witness to your vulnerability.

You’d been crying, your turquoise eyes red rimmed and your plush lips set into a tight frown.

Your knees are pulled up to your chest and you refuse to meet your girlfriends pleading gaze.

“It meant nothing, I was only teaching him to free dive” Tsireya vows before reaching out to you. Her soft hand on your shoulder as she urges you gently to look at her. “I only want to be with you. My heart beats for you, it belongs to you. Is that not enough?”

You huff, shaking your head “You let him hold your hand today!”

“He was drowning! He needed my help!“ she protests.

She’s too kind for her own good, for yours either. You’d seen the look on his face while their fingers intertwined.

It made you sick with jealousy. Twisted with unbridled rage.

“You…are kind, my sweet love. Too kind. But you’re not stupid. Don’t pretend that you don’t see the way that he looks at you” you hiss at her, avoiding her touch. So upset that it curdles in your stomach like something vile.

She sniffles. Tsireyas an emotional creature by nature. Having you this upset with her has her close to spiraling.

“What do you want me to do? I won’t train him anymore, if you don’t want me to. Please, Y/N. Don’t be upset with me” she warbles out, her big bottom lip quivering.

She’d do anything to melt this icy coldness that you were settling over the relationship she so deeply cherished.

“I want you to tell him your mine” you state with finality and she’s nodding before you can even finish.

“Yes, yes of course” she agrees. “I’ll tell him we’re dating. I’ll make that clear”

“No Tsireya. Not that we’re dating” you hiss at her, seething at her naivety “Tell him that your mine”

“Anything” she whimpers. She’d tell him anything you wanted her to.

You sigh and reach over. Grabbing her dimpled chin gently, your fingers firm on her jaw “He wants to fuck you, you know”

She blushes, cheeks going hot and rosy. Tries to shake her head, but your grip just gets that much firmer.

“He does” you continue, your bold gaze piercing. She can’t look away from your sparkling light green eyes as you speak “You’re going to tell him that you don’t need his cock. That you spend every night with me, fully satisfied. I treat you well so well”

She nods eagerly. “Of cour-“ you squeeze her so hard it hurts. It has her whimpering, tears gathering in her thick lash line.

“No, that wasn’t really a question, was it? I know I take care good of you, Tsireya. Anything you want, I give you. I’d rip out my fucking heart for you if you asked me to” your words are intense, laced with desperation. You’re quickly losing your composure- completely raw as you sink into how much you feel for her.

It’s obsessive. Not completely healthy.

Too much for most people-

Not for Tsireya.

Tsireya thrives on emotional energy.

She is already starting to squirm. She loves you when you get like this. She’s spoiled rotten, she wants all of your attention all of the time.

“Mhmm” she can only agree, her jaw aching in your hands.

“Who’s are you?” It’s a little bit of a taunt- meaner then you’d like to be but you’d been pushed here. Pushed to this emotional state.

“Yours, mommy” Tsireya whines, cheeks still squished in your grip. Lips pursed and pouting.

You slam your mouth to hers. That’s all you needed to hear.

————————————————————————-

Lo’ak has never felt like this.

There’d been girls back home in the forest, one’s that caught his eye. One’s that he’d pursued.

But there had never been a girl like Tsireya.

What had started as an innocent crush had bloomed into something- more. Something all consuming.

He thought about her before he went to sleep at night, and then again as the rays from the morning eclipse filled his family’s Mauri.

Her pretty face. Her sweet laugh. Her kindness.

It was all too much for him. No one had ever been this nice to him before, how was he not supposed to completely fall head over heels for her?

Tsireya likes him back. He knows it. She’s always willing to be an ear when he needs to vent. She never makes fun of his five fingers or tawtute eyebrows. She laughs at all his jokes!

And most of all. She spends all her free time teaching him the way of water.

There’s no way she doesn’t like him. He’s sure of it. Gloats about it to his siblings-

“Maybe she’s just that nice? Ever think about that, skxwng? I bet she’d tutor anyone who needed it”

Kiri was wrong. She just didn’t understand. The seeds of doubt she tried to plant weren’t gonna stick.

He’d show them.

He’d be brave and tell Tsireya about his love for her, and she’d accept it with warm arms.

Lo’ak is sure of it.

So he musters up all his courage and sets out to find the Metkayina girl.

Some of the villagers said they’d seen her head out- she was going to forage for a particular type of seaweed. It only grew on the South Beach- other side of the island, furthest from the village.

That’s fine. He doesn’t mind the trek. He uses it to try to calm his fraying nerves. Imagines all the ways that the scene is going to play out.

Tsireya is quite emotional. She might cry at his confession. She’ll launch herself into his open arms- she’ll need to be consoled. Lo’ak will hold her tight. Kiss her until she has nothing to be ready about any longer

He walks and walks and hell. Where the fuck is she?

South Beach is desolate. Completely barren of other villagers. No Tsireya.

There’s a large rock formation- tall and acting like a barrier. Maybe she’s behind there, she has to be. He’s making his way over, just about to call out her name when a high pitched feminine moan rings out.

Breaking the silence of the deserted beach.

His golden eyes widen, tail going ramrod straight in alert because what? That can’t be-

Another moan- this one’s different. It sounds gutted, almost pained.

“Y/N- pleaseeeeee”

His cheeks are hot and his hearts pounding in his chest as he creeps over, following the sounds. Crouching behind the big rock formation, unseen as he peers through a crack.

What he gets a clear view of takes his breath okay. Makes him freeze in total and complete shock.

Tsireya is on her hands and knees, bare as the day she was born. Her pretty shell top and gauzy tweng have been discarded and lie tangled in the sand.

Her breasts are naked, nipples peaked. Her hair is a complete mess. The usual meticulously styled tendrils are everywhere, sticking to her sweaty face. Swaying with her body.

“Ah-ah-ah PLEASE” she screeches, as she thrusts back into your fingers.

You’re behind her, naked too. Ethereal in the setting eclipse. You weren’t really his type. Too bitchy, too gorgeous for your own good-

But as he watches you fuck Tsireya hard with with your hand he can’t help but acknowledge your beauty.

There’s a scowl on your face and your blue eyes sparkle as you work the girl infront of you over.

“You’re being so-ah- so mean” Tsireya wails and she sounds like she’s in pain.

But Lo’ak can tell she likes it.

Her ears are swiveling on her head, her thick tail wagging. And a small smile tugs on her pleasure slackened mouth.

“You’ve been a bad girl. Bad girls don’t get to come” you snipe back and oh holy shit.

Loak is so confused as he hides there behind the rocks. So confused and so turned on.

How long had this been going on?

We’re the two of you like- together? He just thought you guys were close friends. Is this why you were always glaring at him?

“I told you I’m sorry” Tsireya sniffles- her hips still swiveling backwards, needing the pleasure of your touch. He wishes he could see your hand, see how many fingers you had pressed into the younger girl. “I’m so sorry, mommy. I’m only yours. I love you. I love you. I love you”

Lo’aks brain kind of sort circuits.

His ears ring and his hard on deflates.

Tsireya tells you that she loves you with such conviction, her tone adoration laced even as you torment her.

He realized then that his sister had been right. Tsireya had just been being nice to him. She didn’t like him back.

The future Tsahik had never once spoken to him that way.

You coo at her.

Leaning down to press your lips against her smooth back “I love you- you’re everything to me, Reya. Come now. Squirt for me one more time”

The sounds Tsireya let’s out as she orgasms are almost un-Na’vi. She sounds like she’s dying. Gone is the innocent girl who’d welcomed him on the beach. This woman is someone he doesn’t know- someone he’ll never know.

Lo’ak pulls away once he watches Tsireya collapse in your arms.

He can’t bare to watch the loving embrace the two of you share.

He stumbles back the way he came.

Lolololol this shit was so fun to write. I love a jealous Reader. Poor Lo’ak got humbled real quick.

#tsireya smut #aged up tsireya #tsireya x reader

[panzershrike-pretz]

UHHHHHH ANOTHER TAG GAME MADE BY THE MOST AMAZING @onehelluvamarine!!! I LOVE THESE KEKKEKEKEKEK

----------------------------------------------

A band you don’t like that many others do:

Well, it's not that I don't like, it's more like: I only ever heard probably 3 songs. That would be The Beatles; I never got really interested in their music, they're not my vibe really

A childhood memory that you remember vividly:

I have many, but one of them was when I was maybe 6? and I went with my dad to the bank deposit money. He found a friend of his and started talking to him, while I picked up some pigeon and turtledove feathers up off the ground. That friend was deaf, but he could still speak a little and he congratulated me on the feathers then gave me a pat on the head (he was strong as fuck??)

Least favorite animal and why:

Any insect, but ESPECIALLY cockroaches. I'm so fucking scared, you have no idea 💀

Hot fandom take:

Scourge is one of my favorite characters from Warriors, I don't care if he's an edgy bitch. My man clawesd open Tigerstar'sbelly and made him loose all 9 lives at once???? Scourge is very fucking cool (also purple collar is the real collar. But I like rainbow)

Do you were any jewelry, if so, what’s your favorite piece:

I have a pair of gold earings! When I was born, my ears were pierced and I got those. I only ever changed them once (boughr a pair that's a little bigger, but my baby earings are still here). I can't use any other kind of earing or jewelry on the ears or else I'll have an allergic reaction 🤡

A movie others liked but you didn’t:

How To Train Your Dragon 3 (actually, did anyone like that??) I don't like the Light Fury and it feels so wrong having Toothless leave Hiccup 😭😭😭 It's a damn pretty movie but I still consider itto be non-canon <3

Three things you love about yourself:

My sense of humor, my eyes and my hair

A place you hope to visit in the future and why:

Paleontological digging site. I know I'll visit it with my college, but!! I can't wait!!

There's also this wildlife reserve-park thingy on the way to the state of Paraná called Vila Velha (Old Village) that I NEED to visit one day. It's such a pretty view from the road, I swear 😭

An actor that gets on your nerves and why:

I know nothing about famous people, so I don't care for their lives. I have my own problems, no time to bother with theirs :3

Things you’re excited for in the nearby future?

TAXIDERMY CLASSES! TAXIDERMY CLASSES!!! TAXIDERMY CLASSES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Least favorite ship in a fandom you’re in:

The fuck is with people shipping Alastor (Hazbin Hotel) with everyone. He's canonically aroace, get a grip fellas 😭😭 (yes aroace people can still have any kind of relationship but fuck. Alastor? He very clearly is NOT in the game for a ship,,,,,, and when I finally find a lil' scrap of representation, people want to strip that from the character??? Nuh-uh, I hate Alastor ships. Leave him be!!)

What’s the most toxic fandom you’ve been in?

.........Dream SMP 💀 *explodes and dies*

List three things you find beautiful about life:

Being able to hear birds singing (and see them flying), snuggling together with my dog when I'm feeling down and long walks on the beach with said dog.

Any dreams for the future?

I have a big big BIG interest in falconry (although it's a very odd thing for Brazil 😭) and, obviously, i can't wait to learn taxidermy. I know it's a stinky and slow process to learn and mount stuff, but I can't wait to start learning and hopefully have my first bird piece done!

How are you really feeling today?

I just woke up to a pair of chacalacas (why the fuck araquã in English is like this?) screaming like crazy, so I haven't had the time to feel anything xD

Damn this got big-

Tagging (no pressure!): @onehelluvamarine (do your version >:3) @xxluckystrike @blueberry-ovaries @1waveshortofashipwreck @grumpy-liebgott @executethyself35 (and whoever else wants to join!)

#🥨🪶 #tag game

[trashboatprince]

so what is exactly Good Omens?

Good Omens is the story about an angel and demon who have lived on Earth since the Garden of Eden six thousand years ago, and eleven years before the main events the demon is given the task of taking a basket to a satanic nunnery in order to start the first steps of The End of Days. The demon and angel then spend eleven years trying to raise the contents of basket, a baby, but they fucked up. They're doing this because they love Earth and don't want The War.

The story is about the Antichrist, who is destined to destroy the world during the week of his eleventh birthday. He is raised in a tiny, perfect English village with his three best friends and his dog. He doesn't know who he really is or what his destiny is, but he is going to have the most interesting week of his young life.

The story is about a witch, who calls herself an occultist, who is ruled by the only accurate book of prophesies in human history, written by her ancestor, the last true witch of England. There is also a witchfinder who can't touch electrical items without completely destroying them who is going to make her see the world a little bit off kilter from her normal straight path of seeing it.

There are also the Four Horsepersons of the Apocalypse, a psychic/lady of the evening, a witchfinder who takes his job too seriously but sucks at it, nuns, humans, aliens, raining fish, demons who like to lurk, a demonic prince, the voice of God, and a whole cast of other little bits and bobs of characters.

Basically, it can be summed down in a few ways:

This is a story that is about love, and how it can influence the world around you, in a sense. Be it platonic, familiar, romantic, any of the forms of love. It's hard to explain, but it's a strong element of the book, the show, and the radio version.

It is also a story about not following what is expected of you, to do what you think is truly best. Good and evil are not white and black, they are gray, they are complicated, you can't have one without the other. You can be good, you can be bad, you can be very perfectly, wonderfully human as both.

The shorter answer is: a demon, an angel, and the Antichrist walk into the Apocalypse and make it all go pear shaped.

Take it with a grain of salt, this is how I see the story, others will tell you differently, which is good, it means we all see the story in a way that makes sense to us.

#john's commentary

[mahouknightdrabunwolfcat]

*deep inhale* 5, 7, 8, 11 (I know you have many things so maybe one of your favorites or one you're fixated on right now!), 16, 17, 19, 20, 22 (I think I know the answer to this), 23, 24 (I also know some of the answer to this), 26, 27, 28, 29 and 30: least favorite Animal Crossing villager and least favorite Pokemon!

YAY lots of questions!!! This will prolly post a while after the other ask you sent me cause it’s gonna take a bit XD

5. favorite form of potato?

I have never been the biggest potato person, I thought I hated them as a kid but I have realized in the last years I do like potatoes just not a ton. Anyways I enjoy baked chips, crispy shoestring fries (If fries ain’t crispy I don’t want them), my partner makes yummy homemade fries too >w< but my fave is prolly sweet potato, including sweet potato fries and also sweet potatoes baked with brown sugar, that shit is heavenly -w-

7. what animal do you look forward to seeing when you visit an aquarium?

ALL OF THEM!! I adore water dwelling creatures so much and have always had a special interest in marine biology! But I, especially at our zoo, love seeing the penguins (they’re so interactive and love to play with you by the glass) n also sharks n stuff, but yeah I love them all <3

8. do you change into specific clothes for the house when you get home?

I always change into pajamas right away if we have no other plans to go out! Lounging around in normal clothes feels uncomfortable to me, pajamas feel so free and safe -w-

11. anything from your childhood you’ve held on to?

Lots of things as you said!! x3 I’m a very nostalgic person!! My fave plushie I own is a bunny named Mocha and I also have lots of games I’ve owned since I was a kid and a childhood ps2 I cherish, the old copy of KH1 I have for it, I dunno I have so much XD I also have a collection of pony figures from mlp g4 that I love, and I still have and wear this shirt I got in hot topic when I was 12 ⬇️

16. thoughts on mint chocolate chip?

Hate it! Ew! Disgusting! I’m sorry for me personally it’s the equivalent of eating toothpaste on chocolate and I’m just not into it x3

17. an anxious compulsion you do everyday?

I feel I bite my nails, also I anxiously stretch x3

19. the veggie you dislike the most?

I fucking hate beans like maybe all types of them, I dunno. It’s a sensory thing I hate the bean skins or whatever it is -w-‘ I also don’t like celery it’s boring and gets stuck in my teeth which is another sensory thing XD

20. favorite disney princess movie?

Beauty and the Beast!!! I also love Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, The Little Mermaid, and Mulan for many reasons hehe. I love Disney history, art and such so the older movies are my cup of tea x3

22. do you have an emotional support water bottle?

I do!! You know this hehe but it’s an animal crossing one with Mabel, Sabel and Label all over it :3 water bottles I tend to get attached to and this one my mom gave me after my other one broke earlier this year. I try my best to take care of my bottle cause they’re important to me 💖

23. do you wear jewelry?

Not really a lot, I do occasionally wear this sunflower bracelet that matches with Luma’s 🌻 and I have a necklace also from them that is a rose one and I love both of those! Otherwise I don’t really wear jewelry!

24. which do you find yourself using, american or british english?

It depends XD I mostly use USA English cause I am from the usa, but on the other hand I type lots of words with spelling that is not typical usa spelling such as colour and defence. Some terminology I use out loud too but not a lot :3

26. how’s your spice tolerance?

Preeeetty low XD I think higher than others who have like NO spice tolerance but I can mostly handle some spice in like, sushi, spicy mayo, that kind of thing? But I can’t really handle a lot of it or very slowly cause not only do I get sick from spicy food but my mouth burns so fast -w-‘

27. what’s your favorite or go-to outfit?

I’m not sure if I have one! :0 going vague tho I like wearing loose t-shirts with my interests on it especially like games or whatever, I love baggy pants but I mostly only have pajama baggy pants. I guess anything comfy and casual is my go to :3

28. last meal on earth?

Gimme an all you can eat sushi platter with my favourite rolls covered in eel sauce and spicy mayo and I’ll be happy :3

29. preferred pasta noodle?

Hmm I love tortellini and ravioli a ton :3c for non filled pastas I love shells, mini shells, rotini (especially garden rotini), gnocchi, and angel hair!

30. Least favourite animal crossing villager and least favourite Pokemon!

AC villager easy!! I hate Barold and Yuka. Barold cause he’s ugly and his design just feels racist and I hate that :/ for Yuka it’s cause of personal reasons, she’s a bitch in my ACPG town and I can’t stand her XD

Least fave Pokémon.. it’s hard I don’t like saying I hate any Pokémon but I like really don’t like these Pokémon..

#thank you my friend!! sorry this took a while :’3 #asks #ask game #verdantmeadows

[mermaidsirennikita]

Have you read Kerrigan Byrne's victorian rebels?

Yes. I have issues with some things Kerrigan has written (which I'll get into) and additionally her use of AI art and reaction to (pretty forthright but not impolite) critique of the use of AI art that make it so that, where I was initially in love with the first couple of books I read by her (The Highwayman and Seducing a Stranger) I can't recommend her anymore. My takes on those books:

The Highwayman--honestly great, I'm afraid. Dark and interesting and hot. Love the hero and the heroine. Has one of my favorite sex scenes ever. I own it and I will reread it, but again, I don't feel like I can recommend her in general.

The Hunter--has a lot of good stuff going for it but a) I actually realized later that this has, down to a science, the exact same twist as Darling Beast by Elizabeth Hoyt; I'm not suggesting this was intentional, but where I see people compare The Highwayman to a Kleypas book a lot, that was some general structural stuff, whereas this is THE EXACT same twist b) more importantly, I super hate the hero having a martial arts instructor who gives vague "East Asian" types of platitudes in broken English, it's gross! I also remember this really weird passage about a brown manservant (who is later killed, fwiw) being described as like... really simple... and having "gentle eyes" like a cow or horse or something. It felt gross.

And I will say: obviously, I've read HR authors who've done similarly. It's always bad. What I find adds an extra layer of concern to Kerrigan's work is that it's all relatively recent. You're not picking up a book from the 80s where I wouldn't even expect a (white) critique partner or editor to be likely to call this shit out. I really don't get it.

The Highlander--oh, man. This has the bones of being a sexy Highlander Captain Von Trapp book. And I'll be honest, I loved the leads and their dynamic on a basic level. EXCEPT. AND THIS IS A BIG EXCEPT. For the fact that the hero is a self-admitted war criminal. His angst? Is that he was an officer in the Queen's Army who razed Indian villages to the ground and killed/drove the killings of innocent civilians. And you know what? He feels bad about it, which is why he took a child who was one of the only survivors of one of his massacres and made him his vALET! GREAT! LOVE IT!

I'll be honest, I found so little criticism of this (probably because the book generally isn't popular--I read Seducing a Stranger first, I think, and The Highwayman second, or the other way around, so this was somewhere in the middle of the pack) that I was like "maybe I just exaggerated it in my head" but I reread it and nope, it was uhhhh pretty bad dude. Like, the valet guy then tries to kill the hero and the book is kinda like "well fair" but it's also like lmao? This is the villainous crux of the novel...? And kinda fed into the "untrustworthy sneaky servant of color" thing, which like, YEAH. HE SHOULDN'T BE TRUSTWORTHY BECAUSE IN TURN WHY WOULD HE EVER LIKE THE GUY WHO KILLED HIS FAMILY.

The Duke--I don't remember much of this one tbh

The Scot Beds His Wife--I liked this one a lot back in the day, but I haven't read it in a while so perhaps I missed some horror, can't confirm or deny

The Duke with the Dragon Tattoo--same as the above

Seducing a Stranger--I loved this one; I love Carlton Morley; I really wish there weren't so many things going on with the rest of the series, dude.

The thing is that Kerrigan's issues with race keep cropping up. The Highlander is the biggest example. But I remember there being some weird shit in How to Love a Duke in Ten Days that I honestly, blame is on me here, missed the first go re: fetishized islanders. It's like, throwaway lines where I get the vibe that she's trying to acknowledge that people of color exist in the Victorian era, which good in theory, but it's often patronizing or fetishistic or downright "what the fuck were you thinking" as with The Highlander. They're often servile. It's just not the look, and the thing is that if it happens and an author gets called out and takes that feedback and works on their books... I'm white, it's not on me to say whether or not that's valid. But Kerrigan's work has it repeatedly, and she should know better. Plus, she just seems super bad at taking criticism (I've heard of her responding to critiques of The Highwayman super defensively, in a setting wherein her response was not necessary or wanted) so I doubt she'd work on it.

I think she's honestly a very talented writer, and the two books I say I loved? I loved. I recommended them all the time back in the day. But I did some self analysis and was like "Do you honestly feel good about recommending these books with the concerns you have about the books you're not recommending?" Because there are situations, where one mildly problematic book (say, a book with a slut shaming heroine written 10+ years ago) won't put me off recommending other, ideally later works by the author. But The Highlander WASN'T mild and it wasn't isolated. And after the AI thing happened, it was like--dude, you should know better, you shouldn't be recommending books by someone that gives you vibes this bad.

And I shouldn't have given her the leniency I did after The Highlander. That's really on me.

#romance novel blogging #anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk #it's just rare that an author who wrote a book i do love as much as the highwayman turns me off THAT much

[cooliogirl101]

if lily was reincarnated into the naruto world, how would that turn out?

Got another ask that was like, "what if both Hisana and Sayuri reincarnated in the Narutoverse" so I'm just gonna combine the two into "what if both Christina and Lily reincarnated into the Narutoverse."

I've always thought Lily/Sayuri shared quite a few similarities with Itachi, so...here you go. An AU in which Lily gets reincarnated as Itachi and Christina gets reincarnated as Sasuke.

The thing about canon!Itachi is that he was split between his duty to his village, his duty to his clan, and his love for his brother. He ended up deciding his clan was an inevitable sacrifice if he wanted to save his village and his brother, and well-- we all know how well that turned out.

Lily!Itachi, on the other hand, does not give a single flying fuck about Konoha, the Uchiha clan, or really anything except for the only person who's made her feel less alone since arriving in this godforsaken world. There's no dilemma, no conflict there, because Sasuke is the only thing that matters. So what happens is that she decides, you know what, I'm just gonna fake my and Sasuke's deaths and get the fuck out of this hellhole before shit really hits the fan. Konoha, Danzo, the Uchiha? They can eat each other alive for all she cares.

"Lily," Christina said, a little helplessly. "Lily, maybe we should talk about this."

She spoke in English, the way she always did when they were alone. One of the most widely spoken languages in their previous life reduced to a secret code between them alone.

Lily hummed, giving her a small smile.

"What's there to talk about?" She asked.

"I mean." Christina paused delicately. "We did just fake our deaths and defect from the village. That's a pretty major event."

She looked at Lily.

"You bought us a little time, but sooner or later, they're going to realize that we didn't actually die. You realize that, right?"

"What are you saying?" Lily asked.

"What I'm saying is that maybe we should make ourselves a little less recognizable." She smiled, eyes bright. "They're going to be looking for two brothers. Not two sisters."

Lily's breath caught.

"Are you really able to--?"

"There's not much I'm not able to do, with chakra," Christina laughed. "Granted, it'll take a bit of time, but to start...how do you feel about the names Isane and Shion?"

~~

Honestly their 'fake our own deaths and transform ourselves so completely no one will ever be able to recognize us and then proceed to lay low/live a quiet peaceful life away from any ninja bullshit' plan would've worked, had it not been for the fact that Christina/Sasuke/Shion was completely unable to stay away from any bullshit happening at any given time.

"Please tell me how in our attempt to become boring, unremarkable civilian figures unworthy of any shinobi attention, we ended up becoming vigilante heroes roaming the countryside dispensing justice everywhere we go instead," Isane said dryly.

"Oh, come on," Shion huffed. "You can't tell me that you didn't enjoy bashing that Gatou asshole's head in."

"That's not the point, the point is--"

"The point is that for the first time since entering this life, I'm seeing you smile and have fun," Shion interrupted. "And if that means attracting a bit of attention? Well, I'm willing to take that risk."

(It's interesting thinking about what their interactions would be like, I don't write them together that often. Comments welcome!)

#wtl!au #tlm!au #charcoal and paint au

[vera-gemini]

My headcanons for the boys after All Quiet On The Western Front

This is based mostly on the book (also english is not my mother tongue, pls be kind with me)

I’m really interested in reading other fans headcanons too ! (And if you have something to say about mine… I would be glad to talk about it !)

Paul and Albert : I ship them ! They would be very supportive and loving towards each other. Just traumatized guys trying to heal together and live a normal life, you know. But they’re both depressed and disillusioned after the war :/ I think they would have socialist or communist tendencies too ! They would be very touching (did you know that I love them together ? Hahaha)

Kat : Pretty sure he would become a communist lmao. I won’t elaborate but in my books he would participate in the German revolution in 1919 (yay to spartakist Kat !) He would be happy to see his family again, ofc (but he misses Paul) I feel like he would be desperate after the Revolution fails, though…

Haie : I have two headcanons for him bc he’s quite an interesting character. The optimistic version : he falls in love with a plump servant girl, they have four kids and he becomes the village policeman (and the ultimate wife guy). The pessimistic version : he is afraid of becoming very poor again, so he joins the Freikorps and he loses all his friends because of that, and he becomes a fascist asshole (this is BLEAK but so is post-WW1 Germany…)

Tjaden : I have read The Road Back so… well… I won’t spoil the book. But he will always be a lucky bastard ! He still has a big crush on Haie (my bff has the same headcanon), but his wife never finds out about it. All the restaurant owners in town love him… and fear him.

Müller : He doesn’t give a fuck about the Revolution, he thinks it will miserably fail. Pragmatic as he is, he will just resume his studies and marry a well-off woman (maybe a rich widow ?)

Leer : He will become the biggest fuckboy in town. After numerous affairs with married women, he narrowly escapes a murder attempt by a jealous husband

Kemmerich : What can I say… just a little gay cottagecore guy… living in the woods with his bf, his cats and his hens…

Josef Behm : I just hope he would bully Kantorek after the war ends.

Detering : He goes back to his farm, his beloved wife, and his horses. He plants new cherry trees in his orchard.

#all quiet on the western front #im westen nichts neues #aqotwf #my headcanons #can you guess that I’m a leftist lmao

[larnax]

tentative ochette rework with unfucked formatting

so ochette is a little different than throné in that her problem is fundamental and so basically everything but the bones of her story is Bad, for one simple reason: the implementation of the beastlings sucks ass

now that being said i am not going to sit here and explain why the beastlings are handled very poorly bc 1) ive already done that and 2) it's actually a really easy fix. just make beastling a trait you gain becoming a hunter and the rest of toto'haha are just normal fantasy pacific islanders. they did this with tropu'hapu and it was fine so they clearly can make a normal fantasy pacific islander region if they want to, so just. do that. and then because beastlings are just humans who've become hunters, treat them like humans. they speak the language they're already all native speakers of fluently and they are just people do not be weird.

but you may ask, how would becoming a hunter give you cat ears? and the answer is very simple, deus ex subjob menu. in ot1 the subclasses are literally blessings from the gods, so you can just imply that a similar thing is happening here where draefendi blesses you with the power of kemonomimi once you join her hunt. or a wizard did it who care. beastlings 100% exist primarily so the hunter class can make your characters catboys bc thats awesome so its better for everything if we're just honest with that

how does this fix everything?: well 1) as the beastlings are no longer infantilized animalistic caricatures, there is less racism in the game, 2) this makes the hunter subclass no longer technically racefaking, and 3) it means that the 20 year old woman who is the only protagonist from toto'haha no longer has to be treated like a toddler

yes i know this breaks temenos' chapter 5. i dont care. skill issue.

so anyway ochette. unfortunately ochette's entire character is noble savage/toddler so she needs an overhaul

my proposal is to make her more autistic keep her caring a lot/focusing on her interests, which are now: hunting, cooking, and languages.

these were mainly chosen based on her existing mechanics, except for languages which is tied into the fact that i want to change her night path action to be swapped with hikari's so befriend now gains you information. (yes i know this would make bribe identical to hire so you would have to change what mechanic it relies on. idk which one im not a doctor). this is mainly because ot2 already does a lot of interesting things with path actions even outside of character stories and i wanna push the thing where some NPCs can only have certain path actions just a little farther and make it so that not all NPCs can be info-gathered by all characters because some of them only speak other languages. yes ik this would require them to create some conlangs but it doesnt have to be Every character and creating one fairly simple conlang for ochette's story and maybe like 3 more for random NPCs to have 1 line in seems fully possible. they already made a couple different writing systems. actually they could literally just keep the writing systems and just write romaji/english/etc sentences in them if they dont wanna do a real language.

why ochette? Because I Said So. i told you guys i held back on throné ochette not having much of a character means i get to enter silly mode

anyway so Ochette Autism activate. she will now love cooking. she invents new recipes and likes finding ways to cook complicated stuff with only things she can gather in the moment. she has extensive knowledge of every edible plant in toto'haha. her first thought when she sees an elemental spirit with no physical body is "yeah i could make a mean fucking soup of that creatyre". she would hunt regardless as the main hunter for her village but the reason she Loves hunting is that she loves finding her own ingredients. she also really loves languages. no longer is animal language automatically translated, now she just learned how to speak the languages of animals from toto'haha and some others from juvah. she likes talking to people and is academically interested in languages. this partly comes from convenience bc shes had to get used to learning languages to speak with the village and her animal companions but its also partly because she has trouble communicating with people and its one of the ways she tries to account for that. also more on that in the story since its what ill be focusing on. she cares a lot about sustainability and is fundamentally against killing what you won't eat. her main flaws are that 1) despite her love of languages she often has difficulty communicating with people even if she can understand them, 2) she doesn't really care about anything outside her interests, and 3) due to her living her entire life in a small village of people who all knew her she's kind of unfamiliar with the concept of a stranger who doesn't immediately get her and can sometimes be overly familiar or opaque to people who don't understand her

her extensive cooking knowledge will mostly be used for jokes and in travel banter while her language skills will be the driving force of the story

also due to this im rewriting her relationship map lets just go in order. so as she and castti now are both knowledgeable about plants and meat(most of the human body is meat) the two of them keep finding things they have in common, and also because ochette's prepared food grants a bunch of positive effects she and castti end up talking about the benefits of healthy eating and medicinal properties of food a lot. she and throné initially have an awkward relationship because ochette is very satisfied with her life and she. isnt, but as throné goes through her story where she's worried that a killer is all she'll ever be and she's a permanent net negative for the world, ochette provides her with an example of someone who has a sustainable relationship with life and death and gives her hope that she might eventually be able to find an occupation where she can use her skills to benefit herself and other people, and also they are gay. osvald and she are initially very awkward because ochette talks a ton and osvald is completely unreceptive but as their stories progress osvald decides that ochette would probably make a pretty good scholar if being a hunter ever falls through for her and shes like yeah haha maybe in another life. partitio and her are mismatched despite being similar because despite both of them being singlemindedly determined about their interests but coming off as endearing because one of those interests is befriending people means they get along on a lot of fronts, partitio is very focused on progress and increasing in scale whereas ochette simply isn't and couldn't care less about inventions that don't have anything to do with her specialties. agnea finds out in her chapter 2 that ochette actually has a really good singing voice and spends the rest of her story trying to get ochette to contribute a verse to the song of hope but hijinks ensue as ochette only knows how to write lyrics in languages agnea can't understand and in the case of a bird language can't replicate. temenos and she spend basically all their travel banters fighting about theology because ochette could not give less of a fuck about any gods besides draefendi and temenos is like What do you mean "tell aelfric to call me back when he can give me awesome cat powers" and "if my religion was existentially threatened by the existence of other religions i would simply not lmao". she and hikari are just kind of on the same team because she's very against killing without purpose

now onto her story. the basic structure will actually be the same, i'm keeping the night of the scarlet moon and her journey to be finding and bringing back the three guardian beasts, However the how will be different

chapter 1: i'm removing the territorial dispute entirely partly bc as beastlings and humans are now the same theres no village divide and also octopath's tone and writing simply aren't equipped to handle this issue well, so we're cutting it. we are keeping the flashback of ochette choosing between the jackal and owl though, and the first scene being her hunting the king iguana its basically just that the companion is like "can we not wait until we get back to town to cook this thing" and ochette is like "no it tastes better if you cook it immediately" and then theres a little cutscene of her grilling it on the spot. she gets back to town and is sharing the jerky with everyone and then goes to speak with juvah, who tells her she's going to be the village guardian. ochette is reluctant because she enjoys her current life where she's able to only do things she finds interesting, but juvah says she's the only person strong enough to do it, and they talk about how the forest is changing. suddenly cohazeh shows up and says that a woman has wandered into the tomb of the wanderbeasts and can someone go get her, ochette says yeah of course and sets off. when she arrives the woman is acting very strangely and ochette has to provoke her. after being defeated she calms down and can be befriended to gain information about being attacked by a weird creature. after that she joins the party and they return to find juvah fighting the weird creature, with her taking over after he's injured and defeating it. after it's defeated, juvah takes her to the tombs and tells her about the prophecy and that this will be the final test of whether or not she's ready to be the guardian and then falls asleep. ochette reluctantly sets off, unsure if she'll be able to pass this trial.

chapter 2: the structure of 2 is actually mostly fine it's just ochette as a character that's changed. when she shows up she's frustrated by the way conning creek differs from the village and has an awkward confrontation with a food stall owner because she doesn't understand the concept of making food when you might be making more than you need before being stopped by her companion and reminded what she came here for. she goes to the coast and finds alpione who blocks her path and tells her that she'll be encroaching on sacred land if she goes to the island, ochette insists she needs to go and is confused by alpione not trusting her even though ochette knows she's not going to do anything bad, but fails to communicate this effectively. alpione has to be challenged and after her defeat ochette goes to find the island completely empty. at the tail end of the little spiral alpione shows up. she initially refuses to talk but can be befriended, at which point she'll share that cateracta was killed by a strange hunter and left to rot. alpione and the other guardians made use of her remains out of respect. ochette is angered by cateracta's death but is relieved that she at least wasn't left to decay, and alpione finally realizes that ochette holds the same respect for animals that she does, at which point she asks why ochette wanted to meet cateracta. ochette explains her situation more clearly and alpione is like. why did you not say that before. and mentions that there's one piece of cateracta that remains, and that it too shouldn't go to waste, giving her cateracta's egg which hatches into acta. before leaving, ochette is again conflicted and reflects on what happened. she still doesn't really get why alpione took so long to understand her motivations and wonders if she could ever be capable of being the village guardian when she feels like she'll never really understand people even if she can talk to them. she'll especially never understand people like the hunter, and doesn't know what she would do if she ever came across someone like that.

chapter 3: ochette shows up in crackridge to find the earthquakes and goes around asking about tera but everyone refuses to talk to her about it, except for an old woman speaking a language she doesn't understand but who reacts to the name 'tera' by speaking a lot. ochette has to go around befriending people until she finds the woman's son who when befriended will share the location of a [language]-solistian dictionary which ochette can use to understand how to befriend the woman, at which point she gives ochette directions on where to find tera. ochette finds the sleeping tera and tries to wake him up but nothing works until the old woman from before shows up and shouts something in [language], at which point tera wakes up, but attacks ochette. after being captured, he calms down and recognizes that ochette is from toto'haha and figures out what's going on. he says that the old woman is a descendant of the first inhabitants of crackridge and that she's been waking him up to feed him while he tries to recover from a fight with the hunter. ochette asks why he attacked her and he says that the hunter tricked the woman's ancestor into revealing his location and he thought this was another case of that. ochette is like ohhh i see, and tera says he's healed up enough to accompany her back to the island. tera also teaches her how to thank the woman for her help, and he explains what's going on to her and that she won't need to feed him for a while. on the way back, the townspeople get angry at her for all the earthquakes but ochette says that she subdued tera and he won't be back for some time and also will be calmer when he returns. the old woman's son finds her and says he's surprised that anyone actually bothered to understand his mom, saying that although plenty of people have tried to calm down tera all of them gave up when they realized she didn't know any solistian. ochette says it's lucky she's good at learning languages, but the son says that it's probably also that she realized ochette was trying to help. he wishes her luck on her journey. ochette stops to think about things. she's still conflicted, now aware there are lots of kind of miscommunication, but found it satisfying to actually use her skills to talk with someone she otherwise wouldn't have been able to . she still doesn't want to be the guardian if it means she can't just do what she wants, but wonders if she might get to feel this satisfaction over being able to help resolve an issue using her skills if she did take up the job.

chapter 4: ochette arrives in stormhail and after befriending a townsperson is told that glacis lives on the peak of the mountain, but the townsperson warns her that the blizzards have been so intense that trying to climb it will be extremely dangerous. ochette says that she doesn't really have a choice and sets out for the mountain anyway. she's blocked by the sanctum guard and although she tries to explain why she needs to get past the guard refuses to listen to her and she eventually resorts to knocking him out. just before she starts up the path, she's stopped by heig who Again warns her and ochette, now very annoyed, snaps at him that for the last fucking time she just needs to see glacis, heig insists she'll die just like the others, ochette says she's built different and leaves anyway. on the way up the mountain she finds several frozen corpses which she and her companion figure out must have been caused by glacis. heig shows up and is like "see? all these great hunters were felled by glacis' fury. you're fucked". ochette realizes he's trying to help her and befriends him to figure out his perspective, he explains that this is his old crew and they were trying to hunt glacis. ochette asks why, he says for glory. ochette's disgusted that they were just planning to take her head and leave, and says she doesn't have any sympathy for the dead hunters. heig admits they were acting selfishly and says that he only survived because he hesitated, and then fled while glacis was killing the rest of his party, so now he tries to atone by making sure nobody else makes it up the mountain. ochette says she has no intention of killing glacis and that he's actually preventing anything from getting better by just locking her away instead of actually trying to make it up to glacis herself. heig is like.... shes a bird, and ochette explains that all animals are sentient and can be reasoned with if you're willing to learn their language, and that he should apologize to her personally. he leaves, but ochette notices that he's going up the mountain instead of down. she thinks that just leaving the bodies here is wasteful, but eventually decides it should be up to glacis who hunted them what to do. she gets to the peak to find heig unconscious in the snow and a furious glacis who attacks her. after being subdued ochette asks glacis what happened and she says that heig started shouting at her. ochette explains that she told him to apologize for he and his comrades' selfishness. glacis is surprised, but allows ochette to get heig, and when he wakes up glacis says she'll listen to ochette if she translates for him. heig apologizes on behalf of his party for attacking glacis and says that he's spent the years since then trying to atone, but that her blizzards are wrecking stormhail and killing innocent people and it may be time for both of them to move on. glacis is suspicious that he's only apologizing because ochette made him, but reluctantly accepts that he actually never attacked her earlier and was just talking in a way she couldn't understand. she agrees to accompany ochette back to toto'haha, and says that when she returns to stormhail she will protect it instead of attacking it. she also says that if heig learns how to speak to her, she'll allow him to atone for the attack by becoming her helper, which he agrees to. ochette asks what glacis wants to do with the bodies of the fallen hunters, and glacis replies that now that the blizzard is gone they should naturally be consumed by the animals of the mountain. heig is resistant to the idea until ochette explains that it's a sign of respect to allow them to return to nature in death and should be their way to make up for their actions since they're not alive to do it themselves, which he accepts. ochette leaves the two of them and returns to stormhail to think. she's still angry on glacis' behalf at heig and the hunters, but this has shown her that there are cruel or selfish people who can be convinced to change if made to understand the problem and people who appear to be acting cruelly who just don't have the full context. she also realizes that understanding people means considering the perspectives of people she's diametrically opposed to even if she never comes to agree with them. from her experience with juvah she knows that being the guardian comes with the responsibility to protect the entirety of toto'haha, even the parts and people she doesn't particularly care about, and thinks that she would probably have to change as a person to achieve that level of understanding. could she do it? does she want to? does she have the obligation to even if she doesn't want to?

chapter 5: ochette returns to toto'haha with all the guardians. juvah is relieved, saying that the amount of weird beasts in the forest is increasing and that people were starting to get hurt. he asks her if she's ready to take on the mantle of guardian, and ochette admits that she's still not sure. suddenly, night falls and the blood moon is out. that sequence is mostly unchanged, you're fighting tons of Weird Creatures and using the guardians to bust through until she comes upon the companion she didn't choose and gets thrown into the ocean. she's rescued by the might of her current companion who channels the same force of draefendi that gives ochette her beastling power and they drag her out to the beach where she comes across the darkling. the climax is already very good so i'm leaving it unchanged except for ochette befriending the darkling and getting an info window that mentions that the darkling can now rest. the epilogue is juvah asking her the same question as before and ochette realizing that it's worth it to be the guardian and she's willing to grow to fill that role, deciding to continue on her journey until she's gained enough experience to confidently be a good guardian.

ochette's crossed paths is actually mostly good and in fact her translating the dourdour boar is one of the reasons i thought of the language thing for ochette, basically the only change is that ochette and castti have a different dynamic so no milf jokes(29 is too young to be a milf anyway. sorry) and the joke is instead that ochette is like "hmmmmmm. i wonder if i could cook the shadowy being" and castti is like "i feel like that would at least give you food poisoning"

#c.paradisi #octoposting

[neomedievalist]

sorry for being a rando popping into your inbox but wrt your posts about smt5 and the acnh effect, as a lifelong fan of animal crossing i hard agree on nh and it's kind of depressing to see so many people say it's the best animal crossing when it isnt even CLOSE. id say the downfall of ac started with new leaf since thats when they started lobotomizing the villagers, but acnl actually had tons and tons of content that kept me playing for literal years. meanwhile with nh i only popped in to check out the new updates then stopped playing. i could write an entire essay on how they completely gutted the original tone that animal crossing had with its writing and overall vibes and basically sanitized a fun, unique quirky little game into being The Relaxing Game.

with smt5, i think the problem is something different though. if you read the interviews from very early in v's production, the devs mention things they wanted to be in the story--namely, they wanted v to touch on themes of extremism in modern society and how in the face of the world being on fire gen z and millennials feel utterly hopeless and like they have no future. none of that was in the final product. granted, i have very little knowledge of game development but since v was in production prior to and during the pandemic, i have a theory that there was meddling on the part of corporate that really messed with the development process with the pandemic on top of that. according to a friend of mine, someone data mined v and there were a ton of unused assets and concepts, which seems to support my idea that there was a huge shift mid development that squandered v's potential.

one thing though, is that new people getting into smt though v means that they're more likely to play the other games in the series and see what it's like when smt's potential is realized, whereas this doesnt really exist for animal crossing since animal crossing is generally the same all around where each smt game has a vastly different story and tone from the other games.

(i might be misinterpreting but one criticism i have of your addition to that one post if you describing this phenomenon as Kirby On The Switch when as a lifelong kirby fan the most recent kirby game was unironically a near perfect game and most people seem to be in agreement on that and it was clear that hal labs put a TON of love and work into making it. but sadly kirby and the forgotten land is an exception to what you were talking about on that post)

sorry for the essay lol i just have Thots

HI YES thoughts appreciated! everyone always welcome to drop essays about video games in my inbox i love writing them and i love reading them

i wouldnt call myself a lifetime ac fan but i played the FUCK out of new leaf, i think i got it in 2014 and i have about 1000 hours in it, which is why i was so dissapointed with NH...and ive heard and understand peoples criticism of NL so it must be really really rough for old ac fans to see NH just double down on all that.

that's really interesting about smtv though, i hadn't heard that about the datamining and stuff? and i guess the original interview i hadnt seen because i wasnt into smt then LOL. i actually am gnna go look at that because it really does feel like a game that went thru development hell and had to rush things, i remember before release being really worried that we hadnt gotten any story trailers or english va announcements...esp since the game was announced at the same time as mario odyssey LOL

and yes thats very true that people might get into smt thru smtv. i definitely agree with that point but at the same time, someone is equally likely to not really click with it then drop it and not touch the series again... but well. not the point.

about kirby i was honestly thinking about that when i was posting it, i havent played the forgotten land but every kirby fan i know loves it (i was actually thinking of picking it up myself as a 3d platformer fan) so yeah i can def see how thats an exception. it is true that really good games with passion behind them still can come out which is really heartening, i wish it wasnt such a surprise when it happened!

but yes i think animal crossing really embodies this point. the way its become a cultural icon and people dont know what the series USED to offer so they think that NH is good and what they're all like is so dissapointing, especially as a life sim that youre meant to put tons of time into... it frustrates me to no end when i see people joking abt AHh i have no motivation to go back to my island its so much work i havent played in so long.. like this wouldnt have HAPPENED if the game wasnt shit!! i never had "no motivation" to play new leaf because it was an actual game and not a halfway between life sim and sandbox game that is the worst of both worlds! i checked in on new leaf EVERY. DAY. after school when i was in high school and id play for an hour each day. i dont think i missed a single day in maybe three years.

in new horizons i told myself id go back to it if they ever added cooking. then they added cooking and i went back to it and it sucked so i stopped playing again

there is literally no reason to play it other than customizing your island as a sandbox game but the sandbox elements are so fucking miserable to play that you have to be, excuse me for saying this, unemployed to actually find the time to make your island look good. the game coasted on the fact that it released right before the pandemic and everyone had the free time to play it.

#data #anyway. tl;dr all true points! #i have much more to say about NH but ill leave it at that and ive ranted abt it so much

[reasonablysurmised]

Amazon, machine translation scams, and outrage

This is going to be SUCH a "Middle-class woman with too much time on her hands gets huffy and writes a letter to the editor" post, but here we go (aside: I am only 1.5 of these things and I DEFINITELY don't have too much time on my hands but I do have the weekend and literature/translation-related indignation to fuel me).

So, be me, learning about badass turn-of-the-twentieth-century feminist and anti-tsarist Ukrainian poet, playwright, and all-around literature icon Lesya Ukrainka. Try to find any kind of anthology of her many works, and click over to Amazon because, well, you have to start somewhere. Find, to your dawning horror, the following as the first eight search results:

Know instantly that there is a 0% chance that any one of these was translated by a human actually qualified to translate these poems, even if you decide to give a generous view of the Amazon self-publishing industry. Attempt to rein in your outrage at this assault on translation decency (to say nothing of "Robert Bruce, King of Scotland," a poem about Scottish anti-colonialist struggles against England, being represented by a polo-wearing pensioner talking on his cell phone after a round of golf).

Investigate further.

Try to ignore the steam-whistle ears resulting from the UTTER FUCKING EFFRONTERY of TWENTY-SEVEN UNITED STATES DOLLARS for SEVENTEEN PAGES of almost-certainly garbage machine translation. Remain calm, sort of, and note the clear lack of an attributed translator (or publisher).

Grab hold of the rope of spite and let it pull you into the abyss, embrace the drive to find out if you're Right, download the Kindle app, download the free sample pages of Mermaid, the "romantic and lyrical poem...about a girl's love for her beloved Cossack."

(Thanks, this is really setting the 1885 Slavic village life mood for me.)

(Technically, TECHNICALLY, it could be worse. Like it's riddled with pronoun and tense inconsistencies and subject-verb agreement is a little lacking in places, but I could, if I wanted, convince myself that a person who makes a few idiosyncratic mistakes in Ukrainian-to-English translation worked on this, self-published using garish but free stock photos for the cover, and just got really fucking bold with their pricing.)

(This seems like underneath it all is a nice poem! However, nameless translator, I must comment that "the gray-haired guy got into his boat" is taking me out of the pastoral everyday tragedy of young lovers who don't keep their promises!)

Finish the free sample, despair at the death of literature and the seemingly unstoppable tide of the current cryptocapitalist hellscape. Writhe in bitterness, not unlike the young girl who got jilted by the grey-haired guy in the boat, and make a Tumblr post to cope.

Listen. Listen, okay. I can't PROVE that someone decided to use machine translation to make a quick buck off of an upswing in well-intentioned interest in Ukraine following a horrific invasion, while a bloated and uncaring corporate entity looked on with indifference. And I concede that this type of scam is so obvious that it would be shocking if such a person made more than like, three sales, so it's not exactly the crime of the century even if that's what happened.

But I still fucking HATE that this is where we're at. I am NOT going quietly into the brave new world of factory-production art that belittles every single person involved.

I discovered Lesya Ukrainka like...three hours ago so I'm not trying to speak out of turn on this but...people like her, who try to use writing to push the world forward, to capture the truth of what it's like to be alive in a particular place and time, whose works can CONNECT people from vastly different places across vastly different times--they matter! So this, this crass cash grab, it matters too.

We can absolutely get into the class complexity of who gets to have their words written down, who gets to have the leisure or financial support to translate those words or pick through them to form metanarratives a century later, who gets to be involved in publishing, and who gets to make a living off of any of these things--that's a separate post for another time. But the intersection of capitalism and instantaneous digital automation of language and image-based art/"art" is, I genuinely believe, a sea-change that is bigger than those fights, and bad news for almost everyone except the vanishingly tiny proportion of people who own the tech driving this (I would even argue that what could happen to human art as a result would be bad for THEM).

This is not the people who have been kept out of the publishing world "seizing the means of production" (why, WHY do you think they're handing the "means" to you for free?). This is the social devaluation of a source of psychological sustenance, at BEST to contribute to someone's material sustenance in the short term, that will lead to its MATERIAL devaluation in the long run so that neither human nor machine-made art will be reliable for material sustenance anyway.

SO. God (theism neutral) bless the writers and actors striking, god bless the authors suing, and may we find ways to build the barricades against "AI" overreach, especially in art (including translation), in the name of savings and profit.

(Also check out Lesya Ukrainka; she's pretty cool.)

#machine translation #artificial intelligence #sort of #amazon #capitalism #Ukrainian literature #lesya ukrainka

[balladofthewhitehorse]

France being pissed off for centuries upon centuries with england because he burned Joan is just too much of an exaggeration don't you think?especially considering the fact the French handed over Joan to the English to be burned, i think man like france does see nuance is such situation. Even if that wasn't the case giving that much important human mortality in midst of their unending life is too petty, and in canon he knows this very well, he made is peace and moved on. And englands fear of fire coming from this one human not his capital burning and being taken over multiple times is belittling the effect of English citizen suffering on england, the land and people would and should connect him more than this one part in history, albeit important and tragic, takes very little precedent to himself. Don't know I guess you just like France so you're giving him that much importance but some nuance should be applied I think.

I agree with you - however, I should note the French that were handing Joan over were Burgindians, a state that was currently supporting England at the time and she was put on trial and convicted of heresy by a Pro-English Burgundian; However, I agree with you that nuance would be applied...sadly, England and France lack quite a bit of nuance. England's fear of fire was *started* by Joan and progressively gotten worse, I mean...he *was* shoved into a firepit by Normandy. England also has other fears, that are more related to his people as you say. My autism for some ungodly reason hyperfixates on England out of all nations, so to say that I like France more than England is a bit odd? And besides, both are interesting nations who aren't really worse than each other to be frank. Also I feel like nation representations themselves are subjective. If they weren't, they wouldn't really be human. But they're swayed by negative biases and feelings and so on and so forth, because while they represent the people, they're also spirits unto themselves and I think France would be spiteful for centuries. I'd also argue it's not really about just Joan. It's about the fact he essentially turned on them for no apparent reason (in France's eyes at least which, again may I add, is subjective, and they expected that England would just chill in a few years) and the way England presents them in his narriative, to the point that Normandy's name is almost as interchangeable with France. Joan is merely a representation of all of that. Plus, England is quite a bit of a cunt to them, I was reading in a book about how the English burned and raided dozens of villages in France to the point where it may very well have turned some pro-English supporters into pro-France supporters cos they were really fucking fed up with the English raiding them like locusts. It's a complicated thing, could spend ages studying the 100 Years War tbh. Joan is merely the focal-point of their entire spat, because I think it was the point of no return. It was personal. England knew France cared for this person and England did it. Yes it was French people that handed them over to the English but they were Pro-English. They were Burgundians. So it's not like the Pro-French France faction handed Joan over, but the English allies who were french handed them over. And I've noted in my pinned post I don't take anything from canon, given that I don't consume any Hetalia content *aside* from fanblogs.

#hws #hetalia #hetalia world stars #hws england #aph england

[mylifetherant]

So, Disney put out that "We Dont Talk About Bruno, 21 Languages" version, and it made me really want to hear all of them. So i did, and catalogged it for tumblr. Tried to keep it down to two points each, so this wouldnt be any longer then its already going to be.

Theres two missing because i couldnt find the full versions online, so if anyone else has them please send them to me so i can complete the list!

Russian:

One of the lines in camillos verse is changed to, in russian, "A midnight howl, your nightmare" which fuckin slaps honestly. Also the pastor in this one sounds extra pathetic and i kinda love it.

Really just love the pronunciations of a lot of the russian language. This ones just fun for the ears honestly.

German:

Instead of saying THUNDER he just shouts EIN STORM and thats fucking hilarious.

Holy shit the camillo part in this one is. Like look ok i know the best part of the song is going to slap in any language but holy shit i did not expect to feel some type of way from the line "ein ratten" ok? Fuckin. Whoever they got to sing that part is fuckin wild and can have my babies holy fuck

Dutch:

DUN-DER

Does a really good job of capturing the inflection of the english VA's. Delores and camillo especially.

While it doesn't have any super defining features like some others, its a really smooth one to one recreation, the line changes don't interrupt the flow at all like it does in others, and honestly you could probly swap it with the english one and id never notice.

Polish:

Camilo really Spits out his verses in this one, really driving home that dark and terrifying vibe. Theres a serious force to some of his words that make them feel like theyre being hurled at you.

They actually pronounce Bruno's name differently, as a brun-yey or brun-ya, depending on the line, which i find really interesting.

Italian:

Not too crazy about this one overall

But

The FUNNIEST version of "isabella your boyfriends here" i've heard so far. You just have to hear it for yourself, i cant do it justice.

Thai:

A bit like the italian one, doesn't mesh quite as well as some others, that said

Thai-Delores verse fuckin sweeps this whole song. Its a little bit grittier and i fucking love it, really drives home the "dark secret" vibe.

Danish:

Danish-Felix puts a little flair at the end of his lines that i love. Its his own little personal oomph, that just feels like he was having fun with it.

Solid overall, though not too much that stands out.

French:

God DAMN does the french version go hard. These VAs just fuckin went OFF.

While there wasn't a lot of variance in inflection like some of the others, they really just fuckin sang their hearts out at the top of their lungs and its fuckin great.

Japanese:

Alright this was inevitable but camillo sounds like an anime villain especially during the "your boyfriends here" bit. Tell me that laugh aint straight outta your favorite shounen

I actually love the villagers verse! They have so much distinct character! Also as a sidebar, this is the best mirabel verse i've heard so far. The way she holds the "bruno" at the begining is just *chefs kiss*

Greek:

Sadly the only version i could find sounded like someone recorded it from their closet, so there might be some finer details i miss.

That said, still a solid rendition all around. Loved the voice for isabella in this one, just very pretty, idk how else to put it. Definitely on the higher end, but still mostly a one to one copy of the original. Which is not a bad thing, to clarify.

Korean:

Korean-Pepa&Felix are so much fun. Idk what it is but i love the vibes they put out.

Also, the dead fish girl just straight goes "the next day BLEG" and i fuckin wish they did that in the original because it so much funnier than saying it died.

Bulgarian

N/A for now?

Hungarian:

Sadly another low quality recording, but i don't think it suffered too much from it?

Its definitely the most unique rendition so far. Theres a weird tonal shift when camillos part comes in, and i think the beat is actually a bit slower from that point on. Whether thats good or bad ill leave up to you, im not 100% sure where i stand on it myself.

Norwegian:

Norwegian-Felix sounds like an absolute bear of a man and im kinda hear for it. Also point to Norwegian-Camillo for being the first one to actually sound like a fuckin teenager.

Also, this is more an overall but its at this point in my journey that im realizing…

Every nonenglish-version of Abuela's one line sounds almost identical, and they all sound like theyre sung by a dude. Idk what it is. Maybe my brain is suffering BrunoBrainRot.

Bahasa Malaysia:

Another A Tier dolores. As someone who preferred Camillo in the english version, in a lot of these its surprisngly Dolores who steals the show.

Also, just to make my last one look stupid, abuela is once again a woman. Actually, a lot of the VA's in this one sounded really close to the English VA's, Camillo especially.

Vietnamese

N/A for now

Euro Portugese:

Now THAT is a good Camillo. Not quite the level of some of my earlier faves, but still very good. Close to Russian Camillo.

I really enjoyed the inflection on Isebella's verse. Gave it a bit of extra oomph during a part i usually kind of glaze over. Her verse is pretty, but the slowest bit of the whole song, so i like when they do something that makes it Pop a bit more.

Brazilian Portugese:

Brazilian-Felix and the villagers both sound like theyre just having a blast. I really like the ones where it feels like they were just having fun recording.

Mirael and Camillo sound like they swapped ages, especially at the end. I cant stop picturing a 28 year old Camillo leaning on a tiny angry Mirabel's head.

Taiwanese Mandarin:

Taiwanese-Pepa is fucking beautiful. She should've gotten Isabellas verse, its so good. That said, its nice to hear an approach to Pepa that isn't so harsh.

Taiwanese-Camillo is haunting, a very ghostly quality to it. Its a different kind of spooky that i enjoy. Puts a fun spin on it.

Spanish:

Man i really saved the best for last. This is like the New Game+ of We Don't Talk About Bruno. Its the original, but better.

While there isn't anything that makes it necessarily unique, it takes every good quality from the english version and just cranks it up to 12. Def top tier material.

To close, this is a fantastic song in any language, that i'll be listening to for a very long time.

If anyone wants to hear these for themselves, i compiled a playlist for you, in order as they appear in this list: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLR5WNVkVKWQh0bSmkSLLFxxedR-28YNHr

#encanto #disneys encanto #we don't talk about bruno #encanto bruno #bruno madrigal #dolores madrigal #camillo madrigal #mirabel encanto #felix madrigal #pepa madrigal