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room-on-broom · 5 months

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20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tug by @marvellouslymadmim thank you so much me luv

Tagging @heathtrash @teapotteringabout @holdmecloser-gandydancer @womble1 @janetm74 @kiwi-cackles and YOU! and who else wants to do it! more questions under the read more

1. How many works do you have on A03?

48 (60 on fanfic)

2. What's your total A03 word count?

I've no idea, i messed up on my calculator and dont have the pactience to go back over it

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently Stingray and Thunderbirds. and worst witch. its always worst witch

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Jabberjay-ded (128 vs 4 comments lol) Little Wizard, The Broken Hand mirror, Mildred's Monstrous Misadventures, (ah yeah witching kind!) and I saw Seven Idiots.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Fanfic.net dosnt let me reply any more??? but I do try to. even if its just a key smash and a thankyou. or if its an emoji spam i emoji spam back. I love those.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hm. The closest ones I could think of are Death's acquaintance and In grief we bake. I don't tend to do agnsty endings. even the sad ish ones are kind hopeful.

EDIT: JABBERYJAYED! I forgot!? litreally a hunger games fic ends up in devistation?? fool.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I couldnt narrow it down so top 2: I saw 7 Dogs and Christmas Cards

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Onlya few times in the past. two of those times were Worst witch ship trolls and just deleted them. one was my fault, i got uppity with an 'UPDATE NOW' comment and user just went a few my other fics being rude. againn deleted.

9. Do you write smut?

write yes. post no. (not yet-!) :o

10. Do you write crossovers?

yes. Ive have a good half a dozen under my belt and a couple in the works.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

angain no not that i know of.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No but I would count @teapotteringabout @kiwi-collideoscope and Princess Sammi as , the amount i've bouced ideas about with them.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Mary Poppins and Bert. the OTP before i knew what the internet was.

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Froot, SEASICK and Cherrytree Carol. plus a bunch of WW ones. I keep picking them up but i feel like they might be left on the shelf a little longer.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue and character voices. I also love mixing humour in too, even just a little sprinkle into sad bits and I think i do that quite well.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Plot bunnies. and not finishing current WIPS. Ive made a mountain of improvement on that frount but yeah posting chapters before before the fics even 50% done. To the point ive sequeals to fics that are only two lines of an epic.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Massivise kudos who can do that. not my forte. The closest I've come is writing the odd burst of ASL and BSL for Unshackled and Chest Compressions, and a pinch of welsh for Lucretia’s Baller but as yet Hypothetical Birthday Cake.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Corpse Bride (2005). a sad little fic for a le sad victor van dort.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Ever? Probably have to Mildred's Montorus adventures. but Your mother and Mine's got a special place in my heartjust cos family and the catharisis .

Thank you!!

#y know?#long post #the worst witch #worst witch #fanfiction #thunderfam #the adventure zone #mary poppins #stingray 1964 #thunderbirds #thunderbirds are go #corspe bride #ask game #writers #taz balence #the hunger games

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elephant-in-the-pride-parade · 6 days

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20 Fic Writer Quesions

First, thank you @singeart and @mytardisisparked for tagging me!. I did a set of these last year and it was fun to see how my answers have changed since then!

How many works do you have on Ao3?

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

1.6 million and counting!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Star Trek Voyager

Star Trek Prodigy

Sailor Moon

Harry Potter

Madam Secretary

Ive debated writing SwanQueen for a long time but by the time I had the energy and time to write, I'd lost interest in the show. I might rewatch and come back to it one day...

I have thought about writing Wynonna Earp or Tamora Pierce universe fanfiction but have yet to get an idea that grabs me. I like to find things i want to fix and it's hard when the source material is perfection.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

The Parent Trap (305)

Sailor Moon H Order of the Phoenix (289)

Sailor Moon H Half Blood Prince (222)

Eden's Deception (167)

Out of Reach (150)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! although if I'm busy or feeling down it can take me a while. Sometimes I forget.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I still think What Even is 3 Minutes takes the cake. Or I'll be Your First if You'll be my Last

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I Heard the Comm on Christmas Morn and Parent Trap

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Unfortunately I've gotten hate on fics since I started writing them... and it's become just something I expect to happen. Sometimes it's funny. Sometimes it confuses me. Sometimes it makes me sad. It really depends...

The memorable haters:

There was the delightful Fanfiction.net reviewer who got pissed i was "making everybody gay" (that was funny actually). I forget if they were the same person who flamed me when Mcgonagall and Hooch kissed under some mistletoe. I digress. They thought queering up the canon was like sinful or whatever. I was delighted to disagree and make the story even queerer.

Another person cussed me out for magically restraining Sailor Plutos time travel powers so my plot would work and for making her have feelings about it. aparently mad the senshi were not all powerful deus exmachinas who never feel feelings... That one stung. That was the reason I left FFN.

Hate because in Sailor Moon H, Harry Potter was not the main character.

Hate that I made a magic bio baby for the magical lesbians. (I can't have a biobaby with my wife irl, can't I at least let the fantasy girlies have one!)

Hate for including C/7 in a story

...I wouldn't call it hate for the fic but I have had an uncomfortable amount of commenters who hate on Chakotay any time I have him involved with Seven / don't have him grovel to Kathryn / really any time I let him advocate for how he's been hurt... at first comments like this stressed me out because i worried i had not written the character sufficiently sympathetic. But then Parent Trap breached containment and I got enough comments to be able to see I had definitely written the character fine... it was just that some people were always just rooting for a "Chakotay falls over himself to apologize to Janeway for not immediately dating her" storyline that... I'm not sorry 😅 I'm never going to write that. The older I get the more I feel like both of J/C just need therapy! They've been through so much trauma. Their feelings are valid (yes, even for other people).

Parent Trap breaching containment also meant that when I hit an irl rut and couldnt get in the writing headspace for a bit, a bunch of - sincerely, well meaning - fans got into their heads to start a commenting campaign to get me to update. I heard about it and panicked (i had bad experiences that year of getting people who only commented "update soon" and those conversely stressed me out and made me not want to write - I love fic writing for the conversations and community... so it made me feel like readers thought i was just a content vending machine). so just the thought of potentially getting an avalanche of guests, well meaning or not, begging me to update made me lock commenting until the fic was done. I wound up deciding after that that since "update soon" requests were becoming a lot more frequent that I'd consider before posting whether getting them would hurt my ability to finish. So most of the time now if I know a fic is going to reach a bigger potential community, I don't start posting it until it's almost done. That has had some upsides! (Im less dependent on positive feedback for motivation now!) and some downsides (no one comments on my fics with their theories anymore) but on a whole, a good decision.

Immediately after finishing Parent Trap I wrote Fever and got this amazing guest comment from someone who said (paraphrasing cuz i'm too busy to go find it) "Youre better than this. how dare you write this filth. J/C are better than this" that one had me laughing for days. But the comment did prompt me to create a second account later when I wrote a tentacle fic. At the time I worried i'd get a ton of similar flame comments from people who were subscribed to my main for other types of fic... but I am even feeling like that's unnecessary now. I write what I write! Yes, some of it is really dirty, weird smut. I'm not sorry.

Currently any time I post a Threshold AU fic an anon drops into my comments section in order to call me "Sick" and "Deranged"... they make me so sad I don't even make a quippy reply. I just delete them. I write that universe for my own wish fulfillment... Someday (soon, hopefully) I'm gonna have kids. And I am going to have to have conversations with them about who their biological dad is. Why they look like one mom and not the other, whether their non bio family love them even if theyre not blood related. I might have a kid who feels different from everyone else because they're queer or they're neurodivergent or they're some new alienating feeling I am totally unprepared for. and I'll need to help them navigate that.. Writing about hybrid salamander kids getting raised in a blended family is FUN. But more importantly... it helps me practice those situations. It comforts me to know that if the characters can figure this out in the AU then I can figure this out in real life! What the hell is sick and deranged about that!?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I write all sorts of smut. I post the stuff that doesn't totally mortify me once i've gotten out of whatever mood had me writing the smut in the first place.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I have exactly two crossovers to my name: Sailor Delta and Sailor Moon H. I think on the basis of word count alone Sailor Moon H (>500,000) is definitely the craziest.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I consider the unlicensed use of the AO3 archive for ChatGPT and similar LLMs theft. (and there are several court cases pending that are also seeking to address whether it is legally theft as it pertains to published fiction and newspapers). The canon creators of the fandoms I write for aren't allowed to make money by using uncredited ideas pulled from my fanfiction (just like I am not allowed to make money from writing fic with their copyrighted settings and characters) and i continue to be apalled that ChatGPT and other LLMs think they can get away with using others copyrighted ideas without permission. Especially that they can take advantage of people who cant profit off their own work.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No but i would be open to it!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! Once with @magdalenejaneway, once with @jellybeansarecool and once with @trekflower and all three were fantastic!

Most of what I write for Threshold AU is also increasingly collaborated on a great deal by the AU creators and a few other folks. It's been going for over 2 years now and doing that more and more has enabled us all to drop more references to previous fics and to create a more cohesive body of fic for the AU. in general its just been so fun and fulfilling to make these stories with other people who are as invested in the characters as me and it just fills me with joy. I'm really grateful for you guys.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

On the one hand J/C have inspired over 50 fics, But on the other I have also been loving Sailor Moon and those ships since before I knew what fandom or shipping were. And really the only reason J/C inspire more fic is that all the sailor moon characters got a happy ending.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I never want to give up on a WIP...

but I am in knots about what all to do with Out of Reach.

Out of Reach is a St:Prodigy S1 AU where Chakotay has amnesia and doesn't remember anything from his time on Voyager, all the while he and Kathryn are in a situationship with a baby.

There's two questions I never figured out how to answer: 1. Does he get his memories back. If so, how much and what enables it. and 2: Do he and Kathryn stay together?

On the memories front. saying he never recovers seems unfair to the character. But saying he magically does thanks to 24th century science feels cheap and disrespectful - to the reality of real memory loss and to the plot that built up so much tension around this. Saying he gets back some or more over time is more realistic, but left me uncertain of where exactly to end the story. Tying his retrieval of memories to Kathryn also tied me up in knots. On the one hand they're in love and thats romantic. on the other hand the optics of his recovery totally dependent on one person is icky.

I also found the baby really annoying to have there by the end - I still think he's cuteeee i really do!!! - it's just... he makes the "we should stay together and try to figure this out" answer a bit too convenient 😅. and he complicates Kathryns reluctance to restart their relationship. The more she resists, the more callous she seems (deliberately not trying to patch things up with her kid's father) when i really just want to focus on her fears that Chakotay would be happier without her and that even if they restart their romance, she might lose him again on a future mission. It's ironic because i originally created the baby to ensure she wouldnt just run away from her fears. And now hes contributing to my difficulty ending the fic...

Actually the more I think on it, my real problem is I could write my way out of this, but I cant do it in only one or two chapters and that makes me feel tired. i was sorta hoping to wrap that fic up. 😅🙈

16. What are your writing strengths?

Imagery has always been a strength for me. But i think I'm also getting really good at action scenes too.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Oneshots.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Only if it was information i wanted the reader to understand but not the POV character.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

W.I.T.C.H way back when I was 15.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Universe to Mend - I even have a few sequel or companion novel ideas to come after it.

This has gone on a while... 😅 - thank you for tagging me and letting me ramble! i'll tag anyone else who wants to answer! have at it.

#writing asks #elephantwrites

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therealprismcat · 4 months

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WIP tag game!

tagged by @wario-speedwagon ty for tagging me!!

Rules: In a new post, post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it!

here's a ton of shit from my notes app and docs. some of them have actual words done and others are just outlines or vague story ideas that havent been started or even outlined yet, but i vaguely know where im going with them

"doll" (thats it i couldnt figure out what to name it) like half an outline, a bit of maths to figure out the timeline but thankfully it has an actual storyline.

"flowers for the sick and dead" a wip one-shot ive been working on for over a month and still am not even halfway through with

"all good things ch2" my wip longfic (probably.. dont even know where its going) thats on hiatus pretty much because it confuses me.

"get out of my house" unfinished omori crackfic from almost a year ago

"fbc au" no outline, no words written down, but its been through so much and i do want to talk about it

"phasmophobia" one shot turned into a fic with many little chapters instead. no words written down but like half an outline.

"blackjack au" multichapter fic with nothing but half a story going for it rn

"ouroboros" old fic idea that got rebranded into something completely different, but i kept the old ver because i still wanna write it one day

"the incredibly strange little girl ch3" literally just the third chapter of one of my crackfics i for some reason havent finished yet

i wish i had more mutuals who wrote fanfics, so im just going to tag a bunch of my mutuals who have fanfic author vibes and hope im right. if i didnt tag you tho, feel free to join in anyway @p13rr0t @jpuff9 @fastrainbowdas @puppetkirbee

#tag game

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justanotherhh · 2 months

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ramble: thing is, im actually not sold on huskerdust as a romantic couple atm (in future? who knows) but i do like whatever foundations loser baby set up for their general dynamic as a whole and i can work from that with whatever direction the canon chooses to go in, which is proooobably romantic, considering the cues (but again, who knows)

this as a microcosm of general things that at times have me go "hmmm" about the first season, which most of the time (not always, but mostly) comes down to pacing. husk isn't a character with much focus in s1. his dynamic with angel, while not not set-up could be seen as a "yeah, we'll put those two together," rather than feeling totally organic. most of husk's and angel's dynamics before loser baby have been about husk not wanting angel in his space and then not much (anything?) between ep4 and ep8 that wasn't at least partly group-based

i could pick up on other non-huskerdust related things that came out of the blue and went quite quickly, especially in the latter half of the season, where the jump from "six months" to "one month" to "now" felt kind of jarring

but in the end 8 episodes is indicative of general show culture these days where it seems everyone has to fight tooth and nail to even get that much per season, when really hazbin hotel s1 wanted at least 12 episodes in order to have more time to breathe and set up character dynamics not at breakneck speed, and heck, maybe 8 was the original goal. i doubt it though, hiiighly doubt it

all this to say i have a lot of grace for wherever the show does take things if it's trying to push so much into whatever time it's been offered with the ever-hanging (but perhaps slightly less-so post-strikes?) uncertainty of cancellation after 2 seasons. the conditions to create a story and then get that story out there... suck. and it's harder for 8 episodes (or even 12) to hide flaws than a 22 episode season of yore (with its own issues as construct but still... easier to disguise blemishes and take their time)

on the flipside helluva boss seems content to just keep trucking at whatever speed it's on, doing pretty much what it wants to do, but without any Big backing a la amazon and with everyone involved doing 100 other projects at the same time. so... sometimes it does things well, sometimes less-well, but overall just... vibing. 25ish min episode at a time every 3-5 months. granted i haven't experienced the personal pain of that yet, having started it in january, but on it goes and i'll be suffering soon enough

for very different reasons im pretty forgiving of pacing-related stuff that might (has and probably will again) come up in either show. more than anything they've got very visible constraints, so im happy to fill in the blanks with fandom -- for example if huskerdust is written as romantic by the end without developing properly, ive seen ample cool ideas and fanarts that give it more texture and breadth and/or i'll simply look at other things with the characters that aren't shipping them together -- because mainly they're just very fun shows with a bunch of messy queer characters in them, with some great singing and voice acting. the universe of these stories is so open and welcoming to play in, im just in it for a good time

also, in the end, no they're not that deep (except for when they want to be), but they're also a still-rare example of queer genre tv for adults that isn't that deep, but still incorporates relevant queer narrative themes in fun, moving, often complex ways, especially genre tv where lead characters tend to be queer until proven otherwise and this queerness in and of itself is well-written and nuanced. like yeah, i am in it for plots that hopefully stick the landing in the end, but if they don't they were still a very fun, inviting time that had me as a target audience and this a rare privilege to have with a bit of fun fiction

what am i saying in the end? loser baby is a banger, thank you for the song and all the other songs. i think angel dust and fizzarolli should hang and make out and talk about terrible bosses sometime, but the likelihood of these shows having a crossover with all the weird copyright stuff around these days is probably minimal. it's fine. (argh)

(im saying this post also isn't that deep)

#hazbin hotel #helluva boss #altho angel dust and fizz would break on each other like matchsticks... rip to you both #i think ultimately what im saying is: i really like these shows #having a good time with them #and they'd have to go Really off the rails for me to not have a good time with them

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asexualzoro · 1 year

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it’s my 22nd birthday today, and you know what that means...

Lew Writes Wrapped 2022!

its virtually all third life this time, most of which have not been posted on main before. woe, the full weight of my third life obsession be upon ye

blood god, mortal red

(Jan, 1.2k, DSMP, oneshot) (link)

one of the Many minecraft execution fics i have written in my life, technoblade anvil edition

not to start this post off with making myself sad, but man, i miss him.

i remember writing this one all in one sitting at work in january. i think i did a pretty good job with it from an artistic standpoint, and as an analytical piece, i think i hit the mark perfectly. that said, i don’t think i could reread it now. i do think it was fun as a writing exercise to force like, 5 seconds irl to stretch out into a thousand words

yes, the only way out is down

(April, 1.2k, 3L, oneshot) (link)

another minecraft execution fic, third life rendog edition!

IM SO PROUD OF THIS ONE. im so fond of it it’s probably my favorite third life oneshot. ren’s execution makes me fucking rabid and this is just the most direct expression of that.

what’s funny is i actually remember being pretty dissatisfied with this fic when i finished it--there was a lot of stuff i wanted to hit on that i just couldnt swing around to--but when i stepped away from what i wanted it to be and looked at what it was, i realized i liked it a lot

the rhythm of cold fists

(May, 2.6k, 3L, onehsot) (link)

sometimes you get so worked up about the idea scar threw the finale of third life that you have to write a bunch of frenzied words on it

this one is funny bc i think its got the second most hits of any of my third life fic, but the comment number is really low comparatively. i mostly just had fun making the transcript of this scene and then fleshing that out into a full ‘novelization,’ it was a neat writing exercise! i don’t think anything in particular stands out about this one, but i’m happy with it overall

Wooden Mausoleum

(May, 3.8k, 3L, oneshot) (link)

Sometimes you get so worked up about the idea of the unactualized betrayal plotline of the most loyal man in the series that you have to write a bunch of frenzied words about it

okay this is going to sound bad but i keep forgetting i wrote this. i dont know why. i like this fic! one of my favorite paragraphs i wrote all year is in it! and yet??? i dunno.

id love to write a different martyn wins au where the betrayal isnt the sort of ‘mercy kill’ suggested in this fic, bc i still have not recovered from the unrealized betrayal plot. someday i’ll write a martyn wins au where he Means to win

i... still feel something is sort of off with the way this fic ends, but i think ive felt that about a lot of the fic/scene endings ive written of late. i think that ending scenes/fics is just ill have to work on this upcoming year!

might be best to not look back

(Oct, 2.7k, 3L, oneshot) (link)

i’m starting to think all my oneshots are just me getting possessed by different parts of the third life. anyway i had a point to prove about scar throwing, and what might happen were he not being wildly unsubtle about throwing

i can write essays on this fic it makes me feel insane. i HAVE written an essay on it already just recently. tbh, this fic itself IS an essay written for the purpose of analyzing the penultimate third life scene. i have and could and will write more essays on the penultimate third life. this is all i have to say to avoid making this a 1k word post

i think i did what i wanted to pretty well? it was sort of confusing, by virtue of trying to talk about a point your viewpoint character won’t acknowledge, but it was a fun piece over all

missing or obstructed

(Oct-present, 6.3k, 3L, ongoing) (link)

post third life fic but only grian and ren remember, featuring so many sleep/dreaming metaphors, because i lucid dream and have insomnia and it does a lot to me as a person

missing or obstructed has 14.7k words written but i havent fuckin posted most of it bc i got derailed by lamplight. missing i am so sorry i miss you so much but youve been obstructed. i am really excited for how the rest of this goes but i think i have to finish and completely exorcize lamplight from my head before i can go back to it in earnest. i DID post another chapter at 10pm yesterday so i had more of it to include in this wordcount tho,

missing or obstructed has been a lot of fun to write bc i lvoe stupid metaphors. it has sucked to write because it’s forced me to come up with worldbuilding shit for the watchers which has been so much more difficult than i thought. it’s been fun again cuz i love worldbuilding. it’ll be super fun when i finish the current scene i’m sitting and get to introduce martyn pov. i lvoe writing Martyn pov

Lamplight AU

(Nov-present, 20k, 3L/LL, series) (link)

renchanting dnd au. i put ren in a lantern. what else do you need

wadda hell.

i cannot even begin to like--lamplight was literally supposed to be just 20 Questions and thats it, i wasn’t going to write more, but people liked it so much that i was like “sure, i’ll write a bit more” and you guys have been??? so kind. the amount of enthusiasm this fic has received thru kind tags/comments, asks and interest, and even art??? is equal parts deeply humbling and also incredibly likely to give me a god complex. this fic has been so much fun to write and my readers are the whole reason, i cant wait to show you what i have in store for the rest of it

six sentence sunday challenge

i also started a challenge back at the end of march of this year over on @driflew called Six Sentence Sunday. the rules are simple: every sunday, post six sentences you wrote that week.

i didn’t make it every week, but i made it a great deal of them. on occasion, i even posted 12 sentences the week after missing my six, meaning some weeks counted for two.

my six sentence sunday tag on that blog has 28 posts from the year! considering there’s only 52 weeks in a year, i started three months late, and a few of those weeks are actually two, i feel pretty good about the amount of weeks i made. not every week, but basically any week i didn’t have a good excuse not to complete my six sentences. it kept me writing all year, if only a little bit at a time, and i’ll be keeping up with it for sure!

to finish out,

i passed my writing amount from last year (25k) by over 10k words! my total number for this year doesnt even count the 7k or so from missing or obstructed i havent posted, plus an uncounted few hundred words of unposted snippets for lamplight. i’m really happy with everything i’ve done this year!

which… this year i wrote and posted 37,800+ words!

thank you to everyone who has supported my writing all year, as always, it means the world to me. happy birthday to me, and thank you to you for reading!

(birthday wishes and/or reblogs appreciated!)

#lew writes #lew writes wrapped

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grasslandgirl · 2 years

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HELLO oh I am :eyes emoji: at every single thing on that list, your wips sound so. cool! absolutely dying to hear more about leverage ot3 amnesia ideas & juno steel and the case of the lost memories, whatever you are interesting in sharing <3

oh with JOY will i talk about these jade, with JOY!!

i'm gonna put this below a cut cause i'm gonna answer and give snips for both and it's gonna get LONG bc i Cannot Shut Up xox

for the leverage ot3 amnesia au i dont have a TON written, it was more just a collection of amnesia au ideas for all three of them that i was putting down so as not to forget them- i'm such a sucker for amnesia aus where the concrete memories are gone, but the sense memories and the gut instincts, and the muscle memory remains; and i think that trope carries over really interestingly to the leverage ot3-- parker who feels herself physically relaxed around these two strange men she doesn't know, eliot who instinctively lets these strangers touch him because some part inside of him he can't remember knows they won't hurt him, etc etc

i haven't written a ton of it, but i do have a dash of eliot pov i'll slide your way <33

Everything’s fuzzy. Eliot hates when things are fuzzy. He blinks against the crust in his eyes, but whatever room he’s in is clinically bright. His mouth is dry and his whole body is a single dull ache- heavy medication. Someone’s drugging him. In the back of his mind, Eliot’s furious about that; wants to rage until everything is burned out of his system and he can think clearly again, but he can’t remember why. Why he’s- wherever he is. Why he hates mind-numbing medication so badly. Why he needs it in the first place. The alarms in the back of his head are clanging- telling him, danger, threats, wake up, get up, fight your way out- but Eliot has to fight to open his eyes all the way. He’s in a hospital. And- yeah, okay, that makes sense; even if it ignites the same anxious-angry pit in his stomach the meds do. Glaring halogen ceiling lights and clinical white walls and a softly beeping heart monitor and an IV plugged into his arm (he fights the urge to rip it out, if only for the moment) and- a man. Sitting in the chair next to him.

:)))) eliot pov my beloved....... i should write more leverage fic, huh?

and then SIMILARLY juno steel and the case of the missing memories is ALSO an amnesia au ksjvnskfjvnsfb

the concept was that at some point vaguely s3 on the carte blanche, juno gets a bad hit and loses all his memories of basically the plot of the show- so he can remember everything before the case of the murderous mask- but he doesn't remember anything with the kanagawas, or meeting nureyev, or the martian pill, or losing his eye, etc etc etc

so he wakes up on this ship- off mars for the first time in his life- still in a pre-s1 headspace, with only one eye and a bunch of people he doesn't know. and rita :)

tbh i only got like. a couple eps into s3 of junoverse and then never got caught back up (whoops) so like. idk what really happens during s3 and this fic was a big project in terms of like. going back to s1 juno characterization and foiling that against who s3 juno is and who s3 peter is, and how this kind of regression effects their relationship (or lack thereof, at the outset of the fic, bc they're not together yet) and while i did and do think it's really interesting, it was also like. a big thing to undertake and i got wary of like. characterizing juno effectively in it? and i wanted to slow roll him regaining his memories in bits and pieces and was having trouble pacing that effectively, and so it ended up on a back burner i never returned to </3 alas

but maybe someday when i finally go back and relisten to and catch up on tpp i'll go back and wirte more of it! in the mean time, have some snips:

He heard soft footsteps, almost silent, sliding across the hard floors of the ship behind him. Juno froze on instinct, senses sharpening to a knife’s point as he tried to focus on the steps over the blasting audio from Rita’s stream. If Rita noticed Juno stiffening, she didn’t say anything. Even though Rita had told him, again and again, that he could trust his fellow crew members aboard the Carte Blanche, that they were a family, Juno couldn’t shake the paranoia he’d known his whole life. He didn’t trust easy, he’d learned that the hard way over and over again as all the people he’d let into his life had betrayed or abandoned him. Except Rita. If he’d ever known how, Juno had long since forgotten how to be a part of a family, and this motley crew of criminals was no exception. The footsteps neared, and Juno’s mind- as fuzzy and slow-moving as it still was, even three days after whatever accident he’d had- spun, trying to remember where the closest gun was, just in case. In his periphery, Juno saw the figure approaching. Tall, with taller hair and narrow shoulders- Ransom. Some of the tension dropped from Juno’s shoulders. He still didn’t trust Ransom, there was something off about the guy, something about how he watched Juno and spoke so carefully around him that made Juno think he was hiding something. But there was something- a gut feeling Juno had about him. A deja vu kind of trust and comfort and uncertainty. Juno didn’t remember where it came from, but it was there. He trusted Ransom more than anyone else on the ship, other than Rita, even though that wasn’t saying much. Ransom came close enough to catch Juno’s eye. Raised his eyebrow in a silent question- the same one every person on the ship asked him every time they saw him: do you remember me yet? Juno shrugged, trying not to dislodge Rita too much. Ransom nodded, his expression never changing from the smooth, impassive mask he always wore. It itched at Juno, that impassivity. He wanted to know what was under it, wanted to know what Ransom was really thinking in that pretty head of his. The only people who were that careful and inscrutable were people with something to hide. Juno was a PI- he should know. As Ransom turned to walk away, Juno realized that the closest entrance to Ransom’s quarters was on his blind side. That he’d gone the long way around the ship to enter and exit within view of Juno’s periphery. Something uncertain and heavy and familiar squeezed in Juno’s stomach.

[i can't help another snippet, it's taking everythig i have not to give like three more on top of this, i forgot how good this au was skjfnvsfb sav from two years ago was crazy]

“Juno,” Ransom said, his voice infuriatingly even. “Ransom-” that was the other thing. The other muscle-sense-memory bullshit that made Juno’s head ache. It felt- wrong, every time he called him Ransom. Every time Juno saw him, or thought about him or started to say his name, he had to correct himself, make himself say Ransom; instead of the other name he had rattling around in his head. He didn’t know where it came from, or why he associated it so strongly with Ransom, but Juno was ready to fucking know who Peter Nureyev was, and why he could’t stop thinking about him. Patience wasn’t ever a strong suit for Juno. He bit the bullet. “Why do I have another name for you in my head, Ransom?” There. The flash of- of something, of emotion Juno had been waiting for. It was brief, something Juno might’ve missed if he hadn’t been looking so closely for any kind of reaction, but it was there. Shock, uncertainty, grief, flickered across Ransom’s face before settling back into his perpetual inscrutability. “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean, Juno,” Ransom said, but there was a tremor, barely there, under his composed tone. Juno had shaken him, and he was going to get answers, damnit, come hell or high water. “Really?” Juno challenged, and he’d forgotten a lot, but he hadn’t forgotten this: the chase, the interrogation, cornering somebody into admitting and confessing and telling Juno what he wanted- what he needed- to hear. “Then who the hell is Peter Nureyev?” There it was again; the flickering, uncertain emotion, the disappearance of Ransom’s composure, the twist in Juno’s stomach that meant he was onto something. “I- Juno, do you-” “No.” Ransom’s face fell, if infinitesimally. “I don’t- remember. Not really, but there’s… I don’t remember you, but I look at you and my brain says Nureyev, and I don’t fucking know why.”

:))) i just reread this whole wip- and it's almost 7k long- bc i didnt remember a lot of it and. oohohohoho. god. i was deranged.

thank you again for sending in this ask, jade!! sorry (not sorry) it got so long skjfvnksfjbn

send me the name of a wip off of this list and i'll reply with a snippet and/or my thoughts on it !!

#asks #tpp #leverage #brrbrbrrrrr head full had FULL

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swsequelsalt · 2 years

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The Mehness of Obi-Wan

Now that I’ve seen the whole thing, the “Obi-Wan Kenobi” series was... well, at times it was fine. And at other times it was very irritating. Overall, I’d say “mild miss.”

It would’ve benefitted a LOT from being cut down to about two hours in length. Maybe two and a half. So: A movie. That could’ve been cool.

Sundry Thoughts Under the Cut:

- When they first announced that Vader would be in this and Christensen would be returning, I figured there was only ONE reason to bring Obi-Wan and Vader back together before their fateful meeting in Episode IV: You can finally explain that moment in Return of the Jedi when Vader tells Luke that “Obi-Wan once thought as you do.” In other words, you tell the story of Obi-Wan trying to save Vader’s soul and failing. It’s been the most infamous question mark hanging over the continuity of the OT since 2005. But guess what? This Disney+ series makes absolutely no attempt to address it. Which boggles my mind.

- You’ve probably heard by now that the real stars of this show are Ewan MacGregor as Obi-Wan and Moses Ingram as the new character of Reva, aka “Third Sister” in the Inquisition. And I can’t fault the performances on these two whatsoever. They do amazing work throughout. Both of them are clearly invested in these characters and completely bringing their best to the table. It’s just that the material isn’t always worthy of them.

- Obi-Wan spends half the series as a total fuck-up until the moment when he instantly, inexplicably isn’t anymore.

Remember how, at the end of Revenge of the Sith, Yoda was going to tell Obi-Wan how to commune with Qui-Gon, and Yoda said Qui-Gon would then train him while he was in hiding? Well, when this series opens, we quickly learn that Obi-Wan hasn’t managed to speak to Qui-Gon even ONE time. He hasn’t seen him or heard him at all. And he also hasn’t trained whatsoever. For ten. fucking. years.

This subsequently leads into him spending three and a half episodes just completely sucking. He doesn’t know how to successfully disguise himself, he doesn’t know how to keep up a cover story, he doesn’t know how to fight with a lightsaber or even use the force anymore. He’s total rubbish! Except, weirdly, when it comes to guns? He actually kinda kicks ass with a blaster now — you know, the weapon Obi-Wan always considered to be “uncivilized”? No idea when he started training heavily on those things, but ok.

ANYWAY, this all reaches Peak Embarrassment when Obi-Wan confronts Vader for the first time. He draws his lightsaber, but then he gets scared and opts to simply run away. Or he TRIES to run away. Like a methodical slasher villain, Vader doesn’t even have to run to magically catch up. Eventually, Obi-Wan has no choice but to very poorly attempt to block Vader’s lightsaber attack. Without explaining the entire climax, suffice it to say that ol’ Ben gets REAMED.

But then the fourth episode comes along. Near the start of the episode, we see Obi-Wan trying to pull a small object towards himself with the Force, but he can’t do it. He can only bring it like halfway across the table with difficulty. But then his mission to sneak into an underwater facility begins, and... he just instantly gets his mojo back! He can use his lightsaber like a pro. He can deflect blaster bolts back at stormtroopers. He can perform mind tricks. It’s not explained at all; he just suddenly is great at everything again. And he continues to be completely badass at all things for the rest of the series without anyone ever trying to explain the shift. What the fuck is that?!

- Sadly, Reva isn’t all that well-written for a bunch of reasons. Moses Ingram is bringing her A-game, and they let her down. She’s got a cool backstory and awesome underlying motivations, yet her actions often make no sense.

In the third episode, she somehow easily senses the exact building where Obi-Wan is hiding amidst an entire town - when even Vader himself didn’t sense it or find it, just walked right past it! And then she instantly figures out that this same building contains a secret door that leads to an “underground railroad”-esque hiding spot for Jedi - even though numerous imperials have been through here and seen nothing at all, and there are no people hidden within (so she can’t be sensing any life forms).

In the fifth episode, she finally is given the opportunity to do what she’s been pursuing for most of her life. All of her careful planning has led to this. So she naturally waits until the worst moment and takes action as stupidly as possible. .... Maybe the pressure of having decades of her life lead up to a single moment in time just got the better of her?

The worst instance of all this, though, are the CRAZY leaps of logic she takes in the very last episode. Based on some broken-up audio she hears at the tail end of the fifth episode, she somehow figures out things that she should have no way of knowing. But of course, she’s completely right. And she then pursues an objective that makes no sense and is completely out of character for who she’s established to be. Until at the end of the episode, she suddenly stops and... I guess remembers what her motivation actually fucking was? God, it is INFURIATING. If she ever appears in this franchise again, I hope they can try to give us some sort of retroactive justification for her actions in that last ep.

- The show would be a lot shorter if it didn’t spend so much time spinning its wheels. Sometimes they just repeat plot beats and sequences in a new setting, presumably because they figure the setting will be enough to make it seem different.

In Episode 2, Obi-Wan must rescue little Leia from captivity and then evade a bunch of stormtroopers hunting them while they make their way to a ship to escape. In Episode 4, Obi-Wan must rescue little Leia from captivity and then evade a bunch of stormtroopers hunting them while they make their way to a ship to escape.

In Episode 5, Obi-Wan and the nascent Rebellion are cornered by the Empire, and Obi-Wan determines that he must appear to give himself up in order to serve as distraction that will let the Rebels get away. Ah! but then, in Episode 6, Obi-Wan and the nascent Rebellion are cornered by the Empire, and Obi-Wan determines that he must appear to give himself up in order to serve as a distraction that will let the Rebels get away.

- Speaking of the actors, Hayden Christensen does amazing work in the Vader suit. I know it’s basically just a form of mime, but his movements look so powerful and threatening throughout. He also gets to reprise pre-burn Anakin in some flashback images courtesy of some digital de-aging, so that was cool. And on the topic of Anakin/Vader, I can’t believe how outstanding James Earl Jones still sounds at age 91?! I saw some rumors online that he might’ve been digitally enhanced beyond just the usual Vader reverb, but... either way, holy shit.

- One of the best moments in the show is probably Ewan’s reaction when he hears that Anakin/Vader is actually still alive. But I must admit that I was confused that Obi-Wan would be stunned by this information. I mean... he sees that Palpatine was calling Anakin “Lord Vader” even before their Mustafar duel. Did he forget that name, or did he somehow just never hear about the existence of a “Darth Vader” terrorizing the damn galaxy?

- I wasn’t too sure about Vivien Lyra Blair as Leia when the series started, but she establishes that she’s up to it fairly early on. I was ultimately quite happy and impressed with her.

- Lola is an adorable design, and also VERY marketable. But if we’re going to be seeing droids hanging around the Organa residence, shouldn’t we have seen R2 and/or Threepio... ?

- I definitely did not expect Owen and Beru to get some pretty badass scenes? And actually do some fighting? Unexpected, but the writers and fight choreographers made it make sense. Although both Owen and Beru are willing and capable of standing up for themselves, the show doesn’t try to make them secret warriors or anything. They’re still just a couple of people trying to defend a farm for their family’s sake.

- I can’t argue much with the final battle between Obi-Wan and Darth Vader. It’s cool to see. It would’ve been much more resonant if they had used “Battle of the Heroes” or “Duel of the Fates” in the score somewhere, though.

- Before the final battle, Obi-Wan says this is it - this is where one of them will have to die for the other to live. And yet! When Obi-Wan kicks Vader’s ass, he just looks him in the eye and... leaves. He leaves this former friend of his, who he saw casually killing innocent civilians one by one back in Episode 3, to continue his reign of terror. Obi-Wan, you absolute fool. You’re now basically responsible for everyone Vader kills for the next ten years! You know that, right?! You stood there and watched Vader walk down a line of innocent civilians’ houses as he killed them one by one in an attempt to draw you out. You KNOW what this dickcheese is capable of! Christ... if the writers didn’t have any logical excuse for why this would happen, they should’ve rethought the whole goddamn sequence.

#obi-wan kenobi #disney+ series #obi-wan series #obi-wan kenobi series #star wars negativity

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grossrottie · 1 year

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Hey it's me! I was just looking through the most recent food related reblogs and I just wanted to say you have awesome taste in food. It's been a while since Ive agreed with someones taste in food so much because lets be honest, pineapple on pizza and pizza subs are both amazing and no one can tell me otherwise, plus even the other food items I have similar feelings for. Dunno this was random but I just found it funny wanted to let you know you have good taste in not only ships but food too! Anyways hope you are doing well right now and also if you don't mind me asking, how is the Crow x Squirrel fic coming along? I'm just curious as to how your doing and there's anything you wanna share? If not then its fine but I know you like talking about requests so I thought I might be the one to ask about the request. But anyways hope your doing well and love the reblogs lately, due to them I know I realize I know nothing about rats and mice but yeah hope you like this message and hope to hear back when you can!

There’s nothing with random, and I appreciate this ask so much omggg!!! I’ve been thinking abt it for a bit and trying to think of a good answer!

First off, food twinnnssss!!! It’s so cool to learn that others have the same taste as me, we’re pals forever now! /lh pineapple on pizza and pizza subs are so good, YOU have awesome taste as well!!! (In food and ships, of course!)

I’m doing well, what about you? c:

The Squirrel/Crow fic has progressed slightly, but I haven’t gotten into the groove of writing it yet. So far I’ve whittled the ideas down to one I’m gonna go with, but I’m still getting caught on the details (who likes who first? is the feather-crow crush still canon? do they both know they like each other, or does one of them figure it out in the moment?)

One version of a vague outline idea:

Squirrelpaw has a crush on Crowpaw

Crow has a crush on Feathertail

Squirrel sneaks off one night in the tribe cat’s territory (during the six-cat journey) bc she’s pent up. (It’s a smut fic but imma try to be not too lewd when explaining)

Crow cant sleep and goes for a walk. He notices Squirrel’s voice and thinks, then starts to walk towards the noise, worried that she’s hurt. He thinks he hears his voice being called.

He stumbles across her and is surprised, but casually offers to assist her (windclan cats are a bit more relaxed than thunderclan when it comes to mating and relationships) “unless you want me to get brambleclaw?” he offers genuinely.

Squirrel is flustered and confused. “why would I want—“ she realizes that crow didn’t hear her saying his name moments before he came into view. (he did, he just assumed he misheard) “oh, right.”

Then my writing peters out and I’m not sure where to go. Perhaps he develops a crush on her as he ‘helps’ her? Perhaps he realizes that while he admires Feathertail, he loves the back-and-forth banter that squirrel and him have.

But I’m still not sure if it fits at all. I could make it two sided, or one sided, or mutual pining, or something else but I’m a bit stuck.

I’ve written a little bit of a bunch of different ideas, but I can’t lock onto one.

Sorry for the rambling!!! Long story short, too many options and not sure. The requester didn’t give much info aside from “crow/squirrel first time” so I’m really not sure where to go.

Do you have any thoughts abt it? :0 I’d love to hear!! /gen

#ajdhdjsdbfbdjfn #also ty for the ask!!!! I appreciate you and your comments so mfing much #ask to tag #nsft warning #ask #mine #crowfeather x squirrelflight

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moonsblack · 2 years

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major changes to clandestine meetings and stolen stares

okay, so for the past week i have been debating doing this, simply because it popped into my mind that i do want this fic to be long, but if i keep it at 3k words per chapter, it will end up being a bunch of chapters long. personally, i just didn’t want that. the idea that ill be at 100k words on chapter 30 just wasn’t it for me, you know? that’s really just a personal preference of mine and basically just me judging myself too harshly.

so, i condensed the chapters down. now the fic is 3 chapters long, instead of 6.

every chapter will have all of the POVs (i still might add more people’s, i haven’t decided yet). im really sorry for this change, I know it’s a big one, but to me it’s worth it. i really hope you guys understand <3

also, i will have to go back and change any possible errors this may have caused (mainly timeline errors). i will be doing this tomorrow. nothing about the plot so far will change!!! i just wanted to let you guys know that that’s what i’m doing incase you go back and reread and find the changes and get confused, you know?

i am extraordinarily excited for where this fic is going! this is definitely one of my favorite things ive written and i hope you guys are enjoying reading it as much as i am writing it!!

im sorry again and i love you all so much <33

#marauders #marauders era #fanfiction #fic: clandestine meetings and stolen stares

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futureseaempress · 6 months

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WIP Weekend Tag Game

I got tagged by @hypnostheory tyty bb

Rules: List your WIPs below (if you only write one fic at a time, feel free to include future WIPs/ideas!) then answer the following questions. Then, tag as many people as you have WIPs (or more). (If you're an artist or other non-fic fandom creator, questions can be found here!)

1. WIP List:

okay bear with me theres a bunch

DAVEKAT -the cowboy one -the waho one and/or the office one -first date/Nastygum -tire trouble part two -the nanny au -the sweet home alabama au -more Silver paint CODA -glory -some princes don’t become kings

FIRST PRINCE -the soulmates au -the omegaverse au -the actor au -the baby one -the hockey one -threes giving - bachelor party -the autism/self expression one

TMA -that last chapter of fanning the flame that was supposed to be about agnes and Jack and I just never fucking wrote anything for it

2. Which of your WIPs is currently the longest?

here in search of your glory for sure

3. Which WIP do you expect will end up the longest?

so if i ever finish it more silver paint is bound to be the longest

4. Which WIP is your favourite to write/the most enjoyable to write? Why?

oooo i love writing the kid fic echoed through my mind is rlly fun tbh i like the drama and doing something ive never written before is rlly fun

5. Which WIP do you find the most intimidating to write? Why?

ALL OF THEM but defo the sweet home alabama au bc i think about it allll the time

6. Which WIP do you experience the most self-doubt about. Why?

-the threesome one bc I have a rlly good idea for it but I’m convinced I’m gonna fall short bc I want it to be kind of long and I struggle with that

7. Which of your WIPs will you seek out a beta/sensitivity reader for? Why?

hya usually reads my stuff but uhhh the soulmate au for sure not bc of anything bad but bc it’s almost too quick and I need someone to help me like slow down and set the mood

8. Have any of your WIPs been struck by the curse of writer's block?

ALL OF THEM ACTUALY i kinda just black out and start typing jibberish when i get too stuck and usually it works itself out

9. Which WIP has your favourite OC? Tell us about them?

oh uh none of them. i suppose I’m gonna cheat and say the kid fic bc I’m playing with some characters who exist in name only and like I’ve written Philips kids as getting along with Shaan & Zahra’s and his youngest behave like Henry and Bea and June has a little girl who is just like Alex and Alex is going to have a daughter who is just like June

10. Which WIP is the sexiest?

i'm gonna say the actor au but thats just cause i have plans

11. Which WIP is the angstiest?

ooo I don’t do a lot of angst but I’m gonna say the threesome bc Alex is a Dingus in that one BUT MAYBE HOCKEY BC ITS SAD FOR OSCAR AND ARTHUR

12. Which WIP has the best characterisation (in your humble opinion)?

ummmmmmmm. I’m gonna say. The omegaverse one actually it blends canon and fantasy rlly well

13. Which WIP has the best scene setting (in your humble opinion)?

glory. the next chapter has like bits from my favorite concert stuff and I love it

14. Which WIP have you worked the hardest on?

I wanna say Glory but it could rlly go for any of them I think about them kind of all the time

15. Which WIP do you have the highest expectations for? Why?

the threesome one but that’s bc the idea is rlly good and I want to pull it off college aus are my favorite & should be easy cause I lived in a dorm from age 16-21 but still

16. Do you dream about any of your WIPs?

ummmmm no? mb? I think about them before bed to get to sleep tho

17. Do any of your WIPs have particular complexities that your other fics don't?

so I like putting different venues of communication in my fic it’s kind of my favorite thing to add and I like writing emotional break downs where the text changes and the vibe becomes rlly frantic

but complexities is a hard stone to lift maybe the hockey one bc they aren’t together yet? and I mostly write established stuff? or the omegaverse one for the same reason

18. Which WIP is the funniest or has the most humour?

probs the threesome but that’s just bc hya and I had fun telling each other about it

19. Do any of your WIPs contain outside POVs or a deep dive on a character other than the main ship? How are you finding that process?

NO LOL— maybe I should write something from Pez or Nora’s perspective for the threesome fic but that’s kind of cheating maybe Liam will get a chapter for funnies

20. Tell us one thing we don't know about one or more of your WIPs.

My college au has a fight over the custody of Nora’s Keurig.

I’m not going to be tagging anyone bc I’m dreadfully late but if anyone wants to do it bc they saw it here they should!

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hollandsangel · 1 year

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WIP tag/title game

rules ; post the names of all the files in your wip folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it

thank you for the tag @luciwritesstuff !! i need to be held accountable for the absurd amount of wips in my docs...i need a gun to my head.

no pressure tags! @ddejavvu @silkscream @sunshinesteviee

please send in an ask if you wanna know more about this stuff!! i need to be intrested in writing again lmao. (was just telling my bsf last night how i miss writing tragci love stories LOL)

steve harrington

in the midst/to live for the hope of it all (working title) (one shot; angst)

so cliche, we’ve all read it before but the trope is so GOOD. essentially reader is jealous and a little bit concerned about steve’s realtionship with nancy post break up. it’s been months, but they’re so close, and he even admitted that she was the one that changed him. it never used to bother you, you trust steve, he’s an amazing boyfriend. but things start to pile up, and the image of him confessing that she was always the picture of his future is seared into your memory.

but it’s not real (one shot; angst)

okay so this one i actually hastily wrote up a summary for last night at like two am. i haven’t started writing it at all so im just gonna show you what my docs look like half the time and copy paste what i typed up on my phone in the dark...

being in love with bestie steve but it’s unrequited

basically him driving you home and imagining the whole “you kiss me in your car you’re driving me home whatever”

BUT ITS NOT REAL AND HIS FEELINGS FOR YOU DON'T EXIST

so you watch him drive away and stare up at the sky and it starts to rain bc we’re dramatic here at hollandsangel

slay.

tom holland

...buckle up

at every table (one shot; fluff, prob some angst, smut)

this one i have started writing, but i’m not the biggest fan of the tone atm so i’m probably gonna switch a bunch of things up. here’s the summary i have at the top of the doc for this fic lol

BARTENDER TOM BUT HES A SINGLE DAD AND YOU MEET HIM ONE NIGHT WHEN YOU GO OUT WITH THE OTHER TEACHERS AND YOU LEARN HIS DAUGHTER IS IN THE OTHER FIRST GRADE CLASS !!1111!!!11!

there’s also this little prompt i have...

tom taking to haz, not knowing what to do bc he has to look after his daughter and put her first “well ofc you do mate, but you’re allowed to be a little selfish sometimes too, maybe this isn’t such a bad thing”

essentially this is my dream story. i’m really obssesed with the concept but i just. can’t. execute it. it’s literally been in my docs for MONTHS, like probably september of last year, i’m losing it.

perfume (one shot; smut with a little plot)

so this one is inspired by del water gap’s song perfume and is another one that’s been in the works since like august. ive started writing it up but it hasn’t really gone anywehre yet. it’s a def a work in progress but im excited bc i love this song. i think i just need to get back into writing for tom bc lately ive been feeling so...lost wiht him? like idk how to write him bc im so out of practice lol. ALL IN DUE TIME.

anyways, so this story is about tom lowkey lusting after friend!reader and when the whole gang goes out one night, he finally makes his move. everything i write is self indulgent. so.

okay, so the next three are literally just titles and have not been written at all. i just have the basic, vauge idea written under them bc i always get little ideas and then froget them whoops. i do plan on writing these...eventually but they’re pretty low on the priorities list.

when in rome (one shot; smut)

basically you’re on a hot couples get away and you get your period, thinking it ruins any chance of you and tom getting down but he proves you wrong

the extra (one shot; fluff)

this one is based off that tweet that all the extras were instructed not to talk to tom and when he went up to someone he told them he was sad no one would speak to him :(( literally sobbed my eyes out he’s the cutest man alive.

i have like two lines of text written for this LOL not even a summary.

the thunder is shaking the floor (one shot; smut)

i came up with this idea one week where it was super rainy in my town and never let go of it. it is rotting in my docs.

plans get ruined while you’re on vacation bc it’s raining. you make up for it. (basically fuck at a cabin resort while it pours outside and the windows are open)

bsf!tom (this one doesn’t have a title yet, but i love it sm, like i literally wish i had something going on in my head bc i’d love to churn this out. one shot; the holy trinity, fluff, angst, smut)

im giving you the unfiltered summary so you can how excited i was when i first came up with this lol

basically you have the worst luck with guys and you and tom get wine drunk to make you feel better and now he’s staying over and waking up with his hand under your boob and peeling himself away even tho he just wants to touch you and next thing you know he’s making love to you the way you deserve

UGH wait she scooches closer in her sleep and subtly moans his name under her breath

HE SHAKES HER AWAKE GENTLY AND HIS LOOKING OVER HER AND SHE SLOWLY OPENS HER EYES AND HE HUST WHISPERS “you were dreaming, you kept saying my name” AND THE TENSION IS SO THICK AND SHES JUST LIKE “oh..” AND THEN HE HESITATES A LITTLE AND KEANS CLODER THEN STOPS TO RESD GRR FACE THEN KISSES GER

UGH I FORGOT HOW GOOD IT WAS

director!tom (also no title or summary, just vibes. one shot; angst, smut)

remember sweet? very similar idea, might even throw some fake dating in there who knows, im crazy.

bottom of the glass (one shot; angst, fluff?? maybe??)

i dont have a summary written for this, just like two pages of text...it’s another bartender!tom moment (my guilty pleasure) and him and reader get into a fight and it’s all really angsty. i have a bit of dialoug that’s barely coherent but i’ll give it to you anyways,

“if you don’t want to move in with me, just say so! don’t be a fucking coward tom, this is an adult relationship, and i want to be able to talk about conflicts like adults.” your voice cracks a little bit, but you choke back the stubborn tears that threaten to spill over, “i don’t want to feel so stupid that i get wasted at you bar,” you get quieter, sheepish almost, because you know you hadn’t been acting very adult recently either.

“you know i love you right ? even that was hard to come to terms with-“

“what the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“that i’ve never done this before! i’ve never been in an ‘adult’ relationship and i’ve never been in love and i’ve never lived with a girl and i’m scared im gonna fuck it all up y/n” he flushes, face red with anger and sadness “so i’m sorry i clammed up, im sorry for what i said, i really didn’t mean it..i just got scared”

“and i know i didn’t make anything better but please just..i love you so much, and i know i’m making mistakes but im trying my best i swear”

feeling exeptionally exposed rn.... but this was fun!! i didn’t realize how many half started fics i had and it makes me feel like i still have good ideas!! hopefully i can get some of these out for you guys soon. let me know which ones you’re most looking forward to!!

#tom holland #steve harrington #wips #hollandsangel #tag game

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bitchassbucky · 3 years

Text

.raw

Word count: 1.3k

Warning/s: this chapter is pretty tame ngl. very toxic relationship dynamics, bit spicy, references to sex, dark!bucky x dark! reader, obsessive/manipulative tendencies, cyber and irl stalking (usage of tracking device), food and eating were mentioned several times

A/N: thank you @unsaltedalmonds for the idea of IT!Bucky wearing this shirt lmfao

follow the CTRL series:

i - .exe

ii - .avi

iii - .raw

iv - .png

v - .zip

CTRL playlist CTRL moodboard

The lunch rush is starting to pick up when you came into the restaurant Bucky had told you. The chitter-chatter of the patrons along with the live acoustic band drones on as you sit by the bar waiting for him.

It’s nice. The mood is casual and the atmosphere is light. Maybe if the al-fresco dining area isn’t too crowded, you’d pick a sunny spot.

Catching your reflection on a glassy surface, you fix your appearance, hoping that it isn’t too much or too little.

“You look great, don’t worry.” A voice behind you perks up and you turn—Bucky.

A genuine smile finds itself on your lips, “thanks, Bucky. How long have you been here?” You let your eyes gaze upon his form. Black bomber jacket, zipped up all the way, tight skinny jeans, and scruffy boots. He swapped his dress shirt with something casual and it’s somehow driving you nuts already.

He gestures backward to a free table a few feet away, “long enough to get a seat for us.”

Bucky then sees your eyes flick outside by the restaurant’s patio, “unless you wanna go al-fresco?”

“Oh my gosh,” you almost even give yourself an eye roll for that, “no—no, it’s okay. We can stay here.”

“C’mon, it’s okay. I’m sure someone would be willing to switch with us.”

Before you could protest further, Bucky already flagged down the hostess. Giving his best smile and a minuscule head tilt, he speaks, “Do you think we could get a seat out there? I think fresh air would do us good.”

Like any other woman—hell, even men—wouldn’t be able to resist Bucky and his charm, “yeah! Of course, anything for you and your girlfriend.” The hostess looks at you and beams, prompting you to smile back.

Do you even try to dismiss that claim when you caught how Bucky reacted?

—

Peals of laughter slip past your lips as Bucky unzips his jacket, revealing a tasteful shirt underneath, “Bucky, oh my god!”

He throws an apologetic look around as you keep laughing, your hands hitting the table repeatedly.

“Can you keep it down?” Even he was chuckling a bunch, “in my defense, I need to do my laundry.”

You calmed yourself down only to laugh again, happy tears springing to the sides of your eyes.

Bucky wants to relive this is forever. Making you laugh and cry from laughing too much.

Is this what love feels like?

Your presence to him is like ecstasy.

He never wants to leave your light.

Everything about you is addicting.

And the way you didn’t even try to dismiss when the hostess called you his girlfriend—you want him as much as he wants you.

—

Lunch turned into afternoon snacks and snacks turned to dinner.

You and Bucky almost went and turned every food place upside down, the waistbands of your pants getting snug as the sun sets by the avenue.

“I’m so full, oh my god.” You jokingly rubbed your tummy, sipping boba as you walked side by side.

“Says the person drinking boba tea?” Bucky smirks, his hair fashioned into a low bun, showing off his side profile, much to the delight of people passing by.

He’s a walking Greek statue and you’re with him.

Bucky makes you feel loved. Enough. Seen. Validated.

Is this what love feels like?

You in his presence feel like a warm hug.

Bucky changed you forever.

A rather rushing pedestrian knocked shoulders with Bucky, causing him to stumble back and you to hold him steady, “you good?”

He seemed pissed, the crease between his eyebrows prominent, “yeah. Sorry, I’m okay.”

And then there it was: the tug of something unknown yet strangely familiar. The sound of the traffic ceases as you and Bucky both gaze upon each other’s eyes, only drifting to the other’s lips.

The moment has never been this perfect. Fuck all your romantic comedies starring Kate Hudson, this is your story now.

“Can I kiss you?” Bucky asks tenderly. His hand brushing your hair away from your face.

“Yes.”

Without a moment’s notice, your lips met.

—

Hand in hand, you walked the streets feeling like you’re on the clouds. Sweet smiles, bashful giggles. Normally, you would protest against stealing kisses but not when it’s him.

“This is my place,” Bucky says, pointing towards a mid-rise apartment complex. The neighborhood wasn’t new to you; you often find yourself walking these very streets early in the mornings.

You haven’t had the moment to appreciate his art pieces when Bucky suddenly pinned you against the door, shutting it roughly as soon as you stepped into his apartment threshold.

His lips finding yours, nibbling. The kiss was anything but sweet—all teeth and tongues.

“You have no idea how much I’ve waited to do that.”

“Like a month?” You quipped, tugging the collar of his tee. Your arms draping past his shoulders as his hands rest on your hips.

“Yeah, sure, let’s say a month.”

Having you in his studio apartment was meant to be. You in his space was written in the stars. He can almost see you waking up on his bed with him cooking you breakfast. Making you a cup of coffee now that he knows how you like it: with cream and two sugars.

You took a seat on his large office chair and a vision of you riding him suddenly floods his brain. Hey, now’s not the time.

Him shaking his head into resetting sent the wrong message, “oh. I can’t sit there, or…?” You pull yourself up, metaphorically hitting yourself in the head for making such a presumption.

Maybe he’s that kind of person who doesn’t like someone all up in their space. Then why would he take you here?

“No, no, it’s fine. I just—don’t you think it’s a bit late?” Bucky forces a smile, rubbing his palm across his nape. The warm feeling was suddenly pulled out of him. Now he’s just standing in his house with an acquaintance.

You suddenly felt small, minuscule, and very, very stupid. “Oh. Yeah, uh, I should probably get going.”

“What about a drink?” Bucky’s internally panicking now, he didn’t mean to insinuate the intent of leaving.

You shook your head, straightening your posture as you gathered your thoughts. “I can call a ride, it’s no worries. Got tons of stuff to do anyway.”

“I’m sorry.” Is all Bucky said. He wasn’t really sure why he’s apologizing or what it is for.

—

The door clicked closed and Bucky bolts to his workspace, closing down the applications that will implicate him.

He closes all applications but one, a tracking dot. He installed one on your work phone just in case you needed his help and can’t reach out. You’d never know who’s a sick fuck in these days.

Bucky shoots you a text but instead, he got a phone call.

Hey.

The sound of the road was muffled on your end, but nonetheless, the car was moving in the right direction.

I’m so sorry for earlier. I didn’t mean to...intrude. I just—I really like you, Bucky. I’m sorry I was too forward.

I… Bucky tries to play with time as he chooses his next words carefully, I like you too but I think we’re going too fast.

Your end was quiet, save from the ambient noises.

I guess so. Let’s keep things professional and friendly first, okay?

Okay.

I gotta go, I’m at my place.

The line went dead without as much as a goodbye.

Liar. Why would you lie to him? You have at least fifteen minutes more to go.

Why would you lie to him? Didn't you just say that you liked him? The way you said it was so casual—like it didn’t bother you that you were lying to him. Raised like a liar, die like a thief.

#bitchassbucky writes #dark!bucky x reader #dark!bucky x reader smut #dark!bucky x reader angst #dark!bucky x reader fluff #dark!bucky #dark!bucky barnes #dark!bucky barnes x reader #dark!bucky barnes x reader smut #dark!bucky barnes x reader fluff #dark!bucky barnes x reader angst

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niskoo · 3 years

Text

Memories kept in the pink hoodie

pairing: Ex! Heeseung x reader

genre: angst, fluff in the end ig, breakup! AU

warnings: swearing, uhhh they like break down together

word count: 2.2k words OMG

a/n: another one of my requests!! thank you all for the ideas its really helping!! mmm this one was very interesting to write because i usually write crack/fluff, aaannndd ive literally never done anything ive written IURHWIU thank you for the great idea anon <33 THIS HELPED SO MUCH OMG USUALLY MY ANGST SUCKS BUT IM PRETTY PROUD OF THIS AAAA ALSO IM SORRY IF THIS WASNT REALLY WHAT YOU WANTED IDK THERE ALWAYS HAS TO BE FLUFF IN MY IMAGINES IG 😓😭

feel free to request and help get rid of my writers block!!

a bit based off of 'try again' by jaehyun and d.ear

You should've known the consequences of dating an idol, you should've been careful. Of course they wouldn't let you be together, he's in one of the rising groups, heck, he was in one of the biggest companies.

It wasn't necessarily the company's fault you were so heartbroken, it's both your faults. You couldn't help but blame each other for how careless you were. You know better than to make things worse, and yet you did.

The evening you go back to his dorm after being confronted by the company, you two started a huge argument of who's fault it was. Either it was his fault for not taking caution during work, or your fault for always checking up on him. All loving actions in the past became reasons for why you should break up, thus cracking your relationship further.

When you went home that night, with your backpack full of your things, you did nothing. You didn't cry, you didn't rage, you simply thought that this was the end, you felt guilty that it had to end like this, instead of just working it out and breaking it off peacefully.

Your heart was left cracked and hurt for sure, but this time, you blame yourself. You shouldn't have met him, you shouldn't have got to know him, it's all your fault. And for the first time that night, you cry.

Your heart clenched at every thought of having to leave Heeseung, more tears falling at the fact that he's not gonna be a part of your life anymore. He's gone, and it's all your fault.

It's when you unpack your things when you realize you still have a bunch of things left at his place, you realize you never want to go back and face him.

You leave your stuff there for the next 2 days, your heart still unready to confront and be reminded of the fact that Heeseung is gone. Unfortunately, he has other plans.

Your phone lights up, and the last name you want to see is lighting the phone up.

'Hey... you left some of your stuff.'

You instantly turn your phone off, breaths picking up as you quickly look away from it and finish your lunch. You can feel the anxiety filling your body as you notice it light up once again, and it swarms in your chest even more when your mother winces at the next text.

You put down your spoon, quickly glancing at the text.

'If you want, you can come by and pick them up? I'll pack them for you...'

Your heart clenches yet once again, you know it's true, literally half your stuff is still there and you have to pick them up. You unlock your phone, quickly sending an 'okay' before completely shutting your phone down. You wouldn't stand a second more looking at his contact.

You decide to go at 11, because that's when the other members are at the company training. You don't know if Heeseung's gonna be there to give you your things, a part of you hopes he is, another hopes he's not there. But then again, who else would open the door for you?

You stand outside the familiar door nervously, picking on your nails and the lint on the hem of your cardigan. Just as you were about to knock, the door swung open, and instead of your ex boyfriend standing there it's the youngest of the group, his eyes wide and puffy lips parted.

As usual, he woke up late. You can't help but chuckle as he picks his shoes up and scurries down the stairs, bidding him a friendly goodbye.

You almost forget about Heeseung, but as you hear shuffling from inside, it all comes back.

You two share awkward glances, the tension slowly building itself back up. Instead of the heated, rage filled tension, this time the tension is guilty, and without each other knowing, yearning.

“T-this way,” Heeseung mutters tightly, eyes glued to the ground as he shuffled quickly to the living room. You follow along just a few seconds later, still processing the fact that this is the end. He could be gone out of your life after this, it’s your last chance to speak.

Your eyes slowly travel up when you stop, the beating of your heart quickening with the slight burning in your eyes. Lo and behold, there your things laid, ready for you to bring back home. You can’t help but notice how it’s packed completely how Heeseung would pack, neat and with care. It’s not too stuffed, it’s in the perfect place.

Biting at the dead skin of your lip, you trudge towards the duffle bag—his duffle bag—and kneel down to grab the handle. The moment you pick it up, you notice how the bag isn’t fully zipped, and a certain pink sleeve peaks out from the tiny space.

All too familiar, the pink sleeve was. It was the one he took from Daniel in I-land. He knew you loved it, for you loved the kid like your little brother. But, he can’t. It’s his, it’s his favorite, he can’t just give it to his ex.

You instantly place the bag down, the tears starting to well up in frustration and sadness. You zip open the bag and take the pink hoodie out, before shoving it into Heeseung’s chest, “Take it, Heeseung, Please don’t give it to me.”

It takes him a few moments, before Heeseung is shaking his head and handing it back to you. “No, it’s practically yours anyway. And you really like it right? It’s just a-“

“Don’t tell me it’s just a hoodie!”

You both are shocked at your sudden burst, frozen in your spot. Your breathing is heavy, like a weight is holding it down and slowing your breathing. There are tears keeping your cheek moist, warm, they stream down continuously, the sensation as if there was fire dripping from your eyes and burning your skin.

Heeseung’s just on the verge of crying himself, the grip on the pink hoodie deathly, he feels the material ripping against his skin. How did it come to this? When did it even happen? It all feels surreal, to think what you two had could fall apart.

All the happy moments in your relationship fading to memories, the hoodie representing the fact itself is true. None of you wanted to take it, afraid it would remind you of the other.

Deep down, you wanted to keep it, keep the memories it held, keep the tears that once soaked it when you vented all your stress to him, keep the scent of Heeseung that lingered on the fabric. You were just too afraid of being reminded that along with the happy memories, came the sad memories of the night you fought and broke it off.

Your grip on the poor hoodie eases, as you slide to the floor helplessly with tears messing your face up. You desperately wanted to hold the pink piece of clothing and keep it forever, and another part of you cursed at you for being too vulnerable.

Your hand quickly wipes away the tears on your cheeks and chin harshly, almost hitting yourself for being so sensitive. Before you could do the action again, a softer grasp is stopping your hand, Heeseung’s other hand reaching up to brush the tears away dearly, blowing your hair away from your face.

Before you could even bring yourself to stop, you’re already reacting to his touch, cowering into his hold and placing your hand over his on your cheek, almost intertwining them together.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper into his palm, your other hand reaching up to grasp at his t-shirt. You’re sorry for so many reasons, for not being careful, for all the things you said in the argument, for making a sudden commotion just because of a stupid hoodie. “I’m so sorry...”

“Shh, it’s alright, it’s alright.” Heeseung grabs you into his infamous embrace you would hate to leave, stroking your back with patterns just the way he knew you loved, just the way it would calm you down. “We’ll be alright.”

More tears fall between your eyelashes, dripping and soaking into Heeseung’s shoulder as he himself sniffles quietly into your hair. None of you want to leave each other behind, it’s the painful truth that you both can’t have, the truth you’ve always feared.

A sudden feeling of relief fills you up inside, his words reassure you in a way, we’ll be alright, you’ll be okay, it just had to leave his lips for you to believe it. You crawl closer to Heeseung, squeezing yourself in his bear hug, “We’ll be okay, we can make it right,”

A hoarse and hearty laugh leaves Heeseung, it shakes right by your ear as you press it against his chest, and he nods, “Yeah,”

He gently pulls your head back right in front of his, wiping the last of your tears and tucking the stray hairs back to the back of your ear, “Let’s just talk,” his whisper tickles your nose, causing you to lightly giggle at the feeling, his lips pressing softly against the pink tinted skin, “Make everything better?”

You nod, finally grasping at the pink hoodie and holding it tight to your chest as Heeseung laughs and bonks his forehead right on yours.

For the next few hours, you talk, make up, talk some more, maybe even a small cuddle, but that’s a secret. You make ramen for when the other members come back from practice, you feel happy to see the members thank you and eat with enthusiasm, you feel glad this is how your last moments together last.

Now you have the (practically ripped) pink hoodie in your arms as you bid the boys goodbye, slightly tearing up at the sight of them sadly waving, but you keep it in and continue your way back home, where you would tell your mom how you ended it on good terms.

And that night, you slip on the pink hoodie before you sleep, and you feel a piece of paper poking at your arm. You’re surprised to see a crumpled envelope poking out, your name written messily in blue ink.

You pull the envelope out quickly, opening it out with something bubbling in the pit of your stomach as you notice the handwriting as Heeseung’s.

‘My dear Y/n,

Hello there! I don’t know if i got the guts to make it right with you or if i pussied out and watched you as you drove away with regrets, but that’s what this letter is for. hopefully you didn’t throw this letter away hehe

i just wanted to thank you. for everything. your love, your care, your trust, Your happiness, thank you for everything you’ve given me. im sorry we had to end our journey, but know that you’ll be in my mind everyday. when we practice, I’ll remember your encouraging smile, when we win, I'll remember the fact that it’s you who gave me the courage to start this whole career.

i love you y/n. we’ll both probably find our other person in the future, but you’ll forever be in my heart as my first love, my first heartbreak, my best memory. thank you for helping me through my hardest times, thank you for helping the other boys through their worst times, especially jungwon, he’ll miss you the most.

i guess this is goodbye, y/n. not forever, of course, but for some time. thank you for everything, i hope you enjoyed the times we had together as much as i did.

with all the love in my heart,

Lee Heeseung :)’

You wipe at your tears for the nth time that day, folding the paper back into the envelope. “Fuck you Heeseung, you’ve ruined my makeup again!” You curse under your breath as you slip the letter into a certain box at the corner of your bedside table, patting your cheeks one last time.

You truly cherish the memories you had with Heeseung. You hope he does too.

#ehypen #enhypen imagines #enhypen angst #enhypen fluff #enhypen blurbs #enhypen drabbles #enhypen x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen heeseung #lee heeseung #lee heeseung angst #lee heeseung fluff #lee heeseung blurbs #lee heeseung x reader #lee heeseung scenarios

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aerequets · 3 years

Text

little pate a choux announcement

hey yall! so as u know my first big project, Pate A Choux, which ive been drawing since late december is almost over in a few parts. over the course of these few months, everyone has been so supportive and kind and i’ve gained so many sweet followers reading my comics!

in fact, I HIT 4K HERE YESTERDAY! WHOOOOO!

so in light of that, and the fact that pate a choux is ending soon, i wanted to do something ~special~. sadly i can’t take drawing requests because i already have a bunch in my inbox that i have yet to get to (cough, whoops). instead, i’m planning on doing some pate a choux bonus scenes once the story is over. i already have a few written down, but

leave a comment below on a bonus scene you want me to draw! i’ll pick some of my favorites and add them in the mix (and tag the person whose idea it was). i’m planning to do this on insta as well (since i hit 8k there WHICH I AM STILL REELING OVER) so i’ll likely split my time between both platforms, so make sure you think up your darndest best idea!

again, thank you guys for all your support. i have seriously never committed to such a long project before and have always bailed LMAOOO so this is a big accomplishment for me and i wouldn’t have made it without your constant comments and screaming in the tags :) until then!

#pate a choux #ratatouille au #miraculous #miraculous ladybug #ml #mlb #ml art #ml comic

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dwellordream · 3 years

Text

“…Now, if people are taught anything at all about medieval history it often is English medieval history. People with absolutely no other frame of reference can often tell you when the Norman Conquest of England took place, or the date of the signing of Magna Carta even if they don’t know exactly why these things are important. (TBH Magna Carta isn’t important unless you were a very rich dude at the time, sooooo.) If you ask people to name a medieval book they’ll probably say Beowulf even if they’ve never read it.

Here’s the thing though – England was a total backwater in terms of the way medieval people thought and was not particularly important at the time. How much of a backwater? Well, when Anne of Bohemia, daughter of my man Holy Roman Emperor Charles IV (RIP, mate. Mourn ya til I join ya.) married King Richard II of England in the fourteenth century there was uproar in Prague. How could a Bohemian imperial princess be sent to London? How would she survive in the hinterlands? The answer was she was sent along with an entire cadre of Bohemian ladies in waiting to give her people with whom she could have a sophisticated conversation.

This ended up completely changing fashion in England. Anne is the girl who introduced those sweet horned headdresses you think of when you think of medieval ladies, riding side-saddle, and the word “coach” to England, (from the Hungairan Kocs, where the cart she arrived at court the first time came from). Sweetening her transition to English life was the fact that she didn’t have to pay a dowry to get married. Instead, the English were allowed to trade freely with Bohemia and the Holy Roman Empire and allowed to be around a Czech lady. That was reward enough as far as the Empire was concerned. That’s how much England was not a thing. (The English took this insult very badly, and hated Anne at first, but since she was a G they got over it. Don’t worry.)

If England was unimportant why do we know about English medieval history and nothing else? Same reason you’re reading this blog in English right now, homes. I’m not sure if you know this, but in the modern period, the English got super super good at going around the world an enslaving anyone they met. When you’re busy not thinking about German imperial atrocities in the nineteenth century it’s because you’re busy thinking about British imperial atrocities, you feel me? So we all speak English now and if we harken back to historical things it gives us a grandiose idea of English history.

Say, then, you are trying to establish a curriculum for schools that bigs up English history, as is our want. Ask yourself – are you gonna want to dwell on an era where England was so unimportant that Czechs were flexing on it? Answer: no. You gonna gloss right over that and skip to the early modern era and the Tudors who I am absolutely sure you know all the fuck about. The second colonial-imperialist reason for not learning about medieval history is that medieval history doesn’t exactly aggrandise the colonial-imperialist system.

Yes, there are empires in medieval Europe. In addition to the Holy Roman Empire there’s the Eastern Roman Empire, aka the Byzantine Empire, whose downfall is often pointed to as one of several possible bookends to the medieval period. You also have opportunists like the Venetians who set up colonies around the Adriatic and Mediterranean, or the Normans who defo jump in boats and take over, well, anything they could get their hands on.

Notably, when these dudes got where they were going, they didn’t end up enslaving a bunch of people, committing genocide, and then funnelling all resources back to a theoretical homeland. The Normans settled down where they were eventually creating distinctive court cultures, and the Venetian colonies enjoyed a seriously high level of trade and quality of life without major disruption to local customs. Force was certainly used to take over at the outset, but it wasn’t something that resulted in the complete subjugation and deaths of millions halfway around the world from where the aggressors started.

No, the European middle ages are a lot more about local areas muddling along with smaller systems of rule. That’s why you have distinctive areas like say, Burgundy or Sicily calling their own shots and developing their own styles and fashions. Hell, even within imperial systems like the Holy Roman Empire Bavarians or Bohemians saw themselves as very much distinct peoples within an imperial system, not necessarily imperial subjects first and foremost.

You know where you would go to find some history that justifies huge imperial systems that require constant conquest and an army of slaves to keep them afloat? Ancient Rome. Remember how you got taught how great Rome was? How it was a democracy? How they had wonderful technology and underfloor heating, and oh isn’t that temple beautiful? Yeah, that’s because you were being inculcated to think that the ends of imperial violence justifies mass enslavement and disenfranchisement.

In reality, Rome wasn’t some sort of grand free democracy. Only a tiny percentage of Romans could actually vote. Women of any station certainly could not, and even men who were lucky enough to be free weren’t necessarily Roman citizens. Freedom here is particularly important because by the 1 century BCE 35 – 40% of the population of the Italian peninsula were slaves. Woo yeah democracy. I love it. And that’s not even taking into account all those times when an Emperor would suspend voting altogether.

Those slaves were busy building all the grand buildings your high school history teacher was dry jacking it about, stuffing the dormice that the rich people were reclining to eat, and basically keeping the joint running. Those slaves also necessitated the ridiculously huge army that Rome kept going because you had to get slaves from somewhere after all, so warfare had to be continuous. How uplifting.

Eagle-eyed readers will notice that this Roman nonsense is pretty much exactly what was going on during the modern colonial imperial age. You can say whatever the fuck you want about how free and revolutionary America was, for example. That doesn’t change the fact that only a handful of white property owning men could vote, and that the entire project required the mass enslavement of Africans and the genocide of Native Americans. That’s why you’ve been taught Rome is great. It helps you sleep well at night on stolen land because, really, haven’t all great societies done this? I mean without a forever war against anyone you can find, how will you keep a society going?

Our imperialist ideas about history lead to some weird historical takes. People love to tell you that no one bathed in the medieval period when medieval people had pretty much exactly the same sort of bathing culture as Romans. People laugh at medieval people believing in medical humoral theory despite the fact that Romans believed exactly the same thing and get a total pass on that front. The Roman ban on dissection is often taught as a medieval ban, shifting Roman superstition onto the shoulders of medieval people.

On-going Roman warfare is reported in glowing terms with emphasis on the “brilliance” of Roman military technique, while inter-kingdom warfare in the medieval period is portrayed as barbaric and ignorant. The Roman people who were encouraged to worship emperors as literal gods are used as an example of theoretical religion-free logical thinking, while medieval Christians are cast as ignorant for believing in God even when they are studiously working on the same philosophical queries as their predecessors. None of this makes any fucking sense.

But here’s the thing – it doesn’t need to. In a colonial imperialist society we have positioned Rome as a guiding light no matter what it’s actual practices and that’s not a mistake. It’s a design that helps to justify our own society. Further, this mindset requires us to castigate the medieval period when rule was more localised and systems of slavery had taken a precipitous dive. If only there had been more slavery, you know? Things might have been so much better.

Historical narratives and who controls them are always in flux. That old adage “history is written by the winners” comes to mind here, but that’s not exactly true. What the winners do is decide which histories are promoted, taught, and broadcasted. You can write all the history you want and if no one reads it, then it doesn’t really matter. That’s the gap that medieval history has fallen into. Colonial imperialism hasn’t figured out how to weaponise it yet, so it’s ignored. You could write this off as a “so what”, of course. Sure, maybe teaching the Roman Empire as a goal is a negative, but is ignoring medieval history really that bad a thing? You will be unsurprised to learn that I definitely think it is a bad thing, yes.

Ignorance about the medieval period is one of the things that is allowing the current swelling ranks of fascists to claim medieval Europe as some sort of “pure” white ideal. Spoiler: it was not. However, if you don’t know anything about medieval society how are you gonna argue with some chinless douche with a fake viking rune tattoo?History is always political. We use it to understand our world, but more than that we also use it to justify our world. Ignoring it helps us prop up our worst impulses, so let’s not.”

- Eleanor Janega, “On colonialism, imperialism, and ignoring medieval history.”

#colonialism #imperialism #history #medieval #eleanor janega

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