grossrottie

[grossrottie]

Since the OP made their post unrebloggable (and blocked me. Both actions they are well in with their right to do)

I'm going to make my response it's own post because I think the point is important

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As someone who is autistic and has BPD and CPTSD and loads of trauma yes you sometimes need to change how you interact with others to keep people around

When I was 13 I hit the few friends I had when I was angry

I had to change that in order to keep those friendships

When I was in my early 20s if I was losing an disagreement with my husband I would threaten to kill myself. My husband told me it hurt him and was cruel and manipulative behaviour, because it was.

So I worked hard to change that to keep my relationship

It's easy to say "I shouldn't have to change for others" and that's true to an extent. You shouldn't change your interests or passions or dim your light. And you should have space to be imperfect and flawed and not have to pretend your ugly bits aren't real. But if something you are doing it causing other people harm you kinda need to change that.

That's called "living in a society"

People adapt to each other and make space for each other in their lives. You adapt to them and they adapt to you

You start being more diligent about throwing away the empty toilet roll because it really bothers them. They start warning you before they run the blender because you hate loud noises

I stopped threatening to kill myself because I was mad I was losing an argument and my husband stopped being so vocally judgemental amount media he personally dislikes

There is a certain type of person who heard the phrase "your emotions are valid" and took that to mean "my emotional reactions and my behaviour are always objectively correct because my emotions are valid and if you have an emotional response or react to what I'm doing negatively then you are wrong and you can't be hurt because my emotions are valid"

And that's a recipe for disaster

Your emotions are valid to feel. They are how you feel and there are reasons you feel the way you do

However, your reactions and behaviour are something you can learn to control and can be irrational

We live in a society and we as people change each other as we interact and that isn't necessarily a bad thing

[grossrottie]

im not thrilled on the whole ‘having a vagina’ concept but i must accept that this is a gift god gives to the boys he knows will have the most constant and embarassing boners. at least im given some peace in this life

#thank god I don’t get a visible boner when I see a clown #my erections would be eMBARASSING #ask to tag #nsft warning

[grossrottie]

the comfort in a freak4freak friendship is knowing that you won't be judged for being a freak

#you know who you are

[grossrottie]

shoutout to fat selfshippers. shoutout to selfshippers with personality disorders. shoutout to selfshippers who aren't short. shoutout to black selfshippers. shoutout to disabled selfshippers. shoutout to selfshippers that frequently do not feel included in things like imagines or x reader fanfiction for whatever reasons there may be for that. I love you, and your f/os ESPECIALLY love you

#yells screams #ty op #I’m taller than all of my F/Os and this makes me feel a lot better abt it aAAA #selfship tag

[grossrottie]

*Blows Positivity Kazoo* Enjoy your fictional creations and be kind to others doing the same!

[grossrottie]

[grossrottie]

what is your holy trinity of fruits

#strawberries raspberries and honeycrisp apples

[grossrottie]

Literally nothing could be more fun for me than reading my own writing from months ago and forgetting i was the one who wrote it. Im glued to the screen and i cant wait to find out what happens next. Bitch YOU made it up!!!!

[grossrottie]

Selfshipping has no rules! That means you can...

🍄 Have any type of relationship or dynamic with your F/Os! Having your F/Os be related to your S/Is, be sweet, abusive, obsessed, victimized, anything you wish is valid and wonderful to experience!

🧡 F/O any character(s) you'd like! Main characters, side characters, background characters, characters from advertisements, memes, plushies, any fictional being that compels your heart!

🍄 Write, draw and create anything you'd like! It doesn't matter if the source material doesn't match your creations, all that's important is that you're contributing to your fandoms and having fun!!

🧡 Change your F/O's characteristics however you'd like! Project your own characteristics onto them, change their age, play around with their labels and identity, put them in any situations your mind can come up with! Your entertainment and enjoyment are your F/O's main priority!

🍄 Acknowledge or ignore canon as you please! Bring your F/O back from the dead, make it so they never met certain characters, insert yourself into their main storyline! Craft your story and love to fit all of your favorite tropes!!

🧡 Selfship for your own enjoyment! You don't need to understand or know everything about your F/O's source or even interact with it at all! You don't need to own merch or spend money on your F/O for your relationship to be valid, they love you no matter what!!

🍄 You can do anything you'd like when it comes to fiction! If it makes you happy and no real people are getting harmed because of it, do whatever you want!!

[grossrottie]

are there any selfship/ficto blogs that are proship friendly? i want to get into the community to see what it's like and all the posts i see in the selfship tag have 'proship dni' plastered all over them :( thanks in advance!

#omg hiii

[grossrottie]

I've said this before and I'll say it again: it's more important to know and understand fully why something is harmful than it is to drop everything deemed problematic. It's performative and does nothing. People wonder why nobody has critical thinking skills and this is part of it because no one knows how to simousltansly critique and consume media. You need to use discernment.

[grossrottie]

It makes me happy when they listen

[grossrottie]

Hot fandom discourse take but framing dark content as only being acceptable if its a vehicle for exploring personal trauma is just giving ground to the puritan segments of fandom.

Simply liking dark content for its own sake is perfectly fine.

[grossrottie]

posting self ship content literally on a self ship blog: hmm. embarrassing. nobody look at that please

#selfship tag

[grossrottie]

the ghost of one specific homosexual cowboy regularly possesses Tumblr gays

[grossrottie]

Selfshippers who ship with weird/unappealing characters. I love you. Like hell yeah you go get with Mr Crocker. Go get with lord faarquad

#ASFHJJI #THANKS #selfship tag #count tag 🕰

[grossrottie]

guy tries to toss a cigarette on the ground but the ground parries it and it flies back into his mouth and he solemnly continues to smoke it