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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 6 months

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you drink your coffee black and we are afraid of each other ; shoko ieiri

synopsis; shoko makes you a morning cup of coffee; turns out she’s not very good at that, but it’s the thought that counts.

word count; 4.2k

contents; shoko ieiri/reader, gn!reader (but written w a fem!reader in mind), fluff fluff fluff!!, just normal morning shenanigans at the ieiri household, implied stsg (my brand), shoko can be a girlfailure. as a treat, reader is absolutely whipped (and so am i)

a/n; been writing too much gojo n geto lately. neglecting my wife :((((((( let it be known that i am a shoko stan first human second. this one is for my wlws pls eat up!!!!

you wake up to the sound of your girlfriend’s voice.

melodic and soft, low and saccharine; almost like she’s coaxing you out of hiding. a sound so lovely you wish you could drown in it, laced together with a distinctly raspy tilt, one you can only attribute to the copious amounts of cigarettes she smoked back in high school. a leftover residue, bittersweet memories ghosting her lips — one that gets you a little bit weak in the knees.

in the mornings, it’s particularly prominent, a little intoxicating. manifesting itself as a shiver down your spine, a jolt of your heartbeat, a flush on your skin for every word that she speaks. it’s enough to have you slipping from sleep’s embrace, carried back into the cradle of reality.

why you notice her voice first, and not the smell of something burning — or the sound of insistent beeping — is honestly beyond you.

it doesn’t take long for your sleepy brain to react, however, a pang of anxiety rushing through your slumbering veins. hurriedly stirring you awake. abrupting your dreamlike, drowsy state, tangled up in silken sheets with your neck smudged by lipstick marks; an alluring red, one shoko typically favors when she’s going out for a drink. coming home just a tiny bit tipsy, affectionate and giggly.

and when your eyelids finally flutter open, your mind melting into the motion of the waking world, you shoot up in a sudden bout of panic.

because fuck, you belatedly, groggily realize — that’s the fucking fire alarm.

and shoko is spewing curses, from afar, loud enough that you can hear it even through the fog of fatigue that clouds your brain. a raspy string of words that you don’t quite catch, but they’re enough to have you scrambling out of bed, nearly bumping into the doorframe as you kick the blanket off your legs.

”what happened?” you croak out, chest heaving a little, having stumbled into the smoke-filled kitchen. disgruntled, reeling with the aftermath of your deep slumber, cold air nipping at your bare skin. the balcony door is open, and the smell of rain invades your apartment.

when you look out the window, all you see is a gray sky, blanketed by a thick coating of wool. smothered by clouds, not a single ray of sunlight slipping through the cracks. the world smells dewy and sweet, asphalt and flowers melting into a nostalgic fragrance, one that reminds you a bit of high school smoke breaks — huddling under the slide at the nearest playground, watching a pretty girl wrap her lips around a cigarette, exhaling smoke just for it to melt into the pouring rain.

one that reminds you a bit of the woman right in front of you, balancing on a chair and stretching her goosebump-ridden arms towards the ceiling, wearing nothing but a lacey bra and a pair of unbuttoned jeans. messy hair that cascades down her back, brows furrowed, eyes simmering with irritation — before flitting over to meet your own.

shoko blinks. then sighs. ”you woke up?” she mutters, and you try not to shiver when the tremor of her voice deepens, morning-fatigue seeping into the syllables. “fuck. sorry, i —”

she stumbles a little, shifting her weight from one foot to another, and you take a step forward. on instinct, as if getting ready to cushion her fall. ready to be of service, in any way you can.

”don’t worry,” she fumbles with the fire alarm, clicking her tongue. nails scraping against plastic. “it’s fine, i just need to — there we go.”

finally, the beeping stops. and your shoulders relax, immediately, the tight little ball inside your chest untangling. with a deep inhale, the fragrance of espresso and smoke fills your nostrils, and a sense of calm washes over you. rooting your feet to the floor.

shoko settles down, too, seating herself on the wooden chair. a huff slipping from her lips. they’re smudged, a blurry red she still hasn’t found the energy to wipe away.

bringing a hand up to card through her hair, lithe fingers in between her messy auburn locks, she exhales. a blend between fatigue and relief.

”god. i need a cig.”

a moment passes. she raises her head, and sees the sleepy little pout playing at your lips — her eyes softening. blooming with something fond. giving you a smile, tired, small. but reassuring.

”i’m just kidding, love,” she chuckles. “relax.”

”don’t joke about that,” you frown, rubbing the sleep from your weary eyes. stifling a tiny yawn. ”.. took me so long to get you to quit.”

(sometimes you can still see the smoke leave her lungs when she exhales.)

shoko keeps smiling, but doesn’t say anything else. the pitter patter of rain against your balcony railing fills the silence of the kitchen, still brimming with a light layer of smoke, slowly dwindling. cold air drawing it out. clad only in one of suguru’s old t-shirts, you shiver, and shoko seems to notice.

“good morning,” she coaxes, opening her arms slightly — and you move forward, a moth to a flame. without thinking. “sorry for waking you.”

she wraps her arms around your waist, attaching her jaw to the curve of your shoulder, and you melt into the embrace. leaning close, to tuck yourself into her neck. she smells like lavender shampoo. “‘s fine,” you mumble, a yawn muffled into her collarbone. “what happened? are you okay?”

when her plump lips press against the sensitive skin of your neck, right next to one of the kiss marks she left there last night, you can’t help but shiver again. she must feel it, because you can hear the smile she’s trying to bite back in her voice when she answers.

“mm,” she hums, a gravelly noise that makes your throat clog up a little. “just burned something, it’s fine. don’t worry.”

tentatively, you take a step back. just to see her. gazing down at her, into her hazel eyes, the fading crescents beneath them. not as dark as they used to be, not as heavy with lost sleep.

shoko is gorgeous. always, every single day, but you think she’s particularly breathtaking like this. when it’s early, and she’s groggy and a little disheveled, eyes weary and lipstick smudged — bra strap close to slipping off her shoulder, black lace against pale skin, moles littering her forearms and chest like star clusters. oversized jeans that expose the curve of her waist, the fat of her hips, and you don’t notice how intently you’re staring until shoko’s raspy voice reaches your burning ears.

“eyes up here, baby.”

you do as you’re told, and she stifles a chuckle. eyes rich with amusement. you try not to blush.

“sorry.” you chew at the inside of your cheek. eyes trailing to the houseplants by the windowsill. “.. you’re just so pretty.”

shoko tilts her head, an exasperated little breath rolling off her tongue. almost a coo. she’s incapable of blushing; but if she wasn’t, you’re sure she'd blush.

“thanks.” her touch is light, fingertips trailing down the expanse of your arm. “you are, too. red is a good colour on you.”

you blink. shoko’s eyes are crinkled at the edges, soft lines of crows’ feet, and you huff when you realize she’s talking about the marks on your neck. suddenly a little self-conscious, you bring a hand up to rub at the skin — as if hoping to wipe them away. you doubt it works. shoko just breathes out an airy chuckle, getting up from her seat.

she looks tired, still. stretching her limbs out, sleepily, blinking drowsily.

and it’s odd, you think. that she got up this early, that she didn’t cling to you and make you stay with her in bed like she usually does. you don’t know anyone who loves sleeping in more than shoko does. especially after a night out.

so it’s strange. very strange.

“hey, sho.”

“hm?”

you tilt your head. “why are you up this early, anyway?”

she blinks, and then glances at the clock on the wall. ticking idly, counting down. when she looks back at you, she’s got a single eyebrow raised. “it’s not really early.”

“for you it is,” you quip, something resembling a grin tugging at your lips. and she rolls her eyes, smiling, before linking her arm with yours. bringing you to the stove.

“i was, uh —“ a pause. she does a little cough under her breath, clearing her throat. “trying to make coffee.”

silently, you look at the mess in front of you; what used to be your squeaky-clean stovetop, now stained with a muddy, rusty residue. an unassuming coffee pot sits to the side, having seemingly boiled over, smoke still drifting up into the air.

shoko cringes, a little, before a wry smile makes its way to her lips. ”it was…” she clicks her tongue. sighing softly. ”an attempt.”

”… wait.” you turn to look at her, dubiously, and she avoids your gaze. ”that’s what you burned? coffee?” still no answer. a tiny smile tugs at your lips, and you can’t help it if your voice comes out sounding a little teasing. ”how is that even possible?”

”look,” shoko exhales, heavy. ”i don’t know, okay? i think it was the coffee grounds, or something. i look away for one second, and it’s just —”

a little giggle slips from your lips, and shoko shoots you a glare. mostly harmless, but she untangles her arm from your own. ”sorry, it’s just —” you apologize, failing to hide your amusement. ”why didn’t you just use the espresso machine, honey?”

she bites her lip, and you think she might be just a little embarrassed. averting her gaze, briefly flitting towards the machine in question. ”… i didn’t know how to use it,” she mutters. ”i’ve seen you do it, obviously, but i never paid attention to the steps.”

a smile graces your lips. consoling. “it’s not that complicated once you know how it works,” you nudge her arm with your elbow. ”it just looks that way.”

she hums. a click of her tongue, as she adjusts her bra strap. ”well, anyway. i tried. so.”

”right.” you try to stifle a grin, to no avail. ”so… you burned your coffee.”

”and woke you up.” she grins, herself, just a tiny bit self-deprecating. but pretty, always, hair falling over her eyes when she tilts her head. ”a mess, aren’t i?”

”not at all.”

shoko looks at you, and your eyes meet hers. unflinchingly. tired irises falling into the gentle hue of your own, trickling down to the curve of your lips. there’s an honesty to your voice that she’s never quite been able to deal with.

(love, she thinks. a kind of love she finds somewhat hard to stomach. a sea of acceptance that she fears she’ll eventually drown in.)

before she can properly fall into a morning spiral, you stretch your neck a bit, idly, and she gets a good look at the red marks littering your skin. the way your pulse beats at the base of your throat. tender, slight, a mantra she’s grown just a little bit addicted to.

”why, though?” you hum, and shoko blinks. snapped out of her thoughts, and back into reality. back into you, the faux pout on your lips. playful, but a little confused. ”i thought i was the coffee brewer of this relationship…”

and it’s true. you’ve been making shoko’s morning cups of coffee for a while, now, even before you moved in together. she likes it black, sometimes with a drop of cream, sometimes with a cube of sugar. never both. you think it’s very like her, to tiptoe that line between bitter and sweet — never entirely giving in to one or the other. there’s a balance to shoko, something stable. something for you to hold on to, a bitter tinge or syrupy taste that always leaves you yearning for more.

truthfully, your coffee brewing skills aren’t anything special. but it makes shoko happy, to wake up and stumble into the kitchen, being able to hug your back. being handed a cup of fresh coffee. sipping from it in silence, muttering out a groggy good morning that makes your heart flutter.

(to you, it’s precious. that lilt of her voice, that bittersweet tinge. the dearest thing in the world.)

plump bottom lip trapped between her teeth, shoko furrows her brows. ever so slightly. nails tapping at the edge of the kitchen counter, a series of satisfying clicks against the marble. “… well.”

she clears her throat, but doesn’t say anything else. a moment passes. you try to find the answer in the curve of her lips, the crease of her brow, in the depths of her eyes — but you don’t succeed.

something discomforting settles in the bottom of your throat. almost uncertain, maybe a bit anxious. sheepish, as your tired mind spins in circles. parting your lips. hesitant.

“do you… not like the way i make it?” there’s a dejected tilt to your voice when it spills out, one that makes you feel a little silly. so you smile, or try to, eyes trailing towards the windows; you note that the rain has grown heavier. “i can change how —“

“what?” shoko cuts you off. “no. no, of course not — your coffee’s perfect. honestly.”

again, your eyes meet. and again, shoko seems to be struggling with finding the right words. or maybe she’s struggling to voice them.

“i just… haah.” she brings a hand up to her face, pinching the bridge of her nose. you just watch, silent, hungry to hear the thoughts she’s not letting you in on.

a beat. again, the sound of the rain against steel railings, the scent of honeydew and concrete. espresso-flavored smoke, almost entirely faded, leaving only cold air to nip at your thighs.

and again, as always, inevitably, your eyes are fixed on shoko — a moth to her flame. helpless to the cinders that ghost at your skin whenever she looks at you. a certain contemplation swims inside her eyes, simmering beneath the surface, as she chews gently at the plush of her lips. before turning to face you.

you can only blink. but shoko finally speaks, clearing her throat in a way that strikes you as rather sheepish.

“well — you’re always the one doing all the work. aren’t you?” her voice trickles out into the air, low and saccharine, a blanket pulled over your shoulders. so soft you hold your breath and strain your ears, just to make sure you hear it. “i guess i figured… i don’t know.”

shoko pauses, again, and you can almost delude yourself into thinking there’s a cherry red tint to the tips of her ears. when she parts her lips, that usually carefree voice of hers sounds almost meek. almost, but not quite. more like unsure. embarrassed?

another moment passes, entirely silent. shoko swallows her pride.

“.. satoru always brags about suguru making him those fucked up sugary drinks he likes,“ she mumbles. turning around, to rest her back against the counter, looking out at the downpour. “says it makes him feel so loved. or whatnot. so i just —“

she waves her hand, haphazardly.

“you know.“

a beat. then another. you can physically feel your lips part, a kind of surprise weaving itself into the contours of your face.

and when you finally speak, your voice comes out a little garbled, scrambling for the right words. not sure if you should feel deeply amused, or just a tiny bit horrified. “wait. you’re saying you…” a moment passes. silent, slow, and all you can do is blink owlishly. in disbelief.

“… got inspired by suguru?”

shoko groans, deep and gravelly, almost comically agonized. covering her face with her pretty hands. “don’t say it,” she pleads, “you’re making it sound as dumb as it is.”

a little giggle slips from your lips. accidental, but she still shoots you a displeased look, huffing under her breath. crossing her arms just to tap at her forearm with her nimble fingers. frowning.

“don’t laugh at me.”

“sorry,” you search for her gaze, but she keeps looking ahead. so stubborn. “i don’t mean to, ‘s just — not very like you, y’know?”

shoko exhales. nearly a huff, but not quite. and you think she must be embarrassed, gnawing at her lip like that, fingers eagerly searching for something to fidget with. it makes you soften, impeccably, the blood inside your veins warming up beneath your skin. stirring you, coaxing you into soothing her. your very own heartbeat seems to be a little enamored with shoko ieiri.

”i appreciate the thought,” you smile. a tender tone, sincere. lingering with amusement. “really. but let’s not base our entire relationship around satoru and suguru of all people, alright?”

and again, she sighs. brittle, a little fatigued. brows scrunching together. ”look, i —”

a pause. she gnaws at her plump bottom lip, eyelashes fluttering like a battered heartbeat. her voice comes out sounding soft, all duvet pillows and fresh lavender, a lilt that anchors you to earth. sweet words. so honest it makes your breath hitch.

”i want to take care of you.”

and this time, you’re the flustered one. burning under her gaze, feeling a heat blossom on your skin. feeling the fervent pitter patter of your heartbeat, as her pretty eyes look into yours. a nice mocha brown.

but even with the fresh embarrassment trickling through your veins, you find it in you to speak. desperate, maybe, to cross the distance between you — even when it borders on non-existent. desperate to feel your heartbeats synchronize, figuratively or literally. to stitch them together.

“i want to take care of you, too,” you echo, looking down at the floor. and then back at your girlfriend. hesitant, a tad shy. but sincere.

a sincerity so palpable it makes shoko feel a little jealous.

(sometimes, she finds herself wanting to put a hand inside your chest. dig around your organs, run her fingertips down every single one, until she finds what she's looking for. that miraculous something that makes you stick around, that makes you so frighteningly easy to love. that makes her want to safeguard you so terribly.)

”then let’s take care of each other,” she breathes, a small smile slipping into the curve of her lips. reaching out to brush against your knuckle, weave your fingers together. delicate.

she clears her throat. “… i guess.”

and you can’t help but smile. somewhat cheeky, a little teasing. “ah,” your eyes crinkle, and you stifle a coo. “did that embarrass you?”

a sharp little scoff. shoko gives you a lazy grin, paired with a soft roll of her eyes. brushing her thumb across your knuckles, even still. “oh, shut up.”

the world seems to still, ever so slightly, as you look into each other’s eyes. like everything else is just background noise, from the pitter patter of the rain to the fading smell of coffee all around you. shoko looks at you like she’s trying to see inside your brain, see what makes you tick, see you for what you are.

and when she eventually leans in for a kiss, you’re pliant. expectant. her lips against yours, breathing you in, as soft as ever. like she’s afraid of getting too greedy. she tastes like nectar and cosmetics.

“give me some time,” she says, after pulling back. hands on your waist, squeezing softly. “i’ll make you another cup right now.”

”sure you don’t want me to do it?” you ask. “i don’t mind.”

another little scoff. offended. ”look, i’m not incompetent, okay? i’m just not used to it.” she untangles herself from you, warmth slipping away. you will yourself not to chase it. “just stand there and look pretty for me.”

and she smiles, when those words make you giggle, infected by your sleepy joy. something soft and silky blooms inside her ribcage, mirrored by the glimmer in your eyes when you intertwine your hands again. fingertips brushing against each other, delicate, a love that’s handled with care.

”.. i like making you coffee,” you whisper after a beat. smiling. under your breath, like you’re telling her a secret. ”it makes me happy.”

a moment passes. something in shoko’s bones still, for a second, enough for you to notice. and her eyes fill with a kind of hesitance. doubt, maybe. or fear.

when shoko opens up to you, it’s always like this. sleepy, rainy days, or tipsy afternoons. in no more than a whisper, a fragile breath, the ghost of a confession. when you can feel her heartbeat, one finger on her wrist, listening to the rhythm of her pulse. intimate. a little clumsy, but…

”i just don’t want you to spend too much of yourself on me.”

the words are spoken in passing, almost casually, a lighthearted kind of resignation. a hungry ghost. one that follows her, follows you. suguru and satoru, too. there’s a lump in her throat, you can tell, something that makes it a little harder to say what she means. an intimacy that frightens her in a way nothing else can; frightened to hold it in her palms, to keep it close without having it break apart.

(not just her — you all are. all four of you. that’s why you've always been together, you think, why you always will be. four hedgehogs huddling together in the cold of night, too desperate for warmth to stay away from each other's spines.)

carefully, almost cautiously, you bring her hand to your lips. as if you’re handling a flimsy sheet of glass. featherlight, a touch so tender you hope she knows what you’re about to say before the words leave your throat.

“you’re worth it,” is whispered against her skin, your lips against her knuckles. shoko softens, but you think the sigh that slips from her lips sounds just a little shaky. “always.”

and finally, you know you aren't deluding yourself. it’s there, visible, the cherry red of her ears; a red that matches the lipstick on your skin. a flush that never travels down to her face. but it’s enough.

she clears her throat. voice beginning to change shape, slowly but surely, morning fatigue peeled off with the ticking of the clock. there’s still a raspy residue, leftover smoke that’ll never quite leave her lungs, but it’s silkier now. trickling like honey from her parted lips.

and it’s terribly soft, her tongue twisting around the vowels, a low lilt that drips with tenderness. she wills herself to smile. tired, but fond. “just let me make you one cup, then.”

so you do.

you let her, after briefly pointing out the functions of the far too expensive espresso machine that satoru bought you when you first moved in, and she listens intently. those pretty eyes, the intelligence behind them, her lips pursed in focus. shoko’s a genius, you’ve always thought — so effortlessly good at memorization, at figuring out how things work. what ties everything together.

you think it’s a little comical that she struggled so much with making coffee, of all things, but you choose to attribute it to her slight hangover.

because she’s focused, when she begins to fiddle with the machine. attentive. as if she’s dissecting it. a satisfaction in the way she moves, the way everything clicks into place as she works. everything serves a purpose, every single part in the machinery, every tube or pump of caffeine. she compares it to the human body, a glint in her eyes, and you can’t disagree.

all you can do is watch her. silently, entirely mesmerized. sitting on the kitchen counter, bare thighs against the marble, swinging your legs. telling her about the dream you had, while she listens. always.

a fresh, thick aroma of espresso and rainwater begins to waft through the apartment. one you drink in, greedy, steam filling your lungs. as you admire how the tiny droplets bounce off the hyacinths blooming on your balcony.

and when she’s finished, producing one cup of espresso, tailored to your liking, you can’t still the beating of your heart. unsure if you should blame it on the caffeine yet to enter your veins, or the proud smile that lingers on your girlfriend’s lips. maybe the way her fingers curl around the handle, the way a soft here, baby, spills from her smudged lips. all of the above, probably.

she’s gorgeous. breathtaking. sometimes you want to give her everything, more than you could live without. your heart, your lungs, your eyes. anything she asks for.

but she would never. all she’ll ever need is for you to keep sticking around, keep telling her about your silly dreams, keep letting her feel the beat of your pulse at the base of your throat. a mantra she’s fallen a little bit in love with.

and when you put your lips against the ceramic, and a bittersweet scent fills your lungs, you think you can taste it. that care, a love soft enough to mend all the jagged edges of your heart.

shoko smiles. smoothing a stray eyelash from your skin, thumb against your cheekbone. “how is it?”

(you swear it’s the best cup of coffee you’ve ever had.)

#i love!! my wife!!!!#shoko gap moe is real (and heres why)#i just think she’d be a lil softer around someone she likes . shes awkward w intimacy but she treasures u so dearly :<#dont get me wrong tho she definitely has smth Wrong w her and i love that side of her too!!#i feel like she would joke abt wanting to dissect u (but is it rly a joke 🤨🤨)#if this reader seems more whipped than usual then that is bc im projecting <33 oh to live in a cramped apartment w shoko ieiri …#to have her cover my neck and face in kiss marks…….. (dies) i literally need it SO bad u dont understand. there r tears in my eyes.#title from a clementine von radics poem that i cant remember the name of … all her poems r so shoko coded tho #shoko ieiri #shoko ieiri x reader #shoko fluff #shoko x you #shoko ieiri x you #shoko ieiri x y/n #shoko x reader #jjk fluff #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader

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comradekatara · 3 months

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notes on “the runaway”

the more i see people discuss how strangely sokka’s character is portrayed in “the runaway” the more i cannot help but feel that all my ad hoc rationalizations and justifications as to why he would contradict himself so greatly might actually be meaningless. why would he allow the gaang to endanger themselves for foolish reasons when he is the overly paranoid voice of caution in literally every other episode? why would he be so easily swayed by toph’s manipulative promise of buying him a fancy atlas when he’s literally holding her wanted poster? and most crucially, why would he say that he sees katara as his mother when no other episode in the show indicates that this is remotely the case?

this episode is great for katara and toph, whose hangups are compellingly explored here. i won’t get into the common misconceptions about katara being “motherly” or why they’re even at loggerheads to begin with, as i’ve discussed this at length in the past, but it’s actually undeniable that the assumption that katara is the de facto “mom friend” stems primarily from this episode, where toph all but outright accuses her of fancying herself their collective mother. however, katara becoming “the mother” of the group is very much a post-toph shift in her character, and you see her femininity being accentuated in contrast with toph’s deliberate lack of femininity also being linked to this sort of maternal role that she occasionally adopts, especially around toph. but i don’t actually think the issue is one of katara being a smothering, maternal figure towards toph, but rather a miscommunication regarding power, gender, class, and community vs independence. when katara and toph fight, it is for far more complex and nuanced reasons than the notion that katara is simply too overbearing. if anything, it’s the way in which she is overbearing that irks toph, just as toph’s rudeness is not the central issue, but rather that toph’s values (those of total independence and freedom) are misinterpreted as malice by katara (who values community and collaboration), and vice versa.

something very crucial to understand about this episode is that katara is not actually mad that toph endangered their group by pulling fun scams. katara has endangered their group countless times in the past to satisfy her own impulsive desires (and yes, she wants justice, but toph similarly rationalizes her scams through the lens of achieving moral vindication). katara would be all over toph’s scammery, would come up with scams of her own, would be having more fun than anyone—had she been included from the start. which is exactly the point. it is her exclusion that foments her critique, not the subject of their act itself (and the reason that you could not replace katara with sokka in this scenario is simply because toph would never exclude sokka in the first place). but katara would never admit that she is hurt by toph’s exclusion aloud, because katara is an extremely proud person. and a prideful, wounded fourteen year old is not going to thoughtfully use “i statements” as if in a group therapy session with the equally prideful twelve year old who deliberately excluded her; no, she is going to lash out. (lest we forget that in their first real episode establishing their group dynamic, katara literally mocks toph’s blindness. hardly an okay thing to do, in my opinion!) their conflict stems from their differences, but also from their similarities. they are both proud, angry, powerful, stubborn, and must assert their dominance at all times. it’s clear they both want to be friends with each other, and at times they are, but it is really only in this episode where they are able to cross a threshold that allows them to be truly honest about more meaningful insecurities than simply their looks (although i do of course find their exchange in “tales” beautiful as well). and you know who is instrumental (albeit reluctant to interfere) in facilitating that growth? sokka.

i’ve gone more in depth in the past analyzing why sokka’s speech in this episode regarding his mother and katara isn’t exactly as it sounds. i personally interpret his admission, that katara has always been there for him and that her face is all he sees when he tries to picture his mother, as an illustration of his codependent attachment to her, as she is the very locus of his identity. this interpretation is compounded by the fact that when kya’s face is finally revealed later in the season, she does bear an uncanny resemblance to sokka, which to me signifies the way in which sokka sublimates his own face for katara’s—which is also deeply unhealthy, but in a different way than an older brother parentifying his younger sister would be.

the fact is that there is simply no indication throughout the entire show (including this episode) that sokka views or treats katara as a parent. there are of course moments wherein she supports him emotionally or materially, but most of the time she is in fact teasing, tormenting, undermining, yelling at, or otherwise making life harder for him, at which point he is far more likely to act as her guardian figure and admonish her while simultaneously helping her get out of whatever mess she’s caused. and considering that sokka’s defining moment is when hakoda stakes his identity to protecting his (ontologically special) sister (which, as we know, as the bearer of kya’s face, in fact means dying for her), this dynamic makes far more sense than the other way around. i know that people commonly portray katara as the voice of reason who cleans up sokka’s messes, but besides a couple examples, it’s consistently the other way around. yes, it’s very easy to assume that sokka’s speech indicates that he sees katara as his replacement mother, but we cannot take this speech at face value if we are also to take the rest of the text into account, which we must.

but then there’s also the other glaring question that must be taken into account: why would sokka even allow all this? considering the first thing toph bartered was the sword he has painstakingly crafted just an episode prior, why didn’t sokka just pull the plug then and there? it really doesn’t make sense that sokka wouldn’t take katara’s side just for practical, logistical reasons. even if she doesn’t really care about the own point she’s making (as demonstrated by the fact that the scam she devises literally lands her in jail), sokka would see the logic in it. but... he does. he is the one to first discover the wanted poster, and he immediately points out to toph that their scams are drawing undue attention to her, and that they should put an end to it now that's it's putting them at risk. and yet, toph successfully bribes him, and so he continues to participate. why? what about the prospect of having money is so appealing to sokka that he’s willing to risk his precious rationality and caution for the potential of acquiring more of it? well, it’s actually quite simple.

toph is scamming for the thrill of the game. she loves proving the kind of men who undermined and demeaned her all her life wrong. she loves humiliating the people of the world who had once humiliated her. she’s not someone who values earthly possessions or really even understands that money is a finite resource. to her, these scams are a matter of ego. aang is also scamming for the thrill of the game. he loves a prank, a bit of mischief, getting into some tomfoolery. he loves spending time pulling hijinks with his friends. it’s funny, it’s fun, and it’s lucrative on top of that. but it’s clear that he views it as a game. now, sokka similarly enjoys pulling these scams. he adores toph and clearly finds it nearly as satisfying as she does to watch her destroy the egos of men thrice her size. but even more potent than his adoration for toph, is his appreciation for money.

when katara put them all in danger countless times in the past, it may have been to enact righteous justice, but it was never materially beneficial to sokka. sokka is a very practical person, and growing up in a state of colonial abjection taking on the role of provider for a couple dozen people mostly comprised of elderly women and small children makes you appreciate the value of goods and resources in a way that an aristocrat and a monk do not. you may be asking, "are you really arguing that sokka would undermine his own values and endanger himself and his friends so readily for the prospect of financial security?" to which i would argue that you underestimate how truly cynical sokka is. of course he loves money and food he doesn’t have to catch or forage – see: his appreciation for the immediate luxury of ba sing se that everyone else finds so stifling. he is not spiritual; he is attached to earthly possessions and the immediate physical needs of those around him. so of course he loves a material object. in his own words: “i do believe in the power of stuff.” because even when sokka is supposedly being uncharacteristically foolish or naive, he is in fact nonetheless promoting the cynic’s agenda every step of the way.

“the runaway” is a good episode, perhaps even a great one. however, it has also lent to some of the fundamental misinterpretations i see of katara, sokka, and toph that are constantly thrown around (including the occasional citing of this episode to justify that aang apparently “sees katara as his mother”). so in some ways, i do resent this episode for begetting those strange and incorrect takes, even if i think that in a vacuum, it is well-executed. it is an episode that complicates our characters, adds nuances and shades of grey to their pre-established characterizations, but does not actually rewrite them. sure, if this was the only episode of the show i had ever seen, i too might assume that katara was the maternal and responsible figure of the group, toph was a careless and rude little bitch, and aang and sokka were idiots who relied solely on katara’s infinite well of long-suffering guidance. but even within this episode, that is clearly not established to be the case, and if that notion is not sufficiently undermined by the episode’s conclusion, it is quite clearly by the episodes bracketing it, which provide crucial context through which to inform our understandings of the choices made in this episode, and why they are indeed interesting, but nonetheless do not reflect the characterizations established in the series as a whole.

#id in alt text #analysis #katara #toph #sokka #aang #katara&toph #katara&sokka #this episode is sooo #well. i like it #but the things it has done to how this fandom reads the gaang dynamic #is just. goddawful #so here are my 2 cents on why it IS in fact in character #but simply. no one is reading is correctly #feel free to disagree tho you can just straight up think its a bad episode thats okay too #i love katara and toph fighting in the mud sm tho #how could you ever hate that. i ask of you. how

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