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justmenoworries · 2 months

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Smith is depicted as someone with powerful, intense desires, who repeatedly settles for less because he believes what he actually wants is impossible. Cartoon heroes aren't real, so he pilots the realistic military mech. When it turns out they are real, the super robot chooses someone else. He can't pilot Superbia, either. He clearly dwells on this stuff and gets his feelings hurt– he has nightmares about being rejected by Bravern, what a nerd– but it never festers or becomes toxic envy. He's unrelentingly positive and determined to make the best of things. "A relationship with Isami is obviously impossible, but I can be his friend, and I can protect him with the Brave Knights." Smith is also passionate and brave, but he's reckless with his own life. He "dies" during the training mission in the first episode because he disobeyed orders and rushed in on his own. He dies for real fighting Cunus, essentially sacrificing himself for everyone else. But he's brought back from death by his mutual love for Isami– a character who is essentially the inverse of Smith, in that he is not necessarily traditionally brave, but has a strong desire to live and protect the lives of others. They each have what the other needs to learn. Cunus' relationship to Smith is what Bravern's relationship to Isami superficially appears to be in the first two episodes, but with a more antagonistic lens: a powerful alien robot watches a human from afar and fixates on him. She knows his name, but from his perspective they've never met. He is terrified of her, but she doesn't take no for an answer. She chooses him because she can sense the intensity of his hidden desires, and once he becomes Bravern he makes it very clear what those desires are. This guy isn't just enthusiastic and friendly, he was so in love with Isami that the physical embodiment of desire was drawn to him over literally everyone else on Earth. I can only imagine that initial experience of becoming Bravern was euphoric, as the perfect realization of all his desires that he had given up on. It's his childhood dream. It's another chance to save the world. It's metaphysical proof that Isami loved him and wanted him to come back! Bravern can be openly gay with none of the fear or embarrassment that comes with attaching those desires to his human identity. But oh, wait. Isami is scared of Bravern. Isami doesn't know why Bravern chose him. Isami is going to fall in love with Smith, and then Bravern is going to have to let him die– and he also knows that Isami doesn't trust Bravern, because he said it to Smith's face before that final battle. It's a really interesting contradiction to navigate, and it's obviously part of why Bravern chills out and becomes much more reasonable over time. He cares about Isami's feelings, and he wants to form an actual relationship with him as Bravern, not just selfishly steamroll over him. ...But he's still not able to connect the two identities. I think it's very telling that the love confession happens while he's a robot, and that he only ever admits to his identity indirectly when he's literally about to die. Bravern is the representation of Smith's love for Isami in the most literal sense, and he's also the only thing that allows Smith to express that love openly. He's still settling, even as a super robot. "I can't touch Isami the way I used to, but at least now I can connect with him as my pilot. I can't have the same relationship we had before, but I can make a new one." I think this is the biggest reason they had him return to his human body in the end. It was a moment of him having to face Isami as himself, without a mask. He "came out," so to speak. I think it would have been cool to let him keep the robot body, but I get why they ended it the way they did (and honestly, if they ever make more, I fully expect them to give him a way to henshin into being the mech again.) Thanks again. I hope my thoughts make sense and were interesting or clarifying as to the appeal for other viewers, and that I didn't come off as combative. (2/2)

They made perfect sense, no worries!

I'm about to answer with my own thoughts on this and they're probably gonna be controversial.

I think Smith becoming Bravern actually lessens his character arc. Smith is introduced as basically a bait-and-switch. He's someone the viewer can almost instantly relate to: He's a young reckless guy with dreams of becoming a hero, inspired by the Robot Hero shows he watched when he was a kid. These shows that gave him hope in difficult times and inspired him to become a hero like the robot pilots in his shows.

And he's already half-way there, he's the pilot of a TS, that's as close to a super-robot he'll get in "real life".

Or so he thinks.

But then here comes Bravern. A seemingly one-to-one copy of every perfect mecha hero you've ever seen. And he doesn't choose Smith. Smith, who has been dreaming of this moment since he was a little boy whose parents died tragically. Smith, who's chosen to become a Titanstrider pilot because it's the closest he'd ever get to being like the characters he looked up to so much. Smith who might as well have "Shonen Protagonist" burned into his forehead with how many typical characteristics of the ideal hero he embodies.

And as you said, what does Smith do?

He accepts it.

He accepts that it's not him. He's not the Hero. He's not the Protagonist. Someone else is. Isami. The guy who already proved himself Smith's better during the training exercise. Who, in literally any other setting, would probably be the stock rival character.

So instead, Smith accepts that he can't be Bravern's pilot. But he's still a pilot. Just because he's not in the flashy mecha doesn't mean he can't do anything to help.

Then Lulu comes along and Smith finds a new purpose: As her guardian. He realizes, through her, that there's still people who need him. Including Isami and Bravern.

And then comes Superbia. The proverbial final nail in the coffin. Seemingly a second chance for Smith to step up to the plate. Nope! Superbia also cannot be piloted by Smith.

Here's where it finally clicks.

This is war.

There's no such thing as The Protagonist.

Everyone here still needs to work together to protect the Earth they love. A supporting role isn't suddenly unimportant just because a giant robot manifested a flaming sword. That's what Smith realizes.

So he forms the Brave Knights. He co-pilots with Lulu to help Bravern and Isami in any way that he can.

Enter Knuth.

A twisted facsimile of what Smith wanted at the beginning of the show: a super-mecha who is focused on him, only on him. And she's completely unhinged. Dangerous. Selfish.

But Smith has grown past her. Past the desire to be The Protagonist. He's accepted that he's still important. That super-mecha or not, he's still a hero protecting Earth.

...Except no, Smith was actually always The Protagonist. He was always destined to become Bravern and all his development until now? Doesn't matter anymore. Wish fulfillment fantasy ahoy. What are themes?

#bang bravern spoilers

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kookingtae · 3 years

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falling into you (pt. 8) PREVIEW

pt 1 | pt 2 | pt 3 | pt 4 | pt 5 | pt 6 | pt 7

→scenario: Jungkook’s innocence is like a breath of fresh air in your wild life, and though you know you’re toxic for him, you just can’t seem to stay away.

→genre: college au, slow burn, mutual pining, shy/nerd jk + bad girl oc (mature themes)

→a/n: so i’m not finished with pt 8 yet, since it’s such a climactic chapter it’s taking a bit longer than i anticipated unfortunately BUT i dont want u guys to think ive forgotten about it!!! i know u all are waiting so patiently, and i cannot thank you enough from the bottom of my heart <3 i hope this preview keeps you excited for what’s to come!

Jungkook could never face Y/N again.

God, how could he, knowing that he’d not only finished in five minutes like a pubescent teenager, but also in his pants while she was on top of him?

Embarrassment didn’t even begin to describe the mortification he felt. He’d never wanted the earth to swallow him whole as much as he did in that moment. Sure, he was aware of his slight social anxiety, the way he was constantly looking to bolt from uncomfortable situations—but this was different entirely. This was new territory for him; he’d never done anything remotely sexual with someone else, period, much less with the girl who hung the stars, moon, and sun in his eyes. What was he supposed to do? There was nowhere to escape to in his own bedroom, no running away from his problems that made him uncomfortable. No, he had to stand there with his head down and his crotch dripping wet while he practically begged her to leave. He had never been so ashamed of himself. He had never felt so pathetic.

But then Y/N surprised him like she never failed to do: she’d given him reassurance, another kiss even, while telling him that she actually enjoyed the experience—went so far as to say it was the best in her life. Now he knew she was lying to spare his feelings. Of all the men Y/N had been with, there was no way a virgin cumming untouched in his pants was the best of them. She was cruel to make him believe otherwise, to give him false hope.

He wouldn’t allow himself to think any differently. He couldn’t allow himself to get hurt.

Which was why he made it his mission to avoid her at all costs—something he’d gotten very good at over the past few months, and the past few weeks, specifically.

But in the same way he’d learned from the patterns of her daily routine and used them as a means to remain hidden, she’d also learned his and utilized them to her advantage as well. It was the only explanation as to how he was turning a corner inside the art building (about to take the rear exit, since she usually waited for him out front) and suddenly she was standing right in front of him.

He instantly skidded to a halt, heart rate shooting to astronomical levels and eyes widening on their own accord. “Y-Y/N,” he stuttered out involuntarily, the sight of her causing every single detail of their time spent together to come rushing back to him like a tidal wave ready to wipe him out.

As if he needed another excuse to think about the moment they shared that had changed him forever, about the way her moans sounded in his ear and her body felt on his lap and the way she touched his cheek, his neck, the way her lips felt on his skin, god help him—

Already he could feel the beginnings of a blush start to rise to his suddenly hot cheeks, and he cleared his throat and shifted his weight from one foot to the other to keep from springing yet another boner in front of her.

He slid his books in front of his waist, just in case.

While she usually approached him with the natural ease of self-confidence and charm, today she seemed worried, unsure. She chewed at her lower lip—something he didn’t think she really ever did, as he would certainly remember the way it stirred within him—and looked up at him beneath delicate lashes that framed her eyes.

He didn’t have it in him to keep from outright staring at her beauty.

“I… I missed you,” she finally murmured, and he felt the breath physically whoosh from his lungs to join his butterfly-filled stomach all the way at the floor.

It had been a few days since he’d last seen her, since she’d been in his room that night where they opened up about their past and confessed how they truly felt about one another and shared the most life-altering moment he’d ever experienced. He missed her too, god he missed her. He missed everything about her the moment she left his side—would picture her face in his mind as soon as she left his field of vision. But for some reason unknown to him, she was too kind to him, spared his feelings despite knowing what little experience he had. There was no way he’d be able to satisfy a girl—mentally, physically, emotionally—who could have anyone she wanted. Perhaps she pitied him. Either way, if she wouldn’t put a stop to it, then he would.

Or so he’d try, but alas, nothing ever went according to his plans where Y/N was concerned. And here she was, three simple words mumbled into existence and he couldn’t even remember his own name, much less why he’d been trying to fight this.

She seemed to expect he would say nothing—either that or she’d grown used to his silence—because before he had enough sense in him to even think about responding, she was speaking again. “How have you been?”

The question was asked with deliberate, genuine curiosity and concern; she really wanted to know if he was okay, how he was handling things after what had transpired between them. And no matter how hard Jungkook tried to fight this, fight her, fight himself, he was only human.

And so he stopped fighting.

“I– I missed you too,” he breathed out, and it was like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders and relocated to his gut. He tensed at his confession, mentally berated himself for his words even though she’d been the one to say them first. He felt like he couldn’t breathe, what with the way his throat locked up.

Though the second he witnessed the smile that sprang to her tantalizing lips, he felt as light as a feather floating in the breeze.

“You did?” Her eyes lit up, sparkled under the fluorescent hallway lights that still managed to capture all of her beauty despite the unflattering lighting. He didn’t think it was possible for any scenery, not even that of a dull and stuffy university building, to make her appear any less breathtaking than she always was.

“I was so worried after I left last week,” she continued without prompt. The mention of his premature finish had him stiffening in dread, though she didn’t let enough silence fester between her words for the anxiety to claw its way up his throat. “I didn’t want you to beat yourself up. I’ve noticed you tend to be too hard on yourself sometimes.” She glanced up at him with the hint of a sheepish grin dancing on her lips.

Her expression said it all: that’s an understatement.

And this shocked him to his core, because she was absolutely right.

Just how well had she gotten to know him in their time spent together over the last few months? And how? And why?

The last question would always boggle him until the end of time; he would never understand why she was interested in him. Why was he the one she had feelings for, when she claimed she never had feelings for anybody? Though he supposed he could ask himself the same thing: why did he feel things for Y/N that he had never felt for anyone else in his life? And the answer was quite simple, really: because it was her.

He didn’t know what about himself was so special to make him stand out in her mind, and as a result he still couldn’t help but be skeptical, even after her confession. But it wasn’t like he had any choice in the matter on what to do with that skepticism—not when his heart kept leading him back to her.

At some point after her accurate description of the inner turmoil that’s been plaguing his mind, his mouth had fallen open slightly. He couldn’t hide the surprise from his face even if he tried; he was speechless.

Y/N gazed up at him, not seeming in any hurry to rush the conversation along, and for that he was grateful. He’d never met somebody so patient and understanding before—just another reason to make Jungkook’s heart flutter with endearment. And it was no secret to himself anymore that he yearned to be in Y/N’s presence for as long as possible whether he was aware of it or not.

“You don’t have to be embarrassed, you know,” she continued as if she could read his mind, and that was when he realized the way his eyes avoided hers and the fact that his skin was the color of tomatoes must’ve been dead giveaways. “I meant it when I said that was the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced.”

Jungkook balked, practically choking on his spit at her forward, shameless words. He didn’t think he’d ever get used to the way she spoke her mind so openly without any fear holding her back. She’d gone through so much in her childhood, in her life—Jungkook not even knowing the half of it, he’s sure—and yet she was still so strong and brave and everything he wasn’t. He couldn’t help but admire the person she was today, despite all the prejudice and judgment he’d held for her when they first met.

He realized now that he was too quick to judge her, to write her off based on rumors and first impressions. He realized now that he was too quick to do that to a lot of people. Just how long had he closed himself off from others based on his skewed, morally righteous perspective? His whole life, if he had to say.

The epiphany that she was physically prying open his third eye with a crowbar, that he was now self aware and changing for the better for her—for himself—hit him all at once.

It was the most frightening sensation of his life, the introvert in him wanting to crawl back into his shell where it was safe and comfortable and dull. But deep down he knew it was also for the best.

“W-why?” He heard himself asking before he knew what he was doing. “Why do you keep saying that?”

He had to know why she insisted on standing by her statement that his mishap was not only hot, but the hottest ever. Why did she insist on lying to him, on giving him false hope? She spoke her mind in every other situation, or at least that’s what he assumed; why did she insist on sparing his feelings in this incident? Was he really that pathetic? Did she pity him that much?

She simply blinked at him once, twice, before: “Because I really like you, Jungkook.”

As if in slow motion, you could visibly see his eyes expand to the size of saucers at your words.

You would’ve found the sight comical had the situation been any different. But the way he continued to disbelieve that you could have feelings for him, that you could be attracted to everything about him despite who he was, despite his inexperience—it made your heart break in your chest. You now knew from where this inferiority complex stemmed—he’d told you himself about his family situation—and if anything, it made you want to rebuild his confidence that much more. He needed to see himself the way you saw him.

But you also didn’t want to overwhelm him, either. And you were more than willing to walk that fine line with Jungkook no matter how long it took.

“So are we on for a study sesh tonight?” You continued nonchalantly, wanting to return things to normalcy for him as much as possible before he ran away mid-conversation as he’d done so many times before. You wanted to ease his self-doubt so he’d stop avoiding you—like he’d been doing the past few days—as much as possible.

Jungkook blinked as if trying to adjust from the whiplash of your subject-change. “U–uh… if you want?”

“Of course I want to,” you replied without missing a beat, not caring how desperate you seemed so long as he didn’t question where you stood. You took a step forward, unable to help the intangible, magnetic draw you felt to him as you gazed up at him beneath your lashes. “That is… if you want to.”

You watched in agony as a gulp slowly raked its way down his throat.

“I–” his voice was hoarse before he cleared his throat. “I uh, can’t tonight. I have to study for math.”

You weren’t even sure how one studied for math, but you weren’t about to question the expert. “That’s fine! We could… do it tomorrow?”

Jungkook chewed at his bottom lip, an action he always did when he was internally struggling with something before he finally nodded his head yes in a slow, hesitant manner. “N–not in my room though,” he added as an afterthought, and when your gaze snapped to his he had a pleading expression in his eyes.

A mix of emotions rolled through you. On one hand, you were horrified at the possibility that he thought the only reason you wanted to study again was so that you could get in his pants. Which—okay, you’re not going to lie, you would love to have a repeat of last week—but that definitely wasn’t why you wanted to see him. He meant more to you than just a means to get off, which was what you’d thought of flings in the past. You didn’t want him to be just a fling, though.

You didn’t want to think of the meaning behind that fact right now, either.

But on another hand, you understood where Jungkook was coming from. Maybe it was because you’d studied him enough over the past few months to learn some of his behavior (for once you finally saw the appeal of studying), so you knew that level of intimacy was probably extremely overwhelming for Jungkook and he needed a moment to step back. Hell, it was even overwhelming for you, and that was saying something. Never had your senses, your heart, your body, your soul been attacked like that with such an abundance of emotional pleasure, and you hoped with all your might that Jungkook was feeling the same—that that was the reason he needed a breather from being alone with you, and not the fact that he just didn’t want to be intimate with you.

Unless…

Oh god, had you misread the situation entirely? Had Jungkook hated everything about that night?

Suddenly you were feeling sick to your stomach. The thought of you misunderstanding his confession—or worse, him changing his mind completely—made you want to escape to a dark and desolate stairwell and cry in the hidden nooks of the windowsill again; the irony that not only would you be pulling a Jungkook by escaping mid-conversation, but that the stairwell was also the place the two of you had your first real conversation, wasn’t lost on you.

“M–my roommate is staying in, studying for finals.” The sound of Jungkook’s voice was like a breath of fresh air whooshing into your lungs after almost drowning underwater. You blinked out of your inner turmoil, focusing on him. “So he’ll be there, i–in my room, this whole week.”

And suddenly your heart was warming with relief, hope, appreciation, like flowers blooming in the spring after a torrential downpour. Just when you thought you had him figured out, this enigma of a boy continued to surprise you. It was usually easy for you to hide your emotions—you’d been doing so for years, always wore a mask around others so that they couldn’t see the real you—and yet somehow, Jungkook must’ve sensed them anyway. He sensed the doubt, the pain, the fear that you vowed never to cage you crawling up your throat and threatening to consume you whole, and he eased it. He didn’t want you to misunderstand him. He wanted to reassure you.

If anything, that was just a testament to how Jungkook had broken down your walls—how much you had let him in, how well he was able to read the emotions you wanted to keep hidden. Your mask had begun to break, the real you showing through the cracks, and Jungkook was still standing here. He hadn’t run away.

You fought the urge to grab him and slam your lips onto his.

“Not in your room, then,” is all you managed to breathe out beneath a fluttering smile.

#jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #bts fanfic #bts smut #jungkook scenario #bts x reader #bts scenario #i hope this is good enough for the time being!!! im sorry its taking me so long to get pt 8 posted #u guys are the best i love u <3333

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speedmetalqueen · 3 years

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More works: Masterlist

part II

This was inspired by ‘Good 4 U’. This will have a part II.

I wrote this in honor of meeting Bakugous VA tomorrow so I wanted to write something!

Thank you for reading✨

September 17, 2021 Friday

“I can’t believe that asshole is already dating someone! Not even a month has passed and he’s already got himself a girlfriend!” You yelled your displeasure to Kirishima who was unlucky to be around you at the moment. “I’m sorry Y/N I didn’t even know, that’s totally unmanly.” He eyed you as you bore a death glare into your phone screen. Every social media was plastered with the new power couple- or so the title says. You were pissed- sure you were the one who called off the engagement, but you never thought Katsuki would move on much less so quickly.

Your hands trembled from pure hot rage as you clenched your teeth to stop yourself from crying. Kirishima being the sweetheart that he is wrapped his powerful arms around you into a tight embrace. “I’m here for you, let it out.”

The suffocating burning knot that occupied your throat crawled onto the surface as you let the tears finally break free. Wailing into Kirishima's chest as you grasp onto his shirt, holding on for dear life. You buried your snot covered nose into him as you cried endlessly. Your painful muffled screams bouncing through your shared apartment, and poor Kiri who had to witness one of his best friends go through something like this.

It felt as you were dying all over again, the feeling of being drowned in your emotions hitting hard. Your heart was already in pieces but this made them absolutely disintegrate into oblivion. This wasn’t supposed to happen you thought to yourself- you’d always believe Katsuki would wait for you- maybe even beg for another chance. You were so sure of it- he’d always say to you no matter what he would always love you and no one would ever replace you. You believed him, and that was your fault for being so selfish.

The next morning you woke up to a sore throat, the screaming didn’t stop till late into the night. It was indescribable, this feeling of betrayal and abandonment. Not even when you broke up with him did you cry this much- this was an emotional territory you’ve never experienced- and honestly it scared you. You were the one who called off the engagement- even letting the idea fester in your mind- making sure this was something you wanted to go through. So why did this hurt so fucking much? Why is this affecting you the way it is now?

You’re so toxic to yourself- scrolling through his social and tags- everything about her and him. Only causing you to go into hysterics again and again. You couldn’t help it- you were self destructing.

A couple of weeks passed and each day it got a little easier but also a little harder. You were so thankful for Kirishima- even though you felt so guilty for him having to pick up the pieces. The hardest days were when your agency would have to team up with Katsuki’s. You both were professional about it, but inside you were screaming in pain. Kirishima would always give you a glance assuring you that it was okay and he was there if you needed him.

You were sure Katsuki could feel the pain you were in- just because things ended between you both doesn’t mean all those years of being together he didn’t learn your behaviors and emotions- which was more embarrassing, having him able to read you like a book.

One day you overheard Kirishima talking on the phone- he was always bad at keeping his voice down.

“I don’t know man. I still think it’s pretty shitty that you got a girlfriend not long after Y/N dumped your ass.”

You guessed it was Katsuki on the other line. Why were they talking about you? Why did Kiri sound so irritated?

“Look you’re my bro and I’ll always have your back, but I cannot forgive you for the way you hurt her.” He paused. “She’s fine. But I hope someday you two can reconcile and fix this mess.”

There was nothing to fix- he moved on and you wanted to do the same.

That was a couple months ago back in the summer, it was winter now and you haven’t seen or worked with Katsuki since then. You were actually doing better- throwing yourself into your career and even climbing the hero ranks, earning you a spot to attend the Hero Awards. Kirishima was also invited as well, he climbed the hero ranks earning his spot at number 3 and you at number 2. They haven’t announced who was going to be number 1 but you were too excited to worry about that. You had asked Kirishima if he would be your plus one to the event, it was so much easier to coordinate since you were roommates.

When the night finally arrived you were having the time of your life, even seeing some old classmates that you haven’t seen since U.A.

The time came when they announced the new hero spots and you coming in at number 2. Everyone clapped and cheered as everyone was introduced- and now they waited on to see who was the new number 1.

If this was a cliche movie you would have guessed that the last person you would want to see was kissing your ex fiancé. You watched as Katsuki got up from his table and kissed his girlfriend on the lips as she smiled and mouthed something to him earning her a smirk.

Your mouth became dry and that all too familiar feeling in your throat returned. You watched as he passed you to receive his award and take the stage for his acceptance speech. You felt like you were stuck in a Petri dish and everyone was examining you through a microscope. Any little movement and the press would have a field day.

You swallowed hard trying to get rid of the constricting feeling in your throat. He looked so good, like this break up did everything for him. He looked happy and accomplished. He finally became the number 1 hero and leaving you in the past.

#byobxkitty #bakugou katsuki #katsuki bakugou #bakugou x reader #bakugou x yn #bakugou x you

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avidrawsthings · 2 years

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Since the post detailing the bullying Reina endured wont show up why not just do a recap instead?

IDK what is it with this damn site refusing to let me publish it lol It won’t even let me publish the second draft I made and instead just keeps giving me those annoying little cutesy error messages. Third time’s the charm I guess. One day I’ll learn to actually keep things very brief.

Going forward, trigger warning for harassment, bullying and sl*t-shaming. I’ll keep it as brief as possible and divide it in sections to keep it organized. Images will be included to provide visuals while also avoiding the massive wall of text this would be otherwise. Since I want to cover everything in a single post, this is gonna be quite lengthy despite my efforts to shorten them as much as possible. There will be 6 parts total. Sorry in advance. While each part is short it’s still a long post. XD Hope it’s a decent read for those interested.

Context regarding Merula’s characterization: Thanks to a number of factors playing out differently, the Merula in my setting had become incredibly toxic by Year 5. Basically she faced actual consequences for everything she’s done since Year 1. Since Reina’s relation to Ricardo (Jacob) was never public, Merula didn’t have the MC’s scrutiny as an excuse to get away with her bullying. As a result, she gained a reputation of being violent and destructive due to lashing out at the foreign transfer student (Reina)for no real reason. The frequent comparisons to her Death Eater parents didn’t help matters either. Instead of reflecting and learning to improve herself, Merula just blamed everything on Reina and let those negative feelings fester over the years, turning her into the person she became by Year 5.

Tldr: Merula’s a straight up villain in Year 5.

Pt.1: Beginning

As Reina had sensed pure malice from Rakepick the moment they met back in Year 4, she’s refused to be anywhere near the woman. Into year 5 this extended to Reina refusing to take Defense Against the Dark Arts, and she never became one of her apprentices. Reina resolved to break the curse on her terms and worked alongside Rowan, Talbott, Ismelda, Barnaby, Jae, Tulip, Badeea and Chiara. Despite the stresses that came with it, for Reina it wasn’t anything she couldn’t handle.

The following November, Reina had attempted to warn Merula about Rakepick’s true intentions, but the Slytherin girl wasn’t having it and instead lashed back rather violently. With this Reina was completely done with Merula, however Merula wasn’t done with her.

Merula wanted Reina to be miserable and be driven to leave the school. It wasn’t just about being the strongest witch anymore. Reina’s attempts at warning her became her excuse for making plans to ruin the girl’s life by any means necessary.

Merula approached Emily Tyler of all people, as she knew perfectly well that the petty Gryffindor had it out for Reina as well. Two years prior Reina cursed and humiliated her after she (Emily) insulted Bill. Emily and Merula formed an alliance to get back at Reina.

Thanks to everything she gathered about Reina over the years of spying on her, Merula passed on any info to Emily that could be used to incite some much needed damage. Emily twisted that information around into some awful rumors.

Pt.2: Rumors

The rumors started by depicting Reina as a power-obsessed glory-hound, seeking out the vaults for nothing more than personal gain. When Rowan attacked her in the courtyard while under the Imperious Curse, this gave the witnessing students the impression that they were fighting and Rowan has had enough.

Reina’s refusal to work with Rakepick was seen as her viewing the woman as competition. It was that rumor specifically that began to drive a wedge between her friends. When everyone gathered at the library, Reina made it clear why she avoided Rakepick. By that point she’s always been honest, especially as Reina has always been a bad liar and her friends knew that. This time should’ve been no different, but Reina quickly found out some of her friends were already doubting her.

Charlie would be the first to question her claims, and while he had no ill intentions whatsoever, to Reina it felt like a slap to the face. Although she didn’t have proof to her claims, all of them knew she’d never lie. This is what led to the groups splitting in two: those that sided with Reina due to their own mistrust of Rakepick consisted of Rowan, Talbott, Ben, Tulip and Chiara. Barnaby, Ismelda, Jae and Badeea would join them later.

During that time Penny was not in the best mental state thanks to Beatrice’s situation. Merula took advantage of this and manipulated her over time into hating Reina. Penny was led to believe Reina didn’t care about the afflicted students at all, and the earlier rumors weren’t helping her case. Seeing Reina celebrating their second Quidditch victory with her teammates only enraged Penny, leading to her verbally lashing out at Reina in front of the entire common room.

Penny only stopped when Skye angrily told her to back off, and Sprout demanded to speak with her. Her friendship with Reina was severed on very bad terms. Merula had no real gain to this other than causing as much harm as possible. She proudly admitted it to Barnaby and Ismelda when they confronted her about it. The two officially cut ties with Merula at that point, disgusted and troubled at her lack of remorse.

Reina did her best to keep moving forward, but now with the added loss of her friendship with Penny and sensing nothing but hate from her, she now felt overwhelmed. By the following Quidditch practice, she fainted and had to be hospitalized after Orion couldn’t get a pulse.

Just as she recovered, the rumors became far worse.

Pt.3: Harassment, Bullying and Vandalism

After Christmas break, Emily spun more rumors that were ensured to hit Reina where it hurt and ruin her positive reputation.

With the knowledge that Reina took secret trips with Bill and Charlie the year prior to the Forbidden Forest, and again earlier in the year to the Prefects Bathroom (before the group split), the true context was left out and things were spun into something far more explicit.

Being portrayed as a whore caused a good chunk of Reina’s Muggleborn classmates to turn against her. What made it more difficult for her was the disdain she sensed from them because of things about her that were nowhere near true. This became one of those times Reina hated her Empathy and found herself wishing she could either shut it off or never have it again.

Soon her items, desks and Quidditch robes got vandalized and had terrible words etched/painted on them. Spells would get thrown at her out in the halls and she had to stop answering mail out of worry they were tampered with. While she still fought back and cursed those responsible, these people would not let up now that they got a reaction out of her.

She now had to deal with accusations of doing explicit things to not only get on the Quidditch team, but also to get all of her good grades. When the professors quickly caught wind of this they were absolutely furious. After some stupidly bold students confronted Snape thinking the rumors were true, they received detentions for the rest of their time in school, and failed out of his class. It didn’t take long for him to find out Merula had some involvement in this.

During Hufflepuff’s third Quidditch match, Reina was deliberately injured far more than her teammates by members of the opposing team. Though they were disqualified and banned, Reina had to be hospitalized for weeks because of her injuries. This caused her to miss her Quinceanera (15th birthday), something she had been looking forward to nearly all her life. Her family assured her they’d have the party for her that following summer, putting her at ease.

After being released from the hospital wing, Reina was accompanied by Rowan and Chiara back to their dorm to get her books while everyone else was at lunch. To their horror they find Reina’s bed, past gifts and belongings completely destroyed.

The only things she had left were the clothes on her back and the items in the schoolbag she was carrying. Devastated and reaching her breaking point, Reina ran off campus and went into hiding. The only ones that knew of her location were Rowan, Talbott and Madam Rosmerta. When she saw how distressed Reina was, she gave the girl her brother’s apartment to use.

Rowan and Ismelda gathered with several of the others, collected all necessary evidence and publicly exposed Emily, Merula and the other bullies, who were then punished accordingly. Although Reina’s name had finally been cleared, her sudden “disappearance” started a new set of rumors. This time around Emily, Merula and the group of bullies were met with suspicion from the other students, thinking the goons were involved in her vanishing somehow.

Merula was now subjected to harassment of her own and once again had to deal with accusations of being just like her Death Eater parents.

Reina would not return to the school for the next 50 days. Before she left, thanks to Duncan and Rowan she had reached out to Peeves by bringing up his friendship with Ricardo, and offered to create some chaos-inducing spells with his input, which caught his attention. While they were making some decent progress, it was put to a halt with her sudden departure.

Not pleased with the rude interruption to his chaotic plans, he decided to give Merula an especially difficult time after learning she drove Reina away to take her place. When Rakepick called Merula out on her behavior, the Slytherin volunteered to acquire the painting by herself (not that anyone wanted to work with her anyway) as a form of redemption.

Pt. 4: Retaliation

Although Reina was out of the way, it wasn’t enough for Merula. Still desperate for Rakepick’s approval, she began to sabotage just about anyone she felt would get in her way, including fellow apprentices.

Looking to get even, Merula and the bullies went after Rowan (glasses were broken), Ben (ambushed and beaten badly), Barnaby (ambushed with curses and hospitalized) and Ismelda (ambushed and her hair forcibly cut). Charlie’s arm was purposely broken in Gryffindor’s next Quidditch match, while Bill would be hospitalized thanks to one of his books being cursed.

Merula and some goons openly confronted Talbott on the courtyard as he was reading, and the Slytherin girl not only exposed his relationship with Reina, but also mocked his dead parents. She bragged how she overheard his conversation with Reina 2 years prior as they searched for his missing necklace and why it was so important to him.

Despite being furious and disgusted, Talbott maintained his calm long enough to realize the thugs were there to make sure he couldn’t get away. He was internally thankful he Obliviated her those years back after she found out he was an Unregistered Animagus, as without a doubt she would’ve exposed that as well just to spite him.

He was able to overpower the goons after using Wind Magic.

With Merula being the last one standing, he challenged her to a duel on the spot. She gladly accepted but was quickly defeated after Talbott called her out on everything she had done, ending by sarcastically wishing her luck in acquiring the painting from Peeves. By that point she had been trying for over a week.

25 days into hiding, Reina was in a much better mental state. She continued her work with Peeves in secret after having Rowan and Duncan pass the message along. Reina found the perfect targets in the form of all her tormentors, and was eager to get back at them for everything they put her and her friends through.

With her new resolve, her wand would transform into a staff, signifying she was ready for the next step in her magical journey. The staff allowed her to use stronger magic and she soon got to work.

Pt.5: Consequences

After the awful things she said to Reina months prior, Penny had since been shunned by most of her fellow Hufflepuffs. A lot of them thought she was working with Merula and avoided her entirely because of it. While untrue, all that mattered to Penny was Beatrice’s well-being.

Unfortunately she drove away her friends as well, angrily lashing out at them out of belief they sided with Reina, when in truth all they wanted was to help. Ismelda would be the one to finally snap her out of it by calling her out on her behavior, and making Penny hit the realization that she hurt Reina so badly there’s a high chance she’ll never be forgiven. This would haunt her for the rest of her time at school.

Merula herself lost all of Rakepick’s trust and respect after the woman figured out what she had done.

Rakepick was fully aware of what Reina said about her and didn’t care in the slightest. The girl still prioritized breaking the curse and it was pretty obvious Reina would still join the rest of the group when they headed to the next vault. While evil in this setting, Rakepick still had a degree of respect for Reina and the apprentices, even if they were only useful pawns to her.

If there’s one thing Rakepick hated, it was having her time wasted, which is exactly what Merula had accomplished. She only decided to give the girl one last chance after she pleaded to get the painting from Peeves herself. Rakepick knew it was next to impossible for Merula to do it on her own due to her own decisions and behavior. The only way Merula would contribute to the chaos Peeves wanted was to be subjected to it herself, and Reina made sure she would.

Two weeks after Merula took on the task, she along with Emily and the other bullies appeared to have been struck with astronomical levels of bad luck. It all started after they received black roses in the mail, while Merula found a bunch on her bed. The only warning she received were that black roses symbolized hate, and whoever sent them was after the recipients now.

The group got subjected to all manner of pranks left and right not just from Peeves, but a few anonymous students (Tonks, Tulip and Jae). The pranks worsened over time, ranging from items like Glitter and Confetti Bombs manifesting out of thin air to attack them, pies to the face, Stink Bombs in their school bags and even a Jinx that left most of them in clown makeup that wouldn’t come off for hours. Knowing that the group was cursed, the other students avoided them.

Pt.6: Resolution

Reina at that point returned to the school, barely paying attention to the surprise her classmates had upon seeing her. The only thing she cared about was seeing the work she created with Peeves’ help: all of the spells inflicted on her tormentors. The Clown Face Jinx was actually Ricardo’s creation, and Reina used it at Peeves’ request. When Merula found out Reina was back, she angrily demanded the painting from Peeves after dishing out some (empty) threats, only to be met with paint splatter and confetti bombs. Seeing Reina as a threat to her goals, Merula headed to the courtyard where she found the girl waiting for her.

Merula demanded a duel to settle things between them once and for all, and Reina obliged. She’s defeated thanks to Reina’s new array of spells thanks to her staff. Merula makes one last ditch attempt at getting back at Reina by claiming she’s the one wasting everyone’s time with petty self-serving drama, but by that point no one buys it. Her name had already been cleared while Merula’s was pretty much done.

To get back at Merula one last time, Reina reveals the role she played in the pranks and that she received the real painting from Peeves after she arrived back at the castle, making Merula’s earlier threats against him even more pointless. She decides to put her foot down and make it clear going forward that Merula (and anyone else) would never bother her or her friends ever again, nor would she spy on them like she had done so much in the past. The choice was simple: leave them alone or face the consequences. The pranks were just a warning. Merula didn’t say anything after that.

Later on, several of the bullying thugs were expelled. Emily would have to repeat her 7th year due to poor scores on her N.E.W.Ts, barely avoiding expulsion herself. In regards to Merula, the Ministry decided keeping her at school was the logical option. Knowing well of who her parents are, and with the documentation of her past and current actions, they didn’t want to deal with the child of Death Eaters being set loose on the Wizarding World to do who knows what.

In the end, Reina got vindication after Rakepick revealed her true colors at the buried vault and attempted to kill her and her friends. The vault crew consisted of Bill, Charlie, Merula, Ben, Penny, Rowan and Reina herself. The friends that doubted her words apologized, while she herself also apologized for how she handled it. Penny kept her distance from her friends, both to focus on Beatrice and also due to feeling shame for her actions. By that point Reina had no interest in speaking to her.

It took Merula being subjected to the Cruciatus Curse by Rakepick to finally understand Reina was right about the woman all along. Had she listened to Reina’s warning rather than carry out her little revenge plot, she could’ve been better prepared. Not that Merula would ever admit it outright.

Had she been just the least bit rational, she’d at least still have Barnaby and Ismelda on her side, but instead she was all alone with only her thoughts for company. Deep down she felt she deserved all the bad things that happened to her. The only thing that kept her going was her desire to get revenge on Rakepick, and was more than willing to throw her entire life away to do it.

#ask avi #hphm #my art #reina cortez oc #hogwarts mystery #hphm reina #hphm mc #talbott winger #hphm talbott #rowan khanna #merula snyde #emily tyler #hphm rowan #hphm merula

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autumnslance · 3 years

Note

Character breakdown: Fordola

Give me a character and I’ll break them down:

How I feel about this character:

She's the child of collaborators, reviled by her own people by association, and sees that from a young age, her resentment over her father's death (defending her from their own people!) allowed to fester.

She saw no other options for safety, security, advancement, than to play the Garleans' game; she saw how they had let her father die, and resented them too, but they had the power and playing to their rules she could "show them."

She's a child of propaganda and the same toxic environment that made Gaius a believer who was blind to the faults in the system--but Fordola, without the same privileges as Gaius, saw those faults and railed against them, hoping to scratch a place for herself where she wouldn't have to fear more rocks and insults.

She's only 19 and it's not hard to see how this all went horribly, terribly wrong--and how she can still turn it around for herself. She knows she won't get everyone's forgiveness and that's all right; all she wants is to prove her own worth as a person who fights for her homeland, in a far better way than trying to fruitlessly "prove it' to the Imperials.

I think Estinien drawing parallels between himself and Fordola is interesting; in both cases, they need idealist companions like Alphinaud and Arenvald to keep them grounded and bring out their best natures. Fordola's still learning how to navigate this new world she never expected to live in, one where the Ala Mhigans could and did defeat the Garleans and took back their home. She's got a lot to make up for, and is prepared to work for it.

She still doesn't deserve a kill switch collar to keep her in line while Gaius gets to move freely and then become a resistance leader himself in Werlyt though. It's really grating how the characters' treatments are shown and frankly Fordola's got the best written and paced redemption arc so far out of all the antagonists.

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

Sorta Arenvald? He's hinted at perhaps having a crush on her in the SMN 80 cap quest, but she'd eat the boy alive, probably.

At this point, though, she's really gotta focus more on who she is and where she wants to go from this rock bottom position.

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

Arenvald and Fordola as bros. He genuinely cares and wants to help her as she rebuilds her identity and beliefs, and while she's still not sure about how that works, she's begrudgingly grateful. And just as worried for the big blond puppy as the rest of us.

My unpopular opinion about this character:

That I think she's a well-written character with a decent arc and deserves her shot to learn from her mistakes, become a better person, and be redeemed for the things she did as an ignorant kid in an abusive colonialist situation.

She may not be everyone's cup of tea, but she's not a "bad character" in the sense of being mishandled or underwritten like a lot of others, including plenty of favorites. That she can draw strong reactions due to her bitter personality and her terrible choices actually shows that.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

I want to see her reconcile with her mom. Maybe learn Hrudolf survived Specula Imperatoris and see how that goes, too.

#Final Fantasy XIV #Lyn Prompts #Fordola rem Lupis

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rosezure · 3 years

Text

Todoroki Family - My Opinion

MANGA SPOILERS FOR BNHA/MHA ahead!

CW: parental neglect and abuse, anxiety, therapy, Touya Todoroki/Dabi, Enji Todoroki/Endeavor, spoilers, swearing (please remind me if I forgot anything).

Disclaimer: All of the information on the Todoroki family dynamics is based on my interpretation of what’s been (so far) revealed through the anime and manga. These are all just opinions, you are free to agree or disagree respectfully. I do not wish to invalidate anyone’s opinion. Family dynamics have always been a very sensitive and triggering subject to me, so I hope that you respect that if you wish to discuss this with me.I would like to give my own two cents on the Todoroki family situation. As someone that has dealt with abuse and neglect in a (slightly) similar way my whole life, this story hits very close to home. I will try to be as thorough and objective as possible. But, feel free to call me out (respectfully) if there is anything ambiguous or if problematic. Thank you.

I am going to focus on Touya/Dabi and Enji’s story. I do not know enough to talk about Rei’s role in all of this, so I will not mention her. But, I might update this as new chapters come out.

I will talk about Dabi’s early years by referring to him as Touya since that was his identity at the time. Any comments about him as an adult will be referring to him as Dabi.

I was a psychology student for about two years, and when we learned about child development, here is what I gathered:

When you are a child, all you want is to be loved, to be safe. This is essential to a child, as it is what develops them into a healthy and independent adult. And, this is especially important concerning parents or guardians. Effective parenting practices ensure that the child will have a better chance at developing according to their age and needs. This will grant the kids skills that they will use and perfect as they grow up. In other words, children that are well-taken care of have a higher chance of being strong, healthy, and emotionally developed adults.

When a parent or guardian is ignorant of how they can impact their child’s growth, it has many negative effects. In Touya’s case, Enji Todoroki was clueless. This does not mean Enji should not be held responsible just because he was ignorant. Enji knew he was not being the best parent, but he did not know how exactly. And, at the time he was blinded by his greed and ambition, so he would not have been paying attention to that. Even so, (personally) I do not think parents are afforded the luxury of ignoring their bad parenting if they are made aware of it. They are responsible for another human’s life and growth. They should be held accountable if the child develops issues and hurts themselves or even others.

With that being said, Enji Todoroki was a horrible but clueless parent. From what I have understood from the manga and the anime, at first, he had no idea why Shoto was so "rebellious" (in his opinion). He also seemed to not understand Natsuo and Fuyumi. So I am led to believe that he was, at the time, oblivious to how much he negatively impacted Touya.

Touya just wanted his father’s affection. If that meant grueling training and preparing to become a hero to defeat All Might, then so be it. It was the attention and affection he knew. He was not led to believe otherwise. Touya's sole positive interactions came from him showing he could fulfill his father’s sick dream. In a child’s mind, that was the only way to secure parental love and approval: To train as hard as possible and become what his father so desperately wished for.

Then his hair started turning white. He started getting injured because of his quirk. His only source of positive attention, his only hope for affection, was killing him. And it had to be stopped. I am sure in Touya’s mind, this meant he would not be loved anymore.

And then Enji stopped training him. Natsuo was born. Shoto was born. And Touya felt that his source of love was directed to that baby. The baby that Enji saw as a success. Enji made Touya feel like a failure, a broken toy. And he was being replaced by a newer, shinier one: His brother.

When he tries to attack Shoto, he is trying to take back his place. Touya was trying to gain back his father’s love and attention.

Enji wanted to prevent Touya from hurting himself more. But he failed to communicate that. Instead, his words made it seem like his plan was foiled. Touya wasn’t enough, so Enji’s chance of using him to end All Might vanished. Touya wasn’t what Enji needed anymore.

Touya’s world didn’t collapse all at once. It didn’t even crack all at once. From what I understood, it was a collection of hairline fractures that never healed. It was a dislocated shoulder that was never put back in its place and was left to hang. It was a pounding headache that only grew more and more painful over time.

When Dabi was born, Touya had been buried in bruises, paper cuts, minor broken bones, chronic illnesses. Touya was killed by exhaustion and pain. He didn’t die at one point, he was dying all along.

As someone who suffers from chronic issues, I know that the somatization of symptoms and other sources of pain can turn a simple illness into something much more serious. Think of it as a butterfly effect, but all inside one person: Every single negative experience, from both outer and inner sources, all summed and turned into one massive festering wound.

Touya’s mind was a living open wound, it seems.

So Dabi was born. To seal the wound shut. Clean it? No. Protect it? Maybe.

But this particular type of wound (the psychological, emotional one) if left untreated can become infected. And infected wounds are harder and more painful to clean and treat.

Dabi’s mind is a bandaid over an infected wound. It seems objectively okay, maybe even sane. But he’s clearly in pain. He’s not in his right mind. His decisions all stem from the pure rage and anger of a child that was abandoned.

What chapter 300 brought was the perspective of a child that just wanted to be loved. That's all he wanted. And the only love he knew was when Enji Todoroki trained with him, no matter how gruesome and painful it must've been.

I'm gonna briefly and superficially compare his situation to mine. Of course, I didn’t suffer half of the pain he did, and I won't go into any detail as to not trigger myself. But, I only got attention when I was either extremely sick or I was needed as a trophy child of some sort. Even then, if I was ill, the attention I got was so I could get well soon and go back to being "useful". I was an extension of them, at best. But I still craved their attention. I still do in a way to this very day. It's not something that just goes away once you realize how toxic and abusive it is.

No matter how much pain I’m in, no matter how love-starved I am, I still want their approval. Inside me, there’s still a scared child, crying out for her parents to love her. That child is now my responsibility. I have to give her love, nurture her so she can grow with me.

Does that make sense?

I have no idea how Dabi is feeling. And I don’t think we’ll ever truly know. He is fictional, after all, and there’s no telling if Horikoshi will be delving into that.

But maybe Touya is still inside Dabi, crying, screaming to be loved. And Dabi is trying his best to tend to that child, but he never truly grew up to know how to take care of another being. Dabi doesn’t know how to take care of himself emotionally.

I’m learning because I, thankfully, have access to therapy. But it hurts. It hurts to realize the ones that were meant to take care of you, didn’t. It hurts to look into yourself and see a shaking, teary-eyed child begging for crumbs of love.

Now, with the whole "redemption" thing being debated, here's my own personal opinion. You don't have to agree, and I'm not asking you to. Again, this is just how I view it. As a survivor, I'd be relieved to see my parents try. The damage is done, true. I'll never regain my childhood. I'll never have what people with different, better, parents have. The past can't be reversed. And I'm seeing it repeat itself with my little brother. But, if there's a minimal chance that my parents can own up to what they did, that they open themselves up to changing their behavior and learning, then maybe we can build something new.

Build. Not rebuild. The foundation of our past relationship was rotten from the beginning. A new one must be built. A new foundation must be developed if we ever hope to make something of our relationship.

If the Todorokis, really want to reconcile, reconnect, rebuild, then they must start from scratch. If Enji Todoroki wants that, he’s gonna have to start from zero, from nothing. And I'm not entirely sure if Endeavor is doing that, but he is trying, somehow. We don't know for sure if he even has the emotional skills to do so. We can't say for sure that he's got what it takes to man up, own up and learn. But, he seems to be trying.

And that's something I've accepted I'll never have.

So if there's at least a 1% chance that he is truly trying, that Enji wants to redeem himself, then let him. Let their family try and heal together if that's what they want.

I'm not sure about the Japanese culture when it comes to family. But where I come from, a family is an important base of our personal and social development, to the point that reconciliation more often than not is the best route.

Still, I know it's not for everyone. So I respect you if you believe he doesn't deserve a chance. I understand if you say Enji Todoroki should be kept far away from his family. You're right, and you're valid.

But, please, please, if the author decides that he redeems himself and does try his best to start a new relationship with his family, let him. Let them heal. Together. Let them try and make up for the lost time in the best way in the present. Let them rebuild.

I know I'd give anything to rebuild my family.

Let Touya be healed and put Dabi to rest. Touya needs to be loved, he needs to be taken care of like he never was as a child. Dabi needs to be told he tried. He needs to be told he did what he could.

But Dabi is also an adult now. He’s got legal responsibilities. The pain and devastation he’s caused and helped cause can’t be overlooked. He needs help, but he also had to be held accountable.

Touya/Dabi needs to face himself and start over. He needs to face the man he’s become and at the same time take care of the child he wasn’t able to be.

If the Todoroki family is reconciled, I dearly hope he gets to be a part of this new book. Not a new chapter, they need to throw that whole book away and start a new one. And, if possible, I’d love to see someone like me get the ending I won’t be getting.

I hope this made some sense at least. Again, if anything is unclear, ambiguous, or problematic, let me know and I’ll do my best to correct or remove the bad parts. If you’ve read this far, thank you. If you share a similar experience, I’m sorry, and I’m here for you.

#bnha #mha #bnha 300 #bnha 301 #bnha spoilers #bnha discussion #touya todoroki #dabi #enji todoroki #shoto todoroki #todoroki family #fuyumi todoroki #natsuo todoroki #rei todoroki #touya #shoto #endeavor #endeavour

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think-blot · 4 years

Text

Timeless Pt.2

Summary: For centuries, Y/N has been Klaus’ well kept secret. An innocent soul that cherished him despite his short comings, that loved him no matter the monster he became. She was his, he was hers, and he wasn’t keen on letting that go. Of course, that kind of love is perfect leverage and the Salvatore brothers have just learned about her existence.

Word Count: 1768

A/N: some insight on Y/N. i hope you enjoy, sorry for any mistakes

PT. 1

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Despite where they had kept her, the Salvatore residence was delightfully impressive. She left her cell to explore the endless hallways and tall doorways, beyond mesmerized as she walked behind the brothers. Her cottage seemed childlike in comparison. Once they reached the living area, where sun seemed to collect as it came through the full length windows, she tried desperately to hold in a gasp. Before either brother could stop her, she rushed to get a closer look, screaming in agony instead of delight as the sun touched her skin. Hands wrapped around her, rushing her to a place to sit as the sun was snuffed out like a candle. "Why?" Tears flooded her eyes as she stared at Stefan, lip quivering at the idea that they had betrayed the little trust she had allowed them.

He let her go as if he was the one being burned, fiddling with something in his pocket until he could pull it out. "I'm sorry about that, I was going to give you this back after you ate something." In his hand was a golden necklace with a dark crystal as a pendant. Her hand rushed to her neck, shocked that she hadn't noticed its absence. Niklaus had given it to her the first time he had to leave, she had never seen it as anything but a gift of love.

She takes it carefully, letting out a sigh of relief as the weight of it settles against her chest. "Its absence caused the sun to harm me?" Her eyes are wide like a baby dear and, though it's his first instinct to doubt, a part of the Salvatore brother knew she wasn't just acting.

"You don't know the first thing about being a vampire, do you?" Y/N pulled back, offended despite the truth in his statement. The moment she was turned, Niklaus had guided her through the whole experience. She didn't even know how to hunt for something on her own, let alone compel it.

"I've never had to." She doesn’t look at him as she admits it, focusing on the feeling of her skin healing itself instead. A blood bag was thrown at her as Damon walked into the living room, Stefan catching it before it hit her in the face. It seemed she needed to work on her reflexes if she wanted to exist around the brothers.

"You really are a princess, huh?" Damon lounged across from her, staring at her deeply in an unnerving way. "Plump and waiting in the tower for Prince Charming. Spoiled."

She hated the word as it left his mouth, dripping in spite and something like hate. There was an emotion she didn't know she could feel festering under her skin and, before she knew it, the elder brother was trapped under her, blood beginning to spill from the indents under her fingers around his neck. " You will not speak to me in that way." There was no smirk as she growled above him, the hold on him not allowing any more foul words to leave his lips.

"I suppose I should've warned you of the violence streak dear Y/N had before my brother compelled it from her." The new voice distracted her enough to let go of Damon, the vampire taking a deep breath and glaring at his own brother as he did. Stefan could only shrug.

She couldn't remember a time when this anger had filled her and yet a man who had known her as long as her lover was familiar with it. There was too much going through her head as she stared at Elijah. Not only had Niklaus trusted him with the one thing he held close to his heart, but she had trusted him with her innermost doubts and insecurities. Betrayal was bitter on her tongue as she hissed, "You."

"I realize you're upset but I did what was best-" She was nowhere near as strong as an original, though she was close in age they were more capable than her in every sense of the word. However, sharing a bedroom with one gave her the upper hand she didn't know she would need as she rushed Elijah. He moved to sidestep her, a move Niklaus often used to get the upper hand, allowing her to catch him and throw him as far as her body would allow. The crash covered the sound of Stefan making his way to stand next to her, offering a calm touch despite the sudden understanding of why Klaus was so obsessed with her. Elijah stood with an air of calm that she used to appreciate, brushing off his suit and ignoring the blood that dripped on his face. "Is it out of your system?"

Y/N straightened her posture, breathing in deeply and pushing the fire down, "Explain yourself to me, Elijah."

"You've spent too much time with my brother, Y/N." He smiled to himself, the sight causing her to bristle. "May we have the room, boys?" Damon left, muttering under his breath that this was his home while Stefan paused to look at the two. When he realized he was already invisible to them, he sighed and followed his brother. The moment he knew they could no longer hear them, his posture loosened the slightest bit. He smirked, "And then there were two."

-----

She sat across from Elijah, the table she had thrown him into now a buffer between them. There are memories of a faraway life dancing in her head, one where Elijah was the first to steal her admiration from the world. It's no wonder Niklaus took the memory of him away from her. "They fed you vervain, it stops any kind of compulsion," Elijah said, always the one to get straight to business before anything. "Unfortunately, it's also extremely toxic to us. Hence, the burning."

"That is not the explanation I wanted." Y/N replied with a glare he hadn't seen in centuries seemingly tattooed on her face. He had missed this side of her.

"My brother has kept a lot from you, most of it behind the guise of your own safety." He continued, "With his new motivation to find the cure, I thought it would be beneficial that you were yourself again."

"At the expense of your brother's trust? He will connect it to you sooner rather than later, Elijah."

A sad smile tugged on his lips, the worry from the woman across from him bittersweet. "Yes, but you no longer live the way he wishes. Not until he finds us, that is." Of course, the distraction of her disappearance was more than helpful in creating a plan regarding Klaus. There was even a small part of Elijah that hoped without his brother's compulsion, she would realize that not only is there a world outside her cabin but that there's a love outside of him. "Is that not worth it for the time being?"

His question echoed throughout her mind, the idea of an entire world being at her exposure beyond overwhelming. Then there was Niklaus and the sudden mixture of emotions she felt towards her lover. She had always hated when he was angry, never sure why, but as she wondered what would happen when he found her images of torn-apart bodies and blood-stained floors flooded her. Was it smart to hope against him? "There's more to what you say."

"You know our family well." He stood carefully, making his way to her with all the time in the world. He offered her his hand, "Come, let me show you what you've missed."

-----

It's a two-day journey back to Mystic Falls, though it doesn't escape Klaus that he had no idea as to how long they had her. Anger fueled his every move as he crossed the town line, going straight to the Salvatore house with no other thought than getting her back. He's forced backward as he attempts to charge through the doors, a scream forcing itself out of his lungs. "Salvatore!" He took a breath, a worthless attempt to calm himself down. There was shuffling coming from inside the home but nothing that sounded like his love.

The door opened to a smug Damon, leaning against the wall just out of Klaus' reach, "Well isn't this a pleasant sight. To what do we owe the pleasure, your majesty?" He rushed as close to the doorway as he could, glaring at the other vampire with enough malice that a human could feel it collect in the air. "Seems the owner of the house never invited you in." He tutted.

"I will burn your beloved home to the ground." Klaus seethed, a deadly smirk on his face as he imagined the scene.

"You might lose some precious cargo doing that." The murderous haze around him cleared as he stared at the elder Salvatore's neck. Deep indents were still healing, dried blood caking the neck of his shirt, the sight filling him with pride like never before.

"She can't be used against me, though I admire your hope of the contrary." Klaus smirked, "All you've done is make Elena's death that much more painful." The façade Damon held broke ever so slightly at the mention of Elena, proving that the two brothers were weak when it came to the doppelganger. He rose his voice for her to hear, still staring Damon down as he did, "My love! Do what you must, find me when you tire of these nitwits." He left without another word, full confidence that he would be reunited with her by the end of the week.

Carefully, she tiptoed out of the hallway and watched as he walked away. She wanted nothing more than to run to him, to yell his name, and feel his arms around her as he whisked her away from this new world around her. But as her heart tugged to be with him, her feet stayed glued to where they were. He was allowing her some time, no doubt suspecting that they had taken away his compulsion, which meant he wanted her to learn. She took a deep breath, Niklaus' blessing taking away the hesitation she once had. She'd go back to him and they'd be happy, but first, she needed to know what was going on. She looked to Elijah, despite his betrayal he was the only one she could trust, and with a smile, he offered his arm to her. The moment Niklaus was no longer in sight, she wrapped her hand around his arm and readied herself for the new world.

-----------

Tag list

@misselsbells06

@marvel-ousnesss

@awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce

@iliveforthefandom04

#klaus mikaelson #klaus mikaelson fanfic #klaus mikaelson imagine #klaus x reader #klaus x you #klaus mikaelson x you #klaus mikaelson x reader #timeless

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dauntingdarling · 4 years

Text

Reviewing Cursed (Netflix)

So I finally jumped on the bandwagon for this show and I’ve got some thoughts: (spoilers)

Bad Stuff:

For all the hype I’ve read about the show, I was expecting the main lead to be at least more than she was. Nimue was a disappointment and honestly is one of the weaker parts of the show.

The 2nd weakest part being Nimue x Arthur relationship

And I’m not going to even start on the effects in this show, JESUS

While I don’t necessarily blame the hollowness of Nimue’s character on the actress Katherine, (I will say the reason it took me a while to get into this show was because Katherine has 13 reasons why stamped all over her still in my head) I do think she handled some of Nimue’s scenes a bit... awkwardly.

Case in point: Her first interaction with Arthur

^But honestly, this wasn’t that horrible when you look to the effects the show used to make this show “graphic”

All the bloody gore they showed was done so badly that I scoffed more than grimaced.

^Also can we just point out that when Nimue strung up that red paladin in vines, they made it seem like it was horrible and prime gore material when in reality it looked like a cheap set piece... what a let down

Now lets chat this up a moment:

We all know how the King Arthur tale goes. He marries Gwenevere who then G cheats with Lancelot (more of him in a moment) etc. I feel for Nimue from the get go when I noticed how quick they were to use her to glow up Arthur... like seriously?

What girl would start a relationship with Mr. Goody (to the point where he is boring) when her life is literally turning to shatters in all directions? All male writers red flag

And while we are on the topic, Arthur-sir, you are the most annoying and basic good guy I’ve watched in some time. Not only does he seem to be too good to the point that its unrealistic, they seriously played off him stealing Nimue’s sword as an okay thing to do... Sir no.

Devon portrays all the characteristics of King Arthur perfectly, but I feel like if Arthur is to progress into becoming a king, we should be seeing him making mistakes and learning so as to become the great ruler he will one day be. (writers take notes please)

We need some dirt in that perfect persona he carries

Also known as Weeping Monk

Good Stuff:

Let me just start by putting this magnificent thirst trap right here:

I’ve got to hand it to Daniel Sharman, he has a very loyal fanbase that seems able to carry THIS ENTIRE SHOW on their shoulders.

Like honestly, I looked through plenty of content on various apps and the Weeping Monk is blowing through social media like wild fire.

And for good reason too:

-he’s an attractive dude playing the gothic misguided character (serious cliche but highly effective)

-he’s one of the few characters with an interesting character arch (so far)

-he’s Lancelot (hello ladies man)

-he’s great with kids *swoon*

-and don’t get me started on that entrance in ep1 (the writers knew what they were doing)

I’m going to write another post at some point to address why I don’t think he is a toxic, manipulative character that just so happens to be romanticized because of looks (as is seen so far). So watch for that if that interests you. Post in Question

But to tie this off, Daniel Sharman is a fantastic actor and I hope we get more of him next season.

And, no, it’s not just because he is visually pleasing to the eye (but god bless guy liner)

I feel like the writers have suspended his meeting with Nimue to the point were we are all shipping the pair of them together, when it’s possible that they may have a different bond, closer to that of Lancelot and the Lady of the Lake in classic lore

But if they hook up I will still be very pleased ngl

Other things I really loved in this show:

-Pym (her time in the viking ship as a healer was prime humor) but I’m pissed she doesn’t end up with the hot viking because unlike our main couple of the show, these two had chemistry for the short scenes they shared together.

-Merlin (The moment I saw Gustaf Skarsgård in the trailer, I started the first ep. I loved him as Floki in Vikings and wanted to see him in other things) I was pissed that the writers made him seem... boring.

-I was happy with how Merlin opened up to us as a father to Nimue. Nimue just needs to get her shit together and learn from him because we all know she’s powerful, she just needs to work on it.

Watch the writers get lazy and just magically having her cast all sorts of powerful magic just because once upon a time she manipulated an apple tree

-SQUIRELL (I loved him from his first scene)

-the Widow! She was the perfect middle ground for a character and her voice was strangely motherly (and I LOVED IT!) While I know Morgana becoming the widow was a great power play and all that, I miss the original widow.

-Morgana’s general storyline was great considering what happens in the lore. I expected her to go evil the moment her sweet love (that poor nun!) came from the dead with burn marks and talked about being powerful. I’m glad they didn’t push that on her so quickly. They should let that storyline fester a bit more. She’s too great a character to turn to the dark yet (unless they pull a complete 180 of the Weeping Monk)

-Awesome baddies- And by that I mean Iris and the head monk that came to a very satisfactory end in ep 10. Also, props to the show for making the Pope a quick to anger tyrant and his second in command being a literal weasel. 10/10 villain act right there. With these villains in play, it’s easy for Weeping Monk fans to see the light in him, thus driving his character arch.

-The Christian themes. This may be surprising to some, especially if you are like me, a christian (I’m catholic). But honestly, I loved how they took snippets of Christian history and flipped it to create a complicated power in this show. By this I mean, the red monks act a lot like the holy orders in Catholicism back during the Crusades and the nuns act as healers and helpers to those that ask for sanctuary (the Abbess kept her mouth shut about Nimue, even when she was at risk) - thats what the core of Christianity is supposed to be, and I’m glad they made religion complicated through the monks and nuns.

-Red Spear/ vikings- cool concept to add vikings to the story and the red spear is a bad ass. I hope we dive further into her storyline next season (I expect so given the rumors I’m hearing about how she is supposedly Gwenevere)- If that’s true, I’m worried the writers are going to ruin the relationship G is supposed to have with Lancelot, solely because both characters are more Alpha energy than Beta, and we all know how that goes...

Maybe that’s why Red Spear’s interaction with Arthur was so great. He screams beta and I’m all for it.

#weeping monk #merlin #review #tv show #king arthur #lancelot #nimue #daniel sharman #katherine langford #cursed netflix

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kangaracha · 3 years

Note

tell me about your ocs tho

you asked for this

so it’s been like, a while, since i really looked at my ocs outside of zombies, and also my work with the most proper ocs for zombies isn’t published yet, so i’m just going to do the three from other fandoms that i have big fics for and if you wanna hear about my little zombies ocs you can ask about em. okay. okay.

this is also really hard cause these characters go through so much change over the course of these fics, and i’m trying not to give away spoilers xD i will try. my best.

the OG. the one and only. the working-through-your-teenage-frustrations character. i love her.

IMOGEN HAYLOCK

mcu - read sparrow

so the thing with imogen is that i wanted to do something different to the other oc fics I’d seen so far in this fandom. which is not to say those fics were bad or anything, i love them, i just want to be different. I was interested in writing a character that was like....not the perfect fit for the avengers, or the girl that got along with everyone, and then i saw TWS and related media (lookin at you, agents of shield), and i was like, ‘okay but if you were just hydra by name and working by shield values and principles all that time, and then suddenly you had to get up and kill your coworkers....’ and imogen Began.

i find her interesting for her wit and dry humour, her sarcasm and her big attitude - but also, her frustration with life, the deep-cut anger that she’s carrying with her like a rock, her struggle with self-worth and the way she presents herself to the world, and her complete average-ness in a place where everyone is exceptional. she’s nothing special - she’s just skating by, actually, she’s a high school dropout and on probation as a shield agent, and she’s really only off the streets because hydra value her as an object that might hold some valuable information related to a twenty year old cold case that doesn’t even have any relevance anymore in the grand scheme of things.

in sparrow, she finds something to relate to in clint barton - avenger, but also human disaster zone, making things up on the fly, most overlooked superhero of the century, completely regular guy with one unusual skill. she has to learn to be open to change and to want to be a good person, instead of an angry, ignorant person who will blindy follow whatever order she’s given and pick fights with anyone that disagrees with her. she also realises a lot of things that she should have realised sooner - that what’s left of her family is toxic as hell, that she’s been blindy following the forces of evil for years, that she doesn’t have to be an angry child from a broken home anymore, and that there’s a whole, scary world out there waiting for her and she can go and find anything she wants.

the rest of the trilogy, flicker and swift, follow her finding her way in the world, figuring out who she’s going to be and what she’s going to do, which is very relatable to me rn. it’s like therapy. flicker is also a great opportunity for me to have a crack at writing a romance as a side plot, and getting to let this character grow and realise her own self-worth and that yes, she can actually love and be loved in lots of different ways, is so satisfying. swift is just the icing on the cake, swift is her coming into her power, in her own way, it’s her looking back and realising that she’s changed her life and that she could do it after all, it’s a satisfying ending, i promise. i’m going to share it with you one day.

the slaughter of the lambs is kind of the sequel to the very first ac game that i always wanted and never got - except it’s not about altair because. i’m ~special~. the fic is set 20 years after the game, in the Levant, and is split into 4 parts spanning most of marwa’s lifetime, starting in 1211 AD and ending in 1257 AD and following her through the golden era of the assassin’s and the brotherhood’s downfall. it’s canon complaint, but runs like....canon adjacent. it’s its own story.

MARWA ABADI

assassin’s creed - read the slaughter of the lambs

marwa begins this story as a novice training in masyaf, the only female assassin in all of the levant. she’s raw and half-trained, never seen combat, her strength and ability put into doubt every day - but she’s talented too, and she works twice as hard as the boys, determined to prove everyone wrong. she’s tough and scrappy because she has to be to survive in the world she’s put herself in, and just a little too self-confident, which leads her to a downfall but also an important learning curve about wit and wisdom and loyalty, and the importance of striking a balance between free will and service to a cause.

the rest of the story follows these themes on through the times of most upheaval in her life, as she struggles with following the creed and the beliefs of the assassin order and playing her role as a soldier for this cause, and with doubt and acting in accordance with her own personal morals and beliefs, which as time goes on and the assassin’s change, she finds do not always align. she has a strong sense of right and wrong and a strong character to back this up, and she strives throughout her life to become wise like her mentors were and to guide the world as best she can towards the right kind of future, as an assassin is supposed to.

i wrote this character to explore the idea of being a servant to a higher order, to being faceless and lost to time and serving your cause knowing that, and how you find peace with giving your life over to that. especially coming from this day and age, when everything is recorded and everyone wants to be remembered for something, i found this interesting to explore. as marwa developed as a character, the other things came; her struggle with blind loyalty and festering doubt and the careful balance that she needs to strike between them, the folly of youth and the wisdom that she gains as she grows older, and the struggle of being a woman living in a male-dominated period of history and dedicating herself to a craft usually reserved for men.

the first thing you need to understand about this fic, and this character, is that this is the therapy fic. this is me working through my own issues, but like also add +10 drama so that it’s interesting. and a romance plot, because i need the practise.

ANGIE SOMMARS

pokemon - read to go beyond your borders

angie’s story is mostly a sword/shield fic, though i borrowed some characters and stuff from diamond/pearl. the timelines are not canon. it’s set the year after the events of sw/sh, in galar. it follows angie through the gym challenge and her own personal conflicts, of which she has a laundry list. the fic finds her freshly arrived in galar from her home region in sinnoh, having run away from her responsibilities and the pressure of them at home looking for some kind of answer to her problems, or reassurance that she’s still good at what she does.

angie’s main conflict centres around her being the champion of the sinnoh league, a talented and experienced pokemon trainer sitting painfully exposed in the public eye. she struggles hugely with the reality of this position, and all the expectations that are put up to the person that holds it - she’s expected to be the strongest trainer in the region, to keep up a positive public image as the figurehead of the pokemon league, to be on the job most days of the year and ready for whatever it might throw at her. there’s always someone pushing her to be better, to present herself the way they think she should - and she’s used to being pushed and to being shaped, but there’s only so far you can bend a person before they will break.

angie is burnt out. she’s been in the public eye since she was five years old and competing in pokemon contests, and she’s far from the perfect princess of the league. her mistakes follow her around like a black cloud, creating controversy every time she reaches a new goal and drawing more and more bad press every time she messes something up. she doesn’t know what her own goals are anymore, and she doesn’t know where to go from the platform she’s found herself stranded on - she’s clinging to a position she’s too afraid to admit she doesn’t want anymore, and she’s scared to fall, or to break, or to look out to different horizons.

angie’s story explores the double-edged sword of fame and fortune, the satisfaction of being the best but also the scrutiny people place you under, the impact of ‘cancel culture’ on an individual, depression and anxiety and the endless circles of guilt in a toxic family environment...but also the hope of finding new horizons and finding the courage to take those first steps into the future that you want. it’s a coming of age kind of story, it’s young people finding their feet and new friends and new dreams and supporting each other through hard times. and it all ends well, which, to me, is the most important thing.

#original characters #ocs #mcu #pokemon swsh #assassins creed #zombiedadthoughts #zombiedadfics #imogen haylock #marwa abadi #angie sommars #sparrow #tgbyb #tsotl

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cr-darksienna · 3 years

Text

hello hello! i’m here to bring you an idol group’s absolutely trash of a leader, rapper and vocal, jeong jaehyuk. he’s a jack of all trades, master of none with a bit of an anger streak and anger issues that he’s been learning over the years to handle. darkly charismatic and with a open history due to a big scandal that he had few months into riot’s debut, hyuk is a performer with a 150% effort and attitude, living like he can burn out in a single day and not live to see the next sunrise tomorrow. incorrigible, possessive and with a slightly petty streak, he’s not one to pull his punches (esp with his members) with anyone that offends him, though he’s been taming himself under bc’s watchful eye until more recently. call him a cesspool of moral filth or a festering pool of toxicity, he’s as deeply insecured behind his antagonistic nature, and has worked ten times as hard for 13 years in his company to get himself to where he kinda is in right now, neither here nor there, halted in his steps by a company that feels he’s not up to it due to his loose handle on emotions and a desperate attempt to quell down on the various scandals that knight has had.

his company has played into the image of the bad boy of the group for him, especially after his first (and only) scandal, and he plans to make the most of it, especially with the reins now loosened on his end. he’s spent quite the time being a tamed tiger, and isn’t going to hesitate upon wreaking havoc once he’s been let loosened.

do hit the like button if you’d like to plot with him, and i’ll pop into your discords / dms! hyuk’s a muse that i prefer brainstorming for instead of having plots ahead of time, so feel free to go ahead and throw anything in his direction when we discuss!

profile / background

about stuff : (tw: abandonment, anger issues, violence)

he says he doesn’t have parents, which is partially true, considering he spent almost all of his life in the foster care system, until he aged out at 18. being bounced around from foster house to foster house in the adoption system didn’t do well for his own personality and view about himself, and he came away with a really bad anger streak and violent tendencies, especially when someone tries to poke him / agitates him.

if he wasn’t an idol, hyuk would have gone on to do some petty crimes, because prior to the age of 13 (when he was casted by bc for his face), he was sliding towards the dark side of the law, running from school, getting into street fights, doing little things that never set a juvenile record, but still wasn’t all that clean either.

he was casted one day when running away from school when he was 13 (his results needless to say were trash), and was offered a contract because of his face. his company was looking for someone with similar vibes to his own, and was willing to train him as long as he remained committed to the trainee path. he took up the offer with the insistence of his then foster mother--the orphanage’s owner, who honestly couldn’t wait to get rid of him, due to all the trouble he made.

so jaehyuk became a trainee just through a scrape of luck--his rapping skills were pretty okay, and so were his vocals, and bc felt as though they could polish him more if he did became a trainee, and so he started 13 years of his trainee life. being a trainee actually directed a lot of his excess energy from his angered self into his personal commitment to master a single thing--and he eventually became known amongst trainees as one of the most competitive, even if he wasn’t the best at what he did.

he was like a blackhole, constantly desperate to learn, and when he learned something, he was equally as desperate to master it, just doing things in the way that he knew how to do--and that was to knock on it until he either punched a hole through and understood it, or the door opened on itself for him. rapping became that particular outlet that he felt he moderately achieved some success with, but it wasn’t enough.

hungry for more he turned his eyes to producing, composing, even took acting classes and variety classes, just to fill that gaping hole of inadequacy that he felt made him out to be just not enough. while he knows he’s not the best, he’s proud of his unique vision for performance, and is pretty insistent about his artistic vision, which he gradually found a talent for.

but well. its not enough. he wanted--no he needed more.

and so when riot came and he became their leader by some crappy stroke of fate, he set what he felt was the lowest boundary for all of their members : respect each other, give your best to all that you do for riot, if not, i will sock you in the face. from the beginning, hyuk was very clear that he wouldn’t be the best leader, because he knew he had more than enough flaws in himself, and even felt that he lacked the qualifications to be one, but since his own fate relied on riot being successful, he expected everyone else in the group to at the very least, treat it with the same respect and effort he does, because one way or another they’re all in this whole thing together.

funny thing is: a few months after their debut and their first scandal (that wasn’t his), he lands himself in hot water for a violence scandal, having punched a male bystander in anger. bc was chagrined enough to put him on notice and probation for a while, and desperate to claim back a bit of a credibility, a press conference was held for him to apologise publically.

hyuk abandoned his pride (for various personal reasons as well) that day and went on his hands and knees in front of the reporters, apologising for his scandal and promising to be a better person. unfortunately, that sealed quite a lot of opportunities for him from his company.

his company felt that he needed to get a better grip on his emotions and anger issues before coming out again to the public in other areas apart from his group, and so he wasn’t able to do any variety or act , or even produce any songs (he still wrote lyrics and produced for his group occasionally, and could still produce his own songs, but those songs he produced wouldn’t be selected for a solo), and so to pacify his company hyuk literally abstained from creating another scandal from himself (though he did still cause a bit of problems in his own group), and held himself back until much recently. apart from that, his company publically disclosed much of his history and background to the public--thus rendering it open knowledge that hyuk was an orphan (abandoned by his mother), and from the foster care system, with a slight history of not going well in school etc.

his image is not particularly clean and bright, instead he’s known for the nitty gritty stuff, of which most of his fans have taken to his bad boy image, liking to imagine him to a particular trope because of his apparently rather cute face.

some plot ideas:

he’s a lone wolf by nature, and so he has little (only 2) friends around him, unless you’re mostly from bc and have trained with him for a set amount and a good period of time. these are the people that know him the best, who sees past that angry battered child inside of him to the blackhole that’s yearning for approval and desperate to make himself feel whole again. they’ve seen his self destructive tendencies, watched him careen over the edge and violently fall, do things that he knows clearly isn’t good for him and then suffer the repercussions all over again. ( note: cannot be from his group..he probably doesn’t have a good relationship with most of the riot members)

exes, flings, fwbs : god, he has so many. none of them are consistent, and none of them last between a month to two months really. he simply treats them as if there’s no option of anything further beyond just the wrestle of bodies in bedsheets, and the fierce scratch of his nails against their backs. more often than not, its not him that gets hurt, because he has the tendency to leave before anything further happens. has he fallen for any of them before? probably not. only one, really. don’t get your hopes up, he tells them with a cigarette dangling from his lips and puffs of smoke in the air. because he’s just nothing but the biggest jerk when it comes to feelings and relationships.

the bad influence: he does a lot of vices, from smoking to drinking, to just..a lot of things that most people won’t attempt to try, chasing after that fleeting moment of a thrill and desire. perhaps you’re looking for a kindred spirit who likes the thrill of danger as you do, or you’d like him to spoil you for the worse things in life, open a door to destroy and ruin you completely just like he feels that he’s done to himself.

rivals: ...yeah i don’t think i need to say more, because he’s someone that rises up to the challenge so fully and completely its almost as if he’s itching to have a fight or a challenge. perhaps he’s punched you before, or you differ in your philosophies and values, one way or another, it’s hyuk’s fault that he’s offended you, and you’re both just going to go down because of it.

connection:

the girl he’s in love with (possibly his endgame ; arnd 26 yrs old?) : an idol from a group as well, she’s one of his few closest friends, and he’s known her for around 13 years. they have a on & off friends with benefits thing, with him meeting her after she left his company for 10 years. he’s the one she always gravitates to back again, and they’re equally, broken, twisted and carnal--that’s why they’re perfect for each other, since they’re the only ones that can take and survive each other.

#//: ooc : bleh bleh bleh bleh :d

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dreamcatcherfication · 4 years

Text

Three’s a Crowd

I hope this fic isn’t absolute trash after the short break from writing I took. In the span of three days I completely forgot how to write and it shows.

But anyway, hello everyone! Anon requested Jane getting jealous because of Aragon being maternal towards Kat, and I loved that prompt. I’m not sure I did it justice, but we’re certainly trying. I really hope this fic is in any sense coherent. Sorry for any spelling/grammatical errors, I forgot how to write and my english is not good now.

And also - I DO NOT CONDONE ANY OF THIS BEHAVIOR! A lot of what happens in this fic includes toxic mindsets and sometimes toxic behavior, and I do not support that in any way. I wanted to do my best to represent how toxic mindsets can affect a person, and how hard it can be to get out of them. That’s why Jane might seem a little OOC, but I did my best to balance everything out.

Writing Masterpost

If you want to send a request or a prompt, my inbox is always open! I publish a story at 8:00 AM PST everyday, so I’m always in need of new ideas. If you want to be tagged in my works, just let me know and I’ll be sure to tag you!

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Trigger Warnings: Toxic behavior, toxic mindsets

Jane Seymour didn’t like being busy. Of course she liked to have things to do so she wasn’t wasting time, but being overburdened with work stressed her out far more than she liked. For the past week Jane had been overwhelmed with learning new choreography for the show, and the costume changes, as well as some of her lines being workshopped. It took all of her attention, and Jane started to notice how much less time she was spending with the queens.

There was one particular change in dynamics that Jane was starting to notice. Ever since the queens had grown comfortable with each other, Kat and Jane were almost always by each other’s side. It made sense, with Jane longing for someone to act maternal towards, and Kat lacking any strong maternal figure in her life. The two of them clicked, forming a bond that they both so desperately needed.

But now, Kat was hardly ever around Jane. She wasn’t avoiding Jane, that much was clear, but the teen always seemed busy with someone else. Namely, Catherine of Aragon. It irked Jane to see the two of them so happy together. Internally, she kept telling herself she held no ill will towards Catherine, but she couldn’t help the small seed of rage that festered in her heart every time she saw the two queens together.

Just yesterday, Jane had asked Kat if she wanted to read together. “Sorry Jane, I’m going to the movies with Aragon. She got us these great seats and it’s one of those new, high tech theatres. She’s so cool,” Kat had gushed on.

Jane had to keep repeating that Aragon wasn’t being mean and was perfectly capable and welcome to spend time with Kat. However, in the back of Jane’s mind, she kept thinking Catherine unfit to spend time with Kat. “It’s a toxic mindset,” Jane kept telling herself, trying to push it away.

She started out small, doing little things to regain Kat’s attention. Late at night, Jane had gone to the store to buy a giant box of guylian’s chocolates, Kat’s favorite. The next morning, she left them on the kitchen counter with the note, For Kat, the ten amongst these threes. From Jane.

When Kat walked down the stairs and into the kitchen, Jane held her breath in anticipation. Kat’s eyes drifted over to the chocolates as she frowned in confusion. She made her way over to the box and read the note. Eyes lighting up, Kat turned to Jane with an open mouth. “For me?” she gasped.

Nodding her head, Jane tried to conceal the smile growing on her lips. “Just for you Kat.”

“Oh thank you so much!” Kat hugged Jane tightly to her chest. “Can I have some now?”

Pretending to look around like she was keeping a secret, Jane put a finger to her lips. “Only if you don’t tell the others.”

Kat laughed and waved Jane off. “As if. These are all mine. Thank you Jane, I love you!”

For the first time in a week, Jane’s heart unclenched and she relaxed. Kat still loved her, that was good. That was very good.

The next day, Jane woke up bright and early so that she could be ready to greet Kat when she came down for breakfast. Behold her surprise when Kat was already up and about, fully dressed and wide awake. “Kat, why are you up so early?” Jane asked, still fighting back slight drowsiness. “It’s only 6:30.”

Pulling on a jacket, Kat shrugged. “Aragon’s taking me to this moving carnival that’s set up downtown. She heard about it through Maria and she wanted to take me.”

Like she heard her name, Aragon appeared from the kitchen. She had paper bags filled with food that she was packing into a travel bag. “That’s right, Kat,” she rubbed the girl’s shoulder. “Maria and the other ladies went yesterday and they loved it, so I thought I’d take Kat out for the day.”

“Oh,” Jane’s heart broke a little bit. “That’s nice.”

Aragon flashed her a grin and led Kat to the door. “We’ll be back for dinner Jane, don’t worry.”

Kat waved as they left the room. “Yeah, we’ll tell you all about it!”

The door shut on Jane, her hand half raised in a pitiful goodbye wave. “Bye,” she whispered, her shoulders slouching. She should’ve known it wouldn’t last. Kat wasn’t bound to her, she had her own relationships. That didn’t mean it hurt any less to see her bounding off with Aragon. Was she being replaced? Jane questioned. Had Kat found someone better when Jane wasn’t around and realized she didn’t want her?

Sensibility told Jane it was only insecurity, but she still couldn’t shake it off. If Kat only wanted to spend time with Aragon, how would Jane cope? Would she lose the bond she so desperately tried to build with Kat in the first place?

Setting her face, Jane vowed that she wouldn’t let Aragon destroy her and Kat’s bond. They had something none of the other queens had, and Jane wasn’t about to let that go. The battle was on.

“Hey, Kat,” Jane approached the girl a couple days later.

The teen was on her phone, scrolling through pictures she and Aragon had taken at the carnival. “Hmm?” Kat glanced up, her face brightening when she saw Jane. “Hi Jane.” Before Jane could start talking, Kat cut her off and shoved the phone in her face. “Look at this video I took from the carnival. This guy eats fire and then breaths it out. Isn’t it cool,” she explained.

Watching the video silently, Jane wasn’t paying attention to the guy eating fire. She was listening to the faint dialogue between Kat and Aragon from behind the camera. “How does he do that?” she heard Kat ask.

“A magician never reveals his secrets,” Aragon replied lightly, “and it’s more fun to watch and be amazed.”

Judging by Kat’s gasp, she had agreed. “It would be so cool to be able to do that.”

The camera shook slightly as Aragon came into frame, her eyes twinkling. “Don’t go hurting yourself trying to swallow fire, Kitty, this guy’s a professional.”

Kat’s pout was practically visible through her voice. “Do you really think I would hurt myself trying to eat fire?”

Shrugging goodnaturedly, Aragon leaned back out of frame. “I think you listen to your cousin too much sometimes. I’m not saying that I don’t trust you, but I am saying it’s not unlike you and Anne to try and eat fire because it looks cool.”

The video ended along with Jane’s good mood. How could Kat be so enraptured by Aragon? She and Jane had those conversations millions of times, why would she be having it with Aragon now? “Forget about that,” Jane tried to cover her annoyance with giddiness, “Because I’ve got something better planned.”

Raising her eyebrow in interest, Kat leaned forward. “What could be better than someone eating fire?”

“I dunno…” Jane teased Kat, “maybe the private animal shelter will suffice?”

Practically jumping to her feet, Kat dropped her phone, completely forgetting about the video. “No way! But you have to make appointments with them, Anna and I have been trying for months, how -”

Jane cut her off. “I pulled a couple strings, don’t worry about it. I know how much you wanted to see them, so it’s all worth it.”

“When do we get to go?” Kat prodded, bouncing on her feet.

Jane’s heart sped up when she saw the pure happiness in Kat’s eyes. “As soon as you’re ready.”

The animal shelter itself was huge, although there weren’t many people throughout. It was a private shelter and the owners required a considerable ‘donation’ for patrons to be allowed to come play with the animals even if they weren’t interested in buying. It was a lot of money Jane was required to pay, but she would do it a thousand times over in order to keep Kat happy.

Kat was fawning over the dogs as Jane stood behind her. There was a small, fluffy white dog that kept jumping into Kat’s lap and attacking her with its tongue. A bunch of other dogs swarmed her feet, causing Kat to giggle. Restraining herself from sneezing, Jane couldn’t help the swell of accomplishment in her chest. Kat loved it, and that’s what mattered.

The fur that was gathering around Jane irritated her skin, turning it red, but she ignored her discomfort. Jane didn’t care about her allergy to dogs and to fur, and she would continue to hide it from Kat. The teen was so happy with Jane, she wouldn’t ruin it. “Jane,” Kat called her attention. “Isn’t she so cute,” Kat held up the white dog to Jane, prompting her to pet it. Carefully stroking the dog’s fur, Jane prayed that a sneezing fit wouldn’t overcome her.

“She’s lovely, dear,” Jane agreed, stepping away from the dog as soon as Kat was satisfied.

Setting the dog down, Kat pulled Jane into a hug. Melting into the teen’s embrace, Jane couldn’t help a sigh of relief. This was all she wanted. “Thank you Jane,” Kat murmured. “I love you.”

That’s all Jane needed to hear, once again. The only thing she wanted out of any of this. So Jane contented herself to watch as Kat sat back on the ground and returned her attention to the dogs.

By now, Jane was sure she had won. How could Aragon compete when Jane had taken Kat to an exclusive animal shelter to play with the dogs she loved so much? At this rate, all of Jane’s worries would be for naught and Kat would always love her. All of this would fade into a little bubble in the past and things would be back how they should be.

That was until Jane heard talking coming from Kat’s room. Immediately standing up, Jane went to investigate. Chances were it was only Anne talking with her cousin, but Jane still had to know if there was something she was missing. Opening Kat’s door, Jane carefully peeked in to see what was going on.

In the center of the room stood Aragon, a small crate of stuffed animals in her hands. Kat was standing in front of her, sorting through the stuffed animals with wide eyes. “There’s so many,” Kat glanced up at Aragon, “how much did this cost?”

“Money’s not important. You were telling me about how much you loved the dogs at the shelter Jane took you to, so I knew you’d like these too. Think of it as a way to have them with you all the time.” Aragon spoke softly, her hand carefully brushing some hair away from Kat’s face.

A pit grew in Jane’s stomach. That was something she did with Kat. Not something Aragon did, something Jane did. It was her special thing, why -

Jane had to cut herself off. She kept berating herself internally for getting so caught up with this. All the queens were close, it wasn’t against any rules for Aragon to care for Kat. Aragon wasn’t a bad person, Jane knew that. But she kept wanting to believe that she was better than Aragon, and that she should be the one giving Kat gifts. This… this wasn’t the status quo.

Tuning back in, Jane watched as Kat took the crate from Aragon’s arms and beamed as wide as her face would allow. “I love them Catherine, I love you.”

And that was the last straw for Jane.

The next day, Jane had a surprise for Kat. If this didn’t win her over for good, she didn’t know what would. Aragon and Kat had gone out together for lunch, and the other queens were off doing who-knows-what. Jane was prepared, and she would wait in front of the door for as long as it took for Kat to show up.

Silently, Jane stared at the door. She knew she shouldn’t be doing this, she knew it was wrong. But knowing you have a problem and being able to fix it are two different things. The only way she knew to get rid of this deep ache in her chest was to win. To win Kat’s affection, to win her attention, and to win her love. This girl was like her daughter, and she wasn’t going to let Aragon take that from her.

The door opened, bringing with it lively conversation. “Nando’s never fails,” Aragon laughed, herding Kat into the room. “But you shouldn’t order so much if you aren’t going to eat it.”

“Oh come on,” Kat rolled her eyes, “how else are we going to get leftovers for days? I’ve picked up on a life hack or two, you know.” Kat stopped speaking when she noticed Jane watching her. “Hey Jane,” she waved. Aragon and Kat stood in confusion at Jane’s still figure.

“Is everything alright?” Aragon was slightly put off by the other queen’s iciness.

“Yes, just fine,” Jane replied. “I have something for you Kat.”

Warily, Kat approached Jane and sat down next to her. There was something clearly wrong with Jane, and Kat was quite aware of it. “What is it?” she asked.

Reaching under her legs, Jane pulled out a small cage. She opened it, and out popped the small white dog Kat had been playing with at the shelter. Kat and Aragon gasped, both surprised at the furry creature’s appearance. “Jane... I…” Kat was unsure what to say.

“I got her for you, I know how much you loved playing with her,” Jane encouraged Kat to take the dog. Nervously, Kat obliged, picking up the animal.

Aragon frowned and made her way over to Jane. “It’s a sweet gesture and all, but Jane, you know we don’t have any way to support a dog right? We’re going to have to return her.”

“Yeah, and as much as I love her, wasn’t she already adopted by another family?” Kat recalled.

Batting off the concern, Jane inched away from the dog, her skin already turning red. “Nothing a little payment couldn’t fix. Besides, you liked her, so it was worth it.”

Still, Aragon was unconvinced. “Jane, just because Kat likes the dog doesn’t mean it’s a good idea to buy it.”

Standing up, Jane snarled, “Just because Kat likes animals doesn’t mean you have to buy her a crate full of them.” She then recoiled, realizing what her voice sounded like. “I - I.”

“Stop it!” Kat set the dog down and stepped away from Jane and Aragon. “Why are you fighting?”

“We’re not fighting,” Aragon assured Kat, taking a step towards her.

Scoffing, Kat moved away from them. “Maybe it doesn’t seem like it, but I’ve noticed. As soon as one of you does something nice, the other has to one up them. I don’t need all these gifts.”

“But you want them,” Jane added hopefully.

Shaking her head, Kat crossed her arms. “I want to spend time with you. Both of you. Together, if that’s even possible. You two have been at odds for the past week and I’m sick of it. I’ve tried to ignore it and enjoy the good things, but I can’t anymore. Why is it so hard to accept that I want to spend time with both of you?”

“Because I was here first?” Jane offered. “You’ve always wanted to spend time with me, Kat.”

Aragon tried to put herself in front of Jane. “Because I’m here when she isn't. Why keep going back to Jane when I’m always here for you.”

Biting her lip, Kat couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Do you two even listen to yourselves? This is so stupid. I don’t want you fighting over me.” Moving to round the couch and make a clean getaway to the stairs, Kat shot the two of them a disappointed glare. “I can’t spend time with either of you, not like this.”

“Kat!” Jane called her before the girl could disappear. “Aren’t you supposed to say you love me?” It was something she had become so used to hearing Kat say to her at the end of every conversation.

Shaking her head once more, Kat turned away. “I’m not sure I can say that truthfully right now.” Then she was gone, the closing over her bedroom door echoing throughout the house a moment later.

Jane turned to Aragon and they both glared at each other. “You’ve been doing it too, huh,” Jane broached, her voice defensive.

“I’ve only been trying to make sure she knows I care about her,” Aragon argued, crossing her arms.

“No,” Jane accused, “You’ve been using her to satisfy your own need to be a mother.”

“Well you’ve been doing it for longer than I have.”

Clicking her tongue, Jane sat down on the couch next to the dog. “Maybe I have. But I can’t stop. It’s the best feeling in the world, like a - like a -”

“Like a drug,” Aragon filled in. “I know.” She gave up and sat next to Jane. “You know what it’s like when Kat smiles at you better than anyone. And once she started looking at me that way…”

“You couldn’t let it go,” Jane added on. “I know,” she swallowed, “I know you aren’t a bad influence. I’m sorry I’ve been treating you like one. I don’t know how to get used to Kat seeing someone else the same way she sees me. Kat’s like my daughter.”

Aragon nodded, leaving the two queens in silence. “It might be a little weird at first,” Aragon broke the quiet air, “But we could try, maybe, spending time with Kat together? Like she said, it doesn’t have to be one or the other.”

Some defiant part of Jane still wanted to resist. She wanted to be the only one, she wanted things to be the way they were before Aragon entered the picture. But for once, Jane took a step towards fixing her mindset. “Let’s do it. If it’ll make things better, then let’s do it.”

In a moment of awkwardness, the two queens stared at each other, unsure of what to do next. Aragon stuck out her hand, hoping for Jane to seal the deal. Jane took the hand and the two of them shook on their agreement.

---------------------------------------------

Tag List:

@radcowboyalmondtree @boleynhowards @annabanana2401 @babeebobo @dont-lose-your-queerhead @everything-insanity @mindless-pidgeon @i-wanna-dance-and-sing-six @thedemidisaster @its-totes-gods-will @thatbolxyngirl @thenameisnoone @sixqueendom

#six the musical fanfiction #six the musical fanfic #six the musical fic #six fanfiction #six fanfic #sixfic #jane seymour #katherine howard #catherine of aragon #tw: toxic mindsets #tw:toxic behavior #i tried to do this as respectfully and accurately as possible #i don't know how well it turned out #hopefully not super terrible #i just realized how much i hate resolving things #i always keep my endings open ended #which probably annoys the hell out of you guys #but that's my thing so #i guess you'll have to roll with it

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koorinohebi · 3 years

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6, 30, & 38 !

@ramenthings

Munday Asks - Open and accepting

6. is there any other muse in this fandom you’d like to RP?

Oh wow, do I ever.

I actually have other characters in the fandom that I RP like Nohara Rin (who I have to get posts done for.), but there's probably 2 characters whom I want to try RPing again, try to see if I can do them justice. Back then, when I picked them up, there were very little information to be had so I had to go with what we know and see of them from both anime and manga. That time, back in the early 20's, I dont believe canon-divergence was a very common thing because the moment you stray away from the meta, you're automatically persecuted for being out of character even when you technically arent. RPing these days is great because you have more liberty to take your character where you want them to go based on your headcanons and interpretations without them being less of who they are. Because people are more understanding that a difference in interpretation doesnt necessarily make the character OOC (unless it's really apparent that they are. And people can tell.)

So going back, these two characters are-- well, I guess you could say they are actually three:

Pein, Nagato, and Konan.

I had the chance to RP both Pein and Konan back when forum RPing is a thing. Nagato wasn't a thing then so we just knew Pein as this orange haired Akatsuki leader who was out there trying to gather all the Bijuu. Because there was so little to go by, I really feel like I didnt do either of them justice so I hope to be able to play them again some day, albeit after more research. But first and foremost, I want to try and RP Nagato because I do find his character interesting. I like the way he interpreted how the concept of pain makes a person grow, and how he sacrificed everything for that ideal, and ultimately in order to protect those who meant the world to him...which eventually branched out to the citizens of Amegakure.

Lol, apparently I also like characters who carry deep trauma and who gets lost along the way, so there's that aspect.

30. what are your favorite RP tropes to play? (angst, hurt-comfort, etc…)

Angst is definitely at the top here. In my private roleplays with friends, as well as in my fanfic writing, I do give Kiomi a lot of angst...mostly because my main interpretation for her which follows the anime/manga timeline deals with her having A LOT of regret. Having ran away from herself, deciding to let cowardice fester in her heart, she's stuck in a limbo and can't move forward. So she does a lot of things to try and recompense thinking that it'll bring her peace, but it doesnt. She can't let go of the past, she cant forgive herself, and so she ends up pretending that she's alright with how things turned out. Lies however can only go so far. Which is why, which is why, which is why, I do enjoy my current dynamic for her in terms of her interaction with Kashin Koji. (I'll definitely write a drabble at some point.) Because he helps her make sense of herself. Life lessons part two at the hands of someone a little more unforgiving. She has a hard time lying to him because he calls her bluff and bullies challenges her to quit being such a wuss. I really do hate the fact that this girl often gets bullied into action, but I found her morale is boosted when she's rallied to a cause by a rival or someone who thinks rather little of her. Because she's a pretty sore loser at the core, so she ends up working her butt off to prove them wrong. In this case, she doesnt want Kashin Koji’s approval, she just wants him off her back.

I also like fluff, but it's very hard to RP that with Kiomi because she's so... eh with her emotions when it comes to people. Which is where the slow burn tropes come in. I enjoy building relationships for Kiomi so that everything feels more organic for her. Almost everything with her starts with a lie, and eventually, depending on how things pan out, becomes a truth. It also gives me more drama to work with when she realizes she's grown attach to someone. I do enjoy it when she learns about her own feelings, how that side of her that got buried with her family comes rushing out the surface. Because despite everything, she's a pretty good girl. Just raised in less forgiving circumstances that doesn't afford her the luxury to be kind all the time.

Frenemy tropes. As much as I love giving Kiomi good friends who she share intimate, almost familial bonds with... I really like toxic friendships that starts from being enemies to eventually being comrades with mutual benefits (nothing sexual, she's gonna run). Like for example, how her odd, normally one-sided rivalry with Sasuke turned out to them becoming friends somewhere in Boruto's generation. I say friend, but she has never ever given up on her quest to defeat him (which she hasnt been able to accomplish at all), but at least it's evolved to "I'll beat you up one day!" from, "I'll kill you!". They're at a level of comfort where Kiomi can jab a sarcastic joke at Sasuke and she doesnt end up getting barbecued by him. I'm 100% certain he thinks she's a nuisance, but at least one whom he can sort of leave his back to. (Of course, Sasukes whom I do not know do not need to share this interpretation if we do interact, unless they too agree to it. But one thing is always constant with Kiomi, and that she will always have hate and envy for him because of being Orochimaru's favorite.)

Top of my head these three are my favorite tropes.

38. what’s the best inspiration for your muse?

Jiraiya and his teachings inspired her so much the real her got dragged out.

Kidding aside, this is a good question. She doesn't really find a lot of things to be too inspiring, but if ever one existed, then it's probably anger and fear. The self loathing she feels for not being good enough inspires her to do better so that she'd be good enough to be someone's first choice. Because ultimately, she just wants to be useful in order to feel like she earned her place within her lord's ranks. And at the start of her adventure, because she owes Orochimaru her life, all she really wanted was to be the perfect shinobi tool that’d serve as his sword and shield no matter the circumstance. Alas, not so.

The fear of having to go through the things she experienced as a child inspires her to grow stronger so that she'll never have to go through it again (but she does). She dislikes loss, that's why if Kiomi can help it, she wont form too many attachments that can hinder her judgement (but she ended up gaining them anyway). She believes that being an emotionless tool is the best course of action (but she still has so many emotions that she cant keep under wraps). This girl has quite a bit of contradiction, which is fun to play out because it leads to her true personality showing, the one at least, that's not always shrouded in lies.

#|| Breaking the Ice || Answered #ramenthings #Thanks for sending this in. This was fun.

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quinncess · 3 years

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@fearmxnger | JUST TWO COMPLETELY ETHICAL ARKHAM DOCTORS

her hair is slicked back in a tight no-nonense bun, white coat crisp and buttoned up to the top. to look the part of a real professional as her heels click down the hallway towards dr. crane’s office. see, HARLEEN’S EGO TOOK A HIT this morning during a rather uncomfortable staff meeting, in which her credentials and ability to treat the joker were questioned, and certain offhand comments were made by arkham colleagues. as much as the good doctor would have everyone believe that she has a thick skin and can take the criticism, it’s been eating at her all day. festering into something of a TOXIC SPITE that has her wanting to prove every last one of those disrespectful bozo’s wrong. by writing a ground breaking paper about how she cured the clown prince of crime, or seeing her superiors’ patients relapse into madness and their methods fail miserably. anyway, given that one of her more revered colleagues, jonathan, seems to have had some unprecedented success with difficult patients during his time here, she’s decided that he will be her mentor. whether he asked for this role or not.

❛ jonathan? ❜ she taps on his office door and gives him a moment, before letting herself in. one thing she’s learned over her short residency at arkham is that if she wants something, she’ll need take it. no one is giving out freebies here, whether it be training, supplies, or respect, IT ISN’T IN THE BUDGET. ❛ i hope i’m not interrupting anything. do you have a few minutes? ❜ she puts on a pretty smile, and invites herself into an empty seat across from his desk. ❛ i don’t think i’ve had the opportunity to tell you this until now, but i’m a huge fan of your research and work. ❜

#fearmxnger #;t #╳┊♔♥ v; madness in the urban cesspool ( arkham. )#/SOOO EXCITED FOR THIS >:D

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snowxs-blog · 5 years

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Misunderstood Whispers

Summary: It didn’t take Sherlock Holmes to figure out the two of you felt a certain way towards each other, but misunderstandings can lead to taking the longer, more painful path to happiness.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 5k

Warnings: Feels and Fluff

To be stuck in your mind with only the worst of thoughts to keep you company with their whispers in your ear was a torturous punishment. Punishment by whom? Now that was still undecided. HYDRA is an immediate answer. Being subject to their endless experiments and corruption led him to become a slave to them both mentally and physically. Emotionally wasn't an option as they stripped him of that part of his humanity. When he escaped, the consistent plaguing of toxic thoughts was almost as if they were reminding him that, no matter what physical freedom he might have, he was still inevitably caged by their chains.

Another reasonable hypothesis, at least to him, was just simply that the universe didn't deem him worthy to be without those demonic taunts. Perhaps the fates – be there any – already passed judgment on him earlier than the normal human soul and ruled him to be damned to the ninth ring of hell embodied in his mind, created specifically for him to pay for the unforgivable sins that leave him to share the same forever stained red hands of Macbeth. Premature judgment was appropriate on the grounds that he hardly felt like he was human and a part of him did die back in that facility.

But there was always that something – someone – that pulled Bucky back though, just when he feels himself on the brink of slipping off the rocky ledge he clung onto, the dark pit awaiting him from below tempting him to just let go and allow himself to be swallowed whole. She always somehow became a foothold for him, a means of support to boost him up and further away from the abyss. He was cold to her at first, not helping to provide her with reference to his previous code name. He didn’t want anyone getting close. He would only hurt them in more ways than one and no one should bear the emotional burden that was James Buchanan Barnes. But none of that stopped her. Not from approaching him, not from talking to him, not from becoming close to the Winter Soldier himself. And unknown to her, it didn’t stop her from working her way into his sealed-off heart.

The fall was slow but no less hard. He couldn’t even remember when he started to take notice to the small glow that her hair gave off in the sunlight, or the way her eyes squinted a certain way when she laughed, or the small freckles that dotted her arms and face in certain patterns that allowed Bucky to see constellations on her skin. Everything about her came to infatuate him to the point where he couldn’t imagine going about his day without her crossing his mind. He became an addict and she was the drug that numbed his pain and sorrows.

It was all left unsaid to her, though. He would never place himself on her shoulders and expose her to danger like that, even with her arguments against him being a problem. She meant too much to him and he was far too damaged. She deserves someone who was stable. Someone who didn’t attract accusing glares or feared looks by simply crossing the street, who could lend a hand that wasn’t manufactured for the purpose of causing harm, someone who can hold her up just as she held him. The only person who knew - at least, that he knew who knew as the prolonged affectionate gazes that were left on her were not unnoticed by others - was his life-long friend Steve Rogers. If it hadn’t been for the blonde to approach him about his feelings, Bucky doesn’t even know if he would have ever confided in him as he tried his best to will those feelings away. The ex-assassin couldn’t even form a proper denial before Steve chuckled and went mom-mode. Of course, Barnes had no trouble refuting everything that his friend assured him with. He wouldn’t risk it; his mind was made up.

Every interaction (y/n) had with Bucky Barnes was filled with admiration and fondness, especially on her end and she was painfully aware of this fact. In the light she saw him in, she had a hard time even thinking about going about it any other way. She was well aware of how he thought of himself and the things he had done - the lives he had taken under the influence of terrorists. Her own hands weren't that red, but as an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D, they were stained their own shade. But she knew the man he truly was. She knew that James Buchanan Barnes was kind-hearted and selfless, that he would do anything and go through everything for his friends and family. She had no fears of him causing any pain towards her and would endure any danger that came with being close to him. It wasn’t as if she wasn’t a target herself considering her line of work. Most of all, (y/n) knew she was in love with him.

Those feelings ate at her far longer than she would like. He was constantly on her mind as much as she was on his, but she harbored her own doubts. There wasn’t any way he saw her more than a close friend, was there? To her, their shared moments meant everything just as he did and she wanted to give him the world. He deserved the world, even if he didn’t believe that himself. Regardless of her negative thoughts, she attempted dropping hints. She was constantly trying to throw flirty comments into conversations, she would drag him along for coffee, if they touched, she managed to control her racing heart to linger a bit longer, but he gave no indication that he picked up on any of it.

It was on a cooler day that everything became far too overwhelming for her. The summer was melting into a nice fall and the air had taken up a breeze to prepare. Some time between finishing a cup of coffee in the kitchen and heading to her room she had found herself in Steve’s space instead. He was someone she easily confided in as she grew to be close to him as he was Bucky’s best friend. She poured her heart out to him one night after not being able to sleep due to endless thoughts and doubts about her affections for the brunette kept her mind racing. He consoled her, but not without a small knowing smile pulling at his lips. Now she was back to that stage, needing to talk to someone about her urge to just outright confess but her inability to properly do so that was holding her back.

“Say it to me as if I were him,” The captain suggested. It caught her slightly off guard as they had just gone with a few moments of silence as she sank into her thoughts. She turned her head to him, furrowing her eyebrows in confusion.

“What?”

“Just...practice on me. Pretend that I’m Bucky.” He explained. She paused for a moment, scanning his face to catch any sign that he was kidding. He wasn’t. She let out a small laugh as if she couldn’t take him seriously.

“This is ridiculous. I think I’m just going to drown myself in ice cream and live in a hole of despair instead,” She said, shaking her head while throwing her hands up in defeat.

“Hey there, doll.” He said with a small smile. It was clear his intention was to imitate his friend. The drawl was similar to the one Bucky took up whenever he called her that, but it wasn't the same. Nobody could call her Doll and get the same heart-racing, cheeks flushed reaction as he could.

"Uhhh...ugh fine. This isn’t weird at all” She gave in, turning and facing him in full, not without an eye roll. “Hey...Bucky. I wanted...I just want to tell you…”

“Yes?” Steve urged, leaning forward the slightest bit. With a final sigh, she closed her eyes and let herself imagine that it was Bucky that was standing in front of her, not Steve. She mustered up some courage and let herself spill out the words she has so desperately wanted to tell him.

“I...like you. Like, really like you. I have for quite a while I just, I didn’t know how to tell you or I was scared to tell you. Probably both. Every time I see you my heart, it feels as if it’s going to implode but it feels so much worse when you’re not around. I want to be there for you and to hold your hand and I want to tell you that I love you.”

“I love you too, (y/n)”

“What?!” Her eyes snapped open at those words, and she stared up wildly up at Rogers, obvious confusion painting her face in a frenzy.

“That’s Bucky’s line. See? That wasn’t so hard. I bet you feel better.” He said, smiling warmly down at the girl. She let out a small breath. I wouldn’t be so hopeful.

“Yeah. I-I guess I do.” She nodded.

“And you’ll feel even better when you say it to Buck,” Steve said. Just the thought had anxiety crawling back up her throat, but she swallowed it down. She had to tell him. Even if he didn’t tell her what she herself hoped to hear.

“Thank you, Steve.” She smiled in appreciation before heading for the door.

“And (y/n)?” He called causing the woman looked back over her shoulder at him. “He really does like you.” with a final halfhearted smile, she disappeared around the corner.

James Buchanan Barnes was anything but a hero and he knew that. And he knew you deserved better, but he still couldn’t help that small bit of hope that festered in the depths of his core that there was still a possibility that you could give him even a chance. But, upon hearing your confession to Steve - his best friend Steve - that hope went out like a candle. No, that was too gentle. What he felt in his heart, that was anything but gentle. He out of everyone knew what true physical pain was and he thought he knew emotional pain too after the events of his not-so-pretty reunion with Steve, but he was clearly just proved wrong. This - learning that the person you were so in love with was in love with your practically brother and his feelings were reciprocated - was true, heart-crushing pain.

He went days without being able to face either of you. Once he accepted that he had, in fact, heard right, he was angry. And not the dry angry where he could destroy anything in his path, but it was wet and so filled with emotion. The type where you would punch a wall and break down into tears until there were no more left to fall. Not that it’s exactly what he did, but that’s exactly what he did for two days. Or was it three? He lost track. He was angry at Steve for leading him to believe that he would help with his situation, going as far as confronting the soldier about his obvious feelings, he was angry at the universe for once again tearing him down after he - you - had repaired some of the damage left by HYDRA, but, most of all, he was angry at himself for letting that sliver of hope be a thing. Angry for expecting anything else. He let his walls crumble for you, and look where he was left lying?

Slowly that anger began to dissipate. He let himself wander so deep into his thoughts that he realized that he had to either accept the circumstances, or loose the two most important people in his life and, no matter how much seeing you two together would hurt, he couldn’t go on without you. He decided that seeing you happy was all that mattered and all he needed, as long as you were still there with him as just a friend. Perhaps over time he would be able to move on, though he highly doubted it.

He decided that the first step was to begin the acceptance and that’s how he found himself in front of the closed conference room door. Through the window next to it, Steve could be seen sitting in one of the cushioned seats reading over some sort of paperwork splayed out from a manilla folder. He raised his fist, preparing to knock, but hesitated. Was he actually okay with this? Could he handle it? You don’t have a choice, Barnes. He refused to let himself back out, gently rapping at the door before he could spare one more thought. After a few agonizing moments, the blonde granted him admittance.

When he looked at Steve for the first time, he saw flashes of what seemed to be memories, but he knew they didn’t happen...yet. He saw Steve taking you out for your first date. Maybe he took you to that corner coffee shop you always went on about, or maybe a walk around central park with the knowledge that the fall air always cleared your head. He saw you two cuddled up on the couch having one of your notorious movie marathons, the popcorn sitting over your laps. Maybe you had decided to show Steve Jurassic Park finally. He saw you two walk into one of Tony’s fancy Gala’s arm and arm, a beautiful (f/c) dress hugging your figure. That color always looked so nice on you. He clenched his eyes shut, halting the images before they could go any farther. He didn’t need this, not right now.

“Do you need something, Buck?” Steve asked. He was genuinely confused as if he hadn’t a clue why his friend was so distraught. As if he didn’t pour his heart out to him about the same girl he currently was in a relationship with. He curled his metallic fingers, willing the courage to push words out of his mouth.

“I just-” He paused, licking his lips and swallowing deeply. “I just want to make sure that you know that I’m...happy for the two of you.”

Steve’s eyebrows pinched together as he watched his friend, the papers curling limply over his hand as his attention was solely diverted to the struggling soldier at the front of the room. The silence clearly made him uncomfortable as the lack of words from his friend made him continue.

“You both deserve each other and...and I’m not going to hold anything against you or change our friendship or…” Bucky trailed off. This was proving to be harder than he thought.

“What?” Steve’s question had the brunette finally look at him in the eye. There was no doubt that he was confused and Bucky didn’t know why. What else would he be talking about?

“You and (y/n)...” He was hoping that was enough to clarify. He really wanted to go into as little detail as possible, at least right now. Maybe in the future they could talk about it more. He’s going to have to be okay with talking about it more. He had no idea how he was going to get to that point, but he would get there. Anything to see you smile, even if it wasn’t at him.

Steve discarded of whatever he was looking at, dropping the paper in his hand on the table, leaving it forgotten as all his confusion and attention was focused on trying to figure out what his friend could possibly be going on about. Was this why he had been off lately? Locking himself away in his room or the training area while him and you worried sick without a way to get to him? “Bucky…what?”

This had to be some cruel joke. What else could he be talking about? Maybe you and Steve wanted to keep this on the down-low and he was playing it off. He didn’t know Bucky had heard their confessions. He took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself. It didn’t work. His voice still came out shaky and uneven.

“I… overheard you and (y/n)...talking the other day. About...about your feelings for each other. And I just-” He couldn’t bring himself to say it again. He couldn’t lie about being happy to Steve’s face right then and there again. On the other end of the table, though, Steve’s face was completely neutral as if he were processing something and coming to a realization. He was, he just couldn’t believe how dense his friend could be.

“Bucky...we were talking about you.” With those words, the room grew silent. The brunette had to replay the words in his mind to make sure he heard them right.

“...me.” He repeated bluntly.

Steve briefly pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and his forefinger. “Yes, Buck. You. She was practicing on me to talk to you. I know it’s not really my place, but given the situation, she likes you. A lot.”

Bucky’s mouth was left agape as if he couldn’t find the right words to say. He really couldn’t. He couldn’t be that oblivious, could he? And how could someone so amazing as you like someone so destroyed as himself? There was no possible way. But the look on Steve’s face and his tone told a whole different story and Bucky trusted that man with his life. He would never lie, not about something like this. With his thoughts in another place, he ran his metal hand through his hair, pushing it back out of his face for only a split second.

“You’re not...you’re not kidding?” He inquired. He needed final clarification before he was going to go and make a fool of himself in front of you.

“You really did take all the stupid with you,” Steve deadpanned, “Dammit, Bucky, just go to her!”

That was by far enough to push him out the door and running down the hallway.

The soldier didn’t make it too far before he found himself pacing his quarters. The anxiety and overthinking caught up with him. He didn’t have a plan and he needed a plan. He couldn’t just rush in and tell you all flustered and mind everywhere. This was you for crying out loud! You deserve something nice, something planned out. Maybe a piece of jewelry? No, too unconventional and not personal enough. What about...no, that’s not you whatsoever. Before he could come up with another idea that was sure to be instantly shut down, there was a soft knock at his door.

“Bucky...I know you’re in there.” His entire being froze like a deer in headlights at the sound of your voice. His eyes were wide as he turned slowly to look at the door as if he could see you through it. “You’ve been distant these past few days, especially towards Steve and I. I just...I just want to make sure you’re okay. I’m worried about you.”

His breath caught in his throat, hearing the last four words even with how soft you spoke them. Oh god, He worried you. He pushed you away just like he did everyone else and now you were resorted to standing outside his locked door after not hearing from him for days, trying to still reach out to him. Open the door, idiot Steve’s voice rang out in his head and, as if it were a command, he walked up to the door and slowly turned to handle.

You couldn’t help but be a little surprised that the door actually opened. Sure it usually did for you, but the last three days he had shut you out, both avoiding and ignoring you so you weren’t really expecting him to actually open it, but you were beyond happy that he did.

“Oh, thank god. I was starting to think-” You cut off your own ramblings abruptly the moment your eyes caught sight of his face. You weren't sure what you expected. This wasn't the first time he had revealed himself to you in such a state, but each time your heart broke upon seeing the heavy bags under his eyes and the red swelling of them. His stubble had grown out longer than how he usually kept it and his face overall seemed to have a sort of shadow lingering over it. He gained said appearance every time he had an episode, but you never felt the need to voice how horrible he looked. This time, though, there was something a bit different; His sky blue eyes seemed to have a sort of shine to them, one that you hadn't ever seen accompany his said state.

Gently and slowly, as if approaching a stray kitten, you raised your hand towards his face. You stopped for a moment, testing the waters, making sure he was okay with it and wasn't flinching away. He wasn't. In fact, he was watching you as if he was expecting, or waiting, for your touch. Continuing forward, you brushed a few hairs out of his face and behind his ear. Your fingers barely brushed over the skin of his cheek, enough to feel the small hairs coating it and enough for him to lean into it as if craving more, but he was still restraining himself as if he wasn’t letting himself get that full satisfaction of your touch.

You pulled your hand away after a moment, not that you wanted to, but you were scared you would get carried away. Scared you would accidentally give in to what you craved, scared you would make him uncomfortable and hurt yourself in the process. You needed to emotionally step away, but, every time you so much as glanced into those crystal eyes, he pulled you right back in again without fail. It was a never-ending circle and you were running it’s track right now. As soon as your skin lost contact with his, you snuck a glance up at him and he just so happened to be giving you that kicked puppy look that made you fill with instant regret. He stepped to the side though, a silent sign you two had started a long time ago. He clearly wanted you to come in but didn’t have to voice it and you happily obliged.

He closed the door behind you before following you deeper into the room. His mind was going a mile a minute, thinking up and brushing away different ways to go about what he wanted to bring up. Knowing there was a strong possibility that you felt the same, he refused to waste any more time tiptoeing around when you can be his. When he can be yours. Of course, you took his panic-y silence as him retreating into himself from demons.

No less gentle than before, you easily grabbed onto his hand and led him to the couch, having no problem getting him to sit beside you. You guided his head to rest in your lap and he let you. His eyes slipped closed and a small sigh escaped his lips as your fingers carefully weaved through his locks and brushed down towards his nape in repeating motions. It was something that always calmed him and brought him some soft of peace and you were quick to pick up on it.

The two if you rested like that for a good while, his head on your thighs and your hand in his hair. It was meditative for the both of you, just basking in each other's presence. You didn't even notice his eyes blink open, settling on your face. Your own had fallen closed after a few minutes so the way he studied your features as if he were fully drinking you in for the first time was lost on you. If you could see him, you would have thought he had found some sort of treasure and, to him, he had. Every time he looked at you felt as if he were rediscovering it. If he didn’t trust Steve so much, he wouldn’t believe that you harbored any type of affection for him. But, even still, he hadn’t a clue why you did. Every ounce of doubt and putrid thoughts flooded into his mind.

As if on autopilot, his arm raised to caress your cheek with his index finger, knuckles still curled. Catching sight of the gleam of the metal, he almost pulled back, but you nuzzled into his touch regardless of the inorganic material. It made his heart swell to what felt like an unnatural size.

“Why me?” His voice cut through the silence before he realized what he was uttering. He cursed himself in his head, but a small smile graced your lips before your eyes opened just enough to gaze down at him. He swears there are stars hidden in them.

“How long d’ya got, Buck? ‘Cus this could take a while.” She chuckles slightly, not even bothering to ask what he was talking about or how he had known. Honestly, you thought he had picked it up the last time you had thrown a flirty remark his way.

“Seriously, Doll. You could...you deserve so much better. I couldn’t-” He didn’t even need to finish his sentence for you to know the self-deprecating road he was going down. Your eyes flashed for a moment and your fingers in his hair halted.

“And who told you what I deserve? I’ll kick their ass. If it was you, don’t worry. I’ll kick your ass too. Because I can tell when someone is selfless and kind, who is gentle and compassionate, who defends those who cannot defend themselves but is a total badass at the same time. Which, by the way, that combination is pretty hot if I do say so myself. And those pants just tie the whole image together.” Your voice was so definite like you had massive amounts of evidence to prove that your words were fact to anyone who tried to challenge them wrong. The small smirk that appeared on your face mid-sentence died down to a loving smile and it made his heart race that it was aimed at him, “And I can most definitely tell when someone is so deserving of love.”

Bucky was speechless. He couldn’t fathom someone like you seeing him in such a light. You spoke so highly of him that it rivaled Steve and it affected him right to his core. He didn’t even have time to process any further negative thoughts before he found himself sitting up, your face being held by his hands and his forehead resting on yours. His breath fanned onto your lips, beckoning you closer than you already were. His eyes, the very same eyes that made you weak in the knees, are what made you lose restraint. With no hesitation left, you tilted your chin up, sealing your lips together.

Immediately, he moved one of his arms down to snake around your waist, pulling you impossibly close to him as his lips easily responded to yours, moving in time to the beats of your hearts. The fingers that remained on your cheek carded through your hair before resting on the back of your neck, tracing the start of your hairline with his thumb. The feeling was so much more than what either of you was hoping for and it filled you to the brim.

Before it felt like it even started, you had to pull back to gain some of your breath back. Of course, with his supersoldier perks, Bucky could have gone on longer so a small whine emitted from the back of his throat at the sudden lack of contact. You giggled, your eyes still closed as your thumb brushed over his slightly chapped lips.

“I guess this means you finally picked up on my flirting?” You playfully asked. Bucky chuckled, nudging his nose against yours before responding.

“Actually...long story. Steve might have...hinted.” He wasn’t going to explain the whole misunderstanding to you quite yet, slightly embarrassed about the whole ordeal. But, if going through all that pain over again meant he got to hold you in his arms and kiss you senseless, he would do it in a heartbeat.

You paused for a second and Bucky could feel your nose scrunching up. “Imma kill him.” He let out a loud laugh and the vibrations you felt stem from his chest almost made up for the poking Steve did in your love life.

“We should probably be thanking Steve actually. If it wasn’t for him- I mean, with your attempts at flirting, nobody would be able to catch on.” He teased. You let out a scoff.

“Are you saying that I can’t be smooth?”

“All I’m asking is if that’s really what you call flirting, doll.” The soldier continued to playfully mock. Your jaw fell open as you leaned back to look at his smirking self.

“Oh, that’s how you want to play it, Barnes. Alright.” You squint your eyes at him as you shuffle out of his grip and stand up straight. He watched you, clearly bemused. “I’ll be in my room,” you informed before beginning to walk off to the door. Of course, you weren’t expecting to get far, but you would be lying if you said you didn’t let out a small screech when you felt arms wrap around your waist and tug you back into a large chest.

“You’re not going anywhere, sweetheart.” You let out a loud laugh as he pressed kisses to your cheek and forehead, his scruff tickling your skin. You didn’t even protest when he fell back to the couch, locking you in a bear hug that you had no wish to escape.

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