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simplyholl · 1 day

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The Newlywed Game

Summary: You’re forced to play The Newlywed Game with your ex situationship.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F. Reader

Warnings: Angst. Smuttish, but not my usual descriptive smut. 18+ Only. Minors DNI.

See my Masterlist here

“I can’t.” That’s all the explanation you got when Bucky ended your situationship. You were friends with benefits for almost a year. The only rule he had was don’t fall in love. He had too much baggage and he never wanted a family. He didn’t want anyone to depend on him.

You couldn’t blame him, he was traumatized by Hydra. Trapped inside his own body for decades, he was afraid it could happen again. You jumped in head first with him anyways. You were in his bed after every mission, every meeting, every day. You basically lived in his room, not that he would ever admit that. Then one rainy afternoon, you knocked on his door like always. Except this time, he didn’t pull you into his warm embrace.

He moved out of the way so you could come in, and immediately you knew something was wrong. You reached for him, ready to console him, desperate for his touch. He had just finished a mission with Sam and he’d been gone for two weeks. You missed him, and he was usually so excited to see you.

When you placed your hand on his cheek, rubbing the scruff that had grown while he was gone, he wrapped his fingers around your wrist removing it. “I can’t do this anymore.” His voice was so low you could barely understand. Your eyes narrowed at his words. “Have I done something wrong?”

“This has gone on for longer than it should have. I can’t let it anymore.” Your throat tightens, but you refuse to cry in front of him. You walked out and your relationship with him was never the same. You didn’t hang out anymore.

When you were alone, he would leave. He didn’t sit beside you during the Friday night movie. He didn’t choose you for his partner on game night. The other Avengers didn’t know for sure that you were hooking up. You hid it pretty well. They had their suspicions, but neither of you ever confirmed it.

Tony called everyone to the back yard. “What’s all this?” Steve asks, pointing to the stage he had set up. “It’s my anniversary tomorrow and Pepper said she always wanted to play the Newlywed Game. So I had this built so we could play.”

“That’s great, Tony. But who are you all going to play with? There’s four set up’s and only two couples.” Steve gestures to Wanda and Vision. “Thought about that and Cap, you and Natasha are going to play and….” He looks at the whole team, everyone looking in different directions trying not to make eye contact. Except for Sharon, who hung around a lot lately. She was getting closer to Bucky, obviously wanting Tony to choose them. You roll your eyes. “Barnes and Y/N. There now we have all our couples. I’m going to go get Pep, you guys take your spots.”

You look at Bucky,but he’s busy talking to Steve about how ridiculous it is. You hear Sharon agree that he should have chosen someone else. When Pepper comes in, she excitedly claps her hands together. She points to the other teams, “You’re going down!” She laughs, but you can’t help but protest, “This is rigged! You guys and Wanda and Vision are the only real couples!! How is anyone else supposed to win?”

Tony shoots you a death glare but answers, “Cap and Natasha have definitely bumped uglies before. And you and Barnes are close friends. I thought that would make it more fair. But, I do expect to win.” You cross your arms, but accept his answer. Bucky finally looks at you, but it’s not friendly.

Sam comes out, wearing a suit Tony made him wear to host. “I’ll explain the rules. You all have a whiteboard, marker, and eraser. I will ask a question and you will write your answer on your boards. If your answer matches your partner’s you get a point. I’ll eliminate one couple each round until the final tie breaker.”

You take a deep breath. This is hell. But, you do know Bucky better than anyone, so as long as he didn’t ask any crazy questions, you would be fine. “First question. Where is the craziest place you and your partner have had sex?” You freeze. Of course Stark had these wild questions. If you both answered the same, everyone would know that you had hooked up.

You think about lying, but decide the ball should be in Bucky’s court. You’ll answer correctly, and if he doesn’t you’ll know he doesn’t want anyone to know. You quickly scribble your answer, waiting on Sam to call on you. Tony’s answer is Steve’s room and Pepper’s matched. Everyone laughed while Steve said Tony has to pay for his room to be deep cleaned.

Wanda and Vision both answer “in the air.” Natasha and Steve said a table in the meeting room. You turn your board to reveal your answer and Bucky shows his. You look and see that he has answered correctly. “The quinjet?! Damn y’all are nasty!” Sam laughs.

You’re taken back to that moment. You, Bucky, and Bruce were on your way back from a mission. Bruce was driving the quinjet, but activated the mode Tony installed for breaks. As soon as he started snoring, Bucky led you to the bathroom. He took you against the wall, metal hand across your mouth to stifle your moans. It was one of the hottest things you’d ever done. Your suit clung to you in the worst ways after that. His cum dripping down your legs, it was nearly impossible to take off.

The others look at each other in surprise. Scott yells “I told you they were hooking up. No one believed me!” Sharon looks at Bucky so harshly that if looks could kill, he’d be dead. He just shrugs his shoulders. Of course, he would be hooking up with her. Why wouldn’t he? She was pretty and it had been three months since he ended things with you.

The next question was “Who hogs the covers more?” Everyone got it right except for Steve and Natasha. She said that wasn’t a fair question because they never actually slept when they were together. The round continued with four more questions. At the end, Steve and Natasha were eliminated because they had the least amount of points. The rest of you were tied.

“What is your partner’s pet name for you?” Sam asks. That’s easy, “doll”, you write. When you reveal your answers, Sharon looks furious. That must be what he calls her too. It stings, thinking of them together. You don’t have time to dwell on it before Sam asks the next question. “What is the highest number of orgasms your partner has given you in one night?” Your eyes widen, you know the answer, but you don’t know if he will remember.

Tony and Pepper answer three, Tony grins like the cocky asshole he is. Vision and Wanda answer two. Bucky raises his board, “Six?!” Sam shouts, “How were you guys fucking this much and nobody knew?” He laughs. The round surprisingly ends with Wanda and Vision getting eliminated.

But you’re busy thinking about that night. Bucky’s head between your thighs for hours. He barely came up for breath. You were sure he would smother, but he insisted. He didn’t stop until the sheets were soaked, your legs were shaking so hard, you’d immediately fall if you tried to stand up.

He had you screaming his name all night. When he finally started fucking you, he took his time, pulling another orgasm out of you before going back down for another taste. He finally came with you on top. He had to lift your limp body on him, using you like a sex doll. You couldn’t move if you needed too. It was the best sex you’d ever had.

“It’s time for the tie breaker question. Answers don’t have to match, the crowd will vote on the most romantic answers.” Sam states. “When did you know you were in love?” Tony and Pepper immediately begin writing. You’re certain you’re going to lose this one. Bucky was never in love with you. You write your answer, deciding to answer truthfully.

Tony and Pepper’s answers make you tear up, they are so in love. You can only hope you’ll find that one day. You and Bucky reveal your boards at the same time. You glance at his, his answer knocks the breath out of your lungs because it matches yours. The Avenger’s Barbecue. You lock eyes, his gaze softens as he reads your answer.

You’ll never forget such a pivotal moment in your life. All of the Avengers and Shield agents’ friends and family were invited to play games, eat, and have a good time. Emily, who helped coordinate your missions brought her husband and three young children. A baby girl, a two year old boy, and a five year old girl. The children were drawn to Bucky. The two older children swung from his metal arm while he held the baby with his other one.

The image made your ovaries explode. You couldn’t help imagining how he would be if you had kids. He laughed as they asked him a thousand questions, playing on him like a jungle gym. You knew without a doubt, you were in love.

Bucky took a deep breath when he read your answer. Why was it the same as his? Did you know? Was it a prank you were playing on him? Emily’s children were entranced with you from the moment they met you. He couldn’t blame them, he felt the same. They had played with him for an hour before the food was ready. When Tony told everyone to make a plate, you offered to watch the kids while she and her husband got their food.

Bucky watched as you comforted the crying infant. The two older children sat beside you while you read from a book the girl got from their bag. Bucky knew he was screwed. He could see a life like this so clearly. Your belly round with his baby, while you tended to your other children. He didn’t want to admit how badly he wanted that. The realization hit him like a ton of bricks. He was in love with you.

That night he made love to you, it was softer, slower than the other times he touched you. He knew you could tell the difference too. He placed one last kiss to your lips, willing himself to let you go. The next morning, he left for his two week mission with Sam. He convinced himself that it was for the best if he ended things. He didn’t want to hurt you. You might be okay with it now, but years later you would regret it.

You’d realize having the Winter Soldier for a husband wasn’t worth everything you would have to go through. Then Sharon started flirting with him after Steve rejected her. He hadn’t so much as hugged her, but she acted like she was entitled to him.

Everyone voted for Tony and Pepper to win. They were the real couple and it was their anniversary tomorrow. Tony was going to treat everyone to dinner for being such good sports. You got out of there as soon as it was over. You needed a nap before going to dinner. It was all too much for you. How the hell did you and Bucky make it so far in the game? Why did he have the same answer for the last question? You convince yourself that he knew how you felt.

That night changed everything. The sex was different. If you didn’t know better, you’d swear he was making love to you. He had to be messing with your head. Somehow you manage to fall asleep even with your thoughts racing.

You wake up two hours later, just enough time to get ready for dinner. You put on the little black dress Bucky loved. If he wants to play games, bring it on. You apply your perfume when a light knock sounds on your door. You would recognize the knock anywhere. “Come in” you call. Bucky walks in, his tight black t-shirt hugging him in the best ways.

“Hey doll, we need to talk.” You put your earrings in, anger surging through you. “Talk about what? How you were trying to humiliate me up there? How you’re banging Sharon now? There’s nothing to talk about. You should just go.”

“Humiliate you? What about me? How did you know the answer to the last question?” He demands, charging toward you. “I answered it truthfully, James. How did you know my answer?” You ask, hands on your hips. “I answered honestly too.” He confesses, his blue eyes sweeping over the swell of your breasts.

“Stop lying! I don’t see what the point is. We have been over for three months. Why are you doing this?” He shakes his head, “I was telling the truth. I realized I was in love with you when all those kids were sitting in your lap. I could see our life together. And I wanted it, the kids, the white picket fence, the big house, you.”

“Bucky, I wanted all that with you too. Seeing you playing with those kids made me realize it too.” You sigh, feeling relieved to finally get it off your chest. His lips crash into yours, hands moving at lightning speed to remove all of your clothing. You’re under him in seconds, panting against his lips as he rubs himself against you.

Bucky moans as he sinks into you. He’s always known deep down you were made for him, now he has no choice but to accept it. “I’m so in love with you.” He tells you between thrusts. You claw at his back, his confession almost sends you over the edge. “I am so in love with you, Buck.” You kiss him gently. “Say it again.” He smiles, as you get lost in each other.

Tags

@cindylynn @wheredafandomat @multifandom-worlds @loz-3 @megharat-barnes-reid @kats72 @crimson25 @mochie85 @cakesandtom @lokidokieokie @theallknown213 @alexakeyloveloki @tmilover1993 @yeaiamme2 @pigeonmama @yeehawbrothers @lokischambermaid @fictive-sl0th @nomajdetective @goblingirlsarah @foxherder @weirdothatwritess @silver-tongue-taken-to-bed @freegardenbanananeck @lamentis-10 @jainaeatsstars @queenshu

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cosmicbucky · 6 months

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verity

summary: an inadvertently broken heart and a girls' night in can only lead to one thing: you drunkenly confronting the very man who broke your heart in the first place - aka your best friend, bucky barnes pairing: bucky barnes x female reader word count: 3253

warnings: angst, alcohol consumption, reader gets drunk with friends, pet names, sad bucky, sad reader, drunk confessions, swearing, misunderstandings, reader gets sick (vomit), fluff, kinda friends to lovers (??)

《《《《 ♡ 》》》》

The music flowed through the living room around you, quiet enough to not overpower the conversations you were having with your friends, but loud enough for you to know what you were swaying in your seat to.

It had been a while since you had a girls' night, though you were all but forced into this one; it was made clear by Nat that your presence was not an option - you were the only reason you were all gathered here now, each of you at least a bottle or two in.

At first you resisted. You wanted nothing more than to wallow alone in your room, watching trash TV and crying over cheesy scenes. It wasn't that you didn't love the company you had right now, you just wanted other company. You wanted the same company you had every day for the last year. The same company that became your only solace ever since it took a literal bullet for you without thought just to keep you safe. The same company that read your favourite books so you had someone to talk to about them. The same company that sat with you and watched all your favourite shows so they could get a better glimpse of who you are and what you like. The same company you thought you were finally getting somewhere with.

It felt like you got hit by a truck when the words "You know Bucky's been dating?" nonchalantly left Sam's mouth one day while you were having lunch. You didn't want to know more about it. You didn't want to know who they were, how the two met, or what they did for a living. You didn't want to be told anything other than the fact Sam was joking, that what you thought you had with Bucky really was real and not just in your head. Sam never said anything close to that, though.

Bucky never brought up the dates to you, and you almost felt that was even worse than if he did. Why did he not want to tell you? Were you really not as close as you thought? Did he not trust you enough to tell you such a thing? Your thoughts continuously spiraled over the next few days, stealing away your self confidence and the air from your lungs. Nothing was the same anymore. You thought you knew where you stood with Bucky. You thought it all meant something. All the stares from across the room, the lingering touches, the 'just because' gifts, the movie nights, the sleepovers, all of it. But it meant nothing. You read it all wrong. And now it's been two weeks since you were able to look at him long enough for you to even say hi to him, let alone have a conversation with him.

Bucky noticed the shift the moment it happened; when you slid ever so slightly away from him when he tried to hold you in his arms like he did every movie night. He noticed when the smile stopped reaching your eyes. He noticed when you stopped showing up for dinners with the gang every night. He noticed when you couldn't hold his gaze anymore. He noticed that you two just weren't the same, and it killed him. It killed him because he didn't know what he did, and he tried everything under the sun to get things back to the way they were, but nothing worked.

Everyone noticed when his demeanor changed. His fuse was shorter, his temper was stronger. He spent even more time in the training room, pummeling and destroying bag after bag until his knuckles were bloody; letting himself heal overnight only to do it all again the next day. He shamelessly threw a dining chair into a wall when Tony made a joke about how you must have smartened up and finally got sick of him, and his expression was so murderous that a Code White was called, effectively resulting in him being locked down in his room for a full 24 hours - he ended up staying in there even after the lockdown was over. The only reason he started leaving the confines of his room was to spend time with his best girl, and he didn't have that anymore.

All your friends were sick of it. They didn't know what was going on, and you both refused to talk about it. No one could even mention the others' name to either of you anymore without fear of having the nearest object thrown at their head.

So plans were formed, and you now sat on the couch with a glass in your hand as you mindlessly swayed to whatever song was currently playing.

"Who is in charge of this music? It is awful!" Yelena stated from her spot on the floor, taking yet another shot.

"I picked it," you crooned, stilling your movements as you looked at her. "It's completely free of attachments to you-know-who."

A cohesive muttering came from all the women before you, and Yelena cleared her throat. "It is not bad," she corrected with a grimace, taking pity on you.

"Are you drunk enough to tell us what happened now?" Nat asked, raising an eyebrow at you.

Downing the rest of your glass, you looked at her with a thoughtful expression for a minute. "No," you concluded, filling your glass again.

"Okay, this is torture. Time for a drinking game!" Wanda exclaimed, standing from her chair. "Everyone take a mustache and tape it to the TV. We're putting on a trash show and drinking whenever it lines up with someone."

You beamed with excitement, ready to both watch crappy TV and get drunk - gods know you needed at least one night to forget about Bucky.

And forget you did. You can't remember the last time you were this far gone, the last time you had this much fun. The drinking game was very successful; it even got Yelena and Nat a little tipsy, which was not easy to do. No one said anything when you went a little harder than everyone else, when you drank a little more, taking shots when you weren't technically supposed to. You haven't smiled like this in weeks, and they weren't going to take that away from you.

Your giggles carried on down the hallway, the echoes of your voice, of your laughter, music to everyone's ears - having gone so long now without hearing it. It captured someone's attention, socked feet being dragged towards the sound before even knowing what was happening, a seat being taken in the kitchen just to be that much closer, eyes gazing across at you, a face with such an amorous expression it would have made anyone who saw it sick.

You audibly gasped as you caught sight of him, your eyes meeting his for the briefest of seconds before he looked away, contemplating whether he should go back to his room or not.

"Oh, my god. Why is he here?" you asked the girls, unable to take your eyes off of him.

"Why is who here?" Kate asked, following your gaze. "Him? What are you talking about he-"

"We don't know!" Nat chimed in, sending a warning glare to Kate that you were too distracted to see.

"Why don't you go talk to him and find out?" Wanda suggested, quickly catching on to Nat's motive.

You shook your head vehemently, making yourself momentarily dizzy. "Noooo. He broke my heart, Wan. What would I even say?" you replied with a whine, sinking into the couch as you lifted the glass to your lips again.

She shared a look with Nat, two looks that said 'fuck, maybe we shouldn't let her do this' and 'what the hell does she mean by that?' You couldn't decipher either, though. The blood was rushing in your ears as you stared across the room again, torn between going to confront this beautiful, asshole of a man and staying in the comfort of the living room.

Before you could really think it through - and in your state, it's not like you really could anyway - you abruptly stood from the couch, taking a few seconds to steady yourself on your feet.

"Fuck him," you muttered to yourself, vaguely aware of the girls trying to get your attention as you marched across the floor.

His head snapped up when he heard you coming, his enhanced hearing paired with the fact you weren't exactly in a graceful state didn't give you the advantage of sneaking up on him.

"Hi, doll," he said once you approached him.

Had you been in a more collected frame of mind, you probably would have noticed how quiet his voice was, how strained it was from the fact he was holding his breath in the hopes the two of you would go back to normal. You would have noticed the pain, the hurt, the confusion, and the hope dancing around in his eyes; making the blue that used to be your favourite colour now dull and stormy.

You didn't notice, though. All you noticed was the burning pain in your heart that was supposed to be gone after all those drinks, but just one look at the man before you brought everything back.

"You can't call me that anymore," you declared, shaking your head so much it made the room spin even more. "You gotta keep that name reserved now," you added bitterly.

"Reserved?" Bucky asked, his brow knit together in confusion. "For who?"

You scoffed, walking forward to close the distance that was left between you and the table he sat at. A few steps in and you lost your footing, but before you could even stumble Bucky was already out of his seat. His hands were on your arms in an instant, the feeling of hot and cold both burning your skin in a familiar way. The tenderness of his touch and the yearning you felt for it after all this time was almost too much to bear; your mind was spinning. Spinning from alcohol. Spinning from heartache. Spinning from anger. Spinning, spinning, spinning.

"Let go of me!" you exclaimed angrily, shrugging yourself out of his grasp. "I don't think your little lover would want you touchin' me."

Bucky could only stand there, blinking in surprise with his hands still outstretched. "My what?" he asked, his hands slowly falling back to his sides. "My lover?" he repeated.

"Yeah, your lover - or… whatever the hell you want to call them. Sam told me, because you didn't," you told him indignantly.

"I- what? Sam told you? Sam told you what?" he asked, more confused than ever.

"That you're dating someone!" you yelled, the anguish clear in your voice.

Bucky sighed and ran his hands over his face in exasperation before resting them on his hips, his lips pursed as he collected his thoughts. "What the fuck are you talking about?" he finally asked, trying to put the pieces together in his head.

"Didn't expect me to know, did you?" you spat furiously.

"I don't- sweetheart, what the hell is going on?" he asked softly, trying his best to remain patient. You were finally talking to him again, and it's definitely not the way he imagined but he'd be damned if he was going to let you slip through his fingers again.

"No!" you said forcefully. "I'm not your sweetheart. She is. Whoever she is."

"There is no ‘she’," Bucky told you calmly, trying his hardest to make sense of what was going on.

"Okay, then he is!" you replied in defeat, finally throwing yourself down on the chair beside you.

"What? No, that's not-" he tried to answer you, but you quickly cut him off.

"Why didn’t you want to tell me?" you asked quietly, your voice cracking.

“Because… I’m not dating anyone,” he replied slowly, more of a question than a statement.

“Just stop lying!” you yelled, hands slamming onto the table. “Please, I can’t take you lying to me anymore, okay? You’ve been lying to me all year,” you added in desperation, your eyes starting to glisten with tears.

“All year?” he asked, his voice quiet and shaky as he slid into the seat across from you.

You could only nod your head, bottom lip trembling as the first tears started to fall down your cheeks. Bucky started burning from the inside out, wanting nothing more than to wrap you in his arms and kiss the tears away- but he couldn’t. So he stayed where he was, swallowing thickly as he willed himself not to start crying with you.

“I never lied to you, you know that,” he said carefully.

“You did, because this whole time you-... I really thought-... you made me think-” you couldn’t get the words out, falling silent as you tried to collect yourself.

Bucky instinctively reached his hands across the table to you before he caught himself, pulling them back and setting them on his lap. "What did I make you think?"

"That you trusted me. That we meant something to each other," you explained softly, swallowing back more tears. "I thought you loved me back," you added, your voice so quiet it would have been inaudible to anyone other than him.

"What?" Bucky breathed out, the air being stolen from his lungs with those last six words that spilled from your trembling lips.

"I know you heard me."

"Okay- now is not the time for this conversation," he sighed, running his hands over his face.

You sat in silence for a moment, looking at him with such an recognizable expression Bucky felt like he was looking at a completely different person. "Figures," you muttered before shoving your chair back and standing up.

"What are you doing?" Bucky asked, half out of his seat as he watched to make sure you were steady on your feet.

Without another word to him, you turned and carefully started to make your way out of the kitchen and towards your bedroom.

"Don't you dare walk away from me!" Bucky called from behind you, quickly on your heels. "No, you're not allowed to leave me like this again."

"You left me first!" you yelled back, placing your hand on the wall to keep your balance as you walked a little faster.

"I never left you once!" he argued, still hot on your trail.

You scoffed, shoving open the door to your room and trying to slam it in his face; the attempt was unsurprisingly futile. "Stop following me, you said you don't want to talk."

"No, I said this isn't the time for this conversation," he huffed, shoving his way into your room and closing the door behind him.

"Why? You don't want to admit what you did?" you asked, stumbling your way to sit on the bed.

"For fucks sake, I didn't even do anything!" he defended with exasperation, leaning against the door.

"Yes you did," you argued, attempting to take off your sweater.

"I'm telling you, I didn't," he told you, trying his best to not let out a laugh as he watched you struggle to lift the sweater over your head.

"You did!" you yelled, voice muffled by the fabric. "You lied, and you kept secrets, and you - god, can you fucking help me?!" you asked with a huff, interrupting your own rant.

Bucky suppressed his laugh as he stepped forward, kneeling down in front of you. "Alright, alright. Stop fuckin' squirmin'," he muttered.

You stilled, muttering a few choice words under your breath that did not go unnoticed by him. Grasping the hem of your sweater, he carefully lifted it up and over your head to reveal your disheveled, pouting face.

"There's my girl," he whispered softly, delicately brushing back your mussed hair.

"I'm not-" you started to argue, before he quickly cut you off.

"Yes. You. Are," he said firmly, enunciating each word.

"But Sam-"

"Is an idiot," he insisted, cutting you off again. "He tried to set me up with someone but I never went. When he asked me about it, I told him we were gonna go out again so he'd stop fucking bugging me about it. I lied, sweetheart. I was never dating anyone."

"You- there was no one?" you asked quietly.

"There was no one else," he told you, his thumbs brushing away stray tears you didn't even know were falling.

Before you could ask him what that meant, your room started spinning once more and your mouth felt like cotton and your stomach felt like it was making its way up your throat.

"I don't feel so good," you mumbled, staring at him with wide eyes for a moment before rushing to your bathroom, barely making it on time.

Bucky was at your side in the blink of an eye, holding back your hair as you let loose the contents of your girls' night, his hand ghosting up and down your back. He sat patiently with you, muttering comforting words between each second of you getting sick as you gasped for air and sobbed, occasionally wiping your face with tissues.

"Better?" he asked after a few minutes, his hands never leaving you.

You could only nod in response, shifting away from him to rest against the bathtub as you closed your eyes.

Bucky immediately fell into his old habits, wasting no time in taking care of you. The only thing that destroyed him more than not having you in his life lately was watching you practically wither away, unable to do a damn thing about it.

"Drink, sweet girl," he told you, caressing your cheek in an attempt to rouse you before handing you the water you had no idea he even retrieved.

You blinked up at him, taking a moment to process what was going on before taking the glass from him. As you drank he gathered up a washcloth, running it under cold water before kneeling before you once more.

"C'mere," he whispered, taking your chin in one hand to hold you in place as he gently wiped your face. Your eyes closed once more, sighing in content as the cold water eased the burning under your skin.

"I love you," you found yourself telling him. Your voice was a delicate whisper, but the words were so heavy you felt like they echoed off the tiles surrounding you anyway.

Bucky stayed quiet, but you refused to open your eyes and look at him. Looking at him would make this moment real, so as long as you kept your eyes closed, you could pretend none of this ever happened.

"Let's get you to bed," he finally said, causing your world to implode once more.

Completely defeated, you allowed him to lift you from the floor.

Not having the energy to fight him anymore, you cooperated as he helped you into some sleep clothes.

Wanting to just hide away forever, you let him tuck you under the covers, pressing a kiss to your forehead before he slid in beside you, wanting to be there in case you got sick again.

The room was engulfed by silence for so long it almost felt like it was suffocating you, but just before your whirling mind finally succumbed to the allure of sleep you heard Bucky's gentle voice speaking out to you.

"Sleep this off, angel. Because when I explain to you how in love with you I am, I want to make damn sure you can remember what I say."

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imtryingbuck · 4 months

Text

Through The Years

~series masterlist~

Summary: Bucky comes from a well respected family, he falls in love with a girl who prefers the simple things in life. Follow their journey through the years.

Series Warnings: mentions of child abuse (a huge part of the first few years) Death, attempted murder, attempted suicide, heavy heavy use of pet names - Ducky and Bunny, swearing. More warnings will be listed in the individual chapter.

Word Count: 53,861

Status: completed

A/N: no description of reader other than she has curly hair.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!reader

Masterlist

fluff - ❀ angst - ❁ both - ✾

➳ Seven - ✾

➳ Seven pt two - ❁

➳ Eleven - ✾

➳ Fifteen - ❁

➳ Eighteen - ✾

➳ Eighteen pt two - ❀

➳ Twenty one - ✾

➳ Twenty Five - ✾

➳ Thirty - ✾

➳ Thirty Five - ✾

➳ Forty - ✾

➳ Forty Five - ✾

➳ Fifty Five - ✾

➳ Seventy - ❁

➳ Epilogue - ✾

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angstysebfan · 10 months

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Just Friends - Part 1

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader Summary: This is a 2-parter. You've been just friends with Bucky since you first joined the Avengers, but is there more? You both deny it. What happens with Bucky gets a girlfriend, who may not like your relationship? Warnings: Angst, jealousy, asshole girlfriends, cursing

A/N: I hope I made this even better than it was before. It’s a 2-parter. Part 2 will hopefully be out tomorrow. None of my stories are edited or beta’d. If you want to be a part of my taglist, please request. My old taglist no longer is active.

When you first joined the Avengers, you instantaneously felt comfortable with everyone, but there was one person that you clicked with more than the others. Bucky Barnes. He was shy for maybe a day before realizing how much you both have in common. He became your person and you became his, platonically of course. Sometimes you wonder if there is more, but you don't dwell on it much. You're happy being exactly what you are to each other. Like right now, you're sitting on the couch watching TV, your feet on Bucky’s lap, with him massaging your calves. You both sit and watch Ace Ventura, because you both love comedy and Jim Carey is king. When the movie was finally over, you look over at Bucky and give him a smile.

“So what do you want to do now?” you ask, nudging your foot into his hard abdomen.

He squeezes your foot and tickles the bottom of it, making you giggle and pull your foot toward you. He chuckles and grabs you foot back to put in on his lap, continuing his massage.

“We could take a nap,” he said with raised eyebrows.

You smile and nod at him excitedly. “Your room or mine?” you ask.

He stands up, letting your feet drop, he turns and reaches for your hands. He pulls you off the couch and leads you toward his room, stilling holding onto your one hand.

You close the door behind you and climb into the bed with Bucky, and snuggle into his open arms. You feel a kiss on the top of your head and nuzzle your nose into his chest. It didn’t take you long to fall asleep with the sound of his steady heartbeat and the warmth of his arms. This is probably your favorite place.

When you wake up, a few hours later, you realize you're alone in his room. You decide to look for him and head back toward the common room and hear Sam, Steve and Bucky talking.

“It’s not a big deal guys. Y/N is my best friend… besides you,” you guess Bucky points at Steve when he says this last part.

“I don’t know man, you guys act like you’re dating,” Sam says.

“Are you sure you don’t have feelings for her?” you hear Steve ask.

Your heart starts pounding in your chest. Now you've been asked the same question by Nat and Wanda, and you always stated you were both just friends, but again you wonder if it's really true. And while you assume you know his answer, you kinda hope he says that he does have feelings, then you won't feel stupid for your "feelings".

“We're just friends,” he says with confidence.

You can’t help the slight disappointment, but shake it off because of course your just friends. You were perfectly okay with just being friends with Bucky, and you didn’t care that the rest of the team didn’t get it.

“Guys, trust me. I will NEVER see Y/N like that. She's far from my type. Plus, I already started talking to a girl, who's so amazing,” Bucky says.

You can’t help but gasp at that statement, and have tears coming down your cheeks. While you understand he may only like you as a friend, to hear that you'll never be his type hurts you more than you care to admit. Then to hear that he has been talking to someone else send another stab into your heart. Maybe you do have stronger feelings for Bucky than you realized, and maybe you need to deal with those feelings and quickly since they will never be reciprocated.

–

The next day you were in the the gym lifting weights, when Bucky came strolling in. He was on the phone, and you couldn’t help but notice the wide smile he had on. When he hung up the phone, he made a B-line to you. You take a deep breath and get into the correct head space.

“Hello my Bella. Haven’t seen you since our nap yesterday. Everything okay?” He asks. You continue with your exercise and give him a small smile. “Yup.” He looks at you, waiting for more of an answer. When you don’t elaborate, he can’t help but feel nervous, but quickly shakes it away.

“Hey, you busy later? I kinda have someone I want you to meet.” He asks. You look into his eyes, prepared to blow him off, but you see the hope in them. “Um… yea sure.” you say quietly. He smiles and walks toward the punching bag to begin his own workout.

After you both finish your workouts, and shower, he knocks on your door. “Hey Belle, you ready?” he asks when you open the door. “Uh, yeah. Let’s go.” You walk out of the room, and Bucky immediately wraps his flesh arm around your shoulders, as he leads you to the elevator.

Once you left the compound, you both walk to the pizza place about a 20 minute walk since the compound property is so big. Bucky has his arm around you the entire time, and eventually you wrap yours around his waist and relax. So what you're going to meet a girl he is talking to. Talking to someone is nothing, and maybe it won't even work out. You both enter the pizza place, and Bucky leads you toward a red head sitting in the booth in the back. Bucky had immediately released you when you entered, but grabbed your hand as he lead you walked to the booth.

The red head smiles at Bucky, but her smile slips slightly as her eyes asses you and your joined hands. You can’t help the blush of anxiety in your cheeks. Bucky releases your hand, when the red head gets out of the booth and tightly embraces her.

“Hey, Dot. You been waiting long?” he asks.

She shakes her head ‘no’ into his chest as her hands caress the hairs on the back of his neck. When they pull apart, she holds his head and pulls him into a kiss. Your breath hitches and you try to look somewhere else, wanting nothing more than to cry and possibly vomit. Bucky pulls away from Dot and turns to look at you with an embarrassed smile. You see the blush in his cheeks, but you try to act nonchalant, and you hope you succeed. Bucky takes your hand and pulls you next to him.

“Dot, this is Y/N. She's my best friend. Y/N, this is Dot. My girlfriend,” he says looking between the two of you with a proud smile.

Your eyes snap up to Bucky’s in surprise. Girlfriend?! You thought he was just talking but they are actually dating? What. The. Fuck! You put your spy talents to use and pretend to be somewhat happy.

“Dot, it's nice to meet you,” you say as you extend your hand to shake hers.

Dot looks at you with a fake smile. “I’m sure,” she says as she grabs your hand.

You are taken aback by this, but squeeze her hand as hard as you can. You see her wince, and just grin at her. Bucky looks happy and motions for the three of you to sit in the booth. He sits next to Dot, and they hold hands and Bucky caressing hers with his thumb. Throughout the whole lunch Dot kept leaning into Bucky and constantly touched him. You get more aggravated each time she touches him, knowing she was staking her claim on him in front of you. She obviously found you and your relationship with Bucky threatening. She also talks to him in a squeaky babylike voice, that runs right through you. You try your best to act the part of the best friend, but your heart is completely broken. No wonder he'll never look at you like that. This is obviously the type of girl he is interested in, and you will never be this type of girl. Thank god.

When you're done, you walk outside of the restaurant, turn and look at Dot.

“It was nice to meet you,” you say with a fake but polite smile.

She gives you a knowing smirk, “You too, uh… I’m sorry what was your name again?” she says.

Your polite smile falls and scowl forms. “Y/N,” you say flatly.

“Right, Y/N.”

You look at Bucky, “You ready to go?” you say.

Bucky looks weird and is avoiding you eyes, “Um, actually I’m going to go to Dot’s for the night,” he says quietly.

You're fucking pissed because you walked here, which means you now have to walk back, alone. It’s now basically dark, and you are in nowhere upstate New York. You stare at Bucky in disbelief and then at Dot, who has a smug grin on her face as she wraps her arms around Bucky, pulling him in the direction of her car.

“Oh, great. Well… uh.. have fun,” you say quickly but making sure he knew you were pissed.

You turn around and start walking back toward the compound feeling utterly defeated and pissed. You hear Bucky call your name asking you to wait a moment, but you just keep walking, tears running down your face. You feel your phone vibrating, knowing he was calling you, but again you ignore it. You walk up to the border of the compound property and stop and take a breath. You wanted to calm down before you went in. You look at your phone and see Bucky texted you.

I’m so sorry, Bells. I know should've told you.

Don't hate me.

Please let me know when you get back.

You decide to ignore him, he didn’t deserve to know you were back. You take another deep breath and walk up the walkway toward the building. You take the elevator to your floor and go straight to your room. You decide to shower and get ready for bed.

You lay there, wondering what will happen tomorrow when Bucky comes back. Suddenly your phone vibrates again. Its Bucky:

We really need to talk, tomorrow.

–

You wake up the next day and look at your phone. It was already 11:30. You quickly get up and change before heading down to the gym. You're half way through your run on the treadmill when Bucky walks in not looking like his normal happy self around you. He looks over at you, coldly and walks over. He then starts to look uncomfortable when he stops in front of you, and won’t meet your eyes.

“Hey,” you say.

He just nods. “Y/N, can you stop for a second, I need to talk to you,” he says, still avoiding your eyes.

You bring the treadmill to a stop and step down feeling confused by his demeanor.

“What’s going on?” you ask cautiously.

Bucky now looks at you, but his stare is hard and cold. You feel the air leave your lungs as you feel the anger starting to radiate off of him.

“Our friendship is over, Y/N,” he says, like it is nothing.

You feel the tears start to build. “What? Why? Buck… is this because I wouldn’t answer you last night? I.. I was upset because you didn’t give me the heads up about anything. I mean you didn't warn me I would be meeting your girlfriend, and then when introduce me to Dot, she made it pretty damn obvious she didn’t like me. Then to top it all off you made me walk home alone. I had a right to be pissed, but now you're ending the friendship?”

Bucky glares at you. “You made Dot feel very uncomfortable yesterday. She told me that you squeezed her hand too tight and would constantly make her feel like you were looking down on her. You were supposed to be my friend, and support me in my first relationship. Dot doesn’t like how close I am with you, and I want this relationship with her to work, because I think she could be the one for me. So I’m sorry, we need to end our friendship and keep our distance from each other.”

Tears are falling from your eyes, but you can’t help but get angry. “Are you fucking kidding me, James? I made her uncomfortable? She was assessing me from the moment we walked in the damn restaurant! I mean did you hear what she said when you introduced us? Or how about when I was leaving, she didn't even remember my name. But of course you don't give a shit about that, huh? So obviously our friendship has meant absolutely nothing to you this whole time! So fine, consider our friendship over, and stay the hell away from me. Goodbye Bucky.”

You push him out of the way and run out of the gym. Bucky’s heart is in his throat. He honestly doesn’t know what to do because when he spoke to Dot last night, she made it seem like you made her uncomfortable. He does want to try with Dot, because he knows he could never be with... you. Now he's lost you for good, which he thought would help him get over his feelings for you, but seeing your face broken by his words killed him in a way he never felt before.

He feels like he just made the worst mistake in his whole life.

Part 2

Oh Bucky you done fucked up man. Dot can go all the way to hell, and Bucky you might be joining her dude. Feedback is appreciated.

Permanent Taglist: @rebekahdawkins @marajade1974 @missvelvetsstuff @phillygirl77 @pattiemac1 @winterslove1917 @vampire7595

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stevenssacrab · 5 months

Text

Good Neighbor

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ✧ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ*

Summary: Seeing your neighbor constantly ordering takeout inspires you to offer him a home-cooked meal and your company.

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1.1k

a/n: As promised, one that isn't about Mr. Steven Grant. Hope someone out there appreciates the fallout 4 reference in the title lol. There will be a part 2 so look out for that soon! Hope y'all like it!

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ✧ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ*

Part 2

Bucky sighs as he submits the 4th DoorDash order of the week.

“There’s no way this is good for me,” he groaned loudly, tossing his phone to the side and throwing his head back on the sofa when a heavenly aroma hit his nose.

“Ugh, there goes Y/N cooking again,” he says, slightly annoyed at himself; he quietly steps out into the hallway, seeking more of the godly scent coming from your apartment. Bucky has been entranced by your cooking abilities; somehow, you find the willpower to make a delicious home-cooked meal every day; he doesn’t know how you do it.

You hum softly to yourself as you pull out your chicken pot pie. You loved this recipe, but it, unfortunately, served 8+ people, and you didn’t know that many people, so you just picked at it throughout the week, but this time was different; you noticed that your handsome neighbor Bucky is always ordering take out, you can’t imagine a night he didn’t order something in, so you’ve decided to be a good friendly neighbor and offer him some, it would go to waste anyways so might as well give it away, and if it meant you would get to talk to Bucky, you figured it wouldn’t hurt.

Knock knock, you tap lightly on his door, suddenly having second thoughts, but before you can change your mind, Bucky opens the door.

“Hey, what’s up?” He says, only slightly confused

“Hi, I’m Y/N,” you say, holding your hand out. Bucky shakes your hand, and you don’t miss how rough his hand feels against yours, how your hands fit together like puzzle pieces.

“Bucky,” he says, looking at you with a hint of something you can’t quite grasp.

“I made some chicken pot pie, and I have tons left over; I was wondering if you wanted what’s left. I see all the takeout and thought it may have been a while since you had a home-cooked meal.” You say, your eyes widening suddenly. “N-Not that I’m like watching you or something. You laugh awkwardly, eyes shifting everywhere. “I just happened to notice and.”

“Y/N, it's okay. I know what you meant,” he smiles at you.

“Come in, please,” he says, stepping aside to let you in.

“Okay,” you say shyly, slowly crossing the threshold into this home; it was much homier than you imagined. You were not sure what exactly you expected, but it wasn’t this; it was decorated with army medals and pictures of other Avengers enjoying life; it was odd seeing everyone superheroes, in regular clothes, having beers and singing karaoke, everyone being so ordinary. It was refreshing to see; it really humanized them for you. It, of course, never slipped your mind who Bucky was, but to you, he was always your neighbor who ordered too much takeout and had loud get-togethers.

“This smells so good, Y/N,” he beams, practically drooling over the pie.

“I’m glad you think so; it tastes even better,” you wink. Bucky looks away, smiling shyly. He leads you into his kitchen, placing the food at the breakfast bar. He pulls out your chair for you before he seats himself, digging in immediately.

“UGH, this is so fucking good,” he shouts, with a mouth full of food. “Oh, sorry, this is so good.” he laughs, shoving more food into his mouth.

“Mmm, what is this crust made out of?” He asks, chewing slowly, dissecting the flavors, and trying to pinpoint it.

“Cheddar and thyme,” you beam proudly, enjoying his reactions to the meal.

“Ugh, my god, genius.” He says lowly, “So, does your boyfriend love your cooking too?” He asks

“Oh, haha, no boyfriend, it’s just me,” you laugh awkwardly.

“No way, I’d marry you if it meant I got to eat like a king every day,” he says matter-of-factly.

“I might have to take you up on that offer,” you flirted back. Bucky practically licks the plate clean; he pushes the plate away and smacks the table in triumph.

“Amazing,” he chirps happily, gently patting his stomach, absolutely glowing.

“Thank you, you’re too kind.” you blush at his praise and stand up, clearing your throat before speaking.

“I should get going; I’ll see you around, Bucky,” you say, gently squeezing his arm.

“Yeah, hope I can see you again.” He says slowly, hoping you pick up his suggestion; you walk across the hallway, giving one last smile before closing the door.

It’s been a week since you gave him your pot pie. Every meal you’ve made, you wanted to provide some, but you didn’t wanna weird him out

It was raining, too, so you decided it was a good day for some classic French onion soup, only this time, you wouldn’t bring your leftovers; you would have dinner with Bucky. You are dressed in a yellow floral print dress that landed just above the knees. Giving yourself one last look in the mirror before walking across the hall, you gently knock on the door.

“I’m coming!” Bucky shouts, and you faintly hear footsteps coming closer. Bucky quickly swings the door open.

“Oh, Y/N! Hey, whatcha got there?” Bucky asks, looking down at the pot you have in your hands.

“French onion soup,” you say proudly, holding your head high. “With a baguette,” you added happily.

“Hell yeah! Come in, come in,” he says excitedly, stepping aside.

You pour yourself and Bucky, as he waits excitedly, absolutely beaming, gently place the bowl before him and hand him a few slices of baguette.

“I hope you like it,” you smile nervously; you sit next to Bucky, wiping your sweat palms on your dress.

“This looks amazing, Y/N,” he says, smiling down at the food, picking up a spoonful of soup, and blowing on it before eating.

“Oh my god,” he says as soon as it hits the palate, Concern growing deep in your chest. “He hates it, oh my god,” you say to yourself.

“Y-you don’t like it?” You ask timidly, pulling his bowl away from him, shame feeling every part of your body, “this was a stupid idea,” you say under your breath, but loud enough that Bucky hears you; he grabs the hand, pulling away tightly, you gasp; looking up at Bucky nervously

“Don’t say that,” he said firmly, realizing he was still holding your hand; he cleared his throat and let your hand go.

“I just mean it’s good, better than good; it’s incredible,” he admits cautiously, reaching for another spoonful.

“Oh, haha,” you laugh, feeling the tension melt away.

Bucky wastes no time scarfing down the food, and of course, going back for seconds, you smile to yourself, pleased with his reactions.

“Ugh, that was marvelous,” he said, rubbing his belly happily; you both sat on the sofa in comfortable silence. You remember when you first built up the courage to offer him your leftovers; you never imagined it would lead to this: having dinner with your handsome neighbor.

“Do you wanna make dinner at my place next week?” you asked suddenly before you changed your mind.

“I’d love to.” Bucky smiled back at you.

#marvel fluff #marvel x reader #marvel #bucky barnes #bucky fluff #bucky fanfic #bucky x female reader #bucky x reader fluff #bucky barnes au #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky barnes fic #bucky x y/n #bucky drabble #bucky barnes blurb #bucky and reader #bucky barnes and reader #bucky barnes fluff #jennys.work

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jamie-leah · 10 months

Text

Text You

Bucky x Reader

Oneshot

Summary: You like texting Bucky in the middle of the night, slowly getting to know him and slowly falling in love.

Word Count: 2989

Warnings: Mentions of violence and blood. Not edited.

A/N: Here’s a little something I put together. Please ignore the time shown in the text pictures, I do not possess the skills to change it. All interaction is very much appreciated <3

Masterlist

Bucky was still adjusting to life now that things had gone back to normal. Or as normal as they could be.

He had taken his time getting back to normal. Only recently moving into his own place and taking on a few missions.

You had taken an immediate liking to Bucky; it was plain to see by everyone. You were the sunshine to Bucky’s rain, and you always took it upon yourself to make him feel included and welcomed. You wanted him to feel part of the team, part of the family.

So, when you had gotten his number after months and months of nagging, you knew it was game over for him.

The first time you text Bucky he frowned into the darkness. His phone lightly buzzing on his nightstand. He rolls over to see the alarm clock blinking the numbers 1.58. His frown creases to worry as he picks up the phone, swiping to unlock the message that he can now see is from you.

Bucky does nothing but sigh throughout the whole exchange. All he wants is to be left alone. But before his last message he reads over the exchange. A seed of guilt starting to blossom in his chest, making it tighter. After reading it over and over and arguing with himself in the dark, he adds the cat comment.

The next day Bucky is making coffee, eyes still blurry from sleep, when a knock echoes through the apartment. He wanders over to the door, not bothering to check who it is when he yanks it open, scowl at the ready.

You stand there, smile beaming already which falters when your eyes travel down the expanse of exposed flesh, all ripples, scars and muscles. But you recover quickly when the white ball of fluff starts to wriggle in your arms.

Bucky rubs at his eyes three times to make sure he’s seeing what is right in front of him. You with eyes bright and the cheekiest smile he’s seen from you yet, holding a young white cat in your arms.

“I saw this little guy in a shelter, and he looked lonely. I thought you two would get on amazingly.” You state.

Bucky can feel his jaw unhinge but can’t do anything to stop it. A few sputtered words slip out until he remembers your phone conversation, the only time he mentioned liking cats.

Bucky starts to shake his head, which you diligently ignore, “his name is Alpine, he’s two, and adorable.”

“I don’t think-“

“So, you’ll have to pick up some food for him, but I can always do that if you just want to spend time with the little guy.”

Bucky continues the head shaking, “this is a terrible-“

You thrust Alpine into Bucky’s arms effectively cutting him off as he automatically cradles the white ball of fluff to his chest.

You give a wave to them both, “have fun guys, I’ll text you later!”

Bucky looks down as Alpine meows in his arms.

He expects the pings now, they don’t worry him like they used to. Having his phone go off in the middle of the night was the norm now. And though Bucky would never admit it to anyone, he was grateful sometimes for the distraction on the nights he couldn’t sleep.

When he sees your first message, he isn’t surprised of the topic. Halloween is tomorrow after all, and you had been talking about what outfit to wear for ages.

It was true, Bucky could never sleep past five, even though he wished he could. Of course, he shouldn’t have been surprised when there was a knock on the door just after five in the morning.

Bucky makes his way to the door, Alpine trotting in front. When he opens the door, you’re standing there with two cups of coffee to go, and a dozen bags.

You look down at Alpine weaving between your legs and smile, “Hi Alpine, how’re you loving your new home?”

Bucky watched you. He wondered why you were trying so hard, why you wanted to be around him so much. He wondered why you were putting in so much effort for someone like him. He was also wondering when you got so beautiful with a smile that bright.

You hand him one of the coffee cups, “black with three sugars, I remembered and no it’s not poisoned.”

You grab a few bags and pass them to Bucky and his spare hand, “help with these and I’ll get the rest.”

Bucky complies as you push him into his apartment, “uh, what is all this?”

You shrug, “just a few decorations for tonight.”

Bucky’s features screw up, “decorations?”

You start looking through the bags, “yeah, for Halloween.”

“I don’t- Wait, tonight? What’s happening tonight?” Trepidation clear in his voice.

You shrug again, “just a get together.”

“I swear to god, if you’ve organised a party-“

You wave at him to stop, “its not a party. It was my turn to organise the Halloween party and much to Tony’s dismay, I said it was just going to be us guys.”

Bucky eyes you with suspicion, “and why are you doing it in my apartment?”

You roll your eyes like it’s obvious, “because if I had done it at mine or anyone else’s you would not have shown up.”

Bucky sighs. He looks down at Alpine rubbing against his leg. He can’t dispute what you said, it is exactly what he would have done.

Bucky gives in. Something he is doing more and more with you lately. He’s not sure if its your persistence or your smile. He’s not sure he cares.

By the time you both finish, the apartment is transformed. Cobwebs are hanging from the ceiling, pumpkins are flickering on every ledge, a witch’s cauldron is the bowl for the punch.

With two bags left, Bucky wasn’t sure what there was left to decorate. You hand him one bag, “this is your outfit.”

Bucky peeks inside, “no.”

You start to speak but Bucky cuts you off, “I said no. I don’t even know where you got this from.”

“It’s the original. It’s yours.”

Bucky looks away from the bag, “doesn’t matter. I’m still not wearing it.”

“Look, I’m not going to force you to do anything you don’t want to do. There’s a generic costume underneath that one in the bag. I just wanted you to feel like the man we all see you as.”

You leave him to it, retreating to the bathroom with your own bag to get changed. Bucky heads to his bedroom. Closing the door and staring at himself in the mirror on the back of the door.

Bucky thinks over your words ‘the man we all see you as’. What do they all see him as? Who do you see him as? Secretly, Bucky was burning to know how you saw him, both afraid and hopeful that maybe you see him as someone worth it. Because Bucky wasn’t going to dress up for Halloween, he thought he was already monster enough.

He got the outfit out and laid it across his bed, leaving the alternative you spoke about without even looking at it. He stares at the outfit in front of him for ages, until his door starts knocking and he can hear you talking to the team.

He hears the music flood his apartment by the time he decides what to wear. Everyone is chatting away when he makes his way down the hallway, heart straining against his ribcage. The talking stops when he finally steps into the room.

Bucky looks for familiar eyes, landing on Steve smiling at him already, “hey! You decided to wear it. I always wanted to wear the uniform with you back then.”

That’s when he realises Steve has the same army uniform. He breathes a little easier knowing he doesn’t stick out as much.

He finds your eyes next. The light behind them the brightest he’s ever seen, “I can see why you were so popular with the ladies.”

The wink makes him cough and look away. When he looks back to you, he frowns, “where is your outfit?”

You flash him a knowing smile as you pull a white sheet on, “a spooky ghost!”

Bucky chuckles as he remembers your questions about ghosts last night. And it was the first time he truly felt grateful to you for pushing him out of his comfort zone. It turned out to be one of the best nights of his life. The laughing, the dancing and you, all in one evening.

Bucky watches the ceiling light up as his phone buzzes on the side table next to him. He picks it up fully expecting your words to greet him.

Of course, Bucky eventually gives into you. He always does. He replies with his favourite flavour much later though and doesn’t hear from you until you appear at his door at lunchtime.

“Get your jacket, we have a little mission to complete.”

Bucky doesn’t hesitate, grabbing his leather jacket and following you out of his apartment building, “what’s the assignment?”

You gesture to a building a ways up, “there’s a meeting taking place at a dessert parlour. There was some intelligence to suggest that one of them was an old Hydra agent.”

Bucky nods his understanding. It takes another few minutes to reach the building. You walk straight in and settle in a booth in the corner. Bucky takes the seat opposite you, discretely checking the place out.

When the waitress comes over, Bucky almost tells her to go away but you beat him to it, “we’ll take a mint choc sundae to share please.”

Bucky gives you a look once the waitress leaves and you just shrug, “we have to make it look like we’re here for the dessert and not to spy on people.”

Bucky concedes your point but never lets his guard down. His eyes always travelling to the door when the bell dings at the arrival of someone new.

When the ice cream arrives, you try to hand him a spoon, but he refuses. You slide the spoon across to him, “relax Bucky and eat the ice cream with me.”

“Relax? We’re on a mission, I can’t relax.”

You scrap your spoon across the top of the ice cream, “we’re not on a mission Buck.”

He looks at you sharply, “what?”

You speak around the freezing goodness, “I made it up.”

Bucky turns to face you fully, “you did what? What would you do that for?!”

You give him ‘that’ look, “because I wanted to eat some ice cream with you, and I knew you never would have come with me if I had asked.”

Bucky’s mouth opens and closes like a goldfish for a few seconds. He finally snaps it shut, picking up the spoon and stabbing the ice cream with it, mumbling under his breath the entire time.

Bucky eventually comes to the realisation that he should never doubt you. You both have so much fun that you order another two sundaes to share.

It’s the same old story. Bucky is staring into the void when the darkness lights up as a text from you awaits to greet him.

Bucky turns to grab it and swipes to read your message.

Bucky shoots out of bed grabbing his clothes while trying to ring you. It rings out and he curses. He runs into the hallway and throws his boots on, calling Steve.

Steve picks up after three long rings, “hello? Buck?”

“Steve, Steve listen to me, where was that mission taking place tonight?”

“Mission?” Steve mumbles.

“The one that Y/N was on, is on right now!”

“It was just some stake out job, in some industrial building-“

Bucky starts running to the outskirts of town, “no, Steve, listen to me! I need an exact address and I need it now.”

Steve becomes more alert, “I’ll text you the address now.”

When the text comes through Bucky takes off, people, cars and lights blurring together. His only thought is you, getting to you in time. He has to get to you in time.

Another text comes through, the buzzing in his hand like an electric shock. He looks down to see a text from Steve again, pinging your location to Bucky.

When Bucky gets to the building everything is quiet. There doesn’t seem to be anyone around, but he draws his gun just in case and while he doesn’t want to give his position away if there are people there, you’re more important.

“Y/N?” Bucky shouts into the building, his voice echoing through the empty space.

He calls again and strains to listen. There. He hears your groan. If it weren’t for his enhanced abilities, he probably would have missed it.

He finds you squeezed into a corner, obviously hiding from whoever did this to you. Blood is running like a river from your wound, your hand placed over it but no pressure being applied.

He falls to his knees, grabbing your face, “hey, hey! Open your eyes for me sweetheart, I need to know you’re still awake.”

You groan but your eyes seem glued shut. Bucky pushes your hand away, bringing pressure to your wound.

Your eyes spring open, a scream tearing from your throat. Inky blackness hovering on the edges of your vision but you make him out, you see Bucky like the king of hell with your vision darkening and his hair in disarray.

“Bucky.”

His eyes meet yours, “yes, keep your eyes open for me. I’m here, I’m gonna take care of you.”

Bucky takes one hand away to grab his phone. It slips out of his hand a couple times, blood smearing the keyboard. Bucky finally gets the keypad up and dials Steve.

Your eyes droop, blood roaring in your ears. You can just make out Bucky’s lips moving but not sure what he’s saying. You let your eyes shut again.

“NO! You have to stay with me, stay awake. Help is coming and you’re going to be fine, you’ll be fine.”

Your eyes won’t comply, the darkness too warm to leave but you smile at hearing Bucky’s voice. “I’m really glad you’re here.” You manage to cough the words out.

Bucky pushes harder on your wound, but it only elicits a groan between your wheezing breaths, “I always answer your texts, don’t I?”

“If it had to be anyone, I’m glad its you.”

Bucky wasn’t sure you were making sense, but he was just grateful that you were still here with him, talking.

“So, when are you taking me out on another ice cream date?” Bucky asks.

You don’t answer. It was one of the only moments in Bucky’s long life that he was truly afraid. He pushes harder, blood still pouring through the gaps in his fingers. But no groan or protest makes it passed the lips he’s wanted to kiss for a while now.

Bucky keeps saying your name repeatedly. He continues to say it even when the others arrive with help. No matter how loud or soft or panicked he says your name, your eyes never do open again.

Bucky is staring at the ceiling, counting the tiles like one would count sheep to fall asleep. He hadn’t left the hospital since you arrived. He had been sleeping in the chair for days now or trying to at least.

The nurses took pity on him and guided him to an empty room with a hospital bed. They had insisted and Bucky wanted to show his gratitude, so he had accepted.

He knew he would never be able to sleep though. His whole body ached but it was coiled like a spring, just waiting for your eyes to open again. He found himself waiting for his phone to beep at him with a text from you in the middle of the night. But his phone was eerily silent every night.

He couldn’t remember the last time he missed someone so much. His eyes eventually close, your bright eyes and mega watt smile haunting him in his dreams.

*Buzzz* *Buzzz*

Bucky groans. His hand snakes out to swipe his phone from the table next to him. His eyes watering at the brightness of the screen in front of him.

Bucky falls out of the hospital bed. The hard floor leaves him breathless for a moment, the phone clattering away from him. He leaves it there, his feet already hitting the plastic tiles. Bucky weaves through the patients and staff until he bursts through the door leading to your room.

He sees you, your eyes tired but alive, your phone lighting up your pale face as you look up. Bucky stares at the corners of your mouth turning up in a soft smile and he struggles to hold back the tears of relief that he hadn’t missed his chance to see that face light up again.

You put the phone down and open your arms out to him. Bucky falls into your embrace, and you let out an ‘oomph’ to which he softly apologises in your ear without letting you go.

You’re not sure how long you stay that way when you finally pull back, mouth open to make some lame joke. Bucky stops those plans when he brings his lips to yours in a bruising kiss. His lips desperate to feel you.

When the kiss breaks, you smile, “I hadn’t even said yes to that second date yet.”

Bucky brings his lips back to yours, gentle this time, like they knew yours was made for his and he knew you weren’t going anywhere. His teeth grazing your plump bottom lip just as he pulls back.

Your eyes stay closed a few seconds longer as you breathe out, “yes”. Yes, to the second date, yes to Bucky, yes to a future with both of you in it.

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evanstanwrites · 10 months

Text

Lost love, broken trust

Pairing: Biker AU Bucky x Reader warnings: nervous Bucky, fluff, little bit of smut (not really described in detail), Bucky’s father, angst sum: Bucky and Y/n navigate their unspoken attraction for each other. A/n: special thanks to @qrjung and @thescarletphoenixx for helping me out with this story both as beta readers as editing and helping me with ideas <3

series masterlist

Growing up together in Brooklyn, Bucky, Y/N and Steve had found it easy to become friends. They all lived relatively close to each other and Bucky’s and Steve's father's were friends—Bucky's father was the president of Brooklyn's notorious motorcycle club 'The Iron Fist' and wielded much power and influence. Steve's father, a devoted and trustworthy friend, operated as his vice president.

The trio spent their days together, laughing at each other's jokes and pranks.

Everyone knew them. They were always joined at the hip and where one was, it was very likely the other two would be nearby.

But beneath Bucky and y/n's friendship, a strong, unspoken affection developed.

It was harder to put a name to what they felt for each other when they were little children. Y/N didn't understand what the fuzzy feeling in her heart meant or why being around Bucky made her feel safer than she had ever been.

All she knew was that Bucky was her best friend and she was happy around him.

And for a while, that was all that mattered.

But as the years moved on, it became more and more obvious that she liked him beyond their platonic friendliness.

She started to imagine what it would be like if they were together —if Bucky felt the same way about her as she did for him.

When Bucky and Steve both hit 18, their fathers had pulled them aside and explained what it meant to be a part of the MC. Of course, both of them already had an idea, they had been around the big group of bikers many times before and had seen plenty of things that went on at the clubhouse. Bucky’s father had always been clear on his expectations for his future, he wanted his son to take over the president patch one day. And so when they were old enough they both started their prospect time.

Y/n wasn’t really that excited for them but she knew it was coming, both Bucky and Steve grew up in that kind of environment and adored their bikes so she supported their choice. She knew it could be dangerous in the future but she also believed that Bucky would make sure nothing would ever happen to her.

***

Bucky waited for Y/n to lock up her car as he leaned against his bike that was parked in the spot next to her. It had become a routine for them to meet up every Saturday morning and have breakfast together. It was one of the only moments where Steve didn’t join them.

“So…" he started once she reached him. "You might already know but there is a party at the clubhouse tonight.”

He fumbled with his fingers and got up from his bike, leading them both towards the small diner.

“Like every Saturday evening,” he added with a soft chuckle. He could slap himself, why did he have to act so nervous when he was around her? Most of the time he could hide the feeling but this was different, he was about to ask her out, ask her to be his date, at least that was the plan.

Y/n noticed Bucky acting a bit out of the ordinary but she wrote it off as the stress that came with being a prospect so she didn’t say anything about it. As every time Bucky held the door open for her and walked to their usual booth with his hand on the small of her back.

As soon as they sat down a waitress walked up to them and asked if they wanted their usual, which they agreed to.

“So the party,” Y/n picked up where Bucky had left off.

“Yeah, I wondered if you wanted to come. I can pick you up, you can crash at my place or I can drop you off back home after. Really, it depends on what you want. You don't even have to—"

“Bucky,’ she cut him off and placed one of her hands over his and gave him a smile. " I'll be there but you know it won’t be a good idea if you give me a ride home, you’re a prospect. There is a very big chance that you’ll end up drunk or being called away to someone's dirty work.” she chuckled. She didn’t blame him for it, she knew how it went in that life. Her response made him laugh.

“ Why are you always so right, doll?”

“Well one of us has to be the smart one," she joked

That was how the rest of the morning went, light banter laced with a little bit flirting.

It was only when Bucky was on his way to the clubhouse after the both of them had said ‘see you soon’ that he realized that he had forgotten to make it clear to her that he was asking her to be his date. But maybe that was the reason that he had to be sure to tell her how he felt later that night, he had to make her his girl officially.

***

The party took place in the darkly lit clubhouse overflowing with chattering men and the scent of leather and beer.

Bucky's heart raced as he stood in a dimly lit corner of the party, trying to summon enough courage to express to Y/N what he was feeling. The music's steady beat seemed to mirror the beat of his heart, reflecting the anticipation growing within him.

He noticed Y/N across the room, her brilliant smile lighting up the place. Her laughter blended with the cheerful conversation of the crowd, drawing him in with an irresistible pull. Bucky took a deep breath, pushed his nerves aside, and walked towards her.

The world around him seemed to slip away as he neared, leaving the two of them in their own bubble. Y/N's eyes met his, her look warm and curious. The sound of his own heartbeat drowned out the commotion of the party, heightening the emotion of the moment.

Bucky's voice quivered slightly as he found the strength to begin.

"Y/N, there's something I need to tell you," he began, his words softly spoken as he shifted on his feet trying to hide his nervousness.

He could practically feel the drops of sweat forming on his forehead. This was the moment he’d been waiting on for years, he couldn’t fuck it up right now.

“This isn’t an easy thing to say, '' he said, unable to keep eye contact with her, choosing instead to focus on a spot behind her shoulder.

''It's okay, Buck," she smiled reassuringly and Bucky felt his heart stutter. She was so perfect. "Take all the time you need. I’m not going anywhere.”

Bucky nodded and took a deep breath. "I've been suppressing these emotions for so long, afraid to show them. But I can't hide them any longer." He said faster than usual so he couldn’t hesitate anymore, he had to finish what he started.

Y/N's look was a mix of astonishment and fascination, so he went on. Bucky's hands, which were usually so steady, shook with his nerves as he reached out to lightly touch her arm, the brief contact sending shivers down his spine.

"Y/N, you mean more to me than words can express," he said, his voice filled with honest sincerity. "You're my best friend, but it's grown into so much more. I've fallen head over heels for you, and it scares me because I can't picture my life without you."

Y/N stayed silent as she digested his confession, her eyes searching for any traces of hesitation or doubt in his.was the real? Did he really just tell her that he was in love with her? Bucky's heart felt like it was about to explode as she stayed silent, his vulnerability displayed in front of her. But the longer it lasted the more Bucky started to panic, did he blow it? Was he about to lose her?

Y/N snapped out of her daze when she noticed that Bucky started to panic, she couldn’t have him thinking that she didn’t feel the same. So instead of thinking she just handled it.

A soft smile pulled at the edges of Y/N's lips, her eyes gleaming with a mix of emotions just before she jumped at Bucky to hug him "Bucky," she said quietly, her voice soft. "I can't deny that I've fallen for you, too."

Bucky felt a rush of happiness as the weight of uncertainty lifted from his shoulders. The world around them appeared to melt into the background, leaving only the two of them.

Bucky and Y/N found peace in each other's arms, their smiles mirroring their mutual devotion, the world beyond their embrace forgotten. As their lips met in a passionate kiss, establishing their unspoken desires, their friendship blossomed into something beautiful and profound.

They submitted to their desires, consumed by their overwhelming feelings. Bucky guided Y/N into one of the storage rooms in the back where he lifted her up onto the desk that stood against the wall.

Y/N's breaths became deeper once Bucky’s lips connected with the skin of her neck and softly kissed his way to her collarbone. The only thing y/n could do was wave her fingers into the soft dark locks of the biker and hold on for dear life.

“I have dreamt of this day for so long, I can’t get enough of your lips,” Bucky said, hovering his lips over hers.

“Shut up and just make love to me, Buck,” she chuckled, making Bucky freeze.

“Are you sure? We don’t have to right now, I can take you out to somewhere nice. I want this to be special for you.” Bucky’s words made her love him even more.

“Being with you for the first time is special enough, I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

That was all that he needed to hear before he pulled her back in for a kiss. He made sure that it was just as pleasurable for her as it was for him. He knew for sure that his knees would hate him the next day after kneeling on the cold concrete floor so he could pleasure his girl with his tongue. He didn’t want her to reciprocate the action claiming “I need to be inside you baby, need to feel you. We have all the time in the world later.”

If Y/N had to describe the moment she’d say that it was almost like she was in heaven. She had so many people say that it was the worst experience, but it was nothing like that for her. Yes the first moment that he pushed inside of her had stung but Bucky had been an absolute gentleman and gave her all the time she needed to adjust. And in no time the both of them were a moaning mess as they both reached their peaks.

Their blissful moment, however, was brutally cut short when they returned to the bar. Bucky received an important call, taking him away from Y/N's side. Duty called, and he had no choice but to leave her at the bar, leaving their budding love story hanging in its wake.

Y/N sat at the bar, her pulse still pounding from the intimate confession and stolen moments with Bucky. The dim lights created a gloomy atmosphere around her, the air was thick with anticipation. Little did she know that a storm was gathering in the form of Bucky's father, the intimidating president of the Iron Fist charter.

Bucky's father approached Y/N with a terrifying presence. His eyes were icy and penetrated into her soul, as a menacing smirk danced across his lips. It was evident that he had no intention of being kind or understanding.

"Y/N, isn't it?" he asked, his voice full of resentment. “It's such a shame that my son has become involved with someone like you. You're far too good, far too pure for him." His words were loaded with malice, each syllable a cold blade piercing Y/N's soft heart.

He leaned in closer, his commanding figure casting a shadow over her. "Let me make something abundantly clear," he snarled, his voice barely audible above a whisper. "Bucky doesn't care about you. He never did. You are only a toy, a tool to fulfill his desires."

Y/N's eyes widened in disbelief and agony, her heart breaking with each word from his lips. Her eyes welled up with tears, but she refused to cry. She drew every ounce of strength she could manage to face this wave of cruelty.

Bucky's father went on, his voice oozing with cruel satisfaction. "Do you think you can fit into our world? You are a liability, a weak link that jeopardizes our reputation. I promise you, if you ever cross paths with Bucky again, the consequences will be severe."

He waited for a minute, reveling in the terror and desperation that clung to Y/N's every breath. "Leave town, Y/N," he said, his voice a terrifying whisper. "Disappear and never come back. You are not welcome here, and I will not hesitate to make it clear to you."

His threats and manipulation weighed heavily on Y/N's frail heart. She felt trapped, hemmed in by Bucky's father's hatred and the smothering terror of the unknown. Their hopes had crumbled into a million pieces of broken promises, leaving her with nothing but anguish and despair.

Y/N found herself at a crossroads of fear and unpredictability, overwhelmed and sad. Bucky's father threatened her with grave repercussions if she returned, portraying a dismal image of the future. Fear drove her to make the painful decision to leave town, leaving behind the memories of their stolen moments and shattered dreams. And without speaking a word she turned her back to the older man and walked out of the clubhouse.

Bucky's father reveled in his victory at the time. The cruelty he had unleashed was planned, his manipulation a weapon that tore apart Bucky and Y/N's flourishing love.

Y/N changed her phone number, cutting the last link between her and her past. She only had finals left do before she graduated from uni but that was something she could easily do online. With a heavy heart, she embarked on a journey to rebuild her life, tormented by the memories of a love that could have been.

#Bucky Barnes #biker bucky #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes au #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes fic #sebastian x reader #the winter soldier #bucky and reader #Bucky angst #bucky fluff #bucky x y/n

244 notes · View notes

bi-disaster-yn · 2 years

Text

Vital Organs

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Summary: Reader is in love with her best friend, Bucky. The feeling is mutual but having a troubled relationship with her father means that she’s scared to risk the heartbreak.

A/N: I MAY have cried while writing this. To all the girls who, like me, have shitty dads and derive a lot of comfort from Bucky - I’m dedicating this to you. We deserved better.

“Do ya think you’d ever go on a date with me?”

Bucky’s words echoed in your brain, sending a sharp pain in your chest with each repetition. The quietness in the jet only increased the agony of that moment being replayed. Your best friend had stood before you and put his emotions on the line - something he had never afforded himself to do. Then you made him realise why.

Two of your ribs were fractured from the mission but that thought was more painful.

“So quiet, what are you thinking about?” Yelena commented, looking over her shoulder from her pilot duties to check up on you.

“Nothing.” You replied putting your hand over your ribs and resting your back against the seat.

Bucky was going to be so worried when he’d found out you’d been injured. You could see it now, him following you around like a puppy. At least, he might have done if you’d given him a better answer than ‘I don’t know’ to a date. When you left for the mission he had worn a wounded expression that he’d desperately tried to conceal as you told him goodbye.

The truth is, when Bucky had asked you that question it threw your body into a complete state of conflict.

Your heart was about to burst out of your chest, as if it was trying to escape and connect with Bucky’s. It was crying out for you to say yes to him and take everything you had ever wanted.

That was until your brain stepped in and lassoed your heart to keep it in its place. The logic had corrupted you and was determined to prevent you from getting hurt. It wore you down and drowned out the excitement of your heart. It went to work in bringing back all the disappointment and hurt caused by your father who had left you behind at an early age.

But your lungs burned. The air was trapped in them and you struggled to breathe. It felt like you were being suffocated. It was a curious and familiar feeling from when you were younger.

To be the daughter of a man who abandons you is to constantly hold your breath in fear that if you let go, you’ll fall apart.

The other organs had overpowered and barricaded your lonely heart. They left you in the predicament of stuttering and stammering in front of a very nervous Bucky which had concluded with your pathetic answer. The memory had plagued you ever since.

Simultaneously, your brain provided you with flashbacks of being a child and waiting excitedly for a a man that rarely ever came. The feeling of disappointment after every interaction with your father that somehow managed to make you feel so unimportant had returned. The lump in your throat held there with every breath reminded you of the struggle to accept that he was never going to be what you needed to him to be.

It had taken some bone-crushing strength to move on. He was your father and you needed him to be better. As his child, you believed you should be the only motivation he needed to stop being so unreliable and grow up.

Whilst you were right, that is unfortunately not how the world works.

Now the perfect man had asked you the question you deemed was only possible in your wildest dreams. But to say yes to him was to give him access to potentially do the exact same thing as your father had done.

It was just too much of a risk.

The jet had landed with a halt and Yelena came over to assist you with walking off. You were quietly grateful for her, trying to hide just how much pain in you were in as you grasped Yelena’s shoulder.

Sam was poised and waiting for you both. Bucky stood next to him, fidgeting anxiously in anticipation of your return. He had spent the last few days licking his wounds in your absence. He had accepted that you had only ever been so affectionate with him because you were a good friend and he’d misinterpreted it. It fucking stung, but he respected that you can’t help how you feel. Although your answer had left him unsure where he stood with you, he was eager for you to return so he could be the best friend you needed him to be.

Bucky’s face fell as his eyes landed on Yelena holding you up with your arm round her shoulders and your regular wincing.

“First of all, are you okay?” Sam asked, him and Bucky instinctively making their way over to you both, ready to take you from Yelena if need be.

“Yeah, just fractured some ribs. No biggie.” You joked but it sounded painful. You could feel Bucky’s eyes on you, scanning and analysing you, processing the possibilities if this had been worse.

It made you feel weak and incompetent. The strong super soldier wanted to protect you and all you could think about is that you wished you were stronger. All of those years of having to establish your independence and leave behind weakness and vulnerability were completely discarded in that moment with Bucky’s pitiful look.

“Okay well, get checked out. No training or missions for you until you’re better.” Sam instructed, having settled into his new role as Captain America; he needed to make sure his team were in the best shape possible.

“Got it, Cap.” You nodded at Yelena to get her to take you to the medical wing of the compound. That was when Bucky stepped in.

“I’ll take it from here, Yelena.” He said and before you could even say anything, you were scooped up into Bucky’s arms and he was carrying into the compound.

“I could have walked.” You protested meekly. Being in his arms felt awkward, you didn’t allow yourself to hold on to him because then you’d stop holding your breath and you’d be done for.

“This is easier.” He retorted. For the first time since Bucky had started his recovery, he was unable to look you in the eye.

It was stony silence between you both, each of you having moments to open your mouths but no words came out. Nothing felt right. Despite being in his arms, a gap had been wedged between you and you were unsure how you’d ever be able to get back to him again.

You fixated on Bucky’s jaw which was constantly clenched, you could just about feel his teeth grinding together. His slouched shoulders and defeated expression didn’t go unnoticed by you. He was your best friend, you knew everything about him. Bucky was heartbroken.

Heartbroken, yet he still showed up for you when you needed him.

It was now a requirement that the compound had medical staff on hand at all times. Pepper had insisted on it in the rebuild, too many people had been lost. More preventative measures were put in place to keep the team as safe as possible.

You were thankful that you didn’t have to go to hospital but it now meant that Bucky was glued to your side as you were checked over. He was sitting on the edge of his seat, digesting everything the doctor had said to you while you lay back wishing he would go away.

Bucky being there was a constant reminder that you’d hurt him. Locked inside its cage, your heart wept at the thought, desperate for you to tell Bucky you’d been stupid and you’d love to date him, marry him, die for him.

It made your lungs tighten and your breath hitch, ready to give way. You had to be stronger than this. Love was not worth risking the pain of being abandoned. You had vowed never to give anyone the power to make you feel that way again.

When the doctor left, Bucky settled back into his chair, clearly having no intention of leaving. You settled down on the bed, feeling drowsy from the painkillers and squeezed your eyes shut like a child, wishing that when you opened them that he’d be gone.

Alas, moments later when you opened your eyes again he was still there, watching over you protectively.

“You don’t need to sit with me, Buck. I’m sure you’ve got better things to be doing.” You mumbled, looking away from him to stare out of the window.

“I am not leaving your side, need to make sure you’re okay.” Bucky responded. “And I missed you.”

His voice broke a little at the last four words, almost as though he was scared to admit it to you. It wasn’t like you were a stranger to his vulnerability but this felt different after him admitting to having feelings a few days prior. It made you frown.

“I missed you too.” You muttered. “I’m sorry about the other day.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” Bucky said defensively and definitively as though he didn’t want to talk about it. He was ready to pretend it didn’t happen and move forward as your friend.

But Bucky deserved the whole world. The least you could do is offer an explanation.

“No, Bucky, you deserve better than an ‘I don’t know’. In all honesty, you’re… perfect. And I’ve loved you for a long time. The way my heart skipped a beat when you asked me that question, you have no idea. But I just can’t…”

“Why?” Bucky choked out, his voice still broken. He had moved to the edge of his seat again, his eyes constantly darting between you and your fingers which you were anxiously playing with.

“Can’t risk it. I can’t risk being abandoned.”

“I’d never leave you.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” You snapped at him and instantly regretted it as you could sense his posture shrink with the unsolicited harshness. It wasn’t intentional but rather instinctual. Words were empty; if a parent could leave you then there was nothing to stop a boyfriend from doing the same thing.

“You promise me you won’t leave all the time.” Bucky offered after a couple of seconds of uncomfortable silence. He was right, in all of his moments of insecurity and grief after Hydra; it was you providing comfort and reassurance. It was you by his side, being his supportive and loving best friend.

“Because I know how shit it is to be left.” You sighed and felt the painful tug in your chest. Your breathing was rapid and your lungs were aching. They were agonisingly trying to keep everything in; keeping your heart locked up and holding your breath. You’d come too far, you couldn’t let go now.

“And you think I don’t?” It was Bucky’s turn to snap now.

His words were a cruel and embarrassing wake up call. It prompted you to give him eye contact and fuck, he really was broken.

It was so insensitive: you should have known better than that. Steve leaving him behind had had a profound effect on Bucky. Rarely did he ever let people see his tears but he had allowed you to cradle him like a baby while he sobbed for his friend who had left him behind.

“Buck, I’m so sorry.” You mumbled, feeling like a fool with your carelessness. Twice now had the tight leash you had kept on your lungs resulted in your words hurting Bucky. It was becoming more than you could bear.

Bucky shook his head lightly, waving off the comment and wiping the slate clean again. Nonetheless, he held your eye contact in search of further elaboration.

“It’s just I used to get all that crap from my dad about never leaving me and he did. It means nothing to me anymore. What if I’m not enough for you like I wasn’t for him?” Tears has trickled from the corners of your eyes and spilled down on to your face and the sheets.

Bucky wasted no time in getting up and sitting on the bed next to you, pulling you into his chest. The remaining pieces of the puzzle formed in his head. He had known before that any mention of your dad made you extremely uncomfortable and he had always changed the subject. Bucky understood all too well what it was like to be left behind, but not by a parent. Not by one of the very few people in this world that actually owed you something. He cursed himself for not considering this beforehand but quickly turned his focus to comforting you.

This time you didn’t protest to being taken in Bucky’s arms, you just wept into his t shirt as he stroked your hair and pressed loving kisses to the top of your head. Your brain was too fatigued to provide you with reasons why you should push him away. You just needed him.

“I need to protect my heart.” You asserted finally, trying to explain yourself further.

“Sweets, you’re breaking your own heart.” Bucky sighed as he pulled you in closer to him.

Just as you had cradled him when Steve left, it was his turn to do it for you. Engulfed in those strong arms, he rocked you gently and carefully. It felt safe and warm and like home.

Now that your brain had called surrender on this pointless fight against your feelings for Bucky, it played a different film in your head than memories of your dad.

You remembered Bucky teaching you to ride a motorbike. He had put your helmet on for you and let out a hearty laugh at the goofy grin you’d given him. Everything he did that day was with extreme patience as he’d put his hands over yours on the handlebars, explaining what everything was and how it worked. The praise he’d given you when you did something right had encouraged you to keep trying. Conversely, when you got something wrong or made a mistake; Bucky was calm and reassuring, compelling you to try again.

Or the time you’d gotten sick and were bedridden for days. Bucky made it his personal mission to take care of you. He was out of his depth, sure, but he had just tried to mirror what you had done when you comforted him after nightmares. Your cup of tea was never empty, you were never left without enough blankets, you never had to wait for your medicine. Bucky was attentive, caring and there.

Even today, you knew that based on his stoic face that you’d hurt him. But he still turned up for you. He was nothing like your father.

Bucky had proved already that he could be there. He was right: you were breaking your own heart. The trauma of abandonment had caused you to deny yourself a love that felt like home. You had been judge, jury and executioner in your own trial and had made a mistake.

Then it happened. You stopped holding your breath.

Your lungs expanded as fully as possible and then shrunk dramatically again. This process continued over and over as you inhaled as much air as possible and then exhaled in deep, incredible breaths.

“You okay, sweetheart?” Bucky asked, looking down at the powerful heaving of your chest and listening to your breathing.

You nodded in response, unable to offer any words. Without realising, you had clutched on to his t-shirt and balled up a bunch of the fabric in your fist.

It was exhausting after having kept your lungs in tension for so long but it was so liberating to let go safely. Focusing on the thudding of his heartbeat in his chest, it grounded and secured you.

Your own heart was screaming in her cage, knowing her rightful partner was close and she needed to be near him. You had set your brain and lungs free, it was time to do the same for your heart.

With some slow coaxing from Bucky as he rubbed your back and continued to kiss the top of your head, you started to calm down. Your lungs adjusted to regular breathing and seemed content in their new routine of being used the way they should always have been.

Your head was rested on Bucky’s chest, still finding comfort in his regular, clockwork heartbeat. The fabric of his shirt that you had grasped before had been let go and was left wrinkled and misshapen.

“You know, Doll,” Bucky began. “I understand why you feel like that, but I’m not your dad, okay?” He took a moment to look at you and ensure that you weren’t too upset or triggered for him to continue.

“You say you love me, so can you trust me? Can we give this a go?”

You looked up and met the adoring gaze of his ocean eyes. Instead of answering him with words you pressed your lips against his. It was soft and gentle, his flesh hand moving to hold your face. Even with his eyes closed, he’d studied your face enough to know where to run his thumb so it was along your cheekbone.

It was the key to unlocking your caged heart. She leapt from her shackled prison and lunged for Bucky’s heart to connect with him. The hearts embraced with the deepening of your kiss and formed an unbreakable bond.

When you finally pulled back for air - which your lungs were well accustomed to now - you couldn’t help but give each other a chuckle. Your foreheads met as your hearts worked in unison to pull you as close to each other as possible.

“Is that a yes then?” He asked, with a cheeky smile stretched across his face.

The insecurity and fear of being left was still there. You accepted that it always would be on some level. On the other hand, you’d had enough of constantly being on your guard and having to be so strong all the time. No longer would you send your vital organs into mortal combat over an irrelevant man when the man in front of you just wanted to love you.

“Yes.” You decided. “Yes it is.”

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mymoonagedaydream · 10 months

Text

Part 12

Pairing: Biker!Bucky x y/n

Word Count: 2.4k

Warnings: Language, anti-religious sentiment throughout

Author's Note: Final part! Much love!

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11

---

It was gone midnight by the time you and Bucky, both nursing second trimester food babies, spilled out of the restaurant and began to stumble in the vague direction of home. The evening air was chilly but his jacket was wrapped around your shoulders before you’d even begun to feel it. Your hand slotted smoothly into his, a movement that was second nature to you now.

The two of you walked for ten or so minutes when, at an otherwise pretty unremarkable corner, a bolt of inspiration struck you. It was the street name that did it, Cross Street. You remembered seeing it as a child and wondering if this was where your local church and your mother bought all their little wooden crucifixes from. You suddenly knew exactly where you were.

Bucky was heading in one direction but you stopped and tugged him in the other. “We should go this way.”

“Huh? You wanna go the wrong way? How much wine you had?”

“It’s not the wrong way,” he was pulling back against you now, feet firmly planted in place, “it’s just a different, slightly longer way.”

“Longer?

“But worth it.”

“How?"

“I think, uh- I mean, I’m pretty sure there’s a river around here somewhere.” He raised a dubious eyebrow. “Well, eighty percent sure.”

"I'm eighty-five percent sure you're bullshitting me."

"I swear to god I'm not."

"Swear to any imaginary asshole you like. I'm not buying it, sweetheart."

Strong physical resistance was attempted for a few more seconds but, eventually, your very best puppy dog eyes melted him.

“Fine, but if you fall in I’m not coming after you.”

“Deal.”

He gave you a wide smile and snaked an arm around your waist, letting you lead him down the side street. A comfortable silence fell as you turned corner after corner, your face contorting into a smug smile once the water came into view. He just shrugged. The two of you strolled onto a low, stone bridge and watched the ripples distorting the reflections of lit-up apartment windows and orange streetlights. It was gloriously peaceful.

After a minute or so, Bucky turned to carry on walking, but you stayed in place and pulled him back. He stood opposite you, looking a little confused as you took both his hands in yours.

“Buck, what you said earlier, I really think we should talk about it.”

“Nah, it’s alright, it was in the past. Like you said, it's over now and that’s all that matters.”

“What? No, I didn’t mean-” You rubbed your forehead. Christ he was slippery, using your own words against you like that. “That’s not what I meant. If something’s still affecting you, it matters, and it’s good to talk about it.”

He bit at the inside of his cheek and turned his head to stare at the water, eyes combing over the waves. You let him simmer for a little while before bringing your hands up to his face and gently turning it back towards you, raising your eyebrows expectantly. The cold air was whipping harshly off the water and into you but his face was warm and flushed. When he spoke, you could see him carefully considering every word.

“If I keep talking, I might say something that drives you away, and I don’t know if I could take that.”

“That’s not gonna happen.”

“Right, but what if-”

“Buck, I promise there is very, very little that could convince me you’re not a good person, alright? I really don’t care about your past.” You stopped abruptly and frowned at yourself. “That came out wrong.”

He let out a small chuckle. “First you want me to talk about it, now you tell me to shut up?”

“You know what I meant.”

“Mhmm,” he pulled you closer, letting your arms curl around his neck, “I know, baby. I know I can talk to you anytime, you got no idea how much I appreciate that, but if you wanna talk now I'll tell you anything you wanna know. Just ask."

You considered. There definitely had been a few small things you were curious about, the odd interest piquing comment here and there, but for some reason you found yourself completely blanking at his offer. You suddenly realised that you didn't want to know anything. You didn't need to. Maybe just the fact that he was willing to talk was enough.

"Are you happy?"

He chuckled. "Very."

"Then so am I."

"Good."

He shot you a wink, making you giggle like a schoolgirl. You cupped your fingers around his face and brushed your thumbs across his cheeks. The hint of wine on his breath was sweet and warm. Feeling his hands pressed against your back, staring into his still blue eyes, something inside you burst or erupted or… Christ, you weren’t sure, but next thing you knew your mouth was writing a check that you weren’t sure he was ready to cash.

“I love you, Buck.” His face dropped. Fuck it, you were all in now, might as well carry on. “Completely. Like, get a dog together type love. Put up with you stealing the fucking covers all night type love. I’d even go as far as to say-”

He swiftly cut you off by enclosing your half-open, babbling mouth in his, arms squeezing your waist tight. You relaxed completely into him, not sure that you’d be able to stay on your feet if he suddenly let go but too caught up in the moment to care. He pulled away an inch, just for just a second, to whisper.

“I love you too. Just stop talking.”

You weren’t sure how long the two of you stood there, by the river. It was becoming increasingly easy to lose time while you were tangled up with Bucky. The rest of the walk home was a hazy, fragmented mess of staggering for a few minutes before getting distracted and clumsily fumbling at each other. You found yourselves regretting taking the long way, both of you becoming more and more impatient to get back to the privacy of the apartment, and not making it past the floor just inside the door when you did.

But, hey, at least neither of you ended up in the river.

—

You’d found it. The perfect apartment.

It looked small, cramped even, but would be more than enough for just the two of you- neither of you owned any furniture anyway. The beach was only a couple minutes walk away and, with it being a fifth floor apartment, the front window had a beautiful view of the ocean. It even had underground parking, meaning his majesty wouldn’t have to rush to the window to check on his bike every ten minutes. The more you read about it, the more convinced you became that it was meant for you.

Bucky was out at the store when you came across it and you couldn’t stop yourself pacing around excitedly until he got back. You kept refreshing the page, convinced that someone else would snap it up while he was out impulse-buying candy. You practically jumped him as soon as he came through the door, dragging him over to your laptop and squealing excitedly.

After a quick flick through the pictures, he dug his hand into his back pocket.

“It’s ours. What’s the number?”

“I mean, we should probably go see it first, right?”

“Nah. How bad could it be?”

You nodded slowly and wandered your gaze around his flat, lingering on the carpet stains and the patch of mould in the corner. Yep, things were starting to make a little more sense.

He waggled his phone at you. “What’s the hold up?”

Mild pangs of anxiety sparked in your stomach, committing to something this big without properly researching could turn out incredibly badly. The place could be unfinished or falling apart or infested with flesh-eating cockroaches.

Or, you thought, just maybe, it could turn out to be perfect.

A warm smile spread across your face. Maybe it was time to take a page out of his book, stop thinking so much, close your eyes and jump. He smiled back. You gave him the number.

Bucky pressed his lips into your forehead before making the call, the fingers on his left hand tapping excitedly against the table as he made notes with his right. The two of you then spent the next three hours gathering and sending off all of the information and credentials they’d requested.

And then you waited.

And waited.

All evening, checking Bucky’s phone every ten minutes. It was like torture. Nothing had come through by midnight, so the two of you gave up and slunk off to bed, outwardly trying to stay optimistic about finding somewhere else but inwardly pretty disheartened. You’d just have to keep searching.

—

You were woken the next day by the smell of cooking bacon and the sound of Bucky humming to himself in the kitchen. Stretching yourself across the deserted bed, you yawned dramatically and rubbed your eyes, debating how easy it would be to get him to abandon breakfast and curl back up with you. Very easy, probably.

Your hand found your phone on the bedside table and you yanked it from the charger, your head darting up from the pillow in shock when you saw that it was creeping up to midday. How the hell had you managed to sleep for almost twelve hours? Yesterday’s emotional roller coaster must have wiped you out.

Pulling your pyjamas on, you trudged through to the front room and saw Bucky standing over the stove, wiggling his hips along to the jaunty tune he was improvising.

“G’morning.” You walked up beside him, settling into his side as he snaked an arm around you, gazing at the pile of food he was pushing around the pan. “Looks good.”

“Mhmm, this is a real breakfast. I thought we’d celebrate.”

You nodded sleepily, a little confused. “Celebrate what?”

He looked down at you, sporting a wide, knowing smile. Your drowsiness slowly melted away as you realised what he was talking about.

“We got it?”

“We got it.”

Something you could only describe as a kind of throaty yelp noise escaped your mouth, which made Bucky burst out laughing. You threw your arms around his neck, squeezing him as hard as you could, feeling tears welling up in your eyes. A thousand thoughts began racing through your mind but the biggest, brightest one was that you’d finally get some peace. That’s all you really wanted.

When you finally let go of him, he dug his phone out of his pocket and showed you the email from the landlord. Your eyes widened as they scanned through it.

“Wait, this says we move in at the start of next month?”

“Yup.” He nodded proudly.

“Buck, that’s two days from now.”

“Mhmm. We better get packing.”

As it turned out, he’d already hired a van to arrive the next day and picked up a stack of packing boxes while he was out buying breakfast food, all of which he’d hidden behind the couch so they wouldn’t ruin his dramatic reveal. You had no idea who this guy was and what he’d done with Bucky, but you weren’t complaining.

Finally, it felt like things were falling into place.

—

The journey to your new home was about an hour. You had hoped the ride would be relaxing, a chance for catharsis and decompression, but you spent almost the entire time white-knuckled, gripping onto the dashboard. Bucky drove the moving van exactly the same way he drove his motorbike, weaving in and out of traffic like an unbelievably lucky bull in a mercifully generous china shop. He didn’t even seem to notice the sound of all your possessions sliding around chaotically in the back.

When he finally parked up outside the apartment block, you reverted back to religion for the first time in years, thanking both God and the baby Jesus that you survived the drive.

You glanced out of the window. The building wasn’t particularly attractive, sitting in an unremarkable side street opposite a seedy looking off-licence, but you still felt the excitement bubbling in your stomach as you hopped out and properly surveyed your surroundings. It was pretty clean and quiet, the only movement being a young woman with a stroller briskly walking down the opposite sidewalk. A few noisy seagulls flew overhead and you noticed for the first time that you could smell the sea air, fresh and briny. Memories of your day on the beach flooded back. You could get used to that.

Bucky gave you a wide smile and walked towards the door, approaching a man in a cheap suit who you hadn’t even noticed. They talked for a minute, the keys were exchanged and the suit gave you a polite nod before turning and walking down the street. That was, you thought to yourself, quite possibly the only easy interaction you and Bucky had ever had with a third party since you’d been together. You knew life was going to be a whole lot easier after leaving that fucking town, but you certainly hadn’t expected such immediate results. This was incredible.

You grabbed a box and followed your roommate up the stairs, the two of you bursting through the door into your new home.

The first thing you noticed was the view. It was even better in person. You unceremoniously dropped whatever you were carrying and walked towards the window, seeing the vast ocean spread out in both directions as you got closer. Bucky came up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his head on your shoulder.

“Whatta you think?”

“I love it.”

“Eh, it needs a bit of work,” he briefly surveyed the walls and the ceiling, “I think the last people here had dogs, there’s still some-”

You swivelled round in his arms and placed a hand firmly over his mouth, feeling a smile form against your palm. “I don’t care. I love it.”

He mumbled something. You rolled your eyes and released his face, prompting him to repeat himself.

“Me too.”

It took a couple of hours to get everything out of the van and, when you’d finally finished, you found yourselves staring at a messy pile of boxes dumped in the middle of the living room. An unspoken but unanimous decision was made that there was no point starting to unpack before having something to eat, even though you’d spent the entire drive shoving handfuls of chips into each other’s faces.

So, for the first of many times, you and Bucky watched the sunset over the sea. Sitting on cardboard boxes in your cheap flat, eating pretty terrible Chinese food, with nothing in the world but a few dollars and each other.

And it was perfect.

---

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mediocre-daydreams · 2 years

Note

Hey 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

Can I request

“Do you trust me?” “No”

“You flinched”

“because i’m in love with you, isn’t that obvious?”

i've been wanting to write a taylor fic for a while and rep is my all-time favorite album; thus, this mess. i'm not sure how i feel about it tbh i wrote it in two parts and both times i was multitasking so,,, i think the ridiculousness of it all will make up for it

𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞

bucky barnes x avenger! reader

inspired by delicate (not taylor's version, unfortunately)

notes: reader dumb asf, friends to lovers/mutual pining but x10 idiocy factor, literally just crack with a side of *stupid* angst, swearing, brief suggestive language, bucky's actually the worst communicator EVER, natasha and wanda mean well but don't give the best advice (but we love 'em always)

w/c: 4.1k

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

this ain't for the best my reputation's never been worse, so you must like me for me

“this is useless,” bucky complained, flopping himself onto the couch, next to you—which was a bad idea, because the man was 6’3 and nearly 250 pounds. you felt yourself bounce as the cushions sunk under his weight.

“holy- watch where you’re sitting, barnes!” you scrambled back into your previous position, trying to regain your dignity as if you hadn’t just been catapulted simply because of a super soldier sitting down.

“this whole amends thing is bullshit,” he groaned, waving his hands in the air out of frustration. “i mean, i go up to people all sunshine and smiles and i’m like, ‘hi, i’m bucky, i’m here to make amends,’ and then they’re all like, ‘fuck you, asshole!’” he threw his face into his hands and groaned.

you stifled a laugh. “you look like an overgrown toddler right now.” it was true—his bottom lip was jutting out, he was slumped in his seat, and every once in a while he’d sigh or mutter something negative audibly like he was throwing a mini temper tantrum.

“who looks like an overgrown toddler?” natasha rounded the corner and smirked when she saw bucky and his pity party. “oh yeah, i see it.”

bucky rolled his eyes. “this is ridiculous. do you know how sore my cheeks are? i’m trying my fucking best here, and all i got today was glares, a cup of coffee thrown at me, and the middle finger from two grandmas.”

“your own people, turning against you.” you patted bucky’s shoulder reassuringly. “there, there. we’re still here for you.”

“gee, thanks,” he grumbled.

natasha covered her mouth to hide the knowing smile on her face. she was the best spy in the world, but the only thing that could make her break was watching you and bucky interact. neither of you was aware that you were very obviously teetering the line between teammate and soulmate. there was no in between, just a precarious tightrope walk.

“alright, you bums. tony’s hosting another one of his galas-”

“actually, it’s an extravaganza,” tony corrected, sauntering in with his yellow sunglasses perched at the tip of his nose as he checked off items on his holographic pad. “and attendance is mandatory. i will be marking lates and absences.”

tony didn’t even look up from his device when he said, “and yes, barnes, that includes you. consider this a part of your whole… making amends thing.” tony finally looked up from his screen to make intense eye contact with the three of you. “fabulous! i’m glad we’re all on the same page. 7:45 sharp; dress nice.”

with a snap of his fingers and a call for JARVIS, tony was gone as quickly as he had butted in.

natasha grimaced. “right. what i was going to suggest was that bucky takes a plus one. you know. breaking news: winter soldier has a heart! winter soldier, the secret romantic! bucky barnes, giving tony stark a run for his money as the womanizer of the decade?”

bucky looked uncomfortable. “sure…” he dragged out. “yeah, i’ll think about it. thanks a lot, natasha.”

we can’t make any promises now can we, babe? but you can make me a drink

your eyes flickered between the two of them and the thick tension laced in their glares. was this Sexual Tension™? you jumped up from your spot and excused yourself hurriedly, speedwalking to your room at an awkward mid-speed gait.

natasha had basically asked bucky out right in front of your face. great. what were you supposed to do, tell her to fuck off and let you make a fool of yourself in front of bucky? tony’s parties were never your scene anyway; natasha had much more grace and composure. bucky and natasha made sense. they had similar backgrounds, were equally sharp-minded, and admittedly, the both of them were very, very beautiful.

you buried your face into a pillow and screamed. technically, the rooms were soundproof, but it was more dramatic that way. at some point during your toddler-esque fit (bucky was rubbing off on you), you were struck with a brilliant idea. what you needed was a movie-style makeover montage.

you and wanda had always worked together perfectly. it was like you could read each others’ minds. well, wanda literally could, but you could do it…hypothetically? she was more than thrilled to help you get dolled up.

“i have snacks!” wanda squealed, running into your room with bags of gummies and packets of chocolate-covered pomegranate seeds floating behind her. (you had a unique taste in candy, so what?) she wiggled in place as she examined your setup with nothing but pure delight in her eyes.

wanda came up behind you while you were fiddling with your laptop and her enthusiastic but sudden exclamation made you jump. “ohmigosh, are we going to watch the bootleg version of legally blonde the musical? you know me so well,” she swooned, “that’s my favorite broadway production!”

wanda flitted between the various products you’d laid out in your bathroom. you’d prepared it all—an army of nail polish bottles, mountains of glittering jewelry, and heaps and heaps of makeup products that you’d probably never finish in a lifetime.

“bucky is gonna freak when he sees you!” wanda said decisively as she brushed your hair. you examined yourself in the mirror with a frown.

“wan, i’m pretty sure he and natasha are going as a couple.” you fidgeted with a stray piece of hair and wanda grabbed your hand before you could do any more damage to her styling.

“don’t fidget. you only do that when you’re really upset.” wanda sighed, meeting your eyes in the mirror. “i’m sorry, babe. i really thought- well, i’ll just say this is a surprising development for me too. i can’t really promise you anything without totally invading bucky’s bodily autonomy and forcefully and very immorally looking through his private and most intimate thoughts, but i really did- do think you have something there.”

you smiled sadly, unconvinced. “thanks. it doesn’t matter anymore, though. what’s done is done and i’m not going to cry over spilled juice.” you pursed your lips. “even if i really like orange juice…” you huffed.

wanda didn’t correct you. you were already pretty upset.

“hey, chin up a bit! you still get to go to the party with the hottest date ever, me,” she gestured to her body. “and, i mix a mean drink. none of that bartender nonsense. i’ll whip up something way better for us. what d’you say? wanna get totally trashed and embarrass ourselves in front of stuffy businessmen?”

you cracked a smile and looked up at wanda mischievously. “hell yeah. and let’s crack out the kazoos.”

is it cool that i said all that? is it chill that you’re in my head? ‘cause i know that it’s delicate

you were hopping around on one foot, still trying to put on a shoe, as you left your room and crashed into the most delicious-smelling wall you’d ever crashed into.

“bucky?” you squeaked, feeling your face heat up.

“hi, doll.” he smiled down at you fondly and helped you steady yourself before he got on one knee to help you with your shoe. you knew bucky ran warm, but you swore there was a heat in his cheeks too.

“you look b- you are beautiful,” he muttered, just loud enough so you were the only one who could hear it. you gulped, feeling like bucky had suddenly adopted wanda’s abilities to mind read from the way his blue eyes searched your face as if he was admiring art.

“you look okay, i guess.” you poked him in the chest. “c’mon, i’m sure nat’s waiting for us.” you ignored the pang in your chest as you said natasha’s name, but it was totally because you were just hungry.

“i’m hungry,” wanda whined, able to sense your distress and quickly changing the subject. “do you think tony got a fondue machine?” her strides had widened as she lauded on and on about the potential food options, picking up her pace at each mention of a different dish.

soon, there was good distance between bucky and you and a very distracted wanda. your eyes were fixed on wanda’s back, but you weren’t oblivious to the way bucky’s gaze was glued to the side of your face.

“doll, can i talk to you real quick?” he placed a gentle hand on your arm and you froze, whipping around to finally look at him with wide, doe-like eyes. you snatched your arm out of his grasp only moments after, walking down the hallway faster than before.

bucky’s face fell. he’d opted not to cover his metal arm that night, but he was beginning to regret that decision. he couldn’t tell how much of your avoidance was due to his arm or from some other unknown reason, and he wasn’t sure which was worse.

“no, wait-” bucky jogged to catch up to you, but you only threw an anxious glance over your shoulder. when you locked eyes, you stiffened. bucky was perplexed. he couldn’t think of anything he’d done wrong.

“sweetheart, why are you running from me?” he cooed, giving you distance but wary that you’d run from him again.

“it’s nothing, buck. i’m just… menstruating,” you lied.

“no you’re not.” bucky looked at you pointedly. “i know because we always do movies and chocolate on the 20th, and it’s the 5th. so… ‘fess up.”

“i-” you smiled weakly. “seriously, it’s fine. c’mon, you heard tony. i’m not getting marked late and ruining my perfect attendance record.”

bucky watched as you dashed off, throwing open the doors to the center of the party, leaving him alone and dejected in the hallway. well, not for long. natasha, in a slinky silver dress, snuck behind him silently and coughed. bucky shrieked yelped.

“you’re actually so pathetic.” natasha crossed her arms. “i literally asked her out for you and you’ve somehow managed to make her run away from you?”

bucky shriveled under her piercing disappointment. “what are you even talking about?” he grumbled, kicking an imaginary stone.

“you were supposed to ask her to be your plus one, idiot.” at this point, natasha seemed more upset than bucky, who had already resigned to the fact that he’d be forever alone.

“but you said that was a suggestion,” bucky retorted.

“you should know by now that anything i say, whether it be phrased as a suggestion or not, is mandatory. do better, barnes.” natasha puched bucky in his [flesh] arm before quirking her head thoughtfully.

“i think there’s still a way to salvage this. all you have to do is ignore her, so that she’ll wonder where you are, and then-”

“natasha, that is entirely a contradiction,” bucky interjected.

“buchanan, don’t you trust me?” natasha snapped.

“absolutely not. and don’t call me that.” bucky tried to stand taller and puff out his chest to assert dominance (to hide the fact that he was absolutely clueless on modern courting strategies), but natasha was unimpressed.

“i’m going to pretend i didn’t hear that, because i’d quite like for you to show up to the party in one piece. and don’t think it’s because i’m soft on you. i just think you’d make a good couple and i’m bored,

“so, like i was saying. you disappear, all mysterious and broody. that should be easy enough for you. then, she’ll think, ‘where are you?’ so she’s either going to text you or call you, and that’s when you invite her over. make sure you’re somewhere in the back… preferably dark and a bit secluded.”

bucky was incredulous. “you do realize i’m trying to get her to like me, not tyring to kill her, right?” his trust in natasha, which was already nonexistent, was somehow continuing to deteriorate.

“gramps, i’ve gotten more action in the past year than you’ve had in your entire life.” natasha flipped her hair. “anyways, she already likes you, dingus. i don’t know why…”

natasha stole a look towards the glass doors, which revealed tony’s extravaganza in full swing. she patted bucky’s arm patronizingly. “you’re not trying to get her to like you, alright? you have to show her that you feel the same, because full offense, you’ve been absolutely shit at expressing your feelings. have you always been like this? or did 40s girls just have low standards?”

natasha sauntered off, leaving bucky alone and confused in a hallway once again. he steeled himself, pushing back his shoulders, before stepping through the doors and into the party scene with determination.

he immediately deflated when he caught sight of you, hand resting delicately on top of some shmoozing billionaire (or so he figured), laughing gracefully at something the man had said which probably wasn’t even that funny anyways.

natasha’s step one suddenly became much easier. he had no inclination to chat up some new money assholes who’d probably end up badmouthing him to the press the next day, even if it meant being by your side. he stealthily (or as stealthily as one could for a hulking serum-enhanced man) maneuvered through the excessive crowd to the open bar that he was planning on living off of to survive the night.

third floor on the west side, me and you handsome, you’re a mansion with a view do the girls back home touch you like i do?

“a whiskey, neat,” bucky said, absolutely emotionless, as he slid into a booth. the bartender, who was horrible at hiding their expressions, seemed to cower in bucky’s presence. bucky took advantage of that.

“and make it fast,” he glowered. it was only when the bartender gave bucky a little salute, addressing him by his military title, that bucky smiled for the first time that night. maybe this party wasn’t going to be so bad after all.

“buck!” you screamed into his ear. you were kneeling on the seat from the booth behind him, leaning over the divider so you could make sure you were close enough to shatter his eardrums. he let out a high pitched squeal very masculine sound of being startled.

“aw, did i scare you?” you hopped the booth divider and slid in next to him. the booths were unusually small and bucky was unusually large, so you were essentially halfway on his lap. bucky didn’t know how you could be so nonchalant about it. he felt like he was going to throw up. or that other parts of his body were going to go up.

“n-no,” he insisted; his chin was pressed against his neck.

“that’s such a lie, bucky. you flinched.” bucky tried to protest, but you wouldn’t have any of it. “no, you definitely did! admit it, i surprised you.”

reluctantly, bucky conceded. “okay, maybe i was caught off guard. but i was busy looking for my girl, so whose fault is it really?” he was proud of his answer until he remember what natasha had advised him.

“make sure you disappear, all mysterious and broody.” well, great. it’d been less than 10 minutes. “she’ll think, ‘where are you?’ and that’s when you invite her over.” you’d found him before he could even make a move. the step which he anticipated would be the easiest had already been blown.

“your gi- oh, that reminds me, where’s nat?” your golden demeanor seemed to dampen for just a moment before you perked up again, looking up at bucky with those infinitely deep eyes. he gulped. wasn’t he supposed to be the one with the mesmerizing “steel blue” eyes? you were completely unfazed. this was not going his way, not at all.

“she’s in the bathroom… menstruating, “ he lied, regurgitating your excuse from earlier. you narrowed your eyes at him disbelievingly.

“oo…kay. well, that sucks. she’s gonna miss out on the caviar gun.” you nodded your head towards a man in a bright, coral-colored suit, who was indeed holding a bedazzled sniper rifle (whether it was real or a prop, bucky was too far away to tell) and shooting caviar like bullets into an eagerly waiting crowd. bucky wanted to say that he was surprised, but he wasn’t. this was a stark event, after all.

bucky’s attention was broken as you gasped animatedly. “you used to be a sniper in the 40s, right? we should ask the man if you can try it out!” bucky blushed as he felt your soft hand take his large, calloused one in his.

(he’d once asked you how you kept your hands so well maintained. you’d recommended him some obscure brand of floral lotion. he was wearing it today.)

bucky tried thinking back to what natasha had advised him. “make sure you’re somewhere in the back, preferably dark and bit secluded.” he glanced over at the steadily growing crowd at the caviar-fest. that was literally the opposite of what he’d been told to do. c’mon bucky, you already fucked up step one. you have to pull through with step two.

“actually, i think natasha, uh, wanted me to get her a drink,” bucky blurted. your lips twitched enticingly for a brief moment as if getting a drink was personally offensive to you or something, but you nodded anyways.

“you’re, um, a good date,” you stammered, looking anywhere but at him. bucky blushed. was he winning you over? “natasha’s lucky to have you.”

bucky wanted to die. this was worse than when he fell off the train.

“oh doll, i keep meaning to tell you that-”

“here’s your whiskey, sergeant bucky barnes- shit, james- seargent buchanan barnes. sir.” the bartender pushed the glass towards bucky hastily, their face pale and sweaty. you eyed bucky with suspicion.

“what did you do now, huh? always getting into trouble without me,” you joked, with a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes. he sighed, tapping his fingers against his drink, leaving nervous fingerprints in the condensation. it was rare to see you so… guarded. you were the person who’d taught him how to feel freely and embrace vulnerability. now, you were the one putting up a front.

“i’ll admit, you are a good influence on me.” bucky waved the bartender over once more, who scurried up to the two of you instantaneously.

long nights with your hands up in my hair echoes of your footsteps on the stairs stay here, honey, i don’t want to share ‘cause i like you

“w-what can i do for you today?” the bartender forced the words through their teeth, mouth locked in a fake smile.

“what do you want, sweetheart?” bucky’s tone took a complete 180 as he looked down at you fondly, though you weren’t paying attention. you were more concerned about the bartender who looked like they were on the verge of a heart attack, swaying back and forth.

“i’ll have a… um, i’ll have whatever he’s having,” you smiled sweetly at the flustered bartender, who’d regained color in their cheeks at your comfortable tone.

bucky wrapped an arm around your shoulder, sending you into a dizzying haze of his cologne. “why are you still here? you heard m’girl,” bucky glowered.

you shot him a disapproving glare. “first of all, you’re supposed to be here working on bettering your reputation. second of all, you really should stop calling me ‘your girl’ if you’re out here with nat, i don’t think she’d be comfortable with-”

“can you just shut up for a second?” bucky removed his hand from your shoulder and slapped his forehead. then he realized how rude he looked.

bucky had been worried about you earlier because you’d clearly been hiding your emotions. but it seems like he’d only exacerbated the issue, because now there you were, biting your bottom lip in an unsuccessful attempt to stop it from wobbling. you were unblinking and bucky knew the glassiness in your eyes wasn’t because they’d been open for too long; rather, that you were tearing up and didn’t want to release them.

he really was good at fucking things up, wasn’t he?

“oh, doll, i didn’t mean- shit, i’m so sorry, are you crying? i didn’t mean to make you cry, i must’ve sounded like such an asshole just then,” he prattled, holding his hands up in surrender as he tried to undo all the damage of the night.

“no, no, it’s fine!” you laughed fakely. (thank god you were an avenger. you’d be a horrible actor.) “i didn’t mean to cling on to you the entire evening, i imagine nat’s wondering where you’ve been. how inconsiderate of me! i hope everything’s still okay between us?” your voice was almost an octave higher than normal.

“listen, i-”

“and i’m totally going to get out of your hair now—your hair looks really good by the way, really soft—and you can go have a super fantastic time with nat! um, let her know i have tampons if she needs any. okay, bye!”

the bartender had perfect timing. well, perfect for bucky, and unfortunate for you.

“here you are, ma’am! i wish the beautiful couple a beautiful night.”

that only made you more upset. bucky was very bad with crying people.

“you know what? let’s go. we need to talk.” bucky stood and grabbed your forearm, marching towards the dark, secluded place in the back that he should’ve gone to from the start.

you trailed behind him without protest, quickening your footsteps to keep up with his steady, determined pace. “hey, watch it! these are louboutins!”

bucky all but shoved you into a seat. he stood over you for a few loud heartbeats before he sank into a chair of his own, massaging his temples with exhaustion. “alright. you are not allowed to leave that chair until you hear me out,” he growled. the soft tone he only reserved for you was gone.

“you really piss me off sometimes.” that was a rough start for bucky. it was pretty apparent that he wasn’t the most feely-feel of a guy. “yeah, you do. and y’know why? because you’re so- you’re so you.”

you looked at bucky like he’d gone insane. that was a fair assessment. bucky felt like he’d gone insane too, with the way he’d stopped having any control of what came out of his mouth.

“you do this- this thing, where you’re so optimistic about everything except for when it comes to yourself. you see the best in people—even me, for fuck’s sake—but you can’t see it in yourself. the whole fucking night, i’ve been trying to tell you that i’m not with natasha—don’t give me that look—but you keep running away from me because- because why? ‘cause you don’t believe that in any universe, i’d want to be with you? because you’re wrong!” bucky was flushed and his voice had gotten much louder since the start of his impassioned declaration.

“and you pretended to be happy for me, even though you clearly weren’t happy—yeah, that’s right. i could tell. you’re a shitty liar—because you’re just the kindest, most selfless, the most deserving person i’ve ever known. and i’m one hundred-fucking-six years old. you deserve the world, doll, but it’s like you’d rather give yourself up for the world. nothing could replace you.”

bucky slipped out of his seat to come sit on his knees before you. he took your hands in his, resting your intertwined fingers on your thighs. “nothing could make me feel the same way i feel about you,” he whispered.

neither of you said anything. in the dimness of the corner the two of you were tucked into, he could vaguely make out the fluttering of your lashes, clumped together from the tears that’d soaked into your makeup. he could see your parted lips, swollen from having been bitten and chewed at this entire time. he could even feel your breath on his face, and at that moment, it was as if the air of your soft exhales that tickled his cheeks was the only air left in the world—like you were his only source of oxygen, and that he couldn’t survive without you.

sometimes i wonder, when you sleep are you ever dreaming of me? sometimes when i look into your eyes i pretend you’re mine, all the damn time

“that was a lot of swearing,” you hiccuped, eyes wide and brows furrowed. you shook your head in perplexion as your eyes flickered between his, like some possessive marking of a predator who knows they had their prey entirely under their control. “i don’t- i don’t get it.”

bucky wanted to choke you out. (not in a literal, violent manner! or in a sexual one, for that matter! at least, not in this context.) you were so stupid. how did you still now understand?

“isn’t it obvious?” he chuckled humorlessly. “i’m in love with you, idiot.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

marvel masterlist | main masterlist

taglist: (comment to be added!)

@bambamwolf87 @yourallihave @im-a-slut-for-fluff

#bucky and reader #bucky imagine #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes crackfic #bucky barnes x avenger! reader #bucky barnes friends to lovers #bucky barnes mutual pining #bucky fic #bucky barnes x you

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femmefatale-tales · 9 months

Text

Batman?

Bucky Barnes x f!reader

Summary: Reader and Bucky meet for the first time.

Author’s note: reader is not described as pale or black nor is she described thin or thic. Anyone can read this.

Warnings: fluff? Reader is funny and witty, bucky is broody and grump but turns a softie at the end. Banter like funny banter. Also kinda annoying reader I mean for Bucky.

I am sooo sorry if this is trash cause this is my first fanfic like ever also please tell me if it was funny or not. Lol

I walk to the hall in the compound to get some coffee, actually correction, my 6th cup of coffee of the day. I mean it is a addiction and I don’t deny it but something has to be wrong with me, i can’t just be perfect. Though I do think Lorelai Gilmore is perfect and she drinks coffee. Maybe I am perfect. Someone clears their throat which isn’t me so I look up.

I see a tall man, must be 6’0 foot something, wearing a tight black T-shirt that is evidently small for him, he has the most perfect blue eyes and is actually one of the most handsome man I’ve ever seen and I say this just after seeing a Cillian Murphy movie so you bet I’m serious.

I instead of saying a good “hey” or “hello” ask “are you batman?” Which could be possible, I mean he looks like him with his broody expression.

He looks confused or angry, I can’t really tell. See he’s showing signs of being batman.

I just keep looking at him. “Are you serious?” He asks surprised.

I simply nod.

“ what makes you say that?” He questioned somewhat amused.

“I don’t even say this stupidly, I live with avengers so the fact that you could be batman seems possible to me and you have an expression that says you hate everyone, you’re wearing everything black, and you’re tall, almost all qualities of him are present to be true” I rant.

“I’m not batman. You don’t know me?” He mumbled.

“ No, but you do look familiar. Sorry I have a bad memory, and sometimes I just forget stuff because I didn’t pay attention because I didn’t want to and then I have to remember it since it turns out to be important and-” I keep talking until he cuts me off

“ You talk a lot, do you ever shut up?” He ask obviously agitated.

“I don’t really but only sometimes if it’s really important or if nat or Steve make me. Oh and when I’m sleeping but I would’ve know that actually because I’ll be the one sleeping” i continue to annoy him further.

“Shut up” He looks kinda like he’s teasing but it’s hard to tell.

“Why should-” he interrupts again.

“Okay that’s enough, and now you can stop talking” he groans.

“Wow rude much, grinch” he rolls his eyes at the comment.

Almost 30 seconds pass by and both of us stay silent but i of-course couldn’t just shut up cause where’s the fun in that so I started again.

“Does the serum give you extra stamina during sexy times?” I ask curiously breaking the silence.

“Oh my god, are you- can you not shut up for some time??” He speaks his frown too evident one his face.

I keep staring at him waiting for the answer.

“ Okay that’s it. Are you serious? You’re really asking that question ??” He says amused yet annoyed at the same time.

I just looking at him as if it’s not obvious that I was serious.

After 10 seconds of Bucky just staring at me he finally says “ It does”

“ Wait,So you know who I am” he stats.

“ oh yeah, I figured that out when you were asking if I always talk so much” I say casually.

“You want coffee?” I say going to the kitchen counter.

He looks at me surprised and chuckles saying “sure”.

“You always offer coffee to dangerous people you don’t know?” He asks smugly.

“Yes and no. See I know you, I might have forgot but it’s only because I just saw a dilf’s movies” I say giving him the coffee.

“What’s a dilf?” He questions.

“You but I doubt you have kids” I giggle.

“I don’t even wanna know what you meant by that” he stats.

“ What’s your zodiac sign?” I ask him trying to sit on the counter but it’s a bit too high tbh.

He comes in front of me seeing my struggle and holds my waist ,hoists me up on the counter. His hands are a bit cold but they send a warmth through my body which I don’t really notice until he takes his place on the chair in front of the counter again.

“ I don’t know, Sam told me about them but I don’t know mine” he shrugs.

“Oh okay just tell me your birthday” I tell him

“March 10”

“Oh so you’re a pieces which is weird because you’re looks could give you away as a Scorpio” I say surprised.

“Okay…, that’s some useless information to me but whatever” he speaks

“ I mean it is useless but it’s fun sometimes” I say

“Anyways, what’s you’re name?” He asks

“Oh yeah I haven’t told you a that yet, it’s Y/N Y/L/N.”

“Pretty name” he says looking up at me.

“Ohh thank you, you have pretty name too actually , I really like James. I’m gonna call you James from now on actually” I say feeling a bit flustered from the compliment.

“Ofcourse you can ,great of you to ask, you know” he sarcastically replied

I just give him a cheeky smile and finish my coffee. I jump down on the floor and put my cup in the sink.

“Okay babe, now I’m gonna go and take a shower, we’ll meet later” I speak turning on my heels to the exit.

He chuckles at the nickname and shakes his head waving a bye in direction.

“Bye batman” I shout as I disappear in the elevator.

Leaving bucky smiling to himself.

#bucky barnes x reader #incorrect bucky quotes #bucky barnes x short!reader #tfatws!bucky #grumpy sunshine trope #bucky barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky fic #grumpy #bucky series #james bucky buchanan barnes #marvel #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky x female reader #bucky and reader #tumblr fyp

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simplyholl · 3 months

Text

A Night With The Winter Soldier

Summary: You’re sent to be Hydra’s test subject for a new serum.

Pairing: F. Reader x Winter Soldier Bucky

Warnings: Smut. 18+ Only. Minors DNI. Dark Bucky. Non con. Oral. Unprotected sex.

See My Masterlist Here

A/N: I know I don’t usually write for Bucky, but this idea has been stuck in my head for a long time. I’m just tagging my regular tag list, if you’re not into dark fics, please skip! ❤️

Fucked. That’s what you were or at least what you were going to be. You shake your head as you cover your skimpy lingerie with the matching robe your mother gave to you.

Your father is the head scientist for Hydra. He had been working on this experiment for years. He had created a serum that would cause Super Soldiers to want to reproduce. The end result would be a perfect Super Soldier baby. He finally perfected it. Who could be a better test subject than his daughter?

You begged him. You pleaded and cried. It was unfair to expect this of you. But he didn’t care how you felt. He said it was your duty to do as you were told. You didn’t want to make Hydra upset with your family, did you? You knew the horrors that awaited you if you refused. Your best friend, Lilly and her whole family disappeared three years ago when her father refused a command from Hydra. They were brutal and cruel. Sadly, you were used to it.

Hydra came first. Before yourself, before your family, your loyalty had to be unwavering. You knew it wasn’t really your father who had suggested it be you. Your mother told you it was one of the higher ups. He had seen you in your new sundress a few weeks ago and thought you would be perfect to carry the first Super Soldier baby.

It made you sick. How could they do this? You didn’t want to know what would happen if you refused. “At least, he is the strongest Super Soldier. This baby’s genes will be impeccable with the both of you for parents.” Your mother reassured you, as if it would help you feel better.

You weren’t naive. You and the baby would be monitored from the moment you got pregnant. As soon as you gave birth, the child would be ripped from your arms and watched closely. It wouldn’t really be yours.

You take the elevator to the thirteenth floor, heart racing wildly. You were scared. You had seen the Super Soldiers behind glass doors where you were protected from them. Now, you were being offered on a silver platter to the biggest baddest one, like a worm on a hook waiting for a fish to jump after them.

Two guards stand outside the door to the windowless room. Their eyes roam over your barely covered body. They smirk at you as they type in the code to let you in. “Good luck, princess. You’re going to need it.” They evilly laugh as the door opens. Slowly, you walk in, your breath catching in your throat as you hear the steel door bang tightly shut behind you.

The room is dimly lit. A leather chair in one corner, a bed pressed against the wall, there’s a table with a half worked puzzle on it. It was so dreary, your heart aches for the poor guy that called this room home. You walk over to the table, running your hand over the puzzle. That’s when you feel it. Even though you couldn’t see him, you’re not alone. He’s in here with you, hid in the dark corners somewhere. You turn around to find him staring at you.

The Winter Soldier, Bucky Barnes, you had demanded to know his name before you did this. His dark hair hung in waves by his cheeks, his cold blue eyes focused on your body. He was beautiful. You weren’t used to seeing him without the black mask he usually wore. He was shirtless, his silver, metal arm catching your attention. You studied it. The way it looks like it was forcefully put on, the red star on his shoulder. He was always silent, brooding in the shadows. You had never been this close to him.

You reach for his face, wanting to feel him before all this started. His metal arm stops you, cold hand wrapping around your wrist. You squeak when he twists your arm behind your back, walking you toward the table.

He presses you against it, you feel his erection threatening to burst out of his black pants. One swipe of his free hand knocks the puzzle to the floor. Colorful pieces scatter all around you. He lifts you on top of the table, the cold surface making you gasp when your bare legs land on it.

Bucky holds you with his metal arm, the other one makes quick work of your flimsy robe. He grabs your breast through the thin fabric of your lingerie. You squirm under his touch as he pinches your nipple through the lace.

“You don’t know how bad I need this. Been a long time since I’ve had a pretty girl like you in my bed.” You’re shocked when he speaks to you. You had been warned that he wouldn’t talk to you at all. He takes a step back to look at you, zeroing in on your panties.

He pushes your back to the wall, commanding you to stay there. You obey, you didn’t want to upset him and make this worse for yourself. He holds your top in one hand, jerking the material. The sound of it’s ripping, startling you. He was crazy strong. The thought of being manhandled by him sounded better by the second.

Next was your panties, he stripped you of them quickly, pulling you by your legs to the edge of the table. He got on his knees before you, shoving his face to your core. He licks one fat stripe up your center, moaning as he tastes you. He swirls his tongue across your clit, you buck your hips up to get closer.

Bucky pushes you down with his metal arm, ensuring that you wouldn’t be able to move. You accept your fate, laying back as he laps at you. He fucks you with his tongue, his nose rubbing expertly against your sensitive nub. The band tightly wound in your stomach snaps as he drags his wicked tongue across your clit, sucking you between his lips. He doesn’t hold back his moans as your arousal floods his face.

When he emerges, his face is glistening because of you. He wipes it off with the back of his flesh hand. Bucky jerks you off the table, pointing to the cold, cement ground. “On your knees.” You sink down in front of him as he sheds his pants. You’re surprised he hadn’t already taken them off.

You shift on your knees, trying to get comfortable. He could at least offer you a pillow to kneel on or something. You look around, and spot the only one on his bed. You’re about to ask for it, when he pulls your hair roughly, jerking your head toward his throbbing cock. It was huge. The kind of big that would hurt. You open your mouth, trying to take all of him inside.

You choke and gag, spit dribbling down your chin onto your breasts as you struggle. He looks down at you, hand still tangled in your hair. Your jaw aches already and he’s just getting started. He thrusts his hips forward, pushing your head down simultaneously. Tears fill your eyes as he hits the back of your throat. You can’t help the sob that escapes you as he pulls out, only to forcefully push his way back in.

His thumbs follow the tears on your cheeks, your mascara pooling under your eyes making you look like a raccoon. “You look so pretty when you cry.” He coos, while looking at you adoringly. He thrusts three more times, your nails dig into his thighs, a silent plea to stop. He finally pulls out, collecting you from the floor and gently placing you on his bed.

He places one leg over his shoulder, lining himself up at your entrance. He pushes inside and it’s too much. “It’s- you’re too big.” You explain. Bucky moves your other leg, spreading you wider. “You’re gonna take all of it.” He grunts, wedging himself inside you, bottoming out with one thrust. He ignores your pained scream, leaning down to lick your fresh tears.

“So tight. So perfect. Just for me.” He praises in your ear. Finally, the pain subsides. Bucky feels incredible, his thick cock dragging against the spot that makes your head swim. A gush of arousal soaks him as he swirls his metal thumb in circles on your clit.

“Look at you, such a good girl, dripping all over my cock.” You moan, clenching around him, your long nails clawing his back, drawing blood as your second orgasm rips through you. His thrusts grow sloppy as you feel him go still inside you. His hot cum, drips down your legs as he withdraws himself from you.

Bucky swipes it with his index finger, rubbing it with his thumb. He brings it to your lips, you swirl your tongue around his long digit, loving the way he tastes. You’re caught off guard when his icy, metal hand collects as much cum as he can, stuffing it back inside you.

You twitch, trying to pull away from the cold hand on your heat. “Ah ah ah.” He scolds. He presses his cool thumb to your clit, toying with the oversensitive pearl. “You have to take every drop.” When he’s satisfied with his work, he makes you lay on your back so it doesn’t drip back out.

You close your eyes, the sweet promise of sleep taking over you. You are almost in dream land when you feel the familiar nudge of Bucky’s cock at your sore center. “What are you doing?” You ask, too tired to fight him. “I’m not finished with you yet, doll.” He smiles wickedly, snapping his hips to fill you again.

Tags

@lokisgoodgirl @fictive-sl0th @lokidbadguy @ozymdias @cindylynn @cakesandtom @eleniblue @marygoddessofmischief @mochie85 @goblingirlsarah @wheredafandomat @freegardenbanananeck @lokidokieokie @l0ki3000 @multifandom-worlds @alexakeyloveloki @ladymischief11 @kats72 @mischief2sarawr @lamentis-10 @loz-3 @litaloni @lulubelle814 @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @avengersfan25 @silver-tongue-taken-to-bed @mybugabomlb @bunny24sstuff @luthien-elvenia-asher @gruftiela @asgards-princess-of-mischief @weirdothatwritess

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cosmicbucky · 7 months

Text

daisies and dances lead to heartfelt romances

summary: you offer to take bucky out a few times so he can practice what it's like to date in the modern world. unbeknownst to each other, both your offer and his acceptance have an ulterior motive

pairing: bucky barnes x female reader

word count: 3845

part: one

warnings: minor swearing, fluff, tony is a dick with a hidden agenda, some angst, soft/shy/grumpy bucky, pet names/nicknames, unknown but mutual pining, oblivious idiots in love, sad bucky, mentions of bucky's struggles

a/n: this is planned to be at least two parts, maybe three.

big thank you to @buckys-wintersoldier for encouraging and supporting me with this!!

《《《《 ♡ 》》》》

The compound was quiet, softly lit to guide your way to the kitchen. It was late in the night, but not too late that everyone was asleep. Your socked feet were silent on the cold floor, and as you made your way to the fridge you heard laughter coming from the main entertainment room. You smiled to yourself as you went to grab a bottle of juice, focusing in on the conversation being held.

"Come on man! You can't be serious," you heard Sam say, laughter clear in his voice.

"Just drop it, Sam," Bucky replied, warning clear in his voice.

The smile slipped from your face as you closed the fridge with a sigh. You knew that tone. It wasn't Bucky's patented 'my god these people are so annoying' tone. It was his 'the next person who says something is getting thrown into a wall' tone. Which meant he was actually upset over whatever the conversation was about. It was rare for him to really get worked up beyond his usual moody demeanor, and you couldn't help the worry that surged through you.

"Oh, no. No, no this is way too good to drop, Barnes," Tony chimed in with a laugh. You could just picture the smirk on his face, and your feet moved quickly to carry yourself towards the conversation.

Bucky noticed you approach from where he sat, and he sent you a pleading look. Please help me, his eyes screamed.

"Don't tell me you guys are picking on Bucky again," you said, trying to sound casual as you leaned against the wall.

"You mean grumpy mcgee over here? You bet your ass we are," Tony replied happily.

You sighed, rolling your eyes at him. "Why now?"

"This dude can't date to save his life!" Sam spoke up, overly amused about it.

Bucky sank further into the couch, crossing his arms over his chest as he zoned out to somewhere far away, and you felt a pang in your heart at the sight- how can such a large man manage to look so small; so defeated?

"You guys are roasting him because he hasn't been on a date yet?" you asked, your annoyance about it clear in your voice.

It may be a little strange, but you had always felt protective over Bucky. The team often ganged up on him, and besides Steve, you were his closest friend - the two of you took a little while to warm up to each other, but once the ice thawed the two of you were rarely seen without the other. Now, it's not to say you never joined in on teasing him - because you did, quite often - but you knew when to stop. Perhaps it was because he would open up to you about some of the things he felt insecure about during your moonlit talks, the two of you tucked safely under blankets or hidden away somewhere in the compound as you spoke what neither of you could say in the light of day. Or, maybe it was because you just knew him well enough to know whether a topic would upset him or not. Whatever the reason may be for it, you always knew what was okay to say and what wasn't. Bucky would never be able to say how much he appreciated you for that.

"Tinman's been on dates, didn't you know?" Tony asked, grinning at you mischievously. "He just blew them all."

You tried not to let the hurt show on your face. He's been on dates? God, of course he has, look at him.

"Okay, and? You've never had bad dates before?" you asked, letting the anger start to shine through. "Just leave him alone."

Tony rolled his eyes. "Awe, look at that. Mommy dearest to the rescue once again, huh, Barnes?"

You stood up straight as rage surged through you, opening your mouth to tell him where to go. Before you could, Bucky's voice rang out: "Watch your fucking mouth, Stark. Or I'll shut you up myself," he warned, voice eerily calm as he glared at Tony.

Bucky was never really one to speak up when others came at him, more or less just taking it with an eye roll, clenched jaw, or tight smile as they all had their fun. However, once the comments turned towards you, as they always seemed to if you were around (and let's be honest, how often were you not around?), he was quick on his feet to stop them in their tracks, making the room feel so tense that no one else said anything for fear the air around them would actually suffocate them if they opened their mouth.

"Here we go again," you heard Sam mutter to himself. "Alright, I'm out of here. See you guys later," he added, walking out of the room with his hands up in a display of surrender.

He gave you a knowing look as he walked out, ignoring your questioning gaze and instead giving you a loving pat on the shoulder as he passed by. With him now out of sight, you turn your attention back to Tony, waiting for what was to come next.

"Look, all I'm saying-" Tony started, waving his glass around emphatically - amber liquid on the verge of splashing everywhere.

"No one cares what you're saying, Tony," you interrupted, already exasperated from the interaction.

He held up his hand, pointing a finger at you. "Come on, princess. You really gonna take away my fun? Under my own roof?"

"Yes, I am. Can't you take a day off from being a complete dick to him? Just once? We've all seen this show before, Tony, and it always ends the same way," you said, walking further into the room to snatch the glass from his hand, glaring at him as you did so. "And don't call me princess," you seethed, slamming the glass down on the side table behind you.

You didn't want to hate Tony, in all honesty you truly did love him. At the end of the day he was your family, and family wasn't perfect. However, you couldn't keep down the small bubbles of hatred that boiled inside you whenever he started to target Bucky. You didn't see him as family when he waved his disdain for the soldier around like a kite in the wind; you just saw him as a rich douchebag picking on someone beneath him. You hated the way he treated Bucky, and you absolutely loathed the way he made Bucky's voice tremble ever so slightly with self doubt when he lays in your arms in the dead of night, recounting the things Tony said to him that keep him awake, that make old wounds reopen. You loved Tony, but his hatred for Bucky also made you hate him.

"No? Do you only like it when RoboCop calls you that?" Tony asked calmly, a malicious glint shining in his eyes, his smirk growing wider when he saw your expression.

You felt the blood rush to your face, recounting a few of the times that the name had slipped through Bucky's lips; though it was from the haze of sleep and moments of vulnerability, there were few memories you cherished more. "Go to sleep now, princess. I'll be here when you wake up." "Thank you for staying with me, princess." "You're safe now, princess."

"Yeah, I hear a lot of things around here that I probably shouldn't. Now, why don't you lighten up and let me say my piece, princess?" Tony continued with a grin, and it took everything in you to not smack it off his face.

"I'm gonna fucking kill you," Bucky suddenly spat, making you jump slightly - he had fallen so silent you half forgot he was even there. The menace that dripped from his words sent a chill down your spine, and you sent one last glare at Tony before you glanced over your shoulder.

One look over at Bucky as he jumped from the couch told you he had never been more serious. His jaw was tight as his lips pressed together in a fine line, his fists clenched so tightly that the mechanisms in his left arm started to whir and the veins in his right arm shone prominently, his whole body tense as his chest heaved. He took two quick steps forward, but the second you raised your hand to his chest he stopped.

"Buck, it's alright," you said calmly. You knew it wasn't - you were angry, hurt, embarrassed, and a million other things; but you couldn't let Bucky in on that. You had to brush it all off so you could be the calm that Bucky needed in order to tame the never ending storm raging furiously inside him.

Bucky looked down at you with narrowed eyes, as if he didn't understand a word you said. "I'm supposed to just let him talk to you like that?"

If it weren't for the seriousness of the moment, you would have blushed from his words. Instead, you huffed and lightly shoved him away. "Yes, because you're feeding into exactly what he wants, Bucky. You know all he wants is to mess with you."

"Not true," Tony chimed in from behind you. "I want lots of things, pumpkin. In fact, one of those things is Pepper, so I'll be going now. And hey, when you and soldier boy here finally get married, just remember - I'm ordained."

You spared a glance in his direction just in time to see his shit-eating grin before he turned and sauntered happily out of the room.

"Can you two ever give me a fucking break?" you scolded, crossing your arms over your chest.

"Aw don't you start now, too," Bucky whined, tossing his head back slightly as he sighed, making his way back to the couch.

You sighed as well, following in his wake to plop down beside him. You didn't need to say anything, he took one look at you and knew the question that was already dancing on your tongue: what was it about this time?

"Look, it doesn't matter," he huffed out, slumping his shoulders as he looked down at his hands resting on his lap, wringing his fingers together.

“Come on, when have I ever let it go that easily?” you asked, nudging his shoulder.

He let out a humourless chuckle, the corners of his mouth flicking upwards for the briefest of moments as the memories of the countless times you two have been in this situation flashed through his mind.

You could see the turmoil on his face, and you knew he was trying to find a way to express what was going on, so you sat patiently and waited for him to find the proper words.

“I don’t know what the hell I’m doing,” he finally settled on, the words coming out in a rushed breath.

Before you could question him, he carried on with a frown, his brows knit together. “It was so much easier back then, you know? Flash a smile, go to the fair, wear the uniform, whatever. I never had to think about it, but now there’s- there’s just so much…. so much expectation. You bring flowers and you care too much, you don’t bring flowers and you don’t care enough. I-it’s like everything that I do, I should have done the opposite. I can’t get anything right.”

You sat in silence for a moment, his words bouncing around in your head. Each syllable he spoke fractured your heart until it was shattered into bits; but all you cared about as you looked at the broken man in front of you was putting him back together, hoping that your words and your comfort and your care would be enough to put together the delicate pieces of him - the pieces that broke off every time he doubted himself, every time he remembered his past, every time he did something wrong on a mission - the pieces that you picked up and kept safe inside of yourself until you had the chance to give them back to him, gluing them on with whispers of affirmation and promises that everything would be okay in time.

“You never mentioned any of this before,” you said tentatively, the unspoken words why did you keep this from me? hanging in the air. “Is this what they were teasing you about? Your struggle to figure out how to date again?”

He let out a huff of air as he slung his head back to rest against the back of the couch, shaking it lightly as he stared up at the ceiling, his jaw flexing with contemplation. “I didn’t want it to be a big deal, but then Jackass 1 and Jackass 2 found out and ran with it.”

“Okay, well.. walk me through it. Is there someone you want to take out on a date right now? Maybe I can give you some ideas,” you offered softly, the words tasting bitter in your mouth as you spoke them.

He groaned, running his hands over his face before smacking them back down on his legs, his palms dragging across the fabric covering his thighs for a few seconds; a habit, you noticed, that he often did when he was nervous or uncomfortable. “No,” he said flatly, biting down on his tongue to keep the words yes, my delicate little flower, I want to take you out on a date from tumbling out of his mouth.

“No?” you echoed, surprised by the response.

He nodded his head in confirmation. “No,” he repeated, looking at you. Taking in your expression, he carried on. “Like, no there isn’t anyone. I don’t- I didn’t even want to go on those dates, but… I couldn’t- I mean, I kinda just…. felt like I needed to."

There was so much he left unsaid at this moment. So much he wanted to say, needed to say - not only just to get it off his chest, but because he believed that you deserved to know. Every time he looked at you he had the burning desire to bare his soul to you, to tell you all the things he kept buried away in the deep recesses of his mind, locked away in a vault only you could open. He wanted to tell you that he still feels so out of place, that most days when he was out in this new world he suddenly resembled a child who was lost amongst a crowd of scary and unfamiliar things - desperately searching for something he recognized that he could cling to. He wanted to tell you that you were the familiar thing he found to cling to, that he carried you in his head and in his heart every time he was out; that when things got too overwhelming he closed his eyes and recalled the encouraging words you always told him, that when that wasn't enough he called you with some lame excuse just so he could ground himself with your voice - "Hey, doll. What was the name of that bakery you took me to the other week? I'm thinking of getting more of those cookies we liked." He had saved the bakery's location to his phone (something he knew how to do thanks to you) the second he saw how your eyes sparkled when you got there, just to make sure he could always find it and pick things up for you. "Hey, so, I just got yelled at because I walked by and ruined someone's… what the fuck was it? It has to do with a clock or something? Does that sound like something you know? Please tell me what the hell that is because I feel like I'm going insane." He knew what it was. He had downloaded the app after he witnessed how much it made you laugh, and he had an endless amount of saved videos that he thought you would like, but for some reason wasn't brave enough to show you. "Okay, I’m out shopping - and don't laugh because this is a serious question - do you think I would look good in pink?" He vividly remembered your words from a few months ago, when he was burritoed in your fuzzy pink blanket during movie night, and you told him so casually that he should start wearing pink because it complimented his eyes. He wanted to tell you that you were the only thing in this universe that could still the incessant maelstrom that was his mind. That when he was out on those dates the storm raged on more intensely than ever, but one look or word from you and everything was quiet; not even a trace of rain.

He wanted to tell you. But he didn't. He couldn't. He wouldn't. Oh, but he needed to-

"You wanted to try to fit in," your gentle voice pulled him from his thoughts, his head snapping to look at you. To see your eyes, full of understanding. To see your lips, pulled into a sad smile - but not one of pity, one that said all you wanted was to help him through yet another battle he was fighting with himself.

"Yeah," he sighed. "Yeah. I guess I just figured.. well, I don't know. Everyone kept saying how I needed to get out there. That dating was the next best step I could take to try and….. to- to understand how to live in this world better. I just wanted things to make sense again, but now I'm even more lost and confused than before I even went on those god damn dates."

You tried to keep your face even, to not let him see how sad it made you to hear the way his voice wavered when he told you what was going on. To not let him know that you sensed how small he was feeling, how even though his broad frame still shadowed you as you both sat there, he had never seemed so small.

"Well…. take me on a date," you suggested, not taking the time to even think about it.

Bucky swore the whole room started to spin. His mouth ran dry and his heart hammered so heavily in his chest that he was convinced you could hear it. He knew he heard you wrong, he wasn't lucky enough to have a girl like you. The world was cruel, and he knew that the one sliver of hope that he had for a truly blissful life would never be fully his. That one day it would leave him, just like everything else throughout the years, as you found yourself in the arms of someone else. He would never have you the way he wanted you, the way he needed you. He knew that. So he had to have misheard you. "Come again?"

Your whole face lit up when he asked this, and Bucky could feel himself coming undone. Your hands on his arm when you grabbed him in excitement suddenly felt so different than in the past. It used to feel warm, comforting, calming; but for some reason this time it sent a jolt of fire and electricity through him, and he never wanted to lose that feeling. He wanted to feel it again, feel it always, feel it forever.

“Yeah! Oh, it would be great, Buck! We can go on a few dates, and I can help you find your footing with it all before you get back out there,” you said excitedly. You purposely overinflated your smile so he wouldn’t see the way your lips faltered with the struggle of getting out the last part, diverting your gaze for the smallest of moments so he wouldn’t see the way your eyes dimmed with the thought of him being with someone else.

Bucky shifted where he sat, opening and closing his mouth a few times as his mind went into overdrive trying to think of a response. Every fiber of his being was screaming at him to say yes, but then there was a small piece of him that knew it wouldn’t end well - the piece that knew how he truly felt about you, the piece that knew it would easily be tricked into thinking these dates actually meant something to you; because lord knows they would mean the world and more to him. Bucky wanted to say yes, but he knew he had to say no. He had to say no because it wouldn’t be fair to you - you were offering to help him and he would be taking advantage of your kindness, using it to get to see you in a light he’d never be able to otherwise. He had to say no because saying yes could ruin everything. He may not be able to go back to the way it was before these dates, too addicted to ever quit you. He had to say no, for your sake, because it was a selfless offer. Bucky, however, was selfish when it came to you.

“You know, doll… that may not be the worst idea I’ve ever heard,” he had said, giving you a lopsided smile. Your eyes lit up once more as you grinned at him, and no matter how hard he tried to keep his composure he couldn’t help but mirror your expression, feeling as giddy as he did the first time he was allowed to stay up late as a kid.

“Excellent choice, Barnes,” you said playfully. “I swear you won’t regret it, it’ll be really fun. Just you and me, no expectations.”

Bucky nodded, shifting his head to scratch his jaw so you wouldn’t see the light frown that danced across his lips for a moment. “No expectations,” he repeated, careful to keep his voice level. “I can work with that.”

“Good,” you said softly, nodding a little. “I’ll give you some time to think about it and plan something, and you can just let me know whenever you wanna go on date number one.”

He was silent for a minute, taking the time to carefully churn the words over in his mind before answering. He didn’t want to make it obvious, but he knew immediately what he wanted to do. How could he not? All he ever did was look for new things he thinks you’d like, find himself dreaming of where he’d take you if he ever got the chance. Sure, you guys have done lots of things together before - brunches, lunches, dinners, movie nights, events, parties; you name it. Though there was never any meaning with any of those, it was always just friends spending time together. How were either of you supposed to know you each wished they meant something more? Heaven forbid you two would actually say how you felt.

"No need," Bucky said, rising from the couch with a small chuckle, looking down at you with the smile he reserved only for you. The one that skillfully said everything and nothing all at once. “Lunch. Tomorrow.”

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imtryingbuck · 6 months

Text

Dancing In The Rain

~gif not mine credit to owner ~

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Summary: reader and Bucky dance in the rain

Word count: 927

Warnings: nothing

Masterlist

“He truly loves her, doesn’t he?” Nat speaks as she holds the cup full of hot chocolate closer to her chest.

“His thoughts are so loud whenever she’s around” Wanda leans her head on the other red heads shoulder.

Steve stands next to them watching his best friend finally find happiness “what do you mean?”

“Well when she’s not here I can’t hear anything coming from him but when she is here, it’s pure love, all the bad memories disappear because of her, he worships the ground she walks on” the smile on her face slips into a grin “and the sexy thoughts… let’s just say that’s he’s more than satisfied and creative in that department” chuckling as Steve starts blushing.

“Didn’t need to know the last part Wand.”

“Is it bad that I’m jealous of an 106 year old great grand dad with a metal arm and a staring problem?” A voice sounds from behind the trio.

“Nope not bad at all Sammy, all three of us are jealous” Winking at Nat and Steve when they give her a look.

All four of them now stand side by side, Steve speaks up again “What about her thoughts?” Curious to how the woman who’s captured his best friend’s heart really feels.

“Her thoughts are loud too. She really loves him, she’s not afraid of him in the slightest - you guys remember a few months ago when he had that really bad nightmare?-” Of course they remember that night, they all got woken up to him screaming, by the time anyone had the chance to calm him down he was up and out of the bed destroying everything in the room. He thought he was back at Hydra not realising he was at the tower and he was now safe, all of them tried to calm him down but nothing worked. Steve and Sam wore the bruises for a week as proof. It wasn’t until Nat ran back to her room to grab her phone to ring Y/n, who arrived as fast as she could, out of breath due to her taking the stairs because ‘the elevator was taking too long’. Still in her pjs, her hair was dishevelled and pure panic was written all over her face. All it took was her saying his name to stop him from throwing another punch into Sam’s already bloody face. All it took was her to gently touch his face for him to snap back into reality.

Continuing when they all nod “- she wasn’t scared of him but for him. She was scared of the situation, scared of us hating him for what had happened. But never scared of Bucky. And the other day when Peter ran into him making him spill his drink? He had to take his shirt off right, the names she calls Hydra when she saw the scar on his shoulder would make a sailor blush” chuckling at the memory of that day “She’s even thought of how she was going to make Hydra pay for what they did to her Bucky, she’d put you to shame Natty. She loves him so don’t worry Steve; she’s not going to hurt him.”

Steve smiles softly “Thankyou”

~~~

~ 20 minutes earlier ~

“No” pulling his hand away “Baby I said no, we’re not going outside. It’s raining baby and I don’t want you getting ill”

“Please Buck I want to dance in the rain!”

“You’ll get ill”

“You’ll nurse me back to health” smirking with her eyebrow raised.

“There’s no music” he copies her expression.

“Don’t need music”

“It’s raining”

“It’s romantic”

Sighing, he knows she knows he close to giving up but he’s determined to get his own way this time “No Y/n now sit that pretty arse down and watch Ricky and Morty”

“Rick and Morty”

“That’s what I said”

“No you said Ricky when it’s Rick. Anyways come and dance in the rain with me”

“Don’t even think about it” is all he says when he notices the change in her body language.

“You asked for this Bucko, you only have yourself to blame” inhaling a deep breath and exhaling slowly - she winks at him “please please please please please please please please please plea-“

“God damn it you crazy woman, let’s go then”

“Love you”

“Yeah yeah love you too”

~~~

The rain falls lightly as they make their way outside, even though he’s annoyed with himself for giving in he can’t help the smile that creeps it’s way on to his face, especially not when his girl has a huge smile on her pretty face.

Gently clasping her hands in his, he pulls her into him “have I ever told you how much I love you?”

“Everyday, but tell me again” smiling up at him she makes no attempt to get rid of the raindrop that landed on her eyelashes.

“I. Love. You. More. Then. Anything” each of his words are ended with a kiss to her lips.

“I love you too James. Can we slow dance?”

“Of course, my love”

As the rain continues to fall the pair slow dance already getting drenched Bucky hums a tune, one that she doesn’t recognise. A surprised squeal escapes Y/n lips when Bucky spins her around.

“We’ve got an audience” she confesses.

“Who?”

“Wanda, Nat, Sam and Steve”

They both burst out laughing when Bucky looks up and the four Avengers standing in front of the window drops down to the floor.

“They are aware we can still see them, right?”

~ banners credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

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stevenssacrab · 5 months

Text

Good Neighbor Pt. 2

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ✧ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ*

Summary: After a successful dinner date with Bucky, you invite him to cook dinner with you

Rating: 18+ (minors, do not interact)

Warnings: Lots of flirting, teasing, mentions of knives, sexual tension, mentions of alcohol, light kissing

Word Count: 1.7k

a/n: Part 2! Glad everyone liked part 1, hope part 2 is up to par!

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ✧ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ*

Part 1

“Hey, you aren’t allergic to mushrooms, are you?” you sent out the message; after the dinner, you exchanged numbers and have been texting each other nonstop all week; even your coworkers have noticed you seem happier. You’ve been looking for recipes and doing it for hours, trying to pick the perfect one. So what if this dinner was an excuse to spend time with Bucky? You had been thinking of ways to get some one-on-one time with him, and this was perfect; you could hide it under the guise of trying to teach him to cook.

“No, I’m not; anything is good,” he responded almost immediately; you smiled at his quick response; it made you feel like you were always on his mind. Talking with Buck never felt like a chore; the conversation flowed naturally. It was as if you had been friends for a long time. It was refreshing not needing to try so hard. Bucky always made you feel special, paying extra attention whenever you spoke, hanging off every word, afraid he’d miss a critical detail, and that’s precisely what had you head over heels for him; the feeling was new, but you knew you wanted more.

“Okay, thanks, Buck,” you replied; you remember when you called him Buck for the first time, you were wishing each other goodnight, and it just slipped out; you didn’t even think about it; it just happened; everything with Bucky felt natural.

It was 10 minutes before Bucky had to head to your place, and he was pacing. He was so nervous; he promised himself he wouldn't get so worked up, but he didn’t want to blow this opportunity. He had feelings for you, and he didn’t wanna blow it; you’re the first girl that treated him like a person and not a superhero; everything felt ordinary and simple, and that’s all he wanted.

“Okay, Buck, you got this,” he said out loud, patting himself on the chest.

“It’s go time, Buck.” With that, he opens the door, takes the 2 steps across the hall, and knocks on your door.

“Hey, Bucky! Right on time,” you say giddily, stretching your arms out and wrapping Bucky in a tight hug; you don’t miss the chance to take in his scent, a mix of vanilla and teakwood, a smell you could get used to.

“I brought some wine. Hope white is okay?” he said, holding up the bottle.

“It’s perfect, Buck,” you say, smiling sweetly at him.

“Come in, please,” you say, opening the door wider for him.

“The kitchen is right this way,” you say, lightly grabbing his hand and leading him into the kitchen.

“So, I got you something,” you say, playfully hiding the gift behind your back. Bucky's eyes widened; he hadn’t even thought of getting you a gift.

“I didn’t get,” he says, starting to panic.

“Oh, Buck, it's fine; just open it.” You hand him a green box wrapped with a red bow. Feeling anxious, He grabs it slowly; he opens the box and pulls out an apron with a picture of a muscular man. He starts laughing loudly, shoulders bouncing with glee; he calms down a little bit, looks at the apron again, and resumes laughing loudly with tears in his eyes. You laugh with him; you didn’t think he would like it so much.

“I’m happy you like it,” you laugh, helping him put it on, slowly sliding your hands down and resting them on his firm chest. He clears his throat, and you snap out of it, quickly pulling your hands back.

“Uh, sorry, I-” you stutter out, blush creeping up your face.

“It’s okay,” he says; he gently grabs your hand and places it back onto his chest, keeping his hand over yours. You’re dumbfounded; all thoughts leave your brain; what snaps you out is Bucky softly squeezing your hand, and you rip your hand away from him.

"Can you tie it for me?" he asks, and he turns, showing you his board back; you slowly grab the straps and tie them, letting your hands roam up his back to his shoulder blades and down his arms; you clear your throat.

"All done," you say innocently, smiling up at Bucky.

“Can you help me with mine?” you ask shyly, turning around. Bucky grabs the apron and slides it over your head, and you move your hair to the side. Bucky sucks in a breath seeing your exposed neck; he traces his hand down your back and leans forward to grab the strings; you get goosebumps feeling his breath fan across your neck; he ties the apron around you, he lets his hands roam your back, caressing your neck gently. He slowly pulls his hands away, already missing your body against his hands.

“Okay, let’s um start,” you say, hastily pulling ingredients from the fridge, Bucky smiling to himself at how scatterbrained he made you. “Oh, this is gonna be fun,” he thinks, moving to help you pull out ingredients.

“Alright, I think we have everything,” you say, reviewing the list on your phone.

“I picked an easy recipe for your first time; now pay attention; we’re doing this for you,” you say matter-of-factly.

“Thanks for being gentle for my first time,” he says coyly, winking at you.

“Are you gonna be like this all night?” you ask, raising your eyebrow.

“Yes,” he gives a smug look.

“Game on, pretty boy,” you say, challenging him to his little game.

“Let’s start with the steak,” you say, motioning for him to hand it over to you; he hops up and hands you the steak, watching you open the package and slowly place it into the pan.

“How do you like your steak done, hon?” you ask, all your attention on the pan; you miss Bucky's face drop at the pet name, blush making its way across his cheeks; he clears his throat.

“Um, medium, well, please,” he blurts out.

“Hand me 2 tablespoons of butter, please,” you say, pointing at the butter on the counter.

“Yes, chef,” Bucky says jokingly; you giggle at the joke; Bucky is mentally high-fiving himself.

“Slight problem, I don’t know what tablespoons are,” he admits

“What? Really?” you ask, looking at him in disbelief.

“I’ve never cooked a day in my life, Y/N; that’s why we’re doing this,” he says nonchalantly.

“Okay, tbsp means tablespoons right here.” You grab his hand holding the knife and cut at the 2 tablespoon mark, holding onto his hand a second too long; you quickly let go of his hand.”

“Alright, hand me that plate; we’ll take the steaks out and then add mushrooms next,” you say confidently; you’re in your element, an area you absolutely thrive in.

“Here are your mushrooms,” he says, opening the package and adding them to the pan.

“Okay, let's add the mushrooms in and stir until tender; at that point, we’ll add the broth and heavy whipping cream,” you say slowly, making sure Bucky absorbs everything you say.

“Okay, when can I get you to hold my hand again?” he asks.

“After dinner,” you say playfully, bumping him lightly with your elbow.

“Oh, I’m gonna hold you to that,” he flirts back, bumping you back playfully.

“Next, let’s bring this to boil until the sauce thickens; it shouldn't take too long, 1-2 minutes tops,” you say, slowly stirring; this time, Bucky puts his hand over yours, helping you mix the sauce; you smile bashfully and lean into him.

“Okay, last thing, we’re almost there!” you say excitedly. “We’ll add the steaks back into the pan, let them heat up and get coated in the sauce, add chives for garnish, and boom, we’re done,” you say clearly.

“Aw, but I loved this educational cooking show,” he teases playfully.

“Good thing we’re doing this again,” you say happily, happy at the thought of doing this again.

You carefully add the steak and mushrooms next to the mashed potatoes you prepared the night before.

“Grab the wine glasses for will ya Buck, they're in the cabinet above the sink, on the top shelf,” you say, wholly focused on plating the food.

“I’ll set these on the table,” Bucky says, walking toward the table with the wine glasses.

“Okay, thank you,” you shout from the kitchen, satisfied with how the food looks. You walk the food to the table where Bucky has poured the wine and waits patiently.

“I’m so excited to try this,” you beam, joy evident in your face.

“To our first time cooking together.” Bucky holds his glass up, and you smile and clink your glasses together.

“Let’s dig in,” you say, seating done, and take your first bite.

“Ugh”

“Ugh,” you and Bucky shout simultaneously, both laughing.

“This is so good, oh my god,” you say proudly.

“We did a good job,” Bucky chirps, smiling from ear to ear at you.

“We really did,” you giggled, “Next, I wanna try pot roast!” you say, already thinking of the next time.

You and Bucky lean back in your chairs, absolutely stuffed.

“Ugh, 10 out of 10.” Bucky looked pleased. You get up and attempt to grab Bucky’s dish, but he pulls it away and quickly grabs yours.

“Absolutely not! I’ll do the dishes,” he bellows.

“No, Bucky! You’re the guest. You can’t do that,” you exclaim, trying to grab the dishes, but Bucky uses his height to render your attempts useless.

“No way, you did most of the cooking. The least I could do is the dishes,” he says matter-of-factly, walking back into the kitchen and running the water.

“Okay, let’s both do them, yeah?” you ask, hopefully.

“Okay, but only because you’re so cute,” he says, squinting at you playfully.

Bucky washes the dishes, and you rinse and dry them off like a well-oiled machine; you finish in no time.

“Okay, I think I should head home,” Bucky says sadly; he doesn’t want it to end.

“Aww, okay, Buck, let me walk you out,” you say, grabbing his hand and leading him to the door.

“I had so much fun, Buck. We have to do this more often,” you say eagerly, leaning against the door frame, sweetly running your thumb over Bucky's knuckles.

“See you later, Bucky.” You give his hand a light squeeze; Bucky grips your hand tightly and pulls you in; your lips meet; he tenderly kisses you and caresses your chin until you both pull away for air.

“I’ll see you later, Y/N,” he kisses your cheek sweetly; he strides into his apartment and closes the door softly; you’re left staring at his door with a broad smile.

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stxrvel · 9 months

Text

one of those days

summary: Bucky tries to comfort you after a hard day, but something goes wrong.

pairing: bucky barnes x f!reader

words: +2k

warnings: mentions of death, descriptions of blood and panic attacks, no happy ending.

note: hello guys!!! im really happy i got to finished this today bc it's been in my drafts for days and i didn't know how to approach it, but i think i did it how i wanted. please let me know what you think!! i love reading all of your comments <3. thank u for reading and i hope you all enjoy it!!

You couldn't remember the last time you'd left your room. Maybe it had been days or maybe months, time no longer reigned in your world as logically as before. The gray clouds had not disappeared, they still hung in the sky as if time had stopped on that fateful day, as if you were repeating it and every day you were waiting for someone to come from behind to tell you that something terrible had happened.

As you no longer differentiated one day from the other, it was very difficult to continue trying to lead a normal life. The people around you were moving as usual, happy and sharing together, but you couldn't remember the last time you had felt joy in your life. The pain had become a constant and there were some days when you couldn't even remember why.

That was one of those days, lying on a beach chair on the rooftop of the building where you lived. Sometimes you couldn't remember why you didn't sleep at the Complex anymore. That was one of those days.

“Y/N?”

You didn't move from the chair, but for the first time in days you allowed yourself to crack a smile.

“Bucky.”

“What are you doing here? It looks like it's going to rain.”

“It's quieter up here.”

Bucky moved to sit on the chair next to you, his body facing yours, but you didn't dare look at him, like every time he came. You were afraid to see him, afraid that he might see how you really felt if he looked into your eyes, that he might see what you really thought when he wasn't around.

“How was the mission?”

“As usual,” he replied a few seconds later, weighing whether or not to humor you. “Smooth and quick. Steve sends his regards.”

“He should come over instead of doing that,” you suggested with a forced half-smile, your cheeks falling into place too quickly because they weren't used to do that anymore.

“He should, but you know he has to do all the mission reports. It's so boring.”

Your lips curled up, with a lot of memories of the grimaces on Bucky's face when he had to take care of those reports.

“Must have been the best day of your life when Fury took that task off your hands.”

“No,” Bucky reneged almost instantly and his body shifted to be a little closer, so much so that you could see him through your peripheral vision, but you still didn't want to see him, “the best day of my life was when I met you.”

“Bucky…” you grumbled, half embarrassed. Looking up at the sky, you could still feel your neck and cheeks heat up from shame.

“What, how long have we been together already and you still feel embarrassed when I say those things?”

You could barely let out a laugh, the weight on your heart becoming a little lighter.

“You can tell I don't do it that often. I've got to change that.”

“Don't start, Bucky.”

The man next to you let out a laugh, his figure briefly disappearing from your field of vision and you quickly felt your heart rise up into your throat until he spoke again.

“How are you, honey?”

You let the air out of your lungs in a heavy exhale. You could have felt a little calmer knowing he was still there, but you knew the direction the conversation was going to take and it kept your shoulders tense. As much as you wanted to relax around him, whenever he touched on that subject you didn't end up very well. Some days you couldn't remember why.

“I'm fine, Buck.”

“You sure?”

“Very sure.”

“And why have you been eating so badly?”

You frowned. “I haven't been-”

“You eat twice a day and most of the time you just order take-out.”

Your hands clenched the armrests of the chair. Sooner than ever, like every time, you felt the air suffocate you. With your chest compressed, you felt breathing in was getting harder and harder. You didn't want to bring up that subject again, not because of how it had ended last time. You wanted to keep talking about trivial things, you wanted him to keep making jokes, to keep making you blush. You wanted him to…

“I'm fine, Bucky. And if you can't believe that, at least believe that I'll try to be.”

“I trust you, doll. It's just that lately you haven't been taking care of yourself like you promised me.”

“I've been trying…” with forced breathing you felt like you could barely speak, and with that lump in your throat things weren't any easier. You hated getting to that point because you succumbed so fast. “I swear. Just… just… can you go back to talking about other things?”

You heard him sigh and with your hand on your heart you almost prayed that he would drop the subject for peace, for your own peace.

“You know Natasha's been calling you these days, right?”

You dropped your shoulders, mildly relieved that he decided to heed you.

“Yeah, it's just… I don't want to talk to her. I don't really want to talk to anyone.”

“Why?”

You frowned at the sky, the gray clouds taking on a darker color from the mountains. You felt like your head had broken into gaps, into fragments you couldn't put together no matter how hard you tried.

“I don't know. I don't think I remember.”

“So is it worth it for you to be mad at them and not talk to them for something you don't remember?”

“It must be something really bad, Bucky. I feel a tightness in my chest when I think about them.”

“Mmm, okay. 'S okay, doll.”

You felt the coldness of your blood evaporate and give way to warmth as his hand passed over your arm. To feel his touch, skin against skin, so real, so simple yet so maddening. You felt like you hadn't seen or touched him in months, when the mission was only a few days old. His fingers moved in lines over your skin, so soft and so loving that you sensed the urge to cry burning behind your eyes.

“How are you?”

For some reason, asking him that question almost made you burst into tears.

“When are you going to move in with me? You know I'm tired of asking you.”

Bucky was silent for a few seconds, the brush over your arm becoming a little slower and sloppier.

“Soon, honey.”

“You always say that.”

“It's an answer after all, isn't it?”

“But it's not enough. I want you to come. I want to sleep with you. I want to spend my days with you because I don't know… I don't know what I would do without you.”

Your voice broke as you finished speaking and the tears you were trying to hold back were about to overflow from your eyes. The dark sky, threatening terrible weather, was now just a bunch of blobs. A storm looked insignificant compared to the possibility of not being able to have a future together with the man you loved, together with the love of your life.

His hand tightened around your forearm and you heard him sigh.

“I'll come soon, Y/N, I promise. And we'll live together, and we'll do all those things you've always told me about.”

“You remember them?”

“Of course!” he sounded almost offended by the question. “We have to do a picnic on this rooftop. We also have to bake a pizza at midnight. We have to adopt two puppies. And a cat…”

“You have to propose to me on this rooftop after a big romantic dinner,” you interrupted him, with a goofy lovelorn grin despite the wetness that surrounded your cheeks.

“I already did that, doll.”

“Oh, you did?”

“Don't you remember?”

Bucky's hand moved over your arm forward, his fingers brushing your skin almost superficially sending shivers throughout your body. He stopped when he had his hand between yours, which he lifted to show you a silver band that shimmered despite the cloudy weather.

“You haven't even taken off your ring.”

“And why would I take it off?” you frowned, looking intently at the ring that adorned your finger. Surprisingly you began to remember, or perhaps imagine, a grand wedding and the way that same hand that held yours had placed that ring on you as an eternal promise in front of all your friends and family.

You remembered your smile and the euphoric feeling you felt after kissing him, when he lifted you up in the air with a smile he was trying to hold back just so he could keep kissing you.

It had been a long time since you kissed him. You had almost forgotten what his lips felt like.

“So, we're married.”

“Yes, doll, and we were very happy.”

“We were?”

“You made me happy every day of my life, honey, I don't want you to ever forget that.”

“Bucky…?”

“And I don't want you to feel guilty anymore, Y/N. What happened wasn't your fault.”

“Bucky, why are you talking like that? What do you mean-?”

You moved, mistakenly, to where your husband stood and panic swirled in your chest.

You screamed when you saw him.

You turned your head as fast as you could, but it was done. The damage was done. And the memories started coming to you so fast that you couldn't stop screaming, coupled with the whimpering that invaded your body because the pain was too strong. Seeing him like this, remembering what had happened was too much.

“No! No!” you screamed when you felt his hands around you again.

His face was bloodied, just as you had last seen him. That was your last memory of him, when he was on that gurney in an empty room in the Complex, with nothing around him but some medical machines they were taking apart with which they tried to save his life. There you had seen him for the last time, after he took his last breath, after he took your life with him.

Everything after that is always a blur.

Very few days could you remember what had happened after that. In fact, there were very few days when you remembered that your husband had died. That was one of those days.

And you remembered it all, and having all those feelings inside your body, mixing inside your head at the same time was too overwhelming. You brought your hands to the sides of your head with your eyes closed, tightly shut. You shook yourself to get his hands off your body, because you couldn't stand that, because he wasn't real and it was impossible that you could feel his hands touching you when he was dead, when physically he couldn't be there.

Your crying did not stop even when you were sure there was no one touching you. The sense of infinite loss and sadness continued and persisted, as if it was his goal to leave you permanently broken.

Your hands moved over your ears, it was almost an instinct. Pounding them as if so you could discover the reality, that none of it had really happened, as if so you could stop your mind from continuing to play with your emotions and senses in that way. You became a sea of sobs and howls of pain, you almost felt like someone was opening your chest to pull your heart out.

“What's happening to her?” you heard an anguished female voice.

It was Natasha.

“Come, come here.”

That was Steve.

“Please, leave the room.”

That… you didn't know who it was.

And… room?

No, no. You were on the roof of your building. How had you moved so fast?

Argh. Your head hurt terribly.

In the middle of that crying fit, you half-opened your eyes. The first thing you noticed was a green field. Then a window. Then, rain. Just like that day. That day it was raining like the sky was falling. That day even the thunder couldn't overcome the sound of your wailing. That day, you cursed the sky and whoever was listening.

When you noticed the dark walls and that you weren't really on the rooftop, the world fell into a deafening silence.

All the other memories began to come, but now you felt numb. The memories were painful, but you couldn't identify any emotion connecting them. There was nothing. The images had no sound. They kept repeating in your head, that room with a dead and bloody man, a funeral, a dark room, screams and cries… destruction… coldness... then, a big house made of stone, people in strange clothes and then… this room. For days, for weeks. There was nothing else.

“Miss L/N, are you with me?”

You turned to look at the woman. Suddenly you felt cold surround your bones.

Of everything you had remembered only one thing remained fresh.

“He's dead,” you murmured, your lower lip trembling, more tears falling, to the woman gently holding your shoulders.

“Yes, Y/N. He passed away.”

More tears fell and again your sobs filled the silence of the room.

“But you didn't. You're here.”

“I feel like that's how it was. I feel like he took my soul with him,” your voice trembled, cracked, and you were surprised that anyone could understand what you were saying. “I'm a dead person.”

“No, you're not. You are more than alive right now. You have to fight that loss because you know this is not what he would want for you. This is not the life he would want for you after him.”

“It's just that there is no life after him,” you exclaimed to the woman, your eyes narrowed with tears. You were choking on your own irregular breathing, and though you wanted to, you couldn't regulate it.

“Yes, Y/N, yes there is, and you promised us to find it when you came here. You promised him.”

The woman touched the ring that was still on your ring finger, and you remembered all the times you stayed up all night staring at it unable to sleep.

You remembered then that… that creation in your head, that felt so real.

“I trust you, doll. It's just that lately you haven't been taking care of yourself like you promised me.”

You promised him. Yes, you remembered. The day you came to that mansion. The day when that man took you in and promised to help you find a new meaning in life.

How long must it have been since then? How long have you been stuck in your head? How long have you let yourself be dominated by your dreams?

“Yes I did…”

“Yes, you did.”

You looked at the woman again, her eyes determined and full of passion. Of confidence.

You began to feel the warmth surround your bones and only then did you realize that the room was frozen. There were tiny snowflakes on that woman's reddish hair.

“Now do you feel ready to begin?”

You hesitated, because remembering it gave you as much physical pain as if you were burying a knife straight through your heart. Maybe that would hurt less.

But there where you stood, you had only two choices. And if you were honest, you could only think of the option that would make Bucky smile proudly at you.

Maybe he would.

Maybe he did when you held that woman's hand.

You didn't know, but the only thing you could hope for was that in none of the days ahead of you, would you ever go through the suffering of one of those days again.

---

a/n. thank u for reading!! i love you all, for your support, thank u so much <3.

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