#haha. ive been gone for two days im so sorry

[thepersonever-site-updates]

worked on some audio for tpe standard! now all pages have start up audio, and credits when applicable. no i have not been working on this for the entire week go to thepersonever!

#haha. ive been gone for two days im so sorry #thepersonever.neocities.org #html #web design #audio tpe #neocities #pikmin

[tiressian]

Just to get this off my head– I can't stop thinking that shoko might have mentioned her feelings (for gojo) to geto. So it's like, she was more open to geto. She started smoking again (I'm so sorry if she didn't stop at all for me to say that lmao) after he deflected because the friend she was confiding in was gone? And she didn't know how to deal with her feelings either so, to distract herself and with her interest in medicine(?), she decided to enter med school or whatever. But then there were times she misses him, so there comes in their hang-out's like in the novel?

UGH. I wanna defend them in the court HAHAHAHAHA. Like, c'mon, shoko having that talk regarding that "being alone" then segueing her "being in love and such" out of nowhere while gojo was being shown is just— AHHHHH.

Lemme have this. 😭✊️

there there let it allll out

it sounds like youre having a rough go of things

but look

[long winded rant under the cut (not really a rant)]

shipping's supposed to be fun, give yourself permission to enjoy your ship without needing to 'justify it'. beating allegations, going to court - it's all poopie! you don't need to justify anything. you think im gonna let the x number of thinkpieces stop me?

other ships have been shipped for much less. ive shipped characters that werent even in the same fandoms! hahaha! hetero, homo, it's all fairgame to me. if i think they're hot, thats justification enough for me. if theyve never met, ill make them meet. ill put them in the same room, ill contrive a scenario. there were two beds? nope! now there is one bed! and a snowstorm! and unresolved feelings!

i love 220. i love the insight i got into Shoko. I've been dying for insight.

at the same time, i didnt need it to continue enjoying my ship, and it's nice, dont get me wrong, but if it never existed i would still be here writing for the ship.

canon or no canon, i ship it.

because it's fun.

i dont care what the consensus is, because the consensus has never dictated how much fun i have. i dictate how much fun i have

and im having a blast, im giving myself permission. you dont need it from me, but here, look: im giving you permission

what are they gonna do, take my laptop from me? hahaha!

personally i just block the main tags so that it doesn't pop up in my For You thingy. it's been 400 days since ive seen The Discourse and i know peace like you wouldnt believe. im not debating anyone. protip haha.

#answered asks #satoshoko #satosho #im putting it in the ship tags in case anyone is feeling the sads! #if satosho has a million fans i am one of them! #if satosho has ten fans then i am one of them! #if satosho has 1 fan then that is me! #if satosho has 0 fans then that means i am no longer on earth! #dont feel like you gotta write a thesis for your ship #if it sparks you joy then cool #at the same time dont feel like you have to justify your place in fandom #theres plenty of space for all of us #blocking isnt a moral thing #it's a boundary thing :)

[cryptcreechur]

hey i know this is sort of an. out of nowhere question. but i cant find anywhere else and scientific resources just. seem to ignore whatever this is so im kinda desperate lol.

i keep having premonitions in my dreams. im not actively doing anything to have premonitions but talking to and doing some readings with my tarot and playing card decks. i barely use my crystals for anything but charging and cleansing the two of them. i cleanse my house with sage sometimes but i dont do any spellcraft besides that. the most i do to open up mentally is mess around trying to tell my friends how many fingers theyre holding up over discord and i only get that right like 30% of the time lol

but before my grandmother died, i asked my playing cards if her most recent decline in health was the sign of the end, and he gave me a definitive yes- 3 days later, she's gone. i appreciated the warning and thanked him for the help even if it did hurt really bad in the moment to pull that ace of spades and hear him say "yes, im so sorry." just recently, i had a dream about going to my grand aunt's funeral. a day later, my mom calls me and tells me she's gone- i didnt say anything about this dream since i was hoping it... yknow. was just a dream. didnt ask my cards about it. i didnt know her very well and hadnt been reminded of her in a while, so it freaked me out when i got the call and just.... knew already.

ive been having incidents like this happen in increasing frequency and its starting to get concerning since im not really the most in tune with my spiritual side so i dont get why this is happening? id really appreciate any second opinion, and i thank you in advance for just. reading this, haha

first of all, please don't feel like you're doing something wrong or out of the ordinary by having these. while it is scary and confusing, it seems like it's natural for you. i have premonition dreams as well, though theyve declined in frequency as my mental health has declined as well, but mine started coming around a lot when people or pets were about to die, or when something life-changing was going to happen. i was a preteen when i remember them starting and being frequent, so i definitely wasn't doing any intentional spellwork back then - it just happened.

premonitions are something that can occur with ease for some people, or with training and practice with others. that's how all clairsence works.

unfortunately, i dont know how to stop or lessen premonitions - the only thing that's ever worked for me was getting extremely depressed and on the edge of suicide, so i definitely don't recommend that. at all. but, i don't think you should try to shut it out. it can be scary, especially with what you're getting right now, and i understand.

journal your dreams. all of them. every morning as soon as you wake up and have a sip of water, bust out your nearest empty spiral bound notebook and write everything you can remember. even if its only one thing, or nothing. or a whole lot of something. i found that often, the act of writing out your dream can help you remember it even better.

dream journaling helps you keep track of what you know and what you don't, and you can practice dream interpretation if you feel like it (a lot of my premonitory dreams weren't so cut and dry as seeing a funeral, it would be something deeply symbolic, like a once dead deer suddenly rising and bursting into ash). aside from that, dream journaling can help improve memory and focus, and might even help you learn how to lucid dream.

also, i would consider asking your parents (if able) if they have or had premonitory dreams as well. when mine were first appearing, i was scared and worried, and i asked my mum about it, and she told me she has premonition dreams too, as did her mum, and her mum before her. it runs in our family, and when i spoke to friends that also claimed premonitory dreams, in ran in their families too. perhaps the elders in your family have some advice as well. premonitory dreams aren't inherently a spiritual thing, or limited to one spirituality - they happen in all religions and all walks of life whether spiritual or not.

thank you for sending me this ask, i hope this helped. please feel free to message me or send more asks if you have any other questions.

blessed be <3

#premonitions #premonitory dream #dream interpretation #dreams #magick #witchcraft #baby witch #witch community #witches of tumblr #heathenry #pagan witch #norse paganism #paganism

[moomoomooing]

mild rant? mostly thoughts :)

yk ive just not been a fan of how quickly my mood and possible depression is flipping from eberythings fine and im only a little stressed but its ok! to jesus fuck let me rot (projects and deadlines are suddenly piled up and its overwhelming, but i also feel like this when i have nothing i can do)

i try to keep on a shower schedule cause of my class times (i have night classes half of the days so i shower on my off days) but it means i gotta be nasty for a day on sunday till i shower that night. and i never have the willpower to go to the studio feeling nasty,,, even if it wouldve been great to get work done and satiate the restlessness i get from being in my dorm all day

but i didnt and now im plagued with guilt and more stress/ anxiety yippees

on another note my roommate is really REALLY good at finding ALL of my triggers for anxiety or fight or flight responses. so far they nailed using my mirror/being TOO close to my belongings without asking (they eventually asked and i gave permission out of being nice but i severely dislike it and it makes me hyperaware of everything she does when i hear her close to my dresser). they got my i will tense up and not breathe till its over response to alarm sounds (i hate them theyre incredibly anxiety inducing and i always wake up before my alarm usually out of fear. thankfully now my alarms a last resort/reminder of time if i dont wake up early). and!! they let the door slam (boo loud noises), are constantly on a call they often dont wear earbuds for and talk really loudly half the time, or is on call past 12 am (i feel intrusive and also please i cant sleep if youre on call)

theres also other general icks that are hopefully getting better? im noticing less of smth that i hate that they do (its a not cleaning after yourself type deal) but it could just be coincidence

oh also im trying to apply for jobs (remote part-times or internships) and frankly im scared. the reason it took me so long to get a job in highschool was also straight fear and anxiety lmao

i would love money tho (pssst i have commissions open :D)

OW SHARP RINGING NOISE WHERE DID YOU COME FROM????????? ALL OF THE WHITE NOISE DISSAPEARED AND ITS ONLY THAT

anyways i got another strike of hypersensitive skin??? no idea what causes it but it made the underneath of my forearm feel like i scraped it across concrete. 0/10 i didnt have a pleasant showering experience

oh on a better note being so far removed from my family and the fact we basically never call or text has been quite freeing

its like when i was actually at public highschool and had agency over myself in a way i didnt have when my mom was around (basically her presence was usually STRESS)

on a lesser note i havent been talking with my two other friends (ill call em the trio, them plus me) and its been kinda radio silence from everyone? i havent exactly been great either but my infrequent requests for vcs are usually ignored or not responded too which sucks. it makes me more paranoid than id like to be

our time difference definitely makes it way harder too tho, im ahead by a few hours. ik weve gone months without talking before then picked it right back up, but im always scared during the radio silence anyways

im always scared and curious abt other ppls opinions on me, usually the ppl i consider friends. ik one of my friends likes me? but their friends (the 4 of us will be rooming together next year, theyre also technically my friends but my usually point of contact with them is through my friend) i cant tell how much they like me? its probably my unfamiliarity with them but it makes me nervous for no reason

anyways if you actually read all of this, sorry for taking away your time? i reccomend soft gepard x sampo (hsr) fics to soothe the mind, theyre cute.

also hey haha if youre one of the two friends, literally the nickels, are reading this? erase it from your mind please and thanks

#maybe thinking abt giving your cat a signed consent form to allow them to eat your corpse should you die and the baby has no food #isnt exactly a normal and perfectly sane thought #but what if the baby needs it bc someone tried to be mean abt it :( #jesus ok maybe i should fight with my mom again for some diagnosis #i got told that my level of anxiety is totally normal and i just need to deal with it

[toadkisses]

alistairs years in review part three

alistair is continuing his public journaling; the gist is i am writing down a summary of the life events that have gone on in the past two years or so, since i used to lifepost a lot more on here. its been nice reflecting especially since i can see a bend up ahead where my life will change again somehow.

this entry will be about the medical adventures ive been on including misdiagnosed diabetes and hrt stories.

part one about dog grooming school / part two about meeting my wife

this will contain discussion of eating disorders, suicide, and medical stuff! be warned :K oh and me coming out to my family

i dont have a clear "where we left off" point like i did last time! the beginning of this saga is in july or august of 2021. rose and i had been dating for a few months but already called each other our wife. i begin working in a corporate dog grooming salon, and i like it well enough; my manager can be taxing at times but i get along well with my coworkers.

i came out to my parents as trans right before starting the job, and it didnt go as badly as it does for some people but didnt go as well as i dreamed?

it was impulsive. i told my mom i was trans, and i thought things were maybe okay? rose was there, my mom and i cried a lot, and my mom told me i had to be in charge of my dad.

i felt sick to my stomach because coming out was the first thing i could remember doing entirely for myself and my comfort without prioritizing other people. rose and i went and got food so i could collect myself some.

after getting home, i was asked to come talk to both my parents. it felt more standoffish? like i was in trouble? i told my dad and said i would answer any questions they had. and my mom was kind of weird like "thats a big thing to just toss out here" and i was like "well i feel really really really bad making problems like this" and she said that i wasnt making problems but i also didnt get like "you have trusted us with this information we love you"

i actually had an appointment with my shrink the next day and my mom came with, where doctor confirmed gender stuff is something ive been talking about for years and its not just out of nowhere. and i cried a lot about how bad i felt for having to come out and how i was worried about disappointing my parents etc etc

and i think for a little bit it helped, like i was able to be in the same room as my parents without wanting to run but we had a meeting all three of us that i dont remember a lot of besides my dad accidentally saying im not a boy and my therapist exclusively using she and birthname for me. i didnt feel like i had anyone on my side and i remember thinking about trying to find somewhere to crash until i could get an apartment because i was so upset. which i didnt do because it wasnt economically feasible haha. but yeah it went really poorly and i refused to tell them my preferred name because i was so hurt. i actually never told them! they know it from like mail i got but we have not had the conversation.

i actually went back to my shrink a while later and she lead with the amazing blunder of "yeah, when we finished up last time i was worried 'i wonder if shes never coming back'. oh, oops, ali im so sorry" like GIRL you REALLY fumbled this one right out the gate

anyway i did tell my mom i was going to look into getting hrt but besides that we have had very few conversations about Alistair Gender. things are normal, im able to be around them which is good because i live here, they try not to call me overtly feminine things? we still do activities like we did before. it was sweet that apparently they had a conversation about shutting down any possible trans jokes their friends might make when we went to visit them (to clarify NOT jokes at my expense, they dont know and would be very abashed if they did happen to make one at my expense, they were preparing in case the topic came up in abstract and someone cracked a joke, that they would make clear they dont approve of being a jackass about it. end clarification)

a year later uhhhhh coming out is still defined by regret but different than it used to be? like instead of my previous "why did i do this i feel so bad for making a fuss about myself", now i wish i hadnt come out because i was and am happy with the family dynamics we have, and realized that like its not disingenuous for me to be different people for different people? like of course my mom interacts with and experiences and perceives me differently than my brother or my girlfriend does, but the person they all know is still me? and i feel bad because i put my mom in a difficult position because she didnt want to out me by talking to her friends about this big emotional event, so she was left to deal with it on her own. and maybe ill feel differently someday but its how i feel now which i guess is why its good to journal it. in summation i feel like suffering for everyone could have been avoided if i had realized coming out isnt mandatory.

i need to tell them all this still and who knows when that will happen haha. especially since, after taking testosterone for 9 months, i feel like WAY more comfortable in my skin and have no desire to tell any other family members or coworkers about gender stuff, because it doesnt make me uncomfortable to be seen as a woman. ive actually been wondering if 14 year old alistair was right all along and im just a transmasc lesbian? food for thought. not what this post is about.

anyway. BACKGROUND INFORMATION DONE GOD THIS IS GONNA BE SO LONG.

i went to an informed consent clinic and the doctor is super cool, like him a lot. they took bloods from me. my blood glucose was high but i had eaten like right before.

next appointment. i get the prescription for testosterone but they took another non fasting glucose and it was still higher than normal, so they draw blood to check my A1C. i also didnt really uh get taught how to do my injections? because my doctor told a nurse "he needs his flu shot and instructions on how to do his injections", and she uh. just assumed that i could not be the aforementioned "he". so i was checking out and said like "nobody told me how to do injections", the receptionist calls my doctor over like "nobody told her how to do her injections", he tracks down a different nurse who spends 60 seconds with me and tells me to watch a youtube video. it is worth noting that this IS specifically a pride clinic that advertises itself as such? spoiler alert i did wind up filing a formal complaint like "i understand why im getting misgendered, but im worried about how it might impact the wrong patient and it DID impact my quality of care" after i had a prescription issue and they were like "she needs her testosterone filled"

i got my A1C results back and it was a 7, which put me past prediabetes and in the diabetic range. i was leaving on a trip to visit friends in texas in like two days, and the only medical person who could see me to tell me what everything meant was a nurse practitioner.

it was a really dreadful experience ;_; she told me to cut out soda and desserts, watch what i eat, and theyd retest my A1C in three months to see if i was still elevated. and i told her i dont do soda or desserts, and that i was worried about really closely monitoring my food, (specifically checking nutritional labels and calorie counting), because of my history with restrictive eating and purging. and i asked if she had any advice on how to avoid a relapse like that and she honest to god told me "dont look at that part of the label"

i also asked if i should get my thyroid checked because i was already following all the diet rules they recommended, was active at my job, and had no family history of diabetes. BUT I DO HAVE A FAMILY HISTORY OF THYROID DISORDERS. and she was like "yeah sometimes it just happens. probably dont need to check those"

to add insult to injury the trip to texas was stupendously awful and i am not friends with them anymore!

i had my first testosterone shot on september 20th 2021. it was really cool.

when i got home from our trip, i stopped eating bread, pasta, rice, milk, and anything sweet, since i was told "carbs bad" but not given any guidance beyond that? so i stuck to a diet of like. salad with olive. chicken and beef. cheese sometimes. beans. maybe an apple BUT NOT TOO MUCH FRUIT THATS SUGAR.

i saw an endocrinologist in january, and my A1C had dropped into prediabetic range. she referred me to a dietician since i told her unfortunately she also said i should write down "i hate ice cream" whenever i craved it, which. wasnt great for my eating disorder brain. she also took me off my antidepressants because some of them can cause insulin resistance. this was really unfortunate because come to find out, mine is not one of those.

after three weeks of awful antidepressant withdrawal symptoms, i saw the dietician. and like i feel bad being like "these people didnt help me" because they were all really pleasant but God it was not helpful to be given a mass produced booklet about how to lose weight and fix your bloods, when i was already following a more restrictive diet than they recommended and at a bmi they liked. and i told her going in like "I HAVE AN EATING DISORDER, IM WORRIED THIS WILL MAKE ME RELAPSE" and she still gave me the calorie counts. ;_;

the next day at work i think i honestly had a mental breakdown? i still groomed all my dogs but i was openly crying while i was doing it, my coworkers were really worried. i was the most suicidal ive been in years. i didnt see why i should continue to live if i had to work at a very stressful job, get yelled at by customers every day (you know how retail is), not get paid enough to live independently, and track what i ate every day while fighting a relapse. i wasnt even ABLE to take a lunch most days because my manager had the habit of overbooking us.

i narrowly avoided being taken to the ER. my Big Manager was actually really cool about me taking a few days off until i could see my shrink for Emergency Appointment Alistair Is In Crisis. i was at home for a couple days.

then a very close friend attempted suicide and eventually passed. i dont feel comfortable giving more detail than that because he was a fairly private person.

i resigned from my job. i lost 20 pounds because i stopped eating. i stopped seeing my shrink. longtime alistair fans may remember that puberty really fucked up my mental health, so out of desperation, i stopped taking my testosterone in hopes that i might get ANY amount of relief. and it did take me from "lying in bed trying to figure out how to kill myself without destroying my girlfriend and family" to "hoping i get killed in a freak accident". i was also able to start eating a bit more regularly, and i wasnt restricting any specific foods.

three months post-breakdown i was finally able to see a nurse practitioner to see what antidepressant i could take without messing up my sugars. turns out the antidepressant i could take was the one i HAD BEEN ON. so started that back up. nurse was really great, she was interested in having my thyroid checked as well as my A1C. and it turned out my A1C was back in normal range, but my thyroid stuff was abnormal and likely causing the blood sugar issues! fuck me running! and i did confirm with hrt doc that testosterone wouldnt make those abnormal, if anything it would just make t less effective.

still figuring out what to do about thyroid stuff but cool to know we could have maybe avoided a lot of this food suffering if theyd agreed to test my thyroid when i asked.

i dont seriously consider killing myself anymore! which is great! and while i still monitor what im eating and my weight, i DO eat three meals a day again and have stopped losing weight.

ive regressed in a lot of ways though. like im a good driver, i drove 3000 miles to texas and back without incident, ive navigated chicago traffic, i know what im doing. but even driving to the store is paralyzing, i have anxiety attacks trying to drive through town. talking on the phone is hard again. i have a lot of difficulty being around strangers, and being in public drains me very quickly. im always expecting someone to yell at me. the nurse who prescribed me my stuff referred me to a therapist for ptsd, but he kind of told me to go see my old shrink since ive been seeing her since i was like 14 haha.

i did go see her last month and was able to reorient some goals, what i think has been working for me vs not, etc. and i actually feel optimistic that working with her will go well? she wants me to add an anti anxiety med which i am PRAYING will help

onto more positive things. testosterone was really cool. bottom growth happened like within the first few days, which i was pumped about. my voice dropped, its not super deep but its a noticeable change. i really liked the new body hair but a lot of it went away when i had to stop :-(

like its weird the only lasting changes have been voice and bottom growth, but i feel so much more confident and happy body wise (editors note that my eating disorder stuff has always been more linked to control than physical appearance, this isnt a contradiction)

ummmmmmmmm i feel like we're caught up on my major life events. going forward...

get anxiety drug

contact job counseling

biggest stressor these days is needing a job but still being fucked up brain. im looking for help there. lets see if i find it! life goes on forever and ever and ever though. eventually something will happen. hopefully it will be good! it could be bad. but bad things keep happening and i keep living through them to new things. so i guess it has to be okay because it will be given enough time. ta-da!

#alistair talking post #god this is long #again ftr nobody has to read all this #youre allowed to! but i do it mostly for nostalgia and self reflection #not proofread ive been writing for forever

[hueningshaped]

omg my ult ults me back????🥹🥹 i'm a successful fan😎 nope i will always find a way >:D you are so ☹️☹️ i have the first update already !! i have one (1) uni friend and me and her have pretty much developed separation anxiety so we always try to get into all the same courses but this semester it didn't work in one of our courses so both of us are very much like AND i am very unlucky with my schedule because i have uni every day now and it's so tiring because 4/5 days i only have class for 1.5 hours and i live a little further away so i have to commute for twice as long as i'm actually there😐 i hate it here. HAVE YOU SEEN THE SEULO TEASER!!!! i almost lost my mind i need it her to drop it ASAP (whoo woo 눈앞에 눈앞에 나타나 줘) !! not you researching apple types??😭😭😭 it's literally you as #1 cutest person in the world and then 10 spaces empty😔 AHHHH i'm so happy you like the new theme i am also very much 💗💘💕💓in love💓💕💘💗 with yours!! no bc ur right beomgyu really is just SO beomgyu😣 and AHHHH 2.0 i'm happy you liked the song too :(( i really liked ioi and i only stumbled upon the news of her solo by accident but i'm so happy she finally got it, her and chungha were my biases🥹🫶🏻 omg NOOO i really hope you managed to pass ur exam (pls update me i won't be able to rest otherwise :/) and i hope the closing shift was alright too!! AND !!!!!! i forgot to ask last time (literally so vile and evil) but how is your eye i hope that stye is gone by now because it's literally been like three decades since you mentioned it😟 oooohhh i hope you get to read more literature soon!! (plus get the sleep and rest you deserve😾) i also wanted to read a book over the summer but i procrastinated so much that i only started like two weeks ago but i had to stop again because my exams are coming up and i have to study for them which is another thing i'm procrastinating on😁👍🏻 omg the person i was during my 1d days ..... my actual dark past ..... i stanned them from early 2013 to early 2014 and then i kind of lost interest UNTIL the literal earth-shattering day that march 25, 2015 was and i started stanning them again but only until the start of 2016 because right after i started my kpop phase 🫥🫥 i haven't really been keeping up with them that much i've only listened to a few of their singles and i enjoyed the memes that followed the liam drama this year way too much😭😭 omg that first video literally one of my favorites ever i love seeing them just chilling off camera plus him incorporating head and shoulders knees and toes into his freestyle⁉️🤨 NOOOO the cheering he is so 😣😣😞😿 and omg the song!!!!! this message is already so long ur probably gonna be like bffr once you see this😭 so here is your first your second and your third link I LOVE U ALWAYS AND FOREVER!!!!!

pleaseee ur my angel but yes hehe we’re mutual ults 🥹💗 how lucky is that 🤯 awww omg an update already yay but aw im sorry also that video is so funny but in the context it’s so 💔💔💔 how disheartening 🥺 omg i hate that !!!! why can’t uni just understand and be more flexible with schedules <///3 commuting being longer than actual class time is so 0/100 would NOT recommend >:(( i hope u find time to rest throughout all this even though ik already that’s it’s difficult to make time btw actual in school and commuting and life 😮‍💨 and omg the seulo mv 😳 “i kiss your brother” SEULGI?!1!1!!3!:!: i really really love songs with a bass line as powerful as that one ~ ive yet to listen to the rest of the album / have you ?? also this is such a random question but do u buy albums or photocards ? :0 hehe anyway (pls ur the absolute cutest to ever exist and to bring meaning to the word ‘cute’) haha….. apparently i failed so terribly…. which is bad bc initially i thought i’d done better… it’s a lot to explain but haha… (you are the furthest thing from evil ARE U KIDDINGNNEME u are the kind of good that gives people hope to keep living to keep dreaming and loving and anyway) my stye went away eventually so yay! there isn’t enough time in the world is there hm 🥺 i hope we both can read books at our own leisure/whenever we want to soon 🤹 best of luck on ur exams !!!! let me know how those go (also plz get ur sleep and eat and be hydrated) omg a directioner too? 🥹 they were dark times…. almost forgot about freaking liam drama ahhh we were so happy then (well sorta hehehe) OH GOODNESS UR LINKS *hand over heart* im… 💔 yeonjun being a lookalike to the short bangs kitty im so in luv ahh and their protocol team :”) it makes me happy to know they’re taken care of and besides that they have fun with each other it warms my heart 😿😿 worlds colliding abby huening is definitely meant to be part of ive idk 😮‍💨 slayyyyy hehe sorry i feel like i didn’t say anything of substance in this reply which is absurd especially after such a pathetically long delay ☹️ during the final week of september my sister came to visit (she lives 1000 miles / 1609 km away) and i had lots of fun and when she left everything went downhill and i haven’t been well and with the little time i have to myself im just exhausted 🥺 im sorry i didn’t mean to mar this response to you not bring u anything but positivity bc u deserve the best 🥺 i withdrew from one of my classes due to how overwhelmed i was and im just trying to take each day at a time at the moment 👍👍 so i hope to be better 💌 HEY WAIT AHH DID YOU SEE UMM UMM TXT NEW HAIR COLOR?2!!2!2!;!/ APPLE, WE GOT BLOND SOOBIN!!!!! PINK TYUN!!!! BROWN 🧸 BEOMGYU!!!!! BLACK HAIRED YJ!!!!! PRINCELIKE BLACK HAIR HYUKA!!!!! at a loss of words……. please update me with ur life and with school and everything! i TRULYYYY hope things are going better and that u at least enjoy the classes u share with ur friend and that ur commutes are safe 🥺 here are ur links 📃~ this impeccable cover of beomgyu, another cover of his hahaha, this tweet, and a song (this song is so sad ive only been listening to sad music lately whoopsies) also sorry my links are lacking :( i’ll do better next time 🫶 i know i only ever give you 2% when u give me 10000% and i apologize i love u and i don’t ever wish to take u for granted 🥺 please take care always ~!! 💗❤️💗❤️💗 (tyssssssm for the pics they’re so cute and beautiful i love them)

#[❤️⭐️]—aquí te amo #ask >3< #apple my love #dream suite

[rinphoria]

omgg ive heard a lot about criminal minds, especially about Spencer (??). it seems like a really good show and i actually might give it a go too soon. i can only watch one show at a time because my brain can't process two shows at a time, but ive nearly finished the mentalist so i might try that next !!

icl, my friend thinks im a complete weirdo, but i don't like waffles or pancakes. they're not very appealing to me and i would never choose them when eating out. i quite like potato waffles though, they're beautiful !! i remember as a child my mum used to buy the smiley face shaped ones and id secretly take them out of the packet and try to eat them raw ,, i have no idea why 😭😭 i used to think i was the baddest bitch ever.

yk with the internship, i have no idea what to expect, but at the same time im excited for all the doors it opens. the company is basically a research and consultancy agency that works with big corporate clients like McDonald's and also with the public. they do research and then present their findings to the clients to try and help them become better brands and whatnot. i don't really care about the consultancy part, but i can't wait for the research aspect. im trying to go into psychology for university, and me having experience in research will hopefully (i pray that it does) give me a leg up into the research world and work placements while im an undergrad.

OMGGG I HOPE YOU HAVE THE BEST MONTH EVER BEFORE YOU MOVE BACKK !! YOU DESERVE ALL THE REST AND THE HAPPINESS AND IM PRAYING ITS AN EASY MOVE BACK !! i honestly applaud you, idk how you do it. i go camping for 2 days and im literally crying and throwing up because i miss my mum. i literally stayed up until 3am to phone her and tell her i wanted to go home 😭 you're so strong kai and i'm so so proud of you. hopefully moving back is easy and peaceful for you !! also i have so many kdramas to watch, and shows in general, but im so so slow at getting round to watching them 😫 i hope you manage to do everything youve been planning on doing within the next month !!

reconnecting with old friends makes me feel so fuzzy and warm on the inside. something about finding eachother again makes me feel like the friendship was just meant to be and that's why you both found eachother. im so so happy for you and please, feel free to let me know how the amusement park goes (only if you're comfortable with sharing of course). i love hearing about other people's days and experiences, i feel like im living vicariously through them lmaooo

IVE JUST REALISED IVE SENT A REALLY LONG ASK AND I AM SO SORRY ,, I GET SO CARRIED AWAY AND I END UP WAFFLING ABOUT THE MOST RANDOMEST THING please feel free to ignore this btw, its actually so long wtff I'm sorry about that 😭😭 anyways, thank you for sharing your day with me and i hope you have millions of more amazing days to come <33

noooo i would never ignore you!!

i def recommend criminal minds if you have space on your watch list! (it’s pretty long lol) and yes spencer is a fan fav, i really like hime but that’s bc i find intelligence attractive haha. OMG I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOURE TALKING ABOUT i haven’t had those in so long 😭😭 bad bitches ate the little smiley potatoes 😌 your internship sounds like it’ll be really interesting! i did a lot of research for my major last semester and it gave me such a headache but i also learned a ton so it really does sound like a great opportunity. i hope you learn a lot and are able to enjoy it :)

i always hate the move back to school, it can be rough lol but thank you so much!! i totally get what you mean about getting homesick, my school is two hours away from home and on the first day of my freshman year my parents had been gone for maybe three hours and i ended up calling my dad and crying on the phone bc i missed them 💀 and to think i was considering doing school out of state lol i would not have survived

ahh yeah, i was really shocked to see him again since he transferred in middle school but turns out he goes to college where we grew up. it’s been really nice catching up with him :) and i would be more than happy to tell you about the little outing bc i too love living vicariously through others haha

AHHH LIJA ILY 🫶🏽🫶🏽 thank you for indulging me, you’re a sweetheart :))

#[დ] — mailbox #ffsg0jo #sender.lija #best of luck with your internship!! #and wishing you many wonderful days too my love <3

[wnjhs]

:3c

#im going to bury this with reblogs. holy shit ive been so fucking su1c1dal lately im starting ti scare myself haha xxx #i havent slept for the last two days and i feel crazy. #i wish i could function as a normal person who doesn't isolate completely randomly #haha internalised ableism. im never gonna be fuckin normal im literally neurodivergent #im at my wits end i dont know what to do #just been feeling the all consuming need to die. #nothing makes me feel okay all i do is hurt people #i try so hard to change and be better but its always the same shit every time and im so sick of myself i just want it to end #i want it to go away #it hurts so fucking badly i want to go away #i cant handle being alive i want everything to stop i want o be gone #im sorry #everyone in my life deserves better bcs i never change and people r bound to outgrow me no matter how hard i fucking try to be normal and #keep up sopcial interaction without burning out within a day #anyways thinking heavily about leaving #maybe i wont see the end of this year but thats okay #its what i deserve ive come to term with it #i just want the pain to stop #and the pain i cause orhers to stop too

[soulwillower]

i have loved your roommate headcanon series for a long time. i know you are on a break so when you come back would you want to write another part? i just can't get enough i love new girl and the losers

dude yes! sorry i took so long but im glad to write more :) this series has been rly fun haha i also love new girl

also i haven't written headcanons in about half a year so bear with me warnings: mentions of sex, mentions of reader x bill, some drinking, reader and losers are 21+

not sure if ive mentioned this one before bc now this list has been v long

but u get stood up on a date at a rly nice restaurant one time

and u tell the guys but u tell them in a casual way, texting them n saying ur gonna finish ur glass of wine n then just go home

they were clubbing that night

(richie insisted on having a guys night)

but they want to make u feel better

so they show up at the restaurant, the fancy one, wearing their stupid clubbing outfits

(richie had worn the ugliest button-up ever)

ur crying bc ur so embarrassed about the date not showing

everyone at the restaurant knew you'd been stood up, esp the waitress

and she wasnt being v nice abt it

so richie decides hes gonna start singing "time of my life"

in the middle of the dining room

ppl are staring at him now,

and bill and stan join in but stan doesn't know the words and bill is only singing a terrible, unmatched harmony

it rly makes u feel better

bc u cant stop laughing

u join in

but then the restaurant kicks u out and bans u for life

so u guys buy a cheap bottle of wine and go home and bake a cake and get wine drunk

yeah ok also

one day stan comes tearing into the bathroom where u and bill are brushing ur teeth

he just screams "SPOT! THERE'S A PARKING SPOT!" then sprints out of the apartment

u guys run to follow him bc u guys thought u didn't have a garage spot

sure enough there is one parking spot with ur apartment number on it that was covered by a dumpster

until stan found it

this sparks a vicious war between you, stan, bill, and richie to decide who deserves the parking spot

ur all debating at ur dining room table and then richie gets a notification and springs up

"well, the sex window opened up. gonna go park my car in her spot." richie says with a wink

as he leaves he's smirking and you're all calling for him to put money in the douchebag jar

he does it reluctantly

"i still want the spot!"

once he's gone, stan turns to you two, "well that leaves three of us."

then its silent bc u all rly want the spot

stan and u make eye contact

and something clicks between u two

u know bill will be easier to break than stan and u know he knows it too

u know, 'the enemy of my enemy is my friend'

after several moments of silence staring at bill, you and stan finally break him

"ALRIGHT" bill yells, "good job guys,"

u and stan high five in victory as bill mutters, "how do you two care about things so much?"

"you know what this means, y/n? bill denbrough is now a swing vote." stan says

bill moans in contest

"NO way."

but he becomes the Decider (much to his protest)

u decide that u will try and seduce him into giving u the spot

cheap trick? yeah

but it nearly works anyways

ur wearing his sweatshirt and shorts, putting on your best show

bill's like "i'm confused, y/n"

bc its obvious ur acting weird

as you parade around his bedroom while he works

"are you flirting with me to get the spot?" he asks after a minute

u insist u arent

but bill shrugs, "the parking spot is yours y/n"

ur enthralled

later that day, stan is acting weird to bill too

"who wants an ice cold, frosty pilsner" stan says as he hands bill a beer

bill takes it, clueless

"i know you haven't chosen, yet, but i just wanted to say thanks, man." stan says

bill spits the beer back into the cup, "what for." he knows what stan is doing bc u did it earlier

stan's like 'ik ur gonna give the spot to me, but i appreciate u keeping up the act our of respect for y/n'

bill's just like "the spot's going to y/n"

stan lunges for bill and takes back the beer "gimme it!"

"i was just trying to be a gentleman"

bottom line, things get worse when bill decides that since u both tried to trick him, he deserves the spot

so u guys all start arguing again and end up staying all night in the parking garage

bc u guys said whoever leaves the spot first loses

at some point stan pees himself

and the only reason u dont quit out of hunger is bc u remembered the candy u had in ur pocket to eat

ur all screaming at each other and stan suddenly just screams "gimme the spot or i'll kill you all!"

so after that u decide u need to stop being immature and that you'd all decide in the morning

but in the end

richie ends up with the parking spot

bc he came home from his hookup and just parked his car there

lol

ALSO

going to a wedding with all of them

actually soo many weddings bc ur at the age where all ur friends are getting engaged

bev and the guys all insist u have to go as richie's date

bc he has a crazy ex who will b at the wedding and he always backslides and gets back together with them

and u pretend to b richies gf

its so fun

yes i love roomate!losers

tag list: @decafcoffew @michaelwheelers @deadlyperfectionist1228 @kmt123whatsthetea

#losers club x reader #losers x reader #richie tozier x reader #bill denbrough x reader #stanley uris x reader #stanley uris headcanons #bill denbrough headcanons #richie tozier headcanons

[books-and-catears]

Im actually unsure if ive sent a request already (if i did im sorry i have1 terrible memory T-T;;)

But if not would it be okay to request for an GN! MC who the brothers realize was a big idol back in the human world but they never said that to them? Like maybe they found through magazines or internet or smth?

Hope this is okay and have a good day!!

Awww honey don't apologize! Also thank you so much for the request! You have an amazing day too!

This is such a interesting and hilarious ask!This is going to be super fun to write hehehe :3

(Oh and just a general fact for anyone who comes across my blog I try to always make my MC gender neutral unless a specific gender is requested.)

Lucifer

Lucifer: For some reason there have been a lot of attempts to summon me from the human realm.

MC: Oh? That really works?

Lucifer: Well not always but we occasionally they get it right. But that's the not the issue here.

MC: Oh did they ask for something weird?

Lucifer: I got 22 summons. 18 of them had your name in their demands. And I checked their identities, they are not related to you, in any way. Mind explaining what's going on?

MC: *embarassed* I was slightly drunk on stage one day and might have told the people as a joke that if I ever went missing, they could try asking the devil for me.

Lucifer: Your people? Do you have cult up there?

MC: Well cult is a strong word. Fanbase is the more commonly used term...

Lucifer: How many people?

MC: Um...

Lucifer: How many more times will I be summoned MC?

MC: Um a few million times?

Lucifer: *exasperated dad noises*

Mammon

Mammon: MC what is net worth?

MC: Eh I'm not sure but maybe sum of assets or something

Mammon: YOU HAVE 20 MILLION WORTH OF ASSETS?

MC: Ah well I don't really accept it as mine cause there's a lot of people involved so I signed it over to my parents anyway.

Mammon: BUT HOW DO YOU HAVE THE ASSETS?

MC: 5 years worth of good record and merch sells are enough for it suppose?

Mammon: Records...MC you were a famous singer in the human world?!

MC: Ah well idol is what they called us. We had to dance a lot too.

Mammon: HOW COME NONE OF US KNEW THIS?! MC THIS IS HUGE WE CAN EVEN MARKET YOUR SKILLS HERE AND WE WILL BE RICH!

MC: *sigh*....this is why none of you knew.

Leviathan

Levi: MC can I tell you something strange?

MC: How strange are we talking?

Levi: Like when I saw you for the first time, you looked awfully familiar.

MC: Ah do I resemble some character you like?

Levi: An idol actually. There was this human world group that was a big hit for five years! But then they disbanded two years ago. You look like my favourite one. *Pointing to old poster*

MC: *looks at themself in ridiculous blue hair* Ahahhaa thanks Levi although I gotta admit that is my least favourite look.

Levi: You even have the same name as them it's almost uncanny- wait. Did you say 'MY least favourite look'?

MC: Guilty as charged....

Levi: YOU'RE ACTUALLY MC! THE MC! THE IDOL MC! *falls on the ground*

MC: Levi you okay?! Calm down it's-

Levi: MC IS IN MY ROOM!? MC IS SITTING NEXT TO ME?! MC IS LIVING IN THE SAME HOUSE AS ME!? MC GOES TO MY SCHOOL!? MC IS MY BEST FRIEND?!

MC: Yes Levi...Yes to all of them now calm down please! You're going to have heart attack!

Satan

Satan: MC come here for a minute would you?

MC: Yes, Satan?

Satan: So I tried to procure some human world magazines for Asmo and ended up going through them myself and *flips to a page and pointing towards an old picture of you* by any chance is this you?

MC: Haha didn't expect you to recognize me with that get up.

Satan: So when were you going to tell us you're about your fame in the human world?

MC: Does it even matter? It has been two years since I've last been on stage I'm sure people have forgotten now.

Satan: The recent article disagrees. *Reads from magazine* "MC hasn't been active in any of their social media accounts recently. While they did tend to go on long breaks of inactivity, this hiatus has been stretching for 5 months. They haven't even appeared in any of their fellow member's pictures either. An interview with one of the members said, 'They haven't even been answering texts nor calls. Their parents tell us they've gone away for a while but won't tell us where."

MC: Jesus I leave for six months and they make a whole mystery novel about me.

Satan: Well it's rather fun to keep the people on their toes. I can think of ways to fuel this fire.

MC: Satan no-

Asmodeus

Asmo: *comes running into your room* MC! How could you not tell me!?

MC: Eh? Tell you what?

Asmo: That you had a partner in the human world already?! And that you both are a FAMOUS POWER COUPLE!?

MC: Eh? Who said I was-

Asmo: Don't you lie to me! *holds up an edit playing on his phone* Look at these two people under the same umbrella! You're the one holding it aren't you!? Who are they MC? Do you love them more than me?!

MC: *sigh* No Asmo, they're just a friend who liked to screw with the paparazzi. And the paparazzi was over eager with us cause a lot of people loved shipping us.

Asmo: And why were you shipped with them?! I'm clearly a better match!

MC: *scratches head* Ah probably I used to pull too many pranks with them on stage and we were given a lot of duets and dances together.

Asmo: Stage? Duets? Dances? MC ...were you an IDOL?!

MC: ....yes?

Asmo: *squealing* WAIT TILL I MAKE YOU BECOME AN IDOL HERE TOO ALONG WITH ME SO PEOPLE WILL SHIP US INSTEAD!

Beelzebub

Beel: MC I heard from the others that you used to be a famous idol.

MC: Ah they told you too? Atleast your reaction is much calmer.

Beel: I heard famous people get lots of gifts from fans! Including snacks and candy!

MC: Haha we did. Only we weren't allowed to eat them.

Beel: ...but it's your gift. Of course you're allowed to eat them?!

MC: *sigh* Being in a idol group meant having to maintain your looks at all times. And weight was a big issue. I remember during tours we only had to live off apples, cucumbers and pea soup for a week.

Beel: That doesn't sound nice at all. *sad Beel noises* Here MC. *gives you half his sandwich* You can eat as much as you like here!

MC: Thank you so much, Beel.

Belphegor

Belphie: Did you get enough sleep being an idol and all? Beel told me you used to be one.

MC: Between late night practices and early morning workouts? I managed on three hours of sleep.

Belphie: That's less than half the ideal amount for humans.

MC: Ah well all of us needed to be perfect with the performance or we'd be screamed at or worse suspended.

Belphie: Performance for people who only need to see your face to start screaming. So much wasted energy. It's good that you left. Adoration from a bunch of strangers isn't worth losing sleep.

MC: I know right? It is nice to have a lot of people love you maybe but if I can't even be awake enough to appreciate them... what's the point?

Belphie: Come here. *wraps you up in his blanket* I help you catch up on the years of sleep you've missed.

MC; Thanks, Belphie.

#obey me headcannons #obey me Lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me beel #obey me satan #obey me asmo #obey me belphie #obey me fluff #obey me levi #obey me imagine #obey me game #obey me x mc #obey me mc is an idol #obey me idol mc #obey me gn! mc

[yoshkeii]

"𝚂𝚎𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚎."

࿐ character(s): Daishou Suguru, Atsumu Miya, Sakusa Kiyoomi

࿐ genre: angst (to fluff)

࿐ type: headcanons (hcs)

࿐ requested: yes, as a continuation of  "𝚄𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚙𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚍.”

⌦ male!reader (he/him)

⌦ mentions ; cheating (atsumu’s), angst to fluff (sakusa)

⌦ they all have different scenarios, so its best to check out the first post for a little more context.

A/N: never expected to make a part two, but i guess the feedback said otherwise. its been awhile since ive written anything, so i may be rusty, disregard mistakes too please-

𝙽𝙾𝚃𝙴 ; this is queued. i am still on my hiatus.

𝙳𝚊𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚞:

→ ever since the argument, you had left. taking majority of what was yours and what you could in the quickest of matters. you and Daishou barely talked or interact within those days. often dead silence within the shared home... or rather what was shared.

→ it was quite suffocating as well, leaving each other after a long relationship you both committed to. but you had a gut feeling it would end unfortunately.

→ Daishou had seen you leave for the last time past the front door. only exchanging a blunt “bye.” before disappearing behind the solid door. he really hoped this was all lies and games, but it wasn’t. he knew this was real, he knew this will be his reality. without you. the fading steps signaled that you were not gonna look back.

→ since then, he hasn’t heard of you since. he hasn’t seen your name around social media and only the bittersweet memories of when his friends would bring you up came into mind.

→ but it was like, you erased him from your world. and yet Daishou still held tight of the cut thread that lead to you. the other end laying flat onto the floor as the other end you had, disappeared as a whole. a huge gap between you both.

→ him being in denial, he kept mainly to himself. 

→ the old shared space felt empty. drastically different every time he would come home. he would hear your welcoming voice that made his whole body so warm and fuzzy, but now, the silence was painful and cold as he stepped inside his so called ‘home’. he didn’t know why...

→ but he really wanted you back. he wanted to see your face no matter when he came home. he missed your whole presence. he yearned for something that he could’ve kept if he would just shut up.

→ Daishou didn’t expect to see you here. at the same party he would be invited to, he watched you from the second floor that had the view of the merged rooms of the living room and kitchen. seeing you laugh and smile with two other friends who you stumbled upon, the sight made his heart sting.

→ a sharp stab straight through his chest, only thinking if he could be the reason for that smile. that laughter. oh he envied it.

→ he tried to avert his thoughts away before he heard some whistles and calling of names, to see your figure slip away with someone else from the crowd.

→ watching you both from his higher position, he noticed your hands intertwined with the other. his own hand slightly clenching the daring drink he held, the other grasping the rail tighter the longer he watched.

→ Daishou’s eyes soon looked up at your face. the expression you had made him feel conflicted.

→ the wide pure smile you had accompanied with the deep flush, made him feel that oh so familiar feeling. but knowing he wasn’t the cause of it pained him.

→ although, seeing you with someone deserving made him feel at ease. but the stabbing dagger in his heart laid there still, only reminding him that he could’ve been that better person.

𝙰𝚝𝚜𝚞𝚖𝚞:

→ after the confrontation, you and Atsumu had split ways of course. it was difficult to move on and realize the situation at hand, to the both of you.

→ seeing where your stuff would be gone in the shared space made it surprisingly empty and less... alive. the whole place felt dead and empty, like a home left abruptly without an obvious reason of why.

→ but Atsumu knew why, and it began to nag at him. it made him feel so guilty to do that to you. to him, you were so pure, kind, and oh so nice. he could go on about your looks too, he really could. but every thought of you made his mind so hazy and clouded with distraught. 

→ why did he cheat? you were loyal to him- if only he could be too.

→ its been a couple years since then, it was tough for Atsumu. he had cut ties for who he was cheating with, regretting what he did and in hopes to regain you back before- didn’t obviously work. so now he stayed alone in the home that practically mocked him of his decision. 

→ he was quite surprised Atsumu wasn’t blocked by you throughout social media etc. but he didn’t dare to strike a conversation and laid idle as he saw you occasionally appear on his feed. 

→ seeing you mention being in relationship but only giving vague hints and images, truly never revealing who to your followers. 

→ sighing as he slipped his phone into his pocket, he didn’t want to think about it all, so he decided to pay a visit to Osamu at his restaurant. to his twin’s dismay.

→ arriving there fairly quickly he waved at his brother who was behind the counter cleaning up for the night, seeing his twin wave back slightly before continuing on whatever he was doing.

→ Atsumu couldn’t help but noticed the metallic object that wrapped around Osamu’s ring finger. 

→ “..’Samu? What’s on yer’ hand?”

→ “Oh- ya noticed already. I got engaged not so long ago, or recently.”

→ curiosity jabbing at the blonde made him eagerly question again.

→ “I- What?? By who!? ‘Samu ya didn’t even tell me you were in a relationship!” Atsumu could only just whine, knowing his brother didn’t share with him about his personal life after highschool. 

→ “Shut up ‘Tsumu.. Don’t be so loud in my restaurant or I’ll kick yer ass out of here!”

→ “..but do you still wanna know?”

→ Osamu seeing his twin nod with anticipation made him sigh, knowing this wouldn’t end too well. “Well.. me and [Name] are getting married. Just got engaged with him two days ago.”

→ “..[Name]..?” Atsumu could only repeat the familiar name, his voice faint but still audible to his brother’s ears.

→ he couldn’t believe it. his brother... and.. 

→ “W-well-! That’s.. nice for both of ya, haha..” the blonde tried to played off, hoping that the wavering of his voice didn’t catch his attention but, Osamu already knew, simply playing along as the conversation continued and slowly shifted off to something else.

→ Atsumu had left the place rather quickly than he originally intended to stay- but he didn’t expect it. he didn’t expect you being engaged with his twin, eventually knowing you’ll see each other soon.

→ he didn’t know how to feel about this. he was happy for both of you- but- he wasn’t over you. although it has been more than two years, he wasn’t. he missed you, he yearned to see you again. he wanted to hear your laughter and giggles, your voice overall. he wanted to see you smile, he wanted to see your handsome face. 

→  he wanted... you back. but he knows he can’t have you. not anymore.

𝚂𝚊𝚔𝚞𝚜𝚊:

→ when you left passed the front door, you hadn’t come back after a few minutes. and it was.. raining. pretty badly.

→ having worry built up in his stomach that soon turned into a mixture of anxiety made him feel uneasy, overthinking the situation and words he said to you earlier made him choke on his actions. 

→ snapping out of the trance, he rushed to go grab a coat to slip on. retrieving his phone. hurrying out the front door hoping to find you haven’t gotten too far already, almost slipping down some steps of the apartment building on the way to find you.

→ the rushing anxiety continue to flow through him, making his movements more loose and clumsy as he ran off to find you. calling out your name aimlessly of the darkened rainy streets. not caring that his curls were getting soaked in the pounding rain, he just wanted to find you. 

→ to find you and keep you safe.

→ Sakusa’s heart kept increasing every moment he didn’t see you. he wanted to find you so bad- this anxiety he had was much worse than when around he was in crowds, this one felt more instinctual.

→ forgetting he had brought his phone, he slipped it out of his pocket quickly dialing and calling you. to find you answering on the second ring.

→ “..h-hello-?”

→ “[Name]..! T-thank god your safe.”

→ the slight mess-up Sakusa slurred with his words made you feel slightly worried, “..yes I am safe. what’s up with you??”

→ “Nothing..! But w-where are you?”

→ “I’m.. at a nearby cafe. Are you sure you-”

→ your boyfriend interrupted you quickly, “I’m on my way.”

→ “H-hey..! Don’t just-”, hearing the call end with singular beep, “aaaand.. he hung up..” you decided to look around from your position outside, grasping your phone nervously. realizing the rain was pounding down much harder than earlier.

→ the sound of the familiar voice calling your name from the distance caught your attention, gazing over to see Sakusa running over towards you. 

→ “S-saku-”

→ jumping lightly at the sudden hug he enveloped you, muttering soft rushed apologies over and over again as he hid his drenched face in the crook of your neck. he had continued his rambles of apologies as you hugged him back, rubbing his back lightly. watching the ravened hair male let it out a little longer before you could mutter reassuring words to him back.

→ the tension slowly rising from his muscles but the hold of his hug didn’t falter at all, only continuing to snake around your waist.

→ “..you scared me..” “...im really sorry, babe.”

→ you lifted your gaze to meet Sakusa’s, lifting your hands up to cup his face. brushing a few strands of hair away from his view sending a quick peck onto his lips. “you don’t need to apologize anymore Omi. you did enough already..”

→ “A-and you’re drenched! Baby, you’re gonna get sick-” you blinked, noticing how flat his hair was from the rain that couldn’t reach you both from the small roof over the entrance of the cafe. 

→ “..i-i’ll be fine..” the soft stutter Sakusa made noted he was embarrassed about the thought, “..i’m glad your the one not gonna be sick though.” he muttered before softly pecking your lips.

→ “Honey..” you sighed, taking your hands in his before heading inside the building. “..lets just get something to drink to warm us up, ‘kay? then we can head back.”

→ “I-m.. paying aren’t I-..”

→ “Yes. Yes you are. A treat after a bad tiring day!”

→ “..you just want sweets-”

→ “Shut it Kiyoomi.”

#rainy-days;- 🌁 #at-dusk;- 🌆 #folder 📁;- 𝙷𝚊𝚒𝚔𝚢𝚞𝚞 #daishou x male reader #atsumu x male reader #sakusa x male reader #atsumu miya x male reader #sakusa kiyoomi x male reader #haikyuu x male reader #hq x male reader #x male reader #daishou suguru x reader #daishou x reader #atsumu miya x reader #atsumu x reader #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #sakusa x reader #x reader #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #daishou angst #atsumu angst #sakusa fluff #fluff to angst #haikyuu angst

[chloe-online]

karl comforts you after a nightmare.

i know its late but my writing got pushed back (i was gonna start this 3 1/2 hours ago) because i had to help out some family, its now 3 in the morning so if this is bad, im sorry! anyways so, im almost positive this has been done before but i'll try my best to make it unique? this was originally going to be headcanons but im turning into a short story bc im extra :). im sorry if its similar to another one. again i'll do my best to make the reader gender neutral. enjoy!

you felt the color of your face drain. he was gone. you immediately run to his side, and drop to your knees. he had to have been the palest shade of white there even was, and he felt heavy as you held his lifeless body close to you, weeping. you couldnt believe it, the man you loved was gone, bleeding out onto the factory floor. who would murder him, in the comfort of his own home? who could be so cruel. so horrible whoever did this was NOT getting away with it.

"Karl! Please dont do this to me i love-"

"do what? Kitten please wake up!" a familiar voice cried out. your eyes bolted open to feeling of being shaken awake. your eyes met his, that instant you were already clung to him like a koala, tears rolling down your cheeks. he stayed sitting up, both arms around you, rubbing your back. you could tell by his slight shaking he was worried about you, but you genuinely thought you lost him.

"karl, I-I," you hesitated, you realised how ridiculous you would sound.

"what love? spit it out, whats wrong," he purred. you settled your chin into the cranny of his neck, the gentle rubbing of his calloused hands on your back calming you. your eyes stung as the dream came back to you.

"i thought i lost you, for good," you whimpered. he gripped you tighter, he'd never seen you this worked up over a nightmare. you rarely got this anxious. his breath travelled down your neck, and into the entrance on your (it was his) shirt.

"darling, im not going anywhere, i wouldnt dream of it" he reassured you. he placed sloppy kisses onto your neck. you pulled away to look into his gorgeous eyes.

"promise?" you murmured, wiping tears from your eyes. karl kissed you on the forehead.

"i promise, now lets get you back to bed" he hummed. you smirked at him and cozied yourself into the blankets, tugging karls shirt so he comes down there too.

you nuzzled yourself into his chest, listening to his heartbeat, the familiar smell of whatever karls covered in, this was one of your favorite things to do with your lover. karl wrapped his one arm around your waist.

"you made yourself comfortable," he teased. you ignore his snarky remarks. his chest lifted up before it fell down again. he admired you. loved everything about you.

eventually you fell asleep. karl held you for as long as he can remember, he ended up passing out as well. he loved you, adored you. he finally found his person. the one who could actually put up with him. someone who loved him, you werent scared of him, you didnt think he was a monster. he'd do anything for you, as long as your safe.

hi! just a few things i wanted to say. sorry this took me two hours to write, ive been distracted haha. i stepped a little out of my comfort zone by writing a little story but im quite proud of it! my writing isnt very strong and i still feel i did a good job on this piece. i hope you enjoyed, have a great rest of your day!

#karl heisenberg x reader #karl heisenberg #re8 heisenberg #re8

[artreider]

Let's try to get this final live blog on my station 19 rewatch done. I'm currently laid up on my couch in mild pain but unable to do anything else.

I don't really like flashback episodes but i want one for the premiere since we are jumping so far ahead. I hate that this episode starts with a fight. But damn knowing what the fight is over, i love how loyal andy is to maya in this episode. Something ive wanted for her and the team. Qnd also jaina looks gorgeous.

The fire scene yay another fire on the fire show lmao. Feel like we missed some last year which im sure was covid related.

The marina scene ugh chefs kiss. I love how happy and giddy they are. I do wish we couldve gotten to see some of their month apart communication and their quarantining apart those two weeks when carina got back. I wrote a little something related to that and i may share before the premiere of season 5.

The quiet moment between carina saying her morning was better than those 6 weeks and then asking about mayas folks was a beautiful and real moment and i love it. So brief it could be overlooked but great choice for team.

The little bit of danielle and stefania that was them and adlibbed in this episode was so great also.

I love that rhey addressed how everyone was able to attend maskless and how safe the wedding was keeping the real world element in. Also vic love you and your chicken dance comment makes me sad that we didnt get it.

Vics parents trying to talk to her about theo is so cute.

Poor lawyer she'd be good for dean.

I understand some people dont come out until late in life but that is hard to hear that you havent loved the person youve been with for decades like you do this new person. That would hurt me so much to hear, like i couldve been with someone who is my great love if youd told me sooner. I love/hate this storyline for travis family.

Ugh if this fire had gone on any longer those poor kids and elderly couple.

Haha andy you should wait until someone answers the door for you when visiting almost newlyweds or people who've been seperated for 6 weeks lmao.

Also maya's excuse and none wet (shower) sex hair i love it.

Ugh sullivan trying to defend himself makes me so upset.

Bailey giving ben hell about second and third opinions is funny, like i figure shed be all for it.

Inara and marcus leaving jack is sad. I hope we still get to see marsha in season 5. Also if they do pair jack and jo itd be a bit ironic. I mean jo too had an abusive ex like inara.

Also jack and his marsha have similar eyes, itd be something if it came out she really was his mom.

I dont understand how maya hadnt settled on what to wear she's queen of the clipboard lmao. Just goes to show how some things throw us off course. Also i totally get her saying her outfit choice will define her forever. I judge my look in my wedding photos all the time and feel like other people do as well.

Why do i feel like this exchange between maya and carina was mostly adlibbed? It just feels so fun.

This poor family and ugh i couldnt imagine having to make the tough calls of firefighters/fire captains.

Love that all the fire crew helped put the wedding on.

I understand travis emotion here.

How'd this conversation about maya's folks get started with andy???

I love that maya and andy's friendship is restored. Also famous last words maya, dont speak the bad juju into existence.

Dean you shouldve spoken up there.

Why the chief there? I live in a city and the chief aint showing up for a house call that needs a few units. At least not until fire is out of they for some reason cant get it out.

Lmao maya freaking out about wearing the same thing as carina. Andy therapizing maya is funny.

That poor boy.

The dad comments to ben are beautiful. Also love that so many of the team know how dean feels about vic.

So why is travis getting dressed separately than the rest of his team. I mean i know its because he doesnt know about Dean's feelings and pushes vic to give theo a chance as well as allow theo and travis to talk but come on. He wouldnt get ready separately.

Also what was the point of theo going to that room if not to get ready. Sorry just annoying.

I wish carina had had someone mention andrew to her. Whether ben, bailey, maya or even any of the fire team who worked on the call with him during the crossover awhile back. Her grief during this day of happiness should've been acknowledged, even with just a remembrance table for him amd other family she lost to covid.

I do love this beautiful moment with vic though saying this isnt all just for maya.

Oh my how i love the maya confronting her father. She is the brave i want to be. Also what she says to her mom, yes chefs kiss. However when her mom shows up at the wedding, really the woman couldnt grab a nice shirt or dress to wear on her way out or on her way to the wedding.

I also love the look of pride on maya's moms face both at the house and the wedding.

Im sad we probably wont get any moments of her living with marina due to the time jump.

Ugh the choice that cost maya her promotion but ahouldnt have.

Also with all maya's options for clothes, couldnt they had dressed her mama in something borrowed from maya. Lol im sorry it bothers me so.

Vic's song for the intro is beautiful. Barrett has a beautiful voice.

Maya is so happy her mom is there and i love it. Also in my head at least one person videoing is doing it for the greys family who couldnt make it to the wedding for carina.

I also love maya singing along with vic to carina.

Queen of the clipboard forgetting to write her vows is special and funny. I love carina talking her down from a panic attack. Also her simple vow is beautiful and how carina who probably did write her vows saying we're good instead of reading them after seeing maya's mom in attendance and the look shared is everything.

I truly believe that was the moment she 100% knew maya had changed from end of season 3, was definitely all the way in. She knew what it meant for maya's mom to be there.

Love the dance montage and improved marina kiss.

Another healing theo and travis talk.

Sullivan just cant let it go and ugh trying to justify it. I just cant, still not over it. Even if he isnt captain in season 5 it still isnt right.

Sullivan you cant say you have the teams back then saying you can control them and throwing maya under the bus. Those are contradictory.

This jack and andy conversation is interesting.

This marina conversation is funny but sad when you know the end of the episode.

Its so funny that so few people know about Miller's feelings at this point.

It'll be interesting to see the travis, vic and theo in season 5.

Ben and bailey are so cute.

Wish we couldve had conversations at the wedding with maya and her mom or carina and maya's mom or the 3 of them.

Inara is so wise. I hate this for all 4 of them.

Gotta love the ole grab em and pull em back to kiss them and let them know how you really feel tremmett moment.

Too late dean, they tried to tell you.

I love marina dancing in the background ugh sullivan and the surrera rehashing.

Time for the horrible news ugh.

Everyone just looking at marina and knowing is horrible.

Great season, great episode and im looking forward to whats next.

Thank you to everyone thats been following my rewatch blogging, and for all the kind comments. I appreciate it so much, made the summer so fun.

#station 19 #marina #maya bishop #carina deluca #maya and carina #maya x carina #andy herrera #robert sullivan #dean miller #ben warren #jack gibson #inara #victoria hughes #travis montgomery #maya and carina station 19 #carina x maya #miranda bailey #theo ruiz #emmett dixon

[urbfsecretgf]

The Last Few Days.

context: you and vinnie have been best friends since the time you moved into town. literally inseperable. you guys do everything together.

_____________________________________________________________

*BZZ*

*BZZ*

*BZZ*

"bro whos texting me at;" you look at your alarm clock to see it hasnt even gone off yet.

"ugh its literally 5am" you groan

turning on your phone to look at who texted you, you are blinded by the brightness of your phone screen

"Jesus"

you look at your messages

*15 New Messages from: Asshat*

*5 Missed Calls from: Asshat*

*3 New Voicemails from: Asshat*

looking annoyed you respond to Vinnie with:

"vinnie i swear if you arent dying im literally going to kill you, its 5am what do you want?"

you really hope its something important because you are absolutely exhausted

*From Asshat: meet me at Freddy's in 15 ;)*

you roll your eyes at your phone and sleepily get out of bed and start getting ready to meet Vinnie at a local burger joint

Vinnie has been your best friend since you moved here. he was the first person you met and the first person you clicked with.

you've always had a feeling hes had a small crush on you but you've always had a small crush on him as well, so maybe it was just you hoping he did.

walking out the door you remember you forgot to put your favorite perfume on, which was his favorite too.

you head to Freddy's and see his mazda rx7 sitting in the empty parking lot.

"BOO!"

Vinnie jumps out from the bushes scaring the life out of you

"holy shit Vinnie, dont do that oh my gosh. damn near smacked you"

laughing he says "should have seen your face, shit was hilarious"

you and vinnie do the handshake you guys created on the first day of meeting eachother. no one else knows it besides you two. its your guys' little secret.

"so why was my beauty sleep interrupted?"

"im sorry, you really do need your beauty sleep"

you hit his arm "thanks asshole"

"im kidding gosh, anyways i wanted you to come with me and see something."

"oh yeah? what?" Vinnie always likes to suprise you with things, sometimes they are good, other times they aren't.

"this time its going to be good i promise."

you and Vinnie walk to his car and head to where ever hes taking you to.

it takes you a second but you figure out where you guys are going.

the skate park.

"why are we going to the skate park vin?"

"shhhh you'll ruin the surprise" he says acting like it'll spoil something for you

you look at the clock and see that its almost 6 meaning the sun is going to rise soon.

"is he taking me to watch the sunset?" you think to yourself "i think he is, awww how cute. no. ew. gross. cringe. but it really is cute"

you dont know how to feel about it.

"we are here" he says parking the car on the top of the hill

the two of you get out of the car

you look over and see this beautiful view

"holy shit vinnie, this is gorgeous."

"i told you it was going to be a good surprise"

you are honestly speechless. its one of the prettiest sunrises you have ever seen.

"hey come sit by me" vinnie says while sitting on the edge of the cliff

you go over and sit by him, taking your sandals off not wanting them to fall off.

"can i tell you something y/n?"

"are you going to tell me that you are pulling a big prank on me and then when i go home my room is going to be covered in sticky notes or something?"

he laughs and says "no its something ive wanted to tell you for a while"

waiting for him to tell you, you say "...go on then" and gesture at him to tell you impatiently

"so you know how we've known each other for a couple years now?"

"mhm?"

"and you know how we are like best friends right?"

you sigh "just get to the point vinnie"

"never mind ill just tell you later"

"no wtf just tell me i wont judge or anything"

he hesitates for a second and then looks back at you

"fine, y/n i like you."

you starting laughing thinking he isnt being serious. why would he like you?

"HA nice one thats funny"

"what? oh yeah haha it was a joke me liking you? ew no"

the two of you walk back to his car and you try to sneak a picture of him because he looks really good today.

you look back at the picture and realize he looked directly at the camera.

"fuck" you say under your breath

"what"

"nothing"

you decide to delete the picture and grab the aux cord

"what are you putting on?"

"i dont know ill just shuffle my liked songs"

Love on Top By Beyonce starts playing

"this is gonna be fun"

he turns up the song and starts bopping along

you start yelling the lyrics "BABY ITS YOUUUUUU YOU'RE THE ONE I LOVE YOU'RE THE ONE I NEEEEEEEED"

vinnie bursts out laughing and joins you "YOURE THE ONLY ONE I SEEEEEEE COME ON BABY ITS YOUUUUUU"

"OOOOOO GET IT!!"

you both sing along to songs all the way back to your house. screaming the lyrics as loud as you can, and doing those awkward dances.

"y/n" vinnie says before he drives away

"yes?"

"imma tell you a secret"

"go for it"

he waves his hand telling you to come to his window

you roll your eyes and walk to him

leaning into the window he grabs your face and kisses you

he drives off and yells "see you later y/n!!!"

you stand there not knowing what to do

"he kissed me." you say surprised. "OMG HE KISSED ME! WHAT THE HELL?"

*BZZ*

your phone goes off and you see its a text from vinnie

*New Message from Asshat: you know you liked that ;) anyways im going into the town to hang out at the skate park after dinner with austin, KJ, and rem, you should grab your board and hang out with us for a little if you're not busy then*

you text him back saying you'll be there.

heading back inside your mom asks where you were sounding worried.

"oh im sorry vinnie took me out to see the sunrise"

"y/n. youre supposed to tell me where you are going and when you are going" your mom says with a dissapointed tone in her voice.

"i know mom im sorry."

you walk into the kitchen to make yourself lunch and ask if you can go to the skate park after dinner.

"yeah thats fine, thank you for asking this time."

"Y/N!!!!" your little sister yells

"what livy" you say annoyed. she does this a million times a day

"im bored"

"then go outside or something"

"i dont want tooooooooo"

"well i dont know then figure it out on your own"

"UGH" she says as she stomps off

finishing your lunch you decide to go upstairs and take a nap not only because you are tired but because you want to see vinnie again

"y/n!" your mom yells from downstairs, "dinners going to be ready in about an hour"

with dinner being in an hour you take a shower and start to slowly get ready to go to the skate park. you decide to dress nice knowing youre going to see vinnie AND his friends.

you hurry up and finish dinner as soon as your mom says its ready

you kiss your mom on the cheek, grab a hawiian roll, and your skateboard and head to the skate park.

on your way there you text vinnie to let him know youre coming

*New Message from Asshat: bet me and the boys are already here see you when you get here :)*

just looking at the smiley face he added at the end of his text made you smile

when you get to the skate park the first person you see is vinnie

as he skates past you he hold out his hand to do your guys' handshake. you do it every time you see each other. he smiles.

"hey y/n! hey guys this is y/n"

vinnie introduces you to his friends and they all surround you.

"hi guys! ive heard wonderful things about you guys"

"you care if i put on some music?" one of vins friends ask you

"no no no we need music please"

after skating for a few hours you start to get tired and decided to head back home

"no y/n stay a little bit longer" vinnie pleads

"vin i cant im tired and i need to go home"

"bye y/n! it was nice meeting you!" his friends say to you

"it was nice meeting you guys too! goodnight vinnie ill see you tomorrow"

"goodnight y/n text me when you get home okay?"

"haha i will dont worry. byeeeeeeee"

as soon as you arrive home you text vinnie like you said you would

*To Asshat: i made it home safe dw dw. im going to bed now, text me when you get home. goodnight asshat :)*

*BZZ*

*New Message from Asshat: i'll text you when i get home too, goodnight loser sleep well ;)*

you set your phone down and drift off to sleep.

*The Next Morning*

after waking up to your alarm you look at your phone

*Zero New Messages*

seeing vinnie didnt text you, you decide to text him instead.

*To Asshat: good morning vin, you never texted me so i wanted to make sure you got home safe. text me when you wake up :)*

you go about your day as any other day, but you find yourself checking you phone to see if vinnie texted. he never did.

this isnt like him to not text you all day especially if you guys hung out the night before. a bunch of scenarios start flooding you head on what could have happened.

"maybe he lost his phone, or he broke it. maybe he didnt get home until super late and is still asleep."

all of these ideas are dumb.

worried about vinnie, you call his phone.

it goes straight to voicemail.

"Hey! its vinnie and y/n is here too, sorry i didnt answer im probably doing other things like playing outside or playing video games. ill call you back later!"

its the voicemail you two made when he got his first phone. you guys sounded so little.

instead of leaving a voicemail for him you call his mom.

"Hello?"

"Hi Mrs Hacker its y/n"

"oh hi y/n i was about to call you actually."

"is everything okay? like is vinnie okay?"

she pauses.

"Mrs hacker?"

you hear her start crying. it sucks when adults cry.

"Mrs Hacker is everything okay?"

"oh honey, Vinnie is in the hospital."

"what happened? is he okay?"

"no hes not."

you call vinnie again, with tears streaming down your face you leave a voicemail.

your voice is shaky.

"Vinnie please answer the phone."

you call again

"VInnie im serious. if youre playing some kind of joke on me its not funny"

and again

"Answer the phone Vin. stop messing around. you have me worried."

and again

"Dont do this shit. stop. answer the fking phone vin."

leaving message after message, blowing up his phone, you decide to go to your mom and tell her what happened.

she already knew before you.

"ARE YOU SERIOUS?? YOU KNEW? AND DIDNT TELL ME?"

"y/n i didnt want you to worry"

"OF COURSE IM GOING TO FKING WORRY ABOUT HIM"

you never curss at your mom and you feel bad whenever you do. this time it was different. she knew he wasnt okay but she didnt tell you. that made you mad.

"y/n calm down please"

"im going over there."

you start walking to the door but your mom stops you

"no im going over there right now mom. MOM HES HURT HES NOT OKAY I NEED TO BE WITH HIM"

livy, your little sister, walks downstairs after hearing all the yelling. it was past her bedtime.

"why is everyone yelling?"

she sees you crying with your car keys in your hand

"y/n where are you going?"

"im going to vinnies house."

"nowhere. she isnt going anywhere liv go back to bed"

"im going either way."

you storm out of the house and get into the car.

you drive to vinnies house to see his parents there with the cops.

"y/n! omg im so glad youre here" Mrs Hacker says as she hugs you.

"what happened is he okay?"

"we dont know, all we know is that hes in the hospital. we are about to leave please, come with. he would want you to be there with him."

you agree and go with to the hospital.

when you get there doctors directed you guys to where he was staying. you see tubes of all kinds going in and out of him. it looks like something you would see in a show.

"is he going to be okay?"

you overhear the conversation his parents are having with the doctors while sitting at the edge of his bed.

all of a sudden you hear his mom burst into tears. hes not going to make it.

you let his parents talk to vinnie and say everything they need to. after they finish they gesture to you telling you its your turn.

"y/n. youre here." he says. his voice is all raspy and gone but it cracks when he says here. you can tell hes glad to see you.

"of course im here. what happened v?"

"i dont know, i was driving home and all of a sudden i see a flash of light coming towards me. i blacked out and ended up here. i think i crashed or something. im going to be okay though."

after he says that, tears start flowing from your eyes because you know he isnt going to be okay.

"y/n dont cry its okay. pretty girls dont deserve to cry. ill be okay i promise"

"vinnie i love you. i always have and i always will. youre my best friend and i dont know what id do without you."

"y/n dont think about that. im not going anywhere" he doesnt know how bad of a condition hes actually in. he doesnt have much longer.

"i know you arent" you lie "i love you. just please know that. i always have. when you said you liked to today i thought you were joking because why would you like me, but then you kissed me and i realized you werent joking."

"y/n why would i joke about that?" he asks sounding confused

the doctor tells you he only has a couple minutes left. you look at his parents and they tell you its okay to keep talking to him. they want you to be the last one he sees before hes gone.

"because i like you too vinnie and i just didnt know why you would ever like me, so i didnt believe you."

"y/n ive liked you since we first met. i wanted to spend the rest of my life with you and only you."

hearing him say that made you choke up. the tears start forming in your eyes again.

"you will vinnie. you will i promise. im not leaving you."

he smiles at you and you smile back.

you lean over and put your hand on his cheek.

"i love you y/n"

"i love you too vinnie. i always will."

he takes his final breath.

and just like that, hes gone.

as soon as you get home you start looking at all of the old pictures and old videos you have of him. from his birthday to being on vacation with him, to old pics from ft, or just dumb pictures. anything you can find.

you grew up with him. he was your best friend, the person you loved the most, the shoulder you needed to cry on, his shoulder for him to cry on. he was your everything, and you were his.

dont be sad that he gone. enjoy the memories you have with him.

#vinnie hacker x y/n #vinnie x reader #vinnie hacker #vinnie hacker x reader #vinnie hacker x you #vinnie hacker imagine

[loverofallthingssmart]

tagged by @dorky-little-hooman thanks luna !! ily and im sorry this took so long sdfgh <33

Playlist Tag Game:

rules: we’re snooping in your playlist. put your entire music library on shuffle and list the first ten songs (including music-only stuff like OSTs as well as songs) and then choose 10 victims.

oh boy here we go....

1) tennis court - lorde

2) rich - megan thee stallion

3) before he cheats - carrie underwood

4) in the morning - itzy

5) primadonna - marina

6) akasaka sad - rina sawayama

7) nobody - mitski

8) hypnotize-instrumental - the notorious b.i.g

9) busy boy - chloe x halle

10) other side of hollywood - julie and the phantoms soundtrack

Get To Know Me

Why did you choose your url?

past me was a pretentious snob and was like oh haha youre an intellectual and you only engage with intellectual content so lover of all things smart is PERFECT and now i have too many links in my pinned to go back and fix if i change it so </3

Any side-blogs? If you have them, name them and why you have them.

yeah !! i have a sideblog for cql/mdzs @wenqingsgirlfriend thats active bc i didnt want to bother anyone with my cql posting <3 i still kind of post cql on main sometimes though

How long have you been on tumblr?

apparently since 2018 according to memories??? but ive only used it since june 2020

Do you have a queue tag?

yeah !! its "its queue and me forever" although ive stopped tagging my queue lmao

Why did you start your blog in the first place?

i would search up " ____ tumblr posts" on google on my phone with random topics to pass time and after my friends talked about being gay with each other my (at the time, straight) self wanted to see if i would get 'gay tumblr' or 'straight tumblr' which to this day i have no clue what that means

Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

got tired of the picrew icon and wanted something pink to go along with my what? 3rd pink theme so i scrolled through my pink tag and found the cat in front of the flowers and thought " this is PERFECT omg like" and so i changed it and i was right it WAS perfect <3

Why did you choose your header?

pretty pink flowers to match my whole pink theme (pretty much same story as the icon)

What’s your post with the most notes?

ugh this one which i cringe every time i see it in my activity its just. cringe like idk the fact thats its unided, lok, and was almost uncredited.... no thank you

How many people do you follow?

uhh 105 rn and idk if im gonna cleanse it or follow new people at the moment but that number might change

Have you ever made a shitpost?

yes???? no??? what qualifies as a shitpost?? im sure i have, it just didnt blown up so i forgot it or something

How often do you use tumblr?

all the time bestie im here all the time its an illness (less time now though since my electronics are gone for the most part DFGKJH)

Did you have a fight/argument with a blog once? who won?

hmm. i dont think so? im normally a stew in silence and maybe rant to a few people kind of person when i get mad/annoyed at a blog but i dont think ive gotten into a fight publicly ghjksfh... i should change that <3

How do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this post’?

theyre just so UGH. i almost ALWAYS scroll down bc i feel burdened by it and if i rb it then others will too and i just sideeye the people who put those kinds of posts on my dash (i unfollow if theyre not a mutual actually)

Do you like tag games?

YEA !! although sometimes i dont do them bc one i forget or two im feeling lazy fghj although feel free to keep tagging me i love them <3

Do you like ask games?

yeah !!!! i dont get that many asks but i LOVE ask games omg

Do you have a crush on a mutual?

nope !! (i mean.. if anyone is volunteering..... 👀 DFGTHYUIKJ)

Phone Photo Meme Game

rules: choose one picture from ur camera roll without downloading to sum up your personality and then tag 5 ppl

[id: a screencap of a-yuan from the show, "the untamed". he stares offscreen with a distressed and disappointed expression, his arm raised as if he was going to show something. /end id]

im upbeat and cool and positive and then you get to know me </3

no pressure tags! uh @silver-snow @n1ghtangel@panini-the-bird-killer@doingwonderfully and @cxntofgnc <3

#please make your own post and dont rb with your edition my notifs were screwed after the last one fghj #anyway #DFGH the caption is slighly self depreceating but dw i think im lowkey kind of swell to be around :] #at least i hope so #my post #tag game

[shinymooncolor]

Sweater weather chat #9

A little Friday tribute to @lumosinlove ‘s sweater weather. 

@siriuslyqueer and @wxlfstxrx thanks for helping me through a groundbreaking epiphany. <3 

Sweater weather chat #9

Celeste has plans. Logan mopes. And drives a minivan. Kuny hides in a library. Nado is a star. And the wives call him Jackie. We get some lady love. Cause hockey wives are awesome. The team dads get in trouble. What did happen in Prague? Does mild vodka exist? 

--- 

Thursday 3.42 pm 

Celeste: hi ladies! So, as you know the long dreaded school talent show is looming on the horizon. I don’t know with you -  but that’s a Saturday we will not get back…. Any ideas?? 

Anya: we send our husbands to the show. 😜 zhenya is helping my kids anyways. Not sure how that happened. But him and Jackie came to leech a free dinner and somehow ended up joining the talent show. 

Linnea: that sounds like something that needs to be recorded! I’m up for a spa weekend. God knows I need it. We’re headed for Sweden next month and I need to prepare mentally for my in-laws. 🙊

Celeste: so we agree to send the boys to the show? And get on with a lovely spa weekend ourselves 😍

Allison: I’m in. I love my boys but I’ve seen them dance and heard them sing. Brady has been successfully avoiding the past three events!!! But I’m intrigued about what the hell Kuny and Jackie can help with? 😂 

Anya: I don’t know and I don’t care. It’s sergei problem now. I’ve warned them to keep it kid friendly. Jackie is still a little scared of me, I think. 👻

Celeste: they are good boys but those two. I swear they’re worse than our lot. And that’s saying something. You remember Prague? 😠

Linnea: the one with the flags at worlds? What were they thinking.... 

Allison: oh sounds like there’s a story there! What did they get up to? 🙊

Linnea: let’s get back to that after three bottles of Chardonnay... 

——

Thursday 4.08 pm 

Celeste: you are going to the talent show. And take Logan with you. He’s been moping for a week. He’s such a teenager. 😂 and DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT DRINKING AGAIN. I will tell Logan about Prague. 😠

Dumo: but I have to train. And don’t tell anyone it’ll undermine our authority. 

Celeste: no you don’t have to, it’s optional. Don’t even start Pascal. You’re taking your ragtag team Dads and you’re all going to sit through 3 hours of recorders and botched Disney music. And you’re going to applaud your babies. And please film whatever the terrible two get up to. I’ve seen the outfits. 😂😍😂😍

Dumo: I love you but you’re mean. Enjoy your spa day. What do I get for being good?

Celeste: a wife who won’t make you sleep in the guest room. And if you’re really good we can talk about the white one again. 

Dumo: I’ll be good!!! 😇😇😇😇😇 

Celeste: 😉

——

Thursday 5.00 pm 

Dumo created a group chat. 

Dumo added Sunny, Sergei, Brady, Kuny, Nado and LoganT 

Dumo named the group chat talent show 

Dumo: gentlemen I believe you’ve all had your fates sealed. We’re now sentenced to suffer through the horror of our kids’ school talent show.

LoganT: what am I doing here? I don’t have kids leave me out 

Dumo: you left your disgusting workout clothes in MY basement. Without cleaning it up. You’re coming. Also Leo and Finn are both with their families. And Celeste made me take you cause apparently you’re sad and mopey. 🤓

LoganT: I’m not sad and mopey. I’m brooding and there’s a big difference. 😠

Sunny: you’re 22 and your boyfriends are out of town. Chin up buddy and enjoy a Saturday of off key singing and recorder hell. And you are moping 😆 brooding is for grown-ups… 

Nado: we’d offer to take you to some strip clubs and get you laid but. Well. We don’t really frequent gay bars so. 

Sergei: really? I once had to rescue u 2 from drag club 😂

Nado: it was one time and we didn’t realize until we were inside. Felt like a fucking Kingggg man they know how to party. Wanna go to a drag club baby Logan? Is fun times! 

Kuny: was fun. But we promise to do show with baby Russians he he 👻👻👻👻

Nado: well i didn’t understand what i said yes to. Thought she asked if I wanted to play Pokémon. 😳

Sergei: that’s why she asked. She’s too sneaky. Not like it. What you do for show? 

Nado: no idea. Your wife is making us an outfit and told us to just stand in the background 🙈

Dumo: oh I’m recording this. Anyways there’s never any parking. You’d think with the obscene fees we pay for that school they could at least organize proper parking. Let’s carpool. 😎

LoganT: why are you carpooling? You’ve got like a combined car catalogue of 25 cars....... 

Brady: this is clearly Logan’s first rodeo. Okay. Sergei always brings some Russian elixir of life. So. We need you to drive. 😘

LoganT: IM NOT DRIVING A MINI VAN! IVE GOT A REP 

Nado: there’s alcohol involved? I’m in!! 🥳🥳🥳🥳

Sunny: only way to get through this....😔

Dumo: you don’t have a rep. You have two boyfriends, an accent and a sweaty hat. You’re driving and I’m not going to argue. 😠 

—- 

Saturday 12.33 pm 

Dumodad: if anyone is wondering what the terrible two are up to this fine Saturday. They’re currently in the middle of a moving rendition of Into the Unknown. Yes they’re wearing blue sequins. 🤩

*kuny and nado dressed in blue glitter sequins onesies with a bunch of kids singing into the unknown* 

Prongstar: HHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA WHAT IS GOING ONNNN???? 

Blizzard: well. There’s a future in show biz for those two. 😂 kuznetsov and nadeau the movie. 

Bradygunz: this is giving me some fresh prince vibes little rays of sunshine!!!😂😂😂😂 @talkiewalkie 

Talkiewalkie: yesss!!! Hahahah 😎😎😎

 ——- 

Saturday 1.22 pm 

Sunny: I love my kids but. There’s a reason it’s not a good idea to always just tell kids they’re good at stuff.

Dumo: hahahah the one with the juggling was fun. 

LoganT: why are we still here? I won’t ever get my hearing back after that bag pipe thing. 😭

Sergei: that’s why we drink. I like the politic ones like a kid could ever know so many isms 

Sunny: quit hogging the flask. Gimme. 

Brady: I didn’t know so many isms existed. Pretty sure some of them were just random words. 😂

——

Saturday 2.01 pm

Logantremblayzzz: guess who’s pissed at a kids talent show. Guess who’s hit on every teacher and has suspiciously disappeared and guess who’s somehow ended up in a production of you’re welcome from Moana? 

Sirius: this is fun.... 1) the dads are pissed. I went to a school play with them once. Sergei brought his flask? 2) I wanna say Nado 3) Kuny? 

Blizzard: ohhh I’ve got 2/3 swapped - Kuny can’t sing in English... and nado’s got the tattoos 😂

Eliascookie: I wanna know more about the sequins? 🥳

Prongstar: tell us!!!  

Logantremblayzzz: 1) yes the dads. Sergei swears it’s only mild vodka. But they’re definitely not sober. 2) Kuny was missing but I found him. He is hiding in the library. 3) yes Nado has somehow ended up on stage again. He’s doing that pec thing it’s weird. I swear the moms here are swooning. He signed someone’s bra. ITS A SCHOOL. 

KrisVolley: you’re just cranky that you had to drive the mini van. Haha! 😂

CarbO’Hara: Logan! You drove a minivan? 🤪🤪🤪🤪 cuteeee 

Logantremblayzzz: it’s stupid and ugly. 🥴 

Dumodad: suits you then 🤪

Logantremblayzzz: I’m telling your wives. 

Sergei_81: no Logan. Don’t be mean. U can have my car 

Bradygunz: we don’t tell Celeste when you leo and Finn cause problems!!!! 

Dumodad: he’s bluffing! Remember who let you live FOR FREE in his basement! I do your laundry and feed you. 

Logantremblayzzz: celeste feeds me and does laundry. You’re just as much a leech. 

Dumodad: I pay for things. 😠

RussianGod: I don’t know where are. Books everywhere help I hide from moms so many everywhere 😳😳😳😳

Ollibear: someone please rescue Kuny before the soccer moms kidnap him 😂

Timmyforrealz: wow Kuny go get some cougar love 🐯🐯🐯🐯🐯 hehehehe 

RussianGod: I scared. Help. @dumodad @logantremblayzzz @sergei_81!!!!!! Help help 

Sunnysideup: DONT flirt with them then. You asked for it. I’ll come get you. Stay in the library. You’re missing nado singing. 

——

Saturday 2.12 pm 

Logan: hey Celeste. Show is ok. How’s the spa??? ❤️❤️❤️

Celeste: charmer... it’s fine thank you - how are the boys?

Logan: uh. Well. 

Celeste: one sec love. 

—-

Celeste added Logan to the group chat 

Celeste: hi Logan! Please tell us about the show. How did the terrible two do with their performance 

Logan: well Katya got scared and refused to go on stage so Kuny had to hold her hand. It was really cute. Loved the outfits. They’re definitely never forgetting that 😂 other than that your husbands are sneaking drinks from sergei’s flask and Nado has been in stage for the past three performances 

Anya: he did what? I will kill him. Thank you for telling us Logan. Tell zhenya to be careful. Soccer moms are hungry.

Logan: will do. Want me to kick your husbands? 

Anya: no love. We have our own ways to punish our idiots 😈

Linnea: thanks Logan! 

Celeste removed Logan from the group chat. 

Celeste: well. I knew we couldn’t leave them alone. But the plan worked well - they’ve now signed themselves up for the events for the rest of the school year! 😎

Allison: 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 

—-

Celeste: Logan texted me. Do you have any idea how much trouble you all are in? Also someone go rescue Kuny. He’s not ready for a soccer mom. 😈

Dumo: I’m gonna kill that kid. Also sorry. But. There was a BAGPIPE. You’re very pretty and beautiful and I love you. Sunny has gone to rescue Kuny. 

Celeste: hmm. How are you going to fix it? 

Dumo: I’ll show you 😜 on my knees 👅

Celeste: 😈

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