#green eyes trans young | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

soreddieforit · 1 month

Text

@croptopjames happy birthday to the one and only jfp <3

jegulus | 933 words | trans reg & themes of gender identity and transition

Regulus felt his cheeks heat up as he snapped out of his daze and met James' eyes. He was wearing a knowing look, "Oh, I'm definitely keeping this," James declared, his smirk widening. "Especially if it gets this kind of reaction from you every time."

Regulus’ room was a disaster. James had finally coaxed him into sorting through his old clothes, only managing after he bribed him with promises of kisses and takeout afterwards. The closet had all but exploded, leaving piles of clothes scattered all across the room. With ‘yes’s,’ and ‘no’s,’ and ‘maybes’ occupying every available flat surface, Regulus was sure he hadn't seen the darkened wood of his floor in hours.

Sat on his bed, he watched as James dug through his dresser for another shirt. He let out a thoughtful hum as he grabbed two, throwing one over his shoulder and holding up the other: an awful plum-colored blouse. His mother had bought it for him—form-fitting, smothered in ruffles, and, in her words, “the perfect blouse for a sophisticated young woman.”

Regulus thought it was the ugliest fucking shirt he had ever seen.

“Ugh,” Regulus wrinkled his nose in distaste. “Absolutely not, that thing is a monstrosity.”

James barked out a laugh, amused at the disgust evident on Regulus' face, before flinging the shirt into the rapidly growing ‘no’ pile. He grabbed at the one resting on his shoulder.

“And this one?”

It was worn, fabric soft from years of wear. The dark green and gray had dulled, now just muted shadows of their original hues. The words printed on the front, cracked and creased, read ‘Hogwarts Women's Rowing’. It had been his favorite shirt for a long time. His parents had always been on him to join something– a club, a team, an honor society. If he was honest, he only chose rowing because it kept him out of the house the longest.

And he's so grateful he did, because it brought him Pandora. He suffered through early morning rows and long race days, soreness in his body and blisters on his hands. But every discomfort was worth it for the times he and Pandora would steal an extra hour to lie in the sun by the Great Lake, laughing until their bellies felt as sore as their arms. Worth it for the times Evan would cram them into his shitty jeep and drive them to their races so they didn't have to take the bus. Worth it, most of all, for giving him the first people with whom he could be honest—really, truly honest.

"I don't want to get rid of it," Regulus admitted, a hint of reluctance in his voice. "It was my favorite, but—I’m not ready to wear anything that might make people mistake me for a woman. Not for a while, at least.”

James nodded. He turned the shirt around, head tilting slightly as he considered it. “How about I hold onto it for you? That way it's not gone, just... repurposed.” He looked up at Regulus with a wicked grin. “I bet I could pull it off.”

Regulus couldn’t help but scoff as James began to pull on the shirt. “I’d like to see you try," he challenged, amusement evident in his voice.

But as James stretched out his arms and did a little spin, Regulus wasn't laughing. Instead, he felt his heart swoop. A familiar mixture of fondness and arousal swirled in his gut at the sight of James. Glasses knocked a little lopsided from pulling the shirt on, pajama pants hanging low on his hips and socked feet– it was a picture that made Regulus go warm with affection. But, it was the shirt that really kept his attention. Visibly too small, the letters strained as they stretched across the width of his chest. The hem of it hitting right below his navel, exposing his hip bones and the trail of hair leading down from his belly button. Regulus felt all the breath leave his chest. “C'mere,” he said softly.

James shuffled over to him. “Good?” He asked, a hint of uncertainty in his tone.

Regulus shook his head, he was in awe of James. “Better than good. It suits you much better than it ever did me,” he mumbled, voice low and distracted. Reaching out to place his hands on James' waist, he absentmindedly dragged his thumbs back and forth over his hipbones, eyes stuck to the sliver of skin peeking out from beneath the shirt.

“My eyes are up here, love,” James gently teased, his voice laced with amusement.

“I lied,” Regulus deadpanned, “you actually look ridiculous.” But his face was betraying him, unable to fight the smile spreading across it.

James hummed in response, the smugness in his tone unmistakable. He was clearly enjoying every moment of this.

"Oh, shut up," Regulus groaned playfully, his hands gripping the exposed skin at his waist to pull him down. James yelped in surprise before their lips were meeting in a kiss filled more with laughter than anything else. But then James was deepening it, and Regulus let himself be kissed breathless. After a moment, he gently pulled back, hand tenderly stroking through James’ hair.

"Thank you," he whispered, his hand tracing a path down James' neck, over his shoulder, and along the length of his arm until their fingers intertwined. "For being here, for—everything. Everything that you do for me."

James responded with a gentle squeeze of their hands, his eyes meeting Regulus’. "Always, love." His voice was soft but firm in promise. And there it was again, his heart swooping in his chest as James pressed a kiss to his temple. "Always."

#i initially had other plans for my submission #but i went in a diff direction thanks to the transphobe in my dm's. enjoy the fluff of jamie and his trans bf!#also literally dont ask me why i picked rowing i have no idea LMFAO #jegulus #regulus black #james potter #croptopjames #jegulus fic #jegulus microfic #marauders #starchaser

217 notes · View notes

jevilowo · 22 days

Text

Headcanons about the mercs' childhoods

Because I spend far too much time thinking about this

Scout was and still is the only one of his brothers to not have black hair and green eyes, and thus the only one to not look like his Ma. Growing up he was always told he was "the spit of his father".

Soldier was popular with the girls in grade school because he beat up any boys who bothered them.

Pyro is, and has always been well aware that pyroland is a fire induced hallucination. They just don't care that they're burning people to death. ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥.

Demo would busk (play music in the streets for money) sometimes in his early teens to get his mother of his back about jobs. Also because he genuinely enjoyed it. He played bagpipes and piano.

Heavy learned how to play chess and how to box from his father. Later on, he taught the same to his sisters.

Engie was obsessed with stuffed toys when he was young, and still is (he has four plushie cosmetics and thats not even counting the animals that may or may not be alive)

Medic was born after his mother (a witch) mpregged some guy she was trying to blackmail.

Sniper was non verbal until he was six, when his dad taught him to shoot a rifle. The first thing he ever said was something like "bloody brilliant, can I do that again?"

Spy woke up in a white room when he was ten and that's his earliest memory. His agency picked him up from god knows where, completely wiped his memory and trained him (and many other kids) to spy.

Oh yeah and they're all trans

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 headcanons #tf2 scout #tf2 soldier #tf2 pyro #tf2 demoman #tf2 heavy #tf2 engineer #tf2 medic #tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #trans fortress 2

188 notes · View notes

zzprompto · 4 months

Text

thanks for requesting. i accidentally deleted this draft, luckily i had a screenshot of the request.

☆ mutual

cloud strife x ftm reader [he / him]

sypnosis: above.

the lowercase is intentional !

cloud and [name] were friend ever since they were little.

sure, the two boys weren't that close with eachother, but they were still friends. even if cloud talked to tifa most of the time and went off to join the soldier program, the two of them were still friends. no matter what.

[name] had always liked cloud. the young boy liked how strong willed cloud was and how determined the blonde was to be the number one solider. it really inspired [name], and made him fawn over cloud.

but he'd never say anything, of course. he was too scared and he never knew if cloud reciprocated. [name] was a trans boy after all, so what if cloud didn't even like him as a guy? it would break the boy into little pieces. he wouldn't be able to take it.

what [name] didn't know was that cloud felt the same. cloud always liked [name], not tifa, not zack or anyone else. just [name]. he always wanted to get closer to [name] and confess, but he couldn't. he was scared of rejection, the same way that [name] was. but that didn't stop either from liking one another.

it had been a few years since the two past met, cloud had left nibelheim to join the soldier program and [name] left to explore midgar. they hadn't caught up or seen eachother ever since then.

[name] was walking around wall market, taking in the vibrant lights outside the various buildings and the bustling nightlife. he had been there multiple times before, but each time it felt like the first.

there were so many things to explore at wall market, so many things to try. that's why [name] kept coming back. it was a fun experience, not just for the honey bee in or the various attractions in honour of don corneo. the buildings themselves and the people are what attracted [name].

[name] was minding his business, doing his usual as he went around the area. he looked at a few shops, inspected some materia and weapons on display and he got some food.

the young man decided to walk around with his food, which ended up being a bad idea. there were huge crowds everywhere on this particular day, and he just happened to bump into someone.

all of [name]'s food went flying, straight onto the floor. it was all ruined. people were stepping on it as it dropped to the floor, so [name] definitely wouldn't be able to eat it anymore.

[name] groaned and he looked down at the floor in annoyance before speaking, because the person he had bumped into for some reason hadn't left yet.

"you should watch where you're going next time." [name] grumbled to himself, unsure if the other person actually heard him or not. to his surprise, they did.

"you should also watch where you're going, some people are in a hurry." the person scoffed, and their voice sounded oddly familiar.

[name] raised his eyebrow and he looked up, still annoyed at the fact that this stranger made him drop his food. "well that's not my problem, is it? my problem is the fact that you made me drop my food. i spent a lot of gil on that-"

then, that's when [name] saw who it was that bumped into him.

it was cloud.

his old friend and crush was standing right there infront of him as multiple people barged past the two of them. [name] couldn't believe his eyes.

"holy shit." [name]'s mouth dropped as he stared infront at cloud. he did not think he was going to run into cloud at wall market of all places. shouldn't he be doing some soldier training right now anyway?

[name] wasn't mistaken. he thought he was seeing things but it truly was cloud infront of him.

the striking blonde hair, but with the ponytail now gone. the blue eyes that had a hint of green in them due to the mako. the pale skin that was reflecting all of the neon signs.

it truly was cloud. [name] wasn't seeing things.

"cloud? what are you doing here?" [name] asked, scanning cloud's figure once more to triple check he wasn't hallucinating.

cloud was a little confused at first. he didn't 100% recognise who was infront of him. [name] had grown up and transitioned into being who he truly meant to be.

"[name]?" cloud responded, taking a good look at the man infront of him. it was [name], cloud wasn't hallucinating either.

[name] nodded and he immediately hugged cloud, not believing the fact that his friend was there infront of him still. he didn't know how to grasp the situation. it had been years since they last met and there were no goodbyes shared or anything.

cloud was a little startled by the sudden hug, but he decided to embrace it anyway. it wasn't going to hurt. he was just hugging his old friend.. his old crush.

cloud felt like he was a kid again.

the poor guy was blushing again and he felt his stomach churn. he couldn't believe this was happening.

why now of all times? why were the memories flooding back to him? all the times that [name] and cloud would stay up late to talk or play games.. it all came rushing back.

"i didn't think i was going to ever see you again.." [name] confessed, whispering into cloud's ear softly. he was so happy to see cloud after all these years, cloud had to know.

"neither did i." cloud responded, chuckling lightly to himself as he ended up reciprocating the hug.

he wished he could stay in [name]'s arms forever - but he couldn't. he had a mission to do for avalanche, he had to save tifa. he couldn't stay in [name]'s arms for too long. he had things to do.

"[name] i'm sorry.. i have to go." cloud sighed, stepping back from the hug and looking at [name] with a frown. he didn't want this to end so soon.

"what?" [name] also took a step back, feeling all upset now. the smile he had on his face was wiped away in instant.

the man shook his head and he grabbed cloud's arm, keeping him in place. he wasn't letting him go this time. he was going to tell him everything. he didn't care if cloud was going to be late to whatever he's doing. he was selfish, but for good reasons.

"cloud, you can't just leave me after we've not seen eachother for years!" [name] started, still keeping a firm grip on cloud's arm. he sure as hell wasn't letting the blonde go yet.

"i haven't stopped thinking of you all this time.. and now you're back but you want to leave me again." [name] sighed, letting go of cloud's arm. it seems as if he has given up so quickly.

[name] looked away, crossing his arms over his chest. there was still a frown on his face and it was clear to cloud that he was hurting.

cloud wished he could comfort [name], hug him, kiss him or something else but he couldn't. time was running out, but it felt so slow when he was around [name].

"i should've told you then that i liked you. maybe if i wasn't a coward, you wouldn't of left and we would've been able to be something then.. but it's too late." [name] sighed again. he didn't even know if cloud was listening. "something else is clearly more important, so you should probably just go and do that thing then."

cloud couldn't believe what he had just heard. [name] liked him too? well, that changes everything. maybe cloud can spare a few minutes..

"seriously?" cloud spoke up, walking closer to [name] and holding one of his hands. he couldn't believe that [name] felt the same way he did.

"that.. feeling is mutual. i liked you back then too, but i was also too scared to say anything." cloud frowned slightly and it seemed that he had forgotten about everything else going on in his life.

[name] looked back at cloud, his frown slowly fading away. he was glad that cloud shared the sentiment, even if his confession was more of a 'heat of the moment' thing.

the man took in a deep breath before he spoke again, looking at his love with a smile on his face now.

"i'm glad to know that, cloud. i really am.." [name] says as he brushes a few strands of hair out of cloud's face. "i seriously didn't think you were interested in me at all. i thought you would've fallen in love with someone at the soldier program or something." [name] laughed.

cloud smiled in return. it was a small smile, but it still managed to melt [name]'s heart after years of not seeing it.

"i'd really like to catch up someday." [name] hummed and cloud let go of him, nodding at the other's words.

"of course." cloud responded, definitely wanting to catch up with [name]. they had a lot to catch up on. dates, kisses, hugs.. and even more.

[name] cleared his throat and he looked away, remembering that cloud had something important to do.

"you should.. go now. don't you have something important to do?" [name] mumbled, a heat rising to his face as he felt suddenly embarrassed for no reason.

cloud nodded and he gave [name] a quick kiss on the cheek, letting the other know that the feelings are still there. he then walked away from [name], going to do what he had to do.

"i'm glad our feelings are mutual!" [name] called out as cloud walked away.

cloud had a huge blush on his face as he walked, feeling flustered that a bunch of people now knew about his situation with [name].

at least the feeling was mutual...

☆ author's note: hope you enjoy! for those who have been waiting for p2 of the fyodor x male reader fic, it'll be out soon i promise!! i feel so bad for making you all wait 😭 i might also start writing for re2 and re4, so you can request for characters from those games!

☆ masterlist ▪︎ request

94 notes · View notes

masterthrutimenspace · 1 year

Text

Been thinking a lot ab transfem 2012 leo lately,,,, :]

I love she. I like to think she secretly wears eye makeup under her mask while still in the closet. She's just happy to know she has it on even if no one else sees it. Sad that she can't put anything on her actual eyelids or she'll get caught :( so she just kinda puts it around her eyes. It still looks good when her eyes are open.

And she's actually like good at it too, making art on her face. She tries it once and suddenly it's her favorite past time hobby (even above Space Heroes), trying out different looks and styles. She searches up color theory and complexions and everything, though she has to learn a lot by herself since she has green skin. She's probably watched a thousand makeup videos. And she keeps this up for months without being caught, being the ninja that she is. It becomes so normal to her to the point that when her mask flies off during a fight with some bad guy she doesn't even realize how big a deal it is at first, lol.

After she does get found out she just says she likes makeup, not mentioning anything about being trans. April is ecstatic about Leo's hobby and buys her all kinds of makeup stuff like fake eyelashes, despite April herself not being that into makeup. Karai joins in too, teaching Leo some edgier looks. Sometimes they wear matching makeup.

Raph and Donnie are a bit weirded out at first but they can see this is, for some reason, important to Leo so they refrain from making any rude comments, even if just jokingly. Mikey loves it, he is fully supportive. Probably asks Leo to do his makeup once or twice. He is a bit jealous that Leo is trying to take his place as the cutest turtle though.

Raph appriciates the artsiness of it and the level of skill it would take to do that. He still thinks it's weird but he warms up to it.

Donnie does not at all get it but it makes his "brother" happy so it it what it is. And he will admit it is pretty cute.

Despite what everyone would have expected, Splinter doesn't make a big deal out of it. He just asks what the occasion is. Leo's new hobby doesn't get in the way of anything and it makes his "son" happy. He can also appriciate the time and effort of the craft. He'd probably be curious to know some of the techniques. Not for any purpose, just pure curiosity.

Casey would randomly walk into the lair one day and think Leo is some new sister of theirs. Which, technically he's not wrong. Leo is silently having a gender moment after Casey calls her a girl while Raph is laughing at Casey's confusion on the situation.

Casey doesn't know shit about makeup (me too fam) but he thinks it's badass that Leo is confidently wearing it. Screw toxic masculinity and all that shit. He goes on a random rant about his sister wanting to try makeup but thinking she's too young for that stuff (does she have a canon age? I imagine her being like 11). Leo tells him he should give his sister a chance to try it out, that it's just a fun activity and doesn't mean anything. Leo gives him like a whole lecture how makeup is about how it makes the person wearing it feel and not looking good for someone else. So Casey ends up deciding he's gonna give his sister some basic makeup stuff for her birthday (or Christmas, whichever comes first). Leo is satisfied.

Later that day Casey would ask Leo to help him decide what to give his sister and Leo is happy to help. What she doesn't expect though is for Casey to just straight up ask if she's trans. She panics. Casey panics at Leo's panic and splutters apologies for asking so suddenly, reassuring her that he's fully supportive if she is trans. So Leo comes out to him. And it feels nice. It's nice to have someone else know, to not carry it alone. Even though she was not at all prepared or ready to come out to anyone yet. She went to sleep feeling lighter that day.

#tmnt 2012 #transfem leo #tmnt leo 2012 #leonardo #trans leo #casey jones #They are all so supportive #i love this hc so much #Feel free to use this in a fic #Just tag me plzplzplzplz #rafa rambles

824 notes · View notes

beerecordings · 6 months

Text

i have seen people put together some background canon info about the egos and their appearances over the years, which is awesome and a huge feat, but I just wanted to compile some popular headcanons and fanon interpretations that might be relevant if someone new was trying to get into the fandom, or even that we may see references for in new canon. it's our CULTURE okay??

Chase having two kids: when Sean released CHASE he announced that Chase canonically has/had one child, but in Chase's original video he referred to Stacy taking the "kids," which lead to the popular interpretation that Chase had two young children. you might still see this around

Henrik's backstory: likewise, Sean used to make occasional references to Henrik having an ex-wife and possibly kids. some people consider this canon and others don't, because it was just in random gameplay vids, but you might see it referenced

Anti is a turtle: an OG ego meme. when Anti says "I am eternal" in Say Goodbye, it sounds like "I am a turtle." Sean saw this and reacted to it in a vid, and now there are occasional turtle references

Queer egos: obviously this is tumblr and queer headcanons abound. in my experience, the most popular interpretations include Jackie being trans and Marvin being mlm. you will see this frequently in the fandom

JJ's mutism: JJ first appears in a silent video with captions like an old-time movie, but Sean didn't confirm that he has mutism until later, and also incorporated British Sign Language in his most recent video. older portrayals of JJ - or less inclusive ones - might not feature his mutism. additionally you may encounter a variety of magical or practical aids to help him communicate. oh, and you might also hear JJ called Dapper Jack - we were the ones who named him Jameson Jackson!

Eye color: throughout the years the glitches that suggested Jack might be making ego content frequently featured changes in his eye color. Sean has had brown, green, pure black, and mismatched eyes on different occasions. it's unknown if these correspond to particular egos, but Anti has appeared with green, blue, and black most frequently

Henrik being tortured for nine months: after Henrik was attacked by Anti during a video, Jack posted a bloodied postcard depicting a beach in Germany. this lead to the popular conception that Henrik was taken by Anti and may have been tortured by him. the length of time between seeing him again was nine months

Jack in a coma: this is more canon than fanon, but we've been saying that Jack's been in a coma for years and years now, pretty much since Anti first got his hands on him. Jack later had a voiceover in a video where Chase told Jack he needs him to wake up.

shipping: some of the most popular ships include Marvin/Jackie and Chase/Henrik. you'll also see some Darkiplier/Anti. although the egos all look the same, there's no canon suggestion that any of them are related at this time.

friendships: Chase canonically refers to Jack as his friend, and the fact that Henrik tried to help save Jack has led to the popular conception that he and Chase at least know each other, and are possibly friends too. the others? no clue. oh except maybe probably Anti is holding JJ captive who knows

Phoenix Marvin: Jack once referred to Marvin as a phoenix from the ashes in a tumblr post and we all lost our minds about it. great motif. and of course he wears the cat mask, so you'll see a lot of Marvin with cats or being able to turn into a cat. his magical powers are not canon yet, so you'll see a huge variety, as well as magic or superpowers for other egos too

please feel free to add on to this!! I'm curious what would stand out to everyone else if they were trying to share the fanon with someone new

#jacksepticeye

93 notes · View notes

obsolete-stars-if · 1 year

Text

Obsolete Stars

Last Update: 20th/April 2024

Last updated word count: + 19k including code Read time: ~5h 45min Join the discord

Currently available: Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 full

Take me to the demo. Now.

Disclaimer: While I do have an outline, this is a first draft/proof of concept situation. There will be many errors and things like personality options, and further expansion of the world around you, will be expanded once the first draft is done. Thank you for understanding.

Intro

So let’s be real, we all read fanfiction that followed the prompt of “Help, my parents sold me off to [insert boy band/ celebrate crush/ tumblr sexy man of the week)!”, but unlike those fanfictions, you weren’t sold off to your hot crush. After a life in isolation, your father, the king, sells you off to marry the prince of another country. With nothing but two guards, you make your way to meet the dreaded fate of marriage. Along the way, you will make friends, learn the truth about your kingdom, and find yourself in positions much worse than a forced marriage. One can only pray for your survival.

In this game you will explore your kingdom and what happened to the magic realm. It will include sensitive topics, and possible explicit content in the future.

The game focuses on interpersonal relationships.

What else?

Play as Male, Female, Nonbinary (option to customize your pronouns, future trans options planned)

Date one (or more) of your 7 friends

Play as straight, queer, poly, mono, or just be aro or ace

Be a total ass to your spouse or just accept your fate

Have fun seeing your kingdom in ruins!

Get your friends killed

Get yourself killed

Ę̸̱͌̌x̷͖̕p̵̣̰͐̓e̴̡̪̓̇r̸̨̹̉͘i̷͍̮̎͝e̴͇͋̒n̸̢̼͠c̵͎̳̓̈́e̵͙͇̽̄ ̴̼̈́͒j̵̨̢̈́͆ṳ̸͝͠d̶̝̈̇g̴̨͉̀̏e̸͎͒͛m̷̳̪̓ẽ̶̙͉ń̶͕͋t̵̺̾ ̵̘̓́d̵̹̈́å̵͚ȳ̸͓͗

Okay cool, but what about dating?

Tarek/Takischa (he/him; she/her) (Ftm/Mtf) (genderselectable)

Old and grumpy, TK is 15 years your senior and has been serving the palace your entire life. They are stoic and devoted to the crown, they take their job more than serious, sometimes they can even parental or possessive. Underneath their blank face, you know they care for you, and they always will.

They are 6′3 and have ashen honey hair, curly and cutting off just above their eyes. Pale green eyes set deep against their ivory skin. They hide almost all of their skin with layers of clothing.

(Great if you have parental issues.)

Samuel/Samira (he/him; she/her) (Ftm/Mtf) (genderselectable)

Young and curious, Sammy is just a year younger than yourself, they can be naive and easy trusting. They’re optimistic and want to impress you and all their friends. Sammy has a lot to learn, and they’re more than eager to do so. With enough care and time, Sammy will grow into a great protector.

Sammy is 5′9 with very short black hair. Against their warm beige skin tone, their monolidded eyes are a deep reddish brown. They wear simple robust clothes.

Sammy is ace and sex neutral.

(Great if you don’t enjoy angst)

Alia (she/they) (afab)

A quiet person, she keeps to herself, but always stays polite, she is a shrine maiden and TKs friend. She is a peacemaker at heart, and tries to deescalate every situation. She would be considered one of the strongest magic users, if she would ever use it. She is about six years your senior.

Alia is 5′3 and has bronze hair that is cut into a short wolf hairstyle. Blue eyes against satin freckled skin. She wears a lavender dress, with white clothing to cover her arm.

Alia is ace and sex repulsed.

(Great if you like slow burn)

Sascha (He/they) (Ftm)

He is about ten years older, but that can be quickly forgotten by how charming, egotistical and even cowardly he can act. He is not only a danger to you and your friends, but themselves too. He pulls danger from beyond your understanding into your orbit. He is a teasing smart ass that isn’t above blackmailing or hurting anyone. Not to forget that he committed the highest crime there is, stealing a magic companions.

They are 6′1 and have long grey-white hair that falls to his hips. He has very pale skin and ice blue eyes. He wears high quality clothes, and a golden jacket that fades into a deep red.

Sascha is ace and sex positive.

(Great test of your patience.)

Kate (she/her) (Mtf)

Just a few years older than you, she is noble and a healer, she is a loud and loving personality. With teasing smile, she cares deeply about everyone’s well-being, but will never be above calling anyone out.

She is 6′0, her chocolate goddess locs fall beneath her shoulders, the curls fading into a pink color. Dark deep brown eyes against warm yet ashen honey skin tone. She wears pink toned dresses and many accessories.

(Great if you like women.)

Mikhail (he/they) (amab)

The prince of Riag, your spouse, and the second general. His easy going and considerate personality makes it hard to grasp, that he is celebrated by his own soldiers and nobles of his country, deeply feared by anyone outside his country. A war criminal for his country. Beloved warrior, lover of war. He is only a few years your senior.

Mikail is 5′7 and their dark brown hair would fall to his shoulders, if it wasn’t pulled back into a ponytail. The tips of his hair fading into an earthy, almost blueish green tone, matching his eyes against his cool olive skin tone. He wears short clothing due to the heat in Riag and the many training sessions they have daily.

(Great if you believe everyone deserves a second chance.)

Gigi (she/her) (afab)

She promised Judgement Day.

Gigi is 5′6 and with ash blonde hair curling around her soft face frame, cutting off just below her ears, and light brown, almost hazel eyes. She wears primarily black with orange accessories.

Unofficial official RO Art/Ref

Moodboards, color palettes, playlist for each RO here:

Maps and miscellaneous stuff:

307 notes · View notes

ranticore · 1 month

Text

Chapter 2 - To Be Human

for tdov i'll post my most trans coded character, more trans than any of the others tbh. obviously it's ishmael

---

Forward by the author | Chapter 1

In a bright white room with a single large round window, a young Ishmael sits on a bed. The edge of a rock ridge curves across the view beyond the window. Ishmael looks out through the window at the sheer sides, one hand pressed to the glass so that the light diffuses red through his skin. He is twelve years old and wears a shapeless blue and green garment that does not fit him, pinching tight around his neck but loose across his shoulders. A sipho nymph flies past the window and he turns to follow it.

Voice of Maris: What was that? Did you see it?

Ishmael: Not really. Too fast.

Maris: That was one of those – what are the zoologists calling them again? It’s a different name every time I hear it.

Ishmael: Exosiphonid.

Maris: I think they’re scary. Like giant dragonflies.

Ishmael: Did Surwan see it?

Maris: Who’s Surwan?

Ishmael: This girl in the biology class. She wanted to see an exosiphonid.

Maris: I didn’t know you were in the biology class. Was it good?

Throughout the video, Ishmael does not make eye contact with Maris or the recording device. He appears to hide behind a curtain of hair and hunch in on himself while he is not looking out through the window.

Ishmael: Dan said I could join next semester. I was waiting outside.

Maris: And eavesdropping?

Maris: I think it’s admirable to want to learn. What do you want to learn about? Is there anything that interests you? I’m no biologist, really.

Ishmael: Surwan likes the flying ones, like siphos. Callum wants to learn about leviathans.

Maris: That sounds exciting. Would you like to learn about leviathans too?

Ishmael: Lee doesn’t think they’re real. He said the betas wouldn’t get made if there were monsters in the water.

Maris: I don’t think Lee is a trustworthy source on that, if you want my opinion. Would you like to find out the truth? Imagine if you were the first to see a leviathan, they might name it after you.

——

The video transcribed above is a very typical example of Maris’s early sessions with Ishmael. He appears to resist all of her attempts to get him to submit an original thought, and repeatedly refers to the Human children instead, those who are undergoing a structured education about the zoology of Siren.

Maris’s notes echo my own understanding – that Ishmael struggled to articulate anything beyond a constant wish to be included with the other children, to the point of eavesdropping on classes he was not allowed to attend.

His passing curiosity about the wildlife around the settlement served only as a means to connect with the other children. And he was repeatedly shunned for these attempts, as Callum’s diary later noted. Those children whose likes and ambitions he carefully memorised did not think of him the way he thought of them. In fact, as far as I can tell, they did not think of him at all, because he was not a peer in any real sense.

This video also acknowledges the existence of the beta generation of Sirenians, who largely resembled modern phocids, though smaller and with shorter tails. It is important to state that although modern phocids descend from this beta generation, they do not descend from Ishmael. In fact, nobody descends from Ishmael, despite legends and myths to the contrary. This was stated explicitly several times by both Ishmael as an adult and Dan Loris, but made clear to Ishmael by Maris during these sessions.

“The other children are learning about how to make babies,” Ishmael announced at a session one day. “Dan wouldn’t let me stay. He never lets me stay.”

“You don’t need to know any of that,” Maris said. “You’re different to the other kids, remember? You don’t have a body that makes babies. Honestly, that’s a pretty sweet deal if you ask me. Can we swap?”

Her attempts at reassuring him seemed to fall on deaf ears, because reminders of his differences were often poorly received by Ishmael, or ignored. He paused to think about what she said, wondering how she could envy him when all he wanted in the world was to be like her.

“How do I get one?” he asked.

“A baby?”

“A body that makes them. I asked Dan and he said the betas can do it.”

“Well, yes,” Maris said, now wondering exactly how much it was appropriate to delve into he topic. “You don’t want to be like a beta, though, do you?”

Ishmael visibly shuddered. “No! But I want to be like Callum, can Dan do that? I’m getting better at being upright, so maybe if I practice more I can change.”

Thwarting Ishmael’s one desire was the absolute fact that his genetics were set in stone, and he could not be retroactively made fully Human. These sessions reveal a seam of anxiety, too, over the beta generation. At the time there were twenty of them, living in a separate location where they had access to a test pool.

Repeatedly, during the sessions with Maris, Ishmael brings them up as a potential bad ending for him, the inverse of his great desire to become like the other Humans. Those beta phocids were less Humanoid than Ishmael himself was. He believed that by mimicking the Human children he could become more similar to them, but the opposite could also be true, and the wrong actions might cause him to degenerate into a beta phocid.

Unfortunately for him, his efforts at being ‘upright’ did not result in any permanent bipedalism. When he was fourteen, his unpredictable growth had shifted his proportions away from the more Humanlike ratio he’d been born with. He was finding it more difficult to stand up straight, instead adopting a hunched and arched posture which still left him standing taller than the children of his age whose attention he coveted. The onset of puberty and these shifts in his body were tortuous, and it was a time that lasted until his mid-thirties when he finally reached his adult size and proportions.

But there was an improvement noted by both Dan Loris and Maris – despite repeatedly displaying signs of distress and depression in his sessions with her, he was no longer wordlessly violent, and did not give himself to his rages anymore.

Maris had provided him with the one thing he needed at the time – a safe person to talk to, someone who asked him how he was feeling without taking it as some scientific data point. She reported it all to Dan Loris, of course, but did not tell Ishmael that. He believed that she was his only safe harbour in the entire world.

Maris, in her own notes, says pretty much the same. And she was fond of him, too, revealing a genuine affection towards him alongside a deep abiding worry that she was not doing enough to ease his distress, and that she could have done more. She admits that she was not a trained psychologist, just someone in the settlement who had spare time and some textbooks. Her actual job was as a water quality specialist and she was acutely conscious that she had not the qualifications nor educational background necessary to help Ishmael properly. The settlement had a number of psychologists but they were not associated with the lab and did not volunteer their time.

To pre-empt the same problems with tantrums arising in the beta phocids, Maris was also supposed to spend some time with them, too. But she discovered that, with the exception of one, they were actually rather well-adjusted compared to Ishmael, likely as a result of their group all living together and being able to form a small close-knit community. Ishmael was deprived of this.

And, most importantly, the beta phocids could see themselves reflected in their community and use their bonds as a lens to make sense of themselves. Ishmael lacked this factor, and had no reflections or counterparts that he could use to understand himself. He was isolated by being unique, and by his inability to see the phocids as anything other than strange creatures he was embarrassed to somewhat resemble.

But it’s also patently clear that Maris, and Dan Loris and the other Precursors Ishmael was in contact with didn’t do much to raise Ishmael’s opinion of the beta phocids, as evidenced by the transcript above. Perhaps if they’d thought to assuage his fears by treating the beta phocids as people worthy of dignity and understanding, he might not have feared becoming like them.

The beta phocids, for their part, were born in a similar manner to Ishmael – the same deep dream, the same delayed birth, though their bodies were ten years old by the time they emerged from their dream and took their first breaths. Ishmael had been subject to numerous digestive trials measuring the suitability of his body for life on Siren. It was found that he was somewhat lacking in the production of a digestive chemical called an enzyme which would have allowed him to better deal with the high concentrations of silica present in Siren organisms.

He could eat and digest local plants and animals, but sometimes showed signs of digestive upset. Taking this information, Dan Loris was able to tweak his beta phocids before they were born, cloning and increasing the number of cells in their bodies which could produce the appropriate enzyme. He also took samples of Ishmael’s gut microbiome, which had taken years to properly develop, and implanted those samples within the digestive tracts of the beta phocids.

They were born as a group, though not all at once, allowing for correct monitoring of the newborns during the most tenuous periods. One suffered from the most common cause of death due to delayed birth; they simply never woke up, having rejected the dream at some point over the past several years. They were removed from the amniotic chamber where they passed on, a ten year stillbirth. We might remember the legacy of ‘Ishmael’, our Ishmael who was first born on Siren, but I feel it is only right to remember ‘Charity’, the first Sirenian to die here. They were given then to the assistants of Dan Loris who performed a post mortem examination.

The others suffered no more from the effects of delayed birth than Ishmael himself did. Although their bodies were more divergent from Precursor Humans than Ishmael’s was, at the time of his birth, and the discrepancies between their dream selves and their true selves must have been more jarring, this was offset somewhat by the communal nature of their upbringing. As soon as one was deemed fully awake, aware, and of sufficient health, they were placed in the boarding chamber with the other phocids and an assigned nursery worker. The birthing process took the better part of a year, so that the last born of the delayed-birth phocids was one year ‘younger’ than the rest, despite all technically being the same age.

Cherta, who gave their name to the wandering moon, was the fifth born beta phocid. There is very little to distinguish Cherta from the rest of the group, at this early stage, but I have on file their original description - “‘Cherta’, named for a sponsor of the project who donated three million nua*. Unisex ‘phocid’ of the Beta generation. Born age 10 years and 5 months, in [Year 3]. Melanistic colouring was chosen as protection against solar radiation, but it is expressed in heterogenous patches with a strong dorsal stripe. Length 5’1 nose to tailtip at time of birth and weight 54kg. Unusually violent birth, needed sedation.” In fact, Cherta assaulted Dan Loris’s assistants as they were born, reacting to the event as though it were an invasion of the bedroom of their dream. It was by all accounts an auspicious start compared to the others, and perhaps an indication that Cherta’s experience with the deep dream was not standard.

Cherta had fallen victim to another rare phenomenon of the incubator, referred to by Dan Loris as ‘dream rot’. This occurrence is a result of differences in the receiving brain, rather than the dream machine itself. The brain begins to understand, in some form, that what it is witnessing is not reality, and the structure of the dream begins to unravel.

At the time of Cherta’s delayed birth, the dream had been in the early stages of this process. If allowed to continue for too long, permanent damage to the psyche’s ability to judge reality is the result. Cherta would be haunted by this for the remainder of their life, but it was not severe enough to significantly alter their treatment compared to the other beta phocids.

The violence of their birth began to circulate in anecdotal form, eventually reaching the ears of Ishmael. He was curious – in fact, it was the first time he showed open curiosity about anything other than the opinion of a Human child. He asked Maris if she was going to speak to Cherta too, and she told him that she had spoken to all of the beta phocids, and had given Cherta in particular some extra guidance.

He did not take it well. The realisation that Maris’s time was not solely devoted to his needs was a source of distress, and likely another painful forced grouping with the phocids he feared. He would not participate in Maris’s sessions as he had before, and appeared afterwards to despise Cherta in a way that seemed quite targeted and personal.

Maris was forced to lie – she told Ishmael that she also spoke to the Human children, thus drawing him back under the umbrella of Humankind. In the following sessions, Ishmael revealed that he had greater knowledge of the beta phocids—and Cherta in particular—than anyone had previously guessed.

“Why do they look like that?” Ishmael asked. “They don’t stand up. They’re like animals.”

“They’re adapted to move in the water, like you,” Maris said. Her voice sounded nervous. “This means they had to have short arms and long, streamlined bodies. Like an otter. They’re very graceful in the water.” She had begun to introduce a less dismissive attitude towards the phocids, even praising them at times. Ishmael would tense every time she did.

“I don’t swim,” Ishmael said.

“Well, you’re not here to swim,” Maris said. “You have other things to teach us, so Dan didn’t wanna risk you in the pool.”

Ishmael was quiet for a long time. He rarely changed his facial expression, to the point that Maris often noted that she wondered if he heard her at all, or if his facial muscles had not developed properly.

“I saw Cherta playing with the floating ball at the bottom of the pool. In the water.” Ishmael sounded somewhat disdainful. “Like a child.”

“You’re all the same age,” Maris reminded him. “And I think you’re a child too. What’s wrong with having fun in the pool? Are you jealous?” She was fascinated by Ishmael’s sudden willingness to offer his opinion, particularly as discussion of the Human children never provoked this in him.

But Ishmael didn’t answer that one. At that point, he did not want to admit to any jealousy, and likely did not consciously recognise the feeling as such. Instead, he felt annoyance - he had to spend time in the lab doing work with Dan Loris, providing test feedback, having his organs scanned, letting himself be pawed all over by technicians who did not particularly care for him, only for what data he could provide. He did not endear himself to them, his quiet and obtuse personality proving difficult to grow fond of. But he still knew that it was work, he was producing data, and the phocids were just playing around in a pool all day, as far as he could tell. He was filled with righteous indignation at their laziness, at how easy their lives were, and wished that they knew what it was like to be him, so that they might stop looking so happy any time he peered in through the test pool windows.

I have recovered video footage of this behaviour, too. At odd hours of the day, with no real schedule, Ishmael would approach those windows. They were set in the side of the corridor outside the lab, affording an underwater view to onlookers. Access to the aboveground phocid enclosure was limited, so Ishmael only had the windows. He would walk there—painstakingly upright, though often with a hand on the wall to help support what was increasingly a difficult posture—and then sit on his tail and watch. The beta phocids spent most of their time in the water, as one might imagine. Ishmael would later learn that their lives were not as blissfully relaxing as he first thought, but it is true that they spent a lot of time playing in the pool, as teenagers will do. And he would watch them, until he heard an approaching Human, and quickly retreat.

The windows did not allow the phocids to look out. Cherta was unaware that they were the target of Ishmael’s most intense scrutiny. Despite a somewhat disturbing, moth-eaten childhood dream, Cherta was, on the surface, as lively as the rest of the phocids. They weren’t exactly easygoing, though, preferring to impress upon the others the importance of following rules, and of doing things the right way.

What Ishmael did not realise was that the phocids, as they swam together, built jigsaws and played card games underwater, were providing data too. They showed Dan Loris how their body plan could deal with the aquatic environment as easily as a Human could walk around on land. And so, when Ishmael and the phocids were fifteen, Dan Loris began to build his gamma generation of genetically engineered Humans, those who would be born on Siren without the use of a deep dream, and who could be introduced to the world outside.

Long days and nights spent in the lab occupied almost all of Dan Loris’s time, and his child Callum had nowhere to go after his classes but the lab itself. And with Ishmael and Callum once again forced into close proximity to one another, Ishmael would soon learn one of the most valuable lessons of his childhood.

*’nua’ is a form of currency

#ishmael is a dysphoria machine #setting: siren

41 notes · View notes

banamine-bananime · 2 months

Text

just listing some of my headcanons (mostly appearance/demographics) because i like listing things and i’m procrastinating hard

caboose - 18-19 in 2552. went straight from hs graduation to basic to sim training to blood gulch. he was gonna do a program where the UNSC provides a hefty scholarship for completion of an engineering degree with a few years of service upon graduation, but got enlisted instead through a combination of paperwork being confusing for bureaucratic nonsense reasons, paperwork being confusing for deliberate predatory we-need-as-many-people-for-cannon-fodder-as-possible reasons, and him being confused by any paperwork. 6'7”, ~250 lb, very muscular and not thin but not quite chubby either, very mixed but mostly latino and arabic ethnicities, thick fluffy 3A chin-length dark brown hair that's always in his eyes, round face with cute fuzzy eyebrows and aquiline nose. him and tucker (and kinda donut and perhaps sarge) are the only motherfuckers here with a stable happy childhood. uses-no-specific-label queer cis dude.

church - we know church is 5 in blood gulch lol but it think he thought he was like 23-ish/jimmy was around that age. in jimmy's body, 5'10, ~230 lb, chubby and "normal" level of muscularity for someone who has a somewhat active job but doesn't work out much, untidy thick straight black hair that's like 2" grown-out from a buzz, face passably similar to the director if you squint but not really (e.g. shorter/squarer face, eyes hazel instead of stupidly light green). epsilon projects a similar bodytype but would probably default to a young-director-ish face if he had to make one. i think he would at some point consciously change it around if he were doing a face with any regularity. bisexual and nonbinary and will probably never fully acknowledge it but she can have some pronouns as a treat (from tex or in her own internal monologue) sometimes.

tucker - 18-19 in 2552. went straight from hs graduation to basic to sim training to blood gulch. enlisted because he was a “fuck around without any motivation or particular goals in life” kind of teenage dirtbag who was like “oh hey predatory recruiters absolutely dominating every career fair in Covenant-war-era earth. i’ve heard being in the military is very sexy and exciting and makes you a chick magnet so sure sign me up”. 5’4”, ~110 lb scrawny guy in blood gulch -> ~135 still pretty skinny but more muscular later. 4C hair with a grown-out buzz from basic in blood gulch becoming locs when it's long enough. *takes you by the shoulders very seriously* repeat after me, his eyes are BROWN. and the only acceptable other option is when they’re turning gray as in a body horror way, gray as in your body becoming something uncanny to you, gray as in the horribly blinding cold light of unfathomably vast stars lightyears away from anything you’ve ever known (read lazarus left the tomb btw. treat yourself). very handsome face in a boy-next-door-looks-very-sweet-until-he-opens-his-mouth kinda way. an only child or had like one older sibling he wasn’t very close to by the time he enlisted. i think of him as a bi cis guy but i enjoy trans hcs.

kai - 20 in 2552. 5’2”, ~200 lb, fat and top-heavy hourglass and broadset. a little muscular (it’s not immediately obvious) as she was always athletic and basic training helped, but she’s made more for endurance (body by “dancing 7 hours and walking home across town drunk and sleep-deprived”) than strength. thick upper-back-length black 2C hair that she sometimes dyes streaks in or ombre (usually brown highlights but she mixes it up). broad face and nose, big adorable eyebrows, life-endingly cute eyes and smile. alternates between no-makeup all-leg-hair realness, and full femme glam for funsies with 5 sets of fake eyelashes trying to take flight (at least three of them are inevitably going to be Just Fucking Gone by some point in the party). pansexual ipsogender intersex gal (tbh the original reason i headcanoned her having mosaic turner’s is the colorblindess [x-linked recessive traits are rarely gonna show up if you have 2 X chromsomes vs having one, so i was like, “hey her retinas could be some of her XO tissues, and with mosaicism, fertility isn’t uncommon, so it doesn’t contradict her having had abortions”] and then years later i thought about it harder and was like wait she has achromatopsia and that’s autosomal. biology nerd fail moment. but anyways she’s intersex.)

tex - her body is modelled after allison aged 33 (when she died), but bigger stronger faster idealized-by-memory-and-wanting-her-to-be-invincible-to-the-point-of-looking-more-like-she’s-on-gear-and-photoshop-than-a-natural-body. 6’2”, body looks like ~220 lb of muscle and low-body-fat (but not like, cut for bodybuilding competition level of low-body-fat), but being made largely metal, she is heavier. whereas allison was like 5’9”, 170 lb, serious-crossfit-competitor kind of build but nowhere near as built as tex. face looks very similar to allison but just… weirdly airbrushed look and looks… sharper. harsher features. more intimidating. but she’s got this crooked smile that looks kinda like a smug smirk but also like she’s not laughing at you exactly, she’s just vibing with you and the inherent comedy of the absurdity of life. but when she’s Not Smiling it's the kind of expression you start backing away from expeditiously. i think of her having shoulder-length hair she wears in a ponytail but i do love short-hair tex dearly. gnc butch gay/bi (mostly attracted to women, uses both labels) cis woman who uses any pronouns.

wash - around 31? in 2552 (would put him being recruited to pfl at about 26 which feels right for being able to slide into the Goofy Innocent Rookie role but also plausibly have achieved a pretty high non-commissioned officer rank). 5’6” -155 lb, functional muscle with a build in-between lean and stocky (“otter” as a label keeps coming to mind). i don’t have a super settled facecanon but picture him as either white or mixed white and east asian. he has not changed his bleach-blonde crewcut since he was 17 and the shock of allowing himself to change it now might kill him. gay ace trans man.

carolina - 29 in 2552 (actually the youngest among the high-ranking freelancers. she would kill (jk) to protect this secret). she did the whole 4 year military academy to commissioned officer training thing and had a couple years of normal UNSC service before unfortunately getting wrapped up in her dad’s mad science pet project. 5’8”, ~150 lb, leanly muscular. i think of her having natural red hair she dyes bright red but i love a black-haired carolina too. we’ve seen her face. straight trans woman (transitioned as a preteen). i know, i wanted her to be in the wlw club, too. unfortunately every time i try shipping her with a woman she’s like “meh. thinking about my weird khaki man.” and i’m like oh. sorry about that affliction.

sarge - 62 (?) in 2552. 5’6”, ~200 lb, stocky and solidly muscular barrel-chested slight-beer-gut old dude. chinese-american. if you somehow catch him without his helmet he’s got wraparound reflective shades so good luck ever seeing his face (he’ll tell you it’s classified). another eternal crewcut guy but his is shorter than wash’s. bi and definitely a robofucker tbh. he is cis or trans depending on what’s funnier in any given circumstance.

grif - 24 in 2552. worked in honolulu a couple years after hs graduation until kai was old enough (17) he felt he could leave. did a year at university before realizing he’s smart enough to be admitted to cornell but not to get the scholarship he realistically needs to not be in crushing debt on graduation and also there’s not nearly enough regimentation to college life to prevent him from rotting in bed paralyzed by Problems. went through basic and stationed on the doomed outpost. that Whole Thing happened and he was reassigned to sim troopers. 5’8”, ~300 lb, fat and a little bit strong against his will from an involuntarily active job (he has valiantly resisted picking up cardiovascular conditioning. he works very hard on unfitness). he’s kinda cute in a “hasn’t washed his face in 5 days and his peachfuzz/stubble patches combo is very uneven but you caught him smiling for 2 seconds and oh no it was VERY charming” way. thick 2C dark-brown hair that’s a few inches long, wears it longer later. gay trans guy (because his little sister is named “younger sibling of the same gender” so like… also lmfao how unfortunate for kai that her name, which she did not choose, misgenders her big brother. like 😭 god it is very on the grif siblings brand of “hello so the circumstances we have been put in mean that my existence [kai]/how i have to leave you here to protect my own sanity [grif] is actively making your life much harder. i am ashamed of this, let us never communicate about it ever. i love you so much.”)

simmons - 23 in 2552. tried to do university several times and had to drop out for mental health reasons (a very polite way of putting “rapid spiral into absolute disaster every time”. it leaves room for giving him the benefit of the doubt that this was a proactive “ah i should take care of myself and this is not working for me :) #selfcare #therapy” decision. this is not benefit of the doubt that anyone who knows him would extend.). I go back and forth on whether to roll with the “suspiciously specific denial of being in a unit that was stranded and had to eat their dog to survive” thing or just say he was assigned straight to sim troopers. 5’11”, ~160 lb, wirey build and has to be standing at attention or else he holds himself so awkwardly. i pretty much go with the Standard Ginger Simmons Fanon Face but light brown hair also feels right and i think his hair should be very short. i really like when people draw his prosthetics very industrial/bare mechanical frame not trying to imitate biological form, just whatever’s functional. Red circle eye, hell yeah. bi and i used to firmly believe “this guy has to be cis because there is NO WAY he would have the hutzpah and willingness to put self-authenticity over doing what he’s Supposed To Do. we’ve seen how he deals with anxiety. he would just be white-knuckling his way through dysphoria to this day” HOWEVER i have really come around to trans simmons

donut - 19-20 in 2552. i see him taking a gap year or two to work on the farm and think about what he wants to do with his life (not productively introspecting on his deeper desires in life and what would allow him to fulfill them, god no, of course not. daydreaming unrealistically. obviously.) before enlisting. i think his upbringing was fairly happy but kinda weird and a bit insular within a small community of some Beliefs and possibly homeschooled. not like exactly Fundie Christian America as you might assume with that background; american subcultures have changed enough over 500 years that this is one of many totally unrecognizable to us. like it has some roots in Fundie Christianity and homesteading-from-a-weird-reactionary-tradfamily-can’t-trust-the-gubernment-place and some in Hippie-dippiness Spirituality, not-actually-a-cult-but-sometimes-you’ll-hear-him-say-things-he-thinks-are-normal-and-you’re-like-ummmmmmmm. (Idek how that headcanon started. i think i was just like so how DO you build a guy like donut). he’s 5’10”, ~185 lb, sturdy build, i don’t think people would consider him chubby but definitely not thin. his face and hair looks like he should be on a 1960s white america boyscouts poster but like, goofy about it. i think of him being mostly white but some latino heritage he’s curious about but was not raised connected to (hence wanting to learn spanish). acearospec and gay (he’s like…. mostly asexual and aromantic but it’s complicated. he is barely aware of being gay let alone ace or aro. he just fully makes up what he thinks sexual attraction and romance are and assigns it to random feelings/experiences). cis dude or nonbinary.

#alexa send post #rvb #rvb headcanons

28 notes · View notes

queerpossumtrenchcoat · 21 days

Text

Let's talk gender expression, awful haircuts and realisation of who I am! I came out as gender fluid approximately around the age of the third picture above- and I got an awful haircut to match it, but at the time I felt like THE gender vibe; I was 13, or so, and didn't realise I looked like I'd had a fistfight with a weed whacker. It was a stepping stone however, for me to discover who I was; after this time I started to experiment with my look, name and pronouns, leaning more towards he/they and slowly changing my name from Jaimee to Jai and or James- small steps, I know, but crucial ones in me realising my dead name no longer really fit me as a person. James was a family name after all. Finding myself wasn't always glamorous, the look wasn't always particularly handsome or pretty, it was colour the tips of my hair with sharpie markers and conditioner until my hair had a distinctly petrol-and-macadamia type stench or cutting it with a cheap, disposable razor which ended up giving me hair reminiscent of the early 2000s emo scene (which I totally was, even if I only saw 6 years of the 'early 2000s!'). I would hack off chunks, flatten my chest with cheap Duct Tape and wear boxers I stole from my dad in order to feel some semblance of who I was, using makeup to poorly build cheek bones and eyebrows so I could look like my hero at the time, Brendon Urie (God, that aged poorly..) In time I got creative, I learned that my parents wouldn't let me get a 'real boy's haircut' so I'd have to improvise; here came the next 6 months of beanie hats and ponytails pulled over to create a 'boy fringe' which, in retrospect, was giving more Justin Beiber than Emo Quartet, but that all chained when I turned 16 and... Got to dye my hair for the first time!! It was the greatest experience for my gender to date!! My mother bought me midnight blue hairdye for my 16th birthday and helped me dye it; I looked in the mirror at my fairly short ish, dark blue hair and I saw it. I saw him, stood staring back at me with tears in his eyes. I saw ME. I told my girlfriend, at the time anyway, straight away and she accepted me with open arms- I think she was expecting the genderfluid-to-trans masc timeline, which funnily enough he followed in 2022 during lockdown. Lockdown dug its claws into my gender and expression quite deeply; while at home with my mother, father and two very young siblings I came to experiment with my gender a lot more, dressing in more masculine clothes and cutting my hair off for 'sake of ease', or that's what I told my parents anyway- they believed it too, surprisingly. I went through college having to somewhat pretend I was just a feminine man, I was exhausted and on the brink of suicide, as most people my age at the time were, and went by Eden because it seemed more palatable to the others around me- didnt stop me being picked on, but it wasn't by students... It was my own teacher! Shout out to Miss Dunsby! Then I dropped out of college. I picked up a shitty little cafe job as a barista and linecook, cooking meals, making coffees, pretending I gave half a shit about a joke I'd heard over and over again; I dyed my hair neon green and used my pay checks to get it cut SHORT short for the first time- I looked hella fine, in my opinion, but I was also starting to realise something.. Maybe I had been right the first time, because I didn't feel like a man all the time. Back to the drawing board... One shaved head and a job at a gay bar later, I started using the art of drag, performing as a female persona, to realise that I was Masc-Agender, like a boyish presenting genderless person. Easy enough, I suppose. I started wearing makeup, being myself and wearing whatever I damn pleased, uncaring of social cues and rules, I was me. I was happy. I AM happy. If there is anything you can take away from this, once you find the part of yourself you can express your feelings, thoughts and emotions with, go wild!! I did and it made realising my truth so much easier!

25 notes · View notes

writingamongther0ses · 4 months

Text

So, new WIP idea, based off the Odyssey. No clue of the plot yet but it involves trans Telemachus and this scene.

Creak.

Thwack.

All heads turned in time to see the arrow pass through the last axe handle and embed into the wall.

Odysseus turned his head in time to see Telemachus lower his grand bow. Penelope's green eyes, the same shade as Neriton's beautiful green forest, were narrowed in his son's face. He lowered the bow and turned those green eyes onto the crowd of suitors.

"Here. Proof it can be done." the young man said. "By a man barely old enough to hold a sword, no less." Telemachus's nose scrunched up in distaste. "What's your excuse?"

"I-"

He unstrung the bow and handed the string to a nearby servant, revealing how it was slick with red. "We're going to need the spare string," he said, even as he gripped his hand in a tight fist. "Antionus."

One of the suitors, a massive burly guy, looked up. "What?"

Telemachus spread his hand. The man winced back as a drop of blood rolled off his palm. Odysseus couldn't help but feel pride welling up like the blood staining his son's hand.

"There's the blood you wanted."

#my writing #greek myth #greek mythology #short story #fiction #microfiction

40 notes · View notes

cryptidclaw · 7 months

Text

Star Firesight!

Design Notes:

Fire is now a Scottish fold!... or rather a descendant of Scottish folds since i doubt pure bred cats still exist post apocalypse.

He also has some very small black calico spotting, just two litol spots I think its cute :3

Since he is an ex healer he still wears some flowers like a healer would in memory of his old role.

Character Bio:

Star Firesight

(Fireheart/star)

Bisexual & Polyamorous; Trans Tom; he/him

Age as of 1st arc's beginning: 7 moons; 11 Hyrs

Age as of 1st arc's end: 2 cycles, 5 moons; ~26 Hyrs

Title meaning: -sight = this cat can spot things that others cannot; a cat with a close connection to the Stars; this healer receives many signs from the Stars; the healer may also be very good at spotting illnesses or injuries.

Healer -> Second -> Leader of Thunder Order

Mentor: Redtail (died) -> Spottedleaf

Mother: Nutmeg

Father: Jake

Sibling: Sapheart (Princess)

Half Siblings: Socks; Ruby: Tinyclaw

Mates: Sandstorm; Shriketail

Kits: Squirrelflight (sire: Sand); Leafpool (sire: Shrike); Foxleap (sire: Sand); Icecloud (sire: Shrike)

Grandkits: Star Hollyleaf; Falconstrike; Jaywing; Alderheart; Sparkfire

Other notable kin: Cloudtail (nephew); Snowshoe (nephew); Mistletoe (niece); Spiderleg (nephew); Shrew (nephew)

Notes:

Firesight has chronic pain (and mobility issues later in life):

Fire has the Scottish Fold breed's mutation which effects cartilage in the body, this causes his ears to fold, but it also causes chronic joint pain and can progress into swollen and inflexible joints.

For Fire, he is has the heterozygous version of this mutation, which means that his disability progresses more slowly, as a young cat he does experience some joint pain, with some days being worse than others. He is able to medicate with his own chronic pain herbal mix he created as a Healer. However as Fire grows older his joints will worsen, and by the time of his old age he will be unable to jump and some days is unable to walk.

He is able to still use his medication to aid him and is able to lead a happy life, but he is disabled and I didnt want to leave that out of his character! It's important to have disability rep (and spread awareness of the issues with the Scottish Fold breed) and I hope I serve him justice!

Character Summary:

In Progress (to be added later)

...

[Image ID: a digital drawing of Star Firesight, an AU version of Firestar from Warrior Cats. He is standing with his left side showing and has a proud and happy expression with a smile. He is a short, chubby and round shapped bright orange tom with small folded ears and green eyes. His fur's coloring is layered in a fire like pattern from orange to a lighter orangey yellow. His right ear is black and he also has a small black spot above his nose. He has a white lower chest, muzzle, toe tips and tail tip, and his nose is pink. He wears pink flower petals and green leaves in his pelt and a simple crown rests on his forehead bade up of a diamond shaped red stone and a small teardrop shaped white stone below it./End ID]

#cryptidclaw's warriors au #rise of change #firestar #star firesight #med cat fireheart au #fireheart #firestar design #warrior cats #warrior cats design

523 notes · View notes

whumpy-wyrms · 9 months

Text

The Last Lab Rat #1: Only The Beginning

masterlist | next

content: lab whump, kidnapping, begging, needles, drugging, manhandling, restraints, captivity, trans whumpee, defiant whumpee, intimate whumper

—

Anton decided five years was more than enough time waiting. His experiments were getting more and more dangerous to be practiced on himself, he needed a human test subject.

He began searching right away, despite the little voice in the back of his mind telling him it was a bad idea. Remember what happened last time?

He ignored that voice. Guilt? Morality? Whatever it was, his experiments were more important.

But he was never much of a people person, and now he had to go out and find the perfect poor soul that would have to endure an indefinite amount of gruesome scientific experimentations. He needed someone young and healthy, but still strong and able to take care of themselves for the most part.

And someone who would definitely not be missed if they were to disappear for a while.

After a few weeks of looking, he found someone. He never caught the guy’s name, but he would have to do. Anton spent his nights watching the man— who he assumed to be in his early 20s— from a distance. He worked a dead-end minimum wage job and was living in a small apartment with at least two other roommates. The guy didn’t go out much, and seemed to have little to no friends or family. He was a complete nobody. He was perfect.

It wouldn’t matter if people came looking for him anyway, Anton had a plan. He was a mad scientist, after all. He had a few tricks up his sleeves.

Anton spent the next few days planning out how to kidnap his new soon-to-be test subject without being caught. It turned out it was easier than he thought. All he had to do was wait, really, until it was the guy’s turn to take out the trash.

. . .

It was the dead of night, and Dew had his headphones on, so he couldn’t hear the stranger’s footsteps coming from behind him. Once the trash bag was in the dumpster and Dew turned around to go back inside, he suddenly felt a strong hand grab his wrist and pull him into an alleyway.

Before he had time to react, Dew’s scream was muffled by a hand clamping over his mouth and pulling him against the man’s chest. Dew struggled and kicked out as he watched his attacker grab something from his pocket.

It was a syringe.

Dew shrieked and bit down on the hand holding his mouth closed. The man hissed in surprised and loosed his grip enough for Dew to take a few steps away, only to be stopped by a hand around his ankle. Dew fell forward onto the hard concrete, kicking and screaming for help.

The man tightened his grip on Dew’s ankle and dragged his body towards him, the syringe in his other hand.

Dew kicked out, tears now freely flowing down his cheeks and his arms flailing for anything to grab on to. After he got close enough and the man started to lower the syringe— which was filled with a bright green liquid— towards him, Dew finally found his voice.

“W-wait!” Dew let out a petrified squeak, staring with wide eyes at the stranger looming over him. “P-please no, n-not that!” His breath hitched in his throat when the man made no effort to stop moving.

Anton tilted his head. He stopped himself from hesitating, he needed to do this. He thought this would go a lot more smoothly, for some reason. His new test subject was making way too much noise.

“Sorry,” Anton said, expression unreadable. “It’s nothing personal.” With that, he lunged forward and stuck the needle through his sobbing test subject’s neck, injecting the contents of it into his bloodstream. He covered Dew’s mouth before he could scream in pain.

When the syringe was empty, Anton quickly moved to the side and rummaged through some things in the corner that Dew hadn’t noticed before. Anton wasn’t worried about his new test subject running away right then; he would soon be far too weak for that.

Dew lied still on the ground, clutching his neck in terror. What did he inject him with? What was it going to do to him? His thoughts were racing as his body slowly started to give up on him. He tried crawling away from the man, but he felt himself just becoming weaker as he succumbed to the drugs.

Anton paid no mind to the blabbering mess that was next to him. He grabbed the rope and duct tape and began restraining his new test subject. It was a long ride home, after all.

Dew whimpered in protest as duct tape was covered over his mouth, but his body just felt too tired and weak to stop it. He didn’t have the strength to struggle anymore as rope was tied around his wrists and ankles, and a blindfold was gently placed over his eyes. Though, that didn’t make too much of a difference; his eyes were already drooping closed anyway.

The last thing Dew heard before being shoved into the trunk of a car and engulfed in more darkness, was a quiet “I’m sorry,” from the man. Then, he drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

. . .

Anton was a nervous wreck on the drive home. He had never done anything like that before. Sure, he’d had his fair share of experimenting on unwilling human test subjects in the past, but not downright kidnapping an innocent person. He was mainly worried about anyone hearing or seeing them, though. He knew he’d have to get his own test subject eventually, and he was prepared for that.

He calmed down once he got to the lab. It was a long 4 and a half hour drive, and now it was around two in the morning; he was tired. He had to make sure he looked for a new test subject far away so nobody that came looking would find them all the way out here, in the middle of nowhere.

Anton parked the car and walked to the trunk. His new test subject was still fast asleep, and probably would be for some time. He gently moved his arms beneath the man’s legs and back, lifting him in a bridal carry. His test subject’s head lolled to the side against Anton’s shoulder. He looked cute sleeping like that.

Anton entered his cabin in the middle of the dense forest, descended the stairs, and arrived in his lab.

The scientist walked through his laboratory and up a small staircase to a little room in the side of the wall that overlooked the lab. He unlocked the door, and stepped inside.

Anton had prepared for this moment for a long time. He knew he’d need a human test subject eventually, and he knew he wouldn’t make the same mistake his predecessor made last time. This person was a human, and he was going to be treated like one.

Anton had transformed that small viewing room into a bedroom, adding a bathroom in the back as well. Sure, it didn’t give much privacy for his test subject since an entire wall was glass, but Anton decided that just meant he could observe his subject in his natural habitat, so it worked out okay.

He knew deep down he should feel bad. This was an innocent human being he was stealing from their life, after all. But this was also his entire life’s work here, and the scientists’ that came before him. What would his mentor think, if he gave up everything for one measly little stranger’s life?

Besides, he’s a scientist, not a sadist. He’d make his test subject feel as comfortable as he possibly could, that’s the least he could do, after all, he didn’t deserve any of this. He gave his subject his own room, a small way to make him feel some sense of control he didn’t have.

Anton gently set his test subject down on the bed and began untying him, removing the duct tape and blindfold in the process. Once he was done, he attached a chain to his ankle and tied him to one of the legs of the bed. It was long enough for him to move around the room and into the bathroom, but not far out the exit door.

Anton swiftly checked his subject’s pockets only to find an old looking MP3 player that was connected to his headphones. Right. He was still wearing those. Anton carefully removed his subject’s headphones and MP3 player and put them to the side. He probably won’t need those anymore, but might use them as a reward for good behavior, so they were worth keeping.

Otherwise, nothing else was in his pockets. No phone or wallet, so he couldn’t even find out what the man’s name was. Oh well, he’d have to ask him when he wakes up.

Anton took off his subject’s shoes— he wouldn’t be needing those anymore, it wasn’t like he’d be spending a lot of time outdoors— plus, they’re uncomfortable to sleep in. His glasses, too, were gently removed and placed on the nightstand next to a folded up hospital gown.

Anton tucked the smaller man under the covers; he wouldn’t want his test subject getting cold the first night, would he? As the other slept peacefully and oblivious, Anton took one last glance at him before heading to the door. It’d still be a few more hours until he would wake up, which would be much later into the night by then. Anton had made sure the camera above the door had a movement sensor, just for tonight, so he’d be notified the second his new test subject had woken up.

As Anton opened the door to leave, he hesitated, taking one last look back. His test subject was wearing a hoodie with strings. Can’t have that. Anton swiftly removed the strings, trying to ignore his guilty conscience of past experiences, and left his subject alone to sleep.

. . .

Dew opened his eyes, tired and groggy, but he wasn’t in his room. His head was throbbing, and it took him a couple of blinks to even get used to the blinding light coming from… somewhere. Not like that mattered since his vision was blurry anyway. Where were his glasses? His ears were ringing too. The faint buzzing from the lights didn’t help.

He tried to sit up, but realized his entire body hurt. Dew ignored the pain and moved his arms to his side to push himself upright anyway, but after just a couple of seconds, he fell back into the mattress, exhausted. His arms were weak, actually, his whole body was weak. He could hardly move.

Dew opened his mouth to call out– not even for help at first– just for anyone, for anything. But his voice was sore and raspy. He didn’t have the strength to speak. His mind was groggy as he wished for someone to just tell him what was going on. The more he tried to remember why he was like this, his headache only grew more painful.

Dew decided the only choice he had at this point was to go back to sleep. Wherever he was, whoever brought him here, he knew he would find out sooner or later. He was too tired to notice the restraint around his ankle keeping him chained to the bed, as he drifted off into another dreamless sleep.

. . .

After a few hours, Dew gasped awake, jolting upright despite his struggles earlier. He was surprised he didn’t hit his head on the ceiling, but then realized he wasn’t in his bunk bed anymore. He remembered where he was, and panic started to sink in.

He could hardly see— where are his glasses? Dew frantically looked around until his eyes landed on his glasses on the nightstand to the left of the bed. He snatched his glasses up and put them on.

Dew quickly looked around the strange room, panic starting to creep its way into his head. The room was small, and there was almost nothing in it. Straight ahead on the opposite wall was a steel door that seemed to be the exit. The bed was located in the middle of the room against the wall, and it was the nicest bed Dew had slept in in years. The wall to his right was entirely glass; a window looking out to what seemed to be a mad scientist’s lab below. Huh. He decided to ignore that for now. To his left was a normal wall with another door, though it was smaller than the other one and partially open.

Above the exit was a camera. Dew scrambled out of bed to take a look and suddenly felt a tug on his ankle. He looked down to see a long chain attached to one of the legs of the bed. Great. His panic was beginning to skyrocket.

Why was he here? How did he get here? Who put him here? His mind raced with questions and confusion, but he knew he had to stay focused. This was probably just a dream anyway; he had lots of weird ones.

After peeking into the other doorway which turned out to just be a small bathroom, all of his attention was focused on the camera. Someone was watching. Whoever it was, whether it was the person who put him in here or not, he would get their attention.

He stood as tall as he could, with a stoic expression. He needed to look strong and determined, he couldn’t let whatever freaks put him here see that he was absolutely terrified and defenseless.

After staring the camera down for what felt like either a couple seconds or 20 minutes, Dew heard footsteps coming towards the door, seeming to be walking up stairs. That’s right, his… cell was overlooking a fucking futuristic mad science lab just like the ones in movies. How could he have forgotten?

Dew stood his ground. He couldn’t think about that right now, there was someone on the other side of the door. One by one, he heard the locks on the door clicking. Dew stood his ground. He saw the door knob slowly spin. His heartbeat quickened, he couldn’t hide his fear. Fuck this!

Dew frantically leaped under the bed, covering his mouth with his trembling hand, trying to be as quiet as possible. The door slowly opened, making a loud creaking sound. Whoever was there was being eerily quiet.

From under the bed, Dew watched the person walk into the room, and then shut the door behind them. And lock it. They turned back around with a confused hum and walked slowly towards the bed. Every footstep rang in his ears and the closer they got, the more Dew wished he thought of a different plan that wasn’t hiding under the bed like a scared child.

He knew there was no point hiding under the bed, this person could just look to see where the chain led, not like there was anywhere else for Dew to have gone. This was futile, Dew knew he was just delaying the inevitable. Whatever this person wanted with him, it couldn’t be good. Once the footsteps came to a stop, Dew realized he was crying. All the events from last night came flooding back.

“Hey,” A voice rang. Dew knew that voice. His hand slowly reached up to his neck to feel the injection sight. It was real. This was real. “You awake? What are you doing down there?”

Dew felt like he was prey being taunted by a predator, like some sick game. He remembered last night now, remembered the struggle and fear and terror and—

Dew couldn’t stifle a small sob. He wanted to go home. He didn’t know why he was here, or where here even was. He didn’t know what this guy wanted with him, or what would happen to him. It was too overwhelming, Dew couldn’t take it.

The man crouched down next to the bed and looked underneath. Dew couldn’t stop sobbing as he curled up into himself. He just wanted to be left alone, he wished he could turn invisible or disappear from reality, so he wouldn’t have to be scared anymore. He felt the man’s eyes on him, but he didn’t move.

. . .

Whatever Anton expected when his test subject woke up, it wasn’t this. The poor thing wouldn’t even crawl out from under the bed, much less look at him. Anton didn’t know what to do, the guy was obviously in distress.

Anton couldn’t exactly… force the guy out from under the bed. He wanted to gain his trust, for what it was worth. He didn’t want to sedate him either, they needed to have an actual conversation about what his new test subject’s life will be like now. Anton needed to get him to come out on his own. Hell, he didn’t even know his name. Maybe that was a good place to start.

“What’s your name?” Anton asked.

“…W-What?” His test subject looked up at him, confused. He furrowed his brows and murmured, “Dew… My name’s Dew.”

“Alright,” Anton couldn’t stand those eyes staring at him now, wide and sad and confused, as if Dew was pleading him for answers, for anything. “I’m Anton.”

Dew glared at him. He was getting nowhere.

“Dew, are you hungry?” Anton asked. That made Dew’s ears perk up. He thought for a moment, it’d been a while since he’d last eaten. He didn’t know how long he’d been sleeping in this room for, but he felt his stomach growl at the thought of food.

Dew took a deep breath and tried to stop crying. If he wanted to get out of this, he had to be smart. He had to be strong. He shakily nodded his head and moved out from under the bed.

To Anton’s disappointment, Dew moved to the opposite side of the room, away from him. He curled up in the corner next to the window that looked out to the lab. Yeah, Anton would have to explain that soon, huh.

Anton stood, grabbed something off the nightstand, and walked over to Dew. He towered over him as Dew looked up in fear.

“Alright,” Anton started, gesturing to the hospital gown in his hands. “So, I’ll go get you some food, and while I’m gone, I want you to put this on.” He set it down on the bed and began to head towards the door to give Dew some space.

Dew took one glance at the hospital gown and found his voice again.

“W-wait—” Anton paused at the door, looking back curiously. “I don’t— why am I here? What do you want with me?” Dew asked timidly.

“Oh,” Anton began. “I guess I should tell you now then? You’re my new test subject, to put it simply. I’m a scientist and I needed a human to start doing my experiments on. Understand?”

Dew’s stomach turned. He felt like he was going to be sick. No, he most definitely did not understand. Was he just expected to accept this like it was nothing? Like this guy didn’t just kidnap him and take him away from his life? From his friends? Dew stared in disbelief. No, this couldn’t be real. This was a dream. This only happens in weird futuristic sci-fi movies. Not real life.

Dew shook his head rapidly, he felt his heart going a million beats a minute and he needed to get out of here.

“I’ll uh, give you some time to process?” Anton could see Dew’s panic, which was obviously getting worse by the minute. Maybe sedatives were the good choice here?

“I’m not wearing that,” Dew said. He reminded himself he needed to stay strong, no matter what his gut tells him. He needed to focus on one thing at a time. He’d get out of here soon.

“Why not?”

“I…” Dew realized he was still wearing his binder. It had been on all night. He guessed Anton didn’t notice. If the scientist didn’t even know Dew’s name, how was he supposed to know he was transgender? Did Anton really know nothing about his new so-called “test subject’s” life? How was Dew supposed to adjust to all this change and have to come out to this freak who kidnapped him and called himself a scientist, who could so easily do anything he wanted with him if he chose to?

“I-I wanna go home,” Dew said, tears forming in his eyes again. He didn’t know what help that would do, but it was worth a shot.

Anton walked over to him, and Dew stood. He realized just how much bigger Anton was than him. He easily towered at least a foot over Dew, who was a measly 5’3. Great. Dew cursed himself for being so small for someone in his early 20s. He didn’t stand a chance against his captor.

“Dew,” Anton put his hands on Dew’s shoulders. “You’re my test subject now. I know, that’s probably hard to accept, and I’ll give you all the time to adjust that you need, okay? I’ll get you food, just put that on and you can ask me whatever questions you need to.”

“Why are you doing this?” He choked out, refusing to make eye contact.

“I need a test subject, like I said. I couldn’t keep experimenting on myself, it was getting too dangerous.” Great. So Dew would be expecting a whole world of excruciating pain and agony soon then, huh. “You’re young and healthy, and you have your whole life ahead of you— which will hopefully be spent here, if all goes well.” Anton gave Dew a few light pats to his cheek and when Dew didn’t say anything more, he left the room.

Dew turned his gaze out the giant window and watched numbly as Anton walked down the stairs and across the lab to a small kitchen area and began heating up some ramen. Dew ignored that dreaded hospital gown and began to look around the lab a bit more, since it was literally his only view.

It was a huge place, with lots of science-y looking things scattered about. There was no other way to describe it really, this place looked exactly like you’d expect a futuristic sci-fi mad scientist’s lab to look like.

There were various large vats of chemicals, most of which were empty. Weird looking plants— which seemed like they were definitely not from Earth— were scattered around the lab, some behind glass barriers. There were giant white boards filled with scientific equations Dew couldn’t understand, as well as a bunch of huge computer monitors towards the back of the room. There were shelves with stacks of brains in jars, various strange looking weapons, and vials with glowing liquids. About a dozen empty cages sat in a corner of the room, all of different sizes. There were papers scattered around a desk, with even more papers stacked on top of it. In the middle of the room was an operating table with different types of restraints, and next to it was a tray filled with dissection tools.

Dew was terrified, as he’d been all morning. Or… night? What time was it? Dew realized he couldn’t see any clocks in there, at least ones he could read. There were a few down by Anton’s science stuff, but they were all 24-hour clocks. Dew cursed himself for never bothering to learn those.

After he was done looking over the room that would probably cause Dew some very bad nightmares in the future, he wandered over to the bathroom. Before he went in, he felt a slight tug on his ankle. Right. He was still chained to one of the bed legs.

He untangled it from under the bed and went to the bathroom. He wasn’t putting on that hospital gown, his clothes were fine. Though, he noticed his shoes and hoodie strings were gone for some reason. Also his headphones and MP3 player. Shit. He’d have to get those back somehow. He didn’t know how he’d survive here for more than a day without his comfort music.

Once Dew was done in the bathroom, he curled up in a corner again, the one by his nightstand, far from the window. After a few more minutes, he heard footsteps coming up the stairs again to the room.

Dew hoped this guy wouldn’t be too mad that he didn’t do what he said, but he was not letting him take his clothes away. Dysphoria was the least thing he needed right now, and he was not about to come out to his kidnapper.

Anton opened the door to Dew’s room to see his test subject huddled up in a different corner, wearing his same clothes. Anton sighed disappointedly, knowing he’d soon have to teach Dew it’s not alright to disobey him.

“Look, if I give you food, will you change your clothes?” Anton asked.

“What time is it?” Dew asked, voice shaking once again. He eyed the glass of water in Anton’s hands, he realized he was incredibly thirsty.

Anton checked his watch, “Around 4:00 AM,” he said. When Dew didn’t respond, Anton crouched down to his level and put the bowl of ramen in his hands. Dew stared blankly at the food when a terrifying thought occurred in his mind. His wide eyes looked up in fear at the scientist, who realized what Dew was thinking.

“I didn’t poison your food,” Anton sighed again. “Look,” He carefully took a spoonful of the ramen and ate it, showing Dew it was safe to eat. Dew hesitantly dug in, though he despised the texture.

After he was done eating, Dew eyed the water. Anton took a small sip before giving it to him, showing it wasn’t drugged. His test subject gulped it down in seconds. Dew stared warily at Anton after that, wondering what his captor was gonna do next.

Anton glanced at the hospital gown, and Dew frantically shook his head. “I’m not wearing that!” He said. Anton sighed.

“Alright, you can stay in your clothes just for today.” Anton said. “But you’ll have to change into that eventually, it’ll make everything much easier for me.” Dew glared at him.

“Anyway, I need to get a DNA sample,” Dew watched as Anton reached a hand into his pocket and pulled out a syringe. His breath hitched and eyes widened in terror. “I’m gonna need to draw some blood now, okay?”

NO. No this was not okay. Dew frantically shook his head and looked around the room for an escape, but he was completely cornered. “N-no!” Dew’s voice cracked in fear and he couldn’t stop his tears. “No no no no, please—” He cowered deeper into the corner, making himself even smaller. He once again wished he could just disappear.

“What’s wrong?” Anton tilted his head in confusion. Surely his test subject had had his blood drawn before, so what was the problem? “I won’t take that much, I just need a small sample to see—”

“NO!” Dew cried. Great, a panic attack, just what he needed. “Y-you— you d-don’t understand!”

Dew had always had a terrible phobia of needles. He always cursed himself for never getting over that fear, especially since he had to give himself T-shots every week. Oh. That was another thing he’d have to figure out while trapped here.

Anton noticed Dew’s obvious distress, and put the needle down. He wasn’t sure what to do, this was going terribly.

“Dew,” Anton said as he put his hands firmly on his shoulders. “Breathe. Come on, take a deep breath, that’s it.” Anton had never been good at comforting people like this, but he supposed he had to get used to it if he was going to be the one responsible for taking care of his test subject.

“I…” Dew squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath. He thought about things he loved: music, comic books, that video game he’d been playing recently, and that cartoon character he was currently hyperfixated on. Once he was, for the most part, calmed down, he started speaking again. “I- if you need blood, why couldn’t you’ve just taken it while I was asleep, w-why’d you have to wait until- until—”

“Dew,” Anton squeezed his hands on Dew’s shoulders. “Relax. Tell me what’s wrong.”

“I… I-I’m scared of needles.” Dew choked out. Now this weirdo knew his weakness.

“Hm,” Anton murmured. “That’s a problem.” He needed his test subject to trust him, it would only make things easier in the long run. But that obviously wasn’t going to happen anytime soon, so Anton had to try a different approach.

“Dew, if you don’t comply, I’m going to have to force you.” Dew whimpered as Anton picked up the needle again, and took Dew’s left arm in his other hand.

“W-wait,” Dew squeaked, struggling against Anton’s grip. “P-please no, I-I don’t-”

“You don’t want to be sedated again, do you?”

“N-no! No, but- please—”

“Dew, I’m gonna draw some blood, and then I’ll leave you alone for the time being, does that sound good?” Being left alone did sound like what Dew needed right now. He couldn’t stand the thought of being around this creep any longer.

Dew whimpered and nodded his head in defeat. He really was in no position to argue with this maniac. He had no idea who he was or what he was capable of, and he really didn’t want to find out what would happen if he kept disobeying. He’d do what he says for now, and figure out a way out of this place soon.

Anton slowly pushed the needle towards Dew’s elbow, who was now shaking and trying to hold back tears. Dew whimpered when he felt the pinch. It never hurt really, he knew this fear was irrational, but he couldn’t help it. He just wanted this to be over and done with so he could be alone.

After Anton got his blood sample, he silently stood up and walked towards the door, taking one last look back at his test subject, who was still curled up in the corner, staring with wide, teary eyes at the scientist.

Anton would have to work on gaining the little guy’s trust later.

. . .

Dew didn’t do much else that day. After Anton had left him, Dew was happy to be alone, wishing he could just curl up with his cat and listen to music, but that wasn’t possible at the moment.

After a while of just huddling in the corner, Dew peaked his head over his bed and out the window. Anton seemed to be doing something with that blood sample. Dew wasn’t sure if he wanted to know what.

He took a breath as he stood, scared that Anton would notice him get up and confront him, but that didn’t happen. Dew slowly took the blankets off the bed and huddled up underneath it again. He always liked being in small, dark spaces, and those bright lights were giving him a headache.

Dew didn’t want to fall asleep, but he didn’t really have much else to do. It wasn’t like he could sleep anyway, with his mind racing with thoughts of needles and pain and mad scientists. He didn’t want to think about what being a “test subject” even entailed, but he was sure he wouldn’t like it. He was a human! He didn’t want to be experimented on like some lab rat!

Dew hugged his blanket and closed his eyes, wishing he was anywhere else.

—

first chapter done!!! this is my first time posting my writing to tumblr (or literally anywhere else), and my first time writing about whump in general so i hope people will like it!! I’m really excited to continue this, i have lots of plans for my blorbos 😈😈

taglist: @whumpinthepot @shywhumpauthor @whump-me-all-night-long

let me know if you wanted to be added to the tag list!

108 notes · View notes

silent-raven13 · 8 months

Text

Bitches and Bros, Trans Thotties and None Binary Hoes! 🎸

Hobie shouted out loud, "Aye, Bitches and Bros, Trans Thotties and None Binary Hoes! We Spider-Slayers!" He did the horned sign with his hands before the crowd cheer for his band as the concert starts, every punker in London came to see him and his band. Pure Chaos, mash pits and loud screaming and shouting adoring him.

The loud burst of energy from the audience brought much pleasure, and aggressive joy. The crowd wanted more and more as the music roars into the city of London. Hobie sticks the middle finger at a photographer, then jumps into the crowd as they carried him around while he did his guitar solo.

After the concert, Hobie sat with a couple of women sitting against, their hands on his chest as they giggles at his jokes. He would flirt, putting his English charm making them blush, and flirtatious. Yes, this is the life of a famous punk band. "So I said no you dimwit, that's not a fucking spliff, that's Nettle tea leaves. Fucking wanker smoked tea." His low chuckle had this dark allure to it.

The two women giggles along the story. "Oh Hobie, you're such a funny bloke. Have you ever thought of being a comedian instead?" A female punker with pixie dye green tips hair, pierced nose ring and black lipstick asked.

"Me a comedian? Now, that's funny." Hobie chuckles, as the two laughs with amusement. They flirted, kissed with him, with each other. Hey, he ain't complaining, he's always willing to share and always willing to sleep with everyone and anyone. Sex is about the fun, the enjoyment. Pfft, who says it needs to be about love?

The twenty six year old pulled away from one of the girls, as his eyes open to find his drummer glaring at him. One hand on her hip, with an annoyed arched eyebrow. Hobie pulls away from one of the girl's lips just to say, "Gwendy! What's wrong, luv?"

"We need to talk about you sleeping with Pav! You know, he got a girlfriend!" She crosses her muscular fitted arms being upset, "He's our bass player! You know, Gayatri is our-" Hobie got up to calm her down, "Gwendy! Gwendy, darling! Relax, luv." He took her hand to pat, "Pav didn't tell you that I slept with him and his girlfriend!"

"You did not! Hobie that's fucking crazy." Gwen said with her blue eyes widen in shock, she pulled her hand away.

"Nothing wrong with consensual threesome, darling. Now, this anger I'm getting is uncalled for." He went back to sitting with his women.

"No, you know what you're doing is wrong. Pav is our friend! You had to play with his emotions like that- Why?" Gwen asked being extremely annoyed, this wasn't the first time he did this. "He's our bass player! It's bad enough our other guitarist left because you slept with his partner! We were lucky to get Margo!"

"Yeah. Yeah. Gwendy, luv. It's alright. Pav and Gayatri will get over it. I only helped Pav figure himself out." Hobie wave his hand away from Gwen, "Now, darling, would you be so kind and get daddy some beer?"

"Fuck you, Hobie. You're such a fucking ass sometimes! And no! I'm going to look for my friend, he finally got to see our band!" She shouted going into the crowd.

"Whatever." Hobie rolled his eyes as his drummer went into the crowd. The singer merely slept with the bass player and his girlfriend to ease their curiosity. Whatever, Pav had or thought should be forgotten, because this singer isn't about love. No love is foolish, filled with lies and rejection.

As the party went on, so did him enjoying his time with his ladies. Then at one glance his eyes caught someone wearing a bright yellow sweater with sunflowers designs, he did another take being surprised at someone's bold choice. After all this is the punk scene, everyone dressed in edgy dark clothing, yet this person wore something so bright. Granted there are certain people wearing bright clothing but this person just caught his eye.

Hobie leans forward spotting the young man; a black young man, with a densely coiled afro, he's tall, too. Not tall as him, but tall enough to be spotted in the crowd. The person wore his bright yellow sweater with some light blue washed ripped jeans, and Air Jordans 1 Retro High OG in red, black and white. The singer held his breath when the guy turns around revealing his face; a beautiful handsome face. It's like the sun kissed his cheeks causing them to glow, his eyes big a doe, and blushed plump lips look so kissable.

"Who is that?" He finally asked out loud being enchanted by this beauty, he reminds him of a Sunflower. When the young man frantically looks around, he went to his Smart phone trying to text someone. "What's this? Have he been stood up?" With a sly grin on his face, "Well, time to give the ole' Hobart Charm."

Without warning the singer got up leaving the two ladies behind him, "Hey! Where you going?" One of them asked being upset.

"Sorry, luvs. I have someone waiting for me. Maybe next time," He winks at them. He could hear them calling him an asshole for ditching them. It didn't bother him, they will come around.

The tall singer made his way through the crowd of people getting close to the mysterious Sunflower, he grabs two beers from the bar without considering who order them. Nah, Hobie takes and never pays like he needs to. As he got close to the young man, he could smell his soft cologne and mango shea butter, "Heh, cute." Hobie thought.

The young man stood, still looking head trying to spot his friend. Just then, his honey-brown eyes widen by a random beer appearing from his face, "Huh?" He glanced up following the mystery hand.

"Hello, luv. Care for a beer?" The singer from the band he saw is talking to him.

"I'm..." He awkwardly said, "Well-you see- um, Sure!" He gladly took the beer from the singer's hand, "Thanks. Your, Hobie, right?"

"Yes, it looks like my name precedes me." He grins widely showing off his charm.

The man with the doe eyes gleam by the singer's handsome small, in person he's a lot more cooler. He held the beer bottle in his hands, "You and your band were amazing!" His face turns brighter as he smiles wider.

Hobie stood looking at the fan's face, "Cute." He lick his top lip trying hard not to get flustered by this beautiful angel. "Thanks, darling." He leans over to closely use his charms on the stranger, the young male blushes so red that his cheeks turned warm, "Say what's your name?"

Good it's working. "My name is Miles! Miles Morales," Being extremely shy all of sudden, then awkwardly said, "You can just call me, Miles- I mean of course since that's my name, but- I don't really have any nicknames so yeah..."

"Sunflower."

"Huh?"

"If it's alright for me to call you, Sunflower?" Hobie calmly asked having to take a sip of his beer, "You remind me of a Sunflower, beautiful and bright." His eyes soften at Miles, with a sly grin.

Miles' could feel his face turning bright red like an anime character with small heated steam coming out his head. His eyes widen and quickly said, "Me beautiful? Nah, man. You're just saying that. Hahaha, but now that you mention it, sunflowers are my favorite flowers." He chuckles having this cute snort at the end.

If Hobie can turn pink, he would. He felt his face warm, surprising himself by these feelings. This was new to him, it's been a long time since he felt this way. The party around them were all avoided as they lock eyes being focus with each other.

"Oh yeah?" Hobie asked without thinking, it's like his body went on autopilot.

Miles nodded, "Yeah, I love them. They make me happy when I see them." He took a small sip of his beer, "I don't mind you calling me, Sunflower... but we just met?"

"No worries, Sunflower. I'm very friendly." He shrugs, "I'm sure we will get to know each other very well after this."

"Oh? Are you planning to make me one of your groupies?" Miles asked with his eyes fixed on Hobie's posture. "Because- mmm sorry, man. I'm more a romantic."

"Heh, wow you're a quick lad." Hobie let a small 'heh' before grinning wider, "I like that."

"Do you, Mr. Brown?" The young man rested his chin on his hand being amused. "I do like this. I think your an interesting guy."

"Really? I've been called many things but interesting."

"Oh please! You know you're cool and play sweet ass music. How they never told you, you're interesting?" Miles arched his eyebrow.

"Who's they?"

"They people, the paparazzis, anyone! Besides," The twenty five year old looks down at his beer with his honey-brown eyes, "I think your very inspirational, too."

"Now, that's a word they haven't used." Hobie said sounding a bit flabbergasted by the word choice. He's been called so many things because of his controversial beliefs and hectic performances. Hell, most of the time a riot will start, and to avoid fucking pigs he had his lawyers always ready with permits and waivers for their concerts. So that's a win. Yet the public eye view him to be some sort of terrorist or nuisance, it's all too funny really.

"Yeah, I think you're very inspirational. This world is full of bullshit, and you really given people to be more involved. I dunno how to explain it." Miles placed his index finger on his lush lips trying to find the right words, "For me, I like how you giving power to the people, a voice, their rights! We need that. I think you're a great role model for the younger generation." He smiles widely at him. "So yeah, you are inspirational!"

"Stop pulling my leg."

"No, I think you're amazing, man. I really do believe we need more people like you out here. You're making a different." Then Miles lift Hobie's face to meet his own, his honey-brown eyes serious and his voice stern, "Don't let anyone one say other wised! The media can suck ass, because they don't know what we go through. You get us, you're special! Don't ever forget that!"

Hobie could feel his body froze and turned pink, metaphorically speaking, his cheeks went into a darker shade, eyes widen as if he felt his a pang in his heart. His stomach fluttered with an uneasy swooshing feeling, he felt all words gone from his thoughts when he look at the shy man in front of him. "I love you." Were the words came right out of his mouth.

The two stood in shock hearing the party around them. Miles' blink a couple of times then shouted, "EHHHH?"

Hobie quickly cover his mouth, "What was that?" He mentally scream in his head. "Quickly. Say something else!" His mouth open trying to apologize instead his body had his own thoughts.

"I love you. I love you, Miles." His words kept coming out, "Be with me."

Miles rub his lips together never feeling so bashful before. When Hobie took his hand placing it on his chest, he could feel his heart pounding against his chest. "Sunflower..." His eyes soften with love.

"I-I..." The twenty five year old can't say anything else being wooed and flooded with panic. His emotions all over, how did this handsome singer loves him? He pulled his hand back to his chest feeling his own heart beating super fast.

Hobie was about to reach over to kiss him, until- "MILES! THERE YOU ARE!" They turned to hear a voice they know.

"Gwen!" Miles' face brightens to find his friend.

Gwen came from the crowd pulling Miles' into a hug, "Oh my gawd! It's so fucking good to see you!"

"How you been!" Miles hugs her back.

Hobie pouts seeing how he's being ignored. Not until, Gwen glanced over at him then scowls. "I see, you met Hobie. Word of advice Miles' stay away from him. He's not committed to honest relationships!" She closely wrapped her arms around her best friends shoulder around, the two being equally tall. The blond drummer scowls and pointed at Hobie with two fingers then back to her eyes a sign that means I'm-watching-you-buddy.

Miles could only giggle, "Huh? I kinda figure when I saw him making out with two girls... nothing wrong with that." He quickly added, "It's just... I'm a very basic person to date."

Hobie placed on hand in his leather pants' back pocket, "Heh, I'm open to all sorts of relationships, luv. Perhaps we can meet each other," He eyes at Gwen, "alone, for coffee."

Gwen puffs her cheeks getting mad that her friend is trying to get with her best friend. "No! Miles, you and I made plans!"

"Oh this cockblocker!" Hobie smile waved by his drummer attempts to have them separated.

"It's fine Gwen. You told me, I need to experience London... so maybe," Miles' eyes on Hobie's crotch to his face playing the shy act, "I like to try it all. How about tomorrow?"

"Perfect, darling. How about noon? I might have a terrible hang over." The singer jokes.

Gwen could only sigh, "Okay, Miles. But don't say I didn't warn you. I'm just protecting you for guys like him!" She's honest, and worrisome for her best friend, she knew Miles is too honest, and pure with relationships. Maybe that's why his last one didn't work out.

"I know, Gwen. I'll be fine." Miles cutely pouts. Then turns to Hobie, "By the way, that introduction speech was funny. Will that be made into a shirt?" He asked.

"Huh?" The singer looked confused.

Gwen crossed her arms, "He's talking about your Bitches and Bros!"

"Oh!" Hobie deep laughter got Miles' awning at his handsome face, "I was saying shit outta my ass, sunflower."

"No shit. Trans thotties?" Gwen snorted.

"Got a bit butt hurt, darling?" Hobie jokes with his drummer.

"No!"

"I thought you would be offended because you're not a thottie." Hobie shade her for her lack experiences.

"Ugh, you're such a dick, Hobie!" Gwen said out loud.

Miles laughs, "Awe, Gwen. I think your a Thottie."

"Thanks, Miles. See, a true friend. Fucking hurt him and I will fuck you up, Hobie!" Gwen puff her chest out having to threaten her singer.

"Gwen, be nice!" Miles whines.

Hobie could only laugh in amusement, "Darling, it's fine. I've dealt with her all the time."

"Hey!"

Miles could only laugh out loud while Hobie lovingly watches him.

#punkflower #flowerpunk #miles morales #hobie brown #spiderman #spider man #spider verse #spiderverse #across the spider verse #across the spiderverse #atsv

54 notes · View notes