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kiwisbell · 4 months

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let it snow [joel miller]

It's cold on the trail. Joel keeps you warm.

12 days of pedro masterlist | my masterlist

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

rating: 18+ (mdni)

tags/warnings: an early winter smattering of daddy kink, feel free to picture game!joel or show!joel here, post-outbreak, jackson!joel, christmastime fuzzies, soft old man!joel, self-indulgent age gap (20s/50s), protective!joel, christmas tree hunting, hiking, sex in an apocalypse, snowball play(?), fingering, frostbite does not exist in this universe, thigh fucking, dirty talk, ellie loving dinosaurs, snowball fights, a joel who enjoys what little peace life brings him

word count: ~ 5.3k

read on ao3!

a/n: hi, lovelies - this fic is my contribution to @hellishjoel's 12 days of pedro celebration! everyone please check out the masterlist linked above to check out the other works from all of these amazing authors!! thank you endlessly to my parents @northernbluess and @tieronecrush for beta'ing this fic and reassuring me every step of the way - i love you both to the moon and back. i hope you enjoy and as usual, please mind the tags and please tell me what you think!! ❄️

super cute dividers by @saradika-graphics!!

Fall comes on slow. The leaves begin to bleed orange from the arteries. The air crackles with bright, cold wind that bites and pokes. Debris crunches underfoot and the trees shed their lustrous coats. It’s nothing like the onset of winter in Jackson—the downward crash of an overnight snowstorm that crests too quickly for the residents to prepare.

It's a crystallised, overrefined flurry of soft flakes that gather on thatched rooftops and bury the barren, browning garden beds in the western corner of the village. It’s a nighttime assault of gnashing wind carrying fractals of ice and snow, and before most are awake, Jackson is snowed in.

The children are thrilled. All of them too small to have known anything but the walls of the town, they burst from their homes, half-zipped coats and bright-and-early tummy-rumblings and wondrous impatience, to stick out their tongue and catch the still-falling snowflakes. Parents and caretakers and teachers straggle, still pulling on their own boots and coats, in the effort to stay close to their charges. Snowballs are packed together and hurled from behind fortified walls of snow; passers-by are pulled unwittingly into the two-sided, relentless barrage; and the shrieks and cries crackling into the dead white air are born from the watery womb of promise, not terror.

There’s some joy yet to be found in this world.

He isn’t participating in the frozen-water war, but he’s watching from the margins, leaning against the wall of the schoolhouse with his arms folded over his chest and his eyes hawklike as he observes your every move.

A group of young girls has inducted you into the battle and now you’re hiding with one of them behind a wall, packing a tight ball of snow in your hands, barely protected by your threadbare gloves. He can see the grip of the cold on your body, the way your breath circles above your head, a silvery halo. He can see the slight shivers that start in your lower spine and tremble their way up to the back of your neck, and he can see the phantom imprint of his hand resting there, warming your nape, curling his callused fingers around your brain stem and guiding you the way he liked. He can see your gentle touch not only in your hands but in your smile, in the soft application of snow to the top of the wall as it begins to melt, in the sweet curl of your mouth as you help a child who has fallen to their feet.

Swiping an accumulation of snow from the child’s nose with your thumb, you mouth some words he cannot see. The child sniffs happily and wraps their arms around their mother’s leg.

You sneak away from the barrage of snowballs and blow some warm air into your cupped hands. He shifts off the wall and begins to prowl toward you.

When he’s close enough, when no one is around nor awake enough to notice, pulls you into the alley between the schoolhouse and the theatre.

His mouth captures your surprised exhale, stealing the visible puff of warm air for himself, swallowing it down as he pries you open for him. His hand rediscovers the slow, warm pleasure of its resting place on the back of your neck, gently steering you, unkindly pinning your body to the wall.

He feels the itch of your gloves as you cup his face, and his other hand lifts to circle around both of your wrists, idly pressing them beneath his heavy coat, against his heart. It thuds strongly, pouring its rhythm into the grooves of your palms.

He crowds you, making you small, his desire for this closeness prodding your inner thigh. You go oh-so easily, the gruff sounds he spills into your mouth tapping, chiselling, knocking down each vertebrae. Carefully, with the slide of his warm, wet tongue along yours and the greedy assault of his mouth, he shapes you for himself and turns you into the pliant little thing he needs you to be.

You moan softly into his mouth, and his answering groan is something rabid. Your spine curves to him, gravitational pull, wooden slats of the building at your back tugging the fabric of your coat. He will kiss you until you’re breathless and preening under his touch because it’s what he always does. He will inculcate you with the knowledge that you’re for his eyes only.

When he pulls away, he watches you chase his mouth with lidded eyes and kiss-bruised lips, and he smirks. His hand moves to your head, gently smoothing down your crown to your jaw, the way one tenderly pets a kitten.

“Got you somethin’.”

You raise your brows. “You did?”

“Mhm.” He nudges his nose against yours and relishes the smile you give him—eyes crinkling at the corners, irises reflecting glistening sky. “Open your mouth for me first. Go on, now.”

You obey, letting your tongue loll out, more from habit than anything. Still, he’s pleased, unfurling the hastily-wrapped paper package in his pocket and placing the small square of chocolate on your tongue.

You close your mouth with the help of his hand on your jaw, and the gentle snap of the chocolate bleeds the melting centre down your throat, disseminating the oaky flavour on your tastebuds.

“Y’like it?”

His voice is a carving knife. You're split down the middle by his simple show of affection, spilling out into his arms, wrists still clasped in one of his big hands.

“It’s good,” you tell him. “I’ve never…”

His smile digs a thumb into your open wound. “I know. Took it from the kitchen.”

You lick your lips and swallow the rest of the melted chocolate. Joel watches the action from the moment your tongue darts out to the moment it retreats. “Maria will have your ass.”

“Hmm, Maria can tell me off much as she wants. Wanted to give you somethin' sweet.” He presses in closer, hands dropping to your hips, kneading the pad of his thumbs over your hips. You're wearing old jeans whose waistband is fraying. “What do you say?”

This is the fun part of the game you play. His thumb brushes your bottom lip, teasing, begging entrance even though he knows there isn't a world in which you would deny him. You part your lips and take his thumb into your mouth, swirling your tongue and cleaning off the taste of leather that still lingers on his skin.

“Thank you.”

He strokes your jaw with his thumb. “You wanna know what else?”

You're already leaning into his palm as he cradles your cheek, and he’s so proud of the volcanic thaw in your eyes. “What else?”

Joel reaches back into his coat pocket and places something small in your palms. It’s a smooth wooden figurine that smells faintly of sawdust and is carved in the perfect likeness of your home, which sits across the street from his.

“‘s almost Christmas,” he says, suddenly so unsure of himself as he watches you turn the little shack over in your hands. “Thought you might like—”

But you're leaping onto him like a little monkey, your mouth crashing against his. It’s all lips and teeth and tongue and he can taste the chocolate he placed there just moments ago. The chimney of your miniature home prods his chest as you hold the figure close, tucking it safely between your bodies.

“Easy, baby girl,” he says with a low laugh, not-quite pulling away, letting you lick into his mouth like a cat after milk. The scratch of his beard will leave patches on your chin and everyone will see them. He grins, tilting your head up and soothing the worried skin with soft kisses.

“I love it,” you tell him, sighing into his body, “so much. I love it, Joel.”

“Good.” He nudges his nose against your temple. “Take good care of it, now.”

You nod, scratching at the too-long hair curling slightly at the nape of his neck. “How do you know that it's almost Christmas?” you ask him after a moment.

“Took a guess,” he says, nipping your earlobe. “Y’know, the big tree they put up in the middle of town helps.”

You playfully tug his hair. “Asshole.”

“So goddamn mouthy. Gettin’ spoiled.”

“You're the one spoiling me,” you purr, mouthing wetly along his jaw.

Joel chuckles. “Yeah. Guess I am.”

“You know”—your voice takes on a musical lilt—“I don't have my Christmas tree yet.”

Joel lifts his brows. “You want a Christmas tree?”

You lift one shoulder in a shrug. “I don’t really remember the holidays.”

The watery shimmer under your irises reminds Joel just how much more life he's lived. You were young when the outbreak started, both parents lost to the virus before the first week was out. You’d hid under your bed for three days straight before FEDRA found you.

They’d taken you, underfed and dehydrated, to the Colorado QZ, where you spend most of your adolescence until it was bombed by Fireflies. You'd managed to sneak away before they could round you up like FEDRA had. You’d travelled with one group to the next before Jackson welcomed you.

There's a scar on your throat, just below your jaw on the right side, and another at the nape of your neck. You've been held at knifepoint, you told him in the early days of knowing one another, by the very same people who'd taken you in as one of their own. They’d offered you up as trade for some deer meat. Joel traces the mark and feels his throat constrict.

The kind of life you’d led before Jackson… He’ll make sure you never have to run again.

“Let’s get you one,” he says. “Tomorrow.”

You pull away from him to meet his eye. “Joel…”

“Tommy’s got a saw behind the bar. I can take down a tree. We’ll bring it back ‘n’ put it up in your place.”

The grin creeps up at the corner of your mouth. “You're going soft, Miller.”

Joel just crowds you back against the wall and slants his mouth over yours. He has no problem going soft when he can feel the wooden edges of his gift to you prodding the flesh of his chest. Let it pierce him.

Joel has few rules he's willing to push back on. At his age, he's lost some of his jagged edges, compromising on more. When he's got you like this, tucked into his side, wearing only his shirt, he remembers exactly why he enforces these few rules.

The light is soft in the winter; it doesn't quite penetrate his eastern-facing window the way the summer sun does. He blinks awake, feeling you shift next to him, your nose buried in his throat. Your arms are wrapped tight around his middle, one leg hoisted over his torso.

“C’mon, baby,” he grunts, throwing his arm over his eyes. “Gotta get up.”

He can feel your sleepy pout against his neck. “Mph.”

“Yeah, I know.” Joel chuckles, slumping back into the mattress. You shift so you're on top of him, your thighs bracketing his hips. Sitting up, you explore his bare chest with your soft hands, migrating down the length of his torso and his softening belly. He grabs your hips and soothes himself awake by rubbing his hands up and down your sides. The fabric of his shirt draped over your body shifts under his palms.

“I’m patrolling with Tad,” you tell him, “so we’ll have to put up the tree when I get back.”

“No, you're not.”

You cock your head. “Tommy told me—”

“Tommy doesn't know what the hell he's talkin’ about,” says Joel. “You and I get the day off. And I”—he pulls you down toward him and secures his hand at the back of your neck—“know a spot.”

Your answering hum is playful. “You know a spot. I had a couple boyfriends back in the QZ who knew a spot, too, Miller.”

“I ain't your old boyfriends,” he says with a faint growl, landing a light smack on your ass. “There’s a good trail west of here. Some trees what would look nice all done up.”

You beam down at him. Your hair is somewhat tousled from sleep and the fuzzy light haloes your head. “You aren't worried about raiders?”

“Don't think I can keep you safe?” He caresses your bare thighs, his cock interested in the warmth of you on his lap.

Your mouth fits over his, fingers threading through his hair, and Joel settles into the steady rhythm of your heartbeat fluttering against his own chest.

“I think,” you whisper, “that we're already late. Let's go get a Christmas tree.”

Half an hour later, he’s still yawning on his way to the stables and wishing he was in the warmth of his bed instead of out here in the biting cold. Joel runs his gloved palms together and fixes his rifle over his shoulder.

You, of course, are fresh-faced and early, securing the saddle over your chestnut mare Princess. Joel pats her snout and inspects your pack where it hangs on the hook nearby.

“Forgot your bandages again.”

You hum and it's music. “You always have extra. Ready to go?”

“Sure you’re not waiting for Tad?”

You gently pat your horse’s back. “Tad is terrified of you, so he's terrified of me. You're ruining my reputation, Miller.”

“That so?” Joel sidles up next to you, pushing your pack into your arms. “You got a complaint you wanna file?”

“None so far,” you say, biting down on your grin, “but there's always time. Better be careful with me.”

“I’m always careful,” Joel says into your ear. “Now go on. We got ground to cover.”

There is a method to Joel Miller’s madness. Tommy knows damn well he needs to pick his battles. But Joel will always win when it comes to you. That is where he simply does not compromise.

“I’m gonna fuckin’ kill you, Tommy.”

His brother’s hands fly up, palms out, already pleading his case. “Joel, listen to me—”

Joel slaps the book against Tommy’s chest. “I don't need to hear your goddamn excuses. She doesn't go with anyone but me.”

“Listen,” says Tommy, tossing the worn leather agenda aside. “We've got people out sick, and they ain't about to go out in this cold. And you need to be with Flynn, ‘cause Christ knows he ain't trained up enough to handle anything up in those woods.”

Joel scoffs. “And Tad’s trained up enough to go with her? Don't give me that shit, Tommy. She goes with me.”

“Joel—”

“We clear?” He squares up to his brother, folding his arms over his chest.

Tommy rolls his eyes at Joel’s posturing but concedes nonetheless. “Fine. I’ll take Flynn.”

“Good.” Joel turns to leave for the stables. He’s stopped by a hand on his shoulder.

“She’s a strong girl,” says Tommy, “and you can't play guard dog forever.”

The snow has settled a bit in the week since the first fall. It's crystallised and hardened underfoot, packed tightly. Icicles dangle from the naked trees on the outskirts of the woods, and your breath mists. The cold penetrates your jeans and the slivers of exposed wrists where your gloves don't quite meet your coat sleeves. Hugging Joel around the middle, your body heat shudders through him.

“Snow like this is always a goddamn problem,” he mutters.

“Covers tracks,” you say.

“That's right. You do listen.”

“Well, when you give me chocolate…”

Joel veers Princess north and brings your gloved palms to his mouth so he can breathe warm air into them. You sigh your thanks, bumping your forehead into his back before returning to your vigilance as lookout. Once you're well out of the way of the city walls, it's easier to get wrapped up in the blistering wind. You bring your bandanna up over your nose and watch Joel do the same as you pass the river. It’s frozen over, not blue but a sheet of miserable white. You mourn the loss of colour as the wind nips at your skin.

“We’ll have more cover when we break through the trees,” says Joel. “Shuffle closer to me.”

You do, sliding your hips forward. Princess’s reins around one fist, he covers your hands with his other, squeezing you intermittently. His body heat helps you settle comfortably into him.

“What was your first Christmas like with Sarah?”

Joel chuckles. “She was one hell of a rowdy kid. Had to fish her out of the tree one time—only turned my back for a goddamn second.”

You smile fondly. “Thought you were gonna have to drag Ellie kicking and screaming out of that snowball fight the other day. She was a minute away from nailing your brother in the face.”

“Hmph. Asshole probably deserved it,” says Joel. “Sarah’d never hurt a fly. She saved spiders; threw ‘em outside instead of killin’ ‘em. But she’d get along with Ellie. Sometimes I look at her and see Sarah.” Joel’s quiet for a moment, guiding Princess past the tree line where the wind begins to penetrate in bursts rather than a constant stream of cold. “Do you think that's wrong?”

You frown. “No. I don't think so. Sometimes, I talk to kids in town that remind me of you. They’ll have a nose or eyes that make me think of you, and I’ll think it’s so nice that we’re all still here, still kicking. You know? There are parts of Sarah in Ellie and there are parts of that tree over there in me. When we love someone, we see them everywhere.”

Joel brings Princess to a halt about a half-mile into the woods; a trail veers off to the east next to you. He loops her reins around the branch of a tree and helps you off the horse. “Y’know,” he says, “you're too damn smart for your own good.”

“You’ll do well to remember that, Miller.” You shove your bandanna back down so it lies limp around your neck. “Now show me this spot.”

Joel failed to warn you that it involved a hike. An honest-to-fuck hike. You and your boots are used to traversing long distances, but you hadn't particularly prepared to trek through the frozen woods in December on a few hours’ sleep, a couple hours’ orgasm, and a hastily-chugged cup of coffee. Not had you prepared for an uphill hike in the brutal cold just to find a fucking Christmas tree.

If you didn't like him so damn much, you know for a fact you'd happily throttle your Joel.

Your Joel, who can't seem to find a tree that's good enough for you. Too tall, he'll say about one, won't fit inside your place. Too skinny, he’ll say about another, you could barely string lights on that.

Your lungs are burning cold. Every breath you inhale feels like swallowing needles. Your chest heaves and your cheeks are numb and you’re drawing up what's left of your resolve to give him a piece of your mind.

“Nah, not this one,” he’s saying, knocking his fist against the trunk of another tree. “It’s practically hollow. Would crumble the second we—”

“Joel, if you could find a tree you do like so we can head back and I can stop freezing to death, that would be so, so appreciated.”

Your teeth chatter the whole time, but you get your message across. Joel stops, his hand splayed against another tree, a smaller one with a decent-sized middle, and turns to face you.

“You cold, baby?”

It's not an innocent question. Around you, the wind whips at the branches of the tallest trees and crackles through the air. But Joel’s voice, slow and gravel-thick, permeates the breeze. It bites deeper, to the gums, latched in your skin. It’s warm.

No—it's hot.

Joel’s hand drops from the tree. His foot crunches the snow under his boot as he takes a step toward you.

Wordlessly, you nod.

“You had lots to say before, baby girl. Thought you wanted your Christmas tree.”

You do. Fuck, you want to go home. You want to curl up in his bed with another cup of coffee and warm yourself up with his body. But Joel is staring at you, eyes hard, rubbing his gloved hand over his mouth, and the alternative now feels much more tempting. “Uh-huh.”

“I think you should see for yourself,” he says, “whether or not you want this one. Go on.”

He's playing some game. He’s ringed with silvery light, a soft and hazy glow backlighting his longer hair, threaded with grey, his body so broad, solid, strong—

There’s none of your Joel in the way he stands. This is the Joel who’s used to following orders. This is the Joel he never lets you truly see: the man who has seen so many more years, seen so much more of the world.

You pass him, hiking farther up the trail, to inspect the tree. It is decent; just taller than you, but thick enough to stay upright, plush with needles. A gentle tug at your scalp, a puff of warm air on your cheek, the dizzying weight of him at your back. He’s twirling a lock of your hair between two gloved fingers.

“You like it?” he says gruffly, his mouth mere inches from your ear. The telltale tingling begins in your core and you swallow hard.

“Joel, I didn’t mean to—”

“Shhh. None of that. I wasn’t thinkin’, sweetheart.” He nips at your earlobe, hands trailing down your body, underneath your heavy coat, sitting warmly on your hips. “Gotta keep my girl nice ‘n’ warm. Got all caught up in my own head, thinkin’ like a carpenter. Let me make it up?”

He loves so selflessly that it can feel bizarrely like greed.

Sometimes, you forget that he’s so much older. That he lived his own way of living for a long time before you came along, that he knows this planet like that back of his hand, that you can’t even begin to name a country or a food or a song that FEDRA didn’t teach you. That you’ve only just begun to experience the terror and the pain that’s engulfed this world for so long.

Joel Miller’s lived a long life. He’s choosing to spend these moments with you, in the cold, dead woods, picking out a Christmas tree. For as long as he’s been waking up with you, his girl, he’s wanted you longer. He’s tired. He’s old. But he’s finally getting to choose.

He’d like to think he deserves a bit of choice after all this time. So, again, he comes back to you, like the last time and the last, spreading his fingers over your body and cupping you, molten gold, in his hands.

Settle down, his brother told him a few years back. You deserve this, Joel. To just… settle down, if you can ever find a way.

You’re his way. He intends to make it clear.

“Need to hear you say yes, baby,” he says, shifting your hair aside, nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck where it’s warm and quiet and smells of the coffee he always makes you.

“Yes,” you whisper, reaching back to fix your hand at the nape of his neck and glue him to you. “Please. Please, Joel.”

He grins, pressing an open-mouthed kiss to your throat, the fluttering veins below your jaw. He steals every one of your heartbeats for himself.

“All right,” he says. “We’ll get this one.”

Eyes lidded, you watch over your shoulder as Joel fiddles with the button of your jeans and yanks down your panties with them, now hanging limply off your knees.

“Joel!” you gasp. The cold air bites your thighs, your ass, your poor, slick pussy, as he unwraps his present. Playfully squeezing your ass, he grinds his clothed front against you.

“Yeah, baby?” he mumbles, the smug bastard, pinning you to the tree by his strong hips, your fingers splayed on the trunk. Above you, pine needles flutter down to the ground around you, but the trunk doesn't budge.

It is a good tree.

“‘m cold,” you manage, putty in his hands, under the sweet, slow kisses he's pressing to your jaw.

Your petulant whine rivals the pitch of the wind off the mountain trail. The whistling air shrieks. The hard weight at your back absconds with the warmth it brought you, and he's bending to one knee, packing a not-quite spherical ball of snow in his gloves.

“You’re cold?” It doesn't sound like a question and you're nodding anyway, your cheek scraping the bark of the fir tree. It smells of terpenes and the shingles of bark bleed resin.

“I’m so cold, Daddy.”

He stands, and a huge glove is caging your ribs, a bearded cheek nuzzling your temple. “Let’s see, baby girl. Open wide.”

He brings his other hand between your exposed thighs and, lips prying at the corner of your mouth, cups the feebly-formed snowball against your pussy.

“Daddy,” you gasp, writhing away and grinding into his hand all the same, your mouth open in a long, pitiful cry. Your silvery breath ascends in a long-limbed dance with his own.

The snow melts in moments, rubbed firm into the scorching heat of your body, but you feel the biting cold against your clit as if it were pulled between a set of pearly teeth.

“See?” There’s a cruel tone of mocking in it and you preen like it’s a sweet lullaby. “Nice ‘n’ warm.”

He mouths at the crook of your neck, hot and wet, tongue dipping into the junction between your ear and your jaw, where it’s soft and does not hurt when he bites down.

The once-packed snow, now tepid and formless, drips down your thighs, and the air is so cold it begins to freeze again. Joel hears your helpless moan and takes pity, unbuckling his own jeans just enough to pull out his cock.

But he doesn't slot himself at your needy hole and push slowly inside you the way he did last night. No—he guides the leaking head between your thighs and closes your legs around him, the length of him flush to your cunt.

“Ohhhh, fuck.” You shiver, dropping your forehead against the tree, as Joel lubricates his cock with the melted water of the snowball and begins to fuck himself between the cushions of your thighs. “Joel… oh my God, Daddy—”

He grunts, taking it slow, the wet slide of his cock electrifying, cold and warm all at once, his body caging yours against the tree. With every thrust, the head of his cock catches on your clit, and he gasps in your ear, nibbling your exposed skin. You grasp at his hair, the hand that presses down on your belly, fixing him to you.

“That's it, baby. Goddamn, you feel so good. So fuckin’ soft, just for me, all for Daddy, right, baby girl?”

“Yes, yes! I’m yours, all yours, please…” Your thighs twitch when his cock drags along your clit once more, and it's so good—but it's not enough.

“I know,” groans Joel, lowering your joined hands to your clit and rubbing slow, aching circles over your slick pearl. A strained moan rumbles in your chest and your head grows heavy, falling back on his shoulder. The pleasure, white-hot and insistent, makes you forget all about the cold air savagely biting off chunks of your skin. It's all Joel. “I know, baby girl. That feel good?”

“Mmmm,” you manage, breathless and panting, your exhales swirling up into the air and disappearing in the trees. He keeps your hands joined, working in tandem to pleasure your needy clit. “Mhm, so good. Just like that.”

Joel nods into the crook of your neck, keeping the pressure steady on your clit as he continues to get himself off between your legs. “My pretty girl, so cold,” he rasps, “so needy. Y’know I’d get you anything you wanted.”

You nod vigorously, wetting his cock with your arousal, gloved fingers slick on your pussy. The rough grind of the leather closes an electrical circuit up and down your body. Joel Miller has always known how to make you feel safe, cared-for—sensations you'd never known before Jackson. With him, you're glutted, satiated. With you, he’s begun his long winter’s task of settling down.

“Let go for me, baby,” he says, taking your jaw between his teeth as he feels his stomach tighten, his balls pulling up. “C’mon, baby girl, let me feel it. Get yourself all warm with me.”

He rubs your clit faster until you're seizing, core tensing, your mouth open in a long, low cry that echoes down the trail. Joel talks you through it, good girl, that’s it, I know it’s a lot, honey, just let go, and your fingers flex, trapped in his, as you come until your legs are trembling.

Joel hums like he's satisfied, his hips pummeling into your backside in stuttering thrusts that indicate he's coming, too. “You gonna let me come, baby girl?” he says, baring his teeth against your cheek. “Gonna forgive me?”

“Yesyesyes! Fuck, you’re so good. Please come for me, Daddy, please!”

“Fuck, baby, I will. I will.” And he does—stuffing his cock between your thighs, it begins to pulse beneath your cunt, spilling hot cum all over your legs, your pussy, the tree he’s pinned you against. All the while, he holds you tight, his mouth greedy on you, words coaxed into your ears that aren't meant for another soul.

“You’re mine. All fuckin’ mine.” He's rambling as he comes down, spurts of cum still dribbling from his cock down your thighs. “Goddamn perfect.”

You shiver as the cold begins to seep back in through your skin, even as Joel helps pull your jeans back up over your ass. It's a bit uncomfortable, feeling the slide of his cum on your legs underneath the denim, but you smile anyway, letting him guide you to face him, your foreheads pressing together.

“I like this one,” you tell him. Joel laughs, bringing your mouth to his for another kiss.

“Dude, where the fuck did you get this?”

You look over your shoulder at Ellie, who inspects your miniature figurine, now with a home just inside your foyer.

“Joel gave it to me,” you tell her.

“Whooooa. You think he could make me a dinosaur?”

You turn to Joel, who's nursing some bourbon and hiding a smile in the rim of the glass. “That's a great question, Ellie. What do you think, Joel?”

“C’mon, man, when do I ever ask you for anything?”

Joel chokes into his glass. “Every goddamn day of your life, Ellie.”

“Okay, well, just think about how cool it would be to have a dinosaur. It’s basically the real thing.”

Joel shakes his head. “Yeah, okay. Maybe next year.”

“Ugh. Fine. But don't think I’m not gonna remember.”

Idly rubbing his back, you lean into him and turn your head toward the tree. It sits tall and proud in the corner, strung with a couple coloured lights Maria had found for you, hung with baubles that some of the schoolchildren had been thrilled to make. It's a bit bare in spots, haphazardly decorated, prickly to the touch.

“You like it?” asks Joel, nudging his nose against your temple.

“It's perfect.”

He grins into your cheek. “You think she’ll like the dinosaur?”

Your eyes fall to the smattering of gifts under the tree, tossed into spare crates and bags.

“Ellie, why don't you open first?”

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tia-222 · 8 months

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The Complete Guide to Lucid dreaming to enter the void state/ Shift ⋆ ☾ ✿

✰ Table of contents ✰ :

• Introduction

• What is lucid dreaming ?

• How to increase lucid dreaming efficiency.

• Lucid dreaming techniques.

• How to make portals for lucid dreaming

• Lucid dreaming resources + Meditations and Subliminals

• Google drive books you can read on lucid dreaming.

『 ↳ ✧･ﾟ Introduction :

Lucid dreaming is an extremely fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a person's becomes aware that they dreaming, while asleep. In a lucid dream the person can control the dream and it's narrative that is happening. Lucid dream allows you to enter the void state or shift instantly♡. This post will help you too gain knowledge on how to induce a lucid dream tonight! This post is full of methods and techniques used to induce lucid dreaming to enter the void state.

『 ↳✧･ﾟ What is Lucid Dreaming ?

A lucid dream is a dream where a person become aware that they are dreaming while being in a dream like state. In a lucid dream, the dreamer has the ability to control the dream and it's contents and has fully awareness while doing that. Lucid dreams can vary in intensity, while others have simply partial awareness in a dream state. Lucid dreaming occurs most, while you are in Rapid eye movement ( Rem) stage of sleep. Rem sleep is associated with high consciousness and high awakenings of dreams. Dreams in Rem sleep are very vivid and memorable. Lucid dreaming can absolutely amazing and a unique experience.

『 ↳✧･ﾟ How to increase Lucid Dreaming efficiency.

✩ Keep a dream journal - it's good to maintain a dream journal to record your dreams after waking up. By doing this you will improve your dream recall and it will make it easier recognize dreams and lucidity.

✩ Reality checks - perform a reality check during the day to increase your awareness between your waking life and dreams. This practice can be carried over to your dreams and increases your chances of becoming lucid.

✩ How to do reality checks in lucid dreams ?

Pinching your nose trying to breathe :

Close your nostrils with your fingers and try to breathe through with your nose. In a lucid dream, you will be able to breathe with nostrils closed.

Counting fingers :

Look at you fingers, once aware in a dream. If you finger's appears to have a different number then you are lucid dreaming.

Text reading :

Look at a piece of text and then look away. In a dream , the text will become changeable and unreadable most likely.

✩ Mnemonic induction of Lucid dreams ( MILD ) - before falling asleep, repeat a phrase or affirmation to yourself, like " tonight I will lucid dream " and then visualise yourself entering a lucid dream while affirming.

✩ Reality testing in dreams - during dreaming periods , where you become aware that you are dreaming perform a reality check to check whether you are dreaming or not. Most used are attempting to pass through objects or trying to breath while holding your nose .

『 ↳✧･ﾟLucid Dreaming techniques

✧ Finger induced lucid dream ( FILD ) technique to lucid dream ( credits to Gorgeouslypink because she introduced it first) :

The finger induced Lucid dream technique is a variation of the wake induced Lucid dream ( WILD ) technique that involves using finger movements to induce a lucid dream.

Set an alarm to wake you up in REM sleep which 4 - 6 Hours after you sleep. This time is the best because of the increased rem sleep, which is the period most dream starts to occur.

When you wake up , go to bed immediately. Keep your entire body relaxed and then start gently tapping or pressing your fingers against each other as if you was playing the piano. The movements need to be subtle gentle. Fingers are recommended are the index and middle finger.

After performing the finger movements, you will start to feel a shift in your awareness. This where you will slip into a lucid dream. Pay attention to your surroundings around you and sensation's you feel that indicates that you may have entered a lucid dream.

Once aware that you are in a lucid dream take a moment to stabilize by engaging in all your senses. Do a reality to see if you are in a lucid dream.

The original poster of the fild method explains it :

The Setup:

1. Go to sleep. Its that simple.. No hypnosis or visualization required.

2. To perform this technique, you have to be extremely close to falling asleep. The best time is either in the middle of the night, or in the morning. However, using this technique in the morning can often cause shorter LDs.

3. If you want to try FILD during the night, you have to find some way to wake up. There are various methods.. Find one that works for you.

4. Once you wake up, the first thing that should be on your mind is the FILD technique. Immediately relax, and try to go back to sleep how you normally would. The goal here is to get to the point just before you fall back to sleep. Once you've reached this point, begin the FILD technique. If you fall back to sleep, dont worry... you can try again when you wake up.

The Technique:

1. Imagine for a second that you are playing a piano using your index and middle finger with one hand. Your fingers are side by side on two keys. Now, press your right finger down, leaving your left finger up. Next, press your left finger down, and lift your right finger back up. Repeat this up and down motion.

2. So you have the motion down? Try this: Imagine you are playing the piano again (using the same motion), but this time, press the keys so lightly that they don't go down. Give it a try on your computer keyboard - you should basically feel your muscles contract, but your fingers should hardly move.

3. You are almost there. All you have to do is use this finger movement when you wake up. Once you reach step 4 on the setup process, start moving your fingers. Focus on the movement. By directing your focus, you will fall asleep within seconds. Do not count your finger movements or talk to yourself in your head. Also, do not try to make yourself go to sleep.. that will only wake you up.

4. Once about 10 to 20 seconds have passed, take your other hand, and perform a nose RC. Simply pinch your nose and try to breath in. If you can, you are dreaming.

5. If you find that the RC doesn't work, don't worry.. you can try again. Just go to sleep normally, and try again when you wake up.

✧ Wake back to bed ( WBTB ) technique :

Set an alarm for a few hours before you normally get up because you'll most probably be in Rem sleep. When the alarm goes off stay awake for a short period of time, it can be anywhere too 10- 30 minutes and you can do anything during this time period. Then go back to bed with the intention of lucid dreaming. Focus on your intention to lucid dream and becoming aware within a Dream.

✧ SSILD (Senses Initiated Lucid dreaming)

The ssild method is a extremely effective dreaming technique that focuses on your senses ( sight , sounds , and touch) to induce a lucid dream.

Go to bed and set you alarm to wake you up in REM sleep which 90 minutes - 6 hours ahead. When you wake up, remain still , this will help facilitate the body to rest as if it's going back to sleep. Begin by closing your eyes, and start focusing on the darkness behind your eyes. Try to observe the imagery behind your eyes, don't strain , but gently observe. Afterwards shift your attention , focusing on what you can hear for 30 seconds - 60 seconds and pay attention to any sensory movements around you. Finally shift your attention to the feeling of touch, try to feel what's on your body like the weight of your blankets for about 20 - 40 seconds. Perform this in 2-4 cycles. Once you have done this, relax and do a reality check or go back to bed , you'll end up with a lucid dream.

『 ↳✧･ﾟ How to make portals in lucid dreams :

✩ Visualization :

Once you realise you are in a Lucid dream, start to visualise the portal you want to create. Start to imagine/see it's appearance and where it will lead you. Try see it forming where you are in front of you and you can use it to enter the void state, by saying this portal will take me instantly to the void state.

✩ Intention setting to make a portal in a lucid dream :

Set a intention in your mind by repeating to your subconscious that you will wake up in a lucid dream and find a portal that will lead to your desired place. Repeat an statement like , " Tonight I will wake up in a lucid dream and find a portal to enter ( insert desired place)".

✩ Dream control technique :

Once you aware that you are dreaming, you can a dream control technique to make a portal. When you become aware in a dream try summoning a guide or dream character to create your portal.

Dream characters

What are dream characters?

Dream characters are the individuals that you encounter once you are dreaming. Dream characters can take on any form of being including people, animals and fictional characters.

How to interact with dream characters to help you enter the void :

Summoning - once you become aware that you are dreaming, you can instantly summon a dream character by expecting and intending for them to appear. You can imagine what character you want to meet and then you can summon them to appear in front of you.

Portals and doorways - you can use doorways or portals to take you straight to your dream character. You can visualize a portal leading to where your dream character resides. You can imagine saying " this portal will take me to my dream character".

How to use dream characters to enter the void state :

Once meeting a dream character start to engage in a conversation with them. Ask them to take you straight to the void state. It's simple like that and they will take you Instantly to the void state.

『 ↳✧･ﾟReddit collection of lucid dreaming techniques that will help you too lucid dream tonight!

For lucid dreaming beginners: here’s a how to do it TONIGHT. I’ve been practicing LD for 3 years now.

( Original post )

Lucid dreaming is one of the most extravagant things I’ve ever come across. It gave me the opportunity to look forward to every night of sleep.

Here’s the trick: set an alarm before you’re 3rd or 4th REM cycle: This usually around 3:30 and 5:30 AM if you fall asleep between 11-12.

Set a quiet alarm that is calm enough to barely wake you up so you’ll still be tired. Once you wake up and turn the alarm off, try to remain conscious but move your body as little as you can. This will trick your body to go back in to sleep mode. Eventually you’ll be like “hey wait a second, this is a dream” and that’s when it’s time to fly, drive a race car, smooch a model....whatever you want!

However I find myself to be limited by whatever “situation” I end up in. I usually can’t control where my dreams “location” or “setting” is but I am always in control on my body and I can fly, do the Kamehameha, or have super strength.

Lucid Dreaming method I use and successfully taught my friends!

( original post )

So i've been Lucid dreaming all my life and a friend asked me how i did it. At first it was just me realizing i was dreaming, but then i started using the WILD technique when i found out what lucid dreaming was (i used to think it was normal and just something that happened to everyone in their dreams). I started using my own methods to reach sleep paralysis faster. This method takes about 6-7 minutes. You start off at night before you go to sleep, you have to be at least a bit drowsy. You lay down with your body facing straight and try to have everything symmetrical (left leg in the exact opposite spot as your right ect.) and your palms are facing down. This might be uncomfortable at first, but that's a good thing. So in this method you focus on each limb one by one, causing them to fall asleep. I always start off with my left leg. You can just focus on it (eyes closed obviously) and you'll get the urge to move, DONT MOVE. Do this for 60 seconds, do your right leg, then left arm, right arm, then Depending on how alseep your body is you go to your head. You'll eventually get the feeling that you're just floating and you might feel like you're rotating then you can do your exit technique. The one i use is i just picture myself in a dream or picture my self at school and just go from there. Goodluck! Post your results! This has a good 1st try success rate!

" A TECHNIQUE THAT WAS GIVEN TO ME IN MY DREAM ( 99% success rate for me) "

( Original post )

" I just wanted to share a lucid dream technique that was given to me in a dream around 10 years ago. I cannot explain but this technique works everytime I do it.

You can do it just before sleep or after sleeping 4-6 hours. You will probably have way more success doing it after 4-6h. Or in a day before a nap.

**TECHNIQUE:** Just do a square breathing technique. But you have to visualize the lines forming in your mind. For example you choose 4 seconds for every line. You inhale and at the same time you see a formation of a line (you can count but with time you will just do it without counting), then you hold for 4 seconds, then you exhale and see a formation of another line, again you continue with another line until it forms a square. Repeat again and again. You will fall asleep very quikly with this technique. So there is a line formation for every inhale and exhale but there is a pause when you hold. PS: the duration of the line and the hold need to be the same duration.

Once you have LDs please seek the understanding of the nature of reality and try to understand how you form events. Having fun is great but in dreams you can grow in an inimaginable way. Once you understand how you mind forms in your dreams you will understand how you form events in this life. <3

EDIT: I forgot to mention how you become aware in a dream with this technique. So basically this makes your dreams very very weird and vivid! It makes it so weird that you just know "aha this is a dream". **(I guess it just enhances the awareness in a concentrated way**) But I suggest you practice reality checks, it is always useful. Often, when you fail with this technique is when you was too lazy to question the dream. But even when you fail you have crazy vivid dreams. "

" My personal WILD technique that never fails me "

( Original post )

I start counting,from 1 to whatever and every 5 numbers i become self-aware of the fact that i am counting , this lasts for 5 seconds at max,a quick random mindfulness and than i start counting again and repeat.You will eventually fall asleep and become lucid or you will become aware when you enter the dream, either directly(without losing awareness once ) or indirectly(losing awareness and regaining it again).

For me it takes counting up to 300.The point here is to let go of your consciousness so you may fall asleep and regain it again every 5(,10,20 you set the rule)numbers.It is easier than you think.If you tell yourself that you will become self-aware every 5 numbers than you will become aware.Its the ability of the brain to remember to do something once the condition is met.You can practice it in a form of meditation and see it for yourself that you will become aware once 5 numbers have passed.

What is important is increasing your consciousness every 5 numbers.I for example stare at the black space with my eyes closed , you may try mindfulness or other practices.

I have very low focus and a very overactive mind so i cant stay conscious all the time so letting consciousness go and reagining it is what did the trick for me.

Tips :

Tip 1 : Now as someone else mentioned ,you should adjust the number as you see fit.If you go for 5 numbers you will have a lot more awareness but you might find it hard to fall asleep.If you go for 50 numbers you will likely lose awareness but it will help you fall asleep xD.So find the perfect balance.

ORRR since you are more likely to fall asleep in the bigger numbers you can do something like this :

From 0 to 200 regain your awareness every 50 numbers,from 200-400 every 20 numbers,from 400-500 every 10 or 5 numbers.

Tip 2: How to increase awareness : As i said you could become mindful/aware of your sorroundings/noise/breath/thought even.You need enough awareness to realise what is going on at the moment,are you counting?thinking? Etc

Tip 3 : When you count try to do it in a relaxed /gentle way because it will help you relax and fall asleep.So a number can take about 1-2 sec.Or Imagine an angelic voice counting for you :).Also count in your own language,its much easier for the brain that way.

Tip 4 : Well by counting you also reduce thoughts since a number is a thought in some way and personaly i cant have 2 thoughts at the same time.

Tip 5 : if you cant fall asleep

If you have been counting for about 30 minutes without moving a muscle and cant sleep,than i suggest you begin and visualise the dream world,imagine a scenario or recall your last dream and engage your senses one by one.Just do your best as gently as u can.Its very likely that you will not fall asleep until your brain has a dream ready.

Tip 6 : Personaly it works best on naps

『 ↳✧･ﾟ Lucid Dreaming resources + Meditations and Subliminals

Subliminals to lucid dream <3 :

432Hz lucid dreaming + 4Hz Theta and 8Hz Alpha waves

Lucid dreaming music

( Warning ) you will lucid dream vividly with this Subliminal audio.

LUCID DREAM// the ultimate lucid dreaming combo

Shift through a lucid dream

Guided meditations to lucid dream <3 :

Lucid dreaming guided meditation

Guided sleep Meditation : lucid dreaming sleep with Lucid dream sleep music

Guided sleep Meditation lucid dreaming with your higher self

Lucid dreaming guided hypnosis

『 ↳✧･ﾟ Goggle drive books you can read on Lucid dreaming. You can download them and store them on drive <33

The phase

A visionary guide to lucid dreaming methods for working with the deep dream state

Lucid dreaming Success - Achieve lucidity every night

A little bit of lucid dreaming an induction to dream manipulation

#void state #void state tips #the void state #manifestion #lucid dreaming #lucid dreaming to enter the void state #lucid dreaming tips and methods #void state methods #reality shifting #reality shifting methods #void state technique #the phase method #law of assumption #void thoughts #i am state

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nocturnowlette · 5 days

Note

do you have any hypnosis audio files youd recommend?

Honestly, the answer is a "maybe".

In my opinion, in my 8 years of listening to files, not even 1% qualify as something I'd consider well made. The vast majority are nsfw, and the vast majority of those just throw any actual hypnosis away for a sake of roleplay. That being said, here are some files that, in my estimation, are at a minimum decent.

And always, read the description of every file before listening, even after reading my descriptions.

There's puppy ones at the bottom, by the way.

First, not an audio file, but an itch.io game.

brainwasher_program by sleepingirl (18+)

This is the most competently made thing I will be showing. Sleepingirl is someone I would consider a good hypnotist skillwise.

There is also test hypnosis game1 and ithinktherefore, also itch.io text hypnosis games/sessions.

Next, to my knowledge, the best file I've personally stumbled on (though it still didn't quite wow me),

Failing to Resist by Jack Drago (18+)

This file is a trance trainer, as in a file meant to use the ideas of resistance and turn that idea against you. It does a passable job, and you might find it quite powerful and helpful if you have some stubborn tendencies as a subject.

Next is another passable trance trainer,

Mind Melt by LilithUnleashed (18+)

This file uses arousal to bring about a specific philosophy of trance, one you might find more conducive to effectiveness: enjoying trance for the sake of trance itself, not just using it as a means to an end. There is no wakener at the end.

Next, a twin pair of files,

The Call of the Void and Hypnotic Acceptance by LilithUnleashed

The Call of the Void is a sort of run of the mill hypnosis file meant to be looped, and designed to condition you to trance and specifically to Lilith to some extent. Hypnotic Acceptance is a conditioning file meant to be played out of trance and doesn't bring you in to it. It's a nice idea that can have some small potential benefits, it's also relaxing.

Lilith, in general, is a competent hypnotist, if not a bit... much... at times. That's more of a taste thing, though. She does a good job, and these files are good.

There is also this conditioning loop file by her which is also nice, as well as this one.

Next is one for the pups,

Collared Obedience by LilithUnleashed (18+)

This one is, at a minimum, a very enjoyable time. It creates a mental collar and links it with actual collars if you wish and have the means. It forms one made out of various concepts relating to obedience. The suggestions didn't stick for me, but I'm a tad stubborn.

Obedience 101 - Welcome to Class! by FlowLikeTea

If you haven't noticed, I like trance training files. It's primarily because they're some of the only ones that aren't trying to just do erotic roleplay with the facile idea of hypnosis and hypnotic aesthetics. It reminds me of the ASMR sphere in that way.

Anyways, this file is just nice. Not much else to mention.

Slow and Gentle Hypnotic Induction by GoddessSoft (NotSoftForWork)

Thank you, Ms. Soft, for making an actually competent SFW hypnosis file. Soft is quite the competent hypnotist, and we'll be showing a few of her files coming up, but this one remains my favorite. It's simply a very well done relaxation file by someone who knows her stuff and has a good understanding of most aspects of audio trances.

Good Puppy Clicker Training by GoddessSoft (18+)

This is a beginner-centric clicker training file by Ms. Soft. It's thorough, long, and pleasurable. If you haven't noticed, I have not recommended files intended to make you finish in any way. I don't like them. They do not work for me. You'll have to ask someone else. That being said, GoddessSoft's page on the link has many different puppy files to listen to. Most deal with that.

Puppydog Fractionation by GoddessSoft (18+)

Another not-specifically-nsfw-focused puppy file from Ms. Soft. If I recall right, the sound balancing might be a little iffy on this one, though. Fair warning.

That's all I remember for now, but I might have more recommendations in the future. I hope you enjoy, and be sure to tell me how you respond to some of them. Enjoy!

#owlette #hypnosis #puppy space #puppy sub #puppyposting #dogposting #puppy brain #dog brain #dumb puppy #mind control #mind conditioning #mind break #hypnok1nk #brainwashing #hypnoposting #hypno pet #hypnosis advice #hypnosis files #brain drain

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theemissuniverse · 6 months

Text

WHO IS YOUR MORTAL KOMBAT 1 BAE BASED ON YOUR PERSONALITY TYPE [MALE MK CHARACTERS]

INTP VERSION

LOGICIAN

A/N : Before y’all try to correct me - got this information from the personality database app so if you wanna tell me I’m wrong then blame the app. Also don’t take it THAT seriously. It’s just for fun. I will do a female version after this. Also please LIKE THIS TF UP. THIS TOOK ME WAY TOO LONG AND I DID CHARACTERS I HATE/DONT CARE ABOUT SO IT COULD BE FAIR PLEASE DONT DO THIS TO ME. Also, also do not say I picked favorites because unfortunately this is my personality and the characters that I wanted when I ran it through the system DID NOT match close to 100% so yeah

WARNINGS : none I think

First, what is an INTP individual?

INTP’s are logical and analytical "Logician" who prioritize knowledge and understanding. They are known for their interest in stripping away superficial details to get to the underlying principles of a system or idea. They may be seen as absent-minded professors who are highly intelligent and enjoy developing and organizing their subjective understandings into consistent systems. They are flexible and tolerant, but may become rigid when their beliefs are challenged.

Your compalability/relationship with all the MK 1 Characters

Baraka [ ENFJ - protagonist ]

Chemistry : 92%

Relationship Type : Playmate

Shared Value : Abstract

Communication Style : Educational

In a relationship, Baraka will give you anything you desire. He is always willing to do anything you ask for to please you. He wants you to be well taken care of. He wants to see you at your best even though most days he feels at his lowest. Baraka does fear that one day you might leave him for someone he feels as though is more worthy. So, he’ll always try to give you everything you have ever wanted. Your communication is always an understanding between the two of you. The two of you get each other.

Baraka is actually playful with you despite how serious he can be. He feels comfortable with you. Like he can be himself. He doesn’t have to hide who he is when he is with you. Everything just feels right. Sometimes the two of you don’t share the same goals but that’s okay. You two are different and Baraka understands that.

Bi-Han [ ENTJ - commander ]

Chemistry : 99%

Relationship Type : Soulmate

Shared Value : Intellectual

Communication Style : Rational

In a relationship, Bi-Han will try his best to be gentle with you despite his nature. You are his peace. The coldness to his ice. There is no better person to calm him down other than you. He is grumpy with everyone. It’s always him versus the world. That’s not the case with you. It’s always you and him. Together. Bi-Han feels like he can trust you and trust is an absolute big thing with him. If he cannot trust you then he mind as well treat you like everyone else. His communication is always calm considering how cold he can be. He is willing to talk through whatever problem the two of you face. Even though some days he doesn’t feel like it.

Bi-Han has a sense of obsessiveness over you. He feels like he needs you twenty four seven but he will never show it. He’s still a little hasty on showing affection but trust that he feels it. He wants to show you but sometimes it’s hard given how he is as a person. It has nothing to do with you, it’s him. Bi-Han will always try with you. Sometimes he can get a little pissy with you but you know how to handle him so it never gets blown out of proportion. The two of you are the best when you are together.

General Shao [ ESTP - entrepreneur ]

Chemistry : 83%

Relationship Type : Supervisor

Shared Value : Pragmatic

Communication Style : Inductive

In a relationship, Shao will lead, guide, and protect. He will make sure you are alright. Make sure that no obstacles stand in your way. He will always make sure you are making the right decisions. He wants what’s best for you. He will protect you with his life. Nobody will dare threaten his queen. Nobody. Shao feels that you are his very weakness. (And to him this man has no weaknesses.) Sometimes he hates it. He hates the way you make him feel.

Shao will make people bow to you. Will make people worship the ground you walk on. He will not stand for anyone to treat you horribly. Unfortunately, the communication in your relationship is undoubtedly horrid. Shao does not know how to speak to you or confess his feelings which leads into fights. At the end of the day, Shao will always make sure you are safe.

Geras [ ISTJ - logistician ]

Chemistry : 82%

Relationship Type : Eye opening

Shared Value : Systematic

Communication Style : Reductive

In a relationship, Geras will show you nothing but kindness and compassion. You are not kind to yourself. He knows this. He will show you how to treat yourself. He will show you what you truly deserve. He will not back down even when it gets hard. He will stand by your side and help you experience the feeling.

It is not just yourself but to other people you have a hard time expressing your compassion to. Not to worry, Geras will help you. He will show you how to be kind, gentle, and caring to others. When you do, it makes you feel better about yourself. Geras will always be there for everything. Even if your communication can be a little off, he will still show you the way.

Johnny Cage [ ESTP - entrepreneur ]

Chemistry : 83%

Relationship Type : Supervisor

Shared Value : Pragmatic

Communication Style : Inductive

In a relationship, Johnny’s ultimate goal is to make you laugh. He doesn’t care what the situation is. If you’re upset or if you’re happy as can be. He will always try to make you feel better. He can’t stand when you’re sad. He can’t stand when something bothers you so he likes to take away everything that makes you feel bad about yourself with laughter.

Unfortunately, sometimes Johnny claims you are too serious for him and you claim he is too childish for you. Sometimes the communication isn’t really there but Johnny is willing to put aside all that because he loves you. Johnny loves showering you with gifts and telling you how “hot” you are. You’re perfect to him. His little movie star.

Havik [ ISFP - adventurer ]

Chemistry : 92%

Relationship Type : Consigliere

Shared Value : Pragmatic

Communication Style : Analytical

In a relationship, Havik’s more chaotic nature ceases when he is with you. It is always an interesting experience being with him but you don’t mind it. He gets to show you his way and you will show him yours. Two different worlds colliding may be overwhelming but Havik will be grateful for the experience.

Havik wants to show you what life is all about. He wants to show you adventure. He wants you to experience his world and his thinking. He wants you to understand him because he feels like nobody really does. As long as you let him, he will love you like he’s never loved anybody before.

Kenshi Takahashi [ INTJ - architect ]

Chemistry : 98%

Relationship Type : Twinflame

Shared Value : Intellectual

Communication Style : Speculative

In a relationship, Kenshi will always be there for you no matter what. Kenshi will be the one that will never go away. Even if you are at your lowest. Even when everything feels pointless. Even if you two fight. There is no driving Kenshi away. The two of you will figure it out. He’s determined on that. He will die on the hill every time. The two of you are so similar that you click every time you are around.

Every time he kisses you, it’s like fireworks. You are more to him than a girlfriend. You are his best friend. Someone that is deeply sewed into his soul. He will never run away from the feeling he has when he’s with you. Never will back down. He accepts who you are completely. With all your faults and all your hardships. You are a hard person to love but not to Kenshi. To Kenshi, you are the only one he can love.

Kuai Liang [ ISTJ - logistician ]

Chemistry : 82%

Relationship Type : Eye opening

Shared Value : Systematic

Communication Style : Reductive

In a relationship, Kuai Liang always wants the best for you. He will do anything if it means it is for your best interest. Protecting you is something he does not take lightly. With everything in his being, Kuai Liang will protect you. He will make sure you are fine emotionally and physically.

It will always be you. Nobody else. Some people may find this rather annoying by Kuai Liang but he doesn’t care. Protecting you is all that matters to him. He can’t stand when he sees you upset. He’ll break down with you when he sees this. He’ll always try to comfort you as best as he can.

Kung Lao [ ENFP - campaigner ]

Chemistry : 82%

Relationship Type : Coach

Shared Value : Abstract

Communication Style : Impassionate

In a relationship, Kung Lao wants nothing more than to make you feel good about yourself. He knows it’s hard for you. You are not in tune with yourself but he will help with that. Kung Lao makes you feel beautiful every time he’s with you. He makes you feel special. He will make you feel like you are the only one that matters to him. Like you are the only one that is important.

The communication you two have is always filled with passion and great emotion. Kung Lao will never talk bad about you. Even if he is mad at you. He knows you. He knows you cannot handle the harsh words because he knows you believe all the negative things you think of yourself or other people have said about you. He will not stand for it.

Liu Kang [ ISFJ - defender ]

Chemistry : 81%

Relationship Type : Analyst

Shared Value : Systematic

Communication Style : Reductive

In a relationship, Liu Kang will try to protect your peace. You are an over thinker and tend to always believe that everything will turn to worse. He’ll always try to take away any stress that is on your shoulders. One thing he does hate is your guy’s communication. Sometimes you are not comfortable with talking about your feelings and Liu Kang absolutely cannot stand it. He understands giving you your space but not speaking to him when you feel down or something is wrong drives him crazy. Liu Kang’s wit always charms you and makes you laugh because he’s not over the top with it.

Liu Kang is always patient with you. Especially with your strong emotions. You are emotionally reactive with everything but it is something he can handle. Sometimes when it become far too much, he’ll hold you in his arms and whisper how much he loves you. He’ll make you feel like you’re the only woman in the world. He truly wants you to feel loved with every fiber in his being. Because you don’t like to talk about your feelings, he is always analyzing your body language and your speech to see if you are alright. If he deems you are not, expect a long talk of how much he loves you.

Raiden [ INFJ - advocate ]

Chemistry : 91%

Relationship Type : Advisor

Shared Value : Abstract

Communication Style : Speculative

In a relationship, Raiden will try and be the man you want him to be. He’ll be the man you always thought of in your head. He’ll make your dream man a reality. Raiden will always try to guide you to the right choices in life. He wants you to succeed. Your communication is always interesting. It is neither bad or good. Your goals are a little ways from each other but Raiden will always support you. No matter what.

When you feel like a mess, Raiden is there whispering in your ear how much he loves you. How important you are. He will make you feel like you are the most important person in the world. He wants you to see yourself how he sees you. He looks to you like you are his prize possession. Like you are his world. There’s no amount of anything that can change the way Raiden feels about you. Nothing in the world.

Rain [ INFP - mediator ]

Chemistry : 82%

Relationship Type : Supporter

Shared Value : Abstract

Communication Style : Analytical

In a relationship, Rain shows you nothing but respect and support. He is your number one support system. In everything, he will help you succeed. Respect is another thing he does not take lightly. You are his goddess, his queen. He will treat you like he needs to worship the ground you walk on.

He’ll always support your ideas and beliefs. Even though most of the time he does not agree with them. In the slightest. He knows that supporting you is more important than him trying to push his ideas and or beliefs onto you. Your needs matter and he understands this. Rain will also allow you to call him by his first name. You are one of the only people to have this privilege so know that Rain means well.

Reiko [ ISTJ - logistician ]

Chemistry : 82%

Relationship Type : Eye opening

Shared Value : Systematic

Communication Style : Reductive

In a relationship, Reiko sees that there is more to life than himself when he is with you. He is a very selfish individual. Not when it comes to you though. He’s learning to put his significant other before him. He has to in order for the relationship to work. Otherwise the relationship is doomed as you can also be quite a selfish individual.

Reiko will try to give you gifts because he is not familiar with any other way of showing his affection. The two of you will have to teach each other how to love one another. It’s a rocky start but Reiko will get the hang of it. The relationship means so much more to him than you could ever realize.

Shang Tsung [ ENTP - debater ]

Chemistry : 81%

Relationship Type : Preceptor

Shared Value : Intellectual

Communication Style : Impassionate

In a relationship, Shang Tsung will put your needs above all. This is strange for the sorcerer as he is used to being selfish. It is not something he is familiar with but he can’t help himself. The more you’re around him the more he has this sense of urgency to try and give you the world.

Shang Tsung will always make sure you are well taken care of before going off doing his business. One thing about him is you will need to support his plans. Whatever they be, he needs someone by his side. Your goals usually align with each other and are smart. Your conversations are usually filled with great emotion and it’s something he can’t pull away from.

Syzoth [ ISFP - adventurer ]

Chemistry : 92%

Relationship Type : Consigliere

Shared Value : Pragmatic

Communication Style : Analytical

In a relationship, Syzoth wants you to feel like he is your home. He knows how it feels to be unwanted. He wants to shield you from that feeling. Nothing in the world matters more to him than you feeling safe. He cannot have you feeling down or feeling unsure. You need to be indefinitely secured.

He does not play any games. Syzoth will always try to advise you on what to do but will make it very clear that he is not trying to control the shape of your destiny. Whatever you desire, he is pleased with. He just doesn’t want you to regret anything or live in the past. Syzoth will make sure you feel safe in the beauty that is you.

Tomas [ ISFJ - defender ]

Chemistry : 81%

Relationship Type : Analyst

Shared Value : Systematic

Communication Style : Reductive

In a relationship, Tomas will always be there when you break. He will always be there when you cry. He will always be there when you can’t find it in yourself to stand on your two feet. He is the glue to your soul. Tomas believes you are capable of doing anything but he knows that’s just something that’s hard for you to believe.

He’ll try to comfort you. To hold you. To kiss you. Sometimes it may not be something that’s physical that you need. Maybe it’s something that’s mental and Tomas will try his best to help you in that department. Seeing you break makes him break and he cannot live with himself knowing that if he didn’t try to help you, you would get worse.

if you’re an INTP then your soulmate is ENTJ

That means your perfect match for a soulmate is

BI-HAN / SUB-ZERO

Your perfect match for a best friend is

KENSHI TAKAHASHI

Here are runner ups that you could end up with (romantically)

(in order of best all the way down)

SYZOTH, BARAKA, HAVIK, RAIDEN, JOHNNY CAGE

FUN THINGS ABOUT INTP TO HELP YOU CONNECT MORE

INTPs are typically non smokers.

INTPs typically use dark humor.

INTPs usually are atheists.

INTPs are usually emotionally reactive people.

INTPs typically don’t consider themselves smart.

INTPs typically wear glasses.

INTPs usually don’t fear death.

INTPs usually watch horror movies.

INTPs typically have low self-worth.

INTPs are usually short tempered.

684 notes · View notes

flower-yi · 23 days

Text

Margaret's greeting to you is sweet.

She's the assistant Veritas took in three years ago, and hasn't left since. Most people applying to the position have ulterior motives—you glumly recall a specific student, because my goodness, they have little to no shame these days—but just one meeting with her made you sure she'd be 'the one'. Her unwavering yet gentle disposition was endearing, and despite Veritas's distrustful attitude, she got in anyways.

(You think it's one of the best decisions he's made.)

"Is there anything in the mail?" You ask, shutting the door behind you.

She hums, "No, not really."

"Really?" This surprises you. Usually, it's a race to contact him on anything new he's working on. "Veritas said he's expecting letters for that weapon he's finished working on. You know, the anti-planetary one?"

"Remind me what's... that, again?"

Margaret furrows her eyebrows. Maybe Veritas forgot to tell her. "Remember that project he's been working on for a long time? The weapon got sent in for a test-firing and it was successful. So, he's waiting for any correspondence from anyone who'd like to expand on it."

(You remember peeking into his office, once, wondering why he was up so late. He promised more than four hours ago that he'll join you in bed, but there was only a coldness to his side of the bed you'll never get accustomed to.

"I will be there in a couple minutes, my love," Veritas addressed you without lifting his gaze from the blueprints he's scribbling on. From the mess on his hands, it seems he's been working on it since tucking you in. "You may go to the bedroom yourself. It is unnecessary to wait on me."

Instead of listening to him, you entered his office with the door clicking behind you. Veritas's head lifted, lips parted and about to say something, but he stopped; adjusting his glasses.

You draped over him, meeting cold skin.

"What're you working on?" You asked, instead. His warmth soothed you. "Mmh... looks like it's important."

Veritas placed a hand on yours, raised to his lips to be kissed. Aeons, your little doctor was so warm. "This weapon... will be a magnum opus. One that will eventually serve its purpose, and will be recognized for years to come."

Even in the sleep-addled brain of yours, you knew it was important.

"Yeah?"

"Indeed. It will be a weapon that will..." Veritas suddenly fell silent, alarming you. He was quick to assure you with another kiss to your hand, "Do not be so concerned, my love. Either way, this weapon will be reaching its final stages soon."

You were nearing dreamland, at this point. You recall it well.

Though the mutter under his breath was ingrained in your brain:

"An anti-planetary weapon that will, hopefully, earn Nous's blessing this time...")

The spark of recognition appears, "Oh, that one!"

"You know it," you toss her a smile. "So, what's the status? I hope the Genius Society picks up one of his inventions this time. He's been looking forward to it ever since."

You take a moment to place the paper bags on the table, setting aside your bag on one of the chairs for visitors. It's well into the afternoon, classes are finished, and by Veritas's schedule, you're sure both are famished. It's strange he's not in his office at this time. You're never late with your visits, so perhaps it's likely you're early and Veritas is late.

He's probably finishing up the last lectures of the day somewhere.

"I feel the same," Margaret knows Veritas to an extent that falls closely to yours, and it's not hard to root for him the same way you do. It warms your heart to hear how Margaret holds him in high-esteem. "Mr. Ratio's one of the best, they'd be out of the minds to not induct him into the Society—oh, are those chicken wraps?"

The chicken wraps are steaming as you tear away the aluminium foil. "Yeah, I bought it for the two of you. Want one?" Her eager nod has a laugh huff out of you, so you hand it to her. You joke, "So hungry you nearly forgot, huh?"

"Yeah... where did you buy them?"

"It's near the university. There were so many students I had to fight for it..." Thankfully, one of the vendors pitied your nearly trampled self and gave you two on the house. You make a silent note to bring Veritas there to pay your debt. "...anyways, where were we?"

Margaret pauses, "Mr. Ratio's genius?"

Well, that's not what you were saying, but it's a part of the topic. "Yes, genius. Veritas is intelligent, of course. Speaking of genius, did the Genius Society send anything?"

Margaret's reaction to your question is strange. She freezes, chicken wrap just hovering in front of her mouth. Your inquisitive gaze snaps her out of her reverie, and when getting her bearings, she's avoiding your eyes. "Nothing... yet, of course. I've been watching the mail for a week already."

A week? The Genius Society's correspondence normally would not take so long. "Is there anything else in the mail?"

"No, not really," she nods her head.

Huh? The disconnect between her body language and words makes no sense at all. However, the soft smile on Margaret's lips takes the edge of the suspicion off. Why would she lie to your face, though? Unless something's happened, then...

You decide to say something else. "I see... perhaps there's some issue with the mailing system?"

"Maybe!" Margaret agrees too easily with you. Her voice went too high-pitched, smile exaggerated, then she changes the subject, "Have you eaten on the way here? It feels impolite to be the only one eating."

The sudden mention of manners has you laugh awkwardly. It's already strange enough she's avoiding a simple question like she is right now but the poor girl looks like she's about to burst with your incessant questioning of if there's anything in the mail .

Is it really so hard to answer?

"Yes, I did," you answer. Gesturing to her chicken wrap, you say, "So, go ahead and eat. It's alright."

When you turn your gaze away from her, it's as if Margaret breathes a sigh of relief. It's obvious even in the corner of your eye. For the three years she's been here, her knowledge on Veritas's projects would be better than yours. After all, it is something work related, and she deals with his correspondence to anyone on behalf of him.

If she's lying like this, then there must be a reason. A Veritas-shaped reason, indeed, because he's got a bad habit of concealing things when it comes to something.

Letting Margaret be, you take a seat on one of the chairs meant for guests. Veritas's office is a spacious one, with a small reception area for visitors to wait on him. The door to his office is by the left, the entrance to this space on the right, and Margaret's desk in the middle of the room with the lounge chairs lined up by the wall in front of her.

With this placement, it provides you a clear view of Veritas's door... and the light escaping below it.

He's here in his office and he didn't come out to greet you.

Several emotions rise up and simmer in you. Some of them are negative. Well. Most of them are, because the way alarm and concern starts to boil within you is too much.

You take a deep breath to sort your emotions first. Your feelings are negative, and worry takes the top of the list. There are some wisps of anger but it quickly melts into the emotion up top and you slowly realise that Veritas has not messaged you even once starting... 1700 system hours ago.

With your phone now in hand, you shoot him a message.

It's something to the effect of asking where he is. The loud ding! of his own phone seeps out of his office room, out into the reception, and into Margaret and yours' ears.

Guilt colours Margaret's face vibrantly.

"I can explain," she begins as you stand up, making your way to his office. Poor girl, she's been shocked out of savouring the chicken wrap you've bought. "He's— he needs some time to himself..."

It's something other than needing time to himself, you know it, you know .

You give her a rueful smile, "Is that why you told me there's no mail?"

Margaret... falls short on an answer. The diverting of her eyes to the floor tells you everything. The successful test-firing of that anti-planetary weapon was done a few weeks ago, and everyone in the know was scrambling to cover it. It was Veritas, after all, and his name—like every genius—is known across the star systems. It'd make no sense there was no mail, no nothing , to be sent to him.

You only hold on to that tiny, little hope that you're wrong and Veritas is too caught on rejoicing to have noticed your arrival.

Only a look of understanding could be given to her. To scream, to yell, to let everything burst on Margaret is counter-productive. Maybe, if you asked, she'd say that she was merely doing what she, as an academic assistant, should do.

(If it was some other situation, you'd say—to his face—that you were right about Margaret. You'd say to him she's the best academic assistant he's ever had.)

You barely spare Margaret any glance before opening the door to his office. Thousands of thoughts trickle into your brain now, ranging from is he okay? to I hope nothing's bad happened.

Every moment of you turning the knob to open feels like in slow motion. Your heart is racing, just every inkling sending you in a worry-filled tizzy, and you feel nearly paralyzed in the spot where you are right now.

You open the door, and pity and fear and just everything drops a cold bucket over you.

Veritas sits on the chair by his desk, a crumpled letter on the wood and his headpiece discarded somewhere off to the side.

You're sure he's heard you coming in.

"Veritas?"

He absentmindedly says, "You may enter."

Veritas's voice doesn't have the usual lilt it has. It does not carry around the room, nor does it have its self-assured cadence that comes from being a genius. He stares at the scenery outside his office window, as if too entranced with the way light leaves the sky to make way for the moon. The moon that merely borrows its lumination from the sun.

The door locks behind you with a click that seems to echo in the dreadfully silent office. Now, only your footsteps make noise while approaching him. You move like you're holding your breath, not wanting to startle an animal that's already on its last legs.

But it's Veritas. He's not some lowly animal, though you know his heart to be softer than anyone else would presume.

Leaned over him, you bring his face into your hands. He lets you so readily, not once making any smart comment about handling him like porcelain.

(You received such a comment, once, when doing so the first time. Before Margaret, it was you. It was so long ago you don't recall, but Veritas had turned to you for help in handling his interactions with the "outside world", he'd call it, and this time, he was busy with a project. Some prototype he'd been originally commissioned to make, though, without any second thoughts, turned down any offer of payment and instead asked that his name be "spread across the cosmos". You originally blanched at the credits the ruler of the planet was willing to drop for Veritas's involvement in their planet-wide security, but he easily brushed your surprise off. At that moment, you were sure that, to him, it was another day of putting his gifts to use. Another day of using his intelligence to aid in the prosperity of civilizations, as if it was nothing to boast about. "Do I seem to evoke some child-like energy to hold me like this?" Veritas questioned, a quizzical brow arched. There was nothing in his tone that suggested he disliked it to the point of abhorrence. If anything, he looked— curious as to why you'd hold him like this. Instead of answering that silent question, you cooed, "Oh, yes. A little baby, indeed! You're so adorable—" "That's enough," he interrupted. You couldn't help but laugh at his disgusted face. "While I appreciate the gesture, I ask you continue sorting through the letters that came through the mail if you are wasting your time like this." "You call this wasted time? I'm suddenly not allowed to hold my handsome boy like this." Veritas's eyes narrowed. "Cease calling me a 'handsome boy', and I will consider this time to be not of the 'wasted' sort." So, he didn't hate it then. You smiled. "You like it then, Veritas?" He fell silent, you recall. His eyes bore into yours, and for a moment, it seemed like he'd say no. Then Veritas turned his head, kissed your palm, and murmured, "If it's you... then, yes.")

You wonder if he can outright acknowledge it's you who's holding him this way. He seems so out of it that what gnaws at you says no, but you try. You try for him. "Veritas?" You say, again, redirecting his attention to you. His eyes follow his head's movement, but it drags, and it's like it's taking everything out of him to begin looking at you.

Faint recognition appears on his face, and his voice softens too much, unlike the usual way he addresses you, "...My apologies for not greeting you when you came. I was absorbed in my readings of a letter the IPC sent me. An invitation of some sorts..."

When you see his eyes, the world falls silent.

Oh, Aeons, his eyes. Its lost its sheen and barely looks like he's there at all.

Your heart aches. So, that's it, then.

"What did they invite you to, love?" You ask, caressing his cheeks.

Veritas breathes as if it takes so much out of him to say, “The Intelligentsia Guild.”

“Ah,” You hum, willing the sadness away from your features. This moment is about Veritas, not you. “I see. You think I should reply to them, instead?”

The shake of Veritas’s head is slow. The hand he raises to envelop over yours is warm, yet you cannot find yourself to find comfort in it. “It is… better than nothing, love.”

The sight of Veritas blurs.

And, of course, out of everything, he notices you.

"You're crying," Veritas whispers softly. He reaches over and attempts to wipe away the tears streaming down, trying to soothe you. "Am I the cause of your tears? Then, I apologize. For... for being such a failure in front of you. Nous has not deemed me enough." You hadn't realized your eyes beginning to water; a single tear brought on a waterfall.

Aeons, you want to beat him ten times over. "You're not supposed to say sorry, Veritas. I'm... I'm only so worried about you."

Veritas meets eyes with you, and knows that it's not enough to cover the defeat. The disappointment surrounding his head like clouds, blurring every aspect of himself that he thought himself to be worthy of Nous' gaze.

He looks tired; an exhaustion that drills into his bones and something far beyond you. You think he's feeling the countless hours he's poured into that weapon, the surge of ambition and dedication used to fuel his drive, and the beginning of something chipping away at him and you don't know what.

(It scares you. It scares you because Veritas shoulders too many burdens he should have given to you to share.)

"You're the best scholar I’ve ever met, Veritas,“ You tell him, pushing past the tears that line your face. ”The smartest I’ve ever seen. Have you known your intelligence was the part of you that pulled me towards you? Your genius is unparalleled, my love. There is no one else I can think of if, ever, someone asks me about the most astute person I know.“

Does he think they are empty compliments? Because Veritas merely says, “Your words are better suited to a man whose Nous’ gaze fell upon him.”

You fall silent, defeated. What are you supposed to say? Are you to tell him that Nous does not matter, when his life is centered around knowledge? What is someone to do in this situation? What is comfort to a man who has been seared beyond recognition by an Aeon whom he worships?

“It is not hopeless,” Someone speaks, and you take a moment to recognize that it is you who has spoken. “Will you let an Aeon define who you are, Veritas?”

Veritas’s eyes slip close, and his forehead rests against yours. There is nothing but your soft sniffling, the steady breathing of your lover, and the persistent ticking of the clock in his office that sounds off. It is quiet and chilling, as if waiting for some bomb to tick off to end this moment once and for all.

His eyelids flutter, reddish-pink eyes peeking through—some brightness have returned, but not enough.

Veritas replies, “I… will try not to let them define me.”

To you, that is enough.

(You know than more that he will take this moment, and let it haunt him.)

#—stellaronhvnters.#veritas ratio #dr ratio #honkai star rail #veritas ratio x reader #dr ratio x reader #honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #hanyi-writing #kinda my love letter to ratio?#he makes me sad in the way that i understand him? kinda?#i mean. i'm in no way smart but that character story part 3 of his #hit me in a way i was like. gods. i understand you.

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thewintersoldierdisaster · 21 days

Text

a/n: anon(s)! baby fic is here!! apologies for the wait but it’s long and i hope it’s worth it ☺️ honestly this fic feels like total chaos but i kind of love the vibes. not too much to say other than this was fun to write and i think we’re done on svechnikov baby birth fics lol

word count: 6.4k

tw: mentions of labor, brief innuendo, post partum anxiety (not diagnosed in fic)

summary: it’s time for baby svechnikov number four to make their entrance into the world and of course it’s chaos in the best possible way

“Mama!” Alina shrieks for your attention and your heart skips a beat at her volume, mild fight or flight kicking in before you catch sight of her in the doorway and see that she’s fine.

“Christ,” you mutter to yourself, heartbeat returning to normal. The baby gives a violent kick to your kidney and you wince. “Sorry, bub,” you pat the side of your stomach, “that hit of adrenaline couldn’t have been fun.”

Alina shouts for you again and you level her with a stern look, “hey, what did Mama tell you about shouting like that?”

You’re too pregnant to be gentle parenting, but if you don’t remind Alina about her indoor voice, she’ll just run rampant over the next few months while you’re completely distracted with the new baby. She shuffles her feet and pulls at the little ruffles on the sides of her bathing suit.

“No shoutin’ unless someone’s bleeding or really, really sick,” she sighs and when you nod, she perks up with a toothy little grin. “But I had to shout ‘cause Papa says your frone is ready!”

“My frone?” You repeat, brows scrunched together in confusion. You repeat the word a few times under your breath until it clicks. “Oh! My throne?”

Alina nods and does a little wiggle, bouncing on her feet. “Come on, mama! We wanna show you!” She’s definitely still shouting, but your middle daughter has never understood the concept of an inside voice.

You smile at her and laugh, “okay, mama’s coming, Alya. Remember I’m very slow.” You brace one hand at your lower back, the other hand rubbing at the side of your distended belly. As scary as it is, you’re glad that you’re being induced tomorrow - your entire body is sore and your back and hips are killing you from carrying around this giant Svechnikov baby. Your actual due date isn’t for another week, but since baby’s measuring so big, your ob/gyn made the call for a scheduled induction.

“Mama’s like a tuuuurtle,” she grins slyly, skipping back to the yard and leaving you shaking your head.

As soon as you get to the back door, you can feel the mid-August Raleigh heat and humidity, sweat already prickling at your hairline and armpits. You frown, already uncomfortable and not really in the mood to go outside. Leaving the air conditioning is going to be miserable, but the girls were begging you to join them and Andrei outside, so how could you resist. You scrape your hair back into a knot on top of your head, trying to keep as much of it off your neck as possible. Little pieces fall out anyway and curl with the humidity.

You wedge your feet into the pair of Adidas slides at the back door and step carefully over the lip onto the back patio. The heat hits instantly and you frown, cranky. The baby jabs an elbow into your side and you wince - there’s absolutely no room left in your stomach and every time the baby moves, you’re painfully reminded of that. You hadn’t even realized your stomach could stretch this much, but baby number four is testing the limits.

“Maaaaamaaaaa!” Alina and Kira shriek for you in stereo and you wave from the door, reluctant to go outside into the heat.

“Mama’s coming,” you call back, bracing a hand under the curve of your belly and waddling farther out onto the patio. The air feels like soup and you have no idea how Andrei and the girls are so energetic. Before you can make it a handful of feet, Andrei’s at your side, kissing your temple and wrapping an arm around your waist. “Hi,” you murmur.

“Hi,” he smiles down at you, looking a little tired. His face is bright pink too, which you had warned him would happen. “Off to your throne, solnyshka.”

You let him guide you over the grass, avoiding the lawn toys and stray Barbie dolls that litter the ground. You’re perfectly capable of walking on your own, but it’s nice to lean your weight against Andrei’s side and have him help you. “Did you reapply sunscreen?” You ask, knowing the answer. Besides his face, his shoulders, chest, and arms are all tinged pink too.

He wrinkles his face at you. “I think once? I’m fine,” he shrugs and stops in front of your throne.

It’s one of your beach chairs settled in front of the girls’ old baby pool, an umbrella stuck in the grass behind the chair.

You grin at Andrei as the girls sprint up and dance around you.

“Do you love it, Mom?” Evie bounces excitedly on her toes. “That way you can watch us play!”

“I love it!” You cup Evie’s cheek in one hand, ruffling Alina’s hair with the other. “This is the best throne ever, you guys are making me feel so special.”

“Only the best for our koroleva,” Andrei winks at you, hoisting Kira up onto his hip when she starts tugging at the hem of his swim trunks. She grins her little toddler grin at you and then whispers in Andrei’s ear, a chubby little hand splayed on his cheek. He nods seriously and says, “yes, Mama will watch you go down the slide.”

You laugh and lower yourself into the chair, your lower back popping and protesting. A little groan slips past your lips and all four of your watchdogs whip their heads in your direction. The girls have wide eyed looks on their faces and you offer up a comforting smile, “sorry, girls. Mama’s okay, remember it’s hard for me to sit so low.”

A brief bout of Braxton Hicks two weeks earlier had taken you by surprise and your startled yelp and the way you had doubled over from the shock had scared the girls a little, so they’re insanely keyed into any weird noise you make lately.

“Why don’t you get Mama’s drink?” Andrei sets Kira back on her feet and nudges the three of them off with his hands. After they skip off, Andrei helps you swing your legs up and over so your feet kick in the cool water in the baby pool.

You sigh happily, dropping your head back, “oh god, that feels good. It’s hotter than Satan’s ass crack out here.”

The baby kicks, the outline of a little foot visible through the taut skin on your stomach, as if agreeing with you.

Andrei scratches at his jaw, rasping his fingers through a couple of days’ worth of stubble. “It’s not so bad, when you have the girls spraying you with the hose every two minutes,” he laughs a little, squatting down next to you and shaking his head so stray droplets of water fly off of his hair. Your face crinkles up and you swat at him, giggling. He taps at the side of your stomach, hand warm against your skin. “The little one is behaving?”

“In the loosest sense of the word,” you sigh, shifting in the chair, trying to get comfortable. “I’m kind of ready to get my lung capacity back.”

His hands stroke over the swell of your stomach, the baby’s arms and legs following Andrei’s touch. You pluck at the white linen fabric of your dress where it’s stuck to your skin with sweat, regretting the choice of clothing. “Tell me when you want to go inside,” Andrei says. “Girls will be fine if you’re not watching the water war.”

You hum, swishing your feet in the water. “A little vitamin D is probably good for me,” your smirk matches Andrei’s when the double entendre is out in the air. It’s been a minute since you had Andrei inside of you, too uncomfortable for the exertion, and you miss having him that way. The horny days of your second trimester are long in the rearview mirror.

Before he can say anything, the girls come running from the house, ice rattling around in the Stanley that Evie’s got clutched in her arms. You grin at the sight - your oldest leading the charge with her younger sisters following dutifully behind. Evie unceremoniously drops the cup on your lap with a chirpy, “here, Mama! Daddy even added lemon for you.”

“Oh, my favorite,” you reach out to tug on one of Evie’s braided pigtails and she beams at you before dancing away, Alina hot on her heels. Kira presses her little body up against your thigh and looks at you with puppy eyes. “What’s the matter, Kiry?”

“I have?” She asks, pointing at your Stanley.

You nod and hold the cup out for her, straw pointed in her direction. She plants her hands on the metal and chews a little on the straw while she sucks back more water than you expected. Andrei laughs a little when she gulps down the water, releasing the straw with a heavy sigh and then runs off, shrieking for her sisters.

“Adding another one to this chaos is going to be wild,” he comments, leaning back and splashing his hand in the pool water, hitting your shins with little droplets.

“Poor number four is either going to be the loudest to be heard or the quietest with three big sisters talking for them,” you giggle, tracing your fingers over the engraved 37 on the Stanley - the WAG Christmas gift that keeps on giving. You get a particularly painful kick to the ribs and wince, muttering, “maybe that first option.”

“Dadddeeeeeee!” A trio of shrieks echo across the yard, the girls calling for Andrei to rejoin them. He stands up and presses a kiss to the crown of your head.

“Duty calls,” he gives you a little salute and jogs off, leaving you to enjoy the way his ass fills out his bathing suit. It’s a view that never gets old, but even better is watching Andrei chase the girls around and play with them, matching grins on all four of their faces. He chases them through the sprinklers - if those have been on all morning, your water bill is going to be through the roof - and lets them splash him, pretending to get scared. He watches while the two older girls clamber up the side of the small inflatable water slide you’d ordered back in June when it was obvious that the majority of the summer was going to be spent in Raleigh, with the girls running loose in the backyard.

Kira stays at the bottom, in the splash zone, shrieking happily when Evie and Alina zip down the slide and hit her with water.

It’s honestly the best thing you’ve ever bought - the Nečas kids have been over for play dates at least once a week to run wild in the water and you’ve had a ton of the other guys and their families over for barbecues and parties. Now, you’re just glad it’ll keep your girls occupied while you relax.

After you’ve been outside for an hour or so, you call them all back so you and Andrei can reapply sunscreen to the girls’ pink little faces and shoulders. Andrei gets his own healthy dose of sunscreen, even though it’s too late for him to avoid the sunburn on his face, chest, and shoulders. You make a mental note to throw a bottle of aloe into the fridge when you get inside.

“I hate this, Mama!” Alina whines, bouncing from foot to foot while you try to cover her face in Baby Coppertone. “It’s yucky and sticky and I don’t want it!”

“If you don’t let me reapply,” you huff, out of breath from trying to keep her still between your knees and your severely diminished lung capacity, “your skin is going to turn pink and hurt.”

“I want pink skiiiin!” Alina howls, dodging your sunscreen covered hands and running off, her face a little mask of white from the lotion you hadn’t been able to rub in properly. She disappears into the playhouse and you roll your eyes, giving up completely. You’re too exhausted to fight her and tomorrow’s sunburn will be a problem for the babysitting grandparents while you push out the bowling ball baby laying on your bladder.

Behind you, Andrei laughs and teases you, “just like her Mama, that one.”

“Absolutely not,” you grumble, holding out your hands to him so he can pull you to your feet. “I’m literally so quiet and agreeable.”

“Maybe when you’re sleeping,” Andrei scoffs, helping you step out of the pool. His palm finds the side of your stomach like a magnet, fingers spread over the swell protectively. “Otherwise, you’re stubborn like a bull.” He pauses, smirks. “And loud.”

“You’re terrible,” you mutter, waddling as fast as you can to the bathroom. “Bullying the woman who’s carrying your fourth giant baby.”

Andrei’s voice carries through the bathroom door as you shut it behind you, “this is only the second big baby! The other two were normal sized.”

Later, when it’s far past your bedtime and you still can’t sleep with excitement and nerves swirling low in your belly, you whisper into the dark of your bedroom, “Drei? Are you awake?”

It takes a second, but eventually he replies, “depends.”

“On what?” You reply quietly, shifting and bending your leg so you can open up your hip a little and relieve some of the uncomfortableness. Kira curls closer to you, one arm draped over your stomach, the thumb of her other hand wedged firmly in between her lips. She looks even more like a baby while she sleeps, long eyelashes fluttering against the tops of her cheeks, and you start to feel emotion clogging your throat. Her last night of being the family’s baby. You hadn’t had the heart to put her back in her own bed when she came wandering in a few hours ago.

“On what you need from me,” Andrei’s voice is clouded with sleep, but you see and feel him roll onto his side so he’s facing you.

You stick your tongue out at him lightly. “Last night as a family of five,” you murmur. “Any final guesses - fourth girl or first boy?”

“Girl,” Andrei replies on a yawn, reaching his hand out and over Kira to rub at your belly. “Belly looks the same as it did with all three, just bigger.”

He’s not wrong, but, “agreed. But only because I think my nose spread out again like with the girls.”

“You’re just as beautiful as always,” Andrei says.“Your nose looks the same too.”

You’re convinced he’s lying, but there’s no point in arguing now.

“Think we’ll see bub tomorrow or will it be a couple of days?” You yawn, exhausted but wired. You can’t decide if you have to pee or if it’s just the pressure of the baby.

“Tomorrow,” Andrei laughs a little, “if the kid knows what’s good for her.”

You yawn again and Andrei tells you to get some rest, “it’s going to be a busy few days, solnyshka.”

Somehow you manage to fall asleep and then it’s induction day, a hectic morning consisting of four grandparents showing up and three little girls bouncing around asking if their baby is coming yet. You’re overwhelmed by the time Andrei helps you into the passenger seat of the Navigator, kissing you gently.

“Calm, my love,” he murmurs against your lips, rubbing at your stomach. “We know what to do, right?”

You nod, “right.” Wrapping your fingers in the neck of his t-shirt, you tug Andrei back in for another kiss. “Let’s go have a baby!”

Twelve hours later, you’re dripping in sweat, contractions gripping your stomach every thirty seconds with regularity. Andrei’s eaten lunch, dinner, and then a second dinner around 8:30. You, on the other hand, are on your ninth cup of ice chips and are dying for something that will actually fill you up.

You hold out your hand for Andrei’s when another contraction starts and he lets you crunch his fingers together while you breathe through it. “More ice?” He asks, brushing frizzy, damp strands of hair off your forehead.

“No,” you huff, slumping back against the pillows. “I never want to see an ice chip again. The second this kid pops out, I need you to get me a party platter of sushi, I don’t care what time it is.”

Andrei laughs and promises that he’ll get you whatever you want.

After that, it’s a blur. The contractions are nonstop, your ob/gyn between your legs encouraging you to push, and Andrei’s arm braced around your upper back to give you some leverage.

“Okay, I see some hair,” your doctor says. “Big head, but one push and it should be out. Then we’ve got a baby!”

Andrei murmurs encouraging words in your ear that you barely hear over the rush of blood in your head and the guttural scream that forces out of your throat. You scream and cry and there’s pressure and then release as the baby slides out.

You’re allowed to slump back against the pillows, tears streaming down your face while you crane your neck to see the baby, “is the baby healthy? Is she okay?”

“He’s just perfect,” your doctor beams, holding the baby up. “It’s a boy, mom and dad!”

Her words sink in and you start sobbing - a little boy!

Your husband’s big hand is cradled over your head and the baby’s on your chest, bloody and scrunched up and crying. Your own hands automatically come up to cradle him, your lips pressing against the top of his head. “A boy! Oh my god, Drei, a little boy,” you sob to him, laughing into Andrei’s mouth when he kisses you.

“I’m so proud of you,” he says shakily, his cheeks wet. “A son. Solnyshka, thank you. He’s - thank you. Fuck, I love you so much.”

Andrei’s hand comes up to cover yours on the baby’s back and you’re jolted by how warm his hand is compared to yours, you’re shaking and freezing, but all you can focus on is how happy you are.

The baby’s cries taper off and he nuzzles against your chest, your heart melting at how perfect and adorable he is.

“He looks like the girls,” Andrei comments, unable to stop staring. His fingers stroke over the baby’s back, your own trembling with the adrenaline come down.

You laugh. “They all look like you, babe. My genes never stood a chance,” you can’t stop smiling, pressing your lips all over the baby’s head. He’s so warm against your chest.

You’re not sure how long you get to keep the baby on your chest, but the next thing you know, you’re in recovery, dozing while you watch Andrei hold his son. The baby is a big one, like you’d expected, weighing in at a sold nine pounds, eleven ounces. Your entire lower body is still throbbing with pain, but it’s all so worth it to see Andrei with the baby cradled in his arms.

“Four kids and I still can’t believe he’s real,” Andrei chuckles hoarsely, gazing down at the baby with shiny eyes.

“Oh, I can believe it,” you reply dryly, shifting with a wince. “I feel like we should’ve been more prepared with boy names.”

You’d run through the list of the few that you had liked, but none seem right. His middle name will be for Andrei, but the first name is stumping you both.

“We’ll figure it out,” Andrei looks up at you with a grin. “I love you so much, I said that, right?”

“Several times,” you hold out your arms and wiggle your fingers at him. “Give me back my baby, Drei.”

Andrei transfers the baby to you with the ease of a practiced parent, taking a seat on the edge of your bed. You’re both exhausted and it’s so early in the morning the sun isn’t even up yet. You’ll have to pass out soon, but right now you can’t get enough of the infant. He looks so much smaller when he was in Andrei’s arms. You trace over the slope of his nose with the tip of your index finger, seeing so much of the girls and Andrei in his features. “You sure you don’t want to name him after your dad?” You ask, double checking.

“No, no,” Andrei shakes his head. “Geno has that covered. Besides,” his lips twist up in an impish little smile, “Igor’s not my favorite name.”

You know he’s thinking about the Canes’ most recent loss to the Rangers in the second round of the playoffs. The Rangers getting swept in the ECF had been extremely satisfying in your house.

You giggle a little and watch as the baby yawns. He’s been quiet, sleeping on and off, so much more peaceful than his older sisters. “Okay, I get it. You know, my grandfather, his name was Demetrius. A few letter changes…Dimitri?”

Andrei’s knuckle brushes against the soft pudge of the baby’s cheeks and murmurs the name. “Dimitri,” it sounds so different, so much better in his accent, “Dimka.”

He yawns in your arms and it feels like something clicks into place in your chest. You nod at Andrei, “that’s it. That’s his name.”

“Dimitri Andreievich,” Andrei laughs as he says the name. “Big name for a little boy.”

“He’s almost ten pounds,” you scoff. “This is a gift from the Big Boy genes, oh husband of mine.”

He smirks at you, leaning in for a kiss and your poor battered vagina gives a weak throb of pain. It’s too soon for him to be this adorable.

After a solid three hours of sleep, broken up once so you can try feeding Dimitri, you start pestering Andrei for your sushi. It’s nearing eight in the morning on the nineteenth, making it nearly twenty-four hours since you had breakfast with the girls before coming to the hospital.

“What about anything else?” He frowns at you. “Sushi for breakfast is…” He trails off, wrinkling his face in disgust.

With the baby latched to a nipple, you pout at him. “Did I or did I not push your giant child out of my body?” You pause to inhale and then continue, “And! Since it was already this morning before someone thought to feed me, all I’ve eaten in twenty four hours is ice chips and a peanut butter sandwich. I am starving!”

Andrei laughs at you, but before he can answer, gets distracted by his phone vibrating in his pocket. It’s probably Elena, looking for an update since you hadn’t called anyone in the early hours after Dimitri had been born, exhausted and looking to soak in the time as a trio. You turn your attention to the baby while Andrei chats in Russian on the phone. He hangs up and sits down on the edge of the bed, wrapping his hand around your knee. “Mama says the girls are going wild, waiting to hear about their new baby,” he grins toothily. “Can sushi wait? I think maybe I’ll go get the girls to introduce them to their brother.”

“Natives are restless?” You ask, the guilt of being away from the girls, even for a day, even to literally give birth, starting to creep in. Tears well in your eyes and you don’t bother to do anything about it, knowing you’re going to be a weepy mess for the foreseeable future. “How do you feel about meeting the big sisters, D?”

Dimitri lets out a soft little baby squeak and you give Andrei a watery grin. “I think he likes that plan. Bring me my girls.”

In the time that Andrei’s gone, Dimitri naps in his little plastic bassinet and you get helped into the bathroom by your nurse, ready to sit with the girls as long as their attention spans can handle it. You brush your hair back into a neater braid and wash your face clean of sweat. By the time that Andrei texts that he’s parking, you feel a little more human.

You can hear little footsteps running down the hall and you rub a hand over Dimitri’s belly, “get ready for Hurricane Svechnikova, bub.”

“Mama!” Evie bursts through the door first, hair in two pigtails on the top of her head and a bright red tutu around her waist. You beam at the sight of her and open your arms.

“Hi, bunny,” you coo, emotions clogging up your throat. “Come give me a hug!”

She dances over to your side and clambers up on the bed, nearly smacking you in the face with a piece of construction paper and jostling you a little painfully. You wrap her up in a tight hug, inhaling her little-kid scent of markers and Johnson and Johnson shampoo. Over her shoulder, you see Alina skip into the room and you hold open one arm.

“My Alya,” you grin. “Come join Mama.”

She’s in a Canes giveaway t-shirt that you’d cut down so it wasn’t a literal dress on her and you briefly wonder how wild they were being if this is how they ended up dressed. Alina needs a little help getting up on the bed and as Evie is pulling at the back of her shirt, Andrei appears at the door, Kira on his hip and an exasperated frown on his face.

“Didn’t Papa tell you not to run?” He raises an eyebrow at the older girls cuddled against your sides.

“We missed Mama,” Evie replies, pouting. You smooth a hand over her hair and shake your head at Andrei. They don’t need a parenting moment right now. Kira wiggles in his arms and reaches for you until Andrei relents and settles her on your lap in a way that doesn’t cause you pain. None of the girls have even so much as looked at the baby, but you’re not rushing them, knowing it’s a big change for them.

Andrei settles on the little couch while the girls fill you in on all the fun they had with the grandparents yesterday. They make Andrei bring you the bag of pictures they drew for you and the baby and that seems to trigger them. “Oh! Wait, Mama,” Evie perks up and looks around, “where’s the baby?”

You laugh and point at the plastic bassinet, “your little brother is right there. Just waiting to meet you three.”

Like it was rehearsed, all three of them scramble to the side of the bed to get a good look at Dimitri.

“He’s a boy?” Alina asks, squinting down at him.

“We have a brother? Not a sister?” Evie carefully reaches a hand into the bassinet to touch one of Dimitri’s tiny feet. “I thought it was a sister.”

“Baby!” Kira pats the edge of the plastic. “Baby in Mama’s belly?”

You kiss the back of her head. “Yeah, this is the baby that was in Mama’s tummy. His name is Dimitri.”

Andrei comes over to lift Kira and Alina into his arms so they can get a better look at the baby. “It’s different, right, to have a brother?” He asks, looking at you softly. You know he wouldn’t have cared if the baby were a girl, but there’s something about men and their sons, and you’re beyond happy that you were able to give him that.

“He’s not going to do much for a while,” you say. “But when he gets moving, I bet you’re all going to have a lot of fun.”

“Mmm,” Evie hums thoughtfully. “Boys are kinda yucky.”

“I’m a boy!” Andrei gasps, mock offended. “Am I yucky?”

You shoot him a wicked smile over Evie’s head and mouth ‘filthy’ at him, surprised that you even have it in you to flirt with him. Andrei laughs, his eyes sparkling, and you both nearly miss it when Evie chirps, “yeah, ‘cause sometimes you’re smelly after hockey.”

You snort a laugh and then, sensing that he’s missing some kind of party, Dimitri stirs, making little noises and wiggling his arms and legs. The girls watch, fascinated, and you skirt around Evie so you can pick him up. You glance at the clock on the wall and it’s been close to two and a half hours since you fed him, so he’s probably hungry. He starts to fuss more and the girls look a little disgruntled by the noise, so before they start complaining, you pucker up and plant a smacking kiss to Evie’s cheek, making her giggle. “How about Papa brings you guys back home so you can play and don’t have to watch me change any stinky diapers? Then you can come back later with Nana and Pop and Babu and Dedu? You can introduce them all to your new brother,” you grin, adding more excitement and animation to your tone so they’ll get excited too.

“You’re sure?” Andrei asks, even as your two middle kids are fighting in his arms, chattering at each other over who touched who. He’d scooped them off the bed as soon as Alina started poking at Kira to see how close she could get the former baby of the family to the edge of the bed without pushing her off. The noise they’re making is starting to agitate Dimitri and you’re very sure. Andrei himself looks a little frazzled with the girls practically shrieking in his ears.

“Go ahead,” you widen your eyes at him. “We’ll, ah, we’ll do a little more sibling bonding later in the day. D and I aren’t going anywhere.”

Andrei looks conflicted about leaving you, but honestly, Alina and Kira’s fighting is starting to give you a little bit of a headache. Dimitri is fussing more and you don’t want to start feeding him with the girls in the room because that opens up all the “whys” and “what are you doings” that the girls are so prone to these days.

Evie’s tucked against your side, looking down at the baby. She sighs and looks up at Andrei, “he’s so loud. Let’s come back when he’s quiet.”

Andrei’s mouth tips up in a half smile and you manage a weak laugh, reflexively holding out a hand to guide Evie when she half rolls, half climbs off the bed and beelines for the door. She waves over her shoulder and chirps a blithe, “bye Mommy, bye baby brother.”

“I think she’s expecting you to follow her,” you say to Andrei, a little wide eyed at your oldest’s actions. Securing Dimitri in one arm, you wave the other at the door, “go, please! Before she gets kidnapped!”

“Right, yeah,” Andrei nods and bounces the girls in his arms, “say bye to Mama. We’ll see her later, okay?”

Taking a little break from fighting, Alina and Kira wave at you over Andrei’s shoulders, blowing kisses. You wave back and then practically deflate when the door shuts behind Andrei and you’re left alone with the now opening crying Dimitri. You sigh and get him adjusted on your breast, quieting him immediately. You rub tiredly at your eyes, frustrated and exhausted. Maybe you’d underestimated the chaos four kids are going to be.

Once Dimitri is finished eating, you call for a nurse to bring him back to the nursery so you can get some much needed sleep. “I always feel bad sending them to the nursery,” you confess to the nurse, Jenna. “It makes me feel like a bad mom.”

“Sweetheart,” she laughs warmly, “I saw that husband of yours head out of here with your little girls. Sleep as much as you can before going home to that chaos.”

“They’re usually much better behaved,” you say wryly. “New sibling apparently throws off the routine.”

She tucks Dimitri into a swaddle and says, “oh, they get used to it. You two are old pros at this, so I think you know what you’re doing.”

You smile warily at her, a nervous pit in your stomach that you hadn’t felt after any of the girls’ births. You’re not sure why you feel so unsettled now, raising a boy in the early infancy stage isn’t any different than raising daughters. When Jenna takes Dimitri back to the nursery, you slide down on the bed, pulling the blankets up to your chin and getting as comfortable as possible to take a nap. A few tears leak out of the corners of your eyes, dripping down your temples and into your hair and you take a deep breath. It catches in your throat a little and you hiccup, covering your eyes with a cold, shaky palm.

Somehow, you manage to nap on and off, dozing in that weird limbo where you can hear most of what’s happening around you, but time passes faster than you think. After what feels like two minutes, but is actually closer to two hours, you give up on the nap and find your phone in the mess on the bedside table. You busy yourself with responding to texts and scrolling through social media, zoning out to a video of a woman making homemade pop tarts when Andrei appears at the door.

“Delivery,” he announces, your head shooting up at the sound of his voice. In his hand is an obscenely large paper bag with the name of your favorite sushi place stamped on the side. He catches your gaze and shakes it enticingly. “Husband of the year, yes?”

“If there’s spicy tuna in there, I’ll get the trophy engraved now,” you tease, a small, but genuine smile on your face. Andrei kisses the corner of your mouth and sets the bag on the rolling table.

“Two spicy tuna and plenty of miso soup,” he promises, sitting down on the mattress and helping you unpack the plastic containers.

You rub your chopsticks together and ask, “how are the girls? Everything okay at home?”

Andrei’s in different clothes than when he left and he smells like soap and cologne, so you know he at least showered when he got home.

“They’re good, don’t worry about them,” he reassures you, passing over a container of seaweed salad. “Kir was down for a nap when I left and our moms were playing Barbies with the older two.”

You nod, poking at the seaweed with a lazy motion. Andrei’s gaze is steady on your bent head, you can feel his eyes studying you and so you eat a mouthful of the seaweed, chewing slowly. As hungry as you had been earlier, it’s hard to swallow now. Andrei’s knee bumps yours and you look up at him, worried brown eyes on yours.

“What’s going on, solnyshka? Are you okay?” He ducks his head so he can maintain eye contact. One of his hands comes up and cups your cheek. You lean into his touch and shrug.

“I’m okay,” you sigh. “Just…”

Andrei’s quiet while you try and find the words. You’re not even sure what you’re feeling, why you’re so overly emotional.

“I missed the girls,” you say quietly. “But, four kids? It just…this isn’t going to be easy at all, Drei. They all started chattering and Dimitri was crying and I just wanted to cry too.”

“He’s not even a day old,” Andrei says gently. “It’s okay you’re emotional. I’ll tell you a secret,” he laughs under his breath, “I cried in the car when I went to get the girls.”

“Yeah?” You raise an eyebrow, setting your chopsticks down. Andrei’s not usually one to admit to crying.

“Yeah,” he nods. “Probably more because we have a son, but still. I cried.” Andrei winks at you, smiling warmly.

A little laugh slips past your lips and you tug at the end of your braid. “I think I’ll be okay once I get into a routine. But I’m glad the moms are staying until the season starts, we’re going to need all the help we can get.”

Andrei scoffs and moves to sit next to you and wrap his arm around your shoulders so you can burrow against his side. “You’re the rock, koroleva. If anyone can handle me, four kids, and the hockey season, it’s you,” he praises you, mouth pressed against your temple. “Just tell me if you’re overwhelmed, okay? We figure it out as a team.”

You nod against his side, the knot in your chest loosening a bit. Your arm rests on his stomach and Andrei keeps you as close as possible, knowing you need the physical comfort right now. “We’re so done having kids, by the way,” you mutter into his shirt.

Andrei laughs and your whole body vibrates with the sound. He rubs his hand up and down your arm, teasing, “Dimka and I are still outnumbered.”

“Oh, that is not something I care about,” you laugh in response, snaking your hand out to pluck a piece of sushi out of its container. “We’re closed for business down there.” You pause and then continue, knowing Andrei will have a retort. “For baby making business. Other fun activities will be reevaluated at six weeks.”

Your husband gives you a mock little salute, amusement written plainly on his face. He picks up his own piece of sushi with his free hand, popping the piece in his mouth and chewing before he says, quietly and totally sincerely, “you’re the best mom the kids could’ve asked for, you know that, right?”

“You’re going to make me cry again, you big jerk,” you sniffle, pressing a hand to your mouth. “I just finished crying!”

“I’m sorry,” Andrei cuddles you closer. “Eat and rest, because the moms are not going to want to wait too much long to meet the little guy.”

You pull back a little so look up at Andrei’s face and he has a slightly dopey look in his eyes, a little upturn to his lips like he’s trying to fight off a smile. “You want to go get him, don’t you?” You ask, exhaling a little laugh through your nose.

Andrei nods eagerly, unable to hide his excitement. “Yeah,” he admits, “I know we should rest, but I really want to keep holding him.”

“Go get him,” you say, “I kind of want to get a hit of that newborn smell.”

“Weirdo,” Andrei captures your chin in his fingers and tilts your head up to kiss you sweetly.

You grin against his mouth, “your weirdo and mother to your weird children too.”

Andrei’s laugh follows him all the way out the door.

#andrei svechnikov #andrei svechnikov x reader #andrei svechnikov x you #andrei svechnikov fic #nhl fic

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misscammiedawn · 2 days

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Sometimes I get lazy and just rely on triggers and tricks to hypnotize a partner.

Oh... I know... sometimes it can feel so good to have a slow and intentional induction where I gently guide you down and let you just surrender to a blissful state of calm and comfortable reverie. I do so enjoy watching the way a wonderful trance partner's expression slowly dips and their muscles go slack and they just let gravity take over... the way that every single word impacts them more and more and they let go and become open and empty and blank for me.

Yes, the slow and gradual descent into trance is actually quite lovely. Why would I deprive myself of such a treat just because I don't wish to put in any effort?

...hmm...

Hypnotize yourself for me.

Oh I am deadly serious. Speak the words, watch my eyes, take yourself into a gradual state of trance. Don't rush it. Savor every moment of serene submission. Maybe I'll even be nice enough to add a few words of encouragement in there. "That's right", "You're doing so well", "Going so deep aren't you?"

Go ahead. I'll just sit back and watch as you start to slip and stumble through your words. As you start to sag and slur. As your words start to become gentle and docile and tame.

I'll be watching closely. So make it entertaining for me, my dear.

#dawn posting #hypnosis #hypnokink #hypnokink oc #this is *mostly* a shitpost #***MOSTLY***#hypno shitpost

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minichrismd · 2 months

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Scared of The Past (Running From the Future) - Theo Nott (1/?)

The black lake was eerily peaceful at night, the occasional slosh of water breaking on the edge and birds chirping as they flew was the only thing breaking the silence.

You sat staring out at the edge, internally debating your next steps in the mess you currently found yourself in. With the wizarding war looming on the horizon, you knew you had two choices. Stay and fight or run.

You sighed as you thought through your options. Staying to fight alongside your brother and friends seemed like the right choice, but a feeling settled in your stomach every time you thought about it. The possibility of ending up like your parents, tortured to the point of insanity and spending the rest of your life institutionalised was wildly unappealing, to the point that death would have been a better fate.

The thought of running and being freed from your wizarding life held some appeal, but it would mean leaving behind everything and everyone you’d ever know. There would no longer be a place for you in the wizarding world, essentially sentencing yourself to exile for the rest of your life. Was that a fate better than probable death?

Your mind spun these thoughts around until you felt a hand on your shoulder, jolting you to attention.

“Amore mio, it’s me.” You heard a familiar voice whisper. You relaxed almost immediately at the sound.

“Theo, you scared me.” You whispered, turning your head to look up at him, barely able to make out his face in the darkness. He gave your shoulder a squeeze as he moved to sit next to you, his hand making its way from your shoulder, down your arm to grasp at your hand.

You sat in a comfortable silence, taking the time to run your thumb over his knuckles.

“Are you still thinking about your choices?” He mumbled after a while, causing you to let out another sigh. You nodded, shuffling slightly closer to him and resting your head on his shoulder. He released his grip on your hand and wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side.

Very few people saw this side to Theo. To most, he was closed off and tight lipped, scowling and fighting were what he was known for. But to you, he was kind and open, a true gentleman.

“I don’t know what to do.” You mumbled, forcing down the lump in your throat. Theo heard the strain in your voice, quickly pulling you into a hug and placing a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“Whatever you choose, I’ll stand by you.”

“But it’s not that easy!” You spoke exasperated. “We’re on different sides of this war.”

“Not by choice.”

“I know that!”

You sighed again, pressing your palms into your eyes and rubbing them, trying to stave off the tears that you’d been holding in for days after the last order meeting you’d attended.

“I’m sorry.” You mumbled. “I shouldn’t blame you for a choice you didn’t make.”

Theo sighed and held you tighter, the light of the moon grazing on his dark mark that was peeking out from under his uniform. His induction into the Dark Lord’s army of Death Eaters had been a sore subject for weeks.

In his embrace, your tears began to fall, like a dam had broken and your emotions were flowing out freely. Your body wracked with sobs in his arms.

“It will be ok.”

“But what if it isn’t? What if one of us dies Theo?”

Theo didn’t respond but clutched you tighter to him, unwilling to let you go. At seventeen you were both too young for this, completely unprepared for what this war had caused. Lines were drawn, divides were reincarnated tenfold, war was unkind to all involved.

“What if I ran with you?” Theo mumbled, his face buried in your shoulder, his words so quiet that you barely caught them.

Your head rose from his shoulder.

“What?”

“I said, what if I ran with you?”

“You would?”

He nodded softly, lifting a hand to your cheek and brushing your tears away.

“I can’t lose you amore mio.”

#theo nott x you #theo nott one shot #theo nott x reader #theodore nott x reader #theodore nott oneshot #writing #hp fanfic #harry potter fanfiction #slytherin boys #slytherin boys x reader #slytherin boys x you #fanfic #fanfiction #harry potter #reader insert #fem reader

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bas-writes · 1 month

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nonsexual acts of intimacy ↬ sharing a dessert

❧ okkotsu yuta x gn!reader | cw: aged up character, food ❧

"Hey, you promised you won't take a peek before I call you."

You have been doing your best to not be spotted but Yuta has still somehow sensed your presence despite not even looking over his shoulder. With an apron neatly tied behind his back and hair pulled back by a hairband he's standing by the induction stove and gently—but steadily—stirring something in a saucepan. At first glance, he seems to be so absorbed by his task that nothing in this world, but his cooking existed for him, and so you assumed when you got tempted into breaking the promise. But he's sharp as ever, as if the kitchen in your shared apartment called for the same amount of focus as a fierce battlefield.

"I'm hungry," you pout and lean against the doorway, frozen in your place as if his territory was guarded by a barrier. Yuta isn't a person who's irritated by other's presence when he's cooking, but you did give a word and then broke it and let yourself be caught sneaking a peek. Anyone would feel stupid in your place.

He doesn't answer at first, focused on the steady, circular move and the size of flame under the saucepan—but finally takes a little turn and smiles at you in that characteristic, almost apologizing way, as if he was trying to scold a child in the gentlest way possible.

"I need a little more of your patience, Y/N." His gaze flicks back to the stove and he decreases the size of the flame. "I'm almost finished."

At this point standing on the threshold feels more awkward than crashing into the kitchen so you take a careful step—and upon not being scolded, you advance further until you're taking a look over his shoulder, "And what exactly is that?"

The saucepan is full of melted chocolate (and as much you could tell from distance by the smell alone)—but thicker and smoother than what you expected to find. Yuta keeps it away from boiling and his steady moves help the desired consistency remain as he's thinning it with cream and mixing in some spices, "A base for chocolate fondue."

"Didn't know they teach how to make such fancy desserts in a jujutsu establishment."

"They do, if you're in Marseilles."

"Marseilles?" You cock an eyebrow. "And when did you get to France, exactly? I thought you stayed in Kenya when you were abroad."

"That—" Yuta gives the liquid chocolate one last gentle stir before he turns and steals a quick peck from your lips. "—is my sweet little secret."

He turns the stove off, then carefully pours the chocolate into a bowl with tealights underneath. He lights them, then stirs the fondue until he's sure the texture has remained unchanged.

"Is it sweet enough?" He reaches towards the prepared prior pile of treats—cut fruit, marshmallows and crackers—and chooses a hearty piece of strawberry. It's dipped into the chocolate, then offered to your lips, all with a beaming smile on your partner's face.

Yuta is the sweetest boyfriend you've ever seen but you know him enough to learn all his tricks and mischiefs by heart. Something about his expression and pose tells you there might be a trap behind all of this—but the juicy strawberry covered in velvety chocolate is too much of a temptation.

You open your mouth and almost purr in pleasure when he puts the treat on your tongue and the flavors hit your tastebuds. It's intense but not overwhelming, and the acidity of the fruit perfectly balances the sweetness of the fondue.

You savor the treat for longer than you normally would, as if you were sipping on delicious ambrosia rather than testing a dessert. You can't bring yourself to just swallow the bite, prolonging the moment until you're almost short on breath—and to your own demise as Yuta suddenly leans close and catches your lips with a kiss. Deep kiss, you soon learn, mewling softly around his tongue sliding against yours and teasing you, until you give in and abandon the heavenly pleasures for his sake. No food, no matter how delicious, can taste as good as Yuta's kisses.

But right as your eyes close in pleasure, hand slowly reaching towards the back of his head to pull him close, Yuta withdraws as fast and smooth as he leaned for it, and still has the gall to nip on your lips when you freeze, dumbfounded, and stare at him full of disappointment, with chocolate-stained saliva drooling at the corner of your mouth.

"I think it needs more vanilla." He says, after wiping it clean with a thumb, and then sucking on it as he bolts away from your hands, ready to smack any part of him you can reach.

a/n: did i remember about those drabbles & post the continuation 4 months after the last one? naaah, impossible, never happened

#okkotsu yuta x reader #okkotsu yuta x you #yuta x reader #yuta x you #yuta x y/n #okkotsu yuta x y/n #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x y/n #jjk x y/n #bas writes #jjk #okkotsu yuta #gender neutral reader

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yggdrasilhypno · 3 months

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One of my favorite all time induction methods is a pretty classic one: cocknosis. It’s simple, effective, and gives off this pure feeling of submission almost instantly. I mean, if you’re conditioned to fall head over heels into trance at only the sight of my cock, it would make it truly effortless to sink nearly completely down into nothingness. It all comes from the power and pleasure a cock can provide.

But, it’s not about the cock itself really. It’s about what it entails for you. It’s just another hypnotic object after all, swinging back and forth like a pretty pendulum, rocking you slowly into hypnotic sleep. It’s that sinking feeling, that instant submission, knowing that soon enough it’s going to be your entire world. Knees buckled, mouth salivating, completely controlled at only the sight. But that’s only the beginning.

I love to incorporate all the senses into a good trance, using everything to my advantage. Each one another stepping stone, another building block to create the best possible experience. Cocknosis uses all of these perfectly.

Let’s start with smell, my personal favorite. Imagine that perfect scent in the air, a musk unlike any other. Rich with the essence of the days of work under my belt starting to cycle through your nose. It’s almost intoxicating by itself, driving you into a primal urge and need. Losing thoughts with each breath, with each dose of my scent.

And as those thoughts pile out, you can hear your heartbeat slow down. Almost as if it’s being rewritten by the motion of my body, it slows and slows you down, each beat becoming even more important. Keeping you nice and stable in your state, hearing firsthand how my control has set in. Each beat is just another reminder of how deep you’ve gone, and how much deeper you can go.

It’s the sight of the cock that keeps you anchored, though. Watching its motion back and forth, keeping your attention as everything else becomes a blur. It’s what enraptured you at first, the sight of my cock drawing your eyes in as it took you down deep into the suggestible state you crave. The gentle ticks and tocks of my cock rocking back and forth like a clock, enveloping your mind and body into this beautiful sensation of warmth and pleasure.

But touch is even more important however. Just the smallest touch can send shockwaves of ecstasy throughout the body. Your hand becoming the vessel for your worship, your ticket to heaven. Each part of your body that touches my cock becomes corrupted, forever linked to pleasure as you crave more and more. That corruption fueling you further to touch and explore more, giving yourself up into depravity all for that rush of bliss.

Let’s not forget taste however. Just imagining the taste on your tongue, a beautiful mix of ecstasy and sweetness. Like an aphrodisiac, one taste is enough to get you hooked. Each hit of flavor keeps you coming back for more, sending you further down into complete mindless abandon. Leaving sanity at the door, the taste corrupting you further and further into nothingness until you’re on the floor, brainless and unable to process a thought without the slightest idea of my cock.

So finally, let’s combine these, shall we? The sight of my cock, swinging just for you in that hypnotic motion that you can’t help but stare and gawk at. It’s rocking you into a deep trance, and the sound of your heartbeat slowing down only encourages you further on. Getting dizzy off the scent, it seems like you can’t wait another moment before you need it. And so, your hand slowly begins to explore my cock, getting hooked on the shocking pleasure it seems to send throughout your body with only the smallest touch. More touching, more depravity as the scent begins to overwhelm you into complete insanity over my cock. Finally, you decide to take a taste, which proves to be the final nail in the coffin. The aphrodisiac like taste hits your tongue, and you’re sent into an ecstatic frenzy of excitement, nothing holding you back from complete and utter pleasure. All five senses being molded by me, used to send you into a fit of mindlessness where all you seek is bliss. This pleasure overwhelms you, and you can’t help but cum your pretty little brains out. As your body gives way to relaxation and that energy turns into a beautiful afterglow, your mind begins to cycle through once more, becoming nothing but a puppet for my entertainment~

If you’ve sunk nice and deep, feel free to ride this feeling for as long as you want. Until next time~

#hypnosis #hypnodomme #hypnok1nk #brainwashing #hypnosub #hypnotized #mind control #brainless #covert hypnosis #cocknosis

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barsformars · 7 months

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Lemonade

g - pure fluff

p - wooyoung x f! reader

w.c - 1023

t.w - none

c - you help out at wooyoung’s brother school carnival and get mistaken for his parents.

a.n - idk what inspired me to write this but i think its quite cute and i want a love like this frfr

it’s two in the afternoon on a saturday and you somehow find yourself in an indoor sports hall surrounded by parents and their elementary school children for their school induction carnival.

“so why am i here again?” you leaned back to whisper into wooyoung’s ears, smiling at the group of young teachers walking past your lemonade stand as they gushed about how they weren’t aware kyungmin parents were this young and beautiful.

“please give lots of love to kyungmin!” wooyoung waved at them with a bright smile which was reciprocated with even bigger smiles and head nods. “seems like kyungmin’s going to be popular,” wooyoung commented. the teachers weren’t the only ones, other parents seemed to share the same sentiment.

you pushed wooyoung’s fringe to the side, clearing his view as he sliced up more lemons. he surely is very handsome, and so you said, “i think you’re the one they care about.”

he laughed under his breath, creasing the corners of his eyes and revealing his dimples clearer than ever. “well, kyungmin is lucky to have such a good looking brother,” wooyoung added on.

you pouted upon hearing that as you pointed at the badge you had pinned on your shirt — ‘kyungmin’s mom’. wooyoung reasoned that they didn’t have time to get it reprinted since his parents had urgent matters to attend to. they felt bad pulling out last minute since it was also on volunteer basis and the school needed as much support as they could get. you had suggested writing over it but he whined that it would be ugly, and also harmless even if they mistook the both of you for his parents.

“i feel like i’m committing fraud,”you confessed softly, “this is the first time the parents are meeting each other, and we aren’t even actually them.”

wooyoung was about to lean in for a peck when a customer arrived at the stall with her daughter, ordering two cups of iced lemonade. he quickly puts on his million-dollar smile, his voice laced with honey as he sweetly makes small talk. “what class is our pretty jihyun in?” he asked, his gentle eyes shifting from her name tag to her little face.

you did your part by pouring the drinks and covering the lids before passing them to wooyoung, who very swiftly wrote a cute note on the cups while still holding the conversation.

“kyungmin eomma, your husband is so sweet, you’re so lucky!” the lady called out to you. you awkwardly thanked her and you can already see the weird faces wooyoung was making at you from the corner of your eyes.

once the lady and her daughter had walked away, you pushed his cheek towards the other side. you didn’t want him to notice how your own were starting to flush. you didn’t want to admit that you enjoyed having wooyoung being referred to as your husband, especially not when neither of you have ever brought up tying the knot yet.

“so i was going to say that you’re basically kyungmin’s honorary mother at this point,” wooyoung said softly from behind you, his hands resting on the side of your hips. he attempted to peek at your face but you shunned, flustered. you still turned to face him, reminded by the fact that this was not the best place for public displays of affection.

“why are you blushing so hard?” wooyoung questioned, genuinely surprised. he had started to think you were getting immune to his ways of affection.

you cupped your face with your hands, wanting to gauge just how red you were — you were burning hot. it did not help that wooyoung was guessing what exactly got you feeling this way, and getting it on the second try.

“you like it when people call me your husband?” he teased. wooyoung knew you long enough to tell that you meant a ‘yes’ despite you pushing him away again. “do you want to be referred to as my wife?”

you shot him a look. it doesn’t hit the same.

“alright, i’ll settle with a one-sided marriage then,” wooyoung joked. “you have yet to proposed though, by the way.”

“would you want to marry me?” your gaze locked with his. if he was serious about it, you would be down for it too.

“of course,” wooyoung replied without hesitation, reaching out to take your hands in his. “i was just kidding earlier on though, i want to be the one proposing,” he clarified.

he had been thinking about bringing this topic up for quite some time but the two of you have been too busy pursuing your own careers. but wooyoung realised that if he kept letting that excuse stop him, it would never happen till he retires. he’s not going to make you wait that long, even if you were willing.

you swiftly checked your surroundings before sneaking a peck on his lips, “thank you for always wanting me in your life, i feel very loved.” you may have refused his initial invitation to help out at the carnival with him but it didn’t mean that you didn’t appreciate it. you were always the first person on his mind, and always the person he chooses to go to regardless of the matter.

“and thank you for wanting to be with me, i love you, lots,” wooyoung replied before engulfing you in his arms. he couldn’t wait to live out the rest of his life with you, going on exciting adventures or staying at home accompanying each other in silence or doing simple things like slicing up and juicing lemons in an elementary school’s indoor sports hall.

“you know what they say about making lemonade when life throws you lemons,” wooyoung said as he suppressed a smirk.

“uhuh…”

“what do you do then when life gives you love?”

you slapped him on the shoulder and lightly shoved him to the side. “this is not the best place for that kind of jokes, woo!”

#ateez fluff #ateez fanfic #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #ateez oneshots #ateez drabbles #ateez writings #ateez reactions #ateez #wooyoung fluff #ateez wooyoung

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w1ldthoughts · 9 months

Note

Can you do a second part of killer cravings, where the readers water breaks, goes into labor and goes through birth that would be great please and thanks. :) (:

A/n: Buckle up this is a lengthy one…but probably the cutest thing I’ve ever written. Glad you enjoyed the previous one-shot! Thank you for requesting this anon I thoroughly enjoyed writing it :)

Here is my Masterlist with my other work and requests/asks are always welcome!

Warning: pregnancy and childbirth, nausea, mention of getting sick, a LOT of fluff

Little Duckling

Saturday 10pm

Justin had been asleep for almost two hours as you folded laundry and put it away in the nursery. Your induction was scheduled for Monday morning promptly at 8am and everyone within the Chargers organization knew that this was happening because your husband absolutely hated taking the day off. But this was understandably a special exception to the rule. You’d spent the last 9 months mentally and physically preparing yourself for this moment but the idea of having a human being relying on you for everything was still such a daunting task that you almost wished the day wouldn’t come.

And then the ache in your back and hips reminded you that your baby girl was quickly running out of room and would be making her entrance soon, whether you and your husband were ready or not. On the bright side, your stomach had dropped significantly in the last few days, allowing you to breathe easier and for Justin to poke fun at your pronounced waddle. He affectionately started calling you Mumble last week, from Happy Feet. The dad jokes were coming in strong.

You heaved yourself out of the chair you were parked in and were headed off to bed before a slight pain wrapped itself around the base of your stomach. The pressure moved from your back and hips, traveling to the area just underneath your belly button. You stopped walking and used the wall to support yourself, rubbing small circles around the area until it passed. As a Braxton-Hicks veteran, you continued your trek to the bedroom, completed your nighttime routine and headed off to bed.

Sunday 2am

It happened again, this twinge of discomfort that had you holding your breath for about 15 seconds before it released you and you had to take several deep breaths to recover. After a few minutes everything was normal again and you had to turn behind you to make sure that Justin was still asleep. Throughout your pregnancy he’d become a much lighter sleeper, often waking up at ungodly hours to get you snacks or a few nights when you caught him talking to your belly, whether it was talking about the playbook or just telling her he couldn’t wait to meet her, it warmed your heart just the same. But you were thankful for now that he just missed that entire exchange because you were definitely not in labor…right?

Sunday 7am

You were definitely in labor. On a Sunday, when the Chargers were playing the Chiefs at home. Of course. You’d experienced three contractions so far, four hours apart so you had plenty of time. There was no way in hell you were telling Justin. As soon as it was appropriate, you scooted yourself out of bed and went down to the home gym for some prenatal yoga for a good stretch and hopefully a boost of positive energy. Then you hopped in the shower, hoping the warm water would relax your tense muscles and maybe help you delay the inevitable.

By 8:30 Justin was awake and making breakfast for the two of you while you sat on the couch watching New Girl. He brought your plate and a cup of orange juice to you which you were grateful for, but the thought of putting anything but the juice in your body made your stomach turn.

“Are you alright? You’ve barely touched your avocado toast and you’ve been devouring it the last few days.” He ran a gentle hand on your forehead to check your temperature and tucked some hair behind your ear. “I can make you something else before I leave if you want?”

“No, I’m fine! Just not hungry yet, I’ll probably eat later.” You lied through your teeth, desperately hoping that he would let it go. The excuse seemed to satisfy him enough for him to head back upstairs to watch some film and get ready. An hour and a half later, he headed downstairs just in time to find you stretching out your back, a cramp beginning to wash over you.

He replaced your hands with his own, slightly lifting your stomach to take the weight off for a bit. “Your stomach is hard as a rock,” he observed furrowing his brows and starting to piece things together.

“Yeah I’m having a fake contraction, you know they’re so common these days.” You rushed out, attempting to use his extensive research against him.

Although he nods his head in understanding, his face is full of distress. “I know, I just hate the thought of you being in pain and there’s nothing I can do about it.”

You tap his wrist so he can slowly drop your belly and you turn around in his arms. “You’re so cute, but it really isn’t that bad. A lot less painful than playing with fractured rib cartilage for two months I can tell you that.” You chuckle at his struggle a few years ago, his hands rubbing soothing circles on your back. “Here’s what’s gonna happen today though. You are going to go and kick the Chiefs’ ass then you’re going to come home, we’ll celebrate and then tomorrow you’ll be on your way to being the greatest dad to ever live. How does that sound?”

Justin chuckles, giving you a peck on the lips, nose and forehead. “If I’m half as good a parent as I know you’ll be, then I know I’ll be golden.”

“Stop it before I start crying, you know I’m super hormonal right now this isn’t fair.” You mumble, tears brimming your eyes. He gives you one last kiss before reminding you to call your friend Dani to stay with you, even though your moms were on their way to your home.

Once he pulled out of the driveway you could relax, letting out a deep sigh and patting your swollen middle. Crisis averted.

Sunday 12pm

Contractions were officially every hour and Dani was trying her best not to freak out in order not to freak you out. But she was definitely freaking out. What started out as more intense period cramps were becoming a lot sharper, so much so that you couldn’t even enjoy Encanto, which made you sad. You did manage to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and take a nap while she was with you, fluffing your pillows and telling you that you were doing amazing. Three hours later, there was a knock at the door and Dani went to open it for Holly and your mom. The two becoming best friends was probably the cutest thing in the world and your mom had even flown to Oregon three days before just to spend time with Holly and drive to California with her. They were the sweetest. And of course they brought snacks. There were lactation cookies for you in the freezer already but they brought more and they brought an abundance of food to eat during the game, which usually would have you celebrating but today made you want to stick your face in the toilet.

You greeted the two women with hugs as Dani helped set up their spread and they immediately asked how you were feeling.

“I just woke up not too long ago so I’m feeling great now, ready to not be pregnant anymore so I can see my f—ohhh wow. Ow.” You groaned, one hand on your contracting belly and the other gripping the counter for dear life.

Dani’s eyes bug out of her head as she moves to rub your back. “That was the roughest one yet.” She was right, this one left your whole body sore and let you know that things were definitely moving along.

“That one?” Your mom questions, looking between you and Dani. Then, she and Holly exchange a look.

“Oh my gosh sweetie, you’re in labor!” Holly exclaims, “we need to get a hold of Justin immediately, I’ll call Mark I’m sure he’s already at the stadium.”

You cannot shake your head fast enough, “we don’t need to call him yet, that was the first bad one. And this game is important.”

“It’s Justin hun, every game is important,” Holly laughs, giving your shoulder a loving squeeze. “But you know what’s even more important to him? You and that baby girl that’s getting ready to see us soon, are you sure you don’t want to tell him now?”

“I’m sure,” you sigh, allowing your mom to guide you back to the couch, settling down with a groan. “Once the game is over he’ll be here and we’ll go have a baby. But not a moment before.”

Admittedly, it was getting harder to focus. Justin was playing great, but of course so was Patrick Mahomes. The Chargers would score and the Chiefs would answer. The Chiefs would get a stop and the Chargers would force a punt. But the battle within you was the most interesting one to the people in your house.

Your mom had gone down to find your birthing ball, which helped for about half a quarter, just in time for a Quentin Johnston touchdown to put the Chargers up by 10. By the end of the third you were forced into a squat behind one of the couches, spreading your legs to hopefully ease the increasing pressure on your hips. Holly made sure you stayed hydrated, having secretly texted her husband halfway through the fourth quarter when the game was firmly in hand to have their son home as soon as humanly possible. Contractions creeped on 30 minutes apart, leaving you panting and groaning in discomfort until your muscles relaxed.

Fifteen minutes later, you were pacing around the living room and you had to stop to hold onto the couch again, your mom helping you roll your hips as you felt thin beads of sweat building around your hairline. Things were getting real and scary and you needed Justin.

“What time is it?” You murmured, cupping your stomach with a hiss as the baby moved.

“It’s 7:15 and he’s on his way home, baby.” Your mom whispers, sensing your increasing distress, “he’ll be here soon.”

Time was not a construct you were familiar with anymore, Dani was in charge of timing contractions and all you knew was the moment in between them where you could actually speak. You headed upstairs for some time to yourself and a wave of nausea hit you and you emptied probably everything you’d eaten the entire day, which in hindsight probably wasn’t much. But you weren’t in the headspace to think clearly right now. You walked back to the bedroom and clutched the doorway, visibly feeling the heaviness of the baby moving down, almost sending you to your knees if it weren’t for the solid, calming presence that was suddenly in front of you.

“Hey babe.” You breathe out, your legs still feeling shaky.

He pulled you into his arms as close as your belly would allow and kissed your forehead. “Hi. Glad I could make it back in time, I knew something was off with you this morning,” he narrowed his eyebrows at you when he pulled away, walking you slowly back into the room. “How long have you been in labor? We can be honest now.”

You let out a dry laugh, “since 10 last night I think? But let’s focus on the important things, you played great and you won but Jesus you guys really took a minute to shut the door on ‘em.”

“Right, the important things. I know you love football as much as I do now, but you know if you told me earlier I would’ve been at your side in a heartbeat. You know that, right?”

God, you hoped your baby had his caring heart. “I do know. But I also knew that you’d be able to do both. The Chargers are your family too and—”

A contraction creeped up on you, leaving you to hold onto your husband’s forearms with a sharp sound of pain, the pressure reaching an overwhelming peak that you hadn’t experienced before.

“Squeeze as much as you want, it’s okay.” His voice attempts to soothe you but you couldn’t hear him over the animalistic grunt that escaped you. Your body tensed involuntarily and he could see your stomach hardening as the tension continued to build. There was nothing more he could do than hold you through it, until something gave way and the floodgates opened…literally.

“Your water just broke.” He said with a smile.

Sunday 10pm

Contractions in the house were terrible. But contractions in the car, with no cushion from the water bag made it feel like she was right between your legs.

“Justin, you have to go faster. Please.” You panted out, desperately clutching the grab handle and leaning your head back with a loud moan. “Can you turn on the air, I’m fucking dying in here. And I need to put the seat back, my back is killing me.” You felt guilty for whining but you also like a turtle stuck on its back, waiting for someone to turn it over and set it free. You were basically at his mercy right now and the look on his face explained the situation perfectly.

“Yeah, yeah do whatever you need. Whatever makes you comfortable, we’ll be there soon.” He patted your leg lovingly, constantly looking between you and the road, slightly worried that he’d have to deliver the baby in the car. When you let out another groan of pain, his grip on the steering wheel tightened and remained that way until the birthing center came into view. Your parents had called ahead and would meet you there when given the word, so all you had to do was check in and you were brought to your private suite.

Seven centimeters dilated and without painkillers made your husband question any football toughness he thought he had. You were so close to meeting your baby and he was a mix of anxiousness, nerves and excitement. But most of all he felt so much love and admiration for your determination and strength. Holding off on telling him you were in labor so he could be there to get the job done with his teammates was one thing but it was a complete whirlwind to be there with you while you worked your ass off to bring your baby into the world.

The two of you decided to use gravity to your advantage and walk around the building since the entire floor was closed off at your husband’s request. You needed the privacy. He couldn’t risk anyone leaking the most cherished moment of his life.

“I can’t believe this is our last night as a duo.” Justin whispers, walking at a snail’s pace while you waddled alongside him. “It’s been a great ride, pal.”

“Wouldn’t want to do it with anyone else. And I have a feeling this ride is going to get a lot more interesting from here on out.” You gave your belly a soothing pat.

He strokes your back as you sway your hips again, “thank you for choosing me to be the one that gets to do this with you. I love you so much.”

“I love you too, more than anything in the world.” You grin, pulling him in for a soft kiss. His hand cups your face as he pulls you in even closer. The kiss oozed joy and gratitude. Your husband wasn’t a man of many words, but his actions spoke volumes.

You squeeze his arm again suddenly as pain bubbles deep in your core and you rip yourself away from him to press your lips together to stifle a yell. “We need to get back to the room. Now.”

The noises leaving your body would have horrified you if you weren’t already sitting backwards on the toilet wearing only an oversized t-shirt, with your legs spread and the man of your dreams digging his thumbs into your back. “Harder please,” you groan, feeling like your tailbone is seconds away from shattering.

“I’m not getting a break,” you cry, leaning back and asking him to help you up. He hooks his hands under your arms and basically lifts you to your feet. “It’s not stopping, I can’t—oh fuck.” You were either about to have the biggest bowel movement of your life or…

“She’s coming—she’s coming right now Justin I have to push.” That was all you could manage before the urge took over and your body wasn’t your own. You held onto one of his hands and moved into a squat as he pressed the red button on the side of the bathroom door, allowing your midwife to come in.

Pushing felt good, even though it left you shaking like a leaf in a cold and sweaty frenzy. It was the most intense experience of your life but you took one look at those grey-green eyes. The owner of them kissed your hand and reminded you that he was with you the entire time and you knew you could do anything with him by your side.

Remington Grace Herbert was born Monday morning at 1:42am with those exact same eyes that you fell in love with.

“Hi Remi,” Justin sobs, kissing her cheek. “We’ve been waiting a long time for you, baby girl.”

“She sure knows how to make an entrance.”

You hand her off to her dad after scooting over to give him more room on the bed. He wraps a free arm around you, securely holding her in his other one, totally in awe. “She’s so perfect, you’re perfect. You did so amazing, I’m so freaking proud of you.” He kisses the side of your head.

You cuddle into him with a content sigh, “Our perfect little duckling is finally here.”

#justin herbert #justin herbert x reader #justin herbert imagine #nfl imagine

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hyptrance1 · 5 months

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Hypnosis Challenge 4 : Hypnosis Boogaloo

Hi guys, this is my fourth hypnosis challenge, and the first one I have written since probably 2019. I have had a lot of people asking for a new one so here it is. The goal is simple: try not to get hypnotized while reading this. If you don’t congratulations, you won! I’m super happy for you. If you do lose the challenge and go under, you’ll be given a post hypnotic suggestion to dm me your first name, age, and a phrase. If you dont want to do that, then my best advice is to not do this and leave now 😅. Simple as that. If you do decide to do this, just know that this is 18+ so don’t continue if you’re not of age. I mean it. Alright, that seems to be enough forewarning, so without further ado, let the challenge begin and good luck!

I’ve done a lot of these text inductions before and from one sub that has gone under to them a lot, he says that this is how he usually finds himself when he starts reading one of these inductions. He says that he tries to not get too comfortable, because getting too comfortable especially when reading makes it that much easier to focus on my words in front of him. Mind you, he also says that reading those first few sentences, just like diving into a book that you really want to read or a movie that you really want to see, sucks your attention is so that without even realizing it he’s shifting in his seat or in bed, getting into a more comfortable position while reading my words. It’s almost like a subconscious reaction, just settling in to focus on something. It makes sense, we are programmed to try and get comfortable when focusing on something, makes it easier to read and focus. Our bodies just want to get comfortable anyways, so completely makes sense to me.

He then says that the wording I use for the induction is pretty nice. It’s like he’s reading his own thoughts sometimes. Usually he says he hears it in his own voice, like an inner monologue, slow and rhythmic. I don’t intentionally do this mind you, it’s just the way that I write tends to be easy enough to read, at a good pace, and sounds just like someone talking to you. He said that I also use words meant to make the reader focus more, like follow, focus, simple, easy. I don’t really understand what he means by this, but I get the gist that the words I use make it easy for people to focus and pay attention to. It’s not too hard to understand. I don’t use big, difficult words. It’s all just pretty simple.

He then says that I do a good job at describing how he feels when he is reading my words, what his body feels. His breathing slows down and then his body just seems to relax with him. That was an easy one to explain to him. How our bodies start to naturally just relax when we slowly begin to inhale fully and gently exhale completely. It allows for more air to get into our bodies, which allows for our muscles to begin the process of relaxing. He called it melting into his seat, which is cute, but relaxing is the better way to describe it. Usually I remind people that each slow inhale and gentle exhale is also doing something for them as well. Each slow inhale allowing for more positive emotions to begin filling the body: happiness, calm, relaxation. Every gentle exhale though does the opposite, it allows for all the negatives to leave the person and allow for them to relax further. Less worries, cares, stress. It can just be breathed out while you allow your body to relax and focus on the positive feelings coming in with every slow inhale.

Usually I focus on the lowest part of the body and work my way up, but its also nice sometimes to just have the person picture where they hold in the most stress in their bodies and let the tension their go first. For me it’s the shoulders. I always seem to have a lot of tension there, so I would imagine as I am slowly inhaling all this relaxation flowing into my shoulders, pushing out any stress, tension, or tightness for me to gently exhale. I can feel my shoulders get heavier then, sink lower down my sides. Then, when I feel I have gotten rid of all the negative in that part of my body, I would move onto the next part, and then the next. Allowing the slow inhale to unstick the negative things from their place and the gentle exhale to breathe them out.

But I forgot why we’re here, to focus on an induction. My sub says that the next thing I do is tease him a little bit, say that he is having trouble looking away from my words even though the goal of the induction is to try and not go under. I would say something like, “you can look away all you want, but you notice that your eyes slowly continue to return to their spot on the page, and you find that you continue reading at a slow and easy pace”. He says that anytime he reads that he remembers he’s supposed to try and resist, and tries to look away, but his eyes always return back to the same part of the reading. Again and again, trying to look away all the while his eyes just return to the thing they know he wants to continue reading. It’s cute how he says it can be frustrating resisting when my words make it so easy to relax and focus on.

He lastly said that I just seem to relate to the guys that read my words. I understand that it’s not always my relaxing words or easy phrases that make a guy finally sink completely to my words. We are all normal people, some of us are stressed, some of us have had a long day, some of us have just come back from work or the gym, and some of us and just wanting to goo deeper into that mindless, empty, peaceful feeling. Whatever the case, that also contributes to guys going under to my words as well.

It is usually at this point in the induction that I find a guy is probably relaxed enough, calm enough, and focused enough to try and take under completely. By this time their slow inhaling and gentle exhaling has caused most of the negativity in their body to be filled with positive, comfortable feelings, and their bodies are usually relaxed by this point. Their minds focused on my words, there’s really nothing else left to do besides count down from ten, letting them know that their minds will sink deeper and deeper with each number until, when I reach 0, they will be completely hypnotized. I usually ask if they understand that, especially since if they are so relaxed, reading further will take them under and they will lose the challenge, but the challenge usually doesn’t seem important to them now that they’re so content reading my words, listening to them floating in their heads, and wanting to go completely hypnotized. So I begin.

The countdown is slow, with spaces in between to remind guys how they’re feeling.

Still slowly inhaling and gently exhaling. Allowing for the rest of their worries and stress to disappear from their bodies.

No need to worry about thinking or thoughts when you’re so focused on my words.

Completely relaxing your muscles.

Gently exhaling your thoughts.

My words filling your mind.

Simple. Easy. Relaxing.

As you allow yourself.

To sink.

Completely Hypnotized.

Empty.

Now at this moment you just wanted to continue to read. Continue to follow the words in front of you. At this point you feel yourself hypnotized and entranced by my words. This lovely feeling is enveloping you like a comfy blanket.

You should also know, if you are feeling so good and relaxed, that you are under hypnosis. As a reminder, this meant that you lost the challenge and had to complete a task for me. The task is simple. When you wake up from this trance you can dm me your first name, age, and that you lost the challenge and were hypnotized by my words. If you do not wish to complete this post hypnotic suggestion, please feel free not to complete it and to disregard the rest of this paragraph. For those of you that are okay with following this direction, you can feel that post hypnotic suggestion flow into your mind with the rest of my words, ready to be followed when you wake up.

Which, in another moment you will wake when I count to 3. I want you to all feel nice, relaxed, and hoary when you wake from this trance, content and feeling well rested. You will feel peaceful from your time reading these words. Now:

Thoughts returning to your mind

Becoming more alert, more awake, more conscious.

Wide awake.

Wide, wide awake.

Alright then, hopefully you enjoyed this new rendition of an old classic challenge. If you won or lost, congratulations and I hope that you enjoyed yourself somehow. If you have questions comments or concerns feel free to let me know. Other than that, until I do another one of these…if I do another one of these…maybe.

Have a good one.

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grippingbeskar · 11 months

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unearthed

chapter four - fitted

warnings— canon typical violence, swearing, a slow slow build up and it’s painful i hate it here.

a/n— thanks for all the support guys!!! i’m trying to get these up as quick as i can, because i feel like this will read better if it’s all done together but that’s okay!!! we will get there! also i didn’t realise how short this chapter was i’m sorry next one coming super fast i promise xx.

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“Can you just run me through it one more time?” You ask, eyes unsure of where to land. The man in front of you bites back a sigh, and you remind yourself to actually pay attention this time.

“All you have to do is walk up the stairs. You’ll kneel in front of the Armourer, and the King will stand at your side. She’ll say the phrases, and you repeat them.” You swallow, already having forgotten what you were supposed to say. “This is before you meet the King and say your offical vows.”

“Right. And that… that was happening in the…” He isn’t able to hold back his sigh this time, though he keeps himself in check The people here seem to respect you— or tolerate you enough that they’ve become accustomed to your presence.

“The greenhouse. It’s our most secluded area. It will be safe for him then, to reveal himself to you and intertwine the two halves of a whole that is your union.” You choke, spluttering the bottle of water you were sipping on.

“I’m— I’m sorry, what?”

“Well, you are in love. In Mandalorian custom, this is what is etched in the Old Way. You are to become part of his clan, in a more intimate way than anyone ever will.” Love. Stars fucking help you.

“And he agreed to… that?”

“It is expected.” The man finishes, and your mind freezes up like you’ve down a glass of blue milk too quick. “Are you alright, my lady?”

“Yeah! Yep. Super… that’s all— so great! Very much in love. I actually have to— go. I have to go and do something. I’ll be back—“ You were basically running now, despite the man’s protests, the door shutting behind you when you were already halfway down the hall.

It was too much.

Tomorrow, you’d be marrying him— joining a way of life you knew frighteningly little about, and now you were just supposed to… to see him? With anyone else, it would of been the first thing you’d done, but with him it feels like a way bigger deal. You know it is. You can’t help but feel like an imposter… like you’re stealing something from him he clearly does not want to give. Something that should belong to someone he truely cared about… not part of some contract.

The way he talked about it that day in the city, as brief as the conversation was, you could tell he cared. You hardly knew him, but you could read him better now. He actually wasn’t that hard to understand once you’d watched him for a little— his body language betrayed him too often. You imagined under that helmet he made all kinds of faces, unable to hide the emotion that you almost knew flashed across it.

It was hard not to think of what was under there. Often. Too often to be simple curiosity.

When you finally see the door to your room, you were about ready to pass out, but a giant shiny metal blockade slammed into you just as you rounded the corner.

“Fucking hell!” You shout, your palm flying to your now throbbing head. “I swear I’m gonna get you a bell or something. Stars.”

He laughs quickly, the sound soothing the ache in your head, but it’s gone too soon. When you come to, your eyes opening, it’s a sight for sore eyes. The gentle stream of moonlight coming from the hallway bathes the silver armour in a soft white, the beskar lined floors twinkling like stars.

“I was looking for you. You need to come with me— the Armourer wants to see you.” You try not to groan, your eyes closing again. “She needs to choose your armour. For tomorrow.”

Tomorrow. Your wedding day. And induction into the way of the Mandalorian. Of course. That.

“Right— okay, I can… let’s go. Lead the way.” You sigh, going to take a step. He surprises you when he reaches out, gentle hands wrapping around your wrists.

The gesture stops you in your tracks, breath catching in your lungs. He scans you, helmet moving slowly across your features while his hands bring your own away from your face. The exhaustion you were just feeling seems to seep out of you the longer his attention is undivided on your eyes, adrenaline rushing to your heart.

He was so overwhelming. He took up every tiny space in your vision and your mind when he was looking at you. It was impossible to think straight around him. You were too busy thinking of… of the way his hands were tight but gentle, something you could easily get out of if you wanted to. You also think about how you… don’t want to get out of his hold. Not anytime soon.

“How long has it been since you slept?” He asks, his voice as gentle as his hands holding you in place.

“Do I look that bad?” You try to joke, and his head just tilts. It’s not one of his ‘okay, you got me there’ head tilts either. No, this one is more… calculating. Systematic. Not very fun. “I don’t know— I just got up early this morning. We’re getting married tomorrow, and apparently there’s a lot more planning involved than I thought.”

“You don’t sleep well here.” He was still holding you. You flexed your fingers, knuckles brushing lightly against the cool chest plate of his hard armour. “These past few weeks, you haven’t slept.”

“I have! I just…” Your shoulders sag, but you manage to keep looking into the black lines of his helmet. It was weird to think his eyes were right under there. “I don’t sleep well anywhere. It’s not just Mandalore. Scouts Honour.”

“I don’t know what that is.” You laugh, and somehow a small conversation with him wakes you up enough to snark back.

“Yeah. Hard to imagine you as a Boy Scout.” He says nothing about how he knows you haven’t slept, but instead holds you there for just a second longer. In the silence, you try to imagine what he’s thinking.

If he wasn’t buried under a helmet, you would think this was a move. A way to pull you closer, hands at his chest, so he could easily lean down to kiss you. But him being…him, he must just really be examining you. Studying you.

Your palms were sweating a little, and he finally lets you go, air whooshing back into your body when he steps away.

“We’ll be quick.” He says simply, leading you towards the end of the hall. You shuffle behind him, your fingers wrapping around the small part of your wrist where his gloves held you. The skin tingles, and you shove your hands in your pockets after that, refusing to look at them.

Din watched you. He found himself doing that a lot these days. You stick to the edge of the room, not nervous or intimidated, but it’s like you were trying to respect the space.

The Armorer had managed to get the Forge looking in some what good condition— at the very least, she was back to what she did best. Making armour that would protect the next generation of Mandalore.

“Din Djarin. You have what I requested?” She speaks, and you watch curiously, taking a step forward as he hands over a stack of beskar ingots. The choice was clear— if you were going to stand with him, you’d be in nothing but the best of what he had to offer.

When the Armourer calls your name, you step forward, your eyes flitting between the giant metal sphere of the Forge and the stack of beskar Din just handed over.

“You are to take the helm. To join Din Djarin as a part of his clan. Do you accept the offer presented?” She asks, her voice the same monotone it always it. When he looks back to you, you weren’t focused on any of the parts of the room. No, you were staring straight at him.

“Din Djarin.” You try the words out in your tongue. He never told you his name. Something sinks in his gut at that, and the fact that you never asked. “I’ve never heard a name like that before.”

“Do you accept?” The Armorer repeats, and you finally look away. He can’t help but feel confused— the way his gut twists and his hands clench even at the memory of the way you say his name. He wants to hear you more— wants to ask you questions like you do to him so freely. Instead, he stays quiet.

“Yeah— yes. I accept.” You say the last part as a question, looking to him. When he nods, you repeat it more firm. The confidence clings to you well. It suits you.

As the Armourer works, he remembers what his people were saying about you in the city. How you were fitting to the planet so well, it’s like you were born here. You had a way to never seem out of place— not like he was when he first came. Everything that took him so long to figure out, you navigated with ease.

They were right. It did suit you— the planet, the beskar… everything.

They were right about something else, too. The part Din conveniently left out when you asked him what he’d heard through the helmets’ receiver. Those women in the city… they couldn’t stop speaking of how beautiful you were.

Din swallowed. Of course he’d… noticed. It was impossible not to. You were a princess— now a Queen, always dressed in glowing colours, your hair flowing freely, a wild look about you like you’d just as easily spend your days navigating Hoth as you did sorting paperwork.

When he’d first seen you, his mouth had gone dry. He thought it was because he knew what was to come— the inevitable marriage, the closeness that would ensue. But looking at you now, being fitting into pauldrons of armour, he realised it may not be the dresses or the winning royal decor— it might just be because those women were right. You were beautiful.

“This is the Way.” The Armourer recites, and takes back the pieces of beskar to place them in the Forge. “The suit will be ready for tomorrow.”

Din nods, his chest tight at the reality. Tomorrow, you would be his wife. He’d bring you into his clan, a part of his planet, potentially tying himself to you for the rest of his life.

He turned and left the room without another word.

You were pacing. The small balcony attached to your room didn’t allow you a lot of room to move, but you needed to get this nervous energy out.

You’d already holo’ed Kaylen, four times in the past hour, and as many times as she’d offered the best advice she could, there was only so much she could do. No matter how many well placed words she chimed down the line, you were still getting married tomorrow.

It was stupid. You’d pictured this day— all kinds of ways, really. A practical part of you had imagined something like this. Alone, a man you couldn’t put a face to, just as reluctant as you are standing at the end of the isle. You knew it was coming, but a part of you was still holding onto that stupidly fragile sliver of hope that you’d marry someone you…loved.

It wasn’t that you were upset about who you were marrying, though. Just the circumstances. In fact, the past few weeks have made you think that in another world, where you were given the time, you could even see yourself growing to like… Din.

Din. That was his name. Another part of the mystery unfurled. When the Armorer had called it out, a thrill rushed through you, and you’d felt like you’d been let in on some giant secret. You weren’t going to ask— not that you didn’t want to know, but it was more about the conversation you had with him on that first day. To give his heart was to give his trust. He was already giving up so much of himself when he clearly didn’t want to. His name was his, and it would come when he was ready. Or, apparently, when the Armourer was ready.

Just as you were going to crawl back inside and attempt to get some sleep, a familiar voice called you out. When your head shot around, you couldn’t see him straight away, and you could not believe he’d snuck up on you again. But where the hell was he—

He called your name again, and you looked up and to the right.

“What the fuck?” Your eyes widened, seeing him lean over a much larger balcony, helmet tilted to the side. “How long have you been up there?”

“I live here.” You sigh loudly.

“Right...”

“You still aren’t sleeping.” He says, something in his voice making you feel the same way as when he was holding your wrists in the corridor.

That’s how he knew.

“You’ve been watching me?”

“I could hear you pacing.” The helmet tilts to the other side, every one of his movements slow and calm.

“Sorry.” You look outwards, the dark midnight of the planet obscuring the entire city. It was almost impossible to see any of the swirling stars and expanding buildings from here. The only person you could see was Din.

“Don't apologise. I was already awake.” You laugh tiredly at that, looking back up to him. “Are you still…okay, going through with this?”

“Scared I’m going to leave you at the altar?” The quiet response you don’t receive makes you feel a little guilty. “Don’t worry. I’ll be there.”

He shifts on his feet. Even this far away you can read his body language. How his hands clench at his sides, his legs stand straight and boots turned inwards, like he's preparing for a hit that won't come. It nearly makes you smile. Another little bit of mystery unfolded for your eyes only.

“I was meaning to tell you. I heard back from my friend in the Outer Rim. She may be able to tell you about some of the serial codes if you can identify the droids. We would have go to her, though. She doesn’t travel much. And she's paranoid about working with me over comms.” You squeeze your eyes shut for a second, and you feel entirely selfish.

Of course. Your parents. The droids that your father was interested in. You’d been swept up in it— in him. He was taking every slice of your attention, occupying every inch of your mind, there’d been moments where you’d forgotten your purpose here.

“Of course! When can we go?!” You are suddenly wide awake, leaning over the railing and stretching to look up at him.

“We could tomorrow, after the… ceremony. We have time before things are settled. We could see if there’s a lead. When you return to your home, you follow it and report back. Once we have numbers, I’ll talk to Bo-Katan.” Stars— real hope was building in your chest, and it was all thanks to him.

“Thankyou, Din. You don’t… you don’t know how much that means to me.” You’d been searching what felt like your entire short reign for something… anything that could lead you to your parents murderers. The New Republic scrapped anything related to the Empire, and anyone that knew anything was definitely not going to speak to a new ruler of a powerful planet. “I don’t know how to thank you.”

“If you do what you said you would— help my people recover what we have lost, there’s no debt.” With the short words, he turns around, and you lose sight of the face of the helmet you’d started to actually like. “Try to sleep.”

“Yeah…” You fade off as he disappears, something in your heart telling you to call after him.

You don’t know why. There’s nothing left to say. He’s doing exactly what he said, and there’s no reason to continue this very professional conversation—

“One more thing.” He calls, and you nearly trip yourself with how fast you turn back around. “It would be good if we keep this trip between us. People can get… uncomfortable, with Empire technology. We don’t want to spook anyone with information off.”

“Sounds like a plan, Din Djarin.” He keeps staring down at you, helmet masked in the dim light of the planets moons.

“You keep saying my name.” He says it, but it doesn't sound like he's angry. Almost like he just wants to know why.

“I’m planning to wear it out, considering how much you wanted to keep it from me.” Even from a level up, you can hear him breathe out— and then he laughs. Just once, and the sound makes you stand up on your toes, like you’re leaning towards it.

“Goodnight.” He says, then disappears, the lock of his door sounding obnoxiously loud.

You wanted to ask him more questions. Listen to his voice— the low, vibrating tone of it soothing your screaming thoughts. He was right, of course. You knew first hand how quickly people shut down when being questioned on old tech. Only, people knew your face, and would dismiss your questions.

But now you had something; someone new on your side. And not a single person in the galaxy knew he was coming but you.

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